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Chapter Text

So the Bitch Walked Into the Hanged Man

On a good day, The Hanged Man smelled of day old piss and vomit.

This was not a good day.

Hawke held up whatever nug-ass liquor she had ordered up to her lips. The shit was vile, but she was too drunk to care. Hell, she might not even care if people could see a family resemblance between her and Gamlin right now.

The Battle with the Arishok had left Hawke the Champion of Kirkwall; it had also left her barely alive, mostly alone, and fairly pissed off for the last three years.

Today was her three year anniversary of saving her lover’s ass, so Isabela could waltz away scot-free: avoid responsibility, learn nothing, and leave a gaping hole where Hawke’s heart had been.

Maker, Hawke was a sucker.

She heard a weapon unsheathe behind her; she turned and drew her sword.

She was fast, but drunk.

Really drunk.

If she’d thought about it, she probably wouldn’t have cared if the guy killed her right now. It would only improve her mood.

Fucking Isabella…yeah, fuck her. Actually, she really missed fucking her.

The floor was moving on its own.

Stupid Hanged Man bar thingy. Maker, she was drunk.

The man wielding the short sword was holding his body at a funny angle. Hawke cocked her head to match the angle.

He blinked.

She blinked.

The duster wasn’t moving, he seemed frozen in place by fear.

There was a blade at his throat closer than Hawke’s. It must have arrived there first, she concluded. She waiting for the man’s body to spin back around in front of her, in focus, so she could cleave his head off. She didn’t really care either way, but today was a good day to kill anyone who fucked with her.

The man tried to give a shot to the ribs to the woman holding the dagger behind him. She had great breasts, Hawke thought, and then she felt the familiar spatter of warm blood cross her face as the blade cut the man’s throat. Really great breasts. She appeared to have giant floating breasts, as far as Hawke was concerned.

“You’d think a dagger at the throat would be warning enough not to do something stupid.” a familar worked it's way into Hawke's ear

That voice sounded familiar. Hawke loved that her stomach felt like it had let loose a thousand butterflies, that felt great…though the bar floor was starting to buck under her feet.

Hawke attempted to sheathe her sword, missed, dropped it and managed to only half fall on the floor. She was held up off the ground by a shaky hand. She pushed up and warbled to her feet.

Three years ago, Isabela had barely checked to see if Hawke was still breathing before she took off. The Arishok was probably still bleeding out when Isabela took ship.

She hadn’t even said, goodbye. All those years of sex, fun, and company…poof…gone.

“Hello.” the magical talking breasts said to her.

Bitch.

“Hello.” She said back to them. Had she ever been this drunk?

“Hawke, are you okay?” Hawke managed to not smack her head as she fell to the ground. It felt so safe, the ground. She liked it. Nice and firm…like those talking breasts.

Loved those things. She’d seen them before somewhere. Sure she had. Wait. She had. In her bed…those were Isabela’s talking breasts. Her brain was getting too fogged to process anymore.

A mage behind Isabela pointed his staff at the ceiling and pulling energy started to cast a spell at Hawke. A familiar thoop of an arrow shot past Hawke and buried itself in the man’s skull. He was dead before he hit the ground.

“Thoop.” Is all Hawke managed to say before the floor started spinning. Bianca sure told that guy what was up.

Something about Isabela.

Yeah, she’d been in love with her a few years ago, and it was probably something to do with why she was drunk right now…

The Rivaini turned to make sure there were no more attackers. What the hell had she walked back into? Hawke, by all rights should be dead if this was an example of everyday in Kirkwall nowadays.

It had never occurred to her in the three years she had been gone that Hawke might not be alive. Nor had she ever seen Hawke this drunk. Hell, she’s barely seen sailors this drunk.

“It’s my anniversary of should of been dead day.” Hawke held up her fist in the air. “My girlfriend left me, this I know…”She started in a sing-song drunken fashion.

“Maker. Hawke. Hawke.” The honey voice of the pirate penetrated Hawke’s drunken slurring. Her ice blue eyes tried to focus on the breasts woman. No luck.

“Whats-it-going-on?” She slurred. Her arm felt nice as she gripped it. Was it for balance? Naw, she was laying down. Felt nice and warm to grip it. Comforting.

“She didn’t take the news of your leaving very well.” Varric said casually crossing to the pirate as if they’d spoken yesterday instead of three years hence. He closed up Bianca and slipped his crossbow onto his back. “Oh, she’s not like this all the time. Normally, she’s much more sober and killing people by the dozen.”

“Was she really that upset?” In a way Isabela hoped it was true. She didn’t want Hawke to have suffered, but she might stand a chance of winning her back if she cared. If she didn’t care, they could always go back to great sex. If Hawke would have her.

“Hey boobs.” Hawke slurred.

“Oh, yes.” Varric crossed over to Hawke. “Help me get her up, Rivaini.”

“We aren’t dragging her across Kirkwall are we?” Isabela groaned at Hawke’s dead weight.

Hawke swung up and tried to help them by standing, but it just made things worse.

“No, just put her in your old room up here.” Varric nodded at the staircase leading upstairs.

They both staggered under Hawke’s dead weight. They practically drug up the stairs and into Isabela’s old room. Hadn’t changed much. Hadn’t changed at all, actually. At least as far as she could tell.

Varric and Isabela unceremoniously dumped Hawke on the large bed in the far corner of the upstairs room.

Isabela started untying Hawke’s armor.

“Just leave it.” Varric offered.

“It’s not like I haven’t taken this off a thousand times before.” Isabela smiled at some of the memories. She could get into that armor pretty fast on any given day. She liked the memory of Hawke hurriedly shirking off armor at lightening speed, desperate to touch and be touched.

Sometimes Isabela would only take the armor off parts she needed access to, especially for a tryst in an alleyway or right outside the Hanged Man. She smiled at the thought. Semi-pubic screwing of Hawke was always a good memory.

Hawke had really talented hands, and a really talented mouth.

Hawke had pinned her up against the outside wall of the Hanged Man once in full armor, she ripped her panties off with her teeth, and rested Isabela on her strong shoulders. Hawke was not bulky in anyway, but she was incredibly strong her small form housed muscles as strong as steel cable. When Isabela had first felt Hawke’s tongue lap across her clit knew she Hawke had serious talent between the sheets.

And Varric was saying something to her…

“I don’t think that’s necessary Isabela. She’s not going to notice either way. It’s not worth the trouble, besides I can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings.” Varric said smiling. “I will enjoy my front row seat here at the tavern. Actually, you are right. Maybe you should take her armor on and put it on yourself. She’s going to have a hell of a hangover tomorrow.”

“She’ll still be drunk for most of tomorrow if I’m any judge.” Isabela said pulling off a greave.

“I think you might be right. Should I check on you if I don’t here anything?”

“If you don’t hear anything? Yes. By tomorrow we should be fighting or fucking…or both.”

“Fair point.” Varric said. “I’ll only come in if it’s quiet tomorrow night.”
Varric closed the door behind him on the way out. He grinned to himself. With Isabela back in town, Kirkwall just got a great deal more interesting…so did the Champion.

Isabela pulled off her other greave and started working on her chest plate. She always liked taking off Hawke’s armor. It was like opening a present. Isabela took her time, but in a few minutes Hawke was down to her small clothes.

Hawke’s breathing had become deep and regular. Isabela had never spend the night at Hawke’s estate. It seemed too clingy at the time, but Isabela had always loved it when Hawke had been satisfied, at least a few times, and it was time to go. She always left right before dawn as the sky started to lighten. Hawke was spent by then and wouldn’t wake until daybreak.

It was time to go now, but Isabela decided she could lie down and rest beside her old lover for just a minute.

She’s tried every type of lover she could come across in the last three years, but none of them had measured up to Hawke. Yes, Hawke was technically proficient in bed, and that gave her an inherit advantage over most, but the sex was different with Hawke.

As many times as she had cried out Hawke’s name when they were in bed together, it didn’t add up to how many times she had cried out her name in the last three years no matter who she was fucking.

Isabela hated to admit it, but she hadn’t found better sex. She hadn’t even found comparable sex. Hawke had spoiled her for women and men. It was annoying. She’d tried to get Hawke out of her mind the last three years, but every time she had sex with or without someone else in the room Hawke haunted her.

Isabela loved her.

No, she loved being with her.

She couldn’t love her. It was just they were so sexually compatible; it was worth the risk for that good a fuck. The risk of coming back here and facing Hawke.

Isabela dozed off to pleasant thoughts of Hawke touching her, tasting her…

“Isabela.” The word sounded harsh coming out of Hawke’s mouth. Isabela woke up with her own dagger to her throat.

Isabela was instantly wide-awake and alert with her heart pounding in her ears. “Hello Hawke. Miss me?” was all she could think of to say.

Hawke was in a bra and a very translucent lacy pair of panties that were quite distracting. Isabela had given her those years ago. Hawke only wore them for special occasions…like trying to kill her, apparently.

Hawke was crouched low on the bed holding the blade to Isabela’s neck. “What the hell is going on?”

Isabela decided she was going to defuse the situation or die trying. It was about a 50/50 shot at this point. If Hawke was serious with the dagger she was dead anyway. Isabela pushed Hawke’s hand and arm back and away from her throat. Hawke let her.

The dagger dropped to the ground with a clank and a dull ringing sound.

“Damn you, Isabela.” Hawke pulled her hand back to cuff her, but even all the frustration of the last three years bottled up in a moment couldn’t give her enough cause to slap the woman much less hit her.

Hawke had spent the last three years waking up in the middle of the night and fumbling in the dark for another round of Isabela as she had done for years before, but there was never an Isabela there. The sting of it hurt fresh every night. When Hawke woke up in the middle of the night and found Isabela in bed next to her…a strange bed at that, it was just too much. She was sure it was a trick. Isabela was gone. It must have been blood magic…a demon or something.

Demons don’t disarm; they kill. Her brain feeding her logic only made matters more confusing.

Hawke touched Isabe’sla face quizzically. Did you get hallucinations with hangovers? Hangovers? Who was she kidding? She was still drunk.

When Hawke brushed her fingers over Isabela face, as much as Isabela had missed the Hawke’s touch, she wanted to feel her hands in her own again. They often touched hands when making love. Maker. When fucking. What was wrong with her?

Demons also were unlikely to have Isabela’s smell or the warm hand of her confident touch. Dammit, she had to kiss the illusion.

Hawke lunged at Isabela like a starving beast desperate for a meal. Hawke’s mouth found Isabela’s. It was the same kiss she remembered. It was confident but not forceful. Maker, if it was a dream let it be a wet one.

It was like kissing Isabela, but different. Isabela was kissing her back as though she cared, instead of just wanting a fuck.

Hawke let her weight drop on Isabela as she trailed her hand down to her soft warm breast Isabela squirmed beneath her. If it was real…Hawke had to know.

Little or no foreplay was needed after this long. Hawke slid down Isabela’s body and tugged at her underwear with her teeth. Isabela threatened to come undone at the very idea of Hawke tasting her, again.

Isabela grabbed Hawke by her scruffy dark hair as she ripped off her underwear. She had forgotten how much underwear she went through with Hawke.

Hawke tasted Isabela for the first time in three years. Isabela shrieked in pleasure and twisted Hawke’s hair around her fingers as much as the short hair would let her. Maker, but she felt amazing.

Isabela almost came at Hawke’s first taste of her. “Hawke.” It was the first time in years the name escaped her lips and it was attached to the person she was with, the woman she was with. Isabela had always enjoyed the company of women, but was surprised in the time they were together she never craved for something else unless Hawke was going to be joining.

It was definitely her. Hawke didn’t know what to think, so she didn’t.

She was being gentle with Isabela, and generally Isabela was into anything but…but this felt different. It felt so good. She didn’t want to come because she didn’t want it to stop. They had just started, but who knew if there would be another round when Hawke wrapped her mind around everything.

Hawke had always loved the way Isabela tasted. She wanted to lap up every bit she could. She felt Isabela getting wetter and slicker. She mover her tongue from teasing her clit to licking just inside her, lapping up everything she could. When Isabela felt Hawke shift she begged for more of everything. Her hips moved forward, and she had to look down and watch. See that it was really Hawke. It was really her tongue.

Hawke sensed what she was doing. She looked up at her. Ice blue eyes staring into honey brown ones. For an unreal fantasy come true that moment seemed so real. She just couldn’t believe she was staring down at her. Hawke looked away. Whether it was too much emotion or she wanted to concentrate on what she was doing Isabela didn’t care.

Hawke’s eyes were filled with passion, emotion, but not hate or rage. Isabela felt her heart skip a beat. She wasn’t accustomed to trying to process emotion, especially during sex.

She had hoped to have a tryst with Hawke, even if Hawke took out every hate filled thought on her. Isabela felt she deserved it after all she had done. Hawke had learned over the years not to betray any emotions during sex. Isabela did not like clingy, but it had been years, and Isabela’s eyes were misty too.

Chapter Text

Isabela let out a scream and she didn’t care who heard her.

At this point she felt she was practically bragging. She’d been aching for Hawke for years, and it seemed like the desire was mutual. The Pirate thought at the minimum, she would have to kick Hawke’s lover out of bed. Whoever or whatever she had taken for a lover. She wasn’t sure who the lover would be, but she had expected it to be someone, even if it was the elf she favored from the brothel.

Perhaps the lack of competition was a lull, or someone yet unidentified.

She had been prepared to fight for Hawke, but Hawke was acting like there wasn’t anyone else. She didn’t expect Hawke to be overly attached to anyone, but it would be a shame to let a body like that with a talent for sex go to waste. It was Hawke, what had she been thinking.

Isabela thought she might have mentioned someone, but then again they weren’t really talking. Mostly they were fucking.

Hawke had always been a bit amorous toward Isabela, but where it once had bothered her she now relished it.

Hawke hadn’t stopped from the moment she realized it was Isabela. It was like she needed to hold on to something.

Isabela had barely had a break from Hawke’s mouth anywhere, not that she was complaining, but surely Hawke would have been in need of a little attention.

Hawke had most recently pinned her down on the small writing desk under the window. The light from outside was pouring in porthole.

Maker, Isabela thought as Hawke moved her tongue across her slick clit.

They’d been fucking for hours, and neither woman showed any signs that it might end soon.

Eventually, Hawke had finished taking off Isabela’s clothes piecemeal until there was nothing left. The desk was too small for any human to really fit on it. Hawke took advantage of the extra exposed skin and raked what very little nail she had down Isabela’s back.

Isabela felt herself groan. She didn’t care what Hawke was doing, it all felt amazing.

Hawke spread Isabela’s folds as open as she could with her hand before covering her with her tongue. She licked everywhere tasting everything. The pace was frenetic, and had an edge of desperation to it but desperation it and that probably made it feel even better.

Hawke slipped two fingers inside Isabela. Isabela was caught off guard by her gruff maneuvering, but simply didn’t care getting lost in the sweating, screaming, and slickness of everything. Orgasm after unrelenting orgasm had been building to this for hours.

Isabela’s slick walls were clamping down on Hawke’s fingers. Isabela was too slick for it to slow Hawke down from the swift stroking pace she had started, but Hawke had been getting closer to letting go herself at Isabela’s obvious enjoyment of everything.

It was everything she had missed in bed, with desire, and a familiarity of trust. At least enough trust that no one was getting hurt as long as they were fucking.

Hawke pressed her body against Isabela’s. Hawke kept her fingers pulling in and out of Isabela, and added her thumb to massage her hard wet clit as she moved up to kiss her erstwhile lover. Isabela tasted herself on Hawke’s lips. She loved the taste of fresh sex, but it had been years since she tasted herself on Hawke’s lips.

Hawke was drenched in hard won sweat. Their bodies were slick with it and sex.

Hawke kissed Isabela with more passion than she thought she had left in her life. She kissed the Rivaini deeply, as if she was trying to drink of her soul…if she had one. Hawke managed to convey emotion in the kiss even after all the fucking. Hawke kissed her with whatever love she had left in her.

Hawke’s thumb continued to run across Isabela’s clit sending little electrical shots of pleasure through her body; Isabela had been building to this for hours. She grabbed hold of Hawke shoulders pressing her body up against Hawke’s. The sweat was so hot and slick her body felt vague, which made it all the more fun. Vague or not she was there, fucking her, kissing her, touching her in the most intimate way anyone could.

Of all things, a kiss was the last thing she would have thought that was going to send her over the edge.

This was exactly the type of orgasm Isabela never had. The kind where you just had to let go and trust the other person. She was going to get off either way…the rumbling in her throat gave way to a shriek that caught her a bit by surprise. She knew she was close, she just hadn’t thought it was going to be right now.

She didn’t care anymore. Isabela let go and let Hawke have her. She could have whatever she wanted. Isabela screamed in pleasure as she let herself go practically laughing that this is what it took. Three years of crap sex and a spurned lover later she was having starting the hardest orgasm she could remember. It had been a while since she was this…Maker, Hawke bit at her neck fucking her harder with her fingers. By all rights it should have hurt by now but it didn’t.

Isabela’s body was jerking of it’s own accord and Hawke clung on to her neck with her lips. Sweat was running down her face, and her arm ached from the angle she was at, but Isabela felt incredible and she wasn’t going to break the rhythm at any cost. Isabela was a bit more buxom and soft compared to Hawke’s body make of hard muscle and tension. She had missed the way her body felt against her own.

Isabela’s world went black for a moment and she choked on the breath she had just taken in. Isabela often gave voice to her orgasm, but this shriek just slipped out. It sounded different, felt different. Her ears were ringing and she clamped down on Hawke’s fingers. Isabela’s world went from black to covered in white static as she came. Her body was so taunt, and then it just started bucking, just reacting to what she felt.

Hawke felt her coming, but this time it seemed different than most. It was intense, but it was always intense. Hawke looked up at her normally snarky Isabela she had known over the years and it almost looked like it was replaced with a trusting lover. The orgasm felt amazing. And she was seeing sheets of color when she came. She didn’t feel that connected to her body, but she felt connected to Hawke, and that was all that mattered.

In that moment she let Hawke take her body mind a soul. She handed over the keys to the house and Hawke took them.

Isabela rode wave after wave of orgasm and realized that loud noise was still her screaming. Tears slipped out of her eyes and she grabbed Hawke holding on to her. Hawke felt everything shift and stopped. She reached around Isabela and pulled her tight.

“I missed you, Bela.” Was all she managed to say as she held her. Her pirate queen rode through the aftershocks of her orgasm. Hawke simply held her tight. The sweat was still hot, but it was starting to cool when Isabela rode through the last wave of pleasure.

She wanted to say something to Hawke. What would she say? Hi? It’s been along time? I missed you fucking my brains out? Would you like to kiss me now?

Hawke said nothing else; she wrapped the pirate up around her body and carried her back over to the bed. Isabela could have put down her feet and walked, but she tightened her legs hold around Hawke’s waist. Hawke pushed her down roughly on the bed. She kissed her slowly, deeply, and deliberately. She pushed the pirate’s body to her the slightest bit closer.

Then something changed. Hawke froze for a moment, and pushed herself off Isabela.

Tired Hawke flopped over on her side of the bed. Isabela remembered she always favored the right side of the bed. What an odd thing to remember. The pirate wished she hadn’t gone so far away.

She sidled up next to Hawke. Hawke pushed a hard breath out.

“Maybe we should let this go.” Hawke said it. The words hung in the air. Isabela was confused.

“Are you kidding? That was the best fuck in a decade.” Isabel was incredulous.

“That’s the problem.” Hawke said wiping the sweat away from her eyes. Hawke ran her fingers through her short cropped messy hair. “It wasn’t just a fuck.”

***

“Wait. No one walks away from sex that like that.” Isabela was having a hard time reacting to competing emotions. “Well most people don’t walk for a bit after sex like that.” She said half joking. What was Hawke on about? That was the best all around romp she could remember.

“Maybe they should.” Was Hawke getting up and getting dressed? Really?

“Hawke.” Isabela started softly. She’d loved the way everything was going until now. “I can’t let you leave that horny. Imagine what people would say.” She purred in Hawke’s ear.

“No one I know cares what people say, you least of all.” Hawke looked at her for the first time without the lust. There had been a whole lot of hunger covering a whole lot of hurt. Isabela saw it in her eyes before she turned away. The glance was fleeting, but there was much more pain than Isabela would have imagined. For some unselfish reason, she felt bad, and just wanted to hold Hawke and tell her it would all be okay.

But Isabela chastised herself. She knew she was a shit. She knew she was bad for Hawke and always had been.

She just loved the way Hawke made her feel when they were together. She made her feel like more than a back alley fuck. Hawke had never showed any sign of shame or pride when they had been together in Kirkwall. It could have been a friend mentioning it in passing or someone yelling crap from the street. She had just been with Isabela. Isabela had been neither her trophy nor albatross. She showed her genuine affection in bed, and out in public, at least in her own way. Hawke was more private, but she never treated Isabela as anything other than a woman she was happy to be with…and Isabela had run away from Hawke without even a goodbye.

While Isabela had gotten lost in thought, Hawke had gotten dressed. Isabela grabbed clothes and fumbled with putting them on, “Wait.” She said to Hawke as Hawke fastened on her sheathed sword.

Hawke didn’t turn around. She had built up momentum getting ready and she wasn’t going to let anything slow her down.

Isabela put herself between Hawke and the door. Hawke wouldn’t go through her, but she started to go around her. The Rivaini placed her back up against the door. “Hawke, wait, here me out.”

“There isn’t alot to talk about, Isabela. You’ve seen me at my worst. You just saw me at my worst last night.”

“I know. I know I’ve been a shit. Okay, I’ve been worse than a shit. I know, I left you alone for the last few years, but I came back. I came back because I missed you.” Hawke’s eyes had glazed over, she wasn’t really listening to her. She was waiting for her to clear the door.

“If what we just had were feelings, I’m okay with it. I’m not accustomed to feelings being fun.” Isabela felt her throat synch shut in a painful ache. Tears were welling in her eyes, threatening to spill. Maker, what was wrong with her?

Hawke’s gaze snapped to Isabela’s eyes. Hawke’s watery blue eyes were now like ice, and could cut just as deep. Cold eyes locked on to Isabela’s. Underneath the ice was bitter hurt. Hurt Isabela had caused.

“Hawke we’ve had great times together. We could have great times again.” Hawke was damned sexy. Anger just complicated it and made her sexy in a different way.

“I think that ship has sailed, Isabela. When you left…I didn’t know it would hurt so much. I know there was nothing we had that was more than…”

Isabela couldn’t let her keep talking. Hawke was talking herself right out of the room and Isabela’s life. Hawke hadn’t completely closed herself off yet. She could still get her to listen to reason or listen to her body.

Isabela rushed to Hawke and kissed the slightly taller woman. Hawke reacted instinctively kissing her back as she had 1,000 times before. While Hawke was distracted she needed to keep her distracted. There had always been a small gap in the armor where she could push her small hand passed it and reach in and stroke Hawke. It wasn’t comfortable, but the bit of pain that came with it made it a tab bit more interesting.

Hawke had been fucking Isabela for hours and her body betrayed her excitement at Isabela’s touch. She swallowed whatever sound started to come out of her body.

Hawke had wanted a clean exit. She didn’t think she could go through this again.

Isabela only got a few simple strokes in before Hawke’s body started to react. She was definitely in need of attention. Hawke grabbed Isabela wrist and composed herself. “I should be going. I don’t need a pity fuck.”

“Is that what you think this is, because that is simply not something I have ever done. And even if I ever had in my life, it wouldn’t have been with you.” Isabela was close to her. Too close. She could feel her breath on her, and it was almost enough for her to give in right then. “I’ll stay with you no matter what, if you ask.” Isabela breathed.

“I shouldn’t have to ask.”

Isabela swallowed hard, and thought about what she was saying. “Then I’ll stay with you no matter what.” She was searching Hawke’s face for forgiveness.

Hawke would eventually give in to lust. She had been Hawke’s lover for too long. The woman was near her breaking point when it came to sex no matter how pissed off she was. There was always a chance she could win Hawke back in bed.

“I’ll think on it.” Hawke managed growl as she pushed Isabela out of the way and toward the main staircase at the Hanged Man. Isabela gave chase and was surprised at how easily Hawke had let her catch up. Then she saw why.

It was a motley group of hodgepodge at one of the larger tables. Merrill was smiling and waving vigorously to her. Next to her was Aveline, who looked anything but pleased, Fenris had never looked pleased, and Anders was next to him. Who thought up the seating arrangement of death. Varric, good humored as always raised a mug, “Champion.” He nodded.

“It’s so great to see you back. To see you both back together, if you are together. Are you together? I’ve missed you so much Isabela…and your stories. Well, I’ve missed your stories too, but not as much as I’ve missed you, of course. I’m going on and on aren’t I.”

“Hawke?” Isabela asked.

“We’ll finish talking about this later.” Hawke said under her breath.

Varric brought over two fresh drinks and put them down on the table. Hawke sat next Aveline, and Isabela followed suit and sat next to Hawke. Without thinking she put her hand high up on Hawke’s thigh, as she had often done when they drinking at the Hanged Man.

Hawke either hadn’t noticed or hadn’t cared. It felt good to be touching Hawke.

In truth, Hawke had noticed when the Rivani had slipped her hand on Hawke’s thigh, but she had missed Isabela terribly. Isabela touching her felt familiar, comfortable, and gave her a false sense of stability.

Hawke was pretty sure they were over. Sure Isabela was a great fuck, but there were plenty of those to be found in Kirkwall.

She had almost instantly removed the offending hand from her thigh, but what harm could a little contact do? It did feel nice to be next to Isabela, again. She was almost lulled by the touch for a moment. She had forgotten how much she loved the subtle smell of fresh flowers Isabela often wore on her skin. It was intoxicating. Without thinking Hawke slipped her hand into the small of Isabela’s back. Stroking her back, comforting her, as she had always done after a hard day’s…well anything: killing, fighting, searching, whatever.

Isabela decided to press her luck and move slightly north to the top of Hawke’s thigh. Her hand was definitely retractable, but she wanted to see what Hawke would do.

“So are the two of you back together?” Merrill intoned. “I was just wondering, I know it’s been years, but it seems like Hawke has been waiting for something for a longtime. I don’t know what it was exactly, but now that your back I wondered if it were you.”

“No.” Hawke said, but she didn’t remove Isabela’s hand from her leg. It gave Isabela a desperate last hope.

***

Chapter Text

“Isabela, what is wrong with you? You’ll have to cut down on your extra curricular activities if you can’t keep up.” Hawke said laughing at Isabela’s trip over a small stone. “I don’t know what you’ve been doing…sorry…who you’ve been doing since you’ve been back in Kirkwall, but it must be good to have you this distracted.”

Dammit, Hawke was the distraction, didn’t she realize that? Of course she realized that. Isabela wasn’t the only one who could be a bitch. The light-hearted jab at her was not making things easier.

It always amazed her that the whole of Thedas wouldn’t open up and swallow her when she needed it to… It seemed willing to do it at other random times.

“Jealous?” Isabel had nothing. It wasn’t even a good bluff.

“Nope.” Hawke retorted without looking back.

Merrill looked confused amongst the friendly fire. “I don’t understand. If you both care for each other then why aren’t you two together? I’d be with Hawke in a second if she’d have me, but she won’t, it tried…I’m talking out loud again aren’t I?”

“Yep.” Hawke stated absently kicking a rock.

Isabela sighed heavily, “You see Kitten, people aren’t designed to make sense, that would take all the fun out of the world.”

“More like,” Aveline stopped to turn around to Merrill “Hawke is being fussy, Isabela hurt her, so she has to hurt her back for an unset amount of time making us all suffer under the awkwardness. Then one of the other of them will get tired of the game, and the other will pick up and chase the other.”

“I am right here you know.” Hawke stated.

“Yes, but your no good for gossip especially about yourself.” Merrill turned to Aveline ”That makes no sense.” Merrill said.

“Just add in the fact that they are both women,” Aveline said starting down the trail again.

Merrill took pause for a moment. “Oh, that I could see.”

“That is so sexist of you big girl, but you might have a fair point.” Isabela decided to join the camaraderie.

Isabela and Hawke was by no means an item, in fact other than a visit today Isabela hadn’t seen Hawke at all. She’d been drowning her sorrows at the Hanged Man. Even the local whorehouse had no appeal, and for Isabela that was near impossible. She’d never gone two weeks without sex much less a month.

She’d even sunk to asking Varric if Hawke was sleeping with anyone.

“If she’s not sleeping with you, then I doubt it.” Varric had offered her a seat for a round of Wicked Grace, but beating Anders was such a bore.

They were in the process of leaving Sundermount for the Kirkwall. Everyone was caked in her usual amount of gore, and everything had been going fairly straightforward until now.

Kill bad guys around the mountain, pick up stolen cargo (bury it where it’s owner’s could easily find it later), and kill a few slavers, bandits, and giant spiders on the way. Aveline had picked up a rather nice new shield off a dead giant spider…where did they hide those things? Giant spiders eating armor always seemed terribly strange. Very strange straightforward mundane stuff.

Hawke had been trying put a new two-handed sword to work that she recently had had recently forged and had been pleased with the easy it cleaved people in half. No need to stay the body with your foot and pull the weapon out, just swing and ready for the next foe.

They had run into a couple of Shades and Hawke and Aveline had dispatched them quickly. Isabela had been watching Hawke slice one in half in her sleeveless armor entranced be her sleek well-defined trim muscles. She had loved when Hawke had used those same muscles for careful stroking. She never needed much power to pleasure Isabela, just the right tenacity. She longed for Hawke’s touch though she hated to admit it even to herself. Lost in thought she hadn’t noticed an Arcane Horror appear beside her.

“Isabela.” Merrill called out.

Isabela easily rolled away from its initial attack, but not before she felt something unpleasant flick at her side. She had mostly dispatched the horror before Merrill too far from Aveline and Hawke hit it with some sort of freezing spell. Isabela never knew what it was she did, but she like that it would shatter into a thousand pieces with the quick work of her blade.

Damn, her side hurt. It was just behind where she couldn’t see. She was sure it was a flesh wound, but it stung.

They were losing light, and they weren’t even close to the Dalish camp. It looked like they would be camping overnight…and by the look of it overnight in the rain.

Isabela had rushed at the chance to accompany Hawke, again. She was trying anyway to prove herself worthy of Hawke’s attention. Right now she had Hawke’s attention in a way she didn’t want it. She was slowing the group down.

Merrill had tried to help Isabella earlier when she noticed the pirate was favoring her right side, but the Rivani shoed her away.

Aveline stopped and stuck her battered shield in the ground and leaned against it. She finally looked dead on at Isabela.

***

When Isabela opened her door at the Hanged Man earlier that day and found Hawke on the other side of it she had stood there and stared at her dumbly for possibly a full two seconds.

When Hawke had started to speak, Isabela rushed to her, kissing her, lashing at her with her tongue. Initially, Hawke had taken Isabela in her embrace and kissed her back fully as she had done for many years. If it was true Hawke had no lover, she would be in need by now. Hawke was never one to hold out, until now. Then Hawke changed. She grew cold and pulled away from Isabela. She muttered something about coin and Sundermount. Did Isabela want to go?

It seemed Hawke was as surprised by her instinctive response to Isabela, as Isabela was to the stinging tear that fell down her cheek. She and Hawke both pretended not to notice. Hawke inadvertently laced her fingers between Isabela’s and said she would wait outside. She walked downstairs, her touch trailed behind her.

Isabela was so rushed she almost left without her third dagger.

***

Isabela had been falling behind. Hawke felt pretty sure it was a ploy to get her to talk the Isabela one on one. They hadn’t spoken since…since she had walked down the stairs of the Hanged Man. They had made an occasional jab at each other, but nothing more.

Hawke whetted her lips and longed for the pirate’s taste on her lips. When she’d gone to Isabela’s door to ask if she would like to join a few people to share a bit of coin in retrieving lost goods she hadn’t expected emotion from the Rivani or herself. It was getting harder to deny her feelings for Isabela and the hunger for sex was driving her mad, but some reason she only wanted Isabela. Hawke knew opening that door would be messy, but she was on the verge of giving in.

***

Hawke let herself get lost in thought of the time she had realized she had feelings for Isabela.

She smiled inadvertently at the memory of barging in on Isabela in the Hanged Man without knocking. Isabela had taken to entertaining herself, Hawke thought she might appreciate more of a helping hand or a helping tongue.

They had only had sex once before at Hawke’s estate. She was surprised Isabela had waited so long to bed her, she had naturally assumed Isabela had no interest in her. Isabela generally took what she wanted, and when she wanted some girly fun she ended up at Hawke’s estate. Hawke had spent enough time watching Isabela, and Isabela watching her watching her watch to know of Hawke’s interest.

Hawke was not subtle in battle, conquest, or bed, but she did have finesse and was quick to learn ways to pleasure her lover. Hawke was a bit of a natural though.

It helped, a lot.

Isabela wanted no attachments after their first tryst, though she had left an open invitation for more.

Hawke and Isabela’s relationship was fun and adventurous, just as much as they themselves were.

When Hawke walked in on Isabela just beginning a bit of fun time for herself she didn’t even bother to close the door behind her. “Need a hand?” Hawke rarely skipped foreplay, but she didn’t even break stride as she knelt on the bed and opened Isabela’s growing wetness with her fingers. She went straight for the pirate’s clit, which was more or less what Isabela had just been fantasizing about.

Isabela didn’t realize at the time, but sealing the deal on a fantasy in the moment opened her up to more than just great sex.

Hawke ran her hand up Isabela’s shirt gently squeezing her nipple as she lapped gently at her clit. Isabela wanted more and harder, but Hawke had decided the pace this time, and this time she would make her wait. There was no rush. Isabela was keenly aware of the open door, but it just excited her more. Why would she care if anyone saw her with Hawke.

Hawke with her short rumpled hair and deep blue eyes pulled herself up to kiss Isabela. It was the first time she tasted herself oh Hawke’s lips, and it would become one of her favorite tricks Hawke enjoyed. Hawke loved to tease, but the payoff was always worthwhile.

Isabela groaned in anticipation as Hawke slowly let her full weight drop on top of Isabela and gradually teasing pushed inside her. Isabela was so wet, her body begged for Hawke, and Hawke loved every moment of it. Their second tryst had been so simple, much like the one following Hawke’s drunken stupor. She simply slid in and out of Isabela's while stroking her clit with a well-placed thumb. She ever so slowly increased the pace and pressure, but she make Isabela practically beg for it. When Isabela was trembling so close to coming ,Hawke had backed off a couple of times making her wait for it.

Hawke finally let her come while kissing her. It was one of the few times Isabela was spent after only one time.

“That was just about perfect.” Isabela had whispered in her ear. “Talk about your fantasy coming true, the Maker himself could not have planned better timing.” Isabela haughty a laugh, but it was filled with merriment.

Hawke had just laid next to her, as new lovers enjoy doing and run her hand up and down Isabela’s curves making her smile and occasionally shudder. Hawke hadn’t wanted anything from her, though, of course Isabela had insisted, and she who was she to argue?

“I think that was just about perfect, too” Hawke purred back in to her ear. Hawke had forgotten Isabela had gotten up to close the door and returned to bed, but only to press her head against Hawke’s shoulder to fall asleep.

Hawke had forgotten about that second session until she stumbled upon it lost in thought.

They were losing light fast.

“We should make camp.” Hawke stated flatly. They had camped in this spot many times. It was easily defendable and no predators. Anything that smelled elf or human ran from this area.

The four women had done this so many times the relative silence was comforting. Hawke made and stoked the fire. It was her favorite part. She tended it far more than it needed tending. The clouds threating rain had abated for the moment. There was cover here, but it would still lead to sopping wet cranky people headed home in the morning.

Hawke stood up and turned right into Isabela. “It’s not too late to forage if you’d prefer something fresh rather than rations.” Hawke was only slightly taller than Isabella, but she seemed to tower over her. She seemed so powerful.

“Maker be damned, your worse than I was with Donnic.” Aveline finally said. “It’s pathetic, just kiss her. Andraste’s tits.”

Hawke did as commanded. She had wanted to, she just needed permission to feel emotions. Was that it? She didn’t know.

Hawke kissed Isabela gently on the lips and slowly pulled her toward her. When she pulled Isabela to her Aveline walked off shaking her head and Merrill just watched more intently. She wanted her friends to be happy, and she liked watching them be happy…a little.

“Merrill.” Aveline called from the other side of camp. “Come over here and help me with…I don’t know…something…”

“But they’re just getting to the good part.” Merrill protested innocently.

“Yes, that’s why I want you over here with me out of the way.”

Hawke had forgotten time and place and was lost in the kiss as was Isabela. When Hawke fully pulled Isabela cried out, but not in pleasure. It was that damn stich in her side. That flesh wound whatever it was, it hurt.

“I’m sorry.” Isabela stammered. It’s a flesh wound. I can’t quite see it.

“Come closer to the fire” Hawke said. “Merrill come here.” Hawke barked at her

“Aveline said.”

“What’s wrong with you Hawke?” Aveline said.

“It’s just a flesh wound.” Isabela said.

“It’s not a flesh wound.” Hawke said. “Merrill can you do something?”

On Isabela’s lower back was what appeared to be a small mouth, and it appeared to have a taste for Isabella’s flesh.

“I…I don’t think so. I don’t know this kind of magic. I could get Marethari the camp is not far.” Merrill stammered.

“Go.” Hawke said, but Merrill was already running. “Fast.”

“Aveline. Go get Anders in case Marethari fails. There is no better healer in Kirkwall. Maybe she can keep whatever this is at bay until Anders can get here. Maybe she can heal her, I don’t know. Just go get Anders.”

“He’s not exactly stable lately.” Aveline switched her weight from one foot to the other.

“Has he ever been stable?” Hawke asked.

“Point taken. I’ll be as quick as I can.” Aveline left.
And everyone left Isabela in puzzlement. But Hawke was near. She was suddenly very tired.

“Should I be worried about the drama that just occurred. Do I want to know what is on my back?’

“Have you ever worried with me?” Hawke’s eye’s seemed soft and compassionate. Isabela could lose herself in those eyes. All the harshness was gone.

“I never worry about anything with you Hawke…well actually, I only that you’ll never give me a chance to be with you again.”

“If you live through this, I promise you’ll have your chance.” Isabela was lost in the words of hope for a moment before reality slunk back in…

“What do you mean ‘if I live through this’?” Isabela was suddenly quite alert and the pain was increasing.

“I don’t know why you should worry now you should have died of any number of VD by now were it not for Anders, surely this can’t be any worse.” Hawke said hopefully.

“If VD is you upbeat answer I really don’t want to know.”

“You really don’t want to know.”

“Well, since no one is around and we have a bit of time…”

“Rest Isabela, sex will always be available.”

“I’m going to hold you to that.” Isabela pushed her chin forward.

Hawke laughed a true laugh for what seemed the first time in ages. “I’m sure you will, and I will truly enjoy it. Just don’t fuck it up.”

“What could I possibly do to fuck it up?”

“Want me to give you past examples.”

“Good point.”

“Here share my bedroll with me until the others arrive. There’s nothing I can do for the…wound. I think you should rest”

“With you?” Isabela purred.

“With me.” Hawke said.

Though it had been years Isabela managed to find her favorite shoulder and go into a comforted sleep after a sweet simple kiss. Hawke didn’t know if it would be better if Isabela never woke up if the thing made her into something else, or if they could find a way to fight it.

This required mages and a prayer to the Maker she didn’t believe in, but she humbled herself and prayed as best she could.

Chapter Text

The night was late when Merrill arrived at the Dalish Camp and the camps flames were down to embers.

Maren stood guard, memories of their clan’s Halla’s death still plaguing her she was distracted and nearly attacked Merrill as Merrill was upon her before she realized anyone was there.

As usual Merrill was of a single mind. Get to Marethari Tales. Ask her for help. Take her to Isabela before it was too late. If it wasn’t too late already. That demon mouth on Isabela’s back. Merrill had never seen anything like it. People had lived or died being attacked by demons, shades, archane horrors or spirits gone awry, but she had never seen any leave a mark…much less a mouth eating away at…she couldn’t think about that right now.

“Hold.” Maren had already drawn her short sword and nicked Merrill’s neck. Both women were shocked. Maren’s short red hair normally pulled back had pushed forward into her eyes, Merrill gasped and began a spell. A single trickle of blood dripped from the tip of Maren’s blade.

Marethari appeared from nowhere, as she often did when Merrill was in crisis. Merrill found it unnerving. The trickle of blood could have been useful as blood magic, but the moment Marethari appeared everyone clan member knew nothing aggressive would happen concerning Merrill.

“Keeper,” Maren started.

“It’s okay, Maren. Return to your watch. Merrill brings no harm to the clan this night.”

Maren embarrassed retreated, “You always bring luck Merrill, but never the good kind.”

“Marethari, you must come, Isabela is hurt, and it’s like something I’ve never seen before…” Merrill began rambling in her quick-paced way.

“I know.” Marethari stated simply.

“You know? How can you know? Keeper you must come. Isabela needs you. Hawke needs you. I need you.” Merrill was near tears and exhaustion. Perhaps she should really invest in shoes with soles, they seemed so confining, but perhaps they were comfortable. Humans wore them. Hawke wore them. Hawke, how she loved to look at her feet, her body, her head…why was she always thinking about Hawke?

“I heard it on the wind. I knew you would be coming. The pirate woman is in danger it is true, but she is not the only one Da'len. You have no idea the dangers the Eluvian can bring. You must not speak to that Pride Demon.” Marethari said evenly. She always appeared so even and unflappable. Was she always this way? Had she been a nervous first the way Merrill had been. Why couldn’t Merrill concentrate?

“It was an Archane Horror, I think. It left a mark, a mouth on Isabela.” Merrill started.

“Did you hear me Da’len?” The Keeper asked simply.

“Does she ever listen to anyone?” Maren interjected. Merrill had always been a curiosity around the clan. She had always been different. She learned spells while most learned the bow. Maren had always been nervous around her. She was the Keeper’s First after all. She would be Keeper one day in her lifetime, but that was before she left the clan. She’d always been curious about Merrill, but they rarely ever had reason to speak. She found herself curious now. Who would give up being Keeper? What was more important than leading a clan? Merrill was frightened; even Maren realized she was brave in the face of danger, even if she was shy around people.

“Enough Maren.” Marethari’s simple rebuke was enough to humble Maren. She hated to displease the Keeper, as did everyone in the clan. Why was Merrill always causing trouble? In the low light Maren could see Merrill’s dark her shine even in the moonlight. Dread Wolf she was beautiful, if always troublesome. Wait. Did she just think that? Maren certainly hoped she hadn’t said it out loud, because suddenly Marethari and Merrill were looking at her in a strange way. She ducked into the shadows, but not out of ear shot.

“Please, Keeper. Please come with me. I’ve never seen this magic, but it looks frightening. She needs healing. I don’t know what to do.” Merrill begged.

“Give up the Eluvian. Come back to the clan. I will heal the human if I can.” Marethari said.

“Are you bartering with Isabela’s life?” Merrill was shocked and angry.

“No Da’len. The question is, ‘are you’?” The Keeper was giving her that even stare. She wasn’t budging. This was so infuriating and time was of the essence.

“I don’t have time to argue with you Keeper.” Merrill started angrily. No clan member ever dared raise his or her voice directly to the Keeper except Merrill. This was turning into an old fight.

“Come back to us Da’len. If your friend is as important as you think, at least give up the mirror. I will do what I can.” The Keeper almost seemed as though she was pleading with her eyes, but her voice was even.

“No. It is important to our people. Tell me how to help her. Tell me what to do, and you need not even come. Just tell me how to help Isabela.” Merrill was angry. How could she bring up the Eluvian when Isabela was dying?

Maren watched the argument. Merrill was fearless in her own way. Maren instinctively wanted to defend the Keeper, but the Keeper didn’t need anyone to defend her. She found herself speaking the opposite, and couldn’t believe the words were coming out of her mouth. “Won’t you help her Keeper? Help her friend. Hawke has done much for the clan. Even taken Merrill and kept her safe, in her own way as you asked. Why not go to her friend?”

Merrill had never heard another clan member take her side. Ever. In any conversation with Marethari about anything. It was truly a toss-up as to which of the three women were shocked more.

“This is Merrill’s choice. It has always been Merrill’s choice.” Marethari started. “It is simple. Give up the mirror Da’len, and I will go this moment.”

“No.” Merrill couldn’t believe she just said it. “No, I will not be bullied by you. Our people need this even if you don’t see it.”

Maren had never actually seen them fight; it was more rumored of than quoted. What was this mirror? She had heard of Eluvians.

“Then there is nothing I can do for you or your friend. If you bring her to me, I won’t turn her away, but the night is dangerous. I cannot put the clan last every time you need something Da’len. This time you must chose, and you have chosen. Maren, keep her safe. Make certain she stays here 'til dawn.” Marethari turned to leave.

“No. Keeper. You can’t. She could die.” Merrill called out desperately.

Marethari stopped in her tracks but didn’t turn around. “So could you Da’len. Give up this foolishness. Stay with your humans if you must, but the Eluvian will kill you. It could kill all of them. It could kill me if I let it.”

“It won’t. I won’t let it happen. Please I’ll do anything else.” Merrill pleaded.

“If the price of your dream is higher than the price of your friend’s lives, I have nothing to offer.” The Keeper walked off in the direction of her fire. “If it means anything to you. I also know nothing of this magic. I can offer no advice. I would have to see it for myself.”

“Keeper.” Merrill called out. “Keeper.”

It was no use Marethari had made up her mind and walked off. Merrill started to run off into the dark.

“I can’t let you do that, Merrill.” Maren said. “I can’t let you leave until daybreak.”

“What? You can’t be serious.” Merrill had tears in her eyes. She really cared for her friends. Why did she care for this mirror more?

“You know you couldn’t help your friend or you wouldn’t have left her. The night is dangerous, even in groups, one elf…I can’t let you go.” Maren was watching Merrill ready to spring after her if she ran.

“Why doesn’t anyone understand?" Merrill just dropped exhausted in a heap. They had spent the day marching to Sundermount and the whole day fighting before she had walked and fought her way around the mountain to the clan she was exhausted. Even if she ran, she couldn’t run far.

Maren started to grab her up by her arm, but on second thought knelt by her. Merrill’s eyes were so filled with sadness. She just wanted to take that away. She wanted to make her feel better. She looked Merrill in the eyes; her eyes were so expressive, even for an elf.

For the second time that night Maren found herself on the recipient end of finding out what her body was doing right after it was doing it. She reached forward and took Merrill by the chin and pressed her lips against Merrill’s own. Merrill’s shock was only equaled to her own.

Maren felt committed to the action and pulled Merrill toward her. Merrill had never actually had a lover. Most of her clan had grown up frightened of her, and Hawke had turned her away when push came to shove. She and Hawke had spent one night together, and it was an amazing one. Merrill wanted it to mean the world, but Hawke had said it meant nothing. Okay, she hadn’t said it had meant nothing, but that’s what Merrill felt like.

It felt good to be kissed. Merrill kissed Maren back, deepening the kiss the way she had learned Hawke had like to be kissed the one night they had spent together.

Maren’s body seemed to be reacting without her mind’s permission, but when Merrill kissed her back she felt a tingle in her core. She felt really alive, and she felt like nothing going on in the gossip in the clan seemed important anymore, just kissing Merrill in that moment.

Maren’s red hair was short, but neat. Merrill ran her hair threw it, the way Hawke had ran her hand through Merrill’s. Merrill remembered she liked the way it felt. Maren must have liked it too, because she felt Maren’s body give into the kissing even more. Relaxing her body into Merrill’s. They were at an odd position when they began kissing, essentially kneeling.

Merrill legs were getting tired, but she didn’t want to stop kissing Maren. She wanted to stay safe and warm in the moment. She stretched out her body slowly laying down and to her surprise Maren followed her. Maren shrugged off her shield and Merrill felt her weight on top of her.

Both women were afraid to break the moment. They might never go back to it. Neither wanted it to end, though neither really knew where it was going. Merrill lifted her leg and it came up between Maren’s legs. When Maren felt Merrill’s thigh touch her small clothes now damn and hot she let out an unconscious moan. Merrill might have only had one night with Hawke, but she knew how to please Hawke she wondered if it would be the same with Maren.

Merrill was finding her lost in the heady perfume of fresh sex. She slipped her small hand past the warrior’s belt and pants into her small clothes and Maren gave out a muffled cry when she touched her. She found her hot and slick. Her tender bud was pulsing under Merrill’s fingers. Both women were inexperienced, but both were very turned on. Merrill let a finger slip inside Maren and she could hear her breathing catch. Maren’s tight wall’s gripped her finger even tighter and she stifled a moan. She didn’t want to wake the rest of the clan, but she really didn’t care too much either. She wanted to touch Merrill they way Merrill was touching her.

Maren was no mage, but this felt like magic.

Maren wasn’t far from wrong.

The attraction was real, and had always been there, but something felt like it was guiding this. Exciting this. She couldn’t think about it too much. She slipped her hand between the mage’s legs and Merrill bit her lip. She didn’t feel anything they were doing was wrong, but she would rather it be private.

Merrill was slick and hot. She almost came undone as Maren’s first touch. It was all so unexpected. It all felt so amazing. Like so many things near Kirkwall, there was more going on that what met the eye.

Merrill gently pulled her finger out of Maren and it was wet and instantly became cold where the fall breeze hit it except for the tip, which continued to stroke Maren’s sensitive bud. Maren had never chosen to share pleasure with another, and it took almost nothing before she had completely lost herself to Merrill rhythm.

Maren withdrew her hand and grabbed Merrill by the shoulder’s as she came unexpectedly. She didn’t want anything to stop, but it felt so incredible and then overwhelming. She gave a short shriek before biting her lip trying to be quiet. Merrill felt amazing under her. Everything felt amazing. She’d never had an orgasm before, she had nothing to compare it to, it felt the gods had chosen her for something, her stomach and mind felt like a million butterflies, there were sheets of white before her eyes, and then she started to be able to catch her breath. She and Merrill hadn’t even spoken in the three years Merrill had been gone from the clan and she was having sex with her. Yes, sex. She had just had sex with her, and she knew everything was about to get really awkward. Maren didn’t want it to; she did the only thing she could think to do.

She kissed Merrill on lips and kissed her deeply with her tongue the way she had just been kissed by Merrill.

Merrill moaned even more excited by her fellow elf’s orgasm. Maren had never done anything, but in the clan there was little privacy. She had watch other men and women kiss a woman down there. She thought it looked like it must feel pretty amazing. She’s always wanted to try it. She hoped Merrill wouldn’t mind.

When Maren broke off the kiss and started heading south down Merrill’s body Merrill didn’t know what to think. It was easier not to think. The next think she knew she felt her skin exposed to the cold and Maren was prying her legs apart.

The first thing she felt was Maren’s tongue touching her, tasting her and she could barely believe it. It felt amazing. Maren’s kisses were nothing compared to this. She had to know of it were real. She ran her fingers through the short read hair of the woman between her legs, and that just spurred Maren on, it was the approval she had been looking for.

Merrill tasted incredible. Every time she licked her and lapped at her hardened clit Merrill’s body jerked and Merrill moaned. It felt amazing to have a woman in her mouth. Maren had never had any interest in the clan’s men, but she’s never caught the attention of one of the women. It seemed to have a drastically different effect on her body.

She slowly lapped at the tiny hard knot that seemed to be throbbing between Merrill’s legs. The more her tongue ran over Merrill the wetter the mage got, and it wasn’t from all the licking. She felt amazing. She was curious if Merrill would like it if she touched her inside the way Merrill had touched Maren. She slowly stroked one of her fingers near Merrill’s entrance, and worked up the courage to push inside of her.

Merrill immediately kicked her hips forward and lifted herself into the air. She didn’t mean to, but whatever Maren was doing felt astonishing. It was mind-blowing.

Maren was much more timid than Hawke had been, but her soft touch seemed to send her over the edge even quicker. Merrill chocked on the air as she came and Maren came up to catch Merrill’s mouth with her own.

Merrill could taste herself on Maren. Considering everything that just happened it just felt more exciting. Merrill’s orgasm was quicker and instantly overpowering. As she started to catch her breath she looked at Maren fin the eye or the first time since everything started.

As luck would have it she did the one thing Maren needed her to do. She pulled her beside her on the ground, wrapped her up in her arms and kissed her. She kissed her until she could feel sleep begin to pull at her eyes.

Exhausted from the day Merrill rolled over on her back. She should have already been on her way back to Isabela, but everyone had been right there was nothing she could do or she would have done it. Aveline had already gone to get Anders, and she had failed to get Marethari’s help.

She felt a warm body curl up next to her and a soft head lay on her shoulder. Everything was too much and she just started to cry, silently. Tears slipped from her eyes and straight down behind her ears leaving a warm trail that instantly cooled.

Maren had never had a lover, but she did remember before everything began Merrill had been worried about her friend. She caught a tear with her finger.

“Are you alright?” It was all Maren could think of to say. Merrill thought about a thousand different answers that flew in and out of her head. She waited so long thinking of an answer that Maren moved over to kiss her to see what she would do.
She kissed her back with the slightly salty taste of tears.

“Should I get us…you a bedroll? I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say.” Maren said. She was confused, and practically anything Merrill could come up with was going to hurt her in her emotionally vulnerable position.

“Just stay here with me until the morning. Stay here until I need to leave.” Merrill said it as a statement, but it was more of a question.

Practically anything she said would have hurt Maren except for that. There was a blanket not far from where Maren had been tending guard duty. The duty had been optional, and Maren had decided to opt out about an hour ago. She guessed it had been an hour. Merrill shifted back into her clothes and Maren laid back down covering them both with a blanket. Perhaps everything would be gone tomorrow, but they could have this right now tonight.

Maren watched from Merrill’s shoulder as the mage fell asleep and her arm around her went slack. She decided she liked watching Merrill sleep. She thought, if Merrill didn’t mind, she would return to the human’s camp tomorrow to make sure Merrill made it safely.

She hoped Merrill wouldn’t mind.

Chapter Text

Aveline had left her new shield at Ander’s place, which was a shame since she now wanted to use it to bash in his head so he would shut up and quit whining. He never ran out of things to mope and groan about. She supposed she should feel lucky he wasn’t in one of his raving moods, but Justice didn’t drag ass and need to be constantly prodded into moving faster.

“All I’m saying is if she had brought me to begin with this wouldn’t be an issue now.”

“Well, she didn’t, and I’m sure she would prefer it if Isabela didn’t die because you felt like moping.” Aveline was setting the pace and Anders was keeping up, but leaning heavily on his staff. He was tall, handsome, and had a bedraggled wet puppy charm that worked on many, but not on Aveline, and much to his chagrin, not on Hawke.

Hawke only took it as far as flirting. When Anders had taken the flirting a little too seriously she had closed that door years ago, but left it open for Isabela and that had really pissed him off.

Isabela, he scoffed at the thought. What did that slutty little pirate wench have that he didn’t? Maybe it was the absence of sharing his body with a second soul that was the turn off. Still, he would have never run off and left Hawke alone and scuttled back after three years. Three years she had run off, and Isabela was right there beside Hawke as though it had never happened, and Hawke was allowing it.

She had to see reason.

This was ridiculous.

He would’ve treated Hawke differently.

“I’m not moping.” Anders eventually responded after moping.

“If you take any longer she’ll die of old age.” Aveline cut a look backwards, but Anders was keeping up.

“Perhaps Isabela has lost her edge or she wouldn’t need healing.” Anders retorted.

“Why don’t you heal her, then you two can spar and you can tell me what you think of her wit with her blades. In fact, why don’t you both do it in front of Hawke so you can both appear equally desperate.” Aveline was annoyed. All Anders topics of conversations ended with him brooding or lashing out in a “mage rant”. At least the Hawke rants weren’t as loud.

“She couldn’t get close enough against a mage, and even if she could…” Anders started what was going to be another long prattling speech. Aveline could feel it in her bones.

“Hawke didn’t pick you.” Aveline turned around and snapped at him.

“I bed your pardon.” Anders at least tried to appear surprised and offended, he fell short of both in believability. He really couldn’t do ‘aghast’.

“Hawke, all those years ago, wanted something else. She didn’t pick you. You wanted something exclusive, Isabel wanted anything but. You fell for Hawke. Isabela never meant to. She’s a slattern, yet she’s never gone behind Hawke’s back, nor do I think she ever would. You’re pissed. I get it, but her dying because you’re too busy whining isn’t going to win you any awards.”

“You don’t pick who you love, like you pick your friends. Hawke chose you as a friend, as she chose me as a friend. She chose us; we chose her. Why does she lead the merry band of misfits instead of Varric or me?” Aveline asked narrowing her eyes.

“Because, she’s the only one who can lead.” Aveline said. “She’s the one who pulled us together. We all do more good than bad because of her. Kirkwall benefits, and everyone looks the other way.”

“I know she helps everyone. I don’t need a lecture.” Anders jaw muscle flexed as it clenched.

“You do. It’s not about you. It’s not about you and Hawke. It’s not about you and Isabela, or who is a better person. Isabela and Hawke just happened. For reasons, Maker only knows, they make each other happy in their own way. If we agree on nothing else, you and I will agree on one thing. After everything Hawke has been through, she deserves a chance to be happy. She has no family, except for Bethany, and thank you for saving her, but she’s a Grey Warden. You know the life she has, and it doesn’t involve Hawke.”

“I saved her for Hawke.” Anders said.

“And Hawke will be grateful beyond words for the rest of her life and you know that. Whether you hate her or not, heal Isabela. Hawke deserves some slight chance at happiness. Isabela is hardly a guarantee, but if she dies now after Hawke drug herself through the last three years…what do you think will happen?” Aveline stopped and turned to face Anders. Though she was much shorter, he shifted his weight under her authority.

“She would go on like everyone else.” Anders answered flatly.

“Everyone has a breaking point. Hawke is at hers. Work your miracle if you can, or mark my words, they will both die.”

“If I can? Have you seen me fail at a healing not caused by trauma?” Anders scoffed.

“Have you ever seen a demon mouth eating a woman alive?” Aveline turned and started quickly back up the trail.

“No.” Anders started after her. “I’ll do it for Hawke.”

“All the worthwhile things you do, you do for Hawke.” Aveline was starting to chafe under the gore that was rubbing against the leather straps of her shield and armor that had been caked on and cooked under the hot sun.

“How much further?” Anders asked.

“Maybe an hour if we hurry.” It’s just above that cliff. It would put them at almost midday.

“I don’t think your going to make it in an hour.” A large bearded mercenary casually said as he leaned against a tree some 25 yards away.

The two party members had been lost in conversation and were taken by surprise when the Slavers stepped out of the trees. There was a great deal of cover, and they had cleared the area yesterday when they crossed through it.

Aveline took in a deep breath.

Guess they hadn’t cleared it enough. There were at least ten that had come out from their cover. There could be more.

“A mage healer could fetch a high price. A magister would pay nicely for that. A practical woman with a shield, well that might be more fun to keep for just me and the boys.”

Anders eyes glowed in fury. He started to draw power for a spell. Five more faces popped into view.

“Wait.” Aveline said to everyone.

***

Hawke had gotten up near dawn. She was quiet, though she didn’t know how quiet she needed to be. She didn’t know if Isabel would even rouse. The mouth on her back had grown larger and seemed to be eating away at fresh pink muscle. Nothing she did seemed to help. Anything she did it attempted to bite at, and if she agitated it, it seemed to start eating more quickly.

Isabela’s breathing was shallow, but her pulse was steady for now. The morning hours were slipping away. Since Marethari hadn’t come early with Merrill she assumed they had run into trouble or the Keeper wasn’t helping. The Clan leader wasn’t exactly a safe bet, but she was worth a try.

The fire was out and Hawke had rations if Isabela woke.

Hawke was worried, and indecision wasn’t something she suffered from often.

She dipped a cloth in some of her cool drinking water rations. She put it on Isabela’s forehead. Isabela moaned and rolled around in her sleep, unconsciousness. Hawke didn’t know.

The Isabela she knew would have been up hours ago.

Her color was wrong. She was pasty and her breathing was getting ragged. She hadn’t deliberately tried to wake Isabela yet.

If Marethari wasn’t there yet, it was a safe bet she wasn’t coming. She could carry Isabela and start down the path she knew would meet up with Aveline and Anders coming from Kirkwall. She could leave her gear except for her sword and probably make decent time, but carrying a wounded woman alone, even during daylight hours wasn’t exactly ideal.

They were safe where they were, but they were running out of time.

“Isabela.” Hawke said gently shaking her slightly as she knelt beside her. Isabela moaned, but didn’t wake. “Bela” she said louder and shook her a bit harder. It didn’t seem like she would rouse easily.

“Hopefully, you’ll forgive me for this later.” She breathed into her ear and gently kissed her on the lips. Her eyes fluttered slightly but she remained unconscious.

Hawke backhanded her. Hard. In a different time and situation it would have felt good. Actually it could have been fun in several different scenarios she could run through her head.

Isabela gasped, and awoke with a slight shriek and in a flash of silver had a dagger to Hawke’s neck.

“That’s my girl.” Hawke smiled softly. She took the dagger from her gently smiling.

“You enjoyed that.” Isabela moaned. “Dammit” she yelled reaching around to her back.

“Leave it. You’ll just make it worse. Actually, you might piss it off.” Hawke said trying to look sympathetic. Even though the situation was dire she had missed Isabela terribly, even her cranky temper up to and including a knife to the throat.

“I still don’t want to know, do I?” Isabela struggled to get up.

“Wait.” Hawke said sitting next to her. “And nope, you don’t wanna know.”

“You enjoyed that.” Isabela said rubbing her face.

“Which part, the slap or the dagger? Because you were just as likely to enjoy both.” Hawke smiled. Her blue eyes smiled with her. How Isabela had missed that smile. Maker she felt like hell, but those smiling blue eyes made hell a bit more tolerable. She rumpled Hawke’s always-misbehaving hair and offered her a chaste kiss. She hadn’t intended for it to be so chaste, but that damn thing on her back--hurt.

Hawke smile flickered to worry, but she covered it quickly. “Well today you get something you always wanted.”

“A foursome of my choosing?” Isabela smiled ruefully.

“You always got that often enough, and it’s no where near your birthday. Nope, something new.” Hawke said standing and swiping the dirt off her armor, though the effort was mostly in vain.

“Your virginity.” Isabela laughed.

“Well if you’re going to dream, dream big to impossible.” Hawke laughed. Even life or death situations with Isabela had more emotions in them than just fear.

Isabela felt more alive dying than she had felt living the last 3 years without Hawke. Isabela struggled to try and get up. Hawke swooped her up and carried her on her shoulder.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“Today, I get to sweep you off your feet, and you get to enjoy the ride.” Hawke kicked the loose dagger on the ground up with a practiced foot into her hand barely grabbing it with a lucky shot finger grip at the hilt.

“That was pure luck.” Isabela said.

“Pure talent.” Hawke said. Offering Isabela her third dagger.

“You can’t really expect me to let you carry me.” Isabela seemed indignant, but was pleased at all the attention, though her back was screaming in pain.

“Well, we’ve got to get you help and, no doubt, Anders is dragging ass. I think if you walk your going to make it worse. So, I can carry you, or leave you here to die. So you want a gorgeous fabulous woman carrying you off to play hero, or die here bored in the dirt?” Hawke started walking headed toward the next clearing.

“Seriously. These are my choices?” Isabela started to wiggle, but her back screamed and she let out a small shriek.

“I’m guessing by that little scream, yes, those are your two choices.” Hawke stabilized her legs as they began the trek down Sundermount.

“Great so when do we meet up with this gorgeous fabulous woman that’s going to carry me down the mountain?” Isabela asked. She got the response she expected Hawke smacked her ass and laughed.

“Dying would really be bad timing. Any chance of stopping to have sex?” Isabela asked.

“Nope.” Hawke said shuffling down an embankment.

“Damn. Now you have me worried.” Isabela sighed.

“Sorry. I’d rather take the chance at a lot more sex than one last fuck.”

“Picky. Typical. Then again, a lot more sex sounds pretty good.”

“Yeah, now we just got to get that demon mouth off your back.” Hawke stated.

“Tell me your fucking kidding me.” Isabela just felt reality slap her in the face and it didn’t feel good.

“Isabela, think how much it would take for me to carry you down a mountain. You should be glad it’s only a demon mouth.”

“Oddly, that might have made me feel better.”

***

Maren and Merrill arrived where the humans had camped the night before. The embers from the fire were still hot. Hawke must have just broken camp.

Maren was checking the trail. “It’s one set of footprints. Heavy. Dragging. Hawke, is it?”

Merrill had been filling in Maren on bits and pieces of her life as they travelled to the campsite. Merrill knew so many fascinating things. “They’re still hot.” Merrill said.
“They can’t be far.”

“Let’s go then.” Maren indicated toward the trail.

Merrill hung back. “You don’t have to come.”

“I don’t understand.” Maren said blinking.

“You don’t have to come. You’re not obligated to come. You said you’d come to the camp, and you did. I don’t want you to feel like you have to come with me.” Merrill shifted her focus to the embers buried in the dirt and kicked at them uncomfortably.

“Do you not want me to come?” Maren asked. They hadn’t really talked about anything. Especially about anything that had happened. It hadn’t been uncomfortable until now. Merrill had just talked about her life in Kirkwall and her adventures with Hawke; Maren had mostly been listening.

All those adventures and the way Merrill had been talking about Hawke…wait she was foolish…”I should go”…

Merrill stopped her as she started to pass. “Do you want to go?”

“I don’t understand. Don’t you want me to go? Aren’t you with Hawke?” Maren blurted out without thinking.

Merrill’s look changed from complete concern to utter amusement. “No.” She laughed. “Hawke and I…no…Hawke is with Isabela…at least I think they are trying to work it out…I just meant, I didn’t want you to feel obligated if you didn’t want to come, but I would like it if you did, but I would understand if you didn’t, I’m not really one of the clan anymore. Not really. I know people would talk. I know I was never very popular and I wouldn’t want you to suffer for it…I just…”

Maren looked bewildered and Merrill sighed. “I always do this. I just talk, and talk, and talk, and make no sense. Sometimes I should just stop talking.” Merrill lifted Meran’s chin with her fingers and kissed her gently. She really didn’t know how her fellow elf would respond after last night.

Maren immediately wrapped her arms around Merrill and kissed her back with abandon. There was a great deal of passion and lust, but there was a glimmer of something else too. Maybe a sincere interest. Merrill pulled back and looked at Maren with those incredibly expressive eyes. They were saying so much, she couldn’t read it all, but she liked the part she could read.

“I have to go find my friends. Help if I can. Do what I can. This…whatever this is…I…I don’t know what it means…” when she had asked Hawke what it had meant she had not liked the answer, though now that she thought about it, she might have blown it out of proportion. Could she still have feelings for Hawke, but have feelings for Maren? At least be curious about Maren?

Maren had come out of nowhere. What had happened…well it was wonderful, but it seemed like it came out of nowhere…something felt like it was behind it. It didn’t have anything to do with Maren. She felt caught in the middle of something, but she’d like to try the sex again.

Maren was hanging on her every word, the way she had hung on Hawke’s. “I’d like this to continue. Us to continue, if there is an us. See if there is an us. I need to go. If you don’t come with me I understand, but if you want more…I think I do to.”

Merrill wasn’t quite ready for Maren’s enthusiastic reaction. Maren knocked her to the ground kissing her. If her friends weren’t in danger she wouldn’t have gotten up from the ground anytime soon. Maren moved over and kissed her neck sending goose bumps down the right side of her body, and instantly she could feel herself getting wet and a butterfly tickle at her core.

She did want this, but not now.

Well she did want it now, but she couldn’t have it now.

Dammit.

“I have to go. Do you want to come with me?” Merrill had pulled back from Maren enough to get her attention. Maren’s thoughts were thick with lust and the smell of fresh sex almost left her free from thoughts outside carnal ones. She knew if she just touched Merrill…what was she thinking? Merrill needed to find her friends and had invited her along. She shook her head to clear it.

“Let’s find your friends.” She picked up her shield and started on their trail with the same determination as she had just had at initiating sex. Well, at least she gave everything her full attention. Merrill started to follow from behind her. Something seemed off. She didn’t know if it was Sundermount, her friends, or what, but not everything was what it was supposed to be.

***

Hawke had heard the rustling up ahead and put Isabela down. The Rivani was sweating profusely and her color wasn’t looking very good, she had been slipping in and out of consciousness.

She could see Aveline in the distance, but there were a good 20 slavers and mercs and 3 of them that were able bodied. Hawke had been holding position for a few minutes trying to figure out what to do. Surprise was her only advantage. She needed time, but she didn’t think Isabela had much in the way of that.

“I don’t think you realize your position.” Aveline said buying time.

“What? Guard Captain Aveline? You think I didn’t know who you were? This was a straight up easy job, I just didn’t expect to get a mage out of it.” The large sweaty slaver laughed. “You’ve made your fair share of enemies. At least one with enough coin to pay my price. Too bad your friend Hawke isn’t here. Me and my boys were looking forward to that bit of fun.”

“That’s the thing about fun.” A woman’s voice spoke evenly from behind the large slaver with the sweaty dirt ring around his neck. He smelled as putrid as he looked. “Since your not fun, fun wants no part of you.” Before he could turn Isabela slit his throat and blood spray began to paint the trees.

Anders shot out a spell and all the enemies around him slowed leaving time for Aveline to start making quick work of them. Anders could hear the crack of an ice spell being cast. They had a mage of their own. Damn.

Merrill sprayed and froze a swath of men from the north. She had an elf with her. They were making quick work of the men. Everyone was too far away for him to heal except Aveline. He would just have to keep casting and keep her in fighting shape. There were too many. They were going to be overwhelmed by numbers. Merrill was holding her own, but there were more to the south. Besides the fewer that lived, the fewer they had to share the profits with.

Anders had just cast and saw an archer he had just missed drawing back full. There was nothing he could do. He wasn’t aiming to kill, but they were already on the verge of being overrun.

Right before he was about to release the arrow a giant sword cleaved him in half. Behind him in a spray of blood Hawke was cutting a bloody swathe to them. They were being destroyed from the outside in and the inside out.

Some kind of demon appeared near where their leader’s body had fallen.

Once the battle became 2 to 1 the mercs and slavers started running. Their reputation preceded them it seemed. Normally, Hawke would give chase, but not this time.

Hawke ran over to where the leader was slain. The demon at its full height roared. Whatever had been in Isabela decided to jump to a fresh unoccupied body.

The giant gaping mouth stood at the center of what had to be a 12-foot demon.

Hawke could see Isabela’s body slumped on the ground. Dammit she couldn’t see if she was breathing. There was a giant whole where the mouth had been and blood was oozing out of it, but it appeared to have left Isabela, but did it leave her alive?

The demon was huge. Hawke’s head barely reached its paunch belly.

She swung her sword with all the centrifugal force she could muster and embedded it deeply into its thick thigh. It roared an unhinged scream of pain and backhanded Hawke into a tree with a sickening thud. Hawke heard something crack. She hoped it was just her ribs. She felt as though a thousand pillows had hit her. That kind of hit was the worst. If you couldn’t feel the pain, you were in serious trouble.

Hawke could taste the blood fresh spewing from her mouth as she coughed. Maybe a rib had punctured a lung.

Merrill tried a spell, but it bounced off the demon, seemingly annoying it. It turned to finish off Hawke. An elf with a sword and board cut what should have been an Achilles tendon, if it were human, from behind.

It turned and crumpled a bit. It’s movement crippled a bit. When it’s clawed hand sent the elf flying a familiar sounding-sickening thud followed.

This was not going well.

An even louder scream pierced the air, and the demon stopped. A dragon was circling. Suddenly the green canopy above them was on fire. The beast landed roughly near the demon, which had begun to retreat.

The warrior elf’s body was at an unnatural angel. There might not be anything for a mage to fix, then again, Hawke might not last much longer either.

Smoke and flame encircled the dragon going into a tighter and tighter circle until it was too small for an animal to exit. Instead Asha'bellanar, stood tall her white hair staunch against the blood everywhere.

She looked at the demon who gave a scream that rattled Thedas.

“You have made me late for my appointment. This is not going to go well for any of us.” The Witch of the Wilds said adjusting her greave.

Chapter Text

Chapter 6

Hawke looked up and down endless rows of giant mirrors, eluvians, her voice and steps seemed to echo a second after they should have made noise. This place made no sense, nor did how she got here.

“Hello” Hawke cupped her hands to her mouth. She had already started to move her hands away when the voice finally started.

Everything seemed dark, billowy, unreal, and left her with a clammy uncomfortable cold feeling. What had she just been doing? There was a demon…maybe something that came from Isabela’s wound.

Where was Isabela? Was she all right? Where was she?

“Isabela.” Hawke shouted. Again, the delay, and again the annoyance grated on her last nerve. “Isabela.” Hawke spun in a circle looking for movement from anywhere.

“I assure you. If she were here yet, she couldn’t miss that call.” Flemeth reappeared next to Hawke, wiggling her finger in her ear in protest of Hawke’s volume.

“Where is she?”

“What good would it be to know where she is, if you don’t know where you are?”

“Fine. How is she?”

“A better question. Dead. Well almost. She was dead. She got better, I made sure of that. She wasn’t very dead. Just for a second, but you see I couldn’t let that happen, because I need you. History isn’t done with you yet. In order for history to have you, it seems you need Isabela, at least for the moment. This debt you have incurred…actually is on the house...a rarity, but sometimes necessary.” Flemeth’s husky voice was filled with bemusement. She seemed enamored with her armor in this form. She appeared to be constantly be looking at herself, you’d think she’s just use a mirror, Hawke thought to herself.

“They aren’t those kind of mirrors, and before you ask it, no, I don’t read minds. I read the obvious.” Flemeth’s self-amusement always had lousy timing around high stakes.

“Can I see her?” Flemeth pointed to an Eluvian that had begun to glow. Isabela’s form looked like it was coming crashing through it sideways. The mirror was close to where Hawke was standing, she rushed over to it in time for Isabela to be deposited at her feet.

Hawke knelt down, and gathered Isabela to her. Her body was warm, and the wound where the mouth was had healed and was gone. Isabela moaned in a semi-conscious fashion.

“Bela.” Hawke said holding her firmly by the shoulders. “Bela.” she said a bit louder, shaking her very lightly.

The once sweat drenched cloth she wore on her head had dried. She looked peaceful. She managed to stop her head from free floating and tried to focus on Hawke. “Are you real?” Isabela asked Hawke in a sleepy uncertain voice.

Hawke caught the Rivani’s lips with her own. Isabela had full rich warm lips. They were soft to the touch. Hawke wanted to make sure she wasn’t hallucinating either. She pulled her hand lightly up to brush off the forelock of hair as she kissed Isabela. She let her hand pull back into her long hair and tangle in it as she deepened the kiss, Isabela responded instinctively kissing Hawke back and wrapping her hands in the small of Hawke’s back pulling her closer to her.

Hawke moaned at the familiar kiss. How much she had missed Isabela. It had hurt so much when she was gone. Now that she was back…well, there was nothing keeping her from leaving again anytime she wanted.

“No.” Isabela said, as if reading her thoughts. “This time I stay with you until you say go.”

Hawke looked into Isabela’s honey-brown eyes. She could see everything she ever wanted in them.

Desire, heavily mixed with love.

It was delicious and decadent.

Was it even real?

“She’s not really here. Not completely, physically, then again, neither are you. But lest you be sad, the things you see and feel here are real, as are her feelings for you. This I didn’t see coming, fate is sneaky that way. Lucky, I happened to be in the neighborhood. Demon mouths don’t go away on their own. Freak accident, but a deadly one, usually. This story has an usually happy ending.

Well…most everyone lives anyway.” Flemeth paused for effect. ”That’s a good start.”

“Where are we?” Hawke looked up at the Witch of the Wilds catching her gaze directly in her eye. Flemeth always laughed at the fearless, for those were the ones who were truly to be reckoned with, but Hawke’s gaze was broken by Isabela’s cough.

The pirate sat up slowly and rubbed her eyes as if just coming to. Hawke reached down for a familiar skin of water she kept on her for travel and found it full. It shouldn’t have been, but she didn’t question it and gave it to Isabela who took it gratefully.

This place didn’t make sense.

Isabela wiped mouth with the back of her hand absently. The soot from her hand being cleansed by the fresh water and the clean breath.

The Rivani was shaky, but found Hawke’s shoulder sturdy and strong as usual when she leaned forward trying to get up.

The abrupt shift in weight didn’t even budge Hawke Isabela just fell against her in a familiar way immobilizing way.

Hawke took her by the shoulders and slowly pushed her back to a sitting position. The Pirate gave up protesting early. Hawke moved behind her and she curled up in her arms. Tired for the moment. Letting Hawke hold her, holding her making her feel weightless.

Hawke felt so warm. Her frame was small, wiry, but she radiated an immense heat like a human blanket; one Isabela was more than happy to snuggle up in and lean against.

“Where are we?” Hawke repeated, this time more softly: happier, quieter, to be with Isabela, if only for a moment.

“It is a sensible question, but without a sensible answer. We are between worlds. You, Isabela, and the young girl “of the people” Maren, I think her name was, (Flemeth couldn’t resist doing air quotes) were about to cross-over from the world of the living into the world after…that can’t happen, not-just-yet. Thedas still needs you. Your job is not done. Your lives are spared but at the cost of the universe using them, and you to alter history, again, though to you, you haven’t done it yet. It doesn’t have to be linear to you. Actually, it doesn’t even have to make sense to you, which is lucky, because it doesn’t make that much sense even to those of us in the know.”

“I don’t understand…” Hawke started.

Flemeth waved her off with her hand.

You needn’t have too. Your bodies: Isabela’s, Maren’s and yours, are still on the mountain. You’re in varying degrees of injury. I needed a placed to put your consciousness somewhere while I do a bit of healing. It wouldn’t do me any good to save you, if you died from the pain.”

Maren groaned on the ground not too far from them.

“It’s more private than you think. The other girl lost consciousness. She might be difficult for even me to wake. The two of you have little time, as you are well aware of, I suggest you take advantage of that time. You never know much you have left, or how much it’s going to hurt when you get back…if you get back. I’m fairly certain of you.” The Witch said pointing at Hawke. “The others…well…I’ll do my best…but I’d enjoy the sex now just in case.”

“A woman after my own heart.” Isabela snorted.

“That I very much doubt.” Flemeth laughed.

“Honestly, I don’t know if the sex is more romantic or just pragmatic at this point,” Flemeth seemed to take a moment to take care to consider this point, “but I do think based on lust, it should be a great deal of fun. Don’t waste time ladies. Even when after you make it back, it’s going to hurt for a good long while. I suggest you enjoy it, now. I do remember such pleasures. At least other women should enjoy them.”

Flemeth tapped an Eluvian near Hawke; it showed the blood-spattered field on which they just fought. Hawke could see, as if through a window, how broken and banged up her body was. “You look in better shape than your girlfriend, if it makes you feel any better. Of course, it’s going to hurt when you go back in to your body. That much I can tell you. I’ve been in enough of them to know. Bodies that is.” Flemeth laughed haughtily.

Isabela looked around. “Why do I think we wouldn’t be laughing at the same joke?”

“You might be smarter than I give you credit for.” Flemeth laughed and continued on, “Your pirate queen is lucky to have you.”

Flemeth pointed to the Eluvian where the battlefield stood. “Skilled with a blade, too, always handy. She’ll pull through.”

“I am right here, you know.” Isabela said.

“Sort of.” Flemeth smirked. “The two of you, will remain here for a bit, while I finish up doctoring you up on the other side.”

“I don’t know how long you have here. Your bodies are alive, but at least one is in poor condition. No idea how poor a condition. I don’t know how much of the damage can be reversed. We shall see what I can do, and time will tell the rest.

Please. Make yourselves at home. Don’t get too comfy though. You’re not staying. People were never meant to stay here for longer than a brief respite. Something Morrigan had to be reminded that. Perhaps a rushed hello or a brief goodbye. Make good use of your time.”

Flemeth turned to face the Eluvian as though she were about to take flight. She paused and turned cocking her head as she so like to do when trying to appear both curious and enchanting at the same time. “I suggest you two take time to enjoy this this. You don’t know how much or little time you will have here or on the other side.”

Flemeth turned with her usually flamboyance and shot a fireball she had just summoned to her hand at the mirror. For a moment, flames engulfed the Eluvian, and those flames fell away exposing a blue-green energy pulsating gently with Flemeth through the mirror. Her head held high, her long white hair buoyant with energy she sached as she entered the mirror that had just shown the battleground they had just come from.

Their bodies and their friends were now out of the view of the mirror.

With her body out of view Hawke felt different not being able to gaze down on her crumpled body with the short cropped mussed dark hair.

Hawke felt like this place was real and she was really in it. She had been leaning on her wrist and her warm dulled hand had fallen asleep even amongst the nerves crying in pain where she had embedded the soft skin of her palm against a cement crack on the ground/sidewalk she was sitting on.

She felt a familiar touch and rough warm hand slide gently up and down her arm from behind. Even the callouses from lock picking were familiar. Hawke looked back to find Isabela looking very alive, and a little coy with her bright brown eyes.

Isabela laughed. “I have no idea what that crazy witch is on about, but I can tell you, whatever just happened wasn’t so bad if the universe is giving me a last minute bootycall; I’m afraid I’m going to have to say yes.”

Hawke was shocked and started to respond, but Isabela was sincere in her statement as she was in her laughter at Hawke’s surprise in her frankness. It’s not like they were in the Chantry, though that might be fun…to do it in the Chantry sometime. Of course, she didn’t know why she would walk into a Chantry other than to have sex in one. Kill bad people? Rob a bad one? Have sex in one?

These are probably not on the top five reasons other people visited the Chantry, but other people weren’t Isabela.

Isabela pushed Hawke closer. She wanted to breathe something into her ear, but couldn’t think of anything to say. Isabela’s breath on Hawke’s ear was enough to elicit a reaction.

Hawke caught herself gasping in a quick breath: her nipple was instantly hard, and her left side of her body was on alert and covered in goose bumps. She swore it felt like her ear was ringing.

During their constant game of cat and mouse, sex and no sex, Hawke hadn’t really been on the recipient end of sex. She had been in complete control the whole time. Isabela hadn’t minded…until now. Isabela had lied to herself; from the minute she set foot back in Kirkwall. She thought she had come back to Kirkwall for the sex, so getting as much sex from Hawke as possible seemed logical.

She even accepted the lie until now. Maybe she even accepted it in her outside voice, but her inside voice told her something different.

Hawke had sealed the deal and made her fall in love with her. Isabela was going precisely nowhere, but Isabela had nothing like that kind of a confirmation from Hawke.

Isabela needed Hawke to want her. To need her. To beg for her. When Isabela let her come, she wanted it to be with Isabela’s name trembling on her lips.

Isabela moved in and pushed upper body soft, but firmly against Hawke’s. When Hawke started to speak and point her finger in Isabela’s face, Isabela hooked her thumb around Hawke’s on thumb and pulled back and all the way up near her neck. Hawke yelped in surprise when Isabela extended a tad too far and Hawke let go.

The little game had been intentional.

“I’ve missed you so much, Bela. It hurt. I didn’t want it to hurt again. I still don’t. But…”Hawke started.

“But, is all I need. Let me make it up to you Hawke. I owe you at least that much, at least.”

Isabela pushed her lover backwards and smoothly moved on top of her. For Hawke it had been a while since she had been the sole center of attention so when Isabela reached down and effortlessly pushed past her small clothes for one quick stroke of her clit Hawke was completely taken by surprise and an instant later soaking wet and slick with her own come.

“I owe you a lot more. I’ll keep making it up to you if you let me.”

When Isabela went to stroke her a second time it was almost like touching another woman. Hawke’s clit was swollen with excitement and she was dripping wet to the brim.

Isabela had meant the second stroke to have been just as quick as the first.

She had just wanted to toy with Hawke for now.

But when she felt how wet, hot, slick Hawke had gotten, how her whole body shook at her touch, she pushed Hawke’s panties out of her way with her hand and slowly began to stroke her. She moved in close kissing her on the lips.

Hawke was too excited to last more than a few minutes, Isabela was pretty sure of that.

It had been far too long, and for once Isabela wasn’t going to tease her or deny her.

As Isabela pushed inside Hawke gently the way she knew Hawke liked to be touched she stifled cry of pleasure with her mouth pressed on top of hers.

“I don’t know what’s going to happen when she comes back.” Isabela whispered “Or we have to go back through the mirror or whatever, but…at least in my dream girl version…we have right here, right now, so let’s take advantage of that.” Isabela said pushing her body harder up against Hawke’s pulling her tighter. “Touch me.” Isabela whispered in Hawke’s ear. Hawke felt a surge of electricity surge through the left side of her body where Isabela had just purred, and shot through her core. She felt a thousand butterflies rush out and away.

It felt incredible to feel this whoosh of excitement to feel this way with another person. Too ache for them to touch you.

Hawke could feel a pull at her core and a sudden rush of wetness renew between her legs right by her tingling clit that was already aching again to be touched.

As if reading her mind, Isabela slipped her finger outside of Hawke. It was so hot, wet and tight inside her, but Isabela knew she wanted to be stroked, needed to be stroked, Hawke groaned as her lover set a slow steady rhythm swiping at her clit. It was almost hard to stroke her where she wanted her to, because Hawke was so slick. The Rivani would accidently move passed the spot.

Isabela pushed her lips against Hawke’s full ones, kissing her, parting her lips to deepen it with her tongue.

Hawke forgot everything in the universe in that moment but Isabela. She was all that existed. All that she wanted to exist. All that she needed to exist.

Hawke pushed passed Isabela’s waistband of her dagger and slid expertly below. Isabela seemed to have gotten a bit excited herself when she had been entering Hawke. That became clear to both women as soon as Hawke touched Isabela. Isabela almost came. Shocked she grabbed Hawke’s wrist and had her stop short for the moment. Hawke stopped and let her catch her breath.

Since both women were on short time, as it were, they both just smiled at each other. There was little point in disrobing for this round. Both women chose their preferred hand down past their lover’s small clothes. The whimpered and pulled each other close as they touched each other. Both were incredibly wet and a bundle of excited nerves.

Isabela pulled back and smiled and Hawke sweeping her eyes over Hawke’s face. “I guess we fuck like there is no tomorrow, because there is no tomorrow. Well, maybe more tomorrow.” Isabela reached down and stroked the back of Hawke’s free hand with her own free hand before taking it in her own hand.

On the odd occasion when Hawke liked to break out a toy, it would always free up someone’s hands during sex. Isabela had found a little trick she loved. Isabela always loved to feel Hawke’s hand, palm to palm when they were making love. No matter what was going on: stroking, licking, pounding, fucking, or screwing each others brains out, it was a touch of intimacy she had never shared with anyone else, just Hawke. It was a simple thing; so simple she thought Hawke probably didn’t notice.

She was wrong.

Hawke noticed.

Hawke had always noticed.

All Hawke had to do was stroke her thumb softly across Isabela palm and the pirate would close her eyes, involuntarily shutter and moan every time. If she did it when she was eating her, flicking her tongue across her swollen clit, gently sucking her bud in her mouth, or really anything, there would be a rush of slick wetness that would escape her entrance with a simple stroke of the palm. Nothing else would provide this intense a reaction short of orgasm.

Isabela was easily excited and naturally wet, or would get wet with little work on Hawke’s part. Isabela didn’t have it so easy with all her partners, but Hawke always knew how to excite her, and make her body react.

She knew it was a bit of intimacy she either never shared with anyone else, or had seldom shared with few. It was the closest thing Isabela had to showing love. What was interesting is that she had offered it to Hawke the first time they had been together.

In every three way or open setting they had been in, usually at Isabela’s behest, Isabela offered her hand to no one and took it away if someone tried to take it. It seemed hand-holding was something reserved just for Hawke, and as simple as that was, it was the most intimate thing Isabela had to offer Hawke.

It’s how Hawke read her intent.

Usually Isabela just wanted a fuck, but since she had been back…she had been more intimate—leaving herself vulnerable. She was taking chances with Hawke and putting everything she had on the line anytime they were alone together. Isabela didn’t know she had a tell; Hawke would never say a thing.

Both women were stroking each other and both were close to coming. Hot, slick, and wet, they smelled of fresh sex, it was almost too much. Hawke was trembling with desire. Really it was who blinked first. Sheer force of will had kept Hawke from coming so far, but she wouldn’t be able to hold out much longer. Isabela’s moans in her ear and touching her lover as she was being touched was driving her over the edge.

Isabela laced her fingers through Hawke’s with her freehand and began to inadvertently scream. Hawke needed to let go to come with her. It wasn’t going to be that hard, on the next stroke Hawke quit caring about stopping herself and let the world close in on black static and open on color. She realized she was chocking on air. At some point Isabela most of have finished her orgasm and Hawke was still going loud and long on hers.

Isabela looked pleased with herself, as she continued to stroke Hawke, and it felt incredible, just a white wash of pleasure. Hawke just kept feeling herself coming. She gripped Isabela’s hand closer.

Isabela rode through a nice orgasm herself, but this might have been the longest time she’s ever seen Hawke go. It felt incredible. Hawke felt incredible. These last crashing moments for Hawke felt amazing, but beyond the pleasure Hawke had looked Isabela with that amorous passion she had been missing so much. She would have denied it before, but now she knew, she missed having the one certain lover to spend her life with.

Her time with.

What was wrong with her?

Hawke was spent almost as soon as she finished. She fell asleep almost instantly and Isabela held her from behind. For those few moment if felt good to hold and be held.

Too bad it was only for a few moments…

***

The sky hurt.

Her mind hurt.

Her body hurt.

Everything hurt.

Maker, I think my hair hurts.

“She’s coming around.” Hawke recognized Anders voice.

Anders was doing some kind of spell. Healing, is what it looked like, but she felt like hell.

“What the hell happened.” Hawke felt the ache of her own throat as she spoke.

“Big demony thing.” Merrill started. “You fought it. It got mad. Well, it’s dead now, and you are better than you were.”

“Where’s Flemeth?” Hawke asked. “She could have given us a bit of warning you know. How is she?” Hawke indicated in Isabela’s general direction.

“Asha’bellanar? She isn’t here.” Merrill said.

“I was just talking to her before she left Isabela and I at this place with a bunch of Eluvians. Maren was there. Ask her.” Hawke waved her hand dismissively.

“How did you know my name? Or that I was with Merrill?” Maren asked. The elf shifted the weight from foot to foot. She was standing, but barely.

“About Isabela…” Aveline started.

“Yeah.” Hawke was listening.

She went to brush her rub an eyelash out of her eye. She could smell Isabela on her hand. How could she have been at the crossroads moments before and be here now. It didn’t make sense.

“We haven’t been able to wake her up.” Aveline looked at her leveling her eyes at her neutrally. Betraying nothing.

“I just saw Flemeth. I was just talking to her. I was just with Isabela…it sounds crazy…”

“It sounds crazy, because it is crazy.” Aveline said. “You were here. You’re banged up pretty badly; we all were.”

“What about that dragon that came through the…” the canopy above them was intact. Hawke knew what she saw though. Was it a dream? She had been with Isabela. Painfully, she got up and ignored the protests of the others, the all became background noise. Isabela was laying not far from where she had fallen. She was breathing. She was alive, but she was still, too still. The mouth of the demon was gone from her back. Anders, Aveline, everyone was trying to say something, they didn’t know…she hadn’t woken up…no one knew.

She heard a blood curdling piercing scream from overhead. She knew the sound of the Flemeth Dragon, she’d heard it enough for one lifetime.

Maybe dream and reality were a bit screwy right now, but she swore Isabela smelled of fresh sex. She could hear the giant flapping of the wings of the dragon overhead.

She kissed Isabela on instinct; it was a guess.

The good news was Isabela was alive. The bad news was she woke up screaming, and it didn’t seem like it was going to stop soon. She imagined it was the screaming in pain part Flemeth had warned them about.

What had she said? “Demon mouths don’t heal themselves? She happened to be in the neighborhood?

Strange machinations were at work. Well beyond the walls of Kirkwall and even Thedas. The Hero of Fereldon was caught up in things yet to come with the Inquisition, the problem was…time wasn’t going to wait around and be linear this time.

It was going to happen now.

A voice on the wind seemed to say it was good about an Anders yet to come; she would need him while she could still use him. That voice seemed to have the voice of a dragon.

Things were going strangely.

The main thrust of it was, they were about to get a great deal stranger.

Chapter Text

Chapter 7

The years rolled by in Kirkwall. Battle after battle—killer after killer, merchant, thief. It was a red mist mixed with lust, drink, friends, battle and death.

Most of it fell through Hawke’s mind like a red haze.

She almost fought on automatic nowadays. It was a dangerous place to be. Lulled into a false sense of safety in too many ways.

There were too many things that were waiting to surprise her. Too many things that were about to go wrong, and if she was lucky a thing or two that was about to go right.

The last few years had not been kind to her: Leandra her own mother had died at the hands of a serial killer, her brother died on the way to Kirkwall, and her sister, Bethany, might as well be dead to her, in the Grey Wardens.

She loved her friends, but many were slipping into madness or desperation at least a few were fun and stable like Varric and his never ending prattling, she smiled and the thought, and cheating at Wicked Graced. He’d never call it cheating; of course, he’d call it inspired playing with extra improved bluffing.

Sebastian moped about his castle she supposed practicing putting arrows in melons. He was a bit more twisted than most gave him credit for and was growing more crazed by each passing day.

Anders had always been a hot mess, and that was on a good day and the best/kindest description she could come up with. His rugged good looks were fading into hallowed out eyes that lived in nightmares.

Aveline had married Donnic, which was wonderful for both of them. Normally Hawke would have loved every moment of it for her friend except most recently Isabela howled at the idea of the big girl having sex and liked to speculate on it and what it might be like a bit too much for Hawke’s taste. Hawke found her fascination with it a tad bit strange from time to time. There wasn’t much they had left to the imagination at one time or another when it came to the bedroom and various partners or situations, but even Hawke would draw the line there, though Isabela had never proposed sleeping with any of their companions, she hoped Isabela would never suggest it.

Aveline would be going a bit too far.

Merrill she would consider as long as she wasn’t too fragile and she was still with Maren. Merrill’s curiosity about Isabela and Hawke’s behavior in the bedroom (well fucking anywhere really) bordered on a bit obsessive sometimes. At times Hawke thought it might do them good to spend a weekend together and just get it over with. Hawke swore sometimes she would take down notes after one of Isabela’s many stories to try on Maren no doubt.

She imagined Aveline would turn the color of her hair if Isabela proposed anything, but she’d always felt they (Aveline and Isabela) had a strange attraction to each other, but it was not an attraction Hawke shared, and she didn’t think Donnic was the type to share or she would suggest the two of them go kill something together some weekend. Hawke knew where Isabela’s heart lies even if her back had laid al over Ferleden.

It had been hard at first to think of her more than just a tryst. She had discovered she had feelings for her years before Isabela discovered she also had feelings for Hawke. Isabela once she figured it out was 100 percent willing to make a commitment in her own way.

Hawke had been struggling. It wasn’t intentional. When Isabela had run off…Hawke didn’t know she could hurt so much, not after all she had lost. What was one lover? She could have taken 100 lovers. It’s not that there weren’t others that were interested. Plenty were even proficient in bed…

Hawke had never taken a serious lover before Isabela. Those always bemused amber eyes. She was always up for fun with a side of danger and crazy. Truly there was no one like Isabela. She was one of a kind.

Underneath that slutty rogue beat the heart of a weasel, but a weasel with a heart of gold. No matter how she tried not to, she loved her. She didn’t ever want to be hurt again, but she knew what love felt like. She didn’t know if she could ever trust her, but she was going to have to trust her…

She had to find a way to trust her, or she was going to have to walk away…

There could be no 50/50 anymore.

Fenris cleaved the nearest attacker to Hawke in half, which was fortunate, because her own blade was still stuck the corpse’s ribcage in front of her. It was annoyingly attached. Zevron gave a quick blade to an assassin fighting at close quarters near Merrill.

“The Crow’s have grown fat and slow.” Zevron teased and laughed.

How did Isabela know this guy? Hawke stopped at the thought. How did her pirate queen know any guy? Hawke sighed kicked the corpse and freeing her blade.

Hawke’s blade found a new home and pushed through the back of a man with her blade bring him up short of slicing Isabella’s throat from behind. Isabela had already begun to dance away from harmlessly from his eager blade and used her counter blade to slit his throat, but she always loved it when Hawke managed to find a reason to sidle a way up next to her during battle. Whether Hawke or Isabela killed the man first was hard to tell, but Isabela loved it when Hawke was a tad over protective of her favorite rogue.

The gesture was unnecessary, but it was the thought that counted and Isabela always loved the extra attention. Besides watching Hawke’s muscles work tirelessly on the battlefield up close and personal always managed to make it to flashes of moments in the bedroom. She loved to watch those muscles working for her. Whether beheading an ogre or gently stroking a clit she loved to watch them work.

They’d been together for years, and Hawke was no less sexy now than she had been years ago. She had a flawless since of grace as she across the battlefield tirelessly moving in and out of slavers and assassins slaying them as efficiently and painlessly as possible.

She was working with a shield today. Perhaps she was bored or hiding an injury. It was unusual. Hawke usually worked exclusively with two-handed weapons in the time Isabela had known her. The shield blocked some of her view. There was nothing wrong with shield fighting, it was an art form of it’s own, she had just rarely seem Hawke take up the board and sword usually leaving that to Aveline. Perhaps, it was because of the mixed group with them today.

Soon only Hawke and her friends were left standing. Slightly winded. Nothing more. A high ranking member of the Crows tried to approach Hawke about turning over Zevron, she let him get about half way through his introduction before sidling up to Isabela under a romantic overtone of a quick kiss, before borrowing her blade and tossing the hilt in her hand feeling it’s balance. She then threw it a good distance across the field into the man’s talking skull.

“…If you would be willing to give up Zevron we of the Crow’s would be quite pleased. You would like to bask in our appreciation.” Thwack.

The knife hit the man in the face. His assistant started to run. Stopped. Hawke had picked up a second blade and tossed the hilt in her hand feeling it’s weigh and balance. Then he picked up the paper his boss had been reading from.

He cleared his throat, “We will show our appreciation by paying a sun of 100 sovereigns and also…”

“You notice how reading that note got the last guy killed?” Hawke started.

“Yes, well, I…”

“So why was that that the smartest thing you could think of to do? There is precisely one of you. We killed the rest. If you have 100 gold, we’ll just take it of your corpse. If you wanted to negotiate you should have done that 20 men ago. Reading off that piece of paper, is just going to piss me off, just that special extra little bit.” Hawke said showing her fingers about an inch apart.

“You shouldn’t throw those you could bend the blade.” Isabela sighed at her.

“He was being really annoying.” Hawke pulled Isabela toward her. Hawke was feeling amorous, “Besides, I sleep with the owner. She let’s me get away with murder. Literally. All the time.”

“Is that so?” Isabela asked. “Don’t break my new blades as throwing knives on some thugs skull.” Beating on Hawke’s bare upper arm that wasn’t covered by her new armor. Hawke lifted her easily off the ground laughing.

“So if I stop reading this will you not kill me?” The crow asked.

“No.” Fenris started. “She will not kill you.” He swung his blade hard cleaving him completely in half. “She won’t have time to--because I will.”

“Very nice.” Zevron said applauding.

“If you say so.” Fenris said. “He annoyed me. Slightly more than you do.”

“Is he always this broody? It is quite sexy, yes?” Zevron looked around.

Merrill said, “He’s always like that. No, sometimes when he gets really mad he pulls your heart out of your chest.”

“Really?” Zevron asked.

“The only one left to demonstrate it on would be you.” Fenris said.

“Perhaps another time…Isabela,” Zevron belly laughed in a mirthful way. Truly no more diametrically opposed elves existed than Zevron, Fenris and Merrill.

“Well since there will be no handing me over to the Crows is there anything I can do for you before I depart?” Zevron asked with a bow.

“How do you know this man?” Hawke asked not sure if she really wanted to know the answer.

“He was the assassin sent to kill my husband.” I believe I remember I told you thanked him profusely. Though he needs ne more thanks he is quite proficient, for a man. He has great stamina. He’s just your taste if you’re in the mood.”

“Why, thank you.” Zevron said bowing.

“Really, Isabela?” Hawke sighed.

“What? It’s Zevron. He’s always in the mood, and quite good, at just about everything on the menu.”

“Thank you. And she is quite right, about the mood. I remember having quite a good time myself though it’s been years. I’m sure experience has given way from youthful exuberance, both have their place; however, I would be pleased to serve you both in any capacity together or separately…I don’t like to impose in anyway.” Zevron bowed at the waist and waited as he paused after a flourish with his hands.

Hawke was annoyed at the timing. She really didn’t care about the public display of their sex lives. Isabela made sure that was on display for anyone to see when ever anyone was curious. Hawke was shocked Isabela hadn’t commissioned a book on the topic with explicit pictures, mostly because she had never thought of it, and Hawke wasn’t going to give her any ideas. Plus, Merrill was enamored enough.

Honestly, it was about the spider guts.

“We’re covered in gore, not just from people but from all those damned Sundermount spiders.” Hawke began to grumble.

Isabela had forgotten about the spiders and knew Zevron was unlikely to wait even for amazing sex. She sighed. What a waste. It would have been a great anniversary present. “I expect make up sex.” She pouted.

“Have you ever gone without?” Hawke asked.

“Well no. But I was in the mood for something special. Something fun in particular.”

“Aren’t you always?” Hawke again, there was no disparaging sound, just an honest question.

“Ah well ladies, then I must bid you, adieu. Another time then.” Zevron bounded off.

“After a good scrubbing, I promise you all the attention and imagination you can handle.” Hawke sheathed her weapon and set slightly faster pace than normal for home. Isabela smiled.

***

Isabela had just thought of the toy she had been saving. Normally, Hawke wasn’t into toys as much as she was into people, situations or positions, but this toy had been made special from a seer from Rivani. Normally, she wouldn’t buy into such tripe, but she tasted its pleasures.

When Isabela had tried it on Hawke it had been fairly mind blowing, but she managed to keep to it to herself. The sex was pretty fantastic that night anyway.

It was rare when Hawke was interested in using a toy though she never denied Isabela anything. The toy had quite a bit of build up by the sales person, but it lived up to its sales pitch.

Isabela had been shocked, and only used it once. She decided she wanted to save it for a special occasion. It was their anniversary of sorts. If they had an agreed upon date it would be today.

It was never discussed, but Hawke went out of her way every year to have some sort of thoughtful gift followed by mind-blowing sex. Isabela was practically craving her abs, but Hawke didn’t know about the play toy Isabela had procured, nor what it did.

What it did--was pretty amazing.

Sure any dildo could be fun from time to time, but this one was probably a Tevinter special or something. Hawke exclusively slept with women. There might be a man or two brought along here or there at Isabela’s behest, but they were for her enjoyment.

As far as Isabela knew, Hawke had never been with a man, at least she had never been with one when Isabela had been around nor had she ever mentioned one.

In bed Hawke was easily the wettest woman Isabela had ever been with and the tightest. Given their experimentation and proclivities Hawke, if she had a hymen, had given it up to Isabela long ago. This was a point that was not lost on Isabela in her many games. Still any toys she used were relatively small.

She had gotten this very small strap-on from this seer very into love and passion. Ironically it was the same woman who had sold Hawke the Rivani fertility necklace she had given to Isabela the year before.

It seemed small and standard, but the woman insisted that it was meant for “true love” and it would act on it if the “love were true”. She couldn’t explain it, but for 10 sovereign two women in the throw of passion could experience a different kind of physical pleasure. If it were “true love”, the Maker we give them the greatest gift of all.

Isabela didn’t see how you could get a ship out of a dildo, but it was really well constructed, and it seemed as though it could almost vibrate against where your clit would ago in while she held it in her hand. It felt, like an extension instead of just like a lifeless toy.

When she had pulled it out at Hawke’s estate about a month ago during a third or fourth round of lovemaking Hawke seemed to like the idea and helped Isabela put it on.

Since Isabela had come back to Kirkwall she had really let herself get thrown into sex with abandon. When she and Hawke had been with Hawke before she had left Kirkwall it had just been great sex. Hawke had always been a bit amorous toward her, and even though it was only vaguest form of clingy, Isabela hadn’t liked it, but she had always loved the sex.

Hawke was a wiz in the sack. Tireless and imaginative, she was certainly never a bore or a drag. She was rarely jealous, oh Isabela had tried over the years, but the fact that Isabela stayed seemed enough for the Champion, and the Champion’s never-ending affections and attentions seemed enough for Isabela. Until Isabela left Kirkwall she honestly felt Hawke was great but completely replaceable.

Isabela had been terribly wrong.

Isabela had paid a very high price.

So had the Champion.

Since they had returned to their strange enough normal all had been fine, or seemingly enough.

Something deeper was going on and Isabela knew it. She could feel it. It bothered her, but she couldn’t help herself.

She knew she had fallen for Hawke, but couldn’t bring herself to say it. She hoped she didn’t have to say it, though she knew she would have to put her pride aside and tell her at one point.

It would have to be an all or nothing moment. She had considered talking to her about it on their anniversary. The toy might heighten everything, if she played her cards right.

The seer had tried to explain, but you couldn’t really explain it.

She and Hawke and been rutting for years. She and Hawke had both come several times, but it was one of those nights you just couldn’t seem to get enough of one another.

Isabela felt her body quiver as Hawke ran her hands over Isabela’s body that was slick with a nights worth of hard won sweat. The air was cool and she sat up pulling her own body against Isabela’s to warm hers. The toy was only 6 inches long and only two fingers thick, but more than enough to get the job done if used correctly.

When Hawke went to touch the tip of the toy, Isabela felt like she was touching her. She gasped, it felt incredible. The head of the toy was moist like a drop of dew and Hawke had no way of knowing, but when she brushed her thumb across it, it was like was touching Isabela’s slick hooded clit. Isabela cried out in shock and pleasure.

Hawke positioned herself over her sexy pirate ladies cock that seemed slightly slick on the head, when Hawke pushed herself down on Isabela she could feel how tight, hot and wet Hawke was. Isabela dug into the back of Hawke’s arms crying out shaking begging her to be still for a moment.

Hawke was accustomed to Isabela’s need to role-play. Still Isabela held her close against her body.

“Wait. Please.” She begged in a throaty voice. She was gasping trying not to come. Nothing had prepared her to feel that. Her clit basically got to feel like what she imagined a cock would feel like.

She certainly didn’t want to instantly come if this was her one magic induced chance to be inside her lover. Isabela was usually anything but gentle, but that night she was. She could feel everything. As she pulled out and slowly pushed back in she felt Hawke lips quiver and moan as she pushed her backwards kissing her and felt her pussy tighten around her clit or cock or whatever it was. She felt herself growing harder inside Hawke. The last thing she wanted to do was come, and it was everything she wanted to do.

Isabela set a very slow pace and Hawke clung to her every movement. She felt what it was like to be inside her. Isabela could fill her up. It was beyond words.

“It’s like I can feel you.”

“What?” Hawke whispered.

“This, it’s supposed to be magic. It is like magic.” Isabela started then stopped. “ I just want to be with you, as if ever bit of this was real. Please.”

Isabela set a slow pace pushing inside her and pulling out gently guiding her overly excited cock with her hand.

Having never experienced anything like it before it was a little overwhelming, but Hawke seemed to be enjoying it and milking her with each beck and call. Isabel hung on as best she could.

Hawke could swear she heard Isabela mutter something dangerously close to something about love as she thrust into her one last time before losing control and taking Hawke with her with her words and the vague idea of admitting love. The darkness swirled with passion the sweat. Muscles she wasn’t quite sure she had clenched and released.

Oddly the toy seemed less firm but Isabela left it inside of her and for once she didn’t mind she just held her close in a swirl of darkness and color and lost a sense of time. It might have been the only time Hawke could every remember Isabela falling asleep in her arms and Hawke being the first to wake near dawn.

The two women were mostly naked. There always seemed something that got left on in their hastiness that never got quite taken off; no matter how many rounds they went. It had just become endearing. Isabela was still asleep. Hawke enjoyed looking at her lover and tracing the edge of her body with a light thumb and finger.

The toy was still on and Hawke went about starting to unfasten it’s many buckles, she Isabela moaned she swore she thought it rose in reaction a bit.

Isabela woke up to Hawke gently unstrapping her and she’d be damned if the thing wasn’t still reactive. She’d be ready to go in about two seconds. She unbuckled the main buckled that was hidden from view before it was a dead give away, and got rock hard.

This was a piece of magic, that should definitely serve man…well woman…well she and Hawke…when the time arose.

Damn was it dawn? Isabela saw the blush of the sky turning pink. Hawke was clearly interested in another round, and apparently so was she, though she’d never stayed an entire night at the estate.

Before she could ponder it too much her half awareness gave way to Hawke’s tongue kissing down her body distracting her from leaving. She was just thing about leaving when Hawke’s tongue flicked across her clit. She caught Hawke’s short dark mussed hair between her fingers and let out a surprised scream or pleasure.

She had been distracted, but Hawke’s tongue lapping on her clit was always a good time. How fast or slow she came. How slow or hard. It really didn’t matter; it was a done deal that it was going to be great run.

She had plans for the toy to surprise Hawke, but for now all she could think about was the woman lapping up the slickness in-between her legs. She moaned and looked down as she grabbed Hawke more tightly by the hair.

Hawke smiled at what she was doing. It was rare to catch Isabela by surprise so easily. Isabela was in every moment with Hawke. She was with her with every stroke of her tongue. She thought about nothing in the future, nothing in the past. Her whole world was Hawke and her tongue. Hawke considered adding fingers, changing positions, she considered many things, but sometimes simplicity was the best.

Isabela grasped harder. Hawke kept her tongue rounded. “I love the way you feel in my mouth.” Hawke whispered into Isabela’s dripping wetness. There was a mention of love, but again not the direct kind, but it had an instant reaction.

Isabela instantly caught her breath and time stopped. All she felt was pleasure rush to her. Hawke was still there lapping at her, normally she would be sensitive, but she rode through the orgasm into the next, and into the next. Each one intensifying and causing a slight cramp of pain with an explosion of pleasure.

Isabela didn’t stop Hawke, Hawke stopped herself when she felt Isabela had, had enough, after the fifth orgasm and Isabela began to whimper she knew the cramps would eventually outweigh the orgasms effects.

Hawke cupped her hand to cover Isabela’s now too sensitive soaked pussy and Isabela responded by roughly forcing her hand on top of Hawke’s and riding out the last waves of the orgasm.

As her breathing returned to normal, she search Hawke’s face gently smiling at her for something to say, “You make me feel incredible.”

“Good. You are.” Hawke laughed simply.

“Now why are you laughing like that?” Isabela asked. “What’s the big joke?”

“You’re always afraid you’re missing something. You’re not. Sometimes it’s that simple.” Hawke said stretching. Isabela liked the way Hawke’s muscles rippled underneath that simple stretch. She was so yummy. She was either unaware, or she simply didn’t care. She never showed it off. She wished she’d do it more often. She ran her hand down Hawke’s abs. They felt like steel underneath, but soft and warm to the touch. Isabela let her hand wash over them dreamily soaking them in. She was distracted.

“There is no big cosmic joke, Isabela.” Hawke said. “You make me laugh, because I feel good. Is there anything wrong with that?”

“I suppose not. I just don’t understand why you’re laughing.” Isabela started to pout.

“It’s nothing bad. I laugh because I feel so good. I feel so good because I’m with you. I enjoy it. We never talk about it, because you don’t like to…but do I really have to apologize for feeling good after great sex?” Hawke asked raising an eyebrow. “Or did you not notice we had great sex? Only I thought it was great sex, because I’m just like a man, and only I’m satisfied.”

Isabela thought back to the clit/cock toy and the release she got when she got to fill up Hawke.

“There’s no point in being a goose. That was a pretty good go. You were feeling inspired?” Isabela asked running her hands over Hawkes breasts and small athletic frame. She hadn’t felt this good in a while. What had that toy done to her? It had felt amazing to feel like she was part of Hawke.

Isabela wondered what Hawke would think when felt it?

She’d been trying to tell her, her feelings.

Their anniversary was coming up.

What if she could time it during sex?

Would that be awful or would that is perfect?

***

Isabela tripped over nothing on the way back to Kirkwall from Sundermount. The small group had fallen into silence. It was feast or famine when it came to banter across the Free Marches.

Hawke tuned in time for Isabela to trip into her waiting arms. Isabela couldn’t have planned it better if she had tried.

Isabela paused a few seconds and the others moved along ahead. Hawke and Isabela were at the back anyway.

Isabela wasn’t one to break the rules on Hawkes “No spiders gore” rule, but wanted to give her lover a quick moment to think about the evening to coming.

Isabela could always find a way to kiss Hawke that would instantly pull at her very core and she would throb with excitement. Hawke would swear she was a mage, instead of just an incredible lover.

The deep pull at her core left her feeling as though someone had just stroked her clit. She had been watching Isabela’s bizarre behavior talking to herself in the tavern in the last week, and when Isabela spoke, she realized what it was she had been doing. She’d been planning a speech.

“Hawke. Hawke. I think…I think, I’m falling for you.” Isabela stammered.

Isabela had bought herself time with the kiss. She knew she could leave Hawke off pace with simple desire alone. Though the desire was never simple.

“I thought you said, love wasn’t for you.” Hawke quipped back.

“I know what I said; I know why I said it. Just let me know. Let me know if I have a chance with you, Hawke.”

“Promise you won’t go off breaking me heart.”

“I won’t if you don’t give me cause to.” Isabela turned away across from her feeling very vulnerable the others were our of sight and earshot. Hawke pulled Isabela back to her and sealed the agreement with a kiss.

Could it be that easy? Was Hawke serious? Isabela had to know?

She had plans for that toy tonight.

What Isabela didn’t know is what the Rivani Seer had tried to tell her. It was more than a sex toy. If it was used under passion and true love it bestowed could bestow one of the Makers gifts on the women.

It was made with magic and amplified by love. If Isabela got what she wanted, she might get more than what she bargained for.

She never took precautions with a female lover against pregnancy, why would she? It wouldn’t make sense. The fertility Talisman she wore only amplified the affect. She would never think of it, because in a normal world two women could never get pregnant together, but in a world of magic, talismans, and warnings she hadn’t heeded she wasn’t about to get more than just incredible sex on her anniversary.

***Preview:

Right before Hawke came Isabela stopped her midstroke. It was damned near impossible, but Hawke managed not to come. She held back though every nerve and fiber in her being begged for release.

“Please Hawke, I have to know something.”

It’s obvious that mostly all Hawke can concentrate in that moment is not blowing her load. The experience has been amazing. Being able for once what it was like to be inside Isabela, to feel how tight she is, how wet she is, how she pulls invitingly at her. It’s intoxicating. How her body ached for Hawke responding to her. Wanting her.

Hawke did stop and she is trying to process and listen. She is also trying desperately not to come. Isabela has planned this as some sort of test of mettle of love, no doubt.

“Do you truly love me Hawke?”

Isabela could feel Hawke’s response before she said it. Isabela felt Hawke get harder inside her Isabela wouldn’t have believed that was even possible, and her fake clit/cock pushed up harder into Isabela’s g-spot.

“Yes.” Hawke manages with a raspy breath. “I love you. I’m not going anywhere.”

Isabela grasped Hawke’s hand and took her hands in hers reaching up and allowing Hawke to finish thrusting one last time.

Hawke made a strangled sound as she came and she released every tension everything she had into Isabela. Isabela’s body responded by trying to suck everything Hawke had.

The egg that was naturally traveling it’s way down carrying it’s copy of Hawke’s DNA to be wasted another month is transformed into a hundred thousand messengers that pour out of the end of the toy as Hawke chokes coming on her own orgasm. Isabela’s satisfaction at hearing and feeling love begins lapping at her own orgasm.

Magic induced. The toy has a short life span for that couple, for most couples it lasts a lifetime and it’s magic is never used. This one is shriveled and disintegrates. The orgasm was something that was something that was never really something to be felt. It was a bit of what both people feel when they connect as one physically and psychologically. There is sweat. Cries of pleasure, dopamine, release, love, chemicals and two bodies looking for a way to procreate through love.

Hawke Pulled Isabela to her completely and utterly spent. She felt boneless and amazing. Finely after an unknown amount of time Isabela pushed Hawke to the side so she could snuggle into her shoulder. Hawke didn’t move.

Isabela looked down and saw the toy had shrunk down to small size.

“Guess it’s just good for a one-time use.” Hawke laughed when she saw it had shriveled to a nominal size. “We should check out that seer. That was more fun you paid for it.”

Isabela laughed. “I did get to use it once too.”

“You, what?”

“Yeah, I stumbled on it by accident. Pretty amazing stuff. I thought we should save it for something special.”

“Yeah.” Hawke started. “I think I might do another deep road expedition to support my habit.”

Both women laugh having no idea that the magic started anything more than a great orgasm.

****Some notes****

Seems to not work anymore go back to the seer she bought it from find out the truth behind it.

Seer never mentioned it, because true love thing didn’t seem like Isabela’s thing.

They fulfilled the ritual without meaning 2. Turns out Isabela is pregnant.

Complications. Does Hawke believe it’s hers?

Chapter Text

Chapter 8

Isabela seemed to be a different woman of late, zipping around, laughing Hawke could swear she was practically twinkling. She wasn't even interesting in drinking as far as Hawke could tell.

She was plenty interested in Hawke, but they'd saved serious coin not going to the brothel or the tavern. Isabela seemed happy, insatiable, and to Hawke a bit more than worried with her bizarre behavior, well bizarre for Isabela. The lack of drinking, trash-talking, and friendly three-ways of whatever Isabela felt like bringing home (though she always shopped to Hawke's taste to be fair) was strange enough, but she genuinely seemed happy. She usually put herself down, but even that had stopped.

Every morning Isabela spent puking her guts up, afternoons too, truth be known. Hawke would have assumed the obvious, but they hadn't been with any men and Isabela likely to brag about anyone and everything she did.

She didn't want to go to healer, which was odd because she spent her life going to them. Her insatiable voracious need for sex ended her up seeing Anders on a regular basis. It's not like she was shy about it.

It wasn't a written rule per se. Even before Isabela left Kirkwall she rarely sought the attention of others unless Hawke was around, and then it was just the brothel, but it was always mentioned.

But this time Hawke had actually asked. Isabela had thought for a moment. Though originally she had been bitter about not having a bit of fun with Zevron, she hadn't included a man…well since they'd been back together in Kirkwall. It had sort of shocked her.

She had only been with Hawke; they hadn't even added another woman in the mix. Isabela smiled about having to fix that too.

"I guess you might be enough for me after all. Who knew that could even be possible?" Isabela laughed.

"Really Isabela?" Hawke let it roll off her tongue equally playful.

"I don't know. Is this what love is supposed to be?" Isabela asked and actually pondered the though. Isabela never pondered anything.

That also worried Hawke.

Isabela wasn't the type to think; she was more the type to react.

Isabela thinking could lead to anything, and not always good things.

Hawke decided to tackled her right there. She was too close to the bed not to take advantage of that opportunity. "I don't know. Love isn't for you, remember." Hawke said swiftly pinning her to the bed. Isabela allowed her get away with it for the moment.

True Hawke was raw muscle and power, but Isabela was much more lithe. Hawke reached down and bit her lover's neck gently. Nuzzling it until she got the surprised harden nipples, goose bumps, quickened breath, and slightly damp pussy that would have followed. Isabela let out a loud moan. Isabela never cared who heard her outside the Hawke estate. More than one passer by had slowed their pace outside the Champion of Kirkwall's estate to listen to the performance over the years. Varric often joked he could sell ring side tickets to just have people listen in the lobby and have an orgy ensue. Hawke had never had much of a sense of humor about that sort of thing, but Isabela took it as a compliment. She loved being Hawke's lover. She took the fact that Hawke never strayed as a complement to her prowess in bed. Holding her complete attention of the years.

Hawke certainly never argued the point.

It was one of the reasons Isabela always felt they had worked over the years. She never held Hawke's leash, unless Hawke was feeling in the mood for that sort of thing. Hawke could go and do as she pleased, so she never strayed far. Oddly, she supposed the same had become true of her.

Hawke had pinned her many times over the years, she seemed to forget outside of this bed Isabela was an equally worthy combantant.

It didn't take much to turn the tables on Hawke, though she rarely did. She spun and pinned Hawke so fast Hawke was shocked, impressed, and instantly wet at the prospect. Isabela relied more on speed and less on strength, and it's how she worked her blades to her advantage. In this case how she worked her lover to her advantage. Hawke was always quick to snatch off her underwear with her teeth, it was one of her signature moves, one Isabela enjoyed very much, but she wondered how Hawke would feel having her world turned on her so quickly.

Hawke had only been in her robe and a favored translucent pair of small clothes Isabela carefully ripped away with her teeth. Hawke warm skin was exposed instantly to the cool air but instantly covered by a hot darting tongue. Isabela wasn't one to usually forgo foreplay, but apparently she didn't need foreplay as Hawke nearly came the instantly Isabela took her clit in her mouth.

Isabela hadn't planned on instant sex, but certainly had no hard fast rules against it. Isabela reached up and brushed over Hawkes hard nipple with her palm barely touching it. Hawke gasped her body on fire. Hawke more on instinct moaned and reached for the back of Isabela's hair grasping its soft layers as if checking to see that the moment was real.

Her soft wet licking sounds consumed her every thought, and she shamelessly spread herself open thrusting her hips forward begging Isabela for more. Hawke reached down to touch Isabela; however, Isabela was keeping herself out of Hawke's reach. This was meant for her to lay back and enjoy. It was overwhelming for Hawke not to have a distraction and Isabela was enjoying every moment of it.

Normally, Hawke was truly the giver in bed. She always made sure Isabela's needs were taken care of. It was rare that Isabela had Hawke's attention at her every stroke and lick. Hawke wasn't accustomed to being on only receiving end of attention. She didn't quite know what to do with herself. Isabela, definitely had to do this more often, she told herself.

Hawke all out screamed her pleasure.

Hawke was no where near orgasm, she just hadn't been spoiled the way Isabela had.

Hawke pulled at Isabela's hair with both hands watching her. The Rivani had incredible talents with her tongue, but Hawke was usually distracted by something else.

"Oh Maker" Hawke started. "Let me touch you."

"No." Isabela smiled. "I finally have your full attention. Do you think I'm going to let that go?"

"Bela. I can't hold on like this." She spoke thorough gritted teeth.

"I know. That's why I'm doing it. I don't think you can last very long at all. I didn't realize how selfish I've been all these years." Hawke's Pirate queen slipped her tongue across the warrior's wet clit sucking it in her mouth for a second taking in a fresh taste of her of flavor. Hawke's body shook as she moaned and braced herself trying not to come. "You've always distracted yourself with me to keep yourself from coming too soon. Really, I've just been cheating you out of being multiorgasmic."

"I don't think I can. I know you can." Hawke was having a difficult time thinking and forming words

"Yes, well, why don't we spend a little time finding out."

"I don't know."

"I know I'm a shit, but after this many years, you think you can trust me in this one thing?" Before Hawke could answer Isabela slid her tongue across Hawke's clit as she gently pushed a single finger inside her. Hawke screamed loudly from the clitoral orgasm she was trying to control, and it had gotten away from her. Her tender bud was pulsating and she though she was spent normally she would have stopped, but Isabela had been pushing though her wetness inside her gently massaging her.

It was the way she knew Isabela liked to be touched. It felt completely different. The pressure was building more slowly she was starting to cramp from the first orgasm but as Isabela pushed her body on top of her hers and kept pace touching her once overexcited clit with her gspot, massaging her as she slowly lowered her weight on top of her she felt safe for some reason. The build was incredible. She could feel the walls pushing against her simple finger and someone Isabela knew how to milk the feelings out of her. She could taste herself on Isabela and that just spurred her on. Everything felt deeper.

Isabela's movement's felt more controlled, more calculated than usual. Hawke usually didn't like having things inside her; she was trying not to hurt her maybe, or maybe, "Maker, right there." She breathed.

Whatever was coming it wasn't like it was her normal orgasm; she was still touching her clit. That left good, this felt better. She had added a second finger at some point Hawke started to reach up and meet her with every stroke.

"Please." Hawke begged.

She felt Isabela and wanted her to stroke her much faster and harder, but Isabela kept it slower than she wanted to she started to wonder why then …

"Fuck me, Maker" Hawke yelled.

Hawke's world felt like a roller coaster or color feelings, pain, love, pleasure, and she found herself coughing she didn't know why, but everything felt incredible. Her throat felt scratchy. Had she been loud?

Was it minutes?

"Stop."

Isabela pulled out and cupped her hand touching her feeling the after shocks as Hawke's body shook.

It was Isabela for once who took Hawke in her arms. Hawke wasn't quite sure what all she felt, though she felt a tear slip outside her eyes and dampen her short-cropped hair.

"Maker." Hawke choked.

"That's why you should trust your pirate at least twice a day. I'm glad the neighbors got to hear me taking care of you for once." Isabela with that twinkle in her eye she had of late and let her weight fall down on Hawke who tokk her in her arms for a greedy well- earned kiss.

Hawke's body was sore from being clenched that long in, was it just orgasms? Maker. She stretch from underneath Isabela, and Isabela never did tire of Hawke's muscles.

She was amazingly strong, but not bulky, just tensile strength. Still she loved to feel her abs as she gripped them under her hands.

Isabela held her for a long time saying nothing. Hawke wasn't sure what to ask.

"What was that?"

"That is something that supposedly can happen if you love or trust someone enough. It happened with me about six weeks ago, though I'd see if it would work on you. I know the mechanics, but it requires a whole bunch of trust."

Hawke pushed Isabela off with a delighted sigh and a final moan.

"I see." Hawke said. "Normal people have that during sex?"

"Multiple orgasms? Most women don't have them ever, certainly not with someone else in the room. I've never heard of it happening with a man, unless your doing it yourself. All these years, I never once bothered to give you a real…I am a shit." Isabela started. "Then again, I don't know that you would have let me before a few weeks ago. That toy changed you. That orgasm. You mixing love with sex."

Hawke was shocked. Incredulous. "Me mixing love with sex? What about you?"

"What? We all know I never do it. It's not surprise there. Of course, everything has changed for me. I've never mixed love in with another person, much less in the bedroom, but you…you pretend you have…you never have." The pirate leaned against the bed smirking.

"What are you talking about?"

"Oh, you talk a good game Hawke, but you were about emotionally invested in this, whatever this was I was." The Rivani gestured leaving her one armored arm and one red sash to shrug for her to the heavans.

"Relationship is the word escaping you." Hawke said, amused.

"Relationship. Whatever. Bundle it up and call it a bunny. You were just as shocked as I was to bring up love during sex and have your eyes roll in the back of your head." Hawke had started to get off the bed, but Isabela pushed her back down without protest. Straddling her. "You didn't know what love was anymore than I did. You still don't. I still don't. All you know…okay to be fair…all I know…if it feel bloody incredible and I want to see where it goes. I'm willing to risk it. Yes, the sex is great, but it's been great. There just seems to be something more. I want to see what that something more is. I know it's a big risk, but maybe you're worth it. Maybe I'm worth it." Isabela bit at Hawke's bottom lip sucking it in her mouth.

Hawke bit back.

Instead of getting more complex the kiss just got simpler. Hawke held Isabela closer, but ran her hand through her hair.

Isabela Let her hair and and neck fall back and she laughed.

"What's so funny?" Hawke asked. Her hair more fussy than usual after their morning tryst. Isabela liked it and decided to mess with it more.

"I was just thinking about something that Rivani Seer said to me about the talisman and the toy that one would boost the other. If love was involved it could bring the ultimate joy, bestow the ultimate gift that two women could never have. I laughed at the time and told her I didn't see how you could get a ship out of a dildo."

"What did she say? What did you mean? What is this ultimate gift?" Hawke asked suspiciously.

"A way a Rivani seer gets 10 sovereign out of someone for a strap-on". Isabela sighed. "I don't know, it's like the sales pitch crap my mom used to used for anything. She knew I had a lover that was a woman, so she sold it to me using that kind of sales pitch. I was wearing a love talisman so I was seeking love or fertility, that's what these are used for…so that's how she's going to angel the sale. Didn't think the damn dildo would work that well. Hell of a ride. We should go pick up another one. That kind of orgasm might be worth it. I like to watch you have your eyes roll in the back of your head, though this morning was pretty nice too."

"What was the pitch exactly? Do you remember?"

"It's been a while, and I'd been drinking…who pays 10 gold for a magic dildo? I just remember it two women declared their love, and it was deemed to be true, that they would blessed with the ultimate gift two women could in love could never naturally have together or some such rubbish."

"You are kidding?"

"I just got it for a hell of an anniversary present. Glad it worked. Hell of a toy. You're right, we should buy another one." Isabela said remembering the orgasm after that round.

"'Bela. You've been sick every morning for over a couple of months since we used that... toy. I think we need to go see a healer."

"Hawke what are you on about?" Isabela was positively annoyed. "You're as bad as Merrill and Big Girl. I'm glowing. Do I look like I'm glowing to you? Can you see me easier at night?"

"They have a point."

"Did you not just have your first multiple orgasms or did I imagine that? You should be languishing in bed, not thinking at all, or I didn't do a very good job of it."

"Yes, well I…" Hawke stammered. "It was amazing 'Bela. It's not that. It was. I can't explain it, I just don't think you put the last few months together. We should see Anders."

"He's a bore." Isabela started to get dressed.

"I'm not talking about a game of Wicked Grace." Hawke said.

"You know most women go through their lives without having one. You should have seen yourself. Maker you looked amazing. Thinking that I was there when that happened. Before you Hawke I thought a good lover was a good lover, but that was amazing. I thought good sex was enough. Love, though. It's quite delectable." Isabela pushed Hawke back over. "Care to have another go?"

"Delectable? Have you been looking up words, again?" Hawke asked laughing.

"Yes, say what you will, but you always like it." Isabela laughed freely. She loved looking into Hawke's eyes lately, and instead of feeling smothered all she saw was freedom with being with the woman she loved.

How the idea used to bother her. Love. It annoyed her to hear people talk about it. Drone on about it. Mix it up with with sex, but lately she wouldn't have it any other way. Coming back to Kirkwall Hawke had made her practically crawl to make sure she wouldn't take off and hurt her again. She really hadn't understood why. Not really. Not until she dealt with the fact that she had the same feelings Hawke had for her.

It was early in the day, and suddenly she went from quite willing to quite ill. She dashed off Hawke to the privy cursing whatever she ate. It certainly hadn't been whatever she'd been drinking. She didn't know why, she just hadn't been in the mood for drink lately. She'd been staying at Hawke's Estate she'd not been back to the Hanged Man since their anniversary. Hawke had said nothing.

Isabela felt a cool rag and closed her eyes as she felt Hawke next to her waiting for whatever it was to pass as she knelt by the basin. "I don't want to hear it. I'm not going to Anders."

"He's the best healer in Kirkwall." Hawke implored.

"Then will have to go somewhere else." Isabela muttered throwing up again. Hawke caught her and wiped her face off with the cool rag.

"Sundermount then. We could go to Keeper Marethari." Hawke said evenly.

"These are my choices?" Isabela moaned.

"You've been sick for months, every morning. You haven't had your period, or haven't you noticed?" Hawke said evenly.

"I haven't been with anyone but you Hawke." When I'm with men, I take precautions. I've never been pregnant, I see no reason why I would be now.

"Then if you're just ill, why not just get it checked out?" Hawke asked.

"Because it's probably nothing." Isabela wiped her mouth and got up unsteadily to her feet.

"You've never refused a healer. Why now?" Hawke asked.

Isabela stopped. She'd never really considered the question. "Because I'm happy dammit. For the first time in my life I'm happy, and if I'm not okay I don't want to hear about it."

"If you sick, Anders is the best healer there is. If your pregnant…" Hawke started.

"I'm not pregnant" Isabela shut her down as best she could.

"If you are pregnant, I'm not leaving you." Hawke said. She eyed Isabela steadily.

"Hawke, when I said, I've only been with you, I meant it. There hasn't been another man or even another woman. There hasn't been anyone unless you've been there, and it's been over six months. It's just not possible." Isabela had set her jaw and she wasn't listening.

"Did you even consider the seer had to say the talisman boosting the toy? We live in a land of magic." Hawke started cautiously.

"My mother was a seer, or claimed to be one. It's all rubbish." The Rivani started.

"We fight demons that come out of Thedas everyday. They take over the minds of men, and you question this possibility?" Hawke asked.

"I haven't cheated." Isabela stated.

"I haven't accused you of it." Hawke said.

"If I go will you stop this rubbish?" Isabela asked.

Anders clinic was always busy, but it maintained a steady cliental from every socio-economic class. People paid what they could. Hawke would pay for a week's worth of Dark Town's patient's. Anders and Isabela not getting along was an understatement; however, he had grown accustomed to treating her over the years. He never said complained, because he knew keeping whatever Isabela caught away from Hawke, kept Hawke healthy. Besides, Hawke was aware of Isabela's tastes, even if he never understood the couple. Hawke could have had anyone in Kirkwall. Why she stayed with Isabela was beyond him.

Really why she chose Isabela over him was beyond him, truth be told. His eyes flashed Justice for a moment. This was not the time.

It took less than 10 seconds for Anders to confirm the fact that Isabela was pregnant, which really should have come to no surprise to anyone. The thing that left him floored was he usually ran a simple spell to see if the father was near or in the vicinity, he did it automatically without thinking.

Then he did it about 5 more times.

It was Hawke.

This he had no explanation for this, except that it wasn't blood magic, but it was magic.

Normally, when you told the couple the reaction could be any number of things. He really didn't know how this was going to go over.

He didn't even know how he felt about it.

"You're pregnant, Isabela." Anders finally said, simply.

"You're mistaken." She said back.

"I'm not. You know I'm not. Do I question whether or not you know ships? You know I'm right. So I'm guessing congratulations are in order?"

"It's not possible. It's got to be a demon or something. Get rid of it, Anders." Isabela glared at him.

"I see. No, it's not a demon. It's a normal pregnancy. Well, fairly normal. There is an oddity or two I can't explain." Anders said rubbing his forhead as he did when he wished things would just go away.

"It's yours and Hawke's." Anders tried to say neutral. "Though I can tell you there is magic involved, I can tell you it's not blood magic. Fertility magic, perhaps. It's strong, but not malevolent. The child and mother should not suffer. You're both very lucky."

Hawke who had been silent this entire time, shifted her weight from one foot to the other. Hawke had imagined Isabela was pregnant, but though more traditional means. She figured the talisman was more of an elaborate ruse, and Isabela wanting to get rid or the baby was more or less an instant reaction to her having been with another lover.

"It's mine." Hawke stated flatly. She ran her hand through her rumpled short hair.

"I'm guessing this wasn't a planned thing then." Anders said.

"No." Isabela and Hawke said at the same time.

"It is mine." Hawke sat heavily in a chair. Well it was one of the purposes that chair served, though he'd never had a woman slump in it before now.

"Yes." Anders said. "I think you might want to take some time and think about things. You are quite early on in the pregnancy, there is time to abort."

"It's really Hawke's?" Isabela said with a small voice. She sounded very small and tiny. "So I'm really pregnant, and Hawke is the father? Well the…"

"In the case of magical intervention, we'll just call her the other parent." Anders said.

"Would the baby be healthy?" Hawke asked.

Anders considered this for a moment, "If the only magic used was for the child's conception, which seems likely the case from what I can tell, it seems a normal pregnancy, then yes, the baby has the same chances of being healthy as any other child. Avoid alcohol and try not to stress out your body unduly. Let me be the first to offer congratulations."

Chapter Text

Isabela and Hawke walked out of Anders office numbly without even touching one another.

"Hawke?" Isabela began looking up at her with large amber eyes that seemed filled to the brim and threatening to overflow with emotions.

Hawke slipped her hand in the small of Isabela's back as she had done years before. Isabela felt the hot tears sting the cheeks of her lover. She honestly had no idea what to say. Perhaps, just asking was best. "This is not something I ever planned on. I never once considered having children, my own mother was a horrible."

"I know." Hawke said evenly. "Mine wasn't.

Isabela plowed on with words without thinking, "I never met a single bastard I would consider having a child with—for—or-whatever reason-I don't even know if I like them. Smelly, strange, and if it happened to be yours…how can it be yours?"

"Anders seemed pretty certain." Hawke laughed for the first time. "It wouldn't be like him to cut you any slack."

"Isn't that truth?" Isabela laughed. "If it wasn't yours I'd already be picking berries if Anders didn't have any on hand and damning my luck. I know how to get rid of it."

"Is that what you want?" The Champion of Kirkwall moved in on Isabela. She whispered it in her ear. It was a question, not a demand.

"Did you mean what you said back there? About not leaving me? That was before you even knew it was yours? How could you even think it could be yours?" Isabela found Hawke's body intoxicatingly close to hers. She was sure a conversation like this should happen with all the lights on and not when she was getting so turned on.

Hawke was not doing it deliberately, of course. She shoved Isabela up outside the wooden walls farthest from the archways of Anders clinic. It was dark there. Normally most would find it scary if they hadn't killed dozens of would-be criminals there, would-be if they had lived.

As the first moan escaped Isabela's lips Hawke pushed her luck and began nibbling on her neck, it didn't take much to get the desired reaction.

Isabela's head was foggy. She instinctively wrapped her legs around Hawke's slim waist. It's not unlike many a semi-public screwing she had so enjoyed in the years passed after a battle or outside the Hanged Man. The rough wood scratching into her back was nothing compared to Hawke's mouth finding hers. Maker she was wet, but Hawke didn't seem to want to push anything faster than just kissing her.

Hawke pushed a scrap of long hair that had fallen into isabela's face back out of the way and Isabela just allowed herself to just be swept away by messy emotions that all seemed to be conflicting, but all ended in one thing, which was wanting Hawke to continue whatever she was doing.

Isabela felt a dampness on her cheeks. She pulled back and looked at Hawke. She hadn't realized it during whatever time had elapsed, but Hawke must have been crying, at least a little. She guessed, she had been too.

She pulled back from Hawke and rubbed a tear from Hawke's face with her thumb. Isabela just spent a moment looking at her. She wasn't looking at Hawke, the Champion of Kirkwall, or the famous warrior, or any other labels or monikers she's been given over the years. The Rivani woman looked at her lover. The very fallable, easily hurt woman, who just wanted to be safe and keep her family safe…her family safe…Isabela was her family…so was this child if Isabela kept it. Is that what Hawke wanted a family together?

It changed things, but not in an unpleasant way. Isabela just wanted a moment to process and unfolded herself from the wall. She took Hawke's hand and headed for a seated alchove that was well-hidden not far from there.

"Did you know? Before we came?" Isabela asked.

"That you were pregnant? Yes. Probably. Merrill knew, or thought she knew. Something elfy. It's Merrill." Hawke took in a deep breath. "It's Merrill, though, you can't be sure when she starts talking about the wind or something in there."

"No, I meant about you." Isabela was watching her closely.

Hawke had to laugh. "No, that one was a complete surprise. "Merrill said she was surprised about who the father might be, but she said it didn't make sense. I thought maybe it was Fenris or something."

"Oh, now that would have been hard to turn down. That brooding piece of raw lyrium muscle and elf art. I might have to have gone solo on that one and told you about it later." Isabela smiled. "He might have been interested years ago, but not now. He would never do anything to hurt you. He even contains his brooding. I swear it."

"What are you talking about?" Hawke was feeling playful. She was trying not to thing about the obvious, because she really didn't know what to think about it.

"Like you haven't noticed how everyone caters to you. I mean everyone. It's like the cult of Hawke lately." Isabela laughed.

"Stop it." Hawke shoved at her.

"My lips to your ears, but it is true. Even Aveline noticed, so it's not just me." No one wants to do anything to hurt or up set the might Hawke.

"So I guess everyone is a mind reader then, because half the time I don't know what I want. Why would I care if screwed Fenris?" Hawke said half laughing, but knowing she wasn't going to be able to play it off.

" You are kidding me right?" Isabela breathed in her ear. "Oh we might have a right fun time together, but ever since I came back, everyone has made damn good and well sure I knew where to toe the line, and that meant not treading on your precious heart. As if I hadn't known I had fucked things up."

"Isabela." Hawke started.

"No wait." Isabela stopped her. "It's true. Every word of it. From Varric to Merrill. Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if one of them planned this if they knew it was possible or something if they thought you wanted it."

"What? Now you're not making any sense." Hawke said.

"I turn a blind eye, because I benefit from it most of the time, but Kirkwall has been rough on you, yeah, but every since Flemmeth showed back up and talked about fate and all, haven't you noticed how everything seems to be church of Hawke or something?" Isabela was really surprised Hawke had never noticed.

"Please excuse me while I go get my, What the fuck are you talking about slippers, I seem to have left those at the estate." Hawke said.

"It's not just one thing, it's a bunch of tiny things, and it's all the time. Even this. Do you want this?" Isabela asked. "Have you ever told anyone you ever wanted this? Anyone ever?"

"You mean you and me together?" Hawke asked.

Maker, Hawke could be dense sometimes when she really tried. What were they feeding her at the estate. Maybe Sandal was in on it too. Maybe Isabela should spend the night away for a few nights and clear her head. Maybe she was too tied up in everything.

"No. Did you ever say anything to anyone about wanting a child, even in passing. Ever?" Isabela asked.

"That's crazy." Hawke said.

"There's plenty of crazy to go around in Kirkwall. You have to admit that."

"I don't know. What about this? What about us? It's not that I never said, no I'd never have your child, it's just that I'd never thought it would come up, because it shouldn't have." Isabela said.

"I agree. It's beyond strange; however…" Hawke started.

"I love you, Hawke. More than anything or anyone. I hadn't planned on becoming a mother." Isabela took a few steps back. "There are some berries I need to gather on Sundermount. I need time to clear my head. I need time to think. They're safe this early on, before a woman starts to show…"

"I know what you're talking about…" Hawke looked away. "Maybe we could talk about this. "I don't think we'd ever get the chance to have another opportunity to, you know."

"I know." Isabela said as Hawke started to turn her head and pull away. "I said I needed time to think, I didn't necessarily mean I was going to do anything without talking to you and giving it…dammit…we don't have to decide now. We've got at least a couple of weeks."

Isabela grabbed her hand and kissed the inside of her wrist. If was one of her most intimate gestures, and she only shared it with Hawke. "Listen to me. If it was anyone else…there wouldn't be a conversation. It's only because it's yours and mine. That's the only reason. I would never want to be a mother what do I have to teach a child? What do we have to offer it?"

Hawke cocked her head for a moment as if thinking.

"What if it was a boy?"Isabela asked.

"We could teach him to kill things." Hawke said simply.

Isabela cocked her head.

"What if it was a girl?" Isabela asked, again.

"We could teach her to kill things. Bad people, demons, and such." Hawke said simply, laughing this time.

"Let's hope it's a boy I'd be a lousy mother. What, I could teach her how to be a good lay, or how to hold her liquor?" Isabela scoffed.

"I think her Aunt Bethany must have a use."

"Right she never has…what does she do with her free time. She really never has had sex?" Isabela asked incredulous.

"I know. I can hardly believe we're related. She could teach her to be a prude who kills things. She did well that year we were in the Red Iron paying off our debt for coming to Kirkwall, or whatever else Gamlin had accumulated into that."

"Look, Ill be back tomorrow." Isabela said. "I just need sometime." Isabela turned to go. But remembered her revelation earlier. "Hawke?"

"Yes, 'Bela." Hawke was waiting for whatever her pirate queen was going to hit her with.

"A family. Is that what you want?" Isabela asked watching her carefully.

"I don't understand." Hawke said, not daring to move. She hoped Isabela got to the point quickly, because she was pretty sure she was holding her breath and she would pass out pretty quickly.

"With me? Do you want a family with me?" Isabela asked.

Hawke didn't actually mean to answer the question. She heard herself say, "Yes." And heard the word form. She didn't want Isabela to run. It was more than she thought Isabela could take in one conversation. She hadn't expected her to ask or ever have the question put to her, she more or less assumed that it would happen if they took it day by day and never planned it. One day Isabela would look up and it would be 40 years later, if they were both quick enough with a blade and lucky enough to live to long. She never thought she would have to answer the question, plus she thought she would always sidestep it.

She did want it.

She heard a metal hinge swing in the background. Suddenly Hawke's hands were very cold and she was more scared than she ever was when she faced down things in battle.

Isabela gave away no trace of emotion one way or another.

"I'll come with you." Hawke started to stammer. "We could use a night out of the city under the stars." Hawke offered.

"We could, but I need to do this alone." Hawke was a fizzled mess of emotions she never dealt with and always pushed down. She really wasn't equipped to deal with any of this. There was probably never a time she was more vulnerable. Isabela wasn't the only one watching.

Isabela tried to console Hawke and pull her toward her. Hawke pushed her away. "I'll be fine. I don't need to be babied. Take the time you need."

"I'm not going to do anything foolish. I promise to come back in the same condition I leave in. I just need a little time Hawke." Hawke looked up at her, her emotions were raw. Isabela could see she was hurt, but Isabela needed a day or two to take care of herself and think things out for herself first. She wouldn't make any decisions independent of Hawke, even if Hawke didn't understand that now, or wasn't capable of understanding that now, how much harm could Hawke do to herself in a day or two?

"Leaving from Dark Town is better this way." Isabela said.

"You're right." Hawke said quietly.

"Well that's a first." Isabela said sitting next to her. "Right about what."

"I had one of those odd conversations you have with people sometimes. It was a what-if conversation with Merrill. I wondered what it would be like if I could have a baby, but not just to have a child, but to have a child in general, but with a woman. Perhaps with the woman I loved."

Hawke sat down heavily on a stump of a root.

"In other words, have a child with you. It was like you said. It was a weird "what if" conversation with Merrill" Six months later, here we are. It does seem a bit too convenient. I just remembered." Hawke said.

"Dammit." Hawke said. "You're right. Something has been off with Merrill for a while now, and Maren has never seemed right. When I'm around her, all of us, we get weird. I can't explain it." Hawke shook her head. "We can talk about it when you get back.

Isabela sighed. "Merrill has been messing around with stuff for a long time. Stuff she shouldn't have been. You ask for things, sometimes strange things, and later they appear, it's not just you, sometimes it's Varric, sometimes it's Aveline, or even me."

"You?" Hawke asked.

"Last year, I thought all the boys who had forced relations with the women at the Hanged Man should be marked by skid marks outside their skivvies."

"I remember that." Hawke howled at the memory.

"Yeah, was a bit of fun. Only I didn't do it." Isabela said.

"Oh." Hawke said.

"Yeah. You slept with her while I was away, Merrill that is." Hawke nodded. "She wanted more. I didn't have more to give. She left right after. I was happy when she got together with Maren. I thought having a lover might help."

"I need a day or two, then I'll be back straight away." Isabela said.

"Yes." Hawke snapped. "I get it. You might not want to keep it."

"Wait are you thinking that's the only reason to go to Sundermount?" Isabela stopped Hawke with her body. "Hawke, no. It's not just that. Those things exist there, yes, but…"

"What?" Hawke was much shorter than she meant to be.

"There are other berries to help with the morning sickness, roots to help the baby be stronger, my mother may not have been a very good seer but she knew her plants and roots. I know what to gather. There are things that I would need if we decided, if we decided to go a different route.

I don't know what we would do with a child, but I could at least bring it into this world healthy."

Isabela took Hawke by her soft angular jaw and pressed her lips against the warriors. Hawke had never considered Isabela might go to Sundermount for more than one reason.

"I need a few days to wrap my head around things. You do too. Take some time off." Isabela said. Hawke pulled Isabela to her and the pirate pulled away from the quick goodbye kiss. Hawke needed something more meaningful, something to remember her by should her memory suddenly shorten and Isabela feel the need to run off to Tevinter.

Hawke did have kissing Isabela down to a science. The slightly damp small clothes would be enough to remember Hawke by for the first night. Isabela smiled when she pulled away.

"I know I don't exactly inspire confidence, but I will be back at your side a few days hence. Trust me in this Hawke. Trust me to come back to you. Trust me to do the right thing. I'll make it right for you."

"I love you, Bela." Hawke said.

"I'll see you soon." Isabela walked out of Dark Town.

Merrill showed up unannounced and was waiting and Hawke's Estate when Hawke arrived.

Merrill had sent Bodan and Sandel off for the night.

This was not the night Hawke felt like entertaining.

Merrill quirky enough behavior gave way to pure desire soon enough. It was hard to say no.

Something about Merrill seemed off. Very different. Hawke was tired. Bone tired. Asking Merrill to leave wasn't going quite as easily as one might have suspected.

"Merrill, I've had a very full and trying day. I need to take a break."

"Isabela isn't here." Merrill said simply.

"Yes, I know. It's one of the reasons I need a break. Some things came up today."

"I know." I was in Dark Town on my way to see Anders. I know she was going to Sundermount. She didn't want to have your child.

"That's not true Merrill. That is not what was said. If you were there why didn't you say anything? What the hell are you talking about?"

"It's not the words she said with her mouth, but the words she said with her mind." Merrill said. The thin elf moved in closer to Hawke. Merrill had been attracted to Hawke for years, but Hawke had never recropcated except for once and Hawke was pretty sure that had been a mistake.

It was when Isabela had been gone for three years and Merrill and wanted more than Hawke could give her.

Merrill slipped prettied loose fitted rope over the bed post and Hawke's wrist wrenching it tightly as Hawke stood near it.

Hawke rolled her eyes. "You have got to be kidding me. Merrill, this isn't going anywhere."

"Are you certain about that?" There was a confidence underlying Merrill that simply shouldn't have been there. It just wasn't like Merrill. She ran her finger down Hawke's open shirt semi gaping to the waist and Hawke felt her entire body shudder with desire.

Hawke felt an urgency rise up from her core and she wanted to touch Merrill and be touched by her. A thousand fantasies played out in her head. Hawke felt groggy. She liked Merrill as a friend, but had never really felt anything for her as a sexually other than one time.

She really didn't consider herself on the market. Technically, she and Isabela weren't exclusive. It wasn't that she couldn't, technically, it's just that she…What was wrong with her? What was going on?

"Merrill, no. This isn't right."

"Why? Doesn't it feel right?" Merrill reached down and stroked Hawke past her small clothes. The stroke went straight to her core and she let out a moan of pleasure, but it wasn't what she wanted. Where the hell was her other hand. There was a flash of something.

Merrill somewhere, not here. Chained up. A pedestal. Stone.
Her other hand was held up against the wall by a frost spell of some sort. The tingling sensation was amazing, but it wasn't what Merrill had in mind. But she just saw Merrill somewhere else. This wasn't Merrill. Was it?

I brought you your favorite toy, I think you remember how this works don't you?

Hawke's mind might have been screwy, but it wasn't this screwy. Whatever this was, wasn't right. And she wasn't 100 percent sure it was Merrill. Hawke kicked at the basin she kept nearest her side of the bed, and sent it flying across the room having missed Merrill and almost hitting Isabela and Maren?

Okay, this was officially getting weird.

The Merrilish creature had a black glow about her and now had a tail. She also seemed to have had staff glowing and directing a spell at Isabela and Maren.

Aveline appeared crawling through the window. Hawke felt pretty doped up, but did not recall having sent out party invitations. She hated to break her own bed but damn it, her friends would bust up her estate worse.

With one hand free she could wrench the other one off the wall.

Was she sure that was not Merrill? It was coming at her with a 12" erect strap on cock. Definitely not Meriill and rude. She snapped it's head, before her friends could tear up her bedroom anymore. She sat on the ground waiting for her brain fog to clear. Luckily Anders was the next one in. One counter spell and she could clearly see the dead desire demon one the floor.

"Kind of squishy for a Desire Demon." Hawke said.

"I'm not sure it was a true one." Maren said. "It was trying to replace Merrill a bit at a time. Trying to convince her to let it do this or that. It would weigh you down with this incredible fog, but tonight was the first night it tried to replace her. I have no idea where she really is."

Hawke started to get dressed in armor out of habit. Can you tell us where to start looking. Maren looked frightened and upset. "No. The only reason it went after her today, is because it's been impersonating me. It's kept me locked up for the last 6 weeks. When I free it went after Merrill. It's a demon, but not like the ones most mages deal with. They are weaker, but more of them.

They want to get to the Champion, but they want to use Merrill to do it. I don't know how it works. I'm scared."

"What are you doing here?" Hawke asked Isabela.

"Good to see you too." Isabela retorted. "I ran into Maren when I entered the forrest. It's when she told me about Merrill. Aveline and Anders, no idea.

"I was following up a lead." Aveline started.

"I was being nosey." Anders said. "Well, I was. I wanted to know how the hell you got Isabela pregnant."

Aveline stopped. "You got Isabela pregnant?"

"Stop it, Aveline. Whatever you're thinking. Stop it before you say it."

"As if that's possible." Isabela snorted.

"I don't know whether to congradulate you or tell you to run for the hills." Aveline said sheathing her sword.

" Nice. Lovely. Shouldn't we be waiting on our put down Isabela day and trying to find Merrill?" Isabela asked.

Anders sighed. "Not as much fun, but she does have a point."

"Let's go talk to Varric. He'll know whatever there is to know about he real Daisey."

Hawke recanted what she could:

Merrill told Hawke how much she admired her. How much she had always loved her, but Hawke always knew that. They could have a child together they way Hawke and Isabela had. Merrill had tied her to the bedpost. It was seductive…her body dripped with desire and Merrill dripped it from every essence of her body…okay she left that part out.

It was wrong. She didn't want it. She wanted to be with Isabela.

Then the droopy eyes the desperation the need for her touch. It wasn't Merrill it was something else. It a Desire Demon, it had taken her form. That meant it had to have her alive somewhere.

They decided to regroup at the Hanged Man. Hawke said she would follow choosing to dispose of the body of the desire demon before leaving rather than leaving it for Bodan to clean up.

Isabela had stayed behind, but Hawke hadn't noticed during her clean up activities.

Isabela pressed her body up against Hawke's from behind. Hawke smiled at the familiarity.

Hawke reached around behind her and pulled boot in front of her before spinning inside.

"So I guess I didn't get that night away after all."

"I guess not. Sorry about that. After we find Merrill." Hawke said.

"The only light in the bedroom was coming from the fireplace. The time was late and they needed to meet the others to see if there was a lead, or they they were going to start tomorrow with Maretheri.

I don't think I needed the whole night anyway. Isabela reached up and gripped Hawke by her neck. "Tell me what you want."

"I don't want us to change, but I know having a child will mean that us will change, by the same time token…I never would never want to give up the chance to have a child with you. Yours and mine, for better or for worse."

"That sounds dangerously like marriage. My last one ended rather abruptly you'll remember. Doesn't that sound like marriage?"

"Does it?" Hawke asked.

"Yes." Isabela purred. "It does."

"I don't think I could buy you for a few goats and some coins, do you think love will suffice? We could spend coin on the baby. Get it a nanny, so it could grow up, but we don't have to."

"Are you serious, Hawke? Is this your idea of proposing to me?" Isabela clung to her neck but never took her honey brown eyes off Hawke's ice blue ones.

"It's as close to ideal as I think I could ever get."

"I think your right." Isabela closed the gap to kiss Hawke. "I don't know the magic that brought this child to bear, but I'd be willing to try and let it run it's course if it's truly what you want, too."

"A family? I guess if it's just you, me, and Bethany."

"We don't have to give up hot sex and killing things. We wouldn't be us."

"Then we'll try." The clock towers begin to chime. "We should meet the others.

Varric looked pissed. He didn't like the idea that a Desire Demon had been messing with Merrill's mind and he hadn't noticed. Then again, they had all been under its influence at one point or another.

They were trying to hash it out, and trying to figure out where the Demon had taken Merrill.

Fenris showed up not long after Hawke and Isabela, Isabela offered to apprise him, but he waved her off. He seemed in a mood, which was not unusual. Sometimes, he just wanted to be pointed in the general direction and told where to start tearing out hearts.

Merrill was physically the weakest of all of them, and though she dabbled in blood magic, which was taboo to all none would see any of Hawke's party left to the fate of a demon. With the Demon dead, there was telling if she would have ample food and water or for how long.

More than likely the runner Hawke had sent to Fenris' estate had told him the basics.

Hawke had sent word to Bethany to track down Feynreil. He may not have reached Tevinter yet. As a dreamer, he night be able to see where Merrill was. For the moment, the only plan they had was to head to Sunder mount and comb the mountain looking for the creature's lair.

The place Hawke had seen Merril had looked like it had been one of the underground places on Sundermount. If wasn't much to go on, but they had to have somewhere to start. Hawke, Isabela, Anders, and Varric would start with Keeper Marethari in the morning to see if there was some kind of tracking spell that she could o on her former first. Like a phelactory or something. They were fairly desperate. Maren was upset and pretty exhausted. Varric had put her to bed in his suite in the Hanged Man.

Since they were leaving early, it looked like Hawke and Isabela would just leave from the Hanged Man in the morning. Isabela kept a room there she hadn't been using. They would kick out whatever riff-raff was there. More than likely Fenris and Anders would just bunk with Varric. None of them ever seemed to care. Everyone was headed up stairs and Varric was still muttering to himself about how he "couldn't believe how he'd been taken in by a demon he wasn't related to".

Isabela gave out a quick cry as though she'd been kicked and grabbed at her stomach. Hawke grabbed her, but saw her eyes seemed distant and far away. They were focused on something, but something not here.

"There's more than one of them with Merrill. They've been planning this for a while. Something about an Inquisition." Isabela was out as though she had been struck.

Anders said, "Let's get her upstairs."

There was a trail of blood that ran down Isabela's mouth. He used a healing spell and a healing potion. He shook his head as though to clear it.

They are using us to spy on each other.

"What does that mean?" Fenris asked.

"I'm sure it's a whole new unpleasantness we don't want to know." Varric stated.

"It is. From what I can tell, someone is using time magic, distorting time. The rifts are from the future, but certain events that are inevitable have already happened and will happened. Varric and Hawke you are in the future in an organization called the Inquisition. They are trying to stop something big, but it's something that hasn't happened yet. These things that have Merrill are also part of a mage rebellion that is caused by events here in Kirkwall. It's a future that's inevitable. I know about them. I cause them to happen.

I think it's one of the reasons I can see the future. I don't know that all of you could. Merrill is in the middle of this matrix. These different types of demons are coming out of a hole in the fade in the future they are the ones that have Merrill. They are trying to stop Hawke in the past from doing something.

It's not clear. We need to get Merrill out of there, so they will lose contact with the you that is now."

Hawke sighed, "Is this the part where I should be grateful that I have a future?"

"Your child might be mixed up in this too, Hawke. I don't know if it's supposed to exist in the future, there's too many time endrals, but it looks like Isabela is alive in some futures, but without a child. You may have to choose."

"Can't anyone look into the future and see puppies and bunnies or something?" Hawke asked.

"Only if they are covered in lyrium and set on fire." Varric said slapping Bianca on his back.

"Thanks Varric." Hawke said.

"No problem."

Anders had gently put Isabela on the bed. There was no riff-raff. "I've been having them keep the place clean." Varric said.

"Thank you, Varric." Hawke said.

"For now, she is okay, Hawke." Anders said. "I don't know what to tell you.

We're about to walk into a great big mess."

"How is that different than every other Tuesday?" Hawke asked.

"This has years of Tuesday's involved. And there are some really bad Tuesdays in there." Anders said quietly.

"Any good Tuesdays." Hawke asked.

"It didn't show me any."

Hawke sighed, "Why would it?"

***

I love Hawke and Isabela, but you know this isn't going to go well without complications.

I hope love is enough. If you love angst, hurt, eventual comfort, sex, and action adventure...you'll like where this is going.

Chapter Text

Chapter 10

It had been an exceptionally bad week.

Varric and Hawke had been taken for ransome. Hawke's friend's had managed to get them back, but at a high price.

A very high price.

No one was really talking about.

Isabela, least of all. She had gone just this side of insane. She'd been a few weeks away from delivering and probably shouldn't have gone, but no one could talk her out of it. What if Hawke didn't come back?

One of the mages that had arranged the thing ended up using a blood magic ritual with the fetal blood, it terminated the pregnancy and Hawke got the opportunity to fight her own child as a demon.

It had been beyond awful, even by Kirkwall's standards of awful.

Hawke's merry band of misfits had left going separate ways, and left Isabela and Hawke to deal with it on their own as best they could, which wasn't well.

When Hawke walked into the Hanged Man a few weeks later Isabela on the verge of letting herself get passed around by three guys or gang raped depending on your point of view.

It was clear she didn't care. She was drunk, and whether it was her idea or someone else's she was drugged.

Varric and Hawke were supposed to be gone to the Deep Roads, but had to turn back. It wasn't exactly suicide, but Isabela had decided to let the world have its way with her. It would have too, if Varric hadn't sent runners to Hawke's estate.

When Hawke arrived Isabela was pretty near passed out drunk and close to be passed around by three guys

Varric walked up when Hawke entered. "I wasn't sure what to do. Just killing the guys won't fix the problem," he said kicking at the dirty floor.

"It's a start." Hawke answered.

She used her fingers and the butt of her sword on the closest guy when she started to move past him.

He said something that sounded a lot like, "Wait your turn." Varric shook his head. That was going to end up making him dead.

Hawke easily gouged out his eyes and dislodged windpipe as she passed. The regulars tried to warn the men. Even gave a description of Hawke in case she showed up. No help was offered. They were warned early on. Isabela was the Champion of Kirkwall's longstanding lover. Anyone dumb enough…well no guard's man or citizen would be dumb enough.

The next three went down fairly easily, and would recover eventually. The last took Hawke by surprise and sheer force.

He came from behind her and kidney punched her already using his blade to cut her belt from behind. He forced her neck down on a table punching his sharp elbow into her neck.

"You may think you can take my boys, but you won't deny me what's mine. I'll get what's coming to me." The thug outweighed her by over twice again her body weight. His mistake was thinking she might be drunk, a target, or have any respect for a life of a man like him.

Hawke snapped her head back and busted his nose fresh blood gushing everywhere. He was stunned and swearing. The sting from a broken nose took even the most skilled and trained warrior a moment to recover. This man was neither. He was just a rapist and bully of women most of his life.

Normally, she would make the killing blow clean and decisive. She didn't even bother with her own blade, she took his from him. It was somewhat dull, as he was lazy and she expected it to be. For the amount of force she needed to use it didn't matter.

She removed his clothing, because she didn't want to accidently miss anything. Knowing full well what he had planned for her and Isabela she didn't think twice when she emasculated him. She threw him towel and let him decide whether or not he would allow himself to bleed out.

Any man found with his privates removed from his body and shoved in his mouth had found the only justice he would ever receive, if he lived.

Even in a tavern like the Hanged Man, that was too much blood and screaming for the local cliental. He was thrown outside. If someone merciful came along they might give him a blade, otherwise they might call a guard's man.

Isabela has moved on to another guy at this point. She's just looking for punishment. Hawke wouldn't treat her like the piece of shit she was. She'd have to find some thug for that.

Hawke pulls Isabela's dagger and shows the young man the handle, he scurries off. The young man recognized Hawke from the man on the floor a few moments ago. He left a piss stain as a scurried off. Isabela took no notice and puked before passing out in Hawke's arms before Hawke took her up stairs. She can't protect her every night forever. She could try to protect her every night in the foreseeable future until, until Isabela stopped being so self-destructive. If that was possible, but Hawke couldn't be around 24/7 and Isabela if she truly sought the punishment she wanted would get her wish. It was Kirkwall after all, the city of chains.

Hawke kisses her gently on the cheek as she laid her down on her bed. Hawke's eyes stung with tears and the back of her throat ached, but she refused to give into emotions right now.

Isabela's clothes were torn and there are scratch marks from dirty fingernails on her skin that were getting infected. Hawke laid her out and undressed her and dutifully cleaned her cleansed her wounds as best she could.

The tears stung, but Isabela couldn't see, so it didn't matter.

The guys weren't the only one abusing Isabela's soft skin. Isabela was covered in dark bruises in varying degrees of healing, some fresh. Cuts are on her arm and inside her thighs made from her own blade. Some were deep. A few are showing signs of infection.

Hawke managed to remain mostly stoic until she was cleaning the weeping self-inflicted wounds inside Isabela's thighs.

These have been covered by her highest boots she's been wearing for weeks that she hasn't taken off in front of Hawke, and from the look of them, even to bathe.

The pain would be a constant reminder, and in it's twisted way a comfort for the hurt that Hawke couldn't bring herself to bear on Isabela.

She knew their child was gone, but it didn't have to be this way.

Passing herself off until she was beaten and raped as often as she could stand, or as often as Hawke could stand. She would punish herself until there was nothing left. She would have done it tonight had Varric not sent a runner.

Isabela took care to make sure none of the regulars would be there. Varric was supposed to be in the Deep Roads and Hawke with him. Only a freak series of events had left them in town for the night. Her pirate queen was too drunk to notice when Varric stepped back into the bar.

He could have stopped it, but where did you stop the killing, where did you even begin it. Isabela intended to do it to herself. It wasn't suicide per se. It was the closest thing to it. She would destroy everything she loved, and make herself unlovable. At least that's what Hawke thought her plan was.

Isabela was too drunk for any form of coherency. She wasn't completely sure, one of the men hadn't given her something else perhaps a root, or potion, or something. Her mind didn't seem quite her own even in her drunken stupor, and Hawke had seen them all. She was pretty far gone from reality. She didn't even know who Hawke was.

"Just get it over with and let me pass out, whoever the fuck you are?" Isabela slurred.

Hawke quite moving about half way across the room to the basin on the way to clean out some of the rags she had used to clean Isabela's wounds.

"If you're too daft to figure this out, just get the fuck out." Isabela was clearly out of her mind. If one of the patrons downstairs had decided to give her a little something extra, as if she needed it, and it hadn't been one of the men she had already taken care of, they would pay a heavy price of taking their own tonic, and being left to their own devices somewhere unsavory.

Isabela threw a dagger at the back of Hawke's head cracking the handle on her skull nearly knocking her out. Hawke's mind had been racing. She had been thinking a million thoughts, and that was not one of them. The dull thud that nearly knocked her out, but it also brought her back to reality.

Even she couldn't stop the reaction of slapping Isabela.

"Like it rough, do you?" Isabela chortled. "Yeah, we could do that too."

Hawke felt shamed that she had slapped her. Too many years of battle. Too many scars. She had just reacted. She had never hit Isabela, outside of play in the bedroom.

Hawke's eye's stung away a tear. She had to get out of there. Hawke managed to blink back her emotions and grab her sword and shield and start for the door. She didn't imagine she would see Isabela on the way there. It was Kirkwall. Even she could walk through the streets unarmed at nights.

In that moment Isabela actually saw Hawke.

She saw Hawke realized she was there, what it meant, and what had happened.

Hawke knew about the men.

Hawke knew about the cutting. Hawke knew everything.

Isabela's staggering drunken act and overture of gaudy sex was taken aback, by the reality of the situation. A reality Isabela hadn't been a part of, and hadn't known had existed. She had just been running on instinct until that moment. Get hurt, maybe get run through, leave this life, and everyone might be the better for it. There hadn't been a Hawke in this life or in her head until this moment.

When there suddenly was, the walls came crashing down. Isabela was destroyed in a whole new way. Not the way she had been seeking, but realizing Hawke had witnessed everything she had been doing, and she didn't know for how long.

Hawke's shield drooped almost to the ground and her blade was loose in her hand.

Both women wished for death and to be outside that room for just an instant, but that wasn't going to happen.

Shame was powerful.

Isabela curled and squatted on the floor, half screeching- half crying. It really didn't much sound like a noise a human could make.

Hawke could have left; Hawke could have gone to her. Instead she stood there dumbly holding her sword and shield, barely holding it.

"I just want to die, Hawke. I never wanted any of this to happen. I never wanted to hurt you. I never wanted this to turn out this way. I don't know how I could have made it turn out any worse."

"Stop it." Hawke's voice was hushed, but it was all she said. Isabela cried like a wounded animal. The sounds were terrifying. Hawke wanted to make them stop. She didn't care how; she just wanted them to stop.

Isabela came up with a worse idea than any running threw Hawke's head. Isabela was so drunk and fucked up on so many drugs; she was out of her skull at best, and emotionally at her worst. Rock bottom is never a good place to be. She grabbed the end of Hawke's blade and partially impaled herself on it. It would have been overly dramatic if she hadn't been quite so successful. She ran it through to almost her back before Hawke even realized what was going on and blood was spilling out of her mouth. "At least make it fast. You can do me that favor." She willed her weight on it pushing it as far as she could.

Hawke was slow to react. Almost nonresponsive. When she finally did it was not good.

Hawke yanked the blade free, when she probably should have left it in and applied pressure around it. Thinking wasn't on the top of Hawke's list. She broke the door down and yelled for Varric who appear nonplussed. Years of being caked in blood together. She managed to strangle Anders name out for a healer. Varric nodded.

Hawke returned to the room, but Isabela was looking pasty already. She was bleeding out fast. What the fuck had she been thinking? What the fuck had any of them been thinking? Isabela was mostly unconscious and Hawke was rocking what she was afraid soon would be her corpse.

How had things gotten like this? They had gotten pregnant. They were going to have a family. Isabela lost the baby trying to save Hawke, or Hawke and Varric. More blood magic. They actually used their child's blood for the ritual. Hawke had faced the demons that might have been their child, and then the world got weird, and strange, and scarier than it had ever been.

She hadn't been able to be there for Isabela. She hadn't been able to be there for herself. Isabela took is as blame; it wasn't. Isabela rushed headlong into anything that would hurt her or get her killed.

All Hawke probably had to do was to explain, but she couldn't manage to do it. She hadn't managed to form words at all. Isabela was nearly dead by Hawke's own sword and Hawke had managed to do nothing.

She couldn't even cry.

Hawke was too broken to move, much less comfort.

"Maker." Hawke whispered. "Please let her live."

Varric took Hawke and pulled her over to the bed and sat her down. "I don't know if he's taking requests today Hawke, but if he owes anyone in this town, he owes you."

"Hawke." The name came from across the room. It floated across from near where Anders was working. He was working silently for once concentrating.

Isabela held out a bloody hand…Hawke slid off the bed and took it. She held the bloody hand close to her own heart. "Yes."

"What did we do? How did we end up here?" Isabela's breathing was labored. Her pulse was erratic. This wasn't just one incident. This had been years in the making. It wasn't linear. It was past, present, and future. It was something Flemmeth had tried to explain when they were at the Eluvian.

They were out of place and time, even now.

Everything was mixed together, the Red Iron, her sister in the Deep Roads, her mother alive, the Inquisitor, being left behind in the Fade once, Ser Stroud another time, Alistair, and Logain another, yet those were names she hadn't met yet.

Their child was gone, but in one place it hadn't even been conceived yet. There was to be a second child that was conceived with Isabela. It was a bit different than the first, but so were the circumstances.

Hawke knew one thing. Isabela didn't die.

Flemmeth said it.

History wasn't done with Hawke. It needed her. It wasn't going to be kind. There were no fluffy bunnies and ponies, but she needed Isabela. As long as history needed her, Isabela would live.

Time worked in an odd fashion. It seemed like Isabela's heartbeat stopped Anders stopped. Only Hawke could see or move. She went to kiss Isabela, but there was no time, only her, and a laugh in the darkness.

"We really do have to stop meeting like this. People will start to talk." Flemmeth spoke.

"You have to stop this." Hawke said.

"Believe me when I say, I would if I could, but I can't." Flemmeth smirked. "You seemed to have weathered the storm though.

"It's time magic." Hawke turned away form Isabela and stood up to her full height staring at Flemeth.

Her white hair glistening she gave a long slow clap. "Beautifully played. But I have nothing to do with it. I'm just along for the ride. Just like you. History does like you. You realize, of course, your girlfriend should be dead about a dozen times over by the time all this is said and done."

"And your point?" Hawke stewed at what was going on.

"I'm amazed. Your pirate queen knows how to pick a good woman." Flemmeth laughed haughtily.

"I can see the Inquisition. The hole in the Fade. My death on one side, my life on the other."

"It's annoying, but you get used to it." At least you only have one lifetime. You can see so many possibilities, but only one path shall you walk in your life. Only one set of choices will you make." Flemmeth laughed. "My money is on the girlfriend. She's got potential to comeback every time."

"Will this ever stop?" Hawke asked.

"This?" Flemmeth looked around. "The time rifts? " She picked up a peach of questionable origin off the table and bit into it. "Yes. They will stop or tear Thedas apart. My bet is on the former." You're near the epicenter of one. It will go away." The random choice the Inquisitor makes between you and the Grey Warden…it just that…random…it is as random as the Inquisitor…dwarf, elf, Quanari, male, female, it's whatever is rolled at the exact moment.

"Just like not all the Hawkes are alike. I prefer this one. I like the funny, banter, witty one. There is a version of you that ends up with Merrill, BTW. "

"Merrill?" Hawke scoffs.

"I know it's hard to believe, but there are versions of you who are a sucker for the big eyes. There are even versions of you that are straight." Flemmeth looks at her mocking a gasp.

"Stop it." Hawke says.

"Fenris seems to be pretty fun, but what you see in that Anders."

"I do have to eat again, in this lifetime, you know." It's not going to stop for you Hawke, but know this, after the Inquisition, at least it gets better, and you might get the joys of being a parent, yet. Look at the wonders it did me…by the way, I wouldn't assume through magical conception that Isabela would be the only one who could carry a baby to term."

"Please, stop right there."

"Yes, it is too soon." Flemmeth said. "I am off again. I hope to not see you again too soon, if I'm lucky and your lucky ever again in this lifetime Hawke. Go to her. Your pirate queen will live."

Flemmeth always one for an exit dashed on a hint of roguish smoke and Hawke retuned to Isabela's side taking Isabela's hand in her own. Isabela weakly held on with her hand until she passed out from pain.

Isabela's labored breathing settled down as she passed out and regained a little color.

Anders started to speak, but Hawke waved him off and she lifted Isabela onto the bed across the room.

Varric took his cue and he ushered Blondie out the door and left Isabela and Hawke alone in the room.

Hawke was pretty sure Isabela would remember very little of what happened. Hawke opened a shoulder and Isabela snuggled in unaware of most of the past few weeks. It was a dull stabbing pain, nothing more.

Unfortunately for Hawke, she remembered every minute detail of everything now. The good and the bad: even how happy Isabela had been.

How Isabela had come with the others when Hawke and Varric had been captured for a simple ransom. The idiot mage who had tried blood magic to turn the tides when Hawkes people easily cut a swath through the would-be kidnappers.

He had slashed blindly and caught Isabela in the gut. Fetal blood: a premium in blood magic. It was one hell of a demon, Hawke's own personal child/demon. It hadn't been pretty. It had killed it's master instantly and all the other ransomers. It thought Hawke might let it live.

It had taken an appearance that looked quite like hers. It had been powerful, artful, deadly, and had nearly taken Isabela with it when it died.

The ending result had been Isabela at the tavern weeks later and Hawke paying a visit tonight. Everyone had been shaken to the core by that one.

Terminating the pregnancy and demon at the same time had all but destroyed Hawke and Isabela for different reasons. The loss was different. The baby would have been viable, outside the womb.

Time magic seemed a relief.

Isabela stirred next to Hawke. This Isabela knew who Hawke was, but thankfully didn't seem to have the memories of last night.

"What happened?" Isabela seemed truly confused.

"Something bad. It's Kirkwall. We all live to fight another day." She would mention to Varric and Anders to say nothing. Sometimes it was best not to remember the nightmares. Hawke had enough for them both.

Isabela looked at the bandages covering her wounds. I've been gutted like a fish.

"Be glad you're not a fish. They may not have tried to throw you back." Hawke smiled.

"Ass." Isabela shoved her and immediately wished she hadn't. "Holy crap."

"More like holy Macarole." Hawke couldn't help but giggle.

"That's it. Get out of here…Ow" She swore under her breath.

"When you're strong enough to throw me out; I'll leave. Until then, I promise to nurse you back to health, against your will of course."

"I can't tell if it sounds awful or feels worse." Isabela swore at her bandaged stomach and Hawke offered her a health potion. "Better." She muttered.

"What the hell happened to my head? This doesn't feel like drink." Isabela started.

"Also don't let strange men poison you. It's bad for the metabolism." Hawke smirked.

"I suppose you are my knight in shining armor." Isabela grumbled. "Is this the part where I'm supposed to tell you I don't deserve you, or some crap like that?"

"Probably."

"Ugh. You're encouragable." She shoved at Hawke and missed throwing herself across Hawke's body instead.

"I could make this work. Been looking through the dictionary, again?" Hawke said wrapping her arms around her. Glad that with her memory gone, she had the illusion of being able to keep her safe.

"Let's see if we can find a way to get you transport across town to my estate." Hawke said.

"I'm a shit. I'm going to lay here and die in the Hanged Man as all shits do." Isabela muttered. She snuggled herself over Hawke's body.

Then we die by my cooking or the Hanged Man's…or we can have Bodan's cooking.

"Right. I'll work on that. Maker, I think I'm going to die." Isabela whimpered into Hawke's chest.

It was only three weeks ago Isabela had said the same thing under very different circumstances.

"Not today, my love. Not today."

It was only three weeks ago Isabela managed to look radiant even after puking for ten minutes straight.

Inside Hawke's Estate the sun was moving into the late morning. Isabela staggered her way out of the privy and collapsed across Hawke's bed.

"I think I'm going to die."

Hawke was trying out a new greave made of dragon bone with new two-handed hilt. Hawke wasn't one to preen in the mirror but Isabela was watching Hawke go through different stances watching her maneuver a favorite blade in her hand.

Isabela mindfully chomped on fresh mint Bodan had brought in from the garden. It was soothing and quite tasty. Not quite as tasty as watching Hawke who was quite consumed in the way the hilt was moving in the greave and the balance of the weapon was changing with the new hilt.

Unlike Hawke's regular performance in battle she was wearing only a light shirt and halter, greaves and small clothes. Isabela was enjoying the full performance of Hawkes muscles.

If Hawke had noticed she might have been annoyed or even embarrassed. Isabela was hungrily drinking in the sight. Hawke had worked up quite a sweat even without full gear. She always put everything into her performance, something Isabela always enjoyed.

Hawke was working the blade on either side of her body trying to get a feel for the new balance and seeing if she really felt she could commit to a set of new armor. Sure it looked fantastic, but the real trick was the performance.

Isabela was all about the performance. When Hawke timed out one of her signature stabilizing moves Isabela knew she would hold it for 15 seconds, she always did.

Hawke's short hair was drenched with sweat, but Isabela didn't mind. She moved up behind her sliding her body behind Hawke's. Pushing her face next to Hawke's looking at her in the mirror.

Hawke had been thinking about anything but sex; however, that was before Isabela moved her hands from behind Hawke down her abs pushing past her small clothes.

"Haven't you ever wanted to watch the performance I get every time? It is an awfully nice mirror. Think you can hold that pose?" Isabela without a moment's hesitation slipped from behind between Hawke's legs and cut off her small clothes with a handy dagger

"Isabela." Hawke was clearly taken by surprise, but too intrigued to move. Scratch that, too turned on to move.

"Yes" Isabela purred back. "Why don't you hold that pose? It'll give you something to do while I enjoy my work. I have always loved to watch your abs get a good workout, but a good work out during an orgasm, what could be better?"

Hawke obliged keeping the heavy weapon perfectly still as Isabela flicked her tongue across her clit. Hawke moaned and she could feel a rush of wetness practically pour down on Isabela.

"Tasty, but Hawke, I'd really like it if you'd enjoy the show. I mean the mirror is right there. Think you can manage to enjoy watching me work for a change?" Hawke finally let her gaze drop to Isabela's tongue, and she was putting on quite a show for Hawke. The demonstration didn't need to be so elaborate to be felt, but if did look amazing watching Isabela's tongue dance across her in the most intimate way a woman could taste and touch another woman.

Isabela got a little extra surprise she wanted, a tremor from a Hawke. Just the slightest tremor from her leg and her abs. Yes, she was wet and excited, but to have her on the verge of losing control.

"No touching." Isabela teased. Just keep your hands where I can see them. Positioned on the sword Hawke was having a slight trouble concentrating. The pull from her core and her overriding need to touch Isabela made it more than a bit difficult to hold this position. Isabela was enjoying every moment of it.

"It's harder than it looks, huh? Only because you are you Hawke. Trust me, most people would have no trouble just being serviced, but you, you want to touch and kiss and reciprocate. It's practically killing you.

"I could keep you like this all day. It could be a really fun day."

"Please." Hawke spat. She was shaking with effort, and Isabela was doing having a hard time not letting her lover come. It was just too much fun to tease her. By the Maker she was hot. Still she did ask nicely.

"Well…you did ask so sweetly." Isabela lapped noisily at Hawke's clit, which would be enough to send her over the edge on her own, Hawke was sensitive to anything when she didn't have anything to distract her, say anything to do to Isabela's body. Still, Isabela reached inside her slowly pushing a steady pace at her g spot why lapping at her clit increasing the pressure ever so slightly.

Hawke roared in response to all the stimulation and felt like she was coming from every possible direction. Isabela let her ridge through her clitoral orgasm and finally ditch the sword for the comfort of the back of her head and kept keeping pace with the deeper orgasm she knew she could get from her g-spot if she wasn't wound too tight, and even if she was she might trust her enough to ride through a few.

Hawke just let herself come in sheet after sheet of unexpected orgasm, finishing on the bed somehow with Isabela on top of her walls gripping rhythmically at Isabela. Hawke was spent in a boneless heap.

Isabela didn't really know which of the two of them was the more pleased.

As Hawke's body gave way to the last rack of orgasmic twitch she fell backwards against the bed dragging the Rivani pirate on top of her.

Isabela loved it when Hawke just wanted to feel her and just be with her. Hawke would be sated for sometime. Isabela couldn't have been happier. She didn't know what family was. In reality, she had never really been part of one as far as she was concerned, but if being in one meant being with Hawke, it was a hell of a way to start.

***
Hawke mind was reeling and mostly trying to forget the events of the last 24 hours. These attempts never works and only stained her memory with perfect recall.

At least Isabela seemed robbed of her memory. Hawke couldn't say she wasn't grateful that the nightmare was mostly gone. She'd have to tell Varric and the boys, though she noticed even they would forget things from time to time. Varric seemed the least effected, but everyone was being effected by something.

The events had been horrible, and she decided she didn't care if she was the only one that bore the brunt of them. Usually it was her and another. She would remember and Varric, or she and Aveline, but Merrill would have no idea what she was talking about even if she had been in the thickest of the firefights with them.

Hawke didn't know what it meant. She knew things like this always came back to bite her in the ass, but for now, she was happy that Isabela seemed to remember little.

Isabela trustingly snuggled onto Hawke's chest. She was sure it couldn't have been that comfortable because Hawke hadn't fully disrobed, but after the last few weeks it might have felt like paradise for all she knew.

The Rivani didn't even have a crease in her brow. She seemed perfectly at peace. Hawke been through enough of Isabela's nightmare's of childhood rapes, beatings, and general misfortunes to know that a good night's sleep was a rarity to be enjoyed.

Dueling had helped, but at night, every weakness you ever had plagued you. Over the years Isabela's nightmares had subsided until…well...the last three weeks had been bad.

Hawke couldn't stop the screaming nightmares or whatever Isabela saw, but wouldn't tell Hawke.

Isabela was truly terrified by something, it wasn't tangible like a rape or a beating. It was something else.

It was something scarier and unfathomable.

If they were forgotten for some reason…

Isabela nuzzled in and Hawke gave in to fatigue and collapse. As luck would have it, Hawke fell into a dreamless sleep, which was the best she had learned to hope for.

Chapter Text

Hawke sat across from Dorian. He looked comfortable in one of her well-appointed chairs from her estate. For all his flash and flourish, nothing he said made sense. Really nothing.

"You can acting like you waiting for applause." Hawke said as Dorian finished his tale of time magic.

"Funny, that's what Inquisitor said when she met me." Dorian smiled."

"Must be your unending charm." Hawke said without missing a beat. "What's an Inquisitor?""

"Ahhh well, yes, that's in your future. I'm in your future actually." Dorian picked at a piece of link on his clothes."

"Lovely." Hawke just fell back on the bed exhausted. Time magic sounded worse than blood magic and this pedantic little fruit was driving her mad. No direct answers just flippant little sidesteps. "My future is filled with Tiventer cream cakes, I'm sorry does that affront? Tiventer cream cakes with an extreme sense of fashion."

"Well, there you go then." Dorian seemed pleased with the final response. "It will be fine in the end. It sorts itself out. It gets worse the closer you get to the rift, but we do manage to close it. Problem solved."

Hawke roared flipping an idle piece of furniture out of the way and covering the ground between Dorian and herself in the three steps. Dorian didn't quite have time to reach for his staff before she easily kicked it away."

"In the last year, do you know how many of my friends I've watched died and reappear as though nothing has happened. My lover skewered herself on my own blade. No memory. Not even the people that healed her. Not even the people that were there. I am the only one who remembers anything. You say time magic and laugh it off as if it were nothing. If the future needs me so badly that your Inquisitor sent me back, or Varric, or whoever the fuck, I suggest you explain that discrepancy now." Hawke was short of breath but her mind was ragged, and the blade wasn't exactly steady either. Dorian was nicked and bleeding."

"Those events. The main events, like the one you described with your lover. They probably never happened in the main time-stream, or the one where one of your companions died, but shows back up to fight with you, and no one has a memory of it but you. It was an off-shoot. An alternate reality. It never happened to anyone else. You remember what might have been, a tangent. They ride the rifts. You remember them. All of them. Time magic is new. It is also dangerous. There seems to be one person that either exists or will exist with an intact working knowledge of what is or should be. I can explain no further, there is no more to explain."

Dorian had spilled out as much information as quickly as he could to mollify Hawke.

He rather liked her at Skyhold, but clearly she was more tortured than she let on.

This was the right Hawke though from his timeline: Isabela was her lover, Bethany, her sister, was a Grey Warden through an unusual set of circumstances, the Chantry had yet to blow up, but that was inevitable as was the way she was to handle it.

Hawke, though beautiful if you went for that sort of thing (which he didn't), did look haggard and spent. This time magic was eating away at her long before it should be. Why was she sensitive to it? Was there a way to make her to forget like the others.

On a more timely note, was there a way to get her not to kill him in the next minute or so? The pressure she had on the blade against his throat had not lessened, and she seemed to be on the verge of a breakdown. He was rather on the wrong side of the knife for that.

"Hawke." Dorian would be ever grateful for Isabela's timely entrance.

Isabela surveyed the situation quickly. If Hawke wanted someone dead she killed them, without hesitation, ever. Hesitation was not part of her makeup, which meant the man she was dealing with gave her a conflict in her nature, and probably didn't need to die for some reason or another, i.e. Hawke would regret killing him, and that meant less sex and fun, which had been sparse enough lately.

"Go." Hawke said.

Dorian didn't need to be told twice. He grabbed his staff and on his exit said, "I will find a way to make this better for you Hawke."

"Getting serviced by men now? Thought you might be up to something new. I'm game." Isabela smiled her normal rueful playful smile. "

"No. Why don't you go to the Blooming Rose? Have whatever you want. It's on me." Hawke never even looked up."

"A tempting offer, especially on your coin, only I didn't come all the way back to Kirkwall to go to the whore house, fine as its services might be. They are mighty fine. Might be more interested if you were to come with…" Isabela gave a half bow with a bit of flourish."

"I can't." Hawke started.

'Can't never could, and you can, it's not like we haven't been there plenty of times in the past. Whatever happened a month ago, I believe whatever you dreamed or thought you saw, you thought it was real, but I'm still here…" Isabela was tired and she really wanted sex, but she really wanted it from Hawke. If she wanted it from anyone else, it would have been easy.

Hawke wished her gone. It wasn't that easy. She'd wished her gone years ago.

The Champion of Kirkwall had been living in a world of nightmares whether it be day or night for months, and there didn't seem anything anyone could do much about it. She could fight and kill things all day long, but nothing helped. No matter how many demons she slayed more waited for her in her sleep.

Isabela had taken to breaking her cardinal rule and been staying at the estate, though she doubted Hawke knew. Hawke never woke up from her night terrors, not fully. What good does it do you to be able to fight and slay anything awake and make every demon tremble if your mind can take you terrible places at night.

Hawke slept little, but it was painful to watch her sleep.

Isabela would gladly slay anything, but whatever haunted her mind was not within her Pirate Queen's reach.

Dorian walked back in looking well rested…and very different, much more confident. Not at all like the man who had left moments ago.

"You seem different." Isabela smirked.

"Charming and more good-looking?" Dorian asked.

"Older and calmer." She laughed.

"I knew I needed a better wrinkle cream."

"Believe me. This won't help with your real life Hawke, but it will help with the thinks that aren't supposed to be happening around it. You should just experience regular misery now, instead of tenfold." He held out an interesting bauble on a chain. "It will keep the ripple effects from touching your mind. It's the least I could do considering."

"Considering what?" Isabela asked.

"Now, now, now can't go around giving away all my future secrets." Dorian opened up a black vortex in the lobby smiled and stepped through and was gone in a flash.

"Well the future looks very gay and festive." Hawke managed, though she looked pale as she said it.

"Since your future seems determined to save you why don't we give it a go?" Isabela easily slipped the necklace over Hawke's head.

Hawke had an edge about her that looked like she had been on the edge of hypothermia mixed with starvation and scurvy. Whatever had happened to her last had not gone well.

However.

However, something changed.

Something of the old Hawke seemed to have returned. A Hawke Isabela had been missing for quite sometime. Her face seemed more relaxed than Isabela remembered seeing it in the better part of a year.

"I can see the difference.' Hawke said grasping at nothing in particular. "The memories, I have both, but the others are greyed out, not as vivid. It seems like they…there is a true course…and what might have been.

None of you were meant to die, at least no one was meant to die yet.

And the child…the baby…that was meant to be, but maybe not yet." Hawke realized she was probably making no sense, but at least she felt relived even if she was going on like a maniac. "Sometimes it's a question of when, not if…that's a when…it's not now…"

Even though Hawke was rambling, it was the first time Isabela had seen her a peace of any kind. She'd take a chance at mental peace if it meant getting a piece back of the woman she loved. Liked. Dammit.

Though sex was never far from Isabela's mind, it couldn't have been further from Hawke's mind.

Isabela crashing her body into her kissing her wasn't exactly where her next thought was going, but there was a comfortable familiarity to it. There was also a very familiar missing reaction as she felt a throb between her legs. When was the last time she had, had sex? She didn't want to know. She was sure Isabela could tell her exactly.

The fogginess of her mind and the mental demons that had been haunting her slipped away for the moment. Isabela was pleasantly surprised when Hawke took control of the situation and twisted her arm behind her back bringing her up to her full height with a twinge of pain that Hawke knew she liked. Isabela gasped involuntarily. There was no conflict in Hawke's eyes. Just deep seated lust and passion for times passed.

Hawke did slow the pace as she so loved to do to tease Isabela. For once, Isabela didn't mind, drinking in the full deep kiss remembering Hawke's old confidence before the conflicted Hawke. She could feel no difference. When Hawke pull away from the Rivani it was everything the pirate had been missing. She didn't know if it was temporary or not, but she had to have Hawke now.

Hawke seemed happy to oblige.

She tossed the pirate onto the bed easily from where they were. She cocked her head and looked at her. "Miss me that much?" she asked.

"Missed the sex more." Isabela said, never one for subtlety. She clambered to all fours as Hawke prowled around the exterior of the bed. If she was going to pounce, Maker let it be soon. It had been far too long. Love was complicated. Far too complicated for Isabela's taste, but she was still there. She hoped the sex was worth it.

When Hawke pounced and pinned her to the bed, she was pretty sure it was going to be worth the terrible wait.

Hawke had always been a tiger between the sheets, as she had explained to half of Kirkwall, and the entire reason she had come back to the city of chains. When she felt Hawke's weight on top of her she let out a low moan, she had gone from garden variety walking through the room to soaking through her smalls in a few minutes.

The Rivani felt her brush past her lips and sink her teeth into her soft neck moving off to her right ear. Hawke brushed her right hand against her already soaked smalls, she pushed a finger passed them as she nibbled at her ear.

It wasn't fair. Hawke knew how to make her come almost immediately. It wouldn't sate her; it would just make her want more. Hawke's breath was ragged in her ear spurring her to a quick orgasm and the makings of a long night night.

She could have removed her smalls, but for some reason now and again, she liked to have Isabela come in her pants, as it were, usually she saved it for a public screwing, but she wondered what Hawke had in mind. It had been too long and she wouldn't last the first round anyway. Hawke knew it, whispering in her ear, "come for me".

Isabela was slick with come, so much so it took Hawke a moment to find her aching clit. Isabela practically screamed when she did. She stifled her cries with kiss, also one of Hawke's signature moves. Isabela had never been able to concentrate on a kiss in the condition, but Hawke loved to do it anyway.

Isabela would have easily come in a few seconds with Hawke just touching her, but Hawke wanted more. She knew she had been neglectful, and wanted to taste her. Almost before Isabela realized what was happening Hawke ripped her smalls off and had her hot tongue licked slowly against her clit. Isabela grabbed her short hair with both hands more or less just trying to hang on for the ride, short though it would be.

"Hawke" she managed to strangle out her her name.
Hawke's pace was spot on, Isabela wouldn't last, but she was letting her enjoy as much as she could. "I'm sorry, I've missed you Isabela." Is all Hawke managed to say before Isabela's world went black then broke into a world of color and coughing.

The orgasm was incredible, but not as incredible as the thought of having Hawke back. Hawke's mouth was covering hers. She could taste herself on Hawke's lips. "It'll be okay." Hawke whispered in her ear. "I'm back. I'll be back. I can see what's real now, and curse the bastard that did this time magic thing."

Isabela really only heard the first part. When she looked into Hawke's eyes, she just saw Hawke. The haunted desperate woman with the weight of the world on her shoulders was gone. She might carry that weight, but the effect was gone.

Isabela hadn't realized how she had let herself slip into hopelessness. Her lover was back; she thought she was gone forever. Maker was she crying? Hawke pretended not to notice, perhaps she should too.

"What happened?" Isabela choked out.

"Have you really ever wanted to know?" Hawke asked.

"No. Not really, not as long as you're okay."

"I'm okay. Let's just say the future is no more fun than the past, but you get stay if you want. That's all I really know." Hawke said. She was pretty exhausted with too much knowledge, but it was at least prioritized, and she had a neglected lover to look after.

"I want." Isabela said simply. "At least for now. I mean you might get boring or something. I might prefer a blonde…you never know." Isabela laughed.

"Looks like I have my work cut out for me."
***

If you have been waiting on me readers...

I apologize. I was very ill in all of Nov and Dec, it finally got the better of me.

I lived.

I am woefully behind in life and deadlines, but there are wosethings;)