Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Sing your death song. And die like a hero going home.”
                                  - Chief Aupumut, Mohican Nation

“You can do this Will, come on. Let’s get your helmet on.”

His father’s voice was confident. It always was. Will knew his dad was just trying to reassure him, but he probably was confident. To John it was just a couple meters down to the hatch opening, then a quick climb to the bottom of the ladder and the battery was right there. To Will, he was climbing into the water…under the water…and he was so scared he couldn’t even answer his father. To be fair, John thought Will had passed all the tests to come to space. But regardless of what his mother had told him, Will knew he had failed the test in the hyperbolic chamber, almost exactly what his father was asking him to do now. And this was not a test.

Then Judy ran by. “I’ve got this squirt,” she said. Her helmet was on, and she was almost to the water.

But John reached out and grabbed her by the shoulder, pulling her to a stop. “No. You aren’t doing this. You can’t fit in the hatch.”

She tried to pull away from him. “There’s more than one way in.”

“You’re not listening, Judy; you’re not doing this.”

“You can’t make him do this, Dad!” She was tugging away, but John had a strong grip on her suit.

“This is the safest way, Judy,” he said. “These are the kinds of choices I make every day. I wouldn’t put my son in danger if I thought it was the wrong decision. He can get down the ladder, get the battery and get right back up. It would take you too long to get around to the airlock, and it’s too dangerous. The water could start freezing before you got out.”

As the two of them stood there arguing, Will looked at Judy and realized his father was right. And Judy would do anything to protect him. She always had. Even if it put her in danger. But he was a member of the family too, and he couldn’t always let her take care of him. He strapped the helmet on and stood, trying to stay calm.

“I’ll do it, Judy. I’m okay.” He walked over to the two of them.

“Will, are you sure?” It was Penny. She was still sitting with Maureen, who was leaning back, her eyes closed, in pain from her broken leg.

“Will, No!” Maureen’s eyes were open now. They had thought she was asleep or unconscious.

Will looked over at her. Between his mom and Judy, he was never in much danger back on Earth. But they weren’t on Earth.

“Dad’s right,” Will said. “It…it makes the most sense. I’m the only one who can fit.” He tried to sound brave, but he was sure they heard the fear in his voice.

Judy stepped up to Will and put both hands on his shoulders. “Will, you don’t have to do this.”

“Thanks Judy…for always taking care of me. But I do have to do this.”

She hugged him. To Will, it felt like she didn’t want to let go. But she finally did. “Okay. Dad and I’ll be right by the opening,” she said.

They walked over to the hole, and looked down into the cold water. Since the ship had sunk, it was a couple meters under the surface to the top hatch now. John dropped to his knees in front of Will, while Judy did the same next to him. John checked his suit and helmet to make sure it was tight. “Okay, Will. Just float to the hatch opening, then climb down slowly. The spare battery is just to your left in the storage closet.”

“John, no!” Maureen yelled.

“Maureen," John called over to her. "Will's right, it makes the most sense."

“I'll be fine, Mom,” Will said. Then he turned back to his dad and Judy. “I know what it looks like. I’ll get it.”

John smiled at him. Will looked down into the deep water, hesitated.

“You got this squirt,” Judy said, placing a hand on his shoulder.

He sat down, put his legs into the water, looked at his sister and gave her a nervous smile. “I’ll be right back. Don’t go anywhere.”

She smiled and hugged him again quickly.

He slipped into the water, then floated down until he felt the Jupiter 2 under his feet. He paused for a second before stepping into the opening, and climbed slowly down the ladder. It was so dark.

“Helmet light, Will,” John’s voice came through the speaker.

“Oh, yeah,” he said. He touched the control on his suit sleeve and the light popped on, illuminating the dark water. It took him four or five minutes to make it to the deck.

“You’re doing great, squirt,” his sister’s voice came over the speaker. “You okay?”

When he didn’t answer at first she said, “Will?”

“Ye…yeah. Yeah.” He looked up and saw his dad and sister looking back down at him. He smiled, trying to reassure them he was not as frightened as he sounded.

“Okay, Will,” John said. “Don’t waste any time. Get in and get out.”

He looked toward the storage room door. It was so dark, and the light illuminated the room less than a meter in front of him. It wasn’t hard to imagine the freezing water was populated by any number of amphibious alien creatures.

“Will, calm down,” Judy said. “You’re breathing too hard. Take slow, deep breaths and calm down.”

“Okay...Okay.” He concentrated. Slowed his breathing.

“That’s better, Will,” Judy said. “Now let’s do this, alright, you and me together. I’m right here with you. Let’s walk forward, one step at a time.”

John was in charge, and could tell Will he had to do this, but the thing was, Judy knew him. More than his dad ever would, probably, since John had been gone so often during the years that really counted. She knew he needed her in his ear. With him. “Okay…I’m going,” he said.

“Great. One step at a time,” Judy’s voice was comforting to him. She was with him. He walked slowly toward the storage room.

“Will, you there?” John asked. “We can’t see you now.”

“Yeah. I’m at the storage room now.”

When he pushed the door open and looked inside it was a mess. The shelves had all emptied into the middle of the floor. There were wires and rope and debris all over the room. “There’s stuff everywhere,” he said.

“You know what you’re looking for, right?” John asked.

“Yeah…it’s just…so much junk. Wait. I see it. It’s kinda buried.”

“Will, don’t get tangled in anything,” his father said.

“Okay. I’m going in. You here, Judy?”

“Right here, little brother.”

“Okay.” He walked forward. He stepped around as much of the debris as possible, but he had to stop and move some metal boxes out of the way. The battery was under a large spool that held copper wire. The spool wasn’t heavy in the water, but the wires had come loose, and it was cumbersome trying to lift it and get the wires out of the way at the same time.

“I’ve got it,” he finally announced.

“Great,” Judy said in his ear. “Now get out of there.”

“I’m coming.” He turned back toward the door, then felt something grab his suit. “No!” He yelled and pulled away.

“Will, what happened!” Judy’s panicked voice came in his ear.

“I…I got my suit caught on the shelf. I thought something grabbed me.”

“Okay, Will,” John said. “Get back to the ladder.”

“Okay, I’m going.”

He walked to the ladder, stepped on the bottom rung, said, “Something’s wrong. I think my suit’s losing pressure. It’s getting harder to breathe. And cold.”

“Will,” John said. “Get out of there. You tore your suit.”

“Okay! Okay!”

“Will, listen to me,” Judy said. “You’re panicking. You’re breathing too hard. You need to conserve your air. Now climb up. You and me. Step.”

“Okay.”

“Don’t talk, Will,” Judy said. “Just climb.”

He began to climb up the ladder, trying to control his panic and conserve oxygen. But he remembered what his mother had told his dad. John’s suit had a tear in it, and he would die in minutes if he tried to go into the water.

“We see you, Will,” John said. “Let’s go, climb out of there.”

It was hard to grab the rungs above him with one hand while carrying the battery. Judy could see he was struggling with it. “Drop the battery, Will. Swim up!”

“No. Need it.” He climbed from one rung to the next with one hand, pulling himself into the ladder each time so he wouldn’t fall backwards as he let one rung go and reached for the next. It was painstakingly slow. He was getting colder by the second and it was getting harder to breathe.

“Climb, Will!” Judy yelled.

“Will, when you get out of the hatch, push off with your feet,” John said. “Just a couple meters and I can get you and pull you out.”

But as Will looked up, he saw Judy put her helmet on and jump in the water, and was quickly standing on the Jupiter 2, outside the hatch. “Climb a couple more feet and I can grab you, Will,” she said, calmly. She was scared to death for her little brother, but trying to keep him from panicking.

He was halfway up the ladder. He stepped on the next rung, looked up to the light where he could see his dad on the surface past Judy and his sister lying by the hatch, reaching down toward him. He took another step, struggling with the battery. Judy was nodding her head. “You’re almost out, Will. You did it. Now climb up and give me your hand.”

He was quickly running out of oxygen, and knew he needed to get out of the water. He began to take another step, but before his foot could reach the next rung, he was pulled to a stop. He looked down. The copper wire was tightly wrapped around his ankle, and trailed behind him into the cold depths. He saw it tangled around one of the rungs below him.

He tried to tug his leg, but the wire just tightened. “No,” he said. He could tell his voice came out small. He looked up.

Penny and his mother were at the opening in the ice now, next to John. They were all calling to him, everyone yelling, “climb!”

“Will, what’s wrong?” Judy asked.

He looked up at her, then back at the wire, wrapped around his leg. Will wasn’t the normal eleven year boy, and as scared as he was, he quickly calculated his options. If he dropped the battery now, he might be able to get down to where the wire was wrapped in the ladder, untangle it and climb out, then he could go back for the battery if they could quickly fix his suit. But if he couldn’t untangle the wire he would die anyway, then his family would die. And if they couldn’t fix his suit before the ice froze, they would all die together. There was only one way to guarantee his family survived. He made the hardest decision of his life.

He gripped the battery strap tightly with one hand, stepped up one more rung with his free leg, stretched as far as he could with the battery, then pushed it up. He could only get it as high as his head with one hand, so he said, "Judy, when I push the battery up, grab it…and…I’ll be able to make it.”

“Drop it!” Judy shouted. “Drop it and push yourself off!”

But Will knew it was too late for him. No sense in them dying too, he reasoned. He was crying and he knew Judy would be able to tell. He stretched the battery as high as he could with one hand, while pulling his body into the ladder. Then he released his grip on the rung, and immediately pressed the battery over his head with both hands before he fell back.

His sister reached her hand out until she could barely grab the battery strap, lifted it from Will’s outstretched arms, quickly turned and handed it up to John, then her hand was back reaching toward her brother. But she saw he had fallen backwards off the ladder and was drifting back down. 

“Will,” Judy said.  "Swim now, you don’t need to climb! I can get you.”

“I…I can’t. My leg’s caught…I….”

He could see his family gathered around the opening, shouting to him, hands reaching down. “I love you guys so much,” he said.

“No, Will!” Judy cried.

“It’s okay, Judy. It’s okay.” He didn’t know if he spoke the words aloud or just thought them, as the light began to fade. He was vaguely aware that John had put his helmet on and jumped in the water and was lying on top of the Jupiter now, next to Judy, trying to reach him. But they were getting further away. And for the first time he could remember, he wasn’t frightened. He was calm.

The last thing he heard was Judy’s voice in his ear, begging him to swim.

The last thing he thought was, I wonder what happens next?

“There is no scatheless rapture. Love and time put me in this condition. I am leaving soon for the Nightland, where all the ghosts of men and animals yearn to travel. We’re called to it. I feel it pulling at me, same as everyone else. It is the last unmapped country, and a dark way getting there. A sorrowful path. And maybe not exactly Paradise at the end. The belief I’ve acquired over a generous and nevertheless inadequate time on earth is that we arrive in the afterlife as broken as when we departed from the world. But, on the other hand, I’ve always enjoyed a journey.”
                                                                                                                                          —Charles Frazier, Thirteen Moons

Chapter Text

5 Days Before Christmas

What if I don’t go back?

Will woke with a heavy hand on his chest. He looked up at Robot. Will’s eyes were wide, and he was sweating. He could sense the concern in his best friend. “It was a dream, that’s all,” Will said, trying to console Robot.

“Family,” Robot said.

“I know. I miss them too. It was just a dream. Nothing to worry about.”

Robot’s hand was still on his chest. There was gentle pressure. He wasn’t trying to restrain Will, it was as if Robot was just letting him know he was there. Like he had been since the tree. When Robot didn’t remove his hand, Will knew he was really worried.

“Seriously, Robot, it was only a dream.”

“Family,” Robot repeated.

Now Will thought he understood what the problem was. It wasn’t the bad dream he had had of going down in the hatch, and getting caught. It was the end of the dream. When he seemed almost comforted by drifting down into the abyss. And he knew why this was Robot’s concern.

“I know we have to go back soon. We will, after we check this out, okay? I mean, the planet really exists, and pretty much where it was supposed to be. More or less. And, it supports life.”

“Family.”

“I know. Really. Don’t worry. We’ll go check it out, see if there is any sign of sentient life, and leave. If we see anything worth investigating further, we’ll come back after Christmas. Deal?”

Robot didn’t answer, he just kept looking at his friend.

“Look, Robot. I know I didn’t exactly tell them the truth. But they would never have let me go if I told them what I was looking for. They just wouldn’t believe it. And I would be studying history at a desk in a square building made from a three D printer. Even the buildings in the colony are fake. After the last three years, that would be like torture to me. But what if the stories turned out to be true? I mean, isn’t that the way to learn history?”

Robot didn’t answer, but he removed his hand and Will slowly rose from the bed. “I’m gonna take a shower, then we’ll get going, okay?”

Robot didn’t say anything, but he didn’t have to. It was becoming easier and easier for Will to know what he was thinking, even when they weren’t connected.

While Will was in the shower he thought about his dream. It was frightening at first, and almost too horrible to think about. And so real. Like he was actually in the water. He could still sense the fear. But then it had changed, and his final thought was one of comfort. Maybe, almost—wonder. And as he woke he remembered thinking: What if I don’t go back?

And he felt that was what had Robot so concerned, and why he had tried to comfort him. Because, truth be told, that part wasn’t really a dream. It was an idea that just seemed to enter his brain that he couldn’t get out. Penny called them brain worms. Like a song you just can’t stop singing. “It’s a small world after all,” Will hummed and smiled. Let’s see how long that sticks around today.

But this particular brain worm seemed to come back often. It had started about the third week out. He and Robot had just left the first planet in the galaxy they had landed on. The planet revolved around the third star. The mystery star that Will had hoped to find, though he was still surprised when they did.

They knew the second star was there. The dwarf. It had been discovered in eighteen sixty two, when a telescope was developed that was powerful enough to see it from Earth. But Will was surprised to find its density was accurate, according to the stories. What he was not prepared for was the third star, the invisible one, though in the nineteen seventies, a few astronomers had begun to discuss the possibility.

When the Hubble telescope mapped the system, and the third star was not discovered, most astronomers thought that was the end of it. But when Will read there were almost a billion kilometers in this solar system the Hubble did not map, he thought there was still a possibility. A billion kilometers might sound like a lot, but of course in space, it really wasn’t. Still, it was plenty big enough to hide a star that was invisible from Earth. And they had found it. That alone was information worth reporting.

What Will was really hoping for, was to discover planets in the system. Which was exactly what they had done.

Most astronomers had decided long ago there were no planets orbiting any of these stars, but in Earth’s solar system, there were enough small planets, there was always the possibility that there were some exoplanets here that had avoided detection. Now Will knew there were two of them orbiting the third star. And the first planet held life. Life that was much like prehistoric life on Earth. Mammals that resembled dinosaurs, which could somehow live in the planet’s atmosphere. Will had documented everything in the two weeks they were there, and knew he would have to return someday. But it wasn’t the planet. And they only had a few weeks, so they didn’t stay long.

But as soon as they had left that planet’s atmosphere, Will was looking out in space when Robot took them through the rift again, and as the celestial bodies began speeding toward them like reflectors on a highway late at night, he thought, there is just so much out here to see. What if I don’t go back?

The thought had shocked him. Not because of what it was, but the fact that it seemed to come from somewhere back in the recesses of his mind. Almost as if it had always been there, lying dormant. And he didn’t understand it at all. Because the thing was, he loved his family more than anything else in the world. And he couldn’t imagine life without them.

But when he had the thought, it didn’t seem unnatural at all. He imagined how explorers must have felt. Not the ones who were looking for fame and fortune; discovering continents and cultures the civilized world had not even known existed. Planting a flag, writing a book, giving speeches about everything they had found.

No. Not those explorers. But the ones who left with no intention of ever returning. Seeking something they didn’t even know was there. To those explorers, there was no comfort at all in family—in the familiar. The only comfort they found was in seeking. And there was a part of Will that was concerned the further he got from his family, the more comfortable he was away from them. And he didn’t ever want to feel that way.

And then they found this planet. In the solar system it was supposed to be in, according to the stories. And it could sustain human life. That was the important thing.

After learning of the robots and the alien culture that had designed them, it wouldn’t be the greatest scientific discovery maybe, but it could possibly be the greatest historical discovery for Earth. And that was something he would have to report. Not for the fame. He was way past that. He was no longer eleven, recording his discovery of the crashed alien spaceship. And he was already famous, at least on Alpha Centauri. Everyone knew him after the robot battle and what he had done to save the colony. And the one thing he had learned about fame, was that it wasn’t what it was cracked up to be. But the discovery would be so important, he couldn’t just disappear with Robot and never return. He would owe it to humanity to report everything he found.

But now, Will had the feeling his dream of dying and drifting comfortably away into whatever was next, was tied to this brain worm. The feeling that he had to go somewhere, and wherever it was, there was no coming back from it. And, that he was fine with it. He didn’t understand that. After everything they had been through, he should have been satisfied to be safely on Alpha Centauri, and lead a normal life, finally. The reason his mother had brought them all to space.

The problem was, he felt like something was missing.

They had finally made it to the colony, all of them changed by their experiences. Will more than any of them. And it wasn’t just that he had part of Robot inside him now, it was much more.

His dad seemed happy, finally able to slow down, and think about what life with the family might look like. He was even talking about farming. Though Will could never see that in his father. Judy was calmer than she had ever seemed, and was content working at the hospital, finding new friends, and living a normal life. And Penny was catching up in school, and spending more time writing than she ever had. And she had finally decided who she wanted to be with. Just before Will and Robot left, she confided in her brother that Liam didn’t take it very well when she told him there was a possibility she was actually in love with Vijay. Liam had sort of stormed out of the coffee shop they were sitting in when she broke the news to him.

Will didn’t tell Penny, but he wasn't surprised at Liam's reaction. There was something about the boy Will was never really sure about. He seemed like a nice enough kid, and he was definitely helpful in the year they were stranded together. Strong and athletic and willing to take a risk, pretty much the opposite of Vijay. But Will remembered one day when Robot was with Judy, and Will was in the engine room, going over the titanium numbers when Liam walked in. It was just the two of them there.

“So, you going to get us off this rock?” He had asked.

“That’s the plan,” Will answered.

“You know, it’s not bad here,” Liam said. “No parents telling us what to do. Complete freedom.”

“Just like Alexander Selkirk,” Will responded.

“Who?”

“Never mind, I’m just saying we can only be so free, considering we’re shipwrecked.”

“Yeah, it is what you make it,” Liam said. Then, “You know, if you weren’t always running around with that robot, maybe you could find a girlfriend, and you would be happier here too.”

Will had been concentrating on his numbers. They seemed off somehow, but now he looked up. “I’m not thinking about that, Liam. I’m thinking about how to get us all out of here.”

“Well, maybe you should. Quite a few of the girls like you. There’s that whole quiet, contemplative thing going on with you. And the robot adds a touch of danger. Girls love that. Penny does, that’s for sure.”

Now Will was getting angry. “I don’t really want you to talk to me about my sister, okay?”

“All I’m saying is, you have a lot going for you. You should take advantage of it.”

“Is that what you do?” Will said, “Take advantage?”

“Calm down, just two guys talking here. We’re on the same side you know.”

“We are on the same side, Liam. All of us. And we’re all trying to survive and make our way to Alpha Centauri. Are you trying to do the same thing as the rest of us?”

“Yeah. Of course. But I’m going to have as much fun as possible while I’m here. You should lighten up a little, and maybe you would too.”

They heard someone enter the room, and looked up to see Penny. “What are you two talking about?” She asked.

Liam put a hand on Will’s shoulder. “I’m just telling your little brother he’s too serious, and needs to lighten up and try to have a little fun.”

“He’s sort of right, Will,” Penny agreed. “You’re never in a good mood anymore.”

“I have a lot on my mind, Penny. Now I’m busy, so if you guys will let me get back to work…”

“Let’s go for a hike,” Liam said, taking Penny by the hand.

“Let’s,” she agreed, and the two walked toward the door. Just before they exited, Liam turned and winked at Will.

He watched them leave, then he hurried to catch up with them. “Hey, I want to go too,” he said.

“I thought you were busy,” Penny argued, clearly not wanting him to go with them.

“You want me to lighten up and have some fun, as long as I don’t tag along. I get it,” he said.

“Well, everyone needs some privacy on occasion,” Liam said.

“Privacy for what?” Will said.

“Hey, Will. What’s wrong?” Penny asked.

“Nothing. I’ve just got a lot on my mind.” He turned and stomped back inside the engine room. He was fuming. He needed to talk to his sister. He didn’t trust Liam, but Penny seemed so infatuated with the boy, he wasn’t sure she would listen to him anyway.

A few minutes later, he heard Penny say, “Will.”

He looked up to see she had come back by herself. “What’s wrong?” She asked.

“I don’t like him. I don’t trust him. And I’m worried about you.”

She smiled at him. “You don’t think I can take care of myself?”

“Yes, if you want to. Do you want to?”

She was still smiling. Finally she sat down. “Will, I’m really surprised that you’re concerned for me. I’ve never seen this protective brother side before. At least when it comes to guys. And I have to admit, I kinda like it. But I’m careful. We haven’t done very much. I’m not even sure I want to. But I like him. He’s a nice guy, and he’s…strong…not just physically, but mentally too.”

“And you’re attracted to that because Vijay is what…too nice?”

“No. Well. Maybe, I don’t know. How much experience have we had with kids our own age? I’m just figuring it out as I go along. But I’ll be careful. I promise.”

“You better get going, he’s waiting for you.” He didn’t even look at her when he said it.

“I told him I was going to stay and help you.”

Now he looked up. “Why?”

“Because I’m worried about you too, Will. And you’re more important than Liam or Vijay or anyone else to me. What’s going on with you? Talk to me.”

Will just looked back at her for a few seconds before answering. Finally he said, “It’s nothing Penny…maybe it’s everything.”

“Will, you know you’re not in this by yourself. It’s not all on your shoulders, even if you think it is.”

“I know Penny…but Judy has other responsibilities. I’m used to her being in charge when Mom and Dad aren’t around. I’m not used to being the one everyone is looking to for answers.”

“Well, let’s see. If it hadn’t been for you, Judy would have died in the ice…”

“If it hadn’t been for me, Judy would have never been in the ice.”

“Don’t interrupt me when I’m proving you wrong. It doesn’t happen that often. As I was saying…if it hadn’t been for youuuuu…we never would have figured out how to use giant, alien bat poop for fuel and get off that planet. If it hadn’t been for youuuuu…Mom and Judy and I would have died when the hatch wouldn’t shut. If it hadn’t been for youuuuu…Mom and I would have died in the lightning strike on the water planet instead of using the Chariot as a Faraday cage. If it hadn’t been for youuuuu…Scarecrow would have died and not been able to save us from the robots when they came after us on the transport Jupiter. If it hadn’t been for youuuuu…. See what I mean? We’ve kind of always looked to you for answers.”

“Have you ever thought if it hadn’t been for meeeeee, none of this would have happened?” He said with a scowl.

“Because you didn’t jump in the freezing water. I know. But…”

“Beyond the freezing water, Penny. Have you ever thought a lot of this is my fault?” It’s me they want. Me.

“No. Not one second, Will. None of it is your fault, and I don’t even know what the hell you’re talking about. Look…I know it’s a lot of pressure. I just want you to know that I’m here, and you’re not alone in this. Okay?”

He didn’t answer for a few seconds, then said, “thanks Penny. But if you really want to help, don’t make me worry about you too. You and that guy.”

“Liam.”

“Yeah, him.”

“You really don’t like him do you?”

“I really don’t like him.”

Then she stood up and walked toward him, put her arms around him and pulled him into a hug. “Don’t worry about me little brother. I can take care of myself.”

Later that night he was lying in bed when there was a knock on his cabin door. “Come in,” he said.

Judy walked in and smiled at him. “Can I talk to you, Will?” She asked.

“Of course.” They rarely spoke these days and he was glad to see her here, when it was just the two of them.

She sat down on his bed. “Penny came to see me. She’s worried about you. She thinks you have too much pressure on you. And she blames me.”

“She blames you for everything, I think,” Will answered.

“Yeah. She’s mad at me still. Maybe she always will be. For the idea to leave the adults.”

“Not if we ever see Mom and Dad again. She’ll get over it then,” Will said.

“You said if. I need you to be you, Will. Positive, hopeful, Will. We’ll see them again.”

“Do you know what too much pressure is, Judy?” He asked. “That. What you just did. You want me to be positive, hopeful Will. Eleven year old Will. Before I almost died in the fire. Before you almost died in the ice. Before we had to turn the Jupiter 2 into a sailboat. Before we got separated from Mom and Dad. Before the robots came looking for…”

He had stopped and Judy looked at him confused. “Before the robots came looking for the engine?” She said.

“Yeah…yes,” he said. “Before the robots came looking for the engine.”

“Are you sure that’s what you were going to say?” His sister asked. “Do you think they were looking for something else?”

“No. That’s what I was going to say. And the thing is, I can handle the pressure of trying to get the Jupiter engines operational. I can handle the pressure of everyone looking at me every time I walk out of the Jupiter, wondering if I’m going to tell them we’re ready to go. I can handle all the stuff that happened to us. But don’t make me try to be that eleven year old boy who was so excited about finding a new life on Alpha Centauri. That positive, hopeful boy. I’m not him anymore, Judy. I’m just not.”

Tears had come to his eyes, and his sister was startled. “I think…I think Penny was right, Will. This is too much pressure for you. I’ve kind of been letting you worry about this while I…”

“Took care of ninety seven kids? Like you don’t have any pressure on you? This is what it is Judy. This is where we are. It’s on us. Me and you. There’s nothing we can do about that until we get to Alpha Centauri. Then maybe we’ll have the chance to live normal lives for a change.”

She had leaned over and hugged him for a long time, then when she let him go she said, “We’ll do it, Will. We always do. We’ll do it together. Me and you and Penny.”

“About Penny,” Will said. “I’m worried about her. I don’t like Liam.”

“Why not? He’s been a big help. We need him.”

“I don’t trust him,” Will said. “Can you keep an eye on Penny? I’m going to try, too.”

“I’ll try Will, but I really don’t think there’s anything to worry about. Liam’s a little cocky, but I think his heart’s in the right place. But I’ll watch her, and I’ll talk to her about him, okay?”

Will remembered when Judy had left the room he laid there for a long time, trying to get to sleep. Of course he had been going to say something else. He had been going to say before the robots came looking for him. And he knew that was his cross to bear alone. No matter what Penny said about being there for him. He knew the robots had come for him, even if no one else did. And he knew he was going to have to face that some day.

But it was all in the past now. They had made it to Alpha Centauri, and everyone had moved on. Everyone except him. He hadn’t been there for a month before he realized he wasn’t happy. It was like, everything they had done to get there had just been so much, why wouldn’t they want to rest? Why wouldn’t his father want to stay home for a change? Find something else to do? Why wouldn’t he be satisfied with going to school, and leading a normal life?

Because something in this whole story was missing. And he had to find out what it was.

Chapter Text

The hills were red. Blood red. Beautiful and yet unsettling at the same time. Will glanced up at Robot, standing beside him, as they overlooked a valley and the strange hills in the distance. “We have to check it out,” Will said.

Robot didn’t say a word. He didn’t have to. Will again found that he knew what his friend was thinking without completely connecting to him. He wasn’t sure why. Maybe it was because they had been friends now for over three years. Even when they had been separated, they each knew the other was out there. Searching.

Or maybe it was because they were connected now in a way they had never been before. Robot was part of the boy. Yes, he had saved Will’s life by implanting part of himself in the boy’s heart. But it was beyond that. Before, they could feel each other, sometimes reading each other’s mind, but often not. And Will would become frustrated, not really understanding why that feeling would come and go. Why sometimes he knew exactly what Robot was thinking, and other times, not. But then Robot became more. He didn’t take orders from Will; he chose to be with him. To protect him. To be his friend.

Will had thought about that a lot, and when it happened. It was when SAR had hurt him on the Jupiter 2, after he and Robot had come back to get the engine. Though, even that far back, it was possible the engine wasn’t the only thing they had come back for. Will didn’t understand what was happening then. He just thought they were attacking the ship, and everyone on board. And he was so frightened. But when he saw his sisters climb inside the Chariot, he knew they were trapped, and he knew his mother was outside. If he had jumped in the Chariot with them, the three of them would be able to do nothing but watch their mother die. And they would probably die too.

And so he had only one choice. Try to talk to Robot. Try to convince him they were friends. Try to help him remember what they had been together. But when he approached Robot and tried to speak to him, and Robot raised his fist to strike, Will knew he was going to die. It was the scariest moment of his short life.

In the tree, he had been scared of course. But he had time. Time to think about his family. Time to think about what had brought him to that moment. And he had resigned himself to his fate.

And at the end, in the tree, he didn’t remember feeling afraid. He just remembered the great sadness that had come over him. He had looked all around; at the smoldering forest, at the embers, at the fire getting closer and closer. He looked up into the sky, sighed as tears came to his eyes. Not because he was about to die. But because he was about to die alone, without his family. And he did die. In his mind. And he remembered that he was okay with it. He had thought of that often, since. Why was he so frightened of everything, but then, once he accepted the inevitable, all the fear had left him? Like in his dream of jumping in the cold water.

Of course it hadn’t ended that way in the tree. But on the Jupiter 2, when Robot raised his fist, he had no time to prepare, and he felt overpowering fear before his mother hit Robot with the rotary wench. But then, SAR stood over him, the three prongs on each hand turning as red as his angry face shield, and Will knew he was going to die.

And that’s when it happened. Robot changed. Will didn’t break his programming. At least if he had, he didn’t know how he had done it. But Will thought Robot did it himself. Because—somehow—in that split second, Robot remembered who Will was and who they were together. And then Will was no longer his master, he was his friend. And they had been friends ever since.

For a long time, Will believed when SAR saw this happen, he didn’t understand. And from that moment on, he had to find Will. He had to understand what happened to free Robot from his programming. And he had to destroy the boy.

But after SAR stabbed Will, when he was lying in the hospital recovering from heart surgery before the robot battle, he had a few long hours to think about it. He was no longer sure killing him was the whole story. It was what SAR had said when he pushed the cold, steel blade in his heart, “Now you are free.” Try as he might, Will never fully could figure out what that meant.

Yes. It seemed obvious. SAR had been programmed, he somehow broke his programming, and now he hated anything that looked or acted or felt like a master. But somehow, Will thought there was more to it than that. If he hated Will, hated all humans, why would he care if Will was free or not?

If SAR was human, Will could understand the whole thing. It could be some philosophical message you pass on to your enemy when you are about to take his life: Your heart is your master. So now, you have no master. You are free. Just as I am.

But SAR was not human. He was a computer. Programmed to perform tasks. And however the robot had broken his programming, it still seemed like there was more to his message as he killed Will’s heart. And Will just couldn’t forget about it. Couldn’t let it go. And so he was here, trying to find out whatever he could about the alien culture that had created the robots, and about the message that SAR was delivering when he stabbed him.

What he had told his parents to be allowed to go to space was partially true. They were exploring the galaxy and they wouldn’t leave the galaxy. But he left out the most important part: Will thought there was a possibility the secret to the robots and the aliens might actually be found a lot closer to Earth than anyone realized.

He thought Penny might have some suspicion that he was not just going back to space to explore. They had become so close when they were stranded, even though she was busy with the boys most of the time, and it seemed as if she was beginning to read him almost as well as Robot could.

The evening before he left Alpha Centauri, the family had gathered in the dining room and played cards. As the game ended and they were telling each other goodnight, Penny lingered behind, remaining at the table by herself. As they all headed off to their rooms, Will glanced behind him and saw her still sitting there. She was just watching him. He walked back to the table and sat down across from her. “You okay?” He asked.

“Are you?” She answered.

“Yeah. I’m great, Pen. I’m excited.”

“Why are you doing this, Will?” She asked.

“Like I said, just to see what’s out there.”

“The last three years wasn’t enough for you?”

“I thought it would be. But I don’t know. I guess not.”

“And there isn’t some other reason?” She asked.

“No, there isn’t,” he lied.

She just stared back at him. Finally she said, “I wish you were still my baby brother.”

“Penny, don’t say that. That makes me feel bad. I’ll always be your baby brother.”

“No you won’t. You’re my little brother. But you haven’t been my baby brother for a long time. And I know exactly when that was.”

“When?”

“When we got back to the Resolute after being stranded on the Water Planet. And we were in the cafeteria and Scarecrow was after us. We hid behind the table, and we were both so scared, but I wanted to protect you.”

“You hugged me and put your hand over my mouth to make sure I stayed quiet. I remember.” He smiled. “You did protect me, Penny.”

“Everything changed after that, Will. You went down to the Amber Planet to find Robot, then went back to save Scarecrow. And when the Jupiter 2 was the last ship to come back when the robots attacked, I was so afraid you wouldn’t be on it. I remember waiting and watching all the people come off, just thinking you wouldn’t be there, and I would never see you again. And then you were.”

“Yeah,” he said.

“But things were different. It was like, you just suddenly grew up. And you kept doing things on your own. It had never been that way before. It had always been the two of us. Back home, when everyone was busy, and we used to hang out at the park.”

“Yeah, we did everything together, but you were still my big sister, and you always took care of me.”

“But I can’t anymore, Will. And I miss it. I miss it so much.”

She looked like she was about to cry. He stood up and walked to her side of the table, sat in a chair next to her, and they hugged for a long time without saying a word.

Finally, she said, “Promise me you’ll come back, Will.”

“I promise, Penny. I’ll come back.”

Now, as he stood looking out at the valley and the hills beyond, he felt guilty that he had lied to her. He had to go back. He looked up at Robot. And he knew what he was thinking.

“I know, Robot. Family. Christmas Eve is in four days. They’re probably worried about us already, but I said before Christmas. They would be surprised if we went back much earlier than that. They know us. But I promised Penny I would go back home, and I’m not going to let her down. Okay?”

Will looked back across the valley to the red hills. “We’ll go out there and check it out, come back, then head home. And if we see anything interesting on the way, we’ll know we have to come back here. We can be out there and back in three days, I think, then straight home. We’ll be there by Christmas Eve, eve. I promise.”

Robot kept looking at him.

“Please?” Will said.

Then he felt him. The boy smiled. “Thanks Robot. I’ll get the Chariot.”

Thirty minutes later, they were driving across the hard packed surface, on their way toward the red hills in the distance.

They had spotted them at the end of the first day, after hiking to the top of a low mountain to get a look around. They had hiked back to the Jupiter 2 and tried to fly closer before landing, but when they had decreased altitude enough to get a visual and a reading of the surface here, they realized there was no place to land that would be safe for the Jupiter 2.

For a kilometer or so, it was hard packed soil, and then a forest. At the far side of the forest was a canyon that seemed to cut through the planet for many kilometers, and on the other side was a swamp, where a river flowed out of the highlands, to the canyon. Beyond the swamp were the strange red hills. So they had landed the Jupiter high above this valley where they had a visual of everything around them. Now they planned to take the Chariot as far as they could into the valley and through the forest, before hiking through the canyon and swamp to the other side where the red hills were.

Will looked in the rearview mirror and saw Robot’s big blue chest as he clung to the back of the Chariot. He remembered the first time his friend had ridden on the vehicle this way, when Penny had rescued him and his parents from the storm. Almost four years ago, Will thought. So much had happened to them, and it was normal that the family was settling in on Alpha Centauri, building new lives. He was happy for them.

But as for Will, there was more to him wanting to return to space than the robots and the aliens who had created them. He couldn’t imagine just getting up and going to school every day and preparing for a career doing…what?  Geology? Knowing something about rocks was a lot different than making a living studying them. Teaching? He had no desire to do that. He could see himself being a scientist and working for Alpha, and he knew his mother held out hope for that, and he used to think that was what he wanted. But he had begun to think the structure of it all might not be for him. Maybe there was a little Don West in him.

Thinking of Don made him look down at the console and find the man’s play list. He scrolled, looking for something. Then…perfect. He pressed play and cranked the music as loud as it would go. He listened as the beating of drums started, then a sound that reminded him of a jungle. He began to sing along with the lyrics:

“…and I was around when Jesus Christ, had his moment of doubt and pain, made damn sure that Pilate, washed his hands and sealed his fate.”

Then he sang at the top of his lungs, “Pleased to meet you, hope you guess my name, but what’s puzzling you, is…the nature of my game…”

Will glanced back at Robot where he clung to the back of the Chariot, and smiled as they bounced across the surface of this newly discovered mystery planet, while the music blared.

“This!” Will said aloud. “This is exactly what I want to do. This. Forever.”

Chapter Text

Don hurried into Maureen’s office. “I can’t!” He said. “I just can’t!”

“Can’t what?”

“Manage robots. They have minds of their own.”

“They don’t have minds at all,” she replied.

“Well they have computer brains or whatever. But no matter what I try to tell them, they think they understand our design better than we do.”

“Maybe they do,” she replied, smiling. “Has there been one instance when any changes they made did anything other than improve the design or structural integrity?”

“No but…”

“Then why do you have a problem with them?”

“I don’t have a problem with them. But you all think the same way. Everything by the book. Always. And they change the book, but they still seem to have a book…ur…something in their minds. Their robot minds. But it isn’t always by the book. You have to account for the fact humans don’t always do things by the book…”

“I know, Don. That’s the problem. It’s the same thing Judy tried to tell Grant. The ships are designed with complex computers. All of them. Jupiters, the Resolute. Everything now. They are always correcting for human error.”

“But we design the computers! These are not humans and every time they make a change in the design, how do we know we won’t have a problem when a human mind does have to take over?”

Maureen sighed. “Can we not do this again, Don?” It was a never ending debate, and she normally enjoyed it. But not today.

He could see something was bothering her. “What’s going on?” He asked.

“Nothing.”

“Will’s not back.”

“Yeah,” she said. “Will’s not back.”

“Look Maureen, he said before Christmas.”

“And it’s almost Christmas.”

“Almost,” Don said.

“I know. I know. That’s what Judy and John say. And of course, Will being Will, is not going to come back any sooner than he has to, it’s just…”

“You’re worried about him.”

“Yes. I just can’t help but think it was a bad idea. Letting him go. With everything that happened. His heart.”

“But Judy said his heart is perfect now. Maybe stronger than it was before.”

“Suddenly you’re okay with that robot technology.”

Now Don realized she was really concerned. “Look, Maureen, I’m sure he’s fine. And Robot’s with him. You know he won’t let anything happen to him.”

“I know.” She smiled. “But I’m a mother. It’s my job to worry. Anyway, you’re coming over for Christmas?”

“Of course.”

“Good. Alright, let’s go take a look at the design alterations you’re concerned with.”

“Actually, I’m leaving early,” he said.

“Okay, everything alright?” As much as Don enjoyed life, Maureen had been surprised to find that his work ethic was so strong. He was almost always one of the last people who left the Space Station to head back to the surface.

“Yeah. Just fine.”

Maureen noticed something in his voice. “Hey…you have a date, don’t you?”

“Um…maybe.”

“So, anyone I know?” Maureen asked.

“No. Not really.”

“Well is it serious?” She asked.

“I don’t think so. I guess I don’t really know.”

“So, you just met her?”

“I’ve known her…um yeah. I haven’t known her long.”

“Well, bring her over for Christmas dinner,” Maureen said.

“She’ll…she’ll probably have plans.”

“Well, okay. If her plans change the invitation is open. We would love to meet her.”

“Thanks, Maureen,” Don said. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He walked to the elevator, pressed the button to go down to the shuttle to take him back to the planet, thinking how close he had come to saying “She’ll be there for Christmas dinner, don’t worry.”

“I went out a searching, for a friend of mine, hadn’t seen Eddie in a long time,” John sung in a low voice to himself as he stared out across the stalks of corn, rustling in the warm breeze. It had been two months since they had arrived, finally, on Alpha Centauri, and while he spent much of his time helping rebuild the infrastructure that was destroyed by the robots, when he wasn’t in town he was out here.

All the colonists who chose to be farmers were allotted fifty acres, and crops were rotated annually. Mainly corn and wheat and soy beans. But there was some experimental farming plots as well, and they figured in a couple more seasons, they would have a wide variety of crops to feed the colonists.

John had inherited this plot from someone who had died in the robot battle. The man had no children, and his wife had grown up on a farm in Ohio, and hated it. So John had volunteered to farm his acres. It was really homesteading. If he farmed the property for five years, and made improvements to the land, it would be his, if he wanted to keep it. Maureen wanted no part of it. Her mother had been pretty demanding, and she had few fond memories of growing up on a farm.

John looked out across the field. At the far end there were some woods, with a creek running through them, and the land began to rise into gentle hills. Beyond that, the mountain range. The crops were almost mature, and there wasn’t much to do until it was time to harvest, which would be around March in this climate. But he would come out here when he wasn’t working in town, to just be here. By himself. It was so peaceful. He had joined the military right out of high school. Actually, his father had strongly suggested it. He had had a few run in’s with the law. Nothing serious. Mainly fighting. But his father had explained that he was headed for trouble and his mother wouldn’t understand. So he joined the Navy, and that’s where he stayed.

But now, all that was behind him. No more fighting. No more crash landings. No more giant alien lizards. No more robot battles. No more near death experiences every time he turned around. Now he could do whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted. He could come out here and just be here. On his own land. Where the sun was bright, the breeze was warm, and the fields were full. As he stood looking out across the land—his land—he had one thought: I’m so fucking bored.

Maureen was standing in the kitchen, looking out the window into their front yard thinking about her conversation with Don. Then she was thinking of something that happened to Will when he was seven years old. She had knocked on his door to tell him dinner was ready, and when he answered that he would be right down, she could tell something was wrong by the sound of his voice.

“Will, can I come in?” she called.

He didn’t answer immediately, but after a while he said, “Yes,” and she opened the door and walked in. She could tell he had been crying, but he was trying to hide it. He was sitting at his desk next to his bed.

She walked over and sat on the bed beside him. “Will, is something wrong?” She asked.

“No…I don’t know. I was reading something.”

“What were you reading that upset you so much?”

“Just a history thing on line. In school we’re studying about the early settlers in New England, and it made me want to look some things up, and I did.”

“So, what was it?”

“Did you ever hear of the Pequot war?”

“I think so. History wasn’t really my thing though…science you know.”

“Yeah, I know. But the English settlers were at war with this Native American tribe called the Pequots and this one time they surrounded a village and burned it. And most of the warriors were not even there. It was just old people and women and children and they just…burned it down and killed almost every one of them. Like seven hundred people.”

“That’s horrible, Will.”

“And the English settlers had some Native American scouts from another tribe with them, and this article said a lot of them just disappeared into the woods, because they had never seen anyone who would just murder so many innocent people for like, no reason but to get their land or whatever. The scouts were enemies of the Pequots, but they would never have done that, and they didn’t want to fight with the settlers anymore. But why Mom? They were supposed to be more civilized. Why would they do that?”

Maureen remembered that she really had no answer for him, except there were bad people everywhere. She had hugged him until she could tell he was more relaxed, then they went downstairs together.

The memory made her smile. Will had always had such a soft heart, even as a small child. Then she was thinking of him and the fact he wasn’t back yet. “Where are you Will?” She whispered.

She saw John pull up in the Chariot. She watched him climb out, pause and look at the house, then walk up to the porch. She smiled. Finally he was home every day. Finally they were a family. Except Will wasn’t here. She sighed.

“My body’s kinda a weak boy, but my mind is still strong,” John sang, as he walked through the door.

“In the kitchen,” Maureen called, wondering what the hell he was singing, but afraid to ask, as he would probably raise his voice and keep going. John had impressed her in many ways when they first started dating, but he was one of the worst singers she had ever heard, not to mention his choice in music left a lot to be desired. It wasn’t that she didn’t like the type of music he listened to, but he had this weird habit of finding the most obscure songs. Even if they were from famous singers. So between that and his inability to hit a single note, no one ever knew what he was singing. The kids laughed about it, which just made him sing louder.

He walked in, humming the song now. He hugged her, kissed her, said, “how was work?”

“Good. Busy. Don’s concerned the robots have been making design changes.”

“Have they?”

“Yes. But so far, they’ve always been right. Their technology, John, it’s just incredible. Every day working with them I’m just more impressed. They made a design change on the fuel injectors, and I think we can bypass the entire oxidizer. Can you imagine? Those eels would not have been able to get inside the fuel lines. These robots could help us make advancements in the design that would take us twenty years without them.”

“But, what if Don’s right?” He had taken two glasses down, walked to the fridge, added two ice cubes in each, topped them with bourbon, and the two of them walked out to the front yard, where there were several chairs arranged beneath a grove of trees.

This had become their routine, once they were both home in the evening. They would catch up on their day, talk about how the rebuilding was going in town, and how the Resolute 2 was coming along. Eventually the conversation would turn to the kids.

“Well, the problem Don really has is that he’s afraid the robots are making changes based on the way they think, not the way humans think,” she said. “So if there’s a problem with the computers, will we be able to override the system if it’s based on their way of looking at things?”

“It sounds like a reasonable concern,” John said, and sipped his drink.

“Yeah. I guess. But it made me start thinking of something. I remembered Will being upset when he read something on line when he was seven. About the Pequot war with the early English Settlers of New England. He was upset when he found they burned a village full of women and children, and killed hundreds of people.”

“Jesus,” John said. “Humans being humans. And why would what Don said make you think of that?”

“Because of what you just said. Humans being humans. You know there are almost no animal species that practice genocide? Except for primates. They are about the only animal other than humans that will wipe out entire populations of other animals. There have been documented cases of bands of chimpanzees that annihilated rival bands, and killed every chimp in it. Our genetic code is ninety eight percent identical to chimpanzees. Our ancestors. It’s like we both have a genetic capacity for genocide. And as we advanced, we became better and better at it.”

“I’m still not sure what you’re getting at,” John said.

“I’m getting at the robots. These aliens apparently programmed the robots to destroy humans. One of them went to Earth, presumably to do that after scanning Grant. And they tried to destroy us. And in the end, they used their programming to destroy their masters.”

“And…?”

“The only other species we have ever seen that has done something like that is human beings and our genetic ancestors.”

“But they were much more advanced than us,” John said. “And as you said, we got much better at genocide once we were advanced and had advanced technology. Technology that could cause the extermination of entire populations.”

“And that’s exactly the problem,” She answered. “We split the atom over a hundred years ago. The first thing we used the technology for was to invent weapons and kill hundreds of thousands of people. We never conquered space the way the robots did.”

“Well, they did both. The engine was not only a way to rip a hole in the fabric of space, it was also a weapon of mass destruction.”

“Exactly, John. And they apparently were going to Earth to destroy the planet and kill everything on it. Up until Robot connected with Will, their programming seemed to have one purpose. Kill humans.”

“I’m not sure what you’re getting at.”

“It was a very human trait, John. Mass extermination of a species that is not like you. Why? That’s what’s bothering me. Why? Who were these aliens that were advanced enough to build a weapon like the robots and the engines, then turn them loose to exterminate humans.”

“Maybe they were going to exterminate everything,” John said.

“That would be counter productive. Destroy every living thing?”

“They were robots.”

“No, I mean their creators. They were organic beings, according to Will. Destroying every other organic being would only lead to their extinction. They were obviously advanced enough to know that. Besides, Will said before Robot connected to him, when they were in the tree, a butterfly or something that passed for one on that planet landed on him, and Robot just seemed…amazed by it. No. I think it was humans they wanted to destroy. And I can’t figure out why. Would they have come across other humans in their past? Is there other human life out there somewhere?”

“Well, I guess that’s something we’ll never know,” John answered. “Why is it so important to you?”

“You don’t want to know, John? Who these aliens were? How they became advanced enough to create the rift, and yet, why they wanted to destroy human life?”

“I guess I’m ready to not think about anything that involves life and death for awhile.”

“Come on, John. You’re not a farmer. You are never going to be a farmer. You hate being a farmer.”

He smiled. “I didn’t think you noticed.”

“Well, you certainly tried to hide it from me. But you’re miserable.”

“It just takes some getting used to. I like being home. Home with the kids.”

“Two of the kids,” she said.

“That’s what this is about, isn’t it? You’re worried about Will out there. And you’re thinking space is still a dangerous place. That there might be something out there still that would want to harm him.”

“Yes. I think it’s that. My mind’s just working overtime.”

“Robot’s with him. He still has a few days to get back. They’ll be here. Besides, as far as we can tell, these aliens that created the robots are extinct.”

“Yes. But if those aliens did discover other human life, and if those other humans hurt them in some way that would make them mortal enemies, to the point they would want to annihilate every human in the universe…what if that human life still exists? And what would that human life be like?”

John looked out over the lawn into the woods across the street. It was peaceful here, he thought. So why was he so damn restless? “Judy here for dinner tonight?” He asked.

“No, she was going out with friends. And Penny was going out with Vijay. They were going to see a movie, but she said she’d be home early. She has a final on Monday so doesn’t want to get home too late.”

John sighed.

“What?” Maureen asked.

“After three years, life is finally getting back to normal.”

“And…?”

“Life is getting back to normal. Kids doing their own thing, hanging out with their people. After three years of us being together almost every day…”

“Well, two years, and a year apart,” She said.

“Yeah, maybe it’s that year apart that bothers me so much. I feel like we have lost time to make up for, but everyone’s gone.”

“Which is the way it should be at their age,” Maureen said. “Friends. Boyfriends. They have their own lives, John. That’s why we came here. For them. For their future. This is normal.”

“Yeah. Except for our son, who’s off exploring the galaxy with his robot. Nothing normal about that.”

“Well, nothing really normal about Will at all,” Maureen said.

“Yeah. Remember when he was scared of everything? I remember when he fell down that crevasse, and he was talking to me on the radio, and all he wanted to know was how long it was going to take for me to get to him. Telling him I didn’t have time because Judy had to be the first priority was the hardest thing I’d ever done. Up to that point.”

They both knew he was thinking about carrying Will in his arms after SAR had stabbed him in the heart, both of them almost certain he was going to die. That was the hardest thing John had ever done.

Maureen tried to quickly push that memory away. “He had to be so frightened,” Maureen agreed. “When he realized he was going to be all alone for awhile.”

“Yeah, but you know what he said? He said, ‘go save her. You have to.’ Even then, when he was so scared, he was willing to give himself up to help his sister. I guess I should have known then what he was made of.”

Maureen was quiet for a minute, then said, “It had to be so horrible for him the year they were gone. He knew what he was going to do. So he was doing everything he could to get them off that planet, to get the kids here to Alpha Centauri, while the whole time he knew once he was here he would leave to find SAR. I can’t even imagine.”

“Yeah,” John said. He looked at his wife. She looked like she was about to burst into tears.

“Hey, let’s get the hell out of here. Go to town, eat dinner there. That Italian Restaurant is open again. I noticed when I was driving home.”

“That sounds great. I’ll message Penny in case she gets home before we do.”

John stood and offered his wife his hand and pulled her to her feet. He began walking toward the house, singing, “I’m staying close to the rock and the roll, sometimes I still feel it, down in my soul…”

But Maureen wasn’t listening. She stood there for a second, looking up at the sky. “Where are you, Will?” She said under her breath, then turned and followed her husband toward the house.

Chapter Text

Don arrived at the restaurant first. It was a quiet little place out of the way down a side street. It had been closed since the attack by the robots, but he had noticed it open a couple days before. It was early, and he was pretty sure they wouldn’t run into anyone they knew, especially at this hour. It was too early for dinner for most people, but he had his reasons for the quiet place and for meeting her at a time when few people would be here.

There was a small bar, and he sat down and ordered a Scotch and water. There was a mirror behind the bar, and he looked at himself after the bartender left the drink. He wasn’t that old he thought. There were some lines on his face, but what the hell, after the last three years, why wouldn’t there be? They all had scars they would bear. On the outside and the inside. And they all looked older. All of them except Judy he thought. She didn’t look much older than she did when they first met.

He thought of that day now. She had jumped out of the Chariot, hurrying up to the Watanabe’s Jupiter, her bag in her hand. He had walked out and asked which one the doctor was, and she said it was her. He couldn’t believe it. And later she broke his nose when she thought he was someone sneaking up on her. He smiled. Then he thought of what had happened in the last week.

He had gone out with a few of the engineers who were working on the Resolute 2. There were a couple of clubs that had been left undamaged in the robot battle, and they had gone to one of them. It was pretty crowded. There wasn’t much open and everyone wanted to get their lives back to normal as soon as possible, so they started doing normal things. Like going to clubs.

They were sitting at a round high top table. Don, and three engineers. One was a beautiful blond girl, Jasmine Rogers. Everyone liked her, but she seemed to have a thing for Don. He wasn’t sure what he thought of her yet. She was pretty much by the book and he was pretty much not.

They had been there for about thirty minutes. Don got up to go to the bathroom, and someone bumped into him. “Well, is it a thing?” A girl asked.

He turned to see who it was, and Judy was smiling at him. “Captain Doctor Robinson!” He said and quickly hugged her. He hadn’t seen her since Thanksgiving dinner.

“How are you, Don? Mom said you’re like a workaholic suddenly.”

“Your mother is going to destroy my reputation.”

“Well I can see it’s not all work,” Judy said, glancing over at the table Don had been seated at. “She’s cute.”

Don looked over at Jasmine, who was talking to the others at the table. “Yeah, she’s cute, but I just work with her. Not my type. Too rigid in her thinking. Engineers you know. Always by the book.”

“Hey, is that a dig at me?” Judy said with a fake pout.

“A Robinson by the book? No way. You guys write your own book. And you don’t even follow that.”

Judy laughed, then said, “Well, I better get back to my friends.” She nodded over to the table she had been sitting at. Then she lowered her voice and whispered, “anesthesiologists. They’re boring.”

Don laughed and hugged her again, and they went their separate ways. Don had sat back down at the table, but the rest of the night he caught himself glancing toward Judy. She danced with a couple of guys who came up to her, and one of the guys at the table she was with a few times. Don had started to wonder if she thought that particular guy was a little less boring to Judy than she had indicated. But every once in a while he caught her looking over at him, then quickly averted her eyes when Don looked in her direction. But one time she didn’t avert her look. Instead she smiled. Don smiled back, then turned back to his table.

A few minutes later, he felt someone come up behind him. “Admiral West, would you care to dance?” Everyone at the table laughed.

Don turned to Judy who was standing behind him, smiling. “What?” She said to everyone with an innocent look.

“Admiral?” One of the men at the table said.

“He’s not an Admiral?” She asked, and sounded shocked and turned to Don. “You lied?” She acted offended.

Now all the others at the table were laughing at him. “Admiral West. That’s gonna stick,” one of the men said.

“Thanks Judy, thanks a lot,” Don said, smiling at her.

“Well, you’re the one who lied, the least you could do is dance with me and make up for it.” Then she whispered, “I have to get away from that guy at our table. He won’t stop talking about himself.”

“Well, good thing I never do that,” Don said as he took her hand and led her to the dance floor.

“Yeah, but you know you’re full of shit,” Judy said. “He really believes he’s God’s gift to women. Even if you did tell my dad and mom you were Admiral West.”

“Yeah, and thanks for that, it will stick you know.”

“That was the plan.”

In the end they danced several times and ended up going to the bar and spending most of the night talking. The next day Judy had messaged him and asked him to meet her for lunch. Everything was natural and they spent most of the time talking about what they had experienced together. Then yesterday she messaged him again and asked when he was going to ask her out to dinner. And now he was waiting for her, wondering just what the hell he was doing.

Then she walked in. Just as beautiful as always, though it was obvious she was dressed for a date. Don, not sure what was going on between them, had dressed up, but not as much as she had. She was wearing a low cut black skirt, maybe the first time he had seen her in a skirt, her hair was flowing down her back, her makeup was perfect, and she was smiling. He was trying not to look at her athletic legs as she walked across the room toward him.

Don stood and greeted her with a hug, and said, “What are you drinking?”

“You think they have a Chardonnay?” She asked.

“Sure do.” He turned to the bartender, who had overheard and nodded and walked away to get the drink.

“How did you know that?” She asked. “I don’t think you’re a wine drinker. Or am I not the first girl you brought here?” She said with a grin.

“Let’s just say, I used to know their supplier.”

“Oh, one of your customers,” Judy said. “That’s how you knew about this little hidden place.”

The bartender brought Judy’s drink back and said, “If you two are staying for dinner, take any table you like, it won’t get busy for another hour or so.”

They thanked him and Don led Judy to a table in the back. He pulled her chair out for her, and she said, “Wow, a gentleman too.”

Don sat down and Judy just looked at him with a smile. He was unsure of what to say for the first time maybe in his life. So she said, “Well, you didn’t respond when I said you were taking me to a place hidden away from everything. And it’s pretty early to eat. I think you are afraid someone is going to see us.”

Finally Don said, “About that, Judy. I like you. I always have. I just don’t know what we’re doing.”

“We’re having dinner aren’t we?”

“Yes, um…is that all we’re doing?”

“If you want to say something Admiral West, why don’t you say it?” She was still smiling at him.

“Judy, is this a date, date?”

“I guess it’s whatever we want it to be.”

“Well now that’s where I have a problem. I’m not sure it’s whatever we want it to be. Let’s just say, hypothetically, it was a real date, date. I think there might be some people who would have a problem with that. Let’s start with your father, John Robinson.”

“Why would he have a problem with that?” She asked, still acting innocent, though they both knew she was teasing him.

“Well, for one, I’m old enough to be your older brother.”

“You’re ten years older than me, that’s not unheard of.”

“And for another thing, we’ve been practically brother and sister for the last three years. We’ve lived together a big part of that time.”

“Did you see me as your sister, Don?”

“No. I saw Will and Penny as younger siblings. I still do. But I guess I never saw you that way.”

“How did you see me?”

“As a friend. A good friend.”

“And that’s the only way you’ve ever thought of me?”

“I plead the fifth,” He said. Then looked around. “No one’s here so where’s the waiter. I think I’m gonna need another drink.”

Then Judy hit him on the arm. “I’m just fucking with you, Don.” She laughed. “And you were so uncomfortable.”

“Whew,” he said. “Don’t do that to me.”

“Well, the problem is, you just pleaded the fifth when I asked if you ever thought of me in another way. So that’s not going to go away very quickly.”

“Okay, where’s the waiter,” He said, looking around.

She just smiled at his discomfort.

They took their time eating, and the conversation turned back to their time lost in space.

“Do you ever miss it, Don?” Judy asked.

“Which part? Crashing? Floating through space with your dad? Getting knocked out by a robot?”

“Yes,” she said.

“Yes!” He admitted.

She laughed. “Thank God, Don. I thought I was weird! It’s only been two months since the war with the robots, and things have sort of settled in to…”

“Normal,” he finished.

“Yeah, that. I mean, everything was just…dangerous, but I felt so…”

When she didn’t finish the sentence, he said, “Alive?”

“Yes! Alive. I wanted to be a doctor for as long as I can remember. And now I’m a doctor. At the only hospital on the planet. But compared to being a doctor on an alien planet where it was all on me, and compared to the year I spent making sure ninety seven kids survived, it’s almost like I’m just going through the motions and…”

“Waiting?”

“Yes! How come you keep finishing my sentences?” She laughed again.

“Maybe because they’re my thoughts too,” he said.

“Really? I thought you were so happy to get here, and leave all that behind you.”

“I thought so too. And I’m doing the most important work in my life, helping your mother and Alpha build another Resolute. It’s just not the same as living on the edge of life and death all the time. And you know me. I’m a fan of living. Maybe its number one fan. But it seems like something is missing.”

“Yeah,” she agreed. “And to tell you the truth, I miss the family. I mean all of us together all the time. I was so happy to get off the Water Planet. See people besides just us. But now I’m surrounded by people at work, friends…”

“Boys,” Don said.

“Boys is right. Most of them don’t act like men, that’s for sure. But, now I just miss us all being together.”

“Even Doctor Smith?” Don asked, with a grin.

“I miss most of us being together,” she said with a smile.

“But now, it’s like back on Earth. All of us living separate lives, then just sleeping under the same roof. It’s just not the same. And Will is gone. I didn’t know I would miss him as much as I do. We didn’t have a lot of time together when we were stranded with the kids. We were both so busy with our responsibilities. Me taking care of everyone, and Will trying to get us off the planet. But now I really miss him. We were so close his whole life. I felt responsible for him. And now I don’t even know where he is.”

“Well, he should be home in the next couple days,” Don said.

“I hope so. I think Mom’s starting to get worried.”

“Yeah,” Don agreed. “I asked her because I thought the same thing. She admitted she was. That’s really why you wanted to see me, isn’t it? You missed the way things were?”

She smiled. “Well, I did miss you Don. But yeah, when I saw you in the club, it really hit me how much I miss things the way they were. I never see you. Or anyone really. You know we were all sort of an extended family. Everyone in the 24th Colonist group. And it’s like, there’s some force higher than us that just decides one day, it’s all over. And we have to live with that.”

“Well that’s how life works, isn’t it?” Don said. “We move on.”

“Yeah, I guess I’m just not ready,” she said. Now she sounded sad.

“Well, we’re still family, Judy. Like you said. None of us have to move on from that.”

“I know.” But she didn’t sound any happier about it.

When they finished dinner he walked her to her Chariot.

“Thanks for seeing me Don,” She said. “I hope I didn’t make you too uncomfortable,” she smiled.

“Maybe a little at first,” he said, smiling back.

They hugged. “I still want to hear about this other way you thought of me sometime,” she grinned at him.

“I must have had too much to drink, I don’t recall saying anything like that.” He smiled at her and opened her door. She kissed him on the cheek and got in the Chariot while he stood beside the open window.

“You’ll be there for Christmas, right?” She asked.

“Of course,” he said. “We’re family.”

She started the Chariot, then Don got a call on his radio, “Do you know where I can find a good mechanic?”

He looked at Judy.

“Penny?” Judy asked.

Chapter Text

Penny and Vijay were hiking along the river below the dam. Since Penny had finally made her choice to be with Vijay, they spent as much time as they could together. He was walking ahead of her on a narrow path. He liked to try and take care of her, and she thought much of it was because he was still insecure about Liam. She really didn’t feel like she needed taken care of, and was pretty sure if they got into any trouble, she would be just as valuable to him as he was to her. But she let him try and prove himself. He really was the nicest boy she had ever met, and had the kindest heart. Well, except for her brother. But her brother was a different kind of boy. Different than anyone.

“Well?”

When she heard Vijay ask the question, she realized he had said something to her and she was completely spaced out. “I’m sorry Vijay, what did you ask me?”

“If you wanted to hike up to the top of the dam? We could take the elevator, it’s a long hike, but sunset isn’t for a couple more hours, so we have time.”

“Yes. Let’s hike up and watch the sunset from there.”

“Okay.” He stopped and turned to her. “Are you alright? Your mind seems to be on something else.”

Liam. That’s what he was asking, she knew. Was her mind on Liam? It wasn’t. And now she couldn’t understand what she had ever seen in the boy.

Except for his looks of course. “I was thinking of Will,” she admitted.

“Are you worried about him?”

“No, not really. I think Mom is, but she’s just being Mom. She worries about all of us, but Will especially. Ever since he was born and almost didn’t survive. And after all he’s been through. So I get it. But I know Robot’s with him and will take care of him. Actually they take care of each other, really, I think. I know it wasn’t like that in the beginning, but once we were stranded, Will changed so much. He became this strong kid who we all sort of turned to for answers. I mean, everyone in our family.

“During the robot battle, when Will told Mom and Dad…and all Alpha Control I guess…that he was going to leave to try and stop the war, even Dad did what he said. Mom told Dad Will’s heart wouldn’t make it, and Dad just told her that Will said to hang on, and that’s what we were going to do. And we all sat on the Jupiter waiting for him to come back and save us. This thirteen year old kid. But he wasn’t a thirteen year old kid anymore. He was Will Robinson.

“He’s still my little brother. And I will always remember the things we did growing up. But he’s more than that now. So no, I’m not worried about him. I…”

When she didn’t finish, Vijay said, “You miss him.”

“Yes! So much. I didn’t know I would. But I do. I guess we became more than brother and sister. We became best friends. And now I just miss him.”

They had stopped on the trail while they spoke. Vijay stepped up and hugged her. “It’s almost Christmas. He’ll be back soon.”

Penny hugged him back, said, “I know,” and turned and continued up the trail. But another fifty meters or so, Vijay veered off the path.

“Where you going?” She asked.

“I want to show you something I found when I was hiking up this way,” he said. She followed him as he ducked under some low hanging limbs.

Penny was still thinking about her brother and said, “Yeah, Will will be back soon, but you know what, Vijay? I don’t think he’ll stay.”

“What do you mean?”

“I think he’s seen too much. Done too much. I mean, when he was an eleven year old boy he made contact with an alien robot, and that changed everything. For the family. For Alpha Centauri, and especially for him. SAR stabbed him in the fucking heart. It should have killed him. And Robot put part of himself in Will’s heart to save him. And Will said when he thought Robot was really gone for good, he still felt him.

“I think he’s different Vijay. He’s still the same kind, wonderful human I grew up with. But I’m not sure one planet is big enough for him anymore. I wouldn’t be surprised if one day, he and Robot just took off for some unknown galaxy and never returned. And that scares the hell out of me. I can’t imagine never seeing my brother again.”

Vijay stopped and turned to her. “And what about you, Penny? You wouldn’t want to do that?”

“Oh hell no,” She said. “I never want to get on a spaceship again as long as I live. We came here to start a new life. It’s beautiful, and I’m completely happy with it. Besides, you’re here.”

She leaned over and kissed him. When they broke the kiss she said, “You keep getting better and better at that, too.”

“Was it really that bad the first time?” He asked.

“Well how the hell would I know? It was my first kiss too,” she laughed.

“Well…you know now.”

Liam. There it was again. Does he kiss better than Liam? That’s what he was asking. “Vijay. I want to be with you, okay? Not Liam.”

“I didn’t…”

“I know. I know. You didn’t even say his name. You don’t have to. I know what you’re thinking. But you have to believe me. He was an infatuation on that planet. Nothing was right and I was just trying to figure out who I was. He was a distraction is all. But you have to stop thinking about it, okay?”

“Okay, Penny. I’m sorry.”

“Just because he was a great kisser…”

“You suck, Penny!” He said, and turned and stepped through the trees.

She laughed and followed him. But he had stopped after a few more feet. When she walked up beside him, she saw they were standing beside a little cove where the water pooled below the dam. It was surrounded by trees and flowers, and hidden from the trail.

“What do you think?” Vijay asked.

“It’s beautiful!” She said.

“I was thinking about that time you wanted me to go swimming with you, and the water was dried up.”

“Because the planet was dying,” Penny said.

“Yeah, and I thought you might want a do-over.”

She grinned. “I didn’t bring anything to swim in.”

“Yeah, neither did I.” He was grinning back at her.

Without another word, they began pulling off their clothes. They walked hand in hand to the edge of the water. It was rocky so they stepped carefully, until they were in the water up to their chests. Then they turned and kissed.

They were lying side by side in the grass at the edge of the woods an hour later. “We better go, it’s going to be dark soon,” Vijay said.

Penny sighed. “I guess. What a great idea, Vijay.” She kissed him again, then they stood up and started getting dressed.

They had taken Vijay’s Chariot, and left it off the road a little ways, next to the trailhead. When they were back and Vijay tried to start it, the engine wouldn’t turn over. “It’s never had trouble starting before.” He tried several times, then finally said, “I’ll look at the engine.”

“Will you know what you’re looking for?” She asked.

“Um…no.”

She lifted her wrist radio. “Do you know where I can find a good mechanic?”

“No,” Don answered. “I’m an officer and can no longer get my hands dirty.”

“You’re gonna leave me stranded?” She asked. “I’m a helpless little girl.”

“Yeah. That’s what you are.” He raised his voice. “Vijay, go take a look at the engine, tell me what you see.”

Vijay climbed out, opened the engine compartment. “I…I…”

“Never mind, where are you guys?”

“At the trailhead beneath the dam,” Penny said.

“Okay, give me an hour. Vijay shoot a photo of the engine and send it to me. Stand back far enough you can get the whole thing. I just want to see if a wire is off or something. These Chariot engines are sensitive. I’m driving so I’ll go by Alpha Maintenance and pick up anything I need. See you in an hour.”

Vijay took the photo, sent it, then climbed back in the Chariot. “Well we have an hour to kill,” he said. “Have any ideas?”

Penny smiled and leaned over and kissed him again. “How about a do over, do-over,” she said.

They were still kissing when Don called back on the radio. “Whatever you two are doing while you wait, now’s not the time. Someone did it. Lock the doors and stay in the Chariot.”

“Shit,” Penny said, as she pulled her shirt back on. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, a fuel sensor cap’s missing. It doesn’t just fall off, someone had to disconnect the clamps and cut a wire. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

“Thanks Don,” Penny called. “Hurry please.”

Vijay was looking out in the woods, peering all around, but it was too dark to see.

“It’ll be okay, Vijay,” Penny said.

He turned to her. “You don’t have to comfort me, Penny.”

“Hey, why the attitude?” She asked, surprised at his reaction.

“You know it was him,” Vijay said.

“I don’t know it,” she argued.

“And how many times have you seen him lurking around since you broke up with him?”

“A couple. Once in the store and once across the street. But it could be coincidence.”

“Come on, Penny! He’s stalking you!”

She was going to argue, but she saw the anger in his eyes. She lifted her wrist, “Liam, come in,” She said.

There was silence for awhile, then finally he answered, “Penny, what’s wrong, you miss me?”

“Don’t fuck around, Liam, where are you?”

“What an attitude. I’m home, what’s going on?”

“Someone messed with Vijay’s Chariot.”

“Okay, I’ll be there in a few. Sit tight.”

“I don’t need you to save me, Liam, I need you to leave me alone.”

“I have left you alone, since you told me you made your choice. What’s this all about?”

“You didn’t ask where I was, just that you would be here. You’re already here aren’t you?”

“That’s what I would have done next! You didn’t give me time to ask!”

“Liam, stop fucking around!” Vijay said.

“Wow, you sound dangerous, suddenly, Vijay.”

“That’s enough Liam,” Penny said. “What did you do to the Chariot?”

“You know, you guys are boring, and I have things to do. Talk to you later. Vijay, next time I’ll give you some pointers. I know what she likes.”

“You don’t know a damn thing about what I like, Liam!” Penny said. But the radio was silent.

She looked at Vijay. “Liam and I didn’t do anything…”

“Penny, stop. He’s a dick. I’m not worried about what he says, I’m worried that he might try to hurt you.”

“He’s not dangerous. He’s just arrogant.”

They sat in silence for another thirty minutes, watching the woods. Penny was scared, but she was also thinking that Liam had been watching everything she and Vijay had done. She shivered at the thought.

“Cold?” Vijay asked.

“No, just a little freaked out.”

They saw lights turn off the road, and Don pulled a Chariot up beside them.

Vijay and Penny climbed out and met them. “Are you okay?” Judy asked, stepping out of Don’s Chariot on the passenger side.

“Yeah, I’m fine. We’re fine,” Penny said.

Don was already looking at the engine, and Vijay joined him.

“You didn’t see anyone in the woods or around the Chariot?” Judy asked.

“No, we hiked up to the dam, and when we got back to the Chariot, it wouldn’t start.”

“Your hair got pretty wet hiking up to the dam,” Judy said, giving her a sarcastic grin.

Penny flashed her a quick smile.

Judy turned and was looking into the woods. She had a flashlight with her, and began shining it all around.

“Someone definitely did it,” Don said.

“I think…” Vijay said.

“It was probably some kids out here hiking and just messing with us,” Penny finished his sentence, then looked over at Vijay.

He hesitated, then said, “Yeah, probably that.”

“Hey. What are you two doing together?” Penny asked.

“We…” Don started to answer then stopped.

“We just ran into each other in town and were talking when you called,” Judy said.

Don glanced at her. She had decided not to tell them they had planned to meet up. Judy must have felt the the same as he did. Didn’t want to give them the wrong idea. Though it did make him wonder exactly what Judy had been thinking when she asked him to meet her for dinner.

“Well, it’ll start now,” Don said. “I’ll follow you guys into town in case you have any more trouble.”

“Thanks, Don,” Vijay said, and climbed in the driver’s seat, and Penny climbed in next to him.

Judy hesitated, then turned and gave Don a hug. “It was great seeing you Don.”

“You too, Doc. See you at Christmas.”

Judy climbed in the backseat behind Penny. As they turned on to the road to head back to town, the boy looked out from the trees where he had been well concealed. He smiled to himself as the tail lights of the Chariots disappeared in the dark.

Chapter Text

Three Days until Christmas.

Total darkness. It reminded Will of a trip he had taken with his family when he was eight years old. Carter Caves in Kentucky. It was long after the park system had stopped taking guided tours, though Will suspected his father preferred it that way.

John had outfitted the family with spelunking gear and head lamps, and they spent several days exploring one of the caves that had never been opened for tourists. No walkways, no bridges linking one section to another, no steps or ladders. Just the narrow, winding tunnels. At one point, John told them all to turn off their lamps and any electronics they carried with them, and experience complete darkness.

Even at that age, Will knew total darkness was an impossibility, at least on Earth. There was always the presence of photons. But in the cave, after several seconds, when the light photons were too insufficient to excite the optical nerves, it was impossible to perceive any light whatsoever. He remembered putting his hand inches in front of his face, and could sense nothing. It was frightening and fascinating at the same time.

And that’s what this was. A complete absence of light. He had a feeling of floating, though he wasn’t sure he was going in any particular direction. Suddenly he knew where he was. He had fallen backwards off the ladder after pushing the battery up to Judy. She had taken it, then turned back to him, and the last thing he had seen was her hand reaching down toward him, and his father jumping in the water beside her.

And then the darkness.

But he was aware. And as he drifted—lower he assumed—he found himself anticipating what was next. It was calling to him. And whatever it was, he had this overwhelming desire to keep going until he discovered it. Be it good or bad. It was like he had no choice in the matter at all. And maybe he didn’t.

Will was startled awake. Robot’s hand was on his shoulder. He looked up at his friend.

“Family,” Robot said.

For a few seconds, Will didn’t know where he was. Then he smiled up at Robot. “It was just the dream again, Robot. I guess you felt it.” He sat up and looked around. They were in the forest. They had found it wasn’t that difficult for the Chariot to make it’s way through, and had made good time. Another day and they should be near the canyon, then they had to hike.

The weather was perfect, and Will hadn’t erected the tent. He just slept in the backseat of the Chariot with the door open, and Robot stood by him all night, just like he would do in his bedroom back on Alpha Centauri or his cabin on the Jupiter 2. Will usually slept soundly knowing Robot was there. Though sometimes he dreamed. And sometimes the dreams weren’t so good.

But this particular dream wasn’t frightening to him, and he didn’t understand why. It had been. When he was going into the water, and then when he realized he was not going to get back out. The fear had been overwhelming. But this time, it was different. The fear had passed and it was the expectation of what was ahead. The wonder.

As he crawled out of the Chariot, Will thought there was a surprising lack of insects on this part of the planet, which made it easy for him to get to sleep with no protection from the environment.

He yawned, stood and stretched, and thought of his dream again. While in the dream, he had the sensation of floating in total darkness, but now it seemed different. Almost like instead of the absence of light surrounding him, he had been staring into a black void, and for some reason he felt the need to enter it, just to see what was inside.

On the other side.

Will’s eyes had been shut as he stretched, but now they flew open. On the other side. Where had that thought come from?

Robot had been standing beside him, watching him closely, but now stepped in front of Will, and again placed a hand on his shoulder.

“I’m okay, Robot. The dream was a little weird, is all. Let me brush my teeth and get ready and we’ll get going.”

As Will prepared to leave, he felt the thought coming on again, that the further he got from his family, the easier it was to just keep going. Maybe this was what he was meant to be, he thought. A boy without a home. Forever wandering from planet to planet, solar system to solar system, galaxy to galaxy. His only companion, Robot. His best friend. What would that be like?

He again thought of the year they had spent away from the adults. He and his siblings had become independent. From their parents, from everyone they knew, and then finally from each other. They loved each other of course. But their lives had changed. Judy was no longer just their older sister, she was the captain and had ninety seven children to care for. Penny had her boys. Though Will knew that had more to do with her rebellion from Judy and everything that had separated them from their Mom and Dad.

And himself? He had Robot, but there was a part of him that was utterly alone. He had known ever since SAR had come after him, had called him by his name, he was alone.

He thought he could handle it, but though he would never admit it to his sisters, he had felt abandoned by them to a degree. By everyone, really. It had been a very strange time for him. Like he had gone from being the little boy that everyone protected, to suddenly an adult that everyone looked to for answers. Though he was only twelve when they first landed, and turned thirteen a month later.

And while he was much smarter than the normal twelve year old, and had already gone through so much, that part of him that was still the small boy who had been so frightened only a year earlier just wanted his mother. And in her absence—his sisters—who had always been there for him when his mother wasn’t.

But once on the planet, he felt as if he didn’t have anyone. And he was never one to complain, especially since almost one hundred children had been separated from their parents as well. But they weren’t being counted on to get the Jupiter engines operational. They weren’t being hunted by a killer robot.

And he had no one to talk to about that. His parents were gone, of course, and he wasn’t about to make his siblings feel guilty. Judy did have so much to deal with. And Penny? She was struggling with things on her own. The separation from their parents. The teen years where boys were the most important thing to her. Her anger with Judy. The last thing Will was going to do was to burden her with his problems. He would just keep them to himself, and deal. And eventually leave them all to confront SAR.

So he had made peace with it. At least he told himself he had. But now, he wasn’t sure. He was very introspective, and hoped he wasn’t carrying a resentment around with him that was causing these feelings about leaving them all behind.

“Robinsons stick together, Will.” He heard Judy’s voice like she was sitting right there next to him. But it wasn’t her, he knew. He looked up at Robot again. He knew it was his friend, reading his thoughts. Feeling what he felt. And pulling him back from the edge.

Now the memories of his family flashed across his mind like he was flipping through a photo album. He and Penny on the beach back home when the sky was still blue. He couldn’t have been more than three years old. Penny on a horse at their grandmother’s farm. Judy, making a tent with him in the living room with furniture and blankets, one night when she was babysitting.

He smiled and sent the message back to his friend: I know Robot. Robinson’s stick together. Thanks.

Robot had done this before when he felt Will begin to think about just…going. He brought him back with memories of his family. And they seemed to be more than memories. Like Robot could see his past, and would somehow make Will see it as well. And this would usually get him back from the edge, make him want to be with his family. But the feeling would return a few days later.

It had started just before they left to explore the galaxy. Robot sent him a memory of him and Judy building sand castles. Will was only two years old, and would never have been able to remember it. But it seemed like Robot was showing it to him for some reason. Just like he was there. And the longer they were in space, just the two of them, it seemed to happen more often. Especially when Will had one of these thoughts about not returning.

They drove all day until they found a clearing in the forest, just as it was getting dark. Will spent the night lying in the back seat with Robot standing above him again, and the next morning they were out of the woods and Will pulled the Chariot up a few meters from the edge of the canyon and climbed out. Robot joined him and they walked to the edge and looked over. “Not too steep,” Will said. “But we need to find a way down. Let me pack the tent and sleeping bag and gear first.”

Robot didn’t answer, he just scanned the canyon from the right to the left and waited for Will to pack. When Will joined him, Robot reached out a hand to take the pack that Will carried.

“It’s okay, I can handle it,” Will said.

“No,” Robot answered.

Will smiled at his friend. He seldom heard him use that word, but Will knew Robot was just being sensible. He could handle the pack with his gear, but Robot could carry it like it wasn’t even there. He took his video camera out of the pack, hooked it to his belt so he would have easy access to it, then stepped up to Robot, looped one strap over Robot’s shoulder and said, “Thanks, Robot. I guess it does make more sense.”

Robot turned and began walking along the rim. Will followed him. After an hour or so, he stopped and looked back at Will. “What is it?” The boy asked.

Robot pointed.

“A trail,” Will said. “Someone has been here. Or something. It doesn’t look like a game trail." He looked back up at Robot, “Not going to say it?”

Robot just looked back, his lights swirling in his face shield. “No danger,” Will said. “That’s different.”

Robot walked onto the trail and started down. Will followed.

The canyon had low growing shrubbery along the sides, and at the bottom, a narrow stream cut through it, and along the stream, Will could see green grass and sparse woods. So far they had not seen any alien life. It took them until mid-afternoon to make it to the bottom, where Will sat on a rock and took his canteen out, and an MRE that he had packed in his backpack.

Robot watched him as he ate. “Do you ever wish you could eat like we do, just to see what it tastes like?” Will asked. “Not that this is that good. It’s supposed to be meatloaf, but it’s not like the meatloaf Grandma used to make back on the farm.”

And suddenly Will missed her. She had died when he was nine years old. Maureen had inherited the farm, but by that time, the Alpha project was in full swing and she never had time to go out there any more. She ended up selling it, along with everything on it, including the three horses that had been a part of his childhood. He had been pretty upset by it at the time, but even though she never particularly liked living on a farm, he knew it bothered his mother more than it did him, and like always, he tried to be supportive. So he never let anyone know how much it bothered him.

Then he was sitting on the front porch swing with this Mother and Grandmother, on a summer day when he was seven years old. Judy was in the front yard with Penny, both of them on horses.

“Why can’t I go?” Will asked his mom.

Before she could answer, his grandmother said, “You’re too little, Will. If your mother isn’t with you, you need to stay here.” Now Will remembered that day, and that his mother had brought work out to the farm with them, and didn’t have time to go for a ride.

“I’ll take him,” Judy said.

“Really?” Will asked.

“Can I, Mom?” Judy asked. She was only fourteen and though she was a good rider, they had never trusted the kids to go horseback riding by themselves before.

“No, Will…” his Grandmother said again.

“Why not?” His mother asked, glancing at his grandmother. “I trust Judy to take care of him.”

“Seriously?” Will asked.

“Seriously,” his Mom said. He looked at his grandmother, but she remained silent, and Will suddenly had the feeling it was more about something between his Mom and Grandmother than it was about him. They loved each other, but it seemed like their grandma always had advice for the way Maureen was raising the kids.

Will jumped up and ran down the steps, and Penny slid off her horse and helped him climb up behind Judy as his oldest sister reached down and took his hand to pull him up.

They had walked the horses slowly down the lane toward the fields, but once out of site of the house, Judy said, “You ready to go a little faster Will?”

“Yeah!” He said.

“Okay, but hold on to my waist.” She waited until he had a good grip, then they began galloping. Will had almost forgotten that day, but now it was as if he was actually there again, Penny and Judy running the horses while Will clung to Judy and laughed the entire time. He remembered now how much fun it was and was reminded of how much his two sisters loved him.

The memory disappeared and he was looking at Robot’s face shield. “I…Robot, did you do that? It was more than a memory. Even more than before. I was actually there. You did it didn’t you?”

Robot didn’t answer. He didn’t have to. “I see what you’re doing,” Will said. “But I didn’t know you could do that. Can you see my memories? I mean, clearly, like that?"

“Yes, Will Robinson.”

“And you sent it back to me, didn’t you? So I could remember how much I need my sisters.”

Robot just looked at him. Will smiled. “Yes. I love them. I don’t want to be anywhere that I can’t be part of their lives. Thank you.”

Then he had an idea. “I want to try something, Robot.” He took a bite of the meatloaf, chewed it slowly, then reached out with his mind. He felt the connection, and concentrated on the food. The texture. The flavor. And while he knew the flavor left a lot to be desired, he also knew Robot wouldn’t have any idea.

He chewed slowly, then swallowed, while looking directly at Robot’s face shield. The lights in it changed, swirling fast, going in several different directions at once, before slowing and coming back together. Will could sense the pleasure in him.

“You could sense the flavor, couldn’t you?” He asked.

“Yes, Will Robinson.”

“And you liked it.”

“Yes, Will Robinson.”

“Well, wait till we get back to Alpha Centauri and you get to experience some of Mom’s food. You’ll forget all about this.”

Then he smiled. “Yeah, I see what you’re doing. Don’t worry, we’re going back. Want to eat the rest with me?”

“Yes, Will Robinson.”

Will smiled, and ate each bite slowly, chewing, swallowing, while at the same time concentrating on staying connected to Robot.

Finally, they continued on down the canyon, looking for a place to cross the narrow river. We’re changing, Will thought as they walked. It was like they were growing even closer together. The memory Robot had caused him to experience was startling. He was actually on the horse with his sister. And the way Robot had been able to experience the flavor of the food. He wondered again at the advanced civilization that had created the robots.

Eventually, they found a place to cross, then they climbed up the other side. But half way up, Will saw there was a crevasse going back inside the cliff wall. They hadn’t seen it from the floor of the canyon. “You know we have to check it out, Robot.” Will smiled up at his friend.

Robot didn’t answer, but again, Will felt his agreement. Robot was connected to him, and to his family now almost as much, but he seemed to still have a sense of adventure. Will didn’t know if that was Robot, or if he somehow picked it up from him. Once the robots were released from their programming, they all were different in their own ways, so it could have been either.

They walked back into the crevasse. It was wide in the beginning, like a large opening in the side of the canyon wall, but several meters in, the sides grew closer together. “It’s going to be tight, but I think you can make it all the way in, Robot.”

“Yes, Will Robinson.” Robot had already calculated the dimensions of the passageway.

Will was leading now. They walked between the walls, Robot turning sideways on the narrowest part. It went on that way for eight or nine meters, then the walls widened again, and they were standing in an opening. It wasn’t a cave, and they could see the blue sky above, another fifty meters or so up to the top of the canyon. But Will wasn’t looking up at the sky, he was looking at the far wall.

“I can’t believe it, Robot,” he said quietly.

There were drawings. Stick figures of men and animals, most of the animals looked like any you would find on Earth. Horses, and some that resembled antelope, and possibly water buffalo. And some that could have been bears and lions. There were zebras, Will could tell by the stripes drawn on them, though they could have also been hyenas, it was hard to say, as the head looked somewhere between the elongated horse-like head of a zebra, and the round face of a hyena. Even the ears were somewhere in between the long pointed equestrian ears, or small cat-like ears.

But, he also saw what appeared to be dinosaurs. The planet was in close enough proximity to the other planet in the system they had just left, that an advanced civilization could have visited it, and these depictions could have been from what they had seen there. Or they could have existed on this planet. Still could, Will thought. They were ancient drawings, certainly not done by an advanced civilization. But Will thought there could be another answer.

“I don’t know if the planet is still populated, Robot,” Will said. “But it was at one time. And either these animals lived here or…” he looked up at Robot’s face shield, “…someone from here has been to Earth. Or a planet a lot like Earth. And if it was Earth, they were there so long ago, dinosaurs were not yet extinct.”

He walked along the wall. The drawings covered almost the entire length of it, more than four meters. Will stopped and took out his video camera. “This is Will Robinson, of the First Human-Robot Exploratory Group. And we may have discovered the first link to early tribal societies of Earth, and an alien culture. These drawings seem to depict animals that existed on Earth thousands of years ago, and many of them still exist today. The most likely explanation is that that these species populated this planted at one time, though this theory will need further investigation.”

He panned slowly from the left to the right, capturing the entire wall, before turning the camera off, then walking closer. Finally he saw something that was different than the other drawings, and yet familiar to him. There was a sketch of a figure that appeared to resemble a human, and next to it, he saw what he was really looking for. He stopped recording, and took a photo from several angles. Then held his wrist radio up for Robot to look at, and found a photo on it that he had taken before leaving Alpha Centauri.

“See? It was a mask. Used in religious ceremonies. They still use them today, or at least they did before the war. No one knows if the tribe even exists anymore, since that part of the continent has been cut off. But even with the last contact with the tribe, they really didn’t remember what the significance of the mask meant. They just knew they had been passed down from one generation to the next. There are all kinds of interpretations. But we both know what the mask looks like.”

Robot looked closely at the photo, then back at the sketching on the wall. It was of a human, wearing a mask that was identical to the photo of the one Will had on his radio. “Yes, Will Robinson.”

“Robot, do you know what this means? Even if we don’t find any life?”

Robot just stared back. Will realized his friend probably didn’t know what it meant. At least not enough to be excited about it. “This is why we are here, Robot. It’s proof an ancient tribe on Earth knew of this planet thousands of years ago.” But Will was looking for more. 

After throughly documenting the drawings on the wall, they left the crevasse and continued up the trail to the top of the canyon. By the time they had climbed out, it was almost dark. “Guess we better stop for the night, Robot,” Will said. “It seems like there’s nothing here to hurt us…or me, I guess I should say. I’m not going to pitch the tent tonight. Ready to eat dinner?”

“Yes, Will Robinson,” Robot said, and Will again noticed the lights in his face shield began making the unusual patterns, that the boy could now see was a sign of excitement. Will smiled. It was fun getting to know more about his best friend, and maybe the two of them needed this time alone to develop even a stronger bond than they already had.

“Okay, but promise me you’ll take me back to Disney Land when I was eleven, just before we went to space.” It was another great memory for Will. Judy had taken him and Penny there a few weeks before their father returned and the family left for Alpha Centauri. While the air was bad that day, it also helped to keep the crowds down, and the three of them spent the whole day from the time the park opened until it closed. While none of them voiced it, they all knew it would be the last time they would be there, and they wanted to enjoy every minute.

Robot took Will’s memories back there as he had before. Unlike when he was seven, Will had clear memories of that day, but still, whatever it was Robot was doing, he made this more than a memory. Will felt as if he was actually back there.

One thing he had forgotten, but now remembered as he experienced it through whatever this was that Robot could do with his memories, at the end of the day, when they walked outside the park, Will had turned and looked back at the entrance, and stood there for a minute or so. Judy had walked up and put her arm around him. She knew her little brother, and that in many ways he was an old soul, even when he was so young. She knew he was silently bidding goodbye to a place where some of his fondest childhood memories had come from.

As he remembered the day, like before, it wasn’t the theme park and all the fun they had that stood out so much to Will, but it was the time he spent with his two sisters—just the three of them—that was so good. Will fell asleep that night knowing as soon as they were done on this planet, he wanted to get home and see them as quickly as possible. And maybe he wouldn’t leave again. It was a pleasant thought.

Chapter Text

Penny was sitting at the kitchen table working on a new book. It wasn’t really new, it was sort of an addendum to Lost In Space. Her tentative title was, Found In Space, about the year they had survived without their parents. She had decided that year was the year she had found out who she was. So this was not really so much about the family and their adventures, but more about herself, and who she had become in that twelve months.

It wasn’t that she had finished writing Lost In Space, though everyone in the family thought she had, when she said it was the end of the first chapter. She just told them that because she needed a break from it, and for some strange reason, she didn’t want to admit that to everyone. She was surrounded by a family of geniuses, but writing was her thing. And trying to explain to them she couldn’t finish this book was something she wasn’t willing to do. She hadn’t let them read it yet past what Will had published for them, saying she still had some edits and rewrites to do. But the truth was, she didn’t want to let them know it wasn’t finished.

She had written up to the moment they realized Will was missing after reuniting with the family, and that he had gone to confront SAR alone. She had tried several times to write everything that had happened that night, but she just couldn’t.

At first she couldn’t really remember everything, and she found that strange. She could recall when they discovered Will missing, then the family taking the Jupiter, flying low over the surface of the planet, looking everywhere for the Chariot. And she could remember their frantic flight to Alpha Centauri, with Will in the cryo tube. But everything in between had been blank for a long time.

She had read about this phenomenon. Sometimes, during stressful situations, a person’s mind just seemed to forget some of the things that happened, or put them out of order. Which is why eyewitness testimony was often unreliable. But, in most cases the memories would begin to return. And they had. She recalled someone had spotted the Chariot. Don maybe? Her mother? They had landed the Jupiter, and Robot ran out ahead of the rest of them. Then they were all running after him.

At first she hadn’t seen Will. But when they were almost to the Chariot she spotted her brother, facing SAR. Then, something happened to him. She couldn’t see what it was, but his body had gone rigid, and he sort of pivoted to his left, and seemed to crumple to the ground. It had reminded her of a puppet show someone had put on at her school when she was in first or second grade, and how the puppets just seemed to collapse at the end. Like everything they had been seconds earlier had just dissipated, and all that was left was an empty, lifeless shell.

And this was the thought that had gone through her mind as she ran toward her brother that night. She was back in grade school, watching the end of the puppet show. Except this wasn’t a puppet. It was her brother.

And try as she might, she just could not bring herself to write about that. About running up to Will and kneeling on the ground beside him. About his silent, motionless body, already turning pale, the blood flowing out of his heart and staining his clothes, as her father lifted him in his arms.

She had tried several times to write about it, and had actually gotten physically ill as she tried to recall all the details of that night. And so she had stopped there, skipping that part and waiting for the time when she could face it all enough to put into words.

She knew she would have to come back to it. A good writer had to face her fears and insecurities, and had to be able to tell horrible stories, if they were true. But she had put it on hiatus until that time came, and decided to write about the year they were stranded.

The problem she was having, was that it was still very difficult to write something about herself that didn’t include her brother. She and Judy had drifted more apart that year, before coming back together when they had climbed to find the titanium deposit. But the whole year before that, they were definitely not close. And she knew much of that was her fault. She just couldn’t stop blaming Judy for splitting up the family.

But with Will it was different. Before, she had always been his companion, and his older sister. But that year, things had changed so much for them both. Will had grown, not just physically, which he had certainly done, but emotionally as well. She knew much of it wasn’t good. He had withdrawn inside himself. The pressure to try and get them off the planet was what she and Judy had thought caused it. But of course, he had planned to leave them and confront SAR, which was the real issue he was dealing with.

And that had caused him to mature so much in that year. To the point she felt as much like his younger sister as his older one. He had become so strong, and it was his support and encouragement that made her become stronger and believe in herself more. So how could she write this story about herself, without writing it about Will?

She paused as she looked at the page, trying to find the words. She had discovered an odd thing about herself. She couldn’t plan what she wanted to write. She would have a vague idea, and start thinking about it, but then she would get stuck. Stuck to the point of not even trying. At times like these, she decided she could never be a writer.

But then she would start writing and the words seemed to come out. Even just one sentence would make the words flow. Like they wrote themselves. Or like there was a demon inside of her that could only be released once she began writing. A Genie in a bottle, she liked to think. So she looked at the blank page, something she had been doing for almost four weeks, thinking. Nothing seemed to work. So she wrote a paragraph:

As I stepped into the morning sunlight from the darkness of the utility tent, I saw Will walk from the Transport Jupiter and stand looking out at the camp. He had changed so much. He was almost a foot taller. He was quieter. Serious. I seldom saw him laugh anymore. We looked at each other and there was the hint of a smile on his face. But it quickly went away. He turned and walked back inside.

“Damn it! It’s not about Will!” She said.

She turned and looked out the window. She sighed and thought, Where are you little brother?

“It’s always about him somehow, isn’t it?”

She looked up as Judy walked in.

“I didn’t know I said that out loud,” Penny said.

“He’ll be okay,” Judy said.

“We all keep saying that Judy. Because he’s always been okay. With all the close calls we’ve all had, Will had so many more. He about died in the tree. He almost floated away in space. SAR could have killed him in the cave. SAR almost did kill him. He stabbed him in the fucking heart!

“Will’s had so much more to deal with. And he’s always been okay. But what if he isn’t? Have you ever thought about what our family would have been like if he had died on that planet? Maybe in the fire? Or maybe Dad would have forced him to go into the water and something might have happened and he died. What would we all be like if that had happened?”

“We would have been crushed,” Judy said. “And maybe we never would have gotten over it, really. But we would have went on. Because that’s what Will would have wanted us to do.”

“Jesus Christ, Judy, this isn’t a TV show. ‘That’s what Will would have wanted us to do.’ He would have been dead! Fucking dead! You know what he would have wanted? He would have wanted to be alive! You know what he would have wanted us to do? He would have wanted us to take him to the park and push him on the swings again, like we used to when he was little. That’s what he would have wanted us to do. He would have wanted us to watch a movie with him, or play cards with him, or go hiking with him one more time. That’s what he would have wanted us to do.”

Judy was taken aback by Penny’s furious response, but she remained calm. She sat down beside her sister. “I know, Penny. I know. You’re right. That’s what he would have wanted. All those things. I just mean, Will—the Will we both know—would have wanted us to be okay. And eventually, we would have been. Because we would know that’s what he would want.”

“I think you give us all too much credit,” Penny said. “I think Will is the glue that keeps us together. SAR almost took the heart of the whole family when he tried to take Will’s heart. I’m not sure how we would have been had something happened to him.”

“Penny, you’re just worried about him…”

“You’re goddamn right I’m worried about him! Why would Mom and Dad let him do this, Judy? He’s fourteen years old! He might be as tall as an adult and smarter than just about anyone we know, but he’s still a kid. It’s just fucking irresponsible of them!” Tears came to her eyes as she said this.

“Penny. Calm down. You were excited for him when he left too. It’s just, since he isn’t back, you’re worried. I get it. You two were always close, but you became a lot closer when we were stranded. But he’s my brother too, and I love him every bit as much as you do. And I’m telling you he’ll be fine. I mean, I always took care of him. You know that.”

“Yes, you took care of both of us. And that’s what made it harder when you couldn’t. I think Will and I got closer because you two got further apart. And, as strong as Will is now—or seems—I think that bothered him. You were always his protector, then you had so many other kids you were responsible for, I think he just tried to make the most of it.”

“Did he say anything like that to you?” Judy asked, troubled by her words.

“Not really. You know Will, he would never complain about something like that. But one day I was walking through camp with him, and you were with a group of kids, and he called ‘hi’ to you, but you didn’t even notice us. And he said, ‘I miss her.’ He said it under his breath, and I knew he was really talking to himself. But he did miss you, Judy.”

Judy didn’t say anything, but Penny could tell she was bothered by it, just by her expression. So she quickly added, “but he understood. He had a huge responsibility too. Both of you did.”

“All of us did, Penny.”

“Sure. I was just the sister. You know that. Will knew it too. But, I think he was right. He knew me more than I knew myself. I never would have done that with the engine, or connected to Sally, if Will hadn’t been there for me.”

“But…”

“Judy, it’s okay. We both knew your responsibilities were beyond us that year. I guess my way of coping was with the boys, as you called them. But Will knew I needed more than that. I needed my siblings. So he tried to be there when he knew you couldn’t. And you know what? He did pretty well. And I’m afraid he did a better job with me than I did with him. And that meant he was truly alone. And that whole time, he knew he was going to confront SAR. I just…I just worry that he’s changed from it all.”

Judy again saw the hurt in her eyes. “He’ll be okay, I promise,” she said. “And he’ll be back.”

“You don’t know that. Mom and Dad don’t know that. And they never should have let him go.”

Judy decided not to argue anymore with her, and she was thinking of what her sister had said. That she had sort of been absent for her two younger siblings that year. She decided at that second she would never do that again, regardless of her responsibilities. “About last night, who do you think did that to the Chariot?”

“Like we said, probably some kids out messing around,” Penny answered, but when she looked quickly back down at the tablet, Judy knew she wasn’t being honest.

“You think Liam did it, don’t you?” Judy asked.

“No. I mean…why would he?”

“Well, Will told me he didn’t take it so well when you broke up with him.”

“What can I say? I’m irreplaceable.”

Judy noted Penny’s attempt at humor and snark was not really working this time. She stood up, walked to the other side of the table and hugged her. “Will’s gonna be okay, Penny.”

Penny hugged her back without answering for a couple minutes, then she said, “I think I just miss him.”

Judy said, “I do too, Penny.” Then she released her and said, “I’ve got to run.”

“You work today? I thought you were off this weekend since you worked last weekend.”

“No, just need to run a few errands. See you later.” She stopped at the door and turned back to her. “He’ll be fine, Penny.”

Penny smiled at her and watched out the window as her sister walked across the lawn to the Chariot. She looked back down at what she had written. She tore the page out, crumpled it, then wrote across the next blank one at an angle, covering the entire page: “Where are you Will??”

She carried the journal back to her room, then walked to her brother’s room. She went inside and sat on his bed. She laid down and looked up at the ceiling. She remembered again when they had finally left the water planet, and made it back to the Resolute, only to find it abandoned, and Scarecrow roaming the halls trying to kill any human survivors. And how she had held her hand over Will’s mouth to try and keep him quiet. Safe.

Now he was out there alone, and she couldn’t take care of him. Well, he wasn’t alone. Robot was with him of course. Robot was part of him. But so was she. And she missed him. She sighed.

“Where are you Will?” She said. She rolled to her side and looked at his bookshelf along the wall. On top of it was his baseball, and the model of Robot she had helped him make after Will had told him to walk off the cliff. He had hurt so much then, and she tried to comfort him, but there wasn’t much that could be done. And she felt it was that moment when he might have begun to grow up quicker than a boy his age should. He did something he felt he had to do, to protect his family. But to do it, he hurt something else he loved, and he hurt himself as well. He had never had many friends, and the one friend he had, the best friend he had ever had, he destroyed to protect everyone. That’s when she realized he was a lot stronger than any of them had ever thought.

She scanned the book case. There weren’t that many books. The weight restrictions kept them from taking many with them from Earth. Besides, practically everyone read them digitally now. But Will was strangely nostalgic for a boy his age, and had managed to smuggle a few on board. Books that he had loved when he was a small child. There was a copy of Cloud Atlas, a sci-fi novel he had always loved, Huck Finn, because Penny had told him he had to bring a classic if he was actually going to smuggle any books on board, and two comic books. She smiled, thinking about all the hours she had to spend when he was little, listening to him talk about comic books. And there was one on UFOs. He used to be really into that before they left for space. She didn’t think there was any need to read books like that now. They obviously existed. She got up, walked over and picked the book up and scanned through it. There were some photos and diagrams in the middle. None of it meant much to her. She put the book back and sat down again on his bed.

“Where are you little brother?” She said.

As Judy drove away, she thought about what Penny had said. She remembered when they landed on the first planet. The unnamed planet. The one that had changed everything for them. She remembered when Will had climbed up to the surface, and she was below him, then found out she couldn’t fit through the hatch opening. Will had been so frightened looking back down at her. She remembered she said, “Don’t go anywhere. We’ll come around.” Then she gave him a quick, encouraging smile.

And she realized she missed that. Taking care of her siblings. She knew that a mother probably felt the same way, when her child no longer relied on her to take care of them. Make them feel secure in a world that was much bigger than they were. “Well, I won’t stop taking care of them, no matter how old they get,” she said aloud. “Starting right now.”

Judy pulled up at the house that Liam lived in with his parents. She saw the tall boy in the backyard, mowing the lawn. She turned the Chariot off, climbed out, and walked between Liam’s house and the house next to it, and waited until the boy turned around and started back in her direction. He shut the mower down and walked toward her.

“Hi, Judy,” he said, speaking pleasantly.

“Leave my sister alone,” Judy said.

“What are you talking about?”

“You know what I’m talking about. Leave my sister alone.”

“Look, if this is about the Chariot, she called me last night about it too, and I told her I had nothing to do with it.”

“You lied to her and you’re lying to me.”

“Judy, look, I like your sister. A lot. And I was upset. I think she could do a lot better than Vijay…”

“Like you?”

“Of course, and better than me too. But I would never do anything to hurt her.”

“I don’t believe you,” Judy said.

“I can’t help that, but I’m telling you the truth.”

“Just stay the hell away from her.”

“Judy. I respect you guys. I respect you. I think what you did with all those kids for a year was amazing. I would never do anything to hurt you or your family. Whether you believe me or not.”

“You heard me Liam, stay away from her.” She turned around, walked back to the Chariot and drove off. He sounded sincere, but she knew the boy was lying.

When she was back home her mom and dad were sitting in the kitchen, drinking coffee.

She greeted them, poured herself a cup of coffee and sat down. “Where’s Penny?” She asked.

“She left,” Maureen said. “She called Vijay to come pick her up. She was upset with us and we got in a bit of an argument.”

“About Will?”

“How did you know?” Maureen asked.

“We talked this morning.”

“The thing is, we can’t really disagree with her,” John said. “It seemed fine at the time, letting him go. But it’s almost Christmas.”

“And no way to get any kind of message to him,” Judy said.

“We’ve tried,” Maureen said. “But he hasn’t sent us a message either, which means they haven’t come back through the rift from…wherever they are. I’m sure once he does and is close enough he’ll message us and let us know he’s okay.”

“So what do we do if Christmas gets here and we’ve heard nothing?” Judy asked.

John and Maureen just looked at each other, but they didn’t have an answer.

“Do we try to find him?” Judy asked.

“I don’t know how we could,” John said. “They could be anyplace in the galaxy.”

“What about some of the robots?” Judy asked.

“We’ve tried.” Maureen said. “Don and I have asked all of them if it’s possible for them to connect to Robot, like SAR did when he took over. But I think once their old programming was discontinued, their connection to each other was lost. They don’t even seem to know what we’re asking.”

“So all we can do is wait?” Judy said.

“All we can do is wait,” Maureen answered.

Chapter Text

Two Days until Christmas.

Will woke to find Robot standing over him as always. He had slept peacefully that night. No dreams that he could remember, and he thought maybe it had been that memory of being at Disneyland with his sisters that had comforted him, and put these thoughts of leaving behind him. He greeted his best friend, stood up, rolled his sleeping bag and tucked it in his backpack. They again shared a meal.

“Do you like it?” Will asked.

It was a breakfast burrito, MRE style, and Will thought it had very little flavor, but Robot said, “Yes, Will Robinson,” then quickly sent the boy a memory of the last Thanksgiving he had spent at his grandmother’s house.

He was eight years old, his dad was home, though he would be leaving for a long deployment soon, and they all enjoyed dinner, then played football in the front yard, while Will’s grandmother sat on the porch swing and watched. Now Will realized, it was the last Thanksgiving the family had shared together before going to space, as John would leave for almost three years after that, and only come back before leaving for Alpha Centauri.

When the memory passed, Will looked up at his friend. “Thanks, Robot. You always seem to know exactly what I need, don’t you?”

Robot stared back at him, and Will sensed that he said, yes Will Robinson, without him speaking the words.

Will took his monocular from his belt and looked across the swampy surface toward the blood red hills in the distance. “Half a day to get there, if we don’t have any trouble in the swamp, you think?”

“Yes,” Robot said.

“Okay, we better get going. We have two days, and I bet they’re pretty worried about us already.”

From this planet’s location in the galaxy, Will knew there was no way to get a message to his family. They weren’t that far from Alpha Centauri. Actually closer than they were from Earth to Alpha, but the Deep Space Network that Alpha Centauri had just completed to allow communication from much greater distances was destroyed in the robot attack. Will knew they could get a radio signal back once they came through the rift, but that would still not happen until Christmas Eve morning at the earliest.

For the first time, Will was afraid he had pushed things a little too far. He loved his family and didn’t want them to worry about him. We probably should have gone back instead of heading out to the hills, he thought.

“Yes, Will Robinson,” Robot said.

Will looked at him. He had read his thoughts. And for the first time, he felt something he had never experienced from Robot. Disappointment. “I’m sorry, Robot,” Will said. “Next time I’ll listen.”

“Friend, Will Robinson,” Robot said. He seemed unsettled about this feeling as well.

Will stopped and turned to him and placed a hand on his arm. “Robot. We’re growing. We’re friends. Best friends. And sometimes we’ll disappoint each other. Because that’s what friends do. But it isn’t serious. It’s just something that happens. But I’m sorry. I should have listened to you. I don’t want to scare the family either. We’ll hurry, then head right back, okay?”

“Yes, Will Robinson.” He paused, as if thinking of something more, then said, “Friends.”

“Best friends,” Will said.

“Best…friends.”

Will smiled at him. “That’s a great new word, Robot.”

They headed across the swamp. The trees were different than any trees on earth, at least any Will had ever seen before or seen pictures of. They were tall, as tall as the Redwoods back in Northern California he had seen several times during trips with his family, though not as large a circumference. And they were sparse, at least a hundred yards or more between them. And they had strange, beautiful flowers growing out of them, like orchids back home. But they weren’t like any orchids he had seen. They were huge, each petal was larger than his hand if his fingers were spread. And the petals had different colors, making each flower multi-colored, red, white, and either orange or blue.

The ground was wet, but there seemed to be enough solid matter under it, that there was no danger of sinking. He thought maybe they had been wrong, and might have been able to land the Jupiter somewhere over here on this side of the canyon.

“Not the first mistake I ever made,” he said aloud, thinking of SAR stabbing him in the heart when he thought he could somehow connect to the robot, or at least reason with him.

Hopefully, that would be the worst mistake he ever made. It was certainly almost his last. He could still feel the pain when SAR had stabbed him. That’s something he hadn’t said anything about to his family. He was lucky to be alive, so he sure wasn’t going to complain about the pain he felt for the few seconds before passing out. But he couldn’t forget it. And the one thing he remembered most was how cold the blade was when it went inside him. He shook his head, trying to push the memory away.

As they walked, Will thought it was strange that with all the plant life here on this planet, he couldn’t figure out why there was no animal life at all. No birds, no insects, nothing. Which made it almost completely quiet, unless a gust of wind blew through the trees.

By mid afternoon, they were almost out of the swamp. They stopped and Will drank some water, then took his monocular out again, and looked out at the red hills. They were about four kilometers away now. From here he could tell the red color was something growing on the hills now, not the color of the hills themselves.

“Flora of some kind I think, Robot,” he said. “We’ll be there in an hour or so. If you don’t detect any danger, maybe we’ll take some of it back with us and see what it is.”

Robot didn’t respond and they kept walking. They were about a kilometer away from the first hill when they stopped and Will pulled the monocular out again. He peered through it and said, “Yeah, it’s organic, whatever is covering those hills.”

He panned from one side to the other, trying to see movement of any kind, but it was still. They walked on. Half a kilometer away, Will took the monocular out and looked again. He could see there was something else on the hills. He had an uneasy feeling, adjusted the view on the monocular, and looked again.

He was worried for the first time. He took the monocular away from his eye, and looked up at Robot. “Now I know why we haven’t seen any animals,” he said. But he was here to explore. He quickly took his video camera off his belt, and swept across the red hills, and what he saw lying all around them.

“This is Will Robinson of the First…” but there was a shadow across the ground and he started to look up to see what had caused it.

“Danger, Will Robinson.”

Will forgot about the shadow, looked at Robot, said, “My feelings exactly. Let me get this, then we’ll turn back.”

He pointed the camera at the hills again, but he finally heard something besides the wind. It was under his feet. Like the ground was crackling. He looked down and saw movement. The mud he had been walking through for the last four hours was churning. “Robot! What’s going on?”

Robot looked straight at him. “Danger.” He immediately changed from his humanoid shape, to his natural form. Four arms, bright red face shield, the metallic spine protruding from his back.  

They began backing up. But they saw what had caused the movement in the mud. The red matter begin to grow up all around them. Like plants sprouting out of the soil, though their growth rate was almost instantaneous. “Let’s go Robot!” Will said and turned to run. But for as far as he could see behind them, extending all the way back through the swamp, the ground appeared to be blood red. The plants had surrounded them. Though he could tell now they were vines.

Will felt something and looked down. One of the vines had encircled his ankle. Without thinking he reached down to pull it off him, said, “Ouch!” He pulled his hand back. The plant had stung him. Now both ankles were wrapped and he tried to pull a foot free, but he couldn’t move it.

“Robot!”

The plants were encircling his friend too, but Robot was reaching down and stripping them off his legs. He could feel no pain, and was strong enough to pull them free, but as soon as he did, others took their place. He turned and looked at Will, seeing the plants wrap around the boy and start to climb his legs.

“Robot!” Will shouted again.

Robot, not worrying about himself, began firing over and over again all around Will. The red vines began falling off him, but there were too many, and continued to crawl up his legs. Will couldn’t even see his feet now, they were encased in the red vines.

“Help Robot!” His panicked voice hurt his friend, and he wanted to come to Will’s aid, but the vines had crawled up his leg and were circling his arms. He tore at them, burned them, lifted his legs and kicked them off, but there were too many and they began to wrap him close and pin his four arms to his sides. 

Will was covered in the vines now from his feet to his head. His nose was left uncovered, and he could still see a little through the vines that wrapped his face, but his mouth was covered and there was no way to call for his friend, and he was pretty sure Robot was unable to help him.

Finally he fell, and once on the ground, he began to move. The vines were pulling him back toward the hills. He was trying to fight and scream, but he was helpless to do anything except try to see Robot. Occasionally, he caught a glimpse of his friend. Robot was being pulled as well, several meters from him. Will couldn’t see him very well, but he could get glimpses of him. And he was as covered in vines as Will was, except his entire head was engulfed.

Will realized these plants must have some type of intelligence. They kept his airwaves open by not covering his nose, but Robot, who had no need to breath, was completely buried in them.

Then Will was being pulled past what he had seen in the monocular. Skeletons. Dozens of them, lying amongst the red plants that led to the hills. There were some animals but most of them looked human, though Will couldn’t tell. It was like a graveyard. Will wondered if his skeleton was going to end up being here as well.

The vines had continued to pull him along until he was among the red covered hills. He could no longer see Robot, and he was so scared, he didn’t think he would be able to call out to him if he was able.

He was no longer being pulled along the ground now. Instead, he felt himself sinking. And he knew these vines were pulling him under the surface. “No!” he tried to scream, but he could make no sound. He felt his legs go under, then his upper body. “No!” He tried again, but still couldn’t make a noise.

His body had stopped sinking, but only his head was above the surface. He could breath, as his nose was still clear. He could see a little still, but he couldn’t figure out what was happening. Then he felt the pain. It was coming from everywhere at the same time. It was the vines. They were pricking his skin everywhere they touched. And suddenly he knew what was happening. They were feeding off him. The red color was blood. They would hold him here, kept alive until there was no blood left in him, then spit his skeleton out and he would be a part of the graveyard, like the other skeletons that had been trapped in the swamp.

“I hope it’s fast,” he thought. But something told him it wouldn’t be. He would be kept alive as long as possible, until the vines sucked every last drop of blood from his body. Finally he passed out.

Chapter Text

Christmas Day

“You gonna cry, Will?”

“No.”

“Yes he is, he’s gonna cry.”

“I’m not gonna cry.”

“Then jump.”

“No.”

“You’re scared aren’t you?”

“No. I’m just not gonna jump.”

“No, you’re gonna cry.”

“No I’m not.” But now Will thought he might. Not because he was scared, but because they were just all so mean. And he didn’t know why.

He hadn’t done anything to them. He never did anything to anyone. As a matter of fact, he wanted to be their friend, that’s how he got here in the first place. The Robinsons had moved into this neighborhood in June, just after school was out. And Will had tried to make friends with just about everyone he met on the block, but none of them seemed to want to have anything to do with him. Until this morning.

He was riding his bike by himself. He promised his mom he wouldn’t leave the street. Normally, Penny would be with him, but like usual, she had made friends quickly and had gone to a pool party. Of course he wanted to go, but it was girls only.

Penny had told him she would ask if they would let him come, but he told her no, he didn’t want to go hang out with a bunch of girls. Of course he would have loved to go, but he knew Penny was just being nice. She was almost always nice to him, and they seldom had the fights siblings normally had, but even at eight years of age, Will knew Penny wanted to do things with her friends sometimes without him tagging along. So he acted like going to the pool party was the last thing in the world he would want to do, and he spent that morning by himself. Until he rode by the house on the corner.

Morgans. That was the name of the people who lived there. There were two boys, Gary who was eleven, and an older brother who was Judy’s age, fourteen. His name was Allen. And for some reason Allen was just mean. To everyone, as far as Will could tell. To the other kids in the neighborhood, and to his own brother. Allen was big for his age, and liked to show it.

But that morning when Will rode by, the two brothers were sitting on the porch with two other kids. Will didn’t know who they were, but he had seen them around the neighborhood. They seemed okay, though he had never really talked to them.

“Hey, come here,” Allen said when he rode by.

Will turned his bicycle around and stopped on the sidewalk in front of the boy’s house.

“You’re Will Robinson, right?” The older boy asked.

“Yes,” he replied.

“Your sister’s hot,” he said.

“Which one?” Will asked.

“The older one, dumb ass,” Allen replied.

“Both of them,” one of the other boy’s said.

“Um…thanks?” Will said.

Now the other kids laughed. But Allen didn’t seem to appreciate it. Will figured that was because it seemed like they were laughing at him, and not at Will.

“Want to see something cool?” Allen said.

“What is it?” Will asked.

“It’s in the backyard. Come on.”

Will sat on his bike, not sure.

“Don’t be a pussy,” Allen said. “My dad said your old man is a Navy SEAL, is that true?”

“Yes,” Will answered.

“He wouldn’t be very proud of you if he thought you were a pussy.”

“I’m not a p…I’m not scared.”

“Then come on.” The boy got up off the porch and the others followed him. Will stood where he was for a few seconds, then climbed off his bike and followed them past the house to the back yard.

There was a garage, and below it there was a mattress. “Our mom told us to carry this back to the alley for them to take to the dump,” Allen said. “We’ve been wrestling on it. But this is more fun.” He walked over to the garage where Will saw there was a ladder going up the side.

The boy climbed the ladder, while the other kids gathered around the mattress. Allen walked over the peak of the garage roof, then down the other side where he stood above the mattress. “Watch,” he said. He leaped off, kicked his feet out, and landed flat on his back on the mattress.

Now the other kids took turns climbing up to the roof, and jumping off one by one, like Allen had. Then they all looked at Will.

“Well?” Gary said.

Will looked up to the garage roof. It really wasn’t a far drop from the roof to the mattress, but these kids were all older than he was, by at least two years. But there weren’t many kids his age in the neighborhood, and he wanted them to like him. So he finally climbed to the roof. But now as he stood looking down at the mattress he had second thoughts.

“Jump!” Allen yelled. The other kids started yelling for him to jump.

Will stood looking down. He crouched, ready to leap, but he was having a hard time making himself.

“Come on, Pussy!” Allen yelled. Then they all began calling him names.

Finally, he leaped off, kicked his feet out to land on his back as the others had done, but he was scared and put a hand out to brace himself for the landing. They all heard the snap.

Will looked at his wrist. His arm was straight from his elbow halfway down to his wrist, but then it bent up and back straight, making an L shape in his forearm. He didn’t cry, though the pain was terrible. He just couldn’t believe the way his arm looked.

The other kids stood staring at him, all of them seemingly in shock at the way his arm looked as well. “Oh shit,” one of them said.

But Will just laid on his back, looking at his arm.

“Will? Will!”

He looked up to see Judy running toward him. She knelt down beside him. “Oh Will, come on, let’s get you home.” She helped him up with her hand on his back and the other on his good arm.

“It’s not our fault,” Allen said.

At first, it was like Judy was so worried about Will and so shocked at the way his arm looked, she hadn’t even noticed the other kids. But now she turned to them and Will could see the fury in her eyes.

“What’s wrong with you, Allen? Are you eight years old? Do you have any friends your own age, or do you like hanging out with kids you can push around?”

The boy didn’t answer, he just stood looking back at her, surprised at how she talked to him. He wasn’t used to it.

“Come on, Will.” She put her hand on his back and turned him away from the boys to take him home.

Before she could take a step, Allen said, “What the fuck, Will? You’re gonna have to learn to land.”

Judy turned around and punched him in the nose so hard it immediately spurted blood and he stumbled back two steps before catching himself or he would have been knocked down. The other kids, who had started to laugh at Allen’s joke, now stood in stunned silence.

“What the fuck, Allen? You’re gonna have to learn to duck,” Judy said. She glared at all four boys, as if she was hoping for one of them to say something else. Allen was standing with his hands over his nose, blood running through his fingers and down his chin. He didn’t move forward, content to keep his distance from Judy. And he didn’t say another word. Neither did the other boys.

“Let’s go honey,” Judy said and led Will away.

When they were on the sidewalk Will said, “It hurts, Judy,” his voice shaky as they walked toward home. “I think it needs ice.”

“Yeah. Looks like it,” she said. Though she knew it needed a cast, and most likely surgery by the way the wrist was bent. “Mom’s home, we’ll have her take a look at it.”

“How did you know I was here?” Will asked, his voice still shaky.

“I saw your bike on my way back from running. I’ll go back and get it as soon as I have you home. They won’t touch it. You know Will, I would have cried my eyes out at your age if this had happened to me. You’re so brave.”

He smiled. He didn’t want to tell her how close he was to crying. And he knew she was lying. She was the toughest person he knew, outside his dad. There was no way she would have cried.

Will opened his eyes and was looking back toward the swamp, where the red vines stretched as far as he could see. He realized he hadn’t been dreaming of that day, he was remembering it. But he had been slipping in and out of consciousness, so he hadn’t been sure at first.

He loved his sister so much, and missed her terribly. He thought Robot was sending him another memory, but then he decided he was just remembering it because he was dying and this is what they said happened. Though it didn’t seem like his life was flashing past his eyes, just this memory of his sister. Then he had another thought of her. She was looking up at him from the Jupiter 2, when it was in the water and she couldn’t make it through the hatch. He thought of the quick smile of reassurance she had given him.

And though he had no idea what day it was, he said, “I love you, Judy. Merry Christmas.”

Then he tried to move his limbs, but couldn’t. It seemed like he could feel every place these vines connected to his body. It wasn’t really pain he felt, like in the beginning, more a connection to it all, and a slow draining of him. And not just his blood, but everything about him was being drained. He felt so weak, that even if he was freed from these vines, he wouldn’t be able to stand, let alone walk back to the Chariot. It was as if he was becoming an empty shell as each hour passed.
‘

He knew he was dying, and if he remained conscious, he would lie here and think about that until his brain could no longer function. And he had no idea how long that would be. It was a horrible way to die. He used to think dying in a plane crash would be the worst. Knowing it was going to happen before his time, and yet helpless to do anything about it.

This was much worse than that, especially since he had no idea how long it would take.

He decided he needed to put his mind somewhere else. And not on his family. There was nothing comforting about that, it just made him miss them more, and feel bad for them, because they would never know what happened to him. He decided to think about the science of it all.

He averted his eyes, trying to look around him. He couldn’t see much past his direct line of site, as his head was connected to the vines as well, pinning it in place, so he couldn’t see anything around him past his peripheral vision. He tried desperately to search for Robot, but he couldn’t see him any more than he could sense him.

He looked closely at the vines that were connected to his chest. He could tell now the red color really was the blood in them, not the true color of the vines. It seemed they might even be colorless. He knew blood was red because of the hemoglobin transporting oxygen through the body. And he knew blood transported oxygen and nutrients to the body, while carrying carbon dioxide and other waste to the lungs and digestive system to be removed. So the vines were transporting his blood somewhere. But plants were different. They didn’t need blood, because plants didn’t have brains or muscles and didn’t move, so their oxygen needs were much less than animals.

Will understood that it was an alien environment on an alien world, and that things could be much different here. But he also thought that so far, everything they had seen since leaving Earth was consistent with the building blocks of nature and life. The Universe was vast and different, yet so similar.

And then it dawned on him. These aren’t vines. They’re veins. And while they might not work like human veins, he felt they fulfilled the same function, more or less. And whatever this thing was, blood was its food source. Like a leech.

And he felt his earlier deduction had been correct, that whatever this was had some type of intelligence. It knew he needed to be able to breathe, and so it didn’t cover his nose, and Robot’s head had been completely covered. But was it one organism that was just incredibly large, or did these vines…veins, belong to many individual organisms? That made the most sense, considering the vast area that they covered.

Then he had the idea he might be able to communicate with it like he was able to communicate with Robot. He concentrated, and thought I am friendly. I mean you no harm. He thought this over and over again, until it seemed almost amusing to him. Take me to your leader, he thought. He started laughing, and though he could make no sound, his body began to rock slightly, it was so funny to him.

And then he was laughing so hard he couldn’t stop himself. I mean you no harm. I come in peace. Take me to your leader take me to your leader take me to your leader, ran through his mind over and over again, and he kept laughing until it seemed almost maniacal, and then turned to tears, until he was sobbing.

After what seemed a very long time to him, Will finally began to control his crying. His eyes had been closed as he tried to communicate with whatever this thing was that held him. He knew he was slowly dying, but it had almost come to an end, and he had very little time left to live. He knew he would never see his family again.

He so much wanted to see them, especially his sisters. He wanted to tell Penny she was every bit as strong and independent as Judy, and what she had done with the engine and connecting to Sally was incredibly brave. He wanted to tell her, even though he couldn’t be with her any longer, he would always be with her. And that he loved her more than he could ever truly express.

He wanted to thank Judy for being more than a sister to him his entire life. For being a mother, a father, his friend and confident. The one person in his life he always counted on. The one person who knew everything about him, and who would always take care of him, even more than his parents. He wanted her to know that he didn’t take that for granted, and that he had been the luckiest boy in the world to have a big sister like her. He wanted to tell her she had always been his hero. Then he was crying again.

I’m finally going crazy, he decided, as he slowly began to control himself, and the sobbing stopped. And then the thought entered his tortured mind: After everything I have been through, could there be a worse way to die? And in that instant, he wished so much that SAR had finished the job.

He would never get to talk to his family again, to tell his sisters the things he had wished he had told them before he left. He realized his eyes had been closed as he had tried to communicate with this thing that held him, and he thought maybe he could at least get a glimpse of Robot. In whatever condition his best friend was in, he felt it would be comforting in his final moments. A connection to those he loved.

He opened his eyes, but he was no longer in the vines. He was in the tree, back where this all started. It had to be a dream, though it didn’t feel like a dream. It felt real. But it was different somehow. He saw Robot damaged, the upper half of his body perched on the end of the limb, his face shield red, but beginning to fade.

He scooted out to the end, just out of reach of Robot’s claws, said, “No point in you dying too.” He began to cut the limb, then watched as it broke and Robot’s upper half fell to the ground. Will scooted back until he was leaning against the tree trunk, and watched from above as the wires began to emerge from the two halves of Robot’s dying body, and he began to repair himself.

Once he was whole, Robot stood, looked up at Will, paused, as if thinking of something, then turned his back and walked away. Will watched him disappear in the burning forest. When Robot was gone, Will looked up at the sky again, tried one more time to call his father, and when there was no response, he leaned his back against the tree trunk, closed his eyes, and waited.

He felt the fire getting closer, and he was sweating and the heat was almost unbearable, but he wasn’t crying. He had already accepted his fate. As the smoke curled up around him, he began to cough, and then laid down on the branch. At eleven, his body was just small enough, and the branch was just wide enough for him to curl into a fetal position, pressed against the huge trunk of the tree, as if somehow it could comfort him. He closed his eyes and hoped the smoke inhalation would kill him before the fire could reach him.

Then everything changed. He was no longer in the tree, he was in the cafeteria with Penny, while Scarecrow searched for them. They were both under the table, Penny’s arms around him, her hands over his mouth to keep him from making a sound. He knew what was going to happen. He father’s singing would draw Scarecrow away, and they would escape. But that was not what happened. The damaged robot ripped the table away, and Penny stood and faced Scarecrow, still trying to protect her little brother.

But the robot just tossed her aside, and as Will sat on the floor, immobilized with fear, Scarecrow struck with all three prongs of his undamaged hand. Will felt one of the sharp fingers pierce his throat, while another struck his chest high, and the other glanced off his face, tearing a gash in his cheek. Will screamed and fell back, and looked up at Scarecrow’s angry red face shield as the life drained from his body.

The visions ended, and Will was staring out toward the swamp once again, where the vines covered everything he could see. He assumed this was just a series of dreams, or hallucinations, that his dying brain was imagining.

And then he was drifting away into space, watching the Jupiter 2 getting further and further away. He looked to his right, for his father who would be attached to the ship by the line on the harpoon that Dr. Smith had fired to him. But his father wasn’t there. He saw the harpoon, as it was being pulled back toward the ship, and he knew his father would never be able to save him. He was already too far away to be reached, even if the harpoon was fired again.

Will knew he was dreaming again, but he was aware. He knew he was trapped by something on this planet, but he was experiencing floating away in space at the same time. And while he had always heard dreams really only lasted a few minutes, he was certain this didn’t. He would have had about six hours of oxygen left in his suit, and he lived every one of those hours, thinking about his family until he began to struggle for breath towards the end.  And as he finally began to lose consciousness, he realized there were a lot of bad ways to die. Maybe that’s what this creature was trying to tell him.

Finally it was over. 

Chapter Text

The Robinsons and the Dhars were gathered around the dining room table. Grant was going to go over that evening for dinner, and Don had been there, but there was a problem with the Resolute and he volunteered to go check it out since it was Christmas. The tree was in the corner, lights were shining brightly, and though it was almost eleven AM, the presents were still wrapped.

“Nothing like Christmas on the Water Planet,” Judy said. “Who would have thought we would have a better Christmas on that planet than our first one on Alpha Centauri?”

“Maureen, we need a plan,” John said.

“Don’t you think I’ve been trying to come up with something?” She asked, sharply. “We have no way of knowing where they started, or where they went.”

“He didn’t give you any indication?” Victor asked. The Dhars had come over with Vijay when he told them Will was not back.

“The only thing he said was they would not leave the galaxy, and they would be back by Christmas,” Maureen answered.

“Did any of the robots know where they might go?” Prisha asked.

“No, I don’t think so,” Maureen said. “The robots know a lot, especially about technology, but in many ways, they are just growing up too. I don’t think they know much about the universe on any planet they aren’t familiar with.”

“I think that was part of the intrigue,” Judy said. “The two of them discovering things together.”

“Well, you know Will a lot more than I do,” Victor responded. “But the boy I know didn’t seem to do much by the seat of his pants. He seemed to think everything through before making a decision. And it usually seemed to be the correct decision.”

“Up until a robot stabbed him in the heart,” Penny said. She hadn’t said anything at all before that. She wasn’t even sitting at the table with them. She was on the couch in the adjacent living room, staring at the Christmas tree. But now they knew she was listening. And they could tell by her voice she was not happy. She seemed bitter. Maureen knew she was just missing her brother and was worried about him.

“I didn’t say he always made the right decision,” Victor said.

“Yeah,” Vijay said. “But when we were separated, he seemed so mature. Thirteen, and doing everything he could to find a way to get us off the planet.” He looked at Judy. “They probably didn’t say much to you guys, because you were his sisters. But the other kids were either afraid of him, or they sort of worshiped him. They just didn’t approach him.”

“Just like when he was in school back home,” Penny said. “Like no one ever just let him be a child. No one.” She looked at her mom when she said this. Now Maureen knew there was more going on with Penny than the fact she was worried about her brother.

And there was. Penny had been staring at the Christmas tree, trying everything she could to tune the rest of the family out, while thinking of Christmases back on Earth, with her little brother. She hadn’t slept at all the night before, and at four AM had walked into the kitchen, made coffee, and sat in front of the tree and thought about him. She had decided she was going to spend Christmas with Will, even if he wasn’t there.

Some of her fondest memories of her brother were of Christmas mornings. When he was really little, he always slept in her bed on Christmas Eve. While she was older, she was still a child, and was always excited. But Will’s enthusiasm just made it all the better, and they would lie side by side, talking and laughing until they couldn’t stand it anymore, and would sneak up to sit in front of the tree and try to guess what was in the packages. Their parents had a rule that they could not wake them up until five AM, so they would wait patiently, looking at the clock every few minutes. Judy would usually stumble in before five, and complain about the time because she was a teenager and was supposed to. But they knew she was just as excited as they were.

Finally, at five, Judy and Penny would knock on their parent’s door, one of them carrying coffee. It was already made. When he was six years old, Will had watched a video on line and learned how to do it himself so he could have it ready for his parents, and would make it twenty minutes or so before it was time to wake them. Though, Penny or Judy were always close by and watching him until he was old enough they didn’t worry about it.

Somehow, it had become Will’s job to hand out the gifts, and he would find a spot by the Christmas tree while the girls went to wake their parents. Penny smiled, as she sat looking at the tree, thinking of Will, excitedly picking out packages. He had a system from the very beginning. Everyone got a turn, and he would only hand a package out to the next person once they had all watched their family member open the gift he had just given them.

Penny remembered the first time he had done this. He couldn’t have been more than four years old, and she said, “Will! This is going to take forever!”

But he just looked at her and said, “So? It’s Christmas, Penny."

She smiled at the memory. It was like Will knew how important those moments were with the family at that age, more than the rest of them did. She felt it was probably because their father missed a lot of important events, and if he was there for Christmas, Will wanted to enjoy every minute of it. Family was always the most important thing to him.

So why did he leave now? They were finally all together on Alpha Centauri. It had taken them three years to get there, and they had risked their lives so many times. Especially Will. Of course he wanted to explore the universe. He was still a boy, and after all that had happened to him, she knew it had to have excited the adventurous side of him. But she did feel like he had a specific reason for leaving. She just hoped it was because he was looking for something in particular, and not that the year they had been separated from their parents—and really from each other—had caused him to lose that connection that he had always felt to the family. Like maybe it wasn’t as important as it used to be.

“But the thing was, he knew exactly what he was doing,” Vijay said, pulling Penny away from her thoughts. “About the titanium. About confronting SAR. About everything,” Vijay added.

“Yeah,” Judy agreed. “Even if the decision was a bad one, Will didn’t just jump into it without thinking it through. He never really did anything like that. I remember when he was taking Robot to hide him in the cave. I mean, we were on a planet with a huge forest, and he could have taken him anywhere. But he found the cave, mapped it, knew exactly what he wanted to do to hide him, and was going to do it on his own, if we hadn’t caught him. But he didn’t just head off in the woods with him.”

“That’s what I mean,” Victor said. “It just doesn’t seem like Will to take off somewhere without some idea of where he was going.”

Penny thought about her brother’s system for handing out the gifts. They were right. Will always thought everything through before doing it. But she was in no mood to take part in this discussion. She stood up and walked toward the door.

“Where are you going, honey?” Maureen asked.

“Out.”

“It’s Christmas,” John said.

She spun around. “This is not Christmas. Not any Christmas like the ones I remember.” She turned again.

“Hold on, I’ll go with you,” Vijay said.

“No! Um…no, I’m sorry, Vijay. I really want to be by myself right now.” She started to turn and walk out again.

“Penny, I know you’re upset about Will being gone,” Maureen said. “We all are. But I think…”

Penny spun back around. “Of course I’m upset about Will being gone. Of course we all are. But I’m so pissed right now, I just can’t sit here and listen to this…this bullshit. Doesn’t anyone think these are conversations we should have had before he left?”

“We talked to him,” John said.

“But did you ask him why?” Penny said. “Why it was so important that he leave now? Did you tell him it just doesn’t sound like him to go off without any plan or idea of where he was going and what he wanted to do? He’s gone because you let him go! He’s fourteen years old, he went through open heart surgery a couple months ago. He had an artificial heart put in. He had an army of robots that wanted to kill him. One of them stabbed him in the fucking heart. And you…you…you…just let him go back to space? What kind of parenting is that? This is your fault! Yours and Dad’s. And if anything has happened to him, I will never, ever forgive you!”

With that she turned and walked out. The rest of them sat in silence, not knowing what to say. Then they heard something outside, and Penny made a noise. She didn’t scream, it was more like a surprised gasp. The door hadn’t completely closed, and they saw her standing there, her body rigid. John had recognized the sound, and was already out of his chair and running to the door when they heard it again, and Penny fell backwards into the living room, where John arrived just in time to catch her and lower her to the floor.

Penny was staring up at her father, a surprised look on her face. There was a bloody hole in her chest. “He shot me,” she said, and passed out.

Then the rest of the family was there, Judy trying to get past the others to tend to her, but John yelled, “Get back!” And dragged Penny inside and Victor slammed the door behind them.

Judy leaned over Penny as they all gathered around. “Put pressure on the wound! Don’t press too hard!” She yelled, as she stood up and ran to her room to get her medical emergency bag. Maureen covered the bullet hole with her hands.

“We have to get her to the hospital!” Judy called as she rushed back into the room and kneeled by her unconscious sister, opened her bag and took out a sealed bandage. She ripped it open, moved Maureen’s hands, then pressed it over the wound and sealed it. “That’ll help for now but we have to get her to the hospital. With a chest wound she could have all sorts of internal injuries.”

John rose up and pushed the door open, and a shot just missed him. He ducked back down and slammed the door. “Victor, look through the window in the kitchen! He’s in the woods across the road, I have to try and get behind him. I’ll call you if I think it’s safe, then get them to the Chariot!”

“I’ve got them John, be careful!”

John ran back to the bedroom, took a handgun from a hidden panel in the wall next to his side of the bed. He knew Maureen wouldn’t approve, but after what they had all gone through, he wasn’t willing to risk not having a weapon nearby.

He ran out the back door, circled around the house, stood for a few seconds looking into the trees, then called Victor on the radio. “Make sure they aren’t near the door, then push it open slightly. I need to see where he is. But don’t show yourself.”

“Got it, John,” Victor replied.

Victor ran back to where they were gathered around Penny. “We have to move her behind the wall, I need to push the door open.”

“Okay, gently,” Judy said.

“Penny, we’re moving you,” Maureen said. She didn’t know if her daughter could hear her or not.

They dragged her a couple feet, Maureen, Vijay and Prisha gently pulling her, while Judy crawled on her knees, beside Penny. As soon as they were out of the way, Victor pushed the door open, while staying out of sight. A shot immediately hit the wall beside him.

Outside, John saw where the shot came from, and he opened fire with three quick bursts, then ran across the lawn toward the woods, trying to stay behind trees. His gun was raised and pointed to the tree he was pretty sure the shooter was hiding behind.

Inside, Prisha said, “That’s a different gun! There’s more than one of them. He’s outnumbered.”

“That’s John’s gun,” Maureen said. “The one he thinks I don’t know he has. And believe me when I say whoever just shot his daughter is the one who’s outnumbered.” She was looking down at Penny’s pale face, trying to hold back tears, but furious at whoever did this, and hoping John found him.

“We have to get her out of here,” Judy said. “I can’t do much for her here and her pulse is weak. We’re running out of time.”

Victor called John’s radio. “We have to go, John. Judy said we’re running out of time.”

John had stopped behind a tree in their yard, next to the road. “Push the door open again.”

This time when Victor pushed it, there was no shot.

“Okay, Victor. Pick her up and get ready. When you hear my gun fire, get to the Chariot.”

Victor dropped down and slid his arms under Penny, while the others began to lift her slightly.

Prisha hurried to the door and put her hand on the knob. “I’ll go first,” she said.

“No, you won’t, Mom,” Vijay said, stepping in front of her.

“No Vijay…”

“I’m not a child,” he said, his voice cracking.

Judy looked at him. She thought it was fear that was causing his voice to tremble, but when she saw his face, she realized it was rage. Vijay was growing up too, she thought.

“Judy!” John called on his radio.

“Dad, we’re going right now,” Judy called back.

“Go!” John said. He opened fire toward the woods, and sprinted to the spot where the gun shot had come from.

Vijay threw the door open and ran toward the Chariot, while Victor carried Penny, and the others kept pace with him. Vijay threw the rear door opened, and held it while staring into the woods. Prisha jumped in the driver’s seat, as Victor slid Penny in, with Judy crouching on the floorboard. Then Vijay and Maureen crawled in, Maureen kneeling on the floorboards in front of Penny.

Victor left them, and ran toward the woods where John had disappeared.

“He’s unarmed,” Prisha said under her breath.

“Yeah, I guess the Robinsons kind of rub off on you,” Vijay said. He had moved to the far side, next to Penny’s head, and was brushing the hair back out of her eyes.

“Not sure that’s a good thing,” Maureen said, looking at her daughter’s pale face.

As Prisha backed the Chariot out, John had stepped out of the trees, but stood by the edge of the woods, keeping his gun raised and watching carefully. He motioned them past, and the Chariot sped down the road. Victor ran up to meet him. “See him, John?” He asked.

“No. I think he fired the last shot to keep us back, then took off in the woods. I’ll wait here and keep a look out while you get the other Chariot, pull it up and I’ll jump in.”

“Will do, John.”

Victor ran to the Dhar’s Chariot, started it, and drove up next to John, reached over and opened the passenger’s side door.

John backed away from the trees, keeping his gun pointed at them, until he could slide in, and the Chariot sped off.

“How is she?” John called Maureen on the radio.

“We don’t know, John. Did you see anyone?”

“No. Tracks were there. I think only one person. But he was gone. If I find out who…”

“I know who,” he heard Vijay call out.

“It was Liam, Dad,” Judy said.

“Liam? That kid she liked?”

“Yes,” Vijay said. “She thinks he’s been stalking her.”

Victor called Alpha Security and reported the attack, and told them who they thought did it. He looked at John. “They’ll go pick him up.”

“He better hope they find him before I do,” John said.

“Call Don, Dad,” Judy said over the radio. “He’s family too, he needs to know. And Grant.”

John pressed Grant’s call number and told him what happened. Grant said he would head to the hospital. Then John called Don’s number and told him.

“Is she going to be okay?” John could hear the concern in Don’s voice.

“We don’t know, we’re on the way to the hospital.”

“Okay, I just left Alpha, I’ll head there.”

John looked at Victor. “Thanks for being there today, Victor. My family really needed you.”

“We’re your family too, John,” Victor said.

John looked at him and smiled, thinking how far they had come since the two families had met. Then he looked out the window, thinking that one child was missing and one had just been shot. “We came here to be safe,” he said.

Victor looked at him, but there was nothing to say.

Yeah, I’ll head to the hospital, Don thought. But not yet. He knew where Liam’s family lived, and he was only a few blocks away.

Don pulled up at Liam’s house, and just as he did, a Chariot pulled in behind him. Don jumped out and turned to see who was in the vehicle. It was Liam.

The boy stepped out and smiled, “Merry Christmas, Don.” Don Jumped him.

He shoved Liam back against his Chariot with his hands gripping his collar.

“What the fuck?” Liam said.

“Hey! What’s going on?”

Don glanced at the front door where Liam’s father was coming out, followed by his mother.

Liam took the opportunity to shove Don back, then he ran.

Don immediately gave chase. The boy was fast. He ran across the street and between two houses. Don was in pursuit, but realized the kid was going to outrun him. When he saw Liam run across a yard, Don ran through the hedge and saw the house next door had been badly damaged in the robot battle. He ran through a huge hole in the wall and out the other side where that wall was completely gone. Now he had an angle on Liam, who thought the man was still behind him. As he looked back to see if he was putting distance between them, Don tackled him into the street.

The boy put up his hands but Don hit him once in the face, and Liam cried out, and covered his head with his forearms. Don hit him with a hook in the jaw to get around the arms, and when the kid yelled out and moved to cover the side of his head, Don started to hit him in the mouth, but someone grabbed his arm and began pulling him off. Don, thinking it was Liam’s father, turned and punched him, and was immediately tackled to the ground by two Alpha Security officers.

“He’s fucking crazy!” Liam said, through his bloody mouth. His parents had just arrived and were trying to help their son up. “What the fuck, Don!” Liam said.

Security officers were coming from every direction. “He attacked my son!” Liam’s father said, pointing at Don, who now had his hands cuffed behind his back. “He’s crazy.”

But the security officers all surrounded Liam. Two of them pushed him to the ground on his stomach and his hands were secured, then they pulled him to his feet.

“Hey! What did I do?” The boy yelled.

“You know what you did you piece of shit!” Don said, and tried to get free to get to the boy again, but the security officers began leading him away.

“You’re under arrest for attempted murder,” one of the officers said. “And you better hope she lives.”

“Who? Who?” Liam said as they pushed him through the yard.

“Penny!” Don yelled back at him. “You fucking know.”

“What? No! I didn’t do anything,” the boy yelled as they led him to a security vehicle.

As they pushed him in the backseat, he looked up at his parents who were following the officers closely as they took their son away. “Find out if she’s okay!” Liam said, and the door shut.

Judy called in the emergency on the way, and they were ready and waiting outside with a stretcher cart when they pulled the Chariot up at the hospital. Two doctors rushed to the back, slid Penny out on the the cart, and they headed in the building.

Two of my three children have arrived here the exact same way, Maureen thought as they hurried through the doors. And we don’t even know where one of them is now. We thought Earth was dangerous.

“Merry fucking Christmas!” she said aloud. Judy and the Dhar’s turned and looked at her as they rushed through the door.

The stretcher was pushed down the hall toward the emergency OR. “Everyone needs to stay here,” The Doctor said. “We’ll let you know something as soon as we can.”

“Can I be in the room?” Judy asked. “I know I can’t scrub in.”

The doctor looked at her, said, “You know the rules. But I’ll let you go to the observation room. And no interference no matter what happens. And if I order you out, you go.”

“I understand,” Judy said. She turned and hugged her mom, said, “I’ll let you know as soon as I can.”

Maureen hugged her back and watched her daughter disappear through the doors.

Just before they pushed Penny into the OR, Judy walked up and took her by the hand. “You can do this, little sister. We’re all here.”

Penny opened her eyes. “Will’s dying, Judy,” she whispered. “Something has him. Something bad.” And just as suddenly, she was unconscious again, as they pushed her stretcher into the Operating Room.

Judy stood in the hall, her mouth open, as the door closed. She didn’t know what to do. She looked once back to the door leading to the hallway, thinking she needed to go tell her parents what her sister had said. But she realized that would only make everything worse for them. It certainly had for her. She pushed a door open and started up the stairs that would lead to the observation room, where she could watch them operate on her sister. She knew she was going to start crying, and she didn’t want to be around her family when she did.

Chapter Text

The Robinsons and Grant were all gathered in the waiting room with the Dhars. John had received a call from Alpha Security, telling him that Liam was in custody, and they were questioning him. He also found out they were holding Don until they investigated his attack on the boy. When John tried to argue with them, they just told him that Liam was innocent until proven guilty, and that Don had been arrested for aggravated assault. John had asked to speak to him but they said he was still being processed and questioned as well.

Now the family could do nothing but wait. After the medical staff had stabilized Penny and performed an Advanced CT Scan, they immediately began surgery. She had internal injuries and, while the scan was extremely accurate, they would not know how much damage had been done to her organs until they opened her up.

Maureen and John sat holding hands, while Judy sat next to them. The Dhars sat across from them. Vijay had gone from scared to concerned, and finally to anger. He sat by himself, arms folded across his chest, looking down at the floor, saying nothing to anyone. Victor and Prisha had tried to speak to him, but he had ignored most of what they said, with occasional one word answers.

Judy had watched the surgery when they began, but to her surprise, she found she wasn’t able to sit up in the observation room and see her sister on the operating table, surrounded by doctors and nurses, while she was unable to do anything about it. And as she sat there, she had begun to think about everything that had happened since she had come up with the idea to separate from the adults.

Yes, they had survived, but at what cost? Alpha had been attacked, and several people had lost their lives. And as for her brother and sister, nothing seemed better for them. Will was gone, perhaps forever, and Penny was fighting for her life. Who’s to say what would have happened if they had remained with their parents? So after awhile, she had gone back to the waiting room with the others, and told them she had no news, but she was sure Penny would be fine. She wasn’t sure.

For the last two hours she had been sitting next to her parents, waiting silently, looking down at the floor. Grant sat across from her, and when she got up and left the room, he followed her out.

He saw her walk down the hall and exit the building. When he was outside, he found her sitting on a bench, doubled over, arms wrapped around herself, crying.

He sat down beside her. He didn’t say anything. He just sat there quietly.

Finally Judy said, “This is all my fault.”

“No it isn’t, Judy,” he argued. “No one could have known he could do this. When I met the kid I knew he was cocky but he never seemed dangerous. Or crazy.”

“It isn’t true that no one knew. Someone did. The same person that always seems to know: Will. He warned me. He told me to watch out for Penny because he didn’t trust Liam. But I was too busy. I didn’t listen.”

“You were taking care of all the kids, Judy.”

“But I wasn’t taking care of the two kids that counted on me more than anyone. My brother and sister. Penny was just fucked up in the head. Missing Mom and Dad, blaming me. So she was rebelling. And Will…look what happened to him because I wasn’t paying attention to him. To either of them. Penny was right. He’s a child, and we all act like he isn’t. And Penny is too. She might be eighteen now, but she was seventeen when we were first stranded. Both of them were children, and everything that happened to them since we left that planet happened because I didn’t do my job with them. My job was to take care of them.”

“You took care of everyone, Judy. And you did a damn good job. None of those kids would have made it without you. I wouldn’t have made it without you, because you came and found me. And we all would have died on that ship trying to leave the planet because you were smarter than I was. I thought I could override the computer, and I would have gotten us all killed. But you stopped that as well.

“This thing with Liam, no one saw that coming. And blaming yourself is not going to fix it. I think your parents have done such an amazing job with you. With all of you. But you and Will, you have this thing. You both have to save the world. Probably from that Navy SEAL father of yours.”

“He reenlisted to go back to the war,” Judy said. “He could have stayed with us. I knew he did, because I heard him on the phone talking to his CO. No one knew that. I didn’t tell anyone. I think Mom found a letter, that’s how she found out. But I knew all along. I told myself I hated him because of it. I tried to hate him. I thought he left me for strangers. That’s what I told myself the whole time he was gone. His men were more important than me.

“And then, I did the same thing. I left Penny and Will to fend for themselves because of my responsibilities. And Will went to confront that robot all alone. I…I will never forget that night. We saw him falling and we didn’t know what happened. But we knew it was bad. And…I didn’t think he would survive. I couldn’t tell Mom and Dad, but I was just sure he was gone. And I knew if I had paid more attention to him when we were stranded, it would never have happened. I took care of my little brother since the time he came home from the hospital. Until he needed me the most. And then I wasn’t there for him.

“I did exactly what Dad did. And I did the same thing to Penny. Even after Will warned me about Liam. They both needed me and I wasn’t there.”

“You are John Robinson’s daughter in every way,” Grant said. “And there is both good and bad that comes with it. The bad is for the right reasons, but it’s still bad. For you. You Robinsons are a family unit that operates like a machine. But, Will and Penny learned they are individuals when they were stranded on that planet. You never had the time for that. And you need to try and find out who you are too. Just like they did. And sometimes you will make mistakes. But that’s part of growing up.”

She looked at him now. “Maybe this is who I am. The girl who takes care of her siblings. If so, is that so wrong? Would that mean I am giving up anything?”

“What if you fell in love with someone?”

“Then he better love Penny and Will too.”

Grant smiled. “And that’s the best part of being just like John Robinson. You know, Judy, I didn’t know your mother was pregnant when I left. But in all honesty, it wouldn’t have made any difference.”

Now she stopped looking at the ground and looked back at him.

“I hate to admit that, but it’s true,” he said. “My entire life was my career. And The Mission. Your mother gave it all up for you, but I wouldn’t have, I know. But John Robinson? He left for a few years because he thought he was doing the thing he had to do to make the world safe for his children. For every child. But when he thought he might never see you again—that he might actually really lose you—he gave it all up to be with you. That’s the influence you’ve had in your life. And I’ll never forget that John did that. That he was a better man than I was.

“And you are John Robinson. You took the responsibility that he gave you seriously, because you knew those children needed you. And that your father was counting on you. Can you imagine how that hurt him, to send you off alone? To be separated from you again? But he knew you could handle it. And he knew if he never saw you again, you would take care of Penny and Will. And you did. Just like you took care of all the other kids. John Robinson gave the best part of himself to you, Judy. His daughter.”

Vijay stuck his head out the door. “She’s out of surgery.”

They rushed back in the room, where a male and female doctor were standing with the family.

“She’s stable,” the woman was saying. “But she’s still critical. We won’t know for awhile yet if she will make a complete recovery, or if there will be some pending issues. It’s quite possible she will need more surgeries. She sustained quite a bit of tissue damage, and her pancreas was damaged. She might need a transplant. She could suffer from pancreatitis in the future, depending on how the injury heals. Sometimes in an injury like this, they will get a few bouts of acute pancreatitis, which can be dangerous, but can be treated. Sometimes they will suffer from chronic pancreatitis, which will take more management. But she’s lucky you were all there. Had she been brought in a few minutes later she may not have survived.”

“But she’s going to live?” John asked.

“Mr. Robinson, I’m not going to lie to you,” the Doctor said. “The next seventy two hours will be the most important. If she survives that, yes, I believe she’ll be fine, and we just have to watch for any of the things I told you about. Right now, I can’t promise you anything. But she’s strong. And she has a strong family.” The doctor looked around the room. “And a big family.”

As the doctors left the room, John received a call on his radio. He saw it was Don.

“Don, you okay?” John asked.

“Of course I’m okay, but how’s Penny?”

“She just got out of surgery. She’s stable. They don’t know yet, but in seventy two hours they’ll have a better idea. What did you do?”

“I was close to Liam’s house, and went there. He pulled up after me, so he was out when Penny was shot. When I confronted him he ran.”

“He’s obviously guilty,” John said.

“Obviously,” Don answered.

“Are they going to release you?” John asked.

“Not anytime soon. They’re gathering the facts, they say. Can’t take too long. I hit him three or four times while security was arriving. And I’m not denying it.”

Now Judy spoke up. “Don we’ll be there to see you as soon as we know how Penny’s doing.”

“No rush. Three hots, a cot and a pot for me. You stay with your family the next few days and see how Penny is. Maybe I’ll be out by then too.”

“Penny will be fine, Don,” Maureen said. “I’m certain. Thank you. Thank you for what you did. We won’t forget it.”

“Liam won’t either,” Don said. “And that’s what families are for.”

Judy was watching her father as he talked to Don. As soon as the call disconnected she walked over to him and wrapped her arms around him and hugged him. “Thank you, Dad.”

“For what?” He asked.

“For being my dad. For being Penny and Will’s dad. And I promise you, as long I’m alive I’ll take care of them. You never have to worry about them.”

“I know that, Judy. I’ve always known that. But thank you for telling me. And thank you for letting me be your dad.”

They stayed at the hospital overnight, only leaving to get coffee or food at the cafeteria or to go to the restroom.

On the third day, the doctor and nurse walked in again. “We have good news,” the Doctor said. “She’s going to make it.”

They all hugged each other, and Maureen said, “Can we see her?”

“I would like to give her until tomorrow. She is still sedated, and won’t know you’re there, anyway. I suggest you all go home and get some rest, and come back in the morning. She should be able to see you then.”

Will couldn’t move. That’s all Penny knew. She didn’t know why, and she didn’t know how long it had been going on, but she felt him slipping away every day. Like he was becoming smaller. But she thought that was just the way her mind was grasping it. He wasn’t becoming physically smaller, he was just becoming less of what he was. And she couldn’t figure out what that meant. It wasn’t what she would normally associate with death. But she knew it meant he would eventually cease to exist at all. And she didn’t know if that would be hours or days or weeks.

He didn’t seem scared to her. And, while she didn’t know this for certain, she felt it was just where he was now in his mind. That he had been terribly frightened before, when whatever it was that was happening to him had first started. But he was past that, and now was just sad. And lonely.

This was the worst part. She could almost sense his loneliness. She knew Robot wasn’t with him. And like all the rest, she didn’t know why. But she knew it. Wherever Will was, and whatever had happened to him, he was slowly become less of himself, and he was all alone. And she just wished she could be there with him, even if all she could do was ease his loneliness until the end.

For some reason, her mind wandered back to a day when Will was seven years old. The 1st Colonist Group to Alpha Centauri had left that morning, and their mother was already talking about the chances of them going some day. Penny was looking for her brother and found him in the back yard. It was evening, almost dark, and he was walking around, looking up in the sky.

“Whatcha looking for, Will?” She asked, walking out the back door.

“Lightening bugs.”

“Lightening bugs? When’s the last time you saw a lightening bug?”

“I don’t remember. It was at Grandma’s farm. I was pretty little. I don’t know, I was just thinking about them, wondering why we never see them anymore.”

“Um…because we have pretty much killed the planet?”

“Yeah I guess. That’s a shame isn’t it? We used to see them when we were little.”

“You are little, Will,” Penny joked. “But we never saw that many.”

“Yeah, but back East we did. Remember? They were everywhere that one night.”

“Yeah. In Indiana. When we went back where Grandma was from. I remember that.”

“It was so cool,” he said.

“Yeah.”

“So, I was thinking, if we can kill a whole planet, maybe we can bring it back somehow. I mean, we’re just packing up and leaving it, like we used it all up, and there’s nothing we can do about it. But if we’re smart enough to travel to a whole new planet, why aren’t we smart enough to fix the one we broke?”

“You’re worried about us going someday?” She asked.

He didn’t answer, he just kept looking up in the sky. She walked over and stood beside him and put a hand on his shoulder. “Mom just mentioned it Will, that doesn’t mean it will ever happen.”

He gave her a look. It was her look she realized. The one she saved for when she heard something she was skeptical about. She called it her bullshit speed bump look.

“Have you ever known Mom to give up on something she wants?” Will asked. “We’re going to space, Penny. It’s only a matter of time.”

“But if we do, we’ll be okay, you know?” She said.

“Um…nope. I don’t know. Neither do you.”

“Will, as long as we’re together, we’ll be okay. Like Judy always says, Robinsons stick together.”

“Yep,” he answered. “Written in stone.”

“Will, are you alright?” Penny asked, hearing the tone in his voice.

When he turned to her this time, she saw he was emotional. “Penny, if we’re going to be okay just because we’re together, why don’t we just stay here together? We’ll be okay here too. But at least we’ll know what the dangers are.”

“Will…” but she decided not to disagree with him. For one thing, you couldn’t argue with the logic. So instead she said, “So that’s why you’re looking for lightening bugs?”

“Yeah, Earth always goes through cycles, Penny. Everyone acts like we’ve destroyed it beyond repair. But I’m not sure we have. So I figure if I find just one, it means they’re coming back. And Earth has a chance. So I’ll tell Mom there’s no need to leave. We can stay here and figure out how to fix it.”

She smiled, watching her brother walk around the yard, looking up in the sky. He was so smart, and yet, such a little boy, still. Finally she started doing the same thing.

“What are you doing?” He asked.

“Helping you look. Robinsons stick together.”

He smiled at her and the two kids walked around the yard together, heads in the air, looking for the insects that were no longer there. Finally Penny put her hand on his neck and said, “It’s getting late, Will. We better go in.”

“Okay,” he said, and he let her guide him toward the door.

“You don’t seem too disappointed that we didn’t find any,” she said, as they walked.

“It’s just one night, Penny. I’m not giving up.”

And that was her brother. It didn’t matter that he was afraid of everything, he was still hopeful. He was always hopeful. And suddenly she realized why her mind had gone back to that day. Hope was one of the things that made Will, Will. And that was being taken from him by this thing that held him. Somehow she knew that.

She opened her eyes. At first she didn’t know what happened or where she was. But it all rushed back. She tried to cry out but wasn’t able to. She looked around the room. She was connected to tubes, and an IV, and monitors. Next to her hand, on the bed rail, was a control. She reached out, pressed a button. When there was no immediate response, she pressed it over and over again. Finally a nurse came running in the room.

“Penny! Are you okay?” The nurse hurried to her bedside and began checking the monitor and the IV.

“What day?” Penny whispered.

“I’m sorry honey, I didn’t hear you,” the nurse leaned close.

“What day?”

“Saturday,” the nurse said.

Penny didn’t know what that meant. She had lost track of the days. “What’s the…date?” She whispered.

“Oh, the thirtieth. December thirtieth.”

Penny’s eyes grew big. “Is my brother back?” She whispered.

“Your brother? Will?” Everyone knew Will.

“Yes.”

“No, I don’t think so. He hasn’t been here. The rest of your family is pretty much here all day.”

“Dad.”

“Yes, he’s been here.”

“I need my dad.”

“Oh, well he’ll be here first thing in the morning. We told him you should be able to see him…”

“Now.”

“Oh no, honey. It’s three thirty in the morning.”

“Now. I need my dad.”

“But you’re fine, you just need to rest.”

“I…need…my…father.”

She was still whispering, but her voice was a little louder.

“But first thing…

“I need my…father. I fucking need my father. I need him now!”

She was beginning to speak clearer and louder, but the nurse was worried there was something else wrong with her.

“Let me call the doctor, dear.”

“I need my fucking dad. I need him now! Now! I need him now!”

The nurse pressed her call button for assistance, just as Penny pulled her IV out and fluid began running down her arm. “I need him now!”

A doctor and two other nurses ran into the room. “We need to sedate her,” the doctor said as soon as he saw she was thrashing around.

Once Penny was sedated, they called the Robinsons, and told them Penny had gained consciousness, but there had been an incident and that she should be fine, but that they should come over first thing in the morning.

The Robinsons left immediately, and were taken to her room, so they could be there when she woke.

Penny thought she was dreaming, and that she was seeing shadows along the wall. But when she realized she was looking at her Dad and Judy sitting in chairs across the small room, she glanced to her left and saw her mother in a chair by the bed.

“We need to find Will,” She whispered.

They didn’t know she was awake, so when she spoke they all stood and rushed to the bed.

“How do you feel?” Maureen asked.

“Like someone shot me in the chest,” she whispered. “We need to find Will.”

“Don’t talk, Penny,” Judy said. “You need to just relax right now.”

“Penny, you need to worry about getting better,” John said.

“No. No.” They leaned close so they could hear her. “Don’t ask me not to worry…about my brother. You have to try and find him.”

“We haven’t been able to think about much except for you,” Maureen said. Which of course wasn’t true. They thought of Will constantly. But they could do nothing for him, and they had to be here for Penny.

“I lived,” She whispered. “He’s not going to.”

“Penny…” Maureen started to tell her she had to relax.

“He’s dying,” she whispered. “Don’t ask me how I know. But I do. It’s not even death. Worse. You…have to find him.”

“But we wouldn’t even know where to begin,” John said.

“Every problem has a solution,” Judy said. She had walked to the side of Penny’s bed, and was holding her hand.

“But Judy…” John started to argue.

“I didn’t listen to my brother and sister for a year. I’m listening now.” Judy was talking to her parents, but looking at her sister.

“Penny, we’re going to discuss what to do,” John said. “But right now, you need…”

“Dad, I love you.” She stopped. She had very little energy. “I love all of you. But…you can’t do anything for me. I’m here. But…we don’t know where Will is. But I know he’s dying. I am certain of it. You have to try…and find him.”

“But Penny, how would you know that?” Her mother asked. “And we need to make sure you’re going to be okay.”

“If…you want me to be okay, I need to know someone is trying…to find Will.”

“Okay, Penny,” John said. “I’ll call Victor, and we’ll meet tonight and try and put our heads together.”

“Vijay wants me to call him,” Judy said. “Do you feel like talking to him? It’s early, but I’m sure he wants to hear from you.”

“Later. Call him….and tell him I’m okay, and…I’ll call him later, please. Where’s Don? Don’t…they know he’s family?”

Again, the Robinsons looked around at each other, until Maureen said, “Don was arrested. He’s being held.”

“For what?” Penny asked.

“Seems like he found Liam before security did,” John said. “The boy ran and Don tackled him and I guess he roughed him up a little bit.”

Now Penny’s eyes teared up again. “I can’t believe Liam would…he was never cruel to me. I…don’t believe I misjudged him so badly.”

“We all did,” Judy said. “Well, most of us. Will warned me about him. I’m so sorry, Penny. I should have listened.”

“Not your fault. My brother…warned me too. Dad. Dad. Please. You have to find Will.”

Chapter Text

“So long as there is the observer and the observed as two separated entities, there is time….As long as there is this division time will go on. And time is sorrow.”
                - Krishnamurti

Penny and Judy were arguing outside his room as he tried to get some sleep. Judy had come over to talk to him about the engines, and Penny just happened to walk in then. After they argued for awhile, about something Will could not even remember, he told them he had to get some sleep, and walked off toward his cabin. After awhile they began to walk out, but seemed to stop right outside his door, and started in again.

They always seemed to argue now. It was as if, everything Judy said to Penny just set her off. But most of the time, Judy was absent, so when she just went to see Penny to ask her to do something or to admonish her for not helping or disappearing or just not putting in the effort that Judy expected, Will thought, he couldn’t really blame Penny for the way she responded.

The problem was, he was in the middle. He always was now, and it was very unusual for him, and hard for him to deal with. Before, the family dynamics between the siblings was always pretty clear.

Neither Will nor Penny questioned Judy’s authority in the absence of their parents. She had been taking care of them for as long as they could remember when their parents were gone. But especially during the three years of John’s long deployment, before the family left for space.

From the time Will was eight years old until he was eleven, he seldom saw his father, except on video calls or the one Christmas he was able to find a way to get home. These were the years the Resolute program was in full swing, and Maureen was working long hours. Penny was in Middle School, then her early years in high school, and there were always disagreements between the sisters. But Judy was patient with her younger sister, and Penny still respected Judy, and in the end their arguments were never serious.

But it wasn’t that way any longer. Penny was angry and rebellious and showed no signs of wanting to do anything to make Judy’s responsibilities any easier. And Will understood both of them and how they felt. So he did the best he could to be there for them. When Penny would go to him and complain about Judy, he would say he knew how she felt, then patiently tried to get Penny to see how much Judy had to deal with. And she was only nineteen years old.

When Judy went to Will to complain about Penny, Will would listen and say he knew how she felt, then would patiently try to explain how Penny loved Judy so much, and needed her, but that she was angry, and she was not the type of girl to keep that anger inside.

And Will? He was never really angry. He was just sad most of the time. He hated to see what was going on between his sisters, and he hated the fact they couldn’t talk to each other without fighting, and he hated that they both came and unloaded it all on him, like they couldn’t see what it was doing to him.

Of course they had no idea what he was going to do with SAR, and that just added to all the stress he was feeling. But seeing them constantly fighting like they didn’t even like each other anymore was the worst part about being stranded. He always knew he had to confront SAR, and he had no idea how that would turn out for him. But the thought that he might never see his parents again, and that the two people he loved more than anything in the world didn’t even seem like a family anymore, was maybe the worst thing that was happening.

And…he had no one to talk to. He had tried, so many times. But Judy was just always too busy, and Penny didn’t really want to give Judy any slack at all. So Will just listened to them both, and did all he could to be there for them when they needed to vent about each other.

He just wished he could talk to someone about it. He had tried to talk to Vijay, and Vijay was a very considerate boy, and Will thought, had they been closer to the same age, they could actually be friends. And since Will was maturing so quickly, the age difference didn’t seem to be much after the first two or three months on the planet. But by then, Penny was sneaking off to see Liam.

This just put Will in another impossible position. He tried to talk to Vijay one day when he saw him walking across the camp towards the tent they had set up as a mess hall. It seemed they all slipped into military jargon quickly, once they were stranded, and Will had no idea why. But there was suddenly a latrine, the tent where Judy usually stayed and where she operated from was called HQ, and then there was the mess hall. He caught up with Vijay and they sat together to eat lunch.

As soon as they were seated, Will decided he was going to try and talk to him about some of the things he was feeling. But they had no longer sat down, when Vijay said, “Hey, where’s Penny? I haven’t seen her all morning.”

Well, Will had seen her. He had seen her walking down toward the river with Liam. But he couldn’t tell Vijay that. So he lied, and said, “No, not sure where she is.”

“Does she seem different, Will?”

“Well…”

“Because she seems different to me. Just…I don’t know. Not as friendly or something.”

“She’s sort of that way with everyone. Not me so much, but definitely with Judy. And I’m kind of stuck in the middle with the two of them. I try to talk to them both but…”

“Well, has she said anything about me?” Vijay asked.

“No, not really,” he said. “She just…”

“Would you tell me if she did? I don’t mean anything confidential, you know. I just mean if she mentions being mad at me or something. Would you let me know so I can make sure whatever it is I’m doing, I stop doing?”

“Yeah, if she does, and it isn’t something confidential, I’ll let you know.”

“Thanks Will,” he said, standing. He hadn’t even finished his MRE. “I’m glad we had this talk. And thanks for everything you’re doing for us to try and get us off this planet. Seriously. I know how much we are all counting on you. If you ever need anything from me, let me know.” He turned and walked off toward the tent where Penny always slept.

Will sighed, watching him walk away. “Thanks, Vijay,” he said under his breath. “If I ever need anything I’ll let you know.” But he didn’t blame Vijay. He knew the kid was hopelessly in love, or at least completely infatuated with his sister.

He really couldn’t understand how Penny and Vijay and Liam had time to think about such things. And some of the other kids as well. He knew some of them were hooking up. It was hard to keep those things secret with such a small group living together. Of course those kids were older than he was, but it wasn’t that he didn’t think about girls, and what it would be like to have a girlfriend, or even be in love. But the idea just seemed so foreign to him right now. He had too much responsibility, and every minute of his day was taken up trying to figure out how to get more titanium and get the engines operable.

A couple of girls had talked to him in the first few weeks, and acted as if they liked him, but then they just sort of disappeared and never came near him again. He thought he must have said something to run them off, but it didn’t really matter. He had responsibilities that were much more important than that. But, at thirteen, he was insecure when it came to girls, and he couldn’t help but wonder if it was just that they didn’t like him.

Kids never really liked him back on Earth. He was smarter than them, even when he tried to hide it by not answering questions in school, and sitting in the back of the room. But teachers called on him anyway, and when he lied and said he didn’t know the answer to something, the other kids laughed. They all knew he was lying.

So having the girls on this planet talk to him a couple of times, then not even acknowledge him afterwards, just made him more insecure. If girls didn’t like him when they were stranded on this planet with limited options, he felt he was never going to have a chance with them. But then he would just think, his chances of survival once he went to confront SAR were probably slim anyway, so what was the point?

But with all of these things going on with him that year, and no one to talk to about them, how could it not change him?

These were the thoughts he was having as his sisters argued outside his door. Finally, he decided he wasn’t ever going to get to sleep. He opened his eyes. But he wasn’t in his room. He didn’t know where he was. The light was dim, and had a strange orange glow. But before he could figure out what had happened to him and where he was, he was asleep again.

He seemed to drift in and out of consciousness for hours. It could even have been days. All he knew was that he would dream, and most times couldn’t remember his dreams, but then would open his eyes and see the orange light surrounding him and nothing else, then he would be sleeping again.

One dream he could remember that seemed to be recurring was of him drifting off in space again, after closing the hatch on the Jupiter 2. His father had not been able to save him, and he was just going to drift into the cold darkness until he died. But he opened his eyes slightly, and figured maybe it wouldn’t take that long for him to die, because he was floating towards a light. It seemed big and bright, and almost solid white. Like a moon, but through the slits in his eyes it seemed as if there were two of them. Double moons. And he was getting closer and closer to them, and he knew their gravity had to be pulling him in, and it was only minutes before he died.

He opened his eyes fully. They were’t moons at all. They were eyes. Large, pure white eyes, with no pupils. Like he was looking into the eyes of a blind person, but the eyes seemed to be incredibly large. He opened his mouth to scream, but no sound came out, so he closed his eyes again, and opened them, thinking whatever this was might be just another vision his dying brain was sending him.

But they were still there. They were closer, as if whatever this thing was had leaned down over him, after realizing he was not dead. And he saw the eyes did have pupils, they were just so small, he hadn’t noticed at first. They were like tiny blue dots in the center of all the white. He tried to speak, but couldn’t. He didn’t know if there was something wrong with him, or if he was just too frightened. Or maybe he had finally died.

He felt something slide under his back. It seemed small and brittle, almost like a stick. He felt his upper body rising, and realized whatever this thing was, it had slipped a small arm behind him and was lifting his upper body. It put something to his lips. A straw of some kind, though it was made of metal.

He sipped on the straw, and only then did he realize how thirsty he was. He drew deeply, and felt a cool, sweet liquid coat his parched throat. He wanted to continue sipping, but the straw was withdrawn, and the tiny arm lowered him back down.

He tried to talk again. Will—being Will—just wanted to say thank you. That had been the sweetest and coldest water he had ever tasted, and he felt a deep desire to express his gratitude for the kindness. It was the kindness that was really important, after the last hours or days or weeks of what he had experienced. But he was still unable to speak, and whatever this thing was, it withdrew into the orange light, and Will fell asleep once again.

When he finally woke, he seemed more lucid and aware of his surroundings. He didn’t move at first, he just stared up at the orange light that surrounded him, trying to focus on what it was he was seeing. He was alive. He was aware enough to know that. And as he lay there, wondering where he was and what had happened to him, he began to think of the dreams he had had of the different deaths.

He couldn’t understand why he dreamt of these deaths he had survived. It was almost as if, whatever forces existed in the universe that had brought him to this end, they were not satisfied with his horrible, slow demise. They wanted to torture his mind and soul as well.

He had assumed this would be how he would live out the final days of his life. With fleeting memories of his loved ones, and horrible dreams of the deaths he had survived. But he was alive. Somehow he was alive.

He tried to move his body, thinking the vines or veins, still secured him. But his arms moved. He brought them to his face, felt around. Nothing. No vines on his head. He was very weak, but he wasn’t in pain. At first, the vines had hurt him everywhere, but he had gotten used to that. He remembered a quote his dad was fond of, when trying to say you can fight through unimaginable things if you have strong will: “Your body can get used to anything if you do it long enough. Even hanging.” He guessed that was true because he certainly had experienced a slow death, in his mind at least. But it was the getting used to part he wasn’t sure about. He would never forget it.

He could move his arms and hands, but turning his head was difficult and caused a lot of pain, but, he finally turned it slightly to the right. Now he saw what was causing the weird lighting. There were two torches on the other side of this room, maybe ten feet from where he lay.

Between the torches was a rug, and on the rug was an old man. He looked ancient. Though he was seated, Will could tell he was very small. Maybe no taller than four feet. He was pale white, had a long gray beard, and his eyes were unusually big and round. He sat in silence, watching Will. Though Will didn’t think he could see him at all, because he still felt the little man was blind. His eyes were what Will had mistaken for moons. And this was the person who had given him a drink. And maybe it was how he had escaped from the thing that had held him.

Will tried to speak but couldn’t. Now the little old man pushed himself to his feet. It seemed to take forever, because it looked as if this man was ninety years old. Maybe older. Finally, once the man was standing, he stepped out of the light and a few minutes later returned, carrying something in each hand. He slowly approached Will and knelt beside him.

Will tried to speak again, but the man placed a cold, shriveled hand on his lips. Will knew he was telling him not to try and talk, so he just watched as the man sat one of the items down, and put an arm behind his back and raised his upper body as before. He again put a straw to Will’s lips and let him drink of the cool, sweet liquid. The man didn’t let him have much before removing the straw.

Will nodded to him, to acknowledge his gratitude. The man sat the metal container down that held the liquid, and brought something small and square to Will’s mouth. The boy took a bite and slowly began chewing. It had very little flavor, but Will was thankful for anything, as he suddenly realized how hungry he was.

The old man didn’t let him eat much, but gave him more of the drink. Will once again tried to speak, but the man held his hand up, shook his head slightly, then removed his arm and lowered Will’s upper body back to the ground. Will realized he was resting on a mat of some kind, and lying under a thin blanket, and his clothes were gone. Before long he was asleep once again.

Will woke several times, and the man was always there, and each time, if Will tried to speak, the man shook his head, gave him drink, and a little food. This went on for a couple of days, or maybe more than a couple, and Will slowly began to get some strength back.

Finally, when Will woke he felt stronger and was able to push himself to a half sitting position. The man was still there, watching him. Will didn’t say anything to him at first. He just looked back at his own body, where his chest and arms were exposed. He was so skinny. He remembered when he broke his wrist when he was eight years old, he had to have surgery, and then was in a cast for several weeks. When the cast was finally removed, his forearm was pale white, and the skin seemed shriveled. His arm seemed to have shrunk from atrophy while it was in the cast, and was smaller than his other one. That’s how his whole body looked now.

Will didn’t know how long he had been here, but everything except his head had been beneath the ground when the organism had captured him. Will had no idea how long that ordeal had gone on, but it had been at least several days. He remembered looking up at the sky at night several times, and then he would wake up and it would be daylight. He had no way of knowing how long it had been. His body looked as if it had been much longer than Will had thought. But maybe it was because the thing that had him was draining him the whole time.

As Will looked down at his weakened, pale body, he realized the old man must have kept him clean for however long he had been here. He looked to his right, where the man was sitting on the rug between the torches, as he had been each time Will woke.

“Hi,” Will said. It hurt his throat to talk, but he was happy to see that he could. “I don’t think you can understand me, but thank you for taking care of me.” Will nodded as he said this, and smiled a little, thinking he could express himself that way.

The small old man just looked back at him.

“Can you understand me?” Will asked. When the man didn’t answer, Will said, “Did you free me from the vines?”

The man still didn’t respond.

Will didn’t know what to do now, so he laid back down and closed his eyes. After a while, he looked back at the man, who was still sitting motionless, watching him. “Can you tell me how long I have been here?” He knew it had to be past Christmas, and his family would be worried sick.

The old man just stared at him without making a sound.

“I had a friend. He was not human. He was a Robot.” Will raised his hand high, trying to show the man that Robot was taller than a human. “Did you see him?”

No answer.

“Where am I?” Will asked.

Still the man only stared.

“My name is…”

“I…know you…Will Robinson,” the old man said, in an aged, gravelly, voice. He spoke very slowly, pronouncing each word distinctly, and pausing between some of them, as if struggling for the right one. Though Will didn’t think the man had any problem finding the words. It was just an odd speech pattern, as if the man seldom spoke.

“How do you know me?” Will asked.

Again no answer.

“Why did you free me?” Will asked.

“You…are not…free.”

Now you are free. For some reason, the old man’s words made Will think of what SAR had said to him before the cold steel went inside his heart. “So I am your prisoner?”

For the first time, the old man smiled, though it was gone in an instant.

“How can you speak English?” Will asked.

“I…observe,” the man replied slowly.

“You observe? I don’t understand. You observe what? You learned to speak English by observing me?”

Again, the man was silent. Will was confused, and now he was pretty sure he was still dreaming. Or maybe he was past dreaming. I wonder if I’m dying.

“Of…course,” the man said in his strange, halting speech pattern.

“So you can read my mind, too? Look. I don’t have time for this. Either I need to finish dying, or if I’m not, I need to find my friend and get home. I don’t know if I’m late. I don’t know how long I was out. I don’t know how long I’ve been here. I need to leave. If I’m not dying, there’s no time to try and figure this out.”

“Time,” the old man said, and smiled again.

“What? You’re going to tell me time is an illusion?” Will asked. “Do you think that’s something I haven’t heard?”

“Time…is truth. And time…is sorrow.”

Will’s head was cloudy, and he had no idea what this old man was trying to say. And he had no time for it. “Okay. If you helped me when I was trapped in the vines, or veins, or whatever they are, thank you. But I have to go.”

The man just stared back at him.

Will looked past him, where this chamber they were in continued. He turned his head and looked the other way. Now he realized they seemed to be in a tunnel of sorts, and the space they were in was widened.

“Can you tell me how to get out of here? How to get back to the surface?”

“You…are there,” the man replied.

“So it is a dream.”

The man just looked at him.

“Whatever,” Will answered. He was thankful the man had helped him, and was pretty sure he had to have saved him from whatever it was that had captured him. But he was tired of the game and just wanted to get away now. He had to get back to the Jupiter 2, where he hoped he would find Robot.

He began to push himself to his feet, but stopped. “Can you tell me something?” He asked the old man. “That thing that had me, what was it?”

Will thought he was going to ignore him again. “It had to have intelligence,” Will said. “It could read my mind, I think.” He remembered saying to himself that being trapped and fed off of had to be the worst death in the world, and then he immediately began having visions of the deaths he had survived.The thing must have sent him those visions.

“Do you know what it is?” He tried again.

“There are many…names…for what it is.”

Somehow the answer seemed familiar to Will, but he didn’t know why, and it didn’t answer his question. “Where is it from?” Will asked.

“Another…world.”

“Another world? What’s this other world like?” Will asked, now becoming amused at this old man and his mind games.

“Like…nothing you have imagined. Like…everything you can imagine.”

“What is this world?” Will asked.

“The world you…seek.”

“I don’t seek any world except my own. On Alpha Centauri.”

“You cannot…lie…to yourself…Will Robinson.”

The void. That’s what entered Will’s mind. And he didn’t know why, but suddenly he had the feeling he didn’t want to know. So he asked one more question. “If that…thing…is not from this world, why is it here?”

“To serve…its…purpose.”

Purpose. That was the second time the old man had used that word. “What is its purpose?”

It seemed as if the man had stopped talking again, but after a long pause, he said one word: “Fear.”

Will didn’t know what he meant, but there was no doubt that the thing had brought him nothing but fear. And hopelessness. And he would remember it forever.  “Okay, I’m going to get going,” he said. “Which direction do I go? Past you, or back behind me?” He wanted to point, but thought he might be too week, and wondered how he would ever be able to walk out of here. Will looked down the tunnels again. When the man didn’t answer, he asked, “So it’s up to me?”

“Is…it?” The man asked, slowly.

Will shook his head in exasperation. “See you later,” he said.

“It is…certain.”

Will began to push himself to his feet, and was almost standing, but he was so weak, he fell back down. And he suddenly couldn’t keep his eyes open, he was so tired. He was vaguely aware the old man with the moons for eyes had approached him, and leaned down until his face was inches from Will’s, and this time he spoke clearly, with no hesitation in his voice:

“When you leave this place, leave quickly and never return. There is only death for you here, Will Robinson. Death and sorrow.”

Will didn’t know how long it was before he woke again, but when he turned to look for the old man, the torches were there, but the man was gone and so was the rug he had been sitting on. But when Will pushed himself to a sitting position, he saw his clothes were in a pile at his feet.

He crawled over to them and began to pull them on, and once he was dressed, he again tried to stand. He seemed stronger now, though he was wobbly.

Which direction? He had no food or water. The man had taken care of him for days, but had left him nothing when he disappeared. But now Will wondered if he had dreamed it all. He had had a backpack but it was long gone, along with his supplies. His video camera was also gone, and everything they had recorded since leaving Alpha Centauri.

He walked slowly over and took one of the torches from a hole in the ground where it had been placed, and chose a direction and started walking. He was sore and very weak and it was slow going. And now he felt his skin was raw. He held the torch close and brought his arm near the flame. He couldn’t see any signs of where the vines had been feeding from him.

He kept walking. The tunnel didn’t change for hours. Will plodded on. Finally it made a sharp turn, and as he started to round the corner, he could see something on the wall. He stopped and looked closely. There was writing and diagrams, but nothing he had ever seen before.

Will didn’t know how long he walked. He had to stop often and sit down with his back against the wall to rest. The last few kilometers or so, the tunnel had begun to climb, and it grew steeper with each step. Will had begun to think he might not make it to the top, but he finally stepped out into a gray sky, and a cold misty rain.

He was on top of one of the hills they had been walking towards. At least he thought that’s where he was, though everything was different. There were no red vines anywhere. Actually, where he stood on the hill, there was nothing but rock, as if he were high atop a mountain. Too high for anything to grow. And that’s the feeling he had. But they had flown over no mountain range like that on the planet.

As he looked around, all he saw were thick gray clouds. He was in the middle of them. He looked out across the surface. Below him, a valley stretched toward the horizon for miles. It was white. “Ice,” he said. It was like he was looking at a desert of ice. Something else they had not seen on the planet after entering the atmosphere.

Beyond the icy desert he thought there might be more hills, or a mountain range. If so, it was impossible to tell, because everything was cloud covered.

He suddenly felt like he had to cross this desert of ice, to see what was on the other side. There was something out there, he knew. But he had no idea where he was, and he was really cold now, and wet, and knew he couldn’t survive out there on the ice. He decided he could only go back the way he had come.

As, he turned, it felt almost like he had to fight the urge to go back, the need for crossing the ice was almost overpowering. He pulled himself away and started back down the trail, then into the tunnel once again. He made his way back, looking for the place where the tunnel widened and where the little old man had sat, but after walking for what seemed like hours, he never found the chamber. Eventually he sat down to rest again, closed his eyes, thinking he would sleep for a few minutes, and soon drifted off.

When Will woke, he was lying flat, staring up into a blue sky. Somehow he had escaped from the tunnel. He pushed himself up, and sat looking all around.

There were no red vines anywhere. He was just lying a few meters from the edge of the swamp, and it looked like it had before. He couldn’t find the torch he had been carrying. 

He stood. He was still wobbly, but other than that, he seemed to be fine. He looked at his arms and legs. There was no indication that anything had been connected to him, feeding from him. But he was still pale and very skinny. He heard thunder and looked behind him, back over the hills. The sky was blue above him, but it looked like a storm was brewing back there. He was cold. The weather on the planet had been warm and pleasant since they had arrived, but it had changed, and he had nothing with him.

He didn’t care about discomfort, he cared about Robot. His friend would never leave him, so something had to have happened to him. He needed to get away from this place as soon as possible and find him. He saw the strange trees in the swamp in front of him. Maybe Robot had gone back the way they had come. He looked behind him toward the hills. It all must have been a dream. He began walking toward the swamp.

He hadn’t gone far before the rain started coming down. Will didn’t know how that would affect the ground, but he didn’t want to get caught in the swamp if it flooded. Soon, it was pouring so hard he couldn’t see far in front of him, as the cloud cover had moved in, and visibility was limited. It thundered again, and he involuntarily ducked when the following lightening struck, seemingly on top of him.

The rain had caused the swamp to be a lot harder to navigate, but he was determined not to stop until he got back to the Chariot. Or at least to the canyon. The sparse trees, the moss and vines growing from them, and the flashing of the lightening made the landscape almost surreal. Like a dystopian world, void of any life, save himself. He had no intention of spending the night there.

By the time he was to the canyon, the storm was on top of him, and he was shivering. The trail was slick, so he had to carefully pick his way back down to keep from falling. Once back at the crevasse, he stepped inside and crossed over to the wall with the drawings. It was as he remembered it, so at least the entire thing hadn’t been a dream.

Part of the canyon wall here curved in, and he moved back against it and sat down, hoping he could stay a little while and maybe the hardest rain would stop. But he sat for an hour and the rain never let up, and the wall didn’t offer as much cover as he had hoped, so he started back down the trail. It took him twice as long this time, with the trail so dangerous, and at the bottom, the small stream they had crossed—whenever that was—was much higher. Still it was passable, and he made it to the other side. But it was almost dark. He knew he couldn’t keep going with no light, but he found a ledge under the wall on that side where he could crawl in and get out of the rain and try to catch some sleep.

He was shivering, and decided he wouldn’t get much rest, but when he opened his eyes it was morning. It was still cloudy and cold, but at least the rain had stopped. He was hungry, but there was nothing to eat. He crawled out from under the ledge and walked toward the stream. He knelt down. He wished he had his backpack to test the water, but he knew he had to drink or he might not make it back to the ship. He scooped the water up in his palms and drank, but not too much, then he started on, hoping he wouldn’t be sick.

He left the canyon and entered the forest. Finally, sometime before nightfall, he stepped into the clearing where they had left the Chariot. It was still there, but there was no sign of Robot. He wanted to get back to the Jupiter and see if, for some reason, Robot had gone back, but he was just too exhausted. He opened the back hatch and took out the emergency kit, drank his fill of water, ate an MRE, then crawled in the back seat and slept until morning.

When he woke, the rain had stopped and the temperature was climbing, and it looked like it was going to be another nice day, like it had been when they first arrived. I wonder how long ago that was, he thought.

He started the Chariot and headed across the valley back to the ship. He had tried to connect several times to Robot, but had not been able to sense him, and was really concerned.

He pulled the Chariot up and climbed out near the Jupiter 2, and ran up the ramp to the hatch, powered the door open and yelled, “Robot! Robot!”

But the ship was quiet. He checked each bedroom quickly as he walked by them, checked the Hub and the Flight Deck, then climbed down the ladder to the engine room. And there he found part of him. His head. “Robot…” Will said quietly.

He got on his knees by Robot’s head, looked into his face shield. “I’ll fix you Robot, don’t worry. We’ve been here before. I’ll find the rest of you and fix you. Just like before.”

He was trying not to cry, but seeing his friend like this was almost more than he could stand. He started to reach for Robot’s head, to pick it up and put it somewhere safe before looking for the rest of him, when he heard the elevator power up and begin to descend, and he remembered what the little old man in his dream had said:

“When you leave this place, leave quickly, and never return. There is only death for you here, Will Robinson. Death and sorrow.”

Chapter Text

Victor and Grant were sitting with John, Maureen, and Judy in the grove of trees in their front yard. “No ideas at all of where to start looking?” Victor asked.

“No,” John answered. “the only thing we can think of is going back where the kids were stranded.” He looked at Grant. “Where you all were stranded.”

“That’s a very dangerous place, John,” Grant said. “The asteroid field surrounding the planet almost wrecked us when we left.”

“I know, Grant,” Maureen said. “But we’re still convinced Will may have had a destination in mind when he left. And that’s the only thing we can think of. That he wants to find out more about the aliens who built the robots.”

“But from what the kids said, everything was destroyed,” Victor said.

“Well, they were all dead,” Maureen replied “But that doesn’t mean Will didn’t go back looking for clues. At any rate, we really have nothing else to go on. We’ve searched his room, his data. There are no clues anywhere. Though we all know Will enough to know if he wanted to cover his tracks he probably could.”

“It’s more dangerous, now,” Judy said. “Will barely escaped the caves before we left the planet. It was like Indiana Jones. There was some kind of disruption, and a lot of the underground city may have been buried. Doctor Smith and I thought it was a tremor or something when we went to look for Will. But he told us it had something to do with a control panel.

“He took the alien hand skeleton and that was how he was able to get the panel to work. And it gave off the signals like we heard with the alien spaceships. He assumed at first it was all about controlling the robots with the signals. But it also caused more destruction. Will wasn’t sure what it was doing. There was something there that resembled the alien ship. You know, how Robot could stand in the middle and pilot it? But that didn’t react to the signals. Will said it was like the city contained something else, and when he placed the skeleton hand on each control, whatever it was powered on, and with the destruction that had already been done, the whole cave system began to collapse. We might not even be able to get in there. And if we do, it’s bound to be dangerous.”

“Well, it seems like we have no choice,” John said.

“Well, if you go, I’m going with you,” Grant said.

“We can’t ask you to do that,” John said.

“You don’t have to ask me. Other than the kids, I’m the only one who has been there. And if it hadn’t been for your kids, I would still be there. You’re all my family too, and I’m not going to let you go alone.”

Maureen said, “Victor, would you mind if Penny…”

“Maureen, you don’t have to ask,” Victor said. “You know we’ll look after her. How’s she doing now?”

“She’ll be okay,” Maureen said. “She’s beating herself up some over not figuring out what Liam was really like.”

“Any idea on whether Don will spend some time behind bars?” Grant asked.

“His hearing is day after tomorrow,” John said. “He’s been held for a week, but I guess things move a little slower here.”

Judy stood up.

“Where are you going?” Maureen asked.

“I’m going to see Penny.”

It was true, Judy was going to see Penny. But Vijay was there she knew, and she hadn’t seen Don since he had been arrested the week before. So she made a stop at Alpha Security first.

Judy was in the waiting area when they walked him in. He was smiling.

“Hey Doc,” he said, and hugged her before sitting down across from her.

“Are you okay?” She asked.

“Oh yeah. It’s just a vacation. Penny called me too.”

“She was kind of touched by what you did,” Judy said.

“Well, I didn’t plan it. I was just going to drive by and see if I saw him, but he pulled up and I realized he had been out at the same time this happened, so it had to be him. And when he ran, I knew it was.”

“Don, I’m just so impressed at what you did.”

“You’re my family, Doc. And Robinsons stick together.”

“We try,” she said, sadly.

Don knew what the problem was. “Still nothing from Will?”

“No. I think we’re going to try and find him.”

“How? Is there any clue about where he went?”

“No,” Judy said. “But everyone thinks if he had a plan, it has something to do with the aliens who made the robots. So we’re going to go there. Back to the planet we were stranded on.”

“When? I have a hearing coming up in two days. If I get released, I can go.”

“And they’ll put you back in jail as soon as you come back,” Judy said.

“You don’t think I’m going to let you all do this on your own do you? How many times did I save your ass when we were in space?”

They both stared at each other. “Okay, maybe not as many as Will. Or your dad. Or your mom…or you…or…I’m still going with you.”

“You think they’ll release you?” She asked.

“I don’t know. Your mom and dad said they will be there and put in a good word for me. So maybe. If they do, I’m going.”

Judy stood and hugged him. “I have to go see Penny.”

“Okay, Doc. Thanks for coming by. Hey…wait a minute. You came by to tell me because you knew I would want to go, didn’t you?”

“Would I do that?”

“Yes you would.”

“I just can’t imagine going back to space without Don West.” She smiled and hugged him again and started to leave. “Of course, that means Penny will be here by herself while we’re gone.”

“I thought she was staying with the Dhar’s,” Don said.

“Yeah. She is. I guess everything will be fine. See you later, Don.”

“Wait. Wait. Wait. You don’t think the Dhar’s will take care of her?”

“Of course they will, Don. I guess, it’s just that Victor is a politician, and Vijay is the nicest guy in the world, but he’s not…well…

“Tough?” Don asked.

“Tough? Not really the word I was thinking of. I was thinking of resourceful.”

“Well, your parents seem to think everything will be fine,” Don said.

“Yeah. They thought it would be fine to let Will explore the galaxy too. I guess I’m feeling kind of guilty that I didn’t take care of Will and Penny like I should have on that planet.”

“But you don’t want to stay behind with Penny?”

“I can’t. I mean, Grant’s going, and he’s been there. But other than Doctor Smith and Penny, I’m the only one who knows where that alien city is. Plus, I’ve flown in and out of that canyon. I sort of need to be there.”

“Fine, Judy. I’ll stay and make sure Penny’s safe. If they let me out.”

She hugged him again. “I knew we could count on you Don.”

When she walked out Don sat at the table and watched her leave. “She fuckin played me,” he said. He smiled.

When Judy arrived at the hospital, Penny was lying on her back, eyes closed, her journal lying across her stomach. Judy tried to quietly take the chair beside the bed, but Penny opened her eyes and looked at her.

“Did I wake you?” Judy asked.

“No. I wasn’t really asleep. Vijay left a few minutes ago. I was thinking about writing, but just started reading some things I wrote about our trip, and was thinking.”

Judy sat down. “About what?”

“What do you think?”

“Will, of course.”

“Will of course,” Penny agreed. “Do you think Mom and Dad are right, Judy? That Will really had something in mind when he left? I thought so too, and I asked him the night before he left, but he denied it.”

“Yes. I think they’re right. I just hate that none of us thought of that at the time. Well, maybe you did. But now that we’ve all talked about it, it just seems like we should have known better. We all know Will. He’s too damn thoughtful to just go off exploring. And think about it. He could have done that here. We just got here a few months ago. He loved camping with the family. He and Robot, exploring the planet for weeks at a time. He would have loved that. He didn’t need to go back to space.”

“But what if he did, Judy? Need to?”

“What do you mean?”

“I know you weren’t around him as much on the planet…”

“Penny…”

“I’m not blaming you or attacking you for that anymore. You had to do what you did. But I got pretty close to him. Not so much like an older sister anymore. But as equals. He changed a lot. At least that’s what I kept saying to myself. He changed. But maybe he didn’t so much. Maybe his true personality just shined once Mom and Dad weren’t around. Actually, when Dad wasn’t around. But lying here in bed with nothing to do, I’ve been thinking a lot about it. About him, when Dad was on the long deployment before we left for space. He used to try and be the man of the house back then. Responsible for me and you and Mom. In his little nine and ten year old mind.”

“Like when he thought he heard noises downstairs that night and fell asleep at the top of the stairs with the baseball bat, and his football helmet on?” Judy asked, and they both laughed.

“Yeah, like that. He wanted to protect us. But, did you ever notice some of the little things he did back then?”

“Yeah,” Judy said. “He started trying be be more responsible. Always the first one up before school. Mom or me used to always wake him for school, unless you did first. But he started setting his alarm earlier.”

“Actually two alarms,” Penny said. “His radio and an old desk top one that Grandpa used to have. So if one didn’t work, the other was a backup. And he used to try to cook breakfast for us and Mom. He wasn’t very good at it.” They laughed again.

“But we ate every bite,” Judy said. “Remember the bacon that first time? It was like little fried strips of Jerky.”

“And…we ate every bite,” Penny said.

“We sure did. He got pretty good at French Toast, though.”

“Yeah,” Penny agreed. “But I was thinking, when Dad came back, everything changed for all of us. But for Will most of all. He went from being the man of the house, with all those responsibilities he put in his little kid head, to the baby of the family again.

“I mean, he was glad Dad was home. All of us were. But he just seemed…nervous around Dad. And he stopped doing a lot of those things. He stopped setting his alarm to get up early. And he got quieter. And just didn’t seem happy. I think he was trying to figure out who he was, and how he fit in with the rest of the family after Dad was home.

“I think it’s like, he can’t let himself be a child. He needs a purpose. And when we were stranded on the planet, he went right back to the way he was when Dad was gone. He knew what he had to do, and he was prepared to die to do it. And he almost did.”

“But where are you going with this, Penny?”

“Well, the few months we’ve been here, it was the same as when Dad came back. What’s his purpose? He can’t think about just jumping back in school. Preparing for a future doing…whatever. I mean, if you’re eleven years old and you save an alien robot’s life, and that robot becomes your best fiend, and you’re twelve years old and you save your family’s life over and over again, and you’re thirteen years old, and you save…the whole fucking colony…I mean, what’s left? You probably think it’s time to relax…but maybe not.”

“Actually, I know exactly what you’re saying,” Judy said. “I’ve been feeling it a little myself. I have four doctors standing over me if I have to do anything halfway serious, and I just keep thinking…this is nothing compared to the decisions I’ve had to make since I was eighteen years old.”

“Yeah, I bet you feel that every day.  On the other hand, you have your career. I have my writing. How do you think Will feels? He’s always had so many things he talked about doing, but what if the most important thing you’ve ever done, you did when you were eleven years old? What do you do next?”

“Go back to space,” Judy answered. “To explore. That, or try to figure out why all of these things have been happening.”

“Yeah,” Penny agreed “I think Will has something he’s trying to figure out.”

“What?” Judy asked.

“He’s trying to figure out who he is. And Judy, we’re going to have to help him. Otherwise, I’m really worried about him. And I don’t mean because he’s missing. We should have expected that. I mean, because he could be a danger to himself.”

“Danger? How?”

“He’s the opposite of scared now. I’m afraid he’s no longer grounded like he was. When we were all taking care of him.”

“Yeah. You know something Penny, you’re kind of growing up yourself. You’ve been giving this a lot of thought haven’t you?”

“It’s not like I’ve had anything else to do. If I don’t think about Will I start thinking about Liam, and then I go from pissed to just so sad that I didn’t ever know him.”

“Yeah. But what about you, Penny? I was talking to Don, and he’s kind of restless too. And so’s Dad. I can tell. He’s no damn farmer.”

Penny laughed. “How come everyone can see that but him?”

“Because he wants to want to be a farmer,” Judy said. “But don’t you want to do something more…exciting?”

“More exciting than what, a robot war? More exciting than getting shot by your ex boyfriend? No. I’m nothing like that. I want to write about those things. But I am completely fine if I never have to experience them again. I never want to step foot in a spaceship as long as I live.”

Judy stood up and hugged her. “I love you, Penny.”

“I love you too.”

“Mom and Dad will be here in a little while, and I’ll be back up. I have to run down to the lab. I left some things pending since I haven’t been in for awhile.”

The next day, John and Maureen walked into the court room with Judy. Don was already there at the front table with his lawyer. The prosecutor was sitting across from them at a table, alone.

The Judge walked in. She sat in her chair, looked out at the few people in the room, and said, “This is a preliminary hearing to decide if this case should go forward, and if Don West should be prosecuted.”

“Your honor,” The prosecutor said and stood. “The victim of the alleged crime has decided not to press charges.”

Don turned around and looked at the Robinsons and shrugged his shoulders.

“And considering the circumstances, the Robinson girl and what her family has done for this colony, Alpha Security is asking to drop all charges as well, and release Don West immediately.”

The Judge looked over at Don. “Mr. West, do you want to make a statement in your own defense…or anything?”

Don stood. “No your Honor. I’m guilty, obviously. I don’t know why Liam and his family decided not to press charges, but if he is not in custody her life is still in danger, and I’m more worried about that than whether you’re going to keep me locked up.”

“That’s an unusual statement. Is there any remorse?”

“No, your Honor.”

The Judge sighed. “I’m trying to help you, Mr. West.”

“I understand your Honor. And I appreciate that. But someone needs to make sure Liam is not a danger. To Penny or anyone else.”

“Your Honor,” The prosecutor said. “He is still being held and we have no plans to release him until there is a complete investigation.”

“Are you satisfied, Mr. West?”

“Never,” he said.

They waited until Don was released a couple of hours later, then they called Grant, and all headed to the Robinsons. They were gathered around the dining room table.

“We need a robot that will do it,” Maureen said. “Any ideas, Don?”

“The Engineer?” Don said. This was the robot that made the most changes in the designs, and the robot that Don seemed to always be arguing with. Though the robot never argued. He just did whatever he wanted, even with Don standing beside him telling him not to touch something or to put something back the way he had it. The robot would continue to work, and Maureen would stop by and look at what he did, agree with him, and walk away, leaving Don steaming.

“You just want to get him away so you can reverse everything he has been working on, don’t you?” Maureen asked, smiling at the man.

“No, I think he’s the best one we have,” Don replied.

“Don, thank you for staying with Penny. Besides, I need you at Alpha. If I don’t…while I’m gone…you’re going to be in charge. You’ve been working side by side with me and the robots. No one on the team understands the robots like you do.”

“Yeah, I’ll stay for Penny. And I’ll try not to change too much at Alpha while you’re gone. But I’m bored to tears. I need some excitement in my life. I wish I was going.”

“You’ve been in jail for two weeks,” Grant said. “That wasn’t exciting enough?”

“Exciting? All I did was read manuals on the Resolute 2 and try and make sure the robots haven’t completely fucked anything up.”

“Have they?” John asked.

“Well…I’m still looking,” he said. “And that’s what I’ll be doing at Alpha while you’re gone.”

Maureen said, “Everything they have done has improved the design.”

“Yeah, yeah. I know,” Don said. “I probably won’t find anything to change anyway.”

“Don, I’m sorry you’re not going with us,” Maureen said. “But I really need you here. Not just for the Resolute. For Penny too.”

“I don’t mean to interrupt, but I’m going to,” Grant said. “If Will isn’t there, what do we do?”

“Then I want to take a look at the alien city,” Maureen said. “If we can reach it after the collapse.”

“What do you expect to find there?” Grant asked.

“Clues for where Will might be,” she answered.

“Come on Maureen,” Grant said. “You haven’t changed that much. Of course you’re going to look for clues to find Will, but I have a feeling if Will hadn’t disappeared, you would be planning on going back to that planet anyway.”

“She has a theory,” John said.

“Of course she does,” Don said.

“It’s not really a theory. There’s a mystery here. Why did this alien civilization want to destroy humans? What did humans do to it? Are there other humans in the universe that this alien civilization is aware of, and if so, what did they do to them to make them create these robots and program them to destroy human life wherever they found it?  They scanned you, and a robot immediately traveled to Earth to destroy it.”

“How do you know that’s what they were doing?” Grant asked. “The ship crashed before we knew what they wanted.”

“Well, I think their aggressiveness toward us was a pretty good indication,” John said.

“Maybe,” Don said. “But remember that robot could have killed me and didn’t.”

“We knew what they wanted then,” Judy said. “They wanted my brother.”

“Yeah,” Don agreed, “But my point is, if they were interested in annihilating the entire human race, that robot could have eliminated one of the most important members of it right then.”

“We don’t really know, and that’s the point,” Maureen said. “Will and I are a lot alike. And the fact that there was an alien civilization that we never knew existed means Will would want to do the same thing I want to do. Find out more about them.”

“Even after one of them stabbed him in the heart?” Grant asked.

“Yes,” Judy said. “Even then. Or he never would have wanted to go back to space as soon as we landed. Will is different. Different than he was when we first left Earth.”

“Well, he’s older,” John said. “He’s bound to leave some of childhood his fears behind.”

“It’s more than that,” Judy said. “He’s changed. He’s…reckless.”

“Reckless?” Maureen asked.

“I don’t know if that’s the right word. But Will was always so dependent on me. And I don’t think I took very good care of him on that planet.”

“Judy…” John said. “You’re still blaming yourself for what happened to him.

“Yes, I am. He’s different. Different than anyone I’ve ever met. He was always so sensitive growing up, and the three of us were so close, but Penny and I always watched out for him. And when I wasn’t there anymore, Penny rebelled, and Will sort of withdrew. He was dealing with what he was going to do. I know. But I still think it’s more than that. And I just think I should have done better than I did.”

“Judy, you’re having the same regrets that every parent has,” Maureen says. “And you’re more than Will and Penny’s sister. You’ve been there when your dad and I wasn’t. You’ve been their surrogate parent. Both mother and father. So you’re bound to have those regrets too. Especially after what happened to Will.”

“And Penny too, now,” Judy added.

Grant reached out and put his hand on her arm. “It’s true, what your mother says. I wasn’t around, and now all I have are regrets.”

“So, when are you leaving?” Don asked.

“Alpha gave us clearance. The Jupiter is ready, we’ll pick up the engine at the space station. All we need is to convince the Engineer to take us. But I don’t think that will be a problem.”

“Not if he knows I’m staying,” Don said. “He doesn’t like me.”

“He doesn’t dislike you,” Maureen said.

“Well, that’s true. He ignores me. But I suggest you tell him I’m staying behind anyway, just in case it helps motivate him.”

“I’ll try. But to answer your question, Don, Penny gets out of the hospital in two days. We’ll tell her then, and wait a couple of weeks to make sure she’s okay, then we leave.”

Chapter Text

Penny was released from the hospital two days later, and two weeks after that, John, Maureen, Judy, and Grant left with the robot Don called The Engineer. Before they left, John was assured that Liam would be held without bail. His trial would be in two months, and the Robinsons planned to return in less than a week, unless they discovered some clues about Will’s whereabouts, and had to look further. At any rate, they promised to return in two weeks at the latest, with or without their son. Then they would go back if they needed to.

Penny was staying with Vijay, but Don had moved into the Robinson’s house until they returned, so Penny split her time between there and the Dhar’s, but Don worked late almost every night, so she didn’t see him very much.

Penny was sitting at a table in the visitor’s room. There were only two other couples there, as the prison held few people. Actually, it wasn’t really a prison, it was more of a jail. There just hadn’t been that many crimes in the years since the colony had been established. Either the best and the brightest just didn’t commit many crimes, or they were better at hiding them. Which was what Penny figured. But they did have one famous prisoner. They still weren’t sure what to do with her. She had confessed to her crimes, but she had also saved Will’s life, and helped him to save the colony. So they were still debating her future.

When she walked in, Penny ran to Dr. Smith and hugged her, and immediately started crying. Dr. Smith was a bit surprised, and still wasn’t really good at this, but she hugged her, patted her back uncomfortably, and waited for the girl to settle down.

Finally Penny moved back and looked at her. “I didn’t realize I missed you that much,” Penny said, surprised at her own words.

“How are you? You know, since…” Dr. Smith asked.

“I’ll survive. I’m still recovering and am pretty sore, but I won’t die from the attack at least.”

“I didn’t think he would do such a thing,” Dr. Smith said.

“I can’t talk about that, Doctor Smith. I…just…I can’t.”

“I understand. But if you need to, you can talk to me.”

“Professionally?” Penny asked, and wiped the tears out of her eyes, as she sort of laughed.

“As a friend, Penny.”

Dr. Smith led her over to a table, and they sat across from each other. “Now, tell me what’s going on. No word of Will, right?”

She almost started crying again, but she kept it in. “No. They went to try and find him.”

“Who?”

“Mom and Dad and Judy and Grant. They stayed until they knew I was okay, then they left. I’m staying with Vijay and his parents.”

“Well that’s convenient,” Dr. Smith said, and the old smirk was back, but she quickly caught herself. “When did they leave?”

“Two days ago. I just missed my family, and you’re the only family I have here now besides Don.”

Dr. Smith almost teared up at that. “Where would they go to try and find him?” Dr. Smith asked quickly, to try and hide her emotions.

“Back to the planet we were stranded on. The kids. And you. Mom wants to see the ruins of the alien city. We were sitting around at Christmas talking, and they all sort of decided that Will didn’t do anything without thinking it through. The consensus was that he might not have just decided to go wandering around the galaxy with Robot. He might have had something in mind, that he didn’t tell us.”

“Like with SAR,” Smith said.

“Yeah. Like with SAR.”

“You know, they’re right that Will is pretty thoughtful. Strategic, might be a better word. He certainly was with SAR.”

“You think so? I mean, yeah, he knew what he wanted to do, but I’m not sure he planned it all out.”

“It was planned,” Dr. Smith said.

“How do you…wait. You knew he was going to confront SAR?”

“I have another confession to make, Penny. Yes. I knew. I knew something was up with him when we were stranded. I’m good at reading people. And you know, Will was just not himself. And he finally admitted it to me. When they were going to put me in the Cryo tube, we made a deal. He would promise to release me once we got to Alpha Centauri, and I would distract your family for him while he left the colony or the ship to find SAR.”

Penny stood. Now she was furious. “I can’t fucking believe it! He almost died!”

The guard was standing by the door, and quickly walked over to them.

“It’s fine, I’m leaving!” Penny said to the guard.

“Penny,” Dr. Smith said. “Wait.”

“No! Leave me alone!”

She hurried to the door, the guard standing between her and Dr. Smith now.

“Penny!”

She turned back, but stayed by the door.

“Look in his room. All over. There’s a clue somewhere. If you find anything, come back and see me and we’ll figure it out together.”

“You’ve done enough!” As soon as she said it she remembered Judy saying the same thing to Will, when he had released Dr. Smith and she had kidnapped their mother. Will wanted to go with Judy to find her. Judy immediately felt bad about saying it. But Penny didn’t feel bad at all. She turned and left.

She drove toward the Dhar’s house, but on the way she started thinking. While it took her family longer to reach the conclusion she had reached before he even left, they were right. Will just wasn’t the type of kid to go off without a plan. And as pissed off as she was at Dr. Smith, if there was anyone she knew who could figure it out—if there was anything to figure out—it was Dr. Smith. She sighed, then headed toward their house.

Once home, she went to the kitchen and made herself some tea, then walked to Will’s room. She looked through everything. She felt a little bad about rummaging through his closet and drawers. The siblings had become really close, and talked about pretty much everything. But still, he was a fourteen year old boy, and she didn’t want to know everything he might be into. But she found nothing embarrassing, and after an hour she sat back down on the bed.

“Where are you Will?” She said. She looked at the bookshelf again. “Why that book?” She walked over and picked up the book about UFOs again. There was nothing amazing in it that she could see. Same old shit, she thought. Roswell. Project Blue Book. Area 51. But it was all she could see that might have a clue in it. And with so few books it had to have meant something to him.

“Whatever,” She said. She took it with her and left to head back to Vijay’s.

.

The next day she waited for Dr. Smith again in the visitor room. When she walked in, Penny stood and greeted her. “I’m sorry, Doctor Smith. I thought about it. I’m still pissed about what you did, but in the end, you saved Will’s life. And the colony. Will forgave you and he knew what you did. I guess I need to be a little Willish myself.”

“It’s okay, Penny. I’m still working on myself. And if it wasn’t for your brother, that never would have happened. So, the book was his? Is there a clue?”

“Not that I could see. Most of it isn’t anything I didn’t hear about before. Though, Will was always more into the whole UFO thing than I was. So I don’t know. Maybe you can find something. The thing is, he only had like three books that were hard copies. And this was one. So this must have meant something to him. Maybe you can find a clue in it.” She handed it to her.

“Give me a few days, Penny. Then come back. If there is anything here that I think might lead to where Will went, I’ll find it.”
They stood and hugged.

Penny thought she would wait a week and go back and see Dr. Smith. She didn’t really expect to hear from her, but the next night she was on her way to the Dhar’s from classes at the college, when there was a call on her radio. “Penny Robinson?” It was a woman’s voice.

“Yes.”

“This is Sandra Langford, Doctor Smith’s counselor. She would like you to stop by and see her.”

“When?” Penny asked.

“She said as soon as possible. She says it’s urgent.”

“Any chance I could see her tonight? I know visiting hours are over.”

“She’s a special case,” the woman answered. “I’ll make the arrangements.”

An hour later Penny was sitting in the visitors room when Dr. Smith walked in carrying the book Penny had left with her. “You found something?” Penny asked.

“I just might have.” She pulled her chair over to Penny’s side of the table this time, and opened the book to a chapter about two thirds of the way through.

“So this book has a lot of different UFO myths, stories and what have you, just like you said. But this one caught my eye. I had read some about it before. And I was interested enough in this that I did some research last night.”

“Research? How?”

“On the Computer. Alpha’s net.”

“They gave you access?”

“Describe, gave.”

“Okay, so what did you find?”

“I found this.” She pointed to a photo in the book.

“That looks like…a robot? Maybe?”

“So you see the same thing I do,” Dr. Smith said.

“Yeah, but, it might not be that. It just has four arms. I don’t know Doctor Smith, that seems like a reach. I think Mom and Dad have just a good a chance of finding him on the planet where the alien city was.

“I mean, he used to read this stuff when he was a little boy. I doubt he has the same interests now.”

“Yes, I’m sure you’re right. But Will wasn’t the normal little boy, was he? I bet he was never satisfied until he figured out a mystery. Whether it was a rubik’s cube or a lost civilization of aliens. So I kept looking, and I found this.” She turned to the back cover of the book, and showed Penny a drawing.

“That’s Will’s handwriting,” Penny said. “It’s…” She looked up at her, then back at the sketch. She thumbed through the pages again before turning back to the drawing that Will had done on the inside back cover. “I really hate myself for saying this, but I think you could be right Doctor Smith.”

Smith smiled her crooked smile. “Because it doesn’t matter if it really is a robot. What matters is that Will…”

“Believes it’s a robot,” Penny said. “Because he would go there to find out.”

“Exactly. And obviously Will drew on the back cover what he thinks he might find there. This wasn’t drawn when he was a small boy on Earth reading about UFOs. This was drawn after he knew what the robots were. And what the aliens looked like.”

“But what does the book say about them?” Penny reached for the worn paperback, but Dr. Smith snatched it before she could get it.

“If I tell you the story I’m just going to have to tell it all over again, when we get help.”

“What help? Help doing what? My parents are gone, and we don’t know how long before they return. And Will is….in danger.” It was draining him. “So what do we do, Dr. Smith?”

“Let me answer the first question first. We need help from someone who is not afraid to bend the rules, slightly. And is a pretty good pilot.”

“Don? Of course you’re talking about Don. Are we going to…"

“We’re going to see if we can find your brother, Penny.”

“Where?”

“It’s all in the book. If I’m right, I believe your brother did have a destination in mind. I’ll explain it once we see Don.”

“But how would we go? We have no ship, we have no Robot, we have no engine, and you’re in here.”

“What about that Robot of yours? Betty or Tracy or something.”

“Sally. And she left.”

“Well, don’t you have a connection with her. Like Will and his Robot? Just call her or whatever.”

“I don’t know,” Penny answered. “It was never like Will described his connection to Robot. I never read her thoughts or anything. It was more like, she was a friend. And then she just left.”

“You need to find better friends. But you can try, can’t you? Just get in a quiet space and think about her. Think, I need help or something.”

“Well, even if it worked…it won’t work…But even if it worked, how do you get out of here?”

“Oh, don’t worry about me, I’ve escaped a lot tougher jails that this. You do your part and let me work on mine.”

Chapter Text

As soon as they came through the rift, the planet was in view ahead of them, and they could see how damaged it was.

“That’s incredible,” John said. “That the engine could do that much damage, considering the size of it. How could it generate that much energy?”

“I have my suspicions,” Maureen said. “But it’s a tough theory to test, without blowing everything up.”

“Well, lets not do that,” John said. “I prefer remaining curious.”

“I never thought I would be back here,” Judy said, as she looked out at the debris field in front of them.

John was piloting, Grant co-piloting. “You good, John?” Grant asked.

“So far. But don’t worry. I’m not too proud to ask you for help if we get in trouble. I think I’ll come in low. It looks like the pieces that would cause the most damage are in that upper field. I’ll let the guidance system take over once we’re closer.”

“Roger that,” Grant said, then looked back at Judy. “I told you, always rely on the computers.”

“Sure you did,” Judy said, and smiled at him.

John guided them carefully toward the debris field. “Okay, Judy,” he said. “Input the coordinates for your canyon, and I’ll let the computer take over.”

“Roger, Dad,” she said. Then, “Done.”

“Okay, the mechanical brain is taking over,” John said. “We can just lean back and relax.”

“Can you really do that?” Grant asked him.

“No!” Maureen and Judy said simultaneously.

As they grew closer to the field, both John and Grant gripped the controls tighter, as the ship found it’s way through seemingly impassable pathways between the floating debris. When it was behind them, they both relaxed, and looked back where Maureen was leaning back in her seat, pretending to be asleep.

She opened her eyes, “We land yet?” She asked, innocently.

Judy gave her a grin, while John and Grant looked at each other, then shook their heads.

A little while later they were over the canyon.

“I’ll try to set it down pretty much where you were,” John said.

“This must have been a beautiful planet at one time,” Maureen said.

“Yeah. At one time,” Judy agreed. “No place like home.” She was lost in her own thoughts as they began descending into the ravine. A whole year of her life here. A year she would never forget. A year of longing to be back with their parents, and stress in keeping everyone together and safe, while the whole time, wondering if they would ever see their loved ones again. And a year of distancing from the two most important people in her life.

“No Jupiter, and no sign Will has been here,” Judy said. No one responded and she knew they had all been thinking the same thing.

“There,” she said, as their old camp came into view. “That’s where we landed the transport Jupiter.”

“I’ve got the visual,” John said. “You can still tell there was a Jupiter landing here. Though there’s some damage in this area.”

“Yeah, it looks like some of the asteroids began to make it to the surface,” Judy said. “We left just in time.”

“And we better not stay long,” John said.

“How far to the cave and the alien city?” Maureen asked.

“Maybe thirty minute walk or so. And I didn’t see the city, but Will said he and Robot were in the tunnels for almost an hour before he found it.”

Once on the ground, they piled out of the Jupiter, and stood looking at the empty camp ground. There were abandoned tents and equipment, and signs everywhere of the year the children had spent there, trying to survive without their families. Judy didn’t say anything, and they let her take a few minutes. They knew she had a lot of emotions she was dealing with. 

Maureen watched her, and thought, this was a part of her children’s lives she would never fully know about. After awhile she walked up and put her arm around her daughter. “You did an amazing thing here, Judy.”

”We did, Mom. All of us. But I made a lot of mistakes too.”

”Because you’re human. But you were in a situation that few girls your age ever have to deal with.”

”Penny’s writing about it,” Judy said. “She said she had to. We all changed that year. And I don’t think we’ll ever be the same.”

John gave them some time, then walked up on the other side of Judy and put his arm around her too. “You ready, kid? I want to get in, see what we can see and get out before there are anymore asteroid storms.” They had decided to leave The Engineer with the Jupiter. He might be able to help them figure out what they were seeing, but they weren’t sure how he would react to the alien city, or the hundreds of skeletons that Will said he had found. The robot was their only way of getting back home.

They had already packed their backpacks with everything they needed for a week, including spelunking equipment. According to Will and Penny, the tunnels were large enough they shouldn’t need it, but John tried to prepare for all possibilities, though he called them eventualities. And they had no idea how damaged the place was now.

Judy led them through the woods to the cave opening, and thirty minutes or so later they stood in front of the door that had almost slammed shut on Will.

There were strange designs on the door. Maureen walked up and traced them with her fingers. “Concentric circles,” she said. “Almost like mandalas, but these other designs, I have never seen before. I wonder if it’s a message of some kind. Or if it tells what’s inside.”

“Maybe it’s a warning,” John said.

He was looking along the wall for another way in. “Up there.”  He pointed several meters up the side of the cliff wall. “It looks like some of the rocks have fallen. Not sure if it’s a big enough to get inside. I’ll go up first.”

He climbed until he was able to look in the opening. “We can get through here,” he said. “Lots of damage. Probably a lot of it recent, when you guys were here. I really think I should do this by myself.”

“Yeah, because you’re the scientist,” Maureen said, as she began to climb up to him. She looked back down at her daughter, “But no need for you…”

“On my way up,” Judy said, and started to climb.

Above her, John and Maureen looked at each other. “Takes after you,” they said at the same time. They both gave weak smiles, then looked back to watch their eldest daughter make her way up.

They all climbed the wall, crawled through the opening, and back down until they were on the other side, standing on some type of path. There was damage everywhere. Rocks and debris had fallen from the cavern roof and the walls. The ground was covered in ash. “Hold on,” John said. He took his monitor out and tried to get a radiation reading. The needle moved slightly, but there was no alarm. “Minuscule reading,” he said. “Whatever happened, it wasn’t recent.”

“How long ago?” Grant asked.

“Before they found your ship,” Maureen said. “With this type of event I would expect radiation to be present in much greater quantities for a lot longer than seven years.”

“So, the aliens didn’t send the robots to destroy Earth,” Grant said. “They did it on their own.”

“Yes, maybe I was wrong,” Maureen said. “But then why would the robots go there as soon as they discovered where you were from? Why did they consider humans their enemies? The aliens weren’t human.”

“Maybe there was another reason they went,” Judy said.

“What?” Maureen asked.

“I…I don’t know.” It sounded like she was going to say something else. But she didn’t.

“Okay,” John said. “I’ll take the lead. Stay close and keep your eyes open, we have no idea what we’re going to find, and nothing looks stable here.”

They made their way through the tunnel, stepping around boulders and rocks that had fallen on the ash covered pathway. More than once, they had to use their gear to scale a wall to avoid some major destruction.

It took almost two hours but they were finally standing above the destroyed alien city. On the far side was an opening in the roof of the cavern, allowing light to flow in. They had all watched Will’s video, but seeing it was surreal. “Amazing,” John said.

When Maureen didn’t answer, Judy said, “Just because he isn’t here, doesn’t mean you were wrong, Mom.”

“I know. That’s what has me concerned. After seeing this, and knowing Will, I can’t believe he didn’t come right back here.”

“Yeah, but remember, we’re here to look for clues to his whereabouts,” John said. “So let’s go see if there are any.”

They made their way down toward the abandoned city, though city wasn’t really what they would have called it. “Nothing here resembles any type of domestication,” Grant said. “No individual dwellings, no communal buildings, no living structures of any kind. It’s like a…”

“Industrial plant,” John said. “Everything here seems to be designed for production.”

“The Robots,” Judy said. “They made them here.”

“Maybe,” Maureen said, “but like Grant said, there are no living quarters. Something this large would need thousands of workers. Where did they stay?”

Judy took a flare gun out of her backpack as Maureen spoke. She fired it off above the city. When the cavern was illuminated, they saw on another level below, the skeletons of the aliens.

“Wow,” Grant said.

“This is what Will saw,” Judy said. “The skeletons.”

“Well, we know where the inhabitants are now,” John said. “Let’s see if we can get down there.”

They began to make their way down from the path they were standing on. Several meters below them, they found another path. Or a road of sorts. It was much wider than the one they had been on, and the surface was perfectly flat, to the point of being smooth. Maureen knelt down and felt it. “Metal of some type. Like the door that blocked the entrance. But look how much of it there is. I have a feeling they didn’t build this place out of the natural resources of the planet. Maybe they brought it here and installed it. But I can’t imagine how that would have worked.”

“And it’s designed to move heavy equipment,” John said. “Or something. It definitely doesn’t seem like a pedestrian walkway.”

They followed the road as it curved around the perimeter of the city, winding down toward the center of it all. When they were were halfway down, John stopped and looked back up the way they had come. “This didn’t lead to the surface,” he said. “This entire place was underground. If it wasn’t for the hole in the roof of the cavern, or that door that almost slammed on Will, we wouldn’t know it was here.” He looked back up toward the opening in the top on the far side of the cavern. “I think that was caused by whatever they used to destroy this place.”

“The engine,” Judy said.

“The engine,” Maureen agreed.

The road ended in what seemed to be the center of the cavern. Then it split off into several directions. They chose the one that seemed to lead lower, thinking it would take them to the level below, where the skeletons lay scattered.

“Everything here is strange,” Grant said. “All made out of the same material this road is made of. And I think you were right John, this was an industrial complex of some kind.”

There were no actual buildings anywhere. There were tubes and pipes running every direction, connecting one metal structure to another. But there were no designs like on the outer door. No walkways other than the road they were on. “If it wasn’t for the skeletons, this would seem like there was no life here at all,” Maureen said. “Like it was a giant factory that needed no workers, no maintenance crews to keep it all running. Other than this road, there is no way for anyone or anything to maneuver around here.”

The structure was massive, and it took a couple hours for them to finally reach the end of the industrial complex, where the road seemed to go inside the wall of the cavern. They had to duck to get under the opening the aliens had made in the wall. Now they were beneath the road they had been standing on.

John took another flare gun and fired it out across the cavern. The skeletons were scattered all around below them. They looked up to see the ceiling, twenty meters over their heads. They had just been walking on the other side of it.

“This isn’t a road we’ve been on,” John said. He fired another flare. Now they could all see what he was talking about. The flat surface they had been walking seemed to be the top of a squared unit, that circled all around the entire complex against the cavern wall, and down until it disappeared somewhere in the depths below. Like a giant spiral staircase, except for the steps.

“Do you think they travel inside this?” Grant said. “Either walking or some type of transport? It’s big enough to drive a Chariot through.”

“It wouldn’t make sense to just encircle the whole place if it was meant for transportation,” Maureen said. “There’s something important inside.”

“A whole hell of a lot of something important,” Grant said. “Just what we can see probably goes on for a hundred kilometers or more around this cavern, and then it disappears below us. No telling how much more there is of it.”

“John, before we go down to the skeletons, let’s go back to where the hole in the cavern is. I want to see if this was damaged and if we can look inside it.”

“That will take a couple hours, Maureen. I think we need to get down there and get out of here.”

“I know, but I have a theory on what we’re looking at.”

“You always have a theory, Maureen. And they’re usually right. But I’m more worried about getting us out of here alive.”

“But if Will isn’t here, and so far it looks like he isn’t, then like you said, we’re looking for clues of where he might be. Something inside this is pretty important to them. I think it’s worth the risk to see what it is.”

Grant said, “I have to agree with her, John. If they aren’t originally from this planet, and they might not be, because this isn’t the planet Robot took Will and Doctor Smith to when they went to Robot’s home planet, there’s something important here.”

“Okay, we’ll do it,” John said. “Against my better judgement.”

They went back the way they had come, and made their way to the opposite side of the cavern, back through the industrial complex, until they were beneath the opening that had been made in the top of the cavern. Now they could see Maureen was right. There was a rip in the flat surface that they thought had been a road.

They had to crawl over some damage to get to the hole in the square unit, and Maureen stopped and tried to get a radiation reading, before getting too close to the damage. “It’s still nominal,” she announced.

She laid down on her stomach, leaned into the hole inside the flat surface, and shined her light inside. She leaned so far in, John grabbed her legs to steady her. After several minutes, she pushed herself back up, and John helped her stand.

“You were right, John. This protects something inside it. A tube. Actually two tubes. And something else. Conductors of some type."

“Tubes and conductors ?” John asked.

“Yes. I think I know what it is. It’s just…almost too incredible to think about.”

“What?” Judy asked.

“There are tubes running in opposite directions, circling the entire unit, and I think they meet again in the middle. There are no magnets like we would have. But they have somehow created a magnetic field. And I think it probably was used for many years. Right up until it was destroyed. But with no magnets, I don’t know how they did it.”

“Did what, Maureen?” John asked.

“I think it’s a particle accelerator. A collider. Unlike anything we could have ever done.”

“They’re smashing atoms?” Judy asked.

“Yes. Before it was destroyed in the war, our largest super collider at CERN had a circumference of twenty seven kilometers. It’s one large circular chamber that holds two tubes. The longer the tubes, the more speed you can get to smash atoms into particles. The atoms go opposite directions around the tubes until they collide. Then we see what particles we have left. This is how we proved the existence of the God Particle.

“But the longer the trajectory the atoms have to go, the faster they go, and the more energy is dispelled at contact. This could be…” she looked around the chamber, then down, where the squared unit disappeared below… “thousands of kilometers of tube. There’s no telling what particles they’ve discovered. They could have an entire different view of the universe than we have. We know they’ve learned to create a rift in space. And this confirms my suspicions. They’re probably using annihilation to create the rift.”

“Capturing antimatter?” Grant asked.

“Yes, creating antimatter, then capturing it. Like the supercolliders. The problem is, anti-matter is so hard to create, and so costly, no government on Earth would ever invest in what it would take. After almost a hundred years, we’ve only created enough anti-matter to power on a light bulb. And that costs billions of dollars.

“But this accelerator? I bet they’ve been creating anti-matter for decades. In large enough quantities to perfect the engine and create the space rift. So yes, I believe the engine is powered by annihilation. The collision of matter and anti-matter particles. And that was my suspicion, once I realized the engine could be used as a weapon of mass destruction. The amount of matter and anti matter that could be contained in an engine that size is the only thing I could imagine that could produce enough energy to create the rift, or to destroy an entire planet.

“One gram of anti-matter, when it makes contact with one gram of matter, creates as much energy as a nuclear bomb. That’s what I think they were doing on this planet.”

“Making the engines,” Judy said.

“Probably. But maybe that wasn’t everything. Maybe the were trying to understand the universe. Discovering unknown particles. Like we do. Maybe the engine was just a bi-product of that discovery process.”

“Maybe they discovered something that…” Judy started, but stopped.

“That what?” John asked.

“That SAR didn’t like,” Judy finished.

They all looked around at each other. “I think we’re grasping at straws,” Grant said. “We don’t have any idea why SAR destroyed them, or when he did.”

“I know,” Judy said. “I just have a feeling.”

“What kind of feeling?” Maureen asked.

“I don’t know. I want to think about it first,” she answered.

Maureen looked around the cavern. “One thing I am sure of, the aliens were working on particle science in ways we would never be able to. Smashing atoms, building an engine that could rip a hole in space.”

“Or a planet,” John said. “But as advanced as they are, you don’t think they would have discovered another way to create antimatter than a particle accelerator, pretty much the same way we have?”

“Well, math is still math and science is still science,” Maureen said. “They’ve figured out how to do it without magnets like we have, but they still need to generate enough energy to smash the atoms. It’s like their spaceships. Obviously much more advanced than ours, but the principals of space travel are the same. If they could teleport themselves, then I would agree with you. But they don’t. They use the same principals of space travel that we do, even the rift they create has at least been theorized by our scientists. So no, it doesn’t surprise me that they have their version of a supercollider. And obviously, like their spaceships, this is much more advanced than anything we could do.”

John looked around again at the massive cavern. “Let’s go down by the skeletons and take a look, and get out of here if we can’t find any signs that Will’s been here or clues of where he could be.”

They followed the flat surface as it wound down to the level below them, until they were surrounded by the skeletons.

“There’s hundreds of them,” Judy said.

They knelt beside several and examined them. “Will, was right,” John said. “They made the robots in their image. The four appendages, three fingers. And their feet. Almost bird like.”

“Maybe duck like,” Maureen said. “They were webbed.”

“Webbed?” Judy said. “I guess we haven’t seen enough of this planet to know how much water there is, but the canyon and river suggest it’s definitely a lot like Earth.”

John began looking around, shining his flashlight along the wall. “Over there,” he said.

They all looked toward the far wall where he shined the light. There was a flat metal surface that was maybe six meters wide and just as high. On it were drawings. They made their way across the chamber until they stood beneath it.

“Formulas, maybe.” Maureen said. “They are geometrical diagrams. This might have been some type of lab.” She lifted her wrist radio and began recording the entire wall.

“It’s like a giant whiteboard,” Judy said, glancing at John, who smiled at her.

John began shining his light along this side of the cavern, until he said, “Look over there.”

“Another tunnel,” Grant said. It was on the same side of the huge cavern, thirty meters or so from the wall they were standing in front of. It seemed to go deeper into the ground. There were more alien skeletons at the end of it.

“They were coming from down there,” Grant said. “Escaping the tunnel it looks like.”

“We don’t have time to explore that,” John said. “But I think we should anyway.”

“Seriously, Dad?” Judy said. She was ready to leave, since they had found no sign of her brother.

“Just for a while,” he answered. “No longer than an hour, then we turn around, whether we find anything or not.”

They made their way down the wall, careful not to disturb the skeletons as they stepped around them.

Once at the tunnel entrance, John shined his light down it. The circumference was big enough three men could walk side by side. “It looks like it was carved into the rock,” he said. “But, it’s perfectly round. The sides are smooth. One thing about them, they were great engineers. It slopes down, so be careful.”

As they made their way through, they continued to come upon more and more skeletons, and they all looked as if they were scrambling to escape.

It didn’t take them an hour. A little over thirty minutes of walking, the tunnel came to an end, and they stepped into a wide opening. They shined their lights all around, but couldn’t get a sense of how big it was, so John fired a flare, and they all gasped in surprise. Twenty or so meters from the tunnel entrance was a large body of water. It was so vast, they couldn’t see to the other side.

“A sea,” Grant said. “Incredible. We know some planets and moons have oceans under the surface, but we’ve never seen it before. Titan. Europa. They’re called Interior Water Ocean Worlds.”

“And we’ve hypothesized they could hold life,” Maureen added. “Earth has to be at almost precisely the right distance from the sun to support life, but interior ocean worlds don’t. They’re normally protected by thick layers of rock and ice, which helps to moderate the temperature, along with the planet’s core. Which could answer the Fermi Paradox.”

“The what?” John asked.

Maureen looked at the others. They didn’t seem to know the reference. Not even Grant. Though she suspected he may have just forgotten. Or he just wasn’t answering. And suddenly she missed her son deeply. He would have known what she was talking about, and he would have been as excited by this discovery as she was.

“Where is everybody?” Maureen said. “That was what Fermi asked. He was a physicist. If there is other intelligent life in the universe, where is it? He proposed that we should have evidence of it by now. One possible answer has been that’s it’s under the surface of Ocean Worlds, protected from sun flares, asteroids, and other cataclysmic events. Ocean world planets could actually be more conducive to life than Earth.”

“That didn’t help here,” Judy said. “Look at all the skeletons. There’s thousands.”

They were everywhere they looked along what seemed to be a black beach. It resembled black sand, but it was hard to tell with the lighting, and could just as well have been more ash. The aliens seemed to have been trying to flee the water.

“Amphibious,” Maureen said. “They were amphibious. That’s why we didn’t see any living quarters. They live under water.”

“When we were at the dam, one of the robots came out of the water,” Judy said. “I thought they were just designed to survive any environment, but maybe it was more than that.”

“What do you think happened to make them try and escape the sea?” She asked, looking at her mom. “They’re lying everywhere. It wasn’t organized.”

“I think the water was heated in the explosion,” Maureen said. “They were being boiled alive.”

John fired another flare, and none of them said anything as they looked at the thousands of skeletons of aliens lying along the shore.

Maureen held up her wrist radio and recorded the sea, the beach, and the skeletons covering it. Finally, John said, “We better get out of here.”

But Maureen walked forward and knelt beside a skeleton. She picked up it’s hand, twisted slightly, and it separated from the rest of it. She turned back to the others, who were all looking at her. “DNA,” she explained.

“Look,” Judy said, and walked toward the water, a little ways past her mother. She stopped above another skeleton. Actually there were two skeletons, though they were entangled, so it was hard to tell. The others walked over to see what she was looking at. One of the alien skeletons was large, like the ones on the level above. The other was obviously a child. The large skeleton had it’s arms wrapped around the small one, whose arms were clutched tightly around the adult.

They all stood looking at the skeletons not saying anything for several minutes.

John looked back toward the tunnel they had just come down. “They escaped the water, just to run into the flames. What a horrible way to die.”

“And if it hadn’t been for Will…” Judy said. Leaving out the rest. That everyone on Alpha Centauri would have met the same fate.

Finally Maureen said, “Other than their appearance, I think the aliens are closer to humans that we realized. All species care for their young, but they don’t have the intelligence that these aliens had. So why did the Robots destroy them, and then want to destroy humans?”

“But they didn’t kill Don when they could have,” Judy said. “I’m still not convinced they wanted to destroy all humans.”

“That’s what makes the mystery deeper,” Maureen said. “Maybe we’re thinking of this whole thing wrong.”

“How?” John asked.

“Why did Robot attack the Resolute?” Maureen asked.

“To get the engine back,” John said.

“Was that the reason?” She responded. “How do we know Robot didn’t go to the Resolute because he knew they had Scarecrow, and he wanted to free him?”

“Or for Will?” Judy asked.

“Not that far back,” Maureen said. “They didn’t know anything about Will until after he connected with Robot. Then SAR became his enemy.”

“But we really don’t know that, do we?” Judy said. “I can’t get over one thing. It was something I said when we were abandoning the Resolute when this all started. Twenty three missions traveled safely to Alpha Centauri and back, with both Scarecrow and the engine on board. Twenty three missions that were not attacked. But our’s was. And we don’t know if the robots ever wanted the engine or not. But we do know one thing. Because my brother figured it out. SAR wanted Will.”

“What are you suggesting, Judy?” Maureen said.

“I don’t know if I’m suggesting anything. I’m just thinking out loud. SAR trapped Robot to lure Will. SAR followed Will every place he went. SAR stabbed Will in the heart, and then left for Alpha Centauri, presumably to destroy it. But we don’t know that either, do we? What if there was another reason they went to Alpha Centauri, and only tried to destroy it once they saw Will had survived?”

“What other reason?” John asked.

“What did they do once they got there?” Judy asked.

They all just looked at each other, not sure what she was suggesting.

“They killed Hastings,” Judy answered her own question.

“To set up Will’s robot,” John said.

“Really?” Judy asked. “We don’t know that either, do we? And Hastings had captured Scarecrow. What if they went there to kill Hastings, and only decided to destroy the planet once they realized Will had survived? Maybe it was Will SAR wanted to kill the whole time?”

“What would make Will that important to them?” Grant said.

“Well, that’s the mystery, isn’t it?” Judy asked. “But, SAR was willing to sacrifice himself once we surrounded him. Did he hate humans so much, he would do that? Or did he hate Will that much? And by that time, Will wasn’t really special, was he? Penny connected to Sally. And a bunch of the kids connected to other robots as well.”

“If you’re right, Judy, that from the beginning it was all about Will, maybe it was because he started this…revolution,” John said. “Maybe that’s why SAR hated Will so much. But it still doesn’t explain how they would have known anything about Will when he first came to space. That’s what makes the theory hard to believe.”

They looked at Maureen for her opinion, like they normally did. When she didn’t say anything, John said, “Well, Maureen?”

“I…I don’t know,” she said. “I have to think this through. It just seems too strange.”

“Well, your son is exploring the galaxy with his best friend, an alien Robot,” Judy said. “Strange things happen all the time.”

“But why Hastings?” Maureen asked, “If not to set up Will’s Robot? Would SAR have known something about Hastings because of Scarecrow? And if so, would he have really gone to Alpha Centauri just to kill Hastings for capturing and torturing Scarecrow? A robot he ended up destroying?”

“Again, I think we’re grasping at straws, and asking questions that have no answers,” Grant said, “And since we came here to find Will, and there is no sign he’s ever been back to this planet, we need to go.”

“I concur,” John said.

They all turned to walk back up the tunnel. Judy was side by side with Grant, looking at him. When he saw her staring he said, “What’s wrong, Judy?”

She paused for a second, then said, “Nothing,” and averted her eyes. But there had been something in his voice when they mentioned Hastings she couldn’t quite figure out.

Once out of the tunnel, they crossed back to the other side of the chamber. Before heading back the way they had come, they stopped and looked once again at the room and the hundreds of skeletons in this part of the cave.

“This is what Will saw,” Maureen said quietly. “But he didn’t come back here. Maybe we were wrong all along. Maybe he just wanted to explore.”

“I don’t think so,” Judy replied. “I was talking to Penny in the hospital. She always thought Will had more in mind than just exploring the galaxy. She thought Will was trying to find his purpose. And I think she’s right. And I agree with her, that it starts by trying to figure out all the things that happened to him. And that begins with Robot. But Will had another destination in mind, I think.”

“Where?” Maureen asked.

“I don’t know,” Judy said. “That’s the problem. It’s always been the problem. Will’s smarter than we are.”

Chapter Text

Several days after she had left Dr. Smith, Penny walked out of class and across the parking lot to the Chariot. She climbed in, started the engine, but before it pulled out, someone said, “don’t go to Vijay’s Penny, go to your house.”

“Jesus Christ, Doctor Smith! You almost gave me a heart attack.” She was holding her chest, looking in the rearview mirror at the woman, who had her trademark smirk on her face.

“Sorry Penny, but I need to be discreet.”

Penny put the Chariot in gear and drove off. “How did you get out? Never mind, I don’t want to know.”

“Good decision. Plausible deniability. Any luck on contacting Betty?”

“Sally, Doctor Smith. Sally. And no. But we can get a Jupiter if we take Vijay with us. He’ll help us get the Jupiter 4. It’s reconditioned and ready to go. But without an engine and a robot, we aren’t going anywhere.”

“Well, let’s get to your house so I can lay low and try to figure it out. Why don’t you call your boyfriend and Don and have them meet us there?”

Don left work early and met Penny and Vijay at the Robinson’s house. Penny had said it was important, and they needed him to be there, but didn’t tell them why.

“So, what was so urgent?” Don asked as he walked in the front door and sat down at the table across from Penny and Vijay.

“I need your help, Don,” Penny answered. “I need you to figure out how to get us an engine, and steal the Jupiter 4.”

“You know there’s a whole hell of a lot of questions I’m about to ask, right? But let’s start with who’s us? The two of you?”

“Hi, Don.”

He didn’t even turn around. “Wow, am I having a bad dream. I could have sworn I heard…no it couldn’t be her.”

Dr. Smith sat down at the table with them. “Didn’t you miss me?” She smiled her Dr. Smith smile.

“Oh yeah. Like I miss a toothache. What the hell’s going on?”

“We’re going to find Will,” Penny said.

“Isn’t that what your parents are out doing?”

“Yeah, but I don’t think they’re looking in the right galaxy. I think he’s much closer. Well, still fifty trillion miles away. But still in the Milky Way.”

“And just why do you think this?” Don asked.

Dr. Smith tossed Will’s UFO book on the table. “Because of this.”

“So, this idea you have of where Will might have gone, was it your idea, or her idea?” Don asked, looking at Penny but nodding his head in Dr. Smith’s direction.

“Don, do you have a problem talking directly to me?” Dr. Smith asked. “I thought we were friends. After all, you rescued me from a very small container that I shared with these two. How many people can you say that about?”

“Four, including you. And I only rescued you because you happened to be sharing the container with them.”

“Well, are you interested in what I found?”

“Mildly,” he said.

But instead of talking, Dr. Smith walked to the refrigerator and started pulling things out. “I’m making a sandwich. The prison food is terrible. You kids want anything?”

“Sure,” Penny said. “I’ll help.”

“No thanks,” Don said.

“Yeah, I’ll eat one,” Vijay said. “I’ll clean up when we’re done. But that wasn’t really a prison, Doctor Smith.”

“Well, it was to me. When you can’t leave it’s a prison.”

“You left,” Penny said.

“Valid point,” She carried a sandwich over to Vijay and sat at the table across from Don, as Penny joined her.

“So what did you find?” Don asked.

“What do you two know about Sirius?” Dr. Smith asked, looking at Vijay and Don.

“Brightest star from Earth. That’s about it,” Vijay said.

“Will used to try to show me on his telescope back home,” Penny said. “He knew everything about it of course. I wasn’t that interested though.”

“Have you heard of the Dogon tribe, from Mali, West Africa?” Smith asked.

“That sounds familiar,” Vijay said around a mouthful of fake ham.

“They’re believed to be descendants of the Egyptians,” Dr. Smith said. “Which was weird because when I researched them, they didn’t live anywhere close to Egypt. Their origin story goes back thousands of years.”

“Hold on,” Don said. “I read about this when I was a kid. The fish people or something, right?”

“Don, let her tell you what she found, okay?” Penny said.

“Fine, I’ll sit here and shut up,” he said.

Dr. Smith continued. “In their origin myth, they believed the world was created by a god named Amma. Amma was both a male and female. They believed everything that makes up the universe was contained in an egg shaped shell…or something. The Dogon referred to this as Amma’s egg. According to their myth, something caused the egg to open, and everything in the universe was scattered in all directions, forming galaxies full of planets and stars. The first life forms that were created, the Dogon called the Nommos.”

“Yeah, now I remember when I heard of this,” Vijay said. “I read a book when I was a kid.”

“You’re still a kid, Vijay,” Dr. Smith said. “Can I go on?”

“Fish people,” Don muttered.

“Don,” Penny said.

“Not another peep,” he answered.

“Anyway,” Dr. Smith said, “The Dogon believed the Nommos came from a planet in the same solar system as Sirius. According to their traditions, Sirius has a companion star that is invisible from Earth. We call that Sirius B. The thing is, we didn’t know Sirius B even existed until eighteen sixty two, when a telescope was invented that was powerful enough to detect it. But the Dogon seemed to know about it a long time before that.”

“How?” Vijay asked.

“The oral traditions of the Dogon go back over three thousand years. They claimed the Nommos visited Earth and told them about this invisible planet, which we now know as Sirius B. But they said they were from another planet that orbits a different star in the Sirius system.”

“But Don’s right,” Vijay said. “The Nommos were supposedly giant fish or something. I’m sure Will didn’t actually believe they existed.”

“Well, they were supposed to be amphibious,” Dr. Smith said. “But we don’t really know what amphibious means to the Dogon. The whole fish thing came from the fact they supposedly lived in the water but could walk on the land. Remember these were oral traditions.

“The Nommos appeared in Babylonian and Sumerian myths as well,” she added. “Some Dogon elders were interviewed in the nineteen thirties by anthropologists from France. The elders said the Nommos landed in an ark that made a spinning descent, and loud noises and wind.”

“Like a spaceship, or some type of rocket,” Vijay said.

Dr. Smith pointed to a drawing in the book of a large, round vessel, that appeared to be descending from the sky to land on a rocky surface. Below it were two people who looked like natives with spears, wearing nothing but a blanket thrown over their shoulders, looking up at the vessel as it descended. “The Dogon elders drew this for the anthropologists.”

Don looked at the picture, but he didn’t say anything.

“What, Don?” Penny asked.

“Not a peep,” he replied.

Dr. Smith went on. “And, they seemed to give the Dogon other information about Earth’s solar system, that they would have no way of knowing. Like the rings around Saturn, and the fact that Jupiter has four moons.

“They’ve been performing ceremonies for centuries celebrating the cycle of Sirius A and B.”

“But they said there was another planet?” Vijay asked. “The one the Nommos come from?”

“Yes. Another planet that we have never been able to detect. But late in the twentieth century some scientists proposed there actually could be a Sirius C. And there could possibly be this third planet orbiting Sirius C.”

“The one the Dogon said the aliens were from?” Penny said.

“And if it really exits, the Nommos supposedly told their ancestors about it?” Vijay asked.

“Yes,” Dr. Smith answered. “Three thousand years before we discovered it, according to the Elders.”

“So you think Will wanted to see if this other planet existed?” Don said. “The one the Nommos are supposedly from? And we have nothing to go on but this book?”

“Well that’s what I thought,” Dr. Smith said. “And I did some more research. Most experts think it’s all bullshit.”

“Exactly,” Don said. “And the anthropologists read too much into it. They led the Elders to say things they wanted to believe. And we knew a lot about the Sirius system after Galileo invented his telescope. The Dogon could have been telling stories they had heard after that from Westerners. And Sirius is the brightest star in the sky! There’s probably hundreds of ancient tribes who worshiped it or thought they were from there or whatever.”

“Yes,” Dr. Smith said. “I read the same things. And I had pretty much decided it was a wild goose chase. But knowing about Sirius and Sirius B, wouldn’t explain how they knew about Sirius C. It was fifty years after the anthropologists talked to the Dogon that scientists decided that star and another planet could actually exist.”

“Could exist,” Don said. “Not does exist.”

Undeterred, Dr. Smith said. “So I went back and looked at the pictures in the center of the book.”

She opened to the photos and slowly thumbed through them. “This is the section with the Dogon. They are famous—for people who give a shit about tribes and people who live in grass huts anyway—for their masks. They perform ritual dances in them. Not much here, so I went back to the computer and searched Dogon rituals. And this is what I found.”

She took a piece of paper out of her pocket and unfolded it. “I printed this from the computer. It’s called a kanaga Mask. This seems to be their most popular one. Actually, it was popular all over the country of Mali up until the last time we had contact with them. Before the war.

“Supposedly, no one really knows what it was supposed to be. Some researches think it meant a connection to Earth and the Sky with the hands pointing down and up at the same time. But like I said, no one really knows. They say even the Dogon themselves seem to have lost its original meaning, even though they use it in religious ceremonies.” Don hadn’t said anything, so Dr. Smith looked at him.

He was staring at the image, his mouth open in surprise.

“And it doesn’t matter if it’s true, Don,” Penny said. “What matters is, does Will think it’s true? Because if he does, I think Doctor Smith’s theory is as good as Mom’s. I think there’s a chance he’s in this solar system, looking for the planet that the Dogon talked about. And maybe something happened to him and he’s stranded. We have to find out, Don.”

“I see you’re thinking the same thing I thought when I looked at it,” Dr. Smith said.

The image was of a elongated mask. But it was what was at the top that had their attention. A flat piece of wood extended from it vertically, and out of the wood there were arms, with flat hands on the ends. Two pointing up and two pointing down. There were four arms.

“The robots,” Vijay said.

“Maybe, or maybe not,” Dr. Smith said. “The robots were made in the image of their creators.”

Vijay looked at her. “You don’t really think…”

“Show him the drawing in the back, Doctor Smith,” Penny said.

“After I found this, I went back to Will’s book. There were no photos of the kanaga mask in it. So I turned to the back.”

She flipped to the back cover, and there, in pencil, in Will’s childish scrawling, was a drawing of the kanaga mask. Next to it was a drawing of a robot, in it’s original form. Four limbs extended. And next to that, another drawing of a being with four limbs, but with the skull of the aliens that Will had discovered in the cave.

“You think…” Don said.

“I think he went to the Sirius system to see if the third planet existed, because he thought the aliens may come from there. The aliens who created the robots. And there is more to those masks than I told you. No one is supposed to know what they mean. Which could be how the Dogon want it. It seemed to me to be too important to them to just say, no one knows what it was supposed to mean, and yet for thousands of years, they use it in their religious ceremonies. So I kept digging. Their entire religion is tied to cosmology, and the star system they believe their gods came from. They have several levels of initiates. Very few initiates reach a level where they are taught everything.

“To most of them, the kanaga mask represents a mythical hunter who killed some kind of bird. But to the inner circle, so to speak, it represents the Nommos, their god, Amma, and the creation of the universe. The god has four hands. Two pointing down to the earth, and two hands pointing up to the sky. Where they came from.”

Don said, “But Will wouldn’t try to fin…” he stopped, looked from the drawing back to Dr. Smith, then to Penny. “He would, wouldn’t he?”

“He would, Don,” Penny said. “I think my parents are right. Will did have a plan. And they were right in thinking it had something to do with the aliens. But they were wrong about where he went. Once again, Will was smarter than all of us. He may have figured out where they came from. And even if he didn’t, he may have gone there to see for himself.”

“So we need the Jupiter 4 and an engine,” Doctor Smith said.

“And an engine and a Jupiter won’t help you without a robot to take you through the rift,” Don replied.

“Yeah, that’s still a problem,” Penny agreed. “I’ve talked to everyone I can from the 24th group. But the robots have minds of their own now, and it doesn’t sound like any of them are in a hurry to help us. They don’t even seem to remember their programming or the aliens who made them.”

“And Sara?” Dr. Smith asked.

“Sally!” Penny said.

“Whatever.”

“No,” Penny replied. “I’ve tried to reach out to her, but I just don’t have the same connection to her that Will had…has…with Robot.”

“I would figure out how to get an engine,” Don said, “And the Jupiter 4. But I just got out of jail and I’m in no hurry to go back.”

“Don!” Penny said. “It’s Will!”

“Unless…I’m piloting.”

“Really? You would do that?” Penny asked.

“I’m bored, Penny. Besides, we’re family. Yes. If I steal a Jupiter and an engine, I’m the pilot.”

Penny stood up and rushed over and hugged him.

“And you knew I would say that, didn’t you?”

“Judy told you to take care of me, didn’t she?” Penny asked.

“So did your parents. But I thought you said you never wanted to go back to space.”

“I don’t. But it’s for Will.”

“I could go and come back,” he said. “I don’t believe I’m saying this, but Doctor Smith and I could go and come back. No need for you to go. That is, if we can find a robot that will do it, or you can still get in contact with your girl.”

“No,” Penny said. “For Will I have to go. He would go for me.”

“To be fair, your brother would probably do it to rescue a cat.”

He would, Penny thought. Because he’s the kindest person in the world. And it was draining him.

Chapter Text

Don had no luck trying to find a robot that would take them to try and find Will, but it turned out he didn’t have to. The night after they had met to discuss their plans, Penny was asleep when she was awakened by a mechanical female voice. “Trouble Penny Robinson.”

She opened her eyes, saw the whirling white lights above her, and nothing else. She screamed and jumped up on the opposite side of the bed. Once she realized Sally was standing there she said, “Sally! You’re back!” She ran over and hugged the robot. “Did you know I needed you?”

“Yes, Penny Robinson.”

“Thanks Sally. But…we really have to work on how you make these entrances. Okay?”

“Yes, Penny Robinson.”

They left the following night. Don had bribed the security guard at Alpha with two bottles of forty year old scotch and six Koby steaks. He still had quiet an inventory stashed away, and thought once the Resolute 2 was operational, he would recruit some sources from among the crew and go back into business.

And though he would never mention it to the Robinsons, he was even considering going back to work as a mechanic on board, and running his old operation himself, instead of recruiting others.

In the beginning it was all about the opportunity and the money. But not anymore. He didn’t really need the money here on the colony, and he had a very important position now, working side by side with Maureen. And as much as he enjoyed that, he missed the rush of his previous life.

When they lifted off in the Jupiter 4, there was a momentary glitch with the security cameras, and the radar and communications went down at the same time. While that would normally bring an emergency response, the captain of the guard quickly overrode the system, and the Jupiter left the atmosphere undetected.

Don had smuggled Penny, Sally, and Dr. Smith aboard the afternoon before, and as soon they felt the ship lift off, they joined Don in the cockpit.

“Where’s Vijay?” Penny asked. The Jupiters were all in a staging area, awaiting reconditioning, or to be put back in service, and Vijay had been left outside the gate, making sure no one came in while Don was preparing to launch. He was supposed to watch until Don called him, then he would quickly make his way to the Jupiter 4 in his family’s Chariot and join them.

“He’s at the gate, making sure no one is coming in,” Don said.

“You left him?” Penny asked.

“Yep. If we find Will and bring him back, we’ll all be fine. Your brother is like the Defender of the Realm around here. No one wants to lose him. But if we come back without him, we stole a Jupiter and an engine. And that’s serious. I figured, they know us. I’m a smuggler and Doctor Smith is a convicted felon. They would expect it from us.”

“What about me?” Penny asked.

“Seriously? You’re a Robinson.”

“Good point.”

“But Vijay is probably going to follow his dad into politics. He doesn’t need this on his record.”

“He’s going to be so pissed,” Penny said, sitting in the co-pilot’s chair.

“You think I did the wrong thing?” Don asked.

“No. But he’s still going to be pissed.”

“Can we stop talking about your boyfriend, Penny?” Dr. Smith said. “I’m getting bored.” She had taken the navigation seat.

“You know, you’re always going to be that Doctor Smith too, aren’t you?” Don said.

“She’s right, though,” Penny said. “We have things to do.”

“You have the coordinates to the Sirius system?” Dr. Smith asked.

“Yes,” Don said. “Sending them to you now. You too Penny, so you can give them to your robot when we’re ready.” He pressed his wrist radio, and Dr. Smith received the message and began entering them into the computer in the navigation console.

“Next stop, space station to pick up the engine,” Don said. Once they had found the engines were capable of destroying the planet, it was forbidden to bring any to the surface. The ones they had from the robot ships that had stayed on Alpha were all kept at the space station where the new Resolute was being built.

“You should tell your robot to go down to the garage,” Don said to Penny. “The engine is supposed to be at our docking station. He…she, can grab it and head to the engine room and get ready to take us through the rift.”

“I can hear you, Don West,” Sally said.

They all looked at her. She stood for a second, then turned and walked from the cockpit, presumably heading down to the garage.

“Did you teach her that?” Don asked Penny. She was sitting there with a smile on her face. The smile of a proud parent who’s child had just said something cute.

“No. But I like her more and more,” Penny said, and stood up. “I better go with her just in case.”

“Okay but don’t leave the ship,” Don said. “If the engine isn’t there, the guard got busted.”

But when they docked, the engine was right where the captain of the guard had told them it would be. Sally stepped out of the garage, walked down the ramp, picked it up, and carried it to the engine room, with Penny following.

Sally sat the engine on the deck, placed her hand on it, and Penny watched it power on. The robot walked a few feet away and stood waiting while the blue electrodes slid from the engine and coiled around themselves, forming a loop that encircled Sally’s head. Other electrodes slid across the deck and up the wall and into the control panels. Sally grabbed two hand grips that had formed on the coiled electrodes, looked at Penny and said, “Ready, Penny Robinson.”

Penny walked up and hugged her. “Will you know when it’s time to go through the rift?”

“Yes, Penny Robinson.”

Now that they had witnessed the power of the engine, they understood why they needed to be in space, and far from the planet’s atmosphere before opening the rift. Sally had calculated that it would be forty hours before they could reach the “safe zone.”

Maureen was more cautious, and had told them they planned to travel five days from the solar system before opening the rift to go back to the planet where the kids had been stranded. So they would be at least ten days in space, and whatever time it took them to explore the caves and the underground city. When Sally had told them it would be no more than forty hours to reach the safe zone, Don said he thought it was possible to be back before Maureen and her party, which was their hope.

Penny lifted her wrist radio up so Sally could see it. “These are the coordinates.”

The robot bent her head to look at them.

“Okay?” Penny asked.

“Yes.”

Penny hugged her. “Thank you. For coming back. We have to find my brother. Okay?”

“Yes, Penny Robison.”

After the Jupiter 4 launched from the Space Station and was well outside the Planet’s atmosphere, Don stood up from the Pilot’s chair, looked at Penny and said, “Okay, time for practice.”

“But I don’t care about learning how to fly a Jupiter,” Penny said.

“Your sister and your brother know how to pilot a ship,” Don said. “Time for you to learn. You never know when you’re going to need the skills.”

“Fine.” She took a seat, and though she really had no interest, it wasn’t long before she was enjoying it, and Don made her practice much of the time they travelled.

Towards the end of the second day, Don came back from the engine room and said, “Get buckled in, Sally’s going to take us through the rift in a few…” but before he finished, they felt the static electricity that they all knew now was the opening of the rift. “Hold on!” Don said.

They gripped their seats, as the lighting seemed to change from white to blue, then back again and the ship began shuddering. A couple minutes later, everything quieted down.

“I don’t think I’ll ever get used to that,” Penny said, as the strange lighting cleared, and the ship stopped shuddering.

“Is that Sirius?” She asked, looking at the planet in front of them through the window.

“Yes, just like the charts,” Don said. “It’s twice the size of our sun.”

“The Dog Star,” Dr. Smith added.

Penny and Don glanced at her, surprised. “Well, without Maureen or Will here, someone had to learn the details,” she said. “That small dwarf is Sirius B.”

“But what about the third star?” Penny asked. “Is there one?”

“Yes, Penny Robinson.” They looked up to see Sally had walked on the flight deck.

“Where?” Penny asked.

She pointed toward the large sun, Sirius A.

“Past it?” Don asked.

“Yes, Don West.”

“Does she just know?” Don asked.

“When Maureen and John were on Robot’s crashed ship, it began to power on,” Dr. Smith said. “And a star chart opened. The planet we had crashed on was visible, and from there, Maureen could figure out how far we were from Earth.”

“So, it’s probably no different than us,” Don said. “If they’ve charted it, they’ll have it mapped. And who knows how much they’ve charted? We don’t even know how old they are. Maybe they’ve been everywhere.”

“Everywhere is a bold statement, considering the size of the universe,” Dr. Smith said.

“Maybe they don’t have to go everywhere, to know,” Penny said. “Will says that a couple of times he could connect with Robot when he was connected to the engine. And he saw, like a star map open up in Robot’s mind. Will thinks once they enter the rift, they can see a lot more than they could before. So maybe that’s what happened.”

“Or she knows about this system,” Dr. Smith said. “After all, if Will is really here looking for signs of them, maybe the robots know about this place.”

“I don’t know,” Penny said. “Robot knew about the planet he came from when you guys went back there, but none of them could find Alpha Centauri without us.”

Don charted a course to go past Sirius and after several hours, they stood up from their seats and approached the window. “Sirius A and B is behind us,” Don said. “We’re on the other side.”

“And there is it is,” Dr. Smith said. “The third star. Sirius C. And there are two planets. One small planet, with two moons, I guess, and that one further out, with one moon.”

“First things first,” Don said. “Charting a course for the closest one. Should be half a day to enter the orbit. We’ll drop into the atmosphere and should be able to get a reading if there’s a Jupiter there. We’ll pick up the MDS.”

“What’s that?” Penny asked.

“The Modular Data System. It’s like a black box for the Jupiters. Recording everything from lift off. And when a ship lands, there’s a sensor sending signals into space. Even without power, the auxiliary battery will send the signal for a couple of years. The signal isn’t going to get out of the ionosphere, but if we’re in the atmosphere, we can make a couple orbits and see if we pick it up. If not, we’ll try them in order of closest to furthest, before we actually attempt to land on either of them.”

A few hours later they entered the orbit of the closest planet. And it wasn’t long before they realized it was something different.

“Are they Dinosaurs?” Dr. Smith asked, standing and hurrying to the glass as they cruised above the surface.

“It’s beautiful,” Penny said, as she joined her. “I hope Will got to see this.” The planet was covered with vast forests, low hills, and swamps. The animals they were talking about seemed to live in the swamps or near them. They were as tall as Brachiosaurus, though they moved more like giraffes.

“Well, they’ve adapted to the atmosphere, somehow,” Don said. “But we can’t breath it.”

“But we found a planet in the Sirius system that has alien life,” Penny said. “What if Will’s right?”

“Then he’s going to be more famous than he already is, if he’s here,” Dr. Smith said.

They orbited the planet and searched for any sight of the Jupiter 2, but there was no sign of it, and they never picked up the sensor from the Modular Data System.

“Well, we better check out the other planet,” Don said. “We can be there tomorrow.”

When Penny didn’t answer, Dr. Smith and Don looked at each other. “Penny, we knew he might not be here,” Don said.

“I know,” she said, but nothing else.

“Penny, if we can’t survive in this atmosphere, it’s probably the wrong planet anyway,” Dr. Smith said. “If Will believes the aliens visited Earth from this system, my guess is they need a planet with Earth’s atmosphere.”

“And by the distance from that other planet’s sun, and the moon, I’m guessing there’s a better chance that’s the one,” Don said.

Penny still didn’t answer, she just sat back down and stared out the window.

When they were close to the second planet the following day, Don said, “Good news. The readings show this atmosphere is much closer to Earth’s. Gravity too. A better chance for human life.”

“I hope so,” Penny said.

“Okay, entering orbit in twenty two minutes,” Dr. Smith said.

It didn’t take long. As soon as they dropped beneath the ionosphere, Don picked up the signal. “He’s here!” He said.

“Seriously?” Penny said, standing and rushing to the glass. Dr. Smith joined her.

“Yes, Jupiter 2 signature, signal every twenty seven seconds. Just like a homing beacon. Let’s go find your bother. I’m charting toward the MDS. Keep your eyes peeled.”

They flew low across the surface for over an hour. The planet had a rich landscape. “It could be Earth,” Dr. Smith said. “Mountains, canyons, desserts, and rivers.”

“Which means someplace there’s got to be oceans,” Don said.

“There! There! Don, I see it!” Penny was pointing excitedly out the glass, “at ten o’clock.”

“That’s the Jupiter 2 alright,” Don said. “There’s no place like home.”

“Will, can you read me?” Dr. Smith called over the microphone. In her excitement in seeing the ship, Penny had completely forgotten to try and reach Will on her Comm.

“Will Robinson of the Jupiter 2, this is Doctor Smith of the Jupiter 4. Can you read me?”

“Do you think he’s alright?” Penny said, looking back at Don.

He didn’t answer her. “Buckle in,” he said. “I’m bringing it down as close as I can. He did a good job here. The ship sits on high ground so he can get a visual all around.”

Once on the ground, they all unbuckled, and Don said, “Let me go first,” but Penny was already out of her chair and running toward the elevator, Dr. Smith close behind. Don ran to catch up with them.

When they were in the garage, they saw Sally was already there. As soon as the ramp was down. Don said, “Let me go…” but Penny was already running down the ramp, with Smith and Sally following her. “Yeah, go ahead. I’m just the Admiral.”

Penny ran the short distance to the Jupiter 2. The ramp was down, and she ran up it, hit the control to open the hatch, ran inside and yelled, “Will! Will!”

The ship was quiet. Penny rushed to Will’s bedroom but it was empty. She checked all the other cabins but he was nowhere to be found. “I’m going down to the engine room,” she said, and hurried toward the elevator, but as she ran by the infirmary, she glanced inside and saw her brother lying there on a bed, eyes closed.

She stopped, and Dr. Smith and Don almost ran into her.

“Will?” She said quietly.

She hurried over to the bed. She stopped and looked at Don and Dr. Smith. “What happened to him?”

He was lying on the bed, flat on his back. His hands and legs were spread wide, as if they were bound to the bed, but there were no restraints. The strangest thing was that his shirt had been cut open, and his chest was left exposed. They could see no injuries, but he was clearly not well. He was pale white, and so skinny his ribs were visible, and his skin looked almost shriveled.

“What happened to him?” Penny whispered again.

She leaned over him, “Will? Will, honey, are you okay?” She patted his face, leaned close and put her cheek close to his mouth and nose. “He’s breathing.” It was so shallow it was hard to tell by watching his body.

Don was on the other side of him with Dr. Smith. “Check him for injuries,” he said, “but don’t move him. We don’t know how badly he’s been hurt.”

“Someone cut his shirt open,” Penny said. “Why?”

“Sally,” Dr. Smith said, turning to the robot who was standing in the doorway. “Can you try and find Robot?”

“Yes, Doctor Smith.” The robot turned and left the room.

Don was checking Will’s vital signs while Penny searched everywhere for more injuries, but he just seemed to be unconscious. The torn shirt bothered her. It didn’t make any sense.

Penny leaned close and kissed Will on the forehead, then said quietly, “what happened to you, little brother?”

“Penny?” Will whispered. He opened his eyes. “Penny!”

He tried to reach up to hug her but was too weak. She saw him try and immediately leaned down and put her arms around him and hugged him gently, afraid of hurting him. “Don’t move, Will, Just lie there, okay?”

He didn’t answer, he just let her hug him. Finally she raised up and looked at him.

“Will, what happened to you?”

“I fell asleep, I think.” He said it almost as if he had just drifted off while watching a movie back home on Earth and she was waking him to go to bed.

“No, you’re in the infirmary. And your shirt’s been cut open. Did Robot do that? Where’s Robot?”

“I don’t know,” he answered, he was slowly able to move his arm, and rubbed his chest above his heart. “I don’t remember. I think we just landed and I fell asleep.”

“Did something happen to you?” Don asked. “Did Robot bring you in here?”

“I don’t remember. I don’t know. Where is he?” Will still hadn’t moved other than to rub his chest, and his eyes were still barely open.

“Sally went to look for him,” Dr. Smith said. “I’ll go see if I can help.” She squeezed Will’s arm and turned and left the room.

“Who’s Sally?” Will asked.

“My Robot,” Penny said.

“Your robot?” He said. “Do you have a Robot too?”

“Will, from the battle. Remember?”

“I don’t know. Ah…yeah okay. Yeah. The robot you saved. I remember.”

“But you don’t remember what happened to you?” Don asked.

“No. We went to this other planet, then we came here. I remember waking up and Robot was worried about me.” He yawned. “I don’t remember why. I think I had a bad dream. He had his hand on my chest…” He stopped and yawned again. “…and I remember telling him everything would be okay. And then I woke up here now. And you were here.” He smiled up at his sister. 

“So maybe he brought you in here?” Penny said, taking his hand. “He knew this was where sick people go.”

“Yeah, I guess. Maybe.”

“Your arms and legs Will, it’s like you were strapped down.”

Will now noticed his arms and legs were splayed out. He brought them together slowly. “Sore,” he said reaching down and rubbing his legs.

Don turned and looked in a drawer behind him, then in two others, then looked at Penny. She saw the concern in the glance, but she wasn’t sure what he was looking for.

“How do you feel now?” Don asked.

“I think I’m okay. Just weird. I wish I could remember what happened.” He rubbed his chest above his heart again.

“Is your heart okay?” Penny asked. “You’ve rubbed it a couple times.”

“Yes, I’m not in pain or anything. Just kinda like pressure. But I think I’m fine.” He started to move.

“No,” Don put his hand on his shoulder. “Stay here with Penny, I’m going to see if I can help Doctor Smith and Sally find Robot. But don’t get out of bed yet.”

“Okay,” Will said. He sounded sleepy.

As Don walked from the room, he gave Penny a look. She waited a few seconds then called “Oh Don!” She looked at her brother. “I forgot to tell him something, stay here okay?”

“Uh huh,” he mumbled.

“Promise?” She said.

“Promise,” he said. His voice was still low, and he was just staring at the ceiling now.

Penny rushed out and found Don waiting down the hall. She knew he wanted to talk to her in private.

“What happened to him?” Penny whispered. “He’s almost shriveled. His skin. And pale white.”

“I don’t know. Something, though. And I think you’re right. He was strapped down. The restraints are gone. That’s what I was looking for. They’re not on the bed frame or in the drawer behind it, that’s where they’re kept in case a patient needs to be controlled. But they aren’t there.”

“It had to be Robot, didn’t it?” Penny asked.

“I don’t know, but we need to find him. Go stay with your brother. Call me if anything happens. But don’t let him out of bed.”

Penny turned and headed back to the infirmary and Don went to the ladder.

When he was in the engine room, he found Dr. Smith, sitting on the floor with Robot’s head.

“Oh shit,” Don said. “Now we know something happened to him.”

“Sally went to look for the rest of him,” Dr. Smith said. “She said she can fix him if she finds the pieces. What do you think happened, Don?”

“I don’t know, but we need to find Robot and get the hell out of here.”

“Yeah, let’s go see if we can help her,” Dr. Smith said. She laid Robot’s head gently on the deck where she found it and they went to the garage and out the hatch. As soon as they walked out, they saw Sally, carrying one of Robot’s arms and one of his legs back toward the ship.

They hurried out and met her. “Trouble, Don West,” she said.

Don and Dr. Smith looked out and saw Robot’s other leg and arm and torso. It looked like he had been dismembered and strewn out on the ground a hundred yards or so from the Jupiter.

“Here, I’ll take those,” Don said, “You go get the torso, it’ll be a lot harder to carry.” He took the arm and leg, and headed back into the engine room, while Dr. Smith followed Sally back out to pick up the rest of Robot.

Once they had all the pieces in the engine room, they helped Sally put them together, then something long and thin extended from one of her hands, and she inserted it in the top of Robot’s head. The face shield powered on, and red lights appeared, then quickly turned white and began moving. Electrodes began to slide out of all the disassembled parts of his body, and move towards each other. As they connected, the lights came on everywhere, and the pieces moved together, pulled by the electrodes like magnets attracted to metal.

As the pieces began interlocking, Robot’s face shield turned bright red. “Danger Will Robinson,” he said, and quickly pushed himself up and walked out of the room. Don and Dr. Smith hurried to catch up.

Robot walked into the infirmary.

“You found him!” Penny said.

Robot moved to Will, who looked up and smiled. The smile was weak, but he was obviously happy to see his friend. “Hi, Robot,” he said.

“Danger Will Robinson.” Robot announced.

“I’m okay now, Robot,” Will said.

“Danger Will Robinson,” he said again. This time he placed a hand on Will’s chest, above his heart.

“Is something wrong with his heart, Robot?” Penny asked, now more concerned.

But Robot didn’t answer. He just stood with his hand on the boy’s chest for several minutes, the lights in his face shield swirling the entire time. Finally he said, “No, Penny Robinson,” and removed his hand.

“Where were you?” Penny asked.

“He was out front, walking this way,” Dr. Smith quickly said.

Don looked at her, wondering why she was lying. But Robot didn’t say anything.

“What happened, Robot?” Will asked. “I fell asleep, and I guess you brought me here. Was something wrong with me?”

Robot still just stood silently.

“Do you remember?” Will asked.

“No,” he said.

“No? Robot doesn’t remember either?” Penny asked.

“Hey, why are you here?” Will asked. “Is it Christmas yet?”

Penny sat down beside him on the bed and took his hand. “Will, it’s almost February. You’re a month late. We came and found you.”

“A month? That can’t be. It was five days until Christmas when we landed.”

“It’s been that long, Will,” Penny said.

“How did you find me?” He asked.

“The book. Doctor Smith figured it out. I took her the book on UFOs from your bedroom and she found the drawing in the back. The one that looked like the aliens.”

Something flashed in his eyes. He quickly averted his look.

“What, Will?”

“I don’t remember the book,” he said. “I don’t know why we came here.”

“Robot, do you remember?” Dr. Smith asked.

He looked at her, but didn’t answer at first. The lights in his face shield swirled. Finally he said, “No.”

“But something happened,” Penny said. “You’ve been gone a month longer than you were supposed to be. It looks like the ship is okay, and you’re lying here like someone placed you here. You can’t remember anything?”

“No,” her brother answered. “Can we go home now?”

Penny looked at the others, who just looked back, confused.

“Can we, please?” Will asked again. He sounded almost like he was begging.

Penny brushed his hair back and smiled at him. “Yes. You think you’ve had enough of space travel for while, little brother?”

“Yes.”

“Until Easter?” She joked, still smiling.

He didn’t smile back, but he looked directly at her and said, “If you get me back to Alpha Centauri, I’m never going to get on a spaceship again, Penny.”

“Well, we’ll see,” she was still smiling.

“Ever,” he said. “I mean it.”

Now Penny was really worried. This was so unlike her little brother. Well, at least for the last couple of years. It was much more like the little boy who was so frightened of going to space. Frightened of everything, actually. And she didn’t know if he had really forgotten whatever it was that had happened to him, or if he just didn’t want to remember.

“But Will…”

Dr. Smith interrupted Penny.  “Once you get home, you never have to leave again, Will. Okay?”

“Yeah. Okay. I don’t want to. I want to go back to school and just…be normal. Can I do that Penny? Please?”

“Yes, Will. Of course you can. Of course. You deserve that more than anyone I know.”

“Doctor Smith,” Don said. “Can you pilot the Jupiter 4 with Sally, and I’ll take the Jupiter 2 with Penny and Will and Robot?” Don asked.

Sally was standing in the doorway, silently watching everything.

“Does that work, Sally?” Dr. Smith asked.

“Yes, Doctor Smith,” she answered.

“Okay. Let’s get out of here then,” she walked over and hugged Will, then left the room, following Sally to the Jupiter 4.

“Doctor Smith,” Penny said. The woman turned and looked back at her.

Penny rushed up and hugged her. “Thank you Doctor Smith. We never would have found him without you.”

Dr. Smith was still uncomfortable with the contact, but she let Penny hug her, then said, “I’ll see you kids back on Alpha Centauri.”

“Doctor Smith,” Will said. “Thanks.”

She smiled at him, then turned and led Sally away.

“Okay, you guys get ready to lift off,” Don said. “Robot, you ready?”

“Yes.” He walked over and placed his hand on Will’s chest once again. Will just smiled up at him.

As Don and Robot turned to leave, Will said to Penny, “Can you stay in here with me?”

He sounded so young again. She leaned over and hugged him. When she raised up she said. “Of course. I planned to. Hey, I’m not going anywhere, baby brother. I promise.”

He smiled.

“What?” She asked.

“You called me baby brother.”

She smiled back. “Yeah, I guess I did.”

Chapter Text

I’m smaller. That’s what Will was thinking. He wasn’t asleep, so he wasn’t dreaming. He was just thinking. And the thought that kept coming through was just that: I’m smaller.

He didn’t even know what that meant. It wasn’t his physical size. It was just…everything about him. It had been reduced somehow. Like part of him had been taken. He felt it had something to do with his missing time on the planet.

They had checked the digital log. It kept recording data, even if there was no one to personally log a message. They had arrived five days before Christmas, and the ship didn’t move again until Penny came and rescued him January 23rd. A month later.

Penny rescued him. Of course it wasn’t just Penny. Don and Dr. Smith were there. And it was Dr. Smith who figured it out. But in Will’s mind, Penny rescued him. And that was something he would never forget.

Something bad had happened to him, even though he had no memory of it. And whatever it had been, he had lost all hope of ever seeing his family again. All hope of anything. And it wasn’t as if he had given up, it was as if it had been taken from him. And then he opened his eyes and she was there. His kind, sarcastic, wonderful, loving sister. Whispering his name. Asking if he was okay.

And since they had come back, he found himself clinging to her. He spent the first day in the hospital. Don was there most of the time, until he went back to Alpha to make sure the robots hadn’t done any damage. Penny stayed by his side the whole day with Vijay, and when he left, she slept in a chair next to his bed all night. He was malnourished, and they had pumped fluids into him and ran a battery of tests, but he seemed fine, other than the weight loss, so they sent him home the next day.

For the next four days he wouldn’t let Penny out of his sight, until time to go to bed. And at night he couldn’t sleep at all. When he was younger they would sleep together often, and they still took naps together, but Will knew it was weird at their age, so he never asked. But he wanted to.

Then the previous evening she told him she was going out with Vijay. Don was there so Will wouldn’t be alone. When Penny told him she was going out, he said he hoped they had a great time, but as soon as they left, he began to sulk. Don tried to get him to play video games or something with him, but he just said he was tired and wanted to go to bed early. Robot was standing by his door when he walked to his room, but Will didn’t even acknowledge him. He was angry and lonely and he couldn’t believe Penny would have just left him.

But then he realized, this was the future. His sister was getting older. She had Vijay. It was no longer the two of them. And that was the way of the world. You grow up. You move on. You leave the people behind that meant everything to you. You forget who you were. Oh, you remember the things you did, but they no longer exist. They are in the past. That mystical place you can never return to. And when you remember those things you did, it’s like watching an old movie over and over again.

Now he was lying on his bed, looking up at the ceiling, thinking that everything had changed. Everything always changes. Time is sorrow. He didn’t know where that thought came from, but he knew it was true.

He could hear the rain outside, and normally, that would make him get up and look out the window, if not go outside just to be in it. The whole family knew his affinity for rain. The storms on Alpha Centauri could be dangerous, but, there would be a warning blasted over everyone’s comm if they were supposed to stay inside. There had been no warning, but still, he didn’t move. His mind was blank. He had been practicing doing that at night, once Penny had gone to bed. Just lying in his room with the lights out, trying to think of absolutely nothing at all. Hoping he would eventually fall asleep.

It wasn’t easy to do. His mind wandered constantly, something his sisters had pointed out to him his entire life. When everyone would be in the same room, watching a movie or playing a game, and he suddenly just wasn’t there. “Ground control to Minor Will,” Penny would say. And usually he would snap out of it pretty easily. But now, he didn’t want his mind to wander at all. He wasn’t sure where it would go. So he did everything he could to be present and absent at the same time.

Let the world go on without me, if Penny doesn’t want to be around me. I’m still here. I’ll just, pretend I’m not and maybe you’ll go. And for God’s sake, do not ask me what happened.

The thing was, he didn’t know what happened. And no matter how many times Penny or Don or Dr. Smith had tried to ask him, he just couldn’t remember. And…he didn’t want to remember. He didn’t know why, and he didn’t care why, all he knew was whatever had happened to him in his missing weeks, it was in the past, and there was no reason digging up the past. Let sleeping dogs lie.

But it wasn’t just what had happened to him that made him decide he never wanted to go back to space. It was that call of something. That thought that he needed to just keep going and never return. That was one thing he could remember. How it had pulled at him.

It had gotten so bad, once they had landed on the second planet, he wasn’t sure he could escape it if he ever went back to space. And so, he felt the only thing he could do was stay here, with his family, and move on. Try to forget all of the strange things that had happened to them over the past three years, just like he had forgotten what happened to him on that planet. It was actually comforting, to not know what happened. And so, he did everything he could to make his mind blank. To reach that comfort zone. And anything that brought him back seemed dangerous to him. Even Robot. So he ignored him.

“Will?” Penny, knocking on the door. Again. There’s one girl who will not let a sleeping dog lie.

“Will?”

Pretend to snore. That will work.

That would never work. Not with Penny.

“Will, can I come in?”

He sighed. Cheerful voice. You can do it. “Sure.”

The door opened and she walked in, sat next to him on the bed. “Will, it’s raining out. Not a bad rain, like last time. A nice rain. Will you go for a walk with me? The doctor said you need to start getting some exercise and get your strength back.”

She would never go for a walk in the rain before. She hates the rain. I’m a ‘sunny day kinda girl’ she would say, “I’m really tired, Penny.”

“Tired? But you’ve been in here all day. It’s almost three PM. Are you mad at me for something?”

“No! I just don’t think I feel very well.”

“I’ll call the Doctor and see if we can get you in. Once Judy get’s back, she can take a look at you,” Penny said.

Shit. Should have known better. “No. Don’t call the doctor, and don’t bother Judy when she comes back. I’m sure she has more important responsibilities.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing. But I’m fine.”

“You aren’t even close to fine, baby brother. You’ve been back at the house for four days, and your emotions are all over the place. And since I went out last night, this is all you’ve done.” She realized she might be speaking harshly, so she softened her tone and put a hand on his arm. “If it bothered you, you should have told me. I would have stayed home, Will. You’re the most important person in my life.”

“It’s not that! I’m just real tired is all.”

Penny sighed. She laid down beside him.

“Don’t Penny, please. I just want to be alone for awhile.” If she’s going to leave me, I need to work on being by myself.

She raised up and looked at him. “Will, we always lie down together.”

“Don’t you think we’re a little old for that?” He asked.

“It’s not anything weird, if that’s what you think,” she said.

“I didn’t mean that, I just think we’re getting a little old to be comforting each other anytime we have a bad dream or a bad thought or something. We need to grow up and get on with being adults.”

“Well, it’s not like we’e lived our lives like normal kids. But I’m almost nineteen. Which makes me an adult, you’re fourteen, which means you’re still a kid.”

He could tell it made her angry. “I’m sorry Penny. I just want to be alone.”

“Don’t fucking worry about it!” She stood up and stomped out, slamming the door behind her.

Robot was waiting outside his bedroom. For some reason, Will had asked him to stay outside now, instead of going in his room with him. “Your friend is a pain in the ass, Robot,” Penny said, as she stomped by.

“Help Will Robinson,” Robot said.

Penny stopped. She turned back to Robot, walked up and hugged him. She looked in his face shield. “Can you remember anything that happened to the two of you?”

He just looked back at her, his lights swirling.

“You know, you’re right. Will never gives up on any of us, and I’m not going to give up on him. Thank you, Robot.”

She walked back to Will’s door. She knocked twice and said, “Will, I’m coming in.”

When she pushed the door open he was still lying in bed, looking up at the ceiling. She walked over and plopped down beside him.

“So, I guess you’re just going to do whatever you want?” He said.

“You’re goddamn right. You’re my little brother, and I love you. I don’t know what happened to you during the weeks you were gone, but if you think I’m just going to go away because you’ve decided to be rude to me, then you forgot a lot more than those four weeks. You forgot who I am. Now, get your ass out of bed and go for a walk with me.”

“But…”

“I’m not asking you, Will. I’m telling you. Mom and Dad and Judy are gone, you’re still a minor, which makes me in charge. So get the fuck out of bed.”

“I’m not sure it works that way,” he said.

“It does now.” She turned on her side, put both hands on him and shoved him hard, and he fell to the floor. She was surprised at how easy it had been, since he had lost so much weight, and was suddenly worried she had hurt him.

“Hey!” He said. When he got up on his knees and looked at her she had a surprised look on her face.

“Will, I’m sorry!”

And suddenly it all changed, and it was his funny, kind, warmhearted sister, just being herself, trying to get him out of his head. He felt guilty, and a bit afraid at how he couldn’t control his emotions and his moods now. She was just trying to take care of him, like always.

“I’m okay, Penny,” he said. He stood, reached his hand out and pulled her up and they walked out of the room.

Robot was standing in the hall as always. Will started to walk past him without saying anything. “Hey!” Penny said. “You have anything to say to Robot?”

“Sorry, Robot. We’re going to go for a walk.”

Robot started to turn and walk with them. “No, just us,” Will said. Robot stopped and bowed his head.

“Will!” Penny said.

“Sorry, I wanted it to just be us.”

Penny walked up to Robot. She patted him on the shoulder. “It’ll be okay. You stay here for now.” Then she lowered her voice into a whisper. “I’ll talk to him. Help Will Robinson.”

Robot watched the siblings walk away.

When they stepped outside, it was windy and the rain had picked up. It wasn’t pouring yet, but it looked like it could start at any minute. “Just a sec,” Will said. He ran back inside and brought them both jackets.

They walked across the yard and out in the road. The woods were across the street, and Penny glanced at them, still thinking about Liam hiding there, watching her. She had no idea how long he had been spying on her through the trees. She shuddered.

She hadn’t told Will anything about Liam. She figured her brother had enough issues to deal with on his own. And…he was so needy now. She immediately hated herself for thinking that. But he had never been that way before, even when he was afraid of everything. Now, Will didn’t want to let her out of his sight, often following her from room to room. She had gone out with Vijay mainly because she thought Will needed a little space from her. She would have been happy to stay home with him, but she was afraid that was just encouraging this…thing…whatever it was, that made him cling to her.

So with her brother’s emotions the way they were, and the way he wanted to spend all his time with her, she didn’t know how he would respond if he found out Liam had shot her. So she decided it was best to keep it from him until he was back to normal. If he gets back to normal, she thought, and regretted it.

She looped her arm inside Will’s and leaned against him as they walked. She felt his body lean into her’s, and sort of relax.

“It’s getting cold, Will. Dad better bring the crops in or they’re going to be ruined.”

“How do you know?” He asked.

She laughed. “Good point. I don’t know a damn thing about farming. Less than Dad even. I can’t believe he wants to be a farmer.”

“It sounds pretty good to me,” Will said.

“Seriously? Farming?”

“Yeah. Wake up in the same bed every day. In the same house. Go out to the same fields. Plant. Take care of the crops. Harvest them. Sell them. Do it all over again. You could do it too, and have a house near me.”

“Yeah, surrounded by dirt. Unless it rains. Then mud. Up before the sun. Eventually we would have animals. Then the smell of manure everywhere. Allergies. No thanks little brother. It’s not for me.”

“But nothing has to change,” he said. “Like time just stops, you know? And your whole life, you’re surrounded by your family. What could be better than that?”

“Um…explore strange new worlds, seek out new life and new civilizations. Boldly go where no man has gone before. What’s wrong with that? That’s the brother I know.”

“I was fucking stupid, Penny.”

“Listen to the mouth on you.”

“Seriously? You swear like a sailor. Judy does too. Not as much as you, but she does.”

“First, how many sailors do you know?”

“Dad was in the Navy.”

“He was a SEAL! And he doesn’t swear hardly at all around us. Secondly, you don’t. You never have. It’s just not you, Will. It sounds…out of character.”

“Out of character? I’m a character now?”

“Yeah, you’re a character. And you know what? I like your character. Try not to change too much.”

“You want me to be sweet and innocent, don’t you?” He said.

She reached up and kissed him on the cheek. “You’re fucking right I do.”

He laughed for the first time since he had been back. She liked the sound of it. And as they walked and talked, she felt him continue to relax. Now she regretted going out with Vijay the night before. She loved her brother, and he did need her close while he was getting past whatever had happened to him.

“You were mad that I went out last night, weren’t you?” She asked.

This time he didn’t deny it, but he didn’t answer at first either. Finally he said, “Yeah, I’m sorry Penny. I was an idiot. You have Vijay and you need a life without me in it too.”

She stopped and turned to him. “I will never have a life without you in it. Okay? So don’t even think that. And to be perfectly honest, the whole time I was with Vijay I was worrying about you. It was stupid. You just got back and you’re…”

When she didn’t finish the sentence he said, “Weird?”

“No! I didn’t say weird. Well, no weirder than before.” She smiled, put her arm back inside his and they began to walk again.

“You’re just…troubled. Why did it make you mad?”

He didn’t answer at first, then said, “I don’t know. I was just an idiot.”

When she had asked him, she hoped it would lead him to talk about what had happened, but she wasn’t going to push it. Baby steps.

They walked on without talking for awhile. “You haven’t been sleeping, have you?” She asked after a few minutes.

“Some,” he said.

“Nightmares?”

“Trying to avoid them. When I shut my bedroom door, I’m alone.”

“Well, you could let Robot in, like you used to.”

When he ignored what she said, she added, “tonight I’ll give you something to help you sleep.”

“No. I don’t want to take anything. I’ll get past it.”

She sighed, and decided to change the subject. “So, you’re going back to school?”

“Yeah. Monday.”

“You don’t want to wait for Mom and Dad to come back?”

“What if they don’t come back? I still need to be back in school.”

She pulled him to a stop. “What do you mean if they don’t come back?”

He looked up in the sky. The rain was starting to fall a little harder. He pulled his hood up and said, “Put your hood on, Penny.”

He had gone from shutting himself away from her for almost a day, to taking care of her like he was the older sibling. It felt nice, and she complied, but still was looking at him. She repeated: “What do you mean, if they don’t come back?”

“I don’t know. Space is a big place,” he said.

“Space is a big place? Space is a big place? This is your answer? It’s not even scientific. You could have said, ‘space is an endless void,’ or ‘space is a vast three dimensional region that begins where the planet’s atmosphere ends.’ Something that sounds more like you.”

“You read that definition somewhere, didn’t you?” He said, as they started walking again.

“Yeah, I did.”

“I knew it.”

“Hey, I’m writing a book and I’m not Mr. Science Genius Nerd, so fuck you and your space is a big place,” she said, in a squeaky, cartoon voice.

“Just like a sailor.”

“You don’t know any sailors!”

“I know you,” he said.

“I know you too, Will,” she said quietly, her voice serious now.

He didn’t respond, but he pulled his arm free and put it around her.

“You do know me, Penny. I’m glad you do. I just…I don’t want to lose this, you know? I don’t want to lose you.”

“Lose me? How would you ever lose me? I love you. You’re my brother. You’re the best human I know, and I’ll always love you.”

“But if I went back to space…”

When he didn’t finish, she said, “you’re afraid of not coming back?”

When he didn’t answer, she knew that’s what it was. So she didn’t ask him again, she just said, “I love you, Will.”

“I love you too, Penny.”

They walked a few more minutes, and he said, “Will you love me if I’m not the same person anymore?”

“I’ll love you forever, little brother, I don’t care who you become.”

They walked a little further, then she said, “Are you serious, Will? That you don’t want to go back to space?”

“More serious than I’ve ever been in my life.”

“You know, that worries me. I mean, I get that you don’t want to go back to space. I feel the same way. Once we got here I said I would be just fine if I never stepped on a spaceship again.”

“And then you did,” he said. “To come find me. You found me, Penny. I thought I was going to disappear.”

“Disappear? What do you mean?”

“I don’t know. Like I was getting smaller. Like…inside. It’s hard to explain, like I was trapped and…”

“Something was draining you,” Penny said quietly.

“What? What do you mean?” Now he seemed agitated.

“I dreamt it, Will. Something had you and…”

“No! That didn’t happen! It was just a bad dream I had.”

“Will, calm down,” Penny said, turning to him and pulling him to a stop again.

She saw how agitated he was, so she said, “I just had a dream too, I guess. I’m sorry.”

“So, I’m done…done with all of it,” he said. “I’m done with space and new frontiers and adventure and robots.”

“Robots? You mean Robot? He’s your best friend.”

“I know. And I love him. But none of it’s natural, you know? I’m a boy. Well, a teenager. I don’t feel like I’ve been a boy since I was ten. I should be in school. I should have friends.”

“Girlfriends?”

“I don’t know. I’m not thinking about that.”

“Boyfriends?”

“Do you think I’m gay?”

“Not necessarily, but it wouldn’t matter to me.”

“Me either. But I’m not,” he said.

They walked for a while, then Will said, “What about you?”

“What?” She asked.

“No girlfriends?” He smiled at her.

“Jesus, Will, aren’t two boyfriends at the same time enough?”

“Yeah, more than enough.”

“But since you mentioned it…”

He stopped and pulled her to a halt. “What?”

“Um…you know Tori.”

“Well, she practically lived at our house since as long as I can remember. What? You did something with Tori? Your best friend?”

“Not really, but remember when I went over to tell her bye the night before we left?”

“Yeah.”

“She walked me out to the car and hugged me, then she grabbed my face in her hands and kissed me. I mean, really kissed me. Then she smiled and said she’d been wanting to do that since middle school.”

Will laughed. “She’s so pretty, Penny.”

Pretty. Everyone she knew would say hot, but not her old soul of a brother.

“You know when I was eight years old, I told myself I was going to marry her,” he added.

“That’s because she treated you like a prince, Will. She was the only friend I had who always told me you were going to do special things.”

“Yeah. She was good to me. And she was pretty.”

Penny laughed. “But the thing is, I haven’t stopped thinking about that since then, and I do like Vijay, but I think maybe I wouldn’t have a problem with…um…”

“The Tori’s of the world,” he said.

She laughed. “Yeah, the Tori’s of the world.”

She glanced at him to see how he would respond, but he didn’t even look at her. He put his arm around her again, pulled her tight and said, “You’re the coolest sister in the world, Penny.”

She smiled, and thought about how lucky she was that Will was her brother, then she said, “but maybe you should. Think about a girlfriend.”

“I don’t know. No one ever liked me much in school. I guess I couldn’t imagine a girl liking me.”

“Are you kidding? I had to chase the girls away from you on the planet when we were stranded. A few of them anyway.”

“Really? That explains a lot,” he mumbled.

“I didn’t want anyone to take advantage of my baby brother. Besides, you wouldn’t have made the best boyfriend back then. You were all inside your own head, worrying about SAR and…”

“Can we not talk about that?”

She felt him tense up again. She stopped. “Will, you okay?”

“Yeah, I just…I want to put that all behind me, okay?”

“Okay, just know that if you ever want to talk about it, you can talk to me. Okay?”

“Yeah. I don’t though. But we were talking about you. You’re not in love with Vijay?”

She knew he was trying to change the subject. “I don’t know. Maybe.”

“I’m just glad you got over Liam,” he said. When she didn’t say anything he added, “Tell me you got over Liam.”

“Oh, don’t worry. I’m so over Liam. You were right all along about him.” You don’t know how right.

“Good. I don’t want to have to kick his ass.”

They both laughed at that. They knew he had no chance at winning a fight against Liam.

“There you go with the language again,” she said.

“Ass? I can’t say ass?”

“Nope.”

“It’s not even a real cuss word. It’s a body part. And an animal. It’s in the Bible!”

“Well, my baby brother can’t say it.”

He hugged her again. “Thanks Penny. For coming to get me. And for taking care of me.”

“Always baby brother.”

“Now you have to do something for me,” he said.

“Something besides risking my life to come and look for you?”

“Yes. Something harder.”

“What?”

“Let me be whoever I’m supposed to be. When I say I don’t want to go to space ever again, I mean it. When I say I want to be a normal teenager I mean it. When I say I want to go back to school, never leave here, maybe even become a farmer…I mean it. You have to let me do that.”

“But, Will. I know you. None of those things are you.”

“They are now, Penny.” She saw tears form in his eyes.

“Oh Will, what happened to you on that planet?” She stepped forward and put her hand on his arm.

“I don’t know, Penny. But I think it was real bad. And I don’t want to think about it. I don’t want to try and remember it. I was mad at you for going out last night, because I think I was alone for a long time on the planet, just thinking about the family, and it hurt so bad, knowing I would never see any of you again. Like days or weeks or something. It was so slow. I felt like I was going to live for years maybe that way, thinking about my family, and slowly becoming less of who I was.”

Draining him, she thought.

“So when I woke up and you were there in the sick bay, I just couldn’t believe it. You have no idea. I just…I didn’t want to let you out of my sight. I’m afraid that maybe this is the dream, and if you leave, I might wake up back on that planet with whatever it was that was happening to me. So I just told myself that you were leaving me last night. Like Dad did when he went to the war. Like Mom did back home when she was working so many hours. Like Judy did when we were stranded on that planet and she had all the kids to take care of. And like the adults did, when we separated. And I just told myself I would always be alone. So I was trying to prepare myself for that. Staying in my room.”

He was crying now, and Penny stepped up and put her arms around him. “It’s okay, Will. It’s okay. And you’ll never be alone, as long as I’m alive. I promise.”

Now she knew why he wasn’t sleeping. Then she was crying too. The rain was coming down hard as they stood in the road, holding each other.

They stood that way for a long time until they heard their mother’s voice over Penny’s wrist radio.

“Penny! We’re entering the atmosphere. We’re back. But…I have bad news. We didn’t find him.”

Penny wiped her eyes and tried to stop crying.

“Penny, do you copy?” Maureen called.

“Yes. I copy.”

“Penny, you’re crying. I’m so sorry. I know. We tried. We tried. And we’re not giving up.”

“I’m not crying because I’m sad, Mom. I’m crying because I’m happy. Will’s here. He’s here with me.”

“Hi, Mom,” Will said.

Penny heard her mother cry out in excitement, then Judy, followed by her father, as she stood looking at her brother. He gave her a weak smile and she returned it. And she was happy he was here. But that wasn’t why she was crying.

Chapter Text

The siblings turned and hurried back to the house. “Will, go change, you’re soaked, I’ll change and see you downstairs and we’ll meet them at the staging area. I’ll call Don and let him know.”

“What about Doctor Smith?” Will asked, as he started down the hall. To their surprise, as soon as they had landed, she turned herself back in.

“I’ll call the correctional institute and get her a message,” Penny said.

As soon as she heard her brother’s door close, she called Judy on the radio. “Judy,” she whispered.

“Hey, what’s wrong? You’re whispering.”

“Something’s going on with Will.”

“What?”

“I don’t know,” Penny said. “He doesn’t remember what happened to him. The last thing he remembers it was a few days before Christmas, but something happened. Just let them all know not to ask him anything about it. He get’s really upset. Okay? I’ll tell you all tonight what we found after Will goes to bed.”

“But, you say something’s going on with him. Is he sick?”

“No. I don’t think so. We went right to the hospital and had him checked out. They kept him overnight and they said he was fine, but something’s wrong. He lost a lot of weight, and his emotions seem to be sort of all over the place. I think you need to get him checked out again. But just don’t ask him about it, okay?”

“Okay, I’ll let everyone know. You going to meet us?”

“Yeah, Will’s getting changed now. We were walking in the rain.”

“Well, at least he still loves doing that.”

“Yeah, well, I had to force him. I’ll see you in a little while. I’m so glad you’re back!”

Soon after Will had gone to bed that night, Maureen knocked on his door. The family had spent all evening with him avoiding asking anything that happened to him, as Penny had advised, but Maureen wanted to talk to him alone. “Will, can I come in?” She asked through the door.

“Sure, Mom,” he called back in a pleasant voice.

She opened the door and he was lying on his bed, looking up at the ceiling. Penny had told them she had found him doing that earlier. She hadn’t noticed him reading a book, or doing anything like he used to. He was just lying there staring up at the ceiling.

Maureen walked over and sat down on the bed, “You just thinking?” She asked.

“No. Just lying here.”

As much as Maureen wanted to comment on that, she fought the urge. “I just wanted to check on you, now that everything’s quiet.” The Dhars and several of their friends had come over that afternoon when they heard Will was back.

“Thanks, Mom. I think I’m fine though.”

“Are you? Really? Penny said you kind of had a moment today before I called.”

“I wasn’t fine then.”

“But you are now?”

“Yeah.”

This was another behavior Penny had mentioned, like he had no ability to think through what he was going to say. He just told the absolute truth. When he said he was fine, he wasn’t lying, he meant it. At that moment. Maureen was trying to figure out how to ask him about what had happened to him, without just asking it. Maybe this offered an opportunity.

“What do you think caused it when you were with Penny?”

“I don’t know.”

This isn’t going to be easy, Maureen thought. “I was wondering. Grant and Victor and Prisha and some other people are coming over Friday evening. Hiroki and Naoko and Angela will all be here. We found some things when we went back to space…” she paused because she saw a slight change in his expression. “Um…I wanted to get some smart people together and discuss it. I thought I would ask if you wanted to be there. You would probably be the smartest person in the room. And you saw that city. Though we don’t think it was really a city. It was something else.”

She thought that would pique his curiosity, but he just looked back at her without saying anything. Penny was right. Something was wrong with her son. “So, do you want to be there?”

“But what’s the point, Mom? The aliens are extinct. I’m back. Why not just move on?”

“Don’t you want to know, Will? Where they were from? What they wanted with us?”

“Mom, can I please just not be involved? I don’t want to know anything about them. I don’t care. Maybe I’ll go see a movie that night.”

“Well that’s up to you, but it would be nice to get some insight from you.”

“Thanks for asking, but I don’t want to be there, if that’s okay.”

“Of course it’s okay. You can do whatever you want, honey.”

“Thank you.”

If it had been Penny, Maureen would think that was a snarky response, but she knew it wasn’t.

“And…Will…I wanted to apologize to you. For everything that’s happened.”

“It’s not all your fault, Mom.”

All your fault. She held back tears, trying to keep the emotions out of it. But she was sure he noticed when she turned her head for a second. When she looked back at him she said, “I remember when I first asked you kids about going to Alpha Centauri, when your dad was still away. And you only had two questions. The first was if there would be danger. The second was if your dad was going to go.

“At the time, I really didn’t have an answer for you, but I guess the answer to both turned out to be ‘yes.’

“But as far as the danger, twenty three trips had been successful, with absolutely no major problems, so I thought it was safe to say whatever danger there would be, you would be prepared for.

“I’m not sure I was right about that, Will. I could never have imagined everything you kids would go through. You especially. If I had, I never would have made the decision to go.”

“Yes you would have,” Will responded.

“Will I…” At first she thought he was angry with her with that answer, but when she saw his expression, she realized that once again he was just telling her the truth as he saw it.

“You would have just figured it all out in advance, Mom. Had you imagined what could happen, you would have had contingency plans for a robot attack. You would have made sure we took the spare battery to the surface with us when we escaped the Jupiter 2. You would have had it all planned in advance. But nothing would have stopped you from bringing us to space. You had to do this.”

“I wanted you to have a future, Will.”

“I know. But that wasn’t all. You wanted to be an astronaut and you missed your chance when you got pregnant with Judy. You fantasized about going to Alpha Centauri from the second the program was announced twenty five years ago. Somehow, someway, you were going to come to Alpha Centauri. Since you had kids, you had to bring us along.”

“Will I…I…” Now she couldn’t stop the tears from flowing.

“What’s wrong, Mom?”

“Nothing. Will, I’m sorry. I…”

When he sat up she saw the concern in his eyes. “Mom, I’m sorry.”

“No, Will. No. You have nothing to be sorry about. I just…I wish I hadn’t made the decision. I wish when you asked me if there was danger I would have stopped and realized it was outer space, and the dangers were simply unfathomable and there was no way I could risk my children’s lives. I wish I wish I wish!”

Will put his arms around her, and hugged her. “Mom, I’m sorry. I keep saying things and not even thinking about what I’m saying. I need to just stop talking all the time.”

Maureen hugged her son and cried, and thought about all the things he had gone through because of her. And she knew he was right. He knew exactly why she had brought them to space. Yes, she wanted a better future for them. Yes, Earth was dying. But it was still habitable and would be for generations. Compared to what her three children had gone through, face masks, gray skies, and brown oceans were nothing. They could have found love, raised families, and made their lives in the only home they had ever known.

Finally she stopped crying, and leaned back. She brushed Will’s hair out of his eyes. It had finally grown out, and she liked it much better now, though she would never tell him or Judy that. She hugged him again, then stood. “Thanks, Will. For being honest with me. And, I’ll never forgive myself for what I put you through.”

“Mom, I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“I know you didn’t, honey. You would never hurt anyone. I’ll let you get some sleep now. Judy’s going to take you to the hospital for them to look at you tomorrow.”

She turned and walked to the door, but before she left Will said, “Mom?”

She turned back around.

“Friday, when you have everyone over, you should invite Hastings. I know you don’t like him. I don’t either, but I think he probably knows things no one else does.”

“But Will, Hastings….he…don’t you remember? He…” she stopped when she saw he was just looking back at her with a blank expression on his face. Like he had completely forgotten the man was dead.

“I’ll think about it. Goodnight, Will.”

When she walked out, Robot was standing in the hall looking at her. She rushed up to him and put her arms around him and cried again, this time quietly, so her son wouldn’t hear her through the walls.

Robot kept his arms around her, but didn’t say a word as he looked at Will’s bedroom door.

Penny listened to the soft voices of her mother and Will, until she heard her mom leave and close his door. She waited another twenty minutes, climbed out of bed and walked softly across her room and out the door, closing it gently, so as not to wake anyone. She patted Robot’s arm as she walked by him, opened Will’s door a crack so she could make sure he was decent. She saw his silhouette. He was lying on his bed, facing away from the door. Still, she was sure he was awake.

She walked into his room, closed the door softly, and climbed into bed behind him. That was the first time he noticed she was there. He turned his head toward her, “Penny, what are you…?”

“Shhhh. Don’t talk. You need to get some sleep.” She wrapped her arms around him, put her forehead against the back of his head, and kissed his neck. “Go to sleep, Will. I’m here.”

He didn’t say anything at first, but he took her hands in his and brought them up to his chest and held them. “Thanks, Penny,” he whispered.

“You’re my baby brother, Will.” No other explanation was needed.

“Penny, would you not…”

“I won’t say a word to anyone. Now go to sleep.”

It wasn’t long before she felt his body relax, and his breathing changed, and she knew he was sleeping. Only then did she close her eyes. They both slept peacefully until the first rays of morning sun began to peep through his window shade.

Chapter Text

Will had gone to bed early, so Judy thought he would be up early as well, but by ten AM, she hadn’t heard from him, so she knocked on his door. She was surprised when he answered, “Come in.” He sounded fully awake.

She opened the door and went inside. He was lying on his back, looking up at the ceiling. “Hi Judy,” he said.

“Hey Will, how long you been awake?” Judy asked.

“I don’t know.”

She walked over and sat on his bed. “What have you been doing?”

“Just lying here.”

“Thinking?”

“No. Just lying here.”

“Will, that’s…” She wanted to say weird, but she said, “unusual.”

“Yeah, I guess,” he said.

“Well, I want to take you to the hospital. And please don’t argue with me.”

“Okay,” he said.

“Okay? Just like that?”

“Yeah. Mom told me last night. Is Penny still here? Maybe she’ll go with us.”

She had crawled out of his bed when the sun came and went back to her room, leaving him asleep.  

“Penny? To the doctor?” Judy asked.

“Yeah, that’s stupid. I’m sorry. Give me a sec. I’ll get dressed.”

“You don’t want to take a shower first?” Her brother had a few idiosyncrasies. One was that he loved the rain. Another was that he was a clean freak. He would take four showers a day. If it was hot out, even more. Anytime he walked out the door on a hot day back home, if it was even for a minute, Judy or Penny would say, “I suppose you need to take a shower now.”

“Should I?” He asked.

“Yeah. Physical, you know.”

“Okay, give me a few minutes.”

“Alright, I’ll be outside.”

“Okay,” he said. His voice had been monotone the entire time.

When they were in the Chariot, Judy said, “How are you feeling, Will?”

“I’m okay. I feel tired a lot. But other than that, I’m fine. I’m going back to school Monday.”

“Monday? That’s five days, Will. You just got back. Why don’t you wait a little while until we’re sure you’re okay.”

“Penny took me to the hospital when I got back. I didn’t get any communicative diseases, or they would have quarantined me.”

“It’s not about you getting other people sick, Will. It’s about you. You can’t remember almost a whole month of time.”

“Yeah. But I feel fine. How bout if they don’t find anything wrong with me, I go back Monday? If they do, we can talk to Mom about it?”

“Okay, that’s fair,” Judy said. “But in my professional opinion, you need to stay home for a while.”

“But I really want to get back to normal. And, staying home is just…”

When he didn’t finish his thought, she said, “What Will?”

“It’s all about space and space travel and the Resolute and all we did. I want to be normal. And being home talking about all that just doesn’t help.”

“Is that why you spent so much time in your room yesterday? Penny says she practically had to force you to go for a walk with her.”

“No, not really.”

When he didn’t say anything else, she said, “Okay, Will. I have to say it. I’m worried about you. You’re not yourself. And Robot just stands outside your door like a lost puppy, waiting for attention.”

“I didn’t tell him to stand there. He can do whatever he wants. Most of the robots left.”

“He’s not most of the robots, he’s your friend, and he’s worried about you. We’re all worried about you.”

“Judy, look. It’s simple. I just came back and I can’t remember what happened. So, I think it’s better that I not try. That I get back to normal.”

“Will, Penny told me you broke down and cried about it. That you were emotional when you were with her. But with me, you just seem…I don’t know.”

“Well, Penny and I have a different relationship than you and I have.”

“What’s that supposed to mean? I’m glad you two are close, but you and I have always been able to talk about anything. And I’ve always been there for you.”

“Almost always,” Will said.

“Okay, what are you talking about?”

“Nothing, Judy.”

They were just getting in to town, so she pulled the Chariot over. “Okay, what’s going on with you and me?”

“You weren’t there for me when we were stranded with all the other kids.”

“What? You knew the responsibility I had.” She had been feeling nothing but guilt about it, but now she was defensive.

“I had responsibility too, Judy. I was trying to get us all off the planet. And I was…” He didn’t finish his sentence, he looked out the window.

“Will. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t know what was going on with you. And what you planned to do.”

“I just felt…abandoned. By Mom and Dad, and then by you. Penny was my only friend. We became a lot closer then, I guess. I feel like I can tell her anything.”

Judy put a hand on his arm. “Are you deliberately trying to hurt me, Will?”

He heard the emotion in her voice and turned to her. “Oh shit. I did it again. No. No Judy. I love you. I would never intentionally try to hurt you.” And by the tone of his voice, she knew it was true.

“I’m sorry, Judy. I didn’t even think I was hurting you. I didn’t think about that at all. I was just answering your question. I just keep saying things without thinking.”

Now it looked like he was about to cry. She leaned over and put her arms around him. She held him for several minutes, and when she let him go he leaned back and she could see the tears in his eyes.

“There’s something wrong with me, Judy. It’s like, I can’t feel things the way I did. I mean I do, like right now. I’m so sorry, but until you pointed out how I made you feel, I didn’t even think about it. I love you so much, I would never hurt you.”

“Will, it’s okay. We’ll find out what’s going on. Probably once you remember what happened to you, you’ll get back to normal.”

“I don’t think I want to remember,” he said.

She put her hand on his arm, then started the Chariot and drove off. But she was thinking about what Penny said when she had told her sister they had to give Will an artificial heart. His heart was his superpower.

As she drove she thought about their time stranded without their parents, again. She hadn’t planned to distance herself from her siblings, she just did what she always did. She focused on her responsibility, and that meant, in her mind, that she needed to spend her time with the most vulnerable. And she knew what Will and Penny were capable of. None of the other children had dealt with their Jupiter being stuck in the ice, or the fire that Will had almost died in, or being stranded on a deadly planet for seven months, away from all the other colonists. Yes, their father was a Navy SEAL, and their mother was a rocket scientist, and one of the people who built the Resolute, but still, during that time, they had become a well-oiled machine. So she knew they would be fine. But now, she was again questioning what she had done that year.

Whatever was going on with Will, he seemed to be completely unemotional one minute, and to the point of tears the next. He had always been sensitive, so she was used to the emotional side of him, but the other side was something new entirely when it came to her little brother. And…he seemed to be unable or unwilling to tell the smallest of lies. Not that that was a bad thing, but now, she realized he had held it all in. The way she had distanced herself from him when they were stranded, and how that had affected him.

But what really bothered her was the way her brother was acting toward Robot. When they were on the Water Planet, the most important thing to Will was to find Robot. And he had. The visions, the determination, the sheer will he had shown them in finding his friend had impressed them all. Before that, they all still viewed him as a child in most ways, other than how smart he was.

But now, he seemed indifferent to Robot. Maybe more than indifferent. Penny had warned her, but Judy saw it herself the night before. She was walking down the hall, and saw Will walk out of his bedroom. When he passed Robot, at first he didn’t say anything to him. But then he turned and said, “can’t you find anywhere else to stand?”

Robot, being Robot said, “Yes Will Robinson,” took one step to his right, and looked back at the boy. Judy had smiled at this, but Will had just shook his head in exasperation and walked away.

When Judy walked by Robot, she patted his arm and said, “Don’t worry, we’ll get him back to normal.”

Will sat in the waiting room at the hospital while Judy spoke to the Chief of the Medical Unit, Dr. Canton. The woman was officially Judy’s boss, but they were also friends, and Judy wanted to talk to her in private.

She had explained everything that was going on with Will.

“Extreme emotional swings like that, I would say are early signs of BPD, Judy,” Dr. Canton said.

“Borderline Personality Disorder?” Judy said. “I don’t know, he’s never been like this before. He’s one of the strongest people I know. Mentally. I mean, look what he went through just in the last few months when that robot attacked him. And he went back to the robot’s planet when he was dying, to try and save everyone. A thirteen year old boy. Doesn’t that show he’s pretty strong, mentally? I don’t know many adults who could do such a thing.”

“No, I agree. But, one of the signs can be self-harm. Will put himself in harms way many times. When he was being evacuated, he detached his IV and heart monitor, and left the vehicle. He shouldn’t have been out of bed, let alone in a ambulance. And he even left that.”

“Because the doctor didn’t come back and the driver abandoned him!” Judy said. “What was he supposed to do?”

“And then he went to the planet with the robots,” the doctor said. “None of that was normal behavior. Especially for a boy his age.”

“Okay, I know what you’re saying,” Judy argued. “But this was something completely different. Will figured out what he needed to do to save the planet. Had he not done that, we wouldn’t be standing here having this conversation right now.”

“Granted, you might be right, but one of the classic symptoms a patient has is abandonment issues. You say he is telling your family he doesn’t want to leave and ever go back to space again. He wants to be surrounded by his family, and go to school where he can be with friends and people he knows. Nothing unusual about that, except, that goes against everything you just told me about your brother. He talked your parents into letting him go back to space alone, after only a couple months here.

“And, he was distanced from his parents for a whole year, with only his sisters. Did you stay close to him when you were all on your own?”

“Um…Penny did. Well…she stayed closer to him than I did. She had two boyfriends though, so that took up a lot of her time.”

“So, maybe that year affected him more than you realize. A thirteen…”

“Twelve. He was twelve when we left, and turned thirteen while we were gone.”

“A twelve year old boy, left on his own…”

“He wasn’t on his own!” Judy protested.

“Look, Judy. You didn’t do anything wrong. You had a lot of responsibility to deal with. But you can’t be defensive when we’re talking about Will’s health. Okay? It’s not about how it actually was, its about how it felt to a twelve year old boy. Perception is reality.”

Judy was quiet for a minute. The more she talked to the doctor, the more she felt responsible for what was going on with her brother. Finally she said, “So what do we do?”

“We’ll examine him today. But I suggest we put him in a counseling program. Here at the hospital. We have a group that meets three times a week. There are a lot of people suffering with issues after everything that happened here. I think that would be good for him.”

“I can talk to him about it,” Judy said. “But I need to discuss it with my parents.”

“Of course.”

“And, can you make sure they check out his heart? They examined him when Penny brought him back, and said everything was okay. He kind of absentmindedly rubs his chest. He says there’s no pain, but he didn’t do that before he went back to space. I want to make sure he’s not having a reaction to the artificial heart.”

“Of course. And Judy, watch him closely.”

“What am I looking for?”

“Suicidal tendencies, mainly, but any type of self-harm. Cutting, for instance.”

The doctor saw tears come to Judy’s eyes. “Judy, I’m sure he’ll be fine. He has a loving family and you for a sister. He’s a lucky boy.”

“Lucky? It’s probably the loving family that caused all this. He used to be so sweet and innocent, and we forced him to come to space. And me? If he has abandonment issues, that’s all my fault. It was my idea to separate from the adults, and it was me who abandoned him once we did.”

They didn’t find anything wrong with Will, physically. Judy had told them to check everywhere for scars, because of what Don and Penny had told them about his shirt being cut off. And his artificial heart was working fine.

On the way back home Judy said, “Hey Will. Can we spend more time together?”

“You and me? How? You have to work and I’ll be starting back to school Monday.”

“About that. I want to ask you a favor. Would you mind putting that off for a few weeks?”

“But…”

“They have a counseling program at the hospital. They meet three days a week for half a day. I think it might be a good idea for you to go. They have workshops and activities, and they discuss things that might be bothering them. A lot of people are dealing with issues after the robot attack.”

Now she waited, expecting him to flatly refuse, so she was surprised when he said, “Okay, if you think I need to go, can we compromise? What if I put off school for a few weeks, but don’t go to that program yet. Let me hang out with Penny…and you…when you have time, and when Dad goes to the farm, I’d like to see if he’ll let me go with him. And if things aren’t improving, instead of going to school, I’ll go to the program and see if that helps, deal?”

“Really? You sure you wouldn’t lie about how you’re feeling to get out of going or to start back to school?”

“Judy, I’m not sure I’m capable of lying. When someone asks me something, I just blurt it out and don’t think of the consequences.”

“Then it’s a deal. And that would be great. And I will have time. I’ll work my schedule out so I have days off when you’re home, and I’ll talk to Penny too, to make sure she’s fine with it.”

“Suicide watch?” He said, with a sarcastic grin.

“No it’s not a suicide watch.” She reached over and rubbed his head playfully. “It’s just, it really bothered me. What you said on our way here. That Penny had been there for you and I hadn’t been. It made me miss you. Miss how we used to always be. Seriously, it’s as much for me as it is for you. I love you, Will. I don’t ever want us to be like typical siblings who grow up and grow apart as we get older. I want you in my life always. You and Penny both. And since you aren’t in a hurry to go back to space…”

“I’m never going to go back to space,” he said emphatically.

“Okay, well, since that’s your decision, I want to make sure I don’t get so wrapped up in being a doctor that I forget what’s really important to me. And that’s you. Okay?”

He smiled at her. “Yeah. That sounds great, Judy.” And for those few minutes, he sounded like the Will she had always known.

Chapter Text

Friday night everyone was gathered around the living room. The Dhars were there with Vijay, who sat on a love seat with Penny. The Watanabes were there, and had even brought their granddaughter, Kiki. Grant, Angela and Don were there. Don was sitting on the couch next to Judy. John had gathered the chairs from the kitchen into the living room. He had grilled some fresh steaks that Don just seemed to come up with, and it had been sort of a reunion for them all. Most of them hadn’t seen each other since the robot battle or before, when the Robinsons had stayed behind after the children reunited with their parents.

“Okay, so Don and Penny, before we get started, fill everyone in on what happened when you went to find Will.” John said it in a low voice, because Will had decided not to go to the movies. He had made an appearance to tell everyone hi, but said he wasn’t hungry and was tired, so he was just going to go to his room and lie down.

Penny and Don told them everything from the time Dr. Smith had figured out what Will was doing, until they had him back home.

“So, he was lying there, like he had been strapped down?” Hiroki asked.

“Yeah. I’m sure he had been,” Don said. “And the restraints were missing.”

“Was he…dirty?” Hiroki asked.

“No. Sweaty,” Penny said. “But he hadn’t…he was just lying there.”

“Then he couldn’t have been there the whole time he was missing,” Hiroki said. “Not by himself, anyway. Did you notice his wrists and ankles? Were there burn marks from the restraints?”

Don and Penny just looked at each other.

“They didn’t check, but I did when I examined him,” Judy said. “It was hard to tell. Like one wrist might have had a mark, but only one. So either he wasn’t there long or he had been restrained long enough before, that the marks were gone.”

“And Robot was completely dismembered?” Prisha asked.

“Yeah. Like surgically,” Don said. “Not taken apart, cut apart. Clean slices on all his limbs. Of course when we got him back together, it was like before, the parts just did their thing and melded together like nothing had happened.”

“But he couldn’t remember anything either,” Penny said.

“So, Will figured out these planets really existed in the Sirius system? From this old UFO book?” Angela asked.

Maureen said, “Yes. He just…figured it out, and actually discovered planets that we really had no proof of.”

Penny heard the pride in her mother’s voice but she wasn’t having it. “Yeah, he’s real smart that way. And now he says he never wants to go to space again. So it’s all cool that your son is a genius, I just hope he isn’t so damaged by whatever happened he’s never the same again.”

“Penny!” John said. “Cut your mother some slack.”

“But…”

“No, John,” Maureen said. “Penny’s right. We made a mistake allowing Will to go back to space. And we might not know what happened to him, but he’s back now, thanks to Don and Penny.”

“And Doctor Smith,” Penny said. “She’s the one who figured it all out.”

“Yes, and Doctor Smith,” Maureen agreed.

“Mom, do you think we could do anything for her?” Penny asked. “Help her get released?”

Maureen looked at John.

“She did some pretty bad things,” Judy said. She was still the last one of the family who was willing to forget everything.

“And she did some pretty good things,” Penny argued. “She’s the one who took Will to Robot’s home planet. If it hadn’t been for her, Will never would have figured out the code to overpower SAR.”

“You know,” Don said. “After what she did to me, leaving me in the storm to die, I thought I would never have anything good to say about her either. But I have to admit, if it hadn’t been for her, we never would have found Will.”

John looked at Victor.

“Well,” Victor said, “The criminal justice system is still a work in progress here, so there might be a possibility we can help her. She hasn’t been sentenced to anything yet.”

“Maybe we can go talk to them,” Maureen said. “See if anything can be done.”

“If you think this is what you want to do, I’ll go with you,” Victor said.

“Speaking of the criminal justice system,” Grant said. “Any news on that Liam kid who shot Penny?”

“They were still investigating when we left,” John said. “They assured me he wouldn’t be released, or we couldn’t have gone and left Penny here. But who knows once they finish the investigation?”

“They wouldn’t just release him, would they?” Judy asked.

“No way of knowing,” Victor said. “They still need to prove it was him that did it.”

“We know he did it!” Judy protested.

“That’s not evidence,” Grant said.

“Um…about that,” Penny said. “I haven’t told Will I was shot. I think we should keep it to ourselves for now.”

“Why?” Angela asked.

“I don’t know. Just a feeling. Will is different, somehow. He’s dealing with his own issues. I just think we shouldn’t add one more thing right now. He warned me about Liam, and I didn’t listen.”

“Yeah, me too,” Judy said, quietly.

“You’re probably right, Penny,” Her dad agreed. “But he’ll find out eventually.”

“Yeah,” Penny said. “But maybe in a few weeks he’ll feel better and I’ll tell him all about it.”

“So, what exactly did you discover on the planet they were stranded on?” Angela asked.

Maureen said, “Well, we don’t understand all of it, but I’ve recorded everything. And I sent it to Hiroki, who’s been looking at the data the last few days. Along with a bone from an alien skeleton.”

“I do not have the DNA results back, yet,” Hiroki said. “But the most interesting thing, is that they were amphibious. I’m still thinking about what that means. I have some ideas, but I’m not ready to discuss them yet. So, why don’t you tell everyone what you found there, Maureen?”

She told them what they had found beneath the surface.

“A particle accelerator?” Angela said, when she was finished.

“Yes. It was incredible. The sheer size was just…something we could never have built. But it makes more sense now, that they’ve been able to build the engines and create the rift. They’ve probably discovered particles we’ve never known existed.”

“I’m not sure that’s the most important thing,” Hiroki said.

“What is, then?” Don asked.

“I believe it has as much to do with time, as it does space. I sent the photos and recordings Maureen sent me to Dr. Bryant. They seemed to have a pattern that reminded me of equations. Dr. Bryant is a physicist and also a mathematician at the University. And while he still has much work to do, he has been examining them all week, with his staff. He believes they were concerned with time.”

“Well, they couldn’t create the rift any other way,” Grant said. “You aren’t just ripping a hole in space, you’re ripping a hole in space-time.”

“It seems to me, to be more than space-time,” Hiroki said, “Dr. Bryant believes there were interested in time itself. How it works the way it does.”

“What do you mean?” Penny asked.

“Bryant believes the equations are comparisons of time. Or what he said was, they are comparisons of the theories of time. Time is like gravity. We really do not understand it. What it is. Why it is.

“Dr. Bryant has obviously just begun trying to understand it all, but from what he can tell, they are showing time running as an arrow and a circle. As if they are trying to figure it out. Not unlike us. We see time as an arrow, but a physicist might tell you it is a flat circle.”

“So far that’s clear as mud,” Penny said.

“Okay,” Maureen said. “Most physicists believe we’re in a block universe. Einstein did. Like everything is in one giant block. There are four dimensions in the block. Length, height, and width. And the fourth dimension is time. If that’s the case, the past, present, and future all exist, and are equally real. But they exist at the same time. We see time as an arrow. It begins, it travels one direction, and it ends. But if it is really in a block, we just experience it that way. But it still exists all at once. Einstein said what we’re seeing is an illusion.”

“My science teacher tried to explain this,” Penny said. “I didn’t get it then, and I don’t get it now.”

“Maureen, do you have your famous, white board?” Hiroki asked.

“Of course,” Maureen said, and walked in the kitchen and brought it back.

“You had to ask,” Don said, looking at Penny.

“Shoot me,” she mumbled back to him.

“Penny,” John said.

“Sorry, Dad. Go ahead, Hiroki. I’m riveted.”

Maureen sat the white board on the coffee table, and Grant knelt down and propped it up where they could all see it. Hiroki drew a straight line across it. “Penny, what is your favorite movie?” He asked.

“Star Wars. Not really, but it’s Will’s so in his honor, let’s go with that.”

“Okay. Let’s say the movie, Star Wars is our universe. In the beginning, we see the huge spaceship from the lower exterior.”

“The bottom, Penny,” Don said. Penny flipped him off and Judy punched him on the shoulder.

“From the bottom,” Hiroki said. “As it glides across the screen.” He put a dot at the beginning of the line.

“They go to the alien bar here.” He put another dot about a third of the way down the line.

“The Death Star destroys the planet here.” He put another dot further down the line.

“And here, Luke Skywalker blows up the Death Star.”

“Just like Beggar’s Canyon back home,” Don said.

“And they all walk in as heroes, coming back from a war,” Hiroki said, as he put the final dot at the end of the line.

Hiroki stepped back and looked at the white board. “This is the entire universe, in The Star Wars Universe Thought Experiment.”

“He likes this shit more than your mother,” Don whispered to Judy.

She hit him on the thigh and said, “shhhh.”

Penny noticed the exchange, and decided she was going to pay more attention to the two of them when they were around.

“The Star Wars Universe is the only thing that exists,” Hiroki continued. “The characters are the only people who exist. We are the observers. That is all we are. And we are observing their universe and all that happens in it. Once we press play, that is the Big Bang. And it all begins then, just like our universe did. We observe the Star Wars timeline from the beginning to the end. But, the whole thing exists. Now. The beginning. The middle. And the end.” He pointed to each dot as he moved across the line.

“Just because we cannot see it that way, does not mean that is not how it is. This is what a block universe is. The way we experience time, we think the past is gone, and the future does not yet exist. But in a block universe, the beginning exists at the same time as the middle and the end.”

“Okay, now that makes sense,” Penny said. “But what are they trying to do?”

“I don’t know,” Hiroki said, “But think for a minute. We can change how we watch our Star Wars Universe. We can pause it. We can fast forward it. We can rewind it.”

“We don’t really wind anymore,” Penny said.

“True. So let me just say, we can view it anyway we want. We are more than just observers in our Star Wars Universe. We have all the power in how we observe it.”

“And you think this is what they were working on?” John asked. “Trying to discover what time is?”

“Yes, perhaps they were just trying to understand time, the way we try to understand it,” Hiroki said. “But, if they were able to discover particles that we do not know exist, which they were probably able to do, considering the size of this collider, perhaps they already understand it, and were trying to observe it as well. Like we can observe our Star Wars Universe. Who’s to say what they were looking for. Or what they found.”

“But they couldn’t just skip to the good parts like we can do,” Don said. “You know, if you’re watching…”

Judy hit him again. Penny noticed again.

“Perhaps,” Hiroki said. He looked back at the board. “Or perhaps they went a step further. Something we cannot do with Star Wars. Maybe they are able to see it all at the same time.”

“So they can see the future?” Penny asked.

“Maybe,” Maureen said. “But it’s more than just knowing what will happen. They would have all the knowledge in the universe.”

“That is what science is for,” Hiroki said. “That is really all it is for. Getting to the truth. Maybe they discovered a particle that can help them do that. Get to the truth.”

“Tachyon particle,” Maureen said, as if she was speaking to herself.

At this Hiroki raised his eyebrows.

“What’s a Tachyon particle?” Aiko asked.

“A particle that can go faster than the speed of light,” Hiroki said. “Time slows down as we increase speed, until it comes to a stop, once we reach the speed of light. So, hypothetically, a particle that traveled faster than light, would actually go backwards in time, without violating the laws of relativity. It’s science fiction, really. But, the rift doesn’t just open space. It opens space time. So technically, we are leaping forward in time, every time we go through the rift. Even if it is only seconds. But we cannot reverse the direction. We can create a new rift going back to the place we just left. But time is still moving forward, at least the way we experience it. We are just in the same place at a different time.”

“The tachyon, if it was ever discovered, is supposed to go either forward or backward,” Maureen said. “So think about opening a rift that goes backwards seconds. Or weeks. Or years. That’s what the tachyon would do.”

“But, Maureen,” Hiroki said. “That is quite a leap to believe it is possible to go back in time. And even if we were able to, it conflicts with the grandfather paradox.”

“What’s that?” Don asked.

“A logical problem with time travel into the past,” Maureen explained. “If a girl could go backwards in time, and killed her own grandfather before he had children, it would make the time traveler’s own birth impossible. That’s the paradox. So physicists think it cannot be done. Most physicists.”

She looked back at the white board. “But I’m not leaping to that conclusion, Hiroki. We agree that they were working on time and it reminded me of something Judy said. She has a theory that they were looking for Will from the very beginning. From the time Robot first attacked the Resolute, Will was the target.”

She looked at Judy. “And, remember when you said Robot had started giving Will memories.”

“Yeah,” Judy said. “Will came in one night before he left and thanked me for being such a fun sister when he was little. He told me about a memory he had of the beach, when I was teaching him to build sandcastles. He was maybe two. But when he told me about that day, he described it exactly as I remembered it. When I asked him how, he said Robot did it. Will thought that Robot couldn’t just read his mind sometimes. He thought he actually read that memory. Better than Will himself could.”

“It could be the way they connect,” Maureen said. “That’s certainly not something we understand. But what if he can really go back in time? Robot, I mean? Not physically. See the thing about particle science is, we’ve just barely scratched the surface. And for a long time, a few physicists have been thinking about how memories are not unlike quantum particle behavior. Quantum particles seem to change when they are observed. Behave differently.

“And what makes memories may be caused by the same processes. For instance, if someone says they want to go to the movies, you might immediately have a memory of buttered popcorn. But you were not thinking of it until someone mentioned the movie. The statement triggered the memory. Something almost always triggers a memory. A song. A story you are reading. A face in the crowd. That is no different than measurement in quantum physics. The memory is there, but until it is triggered…measured…we can’t experience it. But memories exist. They are things. But they are not made up of matter or energy.”

“So, what you are saying Maureen,” Hiroki said, “is we time travel backwards in our minds all the time. What if they discovered a particle—call it tachyon—that could cause them to see the past? Not actually go there. If it is true, that would not violate the grandfather paradox.”

“Yes, that’s exactly what I’m saying,” Maureen said. “A tachyon particle that can transfer information, not matter.”

“But that doesn’t explain why they would want Will,” Penny said. “I mean, even if they knew he was on the Resolute because they could see the past, he was an eleven year old boy. There was nothing in his past they could have seen that would make them want to kill him.”

“That’s not necessarily true,” Hiroki said. “There are several thought experiments in which the ability to see the past—enough of the past—could actually make it possible to see the future. Or at least predict the future. And if they did discover the tachyon, it could possibly transfer information from the future as well as the past.”

“Wait, that does not compute,” Don said. “The first part. How would knowing the past help you see the future?”

“Causality,” Hiroki said. “If we live in a deterministic universe, in which all events are caused by something that happened in the past, and if a species could see everything in the past, hypothetically, they could calculate everything that happens in the future as well.”

“So what does that have to do with Will?” Penny asked.

“Great question,” Maureen said. “And it’s the important question. I thought the aliens wanted to destroy the human race, and I could never figure out why an advanced civilization would want to destroy humans. And now I don’t know what they wanted.”

No one spoke for several minutes, all of them thinking about what Hiroki and Maureen had said. But Judy was thinking about something else. Something Will had told her. Maybe it’s all my fault. Everything that happened to us.

Finally she broke the silence in the room: “What if they could see that on the 24th Colonist’s trip to Alpha Centauri, after twenty three successful missions, there would be a boy who would somehow be a danger to them in the future? Such a danger that they would do everything in their power to destroy him?”

The room had become silent after Judy’s last statement. After awhile, they bid each other good night, and their guests left, while the Robinsons got ready for bed. Maureen walked Hiroki out and stood outside his family’s Chariot with him.

“Hiroki,” Maureen said. “Do you believe in causality? That the universe is deterministic?” She asked.

He thought for a minute, then said, “When did you first realize you wanted to come to space, Maureen?”

She smiled at the memory. “I was seven years old, and my father and I used to watch all of these documentaries together about space and the universe. Then we would go outside and gaze at the stars for hours. And I guess, it was the bonding with him that made me enjoy that time, and piqued my interest. And from then on, it was just something I couldn’t get out of my mind.”

“I thought you told me you were raised on a farm? Why was your father so interested in space?”

“My father was raised on a farm as well. He used to camp out in the fields all the time with his brothers when they were children, and they would just lie up and look at the stars. He used to describe it so well. These three little boys, lying in a wide field of grass, just looking up at the stars at night. He told me that for as long as he could remember, he was intrigued by it. He bought books and watched movies and TV shows about space. And he finally got a telescope when he was a teenager. That was my first telescope, too.”

“Your father used to lie in the fields of the family farm in California, looking up at the stars,” Hiroki said and smiled. “So, do you think your family would be here, on Alpha Centauri, if your father had been born in a city, where the stars are practically invisible?”

Maureen smiled. “Probably not.”

Hiroki smiled back at her. “Yes, Maureen. I believe everything that happens is caused by something that happened previously. The world is a very strange place. But at it’s core, it is all very explainable. And, predictable. If you have enough data.”

Maureen stood in the driveway and watched as the Chariot backed out. Then looked up at the stars. But for once, the sight didn’t comfort her. Because she was thinking about the robots and Will, and that Judy just could be right. And if she was, what was it the robots could have seen that made her son such a danger to them in the future?

Will was lying on his bed. It was finally quiet in the house. At first he had been able to tune them out. He had heard something about Liam, but didn’t catch what that was about. But it turned out, the walls in these 3-D printed buildings were paper thin. And try as he might to ignore the voices in the other room, he had been pulled in, once Hiroki began speaking.

Now he laid there looking up at the ceiling, thinking that whatever it was they had discovered on the planet with the destroyed alien civilization, it was connected to what had happened to him. The thing that he couldn’t remember.

Will didn’t fall asleep until early in the morning.

Chapter Text

Judy’s idea seemed to have worked. The family freed up time to spend with Will, so that he wasn’t alone, and over the next couple of weeks, he almost seemed back to normal. He was even nicer to Robot, though they all noticed Robot still didn’t go in the boy’s room at night. Though Will was sleeping better, and was up early, without lying in bed for hours, staring up at the ceiling.

Judy changed her schedule to work three twelve hour days at the hospital so she would have more time with him, and they began to grow closer again. Penny was happy to see this, as she knew Will held some resentment towards their older sister.

And when Judy wasn’t home, Penny made sure to be. If she was hanging out with Vijay, they included Will in whatever they planned to do. They hiked a lot, though once when Will asked them if they could hike up to the dam, both of them said they knew of better places to go. The thought that Liam had been spying on the two of them when they had gone swimming and everything they did after still hung in the air between them, though they never spoke about it.

But as the other family members grew closer to Will again, Penny noticed he wasn’t as clingy as he had been to her, though he never went to bed at night without knocking on her door and hugging her, and telling her goodnight. Which she always liked as well.

One night after he hugged her goodnight, she watched him walk down the hall to his bedroom. But before he went in, he turned back to her and said, “Penny, that night you came and slept with me because you knew I didn’t want to be alone. You’ll never understand how much that meant.”

She smiled at him, then he walked in his room and closed the door.

Penny still stood in the hall looking at his door, smiling. “Goodnight baby brother,” she whispered under her breath, then went back in her room.

Maureen tried several times to get Will to go to Alpha with her, but he always refused, so she tried to come home early a couple nights a week to be with him, and she noticed the two of them were getting closer again. She promised herself that she would try and get better at delegating responsibilities at work, to spend even more time with him. Though even when she came home early, she was often called on the radio and still seemed to spend that extra time working. 

But what Will really liked was to go to the farm with his dad. The first time he had gone, John walked him over the entire property and showed him what he was planting, and what his plans were for the future.

They finally had the father-son time together that they had both longed for, and as they grew closer, Will asked his father about being overseas, and how bad it had been. John didn’t want to get into details, but he told him as much as he thought he could. He knew the boy just wanted to know his father better.

John thought about when he had first come back from his long three year deployment so he could go to Alpha Centauri with his family. Will seemed scared to even be around him. And when they were stranded on the first planet, the one they refused to name because it had changed all their lives so much, Will did everything he could to avoid his dad.

But on the water planet, and then after they had reunited with the kids after the year apart, they seemed to have broken the wall that existed between the two of them. Will was older of course, and that was a lot of it. But John knew he had grown up a lot in the year he was gone, in more than just height.

John had mixed feelings about that. He knew his son needed to get over the fear that seemed to be such a big part of his life as a small boy, but he also missed helping his son get over those fears. John had had a good relationship with his own father, and he knew that he hadn’t done right by his children. Even though he and Judy had been so close, and she carried a lot of anger with her for a long time, John felt Will had needed him more than the other kids, and he would always regret the time he had lost with him.

So when Will expressed an interest in accompanying John to the farm, he had been both surprised and pleased.

They had been out to the property several times, when one day, John pointed toward the end of the field where the creek ran out of the woods beneath some small hills. “I think I might build a house there, eventually. It’s peaceful.”

“That sounds great, Dad,” Will said.

John looked at him and smiled. “You really think so?”

“Yeah. I mean, I couldn’t see you being a farmer. But now I sorta get it. You’re right. It’s just…peaceful.”

“Well, I didn’t think I could be a farmer either. And between you and me and the fence post, it’s been pretty boring. But now that you’ve been coming out here with me, I don’t know. Maybe I could get used to it.”

Will smiled at him. “Would it sound crazy if I told you I wanted to be a farmer too? I was reading about this tribe in the Andes in Peru a couple nights ago. They’re modern. Not like an Amazon tribe that lives like it’s still the stone age or anything. They have electricity and all that. But they still live like they have for thousands of years in a lot of ways.

“Like, when two kids get ready to marry, they go to the elder, who’s sort of like a chief. And he gives the couple a plot of land. They all have the same amount of land. Like an acre or something. I don’t really remember. And all the people in the tribe come and help them build a house, and the two kids get married and farm that acre. And they all just live together in that tribe until they die. It’s like, no one ever leaves. It just sounded really nice when I read about it.”

John smiled. “That does sound nice. It’s certainly not what I would have expected. You being a farmer. But crazy? No. It makes sense in a weird way. Sometimes, we just feel like we put in our time—paid our dues—and it’s okay for someone else to take over. You’ve certainly paid your dues.”

Will noticed his father’s voice cracked when he said that. And when he turned from looking at the creek and the woods, he saw his dad’s eyes had grown teary.

“You okay, Dad?” Will asked.

“Yeah. I’m just sorry for what you’ve been through, Will. What all of you kids have been through. You lost your childhood. We took your childhood from you. I just wish we could have spared you from all that.”

He had been looking at the woods as well, but now turned to his son. “Especially you, Will. What you’ve gone through at your age. It’s just not the way it should be. And I’m your father. I should have protected you from it.”

Will stepped up and put his arms around his dad. He remembered one day, about a week before they had gone to Alpha Centauri, John had taken him to Venice Beach, where his father had practically grown up. It was abandoned, and everything was boarded up. But John had walked with Will down the old boardwalk, and talked to him about the way it used to be, before it all changed. And he told Will that they had to leave, because Will would never have the things that John had had as a child if they stayed on Earth.

“Dad, you did it,” Will said now, remembering that day as he hugged his father. He was almost as tall as John now, not the small, timid eleven year old he had been almost four years earlier, standing there hugging him at the end of the deserted Santa Monica Pier.

“Did what, Will?”

“You got me here. Where I could have the things you had when you were a kid, hanging out at the beach.”

John let him go, and Will saw the smile and the proud look in his father’s watery eyes. “We got each other here, Will.”

They walked down the field, toward the creek and stood at the edge of the woods, John’s arm over Will’s shoulders. “I think I could see us being farmers together, Will,” he said.

“Me too, Dad. But you have to promise me one thing.”

“What’s that?”

“You don’t start talking like one. Me and you and the fence post?”

John laughed as the two of them headed back to the Chariot to go home.

When Will and John pulled up at the house, they saw Victor’s Chariot was parked in front.

“Hey, Victor’s here,” Will said. He remembered when they didn’t really like the man. Now the families were close friends, and maybe some day they would be even closer, if Penny and Vijay stayed together.

Will walked in, with John behind him. Victor was sitting at the table with Judy and Maureen. “Hi Victor,” Will greeted him with a smile.

“Hi Will, Hi John,” he said. But he wasn’t smiling. He looked serious. “I have some bad news, John.”

“What’s wrong?” John asked.

“They’re releasing Liam,” he said.

“No!” They looked up and Penny was standing in the doorway, where she had come in from the hall.

They all looked at her. All of them, save for Will, thought she said it because of the news. But she was looking at Victor shaking her head slightly, then she nodded in Will’s direction.

Will was confused. “Huh?”

“Oh shit,” Victor said. “Will didn’t know. I totally forgot.”

None of them said a word. They were all looking at Will.

“What?” He said. “What’s going on?”

“I’m so sorry, Robinsons,” Victor said.

“Sorry about what?” Will asked.

“Will, we need to talk,” Maureen said. “But let’s wait until Victor leaves.”

“Why are they releasing him?” John said. His demeanor from earlier was now completely changed. He had the look of a soldier on his face. Something they hadn’t seen since the robot battle.

“Will someone please tell me what’s going on?” Will asked.

“Not enough evidence to hold him,” Victor said. “They had no choice. They said they kept him as long as they could.”

“No evidence to hold him?” Will asked. “Liam? What did he do?”

“Will,” Maureen said. “Can we talk later?”

“No! You all keep treating me like I’m going to break! What the hell is going on?”

Now Judy stood up from the table and walked over to him. “Will, calm down,” she said.

“I want to know what happened!” He looked at Penny. “Did he do something to you, Penny?”

“He shot me, Will,” Penny said softly.

“Shot you? No.”

“Yes. He was hiding across the road in the trees. He didn’t take our breakup well, and he stalked me for weeks. And then he shot me.”

“And no one told me?” Now they saw a side of Will they had never seen before. Even when he had gone to meet SAR, there was nothing but quiet resolve written all over him. But this was anger. It was more than anger. It was rage. And he was directing it at everyone in the room.

“Am I a member of this family or not!” Will shouted.

Robot, hearing Will’s voice and feeling his emotions, walked into the room.

“Yes, honey,” Maureen said. “But we thought it would be best to…”

“Lie to me?”

“No one lied to you, Will,” John said. “We just thought it best not to tell you while you were dealing with things.”

“Dealing with things? What’s more important than this? That bastard shot Penny!”

“Will, it was my idea not to tell you,” Penny said. “I didn’t want to upset you.”

“I warned you!” Will said, looking at her now. “I told you back on that fu…fu…fucking planet! You shouldn’t have trusted him!”

“Will,” Judy said, putting a hand on his arm.

“Get your goddamn hand off me!” He yelled, pulling away from her. “This is your fault! You were supposed to protect her! I told you to watch out for her when we were stranded. I told you not to trust him, and you were too damn busy. You had responsibilities. Penny was your responsibility, Judy. We were your responsibility. You were supposed to take care of us!”

He was crying now. Judy tried to put her arms around him. “Don’t touch me! You were supposed to protect us. Penny got shot. And…and I don’t even know what happened to me. I can’t remember. It was bad. So bad. And I can’t remember what it was.”

“Will…”

“I needed you! I didn’t have anyone to talk to! You were there for me my whole life, Judy! And I knew you always would be, no matter what. If Dad didn’t come back, if something happened to Mom, you would always be there, just like you had always been. But I was wrong! I needed you so badly. I was twelve, Judy! Twelve when we left them. Twelve when we landed on that planet. And you just acted like I could handle the responsibilities of an adult. And I could. I could fix the engines. I could get us off that planet. But what about all the rest? What about having my sisters? What about having you to talk to when I needed to talk?

“You had me to talk to! So did Penny!” He looked at her quickly then back at Judy. “You both came to talk to me all the time. About each other! And I just listened and tried to understand and tried to get you guys to stop fighting all the time. And neither one of you even cared what that was doing to me.

“I was your little brother!” He looked at Penny again, then back to Judy. “Don’t you see that? Don’t you see how much it hurt me to hear you constantly attack each other? Why was I the one who had to play the adult between you two? I needed you. Both of you. Do you realize I had decided I was probably going to die when I went to confront SAR, and of course you didn’t know what I planned, but you couldn’t see how I was changing? You couldn’t see something was wrong? Doctor Smith saw it! Why would she notice but my own sisters didn’t?” Then he wrapped his arms around himself, looked down at the floor and cried.

“God, Will I’m so sorry,” Penny said. She was holding the sides of her head in her hands. Will’s pain was almost too much for her, and knowing she was one of the reasons for it was breaking her heart.

“It was my fault, Will,” Judy said. “All my fault. Not Penny’s. You were my responsibility. Both of you.”

But Will just kept sobbing, still looking down, not meeting anyone’s eyes.

John stepped up to him now. “Will…”

“No! Leave me alone! Everyone leave me alone!” He backed away from them all.

Maureen stood, “Will, please. Penny was hurt, but she’s okay.”

“How do you know she’s okay? Because she’s sarcastic? Because she acts like she’s okay so you can’t tell how hurt she really is? Do you think I’m okay? None of us are okay Mom! None of us!” He started crying so hard he couldn’t talk anymore. They didn’t know what to do, but they didn’t want to approach him either and make it any worse.

Then Robot walked forward. “Stay back!” Will said. “Stay back. You started all this. You attacked us! Why did you attack us? We were normal! We were a normal family. Stay away from me!”

But Robot didn’t stop. He walked up to Will, who had backed into the wall, and could no longer move away from him. So Will hit him. He pounded Robot’s chest, then hit him in the side of his head. First with his right hand, then his left. He struck him over and over again.

But Robot didn’t react at all. He just put his arms around Will and held on to him. Finally the boy stopped striking him and it was like he just collapsed. But Robot held him up so he didn’t hit the floor, then picked him up in his arms, and turned toward the hallway. Will wrapped his arms around Robot’s neck and buried his head in his chest and cried. Robot carried him past them and out of the room.

As they passed, the rest of the family heard Will say, “I’m not okay. None of us are okay,” as Robot carried him down the hall and into his bedroom.

When Will collapsed, none of them knew what to say or do, so they just stood looking at each other for several minutes, until Maureen said, “I need to make sure he’s going to be alright.”

“Maureen…” John said.

“I’m not going to discuss anything with him tonight, John. I’m just going to check on him.”

She walked out and down the hall, hesitated at Will’s door, then pushed it open. Robot was sitting on his bed, Will still in his arms. He had settled down, but was just lying there, hugging Robot.

Maureen walked up and brushed her fingers through his hair. She started to ask if he was okay, but caught herself, after what had happened and what he had said. So instead, she just stood quietly, brushing her fingers through his hair.

He hadn’t looked at her, but finally he took his arms from around Robot’s neck, and took her hand. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me, Mom,” he said.

“A lot has happened to you, Will. None of it your fault. We’ll figure it out. But we don’t have to talk about it tonight. I just wanted to tell you I love you.  And I’m sorry that I haven’t been a good mother.”

“No…”

“I don’t want to argue with you, Will. But I’m going to do things differently. I love you so much.”

“I love you too, Mom. And I’m sorry for what I said.”

“You have nothing to apologize for, Will. We’ll talk about it, but not tonight.”

“Mom, is Judy okay. After what I said?”

“She understands, Will.”

“Can I talk to her? I want to apologize.”

“There’s no need for that. She loves you. She understands.”

“But I hurt her. I know I did. I need to tell her I’m sorry.”

“Okay. I’ll ask her to come in.” She leaned over and hugged him for several minutes, then let him go, smiled at Robot, placed her hand on his shoulder, then left the room.

When she went back to the dining room, Judy was sitting at the table with John and Victor. Penny was sitting on the couch alone, looking out the window into the dark.

“Judy, Will wants to talk to you,” Maureen said. “Maybe you should take him something to help him sleep.” Then she looked over at Penny. “I’m going to do better. By all of you. And I’ll fix this with Will.”

“We both will,” John said. “This is my fault too. We’re his parents.”

“But Mom, this isn’t about you,” Judy said. “Or you Dad. We aren’t on Earth and these lines and roles about who is supposed to be a parent and how is way behind us. This is about us. The three of us. And what happened when we were separated.” She looked at Penny, who was still looking out the window. “We had to figure everything out on our own. And we did a horrible job, obviously. I did a horrible job. And I have to fix this with Will. I won’t talk to him about it tonight. He needs to get some sleep. But I caused this…”

“We caused this, Judy,” Penny said. Still not looking at them.

Judy continued, “I…we…” she looked at Penny. “We have to fix it.

“You remember when he was finally brought home from the hospital?” Judy said, looking at her mother. “And you handed him to me. He was so small. And you said I had to take care of him. That no matter what, I was his big sister, and after you guys were gone, it would be the three of us together. I took that so seriously. And I thought I did a good job. Up until it really was the three of us. And then I failed.

“He’s been holding all this in that whole year on the planet, and while he was thinking of what he was going to do with SAR, and Penny and I just didn’t even pay attention to him. If something hadn’t happened to him to cause these emotional outbursts, he would still be holding it in.”

“She’s right Mom,” Penny said finally turning to them, tears in her eyes. “And it wasn’t just Judy. I was seventeen. I wasn’t a child. But Will was. Just because he didn’t act like one doesn’t mean he wasn’t. And all I did was unload on him about Judy, and worry about myself. Yeah, I told him a couple of times I would be there for him, but I really wasn’t. Judy and I need to fix this.” She wiped her eyes.

“Maureen,” John said. “I think they’re right. Now that we’re finally all here together, we can be the parents we haven’t been going forward. But they’ve been there for him more than we have.”

“Until we weren’t,” Penny said.

Maureen sighed. “Okay. Judy go take him something to help him sleep, but now probably isn’t the time to discuss anything.”

“I know, Mom,” she answered. She left the room to get sleeping pills and go see Will.

When she was out of the room, Victor said, “I am so sorry, John and Maureen.”

“It’s not your fault, Victor,” Maureen said.

“I’m the one who opened my mouth without thinking,” he answered.

“You wouldn’t have known, out at the farm he was great,” John said.

“I thought it would be a good idea to wait,” Penny said. “But I never expected a reaction like this. I’m worried about him.”

Robot was sitting on the edge of Will’s bed when Judy walked in, something she had never seen him do before. He was so heavy, the mattress was bent into a deep U shape where he sat, and Judy was surprised the bed frame was holding up. Will was still cradled in his arms.

Judy approached them slowly. She touched Will gently on the arm. He looked up at her through red, watery eyes. “I’m sorry, Judy. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to say what I said.”

“Will, I don’t want to talk about it now, other than to say I’m so sorry. I really let you down. Both of you. And I need to figure that out. But right now, you need to sleep, okay? And we’ll talk about it when you’re ready. When all three of us are ready. But I promise you, that will never happen again.”

“Can you tell them all I’m sorry?” He asked. He looked almost pale.

“Will, they know that, but I’ll tell them. Here, this will help you get to sleep.” She handed him a pill. “Hold on a sec.” She walked into his bathroom and brought back a paper cup full of water. Will released Robot’s neck and took the water and swallowed the pill.

“Judy, I’ll start going to the hospital, okay? To those meetings.”

“That’s fine Will, but let’s talk about it in the morning okay?”

“Yeah. Okay. I’m sorry for what I said to you.”

“Will, don’t worry about it.” She looked at Robot. He had been looking down at Will the whole time, but he looked up when he felt her gaze on him.

She smiled, hugged Robot around his head. “Thanks for being here, Robot.”

She looked back at her brother. “Will, do you want him to…”

“I want him to stay in here, tonight. Okay, Robot?”

“Help Will Robinson.”

Judy smiled again, then walked out.

When she walked into the living room, her mother and father were sitting at the table still talking to Victor, though their voices were low. Penny sat in the corner by herself, no longer crying, just looking out the window.

“Hey, I’m going for a drive,” Judy announced. “Just to clear my head.”

“Okay, sweety” Maureen said.

When she walked outside, Victor said, “She’s so strong. Even after tonight, she seems to be fine.”

Penny was looking out the window, her hands on the arm of the couch, her chin on her arm, as she watched Judy get in the Chariot and drive away. “She’s not fine. None of us are fine,” she whispered.

Judy started the Chariot, drove off, but half a mile down the road she pulled over, put the Chariot in park, and broke down. Her body rocked with sobs, as she clutched the steering wheel. She sat like that crying for a long time, then she lifted her radio to her mouth, hit the call button and said, “Don. Can I come see you?” She could barely pronounce the words she was crying so hard.

Don’s voice came back quickly. “Judy! What’s wrong?”

“I just need to get away for awhile. Please?”

“Of course, Judy. Want me to come get you? You don’t sound like you should be driving.”

“I can drive, I just need to get away.”

“Okay. I’m home. Come over.”

“Thanks, Don.” She put the Chariot in gear and drove off.

He was waiting outside when she pulled up. He ran up to the Chariot but before he got to the door she jumped out and wrapped her arms around him and sobbed.

He just held her for a long time, before saying, “Judy, what happened?”

“Don, drive please.” She let him go and ran back to the passenger’s side of the Chariot and jumped in.

Don climbed in the driver’s seat, put the vehicle in gear and said, “Where to, Judy?”

“Far.” She popped the top hatch, climbed up on the seat and put her head out and screamed into the night as Don drove off.

Robot held Will until the boy fell asleep, then he laid him gently in his bed. Robot stood looking at him for a long time. Then he very carefully placed his hand over the boy’s heart. “Friend Will Robinson,” he said, his volume as low as he could make it.

Will didn’t open his eyes, but he whispered, “friend, Robot.”

Robot stood silently looking at the boy until he was certain he was sleeping peacefully. Then he turned and walked from the room.
Everyone had left or gone to bed, so they didn’t see him exit the house, and leave them all behind.

Chapter Text

Penny and Will walked into the barn, and headed straight for the horses. Will was five years old, and Penny was ten. Penny was allowed to feed them apples, and her mother had taught her how to do it by keeping her palm flat, so she wouldn’t get bitten. Will was too young, but he enjoyed sticking hay through the pen and letting them eat, though, knowing they were about to get apples, the horses pretty much ignored the hay.

After all three horses had eaten the apples, Penny finally letting Will feed an apple to one, to his delight, the siblings walked through the old wooden barn to the back where some bales of hay were piled up. Penny looked at Will and said, “Want to have some fun?”

“Yeah!” He said. He didn’t know what she meant but he was always up for whatever his sister suggested.

She looked around, found a pair of shears on a shelf, and began cutting the twine on some of the bales. “Spread the hay around on the floor, but pile it high,” she said. She showed Will what she meant, and he began spreading it out while she continued to cut the bales.

“Aren’t we going to get in trouble, Pen?” Will asked. At that age he always called her Pen, and when he was older, she liked it when he did so, remembering her little brother when he was so young. Before so much had happened to them all. 

“Probably,” she said, and grinned at him and they began piling the hay.

“Okay, that’s enough,” she said. “Watch.”

There was a ladder leading up to the loft, right under the pile of hay. She climbed several rungs up the ladder, turned, and leaped into the pile. She laid there laughing, and Will said, “I want to do it!”

“Okay, but you can’t go as high. Just go up three rungs, then turn around and jump. If you can’t turn around, Just jump off backwards into the hay. You won’t get hurt. And I’ll be right here.”

Will climbed up the ladder, found he was able to get turned without falling, then leaped into the pile. He started laughing hard, and Penny grabbed hay and started covering him in it, while he giggled.

“Hey! What’s going on here!”

Both kids turned and saw Judy standing there, her mouth wide open. She was twelve, and had already begun taking on a lot of responsibilities, and seemed almost like an adult to the kids now. They just looked back at her, knowing they were in trouble.

When they didn’t answer, she looked at the hay, at her siblings lying in the pile, then up at the loft. “We’re gonna need more hay,” she said.

She walked over and picked up the shears, opened more bales, and the siblings began piling it up. When it was high enough, she climbed the ladder all the way to the loft, looked down at her brother and sister, said, “This is how you do it,” then leaped into the hay from above, landing butt first. Penny followed, and they both helped Will up, though they each held an arm and lowered him, so his fall wouldn’t be as far.

They leaped into the pile over and over again for almost an hour, when they heard, “What the hell is going on?” Their grandmother was standing there looking furious.

“It’s all my fault,” Judy said, “I talked them into it.”

Will woke up, opened his eyes, and looked for Robot. When he saw his friend was not in his room, he was surprised, but assumed Robot was in the hallway where he always stood. At least since they had returned, and Will had asked him to stay out of his room.

Will took a shower, brushed his teeth, and walked out. Robot was not there by the door. Will glanced at his radio and saw it was almost ten AM. No one was in the kitchen, so he looked out the window and saw Penny was sitting in the grove of trees, drinking coffee. He walked out to join her.

She looked up when she heard him approach. She smiled, said, “you slept well.”

“Drugs. Penny, I’m sorry…”

“No, Will. Don’t apologize to me. Everything you said was spot on, and I’m the one who’s sorry. I can’t believe what you were going through and how I just didn’t see it. I’ll never forgive myself for how I treated you the year we were gone. I was so selfish, and that isn’t Judy’s fault, it’s mine. So please don’t apologize.”

He started to say more, but just leaned down and hugged her, then sat beside her. “Have you seen Robot?”

“Robot? Didn’t he stay your room last night?”

“He was there when I went to sleep, but not when I woke up. I think he left, Penny.”

“Left? He wouldn’t just leave.”

“Why wouldn’t he? The way I treated him.”

“But he understands. Last night…”

When she didn’t finish her sentence Will said, “You can talk about last night. I can’t just hide from everything. That’s what I’ve been doing, and I think that’s part of my problem. I need to start facing things. I need to know what happened to me. So I have to ask you about your dream when I was gone. You said something was…draining me?”

“Will, I don’t think you should talk about it, yet…after last night.”

“Please talk to me, Penny.”

She sighed. “Okay. But I didn’t see anything. It was a feeling that something had you, and somehow it was—I don’t know—taking something from you. Reducing you somehow. It was weird.”

Will was quiet for a couple minutes, just thinking. Finally he said, “We saw something. Out over a valley and past a canyon. There were some hills, and they were covered in red. I didn’t remember that when you first found me, but I remember it now. We were going to hike to the hills. But I don’t know if we did or not. It makes me wonder if something happened to me out there.”

“I don’t know, Will. When we saw the Jupiter 2, we just went directly to it. We didn’t look at anything else there.”

“I think if I could just figure it out, it might help me.”

Penny didn’t know what to say. They sat in silence for a few minutes, then Will asked, “So how badly were you hurt?”

“Will, that doesn’t…”

“Please tell me.”

She sighed again. “He was across the road and shot me when I walked outside. In the chest. I was in the hospital for awhile, but I’ll be okay.”

“And now he’s out of jail,” Will said quietly.

“I guess.”

“You know, when I thought I might not come back, it was my promise to you that made me determined to. Because I promised you, I had to return.”

“Will…”

“So you have to promise me something. Promise me you’ll stay away from him.”

“Of course I promise, Will. After what happened, of course. That’s the easiest promise in the world to keep.”

He looked at her. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“You won’t convince yourself it wasn’t him? I know you, Penny. And I saw you around him. And they say there wasn’t enough evidence. I can see you talking yourself into believing he was innocent.”

“No, Will. I won’t convince myself he didn’t do it. I’ll stay away from him. I promise.”

Will took her hand and looked out across the road into the woods. Neither spoke for awhile, then Will said, “Robot’s not coming back, Penny. We were getting close. Closer than ever. He had begun feeling things that he couldn’t feel before. Like when I ate food, he could taste it. Or feel the taste, in some way.

“And I think, maybe he couldn’t handle how I’ve been to him since we’ve been back. And what I did to him last night.”

“I don’t believe that, Will. Not for one minute. He’s the only one of us who knew how to take care of you last night. Who knew what you really needed. You needed someone to hug you and let you hit something until you just couldn’t hit it anymore and cry it out. He knew that because he is part of you. He’ll be back. I promise.”

“Do you remember that time we were all jumping in the hay at Grandma’s, when we stayed with her for a month in the summer?”

“Yeah,” she smiled.

“I had almost forgotten it. But last night I dreamed about it. But I don’t think it was a dream. I think it was a memory that Robot left me. I remembered every little detail. And I remembered Judy taking the blame for us. We tried to tell Grandma we did it first, but she wouldn’t listen and Judy had to do chores all day. We felt so bad we refused to do anything but help Judy with her chores.”

“Yeah, I remember.”

“She’s a great sister, Penny. She’s always taken care of us.”

“I know. I was really unfair to her. I feel bad about that.”

“Me too,” Will said. “And I think Robot left me that memory, so I would know that. I think it was the last thing he did for me.”

“Will, Robot will be back, I promise.”

He didn’t respond. They sat in silence until he asked, “Is everyone at work?”

“Mom and Judy are. I’m supposed to message them and let them know how you are. So…how are you?”

Will just looked at her for a second, said, “about as good as you, I guess.”

She gave him a weak smile. “Dad had to run into town, but will be right back, and wants you to go to the farm with him, if you want to.”

“That sounds nice,” he said. He looked at her and smiled. “Sorry.”

“Hey, if that makes you happy baby brother, I’m in. At least I can keep an eye on you if you aren’t going back to space.”

“We can keep an eye on each other.”

Will looked back to the woods and said, “I hope you’re right, Penny. I hope Robot comes back.”

“He will, trust me on this. He loves you. We all do.” She felt him squeeze her hand.

Will started going to the meetings a couple of days later. He was quiet at first, and said almost nothing in the group sessions. The counselor, Miss Godfrey, was a middle age lady who reminded Will of Mrs. Livingston, a woman who owned an ice cream place at the corner of a little park in his old neighborhood back on Earth.

Miss Godfrey was a consummate professional, and gently tried to bring Will into the conversations when they had group therapy, without pushing him. But he always said he didn’t have anything to say.

It was interesting to him, listening to all of the stories, though, and after awhile, he began to see that, while his experiences were different than anyone else, much of what had happened caused the same emotions in them as what he had gone through. He found it really was comforting to be around people who were dealing with the same psychological problems.

In addition to the group therapy sessions, they had workshops and activities, and there was a basketball court in back where a few of the guests—they called them guests because they were just there for a few hours—would gather and shoot baskets. There was sometimes a pickup game, but normally they just stood around shooting, retrieving the ball for each other, shooting again.

Will went Monday, Wednesday, and Friday until noon, when Penny or Judy, if she got off early, would pick him up and they would hang out the rest of the day together. Judy was always off on Tuesdays and Thursdays and spent the whole day with him.

No one spoke about Robot, but every night, Will stood outside, looking in the sky, trying to connect with his best friend. The rest of the family would watch him from the window, and occasionally, Judy or Penny or both of them would go out and stand with him, until he would get tired and go back inside.

Of course Will blamed himself. He had treated Robot horribly, and he knew that it was something Robot just wasn’t prepared for. Now Will wasn’t sure he would ever see his friend again, and he would never forgive himself.

Will had been going to the meetings for about three weeks. He was shooting baskets by himself on the empty side of the court, while several people were at the other end, playing a pick up game. A young man a few years older than Will walked over and asked if he could shoot with him.

“Sure,” Will said, and bounced him the ball. Will had seen him there the last couple of weeks, and he seemed to be in all the classes Will was in. He was pleasant and friendly to everyone. They called him Red, because of his red hair. Will hadn’t heard what his real name was.

The kid took a shot, swished it, Will stopped the ball and tossed it back. The kid made two more shots before missing, then tossed the ball to Will when it rebounded back to him off the rim. Will shot and made the first one, then missed the second. He had never been much of a basketball player. He didn’t play sports at all really back home, except when he was on a little league baseball team for a couple summers. But he was a good athlete and not a bad shot, he found after awhile.

They didn’t talk much, they just kept shooting and trading off when one of them missed, until a counselor walked over and said, “Group in ten minutes.”

Will said, “Okay.” He had the ball and started to walk toward the hospital where the therapy wing was. The young man caught up with him and they walked in side by side.

“So, you’re Will Robinson,” the young man said.

“How would you know?” Will said, with a slight smile.

“Yeah no shit, how wouldn’t I? If it wasn’t for you, all this would be a hole.”

Will looked uncomfortable and the boy immediately saw that had bothered him. “Hey, sorry. I just meant you’re famous.”

“So, you’re Red,” Will said.

“How would you know?”

Will smiled.

“Actually, it’s Phil,” he offered his hand and Will took it.

“So how you doing with all this?” Phil asked as they walked in. “Is it helping with whatever you’re dealing with? From what I’ve heard, you’re dealing with a lot of shit.”

Will was quiet for a few seconds, but finally said, “I don’t know. I think it helps to be around a lot of people who are…”

When he didn’t finish his sentence, Phil said, “Suffering?”

“Yeah. I guess.”

“Yep, misery loves company,” Phil said.

“I didn’t say that,” Will said, defensively.

“No, you didn’t. But isn’t that what this is all about? Put us in a little box with people who are dealing with a lot of the same shit, and we don’t feel like everyone’s staring at us. It’s a safe space.”

“Yeah. I guess. When you put it like that. I’m guessing you don’t like it much.”

“Not really,” the boy said.

“Why do you come? It’s voluntary.”

“Tell my old man that, Will.”

“Oh, yeah. Well, maybe you’ll like it after awhile. My sister wanted me to go. I didn’t want to disappoint her.”

“Sibling pressure is the worst, isn’t it?” He asked.

“You have siblings?” Will asked.

“An older brother. My older sister died. That’s why I’m here.”

“Oh, sorry. In the robot battle?”

“No. It was before that. But my Dad talked me into coming. He said I need to learn to cope. He’s having just as much trouble with it as I am, though. Actually, my whole family is. But I thought, maybe if I go, it’ll help them too. Weird huh?”

Will smiled. “No. I get it. My family all needs help. But they think I’m worse off than they are. So if it makes them feel better for me to get help, at least I have to try. You know?”

“Yeah, I know. That’s why I’m here.”

The two of them hit it off, and began shooting baskets every day they were there. Before long, they were sitting together during group therapy, and Phil began teaching Will how to play ping pong, and Will started teaching him how to play chess.

After a couple weeks, Judy walked in to the recreation center, where the two of them were playing ping pong. When Will saw her he said, “Hey, there’s my sister. I want to introduce you.”

When Judy walked up, Will said, “Hey Judy, this is Phil.”

The boy smiled and shook her hand. “The famous Doctor Robinson.”

“Famous? For what?” Judy asked.

“You kidding? For saving lives, of course.”

When she looked at him quizzically, he said, “During the robot battle, you were walking around in the middle of it, looking for injured kids, while just about everybody else was running the other direction.”

Judy smiled. Will could see she was embarrassed by the compliment. “Thanks, but none of us wanted to be in the middle of that. I can’t really fault anyone for running.”

“Yeah, but you didn’t,” he said. “Judy Robinson runs toward the danger.” He punched Will gently on the shoulder. “Just like her little brother.”

“Well, thank you for the compliment,” She said. “But hopefully that’s all behind us.”

“Hopefully,” Phil said.

“You ready, Will?” Judy asked.

“Yeah, hey Phil, see you Friday.”

“See you Friday, Will. Good to meet you finally, Judy.”

When they were in the Chariot, Judy said, “he’s a nice guy.”

“Yeah, we’ve been hanging out a lot when I’m here.”

“He’s a little older than you.”

“Nineteen. Not anyone there my age, really. I’m the youngest crazy person.”

“You’re not crazy, Will.”

“Yeah, I’m troubled.”

“A lot happened to you, little brother,” she said, and reached over and rubbed his arm.

Judy drove without saying anything for a few minutes, then asked, “does Phil have a girlfriend?”

Will said, “Why does everyone think I’m gay, Judy?”

“Not that I would care, but did I ask you that?” She said.

“No, but you wanted to. You just didn’t want to ask me directly, so you asked if Phil had a girlfriend. That’s your way of asking me. I can have a friend, you know.”

“Are you mad at me?” She asked.

“No, I just knew what you were thinking. Penny asked me the same thing. I guess because I haven’t really had any girlfriends.”

Judy said, “I guess, since we never really heard you talk about girls, maybe we sort of wondered.”

“It’s not like we’ve had many conversations at all…” Will stopped himself. “I’m sorry, Judy.”

“It’s okay, Will. This will take awhile. I don’t expect you to get over it immediately. It’s my job to fix it, not yours.”

Will just reached over and squeezed her shoulder, then said. “I’m still sorry. And I’ll work on it too. But as far as girls, you know, I haven’t had friends of any kind, other than Robot. And he’s gone. So it’s kind of nice.”

Judy smiled and reached out and rubbed his head. “I’m happy for you Will. Why don’t you bring him by the house sometime?”

“Maybe I will,” he said.

They rode in silence for awhile. Then Will said, “This was a good idea, Judy. Hanging out more. I’m glad you wanted to do this.”

“Good, me too.”

“Then, can we be like we used to be? How close we used to be?”

“Yes. We are. I mean, I thought we were. You don’t think so?”

“Well I did. But in the past, I guess before we were stranded on that planet, you would have just asked me if I was gay. You wouldn’t have tried to find out by asking a question you really didn’t care about. Like if Phil had a girlfriend.”

Judy was stunned. He was absolutely right. And now she saw that this thing that he was going through, where he was completely honest with her, was good sometimes. “Will, you’re so right. I’m sorry. I just didn’t think about it. It was personal and…”

“Personal? I wouldn’t think you would judge me for my sexuality. I love you and I love that about you. In the past, I would tell you everything, before I ever told Mom. And if I was gay, you would have known it before anyone else. Probably before me. I want us to be that way again.”

She smiled a little at what he said. “Thank you, Will. You know, I always wanted to teach you everything I could when you were little. But I’ve learned as much from you as you have from me. I’m so lucky you’re my brother.”

When they got home, Penny was waiting for them. They were going to drive out to the farm together. It was harvesting time, and John was out there working. They all wanted to see him harvest his first crop. Most of the farmers used remote combines, and sat at one end of the field, or in an air conditioned room somewhere close, and watched a monitor. The combine would already be programmed for the crop, the dimensions of the field, the rotation variance at the end of each row. All they had to do was watch it and be there in case there was a malfunction.

But that wasn’t John Robinson. He said it sounded like a video game to him, and he was going to do it the old fashioned way. He was going to drive the combine himself, and load the soybeans and corn into the bin on the trailer he was towing behind it. Maureen seemed dubious when he told her his plan, and insisted Robot go with him, just in case someone had to flip the combine back over on its wheels. And now Robot was gone. But the kids said they wouldn’t miss it for the world.

When they walked inside, Will said, “Give me a few minutes, I want to take a shower first.”

“Shower?” Judy said. “We’re going to a farm!”

“Yeah, and we’re missing all the fun,” Penny said with her usual snark.

“But I’ve been shooting hoops and playing ping pong. You could probably smell me in the car.”

“We’re going to a farm, Will,” Penny said, “You can’t smell as bad as that.”

“I’ll just be a few minutes,” he said, rushing off.

Judy sat down across the kitchen table from Penny.

“Will’s been playing basketball and ping pong?” Penny said. “What kind of counseling place is this?”

“Does he seem better?” Judy asked.

“Yeah. He has a few mood swings, still, but he does seem better.”

“He made a friend there. Kid named Phil. He’s a little older than Will. I think nineteen. They hit it off pretty well. It’s good for him. Actually, maybe that’s why he’s doing better. He’s never had a good friend before. A good human friend.”

“But you have,” Penny said.

Judy saw the sarcastic smile.

“What?”

“How’s Don?”

“Don? What are you talking about?”

“You’re a horrible liar, Judy.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I saw you guys on the couch the night we were all meeting about the alien space-time warp thingy. You acted like a girl in Jr. High. And that is so not you. Not even when you were in Jr. High.”

“We were sitting next to each other. What the hell, Penny, we’ve known Don since he crashed. The first time. He’s a friend.”

“Yeah, sure looked like it.” She was still smiling.

“Look, I like Don. I’ve always liked Don. I mean, he’s a pain in the ass, but I like him.”

“Are you attracted to him?”

She hesitated, then said, “Look. I like Don. I’ve always like Don.” Now she was smiling too.

“I knew it!” Penny said.

“There’s nothing to know! Am I attracted to him? Come on. He’s funny. He’s good looking. Of course I’m attracted to him…in a way. Aren’t you?”

“Well, yeah. What girl doesn’t crush on the first guy who pulls her out of a storage crate that’s floating through space in subzero temperatures and wraps her in a blanket.”

Judy laughed. “Well there you go.”

“But it was a crush.”

“Was?”

“Well, he’s still good looking and he’s still funny. But I think you have just a little more than a crush on him.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” Judy said.

“I know what I saw though.”

“You saw two good friends hanging out and laughing, when there wasn’t much to laugh about except Don’s jokes. And that’s all you saw.”

“Awww, Judy. Now I get it.”

“Get what?”

“You don’t know.”

“I don’t know what?”

“You don’t know how much you like him. You’re not denying it to me. You’re denying it to yourself.”

“Denying what?” Will said, walking into the room, his hair still wet from the shower, but dressed in fresh clothes.

“Just something about Don,” Penny said.

“What, that Judy likes him?” Will said.

“What!” Penny and Judy said together.

“It’s obvious. Always was. Way back on the water planet.”

Judy sat motionless with her mouth wide open, while Penny burst out in laughter.

“We going or what?” Will asked.

“We’re going,” Penny said, and jumped up and grabbed Will’s hand. “You coming Judy?”

She still hadn’t moved, but she finally stood up and followed them out, saying, “You two have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“I want a front row seat when you tell Dad,” Will called over his shoulder.

“I’ll be right beside you little brother,” Penny said.

“Stop it you two!” Judy called, following them to the door, but she also had a warm feeling inside. She didn’t know if it was because it kind of felt nice, that her siblings were saying out loud what she had been trying to deny, or if it was because everything seemed normal again with them, and that had been a long time coming.

The feeling didn’t last, because when she got to the door, she noticed Will and Penny had stopped in their tracks on the porch. She could see between her brother and sister there was a Chariot parked in the driveway. And then Will was running.

“Will, stop!” She heard Penny shout. Judy could see why. Liam was standing in the driveway, and Will was rushing him.

“Will!” Judy yelled. “No!”

But he tackled the larger boy in the dirt, and he was hitting him with both fists as fast as they could fly.

Liam turned him over easily, and was now on top, but he wasn’t hitting him back. He grabbed both of Will’s wrists, and pinned them to the ground. “Stop, Will!” Liam shouted. “I don’t want to hurt you! I didn’t do it.”

“Get off me you bastard!” Will yelled. “You shot my sister!”

“I didn’t shoot anyone, Will! It wasn’t me!”

Then Judy was there and grabbed Liam by the hair and pulled him off her brother. “Get off him Liam!”

“I’m not hurting him!” Liam said as he was dragged back.

Will was free and came to his knees and dove into the boy again, throwing him to his back and landing on top.

“Quit, Will!” Liam called, trying to cover his head. “I don’t want to hurt you! I don’t want to hurt anyone! I didn’t do it.”

Judy was trying to pull Will off now, but he was in a rage and ignored her. She wasn’t going to pull him back by the hair like she did Liam, so she put her hands under his arm pits, and tried to lift him, but when Will tried to hit Liam, his elbow struck her in the face and she dropped to the ground, dazed.

Will didn’t notice, and he still was doing everything he could to hurt Liam. Penny had been frozen on the porch since she first spotted Liam standing in the driveway. But when she saw Judy fall, she ran out to Will.

“Stop it Will!” She called, trying to get him off Liam without getting struck, but Will ignored her.

Finally, Liam was able to get control of Will’s wrists again, and turned him to his back and straddled his chest. “Will. Will. Stop!” He said. “You hurt your sister. You hurt Judy. I didn’t shoot Penny and I’m not here to hurt anyone. You have to calm down.”

Will stopped struggling and lifted his neck off the ground where he could see Penny trying to help Judy. Judy was moving, but she was still on the ground.

“Judy!” Will called. “Judy?”

He looked back up at Liam. “Let me go!” He yelled.

“I’m going to, Will. But you have to calm down, okay? Calm down.”

“Let me go!” Will shouted in his face.

“Will, calm down,” Judy said. She was sitting up now looking at him, with Penny kneeling beside her, an arm around Judy’s shoulders.

“Judy?” Will said.

“Calm down, Will,” Judy said. “I’m okay.”

Judy started to push herself to her feet and Penny helped her stand. Liam still held Will’s wrists pinned to the ground, but the boy had stopped struggling.

“Liam,” Judy said. “Let him up.”

“Are you going to attack me?” Liam said.

“Liam, let my brother up!” Penny shouted.

“Okay. I’m letting you go, Will, but don’t attack me. I didn’t hurt your sister and I don’t want to hurt you. I don’t want to hurt anyone.”

“Just let me go, Liam,” Will said. He didn’t raise his voice this time though. He sounded tired.

Liam stood up and Will pushed himself to his feet and rushed over to Judy. He saw her cheek was already bruised and she might get a black eye where his elbow had struck her.

“I just came to say I didn’t do it,” Liam said, “That’s all.”

“Liam,” Penny said. “Get out of here.”

“Okay, I’m sorry. I’m sorry you got hurt, Penny, but it wasn’t me.”

“Liam, just go, now,” Judy said. “You shouldn’t be here anyway, they told you to stay away.”

“I know, but I wanted to say it person. It wasn’t me.”

“Okay, you said it in person,” Judy said. “Obviously, that was a bad idea. Now leave.”

“Okay. And Will, I’m sorry.”

But Will ignored him, he had his arm around Judy and the siblings were walking toward the house.

Chapter Text

John worked on the farm until sunset, so it was dark when he arrived back at the house. He had very little trouble harvesting the first day, and had to admit, he was a little proud when he stood at the end of the field and looked back over the short stubs of corn stalks that remained.

He still found the job tedious and boring, but the thought that his son might actually start working with him some day gave him new resolve, and he had decided he was going to become the best goddamn farmer on the planet. Which was why he had insisted on learning how to drive a combine and harvest the first crop like they did in the old days. He had always been that way. Once he decided on a project, he tried to learn everything he could about it, from start to finish.

But he was a little disappointed that the kids had not come out to watch him. That morning when he left, they said as soon as Will was back, they would be there. When he walked in the house, he shouted, “Hey, Farmer John is home!”

But then he saw his three kids were sitting at the kitchen table. They didn’t seem happy. “What’s going on…Judy! What happened?” Her face was bruised, and her right eye was black.

“I did it,” Will said. The expression on his face was one of pure misery.

John looked at him sternly, thinking he had had another outburst, and this time had become violent with his sister.

“It was an accident,” Penny and Judy said at the same time.

“What happened?” John asked, as he walked over to Judy to look at the injuries on her face. He didn’t know if this really was an accident, or if Will’s sisters were just protecting him like always.

He turned Judy’s face to get a better look, but she pulled her head away. “Dad, I’m fine. It’s not that big a deal.”

John looked around at all of them. “Well? No one is telling me what happened.”

“Liam came by,” Judy finally said.

“What! So how did Will hit you?”

“I jumped him,” Will said. “And…”

“It was my fault, Dad,” Judy said. “I tried to pull Will off Liam and he elbowed me in the face. He didn’t even see me.”

“It was my fault,” Will said. “I don’t know what came over me. I saw him and just couldn’t believe he was here after what he did.”

“He said he didn’t do it,” Penny argued. “He wanted to come by and tell me in person.”

“Penny!” Will said, in exasperation.

“Not only doesn’t he belong here, it’s against his terms for release,” John said. “I’m going to call security and have them pick him up for violating the terms.”

“Dad, don’t,” Penny said. “Just…let’s leave it alone.”

“What the hell, Penny!” Will said.

“Will, he didn’t even hurt you. He could have, but he just held you on the ground until you calmed down. I don’t know. He seemed sincere.”

“Jesus Christ!” Will said, and stood and stomped from the room.

When he was gone, Judy said, “I’m really concerned about him, Dad. He was berserk. There was no reasoning with him. It was like he couldn’t even hear anything. He just wanted to get to Liam. That’s just not Will.”

Penny was sitting, saying nothing, just looking at the table.

“Have you spoken to his psychologist when you've picked him up?” John asked. "Maureen and I met with her a couple weeks ago and she said he was making improvements."

“I haven’t spoken to her for about three weeks. He seemed to be doing better when I've been with him. And today I thought things were almost back to normal. Until Liam showed up. I’ll take off early Friday and pick him up at noon, and talk to her and see what she thinks.”

Penny still hadn’t said anything. She felt their eyes on her now, and looked up. “Great idea, separating the kids from the parents, Judy. That’s when he began to change.”

“Penny…” John said.

“Great idea letting him go back to space, Dad,” she said, and got up and walked out.

She went to Will’s door and knocked. “Will?”

“What!” He called. She could still hear the anger in his voice.

“Can I come in?” She asked.

“No!”

She pushed the door open. She was surprised he hadn’t locked it, but he was probably just so mad he hadn’t thought about it.

“Okay, yeah, come on in,” he said sarcastically.

He was lying on the bed again, looking up at the ceiling as before.

She walked over and sat beside him. “Will, thank you for protecting me.”

“Yeah, I did a great job. He tossed me around like he was a dog and I was a chew toy, and I hit Judy in the face.”

“It was the sentiment, Will.”

“Whatever.”

“Will, please don’t be mad at me.”

“It’s just infuriating. I warned you about him back then. You didn’t listen. He stalks you. He shoots you. And you just act like none of it happened.”

“I’m not acting like that, Will. But he could have hurt you and he didn’t.”

“He could have hurt you and he did! I told you this would happen. He comes here and says he’s sorry and you fall all over yourself with hope that he’s a good person.”

“You used to be like that, Will,” she said softly. “Hopeful.”

“Well, I was an idiot. That’s not what the world is like, and that’s not what people are like, and that’s not what I’m like anymore.”

“Yes you are, Will. You’ll see. You’re the same hopeful, kind brother I’ve always known. If you weren’t, you never would have tried to protect me. You just need some time. As far as Liam, he could be telling the truth.”

“God, Penny! Don’t be so stupid!”

“Hey! I might not be a nerd like the rest of you, but don’t you dare call me stupid!” Her eyes flashed with anger.

“Then stop acting like you’re stupid!”

“Go to hell, Will!” She got up and walked from his room, slamming the door on the way out.

She stood in the hall shaking she was so mad. Then suddenly she felt horrible. She hadn’t gotten in a fight like that with her brother since they left for space. And had seldom gotten in a fight like that with him before. She started to turn and go back in his room, then said, “oh fuck it.” She walked away thinking, they got their wish. They were on Alpha Centauri. Now it looked like they were just going to be normal siblings.

Penny and Will avoided each other the rest of the day, and Thursday, when Judy came by to hang out with him, he just said he was going to stay in his room and read that day. Judy talked to Penny for awhile, but she wanted to be by herself as well, so she walked back to Will’s room, knocked on the door, and said she would pick him up the next day from therapy at noon.

“Fine,” he called through the door.

She stood for a second, trying to think of something else to say. Then she sighed and walked away.

Rec time for the guests was at ten AM every morning. Will normally headed for the court, where he and Phil would shoot baskets if the weather was nice, or play ping pong or chess if it wasn’t. Friday, Will just walked outside and sat down on the bleachers that aligned the court. When Phil saw him he walked over and sat beside him.

“Tired today?” He asked.

“I guess I’m just not feeling it,” he said.

“Something going on?” Phil asked.

“Nothing new, I guess. At least not anymore. Got in a fight with Penny a couple days ago and we haven’t spoken since. It’s unusual between us, and I guess it bothers me more than it should.”

“Want to tell me about it?” 

Will sighed, and didn’t answer for a minute or two, then said, “She just doesn’t get it. You know, we went through a lot of dangerous things the last three years. And now that we’re here, and the robots are no longer a danger, I think Penny’s just acting like there’s nothing to worry about now. But there is. People are more dangerous than the robots.”

“I don’t know, Will. I saw what those robots could do when they were pissed off.”

“Yeah, but that was all programing. It wasn’t even their fault. But humans…we’re just dangerous. And Penny walks through life like everyone is just fine. They all used to accuse me of that. Always having hope, they would say. Always seeing the good side of people. And I guess I was like that. But I’m not anymore.

“But Penny…she’s supposed to be the cynical one. Distrustful. But she isn’t. Not really. She saw the good side of Doctor Smith before any of us did.  When we had her locked up in the bay, she and Penny sort of became friends, if you could call it that. Hell, I didn’t even speak to Doctor Smith almost the entire seven months.

“And now Penny—there was this guy she liked—and she broke up with him, and he’s dangerous. But I can’t get her to see that.”

“I’m sorry, Will,” Phil said. “That’s what you two were fighting about?”

“Yeah. And just not speaking for two days is…weird. I feel like part of me is missing. When we were home the last couple of years, before we left for space, Judy was so busy with night classes getting her medical degree, and sports and everything. Dad was gone and Mom was working on the Resolute. It was just me and Penny every day. We did everything together.

“One of our favorite things was to ride our bikes down to this little park in our neighborhood, and get ice cream floats at the Dairy Bar, then sit next to it on this bench. It’s weird, we never fought back then. And I can still remember how those ice cream floats tasted.” He smiled, thinking of those days.

“Hey, ever been to Wilson’s?” Phil asked.

“The ice cream place? No, everyone says it’s good. Is it open again?”

“Yeah, opened a couple weeks ago. Had some damage from the battle, but I was there Saturday. Pretty damn good. Hey, let’s go.”

“Now?” Will asked.

“Yeah, It’s almost ten thirty, it opens at eleven.”

“I better not. Judy’s going to pick me up after group.”

“So?”

“This one time when I was a little kid, I was scared because we were talking about going to Alpha Centauri, and I skipped out of class and went to the park by myself. Penny and Judy were so worried about me I promised not to do that again.”

“What were you scared about?” Phil asked.

“It was just a dream. I dreamed we had gone to space, then Penny and Judy were missing, and something bad had them. I didn’t know what it was, but for some reason it was my fault.”

“And that was the last time you skipped class?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, if it’s been that long, I can’t think of a better reason than that to skip.”

“I promised them I wouldn’t do anything like that again.”

Phil was grinning at him.

“What?”

“Until you went off to face that robot on your own.”

“Well, we saw how that turned out.” He rubbed his chest.

“But the point is, you were a little kid back then on Earth. You’re fourteen now.”

Will looked around. “You know, you’re right. I’ll just call Judy and let her know.”

“Don’t do that. She’ll think you’re giving up on therapy and talk you out of it. Trust me, that’s what my dad and brother tell me when I try to get out of going just one day. I’ll have you back by noon.”

“Yeah, but they’ll tell her I skipped group,” Will said.

“It’s easier to get forgiveness than it is to get permission. And by then it will be too late for her to convince you not to go. Besides, if skipping group to get ice cream is the worst thing you ever do in your future, you’re gonna have a boring life.”

“A boring life. That sounds nice.”

“So, the hell with it, let’s go, Will.”

“The hell with it, let’s go.”

As Judy drove to pick Will up, she started thinking about everything that had happened since they had made it to Alpha Centauri. She had learned a lot about herself with all the things she had gone through during the trip from Earth. And she had found she could handle things she didn’t know she could handle. Especially the year they were separated from the adults. Even if she had screwed up the most important part, her relationship with her siblings.

She remembered when her father had told her she was going to be the captain of the Transport Jupiter, and it was up to her to get the children safely to Alpha Centauri. She was stunned, and thought there was no way she could take on that responsibility. But as her father told her how much confidence he had in her, and that she was the only person besides their mother that he would trust Penny and Will with, she did what she always did. She accepted the responsibility, and promised herself she would not fail. And for that year, she had a purpose. And nothing was going to stop her from succeeding.

And that was the most important thing she had learned about herself. She needed a purpose. Just going to work every day at the hospital wasn’t enough. There were rules and regulations and she had supervisors there constantly. After a year of complete autonomy, where every decision she made could lead to the deaths of the people she was responsible for, now she just pretty much did as she was told. Of course she knew that would change when she was more experienced. And she knew everyone respected her and what she had done, but the rush was just not there.

But now, once again, she had a purpose. She had to mend things with her siblings, and she had to figure out what was going on with her brother. Something had happened to him in space. He was just not the same. Oh, he was still the kind, loving brother she had helped to raise, and he was still the best person she knew, but he was broken somehow.

Penny had told her what Will had said. That they had seen some strange hills in the distance after landing on the planet, and that he and Robot had planned to go out there and investigate. But that was all he remembered. Judy didn’t know what that meant, and she didn’t know if it had anything to do with his disappearance for a month, and the condition he was in when Penny, Don, and Dr. Smith had found him. None of it made any sense. But something else she had discovered was that things in space often didn’t make any sense.

Whatever it was, she was determined to help her brother get back to the boy they had all known. And she was certain that would happen. It wasn’t just her determination, it was Will himself. He had strong character, and in the worst of times, he had constantly made decisions that would put others before himself. Even now, that had not changed. The most important thing to him was his family, which was why he had been so adamant about Penny staying away from Liam. His character had not changed at all, it was whatever was going on with him mentally, that had caused him to lose that hopeful side. His superpower, as the family said.

And so, she was confident he would be okay, and she was determined to help him. But then what? What would she do? She wasn’t going to just go back to space like Will did, though she had to admit, the thought appealed to her sometimes. To just take off and see what’s out there. But not by herself. As independent as she was, that didn’t seem like a viable option. Then she smiled, thinking of someone she could see doing that with.

She thought of the night Will had had his episode, as the family had begun calling it amongst themselves, when Will wasn’t around. She had stood on the seat of the Chariot, her upper body out the top hatch, screaming into the night sky, while Don drove down a paved road, then onto a dirt lane in the country. When she could scream no more, he continued to drive while she stood on the seat, letting the hard breeze dry her tears.

Then she heard the music pouring out of the speakers. At first it annoyed her, Don once again making light of something he didn’t understand. But eventually she started smiling, then laughing as she looked up at the stars and the music blared:

Knock me down, it’s all in vain, I get right back up on my feet again. Hit me with your best shot. Why don’t you hit me with your best shot? Hit me with your best shot, fire awaaayy.

As the song ended, she sat back down, closed the top hatch, and Don pulled the Chariot to a stop on the dirt road. They were surrounded by a forest on all sides.

“Why do you only listen to this old shit?” She asked, looking at him with a smile.

“I don’t know. I think that was the last great era of rock and roll. Everything after that was made by machines, pretty much.”

“You and my dad are more alike than either of you realize,” she said.

“Yeah, well don’t tell him that.”

She laughed.

“Besides, the song is pertinent,” he said.

“It’s about a girl that had her heart broken. How is that pertinent?”

“It’s about a survivor. Doesn’t matter what she was surviving. And you—Doctor Captain Robinson—are a goddamn survivor, if ever I saw one.”

Maybe he knows me better than anyone, she thought. But she didn’t say anything. She just looked at him in the glow of the dashboard lights. Which reminded her of another old rock and roll song. Maybe I should suggest he play that and see what happens. Damn he’s good looking.

“Want to tell me about it?” He asked, pulling her mind back from where it was drifting.

She sighed. “Family shit, of course. Will had a melt down tonight.” She proceeded to fill him on what had happened when Will and John had come back to the house from the farm, and Victor told them Liam had been released.

Don listened without saying a word. One of the things she had noticed, was that when they were alone together, he seemed a lot different than the Don they had known since first meeting him. And he was an excellent listener.

He waited without responding, not looking at her, but looking out the windshield. Finally, when he knew she was finished, he turned to her. “Look,” he said. “Telling you it wasn’t your fault won’t make a bit of difference. I know that. And telling you about all the responsibilities you had won’t make a bit of difference, either. I know that too. So let me just say this. What makes you guys strong—and I’m not talking about your mom and dad—I’m talking about you and Penny and Will, is that you are a team, like no siblings I have ever seen before. You almost never fight. Serious fights I mean. And you take care of each other like you’re joined at the hip. But it’s always been the three of you against the world. Even back on Earth, if my guess is correct.

“And there’s a reason for that. Your Mom and Dad are like, the epitome of overachievers. A rocket scientist and a Navy SEAL. Your dad was gone a lot and we both know how your mom is about work. So that left the three of you to fend for yourselves. And your parents had the luxury of having you there.

“But, you had to do things differently when you had ninety seven Wills and Pennys. And Will was only twelve years old when you first landed. He was smarter and more mature than any kid his age, and you knew he could fix the engines, so of course you didn’t see him as just your twelve year old little brother anymore. I mean, this is a kid who saved everyone’s ass so many—hell, I lost count of how many times he saved everyone’s ass. So you let him do what you knew he could do.”

“But like Will said, what about the other things?” She answered. “He needed me, Don. He was going to sacrifice himself for everyone. And he did warn me about Liam, and I didn’t listen to him. How is it not my fault?”

“Like I said, you’re going to blame yourself regardless, so here’s my question, what are you going to do to fix it?”

“I’m…I…” She didn’t finish her sentence.

“Come on Judy. You’re going to get right back up on your feet again. And this will be the easiest thing for you to fix, because Will absolutely worships you. So does Penny, even if she tries to hide it. It’s still the three of you against the world. So what are you going to do?”

“I’m going to tell them both how sorry I am, and that it won’t happen again. And I’m going to make sure they know I’m sorry. I don’t expect to fix it overnight, but I’ll fix it, Don.”

“And then you need to do one more thing,” he said. “And it will be harder than anything you’ve ever done.”

“What?”

“After you fix it, you have to forgive yourself.”

She just stared at him for a minute. “Don, I never thought I would say anything like this to you, but I don’t know of anyone else who would have known exactly what to say to make me feel better. But you did. And I love you for it.”

She leaned over and hugged him. They held each other for several minutes. In those minutes, she felt his arms around her, his chest pressed against hers, and she wanted to kiss him so badly it hurt. But he had made everything so right when everything about the night had been so wrong. The last thing she wanted to do was ruin it by having him reject her. So she finally let him go and leaned back.

“You ready to go home Captain Doctor Robinson?”

“I’m ready to go home Admiral West.”

Now as Judy drove to the medical facility, she thought of that night, and how close she had come to kissing Don. She knew it would have been a mistake, and she knew Don would have told her it was a bad idea. She was pretty sure he was attracted to her as well, but there were just too many issues for it to go anywhere, and she didn’t want to risk their friendship. But she could fantasize, and she did. A lot.

Judy arrived at the facility a few minutes before noon. Normally Will would be waiting outside where there was a bench. He was usually there with Phil, who waited with him if Judy was late. Phil was a nice guy, and she was happy Will had a friend, especially after Robot’s disappearance.

That day she got there a few minutes early, because she wanted to speak to Doctor Godfrey after the group therapy session, because of Will’s last outburst with Liam. She waited in the Chariot, and when she noticed some of the members of Will’s therapy group begin to leave, she walked in and down the hall to their room, expecting to see Will there, since she had told him she was going in to speak to the Doctor. But the room was empty when she opened the door. She turned and walked down the hall to Doctor Godfrey’s office.

When she knocked, Dr. Godfrey called, “Come in.”

Judy walked in, and the doctor was sitting behind her desk. “Hi Judy,” she welcomed her with a smile. But then she saw Judy’s black eye and said, “What happened to you?”

“Hi. It was an accident, but it’s one of the things I wanted to talk to you about,” Judy said. “I thought Will would be here.”

“He didn’t go to group. One of the counselors said he left with Phil and they would be back by noon when you came to pick him up.”

“He can just leave?”

“Yes. It’s a voluntary facility. We can’t stop them. But I’m sure it’s okay. The two of them have become good friends, and Phil is a nice young man. He just started coming a couple days after Will did, and I think they both needed a friend. I know I’m not supposed to discuss other patients, but I know Will told you Phil lost his brother, and has had a hard time dealing with it. I think they’re good for each other.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right. I just get nervous with all Will’s been through. If they aren’t back by the time we’re done talking, I’ll give him a call.”

She told Dr. Godfrey what had happened the night Will attacked Liam, and then told her that he and Penny had not been speaking since then, and both things were highly unusual.

“The mood swings seemed like they were leveling out,” Judy said. “But he was just…I don’t know. He seemed almost out of his head.”

“I don’t blame you for being concerned. I certainly haven’t seen any reaction like that in him. Everyone loves him here. He’s such a pleasant and polite boy. He doesn’t share much in group still, but everything else seems fine. Maybe just being here gets him away from some of his bad memories.”

“Has he shared any of those memories with you in the one on one sessions, Doctor Godfrey? As far as we know at home, he still has a gap in his memory of what happened when he went back to space with Robot.”

“No. He either doesn’t remember, or will not even broach the subject. You know I don’t like to prescribe medication until I am sure therapy isn’t working. But it might be time to prescribe something for the mood swings. We certainly don’t want him to be a danger to anyone.”

“Maybe you’re right,” Judy said. “I’m going to talk to him about it, and my mom and dad too.” She stood to leave.

“Call me later once you speak to him and your parents about it, okay? If you decide to, I think I should send you the script today or tomorrow, rather than wait until Monday.”

“Thank you, Doctor Godfrey.” Judy stood and walked out. She planned to see if Will was outside waiting for her before calling him. She didn’t want him to think she didn’t trust him. She had walked a couple feet down the hall when she suddenly stopped. She turned back and knocked again on Dr. Godfrey’s door.

“Come in,” the woman called.

“Sorry, I just thought of something you said.”

“About Will?”

“No, actually it was about Phil. You said his brother died.”

“Yes. His older brother.”

“It wasn’t his sister?” Judy asked.

“No. He didn’t have any sisters. He had two older brothers. The middle one died in an accident on the way to Alpha Centauri, and I guess the two of them were really close.”

“What was his brother’s name?” Judy asked, hurriedly. “The one who died?”

“Um…”

“Was it Evan?”

“Yes. That was it. Evan. Did you know him? He was on the 24th Colonist group with you.”

But Judy had left the room and was running down the hall.

Chapter Text

Judy was holding her wrist radio to her mouth as she ran. “Will! Will this is Judy. Will! Do you copy?”

When there was no answer, she called John.

“Dad! Come in, Dad!”

“Copy Judy, what’s wrong?”

“It’s Will. I think he’s in trouble.”

“What happened?”

“The boy that he’s been friendly with at therapy. Phil. He started just a couple days after Will did. But, I don’t think he’s there to get better. It’s Evan’s brother. The boy…who…the boy who died when we went to find the fuel on the first planet. And…Phil lied. He said his sister died, but didn’t give Will any of the details. Just that she died sometime before the robot war.

“Dad, I think he might have been the one who shot Penny.”

“Where’s Will now?” John asked. Judy could hear the concern in her father’s voice.

“He left with Phil.”

“Shit. Okay, keep trying to get him on the radio. I’ll call Alpha Security and get them looking for them. I’m at the farm but I’m heading home now. I’ll call your mother and Penny.”

Judy was outside, running to the Chariot, calling Will over and over again. Finally, “Hey, Judy,” came back to her over the speaker. But it wasn’t Will.

“Phil! Phil! Where’s my brother?”

“He’s right here with me. Say hi to your sister, Will.”

“Judy, I’m okay.”

“That‘s enough,” Judy heard Phil say.

“What are you doing, Phil? If this is about Evan…”

“Evan? You remember him? That’s good to know. I’m going to make sure you never forget him.”

“Phil!” Judy said.

“Meet us at the top of the dam. Only you. If anyone else gets within a mile of us, I’m going to see if your little brother can fly.”

“You tried to kill Penny didn’t you?” She asked.

“I’ve been hunting with my brothers since I was seven. If I wanted to kill her I would have. But Will was gone, so she was the only one left. I wanted you to think about it. Meet us at the dam.”

“Phil! Phil!”

But the radio had gone dead.

Judy called her dad back. “Dad. I reached them. Will’s okay now but…Phil said to meet them at the top of the dam. And…if anyone got within a mile of them he would throw Will over the side.”

“Okay, Judy. Alpha has the bulletin out. Your mom is on her way home to be with Penny. Go there.”

“No, Dad. I have to go to the dam.”

“No, Judy!”

“Dad. This is about me. He blames me for his brother’s death. It isn’t Will’s fault.”

“Judy, we need to let Alpha Secur…”

“Don’t give me that bullshit, Dad! Robinsons stick together. We count on ourselves! It’s the only thing that’s kept us alive. I’m going to the dam.”

When they disconnected, John got another call. “John—do you copy?”

“Yeah, Don.”

“Penny called me. What can I do?”

“I don’t know…hey…you know how to get to the elevator that will take me up to the top of the dam, right? The way you went when Robot was missing.”

“Yes. Why?”

“He told Judy to meet them there, but if anyone get’s within a mile besides Judy, he’ll throw Will off. How close will that get me?”

“Right under the dam. And there’s a short flight of stairs that will take you up to the road. He won’t see you approaching. But depending on where he’s standing, you’ll have fifteen or twenty yards to cover with no way to hide. He’s going to be on the road bridge, because the walk bridge has a barrier blocking access to the water. But we have to hike from a trail head to the elevator first.”

“Can you pick me up? I’m at the farm.”

“Roger. Twenty minutes, John.”

When their call disconnected, John called Alpha Security and gave them the update, and told them what the boy had told Judy. John was well known to them all after the robot battle. They assured him they would block off the road going up to the dam, and get choppers in the air, but wouldn’t approach any closer than a mile, while they tried to reason with the boy.

When he disconnected, his radio buzzed and he looked at it. “Possible hostage situation. Suspect should be considered armed and dangerous. Do not attempt to apprehend. Notify Alpha Security if you spot suspect.” Then a photo of Phil followed the message.

Penny was at home waiting for her mother when the message came over her radio. She looked at the picture of Phil. The boy looked so much like Evan. How could none of them have thought about that, especially Judy?

She called her sister. “Judy?”

“Copy Penny.”

“He looks just like Evan! How did you not recognize him?”

“I don’t know Penny. But I didn’t.”

“Are you on your way home?” She had only gotten the initial message from her dad. She didn’t know yet that her sister had spoken to Phil.

“No. He wants me to meet them. It’s me he wants.” I hope.

“What?”

“It’s me he wants, Penny. I’m meeting them.”

“Where?”

“Stay there, it has nothing to do with you and you’ll just put yourself in danger.”

“He shot me, didn’t he?” She said. “It wasn’t Liam.”

“Yes.”

“And it has nothing to do with me?”

“He wants me to meet them at the top of the dam. If anyone else gets within a mile he’ll…”

Penny knew what she was going to say. “I haven’t talked to Will in two days, Judy,” she said.

Judy heard her sister’s voice break.“I know, Penny. It was just an argument though. Stay home.”

Just then Penny saw her mother pull up in the Alpha Jeep she drove. “Robinson’s stick together,” Penny said, and ran out to meet her mom.

“They’re going to the dam!” Penny yelled. Her mother had climbed out of the Jeep, but Penny ran around and got in the passenger side, and Maureen got back in and started it.

“Where’s Judy?” Maureen asked as she backed out of the driveway.

“On her way there. Phil said he wanted Judy to meet them. If anyone got within a mile besides Judy, he would…hurt Will.”

“Is this ever going to fucking end!” Maureen shouted.

As Judy drove the Chariot up the winding road that led to the top of the dam, she saw helicopters in the air behind her and in front. But they all looked like they were following Phil’s instructions, staying a mile or more back from the dam.

When she rounded a corner near the top, she saw a roadblock had already been set up. Two Chariots blocked access, and there were dozens of Alpha Security vehicles lined up along the side. Men with rifles and a few with lasers where everywhere. When she climbed out, three security officers ran up to her. “Get back in your vehicle!”

“I’m Judy Robinson! Will’s my brother!”

A large man, who looked like he was in charge, said, “I don’t care who you are, you need to get back in your vehicle.”

“Has anyone been able to talk to him?” Judy asked as she was being pushed back toward her Chariot.

“Negotiators are trying now. They’ll handle it.”

“Find out if they’ve been successful!” Judy said.

A female officer was standing a few yards away. “No,” she said. “He’s not responding to anyone.”

Judy quickly punched Will’s number into her radio. “Phil, this is Judy.”

“The amazing Doctor Robinson,” the boy said, pleasantly. “You’re running out of time.”

The large officer held both arms up. “Get the negotiator,” he said. “We have him on the line.”

A man ran up just then. “Give me the radio,” he said to Judy, reaching for it.

“No,” she said. Pulling it away.

“You don’t understand, negotiating in hostage situations is what I do.”

“You don’t understand,” Judy said. “Keeping my brother safe is what I do.”

“He’s a professional,” the female officer said to Judy. Security officials surrounded her now.

“Phil,” Judy called into the radio. “Tell them what you want.”

“I want to see Judy Robinson up here. If anyone else approaches, I’m going to shoot her brother in the head, then push him off the side. She’s the only one I’ll talk to.”

“Well?” Judy said, looking at the officers crowded around her.

“Why you?” The female officer asked.

“He thinks I’m responsible for his brother’s death. I..I am.”

“Okay,” the officer in charge said. “Get her a weapon.”

“I’m not taking a weapon,” Judy said. “I’m not doing anything to put my brother’s life in danger more than it already is.”

“Okay, open a path, this girl’s going through.”

The hostage negotiator was walking with her. “Now listen, try to get him to…”

“Please get out of my way. There is only one thing that’s going to end this,” Judy said. “I just want to make sure he doesn’t hurt my brother first.”

They led her through the barricades, and the officers closed them behind her.

“Judy,” the officer in charge called to her. She stopped and turned around. “You won’t be able to see the top until you round the corner about half a mile up. We have visuals in the air, and snipers. If he starts shooting, hit the ground and stay down. They’ll take him out.”

“And my brother?”

“They’re pretty good.”

“I hope so,” Judy said.

Judy walked on. Her mind was blank. She knew she had to concentrate on what was in front of her, and try to find a way to trade herself for Will. If she thought about how it all happened, she would blame herself, and not be able to think about what she could do to help her brother.

She was not quite to the bend in the road where she would be able to see them, when her father’s voice came over the radio. “Judy, where are you?”

“I’m walking up. A little over half a mile to go I think.”

“Okay, Don and I are coming up the trail to the elevator.”

“Dad, no!”

“Judy, just keep him talking if you can. You’ll be there long before we will. If you can keep him talking, I’ll try to get up behind him. But I’ll have quite a sprint with no cover once I’m on the road.”

“I’ll try Dad. But if I can, I’m going to get him to trade me for Will, and send Will back down to the barricades first, so he’s out of the way.”

“I love you sweety.”

“I love you too, Dad.”

“Judy,” Don said. He paused. “Be careful.”

“Thanks Don. You too. And take care of my dad.”

When Will climbed in Phil’s car that morning, the boy was already pointing a gun at him, held low on the seat so no one walking by would see it. Instead of reacting, Will just looked down at the gun, then up at Phil. He sighed.

“Turn around Will,” Phil had told him. “And put your hands behind your back.”

He did as he was told, and felt the plastic ties slip over his wrists and tighten. Phil let him turn back around. They drove straight up to the top of the dam. Will didn’t even ask him what it was about or who he really was. He was just…tired. Phil didn’t talk to him other than when they stopped a half a mile or so before the top of the dam, and he made Will climb out of the truck he drove. When they started walking up, Phil said, “You’re a good kid. You’re just…unlucky.”

“You’re telling me,” Will mumbled.

But once at the top, when Phil called Judy, Will finally learned what it was all about. And when they disconnected the call, Will looked at the boy. Phil was ready now for the pleading and begging. Will would tell him how Judy tried her best to save Evan. How tortured Judy had been about losing him. But he wasn’t prepared for What Will said.

“I’m sorry Evan died, Phil. I didn’t know him too well. I was just eleven. But I talked to him a few times. He was nice to everyone. I think everyone really liked him. He talked to me like I wasn’t an eleven year old kid. That was nice.”

Phil looked back at Will for a second. Finally he said, “Just shut up, Will.”

Will turned and looked out over the dam where the water flowed hundreds of meters down to the river. It was lined with rocks. No one would survive a fall from here. He looked up at the sky. It was beautiful here. That was one thing. So far Alpha Centauri hadn’t been much of a paradise as far as he was concerned, but it was beautiful. He thought about Robot, and where he might be. And he thought about Penny, and really wished the two of them had not been so stupid the last couple days. He should have talked to her. He should have apologized. He didn’t know what was going to happen, but he wasn’t going to let Judy die up here. That was one thing he knew.

Maureen pulled the Jeep up at the barricade a little while after Judy had started walking. Officers met them in the road and tried to get them to turn around, but Maureen shut the vehicle down and she and Penny jumped out.

“Where’s Judy?” Maureen yelled. “I’m Will Robinson’s mother.”

“She’s walking up to meet your son and the suspect,” the officer in charge said.

“You let her go?” Maureen said.

“We had no choice. The suspect wouldn’t talk to anyone but her, and he wants her up there. If we did anything else he said he would kill your son.”

“Mom,” Penny said. “Other than Dad, Judy is the one person who can save Will.” But at what cost, she thought. She was trying not to cry, but her eyes were filled with tears.

“We have snipers on the guy,” The officer said. “If he fires we’ll take him out.”

“Won’t that be a little late?” Penny asked.

“We’ll try to get the suspect…”

“How bout we stop calling him suspect,” Penny said. “He’s actually in the middle of fucking doing it.”

“Judy!” Maureen called into her radio. “Judy where are you?”

“Almost to the curve in the road Mom. I’ll be able to see them soon.” Her voice was low and calm.

“What are you going to do?” Penny asked.

“I’m going to try and get Will out of there, then deal with it.”

“Deal with it?” Maureen said. “How?”

“Well, that’s the part I’m still trying to figure out,” she said.

“Be careful, Judy,” Penny said.

“I’ll do my best. I love you guys.”

“We love you so much,” Maureen said. “Please be careful.”

“I love you, Judy,” Penny said. “I’m…so sorry.”

“Me too. I love you,” Judy replied.

When she rounded the corner, she saw them ahead. They were at the side of the road, in the center of the dam, standing next to the edge. It looked like Will had his hand’s bound behind his back. Phil was standing beside him with a gun pointed at his head.

“Dad,” Judy whispered, trying not to look like she was talking into her radio. She was still a long way from them, but Phil would be able to tell if she held her wrist to her mouth.

“Copy, Judy.”

“I see them. Will’s okay. How far are you?”

“Ten minutes, Judy,” Don said. “Then a minute or so up the elevator.” She could tell they were both tired from running down the trail.

“I’ll keep him talking as long as I can. Don’t call back, he’ll know.”

“Okay,” John said. “Leave the line open so I can listen. I love you, Judy.”

“I love you too Dad.”

“Judy…” Don said.

“I know, Don,” She replied.

As Judy walked toward them, she didn’t look at Phil. She looked at her brother. She thought of him at two years of age, learning to build sandcastles on the beach with her.

She thought of him when he was five, teaching him to ride a bicycle for the first time without training wheels. Their father was deployed, and their mother was working, and Judy wanted to do the same things for her little brother as John had done for her as a surrogate father. Will was much quicker than she was at learning to ride a bike without training wheels.

She thought of him when he was seven, with his first telescope. His mother had shown him how to use it that evening, but when Judy woke up in the middle of the night, and stuck her head in his room to check on him—something she often did when John was away—she saw the curtain of his window blowing and she walked across the room, stuck her head out, and saw him sitting on his roof with the telescope.

“Will, what are you doing?” She asked.

“I’m looking at Mars,” he said, without even looking up. She hadn’t startled him at all. “Come see,” he said.

She crawled out the window with him and the two of them stayed out for another hour looking at the sky, until she finally said it was time for him to go back to bed.

This was her little brother. She had protected him his entire life, and she wasn’t going to let anything happen to him today.

Will saw his sister walking toward them. She walked with purpose, and she didn’t look frightened. If he lived through this, he would never forget her in this moment. Walking toward the danger. For him.

He looked over the dam, tried to figure out how to do this. Get Phil to keep the gun pointed at him until Judy was close enough he turned the gun toward her. Then he would make his move. If his hands weren’t bound, he would try to tackle Phil when he turned the gun, but with them bound he felt his only play was to try and run into him, knock him over the dam. And he didn’t think he could do that without going over with him. But if that was his only choice, that’s what he would do. It wasn’t like he hadn’t made the choice to sacrifice himself for his family before. Maybe it was inevitable.

“Phil, you know she tried to help Evan, right?”

“Shut up, Will.”

“You’re not stupid. You know that. She doesn’t deserve this.”

“I told you to shut up.”

This is working. Keep him looking at me. Keep him pointing the gun toward my head, and not Judy’s.

“Can you imagine how she felt Phil? Can you even imagine? She tried so hard.”

“You weren’t even there, Will. You think I didn’t talk to everyone about it? Find out how it happened? I know what happened. Judy was playing God. Just like all you Robinsons. You think you can save the fucking world. And people get hurt. People die.”

“She tried to save his life, Phil. She did everything she could.”

“She was eighteen!” Phil yelled. “She had no Goddamn business thinking she could save him!”

”But…”

“If you don’t shut the fuck up, I’m going to shoot you, then her.”

Will stopped talking, but he had moved slightly closer to Phil.

Now Judy was ten meters away. She still hadn’t said anything. She just kept walking.

“Stop there, Judy,” Phil said.

She stopped. Too far to reach him. Damn.

“You okay, Will?” She asked.

“Yeah, I’m okay, Judy.”

“Phil. What do you want?” She said.

“I want to ask you a question. How did it feel, watching Evan die?”

Judy looked back without answering for several seconds. “I felt like…a failure. I felt like…I was the only thing standing between him and the rest of his life. I felt like…if I was older. If I had more experience. I could have saved his life. I was just so young. And I didn’t know…I didn’t know how to save him.” The tears were flowing now.

“I saw him every night before I went to sleep for months. I still see him. Especially if I see a boy his age. Full of life. Happy. Looking for just…more life. I…see…I…see him looking up at me and telling me his older brother was with the 24th group. But his younger brother was already on Alpha Centauri. Waiting for him. I see him and I know…that…that if I had just…just been better.” She couldn’t keep talking she was crying so hard now.

“I see him, Phil,” she cried.

Will was crying too, hearing his sister. She had never spoken about the boy after it happened. She carried it inside. She did what she did. She took care of everyone around her. She took care of ninety seven kids. She took care of him and Penny. She just kept on. And she dealt with this herself.

“I’m sorry, Judy,” Will said, as he cried. “I’m sorry I didn’t know how…”

“Shut up, Will!” Phil shouted again. “Just shut the fuck up!”

“And for how I’ve been,” Will continued. “You took care of all of us. All the kids. I’m sorry.”

“Shut up!” Phil shouted.

Will stopped talking and Phil looked at Judy, but he kept the gun pointed at Will. “Evan was everything to me, Judy. Everything. He taught me to swim. He taught me to surf. He said…he said…once he got to Alpha Centauri, we would surf all the time. He hadn’t seen blue water in years. And that’s all he talked about. He wanted us to see a blue ocean together. And you…you just let him die.”

“I tried, Phil,” she cried.

“Did you know he was in love with you, Judy? Did you know that’s why he went out there to try and get the fuel? He kept a journal. They gave it to me. He wrote that you were so cool. So beautiful. And the last thing he wrote was that he was going with you to get the fuel. There were six or seven people who went. But he didn’t mention any of them. He wrote, “tomorrow I go with Judy to get the fuel and save everyone.’ That’s the last thing he wrote.”

“I didn’t know, Phil. I’m sorry.”

“But you didn’t even have to go, did you? Because you didn’t bring back the fuel. Your genius brother here thought of another way. All you had to do was wait. But you all…you Robinsons. You don’t wait do you? You never fucking wait. He didn’t need to die!”

Will thought that was his moment, and braced himself to charge into the boy. Phil still had the gun pointed at Will’s head. Judy had taken a couple more steps forward. Will knew she was trying to get close enough to charge him too. He would have to make his move before Judy did. He knew she was going to die for him. But…Phil was his friend. And he was in pain. That’s what this was about. The boy just couldn’t deal with the pain. Will didn’t know what to do to save his sister and his friend both.

Then Phil took a step back. The gun was still pointed at Will. “Get on your knees, Will,” he said.

“Stop, Phil!” Judy called. “Let him go! It’s me you want.”

“My brother was everything to me. He protected me from my Dad. My dad would beat me, and Evan would say something to get his attention and take the beating. He was everything. Do you know how it feels for your brother to die? Do you?”

“Phil! Phil!” Judy said. “This isn’t about Will. It’s about me! Let him go!”

“Get on your goddamn knees and shut your eyes, Will!” Phil yelled.

John and Don had left the elevator and were running to the stairs to go up to the road. They were listening to it all. There was no time left. John ran past Don, tired from the long hike, but sprinting the remainder of the distance. There was no time to think about what he would do. He just needed to get there now.

Will lowered himself to his knees. He heard Phil step closer.

“Please don’t kill my brother, Phil!” Judy cried. “Please don’t kill my brother.”

Will felt the gun against the back of his head. He looked once more over the dam, where the water flowed to the bottom. For just a second, he was back in the tree, surrounded by flames, knowing these were the last moments of his short life, and coming to terms with it. He didn’t shut his eyes. He looked up at the blue sky.

“What do you want Phil? What do you want?” Judy cried.

“What do I want?” Phil said, not looking at her, but looking at the back of Will’s head. “I want you to know how I felt. I want you to know how it feels for your brother to die.”

Will knew what was about to happen, and he knew there wasn’t anything he could do about it. But he thought, maybe Phil wasn’t going to kill Judy after all. He wanted her to suffer. He wanted her to live with the knowledge that she had seen her brother die, and she would blame herself for the rest of her life.

Then he heard Phil’s voice soften. “Judy’s right, Will. None of this is your fault. I’m sorry this had to happen.”

Everyone heard the shot. John was reaching for the rail to pull himself up to the road, and knew it was too late. Penny was behind the barricade with Maureen and the security officials. She turned her head into her mother and screamed, while Maureen hugged her.

Judy had started running, but when the shot went off, she shouted “No!” and, fell to her knees and buried her face in her hands, not wanting to watch it.

“Now you know how it feels,” Phil said. He stepped over the edge.

Judy was crying and had her face covered still, afraid of what she would see. She slowly looked up. And…Will was still there in the road, by the edge of the dam. He was still on his knees.

When the gun went off by Will’s head, his ears started ringing so loudly, he couldn’t hear anything. At first he thought he had been shot. But he looked up and saw Phil step over the edge. He opened his mouth to scream, “No Phil!” But he couldn’t tell if he actually made any sound at all.

Judy pushed herself to her feet and started running toward her brother, who fell to his side. She jumped on her knees beside him. “Are you okay, Will? Will! Will!”

“He jumped Judy. He jumped.”

“I know, Will.”

“He wasn’t going to hurt us. He was in so much pain. He was my friend, Judy.”

“I know, Will. I’m sorry.”

He was looking up at her. He could see her lips move, but he couldn’t hear her voice. “I can’t hear you, Judy. My ears. I can’t hear.”

“Oh Will,” she held his head against her chest and they both cried.

“He jumped, Judy. Phil just jumped,” he said, but she couldn’t hear the words, since his face was pressed against her body. It didn’t matter. He was alive.

She didn’t say anything. She just kept her arms wrapped around him hugging him to her tightly, and sobbing with pain and agony and relief.

The shot had gone off seconds before John stepped off the top step onto the road. He looked toward the middle of the dam, where he knew the kids were. He couldn’t tell what had happened. Judy and Will were on the road, Judy kneeling, holding her brother who was lying down. She was hugging Will to her, but Will wasn’t moving, and John couldn’t tell if he had been shot. Phil was not there, and John knew he must have jumped off the dam. But did he shoot Will first? He looked for blood, but he couldn’t see anything except his two children on the road, holding on to each other. He started running toward them.

When he reached them, he jumped to the ground, and put his arms around them both. “Are you okay! Are you hurt!”

“No,” Judy said. “Will’s ears from the gun. He can’t hear.”

John grabbed his son’s face in his hands and looked at him. John was crying, but he couldn’t believe neither of his children had been hurt badly. He turned Will, grabbed the plastic ties, and ripped them apart, and freed Will’s hands.

Will put his arms around his dad. He hugged his father tightly, then let go with one arm and put it around Judy and the three of them hugged each other.

Helicopters were landing on the road now, and they heard sirens in the distance, getting closer.

When the shot had gone off, one of the men in a helicopter called the captain and said, “The boy jumped. He’s gone.”

“Which boy?”  Penny yelled, knowing her brother well.

“The gunman,” the voice came back.

“What about my kids!” Maureen yelled.

“We couldn’t tell,” the man said. “There’s two unidentified men running toward them. Should we…”

“That’s my Dad and Don!” Penny yelled.

Stand down!” The Captain ordered. He started running to a vehicle. He turned to Maureen as he ran. “It’s not protocol, but I’ll take you. We don’t know what we’ll find. Maybe the girl…”

“She’s going too,” Maureen said and they both ran with the Captain and climbed into his truck.

When Don made it up to the top, he saw John and the kids in the road on their knees holding on to each other. He started running toward them. Judy saw him coming and stood and ran to meet him and they hugged.

An ambulance pulled up beside them, followed by a security vehicle. The Captain pulled to a stop and Penny and Maureen jumped out of his truck and ran over to Will and John.

“They’re okay,” John said. “They’re okay.”

Maureen hugged her son and John, while Penny put her arms around her brother and started crying, saying “I’m sorry Will. I’m sorry Will. I’m sorry about the fight. I’m so sorry.”

“I can’t hear you!” He yelled. “I love you.”

John pointed to his ears. “The gun shot.”

Will stopped talking. He was still crying and looked back over the dam. “He jumped,” he said again. “He wasn’t going to hurt me.”

The EMTs were there now, saying they needed to go to the hospital.

Will didn’t want to go with them in the ambulance, but John and Maureen insisted, so he let them put him in the back. John looked at Judy and said, “You too.”

“But I’m okay.”

“Will’s right, Judy,” John said. “None of us are okay.”

Judy wanted to be with Will anyway, so she climbed in the back, and Maureen jumped in with them.

John looked back at Don. “I’m riding down with security. Can you bring Penny to the hospital?”

“We’ll be there, John.”

As the ambulance turned and started down the road, Don put his arm around Penny. Penny said, “he’s going to be okay.” She looked up at Don. “She’s okay, too, Don.”

He looked down and smiled at her, then hugged her shoulders, pulling her close.

Chapter Text

It was so common, the French had a name for it, l’appel du vide. That feeling one has, when standing at the edge of a precipice, or looking into the churning water from a high deck on a cruise ship. People with no suicidal tendencies whatsoever have felt it. Just for that half a second…the need to step over the edge. The seduction of the unknown. The call of the void.

Though he never told his family, Will had been obsessed with it since returning from space. He had always been level headed, and from a very early age, he had been able to control his emotions and impulses. But this had him in its grip, and so, he wanted to understand it, and had read all he could on the subject.

An Intrusive thought. That’s what mental health professionals called it. For most people, it was a split second feeling, which would often make them step back from the edge. But for others, there was no going back.

Like Phil. Will thought it was probably all part of the boy's plan. To take him to the dam, and tell Judy if she didn’t meet them there he would push her brother over the side. And then, he would pretend to shoot him in front of her. To show her his pain. To make her feel it. And then kill himself.

But maybe it wasn’t. Maybe he had looked over the dam, looked back at Will and decided fuck it. And with little thought at all, just stepped off.

Or maybe there was some thought involved. Maybe once he was there, he realized he really didn’t want to shoot Will at all. That there was only one way to end the pain.

The void had probably been calling to him for months. Since the 24th Colonist Group had finally arrived on Alpha Centauri, and Phil found out what had happened to his brother.

The thing was, Will would never know. And that would always torture him. Almost as much as watching his friend step over the side of the dam.

The thoughts roiled his brain in his half sleep, while he turned and twisted and tried to forget the day.

Maureen watched her son, moving around, kicking his legs, lying on one side and then another. She wanted to go to him, try to comfort him in some way. But his eyes were closed tightly even as he flopped about, so she wasn’t sure if he was awake or not. And after the day he had had, the one thing he needed was sleep. They had sedated him that afternoon, but he didn’t seem to rest any easier. So she sat in a chair near his bed, watching him toss and turn.

His hearing had started to get better after a few hours, but they decided to keep him overnight for observation, and Judy had asked them to check out his heart again. He seemed to constantly rub his chest now, and though, so far the tests had detected nothing wrong with it, his sister constantly worried that there was something they hadn’t found. Maureen was going to stay in his room that night, but Judy had refused to leave him as well, and both of them slept in chairs by his bed.

Maureen looked at her daughter, curled uncomfortably into a ball in the chair next to her, sleeping, finally. As she watched her two children, she wondered how it had gone so wrong. They had all suffered near death several times on their way to the planet, but with Will it seemed to be relentless. And even with the robot war behind them, and with the family safely on Alpha together, it never seemed to end for him.

She watched him sleep. For now, he was in a fetal position, facing her, eyes closed, and breathing softly. But she knew before long he would start tossing and turning and kicking his legs again.

While he seldom cried as a baby at night, he had often been a restless sleeper, as if there were unknown demons lurking in his dreams. And it wasn’t unusual for her to wake in the middle of the night, see him tossing about, and pick him up and hold him until he calmed down.

She remembered one night, when he was not quite a year old. John had been up in San Francisco for a training exercise for three weeks, and was due home any time. She woke in the middle of the night, and saw her husband was there, sitting in the chair between Will’s crib and their bed, holding his son in his arms and gently rocking him and singing a song—a song that probably only John would know—in a low voice so as not to wake Maureen.

She laid there, pretending to be asleep, because the moment was not her’s. It was between a father and his infant son. Here was this big man, tired from driving all night, still in fatigues, sitting in the dark and rocking his son and singing to him in almost a whisper. She still remembered part of the song, and thought of it now as she watched her son sleep.

Where are the boot straps to lift myself up? Where is the well where I once filled my cup?  When does this sorrow all turn into joy? And where or where is the sleepy eyed boy?

As she thought of the words, she realized it was almost prescient of John. Back then, Will was the sleepy eyed boy. But her husband was singing of a time in the future, when Will would no longer be innocent, changed by all the world had thrown at him, and wondering where his childhood had gone.

And that was their son today. Experiencing more than any boy his age should ever have to. “When does this sorrow all turn into joy?” She whispered as she watched his face, still so innocent to her.

As she thought of all that had happened to him, something just seemed…off. She wasn’t a superstitious person, and as a scientist, she wasn't religious. But there were so many things she just couldn’t explain. She decided she needed to call Hiroki. They hadn’t spoken since they met the night at the house, and he had not called her with the DNA results of the alien body part. That seemed strange, but there was a possibility the results were inconclusive or there was just not much to tell.

And she had been thinking about something else. When the kids were separated, and had been able to communicate with them through Robot and Scarecrow. While that had just seemed like one strange incident buried beneath a host of others, it had always puzzled her, but she felt there was a scientific explanation for it, and had been developing a theory. The problem was, if she allowed her mind to go there, she had to consider what it meant for her son, and his ability to connect with Robot. It wasn’t something she particularly wanted to think about.

And as she looked at Judy, breathing lightly in the chair next to her, then back to Will, she knew her decision to concentrate on her family and not so much on the aliens and the robots and the mystery of it all had been the right one. And so she hadn’t spent much time on it since Will had had his episode when he found out what Liam had done. Or they thought Liam had done.

The problem was, she couldn’t get past the idea that something had happened to Will in space that was connected to the aliens or robots somehow. And if they were going to help him, she was afraid that eventually they were going to have to confront these mysteries. She no longer believed that it was all over, and that they could live happily ever after on Alpha Centauri. And if what she was thinking was correct, maybe her son would never be able live a life like that.

She sighed, and decided since Will seemed more relaxed now, she would go down to the cafeteria for a cup of coffee.

A short time after she had left the room, Will opened his eyes and saw Judy sleeping in the chair beside him. He laid there, looking at his sister. He smiled, but it was a sad smile. She would always take care of him. But what would it cost her? Today it had almost cost her her life.

He had so many thoughts running through his head, he had no idea how to deal with any of them. As bad as the day had been for him and Judy, he couldn’t stop thinking about Phil. He was just a troubled boy, and couldn’t deal with his loss. He had made Judy his nemesis. Will thought, if he could just have talked to him, he could have helped.

Another thought that kept entering Will’s mind as laid in the hospital bed trying to sleep was, he had watched his only two friends walk off a cliff. And perhaps they had both been his fault. Phil, because he decided he couldn’t shoot Will, and that was his only recourse to end the pain, and Robot, because Will had told him to.

Robot. He had tried many times to connect to his friend, but had been unable to, and he missed him terribly, and he felt so guilty about how he had treated him.

It was hard to believe he would just leave without a word and never come back, but Will thought it was possible. As their relationship grew, especially when the two of them had gone to space together, Robot had developed more human emotions, it seemed. Being able to sense the taste and texture of the food Will was eating was certainly a change, but when Will felt the disappointment in him when they realized they might be late getting home for Christmas, it was startling.

Now, he thought Robot might be struggling with his feeling of sadness, that Will had treated him so badly. And if that was true, he probably was having a hard time dealing with it, and Will wasn’t with him, so he couldn’t help him understand. If he never saw his friend again, he would never forgive himself. It was just as bad as when Will made him walk off the cliff. Maybe worse, because Robot really hadn’t done anything wrong. He did whatever Will wanted, waiting outside his room every night, just hoping his friend would become the same boy he had known for over three years.

Will couldn’t understand what was happening to himself, either. He couldn’t concentrate, and sometimes his mind just seemed to speed up, like everything around him was happening in double time. And he couldn’t seem to control his impulses. To say what was on his mind, with little regard for how it affected the people he loved. To attack Liam, when he saw him in the driveway, when he thought the boy had shot his sister. The only peace he found was to go into his room, lie on his bed, and try to clear his mind of everything. Every intrusive thought.

He was certain whatever it was that was going on with him had something to do with what had happened to him and Robot on the planet. How could a month go by with no memory whatsoever? He had tried not to think about it for so long, but now he knew he needed to. The thing he did remember was that something was pulling at him, telling him not to go back. The call of the void. For some reason he envisioned it as a deep, black hole he wanted to step into. And he knew somehow, once he did, he would never be back. None of it made any sense.

He remembered the last time he had had that thought. He and Robot had been heading toward the strange hills, and he woke the next morning thinking, what if I never go back? Robot felt it, and put his hand on his chest to comfort him. But what frightened Will was, he knew—absolutely knew—at that moment if he was standing in front of this void he would have leaped into it. There was no doubt in his mind.

“Will, you okay?”

He looked over where Judy was in the chair. Her eyes were open looking at him. He smiled, “yes.”

She stood up and walked over and sat down beside him on the edge of the bed. She brushed the hair out of his eyes. She didn’t say anything, she just looked at him.

He looked her in the eyes for a minute or two, then said, “You were amazing, Judy.”

“Amazing? I almost got you killed, Will.”

“You came and got me. You had to have talked Security into letting you go, because they would never have let you past the barricades in a hostage situation. If we both died, they would have to explain it. How did you do that?”

“I told them keeping you safe was my job.”

“And they just let you?”

She took his hand. “I didn’t ask them, Will. Phil hadn’t been talking to their negotiator, but he talked to me, and I guess they realized they had no choice.”

“You were going to die for me.”

“And you were going to die for me, weren’t you?” She asked. “You planned to do something.”

“Well, Robinsons stick together."

“We try at least, Will. But, you were right about that planet when we were stranded. I wasn’t there for you then. And I should have recognized the resemblance between Phil and Evan. I…

“You know what I was thinking of when I was on that dam, and you were walking toward us?” Will said. “Actually I think of this a lot.”

“What?” Judy said. She was again running her fingers through his hair slowly.

“When we used to go camping all the time. And Mom and Dad were arguing a lot back then, it seemed like. But, I always knew you were there. You sort of started being more than a big sister to me. To me and Penny both. But she was older, so she probably didn’t see it like I did. But I remember this one time, we were camping in Big Sur, and Mom seemed to be mad at Dad the whole time, so it wasn’t as much fun as it usually was.

“But I remember falling asleep with Dad telling stories like he always did. And then you woke me up and we went to the tent to sleep for the night. I was between you and Penny, like usual. And soon after I fell asleep in the tent, I woke up, because they were arguing a little, outside, but trying not to talk loud. But they were whispering and sometimes that’s just as bad. So I woke up. I was all curled up beside you, and when I looked up I saw you just looking at the top of the tent, and listening to them. And I could tell you were bothered by it. But then you looked over at Penny, then down at me. I closed my eyes because I didn’t want you to know I was awake and could hear them. And you put your arm around me and hugged me.

“But I’ve always remembered that, you checking on me and Penny to make sure we were okay, and…I don’t know…hoping we didn’t hear the argument. And I felt right then that whatever happened with Mom and Dad….if Dad never came back or if they got divorced or whatever, and no matter what changed in my life, you would always be there. And in that moment, I felt so lucky. I thought, I’m warm and safe. And it was you that made me feel that way. More than anyone else in my life.

“Today, when you were walking toward me, and Phil had that gun to my head, I remembered that night. I didn’t know how it was going to end, and I thought there was probably a good chance I might die on that dam, and it really didn’t matter that much, you know? That was kind of weird, but I thought, Judy’s coming to get me. And no matter what, you were going to take care of me, like always. Even if I died, just knowing you were on your way in my last seconds, things would be okay. And I’ll always remember you walking toward me to protect me. Just like you had always done.”

“Will…”

“Wait. I need to tell you something else. I had a dream, when I was on the planet they found me on. I don’t remember what happened to me. But I remember that dream. We were on the first planet where we crashed, and Dad wanted me to go down and get the battery. And just like what actually happened, you put your suit on and was going to do it so I wouldn’t have to. But in my dream, Dad grabbed you before you could get to the water. And I did it. I went in the hole.

“And Judy, I got caught in a wire, and I…I died.”

“Oh, Will.” She put her hand on his shoulder.

“It was so real. Like it really happened. I remember when I woke up I was so surprised, because I really thought I had died. But what I remember most about the dream, was you. You had put your helmet on and jumped back in the water, and was lying on top of the Jupiter 2, telling me to climb up, and then telling me to drop the battery and swim. That’s what I remember most. You were there, like always. And when I drifted back in the water, and was dying, I remember thinking it was okay. And I told you that. I don’t know if I said the words out loud, or just imagined them. But what I really remember was…it was okay to die, because you were there. Just like today, on the dam.

“Judy, I’m sorry for the way I’ve been acting to you. You did what you always do. You took care of everyone on that planet. This is what you do. When Evan died, you never talked about it, and I didn’t ask you about it. When I heard you talking to Phil about Evan today, I realized that you just always do that. You do what you need to do to take care of everyone around you, and you keep things inside, and just suffer. You protect all of us but yourself.”

Judy wiped the tears from her eyes, then leaned over and hugged her brother. He put his arms around her.

She hugged him for a couple of minutes, neither of them speaking, then she raised up and looked at him again. “Will, I…” she had to stop for a moment. “I will always take care of you. I think, when Dad left it was pretty hard for me, you know. I felt abandoned. And when you told me you felt like I had abandoned you on that planet I felt so terrible. Because, it was like, my own father left, then the only father I had ever known left, and I wanted to make sure you never felt that way. And then I did make you feel that way. And I’m so sorry for that, Will. And I promise you, that will never happen again.”

“I hope the day comes, Judy, when you feel like I’m taking care of you the way you have always taken care of me.”

“Are you kidding? I already feel that way. Do you know, when we were stranded, I knew we were going to get the engines going because you were on it? I could do what I had to do because there was one thing I didn’t have to worry about. The most important thing, getting the ship operable to take us to Alpha Centauri. Because my thirteen year old brother was going to get it done. I think Will…you’ve been taking care of me for a long time too. In so many ways.”

She leaned over and hugged him again, then said, “You should try to sleep some more. It’s only about four AM.”

“Okay,” he said. Then, “I wish. I wish I had known Phil before. You know? Maybe it was all about using me. But I don’t think so. I think we were friends. And…he was just really messed up.”

Judy looked down at her little brother for a while before answering. “I think you’re right, Will. And…you’re still the best human I know.” She kissed his forehead, then sat back down in her chair.

“Hey, Judy,” Will said. “Do you think Robot will be back?”

She looked at him and smiled. “Of course he’ll be back, silly. He’s part of you now.” Finally Will was able to go back to sleep.

The test results were back by mid morning, and they found nothing wrong with Will’s artificial heart, so he was released. Maureen and Judy took him home. No one went to work that day. They all wanted to stay close together. That afternoon, Judy went to town to get groceries to make dinner for them all that night.

The weather had been nice, but clouds had moved in and it looked like rain. Will loved this kind of weather. He had always been hopeful and positive and kind to everyone, but they also knew there was another side. He often had the dark nature of a tortured artist, and they thought this type of weather somehow soothed that side of him. Or maybe he just identified with it.

Before it started raining, Will had walked outside and was sitting by himself in the grove of trees in the front yard, watching the clouds move in. Penny was watching him from the window, and she walked out and sat down beside him. They hadn’t been alone together since the dam.

He smiled at her as she sat next to him.

“Will…”

“I was so stupid, Penny. I’m sorry I was mad at you.”

“I was the stupid one, Will. You were mad at me because you cared about me and you thought I wasn’t being safe.”

“Yeah, but I called you stupid.”

“Actually, you didn’t. You told me not to be stupid. Big difference.”

“Not really,” he said.

“Really.”

Then they just looked at each other and started laughing.

“Leave it up to us to argue about arguing,” Penny said.

“Yeah. Hey…can we promise never to do that again?” Will said.

“Exactly what I was going to say,” Penny added. “That was weird. I felt like part of me was missing.”

“Exactly!”

“But, I’m worried, Will. Are we going to be like normal siblings now, with stupid petty arguments about stupid petty things? Where we don’t even talk to each other for two days? I don’t want that. And now that we’ve both decided we are going to just stay here and have a chance to live normal lives, I’m afraid that’s going to start happening.”

“First of all...to be fair…my sister getting shot in the chest is not a stupid, petty thing.”

“Touché. You get that one.” She smiled at him.

“But yeah,” he said. “We just have to make sure it doesn’t keep happening. Let’s make a pact. No matter what, if one of us gets mad at the other, we never go to bed without resolving it, okay? Things happen and I never want to regret that the last thing I said to you was bad.”

“That’s what I thought when you were…I was afraid something was going to happen to you and the last thing we did was fight. All I could think was, I hadn’t talked to you in two days. It was the worst feeling in the world. Yes, let’s try never to do that again, but if we do, we figure it out before we go to bed that night.”

“Yeah, just apologize to me, then we’ll both be able to sleep better,” he grinned.

“Yes, or…you just knock on my door and say, ‘I was an asshole, Penny, and I really want you to forgive me.’ I’ll open the door and give you a hug and it will all be over.”

“Then you’ll be mad at me for swearing and being out of character.”

“No. No. You get a free pass for calling yourself an asshole when we get in an argument. Asshole is the worst word you’re allowed to use though.”

He smiled and reached over and took her hand. They sat in silence for a few minutes. Then she said, “I really love you, Will.”

“I know you do. I really love you too, Penny.”

“So, it sounds like you’re serious still, about never going back to space again,” Penny said.

“As serious as a…”

“Don’t you dare say it, Will.”

He smiled. “I’m very serious.”

Chapter Text

When John came back from the farm, two days after the incident on the dam, he found Maureen standing in the kitchen, looking out the window. There was a cutting board on the counter by the sink, and vegetables lying around it, but she didn’t seem to have touched anything.

He stood looking at her for a minute. She would have seen his Chariot pull up, and heard him come through the door, but she acted as if she didn’t even know he was there.

“Maureen,” he said. When she didn’t move or say anything, he said again, slightly louder, “Maureen?”

She turned and looked at him. “Oh. Hi, John. Sorry. I didn’t hear you come in.”

“Didn’t you see me pull up?”

“I guess I didn’t notice.”

“Let me make us a couple drinks, and let’s sit outside for a while.”

“No, I planned to make dinner tonight, and I haven’t started.”

“I’ll make dinner. My famous taco pie. I think we have everything.”

She didn’t answer, she just turned back and looked out the window again. He walked up and put his arms around her. He didn’t say anything, he just hugged her. He knew what she needed. In a few minutes, he felt her body move, and he knew she was crying. He still didn’t say anything to her.

When she stopped crying, she said, “It was supposed to be better here, John. That’s why we did this. I told Penny once that I wanted to find a place that was worthy of them. And I thought Alpha Centauri was. It was new, fresh. I saw us like early colonists, who would leave everything behind to find a more suitable place to raise families. To grow. To build. But I was wrong, John. Nothing has been better.”

He started to talk, but realized she just wanted him to listen. Something he had gotten better at since returning from his last long deployment, and trying to reconnect with his children.

“You know, when we crashed on the first planet, and all those things began to happen…Judy in the water…Will in the tree and the fire. Every day seemed like survival, and I realized that was the way it was going to be until we got to Alpha Centauri. If we ever made it to Alpha Centauri.

“But then we finally got here. We had the robots to deal with, and we did. We solved that too. And I thought—finally—we could begin to rebuild. Everything. The city. The planet. The relationship with the kids. I pictured Judy learning to slow down and pace herself. Not try to prove something every day. Her and Penny both dating, eventually marrying. I saw grandkids in the future. I saw us living close, being part of their lives. I thought all of that was really going to happen.

“Will…I never knew what would happen there. He was so different than any other boys his age. Maybe too smart. Too smart to be a real child anyway. And that always bothered me. Because I wanted him to be a child. But I knew that was never going to happen after all he had been through just trying to get here. I held out hope that he would want to work for Alpha someday, and that seemed likely. But after they were separated from us, he seemed a lot different. More independent. And you know the Space Agency. It’s pretty uniform, so I wasn’t sure Will would like that either. I felt, maybe he needed to figure it out for himself. That’s why I agreed to let him go back to space with Robot.

“But now? John, I don’t think it’s any safer here than anywhere else. Especially for Will.”

“Maureen, if you’re wishing we had stayed on Earth…”

“I don’t know that would have made a difference. For Will, I mean. I don’t think it would have been any safer for him.”

“What do you mean?”

“I’ve been thinking an awful lot about things, John. You know I’m not religious. Another thing my mother wasn’t too thrilled about. She said since we didn’t make the kids go to church, and left it up to them, we were letting them slip through.

“But I’m a scientist. My dad understood. He wasn’t much more religious than I was, even though he didn’t talk about it around my mom. But I remember one night we were out looking up at the stars with his telescope. It was one of those clear nights where you could see billions of stars. Like the sky was painted with them.

“I was twelve or thirteen I think, and had been reading everything I could get my hands on about science, the universe, the Big Bang, and I said something like, “why did we have to invent religion to explain all this?”

“And I remember he said, ‘just because you don’t believe in a man-made god, Maureen, don’t think you can understand everything because you read it in a book.’

“I’ve never forgotten those words. Then he said something like, ‘when you look at all this, we look pretty insignificant, but remember, as far as we know, we’re the only species in the universe that’s conscious of our own mortality. We know it’s all going to come to an end someday. It’s a wonderful, terrible knowledge.’ I remember that’s what he called it. A wonderful, terrible knowledge. And he said, ‘we don’t know why that is. We don’t know why we’re different than every other species.”

“Your father, the farmer said that?” John asked. He was still holding her from behind, keeping her against him.

“He wasn’t a normal farmer. He could have done anything he wanted. But as I got older, I didn’t think much about that. Scientists…you know. If we can’t test it, we don’t spend much time thinking about it. But now, I don’t know, John.”

She turned to him and put her arms around him and looked into his eyes. “I can’t forget what Judy said. That twenty three colonist groups went to Alpha Centauri virtually unscathed. They all had Scarecrow. They all had the engine. And the robots didn’t seem to care. And then there was our’s. And we had something else.”

“Will,” John said.

“Will,” she agreed.

“Maureen, you don’t really think they were after him from the beginning, do you? That’s the most unscientific thing you could think. He was an eleven year old boy.”

“Unless we’re right,” she said. “And they could see the past, and maybe the future. And Will meant something to them. Look at everything that’s happened to him. And in the beginning, we could say SAR wanted him because he was able to connect with the robots, but not anymore, after the kids connected to the other robots. Since then, I’ve thought, SAR probably wanted him because he was the first one who could do it, but the problem with that is…”

“Penny said she couldn’t actually read the thoughts Sally had,” John interrupted. “They didn’t seem connected in the way Will and Robot were.”

“Exactly, John. That’s what I mean. And every one of the kids who were out there that night with the Robots have been debriefed. Not one of them reports any connection, in the way Will has been able to do it. Sally came back to help Penny, so somehow she could feel she needed her, but Penny’s never been able to read her thoughts. There’s still something different about Will.”

“Well, that’s something we’ll probably never figure out,” John said.

“Maybe, maybe not. Just because I think there could be forces we don’t understand, I’m still a scientist, and I believe there is still a scientific explanation, other than, they could read each other’s minds.”

“Like what?” John asked.

“Well, quantum teleportation for instance.”

“Teleportation?” John said, skeptically.

“Quantum teleportation. We were experimenting with it before the war, when everything sort of fell apart. Without going into all the science…”

“Thank you.”

“Picture sending a letter to someone, and as soon as you send it, the receiver has the information.”

“Why not send an email?” John asked. “Isn’t that the same thing?”

“No. When you send an email the receiver still has to wait for it. I’m talking about sharing information that someone else receives as it’s sent. And quantum teleportation is done without wires or radio waves. You aren’t teleporting an object you’re teleporting the state of an object. You use entangled particles to send information. When two particles are created at the same time and place they have the same existence, even if they split. So if one changes, the other one changes as well. Even if they are light years apart. They’re entangled. If two coins were entangled and you flipped one and it turned up heads, the person looking at the other coin would watch it turn to heads as well. Or maybe tails. If an entangled particle spins one way, its partner spins the opposite, but the movement of one still changes the other one.

“The Chinese were successful in teleporting entangled photons from Tibet to a satellite orbiting the Earth way back in twenty twenty. Photons actually travel better in space than they do on a fiber optic channel. So if they changed the one in Tibet, the one on the satellite changed as well. The next step would be sending actual information. As soon as you alter the information, the information on the satellite would be altered. There were plans to build a quantum internet. Faster and more secure than any network. But we didn’t think it would ever be possible to send information faster than the speed of light, even with quantum teleportation.

“But I’ve been thinking about it ever since we discovered the particle accelerator on that planet. What if the aliens found a way to do that? We know two entangled particles light years apart are still connected to each other. Maybe they found a way to teleport information between them.

“I was thinking about when Robot was able to communicate through Scarecrow when the kids were stranded. Back when the Chinese teleported photons to a satellite, Voyager One was still operable. It was over twenty billion light years from Earth then, and it took NASA two days to send a signal to it using radio waves.

“But we held an actual conversation with the kids, using Robot and Scarecrow as transmitters and receivers. Information was being transported trillions of light years apart. Instantly. No fiber optic. No WiFi. No radio waves of any kind. It was teleported. That’s the only scientific explanation I can come up with.

“Maybe the robots are entangled with each other, in a way. I mean, we can’t understand why particles in the quantum world behave differently than particles in the classical world. They shouldn’t. All matter is made up of particles, after all. So, maybe the aliens found a way to entangle trillions and trillions of particles to create the robots so they are all connected, in some way.

“Think about it, John. We’ve figured out how to create particles by smashing atoms. We’ve figured out how to entangle particles. And we’ve figured out how to teleport particles. It’s not that much of a leap to think a society that is so much more advanced than we are can do it with a vast number of particles. Especially when you think of the size of that particle accelerator. In the end, it’s just a math problem.”

“And when SAR took over Scarecrow, and showed the kids where we were to trap them,” John said. “That would have been the same thing.”

Maureen just looked at him for a few seconds, like she was thinking of what he said. But then she went on. “But John, this is the real question. Robot was able to communicate with Will this way. I saw the drawings on the wall of that cave. Robot was receiving information from Will when we were on the Water Planet. And once Will was back on the Resolute and placed his hand in Robot’s palm print, he immediately got a vision of where he was on the Amber Planet. Doesn’t that make Will…different? I mean, he’s a human child who can apparently exchange information with the robots—at least one of them. Maybe he’s…entangled with them—for lack of a better word—in some way we don’t understand.

“And it’s not just the robots. He had a lot of things happen to him before we even left for space. Neither one of us thought he was going to make it out of the hospital when he was born. Even though we never said it out loud. He almost drowned. And the dog attack when he was six. That was so scary.” It had happened at their grandmother’s farm. A stray dog had attacked him when he was playing out near the road. They rushed him to the hospital, and he had a bad scar just below his belt line from the stitches. He had been frightened of dogs ever since, so the family never had one.

“But Maureen, what are you suggesting?”

“I’m suggesting…my father might be right. There are forces in the universe that we can’t understand or explain. And his life has just been sort of…stormy. We might not be able to help our son. No matter where he is. And now Robot is gone. We’re alone in this.”

“Well, we’re not alone, Maureen. And neither is Will. There’s a force of nature who will take care of him no matter what. And we saw that on the dam. I would never bet against Judy.”

“Better not bet against Penny, either,” Maureen said. “She isn’t convinced that staying here is what’s best for him. She still thinks he would never be happy if he did. But she’s determined to protect him. And she says she’s going to do everything she can to make sure he gets back to the boy we’ve always known, and live a normal life while he’s here. If she she can figure out how to do that.”

Penny was sitting in the coffee shop waiting when he walked in. He came through the door, looking serious. He nodded to her, then stopped at the counter to get a drink. He looked back at Penny. “Want anything?” He called.

She held up her cup and gave him a sarcastic shrug. He smiled, though he was trying not to. He was angry. After getting his drink, he walked over and sat down across from her. “Let the groveling begin,” he said.

“I’m sorry, Liam,” Penny said.

“Yeah, West came by my house last night. Said the same thing. Apologized to my mom and dad, too. Everything’s great now.” He didn’t sound like everything was great.