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Chapter Text

Marriage is a bonding of two people, a symbol of their undying love for each other manifesting in the most pure, unadulterated fashion which civil society has come to recognize. This union between two people is seen as an almost holy thing; something which cannot be touched, harmed, or destroyed. The bond of marriage is a strong one, seeing as it is the only union of two individuals completely driven by the concept of love. Wedding rings come to physically represent their devotion to each other, yet other, not so visible symbols of love, are often more useful in depicting the relationship of two spouses. Regardless, the end result is the same: marriage bonds two hopelessly devoted individuals to each other.

This was not the case for myself.

Just this very morning, I was faced with the reality of my situation. I spoke those two sacred, gentle words intended for someone of my own choosing, to a man —no, not a man, but a boy— who I have never cared for in my entire life. Given, my life may not have been that long, spanning just eighteen years thus far, but that makes it all the more depressing. That I uttered an "I do" at such a young age, to someone I didn't want to say it back... to avoid the reality that we would be married.

My parents at least honored my wishes of having a small wedding, their only condition being that the "small" group constitute only pureblood relatives and some friends, pureblood as well, of course. His parents were accommodating of this request, too... no surprise there.

The only downside was that the wedding was much grander, more extravagant than I'd have liked it, but that was no shock to me. A marriage between a Malfoy and a Vitelli was certainly going to be one of the most expensive weddings of the century, if not more. I couldn't deny that it was a pretty wedding, no expense was spared. However, that didn't mean that I had any say in it. I could have handled everything being picked out for me if I could have at least chosen my own groom.

I remember my mother and Narcissa making all the arrangements the minute this engagement was announced.

Just a month ago, I was sitting down, desperately trying to avoid the gaze of my then-just-schoolmate Draco Malfoy in his drawing room. I sat at the chair by the largest window and pretended to read the Daily Prophet while I wished that I would be anywhere but here.

An excited looking Lucius Malfoy barged in, with a rare smile donning his arrogant lips. My father followed him shortly after and stood next to him with a glint of mischief in his eyes. It was a look in him that I'd never seen before, but I knew something was up his sleeve, as always.

He took my hand and led me over to the couch where Draco was sat, many feet away. Lucius took the opportunity to then stand by my father and begin the formalities.

"As you both know, our families have known and trusted each other for quite some time," Lucius began. I didn't know where to look; at Draco would be bad enough, but his father with the way this conversation was going, would be worse. I settled for my father who was focused on his blonde associate.

"There isn't a better companion for a Vitelli to have than a Malfoy," my father interjected, looking directly at me. His thick Italian accent had always comforted me, but the words he spoke now sent a chill down my spine. I wanted nothing to do with these people.

"Nor for a Malfoy to have than a Vitelli," Lucius agreed, staring down his son.

"Which is why we've come to an agreement, to ensure the... longevity of both our houses," my father continued. The smile on his lips turned somewhat mischievous. "As well as the prosperity regarding finances and other assets you children shouldn't worry yourselves with."

"What kind of agreement?" I interrupted the men who clearly desired to be left in peace to speak freely. My father gave me something of a warning glare.

Lucius looked from his son to me, then from me, back to Draco.

"A marriage between the Vitelli and Malfoy family to bond our dynasties as one."

I glared at my father. I knew he could be conniving and arrogant, but to offer up his own daughter like bait as some... political advantage?

I stood up from the couch and flew into an anger that abrupted all at once. "Marriage?! Father, you're marrying me off? And to Malfoy, nonetheless!"

"Watch your tone, y/n, you're very well aware that the Malfoy family has been nothing but good to us since we moved here, and well before that through family relations. Now, I suggest that you apologize to your father-in-law at once for disgracing his name."

"Father-in-law?" I retorted, staring at Lucius. "Mr. Malfoy, I mean no disrespect to neither you nor your son, but I simply cannot take part in this marriage. Despite it being an agreement between the both of you, I refuse to have my own choice in marriage be taken from me!" I tried to keep as much a level head as possible, but my anger so obviously slipped out.

Lucius rolled his eyes. "I'll consider that an apology. Anyhow, Miss Vitelli, I'm sorry but you have no choice in the matter. This was decided upon years ago; we only found it applicable to announce now." His eyes shifted to Draco, who must have stood up at some point during my rant. "Son, you surely don't have any objection to this?"

Draco rolled his eyes. "It's not like I had a choice," he sarcastically responded.

"You knew about this?" I asked him.

"Merlin, no," he scoffed and placed his hands on his hips. "Not to you, anyway. I knew I'd be married off to some pureblood broad at some point, but I had no idea it would be you. Trust me, if I did, I would have put in a request for someone else," he sneered, giving me a wicked glare.

"Son, it was my understanding that—" Lucius began, but I cut him off, not wanting to hear his incessant babbling.

"So you're just going to accept this like it's no big deal? Like your freedom isn't being taken from you as much as it is mine?" I inquired to Draco, who still seemed unbothered as he had when he was sat on the couch reading his book.

"I suppose. There's not much I can do about it, Vitelli. Not much either of us can do about it."

I rolled my eyes. If there was one time for the Slytherin Prince to cause a commotion, it would be now. "You're utterly hopeless. If you had an ounce of the confidence that you portray at school then we could figure a way out of this mess!"

I noticed an anger swelling in Draco's gray eyes that were reflected in the scowl that played on his lips. Probably from my insulting his character, but that was the point— to get some emotion out of him and want to hate this as much as I do.

"Y/n, that is very much enough! Now, apologize to your fiancé here for your unprovoked offenses and then make your way into the kitchen to meet with your mother and future mother-in-law," my father insisted.

"Whatever for? And there's nothing to apologize for, not to this one at least," I motioned to Draco. "If anything, I deserve an apology for this entire situation!"

My father scoffed. "I understand you think you're not ready, y/n, but that is of no consequence to the reality of this. We can discuss this further at home, without offending your in-laws, but for now, you're excused to meet with the ladies of the house to discuss wedding arrangements."

Of course, that's what I needed to go for. I knew the men wouldn't be caught dead entertaining wedding plans— not that I was agreeing to do this, but simply being practical about the situation. It was tradition that the women from both sides of the family make the wedding arrangements, while the men typically worked out family business plans to take place after the nuptials.

I decided that the best possible card I could play would be the unhappy daughter one. I'd tried upset, laced with furious, accusatory, insulting... I may as well try to be the sad little girl that once appealed to my father.

"Papa," I cooed, using the Italian name for him I used to call him as a child, "I just don't love this boy. I can't marry someone I don't love." I made my best efforts of looking truly miserable, which I was, but in a more emotional, pathetic way that might tug at his heartstrings. I forced some glossy eyes and pouted my lips like a child being denied a toy.

I'd always used to use this when I wanted something as a little girl and it worked then, but a part of me knew that it was hopeless, after seeing how dedicated they both were to this matter.

"Darling, I know you don't love this boy," my father appealed, but much more sweetly than he had been before. That was a start. "There's nothing I want more than your happiness, but this isn't personal. It's business." That was a horrid conclusion, Father.

"Even if I don't love him?"

"You'll learn to love him."

With that, I nearly started crying... nearly. I didn't let myself break down in front of them, they didn't deserve the satisfaction. Especially not Draco, who I could see snickering next to me. After some more arguing with the men (to no avail, clearly) I reluctantly made my way to meet with my mother and Narcissa. I had no problem with her, she was always rather kind to me, especially as a child. She even gave me an apology for this marriage arrangement. Allegedly, she didn't want this to happen either but she had no control over what Lucius and my father decided upon.

I found comfort knowing that she felt similarly toward this as I did. My mother, too, but I wished she would have put up more of a fight for her own daughter's choice to marry. Her pity meant little to me, as she should have regarded my feelings enough to say something to my father or Lucius. Narcissa was different; she had no reason to offer up her condolences for anyone but her own son. I found that respectable.

My efforts to thwart this marriage were for naught, clearly.

Today, just a month after that cursed engagement (for lack of a better term) was announced, I had become a Malfoy. Legally, anyway. I insisted that for my final year of Hogwarts I still go by the name Vitelli; I couldn't bare to finish school with his name on all my assignments.

Our parents were hesitant about us returning for our final year of school at all. However, the one thing Draco and I could agree on, was that we both wanted to finish properly. Our parents saw it a little unnecessary, figuring that we could hire private tutors and finish our education at home, but we both pressed on that we wanted to finish traditionally, and with our own friends at school.

I also refused their offer for us to share a dorm room; I much preferred to spend my last year with my own friends in my own room. It felt a bit silly, truly, to be married and not stay in the same room as my husband, but if this was my last bit of freedom (if it could even be called that), I would cling to it as much as possible.

Anything to retain my last piece of individuality.

Chapter Text

The train ride to Hogwarts was excruciating.

Typically, I loved the train ride. It always filled me with excitement knowing that soon I would be at school, away from my family affairs and with my friends, having fun as a child should.

This train ride was different. It felt odd, knowing that I would be going to school, acting like a normal teenager, but actually being a married girl —barely a woman— desperately trying to run from the reality of what's happened this past summer.

Daphne and I snatched a train compartment for ourselves; everyone by now should know that we don't like to share. In past years, we'd always refuse anyone who tried to stay in our area for too long or for more than just a chat. This was our opportunity to catch up on things that happened over the summer. Much to my dismay, that was the last thing I wanted today.

Daphne was ranting on about her summer travels. Her parents took her all over Europe and met some nice French wizard boy during their two weeks in Paris; they're allegedly still in contact. Lucky girl. She got to pick who she wanted. And he sounded so handsome, too... tall, honey brown hair, blue eyes, built figure. Just my type, unfortunately.

While she was continuing on, I heard a pounding at the door. I looked through the glass and saw the platinum hair of Malfoy through the windows. I scoffed as he slid the door open and stepped inside.

"I didn't say you could come in," I avoided eye contact with him.

He rolled his eyes. "May we chat?"

"No," I refused promptly. Daphne looked at me confusedly, then back to Draco. He gave her a pleading look which she understood meant he wanted some privacy.

She comprehended his silent request and excused herself from the compartment, leaving Draco to sit across from me. I did my best to ignore his gaze and stare out the window instead, focusing on the things we passed by. The river, that autumn-touched tree, the cloud that looks like—

"Are you even listening?" Draco's snotty voice interrupted my gazing. He must have been going on about something; I did my best and somehow succeeded in tuning out his whiny voice.

"I suppose not," I finally looked at him. "Repeat yourself if it's so important."

He scoffed. I was beginning to hate that annoying jeer of his. He reached into the pocket of his slim, black suit and pulled out the gold wedding ring that my parents forced me to offer him on the day of our wedding. He passed it through his slender, pale fingers and it made me want to vomit at the sight of it. He fidgeted with it until he held it up between his long index and middle fingers for me to gawk at.

"As I was asking," he toyed, "what are we meant to do about these?"

I noticed him peer down at my left hand, scanning for either the engagement ring or wedding band, neither of which I chose to don.

"I suggest you keep yours tucked away unless you want any questions," I snickered to myself.

"You won't wear yours?"

I shook my head. "Of course not. I don't need people asking, more importantly I don't need the constant reminder that we're legally wed."

"Are you suggesting that we don't tell anyone about our marriage?" he inquired. For a flash, I thought I might see some... something, cross his eyes. I couldn't figure what it was, but it was probably some sort of annoyance.

"Precisely. Now if you don't mind, I'd like to be alone."

"Yes, actually, I do mind, wife," he strung out that last, contempt-filled word.

"Hush! Not so loud, Malfoy! Unless you really do want this whole train to know," I shuddered at the thought of this.

He let out a dry laugh. "You shouldn't call me 'Malfoy' anymore, unless you want to be reminded that it's your name now, too. Start with Draco."

"Don't tell me what to do," I retorted. "However, in this very rare instance, you may be correct. I'd rather call you by your first name than Mal— you know what I mean."

"Very funny," he rolled his eyes. "So where's yours?" he asked, looking back down at my hand again.

I crossed my arms, moving my hand out of sight as it tucked into my arm. "A jewelry box with my things. I don't plan on ever wearing it out, so you're aware."

He sunk into his seat. He tucked his own ring back into the pocket of his suit. The less I had to see it, the happier I was.

"Well, unfortunately Blaise and Theo already know about our little... rendezvous," he smirked.

"Do not call it that," I insisted. "It certainly wasn't a rendezvous by choice, mind you. Anyhow, I figured you'd have told them already. I plan on telling Daphne the same, but that will be it." I stared him seriously in his cold eyes, wanting to emphasize the importance of my words. "No one is to know about this."

He seemed to ignore my request. Order, more like. "Why shouldn't they? They'll know after school is over, anyway," he shrugged.

Draco became noticeably more deadpanned as the conversation went on. At that point, he seemed almost like he didn't care, that he had so quickly accepted what is and was comfortable with that knowledge. "Comfortable" may be an overestimation, but at least understanding without malign.

"I don't care if they find out then, Draco. But as for right now, I don't want to be associated with you, much less married to you. As it stands, if you have any shred of decency left of you—"

"That's a stretch," he interrupted with a snicker.

"Fine," I huffed. "If you have any desire to keep your... wife... happy, then I ask you to simply leave me alone this schoolyear to be in peace." To refer to myself as his "wife" was a daunting task in itself, but he clearly had no trouble using that word to his own advantage a moment ago. I might as well mirror his usage of it for the time being.

He looked out the window, finally breaking his gaze from me for what seemed like the first real time that entire conversation. "I suppose so."

I visibly relaxed. "Thank you... I appreciate it. Now, if you—"

Before I could finish, Draco had suddenly stood up and stormed out of the compartment, with a vigor so adamant that it felt like I could feel the seat tremble, and not from the movement of the train.

Daphne, who stood outside the compartment, took this as her cue to return, sitting in the seat across from mine where my blonde spouse had been but a moment ago.

"What's his deal?" she asked, letting out a breathy laugh to ease the mood.

I figured now might as well be a good time as any to break the news to her. It was a shame she couldn't be my maid of honor, and for that I even felt the need to apologize. The whole wedding was just thrown together so quickly and under such unfortunate circumstances, I didn't want any of my friends involved. I settled on asking my cousin who is two years my senior to bear witness to the wedding. She was the victim of an arranged marriage, too.

"Draco was just asking about..." I shook my head, "what we're going to tell people."

She cocked her head. "About what? Since when do you and Draco have anything to tell?"

I sighed. "I'm glad it hasn't been exposed to the papers yet, or among too many pureblood families. Daph, I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier, there was just too much going on..."

"Y/n, you can tell me anything. And I'll always forgive you. Go on, out with it."

I took a deep breath in and looked her straight in the eye. "Draco and I are married."

It took a second for it to process in her mind, but once it clicked, I noticed her eyes widen and jaw drop, as the beginning of a gasp started to form. I slapped my hand across her mouth to prevent that from happening; I didn't need more attention drawn to myself after Draco just stormed out of here.

"I know, I know!" I chided. "Look, it was just a mess... our parents arranged a marriage when we were children and it just came to fruition all of a sudden this past month."

Unsurprisingly, Daphne had many questions about this entire situation. I tried to answer them to the best of my ability, and as quietly as I could. Much to her chagrin (and mine, too), I really didn't have as many answers as I would have liked.

For starters, I didn't know why our parents arranged this marriage. Sure, some sort of agreement, or business deal, there was no doubt about it. But still, I was never told the exact reason. Additionally, I never had any notice of this! Unless one counts the instance in the drawing room where my father and Lucius sprung it on us, everything was a total shock. For two men who allegedly planned this years ago, it sure came out of nowhere.

"That's brutal..." she sat back in the chair, finally relaxing after everything settled in her mind. "You, being married to... Malfoy, of all people," she cringed. After a pause of a sigh, she continued, "You know, I think my younger sister has a thing for him."

"Really?" I almost laughed at that. "Hard to think that anyone could have 'a thing' for Draco. He's not exactly the dreamy, schoolgirl crush type."

"She must be delusional," Daphne agreed with me. "I remember a few times over the summer she'd ask my parents about him or his family. I'm sure she was dying to come over to their manor for a summer festival or something."

"I went to them all... trust me, she wasn't missing anything."

"She'll go ballistic to hear that he's married now," she laughed. I shot her a glare, a silent reminder of that I didn't want anyone to know. "I didn't mean now," she assured me. "I'm just saying, whenever you two make the announcement to other people, I'll love to see how upset she'll take the news."

"I don't exactly find pleasure in making your kid sister unhappy that her crush has been forcibly married to another girl," I explained. "If it were up to me, I'd much rather they had gotten married."

After some idle banter and then some more half-hearted explanations regarding the marriage, I tried to steer the conversation's direction clear of Draco. I had certainly exhausted that topic for the day.

Settling back into school life at Hogwarts was easy enough. Daphne and I shared a dorm, again, which was comforting. It almost made me feel normal, putting away my clothes and hanging up photos on the wall and on my dresser. I insisted that no photos of my wedding be brought to school with me; it'd be a pain to wake up to every morning.

And for the first time in nearly a month, I felt like a typical teen girl again. One who loves clothes as I stacked my closet full of my own personal outfits and school uniforms. One who studies hard and earns good grades as I placed my notebooks on my desk. One who shares secrets with her best friend as Daphne went on about her French lover from her summer trip.

We chatted well into the evening when our conversation started to plateau in terms of things to talk about. After an assessment of the clock, the Welcome Feast was set to start soon.

As much as it annoyed me having to sit through the first years' houses being chosen, we always loved the Welcome Feast. It was a renewing feeling of a fresh term and pure schoolyear.

Daphne and I took our seats at the end of the long Slytherin table with a few of our friends. As students piled in, I took note of who took the initiative to greet me. I got a few "hello's" from most of the Slytherins, a few Gryffindors or Ravenclaws who I had befriended over the years, as well. I made the effort to respond back happily. As miserable as everything else was, I was still just a girl who loved seeing her friends all over again every year.

It wasn't until I met the icy eyes of my husband walking in that a chill ran down my spine.

Chapter Text

It seemed that although he had just walked in, his eyes met mine immediately.

Those were a pair that I was quickly growing tired of seeing.

By some stroke of luck, this contact was cut short by his friends. Cronies, actually may be a better term for it. Not that I would really know, but if he didn't choose to tell Crabbe and Goyle about his marriage then he really must not care much for their friendship. It's likely he just keeps them around to boost his ego. I wouldn't be surprised; an ego that big needs constant reassurance.

The two henchmen-like characters pulled him from our mutual gaze and sat him down near the middle of the Slytherin table a sizable distance away from my own group, which I was happy about. Daphne continued on, telling the other girls we were sat with about her summer lover. It was actually quite cute, I could tell she must have been crazy for him. A lovestruck look like that must mean that it was important to her.

After some girly talk which I half-heartedly participated in (since I already heard all about Frenchie earlier), I saw McGonagall usher in the newbies. The little first years gawked around the room, like we all did when we were that doe-eyed age. A chatter of excited whispers came from the small children.

It bored me to a great extent having to sit through their house-sorting. I understood the importance of it, and I had always tried to make the lower years feel welcomed into our house. Slytherins tend to pride ourselves on a sense of fraternity, which I interpret as trying to help my own housemates. However, that doesn't make the sorting any less boring.

Name after name was called. A Gryffindor here, a Ravenclaw there, the all-too-happy Hufflepuffs cheered. I only bothered to look up from the table when a Slytherin was called, just to make a mental note of their appearance.

Especially since I was a Slytherin prefect this year (like last year, and the year before), I'd probably get stuck having to show the first years their rooms and organize some tours around just so the little ones know where to go and don't get lost. If we lost house points because a child couldn't find a class, it'd be wildly embarrassing.

When the old Sorting Hat finally finished its assessment (which took much too long— it must be seeking some attention these days after being shoved away all summer), Dumbledore finally allowed for us to eat.

If there was one upside to attending Hogwarts, it would be the food. Thank Merlin we had so many elves to prepare meals for us.

I scarfed down my dinner until I felt satiated. I was done a bit early, with a tinge of a stomachache probably from how quickly I just inhaled all my food. I held my hand to my abdomen as if that would somehow aid in the digestion process.

"Feeling alright?" I heard a voice from behind me inquire.

I craned my neck to look behind me and saw the figure of Cedric Diggory with a look of concern casted in his eyes. At this, I turned around fully so I was facing him. I mentally groaned but tried to keep my outward composure as neutral as possible.

"Yes, thank you," I quickly dismissed the topic, dropping my hand from my stomach. Merlin, I've made a fool of myself on the first night back. And to him, of all people.

"Right," he mused, a smile tugging on his lips. The smile he gave me didn't match his eyes, however. It looked more like he was battling some inner turmoil... and I had an inkling as to why. "I was wondering if you'd mind showing the first year Slytherin girls to their dorms? I've asked Malfoy to do the same for the boys."

"Malfoy?" I echoed. Of course, his father must have bought him the prefect position if I was given the title, as well.

"Is that a problem?"

I shook my head and sighed. "No, sorry about that. Of course I will, Ced. "

He seemed to light up the tiniest bit at the familiar moniker I used to refer to him as all the time. I haven't called him that name in a month, now. I took note of his reaction immediately and chose to change the subject.

"I take it you've made Head Boy, then?" I assumed, trying to change the subject to anything non-personal.

That hope that appeared in his eyes subsided all too quickly. Instead, he tried to mask it by feigning some sort of pride. It didn't suit his personality... he was too genuine for that arrogance he faked. He puffed his chest in a manner of peacocking and showed off the head boy badge that clung to his Hufflepuff robes that I once loved so much.

"Dumbledore told me right before the Feast," he simulated the face of someone who actually held the haughtiness of what he was trying to play up. He undoubtedly deserved the title, but whatever this act of pompousness was he was trying to achieve just didn't fit his demeanor. He's too good for this.

I wouldn't let him know that, of course. If anything, I just wanted this conversation to end.

"The workload won't be a problem, though. I know it's such an important role, to be Head Boy... what with the organizing prefects, acting as spokesperson for the students to the teachers, putting together extracurric—"

"You can handle it, I'm sure," I cut him off quickly. Merlin, Cedric was really trying to boast this position. How unlike him.

He definitely noticed my sudden annoyance at his bragging and seemed to drop it. "I'll see you soon then... for giving you your prefect schedule, of course."

I somehow doubted that was what he meant.

I gave him a curt nod in response and turned back to my friends without paying it a second thought. I didn't even bid the boy a goodbye... that was probably a tad rude on my end, but in all honesty, he was just hurting himself the more he carried on that conversation. I was doing the poor boy a favor.

"Trouble in paradise, y/n?" Tracey asked me.

"What makes you say that?" I coughed, trying to throw her off my scent. I was terrible at it, though, especially with these girls who knew me all too well.

"That's hardly any way to talk to your boyfriend," Millicent let out a devilish laugh. "Don't tell me you've dumped the guy... or worse, he's dumped you!"

"From the way that conversation went, you two might as well have been strangers," Tracey added.

Poor Daphne bit her lip, clearly trying not to egg the girls on. She knew full well that I wanted no part in telling more people about the situation I've been in.

"I'm sure y/n has her reasons," Daphne defended me. I gave her a weak smile in return for her kind response.

Unfortunately, Tracey was having none of it. "Yeah, right. Y/n's only been in love with Cedric for... how long were you two together? Two years? She would never talk to him like that unless something happened."

I stayed quiet, and tried to zone out and just disassociate myself from the conversation. As everything turned a bit hazy, I could still make out the voices of Tracey and Millicent pestering me about what had happened between Cedric and I.

After some amount of time, doing my best to ignore their chatter, I couldn't take it anymore. Against my better judgment, I let out a, "Fine! Yes, we broke up! Happy?"

Merlin, I probably said that too loud. I could feel the stares of a few students nearby me who definitely were within ear-range. "Over the summer," I tried to remedy myself by talking at a lower volume.

My friends exchanged looks of remorse between themselves. "Sorry to hear that, y/n..." Tracey mused. "Whatever for?"

This, I was definitely not letting onto. They may be my friends to some extent, but at this point, they just have no business knowing that I had to break up with Cedric to get married to someone I can't stand.

"We just did. I broke up with him, okay? Now, let's drop the subject before I get sick." I once again clutched my stomach like I had not too long ago, once again feeling churns of my indigestion. This time... probably wasn't from the food, though.

I could tell that Millicent and Tracey were uncomfortable with how I just spoke to them. They both choked out an apology or two under their breaths and continued eating, to avoid the situation. There's no doubt that they, and likely some other students nearby, would be talking about this.

I quickly glanced over at Cedric at the Hufflepuff table, hoping that he didn't hear that. Just my luck, of course he had. He was staring back at me with a sorrowful expression, his eyebrows knitted together in distress and his eyes glossy with what looked like to be the beginning of tears welling up. His lips were parted in a slight look of disbelief. Poor Cedric clearly wasn't over this, and I had just made it all the worse for him by making a big deal of telling everyone that we split.

Merlin, I'm an idiot.

Not just for doing this and embarrassing him, but breaking his heart at all. I didn't have the courage to tell him the real reason behind our sudden breakup, which meant that he was left thinking he did something worthy of being dumped. That was so far from the truth... he was an excellent boyfriend, a perfect one at that.

I hated admitting that I missed him.

The only consolation I had to offer him was that I wouldn't be seen with any other boys. How could I? It's not like I had my pick of the bunch anymore. Unfortunately, I simply couldn't tell him why that is. If it were up to me, I would have left this Feast early to sneak up to his room and make up for lost time with him.

I forced myself to look away from him before I got overly emotional as well. I certainly had my fair share of nights crying; I was nothing but a complete wreck over our breakup after I told him we were finished. Obviously, I wasn't fully over him yet, either... if at all.

A pang of guilt overcame me with how I spoke to him when he came over, cordial and polite, simply to ask me to perform my prefect duties. Sure, he was showboating and trying to make himself seem important, likely to show me what I'm missing, but he had no idea I already knew what I was missing. Trust me, I was missing it... and it wasn't his Head Boy status.

I made a mental note to try and be more polite around the Hufflepuff; it wasn't his fault by any means what happened and considering I still have some unresolved feelings for him, I owe it to him to at least offer him basic decency, as both a prefect under his orders and a human being in general.

I prepared myself a little speech of what I'd say to the first year girls when it was time to show them to their dorms. The typical orientation talk: here's your rooms, the password to our house, don't be late to classes, the prefects are here if you need any help... et cetera, et cetera.

I don't exactly love being a prefect at the best of times, but this was an especially bad time. Being forced to escort the lower years back to the dungeons with Draco leading the boys was borderline torturous. I put on my "prefect face", as one might refer to it, acting much nicer and helpful than I am in actuality. I couldn't scare these first years just yet; they're terrified enough as it is, having Snape as Head of House.

I showed the girls their dorm rooms and sorted out a few first day problems some of them were having. It was always the same; someone was missing a bag, some couldn't find the restrooms. Idle issues I solved in a matter of minutes. The girls were nice enough, so far... no doubt that would change with age.

Draco had been a bit less patient than I had, for whatever reason. I heard him shouting out aggressive directions from the boys' section all the way from the girls'. I made a mental note of reminding him to treat the kids with a little bit of kindness while they adjust.

After ensuring the girls had all their things ready, almost all of them went to bed immediately; the others just loitered in their rooms finishing putting away their things. This was a relief for me, seeing as I didn't want too much work the first night back.

I sat up in the common room, reading some trashy magazine that I picked up at the train station. A few pages in, I felt the couch I was sitting on sink with the weight of someone else at the other end.

I looked up from my magazine and saw Blaise Zabini. He shot me a lazy smirk in typical Blaise fashion.

"Evening, Zabini," I acknowledged his presence, giving him something of a warm smile. Blaise and I weren't exactly the closest of friends, but there was worse company to keep. He could crack a good joke here and there. However, I much preferred having Theo around; he and I were actually good friends.

"Hello, Vitelli," he replied, a dangerously handsome leer playing on his lips. "Or, shall I say... Malfoy?"

I could feel my eyes practically pop out of their sockets at that greeting. I frantically looked around the room, and to my relief, we were the only ones in the common room at this late hour.

"Blaise! Please, never say that again!" I chided him. "I do not need anyone here finding out about that!"

He let out an amused laugh; it made his head tilt back and he looked more than content with himself. "Relax, y/n, I'm just teasing. Don't worry, your husband already gave me the spiel."

I lightly slapped his arm with my magazine. "I mean it, Blaise! You better not go around telling anyone that... Draco swore that he'd only tell you and Theo. If I find out that somehow more than just the two of you know, you'll regret it."

He looked at me with that same, cocky grin donning his pink lips. His eyes were dark with mischief, like they usually were. "Take that up with your husband, not me, darling."

I rolled my eyes. Clearly, the threats weren't working. "Trust me, I have. I think he'll keep it quiet, but there's just no telling with someone like that." I crossed my arms and sunk back into the couch, a headache starting to spread over my forehead.

"Don't worry, y/n, I don't think Draco is exactly jumping at the opportunity to let every girl in this school fawning over him know that he's off the market."

I looked over at him with annoyance. "For all I care, he's very much on the market."

His eyebrows knitted together in confusion. "What's that supposed to mean?"

I sighed. "Blaise, I have absolutely no attachment to Draco, apart from the obvious. He can go with any girl he wants, for all I care... which is very little."

He cocked his head, again displaying his clear confusion with the situation. "You're saying you don't worry in the slightest about any possible... infidelity?"

I chuckled at his phrasing of "infidelity". I suppose that's exactly what it would be. The ends of my lips formed a smirk, like the one he had just moments ago.

"Worrying would imply care, which as I've made clear, I have none. I can guarantee you, he feels the same."

Blaise paused. He looked down and tugged on his Slytherin house ring on his left index finger, sliding it off and then back on again his ring finger. "You think so?"

I waited until he looked back up at me to entertain a response. His facial expression remained the same.

"I'm positive."

Chapter Text

The first week at Hogwarts wasn't anything out of the ordinary. Teachers are usually more lenient regarding tardiness and homework assignments toward the beginning of the year, so things were relatively calm.

My only problem was the pesky first years constantly coming up to my room to ask questions, especially ones that I've answered time and time again. Luckily, they seemed to have gotten the hang of things after being at Hogwarts for a whole week so I'd been left alone a bit more. Could finally get some decent sleep.

On the other hand, this meant my prefect duties at night would be starting.

For the first week, just the Head Boy and Head Girl are tasked with patrolling around at night, until they organize a schedule and job it out to the rest of the group. I hoped that tensions with Cedric would mean he'd assign me less work, wanting to see me less than the other prefects, but I knew I couldn't get out of my assigned work just because we had a falling out.

This resulted in myself, as well as the other prefects sitting in the library as Cedric and Hermione Granger (obviously who'd been named Head Girl, no surprise) going over the schedule with us. Well, all of the prefects except one person.

Cedric and Granger sat at the head of the short, but rectangular table with some parchment at their fingertips; no doubt Granger whipped that up for efficiency's sake.

Ron Weasley sat to Granger's left, next to me on one side of the table. Both of our partners were elsewhere. At least his was still at the table, but mine was... wherever a Malfoy might be found. I didn't waste my time trying to figure out what his degenerate self could be up to.

Across from Weasley and I sat Padma Patil and Terry Boot, the Ravenclaw prefects, and at the other end of the table was Hannah Abbott, Cedric's Hufflepuff partner.

"—while Padma and Terry will take Tuesday and Thursday, Ron and Hannah have Monday and Wednesday, which leaves Friday for Hermione and I to rotate," I heard Cedric babble on, while I zoned out from the chat. I was too embarrassed about Draco not being here.

I only caught most of what he said, but of course that meant that Draco and I had the weekend shifts. No doubt that was calculated so Draco couldn't stir up trouble by throwing parties in the common room. He was infamous for wild Slytherin-only parties that would get busted by teachers over and over again. He always kept having them, though. I'd admit, his tactics of keeping them under wraps had improved over the years, as well.

"Any objections to the schedule?" Granger inquired.

I deadpanned and then raised my hand mockingly, as if she were some teacher I couldn't be bothered to listen to. I didn't like listening to Granger babble on in classes, let alone outside.

The ends of Cedric's lips turned up in something of a smile. More of a smirk, but one of humor or amusement. "Y/n, you don't need to raise your hand," he told me.

I crossed my arms over my chest. "How am I supposed to trust that Malfoy will stay on this schedule if he can't be bothered to show up to prefect meetings? Saturday is the worst day to patrol, especially. I can't handle that myself; it's too much ground to cover."

Granger nodded, understandingly. "In the event that happens, we can assign you a temporary, stand-in partner. That goes for all of you, we can make adjustments if need be."

"Such little faith in me already, Vitelli?"

I turned my head to see where the owner of the voice was that called my name. I should've been able to tell by the malice in his voice, but I didn't know who it was until my gaze landed on my white-haired spouse sauntering over and sitting at empty spot next to Abbott. He removed his bag from around his shoulders and dropped it on the table obnoxiously, causing a loud thump.

He sat with one ankle over his knee, legs spread far apart. He had an irritating smirk playing on his lips.

"Why yes, actually," I glared at him. "The meeting started fifteen minutes ago. Of course you're late."

His eyebrows bounced up, like he was surprised. This was then replaced by a look of satisfaction with himself in a playful way. "You all waited for me? How kind."

I could tell that Cedric was having none of that. "Could you move your bag, Malfoy? You should see the schedule."

"And put it where?... the floor? Have you seen how dusty this library is? Really, Diggory, even you could have some standards—"

Since I was sat closest to him, I just picked his bag off the table and plopped it on the floor, earning a look of disgust from him as he reached down to grab it.

Before he could open his mouth to complain, Cedric slid over the large parchment for him to see, which shut him up quickly since he had something else to occupy his mind. He even left his bag on the floor... such a short attention span.

Cedric gave me a silently mouthed "thank you" which I returned with a warm smile. Cedric's expression, which was annoyed with Draco a second ago suddenly changed into a small grin, kept to himself. For a moment, I thought I saw a tinge of red tint his cheeks but our mutual gaze was cut short by Draco's whiny voice.

"Weekends? Diggory, I can't patrol weekends. It's the only free time I have off," Draco complained.

"You and everybody else, Malfoy," Cedric shook his head. "This is just for this month, we'll rotate eventually so everyone will have each night at some point."

Draco visibly relaxed. "Good. I didn't want this position to start with, and now I have to give up my spare time to look out for first years wandering around? Unbelievable."

"Is there something else you'd rather be doing?" Granger spoke up.

I knew Granger wasn't one for parties, and I can't say that I necessarily was, either. But she had some strict vendetta against them. She was obviously prying for something to give himself up. Maybe we could get him stripped of his title if he admitted to something, but that was a long shot, considering how many times he's been cited for other things.

Draco snorted. "Of course, mudblood. Anything."

We all turned to look at him with our own expressions of shock, but none quite like Cedric.

"Malfoy that is enough!" Cedric raised his voice, clearly angered by Draco's lack of respect for Granger. I didn't like her much, either, but he was a prick for stooping so low as to call her by that slur. "Keep up this attitude and you won't be a prefect for much longer!"

Draco's eyes widened with what looked like hope. "You promise?"

I shook my head and looked over at him, clearly upset with his treatment of our head prefects. I glared at him intensely while I chided his actions. "Merlin, Draco, control yourself! Have some respect for their roles!"

"Me? Control myself? While we're on the topic of respect, y/n, you could certainly have a lot more respect for me as—"

Before he could finish, I grabbed his wrist resting on his leg and pulled him over closer to me with a force that I didn't know I had. Luckily there was nothing to bang his head on, or he might've gotten whiplash from how hard I pulled. This resulted in, to my favor, him gasping rather than finishing that sentence.

"If you know what's good for you, you won't even think of bringing that up. Ever again."

Our heads were less than a foot away from each other, a few inches away was a better assessment. I could almost sense something in his wide eyes that I hadn't noticed before... something that probably wasn't even ever there before. It looked something like fear, but not quite. More so like an anxiety or jittery nervousness. His eyebrows were scrunched together and caused wrinkles to form.

We sat like this for a few moments before I felt the warm hands of Cedric prying us apart. Even if it was just for a second, I reveled in his familiar touch and a blush crept its way up my neck as I turned away. I couldn't say if he felt it too... I looked away before I could analyze his face.

"You're coming with me, Malfoy. We're going straight to Dumbledore and I'm requesting a revocation of your prefect status," Cedric pulled Draco up by the collar to stand facing him.

Cedric was an inch or two taller, but Draco was excellent at feigning confidence. He stood tall, standing up straight and looking quite intimidating for someone who looked almost scared just a moment ago.

"For what? Using a silly little school insult? I doubt the Headmaster has any time to entertain this notion of yours, Diggory," Draco persuaded him, dismissively.

While the two bickered on, I looked over at Granger who now was in the arms of Weasley. He was patting her hair and whispering some things to her, probably sweet nothings to calm her down. I knew she was an intelligent and confident girl, but I can't imagine that being called that word would ever feel good, or even tolerable. We weren't friends necessarily, but it hurt to see her upset. Especially at the hands of Draco, nonetheless. He's not my responsibility in the slightest, but as a result of our new relationship, I felt some remorse by proxy.

The other prefects at the table kept to themselves, mostly. The two Ravenclaws just muttered amongst themselves while Abbott watched Cedric and Draco have at it.

I turned my attention back to the arguing boys.

Cedric, to his merit, was authoritative but still making logical arguments. It would've been easy for anyone else to fly into a rage and sink to Draco's level, trading insults. It was quite mature on his part to keep a level head.

"You've continually disrupted the workflow of this group, Malfoy! This is nothing personal, but you're no team player and do not deserve the honor of a prefect if you act this way. You show up late, having no respect for the time that this group has set aside, then you make jokes and complain about your schedule, then viciously insult Hermione!"

"'Team player'? Diggory, you sound like such a summer camp leader. We're not away for arts and crafts and singing kumbaya around the fire, so don't think you have some authority over me."

"You will respect your superiors... both of us. That includes respecting your Head Girl."

"My superior?" Draco almost looked offended at this. "If you think that Granger is, in any way, my superior, you're sorely mistaken, Diggory."

A sly grin reappeared on his face as he got closer to Cedric, their faces just inches from each other. His eyes narrowed and he lowered his voice. "But you wouldn't understand any sort of hierarchy... being a dirty half-blood."

Cedric simply rolled his eyes at this comment. He had no reason to be insulted by any of Draco's petty offenses; he was truly a wonderful guy and was aware of his assets. Cedric was always the bigger person, and mature enough to let bygones be bygones.

However, I wouldn't tolerate his behavior.

I stood up and grabbed Draco by the arm, like Cedric had a moment ago. He looked down at my fingers around his forearm and groaned, trying to wriggle out of my grasp. "Hands off, blood traitor!"

"We are going to Dumbledore," I glared at him. I turned back to Cedric who stared down at me with a certain surprise in his eyes. "You can go back and continue the meeting... comfort Granger, whatever. I'll handle Malfoy."

"Y/n, that's really not necessary. I'm Head Boy—"

"Which means you have bigger responsibilities than ridiculing this nuisance here."

I let go of Draco for a moment and instead reached for Cedric's arm. Draco wiped his arm on his pants in a disgusted fashion, as if I had the plague.

The familiar feeling of his arm was soothing, and I could tell by how he visibly relaxed at my touch that he was calmed by the gesture, as well. He inhaled then exhaled deeply. I lowered my voice and looked at him with a gentler expression.

"I can handle it, Ced."

His gaze lingered for a moment before nodding in agreement. He leaned down close to my ear and whispered, "If he gives you any trouble, come to me." His fingertips brushed the hair by my neck out of the way and behind my shoulder.

The sensuality of his voice almost made me shiver. His touch, however, succeeded in that.

I silently agreed and once again grabbed Draco by the arm, pulling away from Cedric. Quickly, I escorted him out of the library as we made our way to Dumbledore's office. Well, more like I resorted to physically dragging him there. The whole walk over, he was mumbling out offenses and petty remarks.

He uttered out a slew of insults, some about prefect meetings being a "waste of time", that he had "better things to do", or the likes of him generally being too good to lower himself to this job. I did my best to ignore most of his comments.

"He's being so obvious, you know," Draco snorted, his mood changing a tad, to just annoyed rather than gloating.

"Obvious?" I looked at him.

"It was the most pathetic play for a girl I've seen in a long time, and I've seen a lot of desperate lads in my day."

"You don't know what you're talking about, Malfoy."

"Don't play dumb, y/n. It's so clear that he wants you."

I stopped in my tracks and dropped my hand from his arm, which I was using to heave him along. "What makes you say that, Draco? Genuinely, what?"

He let out a breathy chuckle. "Did you not see his act of heroics? That was obviously just to make you fall at his feet. Diggory: always the man of honor..."

"Unlike some people in that group, Cedric happens to be a naturally good person. He doesn't stoop to 'heroics' to appear like the good guy; he just is."

He snorted. "I knew how you two were. Even back then, I disapproved of it... for obvious reasons. Or have you already forgotten that you two were only the most annoyingly perfect couple at this school? Apart from the fact you filthened your blood status, associating with that."

"That was before... whatever happened between us. No... not between us, but to us. And don't call him such things! Of all people, he doesn't deserve the insults."

He flicked his tongue, cheekily. "Judging by his attitude toward you, I take it you haven't told him?"

I shook my head. "I'm not exactly flaunting it, although you'd certainly want to... and, for that, I have a bone to pick with you for almost exposing us to everyone!"

I desperately wanted to change the subject from Cedric and I; the less I had to talk about it or think about him, the sooner I'd have moved on. It just so happened that I had the excuse of Draco nearly outing our relationship to the group conveniently on hand.

I was angry with Draco for what he almost said anyway. I'd be too embarrassed to show my face in that prefect group again if they knew what we really were.

He shifted his weight from one leg to the other in what seemed like a nervous fashion.

"I didn't mean for that to happen," he looked down. He spoke softer than he had a minute ago, not quite out of remorse for disrespecting my request, but more like he was upset with himself for doing it. "It almost just... slipped."

"I don't care what you meant to happen. You promised me that you wouldn't say anything, and just a week into the school year you almost announce it to the entire library! Merlin, I'm lucky that I stopped you before you got carried away."

"I didn't even mention anything! For all they know, I could have been talking about being a prefect, in your house, my blood status, among the likes. Don't read too much into it, or it'll cause actual suspicion."

"Or you could just leave me in peace—"

"Why is it such a big deal?!" He suddenly became animated again, not quite yelling, but certainly driven by an emotional response. "If you didn't have a choice, there's nothing to be embarrassed about!"

"We've been over this! I just don't want anyone knowing. And quiet yourself before you let it slip again and anyone walking down this corridor hears!"

"Fine, y/n! Have it your way! While you're at it, go back to your own bloody dorm, I can go to the Headmaster myself," he threw his head back in annoyance.

"You're funny, Malfoy. The second I leave you, you'll just go to your friends. I want to see that you get what's coming your way."

He scoffed a little. I was growing to hate that amused expression that rested on his face.

"You think that when we go to Dumbledore he's going to do anything about it? Y/n, you're really stupider than you look. And stop calling me Malfoy! We've been over this."

Before I could open my mouth to rebut his insult (or his request), he continued on. "My father made a big donation to the school and I was given this position. He thought it'd... straighten me out, or something. I'm telling you, if we go in there, you'll be disappointed that I'll be let off the hook."

While Draco was indeed a liar, he was always honest about his father's influence on things... people, more so. In fact, when I first heard he got the position, I figured he scammed his way into it.

"That may be so, but I'm still reporting you for a clear lack of respect for your fellow prefects and especially Head Girl," I stood my ground, staring him dead in the eye.

He sighed. "Fine. Don't say I didn't warn you."

I led the way, him trailing slightly behind me. I kept my pace up, intentionally leaving him behind a little.

After a few moments of silence, he had the nerve to pipe up again.

"Since when are you and the mudblood Granger so well acquainted now?"

I didn't bother turning around. "We're not."

"Yet you still defended her."

"Because sometimes people don't deserve to be insulted. It's not so wrong to want to be a decent person from time to time. I'd suggest you try it, but I don't think you have the capabilities."

He snickered behind me, causing me to turn my head for a moment. That provided him an opportunity to catch up to me, taking longer strides so that he was now on my side.

"I'm more capable than you think, y/n."

"Not when you go around calling the Head Girl a mu— an offensive term."

"If I remember correctly, y/n, you've used that term a number of times before. Quite a few, actually."

Unfortunately, he was correct. But I was a child, when I didn't understand the full meaning of the word, or the worth of people, for that matter. I did in my first few years of school, and that's when Draco and I were somehow friends; we clung to the same group of entitled children who didn't know any better.

All of that changed in my fourth year when I had a crush on Cedric. I didn't care if he was a half-blood; I liked him for who he was, not what he was. Especially after we started dating in our fifth year... he turned me into a better person. Since then, I'd never called anyone by that name, even if some people in my circle continued to.

It especially bothered me when the Slytherin boys called Cedric a mudblood. They constantly harassed me for "mixing blood" with someone like him. They couldn't stand the notion of a pureblood and a half-blood together, especially a Hufflepuff. I could handle the remarks from my own house, but nothing irked me more than when the Slytherin boys, especially Draco and his cronies, went after Cedric.

"I don't anymore. Some of us have matured, Draco. You'd do well to do the same."

He scoffed. "I'm not whipped by some mudblood; I don't have to do anything."

"I'm not whipped!" I suddenly became animated again, causing him to flinch out of surprise for a fleeting moment, soon replaced by his achingly familiar leer.

He let out a snicker. "Right. That calm, neutral response holds no emotional ties."

"We are not having this conversation," I ordered dismissively, picking up my pace again.

Draco, falling behind my quick strides, grabbed my forearm, causing me to jerk back and face him. A little too close for comfort, I might add.

He looked down at me and placed his lips at the same spot Cedric had done just a few minutes ago, just hovering next to my ear. I could feel his deep breaths against my skin. His voice lowered to a sultry tone.

"We'll have to eventually. Sort out your feelings for that mudblood Diggory now before it's a problem."

Chapter Text

Across the potions classroom, I couldn't ignore Draco and Blaise laughing amongst themselves. It was an obnoxious type of laughter that could only equate to smugness or having gotten away with something, which was unfortunately exactly what happened.

Much to my chagrin, Malfoy was actually being truthful about what would happen when I took him to Dumbledore.

The Headmaster kindly thanked me for reporting Draco's insubordination, but stated that these were issues to be dealt with privately, in the group. He allegedly hadn't broken any real rules or violated any guidelines that prefects were required to follow. As such, Draco was let off with simply a warning and being told to do better.

It made me sick to my stomach that someone like Malfoy could get away with anything he wanted just because his father bought his position as prefect, especially since he didn't even want to be a prefect, seemingly. It was a recipe for disaster; he could flaunt his prefect power whenever he wanted without consequence. Considering he had no care for his job anyway, and everyone in the group was sick of his antics, I'd have to double my prefect efforts as his assigned partner.

I had voiced these concerns to Daphne, but she was sat with Tracey at another table. Theo took the liberty of keeping me company.

"Here," he plopped two Advanced Potions books down on the desk, sitting down at the empty chair on my left. "Picked this up for you."

"Thanks, Theo. Saved me the trouble," I grinned and picked the worse of the two; he could have the newer one.

I flipped through the pages quickly, feeling the slight breeze of the papers passing by on my fingers. The book itself was quite beaten up, but there was something comforting about its datedness.

"How do you feel about Slughorn this year? Seems like an alright bloke," he turned in his seat to face me.

I shrugged. "He's a family friend... supposedly knew my grandfather pretty well. I've met him at a few family functions. He's a bit of the airy, socialite type but nothing wrong with him."

Slughorn typically would come to ballroom events or large gatherings put on by my family when they first moved to the UK, but nothing overly personal. They had met Slughorn when he came to Italy many years ago, and my grandfather and him had a decent friendship whenever one was visiting the other's country. Since he passed away a few years ago, I haven't seen much of the professor except at large events.

We moved to the UK when I was just a child, so I don't remember or even know an extensive amount about him, but I didn't have anything necessarily poor to say about Slughorn.

Theo nodded. "Yeah, I'd say so. Thinking about the Slug Club at all? He's mentioned it a few times."

"It's by invitation, Theo," I let out a dry laugh.

"Even so, I have no doubt the both of us will get accepted," he gave me a playful grin.

"Right," I returned his sly smirk. "If I'm invited I think it would be disrespectful not to go, even if I don't particularly want to. If you're there it'll be a... little more tolerable, at least."

"Just a little?"

"Barely manageable."

He placed a hand over his heart in a mocking way of feigning pain which earned a genuine laugh from me.

"Ouch, that hurts, y/n," he joked back. "Careful with your words, they cut me deep."

"Glad to know you care for me so much that I make an impact," I sarcastically jested.

He snorted and looked down, chuckling to himself. "You're coming to Hogsmeade this Saturday, aren't you?"

I shook my head. "Unlikely I'll get a chance. We're barely a few weeks into the schoolyear and I'm already drowning in assignments."

"Glad I didn't sign up for that Advanced History of Magic class, like you. Advanced Potions is bad enough as it is... anyhow, you should definitely come along. I'm sure you can manage your work," he encouraged.

Theo and I had always been decent, if not, good friends actually. I quite enjoyed spending time with him privately, it was just in larger group settings that we didn't see eye-to-eye. His ego instantly inflated when he was around Blaise or Draco, especially.

He was still good company to keep in private settings, however. We had our fair share of rather fun experiences together. Unfortunately, most of my time had been wasted on making up for Draco's lack of participation in prefect things or my many classes I was taking this final year.

I hummed in response. "I'll definitely consider it. If not, then some other time for sure."

"I'll take you up on that. And if by some measure you can't slip away, I'll make sure to drop off something at your dorm room," he smiled.

After some more light banter, class finally started. When I said that Slughorn was airy, I definitely meant it. It seemed like most of class he would rather make conversation or chat about social topics than actually brew potions. Not that I was complaining, but it just meant more work to do independently when I'd rather learn it in class than outside.

Slughorn had just spent a few minutes at our table discussing intercountry magical social events, which I could tell he enjoyed all too much. Theo had jokingly mocked the professor behind his back when he wasn't looking, a few times. Soon enough, he made his way onto the next table, chatting up Draco and Blaise instead. Surely they'd have something to discuss.

"Are you going out for anything on the quidditch team?" Theo asked while pouring some ingredients into our shared cauldron.

"Definitely not," I chuckled, handing him the next part. "I can't fly a broom to save my life... they'd need Madam Pomfrey on standby if that happened. What about yourself?"

"Maybe, but I'm not so sure. I've done quidditch for three years now, I'm getting a bit tired of the sport, or at least being a chaser anyway. If I did, I'd want to be seeker."

Seeker. I'd gone to dozens of quidditch games, to watch Cedric play as seeker. I know it could be incredibly dangerous if not done properly, and Theo just didn't seem like he had the capabilities. Not that I would tell him that, but he had unknowingly struck a cord in my heart by mentioning that.

"I've heard it's a tough position, if you do," I advised, my mood suddenly becoming less sociable and more reserved at the thought of him playing against Cedric, who would likely play again for Hufflepuff. I refocused my attention back to the potion to distract myself.

"From Malfoy, you mean?" He looked up at me from the potion. "Didn't think you two were quite at the level of your relationship to... chat about those things," a small smirk formed on his lips. "Unless you're more advanced than I thought?"

I shook my head vigorously. "Merlin, no, Theo! Don't you remember Cedric is seeker, too?"

A hint of red crept up his neck in what seemed to be an embarrassed blush.

"You're right, sorry about that. I'd almost forgotten that you two were together for so long, what with things being so different now. You know, while we're on the topic, how are you... feeling about everything?" He asked, somewhat cautiously. His eyebrows furrowed and he leaned his forearms on the edge of the table, looking to be genuinely concerned.

"Since when have you taken such an interest in my personal life?" My gaze shot daggers, with my short patience being tested.

He was taken aback and held his hands up defensively. It made me suddenly regret lashing out at him when he was just being concerned for my wellbeing.

"Calm down, y/n, you act like we aren't friends. Friends are allowed to be curious about the other's life without some ulterior motive," he defended himself, but maintaining a calm voice.

I inhaled deeply, allowing myself to relax a bit. I needed to stop these sudden outbursts if I wanted to keep a level head, especially in class. I could save these theatrics for someone who earned them.

"You're right... sorry about that, Theo. You didn't deserve that. And since you're asking, it hasn't been that easy. I mean, I'm sure you could tell by my outburst here," I forced a dry laugh, trying to alleviate some tension. "I'll manage, but I haven't been comfortable getting used to the idea."

He nodded, seemingly in a sort of acceptance of my apology.

"I'm just saying, y/n, he may be my friend, but you are, too. It shouldn't stop you from confiding in me when you need to discuss something. If you need anything, you can come to me. Don't be shy, my door is always open for you."

I looked up at him with a warmer expression, appreciating his offer. After all, he was simply being a decent human and I had no reason to snap at him like that. I inched my way closer to him and wrapped my arms around his waist in a loose hug. "Thanks, Nott. You always know what to say."

Being quite a bit taller than me, he secured his arms around my shoulders and whispered a muffled "you're welcome" into my hair, seeing as his chin fell at the top of my head.

We stayed like this for but a fleeting moment, before I heard the voice of Professor Slughorn interrupting us, waltzing over from Draco and Blaise's table. He had his arms up in the air like there was some scandalous commotion.

"Miss Vitelli! Mr. Nott! Please, save your... interactions for outside of class," his jolly character made its way over to us. "For that, you'd better hope that your potion is finished, and in perfect working condition."

I obviously hugged him in a merely platonic way, but I understood how it could be interpreted, especially in the classroom. I doubt he would have reacted the same, had Slughorn knew the subject matter.

As Slughorn approached our potion for testing, Theo and I pulled away from each other, but I glanced at him through the corner of my peripheral and saw a playful smirk. To my surprise, I had the same expression.

He leaned down and whispered, "If he's like this now, imagine ol' Sluggy at one of his own parties."

———

That afternoon after classes, Theo and I had been basically inseparable. It felt really nice to be able to air out my frustrations to him about the marriage, and it was comforting talking about it with someone who I knew was trustworthy. Even if I wasn't the one who told him about it, I still was taking the opportunities given to me.

We'd spent most of the afternoon at the Black Lake, while the weather is still nice, but later in the evening it was dinner time and we were forced to leave. He escorted me to the Great Hall and, to my surprise, sat down next to me at the end of the table, away from our other housemates.

Slowly but surely, the rest of our respective groups piled in. No doubt they would interrupt our privacy, which I have to admit, I was quite liking just spending time with him.

Theo was whispering something humorous in my ear that made me burst out in deep laughter when my eyes landed on Daphne walking in. She gave me a look of surprise and sat across from me. "Evening, y/n," she greeted, somewhat hesitant about the new seating arrangement.

"Might need glasses, Greengrass. I'm here too," Theo joked. "I'm only kidding. Nice to see you."

"Right, you too, Nott," she mused. "You two seem awfully cozy today?"

I shook my head, letting out a chuckle. "Not quite, Daph. We've just been catching up. Haven't seen each other all summer, after all."

Something about her looked unconvinced, which means I knew I'd have to do some explaining later. Before she could say anything else, heavy stomping over to our seats interrupted our trio.

"Nott, where were you? I went by our dorm looking for you and you were nowhere to be found," the icy eyes of Draco were seething red at his friend.

Theo finished the bite of food he had in his mouth and cleared his throat. "Calm down, mate. What did you need me for?"

Draco rolled his eyes. "We were supposed to meet at the quidditch pitch, remember? Practice for the tryouts?"

Theo's eyes widened; clearly, he had forgotten. "Sorry about that, Draco. Can we do some other day? I was a bit... caught up."

"Caught up doing what?" Draco asked, sitting down next to Daphne.

"What are you doing?" Theo dismissively asked, motioning to Draco who was putting food on his plate.

"Am I not allowed to eat during meal times?"

"That's not what I me—" Theo cut himself off, scoffing. "Let's go somewhere else and discuss this, Draco."

"No. Here is just fine." Draco deadpanned, looking completely bored with Theo. He took a swig of pumpkin juice.

"Then I suggest you drop your attitude," Theo lowered his voice. "We're in the company of ladies, you know."

Draco exchanged a look from me to Daphne, then back to me again.

"Trust me, they won't cause any trouble."

I rolled my eyes in annoyance. At least, everyone in this group was aware of our arrangement; I didn't need to necessarily hide anything. It was simply irritating that he went out of his way to make me miserable just because he could.

Draco turned his attention back to Theo. "Now, what was more important than us practicing for quidditch? Which, mind you, you were the one who requested we practice today."

"I had more pressing matters to attend to," Theo replied, ambiguously.

The subtle mystery in his answer resulted in a small smile to take form on my face. Not only was he avoiding giving away that it was me who he spent his time with, likely to prevent Draco's behavior towards me worsening, but he considered me more important than his original plans. I took precedence over them.

It was nice knowing that he genuinely cared about me and wanted to make time to hear out my problems if I needed it. I haven't felt wanted like that, in a long time.

"Fine, be that way," Draco huffed. "No doubt you were sneaking out with some sixth year to satisfy your desires, anyway."

Theo scoffed. "You're the only one who still resorts to that, Draco."

This, however, piqued my interest.

I tried not being too obvious about my attention, but Theo had essentially confessed to Draco seeing other girls.

I looked up to see Draco's reaction. His eyes were focused on his plate in front of him, clearly avoiding what Theo had just said. I couldn't quite figure what emotions were eating him up. It certainly wasn't shame, but perhaps embarrassment. Some sort of discontent that Theo had said that.

I suddenly was forced to consider the possibility, and a likely one at that, Draco was probably unfaithful to me. I supposed that's a silly way to word it, as that would imply some sort of actual relationship or reciprocation of feelings.

Neither of which I had.

However, it made me ponder the possibilities of this arrangement. For all I care, which is virtually nothing, Draco can be with other girls. Take them on dates, woo them, engage in whichever activities they are drawn to, as innocent or sinful as they please.

That also meant I could be with other boys, potentially.

What sense was there in that I had to remain faithful to this arrangement, or have any respect for it, if he wouldn't do the same?

I hadn't considered this possibility until now, and I still wasn't quite sure I even wanted to indulge. Something still felt... morally wrong about it.

I'd always dreamed about being married to the man that I was completely in love with, and in doing so, of course remaining faithful to him because there'd be nobody else that I'd ever want besides him.

However, seeing as this wasn't the case for me, I realized that I'd probably feel little guilt, if any, about any extramarital relationships. Especially if he was doing the same, or worse.

Regardless, that didn't change the fact that I was still sitting at a table, across from my husband. Neither of us wearing our rings, or even having the slightest suggestion of dedication to this arrangement, but nonetheless, he was in fact, my spouse.

I decided I wouldn't indulge any other desires until I'd figured out how I want to deal with this marriage, if at all.

Many seconds, possibly even minutes had gone by, but finally, Draco piped up after staying silent for so long. I didn't think I'd live to see the day where Draco didn't have a witty response to quip back at someone immediately, but I'd finally seen what he's like after heavy consideration.

Even then, all he could muster up was a meek, "You don't know what you're talking about."

Chapter Text

Prefect duties were a blur, most nights.

I'd been asked to fill in, here and there, which were oddly enough the nights that I enjoyed the most. Patrolling around the castle with Granger, Abbott, or even Weasley were productive enough that I could be back in my dorm room at a reasonable hour. They all did their job, which I appreciated. Some light conversation, cordial and polite, but it was mostly just getting our necessary work done. I still hadn't been scheduled with Cedric, which I was relieved about.

Patrolling with my assigned partner, however, was torturous for a multitude of reasons.

Draco's mood always seemed to shift at the drop of a hat.

At some points in the night, he would remain completely silent, even ignoring the short conversations that I tried to make or things to discuss as per prefect duties. Other times, he'd be oddly talkative, albeit his typical arrogance or making crude jokes, but talking my ear off, nonetheless. I even snapped at him a few times after he annoyed me so much that I couldn't contain myself any longer.

Even regarding actual duties, he had a terrible attitude as if he couldn't be bothered to write up a slip for detention. He did, however, always make sure to scold the student or yell at them in some capacity, which meant I always had to step in and apologize to the younger year. I couldn't have them running off to bed terrified.

"You could be nicer to these kids, you know," I scoffed, watching one walk away after I'd assigned him a detention for staying out past curfew. "They're just children."

"And you could grow a spine," he rolled his eyes. "They know the rules. I have every right to discipline them as I see fit."

"No, you don't actually. You can't make the rules; just enforce them. And traumatizing eleven-year-olds isn't included in the job description."

"Must you always be so prissy? Live a little, y/n."

"Unlike some people, I actually have respect for this school and its rules, especially my position. I happen to like our prefect group, barring a certain member," I sneered.

He feigned hurt at that comment. "Ouch, getting a bit personal, aren't we?"

He smirked and tucked his hands into his pockets in a smug way as we continued on with our patrol.

"That's actually the opposite of what I'm getting," I rolled my eyes at his malicious comment.

"Oh, please," he scoffed, becoming annoyed again. "We all know the reason why you're so keen to be the perfect group member, anyway."

I turned to look at him, cocking my head as I tried to make sense of his remark. "And why is that?"

"To impress your beloved Diggory, of course," he leered.

At that, I stopped in my tracks and let out a burst of laughter. It was loud and obnoxious at first, enough to be heard from the other end of the corridor. As I saw his expression change from pompous to confused, almost offended that I'd laugh at his proposition, my laughter changed to a lower, more dry laugh that made him seethe. I clutched at my stomach as I suppressed the laugher rising up in my chest again.

Draco stood with his hands on his hips, weight shifted to one side and rolled his tongue on the inside of his cheek in an impatient fashion.

"Care to explain what's so funny?"

Once I regained my composure, I stood up straight to face him properly, still letting out a low chuckle as my breathing returned to normal. He ran a hand through his white hair that somehow slightly tousled itself during our walk.

"You... you think... I need this job to impress him?" I choked out between laughs.

"Why else would you take the position?"

I let out a cough, ending my spiel of hard laughter. My throat was suddenly dry from its cackling.

"If you had any idea of our relationship, past or present, you'd know that I don't need this job to get Ced's attention."

His grey eyes shot daggers at me, while the end of his lip snarled bitterly.

"Fine. Let's pretend that's not the reason you're so excited for every meeting. Then why do you bother with all this?"

"Malfoy, unlike you, some of us just care about the school and want to do well as students. Where's your Slytherin ambition?"

He looked offended once more, the end of his lip tugged up in that same, spiteful half-grin. "I have plenty of ambition, y/n. In ways you wouldn't understand."

I brushed off his poor banter and continued on with the patrolling, allowing him to catch up to me. His lean, long legs took prideful strides in a relaxed manner that caught up to me quickly, so that he was on my left side.

"If you're so confident, then enlighten me: what's anything you're ambitious about?"

The smirk that was on his face a moment ago grew larger. A sharp breath escaped him in something of a snort, amused with whatever he was thinking.

"I don't think that's suitable conversation for prefect patrolling," he teased in a low, suggestive tone. "That's more... after hours activities."

My eyebrows scrunched together in a disgusted way, having a faint idea of what he could be referring to. I had heard rumors around the castle about him being quite the womanizer (for whatever reason girls seemed to find him attractive), but he hadn't made any clear, suggestive remarks to me yet. I found it disgusting that he'd brag about his conquests.

"Merlin, Malfoy, I meant something important. Not your... erotic personal matters," I quickly dismissed his comment, making it clear that I didn't find it amusing in the slightest.

He chuckled. "You did ask, after all."

"It's not what I meant. If anything, you're proving my point more by failing to produce anything of value to mention. If I didn't know any better, it might sound like you're overcompensati—"

"Don't try to psychoanalyze me, Vitelli. What I get up to... what makes me tick is my own business, and I don't have to answer to you about anything."

I let out an exasperated groan which piqued his interest, having him turn to me with a look of surprise on his face.

"Can't you ever just be at peace? Stop being so difficult once in a while, especially for this. You always prolong everything to the point where we argue so much that we can't even finish patrols on time. Trust me, I dread these nights even more than you do," I ranted out.

Part of me was slightly disappointed in myself that I slipped out my aggression like that, but I knew he deserved it. That and then some.

He stayed silent for a few moments, as we walked in awkward peace for the first time all night. His chatting had resulted in him putting his foot in his mouth; I just had to call him out on it.

"I didn't say I dreaded these nights," he mumbled after some time.

"Yes, you have. You've repeatedly complained how much you hate this job—"

"This job, yes, I dread. The nights, not so much," he corrected matter-of-factly.

I furrowed my brows as I tried to analyze whatever he meant. It made no sense; these nights were his job, there was nothing else to look forward to. Unless, of course, he was referring to some of that personal "after hours" business that I refused to dwell on.

I chose not to reply to whatever he meant. Better to finish the job in silence, if I wanted to be back in my dorm room anytime soon tonight. If it was important, surely he'd repeat himself, or clarify.

He never did.

———

That Sunday was the first time I'd been out to Hogsmeade all term.

After enough persuasion, Theo had finally convinced me to accompany him on a weekend outing.

"You've been peskier than a first year finding his classes about this trip, you know," I jokingly bumped his arm as we made our way into the Three Broomsticks for a drink.

"But it was worth it, was it not? I've finally got you to leave that dorm and take a break from your studying," he returned a genuine smile, finding us a spot as we sat down.

"I suppose," I shrugged. "It's not like I haven't been here before. Only since third year," I chuckled.

"Fine," he huffed, before smirking playfully at me. "I'll just have to get you to come to more parties this year, then."

"Dream on, Nott."

"Come on, we're going to have to celebrate lots after the Slytherin team crushes the quidditch season this year."

My eyes perked up at this comment. "So you made the team? Way to go, Theo!" I nuzzled into his shoulder as a congratulatory gesture.

He shrugged bashfully, a slight pink tint appearing on his cheeks. "No need to make a fuss, I've made the team for four years straight."

I pulled away from him and gazed at his bright blue eyes, slightly glossy with what seemed like contentment. "Still, I'm very proud of you. Did you... make seeker? I remember you saying you were considering it."

He looked down, suddenly seeming a tad embarrassed. "Uh, no... I— I couldn't... I settled for chaser again."

"What do you mean you 'couldn't'? They wouldn't let you try out for it?"

"Something like that... don't worry about it, y/n. I'm perfectly alright with chaser for another season," he plastered a weak grin on his face, clearly trying to appear fine with it.

I sighed breathily, not quite believing it but accepting his wishes of being left alone. "Alright, fine. But as a congratulations, I'm buying you a butterbeer in honor of your four-years-running chaser success."

He looked up again to meet my gaze, a real smile taking the place of that obviously fake one he donned just a moment ago.

I made my way to snag a couple drinks as well as some snacks for us before coming back to sit down. I made sure to get up and bring it over myself, otherwise Theo would undoubtedly try and pay for it regardless of my offer. I sat his butterbeer down on the table and gently slid it over to him a few inches from myself.

"Thanks, y/n, you're a gem," he grinned, taking a sip of his drink.

"Anything for our resident champion," I teased, making him blush again.

"Quit with the compliments, I know I'm godly but a man can only take so many in one sitting," he brushed it off, still donning a toothy grin as he continued gulping his drink.

After some typical Theo chat, mostly him gossiping about whatever was going on with Blaise or his other friends, he insisted we walk around for a bit. Theo was more useful than a newsletter; he seemed to know everything about everyone at all times.

"I could use a female opinion on something," he confessed, as we walked into a clothing and jewelry shop. "My sister's birthday is coming up and I haven't the slightest idea what to get her. Might you suggest something?"

"I think I have to," I giggled. "After seeing what you got her last year, you need help."

He rolled his eyes at my light hearted joke, taking it awfully personal. "Hey, she loved those candies I bought her!"

"Yeah, until the acid pop burned a hole in her tongue so badly that she needed to go to the hospital wing."

He playfully shoved my arm as we made a slow saunter throughout the store. Some of the clothes were quite cute, but Theo refused to let her wear any of it. Being the protective older brother he was, he didn't want her looking attractive to any boy in the school, whatsoever.

"Just what I need: to watch out for some older Slytherin punk to protect her from," he rolled his eyes when I held up a pink skirt, on the shorter side. "There's no way my baby sister is wearing any of this."

"Theo, she's sixteen. I'm sure she'd love something like this," I motioned to the racks of similar, shorter clothes.

"Doesn't matter. I know what guys want and... unfortunately, it's this," he sighed, distraught at the thought of his sister off with some boy, one like him, or worse. He knew the types of guys that his house had, and their track record wasn't too impressive.

"You know, you're lucky you had someone like Diggory," he scoffed, moving over to the jewelry section as he gawked at some of the necklaces on display. "That's not someone I had to protect you from."

I looked at him confusedly. "Protect me? Theo, you couldn't protect yourself from a niffler if you tried," I dryly joked.

"You know what I mean, y/n. He and I aren't friends but know each other from quidditch, locker room talks and all. He's an alright guy; never had a bad word to say about you, and I heard a lot over two years," he continued peering at the displays.

I know it wasn't Theo's fault, but it was hard getting over Cedric when things around me constantly reminded me of him.

Prefect meetings were especially the worst. Multiple times a week I was forced to sit in a small group and listen to every word he had to say as Head Boy, and I couldn't look away for more than a minute without Malfoy suggesting to the group that I'm not paying attention because I've lost interest in the position. Truth be told, it was difficult having to see Cedric and fight the urge to jump in his arms and be engulfed in his embrace like I so often used to. I appreciated having a moment to myself to try and shake my feelings in the meetings.

It seemed like the more often our group met, the more I missed Cedric. I had gone a whole month without seeing him, after I broke things off with him, then to seeing him regularly throughout the week at Hogwarts. It was a change I hadn't adapted to.

"I suppose, but you know it has to be over between us. There's nothing I could do about it," I told Theo who weakly smiled at me, apologetically.

"It's a shame your husband can't even make an effort to be a decent person," he added.

Upon hearing that, my neck craned to scan the surroundings and make sure nobody around us heard that. After seeing that there was nobody else on our side of the store, I visibly relaxed, sighing and pressing my hand to my forehead with ease.

"Sorry about that," he brushed a lock of his wavy brown hair out of his eyes. "Lucky we're alone."

I gave him a half-hearted smile and silently continued on the prowl for a gift for his sister.

I searched a few glass-covered displays until I stumbled upon a gorgeous gold necklace. It reached a bit past the collarbone, with a diamond crescent moon attached to the same clasp of two smaller golden stars. No doubt it would be expensive, but cost was no hindering factor for a family like the Nott's. I grabbed Theo by the upper arm and he bent down to look at it.

"What do you think?" I asked him, slightly turning my neck to face him close by, just a few inches away from me.

He looked from me to the necklace, observing it for a moment and back again to meet my gaze. "It's... beautiful, y/n. I don't know if it's quite for her, but it's lovely."

I stood up straight again and slightly distanced myself from him, Theo following suit. "We can keep looking. I just thought that one was... quite captivating," my eyes naturally dragged back down to it, observing all its features.

I considered buying it just for myself; money, like for Theo and other pureblood families, was nothing to worry about for me. I could definitely indulge in a fancy necklace if I chose to do so. However, I figured this was not the time. We were looking for someone else, and I couldn't act selfishly by purchasing it myself.

"I think it would suit you better," he returned to look down at it in its small display case.

"Don't worry about it, Nott. Let's keep looking," I grasped his forearm once more and pointed us in the direction of some earrings instead.

While we kept searching for the perfect gift, he returned his attention to the necklace I had my eye on. He insisted it would be fitting for me, but I just smiled and tried to distract him with other jewelry.

After some failed attempts of getting him to pick something else out, he finally settled on a pair of emerald earrings that he decided would go well with his sister's school uniforms best.

"They're not perfect, but they'll do," he gave me a lopsided grin as the cashier wrapped up the earrings for him. "She'll like them regardless. If it's shiny, she'll take it."

As we walked out of the store, Theo turned to me and ran a hand through his shaggy hair. In the midday sun it actually made him look quite handsome, the natural highlights being accentuated and contrasting well with his light eyes. I knew lots of girls had crushes on him, but it wasn't something that I ever really considered. It was undeniable that he was easy on the eyes, though.

"You didn't get that necklace for yourself," he started. "Were you waiting for me to offer to buy it for you?"

"What?" I looked up at him surprised. I wasn't offended, but more so taken aback at that question. "No, of course not. Why would you ask that?"

He shrugged. "Other girls would. And there was only one... why let it get away from you?"

"This trip wasn't for me, Theo. We were finding something for your sister. And I've got enough necklaces... leaving one behind won't hurt."

"I suppose. It's just... nice spending time with a girl who isn't self-absorbed," he weakly smiled. "You even bought me that butterbeer."

"Oh, please. It was just a drink."

"I know, but it was kind of you. That's not something you see from a lot of girls, especially in our house. You know Daphne wouldn't have done that."

"Theo, seriously, don't stress about it. You invited me out to Hogsmeade and I thank you for that. It's been a nice afternoon and I appreciate us spending the day together."

He nodded, seemingly understanding what I was getting at. He pointed in the direction of Honeydukes.

"Come on then, let me buy you something in return for that butterbeer."

"I told you, that was just for you making chaser on the quid—"

"Then it'll be a thank you for helping me pick out these earrings."

I gave him a bashful smile, then shrugged, defeatedly. "Fine, but don't even think of giving me any acid pops."

Chapter Text

A rhythmic knock at the door interrupted my early midday study session.

Damn Advanced History of Magic; I couldn't keep thinking about broom history for another minute or I'd internally combust. I mentally chided myself for even taking the course. Professor Binns was as boring as the day is long, to add to my torment. Having a ghost as a teacher is strange enough as it is, but then putting students to sleep is almost comic.

I slammed my textbook closed and pushed it to the side of my desk as I got up to check who might've been visiting. It couldn't be Daphne; although she regularly forgot the key to our dorm room, I knew she took it with her today. She's started wearing it on a chain around her neck to make sure she can't lose it anymore.

I swung open the door to reveal the familiar face of Cedric Diggory, the boy who I was desperately trying to forget. I was mildly stunned, not expecting him whatsoever.

He was always a handsome boy, but standing at the doorway of my room, along with the added suspense of knowing that I can't have him, made him more irresistible. It almost seemed like the restraints placed on me only made me find him all the more attractive as he stood there with a crooked smile.

Seeing as it was a weekend without classes, he wore comfortable clothes that I remembered well; he'd typically dress like that on his off days. He wore a cream colored cashmere sweater and black slacks, the neutral tones of his clothes accentuating his bright blue eyes and honey-brown highlights of his hair.

His hair looked extra soft; he'd probably washed it this morning. I could tell by how it was parted on the left side, which he always did after it was dried from a shower. Throughout the day, it naturally tousled itself which I used to prefer, but when he was standing in front of me at that doorway, I wanted nothing more than to mess it up myself.

"Morning, y/n," he half-heartedly grinned.

I gave an awkward cough, still processing that he was here.

"Uh, good morning, Cedric," I politely replied, my eyebrows slightly furrowing at his presence. "How'd you... get in here?"

The Slytherin entrance was heavily guarded, and our password was changed fortnightly. I couldn't imagine that the dungeons stone wall would so willingly let in a Hufflepuff, on his own merit.

I had snuck him into my room on a number of occasions, but that was different; I gained rightful entry and he just passed through afterward.

"Oh, right," he chuckled, alleviating some of the tension. "I saw Nott up in the Great Hall and told him I needed to speak with you... he accompanied me to open the entrance. As for your room, I figured it was the same room as last year." A small blush tinted the high points of his chiseled cheeks as he mentioned my room, probably a tad embarrassed for admitting he remembered where it was.

I found solace in knowing that, at least, that means he hasn't forgotten all the things we did together.

"That was... nice of him," I nodded. I dryly coughed again before straightening my posture to make better eye contact with him. He still towered over me, however. "You needed to speak with me?"

He reached into his pocket and pulled out an envelope, sealed with an "S" wax stamp. It smelled fresh, like it had been melted and poured just hours ago. The other side of the envelope had my name written across it in somewhat rushed, but still beautiful calligraphy. The ink was slightly splotched at the end of my name, but the prints were fine.

His arm extended over to me, his long, slender fingers momentarily brushing against mine as he handed me the envelope. His hand was warm, like always. Never cold, or unwelcoming, but comfortable and mellow in feeling. I could still feel the tingles of excitement on my fingers from when our skin brushed.

I grasped the envelope between my fingers as he pulled away and I looked up at him quizzically. "What might this be?"

He shoved his hands into his pockets, slouching slightly. "I saw Professor Slughorn earlier today, he asked me to deliver some books for him. I saw a stack of envelopes on his desk and... your name was on this one."

"So he asked you to deliver it to me? You're his messenger boy now?" I cracked a lame joke, hoping to make him smile.

It seemed I succeeded, as indicated by half-grin he donned. "No, actually. I offered to give it to you."

"You did?"

His right hand lifted out of his pocket and reached the back of his neck, scratching it bashfully. It was a nervous tick of his that I used to find adorable.

"Well, I knew I'd see you at some point anyway, at our prefect meetings. I could've waited a few more days, but I figured why not expedite the process?"

My gaze shifted between the envelope and Cedric. There was no doubt that he was shy; maybe he regretted coming all the way to my dorm to deliver this. After all, it certainly said something about our relationship, or at least his feelings, being more than just formal if he took the initiative to come all the way down here.

"I appreciate it," I gave him a warm smile. "Thank you, Cedric."

His nerves appeared to melt away the slightest bit once I smiled at him, because he returned it with one of his own. Probably the first real smile I've seen him have in quite a while.

"Would you like to come in?"

Once the words left my mouth, I knew I was playing a risky game. But I couldn't help it, the question flew out as if I couldn't avoid it happening, it was just instinctual.

His eyebrows bounced up, likely out of surprise. In his defense, I somewhat couldn't believe that I said that either.

"Are you sure? I don't want to impose or anything... I just came over for that letter."

Sure, Cedric. As much as we'd both like to believe that, he wouldn't have gone out of his way to come into my House without some other purpose, whether or not he even realized it.

I nodded, moving to the side to make room for him to walk in. "Might as well find out what's in this letter together."

Cedric cautiously stepped in, like he hadn't ever been in here before. He gawked around a bit, but in his defense, I'd changed some of the decorations since last year and moved some furniture around. He was opposed to sitting down at first, but eventually I coerced him into sitting on the edge of my bed.

He hunched over, with his forearms on his lap and hands folded as he looked around a bit more. I sat at the chair at my desk, repositioned to face him.

"Your room's pretty," he complimented, eyes shifting from thing to thing. A poster, a stack of books, the pillows I had scattered at the window. "Different, but pretty."

"I'm sure it's not as nice as yours," I replied. "Having that lone dorm to yourself must be nice."

He grinned. "Being Head Boy does have its advantages, but the dorm to myself is probably my favorite. Well, one of them, anyway."

"What are some of the other ones?" I leaned back in my chair.

He shook his head and motioned to the envelope in my hand. "Don't worry about it. You should open your invitation."

"Invitation?" I cocked my head.

He grimaced, looking frustrated with himself. "Sorry, y/n, I shouldn't have spoiled it. While I was talking with the professor, he gave me one, too. It's an invitation for the Slug Club."

My demeanor perked up, eyebrows arching in amusement. "Really? Oh, I didn't think I'd get invited. Well, thank you, Ced," I thanked him and ripped open the envelope.

Inside, as Cedric indicated, was a somewhat sloppily written invitation to his Slug Club which stated our group would be having at least monthly dinners, and we're welcome to attend. My eyes scanned over the letter, but there was nothing too personal written. I assumed he must have written up quite a few and just personalized our names.

"So you've gotten one, too?"

"Yes, somehow," he lightly chuckled. "I don't know what I did to deserve it, but I'm quite honored to be invited. I've heard that it was very impressive back when he first taught at Hogwarts."

"Of course you got in, Cedric. You're Head Boy, the Hufflepuff seeker, related to a former Minister of Magic, for Merlin's sake. I swear, the list of things you haven't done is shorter than what you have," I smiled.

Cedric leaned back, his forearms now behind him, leaning on my bed as his shoulders slumped. A cheeky grin formed on his lips, looking content with himself. I hadn't been trying to bolster his ego, but he certainly had no business being modest with his set of accomplishments under his belt.

As he leaned back, his natural way of getting more comfortable, he looked more attractive than he had when he first sat down. He took up more space, his legs jutting out and stretching, while his arms behind him took up half of my bed. His slim figure looked taller and more confident.

"You flatter me, y/n. And what about you? Prefect, chess club, top grades even with the most advanced classes Hogwarts offers, and you're a Vitelli, to name just a few. And none of those even consider what a wonderful person you are, in general. No wonder you got in."

I looked down at the parchment in my hand and fiddled with it as I tried to distract myself from the bright red blush that was undoubtedly forming on my face. I could feel the heat of my skin rising and didn't want him to see, although it would be inevitable. How could I not? The boy that I was in love with until we were ripped apart from each other was complimenting all my best qualities. He was sitting on my bed, looking handsome as ever, and I had to use all the restraint in my being to not give into what I was feeling.

"Are you alright, y/n?" His smooth voice inquired. I had been avoiding his gaze for a few moments now, and he could definitely tell that something was wrong. He was excellent at knowing when I was feeling off.

I ran a hand through my hair and placed the parchment on the desk behind me. I rubbed my hands, slick with sweat from nerves, onto my pants to relax myself as I built up the courage to look up at him with sincerity.

"I think I owe you an apology, Cedric."

His eyes narrowed. "What are you talking about? You... don't owe me anything. Not anymore, at least."

Clearly, he was referring to us being split up. I supposed there was no way of avoiding the topic sooner or later. I had been seeing him on a regular basis, and he had a personality hard to stay away from.

It just hurt that it was still fresh in his mind.

"For everything. You deserve so much better, and I can't tell you how sorry I am for just... ruining everything."

"You didn't ruin anything. It must have been my fault... perhaps I wasn't treating you right, or didn't give you enough love. I can't think of any other reason you'd just end things so abruptly."

I sighed at his words. Him saying that was enough to shatter my heart in two. It was too much knowing that he thought he was the reason that we broke up... maybe I should have just told him at the time.

No, I couldn't have. But perhaps I should have.

"I can assure you, it wasn't your fault at all. It was... entirely me."

He lightly scoffed. "'It's not you, it's me'? Really, y/n? I never thought I'd hear you say that. I can handle it, I'll be a man about my faults. I'd just... like to know what it was. If you'll tell me, that is."

"Nothing, I promise you did absolutely nothing. And I'm sorry, I should have worded it better; I didn't mean to give you a cliché like that. Especially since in this case, you truly didn't do anything wrong."

He sat up straighter and ran a hand through his hair, tousling it and letting loose locks of hair fall over his forehead with a slight curl. His blue eyes peaked through messy strands of hair before he pushed them out of his line of sight, making more serious eye contact with me.

"Then what was the reason?"

"I— I'm sorry, Cedric," I sighed, defeated. "I just can't tell you."

He inhaled deeply before standing up and making his way for the door. I promptly stood up and reached to grab his arm, pulling him back. To my surprise, he didn't make an effort of shaking off my grasp.

"Where are you going, Ced?"

"Don't call me that, please," he shook his head. "I just can't stand being around you when it's like this... you know, I came here to give you that letter, but also in some hopes that we could just be okay again. Get rid of whatever tension there's been between us."

"You've felt it too? That awkwardness, the need to say the things unspoken."

He turned around again to face me. His puffed out chest made him appear taller and more domineering than he had been this whole conversation. His voice changed from soft and sensitive like it was a moment ago, to more assertive and decisive.

"Of course I've felt it, y/n! How could I not? The way that I feel every time I see you at prefect meetings, knowing you're not mine, the passing greetings in corridors, or the way you ignore me completely at mealtimes. It takes over every aspect of my life!"

"Cedric, I— I had no idea you felt this way..." I looked down, ashamed at the way I'd handled the entire situation.

I'd been so focused on my own problems that I didn't even consider how he might feel about everything.

"Of course, I've felt this way... Merlin, I tried to get rid of these feelings since you broke up with me, but how can I do that when you're still such a big part of my life?"

I stepped back, trying to put some distance between us as I took deep breaths and regained my composure. This was the most emotional conversation we'd had in a long time, and it was difficult to air out everything I wanted to, but just couldn't.

I sat down on the edge of my bed, with him trailing behind me. Sitting down and looking up at him, he seemed to have more softened features. He could never stay mad at me for long, even when I did something worthy of being upset with. It was in his nature to be calm, which made me feel all the more remorseful.

"I'll resign from my position as prefect. You need some time to heal, and it'll be better for both—"

"No, y/n, don't do that. It won't solve anything. Why can't we just sort this out? I'm not asking for us to get back together again, but we can at least be cordial with each other, can't we? I just want that tension gone; to be able to see you again, maybe spend time together or hang out like we used to. As much as possible, anyway. Even if we're not together, I'll always appreciate your company and friendship. Don't take that away from me, please."

I stared at my hands in my lap, avoiding his gaze. I wouldn't allow myself to cry in front of him, or it'd be too obvious that I still wanted him. However, that didn't stop my breathing from getting heavier or the slight tremble of my hands.

Noticing this, he lowered himself down onto his knees, so that he was slightly lower than eye level with me. "If you don't want me in your life, tell me, y/n. I can deal with this on my own, try to pretend like none of it ever happened. I won't make a fuss out of it, or make things awkward when we see each other. I just need you to tell me, so I can do it."

He reached for my hands and cupped them comfortingly. My smaller hands fit so perfectly in his larger ones, and he warmed them up quickly. Their slight trembling seemed to halt as I forced myself to look up at him.

"Cedric, if I could, I would tell you everything. What happened and why I broke things off between us... I never meant to hurt you. Merlin, that's the last thing I wanted to do. It kills me to know that you feel this way, and I can't apologize enough. Please just know that I never want you out of my life... I can't handle it," I choked out, taking many deep breaths between my shaky words.

"You don't? Does that mean that we can still be friends?" His fingers slightly parted, gently rubbing my hands from my wrists to my fingertips to calm me down.

I forced a smile to stop the tears that would otherwise well up if I didn't. It was a plastered, ingenuine smile, but he returned it just the same.

"I've tried these past few weeks living without you and it hasn't been manageable. You have to know that things can't be the same as they once were, but there's nothing I'd love more than for us to still be friends."

A real, beaming smile grew on his lips to replace the obviously fake one that had just been there. His cheeks tinted pink and his chest heaved up and down, like he'd been holding in his breath.

I don't think I'd seen him so happy in months.

"That's... that's wonderful. I promise, I won't waste this chance you've given me. Even, as just friends. I'll take what I can get."

Chapter Text

I couldn't figure why I bother listening to anything Theo says, but especially when it comes to quidditch.

Just like the Hogsmeade trip, he had somehow coerced me into coming to watch him in the first match of the season.

He kind of sucked.

Well, to be completely fair, he wasn't the only one who sucked. But he certainly contributed to the team's overall lack of success. Theo, along with fellow chasers Adrian Pucey and Marcus Flint, were struggling, to say the least.

They'd only scored three goals each, totaling thirty points, since the start of the game, while the Hufflepuff chasers had already scored a whopping eighty. Each of our chasers only made one goal each; they'd been rusty since the start of the season.

I was sitting up with Daphne in our house's green stands, watching from high above the ground. Heights usually made me sick, but I had casted a spell before the game to wash away any nausea.

I didn't like going to quidditch games at the best of times, but this was certainly one of the worse times.

Many of the players zipped by the stands so quickly I could hardly make out who they even were. Quick whooshes of air signaled that someone had flown by, but by the time I noticed, they were long gone and chasing some other player or barreling toward the hoops.

If anything was to be said about Slytherin house, they hated losing. Unfortunately, that meant my eardrums were likely to be blown out by my fellow peers hollering as loud as they could. Some were yelling at certain players, others just shouting out indistinct upset noises.

I vaguely made out certain phrases like "Slytherin's the best!" and "catch the snitch!", the likes of which I tried to tune out and just focus on the game.

"Malfoy's actually doing pretty well!" Daphne shouted close to my ear, trying to let herself be heard above the angry noises of our housemates spectating.

My focus, which was shifting rapidly between Theo and Cedric, changed course and landed on Draco, who was inching closer and closer to the snitch.

He was sweated out, his easily-noticeable platinum hair slick with perspiration but being largely unnoticed as he dashed by, his speed making it blow behind him. One of Draco's long, slender arms was outstretched as he desperately tried to push his fingertips closer to the snitch that seemed to be getting nearer to his area of reach.

My vision started to blur as I watched him zip around the field, but I refocused so that the only thing on my mind was Draco.

"At least he's good for something," I retorted back to Daphne, my gaze fixated on our seeker.

It seemed as if Draco's struggling would soon be realized by catching the snitch, but when his hand was within just a few inches of the small winged ball, the figure of Cedric Diggory rose up next to him, equally determined to catch it.

Cedric had been doing presumably better up until a few moments ago in the game. All during the match, he seemed as if he was closer to the snitch, but thanks to an aggressive bludger shot at him by Lucian Bole on Slytherin, he was almost knocked clear off his broom, giving Draco the advantage for a short while. However, Cedric was simply too good. He regained his composure, mid-air, and somehow got back on his broom and caught up to Draco again.

The snitch darted down toward the ground, which sent both Draco and Cedric to dive after it. The two looked like parallels of each other, just desperately trying to be the one that caught it as it flitted its wings in a quick descent. The only noticeable difference between them, besides their house colors, was the way that Draco looked connivingly determined to win while Cedric seemed simply focused on himself.

When the two were just mere feet off the ground, the snitch seemed to slow, causing the boys to give each other a competitive glance at each other and take off for it with even greater force.

By this point, everyone had been ignoring what was happening with the other players; it was simply down to the two seekers and what would happen with the snitch. It felt like I couldn't tear my eyes away from them; one being the boy that I still was obsessed with, and the other that I should be obsessed with.

Focusing on the two, it seemed like Draco was becoming more and more frustrated with Cedric. Being a little taller, Cedric's reach was a tad longer than Draco's and it seemed like he would be the one who would catch the snitch. It was zig zagging around, to the left, the right, forward and then in either direction again, which the boys followed intensely.

If there was one thing that was obvious by watching Draco chase the golden ball, it was that he was getting tired of the snitch's theatrics. So, in traditional Draco fashion, he resorted to playing the only way he knew how: dirty.

Draco clearly and intentionally hurdled his broom to the right, into Cedric's side, causing him to be swiftly pushed and fall off his broom with a quick vigor, crashing to the ground. I could see Draco with a wicked laugh, pleased with himself that Cedric was out of the way.

However, this was before the shock set in on his face: he couldn't see the snitch in front of him.

During the time that he was sizing up Cedric and looking to knock him off his broom, the little snitch had darted to the right, toward Cedric who was close enough to catching it fairly. Draco was so consumed with trying to cheat his way to a win, that he had unknowingly just lost himself the game.

By pushing Cedric off his broom, he gave him the extra leverage that he needed to capture the snitch. In the time that he had fallen off and toward the ground, he somehow caught it in the air on his descent down.

Cedric had fallen face down, his arms hidden by his torso on the ground.

He shook his head, looking like he was trying to regain his composure, then slowly standing up, keeping one hand clutched to his chest.

After a moment, he turned to the crowd and a handsome smile appeared on his lips. He pumped his fist into the air, opening it to reveal the golden snitch between his fingers.

Cheers erupted from the Hufflepuff side of the pitch, while my housemates began angrily yelling, shouting profanities and obscenities; some at the players, some in general. Draco was getting his fair share of insults, but he certainly deserved them after trying to hurt Ced like that. A spew of vague words like "screw Malfoy" and "new seeker" could be heard from the crowd's utterings.

Not wanting to tolerate any further roars from in the stands, which was still continuing long after the game finished, Daphne and I held onto each other tightly as we weaved our way down to the bottom of the pitch. She and I had to endure lots of furious Slytherins bumping into us and nearly knocking us down. When we made it to the ground, she took off to meet one of the Slytherin players that she was closer with, while I decided to stay back and wait for Theo. It was his fault I was there, anyway.

After the announcements were made that Hufflepuff had won the game and Madam Hooch crowned the badgers the winners, a storm of yellow and black blurred my vision as I saw masses of Hufflepuffs all gathering together to hoist Cedric into the air, still holding the snitch.

Although it was my house that had lost, I felt a strange sense of pride that I hadn't in a long time. Watching Cedric be congratulated and celebrated by his teammates was comforting; I was so happy that something went his way. He deserved it, after working so hard the entire game. It would have been a shame if Draco had won after trying to steal the game from him.

In the midst of everyone crowding around Cedric, our gaze met for a brief moment. He smiled at me, an affectionate, genuine smile that would have warmed the entire quidditch pitch if everyone noticed. I mouthed a "congratulations" to him and waved softly, which he returned with a "thank you" before being ripped apart from our contact prematurely. I figured as much; he was the star player. He couldn't waste too much time looking at any one person.

"Watching your loverboy over there?" I heard the smooth voice of Theo rounding behind me.

"Just the person I was waiting for," I turned to look at him, smirking playfully. "I had to do something while you made a lousy one goal."

He grimaced, jokingly. "Not our best game for you to come to. Especially not for me... damn Pucey, hardly let me get the quaffle."

"I'm only kidding, Theo. You did fine, like always," I smiled, pulling him in for a hug, then backing up immediately after feeling his damp sweat clinging to his uniform. "But maybe a congratulations would be better in order after a shower."

He chuckled, throwing his head back. "You're probably right. I don't think this is what the ladies are talking about when they say they like a manly musk," he sniffed under his arm and cringed.

"Gross, Nott," I laughed, lightly smacking his arm. "You know, you actually weren't that bad. If anything, you were the best of the chasers—"

My compliments to Theo were harshly interrupted when a seething Draco walked up to us, grabbing Theo by the forearm. "Nott, we've got to talk."

Draco's gaze on Theo was narrow and his voice husky and deep. He looked frustrated, which could be understood from how the game had just gone.

"Relax, Draco. I'm having a conversation here," Theo scoffed dismissively, motioning over to me.

"Doesn't matter," he quipped. "Uh, Captain's orders... calling an... urgent team meeting."

Theo rolled his eyes. "I'm starting to regret voting you team captain, especially after this."

I let out a dry laugh. "Malfoy, team captain? No wonder Slytherin didn't win."

"Watch your mouth, Vitelli. I don't see you contributing to the team. If you want to be our strategist, be my guest," Draco sneered, his voice laced with malice.

"Malfoy, you're in no position to be upset with anyone other than yourself. You do realize that you just lost Slytherin the game because you weren't good enough to win fair and square?"

"It's called high risk, high reward," he defended, puffing out his chest to appear domineering.

"It's called being an idiot."

"Shut it, y/n, you're barely a real Slytherin let alone on this team. Now beat it, before I make you wish you hadn't came today."

"After seeing you fuck up the game, I already wish I hadn't came today."

Theo stifled a snorty laugh at that, which caused him to bring his hand to his mouth to cover up the smile that was undoubtedly spread across his face. I could hear his muffled chuckles peaking out from underneath his fingers.

"Something funny, Nott?" Draco turned his attention to my giggly friend, who was trying to calm himself down of the blush that was tinting his cheeks. Draco was already furious, but now he looked like he was ready to kill Theo.

"J-just... nothing," he coughed, becoming in control of his laughter again. He visibly calmed down, standing up straighter and his eyes narrowing. He looked behind me, likely at the honey badgers basking in their cheers then back to Draco. "Let's get out of here before these pesky Hufflepuffs rub it in our faces."

"Don't you think they deserve to?" I reeled to make Draco angrier.

It seems I succeeded, as Draco slowly craned his neck to look back down at me, eyes shooting daggers. His nostrils flared in response to the upward sneer of his lip. His lowered voice hinted with spite whispered, "Run off to your mudblood paramour. He could bask in some more attention after his glorious victory today."

"How many times do I have to say it? He's not my—"

Before I could finish my defense, I felt a tap on my shoulder which prompted me to instinctively turn around and be faced with a warm look from Cedric.

"Cedric! Merlin, congratulations!" I yelped, throwing my arms around his neck.

I felt his strong arms lock around my waist, causing my breath to hitch. I hadn't expected this to be a genuine hug, but more of a short-lived, congratulatory gesture. Much to my surprise, he lowered his chin to rest on my shoulder and his arms around my waist lingered for a moment before pulling away.

It was the best feeling I'd had in a long time.

Everything felt alive again; my skin was tingling from the sensations he left behind.

"Thank you, y/n," he smiled, his teeth almost shining white. "Sorry to interrupt your..." he motioned to the two Slytherins walking away briskly toward what I assumed was their locker room. I wasn't surprised that they had left without saying goodbye. Draco was getting lots of insults being thrown at him left and right.

"Don't worry about it," I assured him, my gaze lingering on Theo and Draco for a moment. Draco was dragging Theo by the arm to wherever they were headed, clearly shouting something at him which I couldn't make out. We made eye contact for a split second before my attention returned to Cedric. Draco looked irritated.

"Right... listen, I'm glad you came today," he grinned. "I know your house was playing today, too. But still, it was nice just... seeing you. In the crowd, I mean."

"I definitely feel the same," I nodded. "It was nice seeing you so... happy. And clearly doing so well with quidditch; the game was yours from the beginning."

He blushed, his hand coming to scratch the back of his neck. "Thanks, y/n, but you're too kind. To be fair, your house put up a hell of a fight. Especially that Nott, seems like a decent bloke."

I snickered, "Ced, you don't have to lie. They were awful, including Theo. As much as I love the guy, you were the best today."

He let out a hearty chuckle, then shifted his weight to one leg in a somewhat nervous fashion. "You flatter me. Always have after a game."

"Some things never change, I suppose. Especially when you play that well."

He grinned to himself, looking down at his feet. He cleared his throat, letting out a light cough before looking back up to meet my gaze. "Listen, y/n, I understand if you're not interested... but my house is having a party later tonight to celebrate the first win of the season. Like I said, I get if you'd rather not, but you're welcome to come... in fact, I'd like you to. If you're comfortable, that is."

I looked up at him and smiled. In the moment, I wasn't thinking about house loyalties, or how it would look to our friends, or even the implied romantic undertones attached to the invitation. All I was thinking about was wanting to celebrate the victory of a person I truly cared about; someone that had always been there for me and I always wanted the best for. Perhaps it wasn't the best choice to go, or to accept so soon, but none of that occurred to me when I uttered a sweet "yes" to him.

The look on his face said it all. He looked happier than when he caught the snitch.

Chapter Text

I clung onto Cedric's arm as he guided me through the mob of sweaty, mostly drunken Hufflepuffs in their common room. The music was blasting so loudly, I could feel the vibrations from the bass pounding in my chest and rising up to my ears, feeling like they would pop at any given moment.

My grasp on his forearm was tight as he was weaving his way through the crowd, saying a quick "hello" to anyone giving him a passing congratulations on catching the snitch. I kept my eyes glued to the back of his head, the honey-brown highlights of his hair that I loved being hidden by the dimmed light of the party.

I noticed a few familiar faces either out dancing or huddled up in a corner that certainly weren't from Hufflepuff. Mostly the outsiders were Gryffindor, but there were a healthy amount of Ravenclaws and a sprinkling of Slytherins scattered about.

We had just spent some time in a corner with his best friends chatting away (as much as we could, anyway) and laughing together over things in our lives. It felt natural, like old times, just inserting myself into their group since Cedric wanted me there. But after a long while, he pulled me away and dragged me from the group.

"Fancy a dance?" Cedric's head was lowered so that his lips were close to my ear. Under any other circumstances, I'd be putty in his hands, but seeing as he was almost shouting it to be heard, I was mostly unaffected.

"Anything you want, seeker," I smiled up, earning a pleased grin from him.

I probably should have noticed, but the whole time he had been leading us to the center of the common room, wedged right between sweaty bodies of dancing Hufflepuffs. I tried to keep a slight distance from him to start, but nondescript students bumped into me from every which way, causing Cedric and I to be pressed up against each other in no time.

Us being so close felt tensely awkward at first, but the combination of his familiar touch and everyone else's proximity keeping us together made it all seem natural in just a short while. The warmth of his body was radiating onto me and it heated me up even more than I already was.

Cedric was completely unlike any other person at the party. He seemed happy and content by just being there, acknowledging a few of his friends as they passed by, but otherwise keeping his focus entirely on me. Apart from intervals of just a few seconds to see his housemates, his gaze didn't stray from mine once. Like although we were swarmed by masses of people, I was the only person he saw.

The lighting was dark, but his eyes bore into mine. Small rays of light bounced off his blue eyes and made him appear all the more mysterious and handsome as I saw myself reflected in his widened pupils. The dim lighting and our bodies pressed together made it so that although I couldn't see everything, I could feel his every thought. When I wrapped my arms around his neck and his breath hitched, or when his arms around my waist made his fingertips tremble. I could sense how I made him react physically, which I could only assume equated to how he was emotionally.

The only caveat to that being he could do the same to me; he could tell what I was feeling without me having to say it. There was no doubt he knew that my hands sliding down from his shoulders to arms meant I was reveling in how good he felt, or pressing my nose into the crook of his neck meant I was trying to further consume myself in his scent.

There was something comforting about his scent; it was the same sensation as coming home to a warm dinner or snuggling up on the couch reading a book. In fact, there was something comforting just about him. He never failed to settle my nerves, and although he made me flush or teased me romantically, I felt safe in his presence. The type of safe that you never want to leave, and if I let go of him, I'd be giving up that feeling.

That was why even when he pulled away and asked me to follow him for a break from dancing, I clung to his arm like my life depended on it. I'd been without his feeling of security for so long since we broke up that I needed to make up for lost time somehow, unfortunately still with him.

He brought me over to a far corner away from the party which I remembered well from the times I'd snuck in here before in the past two years. Cedric came upon a shelf fastened with Hufflepuff memorabilia and whispered some revealing spell, which cast aside the shelf and appeared a secret room behind the shelf.

There were plenty of other students in here, as well. Some were drinking or making out with their partners, doing Merlin knows what else. But for the most part, it was much quieter. The muffled pounding of the sound from the main room was audible, and I could still feel the, lessened but still present, vibrations in my chest from the noise. Like in the main room, there were a variety of other students, all from different houses.

My grasp on Cedric's forearm slipped down to his fingers as he led me over to a couch on the right side of the room. "This one fine?" he asked at a normal volume, motioning to the couch which I remembered all too well from years past. My fingers lightly tangled with his until we sat down, pulling away.

"It's perfect," I took a seat beside him, this time making sure to put some space between us. It wasn't an uncomfortable amount, but there were a few inches between each other's bodies which we did not account for while dancing.

My cheeks were hot and red, but I couldn't tell if that was from the dancing or the way I felt being with Cedric again tonight.

I think he noticed I was feeling a bit flushed, since he used wandless magic to fill up some cups and brought them over to us. He was showing off his skills a little, but I didn't mind. It was actually sort of cute that he was doing anything just to get my attention, as if he didn't already have it.

"Thanks, Ced," I sipped from the cup, trying to hydrate a little. The drink felt cool and relaxing as it flowed down my throat.

When I lowered the cup from my lips, I took the opportunity to gaze around the room. I hadn't been there in some time, but places like that never change, save for the people coming and going.

I noticed some of Cedric's Hufflepuff friends, some Ravenclaws and Gryffindors fraternizing, however my high came tumbling down when I saw Draco and Blaise huddled closely in one of the corners, opposite where Cedric and I were sat.

They weren't wearing any green or anything that would necessarily give away that they were Slytherins. Combined with the fact that most of the students here were in a hazed state, they probably slipped in unnoticed. They wore dark colors, which probably aided in being incognito.

Cedric followed my eyes and noticed them sitting there, essentially facing us since we were in opposite sides of the room. "Didn't expect to see them here," he drank from his cup.

"They have more nerve than I thought if they'd show up here after losing like that... after what he did to you."

He grinned playfully. "A little inter-house rivalry is always fun."

"I was invited, is the difference. Malfoy could've seriously hurt you with knocking you off your broom like that."

"With a scrawny figure like that? Malfoy couldn't hurt a fly."

I laughed. "Even so, it was a terrible thing to do. I don't know why he'd bother to come here and not cause some commotion. Not that he's in any position to do so, but..."

"Don't let him get under your skin. I know how much you hate him."

"You have no idea."

He shrugged, clearly not understanding my real meaning (which I was happy about). After another glance over at Draco and Blaise, I realized he was staring back at us, only more intensely.

His eyes shifted between Cedric and I rapidly, then whispered something to Blaise before repeating the process. It looked like they were gossiping about us, but there was nothing necessarily scandalous about the way we were together. Unless they saw us dancing together...

"We can go somewhere else?" Cedric suggested. "I don't want you uncomfortable with them being here. Malfoy can never just keep to himself..."

For a moment I wanted to, just to escape being in his line of sight. The way he was staring with the unnerving grimace on his lips made me want to go back in the main room just to avoid him altogether.

However, that would be accepting defeat. He'd know that he succeeded in making me uneasy, and I wouldn't have that.

"He can stare all he wants," I told Cedric, leaning back into the couch and getting comfortable. I took note of how Draco stiffened up and sneered at this.

"Of course," he grinned, mimicking my actions. He tapped the cup in his hands and traced the rim of it with his index finger, like he was nervous or trying to take his mind off something. The way he avoided my gaze affirmed this suspicion I had.

Right then, I should only be focusing on Cedric. Forget Draco across the room; he doesn't deserve anyone's attention after what he pulled today.

"Penny for your thoughts?" I mused.

He took a deep breath in, then exhaled accordingly. He shook his head lightly and looked up to make eye contact with me. The lighting in this room was slightly brighter than in the main room, so we could have a more decent conversation.

"It just feels a bit strange," he dryly chuckled, to alleviate some tension. "Us, being here together."

"I know what you mean. Things are different now, after all."

"Are they really, though?"

At first, I was tempted to ask what he meant by that. Of course, we were broken up, and unbeknownst to him, I was actually married... and to the boy who was sitting in the same room as us. But to him, all he saw was two teenagers who were shamelessly flirting with each other as they danced ever so closely to one another. I couldn't blame him for whatever thoughts were running through his head.

"One thing is, anyway."

We're not together.

He seemingly picked up on what I was insinuating and dropped it. He continued tracing the rim of his cup like he was lost in thought. I decided to break the silence by asking something more light-hearted.

"Is this party everything you thought it'd be? It's in your honor, after all."

A grin tugged on his lips, seemingly cheering him up a tad.

"It's been fine. I've been to plenty of these before, they're all the same. Drunken students just doing whatever they want for a few hours... I could take it or leave it."

"What would you rather be doing then?"

He scanned me up and down with a smirk playing on his lips. "Us talking is perfect enough."

The same blush from before took its place on my cheeks again, but this time I was sure it was from how Cedric was making me feel.

"You're extra flirty tonight, Ced," I lightly shoved his arm.

"You asked what I'd rather be doing and this is it," he smiled, before a look of concern came over him. "I apologize if I'm making you uncomfortable?"

I shook my head, "No, you're not. I'm just getting used to us being so close again."

"After our dance in there, I thought that's what you wanted? At least... in the moment you did."

Poor Cedric. For a second, I feared that I was leading him on.

But was I really? Leading him on? No, not really. I liked him. I wasn't just stringing along his emotions for my own entertainment; if anything, I was suffering more than he was. I actually knew that I couldn't have him, but he must have been under the assumption that we might get back together. He held out some hope. I had none since I knew better.

"Ced," I started, looking up at his eyes which were curiously staring back at me. "I think we should get something straight about tonight."

"Go on..." he sipped his drink.

"I don't know if I've given you the wrong impression, but this isn't a date. I thought our talk in my dorm the other day would have cleared that up; we're just friends."

I could see that hope he was holding out dissolve as I spoke. Deep down he must have known it to be true, but I'm sure that didn't mean it hurt any less when I said it.

"Right... friends. Friends who dance like that together. I... can live with that," he grimaced.

It was very obvious that he most certainly wasn't alright with it, but Cedric was too much of a gentleman to protest any further. If he argued, it would mean he didn't respect my decision, which wasn't in his nature to do so.

I brought my hand up to run my fingers through his hair. It was slightly damp with sweat, but there was no doubt mine was, too. I brushed a few strands off his forehead.

"I'm sorry, Ced. I probably shouldn't have done that. I mean, I wanted to dance with you, but I should've... restrained myself more."

"Restrained?" his eyes perked up. "So you do feel something?"

I dropped my hand immediately, pulling it back to my lap. "Let's not worry about it, okay? I'm a little tired, I think I'm going back to my dorm."

"This early?" he inquired skeptically, earning a nod from me. He hummed. "At least let me walk you back, then."

I wanted to protest, but he stood up and swiftly grabbed my hands to pull me up flush against him once more. I coughed and moved a few inches back from him, putting some distance between us which he definitely noticed.

Unlike before, I didn't hold onto Cedric's arm as we weaved through the hoards of people, I just remained a close distance behind him where we wouldn't be separated. He seemed less jovial than before, for obvious reasons. Now, when someone tried to grab his attention, his responses were shorter and less interactive than before.

We walked in silence back to the Slytherin common room. Luckily the Hufflepuff and Slytherin rooms are both on the same basement level which meant the walk over wasn't excruciatingly far. The only issue was the tension between us, growing with each step we took or breath exhaled.

"Listen, I wanted to thank you for coming," Cedric voiced, when we neared the blank wall which guards the common room. "I know things may not have ended the best, but until then, the night was very fun," he smiled.

What pained me the most was how through it all, Cedric was still as gentlemanly as ever. I'd just flirted with him and arguably toyed with his emotions before telling him we're just friends, and he still had the decency to walk me back to my house to make sure I was safe and sound, all with a smile on his face. Albeit, the smile may have been fake just to appear happier than he actually was, but his efforts did not go unnoticed.

I looked up at him with a smile parallel to his. "Of course, thank you for inviting me. I actually had a very good time... probably the best I've had in a long time."

"It was very nostalgic, almost. Of all the good times we used to have, and still have, clearly."

"Maybe next time you absolutely crush my house in a quidditch match we can do something else. Something more... calm," I mused. He seemed happy I suggested a next time would even be happening.

"As much as I'm looking forward to the next time, I have something for you now."

Oh, no. My mind scrambled of whatever it could be while he reached into his pocket and rummaged around. I prayed it was nothing overly romantic, not a necklace, or God forbid: a ring. I wouldn't know how to react if he offered me something so romantic and I would have to refuse it—

The snitch.

In the midst of my worrying, he had reached for my hand, opened up my fingers and dropped the small ball right in my palm.

"This?" I inquired, looking up at him.

I raised it up to get a better look at it. I'd never actually touched one before, just seen it at games. I'd never played quidditch and it was always so fascinating to me. Such a small little thing, yet so fast when activated. The way it flitted its wings across the pitch was so interesting; it could travel at such fast speeds and toy with the players whenever it wanted. Not to mention how gorgeous it was: the gold with silver accents made it look like a tiny trophy.

"I remember how you said you always wanted one. I was too stupid to give it to you then; I shouldn't have been collecting them like they were coins..." he shook his head, voice trailing off before he cleared his throat. "Anyway, after today's win, I insisted Hooch let me keep it. It's yours now."

I grabbed his hand and tried desperately to shove the snitch back into his palm. "No way, Cedric. You won, this is rightfully yours—"

"And I'm giving it to you. Please, don't think of it as anything more than it is."

"What is it, exactly?"

"A gift. From... a friend."

Chapter Text

"Where are you off to, Vitelli?"

Malfoy rounded the couch of the Slytherin common room where I had been sitting reading a book for an hour or so. However, I had just gotten a note from Granger saying that she needed to see me immediately.

"To see our Head Girl. She has some job for me, I'm assuming." I didn't mind doing patrols at night (especially since Draco had been skipping most of them lately), but every so often she'd ask me to do an odd job for her that randomly came up and she couldn't handle herself.

"I got the same instruction," he mused, holding up a slip of parchment. I tried to get a better look at it, and realized her owl had sent me the same message he held in his hands.

"Terrific," I sarcastically rolled my eyes. "Let's hope Granger has something extra tedious for you to attend to."

"Can you just tell me where the head girl dorm is? I've wasted enough breath on you as it is," he huffed.

"You don't know where it is?" I snorted. "I thought you had the intel on everything in this castle."

"Just point me in its direction and I'll do the rest," he mocked, throwing the parchment message on the couch, frustrated.

I picked up my bag that was resting on the seat next to me and cocked my head in the direction of the door. "Come on, I'm headed over anyway. I'll show you if you don't act like such a prick on the way there."

"I'll do my very best to control myself," he sarcastically replied.

I groaned and made my way out of the common room with Draco trailing behind me. He eventually caught up so we were side by side once we started making our way to the upper levels of the castle.

"The Head Boy and Girl are real lucky they get private dorms, all for just making other people do their own damn work," he huffed.

"Maybe you should've tried for Head Boy then," I snorted. "Get your own dorm far away from the rest of us in civil society."

"Come on, Vitelli. Don't act like you wouldn't love having a room all to yourself. It must get tiresome listening to Greengrass babble on incessantly."

"Daphne happens to be my best friend, actually; I love her company. No doubt you can't say the same, what with your... friend group being not nearly so riveting."

"Don't pretend like you know anything about my personal business, Vitelli."

"You forget that I'm friends with Theo, so yes, I unfortunately do."

"Forget?" he became suddenly a bit more animated, eyes widening and tone rising. "How could I forget when you— never mind. How much farther are these dorms?" he changed the subject, shaking his head.

I wanted to ask about what he was referring to, but I didn't bother. The less I had to interact with Malfoy was better for me.

I ignored his question and simply quickened my pace. After a short while of leading him to the dorms, we stood across from a painting of a young girl holding a basket of fruit.

"Password?" the young girl asked, causing Draco to jump back and let out a quick shriek.

"Merlin! Real children are bad enough, now I have to deal with this?" he ran his hand over his tie, straightening it out after the fright he just had.

I smacked his chest annoyedly and he yielded back, again. "You act like you've never seen a moving portrait before."

"Of course I have. She just... surprised me," he shivered.

"Sorry, honey," I apologized sweetly to the girl in the painting. "My partner here is... difficult. Could we just let the Head Girl know we're here?"

The little girl's eyes narrowed on me for a second, before lighting up happily. "Wait! I remember you! You complimented my dress once, and then my hat another time! Did you forget the password?"

I smiled and shook my head. "I remember it, I just don't think the Head Girl would like for him to know what the password to her common room is."

Draco stood with his arms crossed over his chest like a child. "I'm right here, Vitelli."

"Good," I deadpanned before looking back to the painting.

"I know I'm not supposed to break the rules, but you can come on in. It's nice to see you again!" the little girl laughed, opening the entrance.

Draco tailed me closely, almost too close for comfort. "Merlin that child is creepy. And I thought the Bloody Baron was scary..." he shivered.

"Man up, Malfoy," I almost chuckled, amused by how unnerved he was just by a little girl painting. I thanked her and she allowed us to enter.

We walked inside to see the common room of the Head Boy and Girl, which I had become most familiar with in the past week.

The common room was much smaller than a regular common room, but was decent enough with a large couch, a few chairs and tables, a fireplace, and some other functional amenities. On the left side of the room was a small doorway leading to the Head Girl suite, and on the right was a similar doorway for the Head Boy.

Draco gawked around, obviously never having stepped foot in here.

"So this is what this place looks like," he murmured, before his eyes landed on me walking over to the left doorway to find Hermione. I knocked. "A bit big just for one person, though."

I turned my head to look back at him. "It's for the both—"

"Finally, you two are here," Granger exhaled in a relieved manner and brushed past me, locking her door with some wandless magic.

As much as I didn't really like Granger, the poor thing looked so stressed. She was carrying a pile of books, her hair was frizzy and she had bags under her eyes. No doubt she had been studying the night away, in true Granger fashion, but I still felt some remorse for her.

"I'm so sorry to have to call you in at this odd time," she half-heartedly apologized while flipping through one of her books. She plopped it down on the table and began rummaging through the pages.

"Get to it, Granger. What is it you'll order us around to do?" Malfoy asked annoyedly.

She looked up at us and ran a hand through her knotty, tousled hair. "I'm really sorry... I know it's the weekend, but I need you two to run an errand for me."

As much as I dreaded that would be the case, I tried not to look like I was all that upset. She was my Head Girl, after all, and any order she gave I would have to listen to. It's why I took the job of prefect; to do these little things if needed. It didn't exactly fill me with excitement to do Granger's bidding, but if I had to then so be it.

"Slughorn has ordered in a new batch of potions books since the ones we have currently are quite dated. They've just come in at Tomes and Scrolls this morning... I would go pick them up myself, but I have other things to attend to."

"So you're just sending us off to be your delivery people? Granger, we can hire people for this sort of thing," Malfoy mused.

Granger rolled her eyes. "Yes, Malfoy. That's your job as a prefect, to do things for this school. Now if you two don't mind, I need to head off immediately for a pre-arranged meeting," she answered, frantically shoving books into her bag like she was losing time in some sort of race.

"Why can't you have the Head Boy do it? What's he up to that's so—"

"Speak of the devil, Malfoy," Cedric opened the door to his room and entered, almost as if on cue. He had a smirk playing on his lips before his eyes shifted and landed on mine. "Y/n, oh! Wasn't expecting to see you here," he briskly walked over to give me a side hug. He grinned down at me. "Was the painting excited to see you again?"

I chuckled, turning my head to avoid him seeing the blush on my face. "Yes, she was. It was so sweet, she let us in without the passw—"

"Ahem," Malfoy loudly coughed. "I'd hate to break up this touching reunion, but I think we have something to do, Vitelli."

"Since when are you so willing to take orders from your Head Girl, Malfoy?" Cedric mused, his voice laced with a ghost of a laugh.

Draco rolled his eyes. "Since I decided I want to get this over with as soon as possible. Come on, y/n," he huffed, brushing between Cedric and I to break our contact apart.

I groaned. "I'm sorry about that... Hermione, I'll make sure we bring those over to Slughorn. Cedric, I'll see you soon."

He grinned and walked me to the door, waving me off politely.

As I was bidding Cedric goodbye, I looked behind me to notice that Draco was already halfway up the corridor. Embarrassingly, I had to almost run to catch up with him.

"Malfoy! Merlin, wait!" I called out for him as I finally met up with him.

His long legs allowed for him to take long strides, ones that my shorter self simply couldn't match up with. For every step he took, I was taking two.

"You could have at least waited for me, Malfoy," I huffed, trying to catch my breath from the small sprint I just endured.

"Wait for what? Your snog-fest with Diggory to end?"

"'Snog-fest'? All we did was have a simple, human interaction. I know that's a difficult concept for you to grasp."

"You know, I was wondering why you knew where the Head dorm was, that it was for both of them, how that painting knew you... I should have figured it was because you sneak off with your lover to his private suite."

"Would you quit it with that? We're just friends, Malfoy. End of story. The sooner you stop harassing me about that, the better."

"The sooner you stop acting like a slut with that half-blooded Hufflepuff the better! Associate yourself with people of your own caliber for once!"

I pulled him back by his forearm so abruptly in the middle of his stride that I could've given him whiplash. I pulled him to me, with him slightly hunched over so that we were making serious eye contact, and although he still towered over me in height, I clearly was dominant in our mutual gaze. I must have looked furious, my eyebrows narrowed together and gaze deadly.

"What did you just call me?"

"I, uh—" he choked out, clearly surprised that I plucked up the courage to confront him about it. "I didn't call you anything," he gulped anxiously, trying to regain his composure.

"You didn't?" I deadpanned. "You called me a slut."

He shook me off of him, standing up straighter and looking like he regained some confidence. "I didn't call you a slut, I said you were acting like one."

"The implication is the same, prick," I shoved at his chest, not enough to actually hurt him, but just let him know that I was serious. He was pushed back a couple steps.

"If I thought you were a slut, I would have said so clearly. I know what one looks like, and you have been acting like one."

"Am I not allowed to speak with any males anymore?"

He crossed his arms over this chest and peered down at me, looking more domineering than he had the entire conversation. He glared at me, narrowing his grey eyes to look like a storm was brewing.

"Don't make me answer that, Vitelli. You won't like the answer."

Chapter Text

After our less than desirable encounter in the corridor, the walk over to Hogsmeade had been agonizing. It took all the restraint in my body to keep myself from clawing his eyes out. Those smug, self-serving icy gray eyes...

I tried multiple times to stay away from Malfoy as we headed over. Unfortunately, when I fell a few paces behind him, he would tease me for slowing down our assignment, prolonging it and making it take longer than necessary. When I walked quicker than him, he laughed for running away like a child. Needless to say, walking ever so close to him was not the way I wanted to spend my afternoon.

To make matters worse, Tomes and Scrolls was closed when we arrived.

"This is ridiculous," Draco slapped the sign on the door window which read that they'd be open again in two hours. Apparently, there had been some accident regarding ink processing that ruined a batch of books. I hoped that it wasn't the potions textbooks we were meant to pick up, otherwise I'd never hear the end of it. I'd somehow get blamed for it.

"What do you suppose we do for the rest of the wait time?" Draco piped up.

I, however, was still seething with Malfoy for his insult earlier that he had seemingly forgotten about. I couldn't figure how he could so blatantly call me a slut —no, "acting" like one— and go on about his normal day as if that didn't happen.

I plopped down on the bench outside of the shop. "Wait here."

"Just wait? For a whole two hours?"

"There's no point in going back to Hogwarts, we'll just have to come back."

"Sure, but there's an entire town for us to mill about," he huffed matter-of-factly.

I rolled my eyes. "Forgive me if I'm out of line, but I don't particularly want to explore Hogsmeade with someone as degenerate as you."

"Degenerate?" he feigned hurt, placing a hand over his heart. "That pains me."

"It should. Now if you'd like to entertain yourself, go ahead but leave me be."

"Come on, Vitelli. Forget about what I said back there. We both know it wasn't true," he looked down at me, prompting me to meet his gaze skeptically.

"Of course it wasn't true, but that doesn't mean you should have said it."

"I'm not going to apologize for it, but know that I don't think of you like that. It kind of just... slipped out, regrettably."

I mused by scanning him up and down. His hands were in his pockets and he kicked a rock absentmindedly with his foot, his platinum hair lightly moving about as gentle wind passed through it. His eyes were soft, not narrowed or angry like before. I didn't think he was entirely sincere, but at least he wasn't hostile.

"Do you expect me to just forget about it? Honestly, Malfoy, have you no human decency? And for me, of all people..."

His eyes bore into mine, with some sort of expression playing. It wasn't... remorse, but a ghost of it, perhaps. His features were softened, his shoulders slumped. Maybe my slight reminder of the fact we're married knocked some sense into him.

"Can we at least try to put it aside for two hours? Certainly we can go that long without maiming each other," he let out a dry chuckle to alleviate some tension.

The end of his lip tugged up in sort of a smile. Not his typical malicious smirk, but a —small, yet still present— smile. Something like it, anyway. It made him look awkward in a boyish way.

"Why would you even bother we spend time together? Wouldn't you rather we just go our separate ways and regroup in two hours?" I inquired, raising an eyebrow.

"Think of it as charity work. I'm feeling generous today," he joked in a soft way. Again, it wasn't his typical arrogant remark, but almost like he was trying to convince me.

I stood up authoritatively, pointing a finger as if I were nagging him. "Some ground rules: no insults, no snide remarks, and no offensive comments about my friends."

He held his hands up defensively, nodding slightly. "Acceptable. Is that all?"

I crossed my arms over my chest and deadpanned, "Apologize for what you called me earlier."

"Vitelli, I didn't call you anythi—"

"Apologize or I won't bother being civil with you, ever again. Trust me, Malfoy, you know I can make your life miserable in more ways than one."

He exhaled deeply and flicked his tongue against his lip. He looked unsure for a moment before returning my gaze. "Fine. I... apologize, for my uncouth behavior. You... didn't deserve it."

I breathed calmly and slightly nodded, relaxing a little. "I know I didn't."

"I already told you before that I didn't mean it. I just... didn't know how else to react."

"There were plenty of other ways to react! Better yet, you could have just not said anythi—"

"Can we just start being civil with each other like you said? I'm holding you to that same standard of decency today, you know," he cocked his head, slightly frustrated but not necessarily starting anything.

I brushed past him, bumping into his shoulder which caused him to turn around and face my way. I, however, was already making my way into the town. "Follow me, then."

My strides were pretty long, trying to keep the pace of our walk up. Internally, I must have figured that keeping my legs busy would mean that we'd have to talk less. I'd so much rather have been here with Theo, or Daphne, even Cedric; anyone but Malfoy. I just prayed that I wouldn't see anyone from school here today, otherwise someone might read more into it than there was.

Part of me felt silly. In all fairness, Draco was my husband. We were legally married, and there should be nothing wrong with spending time with your spouse out in public. The only problem was that because of my feelings toward him, I could barely stand his presence, let alone his company for an extended period of time.

I pondered about whether or not I should let this outing be a fresh start for us. No, that was nearly impossible, especially after what he just said. I know he apologized, but I couldn't forget it. Maybe this could at least be the start of us tolerating each other, if nothing else.

"I'm starved. Fancy a snack?" he inquired, actually sounding somewhat pleasant. He said it so casually, like we were old pals. I tried to brush it aside and put up with him; we made a deal, after all.

It was only then that I realized I hadn't eaten lunch yet. What with Hermione's surprise task for us, I didn't exactly have the time to go to the Great Hall for any food. I didn't want to sound so eager to share a meal with the boy, but if he was offering and we're forced to spend time together, over some food may not be the worst way to go about it.

"I suppose," I agreed blandly, following him into the Three Broomsticks.

I scanned the room quickly and felt a wave of relief wash over me when I realized I didn't know anyone inside. Still, while Draco went to order some food, I snagged a table in the far corner, just to avoid anyone seeing us if they happened to walk in.

I twiddled with my thumbs waiting for him to come back. Merlin, what was I doing? I should have just gone back to Hogwarts then came back in a couple hours. Nothing could be worse than risking the humiliation of being seen with Draco Malfoy in a potentially social setting. I tapped my foot out of anxiety. The longer it took for him to return, the more upset I was with myself for being momentarily distracted enough to agree to this outing.

"What's up with you?" his voice eventually interrupted my thoughts as he sat down. "I must say, the back corner table is a nice touch," he chuckled, sliding over a butterbeer to my side of the table. He also had a tray of some assorted pastries and desserts. They didn't quite all appeal to me, but a strawberry strudel looked appetizing.

"I didn't particularly want to be seen with you," I retorted, "but thank you for the drink."

He pushed the plate of pastries over. "Take what you like."

I reached for the strudel and took a bite, pleased with the sweet, sugary taste. It was a nice distraction from the misery I was enduring otherwise.

"Thank you, again," I forced a small smile. At least he was being tolerable. "It tastes good, actually."

A small grin tugged on his lips. "I always get this when I come here. I figured you'd like it. I mean, everyone does."

"You come to Hogsmeade often?" I mused, nibbling away at my snack.

"I used to a lot more, around third and fourth year. This year I haven't had as much time, with classes and prefect duties. It's another reason I wanted to mill about today; I haven't gotten to in a while and I missed it."

"But with me you wanted to walk around?" I asked, an eyebrow raised. It wasn't accusatory, but simply inquiring.

"There's worse company to keep," he sipped his drink. "And it just so happens that this might be a good... opportunity."

"Opportunity?"

Of course, I had an idea what he was referring to. It's been weeks since the school year started... a couple months since we've been married and we've barely discussed it. Apart from a few short times before and after the wedding, we'd largely avoided each other at all costs.

"I'm not saying we have to be best friends, trust me it's not on my agenda, but it might be... beneficial, if we tolerated each other a little more," he drawled out. Part of his tone was sarcastic, another part seemingly more genuine. I couldn't quite place whether or not I trusted his motives entirely.

"Where's this coming from? Not even a week ago you said I was barely a Slytherin after the quidditch match."

"I know, y/n, but that was right after we'd just lost—"

"You mean right after you lost."

"Sure," he grimaced, pressing his lips to a thin line. "Right after... I lost. I was throwing a fit. Poor Nott had to hear me talk his ear off," he took a swig of his drink.

"I thought you had a team meeting after the game?"

"Hmm? It was just Theo and I talking."

That's so strange. I could've sworn I remembered him saying they had a team meeting. I remember Draco coming up to us and pulling Theo away for that reason.

"Must have been mistaken," I chose not to fight him on it. "Anyway, I suppose I agree with you. It would be nice not wanting to kill you every time we patrol together," I half-heartedly chuckled.

"The feeling is mutual," he nodded, taking a bite of some other pastry. "I must admit, however, the idea wasn't mine. My father wrote to me; thinks we need to start... associating more."

I almost went into shock upon hearing that. Of course it wasn't Draco's idea, I could have figured that, but every so often I let myself forget I'm actually married. It's a wonderful moment of ignorant bliss, before realizing that I'm actually wedded to the boy sitting across from me. Hearing that his father wrote to him is a harsh reminder that I should be doing more at least to endure his presence if I don't want to be miserable the rest of my life.

"I understand," I monotonously returned.

"You have no objections to this?" he asked with an eyebrow raised, almost like he didn't believe me.

"I suppose not. It's not like it can get any worse."

He looked a little hurt by that, eyes looking down at his lap. He remained this way for a moment before looking back up with a forced small smile plastered on his face.

"Yeah, I know what you mean. But I guess I'm just relieved that you're open to it. Makes things easier."

I was pretty certain Draco had made the point he wanted to, because after that he changed the topic to something more sociable. In my opinion, it probably would have made more sense to start with the easy conversation before talking about our marriage, but he'd always worked differently than anyone else I knew.

Our chat was tolerable, anyway. I wouldn't necessarily want to have it everyday, but he proved he could hold a decent conversation without any insults.

He talked about quidditch for a while, how seeker was the only spot he ever wanted and would be bored playing anything else. We chatted about our teachers, especially how Snape clearly favors our house but we were both okay with it as long as it was to our benefit.

"Theo seems to think you're a pretty good seeker, apart from your... occasional fumbles," I toyed, messing with him over losing the last game.

"He better. I taught him everything he knows," he smirked.

"Right," I let out a dry laugh, half-amused. "I remember him saying he was considering being seeker but settled again for chaser. He could've given you a run for your money."

"Nott, seeker? No way. That's my position," he scoffed.

"I suppose they wouldn't have changed seekers after so many years, anyway. Still, he seemed bored with chaser."

"I remember he told me so. I didn't let him try out for seeker."

I cocked my head. "Really? You'd do that to your friend just to keep your spot?"

"It's not about that," he shook his head. "I want to play seeker for— other reasons. Ones that frankly don't concern you."

I sat back in my chair, slightly annoyed how his mood shifted. "Here I was thinking we'd become best friends in the past half hour," I sarcastically replied.

"We had a polite thing going here, Vitelli. Don't ruin it now."

"Then drop your attitude, you agreed to be cordial, too. Always with the short temper," I quipped.

"Like you're not being just as temperamental— fine," he exhaled deeply. "Apologies for having my little outburst."

"This is your second apology of the day, then," I smirked smugly, making him roll his eyes jokingly.

"Don't get too used to it. At least it succeeded in making you less upset with me."

"For once," I shrugged. "While we're on the subject of quidditch..."

"Go on."

"You were at the Hufflepuff party. You and Blaise."

His eyebrows arched slightly. "I... suppose we were. You comment, why?"

"I just didn't think I'd see you there. Especially after how the game ended."

"Is it so bad for a man to want to let off some steam?"

"At the party of the house that he lost to?"

He rolled his eyes. "Don't try to make sense of it. I just needed to let myself go for a bit."

"But you didn't," I shook my head. "You and Blaise were in the other room... not dancing, maybe drinking a bit, but no girls or anything. What was that?"

He stiffened in his seat a bit, looking uncomfortable. He cleared his throat.

"Didn't think you kept such tabs on me, y/n," he drawled out my first name, something I haven't heard him do before.

"I don't," I deadpanned. "I was just wondering what was going on."

"I could ask you the same thing," he quickly quipped. "Come on, let's leave."

He reached into his pocket to pull out an expensive looking, silver etched wallet with his initials embroidered on the front in green letters. It would have been quite pretty, were it not for being his. He pulled out a galleon and dropped it on the table as a tip.

Draco promptly stood up from his spot and went to pull out my chair, which was a move I was not expecting from him in the slightest. It was far too gentlemanly for him in general, but especially since he seemed so unnerved at the end of that conversation. Nonetheless, I stepped aside and he pushed my chair back in, uttering a soft "let's go" before brushing past me.

I followed him out the door, once again wondering why I chose to entertain his notions. I could have so easily just stayed in The Three Broomsticks or waited back to see if the bookshop opened up sooner than planned. Especially after his less than responsive attitude a moment ago, I felt stupid for even continuing this interaction.

All of my thoughts were moot once I realized how fast he was walking out the door and into town, and how fast I was following him.

Before I could protest to any of his quick decisions, he stumbled into some shop. Probably against my better judgment, I followed him but he was already out of my line of sight once I walked in.

Merlin, why was I even following him? He paid for my butterbeer and a snack, which was nice and all, but that doesn't mean I should be obligated to tail him like a lost puppy for the rest of the afternoon. If he really wanted my company he could have at least waited for me.

I quickly remembered that this was the same boutique that Theo and I had wandered into some time ago, looking for a present for his sister. I figured I might as well go back to the jewelry section, just to see if that necklace I liked might still be there.

My eyes scanned over the glass-covered jewelry displays. Much of the jewelry was the same, as I remembered. I saw a similar pair of earrings that Theo ended up buying and smiled to myself at the happy memory we made together.

Still, I looked all over and saw nothing of my necklace. I saw plenty; a diamond encrusted necklace, a sapphire, emerald, some more plain silver and gold ones, but not mine. It was a shame that it was gone, perhaps I would have bought it now that I had the time and was here by myself. At the same time it was nice that someone else appreciated it as much as me to buy it.

"Something caught your eye?" I heard Draco ask close to my ear from behind me, causing me to nearly jump at how surprised I was.

I craned my neck to look back, noticing he was much too close. I was almost pressed up against the jewelry display. He must have noticed my discomfort as he took a step back.

My chest heaved up and down as I returned my breathing back to normal, "Merlin, Malfoy, you scared me half to death!"

A boyish smirk played on his lips as he chuckled lowly. "Only half?"

I rolled my eyes and lightly smacked his arm, causing him to flinch jokingly. "That wasn't funny."

"Sure it was," he laughed. "Easy with the arm there, slugger. You'll actually put me half to death."

"Only half?" I mocked his play of words, causing him to scoff with that half-grin still donning his lips.

"I'm serious, y/n. See something you like?" he inquired, peering down at the displays.

"Not at all, actually."

"Ouch, that hurts," he jokingly placed his hand over his heart. I rolled my eyes when I realized he was referring to himself. "Kidding, again. Then why're you loitering over here?"

"Last time I came here there was something nice. I was just checking if it was still here, but it's gone..."

He pressed his lips to a fine line before lightly clicking his tongue. "Sorry to hear that. Should've gotten it last time, then."

"It is what it is. Just a necklace... so what did you want to come in here for?"

"Nothing, really. It was just kind of the first thing I saw..." his voice trailed. "Why don't we go to Honeydukes instead? I can buy you something you'll like."

"Thanks, Malfoy, but you just bought me food at the Three Broomsticks."

"I told you I'm feeling like doing some charity work today," he lightly chuckled. "Come on, it can be consolation for your necklace not being here."

I didn't quite like the idea of Draco buying so many things for me. Sure, they were just small snacks and it wouldn't cause him to dig into his inheritance, but it was still something that I wasn't comfortable with yet. We'd only decided to make peace today; that doesn't mean he had to buy me candies.

Nonetheless, I appreciated that it meant he was making something of an effort. I doubted he knew how to show that he was trying by doing anything other than cracking open his wallet, so I settled for making do with what attitude he was giving me.

I accepted his offer and we walked over to the candy shop. He had a basket and was throwing in one of everything, which was actually kind of funny on his part. He kept saying that he didn't know what I liked, so he should get more options to be safe. I insisted that just one chocolate frog would have been fine, but I ended up with what seemed like half the store in my bag.

I tried getting him to take at least some of them for himself, but he refused. As much as it pained me to say, Malfoy was being halfway decent; not arrogant or mischievous. That doesn't mean he made the best conversation, or was the nicest to speak to. He certainly had his witty moments in the store of near-insults, but I could look past that and try to see that he was attempting to be more tolerable.

After milling about for a short while more, we decided to finally head up to the bookshop which finally was open for business again. Luckily the line wasn't long; it shouldn't have been, after the two hour wait we just endured.

We picked up the books, each carrying about half as we magically shrunk them down as we made our way back to Hogwarts.

On the way there, I actually allowed myself to laugh at a few of the jokes he cracked. Most were at the expense of Theo, which were humorous since I knew him well.

Slughorn was in his class when we arrived, nervously tapping his foot.

"Ah, Miss Vitelli and Mr. Malfoy! Finally back with those books, I see," he sauntered over to us, helping us put down the books on the shelves he wanted.

"Apologies, Professor," I started, "there was an issue with the bookshop and our pickup was delayed."

"It's no problem, Miss Vitelli. These books won't be needed for another few days," he gave us a jolly smile.

We finished stacking them orderly and were about to bid Slughorn goodbye when he turned to look at me with a bubbly look in his eyes. "Miss Vitelli, a moment please! I trust that Mr. Diggory successfully delivered the letter to you?"

Draco, who was about to leave, turned around and shifted his focus back and forth between the two of us. "What's this about?" he interjected into the conversation.

"None of your concern, Mr. Malfoy, you are excused. Thank you for your services," Slughorn dismissively replied, gesturing toward the door.

He coughed and awkwardly shifted his weight to one side, twiddling with the ring on his right index finger. He was holding my bag of candies with his other hand.

"I was actually waiting for y/n."

He was?

I craned my neck to look at him who stood with an expression on his face that I couldn't make out. His eyebrows were tugged together and his nostrils flared, but his eyes were soft and nonthreatening.

"Oh, my bad, Mr. Malfoy. Allow me a moment," Slughorn turned his attention back to me. "Have you taken into consideration my invitation then?"

I nodded, plastering a polite smile on my face. "Yes, sir. Thank you very much for the offer, I'm sure I'll be able to make this month's dinner."

"Of course, dear," Slughorn merrily answered. "Any Vitelli is a friend of mine. Your grandfather was a great man... I look forward to getting to know you just as well. I sure hope to see you— and Mr. Diggory, of course."

"Thank you again, Professor," I returned. "I'll see you in class, then."

"Yes, yes," Slughorn smiled. "And you too, Mr. Malfoy, until the next potions class."

I looked over to see Draco, whose expression was before unreadable, now clearly unhappy. His arms were crossed over his chest and was tapping his foot, as if he was urging us to finish our conversation.

"Yes, professor, we'll be seeing you," Draco curtly replied, grabbing my arm and nearly dragging me out of the class.

"Draco, what's gotten into you?" I asked once we were outside of his room, shaking his grasp off me. I rubbed my arm where his fingers held tightly.

"Always in the way..." he murmured under his breath.

"What are you talking—"

"What was that all about?" he interrogated, his eyes narrow.

We were standing just outside the classroom, in an otherwise empty corridor. His proximity to my body was unnerving, as he towered over me in height. He'd been so calm today, and now another sudden outburst was in typical Malfoy fashion.

"He just asked about the Slug Club! I take it you weren't invited then..."

"Not that, I mean the Diggory thing. What was that about?"

"Nothing, Draco! Slughorn just asked Cedric to give me my invitation."

"Why would he ask him to do that?"

"I don't kno— why does it matter?"

He scoffed, pushing his hair out of his face. He exhaled sharply, likely trying to calm down. His relaxed posture, now not domineering over me, was somewhat slouched and his weight shifted comfortably.

"It doesn't... I— I shouldn't have reacted like that."

"Then why did you?"

He breathed deeply. "I... Excuse me, y/n," he shoved the bag of candies into my hand and walked away swiftly, his long legs leading him quickly toward the other end of the corridor.

And I stood there dumbfounded, with a lost puppy look on my face once again.

Chapter Text

Cara y/n,

Your presence will be required at our ball this weekend celebrating the anniversary of our family arriving in England. I have cleared your absence with the Headmaster and a ticket will be waiting at the train station at your earliest convenience. We expect to see you no later than tomorrow morning.

Tutto il nostro amore,

Mamma + Papá

I groaned and crumpled up the letter, throwing it on the ground in front of me. I didn't forget that the ball was this weekend (how could I when they make the biggest deal out of it every year?), but I had blissfully failed to remember that I was needed at home.

I used to love this ball when I was younger, but it was simply because I didn't know any better. It was fun being a child and just prancing around, meeting my cousins if they were there, playing with the children of family friends who came. When I got older and I was forced to adhere to formal rules, it was much less enjoyable.

I didn't bother packing a bag; there was no need if I was going home. I simply took a quick break to tell Daphne and Theo where I'd be, along with stopping by the Head Girl and Boy dorms to let them know of my absence. To my disappointment, Cedric wasn't there and I was forced to tell Granger instead.

After grabbing some food from the kitchens, I headed to the station and boarded the earliest train I could. It was fairly empty but still had some people; there were always some teachers coming or going for whatever reason. I noticed a few that I briefly said hello to before trying to find a decent compartment.

I headed for the compartment that Daphne and I usually shared when we boarded for Hogwarts. It was the farthest down, with the intention of not being bothered. Without thinking, I slid open the door and stepped inside before noticing it was occupied.

"Malfoy?"

"Mm, hello, y/n," he murmured. How had I not noticed him in here? More importantly what was he doing here?

"Sorry, didn't mean to interrupt... I was just looking for a place to sit," I awkwardly shifted my weight to one side.

He motioned to the empty seat across from him. "You could join me. Might make the ride less quiet."

I looked hesitantly between the door and the empty seat, not knowing if I'd want to entertain the notion of being in his company.

Draco and I hadn't necessarily resolved our tensions entirely, but being around him was wholly more tolerable since our forced Hogsmeade trip some time ago. Combined with our patrols, his presence was more familiar. That wasn't to say I necessarily enjoyed it, but it was increasingly less difficult to be around him.

I decided to swallow my pride and sit with him. I eased into the seat and looked out the window. The train was starting; I could feel the vibrations of the engine.

"What brings you away from Hogwarts?" I mused.

"Same reason as you," he shrugged. "Your ball."

My eyebrows knitted together in confusion. "You're coming to the ball?"

"My parents sent me a letter saying I was required to attend. It's not like it was my choice."

"So they call, you run?"

"You're doing the same, aren't you?"

"It's my family's party," I sunk into my seat, avoiding his gaze.

"Then I suppose it's mine, too."

My eyes shifted to briefly meet his. They were icy, like usual, but a more subdued gray. It was almost like he was trying to hint at our arrangement without actually saying the words; it was a physically knowing sentiment which I understood immediately.

I didn't feel comfortable saying anything else. We sat in silence the rest of the way, the only sounds coming from the train or the rustling of the books we were reading. I could barely concentrate, though. I pretended to read; my fingers turning a page every two minutes or so to look like I was. My mind was elsewhere... thinking about how Draco was so accepting of his entrance to my family.

When our ride finished, he let me step out first and he followed. To our surprise, my parents had arranged for a carriage to take us to my family manor.

I knew Draco had been here before. Many times, actually. For one reason or another, it seemed like I was always at his home or he was at mine, but this was different. This was the first time since our wedding that he had been here. It felt different; in some ways, he had a claim to my home, as much as I had a claim to his.

We were ushered in by my house elves who were excited to see me, as I was to see them. I knew my parents treated them with respect but didn't quite have the same friendship that I did with most of them. Draco sneered when one younger house elf came up to hug my leg affectionately.

"You let your house elves be so... touchy?" he gibed.

"They just miss me, Malfoy," I told him lowly once they had scurried off, likely to prepare our rooms.

"It's strange seeing that type of relationship with your servants," he shook his head.

"They do take care of us, after all. Now quit your whining, let's meet my parents. I doubt yours will be far off," I rolled my eyes, heading for the drawing room where we spent most of our time when guests appeared.

He followed close behind me, gawking a bit at the portraits or decorations we had aligning the hallways. In the drawing room, as I suspected, were my parents along with Draco's.

"There's my little girl," my mom rushed over to me, hugging me tightly. Her and I had a rocky relationship since the wedding, but I could tell she was trying to make amends. Those amends would never be enough, but she was certainly making an effort which I could at the very least appreciate.

Narcissa followed suit, hurrying to Draco and giving him a kiss on either cheek. I noticed that he blushed slightly when she acted so affectionate with her son. She gave me a hug as well, which I was pleased to take part in. She was always a sweet woman.

They ushered us to the table where our fathers were sat; I greeted both of them politely while Draco shook their hands.

There was some idle banter to begin with, the formalities of hoping our studies were going well, succeeding in our extracurriculars, the likes. I hated that type of chat; it was necessary, but tiresome. House elves brought in some refreshments to ease the mood a little.

"The ball will be Saturday, as per usual," my mother informed us, sipping her coffee. "I've already made all the arrangements, the ballroom should be finished decorating by this evening and the drawing room as well as a few others will be handled tomorrow. I have the elves and some other hands working on it presently."

"You already planned everything?" I inquired. "We always did that together..."

"Did you still want to help? Apologies, y/n, I just figured you'd prefer staying out of it in light of... recent developments," she referenced my marriage.

As much as she was right, I would have still liked to help plan the ball. When I was younger, my mom would let me pick the color scheme of the night and where some little decorations went. As I got older, I was granted more creative freedom as I understood style and structure better.

Part of me was looking forward to doing that again this year, but I supposed that made sense why she hadn't requested me home sooner. Saturday was only two days away, after all.

"It's fine," I assured her. "Perhaps next time, then."

She beamed with a bright smile. "Perfect, honey. Now, there was one other thing I needed to attend to... a matter of your first appearance together. Not including the wedding, of course."

"Alright?" my eyes narrowed.

"I trust you both have your rings with you?" she asked, eyes gazing down to first my left hand, ringless, then his, the same.

"You're not going to make us wear them, are you?" I rolled my eyes.

"I'm sorry if you don't want to, y/n, but it's time you both start making a commitment to this arrangement! At least start by wearing your wedding rings. This shouldn't be controversial."

Becoming increasingly frustrated, I so badly wanted to yell and say that of course it's controversial, I was forced into this marriage. However, I knew that would only land me in trouble and I decided against it. Instead I opted to reply blankly.

"My ring is at Hogwarts. I didn't know I'd need it."

My mother sighed. "I'll send for someone to get it, then. It'll be back tomorrow, likely. And you, Draco?" she looked over at him who looked nervous, wrinkles in his forehead as a result of scrunching his eyebrows together.

"I'll wear it," he nodded.

"Is yours at Hogwarts, too? I can have them pick it up too—"

"Don't worry. I'll... have it for tomorrow."

My mother thanked him for his cooperation then turned back to look at me. "I'm sorry, sweetheart. I should have told you in the letter to bring it. But you should still be getting used to wearing it."

I shook my head, sighing audibly. "It's alright, mamma. I think I'm just going to head up to my room..."

"Oh, y/n, I've had some of your things moved to the second master bedroom on the fourth floor. A house elf will show it to you if needed," my mother sipped her coffee casually, as if nothing happened.

"What? Why did you—"

"It's only couth for a married couple to stay together."

I looked over to gauge Draco's reaction, but his focus was on the teacup in front of him. He was clearly avoiding eye contact.

"B-but what about my room?" I stammered.

"Yours is still your own," my mother assured me. "But while the two of you are both here, you might as well share a room."

"But mamma! I don't want—"

"Y/n, there's no scandal. You two are married. It's completely acceptable."

My father stared me down from the other end of the table. "This isn't up for discussion, y/n. If you want to stay in your own room, you may do so when your husband isn't here. Draco's parents have already taken the liberty of bringing some of his things there, as well."

I could not believe what was going on; why were they so forceful about this?

Sure, we were married, legally. I suppose there was no scandal, like my mother insisted. There wouldn't be anything morally objectionable or concerning about it... under normal circumstances. I had avoided sharing a room with him at Hogwarts, but I didn't consider how different married life would be at home.

I may have warmed up to him somewhat in the past couple weeks, but that didn't mean I was suddenly ready to share a room with him.

I supposed if it was the second master suite, at least it would be large enough that maybe we wouldn't even touch. I could work something out to make it more bearable.

"Fine," I huffed. "I'll be up there if you need me..."

Before I could make my way out of the room, my father called out.

"Take Draco with you."

I craned my neck to look back at Draco who was wordlessly scooting his chair back and cautiously walking over to where I was. His eyes were down, avoiding eye contact again. By the time he made his way over to me, his back was hunched a bit so that he was slouching, his neck almost strained looking down.

He looked like a coward.

Once Draco was just a few steps behind me, I walked into the hallway and made my way down. Granted, it was a long hallway to where the stairs were and it would still be a few minutes walk, but I was eager to get a move on, without him.

We walked like this, him some paces behind, all the way up to the fourth floor. I knew exactly which room my parents were talking about, so it was no difficult task for me to find it. I always assumed this room would just be vacant; I didn't expect for my spouse and I to ever occupy it.

Without even looking back at him, I slammed the door open and let it bang against the wall on the opposite wall inside the room. I noticed Draco flinch. "What'd this door do to you?"

I rolled my eyes and glanced around the room. It was giant, of course. The colors were light, but sophisticated, mostly white and beiges with accents of red as a color scheme. It was a beautiful room, but what it represented was the opposite of what I wanted.

I sauntered over to the large, walk-in closet and noticed many of my clothes were already in here, as well as some of Draco's on the opposite end. In fact, most of the room was personalized to my likes. The bookshelf on the far corner was stocked with my favorites, the table had a coffee set on it (knowing I didn't drink tea), the loveseats were a soft red as I preferred.

I figured this was mostly since Draco didn't have input to the design; otherwise I could only imagine black and dark green. I didn't mind that color scheme at school, but it would be depressing to look at it every day. It was too doom and gloom.

When my eyes landed back on the bed, I noticed Draco laying down, looking up at the top veil of the canopy bed. It was larger than I would've expected, custom made for the most expansive size possible. The sheets were white, with a light red bedspread and thin, red curtains hanging from the top. His face was expressionless, just staring up.

"I see you've made yourself comfortable," I breathed out, rounding around the bed to the loveseat on the opposite side. I sat down and pulled my legs to the side so I was partially laying down on it.

"Might as well if I'm staying here for the weekend," he shrugged.

"Don't you find this... strange at all?"

"Not really," he sat up to look at me. His legs were spread far from each other, his forearms resting on the bed behind him. He looked tall, with his arms and legs elongated. "It was only a matter of time."

I supposed he was right. After we finished Hogwarts, we'd be forced to live together, likely not in either family's manor but our own somewhere in the countryside. At least then, I might have my own room. For the time being, I had to share with him.

"I think we should lay some ground rules," I deadpanned.

"Your call. This is your home, after all."

"Good. I think we should consider these next few nights as just being roommates, and nothing more."

He cocked his head to the side, revealing his long, pale neck. It was almost swan-like. "Elaborate on that."

"You stay on your side of the bed, I stay on mine. Don't go through my clothes in the closet, I won't go through yours. And definitely, no touching."

He breathed in deeply and clicked his tongue against his teeth before slowly nodding.

"As you wish."

Chapter Text

The first night at home was as tolerable as could be.

After we settled in, our group didn't interact much. I spent most of my time with my cat, actually, who I left behind instead of bringing to Hogwarts because of his age. Poor thing was too old to come with me to school, so I just settled for keeping Dante home.

As quickly as possible, I left mine and Draco's joint room and headed for the library where I spent time reading with Dante at my side. It was quite relaxing, and I spent the whole evening until dinner with him. We played a little bit, but the poor old cat would rather lay in my lap for most of the time.

Upon being called to dinner, I was somewhat apprehensive that I'd be forced into more arrangements as per my parents orders, but I was satisfied when we simply had a polite and cordial meal without anymore tasks. Apart from a dress fitting my mother assigned for me the next day, it was a tolerable dinner without any major issues.

After dinner I retreated to the library again to pass time, before being faced with the reality of the matter that I'd have to share a bed with Draco.

I made sure to dress in something comfortable, just an oversized shirt and shorts that weren't revealing, seeing as I wasn't anywhere near ready to dress in a way that would be suggestive around him. He seemed to reciprocate the notion, as he wore some sweatpants and a black a-style shirt.

When I slipped into bed, Draco was already asleep. It was evident by the soft snores that came from his lips. He was far to the left side of the bed, despite the fact that it was huge and he could have slept way closer to the middle with no risk of us touching. He was laying on his stomach, with his arms under his pillow and his platinum hair scattered across the silky pillowcase. He looked... peaceful, actually. Nonthreatening. Tolerable.

I took my place to the right side of the bed, capitalizing on the fact he slept so close to the edge so that left more room for me wherever I wanted.

When I woke up, he was already gone. I didn't figure him for an early bird, but it was entirely possible he was just trying to avoid the awkwardness of us sharing the bed. It was more likely than not.

My first (and only, really) task of the day was my dress fitting. I made sure to do it straight away, so I could spend the rest of the day relaxing as I wanted without any distractions.

Soon after I awoke and did my morning routine, I headed down to the wardrobe room in our manor which we typically reserved for occasions like this. Some of our memorable outfits were there for show, as well, such as wedding dresses and various gowns worn at different balls or galas.

I heard some chatting from outside, assuming that the tailor was already there, probably working with my mother. I stepped inside to see not my mother, but Draco being fitted. He was stood up on a small podium for the tailor to better assess his needs. He was dressed in a black velvet tuxedo with a shorter neckline and appropriately sized bowtie. Not quite the outfit I was expecting, but I assumed he had no choice in the matter.

"Ah, Signora Malfoy!"

My head turned to notice the tailor rushing over to me, engulfing me in a hug. I'd probably recognized him from somewhere before, I wouldn't be surprised if he managed one of our other fittings before.

I wasn't used to being referred to as Mrs. Malfoy or anything connoting my marriage to Draco, but there was no point in correcting him about "Vitelli". Not here, anyway. Plus, I legally was y/n Malfoy, so he wasn't exactly incorrect in his wording.

"Please go into the second room next door to meet for your fitting... hai un vestito molto bello!" his thick Italian accent came out when he spoke about my dress.

I nodded politely and thanked him, but before I could head off, he grabbed my arm and pushed me closer to Draco who I only now noticed was pink in the face. He was tugging at the sleeves of his tuxedo in a nervous fashion, constantly preening himself.

The tailor smiled wide. "You have one handsome husband, no?"

The redness on Draco's cheeks turned a darker shade of pink, almost tinting red. He turned to look at us and waved his hand dismissively. "That's quite alright, Francesco, let her go to her fitting."

"Ah, of course, Signor Malfoy... I should be finishing these threads..." the tailor's voice trailed off, leaving me somewhat frazzled. I stood there frozen a moment before following his first instruction of heading into the other room.

There I was met with another tailor, I could only assume, but this one, a woman who was touching at what I figured was my dress for the ball.

She turned to look at me and smiled, "Buon giorno, Signora Malfoy," she pulled me in for a hug. Only today was I being referred to by my married name, but it was already bothering me. However, she was nice enough... very giddy.

After some short banter between the two of us, it felt like my clothes were being pulled off me instantaneously in a frantic fashion as the dress replaced what I wore a moment ago. I had been to plenty of balls and was very used to these fittings, and I was never that fond of them. I liked my dresses, but the whole fitting process was tedious.

Still, I had to admit the dress was nice. I didn't expect anything less, but at least it wouldn't be torturous.

It was long enough to drag a bit on the floor, assuming that it would be a perfect touch once I wore heels. It was fitted at the top, but flaring out past my waist and being provided some shape from the thick petticoat underneath. However, the part I was drawn most to were the lacy sleeves that lightly continued to my chest, stopping at my collarbone. Since the whole dress was black, the lace sleeves allowed for my skin tone to peek through and provide some different shading. It was modest, and I liked the elegance of it.

"Once I make some minor alterations, it'll be perfect for you, Signora," Chiara, my tailoress, smiled at me, pinning together some of the bunched up dress at the bottom.

"Thank you," I plastered a grin, "it's beautiful already. I'm sure any changes you make will be wonderful."

"Don't worry at all, I'll have these finished by this afternoon. I may call you in for a final fitting this evening or tomorrow morning, if necessary..." she pinned a few more pieces of fabric.

I furrowed my eyebrows. "Is this it?"

How could we be done already? This fitting took no more than ten minutes.

She smiled, pleased with herself. "I spoke to your mother about your preferences. I didn't want to waste your time, darling. I'm sure you have enough to deal with, what with the ball so soon."

"That was kind of you... thank you, again."

"Of course, Signora. Now, step out of that dress and go on about your day, you don't want to be cooped up in the fitting room all morning would you?" she joked. "I'll have a pick of matching jewelry and shoes ready for you tomorrow. Your choice."

Happy with how quickly the appointment went, I slid out of the dress and pulled on my day clothes again, before bidding Chiara goodbye then heading to eat breakfast. I wasn't overly hungry, but I tried to at least have some coffee and a few biscotti for a kick of energy.

Deciding to continue my reading from the previous night, I put my biscotti onto the small tray of my cup and brought it into the library. With my breakfast in hand, I looked around for the book on one of the shelves I thought I left it on. I was almost done with it, which meant I could start on the sequel and I was eager to do so.

I thought I'd left it on the nearest shelf, but it took a little more finding than I thought. I roamed up and down the shelves trying to find it, even tempted to just Accio it, but that might risk knocking down some other books if it was stacked.

Perhaps I'd left it on the chair where I sat the night before?

I turned a corner toward the armchair next to the fireplace where I spent almost the whole day before. Instead of finding my book, however, I saw Draco.

"Draco... hello," I awkwardly greeted.

"Y/n," he replied. "Satisfied with your fitting?"

"The dress... I like it. Quite a bit, actually. And yours?"

He shrugged. "Tuxedos are not my preferred taste. There's no flexibility with tie choice. Still, it was fine, I suppose."

I took the opportunity to scan his figure. He was hunched over on the chair, his forearms resting on his legs. On the coffee table in front of him was a game board. It wasn't chess, although it sort of looked like it at first. The board was longer, but less wide, and it seemed like there were only two types of pieces.

I bobbed my head in the direction of the board. "What's that you're playing?"

He lightly shook his head, breathing deeply. "Just some game."

"By yourself?"

He pressed his lips to a thin line. "I haven't got anyone else to play with."

He waved his hand and a piece moved magically. He must have enchanted the board to play against him.

Part of me almost felt sorry for him. I was essentially throwing myself a pity party, and instead Draco was here playing a game against himself, he was so lonely.

I sat down at the armchair across from his, the coffee table between us. I set my espresso and biscotti down next to the board.

"Care for a partner?"

He raised an eyebrow. "You play Senet?"

"Never heard of it, actually. You could go back to playing against the board..."

"Point taken," he cut me off, lightly laughing. "I could teach you, if you'd like."

In that moment, somewhat out of pity for Draco and somewhat out of my own loneliness, I chose to forget about whatever book I was going to read and accepted his offer. There were worst ways to spend a day, I supposed. Playing a game could be enjoyable, if I let it be.

I scanned the board again. Now closer, I noticed it was a three by ten board, and I was correct, there were only two types of pieces. One was short and white, and the other was tall and black.

"Pawns versus kings?" I inquired.

"Humans versus gods."

I picked up a black piece, presumably the god, and twirled it around my fingers for a moment, inspecting it. It was much grander than the short, stout white human piece.

"What is this game, anyway?"

He leaned back in the chair, his light hair messily draping over his forehead. He looked more relaxed than he had a minute ago. He was slouched comfortably, his hands laying on the top of his legs.

"It's been extinct for... a few thousand years, at this point. Senet is an ancient Egyptian board game that supposedly symbolizes the crossing of a mortal spirit into the afterlife."

I held up the piece in my hand. "But first they have to get past the gods to get to paradise."

His lip turned up in a smirk. "You catch on quick."

"It sounds like Hounds and Jackals."

His eyes widened. "You... you've played Hounds and Jackals?"

I leaned back in my seat with a smirk playing on my lips. "Maybe once or twice."

"You're smarter than you look, y/n," he returned my smirk.

He reached down to the board and held up a black piece in his left hand and a white piece in his right. "Prefer to be a human, or a god?"

———

I decided to be nice and let him win the first few rounds before absolutely destroying him in the rest of the games. Once he explained the rules, which were fairly easy to grasp, I figured I was probably better than he was. We even switched roles as humans and gods just to make it fair.

On what seemed like our dozenth round of Senet, we'd both gotten much more comfortable, ditching our chairs and sitting cross-legged on the ground to be closer to the board.

He'd ran his hand through his hair so many times it was tousled and scattered, with the front sprawled out on his forehead and the rest messily pushed to the side. His eyes were narrowed as he stared at the board, contemplating his next move.

"Careful, Draco. One wrong move and my god's got your mortal for company," I teased, knowing he was eerily close to losing again.

"Oh, hush. I've only got a few squares left till I pass to the afterlife."

He picked up the "Senet sticks" as we'd been calling them, which were used for our dice to determine how many moves could be made. He lightly tossed them in the air, and they fell on the table.

I grimaced jokingly, as he'd been given some terrible luck. "Sorry, Draco. Looks like you're not headed for paradise," I took his final mortal and placed it on my end of the table.

He rolled his eyes and jokingly knocked over the pieces remaining on the board.

"For someone who supposedly only learned this game this morning, you're good at this, y/n."

"I'm a woman of many talents," I smirked tauntingly, holding up his human piece in my hand.

"And surprises, clearly. Let's play Hounds and Jackals now," he suggested. "Maybe I can beat you at that..."

I raised an eyebrow. "Draco it's nearly two, don't you want to have lunch?"

"That might be a good idea. Can't we just call in a house elf to bring something?"

"We could, but I also want to see how the decorations are coming along in the ballroom. I was planning on passing by on the way."

"Oh, I see. Well, let's make a stop there then. I could do with stretching my legs."

With Draco following close behind, we walked down the hall to the ballroom which was bustling with workers inside tending to their matters. I quickly realized it was a black and white ball, which explained why my dress was all black with no other colors, as well as Draco's tuxedo rather than a suit where there could be clashing with tie or handkerchief colors.

"How elegant," Draco noted behind me. I didn't even take into consideration just how close he was, almost near my ear. I was too focused on the room to notice.

"It looks nice. Same as every other year, really. Except for the black and white theme."

"It's classy... neat. I like black and white."

"I suppose. It's much better than the cream yellow shade we had two years ago, everything looked like a not-yet ripe banana," I shivered.

He lightly chuckled. "I remember that ball. You almost tripped down the stairs when your family made your entrance. But your dress was quite pretty."

"You were there?" I turned my head to look at him quizzically.

"You... don't remember?"

I shook my head. "I don't, actually."

What was I doing that night? Two years ago? Oh. That was soon after Cedric and I had just started dating. I had snuck him into the ball and we spent the night in the garden together. It monopolized most of my night.

"Oh," he looked down, before coughing. "We spoke that night."

I noticed the tugging of his eyebrows together, what I was beginning to understand was one of his many ticks that he was unhappy or uncomfortable. I tried to diffuse the tension.

"Why don't we go check the drawing room? They must be done with the decorations there."

He looked back to meet my eyes and his features softened. He nodded and followed my lead.

The drawing room was decorated quite similarly to the ballroom. All of the colored furniture had been replaced with black and white versions, which looked more comfortable than the things we normally had. I was pleased with the change.

After a quick assessment of the room, my rumbling stomach indicated we should stop for lunch.

"Come on, I'll find a house elf to make something," Draco offered, bobbing his head toward the dining room.

"No, it's fine," I shook my head. "Let's just go to the kitchen. I can make something."

His eyes widened, along with his raised eyebrows. "You cook?"

"Don't you?"

He brought his hand to the back of his neck. "I've, uh... never had to."

"Neither have I, but it's still good to know how," I started walking toward the kitchen, Draco trailing behind me.

"I'm afraid I won't be much help, then. I don't know—"

"Don't worry, Draco. I'll take care of you."

Draco kept insisting that I was doing too much work, and that he could just pick something light without me having to make a fuss. Instead, we settled on a compromise: I wouldn't cook him anything, but I'd make an antipasto platter for us instead.

I could tell he hadn't really been exposed to a lot of Italian foods, despite the fact he'd spent so much time around my family in his life. I had to explain to him what everything was, and he was so hesitant to try anything, despite it being essentially a glorified snack platter. A delicious one, but it took maybe five minutes to put together and a few more to slice the meats and cheeses.

"Could I have a sip of your coffee?" he asked, in between bites of his food.

"You drink espresso?" I raised an eyebrow.

"I don't. Never have, actually. But I'd like to try it."

"It's a lot stronger than tea, you know?"

He shrugged. "I can manage."

"Suit yourself," I carefully slid the cup over to him.

He cautiously picked it up, still being a little hot and he took a gentle sip. He pulled away and a dark drop of espresso still clung to the middle of his lips. He licked it promptly.

"Your verdict?" I asked.

He took another sip before lowering the cup and raising his lip into a smirk. "I think you'll have to pour another one for yourself since I'm finishing this."

A smile took its place on my face as I walked over to the pot and poured myself another. I looked over and saw him fascinated by the little cup.

"This going to be replacing your chamomile each morning?"

"Maybe in the afternoons when I need a pick-me-up," he chuckled.

"That works, too. You could always try it with—"

"Y/n, Draco!" my mother rushed into the kitchen, interrupting our actually upbeat banter.

"Hello, mamma," I blandly greeted as she pulled me into a hug then doing the same to Draco. She'd basically killed my mood.

"Where have you two been all day? Have you done your fittings?"

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, mamma. First thing this morning. We've just been in the library since playing some games."

She looked surprised, her eyebrows raising. "I love to hear that, y/n, it's about time you two got along. See? Sleeping in the same room works wonders for a man and wife—"

"Mamma!" I interrupted her, not wanting to know what she could have been insinuating in the slightest.

"Right," she laughed. "Even so, nice to see you kids together. Anyhow, y/n, I have your ring."

She pulled a small ring box out of her purse which I quickly noticed was the holder for it I kept back at Hogwarts. She must have just gotten it back from whoever she sent to get it.

"Make sure you have it on for the ball tomorrow. It's your first appearance together—"

"I know, I know," I scoffed. I shoved the box into my pocket, not wanting to see it right now.

"Draco? You have yours?" my mother turned to look at him, who now had a light pink blush tinting his cheeks.

"Oh, uh, yes. I... I'll wear it tomorrow."

Chapter Text

The hour of the ball came much sooner than I would've liked. Given, I did take the opportunity to sleep in longer than usual. Most of my family's balls would last through the night and typically well into the morning; I tried to give myself time to rest beforehand.

Draco and I awoke on opposite sides of the bed and chatted through most of the morning. Since our game day yesterday morning through afternoon, then accompanied by more games as well as reading together during the evening, he was quite tolerable. More than tolerable, actually. I would even go so far as to say I appreciated his company during this otherwise lonely visit at home.

He was utterly pleasant (apart from being a little upset when I beat him at one of our many games we played) and had some humor to him. Time and time again I found myself laughing at his remarks or quick-witted comments.

In the morning especially, his mind was slower as we were both waking up and he let out a few more entertaining, uncouth remarks which I found quite funny. It alleviated any awkwardness of us being together; it was almost just like we were comfortable roommates cramped together in the same bed.

For someone who slept soundly all night, he woke up looking rather decent. His hair was messy but not overly disheveled, and his sweatpants and shirt that he wore to bed made him look relaxed and comfortable. Most of the morning, he had a lopsided grin on his face that was more boyish than I was used to seeing.

After some stalling between the two of us, we were forced to get up, eat, then promptly get ready for the ball (separately). We headed to the wardrobe room from the morning prior where we were fitted for our clothes and found our things. Seeing as I also had makeup and hair to attend to, my tailor had brought along another stylist to help me with my appearance.

The process of getting ready altogether took a few hours. In some part, it was nice feeling pampered and looking elegant, but it was dreadful sitting almost statue still for nearly four hours.

I made sure to inspect myself well in the wardrobe's many mirrors. Although I saw it on myself yesterday, everything looked so much more beautiful when my entire outfit was together. The hair, makeup, dress, shoes, accessories. Even my wedding ring, which my mother forced me to wear on this specific occasion. When put together with everything else, I tolerated the sight of it.

My father had insisted we have a rehearsal walk down the staircase, just to practice before our family made our entrance at the right hour. However, I opted out, seeing as my wardrobe took the longest and I had done this so many times before that it was almost like second nature. My mother simply reminded me of what to do and when; I committed it to memory.

Most guests piled in around seven to eight to eight-thirty, but our entrance wasn't expected until later. Luckily, a vast majority of the guests would be blood-related family or very close family friends, so I wouldn't risk seeing the likes of anyone from school. If anything, maybe it would be their parents, but still. Most of the guests were from back home in Italy, and the rest were still purebloods from Britain.

Atop the grand staircase that led down to the ballroom, I started to feel some jitters just before we were expected to make our entrance. I had done this plenty of times, but there was something nerve-wracking about walking with your parents, showboating their offspring, to a large group of your extended family and then some. I remembered my mother told me a couple hundred would be in appearance tonight.

The band hired to entertain started their song that indicated our entrance and my mother forced me with her and my father to the top of the staircase. I plastered on a fake smile that seemed genuine enough to show that I might've enjoyed being there.

My mind was blank, essentially. The lights were too bright and there were too many people to make anything out, but the sounds of family members spewing out graces of welcome with light clapping were enough to force myself to be reminded of the fact this was happening.

My parents were on my right, my mother clinging to my father's arm as they both waved with their free hands to various guests. On the far left of them, I was with my left hand on the marbled hand railing and my right hand mimicking their actions of waving on our descent down.

I was just happy I didn't trip.

Upon reaching the bottom of the staircase, I'd assumed that I would step aside and allow my parents to have the first official dance while I watched on, like I always had in years past.

I forgot one important piece of information: I was married.

When my feet hit the floor of the ballroom, my fingertips left the handrailing to be met by the arm of Draco Malfoy who was already ushering me in the direction of where my parents were headed: the middle of the ballroom.

Merlin, were we supposed to dance?

I was aware of the fact that we both knew this dance simply by virtue of going to many balls for family functions, but it was worrisome that we didn't even practice beforehand.

"We should have rehearsed this," I mumbled under my breath as we took our positions, some distance away from my parents.

"We'll be fine," he whispered, one arm snaking around my waist and the other gently grasping my hand. His eyes narrowed and he had a serious look on his face, like he was concentrating. "Just follow my lead."

As the music began and the dance started, I was utterly surprised by how graceful he was. His long legs allowed for him to sweep across the floor in a gentlemanly way, like he had practice at this. The heels I was wearing allowed for me to be at least somewhat closer to his height, which allowed for a more even range of motion between the two of us.

The song continued for just a short while. A few steps, a twirl, some slightly fancier moves, but the only consolation I was happy about was that I was sure most of the focus was on my parents and not Draco and I. Still, it must have been a sight to watch.

I was so engrossed by the dance and my concentration in order to avoid being utterly humiliated that I didn't even take in the time to appreciate how decent he looked.

Once we finished the thankfully short opening dance and said a few quick greetings to closer family members, I took the opportunity to drink in his appearance.

The black tuxedo he was wearing made him look sleek and put-together. I was so used to seeing him wear either school robes or his typical Malfoy black suit that a tuxedo was actually a nice change of pace. It was much more charming than I would've figured. While his typical black suit was more intimidating, this was the opposite: inviting, endearing.

He looked taller than usual, especially his legs which seemed to jut out when he shifted his weight to one side. His shoulders seemed broader, and arms longer when they were shoved into the pockets of his slacks.

Had he gotten taller? No, not since yesterday...

His hair was parted on the right side, not necessarily slicked back like he had when he was younger, but certainly styled with either spray or a light gel that kept it in place as we danced. It was his most noticeable feature, after all, and it looked quite appealing. It didn't have that certain allure that would make you want to run your fingers through it, but it was nice to look at.

"Going to keep staring the whole night?" Draco asked, pulling me out of my trance.

I lightly shook my head, a blush creeping up my neck. A smirk tugged on his lips.

"I was only kidding, y/n," he chuckled. "You know, considering we didn't even have a practice, you're a pretty good dancer."

I tucked a piece of hair behind my ear, giving him a small smile. "You, too. I'm sorry about that, I completely forgot about the dance."

"There was nothing to forget."

I looked at him quizzically. "Weren't we supposed to do that?"

"Your parents danced together, and so I figured we should too. Call it a surprise."

Were we not expected to? Did he just initiate the dance himself?

Before I could open my mouth to ask what he meant by that, I was being swarmed by a group of family members who had rushed over to where Draco and I were standing.

There was a giant group of hugs, kisses on the cheek, lots of speaking in my native Italian language (which I actually hadn't spoken for a long time and I was quite rusty). However, the one word I did pick up on over and over again was "marito"... husband.

Due to the nature of the arranged marriage and the desire for it to be mostly secret until later when we were both ready, I insisted that my parents not invite more than our closest relatives. However, my whole family still knew about the marriage and were dying to meet him.

Poor Draco was swarmed by cousins, aunts, uncles, Merlin knows who else and bombarding him with questions.

Of course, they all knew about the legacy of the Malfoy family and had no objections to his status, but that didn't stop my very passionate (for lack of a better term) family from wanting to get to know him.

I looked at Draco pleadingly, as if to offer up a silent apology, which he returned with a smirk.

To my surprise, he actually fit in with my family all too well. If there was one skill he mastered at a young age, it was charm. His allure was just right when he wanted it to be. Just a few chat up lines for my female cousins, calling my aunts the right compliments, name dropping the correct politicians for my uncles; they all seemed to accept him right away.

It was almost remarkable how he could flip a switch when he wanted to. Why couldn't he act so appealing at school? Why only here did he make an effort to be liked?

After all too long of this interrogation (and somehow, acceptance) of Draco, I made sure to finally step in and grab him by the arm and steal him away from the chaos of it all.

"Your family," he lightly chuckled. "They're... eccentric, to say the least."

"I'm sorry," I laughed. "I should have prepared you for that swarming. Must've felt like a celebrity."

"Just another day at the office then," he smirked. "Still, they all seemed rather... welcoming."

"I don't know how, but you somehow charmed them like you do everyone else."

"Everyone?" he raised an eyebrow.

I smirked. "Well, mostly everyone."

He chuckled again, lightly shaking his head. "Shall we go say hello to my parents? I reckon they've been dying to see us since you stepped down."

"We can see mine as well. Let's stop by yours first, though."

I scanned the room looking for any trace of striking blonde hair, but Draco instead slipped his fingers through mine and led me through a large mass of people on the ballroom floor. I was somewhat stunned by this, not expecting that gesture, but I figured it must have been simply the easiest way to guide me through the room.

His touch was cold, but nonthreatening. There was something almost mysterious about it; it was somehow a calming type of chill that ran up my wrist to my forearm.

"Ah, Draco," Lucius smiled as we approached the Malfoy couple on the opposite side of the room. "Quite a good performance, son."

As we neared closer, I felt the cold touch of his fingers leave mine as we stood across from his folks. For a fleeting moment, a split second, I might have missed the contact. That feeling disappeared when the greetings started.

Narcissa pulled me in for a hug and Lucius gave me a gentlemanly kiss on my left hand. He took the opportunity to inspect the engagement and wedding ring on my finger, which I donned for the first time since our wedding day.

"I must admit, y/n, this looks ever the more radiant on you than it did on my mother," Lucius attempted to lightly laugh, looking at the large emerald stone centered in the silver ring. It was the only bit of color in my entire outfit.

I turned to look at Draco. "This was your grandmother's?"

His eyes reflected a hint of worry, perhaps nervousness, before I heard Lucius scoff.

"You haven't told her this is a Malfoy heirloom? Some lousy husband you are, Draco."

"Lucius, that's enough," Narcissa gritted, before turning to look at us with a smile. "Yes, dear. This was Draco's grandmother's. It's something of a tradition to be passed down from wife to wife every other generation or so."

"I'm afraid I just never got around to it. We haven't really..." his voice trailed.

"I understand, honey," Narcissa assured us. "You two are still adjusting, and that's fine. Isn't it, Lucius?"

It was quite obvious that the senior Malfoy was annoyed with his son, for whatever reason. Still, to appease his wife, he huffed out a half-hearted agreement and nodded. The look in his eyes and pursed lips however clearly showcased that he was displeased.

We made some small talk, luckily my parents joined us so the six of us were all together once again.

"When were you going to tell us you decided to perform the opening dance?" my mother asked.

I looked at her confusedly. "Were we not supposed to?"

"It was a happy surprise, but certainly unexpected. It's wonderful to see you and Draco getting along so well as newlyweds," she pulled me in for a hug.

Was that the reason why? To symbolize some sort of happiness in our relationship, or show off some false reality that we were actually content with each other? That didn't make any sense. Draco and I had only started tolerating each other just weeks ago, and really only enjoying each other's company perhaps yesterday.

"After all, young Draco is apart of the family now. Your mother and I are pleased you decided to take part," my father smiled. I hadn't seen him look so satisfied in quite a long time. It could very well be that he was faking it, but I didn't see a reason for him to, considering my mother and Narcissa were both seemingly happy as well.

"Speaking of family, I've been meaning to tell you both some exciting news. I've found a lovely manor for you both in the countryside—"

"Honey, let's not bother them with this tonight," Narcissa cut Lucius off.

"I agree," my mother chimed in. "After all, it's a ball. Let the kids enjoy themselves."

"We can discuss the arrangements of this further at a later date," my father added.

Although I was rather happy with how things were going, or at least not decidedly unhappy, Lucius' comment made me almost feel sick. I was plenty aware of the fact I was standing with my legally wedded husband at a family ball that he actually lay some claim to now, but it was the last thing on my mind. We still had our final year of school to finish and for us to get used to each other before any of the unfortunate arranged marriage is applicable.

I was just getting used to the idea of having Draco around. Playing a game, reading together, maybe sharing a meal. Now the concept of living together? Inevitably being forced to bear an heir for him? The thoughts in my mind were swirling too quickly that my mood changed immediately.

Draco must have picked up on it, because I felt his hand lightly rub the small of my back.

Despite the fabric of my dress being quite thick, I could still sense the coldness of his fingers where he touched. He lightly kneaded my back up and down, up and down—

"Shall we have another dance?" I heard him ask me.

My attention was turned away from my thoughts and back to Draco, who had his neck craned down to look at me.

"I— uh, suppose," I nodded compliantly. "Until later, I'm sure," I bid our parents goodbye, Draco doing the same.

Chapter Text

Much to my surprise, Draco didn't lead me to the center of the dance floor like I'd presumed, but to the garden patio just outside the manor that was connected to the ballroom.

"I thought we were going to have a dance?" I inquired.

By now, it was very dark and most of the illumination of the garden was (except for the light peaking in from the ballroom) just from the moon and stars. The moon was crescent, slightly fat which provided a bit more light.

"I figured you'd prefer a walk to calm your nerves."

Although I knew there weren't any surprises of where this garden walk may go, I still followed his indirect lead of walking down the cobblestoned path of the garden. The pace was slow. Unlike many other times we've walked, or been forced to walk together on prefect patrols, this wasn't rushed or with an underlying tone of wanting it to be over soon enough.

This walk was much more relaxing. Combined with my desire for fresh air, the crispness of the autumn night was perfect for waking me up a bit without stressing me further.

"You could tell?"

"You certainly didn't look comfortable once my father brought up the house he's found for us."

"No, I wasn't," I breathed deeply. "I just wasn't expecting it."

"Neither was I. Still, I can't say I was surprised that he did that. It's something he'd do..."

I took the opportunity to slightly shift the conversation to him than me when he mentioned this. There was a trace of frustration in his tone, almost malice but not quite as aggressive.

"You didn't look that comfortable either when he brought up the ring," I gestured to the engagement ring on my finger. He quickly glanced down at it before shaking his head.

At that, I instinctively looked at his left hand to see the ring I gave him. It glistened the pale moonlight, looking a bit cold on him. I noticed he twiddled with it using his thumb during our stroll.

"It's not a big deal, really. He thinks it is since it's a Malfoy tradition to pass that onto a new wife every few generations."

I felt somewhat disgruntled at his response. Not upset, necessarily, but he made it sound as if he didn't care about it whatsoever. Did he not? I am only his wife, after all. But when did that start bothering me, what he thought?

"For sake of discussion," I mused, slightly frowning, "you wouldn't have chosen this emerald, then?"

"Of course not," he sneered. "You don't like green."

"What's that got to do—"

"I would've chosen something you preferred. Not something I was told to pass on for the sake of family tradition."

With my right index and middle finger, I slowly rotated the engagement ring around, absentmindedly playing with it a little. It didn't feel quite right in my grasp, he was right about that. It didn't suit me.

He looked much more appealing in this dimmer lighting. His features looked softer, less threatening. Although we'd been on plenty of prefect patrols at late hours together, those were... different, to say the least. Those were under more official pretenses, we were forced to do those together. This was of our own choice. I could've not followed him out here, opting to stay inside.

In fact, we could've avoided each other almost entirely on this trip if we chose to do so. It wasn't necessary to make small talk which turned into light heartened banter. It wasn't necessary to play games until we had headaches. It wasn't necessary to chat in bed until we were so sleepy we fell asleep.

"I appreciate that," I gave a small smile. "I'm aware the ring wasn't your choice."

"And none of this was your choice."

"I suppose not. It's just the cards we've been dealt, being in these families."

"Yeah... that's it..." his voice trailed.

I gave him a skeptical look with a raised eyebrow, silently asking what he meant by that. He simply shook his head, as if moving onto the next topic.

"Do you ever think about that? How you've been thrown in this, just expected to live out your life as if you weren't in this... situation," he asked.

Of course I have. It's all I do, seemingly. I feel like it consumes me wholly, but I couldn't necessarily say that. As much as I didn't want to marry him, I still had respect for him as my husband. I didn't want it to sound like I absolutely hated him. There were, in theory, worse people to be thrown to.

"I try to avoid thinking about it as much as possible. However, I still do, a lot of the time."

He stayed silent for a moment. He gestured to bench on the path and sat down. I took my place next to him.

"I figured you wouldn't want to walk around in those heels. Sorry, it just occurred to me now," he bashfully apologized. He brushed a few loose strands of hair out of his face.

"It didn't bother me," I assured him, trying to get comfortable on the seat. "But thank you."

We both looked up at the stars. I knew he was quite apt regarding astronomy —we were in the same class and he always appeared to get the highest marks— so I'm sure he had plenty to say. At least, I thought so, but his eyes weren't focused. They seemed like they were absentmindedly looking up to pass time.

"I think about it all the time," he softly muttered.

"You do?" I turned my neck to look at him, who did the same to meet my gaze.

"Every waking minute."

Then, it was my turn to stay silent. I didn't quite know what a proper response to that would be. I couldn't exactly say that was pathetic, because I was almost doing the same. I couldn't say it wasn't worth it, since it wasn't an easy situation to adapt to.

"I'm sorry it affects you so negatively," I opted to reply as coolly as possible.

"I didn't say that."

"Isn't that what you meant?"

"Not quite," his voice hushed to just above a whisper before pausing for a moment. His breath hitched before he spoke again. "You're not a bad choice for wife, y/n."

"Oh," I sighed, slightly embarrassed. I felt the same about him, that there were worse options. It almost shocked me that I was thinking that, though. Just a few weeks, perhaps just days ago, I would've thought differently. "You're not the worst choice for a husband, either."

A small grin tugged on his lips. He returned his attention to the sky.

"You know, we never even got a honeymoon," he lightly laughed, causing me to do the same.

"At the time, I don't think it would've been put to good use. We couldn't stand being in the same room, let alone on a vacation somewhere together."

"I know what you mean," he chuckled, which I returned. "I remember how quickly you pulled away from our first kiss."

"Our only kiss, too. I don't think either of us were thrilled for our wedding kiss, not with all of our families watching, expecting it of us."

"I genuinely felt like you were going to wipe your mouth after that," he grimaced jokingly.

"I thought you'd ditch me at the altar," I laughed.

"Never," he softly chuckled. It was more breathy, if anything. He looked down, before returning his eyes back to the stars. "Still, that honeymoon... it might've been a good opportunity to get where we are now, though. You know, okay with each other's presence."

"I think we're a little further than that, don't you?"

The grin on his face grew. His white teeth shone a little in the dim lighting.

"I'd like to think so. Even if I've been less than pleasant with you up until now."

"You were actually a complete prick," I chuckled. "I couldn't stand the sight of you."

"I probably deserved that. I wasn't exactly the most gentlemanly; if anything, I was the opposite. I shouldn't have acted like that."

"No, you shouldn't have. At least you've improved."

He turned to look at me, eyes boring into mine. The slight glint of the light bouncing off his blue-grey eyes, looking far more grey in this lighting, made them shine among the rest of his muted features.

"No, y/n, I really shouldn't have been like that. For Merlin's sake, you're my wife, as much as you don't want to hear it, and I can't blame you for that either. It's no wonder you hated me for so long, I treated you horribly when I should have been making an effort—"

"Slow down, Draco," I cut off his rambling but he looked more serious than ever. "You're right in that you treated me poorly, I thought you hated me, too. But I like the way things are progressing; I'm finding it easier to be around you."

"I don't want for you to just tolerate 'being around' me, it should be more than that."

"I'd like for us to be more pleasant with each other, too, but the reality is we're going to have to take baby steps if we don't want to be miserable forever."

"Miserable?" He suddenly became more animated, his eyebrows furrowing and wrinkles tainting his soft features. "You're miserable, right now?"

"I didn't mean it like that, I meant that since it wasn't our choice that this is less than ideal—"

"For you, but—" he rambled quickly, before cutting himself off and continuing with, "I'm willing to make this work if you are! Why can't we just progress a little faster?"

"Draco, where's all this coming from? You've never said this much about our marriage, then you just spring it all on at once?"

"I told you this is all I think about! I swear, every minute I'm with you on patrols, in our classes together, eating at the same table in the Great Hall. Even when I'm not with you, I'm with my friends, playing quidditch, alone in my bed at night, all I can think about is this damn marriage and how I've fucked it up already!"

"Did you think this was going to be easy? That the two of us who have hated each other our entire lives would just get along—"

"You think I hate you?" he deadpanned.

"At least I thought you did—"

"No, I'm talking about now. Do you think I hate you?"

I didn't exactly know what to say. It felt like I was being interrogated, if anything. He kept cutting me off, asking quick questions I didn't have time to formulate a response, it was like I was being pressed for information I didn't even have the answers to.

"I don't think you hate me now, but I'm sure you would if your father didn't force you to come to this ball or be polite to me!"

He slumped in his seat, breathing out slowly. His huffs sounded full of contempt, or annoyance at the least. Draco's brows were furrowed, and his lip curled into something of a sneer.

"If you think that's the case, then I'm doing a worse job than I thought."

"What are you talking about? Merlin, stop being so vague!"

"Me being vague? I swear, y/n, I can't—" he stopped himself mid-sentence, took a deep breath and regained some sort of composure that he lacked a moment ago. He spoke much softer and restrained, and looked like he was masking anger bubbling under the surface. "I can't blame you for thinking that. Not after how I treated you."

"Draco, I saw the way you clammed up with your father earlier this evening when he thought you were being a bad husband. Of course, I'm going to assume you're only acting this way because of him. What other reason could there be?"

He looked back to meet my eyes, looking more defeated. His slouched figure had his legs jutting out lazily, hands laying in his lap and neck craned to face me. I could faintly make out some vein popping out of his neck in the dark lighting.

"There could be a lot of other reasons."

I scoffed. "Again with the vagueness. I know we're not exactly the best of friends, but you could at least be direct with me."

"Trust me, I'm trying to get there..." his voice trailed.

I started to stand up slowly, preening my dress a little to look neater. "Look, maybe we should just go inside. We're meant to be in there, dancing with everyone else. I think we'll be missed if we stay out any longer..."

He grabbed my arm, looking up at me. His eyes were large, with his lips parted and looking almost remorseful. His fingers on my wrist were cold, but not uninviting, like earlier in the night.

"I can't go back in there with you upset with me. I'm sick of fucking things up with you— this..."

"Draco, it's really no big deal—" I tried assuring him, but once again he cut me off.

"No, it is a big deal. Please, for once, accept that it's a problem so we can move past it," he pleaded, his grip on my wrist still sending shivers of coldness up my arm.

"What do you want me to do? You were just expressing how you feel, I can't do anything about it."

"Forgive me."

"What?" I looked at him, my eyebrows raised. It wasn't so much of a command, but rather an apology, in his own way. I know he didn't have much experience with apologizing, so I figured this was the best he could do.

"Please, forgive me. We seemed to be doing so well, this trip made us... better. I don't want it to go away."

I took a deep breath, to which I noticed him visibly stiffen, sitting up straighter than he did before. He was still looking up at me with that soft expression, and only then did I realize how cold it was outside. The autumn, nearing winter climate must have made my face pale and cold to the touch. Perhaps it wasn't his fingers that seemed cold, but just the night.

"Alright," I looked down, nodding slightly. "I liked how things were going, too. I don't want to start over, either."

I didn't have the courage to look at him again. I tried my best at averting eye contact, which I think he was displeased with. Nonetheless, he stood up, still with my wrist in his grasp. I could feel his presence hovering near me, his body heat providing some warmth against the cool night.

"Now, would you come back to the ball with me? Put on a show for whoever's watching."

I felt his fingers around my wrist slip down to intertwine with mine, his long fingers reaching around the back of my hand and warming it up.

He was so delicate, as much as he tried not to seem like it at school. I'd never met someone with such an outwardly cold personality, but on the inside being so insecure as to fear any instability in his life.

The only positive was that he didn't seem angry toward me; all of the actual answers he did give me during our conversation sounded like he was trying to make an effort. I could tell by the way he restrained himself from getting angrier than he could have been.

He led me back to the ballroom where we danced together. He didn't ask, simply taking me to the center of the floor and pulling me close. The hand he held with mine stayed like that, the other wrapping around my waist.

We didn't speak again that night.

Apart from a few passing conversations from relatives or guests coming to greet us, we didn't verbally interact with each other.

I stayed in his arms the entire night and well into the early morning, just dancing. No talking.

It wasn't uncomfortable. It was a mutually understood silence. Neither of us had anything to say; we were content with the fact that the air had been cleared between us, but we weren't in the mood to make any more progress than we already had. Our chatting and playing games and reading with each other might have been pushing the amount of friendliness we could achieve in one weekend.

If anything, I think we both felt more comfortable in each other's arms than to say anything at all. It seemed like an acclimation of the relationship we'd developed over the past however many weeks of slowly tolerating each other.

It wasn't much, but it was all he could give me tonight. I'd take it as a sign of overall progress.

Chapter Text

"Any idea what's been bothering Draco?" Theo asked.

He was laying on his back on my bed, holding a book above his head that he was pretending to read. I shifted in my chair to turn around to look at him. My homework could wait a few moments.

"What are you talking about?"

"You tell me," he shrugged. "Since you got back from the ball, he's been moodier than ever. And for him, that's saying something..."

"Has he? He's seemed the same more or less, to me," I replied.

Well, that was somewhat a lie. He'd been the same as he was the night of the ball, anyway.

I'd seen him regularly since the ball. Apart from prefect duties, we still had classes together and were often together in the Slytherin common room at the same time or doing some other shared activity.

Typically, he would try to make some sort of conversation, but if it didn't naturally flow, he didn't push or try to get me to talk. In a way, it was disappointing since I liked the progress we were making. It was short lived, but sweet.

The conversation, however, was oddly polite for him. He didn't make snide remarks, no insults... perhaps a distasteful comment here or there about a student or someone breaking the rules, but never about me, or surprisingly even my friends. I could only assume that it was his way of trying to break that barrier that we put up the night of the ball, despite the fact that I told him I forgave him for his outburst.

It wasn't a lie, either. I genuinely did forgive him for being short with me at the ball. I couldn't really care about one minor setback after the rather large and enjoyable breakthrough we had over the course of the whole weekend.

"He's definitely not been the same," Theo shook his head, sitting up and turning to face me. His shoulders slumped, giving him a relaxed look. His hair was a bit messy as well from lying down.

"'Moodier than usual'," I echoed, "with you, or people in general?"

"Both, I guess. Especially during quidditch, I've noticed during our practices that he has way more aggression than usual."

I looked at him quizzically, to which he elaborated by explaining that Draco had been at fault for multiple teammates being knocked off their broomsticks, causing arguments, and injuring a few people, all in addition to pushing himself to work harder than before. It was very unlike him. Typically he was aggressive, but not to his own teammates or causing stirs on practice time.

"I've been with him plenty of times since we got back and I haven't seen any of that. Quite the opposite, actually."

"He might be bottling it up around you. Blaise has noticed it, too. We talked about it during lunch today... there's something up with him."

Seeing how he's behaved (around me, anyway) I could tell he was certainly capable of being tame and polite when he wanted to. It wouldn't surprise me that he had the ability to act that way, but I couldn't figure why he would bother being pleasant around me and even nastier than usual to everyone else, according to Theo.

"His father must have spoken to him, then," I huffed, trying to return my attention to my homework again. This attempt was proven feeble when Theo quickly caught my attention again.

"Huh? Since when does Lucius care about how Draco treats everyone else?"

"You should've seen him at the ball. Draco was practically shaking when his father made it clear he was disappointed in him, and for something so miniscule."

Theo shrugged. "Maybe he does want him to be nicer to you. You are his wife, after all."

I visibly cringed at that. "Say it a little louder next time? I don't think all of Hogwarts heard you."

He laughed lightly. I'd missed his lopsided grin while I was gone. "Sorry, I forgot you don't want people knowing."

"Let's talk about something else, shall we? I just got back from home, I don't need to revisit the topic so fast. Back to this arithmancy sheet, hm?"

"You know I'd rather not talk about homework," he flopped back on my bed with a thud. He stared up at the ceiling with his legs spread out slightly, and arms resting near his head. "I just got you back from your trip and all you want to talk about is school," he chuckled.

"Unless you've got something more interesting to discuss?"

He paused for a moment. I heard a humming sound come from him before he piped up again.

"Slug Club's first dinner is coming up soon."

This, however, piqued my interest. I had been so preoccupied with other things that Slughorn's festivities totally slipped my mind.

"Right, that's this Friday. Merlin, I'm stupid... I should have brought back a dress or something from home to wear."

"Your normal clothes will be fine," Theo dismissively replied. "You always look nice, anyway."

"Still, I'd rather not look awful if this is a Slughorn event. I've seen the types of parties he hosts, they're pretty sophisticated, if you ignore the fact that the guest list is made up of dumb teenagers."

"Not so dumb, actually. Sluggy is pretty selective about who makes the cut."

"I suppose so. You know anyone else who made the list?"

"Blaise, actually. McLaggen... I don't know for sure, but I suppose Potter would be there, too."

"At least we'll know people then. You and Blaise can sit together."

"You won't be sitting with us?" he sat up from his laying-down position on the bed. He used his arms behind him to support his weight, still in a slumped position with his shoulders pressed up against his neck. With a turn of his head, he flicked his shaggy brown hair to the side and out of his eyes.

"I mean... Cedric will be there too, so..." my voice trailed, a little shy at the mention of him after our previous encounters where he was a little more flirty than desirable. Actually, it was desirable. Just not acceptable.

The end of his lips tugged up in that half grin of his that I knew so well. The look of it sent a blush to creep up my neck and tint my face pink.

"You and Diggory, eh? I swear, he seems like the one you'll never forget. Even a marriage can't keep you two crazy kids apart."

"Theo!" I playfully threw a pillow at him, causing his hair to mess up and the both of us to laugh.

"At least it was a pillow and not a shoe like that one time at the Black Lake," he chuckled, throwing the pillow back at me.

"I'm serious! You know how I felt— feel... whatever it is I happen to think of him. Your joking doesn't help the situation."

"And I feel like you should consider what you're doing here," he replied, suddenly appearing a big more somber. I raised an eyebrow in response, to which he seemingly picked up as confusion.

"I mean you should be more careful," he shook his head. "As much as I like Cedric, I really do, you can't be fooling around with him so much."

"Theo, we're not together. We're just... spending a lot of time together."

"Spending time with your ex boyfriend who you still have major feelings for isn't the most... couth thing for a wife to be doing."

"You're calling me uncouth?" I was almost offended. Was he accusing me of cheating?

"Not necessarily. Just... watch yourself, okay? I love you, but it's getting harder for me to split my loyalties between you and Draco."

At that, I was genuinely irritated. What did Theo need to split loyalties for? He always supported me in everything, even when he didn't think I was making the best decisions. Now he was suddenly having some enlightenment about his feelings regarding loyalty? It was all backward in my mind.

"I think you're mistaken, Theo, there's nothing to worry about. And you don't need to 'split loyalties' either."

"It appears I do," he sighed, looking more uncomfortable. "The closer you get with Diggory, the more upset Draco will be. I don't know if I can keep defending you when it's so obvious you want him. If you're so close with Cedric, then you're lucky Draco won't be there."

"At the Slug Club you mean? Why would that matter?"

Theo gave me a face that seemed to read as nothing other than "duh", with eyes wide and brows furrowed together. He lightly laughed before shaking his head in a jokingly condescending way.

"It's pretty obvious, y/n."

"I mean, I'm sure Draco would have some outburst at the dinner but that's how he always is. That's probably why he didn't get an invitation from Slughorn in the first place."

"You're totally missing my point," he chuckled. "You must be joking."

"I'm really not, Theo. We both know how Draco is, he's just pretty prone to random fits—"

"You're being serious?" Theo cut me off, giving me a much more focused look.

I shrugged. "Yeah? So tell me what you're thinking, because I don't follow."

He rolled his eyes. "Y/n, I love you, but you're utterly clueless sometimes."

"About what? Seriously, Theo, tell me—"

"Draco would be jealous."

My eyebrows knit together and I let out a quick snort of laughter, to which he simply rolled his eyes together. There was no way Theo could be serious; that would never happen with Draco and I.

"I think you're mistaken, Theo. We don't have that kind of relationship. It's strictly cordial, maybe even friendly at this point if we've made it there."

"You are married, aren't you?"

"Of course we are, but you know the whole situation with that isn't really romantic, per se."

He shook his head, letting it roll back before looking at me again. He looked a tad frustrated, perhaps annoyed with me which I wholeheartedly returned. The feeling was mutual.

"Y/n, I really doubt that... but even so, assuming that's the case, he can still be jealous even if you two haven't had any sort of romantic feelings yet."

"Not really, Theo. That doesn't make sense for him to be jealous if he doesn't feel anything."

"Think about it this way: if the situation were reversed, would you like the idea of him being with another girl? Having feelings for her? The way that you do for Cedric..."

I suppose I hadn't really considered it much. I remember toward the beginning of school, Theo did casually mention something that alluded to the fact that Draco was probably seeing other girls. But at the time, I hated him; I didn't care if he was interested in other girls because it simply didn't matter to me.

Now? I couldn't quite say.

"I... I guess I see what you mean, a little bit..."

He smirked again, looking smug with himself. "Now imagine that, plus feelings involved."

"Theo, I doubt he has any feelings for me—"

"Fine. Just imagine it."

I thought of Cedric being with another girl. The concept alone made my blood boil. The difference was with Cedric, I had undeniable feelings for him and it was obvious enough that Theo could see it, even if we broke up months ago.

I then thought of Draco with another girl, plus imagined myself having feelings for him. If the thought of Cedric with someone else made me upset, the thought of my husband with someone else could push me to the brink of insanity. I felt a psychotic anger bubble up inside of me that I didn't know how to process, like my mind was being tugged in a million different directions.

I then came back to reality and remembered that I was just imagining how it might, hypothetically, be. I had to remind myself that Draco and I didn't have any romantic relationship, just were legally married.

In a way, that did make me somewhat possessive over him.

I always figured husbands and wives should be loyal to each other, which is why I broke up with Cedric when I did. After our relationship improved to the point where it was after the ball, I did feel some type of... jealousy?

It wasn't a romantic jealousy, that I necessarily felt like I needed to have his affection. It was more of the fact that he's my husband, not someone else's boy toy. He shouldn't be wasting his time moving around from girl to girl when he knows he belongs to me... legally, in terms of our marriage, he does.

"I see what you mean," I grumbled, looking down and avoiding his gaze.

"And we all know that Draco is even more territorial than you, y/n."

"I know," I huffed, "it's one of the things I always despised about him."

"You're missing the point, again," he rolled his eyes.

"Then what is the point?"

"It's in his nature to want you all for himself."

Chapter Text

"Tell me something about yourself," Draco piped up during our prefect patrol.

He'd been almost silent the whole night, not really engaging for anything other than small remarks like "I'll check this corridor" or "you go that way". I assumed he was having one of his episodes, so I didn't press for more information or try to engage him in conversation.

"What do you wanna know?"

"Anything."

"That doesn't really narrow it down," I dryly chuckled.

"Just talk about something. Things about you."

I racked my brain trying to think of something. I was so focused on trying to think of anything worthwhile that it didn't even process in my mind how unusual it was of him to make that request— command, more like. After a few moments of silence, I finally spoke the first words that came to mind.

"I miss home."

He turned his head to look at me. "Home? We just came back from the ball not long ago."

"Not that home," I corrected him softly. "I meant Italy. I haven't been there in so long."

"I almost forget you're not from Britain; you hardly even have an Italian accent. You can barely tell... it's like its own, unique articulation. It suits you, though."

"I almost forget it sometimes, too, hence why I want to go back."

"When was the last time you were there?"

That was a good question.. when was the last time? I ran a hand through my hair and tried to think back.

"A couple years ago, the summer before fifth year," I smiled, reminiscing. "I was only there for a week, though. I haven't spent any real time there since I was a child."

"Why don't you go back then?"

"All of my family is here now. Well, most of it anyway. I have grandparents and extended family there, but it's just different."

I couldn't exactly explain everything to him. Not here, anyway, and especially not now. It was hardly the proper place for a heart-to-heart. However, it was interesting to know that he was capable of having them since that night of the ball.

Since our little ballroom spat, he apologized profusely over and over again, to which I always assured him, "I already forgave you". Maybe it finally sunk in that I was being honest.

"I'm assuming the ball made you a bit homesick then?"

"You could say that. I'm sorry about all that, by the way. I probably owe you an apology after the hundred apologies you gave me," I muttered.

He scoffed lightly. There was no malice in it, just a somewhat playful grin. "No need to apologize."

"My family is pretty insane, though. You remember how you were swarmed by them the entire night."

"Your family can't be any worse than mine," he mused, almost chuckling softly, but not quite.

"Let's not test the waters tonight," I looked up at him who slightly nodded.

He paused for a moment before speaking again. The silence seemed loud. "Maybe someday soon you'll get to go back. To Italy, I mean. Why not after we finish school?"

"We".

I was fully aware of the great likelihood that he was referring to our graduating year, but the fact that he even used the word "we" made me uneasy. Draco was more tolerable to me and I was happy about that fact, but I still wasn't totally comfortable with the idea that there was a "we" between us. However, there was something... relieving about it. That he might be there with me if I ever decided to go home and visit.

"Maybe," I murmured, not having considered the future all that much. I suppose it was worth a thought. "Tell me something about you now."

"I much prefer hearing about you."

"That's not how this works," I forced a laugh. "I told you something, now you tell me something in return."

"I don't remember making that deal," he quipped, the ends of his lips tugging up in a smirk.

I rolled my eyes. "I don't want to just talk about myself, Draco. That's not how a conversation works."

"Fine," he huffed, "I don't know if there's something you'd want to hear about me, though."

"Anything."

"That doesn't really narrow it down," he lightly mocked me from earlier, causing me to lightly laugh. He could be cheeky when he wanted to.

"Right," I breathed out. "Something about your family, maybe. I don't know them well."

He exhaled slowly, suddenly looking a little more somber. "That's probably a conversation for another time, another place."

It was like he read my mind; roaming around the corridors at night wasn't exactly the best place to discuss any deeper issues, especially when someone else could just so happen to eavesdrop and hear.

"Why not something about your friends then? Hobbies?"

"You sound like an orientation tour guide," he chuckled, his mood lifting again. "Want me to name three interesting facts about myself next?"

I joined him in letting out another laugh, the smile on my face growing in size larger than the last.

"That would assume you have three interesting things about you," I joked.

"Ouch," he chuckled, "I could mention how I'm fantastic at wizard's chess... but would be willing to let you win every now and then. You know, to be a gentleman."

"I think my eight game win streak of Senet would beg to differ. Seriously, though, what do you like to do?"

He remained silent for a minute. I was half expecting him to make some smug, boyish remark, but he looked like he was actually in thought about what to say.

"I don't know, really. I usually just spend most of my time alone."

"Doesn't your posse follow you around all of the time?"

"They get tiresome," he shrugged. "I much prefer my own company, most days. Reading, practicing with the snitch. I write a fair bit."

I looked at him quizzically. "You spend most of your time alone?"

"You sound so surprised."

"I suppose I am..." my voice trailed. "I don't know, I've been so used to seeing you tailed by Crabbe and Goyle, even Zabini or sometimes Theo."

"Theo and Blaise are better company; I outgrew the former. Still, they don't always... understand me, you could say. It's better to just stay with your own thoughts when that happens."

I was suddenly forced to consider the possibility that perhaps Draco did have some human decency. I hadn't necessarily espoused any sympathy for him, not that he would want it anyway, but it was interesting to hear that he was used to being alone. Perhaps the incident in my library of him playing Senet by his lonesome wasn't as unique as I presumed it was.

"What kinds of things do you think about?" I mused.

"Your turn," he shook his head. "You essentially asked two questions and I let it slide. I get to ask you something now."

"Fine," I huffed. "At least I know what the next thing I'm asking you is."

"Cross that bridge when we get to it," he waved his hand dismissively. "I want to know what you think of Nott."

"Theo?" I cocked my head. "That's not really a question, though."

"You two are friends, are you not?"

"We are; I don't see why that's a matter of inquiry."

"Just... what do you think of him? It's not complicated."

"I mean, he's a great guy and I enjoy his company," I mused. "I still don't really know what you're asking, though."

"What is there to like about him?"

I looked at him, slightly offended that he basically just insulted his own friend.

"You could have a little more respect for him," I crossed my arms over my chest, naturally shrinking inward as I felt uncomfortable suddenly.

"No, you misunderstood me," he corrected, looking at me with softer eyes. "I meant what is it you like about him? What makes him so... charming?"

"I wouldn't exactly say Theo is 'charming', per se, but there are certain things I like about him... he's just a good friend, I suppose."

"That's it?" he inquired, looking perplexed. His eyebrows knitted together and wrinkle lines appeared on his forehead.

"What else is there to say? He's got a good sense of humor, he's a gentleman... most of the time, anyway," I dryly laughed. "Why do you ask?"

He cleared his throat and ran a hand through his hair. "No reason."

I rolled my eyes. "Don't give me that, Draco, you can't just—"

"I said there's no reason, y/n. We were just making conversation, is that a crime?"

His voice wasn't louder or more domineering, but the inflection in tone of his voice suggested that he was frustrated, or at the very least, wanting the topic to end.

I never got to ask my question.

My suspicions were confirmed as he didn't make the effort to continue our discussion, and I certainly wasn't going to after his little outburst. We picked up our pace and made better time with the patrols once we weren't as occupied with talking. To my surprise, there weren't any students wandering around so it was easier than most nights.

Although we had been in silence for quite some time since he cut off our conversation, he eventually pulled me aside to the corner of an empty corridor that I couldn't quite make out due to how dark it was. His fingers were cold around my arm for the fleeting moment he grabbed me, and I could feel the lingering frostiness of his fingers as soon as he removed them.

The light provided by a nearby lantern was really the only way I could see him. His features looked softer in the dim lighting, less threatening and more humanizing. His pupils were larger, lessening the piercing effects of his icy gray irises. They bore into mine as his mouth slightly parted, the pale color of his thin lips softening the sneer that had been there a moment ago.

"I wanted to say I... I'm sorry for the way I've been treating you," he murmured, barely audible.

His voice was a hushed whisper, his hot breath fanning my face. Only then did I realize how close we actually were, with my back pressed against the cold stones of the wall and his body proximity so close that I could feel his heat radiating onto me. We weren't quite pressed up against each other, but if one of us moved the slightest bit more, we would be.

I was so dumbfounded that all I could choke out was a meek, "What do you mean?"

"You... don't deserve my short temper. I forget that I can't treat you the same as everyone else. I want to be more like him... like Theo. Someone who's easy to be around. Someone you'd like to be around."

"Draco..." I breathed out, noticing him shift his weight at the sound of his name, "don't bring that up. Not now... you said yourself this isn't the time for that."

As much as I'm sure we both were aware of the necessity for us to have a genuine conversation about it, it couldn't be here. Not this late at night, in an empty corridor that a student or professor could waltz down at any minute. As much as I was liking the idea of spending more time with him, I didn't want anyone walking in and seeing us.

Especially not when we were so close. His proximity almost made me tremble, partly out of anxiety for his rapidly changing personality and partly for the way I physically felt.

To his merit, he wasn't touching me. One of his hands was rested on the wall next to my head, and the other lying by his side. His face was leaning down to be level with me, leaving a hunch in his long back. But he wasn't touching me. He almost made me tremble and he wasn't even touching me.

"The conversation we had the night of the ball was a shit one," he muttered lowly. "I didn't say half the things I meant to... or wanted to, and the things I did say weren't worthwhile."

"Draco... can't we talk about this some other time?"

The hand that was resting by his side shot up quickly to slap against the wall next to my head, causing a loud smack to be heard echoing down the corridor. It made me flinch, the sudden movement so surprising after our relatively slow talk.

"I just needed to tell you that I'm trying to do better."

"You don't have to—"

"Yes, I do," he purred. "Whatever you were thinking, yes I do."

Chapter Text

"This is a little excessive, y/n," Daphne rolled her eyes.

Poor girl, I had dragged her around every dress shop that the wizarding world had to offer. We even ended up using floo powder to jump from place to place.

"I have to find an outfit suitable for this Slughorn party," I mumbled, pushing dresses to the side on the rack I was looking at. Tons looked fine; some floral, neutral, shorter, longer. But none of them quite spoke to me.

"I'm not even invited to the party," she huffed, "I'm getting tired, too. Just meet up with Theo again outside and he can help you find something."

"Daphne! I need your opinion. I can't ask a man... especially not Theo for this. He's got no sense of style," I forced a chuckle, trying to put a smile on my unhappy best friend's face.

She was having none of it. Her arms crossed over her chest and annoyed expression said it all: she wanted to go back to our room. "Look, I can go grab Theo for you, he's just next door. I really don't want to just wander around, especially since I'm not shopping for anything."

As much as I wanted to convince her to stay and help me look some more, I knew she wasn't interested. I felt like we hadn't seen much of each other lately, and despite the fact we lived in the same dorm room and told each other everything, I still missed having her around and doing fun things together. Cleary, this wasn't fun to her, though.

"Fine," I gave in, a half-hearted smile playing on my lips that she didn't bother reciprocating. "You can just go back. I'll wait for Theo myself. He's just picking up his clothes, anyway."

For the first time all afternoon she looked relieved. I can't say I blamed her, I'd get bored just accompanying her shopping too. I made a mental note to plan something fun for the two of us sometime soon.

I followed her outside and bid her goodbye before she Floo'd back to Hogwarts, leaving me to wander into the men's dress shop and wait for Theo to collect his clothes. We all came together, but split off when I needed to buy a dress and Theo just needed to pick his up that he ordered a few days prior. The shop looked rather busy, though, so I assumed he was in line.

Toward the front of the shop, there was a few chairs for what looked like a waiting area so I took the opportunity to sit down and just be patient. There were a few newspapers around, so I picked one up just to entertain myself for the while I was waiting.

My eyes scanned over rather than thoroughly read the paper, looking for anything interesting to catch my attention. A few scandals in the Ministry, a big donation to some wizarding charity, the new quidditch season heating up... nothing overly interesting. I was probably waiting for a few minutes before my attention was grabbed away from the paper.

"Y/n?" I heard my name being called by a masculine voice.

"Oh, Cedric," I smiled, tossing the paper aside and standing up to give him a hug.

He had a cheeky grin on his face, dressed casually and holding a garment bag over his right shoulder. His index and middle finger of his right hand were holding it up as it rested on his back.

"What have you got there?" I inquired, pointing to the bag.

"Just something for Slughorn's dinner party. I heard it's quite fancy. Couldn't show up looking like some riff-raff," he grinned. "What about yourself? This isn't exactly your type of store..."

I returned his chuckle with one of my own, laughing that I looked strange being the only girl in a men's fashion shop.

"Just waiting for someone. Trust me, I'm not buying."

The smile that was on his face slowly turned upside-down, the features of his cheeks looking depressed and the glint in his eyes disappearing.

"That... makes sense. Sorry if I'm bothering you..."

"No, you're not at all," I assured him, trying to figure out why he looked so sad all of a sudden. "In fact, I'm happy you're here. We haven't talked for a few days and I've missed our chats."

"Right," he awkwardly cleared his throat, his eyebrows tugging together. He looked over his shoulder in a nervous fashion before looking back down to me.

"What's the matter?" I asked. "You're not the nervous type."

"Who, uh, are you waiting for?"

I cocked my head, a bit taken back by that question. I noticed his features still carrying that same ghost of anxiety or perhaps distress.

"Theo; he's meant to be picking up something for Slughorn's, too... Ced, what's the matter? You're so distraught now."

"Theo?" He narrowed his eyes, nostrils flaring. "You mean Theodore Nott?"

"Of course... Ced, what's the matter? You're worrying me."

"You two aren't dating, are you?"

At the mention of possibly dating Theo, I instinctively laughed a bit louder than I would've liked, my shoulders slumping and a huge grin plastered on my face before regaining my composure.

"Me? Date Theo? No way, he's a great guy but we're just friends. I'm forcing him to help me pick out a dress after he gets his clothes," I let out between heaves of laughter.

I couldn't believe Cedric would even entertain such a thought... Theo wasn't bad looking, if anything he was the opposite and even admittedly attractive, but that doesn't mean I was interested in him. I didn't see anything past friendship with him.

Cedric visibly relaxed at this, his shoulders less tense and features looking more relaxed. The same smile that was on his face a few minutes ago returned, looking the same as I was used to.

"Thank Merlin," he shook his head, his blue eyes looking cooler when they met mine. "I'm sorry... I don't know what came over me; some weird... I don't know. It's over now, though."

The poor guy absolutely must have been jealous. From the looks of it, there might have been something between us since these weren't quite activities that "just friends" did with each other. Especially not with someone as handsome as Theo. If the situation were reversed, I probably would have thought he was interested in another girl if he did the same.

"Don't apologize," I treaded carefully, not wanting to upset him further. "I can assure you, there's no need."

His gaze lingered on mine, comforting as always. He ran a hand through his honey-brown hair and straightened it out a bit. He remained quiet for a moment before speaking again.

"I take it you'll be at the Slug Club party on Friday then?"

I nodded, smiling. "Once I figure out something to wear... if not, I might as well just skip."

He chuckled. "You could have asked me to help you find an outfit. I would've gladly done so... even if you look good in everything."

I felt a hint of a blush heat up my face before I forced myself to push it away. Now was not the time for flirting. Actually, considering the state of things, it was never a time for flirting, but especially not now.

"Thanks, Cedric. I'm sure whatever you got today will be perfect, too."

The grin on his face grew before he promptly scratched the back of his neck with his free hand. "You flatter me, y/n. I'm looking forward to seeing whatever you choose today."

Merlin, it was so hard to stay calm around him when he used such gentlemanly lines and was generally so kind. And good looking... but that was a whole different problem.

"If I can ever find something; I've been looking all afternoon. Maybe I should've asked you to help me, after all. Sorry I didn't consider your fashion expertise," I chuckled, lightening the mood between us.

At that, he straightened up his posture a bit, cocking his head to the side.

"I'll accept that apology on one condition."

"Hmm?" I mused, not actually intending for my apology to be genuine. "What are you talking about?"

His weight shifted to one side, looking calm and collected in his typical charming fashion.

"Well, I'm a little offended you didn't ask me to accompany you shopping," he smirked playfully. "But I'll forgive your negligence if you'd allow me to take you to Slughorn's dinner."

Huh?

What exactly did that mean? He couldn't quite "take me" more so than walking me there and perhaps sitting together; this was a school-related dinner party. It wasn't personal at all, and probably wasn't meant to be anything more than Slughorn getting to know some of us.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

His eyes narrowed.

"Whatever you'd like it to mean."

"I don't know, Cedric... I don't want you getting the wrong idea or anything," I tried refusing at first, but he cut me off by shaking his head.

"Allow me to escort you, then. It'd be a pleasure to have you in my company for the evening."

I had to consider my options, but unfortunately I didn't quite have enough time to ponder anything over as, at that moment, Theo sauntered over to us.

"Y/n, hi," Theo greeted, moving to stand shoulder-to-shoulder with me. His body heat from his much taller frame radiated onto me. "Diggory. Didn't expect to see you two here... together."

"Hello, Theodore," Cedric replied, a relaxed look on his face.

Theo's eyes narrowed, his nose scrunching up. I knew him well enough to figure something was wrong with him. The two held polar opposite expressions; Cedric much warmer and Theo colder.

"Waiting for me, y/n?" Theo asked, neck craning down to me but his body staying positioned the same. "Perhaps we ought to head out."

"Not before she accepts my offer," Cedric interjected before I had the chance to speak.

Theo raised an eyebrow. "Offer?"

With both their sets of eyes on me, the panic inside started to bubble up to the surface. I was on the verge of turning him down before Theo interrupted, but then I felt like I had to say something just to end the conversation. I had no time to come up with some convincing excuse to turn him down gently.

"It's not like it's a marriage proposal, y/n. Say you'll let me take you," Cedric chuckled.

Merlin, I'm glad it's not.

"Uh, I— I," I stammered, "well, I suppose it couldn't hurt..."

The grin on his face widened and he brushed some loose strands of hair off his forehead, looking handsome as ever. As much as I hated to admit it, I still felt butterflies when he did that.

"I'll come by around 6:45. I look forward to it," he beamed. "Until then, I'll leave you be."

"I... I'll see you, Cedric," I replied, a little deflated but hopefully he couldn't tell with how happy he looked.

After an awkward goodbye between the boys, Cedric sauntered out of the shop, leaving Theo and I together. I could tell from the look on his face that he was upset; and he hardly ever got upset with me.

"Care to explain what that spiel was about? I leave you and Daphne alone for one second and you go off making dates with Diggory?" Theo interrogated, moving so that he stood across from me to stare me dead in the eye.

"It's not a date! He's just taking me to the Slug Club dinner!"

"Like that's any better?"

"Look, Theo, I don't really know what happened! I was trying to say no but—"

"That didn't sound like a 'no' to me!"

"You interrupted! I was close to turning him down, I swear... I just— it all went wrong..."

Theo looked like he started to speak again, but cut himself off by sighing loudly.

One of his hands was holding his silky garment bag, but the other one ran a hand through his shaggy brown hair. The curls promptly fell back over his forehead in a messy yet boyishly handsome way that well complimented his blue eyes. As upset as they looked, his eyes had that bright look of his I always loved.

"Listen, y/n, I know you have feelings for the guy. Really, anyone can see it, and I can't blame you for feeling that way. But I think you have to start being a little more careful."

"Careful?" I echoed, my eyebrows knitting together. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Careful like not being escorted by Cedric 'pretty-boy' Diggory somewhere that anyone could make up rumors that you two are together. The Hufflepuff party after the quidditch game was bad enough, but this is worse since it's a dinner."

"Who would say that? It's just the Slug Club."

"Y/n, you don't see the way he looks at you. Worst of all, you don't see the way you look at him."

Was it that obvious? I thought only Theo and Daphne could figure out my unresolved feelings for him, but maybe it was more blatant than I assumed.

"Not only that," Theo continued, "but I'm sure a lot of the people at the dinner party don't even know you two have broken up. What with all the time you spend together, you may as well still be together."

"That can't be true," I shook my head. "I think it's pretty clear we're not together."

"Is it? Then don't go with him to that dinner. Make it more clear."

"Theo, I can't just say no, I've already accepted and I'll be there anyway..."

"Then I'll take you. Tell Diggory that you already said yes to me and it just slipped your mind."

That would've worked, except for the fact that I just told Cedric that Theo and I aren't together. That would only fuel his suspicions even more, and I'd look like a liar or just an idiot for forgetting.

"I don't think that'll work," I sighed. "I'm just going to have to go."

"Y/n, you're really starting to piss me off."

"Theo, I swear, I'm just going to have to endure it."

"Why? Just make something up that we already planned I'm your escort—"

"Can't do that, Theo. I'm sorry, you're absolutely right in this case. I'll do better for next time."

He raised an eyebrow and looked down at me, unamused.

"I'm not the one you'll need to apologize to."

———

"Was it really necessary for you to try on dresses for two hours?" Theo groaned, running a hand through his hair.

"I haven't dragged you along for something like this in forever, Theo. Plus, I helped you pick something out weeks ago," I retorted, causing him to roll his eyes.

"But you didn't come into the store with me! I just asked you to pick through a catalog. Not the same thing."

"Too bad," I tried to sound more joking, but Theo looked genuinely annoyed.

In fact, he had the entire time.

I was sure it was because of the whole Cedric incident, but Theo had been in a mood the whole time I tried on dresses. Every time I stepped out of the changing room it was a "fine" or "it looks good", nothing of substance. His mind was clearly elsewhere, hardly focused on me at all, and when he did actually respond something, it was snarky and with attitude.

I wasn't used to Theo acting like that; he and I were always such close friends that we never argued or been overly moody around each other.

By the time we were entering the Slytherin common room, Theo looked so tired (and generally irritated) that I almost felt embarrassed to walk in with him. I didn't want to look like I was the reason, although I knew deep down, I was.

"Where have you two been?" Blaise asked, sitting on the couch with a quill and stack of parchment in his lap.

"Y/n forced me to tag along on some girly dress haul," Theo cringed, tossing his garment bag on the couch.

"Meanwhile I've had to endure his complaining like a child for the past two hours," I glared at him, sitting next to him on the couch.

"All that and you just picked a basic black cocktail dress," he shifted in his seat.

Did he just scoot away from me?

Merlin, I knew he was upset, but this upset? Have some class.

I turned to look at him, fed up with his demeanor. He was slumped in his seat, looking as pissed off as ever.

"Theo, what's your problem? If you have something to say, just say it."

He looked back at me, his usually cool blue eyes looking more fiery, like he had a passion behind him.

"I have said something... I've been saying something, but you don't want to acknowledge it! All day I've been saying, even before then I've warned you!"

"It's not your problem! Leave me to deal with it myself and stop having such an attitude!"

"Guys, I think you should cool off," Blaise interjected. "Whatever the problem, it's not the right place whatever—"

"You haven't heard what she's done now," Theo turned his head to look at Blaise. "Going off and making public dates with her lover—"

"It's not a date, Theo! Merlin, even if it was, couldn't you mind your own business?"

Blaise had a disgusted look on his face. His eyebrows were scrunched together, nose crinkled and lip sneering. He and I never were the best of friends, but since he was close with Theo we usually were polite or decent acquaintances. He'd never been necessarily upset with me, though.

"You've done what?" he raised his voice. "Y/n, please tell me Theo's just bullshitting."

"He is! He's making it a bigger deal—"

"No I'm not! You don't understand what you've done— how he's going to feel— Merlin, just forget it. Fuck, I can't stand to be around you right now, y/n."

With that, Theo stormed off, presumably to his dorm. I huffed and slumped in my seat, crossing my arms over my chest and trying to calm myself down.

"Tell me you don't believe him, Blaise. We all know Theo can talk a lot of trash when he's upset."

Blaise narrowed his eyes, looking cross with me like Theo, but almost darker. Theo had more of a boyish annoyance, whereas Blaise looked genuinely displeased.

"I'm going to go and try to calm him down. For your sake, y/n, I hope you're right. But if you're not... you have no idea what shit you've gotten yourself into."

I was left with my mouth gaping open, eyes following Blaise as he followed the path that Theo had just gone.

Left by myself, I sat and considered the events that just took place, but more importantly everything that led up to this point. I felt the emotions of everything start to bubble up and come to the surface.

My feelings for Cedric, versus the fact that I knew I should have said no, even if Theo interrupted us. I should still go back and say no, but the way I feel about him won't allow me to do that. Mixed with the fact it seems both of my best friends are annoyed with me, I started to come to terms with the gravity of the situation.

When push comes to shove, I wanted to say yes. So I did. Even if it was wrong.

I knew better, but my own personal feelings got in the way, and I kept letting them. That was the real problem: wanting what I can't have.

I looked around the room, which was filled with students a moment ago, now completely vacant. Probably during our little argument they all left, not wanting to get involved.

Admittedly, it wasn't the best idea or best setting to do it, but seeing as I was already alone and was dealing with everything going on, I decided to do the only thing that my body was willing to do. I let it all out.

In the faint distance, I could hear some shouting coming from the boy's dorms. My guess was Theo and Blaise, but I couldn't be bothered to figure it out.

The more and more I thought about how all of it was self-inflicted and how it could've been avoided if I just did something, made it all worse. I let myself get close to Cedric, I let the rumors about us start, I let my feelings for him grow, I didn't stop his advances. I wasn't in denial about how it was all my fault, and I deserved to feel this shitty over it.

I still stuck by the fact that going to the Slug Club wasn't a date, but that wasn't the point. Theo was right; it didn't matter about the dinner, it was the fact I said yes when I should've had the self control to say no, despite my own desires. I should've had that same self control to not let myself get close to him when I wasn't over him yet.

Fuck.

I sat there on the couch, crying to myself, for Merlin knows how long. My knees were pressed against my chest, feeling my face hot with redness despite the cool tears that were streaming down my face. It was the way I tracked how long I sat there; how many tear stains I had on my cheeks or those that dripped onto my shirt.

Drip, drip, I wiped my cheek. Drip, drip.

I was sat like that, continuing that same pattern, for a considerable amount of time before I felt the weight of the couch shift.

I raised my head up from my knees, my neck starting to hurt from being craned down.

My eyes were watery, slick with tears, but I made out the blurry figure of a platinum-haired boy sitting right next to me. He was just a couple inches away from me, and had an arm extended on the couch behind me, the other reaching out for mine, urging me closer to him.

"Hey, hey, y/n, what's the matter?" he pulled me into his arms, his long limbs wrapping loosely around me.

"Draco, you shouldn't be here right now..." I choked out between fits of tears.

"Shh, just tell me what's wrong," he cooed. His voice was softer than I'd heard it before, like his words were trying to caress me from the outside in. He spoke with a certain gentleness that I couldn't pinpoint; it was like a close friend, packed with care and fragility.

I wiped away some tears welling in the ducts that were messing with my vision. As I did so, his appearance came into greater focus. His face was busy with concern, with his eyes softened and brows tugged together, causing wrinkles to appear on his forehead.

I cleared my throat before choking out a response. "It's not— I can't tell... I don't want to talk about it."

Between my erratic breathing and tears still flowing, he definitely got the hint that I wasn't going to be saying anything. While that was true that I physically wouldn't be able to articulate it, I also didn't want to. If Theo was furious enough, he could do it himself. I wasn't going to be the one to do it, even if I should be.

"Oh... okay," he coughed. "Don't say anything then."

He promptly shifted so that he was the slightest bit closer to me and moved his hand up to my head to gently guide me to his shoulder.

"Is this... okay?" he breathed out, his voice slightly quivering at the end.

My head found a place in the crook of his neck in response as I tried to control myself. I nodded, not quite able to force out the words. He let out a sigh when I did so, moving ever the slightest bit closer to me.

His hand stayed at my head, softly caressing my hair and smoothing it while whispering words of affirmation that I couldn't make out; they all sounded like white noise. Still, it was comforting. I didn't need to know what he was saying to know the meaning of it.

His other arm wrapped around my body to my back, keeping me in place close to him. He rubbed up and down my back, his large hand spanning over a lot of area at once. Through my shirt, I could feel how cold his skin was, like always. The occasional bump of his rings against me made it a bit colder, but I felt warmed from the inside out.

Maybe it was a combination of the words he was saying, whatever they were, or the feeling of his arms around me, or just him being there, but I felt soothed.

"Draco," I huffed, once my tears had calmed a bit. I raised my head up to look at him, ever so close to his face.

"Wh— what is it?" he mumbled, eyes boring into mine. They were void of the usual color they held, graying themselves out. I could feel the cool and minty breath escaping his lips pressing against my skin.

"When did you get here? How did you—"

"Shh, y/n," he cooed, pulling my head back to rest in the crook of his neck again. "Don't worry about it."

"I just, thought I was alone. Everyone had left..."

He paused for a moment. I could see his adam's apple bob up and down as he swallowed hard, before leaning his head down to rest on top of mine. An audible sigh emerged from his mouth before replying.

"Theo came up, angry like all hell broke loose. He said you two had a fight."

"B—but, you two are roommates, aren't you?"

"Yeah. We are."

"You didn't stay there with him?"

The hand he had smoothing my hair dropped slightly. His cold fingers ran down my neck, to the crook between my neck and shoulder, then back up again. His index and middle fingers, adorned with icy rings pressing against me, seemed to linger on my skin the slightest bit longer than the others. He traced little patterns, ones I couldn't make out, if they even were patterns.

"Had more important things to attend to."

Chapter Text

"I still can't believe you said yes to him," Daphne uttered while brushing out a section of my hair. I was sat down in front of the vanity in our room and she was standing behind me, trying to make my hair look more presentable for the evening.

"It was a temporary lapse in judgment," I defended myself while brushing on some powder to my face.

"A lapse in judgment that ended up with you having a public date with Cedric."

"For the hundredth time, it's not a date. He even said it can just be an escort and us spending the evening together. Totally... cordial... no romance at all."

Daphne rolled her eyes. "It starts out with just dinner, then he invites you for a walk in the courtyard, then he kisses you in the moonlight, then before you know it you're back at his room and—"

"Daphne!" I cut her off, actually earning a laugh from her.

"Sorry, y/n, I got carried away there. Still, you know what I mean. Just be careful? You don't need Draco finding out about this."

"What's to find out? That he and I, along with a group of other students in our year, all got together to meet for dinner with a professor? There's nothing wrong with that."

"Weren't you supposed to be on prefect patrol tonight?"

"Cedric got someone to cover it. Quite a few of us are going to the Slug Club, so," I muttered, a bit quieter. I added some blush to the apples of my cheeks to bring back some color; I was looking a tad washed out.

"Cedric this, Cedric that," she tugged on my hair rather harshly, causing me to yelp out in pain. She chuckled mischievously. "Did that hurt? Oops."

"Ouch, Daph, way out of line," I brought my hand to the back of my head to rub the soreness away. It only hurt for a second, but still.

"You kind of deserve it after playing with everyone's feelings this way," she shrugged.

"Cedric is a nonfactor, okay? And to set the record straight, I am positive that Draco feels nothing—"

Before I could finish my thought, I was cut off by a tapping at the door. It was quick but not heavy-handed. Tap tap tap tap tap. In fact, it was quite light and almost like someone had been knocking with just one finger... or a stick maybe?

"Sounds like loverboy's here," Daphne whispered lowly, giving me something of a glare.

Merlin, I'd have to deal with her later. She's been in such a mood lately. Not that I could blame her, I'd been so busy we hardly had any friend time together, but still. She could try helping and not exacerbating the situation.

I gave her a look of acknowledgement before getting up to answer the door.

Much to my surprise, Cedric wasn't there. In fact, nobody was there. It was actually a small black box on the floor and an owl next to it. I bent down to pick up the box and the owl flitted away. I had no idea whose owl it was (but I really never paid any attention to that). It was quite large and had bright orange eyes that seemed to examine mine, as well as a giant wingspan as I saw it soar down the corridor and away from my doorstep.

With the box in hand, I turned back to face Daphne and held up it up quizzically. When she realized what was going on, she rushed over and inspected it.

"What's this? Some jewelry box?" She mused, taking it out of my grasp and holding it up to the light. Closer to the lamp, we could tell it wasn't actually black, but a very dark, Slytherin-like green. Actually, almost too dark to be Slytherin.

"Looks like it," I replied, snatching the box back from her. "It has my name on it, thank you very much."

She rolled her eyes. "Go on and open it. Maybe you've got another secret admirer... you would."

Ignoring her slight dig, I gently opened the box to reveal a gorgeous gold necklace. It had a diamond crescent moon in the center with golden stars hanging off...

Wait. Had I seen this before? It looked awfully familiar.

I took it out of the box and held it up closer to the lamp on my vanity. I had definitely seen this before.

But where? I never went out jewelry shopping really... if I saw it somewhere, I would've bought it.

Except when I went shopping with Theo. That was months ago, though.

"It's very pretty," Daphne gawked. "Whoever sent this has good taste."

"Daph, check if there's a note in there," I ordered, my eyes fixated on the necklace between my fingers.

"Don't mind if I do," she perked up, always interested in the drama.

Given it was a very tiny box, we probably would've seen a note if there was one. However, once she pulled out the holder of where the necklace was secured, there was indeed a slip of paper behind.

She handed it to me and we swapped what we were holding. I took the parchment and brought it up to look at it.

The handwriting wasn't quite perfect calligraphy, it looked a tad messy or naturally masculine. Yet, the short lines were neat and straight; the strokes of the quill were thin and almost elegant, not like some people whose ink splatters all over the page.

"'The brightness of your cheek would shame the stars.'

Wear them around your neck instead, my love."

My eyes darted back to the necklace she was holding and my gaze lingered on the stars that were attached to the same clasp as the moon. They were smaller, yet still as pretty and a bit shinier, if anything.

"That first line... it's from some muggle play; we learned about it in Muggle Studies, remember?" Daphne offered up. "What was his name? Wordsworth or something?"

I shook my head. "It was Shakespeare."

"All the same. Now if only we had a name to attach to this..."

My mind scrambled itself. "It couldn't be Theo, maybe? I was with him when I first saw this."

Her eyes widened. "Theo?! Y/n, it can't be. He's Draco's best friend, there's no way he would be wooing you over with expensive gifts; he must know it's a lost cause."

"Who else would it be then? He was the only person I told that I liked this... and I haven't been back at that shop in months, I think?"

She shrugged. "I mean, it could be, but I don't think so. I can't see him risking getting into hot water with Draco just to give you a necklace, especially with such romantic undertones."

She did have a point there. Especially since I never even considered Theo might like me; it was always strictly platonic between us and we were both content with that.

Well, barring our latest argument which had us pretty much at odds with each other, we were platonic friends. He hadn't spoken to me since. I couldn't quite blame him either, I knew he was pissed off and needed time to recoup. This, however, was not the way to apologize, if he was planning to do so.

But if not Theo, then who else?

"I suppose you're right. It could just be a coincidence, it is pretty after all. But if that's the case, it still doesn't answer who sent it?"

At that, a knock at the door was heard. An actual knock. It was gentle and rhythmic, but not the tapping of an owl like minutes ago. Knock, knock, pause, knock.

I shoved the box and note into Daphne's hand, not wanting Cedric to see it, and went to answer the door.

I slowly swung it open to see Cedric standing there, looking devastatingly handsome.

He had on a preppy (but not obnoxiously pretentious) sweater with a dress shirt underneath that peaked through on top from the collar and at his wrists where the sweater ended. The dark slacks and dress shoes he was wearing made him look tall and lean; it was enough to make me want to keep him at the doorway and just stare at him the whole night.

The more neutral, non-distracting colors of his clothes made the highlights of his styled honey-brown hair look more golden and accentuated the blue of his eyes to shine brighter.

Merlin, it was hard to not throw myself at him right then and there.

"My, my, you look wonderful, y/n," he smiled, teeth shining white as he stood up a tad straighter. His eyes scanned me up and down for a moment before locking back onto mine respectfully. He then bent down to place a kiss on both sides of my cheeks which I returned as a greeting.

"Thank you, Cedric... you look great, too," I did my best to plaster on a smile as if I didn't have a swarm of thoughts flooding my mind.

He cocked his head to the side and waved to my best friend behind me. "Daphne, always a pleasure to see you. It's a shame you're not joining us this evening," he greeted her.

I noticed a blush tint her cheeks as she walked closer to stand next to me. He had that effect on people.

"Nice to see you too, Ced. It's no big deal, I have plans tonight anyway. Hope you two enjoy rubbing elbows with the rich and snobby tonight," she jested.

"Daph, most of them are our friends."

"Doesn't make them any less rich and snobby. Now Diggory, treat her right... keep your hands to yourself... she's my little girl and I want her back by midnight, understood young man?"

He held up his hands defensively as he chuckled. "I'll be a perfect gentleman, sir. Are you ready, y/n? We can head over whenever you'd like."

"Yeah, sure. Just let me grab my purse—"

"Don't forget your necklace!" Daphne urged, pulling me away from Cedric for a moment.

I lowered my voice to a hush, glaring seriously. "What? Why would you say—"

"Might as well find out if it's from him as soon as possible," she deadpanned, turning me around and clasping the necklace with some wandless magic. It was much faster than doing it by hand, I'd admit.

"Daphne, I don't think—"

"She's all yours, Diggory!" she nudged me back to the doorway before throwing me my purse that sat on my bed. "Like I said, midnight. Not a second later."

Cedric laughed boyishly before bidding her goodbye. I felt like I was being thrown about between the two of them, the only problem being that Cedric had no idea what was going on.

I was dreading walking down the Slytherin dorm rooms and through the common room to get back to main corridors of the school, but luckily since it was Friday, most Slytherins were out on the town or too busy to loiter in the common room. I felt a wave of relief wash over me once we made it through only being seen by a few lower years who surely wouldn't tattle.

There was the issue that I'd be seen by everyone at the Slug Club... especially Blaise and Theo. I felt anxiety bubbling up inside me at the prospect of this somehow getting back to Draco or—

"You okay, y/n? You look a little... frazzled," Cedric asked, voice laced with concern.

I took a deep breath in and tried to relax myself. Come on, y/n, don't make it so obvious.

"Of course, thank you for asking," I plastered on a smile to sate his curiosity. I doubt it worked.

"Right," he nodded, but something told me he was just trying to make me comfortable. "And if I wasn't clear enough earlier, you really do look stunning."

The rest of the walk there consisted of small talk; nothing too important. He made a few remarks about the dress I was wearing, how pretty it was or how it was perfect for the event, and I forced myself to let out a few similar compliments about how classy he looked and he'd be the most sophisticated gentleman there. I wasn't lying; I'm sure he would be battling for best dressed (rather, best looking) of all the boys there. It just wasn't at the forefront of my mind while I felt the metal of the necklace pressed against my skin, making it the only thing I could concentrate on.

Upon reaching the party (which was really Slughorn's classroom that he magically transformed into a grand looking dining room), I was struck by just how all out Sluggy went for this. The decorations, the food, even a few elves from the kitchens to bring the food out could be spotted running in and out. It was very elegant, and I could tell these must be the ghosts of Slughorn's elitist socialite past coming out to play. Old habits die hard.

Everyone there was styled similarly to us. The girls had on modest yet sophisticated dresses or sweaters while the guys all had some type of dress shirt and slacks. My suspicions were confirmed after viewing everyone; it was definitely a toss-up between whether Cedric or Theo was easiest on the eyes out of the boys. The only problem was Theo seemed to have a malicious sneer on his face as opposed to Cedric's warm smile, which meant the latter was definitely the winner.

Speaking of which, Theo was second only to Slughorn to speak with us when we stepped in. Slughorn was jolly as ever; it was honestly a refreshing change of pace to the otherwise glum or confusing emotions I'd felt lately.

Slughorn had made a sort of sitting/drawing area that was meant for some socializing before dinner, which I used to chat with Cedric, then Theo and Blaise who made their way over.

"Fancy seeing the both of you here... again," Theo sipped from his glass of wine. His eyes were fixated on me more than Cedric, however.

"Theo..." I slightly glared at him, hoping to elicit a better reaction.

"Nice to see you, Theodore. And you as well, Zabini," Cedric grinned, his usually gleeful self.

"Nice sweater, Diggory. Heading to the frat house after dinner?" Zabini snorted.

I nudged him, growing to despise their distasteful banter. It was so unlike them... especially Theo. I thought he liked Cedric? He'd even told me a few times that he thought he was a decent guy, despite them not necessarily being friends.

Cedric, however, always turned the other cheek. He seemed totally unbothered.

"If I'm in the company of this gorgeous young lady here, I don't mind where I'm headed," he smiled.

At that, I couldn't hide the blush on my face. It was so gracious of him to turn a snide comment into a flirty remark that he knew I'd like. I let out a soft laugh to mask the flush of my cheeks.

When he noticed my reaction, a small scowl grew on Blaise's lips. "Ever the charmer, Diggory. It's incredible how you manage to keep so many girls' hearts on a string."

"Especially the ones who have no business paying you any attention," Theo added.

"Could you really not have found another date?"

"Any girl in here would've been keen to accept from 'golden boy' Diggory. You just had to choose y/n?""

"Guys, that's enough," I deadpanned, instinctively scooching closer to Cedric before looking up at him. "I'm so sorry, Ced, I don't know what's gotten into them."

I noticed Cedric stiffen up a bit, perhaps at the contact I was giving him but more likely from the subtle attacks he was getting from Theo and Blaise. He looked unthreatened, however, just a little tense. It was clear that the two Slytherin boys were attempting to appear domineering, but Cedric wasn't taking part.

"No need to apologize, y/n," he looked down at me before peering back at Blaise and Theo. "Not quite the compliment I was expecting, but if you boys need any tips on wooing the ladies, I might find the time to give you a few pointers."

Blaise and Theo exchanged looks, their nostrils flaring and eyes sharp. Cedric on the other hand appeared a tad smug, however otherwise unaffected. Actually, the lopsided grin he donned was attractive.

"It's not us who needs the help," Blaise glared before the two Slytherin boys walked off to discuss among themselves. I took note of the dirty looks they sent our way.

"Ced, I promise I'll have a chat with Theo later and ask him to lay off, he was way out of line there," I sighed, frustrated. "He's been a pain for a few days now."

"Don't stress," he grinned. "Don't spend a minute worrying about those two. They like causing trouble."

"I know, but Theo always said he liked you and I don't know what's gotten into him—"

"Shh, darling," he cooed, pulling me in for a warm hug, arms wrapping loosely around my waist. "I've handled much worse before; I can deal with a flip of Nott's attitude for you."

He pulled away slightly, arms still clinging onto me and looked into my eyes. My hands were on his upper chest, being warmed up by the heat he radiated. Everything about him was soothing, especially that smirk he offered up, but not out of malice. It was to try and make me comfortable again after our run-in with the boys, to cheer me up.

A small smile grew on my lips, causing him to smirk a little more.

"Now, we're going to have fun tonight, because we both earned a place here, got it? Chatting up the professor, eating great food, and bragging about all your accomplishments because you deserve it. You're not going to let those snakes ruin your night."

"Hey, just because they're Slytherins doesn't make them snakes," I chuckled.

"You're right, but them being themselves makes them snakes."

He pressed a soft kiss to my right temple, sending shivers down my neck and spine to where his hand rested on the curve of my back.

I leaned into him and his touch. I was still grappling with my being here with him, and after Theo and Blaise made a big deal out of it, I knew it was wrong. However, that didn't mean it felt wrong. Cedric had some magic charm to him that made everything seem alright. Even if I knew it wasn't right, he made me relax and find solace in him.

I couldn't let this go on forever; it would end soon. Might as well soak it all in while I can.

Chapter Text

The Slug Club had its ups and downs. Mostly downs.

Seeing as there were lots of different students from houses or areas of interest I never indulged in, it was almost nice hearing the backgrounds of different students or their accomplishments to earn them places at the table.

Funnily enough, I was actually most intrigued to hear about Harry. He and Slughorn made good conversation, and I was impressed by how he managed to juggle so many of his activities. Granger was more tolerable than usual, but her muggle jokes didn't quite land and I didn't find them overly funny or interesting for that matter. Actually, she in general wasn't too funny or interesting. At least Harry made up for the fascinating features she lacked.

Cedric and Slughorn made excellent chat, as well. Sluggy, a known socialite type who always was looking for connections, was interested in asking about the Diggory Minister of Magic from some years ago. His family's kept a large role in the ministry for a long time and it was safe to say that Cedric was on the path to make the Diggory name proud. It sounded like Slughorn was banking on Cedric being someone he could call on for a social or business link someday.

Despite a few snide comments from Blaise and Theo who seemed determined to bash Cedric, even they couldn't downplay his accomplishments with a "half-blood" insult slyly thrown about. They certainly tried, though. More than once they caught themselves almost slipping in "mudblood", but stopped before it went too far. I know Cedric noticed, too.

I'd heard some rumors about Slughorn being a bit of a pureblood supremacist, but I couldn't quite tell over the course of the conversation. Sure, he invited Granger, a muggle-born, and seemed to tolerate her chat enough, but he didn't make any effort to stop or even disapprove of the obvious anti-muggle born rhetoric thrown about by Blaise or Theo. He didn't even bat a lash when Blaise suggested Cedric might be unworthy of a Ministry position with a mother coming from a muggle background.

Other students spoke with Slughorn as well, all with some famous ancestry or academic notoriety. It was like some high society gathering where everyone rubbing elbows was trying to see who could show off the most. That's not to say it was a boring evening, but being in such luxurious company got tiresome. I could only hear that someone's grandfather invented a potion or uncle was a ministry politician so many times.

"And your family, Miss Vitelli?" Slughorn finally turned his attention to me, notably last. "I'm ashamed to say I haven't been making many of your functions since the passing of your grandfather."

"If you've met them once, you've met them a thousand times," I tried to joke, earning a smile from Slughorn. "They all send their best."

"You've seen them recently?"

"Yes; I've just gotten back from a ball hosted by my parents a couple weeks back."

"How lovely," he sipped his drink. "I remember how well your family could throw a party. Hours and hours into the night and early morning of fine wine, dancing... such sophistication."

As much as I appreciated the compliment, I wasn't interested in flaunting my family's fortune in front of the group, despite the fact many of them were more than well-off themselves. I could leave that to Blaise and Cormac, if they so wished.

"I'm sure you're welcome back anytime for another," I plastered on a smile. "My parents and I would love to have you."

He cocked an eyebrow. "I might take you up on that offer, Miss Vitelli. Oh, how I miss a good Italian festival. When might the next shin-dig be?"

"Christmas Eve, I'd presume," I took a bite of my food. I felt the eyes of Theo and presumably Blaise on me.

"Ah, yes! I've been to a few of your grandfather's Christmas Eve parties many years ago. Always a great show, you put on for the holiday. I'll be sure to be in attendance this year."

"Won't it be a joint party this year?" Theo asked from across the table, interrupting our conversation.

I craned my neck to look at him. Merlin, he was lucky he had his good looks, otherwise he'd be nothing more than a massive pain tonight.

"Is it really?" Slughorn asked, turning his attention to the pureblood boy. "What might you be referring to, Mr. Nott?"

Theo stared me dead in the eyes. "The Vitelli's and the Malfoy's have... how shall I say it? Joined forces recently."

Slughorn burst out into some jolly laughter, contrasting from the stares we were giving each other. "Good grief, son, you make it sound like some war alliance. Miss Vitelli, is Mr. Nott here correct?"

I was forced to look back at Slughorn, awkwardly smiling to alleviate some tension I had building up inside me.

"I, uh... my parents and the Malfoy's are... close, these days. I wouldn't be surprised if they came, as well."

Slughorn bobbed his head up and down in acknowledgement. "Hopefully Lucius doesn't find it offensive that young Draco isn't here, then. A good student, he is, but... something of a troublemaker. Regardless, it'll be a lovely evening, I'm sure."

"I'll be happy to see you there, professor. My father and I always drop by for the party," Theo smirked.

"How splendid! No wonder you and Miss Vitelli are such good workmates in class. It's no doubt that close families make close friends."

As Slughorn babbled on something about the Malfoy family, Theo had a smug smirk playing on his lips. His eyes occasionally raked down to my neck and landed on the moon and stars charms I had, which only made him smirk more.

I could rule out that Theo sent the necklace, then. He seemed full-on supporting this marriage with Draco, which surprised me since months ago he seemed to be quite the opposite.

It was like my feelings didn't matter anymore to him. What had gotten into him? I know that first and foremost, he was Draco's friend, and I accepted that. However, that didn't mean he stopped being my friend. He always said I could confide in him, but that was out of the question now that he's been so unsupportive of my feelings or wants.

Like hell I'd be speaking to him anytime soon.

Juxtaposing Nott's attitude, Cedric beside me seemed... unnerved. He gave me an awkward smile that didn't meet his eyes, lips thinly pressed together and his cheeks lightly pink with a blush. His shoulders were tense, which was a good representation of how he looked overall.

Tense.

———

"Galleon for your thoughts?" I asked Cedric as we ended the slow walk back to the dungeons. He was nice enough to walk me back to my room, which I was lucky enough that again we weren't spotted heading to the girl's dormitories.

"Keep your galleon," he shrugged dismissively.

"If it's any consolation, I thought you were fantastic tonight. More so than usual," I tried to put a smile on his face, like he had done for me earlier.

"The same to you."

"Cedric, it's unlike you to be so quiet. You have been since dessert was served. You hardly spoke even when Slughorn gave out drinks after dinner."

"I'm not much of a drinker."

"You know what I mean," I shook my head. Although our pace was slow as it was, I stopped in my tracks and grabbed his forearm, causing him to turn back and look at me. "Shall we sit and talk?"

His eyes sheepishly looked up to meet mine. He didn't respond, but nodded slowly.

I hadn't planned on him coming in tonight, but it looked like he needed it. Daphne was out with some friends anyway despite her jokes from earlier, so the room was empty. I brought him to the edge of my bed and sat down a few inches from him.

"You started out the night so confident... you told me yourself, not to let those 'snakes' get you down. What changed?"

He ran a hand through his perfect hair, tousling it so that even when messy, it still looked attractive. I didn't know how that was possible.

"Do as I say, not as I do," he lamely forced a chuckle. It was obviously insincere.

"Still, you're not one to let those guys... Theo Nott or Blaise Zabini of all people upset you. You had everything going for you tonight."

"Y/n, we both know the only thing I had going for me tonight was you."

I knitted my eyebrows instinctively, not necessarily uncomfortable, but it was a suggestion I didn't want to realize tonight.

"That's not true, Ced. You got invited to the Slug Club on your own merit. I had nothing to do with it."

"But they were only harassing me because you were there with me. Any other night, any other girl I would've gone with, they would've left me alone. They said so themselves."

"That still doesn't explain your shift in behavior. You were so confident in yourself for so long... what changed? I actually... liked how you weren't paying them any attention."

His eyes met mine. They held a sort of sorrow that I didn't quite place till now.

"Them being jealous, I can handle. I know Nott must have a thing for you, and that's fine, really. What I can't handle is him suggesting I'm not good enough for you. I know my pockets aren't nearly as deep as theirs, but I thought I could... make you happy, still. Even if I'm not some wealthy pureblood bloke like either of them."

What? Had Cedric gone mad? Everything he just said was factually incorrect. There was no way Theo was interested in me, but there was also no way he wasn't, in theory, good enough for me. Especially since I didn't care about his blood status or how rich his family was... the reality was, it was just my family that cared about that.

If it weren't for my marriage, he and I'd still be together.

Fuck, this is my fault. If I told him months ago why we had to break up... he wouldn't feel this way.

"Cedric... I mean this with total sincerity: you're good enough for me. If anything, you're too good for me. Never think for a second that you aren't, just because of some superficial reason like blood status or inheritance."

He shook his head. "No, no, you're just saying that. I didn't want to tell you, because I didn't want your pity—"

"It's not pity!" I reached out to grab his arm, the sudden contact forcing him to look at me again. "I've been less than honest with you in the time we've spent together lately. That makes me the problem, not you."

He raised his eyebrows, looking at me quizzically. "What are you talking about?"

"I— it's a lot to explain... you'd be disappointed in me if you knew the truth."

"Y/n, I could never be disappointed in you. For Merlin's sake, I'm so bloody in love with you, it doesn't change a thing what you've done."

My breath hitched with an audible gasp. Don't say that. For the love of all that is good and holy, do not say that. We both know it, and we both know I felt the same way for him. Felt. Did I still? It was obvious I was still interested and attracted to him, but I hadn't really considered if I was still in love with him necessarily.

He reached out his hand to take mine in his, likely noticing how much I was trembling by that point. I couldn't choke out any words to say, or even string together words in my minds worthy enough of hearing. The poor boy had just re-confessed his love for me and I couldn't think of anything to respond.

We both knew he loved me, whether or not he said anything. It was obvious. Merlin, why did he have to say it? I was fine with avoiding it till now.

"Y/n?" he mused, rubbing his thumb over my hand in a soothing manner. His touch was warm, like always. Inviting.

I forced myself to snap back into reality with a harsh blink, suddenly feeling a bit dizzy. Not dizzy in the sense that I was faint or the room was spinning, but more so that I couldn't concentrate on what my own brain was thinking.

My eyes fixated back on his soft blue ones, looking at me wide with some of the most love and genuine adoration I'd seen in months from anyone.

"Cedric, I..." I managed to choke out, before feeling my throat go dry.

"Shh, shh, it's okay," he cooed, noticing my lack of a response. His thumb continued to trace patterns over my skin, now ripe with goosebumps. "You don't have to say anything."

"No, I do," I shook my head. "I can't just... leave you with nothing."

His eyes bore into mine. I could tell he was wanting something of substance, even if he didn't say it.

"No, let me apologize... I, shouldn't have said that. I feel it, I really do, but it slipped out of frustration. I genuinely didn't intend on making you uncomfortable... I never even planned on admitting that."

"You haven't made me uncomfortable or anything..."

"I haven't? Then what's the matter?"

He took my other hand in his free one so that he was now grasping onto both of mine. I'd admit, the contact was nice, I liked it, especially from him. It gave me the same butterflies I was so used to getting from him, ones that made me want to move closer and let him envelop me in his strong arms then kiss away all my anxieties.

But how could I let that happen?

To be fair, nothing between us was necessarily going on, but I couldn't let us go down the track we had so desperately started. If he already admitted his love for me, this could only definitively end in two ways: I tell him I want him too, or tell him I don't and we fall into the same cycle of him chasing me and not moving on. Or the necessary third option: cut off contact with him altogether.

"This... it won't work," I breathed out, my voice lowered to a hush.

"Look, y/n, I know we broke up over the summer, and if you want nothing to do with me, I can take it like a man. But if there's even a sliver of hope that you might still want me... I'll take whatever chance I can get."

"No, Cedric, it's not that—"

"Then what is it? I can tell the way you've been acting, it's obvious you still feel something. Maybe you don't love me like I love you, and that's fine, I can work with that. But you do feel something. I wouldn't be trying so hard if I didn't sense it."

He was right.

There was no denying the truth of the matter, that I had feelings for him, but I was always aware of that. The real question was whether or not I was willing to risk a secret relationship with him, or even just confess that I was married? I had to at least do the latter.

"You know that's true," I started, "but it's a little more complicated than that."

Cedric rolled his eyes, clearly frustrated. "How could it possibly be complicated?"

Ced... I want you but it's not right to have you...

I couldn't bring myself to verbalize the words my mind had articulated. I was sat like a dog, with my mouth open, nothing coming out. Just huffs of breath escaping my mouth.

When I failed to produce a response, Cedric stood up and paced around, running his hands through his hair and trying to calm down while I did the same. We weren't fighters; if anything, we were the opposite, even in a relationship. We got frustrated, upset, but never angry or yelling at each other. We just needed moments to cool down.

Our fights when we were dating always panned out like this. It was rare that we even fought, but on the off occasion that we did, it was always little frustrations that needed to be aired out. Nothing major, no toxicities, just mature conversation.

He paced up and down my room, until he stopped at my dresser. His eyes were fixated on something I couldn't tell from where I was sitting. His hand reached out for it until he wrapped his fingers around it and held it up to his eyes.

The golden snitch.

"I gave this to you after that game," he breathed out, his fingers running over the intricate designs of the ball. "After the party, I mean."

My eyes shifted between my lap and him holding the snitch. It was increasingly harder to stay focused on him. "It's very pretty. I keep it up by my jewelry for ambience."

His eyes followed back to its original spot before looking back down at it, rolling it from finger to finger.

"I remember how much you wanted one while we were dating. I should've given you one then but... I liked keeping them. Like trophies."

"You can have that one back. Add it to your collection."

He shook his head and placed it back on its holder I made for it. "It's yours. Doesn't look like you have much in here to remember me by anyway."

"Cedric, I could never forget you. I don't need souvenirs as a remembrance."

I gently stood up and took long, agonizingly slow strides over to him. I noticed his breathing change rates when I was close to him, close enough to feel his body heat radiating onto me. His much larger figure would appear domineering usually, but his neck was craned down, almost defeated. His shoulders were slumped, and eyes not willing to meet mine.

I reached a hand out to cup his face, which gently urged him to look at me. His eyes were glassy; not quite teary, but full of emotion. He instinctively nuzzled his cheek into my touch, like he always did, placing a soft, barely noticeable kiss to my palm.

"You know how I feel about you," I managed to breathe out, softer than I'd spoken to him all night.

"That's the thing, y/n," he enveloped my hand with his own larger one, still cupping his cheek, "I really don't. Merlin, how I wish I did... just let me in that pretty head of yours for a minute. Tell me whatever's on your mind so we can figure something out."

Of course, I knew what I had to tell him. Why did this have to be so difficult?

I ran my fingers from around his cheek to down his jaw and neck, softly caressing as much of him as I could take in. His contact was always a source of comfort, but now I noticed the slight tremble of his skin under my touch, the way it reacted with goosebumps or a quiver when my fingers traced little patterns up and down.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you," I shook my head, "but all I can say is that I think it's better if we go our separate ways."

With a quick, sharp turn of his neck, my hand was pulled from his face and he looked to the right, avoiding my gaze and back to the golden snitch resting on my dresser. He seemed to find solace in it.

"How could it be better?" he managed to choke out, his voice shaky like a young boy.

"I- I can't bring myself to say anymore," I looked down myself, not that it would matter, since our eye contact was broken already.

"Fine," he breathed out, straightening his posture so he appeared taller. Merlin, this would be easier if he weren't so handsome. "I'll leave you alone then. Maybe I can stop getting harassed by your other boyfriends then," he scoffed.

I was slightly taken back at that. Cedric was never one to shoot out snide comments, but I let it pass since I knew he was grieving a broken heart. I didn't need to rub salt in the wounds.

"This has nothing to do with Theo. Or Blaise, for that matter," I reached out to touch him again, but he moved back. I couldn't blame that.

"I'd like to believe that, y/n, but I don't know anymore." His eyes looked back up to meet mine, and I couldn't quite make out the feelings of them. Saddened and hurt, but with a twist of frustration that I hadn't noticed before.

"I swear this isn't because I don't have feelings for y—"

"Don't," he cut me off, understandably. "I apologize for my attitude right now, but the last thing I want is some half-hearted excuse."

"I... get that, Ced, but it's not an excuse. If you need time, or—"

"No," he shook his head. "I just... I've got to go. See you aro— nevermind."

With that, I was left standing alone in my dorm room, with not even my own thoughts for company.

The only thing I found solace in was that little note from earlier in the evening.

The brightness of your cheek would shame the stars.

I couldn't say how many times I read it over; I committed the phrase and handwriting to memory. I sat on the edge of my window area, drinking in the bright lights of the night sky, reading that note over in melancholy.

It was fair to rule out two people who'd sent it, then.

I clutched the metal around my neck, now hot with the warmth of my chest pressed against it. I had a sudden want for it to be cold again. Something refreshing, cooling of my nerves.

I took it off and just held it in between my fingertips the rest of the night. I preferred to look at it.

Chapter Text

The subsequent days were kind of a blur.

Well, I said "days", but the haziness I felt probably made it a week or so; I wouldn't have noticed a difference anyway. I was stuck in some odd time continuum of emotions. It was a mixture of heartbreak, longing, and yet... something was relieving.

It was the fact that I didn't have to hide anything now, or feel bad about it. As much as I felt for Cedric, it simply wasn't acceptable that I was entertaining those emotions with him for so long. It's not that I suddenly lost all the feelings I had for him, but I couldn't bring myself to act like I wasn't almost living a double life with him. Going to parties, off to fancy dinners, then going back home and remembering who I actually belonged to.

It was draining, to say the least. The day after, I stayed in bed and didn't leave for anything except what was completely necessary, and on Monday Daphne practically dragged me to my classes, which I paid no attention to. Professor McGonagall even ended up asking if I was feeling alright or needed to take a trip to Madam Pomfrey.

That didn't change the fact I was upset, and as much as I tried to hide it, my friends around me took note. It was too difficult trying to hide any sort of heartache, or at least trying to mask it for extended periods of time.

In addition to Daphne and a few other girls I was friends with, Draco caught on. As much as I wouldn't have wanted him to know, he picked it up during our first prefect patrol since I called things off with Cedric. He noticed I was being unusually quiet and absentminded, and then in classes said I was acting the same.

In addition with the... unfortunate moment we shared in the common room where I cried into his shoulder, he seemed to be very in-tune with my emotions. That, or he had just been walking on eggshells ever since that night, probably wanting to know whatever happened. I never told him, after all.

Regardless, Draco was among the first to know something was wrong.

To make matters more complicated, Draco had been an absolute sweetheart in the time I was grieving. It made me feel all the more guilty for having been with Cedric, but juxtaposing, I also felt more relieved that I ended it. It was strange that I could feel polar ends of the spectrum in terms of emotions, but I told myself that it would be balanced out.

Rather unexpectedly, he seemingly brought it upon himself to make me feel better. The only downside was he badgered me multiple times asking why I wasn't well, but every time he asked I just clammed up and said it was a personal issue. He usually stopped asking after that.

Nonetheless, he indeed did his best to try and raise my otherwise low spirits.

The morning after that prefect patrol, I was greeted with a basket outside my door with specialty breakfast foods he'd asked the house elves to prepare; it even came with an espresso made the way that I showed him at home.

He also warded off Theo and Blaise, who had continued to have quite the attitude like they did the night of the Slug Club. Part of me wanted to walk up to them and tell them that their harassing of Cedric worked, but I was too tired or depressed most days to entertain it.

More than once in that time period since, Draco and I had sat in the Slytherin common room together, silently reading or biding time, and he'd made sure to shoo off the boys before they could make any comments that he feared would upset me further.

He even offered to let me take the night off prefect patrols, just so I could get some more rest at night. However, I refused him on that one, despite knowing full well that he would've found a new partner or doubled the ground covered and done it himself if I wanted him to. I took it upon myself to finish my prefect duties; being around him made it easier. I could tell that he was genuinely trying to make me feel better, and it certainly was working. It was a distraction, at least.

I found myself enjoying our conversations more and more, which he tried to make lighthearted in efforts to raise my spirits. (Mostly) gone was the Draco I knew that sat and sulked, or directed the conversations into more depressive moods. In that short time period, his only focus was making me smile. And he succeeded.

"I have a surprise for you once Binns is done yapping," Draco whispered over to me, his individual desk next to mine.

"You do?" I smiled bashfully, but also feeling the ghost of guilt creep over me. "It's really not necessary—"

"Shh, nonsense," he smirked. "I have a feeling you'll like this one."

"You've been doing too much already, I swear, you don't have to be my personal caretaker."

"You're right," he paused, then lowered his voice again, "I don't have to."

He didn't have to say the rest of it; the "I want to" was implied by the cheeky grin on his face. It wasn't malicious, but more so content with himself or with some sense of self-satisfaction.

He sunk back in his seat, scribbling down some notes on what Professor Binns was wrapping up for this lesson. I noticed Blaise at the front of the class look back at us a few times; it wasn't often that Draco would rather sit with me than him, but I couldn't stop him from snatching up the seat next to mine before class even started. Every time I'd came to class, he'd already been there with a smile on his face. That, unfortunately, left Blaise alone and bitter since Theo refused to take Advanced History of Magic.

Binns usually dozed off around halfway through our lectures, but today actually was finishing the lesson. Very slowly. Nonetheless, it meant all the longer I had to wait for whatever Draco's "surprise" was. Every so often I'd look over at him and he'd shoot me a sly grin; it was almost cute, in a boyish way.

After enduring the longest lecture on Grindelwald (and being assigned an obscenely long essay on the material), I felt a tap on my shoulder as I was putting my books away into my bag.

"Hope you're not planning on stealing Draco away again," I turned to find Blaise standing above me, appearing more domineering than he usually does. "He would do well to make time for his real friends every now and then."

"Shove off, Blaise," Draco yawned, inching closer. "We talked about this already."

Blaise glared down at me before his eyes shot back up to Draco. "Then I trust I'll see you at quidditch, captain."

"What was all that about?" I asked cautiously, my eyes glued to the back of Blaise as he walked out of the room.

"He thinks my mind is... elsewhere, lately," he shrugged. "Probably just upset that I've been tending to more important things."

"Have you been neglecting quidditch?" I asked, turning my attention back to him.

"Never. I might've just omitted a practice or two."

"Draco..." a look of concern washed over my face, "really, I'm fine. You're the captain; don't miss practices just because you want to entertain me for the day or sit with me in the common room—"

"Nonsense," he repeated, "now shall I show you what I've got planned?"

As much as I wanted to protest, my instincts got the better of me as I nodded slowly, a grin tugging on my lips which he returned. He bobbed his head in the direction of the door and instructed me to follow him.

I was actually surprised when he brought me to the third floor, outside of Snape's classroom of all places.

"Do you have to talk to Snape or something?" I awkwardly stood outside the doorway, shifting my weight from one foot to the other.

Draco was already inside the classroom, but once he realized I hadn't understood what was going on, he stepped closer to me and gently grabbed my arm, urging me inside.

"Draco, what are we doing?" I looked around, trying to see Snape. "I don't think he's in here right now."

"Precisely," he smirked.

"Don't you think we'll get caught—"

"Relax y/n, don't stress."

I didn't like the feeling of being in a teacher's classroom without the professor in there. It felt... off. Especially since I wasn't used to Snape being the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, everything felt a bit wrong.

I instead focused my attention on Draco, who used his wand to move the desks out of the way and quickly transfiguring a few things to make cushiony, comfortable chairs across from a larger table appear. I opened my mouth to ask what he was doing, but was quickly shut up once he pulled a small, luxurious looking black velvet pouch out of his book bag and plopped it on the table. With a flick of his wand, it grew in size maybe five or six times.

"You'll definitely like— wait; close your eyes," he instructed, before his hand reached into the now, much larger bag.

Reluctantly, I did as he said, only hearing the sound of some rattling and clanking together. Maybe metal? Plastic? No, it was too heavy and dense to be plastic.

"Okay, open them," I heard him say, prompting me to flutter my eyelids, before my vision focused on a series of games, both magical and non-magical, laid out on the large table.

I noticed, among a few others, there was Senet that we played at home, as well Hounds and Jackals which we mentioned we might get to at some point.

"Oh, Draco, this is really quite lovely," a smile beamed across my face as I walked closer to the table and inspected everything that was laid out. I quickly noticed there was Exploding Snap, Wizard's Chess, even muggle checkers and a few other games I didn't know the names of.

"You like it?"

"Very much," I assured, reaching out to squeeze his forearm affectionately. "Thank you, I really appreciate it. You didn't have to do all this, though."

He looked down at my fingers around his arm, and for a second... maybe a tint of red flushed his cheeks? No, it was quite hot in the room and we both had our long robes on. He met my gaze with large pupils and just smiled, much less cheeky than he had earlier in the classroom.

"I'm glad it's to your satisfaction," he smiled before pulling away slightly to gesture to one of the chairs. "Care to join me for a game... or five?"

———

I'd only played Senet with Draco before, but it turned out he was much better at pretty much everything else except Senet, including a few muggle card games which I was not expecting him to even know about. I'd learned about them from friends or between classes, though never having played much.

During our second round of rummy (the first of which I narrowly beat him), he sent for some snacks that we could munch on. An elf from the kitchens came up and brought us something shortly after.

I took note of how Draco interacted with the elf, not just taking the food and leaving. I was waiting for a few minutes as the two chatted before he returned back to the table.

"Didn't know you were so tight with the worker elves," I joked, eating a cracker with some cheese.

He shook his head, laughing a bit. "Not quite. I just... know them from around. Used to work for my family."

"Your father released a house elf?" I asked, surprised that Lucius would ever do something like that.

"Doesn't really matter how, but regardless, one works here now. He checks up on me still if I ever need anything. I make sure to tip," he laid down a few cards, me following suit.

"Whoever he is makes a good espresso."

The ends of his lips tugged up in a smirk, as I referenced the breakfast that Draco had sent over for me some days ago.

"He's gotten good at it. I've been having one every morning with my breakfast."

"Really? Thought it wasn't going to be replacing your tea."

"Lets just say that after a few days, I was missing the coffee."

"Let's go with that," I chuckled, as I looked around the room. "By the way, are you going to tell me why in Merlin's name we're in Snape's classroom? We couldn't have played cards anywhere else?"

"Nowhere else is as fun," he sarcastically replied as I rolled my eyes. "Okay fine, I sneak in here from time to time. Actually, not even sneaking. I just come in here every so often."

"Snape lets you? I knew you were his favorite, but loitering in his room is pushing it," I laid down another card.

"It's not loitering, y/n. It's... important business."

"Right, because rummy and snacking on cheese and crackers are 'important business'," I laughed, him doing the same. His teeth shone bright and white, the smile on his face meeting his eyes. It was nice seeing him so happy for once, and not gloomy all the time.

"Fine, fine. Severus is my godfather. He lets me do whatever I want, within reason. I get free range of most of his knowledge. And classrooms, apparently."

"Ah, that makes sense. I'd heard you two were close but I had no idea it was like that. No wonder you're his golden boy."

"It's the only time I get to play that role," he picked up a card, then laid another down. "Might as well take advantage of it."

The first thing I thought of was Lucius, how he used to adore Draco as a child, when he was just a carbon copy of the senior Malfoy. Recently? Not so much. Maybe he was compensating by clinging onto whatever attention Snape would give him. I didn't want to overanalyze, but I could tell from over the years that Draco and Snape had a close relationship. That might be the reason why, but I didn't want to ask. We had a nice afternoon going and I wasn't going to ruin it.

"So... you come in here a lot then?" I asked, veering the discussion away from what I was actually thinking.

"You could say that. He might not teach it anymore, but Sev is still a master at potions, so if I need something, I'll ask him to whip it up. Or just take the ingredients myself and do it."

"What kind of potions would the famous Draco Malfoy need? Let me guess, something for pranks: itching potion, causing indigestion, inducing vertigo to make someone trip?"

He laughed again, shaking his head. "You think so juvenilely of me. I swear, I've grown up since first year."

"Don't act like you didn't try to put a leg-locker curse on Ron Weasley last year," I laughed.

"That git deserved it! He knocked me off my broom during quid— okay, maybe you're right," he chuckled. "But I've never made a potion for something stupid like that. A jinx maybe, but I wouldn't waste my time on brewing up a prank."

"Enlighten me, then. What kind of potions do you opt for?"

"This and that. Whatever I need."

"Not revealing your secrets?" I laid down a card.

"Never," he followed suit, smirking.

"I doubt Slughorn would let you get away with any of that."

"Hence why I hang out with sponsor Severus," he grinned. "Perks of having him as a godfather, I suppose."

I paused for a second, letting the weight of their relationship sink in. Draco was his godson, yet I'd never seen him around. Maybe his name had been dropped at a family event here or there, but I chalked that up to just discussing teachers of Hogwarts.

I looked back up at him curiously.

"Do you have any idea what he was up to this past summer?"

He cocked an eyebrow. "The same, I'd figure. Whatever Sev gets up to... brewing potions, wreaking havoc on the newspaper boy."

"He wasn't travelling or perhaps gone for something important?"

"Not that I can remember. You ask, why?"

I thought he'd get what I was implying, but clearly not. I'd have to be more blunt.

"He's your godfather. Why wasn't he... at the wedding?"

I noticed Draco stiffen, sitting a bit more tensely in his chair. With a turn of his neck, he flicked the hair over his forehead to the side, making it appear a bit messy in a boyish way.

He cleared his throat before speaking. "You didn't want anyone from school knowing."

"I suppose at the time I didn't," I treaded carefully, hoping not to upset him, "you still told Blaise and Theo."

"That's different," he stated matter-of-factly, "if I'm being honest, they knew way before it even happened. Severus would've been... part of the wedding. I doubt you would've been comfortable seeing him as head usher," he forced a laugh, although clearly insincere.

That was interesting to hear. I'm assuming he told Theo and Blaise once our fathers finalized the agreement then? I couldn't blame him, I told Daphne only shortly after. Still, it didn't make any sense for him to not invite Snape, though, if they had such a close relationship.

He was right in that it would've been a bit strange to see him there, but he's his godfather. It would've been fine. It's not like Snape is a gossip who'd be telling everyone, anyway.

I clicked my tongue and tried to return my attention to the game, which judging by his body language, I could tell he wanted to do the same.

"How are things with them? Blaise and Theo," I mused.

"I wouldn't know," he shrugged.

"You wouldn't?"

"You saw us in class, the common room. I haven't been on the best terms with them. Not while they've been assholes."

"But you share a dorm with Theo. It's not like you can avoid him, maybe Blaise though."

"You can when you're not sleeping in the same room as him."

My eyes almost popped out of my head at that. Had Draco moved out? That was really unnecessary.

"You're not? But that's your room, too," I chided.

"I'm aware. It's just to send a message that he can't treat you—" he sighed, "can't act like that. I've transfigured a bed and am staying with Crabbe and Goyle for the time being."

"I didn't think it was that bad between you and Theo."

"It is. Until he gets his act together, anyway."

"Don't you miss him?" I asked, a bit timidly. The two of them were best friends, I couldn't imagine them being separated for too long.

He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I do. A lot, actually."

"You ought to make peace, Draco. It's not fair for you to be caught in the middle of this."

"I don't take kindly to people, even my friends, treating... certain people like shit. Especially when he keeps saying it's no big deal and can't tell me what's wrong."

I wanted to avoid the subject as much as possible; I wouldn't be telling him what the issue was between us. I could circle back to Snape? Whatever it took to get off this subject. I wasn't letting up.

We had a short gap between speaking, but neither of us made the silence awkward. It was necessary to flush out the subject matter to something else.

"If you're so close with Snape, how do you feel about Slughorn? Better or worse professor?"

He grimaced jokingly. "Worse professor, better personality."

"I've seen you in Slughorn's; pretty high marks. Even if he doesn't let you loiter around," I laid down another card.

He scoffed with a half grin on his lips. "Right back at you. Still, Sluggy doesn't have that... je ne sais quoi. Severus does."

"You're just saying that since you didn't get invited to the Slug Club," I teased jokingly.

"Like I'd want to go to that club, rubbing elbows with lesser people of lower houses. The thought scares me," he chuckled.

I somehow doubted he was joking, though. There were a few muggleborns, half-bloods, people from different houses. Not quite the people he would typically associate with.

"Your friends were missing you, to say the least."

Although it was my fault, I shouldn't have brought it up. It irked me to think about them, the club... Cedric. I instantly regretted it and a wave of haziness clouded my thoughts. I'm sure he noticed the smile I had been wearing the afternoon vanish off my face, because he did the same.

"Look, I don't know what's got them so upset with you, but I'm really sorry. I've spoken to them, asking them to lay off, but I can only do so much to contain them," he told me, suddenly looking a bit more sullen. His eyes softened, and brows furrowed together. I wasn't sure how many times I'd seen Draco looking concerned before, but if there ever were a time, this would be it.

"It's not your problem, Draco, but thank you. I just wish they weren't so hostile now."

"Especially Theo. You two were so close," he huffed. "Blaise, I expect bad behavior from. But Nott... he's the nice one. Always has been, out of us three."

"Not anymore, it would seem."

"Theo won't tell me what's wrong. Has something happened between you two? I... would like to know."

I sighed, trying to figure out the best way to put it. I didn't want to just tell him the reason, however I was a little surprised that Theo hadn't said anything yet either. But it would explain why Draco was still hanging around me. I figured he might be more upset if he knew, judging by how Theo made it sound. It would've embarrassed him.

"He just flipped a switch. Now he won't even look at me without grimacing. I don't know..."

"Hey," he said softly, noticing I was becoming increasingly absentminded. He caught my attention, forcing me to look up. "I know we're not nearly as close as you and Theo were, but... you've got me. If you need anything, want to open up... no hesitation. I— I'm yours."

A small, thin-lipped smile tugged up my lips. It was more of an acknowledgement than sincere, but I genuinely appreciated it. He was the last person I was expecting to be there, but exactly the right person to do so.

"Thank you, Draco. It might not seem like it right now, but the same goes for me. If you need anything..."

His eyebrows bounced up, what seemed like out of surprise. However, that expression didn't seem to meet his eyes, which stayed fixated on mine. They were darker than normal. The blue-gray that they usually appeared were just gray, the light color from them disappeared.

He slowly dragged his gaze down me to my neck, then around the necklace I had on. It was still the same mystery item I had that showed up at my door with no name attached. His eyes followed up the chain and back down to the moon, then the stars hanging off. He then returned his gaze back to mine, a small smile playing on his face.

Chapter Text

If I thought prefect meetings at the beginning of the year were awkward, it was nothing like the horrors of enduring it after breaking things off with Cedric.

At least at the beginning of the year, I just had Draco that was a nuisance and despite some awkwardness with Cedric, he was mostly at my defense. Now, it was like the complete opposite. I couldn't stand to look at Cedric (which was problematic since he was Head Boy), and Draco was glued to my side the entire time.

As the Slytherin prefects, we were required to sit with each other anyway at the table, but I never remembered Draco being as vigilant as he was now. Every so often when I'd start to zone out, I'd hear him whisper a faint "everything okay?" or "you alright?", sometimes accompanied by gently brushing his fingers against mine to get my attention.

I'd admit that I probably needed the physical contact to break from my hazy mindset most times, but I couldn't ignore the fiery eyes of Cedric on us from across the table whenever it happened, even when he was talking or giving some sort of lecture. When that happened, it always seemed that Hermione swooped in and picked up right where he left off.

Part of me felt guilty, not necessarily for me, but Cedric. Although he didn't know the nature of me and Draco's relationship, the poor guy was forced to endure us sitting together, suddenly cozier than ever, right across from him after I'd told him things wouldn't work out between us. It was no wonder that whenever Draco reached out to touch me or leaned closer to whisper something in my ear, he got distracted.

"It's come to our attention that some of the patrolling partnerships are starting to become a conflict of interest," Granger spoke up, tossing a large piece of parchment in the middle of the table.

I turned my attention to it, which I quickly noticed was the patrol schedule. We'd all memorized which pairs went on what days, so we hadn't needed a physical copy in weeks. Upon further inspection, we saw that everyone's days and partners had been swapped in some way or another.

"What's the matter with the schedule? It was fine the way it was," I spoke up, noticing that everyone was having similar reactions to it. Ron, Padma, and Terry all seemed to be exchanging confused glances as they passed the parchment around.

"Some students have been accusing a couple prefects, not to name any names," Granger glared at Draco and I, "of house loyalties. Unfairly deducting points from rival houses, excessive detentions, but being let off the hook when it's their own housemates."

"That's rubbish," Draco shook his head. "And real subtle, Granger, but I haven't done anything out of sorts. Y/n can attest to that."

"Unfortunately," Cedric interjected in place of Hermione, "Y/n's testimony wouldn't make much of a difference. You two are in the same house so she has as much incentive as you."

Part of me felt offended. Did they think —rather he think— I would stoop so low as to cheating just to win the stupid house cup?

I was nothing like that. Draco, maybe; he was always more apt for house loyalties and squeezing every potential point out for Slytherin, but he wouldn't go so low as to just keep taking points from Gryffindor or another house. More importantly, I wouldn't have let him get away with it. He could have a nasty attitude while tired late at night and patrolling, but that was just his personality.

"So what? We all just switch and mess up everyone's schedule?" I asked.

"Precisely," Granger nodded. "Don't make it seem like we wanted to change, it's a hassle for us all."

"Then let's just keep it the way it was. My partnership was working fine," Draco crossed his arms over his chest.

"Yeah, tell whoever made those complaints to shove off. It's not their place to change prefect positions," I added, looking over at Draco who had his brows tugged together in an annoyed expression. I mimicked it, as well.

Cedric's eyes flickered between Draco and me, and I noticed him tense up. I knew that Cedric wasn't a fan of Draco on the best of days, but especially not now. We were essentially arguing with our superiors just to stay put together.

Wait... we were arguing just to stay put together. Since when did I start enjoying Draco's company so much that I was willing to put up a fight over it? Since when did he start doing the same?

"You're right," Cedric nodded, "it's not their place to say, but it is ours. As Head Boy and Girl we decided this together."

"That's just making more work for everyone involved, Diggory," Draco shook his head before looking to the other prefects at the table. "Shall we all just keep our regular posts?"

Ron grimaced. "I don't want to get used to a whole new schedule, but we can't have those slimy Slytherins stealing points out from under us."

"There's no switching," Granger negated. "If the Slytherins really are cheating, Dumbledore will have our heads for not making the adjustments sooner. It would mess up the whole house cup."

"We are not cheating, Hermione! Have some faith in us!" I defended, suddenly becoming more animated. How could they think we'd do that? Wasn't that the point of sending us in pairs, to cover more ground but also keep each other in check?

"If you bloody Gryffindors kept your asses in bed after curfew we wouldn't have to deduct so many points," Draco huffed.

"Everyone calm down before this gets out of hand," Cedric raised his voice, but not angrily. It was confident and orderly, but lacking that underlying hint of aggression to make it rude.

"This isn't a point for debate," Granger chimed in, holding a similar yet slightly more annoyed tone than her counterpart. "Cedric and I have already made the changes. Have a look yourselves."

Draco opened his mouth to speak, likely to argue some more, but I grabbed his forearm indicating to calm down. His eyes followed my arm all the way back up to meet my gaze, before inhaling deeply and breathing out, quite audibly trying to relax himself. He slumped in his seat, loosening up his tense shoulders and rolling his neck around.

Once the parchment made it our way, we both took a look at it and saw whose names were with each other.

Mon, Wed — Y/n Vitelli, Ronald Weasley

Fri, Sat — Draco Malfoy, Terry Boot

Tues, Thurs — Padma Patil, Hannah Abbot

Sun — alternate Cedric Diggory, Hermione Granger

"Why have you lazy lot only got one night to patrol? And every other week, at that?" Draco huffed, shoving the parchment back over to Hermione.

"Perks of being Head Girl and Boy. Not to mention how many other responsibilities we have on top of organizing your schedule," Hermione glared.

"Feel free to quit your position if you're unhappy, Malfoy," Cedric's eyes narrowed at Draco. "I've heard Theodore Nott, senior, has made a big donation to the school. I'm sure Dumbledore would happily offer his son your honorable spot for Slytherin house."

"Over my dead body," Draco rolled his eyes. "That tosser has done nothing but harass y/n for a week straight; last thing I'm doing is giving him the satisfaction of being prefect."

Right when that sentence left his lips, I turned to glare at Draco whose eyes were slightly widened with the realization of what he said. I didn't have to turn back to look at the group to feel their eyes burning into me.

"Draco," I chided him, which he returned by turning to look at me and whisper a soft "I shouldn't have said that" with a worried expression on his face. It wasn't quite an apology, but I was starting to get used to his version of one.

"Has Nott done something to you, y/n?" Hermione was the first, forcing me to turn my attention to her.

"None of your business," I averted my gaze down to my lap.

"Ron, Padma, Terry, you're free to leave. Memorize the schedule," Cedric directed the remaining prefects.

They all exchanged awkward looks and soft, uncomfortable mumblings as they shuffled out of the room. It felt like forever as I watched them pack up their bags, agonizingly slow, and head out.

The table suddenly felt bigger without the presence of the other three. With just Draco and I on one side with Hermione and Cedric across from us, I was aware of how much of a strange grouping it was. It felt cold, unwelcoming.

"Malfoy, what did you mean by Theodore's been 'harassing' her?" Hermione inquired.

"He's still acting like that?" Cedric added.

"Still?" Draco looked up, the expression of concern previously there now having vanished into one of curiosity. "Does that mean you were aware, Diggory?"

Cedric shrugged defensively. "It was petty, nothing really worth mentioning. I thought it was just some little fight between friends."

"'Little fight'? How can you say that when you know how badly it's affected her?"

"Draco, this isn't your problem," I reached out to grasp his arm again, once again forcing his attention onto me.

"This isn't about that; it's that Diggory knew?"

"I haven't told him everything," I muttered, trying to lower my voice as much as possible. "He was just there for one incident."

"And he didn't stand up for you?"

"Yes, he did—"

"Of course I did, Malfoy. I just haven't seen anything since," Cedric interjected.

"When was this, then?" Draco asked, my grasp on him tightening with the hopes of containing his attitude. I should've known it was pointless, but it was worth a try.

"Draco, it's not a big—"

"The night of the Slug Club," Cedric replied curtly, cutting me off.

The two boys were staring at each other, meanwhile completely ignoring me and admittedly Hermione, too, who couldn't squeeze a word in. She had opened her mouth to speak numerous times which the boys cut off before she could even talk. It was an improvement for her, honestly. I didn't want to hear her anymore than I had to.

"You were at the Slug Club?"

Cedric nodded, in an obvious way. "All of us were. Hermione, Theo, Blaise, y/n, and I."

"So you know Blaise has been like this too?"

"Draco, can you quit it?" I finally interrupted, pulling Draco to look at me.

"He was acting the same as Theodore the night of the dinner. They were pretty rude from the start."

"Do you have any idea why?"

"Draco! Stop it!"

Cedric looked between the two of us confusedly. "I, uh, can only assume."

"What happened with them?"

Clearly, trying to get Draco to shut up was pointless. He kept digging for information, likely because neither Theo or I had told him yet. He'd have done better to not stick his nose in it.

"Cedric," I changed tactics, "don't entertain this any longer."

Unlike Draco, Cedric seemed to halt once I asked him to. Draco kept badgering Cedric, attacking him with quick-fire questions, but Cedric clammed up. He stuck his hands in his pockets, and provided vague responses like "I don't know" or "can't say".

"Come on, Draco, we're heading out," I tugged on his arm in the direction of the door.

"Wait, y/n!" Hermione finally got the chance to speak, "don't you think we should stop whatever's on with Theo? He can't get away with—"

"Forget it, Granger. Like Cedric said, just a fight between friends."

"It didn't sound like it? If he's really harassing you, we can do something."

"He's not! It was just some spat between us, get over it. Nothing serious."

Draco rolled his eyes, looking pissed off as ever. "I know you wouldn't get this, Granger, but some things can be dealt without you knowing. I'll take care of it."

Before either Hermione could say anything else, I had practically dragged him out of the room while he and Cedric traded quips of an argument.

Once we made it out into the corridor, I couldn't hide how annoyed I was. Draco had been fantastic lately; surprising me with little gifts, activities, spending time with me just so I wouldn't be alone.

But it always seemed one step forward, two steps back with us.

I could've forgotten about the fact that he let it slip that things were off with Theo and I, it didn't take a genius to figure that one out. Anyone could assume based on the little time we spent together or if they caught the tail end of a conversation in the common room. "Harassing" was a stretch, but Draco was always melodramatic.

The problem was that once he knew Cedric had some information, he sunk his teeth in and tried to force it out any way he could. If neither Theo nor I wanted him to know, he should've let that be. It should've been left as a problem for the two of us to sort out, not him to dig his way into.

"Y/n, come on, forgive me for that little argument back there. You know I didn't mean to say it," he grasped my arms, keeping me in place in front of him.

"Draco, can we not do this here? They could walk out any second and hear this—"

"Like hell if I care! I shouldn't have told them that Theo's been 'harassing' you; I shouldn't have even used that word. Look, I know you're upset about that, you didn't need everyone knowing, I made a big deal out of a personal problem. I— I should've bitten my tongue."

"Yes, you should've."

I had my arms crossed over my chest, looking clearly unhappy with him. He craned his neck down, trying to get me to look at him, but I kept turning my head to avoid his gaze. I didn't feel like looking at him after he made a scene.

It would've been bad enough in front of the regular prefects, but around Cedric was even worse. I just started feeling better about us breaking things off, and the first prefect meeting back, we have to all start an argument.

When he figured out I had no intention of meeting his gaze, he placed his hands on my waist and pushed me flush up against his chest. A slight gasp escaped my lips as my hands rested on his upper chest, our bodies pressed together.

His brows were furrowed together, eyes looking a deeper blue than usual; the gray in them had darkened to a misty, sultrier tone. They looked colder, which was reflected in his touch. Through my clothes I could feel his cool fingers spread across my waist and partially my back.

His voice lowered to a hush. It had a slight rasp to it, which sent a shock down my spine that made my knees go weak.

"I got upset because I care about you."

If it weren't for his firm grasp on my waist, I probably would've buckled completely at his words.

His lips were parted slightly, his hot breath fanning my skin due to our proximity. My eyes flickered between his lips and eyes, so darkened that I couldn't bear to look at them for too long. They were the most intimidating thing about him. Well, that and his tall, lean figure which towered over me. If he weren't craning his neck down closer to me, I wouldn't have been able to notice the darkened tone of them.

"You keep asking why I've been doing all this, saying it's not necessary to be around you all the time. Yes, it is. When you care about someone, it's what you do. It's what I do."

I noticed his own eyes shift between mine and my lips as I did the same. It was like neither of us could hold each other's gaze, resorting to look elsewhere and landing on our lips.

For a second, a fleeting moment in our grasp, I thought he might close the gap.

"Tell me you forgive me."

It dawned on me that he was right. As uncouth and unconventional as he could be, he did do that because he cared about me. In his own way. He resorted to uncalled quips of anger or frustration, desperate to know things that should've been told to him in private, but it was his way of better understanding the situation to help.

That didn't mean I was happy with his method, but it was certainly his method. And I could deal with that.

My lips curled up in a smirk, which he looked confused at.

"I can't say I'm happy about what just happened... but it is nice having a personal bodyguard all the time. Even if it is a lanky blonde."

The end of his lip tugged up in a cheeky smirk of his own, which he finished off by pulling me in for a tight hug. His arms wrapped around my waist and back while my arms settled for his neck.

For a quick moment, I felt myself being lifted off the ground as I realized he had picked me up and spun me in a tight circle before placing me back down. His head found a place in the crook of my neck and he nuzzled into it, his grasp around my waist tightening as he pulled me impossibly closer.

"Don't scare me like that," he mumbled into my skin, us both letting out a chuckle.

He pulled his head back for a moment to look at me again, eyes glued to mine.

"That means I'm forgiven?"

"If you don't let Granger think I'm being harassed anymore."

He smirked wider, before nuzzling himself back into my neck again. We stayed pressed up against each other for Merlin knows how long, but a considerable amount of time. It felt like a few seconds from the thrill of how my skin trembled under his touch, but it could've been minutes and I wouldn't have known the difference.

"Your personal bodyguard won't allow that," he chuckled. "And he's not lanky. He's... slender."

When he walked me back to my dorm, after having wrapped an arm around my waist and pressed against his side the entire time, I found myself pondering about what could've happened had it gone differently.

I learned that it was better to take Draco's positives, his actual efforts into more consideration than his negatives, the faulty moments that slip out under frustration. It was clear that he didn't always know how to control himself; he was prone to more bad moments than good. But when he did have a good moment, it meant something. Not only to him, but he expected me to know it meant something, too.

By the time I was lying alone in bed, left with only my thoughts for company, I kept replaying the scene of my body pressed against his, him asking for forgiveness, over and over.

The sight of his eyes sent me into a frenzy of emotions. Their darkened state was intensely sensual; it sent shivers down, up, back down and around my body.

The combination of that and his pink, soft lips, slightly parted and quivering with ever the slightest noticeability, I couldn't ignore the fact that I wanted to go back in that moment and do things differently.

If I could, I would've kissed him myself.

Chapter Text

"Shit. Your life is more complicated than I thought... and I didn't think it could get any worse."

I rolled my eyes at Daphne's words, her then sipping her drink across from me at the Three Broomsticks.

Since I'd unfortunately (and unintentionally) been neglecting her and I could tell in her personality that she was getting irritated with me, I promised her we'd head to Hogsmeade for a girls' day. Currently, the two of us were taking a break from devouring some snacks I'd bought for us to catch up on our lives. Admittedly, she did seem a bit tense at first, but noticeably loosened up throughout the course of our discussion.

"You thought being in an arranged marriage was a piece of cake?"

"Not when you were forced to break up with the person you actually loved," I huffed.

"Loved," she echoed.

"Huh?"

"You're speaking in past tense."

A small smile crept its way onto her lips, and when I finally understood her insinuation, I felt my cheeks become red with a blush. Luckily we were alone, nobody else from Hogwarts was in the shop. Otherwise, I'd be terrified of anyone overhearing our conversation.

"I have to, we broke up after all."

"I think you're suddenly referring to him in past tense because you've got someone else you're hopelessly crushing on," she giggled, clearly just trying to embarrass me further.

"Daph! It's nothing like that. And don't call it a crush; that's so juvenile."

"Juvenile when you're already married to him? Yes, I agree."

"I didn't say that I'm crushing on him, nothing of the sort, get it right," I rolled my eyes.

"Right, because daydreaming about a boy who's been nothing but good to you for weeks upon months so much so that you're praying he'll kiss you isn't—"

"Can you shut up? God, I'm regretting even telling you now," I choked out, partially true but also with a hint of a laugh, as I knew she was only doing this to irritate me.

That was confirmed by the giant smile she now was donning, grinning ear to ear and laughing at how embarrassed I was.

"Come on! If I told you I was having these thoughts about someone else, you'd be doing the same. Remember when I had a crush on Adrian Pucey fourth and fifth year? You wouldn't let me live it down."

I wanted to be more annoyed, but laughed as well once I remembered how I tortured her endlessly over it. Teasing her, trying to set them up, even convincing Theo to somehow make them "bump" into each other.

"I suppose. But like I said, I'm not... obsessing over the guy, I just felt like he could have kissed me there."

"Could have? Or should have?" she raised an eyebrow.

"Daphne!" I chuckled, throwing the crumbs of a cookie I just ate at her, which she giggled as she tried to shield herself from.

After her fits of laughter died down a bit, she looked at me. Not necessarily in a serious way, but the joking for her was mostly over, I could tell.

"Maybe this whole thing doesn't have to be as complicated as it seems. This could be an... opportunity?"

I narrowed my eyes, a bit confused at what she was referencing.

"I'm just saying, y/n. You deserve to be happy. Especially if you're with this guy for life; it's not worth feeling miserable over forever."

"I could always divorce him," I shrugged.

I hadn't really entertained the thought, but when she said "forever" it was just the first thing that came to mind. I didn't even mean it, it was just a sort of snappy response.

"And get disowned by your parents, sure," she nodded. "I'm serious, though. There's no reason to beat yourself up about being attracted to him."

"I didn't say—"

"Shh, I'm not finished," she interrupted. "Try to let yourself be attracted to him. Even if it's not love right now, it could be. There must be something there if you wanted him to kiss you."

"A kiss doesn't mean I'm madly in love with him."

"But you could be. Maybe not today, but I think you need to give Draco more of a shot."

"How have I not given him a shot? I married him, didn't I?"

She rolled her eyes. "You know what I mean. I don't think you've been taking his advances seriously, and the poor guy needs a break from competing with your ex-boyfriend who honestly never stopped being your boyfriend."

As much as I wanted to argue with her for that snide comment about Cedric, she was right. It's how I got in this mess in the first place, so I couldn't complain. But Draco's advances? I didn't see him writing love notes or dropping roses at my doorstep.

"I don't think Draco's been overly romantic. He has his... moments, ones that are more personal than others, but it's not like he's confessed his love for me and I'm rejecting him."

Daphne scoffed. "If you don't think that boy has been putting in effort, you're delusional."

"You're right in that he has been there for me a lot lately, especially with the whole Theo thing. It's been kind of nice having him there, but I wouldn't say it's crazy."

"That's another thing I wanted to bring up. Don't you find it odd he's turned his back on his best friend in the whole universe for some girl? He won't even sleep in their dorm room till he's made amends with you. That doesn't sound like the actions of a guy who is 'just friends' or doesn't feel something more for someone."

I actually had considered that; I thought it was strange that Draco was so protective of me when it came to Theo and Blaise, additionally. He had no business in shooing them off when they neared us in the common room or in class, other than maybe what Daphne was suggesting.

That combined with the fact that Draco had vocalized he missed having his friends around, I felt some guilt building up. I had been feeling guilty anyway, but now not for myself. I was disappointed that I had jeopardized their friendship because Draco had taken my side.

Not only that, but... she was right. About everything else he's been doing, anyway. The surprise game times, picnics and food specialty ordered, his newfound excitement for prefect work, all that in combination with his general attitude which was completely different than a few months ago. I swore, he hated me just last year, and now he had admitted he cared for me.

I sighed, running a hand through my hair. "I think for once... just this once, you might be right. Not completely, but right about something."

A satisfied smirk rested on her face. She sat back in her chair and crossed her arms.

"I'm right about a lot more than you think."

———

Daphne and I loitered around Hogsmeade for hours, it seemed. All the while she seemingly had a goal of forcing me to somehow realize my feelings for Draco, whatever those may be.

I found it a bit nauseating at first, but she suggested that I need to do something for him. "Meet him in the middle", as she put it. Just so he knows that I care about him too, and he doesn't have to feel alone if he actually does have romantic feelings for me.

Nothing big, necessarily, but if Draco had been doing all these things but hadn't explicitly stated that he was interested in me, it must be because he was scared I didn't feel the same. That was her logic, anyway.

We agreed it would have to be something he'd actually appreciate, not just getting him some tacky gift that he'd pretend to like, since he already has everything in the world. As such, it meant doing something that would make a difference to him.

That was how I found myself outside his and Theo's dorm room. The one that Draco no longer stayed in, as long as Theo and I were fighting.

I knocked nervously, wondering if Theo would even be there. It was well into the evening, so he might've been with Blaise or out doing something else.

I heard a "come in" from his voice; he must have been expecting someone. Still, I did as instructed and opened the door to find him half dressed, in just a pair of dark black pants and no shirt. His back was turned to me as he buttoned his pants.

"What is it, Blaise? I thought you weren't coming till late—" he turned around to see me, not Blaise, standing in front of him. "What the hell, y/n?! Can't you see I'm not dressed?"

I fought the urge to roll my eyes, knowing I was doing this for Draco. I had to swallow my pride and apologize. As much as I missed Theo, I probably would've waited for him to come around if I wasn't doing this so Draco could get his best friend back.

"You said to come in," I stated matter-of-factly.

"I thought you were Zabini," he sneered. "Now, mind telling me why you're in my room?"

I sighed, mentally preparing myself for the argument that might ensue if I went about this incorrectly.

"Theo, we're best friends," I exhaled, "and I don't want to see us fight anymore."

He placed his hands on his hips, putting on display his bare chest. I noticed he had a shirt sprawled out on his bed, but it must have slipped his mind once I came in. I always knew he was tall and skinny, but without a shirt, he was gangly too. Like he hadn't quite filled out yet, his limbs were long and lanky and chest lacking any muscle. That didn't make him bad looking; in fact, he was the opposite. Theo could never be anything but handsome. But it made me less intimidated, which I found solace in.

"You can fix that. Whenever you stop acting like an adulterer, we can be friends again."

"Adulterer? Really Theo?" I had to stop myself from sounding too annoyed.

"Fine," he huffed, "cheater, having an affair, whatever you wanna call it. I've told you time and time—"

"Please don't be upset with me," I cut him off, "I'm apologizing for Draco's sake."

"Draco?" he scoffed, "since when do you care about his feelings?"

I grimaced at that, but he was right. Only now did I start to realize my feelings for him that went somewhat beyond friendship and dabbled in the romantic.

"Well, it's for me too. I miss you, Theo. But I'd be lying if I said that this was easy, or I wouldn't have waited for you to crack first, so I'm doing this for Draco. I can't drive a wedge between you two."

After I told Theo I missed him, I noticed his demeanor change the slightest bit. Before he looked angry and somewhat tense, but he seemed to soften his facial features. His forehead wrinkled less and eyes widened.

"Again," he breathed out, but this time less with less animosity, "since when have you started caring about what Draco thinks?"

"Ironically, since about the time you started being an asshole," I forced a chuckle, hoping it would alleviate some tension. I quickly realized that wouldn't work. "I'm serious, though. In these past couple weeks Draco has really been there for me. We've... evolved."

"Evolved how?" he raised a brow.

I sighed. "I don't think I can tell you until we're on good terms again. It's... kind of personal. Trust me in saying that I don't want anything to make him unhappy, and right now, he's missing you and Blaise. I can't keep you away from each other."

Theo paused for a moment, running a hand through his hair. It was unruly and curly, like he'd just woken up or perhaps rubbed it dry with a towel. He sat down on the edge of his bed, and I hesitantly moved closer so that I was standing in front of him.

"He knows he can move back in, right? This is still his room. He doesn't have to stay away on my behalf."

"It's not that," I shook my head. "He genuinely misses you guys. Crabbe and Goyle... he outgrew them a long time ago. They can't hold a candle to you and Blaise."

He smirked slightly, scoffing a little. "He always said that."

I smiled small, matching his facial expression. "It's true. You guys work better together. As much as I've loved having him around lately, I can't steal him from you forever."

"I thought he wanted nothing to do with me?"

"Until we get over this spat. He hasn't liked how you two have been less than polite to me since the Slug Club."

"Y/n, I can't go back on that. I'm sorry that we've been assholes, but as long as you're with Cedric—"

"I'm not with Cedric anymore. Never really was, but... it's completely over now."

"W-what? Like, done-done?"

I smiled, noticing the glint of hope in his eyes. "Yes," I chuckled. "Done, finished, capped, concluded—"

"Okay, okay, I get it, no need to bust out the thesaurus," he chuckled. "But, how? When? Why didn't you say anything?"

"It's a long story," I shook my head. "Actually, it was the night of the Slug Club I told him we can't do this anymore."

His eyes widened. "You mean... after Blaise and I..."

"Yes," I nodded, "it was right after that. You two were the worst company that night, but you did push me into breaking things off."

A wash of something, probably remorse washed over his face. I'm sure he was happy at the end of it all, but knowing Theo and his big heart, he must have felt a little guilty for having treated me so poorly even after I finished with Cedric.

"Then why didn't you say anything? Blaise and I would've backed off if we knew—"

"I didn't want to give you the satisfaction. I was angry and didn't want you to think your harassing worked."

"Y/n... I can't tell you how sorry I am. For being a dick, first of all, but for doing it so long..."

"You didn't know," I raised my hand to place on his shoulder comfortingly. "I can't say I'm okay with it, but I'll forgive you since I didn't tell you."

"I could've found out," he shook his head, "I didn't see you two hanging out anymore, he must have told people, I could have just figured it out—"

"Hey, shh, don't worry about it. If you want to let bygones be bygones, I'm fine with that."

A weak smile appeared on his lips. "I'd like that. I have to admit, I've missed seeing your face around these parts. I've needed someone to scam answers off for arithmancy."

I punched his arm jokingly as we both laughed, slowly returning to our normal selves. "I've missed you too. A lot, actually. It wasn't the same seeing you and not being able to tell you everything."

He raised an eyebrow. "Tell me what?"

"We've got a lot to cover."

———

After forcing Theo to keep it a secret (at least until anything further happens), I quickly yet thoroughly updated him on everything in my life, particularly that about Draco.

He was utterly ecstatic, not only because I'd finished with Cedric but also that I was willing, or at least had some interest, in getting to romantically know Draco. He, like Daphne, was convinced that if I was willing to kiss him that night that it must mean something, whatever that something may be.

Blaise eventually ended up coming to the dorm and noticed we were together; as such, I gave him a much more brief version of the story. I wasn't quite comfortable telling him everything, but knowing that Cedric and I were done satisfied him. The two of them apologized numerous times for their bad attitude, and as much as it was horrible how they treated me, I couldn't really blame them. They were just being good friends.

Seeing as it was evening, we made the decision to all go down to dinner together. Walking down with them felt a little strange after about two weeks of animosity between us, but once we got chatting, it all felt normal again. Nobody outside of our house (save for a few Slug Club members which I doubt cared) really knew about our feud, so I was glad that there weren't many eyes watching us as we sat at the end of the table together.

Not many eyes, except for Draco once he walked in. He and I had been sitting together, sometimes with Daphne or whoever else wanted to for the evening, since the whole ordeal started and I could tell he was majorly confused.

At first, I could tell his protective guard went up when he saw us together. He might've thought they were giving me attitude again, but once he saw that we were actually laughing and having a good time, he seemed to calm down a bit. Still cautious, but less direct and argumentative.

"What's all this?" Draco asked, taking his seat next to me and across from Blaise and Theo. "I'm gone for two seconds and you've all made up?"

"Let's just say that we've worked it out," Theo smiled, sending a wink my way which caused Draco to furrow his brows.

"Just like that? Your two weeks of harassing are over with?"

"They apologized," I assured Draco, reaching out to grasp his forearm comfortingly. For the first time, I noticed the sparks I felt when our skin touched. It made me want to pull back, but it would've been too obvious; I had to play it cool for the time being.

"Y/n is being modest," Theo interjected. "She was actually the one who apologized to me, then Blaise. We only did so after she made the first move."

Draco shifted his gaze between the two of us. "You did... what? They've been the ones doing wrong and you're the one who makes amends? That's not right—"

"Draco, it's fine," I cut him off. "I did it to make peace, finally."

"Why would you want to do that? It doesn't sound right for you to be forced to apologize after what they've done."

I noticed that Theo and Blaise were exchanging looks between themselves which allowed for a slightly more private moment between Draco and I. It wasn't perfect, however, so I lowered my voice to a hush so only he could hear.

"I did it for you."

He looked taken aback, confused and silently pleading for an elaboration, which I gladly gave him.

"You've been saying that you miss having them around. I couldn't be the reason you and your friends are apart."

His eyes bore into mine. "Y/n, I would've picked you over them anyway, that wasn't necessary—"

"Yes, it was necessary. They're my friends, too, but you couldn't get caught in the middle. After everything you've been doing for me, I couldn't let you lose something like that."

A small smile grew on his lips. He looked down at my hand still on his arm before returning my gaze.

"It must not have been easy for you."

"I can't say it was, but it was worth it. To see you happy... that's why I did it."

"Th-thank you," he slightly stuttered shaky words.

"Don't thank me, Draco. It's just something you do when you... care about someone."

His eyes widened, with a slight glint in the bluest parts of the irises. The end of his lip tugged up in a smirk, but not a malicious one. It looked like it was some sort of satisfaction, a state of being content. I swear, I could've almost caught the sight of his pale skin turning the lightest shade of pink, but that was gone as he leaned in close to my ear.

"That means more than you know," he whispered with a sensuosity that made me almost melt right in front of him.

While I was still dealing with the effects of his words, I wasn't prepared for the physical gesture he gave next. He brought his long and nimble fingers up to move a few strands of hair behind my ear before pressing his lips to my cheek in a soft kiss.

Merlin, I was putty in his hands.

It was short lived, but I could feel the lingering feeling of the shock waves he sent throughout my body from both his voice and kiss. If we weren't in the Great Hall, I don't know what I would've done.

There was no way I could've hidden the blush that spread across my cheeks after that, and I felt all the more embarrassed it happened right in front of Theo and Blaise. They probably were over the moon with excitement, but I felt like it was a bit too much in such a public setting.

I was still glad it happened, though.

Draco must've noticed how flustered I was, since he turned his attention back to the boys.

"Does this mean I can move back in?" he joked, causing us all to chuckle.

"You never had to leave, mate. It's not the same not waking up to you not writing in your diary at the crack of dawn—"

"It's not a diary!" Draco insisted, causing Blaise and I to laugh even louder. "It's... a journal. Fuck off, Theo," he chuckled.

The two of them continued trading jokes, and I could tell Draco was happy to have his friends back. He needed it.

Every so often I'd catch him look my way, and his gaze lingered just a bit longer than it should've. When I turned back to meet his eyes, he turned away like he'd been caught.

We continued this trend of catching each other staring so many times, by the end of dinner and toward dessert, his neck peeking out from his robes was reddened with a blush. It hadn't quite met his cheeks, but he certainly was flustered.

I reached under the table for his hand, rubbing the back of it to soothe him. His breath hitched, and the pink tone of his cheeks flushed a darker red which caused him to run his free hand over his forehead, like it was hot.

After giving himself a moment to calm down, he guided my hand back to my own lap, which made me frown. Why had he done that? I suddenly felt a bit embarrassed; I shouldn't have been so forward.

To my surprise which caused me to smile bashfully right away, he intertwined our fingers so that the back of my hand was resting on my leg. His long fingers had the range of my own hand as well as some of my thigh which he occasionally rubbed soothingly.

It was the slightest gesture, ever so innocent and tender, but drove my senses into a frenzy. I couldn't deny that his touch sent me alight; the feeling of his skin against mine was comforting yet also sent shock waves up my arm and fizzled out through the rest of my body.

I was enjoying the contact so much that when we finally separated and headed to our own dorms after dinner, I was thinking only about how much I missed his touch.

Chapter Text

I sat down at the stands of the quidditch pitch with a stack of parchment and a quill in my lap, my astronomy textbook on my right. Daphne was sat similarly to my left, hastily flipping through her book. The wind from the crisp afternoon made the ends of the pages flap up, much to her annoyance.

Theo told me that most of the Slytherin team would be practicing today and invited us to watch. He allegedly needed some help with astronomy homework, but couldn't afford to miss a practice. As much as I wanted to refuse, I couldn't say no when he put on those puppy dog eyes.

Things had gone back to normal with the two of us and I couldn't be happier. Life wasn't the same without him.

"Have you got the worksheets ready?" Daphne inquired, peering over her book.

"Yeah," I held a few up pieces of parchment. "Whenever he's ready to come over."

"Better hope he doesn't drip sweat on them."

I cringed, laughing, as she did. "I don't know how that boy thinks he can manage studying in the ten minute breaks between quidditch strategies, but power to him."

I looked up from my papers to see Theo, along with Adrian and Lucian Bole, messing around trying to dodge the bludger. Clearly, practice hadn't quite started yet.

Theo was draped rather primitively over his broom, handling it with about the care of a gorilla. As much as I loved him, he had an immaturity about playing that made me laugh. Good thing he was chaser; he probably would've sucked as a beater.

Still, I couldn't deny that he was good looking, nobody could. Out of everyone on the quidditch pitch, my eyes went straight to Theo's dashing good lo— Draco. Of course. How could I have forgotten he was on the team? Not only that, but captain. No wonder they hadn't started yet.

I felt my heart sink into the pit of my stomach, an unwelcome anxiety bubbling up my chest to the base of my throat when I saw him. He was pretty far away, but it was hard to miss that platinum blonde hair. My attention had been ripped away from Theo faster than you could say "seeker".

"Loverboy caught your attention?" Daphne grinned teasingly.

I blushed, turning my gaze away from the quidditch pitch and back to my notes. "I forgot he'd be here, actually. Just came to help Theo."

"Maybe Theo's the one helping you out," she smirked.

"Yeah, right. If that were the case, then why would he ask me to help him during their breaks? It'd be better spent with me and Draco together."

"It's not like Draco needs help with astronomy. If anything, he'd be the one tutoring you."

"Gee, thanks for the vote of confidence," I shook my head.

I let my gaze wander up for a fleeting moment, landing on Draco who had surprisingly been looking my way too.

He sent a satisfied smirk, one that made me happy he was far enough away that he wouldn't see the blush tinting my cheeks. He nodded his head in a manner of acknowledgement, like a silent "hello". I gave him a small wave back, nothing big but certainly enough to get my heart racing.

"Could you be anymore obvious?" Daphne chuckled.

"Shut up, I am not," I looked down at my book.

"Then how come you ignored Theo when he called your name? Too busy looking at Draco."

Only then had I shifted my eyes to see Theo staring back at me, laughing his head off and looking between Draco and I. He swung an arm around Draco and punched him in a boyishly mischievous way.

I gathered the parchment I had on my lap and lightly smacked her arm with it, causing her to recoil jokingly. "Ouch, what was that for?"

"Not having your own life for me to make jokes about."

———

"Ew, don't drip on the parchment," I chuckled, pushing the paper closer to Theo.

A bead of sweat had slipped down the bridge of his nose and off the tip, onto the paper. He still had a mass of sweat around his forehead and accumulating on his chest, soaking through his shirt. He smelled pretty bad too, but he was lucky he was good looking. Even sweated out and oily.

"Told you," Daphne chimed in.

"There's no way I'm gonna be able to retain any of this," Theo looked up and down the worksheets, "I'm too tired. And practice resumes in, like, seven minutes."

"That's what I said," I glared at him, knowing it was a bad idea.

"For once, you were right. Wanna just do a rapid review?"

"Doesn't work like that. Unless you can happen to point at the shape of and name constellations of the night sky at three in afternoon without even a page for reference?"

He shrugged. "I'm screwed then."

"Don't worry about it, Theo. Kinda pissed off you had me come for nothing but we can reschedule a study session."

"I won't have time though, with quidditch and—"

"We'll make time. Before class, during mealtimes, whenever."

He grinned at me, a boyishly handsome one that tugged up into a more malicious smirk. He inched closer to me on the bench, causing me to scoot back parallel to how fast he was moving.

"Theo... what are you doing..."

Without warning, he flung his arms around me in a giant bear hug, his long limbs wrapping around me and rubbing up against my body. He was sweaty and gross, and despite my shrieks of disgust, he only further rubbed up to annoy me.

"Ew, Theo!" I whined, "get off!"

"No can do. I show my appreciation through hugs. Sweaty, sticky ones," he tortured me some more before I finally pushed him off.

"I prefer the ones after you've showered and put cologne on," I preened myself, feeling gross after the contact. I felt like I was going to puke if I hadn't got him off right then.

I took my wand out of my bag and performed a quick cleansing spell to rid myself of any sweat or smell he rubbed on me. I then pointed it at him and did the same charm quickly. He instantly looked (and smelled) a lot cleaner, which surprisingly he looked upset about.

"Hey, that was my manly musk!"

"Remind me to do that first thing when you come to us, next time."

"It's no use since I'm just going to do it again once practice is over," he smirked.

"What's going on here?" I heard the voice of Draco prompt us, all of our heads turning to look at him.

He looked like Theo had a moment ago, the difference being that when it was Draco, it somehow was attractive. His hair, damp with sweat, clung to the front of his forehead and when he brushed it to the side with his fingers, the glisten of his platinum locks had my eyes glued to it.

His hair was always so well kept that I hardly ever got to see it messed up. Even in past quidditch games, I never took note of how he looked since I wasn't really interested. Now, I wondered how I was ever able to ignore it.

"Harassing the professor," Theo smirked.

"Huh?" Draco cocked his head to the side, clearly confused. He must not have caught the tail end of our conversation.

"Trying to tutor Theo to no avail," I shook my head. "You guys getting ready to start again?"

"As soon as Pucey get the quaffles together. You know how he is." His gaze lingered down to the papers and notebook in my lap, a ghost of a smirk playing on his face. "That explains the study material. Thought you just came for the view."

At the insinuation of his flirty comment, I definitely could not hide the blush that was reddening. How was he able to do that to me so quickly? Had he always, and I'd never noticed it before? Whatever it was, it had worked its magic on me. Judging by the expression he had on his face, it was to his liking.

"Oh, we did," Daphne added. "Who wouldn't wanna see Theo fall flat on his face during drills?"

"I did not! It was... my shoulder," he looked down.

As the two of them traded quips, my eyes met Draco's, the same half grin still gracing his lips. We had this moment of acknowledgement, it was like a private knowing moment between us that made me smile bashfully. All the while the sounds of Daphne and Theo bickering faded out to white noise, it made the look between Draco and I more personal.

Merlin, did he look good in his quidditch jersey.

Finally, he tore his gaze from mine and pulled Theo up by the arm. "Hate to break up this philosophical conversation, but we should get back."

Theo turned to look at me. "Beware of more sweaty hugs."

Draco crinkled his nose in disgust. "Gross, Nott."

Daphne and I just laughed, to which Draco looked down then pulled Theo off with him back to the pitch.

———

I was leaning against the wall of the boy's locker room, shuffling through some parchment in my hands. Theo had gone in to shower and change (after he tried to pull another sweaty hug on me) and said that he'd be out soon enough for us to study. However, knowing Theo, I'm sure he'd be too tired and just want to devour the whole dining hall's worth of food.

To their merit, they spent a lot of time out there. Another hour or so, and I could tell he was exhausted. As much as we teased Theo for the occasional fall off his broom, he wasn't a bad player.

After waiting a few minutes, I felt a hard figure crash into mine, causing my papers to fly everywhere out of surprise. I looked up and saw Draco who had his eyes on the parchment scattered about.

"Y/n, what are you doing loitering around the locker room?" he asked, bending down to pick up some papers.

"Oh, it's fine, you don't have to—"

"Nonsense," he confirmed, gathering up some homework sheets. I was down with him, organizing a few until they were orderly once more. "Didn't know you had a library's worth of papers on you."

I chuckled as we both stood up and I pushed the papers back into my bag. "Just waiting for Theo. You know, the alleged tutoring that's been meaning to happen all afternoon."

"Theo?" he raised an eyebrow. "He's beat. No way you're getting an ounce of studying out of him."

I groaned, expecting this. "I knew it, but he just insisted— aren't you going to go change too?" I motioned to his figure still in his workout clothes, while the other boys had already gone to shower.

He shook his head, bringing his hand to the back of his neck and scratching it awkwardly. "No, I uh, wanted to practice some more."

"By yourself?"

"The seeker works alone, anyway. Just let the snitch out for a bit longer; I could do with the practice."

Part of me admired his dedication. It was nice that he wanted to stay longer and practice by himself, but another part of me remembered how he once said this was a common thing. He takes time off from everyone else to work by himself. There was something lonesome about it, whether or not he was aware of it. I felt a pang of guilt about that; even if he was right that the seeker doesn't need teammates to help.

"Do you want some company?" I offered, the words leaving my lips before I could even process what I was saying. I suddenly felt a bit embarrassed, he probably wanted privacy, considering he didn't ask any of his team—

"I'd love that," he smirked, pulling me out of my own thoughts. A small smile crept its way onto my lips which I tried to cover up by pressing them to a thin line. "Theo's just got in there, he'll be a while anyway."

After some small talk on the way back to the pitch, I transfigured a blank parchment into a blanket so I could lay down on the grass as Draco worked. I had offered to help him somehow, but he knew I wasn't the most athletically apt. He insisted I just watch instead.

And watch, I did.

There was something undeniably attractive about just observing his workout. Unlike when the team practiced together, he had his own practice routine, skipping warmups or pointless drills he didn't need for his own position. I took note of what he liked doing, what he didn't, what he spent more time on or chose to omit.

It was kind of fascinating; it said a lot about him as a person. He had so much confidence in regular interactions, and it was translated on the field. Sure, he was prone to a few fumbles, but everyone was. For the most part, he certainly looked the best player and I could tell why everyone voted him captain.

Putting aside the actual workout, I couldn't deny that my real focus was on how insanely good he looked. With every flick of his hair to the side, stretch of his long arms, or just seeing how focused he looked while trying to catch the snitch, I felt a familiar knot in my stomach tighten with a sensual anxiety. It was a type of attraction that started low, but spread up and throughout my whole body, fizzling out to my fingertips. It was like all my body (and mind) could process was Draco.

More than a few times, I was sure he noticed the way I was shamefully gawking at him. I probably looked like I was drooling, with my lips slightly parted and eyes darting after his every move. I couldn't help it; he was addicting.

After catching the snitch quite a few times, he packaged it up back in its holding case and secured the clasp.

"Finished so soon?" I asked, sauntering over to him in the middle of the pitch.

He stood back up then wiped his forehead clean of any dampness with his forearm. His skin was on display now that he'd taken his gloves off, and it made him all the more attractive to see his tense muscles and veins against his skin.

Fuck, he looked so good.

"Disappointed?" he smirked.

"Maybe a little. I thought you could do with the practice." I placed my hands on my hips, trying to keep my cool and push aside the thoughts I was having.

"I did, five times actually. Don't tell me you want me to entertain you some more," he grinned.

I shrugged, returning his smirk. "I think I deserve it after the way I've spent my afternoon doing charity work."

He chuckled, his voice sounding deeper and more raspy as a result of his workout. The throaty undertones of his laugh were almost enough to make me tackle him right on the grass.

Calm down, y/n. He can probably smell it on you.

"How about we make this a little more interesting then?" he asked.

I raised my eyebrows. "Surprise me."

That malicious grin of his set deeper, meeting his eyes that had a playful glint in them. They looked bluer in the afternoon sun, as well as the glisten of the sweat playing on his cheeks to accentuate his features.

"How good are you at flying?"

A look of shock crashed over my face as I shook my head. No way, not happening. I sucked at flying. After first year's mandatory lessons, I stopped altogether. Watching quidditch was fine, but you couldn't pay me to get back on a broom.

"Forget it, Draco," I continued shaking my head vigorously, "not gonna happen."

"Come on, it won't be as bad as you think!"

"How do you know that?"

"You have the Slytherin house captain as your private instructor," he grinned.

"Haven't you shown off enough today?" I chuckled.

"Clearly not enough," he summoned his broom which was a few feet away. It hit his palm with a thud and he held it out to me, which I refused to take.

"Told you, not happening," I crossed my arms over my chest. "I hate flying."

He pulled the broom back to him and rested it against his chest casually. His eyes narrowed, like he was in thought.

"Let's make a deal, then. If you let me take you on a ride and you hate it, then I'll owe you..." his voice trailed.

"Owe me what?"

His lips curled up again in a playful leer. "A surprise."

"I'm gonna need more specifics than that. A surprise could be a pack of chocolate frogs or a fire breathing dragon that burns off my hair."

He chuckled, shaking his head. "You know I'd never do that to you. Plus, if I told you, it wouldn't be a surprise."

"Precisely. Deals don't go well with surprises. It kind of defeats the purpose of a deal."

"I promise, you'll like it. It'll be a good surprise. Something to make up for the bad flight."

I stayed silent a moment, thinking it over, before nodding.

"Alright then, and if I like it? Hypothetically..."

He cocked his head to the side, looking like he was in thought. He ran a hand through his hair that still stuck to his forehead in sweat beads that soon after fell right back and stuck back on his skin.

"If you don't hate it... there'll be a party this Saturday after the quidditch game against Ravenclaw. I could do with a plus-one."

Was he... asking me out on a date? No, no. We'd hung out, alone, many times together before. And this wouldn't even be alone. It'd be with our entire house. Speaking of which, that didn't even make sense.

"You're inviting me... to something I'm already invited to?"

His face was already red from the flush of working out, but I noticed for a moment the tone of his skin deepen into a darker tone. He probably realized how stupid it sounded out loud. I didn't mind, though. If anything, it was cute.

He cleared his throat, standing up a bit straighter.

"But how many girls in our house can say they're being escorted by the captain and seeker who will have won the game?"

"You're so confident you'll win."

"After the... extra work I put in today, how could I not?" he teased.

Part of me wanted to laugh, the other half wanted to just tell him he didn't even need to ask that. I'd be at his beck and call anytime he wanted me; probably even when he didn't.

"Since I'll be there anyway," I tried to play it cool, "it's a deal."

He looked satisfied with himself, which I hoped didn't translate to being too cocky with the broomstick ride. I still was terrified; as much as I wanted to spend time with him, this wasn't what I had in mind.

To his merit, he did try to make me as comfortable as possible.

The first couple moments were just getting me used to the feeling of the broom underneath me again, considering I hadn't done this since I was probably eleven or twelve. To be honest, I kind of forgot how it felt. It was so awkward, my feet on the pedals, being hunched over on nothing but essentially a stick.

"You're gonna be fine, just relax," he assured. "It's not like you haven't done this before."

"Yeah, seven years ago," I huffed.

"Relax," he echoed, mounting the broom behind me so his chest was pressed flush against my back. His arms went around mine, keeping them in place around the broomstick in front of me. His arms were long enough so that they could reach entirely around me and onto the wood.

Thank Merlin he was behind me and not in front, otherwise he would've felt my heart palpitations from the proximity. I didn't even care that he was still sweaty from his workout, or his jersey was damp and sticky. I could shower later. I was just reveling in the feeling of him against me.

"Keep your hands there," he lowered his voice, now that his lips were so close to my ear. He moved his chin slightly down so that it rested on my shoulder, urging me to lean into his touch. I didn't dare do so, but oh how I wanted to.

"Don't stress, I'll be right here the whole time," he continued saying little phrases of affirmation, but I had tuned them out almost entirely. Everything sounded like noise as I was focused on the physical interaction between us; all I knew is that whatever he was saying was encouraging. Part of me liked it, just hearing his voice so soft and comforting, but the other part of me wanted him to shut up and just wrap his arms around me.

Somehow, his physical contact with me actually took my mind off the fact I was about to fly a skinny wooden death trap, and we were in the air. Granted, I was kind of just there, he was doing all the work. But by the time I realized we were halfway up to the quidditch goals, I had only been thinking about him pressed against me that I couldn't process I wasn't on the ground anymore.

"This alright?" I heard him ask, his breath hot against my cheek.

As much as I wanted to say so, my mouth wouldn't articulate the words as all I could do was stare down at the grass and pray I wouldn't fall and die. How embarrassing would that be. Instead, I just nodded, my eyes glued on the grass.

"Y/n, it's fine," he continued assuring me, "let me handle it."

I felt his fingers leave from around my arm and I became nervous once more, but once I felt them on my chin urging me to look up, I understood what he was trying to do. Once he knew that I wouldn't look down anymore, he returned his arm around me to secure me on the broom again.

He already was, but I allowed him even more access of the broom to fly us around the field. I appreciated that he wasn't going too high, otherwise I actually probably would've been even more terrified. However, he did slowly but surely find a pace that eventually sped up. Not anywhere near as fast as him during quidditch games, but fast for a beginner.

I wasn't comfortable by any means, but I certainly loosened up over the course of the ride. Little by little, my shoulders became less tense and I let myself sink into his grasp a bit more. I'm sure it wasn't easy for him having to keep me secure the whole time, but if he was upset, I wouldn't have known. I looked at him a few times, turning my head so ours were even with each other, and every time I did so, I only saw him smile at me which I returned.

It wasn't necessarily fun, but I didn't hate it. I still had my fear of flying feeling like it was about to burst at any moment, but I forced my mind to think about Draco instead. At the very least, I could enjoy the feeling of him against me to distract from any anxieties.

After some time, he brought us back down to the grass and gently helped me down, offering a hand which I gladly took. I felt like I had vertigo or something when my feet touched the ground again. Everything was wobbly and shaky.

"That happens," he noticed my imbalance as I got used to the ground again. "It'll wear off in a minute or two."

"I— that... it wasn't too bad," I choked out, my gaze shifting from Draco to the air in the sky where we had been. My eyes followed the path of where we went, shooting around as if I were trying to mimic what just happened subconsciously.

"I told you it wouldn't be," he smiled, bending down to secure his broom on top of the chest with the snitch. They both were labelled "D. Malfoy" in a neat calligraphy. He had surprisingly nice handwriting. Had I seen it before somewhere? There was a familiarity about it.

From where I was standing a few feet from him, I noticed a silver glint from around his neck that I'd never seen before. It must have been a necklace, a chain of some sort. There was something small and circular hanging off the end of it, however I couldn't see exactly what it was.

"Since when do you wear necklaces?" I inquired, trying to move closer to see it.

"Oh, that's nothing," he prompted, tucking the chain inside his jersey. I frowned at the mild rejection.

"Just didn't think you were the type. I'm sure it's nice."

"It is," he affirmed before looking up to meet my eyes. "You didn't see it?"

I shook my head. "Just the chain of it."

He exhaled slightly, closing his eyes. Was that relief? Did he not want me to see it?

I felt a mild discomfort shoot through my body. He was entitled to privacy, but I felt a little embarrassed for bringing it up since he clearly didn't want it to be seen.

"I'll show it to you... sometime. Some other time, I mean."

"Oh, you don't have to—"

"But first let's settle the deal. I believe you owe me some company this Saturday."

My nerves washed away once I saw the smirk on his face. I had felt like he was shutting me out for a moment, but he must have just wanted to discuss that instead. Thank Merlin; I couldn't have handled it otherwise.

"I suppose you're right. That is, assuming you'll win."

"It's me versus Cho Chang," he scoffed. "You're doubting my victory?"

I laughed, knowing that he was right. Cho was a great person and very intelligent, but certainly the least talented of the four seekers, unfortunately for Ravenclaw.

"Looks like Slytherin's going to have a lot to celebrate."

"I'll see you then?" he asked, sort of bidding me goodbye.

"Definitely," I wrapped my arms around his neck for a parting hug, probably lingering a moment too long.

My face was nuzzled into his neck as his arms were wrapped around my waist, absorbing his body heat.

Against his neck, I felt the vibrations of a chuckle deep from his throat. I pulled back slightly to make eye contact with him, raising an eyebrow. He had that same, sly smirk on his lips.

"What is it?"

"I thought you didn't like sweaty hugs."

Chapter Text

Like most quidditch games, I was struggling to keep my attention on the actual sport for most of the time. I liked quidditch, it was fun enough, but it could get tedious watching twelve people try to score or defend against goals while two chase a tiny golden ball around at top speeds. Sometimes the games were quick, and others were much longer than I thought necessary.

This was somewhere in between, but I still felt my attention span lessen with each minute passing. Every "ding" of the scoreboard counting another ten points made me look up to see who scored, then I mindlessly returned my gaze back to Draco and Cho Chang.

It was more of a ritual thing, my eyes following the seekers, but a person could only watch a green figure and a blue figure chase that ball for so long. It got tiresome.

Daphne, on the other hand, seemed amused more than ever. In fact, it was uncharacteristically attentive of her to watch so closely. I turned to look at her, and scanned where her eyes were following.

It was a brunette boy, clad in green which meant he had to be a Slytherin. I wouldn't expect her to like anyone outside of our house, anyway, but it was like her eyes shone as she watched him move about. He must have been a chaser, by the nature of how he moved about and handled the quaffle.

That meant it had to be either Theo, Marcus, or Adrian. I could rule out Marcus Flint right away, seeing as I knew she'd said to me many times before he was the worst looking on the entire team, but I couldn't pinpoint whether it was Theo or Pucey. She'd liked Adrian in years past, so that wouldn't surprise me, but Theo was handsome too, and they certainly had a good relationship as friends.

I took a second gander, this time closer and more intent on trying to differentiate. It was harder than I thought, actually, since they were both tall and lean brunettes. Unlike Draco who was easy to spot as seeker and with his platinum hair, Theo and Adrian sort of blended together from far enough away, considering the speed of their brooms too.

Once one chucked the quaffle through the goal post, I heard the voice of Lee Jordan exclaim, "Theodore Nott scores ten points for Slytherin!"

My attention on Daphne was fixated so I could judge her reactions. She seemed unaffected, her eyes still on someone else.

And so, I deduced, it was Adrian after all.

"Pucey? Really, Daph?" I asked.

She looked at me, eyebrows raised and confused as ever. "Wh- what? How did you know? I never even said anything!"

I chuckled, shaking my head. "You really thought you could hide that? You looked like a lovesick puppy, for Merlin's sake."

"Hush! I don't need our whole house overhearing," she quieted, looking around nervously. In her defense, we were in the Slytherin stands packed together like sardines. Anyone could have heard if she didn't prompt me to quiet.

"But come on," she continued, "you know it's always been him."

"When you were fourteen and fifteen?" I mused.

"Some crushes never die."

She was certainly right about that, but I just couldn't fathom how she was still into Adrian after all this time. I remember she allegedly got over him sixth year after he was rude to her on a few occasions, and he had gone out with our friend Tracey. That meant he was off-limits; you couldn't like your friend's boyfriend.

"Do you plan on speaking to him anytime soon?"

She shrugged dismissively. "Don't know, it's not much of a priority. I'm fine with admiring from afar. Wouldn't be anything new."

"There's the party after the game today," I suggested, "you could join Draco and I for drinks, Adrian is always somewhere close by."

"That's if we win. Judging by the scoreboard, we're nowhere near."

That prompted me to look up, and unfortunately, she was right. It was 90 Ravenclaw to 20 Slytherin; we were getting destroyed.

"There's still time for Draco to catch the snitch," I offered, digging for any source of solace I could find.

"Not as much time as you'd think. Ravenclaw's got the quaffles as of right now," she pointed to their chasers.

I turned my attention back to Draco who looked rather even with Cho Chang. They were both quick, no doubt, but Draco seemed like he had some killer instinct Cho lacked. It wasn't good, necessarily, because I'd seen before how his arrogance and aggression could get the better of him. It wasn't uncommon for him, or Slytherin in general, to resort to dirty tactics to win a game or two.

My mind floated back to how he had knocked Cedric off his broom a few games back. The only difference was that there, it backfired on him and Hufflepuff won the game. But judging by how Draco looked, and the impatience to win —to prove something— that I knew was bubbling up in him, made my skin crawl with jitters that he might pull something underhanded to steal a victory from Ravenclaw.

"You never know," I looked back at Daphne, "he might surprise us."

"For your sake, I hope he does."

I sighed, knowing he must be getting upset. I could see in the way his figure dashed more aggressively than Cho who had a more elegant and graceful appearance about her agility. Draco was hungrier, more blunt and willing to make moves that could be considered dangerous.

"Damn, Draco could calm down a little. No need to act like a bull in a china shop," she huffed, pointing to how he dashed across the field in upsettingly quick manner.

"He's certainly getting closer to the snitch than Cho, though."

"Eh, seems to be fluctuating back and forth. Don't know how they keep their attention on it for so long."

Unlike the seekers, I found it increasingly difficult to maintain focus on the game. Even though she was enchanted by Adrian, I knew she was getting bored too. I liked watching Draco move about, but not when he used these guerilla maneuvers.

My eyes wandered around the pitch, looking at who was there. No doubt, the only two large crowds were Ravenclaw and Slytherin, but plenty of Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs still came to observe. I once remember Draco saying that they often go to other games to better understand each other's strategies and can plan theirs accordingly.

"Cho Chang makes a daring move for the snitch!" I heard Lee Jordan's voice boom over the speakers, ripping my attention away from the crowd and back to the game. "Close, but not close enough it seems! The Ravenclaw seeker plunges for the ball, but misses by a hair. Draco Malfoy responds, even with Chang, a little too close for comfort!"

Lee was absolutely correct; Draco was too close. They were practically pressed shoulder to shoulder, which was surprising with how Draco managed to get so close after Cho almost caught it. Draco leaned into the broomstick a little more, maybe trying to find some more pace. The snitch zig-zagged around, darting from left to right, up, down and back around. The two seekers almost looked like parallels of each other, mimicking the same movements as they both followed the gold ball so close behind.

Draco looked over at Cho, before making the move to extend his arm out to the snitch. It was a lost cause, as it was simply too far, but his arms were undoubtedly longer than hers. His broom wouldn't have to be closer than hers if he wanted to get it, which she clearly realized as she tried to force some extra speed out of her broom.

Unfortunately, it looked like Draco's extended arm caused some imbalance on his broom, now that his weight was unevenly appropriated. He looked like he wobbled a bit, causing him to grasp his broom with both hands again and fall considerably behind Cho. For a moment I thought he might have screwed himself over, but I almost made the mistake of forgetting quidditch was a team sport.

"Slytherin Beater Lucian Bole looking deadly with the bludger! He knocks it straight toward Chang, far ahead of Malfoy," Lee narrated for the crowd.

The bludger looked lethal, barreling toward Cho at such top speed. The ball had a mind of its own, but the beaters (especially Slytherins) did a fatal job of sending it to the other team. Cho barely dodged it, but certainly looked shaken up as a result. She refocused her attention back on the snitch and went about her pursuit of it, moving around more rapidly to avoid a future bludger attack.

While the ball wasn't aiming for her anymore, the bludger looked like its new target was Draco. Still considerably behind Cho, he had to make an effort to dash around the bludger and any potential attacks, since the beaters were far enough away that they couldn't defend against it or send it to another player.

"The Slytherin seeker takes a clear shot at the Ravenclaw!" Lee announced. "In a shocking move I've never seen before in a civilized game, he projects the ball at Cho Chang in front of him, nearly knocking her off her broom!"

"What the hell?" Daphne's jaw drops, my expression probably mimicking hers.

There was no way Draco just did that. He somehow caught the bludger like a quaffle and launched it at her, like a primitive rock throwing contest. That was well outside of the bounds of a seeker's territory, and could be considered an illegal or at least penalizable, dangerous move.

Did he have no decency? He threw the ball at her from behind, a sneaky and unfair move at best, lethal at worst from the height they were at. If Cho didn't regain her position, the poor girl would've been out cold, in the infirmary for Merlin knows how long.

Lee Jordan's voice returned over the speakers, much more official and calm sounding than a moment ago, almost like he was reading off something. "Madam Hooch will be investigating the recent maneuver of Slytherin seeker Malfoy toward Ravenclaw seeker Chang for potential rule violations. The seekers may continue their pursuit of the snitch until further notice, however may result in a penalty or disqualification of seeker Malfoy."

Sounds of disgruntled behaviors erupted from the Slytherin side. While I wanted to join in, purely out of team and house loyalty, I knew deep down Draco deserved it. Maybe he wouldn't get a penalty, but what he did was far too dangerous and not acceptable. He was so used to playing dirty, he should just believed in his abilities and play square. He was an incredible talent; there was no need for him to play like a monster.

As almost a sort of karma, the bludger seemed to refocus its course on Draco again. No longer going after Cho, despite him throwing it at her, it directed its attention on the blonde boy. He certainly deserved to sweat a bit after what he did, but it was looking dangerously close, too. Over and over he darted around to avoid its attack.

"How do you feel about Draco looking battered and bruised?" Daphne smirked, her lame attempt at a joke making me nudge her in disapproval.

"Shut up, you're making me nervous," my eyes stayed glued on Draco avoiding the ball. "He might deserve it, though."

"What? I thought you might be into that whole rugged look. It's kind of hot, like battle scars—"

"Daphne!" I cut her off, laughing. It was funny, but didn't lessen my anxieties. It had come far too close to him, close enough to strike him. "Don't say things like that, I'm upset with him for that and worried enough as—"

Before I could finish my statement, I was cut off by the panicked "ahhs" of the crowd, making me turn my neck back to the pitch, my eyes scrambling to find the area of contact.

Oh no. Fuck, fuck, fuck... this can't be happening.

When my gaze refocused on what happened, it was clear there hadn't been a winner. The snitch was still in action, but there were no longer two seekers chasing after it. It was now being tailed by a single hunter, one clad in blue with dark hair.

"Malfoy tumbles to the ground, a clear victim of the nasty bludger that he launched at Chang just moments ago!" Lee narrated, the chatter of the crowd making it almost impossible to hear what he said.

We were pressed against the front of the stands, with nobody in front of us and I still felt like I didn't have a clear view of the action. I wanted to rush down there and be beside him, see if he was alright or needed anything. How was I supposed to just return my attention to the game like nothing happened? How was anyone supposed to do that?

His figure sat unmoving for a moment, sprawled on the grass with his broom to his right. I hadn't seen exactly what happened, but judging by how the bludger was laying next to him, I assumed it knocked him straight to the ground, not just off his broom and he fell. If he just lost his balance and fell, he might've shaken it off and attempted to continue. No, the bludger next to him signified that he was attacked by it, all the way to the ground.

"Ravenclaw seeker Cho Chang catches the snitch! With Malfoy out of the way, Chang has a clear opportunity to grab the ball..." Lee's voice trailed off, into nothingness. All white noise to me.

There were a mix of noises coming from the crowd. Ravenclaw cheering, Slytherin booing, but it all meshed together for me. I couldn't differentiate between the two; it was like I could focus on nothing except Draco down there.

He did wrong today, that was something nobody could deny. It was dirty and conniving, underhanded and dangerous, but those thoughts all left my mind once I saw him lying there himself. A few professors had gathered around to check if he needed medical attention. Obviously he did, the boy hadn't stirred since he fell.

Without a second thought, as I knew the game was now over, I pushed and shoved upset Slytherins crowding around the stairs out of the way to make it down to meet him.

Chapter Text

Draco had been rushed to Madam Pomfrey's infirmary wing. I didn't know how long he was there; it felt like hours but in reality must have been forty minutes or so.

She analyzed his physical state and concluded that a couple potions and rest ought to do the trick. He wouldn't be completely recovered for a week probably, but just some cuts, bruises and mild headaches after he woke up, maybe dizziness or disorientation. If there were any other major symptoms, he should go back to the hospital wing for more potions but he would be fine, ultimately.

I knew he would be, but it didn't stop me from worrying. It was no secret quidditch was an inherently dangerous sport, but luckily there was always a spell or concoction that could heal any serious damage. Madam Pomfrey said that Draco was the worst case she'd seen in months, but he still would be fine in due time.

She had given him a vial of something to take after he woke up, groggy and completely disoriented, to help him gain some consciousness back. She predicted that in an hour he should be awake and aware again.

Luckily Blaise and Theo had accompanied me to the hospital with him; I would've resented them if they didn't want to see their friend well. It also meant that there were two people who could help him back to his dorm, since Draco was in no position to be doing so himself.

On the (very slow and tedious) walk back to Theo and Draco's dorm room, he showed little signs of getting back to normal. He'd spring his head up suddenly, murmur a few odd words, or look like he was conscious for a moment before slipping back into that groggy state he was in. He could drag his legs along, but he certainly needed the assistance of the other boys to do so. They made sure each of his arms was around their shoulders as they steadied his balance and kept him upright.

By the time we ended up in the dungeons, he was looking a lot better and more aware, but not fully so. An hour hadn't passed yet, so he was in a state of cloudiness for the most part.

While Madam Pomfrey had given him some potions to heal, he wasn't cleaned up at all. While some magical creams could help, Madam Pomfrey insisted that she couldn't use a spell to disinfect his cuts or wounds since they wouldn't be as effectively cleaned. Magical cleansing always had a rather large margin of error and should only be used for more superficial things. She instructed that it needed to be done the muggle way, for lack of a better term, if he wanted a fuller and more complete cleansing.

We laid him on his bed and there was nothing I wanted to do more than just take a rag and wipe away his cuts before they worsen, but Theo insisted that I wait half an hour or so to make sure he's awake while I do it. If I scared him or a disinfectant stung him in his state of grogginess, it wouldn't end well. "Draco's testy," Theo repeated.

It looked like Draco slipped in and out of sleepiness, too. For a moment, his eyes would close and he'd be sound, then the next his eyes shot open and sounds were coming from his lips. It improved as minutes past, him looking more awake and less sleepy, but he probably just must have been naturally tired from the impact. His head moved around on the pillow, his neck shifting from side to side. He looked awkward and generally uncomfortable, which no doubt was a side effect of the potion Madam Pomfrey gave him which woke him up from his state of unconsciousness.

"How do you guys think he's gonna react when he finds out he lost to Chang?" Blaise snorted, trying to lighten the mood.

"Looks like he won't be at the after-party," Theo chimed in.

"Hopefully that's the least of his problems," I replied, unamused at their banter. I was sat on the bed next to his lying figure and keeping an eye on him, while the boys sat on Theo's bed.

"Or it'll piss him off more," Theo added. "He talked so much shit about how he could beat her with one arm tied behind his back."

"How about a bludger to the head?"

"You guys!" I interjected their boyish banter, the two of them still laughing. "Don't upset him yet. I doubt he wants to hear that as soon as he wakes up."

"The guy can't tell right from left at the moment," Blaise pointed at Draco, who was still looking off. "You think he's gonna be able to know we're talking about him?"

"Still," I replied, "it can't be healthy for him right now."

"You act like you aren't pissed off for what he did to Cho. He might as well know she won after he tried to do to her what happened to him," Theo reasoned.

I sighed, knowing he was right. I couldn't let go of how dirty he played, how I thought he would've done better. But for now I could push that aside. That's a problem, a conversation for another time. One where he's conscious and can have an adult conversation with. The focus right now was that he had to get better and taken care of before discussing his "strategy".

"Of course I'm pissed off about that," I turned to look at him, "but we can lecture him on it later."

"He probably would've gotten disqualified," Blaise shrugged.

"Or at least points taken from Slytherin."

"Some captain you guys voted," I quipped back.

I heard the chatter of the boys continue, still talking about the game. Blaise was benched today due to bad behavior and didn't get to compete so he was riled up for a few reasons, while Theo who actually played was disgustingly sweaty and smelled like a dog.

Looking at Draco, he wasn't any better, but the poor guy had other things to worry about. He had some straggly hairs clinging to his forehead, dampened with perspiration, which were getting in front of his eyes. I brought my hand up to move the hair out of his face which he let out a hum of satisfaction to, making me smile. I ran my fingers down the side of his face, causing him to instinctively lean into me. He seemed a bit more relaxed at the familiar touch, so I let him nuzzle into me.

"Mothering him much, y/n?" Blaise smirked.

"It's not mothering," I defended, "it's just that you sorry lot aren't doing anything, I might as well."

"Yeah, that's it," Theo snorted.

"Why don't you guys go change or something?" I rolled my eyes. "You're not helping."

Theo lifted his arm and sniffed, causing him to cringe at his own stench. "Maybe you're right. Should I..." he gestured toward the bathroom connected to their dorm.

Blaise shook his head. "Just use mine. Something tells me Draco's going to need a shower when he wakes up."

I scoffed. "Finally making yourselves useful."

The boys assured me they'd be back soon enough, hopefully this time with a better attitude and some food. Theo also promised me to stop by my dorm and let Daphne know where I was. She wanted to come and stay with Draco too, but the hospital wing insisted only three people come in at once and we were split up.

Once they left, it was a routine of Draco continuing to slowly regain consciousness. He seemed to be letting out some more words, choppy sentences, or little quips of a sentence. More of his body was shifting around too, not just his neck and head which I assumed was a good sign.

For a moment I thought I might be taking up his personal space, so I got up to let him breathe a bit more. The second my hand left the side of his face he let out a groan of disapproval. I promptly sat back down and continued caressing him, slipping him back into that sense of serenity. It was actually sweet knowing that he liked my touch.

It took a whole twenty minutes of this trend before he actually seemed back to normal, or at least in the state of consciousness that Madam Pomfrey said he would be in. He would still be tired, maybe a bit disoriented or have side effects, but he'd be awake. That he certainly was.

I helped him sit up so his back was against the headboard, now looking at me with a disgruntled look on his face. He brought his hands up to rub his temples, probably missing the head massage I was giving him moments ago.

"I... feel like shit," he choked out, fits of coughing beginning his sentence. He cleared his throat a few times before his voice sounded better.

"You should. You fell pretty hard," I told him, getting up from the bed.

He looked up at me with wide eyes, his eyebrows furrowed. "Where are you going?"

"Madam Pomfrey gave me a few things to clean you up, you're going to need to disinfect those cuts sooner than later."

He sighed audibly, looking more relaxed. He looked back up at me calmly and patted the spot next to him on the bed. "Why don't you sit back down?"

I raised an eyebrow. "You don't want to let those settle, it could worsen—"

"Just stay for a moment," he repeated, his voice pleading.

It was then I realized he didn't care about his physical state, he just wanted some company for the time being.

I granted his request wordlessly, taking a seat next to him. Our shoulders were pressed against each other before he rested his head down on my shoulder. I brought my hand up to rub his neck soothingly as he leaned into me.

"You're looking much better," I prompted quietly. I felt him shrug.

"Wouldn't know. Don't care."

"I can read you the side effects of the potions you've been prescribed. You probably won't be back to yourself for a while. You could try eating something, it would probably energize you a bit..."

I felt his hot breath against my skin before realizing he scoffed. Of course he did, even battered and bruised, he was smug as ever.

"What was that for?" I asked, trying not to let the offense of my voice shine through.

"You're mothering me."

"You too? It was bad enough when Theo and Blaise said it, I just care—"

"It's cute."

I felt my face redden with a blush. I don't think he'd ever called me cute before... no he didn't say I was cute, just what I was doing was cute. Anyhow, this was not the time for me to get excited. The poor guy needed a potion to regain consciousness and I was about to melt in his hands.

"Oh," was all I could muster as a response.

Really, y/n, was that the best you could do?

"I like it," he murmured into my skin before turning his tone a tad more serious. "I can take care of myself though."

"I'm sure you can," I replied, hiding the shakiness of my voice. "But I don't want you to. You just need to relax for a while."

He picked his head up from the spot where he rested against my shoulder and looked at me. Part of me missed the contact before realizing his sullen features.

"I said I can take care of myself." His voice was harder than it had been before. Not mean or antagonizing, but it was trying to assert a certain dominance which I wasn't expecting.

"I have no doubt you can, but you've had a bad day and need to rest. Let me take care of you."

"There's no need," he crossed his arms over his chest. "Let me sit for a couple minutes and I'll be fine. Just need to get in the right headspace."

"You probably won't be in 'the right headspace' for a week, Draco," I informed him, as per Madam Pomfrey's prediction.

His eyebrows furrowed at that. "A week?"

"I told you, I was briefed on the things you should do for a while. I'll help you, it's not a probl—"

"I'll figure it out."

I sighed, not wanting to argue with him while he was feeling like this. Why was he being so argumentative straight away? This was not the time for it. I was offering to give him a hand with things while he was clearly not physically well and he was denying me.

Part of me was tempted to just leave, but I couldn't. I cared about him too much to leave him alone just to make a point.

I was sat by myself for a while he showered. It was a miserable waiting period, twiddling with my thumbs. I knew he'd be fine, considering I didn't let him get up until he looked well enough to at least stand for a short period of time.

I was laid out on his bed, picking my head up when I saw him lean out of the bathroom doorway.

"Have you got the things from the infirmary?" he inquired, looking much more alert after his shower.

I yanked my bag on top of the bed and began rummaging through it. I pulled out a few potions, creams, as well as muggle solutions to the problem. I didn't think Draco would use them if he knew it was plain old muggle rubbing alcohol and not a magical remedy, so I made sure to slip the label off while he was in the shower.

By the time Draco came over, he was wearing some gray sweatpants and a loose fitting black shirt that I'm sure was just the first thing he pulled out of his dresser. He sat down on the bed and tried figuring out the usages for all of the things I had scattered about.

His fingers traced the outlines of the bottles, tubes, vials, while his eyes narrowed in an attempt to focus on whatever he was reading. I took the opportunity to observe his state.

He looked much fresher and cleaner, however it worried me that he had reopened the wounds. The hot water of the shower made his naturally pale skin turn pink, almost like he was blushing. He had various cuts on his arms, cheeks, neck, and a few bruises that were starting to turn a dark purple color. The cuts he had also looked fresh and red, like a knife had made little slices on his delicate skin and were tempting to ooze out some blood. The heat from the shower must have opened them a bit more.

He had a mirror across from his bed and tried to use it to the best of his ability to clean himself. He poured some of the rubbing alcohol (unbeknownst to him) on a cotton ball and dabbed it on a cut he had on his wrist. He grimaced with an audible hissing sound at the contact.

"Stings?" I asked, looking down at his balled up fist. The veins of his wrist were accentuated and looked thicker than normal, popping out as they disappeared up the rest of his forearm.

He nodded, but moved onto the next. The second cut was larger, indicating a more intense pain when the alcohol would come in contact.

This routine of his was short and ineffective; it was like it hurt too much for him to apply the proper amount and he'd move onto the next one too quickly.

"Let me help you," I finally insisted, moving closer to him and reaching for a cloth.

He pulled his arm back defensively, a silent argument that he could do it himself. I ignored it, reaching further to where I finally grasped it. I repositioned him so that we were sat across from each other on his bed. I sat with my legs crossed, just a few inches from him. His legs were spread out comfortably, which I took my place in between to get close enough to his body to inspect.

"This isn't necessary for you to do," he grumbled, looking annoyed. Almost like a child having a fit, he huffed and blew a few strands of hair out of his face.

"I know." I looked up at him before reaching for his forearm.

I took the disinfectant and applied it to his wounds. His skin seemed to... tremble. But not from the alcohol, he had a different reaction to that. After I applied it, he would ball up his fists then release his tense muscles a moment later. His hands however trembled with the slightest shakiness for a reason I couldn't pinpoint. It worsened the more I touched him.

He stayed silent for a while and I didn't bother to start the conversation.

I couldn't tell you what was running through his mind, but he had an expression of distress on his face the whole time. His eyebrows were scrunched and his lip sneered.

I didn't want to push him if he wasn't feeling up to it, however he did find his voice to speak up eventually. I let him take his time.

"Are you embarrassed?"

I looked up and raised an eyebrow. What was he talking about? Admittedly, he did a lot of questionable things today but I couldn't figure exactly what he was referring to. I wanted to be careful about my word choice, keeping in mind his state, but I also was still annoyed with him for his behavior in a multitude of ways.

"Embarrassed about what?" I continued tending to his cuts.

"Me. Losing the game."

That's what he was referencing? Sure, I was upset with the way he lost, but not that he lost in general. I wanted to roll my eyes, scoff at his tone deafness for intentionally hurting an opponent, but that would be harsh. Oh, how I wanted to, though.

"Everyone loses now and then."

He sighed, clenching his fist again. "But you were watching. Didn't you want to see me win?"

"I like when our house wins, but it's not the end of the worl—"

"You're not following. I asked, didn't you want to see me win?"

I cocked my head as I analyzed his words. Him? Of course I wanted to see him succeed, for a number of reasons. I didn't know why he cared what I thought about that though.

"Sure," I shrugged, "I would've preferred if you lost on better terms, though."

"Better terms?"

I didn't want to bring it up, but the conversation was headed that way inevitably.

"What you did to Cho," I explained. "It was awful, Draco."

He shook his head. "It was killer instinct."

"Yeah, 'killer' indeed," I dryly scoffed. "Draco, you almost really hurt her. The way you are now could've been her."

"Should've been her, too."

"How could you say that?"

The offense in my voice was more audible, slipping out unintentionally. Genuinely, did he have no remorse?

"I wanted to win," he furrowed his brows. "Sometimes you do what you have to do. Even risking a point drop, it would've been recorded that I caught the snitch."

"You're the team captain, you must know better than to act so dangerously," I tried to reason, "throwing a bludger at your opponent isn't fair game."

"Tell that to the beaters."

"You're not a beater! It was out of bounds and not your position. From the way you threw it at her, she would've been out cold for days."

He shifted uncomfortably, his lip sneering out of annoyance.

"But she isn't."

"Thank Merlin, she isn't. You got off way better than what would've happened to her and you know it."

"Can't you leave it alone? She's fine, I'm fine..."

"That doesn't make the situation fine. Draco, you should know better. I know you know better. Why cheat your way to a win?"

"Why does it matter to you how I plan strategy? A win is a win, isn't it?"

I glared at him. I pressed the alcohol into his wounds a bit harder than I should've, causing him to wince. I knew he knew it was intentional.

"It's not the same thing, Draco. Winning fair and square is right, but you... it was disappointing."

"Disappointing?"

His eyes widened a bit and I took the opportunity to stare at them for a second. They were grayer than usual, the bluer tone of them void. It was kind of grim, seeing eyes you've grown to find so much solace and comfort in looking so depressing.

"Disappointing that you resorted to such cheap tactics to win a stupid game."

I promptly finished cleaning up his arm wounds and moved up to his face. He had quite a few cuts, much less severe than on his hands but they still marred his otherwise pretty face. Being someone of high status, it was no secret Draco had a perfect complexion and soft skin. It was an ugly reality check to see his physical state having changed and scarred so much after today.

"It's not stupid," he murmured.

"It's not worth it to seriously hurt someone, is what I'm saying. It's stupid that you cared that much to do that to her."

"Of course I cared. I... I'm the team captain."

I gave him a bored expression. That was a lame excuse and he knew it. Like hell would a team captain who cares about the sport risk a disqualification for that. His shifty eyes indicated that he was aware of that fact.

It seemed like he couldn't hold my gaze, so I forced him to meet my eyes every time I cleaned another cut. I'd use my fingers to tilt his head to make eye contact, which he instinctively reciprocated.

"Fine," he huffed, "it was wrong. But in the moment... I didn't really care."

"Why, though? You're an amazing seeker, I've seen it. There's no point for you to play like that. You could've won on merit."

"You think I'm an amazing seeker?" he echoed, his lips slightly parting in a surprised expression.

"Of course that's the part you pick up on," I scoffed. "But you know I do. You're probably the best out of all the houses, on raw talent anyway."

"Raw talent... that would mean my skills just aren't refined," he sighed.

"Evidently not," I moved onto another wound.

I could tell his neck was tense as I cleaned a cut near his collarbone. He had a vein popping out, like on his arm earlier. It was prominent and dark, standing out among his pale skin.

My fingers brushed against the silver chain he wore around his neck, only now realizing that he had it on. That same one from quidditch practice, I assumed.

"I'll do better next time," he looked down, clearly uncomfortable.

"That's not good enough, Draco. You can't act like that and expect to get away with it."

"How have I gotten away with it? I got knocked out during the game and woke up in the hospital wing."

"You know what I mean. Merlin, you're difficult."

The two of us sat in a sort of silence after that. I didn't mean to insult him, but I was growing tired of his self defense. Even when he admitted it was wrong, he still seemed like he thought it could be brushed under the table.

My fingers reached for the chain of his necklace to get better access to one of his cuts. His hand grabbed my wrist, gently but with intent, causing me to stop.

"Is this like your good luck charm or something?" I inquired, my fingers picking up the chain.

"You could say that," he breathed out. "Just don't move it."

I nodded, tending to his wound without taking the necklace off. It made it more inconvenient, but if he wanted it on, I was in no position to argue with him.

"You know," he started, his voice seemingly a bit shakier than it was a moment ago. It had a twinge to it I hadn't heard before.

"What?" I asked, my eyes meeting his.

"I... wish I would've won."

I rolled my eyes. "Really, Draco? That's what you're think—"

"Let me finish," he interrupted, suddenly gaining back a bit of morale.

I nodded, still annoyed but letting him continue.

"I wanted to win... because.... you would've been proud of me."

My lips parted slightly. What was he talking about? I must have had a confused expression on my face, since I couldn't think of what to say. His features were tense, but not necessarily upset looking. It was like he was trying to get some point across or was being serious somehow, but not being clear enough.

"Proud... how? I would've been happy even if you lost, as long as it was fair."

"I know, and... I'm an idiot. I guess in that moment I just... wanted to impress you."

I felt my skin instantly get hot, feeling my cheeks swell with a blush. I hoped it wasn't obvious, but how could it not have been? As upset as I was with him, I still had feelings that weren't going to disappear when he did something wrong.

Hearing that he wanted to impress me actually made me smile a bit. Small, but the ends of my lips undoubtedly curled up a little. It was kind of comforting knowing that he was, in his own sick and twisted way, thinking of me still. I hated myself for finding the good in that sentiment.

"That wasn't the way to impress me," I replied, my voice surprisingly unwavering.

Draco scoffed, annoyed. Where had he gotten a surge of confidence?

"Don't you think I know that?"

"Clearly not."

"Trust me, after all the shit I've done to make this work, I should know by now what impresses you."

My features turned into an expression of shock at that. What was he talking about? Impressing me? There was no way he was referencing what I thought he was. And if he was?

"Draco... what are—"

"Don't," he cut me off, waving his hand dismissively. "I'm upset enough as it is, I can't explain how I've fucked everything up again."

"You haven't fucked anything up? What you did was wrong but it doesn't change—"

"Yes, it does change things between us, y/n. I feel like I can't compete, everything I do to make you fucking notice me goes wrong."

His tone was direct, but not aggressive necessarily. Not with me, anyway. His sudden burst of emotion seemed to be directed at himself.

I couldn't explain how much it confused me and sent my feelings in a flurry of emotions hearing what he was saying. Notice him? How could I not notice him? Was I not showing an interest back? If there was any doubt in his mind I felt something for him, I had to clear it up.

I didn't care what he did was wrong, and maybe he doesn't care either. But that could be saved for another day. How was I going to show that I've been noticing him?

"It's like everything I do, every time we make progress is set back by me screwing something up," he rambled, gazing into my eyes. I didn't even know if he knew what he was saying at that point. "How many nights I've spent trying to plan the next time we'll speak? What jokes I can crack to make you laugh? Things for us to do to make you... smile? I always fuck it up—"

Draco shut up finally.

He needed to stop speaking, since he clearly didn't know what he was talking about.

No words I could say would stop him from whatever rant he was on.

My lips on his got the point across.

Chapter Text

"Are you interested in going shopping this afternoon?" Daphne asked, looking up from her book.

"I don't know, Daph. I'm busy," I shrugged with a crooked smile.

"Ah, you've been saying that for a week straight. I've been needing a good shopping spree."

"I know, but I've got to help Draco. Bring me something back if you want."

Daphne rolled her eyes, tossing the book across the bed. "You've been 'helping Draco' for... how many days now? Far too many, y/n."

"What's that supposed to insinuate?"

She smirked. "You two finally have a proper relationship. I'm guessing you're doing a lot more than just getting his assignments and meals, right?"

I looked down at my lap and blushed to myself. She was right.

Of course, I told her that we kissed that day after the quidditch game. Not just kissed, but seriously kissed. It was a culmination of all the emotions we'd both been seemingly feeling so strongly. Every time I closed my eyes I could still feel his skin against me and how it felt to have his lips caress mine.

I caught him off guard, but he wasn't disappointed. We parted for just a moment, to look each other in the eyes, as if to silently agree that we both wanted whatever was happening between us. It wasn't a spur of the moment decision; the kiss, yes it was unplanned, but the feelings we had been long overdue a confession.

Once he got the confirmation from my gaze that I was interested, he kissed me again. It started softly, pressing his lips to mine and gently moving in sync. It was like we were getting to know each other all over again. It couldn't be rushed, or something would go wrong. We knew between the two of us that something always seemed to go wrong; this would not be one of those times. It needed to be done slowly at first, soak in as much of the feeling as we could before it would advance.

And advance, it did.

As much as I enjoyed the soft, loving kisses that clearly were trying to make a good impression and express care, we both wanted more. It had to be done; we ached for it. Draco's hands, although bruised and sore, moved their way around my waist and I (trying to avoid his injuries as best I could) wrapped mine around his neck. The kisses became hungrier, exploring the insides of each other's mouths to the fullest extent.

It wasn't sloppy; if anything, the opposite. It was just passionate, conveying as much desire as possible while maintaining some composure. His hands roamed up and down, paying my hips particular attention as he seemed to grab them as best as he could. His long, cold fingers dug into my skin and left it hot for once, rather than chilled. My hands seemed to find a comfortable place in his blonde locks, slightly tugging on them and eliciting soft hums of approval from him in return.

Every so often we'd pull away for a moment, just to look at each other again. It was glorious: the sight of him with reddened plumped lips and messy hair was something to behold. It made me flutter with a sensual happiness that I was the one that made him look like that. The grin on his face, not malicious or troublesome, but out of breathlessness made it all the more enjoyable.

If it weren't for Theo and Blaise coming back, we could've stayed there for Merlin knows how long. Speaking of which, only Merlin knows how many times I've replayed the memory of us back over again.

In terms of the week after, it had been a similar, but less intense experience. We stole many kisses (some more passionate than others) over the course of a few days, but it never escalated into anything unhinged or too wild for any reason. I told myself it was probably because Theo or Blaise could walk in at any moment, but I couldn't be sure.

Most days while Draco was still recovering, I'd pop into his room with a basket of food and we'd spend time together. Usually he'd lie down between my legs on the bed and end up falling asleep, or I'd do the same on his chest. I found out this week that he had a particular attachment to chocolate covered strawberries. More specifically, being fed chocolate covered strawberries.

Our conversations lacked substance, usually. Sometimes we'd discuss books or our friends, maybe a little gossip here and there. But it wasn't serious chat, if anything we just basked in each other's presence. Most of it was silent, even. It was comfortable.

He had finally gotten better, though, and the excuse that he was resting wouldn't cut it anymore. The teachers would expect him back in class fully functioning again and I couldn't skip out with my friends to "take care" of him anymore. Anyone who saw him knew that apart from some fading bruises or cuts, the boy was fine again. He was even planning on going back to quidditch practices.

Part of me was worried that we wouldn't get to spend as much time together anymore. I loved just being with him, physically but also on a similar emotional page. We hadn't necessarily talked about what we were or how we felt about each other; Draco preferred physical means of conveying his emotions. It was nice and the touch or kisses sent away my doubtful thoughts, but never for long. I wanted to hear from his lips how he felt, but it never came to fruition.

I couldn't really blame him, though. I never said anything to him either. It was just a myriad of being pressed up against each other, cuddling till it was too hot and we had to get rid of the blankets, and clinging onto each other like we were afraid the other would let go.

"You two are going to have to become public sooner or later. Everyone already knows it, y/n."

"Who's 'everyone'? I doubt that."

"Draco doesn't just spend time with anyone, let alone defend or obsess over them the way he does with you. Trust me, that boy even after getting knocked off his broomstick, has 'lovesick puppy' written all over his face."

"You're just saying that since you know what's been going on."

"Maybe. But even if I'm wrong, wouldn't you want people knowing that you're together?"

"I suppose I would, but it's not definite yet. I don't know how he feels... we haven't really had that conversation."

"You haven't?"

"Is it something we should've discussed?"

She rolled her eyes, almost looking offended. "All you did for months was talk. Now you finally are together, more or less, and your relationship is the one thing you haven't talked about?"

I furrowed my eyebrows. She was right, actually. It took me a moment to consider what she meant, but she was correct regardless. For so long all we did was talk, tease, sort of torture each other in whatever limbo relationship we had. Oddly enough the one thing we didn't discuss, at least not presently, was this.

"No, we haven't. I mean... I'm sure we will eventually. I don't want to push him."

She scoffed. "That boy has been waiting ages for you to give him the time of day. If you think this is pushing him, I would hate to see you playing hard to get."

———

"Feeling alright?" I asked, walking into Draco's dorm. He was lying down on his bed, but promptly rolled up when he saw me. His eyes lit up and he seemed to become animated rather quickly.

He walked over with a smirk and softly kissed me. "Never better," he hummed against my lips.

He wrapped his arms around my waist, briefly deepening the kiss. I felt him smirk against me, the telltale signs of his happiness that I'd grown familiar with this past week. His thumbs rubbed little circles on the exposed part of my skin where he had slightly slipped under my shirt an inch or so.

"Don't worry, Theo's not here. Quidditch practice," he leaned in for another kiss, but I turned my head away.

"For real," I continued once he pulled back. He had a dreamy look in his eyes, kind of like he was entranced. The goofy grin he wore said it all. "You're doing alright enough to come back to classes?"

"I don't want to, this past week has been... nicer than I imagined," he smirked, making me blush. "But I've gotta do what I've gotta do."

"You're starting tomorrow?" I raised a brow.

He shook his head. "Classes tomorrow; quidditch today."

"You're sure about training again? You could always take another week off—"

"Don't stress, y/n. It's cute you're concerned, though," he smiled to himself.

"I didn't say I was concerned," I lightly laughed, teasing him. "Maybe I was just trying to keep you away from our group longer. It's much more peaceful."

"Is that so? I happen to know you find it much more interesting when I'm there and make you flustered—"

"Point taken," I laughed, causing him to do the same.

"For real, though. I haven't left this room in a week and I've got cabin fever. If I don't start doing something again, I might go crazy."

"I thought you liked this past week?" I smirked.

"The company? Yes," he smirked back, "but I could do with a change of atmosphere."

I reached for his hand to intertwine our fingers but he let ours slip away from each other. I didn't want to show my disappointment, but I felt a little rejected.

"I'm actually off to the quidditch pitch right now, if you'd want to come along. Don't have to, but if you'd want to study or something..."

My worries left my mind. Thank God, he was just busy and wasn't wanting affection at the moment. He was so mixed about that sort of thing.

"Sure," I nodded. "I have some parchments to finish anyway. Plus, I've got to make sure you don't get into anymore trouble."

He grinned again, that sly smirk on his lips again. "I was hoping you'd say that. I think I try a little harder when I know you're watching."

"Just don't throw a bludger at anyone this time."

"Don't be crazy," he rolled his eyes. "I only do that to people from other houses."

———

I didn't care how many times I watched Draco play quidditch, it was the most attractive thing to me. Apart from the fact I was slightly on edge after his accident, it was so enjoyable watching him play. During the week he talked quite a bit about how he missed playing and I could tell based on how he acted during practice. It was hungrier, almost, or like he had something to prove. Maybe to his team that he wasn't a screwup, despite losing them the game.

I didn't think they thought that. If anything, they might've even been proud of him. I disapproved of their cheating tactics during the games, but to their merit, they certainly had a fraternity about them. Their brotherhood made them thick as thieves, which in many ways, they already were. I don't think that they minded one bit he lost to Cho, apart from some initial annoyance. They were just happy their captain was back to playing. They probably would've ended up losing anyway; might as well go out with a bang.

The practice was long. I did some homework, then hung out with Draco, Theo, and Blaise during their breaks. Some of the other boys came and went, or stayed for a moment then went on their way to continue whatever they were doing.

The only issue I had was that Draco was seemingly... distant.

In his defense, it was the first time we'd all been together as a group since he got had his accident and since we've been more intimate, but when the rest of the group was together he didn't pay much attention to me. In fact, he hardly paid me any attention.

He sat far away from me and hardly looked in my direction. The only time we really made eye contact was when he was talking to the group as a whole. The passing of his eyes would linger on me for a moment before turning his attention back to whoever else he was chatting with or entertaining the group with a story.

I liked seeing him so happy and carefree with his friends, but it was odd he paid me even less attention than he did before. I tried not to take it personally, but why bother inviting me to watch him play if he didn't bother to speak to me?

"Whatcha reading there?" Theo peered over my shoulder, looking down at the book in my lap.

"Researching for this new charm," I shrugged. "Nothing interesting."

"Damn, forgot about that. Isn't it supposed to be mastered by the end of the week?"

"Yeah," I nodded. "It's meant for defensive purposes but can be used offensively in certain scenarios."

He grimaced. "Looks like I know how I'll be spending my afternoon. Care to tutor me?"

I chuckled, shaking my head. "Not going to be too tired? We know what happened last time—"

"I can tutor you, Theo," Draco cut me off, somewhat to my annoyance. "Y/n's probably got better things to do."

"No, it's fine," I assured, looking between the two of them. "I'll be over later anyway."

Draco and I had planned for dinner later in the night, so it really wouldn't be any problem.

Theo looked at me with his eyebrows raised. "You will be? I don't remember us planning anything."

"Oh," I looked up at Draco, slightly pointing. "We were just—"

"I said I can help you, Theo. You've been such a help this past week anyway, I should return the favor," Draco insisted.

I furrowed my eyebrows, really feeling confused now. There was no reason for Draco to act coy, especially around Theo. If it weren't for him, Draco and I wouldn't even be "together" now, or whatever we are. In fact, he's been our number one supporter, or perhaps only second to Daphne.

"Oh," Theo sighed, "that might not be such a bad idea. I deserve some payment after bringing you your morning tea for five days straight."

"Precisely," Draco warily smiled, awkward and unsure. "Maybe we should get back to practice?"

This trend of Draco's odd behavior continued for the rest of the day. It was strange; I couldn't put my finger on it.

When in group settings, he hardly looked at me, or even just with his closer friends he still almost outright ignored me. However, when we had even a second alone together, his demeanor changed entirely.

All of a sudden when the boys had left for the locker room and it was us just outside the door, he pressed me up against the building and stole repeated kisses, like he had been waiting all practice for his fill. I gladly obliged him, but I couldn't deny that the feeling he left me with afterward made me uneasy.

Once he came back out of the locker room with his friends, it was back to hardly noticing me. It was Theo who had to even offer to walk me back to my dorm since Draco headed off with Blaise and Adrian.

"I'm not blind, you know," Theo smirked, as he escorted me down to my room.

"Blind?" I huffed. I must have looked annoyed, and I was. Draco's hot and cold behavior was not something I was willing to tolerate.

"He's been acting up," he explained. "I don't know why he won't admit it, but there's obviously finally something with you and Draco."

"How could you tell? He hasn't told you, though?"

"Hasn't said a thing. But he's been too happy lately, and that can only mean you're involved."

Chapter Text

"Remember to have your essays on my desk no later than Friday morning. I'll have them graded by Monday classes," Slughorn explained to the class.

"Will we be able to calculate our final term grade based on those marks?" Granger spoke up from a table on the other side of the room. I rolled my eyes.

"Yes, you may. Also, to those of you doing exceptionally well in this class: this is the final essay before the Christmas holidays and if you have a current Outstanding mark in the class, you'll be excused from the final."

A few whispers could be heard from around the class at the possibility of skipping the final; that would be so nice to not worry about studying. Where was my grade? I think the last time I calculated it, I had somewhere between an Outstanding or Exceeds Expectations.

"That's rubbish!" Theo yelped from the table I sat at. "Why do you need an Outstanding—"

"Oh, Mr. Nott, maybe this'll encourage you to work a bit harder next term after the break," Slughorn peered over at him, making Theo slump in his seat like a child. He huffed audibly.

I snorted with a laugh, causing Theo to glare at me. "Sorry, Theo. I'm sure most people will be taking the final anyway, it's unlikely anyone except for Granger actually has an Outstanding."

"And Draco, lucky bastard," Theo slumped further down, his arms crossed over his chest.

"Shh, no need to put me in the same category as Granger," Draco shivered next to me before smirking. "But for your information, yes, I happen to be something of a potions master."

"And something of a pompous asshole," Theo added, making me laugh.

"Says the one who's barely passing this class," Draco rolled his eyes.

"I happen to be on the cusp of an Outstanding and Exceeds Expectations, thank you very much," Theo retorted. "I'm just annoyed I'm, like, one percent away from skipping the final."

"Your paper better be excellent, then," I looked over at him.

"At least we have a break after..." Theo sighed, before sitting up straight again, suddenly engaged again. "Hey, speaking of, what are you two doing for Christmas?"

Draco and I exchanged glances, both of us knowing but not wanting to be the first to speak up.

His attitude had been slightly warmer, but still the same for a while now. I was quite fed up with being treated like a secret, even though I suppose that I was the one at first who wanted everything hushed up. He wouldn't even touch me when someone else was around, but in private acted like he was entitled to all of my attention and touch for however long we were together. It sometimes made me not want to interact with him when we were together, just out of annoyance.

"Well," Draco cleared his throat. "We're, uh, hosting that Christmas Eve party."

"It's at my family's home, though," I made sure to make clear.

"Now it's kind of both— I mean, yeah, it's at y/n's," Draco looked down.

"Right," Theo nodded. "I forgot I'm meant to be there. At least my break won't be totally boring then."

"Excuse me, Mr. Nott, am I interrupting your social planning?" Slughorn asked, walking over to our table. Theo went red in the face, making me chuckle.

"Just discussing the essay, sir," he put on a fake smile.

Slughorn rolled his eyes. "Mm, yes, and the holiday break, no doubt. Focus on your studies, young Nott, and you'd have an Outstanding to skip the final."

Theo opened his mouth to reply, but quickly shut up. Probably for the best.

"Class dismissed," Slughorn turned back to address the rest of the class. "I'll be at my desk if you have any questions."

Students started to shuffle out of the classroom, staggering out in pairs, trios, some lonely singles. A couple kids congregated up at Slughorn's desk.

Theo scoffed. "I'm going to speak with him about my grade. Hopefully he's lenient enough to bump me up a percent to get to Outstanding."

Draco leaned closer to him and whispered, "Invite him to your father's next gala. He'll like that."

Theo nodded, eyes widened like he hadn't thought of that before. "Not a bad idea. Slughorn loves a good connection..."

I packed up my bag, thinking that Draco and I would be waiting for Theo to finish speaking with the professor and leaving all together. However, once I'd finished putting away my things, I felt Draco grab my arm and yank me out of the class. This wasn't uncommon at this point, however I couldn't say it was my favorite thing.

As per usual, I was dragged out into the broom closet next to Slughorn's class and pressed up against the door. Draco's lips were on mine, his hands roaming my body like he was touch starved and desperate for any skin contact he could get. I felt his frustration that we had our robes on, since he groaned against my lips after his fingers looked for any skin peeking out around my hips. I felt him frown but continued to ravage my mouth while he got his fill.

After a few moments, he finally pulled back and rested his forehead against mine. He pressed another kiss to my lips before whispering, "I've been waiting all class to do that."

"I had a feeling," I replied, trying to put some distance between us. It was dark, but I didn't need to see his face to know he was upset at that. He never liked when I tried to ward him off, even the tiniest bit.

"What's the matter? You've been... off, for a while," he asked, his fingers tracing my face and down my neck, gently.

"I'm not 'off', Draco. We just had class, I wasn't in the mood for a makeout session right now," I explained.

Maybe I would've been, but when you don't do any more than brush your fingers against mine when you hand me a book in class, it's hard to get the feeling that you're wanted. It was like he forgot how to flirt now that he knew I wanted him too. I missed knowing that he was trying to make an effort in getting me to notice him, or how his eyes would linger a moment too long in class.

Maybe that was selfish in wanting him to keep trying, but I didn't like how he could essentially ignore me then expect me to be at his beck and call whenever. The only time he showed me any affection now was when he knew there was nobody around.

"Let's go back to my dorm, then. We can have some time alone between us; Theo's got another class so we don't have to worry about anyone—"

"You're missing the point, Draco," I shook my head. "I've got studying to do, anyway... I'll just see you later."

I reached for the door handle, but he beat me to it, intertwining our fingers and pulling me up to kiss him once more. He lowered his voice again, and in the darkened room I swore I could still see the light reflect off his gray eyes for a brief moment.

"I just got you. Don't make me start missing you so soon."

"I'm not going anywhere, Draco, I'm just entitled to want some atte— nothing, don't worry about it."

"What is it, y/n? Tell me, and I can do something about it. After all I've done to get to this point, I'm not backing out now."

I suppose he was right, but it still didn't add up. He had no business in acting like he was even less interested in me than he used to be, then wanting all my physical attention when we had a moment alone. Many of those moments being ones that he forcibly made, not naturally happening.

"If I really have to tell you then it's not going to help."

He chose not to respond, just shaking his head and promptly leaving the broom closet.

I didn't really have any studying to do, but I was so turned off by his general behavior that I was in no mood to fraternize with him. Not like that, yanking me into a broom closet and kissing me like I was some secret. An affair. Something to keep hidden.

Sure, I wanted to keep us private when we first were married, but that was because I didn't want it to happen. I was avoiding humiliation and the reality that we were together. Now this? Didn't he have any idea that treating me like a mistress wasn't appealing?

I tried to take my mind off it and waited outside Slughorn's for Theo to come back. He eventually did, a few minutes later with a neutral look on his face.

"Any luck?" I asked, following him wherever he was off to. I assumed back to Slytherin house.

"Just with my essay, I guess. It better be one for the books."

"It will be. I can help you, if you'd like. Just that extra set of eyes that might catch something or want to add things."

He shook his head. "I got it. But your Christmas party better be great, I need to let off some steam after this."

"You know it's not that type of party," I chuckled.

"Right, it's going to be slowly drank cocktails and a string band and fancy decorations—"

"It's not like I'm planning it; my mother is," I nudged him.

"Draco's mother isn't?"

"She'll be... helping. Don't bring up Draco right now, I need a break from him."

He raised his eyebrows, looking confused. "You do? I knew something was up with you guys, but still? What's the matter?"

"Nothing, really. He's just being annoying."

"Well, that's obvious. But what's he done now?"

I laughed at that, before looking back up at him. "He's very... secretive. Like he doesn't want anyone knowing about us."

"I thought you didn't want anyone knowing about you guys?"

I rolled my eyes. "That was before when we weren't into each other. Things are... different now."

"I can see that. It looks like he's restraining himself around you. He used to look like such a lovesick puppy, now he's back to normal. Well, as normal as Draco can be."

"So you see it too? That's exactly it. It's like he's bottling up whatever he's feeling then lets it all out at once. It makes me feel like he doesn't want anyone knowing about us."

Theo hummed for a moment. "Trust me, I think Draco would scream at the rooftops that you're together if he could. There's got to be something else."

———

My apologies for whatever I've done to upset you. Hopefully this brightens your day a little.

Tout mon amour,

D. Malfoy

"Really, Draco?" I asked, walking into his room.

He was lying on the bed, reading a book when I came in and he scrambled to get up.

"Whoa, whoa, y/n, what's the matter?"

I tossed the diamond bracelet and note he gave me back at him. He caught it just barely; it would be terrible if he dropped something that pretty, even if I was upset with him.

"This better not be the way you think you resolve problems."

"You didn't like the bracelet?" he frowned, holding it between his fingers.

"I'm not saying I didn't like it," I huffed, "I didn't like you sent it as an apology. That's not the way to get over things."

"It's not like it cost anything for me, y/n. I could give you a hundred of these without thinking—"

"That's really not helping your case, Draco."

He went red in the face. It was then he realized he probably made the situation worse than it was, despite not knowing what exactly he did.

"I just... thought you needed some confirmation."

"Confirmation?"

"Assurance, I mean. How I feel about you."

I fought the urge to roll my eyes. I know how he feels about me, that's not the issue. But how could I be okay with his lack of affection and be expected to turn it around whenever he wants?

"Draco, this isn't the way you give assurance. You do that through other things... words, thoughtfulness."

"Y/n, why don't you sit down and we can talk about whatever's upset you? I'm sorry; I would've done better if I knew what the problem was from the beginning," he sat back on the edge of the bed and gestured to the spot next to him.

"I don't know if it's worth it to discuss," I shook my head, but he reached for my hand and pulled me down on his lap suddenly. I gasped at the sudden contact, but his grasp around my waist tightened before I could move.

"If it's bothering you, it's worth it to discuss," he whispered.

By that point, the proximity of our bodies so close to each other had me almost trembling. The seriousness in his eyes grayed them out, lacking the blue hue they typically had. His arms around me were necessary to keep me in place, otherwise I would've slipped out of his grasp due to nerves.

He brought one hand up to lightly trace my face and push a few hairs behind my ear, his face clearly with concern. It was almost tender, the way he caressed me with such gentleness. Even though he pulled me on him quite quickly without notice, he clearly was trying to make me feel comforted.

"Tell me what's troubling you."

"It's just... us getting used to this whole thing. The adjustment period," I choked out, rather unconvincingly by how he shook his head.

"Don't give me that. Tell me the real reason. Have I done something to upset you?"

"I don't think you've done it intentionally," I assured him.

"So I have done something," he sighed, his grasp on my waist tightening.

"Well, yes. It's what's been bothering me for a little while now."

I waited for a response from him, but never got one. He just lightly nodded his head, urging me to continue on. He pursed his lips almost like he was unsure.

"Have you noticed the difference in how we act together?"

He furrowed his eyebrows, looking confused. His eyes searched mine, looking for some personal confirmation.

"Act?" he repeated. "I'm afraid I don't follow."

I sighed. "When we're together, just the two of us. Compare that with how we act with our friends out in public, in the common room or wherever. You couldn't tell how we feel about each other based on that."

"It's not anyone's business what we are to each other," he stated, his voice hardening a little.

"I know," I breathed out, "that doesn't mean we have to act so different, though."

His eyebrows tugged together again, eyes narrowing. "You mean to say you... want to act like that? The way we do when it's just us?"

I hesitated, but nodded. I was a bit nervous of his reaction, but his features relaxed once he knew that was what I wanted.

"I haven't been ignoring you, have I?" he asked.

It was bad timing, but I chuckled a little. It actually lightened the mood a bit, causing him to appear more calm. "You could say that," I smiled small. He must have been hurt by that admittance, but the better mood of the conversation lessened its impact.

He pulled me closer to him in a tight hug, nuzzling his face into the crook of my neck. Since I was sat on his lap, I was a few inches taller than him which allowed him easy access for a close cuddle.

"Forgive me, love," he mumbled into my skin. The vibrations of his voice traveled through me, causing me to shiver the slightest bit.

"I should've said something to you before," I added once we pulled back the slightest bit to look at each other. I ran my fingers through his hair, which he seemed to find solace in.

"I just thought it was what you wanted. You insisted we keep it secret for so long that..." his voice trailed.

"I know, but that was before," I nodded. "Things are different now."

The ends of his lips tugged up in a smirk. He was clearly content with my change of heart.

"That's music to my ears, y/n," he nuzzled back into me, peppering light kisses on my neck which caused me to giggle. His thin lips pressing kisses into the sensitive part of my shoulder up to my ear tickled a little, which he seemed to find entertainment in seeing me squirm.

Once his short-lived assault on my neck finished, he looked at me longingly. I raised my eyebrows as if to ask why the sudden change in demeanor.

"You must've felt so neglected," he realized, a look of concern washing over him again.

I made sure to shake my head quickly to negate any bad thoughts he was having about himself. "Think nothing of it," I leaned down to kiss his lips quickly. "It was my fault for not telling you."

"All I wanted was for you to be happy," he rushed out, "I thought you wanted it to be secret and I didn't want to push you into anyth—"

I shut him up with another kiss, this time he responded to it more properly. Our mouths moved in a sensitive but passionate sync, like we were reaffirming our feelings for each other. Even if we've never had that conversation, our kiss did the talking. It had a gentleness to it, but didn't hold back on letting its intentions be known.

"You're not pushing me into anything."

"Good. Because you don't know how hard it's been fighting the urge to kiss you every minute."

Chapter Text

"Don't stress. You've done this a million times," Draco whispered into my ear as I snuggled in closer to him. His arm that was around my waist tightened to provide some comfort for me which I was so desperately aching for.

"That doesn't make it any easier."

"At least exams are over, and you aced them all," he smiled. "You should be proud of yourself; I know I am."

"Coming from the man who got to skip half of his finals because his grades were so high, that means a lot," I sarcastically replied, earning a chuckle from him.

"Very funny, y/n, they're our parents. How many times have we faced them?"

"Yeah, but not together. Not like this anyway."

He sighed, knowing I was right. He looked out the window of the train, taking in the sights to perhaps calm himself down too. My eyes followed his, landing on giant masses of white snow that all blurred into just one moving picture. I found little comfort in the fast moving vision of white and decided that my attention would be better suited to Draco.

"It's not like they'd be upset. If anything they'll be happy that it's worked out this way between us."

"Happy for themselves, you mean. More so happy that it worked out for their arrangement."

"Don't say that, y/n. Try to have a positive outlook on the situation and just be happy that we're together after all this."

I stayed silent, but wanted to bring up the fact that we weren't necessarily "together". Sure, we were married, but we could be married and hate each other like we did before. We haven't talked about our feelings for each other, despite how we physically displayed it through kisses and contact, we hadn't had the conversation about what was going on.

It was strange, really. It was essentially dating someone you're forced to be with forever. Whether or not it works out doesn't matter; you're stuck with them.

It was the experimental period of whether we were compatible.

I didn't want to confess to our parents we were seeing each other. "Seeing" was a stupid word considering our marriage, but I didn't know what else to call it. I feared that if I told my parents that we were romantically interested in each other, they'd pat themselves on the back and claim the arranged marriage was a huge success. Next thing I knew, all of our other friends would be thrown in arranged marriages that would be doomed to implode.

If it didn't work out, I'd be screwed there, too. Especially if I told them that we were seeing each other, they'd be even more upset if I somehow ran crying to my mother about how Draco and I weren't meant for each other. There'd be no solution; he'd still be my husband at the end of the day, regardless of how we felt about each other.

"We told our friends about us," Draco prompted, trying to lighten the mood. "They were thrilled, weren't they?"

He ran his cold fingertips up and down the exposed skin of my arm, leaving it feeling like it was tingling with each touch. It was a strangely sensual feeling; the intimacy of the comforting feeling was one I wasn't used to from him. I smiled small, but found not much solace in it.

"I suppose, but that's different. They didn't force us into this. It just happened."

"Try not to let it trouble you, darling. I can't bear to see you upset about anything."

He repositioned his arms so that they wrapped more securely around my waist before he pressed a kiss to my temple.

I breathed out, trying to settle my nerves. His touch was calming, at least.

"You're sure you want to tell them?" I asked, hoping he would say no but I knew better.

"I can't keep something like this from my mother."

"You can't?" I looked at him, raising a brow.

"How could I hide it that the girl I've wanted for ye—," he cut himself off before sighing. "Actually, if you really don't want to tell them, we don't have to. It's up to you..."

"I'm not sure. It's just such a toss-up... they can't get their hopes up."

"Hopes up about what?" he inquired, his voice suddenly laced with concern.

"That their agreement is some roaring success. I mean, you and I have only just started... whatever this is between us."

"A relationship, isn't it?" he asked.

His eyebrows were tugged together, causing his forehead to wrinkle. He often looked confused, but not like this. It felt like he was clinging onto every word, grasping onto the last syllable that I would let out and have his mind compute and process it a hundred times over. I couldn't pinpoint what he was doing, but some wheels in his mind were definitely turning.

"Is it? We haven't confirmed anything."

"We... we're married, y/n. Do we need confirmation?" he choked out, almost like he was holding in a breath. His lips were parted, sort of like a dog staring.

"Not legally, I suppose. But just between the two of us, it might be nice to talk about it at some point."

"Oh," he sighed, "I don't know what you need confirmation for. Don't you know how I— it's fine. I just figured we didn't need that."

"You don't think we should discuss it?"

I was a little disappointed at that, but it would explain why we didn't have that conversation just yet. It would make sense that if he thought it wasn't necessary that we wouldn't talk about it.

"What's to discuss? You're mine."

I playfully rolled my eyes. "You know what I mean, Draco."

He didn't look like he did. While I had tried to chuckle and lighten the mood, he seemed less entertained, like that "you're mine" comment was dead serious. His eyes were narrowed and focused like they always were when he was in thought.

"I don't."

I furrowed my eyebrows, confused at his sudden monosyllabic responses. Why was he so distraught all of a sudden?

"We can talk about it some other time," I shook my head. "I'm not asking for that here on the train."

"Right," he slumped in his seat a bit, his arms loosening from around me. "I'm going to try to sleep. Wake me up when we get there, y/n."

He removed his arms completely, shuffling into the corner of the seat and resting his head against the top of the seat and the train. It didn't look comfortable at all. I was going to offer that he could lay his head on my shoulder or lap if he wanted to, but by the looks of it, he was isolating into himself. When he got like this, I couldn't try to help; he wouldn't want it.

———

"Y/n, darling, it's so good to have you home!" My mother engulfed me in a giant hug, followed by my father's much more simple and short one.

"I trust your finals went well?" my father asked, causing me to roll my eyes.

"Yes, papa," I assured him. "I'm just glad that I'm home for the Christmas now."

"And you, Draco?" my mother asked, pulling him into a hug as well after he shook my father's hand. "You've always been such a smart boy, I expect nothing but Outstandings from you," she smiled.

"I'm not one to boast," Draco did his best to feign modesty, almost making me laugh. "But yes, indeed I did."

"There's nothing wrong with boasting, Draco. You're an excellent young man and have deserved your success; and my daughter would do well to recognize that sooner or later," his eyes narrowed on me, obviously making a dig at how I haven't liked him thus far, at least as far as they're aware.

"Y/f/n!" my mother interrupted. "I'm sure the kids are getting used to each other more each day. Isn't that right, y/n?"

I opened my mouth to speak, but Draco beat me to it.

"You're absolutely correct. In fact, the two of us have gotten along better than you might expect."

I glared at him through the corner of my eye, not wanting him to give much away just yet. If anything, our talk on the train just made me more confused. We acknowledged a problem, a potential issue that needed to be resolved sooner or later but we simply postponed it. At some point, we'd be forced to address it and I feared we were waiting too long.

"That's simply lovely," my mother offered. "Nothing makes me happier than to hear you're getting along."

My poor mother; I almost felt bad for keeping the real nature of our relationship from her. Then again, she's the reason I'm even in this situation. I decided that she didn't deserve to know until I was ready. She hadn't earned it.

"My daughter hasn't been giving you too many headaches?" my father asked, causing me to roll my eyes.

"Papa!" I tried to shut him up.

Draco, on the other hand, looked amused as ever. He had on that smirk he wore so well like nothing could knock down his confidence.

"No, Signor Vitelli. None that I can't handle, anyway."

My father gave him a satisfied grin. almost matching the level of Draco's smugness. "An opportunistic gentleman, I see. I've clearly chosen a good match for my daughter."

My mother rolled her eyes, noticing the red flush that was tinting my cheeks. I couldn't hide my embarrassment at their masculine encounter right in front of us.

"I think that's quite enough from you two," my mother interrupted, turning her attention back to Draco and I. "Your room's all fixed for the both of you. Draco, dear, your parents will be joining us this evening for preparations."

"How nice," he tried his best to plaster on a smile, but I knew he didn't care. His mother, perhaps, but I knew he didn't care if he saw his father.

"I'm sure you must be exhausted from the train ride over. Feel free to reconvene with us over dinner," she continued.

My father chimed in, "Unfortunately I'm finishing up some Ministry business at the present moment. I'll be happy to speak with you, Draco, and your father this evening."

By that point, I must've been so red in the face that a doctor could've been called for me. I did my best and eventually succeeded in pulling Draco away from them, although it appeared that his ego was taking a favorable boost in speaking with my father.

"He seems pleased to see me," he smugly noted as we entered our shared room.

I'd finally grown accustomed to it during our last trip here, but I certainly missed my own room. Maybe now that we were more romantically inclined, it would start to feel more like home and I wouldn't feel the need to slip back into my own room at night.

"And you seem pleased to hear what he has to say," I scoffed, flopping on the bed.

"A man is entitled to his due, isn't he?" he smirked, laying down next to me.

"I don't think you're 'due' such flattery just yet."

"Haven't I? I've won the heart of his daughter after all." He moved closer to me, his mouth mere inches from mine. His hot breath against my lips made me tremble under him as he used one hand to prop himself up above me and one hand trailed its way down my waist to rest on my hip. "It wasn't an easy task."

I opened my mouth to shoot back a witty remark, but he instead took the opportunity to press his lips against mine, effectively shutting me up. He moved slowly but with passion, like he was trying to savor every taste of me. It wasn't sloppy or messy, but calculated and precise. This restraint of his wasn't necessary; he could have me whenever he wanted. I think he knew that, though, and it was all the more reason to assert his dominance like this. He did it simply because he could.

He always seemed to kiss me like this when we were alone. It was all consuming; like he owned every bit of me... and he did. His lips against mine was nothing if not euphoric. They were soft and inviting, unlike the rest of him which was cold and reserved for himself. His lips were the only part of him that always seemed to actively invite me to try more, urging and begging to be felt and comforted.

His hands always chose different parts of me to claim whenever he had me like this. Usually they'd find their way around my waist as he'd roam up and down, but during the kiss he decided to change where they'd settle. One was around the back of my neck, gently forcing me up to his mouth and keeping me in place. He could make sure my full attention and future actions were on him that way. His other hand decided to dig into my hip, lightly pushing me up to press against his cold torso.

When he finally pulled back, he rested his forehead against mine and looked into my eyes. It was the most sensual part about him. His eyes were one of his more striking features, but to see them so close and filled with passion was something I loved knowing only I got to experience. It was reserved for only me, regardless of whether our affections for each other grow and develop, or it doesn't work out between us. Nobody else got to have those eyes; they were for me.

He pressed another soft kiss to my lips before smirking.

I felt the vibrations of his chuckle against me and I raised a brow, wondering why.

"What was that for?" I breathed out, still heaving in pockets of air to recover from our kissing. I wanted to know what his chuckle was meant for, but I had a hard time asking.

"Just thinking."

His voice was deep and husky, with a certain rasp to it that made me thankful we were lying down or otherwise my knees would've buckled. I couldn't handle all of him... his messy hair, swollen and reddened lips, deep voice.

"About what?" I managed, brushing a few straggling strands of platinum out of his face.

His eyes scanned me. They looked me up and down before settling into my gaze again and smirking. Not like he had all day, but with a certain innocence to it. It wasn't self smug like he'd been offering before, rather it was giving hints of wonder or disbelief, like he couldn't believe what he was thinking.

"How long it took to get you here."

My breath hitched at his words, suddenly feeling self conscious at his carnal state. I already was blushing due to his kisses, but his words heightened everything. I always seemed to fall more for his verbal affirmations than anything else, it held more clarity to it.

His eyes seemed to darken for a moment, narrowing unlike the widened expression they held a moment ago. He let out a throaty hum that made my stomach tighten with a sensual churning.

"And how fucking amazing it feels to finally have you."

Chapter Text

The next week or so was kind of a blur.

The Malfoy's came over to stay with my family and I the night that we returned. There was something odd about us all together. Even though I was used to it, them staying was something different. There was no reason that they couldn't floo home at night or just pop in when necessary, but they chose instead to stay. I suppose that meant they respected my family (of course they did, otherwise they wouldn't marry off their son to my family), but it was still a strange feeling having someone as daunting as Lucius Malfoy at my breakfast table.

It meant that there were restrictions on things, more so than usual.

I had to be extra prim and proper. Not that I usually wasn't, but I had to make a good showing in front of my in-laws, which meant more elegant clothing all the time that was still modest and no interacting with house elves. I felt bad many times when younger house elves would come hug me or tell me some of the latest house-elf chatter in the community and I'd be looking over my shoulder to make sure my parents or the Malfoy's weren't lurking around.

It wasn't that I was ashamed; they were some of my best friends and caretakers. It just unfortunately was not something I could admit to with my parents around... or even Draco.

As much as I'd come to like and care for Draco, many of his aristocratic tendencies became heightened when we lived together. At Hogwarts, we'd only see each other during specific parts of the day and at night go our separate ways, even if I didn't necessarily want to. Seeing him at all hours of the day was comforting, but it accentuated his negative characteristics.

I was sick of hearing him scoff under his breath when I spoke to a house elf longer than a minute or when I took the time to clean off my own espresso cup in the kitchen rather than calling for it to be taken away. Little things like that made me somewhat annoyed with him, but I could deal with it.

Living with him had many more positives than negatives.

We'd spent a few days in the same bed before, but this was much different. It was so much nicer to have someone you genuinely cared for and adored to sleep next to.

The night would typically start with us reading to each other, one lying in the other's arms and the other whispering whatever words were on the page in dim lighting just bright enough to read off the page. There was plenty of caressing and light kisses, anything to evoke an emotional and affectionate reaction.

There were more than their fair share of hungrier, more passionate kisses too. Depending on the time of day (or night), we'd pull each other aside or into one of the many rooms in my family manor and have our fill of each other. I'd usually end up doing a beauty charm afterward, just to make sure my makeup wasn't smeared or my hair wasn't messy.

Even if we were married, our parents were still around and I had no doubt they wouldn't approve of us sneaking off to make out then walking out together for dinner.

Affection wasn't typically something pureblood couples flaunted.

Most were loveless marriages anyway, so the fact that we even desired each other at all was an anomaly. It wasn't proper and could even be considered uncouth to do anything more than perhaps hold hands in a public setting, or even with other family members present.

Draco and I were no strangers to pureblood culture, but it became harder to conceal our affection for each other when we were so tempted to touch or kiss one another at almost any given point in the day.

How could we not? It was extra difficult when considering all we did for those days was be in each other's presence. Sometimes our parents were around, mostly at mealtimes, but more often than not it was just us wandering around rooms.

It mostly consisted of games. Chess, checkers, senet, whatever we could find. We even learned a few games to pass time in some old book I found in our library. Learning them was a pain, but well worth it in the end.

There was lots of reading. By ourselves, to each other, reading our own book in each other's company.

It was usually the same routine.

"What have you got there?" Draco asked, coming up behind me and wrapping his arms around my waist.

"Emma," I quickly closed the book with a thump and displayed the cover to him. His eyes glanced over it, but opted to place his chin on my shoulder for a better embrace.

"Another one of your muggle books?" he asked, lightly swaying to the side and back, causing me to do the same.

I lowly chuckled. "You wouldn't like it. It's a romance."

"Why read about love when you could be experiencing it right here?"

My cheeks blushed red, causing him to laugh. He nuzzled his nose into the crook of my neck and lightly peppered kisses to the skin. It was innocent, a mere flirty line, but still made me nervous around him. I hated how good he was at making me feel dizzy with affection.

"Come on, Draco," I giggled, "you might think it's a good one."

He snorted sarcastically. "Yeah. 'Cause the way I dream of spending my afternoon is reading muggle chick lit when I could be in the arms of my gorgeous wife."

That was something he started to say a lot more frequently.

He used the word "wife" much more during this trip, I noticed. Not only in the library or to ourselves, but often in conversation with our parents he'd reference something of our marriage.

"I'll be a proper husband once we've graduated from Hogwarts," he'd announce, or "y/n's the best choice for wife at that school". They were usually when speaking to our parents and weren't overly sweet or even compliments, but they indicated that we weren't upset with the arrangement as much as we once were.

We made sure to keep the idea away from our parents that we liked each other. If we were together and felt like one was entering the room, I'd shake Draco off or move away from him a sizable distance that made us look inconspicuous. He always shook his head or rolled his eyes when I did that, which could only mean he wanted to tell them. I was glad he respected my wishes in keeping it private, though.

One instance in particular, though, was less than desirable.

Draco and I were laying on the loveseat in one corner of the library together. It was tucked away and fairly private, something I intentionally chose just for us to be together without interruptions. That was my hope, anyway.

His back was pressed up against the headboard of the seat and I sat between his legs, my back against his chest. He had his arms around me as I read to him. He changed up his routine of either resting his head on my shoulder, pressing kisses in places that made me squirm, and even just closing the book for a moment so he could capture my lips with his.

During one of those blurred moments, I was too engrossed in him to realize that we had company.

Luckily it was just a house elf that I swore to secrecy, but once I heard the little voice of the house elf I practically jumped off Draco. All we were doing was kissing, honestly rather innocently, but I wanted the least chance of our parents finding out as possible.

I hopped off the seat and upright, trying to fix my clothes and hair to no avail. I thanked God it wasn't my mother, or worse, either of our fathers, but I hadn't been scared half to death in so long.

When I sat back down, Draco looked annoyed. He had a grimace playing on his lips, almost sneering with the way the top lip tugged up. His brows were furrowed together and he slumped in his seat. It was obvious that he wasn't happy.

"Must you always jump at the sound of another being?" he rolled his eyes, suddenly turned off from our activity a moment ago.

I couldn't blame him.

"Just got worried someone would see us, Draco," I assured him while adjusting a few strands of hair that were disheveled. I was still doing my best to primp myself into looking more put together. "I'm fine now."

"Stop that."

His voice came out as a command as he yanked my arm, causing me to forcefully and unexpectedly crash up against his body. Before I could process what was going on, his arms were already securely around me and in a much closer hold than we were while reading.

"You look better like this," he told me convincingly. "Stay here."

That whole rest of the afternoon he was on edge, always having to be touching me. I wasn't complaining, but at the same time my nerves were heightened after the house elf incident.

I told myself it was cute that he always wanted me near.

---

"The decorations should be coming in tomorrow," my mother announced at the dinner table. "Y/n dear, you'll love what Narcissa and I picked for this year's theme."

"It's Christmas," I almost snorted, "isn't the theme red and green?"

Narcissa laughed, but my mother looked unamused.

"We decided to try a holiday theme this year. Something different from just red and green."

"Every year I always host a themed Christmas party, y/n, so we decided to make a combination of the two. I'm sure you'll love it, it'll be a change of pace for you," Narcissa smiled.

That made sense, I suppose. Still, it was odd of my mother to steer clear of any traditions. As long as it was in line with someone else's of course it would be acceptable for her.

"I've heard from a certain Horace Slughorn that he'll be in attendance this year," Lucius spoke up. "Haven't heard from that man in a while."

"He was friends with my father," my mother explained. "He's always welcome to our events. You sound displeased with him?"

Lucius shrugged, looking unimpressed. "I was once associates with him but we... how shall I say it? Fell through."

"Would you like us to remove him from the list?" my father asked, always willing to indulge Lucius.

Narcissa interrupted. "That won't be necessary. I'm sure he'll make a fine addition."

Lucius looked like he wanted to object, but he couldn't make the list for someone else. Even if it was a joint party, it wasn't his role as the host of the house.

Part of me internally panicked, before I realized Slughorn probably already knew about Draco and I. We hadn't told the entire school, but we made it clear to our friends about our feelings for each other and Draco started occasionally holding my hand during class or some small sign that we were together.

Slughorn, being someone who always seemed to know the latest gossip or information around the school despite being a professor, must have known. I doubt something like that would be allowed to slip.

"Speaking of fine addition," my mother smiled, "Draco, I'm sure you're looking forward to being presented to the guests as part of this family?"

I almost spit out my drink at that.

"Mama... wasn't he already?" I choked out. "At the ball a couple months ago?"

She shook her head and giggled a bit. "That was just a family event, honey. This will be broader than that. I'd expect a few journalists from the paper to show up and document as well. A couple always do."

While I was on the verge of panicking even further at this, Draco on my left looked cool as a cucumber. In fact, he looked almost too okay with it. He had a grin on his face, not snarky or malicious, but just a smile.

"Yes, of course, y/m/n. It's an honor to be part of this family and I'm happy to be introduced at such an event. Christmas Eve, no less... it's a perfect time to be formally presented to the public."

I shot him a look, one that basically read "are you serious?". Again, he looked unaffected. Like he was being serious when he said that.

Our mothers looked so happy, with big smiles donning their lips. I don't think I'd seen them so happy in so long.

"Oh, Draco!" Narcissa interjected, "That's so wonderful to hear!"

"I'm sure my son knows what a respectable lineage he's married into," Lucius boasted, looking prideful. "Finally the boy learns just how lucky he is."

I blushed red, not wanting to be there all of a sudden. I desperately tried to dissociate and not be aware of what was going on, but I knew it was impossible.

"I'm wondering when my daughter will come around," my father peered over at me. "At least one of the kids has their head on straight."

I sneaked another look at Draco, who had the same prideful look on his face as Lucius. He really was the spitting image of his father: the platinum hair, gray eyes, sharp contours. Looking from one to the other sort of gave me whiplash; it was like looking in a mirror to see his future.

It wasn't necessarily a bad thing, but it did cast a shadow of a doubt on how much Draco claimed to dislike his father when he seemed to take after him entirely. As much as Draco retained some of Narcissa's sensitivities, he was his father's son at the end of the day. Knowing him for so long and truly getting to know his personality revealed that he was a Malfoy more than he'd like to admit.

Realizing that at the dinner table was not ideal, especially talking about such a topic. However, it was the only thing I could process as they rambled on about everything: the party, how well Draco is integrating himself in the family, how proud his parents are. I think I even heard a wisp of something about moving in together after graduation. Lucius and my father found us a manor in the countryside long ago... I wanted to avoid talking about it with them.

I tried to find solace in looking at Draco like I had many times before, but I found none.

For the first time, he looked and sounded like everyone else at that table.

Chapter Text

When I walked into the room, Draco was sat at the piano and visibly frustrated for whatever reason.

"What's the matter?" I asked, sliding in next to him at the piano bench.

He sighed loudly, bringing his elbows to slam against the keys making an unpleasant sound. He buried his face into his hands.

"Hey, what'd this piano do to deserve the abuse?" I tried to joke.

Whatever was going on, he clearly didn't find the joke funny.

I looked around the large music room that my family had and it looked as elegant as ever, save for the piano. All the other instruments were clean and polished, no doubt the labors of the tireless house elves. My parents didn't even play music, but they insisted on keeping the dozens of fancy instruments in here for the cultural aspect.

The only thing that was out of place was the large, black grand piano. It had fingerprints all over the outsides, heightened by the dark color which accentuated any prints. There were music sheets scattered about, some on the stand and some had fallen to the floor or Draco had lazily thrown them to another side. It was the only part of the room with any life to it, ironically.

I brought my hand up to the back of his neck and rubbed it soothingly. He seemed to relax into my touch a little bit.

"I haven't seen you all morning," he lamely stated, turning his head to look at me.

I gave him a blank expression. I supposed that was true... what did it matter?

"I had some things to attend to," I replied, still running my hand over his back and lightly massaging his neck.

"Things?" he echoed.

"My mother needed help with the party. I was upset with the last ball; I didn't get to do anything so I made sure I had a place this time."

He sighed out, visibly relaxing. "Oh, good."

"Where did you think I went?" I prompted.

He shrugged. "I wasn't thinking. It was the first time since we got here that I woke up and you weren't there..."

It was as if my heart literally was tugged on. I instantly flooded with regret; I should've stayed there until he woke up. I didn't think he would have taken it negatively, but apparently he did and I should have been aware of that.

I pulled him in for a hug and he tightly wrapped his arm around my waist. I made sure to pepper kisses to his cheek the way that I know he likes, which seemed to succeed a bit in making him smile.

"I'm sorry, Draco. I didn't think it would be a problem but I should've said something to you last night."

"It wasn't a problem," he shook his head. "I just didn't like it. It didn't... feel right without you there."

Again, my heart was nearly fluttering at that point. I felt like a silly schoolgirl with the hold that this boy had on my emotions. In a way, I was just a silly schoolgirl; I couldn't act like it though.

Instead of assuring him through words, I pressed a kiss to his lips which he eagerly accepted. A moment or so later when he pulled back he looked a hundred times better.

"What are you working on here?" I skeptically eyed the piano which looked like a mess.

He huffed again, making me assume that he was frustrated for a number of reasons other than just my leaving this morning.

"I'm having a bit of difficulty, you could say."

"And the piano comes in, where?"

"Usually playing just helps me think. It focuses me but I find myself worse off now than when I started."

"Why don't you play me something? Might clear your mind if you're playing for someone else."

He shook his head immediately, eyes narrowing and looking uninterested.

"I don't play for audiences."

I rolled my eyes jokingly, trying to egg him on. "Really, Draco? This is my piano you know. I could kick you off at any given moment."

He smirked, looking like he was catching my attitude quickly. "And you are my wife, you know. That means I have every legal right to this piano as the heir to your family's manor, too."

"And I could divorce you at any given moment, you know."

He laughed at that, finally looking like himself again. I was happy he did that; the joke I made could've been taken the wrong way and soured quickly if he didn't have a sense of humor.

"Point taken. I suppose I could play a little tune," he smiled, placing his fingers on the keys.

His hands were one of my favorite things about him. They were so elegant and soft to the touch. Apart from a scar on his wrist left over from the quidditch incident a few weeks ago, they were always one of the most revealing parts about him. They showed off how refined he was, so untouched and protected from his family status and I knew they were a source of pride for him.

His fingers were long and lean, perfect for playing piano. I figured he was a piano man just based on how he presented himself, but he certainly had the natural assets for it too. With a stretch of his hand, he could reach a large number of keys at once.

He started off slow, almost like he was hesitating or wary to some degree. I figured it was nerves; he said he didn't play for people so this must've been new to him, more or less. Still, after a few moments, he seemed to find his rhythm.

It wasn't a piece that I'd heard before, and I'd been exposed to a lot of music growing up in a pureblood family that emphasized culture and intelligence. It wasn't Beethoven, Mozart, Bach... a list of names of famous composers flooded my mind and the results came up blank. I couldn't figure where it was from.

It didn't sound familiar, either. Maybe I was just uninformed on wizarding musicians and I assumed that it was written by one of them. It was no secret that the Malfoy family was much more inclined to associate with other wizarding families only, while mine was willing to branch out for the sake of arts or music. The line stopped there.

The piece sounded somber. Not depressing, necessarily, but the minor key in which it was played had an undertone of gloominess to it. It suited Draco, funnily enough, but it almost sounded like it was trying to convey some sort of message that I couldn't figure. He wasn't reading off sheet music, his eyes were just on the keys. He must have this one memorized.

"That was impressive, Draco," I smiled once the song came to an end.

A hint of pink tinted his light cheeks. He turned to look at me with a half-grin on his lips, looking almost shy. It must have been a vulnerable moment for him, which I recognized must not have been easy.

"I'm glad you found it appealing," he drawled out, eyes lingering on mine.

"That song," I sighed, "what was it? I've never heard it before."

"You're not familiar with music, are you?"

"I know a thing or two. I'm not familiar with that, though."

He raised his eyebrows, almost out of surprise. He cleared his throat before refocusing on me. "Oh, I didn't know you— never mind. It's just something I taught myself."

"What's it about? Its mood was... something I couldn't identify."

He scoffed, smirking slightly. "You ask a lot of questions, y/n."

"Is that so? I can leave you be if that's what you want—"

"No way," he cut me off, reaching for my hand. He caressed the back of it soothingly for a moment. "I haven't seen you all morning and I'm not letting you out of my sight now."

"Then get on with it," I chuckled. "Tell me about that piece."

He sighed loudly, a puff of air lifting up a few strands of hair that rested on his forehead. Clearly he wasn't interested in letting up about whatever the song was.

"It's about... longing."

I wanted to ask longing for what, but he seemed very turned off from answering questions. Truth be told, I was surprised he even gave me that much information after the way he'd acted.

"Longing?" I echoed, eyebrows furrowed.

"Yeah," he nodded. "A type of desire that... you'd do anything for."

"I don't suppose you're going to tell me what kind of desire that it's referring to."

"Your perceptiveness is one of the things I like best about you," he chuckled. Clearly, he wasn't going to be telling me more than that.

I huffed, looking annoyed. That caused him only to smirk further, looking entertained with himself.

"Come on, love," he cooed, "don't be upset with me, it's just not something I want to talk about. I'll let you read me one of your chick lits if it makes you feel better."

I dryly laughed at that stupid attempt to make me happier. Still, I wasn't happy that it was at the expense of learning about his song. I just wanted to know more about things that he likes; I never really get to see more intimate parts of his life. As per usual, I was left with less than I wanted.

"I think we should get out of here," I looked at him.

His smirk turned more mischievous before leaning down, trying to capture my lips with his. "I couldn't agree more."

I quickly turned my head away, causing him to pout jokingly. "I mean we're having decorators come take over this room soon. We shouldn't be in here while they're working."

He rolled his eyes, instead intertwining our fingers as a replacement for my refusing his kiss.

"You're no fun," he pouted.

———

Draco and I found that most of the main rooms were being taken over for decorations. I figured that'd be the case, since that's typically how it went. The drawing room, main dining hall, ballroom; the usual suspects.

As such, we weren't left with many options for entertainment. There were dozens of rooms left to pick from, but I wasn't going to show him one by one each bedroom on the sleeping floor.

I decided that he'd probably most enjoy the art room, which was really just a collection of family portraits that hailed on for generations. I couldn't tell you how many relatives there were paintings of in there, the number was too high to count.

There were a mixture of many other art pieces there too, though. Plenty of sculptures, paintings, a few mosaics although I wasn't particularly fond of them. It was a classy room, but I'm sure it was a pain to be cleaned and nobody hardly stepped foot in there except for maybe once a year for a social matter.

"I'm surprised you haven't brought me here yet," Draco gawked around, eyes scanning from portrait to portrait.

"You like?"

"It's certainly a rich family history."

"Don't you have one of these in your home?" I asked, pulling him by the hand.

He intertwined our fingers as I slowly led him around the room. He followed behind me the slightest bit, sometimes reaching for my waist and slowing us down a bit more so he could inspect around.

"We don't really have a room for it, but yes. We mostly have paintings just in the library or down the halls. Some of them are talking portraits too," he shivered.

I chuckled. "Your family really invested in live portraits?"

"It's my least favorite part of magic. Gives me the creeps," a chill ran down his spine.

"I'd imagine it isn't fun having your grandfather's portrait stare you down in the halls," I laughed, trying to poke fun at his uncomfortable state. He shot me a joking glare.

"Definitely not. But that's not the worst part... I doubt they'd approve of us being so touchy feely." He reached for my wrist and turned me around, pulling me to his chest. A smirk graced his lips as he leaned down close to my ear. "Their gossip spreads like wildfire."

No matter how many times he held me in his arms, I couldn't help the shiver of my skin under his touch. It was like he set me on fire yet also caused me to tremble with coldness, and I loved the polar climate.

Ever so gently, he pressed his lips against mine and continued their familiar caressing that I'd grown to love. It was a comforting feeling that sent my insides fluttering with excitement. Draco was a mysterious guy, and it felt like I'd finally cracked his code to some degree. It took too long to get to the point where we were, but it was worth it when I felt the passion of his kiss.

I wrapped my arms around his neck, lightly urging him on to continue. I felt him smirk against me before his tongue swiped against my lower lip, prompting access. The wetness of his mouth filled mine in its intimate display of affection that I'd grown accustomed to.

He had a way of making everything so passionate, but hardly ever wild. I didn't know that a person's kiss could convey so much desire while still maintaining gentleness and composure, like a perfectly choreographed number that never suffered a hitch. I didn't want to think where he learned this or I'd grow jealous immediately; I tried to refocus my attention on the fact that he was here and with me.

He deepened the kiss by bringing one hand around the back of my neck, urging me further into him while the other steadied around my waist. I did the same, having one hand around the back of his head and the other around his shoulders. We were wordlessly explaining our need for each other through a kinetic sense of communication.

I felt the vibrations of his chuckle against my mouth, a telltale sign that he was happy, before we both were jerked away from each other at the sound of female gasps.

"Oh, Merlin!" our mothers spat out, almost in unison.

Our mouths were pulled away from each other, but Draco repositioned his hands so that they stayed around my waist. I dropped my arms from his shoulders and tried to squirm out of his grasp, but he only tightened his hold around me, like he was afraid I'd get away.

"Mama..." I stammered, "I am so sorry... this wasn't meant to happen like this—"

"Y/n, don't apologize!" my mother seemed to beam, leaving me with a confused expression on my face. "Finally, it's happened!"

"Mama, what are you talking about?" I uncomfortably spat out, still trying to shake my way out of Draco's relentless grasp to no avail.

Narcissa's smile matched the one my mom wore. It was like the two of them couldn't be any happier. Come to think of it, I don't know if I'd ever seen my mother so happy. Not since I was a child, at least.

"You've finally fallen for Draco!" Narcissa interjected, grinning ear to ear. "Merlin, it has been a long time, hasn't it?"

"Mom!" Draco finally spoke up, his cheeks flushing red almost immediately. "Now is not the time—"

"Oh, hush, son. I'm just happy your years of hard work have finally paid off."

"Mother..." his tone turned more serious, causing me to look between the two Malfoys.

I successfully shook myself out of his grasp now that he was temporarily distracted, giving myself some autonomy once again.

"Sorry, Narcissa, did you just say 'years'?" I asked, clearly looking upset.

"Why, yes dear. Hasn't my Draco told you? Or have you two not gotten to that conversation quite yet?"

"What conversation?" I echoed. "Draco, what's she talking about?"

"That he's been in love with you for years, of course," Narcissa smiled. "It's so wonderful to see you feel the same finally."

My jaw dropped.

What was she talking about? Draco isn't in love with me! Until this summer when we were married, he hardly even spoke to me, except in the form of insults or digs. Even after we were married, for some weeks he continued to harass me and make my life miserable!

Only after I forced myself to give him a chance for the sake of not wanting to be miserable did our relationship improve. I couldn't figure what on earth Narcissa was talking about.

"I don't— we're not—" I stammered, "Draco and I are not in love."

Our mothers gave me a curious look.

"Are we mistaken?" my mother asked.

"I'm afraid you must be. Draco and I only just started being interested in each other recently."

"Y/n," Draco interrupted, "maybe we ought to step aside and talk this through..."

Narcissa laughed. "Is that what you think, honey? My, how mistaken are you. Draco's only wanted to marry you since he was a boy—"

"Mother, quiet!" Draco interrupted finally, now out of his state of shock. "I haven't quite told y/n the details."

Narcissa's eyes flashed with disappointment. "Draco! How have you not told her? You clearly have gotten what you wanted and you aren't even honest with the poor girl?"

"Draco, what are they talking about?" I forced my attention to him.

He looked the most distraught I'd ever seen him. His brows were furrowed, beads of nervous sweat drenching his forehead as his cheeks were flushed pink.

At some point he must've gone to run a hand through his hair, as it was no longer the styled and managed platinum locks that I knew, they were messy and unkept, dampened with perspiration.

"Go on, Draco," Narcissa urged her son. "Now is as good a time as any to tell her how you feel."

He gave one last irritated look at his mother before turning to me. My arms were crossed and my expression impatient. If he knew what was good for him, he'd pull me aside to explain before things got worse.

"I think you and I need to have a talk."

Chapter Text

I'd been upset with Draco before. I'd been annoyed with Draco before. I'd been pissed off with Draco before. I'd wanted to punch the daylights out of Draco before.

Not once had I been as overwhelmingly furious with Draco as I was in the art room.

And not once had I ever had such self restraint to not rip him to pieces while he stood in front of me. Dressed in his usual black suit attire, I fought the urge to claw at him until he spilled whatever he needed to say.

He had urged our mothers out of the room finally for some privacy between the two of us. Part of me was glad that they were gone and the peanut gallery couldn't give any input, but another part of me wanted them there. Maybe they could hold me off if I eventually did decide to kill him.

I was sat at the loveseat against the wall, waiting for Draco to come up with some answers.

I sat with my legs and arms crossed, clearly upset and closed off from him. The pale blonde in front of me paced up and down, as if he was formulating a response. He looked distressed, but given how annoyed and ready for a discussion I was, he should have been a hundred times more worried than he was.

"Well?" I finally spoke up. The boy almost jumped back at the harshness of my voice, but just halted in his tracks and looked at me.

He straightened his black tie, loosening it like it was restricting his ventilation. With how red his neck and face were, you might think that it was.

He cleared his throat.

"I, uh... don't know how to tell you what I'm meant to tell you, y/n."

I rolled my eyes. "You have to do better than that."

"Merlin, give me a minute," he stammered. I could practically see the sweat dripping off his features.

"From the sound of it, you've had much longer than a minute."

His eyes widened eerily bright, like he was scared. Considering how anxious I sat there, I was glad he was scared of the situation. He deserved whatever he was feeling.

"What my mother said wasn't exactly correct," he breathed out.

"Then explain yourself."

"Y/n, it's not that simple—"

"Malfoy, I am giving you one chance to explain yourself and I suggest you do so wisely."

His adam's apple bobbed up and down in what I figured was nervousness as he gulped furiously. Part of me wanted to feel bad for him; he looked terrified. The rest and more domineering part of me was glad that he was suffering.

"I understand," he nodded breathlessly. "Where would you... like me to start?"

I feigned pondering for a moment. "Let's start with where your mother seemed to give a time estimate. Does 'years' ago sound familiar to you?"

"She... wasn't completely correct in speaking. She made it sound much worse than it was, I can promise you that."

"But she wasn't completely incorrect," I clarified. His breath hitched, confirming my suspicions. "Now, what did she mean by you've finally gotten what you want?"

"Y/n, maybe we should slow—"

"I'd appreciate it if you referred to me by 'Vitelli' for now."

His eyes seemed to soften, like a wave of emotion hit him. "But... that hasn't been your name for months now. You signed the papers for a name change."

"I know."

He gulped again, realizing what I was implying. I didn't want to be linked to him right now.

"If that's what you wish... Vitelli," he sighed. "My mother exaggerates a lot, you know she does."

"But she's no liar."

"That, she isn't. Y/n— sorry, Vitelli... when she said that I... I don't know what she was saying. It must have just slipped out—"

"Cut the bullshit, Draco. I gave you a chance to explain, and you're walking on thin ice with these responses."

"Please understand, love, that all I've ever wanted is you."

"That unfortunately is not the answer to my question."

"In a way... it is."

I cocked my head to the side, silently prompting him to continue on. "What's that supposed to mean?"

He looked down at his feet before looking back up at me, nervousness flooding his eyes.

"This is something I've wanted to tell you for a while now, but especially since we got here. I've dropped little hints referencing to it but I don't know if you've picked up on it."

"Evidently not. Now, get to talking."

Draco sighed heavily before his eyes softened.

"Would you believe me if I told you that I've been in love with you since the day I saw you?"

I almost stumbled back at that question. My features twisted together in an uncomfortable way, displaying my distress and clear confusion.

"What are you talking about?"

He scoffed, not out of annoyance but more like frustration, as if he was mentally deliberating something.

"Can you think back all the way to when we were children? It was my eighth birthday when we met. I had a party with the children of some other pureblood families, it was all set up by my parents so I could make friends of my own caliber."

I reflected back for a second. "Yes, I remember that. What's that got to do with anything?"

"You're not going to believe me if I say this," he sighed, "but I feel like I've wanted you since then. I know, we were just kids and I couldn't possibly comprehend anything like love, but I do remember not being able to get you out of my head."

"So you had a little crush on me," I clarified. "That's not 'in love' by any means."

"At the time, maybe it was. But over time, it developed into something more intense, you could say."

"More intense?" I repeated.

"When I got older," he affirmed, "and we went to Hogwarts. It seemed like every year the feelings I had for you deepened. It got to a point where you were all I thought about, all hours of the day. I didn't know how to process those feelings since I didn't understand them."

"When we were younger, all you did was harass me relentlessly. Did you think that would win me over?"

"No, of course not. I just didn't have any idea how to let you know how I really felt, so I turned my affection for you into something else. It killed me to treat you like that, but it was the only thing I knew how to do."

"That's really stupid, Malfoy. You don't court a girl by making her feel like shit everyday for seven years straight."

"I'm aware, and I'll regret those decisions everyday for the rest of my life. I already do."

"That's touching, but not an apology," I sarcastically huffed.

"Wait," he sighed. "I'm afraid it gets worse."

"How?"

What could he possibly tell me that was worse than tormenting me my entire youth?

"Well... in fifth year, my father presented the idea of an arranged marriage to me. I knew that I'd have one at some point, there was no way around it. I was being assigned one and that was it. Some of my friends were talking about having the same done for them."

"Fifth year?" I asked. "My parents didn't bring it up to me until this past summer. I had no idea that I was..." I paused. "Wait."

Draco grimaced. His features contorted like they were shrinking up, his nose crinkling and eyebrows scrunching out of disgust. He knew what I had just come to the realization of.

"You didn't."

"Y/n, I can't apologize enough—"

"Don't call me that!" I harshly cut him off, standing up from my seat to emphasize my emotions. "How could you possibly do that to me?"

"Trust me, I didn't have any intention of hurting you—"

"Bullshit! I wasn't meant to be in an arranged marriage but because you wanted me, I was forced to be your wife!"

"It's not that simple!" he finally elevated his aggression levels, matching but not surpassing mine. "I'm telling you, it sounds worse than it is! Give me a chance to expl—"

"How could you have possibly taken my freedom away like that?! I didn't deserve to be thrown into this!"

"Of course you didn't! Merlin, I'm so fucking in love with you, don't you think it kills me to know how unhappy you were on the day of our wedding while I had to hide the fact that the girl I've always wanted was finally mine?"

"See! Even now, you're only thinking about how you felt. How fucking selfish! Poor little Draco had to pretend to be upset while he got what he wanted all along, whereas my independence had been ripped from me!"

Draco opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out. It was as if everything I'd been saying finally sunk in. Funny; all these years of wanting me and he didn't consider this with all that time he had to think.

"You act like my freedom wasn't taken from me too," he finally piped up, in a voice much smaller than it had been a moment ago.

"You picked me to be your wife," I added, "it sure sounds like you had some choice."

"I was going to have one anyway! If it wasn't you, it'd be some other pureblood girl that I don't want!"

"So that makes it okay for me to be forced to marry some boy I don't want?"

His features softened immediately, his lips slightly parting and breath escaping like it was being forced out. I could practically hear his lungs deflate.

"You... don't want me?"

I started to speak, but I forced myself to stop before I said something I'd regret. Was I angry with him? Of course. Was I close to throwing him out of the room and swearing I'd never see him again? Also yes. But could I lie and say that I didn't have feelings for him? I couldn't deny how I felt.

But none of that mattered in the moment.

All I could process was the fact that I'd been forced to marry him, but he wasn't forced to marry me.

"I wouldn't take your choice away from you."

More air escaped Draco's lips. I almost wanted to remind him to breathe, he looked so helpless.

"I never meant to do that to you, love."

His words came out like choppy, unsteady puffs than a sentence. He looked scared to say the wrong thing. He absolutely should have been.

"After everything I've done for you..." he shook his head, "do you really not want me?"

"Everything you've done for me?" I sounded offended, slowly raising my voice. "Tell me, Malfoy, what have you done for me besides break up my relationship, take away my freedom, fuck up my life? No romantic dinners or diamond necklaces can make up for that."

I didn't hear anything from Draco for a moment.

He just looked down, and I knew why. He felt shame. And I wanted him to feel shame. I wanted him to feel even an ounce of what I felt for months after we were married. Still, no matter how ashamed he felt in the moment, I doubted he would ever truly have an understanding of what he broke.

He didn't say anything else. Instead, he let out a few sniffles, short ones that made his chest heave up and down.

I don't think I'd ever seen him cry before.

It wasn't in his nature. He was always the conqueror, the one wreaking havoc that everyone looked up to or focused their attention on.

In a way, he still was. He conquered what he wanted; he took what he desired, wreaked havoc on my life. It was at the expense of my happiness, my freedom, my independence, and he did it anyway. Why? Because he wanted to.

By that point, the tears streaming down his pale face were evident. They dripped off his pointed chin and stained his dark suit, leaving wet marks at the top of the lapels. He didn't care, material objects were of no issue to him, like everything else.

Then, he did something I hadn't expected him to do.

He lowered himself onto his knees.

He inched his way closer to me, reaching for my hands. I wanted to pull back, not giving him the satisfaction of being allowed to touch me, but I decided to entertain whatever he was doing. He'd never been so open about his emotions before, and I was going to take advantage of it. Not the other way around.

His skin was as cold as always, this time wettened by a few tears he'd wiped away with his fingers.

When he looked up at me, tears welling in his big blue eyes, I felt a twinge of temptation to give in, but I couldn't. The feeling left as quick as it came, as I reminded myself of why we were even in this position.

"Please forgive me," he cried into my hand, clutching it close to his face.

He peppered wet kisses to the back of my hand, the palm, any skin he could reach. Draco was never good with words; he was much more of a physical interactor.

"I can't explain how upset I am with myself for doing this to the girl I love," he choked out between fits of tears, "I can't live knowing you hate me."

"I... didn't say I hate you, Malfoy," I finally replied once he gave me the opportunity.

He looked up at me again, cheeks reddened with the flush of color that tinted his light skin.

"I can't live knowing you don't love me either."

As angry as I was with him, that struck a cord with me. No, no... I couldn't feel bad for him. This was his fault, he fucked things up. He could have been civil with me from the beginning, pursued a real relationship, and we still could have ended up married together properly like two loving adults.

But no, I kept reminding myself, he did this for his own selfish reasons.

No matter how desperate he may look on his knees begging for forgiveness, no matter how many tears he shed, no matter how much he may claim he loves me, this was his fault.

"How could I, knowing what I do?" I looked down at him, who clutched my hand tighter and cried harder. He almost made my hand cramp with how forceful his grip was, but I let it slide. I could at least give him that.

"I... I can't expect you to," he spoke. "I've taken so much from you already. I can't force your love."

"I could've loved you, Draco," he perked up at the sound of his first name, but then retreated back into his somber state, "I was even... really starting to like you. This changes everything."

"Does it?" he asked, still on his knees, inching closer so that his face was nearly pressed against me. "You're still my wife, I'm still... your husband."

"I don't care," I told him, trying to back up the slightest bit, which he responded to by just scooting closer to me. "On paper, that might be true, but I need time to process this."

"Time?" his features turned even more depressed, if that was possible. "We'll still be married even if you decide you want nothing to do with me."

"Right now, that looks plausible."

He cried harder into my hand, still peppering kisses to the soft skin that was now used to his freezing touch. His tears were even colder, like little drops of ice sliding down.

"I'll do anything you ask, y/n... for the rest of my life, I'll be making up for what I did."

"That's a long time, Draco," I shifted uncomfortably, looking at him nearly pressed against me.

"I waited years for you... I can wait however long it takes for you to forgive me, if ever."

"Why entertain this? How can we go back to building a relationship that's built on lies?"

He looked up at me once more, his eyes now red and bloodshot from crying.

On his knees in front of me, hair messy and suit stained with tears, I'd never seen him so utterly desperate.

"I'll always pick being miserable with you than to miserable and without you."

Chapter Text

I didn't sleep in our bed that night.

That went without saying, for the most part, but how could I have slept beside him knowing the things I did and feeling the way I felt?

I don't know if he stayed in that room or found one of the other dozens of rooms to pick from. I didn't care, either. The only thing that mattered to me was that I was in my room, sleeping in my bed, and I had my privacy. Draco could do fuck all for all I care.

I made sure to actively avoid him the next day too.

I skipped breakfast, too sick to eat anything. Even so, I would've skipped probably to avoid seeing his face. I scheduled my lunch around the hours at which I knew he liked to eat, and I only made a quick trip down to the library to avoid seeing him.

I wanted to keep myself busy with party planning, but I knew that the problem with that was I couldn't avoid my mother or Narcissa. They'd ask questions, pretend to feel bad for me then urge me, not so subtly, to forgive Draco since they knew as well as I did that I was screwed regardless.

I had never felt as utterly trapped as I did then.

It was like I was a goldfish, looking through the glass bowl. I felt like I had my freedom to swim around, I even got fed every now and then which I felt like was a treat. I was happy for a few seconds at a time and could forget whatever just happened to me, because the little bits of what I had were enough to keep me satisfied.

At the end of the day, I couldn't leave the glass bowl. There would always be someone or something that controlled every bit of what I did.

I tried my honest to God best to make the most of my situation, which made it feel all the more depressing.

I was forced into a marriage, causing me to leave the person I was actually in love with. I fought with myself for months after, convincing myself I was the crazy one for feeling anything for him. I forced myself into giving my husband a chance, because after all, he was just as trapped as I was... only to come to know that he was the reason I was in this mess.

How could I ever find any solace in anything ever again?

That might've been dramatic; it might've been even a bit morbid. But I didn't care. For the first time, it was like nothing I could ever do would ever matter again.

After all, who cares if Draco and I want each other? It's not like we'd ever get a divorce. That would mean I'd be socially outcast from my family. They have no other heirs apart from me and I would feel the pressure and guilt of being ostracized from my family and ending a bloodline.

And so, what do you do when you feel like it's all helpless?

You turn to your friends.

———

I don't know how long I cried into Daphne's arms that afternoon. It could've been minutes since everything seemed to blur together when I was upset like I was. On the other hand, it could've been hours and that was the more likely option.

I cried so much that I felt my bloodshot eyes burn when I blinked, the crusting tear stains on my face felt hard and dirty. My face must've been a red mess too, but Daphne knew better than to tease me at a time like this.

"This might've been a big misunderstanding, y/n," Daphne ran her fingers through my hair soothingly when my cries began to falter a bit. I was laid down on her lap on her bed. I hadn't been to her house in a while, but I missed it. Especially now, it was like a getaway for me.

"How could this be a misunderstanding?" I sniffled. "Everything about this has been a lie."

She sighed, choosing her words carefully. "I don't think Draco ever meant to hurt you."

"It doesn't matter if he 'meant' to do anything. The fact of the matter is that he did."

"Don't you think he cares about you?" she questioned softly. "I've seen the way that boy looks at you, how he acts around you. That's not a fake love."

"Forget love, Daphne. For all I know, for all I care, he could be so madly in love with me that he can't even think about other girls. The problem is, if you care about someone, you don't do something like that to them."

"It sounds like his hand was forced," she shyly stated. I felt bad for making her uncomfortable, but I was also glad she was conscious of my feelings. "You know the Malfoy's would have assigned him someone."

"I'm not saying that makes it okay," I wiped a dry tear from my duct, "I'm saying he had no authority in choosing me as his wife. I wasn't meant to have an arranged marriage."

She stayed silent a moment. She knew I was right; there was no refuting why a boy would pick you as his wife without your consent.

I'd feel bad for him if he was forced into a marriage, which he was, but he cannot right a wrong by doing another wrong thing. Being a victim of one thing does not give one the authority to victimize another person.

"He said it was fifth year, y/n. He was fifteen, really," she continued caressing my head, "I don't think the boy knew any better. He was scared... and selfish, yes. But I don't think he had any malicious intent."

"Malicious or not, it doesn't excuse the consequences of that action."

"I know, y/n, and you need time to heal. You deserve that more than anyone. I'm not saying to forgive Draco right away; you don't have to forgive him at all. But at least try to let yourself be happy in some capacity."

I shuffled off her lap and forced myself to sit up. My back hurt a little.

I was prompted by her mention at letting myself be happy. What was the point in that?

"I don't follow," I huffed. "What does happiness have to do with anything?"

"I love you more than words can explain, y/n, and you deserve to be happy. Not for Draco, not for your parents, but for yourself. I know that until you found this out, you were happy. Maybe a little unhappy with the circumstances, but you were at least becoming happy. I don't give a shit about anyone else in this situation but you, and you owe it to yourself to try to be happy, however that may be."

I opened my mouth to speak, but at that moment I heard the door swing in and I caught the sight of Theo doubled over, face red and trying to catch his breath like he'd just run a marathon. He clutched a tiny piece of parchment in one hand while the other was around his midsection.

"I came... as soon... as I heard..." he heaved out in shaky breaths. I'll admit, that was the first smile I cracked all day.

"It's about time, Nott!" Daphne motioned for him to come over. "I owl'd you half an hour ago!"

He looked like he was about to collapse, but he forced his lanky legs over to the bed and kneeled down on the floor beside me so that I was, sitting on the bed, some distance above him.

He held up the slip of parchment between his fingers as his breathing slowed.

"I got... your message... Daphne," he huffed before gasping for air a final time. "I was just with Draco."

My eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. "You were with him?"

Theo wiped a bead of sweat from his brow. He looked back to normal other than the red of his flushed cheeks.

"He came to my house last night. Told me everything... well, what he wanted me to hear anyway. I didn't know you were here, y/n, I just heard now and rushed over. Literally, rushed. I don't think I've ever apparated so fast before, I almost scorched my eyebrows off."

It was sweet that he dropped Draco in a moment to come comfort me instead. I pushed away whatever upset feelings I had for the greater good.

"Thank you for coming," I spoke softly, looking at his blue eyes. He gave me a crooked smile.

"Always. Draco can suck it, for all I care."

I chuckled at that. There was a piece of me that was aching to know how he was doing, just to gauge his reaction. I couldn't imagine it was good if he left before sunset.

"How... is he?" I asked, causing Theo's eyebrows to bounce up. He likely wasn't expecting that question.

"You don't wanna know," he pushed a few loose strands of hair out of his forehead.

"I do, actually. Just... for peace of mind."

He eyed me skeptically, like he was deciding whether or not I really wanted to know. But maybe to humor me, he sighed then looked at me soulfully.

"He's not good, I'm not going to lie."

The ends of my lips tugged up in a ever so slight, tiny smile. I didn't like hearing he was upset, but I couldn't ignore my carnal instincts of wanting him to feel remorse for what he's put me through. I didn't want revenge, vengeance... he was still Draco at the end of the day. That doesn't mean I couldn't secretly want him to feel the weight of his actions, though.

"Okay, sadist," Theo chuckled, trying to lighten the mood. "Didn't think you'd be so happy."

"I didn't say that I was happy."

"That cheeky grin gave it away, y/n. And honestly? You're entitled to feel that way. I'm not blaming you."

"I don't think any of us do," Daphne chimed in. "Of course you're still angry with him... under normal circumstances, you'd never want him to feel sad."

"Exactly," Theo nodded. "I can't imagine how he would react if the situation were reversed. Probably commit arson or something."

I chuckled again. Whoever said Theo wasn't the best guy friend a girl could have?

"Still, how is he?" I asked. "What's he saying?"

"A whole lot of shit," Theo admitted. "But it comes from a place of love, I can tell you that much."

"How so?" Daphne questioned.

"I was in my living room when he apparated in. He just looked like he was in a rage."

I looked at him quizzically and let him continue on.

"I brought him into my room and he went ballistic. By the time he left, I had to cast, like, seven counterspells to undo the silencing and privacy charms he'd placed on the room."

"He was screaming?"

"Crying," Theo corrected. "I've seen Draco at some pretty bad times, even dark ones. But this... I've never seen him so depressed. It was like... nothing I'd ever seen from him before. I didn't know he could even feel things as deeply as he apparently can."

I scoffed. "You'd have loved to see him cry on his knees for my forgiveness."

Theo's eyebrows tugged together. "Hey, I know you're hurting right now and it's justified, but cut the man some slack. He has lost the girl he loves in the past twenty-four hours, too."

"I didn't say he's lost me," I assured him.

He looked surprised. "Hasn't he? He said he was an emotional wreck and you would barely give him the time of day."

"It wasn't that bad... I was just angry, like you said which is justified."

"It is," he nodded. "But I'm still Draco's friend, too, and it hurts seeing your best mate too depressed to get up from his bed."

Daphne looked at him in agreeance before turning to me. "And that's how I feel about you, y/n, I don't want to see you live your entire life like you have today. You deserve better than that."

"Much better," Theo smiled weakly. "It's not fair on either of you, we can establish that. You're both screwed being forced in this... but that doesn't mean you have to let it be so miserable."

"Doesn't it?" I asked. "How can you be truly happy knowing that you're not really free to make your own choices?"

"You find independence in other ways," Theo remarked.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Give yourself power in this marriage. You have the choice of whether or not to forgive him, to fall in love with him... to even look at him, ever again! I'm not saying this will be easy, or that you deserve to live like this, but you're so much more powerful and independent than you realize."

Daphne nodded. "You don't have to like this, none of us would. But we just want to see you happy. Please, for all of us but especially for yourself, make your own happiness."

For the hundredth time that afternoon, I cried.

But they weren't tears of sorrow.

They were healing tears.

Chapter Text

As nice as it was spending time with my friends, I knew it would be short lived. I could only hide in the arms of Daphne and Theo for so long, considering how quickly Christmas was coming up and how I knew I would have to go back for the ball.

I spent the night with Daphne and Theo but in the morning I accepted my fate and apparated back home. I still actively avoided Draco, though, which made the transition back home easier. I stayed in my room, talked to the house elves, and spent as little time as possible helping with decorations.

Luckily most of the decorating had finished while I was away, so I didn't have to worry about that. Christmas was always one of my favorite holidays, simply because of the jolly energy that it created everywhere you went. That was another reason I loved Hogsmeade so much; it was like Christmas year-round.

As unhappy as I was otherwise, I couldn't help but smile at the green and red themed house and other cute Christmas appeal. The wreaths were large and elegant, there were twinkling lights everywhere. My favorite part was the gigantic Christmas tree in the ballroom. It was always what captured guests' attention, and for good reason.

The tree reached the top of the staircase in the ballroom, so it had to have been a good thirty or so feet tall. I didn't know where it could be chopped down from; maybe magic was used to make it that big.

Something I always insisted on was having an angel on top of the tree instead of a star. I thought everyone used stars so we shouldn't have one; plus, there were lots of other decorations and ornaments on the tree that my mother approved of, so she let me have the angel at the top if I so wished.

Regardless, it was nice having something to cheer me up while I was home. I could look forward to, if I was forced to step out of my room, that at least I would have something nice to look at.

That was exactly what happened when I was (not so subtly) trying to sneak from the kitchen back up to my room. I don't know how, but out of all the rooms in our manor, my mother happened to see me with a mini sandwich in hand and forced me into the ballroom.

"Y/n dear! We haven't seen you in two days, where did you go off to?"

She was upset, clearly since I'd gone off at such a hectic time without telling her, but I could tell her voice was also laced with concern. I'm sure, being my mother, she was still worried about my wellbeing.

"I just needed a moment to myself, mama. I'm here now, aren't I?"

She rolled her eyes, but still looked overall content I was back. "And not a moment too soon, clearly. Come on, Narcissa and I have been so busy planning all this ourselves."

She grabbed me by the arm and yanked me into the ballroom. I immediately felt comforted looking at the tree. It looked like it had every year for as long as I could remember. I found solace in the familiarity of it.

"It's a nice tree," I smiled.

"It's the same as ever year's, y/n," my mother noted.

"And every year we choose a good one."

"You didn't choose anything. You're lucky I have such good taste, otherwise you'd be stuck with such an ugly home that reporters wouldn't even want to come to the event."

I rolled my eyes at her remark, but I let it slide since I knew that right now if I said anything, it would only make things worse between us. I had no doubt she was upset that I'd left yesterday, so I might as well try to quell the flames as best as possible by not feeding into her insults.

Plus, I knew this was stressful for her. In her defense, the papers could rip families to shreds if they hosted poor parties. The stress of essentially the entire media was put on her shoulders. I remember a few years back when Blaise Zabini's sixth step-father had just "passed away", his mother didn't plan anything special for a New Year's Eve party. She was torn apart by the Daily Prophet.

"Well, then you've done a good job this year. Everything looks fantastic."

"What's that about you taking all the credit, y/m/n?" I heard the voice of Narcissa rounding about from behind us. I turned around and saw her walking over toward us.

She engulfed me in a hug; I wasn't necessarily wanting one, especially considering everything with Draco, but I couldn't deny her anything.

"It's so nice to have you back, y/n. We looked for you all afternoon yesterday but we figured you'd gone off somewhere."

I gave her a crooked smile. "I just needed a break. You know... stress from the party."

She shook her head. "It's alright, y/n, you don't have to lie. We know what happened with you and Draco."

I looked between the two ladies. "You do?"

Narcissa nodded. "He told us everything."

"He did?"

I knew Draco and his mother were close, but I hadn't figured he would tell her anything like this.

"My boy can't keep anything away from me," she explained. "Especially not when it's hurt him so much."

"Narcissa, I am so sorry about that..." my voice trailed.

"What are you apologizing for? It's nothing to do with me. I'm sorry for you, dear, I don't know what got into his head, telling him he shouldn't be honest with you. I had no idea that you didn't know how he feels about you."

I felt a pang of guilt overtake my insides. I was being forced to consider the reality of the situation once more, but now that it affected other people it was more complicated. Narcissa was kind to me and a sweet lady overall, but I shouldn't feel bad about being mad at her son. Clearly, she was on my side, to some extent, too.

"Do you know where he is?" I asked, cautiously. I didn't want to give away any false hope, but I might as well be aware. I hadn't known where he was for a day or so now since Theo said he was at his place.

Narcissa looked at me warily. "I figure he's gone back to the manor. I don't think he liked staying in your room alone."

"You mean the Malfoy manor?"

She nodded. "Lucius went back there for some papers this morning and said he saw Draco asleep in the library. I'd assume he's still there; I haven't seen him since he told me about your argument."

"Do you think he'll be back for the party?" my mom interjected, making me scoff. Of course, she's only worried about who will be shown to the public.

"I don't think he'd miss it," Narcissa shrugged, "but with a boy like him, I couldn't say..."

I took a deep breath. Was I ready to confront him? I'd admit, I was nowhere near forgiving him, but at the same time spending the day with Daphne and Theo who were realistic about my issue made it easier for me to come to terms with things. It was like I was allowed to be sad and somber, but also I could learn to accept my choices over time.

I was mostly okay with that. As okay as I'd ever be.

"I could... go get him. For the party, of course."

Narcissa's eyes almost popped out of her head. "That's so sweet of you, y/n, but it's really not necessary..."

"If he's gone and we're not sure if he's coming back, is there any other way?" I asked, my leg bouncing with nerves.

"I don't want to make you uncomfortable, sweetheart," Narcissa rubbed my arm. "None of this is your fault, you must know that."

"I definitely do," I smiled small, just to appease her. "But this is for the sake of the party. Wouldn't want my mother to go without her respected son-in-law when the reporters show up."

Narcissa chuckled softly. "It's quite alright, darling. You go up to your room, get some rest, and I'll make sure Draco shows up. Hopefully you'll be alright with seeing him tomorrow night?"

No, of course I won't be alright with it.

"Sure," I nodded. "Thank you."

She pulled me in for another hug.

"You're being so brave, honey."

———

An owl flew in from my bedroom window with a box around its neck. It was late at night and I wondered who would've sent me something at nearly midnight.

Once my eyes focused on the bird, I knew without a doubt it was Draco's owl. It was a dead give away with those bright orange eyes and long wingspan, indicative of the eagle owl. Nobody else at school had that owl; it was too vicious. It would only suit someone like him.

The bird landed on my bed and gave me a look. There was no way this pet would have any sort of cognizance of what was going on between us, but the way it looked at me and nudged the papers over made me feel like it was almost an apology.

I hesitantly took the box from around his neck and opened it. He pecked at the top corners of the paper, as if it was urging me on to read.

Music sheets.

The parchment was delicate and looked like this was the finished product of earlier attempts. I could tell because there were no eraser marks, nothing scratched out or mistaken. I had a hunch this was Draco's attempt at a finished piece.

My eyes panned over the many pages I held in my hand as the bird flew away, a faint hoo sound filling my ears as it flew farther away. My fingers felt the softness of the paper and its fresh scent, another indication that this must have been the newest edition.

"Sonata a y/n".

A song for me?

A few days ago, Draco let on that he played music and even hinted that he wrote a little bit, but I wasn't expecting him to write one for me. It seemed a bit much, especially since I had no idea he had this in him. He didn't seem like the type who knew much about music, but especially not so much that he could craft his own emotions into a musical manifestation.

I played piano a little, but not enough for me to be able to pick this up right away. That would take a lot more talent than I possessed. Who would know how to play this?

I inspected the pages further, looking for any indication of what it meant. I could tell, when a song was played, the mood of it or the general idea of what it conveyed, but in pure sheet music I was clueless. There were no lyrics either, so I was stumped.

I looked over at my nightstand to see my wedding and engagement ring sitting together in their box. It was like they were mocking me, but I couldn't bring myself to close the box or get rid of it. Especially since I knew I'd need it tomorrow.

Instead, I decided to take the music sheets and the rings and bring them in Draco and I's shared room. I plopped them down on the bed, just so they were out of my sight for the time being.

The rings rested on the papers which had ever so slightly spread themselves out on the bed and stared back at me. I saw a twinkle of the diamond engagement ring reflect back, like it was leaving a lasting impression on my memory before I left.

They were a pretty picture together, music and rings being the embodiment of plenty of what people think love is.

But it's so much more than that.

Chapter Text

I was almost blinded by the lights as I descended the stairs with my parents. The bright whites of camera flashes were making it impossible to see, leaving me to trust my instincts to lead me down the gold, holiday themed staircase adorned in patterns of blurred red and green.

I could distantly make out the voice of the announcer of the event introducing my parents and I as we made our annual entrance, but it was drowned out by the clamor of guests as well as reporters. It sounded like white noise to me, as all I could focus on was the touch of Draco coming to wrap his arm around me when I made it to the bottom of the stairs.

Maybe it was the heat of the lights, or the journalists shouting out question after question at us, perhaps it was even my nerves of the evening, but for once I couldn't process the way his touch made me feel. It wasn't as cold as it always was, but I chalked it up to anxieties.

When my mother pulled us over for a "family photo" opportunity for the reporters, my vision and mental capacity finally came into better clarity. I could finally focus on what was going on around me.

I could practically read the headlines of the next Daily Prophet: "Vitelli family welcomes Malfoy by way of marriage at annual Christmas Eve party".

From left to right, the photos taken would be of Draco, myself, my mother, then father. I had no doubt the reporters snagged some pictures of Narcissa and Lucius as well, who descended the stairs just moments before us. It added to the intensity of the marriage announcement, as Draco hadn't walked down with his parents.

I'd never be able to forget the questions I was being attacked with. "When did you marry?", "Was this arranged?", "Is this a pureblood tactic?", "Do you love each other?".

This summer. Yes. Yes. Couldn't say.

Luckily, I wasn't forced to answer any questions. My father took the liberty of answering very broadly, without much detail, before shooing off reporters with some security we'd assigned earlier.

The journalists scurried off, some snapping some last minute shots or hurriedly scribbling down whatever quotes they could gather on their notepads. I think I heard Rita Skeeter try to sneak in another loaded question before being dragged off by a large man in a black suit that my father hired.

I took the opportunity to scan over the crowd. It was a mix of faces, some of which I knew, others not. Some I liked, most I didn't.

My eyes landed on figures like Professor Slughorn and Snape, the former who was shocked and the latter who stood with what appeared to be a sly grin on his face. I don't think I'd ever seen Snape grin before. It was unsettling.

I forced myself to move along and noticed some parents of my classmates like the Parkinsons, Crabbes, Goyles, many Blacks courtesy of the Malfoys, and even Theodore Nott, senior, as well as Astoria Greengrass, which meant that Theo and Daphne had to be lurking nearby somewhere. I found some solace in that.

When the chatter and noise of the reporters died down, indicating that they'd left the building or at least the ballroom so that it was only those invited, I took a deep breath and tried to avoid interacting with my husband, but I knew it wasn't possible.

I was suddenly very aware of the constricting rings around my finger that indicated our marriage. The diamond felt heavier than usual, the band tighter than I remember it.

I wonder if his felt lighter.

"Good evening," his smooth voice filled my ears, causing my breath to hitch. Merlin, couldn't we have gone our separate ways tonight?

I craned my neck to face him, pressing my lips to a tight line. I didn't bother plastering on a fake smile like I did for the reporters. He'd know it wouldn't be real, anyway.

"Evening." I replied curtly.

I noticed his adam's apple bob up and down suddenly, like he gulped or had a sudden spike in nerves.

"You look lovely."

"I know."

His compliment was polite enough, but I wasn't in the mood for small talk. I'm sure he meant it, as well. I had been fitted for an elegant gown the night before and it was to my liking at the time. However, it was now less to my liking as I realized Draco and I had matching colored outfits.

"You always do," he gave me a crooked smile, clearly uncomfortable. I was hoping that if my responses were short that he'd get the hint that I wasn't in the mood for speaking.

"If you'll excuse me," I breathed, "I think I'm going to find Theo or Daphne."

As I turned to walk away, he grabbed my arm which caused me to halt in my tracks. I looked back at him with furrowed brows.

"So soon?" he lowered his voice to a whisper.

"It hasn't been soon enough for me."

A look of sadness passed over his eyes. They turned glassy for a moment before he shook his head, focusing his attention back on me.

"We haven't even had a dance yet. It's customary for the newly introduced spouses to dance."

"Customary, not required," I shook off his grasp.

A fleeting look of worry washed over him. "I know you're upset with me, y/n, but this is public news. We have to play nice here."

"This is me playing nice."

"I don't blame you for acting this way," his eyes were filled with remorse, "but could I at least have a dance? For tradition's sake, if nothing else."

I eyed him up and down. He had his hand extended out to me, waiting for me to take it. As much as I wanted to walk away, I knew there were eyes on us. It already looked suspicious enough that I had pulled away from him right after the reporters left, and I couldn't risk bringing any embarrassment to the family by refusing to interact with him.

I hesitantly reached out to meet his hand, our skin rubbing against each other as he gently guided me to the dance floor. At our precedent, many other couples joined us in a waltz.

This wasn't the first time we danced together, of course. There was our wedding reception and my family party some months ago, both of which I wasn't particularly excited to dance with him, but neither of which I had felt as conflicting emotions as I did now.

As we danced, I let myself riddle over how I felt about things. It was like I had two sides pulling and pushing against each other. One of them was urging me to hate him, scream how trapped I felt and never forget what he did to me and the implications it had on my life. The other was making me remember that despite what he did, he's still Draco. Still the man I developed feelings for on my own, and still the man that gave me chills when his icy gray eyes locked with mine.

When the song started to slow down, I felt Draco pull me in closer. Before, we were having more of a traditional dance with space between us, but he made the move to have me pressed against him. It wasn't uncouth, considering how many people we had around us and the type of event, but my face was practically against his chest and his neck was craned so that his was by my ear. It was rather intimate.

One of his arms was around my waist while the other held my hand, trying to hold some semblance of a dance frame. I was right; he felt warmer than usual.

"My father warned me before tonight," he lowly told me. It wasn't a whisper, but just a quiet tone so that nobody around us might hear.

"About?" I mused.

I felt him exhale deeply, his hot breath kissing my cheek. It held some anxiety in it.

"Some reporters might make this whole thing look worse than it is. I suppose arranged marriages were outlawed some years ago."

"That's exactly what it is, isn't it?" I sarcastically quipped back.

"You don't want your father being jailed, do you?"

My breath hitched. I hadn't thought of that... it couldn't be taken that seriously, could it? I was unhappy for the most part, but I wasn't being abused. This couldn't be such an offense.

"That's not funny, Draco."

"I'm not joking," his voice hardened, "I want to give you as much time and space as you need, honest to God, but we can't make this look fake."

"The reporters aren't in here, though," I reasoned, "there's no danger of word slipping out."

"You never know who might sell you out for a quick buck," he explained. "If you never want to speak to me again after tonight, I'll understand. But please, for the sake of our families, can we be civil tonight?"

I pulled back to look him in the eyes. They were pleading, which gave away that he was being honest. I knew when he was lying, and this wasn't one of those times. I doubted he would ever lie about something so horrible, either.

"You're not kidding, are you?"

He shook his head. "Nothing is more important to me than your happiness, but we should think of our parents tonight. They've done deplorable things to both of us, but we can't let something like this get out."

I inhaled deeply before slowly nodding my head. I couldn't argue with him there. A small smile graced his lips, looking pleased that we were at least on the same page willing to be kind to one another for our folks.

"We'll be expected to answer a few questions later tonight," he noted. "I can do the talking, if you don't want to."

I shook my head. "If we want it to look real, we should both speak."

The smile on his face inched larger. It was barely noticeable, but I couldn't ignore it.

"That's... perfect. Thank you, y/n. I knew you'd be okay with it, you're so kind—"

"Don't get ahead of yourself, Draco, this is for our parents."

He swallowed hard, looking down as his cheeks tinted red for a moment.

"You're right. My apologies... for everything."

———

"We've actually known each other since we were children," I did my best at fake smiling to appear like I wanted to be there, "we just fell in love this school year and figured there was no time like the present to marry."

The two of us had been answering question after question for nearly half an hour. Those reporters better write something good, for what time we gave them...

"I proposed right before Christmas break. We just couldn't wait to be together," Draco elaborated, tightening his grasp around my waist. I leaned into him as if we were the happy couple we pretended we were.

"Why was there no word to the press?"

"We preferred a private wedding. We're a modern couple and decided to do things our way," Draco stated.

Wow, way to be subtle. I fought the urge to roll my eyes.

"It was just a small gathering of our family and closest friends," I added.

"Mrs. Malfoy, isn't it true that just last year, you were in a relationship with prominent Ministry heir Cedric Diggory?"

My cheeks nearly flushed the color of a rose. Merlin, why would they bring up Cedric? How would they even know about him? Of course they know about him, idiot, he was a tri-wizard champion and grandson of a minister of magic.

I did my best to calm myself down and nodded, nonchalantly.

"We'd decided to go our separate ways long before Draco and I were even interested in each other." Well, at least that wasn't a lie. Sort of.

The reporter turned their attention to Draco next. "And Mr. Malfoy, you've been something of an eligible bachelor, haven't you? Linked to other pureblood witches such as the Greengrass', Parkinson—"

"No need to inquire about those past flings," Draco cut off the reporter, surprising me. He turned his head to look at me instead, gazing deep into my eyes which unexpectedly sent my heart aflutter. "Y/n is my wife now and I wouldn't have it any other way. She's the love of my life and has made me a very happy man."

Please tell me you mean that.

I mean, don't mean that.

Right?

Without a warning, he leaned down and pressed a soft kiss against my lips.

Part of me was taken off guard and I wanted to pull back, but I couldn't deny the physical response I had to him. Merlin, how I'd missed this.

It was short lived and proper, much like our wedding kiss, except it had a tenderness to it that I couldn't put my finger on. No doubt it was the perfect photo opportunity for the front page, but I couldn't help but feel it was for more than just publicity. Some part of me hoped it was, anyway.

No, no, y/n, you're meant to be upset with him.

But how could I when he makes me feel like this?

When he pulled back, there was a look of something in his eyes, almost like... longing. There was a small smile that tugged on his lips before he turned his attention back to the reporters.

They shouted out a flurry of questions, much more intense than they had all night. Draco instead announced that we'd be returning back to the ball and would be spending time with our family and friends.

Despite the shouts of reporters still clamoring for another sound bite, Draco took me by the hand and led me back inside where I felt more confused than I had all night.

Right when I knew we were out of sight of the journalists, I scurried off for a moment to myself.

"Y/n, wait—" Draco tried to stop me, but I cut him off.

"I'm fine, Draco, go dance with the guests..."

"No, you're not fine. Please, let me speak to you for a moment—"

"Just give me a second," I breathed out. "I'm sure you have another publicity stunt you can entertain."

He gave me a blank expression, his lips slightly parted and disbelief shadowing his gray eyes before clearing his throat, pulling him out of his trance. He pushed his hands into the pockets of his black slacks and slumped slightly.

"Take all the time you need."

Chapter Text

I scoured the manor up and down for any room that might be available for me to take a breather. I knew I wouldn't have long, but I needed at least a few minutes away for myself. It felt like I was suffocating from a multitude of things. The bright flashes of the cameras were enough to knock me out, but the emotions I was feeling on top of everything had me desperate to find someplace to relax.

I had forgotten how many rooms my mother had decorated for this event. Part of it was nice, walking into one of any dozens of rooms and seeing it clad in green and red Christmas colors, but the other part of me feared that meant someone might walk in or snap a picture that would end up as front page news. If the room was decorated, it meant my mother was prepared that someone may walk in. Didn't matter who; she was ready to dazzle.

I poked my head into a few rooms, most of which were occupied. Some just by a few people chatting or sipping drinks, a couple passing by trying to find another room. I could've gone up to my room, but that would make me look like a child running away and hiding. The same went for Draco and I's shared bedroom, but that would only remind me of him further which I didn't know if I could tolerate at the moment. I ruled out any possibility of going to those places.

Even thinking of our shared room sent my mind into a frenzy about Draco. I could almost hear my insides fighting with each other, trying to make a decision.

I had been grappling with the idea of moving on for days. Despite everything that happened, he was still Draco. Perhaps the way of which we were forced together was unconventional, but there was nothing foreign about him to me.

After all this, when he kissed me in front of those reporters, I still felt the same sparks that I always did when he touched me. My heart still skipped a beat, I'm sure that familiar blush of red hit my cheeks. I was never good at hiding how I felt around him, not physically.

What Daphne and Theo said replayed in my mind over and over again. I need to reclaim my independence through other ways. If that means forgiving him, fine. If it meant never speaking to him again and refusing to give him an heir, also fine. I could make that decision myself. I'm intelligent and capable enough to make my own decisions within the context of this arrangement.

We might've been legally bonded together, but that was it; my obligations to this marriage ended there. I did have more freedom than I thought. Sure, I might feel the social pressure to act wifely in certain situations, but I wasn't necessarily obligated to abide by them. That meant being a good spouse to satisfy my parent's agreement, and that's all it meant. I could make something up to account for anything I didn't want to do in our marriage, if I so decided.

Daphne and Theo certainly could dole out good advice when needed.

Speaking of... where were they?

I saw their families, which meant they must be here. I doubted they could slip away or stay home if their parents came along. Especially since they knew how sensitive I was at the moment, there was no way those two would be away.

I decided to change my mission from looking for a room to catch my breath to finding the two of them. No doubt they'd be together, and if they weren't, I'd find them both and force them together for my own moral support.

I passed the drawing room, my eyes scanning over the tons of people. No Daphne, no Theo. I checked the sun room, same thing. The study? No, father wouldn't let anyone in there. The library might have a couple bookworms but there's no way I'd see those two in there.

I paced up and down the halls looking for either of them when I caught the tall, thin frame of a brunette boy right before I almost passed that door. The gangly figure gave away it was the junior Nott.

In the music room.

I retracted the slightest bit to poke my head inside and, sure enough, find Theo standing there speaking with Daphne.

"There you guys are," I huffed, walking over to the group. "You couldn't have arranged a meeting place? I've been looking for you forever."

Theo chuckled. "We figured you'd be out answering questions all night. Didn't want to bother you."

"You did amazing by the way," Daphne pulled me into a hug.

"And you look amazing, by the way," Theo added.

I softly chuckled. I already felt better.

"Hopefully I was somewhat believable."

They eyed each other uncomfortably before looking back at me, like I missed something.

"What was that for?" I asked.

"What was what for?" Theo played dumb, causing me to roll my eyes.

"Come on, that... look, between you guys."

"We didn't have a 'look'..." Daphne sipped her drink nervously.

"Yes, you did. That 'y/n clearly doesn't know what she's supposed to know' look."

Theo exhaled loudly, like he didn't want to say whatever he was thinking. Clearly, they didn't, since they didn't tell me straight away.

"You said you hoped you were believable," Theo scrunched his eyebrows.

"Yeah, I hope I did? For the reporters. Can't have them thinking this is fake, even if it is."

"Fake maybe for you," Daphne gave me a sorrowful look.

Oh, that's what they were thinking. It felt like there was an elephant in the room that I missed completely, but they were just considering how real it must've looked from Draco's end.

"I really don't want to talk about this right now. I came looking for you two to get some distance from the Draco situation, not talk about it more."

Theo blushed red all of a sudden, bringing an unexpected flush of life back to his cheeks. His normally pale face looked like it livened, but not with excitement. By the way his body language was conveying, I could tell he was anxious.

Daphne soon mimicked this stance too, with her own facial expression looking nervous and her leg bounced like she was relieving stress.

"What's the matter with you guys?" I eyed them skeptically. "You're way off tonight."

Theo reached out to grasp my arm gently, and led me over to the loveseat a few steps away.

"Maybe you should take a seat," Theo guided me. I didn't know what was going on, but I did as he said.

"Yeah, something is definitely off tonight," I reiterated.

"Maybe you just need a breather," Daphne added. "You know, take a break for a second."

"That's what I'm doing," I lamely chuckled, trying to alleviate tension in the room. "I need to be sitting for it? While you two stand?"

Theo coughed awkwardly. "No, no," he defended. "Actually, Daphne," he turned his attention to her, "don't we have to go?"

"Go where?" I asked.

"You know, do that... thing," Theo drawled out.

Daphne looked like she had a sudden realization. "Right! That thing... the one... we have to do. At the place."

I furrowed my brows and looked back and forth between the two. "You guys are the worst at hiding things. What are you on about?"

"Us?" Daphne shook her head. "We're not on about anything. Just... made some prior engagements."

"Prior engagements? At my party?"

Theo grabbed Daphne by the arm, indicating they were to leave. "Y/n, you should stay here. Just relax... take a second away from the paparazzi... it's, uh, a good place to rest."

I raised a brow, obviously aware these two were up to something.

I decided to entertain whatever they were going for, just to see what they cooked up. Clearly something was going on, and maybe out of sheer stupidity or my curiosity-killed-the-cat levels of nosiness, I figured I could just stay back for a second and see whatever they had arranged.

I watched them shuffle out awkwardly, not sating my curiosity at all. Maybe I was getting a surprise? I could do with a puppy for Christmas...

I glanced around the room. I had to admit, even though this room left a sour taste in my mouth after the Draco incident, it looked gorgeous. There was a regular sized tree in the corner and the room was clad with gold, red, green, and various other holiday ornaments. It brought life to this music room that hardly ever got any attention. None of us played the instruments in here, but they sat and were admired.

My eyes landed on a wreath that hung over a large window that let moonlight into the room. It was so green; as I focused on its qualities, I could almost smell the pine of the plant despite being across the room. It made my lips turn up in a ghost of a smile.

It had a large red ribbon tied at the top, which descended down to hang below the pine needles. The ribbon had gold edges which seemed to glisten as the moonlight from the window hit it just so. It really was a comforting sight and brought some serenity into the empty and otherwise cold room.

Just as I was feeling the effects of some soothing sense, my ears picked up the low notes of a piano playing. That couldn't be... I was the only person in here.

The piano was faced away from me, but I was sure that the sound was coming from there. I cautiously stood up and inched my way closer, trying to figure out the source of the tune.

Sure enough, when I rounded the piano I was faced with the most interesting sight.

The keys were playing themselves.

I raised a brow suspiciously as I tried to figure what the cause of this was. Of course, the piano had to be enchanted but this was magic that we hadn't really learned before. It definitely took some outside research or information in order to cast a charm of this difficulty, because it required the wizard to not only be familiar with the song, but have the power to continue animating an inanimate object for an extended period of time.

The keys delicately bounced up and down in a timely rhythm; they clearly were being charmed by a skilled musician.

The tune itself was quite lovely. It was upbeat but not hyper or overly excited, like it had a happiness to it. It was probably due to the major key that conveyed a sense of satisfaction or contentment.

Without thinking much of it, I sat down at the piano bench. I quickly became enthralled with the melody being played that I couldn't help but keep my attention glued to it. Part of me wanted to reach out and touch the keys, but I feared that I'd mess up whatever enchantment was placed on it. I wanted the song to keep playing.

The white ivory keys, delicate and polished since they were never played, looked gorgeous as they moved up and down themselves. The black sharp and flat notes moved in accordance with their lighter counterparts, causing a smile to appear on my lips.

This went on for a few minutes, perhaps. It only made me more amused and curious as to who knew this much about music and a music related charm and could've casted it. Theo didn't play piano, I knew that much. Same with Daphne, her parents forced her to learn the flute.

When it started to slow, I was somewhat disappointed. I didn't want it to end since it was providing me with some comfort in a rather unwary time. I wasn't expecting to be serenaded tonight and it made me feel a tad happier than I had been in a while.

When the keys stopped their playing, a frown took its place on my face. I brought my fingers up to rest on the cold ivory and mimicked the movement I just saw them perform, but didn't actually press on the keys. I just delicately tapped my fingers on the notes.

"You liked the song?" I heard a voice reel from behind me, causing me to turn my neck to see who stepped in.

I should've figured it was Draco.

I immediately took my hands off the piano and stood up from the bench, not wanting to be there all of a sudden. Merlin, Daphne and Theo, why did you have to set this up...

"Wait," Draco interrupted my movement, causing me to halt in my tracks, "please don't go."

His face was scrunched up in an expression of concern, with his eyebrows tugged together and forehead wrinkled. A faint hint of red colored his pale cheeks.

"I didn't intend on speaking with you right now," I blandly replied. "Hence why I stepped away."

He sighed out. "I know that, and I'm sorry for intruding. But I thought you might've liked to hear a song."

"You didn't have to get Theo and Daphne to set this up," I huffed.

"You wouldn't have listened if I invited you."

"Then you should've played when I asked you to."

A breath escaped his lips once again. It was like he knew what I was referring to, even if I didn't directly say it. At least he was intuitive.

"You're right," he slowly nodded, "I should've."

I looked down at my feet, avoiding eye contact. We'd had such awkward interactions this evening and you could cut the tension with a knife. The air felt thicker than a muggy day before rain.

"You liked it, didn't you?" he prompted, causing my eyes to dart back up to him. His were bluer than usual, void of the gray they often hold. They looked truly like a summer's day sky, a shade of them I hadn't seen before. "The song, I mean."

"It was nice," I offered up. He didn't deserve more.

A small smile appeared on his lips, but it wasn't genuine.

"I thought you'd enjoy it. It's the second piece in my 'Sonata a y/n' collection."

My eyes widened when he said that. I knew he played, but that well?

"You wrote that?"

That smile he wore widened the smallest bit. "For you, I did."

My eyes narrowed. "I... didn't know you wrote like that."

He cocked his head to the side. "You didn't play my other tune?"

My brain racked itself for any information. Of course, the one he sent with his owl a few nights ago. Neither could I bring myself to play it, nor did I know anyone who knew how to play that well. It currently sat on a stack of papers in our shared bedroom that I hadn't touched since I put it there.

"I didn't have any way of listening to it."

He pursed his lips. A low hum came from his throat before he looked back up at me with a small smirk. "I suppose I'll have to play it for you then."

I rolled my eyes at that poor excuse for flirting; I was not in the mood.

"Tell me, Draco, did you think that you could write me a song, play it for me mysteriously, then appear as this romantic and sensitive being you're trying to be and expect me to forgive you?"

His eyebrows tugged together in a mixture of confusion and disappointment. The widening of his eyes gave away the fact he was hurt by that comment.

"No... I, uh, could never expect you'd fall for something so... tacky, like that."

I inched closer to him, something he clearly wasn't expecting for me to do. He looked a bit shocked but stood his ground as I approached him so that we were standing a smaller, yet reasonable distance away from each other.

"When are you going to realize that I don't want big gifts like this to buy my forgiveness?"

"I didn't buy you anything," he breathed out. "I wrote it for you."

"You could write me a hundred songs and I could still be angry with you, Draco."

He looked at me with wide eyes. "You... would?"

"I said I could," my voice softened. "All I've ever wanted is for you to be honest with me."

"I know that now. Well, I'm trying to know that. If it makes you happy, I'll do it."

"You shouldn't have to learn this, Draco," I shook my head. "I know it's not easy, being in the position we are in, but I shouldn't be expected to wait around for my husband to be honest with me."

His breath hitched. It caused me to raise a brow, wondering what had just changed in his mood.

"What's the matter?" I mused.

He peered down at me, seemingly holding in a breath. "You called me your husband."

"I've done that before," I reasoned, "I absolutely have."

"Not to me," he breathed out finally. "It sounds lovely coming from your lips."

I wanted to open my mouth and respond with some witty comeback, but nothing came to mind. I drew a blank entirely.

I had just criticized him, for good reason, and he completely ignored it and chose to focus on the part that appealed to him. That made sense. But still, it was sort of endearing in a way.

"You made it very clear to those reporters out there that's what you are to me," I said after a moment, crossing my arms.

He cocked his head to the side. "That's what you're upset about?"

"One of the many things."

He bit his lip nervously before exhaling audibly. "Please understand, those reporters out there... they were just looking for a juicy article."

"And you gave it to them."

"I had to, didn't I? Our families have done terrible things, but we couldn't let this arrangement be exposed. I did what I thought would make a believable story."

I shifted uncomfortably. A believable story? I know we both said a lot of things to those journalists, some were mere embellishments of the truth and some were complete lies, but my mind reverted back to what Theo and Daphne said. He looked like he was being real. Part of me wanted to believe he was.

I ran a hand through my hair. "Right... a story. That's all it was."

His eyes widened, like he was computing my feelings that so obviously read off my face. I didn't bother hiding anything from him at this point. I'd be a hypocrite if I put on a farce after my spiel about honesty.

"Not like that, y/n," he spit out, "what I said about how you made me feel... that was real. I swear to Merlin, you might not believe me, but you truly have made me happier than I've ever been before."

"I'm sure I have," I looked at him, "but don't you care at all about how I've felt?"

He scoffed, not sarcastically but like he was frustrated. He'd been civil this entire conversation, I was wondering when he might let out his haughtiness.

"Of course I have, it's all I do," he stammered. "I've been thinking how to tell you for weeks; I couldn't let another minute go without you knowing the truth of how we got together."

"So you were planning on telling me?" I eyed him suspiciously.

"I hadn't figured out when, but when we got here for Christmas, things were going so well for us that I... I couldn't stand to look at myself in the mirror knowing I was the one who took something from you. I immediately knew I had to tell you, I just wanted to be more... tactful, about it."

So he was going to tell me? That changes hardly anything, but I found a little solace in knowing that he at least felt compelled to confess to me.

"No, it certainly wasn't tactful," I breathed out, still processing.

Draco reached out for my hand, much to my surprise, and even more to my surprise, I didn't pull back when I felt his cold fingers wrap around mine. I didn't react at all. My eyes simply looked down at the contact we made and back up to his eyes. I didn't give him any sort of information, since I didn't even know myself what I was feeling.

Suddenly I was aware of our intimate proximity. In the midst of our speech, one of us or perhaps us both, had inched closer and closer.

"I know it probably means nothing to you," he spoke softly, his hot breath pressing against my skin, "but I regret all the pain I've caused you. It kills me to know that the girl I love is suffering because of my own selfish choices."

'The girl I love.'

That phrase rang through my ears and rattled my insides.

"I know it does mean nothing," I choked out, "but if you could, would you take back your decision? For me to marry you?"

He furrowed his brows, like he was preparing me for his answer. His voice dropped even lower than it already was, trailing on a silky, husky undertone.

"It's the most selfish thing I've ever done, making you marry me. I've taken everything from you, love, and that's something I'll live with for the rest of my life. But... I am selfish. I won't deny it that I've always wanted you, and being with you makes me happy; you make me happy. I'm aware it's so fucking twisted, I don't deserve to be in your presence ever again, but I could never take back my decision."

My eyes widened. Was I hearing him correctly? He wouldn't take it back?

"Draco..." I breathed out, "how can you say that?"

His eyes softened to the most somber expression I've ever seen them make. They were full and blue, like they were asking me to engage them. I wasn't being pushed out with the gray that they often hold, but rather the inviting blue was telling me to come closer.

"Because I'm being honest. I don't deserve you. I never have, I never will... but I can't look you in the eye and tell you I don't want to be married to you. I want to be your best friend, your husband, your everything. I want you to think of nothing but me, nothing except us, our life together, the family we'll have someday... and that's the most selfish thing I've ever wanted. It's the most selfish thing I've ever done and I hate myself for hurting you. But I've done it and I have to live with that, not you. Still, at the end of the day, I'd do this all over again if it meant we'd be together."

Part of me wanted to cry when I heard him say that. He was aware of the pain he was causing me, the feeling of my freedom being ripped out from under me, but he didn't care. He wanted me so badly that he would repeat this entire situation if he could. It was like my mind was aware of this information, but my body wasn't reacting. I wanted to cry, I wanted to kick and scream out my frustrations, but I had already done that.

Was any of this information new to me? No.

Despite this being the first time he told me, I knew deep down this was true. If he cared, he wouldn't have done this in the first place.

He was self aware of his greedy desires, but he didn't care. Draco truly was a conqueror, inside and out. His Slytherin ambition was his greatest but deadliest quality. It was always him, his wants, his needs. No regard for anyone but himself.

After all this, I still couldn't deny that the thought of him wanting me made me excited.

I hated him for what he did, from start to finish. But why couldn't I shake the emotions that he so effortlessly made me feel?

Even during that ridiculous press conference out with the reporters, the feeling of his lips on mine sent me into a frenzy that I almost buckled right in front of everyone. The touch of his fingers on mine made me tremble, his hot breath against my cheek set my skin alight.

It was time that I was honest with myself, too.

I wanted him.

All of him.

He didn't deserve me, not after the way he treated me. He didn't deserve for me to even look at him again, let alone be married to him, but there would always be a part of me that ached for him to be around.

I wouldn't let him have access to that part so easily, but perhaps after enough time, I might allow for him to get near. It was going to be my own personal form of punishment; have him work impossibly hard for what he could've had so easily if he had done so properly.

No measure of time will ever be enough to remedy what he did, and I would make sure that he knew that.

But I wouldn't punish myself, either. I didn't deserve to suffer because of his actions.

I looked up at him, who had been staring at me for however long I was contemplating all of my thoughts. I couldn't say how long it'd been, but it was enough time for his cheeks to turn red and beads of sweat to wet his brow.

"Why don't you play me that song? The one I never got to hear."

He raised an eyebrow cautiously, like he didn't believe what he heard.

"The song?"

"Need I repeat myself?"

His eyes widened slightly and shook his head quickly, fearing wasting this odd opportunity I was presenting him.

He cleared his throat and led me over to the piano bench, his skin ever so lightly grazing mine. I don't think he'd ever been so gentle before.

I sat down next to him and turned my head to look at him. I didn't care about the keys anymore. When he enchanted the piano to play itself, I was fascinated. Now, I wanted to look at him.

His eyes stayed intensely focused on the keys, not daring to look at me. I could tell he was anxious by the way his adam's apple bobbed vigorously when he gulped.

My eyes ran down his profile. His pointed features looked lovely in this lighting, although I'd never tell him that. He didn't deserve any compliments.

Despite him looking terrified, indicative of his trembling fingers and red skin, he was a beautiful man. The sharpness of his jaw and pointedness of his nose was a sight to behold, as the dim moonlight creeping in from the windows bounced off his blue eyes, seemingly illuminating them.

Further down, I caught a glimpse of that chain he so often wore around his neck.

Feeling courageous, and knowing that I now held the power in this relationship, I reached out and ran my fingers up his shoulder to that chain. My fingers slipped down his pressed dress shirt and pulled out the necklace I'd never seen before.

It was identical to the one I was wearing.

The one I got all those months ago out of nowhere. I'd assumed Draco had sent it to me, but I had no way of knowing for certain.

Seeing him with the chained moon and stars hanging from his neck was confirmation that he was mine. Those little pendants that I wore everywhere I went, he did too. The difference was that I didn't associate this with him, but I was sure that he did with me.

I felt a sense of empowerment fill my insides as I let the necklace drop and it pressed against the front of his shirt, the stars slightly dangling off as the moon stayed stationary and still.

He'd been playing for a while, but I wasn't paying attention. The music wasn't what interested me. It was his reactions, the way he now acted around me. He knew that he had a chance and he better not make a mistake or he'll lose me for good.

I may be his wife, but I'm not expected to be anything beyond that.

He loves me.

I may learn to love him.

He has the power to choose what happens next. I'll allow him that opportunity.