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Chapter Text

“I’m not sure I can take this anymore.”  

“Larry, I’m a Pharaoh. Not a therapist.”  

“I-I know that.” Larry looked up. The floor in ‘The Tomb of Ahkmenrah’ exhibit was cold and hard, but that didn’t stop Larry from sitting on it. He was glued to the corner of the room, like some misbehaving child who had been put in time-out.   

The nightguard had been sulking in the room nearly all night. It was a miracle the Anubis guards hadn't have driven him out by now for pestering their king. But, in all honesty, they didn't have the heart too. Well, they didn't have hearts anyway due to them being statues and all. But I digress.  

Larry looked like a husk of a man, a pathetic excuse of a nightguard. His hand clutched his chin so tightly that you would have thought he was trying to cling onto his sanity.  His face was so tense that the amount of stress lines was multiplying by the minute- soon he’d look like a drawing with sketchy hatch shading.  

In contrast, Ahkmenrah was perched on top of his sarcophagus. His chin was pointed upwards in that typical ‘Upper-class person conversing with the Lower-class’ look. He looked as though he was trying to balance something on his nose. His legs were joined together, his hand clasped on top of his thigh.  

He was the epitome of a graceful royal with his rich garments shining under the overhead lights. Or perhaps his grandiose appearance was amplified because the only other person he had for comparison at that moment was a sad little nightguard.   

Larry’s eyebrows knitted together, as if they would combine into a pair of wings and fly off his face.   

"Can't a guy just, I don't know, share his thoughts and feelings to another guy? Have a little heart to heart?"  

"I am certainly not opposed to any of that." Ahkmenrah stated calmly. “It's just that,” His gaze softened, and his shoulders slumped a little. “I can’t provide any satisfying solution to your problem.”   

Larry's chin sank further into his hand. "I know, buddy, I'm sorry. It's just," His eyes closed in exasperation, "I can't deal with the noise, the arguments, the straight up chaos!"  

“I suppose having so many time-periods making contact with one another, it can seem quite chaotic.” Ahkmenrah commented thoughtfully.   

“No,” Larry waggled a dismissive finger. “No, you don’t get it. It’s more than that. It’s not just chaotic. No-o. Its chaos. Literal chaos.”   

He began to preform various mocking voices and incomprehensible hand gestures. "'Oh, lets ride our RC car over multiple sacred artefacts.' 'Let's try and copy that wrestling video Nicky showed us!' 'No! Let's nit-pick everyone else's actions and then start an argument and then run around and then-!!'"  

"Larry."   

The night guard turned his head. During his ramblings, Ahkmenrah had hopped off his coffin and sat himself on the floor beside him.   

Larry sighed.   

“Perhaps,” Ahkmenrah paused for a moment. “They are bored.”  

Larry considered this. This was a reasonable suggestion. But he lost the definition of 'reasonable' when Teddy Roosevelt and peeing monkeys had taken over his life.  

Ahkmenrah continued. “And this boredom may have caused this unruly behaviour.”  

Larry shook his head in disbelief. "Bored? How can any of the exhibits be bored? They live next to-" He waved his hand. "Um, lions and stuff! They can- they can go from Egypt and then into a jungle in like, the span of two seconds!"  

He sighed in frustration as well as defeat. "How can they be bored?" he said in a croaky, tired tone.  

“Fifty-five years.”  

Larry scrunched his face. “I’m not old.”   

The Pharaoh smiled softly. "No, but that is the amount of time this museum has been blessed with life."  

He shimmied closer to Larry. "This museum may be big, yes. But fifty-five years confined to the same space... one would tire of the same old thing, would they not?"  

Larry looked away before reluctantly nodding. "Yeah, I guess you're right." He fell quiet.  

Looking pleased with himself, Ahkmenrah shuffled along the floor until he was nearly touching shoulders with Larry. He aimed to be a comforting presence, their shoulder contact reminding the nightguard that someone was there for him.   

The overhead lights continued to glow. Ahkmenrah pretended that it was actually the sun lighting the room. He closed his eyes and prepared himself for a content period of silence. . .  

“But!!!”   

Ahkmenrah nearly jumped out of his skin. Not that it would have mattered, though. He was used to not having much skin during the day.  

"Look at yourself, Ahk!" Larry continued. Not wanting to disappoint, Ahkmenrah looked at the ancient drawing of himself on his exhibit sign.   

"You were here all that time and look; you turned out fine!"  

“I was caged in my sarcophagus for the majority of it.”  

Now, after this comment, there was a good healthy dose of prolonged eye contact.   

Ahkemenrah blinked.  

Larry winced. Embarrassed, he scratched the bridge of his nose.   

When he first released Ahkmenrah from his grave situation, the Pharaoh had appeared so calm, so regal. But when it came for him to go back in, the mask fell. Un-royal like tears, short breaths and shouting-  

 He had gotten a lot better, or that's what Larry wanted to believe.  

Larry attempted to apologise. "Sorry, Ahk, I-"  

"There are endless possibilities, Larry.” A sudden chill filled the air. “But our minds are limited. We can only think of so many." The pharaoh stared into the far distance. He was drawing into himself.  

"Then those possibilities slowly whittle down until you're only left with one option."  

Larry furrowed his eyebrows in a concerned manner.  "And that would be?"  

Ahkmenrah looked him dead in eyes.   

" Scream. "  

Larry abruptly stood up. "Oka-ay," He offered a hand to Ahkmenrah. He hesitantly took it.  

"We need to get out mind off all this bad stuff." Staggering to his feet, the pharaoh nodded in agreement.  

"Yes..."  

Larry pattered Ahkmenrah’s shoulder in comfort. "Something that will get the others to calm down, divert their tiny little attention spans to something else."   

Mouth open, he pondered. Ahkmenrah brushed down his cape absentmindedly.   

“Like, uh, a group activity. Finger painting?” Larry looked at Ahkmenrah for a reaction. Ahkmenrah, however, was still yet to come to.   

“Okay, scratch that. There would probably be paint everywhere. You remember when Nicky brought his art homework over?”  

Ahkmenrah pursed his lips and shivered. “’The Glitter Incident’.”   

“Yep.” Larry shivered as well. “Let's not think about that too much.” he said ominously. He then tapped his chin.  

"We need... need a... we need... we-" Larry snapped his fingers. "We need a Wii!"   

A few moments of silence went by. This seemed to be a recurring theme. Every time Larry wanted peace and quiet, he got noise. But on the rare occasion he actually wanted noise, he got silence.   

The world was a cruel place.     

“Do we...?” Ahkmenrah questioned slowly.   

“Yes, we do! It will solve-” he emphasised the next word in an excited whisper. “Everything.”   

Ahkmenrah scrunched up his nose in disgust. Is this why his father had warned him not to engage with the common people? Because they have ideas like this?   

"I don't think relieving ourselves would help anyone." Ahkmenrah commented. Although he reapplied his dignified person in record time, he could not hide his bemusement. He tried his best though. This may be some modern-day ritual he had yet to come across.  

Larry paused. Why did he feel like a crazy person?  

Realisation hit him like a woolly mammoth accidently falling down the stairs. (He was very familiar with this feeling.)  

He broke out in a grin and chuckled awkwardly.  

"No, no. Not like that. Like that game console, the Wii. You know the Wii?" he explained. The pharaoh squinted his eyes in confusion.     

"You know, made by those guys who made Mario and stuff? Oh, come on, surely you know about jumping on mushrooms and saving princesses?"  

Ahkmenrah pursed his lip. “I don't think you need a therapist anymore.”   

Now it was Larry's turn to look confused. Ahkmenrah continued.  

"I think you need a doctor. You have gone quite mad."     

Chapter Text

A buzz had spread across the museum.    

No, I am not referring to that one time where a hive was discovered in the Western Diorama and the miniature cowboys attempted to tame the swarm as if they were flying fuzzy horses. 

I guess you can say they weren't very friendly neigh-buzz. 

Neither am I talking about the time where a fire-drill happened and most of the exhibits treated the buzzing alarm as the end of the world.  

Since the night of Larry’s break-down, rumours had spread from exhibit to exhibit; they all knew he had come up with some sort of solution to stop everyone causing anarchy around the museum, but what the solution was they didn’t know.  

So, when Larry emerged from the security office carrying a large brown box, his closest friends were eagerly waiting for him at the front desk.   

“What have you got in that there box, sonny?” Theodore Roosevelt asked. He was standing next to Sacajawea, their hands interlocked.  

Larry momentarily frowned. Two wax figures could find love, but he couldn’t?  

“Well,” Larry shook off his divorced-dad mentality and slipped into his previous salesman identity that he had used during his television appearances. 

“It is something that is going to change your life.” he grinned. 

Sacajawea’s eyes widened. “Is it new clothes so we don’t have to wear the same thing every night?” she asked hopefully.   

Larry’s grin faltered for a split second. “Uh, no.”  

Octavius padded to the edge of the information desk and stared up. “You have discovered a new tablet that allows us to roam around during the day?”   

“Still no.” Larry’s smile had become forced. When he saw Teddy about to open his mouth, Larry quickly interrupted him. 

“But!” he shouted a little too brash. Teddy shut his mouth, slightly offended.  

Larry internally sighed. He didn’t want to disappoint them even more. Besides, the Wii would still impress them, right? You could play ‘Animal Crossing’ and ‘Kirby’s Adventure’ on that thing. Or so he was told. Nicky was more of a gamer than him. Although, not to toot his own horn or anything, but Larry was the Wii Sports Tennis Champion of the family. 

Well, that was a self-proclaimed title. 

Larry added some enthusiasm to his voice as he lowered the box onto the desk.  

“It's actually a-”   

“Woah there, Gigantor!”    

Larry swiftly lifted the box back into the air. Under the shadow of the box, Jedediah stood protectively in front of Octavius. His hands threateningly hovered over his gun holders. 

“Watch where you’re puttin’ stuff!” the cowboy miniature hollered. “You nearly flattened Octavius.” 

He paused before adding. “And me.”   

Larry put the box onto the floor and then held up his hands. “Sorry, Jed. Didn't, uh, see you there.”  

“That's what all you big people say!” Jedediah huffed and pointed a gloved finger.  “And what do you need a box for, anyhow? I was promised humiliation at his finest!” 

“Humiliation?” Larry asked. He blinked and looked around. No one else seemed surprised at what was just said.   

“Uh, okay. Well,” Larry said. “I don’t know who promised you that. But you’re in for a surprise, because inside that box is a-” 

Octavius smirked and nudged Jedediah. “Doesn’t he mean, ‘Urine’ for a surprise?”  

“Whoo!” the two miniatures laughed and high-fived each other.  

“Phew, awh’ man,” Jedediah wiped a tear from his eye. “Sometimes it scares me, y’know? - How much ofa’ comedic genius I am.” 

Octavius leaned towards him. “But that was my joke.” Jedediah waved a dismissive hand. 

“Yeah, well, we’re a team. All your ideas are technically mine.” 

Larry raised his hands in desperation. “What is going on?” 

“Oh! Oh!” Jedediah whispered loudly to Octavius. “Bet he’s going to do it into the box!” They both giggled like high-school bullies. Larry looked around for an explanation, but none was offered.

“Does anyone want to, I don’t know, kindly explain what is going on? Is this some sort of funny inside joke? A little inside joke that the nightguard isn’t allowed to know?” Larry asked. 

“Why,” Ahkmenrah said calmly, pouting his lip and glancing at the ceiling. “I merely said to everyone you were going to present your ‘Wii’ to us.” 

“And you explained what a Wii is, right?” Larry interrogated. Ahkmenrah couldn’t meet his eye. 

“You explained what a Wii is, right?” Larry repeated in a strained, panicked voice. His mouth was agape. He thought Ahkmenrah was a good-hearted prince. But despite 4,000 years to become wise he had not lost his teenage immaturity. 

Oh, Larry would not forget this. 

Before Larry could explain himself, Teddy unhooked his arm from Sacajawea and stepped forward.   

“I, for one, find your decision most brave, Lawrence.” He placed a hand on Larry’s shoulder and lowered his voice. “Back in my day, to show my authority, I would hunt and kill the most dangerous animals I could find.”  

He shook his head and chuckled softly. “But I never would’ve had the confidence to relieve myself in front of an audience to affirm my leadership.”   

“Thanks, Teddy, but I'm not-”  

The president had already made his way back to his partner. Sacajawea slipped her hand back into his. He put his mouth to her ear.  

“Must be a modern thing.” he whispered. 

“Or maybe he’s finally snapped. People cope with stress in strange ways. And he’s been under a lot of stress.” she whispered back. They both looked at Larry with similar sympathetic expressions. Larry felt a vein bulge on his forehead.  

He took a deep breath, held for five seconds and then let out a slow, loud sigh.    

This was a technique he and Ahkmenrah had taught the Huns and Civil War Mannequins in an attempt to subdue their anger and decrease fights. The Mannequins may not have mouths, but it was the thought that counted. Actually, it greatly distressed them and made them even worse. Larry theorised it was because they realised, they couldn’t breathe. Or talk. Or scream. Even theorising didn’t help the situation as the topic of screaming sent Ahkmenrah into a tizzy.  

Speaking of Huns, Atilla was stood next to Ahkmenrah, watching the amusing situation play out. Lately, he had been very adamant on leaning the English language and would only nudge the pharaoh when he struggled to understand what had just been said. His warrior pride made him a more independent learner.      

“Well, there has been a... misunderstanding.” Larry swallowed. “But what's in here is going to change your-... It's going to stop you guys stop making a mess of the museum.”   

Atilla placed Jedediah and Octavius on each of his shoulders. Larry put the box onto the desk. 

Larry let a few seconds go by to build up suspense. This was a technique he used to help sell his inventions when he-  

“Oh, good God, man!” Octavius shouted out impatiently. “Open it up already!” 

Chapter Text

Larry opened the box.  

Everyone peered into the box. 

Inside was a black Wii console.

Larry looked at everyone expectantly. 

Nobody said anything.  

Larry shook his head slightly. “Well? What do you guys think?” 

“I think ya’ mixing up yer’ one’s and twos, komboske.” Jedediah pointed out in disgust and made a ‘yeech’ sound. “’Cus that stuffs solid.” 

“Yes.” Octavius observed with a strained face. “It’s also black. Did you know black is an unnatural colour for this sort of thing, my liege?” 

“I think you need medical attention, bronto.” 

“Agreed.”  

Atilla muttered something and Ahkmenrah translated.  

“Atilla says that the black colour can be caused by eating too much children's blood. Hang on,” Ahkmenrah turned around. “How do you know that?” he questioned.  

“Alright, everybody shut up!” Larry suddenly shouted.  

“This is not what you think it is! It is not pee- we have Dexter for that-” 

“Humans descended from primates, actually.” said a passing Charles Darwin statue. He pushed up his glasses. “So, there is a high possibility that you would engage in similar activates. Such as peeing-” 

“Dude.” Larry said. “You’re not helping the situation. Go study some birds or something.” 

“Yes, I shall. There are some lovely milkmaids down the hall-” 

“Actual birds, Charles!” Larry yelled as the scientist walked away. “Anyway-” 

He continued with his previous rant. 

 “-and it is not the other thing you guys think it is! What, you thought I was just going to go to the toilet in a box? And then show it to you guys? Geez, who do you think I am?” 

“Well, cats sometimes show off their litterboxes.” Teddy offered. 

“Well, I’m not a cat! And quite frankly, with your animal kill count, you’d probably shoot me if I was.” 

Sacajawea narrowed her eyes at Teddy.  

“That was the real Theodore Roosevelt!” the president explained quickly. “Bedsides, my dear, my gun isn’t even real! I would never.” 

“Atilla, why do you know about the effects of eating children’s blood?” a deeply concerned Ahkmenrah pressed on. 

“Okay, look!” Larry fished out the Black Wii Console from the box and practically slammed it onto the desk. Everyone flinched at the noise.  

“Wii. Gaming Console. Play games. Have fun. Stop arguing. Larry happy.” Larry stared at them all wildly. His eye twitched.  “Any questions?” 

A pause. 

“Yeah, I got one.” Jedediah raised his hand and then turned to Atilla. “Now, I’m a grown adult. But I’m the size of a child.” 

“A very malnourished child.” Octavius added. 

“Yeah, yeah. One who has never tasted milk before. Never grown them bones or nothing.” Jedediah nodded. “You’re not gonna eat me and toga boy, are you?” 

Atilla said something in an offended tone and then turned angrily to Ahkmenrah.

Ahkmenrah nodded sheepishly. "My apologies, friend." he then addressees the two miniatures. "He actually said pig's blood."

Larry facepalmed so hard he was surprised he didn’t crush his skull. 

“What did you call this magical sceptre again?” 

“A Wiimote, Ahk.” 

“By the Gods, this is simply incredible.” Ahkmenrah examined his remote with pure and utter awe. His eyes glistened. 

“Ahk, please, if you don’t focus, they’re going to- No!” Larry suddenly cried out in anguish.   

“Aha! Bully!” cried out Teddy, who had just won the game of Wii Tennis. He and Sacajawea bumped chests and roared like over enthusiastic sports fans.  

“Sorry, gentlemen, but it looks like me and the pretty lady have just won.” he flashed his iconic toothy grin and waved around his Wii remote triumphantly. 

“’Get wrecked.’” Sacajawea said politely with a small smile. She then turned excitedly to Teddy. “Nicky taught me that phrase.” 

Larry nudged Ahkmenrah. “What was that about, buddy? We nearly beat them!” 

“It was 0-3, Lawrence.” Teddy chimed in smugly. 

“Okay, you don’t need to rub it in my face, Mr President.” Larry gave Teddy a look and then turned back to the Pharaoh. “If you had paid attention, we might have won. What’s up, buddy?” 

“I apologise, Larry. It’s just that,” he lifted the Wiimote like it was Simba from the Lion King. “I have never seen something so wonderful, so mysterious, so powerful.” 

“Um, Earth to Ahkmenrah?” Larry snapped his fingers. “You have a wonderful, mysterious, powerful Tablet that brings everything in this museum to life.” 

“Yes, but this small baton can hit virtual balls.” Ahkmenrah gawped at the Wiimote. “Balls that don’t actually exist.” 

“Okay buddy.” 

“Balls that are in a different dimension entirely.” Ahkmenrah said in a small whisper.  

“Whatever you say.” 

“Now give him a moustache!” Octavius commanded valiantly; his chest puffed out proudly. “The first one on the bottom row!” 

“Moustache! First one on the bottom row!” a soldier parroted in a shrilly voice. The Roman miniatures crowded round the Wiimote like ants on a forgotten picnic sandwich. With loud battle cries they heaved up the remote and pointed it at the TV. The soldiers on top of the remote pushed down the ‘A’ button with great difficulty.  

On the Mii they were editing, a comedic curly moustache popped up.  

The miniatures cheered and wept with joy. They patted each other on the back and hugged out.  

Octavius put up his hand. “Wait, men. Give him...” he lowered his voice and narrowed his eyes. “Eye-shadow.” 

All the soldiers moaned.  

“Come on, chop-chop! I said eyeshadow, not ‘Oh, no’. I heard that, Leonidas Marcellus!” he berated as the men got to work.  

“Eyeshadow!” squawked a soldier. 

Jedediah climbed up onto the sofa next to Octavius.  

He casually put his hands on his hips. “Howdy there, partner. Watcha’ doing- is that my Mii?!” 

The cowboy opened his mouth in shock and look back and forth from the TV and a smug looking Octavius.  

“Why, it is indeed. I thought it needed a few touch ups.” he said as his men finally selected some blue eyeshadow.  

“Heck nawh, that’s gotta be an invasion of my privacy!” Jedediah hollered at the soldiers. “You quit imposing on my rights and stop that righ’ now!” 

“Calm down, cowboy. We’re giving you the right to look... fabulous.” he smirked and gestured to the telly.  

Jedediah leant on one leg and pondered. “I do look dashing in that eyeshadow...” he then shook his head and backhanded Octavius on the chest plate. “You Rotten Roman! If you were beautifyin’ me up or what not, then why do I have a funny moustache?” he growled.  

They stared intensely at each other. Before a fight could break out, Larry entered the scene.  

“Hey, whoa, guys. What’s going on here, huh? What's the deal-yo-yo?” the night guard squatted in front of the sofa so he could be somewhat eye-level with the two.  

“He’s messing with my Mii, gosh darn it!” 

“He can't take a joke! He has no funny bone in his body!” 

“We don’t have bones, numbnuts!”  

“Do not compare me to a nut, you foul fiend!” 

“Oh, I’ll keep going! I’ll crack yer’ head lika’ nut! In fact, I’ll kick you in in the-” 

“STOP!” Larry shouted. The miniatures looked up.  

“I got this Wii to stop you arguing. Now kiss and make up, okay? Shakes hands or something, I don’t care. Just be civil. Just have an actual conversation. Jed, you wanna start?” 

Jedediah adjusted his hat solemnly. “When you gave my Mii a moustache and eyeshadow, I felt like, ‘This guy's really hurting me.’ And it hurt.” 

Octavius shuffled in his sandals. “I just wanted to make you laugh- I just wanted to have a jolly little joke. And when you didn’t find it funny, it hurt.” 

They both looked at each other for a whole five seconds and then hugged it out.  

“See? Wasn’t so hard, was it?” Larry sighed. He side-eyed the Wiimote with all the soldiers on it. They had been watching the argument unfold and were eating popcorn, using their helmets as bowls.  

Larry tried to resist the urge, but he couldn't help himself. He took the Wiimote and shook off the soldiers. (“Sorry, Pavo. Oh, sorry Remus Dioc- Oh, geez, get off the strap, Markus.”) 

Once he had full control over the remote, he went into the height settings and made Jedediah’s Mii as small as possible.  

“Hey!!” 

Larry whipped round to see both Octavius and Jedediah staring up at him, their arms folded. Larry pursed his lip guiltily. 

Oops. Busted.  

“You vermin!” Jedediah yelled accusingly.  

“My leige!” Octavius shook his head in disappointment. “I know we are only about one inch tall,” 

“One and a half on a good day!” Jedediah added. 

“Exactly.” Octavius agreed. “But what you just did? That’s just plain rude.” 

Larry frowned. “Are you ganging up on me right now?”  

“We stick up for each other!” Octavius shouted out gallantly. “We are brothers in arms! And something even more than that.” 

“Yeah! Darn tootin’ we are!” Jedediah yelled. “And what you just did? That stung, Gigantor.” 

Larry raised his eyebrows. “Like the time you tried to tame that hive of bees in the Western Diorama?” he said coyly.  

Jedediah huffed. “You shut your dadgum mouth.” 

Larry looked over the banisters. He wore a wistful expression as he watched the exhibits in the main foyer. He rested his hands on the banister and sighed.  

“Hey Dad!” Nicky chirped as he ran up next to Larry. “I got you a drink from the vending machine.” 

“Thanks, squirt.” Larry ruffled his hair affectionally and took the can from him.  

“It's an Orange Mocha Frappuccino.” Nicky said.  

“A whaty what what?” Larry examined the can, dumfounded.  

“Your friend Solstice recommended it.” 

“They did? -Oh, that’s because they know I can’t stand stuff that’s named to sound cool and trendy.” Larry sighed. “Can’t they call drinks normal things, like back in the good old days?” he complained.  

“Stop acting old.” Nick giggled.  

“Can’t help it. That’s what happens when you become a dad. You start taking ‘old’.” Larry took a sip of his drink. He pouted his lip, surprised. It actually tasted nice.   

“I’m actually going to view some retirement homes tomorrow, want to come with?” Larry asked, suppressing a grin. 

“You want to go to a retirement home?” Nicky scrunched up his face in confusion.  

“No, silly. I’m going to put you in a retirement home!” On ‘You’, he leaned forwards towards his son dramatically. Nicky burst into laughter. 

“What?” Larry asked in mock confusion. “I can’t be bothered to look after you anymore. Besides, you can probably pass for eighty years old.” He grinned as Nicky crossed his arms.  

“Da-ad.” he moaned playfully and stamped his foot. 

“Just teasing you, Nicky. Hey, want to see what the exhibits are up to?”  

The boy nodded eagerly. Larry put his drink down and picked his son up from under his arms. He sat him on the banister but kept a firm grip so he wouldn’t fall.  

Nicky’s eyes widened with glee.  

The TV has been placed onto the information desk. Four of the Neanderthals were playing Just Dance on the Wii. Specifically, they were dancing to Rasputin. They hardly needed to look at the screen, though. They seemed to have memorised every move by heart. The same went to massive crowd of historical figures that surrounded them. 

It was a sight to see, really. The entirety of the museum dancing in sync to Rasputin. You really had to be there. I wish I had been there. 

“Do you think the Wii has helped with all the noise you kept complaining about, Dad?” Nicky asked as he watched on with a huge grin. He bopped his head to the music.  

Larry looked from Nicky to all the exhibits cheering, laughing and screaming as the song ended and the winner was revealed on the screen. Atilla was waving round a Wii nunchuck like an actual nunchuck. 

The nightguard pondered for a moment.  

“No.” he admitted with a small smile. “But that’s okay.”