Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Rena furtive’s DM’s

Ladybug: you done yet, alya?

Rena furtive: almost, give me a minute

Rena furtive shared an invite

Server - Le superhero’s

Bunnxy hopped into the server. Kangaroo!!

Rena furtive: more like bunny

Challenger approaching - Ladybug has appeared!

We've been expecting you Viperion.

Ladybug: have we?

Where’s Vesperia? In the server!

It's dangerous to go alone, take Pigella!

Pigella: hiii!!

Bunnxy: i fear the extra i's

Viperion: you aren't the only one

Vesperia: definitely not.

A wild King Monkey appeared.

Chat noir just joined. Hide your bananas.

Carapace joined your party.

Carapace: sup dudes!

Bunnyx: I get Deja vu every time he says that 

It's a bird! It's a plane! Nevermind, it's just Pegasus.

Welcome Ryuko. Leave your weapons by the door.

Viperion: why is this so accurate???

Welcome, Polymouse. Stay awhile and listen.

Welcome, Purple Tigress. We hope you brought pizza.

Carapace: I would definitely like some pizza

We've been expecting you Miss Hound

Big Minotaurox showed up!

Hello. Is it Caprikid you're looking for?

Rooster bold is here, as the prophecy foretold.

Ladybug: alright, everyone’s here!

Ryuko: Hello Ladybug. May I ask what exactly the purpose of this group chat is?

Ladybug: identity reveal! yay!

Bunnyx: that's sarcasm, right?

Carapace: is this a joke or something??

Vesperia: what the-

Rena furtive: She's serious. 

Chat noir: I-

Chat noir: I wouldn't have a problem with this but I've been asking for the exact same thing for the last 4 years. What's up?

Ladybug: the celestial guardian of the mother box, hes driving me crazy.

Ladybug: apparently ‘ revealing identities will help and master fu was not a qualified guardian’  and he's gonna take my miraculous away if I don’t do this.

Vesperia: yay! what a fun way to find out each other's identities

Bunnyx: tone down the sass

Purple tigress: aren't you the guardian @Ladybug?

Ladybug: He's a "qualified guardian" and I, am apparently not.

Minotaurox: you’re not??

Caprikid: I-

Rooster bold: haven't you been leading us all this time?

Rena furtive: might I remind you being a team leader and a guardian are two entirely different things?

Pegasus: There is a 0.2% of Ladybug being the only guardian in existence.              

Chat noir: I think you’re a great guardian, buginette.

Ladybug: thanks chat. alright so before we start revealing our identities, I would like to say that @Rena furtive already knows my identity.

Chat noir: I'm guessing Scarabella?

Viperion: WAIT

Pigella: Are you friends in real life?

Rena furtive: before any of you go ahead, I would like to mention Ladybug literally just broke down in front of me sobbing because there was too much pressure on her and I believe I was there at the right place at the right time

Chat noir: You know you can talk to me anytime, right?

Ladybug: thanks kitty

Pigella: I hope you feel better ladybug!!

Purple tigress: yeah ^

Bunnyx: I mean I guess you're a good team captain

King monkey: SHE IS

Ryuko: Absolutely.

Pegasus: Yes.

Viperion: 100%

Ladybug: thanks guys

Viperion: I would also like to put forward that I know both @Ladybug and @Chat noir’s identities since wish maker.

Chat noir: You do?

Rena furtive: lmao it must have been hard

Carapace: are we coming clean? cause I know Rena's identity

Ladybug: YOU LIED TO ME

Viperion: you kind of lied to me too about your identity when I asked you in the civilian form

Ladybug: SAVING PARIS IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN BEING IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU

Viperion: ouch?

Ladybug: oh my kwami sorry that came out totally wrong

Ladybug: I didn't mean it like that

Ladybug: Sorry I'm just stressed, sorry

Viperion: it's okay, melody. I understand.

Rena furtive: melody? MELODY?

Chat noir: viperion and ladybug dated

Chat noir: but that's not possible unless ladybug

Rena furtive: LUKA??!

Chat noir: Holy shit

Carapace: Luka?

Carapace: WAIT LUKA COUFFAINE?

Purple tigress: my brother?

Pigella: wait, Juleka? It's rose.

Purple tigress: ROSE?!

Carpikid: luka couffaine?

Miss hound: MARINETTE?!

King monkey: NETTE?

Bunnyx: it keeps getting better

Ladybug: this was all going so great until just a moment ago

Carapace: wtf-

Ladybug: Stop typing, everyone!

Rooster bold: How did you not trip over the rooftops

Ladybug: shut up marc

Carprikid: mARC? LIKE MY MARC?

Rooster bold: your marc?

Ladybug: I SAID SHUT UP

Ladybug: Thank you.

Rooster bold: One moment?

Ladybug: No.

Rooster bold: I'm sorry just Carpikid just called me his. I have a boyfriend. 

Carprikid: I am your boyfriend!

Rooster bold: oh

Rooster bold: oh my gosh, nathaniel? oh my gosh i love you so much

Bunnyx: NATHANIEL?

Ladybug: Enough!

Ladybug: Recap. I'm Marinette Dupain-Cheng. Viperion is Luka. Purple Tigress is Juleka. Pigella is Rose. Rooster bold and Caprikid are Marc and Nathaniel respectively. Yes, they're the same people you know outside the masks. Let's continue this in a more orderly fashion, shall we?

Ladybug: who wants to go next?

Bunnyx: im sorry can we go back to the part where Nathaniel is Caprikid? and he didn't mention it to me?

Bunnyx: dude, ive known you since you were a toddler, how could you?

Caprikid: Alix?

King monkey: ALIX?!

King monkey: who gave you a miraculous 

Bunnyx: KIM?

Ladybug: wait wait

Ladybug: If you knew my identity, luka 

Ladybug: is this why you've been asking me if I find chat noir hot?

Viperion: fuck-

Rena furtive: …LMAO

Vesperia: speaking of chat noir, where is he?

Chat noir: what about multimouse?

Rena furtive: who is this multimouse now?

Ladybug: Luka, answer me!

Viperion: IM GAY

Chat noir: …

Chat noir: for me?

Ladybug: come up with better excuses, you dated me

Bunnyx: it keeps on getting better

Viperion: look whos talking,  “ OH I WENT TO BRING JUICE WHICH TOOK ME 4 HOURS “

Rena furtive: kks[qwjwe LMFAO SHE SAID WHAT

Chat noir: that’s honestly better, she once went “ I was knitting a sweater for my cat because she was feeling cold “

Chat noir: she doesn’t have a cat 

Ladybug: alright shut up

Bunnyx: you started it.

Ladybug: Recap pt.2! Bunnyx is Alix, King monkey is Kim (which is news to me)

Vesperia: why is it news to you?

Ladybug: Master fu gave him the miraculous.

Rena furtive: side not: recap pt. 3 Viperion is gay for Chat noir

Ladybug: shut up, who's going next?

Carapace: yo bros, im nino

Miss hound: we should've known

Polymouse: Carapace broke up with Rena Rouge to date Rena furtive but Nino is dating Alya.

Polymouse: you're cheating on alya?

Carapace: what? no!

Rena furtive: I am Alya!

Polymouse: Oh.

Bunnyx: this is gold

Polymouse: I'm mylene

Minotaurox: little mouse?

Polymouse: Ivan?

Polymouse: Oh, Ivan!

Pegasus: Marinette, is it wise to pick the whole class?

Ladybug: what, have any better candidates? 

Pegasus: Max. 

King monkey: MAX 

Miss hound: Sabrina.

Carapace: nah dudette actually let the entire class have a miraculous, is my bud adrien here?

Ryuko: Kagami Tsurugi.

Viperion: not surprised at this point

Vesperia: zoe lee

Rooster bold: the new girl at school??

Vesperia: yeah

Rooster bold: cool

Miss hound: and chloes half sister

King monkey: chloe has a half sister???

Bunnyx: marinette really out there trynna cause family drama

Ladybug: ...no comment 

Chat noir: you never answered my question, what about multimouse?

Ladybug: fox miraculous chaton

Chat noir: You're so smart. Holy shit.

Rena furtive: mutlimouse?

Ladybug: story for another time

Ladybug: who's left?

Viperion: Chat noir.

Ladybug: go ahead, chaton

Viperion: psst, juls bring me popcorn

Purple tigress: get it yourself

Chat noir: I've been looking forward to these for four years of my life but Ladybug, I think you might not.

Ladybug: why?

Chat noir: You aren't exactly fond of me as a civilian.

Ladybug: I know you?

Chat noir: you might even despise me

Ladybug: thats a strong word

Ladybug: your lila rossi?

Rena furtive: wait wait wait what

Ladybug: another time

Chat noir: What? No! Ew.

Ladybug: hawk moth?

Pegasus: Ahem.

Ladybug: right of course not

Ladybug: chloe?

Chat noir: Unless she has a clone, No.

Viperion: How would that even work? 

Rena furtive: exclusive: Queen bee and Chat noir, the same person? Is this the start of Chat noir's villain arc?

Ladybug: xy ?

Carapace: that makes sense

Caprikid: he doesn't have the same build?

Chat noir: no?

Ladybug: I don't hate anyone else?

Chat noir: What about Adrien Agreste?

Ladybug: Me? Hate Adriodsij

Ladybug: HOLY SHIT YOU'RE ADRIEN AGRESTE

Bunnyx: pls give me my miraculous, I need to go back in time and experience this all over with popcorn

Viperion: told you so

Carapace: bro, dude, i love you but you are DENSE

Rena furtive: LMAO?!

Rooster bold: can you believe this guy

Chat noir: ?

Viperion: So, I'm guessing the answer to my previous question is a yes?

Ladybug: end me please

Chat noir: ??

Ladybug: good night

Chat noir: ???

Ryuko: Don’t worry, Adrien. She's just a friend. Friends fight.

Rena furtive: DID KAGAMI JUST DO WHAT I THINK SHE DID-

Bunnyx: i love kagami

Viperion: someone pls get me popcorn

Chapter Text

Server

Rena Rouge: are we going to talk about yesterday or no?

Ladybug: no.

Rena Rouge: Marinette, you cannot avoid it forever.

Ladybug: Marinette? whos that? i'm Laydybug

Rooster bold: Laydybug

Carapace: have any of you seen my bud Adrien

Rena Rouge: I don’t think hes coming seeing as how its been 5 mins since class started

Miss hound: which goes to say we shouldn’t be texting

Vesperia: point, if Mendeleev sees me texting, im done for

Carapace: I dont even dare move an inch in her class

Ladybug: don’t share personal information here

Rena Rouge: mari love, we literally told each other our names yesterday

Ryuko: I don’t think it matters.

Ladybug: WHO IS THIS MARI

Bunnyx: dude, chill

Bunnyx: we know

Bunnyx: the sooner you accept that, the better it will be

Viperion: denial aint just a river in Egypt

Ladybug: I don’t know you, scatter

Carapace: srsly, I cant sit thro this class w/ Adrien

Carapace: @Chat noir @Chat noir @Chat noir

Polymouse: I think we’re going to have to talk about this identity reveal thing especially considering we’re going to be playing football tomorrow.

King Monkey: I CALL DIBS ON CAPTAIN

King Monkey: we should do girls vs boys

Caprikid: we have like a 10% chance to win against Marinette without considering the fact that shes Ladybug

Caprikid: I’m on her team. Period.

King Monkey: BUT WE HAVE ADRIEN!

Rena Rouge: I would love to see chat noir vs ladybug in football

Carapace: I don’t want Adrien on my team

Carapace: like do we even know if he knows how to play football?

Carapace: hes been under house arrest basically for most of his life

Chat noir: you could’ve given me some credit

Chat noir: I know how to play football

King Monkey: THERE WE GO!

Carapace: dudeee, where r u??

Chat noir: photoshoot

Rena Rouge: I genuinely cant get over the fact that my best friend has been ladybug all along

Chat noir: tell me about it

Chat noir: what was the point of beating myself over being in love with two people

Carapace: how does he just??say things like that???

Bunnyx: that’s probably his chat noir showing

Bunnyx: I want Mari to check her phone so bad rn

Rena Rouge: no chance, shes doing her furious doodles rn

Chat noir: can you please elaborate on ‘furious doodles’

Ladybug: no

Ladybug: I will remove all of you from this group

Rena Rouge: I was the one that made it, sweetie.

Rena Rouge: good luck with that

Ladybug: RENA

Ladybug: I will

Ladybug: I will take your miraculous away

Ladybug: and never give it back to you

Ladybug: ever again

Rena Rouge: mari I know where you keep them

Ladybug: I DONT KNOW A MARI

Viperion: melody, just accept it

Ladybug: I wont

Ladybug: F I G H T   M E

Miss hound: considering you’re Ladybug? No thank you

Miss hound: I’m well

Carapace: okay so, Adrien can be on our team then??

Chat noir: weren’t you the one saying you don’t want me on your team?

Carapace: that was before I knew you played football

King Monkey: obviously he does, Adriens good at sports

King Monkey: thats why I will always have him on my team

Bunnyx: no Mari on the team = you loose

King Monkey: but Mari can’t fence or play lacrosse and doesn’t know karate

Carapace: you play lacrosse??

Chat noir: yes

Rena Rouge: you have like way to much free time tf

Carapace: karate?

Chat noir: kung fu too

Vesperia: I feel like the underachiever

King Monkey: so do I and i'm Asian 

King Monkey: I am Asian?

Ladybug: half Asian

Rena Rouge: have you finally come to terms with the identities?

Ladybug: never

King Monkey: are you going to be the captain for the opposite team?

Ladybug: for what?

King Monkey: FOOTBALL BABY!

Ladybug: fine

Rena Rouge: is this you admitting that we had a reveal?

Ladybug: never.

King Monkey: I CALL DIBS ON ADRIEN

Chat noir: :( but m’lady and I are a team

Bunnyx: you’re going to loose without mari and we all know it

Pegasus: There’s a 96.7% chance they’d win if Adrien and Marinette are together in the team.

King Monkey: but I call dibs on Adrien for my team!!

Rena Rouge: how are you even that sure, maybe mari and you would mess up too much if you’re in the same team

Ladybug: ???excuse me???

Rena Rouge: you two are like the biggest dorks I know

Ladybug: what does that have?? To do?? With anything?

Chat noir: I’ve played football with her before

Ladybug: might I add with the miraculous box

Chat noir: unfortunate circumstances

Chat noir: but we won

Ladybug: but someone also forgot we weren’t actually playing football and scored a goal

Ladybug: which lead to the villain getting the miraculous box

Ladybug: might I remind you?

Rena Rouge: I want more

Ladybug: no

Purple Tigress: we all agree that if Mari and Adrien are both on the same team, theres no way to win for the others

Minotaurox: She has a point

Viperion: has basically everyone in your class said ‘fuck class, I’m going to text’

Caprikid: I’m not surprised

Caprikid: I don’t think class can upstage a bunch of superheroes playing football

Carapace: What if

Ladybug: no

Carapace: hear me out

Ladybug: no

Carapace: we show up to the football thing as superheroes

Polymouse: we also have chloe and lila in our class

Carapace: im like pretty sure neither of them are interested in football

Ladybug: kill me pls

Rena Rouge: not until you accept us as our civilian forms

Vesperia: exactly. What kind of discrimination is this?

Ladybug: I don’t know who you guys are. Bye

Purple Tigress: you do you

Rena Rouge: we’re trying to get her to accept our identities?? And not accept her denial??

Rena Rouge: also question, is now a good time for me to start questioning about lila?

Ladybug: no

Ladybug: I am so not ruining my mood over that bitch rn

Polymouse: ??

Miss hound: I am insanely confused

King Monkey: can we go back to talking about the football teams?

Ladybug: you can have adrien for all I care

Chat noir: only for the teams right??

Caprikid: fehfewj???? I-

King Monkey: how much chance do we have of wining now??

Chat noir: still low, theres no way we’re winning with not only Marinette on their team but also ladybug

Chat noir: and both of them are the same person

Chat noir: that’s basically twice the creative brain on their team

Chat noir: and did I happen to mention manpower?

Vesperia: how strong can she possibly be

King Monkey: never doubt Mari’s strength

Carapace: I almost never agree with Kim but I have to

Carapace: trust us, we grew up with her

Carapace: dudette picks up bags of flour like its nothing

King Monkey: lowkey everyone is scared of her

Rena Rouge: should I be?

King Monkey: you should be

Caprikid: I can back them up here

Miss hound: ditto.

Ryuko: Personally, I’m not surprised. She’s Ladybug.

Rena Rouge: but still enhanced strength by miraculous is a thing

Carapace: key word: enhanced

King Monkey: don’t mess with nette

Pegasus: why don’t you have her on your team then?

Ladybug: because he wants to be team captain

Ladybug: say, if you defeat my team I’ll delete the video I have of your 7^th birthday

King Monkey: REALLY?

King Monkey: OH ITS ON

Rena Rouge: what happened on Kims 7^th birthday????

Ladybug: but if I win,

Carapace: here it comes

Ladybug: you have to take over patrol for me for a week

King Monkey: DEAL

Carapace: that’s it?? I thought she’d say something more challenging

Ladybug: im tired, I just want no patrols

Rena Rouge: make it two weeks

Rena Rouge: kim I am so on your team

Pegasus: What are the teams?

Miss hound: I don’t think Chloe would appreciate forming the teams without her.

King Monkey: Alya and Adrien are on my team.

Chat noir: when did I agree to this??

Rena Rouge: come on sunshine, it’ll be fun

Carapace: I’m with Mari

Carapace: like any sensible person should be

Purple Tigress: guys abort mission 

Purple Tigress: Ninos phone was taken by Ms. Bustier

Viperion: it was fun while it lasted

Bonus: 

Marinette could sense the annoyingly smug grins her classmates were giving her. Damn in, Su-han. She’d told him it was a bad idea. Avoiding any eye contact, she made her way to her desk.

“So…” That was definitely Alix. She turned to glare at Alix, who in turn smiled back.

“Not. A. Word.”

Chapter Text

Rena rouge: Not to pressure you guys or anything

Rena rouge: but when the heck are you two finally going on a date?

Rena rouge: @Chat noir @Ladybug

Ladybug: in your dreams

Ladybug: i like someone else ☝️

Rena rouge: MARI I WILL STRANGLE YOU

Rena rouge: ADRIEN IS CHAT NOIR

Ladybug: I refuse to accept it.

Ladybug: What proof do you have anyways?

Ladybug: go ahead, point out the similarities

Viperion: Both of them have a shitty daddy

Ladybug: Something else

Carapace: I felt bad for chat because of his dad

Carapace: But hey, at least he wasn't Gabriel Agreste

Carapace: andddd, what do you know

Vesperia: There's one more thing worse than Gabriel Agreste

Vesperia: Hawk moth

Viperion: Point, at least his dad isn't hawk moth

Bunnyx: yeah man

A wild Bunnyx appeared.

Bunnyx: uh huh

Bunnyx: wait

Bunnyx: FUTURE ME???

Bunnyx: hey mini me

Carapace: uh is this weird to anyone else or is it just me?

Viperion: its weird to all of us, dont worry

Bunnyx: I'm just here to revel in the chaos

Bunnyx: and as an addition

Bunnyx: they're both allergic to feathers

Chat noir: Wait a minute, are we comparing my superhero self to my civilian self??

Carapace: They both like to pun a lot

Viperion: We are, we have to get Mari to accept that you're Adrien 

Chat noir: okay?

Ryuko: I've never seen them in a room together.

Ladybug: that proves absolutely nothing!

Ladybug: you haven't seen Rena Rouge and me in a room together!

King monkey: nette

King monkey: he literally said he was adrien

Ladybug left.

Viperion: i cant believe kim actually made the most basic point and thats what broke her

Vesperia: How do we get to her now??

Rena rouge: Class group chat

Rena rouge: she won't accept an invite right now

Minotaurox: What about Chloe and Lila?

Rena rouge: I'll just remove them for a bit or something

Pigella: Isn't that rude to do?

Purple tigress: I personally dont give a fuck about them rn

Purple tigress: get her to accept it

Rena rouge: ^^

Rena rouge: I'll send Luka, Zoe, Kagami and Marc a link to join if you want to join in

Bunnyx: dude, me too

Rena rouge: future bunnyx right?

Bunnyx: yup

Rena rouge: lmao lets just hope i get this in the first try and dont send it to present alix

Server - class group chat

Lila was kicked out of the server.

Chloe was kicked out of the server.

Nino: no hesitation babe lmao??

Welcome, Marc. Stay awhile and listen.

Welcome, Zoe. We hope you brought pizza.

Where’s Kagami? In the server!

It's dangerous to go alone, take Luka!

Marinette: you cannot abuse you’re powers like this!!

Luka: green eyes and blond hair

Adrien: big anime geeks

Marinette: HUSH PEOPLE

Adrien: I can prove it

Marinette: No you cant

Marinette: and no the transformation wont convince me

Alix: boo, that’s just not fair

Mylene: What about the kwami?

Marinette: nope, nope and nope

Marinette: you could’ve borrowed them

Nino: aosj borrow a miraculous

Kim: nette are you fr?

Marinette: well, where’s the proof?

Adrien: you’ll get it don’t worry

Marinette: ???

Alix: this about to get chaotic

A tap on her desk caught her attention. It was Adrien. Marinette looked up to find they were the only ones left. Then, she slowly turned her gaze towards him. He was smiling. “Are we going to talk about the reveal?”

“You aren’t Chat noir.”

“Aren’t I?” He was teasing her. Pray luck be on his side, for if he were indeed Chat noir, she was going to strangle him.

“What’s this so-called amazing proof of yours? Your kwami, I presume,” she huffed.

“No.” He grinned, “Something better.”

She raised an eyebrow.

“Dear buttercup, ever since I met you-“

Oh no.

“-I’ve had three suns in my heart-“

There might’ve been people 20ft away who might not have heard her scream.

She was so going to tie him to the top of the Eiffel tower and strangle him.

Server - class group chat

Kagami: Have any of you caught sight of Adrien? He’s missing from fencing.

Alya: the only thing I heard was Marinette muttering under her breath on how shes planning to murder him

Luka: rip Adrien

Luka: lively soul

Nino: cool dude

Alya: such a good friend

Nathaniel: and a good team mate

Marc: good model?

Kagami: Not a worthy opponent at fencing, but the best I encountered so far.

Nino: I cant-

Alix: kagami has like??? No chill at all???

Adrien: I live

Alya: are you sure?

Adrien: for now

Adrien: going home for lunch

Adrien: she wont able to

Alya: yeah she got him

Alix: her stalking skills are way too crazy

Alix: and combined with being ladybug

Alix: man, he wouldn’t be safe if he were on the other side of the world

Adrien: thanks Alix, real reassuring

Server - class group chat

Adrien: Please soothe me, buttercup, and tell me that you love me as much as I love you~

Marinette: stfu and go sleep

Adrien: Have I managed to convince you yet?

Marinette: unfortunately, yes

Adrien: don’t you mean unfurrtunately

Marinette: no Adrien, no, I dont

…

Adrien: are you disappointed?

Marinette: what? of course not

Marinette: Why’d you think so?

Alya: hi guys this is the group chat

Alya: and btw Mari

Alya: you been in denial about his identity so it’s no surprise

Alix: the woman has a point☝️

Marinette: im not

Marinette: srsly

Marinette: I’m just

Marinette: in shock

Alya: can confirm

Alya: shes still processing

Adrien: oh

Marinette: Are you?

Adrien: you crazy or something?

Adrien: me? disappointed?

Adrien: I’m on cloud 9

Adrien: like for the rest of my life

Alix: you guys are cute and all but go to sleep

Marinette: Why are you awake?

Alya: alix and I are the 2-3 am squad

Alya: we help you guys get over your 2 am depressions and join you at 3 am for the party

Alya: and then we sleep

Alix: what she means to say is sleep is for the WEAK

...

Alya: that reminds me

Alya: how the fuck do i send the invite to your future self???

Hello. Is it Bunnyx you're looking for?

Bunnyx: I know you'd take too long, so I did it myself

Alya: what? how??

Bunnyx: magic stupid

Chapter Text

Server - Le superheroes

Rena Rouge: now that this is all done and everything

Rena Rouge: can we talk about the Lila issue or no??

Tigress: we have football like tomorrow

Tigress: I don’t want her on my team

Polymouse: Did I miss something??

Rena Rouge: basically, if Mari is Ladybug

Polymouse: Ohh. Got it.

Rena Rouge: yeah

Bunnyx: I always said it was a bit over the top to say Marinette is jealous since obviously Mari stood more of a chance with Adrien than her

Bunnyx: not to mention, shes like Ladybug ( which we come to know of now )

Chat noir: okay so first of all

Chat noir: I hate Lila and everything to do with her

King monkey: ?????

Minotaurox: You knew about the lying?

Chat noir: I did

Chat noir: Mari as Ladybug called her out in front of me

Chat noir: besides when someones lying about having a fox miraculous passed onto them by their grandma it’s a bit suspicious

Chat noir: also she’s like a major bitch

Carapace: Adrien just called someone a major bitch and I am losing it

King monkey: Why do you model with her then??

Chat noir: we made a deal

Ladybug: you made a deal with the devil???

Bunnyx: The devil might actually be better than her

Ladybug: future Bunnyx said that or present Bunnyx

Ladybug: cause I’d lose my shit if it was future Bunnyx

Ladybug: does that mean she gets worse in the future??

Bunnyx: no comment

Bunnyx: I cant???

Bunnyx: im so eager to know what happens in the future lmao

Rena Rouge: this is so confusing

Rena Rouge: cant we go for bunnyx 1 and bunnyx 2

Carapace: why’d you make a deal with her anyways?

Chat noir: so I could get Mari un-expelled

Tigress: dude that was like

Tigress: last year

Carapace: THAT LONG

Chat noir: unfurrtunately

Ladybug: ???why would you be so stupid???

Pigella: I think it’s sweet.

Ladybug: and stupid

Ladybug: I would actually rather die than model with her

Ladybug: no matter what

Chat noir: I would rather die than model at all

Carapace: whattt

Carapace: that’s crazy

Carapace: so many revelations in one day

Viperion: adrien just woke up today and said im going to drop major imp info very casually

Ladybug: lets be honest tho

Ladybug: it was obvious

Pigella: It wasn’t?

Ladybug: but he??? looked so miserable???

Rena Rouge: ma girl really out there observing him carefully

Rena Rouge: and by carefully I mean c a r e f u l l y

Ladybug: you haven’t said anything to your dad about this yet?

Chat noir: nope

Ladybug: It’s a good thing Gabriel Agreste and Chats father are the same person, I don’t have to put anyone on the 2nd spot on my ‘to murder’

Carapace: like a hit list?

Ryuko: What about this Lila?

Ladybug: there goes my second spot

Viperion: melody, why do you even have a ‘hit list’ in the first place

King monkey: the only thing im thinking about is if im on that list or not

King monkey: im just saying

King monkey: Mari is scary

King monkey: even when shes not Ladybug

Carapace: can confirm

King monkey: she can kick ass

Carapace: can confirm

King monkey: I speak from experience

Carapace: cant confirm

Carapace: I speak from observation

Carapace: because I’m not stupid enough ( like kim) to go and mess with Mari

Ladybug: why would you guys be on my hit list?

Bunnyx: I was probably on there lmao

Bunnyx: but all I have to do is to time travel and erase it off

Ladybug: ????

Rena Rouge: what the hell is happening in the future 😭

Chapter Text

King monkey: I want all of us to defeat one akuma as a team so bad

Carapace: a lot of us were present during moolak

King monkey: adrien wasn’t there

Rena rouge: omg??? I get it now it was because he was at the press conference

Chat noir: I was

Chat noir: I kept seeing you guys through the roof

Carapace: “ I kept seeing you guys through the roof” is such a weird ass thing to say I’m sorry??

Purple tigress: his dad was probably being a piece of shit

Chat noir: lol

Chat noir: but yes

Chat noir: yes, he was

Ladybug: I am suddenly reminded of the time chat called tigress ‘family’

Chat noir: we’re fellow felines

Chat noir: meow

Purple tigress: knowing its Adrien behind the mask

Purple tigress: sure

Purple tigress: ( since his dad isn’t deserving of being called family )

Rena rouge: LMAO JULEKA

Rena rouge: true though

Chat noir: he isn’t that bad

Rena rouge: *raises multiple eyebrows*

Chat noir: where even did you find multiple eyebrows???

Vesperia: rena rouge and chat noir would be like my top 10 friendships of the year

Vesperia: but on the other hand, alya and adrien

Vesperia: ehhh

Vesperia: the dynamic is so weird between our superhero personalities and our civilian ones

Rena rouge: ZOE

Rena rouge: WDYM

Rena rouge: Adrien and I are like best friends literally

Rena rouge: we are two sides of a coin

Rena rouge: birds of a feather

Rena rouge: two peas in a pod

Chat noir: same wavelength

Rena rouge: 💀

Rena rouge: I was okay until he dragged physics into this

Minotaurox btw, we do have homework

Minotaurox might I mention

Carapace: you had to remind me 😭

Bunnyx: “ same wavelength “ I-

Bunnyx: if this isn't enough to convince Mari Adrien is chat then I don’t know what is

Ladybug: I think the whole speech was enough

Chat noir: you mean the buttercup one?

Ladybug: I am never so much as uttering that word in my life ever again

Ladybug: period.

Carapace: BUDDY

Carapace: you could’ve said ANYTHING

Carapace: LITERALLY ANYTHING ELSE

Carapace: like cut from the same cloth

Vesperia: speaking of which, I NEED to know a pairing you guys love

Rena rouge: me and ladybug

Carapace: this is so weird because Alya has admitted she’d leave me for ladybug

Carapace: but that means she’d leave me for Marinette

Viperion: def not me and ladybug

Viperion: since saving Paris is clearly more important

Ladybug: LUKAA I said sorry

Ladybug: pls let me forget it

Viperion: No.

Bunnyx: Nath and me are THE duo

Bunnyx: but me and Caprikid

Bunnyx: ehhhh

Bunnyx: its literally Chat noir and anyone

Bunnyx: you're going to fight one day over who gets paired up with Chat on patrol

Carapace: I speak for everyone when I say we need to give future Bunnyx and present Bunnyx different names

Chat noir: ???

Ladybug: spoilers hello?

Ladybug: I’m not surprised at all

Rena rouge: everyone knows he stays back after the akuma attack to check up on the victims

Rena rouge: bro is the real hero here

Ladybug: EXACTLY

Rena rouge: which is why Marinette has started a Chat noir fan club

Ladybug: EXACTLY

Ladybug: wait wtf

Ladybug: no I haven't

Pegasus: It is extremely likely everyone gets along with Chat noir.

Ladybug: MAX

King monkey: DUDEEEE

King monkey: WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN

Pegasus: Doing my homework?

King monkey: WE’VE BEEN TALKING SINCE YESTERDAY NIGHT THOO

Pegasus: We’ll waste time tomorrow on football. I need to cover my syllabus.

Pigella: I haven't done my homework either

Pigella: :(((( gtg

Viperion: lol only homework? I have an exam tomorrow

Caprikid: you go to school?

Caprikid: I genuinely see you all day playing guitar and nothing else

Viperion: Why is everyone targeting me?

Purple tigress: You know who’d get along? Me and caprikid.

Purple tigress: *cheers silently*

Viperion: I’m in my final year of lycee?

Pigella: we just always see you playing guitar or that one day we saw you crying due to your break up

Pigella: but that’s it

Viperion: What is this? Attack Viperion day?

Purple tigress: I have a picture of you crying over the break up

Ladybug: sorry????

Purple tigress: thanks for the opportunity

Ladybug: ????????

Viperion: Juleka. I’m telling mom

Chat noir: why is my perspective on siblings changing

Chapter Text

Ladybug: good luck you guys

Ladybug: may the best team (mine) win

Chat noir: you’re going down bugaboo

Rena rouge: so glad Chloe and Lila aren't in the game

Rena rouge: IT’S THE TEAM VS THE TEAM

King monkey: we still haven’t decided teams tho

Viperion: why are you guys texting?

Caprikid: some of us are not here yet

Caprikid: (me)

Bunnyx: in cases like these, where we can’t decide for ourselves

Bunnyx: you know what we do?

Ladybug: what?

Bunnyx: spin the wheel.

Ladybug: that’s such a shi

Ladybug: ykw, I’m up

Ladybug: give me a minute

Ladybug: who gets to pick first?

King monkey: us

Ladybug: Nath

Bunnyx: LMAO TAKE THAT SUCKERS

Bunnyx: he doesn’t know how to play

King monkey: no fair

Ladybug: its literally a wheel

Ladybug: Sabrina, you’re with us

Caprikid: Sabrina is an excellent goal keeper-

Miss hound: :)

Ladybug: IT’S THE WHEEL

Pegasus: Kim, just go see if she’s actually being fair.

King monkey: RIGHT

Ladybug: Rose for your team

King monkey: that’s not that bad right

Pigella: I’m good at football

King monkey: YES

Pigella: you just don’t have to touch the ball with your hands

King monkey: why me

Carapace: on you

Carapace: even the universe works on mari's side

King monkey: Rena

King monkey: their team

Rena rouge: LETS GOOO

King monkey: Ivan for our team

Carapace: Ivan can you play?

Minotaurox: Yup

King monkey: TAKE THAT MARI

Ladybug: Mylene, with me

Polymouse: :)

Ladybug: Max, with them

King monkey: ??why

Pegasus: I’m starting to believe Nino.

Ladybug: guys theres only one person left

Ladybug: and its Juleka

Ladybug: we’re short of one person

Rena rouge: girl, Chloe left at the last moment

Rena rouge: and Nino, Adrien already had their teams decided

Caprikid: I have an idea

Caprikid: Marc is dragging me here

Caprikid: why not just get him to play

Rooster bold: no

King monkey: dude just join us pls

King monkey: we’re going to lose so bad

Chat noir: hello??

Ladybug: pls Marc

Ladybug: or we’ll have to include Chloe

Rooster bold: finee

King monkey: spin the wheel

King monkey: NOOOO

King monkey: WE MISSED HAVING MARC 

Ladybug: Juls knows how to play football really good too

Purple tigress: not as good as Marc

King monkey: we’re doomed

Chat noir: ??

Chat noir: do you want me to change my team to or what

King monkey: NO NO PLS

Chapter Text

Chat noir: who would’ve thought chloe would get akumatized into a football related akuma of all things

“Take that! Now, you won’t beat us.”

To say the least, Vesperia is currently dumbfounded. Visibly so.

“What part of whatever I said prompted you to team up with the Akuma?!”

“It wasn’t fair! She’s only one person.” King Monkey keeps trying to justify his move. “Besides, Viperion and Vesperia joined your side!”

Pegasus watches the events unfold from under the shade of a tree. He can make out Purple Tigress and Bunnyx beneath another tree nearby, munching on popcorn and reveling in the chaos.

The only surprising aspect Pegasus finds is the presence of the popcorn bucket in Juleka’s hands. Out of the two, he'd expect Bunnyx to be the one responsible for the popcorn.

“Only fair we have Ryuko and Penalteam!”

“THAT’S AN AKUMA, YOU DUMBASS!”

Chat noir weighs his options. Face Marinette’s wrath or get to taste the popcorn. She won’t notice, he concludes.

Ryuko skeptically eyes Chat Noir, who tries to walk over to Purple Tigress and Bunnyx in a way that seems more attention-grabbing than sneaky. Minotaurox spots the same and speedily looks away. 

“I DON’T CARE IF ITS FAIR.” Chat Noir’s decision does not fail him. Ladybug continues to shout at King Monkey.

“So, are we playing football or not?” Miss Hound tries to whisper in Polymouse’s ear. Keyword: tries.

“THAT’S WHAT YOU TA-“

“I have an exam,” Viperion groans.

Rena Rouge, being in earshot, hears the same. “The exam isn’t as important as saving Paris.”

Viperion shoots her a look. The corners of her mouth twitch. Pigella fruitlessly tries to cover up her giggles.

Unfortunately for them, Ladybug is another person within earshot. Although she doesn’t seem to think the same, she continues, and her voice jumps another octave higher. “FOR THAT LAST TIME-“

Penalteam watches them, disgruntled. Shadow moth-on the other side- for the first time, has no input to give.

The akuma flies away. Some notice, others do not.

Caprikid blinks a couple of times, processing what happened. He can vaguely hear Ladybug and King Monkey arguing.

“I knew football was a bad idea,” says Marc-his Marc as he tries to assimilate in the chaos.

Carapace joins them. They stand there, side by side, not knowing what move to take next. Nino leans towards him, and in a very diminutive voice says the words that startle Caprikid.

“Who’s going to tell her the Akuma is getting away?”

Caprikid looks between the Akuma, Nino and the spotted heroine standing several feet away. The wind carries over some of her and Kim's voices. He shudders. Tell her and face her fury? No, thank you. He looks at Nino, hoping to put his feelings into words. Nino simply nods. They both turn to watch the argument.

Is it bad if he’s craving that caramel-scented popcorn? He swears he can smell them from here.

“Wait. Where did they get caramelized popcorn?”

Chapter Text

Ladybug: and THAT, ladies and gentlemen is exactly why I said no to a superhero football match

Rena rouge: it was just you and Kim fighting

Rena rouge: we didn’t even do anything

Ladybug: THE REST OF YOU JUST FOLLOWED HIM AND JOINED THE AKUMA???

Ladybug: WITHOUT ANY HESTIATION AT ALL

Polymouse: He was the team captain

Ladybug: ISTG

Ladybug: and what about the akuma huh

Ladybug: who was going to tell me it was getting away?

Carapace: and be a sacrifice? no thanks

Rena rouge: the fact that Chloe of all people got tired of our bullshit AND hawk moth too and he just??? called the akuma back??

Rena rouge: that is crazy to me

King monkey: we should play football as heroes more often

Ladybug: never again

King monkey: it got hawk moth to call back the akuma

King monkey: did it not?

Caprikid: he

Caprikid: he got you there

Ladybug: stfu nath

Caprikid: :(beanie

Ladybug: ?

Caprikid: meanie*

Rena rouge: LMAO

Rena rouge: LADYBUG THE BEANIE

Ladybug: stfu

Ladybug: I cant

Vesperia: What is going on?

Rena rouge: no one ever knows whats going on

Caprikid: I stopped asking myself that

Ladybug: and where did you guys get caramelized popcorn from?

Bunnyx: that’s a secret

Ladybug: this was a bad idea in the making

Viperion: We should do this more often

Ladybug: …

Ladybug: luka

Ladybug: please stfu

Rena rouge: you have no right to say that

Rena rouge: poor guy had an exam

Rena rouge: but of course

Vesperia: saving paris is more important

Ladybug: IM LOGGING OFF

DMS – Chloe and Marinette

Chloe: Dupain-cheng, listen

Marinette: chloe?

Marinette: why are you

Chloe: Can’t you read honestly?

Chloe: I said listen

Chloe: that bitch Lila

Chloe: She needs to take her bs and get out from here

Chloe: And I’m sure you agree

Marinette: what?

Chloe: Unlike you incompetent friends, I’ve known since the very beginning she’s lying

Chloe: It takes only a google search

Chloe: “jagged stone’s kitten” my ass

Chloe: And of course, I’ve also noticed her specifically targeting you

Marinette: you have

Chloe: My point is, she’s gotten way over her head

Chloe: she needs to go

Chloe: like immediately

Chloe: So, I’m suggesting a truce

Marinette: truce?

Chloe: Do you need a dictionary or something?

Marinette: no no

Marinette: what exactly do you mean by truce

Chloe: so you need a dictionary

Chloe: we, you and I, team up

Chloe: act as friends

Chloe: blah blah

Chloe: and reveal all of her lies

Marinette: why all of a sudden?

Chloe: she thinks she can continue to sabotage you

Chloe: please, that was my job

Chloe: and extend “a hand”

Chloe: me? and her? same team? no way

Marinette: why not team up with her then?

Marinette: you hate me

Chloe: I don’t waste my precious time hating on you

Marinette: …you kind of do

Chloe: Only a little

Chloe: That’s besides the point

Chloe: No one is going to take your side on this because their all too blind

Chloe: I’ve got to do some groveling

Chloe: I might as well start here

Marinette: groveling?

Chloe: Dupain-Cheng, if you haven’t noticed my reputation isn’t exactly clean

Marinette: but why would you ever grovel

Chloe: such a sweet way to make me feel bad

Chloe: besides its none of your concern

Chloe: and be careful of that witch

Marinette: okay?

Server - le superheroes

Ladybug: guys

Rena rouge: didn’t you log off?

Chat noir: Miss me already, bugaboo?

Ladybug: chloe sent me a text

…

Vesperia: I’ll break the silence

Vesperia: WHAT?

Chapter Text

Ladybug: guys

Rena rouge: didn’t you log off

Chat noir: Miss me already, bugaboo?

Ladybug: chloe sent me a text

…

Vesperia: I’ll break the silence

Vesperia: WHAT?

Ladybug: she said

Ladybug: lila wanted to team up with her against me

Ladybug: but lila “needs to take her bs and get tf out of here”

Ladybug: and since none of you will “support me”

Ladybug: she feels like she needs to

Rena rouge: GIRL

Rena rouge: WHAT

Rena rouge: SEND ME THE SCREENSHOTS

Ladybug shared several attachments.

Vesperia: Maybe she’s finally realized her mistakes

Purple tigress: chloe? please

Purple tigress: as if

Chat noir: I’m with Zoe on this on

Chat noir: Chloe wasn’t always like that

Polymouse: just because her mom left her doesn’t give her the right to bully people, get voluntarily akumatized and then bully people some more

Polymouse: she also sided with hawk moth

Vesperia: you didn’t have to call her out like that

Viperion: I think she deserves this chance

Viperion: hear her out

Viperion: see if she's actually making progress

Viperion: and possibly, in the way, you could even give her some tips

Ladybug: ME?

Ladybug: CHLOE?

Ladybug: TIPS?

Chat noir: If she's taking criticism, isn’t that a good thing?

Rena rouge: can Adrien and Zoe please not advocate for Chloe

Rena rouge: its because of your relations with her

Viperion: I think he's right

Viperion: Everyone deserves a second chance

Ladybug: You’re right

Rena rouge: WHAT

Rena rouge: NO

Carapace: Marinette I love you but you are the most forgiving person I know

Carapace: and you’d forgive someone if they set your house on fire, stole all of your stuff and threatened to kill you if they just got on their knees and said sorry

Ladybug: I don’t know guys

Ladybug: you know how Chloe was before right?

Ladybug: before her mom left for New York

Ladybug: I see glimpses of that Chloe from time to time

Ladybug: and what's one more chance?

Caprikid: wait are we debating befriending Chloe??

Ladybug: not befriending…a mutual alliance

Ladybug: she cant be that bad right

Miss hound: I’m not sure about that

Rena rouge: EVEN SABRINA SAYS SO

Miss hound: but I think she’s trying to improve

Rena rouge: WAIT NO SABRINA

Caprikid: Sabrina giving Alya a heart attack by not typing the entire sentence in one go

Pegasus: You did give all of us a second chance even though we trusted Lila.

Rena rouge: THIS IS DIFFERENT???

Minotaurox: It is

Rena rouge: YES THANK YOU

Minotaurox: Chloe has never pretended to be someone else and acted as someone else. She’s always insulted us to the face. If she’s saying she’d make up for her past actions directly, then maybe it could happen. Whereas we were Marinette’s friends and still chose to trust Lila over her. In other words, it would seem like we betrayed her more than Chloe did.

Rena rouge: IVAN

Caprikid: lmaoo not Ivan too

Rooster bold: What if we see it this way: Queen bee stole the miraculous box and outed a lot of our identities to Hawk moth himself

Rooster bold: That has to count as betrayal right?

Pigella: she was akumatized

Pigella: we don’t remember what happens after we get akumatized

Viperion: What if it was only a moment of weakness

Carapace: wait wait

Rena rouge: istg if you take her side too

Carapace: hear me out

Rena rouge: I’m logging off

Carapace: we all know Chloe’s mother abandoned her

Carapace: and she strives to get validation from her mother

Caprikid: no we do not??

Carapace: I do

Carapace: now listen

Carapace: and the only person that really believed in her was Adrien

Carapace: so she clung to him

Carapace: and then came along ladybug

Carapace: who actually happened to notice her and gave her a miraculous

Ladybug: elkfjid no

Ladybug: she just found it

Ladybug: I accidently lost it

Carapace: …

Carapace: but you did continue to give it to her for a little while after

Carapace: and then you suddenly just didn’t

Carapace: so in that “moment of vulnerability”

Carapace: she gave in

Carapace: got akumatized

Carapace: and there was “no going back”

Carapace: after you gave Zoe the miraculous

Carapace: and even Adrien left her side

Carapace: and her mom did too

Carapace: on the same day

Caprikid: why did you just write a whole character study on Chloe??

Vesperia: “ I would like to present my thesis on why Chloe has done what she has done”

Miss hound: I have a problem

Rena rouge: yes thank you

Rena rouge: I do too

Rena rouge: none of this excuses her actions

Miss hound: What about me? I was there by her side too

Rena rouge: Sabrina T.T

Caprikid: LMAOO NOT AGAIN

Caprikid: ALYA IS HAVING A STROKE BECAUSE OF DISCOUNTINOUS TEXTS

Viperion: guys

Viperion: it does not excuse her actions

Rena rouge: THANK YOU

Viperion: but

Viperion: she can make up for it

Viperion: with new actions

Rena rouge: BYE

Caprikid: guys ffs pls type the sentence in one go otherwise i fear for Alya

Ladybug: I’m going to sleep

Rena rouge: WE WERE HAVING THIS DISCUSSION FOR YOU TFF

Carapace: yeah what about the thesis I wrote

Miss hound: I don’t understand why you did a whole character study on Chloe and her actions

Miss hound: but they sound legitimate

Caprikid: why are you calling out Chloe on all her insecurities without her even being present here

Carapace: but its my thesis!

Ladybug: guys stfu

Ladybug: and go to sleep

Carapace: MY THESIS!??!

Chapter Text

Rena rouge: question

Rena rouge: if you HAD to take out a superhero first 

Rena rouge: what superhero would it be?

Rena rouge: aka what superhero do you think has an unfair advantage 

Rena rouge: and NEEDS to be taken out first so you can win

Rena rouge: or you need them on your side to win

Ladybug: Chat noir

Vesperia: NO?????

Vesperia: no offence but chat can only use cataclysm 

Vesperia: and destroy like 1 object

Vesperia: and has a little too much experience being a superhero 

Pigella: there’s always his ability of killer looks

Chat noir: ASJDIU ROSE?!

Viperion: LMAO?!

Vesperia: true though 

Ladybug: I stand by my point. 

Vesperia: explain

Ladybug: sit down

Ladybug: chat has like top-notch hand to hand combat skills

Ladybug: which is normal considering he does karate and other martial arts 

Ladybug: or used to as Adrien

Ladybug: but hes also really good with the staff

Ladybug: because of fencing

Ladybug: b) night vision

Ladybug: c) destroy anything 

Ladybug: and by anything I mean anything 

Ladybug: LIKE THE MOON

Chat noir: What do you mean ‘the moon’?

Ladybug: I say no more

Rena rouge: ???????

Bunnyx: baby bug, for once I completely agree

Ladybug: RIGHT 

Ladybug: MY GOSH IF THEY ONLY KNEW

Rena rouge: ????????

Rena rouge: for one, I would take out Bunnyx

Rena rouge: time traveling is c h e a t i n g

Bunnyx: how is it cheating if its literally my power?????

Bunnyx: your power is too insignificant to take out

Rena rouge: WHO SAID THAT

Rena rouge: WHICH BUNNYX 

Rena rouge: CAUSE I GOT PUNCHES TO DELIVER 

Bunnyx: Marc

Rooster bold: I DID NOT SAY THAT?!!??

Bunnyx: idiot, your power is straight up unfair

Carapace: lowkey goated

Bunnyx: like wdym anything 

Bunnyx: bitch 

Rooster bold: Viperion for me

Rooster bold: I mean, he can basically reverse time 

Viperion: only five minutes 

Vesperia: I agree with Marc

Pegasus: I think Ladybug and Chat noir’s miraculous are special for a reason. 

Pegasus: Clearly, as they’re given much more importance.

Pegasus: Maybe Adrien and Marinette haven’t unlocked all the powers yet.

Pegasus: They soon might. My vote goes to either of them.

Ryuko: A lot of the miraculous could do much more damage if given to the right people.

Ladybug: ????hello

Vesperia: LMAO KAGAMI

Vesperia: wait who is she calling unworthy?

Vesperia: all of us or

Bunnyx: shes right tho 

Bunnyx: kim for example

Bunnyx: give his miraculous to luka

Bunnyx: wouldn’t you then try to take out luka first

Rooster bold: wait she has a point 

Polymouse: It’s a little mean.

Ryuko: The truth hurts.

Ladybug: yeah its hurting alright 

Ladybug: so basically I’m the idiot

Rena rouge: LMAO MARI

Chat noir: Ivan has pretty good power though

Chat noir: Mouse too, if the height is retained

Chat noir: as well as Sabrina

Chat noir: imagine fetching the miraculous itself

Pigella: SO WE’RE ALL POWERFUL!!

Pigella: YAYAYA

Bunnyx: I unclaim this positivity 

Bunnyx: I joined this group for the hate 

Bunnyx: the betrayal, the pettiness

Bunnyx: CHANNEL YOUR INNER HATE PEOPLE

Ladybug: what betrayal

Bunnyx: oh

Bunnyx: wait too early

Bunnyx deleted a message.

Ladybug: BUNNYX??????!

Vesperia: well the chaos is definitely in the room with us

Viperion: that is pretty legit 

Purple tigress: how come I don’t have night vision 

Ladybug: WHAT BETRAYAL?? 

Viperion: have you tried it once?

Purple tigress: no?

Viperion: you have your answer

Purple tigress: WOULDN'T I KNOW IF I COULD SEE IN THE DARK

Viperion: maybe you have so say night vision activate!

Purple tigress: LUKA 

Chapter Text

Vesperia: hear me out

Vesperia: which superhero would you take out first

Vesperia: (on a date)

Rena rouge: half of us are in a relationship, you know that right?

Vesperia: yeah

Vesperia: obv I know your answer

Rena rouge: obviously, it's Ladybug

Carapace: babe...

Carapace: Chat noir for me then

Carapace: tit for tat

Ladybug: I second that

Carapace: thanks for supporting my revenge and pettiness

Ladybug: no I meant

Ladybug: date

Ladybug: with Chat

Viperion: be careful Rena, she’ll leave you alone on the date to go get orange juice for 4 hours

Viperion: and then not return with the orange juice

Chat noir: be careful Rena, she might stand you up

Chat noir: leave you all alone, on the rooftop, with candles and rose petals

Ladybug: WHY

Ladybug: WHY IS THIS MY LIFE

Ladybug: a) I was saving Paris, b) I told you I had plans

Chat noir: we're messing with you, bug

Bunnyx: be careful rena, she might say saving Paris is more important

Bunnyx: be careful rena

Ladybug: BUNNYX YOU LITTLE

Bunnyx: dude i'm not little anymore

Bunnyx: WTF DID YOU JUST SAY I WAS LITTLE IN THE PAST

Pegasus: Did I just admit to being short in the past, would have been more appropriate.

Bunnyx: STFU MAX

Vesperia: Ryuko.

Rena rouge: ?????not on my bingo card this year

Bunnyx: we’ve been here before

Bunnyx: in another universe 

Caprikid: half of you are lying if the answer wouldn’t have been ladybug

Caprikid: because I just know 3/4 of you liked Mari and like 1/2 of you liked Ladybug

Caprikid: in both cases romantically

Rena rouge: nath calling us out on our crushes was also not on my bingo card

Chat noir: Ladybug

Rena rouge: ffs just go on a date

Viperion: I’m disappointed, I thought we had something

Rena rouge: FFS PEOPLE JUST GO ON THE DATE

Viperion: me…and Adrien?

Viperion: I mean, it could work

Chat noir: it could

Chat noir: no leaving you alone for 4 hours

Viperion: no standing you up

Vesperia: now this was def not on my bingo card

Ladybug: IT WASN’T ON MINE EITHER WTFFFFF

Chat noir: we're mostly kidding

Viperion: mostly

Chapter Text

Rena rouge: this sure is awkward

Vesperia: lets just not talk about it

Vesperia: why don’t we talk about my very cute dream to become a famous actress

Caprikid: we cannot not address the elephant in the room

Viperion: idk what you guys expect me to do

Viperion: move on in just a few weeks?

Viperion: and might I remind you it was your idea to use the gift on ourselves and see how it turns out to be

Rena rouge: I mean I don’t expect you to move on

Rena rouge: but I mean… the gift

Rena rouge: and your deepest desire being

Rena rouge: a date with Mari is

Vesperia: one where she doesn’t leave you alone on for 4 hours

Rena rouge: kind of awkward

Vesperia: and uh depressing

Viperion: she was my girlfriend 

King monkey: ex girlfriend

Viperion: I said WAS

Viperion: and why is no one taking about Adrien

Viperion: at least my dream was only a date

Viperion: his was a whole life 

Caprikid: but Mari wasn’t really in that dream

Pigella: you guys didn’t let the gift sequence finish

Viperion: SEE

Viperion: And it was totally implied

Viperion: even if she wasn’t there

Chat noir: yeah well

Chat noir: a family would be nice

Viperion: see?

Chat noir: because the one I currently have now consists of one child neglecting man who spends all his day locked in a room scribbling over his little tablet and micromanaging my life from there when he cant even have dinner with me because I have to actually schedule that months in advance and if I do get an opening it ends up being cancelled because hes always busy

Chat noir: not to mention he treats me like I’m his toy or something, parading me around so he can boost his brand up while completely neglecting my feelings what so ever for that matter and on top of all of that he locks me in my room at all times he can and weighs activities over my head in an attempt to stop me from going out or bothering him

Carapace: I was scared because you were typing for way too long

Carapace: now I’m just angry

Purple tigress: adrien, we have an inflatable matress

Viperion: yeah totally, come crash with us

Purple tigress: luka can sleep on the mattress, you can take his bed

Viperion: ???

Carapace: yeah dude always open to sharing my room with you

Vesperia: I could pull some strings and get you a room here too

Ladybug: you're always welcome to stay at my place

Rena rouge: same

Caprikid: my room barely has any space but I can convince my parents to let you use the spare one

Pigella: ^^ABSOLUTELY!

Chat noir: thanks guys

Chat noir: sorry if I went a little too overboard

Polymouse: Of course not, we’re your friends

Polymouse: say anything you want

Polymouse: and we all have place for you 

Chat noir: thanks guys, really

channel - #no chat noir

Ladybug: take your pick

Ladybug: how are we killing Gabriel Agreste?

Viperion: any way just got to end this guy fr

Ryuko: My sabre.

Rena rouge: the cataclysm

Purple tigress: the most painful way possible

Polymouse: I think we all agree with Juleka.

Miss hound: medieval torture methods

Carapace: minions,

Carapace: tonight we poison Gabriel Agreste!!

Vesperia: YEEAAAAHHHHHHH

Rena rouge: nothing is going to beat a bunch of heroes planning to poison a random civilian

Ladybug: it's justified because now even Hawk moth might be better than Gabriel Agreste

Carapace: thats a new low