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Chapter Text

When Javier arrived to the city, he was shocked by the absence of greenery. The citadel loomed high and imposing, its thick grey walls a reminder of the danger they guarded against. The heavy gate creaked on its hinges to allow him inside, then slid right back into place, walling him in. Javier looked around uneasily. He was used to open spaces and flimsy wooden enclosures, more for propriety’s sake, than to ensure actual safety. Even knowing of the dangers that surrounded them here, he still couldn’t help but flinch at the claustrophobic feel of the high bare walls. His shoes clacked dully on the pavement, as he made his way through the intricate streets into the heart of the city. Not even a blade of grass slid through the impenetrable slabs as he passed. Cold was seeping through his bones, despite the warm summer night.

“State your name and business”, a guard spoke sternly, as Javier finally reached the royal palace. Its walls and steps were white instead of grey, and they seemed to sparkle in the light of the many surrounding torches, but to Javier they seemed as foreboding as the rest of the place.

Javier fumbled in his backpack for the written pass from the king, his father.

“Mierda!” he exclaimed, as he accidentally pricked his palm on his dagger, while rummaging inside. “I’m sorry, I’m so careless”, he smiled apologetically, while extracting his bloody hand. “I peeled some fruit earlier with my trusty dagger and forgot to sheath it.”

The palace guard stared horrified at Javier’s bloody hand, the big droplets pouring down on the white pavement, then at Javier’s careless grin.

“Are you mad?” he hissed. “Cover that up quickly!” He looked around for assistance, then in his haste, he ripped a banner from a pedestal, tore it in two, and hastily wrapped Javier’s hand tightly.

Javier’s eyes widened, his smile fading, uncertainly.

“Uhh – I appreciate it but you shouldn’t have ruined that banner, my wound is not that deep to need….”

“You idiot!” the guard snapped, eyes wild. He was now on his knees, wiping furiously at the white stone bricks with the other piece of the banner. “It’s not for you…. it’s because of them…. the blood, it attracts them”. He shuddered, then he spat on the slabs and continued to rub at the stone until no trace of blood could be glimpsed on it. Then he took the piece of ruined banner, and hastily disposed of it by burning it to a crisp into one of the nearby torches. He then turned back to Javier, who was following his actions, bewildered. When the guard’s eyes zoomed in on his hand, Javier took a few steps back, cradling his palm protectively.

“Hey hey now…. You’re not gonna burn me too, are you? Heh. See, there’s no blood anymore, it’s all fine now! You did a good job of wrapping it tightly!”

The guard did not answer, just continued to stare at Javier, breathing heavily.

“Hey look – what’s your name? My name is Javier. Oh, wait - I remembered where I put my pass – it was sown into my shirt all along so I wouldn’t lose it. Back home, everyone knows me for being a scatterbrain…. But no one beats me at wielding a dagger.” With his unmaimed hand, Javier carefully extracted a piece of parchment from his shirt and gave it to the guard, with an encouraging nod.

As he studied the paper, the guard seemed to gradually relax. He called out to a another guard standing close by. The smaller guard hurried over, looking like he had just woken up. He listened as he was shown the parchment and told something, then nodded and hurried inside the palace without a word. The first guard returned his attention to Javier.

“… Keiji”, he finally said, nodding his head in greeting. “My name is Keiji. Forgive my manners, prince Javier. I apologize for the earlier words. I shouldn’t have called you mad or an idiot.”

Javier waved a hand.

“No offense taken, my friend. Don’t stand on formality. But now you must tell me why you acted like you did. It was very strange, to my eyes.”

“You are a stranger so of course you are unfamiliar with our rules. But now that you are here, you must learn them.”

“I suppose the first rule is no bleeding on the palace steps, eh?” Javier smiled.

“No bleeding anywhere in the city”, Keiji answered, without returning the smile. “Even the queen retreats in the Sealed Rooms once a month. That’s because blood is a powerful attractant to the monsters we’re guarding against. And the smell of meat, both fresh and rotten – they can smell it even miles off. No slaying of animals is allowed within the palace walls. Dead bodies are incinerated within hours. Anyone who poses a risk, such as the diseased and the mad, are kept in Sealed Rooms.”

“I assume by they you mean the Wyrdexins”, Javier said.

“Indeed”, Keiji breathed out.

“Have you ever seen one?”

“Who hasn’t?” Keiji bit out angrily, then shuddered. “We’ve all seen them.”

“I haven’t, yet”, Javier said. “But I’ve heard of them, which is why I’ve come to help fight them.”

Keiji shook his head, as if to say Javier was mad, and avoided his eyes.

“I don’t suppose you get many visitors here,” Javier went on.

“Nothing and no one enters the citadel”, Keiji answered sternly, “without our permission. Not even a fly.” He hit his palm against the solid stone wall with relish at their sturdiness.. “Look at these walls. Not a single crack in them. Built high and strong, built to last. These walls are older than me, and they will outlast me.”

“How do you people live here? I mean, where do you get your food?’’

“The fields around the citadel are rich and plentiful.”

“Yes, I’ve seen them as I walked past. But aren’t those fields exposed to the Wyrdexin attacks?”

“They are. The people working there know it, and must be ready to defend them – and themselves, all the time.”

“I don’t suppose they choose their fate willingly?”

Keiji looked askance. at Javier.

“No more than any one of us. Everyone, even the queen’s son, takes turns to work the fields. In this place, we are all warriors and we are all gardeners. We can’t afford any division of labour because the fighting never ends, and everyone is fair game, so we all know to wield the spade, and the spear. A man might go mad fighting an unbeatable monster endlessly. So we get a period of respite in the citadel for every couple of months spent in the fields. Like this – we know we are at least protected for a while, before we go again into danger. But while we are inside these walls, we must abide by ironclad rules. No deviation is allowed. You see now why I acted like I did. We cannot afford to draw them here, and risk our one and only safe place.”

“I see”, Javier confirmed. “If the danger is indeed so dire, then these rules are justified.”

“They are more than justified, they are necessary. They protect us from complete extinction. The Wyrdexins are ruthless, and indestructible. We can hope to kill a few of them, after long and heavy battle. But we can never get rid of them entirely.” Keiji returned the parchment to Javier. “But perhaps it is not for me to say more. You have an audience with our queen, and she will tell you about such things better than I can. For now, I bid you welcome, brave warrior.”

“Thank you, my friend”, Javier said, warmly. “Take care.” He clasped Keiji on the shoulder and began climbing the steps to the palace.

Javier was immediately brought before the queen in a large chamber, tastefully adorned, but just as cold as the rest of the palace. Queen Shizuka sat on a throne surrounded by several people, who were staring more or less openly at the new arrival. Javier did his best not to stare as openly at the queen, since even by a few stray glances he could tell she was very beautiful. She was dressed in a simple dress, which showcased her slimness, and had refined, delicate features. Her manner was no less royal for being warm. The queen smiled at Javier as he approached, and inclined her head slightly as she addressed him.

“Welcome, Javier”, she said, voice stumbling only slightly as she pronounced the foreign name. “Please forgive our frugal ways. Another kingdom would have welcomed you with a feast, but we hold no such things within our walls.”

Javier bowed low.

“So I’ve been told”, he answered lightly, but respectfully. “It is nonetheless a pleasure to be here.” He looked around, meeting some of the gazes fixed on him.

“That is not to say we slight our guests”, Shizuka went on. “You will take a meal with us, after you’ve bathed and rested from your journey. A room is being prepared for you. Please tell us if you require anything more. We are unfamiliar with your customs and do not want to slight you.”

“Please don’t worry about me, I may be a prince, but I’m not the coddled sort”, Javier hurried to say. “And I don’t stand much on ceremony, either.”

“That is good to hear because we don’t make use of status or protocol very much”, Shizuka said, with some relief. She smiled at Javier with even more warmth as she went on: “We all have a common enemy, and all our resources, our wisdom, our technological advances, are pledged towards fighting these monsters. And everyone, royal or peasant, takes part in the fight to the best of their skills and abilities.” Javier nodded, remembering Keiji’s words. “So we have little time for luxuries and pretence.” Shizuka paused, and a shadow crossed her face as she acknowledged, with some bitterness: “But for all our efforts, the best we have achieved so far is to contain them, so they do not spread further, to your world.”

“And for that we are thankful”, Javier hurried to say. “That’s why my father felt it was time to repay this kindness, and help in any way we can. As a sign of goodwill between our kingdoms, I was sent to fight alongside you and learn of your ways. In a year’s time, if I still live, I shall return to my land, and train others that are willing to help you in this fight. So you see, you are not alone.”

Shizuka nodded, with a smile.

“We are grateful, and greatly value the decision of your royal father. Word of your skill in battle has reached us and we are humbled to receive your help. Yuzuru? Come here, and meet our guest. Yuzuru is my son. He has had encounters with the monsters. He is a valuable asset in the fight against them. He will be your guide and he will tell you everything we know of them so far.”

Javier looked curiously among those present, but no one stirred. Finally, from the shadows falling around several great pillars, a figure approached, quiet and stealthy as a cat. He looked close to Javier’s age, maybe a little younger, of similar height and build. He approached with brows furrowed, and lips tight, no doubt trying to show warrior-like determination, but his delicate features, so much resembling the queen’s, were conspiring against him, making him look boyish and fragile. Javier liked him on sight and felt a surge of protectiveness for him, like for one of his younger brothers.

Yuzuru stopped in front of Javier and bowed deeply, as if Javier was a senior to whom he owed a great deal of respect. Javier bowed back, but then straightened and greeted Yuzuru with a bright smile. Yuzuru blushed, stumbling over Javier’s name almost beyond recognition as he greeted him formally in return.

“I have heard of your achievements”, Yuzuru said, respectfully. “I hope I can be of use to you”.

“It is I that hope to be of use to you – and your kingdom”, Javier replied.

Shizuka regarded them with a smile.

“Javier, you must teach Yuzuru your techniques. He has often praised them. That is, unless you guard your skills as your own and are opposed to sharing them.”

“We fight on the same side now, so all skill and knowledge must be shared”, Javier declared cheerfully.

“You are very kind”, Yuzuru murmured. His dark eyes were scanning Javier with unrestrained curiosity.

“Can I see your dagger?” Yuzuru asked Javier.

They were sitting on the citadel walls, seeing off the setting sun. After a meal and a bath, dressed in warm garments to ward off the chill, Javier was feeling quite welcome in this strange land, and even happy. He had always felt drawn towards the mysterious land in the east known as Yilia, so dangerous yet so fascinating – news and stories of it coming to his far off southern land rare and few. And now he was here. An uncertain future awaited him, but the thought did not unsettle Javier – it excited him. He took out his dagger and handed it to Yuzuru, with some measure of pride.

“I named it Salchow, after one of our ancestors”, he said. “Let me show you the best thing about it.” Javier took a careful hold of the blade, and bent it almost 90 degrees. It yielded easily, but when Javier let it go, it sprung back into place as if it had never been bent. Yuzuru’s eyes widened, as he tried it himself.

“Wow! So flexible. What sort of steel is it made of?”

“The guild of swordsmiths guard their secrets well”, Javier shrugged. “No other weapon has served me better in my homeland. But of course, I realize a dagger is useless in the fight against the Wyrdexins.”

“And it may still serve you”, Yuzuru replied. “But against our enemies, we usually use spears”, he confirmed. “We have valuable swordsmiths too, who put all their skills into making them.”

“I noticed you carry one of those. I look forward to learning new skills from you”, Javier said.

Yuzuru nodded absently, still studying Javier’s dagger with fascination. The curved blade was a well-polished black, with an attractive gleam, and the sheath bore a rich and intricate design with red and yellow gems. An S was carved on the handle, in the shape of a snake with a fiery tongue. Yuzuru nodded in appreciation and handed the dagger back to Javier with a small bow.

“A fine weapon. It is very sharp, so you must be careful to always keep it sheathed.”

Javier laughed sheepishly at that, and waved his palm, still tightly wrapped – he had traded the piece of banner for a clean cloth that has been provided to him after his bath, but after being cleaned and treated, the cut was not bleeding anymore.

“I see word of my misadventure at the gate has reached you.”

“Keiji is a childhood friend of mine”, Yuzuru answered. “As for your little accident….”, his lips twitched in a small smile, “it was funny”, he admitted.

Javier broke into a relieved grin.

“It was, right? I’m glad you think so, at least. Everyone here is so… well, so serious. Don’t get me wrong, I understand the danger and the fear…. But even so, one may yet find some joy in life… don’t you think so too?”

“I agree with you. I even think…”, Yuzuru abruptly stopped and worried at his lip, as if afraid of saying too much.

Javier smiled encouragingly.

“Yes?”

“Well, sometimes I think that it’s exactly because of the danger that life is more worth living, more precious.”

Javier was watching Yuzuru with steady interest in his warm gaze.

“You seem wise beyond your years,” he finally said, and Yuzuru averted his eyes, shaking his head.

“No. If I were wise, I would think of a way to end our troubles.”

“Maybe some day”, Javier said, encouragingly. “You must not give up hope.” He paused, thinking of a way to cheer up Yuzuru. “I have heard of you too, you know. Your skill in battle precedes you.”

“I am skilled with the spear, and with the bow and arrow”, Yuzuru acknowledged, with pride in his voice. He handed Javier his spear. “I named it Axel. It can reach a target ten metres away. I keep it polished and sharpened, even when I don’t use it – I’m always ready to fight.”

Javier whistled appreciatively, as he handled the weapon, assessing its unfamiliar weight in its hands.

“I’ve never wielded a spear. I hope I will be a fast learner.”

“I know you will be”, Yuzuru said, with a certainty which made Javier smile. “I will teach you fast and well. Spears are useful weapons, very useful, so we don’t have to … get too close.” His lips tightened. “But….”

“But what?”

“I don’t want to discourage you from the very beginning. But I suppose it’s something you’ll find out, sooner or later. The Wyrdexins have strong outer shells which they can hide into like snails if they are threatened. Those shells are impenetrable by any weapon we have yet devised. Our people are working to develop better weapons, research with volcano lava looks promising. But until then, speed is our only advantage.”

Javier nodded.

“I see”, he said, neutrally, trying not to look crestfallen. He never expected things to be easy. If things were easy, he wouln’t be needed here.

Javier gave the spear back to Yuzuru, and, looking up, a slow-moving procession on one of the winding streets caught his eye. Several people – men and women, dressed in white and carrying cherry blossoms, made their way through the gathering dusk.

“What is that?” Javier asked, pointing. “What are they doing?”

“Oh”, Yuzuru said, as he stood up. “With your arrival, I almost forgot. It is the coming of spring ceremony. Do you want to see?”

“I’d really like that, yes. Can we?”

“Of course”, Yuzuru nodded, and took Javier’s arm to lead him.

They made their way down the street towards the procession and soon caught up with them. From a distance, Javier thought they walked in a formal, organized manner, however once they joined them, he realized the people were mingling, chatting and laughing among themselves. It was not a formal affair. They held not only cherry blossom branches, but also wheat spikes, orchids, and wild mint, as well as a few other plants Javier could not identify. The evening air was pleasantly fragrant with their mingled scent. Yuzuru and Javier were welcomed by the group of people, despite the fact that they were not dressed for the occasion, and given cherry blossoms and leafy twigs to carry.

“Tonight we are thanking the goddess, the protector of our lands”, Yuzuru explained to Javier, in low tones. “We lay these offerings as a token of the land’s prosperity that she has granted us. This way we show our thanks, and ask her continued blessing, so that she remains at peace for yet another year.”

They turned a corner and Javier was surprised and elated to see a place with a few trees, grass and flowers. It was a feast for his eyes and heart, and he sighed happily. There were still hard stones among them, though – and the group made its way towards a stone slab that was higher than the rest. On the slab, there was a large yet very lifelike statue of a woman lying down, a sword on her chest.

“Our goddess sleeps here”, Yuzuru said, touching the cold stone with his fingers. He set down his offering, and the others followed suit.

“She’s dead?” Javier asked, taken aback.

“No,” Yuzuru answered. “She’s asleep. She sleeps and dreams a long dream of peace of prosperity that protects us like a magic spell.”

“I don’t understand”, Javier confessed. “Where I come from, the gods are awake. They make alliances and have love trysts and quarrels. They fight in battles just like us, regular mortals.”

“Our goddess can fight too. But she only wakes to fight when the danger is so dire that the citadel is poised to fall. When this happens, the enemies stand no chance against her, she destroys everything. While she is at rest in the heart of the citadel, her peaceful sleep ensures bounty to our land. The crops flourish, the animals thrive, the people multiply. If she were to wake up, there would be drought and famine.”

“I suppose it is not an easy choice to wake her, then”, Javier said.

“We cannot wake her ourselves”, Yuzuru answered, “she knows when it is time. Only once in living memory did she wake up”, Yuzuru continued, anticipating Javier’s next question. “The enemy was vanquished, but at a great cost to us, many people died of hunger and disease.”

Javier studied the unmoving stone.

“Does she know then, of your plight with the Wyrdexins?” he asked, on a low tone so none of the people around could hear.

Yuzuru shrugged.

“But if it were your choice”, Javier pressed on, “would you have her wake this time or not?”

“I don’t know”, Yuzuru answered slowly, after a short pause. “Perhaps it’s better that it’s not something we can decide for ourselves.”

“But if you could somehow wake the goddess, would that be an end to the Wyrdexins, once and for all? If so, wouldn’t it be worth it?” Javier insisted.

Yuzuru paused even longer now to answer. He arranged the offering of cherry blossoms on the slab, with focused attention. Finally he answered, on an even tone:

“Who knows? Maybe the danger would merely be averted, pushed back for a while, but not entirely erased.”

The people around them were now chanting, a haunting melody – unfamiliar but alluring, that went to Javier’s head like wine. He closed his eyes, enjoying the evening breeze on his face, and the rustle of leaves. He didn’t know whether or not he was mad, but he felt happy, even with the apprehension of things to come. The song he heard seemed to echo that – there was sorrow there, but there was also the stir of joy, the memory and presence of beauty, and life that must be protected. Javier inched closer to Yuzuru so he could whisper to him another stray thought:

“This ceremony… if you skip it one year what happens? Will the goddess wake?”

Yuzuru shivered at the words, or maybe at the low whisper, and Javier’s proximity. He twitched restlessly – Javier’s hip was pressed to his - but he did not move away. He shook his head.

“I don’t think so”, he answered in a similar whisper. “It would mean we’re ungrateful, not in danger. The goddess might punish us otherwise. But I’m not sure. No one’s done it before.”

“Are you uncomfortable?” Javier teased him, pulling him even closer by his waist. When Yuzuru turned to look at him abruptly, surprised, Javier blinked at him innocently: “By my questions. I don’t mean to be annoying. But I guess I’m very nosy and I have no filter.”

Yuzuru gave him a subtle smile.

“You are a foreigner. You get some leeway because you’re unfamiliar with our habits. We value few words, and only act after careful consideration. But I know that your people are very talkative and open and… touch each other a lot.”

“So you endure it”, Javier grinned.

Yuzuru blushed, and scowled:

“I am being polite.”

Javier burst into loud laughter.

“I do talk a lot, and I am very tactile. But if any of it makes you feel uncomfortable, feel free to tell me off. I won’t be offended.”

Yuzuru made a non-committal noise. Still resting his hand easily on Yuzuru’s waist, Javier sighed deeply. It might have been a moment for silence, but Javier couldn’t help but voice his thoughts:

“It’s so pleasant here”, he said, “among the trees and grass. What I’ve seen so far of the city is so oppressingly bare. I mean no offence, the city is beautiful”, he quickly added.

Yuzuru shook his head.

“I know what you mean. Somehow it is a relief to be out in the fields, despite the danger.”

“But why do you keep the city this way? I understand not attracting them by reckless actions but… surely a few trees wouldn’t do any harm.”

Yuzuru shrugged.

“I suppose it was designed to be as inhospitable as possible, to disguise it as a barren, uninhabitable place, that definitely couldn’t serve as a shelter. The Wyrdexins still haven’t found it, so we did a good job.”

“Just bare, sturdy stone”, Javier murmured, remembered Keiji’s words.

“Yes. One thing the Wyrdexins don’t like is the cold. This is why here, inside the citadel, we live like this.”

“It’s not very nice for humans, either,” Javier piped in. “But I suppose people can still find ways to keep warm at night”, he couldn’t help adding, with a suggestive grin.

Yuzuru either didn’t understand, or he chose to ignore Javier’s blatant flirting. Instead, he turned dark serious eyes to Javier.

“It’s not very nice, but it’s effective”, Yuzuru said, earnestly. “Safety comes at a price. The Wyrdexins like the same things we like – tress, greenery, water, meat and fruit – everything that gives life. They thrive on our very bounty. They are so dependent on us that the surest way to kill them is to destroy ourselves. Because we cannot entirely hold them back, we must resign ourselves to their pillaging of our crops and animals, otherwise they turn on us as a food source.”

The people around them had finished the song, and there was a momentary lull, a silence interrupted only by the rustle of leaves in the wind.

“They’re like parasites”, Javier realized, “big bloodthirsty parasites.”

“It used to be even worse. There was a time when we kept Wyrdexins at bay by paying them a heavy tribute twice a year.”

“Can’t you still do that? It would be some sort of compromise”, Javier said.

“The tribute was children”, Yuzuru explained, and Javier winced, horrified. “Newborn babies were their favourites, but up to 5 years old were accepted too.”

Javier remained silent, and merely nodded to show he understood.

“I was supposed to be given to them. I was five at the time.”

“But you’re the queen’s son”, Javier said, bewildered.

“There were very few others to choose from. It got so bad that people just stopped having children, out of fear that they’d be made tributes. Our people were dying out.”

“What happened? How did you survive?”

“I was rescued. Our people decided enough was enough – they were tired of living like slaves, giving up their own flesh and blood to the Wyrdexins – they saw no hope for the future, and decided even death was better. There was a big battle, and I was rescued – along with other children who didn’t get … who managed to survive that long. Keiji was among them too – you met him at the gates – he’s my age, and has been my childhood friend.”

“The one who…”, Javier trailed off. Keiji’s panicked behaviour made more sense now – he had seen them up close, he had waited for death in their clutches. Yuzuru did too.

“He’s a good man, a brave man. But the shock was too much for him. Now he rarely joins us in the fields – but he is a valuable asset at the gates,” Yuzuru said, averting his eyes and Javier understood. Keiji was terrified of meeting those creatures again, and he wasn’t forced to do so against his will. Yuzuru went on: “Anyway, we were rescued, but many people lost their life. The fight was bloody, and even though they managed to ward off the Wyrdexins for a while, it wasn’t long before they grew bolder and bolder. Now that they were denied their tribute, it was open conflict, and they feel entitled to feast freely whenever they feel like it – on our meat and crops - and on us.”

The people around had begun a plaintive chant which sounded like the cries of distant birds. Javier found it beautiful. They were holding hands and swaying slightly, forming a circle around the tomb of the goddess, heads turned upwards as their voices rose to the sky.

“So you built this citadel,” he reflected, more to himself than to Yuzuru.

“The citadel is very old, it’s been long used by our ancestors as a fortress. But after this fight, it was reinforced and repurposed. The people huddled here for safety while a strong army was trained to keep the creatures at bay – they were supposed to protect the people working the fields and ultimately destroy the Wyrdexins altogether.” Yuzuru smiled sadly. “They had too much hope. The army was beaten back, and the people in the fields massacred and devoured as easy prey. So then, the queen decided, everyone must know how to fight. It is the first thing a child learns – how to fight these creatures – how to recognize their traces, how to be wary of their spells. It is never foolproof – and it is never enough – but it is the best we can do with the knowledge we have. We must strive for more knowledge - and more courage.”

“I cannot imagine”, Javier murmured, gazing ahead beyond the circle of people into darkness, “how it is to live constantly under threat, under a shadow of fear.”

“Yet we live”, Yuzuru said, shrugging. “People don’t need much, in the end. Life will ever prevail, if only there is hope for a meal tomorrow.”

“In my city”, Javier said reminiscently, “there are festivals and celebrations, and careless joy free from any shadow. I never realized before how precious they are. I even found them dull at times.” He chuckled, “I am so stupid.”

“No, not stupid”, Yuzuru smiled. “Just unaware. We are glad to have you that way. It is a comfort to us that we can keep some parts of this world free from danger, even if it’s sometimes a bitter comfort.”

“You’re younger than me, aren’t you? Yuzuru”, Javier pronounced the unfamiliar name slowly and carefully, certain that he was doing a bad job of pronouncing it properly, but liking the feel of it on his tongue.”

“I’m 21”, Yuzuru said.

“I’m 24”, Javier offered. “So why do you sound so much older?”

He said it lightly, not really expecting an answer, but Yuzuru answered thoughtfully:

“I don’t know. Maybe it’s because I had no childhood”, he added flatly, and Javier’s heart squeezed with pity for him.

He reached out tentatively towards Yuzuru’s hand, barely touching his fingers, in a gesture of comfort. Javier was used to giving big hugs and kisses on the cheek, according to his people’s customs. He knew the Yilians were much more restrained, so he was afraid of overstepping. Yuzuru looked down at their hands with wide eyes, and Javier made to beat a hasty retreat. But then Yuzuru turned his palm and grabbed Javier’s hand in a firm clasp. His handshake was surprisingly strong, even though his slender hand was smaller than Javier’s.

“...happy you’re here, Javier”, Yuzuru said, almost shyly, the mumble making it unclear whether he meant his people or himself.

Javier chuckled fondly at the way Yuzuru pointedly struggled to pronounce every syllable of his name, like it was a very important mission.

“Call me Javi”, he said, squeezing Yuzuru’s hand with a smile.

Chapter Text

Later that night, Javier woke up, confused about his whereabouts. The chamber felt unfamiliar and forbidding, even though his bed was comfortable and the pillow soft. He felt claustrophobic and decided to slip outside for a walk. He did not meet anyone on the way, but once outside, he found it was raining heavily. Javier greedily inhaled the fresh night air, then hurried back inside. He wondered if the coming of spring ceremony had brought this rain. As he was trying to fall back asleep, fragments of the haunting melody he heard earlier at the Tomb of the Goddess played through his mind. Javier found himself relaxing, as the song eased his passage to a dreamless sleep.

Javier woke up late, as was his custom. It wasn’t raining anymore; bathed in sunlight, his room seemed more welcoming. As he stretched luxuriously in bed, he told himself he could get used to this. Nothing bothered his sleep, and no parents came to tell him to stop lazing around and start the day. Just complete and utter freedom. Then he remembered he was here with a purpose, and he should begin training as soon as possible, if he was going to be of any use to his hosts. The thought made him jump out of bed swiftly, and start dressing. It was not long before there was a tentative knock on his door.

“Yes, who is it?” Javier asked.

“It’s me, Yuzuru”, came the answer, followed by a giggle. “And Pooh-san, too. We come to see Javi. Is Javi awake and ready for the day?”

“Ready!” Javier confirmed cheerfully, even though he was a little disappointed that he wasn’t going to be alone with Yuzuru, like yesterday.

He swung the door open, and only saw Yuzuru standing there.

“Hey! Uh – Where’s your friend? Pooh-san, you said? Sounds like a senpai I must pay respects to!”

As he was still curiously looking around, Javier completely missed Yuzuru holding up a small pouch, out of which peeked the head of a lively, caramel-coloured weasel.

“Meet Pooh-san”, Yuzuru called out, laughing. “Please show him due respect!”

Javier joined in the laughter.

“You got me there. Hello, Pooh-san, aren’t you a cute little guy!” Javier stroked the weasel underneath his chin with a finger.

“I’m happy you like him. I’ve had him since I was eleven. He’s my best friend”, Yuzuru beamed.

“So what are the plans for today? Am I to begin training?”

“Yes, we train”, Yuzuru said. “But first, breakfast.”

The main hall of the palace was filled with whispers – they were discussing yesterday’s events – the arrival of the foreign prince just in time for the spring ceremony, such a timely arrival, and yet not – like squeezing at the last possible moment through a door that was closing.

As if suddenly tiring of either the meal or the conversation, Daisuke, a short but nimble man in his late forties, rose from the table early and went up to the queen’s chambers with a set look on his face.

The guard outside the queen’s bedchamber bowed when he saw him arrive.

“Is the Queen not well? Why is she not up yet?”

“The Queen was up at dawn. She ate early, then went to make arrangements for the training of the foreign prince. Now she is resting and changing clothes. If you could wait-”

“Why should I? It’s nothing I haven’t seen before”, Daisuke spoke brusquely, and went right in before the guard could object, or announce his arrival to the queen.

Shizuka was sitting at her dresser in a camisole, trying on different hair decorations. She startled slightly when Daisuke entered, but then her look of surprise changed to one of boredom.

“Even at a servant’s chamber it is polite to knock”, she observed, but without much heat in her words.

The guard hung back, chagrined, and hurried to say:

“I am sorry, Queen Shizuka, I meant no disrespect, I was about to knock but-”

“It’s fine, Shun. It’s not your fault that Daisuke has no manners.”

The guard bowed, and retreated, closing the door behind him.

“Forgive my lack of manners”, Daisuke said, testily, “but I am angry.”

“What has angered you on this fine day?” Shizuka asked, mildly.

“I went to the citadel gates to see off the people leaving for the fields today. There was a crowd gathered there already, with flower branches and offerings. We waited, and waited… and no one came. Are they late? Or has everyone forgotten this is the date when they set out?”

“They will set out next week. I already sent word to them. We have to train Javier in our ways of fighting the Wyrdexins, so that he can join them. This is the cause of the delay, as you no doubt have guessed”, Shizuka answered, evenly.

“So I was right then – everyone has forgotten this is the date when we set out for the fields, the day after the spring ceremony! Who cares about some foreign prince, whose late arrival was so inopportune! Had he arrived tomorrow, they would have already left without him!”

“But he didn’t. Javier arrived yesterday, just in time for the spring ceremony, and offered his services. Some may consider this a good omen. In any case, it would be foolish not to take advantage of his skills in battle, and even more foolish to risk making an enemy of his father by refusing his help. The king sent one of his own sons in a far-off land to fight a dangerous enemy. We owe him gratitude.”

“He sent one man! What difference can a single man make, strong and skilled though he may be – in an endless battle such as ours?”

“Today he sends a man, another day he may send a hundred. If we offend him with our pride, surely he will send none.”

“But Shizuka, we have our own customs and rules! This is the date we chose a long time ago, and we have always kept to it! Not doing so might be courting disaster!”

“Are you questioning my decisions, Daisuke?” Shizuka said, the timbre of her voice changing abruptly from mild to authoritative.

Daisuke bowed, with a lopsided smile:

“How could I, my queen? Everyone knows you are the mistress here, and your husbands are but your servants.”

Shizuka rolled her eyes at the act.

“Please stop grovelling. It’s unseemly, and unfit for a royal consort.”

Daisuke’s posture snapped upright.

“I do have my pride, you know. Don’t forget my position.”

“Your advice is always welcome, Daisuke”, Shizuka spoke, benevolently. “I have never ignored your words, have I?”

“Only once or twice, maybe”, Daisuke answered, sarcastically. “But this is not about me, it’s about our people. You would trust their safety to a stranger who cannot even wield a spear?”

“Yuzuru will teach this ‘stranger’ well. We will not send Javier into danger unprepared.”

“But who will protect Yuzuru?” Daisuke insisted.

Shizuka lifted an eyebrow.

“Is Yuzuru’s safety such an issue to you, all of a sudden?” she quipped.

“I resent your tone, Shizuka. I always have Yuzuru’s best interests at heart.”

Shizuka hid a smile.

“Of course. Forgive my insinuation. Don’t worry, Yuzuru will be fine even without your protection. Anyway, you are not among the ones selected for the fields this season, so the delay is not something to concern yourself with. Enjoy your respite in the citadel for a while.”

“Shizuka – why not just say it plainly: ‘I trust you even less than I trust the foreigner, unskilled though he may be’. Yes, I know what you’re thinking: you still dwell upon that time long ago when I resented Yuzuru as the son of my rival. But many things have happened since then, both good, and bad, and I have long since made peace with the demons of my youth. Furthermore, with Yuzuru’s father long gone, how can I still resent him as a rival for your affections? The future is in the hands of the young prince, even I recognize this.”

“You still cannot speak Shuzo’s name. The feud between you remains, even if one of you is dead”, Shizuka sighed.

“No”, Daisuke hurried to say. “I did not speak his name out of deference to you – I know you still grieve him. But I see you are stubborn as ever in your convictions. Very well, since I cannot move you as a husband, I will tell you this coldly as an advisor: The time is running out. We cannot afford to be careless. Remember the first time we saw the Wyrdexins – remember the time of year. Remember why the date of the spring ceremony was moved back. This year we are late for the first time in sending our people to the fields, because of this stranger. So this is my advice: Send our best warriors in the fields, tomorrow if not today - even without this Javier, so disaster may be avoided.”

Daisuke bowed again, perfunctorily, and left with resolute steps.

The easy smile on Shizuka’s face faded as Daisuke left. Her brow furrowed in deep thought, revealing that Daisuke’s words hit closer to home than she had allowed him to think.

32 years ago

The skies over Yilia were weeping for several weeks now. People later said this was an omen.

They brought gifts to the goddess – the coming of spring ceremony was still a couple of months away, but they made offerings of what they could, even if the cherry trees were not yet in bloom. Old fruit, leaves and flowers – even last year’s grain, everything bountiful that the goddess cherished – all were left at her tomb. Children were brought to sway her with their laughter, and the newly born with their serious gaze and not-yet-forgotten wisdom. Was the goddess angry with them? Was her sleep restless? The priests had nothing to tell. The stone remained unmoving. The old people who still remembered the goddess’ last awakening, shook their heads and shivered. “It’s better that she does not wake. Anyway, it is not nearly as bad now as it was then. I’ve lived through worse times.” As old people are wont to do, they would reminisce about their youth, when things were somehow both better and worse than the current time.

As the rainy days dragged on, people stopped coming to the goddess. They were just getting drenched with nothing to show for it. The goddess had turned her face from them, it seems. Only Queen Midori would still walk to the tomb of the goddess every day, and remain there for hours in the pouring rain, asking for guidance. Sometimes, she took her daughter along. Sixteen year old Shizuka did not have much patience for sitting still. She would watch her mother sink into deep meditation and stifle her laughter at the sight. With her mother thus distracted, she would chase small animals and insects in the few bushes that were left standing, dripping and cowered under the heavy rain. The rain did not bother Shizuka, and she thought nothing of her clothes being drenched. If it got too much, she would sneeze and shake the droplets off her like a cat, then go on her way. After many hours spent at the tomb, Midori would then take to the streets, asking people news, assessing the state of her troubled kingdom. The people loved her for her open, sensible ways, and her persistence in the face of adversity. They never blamed the queen for their misfortune, as they might have done other rulers. But still, their misfortune was real and could not be ignored. If the rain did not stop soon, surely the food would be scarce that year.

And then, the news came from the fields.

To this day, some people think they came with the rain – and they still fear heavy rain as a herald of Wyrdexins. ‘They’re kindred, like the Wyrdexins and the rain’ became a common saying, which means two things or two people are somehow related or have much in common.

The news of the Wyrdexins was first brought by a white-haired youth. He did not called them Wyrdexins, such a name did not exist yet. Nor had he even seen them. He had woken up in the morning to find his whole family was killed: the remains discarded by the Wyrdexins after they feasted on them were lying in a pool of blood. For some unknown reason, he had been spared. As he ran out of the house, screaming for help, he met other survivors with a similar story. Because he was a fast rider, it was agreed that he would be sent to the palace on horseback, where he finally arrived, half-dead with horror and exhaustion, and his hair turned white overnight. He refused all food and drink offered to him, wanting nothing but to tell his tale in front of the court.

Once the court was summoned, he had this to say:

“A great many people were massacred in a single night by unknown enemies. Their corpses were discovered half-devoured, their entrails hanging out of big gashes in their stomachs. Maybe the dragons have returned and have developed a keen taste for human flesh. We know of no other beasts that can cause such wounds.”

Some people wondered at the fact that beasts with such an appetite would purposefully leave survivors – if they were simply saving fresh meat for later, surely they would have incapacitated them somehow, but they left them unharmed, as if expecting them to run and sound the alarm. It bode ill, suggesting a plan, or a strategy, of drawing even more fresh meat into their clutches.

Midori listened carefully to her advisors, but in the end decided that, be it even a trap, they could not leave the farmers exposed to this danger. So she quickly assembled an army, well-trained soldiers, as well as volunteers, gave them a variety of weapons to deal with whatever monster they found, and sent them to the fields that very same night. With them, she sent an array of healers, as well as mages and priests, to ward off any supernatural threat. Midori also thought the beasts might have some magic of their own. After all, the survivors slept through their family being killed right next to them, an unnaturally deep sleep. There would have been screams, and some resistance. Yet the noise, or the smell of blood, or even the ingrained premonition of any living being that danger is near, did not wake the survivors, who slept like the dead. Surely there was some magic at work there.

Shizuka had argued heatedly with her mother about going with the army, but her mother would have none of it.

“I will not send you, my only child, into unknown danger.”

“Other mothers don’t have that luxury of not sending their children”, Shizuka answered, heatedly. “You are abusing your royal powers!”

“The fate of the kingdom rests on your shoulders”, Midori replied to that.

“It is precisely because of this that I should go!” Shizuka shouted, stomping her foot.

“You are only a child and know little about strategy”, Midori answered patiently, while Shizuka fumed.

“When I have my own child, I will not coddle her!” she argued. “She’ll go first in line to protect her people!”

“Fine”, Midori granted, with a smile. “When you are a queen, you will do as you will. For now, you’ll do as the queen says.”

Shizuka had not been allowed to go, but Daisuke and Shuzo, two of her close companions, though not yet of age, were allowed to join the army as volunteers. They were both skilled with the blade, as well as with the bow and arrow, and they saw this as a golden opportunity to impress the queen’s daughter with their feats of bravery. They thought nothing of the danger that awaited them. Instead, they only felt elated when Shizuka saw them off with sparkling eyes and a tremulous voice, wishing them a safe return.

The army left the citadel at dusk, hoping to reach the fields at the dawn of the fourth day. However, they advanced slowly due to the rain – the horses’ legs were sinking almost knee-deep in the mud. If the journey there was cumbersome, what awaited them once they arrived, was horrific beyond all expectation. The way into the fields was strewn with human remains – the beasts did not feast this time, as much as they carelessly toyed with their victims – so that terror was sown into the heart of the approaching army even before they laid eyes on the creatures that were responsible.

And when they finally did lay eyes on them, many people fainted right away, while the rest of the army, even hardy soldiers, clutched their weapons and did not expect to live another day. But even as they tried to fall into formation and put up some sort of resistance against the beasts that surrounded them, they felt a strange sort of torpor come upon them, as if they were under the influence of a sleep potion or had too much to drink – they could not fight the urge to close their eyes, no matter how hard they tried. Soon they all fell to the ground, in a deep sleep. Their sleep was troubled, as they all had nightmares of the creatures swarming them and devouring them, while they could put up no resistance. All but one. There was a mage with the gift of the third eye who had a different dream, and when they all awoke and listened to his dream, they realized he was describing the will of the beasts. Still in a daze, they got up and moved about, looking for the creatures, but the village seemed to be deserted. There was nothing more for them to do but return to the palace and tell the queen what the creatures desired. Some of the more reckless ones suggested to stay and set fire to the woods – the beasts might lie there in waiting, they might even nest there, and the fire would destroy them for good. The others argued it might merely anger them – they did not know if they were not impervious to fire, and it was not even certain they would be there. They would have to get close to make sure, and then they would be easy prey. Neither of the men and women in that army, after having seen the beasts, had any hope of beating them in combat.

So they hurried back to the palace, their hearts heavy with both shame and fear, and once there, the mage told his dream to Queen Midori:

“We were all forced into a deep sleep, but while the rest all had nightmares of being devoured by the beasts, I alone had a different dream. Forgive me of that which I shall speak, and give no retribution to the messenger, merciful Queen. It seemed that you, my queen, were there in the fields, facing these hellish creatures alone. They were looking at you but not attacking you, as if they were expecting something from you. Then you turned, and behind you I could now see there was a crowd of our people, holding out small children. You picked out fifty children, one by one – some newborn, some as old as four or five, but none older – and then - you threw those to the waiting monsters. Once the number of fifty was reached, the beasts retreated quietly with their prize. Then, you went your separate way, my Queen, leading your people…. This is the dream I had, may I be forgiven for it! It felt so real as if I was indeed witnessing it!” He cried, and beat his chest, in as much distress as the people who had dreamed, just as vividly, that they were being devoured.

Hearing this, Midori sank into thought, her countenance twisted in distress.

For a long while, no one spoke, until the queen’s most trusted advisor finally broke the silence.

“The message seems clear”, he spoke sadly. “We must pay these dangerous creatures a tribute of children if we are to survive. It is like other people suffered with the dragons, or the minotaurs. It seems that it is now the turn of the Yilians too, to suffer such tribulations.”

“How can you be so calm, old man??” another advisor rebuked him. “These are our children you’re talking about!”

“I am calm precisely because I am old, and I have seen and read things your green mind does not conceive of”, the white-bearded advisor scolded him. “Crying will not help us. We must weigh the matter carefully.”

But at the end of a long day in which everyone argued heatedly and racked their brains for a solution, they could see no other alternative, but to give in to the demands of the beasts – conveyed to them so strangely.

The next day, Midori, looking like she had aged a decade overnight, told the people her royal decree. They would pay tribute to the creatures henceforth known as Wyrdexins – a poisonous name aptly chosen by the scholars for the deadly, hideous creatures that they were. In the meantime, the queen vowed, they would seek to learn more about them, in order to destroy them or drive them back into whatever hellhole they had crawled out of.

“Giving away your children is a harsh sacrifice to make, but no other way could be found, and it is only a temporary measure”, the queen sought to reassure the people.

They rose their voices in anger – especially those who did not see the Wyrdexins face to face – and made a clamour, and even sought to revolt. But in the end, they bowed their heads, and accepted the grim sentence, as they too, could see no other way out.

The tribute-giving was set to happen on the day of the spring ceremony. The heavy rain had stopped by then, but no one noticed when, and no one seemed to care. Their earlier misfortune seemed nothing compared to this new tragedy. Some hoped the chosen date would anger the goddess enough to wake her up, so she would take care of the Wyrdexins for them; still others hoped she wouldn’t wake, because then more of them would die, not only the fifty tributes. But the goddess did not wake, and the Wyrdexins, waiting patiently in the fields, got their due. Then the procession led by Queen Midori travelled back, and the Wyrdexins carried off the children to devour them in peace in some far-off nest. It all happened like in the dream of the mage.

Such tribute was paid to the Wyrdexins for sixteen torturous years. At some point, the people resisted the decision to give up their children in the only way that they could: by not having any more children. As it became increasingly more difficult to find tributes, a second date was established later in the year, in the hope that more children would be born in the meantime, in an attempt to reach the required number of fifty. Soon, the tribute was regularly being paid twice a year, the first time the day of the spring ceremony, and the second, at the advent of the cold season.

Even in such troubled times, life went on, and Daisuke and Shuzo continued to fight for Shizuka’s favour. Shizuka preferred Shuzo, who was was both intelligent, and kind. The two of them could talk for hours and not get bored with each other. Still she couldn’t help sometimes but reluctantly admire Daisuke’s shrewd cleverness, and his sarcastic jokes made her laugh. Mostly she just wanted all three of them to get along and hang out together like they did when they were children. So, when she reached marrying age, and ascended to the throne, she brought back the old custom of the queen taking as many husbands as she wanted. Now she could marry both Shuzo and Daisuke, and hopefully rekindle their long-gone friendship. However, that did not happen - the two of them remained rivals, and as good as enemies, up until Shuzo’s untimely death.

Even when she took several husbands, Shizuka tried all the witches’ remedies to ensure she would not become pregnant. Yet one day, she came down into the main hall with a drawn pale face, and her hands shaking. She said that fate – that could not be denied, has caught up with her. She would say no more, and went about with a stony face, so they all feared she was ill or dying. But instead, they saw her belly growing from one month to the next, and realized then the meaning of her words. She was pregnant. The advisors told her to hide the child, because a royal child surely cannot be made tribute – the royal line dying out spells the doom of a kingdom as surely as a Wyrdexin attack. But Shizuka did not want to hide her child. “No daughter of mine will grow up sickly and unhappy, locked in a tower”, she firmly stated. But she also said she will never give up her child as tribute.

“I once accused my mother of abusing her powers when she did not allow me to go off into danger”, Shizuka said. “I swore I would not do the same with my own child. Now I see that I cannot keep my word.”

Shizuka was sure she would give birth to a daughter, but when a son was born, she loved him just the same. She spent most of her time with Yuzuru and his father, Shuzo, in her private chambers, and many resented her for it, and for the happiness that could not be had by others.

16 years ago

The tributes had been scarce for years now, less than the fifty that were initially pledged, and the Wyrdexins were growing displeased. They had started to attack farmers in the fields at random, and while people tried to ignore such cases as isolated incidents, they all realized that the fragile peace was coming to an end. Things were tethering on the brink, ready for a collapse.

The time for the second tribute of the year was drawing near, with the first not reaching even a quarter of the promised quota. The royal council was called in a meeting to discuss how to deal with the situation.

It could not be ignored any longer that Yuzuru had just turned five earlier that month. For the likes of him, and Keiji, the time was almost up. Keiji was the son of a renowned healer. Shizuka had promised his mother on her deathbed that she would protect her child like her own. Keiji was raised at the palace, and, being Yuzuru’s age, often joined him in games. Satoko and Kaori were three and two years old, the daughters of a royal advisor, who sat in a corner now, white as a sheet, waiting for what he knew would be the doom of his children. Aside from them, the guards had managed to find only three other newborn children in the entire kingdom. The guards were now awkwardly holding them in their arms, as they sat in the back of the room, awaiting the court’s decision.

“This cannot go on”, Shizuka said, firmly. “We must put an end to this now!”

Daisuke jumped from his seat.

“Now?! Now that your own child is in danger, you mean!” he shouted. “This is the first time I’ve heard you speak like this! Not when other mothers cried and beat their breasts!”

He looked around for support, but everyone in the council room averted their eyes. Shizuka ignored the outburst like it was nothing, and went on:

“This cannot go on, because so few children are being born, and those few are sacrificed before they could even speak. Soon there would be no more young people – only old people withering away.”

“That is correct”, an advisor nodded. “We are in grave danger of dying out as a people.”

“The people had made their choice”, the old advisor spoke, the same one who had spoken of ancient sacrifices in Midori’s court. “They cannot openly go against your decision to give their children as tribute, but they can oppose your decision by refusing to have anymore children for you to give.”

“This isn’t helping”, Shizuka said, exasperated. “I cannot order them to have children. And I know very well how they feel.” Her voice broke. “I have not asked for this.”

She stopped talking, and sobbed. For a few seconds, she looked like a little girl, scraping her knees on trees to tall for her to climb. The others waited, respectfully avoiding to glance her way, or watching her openly with sympathy.

Daisuke shook his head disapprovingly, but said nothing. Shizuka breathed out, and slowly composed herself.

“I have not asked for this”, she repeated, her voice steadier now, “but it is my lot to decide. But before I do, I must ask of you – in all these years since the Wyrdexins started to plague us, have we learned anything about them that might give us an edge, that would help us defeat them?”

The answers varied. Some argued that they now knew more than they did at first (which was true), successful kills were made, and even though difficult, it was possible to put up a defence. Others argued that while Wyrdexins could be killed indeed, it was a laborious process, and much bravery and skill was needed; furthermore, if many swarmed at once, it was entirely impossible. Shizuka listened to them all and nodded, asking for details and clarification, until she stripped the personal opinions from bare facts. Then she realized why people were so divided. It was no more than a fifty/fifty chance – there was no right or wrong decision, just the hand of fate, and the will of the goddess. Yet she, as the queen, had to decide, as her mother once did.

She thanked her advisors, then retreated. The second day, she summoned her people. Everyone that was not bed-ridden or otherwise unable to make the journey, was ordered to come to the royal palace, and there in the courtyard, on the stone steps, Shizuka spoke to them, so they all heard her.

“I will not make the same mistake as my mother and not listen to my people, before I decide their fate. She was a good ruler, but perhaps this was not wise of her. We all now suffer the consequences of her decision.”

“Some more than others!” came a bold shout from the crowd.

Shizuka did not pretend she did not hear it. She nodded.

“You are right to be displeased. So I seek now to make things right, and give you a voice where then you had none. Tell me your decision, and I will follow it. Do you think I should pay the remaining children as tribute? Or should we put together a strong army and try to stand up to the Wyrdexins, face the grave threat head-on, and thus earn our freedom?”

As expected, a great uproar arose. Everyone was arguing.

“Face the Wyrdexins as men and women, and stop sending children to their deaths!” came a shout.

“Fight the Wyrdexins! Fight them!” others shouted in agreement.

“The Wyrdexins will kill us all!” “Give up the children!” “Give up your son!” still others yelled.

Mothers and fathers stared scornfully at Shizuka and screamed in her face: “Give up your son!”

The courtiers were staring from their windows of the royal palace, frightened by the noise, wondering how the queen can make out anything in this din. Shizuka waited to see which way the crowd would sway. And then, slowly but surely, the crowd gained one voice. Even those who had taken up the war cry against the Wyrdexins, now joined in the cry of “Give up your son!” The single cry rose and became thunderous. Shizuka trembled on the stairs, and finally, took a step back, overwhelmed. She had asked for the crowd’s decision, and the crowd decided. Was it that they hated her that much? Or was it actually their grief and fear bursting forth, hoping to right some divine injustice that neither of them were responsible for?

Still – the crowd had spoken, and it was plain to hear:

“Give up your son!”

Shizuka wondered if Yuzuru could hear it from his room. She wondered if he knew what it meant. But there was no turning back now. She raised her head proudly, even though her heart beat small and frightened in her chest.

“I have heard your will. I will do as you ask. My son, and the other children, will be given as tribute.”

She waved them off with a hand, a royal gesture of dismissal:

“You may leave now.”

Once up in her chambers, her courage left her, and she dissolved into bitter tears. Yuzuru climbed into her lap, and told her:

“Don’t be sad, mom.”

Shuzo embraced them both and said:

“I will not allow this to happen.”

At the time, Shizuka thought they were just words. Even though she knew that, she allowed the words to comfort her.

On the day that Yuzuru had to be taken away, Shizuka’s strength failed her. The night before, she fell prey to a fever which made her rant and rave in her agony, and could not stand up from her bed to see him off. Yuzuru was taken from her arms too weak to hold on to him, and carried off by a guard. Shuzo remained behind, grasping at her sweaty hand, lost in thought. His face was set and he did not cry.

“It has come to it”, he murmured. “Yes, it has come to it.” Then he stood up and left the room.

Yuzuru did not cry either. His hands were clutched into little fists and his face was pale, eyes darting about wildly, but he did not cry. He had told his mother he would be strong, and he wanted to keep that promise. He would not disappoint her. But when he was placed into the carriage along with the other children, he clutched tightly at their hands and held on, his lower lip trembling. Outside, a great crowd was gathered to watch, but the mood was very different from the time when Shizuka called them for guidance. Even the people who had clamoured the loudest for Yuzuru to be given as tribute, were now crying and beating their chests in anguish.

“It’s the end of the royal line!” they cried. “We’re doomed! No children are born to us anymore! We’re a dying breed!”

There was such anguish and pain as the citadel rarely knew of, even in the clutches of war. Some ran to the tomb of the goddess and beat their fists against the stone, urging her to wake – urging her to take their lives instead. But the goddess did not wake.

As Yururu and the rest of the children were carried away to the fields, Shuzo returned to Shizuka’s chamber, dressed for the road, weapons at his belt. He took Shizuka’s hand in his almost solemnly.

“I came to say goodbye. I’m sorry that you’re like this. Although maybe it’s better. I wouldn’t be able to say goodbye otherwise. Goodbye, my love”, then he kissed Shizuka on her forehead, even though she took no note of it, she was lost to her own demons. “I don’t believe I shall return. But Yuzuru will live – I promise you that.”

Shizuka heard him as if in a dream, and when he let go of her head and left, she started crying, a plaintive, keening sound. She cried like that all all day, and those around the palace who heard her felt shivers down their back at the sound – some said it was like a dog’s wailing that portents death. It was not until the next day that news came of what had happened.

Shuzo had led a group of well-trained warriors who had been preparing for this day, beyond the fields, giving chase to the Wyrdexins that carried away the children. They were joined by a great many people from the citadel, as well as farmers, some armed with nothing but pitchforks. No one had asked them to come, they simply joined the soldiers, because they thought all hope for the future was lost, and this was was all they had left to fight for. Some trembled and died when faced with the beasts even before they could deal a single blow. Others even managed a kill, with beginner’s luck and driven by a berserker’s rage. In the end, all of them were massacred. But the Wyrdexins now also knew fear – they had not seen such resistance in a while – and such numbers. So they retreated – they let go of the tributes not yet devoured, and slunk off like animals that were dealt an unexpected blow. Although Shuzo did not survive, as he fought as one who does not value his life, out of Shuzo’s soldiers, a great many lived. They returned victorious to the citadel, carrying the children they managed to rescue, where they were welcomed with cries of wild joy, and flowers thrown at their feet.

Shizuka ran from the palace in her nightgown, hair flying wild, and face crumpled from crying, to embrace Yuzuru, her tears of despair now turning to tears of joy and sorrow. Because she knew even before they told her, she would not see Shuzo again.

A period of tentative hope began, even clouded by uncertainty. Freed from the weight of tribute-giving, the people now multiplied freely, as if making up for lost time. The queen ordered the citadel reinforced and equipped with additional protection against the Wyrdexins. She then ordered and supervised the training of a strong army to keep the creatures at bay for good and protect the people in the fields. Shuzo’s soldiers proved valuable assets, as they had first-hand information in fighting the beasts, and had lived to tell the tale. They had a small window of respite while the cold season lasted, because the Wyrdexins were put-off by the cold. Some even said they hibernated.

But they had less time than they thought – the coming of spring ceremony was still more than a month away and news came that the Wyrdexins had started slaughtering animals and people in the fields. Shizuka made haste to send the army to protect them. But this time, the Wyrdexins were ready. They no longer tried to challenge the warriors in open fight, instead they retreated into their shells when they were overwhelmed, and waited until the danger was passed. Then they would seek out the weak to feast on them unperturbed. As for the warriors – they only engaged in fights when they had strength in numbers, and if they left a few alive, it was just to scar them with frightful memories.

Soon, a messenger was sent to the palace to convey the news of their failure. It was then that the queen decided that everyone able to carry a weapon, young or old, would be trained to fight the Wyrdexins. That winter, the farmers and their households were summoned to the citadel, and the training began in earnest. The next year, the coming of spring ceremony was pushed back a month so that the people could still attend it if they wished to, before they left for the fields. It remained this way, although few of them chose to attend it anymore. The goddess had not lived up to her name, she did not help them when their need was dire. They could only help themselves, and they were more reassured by having a weapon in their hand, sharp metal gleaming at its tip, than by a thousand-year-old tombstone, sacred though it may be.

Present Day

“We’ll be using my spear, Axel, until yours is ready”, Yuzuru said, handing it over to Javier with a small bow. “It’s called a snake tongue spear.” He ran his fingers lightly over the tip which indeed resembled a snake’s forked tongue. “You see? This forked part can easily pierce through the flesh. Also, the points of this fork are spaced at eye-width apart so you can put out both the creature’s eyes with one hit - provided you are fast and precise enough, of course. Blinding a Wyrdexin is very useful in combat, because it momentarily stuns it, giving you a big advantage”, Yuzuru explained.

Javier nodded, to show he was following.

“The curves of this blade – see here -” Yuzuru pointed further down, where the blade coiled like the body of a snake, “are very effective for slicing. They cause thrusting wounds that make the creature lose a lot of blood very fast. We usually use them on the creatures’ limbs. More on that later. So far, all you need to know is that the spear needs to be thrown from five to six feet away, with speed and precision.”

Javier smiled.

“That is easy enough to say.” He weighed the weapon in his hand. “It weighs much less than I would’ve thought,” he said with surprise.

“Its weight is less than that of the heavy spear that is more common in your part of the world”, Yuzuru nodded, “so it can be thrown further, and wielded more easily. This also helps you to be lighter and faster in combat – which is crucial when fighting a Wyrdexin. I will show you now step by step how to wield it – you will see it is not complicated. A fight with the dagger requires just as much precision and speed, and also good footwork. Here too, you must be light on your feet. Knowing your talent in wielding Salchow, you should master Axel quite soon.”

“Thank you for the vote of confidence”, Javier grinned. “When will my own be ready?”

“The swordsmiths are working on it. I think tomorrow you will have it.”

“Great. I must think of a good name for it.”

“Now”, Yuzuru said, taking back Axel. “When throwing a spear, having a good body position is key. Watch me.”

Javier sat down a few paces off, and watched Yuzuru carefully.

“Just like in archery, finding your balance, your inner core, is significant. I do it like this.” Yuzuru traced a straight line with his fingers from one shoulder to another, and then from his throat straight down to his stomach. “This move helps me find my inner axis. Now, you balance the spear over your shoulder at eye level, while you aim – like this. Now, for the placement of your legs. You are right handed, like me, so the left foot must be positioned towards the target, your feet apart and your knees bent slightly….”

Javier was duly noting everything Yuzuru was saying, and showing him, but a corner of his mind was wandering, finding appreciation in Yuzuru’s effortless grace, as well as in his physical qualities – an appreciation which had nothing to do with Yuzuru’s ability to wield a spear. Yuzuru was slender, with broad shoulders, a narrow waist, round hips, and a shapely backside. His limbs were tightly muscled and agile, while his hands and feet were strong yet dainty. They suited his regular facial features, almost too soft for a man. He was a study in contradictions which fascinated Javier. It seemed that nature decided to bestow upon him features considered attractive for both genders, or maybe this perfect figure was something he had trained himself, to better aid him in combat. Either way, his androgynous look was greatly appealing to Javier, who found both men and women attractive. Javier wondered, not for the first time, about Yuzuru’s own preferences in this area.

“As you throw, it would be good if you twist your body slightly sideways….”, Yuzuru demonstrated, before Javier’s train of thoughts could be hopelessly derailed. “And – throw!”

Yuzuru threw the spear. It made a wide arch and landed precisely on the pillar of a banner some feet away – just short of the waving flag.

Javier cheered: “Very nice!”

Yuzuru acknowledged the compliment only with a short bow, but Javier could tell he was very happy to be praised. He resolved to praise him at every possible opportunity.

Yuzuru went to retrieve the spear, then asked:

“Any questions?”

“Will you show me again?” Javier asked immediately.

Yuzuru laughed.

“Alright. I will show you one more time slowly, and then I will show you how I throw in real time. Then it’s your turn - I will guide you, and correct your posture if necessary.”

Javier brightened up at that – correcting his posture meant there might be some touching involved. However, he pretended to be reluctant, and he said:

“If you show me how you do it in real time, you’ll really cower me. I won’t dare show my rookie moves as a beginner.”

Javier was merely teasing, but Yuzuru replied, seriously:

“How else will you learn? We will do it like this. I promise I won’t laugh when your spear lands half a foot away”, he added cheekily, and Javier realized Yuzuru was also playing with him.

Javier threw his head back and laughed, delighted.

They took a break when the sun was midway over the citadel, to have a bite to eat, and discuss their progress. Pooh-san was nosing around, sniffing the ground for frogs, which could be seen hopping here and there in the puddles left by last night’s rain.

The battlements appeared to be a popular spot for taking lunch, as other people were already there, or making their way there, chatting and eating; however they kept at a respectful distance, bowing at Yuzuru and looking curiously at Javier.

Javier’s face was gleaming with exertion and his muscles already twinged pleasantly. The new craft was challenging but pleasant to engage in – Javier loved learning new skills, and he put all his effort and ability into it, partly because he had someone he wanted to impress. He was gratified when Yuzuru told him, enthusiastically:

“You are learning very fast! I knew you would! I can’t wait to tell the court about it. You will be fully ready when we set out for the fields next week!”

Keiji heard them from nearby, and said cryptically:

“Might even have to be sooner, if rumours I heard are true.”

Yuzuru turned to him, alarmed:

“Did anything happen in the fields?”

“In the fields, no. At least if it did, no news has come of it yet. But in the palace there was an argument, about sending you to the fields sooner.”

Yuzuru frowned.

“What the queen decides, we will of course, obey. But she knows that at least a week is needed, even for a warrior like Javier, to master this skill. I have said as much to her, and she agreed.”

Keiji shrugged.

“I have heard that others disagree. But hey – don’t kill the messenger.”

Grimacing, he moved a few paces away, as if to say ‘Forget I said anything’.

“What’s this about?” Javier dared to ask Yuzuru, in a low voice. “It sounds like I’m interfering with your schedule.”

Yuzuru huffed and rolled his eyes.

“Pay no mind. Keiji is probably just envious I’m spending so much time with you. There are so few of us of our age left – in fact it’s just Keiji, Kaori, Satoko, and me. It’s… lonely”, Yuzuru admitted.

Javier grasped Yuzuru’s hand in comfort, but then he remembered Keiji.

“I feel sorry for him, too”, he said, honestly. “But still, there’s no smoke without fire. He must have meant something by what he said – a disagreement at court?”

“Well”, Yuzuru answered reluctantly, “in the previous years, we left for the fields today. But it’s not like the fields and animals are left undefended. There are some people there keeping guard during the cold season too. It’s not needed to send many during the cold season, because there are fewer Wyrdexins to deal with in winter, and they are usually sluggish and easier to kill.”

“It’s been fairly warm these days, though”, Javier said anxiously. “If only I arrived sooner...”

“Don’t worry yourself, Javi. You arrived just fine. The queen and I agree. Don’t let others tell you differently.”

Yuzuru patted Javier’s thigh, then as if realizing what he was doing, he retreated his hand abruptly. Javier hid a smile.

“So the Wyrdexins may be fearsome”, Javier began lightly, “but they don’t like the cold and probably hibernate, like bears or squirrels. It’s reassuring that even such deadly creatures have something in common with squirrels.”

“We don’t know how much they hibernate, if at all”, Yuzuru answered in his usual thoughtful manner. “We haven’t found their nests yet. But don’t be fooled that they are like regular beasts. They have magic, too – an unknown but powerful sort of magic. They can cloud your judgement, so you can’t see them until it’s too late, and they can make you sink into a heavy sleep that leaves you vulnerable. They can even influence our minds by sending us dreams, and hallucinations.”

Javier shuddered, even under the warmth of the sun above.

“The first time I saw them as a child…”, Yuzuru began, then shook his head. “No, I can’t talk about it”, he decided. “But I can tell you that when I was rescued, I was half unconscious in a deep fever – I was sick for months. Keiji too. People thought it was from something the Wyrdexins gave us, a potion or a poison.”

“Why would they poison you if they wanted to eat you?”

“I don’t think it was poison, either. You are right, they wouldn’t want to poison their meat, and there was no use trying to influence our minds, as we were already in their clutches. I think the fever was just a reaction of the body, to being very repulsed, and afraid.” Yuzuru accompanied his words with a small, embarrassed smile.

“You were a child”, Javier said. “A grown man would have been afraid to die so horribly. There’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

“I’m not ashamed. I’m just unsettled by not being able to predict my reactions. Does that make sense? I’m afraid that when the time comes to be most brave, that’s when I’ll prove a coward.”

It was a very honest statement, and one that implicitly placed such trust in the listener, that Javier felt momentarily at a loss on how to answer.

“I don’t think anyone can blame you for that”, he finally settled on telling Yuzuru, softly.

Yuzuru looked away and grimaced, closing his eyes tightly, as if trying to master his emotions.

“You place too big a burden on yourself”, Javier realized.

“I am the queen’s only child. She wished for a daughter, but only got me”, Yuzuru said. “If I can’t protect my people, then who will be the one to do it?”

Javier suddenly remembered the words of his father back when he was a child, as they were hiding in a cave under a rock: Soon you will be a king, with your own people to look out for. If you’re scared, where does that leave them? His father’s words at that time had brought back some measure of courage to his frightened heart. He smiled, thinking that Yuzuru had a similar way of steeling himself. So Javier answered:

“You are right. We have a duty to the people. And we will not let them down. They will never say of us ‘They ran away when the danger got too much.’ - but rather ‘They did their best, and died bravely, when they could do no more.’”

Yuzuru nodded in excitement at his words.

“Do you want to hear something strange, Javi? I think some amount of danger can make you an even better fighter. It sounds silly, I know. But sometimes when I fight, I feel like I can see better, and hear better, my senses are sharpened. I’m faster, and stronger, even more cunning.”

“Yes”, Javier nodded. “I’ve noticed the same with me. Some unknown magic happens when your heart is into the fight. I know of folk who could lift ten times their body weight when under mortal threat, if need pressed them.”

“That’s why I think, there’s still hope.”

Keiji had again shifted closer to where they sat in the meantime, and now they could hear him scoff under his breath.

“Keiji, everything alright?” Yuzuru called out.

“Nah, all good!” Keiji returned, with a smile that looked obviously put on.

Javier wondered if Yuzuru would tell him off, but Keiji was faster:

“Have a good training, guys! I must return to my post!”

Yuzuru merely nodded, and Keiji went on his way.

“Keiji is pessimistic”, Yuzuru explained to Javier. “You must not think badly of him.”

“I don’t”, Javier hurried to say. “I just think he was a little rude to you.”

“Ah, we go back a long way. There’s no bad blood between us, no matter how Keiji acts. And some part of me understands him.”

“I for one try to send gloomy thoughts as far away from me as I can, as soon as they arrive”, Javier said. “It’s no use dwelling on them.”

Yuzuru was silent.

“Do you agree?” Javier prodded him.

“Sometimes I get gloomy thoughts too”, Yuzuru admitted. “I know they do more harm than good but… It’s just that, realistically, it’s hard not feel discouraged. For all the time that’s passed, for all the lives that were lost… and still we know so little about these creatures – we don’t even know where they come from, and where their nests are – it’s not enough, not enough-”

Javier watched Yuzuru’s fingers clench on the spear as he stared unseeingly into the distance.

“Hey”, Javier said, placing a hand on Yuzuru’s shoulder. He realized the simple gesture failed to convey how much he wanted to comfort and reassure Yuzuru in that moment. Moreover, he wanted Yuzuru to look at him, pay attention to him, instead of getting lost to whatever demons ran rampant in his mind. Javier cupped Yuzuru’s face in the palm of his hand, and turned it gently towards him. Yuzuru’s dark eyes settled on Javier, but his angry gaze seemed still lost within.

“You may think it’s not enough, but it’s more than you knew in the beginning, right?” Javier said, encouragingly. He caressed Yuzuru’s jaw, feeling the smoothness of the skin underneath his fingers. “So that’s progress, right?”

Yuzuru’s gaze lost some of its angry intensity, as it focused on Javier. He sighed in agreement, seemingly content to let Javier hold him like this. As the moment lengthened, Javier’s eyes were drawn to Yuzuru’s heart-shaped lips – so close to touch - the heavier lower lip pouting slightly. Never one to miss an opportunity, Javier angled his head with obvious intent, but at that moment Yuzuru stood up abruptly, clearing his throat, and looking around.

“We should resume training”, he said firmly, though regretfully. “There’s little time, and you must practice a lot, even after you acquire the skill.”

Javier did not allow any disappointment to show on his face:

“Alright! Lead the way”, he said, brightly.

Yuzuru caught his fingers and squeezed them with a smile, as if in silent apology, and Javier felt reassured, despite the rejection. Yuzuru was right, now was not the time for such things. But he could still hope.

Chapter Text

Two days later, Javier was in the courtyard, practising his throw, under Yuzuru’s watchful eye. He could now easily hit an unmoving target from four feet away. After five such successful throws in a row, Yuzuru cheered and launched himself into Javier’s arms for a celebratory hug. Javier dropped the spear and caught him, lifting him off the ground with one arm, while punching the air in triumph with the other – overjoyed with his success, but no less so with the prize he now held tightly – his loud cheer echoing through the silent courtyard.

Suddenly remembering that people might be staring at their overt displays of affection – something Yuzuru was uncomfortable with in the past – Javier let go of Yuzuru and looked around sheepishly. But aside from Keiji standing at the palace gates, a familiar figure by now to Javier, the courtyard was empty.

“Where is everyone?” Javier asked, confused. “This place was full of people yesterday at around this time.”

“They were sent to the fields this morning”, Yuzuru answered. “We will follow them in three days’ time, to give you more time to practice. By the way, I was going to tell you”, he added with a grimace, “we are to have the swearing ceremony tomorrow at dawn.”

Javier’s eyes widened as he took in all this information. He had many questions, but he settled on the most pressing one:

“At dawn?” he repeated. “So I have to get up….”

“Much earlier than usual, yes”, Yuzuru laughed. “I’ll come to your room when the moon sets. We’ll have to go down to the river.”

“What is this ceremony? Do I need to be prepared in any special way for this? Will it be…”

“Just don’t eat or drink anything after midnight. Our first meal of the day must be shared as part of the ceremony. And you will need to repeat a few lines as the mage tells you. It’s an old custom”, Yuzuru explained, almost apologetically.

“I won’t have to sell my soul, right?” Javier joked, only to have Yuzuru return his look, seriously.

“Sell? No. You will bind your soul to mine, so that we will never forsake each other when in danger. That’s why it’s also called the soul-binding ceremony. This makes us twins in battle, looking out for each other. And if any harm comes to either of us, the other will avenge it as if it were his own.”

Javier swallowed, his throat going dry.

“I would have done all this anyway”, he declared, holding Yuzuru’s gaze.

“I know”, Yuzuru answered. “And so would I. But the court decided we must swear.”

In fact, it had been Daisuke’s doing. When Shizuka announced her decision of sending the previously appointed group in the fields, with Yuzuru and Javier following some days later, Daisuke nodded like he expected no less. Then he said, gravely:

“The queen decided wisely. However, the delay in itself may bring about bad luck. Let us hope Yuzuru will not meet any danger on the road, when he sets out later alone.”

Shizuka narrowed her eyes. Knowing Daisuke was baiting her to argue, she spoke firmly:

“Javier will accompany Yuzuru, so he will not be alone; and in any case I fully trust my son to take care of himself.”

Shizuka’s tone implied the conversation was finished, but Daisuke did not back down:

“Even so, two people alone on such a journey may yet encounter danger, and with no one else around it is easy for one to run and forsake the other. To ensure against that happening, let Javier take the soul-binding oath.”

“The soul-binding oath? The ancient swearing ceremony?”

The advisors looked from one to the other, bewildered.

“No one’s taken that in centuries.”

“A stranger, barely arrived to our lands, would never agree to such an oath.”

“Yuzuru would need to take it as well, it goes both ways.”

“It is an insurance which is good to have, surely”, Daisuke answered, shrugging. “But if the queen decides it is not needed…”

“I don’t see the harm in it”, Shizuka interrupted. “And I don’t think that someone honest and brave like Javier would refuse it. The oath reaffirms what he must do as a good soldier anyway – never fail his companions, protect them with his life, avenge them if he can’t protect them. Let Yuzuru and Javier swear that to each other.”

“But whenever this oath was taken in the past, if records speak true”, an old mage dared to mention, “it was by a group of people – an army that rode into a dangerous battle, or a team of people facing a great challenge together. The sacred power contained within the oath would thus be scattered among many people, each receiving a small portion of the benefit, and of the responsibility that came with it. And when the unit broke, the oath also ceased its effect.”

“That’s right”, another mage chimed in. “No records exist of only two people taking this oath. It would mean that each would get to carry the full weight of its magic, for better, or for worse. The two people would become intrinsically linked, an intimate connection that would last more than the length of a journey undertaken together; it might even last their entire lives.”

“What do you mean, ‘might’?” Daisuke scoffed. “Have you no hard certainty, mage, if it will, or it won’t?”

“With your forgiveness, we cannot be sure. We are dealing with powerful magic that has not been used in our lifetime, and we have no previous history of such cases to draw wisdom from.”

Daisuke scoffed.

“You can’t be any good then, if-”

“Silence!” Shizuka interrupted. “I stand by my decision. Yuzuru and Javier will take this oath. Whatever this will lead to, is already written in the book of fate.”

Yuzuru went to Javier as promised, when it was still dark, holding a candle. A bleary eyed, still sleepy Javier opened the door, greeting him with a grunt. Soon, they were making their way down the citadel roads, towards the heavy gate that Javier had found so forbidding when he first arrived. He smiled at the memory. So much had happened since then; the citadel had become to him a dear place, in no small measure because of Yuzuru. They slipped outside the city and then down a path towards the river. It was close by; its rippling could already be heard. Soon, Javier began to hear other steps behind them, some overtaking them – several people were hurrying to attend the swearing ceremony, it seemed. The dark gave way a little, the dawn was not far off. Yuzuru was quiet; only at some point he showed Javier what was in the bundle he carried: rice bread wrapped in a cloth that they would share as their first meal of the day.

As they reached the river, Javier glimpsed several faces in the near-darkness staring at him expectantly. He was used to being stared at, more or less openly, in the citadel, so he remained unconcerned, and merely bowed in greeting. An elderly man wearing the garment of a mage, and carrying an old book, stepped forward.

“Javier and Yuzuru”, he said, gravely, as he bowed. “Please approach.”

Javier stepped towards him, but the mage directed him towards the river. Javier went to stand on the bank of the river, followed by Yuzuru. The mage remained further behind, only a little ahead of the watching crowd. Javier looked down at the river, and glimpsed fishes and small frogs beginning to stir in the clear water. The leaves of the trees rustled in the wind. A reddish glow appeared in the sky, and reflected in the waters, heralding the new day. They were on time.

“First”, the mage spoke, “you must give each other something that you cherish, or something that you have held on to for long.”

This was a variation from the original ritual which dictated that the members of the group were each to part with something they held dear. Usually the objects were gathered in a pile and burned, to ensure they would not be retrieved later. But this time, since just two would be sworn in, the mage decided this waste was no longer necessary - they could just give up their valuable objects to each other. It would strengthen their bond, and they would be unlikely to ask for them back.

Without any hesitation, Yuzuru undid one of his necklaces, and clasped it around Javier’s own neck. His features, lit up from behind by the rising sun, were bathed in a warm, golden light. Javier pondered for a while what to give Yuzuru, not because he did not want to part with anything, but because he did not know whether anything he carried could be considered valuable enough. Then suddenly, he remembered something, and reached into his shirt – into yet another secret pocket sown safely to protect its contents. Javier tore at the fabric in his haste, and took out a silver brooch encrusted with small gems, in the shape of a swan. He hurriedly placed it in Yuzuru’s hand, and closed his palm over it. Yuzuru looked at Javier questioningly, and then opened his palm, eyes going wide as he took in the exquisite craftsmanship of the jewel. Javier merely nodded at him and smiled. There was no time now for questions and explanations, so Yuzuru nodded and smiled in return, then signalled to the mage that they were ready with the gift-giving.

“Stand facing each other”, the mage instructed. “Closer. Now hold each other’s hands. Look each other in the eye, and repeat after me.”

Javier was so close he could count the tiny moles on Yuzuru’s face and gaze at the edge of his eyelids, naturally sharpened as if by kohl. He refocused with an effort, and found that Yuzuru was gazing at him with a similar fascination, his breath slightly laboured.

The mage began to speak, slowly and clearly, and Javier and Yuzuru repeated the words, trying to will their voices not to tremble:

“Your life shall be as dear to me as my own life; you shall be like the flesh of my flesh and blood of my blood. We shall be like the limbs of one body, as if we share one breath of life. We shall protect and stand for each other such as the spear arm and the shield arm. A danger that you’re in is a danger I will run into, and never flee from. If you come to grievous harm, I will seek to avenge you even onto death. If ever I forswear this, or deny you, may these same words that lend me strength today, strike me down swiftly. So witness the River below, and the Citadel above, and between us the Dawn of the new day that rises.”

The mage then turned to those in attendance, signalling it was their turn to speak:

“So witness we the People,” they repeated after the mage, in one voice.

In the silence that reigned afterwards, Javier felt Yuzuru’s hands tremble in his own, and realized that he, too, was shaking slightly. It was a strong, heavy oath, the words lingering in the air around them like living spells, and the ancient, unknown magic they carried was not only potent, but oppressive, weighing them down like an impenetrable shield that was too heavy to carry. Javier did not fear the possibility of failing his oath on purpose, but rather that the intricate game of life might lead them unknowingly to some sort of failure, which would bring about not only his doom, but also Yuzuru’s. Either way, the ceremony was done now, and their souls were bound. He had felt an immediate connection with Yuzuru from the start, but now it was as if that bond cemented into something more definitive, more powerful. He felt like he might never let go of Yuzuru, never let him out of his sight.

“You may share the first meal”, the mage said, finally. “It is done.” He sounded relieved.

Yuzuru took out the rice bread, and broke it in two, giving one piece to Javier. They sat down, and ate at leisure. One by one, the witnesses left silently, along with the mage.

After they were alone, Javier told Yuzuru about the brooch.

“It belonged to my mother. She had an illness that no healer managed to cure, a wasting sickness. She passed away when I was twelve. She was a great lover of beautiful things and had many precious jewellery and clothes. I have two brothers and two sisters, and we each got something of hers – my sisters got the most of her stuff, but my mother wanted all of us to have something she had treasured in life, so that in some way, she could be with us always. She chose this brooch to give to me, and I’ve kept it with me since.”

“I thought it looked lovely and valuable,” Yuzuru said, touching it softly in wonder. “But now, that I know its story, I feel guilty for robbing you of it. You didn’t even know you were supposed to give up something, as I forgot to mention it to you. So you can give me something else, less important, in its stead.”

Javier shook his head resolutely.

“No”, he said, firmly. “What if doing that counts as breaking the oath? We’d be done for. Moreover, I want you to have it. I find that it suits you somehow. Besides, I’m not really giving it away, so I’m not disregarding my mother’s wishes. I’m placing it in your keeping, and you are something I must also treasure and guard with my life. So it will be like having it with me. I daresay it will be safer with you than it is with me, careless as I am.”

Yuzuru turned a deep shade of crimson, and he could only nod.

“Thank you for … your trust”, he stammered, finally. “Thank you”, he repeated, more softly, and lowered his gaze back to the brooch, examining it with his usual focus and intensity.

Javier slid closer, to point out the small uneven gems on the bird’s wings.

“Look, these stones are called marcasite. They have magical properties, to sharpen one’s consciousness and strengthen the wearer’s power and spirituality. It protects the possessor against magical control, such as you told me the Wyrdexins may use. Wearing marcasite close to your heart gives you courage and wisdom.”

“I will wear it close to my heart”, Yuzuru agreed, voice solemn like he was uttering another vow. He looked up, and this time, he met Javier’s gaze without wavering.

“Just like I will wear your necklace”, Javier replied.

“The necklace I gave you also has power”, Yuzuru said, tracing its stones with his fingers.

The questing fingers inevitably also brushed against Javier’s skin, in what became a light, yet bold caress. Javier fought back a shiver. He gazed at Yuzuru intently.

“The black ones are onyx”, Yuzuru went on. “They will help you find your centre – when you wield your weapon, but also when you make a choice – it will help you to stay true to yourself, and give you the will to keep going. The orange stones help chase away gloomy thoughts. The blue ones are for strength and endurance. The white ones are for confidence and bravery. The stones have been carefully chosen and precisely balanced. I’ve worn this necklace for a very long time, so it’s dear to me, but I can always order a similar one from the mages. My gift is not as rare, or as precious as yours”, Yuzuru ended, with some regret.

Javier could feel the blood ringing in his ears, as everything conspired to drive him wild – the strange ritual with its outstanding significance, the pleasant tiredness of his unaccustomed early rise, Yuzuru’s proximity, his soft voice, and the sensation of his fingers brushing Javier’s skin, as if by accident, but nevertheless so intently.

“Then give me a more precious gift”, Javier challenged, and captured Yuzuru’s lips in a long-awaited kiss.

They was no one around to witness it this time, except the river that witnessed their soul binding. Yuzuru might still protest that they shouldn’t waste time better spent on training, but it was early still – nothing would stop Javier now, except the knowledge that Yuzuru did not feel the same. But Yuzuru was kissing him back softly, contently, arms wrapped tightly around Javier’s neck, like they had all the time in the world. Encouraged, Javier pulled Yuzuru into his lap and deepened the kiss. He felt, rather than heard, Yuzuru sigh into the kiss, as he pressed his entire body to Javier’s, arms enveloping him in a firm hold.

It was pure bliss – the closeness that Javier had been seeking, and the pleasure he could previously only imagine. The only thing that could possibly make him stop kissing Yuzuru’s tempting mouth was the lure of other parts of Yuzuru’s body, offering up their own warmth and taste to Javier’s newly awakened appetite. Yuzuru gasped in surprise as Javier sucked and nibbled down his neck, pushing down his tunic enough to expose a round shoulder, he keened at the expert squeeze of Javier’s teeth, testing the softness of his skin, not enough to hurt, but more than enough to entice. Yuzuru’s short nails dug and scraped against Javier’s scalp, fingers pulling slightly at his curls, as unfamiliar sensations assailed him. Javier found himself getting drunk quickly on Yuzuru’s reactions, on his caresses, his hardness pressed insistently against Javier, and his hooded gaze, increasingly more heavy with lust. He knew his own eyes mirrored that look, and in that moment he wanted nothing more than to lie with Yuzuru and join them not only in soul, but also in body. Javier wanted Yuzuru like he wanted nobody else before – woman or man. He felt like he must have him, and whatever might come after, whatever threat or mortal peril, he’d face it head on. He knew that his almost desperate eagerness was probably brought about by their increased connection following the ritual, as long as by the heightened awareness of the danger that awaited. Javier let himself fall back into the welcoming grass, pulling Yuzuru on top of him.

At that point, Yuzuru seemed to awaken as if from a dream. He disentangled himself from Javier’s embrace and sat up. Even though he was still breathing heavily, gaze still clouded, he shook his head.

“We can’t allow for such distractions”, he said, regretfully. “We need our minds to be clear. There’s nothing more important than this: a clear mind may make the difference between life and death.”

Javier understood the reasoning, but he still thought that Yuzuru was being a little unfair.

“Finding comfort in each other’s arms will certainly clear our minds, and not cloud it. But if we leave each other unsatisfied, isn’t there more danger of dwelling on it, as people are wont to dwell on things that are denied? You’re already on my mind a lot, Yuzuru. You must know this. Am I on your mind at all?”

Hearing this, Yuzuru frowned, but he still shook his head stubbornly.

“You are on my mind too, Javi. Too much. But this is exactly why we must not indulge. Our flesh will weaken, and with it, the mind. We will begin to crave the comfort and pleasure, or worse, we will believe we are entitled to it. Our hand will waver on the spear.”

“I never thought of it like that”, Javier said. “Where I come from, things are simple. If I want someone, and that someone wants me back, we lie with each other and take our pleasure. We don’t worry about indulging, and we don’t call it a distraction.” He realized he was beginning to sound accusing or contrary, and shrugged, deliberately. “It seems we are at opposing ends now. Let’s not argue about trifles.”

Javier stood up and arranged his clothes, which had got quite dishevelled during their tussle. He was hurt in his pride, and saddened by Yuzuru’s decision, so he decided to act uncaring.

Yuzuru frowned, then blushed.

“I wouldn’t call them trifles”, he said, a little stung. “But you are right, let’s not argue.” He smiled a little sadly: “They bound our souls, but we remain two very different people; from two very different lands.”

“But we face a common enemy”, Javier said, shortly. “Like you said – let’s focus on what’s important.”

Yuzuru frowned again, his lips tightening in displeasure. He seemed very bothered whenever Javier dismissed what happened between them as not important, even if he was the one who said it first.

For the rest of the day, as they practised together, there was a chill between them that wasn’t there before.

Even Keiji noticed, and he looked at them curiously when Javier made a perfect throw on his first try on a moving target, and Yuzuru only managed a ‘Good.’

“Did you two fight or something?” Keiji asked, as he approached them. “It’s a bad omen to argue on the day of the soul-binding ceremony.”

Yuzuru turned to him, eyes flashing, and Keiji lifted his hands, apologetically, and went back to his post, shrugging.

“I’m just thinking it’s funny”, he threw over his shoulder. “Until now, you were like two turtle doves sharing the same branch. After the soul-binding ceremony, you’re like strangers. I suppose it’s true what they say, marriage kills romance.”

He chuckled, inordinately pleased with his own joke, and Javier turned to look pointedly at Yuzuru, more annoyed than usual at the liberties Keiji was taking. But Yuzuru got immediately into the verbal sparring like Keiji and him were two brothers teasing each other:

“You’re not exactly the expert in relationships, Keiji, so you can’t lecture us”, Yuzuru said, derisively. “Poor Satoko, shy as she is, had to tell you plainly how she felt about you, since you never got any clue by yourself.”

Keiji reddened at that, but before he could reply, an unpleasant chuckle was heard from someone walking down the stairs from the palace. It was Daisuke.

“Did I hear it right? The two princes argued? Well well. That’s unfortunate. But I’m sure you’ll make up soon, young people rarely hold grudges”, Daisuke said, nodding at them in greeting.

His smile had something insincere about it, Javier realized. It didn’t quite reach his eyes, and his gaze remained guarded, despite his cheerful tone. Daisuke looked at Javier:

“So you’re making progress. Of course, I expected no less from a hero like you.”

“I try my best”, Javier answered, acknowledging the compliment with a bow. “Yuzuru is a good teacher.”

“Your task is not easy. Far from home, now asked to defend a stranger with your life. Not quite what you were expecting, is it?”

“Truth be told, I expected nothing when I arrived. I’m not one prone to overthinking. But I don’t regret taking the oath.”

“Good, good. We need people like you, people of action. Good luck, then!”

With that, Daisuke bowed shortly, and went on his way. Javier noticed he did not acknowledge Yuzuru at all during the conversation.

“Who is he?” Javier asked, once Daisuke was out of earshot. “He seems…”, he searched for the right word – “slippery.”

“Daisuke is one of the queen’s advisors and husbands, which makes him one of the most important people in the land”, Keiji answered, shaking his head at Javier’s ignorance. “So have a care whom you insult. You don’t want him as your enemy, believe me.”

“So… that was your father-?” Javier looked at Yuzuru, surprised. If he was Yuzuru’s father, why would he behave so coldly towards him?

“He’s not Yuzuru’s father”, Keiji interrupted, gleeful at Javier’s confusion. He was about to say more, but then he got called over by his companion, the small sleepy guard, and he had to leave the conversation unfinished, to his regret.

Javier raised an eyebrow at Yuzuru, but Yuzuru merely said, as if nothing happened:

“Let’s continue the training.”

So it was still like this between them. So be it then, if Yuzuru wished it. Well, Javier would not be the first one to extend an olive branch. Although a friendly person by nature, Javier could very well be civil, yet cold. He shrugged.

“Yes, let’s continue.”

Javier had no time to dwell on whatever had happened – or rather, not happened, between himself and Yuzuru. Apart from training, he also had to prepare for the journey. Later that day, Shizuka called for him, and asked him to choose a horse, from the ones kept as spares, ready to undertake long journeys. Javier chose a brown mare which appeared both sturdy and easy to handle.

“A good choice”, Shizuka said. “Haru is strong and has a good temper. Sometimes she lets two or three children ride her and manhandle her around. She has not been in any battle yet, but she is used to the sounds and sights of combat practice. Tomorrow and the day after, come and spend some time with her, so she can get to know you. You can ride her for a while and bring her treats. That is, if you can spare time from the training.”

“I’ll be happy to!” Javier said, brightly. “I love horses. As for my combat training, I think I can practise on my own now. I’m sure Yuzuru has other business other than cater to me.”

Something must have shown in Javier’s tone, because Shizuka’s hand paused slightly from storking Haru’s mane. However, her face remained bland and kind, when she said:

“I hope my son has been treating you well.”

“He has, indeed”, Javier confirmed, firmly. “He is a very skilled fighter and very good at imparting his knowledge.”

Shizuka laughed gently.

“You must remember something about Yuzuru. He’s mostly grown up lonely, there were so few children of his age around. If sometimes he comes across as strange, or he offends you – think nothing of it, and try to forgive. He does not mean it. He can be aloof, but also kind. Sometimes I look at him and think that he’s too sensitive for his own good.”

Javier didn’t know what to reply to that, so he merely nodded.

Shizuka smiled at him, bending her head slightly, signalling Javier was free to go.

As he went off, he pondered that Shizuka was one who thought of everything – like a good queen should. Not only of the necessity of having a horse for a journey, but also that a rider and a horse should know each other before setting off. And it seems she also thought about her son’s relationship with Javier. She seemed both wise and shrewd, and – like her son, quite purposeful. Javier wondered at the meaning behind her words. How much had she guessed about his relationship with Yuzuru? Did she mean to encourage Javier, or to subtly tell him to back off?

After a couple of days of acting distant, both Yuzuru and Javier fell into the same easy camaraderie they had previously shared. However, both were careful not to address the situation which had caused their falling out. On the appointed day, they set off from the citadel at dawn, riding in companionable silence. There was no crowd to see them off, since they had already been there when the main group departed, several days ago.

As they rode further and further from the citadel, Javier noticed that Yuzuru was growing nervous. His hand was clenching on the reins, and he goaded his horse to walk faster.

Javier looked at him questioningly, but decided not to comment.

Finally, it was Yuzuru who broke the silence.

“I can’t decide if it’s better to be further away, or closer to the citadel, when the night sets.”

“But I thought the fields were four days away no matter how fast we ride”, Javier said.

He remembered Yuzuru himself telling him this, in answer to his questions, a few days ago. He mentioned that only one person made the ride in three days, the man who first carried the news of the Wyrdexins’ arrival. Both him and his horse had collapsed with exhaustion and his horse never recovered.

“Yes, that’s true”, Yuzuru nodded, then said nothing more, and seemed to sink into troubled thought.

When dusk began to set, Yuzuru stopped his horse abruptly, and dismounted.

“This would do”, he murmured, pointing towards a small slope where they might rest for the night.

They led the horses against the slope and untacked them.

Javier looked around for something to tie them to.

“There’s no need”, Yuzuru asked, guessing what he wanted. “They’re smart, and well-trained, even if they wander off to graze, they won’t go far. If there’s danger, it’s better that they’re free to run, or defend themselves.”

Javier nodded.

Yuzuru absently opened his pouch, allowing his weasel to climb down. Pooh-san scampered away with relief, to stretch his legs and look for food, although Javier noticed he was not straying far from them.

Crouching, Javier called him over, chuckling when the little creature came to sniff at his outstretched fingers. Javier played gently with his ears and caressed his soft fur. Pooh-san seemed a gentle, intelligent animal.

Meanwhile, Yuzuru was going through their provisions.

“There’s only rice bread and fruit to eat”, he said to Javier on a tone which allowed no argument. “No meat, and definitely no hunting for fresh meat.”

“Alright”, Javier agreed easily. “I’m too tired to hunt, anyway, and we haven’t encountered a living creature for miles.” He came closer and took his share, then sat down to eat. He thought it better not to ask anything, since Yuzuru looked like he might snap at any moment. But Javier finished eating, and Yuzuru still hadn’t joined him, not even to sit down. Instead, he was pacing around, not rushing, but never standing still either, looking in all directions as if expecting something. Javier couldn’t help asking him:

“Aren’t you eating?”

“I’m not hungry”, Yuzuru replied, without pausing on his fruitless lookout.

Javier wondered briefly if Yuzuru wasn’t still awkward about the two of them being alone together – or still angry at him; but something told him that this wasn’t it. Yuzuru didn’t look embarrassed, or mad. He just looked alert, and restless, frantic in a way that Javier hadn’t seen him before. In the citadel, Yuzuru had appeared calm and focused, with a steely determination. But here, out in the open, he didn’t seem able to stop his obsessive lookout in all corners of the horizon as if expecting a riot of Wyrdexins to descend upon them. It was as if something greater than him – greater than reason itself, was ruling over his mind and emotions. Javier found himself thinking with some sadness: Keiji is not the only troubled one, even if he shows it differently. And Javier could not blame either of them.

Darkness had now fully settled, and it became difficult to see further than a few paces away, the only light that of the climbing moon and gradually revealing stars. Yuzuru finally slowed his frantic pacing. He looked dejected, having apparently realized the futility of his actions. He came over to where Javier was already half-sitting, half-lying, comfortably nestled against the slope. Yuzuru sat down slowly, and stared ahead in silence. For a while, no one spoke.

Javier was worried about Yuzuru, but didn’t know how to express it without possibly offending him. At last, he coughed and said, on a deliberately casual tone:

“This raised slope offers a bit of protection, we’re almost unseen from behind, if we press close against it. And from the front, we have a clear view and there’s nothing but open ground, not a tree for miles. Anything that might come from that direction needs to go a long way before it reaches us. And they can’t come soundlessly, so it would alert us anyway. Try to get some sleep, Yuzuru.”

“No” – Yuzuru shook his head, and then unexpectedly reached out and gripped Javier’s wrist with his bony fingers. “No – we must not fall asleep!” he spoke in a rush. “They come out at night, they like to come upon us when sleep is sweeter, that’s when we’re easy prey.”

“What if I have insomnia”, Javier quipped, trying to lighten the mood.

Yuzuru ignored him, and went on, frantically:

“We must take turns to keep guard during the night, so we won’t be caught unawares if there’s danger.”

“Okay, Yuzuru”, Javier spoke, on a pacifying tone. “You go to sleep, I’ve got this. Not the first time I pulled an all-night vigil.”

“Me neither”, Yuzuru replied. “But whoever stays up all night will be slower tomorrow, and that’s no good. We both need to be battle-ready.”

That seemed reasonable to Javier, so he nodded.

“So then what do we do?” he asked.

Yuzuru looked at Javier, as he seemed to ponder. Javier couldn’t read his features in the darkness, he could only see the outline of his face and his eyes shining.

“You take the first watch, Javi. Wake me when the moon starts its descent,” he decided.

“Alright”, Javier agreed, “but then you must wake me before the moon sets. We’ll see it off together; and the riskiest part of the night, when sleep is sweeter, will find us both awake.”

Despite Yuzuru’s warnings, Javier had no real sense of danger looming. There’s something about a danger that’s only talked about, and not seen or experienced, that seems far-off and unlikely. Besides, the area seemed deserted and quiet – hardly a bird or an insect could be heard from time to time. Javier was certain that if a bunch of fearsome creatures were to creep in, however quietly, he’d hear them even in his sleep. He remained absurdly certain of this fact, even though he knew the Wyrdexins’ ability for mind control. Javier was so relaxed that he almost fell asleep, his back comfortable against the slope, lulled by the quiet and the fresh night air. As he could feel himself dozing off, the point of his spear that he had propped upwards on purpose, dug into his upper arm and brought him back to consciousness none too gently. He hissed in pain, then clamped a hand over his mouth – he didn’t want to wake Yuzuru. A sudden rustle nearby made him startle, but it was only Pooh-san burrowing around. The horses lazily stomped their feet, puffing from time to time. Javier felt reassured by their presence – he was certain they would sense danger before he did.

Surrounded by darkness, Javier allowed his thoughts to roam in a way they wouldn’t have done in the daylight. He thought about Yuzuru, his eyes wide and trusting as he repeated the words of the soul-binding oath on the riverbank. He thought about his blushing, uncertain smiles, the shy softness of his skin kept guarded like a treasure. He also thought of the passion with which Yuzuru kissed him, the strength of his arms tightly wrapped around him, the wanton sounds he made. The idea that Yuzuru could feel for him something akin to what Javier felt for Yuzuru, was intoxicating to his mind. Javier indulged in those thoughts, feeling that this could be enough for him – just the knowledge that Yuzuru wanted him as much as Javier wanted Yuzuru; without either of them acting on their desire.

The moon was now up in the sky, and Javier’s sleep had all but fled. Still, he kept his promise, and as the moon started its descent, he nudged Yuzuru softly.

“Hey”, he called. “It’s after midnight.”

He didn’t need to say anything more: Yuzuru was sleeping lightly, and woke up instantly.

“Thank you, Javi”, Yuzuru mumbled, so low it was almost whisper. “Your turn to sleep now.”

He sniffed, then stood up to shake the sleep from his limbs and stretch like a kitten, grunting softly.

His eyes were still half-closed, and hair was sticking up at all ends, and Javier had to fight the urge to ruffle it even more, or to do something similarly fond and stupid to its owner. Instead he said:

“Okay. Wake me up before dawn”, and made himself comfortable, closing his eyes.

In the end, whether it was because Yuzuru decided to let him sleep, or because Javier woke himself before Yuzuru could do it, but Javier’s eyes blinked open slowly in the heaviest darkness right before the dawn. He could hear Yuzuru’s heavy breathing next to him – Yuzuru breathed like that sometimes, as if his lungs were giving him trouble. Javier had just time to wonder how much of the night had passed, before there was a sudden change in the air, and the first sounds and rustles of nature awakening. The darkness gradually gave way, and a reddish glow appeared behind the clouds.

The first rays now broke through the clouds, casting a pale light, and Javier remembered again the riverbank in the early dawn, the sun reflected on Yuzuru’s golden skin. Javier realized then why that image was haunting him – besides being beautiful, it seemed fated, like the old stories he used to hear as a child, it was like an arresting glimpse of his destiny at a turning point in his life.

Javier reached over and lay a hand on Yuzuru’s shoulder. Yuzuru startled, but then relaxed.

“Hey”, Javier said, with some reproach. “You were just going to let me sleep?”

Yuzuru shook his head, apologetically, with a grimace:

“No, I’m sorry. I was just lost in thought.”

Javier playfully squeezed at the back of his neck, shaking him like one would an unruly pup.

“Daydreaming on duty? Fine, fine, you’re forgiven”, he joked, lightly, to show there were no hard feelings.

Then he looked at Yuzuru more seriously, assessingly.

“All good?” Javier asked, his voice dropping intimately, possibly meaning more than just the night passing without incident.

Something that was tightly-coiled with tension in Yuzuru now visibly loosened. He smiled, this time a genuine, fond smile, and nodded at Javier:

“All good.”

Javier grinned, and this time he did give it to the urge to ruffle Yuzuru’s hair. Yuzuru predictably aimed a kick at him, which Javier expertly dodged, then he stood up, and stretched, yawning. He went over to the horses, to check on them. As he patted them down, he spoke to them, gently:

“Morning, Haru, morning, Hope. Ready for the road? Still a long way to go.”

As Javier turned to look at the path ahead they were to follow today, his lingering smile gradually faded. He rubbed at his eyes, thinking his vision in the early morning light might be playing tricks on him. But no – they were still there – two moving specks, still a long way off, but steadily approaching from the same direction they were heading towards.

Chapter Text

“Are you seeing this?” Javier asked Yuzuru, who had stood up and was staring in the same direction. “What are those?”

“Nothing to do but wait and see. It looks like they’re on the path, like us. If we keep to our trail, we will meet them today.”

“Do you think they might be…. Wyrdexins?”

Yuzuru squinted.

“It’s difficult to tell at this distance, but I think not. They move differently, there’s no stealth, and they are too bold during daylight. But I can’t be too sure. Let us be prepared.”

After a quick meal, they were off. As they rode closer to the moving figures, it became obvious, to their relief, that they were two riders, in a gallop.

“They must come from the fields”, Yuzuru said. “I hope nothing bad has happened there. Let’s hurry to meet them.”

They prodded their horses to go faster. Soon enough, the riders were close enough for Yuzuru to recognize them.

“It’s Kazuki and Koshiro. They’re some years younger than me, but very resourceful, very brave. I don’t think anything bad has happened though, since they must have seen us too, and they didn’t wave the red banner, which signals danger.”

“Maybe they’re sent on an errand back to the palace”, Javier guessed.

“Maybe”, Yuzuru answered. “In a little while we’ll know.”

“Don’t panic!” they could hear one of the riders shout out when they were within earshot. “We’re just out for a stroll!”

Yuzuru burst into peals of laughter, and Javier couldn’t help a chuckle himself.

Flinging himself from horseback, Yuzuru approached them at a run and into a shared hug. Javier dismounted as well, and hovered behind, a little awkward.

“Hi!” one of the riders told him, brightly. “I’m Kazuki, and this is my sidekick, Koshiro.”

“Hey!” the other boy deadpanned. “I’m an adopted child, so of course they all bully me.”

“Have you no shame?” Kazuki laughed. “Javier will think that’s the truth.”

“It is the truth.”

“Alright, then”, Kazuki said, mischievously, then addressed Javier: “We found Koshiro in the bushes. He was raised by wolves. It was only last year he learned how to use a fork.”

Koshiro squinted at him, then said, slowly:

“Shame, I guess I’ll just keep all the healing herbs to myself then.”

“Javi – don’t listen to a word they say”, Yuzuru said, laughing, loud and unrestrained like Javier hadn’t heard him before. “Can you two tell us what you’re really doing here? I’m still a bit worried; you should be in the fields with everyone else.”

“Well, we arrived in the fields with no incidents”, Koshiro answered. And everything was good there, at least it was when we set out. So far no attacks. But we decided by ourselves to come and meet you halfway on the road.”

“Why?” Yuzuru asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Well”, Kazuki chimed in, “mostly because we didn’t want you to be alone. Two is company, three’s a crowd, and four’s a party. Safety in numbers.”

“Hmm. Well, I’m grateful”, Yuzuru said, and Javier saw that he did indeed, look moved. “It may not be much, but it does ease the mind, so thank you, my friends. But please, don’t underestimate Javier. He’s very skilled and very brave.”

Kazuki bowed gravely.

“There is no doubt”, he hurried to say. “I underestimate neither him nor you. We just thought you might feel uneasy with only one person for backup.”

“It’s not that we don’t trust you”, Koshiro told Javier. “But you’re so new to this, and you haven’t even seen your first Wyrdexin yet.”

“Me and Yuzuru took the soul-binding oath”, Javier saw fit to tell him. “Whatever happens, we will face together. If he is in danger, I will protect him with my life.”

Kazuki and Koshiro let out audible gasps at that. There may have been some disbelief in them before, which was perhaps what prompted them to ride back to protect the prince, but now they straightened and looked at Javier with awe and respect.

Yuzuru nodded at them, as if to say there, you see. Out loud, he spoke:

“Let’s rest. I’m glad the second night out in the open will give us more time to sleep.”

“You two should sleep through the whole night”, Kazuki said. “Me and Koshiro will take care of the watch.”

On the third day, they came upon uneven ground, which caused them to ride slower and more careful. The weather turned cloudy and windy, forcing them to dig into their backpacks for warmer clothes. At the beginning, Kazuki and Koshiro chatted together, and Yuzuru sometimes joined in. But the wind carried their words away and they needed to shout to be heard, so they soon wearied of it. They rode in silence as the day dragged on. Javier almost dozed, trusting Haru to pick her path, with the merest guidance from him. Koshiro and Kazuki also seemed subdued, only Yuzuru sat up straight in the saddle, looking ahead with his usual determination.

And then, out of the silence, there was a sudden commotion. The horses felt it first, and became anxious, neighing and pulling at their reins. And then, they heard the cries, followed closely by the rustle of heavy wings above the heads.

Javier could only see a big shape flying by – can Wyrdexins fly? No one’s ever told me that? - before something about the span of the creatures’ wings and their sharp cries threw him into a full-blown panic. The others were trying to calm their horses – greatly unsettled and angry by the apparitions – but Javier was in no state of mind to do so. He covered his ears and ducked, as the creatures circled around him. Sensing her rider’s unease, Haru let loose a wild neigh of terror and bucked, almost throwing Javier off.

“There’s no danger, Javier”, Kazuki shouted to him, over the din. “No danger!”

Javier hung on, arms around Haru’s neck like a rookie, heart beating wildly, beginning to come back to himself. With one last shrill cry, the creatures flew off at great speed, soon fading from their sight. But by then, all the horses were out of control, feeding off each other’s fear. They were trampling the ground under their feet and puffing, resisting their riders’ attempts to rein them in. Disgruntled by the commotion, Yuzuru’s weasel jumped out of his sack. After landing on the ground, it began to zoom back and forth among the horses’ feet, barely missing being crushed by their hooves.

“Pooh-san!” Yuzuru shouted, letting go of the reins in dismay. He dismounted, despite the danger, and tried to catch the weasel that was still scrambling about. A well-trained horse would not trample a person to death, no matter how frightened, but Yuzuru wasn’t making it easy for them, carelessly crawling on the ground among their restless hooves. An accidental hit to the head was all it took, and Yuzuru fell to the ground unconscious, his temple bleeding.

With an anguished cry, Kazuki dismounted, followed closely by Javier. They dragged Yuzuru out from underneath the horses, and Kazuki started working fast to stop the bleeding.

“That…. Was that thing a Wyrdexin?” Javier asked, when he could regain his voice.

“No”, Kazuki answered, barely containing his anger. “Those were just harpies, but they were set on us by something almost as dangerous as a Wyrdexin”, he spat out.

Javier was confused, but didn’t ask for further explanations. Together, they cleaned Yuzuru’s wound, and dressed it to the best of their ability. Pooh-san, who somehow remained unharmed, was now frantically circling his owner.

Koshiro had also dismounted, and was trying to calm the horses. They were still stomping their feet restlessly, but they seemed to be gradually relaxing – their neighing wasn’t as wild and filled with terror.

“It’s all my fault”, Javier said, chagrined. “Because of my inexperience, we are now in this mess.”

“It’s not your fault”, Kazuki replied, shortly. “It’s Daisuke’s. He let loose the harpies. He knows the horses fear them. He was trying to stir up some trouble for us, and now he’s got it.”

Kazuki threw the bloody rags to the ground in anger.

“Hey hey”, Koshiro rushed to him immediately. “What are you doing throwing those?”

“As if it matters”, Kazuki replied, “we’re out in the open anyway, and the fields aren’t far away.”

“I suppose you’re right”, Koshiro shrugged. “But why are you so sure it was Daisuke who let loose the harpies?”

“Come on, it’s obvious”, Kazuki rolled his eyes. “He has access to them, and could easily do it without anyone being aware.”

“Yes, but why?”

Kazuki looked at him annoyed.

“Like I said, to stir up trouble” – he lifted a finger, when he saw Koshiro open his mouth again. “If you’re gonna ask why again, I will smack you.”

Koshiro didn’t appear very threatened. He got into Kazuki’s face and repeated pointedly:

“Why?”

Kazuki sighed, defeated. “You’re making me remember old stories I’ve been hearing, that I’d rather not remember”, he mumbled, with a side-glance at Javier, as if to check if he was listening.

“Oh? I like stories”, Koshiro said, unconcernedly. “What’s Daisuke done for you to accuse him like that?”

Kazuki shook his head.

“Let’s not talk about it now. Maybe I’ll tell you later. For now, we have more important things to worry ourselves with.”

Javier looked up.

“What do we do?” he asked.

Koshiro came over and picked up the weasel from where it lay now, pressed against Yuzuru’s side, as if remorseful.

“Come on, Pooh-san. Let’s get you back in your pouch.”

“We keep riding”, Kazuki said, in answer to Javier’s question. “Nothing else we can do.”

“What about Yuzuru?” Javier asked. “He’s still unconscious.”

“Not for long, I hope.”

Kazuki bent over Yuzuru and poked at his shoulder, gently, but impatiently:

“Yuzu? Hey, Yuzu! Can you please wake up? Come on, you’re made of strong stuff, don’t let me down now.” He poured some water on his fingers and splashed Yuzuru’s face. “I’m sorry for this. But you need to wake up.”

Yuzuru groaned, and stirred, blinking slowly. He opened his eyes halfway:

“What is it?” he slurred.

“Are you fit to ride?” Kazuki asked him urgently, without any preamble.

“Huh yeah, of course, but what-”, Yuzuru made to stand up quickly, but then immediately fell back down, a hand to his head, gasping in pain. “… Or maybe not, I might throw up. My head is pounding.”

“Maybe we should rest a while”, Koshiro suggested. “I think I hear a stream close by, I could go and refill our water bottles. Our water’s almost gone.”

“What happened?” Yuzuru asked, unhappily, still holding his head, probing at his makeshift bandage for clues. “Why do I feel like I drank more sake than Daisuke on a festival day?”

“Just take it easy, okay?” Kazuki said. “Don’t fuss, try to rest a bit. Me and Koshiro will go and get water. Hopefully by the time we’re back, you’ll feel better.”

Koshiro gave Yuzuru some ground herbs from a pouch he carried.

“Take these, they’ll help with the sickness.”

“Thanks, Koshiro.”

“We’ll be back soon. Come on, Kazu.”

Javier sat down heavily next to Yuzuru.

“I’m sorry”, he said.

“It’s not your fault, Javi”, Yuzuru assured him, chewing patiently at the herbs and grimacing at their taste. “It’s this little brat’s fault”, he caressed the weasel’s small head poking out of his sack. “Don’t make me regret I took you with us, Pooh-san. In the palace, they’d have kept you in a cage.” The weasel gave a low whistle of contentment and Yuzuru hummed approvingly.

“It’s not his fault either, he was frightened too”, Javier defended him.

Yuzuru looked up at Javier with a smile.

“I know, I’m just teasing. Anyway, there’s no harm done.”

“You could have been wounded way worse,” Javier said, frowning.

“And I could’ve been eaten by a Wyrdexin when I was five. Such is life”, Yuzuru said, lightly. After a small pause, he continued, on a more serious tone: “Harpies can appear frightening to someone who sees them for the first time. And horses are notoriously terrified of them for some unknown reason. But they don’t usually harm either people, or horses. They feed on small animals. Their sudden arrival usually portents bad weather.”

Javier shifted, and looked down at his hands.

“I know about harpies”, he finally said. “And I’m not such a weakling as to be afraid of them, even at first sight. You must think I’m such a wimp.”

Yuzuru reached out his hand to clasp Javier’s, reassuringly:

“No, Javi-”, he began.

“…. and you’d be right”, Javier went on, “I’m a wimp, but it’s just that they reminded me of some creatures I’ve first glimpsed a long time ago, creatures which first opened my eyes to the fact that the world is not a safe place, but filled instead with random, unpredictable evil...”

Yuzuru squeezed Javier’s hand in sympathy and encouragement, waiting for him to continue. But Javier merely shook his head and laughed self-deprecatingly, refusing to return the look, even though he squeezed Yuzuru’s hand in return.

“What kind of creatures were they?” Yuzuru finally asked, curiously. “Nothing that frightened you could be anything short of horrific”, he said, with certainty.

Javier chuckled.

“You think so highly of me. They are giant carnivorous creatures that my people call corpse swallowers. They’re usually carrion birds, hence the name. They can grow as big as a house and can easily swallow an entire corpse in one mouthful. But if they swoop in from the sky, neither the dead, nor the living are safe.”

“It sounds awful. Are there many of them in your land?”

“Fortunately not. They are rare, especially these days. People have taken to destroying their nests, built up on high places, and killing their chicks before they could grow up to be threatening. I’ve been on such expeditions, myself. I even…” Javier laughed, hollow. “If you can believe it, I even felt sorry for those poor helpless things as they were massacred. They could barely squeak, a far cry from the blood-curdling shrieks of their parents. They’d try to scratch at you with those small claws. Pitiful, really. I wonder – Oh I wonder many things but…. It really couldn’t be helped, you understand that, right?” He paused, waiting for Yuzuru to reply, but there was only silence. Javier thought Yuzuru might be pondering his answer, as he often did, so he went on: “I’m sure that if you could find the nests of the Wyrdexins and discover their young there – cubs, chicks, what do you even call them? feasting on mice or other small creatures, barely able to crawl on the ground by themselves – wouldn’t you also feel a twinge of pity? But deep down you’d know – it’s them or you. After all, they never showed pity for your young; did they? They feasted on the children of your people for so long….” Finally Javier thought Yuzuru’s silence was a little strange, so he turned around to look at him. Yuzuru had fallen asleep against the tree they were leaning against, hand still in Javier’s own.

Javier smiled, endeared.

“Well, you’re welcome for the bedtime story, I guess.”

He rummaged in Yuzuru’s backpack for his blanket, and covered him with it. There was no need for it, as the wind had stopped, and it was warmer than in the morning, but Javier felt he must care for him somehow. Yuzuru’s brow was furrowed, strands of sweaty hair clinging to his forehead and the bandage around his head. He twitched restlessly, as if pain still plagued him even in sleep. There was an unhealthy sheen on his face, and Javier gazed at him more intently, eyes narrowing. He reached out and gently touched the side of Yuzuru’s face. His suspicion was confirmed: it was burning hot. Javier retreated his hand quickly, cursing under his breath. He arranged the blanket tighter around Yuzuru, and used the clean piece of cloth to wipe at his face gently.

Yuzuru stirred.

“It’s okay”, Javier said, quietly. “You can sleep, Koshiro and Kazuki aren’t back yet.”

“Javi”, Yuzuru said, slowly, looking up at him with shining eyes.

“Hm?”

“Javi. I’m sorry.”

“Why are you sorry?”

“You know why. That day, by the river, after the swearing ceremony, I…”

“You’re running a fever, Yuzuru. Let’s not talk about this now.”

“But you mustn’t think I-”

“Look, that doesn’t matter.”

“It matters to me”, Yuzuru muttered, on a low, hurt voice.

This time, Javier couldn’t pretend he was indifferent. He kissed Yuzuru’s forehead, forgetting his pride:

“You’re right, it matters a lot. I was stupid.”

Yuzuru was shaking his head, even before Javier finished speaking:

“No, no, I was wrong.”

“Yuzuru, don’t do this now. I respect your decision, and I don’t expect you to change your mind. I’m sorry if I guiltied you into it with my behaviour. I promise everything is alright between us.”

Javier took Yuzuru’s hand again and squeezed it, to emphasize his point, grateful when Yuzuru squeezed it back.

“So, don’t worry about this anymore, and don’t doubt me”, Javier said, earnestly. “As the limbs of one body, sharing one breath of life – right? That’s how we are.”

“Mmm, yes, Javi”, Yuzuru agreed, clutching Javier’s hand to his chest as he nestled against him. Then he closed his eyes, tiredly. “Must be the herbs Koshiro gave me”, he mumbled, with some embarrassment, “making me so sleepy. I’ll only sleep a little while. Only a little.”

When Kazuki and Koshiro returned, Yuzuru was sleeping soundly, bundled up against Javier, and Javier only let go of him enough to briefly press a finger to his lips, signalling for them to be quiet.

“We need to go”, Kazuki whispered urgently. “The weather is taking a turn for the worse, we cannot afford to linger.”

“Just a little bit more”, Javier whispered back pleadingly, echoing Yuzuru’s earlier words.

Kazuki looked sympathetic and apologetic, but then he firmly shook his head and approached them. Javier sighed, resigned.

“I’ll wake him”, he said quickly, wanting to prevent Kazuki from poking and splashing Yuzuru again.

Javier ran his fingers through Yuzuru’s hair gently.

“Yuzuru? We have to ride on now, are you ready?”

Yuzuru merely mumbled something and burrowed closer into Javier. Now it was Kazuki’s turn to sigh and roll his eyes. Koshiro kneeled next to Yuzuru and checked his forehead, and his pulse.

“I think he still needs some time to recover”, Koshiro said, frowning. “He’s sluggish and running a fever. Maybe that blow to his head was worse than we thought.”

“Then the sooner we get him to the fields, the better”, Kazuki insisted. “We have experienced healers there who can deal with this. Besides,… this has been worrying me since I saw those clouds – a storm might be coming overnight, and we’re all going to be drowned rats if we sleep out in the open, and Yuzuru will be much the worse for it. We should try to reach the The Bronze Hollows for shelter.”

Koshiro nodded thoughtfully, and Javier repeated:

“The Bronze Hollows?”

“It’s a cave where our people used to mine copper. It’s our last milestone on our way to the fields, we usually shelter there on the last night.”

“How far is it from here?” Javier asked.

Kazuki squinted, looked around, and guessed:

“I’d say about twenty miles. That would make about three hours’ ride on this uneven ground, with bad visibility.”

“Alright”, Javier said, as he made his decision. “Let’s go then. Yuzuru will ride with me. Haru can carry the both of us. And one of you can lead Hope. It will be slow, but hopefully we’ll make it to the cave by dusk.”

“That’s…”, Kazuki began, as if he wanted to argue, “… actually a good idea”, he conceded. “Thank you.”

Both Koshiro and Kazuki seemed relieved at the solution. They put Yuzuru and Javier’s backpacks on Hope; Koshiro was to lead her. Then they each took a drink of the fresh water, and made ready to leave. Amid small sips, Yuzuru mumbled to Javier, eyes heavy:

“I can ride by myself.”

“You can barely keep your eyes open,” Javier answered, brushing at his damp forehead, eyes filled with worry.

Mounting Haru, Javier reached a hand down to Yuzuru to help him up. Then he noticed Yuzuru was shivering, teeth chattering, having discarded the warm blanket. The fever was in full-force. As he made to climb up, Javier stopped him.

“That won’t do”, Javier said sternly. He dismounted, and bundled up Yuzuru back into the blanket, despite his protests, then he lifted him up on Haru’s back. He had no idea if Yuzuru’s red cheeks were from the fever, or he was actually blushing from being treated like this, but Javier decided to ignore it either way. If Yuzuru was stronger, he would argue more, and struggle more, but ill as he was, he was weak as a kitten and easy to manhandle. Javier climbed up behind him, grabbing the reins, as he led Haru onto their path. Yuzuru tried to sit up straight with the last of his dignity, but soon he gave up entirely, and pressed back against Javier, who held him close, so he wouldn’t be jostled too much. Fortunately, Haru was a clever and experienced horse, and knew how to pick her way with minimal guidance from the rider. She did not seem bothered by the extra weight, and trotted on confidently.

Still they were slow to advance. Javier looked worriedly up at the skies heavy with clouds, wondering how soon the rain would come.

As the day dragged on, he remained aware only of Yuzuru’s warm, comforting weight against his chest. His slender waist fit so well in the tight circle of Javier’s arms. He was leaning back heavily against Javier, his breathing shallow and jerky, a clear indication that he was not doing well.

“Are you comfortable?” Javier checked with him in a low tone.

“Don’t worry about me”, Yuzuru slurred. “I’m fine.”

Even though he clearly was not as fine as he claimed, Javier could read in Yuzuru’s tone that he was annoyed at being doted on like this in the presence of his younger friends.

So he changed his tone to a normal one, and changed the subject.

“Good. How far are we from the fields? Will the path get more even?”

“Yes. Even before we reach the Bronze Hollows. When you start to see purple in front of your eyes, it means we’re close”, Yuzuru rasped. “It’s the fields of heather, where our sheep graze.”

“Must be a nice sight”, Javier said, encouraged.

“Now *there’s a nice sight”, Koshiro said, and pointed.

A reddish rocky formation loomed ahead.

“The Bronze Hollows!” Kazuki exclaimed, in relief. “We’ve made it!”

“And just in time, it seems”, Koshiro added. “It’s beginning to rain.”

Javier urged Haru on faster, and pulled Yuzuru tighter against him, to shelter him.

“I’m not going to die from a little rain, Javi”, Yuzuru’s muffled complaint came through, but Javier ignored him. He pressed him closer. The necklace Yuzuru gave him clung against his sweaty neck, bristling with promise. Yuzuru was not well and it was as if a part of Javier was not well, he felt it strongly like a nag on the brain, one that he couldn’t get rid of, no matter how hard he tried. Yuzuru’s ill spelled out a similar ill for him – even if Javier was not the injured one. He couldn't think about anything else, no matter how hard he tried. He knew Yuzuru was still trying to hide from him, out of some misguided pride maybe, and he wanted to shake him out of it, because he was going to be the one suffering from it, too.

They reached the cave at sundown.

Javier helped Yuzuru down, and placed bundles of clothing and blankets in the corner of the cave, as a makeshift bed. Yuzuru drank thirstily from the bottle of water, then sank gratefully into the lair Javier directed him towards, closing his eyes.

The others sat down to eat, but Yuzuru shook his head firmly at any offers of food. He turned around facing the cold wall of the cave, coughing, pulling the blankets close against his body. Javier trembled, as if he himself felt the tremors of sickness. He put his own food aside, and excused himself. Kazuki and Koshiro exchanged worried glances. He slid behind Yuzuru and blanketed him with his own body, embracing him as if he wanted to share his own life force with him. He half expected Yuzuru to pull away but he didn’t. Instead, Yuzuru melted back against him, with a grateful sigh, as if Javier’s body heat was the very thing he had been hoping for. Reassured, Javier tightened his grip, and fell asleep almost immediately. Whatever thunder and flood raged outside that night, he remained blissfully unaware.

Later, in the darkness, Javier startled awake. He was now facing the door of the cave, and he could still hear the rain. It was not wholly dark, he could see through the dimness the light beginning to break. He could not see Koshiro or Kazuki – their blankets were tossed aside as if they got up in a hurry. Javier blinked in confusion. And suddenly, it was as if his vision refocused and he could see it in front of him. It did not creep in, or rush in – it was simply there, in the cave with them, as if it had always been. Watching them.

Javier felt a cold stab of fear and his throat went dry. He gave a start and shuddered, as if awakened from a frightful dream. But the monster in front of his eyes was very real. Later on, Javier would try to remember the way the monster looked and which aspect of it awakened such a visceral reaction in Javier, such a primal repulsion. He was unable to find an answer. The monster crouched on two short hind legs like a toad, poised to spring. Its front legs were spindly and long. It had two vestigial wings kept close to his back, which aided it not in flight, but in making large springs. Its long body was covered in a what looked like a hard shell, like a tortoise. Its long scaled tail ended in a sharp needle, like a scorpion’s. What Javier took at first for its horns were actually large, bulbous eyes, set at the top of a misshapen head. It had no neck, which gave the impression of a hunch where the head connected with its bent spine. It had long, insect-like antennae that felt the ground and the air. They appeared to guide its movements more than the eyes, as it probed and scented the surroundings. The monster opened its mouth and made a snapping sound, and Javier saw a myriad of pointy teeth, that seemed to clatter and clash against each other. Javier’s hand went instinctively for his spear. He grabbed it, his fingers clenching on it.

“Throw it!” he dimly heard Yuzuru shouting behind him. “Throw the spear!”

But Javier stood frozen. He gazed on the beast as if under a spell, in disbelief and reluctant fascination, in a futile attempt of reshaping his world to one that contained such a creature.

In the blink of an eye, he was back in his childhood, during a first encounter with the giant bird that his people called ‘the corpse swallower’. His father had rescued him then, carrying him away from danger, into a nearby cave where they waited out the danger from the sky to pass. Javier had cried then, in shock and disbelief, trembling like a leaf, and asking his father ‘Why must such things be? ’’ His father had no answer. ‘It is not for us to ask such questions ’, he said sternly. ‘Be a man about it.’ That just made Javier cried harder, upset at the injustice of it all. The world was supposed to be filled with beautiful things, beautiful and safe, so one may explore it with joy . What good was a world where one had to watch out all the time for unseen dangers. A world where you could find your death in the next moment being picked up by a monster from the sky you didn’t even see coming – such a world was not what Javier signed up for. He stomped his little foot, still frightened and angry about it, and his father got angry in turn. “It is our lot”, he answered sternly. “You can whine about it, or you can grow up to fight them. Either way, you won’t be safe. But at least you won’t die a wimp.” Javier swallowed his tears and grimaced, wounded in his pride. As much as he wanted to run and hide in his mother’s arms, who would hug him and tell him everything would be alright – he also wanted to be a man about it and not disappoint his father. There was strength in him, not only fear. He knew that. “You are the son of a king”, his father went on, “soon to be a king yourself. You will have your own people to look out for. If you’re too scared to do that, where does that leave them?”

Javier startled back to the present, his hand clenching on his weapon.

People to look out for.

Yuzuru.

There was no time for a well-prepared throw, nor the finesse which he was beginning to master during his last practices in the citadel. In a split second, Javier sprung to his feet, and swung the spear with all his might, hoping it hit.

In the split second it took for the spear to hit, the monster’s head quickly retreated into the shell of its back. The spear bounced off the hard shell. It even bent its legs underneath itself and then it lay there still, like an overgrown boulder. With its greyish, dark green colour, Javier might as well have passed it for a boulder, had it not known what it was.

Javier’s terror was quickly replaced by anger.

“Is it mocking me?” he shouted. “It did not retreat until after I threw my weapon. It’s taunting me, mocking me!”

He heard Yuzuru’s laboured intakes of breath behind him as he stood up shakily, coming up beside Javier.

“Well, you took your time throwing it. It probably didn’t think you were gonna do it.”

“They have no fear of us, of our weapons! None!” Javier shouted, waving his hands in a frenzy. The thought made chills run down his spine, and that made him angrier in turn.

“No, they don’t”, Yuzuru agreed, sadly.

“How can you sound so resigned about it!” Javier snapped at him. He gave in to his anger, a good mask for how unsettled and frightened he was. “I hate this!” he howled.

He went to pick his weapon, visibly shaking as he came closer to the still unmoving boulder.

“It’s alright”, Yuzuru said, “they can’t hurt us while they’re in the shell like this. It’s a stalemate.”

“To hell with it!” Javier viciously stabbed the hard shell of the Wyrdexin, even though he knew it would do more harm to his spear than to the creature.

“Hey,” Yuzuru came up and lay a hand on his arm. “Let it go. You can’t do anything about it for now. Come, let’s stand back.”

The touch was gentle but pressing. Javier gave in, allowing himself to be led back to their makeshift bed.

Yuzuru winced slightly as he sat back down. His complexion looked sallow, still feverish.

“You shouldn’t be running around”, Javier mumbled. “Go back to sleep, I’ll keep watch.”

Yuzuru shook his head. He closed his eyes tightly, as if trying to steel himself. When he opened them, they showed new resolve.

“No, I must teach you now what we do to get them out of their shell, and kill them. Prepare yourself, it will be a messy – and exhausting business.”

Javer stared at him. Unexpectedly, the prospect of scoring a win against the creature – even if it came with more danger and toil, made him elated.

“Let’s do this! Let’s send this monster back to the hell it crawled from!”

“Right”, Yuzuru answered, more sedately, but no less determined. “First, we need a fire.”

Chapter Text

Javier hastened to light a fire from the logs that remained from last evening. It took him a long time because of the humidity in the air. His hands trembled slightly in fear and anticipation. He felt chilled to the bone. At one point, he chanced a look back at the boulder, and thought he saw the creature’s limbs stirring underneath its shell. He cursed silently and turned back to his task with renewed urgency. Yuzuru was merely staring silently at the boulder and did not react.

When the fire was finally lit, Yuzuru walked over to it, and took two flaming branches. Holding them up like torches, he walked over to the beast which now looked like a perfectly round ball. But Javier knew that there were crevices where its limbs and head would be hidden, and correctly guessed Yuzuru meant to roast the monster out of its shell.

“When I poke it here, its hind legs will spring out,” Yuzuru explained. “When it does, use your Salchow to tear them off. You must work fast.”

Javier drew out his dagger from his belt, and nodded, firmly.

“You can count on me.”

Yuzuru made eye contact and nodded briefly. Then he rammed the flaming torches inside the shell. The monster’s frog-like hind legs sprung out as if released from a spring, seemingly against the creature’s will, as the rest of it remained unmoving. Javier stabbed fast at its left leg, trying to sever the sinews and paralyze it, and jumped over the boulder to give the right one a similar blow. Then he swung in turn at the crawling limbs more powerfully, meaning to hack them off entirely. The monster gave a bellow, and shuddered. Its wings sprang out as well, and Javier had to jump to avoid them, as he continued his assault on the monster’s hind legs. No matter how he stabbed, the limbs still twitched, their sinews stubbornly resisting the sharpness of the blade. Yuzuru waved the flame towards the large wings, making them smoulder, then pressed the burning torch to one of limbs, crushing it into the ground as he did so, while pinning the other one with his spear. That gave Javier more time to hack at the monster’s flesh until the limbs were finally still. The monster was now rabid, trying to crawl away on its spindly front legs, its seared wings flapping weakly behind it. Yet still it kept its head stubbornly hidden inside the shell. Ignoring Yuzuru’s warning cry, Javier leapt in front of it, and dealt two swift blows to its crawling legs. The blows would have been enough to incapacitate any other creature Javier had encountered, but it only served to bring the Wyrdexin to a paroxysm of anger. Fast as lighting, its head emerged from its shell, only to snap its monstrous teeth at Javier, tearing off his shirt and narrowly missing flesh.

Yuzuru gave an anguished cry and jumped on the creature’s back. Furiously clinging to the creature’s humped slippery back, he shoved the burning branches into the hole where the creature’s head had hastily retreated. The monster began struggling fiercely, but Yuzuru did not relent, and pressed the burning branches further inside the hole. The Wyrdexin was now trying earnestly to escape, crawling towards the exit of the cave. Javier jumped in front of him again, and used both their spears to pin its front legs to the ground, like he had seen Yuzuru do. He looked up anxiously at Yuzuru who was still clinging to the creature’s back, struggling to keep the lit torches inside the shell, even as the monster writhed horribly and bucked to throw him off.

“Yuzuru!” Javier shouted. “Tell me how to help! I’m climbing up there!”

Yuzuru shook his head. He was sweating heavily and breathing hard, but he was not budging, an intent, almost mad look on his sallow face.

“Tear off the legs”, he panted.

Javier made a noise of frustration. It seemed to him that the monster was well-pinned and they would now do well to focus on tearing off its head. As if he could guess Javier’s train of thoughts, Yuzuru haltingly explained:

“It can still break free… and then it can attack…. cut off its legs, Javi...”

Javier set off to hack the monster’s front legs, which, despite looking thin and weak, were surprisingly unyielding, even to the sharp bite of Javier’s dagger. By the time Javier finally managed it, he was also sweating profusely. He gave a wild cry of satisfaction, and looked up at Yuzuru. Javier’s smile faded, as he noticed that Yuzuru was barely hanging onto the monster’s back, his eyes dangerously hazy, even as he still clutched the torches in a death-like grip. Without asking for Yuzuru’s permission this time, Javier took a deep breath to stave off his lingering terror and profound disgust, and climbed up onto the monster’s back. He clutched Yuzuru’s waist to reassure him of his presence, and then tried to pry the torches from Yuzuru’s hand.

“I’ve got this, Yuzu. You can let go, I’ve got this.”

Yuzuru shook his head weakly.

“It will come out… in a moment”, he rasped, with difficulty. “When it does… the spear… through the eyes…”

Javier understood. He nodded, and squeezed again at Yuzuru’s waist in acknowledgement. He tried to speak up with a confidence he did not altogether feel:

“I got it, Yuzu. Leave it to me.”

The tension seemed to seep out of Yuzuru, or his exhaustion took over at last. His head fell against Javier’s shoulder, as his grip on the branches lessened. A furious heave from the monster had the branches flying off in a corner of the cave, and then the monster’s head shot out of its shell, with a resounding roar. Javier’s blood froze in his veins, but he acted fast as lightning, fueled by a sudden surge of energy. He jumped to his feet on the creature’s back, dimly feeling Yuzuru sliding away from him, as he fell to the ground. Gripping his spear, Javier flung it with an answering cry through the creature’s bulbous eyes that were roving towards him. It went through surprisingly easy. The eyes were the creature’s most vulnerable part, Javier realized, taking courage at the thought. It was not wholly impenetrable. The creature’s roar abruptly turned into a screech. The scarred wings flapped wildly, as it fell onto its side. Javier jumped nimbly off its back. For a few seconds he simply stared at it darkly, as it writhed on the ground, a shapeless form in agony. Then, on an impulse, he took Yuzuru’s spear and thrust it to join his own, using it to fully pin the creature to the ground by its protruding eyes. Then, finally, the monster stopped its writhing, and was still.

Javier gave a shuddering sigh. It was over. He took a second to gather his thoughts, and convince himself that he had survived unscathed. Then, remembering Yuzuru, he was jolted back into action.

Yuzuru still lay unmoving where he had fallen, face down on the ground. Javier rushed over to him and pulled him into his lap, trying to warm him up with the heat of his body. Carefully, he wiped at the beads of sweat on Yuzuru’s face and found his face frozen to touch - his lips blue and his eyes closed. For one long, tormented moment, Javier waited for a breath that did not come. He cupped Yuzuru’s face between his palms almost desperately, and gasped in relief when Yuzuru finally opened his eyes, and heaved in a stuttering breath. Yuzuru’s lips moved, and Javier had to lean in close to hear him.

“Oh, I had a strange dream”, Yuzuru slurred, his eyes unfocused.

Javier chuckled:

“You’ll tell me later.”

“Mmm”, Yuzuru murmured, his eyelids heavy. But then he suddenly seemed to remember what happened, and sat up, abruptly:

“Is it dead?” he asked, urgently.

Javier pressed a hand on his chest to stop him from rising:

“It’s dead”, he confirmed. “You can rest.”

The rush of his first Wyrdexin kill belatedly registered with Javier. He could almost be happy, under different circumstances.

“Good”, Yuzuru nodded, and Javier could feel him sagging again in his arms. Unexpectedly, he coughed, almost choking, and Javier’s worry for him returned. When Yuzuru wanted to stand up again, Javier held him tighter:

“Be still. Lay down for a while. You’ve exhausted yourself.”

“No”, Yuzuru protested. “We must go on. There may be more of them.” Then he gave a start and looked wildly around the cave:

“Where are Kazu and Koshiro?”

Javier’s eyes fell again on their abandoned blankets, and his heart sank.

“I don’t know”, he murmured, afraid to voice his fears. “Our horses seem to be gone too.”

“We must look for them”, Yuzuru said, firmly.

His steely tone gave Javier no room to argue. Reluctantly, Javier let go of him, and Yuzuru stood up. Stumbling, but determined, he went to retrieve Axel, and made his way towards the exit of the cave. Collecting his own weapons, Javier followed closely.

Outside, a fine, misty rain greeted them. Javier judged it must be mid-morning by now, yet the sky was so downcast, it might as well have been early dawn. The most dangerous time to meet a Wyrdexin, he remembered. He looked around warily. Their surroundings took bleak uncertain shapes in the dim light, making them fear danger from every direction. There was no sign of Kazuki and Koshiro.

Yuzuru looked around despairingly, as if weighing how far it was safe to venture on foot – and in which direction they should search. There was a rustling through the grass, and they turned sharply towards the sound. It was Pooh-san who was rushing towards them through the greenery, wet but happy to greet his master. Javier wondered what he was doing outside during such bad weather when he could have been inside the cave with them. Then he wondered if the weasel had somehow sensed the Wyrdexin before they did. If so, could his return mean that the danger had passed?

Yuzuru placed Pooh-san securely in his pouch, then straightened with a set look in his eyes, having apparently reached a decision. Placing two fingers in his mouth, he whistled loudly. He waited for a beat, and Javier waited too, heart in his throat, hoping the signal would not attract unwanted visitors. Yuzuru whistled again, even louder. Finally, they could hear the far-off sound of hooves. Javier almost laughed in relief, as he glimpsed Hope and Haru approaching at a gallop. They pranced around them, neighing happily, and nudging Yuzuru and Javier with their noses, but refused to enter the cave.

Yuzuru looked over at Javier:

“Javi, help me please”, he murmured, ashamed that he had to ask.

Javier went over and supported Yuzuru as he climbed into the saddle with some difficulty.

“What are you doing?” he argued. “You’re still not well enough.”

“You go and pack our stuff, meanwhile I’ll do a quick search of the surroundings”, Yuzuru told Javier, on a tone which brooked no argument. “They can’t have gone far.”

“Let me at least come-”, Javier began nonetheless, but Yuzuru had already set off.

“I’ll return shortly”, he shouted over his shoulder at Javier.

Javier sighed, and went back inside to gather their things. He packed up Koshiro and Kazuki’s stuff as well. On his way back outside, he stopped momentarily to glance at the dead Wyrdexin. Fascination and disgust battled in Javier’s mind, his previous terror replaced by anger and weariness. They were so difficult to kill – it seemed like such an empty, pointless struggle. But kill them they must – if they wanted to live. He shook himself firmly out of his intrusive thoughts, and hurried outside.

The fog appeared even denser, and Javier sighed in frustration. Briefly, he wondered if he should not go after Yuzuru, but he did not know in which direction. And if Yuzuru were to return in the meantime and not find him, it would do more harm than good.

He patted Haru, addressing her seriously:

“Why is Yuzuru like this? Can you tell me? You’ve known him longer than me.”

Haru neighed contently, in her sedate, affectionate manner, and pushed her nose into Javier’s palm, eager for more cuddles.

“You know but you won’t tell me, eh, Haru? That’s alright. I wouldn’t have him any other way.”

Javier smiled to himself, as if he had just realized the truth of these words himself.

At that moment, he heard a shrill, desperate scream coming out of the fog:

“Javiiiiii!”

Javier turned towards the sound, his heart jumping in his chest.

“Yuzu!” he shouted back. “I’m coming!”

He threw himself into the saddle and guided Haru blindly through the fog, towards the sound.

Yuzuru kept shouting at intervals to guide him, and Javier soon managed to find him. He was apparently unharmed, and Javier’s tense frame sagged in relief. Yuzuru was kneeling on the muddy ground, dirty and soaked with rain, his eyes wet, mouth open ready to shout again. On catching sight of Javier, the shout turned into a sob. And then Javier’s eyes fell on the red bundle in Yuzuru’s lap.

At first, he couldn’t make sense of what he was seeing – the body was mangled beyond belief; but then Yuzuru sobbed again:

“It’s Koshiro”, he said, but Javier’s mind refused to process this.

Instead his eyes fixated on Koshiro’s herb pouch, stained with red, that Yuzuru was now clutching in his right hand.

“I’m so sorry, Yuzuru…”

Yuzuru simply nodded, closing his eyes tightly, as fresh tears overwhelmed him. Javier wanted nothing more than to wrap him in his arms and comfort him. But he could not afford such indulgence. They could not even mourn in peace – they might still be in danger.

“Where is Kazuki?” Javier asked faintly.

Yuzuru shook his head.

“I don’t know…”

“I’ll look for him”, Javier offered. “Stay here”, he told Yuzuru firmly, anticipating argument, but Yuzuru merely grimaced, as he rocked the bundle in his arms that was Koshiro back and forth.

Javier set off with such anger and heartbreak tearing at his insides, that any fear was soon forgotten. He guided Haru firmly through the fog, intent only on finding Kazuki, and disregarding any possible danger to himself.

Javier smelled the blood before he found what he was looking for. Like Koshiro, Kazuki was a formless bloody pile on the ground. The Wyrdexins seemed to have feasted on them both, leaving only the remains. Javier’s stomach turned, but he dismounted and gathered Kazuki’s remains with reverence, to bring them back to Yuzuru. He would have to bring yet more bad news to Yuzuru, and Javier felt a hollow pain in his stomach at the thought. But he couldn’t delay – they needed to get moving. There seemed to be more Wyrdexins about, and if they came upon them in large numbers, no amount of bravery and skill could save them.

Javier rode back to where he left Yuzuru. He hadn’t moved – he was sitting in that same position, Koshiro’s remains in his lap, looking down, still as a statue.

“Yuzuru”, Javier said gently, and when Yuzuru looked up, he saw that his eyes were empty. Javier realized that Yuzuru had no hope that he would find Kazuki unharmed. Indeed, Yuzuru’s eyes widened only slightly upon seeing the burden Javier carried with him, and Javier’s grave nod told him all he needed to know. He nodded back, listlessly, face twisting in a grimace of misery, but then he was quiet – he had no more tears to shed.

Javier didn’t know what to do. Carefully, he dismounted and approached him tentatively. He took one of Yuzuru’s hands in his own – he didn’t know if more contact was welcomed at this point.

“The necklace is working”, Yuzuru finally said, his voice distant, as if from far away, in a dream. “And your brooch as well. We did not fall prey to their spell, our minds were clear so we sensed danger and we could fight. Kazuki and Koshiro must have been caught unawares, unable to wake, and so they were easy prey.”

Javier shuddered.

“Why weren’t they wearing necklaces like yours?” he couldn’t help asking.

“It’s not certain that they work. Some people believe, others don’t. Indeed, they may not work.” Yuzuru shrugged. “Yet another uncertainty. Yet another instance of me being spared, at the expense of others.”

“Yuzuru, don’t”, Javier whispered, “don’t do this to yourself….”

Yuzuru went on, as if he hadn’t heard him, on the same distant, strangely quiet tone:

“When I was a child and they came for me, I didn’t struggle. I knew it was no use. I closed my eyes and imagined I was having a nightmare – it was surprisingly easy to pretend that – and when I woke up I would be safe, in another world. You see, Javi, my ancestors believe that death is like a long, undisturbed, dream of peace. Like a reward for a lifelong struggle. But only gods can awaken from it at will. People want to avoid death because it’s so final. But I sometimes crave the stillness, the quiet of it all. I look at the statue of the goddess and I envy her – not because she can wake, but because she sleeps still. Isn’t that lucky of her?”

Javier looked at Yuzuru strangely. He did not fully understand, but he nodded. Then he said, regretfully:

“Yuzuru, we need to get going. We will take Kazuki and Koshiro’s remains back to the village, so they can get a proper burial. But we can’t delay any longer. Especially in this weather, when fog is thick and shapes are dim. We can’t defend ourselves properly in case of an attack.”

Yuzuru raised his eyes and looked at Javier searchingly. Javier felt bare and exposed under that intense gaze. He blushed and looked away.

“You’re right, Javi”, Yuzuru said finally, with a pale smile, lowering his eyes. “I don’t know what I’d have done without you.”

“Don’t – don’t say that”, Javier replied, bitterly. “Without me, you’d have been in the fields by now, instead of on the road, attacked by Wyrdexins.”

“The danger is everywhere”, Yuzuru replied, evenly. He painstakingly rose to his feet, and went to face Javier. “All of our time is borrowed. I know this, Koshiro and Kazuki knew it too. Don’t burden yourself with guilt needlessly, Javi. I need you whole and clear-headed.”

Yuzuru caressed Javier’s arm gently, giving it a meaningful squeeze.

Javier smiled tightly.

“Everything is packed. I will place Koshiro and Kazuki’s remains on Hope and we will ride Haru together again. Do you think their horses are dead, too?”

“Maybe not. Perhaps they are just lost; maybe they will find their way back to the fields.”

“Let’s hope so. In any case, we cannot linger to look for them. You still need to get to a healer as soon as possible.”

“I’m fine, Javi”, Yuzuru protested, but then mellowed. “We will go now, of course.”

Yuzuru didn’t let Javier place him in front this time.

“I can ride behind you, and hold Hope’s reins. I’m doing better now. You just focus on the road ahead, look out for danger.”

“Are you implying that I’m distracted by you? Or maybe you don’t like being held by me?” Javier couldn’t help teasing him.

Yuzuru shot him a quick look, and Javier almost bit his tongue.

“I’m sorry”, he said quickly. “You’re ill and grieving and I spoke without thinking.”

Without any further comment, Javier helped Yuzuru climb on Haru, then joined him. He noticed Yuzuru was trying to keep some distance between them, but leaning further back.

It was true, Javier reflected, as they set off. When he held Yuzuru so close against him, it was difficult not to think about it, and zone in on every blessed detail – every point of contact between them pulsing with heat and joy. To say that he was merely reassured by Yuzuru’s presence, to say that protecting him was simply fulfilling a duty he was now bound to, was simply a lie. In fact, they were both distracted by each other’s proximity.

They rode on in silence – Haru carrying Javier and Yuzuru, and Hope carrying the dead, both horses picking their way carefully through the fog. It must have been afternoon by now, yet the chilling drizzle had not let up one bit. Neither of them had eaten anything that day, but food was the last thing on Javier’s mind, and he assumed the same was true of Yuzuru. His thoughts strayed to their destination – they were going to The Fields, where people already awaited them. These people recognized Yuzuru as their prince, but Javier was a stranger to them. A stranger who came bearing bad news, trailing behind him the dead bodies of two of Yuzuru’s companions. It was easy for Javier to become lost in gloomy thoughts: What if he had not come here at all, would Koshiro and Kazuki still be alive? …..

He shrugged, as be rubbed resolutely at his tired eyes, trying to shake off the feeling of unease and guilt.

Suddenly, he became conscious of Yuzuru sagging against him. He could feel his breath on his shoulder blades, and an arm slipped tightly around his waist.

“Please, Javi. Don’t do this”, came Yuzuru’s quiet whisper.

“Do what?” Javier answered, his voice rough, aiming for a casual tone.

“I don’t know exactly what you’re thinking, but I can feel it’s causing you pain.”

“Maybe I deserve the pain,” Javier answered, thoughtlessly.

Yuzuru went still behind him, falling quiet. Javier thought that maybe he agreed with him. Now he felt merely resigned, as if he expected nothing more. He would fulfil his duty to the best of his ability, until the end, whatever that end may be. That was what he had come here to do, after all, and honour demanded that he should see it through. He would not allow anything else to touch him. It was fine, even if the shadows around him seemed to become denser, until he almost thought that it was already night.

Yuzuru reached around Javier suddenly and grabbed the reins. With a firm move, he pulled, bringing Haru to a halt. He dismounted and Javier followed, confused. He looked at Yuzuru warily, as Yuzuru turned to him slowly, eyes blazing and cheeks blotched red with fever. Yuzuru stepped impossibly close, grabbed Javier’s face in his small palms and pressed his lips to his.

Javier felt like he was burning. Yuzuru’s hands felt like they were branding him, and the touch of his lips was searing. Worry sprang up in his mind, tainting the unexpected joy. Javier let himself be kissed, touched, healed, reassured. He rested a comforting hand on Yuzuru’s waist, and answered the kiss, allowing Yuzuru to dictate the pace.

When Yuzuru finally pulled back, his breathing was shallow.

“Are you feeling better now?” he asked.

Javier couldn’t help but chuckle at that.

“Yuzu… be careful, if that’s what you offer people to make them feel better, there’s gonna be a long line of sad folks coming to see you.”

“Not people. Just you, Javi. Stop thinking bad thoughts. I care about you so much. I care about you this much.”

Javier understood: Yuzuru cared enough to delay them, to ignore the urgency of their situation for the moment, just to make Javier get out of his own head.

“I … needed this too”, Yuzuru confessed, sheepishly. “I need Javi.”

“Yuzu”, Javier exclaimed, relieved, finally enveloping him in his arms like he’d been dying to. “You only have to ask, love - you only have to ask.”

“Then I ask you this again – you must promise me – that you won’t feel guilty about things you can’t control. Don’t give in to bad thoughts that can eat you alive. People can go mad that way. And I need you safe and whole with me. I can’t do it without you, Javi.”

“Yuzuru”, Javier said, moved beyond belief, caressing Yuzuru’s cheek tenderly. “I promise.”

Yuzuru buried his head in Javier’s shoulder, tightening his arms around him. A few blissful seconds passed. The shadows around Javier seemed to dissipate. Then he realized it was not just the shadows in his mind – the misty fog had given way a little, and he could see further on the horizon. And unless his eyes were deceiving him, he could see a flash of vibrant colour.

Javier drew in a sharp breath, as he remembered Yuzuru’s words: ‘When you see purple on the horizon, it means we’re close. It’s the fields of heather.’

It seemed like a long time ago, in another world.

“Yuzu!” Javier shook him a little, and when Yuzuru looked up, he pointed: “Look!”

For a few seconds, Yuzuru stood frozen, staring in the direction that Javier was pointing, like he could not believe it. Repressing a quiet sob, he went back to the horses and rummaged into his pouch. Javier followed his movements curiously. Finally, Yuzuru extracted a black cloth, and tied it to the Hope’s harness to flutter behind them like an ominous flag. Javier understood – they were warning the people in the fields, who were on the lookout for them. He and Yuzuru climbed Haru, and they set off again.

As much as they could, they hurried. The horses were tired and overburdened, but seemed to take courage in the small change of weather. They seemed just as eager as Javier and Yuzuru to reach a proper shelter. Hope at least seemed to recognize the way because she was no longer trailing behind, but keeping pace, even moving ahead, without needing to be led by Yuzuru.

As they advanced, Javier could now see clearly what Yuzuru no doubt had already seen:

On the roof of a solitary house that marked the beginning of the fields there waved a black flag. It seemed that theirs was not the only tragedy.

“Who lives in that house?” Javier asked Yuzuru.

“Patrick”, Yuzuru answered quickly, as if he had been expecting Javier’s question. “He is our guardian of the fields. Like Keiji is our guardian of the gates, you know. Neither of them can leave their posts and neither take part in the fighting. But they couldn’t be more different. Patrick cannot fight because he has a bad leg which slows him down greatly and is in near constant pain. But he is as brave as anyone. He has seen so much destruction and violence in his life, that few things move him anymore. Please try to ignore his bluntness and sarcasm. He means no harm.”

Javier nodded:

“I’ll try not to let it get to me. But what does the black flag mean? You said before red flag means danger, so...”

“Red flag means be prepared, as the danger is still around. Black flag on Patrick’s house means there have been attacks and deaths in the village, but the danger has been pushed back for now. This is useful for us to know. Either way, we have to hurry and make it to the village by nightfall. Patrick can lend us fresh horses, while Haru and Hope rest for a while.”

Javier nodded, his stomach churning in apprehension. He had encountered unspeakable monsters, and yet he was more anxious at the moment by the way the people might see him, and judge him. But he had promised Yuzuru that he would be strong. He briefly wondered how much Yuzuru himself knew about bad thoughts and guilt that can eat you alive and make you go mad. Probably more than his fair share.

They were close now.

Javier could smell the subtle scent of heather – woody and mossy. He rested his eyes momentarily on the vibrant purple colour, stretching far in all directions.

The door of the house opened, and there was barking, and a man with a big scar on his forehead limped out to meet them.

“I told those two numbnuts not to head out alone”, he scowled at them, when they were within reach. “Fat lot good it did them! When?”

“Last night”, Yuzuru answered shortly. “Hello Patrick. This is Javier.”

A bit taken aback by the suddenness of this exchange, Javier needed a moment to react.

“Uh. Hello, I’m Javier. Good to meet you.”

Patrick merely nodded at him:

“Are you the new guy? Welcome to the madness. Don’t know what could have possibly possessed you to come, but here you are.”

“Come inside. I have more bad news.”

“We have to hurry on to the village”, Yuzuru said. “Kazuki and Koshiro deserve to be put to rest as soon as possible, their remains have already been plagued by flies all day.”

“I’ll send Takeshi ahead with their bodies. You two look like death warmed over.”

“Yuzuru has a fever”, Javier put in. “There has been an accident and he-”

“Now is not the time to coddle me”, Yuzuru interrupted. “I need to know what happened in the village; I need to know what happened to my people.”

“Hold up - your majesty”, Patrick said, ironically. “Looks like both you and I have stories to tell – we’ll tell them over dinner. I can spare you some powders for your fever, too. You’ll rest here tonight then go the village tomorrow.”

“That’s a good idea”, Javier said, suddenly realizing he was faint with hunger. “We haven’t had a chance to grab a bite today.”

“May the goddess strike me dead!” Patrick swore. “You talk sense, stranger. Come in, already! Takeshi!” he called out. “Come here! You have work to do, boy!”

Yuzuru looked like he was about to argue, but Patrick positively bellowed at him:

“One night’s delay isn’t gonna make a difference! It’s a good thing you’re safe! We were fearing the worst! Now, eat and rest, because you’re gonna need all your wits for what I’m about to tell you!” he ended, disgruntled.

Without waiting for Yuzuru to agree, Javier jumped off nimbly, and took their pouches off the horses. One of the pouches Javier was holding squealed and Javier almost dropped it in fear, before he remembered Pooh-san. The poor creature had spent the entire day in there, perhaps still fearing for its life. Javier opened the pouch and released the weasel, watching him as he scrambled off to explore and look for food, keeping wary distance from Patrick’s dog.

A boy hurried out of the house, and came up to Patrick, waiting for instructions.

“Hope and Haru-”, Yuzuru began, his voice trembling, dizzy and spent, yet stubbornly unable to relinquish his duty. He blinked slowly, tears gathering in his eyes, wary with the anticipation of yet another tragedy.

Patrick looked at him and said, more gently:

“We’ll take care of them, don’t worry. Now hurry inside, both of you. There’s cots prepared – four of them, mind you. Lay down and rest, I’ll be with you soon.”

Without waiting for an answer, Patrick turned away to speak to Takeshi. Javier took Yuzuru by the shoulders and guided him gently but firmly inside the house.

Chapter Text

As much as Javier wanted to collapse on the same cot as Yuzuru and wrap himself around him as he did back in the cave, he held back, wary of Patrick making snide comments. He couldn’t bear to hear any mocking remarks about their relationship, no matter how harmless their intent.

So he took the cot next to Yuzuru and lay down, staring at the low ceiling. It felt good to be under a proper roof, warmer than he had been in days. He was about to nod off when Patrick came in.

“Haru and Hope are fed, brushed and stabled. Takeshi just left for the village with a carriage transporting Koshiro and Kazuki’s remains. He will tell the people you are safe and will arrive tomorrow”, he informed them, as he placed some water to boil on the stove.

“Can you tell me….”, Yuzuru started.

“Not until after dinner. Oh, I almost forgot.” Patrick went into another room, and returned with a spoonful of dried herbs.

“Take these.”

“Okay”, Yuzuru agreed quickly. “But you can start telling me what happened, Patrick. The longer you delay, the worse I feel.”

Patrick nodded, then shrugged, as if he did not care much either way. He began talking as he added ingredients to the pottage he was making:

“The people from the citadel stopped by my house last week on the way to the fields. They had no incidents on the road. Well. No Wyrdexin-related incident, that is.”

“Was there something else going on?” Yuzuru predictably asked.

“Satoko had taken ill. She felt dizzy and could hold no food in. At first, I feared poison, although everyone confirmed that they shared the same supplies.” Patrick shook his head, ruefully. “I should have seen it coming. But I never imagined that Keiji would let her leave like this-”

“What?” Yuzuru raised his voice. “Is Satoko alright?”

“She’s fine”, Patrick confirmed. “She seemed to feel better once they’ve all rested. They reached the village, and a few days later, she went into labour. Koshiro and Kazuki had already left to meet you by then, or you might have found out sooner.”

Both Yuzuru and Javier looked up, startled.

“But...”, Yuzuru stammered, “but she wasn’t…”

“Well, nobody knew she was pregnant. I suspect not even Keiji. For some reason, she chose to hide it from everyone until the last moment. I suspect she and the numbnut Keiji must have argued.”

“But I saw her right before she left, I talked to her….”, Yuzuru murmured, bewildered. “How could I have missed that she was pregnant, and so far along too?”

“Large clothes?” Patrick raised an eyebrow. “Besides, Satoko is a slight woman, and pregnancy did not change her much. Anyway, I think it was a premature birth, brought on by the exertion, days spent riding on horseback, and all that.”

“Satoko...”, Yuzuru shook his head, distraught. “If Keiji really did something to upset her enough for her to want to leave the citadel despite her condition, why didn’t she come to me? We’ve known each other since childhood, why didn’t she trust me?”

Patrick threw a quick look to Javier, before returning his attention to the boiling pot which he stirred:

“Not for me to say”, he shrugged.

“Is the child alright?” Yuzuru finally asked. “They should both be taken back to the citadel to safety!”

“Well, now we come to the reason why the black flag is waving on my roof. The child was taken by the Wyrdexins the night he uttered his first scream.”

Yuzuru and Javier stared at Patrick, with similar looks of horror on their faces.

“Taken?” Yuzuru repeated, faintly.

“Yes, taken. Not devoured on the spot, as they tend to do with adults they catch unawares. Taken, like in the old days of the tributes.”

Yuzuru rubbed at his forehead, with a grimace.

“Was anyone else harmed?”

“No. Well, at least, not until today, when you brought back Koshiro and Kazuki’s dead bodies.”

“What is the meaning of this, Patrick?” Yuzuru looked up at him from his cot, almost pleadingly. “It makes no sense, I don’t understand. They come into the village to abduct a child, but leave the mother and everyone else untouched, only to disappear again, and attack us, several miles away, killing two of us. Why? Why?”

If only to prevent Yuzuru from uttering again the words ‘why was I spared?’, Javier broke in with a question:

“I’m sorry, this may sound ignorant to you”, he addressed Patrick respectfully, “but how do we know it was the Wyrdexins that took the child, if no one else was harmed and no one saw them?”

“Well, stranger, don’t you think we have ways of recognizing the actions of our biggest enemy?” Patrick began, disdainfully, only for Yuzuru to interrupt him, sharply:

“Patrick, mind your tone! I might have asked you the same question, if only I could gather all my wits.”

“Then you’re both fools”, Patrick replied, unconcernedly. “It was the sleep – Satoko was found in such a deep sleep as only the Wyrdexins can induce. She could barely be revived. When she did come to, she recounted the usual nightmare – beasts arriving, devouring everything.”

“And yet she was spared.”

“Yes”, Patrick nodded. “She has an explanation for that. She thinks the beasts are sending us a message this way. Satoko thinks she was chosen, like the mage who had the first dream, to relay the message of the Wyrdexins to the people. They want tributes again. So lives might be spared in exchange for the morsels they were denied for so long.”

“No!” Yuzuru shouted, so loudly and desperately, that it made Javier jump. “We will not have this again! Satoko’s child was not supposed to be here! No children are supposed to be out in the fields! They will not get our children!” Yuzuru stood up suddenly. “But they…. They will be destroyed, all of them! Give me a horse, Patrick! We must prepare, we will build an army and raid their nests!”

Patrick’s only reaction to Yuzuru’s ranting was to calmly put another pot to boil.

“How are you going to find their nests?” he asked.

“I don’t know, but we’ll look everywhere. We won’t stop looking until we find them!” Yuzuru answered, his voice now biting with steely resolve. “You’re with me, right, Javi?” he turned to Javier, who could only nod, startled.

“Okay”, Patrick agreed easily. “Drink this. Dinner’s almost done.”

Distracted, Yuzuru took the offered cup and gulped it down thirstily. He gave the empty cup back to Patrick, who was watching him warily, then he wanted to say something more, but it came out low and garbled. Javier looked at Yuzuru curiously, only to see him unexpectedly drop face down onto his cot, where he lay still. Although having realized what happened, Javier could not help but go and check on him. Yuzuru was sleeping peacefully. Javier arranged his limbs so that he lay comfortably, and smoothed down the hair from his forehead, looking at him with pity. Then he turned to Patrick, not knowing what to say.

Patrick shrugged.

“I’m sorry that he will miss his meal, but it’s better this way, he is much more in need of rest from his troubled mind. I was afraid he might storm out of the house into the night right now in search of Wyrdexins.”

Javier nodded, slowly. It seemed that a lot of people were at a loss on how to deal with Yuzuru’s otherworldly intensity.

“Anyway, they say it’s better to starve a fever”, Patrick went on cheerfully. “Don’t worry about Yuzuru, he’ll be fine, he’s strong.”

“I’m not worried about him”, Javier lied.

Patrick snorted.

“Come on, stranger, let’s eat.”

During their meal, Patrick questioned Javier in his blunt, no-nonsense way, and Javier found himself confessing more than he would have otherwise done, to a listener with a kinder disposition. There was something about Patrick’s jaded attitude that invited honesty, as it seemed to preclude any judgement. Javier soon told him more about his hopes and fears tha n he had even told Yuzuru.

“The binding ritual – did you take it voluntarily?” Patrick, asked, curiously.

“Of course, I did”, Javier answered, surprised.

“Then you are foolish”, Patrick mused, matter-of-factly. “Its effects may be more than you bargained for.”

“If that means I can better understand and help Yuzuru, then that’s fine with me”, Javier said defiantly.

“You already feel its effects, don’t you?” Patrick inquired, shrewdly.

“We both feel it”, Javier confirmed.

“What’s it like?” Patrick asked. “Caring for someone like that?”

Javier s miled ruefully .

“It’s unlike anything I have ever felt before, even for my family, or any of my sweethearts. It’s like I always carry Yuzuru in my heart and mind – like I am two people at once.”

Patrick drew in a sharp breath. He glanced out the window at the darkness, and muttered something. To Javier’s ears, it sounded like:

“This can’t end well.”

Javier was too tired to argue, or ask for clarification. With a full belly, he now longed for sleep. Patrick nodded towards his cot .

“Sleep with no fear”, he told Javier. “My house is as safe as can be. Pain keeps me awake often and my slumber is very light. Nothing crawls in without me knowing about it. I’ll wake you both at the break of dawn.”

Yuzuru woke up the next day, apparently strengthened by the long sleep, and well enough to feel murderous about his deception. He ate standing, wolfing down his food hungrily, but still unwilling to linger more than strictly necessary.

“I would deal with you harshly, Patrick, if you weren’t under the Queen’s direct protection.” The bite of his words was somewhat lost by the fact that he was munching around them.

Patrick merely laughed, carelessly.

“Your horses are ready for you,” he said. “You’re welcome”, he added, on a long-suffering tone.

“How long until we reach The Fields?” Javier asked.

It was a bright morning, fresh after the rain, and the skies were a clear blue. Javier felt like whatever awaited them, even a march into the dangerous unknown, he would face it head on. On such a day, it felt like being still alive was a blessing.

“You’re already there”, Patrick answered, “our fields begin to stretch from here, and further on towards the feet of the mountain. If you mean the settlement, that’s no more than an hour’s gallop from here. Two hours if you ride easy.”

Javier shook Patrick’s hand in farewell and mounted Haru.

They set off at full speed, Yuzuru seemingly intent on not wasting a single second.

Soon Javier could see that the fields of heather gave way to crop fields. Some of them held plentiful crops, but there were also large patches that were left barren. Javier wondered if this was because there were not enough people to work the land. The fact that the Yilians did not stand on ceremony and everyone worked and fought together made even more sense now.

The settlement soon loomed into view. There was smoke rising towards the sky, as if from a large fire that was allowed to die out - it must have been from Koshiro and Kazuki’s funeral pyre. They had missed the ceremony, Javier realized with some sadness. He would have liked to have said his last farewell to the two boys; even if he had only known them briefly, he still mourned their loss.

Yuzuru rode into the village like a storm. Javier noticed that the people who welcomed him seemed at once happy to see him and yet fearful, as if intimidated or wary of him. Yuzuru’s intensity inspired reverence and respect, but also apprehension.

After paying his respects to Kazuki and Koshiro’s graves, Yuzuru at once sought out Satoko. Javier was not present during the conversation between the two old friends. He was directed instead to his hut that would serve as his home for the period spent in the fields. It was small and cozy, though sparsely furnished. The large windows welcomed in plenty of sun, providing good visibility in all directions. Javier asked about working the fields – he longed for something commonplace to do, something mundane yet worthwhile. Compared to the futility of hunting Wyrdexins, the hard manual labour of weeding and planting crops seemed like a vacation to him. But he was told to wait for Yuzuru’s decision. Many already suspected that Yuzuru would not content himself with simply defending the fields after the Wyrdexins’ latest provocation.

“We will raid their nests,” Yuzuru spoke that late morning, in front of a hastily gathered assembly. “I won’t force anyone to come with me, I know full well the horror of being forced into such danger against your will. But I, at least, will go. It is something that I must do. In fact, it’s been a long time coming.”

“This is suicide”, someone dared to say.

“Even if you find their nests, you are walking to your death!”

“Be that as it may”, Yuzuru answered calmly, “I simply feel that it is my fate to do it, and everything that happens only pushes me forward towards the inevitable.”

An older man turned to his neighbour , addressing him in a loud whisper:

“It’s like that time with Shuzo, it’s like hearing his father….”

Having heard him, Yuzuru stared him down, as he replied:

“Perhaps my father also recognized necessity when he saw it. And we are now more well-prepared than they were then.”

“We’re also fewer”, someone put in, maliciously.

Yuzuru raised his voice:

“We will use fire to our advantage. We will also burn pine wood to make tar and pour it hot in large quantities over their nests. Even if it doesn’t kill them outright, it will trap them inside.”

The people murmured to themselves, still looking dubious, so Javier felt that it was time to show some support.

“A lake of tar”, he said. “That’s ingenious. It’s bound to work.”

“-if we even manage to find their nests”, the older man who spoke first argued, tiredly. “I remember this was the talk back then, as well.”

“And yet you gave chase to them, and saved my life”, Yuzuru interrupted, fiercely.

“And your father died for it”, the older man replied, without backing down. “As did many others.”

“So then”, Yuzuru addressed him with a sad smile, “if now the time has come for me to give up the life that I was unexpectedly granted, and maybe save others, why do you stand in my way, Tsuzuki-sensei?”

“I do not stand in your way”, the old man replied. “I just don’t want you rushing headlong into danger like a rabbit instead of avoiding it like a cunning fox.”

Yuzuru considered this.

“No. The time for avoidance is long gone.”

Satoko came forward and bowed. Her face was impassive, but her voice betrayed her emotion:

“Please. I volunteer to go ahead as a scout to find their nests. Once I do, I will return to you with the precise location so we can plan the strike.”

“I volunteer as well”, another woman came up, and held Satoko’s hand securely. She nodded and squeezed back.

“Me too”, a youngster’s voice came, and soon others joined in.

“Some of them are so young”, Javier said to Yuzuru in a low voice. Then looking around, he realized. “And the rest are at least some decades older. I see no one that’s our age.”

“That’s because there is no one my age left”, Yuzuru murmured, “except Keiji, Kaori and Satoko.” And suddenly Javier understood, stricken. For a long time, people did not have children in fear of them being taken as tributes. Even after Yuzuru survived his ordeal, at the age of five, and tributes stopped being paid, it took a while until they felt confident enough to begin having children again.

“And me!” a girl who could not be more than fourteen spoke up, excitedly.

“Thank you, Mone”, Yuzuru told her seriously, “but if we take the entire village with us, we might as well say goodbye to secrecy. Javier and I will go; Kaori and Satoko, you will come with us.”

Javier nodded at Yuzuru, but Satoko looked unsettled.

“I don’t think you should go”, she told Yuzuru. “if something happens to you, what shall we tell the queen, and who will lead the people?”

“Well, I don’t think you should have come to the fields pregnant”, Yuzuru shot back. “If something happens to you, what shall I tell Keiji?”

Satoko shook her head.

“That’s not fair”, she hissed. “You always take Keiji’s side, and then ask why don’t I come to you when I have a problem. Well, this is why”, she pouted, crossing her arms.

Javier could hardly believe that what should have been a serious talk of tactics and planning for the road ahead, had devolved into a childish argument. He wondered whether or not to step in, when the woman named Kaori did just that.

“Why don’t you two stop arguing, it’s really tiresome”, she said, on a bored tone. “Do we set off right away? Do we take horses with us? How much food do we need?” she rattled off on her fingers the important points of the matter.

Yuzuru sighed heavily. For a moment, he looked incredibly young and vulnerable, fighting against all odds to show a wisdom and strength far beyond his years. Javier looked at his small pale face and remembered that he was also battling the remnants of a fever, and long overdue in seeing a healer . He didn’t say this out loud, however, as he did not want to draw attention to Yuzuru’s weakness, seeing as some people were already eyeing him with distrust. Javier merely wrapped an arm around Yuzuru’s waist, and squeezed comfortingly.

“We will discuss these things and decide together”, Javier said, looking at Yuzuru for approval.

Yuzuru gave a brief nod. Kaori watched them carefully for a moment, then shrugged in agreement.

“Better a short delay than ill-equipped”, she said cheerfully. “I have some matters I need to attend to before we leave, anyway.”

Without waiting for an answer, she bowed and walked away. Satoko looked askance at Javier for a moment, opened her mouth to say something, but then seemed to decide against it. With a small bow and a smile, she took her leave as well.

“Come on”, Javier whispered in Yuzuru’s ear. “You need to see a healer. You can’t set off on a journey again so soon without knowing you’re fit and well.”

“I am well”, Yuzuru protested. He leaned against Javier, tilting his head, so he could whisper back at him: “But I will see a healer. Thank you for looking after me, Javi.”

Yuzuru’s small grateful smile was enough for Javier to feel light and even cheerful, despite the uncertainty that awaited.

“This isn’t just a courtesy call, is it?” the woman asked Yuzuru, smiling knowingly, when she saw him enter her hut, along with Javier. “What is it this time?”

“Nanami-sensei”, Yuzuru acknowledged her with a deep bow.

Even knowing the Yilians did not stand on ceremony, Javier was surprised to hear the middle aged healer reprimand Yuzuru like he was a wayward child. As if she could read his thoughts, Nanami said to Javier:

“I’ve been tending to this one’s cuts and bruises since he was tiny.”

Javier lit up.

“Oh, did he get cut and bruised often, then?” he asked, grinning, and got an elbow in his shins from Yuzuru for his efforts.

“More than you can imagine”, Nanami said, long-sufferingly. “I’ve never known a child more incapable of standing still. So what is it now?”

“Not just a bruise, I’m afraid”, Javier answered. Then he told her about the accident and Yuzuru’s blow to the head, and his resulting sickness and fever.

Yuzuru allowed Javier to speak for him, sitting quietly on the edge of the bed. When Javier finished, Nanami shook her head, exasperated.

“That weasel of yours, always causing some trouble… Come here, let me look.”

Yuzuru lifted his fringe, so Nanami could examine his temple – the wound was beginning to scar.

“It looks clean, doesn’t look infected”, she murmured, feeling his forehead at the same time, “but just to make sure…”

She turned and began mixing several powders, grinding them in a mortar with a pestle.

“Of course, the best remedy for this kind of thing – like for most things, actually, is a nice long rest. Our bodies have a great capacity for self healing, you know”, she added, looking between Yuzuru and Javier. “But of course, we must listen to what they tell us, and not go against their wishes.”

“Rest is a luxury I can’t afford right now”, Yuzuru answered shortly.

“I know”, Nanami sighed.

“Has Satoko come to see you?” Yuzuru asked her.

“You mean, about her condition? Only when the pains of childbirth started. I did the best I could to save the boy’s life – it was born premature, you know, and very small, almost too small to survive. But then he started to cry just like any baby, and Satoko nursed him, and I thought the danger had passed. But then….”, she trailed off.

Yuzuru nodded.

“You did all you could”, he reassured her.

“I don’t have any more insight into why she hid her condition from anyone”, Nanami went on. “If she had told people she was pregnant, she wouldn’t have been allowed to come to the fields, and both she and the child would have now been safe in the citadel.”

“When I talked to Satoko just now, she told me anything was better than Keiji’s constant anxiety and feelings of doom. I can’t say I don’t understand her, but still – what she did was reckless,” Yuzuru said, rubbing at his forehead.

Nanami slapped his hand away.

“Don’t touch that.”

“It itches.”

“This will help.”

She finished her concoction and began applying it to Yuzuru’s fresh scar .

“Lie down a while, while it works its way through the skin. I will also prepare a warm potion for you to drink – it will help with the fever, and it will give you energy.”

“Good”, Yuzuru mumbled. “I will need it.”

“Don’t talk now, just rest.” Nanami turned to Javier: “So, Javier – have I pronounced it right? - how about you? Are you well?”

“Well enough”, Javier shrugged. “I’m just glad Yuzuru is doing better.”

“Mhm”, Nanami said, unconvinced, and came up to him for a closer examination.

“I don’t like these dark circles under your eyes, you look exhausted and spent.” Ignoring Javier’s dismissive gesture, she went on: “I will also make you a potion. You can’t run only on feelings.”

Choosing to ignore the latter part of Nanami’s statement, Javier bowed deeply to her.

“Thank you”, he said. “You are very kind.”

“It’s sort of my job, you know?” Nanami smiled. “But it’s a really difficult task, almost impossible – keeping all the people healthy in body and sane in mind. Still, I do what I can.”

“Are you the only healer in the village?” Javier asked.

She nodded.

“I have apprentices, though. Some of them are well on their way to becoming accomplished healers. Koshiro was one of them-”, she stopped abruptly, and turned away, with a muffled sob. “Excuse me, I-”

“I’m sorry”, Javier said, lowering his eyes. “I wish this never happened.”

Nanami nodded sharply, rubbing at her eyes, then turned around, with a strained smile.

“As do I. If wishes were fishes, we’d have them fried.”

She laughed wetly, and stirred the potions. An invigorating scent permeated the small room, and Javier inhaled it greedily, feeling his spirits rise a little.

Nanami poured the potions into two cups. Javier accepted his own cup of warm fragrant drink, with a grateful bow, and sat down on the bed next to Yuzuru. The two of them drank with slow sips, in comfortable silence, their shoulders brushing.

Javier found himself wishing that he and Yuzuru could be here just to work the fields and then return home in the evening to share a warm meal and sit together like this. Previously when he had been trying to settle down with someone, these creature comforts used to bore him, and a part of him always longed for adventure. Now he felt like maybe such a life was truly worth living. Javier would welcome it gladly, if only Yuzuru was there to share it with him.

But for now he could only enjoy this brief respite before they headed back into the unknown.

“We need to hurry now”, Yuzuru told Javier after they said goodbye to Nanami. “There’s a lot to be done, and it’s already noon.”

“Yes”, Javier agreed. “It looks like they’re all still gathered there, waiting for your decision.”

Yuzuru looked up confused, towards where Javier was pointing. A large crowd was indeed gathered in the market square, even larger than the one Yuzuru had previously addressed . Among them, Javier noticed Satoko and Kaori, already mounted, and leading two horses by their reins. As they approached, he recognized them as Haru and Hope .

“What’s happening here?” Yuzuru asked, frowning.

“We took the liberty to make some arrangements”, Kaori told him. “After all, we know the drill. We packed food, water, and spare clothing. I thought we could use the horses, too, since they can help us cover at least a bit of distance faster than we would make it on foot. If they end up being more trouble than they’re worth, we can always send them back. So if you’ve decided in which direction to go, we’re ready and can set off anytime.”

Yuzuru looked at her, mouth agape.

“You… did all this… just now?”

“Of course”, Kaori shrugged. “Shouldn’t I have?”

“I – I am grateful”, Yuzuru stammered. “But it was my responsibility...”

“You have friends, Yuzuru”, Kaori interrupted him, gently. “It’s alright to rely on them sometimes, you know.”

Yuzuru opened his mouth to argue, but then he relented. His features softened in a bright smile:

“Thank you, Kaori.”

She smiled back at him:

“Don’t mention it! Now I’ll let you make a speech or say your goodbyes, or whatever, so these people don’t think I’m trying to usurp your role.” Kaori made a face, and Yuzuru rolled his eyes at her.

Yuzuru turned to those gathered to see them off, his smile slowly fading.

“I know some of you doubt our endeavour”, he addressed them. “But I promise you that no effort will be spared to find these beasts.”

“Rather promise us that you will all return safely”, a woman’s voice called out from the crowd.

Yuzuru frowned, wavering on how to reply. He bit the inside of his lip, and Javier wondered if he remembered Kazuki and Koshiro.

It was Kaori who saved him, again.

“Who can promise that it will rain tomorrow? Not even the goddess can say. We will do our best.”

It was back to camping out in the open, Javier realized with some resignation, and half-regretting the hut he left behind in the village, with its comfortable bed.

At least the weather appeared to favour them, getting steadily warmer. However, when Javier mentioned it, Yuzuru was quick to point out the fact that the warmer it got, the risk of Wyrdexins roaming about was also higher.

That day, they covered quite a bit of ground spurring their horses on. Yuzuru wanted to get as close as they could to the edge of the woods, where he suspected the Wyrdexin nests would be.

They stopped only after it got dark, took a bit e to eat, and huddled together for safety. They drew lots to decide the order in which they would keep guard, and Javier drew first. The others fell asleep quickly, exhausted. Javier sat cross-legged on his blanket , peering ahead into the night, with only the light of the moon to help him distinguish shapes moving in the dark . Even though tired, Javier felt strangely uneasy and restless . It might have been the full weight of the recent events finally catching up with him, or their deliberate, some would say suicidal venture into danger; or maybe Javier just felt the air change with something unsettling as they drew closer to the forest.

As he was wont to do when he was feeling out of sorts, Javier took out the dagger from his belt to play with it. The familiarity of the actions helped soothe him, as it always did; but then just as he was starting to relax , he saw a sliver of something wriggling through the grass, just at the edge of his vision. He turned sharply towards the movement , expecting a snake.

It was Pooh-san, Yuzuru’s pet weasel, running demented, but seemingly with a purpose. Javier felt a chill run through him, without knowing why. He could not have explained his actions, other than his previous sense of unease guiding him, when he decided to follow Pooh-san. Javier soon realized the creature had caught a mouse, but instead of eating it, he was allowing it to dangle from his mouth, dripping blood. Javier thought he might be looking for a place to hide it, as sated animals might do, to save their food for later. But Pooh-san was merely ambling about with it in his mouth, seemingly in a random fashion. Occasionally he stopped, and its fangs tore into the mouse as if it meant to eat it, but then stopped, and moved on. Over and over, until Javier realized the weasel was repeating the same motions while running around in a circle, with their camp at the epicenter. Javier was confused about his actions, so he decided to approach further, even at the risk of alarming the creature. And then, suddenly he noticed the blood. The mangled mouse was dripping blood all along the weasel’s footsteps, and whenever Pooh-san stopped, digging his fangs into the mouse, even more blood dripped out. Javier’s mind flashed back to his first day at the citadel, Keiji’s unrestrained panic at the sight of a mere drop of blood, and he felt horror creep up on him. Was Pooh-san unwittingly drawing the Wyrdexins to them? But if so, why was he behaving so strangely – as if purposefully ? It was too much, even as a part of Javier thought he might be losing his mind to suspect a weasel of conspiring against him, in that moment he was struck by the terrible possibility that Pooh-san was helping the Wyrdexins find them. The thought filled him with despair. Everything seemed set against them, even the natural world – even Yuzuru’s own pet secretly working against him. But how – and why, could such a thing be?

Javier was so upset that a part of him wanted to kill the creature outright. But he thought better of it. First things first – they must leave the contaminated area, and put it as far behind them as possible, before Wyrdexins caught the scent of blood. And Pooh-san must be stopped from causing further damage. Javier did not attempt to tackle the weasel himself, instead he turned on his heels, intending to wake up Yuzuru and the others. He gasped when he realized Yuzuru was already awake and standing not two feet behind him.

“How – how long have you been standing there?” Javier asked.

Yuzuru merely watched him. Javier could not see his face clearly in the darkness.

“I don’t know”, he finally answered. “I woke up, and couldn’t find you, so I got up to look for you. I’ve been following you for a while.”

“And I was following him”, Javier pointed an accusing finger at the weasel. “Do you know what he’s been doing?”

Yuzuru nodded slowly.

“Yes.”

“Look at all that blood!” Javier shouted. “And he’s not stopping! I bet once this mouse is all dried out, he’ll catch another just to bleed it dry in the same way!”

“Yes”, Yuzuru answered, calmly. “Pooh-san is setting up a trap for us.”

“That’s right! Wait… you knew about this?” Javier asked, thoroughly confused.

“I began to suspect it”, Yuzuru sighed. “It seemed incredible, and yet, it was the only explanation that made sense for his behaviour.”

“So he’s done it before?”

Yuzuru nodded again.

Javier remembered seeing Pooh-san run around outside after they emerged from the ordeal in the cave. At that time, he thought the weasel had run to escape the danger he had sensed before they did, but what if he was in fact responsible for drawing the Wyrdexins to their location? What if Kazuki and Koshiro were dead because of Pooh-san?

“It’s not his fault”, Yuzuru said, as if guessing Javier’s thought process. “He’s just a poor animal. I told you the Wyrdexins have the power to influence minds. Pooh-san is behaving this way against his will, he doesn’t know why he does it, except that he is compelled to do it.”

“Compelled or not”, Javier said, darkly, as he removed his dagger from his belt, “if he keeps putting us in danger, he cannot be allowed to continue.”

“Javi, no!” Yuzuru hissed at him. “No! I will take him, put him in my pouch, he can do no mischief there!”

Javier watched with narrowed eyes as Yuzuru approached Pooh-san and coaxed him to let go of the dead mouse. The creature’s mouth and fur were bloody, and Yuzuru started cleaning it as best as he could, while reprimanding his pet. After Yuzuru had placed Pooh-san inside his pouch and looked back up, Javier said, coldly:

“We need to leave immediately. We can’t stay here, we’re surrounded by a circle of blood. I’ll wake Satoko and Kaori.”

Without waiting for Yuzuru to reply, he turned around and headed back to their small camp.

Kaori and Satoko were not happy to be awakened in the dead of night. Javier merely told them there had been some unforeseen danger and they needed to be on the move. On seeing Yuzuru making his way towards them, Javier added, perhaps a little cruelly, that Yuzuru will explain it better than he can.

“There’s blood on the ground around our camp”, Yuzuru said shortly, in answer to their inquisitive looks, as he helped pack their things. “It may attract Wyrdexins to us, so we need to leave quickly and find a safer place.”

“Fresh blood?” Kaori asked, disbelievingly, rubbing at her eyes. “And we didn’t notice it?”

Satoko looked from Yuzuru to Javier, lips pursed. However, just as she had done earlier, in the village, she made no comment. Wordlessly, she turned and began packing up her blankets .

And then, abruptly – the terror started.

Wyrdexins unexpectedly rushed upon them from the darkness, attacking with horrible speed. They had no time to retreat or talk to each other – they could do nothing but fiercely defend themselves.

Wielding both dagger and spear, Javier hacked indiscriminately at whatever came near – limbs, wings, tails, antennae, even the hard shell, without any strategy or finesse, but the principles that Yuzuru had taught him were still somewhere in the back of his mind, serving as an unconscious guide. His fighting, fuelled by the basic survival instinct rather than any actual hope of defeating his enemies , eventually bought Javier a pause – a well-deserved lull in the attack, during which he could gather his wits and assess the situation. Around him Wyrdexins crawled with hacked limbs, or stumbled, bleeding from wounds in their sensitive eyes. Javier tried to give as many of them the final blow, until he made sure they would meet their end swiftly . Meanwhile, his eyes scanned the battlefield for a sign of the others.

“Yuzuru!” he shouted, not caring if he drew more Wyrdexins to him. “Kaori! Satoko!”

No one answered his call, and Javier squinted desperately in the darkness. A fire – he needed to make a fire. It would both help them fend off the attack, a s well as provide more visibility. Hurriedly, without letting go of his weapons, he crawled towards the remains of the evening’s fire, and attempted to light it. As Javier was momentarily distracted, he did not notice a creature crawl up behind him, except when he felt the sharp f angs sink into his shoulde r . For a moment, the pain made him drop his weapons, and his vision blur red . He would have been dead, except in that moment there was a desperate scream, followed by a blow, and Javier felt the fangs release him. He fell forward, onto the remains of the fire he had thankfully not been able to light yet. As quickly as he could, he turned around, and saw Yuzuru struggle with the monster. Yuzuru was weaponless, as he had used his spear to pierce the jaw of the monster in that decisive moment, saving Javier’s life. However, he had no time to retrieve it, before the monster knocked him to the ground. The Wyrdexin’s jaws may have been ripped open and bleeding, but it still had its sharp scorpion tail. It attacked Yuzuru, trying to stab him with it, while Yuzuru twisted on the ground to avoid it. His right arm was bleeding, but he moved deftly.

The sight of Yuzuru still breathing and fighting for his life gave Javier an unexpected surge of strength and bravery. As long as the Wyrdexin attacked, it had to see. If it had to see, it could not retreat its head into the hard shell, which left his vulnerable bulbous eyes exposed . It was risky doing it like this, but Yuzuru’s life was at stake. Javier gave a roar, and, gathering his weapons, he jumped onto the monster’s back. Once there he quickly aimed his spear at the bulging eyes and rammed it straight through them, while trying to block the monster’s attack that was now aimed at him, using just his dagger. The deadly needle came within Javier’s range, it came so close it brushed against his cheek, but then just as Javier stared death in the face, the monster underneath him shuddered, and bled its last, toppling down in a heap. Yuzuru gave a cry as he was crushed underneath the weight of the carcass, and was still.

Javier retrieved his spear and jumped down, trembling from head to toe, now that the pressing danger was momentarily averted, praying to the gods of his land, and the Yilian goddess and whatever other gods may listen, that Yuzuru’s body was not broken by that dreadful weight. Straining with effort, he heaved the Wyrdexin’s body off Yuzuru. He retrieved Yuzuru’s spear, holding it with his own, telling himself Yuzuru will still be needing it. Then he kneeled, and calle d Yuzuru’s name softly, like recalling him from a dream. He touch ed his face gently, but did not dare to move him, lest it did more harm than good. Bent over Yuzuru, Javier forgot momentarily about the danger, as he watched and listened carefully for any sign of life in him.

As he was focusing on Yuzuru , Javier suddenly heard a groan from behind him and turned, stricken. He had almost forgotten about Kaori and Satoko. Guiltily, he took up his weapons and was ready to call out again, when he heard a whisper :

“Javier – I’m here – I can see you but I …. can’t move. Come carefully, watch out in case there’s more of them around…”

Javier recognized the strained whisper as belonging to Satoko. He did as he was told, moving warily in the direction of her voice . Soon he came across Satoko lying on her side, bleeding heavily from her right leg and hip.

“We have to get out of here”, she said to him urgently when he knelt down beside her, tearing a piece of his shirt to press on her wounds. “You’re injured too”, she said, and Javier remembered his shoulder, and with the memory, the pain returned tenfold. He groaned, and tried to clear his mind, but his thoughts were frightened, muddled. “Listen”, Satoko went on, “they’re laying low for now but I’m sure they’re still around. Maybe they’re waiting for us to get weaker so they can attack us without us fighting back.”

Javier’s head was throbbing. He put a hand on his forehead, and it returned bloody. He had not even realized when that injury happened, but now he became aware of the blood pouring down his face. He must have looked a sight. No wonder he couldn’t think clearly.

“Where is Kaori?” he slurred, and became even more frightened when he realized his tongue felt leaden in his mouth. Soon speaking would become a problem.

“She is here”, Satoko pointed to her left, and Javier squinted, relieved to see her shape close by. “She is unconscious, but I think she’s still alive”, Satoko went on. “Listen, you’re the only one that can move. When you’re ready, I will call the horses – they must have fled when the Wyrdexins came upon us, but they can’t be far away – if at least two of them come, it’s alright, and you need to somehow get the four of us on their backs. Once we’re mounted, the horses will know what to do – they’re trained to ride to the nearest shelter.”

“But…”, Javier stuttered, his voice breaking amid shivers, “if you whistle, won’t that alert the Wyrdexins too?”

“Yes”, Satoko answered, “maybe. That’s why you’ll need to be fast.”

Javier laughed, a creaking, desperate sound.

“I can’t be fast…. Satoko, I can barely move, I can barely see…”

“You have to”, Satoko hissed, fiercely. “Look – help me up - if I can stand, maybe I can balance on my left side, and if the horse comes close, maybe I can pull myself up and help you lift Kaori in the saddle with me. But I can’t help you with Yuzuru.”

As usual, the mention of Yuzuru was like a flash of lighting through Javier’s mind. He blinked, breathed deeply , and gathered himself.

“Let’s do this”, he nodded, with as much determination as he could muster. He took Satoko by the shoulders and pulled her up. Fortunately, she was very light. With a grimace of pain, she managed to balance her weight on her uninjured side. She nodded at Javier, who nodded back. Then she put two fingers in her mouth, and whistled loudly, like Javier had seen Yuzuru do. Rustles were heard through the grass, before the sound of hooves, and both Satoko and Javier clenched their hands on their weapons, ready to defend themselves until their last breath. But whether the Wyrdexins were incapacitated by the blows, or perhaps frightened by the fierceness of their defense, they held back for now. Javier almost wept with joy when Haru and Hope, along with Satoko and Kaori’s horses, stepped up next to them from the gloom, neighing and trembling with fear, but still answering the call. Javier helped Satoko climbed on Haru, and then lifted Kaori’s unconscious form in front of her on the saddle. Satoko held on to her, and smiled at Javier, gratefully.

Javier smiled back, pleased and relieved that they had managed it.

“Go now”, he told her. “We’ll be right behind you.”

Satoko appeared to hesitate, as if she wanted to make sure, but at that moment, there was a sudden movement in the bushes behind them. Two Wyrdexins half flew, half jumped with their monstrous leap, wings flapping uselessly behind them. Haru was spooked, and neighing in terror, set off at full speed, carrying Satoko and Kaori away. Javier could only pray they would be carried to safety. As for him, he thought for sure this was the end of the line. He had no energy left to fight two beasts at once. He closed his eyes in defeat, not wanting to stare their ugliness in the face at the time of death. And then, a moment after, Javier opened his eyes slowly, to shrieks and sounds of ripped flesh. Only he was not the one ripped to pieces. Satoko and Kaori’s horses were the prey, and were now ripped to shreds and devoured where they stood.

Javier collapsed to the ground, faint with terror, absurdly tortured at being granted another brief reprieve, and assailed by the guilt that they had called the horses to their deaths . He had no thoughts of survival any longer, as he was sure that they would be coming after him next. And for Yuzuru… Yuzuru. Javier now realized that, even if he had no hope of survival, he still had one final wish.

Blindly, Javier turned, and started to crawl slowly through the grass, hoping that his movements might pass unnoticed while the creatures feasted. The blood was getting in his eyes and his entire body hurt with each torturous push forward. And still, he crawled towards where Yuzuru lay. All he knew was that he needed to reach that motionless figure lying a few feet away, if only to die next to him. He only needed to reach him. Javier’s only wish in that moment was to escape the Wyrdexins’ claws and fangs long enough to touch Yuzuru’s face one more time, be it silent and still.

Javier was so focused on Yuzuru that he did not see – until the last moment, what would be his salvation. There, next to Yuzuru, stood Hope. She had not fallen prey to the Wyrdexins, not did she flee. She was there, hooves beating the ground nervously, and snorting impatiently at Yuzuru’s face, as if compelling him to get up and take the reins. Javier gasped, feeling tears sting his eyes. Like the fortuitously named horse, hope was reawakened in Javier’s heart, not just to die by Yuzuru, but to live. Forgoing discretion in favour of one last burst of desperate speed, he stood up and sprinted the last few steps towards Yuzuru. Painstakingly, he took him in his arms, and heaved him on Hope’s back. He then climbed behind him, sloppily, as fast as he could manage it , without looking back to check on what the Wyrdexins were doing. Javier’s vision was slowly beginning to darken, and he realized that soon he would lose consciousness. With a last ditch effort, Javier grabbed onto Yuzuru and tied them together with the reins, as tightly as he could, hoping that would be enough to keep them from falling off the horse, but then had no more strength left to whistle. Pleadingly, he caressed Hope’s mane, and whispered: “Now, Hope, run! Take your master to safety! Take us back!” Then Javier fell forwards in the saddle, in a dead faint.

Javier briefly awoke some time later confused, to hear the wind rushing madly in his ears. The horse was running fast, carrying the m away from danger. The weight of Yuzuru against him was warm and reassuring. It was close to dawn. Javier was too dizzy and weak from his wounds to keep awake for too long, so he surrendered again to unconsciousness, but not before he saw, as if through a haze, what seemed to be like an oasis of safety before his eyes: Patrick’s house.

Chapter Text

Javier woke up, his mouth dry and his head throbbing. He reached a hand to his forehead and felt it was heavily bandaged. He groaned, and stirred uncomfortably. He needed water like air, but he didn’t think he could move, or speak.

A silhouette limped heavily towards him from the other side of the room. Javier blinked sluggishly, trying to focus.

It was Satoko. Bending over Javier, she asked anxiously:

“How are you feeling?”

“Mnnn”, Javier managed. “W-water.”

“Lay still. I’ll bring it to you.”

She limped away, then returned shortly with a jug of water and a cup.

“Drink this first”, she said, handing him the cup. “Patrick said I should give it to you when you woke up. Then you can have as much water as you like.”

Javier nodded and sat up dizzily. He chugged the bitter liquid in the cup with a grimace, and washed it down with plenty of water. He sighed deeply, feeling a little strength and clarity return to him. Satoko took the jug and cup away, and Javier looked around. He was lying on a cot, and Yuzuru and Kaori were lying in cots next to him. An empty cot next to Kaori was probably Satoko’s. Javier reached out, pressing a single finger to Yuzuru’s outstretched arm, gently. Yuzuru felt warm, and he looked peaceful, like he was simply resting. Javier felt reassured by the touch, and he didn’t want to wake him, so he contented himself to simply watch him.

He heard Satoko returning, and abruptly looked away, sheepish at being caught.

Satoko gave him a pale smile.

“I wanted to tell you”, she said, “– you’re good for him. I worried about Yuzuru for a long time, like a big sister whose little brother always got himself into trouble. But when I see him with you, I feel at peace. I feel that I can trust you, even if I don’t know you. Perhaps it was fate that sent you to us – to him.”

Javier smiled a little awkwardly, not knowing what to reply to that.

“What about you?” he asked, instead. “What will you do now?”

Satoko’s smile faltered and faded:

“I don’t know”, she said. “My life isn’t over so I guess that means I have to go on fighting.”

Javier wanted to reply in some reassuring manner, but just then, the door to the hut opened, and Patrick came in, after wiping his feet fastidiously. Seeing them both awake, he said loudly, in his usual abrupt manner:

“Hello, you two. Nice to see you up and about. Satoko, you should know I sent word to Keiji: Your child is dead, and his mother is wounded. He can decide what to do now, if he wants to stay in the citadel and hide his sorry ass, or if he wants to own up to his part in this whole business.”

Satoko pursed his lips.

“You shouldn’t have done that without asking me.”

“Too bad”, Patrick countered, “I already did.”

He shrugged off his coat, and came closer.

“Now – will any of you care to explain to me what happened last night?”

Javier froze, remembering suddenly the incident that started it all.

“Patrick”, he said, slowly, “where are Yuzuru’s travel clothes, his pouch…?”

Patrick lifted an eyebrow at him.

“They were all bloody, I had to have them washed.”

“And what about Pooh-san, Yuzuru’s pet?”

“Well, I didn’t wash them with the animal inside, if that’s what you’re suggesting”, Patrick snorted.

“Where is he now?” Javier insisted.

Patrick stared at him blankly.

“Who?”

“Pooh-san!” Javier replied, impatiently.

Patrick raised an eyebrow at him.

“ Don’t you think I have better things to do than keep track of that bloody weasel?” he deadpanned. “Now, I know you were hit in the head, Javier, but just try to focus. We have important matters to discuss.”

“That’s exactly what I’m trying to do”, Javier huffed, getting increasingly agitated.

“Did you drink your powder?” Patrick asked, like he was dealing with a wayward child.

“He did”, Satoko spoke for him. “There may be something to what he’s saying, Patrick. Before the Wyrdexins swarmed us last night, you said we were in danger and we had to move”, she addressed Javier. “You also said that Yuzuru will be able to explain it better. What did you mean by that?”

“Well?” Patrick chimed in. “Yuzuru hasn’t regained consciousness yet, so I guess it’s on you to explain, Javier.”

Javier took a deep breath, and tried to be as coherent as possible:

“Right. I know this will sound crazy and you will probably think I was hit in the head and lost my marbles. But it was Pooh-san who put us in danger by bleeding a mouse dry around our camp. This was not the first time he had done it, either. Yuzuru pretty much confirmed it to me.”

Even Patrick fell silent upon hearing this, for once devoid of a snarky reply.

“But… why?” Satoko asked, after a while.

“I have no idea”, Javier answered. “Yuzuru thinks it has something to do with the mind control the Wyrdexins exercise over other creatures. In any case, he did not do anything about it.”

“That’s not like him”, Patrick frowned.

“It is like him”, Satoko contradicted him. “Pooh-san is very dear to him, and he wouldn’t want to hurt him, regardless of what he had done.”

“But - with everything that’s at stake! Putting his own people in danger!” Patrick’s voice rose in anger.

“People’s minds work in mysterious ways”, Satoko answered vaguely. “Especially when it comes to people and things they care about,” she added on a low voice.

Patrick shook his head, still swallowed up in his own anger:

“If word of this were to get out…,” he barked.

“But it won’t… get out, right?” Javier pleaded. “I told you this in confidence, and there is no reason to tell anyone about this. What’s done is done, now we just have to make sure it does not happen again. We’ll just lock up the weasel in a cage where he can make no more trouble for us.”

“Really?” Patrick chuckled, sarcastically. “That’s what you think we should do, stranger? If it was a man, we would have him put to death. I don’t see why an animal should get a pardon.”

“Exactly because he is an animal, and most likely did not have any control over his actions”, Javier argued.

“It’s Yuzuru who should decide what to do – he is out leader, and Pooh-san is his pet”, Satoko put in.

“Really?” Patrick repeated, looking over at Yuzuru, who lay unconscious, as if he were made of stone. “I’d say Yuzuru’s days of deciding what is best for his people are over. Every step he’s taken lately has led to misfortune.”

He turned, and puffed, disdainfully.

“As for that weasel, I don’t need anyone’s permission to run a spear through him when I see him.”

Patrick made to leave, but Satoko blocked his path:

“So what of it, then?” she shouted in his face. “You want to take Yuzuru’s place, and be our leader? You think you are the wisest of us? The people will never follow you, they will follow Yuzuru!”

Patrick merely sneered at her:

“I am the wisest”, he pointed out. “And I know things about Yuzuru that you don’t!”

“You’re just a bitter old man, with a lame leg, tormented by ambitions that will never be realized”, she rattled off, breathlessly.

“That’s funny”, Patrick replied, “coming from someone who’s now also limping. Anyway, look around where you are, Satoko. You’re in my house, under my care. It does not do well to insult your host who has rescued you – rescued you twice, mind you.” He turned slightly, uttering the next words to both her and Javier: “Without me, you’d all be dead. Remember this.”

With a last pointed look at them, Patrick went back outside.

Javier tried to rise from his bed, but he immediately felt dizzy and nauseous, so he had to lie back down. He was forced to agree that they were completely depending on Patrick’s care until they got well.

Later that day, Kaori woke up. She was still very weak and groggy, drinking in tiny spoonfuls and going back to sleep immediately after.

Patrick returned in the evening to feed them, but otherwise ignored them, and there seemed to be a tacit understanding now between Satoko and Javier that they shouldn’t engage him in conversation and provoke him further. Not while he practically held their lives in his hands.

The following day, Yuzuru’s hand twitched in Javier’s hold. Javier looked at him hopefully, but Yuzuru made no further movement. Javier watched over him until he fell asleep.

Javier blinked awake slowly the next day, to find Yuzuru sitting up in his cot, watching him.

“Yuzu….”, Javier mumbled, voice rough from disuse. He cleared his throat. “Somehow I knew you were alright,” he murmured, and smiled up at him, happily.

Yuzuru smiled back and nodded, looking down at him with such a soft expression like it was just the two of them at the edge of the world. Javier remembered they had both saved each other’s lives during the fight with no consideration for losing their own. He had never felt more connected to another human being in his life – simply watching Yuzuru breathe was to him a joy and a reassurance. Javier moved closer to Yuzuru, almost burrowing into his lap, feeling close to tears, and not knowing why. Yuzuru ran slow fingers through his curls, and caressed his back, but said nothing. There was nothing to say, Javier felt, except each other’s names – the rest of it could be expressed only with their eyes:

Are you okay?

I’m okay.

I love you.

I love you.

“Now that you’re all awake, and out of the woods, so to speak, I’m sending you back to the citadel in a carriage”, Patrick casually informed them later that day. “You won’t be of any use here in the fields anyway, not until you’re completely mended.”

Satoko opened her mouth to say something, but Patrick cut her off:

“Yes, this is my decision, and no, I do not accept arguments. Don’t worry, you will have protection on the road, I have called some people that could be spared from the fields, and explained the situation to them.”

“But we can’t go, not until we know what the Wyrdexins are planning”, Kaori said.

“We don’t know that they’re planning anything”, Patrick replied, “beyond the fact that they are a constant danger to us, and that hasn’t changed. All we have is the fever dreams of a woman who has given birth to a premature child, and who came to the fields against all common sense. We don’t even know for sure what happened to that child, beyond what she is telling us.”

“How dare you!” Kaori shouted.

“Are you calling me a liar?” Satoko hissed, at the same time.

Patrick snickered.

“Save your strength”, he replied, shortly. “You’ll need it on the road. Get ready, I will go and make the arrangements.”

Javier worried that Yuzuru might not be strong enough to make the journey, since he had just awoken from his unconscious state. When he told him as much, Yuzuru countered:

“Even if I still feel weak, I only have flesh wounds. But you have a serious head wound, Javi. It is more dangerous to be moved while in this condition, rattled in a carriage.”

“As long as I don’t have to rattle upright in a saddle, I’ll be fine”, Javier replied.

“Then we’ll both be fine”, Yuzuru smiled.

“It’s not like we have much of a choice”, Javier shrugged. “Maybe it’s better to spend some time in the citadel and plan our next move. And Satoko can tell her dream to her Queen directly.”

Yuzuru frowned.

“You’re right, but I can’t help but worry.”

Javier paused, briefly wondering whether to mention Pooh-san, but then decided against it. It would only upset Yuzuru and draw a wedge between them.

“About the people in the fields?” he asked, instead.

“About them, about what awaits us… A new darkness may be coming.”

“There is no darkness that arrives without a dawn.”

“It seems I’ve always been living in darkness”, Yuzuru shook his head, but then paused. “I wonder if your arrival has been my dawn, Javi,” he said, with wonder.

Javier simply took Yuzuru’s hand and entwined their fingers together.

“Thank you for being here”, Yuzuru said, quietly.

“Always”, Javier replied.

The next day, Patrick awoke them at first light, fed them a meagre breakfast, and told them their carriage was waiting. Patrick was brisk and efficient as always, apparently not letting their previous disagreement get in the way of doing his job. However, Javier was certain he would be glad to see the back of them.

As he stumbled outside the hut, still a bit dizzy, thankful he was being carried to his destination instead of using his own two feet or riding, Javier thought he saw Patrick nod meaningfully at one of the men driving the carriage. He did not know what that meant, except it made him uneasy.

As they were bundled up in the carriage, Javier realized that Yuzuru still had not mentioned Pooh-san. By now it was strange, since Yuzuru always took great care of his pet; yet now it looked like he was ready to leave without him. Javier wondered if Yuzuru had maybe forgotten. No, he couldn’t have. More likely, Yuzuru was deliberately avoiding talking about it, because he knew it would be met with disagreement from Javier. He might have also believed or suspected Pooh-san was already dead. Indeed, for all Javier knew, Pooh-san may have been killed back in the clearing, in the skirmish with the Wyrdexins. Patrick did not mention having seen him when Javier had told him about the incident. In any event, Pooh-san’s days were numbered, now that Patrick knew what he had done. Perhaps he was already dead at Patrick’s hand, but Patrick did not see fit to inform them. Javier realized he had taken Patrick for a gruff yet kind person, but now he realized there was an arrogant, even brutal side to him. Patrick did not seem to care much for authority and certainly did not recognize Yuzuru as someone he should show deference to. Javier wanted to believe that if Patrick had killed Pooh-san, he would at least have told Yuzuru who was still Pooh-san’s master, and deserved to know. Perhaps Patrick did tell him, and that explained Yuzuru’s silence. In light of Pooh-san’s actions, maybe Yuzuru thought he did not have the right to grieve openly for his pet. But Javier wished Yuzuru would not feel like he ever needed to hide the pain in his heart, not from Javier.

They were quiet for a long time once they started their journey. The gentle motion of the carriage rolling along was making them feel pleasantly sedate and sluggish.

“Do you remember that old saying, 'To guard a city that can't be guarded, to fight a battle that can't be won - this is the fate of heroes',” Yuzuru spoke up, suddenly.

“Mmm. It’s what they use to tell us back when we were kids”, Satoko answered, then she snorted lightly. “It felt good to be heroes back then.”

“All children want to be heroes”, Kaori chimed in, then yawned.

Yuzuru smiled sadly.

“I always thought it meant that heroes are the only ones brave enough to engage in such a fight. But now, I wonder if so called heroes are the only ones mad enough to even try it.”

“Well, I guess we’re all mad then”, Kaori quipped, then rearranged her bag underneath her head as a makeshift pillow.

“We mustn’t lose faith”, Satoko spoke up, unexpectedly. “This would be our worst fate – not dying, but losing faith - in the world, in ourselves.”

She looked at Yuzuru meaningfully, but Yuzuru merely lifted his shoulders, minutely.

“I’m tired”, he confessed. “Not of fighting, or of labour. Of … all this. I realize I should be thankful I’m still alive, I should be thankful for many things, actually. And yet. I’m tired.”

“Maybe you need a nap”, Kaori deadpanned, all but rolling her eyes at him.

Javier thought he should step in before the three old friends engaged in their usual banter. Yuzuru seemed to be in a strange mood, that he was in a hurry to dispel.

“I’m sorry for your horses”, Javier said, looking between Satoko and Kaori. “I didn’t get a chance to tell you before.” He felt tears sting his eyes at the memory of their attack, tears of sorrow guiltily tinted with relief that if not for the horses, it would have been him at the mercy of the Wyrdexins. “I’m sorry I didn’t even check on Hope and Haru while at Patrick’s…. Brave, clever girls, they saved us. I hope they’re alright.”

“They carried us out of danger”, Satoko nodded, similarly moved. “They got away with only minor wounds, praise the goddess. And Patrick took as much care of them as he did of us. Maybe even more.”

“Did you not notice?” Kaori asked him. “Haru and Hope are drawing our carriage. Not their usual fare, but I think they’ll be glad of the reprieve from danger for a while.”

“Oh thank the gods”, Javier breathed out, immensely relieved. Patrick really did think of everything. He had probably sent them back to the citadel with them simply because they were Yuzuru and Javier’s horses, but Javier couldn’t help but think they had enough of danger for a while, and deserved nothing better than a welcome respite.

Javier turned to Yuzuru and took his hand, clasping it into his own securely.

“I know you're feeling depressed and useless lately”, he said, in a low voice, searching for the right words. “And I don't blame you for it. It's all kept piling up. But hope can be found unexpectedly, in the strangest of places. I don't think I told you what happened after you saved me, after that Wyrdexin collapsed on you out there in the clearing.”

Yuzuru shook his head.

“Tell me,” he urged, eyes wide.

“I helped Satoko and Kaori onto Haru's back, but then the Wyrdexins charged”, Javier began. “They had spotted Satoko and Kaori’s horses, who had arrived as summoned, and were now preparing to devour them. Haru bolted, carrying Satoko and Kaori away. And I was preparing to meet my end, after the horses were eaten. I did not have the energy to withstand them. In that moment, all I wanted was to die by your side, so I spent what I thought was my remaining energy crawling to where you lay. But there, next to you, was Hope. She had answered the whistling call that Satoko made, and now she just stood there, nudging at you to wake up. She did not run when the Wyrdexins charged, nor did the Wyrdexins notice her yet. All these things seemed to me like small miracles, since in that moment I only expected death. And because they were my own precious, unasked for miracles, I resolved I would not let them go to waste. I summoned energy where there was none, and… well, now here we are. But I couldn't have done it without Hope.”

Yuzuru nodded at him, seriously.

“Thank you for telling me, Javi. I know why you’ve told me this story. Thank you. And you know, Javi… you deserve all the miracles in the world.”

Javier kissed his forehead.

“And so do you.”

Somehow Javier wished these four days on the road would never end. Every step took them further away from danger, and closer to the impregnable safety of the citadel. He wondered if that made him a coward.

But even more than the relative safety of the carriage, Javier valued having Yuzuru safe and as close as he could wish. He could take Yuzuru’s hand whenever he felt like it, he could hold him in his arms and wrap himself around him protectively as he slept. He could even steal furtive kisses, at night, under the cover of the blankets. At first, Yuzuru was tense, not wanting anyone to discover them, or not wanting to indulge. But Javier was no longer swayed by these arguments, he wanted to feel close to Yuzuru in every way possible. He did not argue with Yuzuru about it anymore, nor did he ask for permission, he just quieted Yuzuru’s mind by pressing kisses on him, until Yuzuru had no choice but to stop thinking and merely feel. There was nothing else in the world, and nothing to wait for, except their mouths meeting again and again. Yuzuru would slowly melt against Javier with every kiss, and opened his lips, giving into it completely. That moment of surrender always had an aching sweetness to it, and from there it escalated to Yuzuru completely forgetting himself, meeting Javier halfway with matching eagerness, and moaning into his mouth, with no care of being heard. Those kisses – slow and gentle, or passionate and hungry – felt like bliss.

During the day, they would often talk about recent events, and what might happen once they reached the citadel. Javier did not take active part in such conversations, beyond answering when he was asked directly. He even avoided listening to them, as much as he could. It was not because he had lost faith in the fight, but because he did not want to challenge the future. Whatever would happen, he would meet it head on. But while he could, he would rather deny it any space inside his mind. Perhaps when he kissed Yuzuru, he also wanted to stop himself from thinking.

Four days later, they found themselves on the straight path to the citadel. The driver, Yuma, informed them shortly that they would reach it by dusk.

“I will leave you here with Tatsuki, while I ride on ahead to tell them about your arrival, so they can have sealed rooms prepared for you when you enter the citadel”, Yuma told them.

They nodded briefly – they could not have done otherwise. Javier did not like the look of this man – he did not like his furtive looks at them, and the way he always held himself aloof. But he shrugged it off. They were at the end of their journey and soon they would be rid of him anyway.

Keiji nodded briefly, and stared at them inscrutably when their carriage rolled in through the gates, but did not otherwise acknowledge them, and resolutely looked away when they tried to meet his eyes. It was the shorter guard who guided their carriage on the cobbled streets, towards their final destination. Satoko pursed her lips, leaning back in her seat, and stared ahead stoically. Javier lay a hand on her shoulder in comfort.

Once they arrived at the Sealed Rooms, Javier was given a separate chamber from Yuzuru. He had expected no less, but still felt unsettled by their separation. He tried to comfort himself with the thought that soon they will be examined by a healer and most likely allowed to leave afterwards, unless their wounds were still deemed dangerous.

But after spending the last few days in close quarters with others, and most importantly, so close to Yuzuru, the solitude and dreary silence of his tiny windowless chamber felt like a special sort of hell to Javier. He paced the small enclosure like a caged lion, itching to go outside. He felt claustrophobic, and suddenly he remembered his first night in the citadel when, feeling similarly walled in, he decided to take a walk in the rain. It had done him good then, but now he was not allowed to venture outside the Sealed Rooms. But what if he only went to see Yuzuru for a little while – surely that would do no harm?

*

Yuzuru was sitting up quietly on his cot, back propped against the bare wall, staring at the dimly lit surroundings of his small room. There were no windows, and the only light was from a small lamp next to him on the cot. Yuzuru’s fingers were twisting restlessly around a piece of string, with a collar attached to it. It was the only thing he had left from Pooh-san. “He is dead”, Patrick had told him, when he brought him back the collar. It was all Patrick said, and Yuzuru did not ask for more. No other words were needed. If Yuzuru had left Pooh-san safely back in the citadel, this would never have happened. Yuzuru took Pooh-san with him selfishly and against all common sense. How could he hope to protect his people, if he could not only protect his own pet? Why did he act so carelessly? He remembered Javier looking at him in the blood-spattered clearing with a mixture of pity and wariness on his face. Perhaps his years of loneliness have made him mad. Surely Javier thought less of him now, even if he was too kind to say it. He did not want to think of Javier and his kisses, as they lay entwined with each other, their bodies pressed together, frantic with desire. It felt to Yuzuru like another failing, that he could indulge like that. No wonder he made bad decisions. Such a life was not for him. His life should be as simple as a monk’s, and all his thoughts should be spent on how to defend the city that can’t be defended, how to fight the battle that can’t be won.

Yuzuru was startled out of his thoughts, hearing someone fiddle with the lock on his door. He frowned. He was told the healer would see him in the morning.

“Who is it?” he asked, tentatively.

The lock gave, and the door opened slowly. Keiji appeared in the doorway.

“Keiji!” Yuzuru exclaimed surprised. “What are you doing here?”

“I came to see how you’re doing. And to have a chat, if you’re willing. Let’s go outside for some fresh air, it’s stifling in here.”

“Am I allowed to?” Yuzuru hesitated.

“Have you any open wounds?”

“No…, but I haven’t been examined yet and I was told not to leave my chamber until then…”

“Always such a stickler for rules, Yuzuru. Come on, keep company to an old friend”, Keiji said, and Yuzuru couldn’t refuse.

They were walking slowly along the battlements, but neither of them spoke. Keiji was surly and stubbornly silent, despite his own request to chat. Yuzuru was similarly unwilling to break the silence, so he gratefully breathed in the cool evening air, and remained quiet.

“I had a heart to heart with Yuma, who brought you back”, Keiji said, suddenly. “It seems there’s been some interesting developments.”

“Satoko….”

“I don’t mean Satoko”, Keiji waved a hand as if annoyed at Yuzuru bringing her up. “She ran off to you! Of course she did!” he said scornfully.

“What do you mean?” Yuzuru asked, confused.

“Don’t play the fool, it’s a little late now! And I’m not a fool either, you know! Despite all the things people talk about behind my back, I’ve always seen it clearly…”

“Seen what?” Yuzuru insisted, impatient. “What on earth are you talking about?”

Keiji snorted incredulously, like it was obvious:

“Satoko – I’ve always seen the way she looked at you. She never really loved me, she was always too busy looking at you, hoping you’d notice her. But you never did, so I guess she settled for the second best.”

Yuzuru stopped in his tracks, stunned:

“Is that what you really think, Keiji?”

“Isn’t it plain to see?”

“No!” Yuzuru said, empathically. “It couldn’t be further from the truth. It’s absurd. Listen – you, Satoko, Kaori, and me – we went through something together, something I’ll never forget.”

Keiji flinched, as if resenting the memory, and frowned deeply, his face beginning to darken.

“I’m sorry”, Yuzuru said. “I know this still troubles you. But this is exactly why I feel we all share a special bond. You’re my dear friends. More than friends, you’re my brother, Keiji. Satoko and Kaori are my sisters. I love them as much as I love my family, and I know they love me. That’s all there is to it. Satoko fell in love with you, Keiji. Remember when she blushed and stammered in your presence? And you were too shy to talk to her? Remember when she came to you and confessed? How could you even doubt her?”

“Why did she run away from me, then? Eh? Even running into danger was preferable to being with me! She ran away to you, and killed our child! That is all that I need to know!”

“Keiji”, Yuzuru tried again, laying a hand on his arm.

“Shut up!” Keiji screamed, and shook him off. “Stop talking about Satoko! I don’t want to talk about that lying bitch! And I don’t blame you for her lies, I know you didn’t touch her, your interests lie elsewhere, like that handsome stranger!” Keiji laughed suddenly, hysterically. “She’s stupid as well for not seeing it!”

“Satoko’s feelings for me are not like you think”, Yuzuru said calmly. Colour had rushed into his face at the mention of Javier, and he fought to keep his voice steady. Keiji was incredibly volatile that night, and Yuzuru was starting to feel nervous.

“I don’t care!” Keiji shouted again, then unexpectedly slapped Yuzuru across the face. “Stop mentioning her, will you! She can go die in a ditch for all I care, we’re all bound for death anyway!”

Yuzuru took a few steps back, palm pressed to his face in surprise and alarm, as Keiji advanced on him.

“And you… you who were supposed to protect us…. instead you chose to betray us!”

Keiji’s face was now dark and twisted almost unrecognizably, in a horrible expression of helplessness mixed with anger.

Yuzuru swallowed with difficulty. He still had no idea what Keiji wanted or what could possibly have set him off. His lingering guilt surrounding Javier made Yuzuru think it could be about him.

“If you mean, my relationship with Javier, I assure you that it is not what you think”, he spoke up, trying to sound calm and confident. “I – we – I only want to do my duty towards my people.”

Keiji laughed uproariously, a monstrous laugh that chilled the bones. He seemed entirely mad now.

“Your duty…,” he muttered, then laughed again. “Your duty...”

Keiji’s laughter faded as abruptly as it had started, his eyes shooting daggers at Yuzuru. He kicked at his legs viciously, and Yuzuru stumbled to the ground. Keiji followed him down, pinning him so he couldn’t get up.

“All this time, you’ve been drawing death to us…,” Keiji spat out, as he straddled him, “just because you didn’t want to deal with your little rat!” He punched Yuzuru savagely, to emphasize his words. “Do you understand what this is about now? Eh?” Yuzuru grunted, but otherwise made no reply. “Well…” - Keiji went on, “now it will be your blood that draws them. Yes, your blood, right here, on these stones. The stones of these citadel that I’ve protected for so long…-”

“You have protected it for so long”, Yuzuru interrupted, urgently. “How can you endanger it now?”

Keiji ignored him, and went on, as if to himself:

“Yes, these pristine white steps that I’ve rubbed clean so many times…. It will feel so good to defile them now.”

“Listen to me, Pooh-san is dead! If that’s what’s worrying you, it’s over – he’s dead!” Yuzuru shouted. “I can show you his collar, if you don’t believe me…”

Keiji laughed again, wildly, as he pulled out a long knife.

“Oh I know he’s dead, don’t worry!” he said, inspecting the knife. “I know Patrick ended up doing what you could not… I know everything now.”

Yuzuru struggled, but Keiji was crazed, driven by a burst of inhuman strength.

“Are you going to bleed me dry?” Yuzuru asked, looking at the knife.

“Oh, no, I wouldn’t kill you, don’t worry. Despite everything, you’re still my friend. Not kill you, no. Just use you as bait. It’s fitting, don’t you think? Come on! Just think about it! It’s the only way!”

“What are you talking about?” Yuzuru asked, for the second time that night. “Have you really lost your mind, Keiji?”

Keiji gave another short burst of laughter, then straightened his back, and recited, staring into the distance:

“The goddess sleeps and dreams a long dream of peace and prosperity that protects us like a magic spell. But are we really”, he bent down again over Yuzuru to shout viciously in his face: “are we really - prosperous and protected?! No! We’ve never been! No, we always have to be on the lookout for invincible enemies like we’re trapped in a never-ending nightmare! A nightmare. That’s what she’s weaving for us, a nightmare! Patrick was right all along, I see it now. It’s useless to pretend, it’s useless to hope - So you see now, you see -”, his eyes bore down on Yuzuru menacingly.

“Wait”, Yuzuru realized, “you want to wake up the goddess? Is that what this is all about?”

“Now you’re getting it”, Keiji grinned. “She only wakes up to fight when the citadel is poised to fall? Well then, let it fall then!”

He brought his knife down on Yuzuru and hacked viciously at his chest. Blood spilled. Strangely, the sight of blood seemed to have a soothing effect on Keiji’s inflamed senses. He went on carving at Yuzuru’s chest almost clinically, as he explained, on a more sedate tone, as if he was just trying to persuade someone in a friendly debate:

“We’ve always been so careful to protect the citadel, haven’t we? Even when the rest of Yilia was under threat… But maybe that’s not what we should have done. We should have put the citadel first and foremost in danger…”

“Keiji”, Yuzuru forced out, amid gasps of pain, “do you know what happens when the goddess wakes? The death and destruction-”

“I don’t care!” Keiji screamed, brought again to his previous paroxysm of anger. “I don’t care! Let other people suffer too! Let them die! Why should I be the only one who loses everything? It’s not fair!”

Keiji was fast losing his battle against restraint. His hands twitched, and Yuzuru braced himself for another blow, but instead Keiji’s fingers descended onto his neck, tightening brutally around his windpipe. Keiji squeezed, eyes bulging out of his sockets, completely out of his mind. There was no strategy to his actions now, only the mindless desire to hurt, and Yuzuru could no longer reach him – he was lost to the world, having succumbed to his demons at last. Keiji squeezed and laughed, delighted with his power, and Yuzuru closed his eyes in defeat.

After he couldn’t find Yuzuru in his room, Javier wandered around outside, dizzy and unsettled. No matter how he tried to appease himself that nothing could happen to Yuzuru in the citadel, he had probably gone to see a healer, he was perfectly alright before, there was no reason for his health to take a downturn – all these logical arguments were nonsense to Javier’s mind. The sinking feeling in his stomach only increased with each passing second.

It was like that time in the cave when he felt Yuzuru’s sickness – he was sure of it.

He was feeling Yuzuru’s pain, his anxiety.

Something was happening to Yuzuru. And Javier wasn’t there to help him.

Javier was ready to cry out in frustration. He would have raced to the end of the world, but he had no idea in which direction to go.

And suddenly, as if in answer to his thoughts, he heard a muffled noise. It came from the battlements.

Without pausing for thought, Javier ran in the direction of the noise.

Soon he glimpsed a figure crouched on the steps. In the dim light, Javier recognized Keiji. He thought he could see another figure lying on the ground. His heart beating faster, he approached as fast as he could, while keeping his stealth.

Javier was close enough now to see that the figure on the ground was Yuzuru.

Keiji was straddling him and mumbling something. Javier could see Keiji’s hands locked around Yuzuru’s throat, and Yuzuru lying apparently unconscious.

In an instant, Javier’s confusion and fear gave way to pure anger. Darkness flooded his vision, and he reacted on pure instinct. He leaped on top of Keiji, knocking him off Yuzuru. Too stunned to put up a fight, Keiji could only look up at Javier, not even trying to defend himself, blinking slowly, as if trying to wake up from a dream. Javier savagely punched Keiji into unconsciousness until his own knuckles bruised and bled.

Without registering the pain, and without even noticing the blood on his own hands, Javier returned his attention to Yuzuru. The first thing he saw was the blood – it seemed to Javier that a bloodbath had taken place there, and Yuzuru lay in the middle of it, wounded, pale and still. Taking it all in, Javier began shaking so badly with panic, that he could not move an inch.

“Help!” Javier screamed, desperately. “Someone help! Help here! Please-!” his scream trailed off on a wail.

In the distance, a voice answered, steps coming closer. He took heart in the fact that help was on the way. He took a few deep breaths, trying to calm down.

“Over here!” Javier shouted, his voice steadier now.

He knelt above Yuzuru, brow furrowed with worry, but determined to examine the mess of blood on Yuzuru’s chest. To his immense relief, he realized that even though it looked bad, the cuts were not deep enough to be life threatening.

Under Javier’s gentle touches, Yuzuru’s eyes opened slowly.

“Javi”, he smiled up at him. “I knew you’d come.”

Javier smiled back, grasping Yuzuru’s cheek with his bloody hands:

“Of course I came. You’re mine. I won’t ever let anything happen to you”.

The words had tumbled out of their own accord. They expressed Javier’s sentiments exactly, but he wouldn’t have chosen to utter them out loud in such stupidly possessive terms, not when the circumstance did not seem to warrant it. He would have done the same for anyone else who was in danger – he did not save Yuzuru because of their bond, or because Javier saw Yuzuru as his possession. And yet the words were true, making some sort of strange, deeply ingrained sense in Javier’s mind. Yuzuru belonged to him, Yuzuru was a part of him – Yuzuru must never, ever be hurt.

Yuzuru did not seem to find Javier’s words strange or unnatural. He nodded up at Javier with complete trust.

“I’m yours”, he agreed.

There was a discreet cough and Javier looked up to see the small guard had arrived and was now standing there, eyes childishly wide as he took in the scene in front of him.

“Er – Shoma, right?” Javier stammered.

Shoma gave a brief nod.

“Please go to the Queen and tell her that Keiji attacked Yuzuru. Tell her to send help – Yuzuru is injured!”

“And tell them there’s blood on the stones!” Yuzuru added. “It must be cleaned as soon as possible!”

To his credit, Shoma did not ask for further clarifications, he merely nodded at them, then turned on his heels and ran off.

As he watched Shoma go, momentarily relieved that help was on the way, Javier suddenly became aware of a bone-deep exhaustion and dizziness. He put his hand to his forehead, as he felt a splitting headache take over. He groaned.

“Javi?” Yuzuru asked, worriedly.

“I’m fine”, Javier hurried to reassure him. “It’s just that my head wound is not fully healed, so now with all this commotion, it’s starting to ache again. I was silly enough to think that coming to the citadel meant a welcome break from the danger and fighting.”

Javier tried to chuckle, lightly, but it turned into a sob.

“Javi”, Yuzuru chided him gently. “You need to be more caring to yourself, not only to me.”

Javier rolled his eyes.

“It’s you who keeps getting into trouble,”, he chided back. “Why did Keiji attack you, anyway?” he asked, curiously.

“He’s mad”, Yuzuru answered, looking at Keiji who lay insensitive from Javier’s punches. “He wanted to awaken the goddess by spilling my blood and attracting the Wyrdexins here.”

“Oh no!” Javier exclaimed. “Then he might have succeeded? Your chest is an open wound, and when I arrived, I also helped by punching his face until my own knuckles bled too. Do you think we’ll all be incinerated now?”

“Don’t joke about such things, Javi”, Yuzuru smiled, wanly.

“Oh, I’m not joking! On my first day here, this man-”, Javier pointed to Keiji, “burned a banner just because I pricked my finger on my dagger. No bleeding anywhere in the city”, Javier recited, mocking Keiji’s gruff voice. “That’s what he told me. It was the first lesson I learned about the citadel of the Yilians. And now – what will happen to us?”

“Some punishment will be dealt for this, of course. But for tonight, I think we will all be taken back to the Sealed Rooms. We will probably remain there until the matter is investigated. And this place will be thoroughly cleaned. All may yet be well”, Yuzuru replied.

It was as if, once Javier was out of sorts, in pain and anxious, it was Yuzuru’s turn to be calm and decisive, quieting his fears.

“Don’t worry about anything, Javi. No one will blame you for punching Keiji. He would have killed me, if you hadn’t come. The healers will examine you, and they will give you something for the pain, and for a restful sleep. I will make sure of it.”

“I wish we could sleep together tonight”, Javier sighed.

“Then none of us would be getting any sleep, and we both need it”, Yuzuru replied, as he blushed.

But Javier for once ignored the innuendo.

“I’d feel better if you were next to me, so I’d know you’re safe”, he said, seriously.

“I know”, Yuzuru agreed. “Me too. I promise I’ll try to make some arrangements tomorrow.”

Javier perked up at that.

They could hear voices in the distance, and when they looked up, they saw people with torches approaching. Javier closed his eyes briefly, and nodded.

“Well, if you promise me that, then I guess I can try to survive alone for one night, if they also sedate me”, he said, without any humour.

Just like Yuzuru had anticipated, all three of them were carefully examined by healers, for wounds both fresh and new. They were bandaged and medicated, and then they were placed in separate sealed rooms. Yuzuru gave the Queen and her advisors a brief account of what happened, but Keiji merely grunted, refusing to state his own version of the story. It was decided that further interrogation would take place tomorrow. The stones where the blood had spilled were hastily rubbed clean, and several guards were posted on the battlements to warn of any approaching danger. The smell of blood still lingered in the air, but so far the night was quiet, and some hoped they might yet escape danger.

Some hours after midnight, when the excitement died down, Daisuke sneaked into Keiji’s sealed room. For a while, he simply watched the sleeping man in silence.

“You idiot,” Daisuke finally said, coldly. “Spilling blood in the citadel, putting us all in danger, and all for nothing. At least finish the job, you spineless lout.”

Keiji stirred, and Daisuke, fast as lightning, used his own long knife to stab him through the heart. Keiji gasped, blood frothing at the mouth, eyes opening wide abruptly as he stared at Daisuke in disbelief in his final moments. Daisuke merely returned the stare, unblinkingly.

“See, now I’ll have to finish it for you,” he said, disgruntled, retrieving his knife, and wiping it on Keiji’s shirt. He rose to his feet in a single smooth motion, then spat on Keiji’s corpse for good measure.

“Idiot”, he repeated. “Good for nothing until the end.”

Daisuke turned on his heels, and left, leaving the door wide open. He wanted Keiji discovered as soon as possible.

And indeed, barely an hour passed, and clamour broke again in the citadel.

“Murder! Murder in the Sealed Rooms!”

People were shouting and tripping over themselves in their panic. Blood inside the citadel was bad enough – but now murder! It was as if with the stranger’s arrival, everything was escalating. Nothing was sacred anymore. They busied himself with removing the body and preparing it for incineration, after which Keiji’s room was quickly cleaned of blood. The sheets were swimming in blood so they were deemed a lost cause and burned immediately. They performed all these actions fast and efficiently, almost without thinking. It was the obvious thing to do, even a child knew it – in case of blood or death, thoroughly clean the area. Only afterwards did it occur to them that they had to inform the Queen and her advisors. They were reprimanded for destroying evidence by cleaning the room, and they were ordered to place Keiji’s body in a sealed coffin until it could be examined.

Both Javier and Yuzuru, heavily sedated, slept on through the night, unbothered by the noises. In the early morning, Javier was awakened abruptly by his door being flung open so fast, it slammed against the wall. Still sluggish, he opened his eyes, only to widen them in surprise upon seeing Shizuka rushing inside his room. She appeared to be alone. Javier could only stare at her, too stunned to react, or even find the right words to greet her. She did not seem to expect any greeting however, as she quickly approached his bed, and started whispering to him, her voice shaking with anxiety. Javier could not catch most of it – in her distressed state, Shizuka’s accent was too strong, and her attempts to be as quiet as possible, even in her panic, did not help Javier understand her any better. He smiled apologetically up at her.

“I don’t understand”, he said. “Please tell me again more slowly.”

Shizuka groaned in despair. Javier had never seen her like this, and he was both embarrassed and unsettled.

“Tell me why have you done it?” Shizuka hissed at him, making an effort to speak more slowly. “Was it because you feared he might still hurt Yuzuru?”

Javier stared at her, confused. His mind only processed the words ‘hurt’ and ‘Yuzuru’ and he felt the chill of fear in his heart.

“Answer me!” She insisted. “Tell me, or I can’t protect you!”

Her whisper trailed off, as booted guards entered the room noisily behind her. Several of her advisors, including Daisuke, loomed in the doorway.

Shizuka straightened, and looked at Javier coldly.

“Put this man in prison”, she ordered.

Chapter Text

“We can somehow understand Javier’s crazed actions in light of the binding curse. But we cannot excuse them or pardon them.” Daisuke paused for effect, looking pointedly around at everyone.

The people in the royal council averted their eyes. Most of them were nodding, while others looked dubious, but neither of them openly agreed or disagreed with Daisuke.

“Blood has been wilfully spilled within citadel walls, and that alone is an unforgivable crime”, Daisuke went on, grandly. “A stranger has killed one of our own. Not in combat, and not even to save the prince’s life. Yuzuru was already rescued, and Keiji was already subdued, when Javier returned to him, in stealth, just to finish the deed. That we cannot pardon.”

“You are talking as if the matter of Javier’s guilt is already proven beyond doubt, yet we are just beginning to investigate it”, Akiko said suddenly. She was also an advisor in the royal council, and one whose wisdom the queen valued. “All we know for certain now is that Keiji was stabbed with a long knife in the Sealed Rooms, in the small hours of the morning, and the murderer either carelessly or intentionally left the door open, so the body was discovered almost immediately. Regretfully, the scene was cleaned by our overzealous Caretakers of the Sealed Rooms before we could examine it.”

“Indeed”, Shizuka agreed. “You are already appointing yourself judge and executioner, Daisuke”, she observed, cuttingly. “If your bias against Javier is making it difficult for you to be impartial, you will leave the pursuit of this investigation to the rest of my advisors.”

Daisuke threw up his hands, palms open, in mock confusion.

“Forgive me, my Queen, I was merely voicing my thoughts out loud. Is this not the purpose of our gathering, to debate this issue? Since you placed enough trust in me to be among those who judge this matter, I have given it proper thought, and reached only one possible conclusion. Javier is the obvious suspect, in fact the only suspect. Who else could it have been? Keiji was murdered in the Sealed Rooms, so it must have been done by someone already there. Javier’s room was right next to Keiji’s. It would have been the simplest thing for him to sneak out, kill Keiji, then sneak back in. It would have been difficult for an outsider to gain entrance to the Sealed Rooms, as access is restricted there except by special dispensation. Moreover, he had viciously attacked Keiji only a few hours before the murder. He had the motive, and the means.”

Akiko smiled.

“To someone bold and determined enough to commit murder despite all taboos against it, gaining entrance to a place that’s off limits would be an easily solved problem and a minor trespassing compared to the crime that would follow.”

“Quite true!” Daisuke shouted. “Which is why I don’t think any of our own would dare to even attempt it! Leaving aside the lack of motive – why would one of us commit an even bloodier act, when Keiji’s misdeed had just been wiped clean, and the danger of attracting the Wyrdexins with the smell of blood narrowly averted? No, it only takes a thoughtless foreigner, someone not properly educated in the dangers of-”

“Was Keiji not properly educated about the dangers of spilling blood in the citadel?” Shizuka interrupted. “And yet he had the mindless audacity to attack my son, out in the open!”

“My Queen, your outrage is understandable!” Daisuke bowed. “And yet – did Keiji deserve to pay with his life?”

“Stop twisting my words!” Shizuka hissed at him. “This is not a philosophical debate, it’s a murder investigation!”

Realizing he had maybe gone too far, Daisuke sat back down and repeated, on a low tone:

“I was just thinking out loud, I am sorry if my thoughts were unwelcome.”

Shizuka gave an annoyed sigh.

“Please save your valuable thoughts for discussing actual evidence. We have two mysteries to untangle now. The first, is why Keiji attacked my son. We only have Yuzuru’s version of events now, and he could only give us a partial and maybe inaccurate glimpse into Keiji’s mind, based on what Keiji told him during the attack. We will never know for sure why Keiji was driven to this point, because he is no longer alive to tell us. And the second mystery is Keiji’s death. One might think that Keiji was killed precisely so that he could not reveal more about what led him to attack Yuzuru. The two incidents may be connected indeed, but not in the way you think, Daisuke.”

“My Queen”, Daisuke began, “since you have addressed me directly, I will again humbly offer a piece of my mind, even if it is unsolicited. Javier and Yuzuru are under the binding spell. It is a powerful spell, and it has never before been used to bind only two people together. The weight of it, shared only between two, must be immeasurable. One can only imagine what Javier felt when he saw Yuzuru attacked. Indeed, his rage was obvious, because Keiji was beaten unconscious. Who knows what demons Javier’s mind may have conjured afterwards in the night, that made him get up and finish the job. With Keiji’s murder, Javier had ensured both Yuzuru’s safety, and his own peace of mind. I am afraid”, Daisuke simpered, “that this is the most obvious explanation, and a very regrettable effect of the binding curse.”

Shizuka remained quiet, as Daisuke’s words reminded her of her own question to Javier: “Tell me why you have done it! Was it because you feared he might still hurt Yuzuru?” She had also assumed Javier’s guilt for the same reason. But Javier had looked so genuinely confused, that she found herself doubting his guilt. Still, as the majority of the council clamoured for the stranger to be placed under arrest as the most obvious suspect, she did not oppose them.

“If this is indeed what happened, Javier is not at fault”, Shizuka said, emphatically. It is our fault for inflicting this heavy curse on him. If the roles were reversed, it could have been my son lying now in prison.”

Daisuke looked at Shizuka with an expression of pity.

“It must be awful for you to know that if Javier were to be punished as he deserves, Yuzuru would also feel the brunt of it. Yet I would hope, for the sake of justice that this will not sway you in showing Javier mercy….”

“If – if – Javier turns out to be guilty, he will get his due, worry not”, Shizuka spoke through clenched teeth. “For now, I would like to hear what he has to say for himself. I will not be as quick as you to condemn a man without even hearing his side of the story, Daisuke.” She then addressed a guard standing at the door: “Bring Javier here.”

Javier was sitting in prison, trying to clear his mind.

He had not objected to being taken by the guards and placed in a cold, dark cell – still too sleepy and too stunned at this unforeseen turn of events to react with outrage, as he would have usually done under such circumstances. As the guards locked the door on him, Javier had enough sense to turn to Shizuka who had accompanied him, along with a few of her royal advisors, and ask her, anxiously:

“Is Yuzuru alright?”

Shizuka’s frown gave way to a soft smile.

“He’s fine”, she answered, and that was enough for Javier.

Nodding , he turned around, and sat down on a pile of straw scattered on the dirty floor . Shizuka was apparently waiting for him to ask why he was imprisoned. But Javier remained silent, so she had no choice but to tell him:

“Keiji is dead.”

Javier’s eyes widened:

“Dead? How? When?” he asked.

“Sometime during the night”, Shizuka answered. “Murdered.”

Javier shook his head, bewildered, trying to piece it all together. Who could have killed Keiji and why? Gods – they think it was me who did it. That’s why I’m here.

“I didn’t do it”, he blurted.

Shizuka was studying him carefully:

“You will have the chance to defend yourself in front of the royal council later.”

She nodded at him again, seriously, then left, followed closely by her advisors. The guards remained posted outside his cell.

Some hours later, when a single guard arrived and said something in a low voice to those still standing outside his cell, Javier knew that he was finally summoned to the council. Since he was innocent and had nothing to hide, he was not worried about the interrogation. He was, however, very curious and a little unsettled about this development. The breaking of the blood taboo in the citadel in this way, twice in the same night, following their arrival, seemed like a bad omen. Javier did not know this, but in the citadel people were already clamouring, after hearing about Keiji’s murder, Yuzuru’s injury and Satoko’s dream, that the arrival of the stranger to Yilia was a bad omen, that he had brought them more bad luck than they had in decades. Daisuke had done his best to feed these notions and fuel the people’s anger and frustration as much as he could. But Javier went to the interrogation fully set on cooperating, unaware of how many people, even in the royal council, were already convinced of his guilt.

Javier was led to a chair in front of the assembly, and guided to sit. He was not restrained, for which he was thankful, but two of the guards remained close by, while another stood at the door. He noticed that when he entered, everyone became tense.

Javier did his best to show a lack of concern, and smiled openly.

“Well, I am here”, he said, on a friendly tone. “Ready to answer your questions.”

“Take us through what happened last night, Javier”, Shizuka told him, kindly. “Start from the beginning.”

Javier nodded and began with their arrival in the citadel and how they were placed in sealed rooms.

“I felt like I couldn’t breathe in the small room, and I could sense something wasn’t right, so I made my way outside. I wanted to see Yuzuru.”

At this point Daisuke interrupted.

“So you left your chamber and the Sealed Rooms altogether, even though it was not allowed. You were informed of this.”

“….Yes”, Javier admitted. “But if I had not done so -”

“You care little for our rules”, Daisuke noted, coldly.

“No, I wouldn’t say that”, Javier defended himself. “It’s just that..”

“ it’s just that you only follow them when it suits you”, Daisuke ended, disdainfully.

“Look, how can my minor rule-breaking be the issue here?” Javier asked, starting to get annoyed.

“Because”, Daisuke answered, readily, “it proves your ability and willingness to leave your locked room whenever it pleases you, against our specific rules. You could have done the same in the middle of the night and murdered Keiji.”

Javier snorted:

“Yes, except when I first left my room, I had a very good reason. I wanted to find Yuzuru and reassure myself that he was alright. When I did not find him in his chamber, then your rule of not leaving the Sealed Rooms seemed less important to me than finding Yuzuru.”

“Did you sense the danger Yuzuru was in?” Daisuke inquired, shrewdly.

“I did”, Javier readily admitted.

“I see. You were worried about him.”

“Of course I was”, Javier frowned, unable to understand where Daisuke was going with this.

“Let me remind you all of the words of the fearsome binding ritual, words that Javier repeated and sworn to obey: If you come to grievous harm, I will seek to avenge you even onto death.”

Daisuke paused, looking around the room, to let the words sink in.

“But… Yuzuru did not come to grievous harm. He is alright, isn’t he?” Javier looked at Shizuka for reassurance.

She gave a brief nod.

“Yes” Daisuke agreed, “we know that now, but in those moments, who knows what you may have been thinking?”

Javier shook his head, unwilling to be led on this way.

“This would have made sense if I had killed Keiji right away when I stumbled upon him trying to choke Yuzuru. I looked down at Yuzuru’s bloody chest and I do not deny that the fear of death came upon me. But after I examined the wounds, I saw that they were superficial. If I were to kill Keiji driven mad by the binding ritual, I would have killed him before I checked on Yuzuru and determined he was not in mortal danger. And I certainly had no reason to sneak in and do it later at night”, Javier shrugged.

“But if you-”, Daisuke began to argue, undeterred.

“Javier, please continue your story”, Shizuka intervened. “The cross-questioning will come later.”

Daisuke bowed, and signalled to Javier magnanimously to continue.

Javier went on, leaving out no detail, but keeping it brief and factual, careful o f not letting his emotions colour his account . Doing so would have only served Daisuke’s purpose. He finished by saying that after receiving the sleeping powders, he had fallen asleep as soon as he lay down on his cot, and slept deeply until he was awakened in the morning to be taken to prison.

“You did not wake at all during the night?” Daisuke asked, and Javier raised an eyebrow at him.

“I was under sedation, and I’m still recovering from a fairly serious head wound”, Javier answered, patiently, trying not to get angry. “No, I did not wake at all.”

“You were also recovering from your head wound when you attacked Keiji earlier that day”, Daisuke quipped, conveniently ignoring the first part of the sentence.

“That was different. Yuzuru was in danger and I had to act.”

“So you magically found some strength where there was none before?”

“...Something like that. It often happens like that in cases of grave danger. Haven’t you noticed? But to accuse me of a premeditated murder after I was given a powder strong enough to knock out a horse…. well, that’s a bit far-fetched”, Javier deadpanned.

“Even if you somehow became convinced that Yuzuru was still in danger?” Daisuke insisted, undeterred.

“Why would I think Yuzuru was still in danger?” Javier frowned, confused. “The incident was over, all three of us were examined and given pain medication and sleeping powders. For all I knew, Keiji would sleep until morning, just like Yuzuru and me.”

“Yes…”, Daisuke nodded, as if he agreed, but then exclaimed triumphantly: “- and yet, isn’t it true that you said to one of the healers: Please give me some of the strong stuff, or I’ll be too worried to sleep away from him.” Daisuke turned to Shizuka and nodded meaningfully, “See, Shizuka, I am working on evidence here.”

“Well… yes”, Javier admitted, and blushed.

“So you were, indeed, still worried about Yuzuru”, Daisuke exclaimed, vindicated.

“… I was also heavily sedated,” Javier pointed out, sarcastically.

Daisuke waved that aside.

“Like you said, if there’s danger, you find resources. We have no way of knowing what strength you have, or what magic. For all we know, our potions may have little effect on you.”

Javier laughed, incredulously.

“You make it sound like I’m some sort of god. Trust me, your potions work as much on me as they do on you. I’m human, just like you, with no special powers, and I’m not a mage.”

Daisuke shrugged his shoulders deliberately, as if to say What do I know.

He turned to the council and said, simply:

“Like I said before – he had access, and he had motive. I’ve reached my conclusion, and I have nothing more to say.”

Javier stared at him.

For a while, silence reigned in the room. Javier was beginning to get nervous, as he searched for a way to sway people to his side. For some reason, something about access and Daisuke sounded familiar. He racked his exhausted brains, and finally remembered, fragments of a dialogue between Koshiro and Kazuki, when the harpies came upon them unexpectedly:

“But why are you so sure it was Daisuke who let loose the harpies?”

“Come on, it’s obvious. He has access to them, and could easily do it without anyone being aware.”

“Yes, but why?”

“Like I said, to stir up trouble.”

Back then, Kazuki refused to say anything more, and Javier did not understand what that meant. He still didn’t, but he had nothing to lose, he had to risk it.

“I was not the only one with access”, Javier said, emphasizing the word, and watched as Daisuke turned slowly to look at him.

The expression of bewilderment on his face was quite satisfying, until Daisuke asked:

“And what do you mean by that exactly?”

Javier shrugged.

“Just that you are an important man in the citadel and it makes sense that you would have access where ordinary people do not.”

Daisuke grinned, and Javier noticed with irritation he was back to being unaffected.

He went on:

“For instance, when we left for the fields, a flock of harpies came upon us unawares, and our horses were spooked. It caused quite a bit of trouble for us. Our two young companions, Koshiro and Kazuki – may they rest well in the valleys of the gods – thought they were let loose on purpose – by you.”

Javier fixed Daisuke with his eyes while he spoke to show he was not intimidated. Daisuke held his gaze, and Javier thought he could see a flicker of alarm, or uncertainty in his eyes.

“This is interesting”, Shizuka said. “Have you anything to say to that, Daisuke?”

Daisuke laughed.

“Yes! It is preposterous! Javier is cornered and grasping at straws! How convenient for him to remember the words of two dead men who can no longer corroborate his story!”

“But it is true that you are the Keeper of the Keys”, Shizuka said smoothly, and Javier could’ve jumped in triumph.

Keeper of the Keys. It was even better than he expected.

“So then, am I being accused?” Daisuke laughed. “Why should I have done it? Where is your proof?”

“To frame me”, Javier spoke without thinking. “You are very intent on proving my guilt and ignoring all the facts I bring to my defense.”

“Because your defense holds no water!” Daisuke laughed. “And your audacity in accusing me is incredible!”

“Silence”, Shizuka intervened. “Javier – do you have anything else to say about this matter?”

Javier thought about it.

“What was the murder weapon?” he asked, at length. “Has it been found?”

Daisuke snorted, and did not reply.

“We did not find it, but looking at Keiji’s wound, we learned that a long knife was used to kill him. A single stab, a deep, clean cut”, Akiko answered him. “This does not tell us much about the owner, except that he or she is skilled in combat, which we all must be to survive when we are sent to the fields.”

“Do people carry weapons in the citadel?”, Javier asked, confused. “Despite the strict rules against bloodletting and fighting?”

Akiko answered:

“Weapons are allowed for training, of course. And all of us carry long knives, even if we mostly use them for domestic activities, like peeling apples or cutting fabrics.”

Javier smiled widely at her:

“Except I don’t carry one at all”, he said. “Aside from the spear that Yuzuru taught me to wield, this is my only weapon.” He reached into his belt and retrieved Salchow, his dagger. He unsheathed it, showing people its distinct curved blade. “It looks very different from a long knife, does it not? It would cause a very different wound.”

Akiko frowned, and then nodded slowly in acknowledgement.

“This.. this is irrelevant”, Daisuke stammered. “If you wanted to hide your tracks, of course you would have used someone else’s weapon!”

“But whose? Who would lend me their weapon for such a business?”

“You – you could have stolen one! Or used Keiji’s!”

“After attacking Yuzuru, Keiji was summarily relieved from his position as a guard of the citadel – as a result, he was stripped of his livery and weapons”, Akiko said, shortly.

“And also, since I have never wielded a long knife of the kind that is so popular in Yilia, I daresay I would not manage a deep clean cut to murder a man on my first try”, Javier added, then turned to Daisuke: “It’s easy to forget the little ways in which people are different, isn’t it?” he asked, meaningfully. “Better to focus on the big ones, like magic, inhuman strength, disregard for the rules, killer instinct – that’s how you want to paint me in the eyes of the Yilians. But in fact, one actual difference you overlooked is – I carry a dagger, not a long knife.”

Javier winked at him.

“And it is a very important difference”, Akiko mused. “In fact, this throws a new light on the case. It is strong factual evidence that, in fact, a Yilian was responsible. “There were three other people in the Sealed Room that night: Yuzuru, Kaori and Satoko. They will each be interrogated, of course, and we will examine their weapons.”

Javier opened his mouth to argue, then shut it again.

“My son should have been here today, but his fresh injury prevents him from leaving the Sealed Rooms for now”, Shizuka said, suddenly. “If it had not been for Keiji’s murder, this council would have had another purpose: to discuss the recent development of the Wyrdexin threat. In fact, I am still pondering if we should not proceed with discussing this matter. Perhaps it is even linked to Keiji’s murder. It is undeniably linked to Keiji’s sudden madness, at the very least.”

The members of the council shifted uncomfortably in their seats, and stared at each other.

“Is Satoko able to leave the Sealed Rooms? If so, she should come here and give us a full account,” Akiko said.

Shizuka nodded. She then addressed the council:

“In light of the new evidence brought to Keiji’s murder case that the weapon used to kill him was not one that Javier had in his possession or could easily obtain, I am releasing Javier from prison. He is to be returned to the Sealed Rooms where he will remain for now. He is also to receive medicine if he needs it.” She turned to Javier: “The Sealed Rooms are called this way for a purpose, Javier. Even if they are not as such, a prison, and even if it is easy for you to escape them, I would recommend that you do not venture outside for the present time. At least until we can get to the bottom of this matter, or until I decide differently.”

Javier nodded, and bowed low.

“Of course, I understand. And I apologize for my earlier transgressions.”

Shizuka smiled.

“Then you may go. The guards will accompany you there, as a pure precaution. And Satoko is to be summoned to the council.”

No one in the council had reason to question the Queen’s decision, even if there were still several who saw Javier as guilty. For all intents and purposes, Javier retained his prisoner status, except he traded his cold underground cell for a more comfortable chamber where he would be similarly walled in.

After returning to his chamber, Javier did not go to see Yuzuru, no matter how badly he wanted it. He did not want to give Daisuke more opportunity to say he was nothing but a stranger with complete disregard for their rules.

Instead, Javier lay on his cot, staring at the ceiling, and thought about the recent developments, trying to make sense of it all.

According to Yuzuru’s account, Keiji was enraged about what Pooh-san had done. Yuzuru told them the animal was now dead, without telling them how he died. Javier strongly suspected Patrick may have taken matters in hand when learning about what Pooh-san had done. He wondered if Yuzuru blamed him for telling Patrick about it. But what else could Javier have done?

Javier thought about Patrick’s role in all this. Whether intentionally or by accident, he was the one who set all these events in motion from afar. From killing Pooh-san, to recounting the entire incident to the carriage driver, who then told Keiji about it. Javier remembered Patrick’s meaningful nod to Yuma before they left, which had made him so uneasy. That nod led Javier to think everything was not accidental, Patrick wanted to set all these events in motion. Whether or not he expected Keiji to snap completely, or he just did it to further undermine Yuzuru’s authority and trustworthiness, it was anybody’s guess; but Patrick was an ambitious person who was not above using others to further his agenda. Was he in league with Daisuke somehow? Did they conspire against both him and Yuzuru? He remembered how most of the members of the council looked at him with distrust. How many of the people in the citadel were against them already?

Javier shook his head. It was not right to begin suspecting everyone of evil intentions, but the fact that he was imprisoned overnight for a crime he did not commit had rattled him. By now, Javier was almost entirely convinced Daisuke had killed Keiji, perhaps for the specific reason of framing Javier. Fortunately, the Queen at least seemed convinced of Javier’s innocence. But there were still plenty of reasons for him to feel unsettled. Daisuke was a very powerful person, and it seemed like no mischief he made had ever been big enough to topple him from his secure position. He wondered how powerful Daisuke really was, and why did the Queen tolerate him, despite the obvious fact that she also mistrusted him. Could it have been as simple as the fact that she had some affection for him?

Javier’s thoughts drifted to Satoko and Keiji. His heart squeezed in sympathy for Satoko, losing her child and her man in such horrible ways, within such a short span of time. Javier did not know what to make of her dream. In some ways, he agreed with Patrick. He did not think the Yilians should go back to the dark days of paying tribute. Since they knew more about the Wyrdexins than they did then, they might hope to deal with them differently. Yuzuru’s idea of gathering a strong army to raid their nests still remained in play as a good approach. But the decision did not rest with Javier.

The fate of the Yilians seemed grim indeed. Yet Javier did not regret coming to this land, despite the violence and danger he was constantly surrounded by. He did not regret binding his life to Yuzuru.

Javier must have fallen back asleep at some point, because he was startled awake by someone entering his room again. Whoever th is person was, they were trying to be stealthy. Javier could glimpse only their shadow approaching, with an almost soundless footfall. He gripped his dagger on instinct, sensing danger. The intruder must have glimpsed the glimmer of the blade, because he crossed the room in a second, with incredible speed, and Javier felt a stab in his arm. Javier cried out and dropped the dagger. Another strike followed, this time catching Javier across the collarbone. A punch to his face followed, almost knocking him out, and Javier fell back on the bed.

A candle was lit abruptly, lighting up the dim corners of the room , and Javier squinted only to be met by Daisuke’s face, twisted with malice. But he was not mindless with anger, like Keiji had been. As insane as it was, this was still a premeditated attack. When Daisuke spoke, his voice was cold and mocking, and his eyes remained calculated:

“Don’t worry”, he told Javier. “I will be more prudent than Keiji. I don’t want the goddess to wake, why should she wake? Let the peasants die in the fields, as long as I’m safe here. We’re in the Sealed Rooms, where blood can flow freely. I’ll show you such a good time, Javier. You’ll rue the day you spoke against me.”

“If you kill me”, Javier panted, “everyone will know you did it. You will never get away with it, no matter how powerful you are.”

“Do you really think that?” Daisuke laughed. “You’re nothing in this land. Just a stranger. Everyone hates you already, and thinks you should have stayed away. Don’t worry, by the time I’m done with you, you’ll wish you were dead, and thank me for putting you to death like a mercy.”

Daisuke punctuated his words with blows to Javier’s face, which made his head wound start bleeding again and his temples throb with a piercing pain.

“You’ll never get away with this”, Javier repeated, faintly, his fingers frantically looking for his dagger between the sheets.

Daisuke noticed that, and produced some rope out of his pocket, tying Javier’s hands cruelly tight together.

“We’ll see”, he answered. “The people already hate you. They think you brought misfortune to them. Your passing will not be a bad news to many. And if you’re thinking that Yuzuru will sense what’s happening and come to your rescue, I have to crush your hopes. Yuzuru is … rather tied up at the moment. He won’t be able to make it.”

Javier looked at him defiantly. Daisuke laughed, loudly.

“Oh, okay. Let me put your faith in him to rest once and for all. He’s weaponless, chained tight into a sealed dungeon. He’d have to tear apart his flesh with his teeth to escape the chains I put him in. And after that, he’d have to break through the iron bars. And if he’d somehow manage to do all that, once outside, he’d meet my chimera. My poor hungry chimera, starving because of the strict meat ration in the citadel.”

“No! The Queen will have you executed if you hurt him!”

Daisuke grinned.

“But I don’t have to – don’t you get it? Yuzuru will be able to feel what I’m doing to you anyway. And he will know there is absolutely nothing he can do about it. All I need him to do is to stay put where he is, and then I’ll free him. After you’re dead, of course. I’ve been wanting to test this theory ever since you two swore the soul binding oath. I think if you were to die like this, Javier, it would drive Yuzuru raving mad. But what do you think? I’m always up for a good debate.”

Javier could barely process this, his head splitting with pain, and his heart beating wildly in terror. He had to do something to save himself, but he felt helpless. Against all reason, he started screaming:

“Help! Somebody help me!”

“There’s no one around”, Daisuke replied, calmly. “Everyone has gone to the palace, answering the Queen’s summons. They are all there listening to Satoko tell her story. Well. Let’s begin, shall we.”

Daisuke picked up a hook, and examined it. He put it down, then picked up a hot poker, staring at it with the same focused attention.

“I think this one is a good start.”

Javier’s eyes widened as he realized that as he was talking, Daisuke had been laying various torture devices on the bed, neatly arranged. Javier tried to gather his thoughts for his last few moments of clarity.

“Yuzuru!” Javier screamed. “If you can somehow hear me, please know this isn’t your fault! None of it is!”

Then he closed his eyes tightly and surrendered to the pain.

He did not see how, mere moments later – although it seemed like an eternity of pain to Javier – a sharp sword was surreptitiously removed from among the torture instruments on the bed.

Daisuke did not see it either, too busy watching Javier, too focused on how the meat of his chest sizzled under the touch of the hot poker, how the beads of sweat gathered on his forehead, and his pleas gave way to incoherent shrieks.

The sword flickered only for a second in the light of the candle, and then Daisuke’s head flew right off his shoulders, landing with a thud in the corner of the small chamber. The headless body remained upright for a few moments, hands still clenching and unclenching on the hot poker, as if it might somehow still continue the gruesome task. Then, it went rigid, and toppled over with a thud. Yuzuru, face horribly pale and eyes entirely dark, kicked it aside, with no more concern than if it were a sack of potatoes.

Javier opened his eyes, groaning – the sudden lack of pain was as unsettling as its hideous presence, making him fear what came next . His tormented mind conjured the image of Daisuke choosing yet another instrument of torture, and when his bleary vision finally focused, he thought he saw Yuzuru ben ding over him. Yuzuru reached for his hands and swiftly untied Javier, rubbing soothingly at the angry red marks on his wrists. His hands freed, Javier clung to Yuzuru on instinct, while Yuzuru held him close, shushing him, and caressing his curls. A clean cloth was pressed lightly against his hot forehead, wiping at the beads of sweat. Javier thought for sure he must be dreaming, on his way to the River of No Return.

“I’m crossing over to the other side already?” Javier mumbled. “The gods are merciful to me”, he whispered gratefully, “for allowing me the sight of you, like this, for one last time.”

“Shhh, Javi, don’t talk!” Yuzuru answered sternly. “I’m taking care of you, and you’re not crossing anywhere! You’re mine and I won’t let anything happen to you. Remember?”

Javier chuckled faintly, and the chuckle turned into a wet cough that almost choked him. Yuzuru hurried to lift him in an upright position, Javier a deadweight against him. He gasped in pain as the shift made his fresh wound throb. Yuzuru winced as he took a good look at it.

“A healer needs to take care of this”, he murmured, still caressing Javier. “But if I call someone, we’ll be separated again.”

“Mmm”, Javier agreed. Then in the faint light of the room, he glimpsed Daisuke’s severed head. A chill of dread went right through him, and his teeth began to chatter. “Yuzuru… what did you do?”

“What I had to”, Yuzuru answered, clearly.

Javier pulled back slightly, to look into Yuzuru’s eyes. In the shadows of the room, Yuzuru looked ghostly.

“He… Daisuke told me that you could not come to my rescue, that he made sure of it… what did he do to you?” Javier asked, trembling all over.

“He was wrong, Javi. I did come to your rescue, did I not?

“Yuzuru, tell me! Tell me everything! Oh gods, you killed him, what will happen now, what will happen to you, to us?”

“Javi, I’m so sorry you were hurt like this. I should have got here sooner. Shhh. Everything will be alright.”

“No, it won’t be, it won’t be! It is because of me you killed one of your own! Who will understand, who will forgive! …. Yuzuru, we need to run away. Let’s leave this cursed land, we will go back to my homeland, I promise everyone will welcome us there and---”

Yuzuru placed a cold finger over Javier’s lips, silencing him.

“Shhh. Rest, Javi. I will call a healer for you. You’re hurt, and you have a bad fever.”

“No, don’t leave! Let’s get out of here together… We’ll get a carriage, go back to the fields… We have unfinished business there… Yuzuru, why is it so dark in here? Can you light more candles, please? Yuzuru, where were you? Why did Daisuke tell me you could not possibly come to rescue me? Oh, what will the council say? They will probably sentence us both to death… And Keiji… But no, Daisuke killed Keiji. And now Daisuke is dead, too! Yuzuru, you killed him because of me, what will the Queen say? We need to get rid of the body, we have to run away! Quick, before they find it! Yuzuru, how did you come to rescue me, Daisuke said you won’t be able to do it…. Yuzuru….? Please, I can’t see you, I need more light…!”

“Javi, don’t ask for more light, don’t ask to see me… Let’s just sit like this for a while.”

Javier had never in his life felt more cold. He was sure now that death was near. It felt good to have Yuzuru close to him in those moments, hear hi s soft whispers, and feel his gentle caresses.

“I knew you’d come”, Javier whispered back, reassured.

“I couldn’t leave you to such a fate.”

“Yes. Daisuke said he wanted to drive you mad. He wanted to use me against you. I changed my mind. It’s good you killed him”, Javier said, seriously. “We’ll make it out of this somehow. I just need a little time to get back on my feet, and then we’ll ride far, far away from here.”

Yuzuru didn’t reply, but his fingers never stopped caressing Javier.

“I don’t need a healer, as long as you’re touching me like that”, Javier slurred, contently. “But Yuzu – how did you manage to escape?”

Yuzuru looked at him sadly.

“I didn’t, Javi. Daisuke trapped me in a dungeon under his dwelling. No one would think to look for me there. I’m still trapped in that dungeon. You’re speaking to a manifestation of my spirit driven by my will, an ikiryō, a living ghost. It was the only way I could get my revenge on Daisuke and rescue you.”

Javier could only answer with shocked silence, staring at Yuzuru and shaking his head.

“I have heard of such stories, and I knew it could be done”, Yuzuru continued, “if only one had the desire and the unbreakable will. My love for you and my rage for Daisuke made the disembodiment easy, so here I am, less immaterial that I feared that I would be. I did what I had to do. I could wield a sword, I could touch you. Only now, I don’t know how to go back. I only want to stay here with you, Javi. There is nothing pulling me back there, in that dungeon.”

Javier’s teeth were still chattering, but he struggled to speak:

“Where is that dungeon? We’ll go there together, Yuzu.”

Yuzuru stilled him with a hand on his chest. His touch was freezing.

“No, Javi. It’s too dangerous. I have to go alone. I’ll find my way, don’t worry.”

Yuzuru kissed him, and faded from sight.

Chapter Text

Yuzuru was struggling in the darkness. For a moment, he thought he might be back in the dungeon – what if he had, in fact, been trapped in the dungeon all this time, and the murder of Daisuke and rescue of Javier was in fact his fever dream? What if he was, all this time, struggling to escape, and this was nothing more but a trick of his desperate mind, making him think he had succeeded? The darkness was a little too deep – too cloying. Was he wandering further and further into a nightmare? Yuzuru unexpectedly remembered Keiji’s words about the goddess. Was this how she felt, too? Keiji said she was weaving a nightmare for them, but what if the nightmare was trapping her as well? Dead asleep in her tomb, she’d be trying to awaken, but the terrifying dream would become more and more tangled with each attempt.

Yuzuru thought he could feel the cold stone pressing on his temple.

No, I need to go back!

But Javier was rescued, his work was done.

But Javier still needs me!

He could watch over Javier from afar.

Yuzuru felt weary, consumed, his will was leaving him. The last of his strength was exhausted on saving Javier. It would be so easy and so soothing to just let himself drift – away from it all. It would be so freeing. No more danger, no more toil – just lasting rest and peace, at last.

The darkness around him was no longer threatening – it felt soothing like a soft blanket pressing comfortably on him, easing him into a deep sleep.

But then, at the edge of his vision, shadows appeared. Yuzuru recognized them as spectres - like him. He was moving in their world now. Most of them were entirely caught up in their own world, without any concern for their surroundings, staring only ahead with unseeing eyes. But some of them seemed to recognize Yuzuru – they nodded at him gravely, and passed on.

Yuzuru could do nothing but drift by, aimlessly, through the darkness. He did not know how to return to the dungeon, to his body lying there in chains; and he did not know how to leave this world entirely, too much of his consciousness and desire trapping him in the world of the living.

And then, one of the shadows roaming around him paused, and approached Yuzuru. From the energy sent forth from the spectre’s pale form, Yuzuru recognized his father, Shuzo. Yuzuru stopped as well, allowing the warmth of his father’s energy to surround him like a soothing embrace.

“My son”, Shuzo said, “why are you here? It is not your time.”

“I want to stay here with you”, Yuzuru answered, the words pouring out of him unbidden.

He had always missed his father, there was always an emptiness in his life that could have been filled by his love.

But Shuzo shook his head.

“It is not our fate to meet so soon outside the borders of the world. You are here by accident, are you not?”

Yuzuru stubbornly refused to answer.

“When you gave your life to rescue me, did you think then it was not your time?” he asked instead, petulantly.

But Shuzo did not get angry, he merely smiled at Yuzuru, with the same warmth.

“I see now what this is about”, he said, lightly. “My young son blames me for getting myself killed. Maybe you even resent me?”

“No!” Yuzuru replied, horrified. “How could I resent you for saving my life?”

“And yet, somehow, a part of you does. The same part that suffers from feelings of guilt maybe?” Shuzo inquired, shrewdly. “You see, I can see things much more clearly now when I’m no longer bound by the mortal world.”

Yuzuru merely shrugged.

“Even if it was by accident, I am glad to have met you here, Yuzuru”, Shuzo said. “It is only a short meeting for now, but I have to tell you something important before we part. I have always valued my life. And yet when I set off to rescue you and the other children, I knew I would never return. My heart was torn that day. I did not want to leave you and your mother, and I hated myself for the suffering my death would inflict on you. But I also knew I could not live with myself in peace, had I not made that choice. It was not an easy choice, but it was the only one I could make and stay true to myself. And I have never regretted it, not even in the moment of death. And you - you have repaid me for that choice tenfold – you have proven me right by growing up the young man that you are, Yuzuru. I am so proud of you.”

Shuzo’s voice enveloped Yuzuru like in a shroud of peace. It spoke directly to Yuzuru’s hidden fears, laying them to rest. If he had tears as an ikiryō, he would cry – but they would be cleansing tears.

“I wish I could stay here with you”, Yuzuru could only repeat, like a stubborn child. “I miss you too, and I love you.”

Shuzo was still smiling at him, but his form was now thinner, more transparent, trembling as if it would soon fade.

“In my state, Yuzuru, wishes and desires hold little sway”, he said. “They are like overly warm clothes on a sunny weather: burdensome, and soon to be relinquished. Yet if I have one wish, it is to see you value your life more. Please do not linger here – go back! Your time is not yet come, and your work is not yet done! Our people need you!”

“But how do I go back?” Yuzuru asked, desperately.

But Shuzo was already fading from his sight, leaving only the glimmer of starlight behind.

“Goodbye, father”, Yuzuru whispered. “I will obey your wish.”

But how to go back? The agonizing pull of his spirit out of his body was driven by his desperate desire to help Javier; how could he use the same drive to pull him back to his battered body chained in the dungeon? There was nothing waiting for him there, only pain.

My people need me, Yuzuru tried to tell himself. I must go back.

Yet apparently it was not enough to sway him.

There must be something for me to hang on to – something to draw me back to my body, down in that filthy dungeon! Anything magic… like an amulet… oh – oh of course!”

Like a lightning strike through his mind, Yuzuru remembered the swan brooch that Javier had given him after the binding ritual – a piece of jewellery from his mother that Javier deeply cherished. It now lay pressed against Yuzuru’s chest in the dungeon. It would not do well for Javier to peel it off his dead body, and take it back. It would then be twice tainted with the sorrow of loss.

Yuzuru’s stray thoughts focused on the brooch, remembering the sight and feel of it – its delicate beauty infused with so much meaning, and Javier’s eyes resting softly on him as he told Yuzuru its story. Javier’s voice came to him from the past, like growing ripples on a previously quiet stream: “I’m placing it in your keeping, and you are something I must also treasure and guard with my life.”

At once, Yuzuru felt himself irresistibly drawn back, the pull of it so sudden it was physically painful, like he was swallowed by a roaring wave, that he could not fight even if he tried.

With a shuddering gasp, Yuzuru found himself back in his body, staring at the stone walls of the dungeon where he was still chained and trapped.

Now he could only wait, and hope in silence to be rescued.

*

The royal council was in an uproar after Satoko had finished her story.

“I do not think we can afford to pay more tributes!” a woman said, decisively.

“Nor me!” another one chimed in.

“It is unthinkable!” a young man agreed. “We will die out as a people!”

“Maybe Keiji was right, maybe awakening the goddess is the only path left open to us, if we want to survive!” an older woman wailed.

“Nonsense! I’m tired of all this mystical talk, placing our hope in a divine power, to keep us from going crazy from the painful grinding of everyday existence! There’s no one looking out for us!”

“Have a care, Takeru! You are close to blasphemy!”

“So what if I am? So far nothing has proven me wrong. The goddess?” Takeru spat on the ground. “Just a slab of stone.”

“But we know she has awakened before”, Akiko spoke carefully.

“Yes, and from who? A gathering of senile hags who barely remember what they’ve done yesterday? I wouldn’t put so much stock on their words. Who’s to say this isn’t just another one of those stories that people make up just to feel better about waking up tomorrow?”

“Plenty of people doubt the goddess these days,” Akiko agreed. “But if we quench all hope, then we might as well indeed choose not to wake up tomorrow.”

“Akiko is right”, Shizuka intervened. “Regardless of what we feel or believe, we have a duty to the people, and even if we do not rely on any divine intervention, we still have to fight. We still have to search for a way out of danger.”

“I must admit I understand how Keiji must have felt”, an old man said, quietly. “Trying to end it all with a last grand act of defiance, if only to escape the axe perpetually poised over our heads. It must have felt liberating, if only for a few precious moments.”

“Keiji was mad”, a younger woman snapped. “And selfish. He didn’t want to end things just for himself, he wanted to draw everything and everyone in his act of destruction. He spilled blood in the citadel, to lure the Wyrdexins here and bring death to us all.”

“Yes, because like a fool he believed in the story of the goddess!” Takeru spoke up again, vindicated. “He wanted to bring things to the point where she would finally have to wake! But did she wake? Answer me, did she rise? No, like she did not wake when the children were dying! The slab did not move! So I was right! You know that I am right!”

“Alas for you blaspheming, young and foolish ones! Lest she does wake up and strike us all dead!”

Cries sprung all around, and were answered from the courtyard below. The people seemed ready to fight each other, those who believed in the goddess just as incensed about proving their belief as those who shunned her and questioned her existence were keen to persuade everyone that there was no use hoping.

Shizuka rose from her seat, calling for silence.

“Quiet!” she thundered – her voice reverberating through the entire courtyard. I feel it is time to tell you all something that I have kept a secret until now.”

A hush fell over the crowd immediately. Shizuka allowed her gaze to roam not only over the members of the council, but also over the people gathered in the courtyard. They were all watching her with bated breath. Secretly, and against all reason, they all hoped as one that their Queen would reveal something that would grant them salvation, something that would turn their luck around.

Shizuka sat back down and looked listlessly over the crowd, her gaze sweeping over all, yet seeing no one.

“In the days of the tributes”, she began, “after my mother died and I ascended to the throne, not a day went by when I did not beg the goddess to put an end to our gruesome fate. I went to her grave, as my mother did, and asked for help, for the merest sign, anything that I could turn into the light of hope. When I felt particularly desperate, I even begged her to wake up.”

The people listening to her calm yet powerful voice bowed their heads in understanding. This was nothing that they themselves did not do – or their parents before them. But the Queen had the greater, burdensome responsibility.

Shizuka went on:

“It felt to me, with each passing day, that we cannot go on like this. But the goddess did not stir, and somehow, we did go on like this. Then one night, I had a strange dream. It seemed that the goddess had awoken, as I had requested, but it wasn’t really her. It was someone else, unrecognizable to everyone save to myself – sitting among us, sharing our food, working the land, and fighting alongside us. Only I knew, in my dream, that the goddess was with us, and I could not understand why the others did not recognize her. When I woke up, I struggled to make sense of the dream. I couldn’t understand it, but it gave me hope. It was the first such sign that I received. But only a couple of days later, I felt sick and when I went to the healer, I received the news that I was a month pregnant. This was incredible to me, because I had taken all the precautions. Like many others, I did not want to get pregnant and risk my children becoming tributes. But after days spent torn between joy and despair, I thought I finally understood the dream. Maybe the goddess had decided to lend her spirit through my child, and bring me the divine help I asked for in this way. The goddess could not wake because the citadel was not poised to fall, but she understood our plight and her spirit would guide us to victory, through my child. And so, I started to believe the child growing inside me would somehow save us.”

In the courtyard, as well as in the council room, such silence reigned that one could hear a pin drop. People held their breath, as they hung on to the queen’s every word. Shizuka shook her head with a gentle laugh.

“Isn’t that the dream of any mother? That her child is special, and might save the world? Since I wholeheartedly believed my dream was real, I was sure that I would have a daughter. Only a daughter would be worthy to carry the flame of the goddess. She would be a strong leader, who will make better decisions than all the queens before her. But then, Yuzuru was born, and I questioned everything. Perhaps I was wrong. Maybe I gave birth to a normal child, who was just unfortunate to be born under such circumstances. Even when I had every reason to doubt, some measure of hope remained, and when I gambled for Yuzuru’s life by asking you to decide if he lived or died, I was in fact asking the goddess for another sign. If the child was in some way a tool of her divine hand, she might choose to act now and save him. Or maybe, as a mother, I had to make the ultimate sacrifice for my people – I must sacrifice my child, and then our suffering would end. Such contradicting thoughts I had in my madness. But still the goddess did not stir, and Yuzuru did not die, yet with the price of more human lives. Indeed his father died to save him, as did other folk I cherished. And even then there was a part of me that thought this must be somehow the will of the goddess.”

Shizuka smiled, and looked from one to another, shrugging. The people were frowning, and muttering to each other, not understanding the point of this confession.

“Do you see now?” she said, almost derisively. “How fragile hope is, for every one of us, and how we all cling to any event as the one that will finally bring about the end of their suffering?”

She paused, letting those words sink in. The people fidgeted, recognizing the truth of what the Queen had said. After all, they had themselves hoped she might tell them something that might fortuitously save them. Shizuka smiled again, then continued:

“So when I see you argue today that the goddess will save us, or the goddess can’t save us, be it this, or that – all I hear is one single voice crying out for an end to our suffering. And rest assured that I hear each and every one of you; I hear you even if the goddess does not. She may not awaken, but you still have me. I have not abandoned my faith, but I am no longer waiting for divine intervention to save me. I will do everything in my, albeit not supernatural powers to save us. Or I will die with you.”

There was no more muttering among the people now. They all looked at Shizuka, and saw her, in those moments, like a goddess. Surely she had the allure and strength of one – there was something impervious and steely in her eyes, and in her voice. They felt it like a balm on their inflamed senses – her wisdom and her resolve was both calming and empowering. She spoke the truth, even if it was harsh. Such was their fate, and they would not meet it like cowards, beating their fists against immovable stone statues or cursing their lot.

“To guard a city that can’t be guarded, to fight a battle that can’t be won…”, someone began, loud and clear in the silence.

“- This is the fate of heroes!” the crowd shouted as one. “This is the fate of heroes!” they chanted again, taking strength from the familiar words.

*

After Yuzuru had faded from his sight, Javier had experienced a moment of pure panic. He sat up in his cot, and wanted to rush straight to the dungeon where Yuzuru was imprisoned. But he did not know where it was and he couldn’t waste precious time searching. He must go to the palace, he must speak to the Queen. Surely she would understand – wise and kind as she was, she would understand everything. Even if Daisuke was one of her husbands and royal advisors, his actions regarding Yuzuru alone could not be pardoned. After taking this decision, Javier spent a few torturous moments just trying to take a few steps across the room. This would not work, he realized despairingly. Reaching the palace in his state would take a lifetime.

Slowly, using the walls for support, he finally stumbled outside, dizzy and shaking all over. The wound from the hot poker burned viciously with every pull of his tired muscles. The doors had been mercifully left open for him. Javier remembered what Daisuke had told him – everyone was at the palace, they had all been summoned. Daisuke had entered with no fear of being discovered, and now Javier could make his way out in the same way. Outside, the cobbled street looked deserted. Javier called out weakly, not expecting a reply. He was surprised to realize he still had a voice – he had expected to only manage a whisper. Feeling some measure of strength return to him, Javier suddenly got an idea how to reach the palace faster. It was a little insane, and it would most likely break additional rules, but he could see no other way. He took a deep breath. Then he placed two fingers in his mouth and whistled, as loud as he could. Considering his wrecked state, he supposed he managed well enough for a first try. He had heard the whistle call enough times by now to be familiar with it, but it was the first time he used it himself.

Javier waited, looking around hopefully. The Yilians had clever, well trained horses, and if Javier’s call was within earshot of one, that horse might answer the summons, even if Javier was a stranger. But minutes passed, and no one came. Undaunted, Javier leaned back against the wall, filled his lungs with air, and whistled again – this time louder. And then one more time, for good measure. He decided he would spend this last breath whistling until someone heard him, be it animal or human. Soon his efforts were rewarded – he could hear the sound of hooves in the distance. Javier’s face lit up in a relieved smile, which only widened when he saw which horse had answered the call – it was his own Haru.

“You came! You came for me, Haru! I’m so happy to see you, girl!” Javier greeted her, enthusiastically, patting her mane, but then his excitement died down as he realized there was no way he could mount the horse unaided. “I’m an idiot”, he muttered.

Haru puffed and stomped her feet, impatiently, as she waited for Javier to mount. Then she seemed to understand Javier’s trouble, and leaned over, bending her front knees until they were on the ground, like in a deep bow. Then she extended her neck towards Javier, nudging him. It was easier for Javier to try to get on now. He grabbed Haru around the neck, trying to hang on to her mane, and finally managed to straddle the horse.

“Good girl!” Javier praised her, patting her gently. “You’re the best girl, Haru. Now let’s go – to the palace!”

Javier steered her, and Haru set off at a gallop.

Javier only had to hang on, and soon, he could see the white marble steps of the palace gleaming in the sunlight. As he got closer, he could hear people in the courtyard chanting – or roaring, as if preparing for battle. Javier had no idea what was happening, nor did he care. All he could think of was that he needed to reach the Queen as soon as possible, and tell her that Yuzuru was trapped in Daisuke’s dungeon. Javier did not want to think of the possibility that Yuzuru’s spirit did not make it back. Even so, Javier fervently hoped, healers and mages might be able to bring a wayward spirit back to a hale body.

The mood of the crowd in the courtyard was swayed, from suspicion and uncertainty to bravery. They were now all chanting as one. However, Shizuka frowned, as if a sudden unsettling thought had wormed its way into her mind. She looked around purposefully, as if searching for something or someone, and then asked, sharply:

“Where is Daisuke? Did I not make it plain that I wanted everyone here - unless they were bed-ridden, wounded or otherwise unable to make the journey? … Well? Where is he?”

The royal advisors looked around, then at each other, surprised by the conspicuous absence of someone so noteworthy, and even more surprised that they had not noticed it until now. Under the Queen’s intense gaze, they all shook their heads. No one could account for Daisuke’s absence.

Shizuka narrowed her eyes.

“I think I can answer that question”, came a voice from across the courtyard.

Everyone turned to look, and then gasped in surprise at the sight of Javier, bloody and battered, barely hanging on to the neck of his horse. They began muttering again among themselves, while Shizuka hastily called for healers.

“Take him inside!” she commanded, sternly. “Yes, inside! Don’t hesitate, and pay no mind to the blood! Just help him down from the horse and tend to his injuries.”

“There’s no time”, Javier gasped. “Queen Shizuka – your son – Yuzuru, he is being held captive. Daisuke – trapped in his dungeon”, Javier stumbled over the words, in a hurry to get the information out as fast as possible.

“What?” several royal advisors had risen and were now shaking their heads in disbelief.

“The stranger is raving mad!”

“Does he really think he can buy his freedom with lies?”

“How would he even know this?”

“Wasn’t he ordered to remain in the Sealed Rooms?”

“Yes! He’s broken the rules again!”

Javier looked from one to the other helplessly, seeing only suspicious faces.

“I’m not lying”, he said, tiredly, as he was brought down from his horse. “Daisuke came to the Sealed Rooms to torture me. He told me himself what he has done to Yuzuru.”

Shizuka did not linger to listen to her advisors. As soon as Javier had mentioned Yuzuru, she was already making her way across the courtyard in a hurry. Having reached Javier, she took a few moments to give him a piercing, assessing look. Whatever she saw in his face put to rest all lingering doubts that he might be lying.

“Shoma, Riku!” Shizuka called, urgently. “Follow me immediately to Daisuke’s house. Take the swiftest horses!”

Then Shizuka threw herself in Haru’s saddle and was off, before the people could even recover from their shock.

Javier keeled over in relief, supported only by the arms of the healers around him. He did not care that he was surrounded only by unfriendly faces, as long as help was reaching Yuzuru. His mission ended, Javier could now surrender to the welcoming darkness already creeping at the edge of his vision.

Javier woke up in a bed – he had almost forgotten what sleeping in an actual bed was like; and the one he was currently lying in was soft, with clean smelling sheets that were crisp and cool to touch. He allowed himself a few moments to simply enjoy it. Gradually, he remembered the moments before he lost consciousness, and he sat upright, looking around.

He was in a beautiful room, elegant and tastefully decorated, if a little sparsely. Javier had no memory of being taken to this room. Yet he must have been here for some time, because he felt clear-headed and he could move much better. He could feel his temple was still tightly wrapped, but it no longer hurt. Javier put his hand to his chest. The wound from Daisuke’s hot poker still hurt to touch, but it no longer felt raw and burning.

“You’re awake”, came a voice, and Javier jumped.

Yuzuru stepped from behind a privacy screen in the corner, and approached Javier’s bed. Javier made no reply at first, he simply watched Yuzuru hungrily. It seemed to him ages since they last saw each other. Javier’s fingers itched to touch him, but for now he settled just to look at him. Yuzuru looked pale and drawn, but his gaze on Javier was sweet and tender.

“How did you… get back?” Javier asked. “Was it difficult? Tell me everything.”

Yuzuru sat down on the edge of the bed. He placed his palm on Javier’s chest, a little below the wound, right over his heart. Javier’s gaze dropped to Yuzuru’s elegant fingers, his wrist adorned by his usual bracelets. Among them, Javier spotted a new one, a simple string, and on it, the silver swan brooch that Javier gave him.

“I’m having a new string made for it”, Yuzuru explained, following Javier’s gaze. “A silver chain, made by a skilled craftsman, one that befits its beauty. Do you know – it saved me.”

“Saved you?” Javier wondered. “How?”

“It helped me get back”, Yuzuru said, touching the swan brooch reverently. “I thought about it, and about what it meant to you, and then I thought of it lying pressed against my chest in the dungeon. My spirit did not want to abandon it, so it got pulled back.”

Javier sighed briefly.

“So that’s how it was. Did it… did it hurt?”

“It hurt less than what Daisuke did to you, Javi. I will not forgive him, even in death.”

“It is just a bit of pain”, Javier said, quickly, to dispel Yuzuru’s angry frown. “And a lasting scar of course, but we all have our share of battle scars. You arrived just in time to save me.”

“I should have arrived sooner”, Yuzuru said, mournfully, and Javier wanted to shake him.

“Stop this”, he ordered. “Rather tell me, how was Daisuke’s death received.”

Yuzuru shrugged.

“Some were angry, and still are. Others are happy. Daisuke had many enemies, but he was also shrewd enough to make several allies. But the Queen stripped him of all royal titles and buried him without ceremony. She has decided that Daisuke has betrayed not only the royal line, but also the people of the citadel, and he has no place among us. His ashes were not laid to rest in our graveyard, in line with the Tomb of the Goddess. Instead they were buried in a small mound outside the citadel grounds. The place of burial is only marked ‘Traitor’.”

“And his death will not be… investigated?”

“I already confessed”, Yuzuru said, calmly.

“I see”, Javier said, relieved. “Since Daisuke was revealed to be a murderer and a traitor, you will not be punished for the crime.”

Yuzuru smiled sadly, and said nothing.

“Yuzuru…?” Javier prodded. “Will you be punished?”

“You know, Javi? I think I would rather wear the swan brooch on my wrist. Do you know why? Because it is so beautiful and the sight of it fills me with joy. If I wear it around my neck, even if it is close to my heart, I do not see it.”

“Yuzuru!” Javier raised his voice. “Will you be punished?”

“Javi… would you be upset if I did not keep my promise?” Yuzuru whispered. Javier merely stared at him, speechless. “ -to wear the swan brooch pressed against my heart, I mean.”

Javier felt a strange premonition assail him – of danger and loss unlike any before. Without even thinking, he grabbed Yuzuru and manoeuvred him on the bed, pressing his body on top of his, breathing fast and shallow, desire and panic mingled unbearably. Yuzuru went easy, allowing Javier to undress him swiftly, with wild disregard for reason or decorum. Javier found his urgency matched as Yuzuru clutched at him desperately enough to leave marks, lips and even teeth fighting for possession of his body. Yuzuru traced with reverence the scars – old and new, on Javier’s body, and shivered when his own scars were similarly touched and kissed. They tumbled together on the bed, clinging and worshipping their bodies, dizzy with pleasure and lust. Hours passed without them getting their fill, grappling for dominance and constantly driven by the desire for closeness. Finally, they lay there, almost spent but still unwilling to disengage, eyes hazy and hair tousled, sweaty and glowing. Yuzuru writhed in Javier’s hold, like he wanted to get away, but when he parted his kiss-swollen lips, he pleaded:

“More. I want more.”

He opened his legs and trapped Javier between them.

Javier looked at him for a few long moments in the flickering light of the candles. He loved Yuzuru so much in that moment, it was almost painful – the image of him lying there beautifully earnest in his demands, and craving the pleasure that he had been denying himself for so long. The naked, raw desire in Yuzuru’s eyes made Javier feel almost undeserving of such blind devotion, such trust.

“Please, Javi”, Yuzuru begged again, as if Javier needed convincing.

“Yes”, Javier managed, stricken. “Yes, Yuzu. Anything you want. Yours.”

Yuzuru smiled, reassured.

Javier used fragrant oils and fingered him until he was loose and mewling, despite Yuzuru’s repeated claims that he could take a bit of pain, and in fact he did not mind pain at all. Javier shushed him with hard, angry kisses, and replied that they had both had enough pain lately – tonight there would be none of that. But, he added, the pleasure that he would make Yuzuru feel would be so intense, it might at some point register as pain.

“You will tell me if it’s too much”, Javier said, voice heavy with promise, and Yuzuru shook his head wildly, and voiced his own promise:

“Never too much. Never too much of you, Javi.”

So Javier took him, again and again, and again, swallowing Yuzuru’s sharp bird-like cries and holding him captive to his caresses, hoping to allay their hunger, but the yearning was only made sharper with each time it was satisfied. It seemed that it was their curse or their blessing to never have enough of each other, and only exhaustion made them fall asleep in each other’s arms just before dawn.

Javier should have known that something was wrong, because Yuzuru had let him so easily. There was no mention of indulgence and duty, no token protests, there was only instant surrender, and unrestrained desire. But Javier was so weak with love, and so high on finally getting to have what he wanted for so long, that he fell into a deep satisfied sleep immediately, and thought nothing of it.

When Javier woke up a few hours later, his arms were empty. He sat up, and looked around, only to see Yuzuru was still in the room. He had awakened before Javier and was now almost fully dressed. Javier sighed in relief, and leaned back comfortably. Yuzuru finished tying his obi around his waist, and looked up straight at Javier.

“Good morning”, Javier said, smiling at him lazily, and somewhat sheepishly. “Did you sleep well?”

There was no trace of coyness on Yuzuru’s face, as it might have been after such a night. Instead, he looked even more pale and troubled than yesterday, the lack of sleep adding dark circles underneath his eyes.

“I cannot hide this from you any longer, Javi”, Yuzuru began. “The criminal law in Yilia is simple and clear. Any Yilian who kills another is to be put to death. We are all raised to believe that life is sacred, especially the life of our own people. After all, there are so few of us left. The Queen has no choice but to respect the law, even if I am her son, and even if Daisuke had brought it upon himself. With everything that has been happening, the people are volatile, and if the Queen was to grant me an undue favour, some might choose to rebel. We cannot afford to have people divided now, at such a crucial time, when the very existence of Yilia is in grave peril.”

Javier opened his mouth to speak, but Yuzuru went on smoothly:

“However, under the circumstances, my mother has argued that instead of wasting another life entirely by giving me a meaningless death, it is better to send me on an errand so dangerous that it will lead to certain death. In this way, the law will be obeyed, and I could die fulfilling my duty to my people. I have accepted this gladly. In fact, it is all that I ever wanted, Javi. Please understand.”

There was a stunned silence as Javier processed this. Then he nodded:

“I understand, Yuzuru. Don’t worry”, he said, soothingly. “If this is our fate, then so be it. I hope you understand that you cannot be rid of me. We will go together. If you refuse me, I will just follow you. Either way, I will end up in the same place where you go.”

“I know, Javi”, Yuzuru said, in a small, defeated voice. “It is because I know that I must take you with me that I am so miserable. You deserve so much better than this – you deserve safety, and sunlight, and peace. But while you have been here, you were only witness and prey to danger, darkness and violence. You have brought so much joy into my life, but what have I brought to you? Only bad luck, and now I am to bring death as well? Daisuke’s evil truly outlives him – the binding ritual that he insisted we should take will be your doom!”

Yuzuru’s lips trembled, and he turned away, which disgruntled Javier even more than his words. They had been so close, Javier had known Yuzuru intimately, and Yuzuru still felt he needed to hide from him. Javier stood up resolutely, and grabbed Yuzuru’s shoulders, looking into his face, now wet with tears.

“You will not hide your tears from me”, he spoke, sternly. “You will not hide anything from me.”

“You don’t have to be burdened with-”, Yuzuru began.

Javier cupped his face in his palms.

“Look at me. Listen to me, Yuzuru. I am not doing this because of a damned oath I took. I want you to know that I would do it anyway. Not only for you, but for anyone that has earned my loyalty and trust, and friendship. This is just who I am. So please, do not think of me as bound. Think of me as free, and tying my fate to yours willingly. I will go into danger and death with you, because I choose to do it. Because I came here to serve your cause. And because of who you are. Yuzuru, you are a person who has earned the loyalty of your people, not only by your royal blood, but because of your courage, skill, and determination. I am surely not the only one who would follow you all the way into peril.”

Yuzuru stared at Javier with wide shining eyes. He looked so young and trusting, that Javier’s heart squeezed with tenderness for him. He brushed at Yuzuru’s tears with the pads of his fingers, and cradled his head to his chest, allowing Yuzuru to cry to his heart’s content.

“You are everything to me, Yuzu. You are my beloved, and also the warrior I fight with side by side”, Javier said, and somehow he managed through these words to hit on precisely the right way to appease Yuzuru’s tormented mind.

There was a new resolution and a fresh glow in Yuzuru’s face as he finally pulled back to look at Javier. With a grim smile, he nodded and said:

“You are everything to me as well, Javi. I am honoured that you are willing to walk side by side with me in death.”

He bowed deeply, reminding Javier of the day when he first met Yuzuru. Just as he did then, Javier bowed back, then straightened to look at Yuzuru with a bright smile.

Their hands clasped and held, in promise and in bonding.

Yuzuru and Javier left the citadel at dawn on the following day. There was no one throwing flowers in their path this time, no one seeing them off. Those who heard noises looked out from their windows and watched them pass, along with the strange cortège that followed them. But no one called out to them, to bid them farewell, or good fortune, not even those who were moved by their plight, because no one expected them to ever return. Even if victory was somehow gained, their death was quite certain.

The next day, Shizuka summoned Takeshi and Yuma.

“You are to go back to the Fields immediately”, she said.

They nodded, as if they had expected as much, but then Shizuka went on:

“You are to call everyone there back to the Citadel. Tell them to leave the Fields, and bring all provisions and animals with them. No secrecy will be needed on the road. We want to lure the Wyrdexins here, as many of them. We will make a last stand in the Citadel, while an even more perilous mission is attempted elsewhere.”

After they left, Shizuka made her way slowly on her balcony, to gaze over the courtyard, and further away, down the cobbled streets, and over the battlements – a city made into a fortress soon to meet the challenge it was built for. She had many thoughts and fears in that moment, but strangely, there was no fear or grief for Yuzuru’s fate. Mother and son had said their farewells, without any witnesses to the parting that might be their last. There had been tears then, but there was no despair.

Even now, Shizuka could not shake off her feeling that the fate of the citadel was somehow tied to Yuzuru’s own.

Chapter Text

As many people in the citadel had guessed, Yuzuru and Javier had set out for the Wyrdexins’ nests.

They were the only two people setting forth, but they were not alone. Following behind the horses they were riding, Haru and Hope, a train of animals followed.

They were Daisuke’s creatures, who had been trained to obey a human hand, but kept locked in his dungeons, only displayed when it suited him to flaunt his wealth and abilities to impressionable guests. The unfortunate people who happened to cross Daisuke, or whom Daisuke needed out of the way to further his ambitions, were to find themselves bleeding in such a dungeon, at the mercy of such a creature. Drawn to blood, the starved beasts would devour them. Otherwise, the animals were mostly kept hungry, to increase their appetite for human flesh. When Shizuka and her companions arrived to Daisuke’s dungeons, and broke down the gates to rescue Yuzuru, they found many such creatures in such a poor state as to be almost dead. After Yuzuru was rescued, Shizuka ordered to have the human skeletons found in cells taken out and given proper funeral rites. Some were still carrying trinkets such as beads or amulets by which the families might recognize a lost relative. Many had suspected Daisuke of dark designs during his life, but neither could see coming the full extent of his cruelty and the lengths to which he had gone to secure power. Of the creatures that shared those cells, many only saw sunlight for the first time when they were rescued. They went meekly along where their handlers took them, warily sniffing at the fresh air, and squinting at the sun. There were several rare and marvellous beasts among them - chimeras, dragons, harpies, tengu, oni, and even a couple of wise Yatagarasu. All of them were well fed, bathed, and tended to. Shizuka gave orders for them not only to be well cared for, but also interacted with. Despite their pitiful state, the creatures were still trained to obey a firm hand, especially if it provided them with much-needed nourishment. Shizuka had a plan, the wheels of which were beginning to be set in motion, the unexpected discovery of the creatures a much-welcomed missing piece of a puzzle long in the making. The beasts would get as much respite as the humans, to mend themselves, before they rode out.

So now Yuzuru and Javier crossed to the fields, their magnificent parade behind them.

When darkness arrived, they went to sleep without fear. Naked, Yuzuru and Javier lay together, entwined, covered by the same blanket. They would listen to the peaceful puffs of breath and rustles from the creatures settling for the night, a comforting reassurance that they were safe.

Sometimes, Javier would brush his fingers against the swan brooch on the silver chain that Yuzuru never took off, even when he slept, seeking his own reassurance in their closeness. Sometimes he thought of his mother who had given it to him, and wondered if she would be happy to know Javier had found someone he loved to gift it to. He was sure his mother would approve – after all, what is a heirloom without the love attached to it? And if it is twice given in love, does it not become twice blessed? Trading kisses, they fell asleep, the scent of each other’s skin surrounding them.

They did not set a watch, because they knew they could rest easy in this company. No Wyrdexin could pierce the shield of so many magical creatures unnoticed. The Yatagarasu or three-legged crows proved especially useful for keeping guard, and for making sure the road was clear. They would fly ahead to scour the area, and their low gurgling croak would indicate that all was well. The birds would then descend and, cooing to each other, would pick a place to settle in their vicinity, but not too close. They were loyal, yet not overly friendly, a bit aloof, as if aware of their superiority to humans. Yuzuru and Javier would always greet them with respectful bows upon their return, thanking them, and the crows would briefly gurgle in acknowledgement.

They were two days into the ride when the crows decided to settle on Yuzuru and Javier’s shoulders as they rode, keeping them silent companionship. Javier gasped in awe, almost not daring to move, and chanced a look out of the corner of his eye at Yuzuru. At his side, Yuzuru glanced back at him, with a similarly surprised and excited look in his eyes. They both tried in vain to suppress their smiles.

“I am honoured”, Yuzuru finally said, “yet feel unworthy”, he added humbly.

“I—”, Javier began, and looked over at the bird resting steadily on his shoulder. The bird’s intelligent beady eyes returned his look. “I – me too”, he mumbled, intimidated.

This time, Yuzuru could not stifle a giggle.

“You know, Javi – I don’t think I ever told you, but our three-legged companions are wise beyond mortal knowledge. So much so that our people say of them their appearance is an omen of the will of Heaven or divine intervention in human affairs.”

“I am humbled that you choose to help us”, Javier told the bird, finally finding his words. “As you are so wise, I’m sure you know even better than us what awaits us. Indeed, it seems you even know things we do not.” The bird croaked in agreement. “You could just fly off to fend for yourselves, and yet you are here with us. We are grateful.”

“So grateful”, Yuzuru echoed with a bow. “May you be blessed until the end of time.”

The birds crooned, tightening their little claws on their shoulders.

At the end of the fourth day, they arrived to Patrick’s house with no incidents.

Patrick nodded to them, grim and unsmiling.

“Greetings, Patrick. I would welcome some of your ale”, Javier said, cheerfully.

Patrick merely stared at him.

“What news do you bring?” he asked coldly. “What is this cortege behind you?”

“These beasts will need to be housed in your stable for now. If the stable is not large enough to shelter all of them, bring some of them inside the hut. You will not be burdened with their care, we will feed and care for them, as we did along the way. Takeshi and Yuma are travelling here a day behind us. They have been instructed to summon everyone in the Fields back to the citadel,” Yuzuru informed him, shortly. “People, animals, and provisions.”

Patrick’s eyes widened.

“What? Why?”

“We know about the conspiracy between you and Daisuke”, Yuzuru told him, softly, unexpectedly changing the subject. “The Queen knows, too. But I imagine you already guessed as much when you saw me alive.”

Patrick scoffed:

“I don’t know what that moron Daisuke did, but whatever it was, I had nothing to do with it-”

“He’s dead”, Javier interrupted. “So is Keiji.”

This time, Patrick gasped.

“What- what happened?”

“Yuma confessed everything. The Queen forgave him because he is merely a boy. I imagine it was easy to prey on his innocence, you who are so wise, so he could be your trusted messenger back and forth. Just as easy as it was preying on Keiji’s fears. As for Daisuke, you took advantage of his ambitions. And so much strategising and so much planning, all to get me out of the way? Wouldn’t your big brain have been better employed dealing with our unbeatable enemies? Are you that starved for power, Patrick? Or do you think me so worthless?”

Patrick sighed.

“You are not meant to lead your people, Yuzuru. Even if you were fit to do it, you can’t…. You’re not…”, Patrick glanced at Javier, then seemed to change his mind, and shook his head. “Never mind.”

“I’m not what?” Yuzuru whispered fiercely. “Not good enough? Not strong enough?”

“...Not real enough”, Patrick murmured.

His tone was earnest for once instead of mocking, and Javier froze in fear hearing those strange words.

“What exactly do you mean by that?” he demanded.

Patrick merely shrugged and refused to say anything more.

“Are you here to take me back to the palace in chains?” he asked instead. “Or do you have instructions to execute me right here? If I have a choice, I would like to be spared the trip. Just strangle me quietly in the backyard like I did with Pooh-san.”

“You do have a choice”, Yuzuru answered smoothly, even as he flinched at the mention of Pooh-san. “If you choose to stay here, you will be put to death. If you join us, you can gain forgiveness through death.”

Patrick gave a mirthless chuckle.

“So my choice is between death, and death?” he asked.

“Something like that”, Yuzuru answered icily.

“It’s as good a deal as the prince himself got”, Javier informed him.

Patrick looked from one to the other, as if still trying to work out the meaning of a riddle.

“So…. Where are you two going, then?”

“To find and destroy the Wyrdexins’ nest. We are not going alone, as you notice, Daisuke’s menagerie is right behind us, to help locate the nests and raid them. I would say they are better employed like this than surviving off the meagre fare they got from devouring Daisuke’s enemies in the dungeons, don’t you think? Even if he did indeed have many enemies.”

Patrick ignored the question, and the sarcasm.

“So, you want me to come with you? With my lame leg and everything? I’d just slow you down.”

“You’re a good rider, Patrick. You won’t slow us down on the way there”, Yuzuru said, indulgently.

“What about when we get there?” Patrick asked shrewdly. “What’s the plan?”

“We’ll tell you when we get there”, Javier said.

Yuzuru nodded, approvingly.

“For now, we need to know your choice”, he said. “Go on a mission that may well be hopeless, or stay here until certain death finds you.”

Patrick closed his eyes briefly.

“I think I will go for that ale.”

“A great idea”, Javier agreed, and sat down at the table.

The next day, Takeshi and Yuma arrived. They only stopped briefly to greet them, before they rode on to the village, in a hurry to relay the Queen’s message. Hasty preparations began and on the very same day at dusk, a large crowd made its way out of the village - people, cattle, dogs, and carts, starting on the long dangerous road back to the citadel. Javier spotted Nanami-sensei riding in one of the carts. She nodded at them, and smiled tightly. Javier bowed to her, as the cart passed.

Yuzuru spoke quietly to one of the Yatagarasu, asking them to accompany the people and warn them of any danger that his far-seeing eyes might glimpse before they did. The wise bird understood the plea, and croaked in agreement, then flew off to join the crowd of people, who greeted him with cries of joy like a divine omen.

“Are you going to separate the couple?” Javier asked, surprised.

Yuzuru looked at him:

“They will see each other again. I am sorry to do it, but I can’t let my people on the road without such aid. And I have to keep one with us because we can’t do without their wisdom either, where we’re going.”

Javier nodded. He trusted Yuzuru’s judgement.

“Thank you again for your help”, he spoke to the remaining Yatagarasu. “We will take good care of you on the journey, so you can meet again with your loved one.”

Patrick was watching the motley crowd leave the fields, an inscrutable look on his face.

“Such a big gathering on the road will draw attention”, he mused. “Is this a good strategy?”

“The Queen believes so”, Yuzuru answered, shortly.

“The Wyrdexins may not attack them on the way but instead shrewdly follow to see where they go”, Patrick went on, dawning realization on his face. He turned to Yuzuru: “You are putting the citadel in danger. How is this any different than Keiji wanting to spill blood inside its walls?”

“Giving away the location of the citadel after years of protecting was was not an easy choice for the Queen”, Yuzuru answered calmly. “Yet it was done with the blessing of all the inhabitants. It was not a selfish destructive act, but a carefully planned strategy. The Queen decided to lure as many Wyrdexins as possible to the citadel, where she and her people will make a last stand. In this way, we may hope to find the Wyrdexins’ nests without being swarmed before we reach them.”

Patrick drew in a breath.

“Is it worth the risk?” he wondered, as if to himself. “For us or for them? It’s not how I’d do it.”

Neither Yuzuru nor Javier answered. But Patrick was growing more and more anxious.

“The goddess…. She will wake”, Patrick whispered shrilly, grasping Yuzuru’s wrist. “Do you know what this means?”

“She may wake, or she may not”, Yuzuru said, with the same quiet calm, as he gently but firmly extracted his arm from Patrick’s hold. “The Queen has placed no faith in the awakening of the goddess, only in the fight that’s left in her people.”

Patrick snorted loudly, rolled his eyes, and went back inside the house.

Javier and Yuzuru, and the remaining Yatagarasu stayed to watch the crowd of people and animals as they walked away, the clamour of their passing gradually fading into the distance.

Then at last, they turned to go back inside, and their eyes met. Yuzuru’s eyes were glistening. Javier drew him in a close embrace, cradling his head and whispering soothing nonsense. Yuzuru’s eyes closed tightly, blinking back tears, as he clung to Javier.

“For better or for worse”, Yuzuru whispered into Javier’s shoulder, “The wheels have now been set in motion.”

When they went back inside, Patrick was sitting at the table, a mug of ale in front of him, staring ahead unseeingly. He was patting the head of his big dog.

“Stay sober, Patrick”, Yuzuru told him. “We leave at dawn, in secrecy.”

“In secrecy? We’ll have an entire menagerie behind us. Can Kuro come too?” Patrick asked. “I’m not leaving him behind to die alone and unfed.”

“Of course”, Yuzuru answered.

Patrick nodded.

“How do you feel about walking into a dragon’s den in your old age, mate?” he told the dog affectionately, rubbing his floppy ears.

Despite his own warning, Yuzuru sat down at the table, and asked:

“Do you have any more of that ale?”

Patrick left the table and then returned with a large barrel which he placed on the table. Two more mugs were placed in front of Javier and Yuzuru.

“Drink up. If we’re lucky enough to return, we’ll drink better stuff.”

They drank for a while in heavy silence, each lost in their own thoughts.

At last, Javier cleared his throat, glanced briefly at Yuzuru, and then addressed Patrick:

“I think it’s time you told us what you know… don’t you think?”

Patrick raised his eyebrows.

“Meaning… we won’t get a better chance, eh?”

“Indeed, we may not”, Javier replied, seriously. “And in any case, no better time than the present. I think the time for secrets has long passed”, he went on, looking at Yuzuru, as if inviting him to agree.

Yuzuru nodded at Javier, then sipped quietly at his drink, watching Patrick.

“What makes you think I know anything?” Patrick smiled, appearing to enjoy the brief surge of power he experienced in those moments, as Yuzuru and Javier seemed to be hanging on his every word.

“Don't play the fool!” Javier raised his voice. “You've been giving us all sorts of cryptic hints. You told Satoko that you know things about Yuzuru that no one else does.”

“Did I now?” Patrick murmured. “No one else.... but surely, the goddess did not bless me with more insight than others? No, only with brains, which it seems the most of you lack...”

“Can you not speak in riddles for once?” Yuzuru spoke up, suddenly, and they both looked at him. “Tell us plainly what you know.”

Patrick shrugged, as if it mattered little to him.

“Alright. What I know is no more than what I reasoned. If you are willing to listen, I'll gladly tell you, especially since the citadel will soon be in danger, and you have little time.”

Yuzuru brought a hand to his forehead, as if suddenly dizzy. He pushed the mug of ale firmly aside.

“Tell me”, he repeated fiercely.

Javier was looking at him worriedly, then he turned to look at Patrick, as the latter finally started to speak:

“When your mother became pregnant, Yuzuru, she said it was the hand of fate. Everyone wondered at that time. We knew the Queen took all the remedies against being with child. No one wanted to be with child back then. So it was strange. Later, after you were rescued, Daisuke told me she heard your mother crying over Shuzo's tomb. She was saying something like 'I thought this child would be our salvation, but he turned out to be your doom. The goddess has tricked me, she has forsaken us.'..”

Yuzuru shuddered. Javier abandoned his place at the table and went to sit beside Yuzuru. He wrapped an arm around his waist.

“Your mother was ill with grief. Don’t dwell on her words”, he whispered to Yuzuru.

“Yes, but don’t you see?” Patrick interrupted, impatiently. “Why would she think you would be our salvation? Why would she think the goddess has tricked her?”

Yuzuru was quiet and pale, looking at Patrick with wide eyes. Javier stared at Patrick pointedly, but Patrick ignored him.

“It was all very mysterious, I thought. Your birth was out of the ordinary to begin with, as was your unlikely rescue, and then these words made your existence even more strange. And then, along the years, as I kept thinking about it, in the stark light of reason, without undue hope or superstition, it all became clear to me. And nothing that has occurred since then has ever proven me wrong – in fact, it all served as further evidence that I was right.”

“Get to the point”, Javier hissed. He drew Yuzuru tighter against him, his fingers clenching on his waist possessively.

“Your mother prayed to the goddess to wake. Of course, so did a lot of people, but she was the Queen. Eventually her prayers must have got through. But still the goddess could not wake, even if her dream was no longer one of prosperity, but a nightmare – a nightmare we all lived in. Still, the goddess heard your mother while trapped in a dream, and she reached out to your mother while in her dream. The goddess dreamt you up as a shield against the nightmare she could not awaken to ward off herself. She understood the pleas for help were earnest and the need was dire – how could she not? The irony was that we had probably never been in such danger – not of dying in battle, or being enslaved, but of dying out as a people. And yet the goddess could not wake because the citadel was still safe and standing.”

“Yes, we know”, Javier said on a bored tone. “We have heard all that from Keiji. You are also one of those extremists who think the goddess must be awakened at all costs. Well, I hope you’re happy now, the citadel will soon be in such danger that she will probably wake.”

Patrick continued to ignore him.

“The only mystery to me, is - does Shizuka know?... has she understood? Sometimes I think she must know, but at other times, I think she is just as silly and misguided as everyone else…. or blinded by her love for her only child.”

“… Understood what?” Yuzuru asked, faintly. “Patrick, you can call me an idiot, but I’m not sure that I understand what you are trying to say.”

“Don’t worry, Yuzuru, neither do I”, Javier reassured him. “Patrick was a long time at the ale, so maybe that’s why…”

“You’re both idiots”, Patrick interrupted, but without any ire. “Yuzuru – your existence is an answer to Shizuka’s calls for help – woven into the dream that could not end. You are a part of the dream of the goddess. She dreamt you up as a banner of hope and a shield for the people, instead of the help she could not provide herself. And yes, she had also dreamt the Wyrdexins before. This nightmare is all of her doing. And your unlikely birth and survival is also her doing. Because she has purposefully woven you into the dream. Do you understand now?”

“This is just a theory”, Javier said, skeptically. “I don’t see how you can prove any of it. Everyone is full of theories about how the Wyrdexins came to be, and no wonder – they’re your greatest enemies.”

Patrick gave him a withering stare.

“I don’t see how you can disprove it either. Everything I said makes sense.”

“It is easy to blame divinity for everything wrong that happens”, Javier replied. “If it doesn’t rain, it’s the fault of the gods. You are attacked by fierce enemies that you can’t fight off – oh then I guess the goddess must be having a nightmare.”

“You know nothing of our ways, stranger”, Patrick replied, irritated by Javier making light of his theory. “The goddess weaves a dream of peace and prosperity for us. If there is danger from outside that threatens our city, she awakens to defend it, and the peace and prosperity vanishes because her mind is bent on war and destruction. This is ancient law. It’s how it’s always been. But never in the ancient scrolls are there any records of our people being brought to the brink of destruction as they have been in the recent years – while the goddess still sleeps soundly. Never”, Patrick repeated fiercely.

“I think Patrick is right.”

Javier looked at Yuzuru, stricken.

“I think I understood”, Yuzuru went on, choosing his words carefully. “If I’m a part of the goddess’s dream - then when her dream ends, when she wakes up, I will also disappear.”

“What?” Javier almost shouted. “Listen to me, Yuzuru. You are not a dream or a figment of anyone’s imagination! You’re a normal, sweet, brave boy living in a big dangerous world, and trying to get by – like all of us do. And I love you for it – and I wish that we – you and me, could be side by side forever so we could get by in this world, together, from now on. Even if it is only short road to the end for us, I want to walk it together with you. You and me - right?”

Yuzuru smiled at Javier. His fingers played absently with the swan brooch on its chain, tracing it thoughtfully. His reply came late, and it seemed to Javier that he was talking to himself:

“Turns out that I was right”, he smiled, sadly. “All my life I had the notion that my existence, my fate, was tied to theirs… It was true. If the Wyrdexins did not exist, then neither would I.”

“No”, Javier shook his head firmly. “No, Yuzuru, no.”

Partick looked from one to the other in silence. He had spoken his piece, and it seemed as if for once, he had nothing more to say. At last he shrugged.

“Whatever will be, is already written in the book of fate,” he declared.

When they went to sleep, Javier crawled into Yuzuru’s cot, underneath his blankets, without caring if Patrick saw or heard them.

“Listen, Yuzu”, Javier said in a low voice, “I don’t believe a word Patrick is saying – not a word. He’s crazy.”

Yuzuru’s shoulders lifted minutely.

Javier pulled him tightly against him.

“Yuzu – please.”

“Javi, I know you don’t want to believe it”, Yuzuru whispered back to him. “But it doesn’t matter anyway, does it? Our road ahead is short, like you said. I am grateful I could live so long, and that I met you. But my heart breaks for you – your fate is cruel, Javi. I’m sorry. I wish I could make it better. That’s all I wish.”

Javier’s fingers dug deep into his flesh.

“Don’t leave me then. Don’t ever leave me, Yuzu.”

Yuzuru turned and buried his face in Javier’s chest.

“Never as long as I live”, he vowed. “We are always together.”

Later when Javier fell asleep, Yuzuru remained awake for a long time afterwards, simply listening to Javier’s peaceful breathing as he slept, arms still tight around him.

At dawn, Javier, Yuzuru and Patrick rode out, on horses, the train of beasts behind them. In their bags, they each carried, aside from supplies, all the tools necessary to light a quick fire, and tar. Towards evening, the Yatagarasu started circling above their heads with shrill cries of alarm. They hid themselves hastily, drawing their weapons in case a fight was inevitable. A gathering of Wyrdexins approached, with horrible speed in the fading light. They were staying close together, and appeared as the body of a one immense beast, with a single course and purpose. They seemed to take no notice of them, or did not care to tackle them. They ran like the wind, not towards the fields, but in the direction of the citadel.

“The lure is working”, Yuzuru murmured, as they emerged from their hideout, watching as the Wyrdexins disappeared from their eyes in a cloud of dust. “I hope everyone stays safe.”

Twice more in the night, they awoke to the unsettling noise of Wyrdexins clattering their way past them, rushing towards a set destination they seemingly did not want to divert from. If they took notice of them, they did not stop to attack, and merely swooped past them into the darkness. Yuzuru, Javier and Patrick had to calm the frightened, aggressive beasts, in which the Wyrdexins’ arrival seem to awaken a primitive hatred. They were ready to charge them then and there, but the time for an altercation had not yet come.

With the help of the magical creatures, it was easy to find the Wyrdexins’s nests. On the third day of their journey, they found themselves at the far end of the forest, looking over strange, interconnected mounds raised from the ground level. There could be little doubt that what they were seeing were the nests of the feared Wyrdexins.

Patrick lifted his hand and pointed.

“Look! It’s like we guessed all along”, he said, excitedly. “Burrows in the ground.”

“Yes”, Yuzuru murmured. “Dark, intricate tunnels. They build them like moles. Difficult to reach, impossible to siege. At least from the outside.”

Patrick nodded.

“So what to do?”

Javier grinned at him.

“Easy. Siege them from the inside.”

“Hey, hey hey. I think it’s high time you two let me in on this strategy we’re supposed to have. I’ve gone along with you so far, but it seems to me that we’re flying blind here.”

“Not at all”, Javier answered. “It’s actually very simple. We sneak into their nests. Our beasts will clamour right outside, engaging the Wyrdexins to fight. If any try to leave, our creatures will surround them and trap them, not allowing any to escape. Every stray Wyrdexin will be pushed back into the nest. Hopefully this distraction will keep many of them busy, of those which did not yet leave to storm the citadel, thus allowing us to make our way deeper inside.”

“Right…”, Patrick said, impatiently. “And then?”

“Then comes the difficult part”, Yuzuru answered, “we have to destroy them from the inside, from the deepest corners of their intricate tunnels, to make sure there is no way they can burrow deeper and escape. For this purpose, we must reach the very ends of the tunnels, and we must be swift – The Yatagarasu will guide us in this – he will fly ahead, and warn us of any danger in front of us in the tunnels. Once we reach the ends of the tunnels, we will seal them with tar, and then set fire as we run all the way back to the entrance.”

“Wait a moment”, Patrick raised a hand. “Let us assume we somehow manage to accomplish this insane venture. Even if we succeed, and we seal and set fire in all corners, upon our return to the entrance of the nest, we will find ourselves trapped between fire and the Wyrdexins. They will be rabid, pushed back by the animals from the outside, and with the danger of fire right behind them. They will rip us to shreds. I’ll be the first one to go, with my lame leg.”

“...Yes”, Yuzuru answered, “most likely. But we cannot achieve this unless we trap ourselves inside with them.”

“Do you realize now why this was a hopeless mission from the start?” Javier asked Patrick, grimly.

Patrick sighed.

“A grim death you have chosen for me. And for yourselves.”

“Let’s not waste any more time”, Yuzuru said.

They dismounted and said farewell to their horses.

“No, Hope, no”, Yuzuru said, gently but firmly, pushing the horse back. “I know you are not afraid and would come with me, but not this time. I command you: Stay behind, or go back home. Be safe. Farewell.”

“Farewell, Haru”, Javier said, pressing his forehead to the horse’s muzzle briefly. “You’ve been a very good girl, you’ve helped me a lot. Take care of yourself, and be well.”

Javier and Yuzuru did not look at Patrick as he said goodbye to his dog and horse, knowing he would hate it if they witnessed him being emotional. Their eyes misty, they shared a look, and nodded. Then, carefully, they began making their way inside the gaping mouth of the largest mound – clearly the entrance to the nests. Soon Patrick joined them, grim and quiet. Their beasts followed close behind. Soon they found themselves in a large structure, out of which a myriad of tunnels were dug.

Here the beasts would stay behind, and the three of them would begin their mission.

“Here we are”, Yuzuru whispered. “We know what to do, yes? Be as swift as you can. We have a lot of ground to cover.”

They each chose a tunnel, and waded through. Yuzuru whispered to the Yatagarasu, and he set off immediately, flying ahead of Javier in his chosen tunnel.

It was fortunate that the galleries dug underneath the ground by the Wyrdexins were so narrow that only one or two at the time could crawl out of the dark, damp spaces. Several times, The Yatagarasu flew back to Javier emitting shril cries of alarm. Javier clutched his weapons and charged them, dispatching them quickly by aiming furiously at their bulbous eyes, before they could even think of attacking or retreating into their shells. In their nests they were more placid, slow to react, not expecting any danger that might reach them here. Soon Javier reached the end of the narrow gallery, sealed it with tar, and set fire. Then he rushed back, leaving the flames to wreck havoc in his wake.

There was no one in the main hallway, except a few Wyrdexins, easily slayed by the beasts that lay in wait, blocking their main exit. He waited anxiously until he finally saw Yuzuru emerge running from a tunnel, his face set, and his weapons stained with blood. Javier brightened and cheered.

“All right!” Yuzuru called back at him encouragingly. “Good job, Javi! Brace yourself! Many more to go!”

He made to set off towards the next tunnel, but Javier stopped him.

“Take him with you!” he pointed to the Yatagarasu. “He will warn you of the danger ahead of you.”

“No, Javi, I told him to stay with you. Don’t worry about me!” Yuzuru chanted, and he ran off before Javier could stop him.

Patrick emerged from his own tunnel, groaning, and clutching his leg. Grumbling, he picked another tunnel, while Javier similarly wasted no time in flying down another path. He figured that if he went through them faster, the other two would have less work. Patrick did not look like he would last for long, and as for Yuzuru, Javier would feel easier knowing he had the three-legged crow to warn him of danger. But the Yatagarasu remained with him, no matter how Javier begged him to fly off to Yuzuru instead.

The Wyrdexins were beginning to be alarmed by the fire, emerging from tunnels, putting up a strong fight. They were no longer so easy to dispatch, as they rallied fiercely against the intruders.

After a while, they could no longer see Patrick. He was either wounded or dead in one of the tunnels. Javier rushed into the tunnel where he last saw Patrick enter, so he could finish sealing it and setting fire to it. However, his path was soon blocked by a large Wyrdexin devouring whatever was left of Patrick. For a moment, Javier was stunned in place in pure terror, as he was when he first encountered these nightmarish beasts. He could feel his weapon slide from his weak hand, as his gaze remained fixed on the scene in front of him. He would have been easy prey in those moments, except the Yatagarasu rushed towards the Wyrdexin with a deafening cry and clawed one of his eyes out. The Wyrdexin shrieked, making a grab for the three-legged crow, but the Yatagarasu nimbly evaded him, and pecked violently at its other eye, leaving the eye socket empty and bleeding. The Wyrdexin fell in agony to the ground, while Javier, grateful for the reprieve, finally pulled himself together to deal the creature the finishing blows. As he rushed out of that tunnel, Javier still felt the chill of sweat, and he trembled as if he was freezing, even with the fire at his back.

It was now left to Yuzuru and Javier to cover the remaining pathways, and deal with increasingly more incensed enemies. The fire was also steadily spreading, threatening to engulf the hallway as well. The walls of the mound, though sturdily built, were now in great danger of collapsing due to the growing heat. Their animals were steadily retreating towards the exit, but still fiercely fighting any Wyrdexin that tried to claw its way out.

Javier saw Yuzuru emerge out of a tunnel, at a run, his hair in disarray, and his face dirty with soot. He followed him with his eyes, as he made to enter another. Abruptly, Yuzuru spotted Javier and, despite the danger, he made a face at him, then grinned brightly. Despite his exhaustion and unease, Javier couldn’t help grinning back at him, relieved to see him whole and in good spirits. But then just as suddenly, something changed in Yuzuru’s expression. He passed a hand in front of his eyes, as if he could suddenly no longer see in front of him. Javier watched with trepidation, as Yuzuru turned slowly, his eyes entirely unfocused and blank.

“Javi!!” Yuzuru screamed, a scream of pure terror like Javier had never heard from him before, regardless of the danger.

Then he dropped to the ground, as if felled. For a few moments, he looked ghostly pale under the soot, his eyes rolling back in his head.

Javier was next to him in the next second. Terrified, he knelt next to him, and hoisted Yuzuru’s body half in his lap, running his hands over him, in a panic, not knowing what was wrong or how to help.

“I’m here, Yuzu, I’m here… Yuzuru, what is it? What’s wrong?”

“I’m – I’m dying. No… no – I’m fading. It’s cold…. It’s cold, stone cold”, Yuzuru was repeating, despite the fact that the entire enclosure was sweltering, threatening to engulf them in flames. “Javi – hold me, I’m scared – Javi!”

Javier held him tightly, as tightly as if he wanted to make them into a single being, never to be apart again.

And yet, soon he was only holding on to smoke. Yuzuru faded from his sight, and from his arms, even as he kept repeating Javier’s name.

In the citadel, the battle was fierce. Screams were echoing everywhere – battle cries, warnings, pleas, dying groans. When faced with the grim reality, some people felt their courage leave them, and they surrendered to despair, running amok, tearing their hair out, screaming in terror: “The Wyrdexins broke in! The citadel is under siege!” Others paid them no mind, devising cunning methods to lay traps and kill Wyrdexins that would venture into unfamiliar territory.

But the situation was dire. The Wyrdexins had nearly broken through the last enclosure, and then they would be free to roam the innermost circle of the well-defended city. Blood was pouring all over the streets that were once kept spotless. Everyone – even children, were outside, fighting – but the Wyrdexins were many and ruthless, and appeared as if they would gain the upper hand.

Then, suddenly a new scream broke out:

“The goddess has awakened!”

People froze in wonder, then repeated the cry, in joy, or in terror. Some of them took cover, more frightened by the goddess than they were by their enemies.

The goddess rose up from her slab, with an ear-shattering clamour, shaking off the offerings still laid on her chest, shattering to pieces the stone that weighed her down. Grasping her sword, she gazed around looking for targets.

Every step she took was thunder, as she left the quiet little graveyard. Her shadow loomed over the battlements, and the people stopped and cheered her on. Even as they knew that hard times of famine and deprivation were ahead, for every time the goddess awakened the land would be laid bare and waste with the destruction, the earlier bounty she had dreamed for them fading with her awakening – in that moment, it could not compare to the joy of seeing their enemies crushed.

But before the goddess could even lift one of her stone fingers against the Wyrdexins, one by one the frightful creatures began to fade before the bewildered eyes of the people. The Wyrdexins stopped in their tracks as if stunned, but while the people, emboldened, rushed to give them the killing blows, they disappeared completely, as if dissolving into the dusk. The people rubbed at their eyes, wondering at this new magic. It seemed to be a trick of the light – one moment they were right in front of them, and in the next moment they were gone without a trace.

The goddess roamed the streets, uttering fearsome battle cries, seeking for enemies to destroy. But the enemies had entirely vanished – defeated it seems, before there could even be a battle. Still the goddess raged, destroying all in her path, her berserk spirit awakened after a heavy and troubled sleep.

Shizuka slid against the wall of the citadel slowly, spear falling from her hand and clattering to the ground, cowered by her sudden realization – they were right, those who claimed the goddess was trapped in a nightmare. Now everything about that nightmare has vanished – the enemies, but maybe also the sign sent by the goddess as an answer to Shizuka’s pleas to vanquish those enemies – her own child, Yuzuru. Shizuka had been wrong in her reasoning, but not wrong in her instincts. And still, as she thought about it more, it was clear to her that it all worked out for the best. She had a certainty that she could not explain, that she would see Yuzuru again – maybe not soon, but the separation that comes with death was not upon them yet. Blinking slowly with what might have been tears of relief, she gazed upon the citadel she had defended, bracing herself for what came next. The people had been ready to die under her command, but now an even harder task awaited them – survival.

“Come on!” Javier yelled through his tears. “Come on, you big ugly thing! Tear me to bits! What are you waiting for?!”

But the Wyrdexin in front of him stopped as if uncertain, then shuddered from head to toe. Before Javier’s eyes, the image of it faded slowly, just like Yuzuru’s had done, and then disappeared completely. Javier looked around. The remaining Wyrdexins had disappeared as well, and only the fire surrounded him. Trembling with exhaustion and pain, Javier lay down, unmindful of the flames. The Yatagarasu circled him, screaming shrilly, but Javier closed his eyes, in defeat. There was nothing left to fight – either for, or with. He had little strength and no will to crawl outside of the mound, even as the heat became unbearable. The fumes soon began to choke him, and he started coughing.

As if in a dream, Javier felt himself being dragged, his body slowly getting bruised against the rough earth and stones it was brushing against. Someone was huffing and puffing, and stubbornly dragging him out, not caring of his completely unwilling, helpless state. Javier cracked an eye open, curious despite himself. It was Haru that was so stubborn in dragging Javier’s dead weight along. Only when she was outside, on the grass, some distance away from the burning mound, did she let go of him. Javier dropped down, still coughing, his soot-filled lungs straining for oxygen, as he struggled to inhale the fresh air. The Yatagarasu had ceased his shrill crowing and was now crooning quietly beside him. Javier lay back in the grass and soon lost consciousness.

Five days later

“All the Wyrdexins have disappeared. There is no trace of them. The fire has been put out and we looked everywhere.” Riku cast his eyes down, as he went on, more soberly: “I am sorry. There is no sign of Y- of our prince. No remains, nothing. Oh, we did find something though” – Riku reached into his pocket and retrieved a trinket – it was the silver chain with the swan brooch.

Shizuka took it, with a nod, looked at it, then passed it to Javier quietly.

Javier reached for it, his vision clouding over. He grasped the brooch tightly in his palm – despite the fire it had escaped, despite the warm chest it lay against for so long, it was cold, and untouched, like no one had ever worn it. The brooch was now back with Javier. With savage motions, Javier ripped the chain and slid the brooch back into his shirt pocket, close to his chest.

Then he stumbled away. He felt like a dead man walking. Slowly, he looked around him as he walked, at the people still rejoicing their victory, at the sun shining as if in mockery of his despair, and he felt like what he was – a stranger in this land, truly alone and remote from their joy.

“Javier!” Shizuka called after him.

Javier turned, listlessly. Upon seeing Shizuka’s delicate features, reminding him so much of Yuzuru, he lost his composure entirely, and broke into tears.

“Please tell me”, he begged, uncaring of any people that might pause to stare at him. “How can I go on? What can I do?…” Then, as if struck by a sudden thought, he grasped at Shizuka’s sleeve and spoke urgently: “Shizuka! The goddess dreamt him once, she can just dream him up again. Shizuka, please! Tell me there’s hope.”

Shizuka smiled, unbothered by Javier’s familiarity, even as Riku cringed and looked away.

“There is hope, Javier”, she answered, soothingly. “Yuzuru is now a remnant of the goddess’s last dream. The goddess is back again to her peaceful sleep under the stone. Our people are battered, wounded and famished, but most of them will recover. Yilia will flourish again, free of danger for a while. But where life is, danger will ever lurk. There is no darkness without dawn, people say. But the opposite is also true - every new dawn heralds a coming darkness. And when danger arises again, a hero is needed, and Yuzuru will be rewoven into the dream.”

“But I need him now”, Javier howled, disregarding all propriety. Still grabbing Shizuka’s sleeve, he clenched it in his fist as he cried, until he had no more tears left.

“I know, Javier. I know. Find some comfort in this – you and Yuzuru survived, against all odds. You went to your death, but did not surrender to it. And neither did Yuzuru. He is not gone, Javier, he did not leave you. In a way, he is also a hero who sleeps.”

“Small comfort is that to me”, Javier sniffed, “if I can’t see him or touch him.”

Shizuka caressed his head gently.

“You will. I am certain of this, and I have learned to trust my feelings. The two of you will walk again together – in peril, and in peace.”

Javier nodded at her, then he set forth towards the citadel. There was no great peril on the road anymore, so he walked alone, uncaring of when he stopped to rest, or what he ate, minding little if he could find no nourishment and remained hungry. He made the journey on foot in twelve days.

Javier only stopped briefly on the shore of the river where he and Yuzuru took the binding oath. Clutching the swan-shaped brooch tightly in his fist, he wanted to throw it in the river, but decided against the madness of such an act in the last possible moment. Instead, clutching it tighter, Javier entered the citadel, and walked towards the graveyard. The people stared at him as he passed, unseeing and remote, as if he was a ghost. Some bowed to him in respect and in fear, as they looked into his sunken face and red-rimmed eyes and imagined that he must have seen unimaginable terrors in battle. Javier went straight to the Tomb of the Goddess. The stone slab was whole and without a single crack, as if it had never been broken into pieces. The goddess slept, her sword on her chest, heaps of flowers scattered on top of her slab. Javier lifted a hand and resolutely brushed down the flowers. Instead of them he firmly set down the swan brooch.

“I will not beg you”, Javier said, voice raspy from disuse. “I will tell you. Let this weight be heavy on you until you remember the one who wore it for me. Bring him back to me, or I swear I will rain such misfortune on your city that you will have no choice but to awaken and fight me-”, Javier’s voice broke, his vague threats turning to dust, as he realized that his words were empty – the goddess will surely not hear him, or heed him. He was not even an Yilian. “Yuzuru”, Javier whispered instead. “Yuzuru. I know you’re not entirely gone. How could you be gone while I am still here? The part of me that was in you still exists, even if the part of you that is in me feels dead. Just remember that you promised not to leave me. I’m keeping the swan brooch safe for you until we meet again. But know that if you linger too long, you might find me gone. I can’t live long without half my heart and soul, an unfinished man.”

Javier finally stood up heavily, and without retrieving the swan brooch from the stone slab of the tomb of the goddess, he left the quiet graveyard.

*

Two years later

A sunny day dawned in the citadel of Yilia.

The gates of the citadel were wide open, and people roamed freely. The once-austere steps were now the hub of bustling activity. Children screamed and chase deach other among the trees and flowers, now adorning what was once a city made of stone.

Javier slept against the battlements in the courtyard, as he often did during summer, despite the fact that he had a big, well-furnished room in the palace. Being shut in made him restless and unable to breathe. When a ray of the sun tickled him, he opened an eye briefly, and groaned, turning on his other side. And then, something fell into his lap. Javier squinted, then his eyes widened.

It was the swan brooch.

Javier turned slowly, and his lips, that have almost forgotten how to smile, broke into a wide grin. The only reason why he did not tackle Yuzuru down right away, was because he could not stop looking his fill.

Yuzuru looked beautiful, even more beautiful than Javier’s feverish memories of him.

When Javier finally reached out for him, Yuzuru stopped him with a hand on his chest, and recited to him, solemnly, in the Yilian language:

“I know not what life is, nor death. Year in year out – all but a dream. Both heaven and hell are left behind. I stand in the moonlit dawn – free.”

Not understanding the words, Javier merely gazed at Yuzuru, half hopeful, half fearful. But then, Yuzuru smiled at him widely, and clutched at his shirt to pull him up:

“Let’s go, Javi. Out into the world.”

THE END