Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

To an outsider, Rose and Rung's friendship was something that was very mutual and the two were close. 

Bots could assume that they were dating, which was not the case at all. The two were just really good friends. 

It was common knowledge that Rose was the patient of Rung, and after he dismissed Rose the two became very close. 

But, some crewmembers got the wrong idea and believed that they were a thing. I mean, who would blame them? 

The Liaison's schedule revolved around helping fellow crewmates out, and zey always visited Rung's Office first. 

Zey always talked to him first and then left. 

It didn't stop anyone from trying to drop hints by little things Rung or Rose would do. 

"He's totally into you!" or "Zey really likes you!" were common comments of any member of The Lost Light. 

Especially Swerve. 

Swerve and Whirl often plan and tease Rose about zir crush on Rung, Rose ignores it knowing that they would forget about zir in a minute. 

Which is usually the case. But lately doubt has begun to cast upon zir's true feelings for Rung. 

Zey did come to terms with zir mutual respect for Rung, but all the teasing that the both of them were going through really got to zir. 

Was zey... 

In love with Rung?

In theory, it was good on paper.  But in reality, it was nothing short of ridiculous. Rose did find the mech attractive, but could never see them together.

So what's with the crew trying to get them together? Rose and Rung were just friends. 

Just friends… 

Rose wasn’t sure if that statement was true or not, and zey wasn't going to find out. Rose walked to Rung’s Office first thing in the morning. Rose walked up to the door of Rung’s Office, and knocked on it. 

“Come in!” Rung calls, Rose opened the door. Rung swerved his chair around to see Rose and smiled. 

“Ah, hello Rose! Come sit down!” Rung offered. Rose nodded and sat down across from him. 

“Rung, I got some of your energon pocky treats, I know you were running out of them so I made time in my rather busy schedule to make time and help.” Rose said, reaching down from zir satchel and pulling out the box of energon pocky’s. 

Rung’s optics brightened. “I appreciate it. Thank you Rose.” Rung said. 

“No problem, you know I value our relationship and I wanted to do something nice for once.” Rose said. Rung nodded. 

“I really appreciate your companionship Rose.” Rung said. Rose smiled. 

“No need for flattery. I just am glad you’re my friend. I really appreciate it.” Rose said, Rung smiled. 

“I understand.”  He said, taking the pocky out of the box and holding one out for Rose. 

“Would you like some?” Rung asked. 

“No thank you.” Rose said politely.

“Alright.” Rung said. 

“Rung, do you want to come with me to run an errand?”  Rose asked. 

“Of course.” Rung said. “I do have a bit of time before my next session, so why not?” Rung asked. Rose smiled and walked with Rung. The two talked for a while. The two of them walked inside the empty room. 

“Rung, um…” Rose started. 

“Yes?” Rung answers. 

“Um, do you hear what the others are saying about us?” Asked Rose. 

“Oh, of course. But, I don’t really mind what they say, if I allow them to let us know that it’s bothering me then they would more than likely continue, so if you ignore them, then they would get bored. I should know, I deal with Whirl everyday.” Rung said, Rose nodded. 

“What if… Those comments made you feel something else? Like… Something else? Like you feel something that you didn’t know you felt?” inquires Rose. 

Rung looked puzzled and thought about it. He never really thought of the possibility of this at all. Rung nodded, and smiled. “Well, maybe it’s something there you just didn’t feel before. Maybe it unlocked something you didn’t think you felt beforehand… A desire, a burning passion or maybe lust is that something.” Rung explained. 

“Either way, I will listen for as long as you want.”  Rung reassured Rose and smiled gently at zir. 

“Thanks Rung, you really helped me… I understand, hopefully my feelings will smooth over soon.” Rose replies, Rung nodded. 

“Glad to be of help, I have to get going. Do you want to walk back with me?” Rung offers. 

“Of course.” Rose smiled. 

The two got up and were prepared to walk out of the empty room, only for the room to be locked from the inside. Rose attempted to place the unlock code but it wasn’t unlocking, Rose didn’t give up, zey went and tried to open the door once again. 

But it wouldn’t budge, Rose sighed, and sat down. “It’s hopeless, Rung… It won’t open!” Rose slumped down from the realization. 

Rung was busy thinking, he then turned back to face Rose. “Well, it’s okay, surely someone could at LEAST know we’re missing.” Rung tries to reassure the cybertronian. “Or atleast come and find us.” Rung said. 

“... Find us? Oh stars, what if we’re here forever?” Rose asked. 

Rung looked down. “I wouldn’t think like that Rose. Think more on the bright side. Maybe I could call someone.” Rung said. “Hopefully that’ll speed up the process.” Rung added. 

Rose nods. “You do that, I’ll go check on the doors. And see if I could somehow override the doors functions in my favor.” Rose explains the plan to Rung. Rung nodded and began to go on his comms. 

Rose walked to the doors once more and attempted to at least pry open the doors. But there was nothing zey could see, ze didn’t know what to do. Defeated, Zey walked back to Rung. “I couldn’t find a way to open the doors.” said Rose. 

“Oh… I couldn’t reach anyone on my comms.” Rung said, he looked quite embarrassed and looked away. 

“So, there might not be a way out?” Rose asked Rung, panic starting to settle in. 

"Rose.” Rung placed a servo on Rose’s shoulder. Rose looked up into Rung’s blue optics and zey could’ve sworn zey saw his optics shine. Rose’s blush deepened. Zey cleared zir throat in an attempt to try and get rid of the burning silence. 

But Rung chuckled– albeit in a nervous way, and looked at Rose. “Relax Rose, everything should be fine, I predict we might get help sooner or later.” Rung reassured Rose. 

At this point, Rose couldn’t stand it. And slammed zir dermas on a shocked Rung, who kissed back. The two kissed each other, Rose blushed brightly. Rung in shock, didn’t know how to react.  Rung immediately went in for a kiss, the two deepened the kiss and it changed into a heated makeout. 
Rung embraced zir and moved down to zir panel, and rubbed it, hoping it would open for him. In turn, Rose opened zir panel. Rung blushed and looked down at the valve entrance that was exposed. 

Why did this escalate to this? He looked back to Rose, who was half covered up and had a lust look in zir optics. Rung felt their digits intertwine with one another and the makeout lasted for a good while. When it was decided Rung was done, he pulled away, a string of silvia attached to both of their lips together. 

He looked down to realize Rose’s  panel was already opened, and began to smile. “W-Well, Isn’t this… Um… Wonderful?” 

To say that Rung and Rose were embarrassed was an understatement. Both of them barely even established these feelings beforehand so it was in the heat of the moment. Rung knew feelings like these weren’t too odd and too far in between at all. But it still really made him feel awkward. 

Rung leaned down and kissed Rose some more, sliding his servo down zir’s valve and started to slowly add in a digit and began to pump Roses’ valve. Rung felt the slick warmth of Rose’s heat. 

Rung didn’t know what truly happened next, all he knew was that his frame went on autopilot. He knew all the places where Rose would enjoy. Speaking of Rose, ze were enjoying this. 

Rung placed his spike inside of Rose’s valve. “R-Rose, u-um…” Rung starts. 

“Yes Rung?” Rose responded. 

“P-Please tell me if I’m hurting you…” Rung said, feeling embarrassed. 

“Of course.”

Rung slowly slid inside of Rose, their digits still entwined together. Rung slides into Rose’s Valve gently and tried to be gentle, Rung didn’t have much of a sexual appitite. But he was willing to try and please Rose. 

Rung slowly maneuvered around Rose’s valve. Rung continued to move around Rose’s valve. Their digits are still entwined together. Rose gave soft kisses to Roses’ helm. While he rode inside of Rose’s tight valve. 

Rung continued, zir valve was being milked by Rung’s spike, Rung moaned, and Rose did as well. The two occasionally kissed once again. Rung moans loudly, and continues to rut inside of Rose. 

Rung bit his lip, and gasped. He went a bit faster, and leaned into kiss Rose on the lips, eventually he overloaded into Rose. Rung pulled out of Rose and looked away from zir. 

He had nothing to say to zir. The both of them placed their panels on, as the door opened. 

“There you were Rung and Rose! Are the both of you okay?” Said a voice, they turned to face the voice. 

It was Rodimus, Rose looked down. 

“How did you find us?” Rung asked. 

“Well, these troublemakers told us where you were.” Ultra Magnus said, referring to Whirl and Swerve. Rose’s faceplates turned redder. And zey remained optic contact with the floor, ze couldn’t say anything. 

“Thank you, both. Um. Rose, I'll see you soon.” Rung said, rushing out, Rose didn’t respond and chose to push past Rodimus and Ultra Magnus and Rodimus. 

It seems the two were in a mutual agreement to not speak of this again, Rose was unsure if their relationship was impacted from this encounter, but something told zir, zey were afraid to ever face Rung again. A fact which Rose was okay with. Zey were sure Rung felt the same as ze. Rose walked alone to zir habsuite feeling very upset, and laid in zir berth, all zey could do was look up at the ceiling and cry silently. 

Chapter Text

Zey couldn't sleep. That day played over and over and over again in zir processor. 

That image... 

Rung was a friend, someone who zey could count on for guidance and support often to walk in the comforts of his office to speak to him about zir wishes and future ideas. 

The same mech who zey listened to go on and on about model plane ships. 

This is a mech who was zir former therapist.

Zey regarded him as just a friend. But zey knew. Zey knew in that moment. That he wasn't just a friend to zir. It was more than a casual hookup, there was something there.

But there was one teensy problem. 

They can't explore that desire they so desperately crave. That desire that they felt that night was nothing more than a mistake. 

If zey couldn't face him, what could possibly compare to this? Better yet, how could zey fathom facing Rung after what had went down in that room?  

what would zey feel? sad? angry? confused? embarassed? or perhaps completely disorientated? 

Rose knew there was a small chance that Rung didn't feel the same, and that caused zir to in turn, not pursue a relationship farther. 

How was zey going to recover from this shitstorm? Better yet. How would this affect their friendship moving forwards?

Rose was scared of all the possible answers, but zey knew, zey knew, deep down that there was many possible outcomes to this but chose not to continue thinking. 

As the floor froze over, Rose debated on going to Ultra Magnus to change zir route. But before zey could go out the door opened. 

"Hey, Rose! Um, do you think you can come help me real quick?" It was Rodimus.

Rose and Rodimus never had any interactions at all, other from the causal greetings. They were just that busy. 

Rose didn't know what Rodimus needed help with just yet, but hey! This should atleast get zir away from Rung. 

Zey didn't know what zey were going to do if ze were in the same room as Rung, but rest assured; it wasn't going to end well. 

Rose forgotten how long the ship was, it was small on the outside but bigger in the inside, there were various rooms at the ready for each and everybot. 

Rose never minded that, it was a new thing that zey enjoyed. Ze knew about the confines of small spaces and structures of a ship since ze travelled through space often. 

Rodimus attempted numerous times to try and strike up a conversation, but Roses' silence and unwillingness to respond made it harder to do exactly that. 

So, in turn, Rodimus went silent and decided to wait until they arrived to their destination to talk to Rose, which is inside the ships engines. 

"Navis has been a little bit uncomfortable for awhile, he's not looking too well." Rodimus explains, "We thought you can help, since you've worked with ships before..." Rodimus said. 

Rose nods and walks up to the engine, Rose felt a nudge against zir leg and a toolbox was nearby. The floors of Navis then went back down. 

"Thank you Navis." Rose leans down to take a screwdriver and opened up the panel towards of the engine, zey noticed that some areas of the engine were leaking. 

Ze leans down and grabs a wrench before securing the leaking pipe. Rose wiped down the pipe from the excessive fluids left over. 

Zey put away the wrench as the toolbox was carried away by Navis' floors. "That should solve the discomfort that Navis is feeling, and possibly the creaking." 

Rose said, zey knew that they weren't a tech junky. But zey held basic knowledge about ships that zey could fix Navis. 

"Thank stars it wasn't anything serious." 

Rose nods. "Navis should take it easy, but what do I know? I'm not Ratchet." Rose said, wiping off zir servos from the motor oil. 

"The engine should at least have an upkeep for every two deca-cycles. I really should bring this up to Magnus, assuming he already knows." Rose said. 

"You know Magnus, he's too busy focusing on the sprinklers to even come in here, between you and me..." Rodimus comes closer to Rose, "He'd have a spark attack if he saw how this room is." Rodimus whispers.

Rose knew what Rodimus was talking about, Ultra Magnus has severe OCD. The slightest of anything out of order were enough to make the Commander freak.

There was at least 50 rules set in place for how organized the ship may be. By organize he meant cleanliness. 

Rose shook zir helm and turned to face Rodimus. "I have to go, Rodimus have you seen Magnus?" Rose inquires.

Rodimus places a servo on his chin in thought. "Magnus is in our captains quarters. Why'd you ask?" 

"Oh nothing far too important I suppose, I needed to make some changes to my schedule. Thanks for telling me!" 

Rung found himself at his desk tidying it, he was still thinking about the night before. 

He couldn't really fathom why he reacted the way he did, he knew things wouldn't be the same after this. 

So why did he still feel something? Why must he torture himself with these thoughts plaguing his thought system? 

He needed to stop thinking about zir, just for one moment. 

He looked at the clock in hopes of it distracting him, it was almost time for his first session. 

Usually, Rose would have left... 
By then...

There he goes thinking about zir, then again, he wouldn't show up after what had went down that night in that locked room. 

He wished that things could return to normal, but he knew things will never be normal.

Not ever again. 

He knew in situations like these, he wasn't supposed to think like this.

But can you really fault him for feeling this way? He potentially lost a close friend to him, possibly jeopardized their relationship...

And you THINK they could go back as friends, without there being any impact to the relationship?

Highly unlikely. 

With a sigh, Rung awaited his first patient of the day. Once again left alone with the sinking feeling of unresolved feelings. 

Chapter Text

The walk to Ultra Magnus felt like a walk of shame even though Rose didn't do anything to warrant this feeling. 

Rose walked down what seemed to be for an eternity, walking  into the same room and heading down the hallways which seemed to repetive to the captains quarters. She knew exactly which door he was in, but as she walked closer she could hear another voice coming from inside.

"You were supposed to stay away, not come here."

She couldn't make out any words, only a few snippets. The other person sounded angry or frustrated at something. It was clear from his tone that they had a fight.
Rose took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

"Go away!" he screamed. "I said I don't want you here!"

"Magnus, please! I need to talk to you," she pleaded through the door.

She could tell Megatron and Ultra Magnus were fighting once again, it wasn't everyday that the two will clash with different ideals. Especially since he was the Decepticon leader, Magnus was bound to be wary.

It took a few more minutes before the door opened.

"What do you want?" Ultra Magnus demanded. His face was flushed and covered in grime. He looked exhausted and worn. Rose could see why. He probably hadn't slept in days now.

Her eyes darted around the room, trying to gauge where he was sleeping. There was apparently no bed in his office, so it could mean that Ultra Magnus has been working himself to the bone. 

She sighed and made her way to Magnus and looked him in the optics. "I came to speak to you regarding my schedule."

He looked confused for just a moment before recognition dawned on him. "Oh yeah, we can reschedule it, right now we really-"

"It is important that you take care of yourself. You look terrible. Please allow me to make sure you're alright. I am not going anywhere until we finish this discussion."

Ultra Magnus let out a sigh, and sat down, It was clear she was not going to let it go. He closed his optics and ran his servo down his face before looking back up at her.

"Alright. But you have to promise not to interrupt me again. This is important."

"I will try my best," she said confidently. She didn't think she would actually be able to keep her word. 

"Well, there was an incident with Rung, and I wanted to reschedule." Rose said, looking up to Magnus, his faceplates scrunched up and he looked down. 

"What happened in that room?" Magnus inquires. Rose agreed not to talk of this, so she sighed. 

"I can't exactly say, but I want to make the change. I'm exactly sure Rung would want this too." Rose said, remembering the expression Rung had on his faceplates that night. 

His faceplates were stern but there was some kind of sadness lurking in his eyes. She wondered if she should apologize to Rung. Perhaps he'll give her a chance to fix everything? He doesn't have to forgive her...but he must know, right?

"Alright then, consider it changed, I won't notify Rung of your decision. Judging by your schedule its always booked so I might let you have the first few hours to yourself." Magnus said. 

"In exchange, would you rest?" Rose asked. Magnus sighed. 

"I will rest." Magnus said. 

"Alright then, deal." Rose states, shaking Magnus' servo.  Her own servo shook as she shook his servo.
There is something off about the interaction. Something isn't quite right about this situation, however, it's hard to put her finger on it. Perhaps tomorrow she will figure it out.

With that settled Rose excused herself and left the room to her own chambers.

Rung couldn't concentrate. He was in session after session trying his best to forget what happened that night, but the thought of it refused to disappear. There was no way of it going away. 

He had no one to confide in, nobody who would understand. Nobody but Ultra Magnus, but Magnus would never speak ill of Rose, he wouldn't do that. He didn't think that much of his friend anyway.

He needed somebody to talk to, somebody who would understand, someone who he could trust. But he couldn't trust himself, not after that night they shared. 

Guilt was beginning to eat at him, he debated on sending Rose a letter but it wouldn't make an impact. 

They had sex that night, it wasn't out of mutual love, but rather panic. He remembered all the explicit details he and Rose got into. 

 He recalled how it felt being intimate, it still did. It just brought the memories back faster than he ever wanted them to. And when he told Magnus how their relationship turned sour, well, Magnus became angry with him.

He knew Magnus cared about everyone here, yet he chose to ignore what rules Magnus had set up. 

Magnus was Roses' adoptive father. And he knew how much Rose meant to him, he told him what happened that night and he took it surprisingly well. But the whole ordeal had shaken him. How many people does he trust?

Rung knew the answer to this question, he trusted everyone here. They were all family and friends to him, he loved them dearly and was very grateful that the crew accepted him into this voyage. It felt strange that he didn't know how to articulate his otherwise easy to keep in check emotions. 

A sigh escaped from his lips. He didn't know how much longer he could do this for. How much longer until he completely crumbles? 

He wanted to wait until his sessions end today to see if Rose would stop by and talk once more. But she never did. 

After his session he went straight to his quarters to avoid seeing anyone. When he entered his chamber he immediately began pacing, unable to sit still.

How did things escalate to this point? How could he have done such a stupid thing? This was all his fault, if he hadn't fallen in love with her.

He kept denying his feelings the more he engaged with her, but eventually it came full circle that night. The cybertronian was too close to him, he didn't fault her for that. But he just wished he'd been better about it all the while. Maybe he could've prevented this entire mess, he shouldn't have gotten too attached to her. Then maybe Rose wouldn't have gotten hurt.

He know she was hurt and he couldn't blame her. She probably had feelings for him as well, but never thought about it. 

He thought that he could handle having feelings for Rose. He assumed it was a phase, she'll grow out of it and forget him like everybody else. But after seeing her lose hope that night, he realized that it could never happen like that again.

As the realization sank in, he collapsed onto his berth  and buried his helm in his servos, his vents picking up a pace and becoming more labored. Tears began forming in his optics, the pain was overwhelming.

He tried to hold his tears back, but he knew it was futile. His vision blurred and his audio processors filled with static. Soon the sound stopped . Everything turned silent and quiet.

All he could feel was a sense of loss. Loss of someone dear to him, loss of a friendship, loss of something precious. All because he was selfish enough to fall in love with someone who was never meant to be with someone like him. Someone who deserved better. Someone who didn't possibly like him.

He hated it. Hated how weak he was, hated the fact that he let Rose get close enough to make him doubt his decisions.

But above all, he hated how powerless he felt.

It wasn't fair. He never meant to hurt anyone. Never meant to cause pain or distress. He was a therapist for primus sake! He wasn't the type to hurt people. 

He was so used to doing his job that when he started feeling the effects of his actions, the repercussions of his actions, it scared him.

He never felt so helpless before. He knew it was wrong, knew it was dangerous, knew that it was going to cost him everything. But for the sake of others  and his career he kept going along with it.
Because in the end nothing mattered. Nothing mattered to him except helping people.

That's all he ever wanted, even if he couldn't help everyone, he at least wanted those around him to be happy and well adjusted. To live a life free of worry or stress. 

Yet he ended up hurting so many people and he was tired. So tired of fighting alone and afraid. So exhausted of the burden he was carrying.

The weight of it was starting to crush him. It was slowly killing him on the inside. He was suffocating under his self hatred. It's only taken one person to ruin him. One person to bring him down to his lowest point. That's how he felt, he was drowning. Slowly suffocated beneath the rubble of his mistakes and the pain that had become a part of him. It made it harder to get up every time.

He just couldn't move anymore, he didn't dare to get up. Not knowing what was going to happen next. He couldn't do anything, he couldn't defend himself, or protect himself. He was powerless and weak. It made everything seem hopelessly bleak.

 It made him feel helpless. Like he didn't even matter.

He just wanted the suffering to end, he just wanted the pain to end. He just wanted the burden to be off his shoulders, he just wanted the crushing guilt to go away. He just wanted everything to stop.
But he couldn't do any of that, he felt like he wasn't in control of his own actions anymore the further he went. 

 It was like he was in autopilot mode and he couldn't stop it. Couldn't change anything or stop the pain. 
He was so lost within the depths of despair that he had no other choice but to accept it. Accept that he would spend the rest of his life trapped in this prison of pain he created for himself. That he would never escape it.

And he wasn't ready for it. He couldn't take it, he couldn't face the reality of what he has allowed to occur.

He laid awake staring at the ceiling wishing that there was something he could do to save himself, to relieve the anguish and pain that was plaguing him. He knew that there were people who could give him solace. People who can help ease the pressure off his chest. He didn't want to bother anybody and most importantly he didn't want to trouble anyone with his problems, he didn't wish to cause them unnecessary anxiety. So he chose to bury them deep inside himself. To lock them away where no one could see.In time it all would fade away. Eventually his worries would leave him.

Eventually he would heal. Maybe not completely, but enough to survive.
Maybe then he wouldn't suffer the way he did right now.

But that wasn't likely. Because deep down he knew that even if he would heal someday everything would still be in turmoil. Everything would be broken and it would never return to normal. And he wasn't sure he was capable of dealing with the aftermath.

But what other options did he have? What else could he do? He couldn't fathom facing Rose, his own emotions would sabotage him.  And he wouldn't blame her for that either.
He really didn't deserve her anyway, but he would never tell her that. Never tell her the truth. If anything he had already caused her pain, she may hate him for it. But he was desperate to fix things, to put some distance between them so he didn't have to remind himself of the position they were in, in that room. 

A one night stand was to surely cause some hidden feelings to arise. But, it wasn't supposed to go anything like it.  He never planned it this way, but now he found himself getting caught up in the moment without thinking.

He knew there would inevitably be consequences, he knew that eventually this was all coming to an end, sooner rather than later.

But he never thought he would ever find himself in this situation. Never thought he would allow something to come between him and Rose, he knew she cared deeply for him. And he was also certain she reciprocated that affection, he could see it. He could see the soft look in her eyes and hear it in her voice whenever she talks about him.
She always looked up to him. 

Perhaps thats why she went forward with it that night, he wasn't her and she wasn't him, all he knew was that it impacted their relationship. It was something he would always regret for the rest of his life.

He wondered if she regretted it too, did she resent him? Had she told Skids or anyone about their encounter? Did she cry in the early morning hours? Was she crying now?

He didn't know.  He didn't know how much time passed, he didn't know what time it was now. But eventually he felt his systems shut down, signalling him that it was late and he needed to recharge.

He decided that it was time to turn the lights off and head to bed. He stood from his berth  and walked towards his door, his digits brushing against the side of his frame as he passed by it, feeling the cold metal underneath his touch.

His mind still remained blank, he was still struggling to process things, still trying to figure out whether or not he was making a mistake in letting his emotions run wild.

Chapter Text

Rose walked through the halls, lost in thoughts. It seems as though Magnus's words stuck with her. They haunted her all week, each day seemed like it was the last moment she had left Rung, but they also helped remind her why she wanted to move forward. For the sake of everyone around her.

She knew she couldn't avoid Rung forever, eventually they would come face to face with one another. 

And that unfortunately, was today. It was one of those days where Rodimus dragged the whole crew with him on one day of the week to hang out together in one of Navis' many countless rooms. 

Those meetings were mandatory. She couldn't back out of them even if she wanted. 

She and Rung shared the same friends and they will surely know what's up between the two and ask why they were acting strange. 

Rose didn't know what to say, she was emotionally unprepared to face Rung this soon, but nonetheless she made her way to the rec room. 

She saw a few bots there. Skids and of course Rung were there. She sighed and sat down far from the usual table she seated herself at. 

No other bots knew why Rung and Rose were avoiding, some assumed that they had a fight, which was far from the truth. Rung and her had a one night stand they silently agreed to never speak to one another again.

But even then that'll catch the attention of the others.  So she was prepared for the inevitable conversation.

As much as she disliked the idea of facing Rung, he deserved an explanation for everything, right? After all the damage done to his psyche by his guilt, the least Rose could do is explain things to him.
So she looked over towards him and noticed he was already looking at her.

They locked eyes, for a moment she feared for his sanity, but she decided to ignore the feeling and just look away.

A few more minutes passed before they felt eyes on them. And sure enough, a few seconds later Rodimus approached them.
"Hey guys! Are you guys having a party or smooching?"

Everyone turned towards him with disgust on their faces, except Rung whose expression remained stoic.

"Not interested." Skids stated in response, while looking at his friend.

"We're not doing anything. We just want to enjoy the peace and quiet of Navis," Rose said.

"Well too bad, because it looks like I'm here to keep you company." Rodimus added pointing to himself with a grin.

Rose groaned, and rolled his optics. Skids chuckled and gave him a playful punch. 

It was clear that Rodimus liked the bot a lot, although no one can blame him. Skids was kind, caring and protective bot. 

Rose was sure that Skids would do anything to help a friend in need, but Rose couldn't bring herself to ask Skids about friendship advice, as Rodimus and Skids talked, Rose found herself alone. So she decided to keep her helm down. 

The rest of the time passes in silence, everyone focused on what the other is saying. Rose didn't realize how close her head was to her knees until Rodimus put his hand on hers, trying to rouse her out of her daze.

"Earth to Rose." He said with a chuckle.  "Are you listening to what I was saying?"

She raised her head to see him staring at her with a soft gaze in his eyes.

She smiled gently at him and shook her head slightly.

"I am sorry to have drifted off, I was just thinking about something." Rose explained sheepishly.

"You think too loud sometimes, it distracts me."

The two chuckled awkwardly and avoided each other's eye contact. This went unnoticed by anyone else, as Rodimus continued talking, she wasn't aware that Rodimus was addressing her, thats how bad her daydreaming can get. 

But when the time came for Rose to be addressed again, this time, she was ready. 

"So..." Skids drawled, "What happened between you and Rung?" Skids asked her. 

"I don't have any clue what your talking about, we're fine." Rose said, tapping her digits on the table. Skids gave her a look, and she sighed. 

"There's nothing the matter, we're fine." She said. 

"Bullslag, I'm your friend I hear and SEE everything. I know there's something going on between you two." Skids said. 

Rose's smile dropped, she knew the answer to this question was gonna hurt her, but she thought if Skids knew why the two had stopped speaking after all this time she would feel better about it, she had tried so hard not to fall into this trap. But the damage was done and no amount of pretending would change that.

"Nothing happened, there's nothing happening between us." Rose said firmly. She took a deep breath and stared at her friends, hoping that somehow one of them would give her the comfort she craved.

However, the moment she saw Rung standing a few feet away she felt her spark drop into her tanks.

She hoped that Rung wouldn't say anything. Much to the chagrin of Rose, Rung immediately smiled. 

"Yeah, there's nothing going on, we just drifted apart because of our schedules." Rung explained. Rose smiled, as this would, hopefully; quell Skids' and anyone elses suspicion. 

Unfortunately, this didn't work and Skids gave her a look that showed she was screwed. Skids always seemed to understand her well and she wished he hadn't been present.
He gave her an apologetic smile.

"Look, I know its hard for you. I get it, but I don't think either one of you are seem okay. If you want, you can always talk to me about whatever happened, but I'd rather you not tell me everything. Trust me, I understand."

That was it. He finally understood. He understood that she couldn't handle being around Rung anymore without thinking about him, or wanting him.

Rose was in pain and felt misery each and every time she was in the same room as Rung, she couldn't bring herself to talk with Rung at all, she couldn't face him. Not after what went down in that room. 

"Thanks Skids, but you've been nothing but supportive and helpful lately. I appreciate that, but I can handle my own feelings. I'll see you later?" Rose asked smiling slightly. 
Slightly... she wasn't really in a good mood. She just needed to clear her mind and forget about the past few days.

So she sat elsewhere. Skids wrbt back to talking to Rodimus, and by now, Swerve had joined in that conversation blabbing on and on. Rose sighed and listened to her thoughts. 

Its been only a few days, and Rose felt sick to her tanks, feeling of nausea... boiled in her stomach. 

Her throat constricted, making it nearly impossible to breathe, her head started throbbing painfully. She stood up abruptly and headed toward the closest bathroom, her vision blurred slightly.

When Rose entered the restroom and closed the door behind her, she leaned against it for support.

Her servos grasped her helm, and she shook it. The lingering feeling of nausea returned and she found herself throwing up. 

She probably thought it was the stress that was causing her to throw up, she knew it was stress. She didn't think it was too serious.  Her symptoms were mostly related to anxiety, it was only getting worse and worse these days, but she thought she'd stop when she stopped seeing Rung.

Rose threw up for a good minute, until she stopped throwing up and leaned heavily on the toilet. Tears escaped her eyes as she slid down the wall. Her thoughts were interrupted by a knock at the door. 

Then a voice responded shortly after. "Hey Rose? Are you okay?" It was Skids, he might've saw her left and went after her. 

Bless his spark. "I'm coming in if that's alright." Rose didn't answer, she couldn't bring herself to say no. She really needed the comfort right now. 

As much as she hated it.
Skids opened the door and saw Rose sitting in fetal position leaning on the sink, tears streaming down her face. He immediately stepped closer, kneeling beside her, resting a servo on her shoulder. "Rose..."  

Rose couldn't bear to look at him and instead turned her head sideways towards the toliet and let out a small sob, which resulted in another round of vomiting.
After she finished throwing up, she wiped the remaining vomit away from her mouth, and sighed sadly.

"I don't wanna talk about it right now Skids.." Rose croaked out.

"Okay." Skids whispered rubbing circles in her back, "You don't have to. Just take it easy, I'll stay with you till you're ready to leave. Do you mind telling me what's wrong?" He added softly.

"Rung." Rose answered quietly, still avoiding to look directly at him.

Skids nodded in understanding. "Do you want some energon or something?" He suggested.

"Yes please. Could it be low grade energon? I anything stronger than that, I won't be able to hold down at all." She asked softly.

"Of course."

"Just give me five minutes, then bring it for me, kay?"

"Sure thing, I'll wait outside." Skids replied before leaving the bathroom.
Rose stayed inside, trying to calm down her racing processor, and try to make sense of what was going through her head. 

She had to admit, that it wasn't her proudest moment, even though she told Skids she could manage herself and they both know how true that is. But when she looked into his optic light and saw his concern, she could no longer stand it. How could he care that much? Even if it was only temporary, could she have gotten away with lying to Skids? 

She shook her helm to rid of these thoughts, as she waited for Skids to return with the energon.  

As soon as he walked back into the restroom and handed her the cube, she quickly gulped down half the cube before returning the cube to him.

Skids frowned slightly. "Is there anything else you need?"

"No thank you Skids, that should do it for now."

Skids shrugged. "Okay, the group meeting should be over soon, if you want I could tell Rodimus you don't feel well and that you went to your habsuite early." 

She smiled at the offer and nodded gratefully. "Thanks Skids."

"No problem Rose." He replied grinning.

"See you soon."

Rose waved goodbye to Skids as he exited the bathroom and headed back to join his friends.  Rose remained in the room, she was feeling restless. Something kept nagging at her and wouldn't go away.

It bothered her deeply, especially since she didn't know exactly what was bothering her so badly, or who it was. And that made things even more difficult.

It was starting to feel like a puzzle. After she was sure that Skids had left, she locked the door behind her and collapsed on the floor. She put her head in her hands.

She couldn't lie anymore. Something had to change. And she knew that it will be difficult and risky, but she had to do it. For herself, for everyone. 

And for him.

For Rung.

Her spark ached for Rung and for that alone she knew she had to do it.

For her sake, and his. Getting up, Rose walked back to her quarters. No one stopped her, she assumed that Skids already told Rodimus what had happened, she was grateful for a friend like Skids, opening the door to her room, resting tonight. 

Chapter Text

"It's going down, I can see it! It looks like someone has started to spray paint." Magnus said looking out the door as he stared across the main room to the graffiti on navis' halls. 
 
He turned around and walked away from the door, he sighed knowing this paperwork was going to be a major pain in the ass. He had a few suspects. He will deal with them soon, instead, he commed Rose.

"Rose. You might need to come clean this mess up." Magnus said. 

"Understood." Rose said, she hung up, Rose didn't feel too good, she couldn't bring herself to get out of her berth. She was still nausous and felt sick to her tanks. Feeling a tugging against her spark, she tossed and turned trying to lay down but the pain persisted. She felt sweat pour down her helm. 

She decided to sleep in some more, that graffiti can wait, the tugging against her spark persisted and she let out a pained groan. 

She opened her optics, the room around her spun. Her vision was blurry, she blinked once again and finally managed to focus enough to look around. Her stomach lurched as a wave of dizziness washed over her, and she fell back onto the berth.
The tugging increased until it hurt too much to bear. Nausea increased tenfold, Rose gags, shotting up as she rushed straight to the bathroom at breaknecking speed, onlookers watched as Rose rushed by fast. 

Rose made it to the restroom and vomits the empty contents of her stomach.  Panting heavily as she leans forward on the edge of the toliet. Tears prick her optic ridges.

"Come on, you're doing great! Keep it together!" She muttered, rubbing her face. Finally getting enough oxygen into her tank, Rose felt herself begin to relax a bit. She slowly lifted herself off of the cold tiles.

She needed to see Ratchet in the medbay right now, but she didn't think it was too bad. She needs a long rest. So, she commed Magnus. 

"Magnus, I won't be able to come clean the mess up. I just threw up. I don't feel good." 

"Understood. Go back to your quarters at once and recharge." Magnus orders. Rose sighs and nods as Magnus hung up. As she walked towards her quarters she was met by Ratchet. 

"What happened to you? Why did you come in?" Ratchet questioned.
"I'm okay, really, I'm fine. I just threw up and I just want to go rest." Rose explains. Ratchet doesn't look convinced, but he lets it go, be told Rose to get alot of rest. 

"I'll do that." Rose promised, turning to leave. Ratchet watches as Rose leaves the medbay, he sighs as the sound of Rose pedesteps echoes in the halls.

He knew something wasn't right with her. 

 There is no way she should be able to throw up so badly when she hasn't eaten anything in days, not only that, her  spark was beating abnormally. He knows Rose better than anyone else in the Lost Light, which is saying something, because a medic knows everything. And even after everything, even then he knows something isn't right with her. 

But he's unsure about what.
As she walks through the halls of the ship Ratchet notices two things. One; his sensors were picking up an odd energy reading coming from Rose. Two; Rose was feeling unwell, that meant something was seriously wrong. But whatever it was it was keeping him from asking questions.

 Something he wouldn't have been happy about anyway. If something was bothering Rose, then she should talk to them about it, not make them feel guilty by keeping it from them. Even if they know something is wrong.

He makes a quick call to the captain before heading off to the medbay. He was reporting Roses' condition. He didn't want to see Rose out and about in her frail state. 

Rung was busy sorting through his files, the lingering thought of Rose once again remerging in his processor. 

He spent so long thinking of her, after what went down in that room he still thinks of Rose from time to time. 

 Every time, he tries to put it out of mind but it never works, he can't help it. He misses Rose...and that's why whenever he has the chance he'll try and talk to her, even if she doesn't want to speak, he just wants to hear from her voice.

 Just her voice, just Rose's voice. His thoughts drift to her almost daily.

And when they do he can't help but wonder if she misses him. Does she think of him sometimes as well?  

 Does she miss the days when they would sit side by side in silence, watching the stars?

He feels stupid for thinking about such trivial things. 

 He doesn't think of her as a silly little thing that he can't have anymore, he thinks about her as the cybertronion he cherished more than anything in existence. He wonders if that was enough for her. After all, the whole idea of love was supposed to last forever.

He then only realized, he was in love with her.  The realization came suddenly and completely unexpected. It took him aback and confused him greatly.

How could he feel so strongly?
How could he ever compare to the other mechs in his crew? To Rose's twin brother?

He had nothing to offer to Rose and yet he found himself falling for Rose in the most romantic sense imaginable. 

And it hurt. Hurt like a glitch. 
Why did this feel so good?
He doesn't understand. Why did being in love cause this sort of pain?
"Oh god, I've fallen for her. How am I supposed to tell her this?" He whispered as he sat back and tried to process everything.

He knew there was no way he would ever be good enough for her.
But if Rose loved him too...then how was he supposed to show her what he felt?

Feelings are so hard to understand.  
They are a lot of emotions, a lot that we just don't seem to understand or understand at first glance,
Love is complicated. 

Sometimes when the universe throws us curveballs we have to take it or leave it. Sometimes life throws us curveballs, sometimes life gives us a perfect opportunity. He wanted to say something to her, but he knew it was too late. Too late to ask her out, or confess his feelings. That night, it was all that he could think about. All that he could think about was Rose and how much he loved her.

The night in that room wasn't supposed to impact their relationship like it did, nor was it supposed cause him to catch those feelings. 

His spark twisted. It hurt so much. 
His heart ached. That night changed both of their lives forever.

But, he knew Rose loved him back just as deeply. So he hoped to Primus, that he was worth everything Rose gave him.

Everything that he had done wrong, everything he had caused. The crashing of the Fateful Archetype still remained firm in his processor. 

He didn't want to hurt Rose, he was scared to hurt someone again, he was scared to hurt Rose. 

But he was a therapist, despite all of his worries about hurting someone, he knew he wouldn't hurt Rose, but deep down inside him, what if he did? 

Would Rose be okay?

Could she forgive him?

It was all too much to handle right now, he didn't know what he wanted.
All he knew was that he hated having these mixed feelings, he hated it with every ounce of his spark.

So, he hid it away, hidden it away somewhere. Maybe deep within himself, where no one would find it.

He hated being in pain.

He hated hurting.

But he couldn't stop the feeling that rose within him. It felt like a hurricane within, threatening to consume him. Every single part of him longed to see her again, to feel her hand brush against his.

And yet, he also wanted to run away from her as far as possible. Not just to protect her. 

Because he knew, he knew that he'd give anything to never lose Rose again.

Even if it killed him. 

Chapter Text

“So what exactly is this about?” Rose questioned as she stared at Ultra Magnus with confusion on her faceplates. He was pacing back and forth across the hallways like some kind of lunatic. It reminded her of the way Ratchet paced, only in reverse.

"You've been nauseous for a week now have you?" Magnus asked.

"Yes, I mean it isn't really that complicated, It's just a minor bug..." 

Rose tried to tell Magnus, she knew he was overprotective and worried for her sake. But something was off and he wanted her to check it out.  She wasn't gonna lie though she DID worry herself sick but she didn't want to bother anyone.

Magnus stopped mid stride, his helm cocked to the side and squinted his optics at her.

"Rose... You're not planning anything stupid right?" He asked, concern lacing his voice. 

Oh no, he saw through her again. Of course he did. 

"No! Nothing like that!" Rose assured him.

She could sense he didn't believe her and honestly, she didn't blame him. There were a few times during the last few weeks when she had been acting strange.

He took her by surprise a lot of times.

He would come into her bunk while she was in recharge and then start asking questions. It seemed like the questions got more and more personal each time. Rose would think up a lie to cover for it, she had done it before but she never told him that.

Now was one of those times.
Rose sighed and rubbed at her optics with a servo.

"I haven't been doing much lately, I guess I need sleep." She said, trying to make him happy.

His posture loosened up somewhat and a smile tugged at his lips as he turned back to face her.

"You know that doesn't help me right? I need to see if there's something going on. If you can't talk to me or any of us about it, then I need to know what." He stated matter of factly.

Rose opened her mouth to protest but couldn't find the words. 
What was she supposed to say here? That there was nothing wrong because she just needed some recharge and it'll all go away soon? No, that wouldn't fly. Not when her adoptive father looked like he was ready to explode from worry.

Her eyes flicked down towards her feet, her spark felt heavy. It was like someone scooped out a chunk of it and left an ache inside. Maybe she did need rest after all.

"Fine... Just promise not to send anyone else in if I say something I shouldn't? Or make me sit through a whole lecture?" Rose requested, her voice was small, barely above a whisper.

"Of course." Magnus replied immediately and moved towards her, crouching down so that they both were at eye level.

"Look... Rose, I'm not going anywhere. Okay? This stuff, whatever it is... I'm here for you. We'll figure this out together." Magnus reassured her, wrapping his arms around her shoulders in a warm, tight hug.

Rose melted against him, closing her optics and returning the hug. Her head rested on his chassis, breathing deeply in an effort to calm her rapidly beating spark.

"Okay." She breathed and let him guide her back to her room, the pair of them falling into routine quickly. Rose lay still, staring at the ceiling. It hurt, it hurt a lot, to lie here and pretend everything was okay. She felt like she couldn't breathe. At least Magnus didn't press her for answers anymore.

He simply sat beside her, holding her hand. After she fell asleep, he made sure to keep watch outside her door.

Chapter Text

It had been three weeks since the incident. Three weeks of avoiding one another. Rose wasn't feeling too well, she continued to sleep in as her adoptive sire Ultra Magnus met with her. 

 He would make the trip to meet with Rose soon. She hadn't spoken to Rung since then and she didn't like it much. It was so quiet without him around. But it was okay because Ultra Magnus made sure to keep her busy by keeping up with her lessons and chores and also giving her some company on occasion.

Rose found herself relaxing during these check ins, it was nice being with his large frame again but this time she missed him more than anything else. She missed his warmth and the sound of his low voice. And worst of all, she missed the way his soft servos would caress her faceplates when the conversation lulled.

The way he would cuddle her and read her bed time stories, bring her med-grade energon to soothe her tummy aches. 

And when the situation called for it, he'd give her cuddles. Rose loved spending time with her adoptive sire. It was nice he took time out of his busy schedule to attend to her. 

Magnus had to do work, but he checked in on Rose from time to time. Rose was still feeling pain in her spark but her stomach was swollen and tender. She was pretty sure she was sick or at least coming down with something. She couldn't feel her stomach without it being senstive. 

She decided not to tell anyone about the sickness and just wait it out like Ultra Magnus told her to. Rose tried hard to take everything in stride and just act normal even though her spark hurt and tears were building up in her optics.

She was determined not to ruin things.
 
Rose just laid there, listening to Ultra Magnus read a book he picked up from the ship library. Her chest felt heavy and her spark hurt but she couldn't focus on that right now. She wanted to enjoy her guardian's presence.

"I'm glad you're here." said Rose eventually breaking the silence between them. He looked up from his reading and smiled softly at her before leaning down and kissing her forehead lovingly.

 "Me too."

Magnus closed his book, and smiled at Rose but frowned at the obvious bulge in her stomach. 

 He reached out towards it and Rose flinched. She held her breath. The last thing she needed was him to touch her.

"Why haven't you eaten?" asked Magnus concerned. His optics widened when he realized what it might mean. Rose was pregnant? He hoped his suspicions were wrong. But if they weren't…

Then he has a lot to explain to when Red Alert came to visit, if Rose was pregnant then that means new boundries has to be set for the carrying to go well. He wasn't going to jump to those conclusions juuuust yet. 

"Um...it's just been a difficult couple of days...and I haven't really-" began Rose. Magnus cut her off gently placing his hands over hers. He knew she was lying but he decided not to push. That would come later.

If she wanted to speak of it then she would. Right now, he simply wanted her to rest and recover.

"I understand darling." said Magnus looking away from her face, his gaze dropping to the floor. For now, he just wanted to give her space while she was sick and in pain.

"That's ok Rose, I understand." he reassured her softly, rubbing her palm with the pad of his thumb. It was strange how someone so large could hold such tenderness.

He wondered what it would feel like to have a sparkmate who cared for you so deeply.

They sat like this together in companionable silence for several minutes and when he felt Rose begin to drift away into recharge, he tucked Rose in and gave her a kiss on her forehelm. 

For now, he has to file more paperwork. Exiting the room, Magnus looked once more at the sleeping Rose. And sighed closing it.  

Chapter Text

It was a normal morning, a selective amount of bots was gathered together in Swerve's Bar, enjoying what time of day the ship could afford. Rung sat by himself on his usual bar stool, staring into space while drinking his coffee. Skids approached him from behind him placing a hand on his shoulder making him nearly spill his drink. 

"Gah! S-Skids. Why did you scare me like that?!" Rung asked, adjusting his glasses properly. 

"Sorry Glasses. I just, came to sit next to you." Skids said, he wanted to check up with Rung. He was worried about him lately, after all the events he had experienced aboard ship. Skids sat next to him and ordered a drink, Rung took a sip and sighed. 

Rung debated on weither or not to tell Skids about his ever growing feelings towards Rose as Skids was both of their friends. 

But, he chose not to. It was better left unsaid. 

He turned his head to look at him, still watching him as if waiting for something. "Is something wrong Glasses? You seem distracted." 
 
Skids asked, he didn't know why but Rung seemed off today.

"I'm fine Skids." Rung said. 

Skids placed his hands on top of Rung's and looked at him.

"You're lying Rung." Rung tried to protest but stopped when he noticed how much harder he was trying to hide it.

Rung took a deep breath and exhaled. 

"I... I think I might have a small crush on Rose." Rung admits, Skids looked at him. 

"You MIGHT?" Skids questioned again. 

"Okay, so maybe not MIGHT, but I do most certainly have feelings for Rose, I just... I don't know if I should go for it..." Rung was trying to dance around the subject and context on why he was feeling this way. 

"What caused these emotions?" Skids pried, Rung sighs, knowing that he couldn't dance around it for much longer as he wanted. 

So, with a heavy spark, Rung decided to come clean. "Alright, if I tell you, will you promise not to tell anyone?" Rung asked, Skids nodded. 

"Alright, so. I'm assuming the locked room code was heard by everyone, right?" Rung asked. 

"Mhm." Skids said, intrigued on how this would go. 

"So, me and Rose decided to hang out before I got a little bit of work left to do. So we walked around Navis, right?" 

Skids nodded along to the story. 

"We walked in an empty room to chat for a bit, when Whirl and Swerve played a nasty prank and locked us in there. We unfortunately couldn't get the door opened. Navis couldn't open it either... So, I'm guessing as the result of panic, Rose and I interfaced..." Rubg explains. 

"And... Since then I've been thinking about Rose, romantically and I don't know what to do Skids." Rung finally says. 

Skids stared at him, taking a few moments to process everything. This was huge information to absorb, he had no idea how Rung managed to keep it a secret for so long.

"Well," Skids says after a moment of silence.

 "Well, first of all, you shouldn't rush things." Skids advised. "I'm not a licensed therapist like you, but even I know that rushing into these things is bad." Skids said. 

Rung nodded along to it, rushing wasn't a good idea. "Take it easy, and try and take it slow, first take some time off before you talk to her again, you always said, don't speak when your processor is full, it can lead to impulsive decisions, most importantly; tell her how you feel at any chance you get." Skids advised

Rung thought about it. Was this really the right thing to do? What would Rose say? Would she accept his feelings or reject them? What would happen then? He knew he couldn't live without Rose in his life.
Rung sighed once again. 

Maybe it was best not to say anything for now. Maybe, just maybe, everything would be alright in time.

"Thanks Skids, I'll think about it." Rung said, standing to leave.

"Don't forget to take care of yourself." Skids reminded him, following suit.

"Of course, thank you Skids." Rung smiled.

"Just call if you need anything okay?" Skids insisted.

"Oh, alright, alright." Rung laughs lightly. "I'll be sure to call you if it gets serious!" Rung promised.

"Right, I'll hold you to that." Skids smirks.

The pair said their goodbyes and went their separate ways.  Rung began to make his way to Rose's quarters. He took a deep breath and knocked gently at the doors. After several minutes pass, he knocked again.

No answer.

He felt his nerves begin to settle. She could have forgotten to lock the door from the inside, or simply hadn't woken up yet.

He then gave up, he didn't want to rush into this, so he walked back to his quarters and laid down on his berth. 

He looked up at the ceiling.

He'd rather face Rose now than wait forever. 

Chapter Text

Rose found herself back at the bathroom vomiting up the remainder of the energon she had. She still could barely keep the energon in her systems anymore. 

That's when she heard the door open from the outside. Rose tried not to move as she saw Rodimus coming into the room. He sat down next to her and put his hands on her shoulders. 

"How you feeling? You alright?" He asked, his voice was filled with concern.

"Not good, where is Magnus?" She asked, wiping her mouth again, Rodimus looked at Rose. 

"He had to take care of some things." Rodimus said. 

"I heard you vomiting, so I rushed towards the noise and sure enough here you were. Do you need support?" Rodimus asked. 

"Yeah, I need a cloth, I have to damp my forehelm in it." 

Rose wasn't aware that her frame was heating up until then.

"On it, Navis can you bring us a washrag?" Rodimus asked, Navis drops one from the trapdoor on the ceiling. 

Rodimus leaned down and picked up the washrag. "Thanks Navis!" He grins, the ship slammed the windows in response, he hands the towel to Rose who wiped her mouth. 
 
Then she rinsed the washrag off and placed it on her helm.  As soon as her helm was dry,  Rodimus  left and Rose went back to retching up the disgusting substance, she felt someone's arm around her, they pulled her back and held her up.
Rose couldn't tell who it was at first but after looking up she was surprised to see the face of her adoptive father, Magnus.

 
Magnus helped Rose sit down on the toilet lid and he sat down right next to her, he reached over and took the rag from her head, he pressed it against her forehead.

After Rose was done she felt better. She leaned over to the sink and washed her mouth out again, the nausea had stopped. Once finished she turned around and looked at her adopted father. Her expression softened and a smile appeared on her face.

"Thank you, Magnus." She said.

"No problem, I just wanted to make sure you were okay, what happened?" Magnus asked, his tone was softer than usual.

"The usual, vomiting..." Rose wiped her mouth. 

"Oh," was all Magnus said before he got up to go get her something to drink. When he came back, there was med-grade energon in front of him. She took it. "Do you want me to help you to your berth?" He offered.

Rose shook her head. "No, I'm fine."

"You have to see Ratchet sooner or later." Magnus said. 

Rose sighs. "I know..." She sighs, defeated. 

 Magnus puts a servo onto her shoulder.

"Let's get you cleaned up, come on." He says, pulling Rose up from her seat.

"But Magnus, I'll be fine... I promise-" She tried to protest.

"If you're going to see Ratchet, you're going to have to clean yourself up. Come on." Magnus said, holding onto her hand and guiding her away.

Rose sighed and allowed herself to be led away. She knew that there was no point arguing with Magnus. If there were any other time, Rose would argue with Magnus about everything. There isn't any other time.

 Rose is too weak to do anything else.

Magnus led Rose into one of the rooms and closed the door behind them. Rose looked at him. Magnus smiled and gently pushed her back onto the berth. Then, he sat down next to her, his servos folded across his chassis and looked over at Rose. Rose gave him a nervous chuckle. 

"Are you sure you wanna stay here with me while I rest?"

Magnus didn't say anything. Instead, he looked at Rose. His optics bore into hers. She shivered under his gaze and averted her eyes. "I think it will be best if you let me stay for the night, Rose."

Rose nodded, it was normal for her sire to stay by her side when he had the time to do so.  But this time, it felt different. It felt weird to have Magnus staying by her side instead of leaving her alone like he usually does.

It was nice having his hand on top of her knee. It helped calm her down and soothe her.

She looked up at her adopted father again. His optics seemed sad and his frame language showed it. His optics were slightly glazed over, his body posture showed how tired he truly was. And he really did look exhausted. She hadn't realized just how bad her condition had gotten. 
 
She should have taken better care of herself while she was on the ship.

This was why she was grateful to have him around. For awhile she acheived some semblance of peace. As her adopted sire soothed her, she nearly forgot the pain in her spark and chassis. 

Almost.

Rose felt tears well in her optics.
She was scared that her time might be up. But she knew deep inside that Magnus wouldn't allow that, even though he doesn't say much.

They stayed together until Magnus got tired of holding her.

Rose felt him lay down on the edge of the bed, he placed a hand on her chest.

"Come here, my child." He whispered. Rose immediately laid down facing Magnus, she curled up close to his chassis. 

He rocked Rose back and forth in a soothing manner. He hummed a small tune to help calm her nerves. 

Rose could feel Magnus's hands moving slowly up and down her torso, her legs intertwined with his.
Once Rose calmed down she fell asleep in his arms.

"Goodnight my little dove." Magnus whispered, stroking her helm softly.
And thus, it began.

It wasn't before long when Rose found herself back at the toilet vomiting once more. 

She managed to empty half of what she had been drinking today. 

"What happened?" Rose heard a voice ask her.

"I don't know!" Rose spat out, her voice cracking, her optics squeezed shut.

The voice sighed and Rose felt someone sit down next to her, she didn't recognize the person until they spoke, they weren't familiar enough to be anyone else other than Megatron himself.

"Here's a glass of water, drink." Megatron said, passing Rose his own glass of water. "Slowly."

Rose obeyed and drained the glass before giving it back to the mech, she thanked him and then went silent.

 Megatron watched his friend silently, he rubbed circles on her back.

"How long has this been happening?" Megatron finally asked. Rose sighed and leaned forward resting her chin against her knees.

"Since last few weeks." Rose replied simply. Megatron sighed and wrapped an arm around her shaking shoulders.

"Do you need me to speak with Magnus, do you think he will help you?" Megatron asked. Rose shrugged in response.

Megatron knew that Magnus would never let anything happen to his precious adoptive daughter.

But he also knows that Rose won't ever stop fighting until something happens. This is one of those times. Even though it's hard to see his beloved Rose in such state, he knows that Magnus will find a way to make sure she doesn't get hurt. 

Rose is too stubborn to give up so easily. The only reason why Rose is still able to fight through this sickness is because Magnus is always by her side helping her.

"Would you mind if I spoke to Magnus?" Megatron asked Rose.
Rose shook her head. "Go ahead, I'm going to go back to sleep." She muttered, heading back to her berthroom. 

When she was gone, Megatron made himself comfortable. Rose had fallen into recharge almost instantly once she returned to her room, but she still hadn't slept well.

Chapter Text

Rose took a deep breath outside of the Medbay, after further debate and a bit of spooking and psyching zirself out zey decided to enter the medbay. 

Ratchet seemed to be working on something and ze stood in the waiting room like area until Ratchet noticed zir. 

"Are you here for a check up?" Ratchet inquires, Rose nods and Ratchet beckons zir forward. 

Rose came to where Ratchet was and sat down on the med slab. He was typing a few things down more than likely checking Rose in as a patient. When all that was done, he made his way to Rose and did a standard check up and logging Rose in, the real questioning began. 

"What are you in for?" Ratchet asked, Rose takes a deep breath and looked up at Ratchet. 

"This may be a little farfetched... But..." Rose starts. 

"Nonsense... Please do tell me what's the issue." Ratchet said. 

"Alright, so I've been advised by a couple of bots to see you for awhile now, and..." Rose takes a deep breath.

"And?" Ratchet asked. 

"... I've been throwing up more and more recently..." Rose finally said. 

"Okay..." Ratchet finished typing on his computer. 

"..." Rose went silent, Ratchet walked up to get something. Ze watched as Ratchet picked a book off the shelf and put it back up, he traced a single digit against the various books before landing upon one. 

Pulling the book from its spot, Ratchet began flipping to the "C" section and stopping at the "Car" section. Before landing upon the words "Carrying." Ratchet placed the book back. He already knew what the issue was but he needed to clarify first. 

"To clarify, how long does this period for vomiting last for?" Ratchet asked. 

"Until the Afternoons starting at the mornings." Rose admits, with that confirmation, Ratchet turned back to the bookshelf and looked down pulling out another book titled "Carrying and You: How to Raise a Healthy Newspark" 

Ratchet looked into it. "Well for starters, do you know who you fornicated with to produce them?" Ratchet asked. 

"Yes, it was Rung." Rose confirms. 

Ratchet froze. He turned to face Rose, "Did you say, Rung?" The medic asked. 

"Uh, yeah. Why's that?" Rose asked. 

"Just nothing its strange, we thought the two of you weren't speaking." Ratchet admits. 

"It was partially a reason why we aren't speaking." Rose said. 

"And do you want to keep it?" Ratchet asked. 

Rose nods. 

"In that case, here's what you need to do." Ratchet said, "Okay, so you might want to tell Rung about the carrying, what the book said to do is that you have to get the bot that you interfaced with to fornicate with you again, to produce mech fluids for the newspark to form if you want to keep it. Otherwise it'll fizzle out and disappear completely." Ratchet explains. 

Rose takes a deep breathe, ze took a few seconds to process that ze were in fact, sparked. Ze began to shake nervously, Ratchet noticing that ze were starting to get shaky grabbed zir arms to steady them. 

"Hey, it's going to be okay. What's the issue?" Ratchet asked. 

"I'm just nervous okay? I never... I never really been a carrier before." Rose admits. 

"Rose, listen, are you sure you want to take care of this child?" Ratchet asked. 

"Yes, atleast... I believe Rung deserves to know..." Rose said. 

Ratchet sighs. "If you're sure. Please be careful." 

Rose nods and waits patiently for Ratchet to speak. Once he is done he hands zir the book he just handed zir earlier, it was called "Fertilizing". Rose opens it and begins reading the instructions. 

When ze finishes she looks up at Ratchet, confused by what ze saw.

"Are you sure about this? Because if you're not sure about this I can make an appointment here." Ratchet said.

Rose shook zir head. 

"If anyone asks tell them you're ill." Ratchet tells zir.

"Okay." Rose agrees with him and heads to zir quarters. When ze enters the doors slide shut behind zir. 

Sitting on zir bed, she flips open the book and begins to read again.
The page began with the diagram of the cycle, and then explained how to fertilize the newspark. It stated that the newspark would grow quickly and be strong. Rose frowned as ze read further down. There were some other words ze didn't understand. 

Ze continued to flip through the pages till ze reached the end of the text.

A smile crept onto Rose's face, this was perfect. The only issue was how ze was gonna explain to Rung why ze was talking to him again. Rose sighed, thinking. It would be best to start by saying it was because of the pregnancy. Then later they could talk about their options.

Rose took a deep intake of air before calling out for Jukebox. The blue minibot appears.

"Jukebox, can you give me Rung's schedule? I need to talk to him." Rose requests.

"Sure!" Jukebox responds, heading to the door. "See ya Rose!" With that, he was gone and the door closed.

Rose waited for Jukebox to send Rung's schedule. 

Once the schedule arrived Rose read through it, the information inside made her giddy. If everything went according to plan the newspark would arrive at the beginning of next cycle, so all ze had to do now was wait.

Ze felt excitement bubble up within zir spark, ze couldn't wait to hold her newspark.

After a few moments of waiting, Jukebox reentered zir quarters and handed zir Rung's schedule. As ze began to read through the schedule Rose began to feel more and more nervous.

Was ze ready? Was ze prepared?

As Rose finished reading, Jukebox stood there quietly and nervously awaited Rose's reaction. As ze glanced down at the schedule she saw many things. For instance, they did NOT provide any names. Rose stared for a moment, wondering which names to use. Ze was unsure. After thinking for a bit, she decided to go with... Skyslinger or Skyshredder.

Zir pink and white frame shakes, ze was scared. What if the newspark died?! Would that be zir fault?! What if ze gave away zir precious newspark? What if he or she never grew? That was a possibility. Rose shook the thought out of zir processor.

Ze was already exhausted from worrying.

Rose turned to Jukebox, "Is there anything else I need to know?" Rose inquired.

Jukebox hesitated.

"Oh come on, tell me Jukebox!" Rose whined, ze was becoming irritated at the silence.

"There's nothing else you need to worry about right now, besides I think you have enough on your plate." Jukebox responded, pointing at zir extended stomach. 

Rose sighed. "Yeah I guess you're right." Ze said, ze was still worried.

Jukebox smiled. "I'll bring in your lunch." He said with a small wink.

With that Jukebox walked off, Rose smiles and shakes zir helm, ze adores Jukebox. He will always take time out of his day to come and eat lunch with Rose. 

Rose laid there, listening to zir spark racing. She really hoped ze wouldn't miscarry the newspark. What if it wasn't a sparkling, what if it was just a defective offspring? Rose couldn't imagine life without zir newspark. 

Ze wanted to be a carrier...

But what if ze lost it? What if it was too late?

Ze was scared.

So, ze lays there, thinking for a while. Then zir thoughts turn to the book Ratchet had given zir, it said it would teach zir more about caring for a sparkling. 

Taking out the book, Rose starts to read the pages,  pausing occasionally when ze felt uncomfortable or confused over a part.  

Ze read the book for a while, then eventually a knock was heard at zir door. Ze turned to face the door. "Come in!" Rose said, ze then heard the door slowly open. 

"Hello, Rose! I brought back our lunches!" The minibot said, happily. Ze perks up and the minibot walks over to the desk and plops two bags of sandwiches and bowls full of chips onto zir counter. Rose sighs softly. All of these things weren't needed but ze appreciated the gesture.

Ze reaches for one bag. A red one with yellow stripes on it. ze opens it. 

"What's this for? You didn't need to buy me anything." Rose informed the minibot.

"Well you haven't eaten in almost 3 hours! I figured you deserved something sweet." 

Rose smiled, and looked at him. "Thanks I appreciate it." 

"No problem! So what's been up with you for these couple of past cycles." Jukebox asked, taking a bite from his own meal, Rose sighs and looked down. 

"I decided to see Ratchet after everyone suggesting I do... And..." Rose admits. 

"Please don't tell me your dying." Jukebox said dropping the food he was holding prior. 

"No, No, it's nothing like that! It's just... Um, how do I... Well..." Rose starts. 

"Please tell me slowly..." Jukebox said. 

"You remember when I gave you the "Hotspot" talk before?" Rose asked. 

Jukebox nodded, Rose was his adoptive carrier. Ze never hid the fact that he was adopted and ze told him about the fact he was left behind on an active hotspot back when ze noticed lights on cybertron. 

Ze ever since raised him. But what does that have to do...

"Now, as you're well aware, Cybertronians have hotspots as well in their sparks... They... Um, due to very specific methods they can fertilize this hotspot like a regular hotspot...." Rose said, flushed. 

It took Jukebox to process what he was being told, "I'm a big brother?!" He whisper shouts. 

Rose nodded. 

"And you thought of telling me now?" Jukebox asked again. 

Rose nods once more. 

"You should've told me sooner! I should've been the first to be told!" Jukebox pokes Rose, who yelped.

"You are! I haven't even told the sire yet!" Rose said. 

"What do you mean?" Jukebox asked. 

"...Its complicated..." Rose mumbles, messing with zir energon. 

"Whose the Sire?" Jukebox presses. 

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you." 

"Tell me."

Rose takes a deep breath. 

"Okay, well... Rung is." Rose finally admits while Jukebox spat out his drink. 

"He is?! Holy slag! I didn't think you had it in you!" Jukebox said. 

"Jukebox–" Rose starts. 

"The two of you were so close now I know why!" Jukebox said. 

"Jukebox–" Rose said again.

"And, to think Rung will be my father..." Jukebox said. 

"Jukebox–" Rose said again. 

Rewind popped in recording. "What seems to be the issue here?" Rewind asked. Rose yelped from the sudden intrusion. Seemingly unexpecting it. 

"It's nothing!" Rose quickly said. 

"It's just that Rose here is expecting a sparkling! With Rung!" Jukebox said, in the next room over in the conference room Ultra Magnus dropped a glass in shock.

"Jukebox! No one needs to know that!" Rose said. 

"Oops..." Jukebox said. 

"And Rewind," Rose said, capturing the attention of the minibot, "How much did you record this?" 

"Um, I don't know..." Rewind said. seemingly trying to avoid answering the question. 

"Rewind." Rose sternly said. 

"Okay, so I may have recorded it and its streamed to everyone in the conference room..." Rewind said. Rose's spark shattered. 

"Every...one?" Rose asked. 

Rewind nodded. "I'm pretty sure Rung isn't in there." Rewind said. Rose ignored that and went outside the room only for zir to run into Ultra Magnus. 

"Sire– I– I am so–" Rose began but Ultra Magnus pressed a servo on zir shoulder. 

"Go get him." Ultra Magnus said, Rose nodded and ran towards Rung's office, no further words needed to be exchanged as Rose knew Ultra Magnus was telling zir to go find Rung and tell him, and tell him ze will.