Chapter Text

The Prelude

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I, as the teller of this story, will narrate all of the players in this tale. A tale that could be told in either half-truths or half-lies, depending on your perspective. 

And I start with the lovers, perhaps doomed by circumstances or planted into the hearts, as a cunning thing—fate.

Kirinmaru, a daiyoukai with a soft heart, was betrothed to Sunako—a haughty bride arranged by his sister, Zero; a willful sister of the dark for an alliance with Kurayami—the god of the void that will never break.

Midoriko—powerful priestess of her lands—who swore never to have a man hold her beating heart—found herself in the gaze of a lover that saw her beyond her beauty.

Soon the rest of the players came to our fairytale to chart the course of the lovers: Sunako’s brother, Arata: a god, with his gaze, who glanced over his incompetent future brother-in-law; his father, Kurayami: solemn and yet watchful of every move; Mahiruma, a reluctant god who bound these lovers, though he knew that their fate can never be broken; the haughty Sunako, whose eyes dived to the pleasure of Kirinmaru’s beauty; and Kitsu, dubious of their relationship.

I could list more, but I must narrate my tale, of which I will tell another to open the story.

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Chapter Text

Chapter 1: How it begins.

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It is said that long ago, a young girl passed through the forest to see a lone stranger staring at the reflection of the pond, with hands grazing the water. His eyes, melancholic, and his lips, sweet.

The girl felt his loneliness in her tender heart as she stood by his side. “What can I do for you…” He only replied to her in kisses, and soon she found herself spirited away to a palace where no one could reach her.

And there they started their strange dance of passion and desire. 

And she thought she was loved by that stranger, when he touched her chest to feel her wild heartbeat.

That is…

Until the girl’s blood pooled on the floor, bathing the stranger’s feet, and her corpse became his doll, always swaying in eternity.

And eternity can be such a frightening thing.

And henceforth, our story ironically begins to see that death is indeed afraid of the girl. 

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Kitsu fiddled her ponytail, nudging at Midoriko, who stared at the ground, watching shoots bloom at her feet. “Geez…” Kitsu grumbled at Midoriko. “That obaa-chan’s tale is wild; don’t listen to her, alright…” 

Midoriko nodded at Kitsu.

“You will never see me getting married to any man…” 

Midoriko gave a cheeky grin to Kitsu, unphased by that tale. “Ever…am I right, Kitsu-chan…”

Kitsu shrugged her shoulders. “Well if you say so…Mii-chan.” She looked over the imposing mountain in the distance. “We should go back before the creepy monsters come and eat our hearts…” She repressed a shiver down her spine. “If the obaa-chan’s tale is true…”

///

20 years later

Kitsu giggled a little, making a small fire in the forest. “I will never forget about that crazy old miko telling us that story, and you solemnly swearing to me that you would never marry…” 

Meanwhile Midoriko did not listen to the teasing, and focused her reiki to calm her nerves after a long fight. 

“Are you still holding it…”

Midoriko pursed her lips a little.

“You do not need to reply to me, Mii-chan…” Kitsu grinned at Midoirko. “I pity you; all the boys like you, but like that old Yuki-Onna, you froze their hearts.”

Midoriko shrugged her shoulders a little, adjusting herself to the warmth of the fire. “I will never be ensnared by any man, not ever…if I must die alone, I will be happy…” 

Kitsu puffed her cheeks a little. “For a miko, your ambitions are lofty, but yes, I agree with you…men can be despicable…” However, a rush of energy came over Midoriko’s body, like electricity in her veins. She bit her tongue, searching for the source of that chaos. 

“Too bad, it seems I was enjoying this chat…” Kitsu picked up her heavy fans and medicinal powders from the ground. “Alright, we should at least have some heads on the ground. Chief will not be pleased if I keep chatting with you; this bastard can never stop pestering us…”

The wind seemed to howl louder than before, and they did not dare look at that mountain. “I notice you are shivering because of that mountain; still scared of that, just like a kid…” Midoriko forced herself to grin a little. It was a rarity for Midoriko these days; the only time she smiled was when she left her hometown to be trained as a miko.

“Perhaps…One can never be safe in this world…”

/////

Midoriko heard a cry from a village chief. “Miko-sama!” Kitsu gave a bemused grin to him, watching that hapless village chief grovel at her feet like a holy ambassador. 

“Old man..you know Midoriko-sama is not your moral centre…” Kitsu grinned cheekily. “Unless there is something important that you need to call her affections to…”

“There is…”

The village chief profusely bowed to Midoriko. “My daughter is gravely ill after she stepped upon a cursed field…please see her…” Midoriko could feel his energy screaming with hate.

“Sorry, Kitsu-chan.” She held her hand reluctantly. “I need to see about this situation…”

Calmly, they walked through the village to the chief’s home, where the energies clashed and went around the mountain. “May I ask for your daughter’s name, village chief…” 

“Oh! Hana, beautiful as the flowers…” Midoriko glanced over the sickly face of the girl, Hana. She looked over at Kitsu, while placing a warm palm on her chest. “Kitsu-chan! Do you have something to ease her pain…” 

Kitsu opened a compartment to remove a sachet of powder. “Yes, I got that…” Calmly, Kitsu forced open the girl’s jaw to pour the medicine. “Hey, I know this is shitty...but endure that…” 

Midoriko calmly swirled her hands to remove what miasma she could, with Kitsu holding the dear girl for life. However, she felt a sharp pain in her reiki. The girl could fight it. Midoriko gripped Kitsu’s hand tightly. “I think her aliment needs something, but I need to go alone…”

Midoriko looked over at the mountain; she had heard the rumours of that mountain, where once a great daiyoukai resided, who was supposed to make this item to please a dying wife. Perhaps it was the figament of tales told by mad servants or childish figurines. 

“Will you be alright?” Kitsu asked. “I could get someone to help…I can check if there are any tajiyas around the village.”

Midoriko held her hand so tightly. “Listen! I will be fine; no one will get me…” She tried to break her doubts with a nonchalant smile. “I do not think even the strongest taijiya could overcome that… I have dealt with worse, Kitsu, now I leave you with the girl…” Midoriko gave small rubs of comfort to the girl, who was heaving heavily with an illness so unusual.

“I need you to strip down,” Midoriko added to Kitsu, “because the girl is cold, and not even the fire can warm her.” Kitsu steelily glanced at Midoriko, but quickly stripped herself bare, revealing an ugly scar across her breast, and bruises around her legs. Kitsu wrapped herself around the other girl.

“Mii-chan, do you know what the problem is?”

Midoriko gave a sad smile. “An unusual illness that needs an unusual herb; pray for me for a safe return.”

Kitsu resignedly nodded to Midoriko. I hope you know what you are doing, Mii-chan.

//////

Kitsu watched Midoriko hold an air of confidence as she left the hut as Kitsu, still naked, constantly rubbed upon the sickly girl for cusps of warmth. “Hey…Hana, that’s your name, if I recall—” Kitsu murmured, combing the sweaty strands of Hana’s hair, watching her breathing grow heavier, and eyes writhe in agony. “Please hold on for a little longer…”

“I am not giving up on you…no matter what…”

Hana barely nodded at her words, and hearing her painful wheezes sank Kitsu’s heart.

Kitsu quickly took a satchel of medicinal power and poured it into her mouth. “My friend Midoriko is risking her life for you…let her efforts be not in vain…”  She took a deep breath, her fingers rubbing in small circles to soothe the girl. 

O gods, let Mii-chan be safe….

Kitsu could only stare at the cold moon bathing both souls, and hear the villager chief’s constant pacing for a kindly god to heal that girl.

////

Kirinmaru sat there in his garden, feeling the smoothness of the leaves, and breathing in their sweet aroma. 

His heart was bound to that garden, recalling how his father held the last flower before he collapsed on the floor with a serene smile, only to feel the coldness in the wind, and his eyes looked up to the sky. “Dearest brother…” a chilling voice came to Kirinmaru’s ears, “I wish you could stop daydreaming; it will do us no good…”

“It is nothing, sister…”

Zero patted Kirinmaru’s cheeks like a chubby baby. “I shall let you be; a man must be able to hold his thoughts for the carnage of blood. It is tragic that father went blind when he hid something so sweet…”

“I wish he would have given his affection to me, instead of to you,” Zero mockingly taunted Kirinmaru, yanking out the flowers from the garden and trampling them with her sandals. “A man must be able to hold wars, not wander in gardens…”

Kirinmaru forced himself to bite his lip. Big Sister is right. I am a coward. 

Zero gingerly picked up the crushed flowers on the ground and showered them over Kirinmaru, making a mockery out of that safe space. “My apologies… I shall be better…”

“Good…” Zero grinned at Kirinmaru. “Please keep that thought in mind… a guest is asking for you, as much as I can do.”

Kirinmaru shrugged his shoulders and walked away, feeling the anguish in his heart. His mother would weep at the sight of it; however, there was a field that neither Zero nor their clan knew, and he quickly took his claw to write the kanji “getaway” on his palm, at which he found himself spirited away to the outskirts of their garden. 

He found himself heaving a sigh of relief, staring at the bright sunlight that bathed his body. What was Zero’s plan this time?

Suddenly he felt a pang in his heart; that energy, that seemed new….

No one ever comes to this place, not even a soul, living or dead, let alone someone warm and fleeting.

One of the perils, Kyuuki, a lady with purple hair and blue markings on her face, nudged him. “What are you doing?”

“I felt someone…like…” Kirinmaru shut his eyes.

Like his mother.

“I am going to investigate…”

Kirinmaru spoke hurriedly to Kyuuki. “Tell my sister that I will be back.” He found his heart constantly racing as he walked through the corridors, barely glancing at the indifferent servants in their court, including a certain boisterous boar demon named Tokotsu, who was teaching Jakotsumaru how to greet the people in court, and Totetsu, who was snatching a freshly peeled apple from the kitchen.

That does not matter.

Zero must not know about that intruder, and who knows? Maybe Zero would have some respect for him.

Calmly Kirinmaru wrote a kanji in his hand 冥々, and his yoki was hidden in plain sight, away from the meddling court members and servants. His heart was at ease; for once, he was not invaded by the many thoughts of what he should and not do. 

He was free, even temporarily.

Alright, yes, that invader.

Kirinmaru found himself reaching his hands over the herbs, like his father when he grieved for his mother’s presence in their beautiful garden. “Kirinmaru, my boy,” his father said then, “I do not think I ever love again…but you…” His hand pressed on his chest. “You have that chance…even if I am gone— never lose that light—for a dark path can overwhelm, like it did to me…” 

His eyes glanced over to the shadow of a young lady, her lips bit in fury, her delicate hands bleeding from the thorns that surrounded the outskirts of the palace.

Kirinmaru wanted to write a word to attack the invader; however, he froze in fear. She did nothing, so maybe she would go away….

///////

Midoriko felt overwhelmed by the many bushes and trees on the outskirts of the palace.

Her eyes welled with tears as she searched for that mysterious plant, the one spoken of by legends, that a nymph dared to pluck the hairs of a sun goddess to heal her dying land.

Gods. 

It should be easy.

Focus.

Focus.

Hana needs me.

The reiki in Midoriko burned like a forest fire, never to be extinguished by human doubt or fear. 

The pulse of her reiki caled upon a field.

That is the herb…

A tender shoot with bright yellow and orange flowers caught her eye, which caused a shock in Kirinmaru’s yoki. 

Huh? Why has one so brave come to our gardens…she…

Her energy… Kirinmaru desperately fumbled the words, making himself fall back to the ground, hiding himself away from Midoriko’s sight. 

Act naturally.

Act naturally.

I would know if she is here for good or for evil.

Midoriko glanced over at a young man with red hair that was reminiscent of the dying embers in the fire. He was bunching his hands into the herbs, savouring their soothing aroma among his nostrils, staring at the sky languidly. 

He feels like a youkai, a very powerful one. 

I better stay away from him. 

Calmly, Midoriko closed her eyes, and sat herself in a quiet corner of the garden.

Alright.

Think.

Think.

Thankfully, Midoriko knew a dance from her youth taught to her by an old miko in her training, during which she swayed her arms back and forth, allowing her spirit to grow stems and leaves to bathe her body. For she was no longer a human girl running childishly in the fields, but a powerful force to be reckoned with, by both humans and demons alike.

Her energy changed to something inhuman, and yet so holy. She found herself laughing at that dance, after which she plucked a leaf and made it a Shikigami.

Soon, it trailed after her: a glowing path in that field where she simply danced, and danced away without any care.

Midoriko felt so free. 

Free to change one’s destiny: that of the girl who needed me, more than anyone in this world.

Kirinmaru glanced over at that phantom of a girl running over the fields and plucking the herb, barely looking over him.

She looked human: a young lady with flowing black hair and a marking of a star in her forehead.

And yet, she was not, like a fertile goddess mingling in human flesh in sight, doing her strange dance to bless the fields, allowing her to camouflage herself from every attacking force, plucking the herbs from the field.

Her footsteps bloomed death and life with every step.

And then, she disappeared, to his disappointment, for his eyes were endeavoured to that sight forever.Midoriko found herself grinning at that herb, taking a leaf from the nearby tree. Midoriko disappeared into shimmering light.

A cold voice came in again. “Kirinmaru… I heard from Kyuuki that there is an invader in our palace. Did you catch that person?”

“No…” Kirinmaru forced himself to lie to his sister. “It is all a dream; it is just a shimmering projection…”

Was that human, a shimmering projection of his mother, or was he dreaming? 

Zero laughed coldly at Kirinmaru’s naive words. “You are reading too much; gods and goddess of this nature will always hunt us…however, there may be one on my side. The one who I set you to marry is eager to meet you…” Zero calmly dug her fingers into his red hair, hair that was famed by their lovelorn father. “We cannot have a daiyoukai whose clothes are caked with dirt, engaged to his future spouse. You are no longer a child who hungers for his mother’s milk.”  Zero touched his forehead, feeling his warmness in his body, and his eyes gazed wistfully at the barren field.

“Why the hell are you gazing at the outskirts? There is nothing but illusions in the field…” 

Zero curled her lip to Kirinmaru’s melancholic gaze. “You know we could be famed for creating illusions, and you should not be the one deluded by your fickle imaginations; that is a human’s purpose if you are wondering, dearest brother…”

Kirinmaru forced himself to speak up to Zero. “What if I told you that I saw a goddess dancing in our fields? Would you believe that we look so favourably in her eyes?” He forced his knees to push up his weight on the ground. “And for that moment, I wish I could believe in her..”

“There is no one to believe, Kirinmaru…” Zero grinned coldly at her brother. “Gods and goddesses will crumble, and we have ourselves to survive amidst the impossible wars…” Zero gripped his hand tightly, digging him out of his imagination.

“You need to dress up well, and show the side that made your father proud.”

Kirinmaru nodded to himself resignedfully. “Yes, sister…” He wondered if that strange goddess was actually a figment of his imagination.

As they entered the palace, Zero was greeted by one of the servants dressed in grey, bowing to her. “Welcome back, Lady Zero…” 

Zero gave Kirinmaru an affectionate hug, whispering a dark secret into his ear. “Kirinmaru, please freshen up, because a tardy appearance will cause much gossip to our already-disgraced state…” Zero smiled at him. “It would ease my heart to see you happily engaged…when I could be the one married…” Kirinmaru nodded submissively to Zero.

One of her advisors—Konton—bowed to he.- “Lady Zero, you have finally found the elusive Kirinmaru…” 

Zero grinned cruelly at Konton. “I know; Lady Kyuuki seemed to bark about this matter the whole day. It seemed that my father’s romanticism worsened to his already-broken spirit…I wonder what Kurayami-sama would think that the son of Koushirou-sama would be so docile, just like a maiden…”

“You did well, Lady Zero…”

Konton bowed to her. “He did not know that he and his children would be the players of our little show…especially Sunako, so willful…”

“Yes.” Zero grinned a little. “We will see about Sunako…is she comfortable in the room, along with her father, Konton?”

“Oh yes, she is so charming, playing her biwa to entertain us…” Konton watched the flurry of Kurayami’s servants, pacing up and down with lavish gifts fit for a household. “I hope she can win over Kirinmaru…” Zero glanced at the outskirts of their palace, watching the barrier shimmer amidst the heat. There was no way a strange goddess would come to their lands, it was a play on Kirinmaru’s nerves. 

“I hope so, too…”

////

Kirinmaru barely glanced at the sokutai laid on the bed, instead transfixed by the barren field in the outskirts where that ‘goddess’ danced. It felt like forever since he encountered such a transient moment when he saw his mother cradling the flowers in her special garden, thinking of a life that she did not have previously, where she could finally breathe amidst her mysterious ‘illness.’ 

I wonder where that goddess came from?

Before long, an indifferent male servant bowed to Kirinmaru. “You took long, Master Kirinmaru… we must not delay…” 

Kirinmaru forced himself to blink away that thought, and forced himself to take deep breaths in his chest. “Yes…” He sheepishly took that heavy silk layer to his chest. “I am…ready…”

No dreaming of strange goddesses, but instead, I would be engaged to one.

////

Kirinmaru found it impossible to walk with these sandals, his head sweaty in fear of his future consort.

What will she be like? 

Will I have to hide myself? 

What should I do to please everyone?

Zero giggled girlishy at a gaunt older man wearing a black sokutai, playing a game of Go, which she obviously had won, if anything was to be told by her gleeful claps, and another young lady dressed in white silks to contrast her silken black hair, void of colour, expect for her red lips curling in joy at that handsome young man. However, her brown eyes hungrily glanced at her prey while playing a melancholic tune in the distance. 

The gaunt older man grinned at the younger lady. “Oh…it must be Kirinmaru…” He bowed to him with awe, which Kirinmaru followed suit. “If you can recall, I am Kurayami, a friend of your father,  Koushirou-sama, the crimson beast king, for you did have his famous red hair—hair that could consume enemies from afar with a single strike blessed by the forces….” Kurayami pinched the fat between his eyes. “But instead, he became a dog without bite, such a shame…”

“However, forgive me about my past grievances, Kirinmaru-sama…” Kurayami shrugged his shoulders, coaxing the young lady out of her playing. “I am happy you are engaged to my dearest Sunako; Zero promised her that you will be a wonderful husband to her…” That young lady—Sunako—smiled at him demurely; however, her eyes were cold to his warm gaze.

“Treat her well…” Kurayami cleared the phlegm in his throat. “She is a delicate thing….after all, she has a great responsibility to bear the child that will unite both families…”

Sunako giggled at the statement that stoic Kurayami spoke, bowing to her father’s words. “Very well, I shall leave you both alone…” He walked over to proceed with his game, as Zero sat down to his level. Sunako gave a wink to her father, leaning her head onto Kirinmaru’s strong shoulders

////

“Isn’t she such a lovely thing…” 

Zero grinned at Kurayami. “Yes, Kurayami-sama, you have seen that my brother needs guidance…” she said, placing a piece on the board. “Since my father in his grief, he cannot help my hapless brother. He can only dwindle at his gardens…and Sunako seems to be a perfect fit…” 

“True…” Kurayami shrugged his shoulders. “However, I wish to be alive at the wedding and not to watch that weak cub of yours…” He found himself coughing over and over again over the aura, staining the pieces of white to go with his blood.

“Goddammit…why does this happen to me…” Kurayami sighed to himself. “I would make that visit short…my health has been poor, thanks to these damn humans praying to the good gods…including an irritating love god…” Zero rolled her eyes at his complaining.

“However, I am an old god, and sometimes we can take our divinity to our shoulders; and other times, he must leave it to his children…”

Zero blinked a little. “Should you take my brother under your wing until they wed…”

“No…” Kurayami grinned to himself, wiping the blood from his mouth. “His yoki is muddled and would tarnish my health; however, I have an idea…” 

Another guest?

Kurayami finally reached the final bloodied go piece and knocked Zero’s black piece off the table. “My son, Arata…will teach your brother how a man should behave, not dwindling in the gardens.” He chuckled at Zero’s chewing of her bottom lip. “He is married right now to a daughter of a creation Minakanushi, Ayako…pretty thing, but deadly…and he has served her well, bearing many, many strong children….which I hope will be the rightful duty for my dearest Sunako…”

“I think he can hold your miasma better than I…” Kurayami glanced at Zero’s bewildered expression. “I think it is time for my daughter and I to go…” Zero kindly lifted Kurayami’s bony hands up. “I cannot stay there for long…that miasma makes me ill.”

///

“May…I bring you…to the gardens…” Kirinmaru swallowed his words, strolling to a small path smelling the flowers in the air, “Sunako-sama…” Sunako rolled her eyes when she entered the vast garden where the birds chirped and the sun seemed to shine. “I am to be your engaged wife, not an associate, Ki-Ki…”

Kirinmaru shrugged at that nickname, allowing Sunako to trace his chest, aroused by the pumping. “And, my dearest, you are indeed prettier than what the old lady told me…” She gently patted his cheeks. “A beauty! Oh, I wish to consume you with my love and corrupt you…” 

“D…Do…as you will…” Kirinmaru was forced to swallow his fear by holding her shoulders firmly. “I…”

A gravelly voice echoed in her ears.

“Sunako, dearest daughter…” 

Sunako puffed her cheeks, pulling away from his grip, bowing to Kurayami. “It is time we should go,” her father said. “We should allow Kirinmaru to come to our place sometime…”

“It is a pity, Ki-Ki; I wish to know you more, love…” Sunako gave a flirtatious goodbye wave to Kirinmaru. “Wish me sweet dreams and happiness for what is to come…” 

Kirinmaru heaved a sigh of relief, leaning himself against the tree, relishing the clear air away from Sunako’s miasma, upon which he saw a very disappointed Zero, tearing the flowers away. 

“Brother, brother of mine…” Zero felt the bile rise in her throat. “You should be less submissive, allow yourself to court Sunako, not allow her to consume you….” 

“But..I…I…”

“You are going to land with the same fate as our father, to die of a broken heart and wander in the derelict gardens…” Quickly, Zero pushed him out of that garden, and using her staff, she formed a web around the garden, and, snapping her fingers, she burnt the garden into flames, detached from Kirinmaru’s internal screaming of a paradise lost. “I do not want you to suffer that…”

Kirinmaru found himself forced to bite his tongue to watch that scene. “Now for some formalities, dearest brother,” Zero continued, “Sunako can only come once in a while to our place; however, Kurayami-sama will bring Arata-sama to teach you the ways in which a man should have his prowess…” She indifferently looked over the ash that swirled around the once beautiful garden. “Please welcome your future brother-in-law with warmth and tact…”

Kirinmaru found himself nodding in grief for a paradise now crumbled into ash. “Yes…sister…”

////

Sunako found herself pouting at the distance as she continuously painted her lips up and down, allowing the rouge to sink into her teeth. “Kirinmaru, or Ki-Ki, Arata-ani…I liked him…” She constantly stabbed the brush up and down, allowing the pigment to run over it, only to see a-gray clad man with a boyish face: Arata. “He is fun…a good heart which could be easily manipulated into the darkness…a rarity to his kind…”

Arata grinned at Sunako. “Would he be interesting to fill your power…” he asked, allowing himself to take one of her robes and drape it over his shoulders. “Or to hold his heart as an accessory for your beauty…”

“I do not know…his heart would be impossible to beautify me.” Sunako crossed her legs prettily. “I have an idea: remember that irritating girl that became a god in his eyes, Midoriko? Let’s test his valour to me….”

“What is your idea…” 

Arata grinned at Sunako’s cold smile, forcing himself to sit on his bed, seeing her write a poem to her consort. 

///////

A few days later.

The announcement of the engagement weighed Kirinmaru’s heart, shuddering at the sight of the willful Sunako toying with her chest, forcing himself to wake up from his wonderful dream of a goddess dancing on the outskirts. 

What is she to me, that a daiyoukai like myself could become consumed with her?

A cheeky voice echoed in his ears. “A very good morning to you…”

Arata gave a bow to Kirinmaru, making an annoying tongue pop to awaken the drowsy Kirinmaru. “Anikii-ue-sama…you should have welcomed me with great hospitality…” Kirinmaru reluctantly bowed to him in his underclothes. “You look so cute! When you look miserable, I hear it’s because your sister did something you hated.” Quietly, he snapped his fingers to allow a fresh bunch of flowers to decorate the room. Kirinmaru watched the petals forming pools of blood on the table.

“Smile please, for I expect that, as a brother, this is not how you treat my sister…” Arata snapped his fingers, enchanted those who dared to observe their conversation, placing his hands onto Kirinmaru’s shoulders. Kirinmaru dared not reply back to him, letting Arata pinch his cheeks to a painful smile.

“Since you are mute…I shall teach you to speak…” 

Arata made a tongue pop, swirling his hands to make a garden being burnt into the ground, which caused Kirinmaru to shiver. “As you see, by the custom of the gods, whoever we marry must give a dowry—and usually, it is settled by the bride’s parents and siblings, which would be me, since my father cannot come to this land…” Slowly, he formed a shape of young miko doing her dance in the shrine. “There is one that blocked us gods of the void, a young man who was born with extraordinary powers and resilience…”

“You can say she is simply a god in human flesh, and that her dance will curse our power…and Sunako’s, too.” Arata quickly squashed the formations of the young girl dancing in the fields. “Rumours are spoken that she did the impossible by stealing an herb from the outskirts of the palace…because a soft demon let go of his prey…. ”

Huh?

That goddess is a human?

No, it cannot be?

Arata was grinning coldly at Sunako. “But impossible…” Kirinmaru protested to Arata. “No human can penetrate our forces…we…” 

Arata gave a playful wink on it, plucking the petal out of the flower and landing it on Kirinmaru’s hand, forming the kanji of that name searing into his palm. “That is the name you need to look for…simply descend to her lands, make her love you.”

His eyes squinted at that name.

Midoriko…

What is she to me?

“Corrupt her purity and tear that woman’s heart out…” Arata mocked Kirinmaru. “Let my sister consume her heart, and she will love you…”

Kirinmaru shook his head.

 “No…if this human does not harm me, why must I murder her senselessly?”

“Looking at the bare fields, neither making them grow nor touching the flowers will save you.” Arata shrugged his shoulders, forcing the name of Midoriko to make Kirinmaru silently scream in agony, watching him heave in pain.  “You are a powerful daiyoukai who has opportunities to cause fear among humans, and yet you neglected it.”

I cannot... 

I cannot…

Kirinmaru used his claw to write a kanji to repel the pain, forcing Arata to move out from the space. 

“Oh, too bad…Sunako has high hopes for you…” Arata giggled at him being pushed around to the corner of the room, amused by the blood dripping down the drawer. “If you want to be a man, you must do the impossible; no wonder your sister is ashamed of you.” He calmly placed a letter on the table, allowing the blood to smear on the paper. “Weak as a newborn…”

Arata slowly feeling Kirinmaru’s yoki fading with that word manipulation, puffing his cheeks indifferently. “You can only use words to get that situation in control, that is what your father taught you..” Arata used the tips of his fingers to slowly repress his yoki. “Words do not change the tide of battle…”

“Only actions did Aniki…”

Arata gave a wave goodbye to Kirinmaru, watching him hold his breath from that spell. “I leave you to your thoughts…my sister Sunako left you something, do read it once your yoki comes back; it is only for a few hours….”

Before long, the shadow was gone, and the faint light came in. Kirinmaru found himself weeping when he reached for that letter, seeing the pools of blood dried out, leaving an ugly stain on his drawers as he reached for Sunako’s letter.

Dearest.

Apologies for the abrupt introduction, but we should figure ourselves out before our blissful wedding night.

Do not ever touch the roses, for your yoki will be trapped by it. Only a kami can touch them and be unharmed. Take these flowers, as the beginning of our engagement, because I will be cradling your head into my lap.

///

Sunako rolled her eyes and pouted her lips wistfully, allowing the rogue to smudge to her teeth, to see Arata panting to himself.  “Aniki, did I scare my future husband?” she asked, calmly giving her brother a small bowl of seaweed soup to replenish his lost energy.

“Not really, he should be scared…” Arata chuckled to himself. “For a youkai he is soft and I hate that…no wonder Zero took us straight away. He is a coward.”

“Did he get our terms…” Sunako proceeded to sit beside him, eating her bowl of soup. “He should at least know what we wanted, especially if I played the role well, as a demure bride…” She gazed over the slimy strands of seaweed, making her teeth cling onto bits of it.

Arata blinked at that sight, using the robe to clean her mouth, allowing parts of the rouge to be smudged to her lovely face. “Shall we start the show?” Sunako grinned coldly, allowing her brother to munch on the seaweed.

“It has started, my sister…” Arata bowed down to Sunako. “Not even father knows that we plan to bring our glories back…”

/////

Kirinmaru found his thoughts plagued by Arata’s mockery and Sunako’s words: what are they to me.

How could I live up to these expectations ?

No, I cannot.

I will be a disappointment.

I am always.

However, a shimmering phantom came to Kirinmaru’s mind: a beautiful young lady dancing in the fields, taking the precious herb from the fields and disappearing into the warm sunlight. Quickly, he took one of his father’s old green robes, draping it on his body, unaware of the chatter by his sister with another daiyoukai from another clan. His arms moved gracefully in a straight line, to bend back to a clap.

Kirinmaru started to stand tall, with his knees straight and knees splayed; quietly, he made that hop in the spot, thinking—forcing—to spread his legs.

Shit, was this difficult for my strange goddess?

Kirinmaru made these steps, swaying to the breeze, avoiding the weight of breaking his position, making swirls around the corners of the room with imaginary music in his mind, until he found his body heavy from squatting for a long period of time.

And yet, when she moved, she became something different.

Kirinmaru danced himself to exhaustion, and for that moment, he forgot about the engagement, and about Sunako and Arata’s mockery.

Please, whoever are you, may I be endeavoured to your fate….

///

Kitsu forced herself to stay awake while combing through Hana’s locks to keep her warm. A mumble came across Hana’s lips. “Big sister…”

“Huh?” Kitsu wedged herself against Hana to rub her naked body onto the girl’s shivering hands. “…Kitsu-chan would do…”

“I am not that old…”

Hana spoke wearily to Kitsu. “I felt cold until I met a goddess; her heart was pure and she danced in front of me.” She wheezed again in pain. “Was I dreaming…”

Kitsu shrugged her shoulders. “Hana, I always believe that making gods out of imagination will not do us favours, but…just this once…”

“I believe you.”

Hana sheepishly nodded to Kitsu. “That the gods could be kind and care about our affairs.” And, as if aptly, Midoriko came in, smelling so sweet and her reiki giving out a calming glow to Hana.

“God, you indeed bring me out from the dark.”

Midoriko shook her head. “No I did not. I am an ordinary human who wanted to do the right thing…” Kitsu found her stomach growling from staying in that pose.

“Thank the gods you came back…” Kitsu found her body numb from the constant sitting, forcefully stretching her muscles. “Did you get what you wanted?” She quickly took her suit and slipped it back on.

Midoriko nodded quietly, passing an empty container to Kitsu. “Yes, can you get me some water from the nearby stream….then you can rest, Kitsu-chan…”

—

Kitsu raised her hand gleefully. “Alright, Miko-sama…as you wish…” She barely looked over at Midoriko holding Hana tightly, whispering to her calmly, rubbing her chest to soothe her wheezing. 

“Thanks, Kitsu-chan.”

If there is a gleaming ray of hope in such a barbarous world, it would be Midoriko, and no man shall conquer her.

////

Hana blearily looked over Midoriko, with her eyes gazing gently to her, wiping her sweat off with a clean rag. “God…” she muttered to Midoriko, gripping her hand tightly. “Is this the end for me…”

Midoriko shook her head. “No…you still have a will to live…” Calmly, she moved Hana onto the futon; hearing her wheeze broke her heart. “And what matters is that no one will ensnare you; that is the beauty about us, humans…” She made a fire in the shallow ground. “And Hana, never let anyone take that power away from you…”

“Mii-chan!!” Kitsu heaved a little, placing the container on the edge of the door. “For the girl…” She pulled the bicep of her left arm, feeling the ache from holding Hana down. “Time for me to go to the springs; do your best to save her..”

“I will…get some rest, Kitsu-chan. You have been of great help.”

Kitsu gave a wink to Midoriko, giving a sigh of relief. “You fought for the girl long and hard; just make sure that she lives…”

Calmly, Midoriko took the herb that she stole from the faraway mountain, placing its petals into the water, watching them flow and swirl, with the sound of Hana heaving back and forth in agony. Her mind lingered upon the handsome stranger, who was staring at the skies. There was this innate sadness in him, but she shook her head, watching the herb melt into a golden liquid. 

Why did he look at me with such sad eyes? Usually youkais of his kind would easily claw me into shreds, but this one froze at my gaze.

Like I became an image of something beautiful.

No, he would be dead under my touch.

Quietly, she tossed some ginger slices to ease her nausea.

The aroma was otherworldly, lingering a soft smell of home. A home from which she departed long ago.

“God…I…” Hana rasped painfully, coughing at every sentence. “Where am I?”

Midoriko shook her head. “No I am just a priestess, Midoriko…” She poured the liquid into a small chipped cup for Hana. “Drink this, it will make you feel better.” Hana wearily took that cup, drinking the liquid—her lungs finally soothed from the painful constrictions.

Finally, Hana drifted off to sleep, holding her hand tightly. Kitsu came in, with hair strands slick from dipping in water. “That girl seems better; to hear her wheeze stings my heart.” The colour of Hana’s face was coming back slowly after that long illness; Kitsu would never forget that face ever again.

“I hope so, too; this herb…I never knew that legends could be real…” Midoriko lovingly gazed at Hana, who was calmly breathing in her sleep. “I am probably the only crazy priestess who would enter an unholy land…”

Kitsu laughed to herself, grabbing a cloth to rub her hair. “You do what you need to, friend, but remember you are a girl and you have needs…” Kitsu wiped her weapon with a small rag, munching dried fish in her mouth. “Let your hair down and have a drink with me; I will get my friends to get you the best sake…”

“You are too kind, Kitsu-chan…” Midoriko nodded calmly; she found herself drifting herself to sleep. “But I will politely decline; I think we should stay around the hut for a while.

“…I am going to do a purification ritual for the hut, should there be something….”

Kitsu grinned calmly at her, watching her friend heave some breaths of relief.  “And I think, having some backup will help…” She found herself falling asleep after a long evening, with only the lingering smell of the herb that Midoriko took away from the strange mountain perfumed the small hut.

Kitsu thought to herself, Mii-chan I pity you. You are simply thrust upon a cruel world, and yet you execute your duties so well. Make time for yourself, friend. 

I hope. 

////

Kirinmaru woke up with a throbbing headache and his gaze into the glaring sunlight. 

A serene voice spoke to him.

“Kirinmaru…” 

Kirinmaru scrunched his eyebrows to see a gray-haired lady—Zero—sitting on his side. “You are no longer a child; you cannot simply snatch father’s robes and pretend you are the emperor.” She grabbed Kirinmaru’s robes and tossed them to the ground. 

“Clean up; we have matters to discuss in the drawing room…”

Kirinmaru nodded to himself, gazing at the once-flourishing field fading away to barrenness. Not even his attempted dance could revive it.

Reluctantly, he changed into a different set of clothes, something dull and boring. He entered the dining hall, where they were served bowls of congee with mini dishes. Zero seemed to adapt that notion well.

“It seems you need time away, Kirinmaru, brother…I found a letter from Sunako, and it seems that brief meeting did not suffice…” 

Kirinmaru rolled his lip a little, forcing himself not to smile at that aspect. “It is settled that from tonight onwards, you will stay with Kurayami’s palace…”  Zero placed the pickled lettuce piece into her mouth. “It would be better for his health, and plus you will get to know Sunako. She is such a charming woman. I love her…” 

“Without that stupid garden hindering you, maybe you will be a great man like Arata…which reminds me…” Zero passed him a small bottle of round capsules. “We need to improve on your virility, Kirinmaru; after all, Sunako is eager for a man to show his performance not only in the bedchambers…but also, romantically, lavish her…” Zero’s eyes widened with awe. “Oh, another thing in mind…”

She then passed him small pots of liquids, one being blood red and another black. “She always makes herself beautiful for you, I think she would like these, say this as a token of love from your sister…”

“And do not ever return to these damned gardens; they will be forever gone, like your childhood…the child has died in these gardens; you must be able to love Sunako…no matter what…”

“I said I want to say; you may proceed to eat brother..” And the room fell into a deep silence, smelling the ash from the burnt gardens. 

For no conversation was exchanged, except what was to come.

//////

Calmly, Kirinmaru walked over to the outskirts of the palace, with the servants carrying the chests of treasures for Sunako and Arata. He laid his head low, barely looking at the barren field. 

And soon, he disappeared, like a shadow drifting amidst the clouds.

He could only move his arms up and down to imaginary music. Imaginary music to lull him to a different world, a world kinder to his gentle spirit.

/////

A gentle man’s smooth hand pushing forward to his mother, barely touching the leaves in the garden. “Kirinmaru…” His voice seems so melodious in comparison to the voice of another lady in court. “Listen to me; I will be off to meet a suitor, and I leave you to watch over her…” There is a sadness in his smile, watching the green-haired lady hide her tears away.

“You will be a greater man than all of those I command…” He clenches his hand into fist; Kirinmaru does the same, and their knuckles barely graze each other. “I promise that your marriage will never affect my love for your mother.” 

////

Kirinmaru stood outside of the palace:, the sky was dark and the trees swirled into sinuous paths. It seemed impossible to see the light amidst the thick fog, but yet, an old lady approached him. 

“You must be Master Kirinmaru.” A creaky voice scratched his ears. “My mistress Sunako and master Arata call you…” Her bony hand gripped the supple flesh of Kirinmaru.

“We hope for your stay to be comfortable…”

Quietly, the old lady disappeared into the dark. “They have anticipated you…”

Kirinmaru heaved deep breaths as he paced into the palace, its walls black, parchment paintings of the family staring coldly at him. A the trail of incense led to a small scene of a young man reading scrolls, and an older lady with fading chartreuse hair, her belly full with child, wearing grey robes and pouring a cup of strong wine to Arata, who combed her locks lovingly.

He stood up, hands clapping to the air to allow the fellow inhabitants to pause their actions. “Our guest has arrived…” Arata quickly bowed to him, before embracing him tightly. He patted Kirinmaru’s cheeks like a chubby baby.

“You came aptly; we are about to make a feast for your arrival…” 

Arata gave a boyish chuckle to Kirinmaru’s silence. “About your dearest love Sunako; she will be here in a bit. This is my wife Ayako, and my son Eito.”

Sunako came in wearing a figure-hugging dress, with her breasts nearly spilling out. “It has been a while…” Sunako sat herself comfortably alongside Ayako, though her gaze was cold. “Ki-ki.”

Kirinmaru swallowed quietly at that sight, eager for the food to come in, like stewed chicken, eggplant with minced pork, stir-fried vegetables lavished with the finest of stocks, cloudy soups on hold, and tantalising cakes. Sunako pursed her lips delicately, chomping the grains of rice. 

“Why so glum…”

Kirinmaru bite his tongue. “I am just tired…” He took his pair of chopsticks, munching the food. “It is a long journey from home.” Kirinmaru smiled sheepishly, watching the juices of the meat stain Sunako’s mouth. 

“True true true…” Arata shrugged his shoulders indifferently. “I agree, Anii-ue-San… Sunako, give the man a breather…”

Sunako puffed her cheeks in frustration

“After all, he will soon settle himself comfortably…”

—

Kirinmaru forced himself to curl up in bed, with one of the indifferent servants bowing to him. “Good night, Master Kirinmaru…”

He swallowed his fear. “Good night…” Staring at the ceiling, he swayed his arms up and down to imaginary music of the goddess in the field, only to be interrupted by the moans and sighs of another. Kirinmaru rubbed his hair, peeking through the thin crack of the wall, to find the pregnant Ayako’s mouth aghast in ecstasy and Arata, grinning at that sight, squeezing her swollen breasts.

And, by their gazes, carnality mingled in the air.

Kirinmaru found himself shivering in horror at such a scene like that. One of the servants calmly mumbled to him, passing him a small cup of tea. “The wife act is simply a persona. Master, there was once a guest like you long ago who found that secret, like you…Ayako is the name of his former dead wife—and that lady is Chōdayū, a mistress who was given another chance at life…” He calmly closed the door. “It is best to disclose this truth to yourself…Master…they are fighting hard to hold a reputation…”

Kirinmaru gulped at that revelation, forcing himself to savour the bitter taste of tea with the sounds of playful giggles and mewls that ordained his night.

////

The next morning, Kirinmaru woke up, glaring at the brief sun rays in the castle window to see Sunako sitting at the side, holding a sake cup in her hand, with a trail of blood trickling from her mouth. She sucked her index finger playfully, savouring the strange liquid in her mouth. “You are indeed beautiful…Ki-Ki…”

Her examination of Kirinmaru’s shocked expression made her shiver in anticipation: his soft lips were so kissable and his green eyes could melt the hearts of many mortal women. “If it wasn’t for your form, you would make a pretty god…” Another voice came, and it was Arata dressed so handsomely in his grey outfit. “A pretty god…” he echoed, pushing his sister aside.

“I think your colour is pale…” Arata grumbled a little, giving a mocking bow to his brother-in-law. “I apologise if last night’s actions caused some disturbance…I think it would be good, Aniki, to get to know my sister better; after all, you are bound to her, even in death…” 

“Did your sister ride horses with you in your youth…” Arata continued, questioning him.

Not as I recall, Kirinmaru thought, recalling his eyes peering against the door of the garden, his father swallowing his dissatisfaction to meet a lady draped in grey veils; her purple eyes met his. And, his father pressing his lips to her indifferently, allowing the veiled lady to chew his lip a little.

“That settles it, since you cannot speak, Aniki….” Arata grinned cheerfully, clasping his hands together. “Fresh air would do us good…especially Sunako.” Sunako bowed down to her brother.

“Yes, I agree…”

Kirinmaru shrugged his shoulders. “I would gladly accept that, Arata-sama….”

Arata gave a reassuring rub of his shoulders. “Very good, Aniki…” he said, and stepped back to allow Kirinmaru to get dressed for the day.

He must put on that show beautifully for the haughty siblings.

/////

“What a pretty god…” Sunako crooned to Kirinmaru, watching Arata take the horses from his hands, their eyes glowing red and their hooves digging the ground. “To ride alongside with him…is heavenly…” However, Kirinmaru did not reply, faking a smile at Sunako’s words.

Sunako smiled. “Smile, my beloved…one must not pout…” She patted his cheeks back and forth as she swung her legs unto the spectral horse at her side. “It would make an ugly look for you, oh my dear drunken god of slaughter…”

Kirinmaru shrugged his shoulders. “Yes…” He continued to fake his smile as he got up on the horse, looking at the twisting trees that entered their way. The horses slowly trodded the dark pathways, where spectral animals danced their strange dance and the fireflies blinked erratically at his gaze. 

“Ignore these animals, Kirinmaru…” Sunako found herself grinning so cruelly at Kirinmaru’s trembling. “They are but little pawns for my father to hold…which reminds me of something…” She pulled the mane of the horse, allowing it to stop, and Kirinmaru followed suit.

“About that dowry: it is usually set by the male members of the family, of which…father is not well…so my brother came up with a proposition: that a beating heart would be sufficient, but not just anyone per se…

“A priestess by the name of Midoriko, wretched bitch….

“Which,” Sunako grinned coldly at Kirinmaru, “it should be easy for you, since you are a youkai…you should bring fear and terror to the humans…” She pressed her lips to him, savouring the sweetness in his lips. “Which I have to make you, of course, do the act, because you have little regard for human feelings: love, compassion, forgiveness…” She led him to a dark corner, where she twisted the piece of the dead log to make a drink, consuming it devilishly. “Humans are easy tools to bring about suffering: you have to figure which one to choose to make them bleed…”

Kirinmaru glanced at Sunako fearfully. “Which is…” He clutched his hand on the bark of the dead log. “That priestess, she did nothing wrong, and I should not meddle with affairs like that…” 

Sunako puffed her cheeks in frustration. “And that is the thing: I consume suffering…I can transfigure them to strengthen my power…” Sunako transformed that dead log to the dead ground, allowing the insects to crawl about Kirinmaru’s body. “However, that bitch is hindering our powers, bringing joy and life, which makes me sick…

“Since us gods, those of the void, disgraced and rejected by humans, expect one or two humans who hunger for our powers…” Sunako shrugged her shoulders indifferently, taking the decaying wood and fashioning it into a small figure before twisting it to different shards. “We are left to our devices, Ki-Ki…which…” Her slender fingers touched his chest, feeling his racing heart. “You just fit perfectly in the picture…a daiyoukai with the blood of your father running in your veins should find this task a breeze…” Calmly, she kissed him again, chewing his lip, and feeling the blood on her tongue.

“After all, if one cannot delivered what I wish, he would be a failure and be in exile, or perhaps…” Sunako thrilled her words playfully.  "Or perhaps a capable husband, who can help me bear strong children, like Arata and his wife, Ayako, can do..." 

Kirinmaru shivered at that thought, but he pondered for a minute. A failure and be exiled: that sounds like heaven to me.

“Fine, I will accept that offer…” Kirinmaru quickly grabbed Sunako’s hands. “I will take the heart of the priestess…” His gaze, firm to her affections, made Sunako’s knees weak with glee. “So you will be pleased…”

Sunako forced herself not to giggle girlishly at his firm words.

“My…wife…” 

Sunako snapped her fingers, bringing the horses to their side. “That settles the matter, Ki-Ki…” She allowed herself to play the role of the damsel, allowing his hands to lift her up to the horse. “We should tell my brother the happy news…”

Kirinmaru found his heart sinking about the deal, climbing the horse and allowing it to trod on its way. “Yes, such happy news…” The sky cast a heavy shadow onto him, unaware that the spectral animals died in their path.

An escape rope around my neck to pull me through away from this hell, to lie to my future wife. That is what I would do.

////

Sunako came into the drawing room, taking small steps at the time, her heart light over the good news, unaware of her brother Arata was chatting with their sickly father, Kurayami-sama, about family matters. 

“Sunako, my dearest wife.” His heart is heavy, and his mind clouded with that darkness. Perhaps she took his yoki and drink all of his blood, for he wished to lay in bed and dream. 

Sunako gently caresses her cheek. “Why is my greatest love pouts…”, she playfully give him a kiss in the mouth. 

“Smile, otherwise I will look bad.”

There is no reason to smile, no ballads to be written on that day.  He forced himself to give a huff, and a pained smile, shuffling his feet to a corner, allowing Sunako a figament of happiness. “A figment which Kirinmaru can never reached, that he is simply a round piece in the game of go, tossed over by many people.

“Aniki!!!!” Sunako giggled at Arata, after which he gave her a small hug. “I have the most wonderful news…” Arata noticed the glow in Sunako, and was delighted by it. She gingerly whispered into his ear, eyes widened with bemusement.

“Aniki-Ue-Sama is taking the conditions of your dowry…” 

Arata quickly knelt to the ground, and bowed to Kirinmaru. “You indeed gave my sister the biggest honour known to all gods and men.” Sunako also bowed to Kirinmaru calmly, unaware that her red lips made a haughty grin. “Your sister Zero will be pleased with a gift so lofty…”

Kirinmaru grew determined to leave that damn place and tell the truth about the killing.

“However, you cannot simply get away tomorrow. You are no longer treated like a servant here, but as one of us—a valued family member…” Arata’s pregnant mistress came in, her lips soft to kiss Arata. “We shall move you to a view which an immortal would be proud of…”

Kirinmaru bowed back to him. “A kind honour, for a future brother-in-arms, to think kindly of my future…I will do as I must…” Arata, however, did not hear that lofty statement of Kirinmaru and summoned his servants.

“Shall we give him something lovely to wear, and his favourite food to eat…” 

Sunako leaned her head upon Kirinmaru’s shoulder. “I have a very special wedding night planned for you." She snaked her hand around to squeeze his ass. “A man like you will do well in such a task….”  

/////

Resigned, Kirinmaru stayed at the palace of the void gods for one more night to please dear Sunako, for making a deal to hold the still beating heart of the priestess Midoriko.

Arata’s son Eito, unaware of his parents’ actions, was playing a horrifying tune in the middle of the night with his shamisen, and thought that they would talk civilly over the matters of rule.

I should be trying very hard to please her, as her future consort, but I cannot help but wonder who was that strange goddess who danced in the fields.

The morning after seemed gentler, though tiresome, with activities made to accommodate the siblings’ strange schedule, whether it was for Arata to practice his archery (at which Kirinmaru was hopeless at aiming at the right target, and only applauded by his members of court), Sunako making the silks for her new wares as a future bride, or endless talks with lesser gods, who congratulated them on the prosperous marriage.

And the evening came, without the moon shimmering its beams; Kirinmaru watched Sunako delicately biting the meat, while glaring at him hungrily. And Arata made light conversation with his heavily pregnant mistress Ayako about his day’s agenda.

Sunako spoke to Kirinmaru calmly. “You know, it is a pity that I cannot hold you for long…” She took herself to chew the buns freshly steamed from the kitchen. “You are too beautiful for your own good, but your speaking is slow…Ki-Ki…” Kirinmaru munched the dumpling in his mouth.

“Yes…I need to…”

Arata swung his hand on his shoulder. “Dear Sunako, dear sister….Aniki needs to have his mind clear for such an arduous task…” He gave a cold grin to him. “You do not want to be disappointed, am I right…”

Sunako chewed her bottom lip impatiently. “He needs to report to Sister Zero on what he is going to do…”

Yes. The beating heart of a priestess.

You do not need to remind me…

////

The next morning, the air seemed crisp as Kirinmaru made his descent down the stairs, holding Sunako’s hand tightly. He feared what was to come. He needed to tell the truth.

For Sunako, it was simply one step closer to corrupting his pure heart. 

“Farewell, my greatest love…” Sunako simpered darkly, kissing Kirinmaru’s soft lips with the rouge staining his mouth, before moving over to his cheek. “Farewell…” She had to force herself to hide her giggles to see his sad gaze, for a troubled heart made a strong source to gain her power.

“We shall see each other again…”

Strangely, relief and joy came into Kirinmaru’s heart as he sat himself in the paladin, for he was no longer ensnared by Arata and Sunako’s company, though he might have been accompanied by another.

///

The mummers of Kyuuki and Konton about a plant being stolen had bothered Zero’s mind. 

Why did a human?

No, a strange goddess? 

How did that thing come into my lands, and take what it would?

I will execute it and display its head at the palace grounds for all to fear.

However, her thoughts were stopped when a beautiful palanquin landed on the grounds, and she saw Kirinmaru dressed in the loveliest of black silks and shoes to match. Zero could not help but to give a hug to her brother, with her toes tip-toeing to reach to his height. 

“So, how did it go….” 

Kirinmaru took small breaths to ease his nervousness. “I am afraid of what I will execute…” Zero hid her malicious smile by holding her breath, giving smooth rubs into his soft hair. “I must take the heart of a powerful priestess, Midoriko….”

The heart of a priestess….

What an unusual request.

“For who…dearest brother…” Zero simpered in a motherly manner. “This is strange…”

“Arata asked me…as the part of the dowry…” Kirinmaru forced himself not to weep at that thought. “A beating heart of a human priestess; it is supposed to nourish Sunako’s body in order for her to bear children…”

Zero tapped the fan at the corner of her mouth. Oh, how interesting. A god grovelled so lowly for a youkai for a task, that sounds fun…

It should shake my brother’s senses.

Zero grinned at him. “How wonderful…” she said, allowing that space for Kirinmaru to hold his composure, watching the servants bow to him. “But first, we must prepare for the human world; there could be holy people and tajiyas that want your head, brother…” She allowed him to sit at the table in the drawing room. “Your yoki is too weak because of your emotions and father’s coddling over you…” She felt the weak pulses in his body. “We must unleash the beast within…”

Zero chewed her lip fondly, observing Kirinmaru staring at the mother-of-pearl scenery of a pastoral scene of a couple playing games on the table. “A beast that danced among the bodies of his enemies…dearest brother…” She giggled at his side, allowing him to shuffle his body comfortably. 

“Settle your thoughts…”

Kirinmaru watched Zero burning incense around the room, allowing the aroma of sandalwood to permeate the room. “Father was a legendary beast king, wrathful in power; his enemies of his foes became his armour, and you are simply the runt of the litter—a son of a beast king meddling through gardens like a maiden…”

“And your heart must be clear on the task…” She disappeared into the kitchen, unaware that Kirinmaru’s yoki was slowly fading with the suffering in his heart. “No gardens nor goddesses will linger in your heart…”

The medicinal aroma from the kitchen perfumed the drawing room and made his stomach churn heavily on that thought, with Zero carrying the lacquerware cup in her hands, passing it to Kirinmaru. “For a heart beating, father would relish your bloodlust….” 

Kirinmaru slowly gulped that liquid, cringing at the taste of the strange herbs in his mouth. He found a slight warmth in his belly, at which he quickly pinched the fat of his palm, to repress the wildness in his veins.

“...Is…it…done…sister…”

Zero smiled a little. “This elixir will take some time to unleash its properties on you…” She tapped her fan onto her mouth. “If I were you, and needed to unleash the ‘beast’—you can go back to these wretched gardens…” She faded into the darkness of the drawing room, with a malicious smile at the side.

“After all, what is destroyed…can be decimated forever…”

Kirinmaru found his heart quickening, that he found himself running, running, running to that lost sanctuary. He ripped off the web that blocked the passage between him and the destroyed garden, fighting off the heat that burned in his body.

He hated that sensation that ran through his veins; he wished to vomit the contents of the drink inside, and yet he felt a certain numbness in his body, inhabiting that desire of being loved and forgetting his suffering.

Forget what Sunako said, her poisoned words in his mind.

Forget Zero playing the role of the king in his life.

Forget about the sweet goddess that danced in the fields entrancing his mind forever.

Kirinmaru found himself hungering to tear off the beautiful plants that ensnared that damned land, and until his calloused hands touched the bark of the tree, feeling a gentle pulse to soothe that madness.

My sweet boy. A wobbly voice echoed in his ears. My sweet sweet boy…

She always sat there so sadly by that tree, holding Kirinmaru tightly, letting the tears stain upon her faded dress. Why do you weep?

Would you forgive me if I had to kill you, to end your suffering?

I have forgiven you, the moment you were born, my child — for I live to see you smile, Kirinmaru.

Even if…Even if.

He laid down quietly, with the faded flowers around his body and hands clammy from the maddening ritual.

Mother, please forgive me; I believe father is a much braver creature than I.

The ritual is complete.

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A/N: Hello there!! Thank you all for reading the prelude and the first chapter of this new project! I admit I am surprised how much I am in love with this pairing that I just want to write it, which I go with that journey with you.

I would say it is the fusion of my two previous fics which I loved: You go whenever you go and To enchanted lands and beyond, as I would say it is me coming out of the creative darkness into the light, to bring a much lighter side to you. 

So how it began is simply a chat with my fellow rafter, and my Midoriko serial, on our Midoriko x Kirinmaru ship of dreams, and what we wanted; and we talked about a field where she took the herb, and it comes with my brain being like what is that stake. 

And that stake becomes that story, which Kirinmaru has to take the heart of Midoriko which she is like ok Snow White vibes, and it bled to that idea, that he is trapped in a marriage with Sunako (I hope you liked her, as boy she is crazy 😂). It is funny that I did Riku in YGWYG which he goes through a journey for his character but instead, I infused Kirinmaru into that coming of age story itself- which I liked it more than Riku (and that is me doing it for a past year), with that aim to show him that voice which is very similar to me (god I infused a lot of myself in him).

Midoriko was a bit of a challenge, as we have little to work on, which I have to give credit to Serial for doing a little colder, which she too, goes on a journey to defy all gender expectations as a whole and I really enjoy that tightness between Kitsu and Midoriko which to some extent, is my wish fulfilment on my end on the female friendships.

My favourite scene: Doing that dance scene, when Midoriko gets the herb! Originally it was supposed to be her using a projection to get a herb however that dance is my favourite and I loop so much of Dream Girl Evil by Florence + The Machine to do that scene, as it is pretty much her theme song which she fought all gender expectations- and I thought it will be so beautiful to see her doing that, and did not think of being loved at all (this is her arc, to embrace positive femininity which is to let her guard down, and not bogged down to the fantasies), and that dance motif ripples in the first 3 chapters, to show that freedom (and I blame myself for listening to Dance Fever on loop), amidst the madness. 

As of now it is like 50k right now which is so crazy and I never wrote as big as this story, within 2-3 months and boy I cannot wait for you to experience this fairytale as much as I do. 

You are so welcome to leave comments here as I would love to know what are your thoughts! 

Do note that I am pretty slow as I am gonna try to work on the schedule of my beta reader for what is to come, and we will roll with it.

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Chapter Text

Chapter 2: The pressure and the panic you push your body through

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Kirinmaru woke up, touching the bark of the tree where his mother would sit on lonely evenings, imagining that sweet kiss between his gentle father and his kind mother, before his father departed to places of war, or the calm conversations with another wife who he took, to keep up with appearances with strange gods, lowly youkais, and defiant daiyoukai leaders. 

And that last kiss was calm.

The elixir settled in Kirinmaru’s veins, with only fear propelling his heart. “I bid you good morning, brother…”  Zero sat down on the burnt paths of the derelict garden. “Quite a mess you made, big brother…” She playfully put on the veil, concealing her face. 

“But I would say I am very impressed…” 

Zero quickly plucked the burnt leaf from the nearby bushes, crumbling it to ash. “Let’s hope this thing will last forever, so you can get the beating heart of the priestess…” She drew a small curve from the ash on top of his forehead, before disappearing into the human world.

“What you seek, the beating heart of a human…brother, dance at the barrows of your enemies, like father long ago…”

////

Kirinmaru woke up with flowers surrounding his long hair, quickly brushing off the bright white flowers that were stuck in his hair, watching them wither on the ground. Staring at his hands, calloused from the attack moments, he was assaulted by the sound of people chattering, which caused him to shiver.

Mother…

Kirinmaru took a breath.

His heartbeat slowed to the task that was to come. 

I am not afraid. I will make Father proud.

Kirinmaru forced himself to get up from the flower field to walk over the bustling village, assaulted by the sounds of humankind, from merchants selling the latest wares to potential customers, to a chubby baby staring at that unusual red hair, to young ladies in their simplest yukatas glaring at that strange creature before making their way for daily activities, to an older man with a distinctive scar who glared at him.

“Oi! Young man….” He rubbed the calloused fingers onto his chin. “You seem new…”

Kirinmaru forced himself to slump his shoulders, giving a sheepish smile to his cranky expression. “Yes, I travelled far; do you happen to know a priestess…”

“A priestess…”

The older man spat at him. “Anyone can look for these pretty things…” Kirinmaru did not speak against the old man’s insults. “What are you, a budding kannushi ? These perverted asses, trying to be gods to satisfy their desire for virgin flesh….” 

“Never mind…never heard of one…” 

Kirinmaru heaved a sigh of relief over that matter. Good. if I can keep up with this charade for long, so no one would find me. “Well…Thank you…” He found his stomach growling from the quick descent, though fear came to his mind.

He tried to say goodbye to the older man, but he, like the other passerby's, had become invisible at sight, though talks about his unusual hair and eye colour became the centre of topic in this village.

One of the older ladies carrying a toddler on her chest, gossiped with another lady, preventing him from touching the toddler, who was staring at him curiously. “You know…that village was cursed by something evil—a young girl there was healed miraculously by a miko…”

“Yes…Midoriko-sama; she is powerful, did the impossible…apparently snuck into youkai country to get an impossible herb.”

“How brave, we ordinary women would be meat to these hungry youkai…”

“I pity Midoriko-sama; why did she not marry, such a beautiful thing…”

Kirinmaru felt his heart sink for the ‘Midoriko’ person; she seemed like a strong person. She should have ended her suffering now. Why wander to these comments?

A merchant glanced at Kirinmaru, and his outfit seemed to be brighter than most of the inhabitants of the human lands, wearing an embroidered coat of cranes at flight. “Heh! You looked unusual; I assume you are not from this village…”

“I am seeking a priestess…”

“For what young man…anyone seeks one…” The merchant chuckled to him, passing him a stick of dango. “Sit and I will tell you how to find a priestess…” Kirinmaru sheepishly nodded to his hospitality.

He seems nice.

////

“Young man…” 

The merchant gave Kirinmaru a small onigiri ball stuffed with strange bits which he could not comprehend the shape of. “You are not of this world; how interesting…”

His measly human face and gait changed into a creature with a violet complexion, and the silks he wore looked even more elaborate than his human persona, with the golden threads that shimmered in the hot sun. “I knew someone with flaming hair, any day… there is a beast king, perhaps one too many in the lands—Koushirou, a fierce man in battle, with a face of a maiden, and yet his teeth filled with blood…” He calmly passed Kirinmaru a small, chipped cup. “Rumours have spoken in that land that all of the creatures are charmed by his beauty, that they will die in war for him, and that he is known for his virility….”

Kirinmaru twisted his lips a little. “And I think he looks like you…” the merchant added, unaware of Kirinmaru quickly drinking another cup of that strange liquid.

“You said something about the priestess; why her? You wanted to kidnap her to be your bride to bear you strong children?”

Kirinmaru shook his head. 

“Alright, I must not pry into the heart of a man; private affairs are private affairs, after all…Forgive me, young man, I am just simply a humble merchant making my way across the lands.”

Kirinmaru munched the dango stick, watching the sun’s ray hit him on the front, enjoying that moment of bliss. “However, if you feel the sun hitting your front, young man…” The merchant finished gulping that cup of strange liquid. “A priestess could be near, cleansing the lands from such evils…” 

“Ohh… how would I get that priestess…I mean, she should be afraid of me?” Kirinmaru frowned a little. “Like all humans fear youkai, no matter what…”

“You are naive to the human world; you just need to switch on the charm, because a beautiful face like yours will make a woman’s heart melt. Whisper sweet poetry into her ear; use your animalistic lust to squeeze every curve. And surely, she will be in your possession…”

The merchant gave a cold grin to Kirinmaru, savouring that last piece of the dumpling. “She would be under your spell, and you can do as you please—like your father of old..”

No, my father is not a lustful person. His heart is open and kind, even to the smallest of creatures.

“Oh…” The merchant squinted at the bright ray of light at the distance; that could not be an ordinary source from anywhere.  “You better hurry, young man; I think she will make her next move…keep my….”

However, Kirinmaru did not listen to the words of the merchant and instead shook his hand, not hearing his advice. He took the onigiri ball, though, to sustain him through his travels. 

“Thank you for the meal!”

“Well, you are welcome!!” The merchant quickly tossed a small paper doll onto his back, watching it melt onto his shirt.

The merchant mumbled under his breath, noticing how Kirinmaru’s red locks shimmered dully in the sun. Just be careful, beneath their holy robes, they are actually hungry wolves . He quickly walked to a quiet corner of the road, making a portal to be transported to the dark woods of the void gods’ palace.

“Sunako-hime-sama…”

The raven-haired woman dressed in a lovely pewter dress, Sunako grinned at the merchant. “Yes…” She took a small paper doll and tore it to little bits, resulting in her complexion getting brighter from the torn bits of paper.

“The cards have been placed; your husband will soon receive the heart from the damned priestess.”

Sunako gave a cold grin. “Good work…” She watched the merchant run away to the darkness. 

I wonder what Ki-ki’s suffering tastes like? Sunako thought to herself, imagining how wretched his moans would be, should she place her mouth onto, his, well, nether regions per se, if she wanted to play the demure bride for Kirinmaru.

For it would be music to my ears.

No, I want to see if he is able to fulfill my task.

/////////

With the blessings of the land, Hana’s health recovered quickly, which eased both of the girls’ hearts. The village headsman gave a bemused smile to the girls. “I was sceptical with you, miko-sama, but…” He watched Hana gleefully bowing to both of them. “I thought that the gods had blessed us, in the form of you…a heavenly servant…” 

Midoriko barely cracked a smile at the headsman. “I am not that…I am just a priestess looking out for the hearts of people, like Hana…”She stood at the foot of the hut, observing the sky to hit a certain angle.

Calmly, Midoriko took some papers written with Hana’s name and stuck them onto the exterior of the hut, watching the characters glow softly in the sunlight. 

“Kitsu-chan….” Midoriko called to her friend, who was polishing her fans to remove the dirt from their previous exorcisms. “The herb…”

“Oh, the herb…”

Quietly, Kitsu looked over the dried leaves and flowers of the herb, its fragrance fading over its dwelling of the human world. But it was a gift worth holding.

“Oi!” Kitsu shouted at the top of her lungs. “I got this…” Calmly, Midoriko hugged Kitsu in her arms, taking one of the branches to permeate the hut with a herbal aroma.

“Are you going to complete the ritual? Then, we will seek out a village for handsome boys…” Midoriko did not respond to Kitsu’s teasing. “After all…” However, Midoriko’s expression spoke otherwise, as she was determined to clear the hut of such evils. Watching Midoriko clap her hands back and forth, made Kitsu’s heart serene for Midoriko. 

How can she be content with such a life of solitude?

“That is the last of the herbs I have stolen…” Midoriko lamented to Kitsu, seeing the colour of the bright flowers fading to ash. “Things do not last forever? I am glad not to be immortal…” Calmly, she swung her arms, moving her index finger up in a quiet prayer.

“Deter what is evil…” 

The pulses of her reiki transformed into a flock of sparrows, flying around the hut, clearing what was evil, and Midoriko deferred every shockwave of evil. “Go…”

The sparrows’ powers grew bigger as they flew to the corners of the room, cleansing every evil force that penetrated the room.

Kirinmaru found himself walking to the forest, to the pulses of the hut, when he felt a deep shock wave in his body. He found his stomach twisting and turning over the purity in the air.

The little paper doll dissolved away from Kirinmaru’s body, morphing into small flowers in the wind.

Kirinmaru glared at his claws turning into blunt nails and his body growing heavy from the pure energy that radiated in the forest.

He felt soothed by that presence, falling into a deep sleep.

The same energy when he grew exhausted from helping his mother in the gardens. And breathing into that faint aroma of the gardens here.

Oh mother, did I fail to become the predator?

//////

“Father….”

Koushirou barely looked at Kirinmaru. His hands emptied of a warm embrace, as he mindlessly wandered the same pathways over and over again, watching the fading leaves of their makeshift garden dance in the wind. 

“My son…” Koushioru gave a small smile to Kirinmaru, wiping away the dirt from his face. “It seems that I died with your mother long ago. I am the beast whose fangs are blunted by my sweet goddess of mine…”

Kirinmaru puffed his cheeks angrily. “No, you are not; you are always brave and kind…” Koushirou gave a rueful chuckle to Kirinmaru, allowing him to take the flowers and weave it around his head. “You sound like your mother, but be wary, my son; there are others who would not take so kindly to you…”

Be wary?

Father.

I was never….in fact I fear the….

/////

Kirinmaru found himself waking up in the patch of the forest, bleary from that sudden change in the air, for he looked upon the pond to see himself differently— with the same green eyes and his hair black as night. He started to scratch himself, but instead of claws, he inherited blunt nails caked with blood.

He noticed the group of strangers walking by, one being a funeral procession, in which a young child held white flowers in her hands, watching the monks chant to the deceased. Another was a young mother revealing her breast to soothe her wailing child, and yet another, an exhausted mercenary taking up that sword, staring at the scorching sun.

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU STARING AT???”

“Sorry???”

Kirinmaru quickly ran off from the mercenary’s gaze, and bumped into a lady in priestess clothing, watching her friend Kitsu making a deal with a sleazy merchant, sighing about the little coin that they received for information around this area. “Oh! Are you a priestess?” The woman’s brown eyes narrowed at Kirinmaru, who was still clinging to the hem of her robe. “I am…so glad…to…” 

Soon Kirinmaru drifted off to sleep, breathing in her sweet aroma. That sweet goddess who danced in my field: is this you? He heard her heartbeat; it was warm and so kind like the gardens he loved long ago, and died within him.

“Mii-chan…Mii-chan…” Kitsu shouted at the top of her lungs. “I…think…” 

“What the hell???”

Midoriko forced herself to carry Kirinmaru on his shoulders, while he grinned at her sheepishly. “Should we find a nearby village, because I think a man just fainted on the roadside…”

Kitsu narrowed her eyes on that beautiful thing. Sheesh, is it the duty of a miko helping the weak…

“Shit, that man….” Kitsu grumbled to herself. “He feels as if he will never eat again; maybe his stomach is filled with worms…” Midoriko did not reply to Kitsu’s sass; she simply brushed his long wavy hair aside to reveal a lovely face. 

Parted lips.

A strong jawline.

Melancholic eyes.

Midoriko felt pained by such beauty; however, she shook her head, considering these thoughts impure in her mind.

Kitsu spoke harshly to Midoriko. “Handsome fellow; why does he want you?”

Midoriko curled her lip a little. “Like all who are sick or dying, a healing hand from a miko brought them an ounce of heaven through the many hells that they have to endure…” Calmly, they both walked over to the village, where chatter filled the air, and the people bowed to Midoriko’s presence.

All of these words became bubbles of oblivion to him.

///////

“Mother….” Kirinmaru ran over to the garden, only to see his mother trying to make the flower bloom, and failing. 

She hid her sadness with a serene smile.

A silvery voice echoed in his ears. “Kirinmaru…I am happy to see you…” She gently allowed him to sit on her lap. “I hope you and Lady Zero did not fight…” Kirinmaru shrugged his shoulders and leaned upon her chest, allowing her delicate fingers to card through his red hair. “Your father wished that you would get along with her…”

Kirinmaru plucked the dying flower and placed it in her hair. “I wish so, too, but she seems unhappy that father is weak…”

“That is her perspective….but he is strong in your eyes and in mine…” She allowed him to prune away the withering flowers in the garden. “He gave up his life for you and for me…treasure that bravery…”

A word slowly floated in his mind.

Midoriko-sama, Kitsu-sama, I hope this room will be comfortable for you.

Midoriko-sama.

Midoriko.

That is the name of the priestess, huh?

Her name sounds so soothing.

Like the green fields.

Like how mother would dwell there, despite her sadness.

////

Kirinmaru found his stomach growling from collapsing on the floor; gingerly, he took a ball of onigiri, munching it ravenously at the sight. He found his senses dulled as he expected to smell the faint aroma of that ‘Midoriko’ who came in, that aroma of pine that comforted his weary soul, as he stared at the beauty intently.

She smelt awful, with the blood of the youkais that lingered her body.

Kirinmaru wanted to vomit at that aroma, but he held it in, glancing at another girl, one with taut muscles, Kitsu—settling herself comfortably in the corner, counting the money from the bounty.

Midoriko took away his piece of onigiri, pointing the arrow to his hand. “That onigiri is ours to eat, not yours….” 

Kirinmaru puffed his cheeks a little. “Sorry…I am hungry…from…my travels…”

“That is some stupid excuse you made, huh?” Midoriko hissed to Kirinmaru. “You seem to hunt for me; why, perhaps?” Calmly, she pressed her hand onto the ground, making Kirinmaru fall flat on his face. “Like, who are you?”

Shit…

Think, think, think.

“Well, I am Nishi….” Kirinmaru entreatingly stared at Midoriko. “I came from a province far away…because….I heard about your powers. As you see, my family sent me over to…” 

Midoriko shook her head in disdain. “Please rest and then leave…Nishi…” Midoriko calmly took off the bloodied armour, seeing a plain kosode underneath, underneath which he could glance at her curves. He quickly shut his eyes, curling himself into a ball, trying to diverge himself away from her. “It would be best if you do not meet me…”

Kitsu heaved a little. “That Nishi is very talkative…what is up with him…and finding you…” She narrowed her eyes. “We should someday get you a man who will treasure your space…is there anything I can do to help…”

Midoriko heaved a little. “Can you watch that idiot…I just…” Glancing over at Kirinmaru pouting away in the room, turning his head away from her. “I need to rest…

Kitsu nodded to her. “I got you Midoriko; go and purify yourself, or your rituals…I can handle men like this; those with dopey eyes make me sick…” She gave a wave goodbye to her. Midoriko did not say a word, but simply walked away from the hut. Kitsu bit her nail between her teeth, watching Kirinmaru take small breaths before falling asleep again from exhaustion and pity.

What does an idiot like Nishi want with my friend?

“Luckily, you are not like the rumoured son of the dead beast king…” Kitsu grumbled to herself. “Midoriko would have placed a purifying arrow onto your chest, and left you for dead…”

Kiirnmaru found himself smiling at those words.

This is that Midoriko.

I feared her and yet I loved her.

/////

Kirinmaru could hear the footsteps of Midoriko coming in, holding a basket of herbs in her hand and pieces of cloth. She still had that lingering aroma of the youkais she slew in her body, alongside the freshness of soap. 

Stay still.

Midoriko mumbled under her breath, forcing herself to avert his piercing green eyes, allowing a pool of energy to surround his heaving chest. Kirinmaru felt soothed by her reiki, closing his eyes into a deep sleep. 

Kitsu glared at Kirinmaru’s constant waking up and sleeping. “I have a weird feeling about him, like him knowing you without a hello seems weird. It seems that the rumours of you being unattainable are like good food for hungry lords and demons…” Kitsu swung a fan to his throat. “If you want, I can end his suffering…” 

Midioriko shook her head, withholding her wrists. “I told him to leave, and if he is a man of honour, he will leave, after he rests…”

Kitsu sighed to herself. “You are too soft, Mii-chan…” Kitsu let go of her ponytail to reveal her long locks, wiping the caked blood from her face with a small rag. “Too soft, for my own good, and for yours…”

Midoriko took the fan, and did a dance for Kitsu. “No, I am not. I will never be conquered or quelled; I will be, just me…my friend…” Kitsu laughed to herself, watching Midoriko smirking when she did a masculine bow to her. “I will be free…”

“As always, be….” 

Kitsu watched Midoriko gently pant from her dance, unaware that Kirinmaru, in his lucidity, overheard their conversation, trying to distinguish the two ladies, the muscular one being Kitsu—judging by her coarseness, in the daiyoukai world, she would be placed as a lowly commoner—and ‘Midoriko’.

Midoriko.

She seems so pure and so…

So…

Never mind.

Kirinmaru wanted to touch the ends of her hair, but his body grew weary from his yoki screaming loudly. 

“Switch on your charm, that woman will fall on her knees…” Calmly, he took some breaths, allowing Midoriko’s reiki to swirl into his body, feeling its sweet warmth.

“That is why I can rely on you, Mii-chan…” Kitsu grabbed that basket of herbs, mashing it quickly with a mortar and pestle. “I got a bit of a hiccup…remember that sleazy merchant that I had to bargain with for information?”

“Oh, what about him?”

There was something calming about Midoriko’s voice and energy that set his heart at ease.

“Well one of my friends, you know, Takahashi-kun, that one who wanted to marry you but I barred him from seeing you because, you know what happened…”

“There is a rumour of a prince that is unwell since his last hunt in the forest, and us tajiyas…cannot handle this shit because, well, folks are dying in that region…and the clouds are dark, blanketed with miasma…”

“And what happened to him….”

“You know that idiot is struck by an illness which even the chief cannot cure…” Kitsu sighed to herself. “And I think I would need you, because I trust you in my life more than anyone…”

“Oh…about that thing; did he give you any information…”

“I do not know; it made a scary bird noise like a hyoo…hyoo…”

“So I am guessing you need a holy priestess to help you with that, Kitsu-chan…” Midoriko smiled calmly at her. “To solve the source of the illness, that I can do…shall we rest, and leave that man alone in the hut with the money to pay for his stay…”

“You could say that…shit, I do not know how to solve that…”

Maybe that Midoriko needs my help? A human like that would face death and I would not get her beating heart. 

Kirinmaru frowned a little, forcing himself to get up from lying down on the floor for a long period of time. “Excuse me…Midoriko….Kitsu…” Kirinmaru spoke blearily to them. “I think I could help; I read this phenomenon somewhere…where was it…”

Kitsu held her knife, placing the blade at his throat, allowing a streak of blood to stain his shirt. “I think you have extended your stay too long…what is your claim, Nishi, that you know this…”

“I…heard about the Nues, omens of misfortune and illnesses; one can recognize them by the hyooing sound….” Kirinmaru huffed his cheeks a little. “I…know…” 

Kitsu gave a sheepish smile to Kirinmaru. “One moment…” She raised an eyebrow. “Mii-chan…” Kitsu hid the blade unto her suit, whispering into Midoriko’s ear. “What the hell is he talking about, picking up on your reiki with his so-called knowledge of the Nue…what if he decided, after that he would plant his seed into you…” 

Midoriko swatted Kitsu’s hand and instead pulled an arrow to his throat.

“Let me speak to him, I am supposed to heal that stranger…” Midoriko gritted her teeth, grabbing one of the arrows, pointing the metal part to his throat. “Not you, Kitsu-chan.” Midoriko barked at Kitsu, giving an exasperated sigh to her.

“Fine…fine…let me get some information about that creature…” Kitsu grabbed the fans from the floor. “Take care of yourself and the man; he looks like some drunken beggar on the roads who wants your child…”

“Oh, I will..” 

Kirinmaru gulped at the sight of these two ladies. He could feel his heart racing at Midoriko’s malicious expression. “Stay safe, Kitsu-chan…” she said.

Kirinmaru placed his head down in shame, chewing his lip nervously over Midoriko. “What do you want from me, Nishi?” Midoriko asked him. “You said you have information about what we wanted? First of all, I do not believe you…” 

Kirinmaru scratched his head. She seems to lay down her guard now.

Right.

She is a priestess.

She has the right to suspect me. 

She is so cold, like the wandering Yuki-onna, would my heart be cold for her? 

“Unless you have a reason to…” Kirinmaru pretended to faint in the lap of Midoriko, calmly breathing into her scent. “Shit, the weather has been awful…” Kirinmaru muttered under his breath, and Midoriko could feel his energy screaming wildly back and forth. “I hate it…”

Midoriko sighed. Seems I have to heal him more , Midoriko thought to herself, feeling his head burning like a consuming flame. “Do not worry.” Midoriko puffed her cheeks, forcing herself to get a clean rag for Kirinmaru’s burning forehead. “If you could stay still, and not wriggle…” Midoriko growled at the sight of that handsome figure staring at her innocently. Doubts plagued her mind as she quickly picked up a nearby bucket to get some cool water from a nearby river.

 For such a beautiful face, he is hopeless and would fit in the robes of nobility.

 If so, I could ask him to leave.

His sweet face haunted her mind like a Yurei. Midoriko vented her frustration onto a tree, her reiki splitting the branches. She covered her mouth with her hand. Oh shit, if the kami of the tree finds me, I will be dead. Quickly, she muttered a prayer, walking towards a gentle stream of water. Quietly, the ground grew little plant shoots; Midoriko swatted the roots in frustration over that face. Maybe if she has a chance, she would enchant the water with a binding spell so he could not make a move on her. After all, if he dies, what is the job of a priestess: to kill someone without remorse or compassion?

Midoriko scooped the water from the stream, watching the reflection of the trees break into small pieces. She sheepishly dipped the rag in the warm water, transferring her reiki into cloth.

Hope it breaks his fever.

Makes him less feral.

Then he can leave me forever, despite his claims.

Little did Midoriko know that the clouds in the sky grew darker; she ran over the large puddles of rain, ignoring the sight of travelling merchants and monks making their way with their straw cloaks amidst the cool sky.

///////

Kirinmaru looked over the small gap of the rattan door, bothered by the sound of the cicadas screaming, focusing his sights on a mother holding a child to her breast, before falling asleep to the sound of a child suckling and cooing to that sight

I could tell her what I know about the creature, but it may mean nothing to her.

His mind wandered to that ‘Midoriko’ bouncing the child happily, and kissing its sweet face. And Kirinmaru holding her hand so tightly.

That would break her walls down. 

Could her weakness be that she desires to have children?

No, that would be foolish. I would be no better than the rumours of my father…

Why do I think like a daiyoukai, hungering for an heir? 

Calmly, a figment came in, curling her lip in disdain. “I am back…” Kirinmaru barely looked at the shimmering water droplets in her rag. In his bleariness, he could smell something sweet in her. 

Like a wandering forest.

I need her to love me…

But how…

I want to love her….yet I fear her.

That aroma made his heart so still.

“Midoriko-sama, your heart is so kind; should you not bound yourself in holiness…” Kirinmaru heaved a little. “You will bring happiness to your future husband and your children…” He reached his hand to her shoulders, and onto her heaving chest. “It is a pity that you, with strong hips to bear children and breasts to nourish…” Midoriko found herself fuming such that she cast a projection at him, causing him to knock off, and his face bruised.

Midoriko observed Kirinmaru scrunching up his face regretfully.

Well, he seems calmed down from that force field.

Quickly, Midoriko dabbed the rag back and forth, turning away from his face.

She hated Nishi’s stupid handsome face.

And that said face mumbled into her ear, “Oh…what am I saying…” Blood pooled on his tongue. “Sorry, I am just transfixed by your beauty, and if it pains you, I would pluck my eyes off to never see your face…” He quietly curled up into a ball, hiding away from Midoriko’s frowning. A small blush crept on her face.

“I do not come out that much, Midoriko-sama; my guardian Kouta-sama must have guided me wrongly to my lustful thoughts…” Kirinmaru covered his face, forcing himself to glance at her. “I think I should have mediated with the corpses for saying that…”

“Never mind…”

Somehow that projection shook up Kirinmaru’s senses, giving him a boyish smile. “About that….Midoriko-sama….”

“Drop that term…” 

Kirinmaru found himself shivering at the sight of Midoriko, pouting in the corner. “Yes…Midoriko…” he replied, forcing himself to not say that term over and over again. “That person that the prince affected could be a creature named the ‘nue’.”

“Never heard of that thing…” Midoriko grumbled to Kirinmaru, giving a pleading expression. “For a peasant like you, how do you know that…”

“According to the text I read in the archives, it could be formed by a mere thought of vengeance, and if humans cross with one, it could result in death; no one could survive one…well, except me…”

How unusual…

“Nishi…” Midoriko shrugged her shoulders. “I assume that you encountered that ‘Nue,’ despite the fact that you could die…” She constantly dabbed the rag until it was soaked with Kirinmaru’s blood.

“My parents were killed by one, according to Kouta-sama. They happened to be around in the province for a hunt, where one of his men shot a malignant of the horrors: the head of a monkey, the body of a tanuki, the legs of a tiger, and the tail from a serpent.”

Kirinmaru chuckled to himself ruefully, “And it happened that he found me hiding amidst the sake barrels, trembling in fear. That day he picked me up, put food in my stomach, gave me gardens to walk in, and raised me as his own son …”

“Kouta-sama would recount that tale to me sometimes, as I did my studies, that one of his men would never forget the sight of the creature’s eyes gazing coldly at him, as they buried that creature, and promised me that when I was of age…” Kirinmaru reached his hand to rub small circles onto the floor for comfort. “I would make a pilgrimage to pray to a local deity to pacify the creature, and that walk would take 20 days…”

Midoriko squinted her eyes, glimpsing at his handsome face. “And it happens that you got lost here, that Kouta-sama should give you proper directions so that you are not walking around aimlessly…”

“Perhaps…because…I am simply…Human…” Well, I am that useless, Kirinmaru thought to himself. Of course, being a human is so exhausting…

Midoriko raised her eyebrow. “Then that is how you live to tell the tale…” 

“Perhaps it was the will of the gods or something…whenever it was, that I lived.” Quietly, Kirinmaru forced himself to not touch the ends of the ponytail, mesmerised by her beauty. “Crossing its paths will lead to misfortune, priestess; not even one that is strong like you should take that…” 

“Then how do I know if I could trust you if you only briefly see that creature…” Midoriko huffed her cheeks. “What if you want to bring us to your group of bandits with a pretty face like yours?”

“I know it is little knowledge…” Kirinmaru mumbled incoherently. “I would guess the arrow’s body is made of the wood that could be affiliated with the creature, and it was of pure coincidence, as I walked this path to redeem that poor creature, that dark clouds surround the place, darker than the thunder gods could ever make with their dance…” Quietly, he drifted to sleep, holding her hand. Midoriko in return laid her feet down, moving her heels back and forth on the tatami mat.

Kirinmaru tutted quietly. “You can feel it in your reiki, Midoriko…” he said, yawning over that sweet aroma she emitted. “I am surprised that a priestess like you was unaware of that; such a pity that the old ways are gone…”

Midoriko raised an eyebrow. He sounds as if he cared about these things . “Afraid to admit it; I think I am still learning…” She sucked her lips a little, forcing herself to press her hand onto his chest, allowing waves of warm reiki to bathe him. “I think…I could use your knowledge to see if what you said affected the prince’s health…However, Kitsu-chan is hard to please….and it would be best for you to clean up and stop looking like a hungry beggar…” 

Kirinmaru sniffed himself, and scrunched his nose at the odour. It seemed that the reiki Midoriko pressed on Kirinmaru’s chest slowly settled in his veins.

Midoriko forced herself to say that name. “Nishi…do not worry. Kitsu is a good listener…” Calmly, she dropped the rag back to the bucket. “For now, I need you to recover, so you will be healthy for the journey ahead, if what you said is true.”

“I will be away with Kitsu-chan to do some cleansings in the area, should any bandits want to rob you…” Midoriko reluctantly tossed her bow and arrows over to him. “I suppose that if your Kouta-sama taught you to fight, you can defend yourself…” Midoriko puffed her cheeks a little. “And if you need food, I suppose you are able to forage around the forest…” Kirinmaru gave a pleading expression. “Alright, I forgot you do not come out that often; there is a market where you can buy some supplies…” Midoriko tossed a pouch of coins to him.

Kirinmaru heaved a small sigh of relief, observing her small steps out of the hut. Strangely, her footprints left small plants at her side. However, they withered quickly as she left, leaving Kirinmaru to his thoughts.

This woman has no weakness and no resolve.

How shall I break her heart?

“Just cooperate with us by making yourself useful….and your head will always be attached to your neck…” 

////

Kirinmaru forced himself to lie down on the bed, only to hear the voice of his father speaking to him, recalling that time when they tried to hunt a rabbit in the human lands for a meal.

“I heard from others that you are the last beast king.”

Kirinmaru found himself poking over the corpse of the rabbit, only to see Koushirou gripping it gently. “Perhaps I am, and perhaps I am not…” He chuckled to himself at his naive reaction. “You speak like your mother: eloquent and yet so sad…”

“My son, my time is running out…” Koushirou calmly squatted down to his level, holding his chubby cheeks firmly, with the rabbit’s blood staining his face. “However, I will not hold that title to you, as the remaining beast king, the one who danced at the barrow of his enemies…”

“Titles will fade eventually, my son, and your heart is left to protect what is dear…”

What is dear, when my hands are emptied, father, save to hold Sunako’s wishes in my heart?

////

Two days later.

When Kirinmaru finally found the strength to stand again, he quickly gripped the arrow, forcing himself to walk to the nearby river. 

Kirinmaru felt that fear in his heart, thinking of a lie he had to hold, like the dagger blade to his neck. 

My escape has become so peaceful; not even Sunako knows I am transfigured.

Midoriko will somehow know that truth, but I…

I….

He did not care about the sky floating around him, causing strange shadows in his body, only to follow the nearby stream. His yoki fighting with Midoriko’s pure reiki made him clutch the arrow even tighter than ever, only finding a secluded corner where no human or youkai could see him.

Kirinmaru finally took a breath, bunching his long wavy hair into a makeshift ponytail, stripped from the famous crimson colour which the world knew, the remnants of the last beast king gone into the abyss. He quickly bit the hem of his kosode, to tie it neatly before the cut.

After all, a man with wild hair proves to be nefarious to the suspecting Kitsu.

Reaching the arrowhead that nearly pierced his throat, to cut it above his shaky hands. He found himself tearing up at that thought: his hair—the pride of his clan became a disappointment to all, even to dear Zero.

Father, if you are ever so kind, guide me.

Kirinmaru quickly stood up and searched for a corner to bathe himself in the cool water, not thinking about Midoriko as a human, but as an object for Sunako’s hands.

A heart must be stolen, even by sweet words.

He forced a smile on his face, staring at the blistering sky.

I must hold in my hands the beating heart of Midoriko, for she will never suspect my truth. 

The remaining luscious strands of Kirinmaru made their strange journey, from the crevices of the river onto the end of the edge of a waterfall. The remaining yoki in his hair slowly eroded a small patch of fertile land, and bloomed again to strange vines.

A truth that was not glimpsed between Kirinmaru and Midoriko themselves.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ꕥˏˋ°•*⁀➷

A/N: Well I would like to say a huge hello to you, whenever you stumbled it by accident or are following me in this story! I hope you are having fun with this, as much as I do!

As you see Kirinmaru has started his journey, which strangely becomes more fairytale-like as I go, I be like damn I am wearing my heart on my sleeve, here I did the homage to David Lean’s Doctor Zhivago with the flashback of Kirin’s papa Koushirou and him burying his mother to the opening scene of Zhivago witnessing a funeral, and even one of my pointers, I wrote I want a David Lean like ending for Kirinmaru to start his journey to the human world, which I found it the hardest to achieve, and took me a few days away from the draft to be happier to this, as I want some elements of foreshadowing of lineage which I am holding my tongue until much later. 

I have to give a shoutout to Serial for actually writing that idea on the meeting, as it was so fun and I love Midoriko’s sass, you can see slowly- we saw her more what we made of the canon which she is very stoic- that she is very vivacious and also a little stubborn vs what Kirinmaru is, at that moment which he is more of an empath and absorbing people’s energy.

And strangely Kirinmaru’s romantic words are so fun for me, though it can be a challenge to make the story flow a bit more.

Favourite scene for me to do; I would say the sleazy merchant and Kirinmaru being all naive, I was hugely inspired by Gaunter O’Dimm from the witcher games when I wrote it, and I enjoy that little humour when talking about virility which is *chef’s kiss* and oh the ending scene which Kirinmaru cut his wavy hair and floating in the river, I wanted to show that rite of passage in one way or another, and this image came in mind, that he abandoned that youkai side to be on the mission, but it shows the cracks here.

Just a question for the readers/writers since I love to hear from you, what are your formative films/books and how it affected your life, whether it is your writing or perhaps your perception? For me, it is always David Lean’s filmography especially Lawrence of Arabia, and now you see in I want you to come; Doctor Zhivago- that I based his romanticism on Omar Sharif’s performance as Doctor Zhivago especially his speaking, and his vulnerable gazes, I once joked to a few in the chat, Omar Sharif Kirinmaru let’s go (Now I call him Disney Princess Kirinmaru), which reminds me that I should watch Doctor Zhivago again at some point.

As always comments and feedback are so welcome in this story of mine, as the next one, the Nue is a pretty much a monster of the chapter which I am excited for all of you.

Chapter Text

Chapter 3: A beast that died within the boy.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

Midoriko chewed her lip, thinking about Nishi’s words as she wandered around the village after the exorcism of a house." What the hell is he saying? Is there any truth to it? Her hands quietly took the goods needed for that journey, the one where she encountered Kitsu bargaining with one of the tajiyas for supplies.

“Did you get to slit his throat for me…” Kitsu jokingly nudged Midoriko, bouncing the coin pouch. “Look, stop pouting, priestess; there is no way that ‘Nishi’ could be trusted.

“He could take you away for a night, to a sleazy brothel, make love to you and leave you with his child…” 

Kitsu sighed to herself as she gathered all the poisons needed for their mission, taking two coins to pass to the local herbalist. “At least you have me, Mii-chan. I could at least keep watch on you; where is your promise that you will be bound to no one…”

“Nishi said that the prince’s afflictions could be caused by a nue, a harbinger of bad luck, conjured by vengeance, and somehow my reiki sensed that he could be trusted…” Midoriko shrugged her shoulders, watching the young women gawking at the handsome strangers in the market. That is unusual, Midoriko spoke softly to herself. 

Kitsu glanced at Midoriko forcing herself to get the supplies for the long trip, including some new clothes for the stranger. “I think we will let him go, if what he said is true…”

Midoriko shrugged her shoulders. “Kitsu-chan, I know the world could be treacherous for us women…” she said, passing a small rice-ball to her. “He seems to have knowledge… and we could use that…”

/////

Kirinmaru came into the hut with his locks shortened, and his body refreshed. He forced himself to act human-like, by quickly going to the market with the coin pouch to get sticks of dango, which he chewed back and forth while enjoying the fresh breeze in the air. He could help but to have the lightness in his heart, no longer tormented by the garden’s burnt remains, or the glided conversations of Sunako and Zero.

But his soul remained invisible, except for that nagging thought.

Sunako’s words that bound him to his unusual fate.

Kirinmaru felt the swirl of his yoki pushing to hunt for Midoriko; he quickly ran away to the small corner in the village, repelling the contents from his stomach.

I must not think of her.

I must not think of her.

Kirinmaru forced himself to drag his feet back to the spring, rinsing himself of the foul odour, stabilising his emotions to focus on what was now.

To let her fall into that trap.

Kirinmaru forced himself to pick some flowers along the way back to her hut, twisting one of the withering wildflowers into his hair. Maybe she would like him prettier; however, as he stepped into the hut, the reiki that swirled in him dissolved the wilting wildflowers into mere ash, and he was there, left alone in the bare hut, with the dying flames flickering back and forth.

Maybe I should behave for her, tell her what I know about the nue.

Quietly, Kirinmaru forced himself to lie down, in anticipation of Midoriko’s arrival, with only sleep being his companion at this dire time.

His ears, however, could hear the grumbles between the two women—Kitsu and Midoriko, though different, were strangely synced, as if they were bound into one body. That demon slayer Kitsu yelled at the top of her lungs, her body engulfed with flames, pushing herself through the door. 

“Shit…I should have been more aggressive! What should I do, Mii-chan? Apply rouge to my lips and bow to idiots like them…” Midoriko heaved a little, tossing the clothes she bought for Kirinmaru to the side. 

“Kitsu-chan…if…”

“If you were more courtly, Kitsu…” Kirinmaru smiled sheepishly at Kitsu crossing her arms, fearing that her tongue would lash him. “You could earn the favour in a desirable manner…women like you…they….”

“Great…now I have been subjected to a man to teach me how to walk and talk…”

Midoriko chided Kitsu quietly. “Wait…I could speak to him…after all, it is not his place to say how we women behave…” Midoriko observed as Kirinmaru rubbed his hair, hiding his face in shame. 

“Sorry…I was…” he muttered, and Midoriko could help but notice a faint aroma in Nishi that was previously buried in dirt and sweat: he smelled like fresh grass after the rain, that she would dance in her girlhood. 

However, there is a faint note of flowers in the field, which is unusual for men. 

That is unusual.

Kirinmaru bit his tongue. “Yes…priestess Midoriko…” He quickly bowed to Midoriko, forcing himself not to comb the ends of her hair. “The nue, I know, was made by a spiteful noble over my father’s marriage; it was my guardian that was able to slay the creature…”

Midoriko pouted a little. “And what if your word is false…” 

Kirinmaru affirmed to Midoriko, “Then let me leave your side, because I feel unworthy…” 

Kitsu chimed to Kirinmaru coldly, exhausted over his romanticism. “Hey I think we should make our way, and for you Nishi…” She quickly tossed the new clothes to him. “Take that… I think the prince’s ministers would not appreciate a shabbily dressed man…” 

Kitsu quickly held Midoriko’s hand, pulling her away from Kirinmaru’s soft gaze. “The last thing we want to do is to deflower my friend by eating her vagina out????”

“What?” 

Midoriko’s expression nearly caused him to hide his embarrassment. “I did not…I…”

“Men…” Kitsu sighed to herself, hiding a chuckle beneath her breath. “Thinking with their cocks as usual. be careful when you talk to Nishi, Mi-chan…we do not desire a child in your belly…” She gave Midoriko a gentle pat on the head. “Right now…let’s not plant that thought in his mind...”

However, Midoriko held her breath, while Kirinmaru grappled with the new clothes.

“Please get dressed, by doing it yourself, while dressing like a peasant…what are you, a prince at court…” Midoriko glared at Kirinmaru, daring him to strip in front of her, only to be pushed out by the forcefield. 

“Somewhere else, not to defile a woman’s gaze..”

Midoriko forced herself not to be entranced by Kirinmaru’s scent, shaking her head, to see Kitsu smiling cheekily to her, making tea in the hut. “I do not believe a man of his size could survive a youkai attack; he is either stupidly lucky or it is just a facade…”

“I do not know, Kitsu-chan…” Midoriko mumbled quietly. “You seemed a little agitated when Nishi told you about your manners… did your blood come in…”

“No. It passes… it is just that…” Kitsu took a rag, cleaning the fans from the entrails of the youkai. “Men always look down on us; even for you, a powerful priestess, is it annoying that you are treated like a goddess on human soil?”

“A little…” Midoriko smiled. “I knew from when I was young that I have immense power and will always be connected to the world…” She took a cup of tea and sipped it gently. Kitsu crunched her eyebrows at Midoriko’s slight vulnerability.

It seemed oddly refreshing to hear Midoriko speak her mind. “I wonder, if some day, by prophecy or fate, that I will sacrifice my soul in exchange for my beauty…” She stretched her forearms, unaware of Kirinmaru listening in on their conversation. “I am perfectly fine to be alone…”

“Unless, of course…” Kitsu chuckled to herself, savouring the tea. “That said man fell over to you, to keep you as his wife…like a certain beast king Koushirou. Oh, his title was great—like he danced in the barrows of his enemies…” 

“In his human form,” Kitsu continued, “he could be mistaken for a tennyo with his vivid red hair and his burning gaze of green. It said that once, he visited the human lands, where he seemed undetectable to the naked eye, unless a human decided to harm any animal that was under his protection. That tale was rare; however, circumstances changed. All of his allies left him because fragments of his did not act like him, and favoured the other child, of course, sired by another...”

Kirinmaru bit his tongue in fear at Kitsu’s suspicions. He knew to be careful with his words, especially with his father’s last words, to protect what was dear to him.

“And what fragment, Kitsu-chan…” Midoriko sighed a little. “And what does it have to do with me, that you have to bring up a beast king in whom I am not interested…” She was unaware of Kirinmaru peering through the gap, thinking about that faint smile on his father’s face, leaning his body upon the tree truck, imagining his mother laying her head on his shoulder, despite the fact she was gone long ago.

Son, long ago — I died with your mother. Do not worry; I made my sacrifice.  

“He suffered greatly, and I heard that fragment’s head will make a good price in my book…” Kitsu chuckled to herself. “Perhaps, as we speak, he follows the paths like his pathetic father to human lands, searching for that half…” She took away the cup of tea from Midoriko’s hands.

There is a somberness in Kitsu’s voice.

“That is why I will protect you; you do not deserve to be crumbled by anyone, by neither a fallen beast king nor some drunkard...” 

“I think it is noble of you, Kitsu…” Midoriko shrugged her shoulders. “However, I will not be immune to that, like that beast king, per se, after all…” She took the cup back to her hands. 

Looking back at the darkening sky, she did not realise that Kirinmaru had come in, dressed in a simple navy blue kosode and grey hakama pants. His eyes softened at the sight of the strong priestess, as her face grew deep in conversation. “Sorry,” he said, digging his feet upon the floor. Midoriko could barely catch her breath over that sight: was it by fate that she chose the colours that suited him? He seemed like a god walking those lands with his intense emerald gaze, and his hands clutched quietly to his sides. 

“Should we make our way to the palace before it gets dark…” Kirinmaru muttered sadly, grounding himself to her lovely scent.  “I think it will be a long journey…”

Kitsu cocked her eyebrow. “Perhaps you are right…” she said, looking over the darkening clouds of the view. “We must move quickly…”

“I suppose you have something sentimental to bring…”

“I have nothing but empty hands…” Kirinmaru spoke sadly, forcing himself not to look beyond the hut. “Shall we go…”

However, the shadows peeked inside the hut and disappeared in seconds, as he followed the two girls out of the hut.

He did not think who would follow him, but to hunger for that heart to lay on the platter.

Midoriko coldly glanced at him. “Yes…we should.”

//////

During their walk, Kirinmaru grew uneasy over the darkness of the forests, while the girls seemed to stare at it with much confidence. “Midoriko-sama…”

Kitsu rolled her eyes. “What do you want, lover boy? My friend Mii-chan is not for you to hold her hand?”

“I am scared…” Kirinmaru muttered quietly. “Apologies…I…feel safe with her…”

“I know…” 

Kitsu rolled her eyes. “Every man will proclaim that, Nishi. You want a woman by your side, with your hands over her nether regions, and her mouth over your…” 

Midoriko glared at Kitsu coldly. “You are being awful…” Quietly, Midoriko scooted herself to Kirinmaru’s side, where he breathed in her aroma.

Of pine.

How strange for a woman to smell like this. However, Kirinmaru gave a small smile at that sight, though he found his stomach churning at the yoki repressed here.

“Fine…fine…go and talk with him, be sure it is about that ugly thing, not your vagina…”

Midoriko smiled a little at him. “Do not mind Kitsu…she is like that, but she is the most loyal friend…” She calmly watched the darkening clouds. “Take it as a joke, though I should have purified her mouth.”

—

“You know what, Nishi….” Kitsu chuckled to herself. “Hate to admit it, but if the gods are kind to you…you will make a pretty woman…” Kirinmaru found himself blushing from her crass remark.

“In what…way…”

Kitsu rolled her eyes. “Mii-chan, should we end that….if we survive this….I shall hold you.”

Kirinmaru felt a certain boldness in his words: maybe I shall speak . “Kitsu… once we are able to solve the prince’s ailment…” He found himself gazing over at Midoriko, who was walking gently, unaware of her feet slowly growing little shoots in the ground. “I was thinking, what if I can hold men to my heart…” Kitsu raised an eyebrow. “In guise as a woman, to be soft and tender to those near and dear…”

Kitsu found herself laughing in glee. “Oh Nishi, innocent as a baby deer… this would not happen… I wonder where you get that inspiration from…”

Kitsu nudged Midoriko. “I have a feeling that he can never let go of his mother’s breast…pitiful…

“Do not play with Nishi’s words; he is desiring your vagina, Mii-Chan…basically he wanted you to be f**ked.”

Midoriko hastily blurted to Kitsu: ” My what?? What's wrong with my vagina???" She made an eye roll towards Kitsu.

Kirinmaru did not see Kitsu’s smug smile. “Nothing! it's probably a really nice vagina…” Kirinmaru blurted out loudly, nearing tripping upon an overgrown tree root. His eyes nearly divert to Midoriko’s calm gait, managing to pass through the tree roots with ease.

“I just want to be with Midoriko…”, 

Little did he know that Kitsu followed suit, nearly grabbing her shoulders tightly- noticing how Midoriko’s body is warm at Kirinmaru’s remark.

Kitsu hissed at Kirinmaru. “Well thank you…for making my friend flustered…” She used her index and middle finger to her eyes and towards Kirinmaru. “How about after this mess, we will dress in our most loveliest and see how many men are wooed, and if I win, I get to keep her virginity under me…”

Kirinmaru shrank into himself a little at Kitsu’s words. There was no way he could get close to Midoriko. 

“Shit…” Kitsu swore, “Looks like we are here.” Dark clouds swarmed the edge of the palace, with only glimmers of paper lanterns peeking through the darkness. Kitsu muttered to herself. “I thought that Denzou said that the thing that wiped out all of his men seemed small…but this…” She chewed her lip back and forth. “The air is filled with bad miasma and I cannot see where the hell is that thing he talked about…” She put on her mask and passed another to Midoriko. “Take that…” Quietly, Midoriko wore the mask, leaving Kirinmaru choking on the miasma. “Even if you have the strongest reiki, Mii-chan, more than I have, you are still human, after all…”

“How about Nishi?”

Midoriko glanced at Nishi forcing himself not to breathe into the air, and reluctantly wrote a kanji in his hand to give him a bubble of clear air. Kitsu chuckled to herself. “I think he is able to solve that; probably his guardian taught him some basic omyoji spells to deal with it… it is more of a flight reaction…”

“How do you know…”

“Beginner’s luck…” Kitsu nudged Midoriko. “Seen a lot in practising mikos and monks, only to fail miserably, and I do not even think he could survive the world without the need of material goods…” Before Kitsu could say what she desired in her hair, an old man wearing a silk overcoat shimmered in the dark, who wore the same face covering as them. 

And instead of looking at Kitsu and Midoriko, he glided his way like a leaf in the wind towards Kirinmaru’s side.

“Welcome, esteemed young man, for I am the esteemed Mamori-sama, minister to our afflicted prince Ryoryuu-sama….”. He quickly bowed to Kirinmaru. “I pray that you will be of help to solve the….”

Kirinmaru bowed to him. “Sir…Mamori-sama, I am just a mere companion—Nishi to these two ladies—they beckoned my call…I am…” Mamori glared at them coldly. “One is a tajiya that could solve the prince’s afflictions, and another a priestess…”

“These women??? And you, as their servant? What a shame…”

“They should bring pleasure to our afflicted prince rather than murder the beast within…especially the shorter one…” Mamori patted his hand onto Midoriko’s shoulder, watching a slight tremble in her lips. “Instead of weapons, they should have brought the finest instruments and make-up to make our master’s life easier.”

Kitsu rolled her eyes at Mamori’s comments, giving a slap to his face. “I am…sorry…what are we…pleasurable objects?”

Kirinmaru’s eyes widened in horror at that crass remark. “Listen…Mamori…tell all of the men in the palace that their mothers who tirelessly carried them in their wombs, that they should run to their graves and plead for their forgiveness…”

“I was summoned by one of the leaders to cure the prince’s aliment…so you better let us in…before…” Kitsu grew tempted to take out her hidden blades from her suit, to make an ugly scar on his gaunt face.

“Enough, Kitsu-chan…”  Midoriko stood her ground, holding her arm. “You who spoke— Mamori-sama—we, the tajiya, my friend who can easily feed your body to the dogs—Kitsu-chan, and I, Midoriko, were called to solve your prince’s health, not to argue over how our bodies give pleasure to…” Her lips furrowed with anger. “We could simply leave this place right now, and take on other duties, and your prince will die a slow death for all I care.”

Kitsu gave a gentle nod of approval, letting go of the fans that could easily slit his throat. Kirinmaru stood there, bewildered by Midoriko’s resolve. He could feel it in his repressed youki. That is not worth your fight….we can… However, Midoriko did not flinch at the official’s words instead bowing to the official. “Unless…”

The wind howled loudly, causing the trees to sway violently. Mamori raised his eyebrows. “....Sorry I forget…damn the wind….” He tried to avert his gaze on Midoriko, Kitsu chewed her lips in annoyance. “I forget your name…” Midoriko sighed quietly, perhaps he is doing it on purpose. “Please walk briskly, it is risky these days to catch a cold, of course with the jyaki being thick that it made me sick.”

“Midoriko. If you are interested in the name meaning-it is green child…” 

Somehow that name struck Mamori like a lightning bolt. “Wait??? Oh….My manners…Midoriko, rumours said you took a herb to cure a child not too long ago, and your reiki that cleanse a…” Kitsu pouted again at that change of attitude. “OH WHAT BLISS!”

“Midoriko-sama???” 

Kitsu mumbled under her breath, unaware of the falling leaves that fell on their feet “Someone must have embellished it one way or another, making Mii-chan a deity, an image of reverence and beauty…Nishi I…” Kirinmaru bite his tongue, as that image of Midoriko as a deity seems not far off. “Tales and revelations are nothing, we are here to cure the prince and run. So follow what we do, and your neck is safe.”

Mamori covered his face in shame, on that sudden truth “But you are too beautiful, like the goddess in the lands….” Kitsu rolled her eyes at that official, Mamori-sama, taking aback her words and kneeling on the floor. “If I knew you were here, I would have treated you with the utmost hospitality…” He quickly swung his hands unto the other servants to bring them in quickly. “Come to the barrier made by our monk, that should heal you from walking in these woods, welcome…welcome…welcome…”

The trio were greeted by an old manservant wearing a grey silk kosode, with his sleeves dragging down the floor. 

“You must be exhausted, weary travellers…we prepared a room for you…” Kirinmaru observed one of the ladies giving him a specially wrapped sweet, at which Kitsu furrowed her eyebrows. Perhaps she was not welcome in the house, and Kirinmaru’s good looks must have caused an impression on her, as he was given bottles of sake to drink, which he took with much joy. Kitsu glared at Kirinmaru, observing the covered statues in the palace, walking through the hallways, noticing a nauseating aroma of ozone that made him tremble. However, Kirinmaru found his youki screaming loudly, limping his way to the accommodations for the evening, mocking him for denying his true identity.

Kitsu raised an eyebrow at him trying to cover his mouth from smelling the aromas. “What, come on, Nishi, limping is for the weak…sheesh, I feel that I am taking care of you like a hapless mother.” She noticed the sutras in the pillars slowly peeling away, allowing the fog to be heavier with that foul odour.

His creaky voice called the trio to a comfortable room, well-lit with candles around the area, a bonsai tree, and simple food on the table.

“Your room, for the evening…I hope…”

Kitsu grinned coldly at that manservant. “Split it into two, because Nishi needs to stay in his own room, for the safety of my friend Midoriko-sama…”

“Yes…” The manservant shivered in fear. “As you wish, my lady…” He called the young lady dressed in pink robes to scramble to make up a room for Kirinmaru.

Kitsu gave a shit-eating grin to the servant. She spoke to Midoriko harshly, as they watched the servants running up and down, giving dinner to the officials of that palace. “Damn it! I should have dropped your name when we talked to that bastard…” Kitsu placed her palm to cover her face in shame. “These officials would not subject us to this nonsense, and actually do not care about Nishi…”

“Even if I spoke my name, and my intention was true…” Midoriko smiled calmly, glancing over the scene of medicine sellers bringing the finest herbs to the palace. “We are still subjected to the words of men, sad… for they forgot it was Ame No Uzume that brought light to the world.”

Kitsu shrugged her shoulders, taking off the mask from her face. “True, but the men would reign themselves supreme thanks to a human emperor descending to the world…” 

The lady servant bowed to Kirinmaru quickly. “Master, as requested by the demon slayer, you shall sleep separately…from Midoriko-sama…” 

“Oh…”

Kitsu quickly snatched Midoriko from Kirinmaru’s gaze. “We will let Midoriko speak to the official since you are hopeless to speak to him, Nishi. So much for your lies that you have experience in the court.” The lady servant opened the door to let Kirinmaru in, with the window opening, showing the swirling clouds growing darker at every second. “There is no way; he is raised as a noble…”

“Yes…I…”

Kirinmaru forced himself to lean his body against the wall, looking over a worn-out scroll painting of the prince, staring at the lovely painted face of his. 

That must be the afflicted prince, Ryoruu-sama.

Why does he look like me, so full of life, and yet so melancholic? 

Kirinmaru stared at the clouds forming a face that he knew so briefly, and yet disappeared into thin air. He found his youki slowly choking him, calling out to him to hunt for Midoriko, and hearing the voice of Sunako.

What kind of man are you, that you resist a woman’s touch?

A peal of lightning struck outside the room, before it briefly disappeared, leaving Kitsu and Midoriko staring at him. “Come on Nishi…stop daydreaming… We have to listen to the man’s case; there is no use grovelling over what is past…”

“I understand…” Kirinmaru’s voice wobbled in fear. “Is it me, or does this palace…feel evil…” Midoriko calmly gazed at him. “Like it wants me to disappear…”

“I also feel it too, Nishi…” Midoriko moved her head up calmly, like a king walking towards his lands, reminding him of his father’s calmness before battle, to dance at the barrows of his enemies. “If you want…” Midoriko reluctantly touched his hand, allowing her reiki to swell around him.

Somehow, Kirinmaru felt calm with her. “You can think of a happier time,” she murmured, “and it will pass….” 

Looking over the bare forest, thinking about how his mother’s tears would weep at the flowers withering at her touch.

//////

My son….

Mama….

Kirinmaru held her tightly, breathing into her calm aroma. Do not cry, papa will be back. 

Chaeyori wiped the tears from her eyes, allowing him to pluck the flowers, and his hands somehow revived them. 

You are right. Papa would be happy if you helped me maintain the garden.

Kirinmaru found his tears staining her robes, which, in her little power, made little flowers in the ground to beautify the garden.

I wish to stay with you, Mama, in the gardens. Forever.  I hate Zero-imoto-chan and her people. They called me a coward for standing up against a servant; she whipped him because she did not get her favourite food.

You will make papa sad, if you say this. Chaeyori spoke softly, carding her fingers into his hair. You are perfect as you are, my son. People may despise softness in this world. Papa would appreciate that…

A handsome man, Koushirou entered the gardens, kissed his wife so tenderly, and tucked a hair lock behind her ear. My son, do not make your mother grieve. There was sadness in his smile, watching his wife trying to stay alive. Calmly he picked him up and lifted him to see the beauty of his garden. Saying these words will hurt her. Listen, I heard from the servants about Zero’s actions. You are as brave as any warrior in the field; sometimes it is frightening to speak the truth to others who oppose.

You took that trait of your mother well, to show kindness to those who are weaker than you…to me…that is…

////

“To my master’s room…be mindful…as…”

They entered the room, where Kirinmaru felt his stomach twisting over the sight, and Mamori bowed down to his feet. “Midoriko-sama…” The servants hurriedly patted the prince’s forehead with clean rags, his face marked like the stripes of a tiger glowing eerily back and forth, and his mouth foaming, causing a foul odour. “Thanks be to the gods that you are around—it was two weeks ago: Ryoruu-sama went for a hunt with other nobles when he was struck with a burning fever…the clouds seemed clear. And we thought it was a common ailment, so we gave him cooling water to quell the heat…”

“The palace was surrounded by dark clouds, and horrible miasma plagued everyone, including his future fiancée…” The old manservant bowed to Midoriko and Kitsu, burdened by the prince’s wheezing. “We called everyone, from the finest doctors, to travelling monks and nuns, to powerful…priestesses, with the monk only advising us briefly to constantly change the sutras to allow us to breathe fresh air…”

Midoriko pouted a little. “That is a start, but we need to note the root of it. Youkais would be attracted to something…did Ryoruu-sama do something before the hunt, like tearing something sacred? Because it would be an open target.” 

“Important, Midoriko-sama; what are you, stuck in the darkness???” Mamori barked at Midoriko. “Who is important…the age of the gods is dead…and so is the age of demons crawling throughout the land…”

Kirinmaru spoke calmly. “I know these markings from my readings; I may be wrong, Mamori-sama…” She observed the prince’s face, which resembled a beast king whom he had known before. No one would possess markings like that in human flesh, except youkais in his castle. Mamori dropped his defence to listen to Kirinmaru, observing his hands parallel to his knees, bowing down to him, holding his composure, amidst Kitsu rolling her eyes at his words, glaring at Midoriko for reassurance. “That could be caused by an ancient creature called a ‘Nue’, a harbinger of destruction…”

“It could be a retribution of the prince’s actions…” He looked over at Kitsu. “Kitsu, do you notice, as we made our way to the rooms where the statues are covered…”

Kitsu frowned a little.

“Yeah…and from the looks of it…” Kitsu bit her thumb in deep thought. “It looks like an important patron, linked to him, but I cannot think of anyone in mind…”

“Why ask these women…” Mamori protested loudly, unaware that the black smoke smouldered around the group, with Midoriko making quick hand signs to dispel the miasma. “I trust you more than these mere whores; not even Midoriko-sama knows the true cause of our prince’s ailment.”

“I trust these women’s judgement on finding the root of it more than I. I just know the creature from my experience…” 

Kirinmaru glared at the bare patch of the forest. “And I suppose it has to do with that bare patch of forest in your lands…” 

Mamori rubbed his head back and forth. “I suppose so. It was supposed to be sacred for his ancestors past, but he wanted to build his paladin for his future bride…”

Midoriko pouted a little. “Indeed, your prince caused the wrath of someone important…” She sighed to herself, as she found her body wobbly from dispelling such evil. “That is wonderful, trying to impress the bride to be struck dead; I suppose her father grew wrathful over the death of her daughter…”

“I do not know, Midoriko-sama…” A loud thunderclap echoed in their ears, and Mamori’s thoughts were interrupted by the cry of a servant. “Quickly!! The roof of Ryoruu-sama’s gardens caught fire…” Kitsu quickly got herself up, staring at both. “I think it would be best for you and Nishi to stay with the ailing prince; I need to see if that ‘Nue’  is real…” 

Midoriko nodded at Kitsu.

“Stay safe, Kitsu…”

Kitsu quickly opened one of the compartments to pour the powder in her mouth. “I have dealt with bigger, Mii-chan; remember that scar on my back, from a panther demon I slayed with my uncle…” She chuckled to herself as she took that mask to cover her mouth. “Nishi cannot even hurt a fly compared to this thing…”

“We need to check on the prince…”

Calmly, both Midoriko and Kirinmaru settled themselves in the shadows of the room , with Midoriko closing her eyes, purifying the room with clean air. “Ryoruu-sama…be at ease…” She placed her hands onto his heaving chest, watching his breathing ease with the energy swelling from her hands on his veins. She bit her tongue to force herself to keep awake. “Nishi…pinch me if you must, for I must keep him alive…”

Kirinmaru sadly smiled at Midoriko. “There is no way…Midoriko, with all of the cleansing and barriers you can create…the prince would be forever tormented with that illness…” He watched the flames die, and the people yelling for commands. “Unless we can take something out of the forest, fashion it into an arrow, and shoot it.”

“How do you know…”

“Are you a god? A training priest?” Midoriko frowned her eyebrows, glimpsing the creature’s face gnashing at the crowd, with Kitsu repelling it with holy salt in her mouth to make it scream in agony. “For an ordinary man, you seem to have a wealth of knowledge about this one in particular…”

“There was that night when I wandered around my guardian’s room, because I couldn't sleep due to seeing a mask coming out from the shadows…” Kirinmaru smiled calmly, pulling down the curtains to blind them from the horrid sight. “There was an arrow standing to the side…he was reading his book with little candlelight, Midoriko, and I asked if it was related to the creature that his men shot…” His soft tremble soothed Midoriko as she constantly moved her hands to keep the pure energy flowing, the stripes slowly fading away from the prince’s face. Kirinmaru gently held her body upright, preventing her from slumping down to the prince’s chest.

“It is said that the forest whispered to one of his men when he looked for supplies for my guardian, calling it to chop one of the trees…for he heard a grieving voice that one of his daughters was willing to sacrifice her life to be that arrow, for she foresaw a child in danger…”

Midoriko yawned over that story. “And…I supposed it was by fate that you were saved.”

“If you believe it, Midoriko…” Kirinmaru allowed Midoriko to fall asleep on his chest, hearing the stillness of her heartbeat.

Such a precious sound.

So dear.

Kirinmaru forced himself not to touch the gap of her breasts, only staying up during the night to hear that sweet melody, drowning away the yells and protests of the crowd below the palace grounds..

Maybe Sunako can wait. 

His eyes stung with tears, soothed by the sweet sound of Midoriko’s heartbeat, and the prince’s relaxed breathing through the chaotic night.

---

Midoriko found her eyes stinging at the sun’s rays, opening to the sight of waking up to Kirinmaru asleep, sprouting a serene smile on his face, and the prince’s face marred with those ugly marks again.

Shit, did I fall asleep on him? 

Quickly, Midoriko scrambled to make barriers to ease the prince’s pain, only to hear the groans of Kitsu in the distance.

“How is the prince doing?” Kitsu grumbled at Midoriko, cleaning off the soot from her face. “And oh, pretty boy….did he…” Midoriko pressed her finger onto Kitsu’s lips, forcing herself to wriggle away from Kirinmaru’s heavy head. 

“I think he took up the duty to guard me from harm…” 

Kitsu grinned darkly. “Yeah this thing…maybe that Nishi is right….it is no ordinary youkai; this motherf**ker seems impossible to catch, like the amount of holy salts I ingested made me sick…” Her body slumped from that long evening of fighting the flames.

“There is no way to defeat it…”

Midoriko gave Kitsu a gentle squeeze on the hand. “Unless we can try to see if the forest is bound to that creature and fashioned an arrow from its wood…”

“Where the hell did you get this idea from?”

Midoriko bit her tongue. “While I was trying to ease Ryoruu-sama’s breathing, Nishi mentioned it…we could give this a try…unless…” 

Kirinmaru gave a sweet grin to Midoriko, lips slightly parted over that joyous sight. “May I volunteer myself to find it…I somehow know it better than you two…” His eyes were downcast with awe over Midoriko’s strength.

“Oh, morning…” he added; Kirinmaru found his ears reddened with embarrassment. “Did you sleep well…”

Midoriko nodded quickly. “Yes…Nishi…I have been…” 

Kitsu frowned at Kirinmaru, forcing himself to stretch his body from the knots. “Nishi….I think you should leave…” 

Kirinmaru bowed to both ladies, glimpsing at the sight of the prince writhing in pain, Kitsu pouring powder into his mouth, and Midoriko finally able to lay down on the floor and sleep peacefully.

He wrote a word onto his palm to grant him peace that Kitsu would protect Midoriko’s heartbeat.

/////

Kirinmaru descended upon the dining room, only to see their faces being exhausted from a long evening. No wonder Kitsu is pissed with me, Kirinmaru thought, the nue is a challenge for the human soul. He quietly observed the cloth of the statue slowly dropping down to reveal its expression. Its tongue sticking out fiercely pierced his soul with such fear.

Kirinmaru found his blood growing cold over that statue, imposing and yet so frightening. 

“That….” An old lady mumbled to herself, holding the bowl of rice gruel for the prince to eat. “Renju-o-sama is long gone; he is nothing but a figment of your imagination, young man…” She covered the statue back with heavy silk. “To woo the dead princess as a sign that he would be bound to her.”

Kirinmaru nodded quietly. Like me, perhaps. 

“We just have to pray that the gods will be kind to Ryoruu-sama…” The old lady sternly glared at Kirinmaru. “Gods should at least hold our hands, not tempt us.”

“Speaking of which…” Kirinmaru mumbled to the old lady. “Do you know where Renju-o-sama’s forest is…”

“Ugh, you are too curious…”

I pray that you do not come out of the forest with your corpse on the grass…

Kirinmaru quietly walked out of the pure energy of the palace to see the devastation of the forest fire—strong burly men cleaning up the debris of planks, gilded ornaments scorched by the flames of yesteryear, and the burning stench of ash, all made his stomach twist in horror.

The wood.

Yes, the wood that would shoot the ‘nue’ down.

Kirinmaru felt the wind slowly pushing him into the blackened forests, his shoes digging upon the ground, hearing whispers in his mind.

A human wanting to steal to build his kingdom.

No, it cannot be. He is afraid of the evil that is coming.

Woe to the king whose ground crumbled with him.

What is he…I know who he is…The son of Koushirou-o-sama, the beast who danced in the barrows. 

Ye who comes to the forest, may ye die ingloriously like Koushirou-o-sama!

These voices caused Kirinmaru to cower in fear, until he smelt something calming amidst the horrifying woods. A single tree, standing strong amidst the array of burnt trees calling his name, and a voice that sounded like his mother.

Ye who come for me. Ye shall be brave.

But I have nothing to cut. I am not a woodsman, or a craftsman. For I desired an arrow to shoot the creature that tormented the prince.

Ah, you do not speak like a human. Heh, you speak like your father, Koushirou-sama… brave one. Renju-o-sama is lost…

Lost?

The voice slowly formed into an image of his mother, and she seemed to be very beautiful as he recalled his childhood days in that garden long ago.

His forests are his territory…long ago, he made a pact with the prince’s great grandfather, and they were known to fight many many battles together; in exchange, Renju-o-sama became his patron which protected that clan.

You will bring him peace, if I offer my body to become the arrow, for I am the last link to the forest. 

No, I cannot. I am not strong. I do not have the fighting prowess for those who came before me.

Then who…

Midoriko-sama. A brave priestess. Kirinmaru bowed to that spirit. She knows the ways of the bow better than I. 

Ah, very well. At least you speak humbly….before I surrender my life to your priestess. That name, the one who speaks to me, may I remember you in death. 

Kirinmaru. Son of Koushirou, the beast king who danced at the barrows of his enemies.

He hated that title, but it had to be ensured in his mind for the tree to uphold his promise to save the prince.

Kirinmaru…I see you are sad. The tree spoke to him. What is your wish, if you do not want to dance at the barrows of your enemies like your father?

His eyes glimpsed the leaves forming a naked Midoriko, dancing around the burnt trees, with every step growing new life. And his hand, holding it (the burnt leaves leftover from that strange dance) so tenderly to that illusion that she disappeared into the darkness.

I…I…

Heh…no surprise…you spoke like him, and yet you trembled. Why did you descend to human lands, to repeat the same cycle as your father? To love endlessly and sacrifice your immortality to the altar of mortality…

You wished not to speak about why you pursued her. As you wish: a man’s inner self must not be spoken if he did not desire that.

The tree gave a gentle warm light to him, slowly wilting into wood planks in his hands. 

Listen carefully. With my body, form the most beautiful arrow, and melt the statue of the image of Renju-o-sama to form an arrowhead.

Instruct the priestess to be awake around the hour of the ox. For her heart must be pure to shoot down the creature.

Before Kirinmaru could utter any parting words to the tree, he accidentally knocked his head on one of the dried branches of the tree, causing him to yelp in pain. And coincidentally, Midoriko was there, but clothed, frowning at the sight of Kirinmaru gazing wistfully at her, holding the planks of wood in his arms, covered with abrasions and bruises.

“Where the hell did you get that? At least you should have called me…”

Kirinmaru smiled sweetly. “I went to the forest…and it said that…an arrow made of this wood, and a statue bearing the one who afflicted the prince must be melted, and must be made to kill the harbinger of the prince’s illness…”

“Now???” Midoriko barked at Kirinmaru. “We…how…I….” 

Kirinmaru smiled quietly at her. “Do you trust me Midoriko…” He grounded himself with her scent, hiding his pleasure with fingers clasping in prayer. “Even I found my words little to your knowledge…” 

Midoriko chewed her lip, pulling his hand up from the forest floor, and she noticed him gazing at the burnt forest. “Right now, yes, Nishi…we need to see if the illness is linked to that arrow….” 

His poetic words consumed her, and yet, she feared it.

//////

Both entered the safe bubble of the palace, with Kitsu leaning on the wall, with the blood streaked in her hands. “Well you took so long, the prince seems to be getting worse from the looks of it…”

Kitsu noticed Kirinmaru’s somberness and Midoriko’s steely determination, unaware of the servants running up and down to bring nourishing food to the prince in deep panic. A measly monk trembled in fear as he approached the room, holding sutras to quell the miasma in the room.

Midoriko frowned at these words. “Kitsu-chan, I need to speak to Mamori-sama right now…”

“Afraid not…” Kitsu gave a rueful chuckle. “It seems our prince, in a trance, wrung his fingers around his neck, and snapped it…and he nearly possessed a servant, at which point I have no choice but to stab that young man, as he lunged at me like a wild boar,  though I hate for innocent blood to be stained on my hands…”

“Guessing that Nishi is right; this motherf**ker is indeed a bad omen…”

Midoriko calmly held Kitsu’s bloodstained hands, easing her miasma. “Do not worry, we are not bound by evil, for there is good and hope. And I think Nishi helped us, though…” Kirinmaru shuffled his feet back and forth. “Can you make an arrow body out of this wood….”

“Well…” Kistu grinned dryly at the panic of the servants, whose screams filled the air. “You need a metal head to spear the thing’s heart….and we do not have the luxury of a blacksmith who can conjure these things.”

"The flowers bloomed dull that spring," Kirinmaru mumbled sadly, revealing the statue hidden by the layers of silk to Kitsu and Midoriko. “For a sword’s thrust to a man’s heart makes the fields more fertile than mere petals…”

Kitsu raised her eyebrows. “Is it me, or is our friend too drunk from sake to muster haikus when people are dying…” His hand touched the frightening face of the statue.

“And I waited there…”

Kitsu rolled her eyes. “Nishi, we do not need poetry here; we are not court ladies waiting to be wooed by hapless men like you…” Midoriko felt a little prick in her body when she glanced at that statue's face.

“Is this the one?”

Kirinmaru quietly parted himself from the statue. “The tree who offered its life to be its final blow, called upon its master Renju-o-sama. A face wished I dared not see again.”

“That thing looks dusty…” Kitsu pursed her lips. “Are you sure that Nishi is not lying to us?” Kitsu used her strength to lift the statue and carried it around. “If not, his head would have been mine…” 

The statue’s head is obscured by the hands of the two girls, with Midoriko projecting her voice to the palace grounds. “We need a blacksmith to help us meld an arrowhead from that statue! If not, all of you will die!...” 

Quickly, one of the young men dressed in a grey kosode bowed to Midoriko. “Lady Midoriko…I…offer my services…to make the arrowhead, even if it is to heal my lord…”

Midoriko smiled a little. “Then you are honourable to do something selfless…Kitsu-chan… Take what you need to quell the creature; further actions will cause him to leak his yoki into the palace attendants.

“Nishi…I need you to guard the room of the prince…” Midoriko commanded him. “I can only trust you to do so.”

Midoriko slowly tried to let go of his hand, but Kirinmaru gripped hers, his eyes firm with determination. “Before you go, Midoriko…The tree spoke to me—if the beast must be quelled, it appears at the hour of the ox to do its dance, and it is that time to strike it with that arrow…”

“Please rest, priestess…” Kirinmaru swallowed the thought that calling her name made his heart ache. Though he would guess it could be the tree, speaking to him like a mouthpiece of her existence.

Midoriko smirked a little. “Do not worry; I have seen worse…and thank you…” 

Quietly, Kirinmaru forced himself to climb up the stairs to the cursed prince’s room to see the walls being stained by the blood of servants and the members of court. He wrote a small word of barrier to block the annoying monk from laying his sutras. “Ouji-sama…” he said, staring at the prince’s face writhing in pain, “I am not a worthy servant...and I may not bring you peace…”

“Lady Midoriko cared about you,” Kirinmaru continued, “Her heart is pure, unlike mine, yet you wish to be consumed by it…”

He found his body heavy from the long excursion in the woods, smelling the sickly smell of the burning garden.

“Let me be your companion tonight…” 

/////

Kirinmaru peered somberly at the giant pit his father Koushirou made, laying his dead mother down in the ground. He heard tales from members of court that his father hid his face with a mask after battle, to withhold those enemies alive, to kill them in a vulnerable position.

However, Koushirou wept profusely for his dead wife, allowing the tears to stain the pit. “My son…I am sorry I cannot do much for your mother…” Koushirou’s caked hands held onto Kirinmaru. “Perhaps the world was too heavy for her, but I know she is happy even in her lucidity…”

“What shall I do now, father…”

Koushirou took his fingernail, making him write a kanji on his trembling palm. “I learned this from long ago: the power of words can change you…” That word. 

Hope. 

It gave him comfort.

“Use this well, my son, for I do not have long to live…” Koushirou gently ruffled his wavy red hair. “And to think my son looks like me, rather than to Zero…and yet, I neglect my legacy. How pitiful…”

“You are not, father…you are strong…you...are…”

“Yes, I thought of this, until I met your mother…” Koushirou forced himself to smile amidst the pain. “Then again, I must meet another…if I perish, always hold your heart steadfast, son, your mother will….”

////

Kirinmaru woke up, feeling his stomach twisting in pain, glancing at the peal of lightning in the window, feeling the prince’s hands morphing into claws—tearing his flesh, Kirinmaru quickly held him down with a firm grip. “Do not worry, I am not here to hurt you…”

The prince, somehow quelled by his words as Kirinmaru quickly wrote a word on his forehead. It slowly receded his claws into human fingernails.

“Ouji-sama, please stay strong! Your ordeal is at its end…”

Kirinmaru ran quickly down from the room to see the palace surrounded by black smoke. Screams filled the air as men hurried to shoot a rain of arrows at the invisible creature, with them shouting ‘Fire’ upon that unusual force. The wind howled at the men being sliced by the creature’s claws.

“SHIT!” Kitsu was trying to catch the projections of the horrid creatures, using her fans to dispel their dark energy. “Why can’t his motherf**ker stay still…” 

Midoriko, meanwhile, pulled out paper dolls to hit the swirling clouds, only to be repelled by the horrid fog. “That creature would not bow down to you on command…” Midoriko squinted a little at the desolated palanquin, with the shimmering arrow on her back. “I just need to climb up to that tower to get a shot at that creature…”

“I will do it; just place a paper doll on my back for my protection…” Kirinmaru ran towards Midoriko, his hands gripping his knees. “I am not letting your life perish in vain…”

“Are you crazy???? You tripped and fell, and yet you want to face that thing, from which you could die???” 

Kirinmaru glanced at the face peering out of the shadows. “Trust me…and pray for my safety…”

Midoriko reluctantly placed a paper doll in his back, only casting a forcefield to repel the evil around her. “Go, before I regret it…”

Kiirnmaru heaved a breath, quickly running towards the desolated palanquin, waving his hand upon that masked creature shrouded by black smoke. “Oi!!!!” Kirinmaru found himself shivering in the pouring rain, gritting his teeth, forcefully climbing up to the top of the paladin. “UGLY! COME HERE!”

The storm cloud formed a creature so frightening that Kirinmaru used the sleeve to cover his nose from breathing in the miasma.  A rumbling voice echoed in his ears. 

“How very dare you…” Kirinmaru shivered in fear, holding himself to the edge of the roof. “A mere boy climbing to reach heaven to kill me…”

“You are nothing….”

The creature swirled back and forth around Kirinmaru, unaware of the clouds swarming its body. “Of what good you can bring to the table, my son…” 

Kirinmaru quickly peered down at Midoriko, holding the bow fearfully, pointing at the creature whom he had to distract. 

Midoriko...focus…do not worry about me…

That is not my father.

He would not speak ferociously with his son. He would hold his sword with grace. He bit his tongue, only to see his father’s face coming out of the clouds.

That was not his father, but another. Another.

Another beast king like his father. 

“Speak boy. Speak.”

I evoke the name of who has taunted me.

Kirinmaru quickly wrote the kanji of the name of his father, blowing it to the foul beast’s nostrils. Its form came so clear from the darkness, claws gnashing on him until he bled.  “I am…I wish to bring you peace.” Kirinmaru closed his eyes, despite his heart swelling in fear. 

Kirinmaru shivered at that voice. Why did he sound familiar? He could recognize that mask from the covered sheets, peering through the shadowed parts of the room, with only Zero grinning at them coldly, while he ran away to his mother’s arms at the now dilapidated gardens.

That must be Renju-o-sama.

He is the one who is transformed into a Nue.

“The son of Koushirou-o trying to kill me? A waste of time that you dressed as a human…How unloved you can get, that simply him f**king a whore like your mother…” The nue—Renju— mocked Kirinmaru, unaware that his mouth trembled in fear. “Like the damn prince, he must have sired a coward...running away from your mother’s breast…”

Kirinmaru yelled to Kitsu. “Oi!!! Can I get the fans…”

“What the hell??? What do you want to do, idiot???” Kitsu blurted loudly to Kirinmaru, trying to steady her feet upon the ground. “Entertain that creature ?? And hope the Nue would listen to reason” However Kirinmaru did not listen to Kitsu’s protests, instead steadying his breaths unto the Nue. “I do not think so…”

“I…I….we do not have the time, just pass me the fans!” The sound of the rain seems to make Kirinmaru’s protests even more profound than ever.

Kitsu quickly tossed the fans up, only to see Kirinmaru slip from the tiles of the paladin. Thankfully, he managed to hold his balance, gripping the fans in his hand. “I just remembered something!” Kirinmaru closed his eyes, placing his foot in front of the nue, allowing him to follow every move. “Trust me….” 

Kitsu squinted a little, to see the creature coming out slowly from the darkness, a horrid chimaera made of a tiger’s body swiping Kirinmaru’s tactful dancing. “What is your idea, dancing around that creature until your death??? This is not a courtly performance. We are slaying a youkai that we know nothing about?” 

Kirinmaru protested to Kitsu. “Do you want the prince to be better???” 

“Of course…if you can tell me why.” Kitsu shook her head to see him repel the clouds by blowing holy salt at them. With every swipe from the nue, the tiles slowly crumbled at the slow footwork from Kirinmaru. 

“Oh hell no,” Kitsu shouted. “You tend to trip and fall! These fans will cause me 5 meals to repair this…”

“Then let me do it…” Kirinmaru smiled wistfully at the girls. “Even if it brings me peace should I have danced myself to death for this…” Forcing himself to make small steps with his feet, Kirinmaru tried his hardest not to be out of breath. “I have a feeling…I do not know why…that I knew him in my past life…”

“Why didn't you say it sooner??”

Midoriko, stay focused. You need to be alive for me. 

The horrid beast laughed at him. “You…are…a coward…Kirinmaru…I pity your father…running away will…”  

Kirinmaru found himself sweating in fear, as his body grew heavy from his lunges. “I just realised that the prince broke a pact with a beast king, hence he became corrupted and the prince became ill…”

“He is incurable until we shoot the creature...”

“But…” Midoriko sensed the creature’s yoki swirling with anger and sadness over these words. She pulled out the special arrow from its carrier, keeping the ordinary one behind, and positioned herself with Kirinmaru’s moves. “Nishi…bring him nearer…”

“I am trying…” Kirinmaru muttered, but little did he know that the claw made a huge swipe onto his body, allowing the blood to bathe the broken tiles, around which he made footwork. “I do not know if I could hold it longer…” he added, staining the once-formless body, now swirling angrily with the blood from Kirinmaru, as its jaws nearly consumed his head.

He found himself trembling in fear, as he was bathed in the darkness of the nue.

Alright…shoot…shoot…

“Go…” Midoriko yelled loudly to herself, eyes determined to kill the nue. The arrow swung its course unto the chest of the creature.

The nue spoke to Kirinmaru.

Wait.

Something is coming.

A shimmering arrow infused with her energy bolted from the sky, raining down many rays of light around its body, making a loud howl that shook the palace grounds.

A crackling voice echoed in Kirinmaru’s ears, its vacant eyes staring at Kirinmaru coldly.  “Dance away…dance like your cowardly father…” The creature, ironically, danced, danced away into the darkness, taking its weight with Kirinmaru to the ground.

Midoriko yelled loudly to see Kirinmaru heaving in pain with blood oozing out of his chest. “Idiot! How did you…”

Kirinmaru did not speak, but stared at the corpse of the nue, haunted by its vacant eyes. Kitsu shook Kirinmaru violently. “Hey…you are alright…Nishi…though this thing’s aura makes me uncomfortable…”

“Hate to admit it….” Kitsu whispered to Midoriko’s ear, who had rushed to Kirinmaru’s side as well, “He is right now, and he actually saved our ass; I do not want to deal with this motherf**ker again…” 

The dark clouds soon parted into clear skies with the worrisome moon gazing upon them.

Kitsu mumbled under her breath “Should we check on the prince, and explain to him?” observing the servants trying to catch their breath over that horror.

Midoriko pouted a little, allowing Kitsu to take the fans out of Kirinmaru’s hands. “Let’s wait; we need to heal Nishi so he can explain what he knows about the nue’s true identity.”

///

A few days later.

Dance, dance away like your cowardly father…

That sentence haunted Kirinmaru’s mind, and he only recalled flashes of himself, dancing with the former beast king. Midoriko noticed that his head was lying on her lap, with his chest bandaged, and his cup of tea with calming herbs was not drunk by him. He calmly breathed in her scent, grounding himself from the horror he witnessed, hearing the mocking of the former beast king. “You seem to be brave, Midoriko-sama; perhaps what I spoke to the tree is right…” He was unaware of the flowers swaying in the once-vacant forest slowly coming back to life, with Ryoruu, pointing at the woodsman to plant saplings back to the barren grounds. He should have been be grateful that he actually came out alive and well, but others would think otherwise. 

“I am not…” 

“What a disappointment…” Kirinmaru gave a sad smile to Midoriko. “I found myself a coward to simply run away, but you, you faced adversity so beautifully, like a goddess, bringing hope to the prince’s court and the dead Mamori-sama…”

I am no goddess

I am an ordinary girl.

Midoriko held back her tears. “You are not; you are knowledgeable of things past and present…” she said, forcing herself to bind the wound with a clean bandage. ”Without you, we could not cure the prince! Even I am stumped as to what to do…”

“Ha…” Kirinmaru felt the choking feeling in his heart, playing with the ends of Midoriko’s hair, pushing a lock behind her ear. “Long ago, my father met a woman in the woods, where she lingered between the limbo of life and death…”

Forcefully, Kirinmaru took the cup of tea, sipping it slowly, glancing at Midoriko’s soft lips and doe eyes. “He took her somewhere far away, only fearful of her heartbeat fading away into the abyss…” Kirinmaru did not think of clawing into Midoriko’s chest, but instead watched her serene expression, listening to that intriguing tale. “You look exactly like her: fulfilled, and yet so lost.” 

“No…” Midoriko pouted at these words. “But is being fulfilled the thing you wanted…” Shrugging her shoulders, she filled the cup of tea to let him drink. “I suppose there is death to follow us.”

“Yes, she is alive, but with a cause: to be conjoined with my father in death, after she was buried in the woods…” Kirinmaru blinked a little, watching Kitsu flick her hands up and down, demanding payment from the officials. “The day he died, it was silent; and I guess my father thought, at the moment of death, that he could finally hold his goddess’ arms so tightly.”

“Perhaps he could not live without her.” Midoriko gave a resigned smile, watching Kirinmaru trying to fight that burden in his heart with a pained smile. Unconsciously, Midoriko touched his soft hair, actually enjoying his unusual aroma—like the gardens of her girlhood. “I am sorry, Nishi…sometimes we cannot control circumstances; we just have to tread what we can…” She clapped her hands back and forth twice. “If you do not mind…may I pray for the peace of your father…” 

Kirinmaru found himself gently gripping her wrist and kissing it tenderly, unaware of Kitsu looking over that scene. 

Quickly, Midoriko slapped his face, causing a swollen spot at the side of his lovely cheek.

“You do not need to, if you feel uncomfortable, priestess…I always lived in my head…but if you are so compelled…” Kirinmaru forced himself not to place his hand on her chest. “Your presence makes me happy enough that the prayers to the gods are meaningless to me…”

Midoriko pouted at these words. “Then I would wish them peace, out of my heart if you wish…your mother would be proud of a son who cares…we need more people like you…” Kirinmaru felt a heavy sinking in his heart. 

Am I too comfortable in this world that I desire to be at her side, that she becomes my moral centre?

No.

I must not think about it.

His eyes became glassy at that beauty. if I perish, it must be for her….

Kitsu called them out. “Oi! You two… especially you, Nishi…yes…Nishi…” 

Kirinmaru snapped out of his lamenting to see Midoriko blushing furiously. “Sorry, Kitsu-chan!!!” Kirinmaru found his legs wobbling from lying down on her lap for a long period of time. “Do you know where…” Kirinmaru stared at Midoriko affectionately, hungering to kiss her sweet lips, to the avail of Kitsu pressing her fists on her sides. 

“Nishi…I do not know why you are staring at my friend so affectionately; if you sully her, that organ that bears your children will disintegrate at that moment….”

Kirinmaru gulped at that threat, at which Kitsu made a smug smile at him. “That took me forever, but we got decent gold for the three of us…” Midoriko hugged Kitsu for such an achievement. “And yes…Nishi can stay with us; he could be useful in certain situations…”

Quietly, Kirinmaru moved to Midoriko’s side, observing the loose strands of her hair flowing up and down. “Should we leave after Nishi is healed up, because that motherf**er really messed him up…”

Midoriko yelled at Kitsu, “Stop swearing, Kitsu-chan! It would not do us good…”

“Tell it to the leader that two women and an idiot saved a prince’s life from a nue,” Kitsu boasted to Midoriko. “The prince is more than happy to welcome you back to do any exorcisms, because he owes an immense debt to you, and look what wares we have…” She slowly rolled out lovely silks to show Midoriko. “In fact, it’s fitting as I need this for a bet with Nishi, as he wanted you…”

“You know what, I heard from a travelling huntsman, as we were clearing up the forest, that we have a demon problem. He said that miasma bathed the fields, killing the people with thorns in their hearts. Pretty nasty shit…”

Kitsu gave a twinkle in her eye. “Perhaps this would be a nice breather from that ugly thing…”

Kirinmaru found himself falling asleep amidst the girls’ bickering. Oh how can I handle these two.

I was supposed to steal her heart, but she was the one who stole mine.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

Every song I write became an escape rope tied around my neck to pull me up to heaven.-Florence + The Machine: Heaven is Here

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

A/N: Hey all!  I hope you are well in this time, and coming here in this time- things are slowly becoming juicy in that story. I mean Kirin angst for all guys!!

The nue is a fascinating creature from Japanese mythology which I summarized it as a harbinger of doom, which has freakish proportions of a tanuki, tiger, snake and monkey- that sounds like nightmare fuel. I first encountered it by a Nioh boss fight of this creature which I am like WTF is that thing but dude the lore is amazing which I decided to expand on Kirinmaru’s psyche which I summarized it as a confrontation of his boyhood unto manhood, hence the title. I only see two depictions, other than the game that the ‘Nue’ is done well, which was Mononoke (This episode was soooo good, especially the game aspect) and Dororo, let me say give more love to the Nue guys <3

When I wrote that scene of Kirinmaru confronting the Nue, that song ‘Heaven is Here’ I played this on loop, there is that primal nature which he represses, especially that lyric which I shared as the opening of that story, that sometimes it can be a struggle to confront the demons of the past in the life which I feel it was that arc which his voice is muted that he be like I have to do it.

That idea of sexism is played here, which you will see more in the next chapter or so- it was a challenge to find that voice but I enjoy the strong friendship between Midoriko and Kitsu, and that vagina conversation is my favourite as we do not allow the girls in media to actually speak dirty which we should LMAO.

A question to you guys for this chapter: Which mythological creature which you guys wish that media would do more? I mean I would love to hear about your culture and more?

Chapter Text

Chapter 4: As good a place to fall to build our altar here

Arata looked over at Sunako, who was playing an instrument over the murky pond. He saw the fish poking through the surface, hungry for food. “Hello brother…” Sunako said; her smile brought such joy in Arata as she embraced a hug from her brother. “How is everything with your wife…”

“Blessed be those who came before…” Arata proclaimed to Sunako. “She blessed me with a healthy child, a girl, beautiful as you.” A pregnant pause filled the air, Arata looking over the fish gliding in the pond. “You would adore her…” Sunako withheld the ire over Arata’s new arrival, putting the instrument down to consciously caress her lower stomach. It should have been Kirinmaru’s child in Sunako’s womb, not her. “You will make a wonderful aunt to her…”

“...Well good…you know…” 

Sunako drew her head onto his shoulders. 

“I miss…Ki-ki…god he was so handsome, it is a pity that he could hold what we can.”

Arata smiled a little. “Patience, sister…” He gently clasped her hand. “That child will be your pride and joy; I believe he took a much longer time because he loved you and wanted the best nutrients for you…”

Sunako sighed dreamily, watching the fish in the murky pond calcify under her touch. “I really hope so…” The fish soon sank to the ground, like the many others she has touched before. Only gone at a brief moment.

“Come…Father is waiting for you…we need to speak about who we should invite to court…”

Sunako pouted to herself. “Yes, brother…”

“Sometimes, sister…you have to play the submissive role….after all, your husband’s lineage is more important than your wishes…”

Sunako thought to herself. 

Honestly. 

Kirinmaru is too easy to play like the calcified fish in the pond; it would be easy to display him amidst the murky waters.

I wonder if he ripped her heart out easily.

////

Kirinmaru took a deep breath, observing the passersby making their way towards whatever destination they would go, whether it was a child fed by the breast of his mother, a monk offering prayers to the divine, or even a merchant waving to the trio to buy their goods. True, the exorcism trip was truly exhausting, given the ache in his muscles—and him having scabs and scars in his legs from the constant falling in the nearby fields at the previous villages.

He felt a certain peace in his heart, unlike defeating the nue at Prince Ryoryuu’s palaces, that he would not confront a ghost of his past at the next venue, and based on Kitsu’s ire as she held two pouches of mon in her hands from fighting over the headsman.

It seemed that the job did not bring them much favour, despite saving the prince from certain torment. Perhaps the world is unfair to those who want to fight for their rights. Then again, Kirinmaru only barely reached Kitsu’s approval, and only for his knowledge of defeating the nue.

“Shit…why am I so tired right now…” Kitsu grumbled to herself, unaware that Kirinmaru was looking at Midoriko affectionately, and that her aura brought much peace to his aching heart. “Mii-chan, I must be more shrewd on my deals! This will barely feed the three of us, and at most we can scrap an overnight stay at some measly inn.”

Midoriko smiled quietly at Kitsu. “You win some, you lose some; just because we saved Ryoryuu-sama from certain torment does not mean we will earn certain fame in their hearts…”

“Ha…very funny…that youkai is not an easy foe to defeat…we should have been paid more…”

Kirinmaru furrowed his eyebrows at Kitsu, who was rolling her eyes that they were paid for a lesser job, when the mouths of villagers should spread their fame. “I was thinking,” Kitsu said. “If Nishi did not keep on tripping on the roots of that youkai, and if you had not constantly tried to heal him…” Kirinmaru found himself shuffling his hands deeper upon the fields at her words, plucking the flowers back and forth, trying to breathe through the sweet aromas to steady himself. “We could have its body quicker to the grumpy geezer…” Kitsu added; Midoriko patted Kitsu’s shoulders calmly, soothing her anger.

“You cannot win everything, Kitsu-chan…” Midoriko reiterated to the angry taijiya. “We have been walking there for hours; should we…”

Kirinmaru quickly dropped the flowers on the pathway, regretting how the petals were crushed by his feet.

“Yes…look, I am tired…Kitsu…You…deserve a…nap…”

Kitsu frowned at Kirinmaru’s choices of words. It did not soothe her anger at all. Kirinmaru bit his tongue. “Well…did…I…” 

Kitsu was right. Kirinmaru had to say the right words to her; after all, taijiyas hunted for the head of the last fragment of the last beast king.

That is such an awkward statement.

He who barely scraped through a fight, in contrast to Midoriko, who could defeat the plant youkai with her massive spiritual power.

And yet, he had to overcome her powerful nature.

And if aptly, they found a small spot to rest. Kitsu ran over to a small tree, leaning her back onto the bark of the tree. “FINALLY!!!” Kitsu yelled loudly at top of her lungs, forcing herself to stretch her muscles, sore from the long fight.

 Midoriko, meanwhile, placed her bow and arrows at her side. She took off her getas from her feet, allowing herself to wiggle her toes. “The weather seems so nice…” Midoriko said, and rubbed Kitsu’s hair gently, watching her friend forcing herself to drift to sleep. “Can we get Nishi to watch over you…” She could help but to stare at him pitifully as he tried his hardest to make himself comfortable by shuffling himself against the next tree, his eyes staring at her graceful ease over the rough terrains.

“He seems…tired…Kitsu-chan…do not be so hard on him. After all, he risked his life for us, for a creature unknown…”

Kitsu chuckled at Midoriko ruefully. “I know, I know, go and do what you need to do with your priestess duties…” Midoriko nodded calmly to her, giving her a squeeze on the shoulders, easing the knots in Kitsu’s body. 

“No,” Midoriko replied, “like you, I need a break too…”

“That makes two of us, women, exhausted from clearing all of the men’s bullshit…”

Midoriko did not catch Kitsu’s last statement, but instead, walked over to a nearby flower field, admiring the flowers fluttering in the wind, forcing herself not to look at Kirinmaru’s dazzling smile.

Kirinmaru shrugged his shoulders at the disappearing sight of Midoriko, and focused on Kitsu, who was fighting off her weariness in her body by stretching her legs up and down. “That youkai,” Kitsu said, “was a bitch to fight….this should make some nice dough to hold us until the next winter, even if that jackass Toshi did not fulfil his contract…”  

Kirimaru dug the nails onto his cheek, feeling the pinch in his nerves. Midoriko seemed so gentle with him and with Kitsu, and yet, her heart seemed shut. 

“You know it is rude to listen to my ramblings, Nishi…”

Kitsu was annoyingly sharp, one eye observing every move Kirinmaru made, despite that he awkwardly pushed against the tree bark. “Make yourself useful by watching out for Midoriko,” she added. “You never know what youkai will be crawling over for her spiritual energy, and a certain someone who dared to fuck her in the woods.”

Kirinmaru rolled his lip a little. “Oh? Where?” he asked as he rubbed his hair back and forth “Sorry, I thought you were asleep…”

“Taijiyas have their ways to observe the world. Well, if there is a man with a lusty spirit, I could pin you down…” Kitsu huffed to Kirinmaru. “But you saved Midoriko’s ass—and you seem decent—so I can trust you…” Kirinmaru gulped over Kitsu’s half-threat, daring not to look at her scowl. If there was one comfort, it was that she was going to take a nap, which hopefully would lift her spirits. 

Yes.

Find Midoriko.

That should not be hard.

Kirinmaru used a blunt fingernail to write the kanji for ‘strength’ to calm his fears, looking over a brightly coloured field. Kirinamru forced himself to touch part of the field, lamenting the loss of that garden where he would run freely to his mother, who was sitting peacefully by one of the flower bushes, watching skies change their colours back and forth. 

In that moment Kirinmaru decided to sit down in the field, watching the clouds float calmly, ignoring the fire that was burning within himself. A calm scent of pine blew through his nostrils, stilling his frightening heart, compelling him to find the source of that strange scent.

A figure running through the flower fields.

A figure that smelt like a forest, a goddess descending to mortal lands with screams of euphoric joy, which echoed in his ears.

Upon further inspection, that figure found herself skipping along the patches, unaware of man or beast seeing her. That face marred by dirt, and hands possibly scratched by the brambles and bushes, Midoriko—a powerful and fearful being—was now a girl.

Kirinmaru’s mind clicked to that strange memory: that memory that burned his veins. 

Wait, is Midoriko that goddess I saw dancing in the fields, without a care in the world?

Kirinmaru forced himself to pluck the flowers to ease his anxiety on approaching Midoriko, who was running across the ground, only to throw them away on the ground, when he exchanged glances with her.

Mother…make me a cloud so I can shield Midoriko from all of the hurt in the world. 

A firm voice echoed his ears. 

“Did Kitsu send you over this time…”

Quickly, Kirinmaru reached for the brightest yellow flower in the field, forcefully plucking it from the ground, only feeling the softness of her hand as she reached for that flower, too. Her cheeks were flushed from the running, and that sparkle in her eyes resulted in Kirinmaru tripping onto the ground.  

“I am fine…” he gasped as Midoriko stared at his softening gaze, his hands trying to protect that little yellow flower, cradling it like a precious child in his arms.

I must withhold my advances to her.

I must make her feel safe with me.

She did not care if her face was marred by the dirt or her hands scarred by the thorns, for she reached her hand to Kirinmaru. “What compelled you to that little flower, Nishi…”

“It is as beautiful as you….”

Kirinmaru swallowed quietly, only placing that small flower into her long hair. “I…I…” Midoriko knelt on the ground quietly, listening. “I wish I could die yours, and be bloomed into a field so majestic again, so you could take every part of me and wear it on your brow…”

Midoriko shook her head, pulling the sleeve of his kosode. “Well, that seems bleak…” she said, preening that little flower unto her hair. “Nishi…perhaps…for a change…instead of thinking what is past, think of what is present….”

Kirinmaru’s lips pursed a little at her stillness, with that aroma of pine consuming him like incense on an altar.

“Oh….”

“Look, we have no trips to slay youkais, so you can relax, Nishi…” 

Midoriko found herself squeezing Kirinmaru’s hand, and instead decided to run away from Kirinmaru in glee. “I bet your legs are numb sitting down in the soil of the fields…”

Kirinmaru found himself smiling at these words, finding himself to be like a child in that garden again before it burned into ash. “If you say so…” He forced himself to get up and quickly tried to catch Midoriko. He found his heart racing in that field, pursuing that wild figure, trying to catch up to her phase.

Aromas of the field, and of Midoriko, mingled in his nostrils, compelling him to pick up Midoriko’s running. Suddenly, he saw Midoriko landing herself unto the floor of the field, at which blood swirled through his nostrils. Instead of winces, Midoriko found herself giggling, with stray seeds strewn in her hair.

“Priestess, you are wild….I think you are possessed…”

Kirinmaru found himself pressing his palms unto his knees, with his breath hitched. Midoriko shrugged her shoulders, unaware that his stamina was low. “No, I am not; I have always been attuned to nature since I was a child…” she said, allowing Kirinmaru to sit down with her. “It allowed me to be myself, Nishi; perhaps I am too similar to you…” 

Midoriko quietly leaned her head onto his shoulder, forcing her reiki not to spike at his wistful gaze. The gaze of my goddess, who danced upon my fields. Kirinmaru found Midoriko vulnerable and beautiful as she made imaginary plaits with her long wild hair, brushing off the petals from the strands. 

“May I ask you a question…Midoriko?” Kirinmaru curled his lip, inquiring of his personal goddess. “Do you see yourself as divine? I mean, the villagers could mistake your beauty…”

“No…I am always either sanctified or villainized…depending who you ask,” Midoriko smiled wistfully to Kirinmaru. “But I will not be anybody’s moral centre…” She pushed the plants away and found herself shivering at the sound of Kirinmaru’s breath slowing down after their run. 

Midoriko forced herself to grin at the sight of Kirinmaru, a strange man who could be mistaken as a deity of nature. “You might be mistaken…Nishi…I am the servant to them; do not sanctify me…” 

His gaze seemed sincere, as if promising himself not to shape Midoriko as a divine human.

“Oh…I learnt it the hard way. Gods can be so cruel, but you…you…” Midoriko found her heart racing after this confession of hers. 

Why did I say something stupid to him?

Before Kirinmaru could muster the courage to kiss her sweetly by the cheek, their eyes widened to see Kitsu staring at them coldly, at their hands intertwining in the fields. “I knew it,” she said. “Come on, Mii-chan…Nishi…we should get going…” Kitsu quickly snatched Midoriko from his hands. ”Mii-chan you have your rest…” she added, throwing Midoriko her sandals, quiver, and bow. “You should have used that time to do some practice targets upon these annoying birds and unsuspecting men…”

“Oh…Oh yes...” Midoriko shook off all of the plants that clung to her body, her girlish expression changed to someone somber. ”We should come back to that field, Kitsu-chan. I think it is a nice place to stretch our legs…And, should we go to a festival, if we pass one…Kitsu-chan…”

Kitsu chuckled to herself. “Up to you, and strange! I should be the one asking, Mii-chan…”

Kitsu glared at Kirinmaru coldly as he quickly grabbed the flowers in his hands, twisting them into his hair, and face red from embarrassment. “Come on, you idiot, blushing like a virgin—it makes me ill, Nishi…”

“Sorry…” Kirinmaru heaved to himself, trying to get over that fuzzy feeling from Midoriko walking seriously to their next destination. “Midoriko is…”

Kitsu drawled to Kirinmaru, ignoring his stuttering. “Like every man…” She rolled her eyes at the change in Midoriko’s demeanour. “She is beautiful; she should bear your child; she should be a heavenly servant to call you…” Midoriko lovingly pushed Kitsu away, making herself walk by Kirinmaru’s side, mirroring his gait.

“Hurry up!!” Kitsu called. “If you daydream, Nishi, you could lose your way.”

Midoriko chirped to Kitsu. “Be nice to him, Kitsu-chan! He is probably the first man to actually not ask me for favours, and his words are sweet…” 

Instead of being comforted by Midoriko’s words, Kitsu puffed her cheeks in anger, walking away from the sight of Midoriko and Kirinmaru. “As if ordained by you, Lady Midoriko…then I will be fine…” 

Kirinmaru shivered at Kitsu mumbling under her breath. He could just barely make out the words coming out of her mouth. 

Please help that stupid man out and Midoriko to not fall over heels for him.

Midoriko gave his hand a squeeze. “Do not mind Kitsu’s grumpiness; she really cares about me, as I do about…” Before she could finish her statement, Kirinmaru quietly kissed Midoriko gently on the cheek, closing his eyes to savour her aroma of pine and ash. For that moment Kirinmaru found himself not caring about Kitsu’s words, and instead focused on her, savouring that kiss.

Midoriko found herself biting her tongue in shock, forcing herself to smile amidst Kitsu’s scowl. 

“What…”

Kirinmaru stuck his tongue a little. “Sorry…we better hold our lust before Kitsu becomes angry with me, suspecting that I would squeeze your…” Biting his tongue, thanks Kitsu, He nearly speak the word crotch out of his lips, which he could be easily blend in with the male villagers that past by their way, but that is not of his nature. Instead these words blurted in his mouth “Never mind…I….Should we keep on moving Midoriko…” he said, digging his nails into his hair. The tips of his ears reddened with embarrassment and his eyebrows furrowed, regretting that he did not kiss her on the lips.

“Agreed…” Midoriko nodded her head furiously, though she did like that kiss on the cheek.

A/N: A little breather from an otherwise crazy Nue story, I do want to give you guys a little break :)

I seriously do love writing Kitsu’s sass, she is just delightful and yes I listen a lot of Dog Days are over and Free to get that fun atmosphere.

Shoutout for Serial for that idea, as it is so cute <3

Chapter Text

Chapter 5: Make me perfect, make me your fantasy

What have I done to myself? Midoriko pouted, thinking about that moment in the field, touching the cheekbone where Kirinmaru laid his lips on her. What is wrong with Nishi? I thought he was alright after we ran in the field. She observed Kirinmaru constantly rubbing his hands on the leaves in the field, allowing the herbal smell to fill his nostrils, and averting Kitsu’s gaze.

Well, Kitsu-chan is pouting even more than ever. Did Nishi provoke her…

To a certain extent, Midoriko felt sorry for Kirinmaru; perhaps she spoke too much during their time in that field. That he should belong in the field, as a nature deity, rather than to be a human struggling to comprehend words, walking alongside her. 

Kitsu nudged Midoriko calmly, passing her a piece of dried squid in her hands. “Stop daydreaming, Mii-chan…Nishi is fine. We only keep him around because he's smart."

“It seems that,” Kitsu continued, “unlike you, when you spoke with Nishi in the field, you seemed vulnerable…did he wax poetry in your mind by the moonlight, Lady Midoriko…”

Midoriko puffed her cheeks a little.

“Look, I jest, Mii-chan.” Kitsu swung her fans out, catching the rays of the sun. “I am just not crazy about the fact that he went soft after your so-called imitate talk at the fields…” 

“Well, Nishi meant no harm to me; maybe he should…well…” Midoriko saw Kirinmaru beginning to cover his nose, limping at the side. “Hey…are you alright…” 

Kirinmaru pressed his lips, glancing miserably at Midoriko. He mumbled under his breath, “Midoriko…that smell…I…” He accidentally leaned his head onto her chest to hear the gentle hum of her heartbeat. Midoriko felt a shiver down her spine, reluctantly pushing him away, only to see him sulking at that loss of that perfect sound. 

Midoriko glared at him. “Go easy…I…” 

Kirinmaru huffed a little at that action, forcing himself to walk with them. A metallic aroma penetrated the air, at which Midoriko quickly took out her arrows and bow, moving it back and forth for a suspected youkai attack. “Kitsu-chan…” she murmured, her reiki pulsing back and forth over that pathway as they stepped upon a pool of blood, and fog blinded their visions.

That smell.

She knew it too well.

Was it?

No.

Kitsu quickly popped holy salt in her mouth, gritted her teeth, and held her fans tightly to slay any demon.  “Mii-chan…you know, I have the creeps around this area…” They did not even look at Kirinmaru, who was heaving in pain, and coughing violently at the smell of blood. A squelching sound rattled their ears, and they gazed upon a young lady in the finest makeup staring vacantly to the sky. 

The pulse of Midoriko’s reiki grew wild at that sight. She took steady breaths, unaware of Kirinmaru’s body writhing in pain. “Agreed…” She quietly walked over that corpse to see men and noble ladies, all strewn with blood. “We better move quickly...if...we are to have the chance to escape…” Kitsu gave Midoriko another mask to cover her mouth from the aroma. 

“Well shit…this does not look like an attack from local bandits,” Kitsu commented. “They cannot be that clever…”

Midoriko did not even look at Kirinmaru shivering at the river of half-rotten corpses, only to hear a grave voice. 

“May the gods be praised…” Midoriko quickly took her arrow and shot at the source of the voice. A loud thump rattled both girls, and they saw an old man with a top knot wearing a grey kosode and hakama bowing down at them. “They brought us a saviour…” His eyes glanced over Kirinmaru, whose body writhed in pain from the metallic aroma. 

His eyes blinked at the old man. “You seem well-off, young man,” the older man said, “based on the clothes you wear…” 

Kirinmaru quickly gripped the sleeve of his kosode. “No…I…I…” 

The old man gave a soft sigh as Kirinmaru collapsed on the floor, and quietly squatted down to touch his forehead. “Too bad…I…”

Kitsu glared at Kirinmaru, who was still heaving in pain over the aroma. “Hey old man, can you explain what the hell is going on here?”

The old man calmly heaved to himself. “It seems that saviour is a weakling…” he replied, shrugging his shoulders. “Based on your looks, demon slayer…I think I have to trust you and the priestess.” Kitsu nearly wanted to choke the life force of this old man, but she bit her tongue, knowing Midoriko’s displeasure regarding that idea.

“Come; may I get you some tea…and warm blankets for the night…” the old man calmly queued the trio to a safe passage, away from the river of corpses. “I will tell you along the way…oh, I am Gaishi, if it pleases you.” 

Kitsu wrung her arms to lift Kirinmaru up. “Come, Nishi! Get up, you idiot; by the rate of your breathing, you are going to make Mii-chan worried about you…”

Kirinmaru did not reply, for his mind was overwhelmed by that horrid sight.

////

Kirinmaru found himself lying on the ground, where the pathway of half-rotten nobles gripped him like the waves on a rickety ship. One of the nobles called him, a young girl in the brightest of silks: “I am expecting you, my love. I am ready…” 

Kirinmaru shook his head. 

“No...I am betrothed to another person…Sunako-sama…” Kirinmaru gently pushed her gentle hand away, to have his clothes stained with blood. “You have to live a life alone, my lady…I…” He looked over that face again, and somehow, it looked like Midoriko herself. He quickly closed his eyes, and wrote the kanji for ‘clean’ to calm his nerves. 

Another voice called him. “What a fool! She is the vassal of your lineage, and you reject one that is fair and beautiful? Is it because she bleeds…” A servant scowled at Kirinmaru, streaking his hands with the blood from his mistress. “She would treat you well…” The aroma of blood consumed Kirinmaru so horribly that he wished to run away from the sea of noble ladies, clawing for his handsome body.

Well, can you see me?

That voice seemed so clear. Kirinmaru frowned a little; he knew that voice so well, and quickly, he ran away from the sea of corpses to see a man, lean and strong. He stared at the young Kirinmaru. “Did I disappoint you?” Kirinmaru bowed to his father-Koushirou. “That I rejected that woman…I…I…” That man did not reply to him, only Kirinmaru to be consumed by the sea of young ladies bathed in blood. 

“You did…I will never…never…”

/////

The sound of a thunder clap echoed in Kirinmaru’s ears, and Kirinmaru forced himself to take a whiff of his new surroundings, only to hear murmurs between Gaishi and the two girls. He cracked his neck a little, forcing himself to find Midoriko’s scent, but to no avail. 

“Apologies for my rudeness, young ladies,” Gaishi said. “I hope this place is comfortable for you…”

Kitsu chuckled to Gaishi.  “We have stayed in worse places. Right now, this hut feels like paradise, so I am guessing that you have indeed buried many bodies like that…”

“Yes…” Gaishi replied. “It is a shortcut known by us, to be where young ladies travelled with their companions by the palanquins….” Gaishi shuffled himself comfortably to the nearby cupboard to take out the dusty futons, beating them with a stick, allowing the dust to dance in the air. “To reach their betrothed…sometimes I could imagine that one day, they would enjoy the security of this place, only to be slaughtered the next.”

Kirinmaru could deduce what had happened: these ladies—like him, supposed to meet their consorts—had negotiated with the people at court for the artificial happiness of the couple, whenever it was compelled by the forces of love, or mere coincidence.

He knew that too well, based on the horse riding session with Sunako, that she would drink every part of him, if she had the chance.

But the young ladies seem to be bound by something horrible; they do not have songs to sing or stories to be told.

The blood, not hunted by beasts foul, or men cruel to seek its treasures…but…

He found his repressed yoki screaming with hate and yet…

Fear…

Fear…

Gaishi smiled a little. “You know, Priestess and Demon slayer…” he said, unaware that Kirinmaru was laying on the wooden floor miserably, staring at the decaying mushrooms and the wilted water lily bulbs in the stagnant pond, perfuming Gaishi’s hut with a nauseating aroma alongside the metallic aroma from the passageways. “Are you sure that you wanted to walk these pathways alone? I mean, I do not doubt your skills…but…what are you going to do…the…” he asked, passing Midoriko a warm cup of tea. “Oh I forgot, I made this…” Gaishi smiled quietly, placing a chipped cup of tea into Kitsu’s hands. “For your friend…”

Midoriko mumbled quietly to Kitsu. “Maybe later…” and placed her cup of hot tea outside Kirinmaru’s room. 

Kitsu shook her head, watching the raindrops slowly fall down on the platform, washing away the smell of blood with the soothing aroma of ozone. “I do not know what that thing is; I don’t think someone that powerful can kill these people. There has to be a link between the unmarried noble ladies and the timing…” She felt little pricks in her body and forced herself to sit down on the floor. Kitsu clawed the fat in her cheek.

“You know what…” Midoriko asked. “Do you think…that…” 

Kitsu rotated her ankles back and forth. “The noble ladies have their bleeds…which automatically is an easy way for their parents to get them married because it is a signal to bear children…” Her lips curled to an unpleasant smile. “I hate this, to be honest. Could they have the freedom to choose what they want…”

Midoriko felt that anger, too, along with Kitsu, gripping her hand tightly to ease her anger. These young girls, clueless about the perils of the outside world, walking into that world, cruel to their kind

An idea planted in Kitsu’s mind, and she grinned cheekily. “Then we have to see if it is true…” She whispered into Midoriko’s ear about her plan.

“Me as a noble lady??” Midoriko exclaimed quietly. “I?? No…”

Kirinmaru glanced at Midoriko, who was chewing her lip a little. “I…I…” He could feel Midoriko’s reiki spiking back and forth. That pain writhed his body, still from the metallic aroma, and he quickly took that cup of tea, and drank it quietly. 

“Why can’t it be Nishi?” Midoriko asked. “His face could pass as a woman’s…”

“It could work,” Kitsu replied, “but you can see, he is hapless…and I feel safer if he plays the role of the servant...as your…” Kitsu bit the edge of the kosode, and made a loose ponytail for Midoriko, preening the cowlicks gently. “Plus, he does not bleed as we do…unless, of course, that youkai is really dumb…you are a much better candidate because you can least defend yourself with your reiki whenever…” Kitsu sighed. “The thing is that I have to convince that old geezer that if he has any clothes from the corpses, to wash them, because in all honesty, we have none that scream ‘I am rich and well off’, especially for you…”

“We are not taking the Prince’s gift…” Midoriko furrowed her eyebrows, forcing herself to heave over the thought that she had to wear many layers and place rouge on her lips. “I…I…”

Kitsu rolled her lips. “Afraid not; we need a better occasion for these robes. This shit does not come cheap, and this is not one of those times…” Quickly, Kitsu looked over the moon veiled by the dark clouds. “Plus….we do not have much time; like, I want to get out of this place alive…”

Kirinmaru quietly came out, with his mouth pouting a little. ”I also want to get out of here…” He shuffled to Midoriko’s side, leaning his head onto her shoulder, reaching his hand to her taut stomach. Suddenly Midoriko gave a loud belch which startled Kirinmaru and Kitsu, and she used her reiki to push him away. 

“WHAT THE HELL NISHI, WHY DID YOU…”

“Go easy Nishi…” Kitsu quickly pointed the blade of her fans to the edge of Kirinmaru’s throat. “Just because you got Mii-chan’s favour does not mean you may lay your hands on her body…” Kirinmaru stared at Midoriko, pouting at that touch. “I am sorry…I…do not know what overcame me…”

Midoriko found her stomach twisted in pain. “I…I…am…fine…” she found herself stuttering at Kirinmaru’s confession. “Just leave me alone…” Kitsu quietly shielded Midoriko to her side, giving soft rubs to her shoulder, wiping away the tears in her eyes. Gaishi gingerly opened the door, Midoriko hiding her eyes away from Kirinmaru. “Sorry for the intrusion…”

“Excuse me for the commotion…” Gaishi said. “Priestess and demon slayer, I believe you three must be famished…can one of you take the meals…it is not much, but I hope it will tide you through the whole evening…”

Midoriko stared at Gaishi, wiping the tears pricking in her eyes. “We have….names…I am…Midoriko…and my friends…are...Kitsu and Nishi…” The old man trembled over Midoriko’s authoritative voice. “It would be best that you give us the utmost respect…” 

“Yes…Lady Midoriko…”

Quietly, Midoriko excused herself from that matter, not looking at the duo.  “You should have asked Nishi…” Kitsu said, withholding the bile building up in her throat. “You must feel better now, because you breathed in a woman’s scent….”

Kirinmaru shook his head, feeling shame in his bones, eyes wide, staring into space. Kitsu hissed under gritted teeth. “Forget it, Nishi…” she said, observing the waterlily bulbs droop down at the edge of the leaking pot. ”Anyway, I am thinking of going over the next night to that passageway if that geezer’s words are right and that thing hungers for a woman’s life force…”

“And I think I need you, Nishi, for Mii-chan’s sake,” Kitsu added. “I hate to admit it…but I think you know court duties better than I do….like I could simply dress as a boy, and hide the salves to kill the youkai, but you, I need you to introduce yourself as the minister for Midoriko…” 

Kirinmaru quietly leaned on the floor, listening to Kitsu’s plan intently. “We need to somehow convince whoever is around to let us through as Midoriko is about to be betrothed to someone powerful…” she added, splaying her fingers over her eyes with one hand. “I need ideas…now…” 

He felt Kitsu’s ire, even as Midoriko came into the dilapidated room, carrying warm rice balls and soup to eat, placing it quietly on the floor. 

“Itadakimasu…”

Midoriko clapped her hands in prayer, focusing on that simple moment. Kitsu and Kirinmaru followed suit on that matter, with Kitsu quickly grabbing the onigiri and stuffing it in her mouth. Kirinmaru smiled quietly. “Can you thank the old man for giving us a warm meal…”

Midoriko did not reply to Kirinmaru, forcing herself to hurriedly drink the hot soup. However, the warm contents made her stomach churn a little, so she gave a bow to Kirinmaru and Kitsu. 

“Give me a while…the air is stiled, and I…desperately want to go out…” 

“Hey…I will accompany you…” Kitsu slowly pushed herself up, holding Midoriko’s hand. “Nishi, just stay behind and check on the old man; maybe he could give us some pointers on what is to come…”

Kirinmaru smelt a slight change in her aroma; instead of the crispness of the forest, there was an unusual note of blood. And it made him feel sick. 

////

“...You must be Nishi…”

Gaishi heaved loudly as he carried a beautiful palanquin alone. “Could I get some help, young man…”  Kirinmaru quickly opened the door to admire its carvings and lush silks dictating a high status. Quietly, Kirinmaru managed to pull the palanquin in, forcing himself to sit on it. He imagined a young girl shielded from the cages of her palace, entering the lands where her hands are laid upon to whom she is betrothed: perhaps it could be a cunning kitsune or a drunken warlord. 

She would never know.

Kirinmaru thought to himself of the last moments of that occupant, the young woman whose eyes were shielded from the cruelty in her world. And that world was so heavy in his heart. Kirinmaru allowed Gaishi to sit down at that spot. “Yes…thank you for the meal…”

“You are blessed by the gods that you are given the spirit of a male…” Gaishi mumbled at him. “Women are troublesome creatures; as soon the sheets are stained with her blood, we need to spirit her away…”

Blood?

“And these greedy noblemen, in hopes for an heir, wanted that more…” Gaishi grinned bleakly at him. “You seem like a virile man…why are you not married?” Kirinmaru shook his head, having to disclose the secret, staring at the darkening clouds. 

Quietly, Kirinmaru found the robes of a noblewoman, cradling the silks like a mother to a child, barely making out the old man’s story finding the bloodied robes with the young girl laying down in her carrier, eyes vacant for the gods to look kindly on her sacrifice.

How beautiful. Kirinmaru thought to himself. A fantasy burned in his mind of Midoriko as he slipped himself into the woman’s robes, admiring the shimmering silks, swaying his arms a little to imaginary music. However his repressed yoki screamed over the smell of blood that was left from the woman, and he tossed them down violently, only to see Kitsu and Midoriko approaching, exhausted from their walk.

“Nishi…what the hell…”

Kirinmaru did not look at them, only allowing Gaishi to quickly take the robes, who was barely looking at Kitsu. “Kitsu-sama, the robes…” Old Gaishi bowed to Kitsu. “They seem to be in good shape…for the priestess Lady Midoriko.” She cradled the silks that once covered a young girl’s body, her tongue biting from rage over a death that was meaningless, all because men saw her as a vassal for potential heirs. 

Why do women, when they bleed, become trinkets, only to be tossed aside?

“If I could get a chance, I would use my fingers and break the neck of every male suitor and minister for seeing us women as nothing but mothers! They themselves are birthed by them; it  does not mean we can choose to live our lives as them…”

Midoriko sighed to herself, clapping her hands in a prayer. She quietly whispered to Kitsu, “We will avenge them, Kitsu-chan…” She too, trembled at that sight. “Let’s get them clean…”

Kitsu wiped the tears from her eyes, gritting her teeth. Kirinmaru heard the rumble in the clouds, haunted by the sight of the women strewn with a strange aroma of blood on their bodies. 

His heart grew heavy on that matter, and he sat down passively, covering his eyes with one palm.

“Sorry, Nishi…” Kitsu grinned calmly. “I know you think that it is horrible, but we do not have much of a choice…”

“Hate to admit it, but I do need your help. Do you know anything about processions…”  

Kirinmaru swallowed his fear, only recalling images of horror in his youth. His father standing indifferently in the drawing room, caressing the lips of his new wife, her belly ripe with child. The daiyoukais looked with approval on that prosperous marriage, his father Koushirou’s face gaunt but his eyes staring firmly to them.  A secret must consume Koushirou’s, even it is out of pure defiance.

“I could try…” Kirinmaru spoke calmly. “Our friend found the palanquin alongside the robes, which you will be wearing…” The old man huffed, pushing the palanquin to Kitsu and Midoriko’s side, allowing Kirinmaru to pull it through. “There was one… if only the priestess could clean it…” Midoriko felt a prickling in her reiki observing the state of it, like she nearly wanted to throw up and weep. Instead, she held it under her breath. 

Kirinmaru quietly gripped her hand, rubbing small circles around the fleshy parts of her thumb. 

However, Midoriko pushed him away, her eyebrows furrowed with determination, clapping her hands in prayer.

We would wage holy war for you…even as we watched your vacant eyes reaching towards heaven.

“Let us be, Nishi. Kitsu-chan, prepare what salves to come. We will move tonight…” Both girls quickly took the robes given by the kindly old man, and proceeded to the next room. Strangely, Kirinmaru felt a change in Midoriko's reiki, a rage that could consume a forest and she would not bat an eye at such carnage. 

Kirinmaru found himself pacing the room back and forth, glancing at the old man. “I hate it, but these women are even braver than all of the mercenaries in the field. No one dared to save them,” he said, forcing himself to clean the palanquin.

“I believe so…”

////////

Candlelight seems to bathe both girls; they were solemn over the sudden revelation. 

Kitsu quickly took off her kosode.  “Do not worry, we will be alright…” she said, biting the old rags given to them by the old man. She bound her breasts, looking over at Midoriko, who was stripping down her priestess gear to change into the noble clothing, and shivering over the cold. 

“I do not know about Nishi. He seems to rub the nape of his neck a lot…like he is disturbed by this activity.”

Midoriko did not reply as she settled herself comfortably in a quiet corner, with the shell containers of makeup and impoverished brushes at her side. She settled her reiki upon that matter, allowing the girls to speak again.

Kirinmaru glimpsed Midoriko through the crack of the door. She was shaking like a leaf as she layered rouge thickly on her lips with her finger from the shell given to her by Kitsu. Her eyes stared firmly at that polished metal, feeling rage and peace in her heart, as she dusted her teeth to be black as night. 

Impulsively, Kirinmaru rushed over to Midoriko’s side, and his hand slowly clasped onto her shoulder. 

God, she is beautiful.

“You seem frightened.”

Kirinmaru forced himself to withhold his detection of her sweet aroma. “What do you know about that…” Midoriko hissed to herself. “Your mind is filled with tales; I am here to give these girls’ souls their peace.”

Reluctantly, she tied her long hair into a loose ponytail, not daring to speak to Kirinmaru. Kitsu quietly picked up Midoriko’s hand. “Nishi, stop lingering. We do not have the time…”

The touch of her hand consumed Kirinmaru like an endless flame. He wanted to hold it again, though he tried not to show it.

Midoriko quietly cast over the paper dolls to make them into servants for her. “Sometimes we fight wars more than men do in battles…” Kitsu quietly pressed into Midoriko’s shoulder. “Nishi, now is not the time to daydream…” She looked so different with her hair tucked into her hat, and her chest flat to imitate a man’s, as she passed him a set of robes.

“Take this, and meet us outside of the hut….”

Kirinmaru nodded to himself.

“Yes…”

He saw the backs of the two ladies, his eyes trailing to Midoriko, for she had the strength of a warrior that fought many battles.

///

Quietly, Gaishi escorted the trio, with Midoriko feeling a sharp pain in her stomach, but she withheld it like a queen. “Be on your guard…” Kitsu felt the burn of the salt in her mouth. “Even if you can overcome that long run…” She watched as the paper dolls Midoriko placed on the floor transfigured into two beautifully dressed servants with handsome faces, staring at the bloody road indifferently. “We do not know what is to come…”

“Nishi, do you have a name in mind for Midoriko? Well, she is supposed to be a noble…” Kitsu watched Midoriko crawl into the palanquin, her breaths steady and calm, anticipating the dangers to come.

A name planted in his mind. 

Yurika-sama.

Kirinmaru called out Midoriko’s false name. “Make way for Yurika-sama! Make way for Yurika-sama…” Kitsu held her breath, and Gaishi bowed down to them, praying to the gods of fortune to guide them to their path.

And Gaishi, like a father watching his daughter being spirited away to the hands of those who received Midoriko as their beautiful bride.

They too disappeared into the deep forest of no return.

Midoriko did not dare to look at the blood-streaked corpses of the women that passed their way. Kitsu whispered into Kirinmaru’s ear, “I do not like this…” The air felt stale, and the world seemed to be in suspense. Salt burned her tongue like the raging flame in her belly; she wished to take all of the poison salves to kill those who reap.

A projection came in, holding the lantern, giving a serene smile to them.

Quietly, that projection pointed to Kirinmaru. They wore the most beautiful of the silks, and it was definitely once the robe of a wandering noble princess as lost as them. He quietly cued the bearers, and Kitsu to bowed down to that projection. “You must be weary…”

Kirinmaru swallowed his fear to hold his ground. “Yes we are, we are lost… and appreciate a place for a night.” He even covered his face onto the ground, his mind stabilising to Midoriko’s sweet scent; however, there was an unusual metallic note that he shivered upon smelling.

“Our master will be pleased…” 

Kirinmaru found his stomach twisting over that change of that aroma. Did someone get stabbed in the woods and be strewn to the dead?

No? 

Wait?

Kitsu quickly caught the paper dolls that once served Midoriko and stuffed them under her kosode. However, Midoriko found herself wobbling back and forth at the scene, only holding Kitsu tightly.

“Kitsu-chan…the…”

Kitsu gritted her teeth. “Hold on… you will be fine…I think Nishi knew what he was doing; if not, we just have to follow what he said…” She passed Midoriko a small cube of sugar, placing it on her tongue. “Do you feel anything, because that messager gives me the creeps?”

Calmly the projection spoke to Kirinmaru: “My lord, what took you far to these woods…”

“Marriage, she is a daughter of a powerful lord, and our house is in ruins…” Kirinmaru mumbled to himself. “His palace is far, and that poor girl is nervous…” The projection giggled at him.

“How pitiful…perhaps you should bring her to our master; they know how to teach those buds…” The projection slowly touched the closed flowers, one of which bloomed an unusual shape, streaked in blood. “Ahhh somewhere, someone has bloomed…” W ho bloomed? Kirinmaru thought to himself, only to be greeted by a sea of young maidens passing him all of the drinks, crowning him with strange flowers, stripping off the old clothes, and calling him lord, which made Kitsu angry when she felt a barrier between them.

“I wonder why Nishi was chosen...” 

Kitsu gritted her teeth as she pushed herself to the barrier, only to feel aftershocks in her body. “Huh, I think we cannot get in…” Midoriko weakly waved her hands to disperse the barrier, to transfigure it to a beautiful palace, decorated with the finest of silk lanterns, and giggling servants at every pathway. 

“Easy…”

Kitsu squatted in front, passing through the guards, unaware of their deception, laying salves to dissolve their bodies into pools of blood, at which Midoriko found herself nauseated. Kitsu raised an eyebrow, swinging her body to her shoulders. “Mii-chan, you are scaring me…” 

Midoriko used her reiki to stabilise herself. “No worries…I will be fine… we need to find Nishi… he could be anywhere…” 

“True…” 

Kitsu held her breath. The aroma was too intoxicating, so she put on the masks, first to herself then to Midoriko who took hurried breaths, to block away the thick miasma covering this palace. “Do you think Nishi can survive this shit?”

///

“Welcome…” A sing-song voice echoed in Kirinmaru’s ears as the projection entertained him with the finest of rice wines and tastiest of foods, of which he greedily grabbed whatever came to him. “Welcome… Welcome…” Kirinmaru found himself overwhelmed by the shimmering sights of women in rapturous dance, men singing songs to their strange master. Blearily, he glanced over at an androgynous being wearing a haori of peonies on their back. 

“You seem interesting; may I lead you into the most lovely of onsens…” They watched Kirinmaru rub his eyes, slightly tipsy from the many drinks offered by the sea of relentless servants. “...you seem tired…” 

They clapped their hands, allowing the servants to disappear into thin air.

“Perhaps it will soothe you, all of the pains and the sufferings in the world….”

Kitsu nearly held her breath, glancing at the stagnant pond with lilies growing so brightly smelling like slaughtered animals. “Why is Nishi so stupid as to follow the master…” she wondered, scrambling around the now-vacant dining room, with the skeletons of its previous occupants all dressed in the finest gears. She took a small dagger from one of the hapless ministers and tucked it under her bandages. “If we are not careful, we could be joining that god-awful feast for eternity.” 

Midoriko did not speak, for an overwhelming pain consumed her. “...Yes…” Quietly she swung her hands, forming a monstrous black wolf howling at sight. 

Run.

Kitsu grinned quietly. “Hashi, it has been a while, old friend…lead us to Nishi…” she said, while quickly passing a woman’s robes to Midoriko. Quietly, Hashi bathed them like the clear streams of water, letting them pass through the eyes of those who resided here. Midoriko gripped Kitsu’s hand tightly, withholding her heavy breathing. 

“Hey, are you alright?”

Midoriko withheld her anger, smiling at Kitsu. “Do not worry, Hashi will hold us…we have to keep focused…”

Calmly, both girls descended to the edge of the onsen, where sakura blossoms made a sickly aroma for the girls. Kitsu donned a mask to cover her face, then offered one to Midoriko. “Huh… it leads us somewhere serene…” Hashi quickly descended into the still waters of the onsen under Midoriko’s command, with Kitsu biting the blade of the dagger, watching Kirinmaru stripping to his bare self, peering over the cold moon. 

“It feels suspicious…” Kitsu withheld herself, seeing the reflection of the conversation. Unknowingly, Midoriko bit her tongue, averting her gaze from his taut muscles, and the water droplets dribbling upon his chest. She found her heart racing over that sight. 

“What is going on…”

Midoriko shook her head, pushing Kitsu down to the ground. “Quiet…” Quickly, she pulled away from Hashi into the still waters, watching Kirinmaru dipping himself unto the warm water. His eyes were vacant on the task is to come. “This may be the cause of the girls’ deaths…” 

/////////

A quiet voice echoed in Kirinmaru’s ears sweetly. “A beautiful face…” The figure chuckled ruefully, transforming itself into an androgynous being, dipping themselves into the warm water, to show off a bright design unusual to human eyes. “You know, I could have mistaken you for a woman…”

Kirinmaru withheld a tremble in his lip. 

“…I…never mind…” 

“Why did you travel far…” they asked, allowing Kirinmaru to sit comfortably at the edge of the onsen. 

“I….I am here…to broker peace with another clan….as you see, Lady Yukira-sama will be of no use to us. Our family is down to ruins, and this lady is such a beautiful flower…for she….” 

The figure’s nose flared over that aroma, sprouting a cruel smile in their face.

“Yes…beautiful….” Slowly, they held Kirinmaru’s hand tightly until he felt his knuckles crack. “Though…it would be such a pity that such a flower will wilt with your hands…such a life force so precious that I could use it for myself…” The figure did not flinch at Kirinmaru, the faded flower petals slowly dissolved into streaky entities swarming around the serene waters.

Kirinmaru felt his yoki burning within him, to fight that horrid force, but that entity was not the aim to him. “I wish to pass through this passageway, as quickly as I can…Please…let us…” However, the aroma of blood tinged the onsen, causing Kirinmaru’s heart to race with fear. “...We do…not have the time….master…I…”

The figure stood up from the murky waters, their tattoos on their body doing their strange dance, the snake tattoo transfiguring into a slithering creature. “What beckons…my friend…” they asked, detecting a sweet smile. “Well…well… Fate has brought me something special…and to think I suspected you to be ordinary nobles, with little intention…” The figure quickly moved their hand to reveal two girls hiding behind the rocks, which that creature, aroused by Midoriko’s scent, slowly swarmed her nubile body, as a patch of blood slowly bloomed in the robes. The figure stuck out their tongue, slowly licking her soft jawline. “A foolish man brought you…O powerful priestess…yours…is the tastiest…” 

“Be damned, you will never get me….” Midoriko quietly closed her eyes, reaching for the edge of the onsen. She murmured under her breath. “HASHI!” she shouted, withholding her pain to summon a monstrous black wolf to her side from the hot water, laying its watery paws on her shoulders. “Go….” She found herself heaving loudly, her eyes furrowed with rage, as she used the last of her reiki powers to remove the snakes from her body.

“You are easy to lose…you are weak, priestess…you…are…”

The wolf surrounded the horrid figure, attacking the figure that was trying to claw into Midoriko’s bloodied robes, allowing the snakes to feast upon her bloody flesh. Its fangs coated with crimson liquid. She was slowly fading away into the darkness,her voice cracking at the sight of Kitsu gritting her teeth. “Kitsu-chan….”

Kitsu gave a nod, unaware that Kirinmaru had quickly scampered out of the waters to scoop Midoriko into his arms, pulling her elaborate robe away from the entity’s talons, confused by the smell of blood seeping from her undergarments and onto his hands. Kitsu pulled the dagger from the bound bandages, spewing holy salt onto the tattoos, causing the figure to howl in pain, scratching Kitsu’s face, blood trickling onto her kosode.

Kitsu bit her tongue, thrusting the dagger onto the snakes crawling onto Midoriko’s neck. “Not this day…” Without hesitation, she continuously thrust the dagger back and forth into the youkai back and tossed poisons on its body. Her once pristine kosode was now stained with the entrails of the entity as she pinned them down to the ground with her wrists.

Midoriko weakly mumbled another name: “Susumo…” unaware of Kirinmaru’s racing heartbeat, shivering from the water, as he quickly dressed into the clothes left at the corner, bringing her to a safe spot. “...Destroy….”

The wolf took another form, burning the figure with holy energy, unaware of its screams that echoed the valleys. Quickly, Kitsu rolled out from the scene, seeing the clear water become clouded with their entrails.  They did not even look at the dissolving corpse of the youkai they slew, for the smell of blood nauseated the trio.

And that once serene onsen, became an illusion, like all illusions became mere imagination in their minds. 

//////

Why is she not dead from the blood that spread through her robes? Kirinmaru thought to himself, holding her tightly like a doll. “You are hurt! You are dying! I…need…I need…”

“Put me down…Nishi…I can walk fine…Put me down…”

Every time Midoriko fought Kirinmaru’s arms caving to her body, blood seeped through his fingers, causing a shiver down his spine. Kitsu rolled her eyes at the way his face writhed in agony at her chewing her lip in pain.

“Alright…if you insist, Nishi, though we should bring you, I mean Mii-chan, a healer or some wise old priestess, to alleviate your fears.” Kitsu heaved calmly, her face caked in blood. “For now, I wish to get the hell away from this place…”

Like rats scampering along the rain, away from their home, there was a heaviness in the trio’s hearts, mostly Kirinmaru trying to compose himself from that horrific sight. They soon found a small village lit by fireflies, offering serenity in their hearts.

“HELP! HELP! HELP! The priestess is dying…She is…”

Kirinmaru’s voice grew hoarse from the cries of help over Midoriko’s bleeding. “Help…Help…I need a healer…”

The healer with her hair tied into a neat bun was about to end her day, tidying up her supplies, and stared at the trio bathed by the entrails of something evil emphatically. “...Oh…” Kirinmaru gently dropped Midoriko upon the entrance of the hut. “Please…help…” Kirinmaru bit his tongue, his eyes stung with tears. “I…do not…want…to…” he added, unaware of Midoriko slowly composing herself from the horrid incident.

“Alright…” The healer examined Midoriko’s clothes stained with blood. “Hmm…before I can help you, let me introduce myself. I am Izumi…and based on what happened, you are very welcome to stay in the hut for the night…” 

Kitsu chuckled to herself ruefully. “May I pay you for your kindness? We do have a few mon to spare…” 

Izumi shook her head. “Do not get yourself worked up; I think this young man is very worried for the priestess…do not worry…I will take care of her.” She gently coaxed Midoriko to walk to the futon in the house, unaware of Kirinmaru forcefully rubbing the blood off from his clothes, shutting his eyes on the sight of Midoriko’s blood in his hands, haunted by the words of Arata. 

You are simply a coward…How could you bring a legacy to the world.

“Perhaps it would be best to calm him down, based on his expression? There is a lot to…”

Kitsu accepted Izumi’s advice, pulling Kirinmaru’s bloodied hands to keep him from staying behind the hut. “Come…let’s go to the river. We deserved some respite, Nishi…”

/////

Kitsu nudged him. “What you did is unnecessary…my Midoriko can overcome that….” She forced herself to tie her hair with her bandage, walking to a nearby river, where Kirinmaru impulsively washed his hands back and forth, frightened by the blood clouding the clear stream. 

Her bleeding? How?

This is?

Kitsu allowed him to settle down, glancing at the red streaks floating away into the darkness, seeing his feet caving over the ground. “Oh….in my world….” Kirinmaru chewed his lip, his voice barely audible to the howling wind. “I heard women…well…reabsorb their….and….” 

Kitsu covered her face with her palms, watching him wince at the bloodied clothes on his body. By the spirits, please save that man…. that backwards thought….I…I…

Kitsu sighed to herself, looking at the moon caving to a mere crescent. “Shit, I should have known….”

“…Alright…I am not going to make your heart wait in suspense, for I fear I have to clean up your mess….” Kitsu sat comfortably on the ground, placing the bloodied dagger down. “Look Nishi, women’s bodies follow the tides, and sometimes the phases of the moon will dictate our cycles….” Her two fingers, from each hand gesturing the word ‘cycles’. “Usually mine is on the waxing moon, and Mii-chan on the full moon, but strange…it is….”

It did not ease Kirinmaru’s anxieties at all.

“Never mind, how it goes is that it is supposed to prepare our bodies to bear children. In all honesty, I wish not to bring a child into a world so cruel. Henceforth, if a man does not pour his seed in her, it sheds whatever nutrients needed for the child…”

“But…but…she seems hurt…” Kirinmaru heaved to himself. “I…I…she managed to summon a powerful thing…even when she is….”

Kitsu rolled her eyes. “Then what do you want to do, Nishi? At least you proved your valour that you did not give in to that motherf**ker…” She gave Kirinmaru a pat on the back. “That is admirable…and that Shikigami—Hashi—he is a dear friend of ours. Only Mii-chan has the power to harness his true name; even I cannot do this at a whim compared to her…”

Kirinmaru did not reply to Kitsu’s casual conversation, allowing a pregnant pause in the air.

“Perhaps we shall take a pause in our demon slaying until we can tide over Mii-chan’s bleed…” Kitsu broke a friendly smile to Kirinmaru, breathing in the fresh air. “Let’s head up to the next village after we rest tonight here, and the healer gives us an all-clear.”

/////

A/N: Oh man, oh man, oh man…oh man 

That was a doozy, and I thought that the Nue story was tough to write but this one took a cake for many reasons, one being my health and mental state has been rough due middle of August to Mid september, with work stress and me ironically writing that very topic itself, periods which I suffer the worse round with bad nausea and horrible cramps. (Thankfully I am on the better end, but really messed me up)

It starts with the bouncing of ideas on chats with serial which I do chat about periods briefly, and this one actually propels with that idea of how are we gonna meet with Mayonaka (Yes Mahiruma is coming next and he is my favourite to write as I called him reluctant fairy godmother, not sorry for the spoiler alert 🤣) before I went for an event ‘Kirinmaru feel the bottom part of her stomach, and ask if she bleed and if it is a sacrifice LOL//but Midorkio be like dude you need to chill- I don't want’,” and hers ‘I think so too. He would take her to a healer and be like HELP SHE'S DYING and Midoriko's like PUT ME DOWN I'M FINE’. It is simply an idea of Midoriko struggling with her period in a festival, but IDK I just badly want to make a youkai or entity out of that notion. I swear I rip off the brains of Inuyasha old-school horror to build that thing. 

That topic of periods, a natural process for people who menstruate, how can you handle it in a story that is so engaging and yet normalizes it as a whole? I really have to confront my inner sexism and toxic patriarchal society mentalities on seeing periods as a taboo itself to put these things on paper. I would say Pixar’s Turning Red really built my foundation of it, alongside reading two fanfics to build that idea which are Fawnie’s ‘ Cycle of Change ’ and Sweepingtree ‘ Blood ’, (there is another one I read but I think it is too impartial) to build the perspectives of how mensurating people feel as a whole.

But I suppose in the end, we must actually normalize talking about that body process itself, even if it is uncomfortable. I am so glad for that move as a whole, and we would see the follow-up on that idea in the next chapter, which leads to my question for this story: ‘What topics do you think should be normalized in conversations?”

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷* ˚ ✦ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ˏˋ°•*⁀➷* ˚ ✦ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ˋ°•*⁀➷* ˚ ✦ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ˏˋ°•*⁀➷* ˚ ✦ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

Just a very small update from Cat, from the new year-2023: I wish you a very joyous new year filled with many adventures to come, as we speak- I have written like 4-5 chapters ahead for I want you, but I have yet the time to work on it, as I am on a much juicer bits! I want to thank you all for staying with me throughout this whole story, despite the journey has been difficult. Please take care of yourselves during that time ♥️

Chapter Text

Chapter 5.5: I've been keeping secrets, From my heart and from my soul

Midoriko noticed Kitsu limping a little; she wiped her mouth from the blood that trickled down her throat. “Kitsu-Chan…”

Kitsu gave a chuckle. “I hate that because I am a woman, they thought I could not slay a demon…” She forced herself to sit on the grass, covering her face in shame, tears spilling onto her hands. “Hell, I have received longer gashes than those cowardly men did…”

“They are cowards! They are cowards…” Kitsu cried as Midoriko held her tightly, carding her fingers through Kitsu’s hair, staying silent amidst her angry tears. The blood from the long fight stained her white kosode. 

“Kitsu-chan, you are strong, you are brave…” Midoriko smiled calmly, forcing herself to wipe the tears from her eyes. “I…I…”

“I wish there was a way we could prove them wrong…” Kitsu hissed to herself. “When I chose to be a demon slayer, it was to help the weak, not to be mocked because of my sex…” 

Midoriko swallowed her anger for her friend, bile burning in her throat. She was trained by the older mikos to learn restraint and poise, but this burnt her like a raging fire. Calmly Midoriko held Kitsu’s hand, keeping a stiff upper lip. “Then we must…” Her hand subconsciously touched a small puddle, and it formed something horrid that dissolved into a patch of grass. Kitsu’s hand covered her mouth, the once-flowing blood becoming caked in her teeth. 

“Wow….”

Kitsu heaved a breath. “Mii-chan…since when you could do this…” 

Midoriko frowned a little at that revelation. “I do not know; I have always felt that….”

That.

Amidst the darkness, a black wolf slowly peered at the girls before disappearing into the blackness. Kitsu gritted her teeth. “That wolf…perhaps that is why we fight….” 

Midoriko chewed her lip, closing her eyes to feel the racing in her body—forming a wolf out of the still waters, its paws burning the blades of grass.

Serendipity filled both girls following the wolf’s graceful steps. Kitsu reached out her hand to pet the back of the wolf. “You are fast indeed…” A name soon planted in her mind. “Hashiru…no, Hashi…to run…” 

Midoriko quietly settled herself down with timed breaths. “What do you think?...” she asked, clutching her knees tightly with her hands as she watched the wolf dissolve into the puddles of water, only leaving burn marks in the ground.

“What do you think…” Kitsu chuckled to herself. “Mii-chan, you made Hashi, whom people would fear…but which could be something to protect…”

//// 

Midoriko constantly rubbed her eyes, glancing at Izumi the healer, calmly pressing her fingers to Midoriko’s wrist. “Good morning, Midoriko-sama…”

“Morning…” Midoriko glanced at Kirinmaru’s head leaning on the rough wall; Izumi crouched down to her level. “Your male companion…was it Nishi…came in last night…and insisted that he wanted to take care of you, instead of me…but he ended up falling asleep, I suppose.” A blush crept along Midoriko’s face as Izumi slowly shook Kirinmaru out of his slumber to pass him a small bowl of miso soup to drink. Izumi chided to Midoriko quietly “Midoriko-sama, I know you are a powerful priestess, but your health is so important… I wish you not to push your limits…”

“I know…”

Kirinmaru pouted at Midoriko’s reaction to him as she turned away, the blood stain between her legs spread like a gentle stream, wincing at her pain, focusing on the cloudy reflection in the miso soup. Midoriko covered her face with shame. “I wonder if there is relief for us women…but…” 

Izumi clasped her hand gently. “There will never be. I suppose it is the gods’ fate, but we can do what we can with our mere hands, so it will be alright.”

Midoriko grimaced at that thought.

Perhaps there is beauty and hate in this world. I suppose I could live with it.

Calmly Kitsu came into the hut, pushing Kirinmaru’s body up and down like a rag doll, nearly causing the soup to spill onto his hakama. “Look, Midoriko is much stronger than you think, Nishi, stop pouting…” Kitsu hugged Midoriko by the arms, watching Midoriko tear up at the memory of last night’s fight, allowing Izumi to move aside to retrieve a small bag of herbs and a fresh kimono of pastel coloured fans cascading down back and forth with a matching powder blue obi, placing them on the side of the table.

“That entity got what it deserved. We better not extend our stay…”

Kirinmaru felt a shift in the energy of Kitsu; true, her heart was heavy from last night’s fight, but she had a will to live.

Not Midoriko.

She.

She…

Izumi smiled at Midoriko and Kitsu. “Take this tea…Midoriko-sama, whenever I feel that pain below here…” she said, gesturing her hand to her abdomen, “It should soothe it, and oh, I am giving you one of my old kimonos, I suppose it fits you better, Midoriko-sama…” She allowed Midoriko to slide out of bed, leaving blood stains on Izumi’s futon.

“Do you want to take a bath before you proceed on your next leg of your journey…”

Midoriko replied with an ‘Mhm’ sound, taking the new kimono in hand.

Kitsu plonked a few mon into Izumi’s hand. “Izumi, thanks for the help… and the tea should do good for the priestess…” Kitsu grinned cheekily, of course with much emphasis on the word priestess, holding a rueful chuckle for Midoriko. 

Izumi quietly kept it on the shelf. “Are you sure? The priestess should stay one day longer to tide over the bleeding, and you…”

Kitsu gave a smug expression to Izumi. “Well…” she replied, quietly picking up the bloodied fans. “What you did is enough. The priestess is strong…and she wishes not to stay idle…” Kitsu glanced at Midoriko getting dressed in the new kimono, holding her bloodied kosode and hakama in her hands. Kirinmaru noticed a change in Midoriko’s clothes; she no longer stood in the grounds of spirituality, but instead, looked youthful as ever, despite the fact that she chewed her lip, repressing all of the pain in the world. 

“Shall we make a move, Mii-chan…”

“Mhmm…” Midoriko replied quietly to Kitsu, to which Kirinmaru followed suit. 

Kirinmaru grew conflicted by the smell of fresh soap on her body, and yet the scent of blood never left her.

Kitsu bowed to Izumi. “Thank you for your hospitality…”

//////

Arata glanced at Sunako’s face, flushed with a strange glow, as if she had copulated with a man, but instead it was thanks to her slender fingers, glistening with her juices, that occupied her during such a lonely time. “Sister… You can simply step outside our realm and check on Kirin-Anki…” Sunako constantly rolled around her luscious bed, thinking lewd thoughts about her beautiful husband to be.

“...If you are so worried about him.” 

“Why…I placed trust in Ki-Ki…” Sunako pouted at Arata’s reprimanding. “I am not a child, do not coddle me like father…” She reluctantly forced herself to dress in a fitting black dress, whining at that fate. “Zero-nee-san is who I worry about…after all, it was because of her that I am married to this man…she expected me to play his cute little wife….”

“I have to give you props for actually fooling her…” Arata sighed a little, watching the flowers in her room spill blood onto the counter. “She is like a viper ready to strike if needed, especially for her brother…”

“I do not think so; she wanted power, not love…and so did I…”

Arata swallowed calmly at Sunako’s words. “Then how are you going to explain to father about Kirin-Anki’s fate, when he did not know what was to come…” 

Sunako pinched her earlobe playfully, giving a sultry pout to him. “I will simply tell him that he has gone on a long journey to get me the impossible items told of in lore: a jewelled branch from an ancient tree, and the hand of a dead monk…” Little did she know that her brother left quickly, much to the ire of a servant, all for preparations due to an unexpected visit,and thus  leaving to her dark thoughts.

Sunako slowly chewed her lip. I need to put on my charade properly, she thought to herself, scavenging over the pots to line her doe-like eyes. My sweet husband, come to me…your suffering shall be my meal.

—

Kirinmaru reluctantly smiled to himself as he looked over the small boats slowly floating upon the cerulean blue lake: he saw watchers in straw hats catching the wondrous sight, an elderly man carrying many stacks of straws, and the sunset glow bathing the trio. If he could squint further, a mountain seemed to appear perfectly. However, that picturesque scene was marred by the scent of blood.

Blood from Midoriko.

Why is she able to stand and walk the distances, and why did she not speak to me since I brought her to the healer?

What if the blood I spilled into my hands became so precious to me?

Kitsu broke the air with the nudging of Kirinmaru, who forced himself to munch on the sweet potatoes. “Hey Nishi, do not worry, she is fine. After all, I carried the bag of herbs for Midoiriko, just in case it’s bad…” Her stomach twisted at the sight of Kirinmaru’s gaze growing soft at Midoriko’s pained expression. “Look…give Midoriko some space…she will be fine…all women go through that and we come back all right…”

“It is just…” Before Kitsu could finish her lecturing on women’s bleeds, a trail of young girls carrying lanterns and flowers adorned in their hair arrived, giggling at the sight of a creature so sullen and yet so beautiful. What followed was an old merchant selling roasted sweet potatoes, making Kirinmaru’s mouth water a little at the caramelising aroma. 

Perhaps Izumi’s meal did not suffice him. Kitsu waved her hands madly at the old man, passing a few coins to him, in exchange for the hot sweet potatoes, which Kirinmaru cradled like a baby, though the heat prickled him. “OIIII!!! Ojii-san???? What is going on??”

The old man’s eyes widened with awe.  “It is our patron God’s day! Mahiruma-O-Kami, fellow travellers… Where he descended to the ground to marry the secret lovers! Tsubaki-chan and the human lover! Are you going anywhere?” he asked, looking at Midoriko indifferently, who was shuffling her feet at the sight of one of the village girls. Her name was Mibu, and she wore a pink star kimono and was holding the old man’s calloused hand. He chirped a little: “Stay with us, weary travellers for the night, and enjoy the celebrations.” 

“Oji-san!! A priestess so beautiful should snag a beautiful man that is shaped like a god who could rival Mahiruma-sama…how scandalous.”

Midoriko forced herself to bite her lip out of anger. Kitsu held Midoriko’s hand firmly, giving a reassuring gaze. “I was thinking of a stopover, old man, since we are exhausted from our previous venture…”

The old man noticed Midoriko holding the miko’s wares. “Be wary, Mibu-chan…it is best to hold restraint at these times, for they are our guests…” Mibu pouted at his gentle reprimanding. 

The old man gave a toothless grin, leading the trio into a quaint village. “Then you are welcome to come to our village…” 

And at that moment, Kitsu, Midoriko, and Kirinmaru came to that quaint village. The atmosphere seemed lighter than their previous ventures: no youkai to slay, no squabbling politicians to deal with, no hearts to be broken, no tears to be wept. One of the village girls held Kitsu’s hands: “Welcome! Welcome! Welcome…” The huts were well-maintained; one of the villagers was hanging up paper lanterns that shimmered amidst the sunset, and a chubby villager yelledloudly over the tantalising festival food.

Except Midoriko.

Midoriko stared at that picturesque village indifferently. It seemed like a beautiful dream, except it felt like a drunken joke.

One of the village girls, dressed in a tea brown kimono, laughed at the strange trio, holding flowers in her hands, laying them on the shrine with the deity’s name. “Pray to him! Pray to him! Especially you! You! You!” Kirinmaru frowned a little when the group of girls giggled over his handsome looks. “You will be well, and receive love from the priestess…” Midoriko grew angry over the girls’ fawning over Kirinmaru. “May the…” 

Kitsu quietly interrupted the girl’s fawning with a smirk. “No, we are fine. Do you know a place to stay? Preferably someplace with two rooms: one for that doofus, and one for the priestess and I.” 

The young girl gulped at him. “...My grandpa….has one…..let me see if I can get it for you….” She quickly sprinted away from Kitsu’s sight, who splayed her fingers over her face. “Nishi! What is with you, attracting all of the girls in the village? What are you, a god…”

“I….”

Midoriko calmly squeezed Kitsu’s hand. “...let…him…be…I…” She swallowed the bile that was bubbling up in her throat. “Should…we…for…once…relax….” Her voice rumbled in pain, just speaking about Kirinmaru’s involvement. 

“I suppose you are right, Mii-chan…”

Kitsu shrugged her shoulders. “We have had some tension lately, and with no contracts, we can actually use that time to relax.” She allowed herself to wander over to a stall to pick out a new kimono with a lovely pattern of cranes flying over the bright moon. Seems fitting for the occasion that is to come . “Is it me, or would the prayers of hapless girls praying to a god so mute actually benefit them…”

Kirinmaru bit his tongue. He wished to spout about the strange intersection between gods and humans, and yet it seems unfitting, as he wanted Midoriko to be that girl in the fields running so happily. And yet she was not.

Midoriko slowly transformed to that horrid creature, possessive over every woman that touched him.

What if she was the thing that the strange master hungered for?

The village girl huffed with good news on their accommodations. “Oh! Good news! You can stay for the evening…however, it would be one room, because another traveller popped by for the festivals…” 

Kitsu’s hand covered in exasperation on that change, biting her bottom lip lightly. “Sorry Mii-chan, it seems we all have to share the same room, huh?”

“...It…is fine…” Midoriko rasped quietly, her tears flowing from that irrational thought. “...We are supposed to enjoy ourselves…” Kitsu squeezed her shoulder reassuringly. 

“You do not need to…” 

Kitsu sighed to herself as they followed the young villager girl over to their accommodations for the evening, who was trying to withhold her blush at Kirinmaru’s handsome features. “We will manage what we can…” 

“I wonder: what did that old man who sells those tasty sweet potatoes mean, ‘when the god bound impossible lovers’…” 

The village girl chirped a little. “You do not know about Mahiruma-o-kami’s impossible act of love?” Kirinmaru grew distracted by the many snack stalls that perfumed the air in the village. “Ojii-chan says that when things reach a certain mark, that said object, like the fancy umbrella…” The village girl pointed to the craftsman placing sheets of paper upon the bamboo frame,“or a plate of tofu”, with that old lady wiping the sweat from her brow as she passed a plate of tofu to a hungry passerby took a life itself, and that Tsubaki tree, which you will see, is that testament.”

That tsubaki tree seemed so bare and alone.  “It once had life, and its flowers in spring will be most beautiful. She came in the form of a beautiful young woman. So beautiful that rumours circulated in our humble village that this youkai caused the strange disappearances of merchants and townsfolk, all attributed to her…”

“However…” The village girl slowly paused at the entrance of the inn, bowing to the scrawly old man. “A god…a god so kind watched them, from a distance, disguised as a merchant, to find out about the mysterious disappearances…”

The old man barked at the young girl. “Miho! You are late…you…you…” 

“I am sorry, grandpa. Can I have some fun tonight? My friends Ai and Naomi are hoping to pray for Mahiruma-sama to get us a lover…”

“This is bullshit…I…” The innkeeper pondered at the trio, and he gave a little bow to them; he did not know that Miho quietly took away their shoes and stashed them elsewhere. “Oh…welcome…sorry if I cannot make the desired arrangements at such a time. Please…follow…this young man to your night’s stay…” A young man wearing a gray hakama led the trio to their room, opening the sliding door for them.

“...I…hope it will be comfortable for you…”

Kitsu smiled wistfully. “Thank you; this is greatly appreciated.”

Little did they know that there are other guests in the inn: a sensuous howl between a couple, a wail from a child with a mother soothing its cry, and the soothing aroma of incense and blood that mingled in the air. And Midoriko being testy made Kirinmaru fear her more. Kitsu sighed to herself, putting her tajiya equipment down. “Seems that we came to this inn at the wrong time. Less sleep for us tonight thanks to the noises, but it beats us sleeping in desolated lands…” 

“Might as well have fun with it…”

Midoriko, however, did not reply to Kitsu, but instead plopped down by the window to see the rows of girls praying to that said god. Kirinmaru was confused by the aroma and the blood seeping through her pristine kimono, blurring the pattern. Their pleas to a mute god proved insignificant to her. 

“Pity that Izumi’s kimono is ruined by that…” Kitsu scowled quietly, grabbing the new kimono. “Hey, Nishi…look out for her. I am going to the onsen to clean myself, so take care of Midoriko…alright…” She gave a playful wink to Kirinmaru. There is something unspoken between Midoriko and Kitsu that he cannot put a finger too, but perhaps Kitsu knew that she has no choice for Midoriko’s safety, she has to trust a fool like him. “And oh, I am holding my peace Nishi…do not take it as weakness…” 

Kirinmaru did not reply as the sliding door slammed shut. He saw Midoriko sulking at that sight, crossing her legs, hiding the bleeding beneath her kimono. “Why don’t you follow Kitsu to the onsen? I mean, you could use the benefits of the warm water to like…”

“It is not allowed for a woman who has her bleeds to step into the healing waters.” Midoriko’s voice grew testy at Kirinmaru’s innocent question, averting his soft gaze. “...I am…fine…I…” 

“You know what…” Kirinmaru sighed at the side of the wall. “I wonder if what the girl in the village said is true? I wonder if that said god—Mahiruma—has ulterior motives to unite them, after she snared men to their deaths with her beauty…Midoriko, I was thinking that the gods must have cursed you to have this thing, to see you suffer…I…I suppose women become second-hand creatures to the…” 

Midoriko’s reiki flared under his innocent remark. “What am I to you, Nishi, insignificant???” Holding back her angry tears at the sight, her hands nearly blasted Kirinmaru to repress his youki, but instead, she felt her stomach twisting into many knots. 

“No…No…I…I…” 

Kitsu came in with a frown on her brow. “Nishi, what did you say to her…”, quickly grabbing a piece of cloth to tie her hair up. “I heard all of the commotions outside on my way to the pool, which is fitting, as I may need another cloth to wipe myself…”, snagging a small cloth from the floor.

Kirinmaru bit his tongue, blood nearly pooled in his mouth. “I…oh gods…I am…” He found himself hiccuping over the matter, watching Midoriko forcing herself to wipe the tears in her eyes. 

“Mii-chan…” Kitsu’s ire dropped into gentleness. “Hey…let’s have fun for once! Do not worry, I will make sure that Nishi is kept on his leash…” At those words, she placed her finger, gesturing a knife being sliced to his throat. Midoriko, meanwhile, shivered that she had showed a moment of vulnerability.  

She only left a huge bloodstain on the futon, and that smell assaulted Kirinmaru’s senses. 

There is pain.

Anger. 

Fear. 

Shame.

////

Slowly the trio came out from the inn, in hopes of catching all of the activities of the festival, though their hearts were separated.

Midoriko was quiet and solemn, observing many holding the fallen branches of the Tsubaki tree; Kitsu was out of her tajiya equipment, and gleeful over a new game stall to catch goldfish shimmering amidst the translucent lanterns; and Kirinmaru was so in awe of all the snacks offered by boisterous stall-owners that he grabbed a few sticks of dango with the coins given to him by Kitsu and continuously ate them until his arm was brushed away by another pretty girl, one with a busty cheek and a noh mask of a woman in her hand, waving flirtatiously to him.

Kirinmaru found himself fascinated by that young figure until Midoriko’s brow furrowed at that sight. 

“Oh…sorry…” Kitsu sighed to herself. “Hey Nishi, be careful…and do not go…” 

A storyteller, dressed as that said god, wore a lavender suikan and a pale blue overcoat. He bellowed loudly to innocent children and adults, harkening his story. “One evening, he heard the loud wails from an old tree. Puzzled, he sat there, laying a small rice ball at the foot of the Tsubaki tree. And if truth is stranger than fiction, she came in, beautiful as a courtesan, covering her face in shame. She was searching for a young man, who was cursed by a vengeful forest spirit to never kill anything, and she wanted to know his fate, as his heart seemed too pure to accept such foul irony.” 

Midoriko shivered at that fate of the man in the story, and a row of girls giggled at Kirinmaru continuously gulping many rounds of sake and munching the freshly steamed buns, only offering his cup to a blushing young lady. “Have this…I…do…”

Midoriko frowned at that sight, upon which Kirinmaru mumbled sorry to her. “Yeah…have that…” 

“The god searched for that young man,” the storyteller continued, “who happened to be making his rounds as a local healer. Calmly, the god took the form of a kind merchant and glanced at him, wiping the sweat from his brow and offering him a cup of tea to him. You must be thirsty after helping others. And as the merchant spoke, there was a young woman who was ill and seeking someone to cure her…” The storyteller grew somber, sitting down on the ground. “He spoke, then what ailment is she afflicted with? What the merchant spoke to him, I do not know, but as a god, I heard their prayers and they had to be answered…”

“The healer quietly covered his face in shame. ‘God god, I do not know this person and its affliction. How shall I cure that?’”

Before the storyteller could reach the conclusion on the healer’s will to cure the person, a loud cry bellowed out and into the crowd’s ears. “O GODS O GODS O GODS! Help us all…” it cried, pausing the story momentarily. The storyteller furrowed his eyebrows. “What seems to be the matter that you must yell at such a wondrous telling of our god Mahiruma-sama…” The once merry atmosphere became darkened by the man’s anguish. 

“I am sorry, my wife Kimi felt an immense pain, and she needs help from a midwife…” The crowd soon ‘tsked’ at the man’s demands. “The child…The child…I…I…” he dropped to his knees, begging for anyone, even the silent gods, to have mercy on him. “I am afraid she will die…”

“She will not die…” 

Kirinmaru suddenly saw a change in Midoriko’s demeanour; her reiki was no longer pulsing with rage, but instead with a cool resolve, ignoring the sight of young girls praying to a silent god. Breaking away from the maddening festival crowd, Midoriko shouted loudly in the distance to the panicking man. “Oi! I have some experience dealing with birthing mothers…” Kirinmaru quietly followed suit to her, ignoring Kitsu’s giggles, catching the goldfishes on sight, Midoriko’s aroma of blood smelt different.

It is exhaustion.

It is fear.

And yet…such... 

“May I know your name, and how long has your wife laboured…”

“Lady priestess, thank the heavens, thank the heavens, I am Tarou, and my wife felt a sharp pain two hours ago, as I was about to go and get new clothes for the babe…Please save her…Please save her…”

Midoriko held Tarou’s hand, ignoring the pain that consumed her, rolling her sleeves up upon that news. The glittering paper lanterns slowly faded into the secluded hut where a solo candle held its guard. And the woman screamed in pain. Midoriko did not even bother to hear the pants from Nishi, who ran up to the secluded hut. She clasped her hands in prayer outside of the hut, for the good to come.

“Get me a container of warm water, Tarou, and clean rags…” Midoriko spoke harshly to Tarou, gripping his shoulders. “It will be a long night…”

Kirinmaru yelled at Midoriko, “I can help, Midoriko, anything! Just anything! Before I go mad….” His hands slowly gripped Midoriko tightly, but the smell of her blood grew so potent that he felt a dizziness in his head, causing a shortness of breath.

Midoriko hissed at Kirinmaru, pushing him away slightly, tying her hair into a ponytail. “Not now! I bet you lost the attention of these ladies; they are better suited for you than I…” 

Kirinmaru held her hand tightly. “Please…please I could…you are feeling weak and I could…”

“Stay away from that…unless you can make yourself useful, Nishi…” Midoriko barked at Kirinmaru, immune to the wails of Kimi. “You can petition the gods to help, if you are compelled, but they will never hear you…”

/////

Midoriko’s blood that once consumed Kirinmaru’s brain became nothing, as another smell of a labouring mother—Kimi—pained him. He forced himself to chew his lip, and clapped his hands back and forth.

Please hear me. Whoever comes, near or far, for I am helpless.

Quietly, a serene voice whispered to Kirinmaru’s ears. “Oh…you must not be the husband of the one who cried …”  Leaves seemed to swirl around Kirinmaru, forming a young man with blonde hair wearing a lavender overcoat and light blue suikan sitting comfortably on a tree branch. His indifferent gaze, however, nearly sniggered at Kirinmaru, who was kicking at the trunk back and forth. “And you are not a human, but a baseless daiyoukai in love…” Upon hearing those words, Kirinmaru accidentally stepped upon one of the leaves, only to hear ripples of the women yelling to the sky at such a horror.

Kirinmaru chewed his lip, unaware that he was transported into a small garden. “I can see in your eyes what attracted you to that human. You can simply take a dagger and stab your heart, with the notion that she will notice you.”

“Who…”

The young man rolled his eyes, mockingly calling Kirinmaru out. “You know who, daiyoukai… and the person who you prayed to. And yet you do not utter my name...”

“For you, in the most unfortunate circumstances, prayed to me, Mahiruma.” Mahiruma swirled his wrist to form a cup of tea. “I was expecting a maiden to pray for the cusps of love, but you, in desperation when you desired a smooth childbirth, instead succumbed to that fading notion that I shall bind that human to you. Impossible stories become reality…” 

“However, I desire not, for its weight could pull you down…”

Mahiruma noticed Kirinmaru shuffling his feet back and forth, distracted by the ripples of sounds of the other world. “Mahiruma-sama…” Kirinmaru’s eyes averted to his cold gaze. “I fear her life will disappear when she bleeds, like I….”

“You…I suppose you are referring to the human.” Mahiruma quietly sipped his cup of tea, blowing a petal from the liquid to land in Kirinmaru’s mouth. “You are hopeless when it comes to the person you love…” He leaned his palm upon his cheek, watching that petal transfigure into deep bushes where he would be consumed. Kirinmaru tried to tear the bushes surrounding him, only to watch them grow back again at every slash. 

Mahiruma chuckled at Kirinmaru being hopeless in this fight. “Yes, she bleeds. It is normal for human women to endure this process to bear children… do not treat her like a porcelain plate to be displayed in your cabinet of curiosities...” He snapped his fingers to repress the bush’s growth, leaving  Kirinmaru breathless. 

Kirinmaru protested to Mahiruma. “No…” he said, balling his hands into a fist. “I did not…”

“Do not treat me as a fool…daiyoukai…” Mahiruma gave a shit-eating grin to Kirinmaru, seeing some of the leaves stuck in his body. “You must have done something to hurt her in this period of time, daiyoukai. You are so enthralled by her heart that you fear it will go away…” Mahiruma shrugged his shoulders in disdain. 

“For millennia, human women have had the strength that even someone like you lacks, and they hold it with wit and strength. And the one you wish to be bound to is strong. A priestess; what is your aim with her: to consume her reiki for pure pleasure, or to hold her beauty like one of those damn trophies…”

Mahiruma chewed his lip “I do not know about you, but it is a risky moment to hide your true nature, let alone to drown in your feelings for her…” Before they could finish their conversation, Kirinmaru heard the soft cry of a newborn babe. The smell of the babe seemed so sweet, and another cry came in. “There will be a point at which you will be discovered…”

Midoriko.

Kirinmaru felt at ease with the aroma of pine and ash alongside her blood, watching from the bubble of Midoriko searching for Nishi, along with the scent of happy tears for the new father. 

“A child is born and may I not hear your pain again.” Mahiruma pursed his lips a little, pressing his finger upon his forehead. “Do be delicate to the priestess; her heart is volatile and it is best not to consume it…” Kirinmaru found himself sitting at the bottom of the tree, waiting to see Midoriko coming out from the hut.  Her gaze was exhausted from the long labour, and breathless from managing the pains in her stomach. Her kimono, wet with the baby’s amniotic fluids and her own blood, mingled around her.

“Where are you, idiot….”

“Huh?” Kirinmaru continuously stared at Midoriko’s face; her face writhed in pain, and yet…

Gods…

She is brave…and so beautiful…even if she bleeds.

Midoriko’s feet wobbled over her arduous task. Kirinmaru quickly grabbed her arms, hearing the slow thumps of her heartbeat. “Nishi…if you want to support me, can you get some sticky rice and beans… first thing in the morning….” Midoriko’s brows furrowed over his helplessness. “Pray for the child’s health this evening…I have a feeling…” Kirinmaru tried to comb through her dampened locks; however, she bit her bottom lip in frustration, recalling the girlish giggles of the village ladies when he grabbed every dango and stuffed them into his mouth in childlike glee. “No…before she…I need to attend to the mother….”

“Oi!!! Mii-chan!!” Kitsu stomped her feet in frustration. “I heard from the villagers that you helped expecting parents! Are the mother and baby well?”

Midoriko smiled happily at Kitsu, though she squinted her eyes in pain. “The mother is strong and so is the child…perhaps it was the gods’ good fortune that we could help them, Kitsu-chan.” 

Fighting his senses on the sweet aroma of Midoriko’s bleeding proved so exhausting to him that Kirinmaru replied indifferently to her. “The gods…” Kirinmaru constantly stared at the tree, swearing that it could be the residence of the god, forcing himself to grip Midoriko’s arms. “ They indeed look kindly on us mortals…”

…was it Mahiruma? 

He seemed upset with me.

Does he care about his people at all, with their pleas and cries?

Kitsu raised an eyebrow, forcing Kirinmaru to pass Midoriko over to her arms. “So far, for a day of relaxation…Nishi and Midoriko” she said, nudging him out from his daydream of meeting the sexless god Mahiruma. “You two seem to bring each other closer, too close for my comfort…”

Kitsu took out a small brown sugar cube from her small pouch and popped it into Midoriko’s mouth, allowing its sweet liquid to dissolve there. “Oh, Nishi, do not indulge in Mii-chan’s anger…you looked so dreamy to the local girls…Someday, it will not do you any favours…” Kirinmaru ducked his head in shame, keeping quiet during their walk from the hut, where the sounds of the babe’s cry seemed like music to the parents’ ears, and the shimmering lights illuminated Kitsu carrying Midoriko back to the inn.

For that moment, the worrying moon seems so serene. 

Calmly, Kitsu laid Midoriko on the floor of the inn and she grumbled to Kitsu, “We should stay behind to check on mother and baby…and…”  She glared at Kirinmaru coldly due to the fact that during the evening he could be spirited away. Midoriko felt the urge to throw up, at which Kitsu took a small pail, and she expelled all of the contents in her stomach.

“Worry about that in the morning, you have bitten off more than you can chew, Midoriko…” Kitsu gently tucked her in, using her hands to rub over Midoriko’s stomach with medicated oil. “I will get the tea from Izumi…” However, Kirinmaru felt a silence over Midoriko actually suffering and yet admired the fact that she brought life to the cruel world.

“Hey, brooding one…” Kitsu cheekily grinned at Kirinmaru, cooing Midoriko by giving massages on her body. “Fetch us some water…preferably warm from the nearby spring…and let us women be…”

“Oh…”

Kitsu frowned at Kirinmaru’s baseless reaction. “Oh…look I think you will be scandalised, Nishi, if I strip her naked in front of you…” Kitsu grumbled to Midoriko, stripping away her yukuta to reveal her nubile body, though her curls were caked in blood. “Nishi…I swear, if it was not for my intervention, he would have quickly run to the nearest healer by now…” She scratched her head. “Mii-chan, be careful with him…I am not sure about his affections…”

Kirinmaru bowed down to Kitsu’s glare, chewing his lips to prevent words from spilling into his mouth “....Kitsu…alright I will go….”, gently closing the shoji door to hear their whispers in the room, which makes his heart sink. 

Midoriko whispered to Kitsu quietly. “Do not worry…I will…never fall for him…though…” Her exhaustion led her into a deep sleep, and Kitsu quickly took some rags and wiped her sweaty forehead and bloodied legs. “I promise…”

I hope she will not…

Kitsu must have a grudge on me. I just….. Kirinmaru quietly resigned to himself. These thoughts are fleeting, are like the sparklers the children held in the festival. Quickly Kirinmaru grabbed a bucket and towel from the shelf, only to see the innkeeper with a simple brown cloth around her neck shuffling around the discarded items. “Oh, if you are looking for somewhere to bathe young man, there is one that said that Mahiruma-sama made his daily walks in evenings where humans slept away, which only a few could see should they desire….” The innkeeper gave a playful wink to Kirinmaru, “Guessing from your gaze, you get to see Mahiruma-sama….”

More like him reprimanding me for my weakness. A very unkind god.

“How do you know….” Kirinmaru pressed his blunt nails on the fleshy part in his hand. “I just…I just….” The innkeeper gave a playful wink. “You have something in your mind, by the way you gazed at your friend, as if the god pressed his hand on your shoulder, giving you advice how to understand us, women….” watching him blush a little- jealous that Kitsu and Midoriko has that sisterly trust that he could not reach with his mortal hands, and yet his daiyoukai claws that has been shortened to blunt nails “However I am not here to judge, the spring is not too far, young man, just be mindful not to incur the gods’ wrath…”

That statement caused Kirinmaru to bolt away from the scene, hurt by hearing Midoriko groaning in agony in the room.  That smell of her blood when not hurt by mortal man or demon, what strength Midoriko must carry to bear children, and yet she brought life to the world, like that barren field.

That image would forever be burned in his mind. He wandered through the spring to scoop some water from the onsen, thinking about her eyes, which were resolved to fight whatever was to come.

Of a woman, he loved, that she is strong.

Stronger than anyone he knew.

Quietly, Kirinmaru got back from the spring, and placed a bucket of warm water outside the room, overhearing the storyteller reveal the coda of the story, and bringing a newly engaged couple on top of the pedestal.

“The healer walked by the path, only to see the tree withering its flowers as a whole. He sat there so silently—where he saw an apparition of a beautiful woman. Her eyes were soft, and yet so lonely. ‘If ye shall accept me as I am…I shall forgo my immortality for you…’ The healer held her hand so tightly. ‘I will…though I do not think the town will accept us.’ The merchant then walked over to the couple. ‘Dear tsubaki tree, what he said is true, but are you willing to accept such a truth…’”

‘I will…’”

“It said that the tree managed to break out of its mortal form and become human, though her stomach twisted in pain and found blood on her hands, which she had feared.”

“The healer spoke to her so sweetly. ‘Yes you will bear human suffering…’ The healer held her hand. ‘But we shall go together hand in hand.’ It is said that the tsubaki tree would remain barren; no flowers grew for many decades because of her choice, and she led a quiet life to be with the healer, though it is spoken that upon his death, she cannot bear to not be by his side-,so she transformed him into a dead bee and herself into the remaining flower, whose crimson hue burned the eyes of the mortal and the immortal. And that flower never faded, no matter how people dispersed it.”

I wonder if I am that Tsubaki tree, in the end, Kirinmaru thought to himself. For some reason, that story seemed disjointed in his head, and yet it was not. If I made that choice, would I be able to make peace with myself if I took her heart?

A thought rippled in Kirinmaru’s mind. Yes…Midoriko’s heart. The festival seemed so dull, compared to witnessing Midoriko’s strength as she helped a labouring woman. I wonder if she has the heart to forgive me.

Kirinmaru came back to the room, placing the container of warm water at the side of the futon where Midoriko laid down, writhing in pain, heaving her breaths a little. She was dressed in a fresh kimono of small floral patterns. Kitsu dozed off to the side of the room. He heard Midoriko’s wince: “The tea, Kitsu-chan…I…” He scented her blood; she was in pain. Quietly, Kirinmaru shuffled himself to his side, following his nose to the small bag of soothing herbs. He quietly rubbed small circles in her back and laid her down, allowing the blood to seep through his hands. He hated for Midoriko to be in pain, but knew that he should not treat her delicately.

Once out of fear, the blood that seeped over his hands that could carry children became so sweet.

Mahiruma-sama, watch over her. 

For the whole night, Kirinmaru passed the time steeping the tea for her, and listening to her breathing, forgoing sleep. One thing that a sexless god Mahiruma taught him was that women, even in their bleeds, held more strength than he would ever know.

///

The next morning, Kitsu woke up grumpy, only to see Kirinmaru falling asleep with his hands caked with Midoriko’s blood. She tsked at that sight only to see Midoriko sprouting a small smile on her face. “Mii-chan…I would suggest that we should stay a little longer in that village…” she said, draping Midoriko’s blanket over her. “And for once, do not force yourself to do something extreme…”

Kirinmaru mumbled a little. “Sorry…Morning…Midoriko felt excruciating pain when she slept, so I stayed up last night to watch over her…and I made the tea…as instructed…” 

Kitsu gave a rueful chuckle to Kirinmaru. “Why that sudden change…” she asked; Kirinmaru simply shrugged his shoulders, looking at Midoriko sweetly. “Previously you were freaking out, but now, you seem to be at peace….

“I just do not know…”

Kirinmaru looked over at the laughter of the festival crowd, with one villager looking eerily like Mahiruma himself, judging by his very actions towards Midoriko. “Should we get the sticky rice and red beans for the parents…” 

Kitsu grimaced to herself. “Why not…” she replied. Midoriko writhed in pain, shielding her eyes from the bright morning light, laying down on the futon quietly. “It seems that our stay in that village will be longer than expected, but it is far better than the wild woods where she could be attacked…” Quietly, she squatted at Midoriko’s side, combing a wild lock from her hair.

“Hey, Mii-chan…I will be off with Nishi to the market; you just have to take care of yourself…” 

Midoriko did not reply as the pain from the migraine clouded her mind. However, her reiki seemed to be stilled by Kirinmaru’s emphatic gaze, only to turn away to feel her organs burn.

The market seemed livelier than ever, though Mahiruma’s day seemed to pass slowly, especially with the girls still eyeing that handsome stranger Kirinmaru with faint giggles. 

Thankfully. Kirinmaru thought to himself. Only Mahiruma knew my true name here, and I am simply a nameless stranger who offered a simple prayer to keep Midoriko safe.

Meanwhile, Kirinmaru chewed his lip, thinking of Midoriko’s anger, but rationalised that her irrational feelings were not out of pure malice. He hoped if time was not persistent, he would buy her a small snack to bring her some joy from the festival— maybe rice crackers would be her favourite, or perhaps dango dusted with Kinako powder would touch her. 

After all, Midoriko should enjoy the festivities like a normal girl without any cares in the world. However Kirinmaru got distracted by looking at an old lady selling an array of jinbeis; one with the pattern of koi swimming around caught his eye, unaware that Kitsu was carrying cooked adzuki beans and glutinous rice around. “Huh…Mii-chan is persistent on that…Like her, you also went baby fever on that kid that is not yours…”

Kirinmaru’s eyes widened with amusement. “I thought that it would be nice for the parents, since they are not so well-off. Plus, it would make Midoriko happy…” he said to Kitsu as he happily passed a few coins to the old lady to get the jinbei for the baby.

“Not quite. Mikos to some extent have dealings with birthing women, sometimes alone with horrible circumstances. Midoriko seems immune to new life, but I do not know if the world treats them so kindly.”

Kirinmaru kept silent, withholding his tongue to speak further. 

“By the way, I wish not to be a stickler of tradition, but should we buy blocks of ink and paper for Oshichiya?” Kitsu shrugged her shoulders, passing the cooked goods to Kirinmaru. “Once we get back to the inn, should we ask Mii-chan what we should get for the mother…”

Kirinmaru withheld himself not to consume the steamed adzuki beans, nearly tripping on the floor, as he stared at the shiny exterior of the beans. Thankfully Kitsu has the reflexes to catch the jar without anything spilling on the floor. Kitsu gave a bemused smirk to Kirinmaru. Well he never changed his habits huh?  “You know what is best for her.” His eyes trailed upon the stall of grilled onigiri enticed by its smoky aroma. “Wait…does Midoriko have any particular cravings when she is…you know…” 

“Heh…” Kitsu chuckled a little. “You’ve become Midoriko’s good wife! How adorable…she is not a sweets person, but I know that when she passed through our village during her miko training days, I always snuck a grilled onigiri and placed it on her bedside. That would make her happy—I do not know if she ever outgrew that…”

“Just a moment….”

Kirinmaru smiled quietly, passing the jinbei and the cooked goods to Kitsu. “You can go first…talk with her…” There was a small twinkle in his eye, hoping to make Midoriko enjoy the festivities though they proved to be useless to her. “I will follow you later…”

“Alright, I will see you soon…and please do not bring a girl home.”

/////

Midoriko laid down, reflecting over the previous night. She had seen the births of many children, some with mothers who struggled and some with children without a voice. This one, thankfully, was neither of those: the child was a little boy whose eyes glimmered to the world while Midoriko struggled amidst her pain. She allowed herself to serve others, not serving any god, though she could be the god’s servant to the mere humans. 

“Mii-chan.” Kitsu heaved a little, carrying the cooked red beans and glutinous rice to Midoriko, plopping them on the floor. “Are you better now…”

Midoriko only winced a little, with her blood seeping through her kimono. “I wish…” The migraine gnawed her mind. “You got the food for the couple…and what is that…” she asked, staring at the small jinbei at the corner which Kitsu had neatly folded it.

“This was bought by Nishi, for some odd reason; he wanted to gift the baby something small…”

“Well…” Midoriko rolled her eyes a little. “It should be about the parents…but…that is…For the mother…perhaps we should get her some carp, boiled into a soup, and some mochi?” Her reiki slowly pricked to Kirinmaru carrying something small in his hand, exhausted from the market activities.

“Welcome back, Nishi…” Kitsu grinned through her teeth. “You know, you deserve the onsen as a reward for your errands…I will watch her…” Kitsu reached her hand to take that small parcel. Silence rang for both, which made Midoriko even more confused than ever, with brief gazes between Kirinmaru and Midoriko.

“What is that…”

Kitsu sighed a little. “Let’s say that he wanted you to enjoy the festivities…and not rattle with the mother and child.” Quietly, she made some warm tea for Midoriko to drink. “You still want to check on the couple, huh? I think we should go, once you finish your bleed…”

“Yes, I want to check if they can manage the child. I doubt that Tarou’s relatives are near,” Midoriko answered, even though she felt exhaustion in her body. “We are perhaps the only ones who can check on them…”

“Seems we found ourselves a temporary hub…”

Kitsu grumbled to herself. “Oh well, I will see if I can find other demon slayers who have passed through that area for any contracts for Nishi and I to do…while you…”Midoriko found herself falling asleep in Kitsu’s lap, where she took small breaths to ease her soul. 

Mii-chan what have you done to yourself? Kitsu thought, while Kirinmaru, freshly bathed from the onsen, looked sadly at Midoriko, who forced herself to swallow the pain of her cramps. “Did you tell her about the…”

“Midoriko will figure it out herself…she has dealt with much more hardships than you…but I am glad you thought about her…”

/////

Late in the night, Midoriko found her stomach growling a little. She glanced at Nishi and Kitsu, who were holding a temporary truce by sleeping together, without a squabble. She mustered the strength to munch onto the onigiri left by Nishi to the sound of the happy percussion of instruments from a distance and the children laughing at the game stalls.

And her heart started to smile.

//////

When Midoriko’s strength had lifted up and the bleeding lessened, it was agreed upon by the trio to trek the road to Tarou and Kimi’s hut. Midoriko dressed herself in a clean kimono with simple triangle patterns, allowing herself to bask in the warm rays of the sun, carrying all the items gifted to the family. Kirinmaru stared at the tree next to the hut, thinking over his brief encounter with Mahiruma.

He wondered if Midoriko had yet to accept what he was, until a milky and sweet aroma perfumed the air. Tarou forced himself to bow to Midoriko. “Welcome Lady Midoriko…uhmmm…come in…” Kitsu and Kirinmaru quietly bowed to the new parents in respect to them. The new mother, Kimi, allowed the baby to nurse at her breast, which Kirinmaru dared not look at the curve of it, which Kitsu grumbled to him with words like “Relax…it would be fine…”

“Congrats, Tarou-san…” Kitsu said as she laid the red beans and rice down on the floor. “You can take this to eat: it is for you, the mother…and the baby…”

“I appreciate you coming by…” Tarou mumbled to himself, forcing himself to make tea for the trio. “My wife’s parents are still making their way to our village…and my sister said she can only come by the day after.” 

Midoriko, meanwhile, smiled at the baby slowly, who was cooing at the sight of his sweet mother. “Seems that our little friend is doing well in latching,” she whispered so gently into the baby’s ear. “Hope the baby is well…” she said a little louder to his parents.

Tarou smiled quietly. “Yes… a bit fussy, but he is a good child.” He passed the cups of tea to the trio.  “The gods indeed blessed us with a healthy boy…and to be born on Mahiruma-sama’s day with the guidance of Lady Midoriko! What bliss…” 

Kirinmaru forced himself to break away from the shyness of seeing the mother tucking her bare breast back into her kosode. “For the baby…” he said, searching for the jinbei amidst the gifts of goods. He found it, and passed it to Tarou.

 “Thank you…” Tarou replied, his face onto the ground, weeping tears of joy over the small gift.

Midoriko noticed that the baby seemed to wriggle back and forth,causing a wrinkle of doubt in her expression. “Have you tried to expel gas from the babe?”

“Oh I tried…” Tarou chuckled ruefully, putting the jinbei away at sight, “but he is a stubborn kid…” Midoriko gently brought the babe from his mother’s side, placing his soft neck onto her strong shoulders, giving small pats on his back, resulting in milk spilling over her kimono. 

“Seems so, I cannot reach the bubbles in his back…” Midoriko grumbled to herself, as the patting did not work. Kirinmaru sheepishly looked at the baby struggling to expel the gas, as his face wrinkled with pain over the bubbling gas in his body.

“May I try?”

Midoriko chuckled to herself. “Sure, Nishi…but do not shake the child…” Kirinmaru minded the baby’s head by resting his neck against his palms; he could help but to be enamoured by his sweet face. 

Kitsu sighed a little. “He seems to be enamoured by the baby…why...it is…” she murmured, quietly scooping the adzuki beans and rice for Tarou to eat. “Mii-chan, do you want me to help to wash up the mother…”

Midoriko nodded a little, watching Kirinmaru grow quiet over that child. The baby could be seen as a little god in Kirinmaru’s hands, instead of a weak being. He nearly wept at that sight, and held to his heart that this world would be kinder to that new life. 

Forcing himself to focus on expelling the gas from the baby, Kirinmaru instinctually placed the baby on his strong shoulders, laying him on his back, gently patting him back and forth. 

Surprisingly, the baby made the loudest belch ever, startling Midoriko, who was watching Kitsu dab a piece of cloth on Kimi’s nether regions and still-slightly swollen stomach. She quietly rubbed ginger onto her shoulder to ease the wind building in her stomach.

Kirinmaru chuckled at the baby. “For such a little being, you did create an impact in the world.” Soon the baby fell asleep on his shoulder, causing his heart to melt. Strangely, Kirinmaru’s gentle scent of flower fields soothed the colicky babe.

“I feel that my child resonates with your male friend…” Kimi smiled quietly, watching Kirinmaru not minding when milk stained his kosode. “Perhaps both possess the same gentle disposition…” 

Kirinmaru whispered to Tarou, amused by the reaction of his son. “Have you thought of a name for the baby yet? If I am not wrong, by the seventh day the boy has wandered this earth, he should have a name right…”

“Yes…” Tarou sighed, allowing himself to eat the sweet treat. “But we have yet to think of a name for him. These options we have in mind seem not to suit him…” 

Kirinmaru thought quietly, watching the baby take small breaths in his sleep, before gently passing the baby to Tarou’s arms. “Kouta would be a fine name for a child like him…In a world full of those who held their power, it is indeed a strength to be gentle and kind.” Kirinmaru smiled at the child, touching his fine hair. “Am I right, Kouta? You will bring more achievements to help others with your gentleness than armies brought by ambitious forces.” 

“After your guardian, don’t you think it is a little weird…” Midoriko raised an eyebrow at that, with Kitsu gently dressing Kimi into a new kimono, with the aroma of fresh spring water perfuming the air. “Tarou-san, are you alright with that…you can always name him…what…”

Little Kouta made a small smile to Kirinmaru and slowly fell asleep in Tarou’s arms. Kirinmaru thought that his father’s spirit took another form, of an innocent baby with eyes of the present. 

“He seems to resonate with his name…” Tarou smiled quietly. “Hello, Kouta-kun. Welcome to the world, my son.”  Kouta slowly drifted off to a peaceful sleep, quieted by the stillness of the wind. 

Kimi nearly smiled at that sweet sight. “Kouta-kun, that name suits our son…” 

Mesmerised by the baby, Kirinmaru grabbed paper and some ink, quickly writing the kanji of the newly named Kouta. “Gentle achievement…be sure to take care of your mama and your papa, Kouta …” 

Perhaps it was a sign to Kirinmaru that things would be alright.

Kimi held Kirinmaru’s hand. “Would you mind staying for the Oshichiya? To share Kouta with the world?” she asked, the mother’s tongue getting used to that beautiful name for her son.

Kirinmaru humbly bowed to the parents. “We would, if you allow it.”

//////

The Oshichiya ceremony came happily, with Tarou’s older sister Mei, and Kimi’s elderly parents making their way to the humble hut. Kirinmaru and Kitsu helped to make the food for the family, despite Kirinmaru staring at the squirming Kouta lovingly. Kitsu was being surprisingly sporting about Midoriko’s endeavours of carrying bowls of tai and red rice to the family members.

Tarou took the courage to write Kouta’s name on the paper, which caused the aww from the close family members. Laughter filled the air as Kimi’s father patted the cheeks of baby Kouta, thanking Midoriko for such a selfless deed.

Quietly, Midoriko excused herself from the revelry, finding herself exhausted from checking over Kimi and baby Kouta. For now she was concerned about walking back on the road again to see new places.

For the moment, Midoriko was glad that they stopped by that particular village, despite the fact that she missed the revelry of the festivals. She enjoyed the simplicity of the townsfolk, who were unaware of the evils that had been slain by the trio: the old man who invited them to the festival sweeping away the debris, the children passing Midoriko fading flowers from the ledges to her hands as thanks for their good deeds, women bouncing their babies up and down, watching their chubby folds jiggle back and forth. And stallowners taking account of their inventory. 

Quietly, Midoriko passed by a particular shrine, trying to read out the name of that god. “...Ma…Hi…huh”

A still voice echoed in the distance. “A priestess…how interesting…”

Strange my reiki all of a sudden flared at a voice, Midoriko thought to herself, seeing a young man wearing a white suikan and lavender overcoat sitting comfortably at the bench. “You who called my name.” 

A smooth hand passed her a broken cup of tea. “Drink this, priestess, and let the world where you dwell pass through blissfully…”

Midoriko sniffed the cup of tea.

“Are you sure you don’t want to kill me and eat my liver as nourishment Kami-sama…” 

Mahiruma rolled his eyes at this sentence, watching the tea smoke transform the bench where they sat together into a small leaf. The village transfigured into a beautiful garden with rabbits hopping at their feet, and a calico kitten, who looked at Midoriko with mischievous seafoam eyes, had markings which divided her nose into one black streak, and rubbed between Midorikos’s legs. “No priestess, I am not that cruel…” The broken cup of tea felt warm in her hands. Mahiruma ruefully chuckled at Midoriko’s confusion. “You have the power to summon me in my true form, and yet someone called me to confess his feelings to you. I, Mahiruma, a sexless god.”

Huh? Midoriko thought to herself, trying to squint her eyes to see the faded village that had transfigured into the scroll paintings she barely glimpsed in her miko training. Mahiruma, meanwhile, petted the small calico kitten, savouring the tea. “In fact…” he added, allowing Midoriko to sit down on a lone rock, to prevent herself from flying away from the previous world. “I wonder why a daiyoukai wanted a priestess like you…” Midoriko forced herself to dig her slender fingers into the kitten’s fur, allowing the kitten to knead her thighs.

“...There is no way, by the spirits, that anyone wanted me…” 

Midoriko felt bile building up in her throat; Mahiruma took small breaths, allowing a deer to pass through his line of sight, giving a bow to the deer before feeding it with treats. He watched Midoriko fighting that feeling in her heart. 

No, it cannot be.

Nishi is…well…I…

He seemed so gentle with baby Kouta. 

Her reiki went wild with that mere thought that a daiyoukai would seek such affections.

“What I thought, Mahiruma-sama, is that Nishi, well a male friend of mine, is…” Midoriko faked confidence in her voice, forcing herself to dig her feet upon the dirt. “He…He…I…”

Mahiruma chuckled a little. “Priestess, in your joy…” he said, allowing the calico kitten to disappear into thin air, only to transfigure to Kirinmaru holding baby Kouta gently. “You prayed to the wrong god…” he added, before he transformed the projection of Kirinmaru letting go of the baby back to the kitten again, who now purred at Midoriko’s side. 

No, I did not. Midoirko forced herself to drink the tea over and over again. I intend to…

“That one, he pleaded with me during the joys of the festivals, though I am not assigned to bound people’s lives…” Mahiruma gazed at the glassy reflection of his tea. “He is brave to forgo his nature to be with you, but I must warn you, priestess: be clear of heart…” 

Mahiruma gave a rueful chuckle to Midoriko. 

“I knew my fair share of gods devoid of their purpose to be with humans, and to some extent demons. So a priestess whose belly is filled by a demon would be considered unfavourable to the narrow vision of humans…” 

Mahiruma touched the rim of Midoriko’s cup, allowing her to drink the liquid quietly to settle her thoughts. “There will be some who would harm you…even if you take the step of colouring your lips to hold his affections…” 

“Mahiruma-sama, no offence…but…” Midoriko chewed her lip. “There is no way, by the spirits, that a demon would like me. I would simply slit its throat and bury it with many sutras…” She forced herself to gulp the tea, with its taste growing bitter at every word, ignoring the sight of the rabbits humping in the distance. Slowly the village world transfigured back from its painterly lens into the loud chatter of people, Mahiruma giving a pout to the sudden disruption as the kitten disappeared into the darkness. 

“It seems my time is up…a pity.”

“However, I believe if he is true to his word…” Mahiruma grumbled to himself… “I doubt you will believe him…but do not come back to my shrine if you plan to wed him.” Calmly, Mahiruma disappeared into the realms of the bushes, chasing that calico kitten, leaving Midoriko holding a chipped glass of tea, sitting alone in the shrine, trying to absorb Mahiruma’s words. A little boy with a chipped tooth slapped Midoriko’s face. “Hey…Priestess…I think…” Midoriko’s hands dropped the glass of tea, with the breaking sound waking her up from her reality. “There are two beautiful women that came to our village recently…they wish for your blessing…”

“Oh…sorry….”

Quickly, Midoriko wiped her sweaty palms, looking around the village— how long have I been spirited away to Mahiruma’s garden? The village lacked the charms of the festival and it seemed so plain, and Mahiruma’s words, Was it he? My father?

Midoriko chewed her lip-with the thought of a stern god lecturing her about the whims of life, when she supposed to be the voice to them. Am I on the deep end? Midoriko took deep breaths, grounding herself to the reality. There are children running around in the field, with a little girl passing her a small flower, which seems dull as opposed to Mahiruma’s gardens. “Oh thank you….”, subconsciously plaiting it in her hair before, shaken to that reality that she could love him.

No.

Midoriko looked over the village again, observing strangers not responding to her girlish nature, maybe her stay could pass for mere moments. I shall not love him. Midoriko thought to herself. He is simply a….

I am sorry Mahiruma-kami-Sama I will not….

//////

Midoriko shook her head as she saw a group of men swarm over the two ladies, with a burly man rubbing his swollen cheek over that slap. “Hey…Priestess, go easy with that other lady; she has a feisty temper…but…”

Kitsu?

If Midoriko knew anyone with a temper, it would be Kitsu. 

“Though the other one, she is a tennyo in human flesh. Oh to steal her sash and hear her honeyed words…” the skinny villager sighed lovingly to his friend. “I would climb the moon to be with her…” 

What? A Tennyo in the flesh? No, there is no way?

Midoriko forced herself to break from the crowd to glimpse the two ladies. And yes, the first one was obviously Kitsu, who was grinning and bearing with the affections of men. And the other one…

The other one looked painfully female—hiding his bobbing Adam’s apple underneath the fan. At first, Midoriko found herself blushing at that sight; however, upon further inspection, Midoriko’s blood went cold: what the hell, is Nishi dressed as a woman? 

“Oh Lady Priestess, can you save us from the men that stalk us, just make some excuse…” Kitsu muttered exasperatedly. “I need to catch up with my deal with him…”

“What the hell, Kitsu-chan? What, am I your prize???” Midoriko sighed a little. “Alright I will try, perhaps…Kitsu-chan, faint upon sight…” 

Kitsu winked to Midoriko cheekily, mouthing her words to her as she pretended to collapse onto the floor. “Nishi is going to lose…I am yours…” And Kirinmaru played along with that scene, bowing to the men. 

“Excuse me…my companion is weak in the heart…” It was obvious that Kirinmaru’s high timbre did not do many favours for the maddening male crowd. “Lady Priestess, can you bring us back to your temple to save my friend…” he asked, his hand nearly reaching Midoriko, causing her to sweat out of fear.

“Will do…”

Midoriko forced herself not to look away from Kirinmaru’s lovely face, pondering over the words of the sexless god Mahiruma. “Let’s go…”

Somehow, the calico kitten followed Midoriko’s path, only diverging its path from a lovely couple wiping the vomit from a puking child. It sat there so still; Midoriko chose to ignore its fate, however, and go back to the inn.

A/N: Hello there! I hope you are well this time! 

Well this is a much longer chapter than ever which is basically Midoriko being miserable AF in her period (which coincidentally I am about at the tail-end of it as I publish it), and looking back right now, this chapter was mega fun as I put a lot of myself in here, during the conception of that said chapter- I, unfortunately, was hit with the worst end of period cramps and pain which I have to take MC so many times. I really hope I depict it in an honest platform that is entertaining and emphatic of our struggles (yes that include trans men and NB themselves).

In fact one of the scenes that I work on, is Midoriko walking out of Tarou's house , in which Kirinmaru could smell her period blood and the baby Kouta's fluids mixed together, as I want to highlight the strength of women itself, yeah- we have to deal with that stupid bodily process and yet work through our lives. I mean Mahiruma in our story call Kirinmaru out of his stupidity bruh 👏 Speaking about Mahiruma!!, the reason I enjoy working on this chapter, as I have to introduce my boy Mayonaka in that story (I know, you must be confused, as I have to use that name-"Mahiruma" to not to be mistaken for another fic I am working on- ‘The God with Many Names’), because I think he deserved bad characterization that Trashhime LOL. 

So Mayonaka in 'I want you' sorta followed his canon role in YH, but molded differently, as I called him the reluctant sassy fairy godmother, so think a sassier Uncle Iroh meets Mushu, though lately, I thought of Daichi from Haikyuu (Yes I love his tired dad nature)

Mahiruma is a super fun character to write in that perspective like he is attuned to the world, and yet he took that role as the mentor to push both Midoriko and Kirinmaru in their journeys, for Midoriko to be aware of the nuances of womanhood like her sexuality and romance, and Kirinmaru, is to establish his voice as a man. Like it is obvious to see the contrasting treatments which I have the most fun to do, that Mayonaka seems more sceptical about Kirinmaru’s motives vs Midoriko he is slightly gentler to her-listening her out in equal status. He also have an arc in this story which you will see more of it, and he is growing even more stressed in the process of dealing with these idiots :')))))). I swear Mahiruma is my beloved LOL

And that youkai I mention is Furutsubaki no rei which I did some research for the bonding as there is a reasoning, with that character, it is attributed to strange disappearances but I wonder if she is capable of human emotions, and adding that human element of her first meranche- proves to be powerful.

Favourite scene: I would say aside from Midoriko coming out after helping Kimi to give birth to Kouta, I think it would be a tie between Mahiruma's first appearance to Midoriko and Kirinmaru, and Kirinmaru being gentle to baby Kouta, like I swear I was like 🥺🥺🥺🥺 when he managed to burp the baby and how comfortable he is to Kirinmaru, and it makes Kirinmaru realize that yeah, the world is not shitty as he seen.

Since we are talking about fairytales and all, today’s question is what is your favourite character archetype and which one you need to write more? For me, I attuned to myself with the child archetype and the mentors, IDK why it came to me easily and plus it is part of my nature to want to guide others and yet I want to find that happiness.

And speaking of that, the next chapter is the beginning of Midoriko's arc, her journey to understand her womanhood- which I am excited about as I placed a lot of twists and turns here!!

Chapter Text

Chapter 6: An Island drifted to different ions.

Suijin pouted at the drama unfolding in the council of gods: poor Kurayami-sama, how he could stomach his daughter Sunako’s affairs ? Especially when she made such a scene that her fiancé had been gone, and the need for answers? 

How Zero dealt with it, Suijin thought to herself, well it was incredible, as one of the servants rushed her to her side, feeding her with a simple meal of congee and small side dishes to whet her already lost appetite. “Suijin-sama, how is the council of gods…”

“Terrible; Mahiruma must be glad that he withheld his place…” Suijin found herself nearly plopping down onto her bed, looking at the fishes that swam around her palace. “Now it feels like I am the rational one…”

“We are very sorry, Suijin-sama, we are…”

Suijin smiled a little. “You do not need to apologise. I just need to…” she said, allowing the servants to leave after placing the food on the table.

It feels like a horrible game in which gods must take sides against each other, not working on a common goal. Perhaps that is why Mahiruma decided to stay away from the affairs of the gods.

I wish that I had the authority on that.

One of Suijin’s court members—Beijiro— came in, bowing to her. “It is a pity to see the lady downtrodden! The gods are so unkind, and so are humans….” he said, and Suijin allowed that company of the minister. He helped himself, chewing the round rice dumplings in his mouth. “Suijin-sama…no matter how much you try, you will never win…”  

Suijin sighed to herself. “You are subjected under the gaze of Kurayami-sama, which I have a feeling he will subject his stupid children to their authority once his illness takes its course… unless of course we can persuade Mahiruma-sama to go back to his position…”

“Unlikely; Mahiruma-sama is always stubborn…perhaps he wished to keep his wits away from Sunako-sama’s drama and Arata-sama hungering for the top spot…”

Suijun forced herself to drink the soup amidst the chill of her palace, when an idea settled in her mind like the floating leaves in her soup. A different eye is much needed, Suijin thought to herself. That is what Chayorei-sama would say.

“May I trust you to care for the affairs of this realm, Benjiro-sama…”

Benjiro bowed to Suijin over her words. “Yes, my lady. How about Sunako-sama…what would you say…” 

Suijin grinned to herself. “Sunako is like a child without a toy; just give her as much as she can take …she will easily shut up…” Quietly, she whisked herself into a tiny little bubble into her chambers, tossing her coral earrings to the hapless Benjiro.

Quietly, Suijin looked over her wardrobe and found ordinary robes which would hide her goddess aura. Dwelling amongst the humans did not seem like a bad idea, plus Benjiro could handle a few tantrums from a certain goddess. As she took a small pot of cream to rub onto her earlobe, a prick was felt in her aura.

Huh?

Kusu?

Suijin closed her eyes. No, that cannot be. It cannot…wait…huh?

Alright…

Suijin quickly flexed her fingers up and down, to transpire herself unto the human realms, without any care of what gods would conspire or what is not.

—--

A few days ago, during Midoriko’s disappearance to Mahiruma’s gardens.

“Sheesh…” Kitsu grumbled to herself, laying down at the mat of the inn, “Mii-chan seems to be gone like forever…” 

Kirinmaru, meanwhile, enjoyed a moment of silence, watching the fall leaves falling upon the passageways. “Maybe…”

Kirinmaru’s mind thought of little Kouta learning about the joys and the pains of the world. “Midoriko is so brave to bring him to the world, despite the fact that the battle is always near…” Kitsu chuckled to herself, polishing her steel fans. “I do not know about that aspect of Mii-chan, Nishi. I wish for her heart not to be sullied…worshipping her alone, ugh…” 

“You know what you two need is simply time apart, which, Nishi…” 

Kirinmaru scrunched his nose to see Kitsu pulling out women’s kimonos given by the prince as a reward to solve their ailment. “You bet something on me while we made our way to Ryuurou-ouji-sama’s realms.”

“I am not a person who forgets things. You may see me taking the form of a male; henceforth, you are no longer Nishi when I make you a woman…” Kitsu forced herself to munch a huge manju bun in her mouth, thinking desperately about how she was going to dress Nishi up, though to be honest she found the thrill of slaying youkai satisfying that strange domesticity which clawed under her skin. “All we need to do is to apply some rouge on you and blacken your teeth, at which I failed, because the intricacies of applying makeup are not my speciality.”

“Do you know anyone that can...” 

Kirinmaru felt an immense regret in that situation. “If not, I do not mind visiting Tarou and Kimi to see how baby Kouta is doing…” He felt a connection to that child although their blood was different. “Can I go to the market and buy something for the family…”

“As you wish…while you are at it, do ask the villagers if they caught sight of Midoriko…”

Kirinmaru found himself enjoying that tranquil village: no contracts to be fulfilled, no obligations to be settled, and no children begging to be born. It was just calm and still, like his hallowed childhood days. Though at mere glances, he feared that Mahiruma, the hesitant god, would take another form to lecture him. 

But no gods shall hold Kirinmaru save only for himself.

Kirinmaru looked over at the children who played along the fields, thinking how Midoriko’s strength would bring happiness in his life. From that moment, Midoriko’s heart should be held by him, not to build strength to the hungry Sunako, before stumbling upon a stall selling little cakes, and an inquisitive old man watched Kirinmaru staring at the cakes, imagining that Midoriko would like these treats, if she was an ordinary girl.

“How can I help you, sir….”

Kirinmaru smiled quietly. “Two cakes, please….” 

If Kirinmaru could choose as a god, then he would give up his immorality to be at her side. He did not even notice a flock of crows swarming around him.

/////

Kitsu, meanwhile, sighed loudly that there were no contracts to fulfil, knowing that the prince’s reward would run dry eventually—until she glanced upon a petite girl with a similar face to Mii-chan, except she was chewing a hemp straw in her mouth, holding bloody blades in her hands. “Kitsu????”

“Sakura-san???”

Sakura chuckled to herself. “It has been a while! I heard from the locals that this village would be a perfect rest stop; too bad I missed the festival of their patron god…” she commented, rubbing her head back and forth. “I take this as a time to pause, and if I am lucky, I pray for Mahiruma to give me a new contract…How about you and Lady Midoriko…” she asked.

Kitsu rolled her top lip. “Long story cut short, Midoriko and I found a man at the edge who managed to save our asses for the prince’s curse. But, despite that, well… he is not the brightest…and we met a noble who harmed women during their cycles, that one was one tough motherf**ker…but at least their lives are not in vain…”

“Oh I see…” Sakura pouted quietly. “I suppose lifting the curse of the prince got you some high rewards…”

Kitsu gave a tsk about that. “Yeah, but we spent some part unfortunately to buy things for a new arrival, delivered by Midoriko while she had her bleeds, which I am wondering if you know of any nearby contracts, because…” Her callused left hand held the joint of her shoulder, making small rolls to alleviate the stiffness of sitting around the uncomfortable mats. “For all I know, I was never fit for the life of domesticity…” An idea planted in her mind; maybe Sakura could help with that situation.

“Wait, you know what? Are you able to slay a man, to make him as beautiful as a tennyo…”

Sakura chewed her lip. “Why…” Kitsu gave a cheeky grin to her. “You could be useful here. I would treat you and the fellow slayers to drinks if I can get some alone time with Mii-chan, not him…” 

/////

Suijin felt at peace as she wandered over to the human village as an ordinary human; everything seemed so peaceful with the water flowing by and the bare tsubaki tree standing so firmly, with no flowers to bloom. She sat herself comfortably, relishing the shade, watching the humans pass. Humans are complicated, yes but so is the flow of life that each process can be complicated or simplified, that perhaps the gods who dwell in land or above would never know. 

Suijin found herself falling asleep upon the barren tsubaki tree, exhausted by the chaos in the world, to feel a prick in her reiki.

Kusu? 

Suijin quietly heard their voice, and that urged bubbles to her like a wave. “Huh…There is something wrong…”

////

Quietly, Kirinmaru managed to hold the bag of two cakes, making his way to the hut, where he saw Kimi managing to hold Kouta upon her breast, with his mouth dribbling with his mother’s milk. “Hello Tarou-san…” His voice quieted to sense Kouta suckling her milk. “I hope you will like this…”

“Thank you, Nishi; you are so kind to us…I wonder where Midoriko-sama is? She missed out on the naming ceremony for our son and the nice weather for the day…”

Kirinmaru swallowed quietly. “I wonder, too…” he said, observing Kimi being able to burp Kouta, which resulted in a giggle, sensing that Kirinmaru was around. He stared at Kouta quietly. “Hello Kouta…have you been good to your mum and dad…”

Kouta slowly smiled at Kirinmaru, which made his heart melt at that sight. “You seem to care about Midoriko-sama, huh?“ Tarou spoke kindly to Kirinmaru, while he chewed his lip in frustration. “What an impossible love, a man falling in love with a priestess. It will end in heart-ache, Nishi-san, but I do think she loves you. She has yet to admit your thoughts to you, due to her duties…” he added, allowing his wife to rest by taking the baby in his hands.

“Do not hold Midoriko-sama so high, it will end with disappointment…” Tarou slowly moved Kouta’s legs up and down in a little dance, allowing himself to go out of the hut, observing the leaves falling by. “Just accept her as she is…” and Kirinmaru quietly caught the leaf from his hand, glancing at baby Kouta through the translucent surface.

“By the way, if Midoriko-sama and you are compelled, you are more than welcome to stay in this village—but no obligations…”

Kirinmaru smiled softly at that offer. “Thank you, but…” Suddenly a thought ran in his mind: that this happy moment will be gone, like many other moments. “I have a feeling that we will go soon…” he replied, forcing his feet to dig upon the ground. 

“Perhaps…”

Kirinmaru somehow thought that his father’s spirit followed him, and yet it faded over that sight. “If you get to find Midoriko-sama…” he hated that term ‘sama’ upon her, but he must use it in order to distance himself from that burning love. “Tell her to meet us again at the inn where we stayed…”

“...Oh…I see…” Tarou gently allowed Kirinmaru to walk away from the hut, unaware of the flock of crows watching from the almost barren tree. Upon that day which he witnessed Zero’s hands holding tightly upon a pre-pubescent Kirinmaru, the aroma clinging upon Zero’s kimonos, smelling like his stepmother Wahiko murdered in cold blood. All of the court members sided with the deceased Koushirou, and Zero’s mother was in disarray on who should hold the throne, upon the falling autumn leaves. “Ototo-san, the chaos is needed, all the forces are long gone, but do not worry, we will figure a path for each other, a new life that to come, to restore our father’s glory…” 

Zero held his cheeks tightly “And you, are that hope…” she said, caving her fingers into Kirinmaru’s wild locks.

“I suppose you need to go…” Zero chided Kirinmaru, indifferent to the bows of the new court members, pleased over that dead body, when he felt Kouta tugging his locks, snapping him back to Tarou’s concerned expression.

“You seem dazed…”

Kirinmaru shrugged his shoulders. “Yeah…I think the other girl, Kitsu, must be worried…”

Tarou smiled a little. “Of course, do come back to see us…” Kirinmaru barely looked over the flock of crows following him, seeing the village life being unaffected by what he thought about the missing presence of Midoriko that he imitated her still poise, sandwiching his fingers in between, rubbing it for comfort.

The cool morning changed into a balmy afternoon as he made the way back to the inn, unaware of Kitsu grinning maniacally. “Ahh you came back quickly! And, oh, meet my friend Sakura…” she added as a smaller girl grinned maniacally at him.

Kirinmaru could hear Sakura murmuring under breath to be like ‘Oh you are right’, snapping him out of that melancholy, seeing the pots of rouge and liquid soot in her petite hands. Kitsu proclaimed loudly. “She may be petite…”

Kirinmaru gulped a little, watching Sakura bring out pots of kohl and rouge in her hands. “Besides slaying the demon in one swing, her powers with a brush will turn a swine like you into a tennyo…” Kitsu slowly took the luscious robes—lavender with abstract forms of plum blossoms—unto him. She could feel the change in their auras, amused by the shenanigans that are to come.

—

Quietly, Kirinmaru opened his mouth to allow Sakura to paint his lips. Loud caws echoed in his ears, at which Sakura cursed under her breath instead of drawing a clean line upon his supple lips. “Damn dammit…'' she swore, a long vermillion streak across his chin, making him look like he drank all of the blood he could. “Let me deal with it….”

Kirinmaru bowed to Sakura, picking up the luscious fabrics from the ground, allowing Kitsu to move in his place.

Kitsu rolled her eyes. “Well, I have been followed by birds. How fantastic…” Stubbornly, she took the pot of rouge and painted her lips. “I hope I can win for Mii-chain’s sake…”

“I wonder how you find me? Sister…”

The crows glanced at Kirinmaru coldly, and one landed on his shoulder. He sighed a little at that crow, petting it bony the head “Do not worry, I am fine, I will get the heart for my wife Sunako…I just need a little more time…I have yet to…”, chewing his lip nervously, allowing the rouge to stain his teeth.

Soon they flew away to the sky, which Kirinmaru wishes that his sister would not see him in that state, half painted and yet so human. 

Kirinmaru glanced at Kitsu all dolled up; her friend Sakura hid all of the flaws of a tajiya. For that moment, Kitsu looked like an ordinary woman, not someone with gritted teeth. “Let’s continue, Nishi…” Kirinmaru quietly walked back to the hut, with his stomach twisting over that sight of the crows staring at him. “Men would hate an ugly woman like this….”

/////

Quietly, Sakura quickly made Kirinmaru’s now mid-length hair into a gorgeous bun, pinning it firmly with her strength, allowing Sakura to shine a polished glass upon his face. For that moment, Kirinmaru raised an eyebrow to see himself, almost feminine, especially with how he forced himself to push away that falling lock out of his hair.

“Now then, shall we have a fun day out…”

Kitsu came pouting at the sight of Kirinmaru, passing the fan to him. “I am going to win for sure…” she said. And quietly they came out from the room, to the glares of the male villagers staring at the new beauties. 

Sakura gave them a wave goodbye. “Good luck Kitsu,” she called, “I am sure you will stay by Midoriko’s side…”

“Oh, I will…”

Kirinmaru quietly dug his hands into the kimono, taking small steps onto the pathways, earning wolf whistles from a group of male mercenaries. Kitsu giggled at Kirinmaru’s bashfulness, giving a wink to Sakura. 

“Shall we go to the market to see if the wolves want to play with us…” Kitsu triumphantly shouted from the top of her lungs. “It would be fun…” 

Quietly, they passed through a market where male villagers glared at them, “Hey…” A burly man flexed his muscles to the pair of girls. “You seem lost. Why don’t I bring you to the stall…” 

Kirinmaru forced himself to laugh in a falsetto voice. “Oh….”

Kitsu, meanwhile, grinned and bore with the gaze of the burly man’s companion- she could tell from his expression that he bore sharp teeth and starving. 

“What?” he said. “she is so cute…” 

Suijin, now dressed in a simple Hana'asagi yukata, thought to herself, as she came over from the busyness of the market stalls, some selling washed out lanterns to impoverished children, some with merchants showing secondhand kimono robes, and then, watching the children playing tag amidst the fields. 

The human world is so beautiful , Suijin thought to herself as she admired the falling leaves in her pathways. Maybe I should see if Mahiruma-sama still walks around the towns in silence in his guise as a merchant. After all, only a certain few, like sharp-minded priestesses and staunch believers, could sense gods out of their disguises, and it seemed that the passersby would not sense a goddess walking in the pathways. But then again, Mahiruma rather retreated himself to his floating world where he would occupy himself folding endless paper boats—it would have been Chayorei-sama, I suppose . 

However, she smelt a sweet aroma perfumed the air, and it was not flowers, but an old lady using the tools to flip the pancakes. “Young lady! What do you want….”

Suijin squinted her eyes. Oh yes I am a human, not a god, so I must think like one.

“Sorry, I am new here…” Suijin bowed to the stall owner, rubbing her soft black hair out of embarrassment. “What do you recommend, Madam….” 

The old lady chirped at Suijin. “Oh I would recommend the Kinako flavour! It is not too sweet….”

“Oh I will…may I have one please, how much is it, madam?” She quickly searched her drawstring bag for some spare coins to pay to the lady. Maybe I should check out Mahiruma’s shrine, that would be a nice place to walk by. 

“10 mon, young lady…”

Suijin chirped to the old lady, dropping the coins to her. “Thank you so much, many blessings to you…” That simple dessert beat Kurayami-sama’s lavish feasts, which bloated the stomach and caused restless nights in her palace. 

If I could guess correctly, Mahiruma’s shrine should be….

Suijin gazed over the two ladies, surrounded by the hulking mercarnies, which one of them — Kitsu — dressed in an olive green yukata, showcasing seaweed strands dotted with grey and blue blots, grumbling under her breath, curses to crush his nether regions.

This human is fine.

She sort of managed that situation by asking them to search for the best food around the markets, leaving her companion, Kirinmaru—the one wearing the lavender flowers shivering at the corner. “Little lady….” A man scratched his bald head, picking out a tick out of his hair.

The companion’s piercing emerald eyes searched for an exit, hiding her mouth with a fan, making false giggles to another, who was of course making lewd remarks about her ankles and nape. “ I love women, when they are silent…I suppose….”   

Suijin, meanwhile, gazed upon the uncomfortableness of Kirinmaru as she tried to take the small pancake to eat. 

There is no way, that a man should treat a lady like that. Suijin thought to herself. I must stay away from trouble, I suppose to have a relaxing day without any….

The mercenary’s actions did not sit well with Suijin, watching his hand slowly digging to Kirinmaru’s chest, and him hyperventilating out of fear- that his secret would be found. 

“Hey…cut it out, idiot…”  Suijin lashed out at the burly man, with a pout, throwing the pancake to his face, not minding the scowl in his face. He only barely wiped it quickly- unphased by Suijin’s throwing.

“Stay out of the way, you bitch….”, grabbing Kirinmaru even tightly than before. “They are our companions not yours…”

Suijin’s heart stung at that treatment. Perhaps there were reasons to be disdainful to humans, but on the other hand, humans…

Humans…

Suijin gave a small grin. “Please,” she said to the men, “have some manners…” at which Kirinmaru looked helplessly at the woman who slowly swished the small ponds, splashing it onto their faces. The villagers were in a trance at the sight of that powerful woman; meanwhile, looking over, Kitsu tried to swallow her disgust at the man grabbing her ass. 

“You are so cute…” Suijin cooed at Kirinmaru, by now biting his tongue. “What are you doing in this town…”

Kirinmaru scratched his head, trying to think of an excuse to distract that woman. “We came not too long ago to the festival to celebrate Mahiruma-o-kami-sama…and thought that the weather…” Kirinmaru found himself dropping the falsetto tone at times. “Is nice…and plus my friend Kitsu…well…well…”

Quietly, Suijin took a bubble of water and transformed it into a hot bun for Kirinmaru to devour. “Take this…it should give you strength…friend…” 

Quickly, Kirinmaru took a pause, noticing that the rouge smudged from his lips, and he shuffled his feet up and down.

Suijin frowned her eyebrows. That woman feels unusual, like many colours bursting inside that body. 

Green.

Red.

White.

Maybe….

However, Suijin swallowed her inner thoughts, forcing herself to smile in front of Kirinmaru, who seemed to wolf down the bun like a man lost in the wilderness. There was a genuineness that Suijin appreciated; she wished other gods would be similar to this ‘woman.’ “Strange….”Suijin muttered to herself, only to see Kirinmaru frowning at her. “You seem not to belong here and yet…” Suijin glanced at the little calico kitten, feeling that aura as she rubbed her legs. 

“Hello…”

Suijin felt an aura from a distance. She could not pinpoint who or how; she could only see the men in search for that missing woman. “Just stay out of trouble, will you…” she said, and quietly left Kirinmaru sitting alone on the bench, petting the little calico kitten before letting it run off. 

Kitsu, however, stomped at the distance. “Did you just run away? Ugh, these men..they are horrendous! They think my gaze will cause the fishes to faint at first sight…” she added, pinching the cheek fat out of Kirinmaru.

“...I…” Kirinmaru found a satisfaction in his hunger that has never been felt for weeks or even months since he transformed into a human. Perhaps it was loneliness or the kindness of strangers. “Sorry…shall we continue that…”

Kitsu huffed a little.

“Of course, I am more than happy to get over this matter….”

However, the call from one of the men shook Kirinmaru’s reality. “Hey! Beauty? Your tongue must be tied…”

“Oh…I…” Kirinmaru forced himself to hide his Adam’s apple underneath the fan that Kitsu hastily passed out. One of the men sniggered at him.

“How unusual…but her eyes are of an unusual colour, like leeks…” Peals of laughter echoed in the male villagers. “Say, Beauty, recite us a poem! That would be interesting…” 

Kitsu frowned quietly. “Oh please don’t, Nishi…please…” Kirinmaru quickly thought of one in his head, and recited it abruptly in his mouth, scratching his head.

“Out in the fields this autumn day, they're busy reaping grain….” Kirinmaru forced himself to take deep breaths to recite the poem taught by a haughty woman in his youth. “I sought for shelter ’neath this roof. But fear I sought in vain,—” glancing over at Midoriko looking disoriented in that space.

“Oi!!” The male villager did not bother to hear Kirinmaru finishing the poem, shuddering at the sight of the group cowering over Midoriko, to which he mumbled the line, “‘My sleeve is wet with rain.’ 

“This lady,” he heard a man say, “she is a beauty…” Kirinmaru found himself chewing his lip back and forth, giving a slap to the burly man. 

The man gave a rueful chuckle. “Feisty…well wait until I…” Kitsu quickly stared down at that burly man. “Hey…do you want me to cut your tongue and display it in front of your friends?”

The burly man mumbled to his friend to leave them be, ignoring Kirinmaru’s advice, hovering Midoriko like hawks in front of an innocent rabbit, only entertaining a pair of lecherous shopkeepers, which Kirinmaru tried to recall another poem, while Kitsu yelled at Midoriko.

“Oh Lady priestess, can you save us from the men that stalk us? Just make some excuse…”

//////

Suijin quietly made herself comfortable in a small teahouse to observe that ‘woman’, and pondered over the random calico kitten walking over to her side. Why are they here when I want to escape? She thought to herself. Suijin felt a calm aura within the trio, with Midoriko frowning over that sight. “Hey kitty….you felt familiar…” Slowly she realised that the priestess must be touched by Mahiruma-sama’s aura. 

“That is great…me masquerading as a human who has some issues and that woman…I never see someone with a healthy appetite…”

But that companion—the priestess—Midoriko-sama of that ‘woman’ seemed lost, by how she looked at ‘her’. Suijin forced herself to rub the kitten’s fur. “Mahiruma, that is peculiar of you. Why did you enrapture a priestess? You must be lonely…” 

However, the kitten went away, and Suijin felt another prick in her aura.

And that colour seems odd.

Like it is bright green, but it is embodied by dark veins.

Sorry, Kusu. I am out of my league, I suppose to dwell, but maybe.

Quietly, Suijin scampered out of the alleyway, following Midoriko, huffing her cheeks, only to be distracted by a tanalising peach at the old lady's counter. 

“Young lady…you seem interested in that. This morning my husband plucked this from our garden…take…it…”

Suijin quickly snapped her fingers. “Will do…” she replied, leaving the women with heaps of gold; watching her amused reaction made Suijin’s heart warm.

“Now to go to the inn, to hear that commotion…”

//////

“Thank the gods you are back, Mii-chan…” Kitsu proclaimed loudly, quickly wiping off the itchy makeup from her face, with the fancy robes, only to see Sakura giving a grimacing face. “It seems that I lost the bet…because basically men…” Midoriko tried to think about what had happened for the past few days since she went for a stroll away from Kouta’s naming day.

Meanwhile, Kirinmaru felt shame in his heart, watching Midoriko chew her lip a little over some horrid thought, hiding his face underneath the fan. “Sorry…I…” 

Midoriko sighed again. “Never mind. I think we should move forward. I hate to stay behind, and plus…I have a feeling that staying in this village may bring some unnecessary emotion…” 

Kitsu sighed to herself. “As you wish, Mii-Chan…otherwise, Lover Boy will be distracted by that baby friend of ours…”

Quietly, they ascended to the entrance of the inn, seeing their makeup fade from the sweat from the day.  Midoriko gave a small gasp. Oh no, did I really miss that celebration? “ Oh, should I go back to them???” Midoriko blurted to Kitsu; however, she thought of that image of Kirinmaru holding the sweet babe so tightly. “No…it is…” 

Suijin puffed her cheeks. “Wait…priestess, what is with you and that…” She looked over that ‘woman’, who was that handsome man. Kirinmaru’s green eyes looked sadly at Midoriko as he walked over to another room to take off his clothes.

Hold on….

Suijin chewed her lip, feeling the blood ooze from her tongue alongside the fragrant taste of the peach in her mouth. Is this Koushirou-sama’s lost son?? Wait…that woman is…Oh…that makes things complicated…. 

Did he decide that the Beast King lineage is too heavy?

Wait. Wait. Wait. Do not judge. Maybe he is not. Maybe he is cursed by the gods to have green eyes and have that aura?

Midoriko pouted in the corner, enamoured by Kirinmaru’s sad eyes. “You know what, I would be more than happy to kill a youkai, and earn some money. What you did with the babe dried up our resources; I have could gotten us a nice spot to eat…” 

Kitsu scratched her head, as she took off the robes from her body, to reveal her muscular arms and thighs. “Maybe if we can get that contract done, I will allow Lover Boy and you to have some time together alone. It is obvious…I lost…”

Midoriko grumbled to herself. No way! Nishi is such a blockhead. Why does he want to pursue me? I am nothing.

“How about your bleeds, Kitsu-chan….” A fake laugh echoed in the room. “It could happen anytime, after all, and yours will come after mine…”

Kitsu shrugged her shoulders. “Yeah…should it happen, we will just stay down at the inn…”

Suijin sighed to herself. “Lady Priestess…you are a blockhead….that slayer even knew your feelings…” She puffed her cheeks. “Humans can be imbeciles…” She felt Kusu’s aura again calling for help.

“Seems I have to plant in the humans a plan, to satisfy the bloodlust of the slayer, but to open the lady’s heart…” Suijin rubbed her chin with her fingers, only glancing at Kirinmaru pouting, leaning at the side of the window. “And I need to check why Kusu is calling me…” Quietly Suijin transfigured a little brush from her hand, and gold-flecked paper in her other. She wrote ‘Come here’ and let it fly to the wind, to stick on his back.

A voice echoed in his mind.

Come here. 

Come here.

Come here.

Come here.

Kirinmaru felt a wave of energy in his body, to which he found his feet moving back and forth in a strange dance. His thoughts were flooded with Midoriko’s strength at delivering baby Kouta, and the grit when she released that wolf shikigami to that horrid demon, that arrow that reached to the fallen beast king’s body.

Something is coming.

Something is coming.

Something is coming

Kirinmaru watched Midoriko and Kitsu, both unaware of his missing presence, busily packing the goods for the next journey to come, finding himself dancing to death. 

Kirinmaru found his lungs growing out of breath from this strange dance, only to land himself sitting at the roots of the infamously barren tsubaki tree and Suijin sitting next to him. “I apologise if I have mistaken you as a woman…”

/////

Suijin quietly observed Kirinmaru’s handsome features, allowing the space to settle the pressure and the panic in his body, passing him a stick of dango to him. “Why? It is nothing to apologise…” 

Kirinmaru found himself touching the leaves of the barren tsubaki tree. “...It is something minor…but…”

“The ‘buts’ is simply a start, I heard that your slayer friend needs a job…and I need your tongue to save a friend of mine…”

Kirinmaru chewed his lip, not realising that the rouge never left his soft lips.

“Who are you, to ask me to speak on behalf of you…” Suijin quietly allowed herself to settle down. “A stranger that heeds a call…” she replied, upon which she quietly transformed her plainclothes into lovely silk robes, and her coral earrings shimmered in the sunlight. Kirinmaru quickly rubbed his fringe back and forth.

“Apologies, fair goddess, I should have not talked so casually. If that punishment is fitting— please, unbound my heart…” 

Suijin rolled her eyes. “You do not need to….dear friend…” she answered, allowing Kirinmaru the space to eat the dango. “I am not cruel, like Mahiruma-o-Kami, the patron of that damn town. I feel that something is troubling you and your priestess companion…henceforth I will pass you a task…”

“Find why my friend weeps and groans…for my powers are little.” Quietly, Suijin passed him a small charm. “Hold this to your heart, it should lead you to the next direction.”

Kirinmaru stared at the charm. “Uhm, this….” He looked at the elaborate wave-like designs, comforted by its slight warmth. “This…is…nice…Thank you…” Suijin rolled her eyes. “This will come in time, Kirinmaru- you know when it comes…”, unaware of Kirinmaru growing quieter in his steps- reflecting over their shenanigans. Suijin peered over Midoriko paying the innkeeper with the remaining mon,nudging him gently- “Are you going to make your way now, fair goddess…” 

Suijin knew that moony expression in Kirinmaru, she has seen that in her servants when they passed each other in hallways. She purposely made huge steps back and forth, hearing the flute from a nearby passerby

“I would appreciate not being called fair goddess-”,

“You need to make that move on behalf of me.” Suijin shook her head. “Sure the priestess would see me easy out of my plain clothes….”, gazing over Midoriko frowning at the strange presence, giving her the opportunity to exit. “So I will watch you from the sidelines….”, giving a wink. “A mortal….or I say a daiyoukai would be able to figure this out…” she gave that push to Kirinmaru to walk even quicker than before.

“You are…”

Kirinmaru found that dance to be over, and instead he walked normally back to the inn, where Midoriko and Kitsu waited, packed and ready for the next journey. “Shall we go…” 

“Where did you go…” Kitsu pouted quietly. “You look even more dishevelled than before.”

Kirinmaru showed the charm to the girls. “I think I know where we shall go next…I think someone needs our help…”

Kitsu pinched the fat between her nose, closing her eyes in frustration. “What, did some sleazy merchant bribe you into a pilgrimage for a new reincarnation for the goddess of mercy?? Or a new god that used to be a sailor that sacrifices for his people? Because I am….”

Suijin, in her plainclothes, scrunched her eyebrows. Well, this human is sceptical. In fact her appetite for the pancake was dismissed by Kirinmaru’s lucid gaze on Midoriko, passing it to Midoriko. “You may ask why I disappear….” Time is not on my side, and neither is yours.

“I thought that your companions could be useful to me…” Sujin muttered under her breath, crossing her fingers, digging her nails to her skin. Watching him explaining the situation make her desperate, which she glanced upon a small Shishi-odoshi clicking up and down- I wish not to take action, but Kirinmaru…. Suijin closed her eyes,swirling her wrists upn and down in that strange dance. She quietly splashed some water onto Kirinmaru-, soon he felt a surge of confidence in his belly, speaking calmly to the two skeptical girls, with Kitsu holding the pouch to her chest. “I heard rumours that the island has become hell…” Kirinmaru protested quietly. “And…” 

“I was thinking, we should go there, who knows…maybe we could get some mon along the way to fund the repairs in your gears…”

Oh my god the blabbering, Suijin grumbled to herself. I might as well make an appearance to plead my case.

Suijin snapped her fingers to change into her goddess clothes, holding her triton, making a path amidst the stagnant conversation. Midoriko felt a pulse in her veins to see a smirking goddess constantly splashing water at him like a cat drowning in the river. “It seems that my message did not came out clear….” she came in and bowed to them. “Lady Priestess, demon slayer, and brave young man…” Somehow Kirinmaru shivered in fear over the change in Suijin’s aura. “My friend is in danger, and you three are the best at that…” Quietly, she held their hands. “But for a moment…I shall speak my truth to you…” The trio found themselves cool from the bodies of water; they saw sea creatures gawking at them, and Kirinmaru waved at the baby whale floating along with its mother.

Midoriko found her reiki easing at the sight of that woman. “You are a goddess….why find us…I…”

“Well I could easily solve the issue, but I think…” Suijin gave a wink. “I will give you three a go…let me tell you a tale, humans: a huge storm ravished the seas, causing many travellers to be lost. Only two barely survived the wreck, and they pleaded to any god to allow them to follow their friends into the watery depths. However, destiny has its edges—for a turtle rose amidst the seas. One of the survivors thanked whoever blessed them with that unusual sight, saying that they would devote themselves to that thing…”

Midoriko frowned at that tale that Suijin told them. 

“Of course, in gratitude, the two survivors built their shrines over that turtle, one devoted to that one deity, and the other….”

“But why call us….” Kirinmaru raised an eyebrow. “Maybe it could be simply that the turtle just happened to be here…”

Suijin grinned to herself. “I know; I would be the same. This is where you have to unfold the truth from the fairytale…” Out from the water tunnel, Suijin, Kirinmaru, Kitsu, and Midoriko stood on dry land, and Kitsu found herself sulking at their patron’s words. “And yes, demon slayer, you will be rewarded heavily…enough mon to last you many decades…”

Kitsu grinned quietly. “Alright…” she raised her eyebrow. “Kami-sama, sounds like a fair deal, we have losses thanks to Lover Boy”, she added, taking all of the fans out, flexing her muscles for action. “I am ready for a fight…”

Suijin felt a prick in her aura, as the trio—Kitsu, Kirinmaru and Midoriko—descended upon the land. To Kirinmaru’s delight, they saw a floating island so beautiful coming out from the scrolls of youkai painters who painted strange lands and strange people. The intricacy of the shrines long ago intertwined with the lush forests, with people walking up and down, dealing with their daily lives, and dressed in the finest of silks.

“Suijin-sama!!”

Slowly two men, one wearing a taupe robe, and another wearing a dazzling sapphire robe, bowing to the goddess. “Finally you came!!” Suijin felt a prickling in her aura on both. “Kusu-sama would be pleased with your presence.”

Strange; how did they know my name… Suijin thought to herself. Please play along with me, humans.

“We have guests?” the taupe man shouted loudly, causing a flurry of steps to come down to the floor, Kirinmaru glared at the pagentry of the servants announcing the arrival of guests.

“Guests?”

A myriad of voices echoed the same word over and over again, it feels so hypnotising. 

“Yes, guests?” A little boy peered through the crowd to see the trio. “What shall we do Mister, should we sing, should we dance…should we…” The taupe man ruffled his hair. “Wait, let the other host speak, my child…”

The sapphire man giggled at him. “Yes, guests…” he answered, and his hands transfigured into a basket of fine clothes and food.

“Welcome…”

Kirinmaru smiled sheepishly at the warmth of their hosts. “Oh…Thank you…” Suijin nudged Kirinmaru to not join them, but the goddess’ words had no effect.  A group of servants gave Kirinmaru and Kitsu the finest food, at which Kirinmaru grabbed the best peach, chomping it so happily. 

“Welcome, fine guests…” their hosts said, and they looked over at Midoriko, holding a bow and arrow and pointing it at their faces. “Who is this cute lady?? A lover??” Kirinamru found his face burning scarlet from this thought, and Midoriko quickly laid down her arrows. 

“...I…I….” 

The man with the taupe robes spoke in a sing-song voice. “Apologies for the rudeness of our servants. I am Ousuke…young lady…” Midoriko’s bows and arrows quickly transfigured into elaborate clothing: a kimono with many layered sleeves, at which the companion wearing the sapphire robes clapped gleefully, when he snapped his fingers to change Midoriko’s robes into that outfit. “That is Heki, my friend…it has been a while since we had guests on this island. Of course, weapons are not needed here,” he added, allowing a female servant to separate both Kirinmaru and Midoriko, with her eyes widened over him enjoying the simple pleasures given by their servants. “And you seem tired, young lady. Perhaps you should come to the onsen…” Heki chuckled. 

“It would lift your spirits…”

Little did Suijin know that she was left at the edge of the land, watching the men grinning coldly at her, while pushing the trio to that island. The buildings grew so interconnected in Kirinmaru’s mind that it could be a dream, if he wanted it to; he could wish it would last forever, even if it meant he would be spirited away and never touch on that same land again.

A barrier formed upon the floating island, pushing Suijin out of the way, with Heki’s smirk looking over the hapless goddess.

“It seems these two know I am coming.” Suijin chewed her lip back and forth. So much for good hospitality. Pacing herself up and down, she bit her tongue to figure her next step. “That is not good…” However, an idea came to mind as she took off one of her earrings, and quietly pressed it on her forehead, feeling the flurry of her goddess aura receding like the waves. And she felt human, burying the earring in the sand.

Stay watch, Lady priestess and friends. I have a bad feeling for the duo.

///

“Young lady…” Ousuke nudged Midoriko quietly. “What made you want to travel far to our island…” Midoriko did not reply, observing how the buildings intersected with one another, leaving a lingering shrine swaying in the breeze.

“I…I…I…”

Midoriko found herself chewing her lip up and down. Where is Suijin? she wondered, eyes searching over Kitsu and Kirinmaru, only to see a tranquil onsen bubbling up and down, with the falling maple leaves dancing in the water. 

Ousuke bowed quietly to Midoriko. “Enjoy….” she said, and quickly, she took off the robes, dipping her toes to the water, enjoying the sweet aroma. 

Her mind thought over Mahiruma’s words regarding Kirinmaru, which were not real. She stared at the flowing ebony locks making strange pools on it. And as if out of a dream, a plate of peach buns was laid at the side. Kitsu-chan…..I hope you are alright…. And she quickly snatched a peach bun, enjoying its sweet bean paste.

////

Kitsu grumbled quietly to herself as she stood outside of the onsen. “Ok…ok…” The lights seemed to blind her eyes. “Nishi…where the f**k are you…” In frustration, she plopped down on the floor to see another girl at the side. Kitsu furrowed her eyebrows to see the goddess again. 

“It has been a while, Slayer…” Suijin curled herself next to Kitsu. “I am sorry…things got…” 

Quietly, the other coral earring slowly transfigured in her hands. Kitsu mumbled to herself. “I do not know, why call us? You are a powerful goddess, so why choose us…”

Suijin held her hand.

“I suppose at moments, I feel like I lost humanity and then again, I am always searching for it…” 

Suijin felt a knot in her stomach, so she focused on closing her eyes. Keep fighting Kusu, I know you are stronger than that.  

Kitsu shook her head. “Maybe…” she murmured, looking over the changing skies, blinded by the otherworldly light, unaware that the goddess grew ever so still amidst the chaos. She kept tossing that coral earring like a mon from her pouch. “Don’t get your hopes too high...I don’t think it will be that easy…”

/////

Kirinmaru quietly settled himself on the building, staring at the wide open, shocked at how big, how blue, how beautiful that world was. He felt that he could shut his eyes and be transpired to Midoriko’s side, only to see the lands drift off. Soon a young lady came in carrying the tastiest of goods and the finest of sakes. 

“Young master…”

Kirinmaru found himself blushing at that sight of that young woman; he swore that it could be Midoriko herself, but instead resigned to that reality that it was a servant with vacant eyes, pouring that drink for him. “May I ask how old are you? And who is she, the one whose face made you blush?”

“Maybe like 25 springs…” Kirinmaru shrugged a little. “I…that woman is Midoriko….” He happily took the drinks back and forth. “There is a strength in her…but yet she has yet to cast her eyes on me…” Little did Kirinmaru know that long, invisible strings were stuck to his clothes, as he continuously drank and ate the tantalising food.

The servant clapped cheerfully on his declaration. “Then we shall bring you two together! Perhaps a meal or a stroll by the pool….” 

Kirinmaru looked over at the side to the robes which he had used when he masqueraded as a female. He actually won that bet to spend time with Midoriko, and yet he feared that pure love as an act of defiance would be the end of her life. 

“...May I ask you a favour…” Kirinmaru quietly passed the giggling servant that robe. “Can you pass this to Midoriko…for it would best fit her rather than me…” 

The servant pouted to Kirinmaru. “No I cannot. As a man, if you want to pass that gift, it must be face to face…”

Kirinmaru furrowed his eyebrows. “What…if…” But quickly, the servant chuffed the huge dango stick into his mouth. 

“You can and you will…”

////

Meanwhile, Midoriko held a cup of tea in her hands, relishing that warmth, and admiring the blueness of the ocean. Ousuke came quietly, holding the robes in his hands, and looked at Midoriko. “Young lady,” he said, “you seem to be lost…” 

“Maybe I am…” she replied, looking over at the reflection of tea marred by her face. “I was told by…” Her eyes widened in horror when Ousuke came into her room with a kind smile. 

“Sorry, I should not be saying my thoughts out loud, perhaps I am condemned to that blindness…”

Ousuke quietly nudged himself to her side, helping himself to the tea. “Well, there is a spring, young lady, where you can bathe. And, apparently, it reveals your heart…”

Reveals your heart?

That seems suspicious?

“If you feel alone, I can create companions to watch over you…” Quietly, Ousuke took two of the sweets and transfigured them into two companions dressed in pastel colours like the sweets themselves. While holding a grin, Ousuke spun an invisible thread to hold Midoriko into this land.

The companions bowed to Midoriko.

“Lady priestess…” one of the ladies dressed in pink giggled at her. “You looked weary…go to the waters…” 

Midoriko grinned quietly. “No,” she answered, “I am fine…” However, the smell of sweets seduced Midoriko into their sweet companionship. Maybe Kitsu-chan would not know such sweet friendship.

“You should…” the other dressed in mugwort green cried out happily, holding Midoriko tightly by the hand. “It must be lonely!!!”

Midoriko felt a blush creeping in her face and shoulders. “I suppose so. Nishi can never hear me…or Kitsu-chan….” 

Ousuke clapped cheerfully. “Splendid! Enjoy yourselves, we will make a dinner just for you and…that…lover…of yours…” He snapped his fingers to pull the two chirpy girls to Midoriko’s side. “These girls will accompany you, as well.” 

At those words, Midoriko found herself relaxing at the inn, only to hear a quiet voice in her ears.

That voice that fought against the tides.

Priestess. You must not fall into those luxuries.

Midoriko shook her head as one of the girls pulled her out. “Hurry! Lady priestess…we do not have the time….”

What. Midoriko questioned herself, finding herself compelled by the quiet voice. These are nothing but illusions…I…I… 

The other lady gave Midoriko a slap to her face, stuffing her face with a tasty peach bun. “Why are you troubled, lady priestess…”

Midoriko shook her head, unable to feel the invisible string tugging around her body. “I do not know, I feel something is…” 

The companion giggled to her. “There is nothing…” 

Soon they followed a path, where one of her companions sang a strange tune. “O travellers’ eyes be open to the island that veiled itself.” 

And the other one shouted loudly to Midoriko, “Oh Lady priestess, we are friends now, and we shall reveal our names for you, for you will never be alone…”

The one in the pastel pink kimono chirped happily. “I am Erena!” and the other companion hugged her by the shoulders. “I am Mamisa!” Their eyes widened in joy over that glistening spring. Girlish giggles filled the air, as they took off their clothes, making themselves comfortable in the water, alluring the hesitant Midoriko to the cool waters with them splashing water at each other. “Come! It would be fun!”

She huffed her cheeks, fearful of anyone, especially Kirinmaru, peering through to see her naked body. Only Kitsu, in her sisterly virtue, could see her naked—her body may be a pillar of justice and power, but she was still a girl.

A girl with gritted teeth.

“She looks so sad…” Marmisa whispered to Erena.

 “Yes…” 

Erena looked over the beautiful landscape. “She must drink the sweet drink of truth, it is bad that she is bottling that feeling to herself…”

Midoriko gulped to herself over that snide conversation between Erena and Marmisa. “By the way, what is that sweet drink of truth…” she asked as she wandered to that serene pool of water. In that moment she forgot about addressing her concerns to Suijin or the strange cry of help. The water seemed so cool under her ankles, and looking over the trees, her brain soon wandered to the birds making a nest in one of the lush trees. She thought for that moment of Kirinmaru being gentle to baby Kouta, as he lifted him up from Midoriko’s arms and tried to burp him.

I think, in another life, Nishi would have made an amazing father. 

That moment, Midoriko stared at her reflection of the pond, imagining in that reflection a small child dangling his legs upon Kirinmaru’s shoulder, and Kirinmaru making silly faces to make that child laugh. Midoriko found herself imagining that she gripped his hand tightly in deep reverence of the mother of his child, which resulted in a hiccup from her stomach.

No, I cannot be thinking of these things. I have placed my vows to never marry or bear a child. 

Erena and Mamisa gave girly claps to her. “Lady priestess, you cannot simply come to the water, without taking off your clothes, then how do you see the truth.” Erena gestured herself to feel her breasts, and somehow that image made Midoriko shiver over that heinous thought.

Oh god if anyone finds me doing this, I would be stoned to death.

Forcing herself to be awake from that thought, Midoriko quickly took off her clothes, and swam around the pool. No it cannot be. It cannot be. 

Wait, Kitsu-chan told me that a woman must lay herself bare in front of a man, to make a child. 

No one would want to lay with me.

Strangely in Midoriko’s mind, that companion Erena quietly morphed to Kirinmaru looking over the beautiful sea, half naked, his muscles taut, and his green eyes looking at her lovingly at her naked form, his teeth biting his thumb slightly. Midoriko’s face soon reddened with embarrassment with that thought.

Gods. Gods. Gods.

Subconsciously Midoriko started to feel the curve of her breasts, mimicking Erena’s movements, thinking how Kirinmaru would caress her breast tenderly and his mouth grazing over that taut nipple. 

Oh shit. 

No, do not think of that, if Nishi slipped himself between my…

Midoriko’s hand desperately snaked between her legs, feeling its slickness in her folds with her taut fingers. She knew, at nights where they would camp together, if Kitsu was undersimulated from the youkai fight, she would use her fingers and furiously rub that nub between her legs to forget about that fight. It proved some relief for Kitsu, so why not for Midoriko, a holy priestess herself, to chase away the thoughts of Nishi? 

Midoriko forced herself to shut her eyes, indulging on that thought of their bodies slick, and writhing with that need to bear a healthy child, by pinching the sensitive nub, and pushing her fingers inside her weeping slit to fill that void, imagining Kirinmaru’s hands touching her nether regions.

Midoriko muttered his name under her breath. “Nishi…I…” as she took out that slicked hand  from her folds to squeeze her breast, rolling that sensitive nipple, and her other hand caving into her mound, constantly rubbing it up and down, thinking of Kirinmaru giving thrusts to her body, determined to fill her belly with child, making her scream into the heavens.

Little did she know that Kitsu came down to the pond chewing her lip furiously, actually tossing a small talisman to the pond, dissolving it to a huge abyss. “What a show you have put on, Mii-chan…” Midoriko’s eyes widened with shock at Kitsu's frankness. 

Where are Erena and Mamisa?   “Do not hide from me, Mii-chan…” Kitsu chuckled to herself, grabbing her wet clothes to drape her body.  “I am guessing you are thinking of Nishi since you saw him holding the baby; then, he would consume you like a feast…”

“….I…”

Kitsu grumbled to herself. “Ugh, Nishi… I appreciate that you have not taken advantage of Mii-chan!!!” She bit her tongue over that man; if she had a choice, she would slice his nether regions, gleeful that Nishi would never spread his seed to Midoriko or basically anyone.

“Speaking of Nishi…do you know where he is…” 

Midoriko sulked quietly. “I do not know…” she replied, trying to reel herself from that encounter in the pond. “I…I….” 

Kitsu rolled her eyes. This is bad.   

“I thought I heard a voice, but…I might be wrong…that place is nice…what…”

“Well you, Mii-chan, need to stay focused, seeing you playing with your body when we are supposed to be looking for a cure…I think your so-called companions…” Kitsu chuckled to herself. “I sense something fishy about it…but you went head over heels over Nishi. Just stay alert for our sake, can you?…” 

“I…”

However, the pond slowly formed back to life, leaving Kitsu’s grumbles muffled, and the companions Mamisa and Erena frowning quietly at Midoriko’s pouting. “Did you shoo us away?”

“I…I…I…”

Midoriko felt a tug on her back moments ago, leaving her in a daze. “Did I meet someone?” Mamisa held Midoriko’s hand. “Or was it just a dream…” For at that moment, her friend Kistu became a fading light in her sight. 

“No, I bet the pond told its secrets. Perhaps a good meal will lift your spirits…” 

Meanwhile, Kitsu could not help but pound at that barrier, only leaving her more frustrated. “Shit, I could see it, I could see it, but Mii-chan, I feel she has been allured by these demons…” 

Suijin came in quietly, also frustrated. “Yes I feel the same way too…” she said, and Kitsu yelped loudly at the sight of Suijin observing the pond transfiguring back and forth.

“There is something that binds everyone to this island, to make some fragments…” Suijin mumbled to herself. “Your friend should be awake but she is not…” Suijin chewed her lip.

Kusu. Please show us so we can save you.

//////////

Kirinmaru found himself happy to sleep in the comfortable inn, with the aroma of seawater perfuming the room. He felt his bones being healed from the comfortable waters he bathed in and the nourishing food in his stomach.

Perhaps for that moment, he wished that he could stay here forever, without any worries in the world.

And yet something is missing.

Kirinmaru found himself laying down in the flower patches, to see his mother walking around. “Come here, my boy,” she said, and he found himself running in these vast gardens, unaware of the muffled voices in the courts of his father. 

“Mother! Mother! Mother!” He found himself holding a Shiretoko violet in his hand. 

She only gave a small smile. “How beautiful…” Her voice wobbled, allowing him to push a strand to fit the small white flowers in her long hair. “How kind, shall we go to the mountains should your father be able to bring us…” However another voice called him, which a young Kirinmaru walked so quickly to find a makeshift pond in his mother’s garden to see someone struggling with strings. 

“Help me, the priestess … find a huge pond where the Shiretoko violets danced…”

Kirinmaru muttered under his breath. “Where…the Shiretoko Violets danced…” and he found his hakama soaked in tears. Mother loved these in illness, and his father would run to all corners of the earth to grow these, though not bright in memory. 

Though Kirinmaru stared at the robes at the side, a servant called him quietly, passing him brightly coloured robes. “Honoured guest, you must be famished…have dinner with us…”

Perhaps the Shiretoko violets could wait. After all, it feels like towering giants in his mind.

Quietly, Kirinmaru took those robes in his hand, caressing the silk on his face. “Yes…Thank you…”

—

Meanwhile Midoriko went back to the room where she found herself sulking over this matter. Why is that feeling for Nishi consuming her like a flame? 

Nishi, you are simply a friend, and companion.

Midoriko shut off moments that had become waking ghosts in her mind; she watched moonlight accentuating his lovely features, and heard the whistling sound from his breaths.

Or his quiet tears when he held baby Kouta so tightly, weeping over such a precious moment.

That eyes of fear when he danced over that horrid Nue, bravely forgoing what is to come.

Mamisa came here quietly, holding new clothes for her. “Lady priestess, stop pouting; we are on the island of mercy and compassion…” She gave her a squeeze to her shoulder. “Perhaps a meal and entertainment will lift your spirits…”

Midoriko resignedly sighed to herself. “Perhaps…” However, that voice rang in her head. 

The one who hears me…your eyes must be widened to the truth of the island.

The truth. 

The truth.

Midoriko shook her head when she saw Kirinmaru looking peacefully at that sight. “Oh hello…” 

His sweet voice stirred something in her that she hid herself away in shame, which led to Ousuke noticing the melancholy of Midoriko. “What is wrong, my child?”

“I do not know; I saw him at the pond of truth…and…” Midoriko covered her face, looking at Kirinmaru admiring the scenes that were painted on the ceiling, and munching the snacks given to him by the servants. “I…I…” Ousuke rubbed her head. 

“I feel like…I….” Shame writhed in Midoriko’s veins, thinking of how she succumbed to her fantasies, those that become horrid images in her brain. “A girl in love… how beautiful… priestess no matter what…” 

Quietly, they settled themselves in a beautiful banquet hall where Kirinmaru and Midoriko sat quietly, and Kirinmaru nudged Midoriko quietly. “Do you wish to stay at this place forever…”

Midoriko grumbled quietly. “...I…wish…so…It is nice…” forgoing that sight of Kirinmaru making himself comfortable at that matter. “Uhm…How about you…”

“It is…” Kirinmaru was unaware of Ousuke sauntering to Midoriko’s side. 

“Sorry,” Ousuke said, “I need to offer the young lady a drink of truth…” His hands slowly transfigured into a small sake bottle with a picture of an idyllic garden. Midoriko felt her stomach twist, thinking of Mahiruma’s words. I know the sight of that garden any day. 

That bloody god warned me about him.

“Young lady, close your eyes and drink this...” Ousuke snapped his fingers to put Midoriko in a trance, allowing her to taste that sweet ambrosia. 

“It should let you be free…”

At first, Midoriko’s eyes widened over that taste; perhaps she could drown her thoughts of Nishi in her brain, the idea of which made her giggle. “Why thank you…may I have one more…” 

Ousuke grinned quietly. “Yes…but be patient, young lady, there will be tasty food to eat and entertainment to savour a meal.” He allowed the servants to lay her freshly stewed snapper, small rice balls, and seared meat.

Soon a band of musicians and dancers came over the table. Kirinmaru saw a young man with his face painted white reciting something strange.

An island held by mercy and compassion.

It is said that it is drifting in different eons.

However, its mystery has become its paradise, spoken by few. 

O travellers’ eyes, be open to the island that veiled itself.

Kirinmaru found himself smiling over that recital. As he took his chopsticks and chomped on the pieces of fish, he saw Midoriko drinking a lot, giggling profusely at him. “I know…it is nice…can you…” Midoriko glanced at him seductively, quietly taking off her robes. He glanced at the bare curve of her breast, at which he blushed at the sight of a rosy nipple. 

“...Midoriko…I….” 

Quickly, Kirinmaru took Midoriko away, giggling at the sight of him, covering her bare curves with her robe. Her nose detected that sweet scent, as she clawed him like a barnacle to a rock. Her breath tinged with the aroma of sake, mumbling to him. “...I...I…Gods…Nishi…you smell nice…”

“Please hold me…Hold me…”

Kirinmaru was forced to close his eyes, the pond where the Shiretoko violets dance.

The pond where the Shiretoko flowers danced. 

Where the Shiretoko flowers danced.

Maybe she could swim over the waters to quell her thoughts.

“I am holding you, Midoriko…” Kirinmaru swallowed his words. He should not be attached to her. He should not.

The food in their stomachs seemed to be settling strangely, as Kirinmaru quickly ran over the many corners and turns with Midoriko mumbling strange words, as if she was possessed by a youkai. 

Nishi…where are we…can we…

Her hands caressed his sweet lips, pulling his black locks quickly, revealing them to be red, causing a shock to his system.

Midoriko mumbled to Kirinmaru’s hair, laying it like a pillow. What a beautiful colour…

Quickly, Kirinmaru brushed Midoriko’s hand away, allowing the red hair to change back to black, refusing to let her tug at her robes to reveal her breasts. His heart raced to see a massive handful of Shiretoko flowers swaying in the breeze with a pond reflecting both souls’ eyes.

“Midoriko….cool off…” Kirinmaru mumbled to Midoriko, allowing her to walk near the edge of the pond. “Let the water calm your soul…”

“But Nishi….” Midoriko whined at Kirinmaru, fighting against Kirinmaru holding her delicate wrists down, as she tried to strip off her robes, showing her collarbones and the swell of her breasts. “Come to the water, I feel so alone…”

Kirinmaru swallowed the butterflies in his stomach.

“...I…I…”

Kirinmaru laid Midoriko gently on the edge of the pond where she rolled with such glee, giving a mischievous twinkle to him, like a siren upon a rocking boat. The smell of the Shiretoko flowers nearly nauseated his lungs, and yet he soldiered through Midoriko’s giggles to see her feet dip into the water. 

“Oh…Take these robes…They should shield you…should anyone…” Kirinmaru forced himself to run away, from Midoriko stripping down to her bare self, making that strange dance around the swaying Shiretoko violet fields and the water cooling her bare body.

She became that strange goddess again, though her mind swirled to strange fantasies of Kirinmaru dancing with her.

Kirinmaru forced himself to take deep breaths, averting his eyes to Midoriko’s ecstasy. He accidentally bumped his head upon the overgrown branches in the woods, stumbling upon a small shrine. His eyes blinked at the sight of a figure shrouded amidst the wild Shiretoko violets; he felt a string pulling his body to watch it. Irritated by that tug, Kirinmaru quickly found a small knife held by a skeleton of a young man holding upon the shrine, and quickly cut it away, only to see that field gone, with Suijin and Kitsu panting up and down, searching for the duo.

“Wait….” 

(Work done by the amazing Eliza)

Kirinmaru rubbed his eyes, to see Midoriko amidst that beautiful pond, swimming among the cold waters, her eyes vacant of the liquid she drank, only to smile regretfully that he never uttered that confession to her. 

She was that goddess unattainable.

“Hey, you know it is rude to gawk at a woman naked, unless you are her husband on her wedding night.” Kirinmaru glared at Suijin, who snickered. 

“Suijin-sa….” Quickly she took one of her earrings to seal his mouth. 

“Why are you so concerned about her…” 

Kirinmaru shuffled his feet back and forth. “Well…I journeyed with her a lot, and she seems to be well…saw me as nothing…but a…”

Suijin noticed a change in his voice. He sounded consumed by love and conflict.

“Women…women…humans in particular have things that they fear if she gave it easily, she would never get it back. That is how human men built it, which is not true. There are things that are spoken and sometimes unspoken… and I feel…” 

“I can see that you managed to break through something…” Suijin quietly picked up an invisible thread on the ground, only to manifest into a string that flickered gold and red, which was tied to his pinky finger. “Hmmm…do you think these hosts used your feelings to anchor my friend Kusu and Midoriko…and perhaps…” Suijin’s eyes widened with a devilish idea.

“Unless….you tell her that you loved the priestess.” 

Quietly, Suijin pressed the fleshy part of his palm. “Something must have torn you, and you are fearful of overprotecting someone so deep that it consumes you. You should let the person come to you…if she is the one… she will speak to you sincerely with her heart, not her body.”

Kirinmaru resignedly took that advice. Maybe I am just protecting that hurt child within me, that Midoriko became my escape. 

“Maybe I should leave you be…” Suijin said. “It is up to you, what is best for the priestess and you…” Suijin disappeared quietly, only leaving the string visible to his pinky, and Kitsu curled her lip to Kirinmaru, giving him a slap in his face. 

“First of all, Nishi, did you defile my friend with drinks and all…”

Kirinmaru shook his head.

Kitsu pouted miserably. “Alright…” Her stares caused Kirinmaru to shuffle his feet back and forth, seeing how he fiddled the handle of a small knife. “My question is, where the hell did you get that knife from…” 

“I…I…” The handle felt warm in Kirinmaru’s hands, like a mother’s embrace. He looked over the bearer of the knife, holding on to dear life, trying to flesh out the face that disappeared in the shadows, standing in watch over the empty shrine. “I think that person knew that the island was a trap and managed to cut whatever was binding them to this world… a matter if we are here to be awakened or to be dead.”

“Perhaps they have an idea more than we do…”

Quickly, Kitsu grabbed Kirinmaru by the shoulders, leading him away from the shrine. “Hold that knife as if it is like your weapon, Nishi…this may be the ticket out…”

Kirinmaru looked at Midoriko girlishly diving herself into the cold waters, raising her hands to imaginary gods in her brain. 

For that moment, the imaginary goddess that giggled and dived into the waters disappeared in his mind. 

---

“Where am I…” Midoriko heaved quietly; the stars seemed to twinkle lowly on her, and she forced herself to swim away from the current, but only to be consumed by the coldness of the pond. 

That the elixir of truth had become heavy on her shoulders. It did not give comfort to her heavy heart.

She shut her eyes, thinking, where is the source of such possession to love a man like Kirinmaru ? Her reiki pricked but like the ebbs and flows of that same ocean. Her heart built on the fortress that no one could break it down, well…except herself.

She is powerful.

She is the deliverer of justice

She is.

She.

Mahiruma’s sceptical words gnawed at her like a ghost of a lover clinging upon her flesh. What is Nishi to me? He swore I am the projection of his mother.

No, that cannot be.

I cannot be protected.

Strangely, the voices in her head echoed something differently.

Midoriko, think of the possibilities.

Did I drink too much?

Did I sleep too much?

Midoriko forcefully pushed herself up onto dry land, to find hastily folded robes, and another robe: the lavender robes with silhouettes of plum flowers, which she vaguely recognized as the one Nishi wore over the dare. That smell penetrated like the finest perfumes that peddlers tried to persuade her and Kitsu to buy to entice a man. That smell became a projection of Nishi sitting down quietly, reading a love poem to her ear, only to see her face reddened.

Did I behave badly around him? Did I become my favourite ghost? Did I? Did?

Midoriko’s eyes widened to the many strings that entangled her body that she tried to brush away, only to feel choked by their tugging. Wait, there is something wrong? Why did I not detect that feeling earlier? She quickly changed into those robes, fueled by the aroma of Nishi in her brain. She forced herself to search for the source of that prick, only to find a small shrine holding a vaguely carved wooden figure.

Quietly, Midoriko focused her reiki to cleanse the shrine, revealing its woody exterior, crumbled into a sailor holding a turtle in his hand. She held it quietly to hear that voice again. ‘You heard me…the strings that bind you to me…they are not my doing…you need…’

The voice felt pained and she wept.

Where? How? When?

However, the two hosts—Heki and Ousuke—came to Midoriko with frowned expressions. “Seems that you found our truth. Let it be nothing but a faded memory…where different aeons would drift…” Ousuke said, placing a finger on her forehead, and she found herself holding tightly to that figure. 

Midoriko found herself at the dining room where the entertainers spoke that same poem over and over again. “What…What…has happened…” she whispered, grounding herself with that scent, giving a girlish sigh.

“I think the elixir of truth must have pained you…” Heki surrounded Midoriko, passing her a simple meal of congee and condiments. “Did it speak to you…”

Midoriko pursed her lips quietly. “Perhaps…do you know…where is Nishi…” 

Heki’s eyes widened at that request. “I…I….” Giving an abrupt bow over that request, Heki shouted,

“FIND THAT GUEST! FIND THAT GUEST!”

The echoed voices of the servants became like waves on a rock, where they spun to chaos until Midoriko did not know who came in and who left the dining room. The only constant factor was the clothes that she wore, perfumed by his scent, at which she hid her girlish smiles, but instead forced herself to centre her reiki to just find anything.

Anything. 

Anything.

Any…

Underneath the robes, Midoriko constantly rubbed the figure, seeing the strings attached to all of the people in the hall.

Except for Nishi.

Huh, I am not dreaming.

Midoriko felt a tug on that string, forcing herself to look over the servants and residents of the inn. They did not feel alive at all. 

They feel…

They feel…

A knot formed in Midoriko’s stomach, only to be assured by Kirinmaru coming in, with his face caked by dirt and a soft smile. “Are you all right…”

Midoriko withheld the blush in her face. “I guess…” Gods I was a fool to him, running around young and drunk in the pool.  

Kirinmaru quietly shuffled himself to her side, holding her hand. “Do you wish to stay there forever, despite what bound us to this place? I think there is something magical here…”

Midoriko noticed a small knife tucked underneath his robe, feeling the pulsating force.

“Young master.” Heki bowed to Kirinmaru and Midoriko. “Hope you are comfortable here…”

Kirinmaru forced himself to lie beneath his teeth. “Yes I am…” he said, constantly rubbing small circles on Midoriko’s back. “The food is wonderful and the views are….”

“Something out of a fairytale….”

Kirinmaru resigned himself to the fact that fairytales formed in his mind could hold such half-truths, which few who had an open heart could believe it. Heki smirked quietly. “Speaking about fairytales, can we entertain you and the lady with one…” Midoriko wished to protest over that matter, but Kirinmaru held her hand tightly; his emerald eyes burned her brain. 

“If you wish…”

However, Heki gave a cruel smile, clenching his fists to pull both of them, changing their dirtied clothes into something elaborate. Midoriko was given a small dagger—pointing its blade at his throat—and Kirinmaru only holding a broken glass and a fan. He found his heart thumping, and he prayed to any god that existed to stop this carnage. “And the woman you loved will be the last thing you see, for she will cover her breasts with your blood, unless she speaks to you about her undying love.”

Heki’s voice sounded so different: no longer a sweet host, but someone who was eager to savour the gruesome show. “Young lady, young lady, young lady…” Midoriko swore under her breath. She indeed swallowed that fear of being loved; her eyes welled with tears at that feeling. “If you love him, you must kill that soul that bound you; he would not suffer and so will you….”

“...I…I…I…” Midoriko tried to channel herself not to plunge the blade into Kirinmaru’s heart. “I am not in love…I will…I…” However, a wave of fear and sadness collapsed to her to mere exhaustion. She tried to channel her reiki to remove the dagger from her hand. “Do not lie…Heki…The elixir of truth…it hurts…it hurts…”

“That truth would bind you, and his body and yours shall be the ground that will feed us….”

Kirinmaru felt a tremble in Midoriko’s body, and the impenetrable and powerful priestess shuddered in fear. He saw Suijin and Kitsu hiding amidst the manipulated servants and guests, with Kitsu blowing holy salt at one of the guards until he screamed in agony, causing them to swarm the two girls.

A voice echoed in the blade. “You must act.” 

And he knew he had to calm Midoriko’s fears.

“Midoriko….I…” Without any thought, Kirinmaru looked at Midoriko lovingly, his emerald eyes burning her soul. “Breathe….” She closed her eyes, shutting herself from his gaze. “It will be alright…” He quietly caressed his lips to hers.

Trust me.

Midoriko heaved quietly, allowing that kiss, only to grip the rough ends of his hair, unaware that Kirinmaru cut off Midoriko’s string when he saw Kitsu coming into the dining room. “You will pay for this…” she shouted, as she swung her fans upon the hosts, and Suijin came in, raising her trident up to purge the evil around this luxurious inn.

“CLEANSE THE HALLS THAT ARE LITTERED WITH JYAKI!”

The hosts, Heki and Ousuke, became corpses, and the servants became nothing but mere paper dolls. The buildings soon crumbled except for a small shrine, now cleansed from the parasitic forces. Midoriko found her eyes bursting into stars at each caress of Kirinmaru’s lips, tasting his sweetness, and the aroma of him—that she could picture herself running those fields without any care in the world like the little girl she once was, and his hands slowly letting go of hers.

And quietly they—Suijin, Midoriko, and Kitsu—found themselves drifting onto a small beach. Midoriko felt a shiver down her spine, missing that smell of Kirinmaru. Kitsu vented out her frustration to the crumbling hosts’ bodies, and Suijin sighed in relief to see the clear skies.

“Priestess, you have something in you that made the island’s power stronger…” Suijin quietly recalled to Midoriko. “I am guessing you have feelings for Nishi…” she added, allowing Midoriko to have that space to stare at the elaborate embroidery in Kirinmaru’s robes. 

Midoriko did not look at Suijin’s smug expression. “No, it is the island’s power, Suijin-kami-sama,” she replied and forced herself to swallow the butterflies in her stomach, with that mere thought of Kirinmaru in her mind. “…and I am foolish, great goddess…”  

Suijin noticed how her hands quietly traced the fabric of the robes that Kirinmaru wore, biting her bottom lip quietly, as if fighting that smell that penetrated her mind. “I do not think so…it is just like a dream…” 

However, Kitsu barked at Suijin and Midoriko, breaking away Midoriko’s melancholy. “Speaking of Nishi, where the hell is he???”

Midoriko shook her head. “All I recall is that he told me to breathe; his face was red like a lady’s rouge. And…”

Kitsu rolled her eyes. “Whatever, it is not the time to wax poetry…” she snapped, noticing Midoriko digging her fingers into her flesh. “Suijin, you better tell us what is going on…” 

Suijin scratched her head slightly. “I do not know…and I am not here to intervene; that would be Mahiruma-kami’s job, if he intends to…” She only saw Midoriko staring at the ocean waves and the sound of seagulls echoing in her ears. 

////

Kirinmaru’s body tossed far away, with his black hair strewn with seaweed and broken threads. He lay in the sand, holding the dagger in his hand. The waves slowly came over Kirinmaru’s body and he found himself drifting to an eternal sleep. He wished for Midoriko: to hold her hand, to save him from the sea bed, and a head upon which to rest. A thought ran through his head on that descent into the abyss.

My personal goddess trembles in fear. 

“Nishi…I know you are not human…”

Kirinmaru’s eyes widened in shock over that rumbling voice, feeling the ire of a disgruntled god, Mahiruma, at the prospect of him falling in love with a deadly thing. “Do you want to hurt me…” He tried to force himself to stare at the creature that came over him. 

“No…” the turtle bellowed to him, staring at him quietly. “I am not like Mahiruma-Okami…he seems sceptical over love...you…it consumes you…did you tell her that you love her?”

“…I…” Before Kirinmaru could finish his sentence, he found himself sinking down into the waters to see the face of the turtle. “Who are you?” Kirinmaru found himself calm in these waters, like a child floating in his mother’s womb. 

“I am Kusu….”

“I was foolish to allow these two men to climb to my shell to save them from a wrecking storm, only to bring people to their dreams to be their tomb….” Their face seemed so wise and sincere, looking at Kirinmaru, who was fighting the force of the waters. “I want to thank you three for saving me through your actions…I would like to say this to you…”

“Shut your heart from all fear and doubt. What Mahiruma-O-Kami said is nothing...or what obstacles in the past that writhed you, you loved the girl.”

Kirinmaru closed his eyes, allowing Kusu to use the flipper to touch his forehead. A thought ran in his head, like a sweet koto melody which his mother had tried to muster in the long-gone gardens. He indeed loved Midoriko: there was no denying it, as her strength brought lightness to his heart.

Kirinmaru’s dirty clothes slowly transformed into something beautiful: a deep Prussian robe with designs of swirling waves and flowers. The feel of silk on his body soothed his fears, and that knife that protected him from such harm dissolved in the water—only left with its hlit—changing it into a beautiful turtle ornament that held his robes together.

“And nothing could stand in your way…”

Kusu smiled at Kirinmaru. “I will bless thee with happiness in your life, brave friend…you are welcome as a friend of Kusu…”

Quietly, Kirinmaru found himself catching his breath; he trudged over the beach to hear the squabbling of Kitsu and Suijin on that matter. Midoriko looked at him, with a word that hung upon her lips upon that handsome figure.

You.

Without telling Midoriko what happened underneath these waters, Kirinmaru gripped her shoulders, his words breathless to her. “My Midoriko, my dearest goddess…I am happy you…” He quietly caressed his lips to hers, which grew deeper and deeper as Midoriko melted into his arms, only to be disrupted by Kitsu’s yellings. 

“Nishi…what has gotten into you…” Kitsu growled at the new couple, leaving Midoriko breathless at that handsome sight. “WHAT THE HELL DID YOU CALL MIDORIKO? YOUR PERSONAL GODDESS??…THAT IS CREEPY.”

Midoriko cannot help to rub her lips with her callused fingers, to glance at Kirinmaru again, he somehow look so handsome with his new kimono-with her eys fixated on his emerald eyes blazed through her soul.

She want to breathe into that comforting scent of flowers that perfumed his body. 

No I cannot.

Her hands trembled to reach to the lines in his jaw, confused whenever to slap him for such a rash action or to be grateful that they could share that moment when not tangled in that curse. However Midoriko’s eyes trailed to Kitsu’s disapproving gaze, and Suijin looking over the bright sky, illuminating them-giving a thumbs up to them. Midoriko whispered to Kirinmaru harshly “Did you just kiss me?", feeling the burn in her cheeks, searching for a sign of reassurance. However, he gave Midoriko the space to catch her breath, which he could hear her mutter to his ear “Great…now Kitsu thinks we are f**king…”  He gripped her hand even tighter than before, enjoying her sweet lips so much that they became like sake in his mouth. Little did Midoriko know that her eyes softened at Kirinmaru, causing Suijin to step aside to see that grand show of affection.

“I do not know…” Kirinmaru found his feet digging into the sand, looking at Midoriko’s new clothes. Once, they were a way to hold Kitsu’s bet, but now they are draped on her body. “These clothes…they suit you, they make you so….”  Midoriko found herself trembling over the simplicity of his words.

“No…I…”

Kirinmaru held her hand tightly. “…beautiful…and I wish you to keep it. It would be no use to me in this world.” Kirinmaru seemed to reciprocate her feelings, though he is burning on the inside from his bubbling yoki.

Midoriko raised an eyebrow. “Of course I will." She bit her tongue, fearful of Kitsu's next reaction towards these new lovers. “Do you expect me to wear that?”

“…Yes…”

Midoriko frowned at Kirinmaru. “Whatever you do…do not look at me when I change into those robes, otherwise I will pluck your eyes out…” 

Kirinmaru quietly whispered in her ear. “And I will gladly receive it, as I love you ardently, Midoriko.”

Suddenly, Midoriko found her mind shutting down at that confession. “I think we should go now…I hate this place….” Suijin quietly took the other earring and placed it on her ear, noticing how Midoriko’s gaze grew softer at Kirinmaru, and withheld a giggle in her mouth.

“You mortals did well at undoing Kusu’s curse…I pray we shall meet again…” she said, and gazed at Kitsu huffing at that misdeed. “Especially you, you need to be well rewarded—” She scooped a pool of water from her hands and it transfigured into many bags of mon. “Just take it as a goddess’ blessing to you…” 

Quietly, Suijin walked into the water, looking at Kirinmaru combing Midoriko’s locks, and Midoriko allowing herself to hold Kirinmaru’s hand tightly.

Kusu? Old friend? You knew that more than I did? 

Indeed your island proves such wonders….

Indeed of different aeons.

“See you soon friends…” Suijin chirped happily. “May happiness follow you...” she added, giving a wink to a displeased Kitsu.

//////////

Suijin somehow skipped her step to see Mahiruma pouting in the distance in his gardens, watching the lilies float by the tranquil pond, mindlessly folding a paper boat from a human’s prayer. “It has been a while, Hiru-kami-sama.”

“You know that I hate that nickname, Suijin…” Mahiruma grumbled to himself, watching that prayer float in the tranquil ponds.  “if you said it during official meetings, I would rather die by now…” He allowed Suijin to pull his cheeks.

“Relax, it is just the two of us…we do not need any formalities. I think humans are amazing—I wish we, the gods, would stop staying at the high pedestal and allow them to inspire us…”

Quickly, Mahiruma crumpled that paper and dissolved it into a tea bush. “Easier said than done. Don’t follow their actions: we hear the prayers, and intercede when needed, unless you are talking about Lady Sunako…I wish I had the power to restrain her, but I am just simply a land god…”

“I know…” Suijin dipped her hand into the pond, dissolving at the sight of Kirinmaru’s eyes widening at the Shiretoko Violet pin that Midoriko found at the market. “Aside from that demon slayer, who is very cute—” Suijin pouted at Kitsu pulling Kirinmaru’s ear over making Midoriko giggly and drunk with sake. “There is a couple that I found out, while saving my friend Kusu…”

“It has been a millennia since I heard a name like Kusu. I suppose you had some help to break his curse…”

Suijin puffed her cheeks at Mahiruma being sharp over the movements of gods and goddesses. “Theirs, Hiru-sama….Kusu is a being that transcends all things—and it is best not to say things that would offend them… Kusu’s curse was bound to them finding their feelings in a paradise artificially created by idiots galore…”

“It could be any man or woman that could be in love, Suijin…” Mahiruma sharply rebuked Suijin. “Why does it matter to you…”

“There is something particular about this man with emerald eyes, looking lovingly over this woman, a priestess—and I am glad he is able to spill his heart to her…”

Mahiruma frowned a little. That description sounds familiar: too often mortals have brown eyes, but that one with green eyes is familiar. 

“I think I met one. I think he prayed for someone…I even forgot what he was like…I know humans in love will curse us gods for tormenting them with such pain…” Mahiruma said mockingly to Suijin, angry that another piece of paper landed on his hand, which he had to fold again, allowing that paper boat to float upon his pond. “I suppose it is their consequence…”

“No…Mahiruma, I believe it brought them purpose to live, even if they do go astray. And, speaking about people going astray…the last beast king Koushirou’s son Kirinmaru—Sunako’s betrothed—did not come back to Kurayami’s palaces. And, as usual, Sunako is grumbling that her gift was not given…”

Mahiruma frowned a little. Huh, I think that green-eyed man’s aura is not human at all. “Wait…what horrid demand did Sunako place on her lover? Is it a bunch of deadly flowers or ballads, wanting a pilgrim to whisk them away to a horrid land…”

Sunako shrugged her shoulders. “I think it was part of their nuptials: that the person was supposed to take an organ of a certain holy priestess…” She watched the scene of Midoriko blushing at Kirinmaru when he read love poetry during their travels. Suijin quickly splashed that visage of the pond to Mahiruma’s perplexed expression. “Wait…did the priestess know that…said green-eyed human…is Kirinmaru…”

“I warned the priestess about a daiyoukai falling in love with her…” Mahiruma nodded firmly to Suijin. “I am recalling her name: was it Midoriko…I heard rumours that Sunako wanted revenge on Midoriko as she lifted a curse from a lover that Sunako spirited away, too…”

Oh no. 

“If Sunako heard about that…” Suijin sighed quietly. “It would not be smooth sailing from that moment on, and the priestess falling in love with Kirinmaru…we must do something!” she exclaimed, tugging on Mahiruma’s sleeve. “Come! We should preserve that love; Kirinmaru deserves that love more than Sunako…”

“We must hold our tongues, Suijin….”

Mahiruma looked over at that blank spot where a dear friend sat once. “I have a bad feeling…” he murmured, watching the leaves in the trees rustle violently to that commotion. He furiously folded half-spoken prayers into measly paper boats.

These little paper boats slowly trailed to an image of a heavy-lidded Midoriko, half-naked with an elaborate furisode to cover her curls, holding Kirinmaru lovingly, feeling his red locks between her fingers, unaware of Mahiruma’s stomach nearly twisting at that scene. Another projection of another being smiled coldly at the fading projection of the lovers, as they snatched Kirinmaru in their hands, unaware that Midoriko was in rapture over that burning love. 

Disgusted by that image, Mahiruma quickly made a dagger out of the human prayers and pushed that image away into moths swirling around Suijin and Mahiruma. He could forget that gaze of Midoriko in his brain.

Something is coming.

“I do not know how or when… but someone is coming to take advantage of their auras, and it is definitely not Sunako…”

A/N: Thank you all for reading the turtle island chapter, I am extremely sorry if I take much longer to do this chapter, than usual- due to personal circumstances- I feel like I am sleuthing it very long- to basically take care of myself mentally before I carry on that long chapter which is a true gestation. 

So the previous two arcs are focused on Kirinmaru finding his voice as a man in an otherwise cruel world, Midoriko- I decided to do a switch-up of Midoriko’s arc which is more how she is allowing herself to discover her body and sexuality, which is pretty challenging how she reacted on her falling in love with Kirinmaru after he held baby Kouta. Like how she would receive it as a character and how it will make her grow? Midoriko is just so fascinating to unravel as a character to show her vulnerability and strength, that yes she could see Kirinmaru as that equal.

Originally it was supposed to be a much more light-hearted story, almost like an Old Hollywood/Disney musical but again, my brain went the other way around, as usual…. I supposed it is much meatier here than just doing light and cute fluff. I was thinking of three myth ideas which I want to borrow for this chapter, and I decided to go very local to my Singaporean roots with Kusu island, which I will place a link for you guys to read, as I love the transfiguration angle which fits the Inuyasha verse well in my personal opinion.

But yeah, we are going to have a much meatier chapter here, if Midoriko’s feelings are validated here, and more on why Mahiruma (Mayonaka) is pretty much sus over Kirinmaru, which I will take some time to build through.

BTW that lovely image I wrote for the ‘paper boat projection’ is based on this gorgeous painting by Gabriel von Max (also fitting as I wrote an Armide AU which is Midokirin, except he is the seducer vs that, which Midoriko sexually awakened is the seducer)

And oh a special shoutout to Eliza for doing the art for this story…because she fits the romantic and whimsy side of it, and I was working on that commission while I am on holiday in Osaka/Kyoto bouncing back and forth between ideas with limited wifi, and timezones. The hardest is to nail Suijin’s look to show that goddess side and make her look oh so cute, and oh Kirinmaru’s soft face was done so well 😩 because we texted that she struggled with expressions and she nailed Kirinmaru’s softness so well.

Chapter Text

Chapter 6.5: When love become an act of defiance. 

“You know that humans cannot be trusted with requests, let alone those who want your powers…” Mahiruma protested to Chayorei—the green-haired woman, as she plucked a tea leaf from his bush to hide her goddess aura.

The green-haired woman gave a small smile as she changed into a masculine appearance, only hinting her true self by those piercing green eyes. “It does not matter, Mahiruma-sama. I feel the Tsubaki tree’s cries…I will judge it fairly even if it causes my death…”

“After all, gods are here to make humanity easier, even if it is just one step…” Chaeyori tipped her hat to Mahiruma. “I think, Mahiruma, you hated being a vessel for them. Perhaps I pray that one day when a human, or just anyone, touches you… you will be able to hold that kindness…”

Mahiruma curled his lip. It will never happen to me, Chaeyorei-sama….it is nothing but a drunken gods’ tale, blabbered by all . He regretted that day that he kept his mouth shut, when Chaeyorei decided to make the wish of a pleading tree come true, though he is now focused on his gardens, staring at the pond to see Kirinmaru and Midoriko holding hands; he wished to splash away that sight. However, that projection kept following them, which transformed into a spoiled princess.

It must be some drunken joke.

No, I must be dreaming.

Quietly, a small sparrow landed in Mahiruma’s garden, transforming into a young man with a gangly physique, having kobicha hair and beady black eyes. He spoke to Mahiruma:

“Mahiruma-sama, it will be a great honour for you to come to Sunako-sama’s wedding…” The young man bowed to him. “For she seeks your company to celebrate such a happy day…”

Mahiruma curled his lip a little. “I would politely say no, for I know eventually she will toy all of the hapless gods to her side….”

“...But…”

“That would be final, I am afraid….” Mahiruma chuckled to the young man, aghast over his reaction. “There is something wrong here…” he added, looking over the pond to hear muffled conversations of the pair—Kirinmaru and Midoriko, in their drunkenness—pour out unspoken feelings, only to push that image away, that Kirinmaru could be a projection of someone whom he wished to bury.

////

A few days after saving Kusu from the island’s curse

Kitsu felt physically sick at Kirinmaru, who was gazing peacefully at Midoriko’s sight, as she lead them towards their next destination. They were off to see another miko friend, Sadiko, to talk about spiritual affairs, and so Kitsu could get some new contracts to earn some money for the upcoming season. However, it felt like one village after another refusing a place for them to stay, despite the fact that Kitsu got favours from a local goddess. And it did not help that Kitsu noticed Kirinmaru fiddling with the pin that Midoriko gave him during their wanderings—admiring its beauty, and even more with Midoriko. “Say Mii-chan, it is odd that those geezers refused my gift—it is from a bloody goddess…”

Midoriko retaliated to Kitsu. “Maybe they do not appreciate beauty at all, unlike our Nishi…” she said, blissfully unaware of Kirinmaru’s racing heart, as he shuffled his feet at her statement that he appreciated beauty in the small things. “I do not know why; I think he has better taste than common folk.” Somehow the sunset cascaded into the night where the moon went bigger than ever, making Kirinmaru glow so prettily in the moonlight as if he was a god on land. 

Midoriko, observing Kirinmaru stretching his back muscles, grinned at Kitsu. “Kitsu…” There was a playfulness in Kirinmaru’s voice. “I am tired every day, we are simply exorcising, finding a nearby inn to sleep and earning little money….” He looked over at Midoriko blushing at him. “Can we just have one day to look at the stars, and realize their infinity….”

Midoriko found her heart thumping over Kirinmaru’s words, subconsciously touching her lips, trying to forget the kiss from the island. “After all, the gods do need some rest…” Kirinmaru smiled at Midoriko, playfully pushing back a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “Especially for a certain hardworking priestess.” Midoriko forced herself to swallow her pride.

“Alright…” Kitsu huffed to herself, grumbling at his romantic statement. “You are right; we cannot see any inn, sp we just will have to camp in the woods for the night. Thankfully, I did not get a bottle from the previous chief….” Both Kirinmaru and Midoriko stared at each other, confused over the mention of a bottle. Midoriko covered her lips in shame, trying to piece out the memories of that one evening when she drunkenly confessed to Kirinmaru that she loved him.

Again, Nishi is not that bright to know its implications of love, Midoriko thought to herself, swallowing her pride, though Kitsu gave a cold gaze to Kirinmaru, warning him about his actions. Quickly, Midoriko found a sheltered area, where she quickly laid her possessions to the side, forcing herself to dig her feet into the dirt as she made a barrier for the trio. “Quickly…for tonight…” 

Kirinmaru observed Midoriko’s flushed expression; she seemed so adorable to hold that embarrassing moment to her heart. 

“Then don’t I sit with….” Kitsu quickly placed the blade onto her neck. “And yes…I will be watching both of you tonight…”

“No…” Midoriko quickly set up fresh clothes for them. “Nishi has the honour of…” She quickly ran over to the corner. “I will be going to find a spring to bathe…Nishi…please do not do anything stupid…”

Kitsu felt her body grow heavier than ever from exhaustion. “If you say so…Mii-chan, I do not trust you after you drink so heavily, your body leaning towards his…is it true, Nishi?”

Kirinmaru shook his head, impulsively fidgeting the pin back and forth. “I do not know, but I would never do anything harmful to her.” 

Kitsu nodded at Kirinmaru. “If you say so, maybe…you…are right…I…” she stammered; before long her body gave way to heavy sleep. “...Just help me to find…her….I am so damn cold…”

Kirinmaru nodded to Kitsu, quickly pacing himself to the forest. Midoriko’s smell of pine and ash should have been easy; before long, Kirinmaru ran through the forests, forgoing the stars that shone on him, but instead saw vignettes of his inner child screaming for his mother. “Mother! Mother! Mother…” Kirinmaru smiled at that sad expression of that child: his red hair covering the tears in his eyes, kneeling upon the ground, his tears becoming the growing flowers in the forest.

Wait, there is no field?

Kirinmaru saw a young girl sitting comfortably with another older man. Her clothes indicated a princess’ wares. “You seem lost…” she said as quietly she passed him a small plate of grilled eggplants and rice.

“I am not, we are resting before we go to the next town to get some supplies…” Kirinmaru quickly grabbed the meal, and continuously chomped on it. “If I could get away without Kitsu breathing down our necks, I wish to give Midoriko some time to see that my words with Kusu are true even if…” 

“Even if I defy some orders…”

The princess smiled quietly. “Oh how sweet, can you tell me who is that ‘her’, that Midoriko…” She allowed the older man to sit by his side, giving him a small cup of warm tea. Soon he found he was hallucinating to the sight of Midoriko seductively peeling off her robes to reveal her bare collarbones and the curve of her small breasts. “That…” Kirinmaru shouted to that void,  “Midoriko…gods…I am…” He found himself weeping at that sight of Midoriko, desiring to kiss her endlessly. “I am…in love with you…and even if lifetimes we are separated, I want to meet you again and again…” Impulsively he began to embrace that hallucination so tightly that he breathed her sweet aroma of pine and soil. “Please haunt me until we are bound for eternity.” Soon, it crumbled into a small paper shikigami which Kirinmaru found himself sighing at the sight with the older man sitting comfortably at his side. 

“Interesting, your mind formed projections that ‘Midoriko’ is your ghost, that she will cling to you…” Quietly he lit a candle for the trio. “Am I right, Chiyeko-hime-sama…”

Chiyeko smiled at him “You are right, Takumi-sama…” she said, holding Kirinmaru’s cold hand. “In fact, such a beautiful thing—rumours of Koushirou’s lost son on human lands letting his emotions come over him. I wonder what if that ‘Midoriko’ is more than what he thinks…” He felt someone blowing out the candle to leave them in the void. 

“What do you know about her…Kirinmaru, the lost son of Koushirou…”

Kirinmaru found himself blubbering over the pair. “...I…know…she will find me…her…” He could only see that memory of Midoriko dancing upon that field of the youkai lands, without any care of the world. 

A hushed voice echoed in his ears.

‘The beating heart of Midoriko.’

Sunako?

No, that cannot be.

Takumi smile a little. “Take this….”, Kirinmaru took another sip of the tea, feeling the vegetal taste in his tongue, That pink cup cracked on the ground, cutting his hand, which cause a stream of blood to bathe the ground. In Kirinmaru’s blurry vision-the golden cracks of the cup become vivid rivers in his brain. The birds began to sing loudly that it become almost painful in his ears and he could feel in his feet the dirt of the ground. 

“Hmmm….”

Kirinmaru heard that said voice in his brain, “Anki…to the void he must go…his eyes must be his lover’s…let it be ballads and tales for us to follow…”  forcing himself to search for the Chieyoko and Takumi, but instead it is the leaves that dance along the breeze. “For each storyteller will leave little details, to benefit’s one self….” 

Kirinmaru felt his knees digging to the ground on the dirt, his heart ache on the vacant eye of the sparrow, only hearing another voice of another child. “I feel sad….I wish I could hear that little birdie sing….” Smoke slowly blew into his eyes, where Kirinmaru simply wandered around the silhouettes of hands reviving a dead sparrow.

“Midoriko, what did you do to that bird…” A gentle masculine voice echoed in his ears.

“I simply resurrected it…”

The carrier of that said gentle masculine voice—Takumi—smiled at Midoriko. “Can you explain why…”

“I just…”

Kirinmaru found himself touching his lips, as if fearful that instinct overcame him, to see a riot of colour burning into his vision.

////

Midoriko found herself relieved to bathe at the nearby spring. She saw Kitsu falling asleep and gave a small smile to her. Kitsu-chan, you overwork yourself, huh? Midoriko felt a prick in her reiki. This is strange. 

There is a god.

But its energy feels…

Feels…

Before long, Midoriko felt a force pulling her elsewhere, to only see a bright garden filled with many flowers; some of the plants that did not belong to that land. A little princess—Chiyeko—stood by her side. “We are playing a little game, priestess….”

What game? What game?

“Midoriko, just rest—nothing will come to you…” Chiyeko mockingly chided Midoriko. “You see, what happened in the past or the present, I do not know…” 

Midoriko grumbled quietly, trying to rub away that vision in her eyes, only to see a green-eyed lady sitting comfortably at the edge of her garden. “My son….” The embrace felt so sweet to Midoriko. “Do you take the ones with the pink petals…”

Both Kirinmaru’s and Midoriko’s voices overlap one another. “Yes mother, what do you know about them…” 

The green haired lady smiled at Kirinmaru “...I…I…”

This is got to be a joke, Midoriko thought as she tried her hardest to search for Hashi, only to see shimmering flowers following her. “You just have to stay strong for your lover, because one tear, and his soul is mine…”

Who?

Midoriko pondered quietly to see the vision of another man, with his mouth bloodied, holding her hand. “Hello my son, sorry if I am slow…..” 

My son? 

Who is that son?

Wait am I? Nishi?

Koushirou quietly gripped his shoulders, giving him a playful wink to the carrier of his voice. “My son, have you been behaving well…” 

Midoriko replied to him similarly, as she spoke the same words as that stranger.  “I do, Father. Mother has grown sicker and sicker than ever…” Midoirko forced herself to pinch the fat in her arm to calm her nerves, observing the riot of colour in the gardens.

No wonder why he spoke about these gardens with tenderness. Midoriko’s heart soon ached at that very thought; however, she took deep breaths and walked around, only to hear another voice.

“Kirinmaru, we lost power due to our father, whose fangs are blunt…now you shall be my blade…” Her eyes trailed to the corpse of a dead woman, whose gaze burned him. “And thou, a wielder to your destiny…”

That voice…that..that feels….

Antagonistic. Domineering.

Midoriko chewed her lip. I must not cry, otherwise I am gone and so is…

Nishi.

Nishi.

Nishi.

Nishi.

///

Mahiruma found himself heaving a sigh of relief as he watched the world settled in strange bibs and bobs, glancing at a mortal panting furiously, shouting out loudly to her. “MII-CHAN! NISHI! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU???

That mortal, is it Midoriko’s companion Kitsu?

Kitsu grumbled to herself, “Shit…Mii-chan and Nishi have been gone for a long time…” She cut down every branch and bush, only to find no souls. It was nothing but her, a girl fearful of that consuming world, and yet she bit it with gritted teeth.

This does not feel right, Mahiruma thought to himself. This feels strange.

///

Kirinmaru found his heart aching as he felt the stickiness of the blood on his feet from massacred villagers, and the eyes upon that creature who cackled loudly.

“Priestess, come and fight me…”

Kirinmaru and Midoriko’s breaths paced quietly, as Midoriko pulled an arrow to that horrid figure. “I will….” she said, and with her reiki building up, that arrow raced to that target, indifferent to the screams of that creature. Slowly, it morphed to a fragile human looking at Midoriko. “Lady priestess, would you forgive a sinner like me…”

Kirinmaru found himself speaking the same words as Midoriko. “Of course I will;, we all fall short in one way or another…” She placed her hand unto his bleeding chest, allowing that perpetrator to take his time to breathe. “I forgive…you…” she said, observing the beating of the heart slowing down and his fingers growing cold.

A clap sound echoed in his ears, and quickly he found himself lying down in a small hut, with the metallic odour of blood and rotting flesh perfuming the air. Kirinmaru found himself vomiting at that sight, similar to Midoriko curling up at the corner with the tattered clothes of the villagers to keep her warm for the rain that washed away the blood split over that village. Did she see hardships that she kept mum about… Kirinmaru found himself shedding a tear for that sight, when the princess’ voice came in. 

“You wept? Why?” Chiyeko asked, pulling him out of that horrible situation.

“She has seen blood and did not flinch; how can she do that…”

Chiyeko laughed at Kirinmaru as she brought him to the void. “What you see is hell, pretty one…humans can be deceitful, perhaps even more frightening than the monsters they conjure in their minds…”

////

Exhausted, Kitsu laid down by a tree, only to see Chiyeko sipping tea where the two paintings quickly moved back and forth, and Takumi playing the flute gently. “You must be tired…” Chiyeko said.

Kitsu gave a scowl. “Yeah…I am looking for two people…a priestess and a man with green eyes, similar to your paintings…” Her eyes widened with horror at the realisation of the scenes that Midoriko encountered in her girlhood. 

“WAIT…THESE ARE THE TWO…WHERE THE HELL…I….”

Chiyeko tossed one of her shikigamis to lay the demon slayer down, and Takumi continuously played the flute to make the nightmares grow even more intense than ever.

////

Midoriko quietly walked over to the forest to see spectral animals dancing quietly, and a female voice echoed in her ears. “Ignore these animals, Kirinmaru…” The horse’s neigh seemed to fluctuate the female’s sly commands. “They are but little pawns for my father to hold…” She felt sorry for the animals that wandered around the forest, blanking out the words that the female companion spoke about suffering and godhood. “...My brother came up with a proposition: that a beating heart would be sufficient, but not just anyone per se…”

“A priestess by the name of Midoriko….”

Me? That cannot be?? Midoriko grew confused over that statement. What did I do to wrong that person?

Midoriko found herself speaking those same words, feeling the roughness of the dead bark on her skin. “That priestess, she did nothing wrong, and I should not meddle with affairs like that…” 

What does Kirinmaru think about me? You should say no! You should say no… However she spoke the same words as him.

“Fine, I will accept that offer…” That female grinned at Midoriko happily.   “I will take the heart of the priestess…So you will be pleased…”

Both Midoriko and Kirinmaru’s words echoed similarly, unaware that the air grew damper at every word. “My…wife…” 

I have a wife? No? It cannot be? I…

“That settles the matter, Ki-Ki…We should tell my brother the happy news…”

 And strangely that statement echoed in Midoriko’s head. Yes, such happy news…

There was no happy news, and Midoriko found herself doubting these words. I have a wife? And I'm supposed to murder a priestess, which is I? What? That cannot be Nishi? 

No?

No.

No!

“Your so-called lover is not innocent as he seems…” Chieyko grinned at Midoriko, seeing a small tear trickling down her face. “Now you are….” 

Midoriko heard the screams of Kitsu: “GODDAMNIT MII-CHAN GODDAMNIT MII-CHAN GODDAMNIT WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU???”

Give in. Give in. Give in.

“There is a side of which no one will speak, priestess: he is nothing but an animal….he shall be mine as my pet, and you, are simply a poor visage of what…”

Midoriko closed her eyes to yell at Kitsu. “Can you help to break me out, Kitsu-chan…” She wiped away the tears in her eyes. “Tell me something! Tell me! Tell….”

Kitsu shouted loudly back to her. “Hang in there! I think of what we’ve tackled, Mii-chan, stay strong! The princess wanted you trapped and I…I…I…” Kitsu tried to pull her fans out to slay the companion, shouting the words: “COME YOU DRUNKEN GODS OF SLAUGHTER! COME AND GET US! COME AND GET US MOTHERF**KER”, as she tried to rip off the painting from Chiyeko’s hands, only to be pounded by her companion, Takumi.

“Anki, deal with this bitch…”

////

Come and get us. Come and get us motherf**ker!

Mahiruma’s heart stung at the cry of an angry human. Oh no. Mahiruma took some deep breaths to observe beyond the pond, the humans dealing with a fallen god. 

No.

Quickly Mahiruma took some steps to the pond to slowly dive into the cold water, feeling a rush of energy in his veins. 

I wonder why?

Kitsu found herself staring at a young man walking into the dark forest. “Ye fallen gods….” His voice seemed so calm. “Ye fallen gods, why prey on these humans…”

Kitsu found herself drifting off to a deep slumber, unaware of Mahiruma penetrating that barrier by which he plucked the leaf from the nearby tree, pulling that heavy object from Kitsu’s chest. “Why have the pleasure to take what is not yours…those who masqueraded as royalty…” Mahiruma quickly pressed his fingers onto Chiyeko’s forehead. “I shall take away that power from you, and that game you played with mortals is nothing but a dream…” and he took away the paintings from her hands.

Mahiruma made himself jump to the painting, and walked to the burning gardens in Kirinmaru’s mind to see Midoriko curling into a ball. “No wonder, he saw me as something but I am…I am…”

“Priestess, snap out of it, see it as nothing but strange projections…” Mahiruma reassured Midoriko. “Come, where you lived is crumbling and you shall no longer be a spectre of yourself…” He forming a small light for Midoriko to follow. “I know you can do it…”

Midoriko felt a rush of energy coursing her veins: a woman’s laugh, a father’s yelling, a sister’s manipulation, a suitor’s hard wish, the cold gaze of the Nue which they fought and now…

Now…

Reality coursed through Midoriko’s veins, only to see Kitsu arguing with Kirinmaru about what happened, Kirinmaru barely looking at her beauty, feeling a knot in his stomach.

“Nishi…I am sorry…if I am not that…” Kirinmaru did not reply to her words, causing a sting in her heart, Kitsu punching at the trees until her knuckles bled, yelling at the sky. “COME AND GET ME DRUNKEN GODS, YOU WILL BE SORRY, YOU WILL BE SORRY…”

“Kitsu-chan…I…I...I…” 

Kitsu mumbled under her breath. “I cannot…I cannot save you…I…I…” Midoriko nearly wanted to mumble sorry under her breath, but she slowly felt the hiccup in her throat. 

Mahiruma quietly transfigured himself from the leaves, settling himself comfortably at the corner of the woods to allow Midoriko to be still at his presence. “Priestess…I would say in the first place you are foolish; you should know your fair share of fallen gods…”

Midoriko raised an eyebrow. “Perhaps…it is the gap of my knowledge…maybe I am clouded by my love for Nishi…though I doubt…if his memories are…”

Real.

Midoriko found herself pulling her hair and weeping profusely, feeling the burn of the tears streaming down her face. “He seems bothered with me, as I…” Midoriko forced herself to swallow the tears that coursed down her face. 

Mahiruma sat quietly, forming a small cup of tea, offering it to her. “I know, Lady Midoriko, and I know you are a good person. It is sometimes for the best to give up; if you ever continue that path, it will lead you to excruciating pain, and Nishi may not treat you as you wanted after seeing your truth…” 

“Take this…I will do what I can within my power so that ‘Nishi’ will never remember you forever…”

Midoriko sniffed at the tea, feeling its effects of forgetfulness. “You, a god, wanting to dictate my fate? How sad…”  she quietly placed the tea on Mahiruma’s lap. “You do not allow me to love?”

“I wish you no harm, and if you pursue it, I…” However, Mahiruma noticed Midoriko’s hand squeezing tightly upon him. 

“Then I must confess to you, Mahiruma-o-kami-sama! I love Nishi-san, and loving someone, Mahiruma-kami, is holding onto those precious memories, no matter how sad or painful they are…”

Mahiruma raised an eyebrow to see a change in Midoriko’s eyes, soft and gentle—almost like a giggling celestial maiden in her baths. “And if I offer a prayer, may you help me to tread that path, no matter how troubling it is…” Suddenly, Midoriko started to cover her mouth in shock.

Shit.

I made a fool out of myself.

“Very well…” Mahiruma gave a wistful smile to see Kirinmaru searching for Midoriko. “I shall not leave him for long…” He left her hurriedly to watch the scene play out by sitting on the branches to see Kirinmaru give a bashful smile to Midoriko. 

“I never see you pout so hard…” he said, seeing Midoriko in disarray over that strange confession. “I thought I heard something…”

Nishi is lying, Midoriko thought to herself. I only told my truth to Mahiruma-sama, not to him, how does he know?

Midoriko shook her head. “No it is not…why are you interested in me, Nishi? I am nothing, I am the void in the stars, I am ordinary…I am just…”

“You said it, Midoriko.” Kirinmaru gave a grin, forcing himself to tighten his grip on her shoulders even more, allowing himself to repress his youki to consume her like a king’s feast. For that mere moment Kirinmaru felt her heartbeat slowly beating to her thoughts. “Never doubt yourself, as I doubt you, because Midoriko…your heart is strong and your hands bring such precious life from death…” She could feel the exhaustion in his voice, as if fighting off her sad memories.

Midoriko could hear Kirinmaru whispering into her ear, Let it be you. Midoriko found herself tearing up on the inside that she had to steady her breaths, feeling his nails digging into her chest, feeling her heartbeat. “And what if it is not me…” 

“It will always be you…” Kirinmaru pleaded to her, allowing Midoriko to push his arms away. “Please haunt me until we are bound for eternity, …” 

“That…that is too impulsive…Nishi…” Midoriko barked a little, searching for Mahiruma for reassurance. “Will you ever lie to me, Nishi, about these memories of you, I saw your mother, your father, your…at that moment, I felt that I am not sure. Should I believe in you or not?” 

“Maybe yes, maybe no, unless what you see is your belief…” Kirinmaru laughed mockingly to himself. “Sorry…I have many thoughts about you. It is a pity—you would have been my match if fate allowed…”

Midoriko found herself yawning from long hours of walking; the ‘game’ surely drained her ‘reiki’. “You know what…I am tired…” She looked over at the sky; it was too dark. “And I want to give Kitsu-chan some space…should we find somewhere else to rest…” Midoriko took one of her shikigamis from her sleeves and wrote her name with her reiki.

“We will discuss where to go next…” Midoriko forced herself to speak cheerfully to Kirinmaru ‘When morning light…” Midoriko felt a prick in her chest.

Hold on.

Something is amiss…

“Is everything alright…Midoriko…” Kirinmaru frowned when she pushed him away, holding his callused hand for a brief moment. She was no longer the cold priestess, but a girl. A girl who was fearful of the world and yet birthed it.

“I do not know…” Midoriko swallowed her doubts to pinpoint the energy at that pit-stop. “Can you stay here a little, Nishi? I am going to find the source of the energy…” 

A/N: So hello there! I hope you are well! , originally, after Turtle island it was supposed to go straight to a key smut scene (It will be coming soon, do not worry dear reader), but serial gave me the idea that we deepen the emotional and sexual connection between Midoriko and Kirinmaru, like they are in the place of comfortableness. Of course, I was unsure how to do it, but lately, I have been binging Nurarihyon no Mago again, especially the manga which I am inspired by one of the youkai’s-Kidomaru’s attacks and it really compelled the action here, to show its brevity.

And Mayonaka, (yes Mahiruma in the story for clarity), is such a great character to write to propel Midoriko’s sexuality- I always loved doing him in God with Many Names, but to form him as a reluctant mentor character made my heart sing, especially when he is formed out of his scepticism, to some extent he actually grows to be open to others and love can lead to possibilities. I am always a romantic as always, so this makes me so happy.

So the next chapter, is going to be a big one, and I am very excited about what is happening next if that said event has fanned the flames for Kirinamru and Midoriko.

Chapter Text

Chapter 7: In order to get to the heart, I think sometimes you'll have to cut through.

“Should I tell Kitsu that you are going to find whatever that source of ‘energy’ is around here?”

Midoriko smiled a little. “Perhaps; we should not leave Kitsu-chan in the dark. I think she feels upset that she cannot save me…”

“I will wait for you at the pit-stop, and yes, I would be wary of unwilling fallen gods, Nishi…”

There was a melancholy in Midoriko’s voice that burned his mind like the flames of hell, which forced him to dig his fingers into the thorny bushes, allowing the thorns to make his hands bleed a little—only to alleviate the pain.

Perhaps, it would be the right time to let him speak his true feelings to her. He had been denying himself for long, and if a cruel game spoke to his heart—that Midoriko needed to stop relying on herself and Kitsu, and open her heart to him. 

Kirinmaru quickly ran back to the campsite, forcing himself to fiddle his fingers back and forth to calm his nerves, glancing at Kitsu, who was cleaning her weapon with a dirty rag. “Look…I cannot handle you two squabbling birds…” she said, watching the embers of the fire dying on that cool night. Kitsu rolled her eyes at Kirinmaru’s bewildered expression as he stared at the embers flickering back and forth.

“Nishi…look…I am not going to bite you…” Kitsu budged Kirinmaru out of his daydreaming as she threw the rag into his face. “I can see that you want to say something to me…”

“Uhmm…whatever grievances I did to your friend, it is my fault. Perhaps I lived in my own head…”

Kitsu chuckled ruefully. “I know…I know Mii-chan will hunger to help others, instead of bearing children. . That is a choice that she made herself…but still…” Kirinmaru watched Kitsu hold back her tears. “I feel uncomfortable that a woman like Mii-Chan, the most powerful priestess in all of the lands, must tread alone…you know that; you see what men do to us…”

Kirinmaru quietly listened to Kitsu’s rants on her inability to save Midoriko, allowing the tears to spill upon the ground, the bruised knuckles on her hands signalling her anger at not being able to save her, but instead a strange god intervening in their lives. 

I know.

Quietly, Kirinmaru wrote the kanji for the word ‘peace’ and placed it on the ground, allowing Kitsu to breathe a little from the sobs. “You are tired, Kitsu, get some rest—we will not be far…” He said, slowly seeing Kitsu slump alongside the dying embers, and hearing her mumble these crude words to Kirinmaru:

“Go and run along, friend. I will never abandon you unlike that idiot dude I loved—was it Ichi?…”

Kirinmaru withheld a chuckle from his lips. Beneath her crude words, Kitsu had an undying devotion to Midoriko, and that step to gain her trust, though slow, would benefit him. Kirinmaru bowed to her. “Yes, I will be back, I promise…”

On his way to meet Midoriko at the familiar pit-stop, Kirinmaru chewed his lip, staring at the huge moon that shone on him. 

Shit… Kirinmaru felt that scream in that ear calling him to claw Midoriko’s heart out. He forced himself to repel that ugly thought by digging his nails into his hakama. How can I be so stupid , he thought, shutting his eyes to repress that sweet aroma of pine and ash that was Midoriko. Shit, she is fertile now.

If any man touched her, Kirinmaru would weep on the ground that they would steal her beauty, then tell him to consume it immediately.  

Damn it, do not think about that.

Do not think about that.

“Hello….”

That sweet voice stiled Kirinmaru’s heart. “What took you so long…” Kirinmaru glanced at Midoriko standing over the shadowy flower fields, with the moon shining over luscious black hair. He quietly gripped her shoulders with his gentle hands. Midoriko’s eyes widened with shock over that grand action.

“I…I thought…Nishi…I…”

“Sorry. I should have not done that. We should give Kitsu some space, I have never seen her so worried for you…” Kirinmaru shrugged his shoulders. “Did you manage to find the source of the prickling…”

Midoriko reluctantly held Kirinmaru’s hand, finding her reiki deescalating from the shock. “Sort of… Just do not do anything stupid, Nishi…” Kirinmaru forced himself to stay silent, withholding himself from breathing into her sweet aroma, watching Midoriko scan over the small corner of the forest to find a dishevelled hut, the roof in disrepair and the smell of wet earth coming over that place. Kirinmaru found his stomach churning over that sight. It seems hostile…and evil…

Like Sunako herself.

“I think this is where I felt a sharp pain in my chest…” Midoriko said, quietly pushing the rattan door out of their sight, to see cobwebs littering shelves and pots. Kirinmaru followed suit to Midoriko’s uneasy steps, examining the life around this hut.

“Sheesh, how long has it been since it has been cleaned?” 

“Hmmmm, maybe like 50 years? Or so, maybe longer. I do not know…” Midoriko simpered a little. “An abandoned hut…in these woods with that energy, why...I…” Midoriko swung her hands back and forth to check for any signs of life.

Why did I feel it…

“Nishi, stay at the edge of the hut, I will see…”

Before Midoriko could make any conclusion on the cause of such decay, she glanced at a skeletal couple embraced to death, clutching whatever clothes remained on them.

“Nishi…Please come…I…”

By the spirits. Midoriko clapped her hands and said a prayer to allow the passage of those souls.  Kirinmaru sheepishly followed suit to clap his hands in prayer for that couple. Midoriko frowned at the sight: maybe that is what my reiki is screaming, too.

I wonder how long this couple has been dead? Kirinmaru thought to himself as Midoriko tried to clear the cobwebs from the bodies. Sad…I wonder if they lived a good life, whether separate or together.

“Nishi… can you help me bury them…” Midoriko quietly whispered in his ear. “At least if there is a chance, let them have a grave remembered by us both.” Trying to separate the couple from the tight embrace, though, resulted in the clanking of bones; when Kirinmaru felt the remaining hair on the female’s body, Midoriko said, “Stop staring Nishi…I want the dead to rest…”

“Do you have any ideas?” Kirinmaru blurted out to Midoriko, placing the female skeleton in the corner, hesitantly searching for digging tools to make a grave. From the window, Kirinmaru saw a parade of youkai following around with the lantern-bearer holding a lamp, before it was snuffed out.

Midoriko grimaced at the body of the man. “I think there is a patch of forest near to their hut. I suppose they used to walk around here…maybe that would be nice…” They quietly made their procession to the patch of forest, with no words spoken for the dead couple, expect silent glances at the fireflies dancing around them.

“Place the bodies here Nishi…” Kirinmaru set the couple down, thinking of the many scenarios of that couple’s life, if their children forgot about them or if they had effervescent moments of joy. “We’ll start digging a grave in a bit.” Little did they know that a pair of fireflies flew above the skeletons of the dead couple. “It will be tiresome, so we will take shifts on that, understood…”

“Yesm understood…”

////

Kirinmaru paused monetarily as he watched Midoriko sprinkle the last specks of dirt onto their makeshift grave. “Midoriko…your powers, they can bring the dead to life, but why not this couple…” he asked, allowing Midoriko to catch her breath after this exhausting act.

Midoriko wished that she could not reply to him; however, she felt the urge to touch his chest, to feel his soft heartbeat. “Sometimes we think we are gods when we breathe, but even we are touched by death. It will depend on how we fear it or embrace it…”

“I assume they embraced it beautifully.”

Midoriko rolled her eyes as she raised her arms to sniff around her armpits. “Being a romantic is hard at times when you embrace death…” She indeed smelled like a grave-digger, with the dirt clinging upon her robes. “Come, Nishi, we should wash up and find shelter, besides…it will get cold now…”

For that moment, Kirinmaru stared at that strange makeshift grave. How do they embrace it so beautifully? 

“I hope we can find a spring where we can bathe separately…”

“Agreed.” Kirinmaru smiled sadly, as he allowed himself to linger upon that moment to see the two stray fireflies lingering at that grave. “Can you…give…me a moment…” Midoriko smiled a little, watching him write a word upon the freshly buried soil.

However, she did not catch the word that Kirinmaru wrote.

“Sure…”

If aptly, Midoriko found a small spring at the corner of the forest, where she stripped herself bare, and allowed her hair to cover her nude form. She looked around the area, in hopes that no stray bandit would find her naked. What is with him, and his damn words? He seems not to belong in this world.

But he seems to burn me.

Finally, she let her guard down, thinking about her passionate words to Mahiruma. I must confess to you, Mahiruma-o-kami-sama! I love Nishi-san, and loving someone, Mahiruma-kami, is holding onto those precious memories, no matter how sad or painful they are…

Nishi seemed composed at the burial. Maybe he saw his mother being buried, and he did not have the final words before the earth swallowed her.

No. Maybe what I see is a dream. A dream. Yes. Maybe it is not. I will say my truth to him, and he will...

He will.

//////

Meanwhile, Kirinmaru looked at the moon; he wondered if it worried as much as he, and he forced himself to search for a nearby river to clean himself of the sweat he accumulated from burying the couple. 

That form, one of mortal flesh, made Kirinmaru so vulnerable and yet so frightened as the shock of the cold water awakened him. 

Kirinmaru thought of Arata’s mocking a fortnight ago in their palace. “A spouse befitting of my sister is weak-willed…pity…” His hand caving to his chin, playing with his locks. “Remember the heart of the priestess Midoriko—bloodied and beating—and I will taunt you no more…” However, another voice came to mind, and it was that irritating god Mahiruma. 

A hapless fool praying for a priestess. Well, I might be damned. 

However, Kirinmaru’s thoughts were snapped away by the shiver down his spine from the cold water. Perhaps soaking in the water would show his weaknesses. Reluctantly, Kirinmaru rose up from the waters; he glanced at the other side, only to see Midoriko walking along the bushes, with her hadajuban showing the silhouette of her body as she held her dirty robes.

His face reddened when he saw her curves illuminated by the fireflies.

Oh shit.

She will kill me for that. 

Quickly, Kirinmaru ran from the river and quickly changed into his clothes, only to scoot by the hut and see it empty. There, he allowed himself to compose his thoughts. Thankfully she is not drunk and wanting to strip down to show her…

Kirinmaru sank his teeth into his bottom lip as he hesitantly wrote the kanji word 'Barrier’ on his palm, pressing it on the ground of the hut, to protect them from the elements, human or youkai. 

After all, one must not be unprepared in all situations hereafter.

////

“You seem to know some tricks to stop youkai…” Midoriko chirped a little, her eyes staring lucidly at the stars, pushing that makeshift barrier away in the hut. “No ordinary human would have such knowledge here…” She seemed rather serene at sight, with hair loose and lips sullied after the exhausting burial. 

“Stop staring at me and make yourself useful…grab some twigs on that path; there is a patch of forest where you can find dried wood….”

Midoriko’s grimacing expression makes Kirinmaru nearly bolt to his feet, “Yes…right…firewood…” He quickly grabbed an empty pot, dropping it hesitantly down on the ground, before scooting himself to the patch of forest. Kirinmaru found himself irritated by the hum of cicadas cackling in the air and the crunching of sticks on the ground. 

Damn, what is with her? 

Was she as upset over that burial as I am…

But she looks so lonely for someone so beautiful. Like unapproachable….

What if she found out the extent of my powers?

However, Kirinmaru shut his eyes and gathered as many twigs in his hands as he could. No, she would love me as I am. His doubts seemed to melt away with Midoriko clanking the stones back and forth, sparks flying up and down like fireworks at the summer festival, with a pile of thick wood at the side. “The twigs…to start the fire…” 

Oh…

Sheepishly, Kirinmaru threw the twigs haphazardly at the small pit, and Midoriko made the final spark to allow the fire to spread slightly in the small pit. “You seem to know this stuff…” Kirinmaru was in awe of the flame spreading so quickly from the twigs to the flame. “Like it is brave…you can be eaten by horrid youkai and all…”

Midoriko shrugged her shoulders. “That is what I do as a travelling priestess: camp against the elements, though I have to thank Kitsu for teaching me these skills—one of which is building a fire out of nowhere. While you are scrambling for twigs, I found out that our recently buried couple left some wood at the side. Thankfully, it’s not damp.” Quickly, she tossed a few leaves into the pot of boiling water. “Some old tea leaves, leftover rice from another, also thankfully not swallowed by weevils and pickles…” Quietly, she passed him a pair of chopsticks and a bowl for him to hold. “This meal may not be as luxurious as Turtle island’s inn food, but it will suffice for the evening, until…”

Midoriko sheepishly opened the pot of pickles, passing it to Nishi, which he consumed happily to fill his stomach. “If not for Kitsu, a woman of my age would have been trapped into a hapless marriage, Nishi, in these circumstances it is better that I survive alone…” 

Kirinmaru stretched his feet upwards, allowing the flames to warm his cold feet. “Midoriko…you do not need to, your heart needs to be shared…” he said, gripping one of her wrists, and pressing it onto his lips to feel her pulse points swelling back and forth. “Treading alone can be exhausting…”

Midoriko forced herself to roll her eyes, hearing the nagging conversation of that irritating god Mahiruma in her ear, whispering to her. 

That demon…

He wants to eat your heart…and fill your belly with its child….

What consequences are you willing to partake?

“You sound like that demon, the god from the village two months back, tried to warn me about you…” Midoriko barked at Kirinmaru. “It makes me…it makes me…” Kirinmaru felt his youki swelling from the pressure to consume her, but took deep breaths . That cannot be it, Mahiruma must be telling lies to her…after all, she is interested in living a life alone.

But not him.

Kirinmaru spoke plainly to her. “We can agree that gods cannot be trusted…” 

Midoriko raised her eyebrow at his frankness. “Then who do you trust?” 

Kirinmaru smiled boyishly at Midoriko, tossing the dried leaves into a pot of water, allowing its herbal aroma to perfume the empty hut. 

“You…” Kirinmaru confessed to Midoriko, unaware of the bubbles of water pooled up and down in the pot. “And only you, I am willing to be consumed…”

Midoriko found her hands sweating and her heart racing up and down over his poetic words. No, it cannot be. It cannot be. I am held by the vow of chastity, no matter what. No man will ever hold me, like ever… Kirinmaru noticed her nipples stiffening amidst the cool wind underneath her hadajuban . “You are no ordinary human, Nishi. You are a deceiver, spinning romantic tales about your childhood, your future wife…it hurts…it hurts...it hurts…”

“To do what…” Kirinmaru’s eyebrows furrowed slightly. “I did not mean to mock you with my tales…” His heart sank at seeing Midoriko’s eyes streaming with tears.

“You did! Idiot! I….I…fear you Nishi…and yet…I love you despite it all…” 

Kirinmaru emphatically gazed at Midoriko, combing through the strands of her long hair, soothing her anger by kissing her lips. “What I see, Midoriko, in your memories—past or present—I wish, oh gods, oh gods.” Midoriko grew still over his words. “I shall make you an ordinary human, no obligations on my end but to simply love you…” His hands traced to the seams of her hadajuban, removing it to reveal her naked chest. “Fear not…Midoriko…” 

Kirinmaru forced himself to kiss the nape of her neck, tracing his mouth unto her bare collarbone. “I promise…I…” His fingers traced over the curve of her breasts, breathing onto her sweet aroma. 

The sound of her heartbeat grew wild.

Kirinmaru’s mind was riddled with that mocking voice of Arata, as forced himself to focus on Midoriko’s sad eyes, rapidly pinching her nipples, his hands squeezing her mounds, causing her to moan into his ear. 

Come, coward. That heart is surely yours to feed my sister. Come. I dare you.

I dare you.

Tear that woman’s heart out.

However, Kirinmaru’s blunt fingernails transformed into a claw, as he clawed his hand upon the supple flesh. However, he did not notice that he nearly tore Midoriko’s flesh, as his mind focused on her pleasure, interrupted by a loud yelp of pain. He found his hand bloodied from tha sight and quickly rubbed it on his hakama. Midoriko quickly placed her palms on her breasts to focus on healing the wound between her chest. “You seem…”

The mocking voice of Arata echoed in Kirinmaru’s ears. 

What a fool. 

No wonder you are easy to play with. 

My sister will love you of course….

if you are man enough.

“... I am sorry…I do not know what overcame me…” Kirinmaru muttered shamefully to Midoriko. “To tell you the truth, I have never laid with any woman in my life…I would be...gods…” He turned his head away from her. “If you do not want to lay with me, I would be glad to die blissfully alone…human or not, only to be quenched by your beauty.”

“...No…” Midoriko smiled sheepishly. “Humans do impulsive things, and I believe this act is out of instinct…but I feel it in your energy that you will not hurt me…” Calmly, she took off his bloodied clothes and allowed his hand to cup her breast, her hands digging into his bare shoulder. 

Midoriko soothed his anxiety by giving him soft kisses, leaving a trail of spit between them. “After all, the fire is slowly dying down and I could go cold…” That statement caused him to snap out of his miasma and continuously kiss her passionately, focusing on her pleasure by pinching and pulling her nipple and caressing the softness of her breast. 

“Oh. I will accept your offer…” Quickly, Kirinmaru took off the rest of her clothes to reveal her nubile body. “If you let me…” he added, and his eyes trailed over her slender stomach, her supple hips, and that wild garden of curls.

Midoriko whispered a secret, allowing Kirinmaru’s fingers to caress her garden of curls, feeling its roughness. “I have a confession I must make, Nishi…”

“I questioned myself what I did during our time with Kusu, that…that…never mind…” Kirinmaru rolled his upper lip a little. She seems to tremble in fear of being naked for me. “I heard Kitsu-chan saying this before…because she, well, she does this with her hands when she is frustrated…” A blush came over her pale complexion, taking his callused hand to the top part of her fleshy nether lips. “It is underneath the fleshy parts you are holding…I may have accidentally fondled that part, thinking of you. I am not sure, but apparently…it…well…”

Kirinmaru shivered at the cold breeze, gently parting the garden of curls to see a small nub between her slit, which he pressed his thumb onto the nub, causing a squeak to come out of her mouth. 

That thing.

That thing between her legs must be pleasurable to her. 

Calmly, Kirinmaru kissed that nub before proceeding to stroke it up and down. He quietly licked his lips—figuring out the taste of Midoriko.

She tastes…

Well…

Sweet, like the fruits Mother would allow me to pick when they were ripe.

No, Midoriko is not my mother; she is the one I….

Boldly Kirinmaru dug his face into her slit, squeezing her ass with his hands, lashing his tongue to that sensitive bud. Midoriko felt like she was flying when he hit a particular spot with his lips as she dug her left hand into his soft hair, pleading to him to go further with his licking. Her other hand squeezed her breast, holding onto that sea of pleasure. Midoriko gave a gentle squeak from her lips, at the cusp of her peak, which Kirinmaru let go of her gracefully, planting a kiss on her soft stomach.

That someday would be full.

Midoriko glanced at Kirinmaru with glassy eyes, his hair wanton like a whore, and lips wet with her juices. “Did I do alright…Midoriko…” His gaze softened, watching her trying to catch her breath from being eaten out by a man. He gently kissed her lips, allowing her to savour her juices. 

“Yes…”

Midoriko seems a little quieter than usual, reluctantly touching the puffiness of her labia. “How about you?”

“I am alright…”

Midoriko’s eyes stared at his stiff member, fascinated by that length that rubbed between her inner thighs. “I have to tell you something, Kirinmaru; I thought that men used their cocks…” She found herself blushing at that word cock . Shit, I sound like Kitsu herself , commenting on those unruly peasants who would harrow a chance to see a walking prostitute and force themselves on these girls. “To well… you know…to pee…”

Kirinmaru found himself trying not to laugh at that comparison. “Acute observation priestess—for one being so holy…” Midoriko chewed her bottom lip, trying to cup her slit to prevent the juices from leaking out of embarrassment. “You are well-learnt…” Kirinmaru chided her, noticing a small dewdrop forming on the tip of his member, allowing Midoriko to kiss him quietly.

“Kitsu told me when men are aroused, I could be full with their child, which I promised I would never allow to happen.” Kirinmaru felt pity for Midoriko as he kissed her on the back of her neck to soothe her anger. “It is baseless…” Midoriko proclaimed to Kirinmaru. “I am no mother; I am no bride… I am well…”

“King…” 

Kirinmaru laughed a little.

“Where did you learn this?” Midoriko raised her eyebrow, why the hell did his romantic notions pierced my heart. 

“My books…and travelling the world….” Kirinmaru smiled wistfully at Midoriko. “I have seen things, Midoriko—more than you think. And you…” Before he could finish his musing of what these kings do, Midoriko puffed her cheeks, using her slender fingers to hold his member, stroking it in different directions to make it hard. Her eyes widened with curiosity when Kirinmaru found himself grunting in pain over that pull. How could one organ bring a man down?

What is that feeling?  

That hardness seemed pleasant to him, seeing his essence dribbling on her hand.

Midoriko’s eyes twinkled with mischief, to hear Kirinmaru gasp when she used that same hand to wrap around his member, giving it a tight squeeze, while the other hand fondled his globes. 

Kirinmaru made a guttural cry that could still the cool wind when she made that final pull, that stars were bursting in front of his eyes.

Kirinmaru forced himself to catch his breath, reeling from that high. “A little too excited? Priestess?” he asked, seeing Midoriko’s hand wet with his essence, giving a parting squeeze to his member and balls, watching her wipe the split seed onto his bare chest.

Midoriko reluctantly kissed the tip of his spent member, savouring the saltiness of his essence on her tongue. “You make me feel better…say, what would Mahiruma think when he hears that I am king…” His eyes softened as she gave a kiss to Kirinmaru’s forehead. “That god, so eager for us to be together, how unusual…” 

Kirinmaru’s dumb expression made Midoriko feel at ease.

“What Hiru? That god…I do not know how he sees things on top of his ivory tower.…” Kirinmaru shrugged his shoulders, forcing himself to take some deep breaths after that moment of pleasure. “He would hate our guts, my king…”

Midoriko blinked again. “Then….what shall we do…” Little did she know that her lips were caressed with his, feeling his fingers touching her slit, wet with anticipation for what was to come. “If he finds us, then we will be dead…” She found herself hiccuping in fear over that union.

What if it is horrible?

What if.

What if.

“Let this moment be alive, even if it is only for a brief moment.” With his fingers sticky from her juices, Kirinmaru stroked his member and gently positioned it to her entrance. Kissing her neck, he calmly pushed himself inside of her, minding her winces. “For I am your servant, my king…”

Kirinmaru forced himself to shut his eyes, smelling the blood that trickled on the ground. 

Make her comfortable.

Make her comfortable. 

Make…

Make her….

Midoriko groaned quietly at that burning sensation. “Well, it hurts more than what Kitsu said…”

“Huh…” Kirinmaru forced himself to pull away, Midoriko heaved peacefully at Kirinmaru forcing himself to lay on her shoulder, catching his breath. “I am sorry…we don’t need to continue on if you don’t want…” 

“No….”

Midoriko’s gaze grew determined, snaking her hand in between their bodies, teasing the swollen bud to rekindle that fire in their bellies. “I am fine to be with you, Nishi, even if it hurts and makes a certain god angry…”

Kirinmaru nodded quietly, feeling Midoriko’s hand cupping his cheeks. “It would. If I did not have you at my side, he may chase me out of the shrine…” He heaved again, and pushed himself again into her insides, kissing her ever softly to soothe any discomfort.

Midoriko found herself biting her bottom lip, digging her nails into Kirinmaru’s shoulders when he made a firm thrust.  

Instead of pain, it would linger into pleasure.  

“That feels…” Before Midoriko could finish her statement, Kirinmaru smiled peacefully when he made another thrust again with his cock, allowing her to make an ungodly mewl. “Gods, Nishi…I…I” They alternated between soft caresses and thrusts, figuring out what parts consumed them, with Midoriko kissing him so deeply that his lips grew puffy at every smack. And Kirinmaru heaved the act, focusing his burning energy on raining kisses on her neck and soft breasts.

The signs of her reaching her precipice were high, making Kirinmaru even more determined to sacrifice his body for his king. The constant biting of her bottom lip, breasts bouncing at every push, her face flushed with the blood flowing through her brain, her heels digging upon the tailbone of his back, hungering for Kirinmaru to bury his member even deeper into her body. And how she wailed at his name so clearly that even the buried couple could be deafened by their coupling.

And that moment became that fire that consumed both Kirinmaru and Midoriko.  She screamed his name loudly before becoming silent. And Kirinmaru followed, with a groan onto her supple neck.

And before long—it was simply extinguished.

Not with fear, but with the pure connection. 

Kirinmaru was first to awake, cocooned by that strange warmth, tracing Midoriko’s scar up and down, eyes heavy with deep love and her heartbeat tranquil. 

In that moment of serendipity, Kirinmaru forgot that a deal was made between him and Arata. However, a shiver went down his spine, when he realized that he forgot to tear her heart out. With his eyes saddened, Kirinmaru let go of Midoriko’s side, kissing her damp forehead and soft lips, before quickly getting changed into his clothes.

Kirinmaru gazed wistfully at her, watching her heaving chest move back and forth in deep slumber. He thought of leaving the treasured pin quickly in her hands; however, he swallowed that fear, snatching it away from her hands, and instead kissed her soft fingertips and knuckles. He must keep Midoriko, not simply by his heart, but also by a simple pin to remember happier days. 

Quietly, Kirinmaru wrote a kanji 恋 on his hand and swallowed it to calm his nerves.

My king.

He constantly felt the edges of the pin over and over again.

I fear the moment I lay my body on your altar that I will perish.

////

In the haze of pleasure, Kirinmaru swore that he saw spectral animals following him around the forest, placing his finger between his teeth to savour that sweet taste of Midoriko’s sweat, only to feel the cold breeze in his body.

Oh, I did not tear out Midoriko’s heart, huh?

Kirinmaru found himself looking at the moon when he calmly clapped his hands in prayer to a nearby tree. His hands shivered, thinking about how he nearly tore Midoriko’s chest for her beating heart during that burning touch.

God. God.

Kirinmaru never thought of pleading to the strange god Mahiruma, but he needed to.

I need you.

For Midoriko and I…

Soon the aroma of tea infiltrated his nostrils, and he heard a voice so clear. “The girl has taken away your virginity…well good for you…I hope you are happy…” Calmly, Mahiruma offered a cup of tea, and soon whisked Kirihmaru away to a quiet corner. “Do not play coy; you are running away from that situation.”  

Kirinmaru pouted his lips a little when he saw a swirl of leaves cascading in the air. At least they had their leaves, and strangely a prayer came from his lips. 

“It goes like… oh Kami-sama, please grant Midoriko’s happiness, even if we are separated.” 

“You called me, and a wedding is about to come…” Mahiruma smiled mockingly at Kirinmaru, sipping the tea from his cup. “You are bold to lie, for a daiyoukai…and let alone…to your future wife. I would say congratulations on your marriage.” Even before he could say a word, Mahiruma pressed his finger into his lips. “If you want an answer to Midoriko’s happiness, you ruined the girl…I feel sad for hapless Sunako.” 

“How do you know…” 

Kirinmaru, a powerful daiyoukai, trembled over the words, from a minor god Mahiruma, and felt ashamed that he took long to reveal that truth.

Mahiruma shrugged his shoulders. “I know my fair share of gods…an invite is extended upon me, but seeing your situation, I pity you…you broke two hearts, a human—Midoriko—and that of your future wife Sunako—but then again, she would consume you…” 

“Listen, if anyone petitions, I am not willing to give. I think you are fascinating, and from my observations…” Mahiruma bluntly laid his hands onto Kirinmaru’s. “Love consumed you, petitioning me with the most beautiful shrine, would not guarantee a safe passage…” 

Kirinmaru held Mahiruma’s hands tightly, and found himself nearly wanting to vomit out of fear. “I promised to have her heart, but I could not. I thought a boar would be a great substitute, but I need to be unbound from Midoriko’s repression spell…” Kirinmaru calmly closed his eyes, forcing himself to make a small pearl out of his body. “Can you pass this to Midoriko, as payment…” Mahiruma’s eyes widened with amusement at that shimmering jewel. “My youki…for you to do as you will …and to conceal her from those who would harm her…”

“Interesting…” Mahiruma gazed at the many colours capturing it. “You are clever, Nishi….no, Kirinmaru…my instincts were right.” Mahiruma grinned quietly, holding the jewel in his hand. “I have yet to pinpoint what Midoriko means to you…I cannot protect her or you as you please. Usually, I would not intervene on your behalf, because your kind is meant to destroy. However, this is an interesting prize…a daiyoukai sacrificing a part of his energy to me.”

“For a sexless god like I—I questioned you…” Mahiruma quickly swirled his hands to make a small cup of tea, which he plucked a mushroom from the round to make a pink liquid. “Protecting a powerful priestess who would scorn your affections, and bribing one, she may find out who you are. Are you willing to die for her?”

I have been since the moment I gazed at her in the field.

“Please hold her beating heart, like how she held mine, and I shall leave you in peace Kami-sama…” 

Kirinmaru took that sip, finding his energy rushing in his veins, his long black hair becoming flaming red like his father’s, and his blunt nails becoming claws. Mahiruma nodded quietly, slowly dissolving into swirling tea leaves.

“Yes, do as you will…”

One wrong move and you are doomed to the consequences, daiyoukai. Your heart must forget Midoriko, if you must leave her in peace.

A/N: Funny enough, now I read it now, this chapter, which i nicknamed it as the ‘Abandoned hut sex scene’ is actually one of the few scenes I brainstormed in this story xD, partially I want better sex scenes for Midokirin LOL, and partially my brain just went nuts over here, though I did another big one which I will reveal much later.

Honestly, it is my third full-fledged Midokirin smut scene, like the do-it and all, which is way different from me doing the wedding night scene in ‘To enchanted lands and beyond’, as we have two individuals who, to some extent have that connection but to express it physically, it was a hoot, and I redraft it two times (one is without the story context and that version with the story context itself), though my favourite part is Kirinmaru finding the clit scene, which I find it so sweet and endearing, to show his tender-heartedness. And that point, he simply forgets about the deal and go with his heart which leads him to dire consequences, and his weakness of letting others push him to silence that voice.

In a David Lean-like elliptical ending of Kirinmaru leaving Midoriko to hunt for the heart, we are left to guess what is next.

Chapter Text

Chapter 8: So tell me where to put my love? Do I wait for time to do what it does?

Midoriko woke up, mumbling to herself. “Nishi…Hey…good..morning…” she uttered, reaching for him.

A thought planted in Midoriko’s mind. Where is he? She shrugged her shoulders, forcing herself to rise from her cocooning numbness. He should be somewhere; perhaps he was grabbing breakfast for them to enjoy, the warm sun bathing in their faces, or walking over to the grave of the buried couple to say kind words to them. “Hey…Nishi…where...”

Maybe I should be like Nishi. Midoriko found her thumb stroking the center of lips, thinking of Kirinmaru’s slow kisses that evening. There is no hurry; after all, the next village will be perhaps a few hours by foot.

Midoriko leisurely changed into her clothes, thinking of Nishi’s hands as she put on her kosode and hakama, taking the time to breathe in her own sweet aroma. That thought made her legs wobble, as her mind played to Nishi’s hands gently stroking her long locks. She emerged from the hut, lamenting the bright sunlight piercing through her face as she gazed at the grave, which was ever so still.

Wait, Nishi cannot be here… Midoriko thought to herself, quietly kneeling down to the edge of the grave and clapping her hands in prayer.

“May you find rest eternally…”

However, Midoriko’s mind constantly played those lucid thoughts over and over again as she walked away from the hut, hoping the greenery would be a testament to Nishi’s devotion to her.

I am his king. A king on his throne to rule the world. I am…I…

Maybe Midoriko’s reiki was right about his character after their encounter in the abandoned hut, kind and yet so strong.

However, reality shook Midoriko as she observed Kitsu gathering all of the items needed for their travels. 

“Oiiii!!!!!” At least Kitsu was right with her soul, after the game. She was at her usual, wanting to get things done hurriedly. “I think you were gone longer than usual…I thought you were supposed to meet another miko friend of yours…”

Midoriko shook her head.

“Huh???”

Midoriko gave a goofy smile, thinking about how brave Nishi was during the burial scene, making Kitsu perplexed regarding her rosy cheeks and messy hair. 

“Hello Princess, you seem all flushed…what happened to you and Nishi last night…Do you know where the hell our lost boy, Nishi, is?”

Midoriko scratched her head. “I do not know. All I recall, Kitsu-chan, is Nishi trembling in front of me in the hut, the couple…I...I…” 

“I think you are tired, Mii-chan…” Kitsu rolled her eyes and nudged Midoriko’s gaze over to the visage of the hut that was slowly swallowed by the cusps of nature. “Come…let’s go…” 

Midoriko’s mouth made a quiet oh sound.

Wait…Did… Kitsu thought to herself, seeing Midoriko act more girlish than her usual stoic nature: subconsciously bunching her hair back and forth, trying to catch Nishi’s scent in her hands. What the…

“Are you alright?” Kitsu grumbled to Midoriko. “You seem dazed from being in the hut. What exactly happened between you and Nishi…” She noticed Midoriko biting her lip playfully, her hands twitching over that thought.

“All I know is that…he…Do you know where he is?”

Kitsu gave a throaty laugh. “You contradict yourself, Mii-chan. Come, maybe the next village will get your head cleared up…what are you supposed to do with that miko friend of yours...”

“I…”

Midoriko wished for her memory of the hut to be buried in her heart, and hoped Nishi would come to her…

////

Quietly, Midoriko and Kitsu passed through the next village, where Midoriko watched a young couple enjoying their time looking at the pond, and a pair of birds flying in the sky. Little life came through here, where Midoriko and Kitsu were greeted by another miko—Sadako.

“Midoriko-sama…” Midoriko quickly snapped into reality at the other miko’s words. She saw Kitsu mouthing to her I will catch up with you later, because you know miko duties . 

Midoriko quickly bowed to Sadako. “Yes…”

“It is good to meet you, sister…” Sadako chirped quietly to Midoriko as they walked to the big temple where young women on cusp of maidenhood followed older priestesses into the confines of the temple, one younger miko sweeping the floor and another doing a trance over that said nameless god. 

“It is customary for a miko to cleanse herself from the dirt of the world with the pools of pure water before we speak to each other about our travels….. After all, maidenhood and godhood must correspond, Lady Midoriko…”

Midoriko forced herself not to think of Kirinmaru, but to accept the call.

Sadako ruefully called Midoriko. “And hence, you must go…” Quietly, they walked over to a beautiful spring. “My eyes will be those who would trespass our purity…” Sadako said, and witnessed Midoriko entering a clear spring, making a quick chant to be untainted from the evils of the world, before unveiling her body to the clear water.

Sadako noticed a huge gaping wound in between Midoriko’s breasts, but bit her tongue. Calmly, Midoriko did not think of Sadako watching her; only her thoughts of last night lingered in her brain as she washed her folds back and forth with the cool water. In her girlhood, she would be ashamed to feel that pleasure to be assumed as unholy as a common whore, but Nishi took her, without any thought if she was sanctified or not—in that hut, where no one watched their coupling, where Nishi saw her beyond that dazzling beauty. 

That she is a king, and yet an ordinary girl who has desires and needs.

Midoriko slowly brought the pools of water onto her chest, where she could feel the puffiness of the wound. She squinted her eyes, feeling the pain from that wound, with the thought lingering in her mind, did Nishi just…dig into my chest…that strength was not human at all.

Midoriko closed her eyes to recall that Kirinmaru shivered at the sight of blood on his hands, and proceeded to soothe her with his soft lips.

A mocking masculine voice came in her mind as she rubbed the pure water onto her body. A demon wanted to fill your belly with his child.

Midoriko felt a shiver down her spine as she quickly used her nails to scrape off the skin where Nishi defiled her.

Is Nishi the demon Mahiruma warned me about?

How could I be so stupid? 

How could I be so foolish?

The gods must not know.

The gods must not know.

Midoriko found herself weeping in the spring, covering her face with shame, daring not to see the flushed face in the shadows, cursing unholy remarks to the sky that the wind seemed to shake at her grief.

Sadako stared at her coldly. “Sister…what…gods…you…” Midoriko quickly covered her breasts with her hands. “Who did…you…” Quickly she yanked Midoriko out of the spring, making her shiver in the cold. 

“I…I…I…”

Sadako sighed. “You have blemished your maidenhood. Who made that scar between your breasts, you blemished whore…”:

“It…was…a companion of mine…” Midoriko forced herself to swallow his name. “I…can explain, swear by the spirits, I…I…” Sadako, unconvinced by Midoriko’s words, pushed her away from the spring, not allowing herself the space to get dressed into her priestess garbs.

“You have tainted yourself, Midoriko…whore…” 

“You are now in the world; no great deed will clear you for lying with a common man, let alone…a youkai….” Sadako mocked Midoriko. “He must have charmed you with the beauty of the world…” Midoriko glanced at Sadako placing paper talismans onto the spring, cleansing the tainted water.

“And henceforth, I shall leave you naked, like the day you are born, or in the truest form—the day you sell your body as a common whore….”

//

Midoriko thought that gods will turn a blind eye- watching Sadko furiously clapping her hands, pleading them for the foolishness of their now fallen sister. "Please, Sister Sadako, please....I....", her words become stuck to her throat, desprately hiding the scar that scarred her pure body. "Please...there must be a misunderstanding" Little flowers grew wildly at every step, but Sadako staed at her. "Midoriko- you are a fool...." Her cold tone gave Midoriko such a fright that she simply paralysed on that spring. "Giving your body to witless strangers....the gods has indeed abandoned you....". Sadako cruelly ripped her clothes off, leaving her scar exposed to the elements of the spring. “You are no longer fit....”

“Be away, whore....', and Midoriko stared blankly, numb by such heavy grief with Sadako’s cold words, refusing to give a kind eye to her. She is no longer pure in the eyes of the gods or her. 

Midoriko shut her eyes, mumbling to herself desperately over the rejection
“Gods....” furiously clapping her hands until it become red and puffy from constant clapping. They are not even awakened to her pleas. Midoriko's eyes stared at that spring- the once sacred venue, become tainted by her steps because she allow her carnality to be writhled in her veins on that very night. 

//

Kitsu frowned her eyebrows on that long disappearance of her friend as she paced herself up and down the temple steps. 

This seems not right, Mii-chan cannot disappear for so long .

Soon she heard the sobs of a young woman in the distance, at which Kitsu grabbed her fans, and ran over to the source of the sobs. She glanced over at a naked Midoriko huffing in agony, her face reddened from the heat, forcing herself to come out from the waters, mumbling angrily to the clouds, covering her breasts with her hands. “My people would need me…but…I am…I am…”

Kitsu carded her fingers through Midoriko’s long black hair. “Mii-chan, what is wrong…” she asked, glancing over her friend’s grieving expression, holding her hands steadily. “Tell me….” Kitsu glanced at the ugly scar in between her breasts. “Who did this to you…”

“Ni…Ni…Ni…”

Midoriko’s voice wobbled over that man, withholding her shock and instead allowing her to weep profusely into Kitsu’s chest.

“Nishi….Did he do this to you???” Kitsu curled her lip in anger as she helped Midoriko to cover that ugly scar with her clothes. “Was it about the trip to that said hut….” Oh, Nishi is going to be sorry for hurting my friend.

Midoriko grew confused as to whether to sanctify Kirinmaru for allowing her to open her heart, or to condemn him for allowing her to be cast aside like a common whore, as Sadako put it darkly.

“I do not know…I…I…” 

Midoriko began to weep again, which only added fuel to Kitsu’s fury. “Look, if I ever get to see Nishi’s goddamn face again, he will be fed to the vilest souls in the purgatory,” Kitsu hissed to the sky with the birds cawing in the distance. “IF YOU HEAR ME GODS, YOUR BLOODY CORPSES WILL BE PARADED….”

////

That night, Midoriko found her body heavy over the thought that she had indeed cast away the sacredness of her role as a priestess the evening that she surrendered her virginity to Nishi. She lazily touched the bumpy scar, her reiki calling another name. Kirinmaru. What the hell is that name? 

Goddamnit 

Goddamnit

Goddamnit

Goddamnit

Goddamnit

Midoriko dreamed strange dreams where she had a new life with Kirinmaru, only to feel the puffiness in her labia, frustrated that a ‘youkai’ in the guise of a handsome man tasted her ambrosia. She found herself holding back her sobs as she scratched her face profusely. 

“Mii-chan….”

Kitsu sat there quietly, carding Midoriko’s locks with her fingers. “The priestess did you dirty, I swear by the drunken gods that they have never known a concept called heartbreak. I remember one of my mentors, a grizzly man who lived in the mountains, told me a riddle when I was dealing with Ichi, you know the one who left me for another woman—a pretty girl at a village where they had an issue over a fox woman who sacrificed the liver of her offspring to lure men…”

“What gets bigger the more you take away from it?”

Midoriko shrugged her shoulders, feeling that emptiness inside of her from being deceived by Nishi. “I knew that answer much later: a hole—both physically and metaphorically. And Mii-chan, you just have to forget what he did…”

“But I cannot, because…because…because…” Saying his name stung Midoriko’s heart.

Midoriko hungered for Kirinmaru’s sweet touch, but she refused. She was a priestess who executed such holy justice.

“Just get some rest, and we will move somewhere else; there will be other people who will take you kindly…”

And that idiot Nishi.

That idiot deserved to rot in the sea of blood with all other women.

“That hole that Nishi left you, he should repay it tenfold…”

////

Mahiruma sat at the garden, feeling guilt in his stomach as he twisted the small pearl filled with Kirinmaru’s youki, only to see the little kitten constantly purring at him. “What do you have in mind, friend? I am just upholding his promise; I am not going to…” Quietly, he looked over the painted screens of his gardens to see Midoriko going awry over the villages she passed. 

A human forcefully taking tasks to fill that strange void. I knew it would be devastating. 

“Hey Mii-chan…” Kitsu swung a huge bottle of sake across the distance to Midoriko. “Stop pouting about that idiot…he will never come back. He is a douche, honestly.”

Mahiruma mumbled sadly. “Easier said than done…” He observed the paintings of the screens slowly coming to life: poor Midoriko. He forced himself not to look through the flashes of images, which Midoriko at night would stare into the dark sky, cursing the gods for planting her such an abundant love. 

During the day, Midoriko would forage around the forest, trying to run away from thoughts of Kirinmaru waiting for her in that same damn patch, smiling lecherously over her. She cast them away by tearing her hair off and simply wept loudly—grovelling whatever she could to disfigure her face.  

The human Kitsu was the only strength Midoriko had to actually stop weeping, but she, too, with her flaws, could only hold her tightly. “Mii-chan….Mii-chan, let’s move on…” Midoriko forced herself to steady her breaths, but her heart felt heavier, just that image of a handsome man serenading her heart. “Men like that bastard do not deserve your heart…”

“But Nishi…I…I…need to…” Midoriko croaked loudly. “Kitsu-chan, I…I…”

“Shhh…”

Kitsu smiled pensively. 

Mahiruma sighed a little. Midoriko-sama, I gave you that chance to forget him… He shut his eyes, only to see the danger and the destruction by Midoriko, only to feel the burning pain in his stomach, watching Midoriko try to trace her curves amidst stiff blankets, only to wail loudly at the inn that Kirinmaru did not intertwine his hands with hers, and did not speak prettily to her. Kitsu, being her anchor, offered Midoriko a round of drinks to drown the loud thoughts echoing in her brain.

“Mii-chan, you are better than this….” Kitsu slung her shoulders at Midoriko. “Come…we need to move away from the company of men…” 

Mahiruma shook his head, instead plucking a leaf from the tea bush, enchanting it with a command. “Watch the girl” he commanded, and slowly it floated away from his gardens—but instead of peace, Mahiruma found the bile building up even more, thinking of Midoriko’s grief.

What the hell is Kirinmaru thinking?

//////

Kitsu quietly grumbled to Midoriko as they gazed upon a market where she passed some mon to an old lady in exchange for a minute blessing for her business. “Mii-chan…you have been downtrodden! That is not good, that is not the Mii-chan who swore off the company of men. What the hell did that man do to you…”

He robbed me of everything…

Midoriko, however, held a silent scream, purposely rubbing pepper in her face to mar her beauty. Kitsu gripped Midoriko’s hands tightly, dragging her to a nearby river to wash her hands. “This is not the way, Mii-chan. You cannot mar that face of yours—even stupid men would be attracted by your beauty…”

Midoriko withheld her sniffles, only to gaze at the broken reflection of the river, trying to shut her eyes so she could see Kirinmaru holding her hand.

“If only I was blind to the fact that beauty would sting us.…”

Quietly that leaf slowly stuck upon Midoriko’s back, upon which she felt a quick sensation of relief, leading to brokenness in her heart. “I do not know, Kitsu-chan…I do not know….” 

A group of merchants gazed upon Midoriko. A young man wearing a purple jacket giggled at Midoriko’s sullen expression. “It is a pity that she marred her face…you can kiss her luscious lips, Ousuke, without feeling the sting of the bees…”

“The spirits took possession of a woman so ugly, idiot…” The other cackled at him. “Surprisingly, she still lingers, a beautiful one…”

That comment nearly made Kitsu’s blood boil, forcing herself to bite her tongue. “Like what is on her mind? She looks perfect for a night of revelry…” 

Kitsu immediately placed the blade of her fan onto the mocking merchant’s throat. “You are too much. Men, like pigs…deserved to be…” 

Midoriko pleaded to Kitsu with tears streaming in her eyes. “Kitsu-chan, these words mean nothing! I deserve to be their whore…you do not need to…”

“SHUT UP, MII-CHAN! YOU CANNOT LET A MAN RUIN YOU, YOU NEARLY DIED FIGHTING FOR THAT IDIOT!” 

“I do not, Kitsu-chan…” Midoriko protested loudly. “I…want…answers…what did I do…to deserve such a fate…I…I…” She surrendered herself to the hands of the merchant, unaware that they smelled like sake and cheap perfume. “I…I…I…” That leaf rattled loudly, touching a part of Midoriko’s reiki.

Midoriko found her body growing warmer and warmer, smelling the sweet perfume of crushed tea in her body. She found herself weeping like a little child, watching the figment of a man holding her, casting the unsuspecting merchants into formations of mud and blowing the leaves to let Kitsu fall asleep, preventing her from causing ugly scars and limbs strewn on the ground.

I…I…I…

I…I…I…I…

Kitsu-chan, forgive me…How could I be so foolish to offer my maidenhood to a foolish man?

/////

Midoriko. My king. Please understand. 

Kirinmaru forced himself to climb upon the edge of the cliff, catching his breath. His hands were bloodied from ripping the heart from a plump female boar before he clasped that heart into his chest. 

The strange comfort Kirinmaru took for himself as he quietly rubbed his bottom lip, forcing himself to taste the blood from the slain boar. In exchange for his serenity with Midoriko, he would pour his heart unto Sunako. 

Your heartbeat shall be yours, not mine, my…

Kirinmaru’s melancholic thoughts were broken when he heard the caw of a crow. He shut his eyes. The aura of the crow filled Kirinmaru with a little strength. One of the ravens slowly landed upon his shoulder, and he knew that Sunako and Zero would be fooled into thinking this was Midoriko’s beating heart.

“Yes, take me back, O drunken gods…I have taken what is hers…”

Quietly, Kirinmaru drifted off to sleep, with the blood of the boar slowly seeping upon his dirtied clothes, imagining his goddess making her dance to his body, the final sacrifice. 

/////

A gentle voice vibrated in Midoriko’s ears. “Let it out.” Midoriko frowned a little; this must be a dream that a kind passerby, shimmering amidst the darkness, rescued an unholy priestess like me.

It must be a joke.  

A gentle plop echoed in Midoriko’s ears, at which she rubbed her eyes to the sight of Mahiruma’s gardens. Not long ago, it was that god who warned her about the shortcomings of her love.

But instead of Mahiruma being vindictive over that sorrow, Mahiruma gave a resigned smile. “I am listening, Midoriko-sama…” He said; his stomach churned as he glanced at the small jewel dissolving into a cup of tea. 

“That idiot! That idiot…” Midoriko protested loudly to Mahiruma. “What did I do to deserve such agony, am I stupid? Am I…” Mahiruma smiled pensively at Midoriko, passing her the cup of tea to let her drink it slowly, and touching her face to heal all her wounds. 

“God, if you are kind, please take away that pain! Take away that pain! Take away that pain.”

Mahiruma withheld his anger to allow Midoriko’s tears to stain his clothes, taking slow breaths to hear her wails, that her arms and skies emptied after she buried the couple with Nishi.

“You are hurt…You are lost...” Mahiruma chided quietly to Midoriko. “You are strong, Midoriko, and the gods will never hold you…that man, Kirinmaru…should be tried for a crime to damn your heart.”

Kirinmaru.

Midoriko frowned her eyebrows. What the hell is that name? She continued to weep again until her eyes were puffy and her face was strewn with snot. “Apologies…” Mahiruma smiled sheepishly. “No that…Nishi…”

“See, Midoriko-sama, you said that you will love that said ‘Nishi’ regardless of bad or painful memories. This is a consequence you must bear, because the love you carried may be unfavourable to others…”

Mahiruma allowed Midoriko to reach for his hand, seeing the shimmering yoki from Kirinmaru settle her weary bones. “You are allowed to stay here as long as you need, Midoriko-sama…” Slowly, the little calico kitten came by to Midoriko, using her paws to wipe away the tears, purring at her side. “If you need to weep again, this companion will listen…”

Midoriko looked over at the cat’s mischievous seafoam green eyes, and pet her soft fur, feeling assured by her familiarity. “Kami-sama, what is that animal companion called? Does she have a name, god…”

“Haia…Nimble…..Midoriko-sama.”

Mahiruma shrugged his shoulders, looking over the paintings of the mortal world, watching Kitsu slowly falling asleep on the ground, and the men still in the mud. “I need to clear my actions, which you, priestess, will be the only one to witness…if you ever have the urge to leave…” Quietly, Mahiruma pressed the leaf to his lips, transmuting it to a beautiful crane bowing at Midoriko’s sacred aura. 

“Take my friend to lead you home, for the world took more strength from you than it gives…”

Calmly, Mahiruma planted his feet onto the grounds of the dead earth, allowing the decay to consume him. “However that is the nature of that said world, that you, and perhaps I, a tired god, must accept.”

Midoriko quietly pet the crane on the head, and the kitten, Haia, curled up on her lap, offering quiet moments of contemplation in the garden.

Note: This chapter, like many others, as you see took forever, during that dark period last year- I was really struggling mentally hence the long gap to do other things, but now I am in a much better place to talk about it.

This chapter is more like a response to the hurt I dealt with an ex-colleague who ghosted me, because for specific reasons and coming back to my office without any decorum resurfaces that said feelings, I was hungering to write feminine rage, which I did write about Midoriko being messy, but it was the part when Midoriko went down a downward spiral, knowing that a daiyoukai kinda f**k her, is where I placed all my darkness in me into her, which I was mentally struggling over consequences of placing too much trust to that certain someone. And to some extent, I am glad to write it, as I wish I have a Mayonaka to yell over and cry over- and have animal friends to keep me company because I feel I do not have it.

To some extent, I want you- become a piece to embrace the messiness in life which I never touched so personally until now, and to be real is very validating. Funny enough the title of that chapter came from My Love by Florence + The Machine which at that moment I played it so many times during that said heartbreak, and it is super cathartic to me :'D

And it is the start of me being so merciless over Kirinmaru, as he got his end of the deal- which he has to marry Sunako, I should not be evil to him, but I secretly enjoying doing it LOL

Chapter Text

Chapter 8.5: A gift which one do not deserve

The crows abruptly landed Kirinmaru upon the moist grasses, upon which he vaguely stared at the surroundings of his landing. Why the hell am I in my land ? he wondered, and he constantly checked the heart. The shiretokko pin, bathed in blood, still held its beauty and his mind still thought that his king would save him one day from this hell. 

However, a sacrifice must be made in order for my king to live.

My King, you must live without me.

Kirinmaru bleakly recognized Konton on sight, only hearing the muffed shouts that Kirinmaru came home with a prize, so beautiful and so rare.  “It has been a while,” Kirinmaru said, and rolled his lip a little, cradling that bloodied heart in his hands, trembling at the sight.

Zero came in gently, lifting Kirinmaru from the mud and dirt, shooing the crows away from pecking at his scarred flesh. “You did what Sunako requested, huh?” 

Kirinmaru held the heart, still oozing with blood, and Zero curled her lips upon such a grisly sight.

“Good.”

Her laconic words made Kirinmaru’s heart even heavier.

“We shall depart immediately, Kirinmaru, for you have overextended your visit for such a gift….” Kirinmaru quietly nodded at Zero’s words, numb over the rain that poured upon his dirtied clothes, unaware of the leaves that danced at his sight, only to be blanketed by beady eyes and the sound of crows echoing his ears. “Now I need to figure out how to make you presentable to Kurayami-sama, given that you look as if you fought the animals in the woods and drank their blood.”