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The box turtle wakes up like he does everyday: falling out of his hammock.
A semi-loud thud and an “Ughhhh” ensues, and Mikey starts his day. He always wakes up earlier than his brothers and father so he can have breakfast done by the time they get up.
Today, he decides to make blueberry pancakes with fluffy yellow eggs on the side. As he starts getting everything ready, he feels the sinking feeling in his chest. “Eeh, I'm sure it's nothing, probably just hungry or something,” he continues to ignore it, focusing on breakfast instead.
It's Raph that comes down first to the kitchen. He greets the youngest turtle with a soft smile and a gentle head pat. "Good morning, Mikey, what did you make today?” The box turtle pushes the overwhelming feeling of sadness in his stomach, puts a smile on, and looks up at his oldest brother. “Blueberry pancakes with scrambled eggs!” He gives a soft smile as he hands his brother his plate of food.
The next to come down is Donnie. As usual, he always waits until Raph or someone else goes in first; while he hates being first, he also hates being the last to Mikey’s breakfast. Being the second one to come down was perfect (just how the purple, sleep-deprived turtle likes it).
He enters with a tired, “Good morning Raph, Michael. What's for breakfast today?”
The oldest speaks up before the youngest gets a chance. “Blueberry pancakes and eggs!” he says with his mouth full of his delicious food as he continues to chew with a grin on his face.
“Ah, yes, Raph, I totally wanted you to answer me with a mouth full of food. I absolutely was not asking the chef about the meal he made." He says it with a lot of sarcasm so his siblings are aware he's being sarcastic. However, the snapper turtle doesn't seem to care or notice, continuing to enjoy his food.
The painful sarcastic turtle then turns to the youngest. Mikey pushes the heartbreaking sadness and overwhelming feeling further down, to the point where it’s at his toes; it feels like if he so much as stubbed one, he would break apart at the seams. He looks at his older purple genius brother with a smile.
"It's okay, Dee! I'm just glad he's enjoying the food. Anyway, yes, we are having blueberry pancakes with eggs, and yes, before you ask, I made your eggs especially fluffy for you!" he says with an ongoing smile as he hands his genius but picky eater brother his plate.
“Awe, thanks, Mikey, you're the best!" Donnie makes his robo-arm pat the box turtle on the head with a smile on his face before he sits at the table. Mikey knows Donnie likes his eggs extra fluffy because of how the texture feels in his mouth, so he always makes sure they’re fluffy enough for his brother to enjoy breakfast too. He's also aware about how much his brother doesn't quite enjoy hugs (or physical affection, for that matter) that much, so he takes no offense to the robo-arm replacing Donnie’s real one.
Finally, the second oldest comes down for breakfast. Leo always comes down last because he, quote unquote, “needs his beauty sleep, all this doesn't happen without proper sleep.” So it wasn't new for him to be last.
He enters and gives the youngest a noogie. “Hello, our little personal chef. What have you perfected today, Miguel?"
Mikey is on the verge of tears at this point. The feeling is so overwhelming but he is determined to keep it together until he's alone.
“Haha, thanks, Leo, but it's just some simple blueberry pancakes and eggs! Nothing special,” he chuckles weakly as his brother lets go of him.
“Awe, come on, Mikey, don't say that! You make every meal special! Like, for real, I've never tasted better cooking. Basic or not, your pancakes and eggs are sent from heaven. I've never tasted anything as good! You've got to give yourself more credit, lil bro!” Leo insists as he takes his plate and sits down with his brothers.
“Awe, thank you Leo,” Mikey says with a smile as he makes himself a plate. He tries to eat fast, but not too fast so it doesn't drag unnecessary attention to himself. They all eat in silence; when they finish, they all thank Mikey and go on their way to do their usual morning routine.
Finally alone, Mikey heads up to his room and closes the door behind him, sighing heavily. He could finally cry, let it out in peace, without worrying anyone. He walks slowly to his closet, where he has built a little hide away, complete with a pillow to sit on, a few stuffed animals, some fairy lights he found, and some art supplies. He sits down and slowly closes the closet doors before finally letting himself break down.
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Leo's in his room, reading his comics and just hanging out as usual, when he realizes.
It's been a few hours since breakfast, and Leo notices that he hasn’t seen Mikey once since, and that's a little weird, especially for Mikey. Usually, by now, he’s come to bug him or Donnie with art concepts or whatever is interesting to him at that moment, or just to watch them do whatever they’re doing in silence. Either way, this felt weird, and Leo’s starting to get a little worried; his “older brother senses” tingling. He gets up from his beanbag, puts the comic down, and goes to look for the youngest of his brothers.
He looks everywhere; the game room, the tv room, the kitchen, the dojo, Donnie and Raph's room, all of which lead to nothing. That must mean Mikey’s in his room. Either that or he's left, and he'd be in deep trouble for leaving without saying anything, so Leo doubts his brother would be that rebellious. He walks to Mikey’s door and knocks lightly...
No answer.
Leo lets himself in (he’s obviously allowed, being Mikey’s brother after all). He glances around the room,.only to find nothing. He starts to worry, wondering if Mikey WOULD be that stupid to leave without saying anything. Just as he’s about to leave to hunt Mikey down, he hears soft crying and quiet hyperventilating. Suddenly alert, he turns around and then hears it again…
He eventually pinpoints it to the young box turtle's closet and stands there for a minute or so…He hears his little brother crying, mumbling to himself…
“Useless…”
“Gosh Mikey, you're so sensitive, it's pathetic…”
“You can't do nothin’ right anymore…"
“You're so weak and pathetic…”
Leo doesn't know what to do. He just stands there, wide-eyed as he hears his adorable, sunshine, always optimistic little brother degrade himself. Crying. In his closet. Alone.
How long had he been like this? Hours, it seems. That would explain why Leo hasn't seen him. As Mikey keeps mumbling to himself Leo continues to stand there until Leo just walks away to contemplate what he just saw and heard.
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Leo sits on his bed in silence.
Did I just see what I think I just saw? Mikey, crying in his closet, alone and degrading himself?
…No. Mikey would never. He'd come talk if he was sad... Right? At least… I thought he would. How long has he been doing this? Days. Months. Years?
Leo knows he has to do something. He can’t just leave and do nothing, knowing his little sunshine baby brother is hurting so much.
I mean, Mikey always lights up a room everywhere he goes! He's always so… cheery and happy and he always helps everyone, no matter who that was! Mikey, he had the biggest heart and was the most talented of them all! It was kinda hard to believe that he would ever think of himself like that.
Either way, Leo has to do something. And not just due to the fact that it's his baby brother who he loves to death. Mikey has always helped his brothers when they needed mental help. He was like…
Our little… therapist. Leo then realizes…
We've made Mikey a therapist. And now he feels like he can't talk to us, because he thinks it's his job to listen, not to be listened to. Leo's heart breaks right there. He’d made his little brother think he couldn't talk about his own feelings. He wants to cry his eyes out, he felt so bad. But he was not about to make this about himself. For once, this is about Mikey.
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Mikey has finished crying and is currently collecting himself.
“Come on, Mikey. You can do this! Just go out there and do your usual razzmatazz! Come on. For your brothers…" Mikey walks out of the closet and his room, closing both doors behind him. He first heads to Donnie's room to check up on him…
But he wasn't there.
Oh, well, Mikey shrugs as he goes to Raph's room. Not there either?
…Weird. Usually, he's working out right now.
Oh well, I guess, Mikey concludes, relatively less confident as he treads to Leo's room. He's not there either.
Okay, now this is freaky. Did they leave without him? They wouldn't do that. Mikey looks everywhere but cannot find his brothers. Or his father. Now, he knows something is wrong. His dad is always either watching TV or asleep by now. Pushing back the nerves balling up in his throat, Mikey waits in the TV room for his family to find him and wonders where they are.
He'll watch Jupiter Jim while he waits.
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Leo has gathered his whole family on a rooftop to discuss what he's found out.
The genius speaks first. "Okay, Leo what is it? I have work to do, and I don't really have time for this right now."
Leo looks at them for a second to ponder what he should say.
“…Look. I know this might seem far-fetched, but…”
“…What's wrong Leo?" Raph asks, a worried look on his face,
“Yes, Blue, what is it? I have a TV show to watch and I'm missing it right now–”
“It's about Mikey” Leo spits out. Well, no going back now.
“…what about Mikey??'' The oldest brother insists. Now, his whole family has a curious and worried face.
“Look, uhm…I went to go look for him earlier because I noticed I hadn't seen him in a while and I… was worried and… uhm..."
“What happened Leo…” his purple twin demands.
“I found Mikey crying. In his closet. Degrading himself, a-and hyperventilating, he… he was calling himself pathetic and useless and weak and just talking down on himself! I didn't know what to do! So, th-that's why I brought you here. I've realized that we've all been using Mikey as a therapist. And now, he doesn't feel like he can talk about his feelings or his problems because he's the listener not the listened to!
“So… I was hoping we could discuss what we should do because… there's no way we can leave Mikey like this…”
Everyone falls silent for about two minutes until Donnie finally speaks up. “…So what should we do? Mikey’s in pain. He has been for who knows how long and we’re just finding out now?! We have to do something. Today.” They all now have the look of determination on their faces the oldest spoke next.'' So what's the plan?"
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It’s been hours since Mikey last saw everyone. He's starting to get worried. He calls Raph again.
Straight to voicemail.
Well, now he's really worried. Raph always picks up the phone, especially when it's Mikey. He starts to pace back and forth, worrying about his family for what felt like hours, almost all day, even, until finally, they came down the manhole.
“WHERE HAVE YOU GUYS BEEN?? I'VE BEEN WORRIED!! YOU GUYS DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING, A-AND RAPH, YOU DIDN'T PICK UP YOUR PHON-!!!”
Mikey’s cut off by Raph picking him up. Hugging him tightly in his arms without saying anything. It quickly turns into a group hug between the whole family, and then Leo finally speaks.
“Mikey…I heard you in the closet…” Mikey's heart drops, and he starts crying, but he doesn't even notice.
His softshell brother speaks next. “Mikey, you know we love you, right? And we’re sorry for treating you like a therapist–”
Mikey cuts him off. “No, guys! It's okay, I swear! I don't mind and I'm oka-”
“No, Mikey,” Raph interrupts, “it's not okay. We are your brothers, not your clients. And we are so sorry. And no, no, you're not okay. And that's okay. Please, Mikey. Talk to us about what's going on…”
It's silent for a few minutes. Mikey doesn't know what to say.
Then his father speaks. “Michelangelo, my son. It is not healthy to keep that bottled up. You wouldn't wish the same for your brothers. So why do it to yourself? My son, please. Tell us.”
Mikey starts crying even more. Then he breaks and tells them everything. How he feels so weak and useless compared to everyone else. Everything pours out like a waterfall, and he is bawling his eyes out the whole time and looking down in shame of looking this way in front of his brothers. He apologizes so many times for being a burden and making them go through all this trouble. Yet no one says a word until Mikey’s done. When he is, he looks up, only to be swept up in a group hug. It's silence for a few minutes. Until finally Leo speaks.
“Mikey. You are never a burden. You’re not weak. Hell, you're a lot stronger than us most of the time! You're the best brother we could have asked for! You're not pathetic, you're extraordinary! You're the sunshine to everyone's day! We love you so much, Mikey. And we’re sorry you've held this in so long. But it's not going to be like that anymore, okay? Next time you ever feel sad or anything, you come and get one of us. And we will be there, no judgment. It's not a burden at all.”
They all say in unison "We love you, Mikey." Mikey is still sobbing despite the slight glimmer of peace in his heart. The rest of the night, they spend cuddling on the couch, watching Mikey's favorite movies, and eventually, they all fall asleep together.
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