Archive of Our Own ^beta

Fandom : One Piece
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Summary : Sanji decided to go to his beloved mom.
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A/N : Just felt depressed and decided to convey my dark thoughts into a story heroing Sanji instead of me.
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Story Title : Sayonara Jensei
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Sanji always was a secretive and a quite kid, he endured pain without telling his family about his problems. not that his abusive family will care anyway.
since his mother passed away and he lost the biggest pillar of his life. there's only his sister Reiju to support him now but still his sadness and depression were too strong.
Sanji had always read those macabre stories were people cut their wrists and end their bad lives.
Sanji always wondered about ending his life with those abusive monsters but the idea of cutting his wrist felt so painful. would he endure the pain of cutting his wrist, he always wondered.
but one day he felt that there's no reason for him to stay alive. his mother was dead, his pillar was dead, and the idea that he would have to leave in this pain for the rest of his life wasn't comforting at all.
"i-if I died like extremely young, and d-died at the age of 20, does that mean I have to live like this for another 11 years! another 11 years with father and siblings!" Sanji cried and hiccuped. he was all alone in his room, with none to share his sadness with him but him self. even with Reiju's consolation the life wasn't bearable.
he knew that they would be gathering on the dining room now and of course none will miss him except for Reiju. if father insisted on summoning him to meal that's just so he can humiliate him in front of his siblings. not for an impossible reason like caring for his health.
he thought none would hear him if he broke the vase, so he held the vase and hit the wall with it. the vase broke into sharp peaces.
Sanji took a big and sharp peace then laid on his bed. he remembered that he had the door closed and then got up, took out the key from the key hole and put it on the floor in the space between the bottom of the door and the ground. he doesn't want to trouble Reiju opening the door and finding his dead body.
he laid back on the bed and inhaled sharply, "just think of a beautiful memory with mom and Reiju and then you won't feel the pain" he tried to encourage himself. "it's just a one time pain Sanji, a temporary pain to gain a permanent rest. no pain no gain" Sanji told himself and began crying, his tears were running inside of his ears.
who could have thought that a little 9 years old kid whose supposed to know nothing about life's hardship and suicide yet is now attempting suicide. but getting exposed to such cruelness at such a young age can make a child matured beyond his peers.
Sanji bit a towel and with one fast swift slash Sanji cut his wrist. he almost screamed if not for the towel in his mouth muffling the noise.
Sanji's cut wrist was now stretched out of the bed, blood dripping to the ground below.
"Sanji! Sanji what are you doing! you should come to dinner" he heard the voice of Reiju from outside the door. the knob turned but the door won't open.
Sanji whimpered, he felt ashamed for his weakness, he felt ashamed for not saying goodbye to Reiju, but it's all going to be fine. he's going to mother, mother would know how to fix it like she always knew how to fix everything.
Sanji took the towel out of his mouth, "I don't feel hungry Reiju no nee chan, please go back to eat" Sanji said in a normal voice, he didn't want to trouble Reiju with him. his tears increased, he was laying there with blood gushing out of his artery, taking his lost breath and yet answering coolly as if nothing life-threatening happening on the other side of the door.
it was a sad scene, even someone with no heart would cry because of it.
"come on stop being stubborn" Reiju said and hit the door with her small fist several times.
"I am going to mother. take care of yourself Reiju" Sanji said in a low voice and closed his eye forever.
on the other side Reiju was still hitting the door, "you know! father left the table earlier and said that he has some business to attend. come out now, if any of the other brats decided to bad mouth you I'll slap him" she said encouragingly.
suddenly she saw a glinting gold key on the ground, the tip was to the outside of the room. Reiju held the long key and wondered how it did come here. she used the key to open the door and a metallic scent invaded her nostrils.
Reiju's eyes widened at what she saw, there in the bed laid her baby brother Sanji, he looked peaceful and blood was dripping from his wrist to a pool of blood in the ground.
"S-Sanji!" she said in a daze, "S-Sanji!" she approached cautiously.
"S-Sanji!"
"SANJIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII" she screamed till the whole palace heard her scream.
"baby brother!" she tried again and tried to shook him to no avail.
"I am sorry, I am sorry am sorry am sorry am sorry SANJIIIIII" she cried and hugged him, feeling too much hatred towards her father and siblings.