Archive of Our Own ^beta

“Are you sure I look OK, Bobby?” Teddy asks for probably the tenth time. Bob sighs but the soft huff is affectionate. Thankfully, Teddy’s gotten a lot better at telling when Bob is genuinely annoyed. Linda is still in the bathroom because she’s got a good thing going with Savory. They haven’t thrown her out for pretending to be an attendant yet and the extra money from tips helps when they inevitably overshoot their budget.

At least that’s what Linda tells Teddy when he asks. He knows that Bob and Linda used to go to Rudy’s mostly until Linda convinced Bob to try new things once in a while. Savory is a step up from the seafood place, if you’re into decent burgers and hipsters.

Not that Teddy will ever tell Bob that he still likes Savory’s burgers. Not after that first disastrous visit when Teddy betrayed his best friend over a burger. Teddy still has nightmares about Bob throwing him out of the restaurant for his serious lack of loyalty.

Although now Bob and Linda are the ones to wake him from his nightmares, Teddy remembers with a grin as he pulls at his soft yellow dress shirt. He’s only been dating them for a few months (and only sharing their bed for a few weeks) but the man can genuinely say that he’s never been happier. Being with his two best friends in all the best ways–and being part of their family for real now–makes Teddy wish that he’d gotten evicted and moved in with them years ago.

“You look fine, Ted,” Bob says as Linda returns, grinning triumphantly with a wad of cash and coins in her hand. “This place isn’t that fancy.”

Teddy smiles at Bob and then Linda as she sits down and coos over their appetizers: pigs in a blanket with some fancy name that Teddy’s already forgotten.

Linda shoves a pig in her mouth and talks with her mouth full. “It’s fancy enough! A lady just tipped me twenty bucks to hold her purse!” Linda swallows loudly and then pats Teddy’s hand across the table. “And you look very handsome, Honey.”

Teddy basks in the attention for a moment before his smile disappears. “I just want this night to go well, you know? It’s our first fancy date together! I, uh, don’t have a lot of luck with those.”

Bob and Linda look at each other, frowning. Teddy can guess what’s going through their heads. They’re not shy with their opinions on Denise, Teddy’s ex-wife–Linda is especially vocal when it comes to Teddy’s wrongs.

Linda pulls her purse out from under the table to put away her tips. She also pulls out three little boxes. A whiff of cloying sweetness meets Teddy’s nose.

“These are for you guys,” Linda says as she hands one box to each man, nearly equally spaced apart from her, and leaves the last in front of herself. “I found them at Fresh Feed last week in the clearance section!”

“Ooo!” Teddy exclaims. Bob smirks but Teddy knows that he’s just as impressed with Linda’s thrifty nature. It’s the only way that they keep their heads above water. Although Teddy being part of the family is helping with the finances…now that Bob and Linda help him get paid for his work.

They open their boxes as Linda eats more appetizers and orders another glass of wine from their server checking up on them. Inside are votive candles in little glass holders.

“Ted’s is ‘ocean sunrise,’ Bobby’s is ‘ocean sunset,’ and mine is ‘ocean coral.’ I don’t know what coral smells like but mine is the best!” Linda says with a smile. She moves the candles into a row, with her red candle sandwiched between Teddy's orange and Bob's purple.

Bob eyes the candles as their food arrives. “Why all the ocean scents?”

Linda takes a bite of her fish before she answers, chewing enthusiastically. Teddy knows all about Bob and Linda’s argument over Rudy’s some time ago. He's especially happy to see Linda eating her salmon with such gusto. Bob has a steak and Teddy has chicken. He’s not dumb enough to get a burger again–not tonight.

“They must have been getting rid of their summer stuff to make room for autumn. I also bought a box of pumpkin-shaped donuts. They’re a little wonky but they were on discount, too.”

“Well, thank you, Lin,” Bob says as they eat. “But why candles?”

Linda leans over, lowering her voice to a conspiratorial (and sexy, in Teddy’s opinion) murmur. Teddy quickly brushes her sleeve out of the way of her plate as she explains. “Because we finally convinced the kids to spend the night with Gayle–”

“Bribed the kids, Linda. Bribed. And Louise fleeced us bad.” Bob cuts in.

“Yeah, yeah.” Linda waves a hand and Bob moves the lit table candle out of range. “Anyway, the kids are gone for the night so I figured, why not do the whole ‘fancy date night’ nine yards? Candles, bubble bath–”

Teddy blushes and almost chokes on his chicken. Sure, he and his partners sleep together and sleep together now. But there’s something so intimate about dinner at a nice restaurant and candles and bubbles…Denise never did that sort of thing with Teddy.

Bob frowns and swallows his steak. “There’s no way we’ll all fit in our tub, Lin. You and I didn’t fit and Teddy’s a big guy.”

Linda frowns right back at her husband. “We can make it work, Bob.” Suddenly Linda’s eyes widen behind her bright red glasses. “Oh, we could take turns!”

“What, one of us would just sit on the toilet, handing out towels or something?” Bob chuckles and Teddy grins himself.

“Well, what do you suggest, Mr. Date Night Expert?” Linda huffs and sits back down with a thud. She shoves a huge bite of fish in her mouth, grumbling.

“Here’s an idea,” Bob says gently. “We finish up here and get dessert to go. We go home, get into our night clothes, and watch a movie. Something fancy like, I dunno, one of those rom-coms you guys like.”

“Oh yeah! There’s a new one out Louise downloaded for me!” Teddy interrupts, excited. “It takes place in the same time period as “Winthrop Manor’!”

“OK, then that one. ‘Winthrop Manor’ is fancy. Right, Lin?” Bob asks his wife.

Linda smiles a little. “Yeah, it’s the fanciest show I know.”

“We eat dessert, maybe drink some more wine. We don’t do a bubble bath because we’ll make a huge mess,” Bob powers through Linda’s grunts, “but we can light our candles and maybe try massages or something. Those are fancy, I think.”

Teddy’s blush comes back with a vengeance.

Linda’s smile becomes a saucy smirk. “That sounds great, Bobby.” She turns to Teddy, who is too busy imagining certain scenes to notice at first. “What do you think, Ted? Teddy!”

“Huh, what?” Teddy sputters before remembering where he is. “Oh, yeah! That sounds great! Really great!” Teddy wants to keep rambling. To tell Bob and Linda how much he loves them and how much he appreciates them and how much it means that they would go to this much trouble for him.

Instead he just grins wide enough that his cheeks hurt.

“And after massages, it’s sex time!” Linda winks over at Teddy and he seriously might pass out. Hopefully he doesn’t have a heart attack before they get home.

Bob blushes, coughs, and looks around, probably to make sure that no one heard Linda. They’re still trying to be discreet–sort of. Then he leans in to whisper. “Yeah, then that.”

“All right!” Linda exclaims, startling Bob and Teddy both. “Let’s get this fancy date night really rocking! Eat faster, you guys! Come on, eat like you're on starvation rations!”

Bob and Teddy laugh even as they try to keep pace with Linda. Teddy is already imagining cuddling on the couch, their candles burning on the living room table and filling the air with a mid-tier candle company’s idea of sea scents. Plus everything else…

Teddy eats his chicken as fast as he can. The little row of candles sparkle in their glass holders as the one lit candle sends out its shine. Teddy feels warm all over–like maybe he’s lit from within.