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Chapter Text

After the war, Snape disappeared. When his body was never found, there were rumors he was dead, but just as many that he’d survived and slinked off into oblivion. 

He’d spent the first six months recovering alone in a safe house, battling both for his life and his will to live. A year later he found out a distant Muggle relative had died leaving him as the sole heir to a fortune, a title, and an enormous manor on a large plot of land in the north, far away from everything and everyone he knew. He had gladly taken the new identity and was happy to live his life as a recluse, spending his days cultivating his beautiful gardens and brewing to his heart’s content in the potions lab he’d built for himself in the dungeons. 

Snape was busy in his lab when his house elf appeared suddenly before him. 

“I thought I told you never to disturb me when I’m brewing.” His words were curt, but not cruel, although he hated to be interrupted when he was deep in concentration.

“Sorry, sir” the house elf trembled slightly, wringing his hands. “I’s didn’t want to disturb you, but, but…” he stuttered. 

“Well, get on with it,” Snape spat, now clearly irritated. 

“Someone is here to see you, sir.” The house elf backed away cautiously, looking up from his brow not wanting to see the rage in his master’s face. While Snape would never harm his elf, he occasionally had an ugly temper and Tinny tried to avoid upsetting him.

“Someone, who?” He replied flatly as he carefully ground dried rosemary between his fingers over a simmering black cauldron. “And how?” He had strong apparition wards around the manor, and a working floo, which he generally kept off the network unless he needed something. 

“I’s not sure, my Lord, he said he’s from the Ministry. That he knows you, from before.”

Snape angrily banished the potion he’d been working on and turned on his heels, moving briskly up the stairs to the main floor, his black robes sweeping behind him. In six years no one had dared to show up uninvited to his home, and he was dying to know who had the audacity to do so now. 

He stalked through the parlor ready to hex someone into oblivion and was shocked to see Harry bloody Potter waiting casually by the fireplace. He was older, more mature, a bit of healthy weight on him, but lines already beginning to form prematurely on his face. Snape could see the war still plagued him, he knew those lines and those dark circles, he’d bet his life Harry suffered from nightmares and panic attacks but still pretended that everything was just fine.

“Professor Snape, you’re looking well, sir.” He put out a hand to greet the older wizard but soon put it away as he was met with a sneer. 

“Snape is dead. I’m Lord Alastair Kent now. And what on earth are you doing here? How did you find me?”

A smile crept over the young man’s face, not at the words, but at seeing his professor again, his words as cutting as ever. “I’m sorry to have come unannounced, but I’m afraid it’s rather urgent. I came myself in order to protect your new whereabouts and identity.”

The scowl on Snape’s face deepened. “I’m a busy man, Potter, so say whatever you need to say and be on your way.”

For the last six years, Snape had avoided the wizarding world as much as possible. He’d occasionally disguise himself and go into town briefly for supplies and potions ingredients, and he’d kept up with enough wizarding news to know that Harry Potter had reached his goal of becoming an Auror and was now working his way up the Ministry ladder, probably only a few years away from being Minister of Magic. 

He also knew it was Potter who had cleared his name and had an Order of Merlin bestowed on him “posthumously.” But he wasn’t about to thank him for any of that- he just wanted to be left alone and live in peace, riding out his later years in solitude and intellectual exercise while the wizarding world believed him dead and long-forgotten.

“Perhaps we should take a seat, this may take a moment.” Harry gestured to the sofa. 

Snape crossed his arms over his chest and stared down at Potter menacingly. “Presumptuous of you to believe you’ve been invited to stay. Kindly state your business and leave, I have no interest in social visits.”

“I’m afraid this isn’t a social visit, Professor.” Harry ran a hand through his unruly mop of dark hair before he exhaled and steeled himself.  “Stella Blackburn has died, I’m afraid. From the most recent strain of Dragon Pox. She apparently tried to treat it on her own at home instead of seeking out a healer, and tragically, she miscalculated in some of her potions and spellwork. It was a gruesome end.”

Snape hadn’t thought about that woman in years. He’d never been one for romance, but during a particularly rough period leading up to the war, he’d had a fleeting dalliance with her after a few too many drinks in Diagon Alley. They’d hooked up a few times after that, but it was nothing serious, he could barely remember it except for the fact it was the last time he’d been with a woman. At the time he’d been bored, filled with impending doom, and she was a willing young witch who didn’t talk too much or ask too many questions—a perfect distraction from the imminent return of the Dark Lord, or so he believed at the time. She had disappeared a few months later and with everything going on, he’d never given it—or her—a second thought. Until now.

Idiot woman , he thought to himself, she had been pleasant—with a great arse—but not nearly bright enough to brew her own healing potions. He’d never asked her about her background, but it was quite obvious to him that she’d never been to Hogwarts or had a proper magical education. She should have gone to St. Mungos if she’d had half a brain. Snape shook his head and exhaled with mild annoyance. “I fail to see how that’s any of my concern.”

Harry gestured again to the sofa. “Please, Professor, let’s sit for a moment.”

“I see you’re still as dim-witted as you’ve always been, Potter. How many times do I have to tell you, I’m not your Professor. You may address me properly or you may leave. I’m growing quite weary of your presence here.”

The young man cleared his throat. “I’m sorry, sir. I don’t know how to tell you this, but are you aware that you have a son?”

Snape felt like the floor was dropping out beneath him, his stomach now wrenching into his feet, but he kept his face impassive. A delayed and telling beat passed before he finally responded. “Don’t be absurd.”

“Yes, sir. I’m afraid you do. His name is Soren, he’s seven. And you’re his only living relative.”

With a snap of his fingers, Snape’s house elf appeared. “Tinny, bring us some firewhiskey.” The elf nodded and disappeared quickly. 

Snape finally sat down in an armchair, trying to remain composed. “His mother was hardly discerning, anyone could be the father. I refuse to take responsibility for some common street urchin just because his fool of a mother wasn’t bright enough to seek proper medical care.” 

Tinny returned quickly with two glasses of firewhisky on a tray, handing one to Snape and one to Harry. 

Harry thanked the house elf and sat cautiously on the sofa, setting his glass down untouched on the coffee table. “The boy was just discovered by Muggle social services. He’d been living alone in the house with his mother’s rotting body for weeks. He was half-starved when the neighbors finally called about the stench. It was a whole production with the Ministry when we discovered that he and his mother were magical. It took days to sort out the Muggle authorities and repair all of their memories. But Stella, she left a note and a will before she died, naming you as the father.”

After taking a long sip of his whiskey, Snape brought the glass down rather harshly on his side table. “There must be someone else who can take the boy. Whilst I seriously doubt I’m the father, as you well know I’m not suited to nor interested in raising a child. Why not leave him in care with the muggles? Surely they could put him in a children’s home or with a foster family.”

“Sir, really, he’s quite an exceptional boy. He’s very bright and already showing signs of powerful magic, it is out of the question to leave him with muggles. He’s quite aware of his magic, his mother was obviously teaching him at home.”

Snape scoffed. “She was barely more than a squib, I seriously doubt he’s as capable as he is reckless and disappointingly unaware of his limitations. It’s probably best that you Obliviate him and leave him with social services. I have no time to look after orphaned brats, I think I’ve done enough of that for one lifetime.” He raised an eyebrow at Harry hoping he caught the hint. 

“Please, sir. He has no one else to look after him.”

“Absolutely not my problem.” Snape swigged the rest of his whiskey and slammed down his empty glass before standing. “You’ve delivered your message, you may leave.”

Unintimidated, Harry merely reached for his wand. “We can settle this quickly with a paternity potion. If I may, sir, take a sample, and then I’ll be on my way.”

Confident that there was no possible way he was the father, Snape pulled up his right sleeve, offering the smooth, white skin on his unmarked forearm. “If that’s what it takes to finally be rid of you. Go on, be quick about it. And do try your best not to stuff this up, Potter. It’s my good arm.”

Harry aimed his wand and a small drop of blood appeared on the pale skin. He pulled a vial from his pocket and collected the oozing red liquid before touching his wand to Snape’s arm to heal the small wound. 

While the two men watched, the vial began to bubble and fizz before it finally turned a luminescent gold. 

Harry pursed his lips together to suppress a small gasp while the color drained completely from Snape’s face, leaving him a more ghostly pallor than usual. 

The potion confirmed it; Snape was indeed the father.

Snape collapsed back into his armchair in disbelief and horror, a hand shooting to rub his forehead. 

Several slow seconds passed before Harry finally spoke up, softening his voice to just above a whisper. “Sir, please.”

“I don’t want him, Potter. Surely I can sign away my parental rights. For Merlin’s sake, I’m technically dead to the Wizarding World. How did you even find me? There’s a reason I disappeared- haven’t I given enough? Don’t I deserve to have my own life now? TINNY!”

The small house elf appeared again and Snape just tapped the rim of his glass while Tinny raced to refill it with whiskey.

“I understand, Professor, it’s just—”

A hand slammed down hard on the leather armrest. “It’s Lord Kent, you imbecile. Professor Snape is dead. Gone. Did the War leave you brain damaged? How many times must I tell you?”

“I’m sorry sir…Lord Kent. The Ministry…well, mostly me and a small handful of others…have known where you were this whole time, but out of respect for your privacy and all you’ve given to the wizarding community, it’s remained a tightly held secret. But this boy has nowhere else to go. I’m afraid there’s no choice. I’m sorry, sir, but he needs you.”

Snape took another long sip of his whiskey but he knew he would need much more than that to deal with all this. 

“I wanted to come and speak to you first, but the boy is waiting. I’m sure you need a bit of time to prepare, so I will return with him tomorrow afternoon. I’m sorry, there’s no other option.”

Without looking up, Snape pointed to the floo. “Leave me. Get out.”

Harry stood to leave, addressing the crumpled man in the armchair confidently as he passed by. “I know this isn’t what you envisioned for your life now, but this boy deserves to have a father. We both know how it feels to be unloved and unwanted, so I hope you can find a way to give him something better than that. He didn’t ask for this.”

Snape finished his second glass without looking up and as soon as he heard the floo roar with Harry’s exit, he hurled his glass at the hearth, letting out a primal scream of rage as the crystal shattered against the stone. 

He closed his eyes and leaned back in his chair trying to figure out what he was possibly going to do. 

The next morning, Snape awoke in his armchair, his mouth dry and crusted with a nasty film after having spent the night pounding firewhiskey in between fits of anger and frustration. He knew Potter was right, that there was no choice, but it felt supremely unfair. Like the universe had conspired against him once again, like he would never ever have peace or solitude or his own life ever again. 

He summoned a hangover potion and chugged it before dragging himself to the washroom to bathe and rid himself of the stench of a mindless night of binge drinking. 

Thankfully the potion kicked in as the hot water streamed over him and he closed his eyes and breathed in the steam, his wet hair sticking to his face and the nape of his neck. When the water began to run cold he turned it off and wandlessly dried himself before wrapping himself in a warm dressing gown. 

After finishing his morning tea and forcing down some dry toast, he pulled himself together and began to tidy and make a few preparations. His manor house wasn’t egregiously large, but it had more than enough space. He generally inhabited the main floor and the East wing upstairs, and of course the dungeons downstairs where he kept his vast potions lab and a few other rooms he used for storing supplies, keeping sacred books and practicing spells. 

He had a massive library on the main floor where he enjoyed taking tea and reading, but all of his really special books, his own manuscripts, and some of the more forbidden texts on dark magic he kept in his private collection in the dungeons. He also had a beautiful study upstairs where he kept the books he read most frequently, and where he would do most of his writing. Since he rarely spoke to anyone other than Tinny, he’d taken up writing in a journal, and it had become a sacred ritual for him in the years since the war. 

Snape walked up the stairs and with a wave of his arm, illuminated all of the candles, sconces, and chandeliers in the West wing of the upstairs. He hadn’t stepped foot there in years and the neglect showed; spider webs, dust, threadbare rugs and tapestries with moth holes. All of it the remnants of long-dead muggle ancestors he’d never known but nonetheless inherited from.

He figured he’d have to set up a bedroom for the boy, but what else? At 7 years old he was too old for a nursery, but he would need a place to do his studies and keep his books and toys—not that he would be spoiled with too many of them. Even if Snape had plenty of money now, he refused to raise a spoiled little rich boy. His mind went immediately to Draco Malfoy and some of the overindulged pure bloods he’d had to put up with in his years as Slytherin Head of House. He shook his head. No, he would definitely not spoil the boy, he couldn’t think of a greater disservice. 

The one thing Snape knew for sure was that he would have to get a governess as soon as possible. He would do his fatherly duties and provide for the boy materially, make sure he was fed and clothed and well-looked after, but he didn’t have the time, energy, or intention of being a primary caretaker. He would have to find someone as soon as possible who could come and care for the boy and take charge of his studies until he was old enough to go to Hogwarts. 

With that in mind, he would prepare a second bedroom for a woman. Hopefully he’d be able to find someone within the week so he didn’t have to waste any time getting back to his own work. He would put a classified ad in the Daily Prophet this afternoon, there was no time to waste. 

Over the next several hours, Snape—with the help of Tinny—prepared the West wing to house a child and a governess. He kept the boy’s bedroom fairly simple, modeling it somewhat after the Slytherin dorm rooms with a big four-poster bed, green thick curtains and new drapes over the windows. 

The room was left fairly sparse except for a bookcase, a wardrobe, a chest of drawers and a desk, all made of dark cherry. He had no idea what else the boy would need, but hopefully he would bring everything with him. It wasn’t cheery or child-like, but it was functional, just the way Snape liked it. 

He rearranged a large room as the makeshift schoolroom/playroom, although Snape detested the idea of idle play. While he imagined the boy would learn the basics of muggle education, he also made sure it was set-up in a way that he could begin with magical studies as well. He conjured a small lab bench for potions and herbology. No son of his would show up at Hogwarts unprepared, he expected him to excel in all of his courses, but Potions especially.

When he was satisfied with the set-up, which looked rather like a classroom at Hogwarts, he went about preparing a room for the governess. He kept it simple, hoping whatever witch he brought in would be capable enough to make any additions or changes herself. He made sure there was a large washroom attached with a beautiful vanity and a large tub. He’d prefer not to have to go through the bother of looking for a governess a second time, so he wanted to make sure it was comfortable and inviting enough, that coupled with an excellent salary, she wouldn’t want to leave. 

Having accidentally caught a glimpse of himself in the large wall mirror, he scowled at his reflection- he looked sallow and thin, the hangover potion doing nothing to remove the dark circles from under his eyes. He quickly turned to leave. 

Satisfied with his progress, he retreated downstairs to the parlor and had Tinny fix him a pot of Earl Grey while he sat at his small writing desk and composed his ad for the Daily Prophet:

Seeking Governess for Immediate Placement. 

In search of a qualified witch to care for and privately tutor a 7-year-old boy. Must have stellar academic credentials, including OWLS and NEWTS in at least 5 core subjects, including Potions. Proficiency with muggle coursework including English, maths, basic science, and geography, preferably with ability to teach Latin. 

Position is live-in with room and board provided along with a generous salary. Excellent references required, priority given to those who can start immediately. To apply, please send an owl with cover letter, qualifications, and references addressed to:

Lord Kent, Ashbury Manor

He sealed up the letter and called out to Tinny. With a small pop, she appeared in front of him. 

“Post this immediately to the Daily Prophet. Use that tawny owl, Carl, he’s usually the fastest.”

Tinny took the letter and nodded. “Yes, sir. Anything else?”

“Prepare a proper tea with sandwiches and scones, we’re expecting guests shortly.” The words churned his stomach.

Unsure of what to do with his nervous energy, Snape got up from his desk and paced for a bit in the parlor. He stared out one of the large windows onto his vast grounds and let out a deep sigh. He hoped and prayed he would find a governess quickly so he could return to his life of solitude. He dreaded the peace and tranquility he’d come to rely on being gone forever. He tried to remind himself that it was only for a few years and then hopefully the brat would go off to Hogwarts and he’d have his quiet life back again. 

After another half-hour of pacing and staring out the window, he finally sat down in his chair to wait. He looked up at the clock on the mantle and listened to it tick, the seconds passing by excruciatingly slowly.

Finally, at ten past 3pm, the floo roared to life and Harry Potter came through with a small, dark-haired boy in tow. 

The boy looked sullen, his eyes downcast and his face thin as Harry dragged him by the hand. “Come along, Soren.”

Harry looked up and smiled. “Sir, this is Soren…Soren, can you say hello?” He nudged the little boy gently with a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

Snape just stared down at the tiny human, attempting to keep a scowl from forming on his hardened face. When Soren refused to look up or offer a hand, Snape lashed out coldly. “Are you deaf or just impertinent? It is unabashedly rude to enter someone’s home without greeting them properly. Get your eyes off the floor and present yourself this instant.”

The timid boy took a step closer to Harry, whose smile had disappeared completely now and was replaced with disapproval at the older man’s harsh words. He looked Snape straight in the eye, “Honestly Prof—Lord Kent, he’s nervous and frightened. He’s been through a lot in the last few days.” 

Harry kneeled down next to Soren and put a reassuring hand on his back. “Soren, this is your father, Lord Alastair Kent. There’s nothing to be frightened of, can you look up and shake his hand?”

Soren shook his head and a small tear dripped down his cheek before he turned into Harry’s shoulder seeking comfort.

Snape couldn’t help himself, he rolled his eyes. This pathetic sniveling child was supposedly his offspring? He was already irritated and it hadn’t even been five minutes. 

“Enough theatrics, you’re seven years-old, not two. Now stand up straight, put your head up and say hello. Your mother might have babied you, but I will not. Now come here and greet me like a proper young man.” Snape clicked his fingers and pointed to a spot right in front of him.

Harry gave the boy a quick cuddle and then pulled him off of him, quietly encouraging him toward Snape. “Go on, say hello.”

Finally, Soren shuffled forward and offered his hand to Snape, still refusing to look up. In a voice barely above a whisper he eked out a small “Hello.”

Snape reached down and roughly adjusted his shoulders so he was standing up straight before putting a hand under his chin and tilting his head up. “Have the respect to look at me when you’re speaking to me. Try again. ‘It’s a pleasure to meet you, sir.’”

Soren looked up at the tall, intimidating man and repeated his words so softly they were barely audible. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, sir.” His eyes immediately fell back to the floor as he put his hands into his pockets and stepped backward.

Snape dropped his hand from the boy’s face in disgust. “Pathetic. It’s clear your upbringing thus far has been less than adequate, so we have a lot to remedy. I will not tolerate any nonsense moving forward, so I suggest you learn to behave yourself quickly. Now sit down and stay quiet unless you are spoken to.”

Relieved to no longer be the object of Snape’s attention, the little boy scurried to the sofa where he sat down in the corner furthest away, his hands folded on his lap and his eyes still downcast and filled with tears. 

“He’s only seven, sir, you might consider being a bit more understanding. He’s just lost the only parent he’s ever known and he’s terrified. Perhaps you can make an effort to show him a little bit of warmth.”

Snape scoffed. “You’ve obviously forgotten to whom you are speaking, Potter. I have never wanted nor enjoyed being around children. I will look after him and ensure his needs are met, but I will not coddle him. He will need to adapt, I don’t have the time or patience for his attention-seeking displays.”

Harry let out a deep sigh and shook his head. “Please, sir. Just remember he’s only a child.”

“I’ve spent enough time around children to know they’re perfectly capable of learning how to act respectfully. If he knows what’s good for him, he’ll learn it quickly. I won’t have a rude or disrespectful child running around in my home. Now, sit down, Potter. But if you insist on telling me how to parent him, perhaps you’d like to take him home and do it yourself?”

“I wish I could, sir, but the Wizarding laws are clear, he’s your son and your responsibility.”

“Very well, then I will parent him as I see fit and you will cease with your unsolicited drivel.” With that, Snape sat down in his armchair and snapped for his house elf. “Tinny, bring us the tea service.”

Soren’s eyes grew large when he saw the small house elf appear out of thin air, carrying a rather large tea service including a tiered set of plates with sandwiches, biscuits, scones and bits of cake. 

“What’s that?” Soren exclaimed, pointing at Tinny and looking at Harry for an explanation. 

Before Harry could answer gently, Snape snapped back. “Put your hand down you silly boy, it’s rude to point. That is Tinny, our house elf. He helps out around the manor.”

Snape stared for a moment at Soren’s face, seeing pieces of himself in the young boy for the first time. His hair was black and straight, his face oval-shaped with thin lips. His eyes were dark but a bit rounder and larger than Snape’s own, framed with long thick eye-lashes. His nose, while not small and button-like, was thankfully less-pronounced than his own. It was proportional. But he looked sickly and frail, underweight and vitamin-deficient, dark bags under his eyes that looked out of place on a face so young. 

“You may help yourself to tea and sandwiches,” Snape said, in maybe the most gentle tone he’d used so far. “But no more than one piece of cake. The last thing I need today is a child hyped up on sugar irritating me for the rest of the afternoon.”

Soren waited a moment and made himself a small plate while Tinny poured him a cup of tea with milk and sugar.

When Snape was reassured he was following directions, he turned his eyes to Harry. “I assume you’ve brought his things? I’ve set up a bedroom upstairs for him and advertised for a governess I hope will begin shortly.”

“He didn’t have much, to be fair. I think his mum was struggling a bit. We packed up what we could find, but it’s not much. I was able to get a few more clothes from social services, but you’ll probably need to get him some things. Ginny packed up a few toys and books for him, but it’s not a lot.”

Snape let out an exasperated sigh. “How convenient…Tinny, take Soren’s things from Mr. Potter and leave them in his room. He can put them away when we’ve finished tea.”

“Yes, sir,” Tinny said eagerly, waiting patiently as Harry pulled out a few shrunken times from his pocket and handed them over. 

The three of them sat awkwardly for several minutes, drinking tea and eating finger sandwiches quietly before Harry finally spoke up. 

“Soren, I know this has been a big change for you, but you’ll settle in. Ginny and I will come back and check on you in a few days and make sure you’re settling in.”

“Pardon?” Snape said, incredulously. “I see you’re as brazen as ever, Potter. I despise unannounced guests so perhaps you might have the decency to owl me the next time you decide you want to drop in without invitation.”

Harry had to suppress a small smile, he’d forgotten how surly his old Professor could really be. “Of course, sir, my apologies. I will request an invitation next time, but Ginny and I would still like to check in on Soren from time to time if we could.”

“We’ll see. If I agree, it will be at my convenience, not yours.” 

Harry turned his attention back to the little boy. “But you can send me a letter any time, Soren. I think you’ll soon settle in here and hopefully you’ll be very happy.” 

He smiled at the boy while he spoke and he really hoped it was true. If he had to be honest, he was worried about leaving him with Snape. Not that he doubted the older wizard was capable of looking after him, but he also knew the man was rigid and cold and while mostly fair and very protective, he gave little praise, almost no comfort, and could be a stern disciplinarian. Perhaps not the best match for a vulnerable and timid 7 year-old who’d recently lost his mother. 

When Harry finished his tea, he walked over to Soren. The boy got off the couch and he leaned down to give him a long hug while whispering in his ear. “He can be a bit grumpy, but he’s a good, honorable man. Just make sure you listen to him and behave yourself, OK? I’ll check on you soon.”

Soren hugged Harry and didn’t want to let go, pleading with him quietly. “Please don’t leave me. I want to come with you.”

“Sorry kiddo, but you need to stay here with your father.” Harry tried to stand up but Soren jumped on him and started sobbing. 

“I don’t want to stay here! He’s mean, I want to come with you!” The boy wailed loudly with his whole heart, pleading not to be left. “Please, please!!”

Harry awkwardly tried to put the boy down. “It’s going to be OK, Soren, I promise.”

“No!!! Take me with you!”

Soren was in a full-blown meltdown, sobbing and scrambling to keep hold of Harry who felt terrible leaving him. He was gagging on his own cries, the deep sorrow echoing in his chest. 

“I’m sorry Soren, I can’t take you with me. But you’ll be OK here, I promise.” Harry could feel his heart wrenching but he knew he had no choice, he had to leave the boy. He looked up at Snape who was staring at both of them, his arms held tightly behind his back and his face marked with its usual mix of boredom and disapproval. 

Finally, refusing to see things escalate further, Snape intervened. He walked forward and grabbed Soren’s hands away from where he was desperately grabbing onto Harry’s clothes. 

“Enough! Let go of Mr. Potter this instant, and get control of yourself.” Snape kept his voice stern, but he was obviously making a great effort not to escalate things.

Soren just screamed louder as he attempted to collapse onto the floor, Snape still holding onto his arms. “No!! I don’t want to stay here! I hate you!”

Harry straightened his shirt and readjusted his glasses, looking down sympathetically at the boy. 

“Leave now, Mr. Potter, while you can. I am perfectly capable of dealing with an over emotional child. I spent fifteen years doing it for a living. He’ll survive.” 

Snape’s words were surprisingly even given the screaming child writhing in his grasp. 

“Are you sure you’re OK?” Harry asked, unsure if he should leave the boy in this condition. “I can stay for a bit.”

Snape merely raised an eyebrow and tilted his head with a look of indignation. “Really, Potter? Go on, your presence here is only making this more difficult. You may use the floo.”

Soren screamed out again as he tried to jerk out of Snape’s grasp. “No!!! I don’t want to stay here! Don’t make me stay here!” He kicked backward at Snape’s shin in an effort to escape but the older man quickly dodged him, ignoring the hysterics as Harry walked toward the floo.

“I’ll see you in a few days, Soren.” He smiled at the boy as he threw the shimmering powder into the fire and disappeared, a reluctant look on his face as he spun into the green flames.

Seeing his only hope at escape slip through the floo, Soren collapsed fully onto the floor in a boneless heap, no longer fighting, just sobbing.

Snape let go of his arms and allowed him to cry it out for several minutes on the ground before he finally spoke. “That’s quite enough. I’ve allowed you to have your little tantrum, now it’s time to get off the floor and compose yourself. I refuse to indulge you any longer.”

The loud wailing had stopped but Soren was still balled up on the rug crying quietly into his arms, rocking back and forth and refusing to move or acknowledge Snape in any way. 

“I mean it. That’s enough. If you want to cry, you may do so in your room, I’ve had quite enough of your hysterics for the day.”

Again, Snape’s words were met with silence as the boy stayed with his head down, buried in his arms on the ancient Persian carpet, rhythmically moving back and forth in a vain attempt to soothe himself.

It was taking all of his willpower not to lash out at the boy, but he was making an effort not to be cruel. However, his patience was reaching its limit. “Soren, you will obey me right now. If you do not get up from the floor this instant, you will not like what happens next. Get. Up.”

The tone in Snape’s voice had changed and Soren could tell he was playing with fire, but he felt so powerless over his situation that he dug his heels in and refused to comply, perhaps exerting his only sense of control by ignoring the older wizard.

“Very well, since you’re unable to follow instructions, you will spend the rest of the afternoon in your room. And if I hear any further cheek or disrespect, you will do so with a sore backside. Now that’s enough.” 

Snape bent down and effortlessly lifted the boy to his feet. He grabbed a hold of his wrist and took several long strides toward the staircase. To his surprise, Soren didn’t fight him, shuffling along behind him, leaning his head back with his eyes closed and still crying audibly.

When they got to the West wing, Snape once again waved his wand and lit the sconces illuminating the corridor, not stopping until he reached the little boy’s door on the right. He pulled Soren into the middle of the room, turned to face him and bent down slightly to speak to him. 

“You will unpack your things and stay in your room. Quietly. I will come and fetch you when it’s time for supper, by which time I hope you will have your emotions under better control. If you cannot get yourself together by then, just know I will not have a single moment of hesitation in putting you over my knee and sending you off to bed for the rest of the night. Test me at your own peril.”

Soren choked out a small sob and pulled his arm away from Snape, walking toward one of the bags Tinny had enlarged and left on the floor in front of his bed. He rummaged for a moment before he found what he was looking for, a worn-looking rabbit that he held to his face before hugging to his chest. 

Snape was tempted to scold him for so rudely walking away without responding, but he honestly didn’t have the energy to deal with him anymore. The years of solitude had done little to extend his patience in general, much less with a small, overly emotional child.

“Unpack your room before supper. You do not have permission to leave here before then, do you understand?”

Soren nodded his head and walked to the bed where he curled up on his side, clutching his rabbit and sobbing into its well-loved fur. 

With a roll of his eyes, Snape closed the door and left the boy to cry it out on his own. Is it too early for a firewhiskey? He thought to himself as he made his way back to the parlor, his nerves completely shot and any expectation for a calm transition promptly destroyed. 

At 6:30pm, Snape returned to Soren’s room to let him know it was time for supper. He normally ate much later, but his goal was to get the boy bathed and in bed at a reasonable hour so he could enjoy the evening to himself. 

He opened the door to find Soren, still laying on the bed, staring at the wall with his rabbit in a death-grip. 

A quick glance around the room and he could see the boy had at least attempted to unpack his meager possessions. 

“I see you’ve followed my instructions. Very wise. Now if you’ve calmed down enough, you may come down for dinner.”

“Not hungry.” Soren mumbled without looking up from the wall. 

“I thought I made it clear that we’ve had enough theatrics for one day. You’ve sulked the entire afternoon, so now you will stop acting like a toddler and come down and eat. You’re thin and malnourished, I will not allow you to starve under my roof.”

“Go away. Leave me alone.”

Snape could feel the anger rise up in him as he stalked toward the bed. He was tempted to teach the boy a lesson in manners, but he took a deep breath to calm himself. He stood over the bed while he composed himself. “Turn around and look at me.”

Several long seconds went by before Snape hardened his voice. “Turn. Around. Right. Now.”

Soren finally rolled over toward Snape, his face smooshed into his stuffed rabbit.

Once again Snape took the boy’s chin between his finger and thumb, drawing his eyes upward. In a calm but firm voice he continued. “You will do well not to speak to me like that again. I am being exceptionally lenient with you today because I understand you have been through a lot. But I will not tolerate any further disrespect from you. This is the last of my forbearance. Do you understand?”

Soren stared into the deep black eyes and attempted to nod his head. 

“ Yes, sir ” Snape guided, harshly. 

“Yes, sir,” Soren responded in a whisper. 

Releasing his chin, he gave a small nod of his head. “Very well. I will send Tinny up with some food. But this is your only reprieve. Tomorrow you will eat your meals in the dining room. Any further dramatics or refusal to do so and there will be unpleasant consequences. I suggest you heed my warnings. Am I clear?”

Once again Soren nodded his head. 

“Pardon?” Snape raised an eyebrow and gave him a dangerous look.

“Yes, sir.”

“Lights are out at 8:00pm. You are not to leave your room until morning.”

With that pronouncement, Snape turned dramatically to leave, somewhat relieved to be able to dine alone in peace, although his mind was never far from the strange boy upstairs. His son . Even thinking the word left a bitter taste in his mouth. 

As soon as he sat down at the table, he sent Tinny upstairs with a plate full of food. 

At 8pm, he cast a spell to put out the lights, leaving only a few candles in the hallway. He was tempted to go and check on the boy to make sure he was in bed, but instead he sent Tinny while he sat alone in his study sipping on a nice tawny port as he sat down at his desk to write.

Try as he might, he couldn’t focus on a thing. He dreaded waking up to a full day alone with the boy tomorrow. 

After a restless night of sleep, Snape awoke feeling drained and despondent. He showered and dressed and sat for a while in his parlor sipping tea before breakfast. 

When the Daily Prophet arrived through his floo, he immediately searched for his classified ad. Satisfied it was there (and details printed properly), he said a silent prayer that he would find someone soon. 

At quarter past 8, he rose and headed toward the stairs, letting out a deep breath before he opened the door to Soren’s room. 

The boy was still in his pyjamas, but laying awake, staring at the wall and holding his bunny. 

“We will have breakfast in the dining room in fifteen minutes. Wash your face and change into proper clothes before you come downstairs.”

Once again, Soren ignored him and just stared at the wall. 

“You will look at me and respond with a verbal answer. I refuse to play this petulant little game with you another day. This is your last warning.”

Snape really didn’t want to resort to threats, which in his experience worked rather well, but he couldn’t continue to let the boy act this way. 

To his surprise, Soren pushed himself up to a sitting position, looked at him directly in the eyes and responded quietly. “Yes, sir.”

With a short nod of his head, Snape replied. “Good. Then I will see you at the table shortly.”

When the boy arrived downstairs a few minutes later, Snape was quietly impressed. He had combed his hair and washed his face and had managed to dress himself. 

“You may sit there.” Snape pointed to a chair on his left and Soren scrambled into it, looking down at his empty plate awaiting further instruction. 

Snape tapped the table and several platters of food appeared. Fresh fruits, eggs, bacon, toast. He had asked Tinny to prepare a few more options than normal this morning. He didn’t generally eat a large breakfast, but he wanted to make sure the boy ate, he was positively sickly. 

“You may take as much as you like, but eat what you take. I detest wastefulness.”

The two continued their meal in silence, Snape watching the boy carefully over the rim of his teacup. He ate very little, picking at small portions of food and refusing to look up or engage with Snape in any way. When his plate was mostly empty, he put his hands back in his lap and stayed quiet. 

“You barely ate. You should have some more eggs or perhaps a bit more fruit,” Snape suggested, concerned the boy was going to waste away to nothing. 

“I’m not hungry,” Soren whispered quietly. 

“ Sir. I’m not hungry, SIR. ” Snape repeated, reminding the boy how demanded to be addressed. 

“I’m not hungry, sir ,” the boy repeated, still in a whisper but with the tiniest hint of quiet rage.

“Why? Are you ill?”

The boy shook his head. “No…” he paused for a moment and several tears dropped onto the table and he ran an arm across his eyes. “I miss my mummy.” Then he heaved a deep sob and pushed away from the table, running back toward the stairs to his room. 

Snape was left in stunned silence. He was slightly irritated that the boy had left the table without asking to be excused, but he wasn’t entirely unfeeling. Nonetheless,  comforting small children wasn’t exactly his forte. 

Not knowing what else to do, he finished his breakfast and retreated to his parlor where he continued to sip on his tea while he worried quietly about how to handle things. 

Chapter Text

As the morning wore on, Snape began receiving letters in response to his ad. He had never been so grateful to see the owls at his window. 

One by one, he reviewed them, unimpressed and growing more annoyed by the minute. He’d open them, read them, disapprove, and toss them into the fireplace. Honestly- how hard could it be? 

An exasperated sigh escaped his lips before he called for Tinny. “Please tell Soren to come downstairs, I wish to speak with him.”

Tinny disappeared and five minutes later, Soren slinked downstairs, his face still red and tear-stained. 

Snape hated to admit he had been bothered, deeply, the entire morning. Although he still didn’t feel “fatherly”- he couldn’t help but feel genuinely bad for the boy’s obvious pain. It nagged him, but he didn’t know what to do. And ultimately the boy would need to get over it. He wasn’t exactly thrilled with the situation either, but he wasn’t complaining about it. 

At Hogwarts he’d always made sure he chose his prefects wisely and he put most of the coddling and emotional work onto them. Homesickness, dying grandparents, boyfriend/girlfriend problems, tummy aches— he let his prefects handle it, doling out an occasional pat on the shoulder if he was feeling generous. As the Slytherin Head of House, he saw himself as the disciplinarian, the stern father there to scare the little brats into following the rules and meting out swift justice if they did not. The hand-holding, the hugs, the coddling— all that was best left to his prefects and Madame Pomfrey. 

But this felt different. This boy had no one else. And as he reminded himself, painfully, he was the boy’s father and all he had left in the world. God how he regretted those few fleeting encounters now. It hadn’t even been that enjoyable at the time, he was just bored, drunk, and in need of escape, never considering for a moment that if he wasn’t careful, it might result in a child. To be honest, he never believed he’d survive in the first place, so imagining himself years in the future taking care of a sullen little boy was the last thing he’d ever dream up. It was an utter nightmare. 

Snape made an attempt to soften his voice as he spoke to Soren. He sat in his usual armchair, and called him over, pointing to a spot right in front of him. “Come here. I wish to speak with you.”

Soren obeyed silently, standing as far away as he could manage without being outright defiant. 

“I’m sorry for your loss and everything you’ve been through. Your mother was a kind and caring woman, I’m sure she was an excellent mother.”

The little boy put his head into his hands and began to cry. 

With a silent flick of his wrist, Snape conjured a handkerchief and handed it to the boy. “Don’t be disgusting. Use this, not your hands.”

He took a deep breath before he continued. “I know this is a very difficult change, for both of us, but we will manage. You will have everything you need to live a comfortable life and when you come of age, I will ensure you’ve had a proper education and means to a life without struggle.”

Soren wiped at his face with the handkerchief, his breath still catching. Although Snape meant his words to be reassuring, they meant nothing to a 7 year-old boy who had just lost his mum. He needed love and comfort, and it didn’t sound like that was part of the package. 

Not knowing what else to do or say, Snape put a hand on his head and patted him awkwardly. Soren froze at the touch and Snape dropped his hand, ending whatever sad attempt at affection he was trying to manage. 

“Now then, I would like to talk to you about what to expect moving forward. I am in the process of finding you a governess whom I hope will begin shortly. After that your days will be filled with school work and magical preparation. You’re still quite young to be using magic, however, I was already learning spells at your age and I see no reason why you shouldn’t begin learning the fundamentals.At least in theory.”

With a giant sniff, Soren tried to suck in the rest of the mucous that was threatening to continue out of his nose. He lifted an arm to wipe with his sleeve but before it got to his face—-Snape grabbed it.

“Use. Your. Handkerchief. I didn’t give it to you as a decorative piece.”

Soren wiped his face and blew slightly into the soft cloth before he looked up again, briefly. “Can’t I go to real school?” he asked, his swollen eyes darting back to his hands, where he was playing with an edge of the wadded up linen. 

“Did you go to school before?”

“No.”

“No, sir .” Snape grabbed the boy’s thin wrist and brought him closer. He wordlessly banished the dirty handkerchief from his hands. “Address me properly. I do not want to remind you again.”

A slight blush rose in Soren’s cheeks. “No, sir.”

“So why do you think you would go to school now? You will attend boarding school when you turn 11. Hopefully you’ll receive a letter from Hogwarts, if not, I’m sure I’ll find somewhere that will take you. But for now your governess will teach you everything you need to know. That is generally how it is done amongst wizards of means.”

“Will she play with me too? My mummy used to play lots of fun games with me.” His eyes filled with tears, but this time, he did not let them fall, trying his best to put on a brave face. 

“I’m not paying her to play games with you. She’s here to focus on your education, both academic and life skills. Her job is to prepare you for your future as a magical person of privilege. And you will do well to obey her, she will have my full authority to discipline you as she sees fit.”

Soren wasn’t entirely sure what he meant by that, but it sounded ominous. 

“I’ll also send for some new clothes for you. Tinny will get your measurements later today and I’ll send them off to the tailor. I want you looking presentable each day when you go to learn. These rags will have to go.” Snape looked at the boy’s dirty sleeves with disgust. 

“Can you get me some toys as well?” Soren asked, with hope in his eyes. All he had with him was his bunny, a few children’s books, and a puzzle that Ginny had gotten for him.

“Do I look like Father Christmas to you? If you want entertainment, you may read a book or go for a walk with your governess around the grounds. You will not sit around rotting your brain by playing with silly, useless little toys.”

The disappointment was written all over Soren’s face but he wouldn’t dare talk back. “Oh.”

“You do know how to read, don’t you?” The tone came out far more scathing than Snape had intended, but as someone who had learned to read at the age of 4, it never occurred to him that a boy Soren’s age may not know how, and he dreaded to think about what that meant for him catching up in his education. 

“Yes, sir. Not that good, but a little bit. My mum was teaching me.”

“Yes, that’s rather why I was asking. Your mother wasn’t exactly known for her intellectual prowess.” Snape mentally added No, she was known for her voluptuous arse and her seductive brown eyes. The thought caused a smirk to flash briefly across his lips, before he stilled his face at the inappropriate thought. She’s dead, you bastard, what is wrong with you?

“Now then, I have a lot of work to do. You may go to your room or go to the downstairs library to read. I do not want to hear a peep from you until I call for you. If you need something, you may ask Tinny. You do not have permission to be anywhere else. Suffice it to say, if I find you outside of your bedroom or the library, I will not be pleased. Do you understand?”

Soren nodded, but quickly amended “Yes, sir,” before retreating back up the stairs to cuddle his rabbit and think about his mum. 

After reviewing dozens more letters and CVs, Snape finally settled on one he thought stood out amongst the rest. His only concern was that she was young, and she only had a few years of experience, but overall her credentials were exceptional. 

She had graduated from Beauxbatons 10 years earlier and after a stint in graduate school, had worked with a British wizarding family until they relocated overseas. She had more OWLS and NEWTS than almost anyone else, and she was fluent in English, French, and Latin. Her references were glowing and she had written a compelling letter about her ideas around the intersection between muggle and magical education. 

Snape’s only concern was that she seemed a bit “new age” for his taste—discussing her ideas of pedagogy and creating a “positive learning environment” that incentivized learning and curiosity and cultivating individual interests both inside and outside of the classroom. 

It couldn’t be further from Snape’s own ideas about teaching. Even though he had been one of the younger teachers at Hogwarts, his methods were old-school and he stood by them. Fear, intimidation, and absolutely no nonsense whatsoever. He believed that hard work, focus and discipline were the key to mastering magic— none of this 21st century child-centered ridiculousness. 

That being said, he’d be sure to lay out how he wanted things done. As long as she was bright and capable, he was confident he could make sure she held Soren to his exacting standards. 

They had arranged for her to come at 2pm. Once again, Snape had Tinny prepare a lovely tea and he made an extra effort to dress up, putting on his nicest set of dress robes over his dark frock coat.

He had nearly forgotten about Soren, when he suddenly remembered the boy’s stained shirt and cringed, knowing he would need to make the boy more presentable, and not wanting to be embarrassed by having his son look like a complete ragamuffin.  

When he entered Soren’s room, he expected to find him moping about on the bed as always, but the room was empty. Snape was pretty sure he hadn’t seen him come down the stairs to the library, so he called out for him, anger rising into his chest.

“Soren? Where are you? Show yourself this instant!” There was no mistaking the tone of Snape’s voice, he was clearly displeased and if Soren had any sense, he wouldn’t drag things out. Snape stepped out into the hallway, becoming more enraged by the second. “I am in no mood to go searching for you, so wherever you are, you will come here, immediately.”

He let his deep voice carry through the entire upstairs. Finally, a small head poked out from the large playroom that Snape had turned into a classroom. 

Before the boy could even step fully into the hallway, Snape had swooped toward him and grabbed him by his upper arm. “I told you to stay in your room or the library, how dare you disobey me!” He gave him a small shake before returning to his full height and dragging the boy back toward his bedroom. “Let’s go.”

Soren started sobbing immediately. “I’m sorry!”

Without another word, Snape brought him to the center of his room, fighting every urge he had not to give him a proper smack. “I don’t have time to deal with you right now, and you’re very lucky I don’t. You will dry your tears, wash your face, and comb your hair. We have a guest arriving imminently. Now stay still.” 

Snape pulled out his wand and attempted to transfigure Soren’s clothes into something a bit nicer, but there was only so much he could do. The clothes were clearly second-hand, and while it was obvious that someone had tried to take care of them, the fabric was threadbare and stained in places and magical manipulation could only do so much. 

With a rough grasp on the boy’s arm, he spun him around to make sure he wasn’t missing any gaping holes or horrible stains. Using less than gentle hands, he straightened the boy's shirt and pants. 

Soren whimpered slightly and several tears continued to fall. 

“Quit your sniveling. I haven’t given you anything to cry about, now stop it right now, your face will look a mess.” Flicking his wand in several sharp movements, clearly indicating his annoyance, he conjured a small flannel, spraying it with cool water using a silent Aguamenti charm. 

He handed it to Soren before snapping, “Wipe your face, and stop crying this instant or you’ll be standing in the corner until our guest arrives. Now that’s enough.”

The little boy’s breath hitched dramatically one more time and Snape just stared at him, daring him to do it one more time. Not another tear fell. 

Although he didn’t say anything, Soren was secretly amazed watching his father do magic. He’d never seen anyone do wordless magic before. The man must be a very powerful wizard indeed. His mother only knew a handful of spells, and sometimes she couldn’t even get them to work. 

When Snape was done fussing with his clothes he sighed. “This will have to do. Get me your comb.”

Afraid to anger the man further, Soren sprinted to his wardrobe where he had a small comb and brush set his mother had given him. It looked old, as though it had been passed down through several generations, and again, well-looked after but not very expensive. He handed them over reluctantly to Snape.

“Sit.” Snape spat, irritation still in his voice as he pointed toward the bed with the comb in his hand. 

Again, Soren complied quickly, not wanting to incur any further wrath from a man who clearly had very little patience. For anything. 

Snape spoke brusquely as he ran the comb through the boy’s silky black hair, wetting it with little splashes of water from his wand and putting in a perfect side part before smoothing it down with his hand until he was satisfied.  “There’s a woman arriving shortly whom I’m hoping will be your new governess. You will be on your absolute best behavior. If you embarrass me by misbehaving in front of her, I won’t hesitate to return the favor.  When I call for you, you will come downstairs, introduce yourself properly, and sit quietly until I dismiss you. Do you understand?”

Tears were sitting in Soren’s eyes but he nodded his head. “Yes, sir.”

“Do not dare disobey me again. You will sit here, on this bed, until Tinny comes to get you. If I see any more defiance from you today, you will be swiftly punished. Now fix your face, I don’t expect you to feign happiness but I’m growing quite weary of your incessant pout.”

And with that, Snape swept out of the room, breathing an exasperated sigh audibly into the hallway as he made his way down to the parlor. His mood was now spoiled, and there was an anxiety he hadn’t felt in years crawling over his skin. He attempted to take a few deep breaths to calm himself, but he was out of practice. It had been a long time since he’d had to worry about anything or anyone else and it was draining him.

Once he was sure everything was in place, Snape sat silently in his armchair near the fireplace trying to mentally prepare for this meeting. He needed it to go well, he couldn’t possibly go another day without help. How he had managed a house full of stubborn children, for years, was beyond him. It had been one day with this little cretin and it was enough to drive him to the madhouse. 

At exactly 2pm, the floo roared with the governess’s arrival. The woman who stepped out of the fireplace was absolutely stunning. It had been years since a woman had caught his eye, and while normally he wasn’t so superficial as to fixate on anyone’s looks, her beauty was hard to ignore. Something inside of him stirred for the first time in many, many years. He suppressed it, of course, but he couldn’t stamp it out altogether. 

“Lord Kent? I’m Marie Cloutier. It's a pleasure to meet you.” She stuck out her hand confidently and he was surprised by her American accent. Based on her name, and her résumé, he had presumed her to be French or European of some sort. 

“Ms. Cloutier, please, come in, make yourself comfortable.” Snape gestured to his couch and waited for her to take a seat before he sat in his armchair. Tinny arrived soon after with the tea service and began to pour them each a cup of his best Darjeeling tea. 

“Thank you for making time to meet with me on such short notice. I was very impressed by your credentials, and your references were impeccable.” Snape said casually as he stirred his tea and sat back in his chair. 

“Thank you, sir. I’m looking forward to learning more about what you expect from someone in this position. As you know, I take my job as an educator very seriously, so it’s important that we’re on the same page. I’m also quite looking forward to meeting your son.” She smiled at Snape as she took a sip from her own cup. 

“Yes, Soren. He’s 7 years-old.” Snape put down his own cup and paused for several seconds before he began again. “I will be honest with you, Ms. Cloutier, your job will be a challenging one. The boy has just lost his mother, and I’m afraid his education up to this point has been severely lacking. His mother attempted to homeschool him, but I’m afraid she had no credentials of her own so he is rather far behind.”

The young woman’s face fell. “Oh, the poor boy, he’s just lost his mother. I’m so sorry for your loss, Lord Kent. What a tragedy for both of you.”

Snape wrinkled his face briefly. “Yes, well, as it turns out I had no real relationship with his mother outside a few…encounters…many years ago. I know nothing of the boy and feel nothing for his deceased mother. I only found out that he even existed a few days ago, and unfortunately, I am the only family he has. While I have no interest in taking on an ill-mannered, sickly little brat, I’m afraid I have no other choice.”

The look on Marie’s face betrayed her, she was clearly appalled. What kind of man feels nothing for his own son? Her heart went immediately to the poor boy who had not only lost a mother, but gained a heartless, uncaring man like this as a father. 

She waited a moment to compose herself before she spoke again. “Where is Soren now, Lord Kent? I’d like to meet him, please.”

“Yes, of course. Tinny!” Snape called. “Bring Soren.”

The two adults sat for several minutes sipping their tea and chatting about some of the highlights on her resume, her education at Beauxbatons, and the previous family she worked for. The brief conversation ended with an awkward silence, punctuated by the popping and crackling of the logs in the fireplace. Finally, they heard the soft patter of two small feet, interrupted by a few dramatic sniffs of a child’s runny nose, plagued by recent tears and the damp frigid air of the manor house. 

Finally, Soren appeared, head down, at the entrance to the parlor, holding his rabbit and chewing on the sleeve of his recently transfigured hand-me-down shirt. Snape had to stop himself from rolling his eyes at the pathetic display. 

“Hello! You must be Soren,” Marie said gently. “It’s very nice to meet you.”

The seconds ticked by and Soren refused to look up or respond, only grasping his rabbit more tightly. Snape could feel his irritation growing as it became clear that the boy was not planning to comply with any of the expectations he’d set forth during their previous conversation.  

When he couldn’t stand it any longer, Snape lashed out. “Well, aren’t you going to introduce yourself, you insolent little boy? I should have given you a good smack yesterday, then maybe you would know how to act properly today.”

“Lord Kent, it’s quite alright, he’s just shy.” Marie was shocked and got up from the sofa instantly and walked toward the boy, kneeling in front of him so she was at eye-level. “Soren, my name is Ms. Cloutier, I’m hopefully going to be your new governess. Who is your little friend?”

She reached out kindly to take his hand in hers, but he jerked it away without looking at her. 

“Go away,” he snapped, without looking up, burying his head in his rabbit so his words were muffled. “I don’t want you here. I want my mummy.”

Snape scoffed from his armchair. “Just as I said, insolent. Impertinent. In dire need of discipline, not coddling,” He sneered as he smoothed his robes down with his left hand. 

“He’s had seven years of being spoiled by an overindulgent mother. Don’t waste your time trying to win him over with kindness, Ms. Cloutier. I’m looking for a governess who will be able to keep him in line, ensure that he meets my rigorous academic standards and teach him how to comport himself in front of others…which, as you can clearly see right now, he is very much wont to do.”

Soren looked up briefly from his rabbit and narrowed his eyes at Snape in his most courageous display yet. “I hate you! I wish you were dead, not my mum. You’re the meanest man in the whole world! I HOPE YOU DIE!” He was screaming at the top of his lungs by the end of his little tirade.

Without a moment of hesitation, Snape rose immediately from his chair and took three long strides toward the boy before grabbing his arm, jerking him forward, and bending him awkwardly over his left thigh while he rained down a good half-dozen hard smacks on his small backside. “How DARE you speak to me that way.” He paused for a moment before delivering two more extremely hard strikes in the same exact spot until the boy broke down crying, the unmistakable sounds of the smacks echoing loudly through the vast halls of the manor. 

When he was sure the boy was crying real tears, he let go, and allowed him to crumple to the floor in a heap. 

“Lord Kent, please!” Marie shouted, grabbing the sobbing little boy and lifting him off the ground, holding him tightly to her chest. “That was completely unnecessary! He’s a little boy, there’s no reason to ever raise your hand to him in that way!”

Snape allowed a small smirk to cross his lips as he returned to his chair and casually took a sip of tea. “A few smacks of my hand on his clothed backside. Please, Ms. Cloutier. I’ve hardly beaten him. My father would have belted him raw for that kind of blatant disrespect. He was warned, multiple times, about what would happen if he acted up. He was seriously out of order and needed to be taught a lesson, and hopefully now he has.” 

Snape looked at the pitiful little boy, sobbing into the governess, one hand on his bum, the other clenching his threadbare rabbit. He kept his voice even but stern. “That’s quite enough Soren, you’re dismissed. If you attempt any further disruption this afternoon, I will take you to my study and give you a proper hiding. So I suggest you use this as an opportunity to straighten yourself out.”

Soren didn’t need another moment, he bolted for the stairs without a second look back, waiting until he was in his room before he cried loudly into the bedsheets, his backside still throbbing, and no fight left in him. 

“Now, where were we?” Snape asked, calmly sipping his tea as if nothing had happened. “Have a seat Ms. Cloutier, I wish to move forward as soon as possible. Unless, of course, you’ve decided that Soren is beyond what you can manage, and truthfully I wouldn’t blame you if that was the case.”

Marie’s face was burning with anger, her hands clenched down at her sides, she was still in shock that she’d seen the man smack that poor little boy over a small emotional outburst—especially given the boy’s circumstances. She was torn. Part of her was utterly disgusted with the man in front of her, to the point that she wasn’t sure if she could tolerate the sight of him for a minute longer, but the righteous part of her knew that this little boy desperately needed her. And she knew if she ever wanted to build her own school and follow her dreams, she would probably never get another chance at the kind of money he was offering her. 

“Soren isn’t the problem, sir, I assure you” she said blatantly, making it clear she disapproved of him. 

“Oh?” Snape replied, with mock surprise in his voice and a carefully arched brow. “It is up to you. You may disapprove of my parenting style privately, but I will not have you interfering or questioning my methods openly, particularly not in front of Soren. I will not lower my standards when it comes to raising my son. I’m not sure what your background is, Ms. Cloutier, but in the wizarding community here in Britain, corporal punishment is still considered more than acceptable. I’m afraid you’ll need to accept that, otherwise this might not be the position for you. ”

“My mother is American and my father is Quebecois,” she answered, the scowl still on her face. “They managed to raise me quite effectively without resorting to hitting me.”

“I see. Well you’re welcome to your own beliefs, but I do not plan on changing mine. I would prefer you to use a firm hand with Soren, but if you choose not to, just know that if he fails to meet my expectations, both with regard to his studies and his behavior, he will answer to me. Every time, unfailingly. And you’ve now seen exactly how I will handle things. So for his sake, I hope you succeed in your methods. It would be a shame to have him pay the price for your shortcomings.“

More determined than ever, Marie took this as a personal challenge. “I assure you Lord Kent, I will exceed your expectations when it comes to Soren and I will do so without having to resort to brutality.”

“How charming.” Snape smirked, enjoying that she had a bit of fight in her. “Does this mean you’ll be accepting the position, then?” 

Marie nodded. “Yes. As long as you accept all of the terms and conditions I laid out in my letter.”

“Yes. Your rates are acceptable. I will also take care of any and all of your expenses whilst you live here. All of your meals, clothes, supplies, and anything else you need or want. Your salary will be deposited directly into your vault on the first of each month. Anything else you need, please submit it to me in writing and I will see that it is taken care of with the highest priority. You will be expected to take meals with us on working days, so if you have any dietary restrictions, you must let Tinny know immediately. You will be responsible for Soren waking up, getting ready, and completing his school work and you will look after him until you put him to bed, at which point the rest of your evening is free. Sundays are your own, you may do what you please, although you are welcome to join us for meals if you wish. Are there any other questions?”

If she was honest, she was quite surprised he was agreeing to the outrageous salary she’d put forth in her letter, but I guess money was no object, and he seemed desperate for the help. If she could keep this job for a year, even, she was sure she’d have enough to get started. 

“And the bonus for starting immediately?” 

“I’ll have it transferred as soon as you sign the contract. Is there anything else you require before we get started? I’ve set up your room in the same wing as Soren. There is also a large room you may use for your instruction, it should be supplied with everything he needs to begin his studies. If you find anything lacking, let me know immediately. I don’t want any further delay with regard to his education. And I apologize once again for Soren’s rude behavior today, I assure you he will be in much better form the next time you see him.”

“He’s been through a lot, it is understandable. Developmentally appropriate, even,” she added knowingly. 

“It is completely unacceptable, do not excuse it.”

Recognizing she would get nowhere by arguing with the man, Marie nodded. “Very well. Thank you, Lord Kent, I’m looking forward to getting to know Soren, he seems like a good boy who is just going through a hard time. And if I may suggest, sir, perhaps you should go and speak to him after I leave. I'm sure he’s quite upset right now, he could probably use some kind words.”                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                               

Snape detested anyone giving him unsolicited advice. Even if he had never been a parent, he’d spent decades of his life managing hundreds of children and he had no intention of changing his ways. But he chose his words carefully, not wanting Marie to change her mind before she even signed the contract. She was by far the best candidate and he was eager to have her, even if he recognized she might prove challenging.

“It is not the first time a boy has sulked after getting a smack, and it won’t be the last. He’ll hopefully think twice before speaking to anyone that way again. And if he wants kind words, Ms. Cloutier, he’ll have to earn them. I don’t give them away to naughty little boys who have the audacity to disrespect me in my own home. Now, then, if you’ve got no further suggestions for me”—he raised an eyebrow in clear disapproval—“perhaps you’d like to return home and gather your belongings. You can join us for dinner this evening at 6:30pm and begin with Soren in the morning.”

Snape stood to say goodbye.

Marie was struck by how tall he was when he stood next to her. She wasn’t easily intimidated, but the man had a powerful presence, and it was clear he was used to getting his way. 

Unperturbed by his disapproving look and patronizing tone, she let his snide remark go without appearing bothered by it. She held her head high and reached out her hand. “Thank you, Lord Kent. I will see you this evening. I appreciate the opportunity.”

“You’re quite welcome, Ms. Cloutier. This will hopefully be a fruitful situation for all of us.” He shook her hand and reached for the bowl of floo powder on the mantle, but before he could offer it to her, she’d reached into her bag, pulled out her own and exited into the flame. 

Snape stood for a moment inhaling the air that lingered with the slightest hint of her perfume. He couldn’t quite put his finger on what was so intoxicating about it, although he picked up notes of jasmine, magnolia, and something woody…sandalwood perhaps? Whatever it was, it suited her. And it stayed with him, imprinting her deep in his memory. 

He settled back into his chair and smiled to himself, pleased with his choice. She was a bit feisty, and would probably cause him some trouble on occasion, but she was clearly an intelligent witch, and as long as she stayed in her lane, and did her job to his satisfaction, perhaps it wouldn’t be so terrible having her around. He hadn’t realized how starved he was for adult interaction. Q

The sense of relief that filled him at finally having a governess quickly evaporated when he remembered that Soren was upstairs, likely still crying and sulking. He rolled his eyes and decided it was best to just leave him there for a while. Perhaps it would do the boy some good to think about his behavior for another few hours. Snape needed some time to himself to process it all.

Up in his room, Soren was distraught. The sting in his backside was fading quickly, but his face burned with humiliation every time he thought about it.  He missed his mum more than ever; he didn’t understand how she could ever be with a man who was so cruel and mean. Everytime he thought about it, he cried harder, until he’d sobbed himself into such a state of exhaustion that he fell into a deep sleep, his nose pressed into his bunny, desperate to catch the smallest hint of his mother’s scent to transport him back to his old life.

When he woke up again, almost two hours had passed and he was surprised that he felt completely normal again, maybe even better? The sleep had somehow been restorative, and any lingering effects of his earlier smacking were now long gone, much to his disappointment. He could have justified carrying-on feeling sorry for himself if he’d still had something to show for it.  Although he was still angry he’d been punished like that in front of that lady, he could no longer pretend it had been anything other than a short and rather childish spanking, not at all the brutal beating he had made it out to be in his mind. 

Still, it was not something he wished to experience again, so he’d have to try harder to avoid it. Hopefully he wouldn’t have to see his father much at all now that he was getting this, what was it, “governess” to take care of him? She seemed nice enough, anyone was better than his father. Based on how she’d reacted to the whole scenario, he didn’t think she would ever punish him in that way, so as long as he didn’t get on her bad side, he could hopefully avoid his father’s ire in the future. 

He laid on his bed, playing with his rabbit and allowing himself to fantasize about all kinds of horrible things happening to his father. He smiled to himself every time he imagined something especially painful, like a tiger ripping him apart by the limbs while he screamed for help and no one came.

He was enjoying a particularly gruesome thought when his daydream was interrupted by his father clearing his throat in the doorway. Sitting up immediately, he plastered on a sad and pitiful look, hoping the man couldn’t read his thoughts. 

“Well, now that you’ve had some time to think about your egregious behavior, what do you have to say for yourself?” Snape wasn’t angry, but his goal was to ensure the lesson was learned; he despised having to repeat himself, and woe be upon anyone who needed to be punished again for the same offense. 

“I’m sorry.” Soren whispered, clutching his rabbit tightly. 

“I’m sorry, sir. ” Snape repeated, “And look at me when you’re speaking to me. Honestly, your manners are absolutely atrocious.”

“I’m sorry, sir,” Soren said, looking up at the intimidating face of his father from the top of his eyes. Although the man’s face seemed a bit softer now, and definitely not as angry, he still managed to look stern and cold. 

“For what, exactly? I don’t want you to simply say the words, I want to know that you understand the nature of your transgressions and why you were punished.”

A blush creeped across Soren’s face and he ran his hands over his bunny’s ears, fidgeting as he thought about what to say. “I’m sorry I said those mean things.”

“And?”

Soren looked up now confused. “I don’t know?”

“Perhaps you need more time to reflect on it, then. It’s a good thing there are numerous corners in this manor where you can contemplate it further. It seems that despite your BAFTA-worthy performance downstairs, I didn’t make nearly as strong of an impression as I was hoping.”  

“No, sir!” Soren panicked. “You did, please. I said I was sorry!! I didn’t mean to say those mean things. I don’t know what you want me to say!”

“Allow me to assist you, then.” Snape leaned down so his face was menacingly close to Soren’s. “Despite making it very clear how I expected you to behave in front of our guest, you refused to look at her, didn’t respond to her when she spoke to you, and you neglected to properly introduce yourself. Then you had the gall to be rude to her with no provocation whatsoever. The blatant disrespect you showed me after that was just the final straw. Not to mention your earlier disobedience which I can promise you, in future, will not go unpunished. Now that I think about it, I would say you got off extremely lightly. Do not expect me to be so lenient again.”

Snape did love a good lecture. Although there wasn’t a single part of him that regretted spanking the boy— if one could even call it that—barely half a dozen smacks hardly qualified as a true punishment in his book, he believed the real lasting effect came from a good lecture to drive it all home. 

Although Soren would disagree that he got off lightly, now that his misdeeds were being itemized, he did have to admit he had pushed the man a bit too far, despite multiple warnings.  

“I hardly think your mother would have been impressed by your behavior today, do you? Even if you haven’t been taught proper manners, I would like to think she raised you better than that, or was being rude to your elders acceptable in your previous home?” 

Snape’s expert-level chastising was not being lost on Soren, and his earlier anger was now being replaced by true remorse and shame. His cheeks flushed again at the thought of his mother seeing him say such rude things to his father, and that poor lady, who hadn’t done anything to deserve it. He shook his head and whispered. “No, sir. She wouldn’t like it.”

“I thought not. So I hope for your sake, and for the sake of your mother’s memory, you will think carefully before acting so appallingly in future.”

Tears were rolling down the boy's cheeks and he nodded his head. “I’m sorry.” 

Snape stood over him for a moment before replying. “Good. Then let that be the end of it. Clean yourself up and then you may come down for tea. But I meant what I said earlier- anymore disrespect or defiance from you today and it will earn you a trip to my study, where I assure you, I will make a valiant effort to leave a much more lasting impression.” He raised his eyebrow and glared down at the boy, hoping that would be enough. 

His little speech had the intended effect, Soren’s eyes were wide with fear and he swallowed audibly, his heart racing at the thought of what horrors a trip to his study might entail. He shook his head vigorously. “I won’t. I’ll be good, I promise.”

“That would be my recommendation. Oh, and Ms. Cloutier will be joining us starting tonight at supper. Despite your ghastly behavior earlier, she’s somehow still interested in being your governess. I expect you to apologize—properly—when you see her later. Do not disappoint me further.”

Snape took one last look at the boy before leaving to enjoy his tea. He felt better now knowing, despite Marie’s protestations that he had traumatized the boy, Soren was perfectly alright. Although Snape had hidden it well, he couldn’t help but be amused when he first walked in the room and saw the boy smiling while he imagined Snape’s eyes being pecked out and eaten by an angry crow while his body was impaled on the Tower of London. It was darkly creative…perhaps the boy was his son after all

Chapter Text

Downstairs, Snape sat in quiet contemplation while sipping his tea. Somehow having this boy…his son he had to remind himself…had opened up an emotional portal to his former life. Memories of life at Hogwarts that he had successfully blocked out for years, were suddenly flooding back.

"Father?"

Snape's stomach dropped at the word and he was brought sharply back to reality as he turned toward the pale little boy standing near the doorway.

"Do not shout at me from the doorway, I am not a playmate you're calling into the street. If you wish to speak with me, you will have the decency to present yourself in front of me."

Soren shuffled further into the room, but still kept his distance. "I'm cold."

"Then put on a jumper. I'm sure you're old enough to manage that on your own, you're not an infant."

Though he sounded nonplussed, Snape pulled his wand out from his left sleeve and added several logs to the fire for good measure. He was quite used to the cold, and since he continued to dress in thick wool clothes, including his favorite frock coat that went from his neck all the way down his arms and halfway down his legs, he was always warm. But one quick look at the frail little boy in his thin cotton clothes and he felt a small pang of guilt. Had he not realized how cold it was?

"I don't have a jumper. And my hands and feet are numb."

"Well, then perhaps you ought to sit closer to the fire and have a cup of tea, whinging about it certainly isn't going to make you any warmer." Snape said dismissively, as he pointed his wand lazily at the rug in front of the fireplace before returning to his book.

Soren sat down on the ancient, worn and soot-stained Persian rug and pulled his knees up, shivering slightly as he waited for the flames to warm him up, his hands out in front of him to soak in the heat.

Another few minutes went by, the parlor silent except for the occasional sound of a page turning and quiet sniffs coming from the little boy's runny nose. After the third one, Snape looked up ready to tell him off for his incessant sniffling, when he realized the boy was still shivering, his lips looking slightly blue. He put his book down and paused for a moment before snapping his fingers, calling for Tinny.

The house elf appeared immediately. "How can Tinny help, sir?"

"Bring me one of my thick wool jumpers, along with a pair of woolen socks and my slippers."

"Yes, sir!" Tinny then disappeared with a pop, returning moments later with the items in hand.

Snape crooked a finger and called to Soren. "Come here."

Soren pushed himself up from the floor and scrambled over until he was standing in front of his father, fidgeting nervously with the hem of his shirt, unsure if he was about to be in trouble again for an offense he hadn't even known he'd committed.

Snape grabbed him by the wrist and pulled him closer while he helped him into the oversized sweater, dressing him like one would a small child. "Lift your foot," Snape said as he slid one of the giant socks over Soren's threadbare ones, then tapping his opposite leg with his wand twice so Soren would repeat the same movement with his other foot, leaving a slight sting in its wake.

Once the garments were in place, he held tightly to Soren's arm and pointed his wand, shrinking the items of clothing one at a time until they fit perfectly.

"Now you may step into the slippers." Snape continued to keep a tight grasp on the boy's arm while repeating the same movements of his wand until each of the slippers were snug on the little boy's feet.

"Thank you, sir." Soren said, the color returning to his face as his body warmed instantly. He wondered for a moment if Snape had cast a silent warming charm as well, as the feeling had returned to both his fingers and toes in a matter of seconds.

After letting him go, Snape cupped the boy's chin in his hand so he could look him in the eyes. "The stone and wood floors can be quite slippery, so I had better not see you ever walking, skipping or Merlin forbid, running around the manor in just your socks. If you disobey me and I have to heal any injuries as a result, rest assured you will not get the benefit of me healing your backside when I'm done with you."

"Yes, sir." His face flushed slightly at the warning.

Snape put a quick hand on his forehead to make sure he wasn't feverish. "Are you unwell?"

The boy shook his head.

"'No, sir,' is the proper response," Snape said, exasperated. "I’m getting tired of reminding you. The next time you fail to respond or address me properly, you'll go to the corner. Let's try again…are you unwell?"

"No, sir."

"Let's hope not. Based on the look of you, I imagine you're quite anemic, so I expect to see you eating properly at supper tonight. I will make sure Tinny prepares iron-rich meals moving forward. And you would do well to eat them," Snape scolded, looking down at the boy with piercing dark eyes. "There will be no more of this 'I'm not hungry' business or you'll be getting a lot more than just a nutrition potion after your meal. Am I clear?" He narrowed his eyes to make sure his threat was being clearly understood.

"Yes, sir," Soren said, trying not to smile. Even though his father was still managing to scold and threaten him at every turn, there was something reassuring about the gentle way he'd dressed him and made sure he was warm—it made him feel truly cared for, for the first time since he arrived. It was certainly miles better than every other interaction he'd had with the man thus far.

"Your new clothes should arrive in a few days, until then, you may borrow these. I'll also make sure Tinny keeps the fire going in your room at night, it won't do for you to come down with an illness just as we're about to start your lessons. You're behind enough as it is. Now then, sit down and drink your tea." Snape sent him on his way with a gentle push between his shoulder blades. "One biscuit only, you will eat your supper tonight."

As soon as Soren was on the couch, Snape lazily flicked his wand and a blanket came flying out of nowhere, laying itself on top of his lap. Soren smiled, feeling warm and cozy as he enjoyed his tea and the one biscuit he was being allowed so he didn't spoil his dinner. It was the first time he believed that maybe he would be OK here.

Just as Tinny was about to clear the tea service, the floo whooshed and Marie appeared in the green flames. Snape stood and extended a hand to help her step over the hearth. To his surprise, she took hold of it gently while she stepped out, letting it go a moment later as she dusted herself off.

"Ah, Ms. Cloutier, just in time, we were just finishing our afternoon tea. Would you care for a cup before we clear it?" Snape asked, politely.

"No thank you. I'm eager to get settled in if that's alright. It's been quite a long day." She looked up and was surprised to see Soren sitting on the couch, looking much happier than the last time she'd seen him. "Hello Soren, how wonderful to see you again."

Snape shot Soren a stern look.

After taking a small breath, the little boy unwrapped the blanket and climbed off the sofa, walking directly toward Marie. He put out his hand and looked up at her kind blue eyes. "It's nice to see you, Ms. Cloutier. I'm very sorry I was rude before. I won't do it again." Soren flashed a quick glance over at Snape who nodded in approval, which caused his ears to flush and his gaze to drop to the floor.

Marie leaned down and brought him into a tight embrace. "All is forgiven, Soren. I'm looking forward to us getting to know each other. Thank you for giving me a chance."

Soren fell into the hug, not realizing how much he'd missed having someone hold him. He wrapped his arms around her neck and she squeezed a little tighter before letting him go with an affectionate pat on the shoulder.

Snape was quietly pleased, in fact, he had to control himself from sending an arrogant smirk toward Marie as if to say "See, I told you my methods worked."

Instead he kept his face neutral as he focused his attention softly in her direction. "I can show you to your room and you can settle in and take some rest. Then we can tour the manor whenever you're up for it, either before or after dinner."

"Thank you, that would be lovely."

"Soren, you may come along," Snape clicked his fingers at the boy, directing him to follow.

Snape took Marie up the stairs and to the right. "This is the West wing—your bedroom, Soren's room, and the classroom are all in this Wing. My bedroom and my personal study are in the East wing on the opposite side of the staircase. But barring an emergency, I see no reason you should ever need to be there."

"Unless you're in trouble." Soren chimed in from the steps below.

"Pardon?" Snape said, glaring down at the boy from the top stair.

"You said any more misbehavior will be dealt with in your study. So I'm just telling Ms. Cloutier so she knows too. You don't want to go there."

"That was meant as a warning for you, Soren, not Ms. Cloutier. She's an adult."

Marie let out a hearty chuckle before bringing a hand to cover her mouth. "I'll do my best to not to misbehave, Soren, thank you for the warning. Hopefully neither of us will need a trip to your father's study anytime soon."

Soren laughed along with her as he bounded the rest of the way up the stairs to her side.

Snape paused to turn and raise an eyebrow at both of them. "I can promise you, if you're asked to see me in my study, it will not be a laughing matter. For either of you."

His eyes darted between them ominously, working hard to keep his sternest face on while they both attempted to stifle their giggles. He could see the two were conspiring already, but seeing Soren smile and hearing his laugh for the first time put a tiny crack in his steely facade.

"Well then, everyone on their best behavior then, right Soren?" Marie winked at the little boy and smiled down on him as she took his hand, following Snape into the West wing a few paces behind.

"This is Soren's room," Snape pointed to the right. "And across the hall, Ms. Cloutier, this will be your room. I hope it is to your satisfaction, but you are welcome to make any magical modifications and if there's anything you need, please let me know. It is of the utmost importance to me that you are comfortable here. You do not need to be a martyr, if something is lacking or not to your liking, we will remedy it straight away."

Marie walked in and took a quick look around. "Oh my, this is beautiful. Thank you Lord Kent, this is more than adequate, it is truly luxurious."

"I'll just show you the classroom and then you can take some time to settle in."

Snape walked a few more paces down the hall until they reached the large room on the left. "This is where you and Soren will work each day. It is set up to function as both a muggle and magical classroom, but again, anything else you need, I will arrange it."

Marie stepped-in and walked around, carefully taking it all in. She was impressed; every detail was in place, it was as if the man had thought of everything. He'd even laid it out in a way that only a teacher would think to do. She wondered who he'd consulted when he had put it together.

Soren wandered toward one of the cabinets, curious about what he would find inside, but just before he could open it, Snape clicked his fingers loudly and shook his head. The boy retreated immediately and slid his hand back into Marie's.

"This is brilliant, Lord Kent…the only question I have is where does Soren play? Does he have another room with his toys and art supplies and things he can explore for fun?" Marie asked as they walked back into the hallway.

Before Snape could respond, Soren spoke up, repeating his father's earlier words with startling accuracy. "My father is not paying you to play with me. If I want entertainment, I can go for a walk outside or read a book. He doesn't want my brain to rot from useless toys."

"Soren, that's enough." Snape said, staring down at the boy with an edge in his voice. "Ms. Cloutier was addressing me, not you. Control your outbursts."

Marie might have laughed at the little boy's honesty if she hadn't been struck by how incredibly sad it was that he was being denied things to play with. "Sir, he's only seven. Playing is an important part of his intellectual, physical, and social development. At his age, he will get much more learning out of play than from only reading from books. May I request some educational toys for him? He can't be expected to only read and study all day."

Snape's face froze in deep displeasure. Without acknowledging Marie, he turned to his son. "Soren— go to your room. I need to speak with Ms. Cloutier, and she needs to unpack and take a rest. I will come and get you shortly."

"But I've been in my room all day! Why am I in trouble, that's exactly what you said!" Soren's voice was dripping with indignation, he thought his father would be impressed that he had remembered every word he said, but instead he was being sent to his room. It was completely unfair!

Snape put his hand on the back of Soren's head and guided him several steps down the hall in the direction of his room. "You are not in trouble, presently, but if you continue to argue with me or speak to me in that tone, you absolutely will be. Now go to your room, close the door, and find a way to entertain yourself until I call for you."

Soren turned around to argue, an impressive scowl on his face, but Snape shot him his most dangerous look yet. "Keep your mouth closed unless you'd like to finish this discussion in my study."

That was all the convincing he needed. Soren turned around and walked silently to his room, upset that his father had ruined everything again. He considered slamming his door, but quickly thought better of it, knowing without a doubt that it would end very badly for him.

Snape took a breath and returned his attention to Marie. He wasn't angry, but he wanted to make it clear that he was not to be constantly challenged. He hardened his voice and spoke to her like he would an errant student. "Ms. Cloutier, while I respect your opinion as an educator, I will decide how I want things done in my home. You are here to teach him, and there is a lot to do. He is barely literate and has almost no formal education. Now is not the time to distract him with toys, no matter how "educational" they're purported to be. I would also appreciate it if you did not question my decisions in front of my son. If you wish to speak with me or engage in a discussion about how things are done, you may request to do so after he has gone to bed. Have I made myself clear?"

Marie was not finished with this discussion, but she didn't want to argue, not like this. She would get her way, eventually, but right now she just wanted to take a moment to rest and settle in, maybe take a bath and relax before dinner. "Yes, sir. I understand. I apologize, I didn't mean to question your decision in front of Soren. I won't let it happen again."

With a nod of his head, Snape ended the conversation. "Very well. Take your time getting comfortable. We will see you at 6:30 downstairs for supper. My house elf, Tinny, is available should you need help with anything."

After closing the door to her room, Marie fell back on her giant bed, allowing herself to drown in the fluffy duvet and mountain of pillows. "My god that man is wound tightly."

Snape was halfway down the stairs when he remembered Soren, and although he would have enjoyed a few extra minutes to himself, he didn't want the boy to feel he was being punished for no reason.

He returned upstairs and knocked briefly on the boy's door before entering it.

Soren was back moping on his bed, cuddling his rabbit and staring at the wall.

"You may come downstairs now," Snape said, not really in the mood to deal with more drama.

"I don't want to," Soren whined, clutching his rabbit and refusing to make eye-contact with his father, the hurt evident in his voice.

Refusing to indulge the boy's tantrum, Snape responded coolly. "Very well, I will send Tinny to fetch you when it's time for supper." He turned to walk out the door.

Soren sat up and narrowed his eyes in a way that made him look very much like his father, "I'm not coming to dinner either."

Snape stopped, turned on his heel, and hardened his face into a scowl as he stalked toward the bed. "I beg your pardon?"

"I don't feel like eating." Soren was angry and upset, and he knew this was the one thing he could say and do that would cause his father to be concerned. He wanted to feel loved and cared for again, and the only way he knew how to do that was by making his father worry about him, and he figured if he refused to eat, he would accomplish just that.

"Very well," Snape said matter of factly, "Then after Ms. Cloutier and I finish dinner, you will report to my study for a dose of nutrition potion and the slipper."

"That's not fair! I'm not feeling well!" Soren had just lost control over the situation and panic was rising in his chest. This wasn't how he imagined it going at all.

Snape leaned in and spoke slowly, articulating each word. "Do you think I'm a fool? Do you think you're the first child who has ever tried to manipulate me in this way?" Snape shook his head thinking about how many times he dealt with students faking illness for one reason or another— they wanted a lie-in, they wanted to get out of an assignment or test, they wanted pity or sympathy, or to get out of trouble. This was not a new tactic for him.

"Listen to me very carefully. I'm going to give you several options, and I suggest you choose wisely. First, you can rethink this infantile ploy for attention and come down for dinner without any further incident, and I will graciously file this away as an unfortunate miscalculation in judgment whilst you eat a proper meal and we all move forward with our evening. Or you can continue to insist you're unwell, I will run a diagnostic spell, and when it comes back that you are in perfectly good health, I will take you over my knee and spank you for lying and then give you the opportunity to eat your supper. If you still refuse to eat after that, when the meal has finished, I will take you to my study and slipper your backside soundly before putting you straight to bed. We will continue to do this for every meal until you decide you're ready to eat. Believe me, your backside will wear out long before my resolve."

Soren's mouth went dry at the thought of it, he had no doubt his father would follow through and there was no way he wanted any of that. "Fine then, I'll eat."

"Go face the wall." Snape clicked his fingers and pointed toward the corner to his left. "You do not speak to me in that tone or in that manner. I've also told you at least a dozen times today how you're to address me, so there's no more excuse for your insolence."

Soren's eyes filled with tears as he pushed himself off the bed. Before he could walk to the corner, Snape's hand reached down and snatched the stuffed rabbit out of his arms. "Your rabbit didn't misbehave, so he will stay on the bed. You will also not take him out of this room again, do you understand?"

"Yes, sir," Soren said quietly, tears streaming down his face as he walked quickly to the corner, feeling particularly sorry for himself that his plan had backfired and now instead of being doted on and fussed over, he was in trouble. Again.

Snape followed him to the corner and spoke to the back of his head. "You will stay there for the next 15 minutes. I will send Tinny when your time is up, at which point you are welcome to come downstairs—with a much more pleasant attitude. Then, if you've decided you're done playing silly little games with me, you will eat your dinner and we can have a much more pleasant evening. It's completely up to you, I've made your options very clear."

With that, Snape stalked out of the room, leaving the little boy crying quietly in the corner.

A few minutes before 6:30, Marie came down the stairs feeling rested and fresh. She found Snape reading in the parlor, quietly.

"Where's Soren?"

Snape looked up at the clock on the mantle. "He should be here shortly. I will have Tinny fetch him now."

With a snap of his fingers, Tinny appeared "Please fetch Soren, tell him he has 3 minutes to tidy himself and be down for supper. Let him know if I have to come up there, any amnesty we discussed will be off the table."

Tinny disappeared with a pop and Snape redirected his attention to Marie, who was doing her best not to look invested in what the man had just said to his house elf.

"Did you have a chance to rest, Ms Cloutier?" Snape asked, keeping his tone light and friendly, "Is the room comfortable?"

"Very much so, thank you. The bed was like sleeping on a cloud. I really appreciate you for arranging such a nice space for me."

Snape nodded. "Good."

Two minutes later, Soren came slowly down the stairs, looking as sullen and dejected as ever. Marie noticed right away and wondered what had possibly transpired during the time she'd been resting in her room.

"Are you feeling alright, Soren? Is something wrong?" Marie could see that his eyes were red and his face swollen from tears.

"He's absolutely fine, Ms. Cloutier. Pay him no attention, he's just sulking because he was sent to the corner for being impertinent." Snape clicked his fingers and pointed to a spot in front of him. "Come here, Soren."

The boy walked slowly to his father, hoping he wasn't about to get told off again in front of Ms. Cloutier. He put on his softest voice and most innocent eyes, not wanting to dare risk being told he had a rude tone. "Yes, Father?"

The word hit Snape again like a punch to the gut, but he composed himself and continued. He reached out and pulled the boy closer so he could speak in a low tone. "I hope you've had a chance to think about our conversation. Is there anything you wish to say?"

"Yes, sir. I'm sorry." Soren made a deliberate effort to make eye contact, even though he was embarrassed to do so.

"Very well. Are you planning to join us for supper this evening or do I need to run a diagnostic spell because you're still not hungry?" Snape raised an eyebrow as if to caution him to answer carefully.

Soren's ears and face burned bright red. "No sir, I'm feeling better. I'd like to eat supper, please."

"Good. Now fix your face and show Ms. Cloutier to the table and let's have no more of your nonsense this evening, hmm?"

"Yes, sir."

Snape tapped him twice on the side of the thigh. "Off you go."

It wasn't exactly the most loving interaction, but Soren still felt relieved, and at least his father hadn't seemed angry anymore. Hopefully if he did everything right, he could end the day on a much better note.

"Come take my hand, Soren, and show me where we're going." Marie smiled at him and put her hand out, and Soren walked over to grab it, immediately feeling more relaxed. When she was sure they were alone, she bent down and whispered in his ear. "I hope there will be something delicious for dessert, its my favorite part!"

Soren looked up at her and smiled. "Me too."

It was an odd experience having two other people at his table, and truthfully, Snape wasn't quite sure how to proceed. Six years of eating alone had suited him just fine, but alas, nothing good could ever last. He tapped his wand and the food appeared.

"What a lovely spread!" Marie exclaimed, looking over a table with a full roast, mashed potatoes, along with green beans, roasted brussel sprouts, and sweet potatoes.

Snape had also brought out one of the better Cabernets from his small collection and he offered some to Marie. "Would you care for a glass of wine?"

"Yes, please. Just a small glass, tomorrow is a very important day."

"Since I have you both here, perhaps this would be a good time to talk about expectations moving forward," Snape said, setting Marie's wine goblet down and pouring himself a glass. "Soren, sit up properly, and keep your arms off the table."

Soren slid his hands into his lap and sat up straight.

"We will have breakfast at 8am tomorrow. I expect everyone to be on time, tardiness to the table will not be acceptable. Ms. Cloutier, you are responsible for yourself, but also for ensuring that Soren is awake, properly dressed, and put together before breakfast. Unless you are gravely ill, I expect everyone at the table for meals. Am I clear so far?"

"Yes, sir," echoed both Soren and Marie in unison.

"Lessons will begin at 8:45, this should give you a few minutes to clean up after breakfast and get any of your things together and take care of any personal needs. Soren, you are to be on time, in the classroom before the clock strikes 8:45. Ms. Cloutier, if he is late, you will let me know. I would like you to keep a daily log, including any notes on his behavior and performance. I will review it at the end of the week and deal with any issues that need to be addressed." He shot Soren a look. "Of course if at any point in time he is grossly out of line or unmanageable, you may to come to me immediately. But otherwise we will address any serious misbehavior in the evenings."

"Ms. Cloutier, you have full domain over your classroom, so I will not interfere, however, I expect to be updated weekly on what he is learning and how he is doing. If he is struggling or excelling, or not paying attention, I want to know."

"Yes, of course, Lord Kent."

"Soren, Ms. Cloutier has my full support in how she handles your discipline in the classroom, however, if I find out you've acted in a way that I feel is unacceptable, you can expect to be punished by me as well. I suggest you behave, I will not take kindly to any negative reports about your behavior."

Soren blushed. "Yes, sir."

"I may pop into the classroom on occasion, but otherwise I shall be occupied with my own work. We will convene for lunch at precisely 12:30pm. After lunch, Soren will have one hour of quiet time to rest before you resume your afternoon coursework at 2pm."

"But I'm too old for a nap," Soren complained.

Snape set his goblet down dramatically and stared at the little boy. "Do not interrupt me. This is my house, I make the rules, and you will obey them. Whether you sleep or not is up to you, but you will take an hour to rest so that your mind is fresh for an afternoon of learning. One more word out of turn, Soren, and you will be asked to leave the table."

"Yes, sir. Sorry."

"Besides, it is not just for your benefit. Ms. Cloutier also deserves to have some time for herself between lessons," he added, knowing how draining it could be to teach all day.

"In the afternoon at some point, I would like it if Soren got outside for a bit of exercise. A walk on the grounds might be nice, you are welcome to turn it into an educational outing. I have vast gardens with many magical plants and potions ingredients, this might be a good time to begin teaching Soren how to identify some of them. However, I will leave it at your discretion."

"Lord Kent, how much would you like us to focus on preparing him for his magical education, or are we only doing Muggle work for now?" Marie asked, sliding some of the roast and veggies onto her plate before lifting her glass for a small sip of wine.

"I want him learning theory, but of course, at his age, there will be no practical magic." Snape turned to Soren. "Do you understand what that means, Soren?"

"Yes, sir."

"You will never, ever, ever attempt magic on your own or outside of a lesson with Ms. Cloutier or myself. While you will never be punished for accidental magic, any deliberate attempt to cast a spell, create a potion, or otherwise invoke your magical ability with purpose is strictly forbidden. And it goes without saying that you are to never touch our wands. Ever. You will also stay away from the potions lab and the dungeons where I do my work. Magic can be extremely dangerous, as you well know." Snape emphasized, knowing the boy's mother had essentially blown herself to pieces due to a failed healing spell/potion combination.

"Sometimes my mum let me practice with her wand. Just little spells. I can do lumos and nox," Soren said proudly.

"Incredibly irresponsible." Snape shook his head and leaned in closer. "Let me be clear…if I find out you've touched a wand without permission before your 11th birthday, it will be the biggest regret of your young life. Do you understand me?"

Soren nodded his head before Snape glared at him and he added an emphatic "Yes, sir."

"Good, now put more vegetables on your plate. That is hardly adequate." Snape said, looking down at the boy's measly plate of food.

"Yes, sir." Soren reached for the sweet potatoes and then put a small portion of green beans, hoping that would be sufficient. He'd already eaten a good dose of the roast and he was feeling pretty full, but there was no way he was going to risk being punished again today.

"To answer your question, Ms. Cloutier, I want him to begin becoming familiar with concepts of magic, magical plants, and important principles behind the theory of magic. You may demonstrate these concepts for him, but you will not be teaching him how to do any magic at this point. Perhaps an hour of this a day, the rest of which will be devoted to basic studies such as reading, maths, and geography, with a high priority also on introducing him to Latin."

"I was thinking we might move supper a bit earlier so that Soren can have time after dinner to bathe, read, and unwind. He should be in bed between 7:30-8pm."

"Yes, I agree. I will make sure Tinny has food prepared tomorrow at six."

Soren scowled but didn't dare to offer his opinion on that.

After dinner, Snape cleared the table and sent Soren to bathe and get ready for bed. Marie took him upstairs and helped him fill the tub.

"Are you able to bathe yourself or do you need help?" She asked gently. With her wand, she filled the tub with bubbles and Soren smiled at her in delight.

"My mummy used to help me wash my hair."

"Why don't you get in the tub and play for a bit, and then I'll come back and wash your hair."

Opening the cupboard, she pulled out several unopened bars of soap, and transfigured each of them into a small bath toy, tossing them into the water. "Don't tell your father, it will be our secret." She winked at him and left him to play.

Twenty minutes later, she returned and helped him wash his silky dark hair, rinsing him gently so as not to get soap in his eyes. She helped him out of the tub and into a giant fluffy towel.

"Brush your teeth and get into your pajamas and I'll come back and read you a story before bed."

Marie went downstairs to find Snape sitting in his armchair, reading a book. "Did you say there was a library in the house, Lord Kent? I'd like to get a book to read to Soren."

"Yes. I meant to give you a full tour earlier— I apologize. We can do it tomorrow morning, but I'll show you to the library now." Snape closed his book and stood, Marie following directly behind.

When they walked in, Marie nearly gasped. The library was impressive- it had tens of thousands of books, stacked neatly on shelves that went all the way up to the 14 foot ceilings. There was a rolling ladder attached to a frame so that even the books on the highest shelves were accessible (not as important for people with magic, but very helpful for the muggles who had designed it).

"This is incredible."

Snape nodded. "Many of the books were here when I inherited the house, but I am constantly adding to the collection. I keep most of my magical texts in my study, and many of my scientific texts in the potions lab in the basement. You are welcome to borrow any of the books you see here, but if there's something specific you're looking for, let me know and I will acquire it for you."

"Thank you. Perhaps you can help me pick out a book for Soren? I'm sure he'd enjoy having you read to him some nights as well," Marie pitched subtly, knowing the boy was starving for positive attention from his father.

"I will leave that to you, Ms. Cloutier. But just know you are not obliged, he is perfectly capable of reading to himself in the evenings. It will be good practice for him."

"He's only seven, sir, I think most children that age enjoy being read to. It helps them relax and feeds their imagination." Marie had a lot more she wanted to say but she was trying to control herself, she was quickly realizing that this was a difficult man, and if she wanted to be successful she would have to be patient.

"In that case, I would choose one of the classics. Oliver Twist or David Copperfield for example. Perhaps reading books about less fortunate boys might serve as a subtle reminder of how lucky he is that he ended up in a manor house instead of a workhouse, lest he begin to indulge in self-pity."

"Oliver Twist is a wonderful idea, sir, we'll start there," Marie said, choosing to ignore the last comment. "Perhaps after reading some English classics, we can move on to some American ones. I'm sure he'd love The Adventures of Tom Sawyer."

"Let's stick to Dickens for now, Ms. Cloutier, I wouldn't want him to get any bright ideas. Tom Sawyer is one of the most misbehaved boys in all of literature."

Marie wasn't sure if he was being serious or not until she saw a slight edge of the man's lip curl upward, and she gave a little chuckle. She was also impressed that he knew his muggle literature. Not many wizards were familiar with the books, but she could tell this man, despite being of some privilege (and probably from an important wizarding family), was an avid reader. "I loved those books as a kid, Tom Sawyer was my absolute favorite."

"And did it inspire any naughty behavior on your part?" He raised an eye-brow in mock sternness.

"I only played hooky from school a few times…unlike Tom, I was smart enough not to get caught." She gave him a mischievous grin.

Snape tutted at her. "Tsk tsk tsk, you would not have gotten away with that in my class, Miss Cloutier. I look poorly on students skiving from their studies. Any student skipping my class could expect to serve several very unpleasant detentions."

Marie laughed out loud at the thought of it. "Yes, I can't imagine you'd let students get away with very much. It's probably a good thing you were never a teacher, then, I can't imagine you'd have the constitution for a room full of rowdy children. I'm a pretty patient person, and even I have a hard time with it sometimes."

"The key, Ms. Cloutier, is a firm hand and a good dose of fear and intimidation. It can go a long way to keeping unruly children in line."

"I must have missed that lesson during my education degree," Marie countered.

"Yes, you must have. An unfortunate result of skipping class instead of showing dedication to your studies." He made sure to sound extra patronizing, but he was enjoying this little repartee.

"And yet somehow I managed to turn out all right in the end. I came away with almost all O's on my N.E.W.T.s."

"Almost?"

"I got an "E" in Divination and Charms. But I was still top of my class at Beauxbatons."

"Which is precisely why I selected you." Snape looked at her briefly before striding across the library and pulling a book from one of the shelves. "Here we are, Oliver Twist. This edition even has a few pictures in it," he said, flipping through it gently. "Make sure Soren takes good care of it, I do not take kindly to people who mistreat books. If I find he has creased or torn any pages, he will lose the privilege of borrowing in future." He glared at Marie, making it clear that their banter was over and that the message was for her as well.

"I'll make sure it is returned in pristine condition, sir."

"See that you do." He handed the worn, leather bound book to Marie. "And remind Soren that lights are out at 8pm, and he is not to leave his room for any reason."

"Maybe you can go up and say goodnight to him just before lights out. I'm sure he would appreciate a tuck-in from his father."

"I think not, Ms. Cloutier. If I have to come up to his room at any point near bedtime, it will not be for pleasant reasons. I shall leave the nightly tuck-ins to you."

"Very well. Goodnight, Lord Kent."

"Goodnight."

With the book in hand, Marie returned upstairs, smiling to herself. She didn't know why, but something about the man intrigued her. That whole conversation in the library had given her butterflies in her stomach, it felt both dangerous and intimate, somehow. She wanted to hate him, and she certainly was not a fan of the way he parented Soren, but she couldn't help wanting to earn his approval. What is wrong with you! The man is a beast. Except there was something kind of hot about how he carried himself with authority and intelligence. She didn't know much about his background, but she was sure he was a smart and powerful wizard, she could just sense it, somehow. But she reminded herself she was only here for one reason, well, two maybe. She needed the money, and there was a little boy without a mum who desperately needed her attention and affection. Focus.

Chapter Text

After finishing two chapters of Oliver Twist, Marie marked the page with a quick spell and closed the book, laying it down gently on the bedside table. 

“It’s time for bed now, Soren. We’ll pick up where we left off tomorrow night.”

“Just one more chapter, please?” Soren begged Marie, pulling on her arm gently and giving her his most pleading eyes and charming smile. He absolutely loved being read to, snuggled up in his big, comfy bed with his rabbit and his new governess who was quickly becoming his most favorite person in the entire world. Even if he had only known her for a few hours, he was already completely smitten with her. She was warm and affectionate and he was desperate for someone to care for him. After several terrifying weeks of being alone in a filthy room with his dying mother, then being shuffled around with social services, only to end up in a cold, dark manor with a father who had somehow made him feel even more alone and scared, it was the first time he’d felt safe in months. “Can you stay a little longer and sit with me? Pleeeeasseeeeee?”

Marie stood up from the bed and tucked him tightly into the covers, running a hand across his forehead, combing the stray hairs of his fringe to the side. “It's nearly 8 o’clock, Soren. That’s your bedtime, and I don’t think either of us would like to see what happens if your father finds us upstairs playing around after lights out. I’m just across the hall, you know if you need anything you can always come get me. Do you have your rabbit?”

“Yes, he’s right here.” Soren lifted him up for her to see. 

“Does rabbit need a goodnight kiss?” Marie asked sweetly.

Soren nodded and she gave the bunny a quick squeeze and a peck on the head before handing it back.

“Now be a good boy and stay in bed. We have our first day of class tomorrow, so you’ll need your rest. Have sweet dreams.” Marie bent down and gave him a matching kiss on the forehead. 

On her way out, Marie swished her wand extinguishing all of the lights. Before she left, she made sure there was a small light still burning in his bathroom in case he needed it in the night. 

She closed the door gently behind her and went to her own room to take a nice long bath and get an early night of sleep. 

As he did every night, Snape retired to his study to read and write, occasionally indulging in a nightcap. He sat at his desk with his journal open, staring at the blank page before him. 

His thoughts, which were normally controlled, organized and well-compartmentalized, were all over the place. When he reflected back on the last few days, it seemed incomprehensible that his life could change so drastically, so quickly. It still didn’t feel real. 

He missed his solitude, and he was nowhere close to coming to terms with the fact that not only was there a small boy living in his house, but that boy was his son. And he was a father. A father.

The word rose like bile in his throat, burning and bitter, and filling his entire body with nausea. For years he had blocked out any thoughts of his own father, an abusive and violent man who filled his childhood with constant pain and terror. He had worked hard to leave all of that behind him, reinventing himself when he left home for Hogwarts and never looking back, leaving his inner child cowering in some deep, dark, corner of his subconscious where he planned to keep him, locked away for all eternity. 

But despite his best efforts, those images and feelings were flooding back to him. He never wanted to be a father, in fact he promised himself when he was young that he would never, ever bring a child into this world and risk passing on the generational trauma that still lived deep in his bones. He hated himself for allowing this to happen, for being thoughtless and reckless and weak…how could he possibly have allowed another unwanted and deeply troubled child to come into the world knowing they would spend the rest of their life suffering and miserable. You’re not only a coward, you’re a selfish fool. 

Picking up his quill, he attempted to empty his thoughts onto the blank pages in front of him, but his hand stalled, paralyzed. While his mind wandered, the ink spread on the page until it pooled, seeping through the expensive parchment one layer at a time, mirroring the emotions and memories that were now flooding out of the deepest recesses of his mind, powerless to stop them from spilling over and making a mess. 

Finally he snapped out of it and regained control of his fingers, lifting them from the page and tossing the quill onto his desk angrily before banishing the ink and sitting back in his chair as he pinched the bridge of his nose. He erupted out loud. “Damn you, Severus. How could you be so incredibly stupid! How could you let this happen!”

Standing from his desk, he walked to the bar cart in the corner where he kept his collection of fine whiskeys, brandies, and ports. He paused for a moment and debated whether to pour himself a glass. He knew it wasn’t the healthiest way to cope, but he was beyond rational thinking at this point. 

He picked up the cut crystal decanter in the back, lifted the stopper and inhaled the complex aromas of his most expensive single malt before pouring it generously into his Waterford crystal tumbler and skulking over to the giant window that overlooked his gardens. It was dark, but the moon was bright and nearly full, and he could see some of his night-blooming plants shimmering in the distance. It was beautiful. He loved it here. It was the first time in his entire life he had known peace and tranquility and could just do as he pleased, every day. It was the happiness he felt like he deserved after everything he’d been through; the pain and suffering of his childhood followed by the bullying and abuse he’d endured during his school years, and finally the hell of having the weight of the entire wizarding world on his shoulders while he played the impossible role of spy, professor, protector, and hell, even Headmaster in the worst of circumstances. It felt like a lifetime ago. 

With each sip, the smoky, smooth liquid reminded him that he was still here, that this was not a dream—or rather a nightmare— that he could escape from. He tried to convince himself that this was not the end of the world, and he would find a way. After all, if there was one thing Severus Snape could always count on himself to do, it was survive. Even if it was fueled by pure spite and vitriol, he always found a way to survive. That being said, he was tired…tired of having to get up again and again and start all over. And he was pretty sure being forced into fatherhood was a great deal more terrifying and loathsome than anything he ever had to do as a triple agent and a spy. 

He swigged the last few sips of whiskey in a single gulp, savoring the burn as it tore through his throat and scorched his stomach. There was something satisfying in the discomfort, it was one of the only feelings he allowed himself because it was so familiar… comforting, even in its predictableness. Pain he could tolerate, he understood it, believing it made him stronger. Everything else he felt, however, was a burden and completely unwelcome.

Once the alcohol hit his bloodstream and his nerves were calmed, he sat down again at his desk to write. It only took him a minute, but he poured some of his deepest feelings onto the page. Before he finished, he paused for a moment before he composed a small promise to himself and the boy…a sacred vow. 

When he finished writing, he tore the page from his journal and folded it neatly three times. He tapped it with his wand and it glowed momentarily before he tucked it into his chest, immediately trying to banish it from his memory. 

Soren laid quietly in his bed, holding his rabbit and listening to the sounds of the old manor. It had been a few hours since he’d heard Marie’s door close and he was fairly certain she hadn’t come out again. He’d also heard the unmistakable sound of his father’s hard soles striking each step with authority as he made his way up the stairs and into the East wing. But that had been ages ago, and he was pretty sure everyone was now settled in their rooms, asleep.

His heart raced slightly as he climbed out of bed, grasping his rabbit tightly as he tiptoed toward his wardrobe. The door groaned when he opened it and he froze, hoping no one would hear him out of bed. But the house stayed quiet. 

He reached deep into his wardrobe and pulled out a well-worn cloth bag and rummaged through it slowly until he felt what he was looking for… the long, slender, smooth spruce of his mother’s wand. He had stashed it when the muggle authorities had come to collect him, hidden inside the seam of his bag as his mother had instructed him to do. Before she died, she had tried to teach him a few basic spells. Most children his age were way too young to access or control their magic, but he had surprised her. For a boy of 7, he was impressive.  And she told him, whatever happened to her, not to let anyone take the wand from him, to keep it safe. It was the last way she knew how to protect him and it was all he had left of her. 

His father’s words of warning from dinner echoed in his ears, but he didn’t care, he promised his mother he would always have the wand with him and keep it safe. As long as he didn’t tell anyone, no one would know, and they couldn’t take it away. He would just be very very careful to keep it hidden. 

Crawling back into bed, wand in hand, he held it close to his face and breathed it in, searching for a hint of his mother’s perfume or hand cream soaked into the wood. But there was nothing.    

Clutching it tightly in his right hand, he whispered “lumos,” bracing himself as a beam of light burst forth from the tip of his wand, filling the room with an intense white glow. He was quite impressed with himself, it was brighter than he ever remembered it being before. “Look rabbit, I can still do it!”

He waved the wand around as he watched the shadows of his furniture dance around the walls before he whispered “Nox,” plummeting the room back into darkness. He repeated this a few more times before he finally gave into temptation and tried another spell. 

Grabbing the small cup from his bathroom sink, he set it on the bedside table as he attempted an Aguamenti, something his mother had struggled to do consistently and a spell he knew was definitely far beyond his level. He remembered the authoritative wand movements his father had done earlier that morning and he did his best to replicate them, swishing his wand decisively and whispering the incantation with confidence. After three tries, a thin but powerful jet of water came shooting out of his wand, knocking over his cup and covering his book and the table in a pool of liquid. 

“Oh no!” Soren panicked and lifted the book up, desperately trying to dry it with his nightshirt, but the pages were soaked through. He ran to the bathroom to grab a towel to wipe the table before replacing the book, hoping it would dry overnight. 

He tiptoed back to his wardrobe and hid the wand in his bag, sliding it between the lining. He moved the bag to the very back of the wardrobe before closing it quietly and climbing back into bed, shivering slightly now that his nightclothes were damp. He wrapped the blankets tightly around him and hugged his rabbit to his chest, closing his eyes and drifting off to sleep.

Marie woke early and got herself ready before going in to wake Soren, not wanting either of them to be late for breakfast. 

Soren was groggy from his late night but he allowed Marie to comb his hair and help him get dressed, sliding Snape’s shrunken sweater over his head before putting his hair back into place. She glanced at her watch, they still had 10 minutes before breakfast and she breathed a sigh of relief. 

“Why don’t we go ahead downstairs. Do you have everything you need?”

“Yep!” Soren replied, taking her hand and heading toward the stairs.

In the parlor, Snape was sitting, drinking a cup of tea and reading the Daily Prophet. It was one of his guilty pleasures, he enjoyed keeping up with the Wizarding news, even if it meant little to him now. He looked up when he heard giggles on the stairs.

“Go ahead and greet your father, say good morning,” Marie whispered into Soren’s ear. 

Snape folded the Daily Prophet and put it on the table beside him.  “Good morning.”

Soren let go of Marie’s hand and skipped over to his father’s armchair. “Good morning, Father!” He said, smiling and hopeful for a pat on the head or kind word. 

Snape raised an eyebrow. “Feeling chipper this morning, I see. I do hope you’ll be able to contain your energy whilst you are in class today. I don’t want to hear anything but a glowing report from Ms. Cloutier at supper this evening. Now sit down and compose yourself.”

“Yes, sir.” Soren’s smile slowly faded and he sat down by Marie on the sofa.

“Did you sleep well, Ms. Cloutier?” Snape asked, taking a sip of tea. 

“Yes, very well, thank you. I was so exhausted from organizing everything yesterday, I nearly fell right to sleep!” Truthfully, Marie had slept terribly, the first day jitters causing her to wake several times in the night, afraid she would oversleep or otherwise make a mistake on her very first day, but she didn’t feel it was pertinent to share that. She wanted to project confidence.

“It’s nearly 8, we can relocate to the dining room. Do you take coffee or tea, Ms. Cloutier?” 

“Coffee would be wonderful, thank you.”

Snape nodded and stood up from his chair, smoothing his hands down his frock coat as he walked in the direction of the dining room. 

“I want tea with my breakfast.” Soren piped in, following behind his father and speaking loudly so he would be heard. 

Snape stopped abruptly and turned to look at him, disapproval etched deep into the lines on his face. “First of all, you do not speak to my back. If you wish to say something to me, you will wait patiently until you are able to present yourself in front of me and I acknowledge you. Secondly, I do not remember asking you. Speaking out of turn is incredibly rude— do not do it again. However, next time, should you feel the need to make an unsolicited request, you will address me properly and ask politely:  ‘Please, sir, may I have a cup of tea?’…Have I made myself clear?”

Soren’s face turned a deep red at the harsh admonition and he had to blink back a few tears. He nodded his head and quickly wiped his hand across his eyes before speaking quietly. “Please, sir, may I have a cup of tea with breakfast?”

Snape kept his face impassive. “No, you may not. You seem to have quite enough energy this morning. Unless Ms. Cloutier wants to pull you down from the walls this morning, I would be doing her a great disservice to fill you with sugar and caffeine before you begin. You may have a cup of tea in the afternoon when you’re finished with school.” He turned around and continued walking toward the dining room, standing behind his chair while he waited for everyone else to arrive at the table. 

“Yes, sir.” Soren mumbled. 

“Ms. Cloutier, it is becoming more and more obvious to me that my son has not had anyone to teach him basic manners. I would appreciate it if you would take every opportunity to point out his mistakes and correct him, it is becoming quite tiresome for me.” Snape sat down in his seat at the head of the table, slipping his napkin into his lap. 

As they had done last night, Marie sat on his right, and Soren on his left. 

When everyone was seated, Snape tapped the table with his wand and the food Tinny had prepared for them appeared on the table. “Tinny, Ms. Cloutier will have coffee, and I would like another cup of tea, if you please.”

“Yes sir, Tinny will bring that right out!”

“Ms. Cloutier, please serve yourself first,” Snape said, mostly for Soren’s benefit. “Soren, as the youngest, you will wait until everyone else has been served before you make your own plate. You will also eat some of the spinach and tomato omelet that Tinny prepared especially for you. It is filled with iron and Vitamin C.”

“Yes, sir,” Soren said, patiently waiting for his father to finish serving himself before he made his plate. He wasn’t the biggest fan of spinach, but hopefully it wouldn’t be too bad mixed in with the egg. 

Breakfast carried on largely in silence for the first few minutes. Snape ate very little, mostly drinking his tea and having just a bit of toast with jam. He normally didn’t make a big production of breakfast, but he wanted to establish a routine, and most of all, he wanted to make sure that Soren was eating properly.

“May I ask what your lessons will be this morning, Ms. Cloutier?” Snape asked. 

Marie took a sip of water to wash down her bite of eggs before she replied. “Yes, of course! I thought we’d start out simple today, and let Soren tell me what kind of lessons he’s done in the past. We’ll do some reading comprehension and writing, and then some spelling and grammar. We’re going to do some word puzzles, and then move on to basic math later this afternoon.”

She left out that her math lesson would be fun and practical. She would set-up a play kitchen and have Soren bake some cookies, but before that, he would have to read the recipe, visit her pretend store to buy the ingredients, count the pretend money, and then learn how to do the measurements. It was a wonderful way to assess reading comprehension, learn how to follow directions, plan out a shopping trip, identify different denominations of currency, and then learn units of measurement. It was a fun way to learn, but she had no doubt that Lord Kent would likely never approve. 

Snape redirected his attention to Soren. “You will give Ms, Cloutier your full attention today. I will quiz you about what you learned at dinner. And put more eggs on your plate, that’s not nearly sufficient.”

Soren wasn’t particularly hungry, he was feeling a bit anxious now, but he took another sliver of omelet and put it on his plate, trying his best to choke down a few more bites until his father seemed satisfied.

When they reached the end of their meal, Snape set his silverware appropriately on his plate and cleared his throat gently. 

“Very well, I shall see you again at 12:30pm for lunch. Soren, wash your hands and face and brush your teeth before you go to the classroom. Your new clothes should arrive this afternoon. Starting from tomorrow, I will expect you to wear your school uniform, with a tie and a jacket. I want you to treat your time in the classroom with respect. It may be in our home, but for you it is school, and when you walk through the door of your classroom, your mentality will be as such. And do not be late. Your bottom will be in that chair before the clock strikes 8:45. No excuses.”

“Yes, sir, I will.”

Snape nodded. “Work hard, I have high expectations for you. You do not want to disappoint me.” 

He turned his attention back to Marie. “Best of luck to you, Ms. Cloutier. If you need anything, have Tinny come get me.”

“Thank you Lord Kent. Please don’t worry about Soren at all, we will have a wonderful day, I’m sure of it.  We’ll see you at lunch.”

Snape wiped his mouth briefly and then set his napkin on the table before escaping to the dungeon to brew. It would be the first time in days he would get to enjoy some time alone doing his work. 

Marie could tell Soren was feeling anxious now, biting the inside of his cheek, the confident smile on his face from this morning had now vanished completely. 

“Come along Soren, there’s nothing to worry about, we’re going to have fun today.”

“But I’m not very good at school. I don’t want to do bad and have my father be angry with me.”  Soren frowned and let his head drop down, hiding the tears that were filling his eyes. 

Reaching out for his hand, Marie brought him close to her, bending down to look in his big dark eyes, wiping the tears that were collecting in his thick lashes. “I will not let that happen. School is for learning, if you already knew everything, you wouldn’t need to go. All of us have a lot to learn, even when we become grownups. Your only job is to learn how to enjoy learning, so that way it is something you will continue for the rest of your life. It might be hard at first, but we’re not in a rush, and it's my job to help you. Now, go brush your teeth and wash your face, and I’ll see you in the classroom soon, OK?”

Soren nodded. “OK.”

Both Marie and Soren were in the classroom well before their 8:45am start time. Marie was getting her own notes and lessons organized and Soren was sitting at his desk, patiently waiting for her to begin. 

When the clock struck 8:45, Marie called Soren over to her. “I want to start just by finding out more about what you were learning before. Why don’t we go sit in our reading area and we can talk through it.”

Soren was just about to ask “what reading area?” When Marie pulled out her wand and transfigured several objects into an adorable little reading nook. Snape had included a small bookshelf for his classroom, filled with different books, but now Marie had added a colorful soft blue rug and two bean bag chairs. 

“Take a seat,” Marie gestured, watching Soren’s face light up when he saw the bean bags. 

“I’ve never seen a chair like this!” He said, giggling as he plopped into it and it moved around. “This is so cool!”

“I find a comfortable reading place to make a big difference.” She joined him on the floor, settling into the big red beanbag chair opposite him. “Now then, I’d like you to pick out a book you’d like to read to me. Whatever you like from the bookshelf.”

Marie had actually made sure there were several options for him to choose from, books ranging from simple toddler books, up to chapter books. So hopefully she would get a sense of what levels he was reading at, without him feeling any pressure. 

Soren shook his head slightly. “I don’t want to. I can’t read that good.”

“The proper grammar, Soren, is ‘I don’t read very well,” that can be confusing but we’ll learn more about it in our lessons later. And it doesn’t matter at all, I just want you to try your best. Pick a book you're comfortable with and give it a try. It’s just me, I’m not going to be upset no matter what. Let’s start at the beginning then, do you know all of your letters?” Marie asked gently. 

“Yes…I think so.”

“Wonderful! Let’s play a fun game then. I’m going to draw out a letter, and I want you to give me a word—any word— that begins with that letter. Do you want to try that?”

Soren was nervous but nodded his head. 

“Great!” Marie stood up and tapped the wall above the reading nook, turning it into a chalkboard. With a piece of chalk, she wrote out the letter A. “What letter is this?”

“Um, it’s an A,” Soren said.

“It is, well done. Now can you think of a word that starts with A?”

Soren thought for a minute before he said “Animal”

“Very good! Let’s write that now.” She carefully wrote out the rest of the word. “Can you tell me what letters spell animal?” 

One by one, she pointed at the letters, and Soren was able to get them all correct. “That’s perfect, Soren, really great job!”

Feeling a little more confident, they continued like this through the alphabet, Marie prompting him at each step until he was smiling again. 

“See? You know your letters very well, so now I want you to pick a book—any book you like, it can be a small book or a big book, it can have lots of pictures and a few words, or lots of words and a few pictures. It doesn’t matter, just a book you like from the shelf.”

Soren stood up and browsed around the reading nook, looking for a book he thought he could read.  Finally, he picked one. “I want to try this one.”

“Great, let’s sit back in our beanbag chairs and you can read it out loud to me.”

Soren took the book and sat down.

“Start by reading me the title.”

“I don’t know what the first word is,” Soren said, panicking slightly at the realization that he couldn’t even read the first word of the title. He had chosen the book because there was a boy who looked about his age on the cover, and it didn’t look like it was too long. 

“Let’s sound it out. It is a little confusing because this isn’t a word, it’s a person’s name. But we can still sound out the letters. What is the first letter and what does it say?”

They continued like this until they painfully made it through all of the letters and finally had the title: Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.

It took nearly half an hour for them to get through the book, and it was very clear to Marie that Soren was going to need a lot of help when it came to reading. Since this would be at the base of a lot of what they did moving forward, she would put a lot of her energy into practicing this with Soren each day. 

After an uneventful lunch, Marie took Soren back upstairs to settle him in for his “quiet hour.” 

Soren didn’t fight it, his late night and a morning “at school” had left him beyond tired. He sat on the edge of the bed and let Marie take his shoes off before climbing into the covers. When he was settled, he reached over to his night stand and picked up Oliver Twist, the pages now dry but visibly crinkled although he hoped no one would notice. “Here, read me another chapter in the book— I really want to know what happens next!”

Marie was about to respond when Snape’s deep voice echoed from the doorway. “No, she will not, this is her break as well. And that is not how you speak to Ms. Cloutier or any adult, she is not your playmate, she is your governess and if you want something, you will ask her politely and with respect.” He glared down at Soren as he walked toward the boy and clicked his fingers loudly, pointing at the bed. “Lay down and stay quiet. Tinny will fetch you when it is time to get up and get ready for class.” He grabbed the book from Soren’s hands and set it down on the nightstand without looking at it.

Soren obeyed immediately, pulling the blankets over him, sulking and refusing to look up at his father.

“Really, Lord Kent, I don’t mind, it might —“

Snape snapped his head and turned his attention to Marie, staring at her, cutting her off mid-sentence with a look of reproof. “This hour is as much for your benefit as his, Ms. Cloutier, do not indulge him. Additionally, you should not allow him to speak so informally with you. Perhaps I have not made my expectations clear, but you are responsible for teaching him proper manners and behavior, which he should be employing at all times. If you are remiss to correct him, I will be forced to do so myself, and I highly doubt either of you will be happy with my methods.”

Soren didn’t like seeing his father scolding his governess, and he propped himself up on his arms with an angry look on his face ready to defend her. He was about to open his mouth when Snape turned back around to face him, his index finger pointing sternly at his face.

“Don’t. Even. Think. About. It.” 

Soren quickly closed his mouth, but he let his face telegraph his displeasure. 

“And wipe that impertinent look off your face at once. I will not tolerate disrespect from you in any form, certainly not in your words, but not in your face, your actions, or your dramatic sighs either. That’s enough.”

Soren attempted to put on a neutral face, but his eyes were still narrowed and even though he didn’t say a word, he fell back dramatically in his bed, clearly still seething with anger. He grabbed his rabbit, crossed his arms and turned away from his father hoping he got his point across.  

“You would do well to sleep. Perhaps a good nap will cure you of your petulant attitude. If not, we can address it in my study after supper. This is your final warning.”

With that, Snape swooped his wand through the air, darkening the room as the thick curtains all fell simultaneously to cover each of the windows. “Ms. Cloutier, follow me please.”

Marie put a gentle hand on Soren’s head and whispered “Get some rest, I’ll see you in a bit,” before following the intimidating man out of the room. She was a grown woman, she had no reason to be nervous, but sometimes the way he spoke to her made her feel like an errant child. Her stomach did flop-flops as she closed Soren’s door quietly behind her, anxious for the conversation that would follow. 

When they were both standing in the hallway, Snape clasped his arms behind his back and stood to his full height. He paused for a moment before he began. “Ms. Cloutier, I know it is your first day, so I will be lenient with you as well. However, I expect more of an effort. I am paying you handsomely to meet my rigorous expectations, whether or not you find them silly or absurd. I know you think you’re being kind by coddling Soren and acting as his friend, but you are doing him a great disservice. If he is not taught to speak and behave properly, whether I am there or not, he will inevitably find himself confused and prone to making mistakes. My threshold for tolerating this from him is diminishing rapidly. He will learn quickly, one way or another. So if you prefer that he learns this from you rather than from me, you would do well to take on this part of your job with more attention and care.”

Marie’s face betrayed her, the man’s lecture, while delivered in a cool tone and without malice, had made her feel small. She took her professionalism very seriously, and she certainly didn’t want to make things any harder for Soren. “I’m sorry Lord Kent, I will make sure I do better.”

“See that you do. I’m certain you would feel quite badly if Soren were punished due to your own lack of consistency.” Snape took a moment to stare at her disapprovingly while he let that sink in, and then, without another word, he turned abruptly and walked toward the stairs. 

Without thinking, Marie’s emotions got the best of her and she blurted out after him. “Or you could stop being so unreasonable and try to be a bit more patient with him. He’s only 7, you know, all of this is new, and it’s a lot for a little boy. Especially after all he’s been through. He can’t be expected to meet your impossible standards overnight, no one could. Honestly, it feels like you’re setting both of us up for failure and it’s completely unfair. Maybe you should make more of an effort.” She crossed her arms and glared at him, satisfied she had sufficiently made her point. 

Snape paused with his hand on the bannister, feeling his emotions flare and giving them a moment to settle back again before he made his move. He did not like to be openly challenged or disrespected, ever, but he knew he had to tread carefully if he wanted to keep Marie here. That being said, he knew he had to nip this behavior in the bud, he certainly didn’t want her to think she could talk back to him every time she disagreed, they were not equals, she worked for him. This was his house, he dictated the terms, and if she wanted to keep her job, she would need to fall in line. He took a breath, closed his eyes, and turned around, hardening his face as he walked brusquely back toward the pretty blond, whose arms were now clenched in fists at her side, a gesture he’d seen from her once before when he knew she was clearly displeased with him. 

In a stern but low voice, he made an effort to address her calmly. “Ms. Cloutier, I suggest you take this time and have a nap as well. I find a good sleep is quite effective for curing naughty young children of their emotional outbursts, so I imagine it will be equally beneficial for you. As always, you are free to express your concerns to me—respectfully— however, I ask that in future you request to speak to me in the evening after Soren has gone to bed. There will be no more shouting your grievances down the hallway outside of his bedroom.” With that, Snape swished his wand, casting a silencing spell around them.  

Marie could feel the heat rising on her neck, his patronizing tone had shifted the power dynamic even further and despite the fact he had not resorted to threats or angry words, he had effectively put her in her place and made her feel powerless and slightly ashamed. 

Snape tilted his head to the side and raised an eyebrow before clasping her doorknob and opening the door to her room, gesturing for her to go in. “You’re a grown woman, Ms. Cloutier, and as such, I expect you to control your emotions and model good behavior and proper manners at all times. I do hope I don’t need to remind you again. If you are incapable or unwilling to meet my expectations— as ‘impossible’ as they may seem— you are welcome to resign. However, I am hopeful that a small rest will go a long way to improving your feelings on the matter.”

Dumbstruck, Marie walked through her door before turning around, determined to have the last word and refusing to be talked down to. “As you so clearly pointed out, Lord Kent, I am a grown adult, so I can decide for myself if and when I’d like to rest, and I would appreciate it if you didn’t treat me like a child. Who the hell does he think he is?

Snape smirked slightly, amused that he was getting under her skin, but quickly composing himself before he responded. “Yes, I can see that…but just so we’re clear, Ms. Cloutier, let me assure you—“ he paused menacingly before he narrowed his eyes and bent down slightly, drawing his speech out dramatically. “You are benefiting greatly from the fact that you are an adult. Had you been a child who spoke to me in the manner that you have just now, you would be promptly sent to bed with tears in your eyes and a thoroughly smacked bottom.” He punctuated this with a clenched jaw and a signature raise of his eyebrow.

A look of complete horror flashed across Marie’s face as her ears burned with embarrassment. She was caught off-guard by his comment, unable to come up with a quick-witted response before he spoke again. 

“Have a pleasant rest, Ms. Cloutier. Do try to make the most of it.” And with that, Snape turned back toward the stairs, extremely pleased with himself and reveling in the fact he was walking away after delivering a verbal coup de grâce. 

Marie desperately wanted to slam the door and scream, but she wouldn’t dare give him the satisfaction of acting like the overtired little girl he was subtly accusing her of being. She hated the way he could make her feel this way while remaining completely calm and even nauseatingly polite. Condescending bastard. She sat on her bed and took off her shoes and socks, throwing the latter in the direction of her wardrobe just to get out some of her frustration. 

She groaned out loud and tossed herself back onto the bed. Eventually, she couldn’t help it, she allowed herself to settle in, slowly making her way under the cloud-like duvet.  If she was honest with herself, she was feeling exhausted and a bit tetchy, so maybe it would feel good to take a small kip. Not that she’d ever admit that was what she desperately needed. She closed her eyes and replayed the conversation over and over again, alternating between outrage and disgust, mostly at herself because as much as she wanted to hate that infuriating man, she was intrigued by him. What is wrong with you?

Chapter Text

Marie woke up feeling refreshed. She smiled to herself as she stretched out in her big, beautiful bed before the memories of her last conversation came flooding back to her. Her face flushed and she cringed before panic spread through her and she looked at her watch. Five more minutes.

Jumping out of bed, she glanced in the mirror before spelling her hair perfectly into place and ensuring her clothes were unwrinkled. She put on her socks and shoes quickly before hurrying out her door to the classroom. 

On arrival, Soren was sitting quietly in his seat, hands folded neatly on his desk. 

Marie gave him a warm smile. “Did you have a nice rest?”

Soren beamed back at her. “I didn’t want to get up, Tinny had to float me out of bed.” He giggled at the thought of poor Tinny pulling at his sleeves before finally levitating him out of bed. 

“Well, you look bright-eyed and ready to learn now. We’re going to have fun this afternoon!”

Dinner that evening was the first time Marie had seen her demanding employer since their little chat in the hallway after lunch. After a smooth afternoon of lessons, she’d taken Soren for a walk in the gardens where they’d enjoyed a full-hour playing and wandering around the magical hedge maze. 

At precisely six o’clock, Snape appeared in the dining room and the three of them sat down to eat. 

Soren was smiling and fidgeting slightly in his seat, swinging his legs excitedly back and forth under the table as he waited for his turn to make a plate. He had had a brilliant afternoon with Marie, and his endorphins were still rushing from running around in the maze. He had never seen anything like it, it was charmed to shift and change and he had squealed with delight each time a hedge suddenly grew in front of him, forcing him to change directions. 

“How was your first day of lessons?” Snape asked, snapping Soren back to the present, as he sipped from his goblet of red wine. 

“It was so much fun! We did maths and Ms. Cloutier taught me about decimals using muggle money!” He’d left out details about the pretend shopping trip they’d taken after his teacher had transfigured part of the classroom into an impressive play grocery store. “And tomorrow we’re going to do units of measurement, right Ms. Cloutier?”

Marie had just put another bite of chicken in her mouth, so she politely covered her lips with one hand while nodding and trying to hurriedly swallow her food. After a quick sip of water, she added, “We will. We’ll be working on counting and units of measurement for the rest of the week.”

“And how did he do, Ms. Cloutier?” Snape focused all of his attention on her, drawing her name out and clasping his hands neatly together on the edge of the table.

Marie felt her stomach flutter at his intense stare and she soon averted her gaze, instead locking eyes on the little boy across from her. “Soren was a brilliant student today. He worked very hard and I was impressed with his focus and how quickly he was learning. He’s an extremely clever boy, you should be very proud of him.”  

And it was true, mostly. Soren was clearly further behind than most magical children his age, but Marie was intent on making sure she said nothing but positive things in front of him, she wanted him to remain enthusiastic and she knew he was dying for his father’s approval. 

“Let’s see then, shall we?” Snape leaned back slightly, pulling his wand out of his sleeve and conjuring a small pile of British coins of various denominations in front of the little boy. “Tell me, Soren, how much money is on the table?”

Panic washed over the boy as the color drained from his face. He looked up at Marie and pleaded with her to save him but she just smiled and nodded at him with encouragement. Soren glanced back at the pile and stared, frozen for several long seconds. 

“Well, show me what you’ve learned. Start counting.” Snape crossed his arms, tapping his fingers on the outside of his wool-clad bicep with growing annoyance. 

Soren looked up briefly and shook his head. “I can’t…there’s too many.”

Marie was furious at the man but she was working hard to keep her face relaxed and encouraging, for Soren’s sake. “Just take them one at a time, Soren, like we did today. You can do it.”

Now Soren’s eyes were filled with tears. He turned toward Marie and shook his head again before burying his face in his hands. “I can’t!” He wailed.

Exasperated, Snape banished the coins from the table with an angry flick of his wand, ignoring his son’s tears and staring at Marie. “Do not lavish undeserved praise on him, Ms. Cloutier. It seems you both have a lot to work on. I expect to see an improvement by the end of this week.” He returned his wand to the inside of his sleeve, picked up his fork and knife, and set to work on his food with a slight scowl on his face. 

Marie nodded her head. She was livid that he had put the poor boy on the spot like that, destroying whatever tiny confidence he’d gained from their lesson today. But she wouldn’t give up, she was sure Soren would master this over the next few days and if Lord Kent wanted the boy to perform for him like a goddamn circus clown to prove he was learning, she’d make sure he was ready. She glanced over at Soren and tried to give him a reassuring look but he had his head down, still crying into his arms.

Snape took a sip of his wine before setting his glass down with a small thud. “That’s quite enough, Soren. Sit up properly and get control of your emotions. And finish your peas. I will not remind you again.”

Soren wiped the tears from his eyes with the back of his hand and stared down at his nearly empty plate before picking up his fork and stabbing at the few remaining peas. Once again, his father had sucked all of the joy out of him like a rogue dementor, leaving him feeling empty and hollow. 

“If there’s one thing I loathe more than failure, it is weakness and cowardice. I may be thoroughly unimpressed with your incompetence, but I can promise that nothing will disappoint me more than refusing to try.” 

“Yes, sir.” Soren said, putting the peas into his mouth as a few more silent tears slid down his cheek.

Pathetic, Snape thought to himself, his lip curling up in disgust. “You’re excused from the table. Go take a bath and prepare for bed.”

Soren pushed his chair back slowly, the sound of wood scraping on stone echoing loudly through the dining room as the little boy fled to his room.

Snape finished his meal in silence before dabbing at his mouth gracefully with the napkin and setting it down on the table. He looked over at Marie who was cutting the rest of her chicken with harsh, jagged strokes of her knife, doing her best to avoid exploding with rage.

He waited another moment for her to look up at him, but it was clear she was making a conscious effort to ignore him. Finally he spoke. “It is obvious that you disapprove of my actions this evening. While I hoped to make an impression on Soren, perhaps the most important lesson tonight was for you. Praise is like a drug for most children, and the more they get, the more they want. Undeserved praise is even more insidious, and it will do far more harm than good in the long-term, Ms. Cloutier. An inflated ego with nothing to show for it will make him ripe for bullying and will ultimately lead to a poorer sense of self. Instead of learning for the sake of mastering a skill, and for his own satisfaction, he will instead be trained to seek out praise. Think of how much more confident he will feel when he can prove to himself that he is capable of doing something. Then he won’t spend his life chasing constant validation from others, it is a fool's errand and a waste of energy.”

“I completely disagree. He’s still learning, and he needs encouragement right now. And you didn’t have to humiliate him like that at the table, it was cruel. Can’t you see how you destroyed his spirit?” Marie was indignant but working hard to keep the acid out of her voice.

Snape raised a slight eyebrow at her accusation. “I did no such thing. I asked him to demonstrate what he learned today after you heaped effusive laudations on him. I was under the impression he would sail through this task with ease. He did not, and now it is obvious to all of us that he needs to work harder. I did not mock his intelligence or berate him in any way, but I made my expectations clear. I gave him an opportunity to impress me, and instead, he humiliated himself by failing to even try. He will have a chance to redeem himself—and you—again at the end of the week.

 Is there anything else you wish to say?”

There was a lot Marie wanted to say, but instead she clenched her teeth and responded. “No, sir.”

“Very well. You may be excused.”

Marie wiped her face and folded her napkin on the table before getting up and quietly pushing her chair under the table. She had just turned to walk away when she heard his silky voice and turned around. 

“And for what it’s worth, I do appreciate you keeping your emotions under control in front of Soren, it appears that having a small rest earlier was of great benefit to you after all. Have a pleasant evening Ms. Cloutier.” 

Snape stood, gave a slight bow of his head and disappeared back into the dungeons. 

Once again, Marie was left speechless, unable to come up with a response before he had swept from the room. There was something in the way his tone changed. The stern, all-business, no nonsense look on his face had softened somewhat and the tiniest hint of amusement had flitted across his lips as he’d spoken to her. He was being patronizing, of course, but there was something more tender about it, a small inside joke shared just between them, a subtle tease. For a man who seemed completely humorless, it felt out of place and confusing. 

It took her a moment to realize she was still standing in the dining room, holding onto her chair and replaying his words, but she soon snapped back to reality and hurried up the stairs to check on Soren. 

As expected, he was a mess. Despite her reassurances and all of her effort, he remained dejected and tearful. Even bubbles and toys in his bath were met with a melancholic indifference that was painful to watch. Instead of playing, he washed himself quickly and changed into his pajamas without any of his usual chitchat. 

“Are you ready for Oliver Twist?” Marie asked as she dried his hair with the towel before running the comb through it gently, putting it in a nice side part. 

Soren shrugged his shoulders. “It’s OK, you don’t have to.” 

“Oh, Soren, please don’t be unhappy. I promise you we’re going to work hard and practice and you’re going to impress your father so much the next time.” They shared a look in the mirror before he pulled away and climbed into his bed. 

“I’m stupid. I told you I wasn’t good at school. Why did you have to tell him I was clever? Now he knows I’m dumb and he thinks you are a liar.” Soren grabbed his rabbit and buried himself in the thick duvet.  

Marie sat on his bed and tried to pull him closer. “That’s not true. He doesn’t think that at all. I promise. And you are extremely intelligent, but just like everyone, you have to practice when you learn something new. And we’ll practice together until you get it, I promise!”

“I don’t even care. I hate him.”

I don’t blame you, Marie thought, but she would never say that to Soren, as cold and harsh as the man was, he was still his father and the only family he had. She put her arm around him and pulled him closer. “Come here, let’s read together. Hold onto your rabbit and we’ll snuggle up and read, it’s about to get really good.”

Marie reached for the book and a stuck page nearly tore when she attempted to open it to her magical bookmark. That was when she saw the ink had smudged in places and the pages were wrinkled, crusted together, and obviously damaged. A small gasp escaped from her mouth. “Soren, what happened to your book?”

A guilty look crept onto Soren’s face. “I don’t know?” he lied. 

“This is not what the book looked like yesterday. I’m not mad, I just need to know so I can fix it. Did something happen? Did you spill something on it?”

There was no way he would tell her the truth, but he just nodded his head. “I was thirsty in the night and I spilled a cup of water, by accident. I’m sorry.”

“Oh no, Soren. This is one of your father’s books. He made me promise to take good care of it. I wish you’d told me right away, it would have been easier to fix it when it first happened.”

Soren’s face fell and he was about to burst out into another round of tears. “But it was the middle of the night. Father is going to be so mad at me! I’m going to be in so much trouble!” 

Marie wiped his tears and pulled him close to her. “Shhh, no Soren. Please don’t worry, don’t cry. I’ll figure out a way to fix it, I promise. And if not, I’ll take the blame for it. Don’t worry at all, I promise he’s not going to be mad at you, OK? It’s just a book.” Marie desperately tried to calm Soren before he went into another meltdown, but she knew Lord Kent would NOT be happy. Nonetheless, she wasn’t about to let Soren get in trouble for it, especially since it had been an accident. She could deal with the man. And maybe she could take care of it all and he’d never know. Although somehow she doubted it, there wasn’t much anyone got past the man. 

The tears and the long day had obviously taken their toll on Soren, and he fell asleep a good ten minutes before lights out. Marie closed the book quietly and cradled it in one arm, hoping she could try a few more spells to deal with the water damage before Lord Kent had another reason to complain. 

After tucking the sheets tightly around Soren, she tiptoed out of his room and shut the door quietly behind her. Standing in the hallway, she again had a flashback to her earlier conversation and she thought immediately to his little smirk this evening after dinner. Why was it getting to her so much? Why did she keep replaying that humiliating exchange that both enraged her and sent a small thrill through her. 

But just as quickly she thought about Soren and all of the negative feelings she had for Lord Kent returned abruptly. Any man capable of being so unkind to a small child was a horrible person, and she would do well to remember that. He was cold, stubborn, patronizing, and harsh— none of those were admirable qualities. 

As she reached for her door handle, she had a sudden urge to go downstairs and confront him about it. She played out the scenario in her mind while she hovered in the hallway in limbo…finally deciding it was best not to stir the hornet's nest any more today. She had a feeling her impulsivity would not be rewarded with understanding or reconsideration on his part, so she would have to fight her urge to be impatient and think through her strategy moving forward. 

The next few days continued, thankfully, with very little drama. Snape saw Marie and Soren at meals, but otherwise focused on his work in the dungeon and engaging as little as possible beyond small-talk and the occasional admonition. 

On Friday afternoon, Snape finished one of the potions he’d been working feverishly on all week and decided perhaps he should check in on the classroom after all. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Marie to do her job— he’d selected her knowing she was by far the most intelligent witch for the job, even if she was still struggling to get on board with the way he wanted things done. As for his son…he appeared to be turning out as dim-witted as his mother. It was regrettable, nonetheless Snape hoped with enough hard work and discipline, he might at least make a passable student at some point. Soren obviously hadn’t inherited his own talent for academics, but Snape refused to lower his standards. He was of the opinion that anyone with half a brain could succeed if they worked hard enough, so barring some legitimate disability, there were no excuses as far as he was concerned.  

Long before he got to the classroom door, Snape could hear the giggling and laughter from all the way down the corridor. He slowed his gait, listening intently as he softened his steps and approached the door, hoping to catch them off-guard. Was Marie, singing? 

He was about to burst in and demand an end to the play date, but when he listened more closely he heard her singing about the denominations of coins. And Soren’s small voice echoing after her. What on earth is she doing?

Wanting to remain hidden, he stood back in the hallway where he still had a view through the doorway but he was concealed in the shadows, watching as Marie used her wand to send large versions of the coins into the air, slowly sticking them up on the wall while Soren counted. When he got it right, she swished her wand and the coins shrank down and dropped into a piggy bank in the corner. 

“Fantastic work Soren, that’s 35 more pence in your bank! When we’re finished you can count it all out and decide what you’d like to buy from my shop!”

Soren was clearly delighted with himself. “I want the color-changing quill!”

“Are you sure? It might take a while to save up for that one. Maybe you can trade in some of your coins for a few of the moving stickers at the end of the day.”

“No, I want to save up for the quill. It’s so cool!”

Snape took this moment to step forward until he was staring at both of them ominously from the threshold. As usual, he cut an imposing figure when he pulled himself to his full height, clasping his hands behind him, and glaring down on them with a clenched jaw and narrow eyes. 

The air in the classroom seemed to drop several degrees as soon as he appeared and both of them froze as if they’d been hit with an immobulus. 

Snape couldn’t help but enjoy a moment of satisfaction. He’d always gotten a bit of sadistic pleasure in any situation where he found himself staring into the guilty eyes of a misbehaving student who knew they were caught. He relished watching the emotions flash across their faces as they realized they were in trouble they couldn’t get out of. It had been so many years since he’d been in this position and he’d forgotten just how much he enjoyed it. He savored their looks of shock and horror for another few seconds before he spoke, adding deliberately to the anticipation and drama. 

“What on earth is going on here? This boy is far enough behind as it is, I hardly think there’s any time for you to be playing these silly little games. This is supposed to be a classroom, not a crèche meant for entertaining toddlers.” Snape took several paces forward, looking down on the ground and sneering at Soren. “And you, get up off the floor and go sit at your desk, immediately.”

“It’s not silly games, I’m learning!” Soren shouted, lowering his voice immediately when he saw his father’s eyes flash dangerously at him. 

Snape clicked his fingers and pointed at the empty desk. “Sit down and be quiet. I was speaking to Miss Cloutier, not you. When it is your turn to give me an answer, you’ll know it. And don’t you dare speak to me in that tone again, or you will be a very sorry little boy.”

Soren slinked quietly over to the desk, not daring to look up at his father and hoping he wasn’t going to be in any worse trouble.

“Lord Kent, we were just trying some different methods for learning to count and add. There are some wonderful studies showing how engaging students using different techniques can actually help them learn better. I’m happy to share the articles with you, if you’d like.” Marie smiled, refusing to be intimidated in her own classroom.

When Snape hired her, he had promised her a certain degree of autonomy and respect for this space, even if he thought her methods were a waste of time. It was part of their agreement, but that didn’t mean she had carte blanche. “I do not want you to bribe Soren with money to learn what he is supposed to be learning. He should not feel like he deserves a treat for simply going to school and doing as he’s told. It’s absurd.”

Marie smiled confidently. “It’s not real money. It’s only a type of leprechaun gold that I’ve spelled to look like British coins. But by collecting them in his bank, Soren gets to practice counting it and learning how to save and spend it so he can earn rewards for his hard work. I’d hardly call that a bribe, they are just little trinkets and school supplies. There’s strong research showing the importance of positive reinforcement and goal setting, not to mention the life skills he’s learning on how to manage money.”

Snape scoffed. “That is hardly something he’ll need to concern himself with. Nonetheless, you will stop with this at once. Soren will do his work, at his desk, and the only thing he needs to concern himself with are the consequences he can expect if he does not do well in his studies.” He turned to stare down the boy who was looking suitably terrified. 

The older wizard paused for a minute before walking over to the reading corner, kicking one of the empty red beanbag chairs with his foot, a look of disgust on his face. “And I don’t know what you call these monstrosities, but they do not belong in a classroom or anywhere in the manor.” 

Before he could pull out his wand, Marie reached out and grabbed his arm. “Wait, please Lord Kent. I asked you to trust me, and you promised me that you would give me full reign over my classroom. I know my methods may differ from what you’re used to, but can you at least give Soren a chance to show you how much he’s learned this week?”

Snape looked down at where her hand was grabbing tightly to his forearm, dragging his eyes up to her with his jaw tightly clenched, pausing before raising an eyebrow in warning. 

Marie immediately removed her hand and whispered, “Sorry.”

“Please, Father?” Soren pleaded from his desk, bravely. “I like how Ms. Cloutier teaches, I’m learning a lot. I can count the coins now.”

“What have I told you about speaking out of turn? One more outburst from you and you’ll be counting smacks instead of coins,” Snape snapped, before returning his attention to Marie, letting out an exasperated sigh and reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose before he continued. “I will give you one chance to demonstrate the efficacy of your methods, but that is all. If, after this, I am not convinced, you will cease with all of this foolishness and teach him according to standard practice.”

“Of course, Lord Kent. Thank you.” Marie was confident in Soren and brought the porcelain piggy bank over to his desk, opening the small rubber stopper in the bottom and allowing the coins to fall into a compact pile on his desk. 

Soren sat up straight, clearly eager to show off what he learned.

“Go ahead, Soren, count out the money you’ve saved in your classroom bank.” Marie gave him a reassuring wink. 

Snape crossed his arms and stood over the boy, watching closely as he sorted the coins by denomination, counting each of them out loud. As he did so, Marie put the numbers on the board so he could add them all together. 

“Three pounds, forty-two pence,” Soren announced proudly. “The stickers are only 80 pence each, but I’m saving for the color-changing quill. It’s 8 pounds fifty, but if I keep working hard I can probably earn it in a few more weeks. 

“Well done, Soren, you did perfectly,” Marie encouraged, smiling at him. “Let’s put the coins back in the bank so we can save them.”

Snape pressed his lips into a hard line and paused before he responded. “You may continue, Ms. Cloutier, but if I see his performance falter in any way, we will return to more traditional methods.”

“Yes, Lord Kent, I understand. But I think if you give it a chance, you’ll be pleased with his progress. Thank you.

Snape gave a curt nod before turning to Soren. “Do not take advantage of this. You will continue to work hard.”

“Yes, sir…but I did good, didn’t I?” Soren looked up at him with hopeful eyes. 

“The correct phrasing of that question is ‘I did well, didn’t I?’ It is an adverb modifying a verb. Hopefully there will still be room for grammar on your syllabus somewhere, in between the song and dance.” Snape gave an unimpressed sneer toward Marie. “But to answer your question, yes, you completed the task adequately, just as I expected you would. Which is the only reason I’m allowing Ms. Cloutier to continue. However, that does not give you license to sit back and play all day, if you do not continue to progress in a way I am satisfied with, we will be doing things my way, do you understand?”

“Yes, sir.” Soren couldn’t help it, he smiled slightly. It wasn’t exactly the pat on the back he was hoping for, but at least his father seemed somewhat pleased. Well, perhaps not disappointed would be a better description. He ignored the ominous threat that seemed to be the only way his father knew how to motivate people. 

“And Ms. Cloutier, do be careful how much positive reinforcement you’re showering on him, as you can see he is already fishing for praise, just as I feared.”

Marie had to bite her tongue to stop herself from asking him why on earth he was so hellbent on depriving his son the slightest bit of encouragement. Instead she settled for a bit of passive aggressive sarcasm, delivered with her most innocent look. “I truly apologize, Lord Kent, I must have misunderstood you. I thought you warned me about too much undeserved praise. In my classroom, Soren will always be celebrated when he does great work. But I shouldn’t expect a man such as yourself to understand such complex ideas about child development and pedagogy if you’ve never spent time working with children. Which is why I always tell Soren, a truly intelligent person never stops learning!”

Not wanting Marie to have the last word, he returned the volley. “You make an excellent point, Ms. Cloutier, one is never too old to learn a lesson…Or, in my case, to teach one.” He gave her a pointed glare and his signature eye-brow raise before turning on his heel and walking toward the door, satisfied he’d left her a bit off-kilter. When he reached the door, he turned around one more time. “Oh, and Ms. Cloutier, as it is the end of the week, I am expecting a full report at the end of the day. You and I will meet to discuss it before supper. Please send Tinny to fetch me from my lab when you’re finished with your lessons and you’re ready to meet.”

“Yes of course, Lord Kent.” 

Snape looked over at Soren and hardened his face slightly, pointing a finger in his direction. “Behave yourself. If I hear anything I don’t like about your conduct in the classroom this week, you and I will have a far less pleasant discussion after supper.”

Soren’s mouth went dry before he nodded his head. “Yes, sir.”

And with that, Snape swept dramatically out of the room, his black robes billowing after him. 

It took a moment for both of them to shake-off the intrusion, and Marie broke the silence first. “You have nothing to worry about, Soren. I have only positive things to say. You’ve done really well so far, despite the challenging circumstances. Now then, shall we finish the day with some geography? I say we take a safari and check out the Serengeti, do you know where that is?”

A huge look of relief came over Soren and his smile returned. “No, but that sounds fun, I love animals!” 

Marie transfigured a small safari hat for him as the globe came flying off of the shelf, hovering in midair and spinning around. She enlarged it until it was nearly triple the size and taller than Soren. “Fantastic, this will be a fun lesson! Can you point to the continent of Africa on the globe?”

At the end of the day, Marie sent Soren off with Tinny to have tea and play in the garden. She was curious to check out the dungeons, so she figured it was the perfect excuse to walk down and seek out Lord Kent on her own. 

The air grew colder as she descended the winding stone steps. She kept her hand on the cold, damp wall for balance, and even though it was well-lit with sconces every few feet, it made her useasy. She paused midway down, wondering if she was making a mistake. While she’d never been explicitly told the dungeons were off-limits to her, Lord Kent had made it very clear that Soren was never allowed anywhere near here. She also knew the man preferred to be alone and didn’t like to be disturbed when he was down here…which was precisely the reason why she was so intrigued to see what was down there. 

When she finally reached the bottom of the stairs, the room opened up into a large potions lab. There were shelves lining the walls, every inch covered by jars and bottles of potions ingredients while several cauldrons of different sizes bubbed away in the center. Lord Kent was standing over one, head focused on the purple concoction in front of him, his back to Marie. 

“Were my instructions not clear, Ms. Cloutier, or were you looking for a reason to blatantly defy me?” He didn’t turn around, instead focusing on careful clockwise stirs with his right hand as his left hand poured in another liquid, drop by drop. 

“I’m sorry, Lord Kent, I—“

“Quiet. I need to concentrate. You can wait on that stool.” With both hands occupied, he nodded his head in the direction of a tiny wooden stool a few feet to his right.

For the next several minutes, Marie sat in silence, watching the man brew. As a student who had excelled in potions, she recognized his talent immediately. He was precise in every movement, and he carried an air of confidence that only came from knowing he was a true master of his craft. 

Before she knew it, she wasn’t just watching him brew, she was staring at him, paying attention to his body in a way she had never done before. Not just noticing, but appreciating his features. His long, lean, muscular legs. The chiseled angle of his jaw. His broad shoulders and the taut muscles of his upper arms. And his hands…she was fascinated watching his hands. They were masculine, but somehow delicate at the same time, and every movement of his lithe fingers showed incredible control and agility. He was sexy.

What the fuck, Marie. Why was she looking at him that way? He is not a good man and he’s your employer for God’s sake. Get a grip! She was engaging in a heated discussion with herself when the man tapped his stirrer twice on the inside of the cauldron before setting it down on the table and directing his attention to her.

“Well, now that you’ve had a few moments to sit in quiet contemplation, perhaps you can explain to me what was so difficult about following my instructions.” Snape crossed his arms and leaned casually against his workbench, glaring down at her, an eyebrow cocked in expectation. 

Marie could tell he was mildly displeased, but not angry. A week with the man and she was starting to learn the subtle spectrum of his voice and facial expressions that seemed to range from slightly irritated and unimpressed, to downright livid. This was somewhere closer to the former. 

What the hell is this, a stool for a Lilliputian? She felt a child with the man staring down at her on that tiny stool and using that infuriatingly patronizing tone. “Sorry. It was such a beautiful day out, I thought it might be nice for Tinny to take Soren to play in the garden for a bit so he could run around and get some of his energy out. I figured I could just come down and get you myself, I really didn’t think you would mind.” 

When his scowl deepend further, she put on her most contrite face and softened her voice. “I apologize, Lord Kent, really, I didn’t know you felt so strongly about this.”

“I gave you explicit instructions to ask Tinny to fetch me. He knows not to disturb me when I am in the midst of a complicated step in my brewing. You, on the other hand, nearly cost me a potion several months in the making. Not to mention the rare and expensive ingredients that might have been wasted. You’re lucky I’m such a competent brewer, had I lost count of my stirs and destroyed my potion, you would be packing your bags right now.”

Marie looked up at his face and realized he was not joking. “I really am sorry.”

“Are you, really?” Snape took a few steps toward her, towering over her on the stool. He clicked his tongue at her several times,”Don’t lie to me, Ms. Cloutier. I’m starting to think you get some kind of perverse enjoyment out of challenging my authority. That you get a thrill out of seeing just how far you can push me before I react. But let me make something very clear…” he leaned down so his face was uncomfortably close. “I will tolerate a lot of things from you, including your ridiculous teaching methods, but I have no desire to engage in these silly little power games with you. It ends now.”

“Games? I’m not playing games! I said I was sorry and I meant it, I honestly didn’t think it would be such a big deal…I swear.” Marie was adamant in her denial, but part of her wondered if he was right. Not consciously, of course, but perhaps there was some part of her that delighted in challenging him. You’ve lost your mind, Marie, that’s just sick.

He stared at her for a few more seconds debating whether he should belabor the point but decided against it, standing back to his full height. “Now then, the reason I asked to see you was so we could discuss Soren’s academic progress this week. As you can see, this space was not designed to entertain guests, so perhaps we should reconvene this conversation upstairs to the parlor where we can have some tea. Unless, of course, you prefer to remain seated on your little stool?” He drew his gaze downward and a hint of amusement flickered in eyes. 

Marie realized she must look ridiculous sitting there barely a foot off the ground with her ample ass hanging off both sides of it. She stood up quickly, blushing slightly. “I think I’ll be much more comfortable on the sofa, thank you.”

Snape smirked. “After you,” he said, gesturing to the stairs and following closely behind her, trying not to stare at the perfect curves that were now right at his eye level. “I hope your curiosities were satisfied, Ms. Cloutier, I would prefer it if you didn’t invade my private space again.”

“I won’t.” She glanced back at him over her shoulder pausing briefly on the stairs. “I’m sorry. I’ll make sure to follow your directions precisely next time.”

“Wouldn’t that make for a pleasant surprise,” he drawled. “Just in case, I’ll be sure to keep your stool available. Although perhaps I should reposition it in the corner. A naughty step in the middle of the room just doesn’t seem to have the same effect. Far too many distractions.”

Bastard. Rich of him to accuse me of playing power games, he is clearly enjoying this. Marie knew he was smirking, but she refused to let him have the satisfaction of seeing her flustered, again. When she reached the top of the stairs she paused to turn around again, making use of her position to look down on him for a change, her head held high and a confident smile on her face. “I think you’re quite right, the corner is a much more appropriate place for it. Although with your height, I’d be concerned about chronic back pain if you plan to spend much time there. But I think some time spent in quiet contemplation is a marvelous idea, perhaps you can reflect on how you might be a more supportive and loving father to your son before he grows up to despise you even more.”

Snape raised an eyebrow. “Careful, Ms. Cloutier.” His jaw tightened and his brow furrowed, and his tone had changed to that dangerously low register that she knew meant he had crossed from the “displeased” part of the spectrum to “anger.”  

Marie realized she had crossed a line with that last bit, but it was true, although she wished she’d waited for a better time (and way) to say it. She’d unwittingly used a moment of light-hearted banter and taken a strike, it was a low blow. Good, he deserves it. She opened the door at the top of the stairs and walked through to the parlor, the guilt now weighing on her more heavily. 

Without another word, Snape ascended the remaining steps, turning only to lock and ward the dungeon door with his wand. 

Normally Tinny would prepare the afternoon tea, but since he was outside playing with Soren, Snape went to the kitchen himself. Although he enjoyed the convenience of a house elf, he had spent most of his life preparing his own tea, and he found it to be an almost meditative exercise. 

He took his time, boiling the water in a kettle and then selecting a nice Earl Gray before arranging each piece of the tea service carefully on the tray, complete with several small biscuits and pastries. 

When everything was ready, he took the tray into the parlor, setting it down carefully on the coffee table. He moved slowly but deliberately, pouring each of them a cup before handing one to Marie and looking her straight in the eyes. After taking his own cup and sitting down in his armchair, he finally spoke. “I would like to discuss Soren’s academic progress. By this point I hope you have a sense of where he stands amongst his peers and any areas of concern. I want to know what we need to work on with the greatest priority.”

“His reading is quite far behind. He knows his letters, and there are some words he recognizes, but he is going to need a lot of practice reading. But truthfully, my biggest concern isn’t at all where he is academically…I’m more than confident that he’ll catch up, but I’m worried that he believes he isn’t clever. He’s convinced he is stupid.”

“Well, maybe he is.” Snape said dismissively, taking a sip of tea. “His mother was dreadfully dim-witted. And, you know what they say, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. I wouldn’t be surprised in the least if he’s a bit moronic or slow.” 

“Lord Kent! He is not, not at all. In fact, he has a fantastic memory and he’s made exceptional progress in a short amount of time, it’s his confidence that is slowing him down, not his intellect.”

Snape furrowed his brows as he took it in. “I see. So what you’re saying is that you do not believe his intelligence is a problem, but that the reason he is not progressing as quickly as he could is because he’s too stubborn to make more of an effort and is instead wasting your time by indulging in self-pity.”

Marie gave him an indignant look. “What? No! That is absolutely not what I’m saying at all! He is terrified of you, and he is convinced that you think he’s deficient somehow and you hate him, and it is affecting his ability to learn efficiently!”

Snape nearly rolled his eyes. “I saw him in your classroom, Ms. Cloutier. He was laughing and smiling and highly engaged. He was hardly trembling in terror, you’re allowing him to manipulate your emotions because you feel sorry for him.”

“Why is it so hard for you to just encourage him? A little bit. A simple “well done” today would have gone a long way in helping his confidence. Instead, he is so paralyzed by the fear of disappointing you that I often have to try to convince him to take on a new challenge by doing simple tasks with him to build him up first.”

“Exactly, he is being a stubborn, self-indulgent brat.”

“He’s not being stubborn, it’s developmentally appropriate behavior for a child who has been through a lot, lost his mother, and now had his life completely upended in a new environment where he doesn’t feel the least bit secure.” Marie was no longer hiding the vitriol in her voice. “I can’t do my job well if I don’t have your full support. Don’t you want Soren to be happy?”

“His happiness is inconsequential. It is my job as his father to ensure his needs are being met, that he gets an education, and he is prepared in every way to go out into the world as a successful adult. His happiness is his own prerogative. One should never allow their happiness to be dictated by the whims of others.”

“And what about his psychological and emotional needs? Those are equally as important as his physical needs, maybe even more so.”

Snape silently sipped his tea. “Well, I’m confident you’ll find a way to ensure they are adequately met. That is your speciality, is it not?”

Marie was in the midst of composing a scathing response when Tinny suddenly appeared in the middle of the parlor, distraught and panicky. 

“You need to come, quickly, Lord Kent!! Soren is in trouble, come quickly, come quickly!!”

“What is it, Tinny?” Snape asked, setting down his teacup and standing immediately. 

“It’s Soren, sir, he’s at the top of one of the tallest trees and he won’t come down,” Tinny said, his voice shaking. “I begged him to come down but he won’t.”

“Oh for Merlin’s sake.” Snape immediately stormed outside, slamming the door open and shading his eyes with a hand as he looked out into his back garden, Marie and Tinny quickly on his heels. 

Once he’d descended into the yard, Snape could clearly see his son sitting on a branch of one of the oldest and tallest trees on his property, at least 20 meters up. “How on earth did he get up there, Tinny.”

“He climbed, sir. Super fast. I saw him, and I told him not to go so high but he wouldn’t listen!”

“Soren, get down here right now!” Snape bellowed, his voice taking on his usual angry tone but louder, and with a new anxiety mixed in. “I mean it, young man. Get down from there immediately!!!” He took several more long strides toward the tree, his head craned backward, looking at the top of the highest branch where his son was perched, refusing to engage.

“We have to get him down from there immediately!” Marie exclaimed, terrified seeing the seven year-old sitting so high up. “Please, Lord Kent, you have to get him! He could fall to his death from there!”

“Get out your wand,” Snape clicked his fingers at her while he stared up, trying to do some important calculations in his mind. 

Marie hesitated. “I, um, I don’t have it on me.”

Snape whipped his head to her, his icy tone compounding his anger. “What? Why would you ever be without your wand? Are you insane? Do you know how dangerous that is?” 

“Please, just get Soren out of the tree, you can lecture me about my wand later. You need to get him down safely!”

Snape turned his head back toward the tree. “Oh, I will retrieve him, and when I do, he is going to be a very sorry boy.”

Marie cried out, her hands cupped around her mouth, “Please Soren, come down. We don’t want you to fall.” 

“No!” Soren shouted.

Without another word, Snape apparated to one of the thicker branches at the top of the tree. He could tell from the ground that the branch Soren was sitting on would never hold his weight, so he just hoped this one was as sturdy as it appeared to be from below. He carefully climbed up one more branch until he was about a meter below Soren. The boy was just out of reach but if he could convince him to lower his body down a bit, he could grab him and apparate both of them to the ground safely.  

“You are going to climb down here right now, so I can get us back down safely. Do you understand me?” Snape was simmering with rage, but he didn’t want to say or do anything to scare the boy, causing him to fall. When Soren ignored him, he realized he might have sounded too harsh and he adjusted his voice and softened his face. “Just ease yourself down toward the branch I’m standing on, I will catch you.”

But instead, Soren attempted to move further away, edging out further on the branch. “No, go away.”

Snape took a deep breath before trying again. “Soren, listen to me. Come closer to the trunk of the tree and I will help you down.” 

“I don’t want to come down. Leave me alone.”

Snape considered his other options, he could attempt to immobilize him and levitate him down, but he would have to let go with one hand to draw his wand, and he was afraid if he attempted to cast a spell, he might startle the boy. He softened his voice even further to a tone no other human being had heard in the last 30 years. “Please Soren, let me help you. I don’t want you to fall. I’m begging you.”

“You don’t care, you probably hope I’ll fall and die and then you won’t have to be my father anymore,” Soren shouted, scooting further down the thin branch. 

“That’s not true, I would never want you to get hurt. Please.” Snape was starting to realize he was never going to be able to talk the kid down, it was clear he was angry and didn’t trust him. He exhaled, his eyes pleading with Soren, all traces of anger gone, replaced with pure concern. “Soren, we can talk about all of this on the ground. Let me help you. Please.”

“No. Go away. I hate you.”

Slowly Snape started to readjust his grip so he could reach for his wand, and just as he did, the boy scooted another 6 inches away, the branch snapping underneath him. Before Snape could grab his wand, the branch fell, hurtling Soren into the air. 

Without thinking, Snape leaped after him, falling several meters before grabbing him mid-air as Marie screamed desperately below them. It had been many many years since Snape had flown unassisted— he hadn’t even attempted it since the war ended, wanting to forget the dark part of his past that had brought him this skill—but the adrenaline rush caused his magic to surge and his instincts took over. 

Soren was screaming and fighting in his arms, but Snape held him tightly to his chest, floating both of them to the ground safely as Marie looked on in horror and disbelief. 

Once everyone was safe on the ground, Snape’s heart began to pound, his muscles burned, and a new anger was raging through every fiber of his body. He set Soren on the ground, immediately grabbing him and giving him a small shake “What on earth were you thinking? You could have been killed you foolish child!”

Although Marie had a million questions about what just happened, as soon Soren was free, she rushed over to him, pulling him into an enormous embrace, tears streaming down her face. “You scared us to death, Soren, are you alright? 

“Not for long,” Snape quipped under his breath. He looked around at the tree and seriously contemplated cutting a switch and whipping the boy raw, before deciding that was probably excessive, even for him. 

“Leave me alone!” Soren wailed into Marie’s leg.

Snape towered over him. “I don’t think so, you’re coming with me. You’re in a lot of trouble, little boy.”

Soren held tight to Marie. “No!”

Marie allowed the boy to take refuge in her embrace for a few more seconds. “Please, Lord Kent, everyone’s emotions are incredibly high right now. Why don’t we all go inside and calm down and then we can talk about this. That was a terrifying experience for all of us.”

“Absolutely not, Ms. Cloutier. You will stay out of this, I am his father and this isn’t your classroom, you have no domain here to tell me how to deal with my son.  He has just been dangerously reckless and outrageously disobedient and now he’s going to suffer the consequences. You can talk to him all you want about his feelings when I’m finished with him, but right now he’s coming with me.” Without another word, Snape reached out and grabbed Soren by the arm.  

“No!! You hate me!! You should have let me fall!,” Soren sobbed, now on the verge of hyperventilation as he reached for his governess and collapsed onto the ground. 

Marie knew she was overstepping her role, but Soren was clearly in distress and she was not about to let his angry father take him away in the state he was in. “I’m sorry, Lord Kent, but this is not the time for lectures and punishments. Nothing you say or do is going to get through to him right now, surely you can see that.” 

“You clearly underestimate how motivated I am to get my message across,” his eyes were flashing dangerously at her. 

“No, I’m not. Which is exactly why I think everyone should calm down first. Let me take Soren to his room for a bit and then you can decide how you want to handle things. Please.” Her voice was desperate, but measured.

Snape knew she was right, he always made it a point to be in complete control of his emotions when he was doling out a punishment, and right now he was far too angry to trust himself. His own father had always punished him in anger and he swore he would never do that, and so far, he never had. He was ashamed of himself for reacting as he had, nonetheless, Marie’s comments still irked him. 

“Fine, but you will put him directly in the corner, I don’t want him lounging on his bed resting or playing with his rabbit. Do you understand me, Soren?” Snape still had a vice-like grip on the boy’s upper arm although Soren was refusing to look at him. “When I come to get you, I better find you with your nose in the corner or you will be in far worse trouble than you are now. If that’s even possible.”

Soren was still crying but he nodded his head, yanking on his arm until Snape finally released him. 

Marie reached out and took Soren’s hand gently, “Come on Soren, let’s go inside darling,” and the two of them began walking toward the house. 

“Do not dawdle, Ms. Cloutier, I don’t want you indulging him with hugs and cuddles when he’s meant to be reflecting on his abysmal behavior. I will meet you in the parlor shortly.”

Instead of heading inside, Snape took a brisk stroll through his gardens to calm his nerves. He checked on some of his plants while he tried to settle his heart-rate and get control of all of the feelings he wasn’t prepared to be dealing with. In all of his years of looking after students and protecting the Potter brat, he had never felt the terror he felt today watching Soren nearly fall out of the tree. He was angry, of course, but that wasn’t the emotion that was bothering him, it was the gut-wrenching fear that he was going to see something terrible happen to his child and he wouldn’t be able to save him. 

But that wasn’t all. If he was completely honest with himself, Soren’s words had cut him deeply, making him feel like an abject failure. Marie was right, the boy loathed him and would rather fall to his death than trust his father to take his hand and protect him. It made him sick because he knew exactly how it felt to be that child and he hated himself even more. 

Snape walked a few more circles of the garden path before he turned back toward the manor. He could have stayed outside for hours— he had no desire to return to the chaos awaiting him in the manor, but he knew he had no choice. He steeled himself to face it all head-on. 

When he stepped into the parlor, Marie was waiting for him on the couch, sipping on a fresh tea that Tinny had put out for both of them. “Feeling better?” 

“Not particularly,” he answered honestly. And it was evident on his face, he looked defeated as he collapsed into his arm chair, his usual impeccable posture replaced by a limp form slumped onto a single armrest. 

Marie took a moment before she spoke up. “We can talk about it, if you want to.” And it looks like you need to, desperately. She had never seen the man look this way before, it was like a whole different person. 

“Thank you for your concern, Ms. Cloutier, but I hired you as a governess for my child, not a therapist for me.” As much as I apparently need one. He took a sip of tea, but it might as well have been dishwater, the taste in his mouth was a foul mix of bile and adrenaline dryness. 

“That was really scary, I can still feel my body trembling. I thought for sure I was going to see both of you fall to your deaths.” She paused for a moment before she asked the question she’d be wanting to pose to him since it happened. “Did you…fly?”

“Extraordinary things can happen when your adrenaline surges.” Snape was not about to discuss how he learned to fly, it was one of those rare skills that was almost always associated with dark wizards. And he was still not ready to address his past and who he really was with a woman he barely knew. 

“It was brilliant. They say only the most powerful wizards are capable of something like that, in fact, if I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes, I’m not sure I would have ever believed it was possible. You must be really gifted. And you saved Soren’s life.”

“Hmmm,” Snape hummed, closing his yes and leaning back in his chair, not wanting to continue this line of discussion. Several minutes passed before he took another sip of his dishwater tea and stood up, a hand reflexively going to his brow.  “I should go get Soren, it was not my intention to leave him in the corner for more than 20 minutes.” 

Marie swallowed. “I can go, if you want. Maybe you should take a rest, your body must be really depleted after all of that.”

Snape shook his head. “No, I need to handle this. Sooner rather than later.”

“What are you going to do?”

Snape raised a lazy eyebrow. “I’m not sure that’s really your concern. This is between Soren and myself.” 

Marie flushed slightly. “Please don’t be too hard on him, he’s been through so much and he’s struggling with a lot of big feelings. This might be the perfect time to try to build trust and communication.” She knew she was fighting a losing battle, but she had to try. 

“How I handle discipline in my house is not up for debate. I told you that when you started here. I like you, Ms. Cloutier, and I can see my son adores you, but I refuse to have this conversation every time Soren finds himself in trouble. I can assure you that I will not be unreasonable or cruel. Now please excuse me.”

Snape pinched the bridge of his nose and took the steps slowly. The truth was he still didn’t know how he was going to handle things. He didn’t want Soren to think he could cry to Marie everytime he misbehaved so she could rescue him. He had to know there were consequences

Chapter Text

Snape opened the boy's door to find Soren exactly where he'd told him to be. In a calm but firm voice he called him out of the corner. "Soren, come with me. We're going to my study to have a very serious discussion."

Soren turned to look at his father, tears streaming down his face. "I'm sorry." He stalled for a moment, not sure he was ready to walk to his fate.

"I can promise you won't do yourself any favors by refusing to follow my instructions. If you're truly sorry, you will demonstrate it by accepting the consequences. Now move."

Slowly Soren shuffled toward the door, the silent tears now evolving into legitimate crying.

Snape waited for Soren to step into the hallway before he began his trek to the East Wing. He didn't want to have to drag the boy, so he slowed his gait until he reached the door, tapping it twice with his wand until it opened. A quick glance backward and Soren was dragging his feet, hovering several meters away.

"You're trying my patience. You have three seconds to get in the door before I start adding to your punishment."

At those words, Soren hustled until he found himself inside the dreaded study. He took a moment to look around, surprised to see a rather warm and cozy room. He wasn't exactly sure what he expected, but the way his father had talked about it he'd imagined some kind of horrifying torture chamber filled with medieval devices and the skeletons of other badly behaved children who had had the misfortune of disobeying his father. But instead he saw a large desk with a matching executive chair, two smaller armless chairs in front of the desk, a wall full of books, a giant picture window overlooking the grounds, and a huge brown leather sofa.

The door closed ominously behind him and Soren turned his head quickly to see his father waving his wand around in what appeared to be some kind of silencing spell.

"Sit," Snape said flatly, pointing at the large chesterfield on the left side of the room with his wand.

Immediately Soren rushed to the leather sofa, choosing a spot in the middle and shoving his hands underneath his legs, nervously awaiting what would come next.

Snape took one of the smaller armless chairs with one hand and set it down dramatically a few feet in front of Soren, sitting down across from him. He tucked his wand away and waited a moment before he began.

"Explain yourself," he said plainly. "What on earth possessed you to climb 20 meters up a tree and then refuse to come down."

Soren shrugged. "I was upset."

"Why?"

A few tears streamed down Soren's face and he sniffed, but before he could wipe his face with his sleeve, his father handed him a handkerchief. Snape had started keeping them tucked away in his coat now that he seemed to be conjuring them on a regular basis these days.

"We do not use our clothes as a tissue. Now go on, tell me why."

"Cuz you think I'm stupid and you don't want me," Soren said, fresh tears flowing as he wiped his face with the soft white handkerchief.

"What makes you think that?"

"I heard you say it. You said my mum was dumb too and that's why I'm dumb. And plus, you're always mean to me and shouting at me and threatening to smack me. And then I heard you say I was being stubborn and I was afraid I was going to get in trouble." Soren cried in earnest, his sobs shaking his whole body.

Snape lifted his head toward the ceiling and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Where did you hear this?"

"Today when you were talking with Ms. Cloutier in the parlor. I just came to get a biscuit from the kitchen but then I heard you, so I hid around the corner, behind your chair. I thought maybe you would say something nice and it would make me feel better, but you didn't."

"So you were listening to a private conversation that you had no business hearing?" Snape was having to work hard to hold onto his irritation. He hated any kind of invasion of privacy, but he didn't have to think too hard to imagine how hurtful his words must have been for the young boy.

"I didn't mean to…but then I heard you talking about me. And I got really upset so I ran back outside."

"Did Tinny know you were coming inside for a biscuit?"

Soren shook his head and his ears turned red. "No, I told him I had to go to the loo."

Snape raised an eyebrow in disapproval. "So you lied, why? So you could sneak more biscuits from the kitchen?"

"Only one though. Tinny said I was only allowed two with my tea because you wanted me to eat my dinner, but I was still hungry."

"So you overheard something you should not have heard because you were being extremely naughty, lying to Tinny, and sneaking a biscuit."

"Yeah," Soren acquiesced, at least having the decency to look ashamed.

"Yes, sir. You're in enough trouble, now might be a good time to make a valiant effort to address me respectfully."

"Yes, sir," Soren whispered, the red now flushing on his face and his neck.

"Then what happened."

"I heard you say mean things and I got really mad, so I ran outside and started climbing the tree. I was really upset because Ms. Cloutier promised me you didn't hate me or think I was stupid, but I heard you say it and I wanted to run away. But I didn't know where to go so I just thought I'd climb as high as I could and then everyone would leave me alone." Soren started to cry again.

Snape let out a deep breath and sat back in his chair. He regretted what he had said about the boy and his mother, for sure, but he would have never said those things within Soren's earshot, definitely not on purpose.

"You know you should never listen to other people's conversations, And what happened today is precisely the reason why— not only is it a gross violation of other people's privacy, but there are things that aren't meant for you to hear, either because they do not concern you, or because they may be misunderstood, taken out of context, or hurtful. Just know if I had caught you then, I would have put you over my knee right there in the parlor. I'm not going to punish you for it now, but I want this lesson to be clear, if you ever so much as think about eavesdropping on me, Ms. Cloutier, or anyone, I will deal with you thoroughly and on the spot, do you understand?"

"Yes, sir."

"Good. With that being said, I want to apologize for the things I said. I was careless with my words, and I am sorry. I do not think you are stupid, and I certainly do not hate you."

"What about my mum?" Soren asked. "Why did you say mean things about her, didn't you love her?"

Oh god. Snape paused to compose himself, feeling wholly unprepared for this conversation. Finally, he found his words. "It was unkind of me to say that. In reality your mother was a lovely person whose company I enjoyed greatly, but unfortunately she did not have the benefit of the same education as I did. But it shouldn't matter, the value of a person is not their intelligence or their magical ability, it is the kind of person they are. How they treat other people, their honesty, their morals and values. And in all of those regards, your mother was beyond measure. Do you understand that?"

"Yes, sir."

"Is there anything else you heard that is bothering you?"

Soren shook his head.

"Pardon?"

"No, sir."

"Now is your chance. Once this conversation is over, we are going to put this behind us and I do not want this to come up again. I will answer your questions and apologize as necessary, but then it's done. Is that clear?"

"Yes, sir."

"Good. So what do you need to hear from me so that I can reassure you that I do not think these negative things about you."

Soren shrugged.

"Use your words."

After fidgeting slightly and picking at a spot on his trousers, Soren finally responded. "You could be nicer to me. Maybe play with me sometimes. You only talk to me when you're angry at me or telling me off."

Snape reflected for a moment. "I see. I am your father, not your friend, and it is my job to correct you and teach you how to behave, precisely because I do care about you and I want you to succeed in the world. I want people to respect you and look up to you wherever you go, and for you to be known for being an honorable man with good morals and impeccable manners. The same goes for your academics— I am holding you to the highest standards because I believe you are capable of achieving great things, and I want you to reach your highest potential. Do you understand this?"

"Yes, sir. But how come you don't want to spend time with me? Is it because you don't like me? Is it cuz you think I'm bad?"

That one hit Snape right in the gut. He took a moment before he responded…"I don't think you're bad, Soren. A bit naughty sometimes— extremely naughty today—but overall I think you are a boy with a lot of potential, and I do not want to see it wasted. But I realize now that there are things I, too, can improve on."

"Yeah, you could definitely be nicer."

Snape raised an eyebrow. "Mind your cheek. I have not changed my expectations for how I wish you to speak to me."

"Sorry."

"Are you content with my apologies, or have I missed something?"

"No, sir. That's all."

"Very good. Now let's review some of your behavior today, shall we? Let's start with the lying and dishonesty so you could have another biscuit. Do you think that is acceptable behavior?"

"No, sir."

"We do not lie in this house. If you feel the need to lie about something or hide it from me, you probably know it is wrong. I make rules for a reason. When I make a rule that you can only have two biscuits with your tea, it is because I am worried about your health and want you to eat your proper meals so that you can get strong and grow in a healthy way. It is because I care about your well-being. You may not like my rules, but you will follow them."

Soren nodded. "I know."

"If you are still hungry, you may come to me, Ms. Cloutier, or Tinny and ask for another snack. But you do not sneak into the kitchen under false pretenses to steal more biscuits behind our backs. Is that clear?"

"Yes, sir."

"If I find out you've been lying or dishonest in any way, about anything, there will be unpleasant consequences. Unfailingly. Now, let's talk about your dangerous behavior climbing the tree."

"But I'm a good tree climber!"

"Did Tinny tell you to stop? Not to climb so high?"

Soren let his head drop slightly. "Yes, sir."

"Well, then you should have stopped. I know he is our house-elf, but when Tinny is with you, you will obey him, he is an extension of me. You certainly do not disobey me or Ms. Cloutier either. When we tell you to do or not do something, I expect you to obey immediately. Did you do that today?"

"No, sir."

"No, you did not. So why do you think everyone was so upset and scared when you were high in the tree?"

"Cuz I could fall and hurt myself."

"Precisely. You are important to all of us- to me, to Ms. Cloutier, and even to Tinny. We would be extremely distraught if you got hurt or anything bad happened to you. This is why we make rules to keep you safe. I know you may not understand them all, but I assure you, your safety and health are my highest priorities."

Snape paused a moment before he continued. "When I came to rescue you from the tree, you did not obey me. Multiple times I gave you instructions that you ignored, while also being rude and disrespectful, I might add. I know you were upset, but that is not an excuse. So now I want you to apologize for all of your misbehavior today."

Soren thought for a moment before he began. "I'm sorry for lying to Tinny and sneaking a biscuit. And for not coming down from the tree when you and Tinny told me to. And for being disrespectful."

"What got you into this mess in the first place?"

"Oh, for listening to a conversation I wasn't supposed to. I'm really sorry for that." Soren nodded his head, his eyes showing true contrition.

"The most egregious part of today is that you did something you knew was dangerous, and you put your life at risk, on purpose. I expect you will make mistakes, but this is one behavior I do not want you to repeat. I will have no tolerance whatsoever for you doing anything so reckless again. There are a lot of things we can fix, but your life is irreplaceable. If I ever find out you've done something so dangerous again, you will get the hiding of your life. There will be no calm discussion, no protection from Ms. Cloutier, I will take us directly to the study and tan your hide until you can't sit for a week, without hesitation. I want to be very clear about that."

Soren's eyes got big and he nodded. "Yes, sir. I'm really sorry."

"Now for your punishment…"

Soren leaned forward and put his hands on his father's knees. "Please, father. I'm really sorry, you don't need to punish me. I won't do it again, any of it. I was upset, but I feel better now. I'll be good. I promise."

In all his years of teaching and meting out punishments, Snape had never once let a student's begging affect him in any way. Ever. But something had happened to him today, perhaps the guilt he felt for his role in this whole fiasco, that made it impossible for him to carry out the punishment he intended. Still, he couldn't let him walk out the door without something.

Hardening his voice, Snape grabbed Soren by the wrist and pulled him up until he was standing between his legs. "Come here."

Soren's eyes filled with tears and his breath hitched. "I'm really sorry…please father."

"I know you are, but there are consequences to your actions. I think you know that."

"Are you going to spank me?" he said, with his head down, tears rolling down his face.

Snape was struggling with how difficult this was going to be. Honestly, against all of his usual inclinations he had nearly lost all resolve and was still considering whether or not he should. But ultimately he knew he should be consistent, otherwise the boy would never take him seriously, or worse, would be confused about what to expect from him moving forward. Not to mention, Snape believed it was an important part of closure, a way to move forward without guilt. "Yes, I think you've rather earned it, don't you?"

"Yes, sir," Soren whispered.

"Well then, let's get it over with. There's no point in dragging it out further." With that, Snape carefully bent him over his left thigh and gave him ten moderately hard smacks with his hand. They were delivered calmly, and methodically, and even though Snape wanted to make sure Soren felt them (it would be pointless otherwise), he was not putting his usual gusto into it, and while Soren yelped with each one, he didn't cry out or fight them. It was easily the most half-hearted punishment Snape had ever given, but he felt like he needed some kind of follow-through, for both their sakes.

When Snape was done, he pulled Soren up and looked him straight in the eyes, his two hands grasping the boy's arms firmly, but gently. "Never again. I want you to promise me you will never be so cavalier with your own life again, that you will never be so flippant about falling to your death or hurting yourself."

"I promise," Soren said, tears now rolling down his cheeks. "I really am sorry."

"I believe you." Snape pulled out another handkerchief and dabbed at the boy's tears before bringing him closer so he could look him directly in the eyes."I'm sorry again for the hurtful words I said that made you feel that your life was not important to me. That couldn't be further from the truth. I'm also sorry that I have made you doubt your intelligence, and that I said unfair things about your mother. I cannot undo the words that you heard today or the pain that they caused you, but I can promise that I will do better to make sure I do not ever make the same mistake again. I hope in time you will forgive me, but ultimately that is for you to decide."

Soren nodded his head, his eyelashes dark and wet with tears. He reached out and put his arms around his father's neck, laying a head on his shoulder. "I forgive you, father. Do you forgive me?"

Snape was caught off-guard by the hug and simply patted the boy on the back. "Yes, you never need to ask me that, you will always be forgiven. I may get angry with you or punish you when you misbehave, but I will never not forgive you. Once you've been punished, the slate is wiped clean and we will move on."

He stood still another moment before he extricated himself from the boy's embrace. "Tonight you will go straight to bed after supper. And on Sunday, you will spend the morning doing chores when Ms. Cloutier is on her day-off. But just know this, you are on very thin ice right now, if you step one toe out of line, I will not be this lenient again. Do you understand me?"

"Yes, father." Soren said, a smile on his face for the first time in hours now that the weight of everything had completely gone. His bum wasn't even hurting that much, well, nothing like the smacks he'd received last time that had burned like a raging inferno. He knew his father had gone exceptionally easy on him today, but he really was going to be on his best behavior, he was determined to prove to him what a good boy he really was.

"Now at least have the decency to look properly punished when you leave here, I don't want you to ruin my reputation by bounding out of my study with a smile," Snape said drolly. "And you will apologize to Tinny and Ms. Cloutier, you gave them both a terrible fright today. I also want you to tell Tinny the truth about what you were up to, he deserves your full honesty about what happened today."

He then stood up and returned the chair to the front of his desk and put a hand on Soren's shoulder, opening the door and escorting him down the stairs and to the parlor, where they found Marie, reading quietly on the sofa, her nerves frayed.

"Soren has something to say to you."

Marie looked up, shocked to see Soren in one piece, his father's hand on his shoulder, and a calm look on his face. His eyes were slightly red-rimmed, but he wasn't nearly as distraught as she'd feared he would be.

"I'm really sorry for scaring you today, Ms. Cloutier. I should have come down right away from the tree, I promise I won't do anything like that again."

Without another moment, Marie took Soren's hand and pulled him into her, hugging him tightly. "I know, Soren. Are you alright?" She smoothed a hand down his arm lovingly.

Snape rolled his eyes. "He's perfectly fine, as you can see."

And it was true, Soren looked more relaxed and content than he had most days so far. The long conversation with his father had soothed some of his fears, and even though he had no doubt he would still be dealing with a strict and unyielding man, he felt something had shifted today. And maybe his father did care for him after all.

Marie stared at the boy and then Lord Kent, wondering if he had cast some sort of spell. She'd spent the last hour in absolute panic worrying he was beating the boy black and blue, and yet here Soren was, smiling shyly in front of her, completely at ease with his father in a way he had not been before. She was extremely curious about what had transpired in his study, but she wouldn't dare ask, he was a man who valued his privacy and didn't take kindly to prying questions.

They soon shifted to the dining room for supper and had one of their most quiet, but pleasant meals yet. When their plates were empty, Snape looked at Soren. "You may be excused. Get ready for bed, I will be up shortly."

Soren said nothing and calmly got down from his chair, making his way toward Marie with his arms out. "Goodnight, Ms. Cloutier."

"Goodnight, Soren. Sleep well." Marie pushed her chair out and gave him a quick hug. "I'll see you tomorrow, darling." She searched his face for any sign of fear, but he showed no hint of anything concerning, despite her worst fears.

"As part of his punishment, Soren will be going to bed directly after supper tonight. I will just go up to make sure he is in bed. You are free to retire whenever you like, of course, but if you wish to join me for a nightcap, I'll return to the parlor as soon as I'm finished."

Upstairs, Soren rushed to get ready for bed, filled with nervous anticipation that his father was going to be coming up to check on him. He brushed his teeth, changed into pajamas and sat up in bed, holding his rabbit and waiting anxiously. The minutes seemed to drag on before he heard the unmistakable sound of his father's footsteps coming down the hall.

"Good, you're in bed," Snape said as he approached him. His voice was not angry, but stern. "There will be no further foolishness tonight, and you will stay in bed until morning. Hopefully your little adventure today has sufficiently worn you out and you'll fall right to sleep. If not, you are not to get up for any reason, unless it is to use the toilet. Do you understand?"

"Yes, father. I'll stay in bed," Soren said eagerly, wanting nothing more than to please him.

Snape gave a curt nod of approval before pulling the corner of the duvet down slightly so Soren could get fully under the sheets. "Now lay down properly and close your eyes."

It was hardly the same warm and cuddly tuck-in he got from his governess, but Soren complied immediately, holding his rabbit close to his chest and turning onto his side and pulling up the covers. "Goodnight, father."

"Goodnight."

With a dramatic swish of his wand, Snape darkened the room leaving only a small light burning in the washroom. As he walked toward the door, he turned around to give one final warning.

"I mean it, if I hear a single noise that makes me think you're up here playing about, you'll be over my knee faster than you can blink. And I will not be nearly as lenient as I was with you earlier. Now go to sleep." And with that, he closed the door just firmly enough to punctuate his message.

Soren couldn't help himself, he smiled with his whole face. His father had actually come up and put him to bed. And even if it wasn't the cuddliest of tuck-ins, Soren was beginning to feel safe with him. The man had saved his life today, and had leapt out of the tree without hesitation to catch him. And even if words of affirmation weren't his father's strong suit (his love language was clearly "words of foreboding and elaborate threats"), he obviously cared for him.

"I'm going to be the bestest boy in the whole world," Soren whispered to his rabbit. "Then he'll love me and keep me forever."

To Snape's surprise, he found Marie sitting in the parlor, waiting to join him for a drink.

She whipped her head around when she heard him coming down the stairs. "Is everything OK? Is Soren alright?"

Snape dipped his head slightly to one-side and gave her a disapproving glare. "Honestly, Ms. Cloutier, I don't know what kind of monster you think I am, but I assure you, he's perfectly fine. I'm not generally in the habit of torturing small children, tempting though it may be. Now then, would you care for a drink?"

Marie nodded. "That would be lovely. What are you having?"

"Firewhisky, but I also have a nice selection of fine wines, port, and cognac if you prefer something different."

"I'm generally not a big drinker, but honestly, after a day like today, a firewhisky sounds perfect."

"Indeed." Snape signaled to Tinny, who returned quickly with two crystal tumblers, generously filled with amber liquid. "Should we make a toast? To survival, perhaps?"

Marie chuckled and lifted her glass. "I will definitely drink to that! Cheers!"

"Cheers," Snape said as he clinked her glass before settling back into his armchair.

"You look like you're feeling better."

Snape took a long sip from his glass, closing his eyes and savoring the burn. He let out a long exhale before he opened his eyes and replied. "I'm sure I'll feel even better after another glass of this and a long night of sleep."

They sat in silence for a few minutes, each sipping their drinks and no doubt replaying the scenes from earlier in the day. After finishing his first glass rather quickly, Snape had Tinny pour him another three fingers. "I should mention that I appreciate you keeping a level head today. I was not in full control of my emotions earlier and you were right to step in as you did. We are lucky to have you here, Ms. Cloutier."

Marie was starting to think she was hallucinating, first the flying, now this? It took her a moment to even register what he said. Was he—the man who did nothing but criticize her—saying something nice? Appreciative even? "Thank you, Lord Kent. I think anyone in your situation would have been just as overwhelmed, you're a human being you know, you're allowed to have feelings. I'm just glad you realized it before you acted on them."

"I know you think I'm cold, even unkind, but I do care for Soren. It's all just…new. I never imagined myself having children, it wasn't something I ever felt particularly well-suited for…clearly." The firewhisky had loosened his tongue, and as soon as the words came out of his lips, Snape chided himself. But the emotions of the day were heavy, and he was too tired to carry them alone, as he had done for so many years.

"I know you do. And I think Soren knows that now too." Marie wanted to put a reassuring hand on his arm, but his chair was just far enough away that she couldn't reach it without making things awkward.

"Do you know why he climbed the tree?" Snape asked, massaging his forehead with one hand, while he sipped with the other.

"I'm guessing he had some big feelings he didn't know how to process. I heard what he said to you on the ground, I'm sure that was hurtful."

"Yes. But there's more to it than that. He apparently overheard some of our conversation earlier, when I alluded to the fact that both he and his mother may be of limited intelligence." Snape cringed at the memory of his own words. "Obviously hearing that was what prompted such strong emotions. He told me he was certain then that I not only thought he was stupid, but that I hated him as well."

Marie looked horrified. "Oh god, that's awful. No wonder he was so upset, the poor boy."

"I feel terrible, I should have never said those things. I regret much of the way I handled that conversation. I apologized to Soren, but I feel I should apologize to you as well. I should know better at this stage of my life that words can wound people, sometimes permanently, and just like any weapon, they should be handled with extreme care. So, I'm sorry for my insensitive words, Ms. Cloutier, I can assure you I will not make such a mistake again."

Snape was not one who ever apologized. Mostly because he kept to a strong moral code and personal set of values, and rarely felt that he needed to. Even if others found fault with him, he was at his core a good man. He could be harsh, and brutally honest, but there were only a very few times in his life he had done things that he truly regretted. Things that hurt other people, particularly people he cared about. And this was one of them. There was something cathartic about apologizing to Marie, but he was not planning to make it a habit. He hoped those were the last apologies he would have to make for a long time. Preferably for the rest of his life. He loathed having to admit he was imperfect.

"Thank you, Lord Kent, your words mean a lot. Try not to be so hard on yourself, though, we all make mistakes. What's important is that we learn from them and do better, and it sounds like you have already made that commitment to yourself. I'm sure Soren appreciated hearing that as well. Only a really good parent takes the time to apologize to their child…you should be proud of yourself."

"Are you attempting to 'gentle parent' me, Ms. Cloutier? I can assure you, I am perfectly capable of managing myself." Snape quipped, lightening the mood.

"If it would make you feel better, I can always go get the naughty step. I'll make sure to put it in the corner first, of course, so you get the full effect." Marie couldn't stop herself from letting out a small chuckle, feeling a pleasant buzz from the firewhisky.

"Very cheeky, Ms. Cloutier. But you'd do well to remember that I'm the one who hands out the punishments in this house." He gave her a mock stern look causing her to erupt into more laughter.

"Yes, you've made that very clear, you don't let anyone get away with a thing in this house."

Snape paused and set down his drink before hardening his face and lowering his voice. He wanted to make it clear he was changing the tone of the conversation. "Speaking of which, we need to discuss the fact you didn't have your wand today. That was extremely reckless."

"It's not like we're at war. I don't need to walk around with my wand in my hand all of the time, that kind of hyper-vigilance is a trauma response, you know. Maybe you should talk to someone." Marie continued to giggle, refusing to take him seriously.

"I don't find that the least bit funny, Ms. Cloutier. There is a magical child in this house and Merlin knows what could happen at any time, as we saw today. You should always, always, have your wand on you. Imagine if I had not been there today, or I wasn't able to rescue him in the way that I did, you were not there to cast a spell to cushion him or do anything to save him. That is a serious transgression in my book and I want you to make sure it never happens again."

Marie was always somewhat amused when he lectured her, but the firewhisky had quickly gone to her head, and now her filters were completely gone. She smiled playfully at him before giving a dramatic roll of her eyes. "Oh no, am I in trouble with Daddy now? What are you going to do, take me to your study and punish me like a naughty child?" She laughed even harder at this.

He lifted his eyebrow at the suggestion, but kept his face stern and his tone flat. "That can easily be arranged. In fact, I can think of more than a few good reasons you'd benefit from a trip over my knee. And I have no doubt you'd be much more inclined to remember your wand if you had a sore backside to remind you in the morning."

Marie's face was already a bit flushed from the booze, but she could feel the heat raising on her cheeks at his suggestion. Would he really do it, or is he just teasing me? And why am I so intrigued by the idea? Because you're a psychopath. Get it together, Marie. She searched his face trying to figure out if he was joking, but it was completely unreadable. She'd definitely stepped over the line and her embarrassment sobered her up quickly, her face and ears burning everytime she replayed his words. "I'm sorry, Lord Kent, the firewhisky has clearly gone to my head. You're absolutely right, I should have had my wand today, I felt extremely helpless when you were up there and I would have never forgiven myself if something had happened to Soren. I can promise you I will always keep it with me from now on."

"See that you do. But just so know, if you ever find yourself in need of some assistance to remember, I will happily oblige." He smirked slightly this time, enjoying her clear discomfort.

"Thank you, but I think I can manage."

"We'll see," Snape said in his most patronizing tone, pairing it with a look that said he didn't believe her one bit.

Marie's face flushed again. Why do you let him wind you up like this? Because you like it, you pervert.

Snape stood, setting his empty tumbler on the side table. "It's been a long day, I think I will retire upstairs. I'll be in my study for the next hour or so writing. Should you need anything. Goodnight, Ms. Cloutier."

"Goodnight, Lord Kent."

Marie remained on the couch, slowly sipping the remainder of her drink, feverishly debating her internal voices while also wishing the floor would just swallow her up. When she finally made her way up the stairs, she paused on the landing for a fleeting moment wondering if she was bold enough to knock on his study door and call his bluff. Are you insane? You're drunk, you idiot. Go to bed! Ultimately, she turned right and made her way back to her room, where she fell asleep without even taking her clothes off.

On Saturday morning, everyone gathered around the kitchen table, well-rested, and surprisingly cheerful. With no classes, the day was almost entirely free, and Marie was surprised when Lord Kent joined them briefly for a walk in the garden, pointing out some of the more interesting trees and plants growing on the property, and how they might be used in potions.

Marie could see he was making an effort to connect with Soren, and the boy was lapping up every second of attention, eagerly asking questions and paying attention to every word.

"Father, will you do the hedge maze with me? Please!" Soren begged, pulling on his hand.

"I cannot today, I need to return to my lab soon, I have a potion brewing that requires some tending. But I'm sure Ms. Cloutier will be more than happy to go with you."

Soren's face fell and he moaned with annoyance. "No! You can't leave, you just got here, pleaseeee? I always go with Ms. Cloutier. I want to go in the maze with you!"

Snape pulled firmly on the boy's hand and looked down at him sternly, hardening his features. "Excuse me? You will mind how you speak to me. And don't even think of throwing a tantrum. I said I cannot this time, so we will do it another day. Now that's the end of it."

"Yes, sir." Soren was clearly disappointed, but he also knew when he was getting close to pushing his father over the edge and he didn't want to spoil the day, it had been the first time his father had ever elected to spend time with him outside of meals and he was really enjoying it.

Marie came up and put an arm around the boy, "I would love to walk in the maze with you. Besides, the more we go through it, the easier it will be to beat your father the next time he wants to race you through it!" She gave him a quick tickle and he laughed. "You go ahead, I will join you in a minute."

"Yeah! I'm gonna to go practice right now!" Soren said excitedly, sprinting off toward the maze.

"Don't be so confident in your victory, Ms. Cloutier. I designed it, you know. Every little spell on that maze is one of my own creations. But please, don't let that spoil your fun. The more practice you have with it, the less humiliated you'll be should you ever make the unfortunate decision to challenge me in a race."

"You underestimate my competitive spirit, Lord Kent, I always find a way to win." She flashed him a mischievous grin and noticed that even though his face remained impassive, his eyes flickered with delight.

Snape tutted patronizingly at her. "My, my, we are feeling brave today. Just know, Ms. Cloutier, I do not look kindly on people who cheat, so if that was what you were implying, you should do so at your own peril. Cheating is a highly egregious and punishable offense in my house. We wouldn't want Soren to think that was something he could get away with."

Marie laughed as they strolled slowly down a short garden path. "Presumptuous of you to think I'd ever be so careless as to get caught. I've told you before, I only break rules I know I can get away with. And I'm undefeated."

Snape paused and turned toward her, putting his hands behind his back and leering down at her in full-professor mode, complete with his most disapproving glare. "This is no doubt the unfortunate result of a complete lack of discipline and no respect for authority. Tell me again, Ms. Cloutier, what a shining example you are for the virtues of permissive parenting."

"I think I turned out pretty well. I mean, I wouldn't say I'm beyond redemption." She gave him a confident smirk.

"It's certainly nothing I couldn't fix with a few trips to my study. I find a good dose of old-fashioned discipline can do wonders for even the most stubborn and overconfident witches. Particularly those who feel they are far too clever to respect the rules."

Marie just shrugged, fully committed now to seeing how far he was willing to take this banter. "I mean, if you're smart enough to get away with something, the rules shouldn't really apply to you. That's my philosophy anyway."

He raised an eyebrow. "I see. So by your logic, if you're not smart enough to get away with it, then you deserve to get caught and any consequences that come along with that. Or do you just plan to cry, beg, and attempt to charm your way out of it? That is usually the plan B for troublemakers, is it not?"

"I wouldn't know, I never get caught. But to answer your question, if someone is careless enough to get caught, they honestly deserve whatever they get. I don't really concern myself with what happens to such people."

"How intriguing," he drawled. "I shall keep that in mind should you ever have the audacity to think you're clever enough to get away with breaking any of my rules."

"I mean, so far I have an impeccable record, so I wouldn't really keep your hopes up."

"So far are the key words there, Ms. Cloutier. I will remind you that I am an exceptionally patient man. Like Sun Tzu said: 'If you wait by the river long enough, you'll see the bodies of your enemies float by.'"

Before Marie could respond with something cheeky, Snape looked at his watch. "And now I must return to my work. But please, enjoy your time in the maze. Let me know when you're bold enough for a challenge. I'm eagerly looking forward to thrashing you soundly. Either way." He gave her a devilish smirk before disapparating to the dungeons, leaving Marie with her heart-racing, her eyes fully and a flush of exhilaration.

Marie spent the remainder of the day with Soren, playing in the gardens, reading in the library, playing chess with him in the parlor. But her thoughts were constantly on Lord Kent. She thought about him way more than she should considering she was a good deal younger than he was, not to mention he was her boss. And he's an arrogant, uptight control-freak who is as warm and fuzzy as a block of ice.

By the time dinner arrived, she was practically desperate to see him. She watched the clock constantly, every minute dragging until he finally appeared in the parlor twenty minutes prior to dinner.

Soren and Marie were sitting in the parlor playing a game of "Go Fish" with a pack of cards she'd brought with her. When the little boy saw his father, he got up on his knees in excitement. "Father! Ms. Cloutier taught me how to play a card game, do you want to play with us? It's really fun!"

Snape raised a disapproving eyebrow at Marie. "Indoctrinating my son into the world of gambling, are we? What an exceptional use of your time."

"It's only 'Go Fish,' it's a children's game." Marie attempted to smile at him but sensed right away he wasn't in the mood for banter. The playful air about him that she had enjoyed so much this afternoon was gone, somthing was bothering him.

"I don't want him playing with cards again." Snape said matter-of-factly, banishing the cards with a single wave of his hand.

"Hey! Why did you do that? We were playing with that!" Soren exclaimed, indignant, and giving a menacing look to the man from the floor.

"I beg your pardon?" Snape said with a deep sneer, stalking over to the little boy and lifting him up by the arm so he could look at him in the face. "I've clearly let you get away with far too much cheek if you think you can speak to me that way. Go to the corner. Now."

Soren knew he was in trouble, he could see it on his father's face and hear it in his tone, but when his father released his arm, he stood still and looked him in the eyes, feeling brave but hurt. "We were just having fun, you didn't have to ruin it by being so mean."

Snape grabbed his arm and gave him two hard smacks right on top of one another. "Into the corner. Now. Any further cheek and you'll get a proper smacking, now move."

Soren didn't need another reminder, he moved quickly to the corner, his face burning with tears of disappointment, his backside stinging from the smacks.

"Lord Kent, honestly, it was just a simple game. Don't you think you're overreacting?"

Snape turned his attention to Marie. "You would do well to mind how you speak to me as well. How many times must I tell you that you are not to question how I discipline my son? You're insufferable."

Well, then, thought Marie. "I'm sorry."

Snape sat in his armchair with his eyes closed and a hand massaging his forehead. Soren was whimpering softly in the corner and Marie stayed perched on the edge of the sofa unsure of whether she should say anything else.

No one said a word for several minutes and time seemed to go by excruciatingly slow as the tension hung in the air, the only sounds coming from Soren who was sniffling.

Finally, Snape broke the silence. "By the way, we will be having guests here tomorrow," he said in an irritated tone.

"Oh. I had actually planned to be out most of the day tomorrow to see some friends for lunch and do some shopping. Do you need me to stay?"

"No. Your day off is your day and it will always be respected. You've earned a break." His tone was flat, but with far less tension.

"Thank you."

Snape nodded briefly but wasn't looking at her. "Soren, your time is up. Come here."

Soren turned around and walked toward his father, his head hanging down. He was feeling quite sorry for himself after having had such a brilliant day.

When he got within reach, Snape took his wrist and pulled him in closer. "Look at me."

Soren lifted his sad brown eyes upward.

"You know quite well that is not how you speak to me or any adult, do you not?" Snape scolded gently.

"Yes, sir." He sniffed a bit. "I'm sorry. Are you still mad at me?" Tears welled slightly in his eyes.

"No. We talked about this yesterday. When you misbehave, I may punish you, but then we move on. But the expectation is that you learn your lesson and do better. This is not the first time I have had to remind you today to watch how you speak to me, which is why I sent you to the corner. Had you simply obeyed, that would have been all, but instead you took that moment to give me more cheek. Not a very wise choice, do you think?"

"No, sir. I'm sorry, I really didn't mean to, I was just mad." Soren let a few tears roll down his face. He really was trying his best to be good, but he couldn't even make it one full day.

"I realize that. You are welcome to your feelings, but it is not an excuse for bad behavior. Now that's enough tears. It's finished. I don't want you sulking over it for the rest of the evening. You're a child, you are going to make mistakes. I will correct them and then we move on. Now fix your face. If I have to spend one more minute watching you mope about like a kicked puppy, I will hex you with a cheer-up charm." He pulled out a handkerchief, wiping the wet streaks from both side's of the boy's face— not exactly gently, but in a very parental way.

When he was done wiping the tears, Soren just stood there, as if he were waiting for something else. What, is he expecting a cuddle now? Snape had to resist the urge to say something snide, but he realized the boy needed some kind of reassurance so he patted him briefly on the shoulder. "Good, now go sit down."

This seemed to do the trick, and although it wasn't exactly what Soren was going for, it was enough for him to feel a little more assured that his father had forgiven him and wasn't angry anymore.

Marie was quietly fascinated watching Snape handle the whole interaction. Although she was still very against his use of corporal punishment and the way he punished first and asked questions later, she was impressed with the way he'd handle Soren afterward. Still a little cold for her taste, but she supposed the fact that he was acknowledging the boy's feelings was at least a start. Maybe there was hope for him.

Once Soren was sitting on the couch, Snape made an effort to soften his voice and converse with him normally. "So what did you and Ms. Cloutier get up to today? I'm very curious to know how you fared in the maze. If you hope to take me on one day, you're going to have to practice very hard. I can complete that maze in 2 minutes with my eyes closed."

Soren smiled. "I did it three times! Ms. Cloutier only did it once, though. But she's really good at it. Except its not fair, she uses her wand and I don't have one!"

"Is that so," Snape asked, raising an eyebrow at Marie. "I'll have you know that's cheating, Ms. Cloutier. Even though the maze is charmed, it is meant to be solved by logic, not magic. You need to sharpen your mind, not your wand skills, if you want to succeed in the maze."

Marie blushed slightly. "I was just testing some things out, I wanted to see if I could stop the maze from changing. But whatever spells you've put on them are incredibly complex, I couldn't figure out how to manipulate them at all."

"Pity," he said, playfully. "I suppose you'll have to be content with losing then."

Soren was enjoying the banter, although he had no context for the conversation. "Ms. Cloutier is really clever though, father, and we're going to practice the maze every day until we can win!"

"I admire your dedication to such a lofty goal, Soren. I will always encourage you to spend time practicing any skill until you can master it. That is an excellent quality."

Soren lapped up the compliment, it was the first time his father had ever said anything remotely uplifting.

"Perhaps Ms. Cloutier might learn from your example. Hard work is the best way to achieve success, not wasting time looking for short-cuts. I would encourage you both to remember that."

"I disagree, Lord Kent. I say work smarter, not harder. If you can achieve your goal by being more clever, there's no reason to spend so much additional energy."

He stared at her with disapproval, but Marie could tell by his eyes that he was not quietly amused.

"We can do the maze together tomorrow, father. You can show me how you do it!" Soren said excitedly, looking forward to spending time alone with the man on Marie's day off. He had dreaded it all week, but was now looking forward to it.

"We'll see," Snape said, a slight edge in his tone. "We have guests coming tomorrow, and I may need to have some serious discussions with them. Privately. Which means you will need to entertain yourself for some of the day. It might also be a good time to practice your reading or review some of what you learned this week so you can start off ahead on Monday."

"Oh." Soren's face fell slightly but he did his best to control his disappointment. "Who's coming?"

"Mr. Potter…and friends." He couldn't help but to sneer slightly.

At this, Soren got excited and bounced in his seat. "Harry is coming to visit me!"

"You do not address adults by their first names. He is Mr. Potter to you, do you understand?"

"Yes, sir. But he told me to call him Harry."

"I don't care if he told you to call him King of the World, in this house, you will always refer to adults by their proper name and title. You would do well to remember that."

"Yes, sir."

At this point Marie couldn't help herself. "Harry Potter? THE Harry Potter, is coming here? Tomorrow?"

It took all of Snape's energy not to roll his eyes. "Yes. We have some business to attend to."

"I thought he was coming to see me." Soren said, pouting slightly.

"I'm sure he will be delighted to see you, but we have some other things to discuss tomorrow."

"I had no idea you knew Harry Potter! That's so exciting, maybe I should stay and meet him. He's like, the most famous wizard in the world right now!"

"Yes, so I'm told," Snape's irritation was evident in his voice.

"How do you know him?" Marie asked, now completely invested.

"I would appreciate if you didn't pry, Ms. Cloutier. One should respect other people's discretion, both in business and in personal matters."

Marie figured she wouldn't get a straight answer out of him, and he had, politely, put her in her place. "You're right, I apologize."

"Father, can I show Mr. Potter the maze tomorrow?" Soren asked, innocently. "I think he'll really like it!"

A vision of Cedric Diggory's limp body came flooding back to him suddenly, and Harry's traumatized face after nearly dying at the hands of Voldemort. It was one of the darkest days of Snape's life as a professor and a spy. He was sure Harry would have a panic attack if he had to ever step foot in a maze again. As much as he might enjoy the thought of bringing the boy down a notch, as a survivor of trauma himself, he would never knowingly thrust something so triggering on another person.

"Not tomorrow. Mr. Potter is a very busy man, he is not coming here to roam around in my gardens." He didn't know how else to explain it to the boy.

"Oh."

"I'm sure he'll find some time to spend with you another day, perhaps you can show him your classroom and what you've learned. I think he will be very impressed with your counting."

"Yes, sir. I will!"

This thankfully seemed to cheer the boy up and they headed to the dining room for their evening meal, Snape feeling slightly better but still dreading the day ahead. The letter he'd gotten from Potter was weighing heavily on him, but he was making every effort not to let it affect everyone else.

Chapter Text

On Sunday morning, Marie procrastinated some after breakfast, hoping to catch a glimpse of Harry Potter. She'd heard so much about him, he was the subject of so much lore and she was dying to know what he was like in real life. She sat in the parlor reading and having tea far longer than she should have.

Immediately after breakfast, Snape had sent Soren to do his "chores" (mainly to tidy his room and the classroom) while he finished some work in his study. When he returned to the parlor at nearly 11am, he was surprised to see Marie still sitting there.

"This is your day-off, Ms. Cloutier, you should go enjoy it. Aren't you meant to be meeting friends for lunch?" He stood over her, his arms behind his back. 

"Not for a little while longer, I'm just reading my book." Marie didn’t bother to look up, she had her nose buried in a copy of Pride and Prejudice she’d borrowed from his library, and she was enjoying it far more than she remembered. Despite her best efforts, she couldn't help but draw some comparisons between Lord Kent and Mr. Darcy—and it was fueling her imagination well beyond what she knew was appropriate.

"Do not miss out on your day for Mr. Potter's sake. He will no doubt be back again soon." Unfortunately. When she finally looked up at him, he continued. "Today is not a social visit, and we have some very important matters to discuss. You will have other opportunities to meet him. Although, I assure you, he is not nearly as interesting as he is made out to be." Snape couldn't help himself adding that little tidbit at the end.

"Are you kidding? He literally saved the wizarding world, he's a hero."

"A feat for which he is given much credit, yet did not achieve on his own." Snape picked the book out of her hands, marking her page with a non-verbal spell, before closing it and handing it back to her. "Go enjoy your day, Ms. Cloutier. Your fantasies of Mr. Darcy will still be here when you get back."

Marie blushed slightly at having been called out so precisely. "I'm not even that big of a fan of Mr. Darcy, actually. He's a bit too arrogant and stuck-up for my taste. I read Jane Austen for the strong female characters."

"Evidently you dislike him so much you've re-read the Netherfield Ball scene enough times that my poor book practically opens right to it." He gave her a knowing smirk.

"Elizabeth has some very good lines in that scene, I'll have you know. For a woman of her time, she was quite bold and witty. Now if you'll excuse me, I should probably get going, it's getting late." She put the book into her bag and held her head up high as she approached the floo.

Snape reached up for the floo powder he kept on the mantle and offered it to her gently. "Have a lovely day, Ms. Cloutier. Behave yourself."

"Well that wouldn't be very much fun, now would it?" She gave him a sassy smile, grabbed a handful of floo powder and stepped into the flame.

Snape allowed himself a moment of quiet amusement as he replaced the floo powder, before heading upstairs to look for Soren. He adjusted his countenance appropriately, wanting to make sure he clearly laid out his expectations before Potter arrived.

Snape checked the boy's room first, and found it empty but sufficiently tidy, before discovering Soren in the classroom, sitting quietly on one of the beanbag chairs attempting to read. With silent steps he approached him, not wanting to disturb his focus. When it was clear he was at a stopping point, Snape made his presence known.

"I see you're practicing your reading. Very good,” he said, wanting to encourage Soren to spend his free time in scholarly pursuits. Snape hoped he would take after him that way, rather than being like the majority of his students who used every free moment to seek out mischief.

"Yes, sir. But it's really hard. I'm not very good at it." Soren felt ashamed, he wanted to show his father how clever he was, but he was still struggling.

"Show me what you're reading, perhaps I can help."

"Do you want to sit down on the beanbag with me? That's what Ms. Cloutier does. Then we can look at the pages together." Soren grabbed the beanbag to his right, pulling it a bit closer.

Snape looked down at the hideous red blob, knowing full-well he wouldn't be caught dead in one. "Why don't you choose some books to take downstairs, then we can sit on the sofa and have tea while we read them."

The little boy jumped up, over the moon that his father was going to spend time reading with him. He chose his three favorite books and followed the man downstairs, practically skipping the whole way.

Snape had a lot of other things he needed to be doing, but he figured he had to spend a few minutes with the boy before he banished him for the rest of the day so he could have his meeting with Potter. He was afraid if he did not, Soren was liable to throw some kind of tantrum complaining about how he never spends time with him, or god forbid do something to embarrass him while guests were here.

Soren bounded to the sofa and patted the seat next to him. "You can sit here father, so you can see the pages."

Snape always sat in his armchair, he liked to be where he was alone and no one could invade his personal space. He felt oddly vulnerable sitting on the sofa without the protection of the high back and arms of his favorite chair.

He had left nearly a foot between himself and the boy, a gap which Soren quickly closed by scooting over until he was practically right on top of him. Snape had left no more room on the other side, so he was properly trapped and would have to tolerate the proximity for a few more minutes.

"Here, let's read this one. It's about a little boy and a tree. It's kind of sad though."

"I'll do my best not to get too emotionally invested. Go on, start with the title."

Over the next fifteen minutes, Soren sputtered disastrously through the book, Snape having to jump in to help him with nearly every word. It was far worse than he thought based on his discussion with Marie. He would have to get Marie to do some extra tutoring outside of their normal lessons, perhaps some special books on phonics.

When they finally finished the second book, Snape set it down and turned toward Soren. "That's enough for now. I want to talk to you about what to expect for the rest of the afternoon."

"Mr. Potter is coming!" Soren bounced up slightly on the sofa, clearly looking forward to seeing him. Harry had been so kind and nice to him in those days before he had come to the manor.

"Yes, but we have important business to take care of, so you will need to stay upstairs and out of the way, do you understand?"

"But I want to see him! He promised he would come and visit me!" Soren complained.

Snape ignored the whiny tone. "You may greet him and say hello, and then you will excuse yourself, politely, and go upstairs. You may read or work in the classroom, or spend time in your room. If you wish to go outside, you may do so with Tinny, but you will mind him no matter what. We will have no repeats of what happened last time. Your feet will stay firmly on the ground, and if Tinny has to come get me because you are misbehaving or not following his directions, you will be a very sorry little boy. Am I clear?"

"Yes, sir." Soren blushed slightly with shame thinking about how rude he'd been to Tinny.

"Very well, then. Let's have lunch and then you will go upstairs, change into some of your nicer clothes, and brush your hair. I don't want you to look like a street urchin when they get here."

After lunch, Snape sent Soren upstairs to rest and prepare himself for the company. He took the opportunity to do the same, arranging some papers and doing a quick check of his clothes, face, and hair before settling himself in the parlor to wait. He took slow deep breaths in an effort to calm his anxiety.

At 2:00pm on the dot, Harry came through the floo with two other Ministry officials in tow.

Snape stood from his armchair to greet them, vaguely recognizing both of the other wizards, instantly relieved when he realized they were too old to be former students of his. He was fairly certain he remembered one of them was a Hufflepuff a few years above him, the other one he couldn't quite place although his face seemed familiar.

"It's a pleasure to see you sir, how are you?" Harry looked a bit stressed but was trying to be upbeat.

"I'd be infinitely more pleased if we weren't having this meeting," Snape said flatly.

"I know, I'm very sorry. I'll explain everything soon. First, let me introduce you to two of my colleagues at the Ministry, this is Chester McLaggan, I'm sure you remember his son, Cormac, and his brother Tiberius."

"Vaguely."

The man stuck out his hand. "It's a pleasure to meet you, finally, Professor."

Snape didn't correct him but shook his hand briefly, refusing to pretend he was equally pleased to meet him.

"And this is Andrew Wagtail."

"Nice to meet you," the taller man said, shaking his hand and smiling.

Snape settled into his armchair while the three men arranged themselves awkwardly on the couch. He called for his house-elf. "Tinny, please bring tea for our guests, and ask Soren to come downstairs."

"Yes, sir!" Tinny said, disappearing with a pop before reappearing moments later with a tray of tea and biscuits.

A few minutes later, Soren came down the stairs, his hair combed neatly to one side and wearing a smart white button-down and short navy pants with knee socks. He looked every bit like the son of an aristocrat and Snape allowed himself to feel slightly pleased.

Harry set his tea down and stood up, walking over to the little boy before kneeling down in front of him. "So good to see you, Soren!"

"Hi!" Soren smiled and jumped into Harry’s arms, giving him a heartfelt hug.

"How are you, is everything going well? You're looking quite sharp."

"Thank you! My father got me new clothes." Soren beamed. "I'm doing really well, I'm learning a lot and father got me a governess and her name is Ms. Cloutier and she's the best! Today is her day off but you should come back and meet her, she's so nice and she's teaching me all sorts of things. And we play outside everyday in the hedge maze. It's so much fun! I wanted to show you it but father said I couldn't." Soren could barely contain his excitement as the words tumbled out in a stream.

"Soren," Snape said in a warning tone. "That's enough."

Harry gave him a smile and put a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "That sounds brilliant. And you know you don't have to call me 'sir'."

Before Soren had a chance to reply, Snape chimed in from the armchair. "Yes he does, Mr. Potter. Please do not encourage him to follow in your insolent footsteps, I seem to remember you having quite a difficult time remembering how to properly address your elders when you were a child. I intend for my son to be remembered for his manners, not his cheek."

Harry was highly amused remembering how infuriated he'd made the man that day when he'd talked back to him so boldly in his sixth year: "There's no need to call me 'sir', Professor." He still prided himself on that one, it had been worth every minute of detention.

"Well, just know when he's not around, I don't care one bit." Harry whispered to Soren, giving him a little wink before standing up to his full height.

"Soren, please come and introduce yourself properly to our other guests."

Harry took the boy's hand and walked him back over to the couch where the two other Ministry officials were sitting and drinking tea.

"Soren, this is Mr. McLaggan and Mr. Wagtail."

Soren reached out his hand as his father had instructed him to do. "It's a pleasure to meet you," he said as he shook each of their hands.

"You've said your hellos, now you may be excused," Snape said calmly, but firmly as he sipped from his cup.

"Can't I stay for tea? Please, father?" Soren asked politely, taking Harry's hand once more, hoping he could spend a few more minutes with him.

"No, you may not. I have given you very clear instructions. Now say goodbye." He flashed the boy a dangerous look that let him know he better do as he was told, immediately. The man did not appreciate being disobeyed at the best of times, he certainly would not stand for it in front of other people.

Soren knew better than to beg and argue, he was absolutely certain his father would have no qualms about scolding him or even smacking him in front of their guests if he pushed him too far. His ears burned at the memory of what had happened the first time he met Marie. No, it was best just to do as he was told.

"Yes, sir." Soren turned back toward the adults on the couch. "It was nice to meet you, and really great to see you, Mr. Potter. I hope you'll come back soon! I have lots to show you and maybe you can meet Ms. Cloutier too."

"Of course, I'd love to." Harry said kindly, giving the boy's hand an affectionate squeeze before letting it go. "I'm really glad to see you doing so well. I'll see you later, kiddo."

Soren leaned in to give him another hug before casting a quick glance over at his father who indicated with a quick upward flick of his head that he should get moving, prompting him to hurry toward the stairs.

Not wanting to take any risks of Soren overhearing yet another conversation that wasn't meant for him, Snape waited for the boy to reach the second floor before casting a silencing charm around the parlor.

"Well, get on with it Mr. Potter, your message was vague, but I can assume that if you're showing up here with two other people from the Ministry that this is not going to be a very pleasant conversation."

"I'm really sorry, sir, but some things have happened since we've brought Soren into your care. There are some...legal complications."

"Such as?" Snape kept his voice calm but he could feel his body reacting, his heart rate quickening, the anxiety pulling at the bottom of his stomach. Nonetheless, he kept his face unreadable and his tone bored.

"We did our best to be as discreet as possible when we moved Soren into your care, but his name has begun appearing on the Registry of Magical Children as Soren Snape. Unfortunately one of the clerks noticed and took it up the chain, now there are a few people starting to ask questions."

"Shouldn't his name appear as Soren Kent? Severus Snape is legally dead. My new identity is legal and valid." Snape had submitted some masterfully forged documents when he took on his new identity and had been pleasantly pleased to have never been bothered by the Ministry again.

"I'm as surprised as you are, we did not anticipate that the registry would change to reflect his new name as soon as he was in the home with you. When I filed his paperwork registering him at this address, I submitted it all as Soren Kent. But the document has altered itself." Harry felt guilty for having to bring him this news.

"Perhaps I can help clarify," McLaggan interjected. "Right now it shows that a Soren Snape is living at this address, which as you know, is registered to Alistair Kent, a supposedly foreign-born wizard now residing in the UK. People are confused, as they have no reason to believe you are the biological parent, and yet, you have also not been vetted or through an adoption process that would give you legal rights to be Soren's guardian."

"Why doesn't it show his name as Soren Kent? That is his name, now. I am his father, my name is Kent. His name is Kent. I submitted to that ridiculous paternity potion."

"It's obvious the magic behind the Children's registry is identifying him as a Snape," McLaggan said, matter of factly. "Which as you might imagine is raising quite a few questions. For a few reasons."

"How can the Ministry recognize me as Kent, but Soren as a bloody Snape? It makes absolutely no sense."

"They are two very different magical documents, and it is obvious that the spells behind each of them are unique. When you...disappeared, I was the one who altered many of the documents for you, including having to do some pretty difficult charms and spellwork so that Severus Snape would officially appear deceased. I had some help, of course, but it was actually really difficult. Thankfully there was so much chaos after the war, no one was paying much attention and the magic on those documents was old. The Registry of Magical Children, however, is new, and unfortunately there is no way we can get our hands on it to alter it. Even if we did somehow manage to get access to it, I'm not sure any of us would have the magical capability to tamper with it."

"Speak for yourself," Snape mumbled angrily, refusing to acknowledge the part where Harry admitted to altering the documents on his behalf. How dare he! Arrogant fool. Snape would rather die than thank him, and the more Harry's words sank in, the more infuriated he became that the overgrown brat would dare do something like that for him. Why would he? Did he want Snape to fall at his feet in gratitude? Or did he just want to hold something over him. For the rest of his life. The audacity. The hubris. He stewed in indignation and tried to put it out of his mind.

"If you do not come forward to clear this up soon, the Ministry of Magical Children's Affairs will be on your doorstep to remove Soren whilst they launch a full investigation. If you wish to retain custody as Lord Kent, they will need to begin a thorough vetting process. During which time, Soren will likely be placed in a children's home until either you are approved or another suitable family is found for him."

A week ago, this would have been music to Snape's ears, he would have gladly handed the boy off to the Ministry, preferring to remain in his new identity and never having to deal with any of this again.

But now, he was feeling stuck. He knew if he allowed the Ministry to take custody, it would likely destroy the boy. And even if he preferred his simpler, solitary life, he realized he would never be able to go back to the way it was before. Not now. And what about Marie? She would be devastated. He could always pay her a year's worth of wages and send her on her way, but he would miss her presence in the manor. He knew he shouldn't even be considering it, but the choice wasn't clear...there was no way he was ever going to go back to being Severus Snape.

"That is the most absurd thing I have ever heard," Snape said. "Why on earth would you let them take him out of my custody, knowing full well I am his biological father."

"We wouldn't be able to stop them, sir. The problem is that very few of us know the truth, and we've done our best to conceal it for as long as possible, but Soren has come to the attention of a department that is outside of our full influence. We have two choices, either you come and speak to them yourself and tell them who you really are. Or you continue to live as Lord Kent, and submit to a whole adoption approval process, which may or may not be granted. There are people kicking up a fit right now that some mysterious wizard no one has heard of was given custody of an orphaned child without anyone doing a proper background check and approval process."

"Since when? No one seemed to give a toss where orphaned children went before. As you well know, Mr. Potter." Snape spat, unable to keep the vitriol out of his words.

"Yes, but a lot has changed since the war, Professor." Harry declined to mention that he was one of the biggest supporters of this new policy. Having grown up in a less than ideal home, he had stood as one of the champions for this law four years ago, when the Ministry of Magical Children was first created.

"So it appears."

"There were too many magical children left without parents after the war and following a few...unfortunate incidents...the Ministry put together several new regulations. Anyone choosing to foster or adopt a magical child has to submit to a full review process to be approved. It can take months, even years in some cases. They don't want vulnerable magical children to be exploited or harmed."

"So what, you propose that he will just go into care until then? Absolutely not." Snape was suitably horrified by the thought. As someone who grew up in a hell hole of childhood existence, even that seemed preferable to being in care. As much abuse as he had to deal with, at least he didn't feel abandoned. Unloved, sometimes, but he couldn't imagine how much worse he'd have felt to know that he had living parents who just didn't want him. That was far crueler than enduring beatings from a drunk father.

"We would make sure he was in safe hands," said Wagtail.

Snape just glared at the Hufflepuff, whom he now remembered as one of the more inept prefects he'd seen in all of his days. "I refuse to have my child be ripped away from his home. Again. He is just starting to settle in and feel safe here, do you have any idea what it would do to him if he were carted off by the Ministry. For the second time in so many weeks."

"The other option is that you claim him as your son, but that means that we would have to undo the registry of your death. It is a valid option."

Snape shot daggers at McLaggan. He's as useless as his idiot son.

"I'm sorry, sir. I really did try to do everything I could to protect your new identity...but Soren has complicated things," said Harry.

"You lied to me, Mr. Potter." Snape was livid now, pointing a sharp finger in his direction. "You told me when you brought him here that there was nowhere else for him to go and that wizarding law demanded that I take custody. When in fact that was complete nonsense. And now we are in a legal quagmire that is going to end up destroying one or both of our lives. Either way, a little boy's future is going to be decimated. This is your doing! What kind of manipulative games are you playing?"

Harry looked slightly ashamed. "I'm truly sorry. I honestly believed this would be the best place for him, sir. He deserved to be with family, not an afterthought in the system. If you knew what I knew, you wouldn't want that for him either. I was thinking of Soren's best interest. And even though you were reluctant at first, I knew you would eventually grow to care for him and you'd be able to protect him better than anyone. As you clearly have done."

"How dare you!" Snape slammed his hand down on the armrest and stood up so he could tower over Harry, sneering into his face. "Your audacity has no limits, Potter. Who do you think you are to presume you know what is best for me or for Soren. Is this some kind of sick joke? An opportunity to take revenge on me for some perceived slight in your school days?"

"I would never do that, sir. You forget, I know how much you sacrificed for me, and what you did to protect me. I honestly didn't think the Ministry would ever know. I did my best to bury things the same way I did for you 6 years ago because I wanted you to live your life in peace, you deserved it. You have no idea what I've risked to keep your identity hidden all of these years. I did that for you. Because you deserved a new life, a happy life. I wanted that for you...I still do. There was no way to know that his name would show up like that."

"Enough." Snape scoffed, simmering rage in the edge of his voice. "You have put me in an impossible situation. There must be another way out of this. I refuse to accept that these are my only options."

"I'm afraid there's not," said McLaggan. "We've been looking for days to find another solution."

"Well. Look. Harder." Snape said, enunciating every single syllable. "I want to see every law, referendum, memo related to this. There must be a solution you're missing."

"That is why I brought them today. I figured you would want all of the information. Mr McLaggan is an expert in magical law, and Wagtail works as a liaison to the Children's Ministry— he knows their policies and their people better than anyone. And I trust both of them. Implicitly." Harry was glad he'd had the foresight not to have this conversation alone.

"Please, Lord Kent, sit down. We'll go through everything together and hopefully you'll be able to make an informed decision when we're through." McLaggan guided Snape back to his armchair, gently coaxing him to sit back down.

Snape felt defeated in the moment, allowing himself to be settled...but he was determined to find another way. Neither of these two options were acceptable to him. "How much time do we have?" he asked, resigned.

"I think I can buy us another week. Maybe." Harry looked over at Snape and felt sympathy for him. "You know, it wouldn't be the end of the world just to come forward and admit who you are. You could still live the life you're having now, no one would bother you, I'd make sure of it."

Snape narrowed his eyes and dropped his voice, spewing venom through clenched teeth. "As if I would ever believe another word out of your filthy lying mouth, Potter. Besides, I refuse to have my son go through life carrying that despicable name. I do not wish for him to be taunted and bullied at school, or denied opportunities later in life for being the progeny of the evil, traitorous Severus Snape. He is innocent and kind, he deserves so much better than that."

By the end of his tirade, Snape was truly despondent. He couldn't stand the thought of Soren carrying the burden of his own sins. He'd thought when he let Snape die, the shame would die along with him. But it didn't. Perhaps Soren would be better off in the Ministry's care after all. A nice family to adopt him, maybe with other kids he could grow up with, a mother and a father who loved him. Properly.

"If I let the Ministry take him, can you promise me that his true identity would be protected? That no one outside of the Ministry would ever know his real name. I want everything changed. Legally, properly. Permanently."

"It is definitely possible," said Wagtail. "There was a lot of concern for the children of Death Eaters being targeted after the war, one of the reasons these regulations were put in place. Once an adoption arrangement is made, all of the documents are sealed, and the records are changed to reflect their new name. It doesn't guarantee no one will ever know, but the Ministry makes every effort to protect the most vulnerable children. No one would dare leak it."

Snape nodded, leaning further back in his chair, the decision now becoming more difficult. "I want him protected at all costs. No ties to Severus Snape, whatsoever."

"Sir, what are you talking about? You can't really be considering this!" Harry was shocked that Snape saw himself this way. Surely he had seen the press tour he'd done on his behalf when the war ended. He'd made sure everyone knew the truth, that Severus Snape was a freedom fighter and a martyr, a double-agent who sacrificed himself for the cause. There were numerous articles in the Daily Prophet, praising his contributions for months. "You're a legend you know. People revere you, respect you. No one thinks you're a traitor."

"Do not mock me, Mr. Potter, I do not have the energy to deal with your infantile attempts to goad me," he said dismissively. Broken, he sat up and steeled his voice. "Now show me the papers. All of them. There must be another way."

McLaggan put his briefcase on the table and opened the locks. "This may take a while."

Upstairs, Soren was getting bored. He'd tried entertaining himself with some books, but he couldn't read well enough and it wasn't that fun all alone. He'd taken a short nap and then walked down to the classroom for a bit, but there was nothing really fun to do by himself. He'd counted the money in his bank a few times, but there were only so many times he found that entertaining. He desperately wanted to go outside but it had been storming for the last hour and despite his begging, Tinny had refused to take him out in the rain, per his father's instructions. And there was no way he'd dare disobey Tinny again.

He was extremely tempted to know what was going on downstairs, but he knew if his father caught him eavesdropping, he'd be in huge trouble, so he laid on his bed for a few minutes talking with his rabbit before his mind drifted to his wand.

For several minutes he sat there debating whether he should pull it out and play with it. It's not playing, he reminded himself. It's practicing. That was how he justified it to himself. If he wanted to be a great wizard like his father, he had to start practicing now. Besides, his father had said he was doing spells at home way before he went to Hogwarts, why should it be different for him? Maybe because he said I was to never ever touch a wand. But as long as he was careful...

Soren opened his door and creeped down the hallway to make sure his father was still downstairs. He couldn't hear anything, but from the top of the stairs he could see shadows moving in the parlor below so he knew there were still people there.

After tiptoeing quietly back to his room, he softly closed the door. He walked immediately to the wardrobe and reached back until he felt the bag, his heart beating loudly in his ears as the adrenaline surged in his body. Fumbling around, his fingers finally brushed against the smooth spruce, the feel of it sending a surge of magic up his arm. He leaned forward and strained until he could wrap his tiny fingers around it, reveling in the way it felt in his hand. As soon as he grasped it properly, he could feel his magic vibrating around it, making him feel strong, almost powerful. It was intoxicating.

He took it over to his bed and started with his usual "routine"— some lumos and nox (he only did aguamenti over the sink now, just in case), a little leviosa and he'd been practicing summoning things around his room with Accio although he could still only do light objects that were close by, and not consistently.

Ever since he'd seen his governess enlarge the coins, he'd wanted to try it. First he tried to enlarge his rabbit, and failed a few times before he realized he didn't actually know the counter-charm to shrink him back again, which would definitely have people asking questions. So he spent a few more minutes practicing his summoning skills. He managed to summon a quill and a sock, but not much else, and he quickly became bored again.

The one spell he was dying to try was the one that would cause a stream of fire to shoot out of his wand. He'd watched his father and Tinny do it several times, but it wasn't until he saw his governess do it that he properly heard the incantation.

After a few more boring minutes of doing "easy" spells he knew how to do, he gave into temptation and walked over to the small hearth on the left side of his room. He pointed his wand at the logs sitting in the fireplace and waited a moment, wondering if he should really try it...he debated, but ultimately he couldn't stop himself. Incindio! he said confidently, copying the wand movements he'd seen from his father. Nothing happened.

He drew up his breath and repeated it, louder this time, swishing his wand with more determination. Nothing.

He tried a third time and then a fourth, but on the fifth try he could feel his magic pulsing along with his frustration and he gritted his teeth and yelled incendio, channeling all of his energy. The moment the word left his mouth, an enormous flame leapt out of his wand that was so powerful he fell backward and lost control, his flailing wand now shooting a stream of fire all over the wall, the floor and his curtains, his room quickly becoming engulfed in flames.

He scrambled to his feet and grabbed the wand, attempting an aguamenti to put out the flames but the small stream of water was completely useless as the fire raged through his room.

Panic began to overtake him and he grabbed his rabbit from the bed before that too went up in flames. He ran out of his room, his wand in one hand, his rabbit in the other. He knew he needed his father, but he was terrified he would murder him if he knew he'd been playing with magic. He dashed to the classroom to hide his wand before sprinting for the stairs, passing a shocked and screaming Tinny on the way.

"Father, FATHER!" Soren screamed as he ran down the steps, pure terror on his face.

Snape looked up suddenly to see Soren running toward him in a panic, and his heart rate immediately quickened. He stood from his chair, ignoring the three other men in the parlor, swishing his wand to undo the silencing charm.

Soren screamed out again, "Father, help! Fire! There's a fire!"

"What, where?"

"My room is on fire!" Soren was ashen and he was shaking, his eyes wide with fear as he grabbed at his father’s robes in desperation. 

Just then Tinny appeared, panicking and coughing. "Master, you must come quickly. I has tried to put it out, but we needs more help! Too much smoke!"

"I'll be right there. Tinny, do not go back in there without me." Snape said firmly as Tinny nodded his head, coughing again pitifully.

"Soren, stay right here. Do NOT move, do you understand me?" Snape grabbed Soren by the arm and looked at him in the eyes as the acrid smell of burning fabric and melting carpet hit him in the face. He looked up to see smoke at the top of the stairs. "Stay here. Promise me you'll obey me."

Soren nodded, "I promise," tears running down his face as the four men bounded up the steps to the West wing, wands at the ready, Tinny following behind them.

Within a few minutes, the men had the fire under control. It had singed the walls, burned up the curtains completely, and destroyed part of the bed and most of the carpet, but there was nothing that couldn't be repaired or replaced.

Now that the fire was out, Snape opened the window to let in some fresh air. His throat and lungs burned slightly, as he had been slow to cast a bubblehead charm in his haste to get upstairs.

"Wow, that was intense." Harry said, wiping the sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand, smears of soot on his face, his lips dry, the lenses of his glasses opaque with ash and fog.

"Accidental magic," said McLaggan, knowingly. "I do not miss those days. When Cormac was 9 he once turned our dining table into a giant marshmallow because we wouldn't let him have more pudding. But this...from a seven year-old? You certainly have your hands full."

"Perhaps, gentlemen, we can continue our conversation another day." Snape summoned several flannels and soaked each of them with cool water from his wand before handing them to his guests and wiping his own face. Using the opportunity to breathe down his blood pressure. "I think this is an appropriate time to end things."

"Yes of course. I think we made good progress today, I’ll reach out to you tomorrow, we can maybe find another time to meet in the next few days," Harry said.

Snape nodded his head at Harry, refraining from any eye contact. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have a traumatized little boy I need to take care of."

Harry was quietly impressed, he'd known Snape was the protective type but he was seeing a whole different side of it with his son. Even if Snape was furious with him at the moment, he didn't regret his decision to bring Soren here. It might get a bit messy, but it was obviously the right place for him to be. He'd already had an inkling that Soren had inherited his father's powerful magic, and there was no one else who'd be able to help him learn to use it like Severus Snape. Regardless of what the man wanted to believe about himself.

As soon as they got downstairs, the three wizards quickly took their leave and exited through the floo, leaving Snape alone with Soren, who was sitting balled up on the couch clutching his rabbit and sobbing, rocking back and forth slightly.

Snape sat down next to him and put a reassuring hand on his shoulder, but before he knew what was happening, Soren had launched himself across his lap, with his head on his thigh and his thin, fail body wracked with sobs. "Shh, everything is alright. It's over. Everything is alright."

Soren just cried into him, terrified by what he'd just witnessed and even more ashamed he had been the cause of it, he couldn't bear to lift up his head.

For several long minutes they stayed like that, Snape with a reassuring hand on the boy's back, patting him rhythmically while he cried.

"Are you hurt anywhere or just scared?" Snape finally asked.

"I'm not hurt," Soren finally choked out between sobs. "My room is gone, everything is burned," he said, crying even harder. "I ruined it. I'm sorry!"

"All of it can be fixed or replaced. You, on the other hand, cannot. Now can you sit up and tell me what happened?" He tapped Soren gently on the hip.

"I don't know," Soren said, wailing as he lifted his head, clutching his rabbit to his chest for dear life. “It happened so fast! I’m sorrrrry” 

"Were you playing with matches?" Snape took the boy’s chin in his hand and gave him a stern look. He and Tinny always lit the fireplace with their wands, but Snape kept matches around the manor just in case. He had grown up poor in a council flat where he was often freezing to the bone and he had an irrational fear of being unable to light a fireplace if he needed to, even if his magic was drained or his wand was broken. It was probably silly, but it gave him peace of mind. He hadn't thought to remove them when Soren came, realizing the manor was far from child-proofed.

"No, sir. I promise!"

"Then tell me what you were doing when it happened. It is not unusual for wizards your age to have bouts of accidental magic, particularly if you were having intense emotions."

"I think it was that," Soren lied, diverting his gaze and fidgeting with his rabbit's ears, praying his father wouldn't see right through him. "I was mad that Tinny wouldn't let me go outside to play and I was bored. I didn't know that would happen, I'm sorry!" He started sobbing again.

Snape could see he was truly upset and was blaming himself, working himself up. "You need to breathe, Soren. You're unharmed, that is what is important. Now take a deep breath before you make yourself ill."

Soren took a few deep breaths and then fell back into his father, it was the most physical contact he had ever had from the man and he craved it, desperately.

"I'm sorry," he wailed into his father's side, his small arms wrapping tightly around him, hoping the man would return the embrace.

"You do not need to apologize for something you cannot help. Accidental magic happens to most witches and wizards, particularly those with strong magic. It is ultimately a positive sign that your magic is intact." Snape was uncomfortable, but he extended one arm and laid it on Soren's back, resuming his reassuring pats in an attempt to calm him.

The guilt was making Soren feel sick, but he didn't want to ruin this perfect moment by telling the truth. He wasn't an idiot. Instead he soaked in every touch and every soft word. 

"Now where am I going to sleep?" Soren lifted his head up, his face all swollen and blotchy.

"I can repair your room in a matter of minutes, there is nothing to worry about. Even if I could not, there are plenty of other rooms in the manor. That is the least of my worries right now."

Just then, the floo roared and Marie stepped out, her hair slightly more disheveled, her arms full of shopping bags, and a huge smile on her face. Immediately she could see something was wrong.

"What happened? Is everyone alright?" She dropped her bags onto the floor and rushed over to Soren, where he was curled up against the side of his father's chest, tears still streaming down his face.

"We had a little episode of accidental magic just now. Soren's room caught fire, and he is scared. I am trying to reassure him that this is perfectly normal, many magical children have similar episodes."

"Oh Soren, darling, I am so so sorry. You didn't get hurt, did you?"

Soren shook his head before pressing his face further into his father's body.

"That is so scary, I'm so sorry." Marie sat down next to them, reaching out to put a hand on the little boy’s back, smoothing it down his shirt as a fresh wave of tears came over him.

"He'll be alright, he's just frightened."

A new feeling blossomed in Marie watching the man comfort his frightened son. She knew he wasn't the most affectionate type, so seeing him soothing Soren so gently made her heart swell. She was starting to worry this was more than a little crush and a fun bit of sexual tension. Don't even think about it, Marie. You need to quit with the Jane Austen books, you've lost all sense of reality.

They sat like this until Soren's tears stopped and he fell asleep on his father's lap, surrounded by the only two people he had in the world.

"Would you mind helping me repair his room, Ms. Cloutier? I'm sure it would go much more quickly with the two of us, and perhaps you have some ideas for how it might be a more...comfortable space for a child."

"Yes, of course!"

"You do have your wand on you, I hope?" He gave her an eyebrow raise for good measure.

Marie pulled her wand out. "I do. I told you I learned my lesson." She flashed him a smile.

"Good girl."

Those words caused her stomach to clench and a flush ran up her neck. Seriously Marie?

"I'm going to try to get up without waking him, I'll leave him to rest on the sofa until dinner."

Marie watched as the man slowly and gently lifted Soren, laying him back down on the couch. With a swish of his wand, a blanket came flying into the room and he snatched it out of the air before laying it on top of the boy.

Upstairs the two of them made quick work of repairing Soren's room. Marie had seen the man perform some impressive magic before (not to mention the flying), but watching him do so much complicated spellwork so quickly left her awestruck. Who is this man? She was sure she'd never seen another witch or wizard with the power, control, and speed he had with his wand.

Snape was also enjoying watching Marie put her touches on the room, and she was truly gifted, particularly with transfiguration. She made creative use of some lesser known spells to improve upon some of his work. He'd fix something, and she'd transfigure it into something slightly better. He'd known she was a clever witch, but it was the first time he had seen her do more than simple spells.

"Well done, Ms. Cloutier, I think Soren will be very pleased with his new room." He looked around in satisfaction. "I can see now how you aced your O.W.L.'s, your transfiguration skills certainly are Outstanding."

Marie had to admit, it looked pretty good, and his words of approval melted her to the core. She'd turned it into a real children's bedroom. Nothing tacky, of course, but with a few brighter colors and furniture, including a little table where Soren could sit to color or draw (or do schoolwork, as she told Lord Kent). She tried to put little educational touches with an explorer theme, putting a charmed map mural on one wall, and some pictures of animals she knew he liked. In one corner, she made him his own little reading nook with small bookshelves, even transfiguring a child-size armchair that looked heavily inspired by the one Lord Kent was always sitting in. She finished off by charming the ceiling so that at night it would twinkle, something she knew Soren would really enjoy. Overall, she was quite proud of herself.

"Thank you, Lord Kent. Your wand work is incredible, by the way, how did you learn to cast spells so quickly?" She knew she sounded like a doting fan, but she couldn't help it, she was really impressed.

"Practice, Ms. Cloutier. Hard-work, dedication, and practice. Which is why I want to impart these virtues on Soren. Even a wizard with mediocre magical ability can be exceptional with enough discipline and hard-work."

"Yes, I agree."

"Well, that might be a first," Snape replied sarcastically, tucking his wand away and readjusting his sleeves. "I'll be honest, I've been quite concerned about Soren's magic because his mother struggled even with the most basic spells, but the fire he produced today was quite impressive. I've seen other children make things explode or create a small flame here and there, but I've never seen a child his age create anything like that. It could mean he is dealing with some very powerful magic indeed. We will have to be quite careful." Snape didn't want to sound like he was gloating, but it was hard to hide the pride in his voice.

"I agree. I'm sure you'll find it silly, but I've seen some studies about using emotional regulation tools to help prevent outbursts of accidental magic. The results were excellent, but it does involve mindfulness tools like deep breathing, checking in with your body, and relaxation exercises. All things I'm sure you don't believe in." Marie waited for him to mock her.

"Not at all. I think mindfulness and being able to control one's emotions are the foundation of being able to harness the full extent of one's magic. I employ them often. In the past, these tactics were critical to my ability to perform certain skills. I think it is an excellent idea to begin this with Soren as soon as possible. If he can learn how to do this effectively while he's young, he will have a definite advantage over many of his peers when he begins to practice real magic."

"Wow, I didn't expect that." Marie said, lifting her eyebrows in surprise. "I'll definitely start doing that with him."

"There is a lot about me you don't know, Ms. Cloutier." He paused for a moment to let that sink. "Now, shall we go down for supper?"

When they tried to wake Soren, he moaned and cried and refused to get up.

"Maybe we should just let him sleep if he needs it, that kind of magic might have really drained him."

"He will be up all night. And he needs to eat." Snape tried again to rouse Soren. "Soren, wake up. It is time for dinner."

"I don't feel well. I want to sleep." He didn't even open his eyes, instead rolling on the couch and pressing his face into the back cushions.

"I think he'll be fine for one night." Marie put a hand on Soren's forehead to feel for a fever but it was cool. "Does anything hurt, Soren?"

"My whole body. Please let me sleep," he said, starting to sob again. "Please father, please."

Snape stood over him for another minute trying to decide what to do. He was not one who would ever give in to a tantrum, but that's not what this was. He could see that Soren was not himself, he was still paler than usual and clearly so exhausted he could barely keep his eyes open. Snape pulled out his wand and ran a quick diagnostic spell, but there was nothing physically wrong with the boy, he was just drained and coming down from a traumatic event.

"Fine. I don't want him making himself ill, I'll take him to bed." Snape hoped he wasn't setting a bad precedent, but maybe Marie was right and the magic had drained him, and as a small child it could take time to recover. "But I'm going to give him a restorative potion and something to help him stay asleep. Hopefully he'll sleep until morning and wake up refreshed."

Snape retrieved the potions from his lab before returning to the couch, lifting Soren into his arms, and carrying him effortlessly up the stairs to his room. He laid him on his new bed and the boy curled up right away, still shaking slightly. One at a time, Snape gently removed each of his shoes and set them carefully at the foot of the bed.

With a swish of his wand, Snape transfigured the boy's clothes into pajamas and he helped him under the covers, making sure his rabbit was still nestled in his arms. He sat for a moment on the side of the bed and looked down at the little face, seeing more pieces of himself in the long dark lashes, the shape of his chin, even his ears. It was a bizarre feeling to see himself in this tiny little human. His gut wrenched when he imagined how the boy would react when the Ministry came to get him and he quickly pushed the thought from his mind.

He pulled out the two vials and attempted to get Soren to sit up, but ultimately ended up kind of pouring the potions down his throat while he held him upright, limp like a rag doll. Soren complained slightly but didn't make a huge fuss before lying right back down.

"Stay in bed. Do not even think of getting up before morning." He reached a hand out and pulled the covers up slightly before leaving the boy to sleep. "Goodnight, Soren."

Soren didn't respond, he just closed his eyes and fell back into a deep, deep sleep.

Chapter Text

While Soren slept, Severus and Marie retreated to the dining room to enjoy a supper alone, the first time the two of them had done so together. Without the boy’s excited chattering—and after what had been a rather dramatic afternoon for Snape—the energy was subdued, almost somber.

Snape took his usual place at the head of the table and began pouring two small glasses of wine. ”How was your day off, did you enjoy yourself?”

“It was lovely. I mostly just caught up with a few friends, had some lunch, and spent way too much on new clothes and some books and a few things for the classroom.”

“Which reminds me, let me know how much you spent today so I can reimburse you,” Snape said matter of factly as he handed her a wine glass.

“Please, Lord Kent, that won’t be necessary. These were personal items, you don’t need to pay for them.”

Snape gave her a serious look, a fork paused in his hand. “I told you I would cover all of your expenses whilst you are here, and I meant that. Just tell me how much you spent so that I can deposit the money in your account.” He stared for a moment before he stabbed at a piece of food and placed in his mouth. 

“No, Lord Kent, absolutely not. I’m not going to let you do that.” Marie felt embarrassed, she’d been with some of her closest girlfriends and had bought some rather unprofessional items of clothing. She’d had a few glasses of Prosecco with lunch and went a little bit crazy. Some sexy lingerie, some clothes she might go out in, a new pair of heels to go with her outfit, a book of spells for hair and make-up. And then a few small things for Soren she was sure Lord Kent wouldn’t entirely approve of like some kitchen and baking supplies for the classroom and a children’s play snitch he could chase around the garden.

“I beg your pardon, Ms. Cloutier? You’re not going to let me do that?” His tone was indignant and he followed it with a few disapproving clicks of his tongue and a slow shake of his head. “While I may on occasion find your cheek quite charming, I do not appreciate being told ‘no’ in such a manner, and I certainly do not need you to let me do anything.” 

“Sorry,” Marie said, realizing she had obviously pushed one of his buttons. “But really, I don’t need your money.”

“Don’t you?” He clinked his fork and knife down on his plate and paused for dramatic effect, staring down at her until he was satisfied he had her full attention. “You are really trying my patience, Ms. Cloutier. Perhaps we need a visit to my study so that I may refresh your memory on the terms and conditions of your employment. I believe I clearly stated that all of your expenses are to be taken care of whilst you are here, and that includes any clothes or personal items. You do not need to detail or justify any of your purchases, you are —of course—entitled to your privacy, but I am asking you to simply give me a number so that I can reimburse you as we agreed. If you refuse to do so, I will deposit 1000 galleons and hope I haven’t undershot it.  Am I clear?”

“Yes, sir.” Marie said, feeling somewhat chastised, but annoyed. “It was probably just around 150 galleons.” Liar, it was nearly 300 galleons. But she didn’t want him to think she was going out on shopping sprees with his money.

“Now that wasn’t so difficult, now was it?” Snape stared at her before dropping his gaze to his food, pausing for a moment before he let his words flow out in his more authoritative patronizing tone, one he reserved for particularly swotty students when he was at the end of his rope.

“I refuse to go through this every time you need or want something. You told me before you took this position that you were saving your money for a very worthy cause. One of which was that I would cover all of your expenses for the duration of your employment. Every sickle. You are providing an invaluable service to Soren and myself, and I would like for this arrangement to feel equally beneficial to you. I also respect that you have future financial goals you are working toward and I would like to be supportive of that.”

“Thank you, Lord Kent. I really appreciate it, but honestly, these weren’t things I needed, just some fun purchases. I really don’t expect you to cover the cost of such frivolous things.”

Snape set down his wine glass dramatically while he closed his eyes and exhaled with annoyance. “I will not sit here and argue with you over the difference between a necessity and a frivolity, I could not care less either way. I certainly don’t want you to go without things or insist on a life of austerity simply because you do not want to spend my money. It is absurd. There is more money in my vault than I could ever possibly spend in a lifetime, or in four generations. Now that is the end of this discussion, unless you wish to take it upstairs and continue it over my desk.”

Before Marie could express her shock or outrage, Snape stared right into her eyes. “So that you may read the details of your contract. I keep a copy of it in the top drawer of my desk, along with a very sturdy wooden ruler should one need further assistance.” He paused again for effect. “I find it helps to isolate a particular line of text when one wishes to emphasize the details in the fine print.”

“No, sir. I understand.” Marie said quickly, putting all of her focus onto her food as she loaded her fork, trying to suppress the blush that was creeping from her neck to her face.

“I’m glad we understand each other,” Snape said, using that tone that he knew drove her insane because she both loathed it and it did things to her. 

Marie shoved another bite of food in her mouth so she wouldn’t say something she regretted.

“Now then, if you’re done being petulant, I would like to talk to you about Soren’s reading. It is more abysmal than I realized and I would like to come up with a plan to remediate this as soon as possible. Perhaps you can walk me through the most current evidence-based approaches to this. Are you concerned he has a disability of some sort, or he’s just far behind for his age? I would like to hear your professional opinion.” Snape set his fork and knife down carefully and gave her his rapt attention. 

“Oh, well. I don’t think there’s any reason to think he’s got a learning disability, not at this stage. He just hasn’t had enough exposure to reading in his previous home. It sounds like his mother was not very literate, and since he didn’t go to school, he just hasn’t had enough practice. He’s not really all that behind, there are several countries in Europe where students don’t even begin their formal education until 7. We will just need to be consistent in reading to him and encouraging him to read. He should get better with practice. But the most important thing we can do is remain encouraging. If he starts to think he has a problem, he will internalize it and it will slow his progress.”

Snape nodded along. “I see. I will think about ways we can integrate more time for reading.”

“He’ll get there, Lord Kent. Just patience and consistency, and plenty of practice.” Marie was a jumble of feelings. One minute he was scolding her like a ’petulant’ child, the next he addressed to her like a respected professional in her field. She barely had time to feel one thing before he jerked her feelings in another direction entirely. For him, it was effortless, but she felt constantly off-balance.

“Indeed.” Snape ran his thumb over his lip in quiet contemplation. 

The two sat in awkward silence for a few minutes before Marie spoke up. “I didn’t get a chance to ask, aside from the fiasco at the end of the day, how did everything else go? Did Soren miss me?”

“Your absence was keenly felt, Ms. Cloutier. But somehow, Soren and I managed,” he replied dryly.

Marie let out a small laugh. “I was barely gone half the day and the manor was nearly burnt to a pile of ashes.”

“It was merely one small room. Not even 5% of the manor. Really, Ms. Cloutier, there’s no need for melodrama.” 

Marie knew that he was amused, his tone changed just enough that she could tell he was enjoying himself again. “I’m sorry. I just can’t believe something like that happened in the few hours I was away. Poor Soren. I hope he gets some good rest tonight and feels better tomorrow. I’ve already got a plan for doing more mindfulness with him. Maybe we’ll even start our day with some meditation and yoga tomorrow. A little ‘salutation to the sun’ always gets the blood flowing. ”

Snape raised an eyebrow. “I’m pleased you’ll be incorporating mindfulness, just don’t get too off-track. I’m raising a future wizard, not a Buddhist monk.”

“Hey, there’s nothing wrong with that! Plenty of magical people have made spectacular spiritual leaders. I could see Soren enjoying life in an ashram somewhere in the Himalayas.”

“Absolutely not. He is full of potential, I don’t want him wasting it away in a loincloth somewhere on the other side of the world. For Merlin’s sake, don’t plant any ideas, Ms. Cloutier. He could be so much more…A healer, Minister of Magic, a brilliant potioneer running the greatest Apothecary in Europe. I want him to have big dreams, there should be no limitations to what he can achieve.”

“If that’s what he wants…but what matters is that he feels fulfilled and happy and follows his dreams. Success should never be defined by other people, it’s about being true to yourself and your own goals. A person doesn’t need a special title or award or degree to be successful in life. Soren should know that he is the only one who can define success. Besides, isn’t that what you told me? That he shouldn’t seek external validation, it is a ‘fool’s errand.”  

Marie reveled in throwing the man’s words back at him. He had opined about how he loathed encouragement and validation, that it should all come from within, and yet here he was now daring to tell her that his measure of success for his son was a certain profession or title. 

Snape paused for a minute and allowed her words to soak in. He had high hopes for Soren, he wanted him to achieve all the things that he never could because he started his life at a complete disadvantage and by the time he figured out what was truly important to him, it was too late. He’d ruined his own future, smeared his own name and he knew he would never be able to regain any semblance of respect after that. He was tainted, permanently, for a stupid decision he’d made as a damaged, overly emotional teenager who’d desperately wanted to feel valued and accepted…and as a result, it had robbed him of his hopes and dreams. He wanted better for his son. He was determined for Soren to have everything he could ever need to succeed in his greatness, to be whatever he wanted to be, but most of all, respected.  

“Very astute, Ms. Cloutier. I stand corrected.” Snape set his napkin down after dabbing at his mouth. “Nonetheless, I will insist that he excels in his educational pursuits, so that he will always have options. No door will be closed to him unless he closes it himself.”

“If you want to join us for some yoga and meditation this week, you’re welcome to. I’m sure Soren would enjoy that.” Marie tried to imagine the man in something other than his thick wool coat and heavy robes. She could tell he had a lean, strong body under all of those layers of clothes, but the image of him in yoga pants was more than she could handle and she had to throw a hand over her mouth when she realized she’d let out an audible laugh at the idea of it. 

Snape raised an eyebrow. “Perhaps the next time you are meditating, Ms. Cloutier, you should work on closing your mind a bit more, you broadcast half of your thoughts so clearly, one doesn’t even need to be a Legilamens to know what’s going on in your head.”

Marie’s face burned from her neck to the tips of her ears. “Oh, I…um…”

Snape smirked, he would never read someone’s thoughts purposely without their consent (well, at least not outside of the context of war), but Marie telegraphed nearly every thought directly onto her face. “It’s a good thing I banished those playing cards yesterday, you’d be an absolute hazard at the poker table. Best just to stick with teaching, I think.”

“You’re probably right. But you really ought to give yoga pants a try, they’re extremely comfortable.”

“I think that depends highly on how one defines comfort, Ms. Cloutier. And I can assure you, for me, it will never be a thin layer of cotton-lycra blend clinging to my lower body.”

Too bad. “Well, the invitation stands. You are welcome to join us, in your thick wool suits, anytime.”

“We’ll see.”

The next morning, Marie went in to wake Soren, but he refused to get up. She tried everything she could, being as gentle as possible, but short of physically dragging him out of bed, there wasn’t anything else she could do. Finally she went downstairs without him. 

“Where is Soren?” Snape asked, clearly displeased. 

“He’s still in bed. I think something is really wrong, Lord Kent, he won’t get up. He says he doesn’t feel well. I tried, really. I don’t think he’s faking it.”

“I’ll be the judge of that.” Snape stood up, folding the Daily Prophet sharply and tossing it on his side table. “Please start your breakfast without me, Ms. Cloutier, I need to go deal with my son.” Snape was battling between being irritated and truly concerned. At this point Soren knew better than to try to skip a meal or dare refuse to get out of bed, so he was inclined to believe something wasn’t right. 

When he walked in the room, Soren was still wrapped tightly in the duvet, his eyes closed. 

“Soren, you will get up immediately. It is a school day, and you are already late for breakfast but I will not have you late for class. Now that’s enough, up you get.” He pulled the covers back causing Soren to moan and reach for them. 

When he didn’t make any effort to get up, Snape tried a harsher approach. “You have until the count of three to get up from the bed. If you do not, you will be starting your day with a sore backside. Get. Up.”

Soren still didn’t stir. 

“One.” Snape waited, dragging it out. “Two.”

Nothing.

“If I get to three, you will go directly over my knee. This is your last chance.”

“I don’t feel good. My tummy hurts. I’m tired,” Soren cried into his pillow. “Please father.”

Snape reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I will run a diagnostic spell, but if it comes back that you are well, you will get out of bed and go to school. Immediately. I refuse to entertain this nonsense any longer.”

Soren nodded his head and rolled over toward his father as he ran his wand swiftly over his small body.

“Just as I thought, absolutely nothing wrong with you. Now that’s enough, I’ve indulged you long enough this morning. Up you get.” Snape stood up and reached for one of Soren’s arms.

“No!” Soren dodged his father’s hand and rolled away. “I don’t feel well!! I feel sick and my body feels tired, I can’t get up. Please father,” Soren begged as soon as his father grabbed his arm, he jerked away, crying deeply. “No, I’m telling the truth, I don’t feel well. Please, father, please!” He collapsed into his pillow in high pitched wails. 

As soon as Snape heard that sound, he immediately let go of Soren’s arm and reached down to feel the boy’s forehead, concerned that something was truly wrong. Was it possible that his magic had drained him that much? Most children his age didn’t have enough of a developed magical core to have this kind of somatic effect. Not to mention, he had given him a restoration potion that, coupled with a full night of sleep, should have easily remedied the issue overnight. But there was no other reason Soren would do this. He’d seen a thousand children try to get out of going to class, but it didn’t look like this. Not to mention, Soren loved Ms. Cloutier and seemed to enjoy his time in the classroom. Something felt wrong and he recoiled, his brow furrowed, staring at the crying boy in confusion. 

He let several seconds pass before he gathered himself and spoke. “Fine. I will send Tinny up with breakfast, but you will stay in bed and rest today. If you even think of getting up or playing around, I will take that as a sign that you are having me on, and you will be a very sorry little boy. I mean it, Soren.”

Soren took a big, stuttering breath, before letting out another sob. He pulled the duvet up, clutching his rabbit and settling back under the covers, his back to his father.

Snape watched for another minute before closing the curtains and darkening the room. “Just rest. I’ll be back to check on you later.”

Suitably concerned, he put a hand on the boy’s back to try to comfort him, but when Soren rolled further away, he pulled back, unsure of what else he should do. After waiting another few seconds, he turned around to leave.

When Snape came down alone, Marie was truly worried. “What’s going on, is he sick? That’s not like him at all.”

“No idea. The diagnostic spell isn’t showing a thing. Against my better judgment, I told him to stay in bed, but if this continues beyond this afternoon, I will have him seen by a healer.” Snape refused to admit that he had been completely destabilized by the whole interaction, Soren was clearly unwell but he didn’t understand what was going on, and he didn’t know what else he should do. “I’m sure it is nothing more than an elaborate tantrum, there’s certainly nothing physically wrong with him.”

“Maybe I should go check on him,” Marie offered, standing, leaving her breakfast half-eaten on her plate, completely unable to focus on eating when she was so worried.. 

Snape reached out and grabbed her arm. “Sit. Finish your breakfast, Ms. Cloutier. Let him sleep for a little while longer, and then you can check on him. I’ve got some work I need to take care of, but I’d like you to keep me informed if anything changes.” 

Marie sat back down and picked at her plate but she was sure she wouldn’t be able to eat another bite. 

They both sat for several minutes while Snape sipped his tea but didn’t even attempt to eat any food, his body in knots from the combination of everything weighing on hismind. Finally he stood. “Please excuse me, I have some pressing matters to take care of. Take your time finishing breakfast, let Tinny know if you need anything else.”

After pushing his chair in, Snape paused. “Oh, Soren should be resting, not playing around. Do not let him manipulate you. If at any point you catch him out of bed, I expect you to let me know.”

“Yes, of course,” Marie said, knowing full well there was no way she’d ever do that to Soren.

Snape gave a curt nod and disappeared into the dungeons, leaving Marie alone in the dining room, no one having eaten a proper meal. 

Over the next few hours, Snape tried to put the boy out of his mind, but he couldn’t.

He’d exchanged two letters with Harry over the last day and they were still not anywhere near to coming to a solution for the Ministry. Harry was doing what he could to delay the investigation, but it was inevitable, if he didn’t come up with something soon they’d be on his doorstep demanding answers and likely taking Soren away.

The only pitiful idea Snape had so far was to find out if he could take a paternity test while under the influence of Polyjuice potion. Obviously he couldn’t possibly show up to the Ministry (or have them come see him), looking like himself, but he had no idea if the polyjuice— which required biological material to transform him— would still result in a proper result if he were to give a sample under disguise. 

Harry obviously had no experience with this, but offered to bring a batch of the Ministry approved potion to test it out. 

The other option was a glamour, but Snape knew that any witch or wizard worth their salt would recognize a glamour immediately and he felt far less comfortable with that option. He didn’t think he could possibly get away, particularly as someone with a mysterious past, as trying to fool any of the Ministry officials who came for an investigation. 

Snape was starting to become hopeless, he’d sat at his desk in the dungeon for hours trying to come up with other possible solutions, but every hour that passed made him more despondent. He was beginning to consider that if he were to give Soren away, what he could do to make it less traumatic, even going as far as considering memory alteration or a potion that would make him slowly forget. But every time he tried to work through it, he drowned in self-loathing. None of these solutions avoided the obvious trauma that Soren would go through, and they were all far beyond his ethical boundaries

The last message he received was from Harry stated that he would bring him a test vial, and they could trial the paternity potion while Snape was on polyjuice, but they both knew the odds were against them. Snape also wondered how he would be able to go through such a charade with a 7 year-old who couldn’t possibly understand why his father was in a disguise when the officials showed up. He didn’t want to deceive the boy, not to mention anyone with a 7 year-old knew they couldn’t help but speak the truth. It was disastrous. 

After breakfast, Marie read for a bit in the parlor and sipped her tea before going upstairs to check on Soren. She opened his door quietly and peaked in, seeing Soren curled up in a ball facing the opposite wall, his eyes wide open.

“Soren, darling, how are you feeling? I’ve been so worried” She ran a hand through his jet black locks, gently. 

He rolled over and looked at her with sad eyes. “Not that good.”

His tray of breakfast sat untouched on his bedside table. 

“You didn’t eat any of your breakfast. Don’t you want to try a few bites?” Marie coaxed him gently. “You didn’t have dinner last night either, you need to have a little bit of something or you’re going to feel awful.”

Soren shook his head. “Don’t feel like it.”

“Soren, what’s going on?” Marie put a hand on his forehead and then ran her hand gently down the back of his head. “You need to eat. You can’t gain your strength back if you don’t. And you know your father doesn’t want you skipping any meals.”

“Not hungry.” Soren turned away.

“Does your stomach hurt?”

Soren nodded his head. “A little.” His voice broke and tears welled in his eyes. 

“Oh, sweetheart, is this about yesterday?”  

“Yeah,” he said as the dam broke and he started sobbing. 

Marie sat next to him and gathered him up in her arms. “Oh Soren. I saw your room yesterday, I’m sure that fire must have been really scary. But you have nothing to feel bad about. We fixed it, see? Everything is OK now, I promise, you’re safe, there is nothing to worry about.”

That just made Soren sob harder. “It’s all my fault,” he cried, his voice muffled in the folds of her clothes.

“It isn’t your fault.” She pulled his head up so she could look him in the eyes. “You’re only seven, you can’t possibly control your magic at this age. But we’re going to work on it, I promise. I know it is scary, but no one is angry with you. Accidental magic happens to nearly all witches and wizards when they are children. You have nothing to feel bad about.”

Soren wiped his face with the back of his hand. 

“Do you like your new room? Your father wanted you to have something you felt really happy and comfortable in. I helped a little bit. What do you think?”

If that was supposed to make him feel better, it only made Soren feel a million times worse. He had not only broken the rules and set his room on fire with a contraband wand, he’d lied about it, and instead of being in trouble, his father made him a beautiful new bedroom. He didn’t deserve it, and he couldn’t even bear to look at it. 

“It’s nice.” His voice was flat and devoid of any emotion. 

“I put a few touches on it. Don’t forget to look at the ceiling when you go to bed tonight.” Marie tried to cheer him up, but he wasn’t engaging. 

Soren attempted a smile, but the guilt was eating away at him and he was sure he’d be sick. “Thank you. I love it.”

Now Marie was really worried, Soren was obviously taking this very hard. He was usually so expressive, but he was barely responding, his affect was flat and it wasn’t normal. She knew she’d have to seek out to Lord Kent to encourage him to have another talk with the boy, there was something wrong, and it was clear she wasn’t able to provide the reassurance that he needed. 

“If you’d like, I can read to you for a bit. Maybe some Oliver Twist to take your mind off of everything?”

“OK,” Soren said, inching closer. It was certainly better than laying in bed alone, beating himself up. 

“On one condition. I want you to try to have a few bites of your breakfast.”

“I can’tttttt,” Soren whined, lifting his head up. “Please Ms. Cloutier, I don’t want to eat.”

“I know, but sometimes if you have a bite, you’ll get your appetite back. Just have a little something. Maybe some fruit? Or is there something else Tinny can make that you’d be able to eat?”

“I don’t know…maybe. Can Tinny make a pancake? One of those thin ones. With jam and sugar? My mummy used to make them for me… when I wasn’t feeling good.”

“I’m sure we can ask him.” Marie snapped her fingers “Tinny?”

The little house elf popped up. “Yes, miss?”

“Do you think you can take this tray back, and bring Soren a crêpe instead. With strawberry jam and a bit of powdered sugar? He isn’t feeling well.”

“Of course! I’s gonna be right back with that!” And with a poof, he disappeared. 

Marie went to the new little bookshelf and pulled out the big, leather bound copy of Oliver Twist. She’d spent a good two hours with it trying to fix the damage the other night, and while it wasn’t perfect, it was definitely much improved. Although she still doubted she’d be able to return it to the library without Lord Kent asking questions.

Soren cuddled into her as she opened the book. He was starting to feel a lot better. Knowing it was his father that made this new room for him made him feel guilty, but also loved, and he didn’t want to risk ruining things by telling him the truth. Slowly he was convincing himself that it was best just to move on and not think about it. And he promised himself he would never, ever do a dangerous spell like that again.

Mid-afternoon, Snape came upstairs to check on Soren. He peeked through the door and saw Marie, laying on the bed, reading to Soren who was cuddled into her. Not wanting to disturb them, he walked toward the classroom.

He always swore he never missed teaching, but there was something about being back in the classroom that gave him a sense of nostalgia. He also liked seeing the additions and small details Marie was constantly putting into the room, transforming it into way more than a classroom. Some of it he found rather silly, but he trusted that she knew what she was doing and sworn he’d stay out of it.

He knew there were plenty of things she did in the classroom that he wouldn’t approve of, per se, but if it was engaging for Soren, he was willing to turn a blind eye. 

There was a new set of cubbyholes lining the back wall where she had put some of their “educational supplies” (since he’d banned her from having ‘toys’)— including several new items for the play kitchen so she could teach math and units of measurement. He peeked into one cubby that had a series of bowls and measuring cups, and a jar full of miniature wooden spoons, spatulas, and scrapers. A cupcake tin…and A WAND? 

Snape reached into the cubby and pulled out a light-colored wand. His anger flared as he held it in his hand. After everything I’ve said. How many more ways can I be clear? It took every ounce of self-control he had not to go bursting into Soren’s room shouting with rage. He took several calming breaths and slipped the wand into his pocket before storming downstairs to wait in the parlor. He needed some time to figure out how he was going to handle this. 

Marie convinced Soren to come downstairs for afternoon tea, he was feeling much better after their talk and she wanted to encourage him to try and move on from the disaster and return to some normalcy. 

She came downstairs holding Soren by the hand, but the second she stepped into the parlor, she could feel that the energy was off. Lord Kent was sitting in his armchair, neither reading or sipping tea, just sitting. And he didn’t look pleased at all. 

“I see you’re feeling better,” he said to Soren. “Done with the theatrics for the day? Or do you plan to carry-on with them for the rest of the afternoon?”

Oh no, thought Marie. This was not good. That was definitely his angry tone, even if his voice was low and measured. 

“Yes, sir. I’m feeling better now. Ms. Cloutier talked to me and read to me and after I had some food I felt better.”

“Well, isn’t that convenient. How grand it must be to languish the day away in bed whilst your devoted entourage brings you food and reads to you.” His words were cutting and his tone ice cold. 

Soren was confused, he’d had his father scold him a hundred times, but he’d never heard him speak to him like this. He had no idea how he was supposed to react and he looked up at Marie with a hurt look on his face. 

Marie jumped in. “Lord Kent, Soren has been through a lot in the last day, he was properly traumatized from the fire. Providing him with a little extra space and comfort today so he can process his feelings isn’t something he should be shamed for.”

Snape knew he was being petty, but the minutes alone he’d spent thinking about how he was going to handle things had enraged him further rather than calming his nerves.

“Very well, then I expect everyone will resume their normal activities starting tomorrow.”

They all sat in awkward silence for a few more minutes while Tinny set down the tea service and poured the tea.

After a few sips of his tea, Snape clinked his cup down rather dramatically in the saucer, successfully drawing everyone’s attention. “I found something very interesting in the classroom today. Would you care to take a guess of what that might be, Ms. Cloutier?”

Well whatever it is, you’re not pleased about it. Marie could think of at least 20 things he would probably not be happy about finding in her classroom since she’d basically ignored his directive about not having any toys. Although for her, the baking set was vital to her teaching methods and she considered it an integral part of their math curriculum. Whatever it was, she’d listen to him get it off his chest and then move on while continuing to do things the way she wanted to. 

“I’m not quite sure, Lord Kent.”

Snape made a grand gesture of pulling the wand out of his coat. 

Marie just stared. That was not what she expected at all. She leaned forward to take a closer look and realized she didn’t recognize the wand at all. Like her own wand, it was pale in color, spruce, maybe? But she’d know her own wand anywhere, and it was safely tucked into her dress. So she sat back and waited. 

“I thought I made it extremely clear that you should never be without your wand. Not only does this mean you don’t have your wand on you, but you were so careless that you left this lying around in a classroom where a 7 year-old child could have easily found it. How could you be so irresponsible!!”  Snape was incandescent with rage now and he wasn’t able to contain himself. 

Marie was about to defend herself when she felt a small tug on her hand. A quick sideways glance toward Soren and his eyes were wide with fear. Then it clicked. Oh my God. Soren has a wand. The little boy pleaded with her with his eyes, his lips mouthing a silent “Please” and before she knew what she was doing, the words started tumbling out.

“I’m so sorry, Lord Kent. I honestly can’t believe I would do that. I was so distraught this morning, worrying about Soren, I went to tidy up in the classroom and I clearly forgot it. You are right to be angry, I feel terrible.”

Marie was trying her best to sound contrite, but she was still in a state of shock. 

“This is beyond acceptable, and an enormous breach of trust. Do you have any idea how dangerous this is? How can I possibly trust you to look after my son if you are not going to take the simplest of measures to keep him safe. The fact that this is the second time you’ve put him at risk is beyond forgivable.”

Soren shrank back into the couch, hoping it would swallow him whole. He felt terrible watching his father lambaste Ms. Cloutier when he knew it was his wand and his fault. But seeing just how angry the man was made it slightly easier to let her take the blame. Finally he spoke up. “Please don’t be angry with her father, Ms. Cloutier takes really good care of me.”

Snape clicked his fingers and pointed toward the stairs. “You stay out of this. Go to your room.”

Soren paused for a moment debating whether or not he should come clean. 

“Now,” he bellowed in a deep voice that sent Soren scurrying toward the stairs. 

Once the boy was out of sight, Snape narrowed his eyes at Marie.  “I cannot possibly keep you in this position in good faith.”

Marie was panicking. “Please, Lord Kent, I understand why you’re so angry, but please, I’m asking you to give me one more chance. You know how much I care for Soren, I would never purposely put him at risk. I can swear on my life I will never let anything like this happen again.”

Snape stood up and tossed the wand in her lap. “You’re right, it won’t happen again because you will not be here.”

Marie knew she should tell him the truth, but at this point she was worried he’d fire her anyway. She had to convince him somehow to give her one more chance. She picked up the wand and put it in her opposite sleeve.

“I understand Lord Kent, I do. Please believe me when I say that Soren means everything to me. I feel horrible. I was so worried about him this morning, I thought I heard him cry out and I must have set down my wand before I went to him. I’ve been so worried about him that my mind wasn’t where it usually is. Please, give me another chance, I’m begging you.”

Snape hated this, he didn’t want to fire Marie, but what else could he do. He knew it wasn’t intentional, but her recklessness put all of them in danger, most of all Soren. He reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose. 

Marie was in tears now, she should have just told the truth right away, but she couldn’t stand the thought of him punishing Soren so harshly. But losing her job would destroy her. Yes, she needed the money, but she also didn’t want to lose Soren like this. 

“I am so sorry, Lord Kent. Please believe me, I am filled with so much regret right now. Please don’t make me leave.”

Just then, Soren’s voice came from halfway up the stairs. “No! I don’t want Ms. Cloutier to leave! You can’t do that, father, it’s not fair!!” He ran down several more steps. “Let her stay! I need her!”

As quickly as a leopard pouncing on their prey, Snape got up, stalked over to the stairs and dragged Soren by the arm down the last few steps. Without a word, he walked him to the sofa and bent him over the arm while he rained down several hard smacks on his backside. “How dare you disobey me and speak to me that way! Not to mention eavesdropping on conversations not meant for you!” He gave him two more hard smacks before he pulled him up and released him. “Go to your room. I will deal you later. We are far from finished.”

Soren was really crying now. “No! It’s my fault!”

“Soren, please do as your father said, and go upstairs to your room. Now. Please.” Marie was trying to de-escalate the situation but it was about to blow up in her face. She was sure it would be worse for both of them if he confessed now, she was worried that would just send the man into full-blown apoplexy. 

Snape was in a full meltdown. He pointed at the stairs, a deep scowl on his face. “You have three seconds to get upstairs before I finish what I started. Go.”

Marie encouraged him further. “Please Soren. Listen to your father.”

Soren’s bum was throbbing and he had no doubt his father would make good on his threats, but he didn’t want to leave Ms. Cloutier in trouble, so he stood, frozen looking between them. 

When he didn’t move, Snape took him again by the arm, walked him roughly toward the stairs and gave him two more hard smacks, one right on top of the other. “You have one more second. Don’t test me.”

That was all he needed to decide, and Soren bolted up the stairs in tears, a combination of fear, guilt, and the searing heat in his backside.

Snape had lost control of his entire household and he paused where he stood to ground himself and take a breath. He walked over and stood over Marie. “I need some time to think. You will meet me in my study in one hour.”

Marie just nodded her head. “I understand. I really am so sorry. Please give me one more chance. You can dock my pay. Put me on probation. Whatever, please let me prove to you that I will not make this mistake again.”

“Not another word. We’ll discuss it in an hour,” he said as he retreated to his dungeons to be alone. 

Marie really had messed this one up. All she could do now was just hope and pray she could have one more chance. Even though she knew she hadn’t really left her wand, she knew it was her fault for letting it get to this point, she should have just told him the truth.

By now she knew that she’d violated his trust either way and she felt terrible. It was her first instinct to protect Soren, but this was a disaster. She paced back and forth in the parlor trying to figure out how she could possible fix things. You’re an idiot, Marie. You better do whatever it takes, you cannot afford to lose this job.

After a few more minutes of wracking her brain and pacing, she finally went up to check on Soren. 

Marie walked in to find him in his room, laying on his stomach, his face smooshed into his pillow. She walked over and sat on his bed, putting a gentle hand on his back. “Hey, can you talk to me for a minute.”

Soren shook his head and refused to look up. “It’s all my fault. Now he’s going to send you away.”

“He’s just upset right now because he thinks I put you in danger. Because he loves you and wants to protect you. Come on, sit up.”

Soren rolled over and pushed himself up so he was leaning back on his pillows, rabbit tightly in one hand, his face red and puffy from all of the tears.

Marie pulled out the wand. “I’m guessing this is yours? Can you tell me where you got it?”

“It’s my mummy’s. When she was sick she told me to keep it safe and not to let anyone take it.”

“I understand, it’s really special then, isn’t it.”

Soren nodded. 

“Did you try to use it even though you knew you weren’t allowed to ever touch a wand?”

“Yeah,” Soren said, tears streaming down his face. “I just wanted to practice so I could be good at magic.”

“Soren, do you know why your father made that rule? Wands are incredibly dangerous when you haven’t learned how to control your magic. This is why people don’t get wands until they are 11, and even then they are only meant to use them while supervised at school. It takes years to learn how to use a wand safely.”

“But I can do it.”

“What do you mean?” 

“My mummy taught me some spells, but some I learned on my own.”

“This wasn’t the first time you used the wand?”

“No…I’ve been practicing.”

Oh Merlin, this is bad. “OK, well, you know you can’t do it anymore. Not until you’re old enough, do you understand? Were you trying to cast a spell when the fire started?”

“Yes. I cast incindio, just like I saw you do. But it was too strong and fire went everywhere. I’m really sorry,” Soren was cracking and he started to cry, true remorse on his face. “It was really scary.”

Marie was usually pretty calm, but she couldn’t believe a boy his age was casting such dangerous spell. He had no idea just how badly he could have been injured, permanently and she was losing her temper. “Are you serious? You purposely cast an incindio and set your room on fire? That is really dangerous Soren! You could have been really really hurt. Magic is not something you can play with like that.” Marie was realizing she was completely out of her depth here, and was regretting that she didn’t let his father handle this. She shuddered to imagine how badly things could have ended. ”That’s really not OK, Soren.”

“I’m know, I’m sorry, I just wanted to see if I could do it. And I could.”

“Yeah, apparently. You nearly burned the house down.” Marie breathed a huge sigh. “Listen, what’s done is done, but I’m going to keep your wand. I promise I’ll keep it safe, but no more magic, OK? It is incredibly dangerous, as you now realize. I’m just glad you didn’t get hurt.” So much for a lecture. You’re rubbish at this, Marie. Lord Kent should be having this conversation with him.

“Are you going to tell my father?” Soren looked up at her with his big brown eyes. 

Yes. You absolutely should Marie, are you insane? “I don’t know. I really think I should, it isn’t fair to keep things from him. And you broke a really serious rule, Soren. That wasn’t a little bit of mischief, what you did was really dangerous.” She tried to channel Lord Kent, but she knew she had nothing to back it up.

“Please, Ms. Cloutier, please don’t tell him. He’ll be so mad at me. He’ll hate me. Please!!!” Soren was full-on begging, tugging at her arm. “I learned my lesson, I promise. I’ll never do magic ever again until I’m older.”

“I can’t promise you. I don’t even know what’s going to happen with me right now, but I can promise he won’t kill you or hate you. He certainly isn’t going to be happy about it, but he’ll forgive you, I promise.”

“No, don’t!! What if he doesn’t want me here anymore?” Soren cried into his rabbit. “He’ll send me away.”

“Oh Soren, that’s not going to happen. You’re a child, he might get upset and he’ll probably punish you, but I promise you, he’s not ever going to get rid of you. Come here.” Marie gave him a big hug and tried to settle him. 

“I don’t want you to leave,” Soren said, crying into her. If you leave, I’m going with you.” He hugged her really tightly. ”I’m really sorry. I wasn’t trying to be bad, I promise I won’t do anything like that ever again, please don’t tell him.”

Marie hugged him back and gave him a kiss on top of the head. “I know, and I’m not planning on going anywhere. I’ll do whatever I can to stay” Marie hoped that was the case. She wasn’t sure how to get herself out of this mess now without ruining the trust she had with both Soren and Lord Kent. She was so screwed. 

When the hour was up, Marie knocked on the study door, her heart pounding in her chest and her mouth completely dry. 

“Enter,” came the deep voice from behind the door. 

You’ve got this Marie. She took one more deep breath and reached for the doorknob.

Like Soren, she wasn’t sure what she expected, but Lord Kent’s study was almost cozy if not for the intimidating man sitting behind the large desk waiting to rip her to shreds. She felt like a naughty schoolgirl who’d been called into the Headmaster’s office, unsure of her fate and whether she was about to be expelled. In another context, the thought might have been enticing, maybe even sexy, but this was anything but. She felt pure dread, and this wasn’t some fantasy role play, this was her real life, and she was terrified she was about to lose her job. A job she desperately needed.

“Have a seat, Ms. Cloutier.” Snape motioned to one of the smaller chairs in front of his desk and she sat down immediately. 

Right away Marie noticed that his voice was calmer and the tension from earlier was gone from his face. Oh, he wasn’t pleased, but he was no longer on the precipice of spontaneous combustion. 

“What do you have to say for yourself?” He asked calmly, his hands folded on the desk in front of him. “This is your opportunity to speak, uninterrupted. I will listen carefully, but I suggest you choose your words wisely.”

Great. No pressure. Marie’s mind was a jumble of different thoughts and she was panicking. Should she tell him the whole truth now? Double down on her cover-up and beg for mercy? Tell him the truth, now is the time. She knew she probably should, but she worried it was already too late.

“Lord Kent, I will be honest, when I took this job it was because I really needed the money. I wasn’t thrilled to come here, honestly I was afraid we would never see eye-to-eye, but your offer was too good to refuse. And I’m glad I said yes. Over the last few weeks I’ve grown to really care for Soren. Truly. He’s not just the little boy I’m teaching, I really love him. I want the best for him. I would do anything in the world to make sure he is happy, healthy, and safe. I’ve also come to really appreciate your commitment to him and his education, and I’ve enjoyed being here at the Manor. With both of you. It would really break my heart to leave.”

Great, so far, all true. She took a deep breath before she continued. Do it Marie, tell him the truth. “I went to see Soren before I came here… “Come on, Marie, just say it. “And…I…”

Her voice caught and she felt tears burning in her eyes and she had to swallow down a lump before she continued. “I looked at his innocent little face and I hated myself for not doing more to protect him. I was careless, and I put a boy’s life in danger because I was distracted and forgetful, and I am honestly so angry with myself. All I want to do is protect him and care for him, and yet, I’m the one who has put him in danger. Even though it was an accident, you’re right, it is unforgivable. I don’t even know how I can forgive myself. All I can offer is words of deep regret, and a solemn vow that I will do whatever I can to rebuild your trust and make sure this never happens again. However, if that is not an option, I understand completely and I am ready to offer my resignation. I love Soren so much, and I want what is best for him, and if you do not believe that is me, I will accept that.”

What the actual fuck, Marie. She hoped she hadn’t overdone it, most of that was true, but she was also hoping that by throwing herself on her sword, she might have some tiny little glimmer of hope to save her job. At this point she knew Lord Kent wasn’t one for begging, so instead she decided to take responsibility and show “true” remorse.

Seconds ticked by in silence, Marie reeling with nausea from all of the lies and the uncertainty and anticipation of what he would say.

“Thank you for taking responsibility. I am glad I do not need to waste my breath explaining to you how dangerous it is, both to be without a wand, and to leave your wand lying about with a 7 year-old child in the manor. I will be honest, had this been anyone else, they would have been immediately out the door. However, I can see how much you care for the boy, and how much he cares for you. He has had enough disruption in his life over the last few weeks, that— aside from his safety, of course—his stability and mental well-being are my biggest priorities. For this reason, I have decided to allow you to stay.”

Marie wanted to throw herself at his feet in gratitude. “Thank you, Lord Kent.” A few small tears flowed out of her eyes in relief. “Thank you so much. I promise it won’t happen again.”

“However,” Snape said, drawing out the word for effect, “we are going to do things a bit differently until you can prove to me I can trust you again.” As he spoke, he pulled out one of the handkerchiefs from his coat, stood, and walked around to the front of his desk so he could hand it to her properly. 

“Of course, Lord Kent. I want to prove myself to you. Anything.” Once again she was struck by how tall and imposing he felt, particularly when she was seated. 

Snape put his hands behind his back and stared down at her. “First, I want you to do a mental exercise on personal accountability, and what it means to be accountable for your own actions and taking care of yourself. Then I want you to think about what it means to be responsible for the life of another person. In this case, a vulnerable child who is depending on you. What are the ways you hold yourself accountable to both? I want you to really think about your personal weaknesses and what you need to work on so that this doesn’t happen again. Then you will submit to me a self-improvement plan.”

What the actual fuck. “I’m sorry, what?” Marie didn’t mean for that to come out so rudely, but she wasn’t always great at hiding her feelings.

“A self-improvement plan,” he said, speaking slowly and enunciating each word slowly.

“I heard the words, but I’m not sure what that is.”

“Very well, then I shall spell it out for you. You will spend some time today in quiet reflection- in your room, in the classroom, outside, wherever you like, and you will think about the things you believe could use some work. You will write them down, and then you will make a plan on how you will do these things better, and how you plan to hold yourself to account. Fairly straightforward, I believe.”

“OK…” Marie still wasn’t entirely sure she understood. 

“Let’s say that a person struggles with being on-time. They are chronically late each morning to work and they would like to improve that. First, it is important to understand why they are late. Are they not getting enough sleep and they can’t wake up? Perhaps they should go to bed earlier. Do they take more time to get ready than they think? They should get up earlier. Are they constantly running around in the morning looking for things? They should prepare everything they need the night before. Are they constantly forgetting things and having to come back for them? Then perhaps they’d benefit from a checklist they use every day before they walk out the door. Hopefully by addressing the problem at its root, one can solve it. Permanently.”

“Oh, I see,” Marie said. “Got it. So, for me that would be why I keep forgetting my wand?”

“This is your improvement plan, Ms. Cloutier. You should determine what areas you would like to improve, I cannot do that for you. However, I would suggest, somewhere in your plan, you address whatever issues have resulted in you making this mistake, not once, but twice after vowing to me that it would never happen again. Whether that is a result of distraction, forgetfulness, disorganization in other parts of your life, lack of sleep, I do not know. This will require you to take a hard look at yourself, but it is my hope that in doing so, we will solve this at its source and it will not be a problem ever again.”

“Yes, sir. Absolutely.” To be honest, it wasn’t a terrible idea. A little infantilizing perhaps, but not outside of the realm of professionalism. She’d seen this kind of approach used in her graduate program to help struggling students. It felt a bit like overkill, since she was essentially trying to solve a problem she didn’t really have, but whatever, if this is what the man wanted to let her keep her job, she’d make the best self-improvement plan he’d ever seen. 

She waited a few seconds before asking, “So, that’s it?”

“Why? Is there something else you would like to propose?”

“No, sir,” Marie was feeling awkward now, like it almost felt like she was getting off too easy. She’d expected more, scolding? Threats, maybe. “So just the self-improvement plan.”

“Yes, Ms. Cloutier. Just the self-improvement plan. But do not take this lightly— I want your word that you will commit to it fully. This is your chance to prove to me you are capable of doing better. I have no doubt that you mean well, but I need to see that translated into actions and real change. Neither of us can afford to see you make another mistake like this again.”

“Of course. Thank you for giving me another chance.”

“I am doing this because I believe in your ability to do better and I do not want Soren to lose another person whom he cares about. But understand this clearly…you will not have another opportunity like this again, so take this seriously.” He glared down at her, his words firm and sharp.

“I will.” Marie just stared at him still feeling like she was missing something. “Is there something else you want me to say?”

Snape raised an eyebrow. “I believe you’ve said everything. You’ve apologized, expressed true remorse, and will be coming up with a plan for how to do better. That is sufficient.”

“Are you going to give me feedback on my plan? Like, if I’m missing something or you think there’s a better way to do it? I don’t really have a lot of experience with this, I want to make sure I do it right.”

“I can. It is completely up to you. If you wish for my feedback, I will give it to you. If you’d like my help in holding you accountable to the details of your plan, I can also do that. This is your self-improvement plan, you will need to think about what works for you. For some people, they do best holding themselves accountable, for others, it helps to have someone else share in the responsibility.”

“What do you mean?”

“Let’s say you are trying to stop a bad habit. Cursing. You could fine yourself a galleon every time you use a bad word. You stick it in your little swear jar, you donate it to charity at the end of the month, and that might be enough for you. For other people, they may not even hear themselves, they might need help from someone else to notice when they say a bad word or  to keep track of their jar.”

“Oh, OK. I get it.” Seems reasonable enough, she’d definitely seen people do that before.

“Everyone is motivated differently. For example, if you were trying to improve your health, you might have someone ask you each day if you have done your exercise for the day. Or you might keep a food journal that you share with your partner or a friend who is doing it with you. Just having another person ask might be the difference between doing it and not doing it. For other people, the fear or shame of another person asking them about what they are eating or doing might be so off-putting that it has the reverse effect. Instead they would rather motivate themselves by perhaps giving themselves a reward if their goals are met each week.”

“A reward, really?” Marie stifled a small smile. “I thought you didn’t believe in positive reinforcement.”

Snape gave her a signature eyebrow raise. “The science is quite clear on this, Ms. Cloutier. The fear of negative consequences is a far more powerful motivator than the promise of a reward. You may disagree with me, but it is just how the human brain is wired. However, in certain circumstances, and for certain people, it may be effective to use both.”

“Right. So you’re saying if I want to, I can ask you to help or check-in or whatever?”

“Yes. If you would like someone to be accountable to, I will do that. If you do not, that is up to you.” He knew this would never work if he forced it. He wanted her to come to the conclusion that she needed his help, his guidance. As much as he was tempted to, he was trying not to cross any professional boundaries, although if he had it his way, this conversation would be going in quite a different direction. Ultimately his intentions were pure, he wanted her to stay, but she needed to shape up, she was in desperate need of self-discipline.

“OK, so, when it comes to my wand, then, how would you help me?”

“It depends. It can be as simple as me asking you at each meal. Or it could be a journal you keep track of, perhaps you check off that you have your wand at various points of the day, and then you bring me your journal at the end of the day.”

Marie didn’t know why, but the whole idea of him checking up on her was causing her to feel flushed. “I mean, I could just always check yes. You wouldn’t know.” Why the fuck would you say that Marie, are you trying to egg him on?

“You could, but that would defeat the purpose, wouldn’t it? If you don’t trust yourself enough to be honest with your own self-improvement plan, I can do random checks throughout the day and it will remove that dilemma. And I will keep hold of the journal.”

Well this is getting interesting. “What happens if I forget, you fire me?”

“No, Ms. Cloutier, the point of this entire exercise is to give you a chance to improve your habits. As long as you are sticking to your plan and taking the steps to do better, I will not fire you. But if the system you are using to help you improve is not working, I might suggest more rigorous methods, or a complete change in the approach.”

“Oh.” 

“So instead of checking in at meal-times, you check in more often. If that doesn’t work, perhaps we put a charm on your wand so that if you are ever more than a foot away from it, it alerts you. Or me. And then we add consequences.”

Consequences? For real? This is getting interesting. “What, like the swear jar.”

“Yes, a similar idea. Although it doesn’t have to be money. It could be anything. Whatever you choose. For some people, money isn’t an effective consequence, they have no problem tossing a galleon in a jar 10 times a day without a second thought. It might mean your time. Or taking something away. Or having to do something you don’t want to do. I think you get the idea.”

“So basically, a punishment.”

“A consequence, Ms. Cloutier. You’re an adult, you choose to be held accountable to yourself and you choose the consequences that work for you. A punishment suggests you have no agency, which is the opposite of what we’re doing here.”

Same thing, different words. “Have you ever done this before?” Marie was getting really curious now. She was getting the feeling this wasn’t the first time he’d put someone on this kind of plan. It was way too well thought-through to be something he’d come up with off the cuff. She was dying to know more without seeming too eager.

“What? Helped someone with a self-improvement plan?” He asked, casually. “Of course. More times than I can possibly count.” 

“Really?”

“Yes, Ms. Cloutier. I can be very effective in helping people reach their goals when they’re honest about what they need to do better. My results are impeccable.”

Snape’s “behavior modification plan” was something he’d come up with in his first year of teaching, and it quickly became a regular part of his disciplinary arsenal as Head of Slytherin, particularly when a student needed more than a quick reminder to get back on track. A month or, Merlin-forbid a term on one of his plans had never failed to get results. Although, when it came to his students, they had absolutely no input, he set all the terms and conditions himself and they were nothing less than Draconian. It was every Slytherin’s worst nightmare and he made effective use of it as a threat. 

Marie felt a flush go up her neck. “Oh. Well, what if I don’t really know what works for me?”

“Then I’m sure we’ll figure it out. Trial and error, Ms. Cloutier, no one needs to get it perfectly on the first try. Just take your time today, think about all of the things you would like to do better. Bad habits you’d like to change. Goals you would like to reach. Imagine the ideal version of yourself….and then what you think you need to be able to make these changes. If promising yourself a shopping trip at the end of the week is your biggest motivator, by all means, include that in your plan. But if you think you’d benefit from having an ‘accountability advisor,’ I will do whatever you require to help you succeed. The terms are up to you, you just need to ask.”

“Don’t you mean accountability partner?” Marie asked, her mouth curling up slightly. 

“That would suggest we are equals, Ms. Cloutier. In this scenario, we would not be. You will report to me, I will ensure you are meeting your goals, and if required, I will ensure that your consequences are enforced.”

Woah. Marie’s mind was now swirling. What the fuck is this? Why is this kind of hot? She searched his face but he was dead serious, there wasn’t a hint at all that he was teasing about any of it or that this was a joke. “So, if I asked you to make me run around the maze everytime I forgot to brush my teeth, you’d seriously make me do that?”

“Yes. Without hesitation.”

“Oh, well, that’s not really an issue, I was just curious.” 

“You may write whatever you want in your plan. After dinner, we will return to the study and go through it. If you would like my feedback, you may ask for it. If not, I will trust that you know what you need to do and accept it as is. My degree of involvement is up to you.”

“So just so I understand, as long as I’m working on my self-improvement plan, you won’t fire me for any mistakes I make?” This was the important part, she needed to keep her job, so she needed to know exactly what the terms were here.

“Correct. Consider this your probation period. As long as you are clearly committed to making changes, and you are actively working within your plan, your only consequences are those you choose for yourself. However, if at any point I feel you are not taking the plan seriously or not making an effort to do better, or not being honest about what you say you are doing, I will terminate our contract.”

“Oh.”

“Progress, not perfection, Ms. Cloutier. If something isn’t working, I expect you to come to me so we can change our approach. If you do not, that’s when we will have an issue. Do you understand?”

“Yes, sir. I do.” Marie knew she’d been flippant about some of this, but it was clear that Lord Kent was taking this very seriously and he wasn’t playing around. As silly as she might find the whole idea of it, this was her only chance to fix things.

“Very well. Then take your time. We will go over it tonight after Soren goes to bed. The most difficult part of this is being honest with yourself about what you want to change. And in some cases, asking for the help you may require. This plan can be as simple or involved as you would like it to be. I leave it up to you.”

Marie nodded. “Thank you.” Her mind was reeling and she had no idea what she was going to do.

“You’re dismissed, please send Soren in to see me.” Snape returned behind his desk and took a seat in his executive chair, pulling open his top drawer. 

Marie stood up from her chair and leaned forward over the desk. “Please, Lord Kent, you’re not going to punish him again are you?”

Snape pulled out a piece of parchment, slapped it dramatically on his desk and closed his drawer firmly, clearly indicating his irritation. “How many times, Ms. Cloutier do I need to remind you that you are not to interfere in how I discipline my son. Perhaps you might consider adding that to your self-improvement plan. Do not overstep your role.”

“Sorry,” Marie said. “I’m just really worried about him. He needs your reassurance right now. He’s been an emotional wreck all day worrying that if he makes you angry, you’ll send him away.”

Snape ignored that last bit, a pang of guilt ripping through his chest. “Soren knows the rules and he is also very aware of the consequences when he breaks them. I know you care for him, but please, respect my role as his father.” Snape was asking politely, but his tone and the look he was giving made it clear it was not a request and she’d better heed him.

“Yes, I know, I’m sorry.” 

Snape picked up his quill and began scrawling quickly across the parchment, his brow furrowed in concentration, waving her away with his left hand without looking up again. “You may go.”

As soon as she closed the door and stepped into the hallway, Marie exhaled, letting out a deep breath, not realizing she had been holding it in for the entirety of their conversation. The muscles of her jaw and neck were tight from clenching her teeth and she had to take a moment to shake it all out.

Chapter Text

When Soren entered into his father’s study, he was a quivering mess. He felt guilty and sad and had spent the last hour worrying to death about what his father would do when he found out the truth about the wand. He had a constant lingering sickness in his stomach that he couldn’t get rid of, but he was too afraid at what his father might do if he found out, so he resolved to never tell.  

“Soren, come here.” Snape stood from behind his desk and motioned with two fingers. “Sit”

Soren sat in the same chair Marie had just been in, but his feet dangled. His father seemed scarier standing behind the big desk and he didn’t like the feeling one bit. 

“Do you know why you are here?”

“Yes, sir.” Soren whispered, doing his best to keep tears from falling. 

“Why?”

“Cuz you told me to go upstairs and I didn’t.” He hoped that was it, he was pretty sure Marie hadn’t told him about the wand or she would have mentioned it. And his father didn’t seem nearly angry enough for that to be it. 

“Were you listening to the conversation I was having with Ms. Cloutier?”

“Yes…but I was scared. I didn’t want you to be mad at her!” Soren was getting worked up and the tears started streaming. 

“Mind your tone,” Snape gave him a pointed look before continuing. “None of that was any of your business. When I ask you to do something, you do it. You deliberately disobeyed me. Not to mention, I warned you before what the consequences would be for listening in on conversations not meant for you.”

“But you already punished me,” Soren cried, feeling indignant. 

Snape scoffed slightly to himself. “That was a warning, not a proper punishment.”

“It still really hurt,” Soren whined slightly. The sting had long faded, but he’d definitely felt those whacks for a good fifteen minutes. It seemed like a real punishment to him.

“Yes, that was rather the point. You didn’t listen to me when I used my words, so I found another way to get your attention. Up until now, I have been extremely lenient with you. But let me be clear. If you disobey me, defy me, deliberately break a rule again, you are not going to get away with a handful of smacks like you got today. Do you understand?”

“Yes sir.” Soren wiped at his face. “I just don’t want Ms. Cloutier to leave.” He started to heave into real sobs. “Please don’t make her leave, father…I need her!” 

Snape reached across his desk and deposited a handkerchief in front of the boy. “I realize that. And that is precisely why she’s not going anywhere. But it is not your job to defend her. Ms. Cloutier is an adult, she is perfectly capable of having a conversation with me without you poking your nose where it doesn’t belong. I swear, the both of you are like two peas in a conspiratorial meddling little pod.”

“Ms. Cloutier is staying?” Soren looked up from his handkerchief. “Really?”

“Yes.”

“Thank you father!” Soren jumped up to hug him, but the instant he was out of his chair, he was met with a sharp snap of his father’s fingers pointing for him to sit back down.

“Now then, I am more than ready to be finished with all of this. We all have important things to do, and I refuse to put up with a single minute more of nonsense today. From anyone. So you will go to bed early tonight, and you will wake up tomorrow a polite and obedient little boy, and barring a coma or death, you will be at breakfast on time, you will go to class, and I had better not hear a single word of defiance out of your mouth for the foreseeable future. Do you understand?”

“Yes, father.”

“Good.”  Snape stood from his chair and walked over to Soren. “Is there anything else you would like to say?”

“I’m sorry I didn’t listen and go upstairs when you said and I promise I won’t do it again.” Soren was pretty sure that’s what he wanted to hear, he was starting to better understand how his father worked now.

Snape was exhausted. He’d never admit it, but after he’d cooled down a bit he realized he had perhaps been a bit harsh earlier. He should have never had any of that conversation with Soren in the room, so he took partial responsibility for the boy’s emotional outburst. Nonetheless, he didn’t want Soren thinking he could go around disobeying him, so while he didn’t regret smacking him, per se, he had no intention of punishing him further. He was drained. 

“Very well, then we will put the events of earlier behind us. However, you will stay in your room until dinner and reflect on your dreadful behavior and how you might make better decisions next time. And if I hear a single peep or I catch you playing around instead of being contrite, quiet and reflective, we’ll be right back here for a much less pleasant discussion, am I clear?

“Yes, father,” Soren said, looking up innocently from the top of his eyes, relief flowing through him that he wasn’t in worse trouble. 

Snape took the boy by the wrist and gently guided him out of the chair before propelling him in the direction of the door with a firm hand between the shoulders. “Off you go.”

Before he reached the middle of the room, Soren turned around and wrapped himself around his father’s waist. “Thank you for letting Ms. Cloutier stay. And for my new room, I really really love it.”

Not knowing what else to do, Snape patted the boy twice on the head. “Good. Now get out of here before I change my mind and decide you could do with a few good smacks with my ruler.” He clicked his fingers and Soren bolted for the door.

For the rest of the afternoon Marie sat in the library, staring at a blank piece of parchment. Whatever she’d expected from her meeting with Lord Kent, that conversation was not it. She’d braced herself to get fired, to plead and beg, to listen to him shout and berate her. But a “self-improvement plan”—she still couldn’t quite wrap her head around it. 

At first she thought it was some silly little thing he was doing to make her feel like an errant child, but as the conversation evolved, it became obvious that he was very serious about this, and it was the only way she was going to keep her job. And all-in-all, it wasn’t the worst thing in the world. She had often tried to put herself on some half-assed version of that every few months. She’d go through periods where she felt super motivated to try to do everything perfectly, like get in shape, or study for exams, or learn to paint, but inevitably she’d kind of burn-out a few days or weeks later and then have to wait for for another panic to set in before would feel that surge of energy again. 

Looking back, she’d always kind of struggled to stay consistent with things. She was super bright, and honestly, she got by with a lot at school because of her intelligence. She’d study, but she’d often wait until the last minute and pull all-nighters for a week until she was literally collapsing on the last day of finals. She’d swear to herself she would be more organized next term, but inevitably she fell into the same pattern again.  And it was true, she never really had anyone holding her accountable because at the end of the day, she’d topped nearly every class, and no one really felt the need to intervene. Certainly not her parents who were kind of hands-off, not wanting to put any pressure on her. But it was exhausting.  

Even in grad school, she never really learned good habits, she just kind of knew how much she had to do to get the results she wanted. Sometimes she hated herself for it- she wished she had a bit more self-discipline. But at the same time, her system, as flawed as it was, worked. It just meant her life was a constant cycle of one extreme or the other and sometimes it had to get really stressful before she could manage to get herself back on track. She thrived on the anxiety and chaos, even though it made her feel like trash, destroyed her sleep, and ultimately really did a number on her self-care. The resulting crash would mean she’d lock herself away for several days or weeks at a time and read, draw, or just kind of avoid the world while she recuperated. 

Now that she really thought about it, she knew this tendency to get overwhelmed was how she ended up in the financial situation she was currently in. She hadn’t given any details to Lord Kent, of course, but she was in pretty dire straits when she took the job. Obviously. Yes, she had goals of starting her own school, but she also had run up a good amount of debt that just seemed to keep getting worse. Not on purpose, she wasn’t a compulsive spender or anything, she just kind of, sucked at managing her own money. And sometimes she dealt with things by just…ignoring them. Which she knew she shouldn’t, but sometimes it was just too overwhelming and she didn’t have anyone she could really go to for help. Her parents were clueless, her friends were all successful and would be shocked to find out the truth. She was alone…with all of it. 

Coming out of Beauxbatons, she’d wanted to do both Muggle and Wizard post-secondary education. But, getting grants as a foreign student (she held Canadian citizenship) was really hard. She’d ended up taking a loan from the goblins to cash her out in dollars to study in the US, but the rates were insane. She’d done most of her wizarding education in Europe, so she didn’t have too much debt from that, but now she owed quite a bit to the goblins, and her parent’s livelihood and retirement was now at risk. If she didn’t start paying things back soon, they’d take her parent’s house and they’d lose access to the small bit of money they’d saved up in their vault for their later years. 

If she could go back in time, she might have made a different choice. At 19 she thought she’d become a professor at an elite institution and then the money would just flow, so the loans had been meaningless. She thought that maybe she’d write some books, do some speaking, but then her plans changed, and she realized that her real passion was building her own school. She envisioned a curriculum that taught wizarding children with the same pedagogy as the best of muggle education, except, you know, with magic. She was confident there would be a space for it, but founding a new school, especially one on more modern ideas about education was going to be tough, and she was going to need a lot of money to get started. Not just to pay off her debts, but to get enough capital to get off the ground. But now she was in so far over her head that she wasn’t even sure if she’d even be able to save her parents from financial ruin, much less build her dream school. 

Anyway— she tried to stop her thoughts from wandering, she needed to focus and get something down on paper. She couldn’t possibly show up tonight with a blank piece of parchment, Lord Kent would be wholly unimpressed, livid even. He was giving her another chance and his one request was that she committed to a plan. Whatever that was, she had to try. 

She started with a list:

1. Always have my wand 

OK, this one was bullshit, but she knew he’d expect to see it there so she put it on the list. 

2. Do not question Lord Kent on his parenting methods 

Another stupid one, but OK, she would try to do better. Although she wasn’t going to stop trying to convince him to try other things, she’d just be more careful about it. He didn’t respond very well to her outright objections, so she would have to work on this slowly

3. ….

She sat there staring at the page. What did she want to do better? Really. Not just what he wanted to hear, but there had to be things she could do better. Come on, Marie.

If she really thought about it, there were loads of things she could improve on…the question was, did she want to? 

She’d managed to get this far on her own, did she really need an “improvement plan” to make these changes? If she wanted to change, she’d do it on her own, right?  You know your life is a train-wreck Marie, why not give it a try? 

Why not? Because the idea was terrifying. To put all of her flaws out there and then be put into a situation where she pretty much had to be accountable to them. She wasn’t sure she was ready to make those kinds of changes. Like an addict who knew the drugs were ruining their life, but they weren’t ready to give them up. Except for her, she was addicted to the adrenaline of the chaos. But if not now, then when? Don’t you want to be free from this debt? Build your school? You can’t do this and keep going the way you’ve been going.

“Ughhhhh,” she let out a loud sigh. Maybe she should get some fresh air. No, she just needed to focus. Sit here and write out the plan. Go all in. And the fact remained, she kind of wanted to hand over some control to someone else. It would be a relief, even if she didn’t fully understand why she craved it. Go for it, Marie. Lord Kent had promised that he “always gets results.” 

She let her mind wander, wondering who he’d done this for in the past. She knew next to nothing about his life prior to her arrival and he never offered it, but she was definitely intrigued. He was rich, so he didn’t work, did he? Maybe he used to, and in that job he managed other people. Or maybe he’d done it as part of a relationship. That was a much more intriguing thought. She tried to imagine what he’d be like as a boyfriend or a husband. Even if he had a frosty exterior, something about his domineering nature made the idea of him behind closed doors particularly sexy.  Focus, Marie, for Merlin’s sake.

She tapped her quill for a few more minutes before she finally started writing, deciding she was going to throw caution to the wind and go all-in. If nothing else, it would be a new adventure, what was the worst that could happen?

       3. Get more sleep. Go to bed on time and get up so I don’t feel like shit every day and need several cups of coffee to function. Also maybe less coffee in the afternoon. Do not stay up all night reading.

That was pretty straightforward. Her sleep schedule was abysmal. How she managed to function, continually, on only a few hours of sleep was beyond her (OK, maybe it was caffeine and adrenaline), but every time she promised herself she’d go to bed early the next night, she’d be tired all day and then the evening would roll around and bam, she’d be reading until 2am. 

4. Self-care: Start the day with a walk outside or yoga.  Always do my skincare routine, brush my teeth morning and night. Leave room for hobbies like reading, drawing, making art. 

This seemed easy enough, but she always seemed to forget to do the simple things because she’d stay up late instead of going to bed at a reasonable time and despite what she’d said to him, she didn’t always remember to brush her teeth. Her self-care could use a lot of work. She could mask a lot of it with some quick charms, but she knew she needed some encouragement here. There just didn’t seem to be enough time or energy, so self-care was always the first thing to go out the window.

5. Finances: Do not spend money on useless things. Figure out how much I really need to pay everything back and start my school. 

OK, even if Lord Kent was going to give her the money for the dumb stuff, and pay her really well, she still really needed to figure out how she was going to get on some kind of payment plan with the goblins before her parents ended up penniless and homeless. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to tell Lord Kent about all of that, he would no doubt think she was a moron for ignoring her finances the way she has. She’d come back to that. 

6. Be a better role model for Soren, learn to control my emotions and my mouth in front of him. Be more thoughtful about my words. 

For the most part, she felt OK about this, but she definitely had a tendency to lose control of her emotions and was quick to argue with Lord Kent, which she knew pushed him to the edge. She didn’t want him to merely tolerate her because she needed this job, she wanted him to respect her and be proud of her. She didn’t know why, but she was desperate for his approval and she knew she had to do better before she was going to get it. 

7. Be a better friend- and daughter. Reach out more, write more letters, go visit. Stay present. 

She felt bad about how she just kind of disappeared sometimes, went off the grid when her life got complicated and things got overwhelming. She knew this was hard on her parents, especially, but also on her friends. She often felt bad about it, but still couldn’t motivate herself to write or show up for a visit, even for the people who had really been there for her. It was something she truly disliked about herself and she wanted to do better.

8. Honesty. Be more honest. 

The last one was too much. She knew this was an issue (and the guilt was currently eating away at her), but she wasn’t sure how to include this in her plan without being a complete hypocrite. She knew she needed to come clean with the whole wand situation, but it was definitely too late now. That ship had sailed. 

Maybe it could just be like, be more honest moving forward? It wasn’t that she really lied that often. But she wasn’t always fully honest with people. She felt guilty that her parents had no idea just how bad things were with the goblin loans. And she often hid her true feelings from her friends so she could keep her bubbly fun outgoing nature. And she’d certainly buggered things up with Lord Kent.  

The more she thought about it, the more she realized that she had created a safe, but inauthentic world for herself where she didn’t have to deal with some of the things that were slowly destroying the real world around her. She craved escape, perhaps part of the reason she’d so readily agreed to move into this manor house with a random wizard and his illegitimate child. She’d have done almost anything to avoid her own reality when she saw the ad posted. 

After sitting with it for several minutes, she put a line through the last one. She definitely wasn’t ready to address all that. No, there were enough things on her list, she was sure Lord Kent would be satisfied.  And now that she thought about it, maybe she should get rid of some of the financial stuff as well, perhaps just make a savings plan for her school. She fixed the parchment and rewrote that section. 

The hours had flown by as she dove into her subconscious, trying to figure out what she wanted to change and who she wanted to be. But this was just the first step— after that she needed to decide what her goals were, and how she planned to achieve them. And that was going to be the tricky part. Maybe she could just start there and see what Lord Kent had to say. 

She didn’t want to look too desperate, but she wanted his help. She wanted him to tell her what to do, to hold her to his ridiculous standards, she felt like that was what she needed right now to get her out of this rut. 

Her stomach growled and she looked at her watch, realizing it was almost time for dinner already. She’d only just begun to scratch the surface, but hopefully this would suffice for now. 

When she came into the parlor, Lord Kent was sitting in his armchair, reading. 

“Where’s Soren?” 

“In his room. Reflecting. I’ll have Tinny fetch him now.” Snape snapped his fingers and called for Tinny. He set down his book and turned slightly in her direction.  “How is your plan coming along?”

Awkward. Painful. I’m not sure I really want to do this, except I know I do. “Well, I took your advice and I’m trying to be really honest with myself, but it’s actually harder than I thought.”

“I’m quite proud of you Ms. Cloutier. It would have been much easier not to, but that shows me you are taking this seriously.” 

Marie felt a surge of euphoria flood through her body at his words. Why did she want to please him so badly? Why did the slightest hint of praise feel like a drug? She steadied herself before she answered. “Thanks.” We’ll see what you have to say when you see my not even half-done plan.

When Soren saw Marie, he ran down the rest of the stairs, skipping several as he went, and jumping down the last three before launching himself onto her, practically knocking the wind out of her as he leaped into her lap. “I’m so glad you’re staying! I don’t want you to ever leave me, never ever ever!!” He wrapped his arms all the way around her neck, nearly choking the life out of her. 

Snape clicked his fingers loudly. “Soren, get off of Ms. Cloutier this instant. And don’t you dare run down the stairs like that again. Nor do you jump on top of people like that, have you lost your mind? Come here.”

“Sorry, Ms. Cloutier,” Soren said as he climbed off of her lap, slowly making his way to his father’s armchair. 

“It’s OK, darling, I’m so happy I get to stay with you too.” She kissed him on the forehead before he scrambled away.

When he was within arms reach, Snape snatched his wrist and pulled him closer, growling at him in a low tone. “What did I tell you? Absolutely no more nonsense today. Do you really expect me to believe you’ve been in your room reflecting on your deplorable behavior when you come dashing down the stairs like a raving lunatic? Unacceptable.” 

Soren looked suitably chastised. “I’m sorry, father, I was just really happy to see her.”

“I should have given you the hiding you deserved earlier. I can guarantee you would not have come bounding into the parlor like a wild heathen if you’d been properly punished. A mistake I will not make again. Now go sit down, and do not ever let me see you do that again.” Snape sounded exasperated and shook his head slowly back and forth, clearly at his wits end. “Absolutely disgraceful.”

Soren didn’t need to be told twice, he escaped as soon as his father released him, taking refuge by Marie, who put a comforting arm around his shoulder. 

Marie had to work hard to keep herself from making a comment about his harsh words, but she knew she was already on thin ice as well. Although she was starting to realize that maybe Lord Kent was a lot more bark than bite. Most of the time. And at least Soren didn’t seem too upset about it, two minutes later he was smiling and holding her hand as they walked into the dining room.

As promised, after dinner Snape sent Soren straight upstairs, although this time, he announced he would be up shortly to put him to bed. Before he excused himself from the table, he turned to Marie.

“Take whatever time you need for yourself this evening, I will be in my study as soon as I’m finished with Soren. You may knock when you’re ready to go over your plan.”

“Thanks. But I’m happy to get Soren ready for bed, it’s no problem.”

“No. I’d prefer that you focus on your own assignment tonight, I can surely handle putting a single unruly child to bed.”

His tone was light, which was a good sign. Marie was getting better at detecting his moods through the slightest variations in his voice, his face, the tiniest little upward curl of his lip. Everything about the man was so subtle, it was like a master class in micro expressions. 

 “Soren is not unruly! Come on, you have to admit, he’s a pretty amazing kid.”

Snape raised an eyebrow. “Perhaps. Still needs quite a lot of work, though.”

“Don’t we all,” Marie replied jokingly. 

“Some far more than others, Ms. Cloutier” he said as he pushed in his chair, giving her a knowing look as he made his way to the stairs. 

When Snape walked through the door, he found Soren brushing his teeth in the washroom. 

“Two minutes. Minimum. You should be brushing 30 seconds a quadrant to prevent tooth decay. If you’d like, I can put a charm on your toothbrush to alert you.”

Soren stared for a moment, confused. Was this, fatherly concern? The man had never watched him brush his teeth before. He shrugged his shoulders. “OK.”

Snape pulled out his wand and flicked it around briefly. “Good oral hygiene is essential. As a wizard, your teeth need to last you upward of 200 years. When you’re older I’ll show you some spells you can use to help. For now, make sure you brush. Properly. At least twice a day.”

“Yes, sir. I always brush my teeth. But this one is kind of loose.” Soren pulled out his toothbrush and wiggled at one of his incisors with his finger. “When I lost my front teeth, the Tooth Fairy came and gave me a galleon! Do you think the Tooth Fairy will know I’m here now? I hope she can find me cuz I think this tooth is gonna come out real soon. See?” He leaned his head back and wiggled it again with his mouth wide open in the mirror. 

The Tooth Fairy? Oh Merlin, he doesn’t really believe that does he? But something in Snape’s cold heart couldn’t bear to say anything that might hurt him. “I’m sure she’ll figure it out. But what on earth do you plan to do with a galleon?”

Soren thought for a moment. “I’m going to save up for a broom!”

Snape scoffed. “Absolutely not, you’re way too young for a broom, I have better things to do than regrow your bones on a daily basis.  And do you have any idea how much a broom costs these days? Far more than you have teeth, I assure you. You’d need the teeth from an entire grammar school to afford one.”

“Oh,” Soren said, disappointed. “There was a boy near my old house who had a broom. It was so cool! I wanted to ride it but he wouldn’t let me, so I put dirt in his sandwich when he wasn’t looking. He was mean.”

“That wasn’t very kind.” Snape raised an eyebrow. “Nonetheless, brooms at your age are way too dangerous. You’ll learn to fly when you’re much older.”

Soren narrowed his eyes in the mirror, clearly displeased. “Well, when I grow up I’m going to save all of my money and then I’ll get my own broom and I’ll fly whenever I want to.”

Snape didn’t love the attitude, but he was impressed with his resolve. There was no way in hell he would let him have a broom before he was 11, preferably before he was 17 (although he knew that was unrealistic), but he found himself reluctant to destroy his ambition. He was both fascinated and amused to see his own expressions on the boy’s tiny little face. “Yes, I’m sure you will. Now hurry up, rinse your mouth and get into bed, you’re stalling.”

“Are you going to read to me?” Soren stared at him through the mirror as he spat out the remainder of his toothpaste, wiping his mouth with the towel on the side of the sink. 

“Story time is a privilege for well-behaved children, not naughty little boys who disobey their fathers and go about wreaking havoc all day. Now get in bed.” Snape clapped twice to hurry him along.

Soren stepped down from his little step stool and walked to his bed, picking up his rabbit as he climbed on top of the mattress. “Ms. Cloutier said that reading is for everyone and it is an important part of my development.”

Snape had no clever response for that. “Well, you are welcome to read to yourself at any time during the day. But now it is time for lights out.” He pulled down the corner of the bedsheets for Soren to get in. 

“But I don’t like reading by myself, I’m slow, I like it when Ms. Cloutier reads to me, she does voices and everything,” Soren complained as he crawled under the covers.

“Well, then you have plenty of motivation to behave yourself tomorrow. Only good boys get bedtime stories, which I assure you, is not a descriptor that applies to you today.” Snape pulled the duvet up roughly. 

“I’m trying,” Soren said as he cuddled his rabbit to his chest. “It’s really hard, you know.”

Snape mindlessly tucked the covers around him. “Yes, the stress of being 7 must be immensely overwhelming. So many responsibilities, all of the minutiae you juggle daily to keep your life functioning. It must be incredibly trying to grow up in a manor house with two responsible adults who care for you, and a house elf at your beck and call. How do you do it?” 

“I don’t know. But I just try my best. Sometimes I make mistakes but then I just try to do better next time. Ms. Cloutier says that no one is perfect and it’s OK to have a bad day.” 

The sarcasm had obviously gone over his head completely and Snape was touched, briefly, by the little boy’s innocence. “That’s an excellent approach to life. Ms. Cloutier is quite right.”

Soren pushed up on his elbows and looked directly at his father. “Are you still mad at her?”

Snape wasn’t expecting that. “I am not. It is absolutely nothing for you to concern yourself with. Go to sleep.”

“I’m not tired, I was in bed all day.” Soren sat up a bit more. “But you shouted at her and I got really scared when you said you were going to make her leave. I don’t want her to ever leave us, I love her. She’s so nice and she’s a really good teacher, and you shouldn’t have been so mean to her.” Soren was scooting himself up in the bed, somehow managing to give his father a disapproving glare. “It wasn’t really her fault, you know. Everyone makes mistakes, you should be nicer.”

“First of all, mind your cheek.” Snape was trying to keep his emotions under control, but he was getting irritated. “Second of all, Ms. Cloutier made a serious error in judgment. I was very disappointed, and yes, I was angry. But we’ve talked about it and resolved it and there is nothing for you to worry about. So mind your own business and lay back down.” He gave him one of his signature looks, hoping that would be sufficient.

“I’m not tired.” Soren whined, crossing his arms defiantly. 

“Nonetheless, you will lay down and close your eyes. Don’t you dare argue with me, and if you have an ounce of self-preservation, you will wipe that insolent look off of your face and do as you’re told, immediately.”

Soren quickly put on his most innocent face and moved down slightly into the bed, not wanting to push his father over the edge. “But what if I can’t sleep?”

“Then you will stay in bed until you do. I’m in no mood to play games with you tonight, Soren. Now lay down and. Close. Your. Eyes.” Snape pulled out his wand and darkened the room with a quick swoosh. 

“Ohhhhh, look at the ceiling!!! Ms. Cloutier made that!” Soren was in awe of the charmed ceiling, watching the stars twinkle and the occasional comet shoot across the darkness. 

Snape looked up and had to admit, she’d done a brilliant job. He knew he would have loved this as a child, it was both soothing and engaging, entrancing even. He could imagine that staring at it would help relax and induce sleep even in the most challenging of insomniacs. Perhaps he should have her charm his ceiling.

“Father?” 

“What is it now?” Snape clipped, the irritation growing in his voice. 

“Can you tell me a story?”

“We’ve been through this. You’re going to bed early as a punishment, and it does not come with a storytime. But if you ask me one more time, it will absolutely come with a smacked bottom. Now lay down.” He clicked his fingers and pointed to the mattress.

Soren was wholly unaffected. “No, not a bedtime story. A story about my mummy, it’s getting hard to remember her. I can’t hear her voice anymore and I’m scared I’m going to forget her. Can you just tell me one thing? Please…just so I don’t forget?”

Snape felt like a knife had been shoved through his heart. He wasn’t emotionally prepared for these kinds of conversations, and he was immediately reminded why he should leave this job to Marie. “Fine. But lay your head all the way down and close your eyes first.”

Soren quickly complied, pulling his rabbit up to his chin and closing his eyes, turning toward his father and wrapping the duvet over his shoulder. “I’m ready!”

It took Snape a minute to think of something, he hadn’t seen the woman in 8 years, and she hadn’t exactly been on his mind the whole time. Nonetheless, he reached into his memory, not wanting to disappoint his son. “Your mother had long brown hair, and expressive, big beautiful brown eyes. Just like yours. When she smiled, all of her teeth were visible, including that one tooth on the upper right that was slightly crooked. When she laughed, she would cover her mouth and grip her abdomen while she rocked back and forth. She liked to laugh, she had a wonderful sense of humor.”

“I remember that!” Soren said, smiling. “And she always smelled like candy.”

“She did. Strawberries, and butter mixed with sugar.”

Soren reached a hand out. “I miss her.” His hand hung in the air, an open bid to his father for a small bit of affection.

“I know. I’m sorry.” Snape looked at the little boy’s hand for several more seconds before he finally put his own hand on top, pushing it gently back toward the bed. “Now go to sleep.”

“Goodnight father,” Soren rotated his fingers around in a desperate attempt to grasp his father’s hand one more time, desperate for comfort and connection. 

But before the boy could intertwine his fingers fully, Snape lifted his hand from the bed, resting it briefly on the top of Soren’s head. “Goodnight. Stay in bed. I don’t think I need to tell you what you can expect if I have to come back here again tonight.”

“No, sir.” Soren said, the emptiness gripping his heart at the obvious rejection. He pulled his rabbit in closer in a bid to fill the resounding void. 

Snape quickly pulled the duvet up a few inches. “Good. Now sleep.” Without another word, he tucked the blanket around the boy rather brusquely and walked to the door, closing it behind him. 

Soren stilled, freezing in place for several moments while trying to make sense of all of his feelings. Then, without warning, he let out a guttural cry, the grief in his heart being too much to cope with. He curled up into a ball to try to soothe himself, his rabbit held tightly in the middle of his arms. Despite his best efforts, there was an emptiness he couldn’t process and he sobbed hard into his pillow. After several minutes of heaving cries, he rolled onto his back and stared up to the ceiling, finding comfort in the twinkling stars and the colorful galaxies spinning in the darkness. He imagined that somewhere up there, the spirit of his mother was looking down on him. He kept watching, searching for her eyes and her smile, silent tears streaming down his face until his eyes became heavy, and he finally fell asleep. 

Marie waited until she heard Lord Kent close his door to the study. She was sitting downstairs, frozen, waiting to get it all over with. She figured she’d give him a few minutes to get settled, but she was way too nervous to wait too long. 

Finally she crept up the stairs, hovering for several moments before she finally knocked on the door. Immediately she heard the familiar “Enter”, and she reached for the doorknob, closing her eyes as she twisted it and pushed it forward. Without pausing or looking up, she made her way toward the desk. 

“Sit, please,” he said gently. 

Marie tossed several pieces of parchment onto the desk. “I’m really sorry, I didn’t get to finish it all. I tried, but I need your help.” 

Snape collected the papers, tapping them gently on the desk without taking his eyes off of Marie. “Take a breath, Ms. Cloutier, and sit down.”

She ran a hand through her hair and dropped into the chair. “OK. But I really did try, I just…it’s a lot. And, well, I didn’t finish. And before you tell me off, I really did work on it the whole time and I just couldn’t get to it all, and I don’t really know what I should put down because I am not sure I should even be doing this. I probably shouldn’t even have put all those things on my list, I just…I don’t know.”

“I see.” Snape took his time carefully reading through the papers, keeping his face still. He knew he had to be extremely careful how he reacted. She had poured her greatest vulnerabilities onto this parchment, and he wanted to treat them with care. Nearly two minutes ticked by before he finally looked up from the parchment. 

“You did a very good job, Ms. Cloutier. I’m quite pleased.”

Marie’s body flooded with endorphins at the praise, and she finally felt herself relax into the chair. “Oh, well, it’s obviously not finished, but…”

“That’s fine. I can help you from here if you’d like.”

It was the most soothing his voice had ever been and Marie finally had enough guts to look up at him. “Yes, please, I’d like that.”

“Good girl.”

Marie melted completely and before she knew what was happening, Lord Kent had stood up, taken her by the arm and was now escorting her to the couch. She allowed herself to be guided, completely until she felt her body make contact with the cold leather sofa. He took a seat next to her, her parchment in his hands. 

“Shall we begin at the top or would you prefer to walk me through it yourself?”

“Um, at the top is fine, I guess.”

“Very well. You started with #1– Do not forget my wand…seems rather straight-forward but should we engage further?”

Marie nodded. “Sure.”

“Very good. Tell me, Ms. Cloutier, where do you keep your want when you’re not using it?”

One by one, they went through her list, him peppering her with questions and her doing her best to answer them truthfully. 

`

Snape refrained from making any judgments, keeping his voice low and his face neutral, although he was quite surprised at some of the things she’d put on the list, there was definitely more to Marie than he knew. She was opening up about her past and her struggles as a grad student, and he was grateful that she trusted him enough to share. This was turning out even better than he’d hoped for, and he was quite looking forward to mentoring her in this way.  

“Tell me, Ms. Cloutier, what are your biggest aspirations?”

“I want to build my school…and just live a happy life. Have a family, maybe, friends, you know, the basic stuff. I don’t need a lot, I just want to feel fulfilled.”

“I see. And what do you think is stopping you from achieving that?”

Marie shrugged. “I mean, nothing in particular. I’m pretty goal-oriented, I’ve always achieved what I set out to achieve, I’m just…worn down, I guess. The last few years have been tough. I’ve always been so independent my whole life that people always assume I have everything under control. But no one ever really asks me if I need anything or I’m doing OK, so I guess I’ve never learned how to ask for help or support.”

Snape nodded his head. “That is rather exhausting. It sounds like burn-out, Ms. Cloutier. I’m sure as an educator, you’re familiar with the term.”

Marie nodded. “Yes. But now I don’t know how to fix everything.”

“Well, if you’re asking for my help, I will help you. One thing at a time. Is this everything? Or are there other things you haven’t written down?”  

No, it’s not everything. If you knew the whole truth, you probably wouldn’t even bother with me. “Yes, that’s all,” she lied with a forced smile. She’d avoided telling him just how bad things were with her financial situation, instead framing it as wanting to save for building her future school. She had not told him about the lien on her parent’s home and their vault, and the fact that she was hiding it from them and that she was currently ignoring all attempts by the goblins to contact her about repayment. In fact, even her parents didn’t know exactly where she was right now, no one had her address or a current means to contact her. She definitely hadn’t told him about Soren’s wand and how it was eating away at her. Part of her really wanted to, but she was way too ashamed.

“Then I’m sure you’ll start to feel better soon. Let’s start with the wand. I want you to check for it everytime you enter or leave a room. When you open a door, you will reach for your wand, touch it, and then proceed through the door. If you’ve forgotten it, you will obviously retrieve it, and make a note of that. I will ask you at each meal if you have it with you, and at the end of the day, you will let me know how you’ve done. Does that seem acceptable to you?”

“Yes. So what happens if I forget it?”

“What do you think should happen if you forget it? This is your plan, Ms. Cloutier,” he replied matter-of-factly. 

Marie couldn’t explain it, but it embarrassed her more having to come up with her own consequences, she would much rather just have him tell her. “I don’t really know. I feel like if I realize I’ve forgotten it before I leave the room, then nothing. But if I somehow manage to forget it long after I’ve left a room, or when you ask me, then maybe…I don’t know?” Marie’s ears burned thinking about it. “This is ridiculous, I feel really dumb.”

Snape raised an eyebrow. “Why? It is a perfectly normal way to change a habit or introduce more organization in your life. Some people keep a rubber band around their wrist and snap it every time they have a negative thought or impulse. Others fine themselves or pay out to a friend when they don’t go for a run or show up at the gym. Or they deny themselves dessert if they don’t meet their calorie goals. I’ve also known people who made themself run sprints or do pushups for every cigarette they had when trying to quit. I don’t think there’s anything unusual about giving oneself consequences, Ms. Cloutier. You seem averse, are you frightened to hold yourself accountable? Are you not sure you’re ready to make changes?”

Fuck, how does he read me like that. This is nuts!  She feigned nonchalance. “I guess. But I don’t really know…maybe you can give me some suggestions. To be honest, I’ve never really needed consequences, so I don’t have a clue. Since you’ve done this before, you probably know what works.”

Snape had to suppress his most depraved thoughts, if they were doing things his way, he could think of a lot of consequences he’d enjoy enforcing, none of which were professionally appropriate. Although he had an inkling that she’d probably respond very well to it. But he forced himself to remain passive.

“Well, let’s see. You could write a hundred lines of I will not forget my wand when I leave a room. You could go to bed thirty minutes early and deny yourself that time reading. You could do something physical- pushups or sit-up or wall-sits or go for a run.  I think given your precarious financial situation, a fine in this case would be inappropriate, but it is up to you, the possibilities are endless. What do you think would be the most effective deterrent for you?”

Marie wanted to disappear into the ground, all of them made her feel so…childish. That being said, she hadn’t actually forgotten her wand after the first incident, so she was sure she’d never have to actually worry about them. “I guess, taking away some of my reading time seems fine.”

Snape had to hide a smirk at her clear discomfort. “The other option is we put everything together. We’ll make one big chart- you check everything off during the day and in the evening you present it to me and we review it. Perhaps just the effort of having a checklist will be sufficient. You’ll get a gold star if you do things well, and a black mark if you do not. We will reward your gold stars, and there will be consequences for the black marks. For example, three black marks in a week, and you will spend your day off in the Manor, rather than out gallivanting with your friends. It will still be your day off in the sense that you will not be responsible for Soren in any way, but, we can add lines or chores or reflection time if that is required. We’ll see how things progress.”

“OK…I guess that could work.”

“This is for you, Ms. Cloutier, so if you do not think that will work or you do not want to do it that way, you should say so. I want your enthusiastic agreement. This is not for my benefit.”

Marie smiled sheepishly. “I’m not sure how enthusiastic I’m supposed to be about this, but I am willing to give it all a try.”

Snape stood up and returned to his desk, pulling out several pieces of parchment and sitting down in his chair. “Very well. So let’s write your daily and weekly check-list. Daily you will:

• Wake up by 7

• Check for your wand, make sure you do not leave the room without it

• Go for a brief walk, meditate, or do yoga before breakfast

• Brush teeth, do skincare routine 

• Eat breakfast, no more than one cup of coffee (Lord Kent will do a wand-check)

• Take time to tidy your room- make your bed, organize what you need for the day. Wand check before you leave your room before going to class.

• Check wand before you leave the classroom for lunch (Lord Kent will do a wand-check at lunch)

• Take time to rest after lunch- rest or do something related to self-care. Write in a journal, write a letter to a friend or family, read, meditate

• Check wand before leaving room/entering the classroom

• Spend 30-60 mins before dinner reading, resting, or engaging in self-care (Lord Kent will spend this time with Soren reading or doing schoolwork).

• Wand check at dinner

• Check-in with Lord Kent at 8pm after Soren goes to bed 

• Lights out by 11:00pm- no more reading, writing, etc. 

“Now then, each week, you will do the following at some point at your discretion:”

• Send one letter to your parents

• Reach out to one friend, whether by letter or to meet them in person during day off

• Over the weekend spend 1 hour organizing finances, making budgets, business plans for your school, paying bills, etc. Lord Kent is available to help

Snape wrote everything out clearly on a piece of parchment, then with his wand his tapped it and said a few incantations and all of it was neatly bound in a leather journal with a calendar, a space for notes, and a check box for each item. He called Marie over to sit across from him with a quick gesture, and handed her the journal over the desk.

“We’ll start there. Perhaps just the accountability to yourself will go a long way. Sometimes even just the small dopamine hit of being able to put a checkmark in the box will be enough motivation to get you through without needing much else. It will also establish a good routine, and hopefully within a few weeks, this routine will become second-nature and you will no longer need a checklist. We’ll see.”

Marie looked at the journal in her hands, she couldn’t lie to herself, she was kind of looking forward to this whole project. “This is great. Thank you, Lord Kent.”

“As for things like losing your temper, or arguing with me about Soren, we’ll take them on a case by case basis. We can discuss it in our evening check-in and if you feel it is not in line with the goals you’re trying to achieve, we’ll add a black mark to your tally.”

“So, every night I just check in with you?”

“Yes. At 8 o’clock or after Soren goes to bed. You will keep track of your checklist, and I will keep track of your stars and your black marks,” he said. “But you will need to decide what they mean. How you plan to trade them in.”

“I don’t really know…” 

Snape put up a hand. “Think about it. We can discuss it tomorrow again when you check in after your first day on your new plan. Again, if at any point along the way, this isn’t working for you, or it is working for some things but not others, I want you to let me know so we can make the adjustments.”

“OK.”

“Very well, that is a lot for one day. Tomorrow we’ll start fresh. Do you have any other questions? Anything else you’d like to say?”

“Just that I really appreciate your help. And that I’m grateful you’re giving me another chance. I really want to do my best, so thank you for being willing to help me.” Marie was being sincere, and she felt a sense of relief at handing off some of this. Just knowing someone else cared that she was burnt out and needed help and was willing to do it. Even if she did feel silly about needing it. He had actually built quite a bit of rest and “self-care” into her plan and she hoped that would make a big difference in how she felt moving forward.

“It’s my pleasure, Ms. Cloutier. I am very proud of you for being so honest and open, I know that can be difficult, but it shows me that you’re committed. I realize this requires a great deal of trust on your part as well, and I want you to know that I take that very seriously.”

His words of praise should have felt good, but instead, they made her nauseous. She knew there were still several things she was hiding from him and it made her feel sick. He was being so kind and genuine in his care for her and his desire to help her, she just wished she’d have been honest with him sooner. “Thank you Lord Kent. I really appreciate that.”

“Now then, lights are out at 11pm, but you would probably benefit from a nice long bath and an early bedtime tonight. It has been a trying few days. Up to you, of course, but if I pass by your room and see a light on even a minute after 11pm, that is going in your book.” He gave her his sternest look, but she could tell he was putting it on. “We wouldn’t want to start off with a black mark on our very first day, now would we?”

“No, believe me, I’m too tired. I plan to go to bed early.”

“Good girl.” He stood and walked over to her chair, offering her a hand to get up. 

“We’ll see how you do on your own, but if you continue to stay up reading past lights out, I will charm every book in this manor to slam shut at 10pm, so keep that in mind.” He gave her a small smirk.

Marie smiled back at him. “I don’t think that will be necessary.”

“We’ll see.”  He walked her to the door and opened it up. “Goodnight, Ms. Cloutier. Take some rest.”

“Goodnight, Lord Kent.” She had to squeeze past him to get through the door and although they didn’t touch, she could feel the heat radiating off of his body, and the delicious but subtle smell that she was becoming addicted to. Sandalwood, leather, the smell of rain in the forest, a hint of musk. She tried to breathe it in without being obvious about it. 

The walk to her room felt like she was floating, like an enormous weight had been lifted, while at the same time she was intoxicated. His authority, his organization, the fact that he had given her a checklist (although technically it was her own checklist, but he was helping her with it). Her heart was racing as she turned on her bath, mentally, emotionally, and physically exhausted from all of it. 

As she sank into the water, she closed her eyes and all she could think of was him. And how she wanted to please him, but how she craved his stern looks and his attention, his control…it was like having a crush on her teacher, but so much more complex. He was her boss, but whatever had just happened had crossed over some line. He hadn’t been inappropriate in any way, but they were far outside of normal territory

Chapter Text

For the first time in ages, Marie woke up before her alarm went off, a new energy coursing through her. She took a moment to open her eyes before she rolled over and stretched, laying on her back as she replayed some of the scenes from the night before, electrified by the possibilities that lay ahead for her today. 

She sat up, but before she’d even taken a step out of bed, there was a knock on her door. She stood up, grabbed her wand and threw on a dressing gown before realizing it was the wrong damn one. “Just one moment, please!” 

She tossed her wand on the bed and searched frantically for the other one before she finally grabbed it and put it in the pocket of her robe. If she’d had a moment more she might have considered casting a quick spell to tidy her hair, but instead she opened the door. ”Good morning!”

Lord Kent was standing there, fully dressed, looking alert and perfectly put together as always. “Good morning, Ms. Cloutier. I hope you slept well.”

“I did, thanks.” Not a total lie, she’d made a point to have her lights out before 11pm—hoping he would check—but her body clock was so off that even though she was exhausted, she still laid awake, tossing and turning, and indulging herself in inappropriate thoughts until well after one in the morning. 

“This was just a courtesy reminder that you are to begin your day at 7am. Do you have your wand?”

Marie pulled out Soren’s wand and showed it to him. “Of course. Never without it.”

“May I?” He took it in his hands for a moment and rolled it around in his fingers. He’d been so angry when he found it, he hadn’t taken a very good look at it, although as he’d thought back on it, he’d been thoroughly confused. “Spruce, is it? I must say, when I first saw it I thought it was quite an unexpected wand wood for you, Ms. Cloutier. I thought perhaps I’d been mistaken, but it appears I was not. What’s in the core, if I may ask?”

Oh God, he knows. “Unicorn, of course,” she said smiling, hoping he wasn’t becoming suspicious. She actually had no idea what was in the core of this blasted thing, but her real wand was unicorn, so that was the first thing that came to mind. “And you know what they say, the wand chooses the witch and all.” You liar, stop making it worse!

Snape raised an eyebrow, “Indeed.”  He ran his hand over it once more, taking it’s features. “How extraordinary,” he exclaimed, before handing it back to her.

Don’t panic, Marie, he doesn’t know!  She took her wand back as soon as he offered it to her and shoved it into the pocket of her dressing gown, hoping to end any more discussion about it. “Anyway, thanks for coming by to check.”

“What are your plans this morning? A walk? Meditation? Yoga?”

“Oh, um…I haven’t really thought about it yet.” She glanced over her shoulder to the window and saw the morning light looked bright, and it didn’t seem to be raining or overly foggy. “The weather looks decent, maybe I’ll take a short walk, get some fresh air in my lungs.”

“If you would like some company, I’d be more than happy to join you,” Snape said, hoping he hadn’t been too bold. “But I wouldn’t want to intrude, this is part of your self-care.”

Marie’s heart jumped at his offer, but she didn’t want to appear too eager. “Sure, if you’d like. I just need a few minutes to get ready.”

“Take your time, Ms. Cloutier, I’ll be in the parlor whenever you’re ready.” He turned around to leave but quickly looked back at her. “Make sure you wear something warm, it can be quite crisp here in the mornings, I wouldn’t want you to catch a chill.”

She smiled. “I will, thank you Lord Kent.”

He nodded and headed for the stairs. 

After Marie closed the door, she let out a silent squeal to herself. OMG, Marie, stop acting like a teenager. But she couldn’t help it, she was giddy. Was this a date? Or was he just making sure that she stuck to her plan. Either way she was more excited to start her day than she had been in a while. 

She didn’t want to keep him waiting too long, but she had to change several times until she’d found an outfit that she felt was just right. At first she’d tried one of her new hair and make-up spells but after looking at herself in the mirror she thought she looked like she was trying to hard, so instead she wiped her face clean, threw her hair up in a bun and kept things simple, just some moisturizer and a lip gloss. She ran out the door before she realized she had the wrong damn wand again and went back to get Soren’s wand and put it in her sleeve. Your wand on the right, Soren’s on the left. 

It wasn’t until she reached the stairs that she realized she’d forgotten to put on a sweater and had to go back again, not wanting to disappoint the man after he’d made a point to make sure she was warm enough. By the time she made it down the stairs, she was practically out of breath. 

Snape was sitting calmly in his armchair sipping tea and reading the Daily Prophet. He looked up at her as she came in, having heard her almost manic footsteps and heavy breathing as she raced down the stairs. “Is everything alright, Ms. Cloutier? You seem almost…dyspneic.”

“Sorry, I just forgot my sweater so I had to run back.” She tried to look relaxed but her face was flushed and she was having to work to hide her labored respirations. 

He set down his tea and folded his paper. “I told you there was no need to rush. The idea is to start your day with something calm to focus your mind. It defeats the purpose if you end up more frazzled. Take a moment to breathe and compose yourself.”

Marie smiled, brushing a piece of stray hair from her face, hoping she didn’t look too disheveled. “I’m fine. Really. Ready whenever you are.”

Snape gave her a mildly disapproving look but stood up, running a slow hand down his robes before walking to the door that opened directly into the back garden. “Come along, then.”

The sun was fully up over the horizon, but there was still a bit of dew on the grass and a mild fog that made the air damp, causing it to feel much colder than expected. Marie was glad she’d put on a sweater, but she wished she’d worn her heavier robes. Of course, Lord Kent was in his usual thick wool pants and frock coat, but even he had put on a thicker set of robes for their walk. 

They strolled in silence for several minutes, Snape looking out at his vast grounds, soaking them all in. This was probably his favorite part of the whole Manor. Designing the gardens and planting everything had been an enormous part of his healing in the first year after his near death. Watching the plants bloom and grow after the land had been neglected for decades was like being reminded that new life could still come forth and thrive, even in a place that had lain barren for years. He poured his energy and emotions into the soil, planting and tilling, and tending to each and every seedling like it was his child. And now, looking over it all, he felt proud of what he’d created. And aside from the maze, which he’d customized with several self-made charms, he’d used very little magic to do it. The physical labor had been essential to his transformation, he needed to feel the dirt in his hands and pour his literal sweat and tears into the earth. And when it was finished, he’d never been more satisfied. Watching the flowers and leaves come and go as things died and came back again had been a beautiful reminder that life had its seasons, and that it was both fleeting and eternal at the same time.

But now his thoughts were heavy with worry about what he was going to do with Soren, and it was eating at him constantly. Part of him was desperate to tell Marie, just to share the emotional burden, but he was nowhere near ready to open himself up in that way. He’d sworn to himself he would shut the door on his past permanently and never look back— it was the only way he’d been able to move forward in peace. So there was no way he wanted her to know who he really was, what he’d done, the darkness in his past. That person was gone, he reminded himself, like the perennials in his garden, he had died and returned anew, the essence was the same, but it was a new life now, and he hoped this time, the world around him would be less hostile, allowing him to grow and thrive in a way he never could before. 

“I should have worn thicker robes. You weren’t joking about the chill,” Marie said, rubbing her hands together and breathing into them.  

Her voice snapped him out of his thoughts and back to the present.  Snape stopped dead in his tracks and looked at her. “I will never joke when it comes to your health, Ms. Cloutier.” Without another word, he removed his outer robes and slung them around her. 

“No, please! I’ll be fine!” 

“Don’t argue with me, Ms. Cloutier,” he said tersely as he adjusted the robes on her far smaller frame. He fussed like a parent trying to dress an uncooperative toddler, first pulling the robes tightly around her, then tucking each arm through the sleeves and pulling it up around her shoulders and neck, before cinching it tightly around her waist until he was satisfied she’d be warm. “I’m not being gallant, I’m being practical. If you fall sick, I’ll be forced to take care of Soren all on my own and I’m afraid that would be highly inconvenient for me at the moment.”

“Yes, what could possibly be worse than spending a minute more than necessary with your son.” She could tell by his tone and the look in his eye that he was only kidding, but before she could say anything else, she was hit by the instant warmth of his thick, heavy robes as he gift-wrapped every inch of her completely, followed by his gorgeous smell enveloping her from all sides. Suddenly she felt a rush of heat to her core, and it had nothing to do with the extra layer of fabric he’d put around her. It was heaven.

“Precisely. I’m glad you understand.” Next he pulled out his wand and reached for both of her hands, gathering them up in one of his. They were freezing, but also soft and delicate, and they felt tiny inside of his own large hand. He had a sudden urge to bring them to his lips, but he controlled his impulses and instead gently tapped the top of her wrists with his wand. “Your hands are like ice. You should wear mittens next time.”

“You know what they say, cold hands, warm heart,” she quipped awkwardly, immediately cringing to herself. Shut up, Marie, you sound like a freaking idiot. Before she could say something else ridiculous, she felt her hands warm considerably, but it was unlike any warming spell she’d ever felt. 

“What an adorable little adage to compensate for poor circulation, or in your case, even poorer preparation.” 

She ignored his snarky comment. “What spell was that?” she asked in complete awe. It felt like her hands were encased in a warm hug. Most warming spells lasted a few seconds, heating things up but then needing to be recast because they couldn’t hold the heat. But this…the warmth was somehow contained around her. “This is incredible!”

Snape gently released her hands and replaced his wand. “Just a little spell I came up with. It’s loosely based on the concepts behind the Bubble-Head charm, except you create a pocket of air and heat around your hands or feet or body, anything really. But it works best in a smaller area. I find it lasts far longer than the average warming spell.”

It was something he’d spent years perfecting, finding it invaluable on those nights he was off doing tasks for Dumbledore or even You-Know-Who. And although he would never admit it, sometimes when he was awake in his bed at night feeling particularly lonely, he would cast it around himself, just so he could feel the comfort of being held, even if no one was really there. But he would die before he ever admitted that. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone who just creates spells like that. How did you learn how to do it? They definitely didn’t teach us that at school.” Marie was constantly surprised by his magical prowess. He was incredibly gifted, it seemed like such a travesty for him to just sit alone in this big Manor letting all of those skills go to waste. 

“I enjoy innovating. From the time I went to Hogwarts, I spent every minute of my free time consuming vast amounts of information on the theory of magic, and then I just started experimenting. Once you begin to understand how the spells really work, there is a lot of potential to rework and improve them, or even create brand new ones.”

“Wow,” she said. “Well thanks, I feel much warmer now.” She tried to give him a smile but he turned away before she could make eye contact.

Marie slowed her gait slightly, not wanting the walk to end too soon. There were several paths running through the gardens, but they took the longer one that looped all the way around and would eventually bring them right back to where they started.

“You didn’t spend your free time playing Quidditch and running secret missions to the kitchens late at night with your friends? I swear, we wasted so much time at school getting up to the silliest things. And talking about boys, of course. Lots and lots of time talking about boys,’ Marie laughed, hoping that by sharing something from her own school days, he’d share more as well. 

“As you know, I’m quite a solitary person. And I enjoy scholarly pursuits. I went to school to learn, not socialize, so no, I didn’t run around after curfew stealing food from the kitchens like some kind of depraved street urchin. I studied, I read, I practiced more and more difficult magic until I could master it.”

“But why? What’s the point in learning all of that and never getting to use it?”

Snape waited several seconds before deciding how to respond to that. “You should be careful making assumptions, Ms. Cloutier. You know how that saying goes.”

Marie knew he wasn’t going to tell her much more, the man was an enigma. She was hoping he might give her more of a glimpse into who he was and what he was about, but as always, he brushed her off the moment she tried to ask him anything remotely personal. 

“Well, you missed out. Some of the best years of my life were at Beauxbatons, it was like a constant adventure. I met some of the best friends of my life there…” she stopped herself and her smile fell slightly. She’d done a terrible job keeping up with some of them. Several had families of their own now, and they were scattered all over the place, but still, she should have made more of an effort.

“How quaint.” Snape could easily say that while those were far from the worst years of his life, they certainly weren’t his best either. And he didn’t have any friends. Not wanting to sound pathetic, he instead turned it around. “You do realize school is meant for learning, Ms. Cloutier. That’s why it is called the Beauxbatons Academy of Magic, not the Beauxbatons Palace for Mischief and Gossip.”

“Well, maybe it can be both,” she chuckled. “ L’académie de l'espièglerie et commérages, it has a nice ring to it actually.” She smiled and then realized they were nearing the end of the path. It felt too soon, she was enjoying this time alone with him. And for once, she wasn’t in trouble. 

“You should know, learning for the sake of gaining knowledge is a completely worthy endeavor all on its own. One doesn’t need to do anything with it for it to have value. Knowledge for the sake of knowledge—like art— has intrinsic value by virtue of existing. A painting isn’t any less beautiful or meaningful if no one ever sees it. The same goes for knowledge.”

Marie thought about this for a moment, realizing she’d never had these kinds of deep conversations with anyone else before, it was like she was satiating a hunger she didn’t know she had. “True. I guess I haven’t spent enough time learning for pleasure. Years and years and years of school, cramming in everything they want you to know and then spitting it back out on an exam later, only to forget half of it a few years down the road. It’s kind of sad, actually. I like learning, but I feel like I’ve rarely had the time to do it just for myself, not for a purpose.” This felt particularly true considering how much she’d spent on her education over the years. 

“I find formal education to be rather like eating in a cafeteria or a buffet. You hold out your tray, people slop a bunch of food on it, or perhaps you serve yourself, and you move down the line. There’s a lot available to you, but everyone essentially gets the same limited offerings, and while you can certainly fill up on it, after a while it becomes almost unbearable to have another bite. Whereas learning on your own is like dining at a fine restaurant, where you get to choose from a wide variety of options and will be served things you didn’t even know existed. Sometimes you realize it’s not for you, but other times it challenges your palate. Sometimes you are satiated, other times it leaves you wanting more. Desperate to seek out another meal just as delicious somewhere else. You are free to sample all kinds of cuisines, to savor them slowly or gorge yourself on them until you can’t take another bite. And maybe, you will get just the right combination of flavors that will inspire you to want to create something just as delicious on your own.”

Marie was hypnotized listening to him talk. “I’ve never thought of it that way, but it makes sense.” Wow, fucking brilliant, Marie. Come on, at least try to sound a little bit smarter!!  It was a beautiful metaphor, but then her stomach growled and all she could think about was breakfast, which made her feel even more ridiculous. 

As they got to the end of the path, Snape turned to look at her. “Thank you for allowing me to accompany you this morning, I needed that. I hope we can do it again some time.”

Without waiting for a response, he walked to the door and held it open for her. 

“Thank you,” she said, as she walked through it. Once she was inside, she took off his heavy robes and handed them back to him, instantly feeling a sense of loss and loneliness. “Thanks for helping me stay warm.” 

He took the robes and nodded. “Perhaps next time you will dress more appropriately for the weather. A thin cardigan is hardly what I had in mind when I advised you to dress warmly. And I had better see mittens on your hands next time you go out in the morning. Really, Ms. Cloutier, you need to take better care of yourself before you fall ill.”

He was being a tad patronizing, but Marie loved it when he talked to her that way, the combination of a mild scold laced with care and concern. Perfection. So of course she had to return it with a bit of sass, just to push him a bit further. “I know, isn’t that why you put me on a self-improvement plan? Although at this point I think I’m old enough to know how to dress myself, thank you very much. Besides, everyone knows that you don’t get sick from the weather, it’s because of viruses and bacteria. Or did you not read about that when you were doing all of this learning in your spare time?”

Snape raised an eyebrow and lowered his voice. “My my, the fresh air must have gone to your head, Ms. Cloutier. That is quite a bit of cheek for this time of the morning. I would mind myself if I were you, I’d hate for you to end up with a black mark on your very first day, even before you’ve even had breakfast.”

“For what? I haven’t broken any of my rules,” she said in her most innocent voice.

“Haven’t you? This isn’t exactly the good example you’re supposed to model for Soren, now is it? I think you know exactly how I’d respond to that kind of cheek coming from him, so you’d do well to make sure you don’t speak to me like that in front of him. Speaking of which, it’s getting late, you should probably go wake him so he can get ready for breakfast. It’s not a holiday, we have a schedule to keep to.” 

Marie blushed slightly, pleased with herself that she’d gotten exactly what she hoped for, a bit of irritation, a veiled threat, and a stern look but still with a tone she knew meant he was enjoying it. She loved goading him and skating along the edge, and she was pretty sure he reveled in having a reason to scold and lecture her further. 

After breakfast, Snape went down to the dungeons as he usually did, but today he was finalizing a new batch of Polyjuice. He’d actually made several, and was modifying them slightly, but he needed Harry to bring him the potion they used at the Ministry if he was going to try to brew something that was capable of interfering with it. Whatever it was, it wasn’t something publicly available, or even anything that had been published in the scientific journals. It was obviously something they’d developed internally and without a sample, he had no idea what he needed to do to interfere with it. 

Snape was so deep in concentration that he nearly missed lunch, and it was obvious to Marie that his mind was somewhere else. He checked her wand, of course, but otherwise ate quickly and said very little. 

Before he stepped away from the table, he addressed both of them. “Mr. Potter will be here this afternoon. We have business to attend to first, but perhaps I can bring him by the classroom when we’re finished. I know you’ve been curious about meeting him, Ms. Cloutier, so congratulations, today all of your dreams come true,” he said with an extremely sarcastic drawl. 

“And me! I want to see him too! Can I show him my bank? Oh and how we do maths with the baking set?”

“I imagine nothing would thrill him more.” Snape turned toward Marie. “However, I don’t want to interfere with your lesson plans, so if that is not acceptable to you, please let me know and we’ll do it another time.”

Soren kneeled up on the chair and leaned on top of the table, putting his hands together like a prayer. “Please let him come, Ms. Cloutier! I told him all about you and I want to show him what I’m learning and he’s really nice!”

Snape clicked his fingers. “Sit down properly, and don’t beg. You know better.”

“It’s no problem at all, Lord Kent, I’d love to meet Mr. Potter and give him a quick tour of the classroom. And obviously Soren will be very happy to show him what he’s been learning.”

Soren celebrated silently, he could see his father was in no mood today for the least bit of nonsense. Not that he ever really was, but especially not today it seemed. 

“Very well. I shall see you both later.” Snape turned his attention to Soren one last time. “And I expect you to be on your best behavior this afternoon. I don’t want Mr. Potter to think I’m letting you play about all day instead of getting a proper education. And you might want to thank him for his help in putting out the fire in your room. He was surprisingly…adequate.”

Snape puttered in the dungeons before returning to the parlor to greet Harry, who came through on time, and thankfully alone. 

“Good to see you, sir.” 

“Do you have the potion?” Snape asked gruffly, ignoring the man’s friendly greeting and getting right to the point. 

“Yes, of course.”

“Right, follow me. We’ll be conducting these experiments in my potions lab.” Snape turned and Harry followed behind him, taking the winding stairs down to the dungeon. 

Harry was impressed with the size of it, and as he looked around at the hundreds of ingredients jarred lining the shelves, he couldn’t help but get flashbacks to Snape’s office at Hogwarts. The man had set everything up so similarly, that he was hit by a wave of nostalgia, even though he’d never been there before. 

Snape clicked his finger. “Quit daydreaming, Potter. We have important work to do. Give me the potion.”

Harry pulled it out from his robes. “This was all I could get, so we’ll just have to use it sparingly.”

“I know potions have never been your forte, Potter, but some of us are perfectly capable of making sparing use of ingredients. Unlike you, I’m not planning to blow up 20 batches of it with my incompetence, this is more than sufficient.” He snatched the bottle from Harry’s hand. “Now sit,” he said, pointing at one of the stools by his lab bench.   

For the next several minutes, Snape took samples of the potion and dropped them into various vials containing a multitude of different potions, trying to decipher what the active compounds were. 

Harry watched in awe as his former teacher worked with speed and finesse, a look of deep concentration etched on his face. He had a million questions he was dying to ask the man, but he knew Snape well enough to know when to keep his mouth shut. 

“It’s Ashwagandha, centaur hair, yarrow root…and it appears there is some kind of essence of Veritaserum, although not quite. I’ll need to run a few more tests to be sure. For now, I think it’s best to run an experiment to see how it reacts with the Polyjuice I’ve brewed.”

Snape reached for a vial he’d bottled earlier, and then went to a shelf and pulled down a box. When he opened the lid, there were about 100 different small compartments, each of them containing locks of hair. On the lid of the box, in a grid, was a key. Some had names, others just description. “F, 20s, dark skin” or “M, 80s, blue eyes.”

Harry nearly gasped, he’d never seen anyone who’d amassed a collection of human hair in this manner, it was both creepy and fascinating. He stared as he tried to decipher some of the names on there.

“What? It’s incredibly useful. Besides, most of this is leftover from…before. And close your mouth, Potter, you’ll catch a fly.” Snape reached for some hair in the top left hand corner, dropping it into the Polyjuice. 

Harry closed his mouth as requested.

“Last time you took my blood for the potion. What did you have from Soren?”

“We used his hair, sir. Just a bit.”

Snape stared. “Yet you chose to use my blood? Can you use either?” This could give him a clue to some of the magical properties at work in the potion. 

“I think so. I just figured you didn’t want me touching your gorgeous, flowing locks.” Harry gave him a cheeky smile. “To be honest, they always use blood for the adults. I think so they can be sure. You’re not the first person who has wanted to interfere with results from a paternity potion.”

Snape scowled. “I’m not trying to shirk my familial duties or take advantage of a defenseless orphan, I have a very good reason for what I’m doing. And don’t give me cheek, Potter, I don’t care who you are, I’m still your elder.”

Harry tried not to smile and nodded his head. “Of course, sir. I apologize.” There was something endearing about being told off by the man after all these years, after everything they’d both been through. It harkened him back to a much more innocent time in his life. And he couldn’t quite explain it, but ever since he’d found out the truth about Snape and all he’d done for him through the years, he’d developed a kind of fondness for the man, even if he was more surly than he’d ever been. 

“Well, we’ll try both. It might actually be the key to finding a workaround with this potion.”

“I hadn’t thought of that,” Harry said. 

“Unsurprising.” Snape said flatly. “Now we’ll start with a control to make sure the potion reacts properly to me prior to the Polyjuice. I had Tinny cut some of Soren’s hair while he slept.” He unwrapped a small piece of parchment that had several locks of dark black hair. He took a few strands and added it into the paternity potion, and it changed from green to blue.

“That’s what it usually does when you add the first sample,” Harry said. 

Snape carefully decanted the potion into three smaller vials, hoping to save as much of the original as possible in case he needed to run more tests. “Very well, we’ll start with my blood.”

Unlike last time, Snape took it upon himself to draw blood from his finger, knowing his precision wand work wasn’t going to result in the loss of hand. He would have never trusted Harry to do that, he was liable to maim him permanently, and he happened to want and need his fingers.  He squeezed a few drops into the first vial and it bubbled and fizzed before turning gold, just as it had done previously. 

Next Snape pulled out a few of his hairs and put them in the second vial, and it was less dramatic, but eventually it turned a similar, although far less shimmering gold. 

“So we know it works with hair. Perhaps, then it would be possible just to do a bait and switch.”

“What do you mean?” Asked Harry.

“I mean, Potter, that the hair I give them is my own, while the rest of me is under the influence of Polyjuice.” 

“I don’t know, sir. They almost always insist on using blood for this very reason.”

“Is there any circumstance when they will accept a hair sample instead?”

“I’ve never seen it happen with an adult, only for the kids.”

“Fine. Now let’s see how the potion reacts when I take the Polyjuice.” Snape took a sip of the freshly brewed Polyjuice and Harry watched as his face contorted and his hair changed from black to a mousy brown, his eyes a pale blue, and his frame shrunk until he was looking at a random middle aged man with a round face and a soft body in clothes that were far too big for him, although a few of the buttons were bulging in the middle. “Quit staring, Potter, it’s no one you know. A Muggle from Cornwall, if I remember correctly.”

“Right, sorry sir.” It was odd hearing Snape’s caustic words and distinctive delivery in someone else’s body and with a completely different tone. It was still…Snape-like, but very much lacking some of the intimidation that came with the deep voice, hardened face, and imposing figure. In fact, if they weren’t in the midst of something so serious, Harry would have been downright amused.

Snape repeated the experiment, squeezing his blood into the vial and waiting to see a reaction. Nothing happened. He squeezed in two more drops, but there was no change.

Next he reached up and pulled out several of the light brown hairs, throwing them into the test vial. Still no change. 

“Sorry, sir.” Harry said, knowing the man would be disappointed. “It’s not recognizing you as the father.”

“Yes, Potter, I can clearly see that.”  Snape sneered, as he reached for a vial of his Polyjuice antidote, swigging it aggressively to change back to his own body. 

Harry could see that he was crushed, even though his face had changed very little, but there was a sadness in his eyes he could only recognize because he’d seen it before. In Snape’s memories, and as he lay dying.

“Unfortunate, but not entirely unexpected. At least now I have a better understanding of some of the properties of the potion.” Snape feigned nonchalance, but he was gutted. He knew he was running out of time and his potion had failed. 

“I was really hoping this would work. I’m not sure how much longer I can delay them.”

“Well, figure it out, Potter,” Snape spat. “I don’t care what you have to do, but I need more time.” He was starting to panic now, realizing he needed to start from scratch and had days, if that, before the Ministry came barging in to take Soren. 

“I can’t. It is out of my realm of influence, sir. I’m sorry.”

Snape towered over him. “The Boy-Who-Lived, the hero who saved the entire wizarding world, incapable of using his fame and status to buy me another week or two? You vanquished the Dark Lord as a barely legal brat, and now you’re telling me you can’t possibly find a solution to this? Oh for Merlin’s sake, Potter, don’t give me that nonsense.”

“I swear, I can’t.”

“You’re lying. You can, but you won’t, there’s a difference. I know you detest me, but this isn’t about me, it is about saving my innocent child from trauma or ruin. I am confident I can find a solution, but I need more time. Tell them we’re on holiday, or that Soren has been sent out of the country to a distant relative, or that our entire house has Dragon Pox. I don’t care how you do it, but do something. I. Need. More. Time.” 

Harry took a deep breath. “I don’t think you realize how serious this is, sir.  When it was first created, the Children’s Ministry was overwhelmed, but now it has been a few years, there are tons of people working there with not a lot to do…you’re at the top of their list. Everyone is wondering if this is the illegitimate son of Severus Snape and what he is possibly doing in the north of England in some random wizard’s manor house. 

Snape reached out and grabbed his shirt, pulling him closer. “Don’t you dare call him illegitimate, Potter. I might not have known he existed for the first 7 years of his life, but Soren is my son, and no child should ever be dehumanized with a label like that. He’s as legitimate as you or I. Don’t let me ever hear that abhorrent word come from your mouth again.” Snape sneered, baring his teeth, his eyes electric with anger as he released him. 

“Sorry, sir. You’re absolutely right.” Harry was shaken, but suitably remorseful. He hadn’t realized just how fiercely protective Snape was over the boy.

Snape had no response to Harry’s acquiescence. “Well, what are you going to do? If I need to, I will take him and disappear. Don’t think I’m incapable.”

“I have no doubt, sir.”

“I don’t want you to placate me, Potter, I want you to do something.” Snape’s frustration was growing. 

“I’ll try my best. Really. But I don’t think you know how much attention this has kicked up internally.”

“Then make something up. Create a diversion. Burn down the whole department. Get everyone sick with the flu. It’s not that hard, Potter. I spent years of my life coming up with extraordinary lies and grand displays to cover for your reckless behavior. To divert the Dark Lord, to keep his attention elsewhere while I played three-dimensional chess. I did it for years. Surely you can do it for a few weeks. I need more time. I’m working on several new potions, but I need more time.”

Harry had never seen this kind of desperation from his professor before, whatever he might say, it was obvious the man cared deeply for his son. It was also clear he loathed being dependent on Harry. 

“Well? Are you going to do it, or not? If you’re planning to be useless, I need to know now so I can devise my own plan.”

“It’s not that easy…”

“Useless. As expected. I don’t even know why I thought for a moment I could even begin to count on you.”

“It’s complicated…I have a baby on the way, you know.”

Snape scowled, deeply. “And? Do you expect me to throw you a party? People procreate every day, Potter, it’s not an achievement. Even despite my greatest efforts to avoid it, even I ended up with a child.”

“I’m just saying, I have to be careful. I can’t risk losing my job or getting into trouble with the Ministry… Ginny and the baby need me.”

“Hogwash. You’re the bloody savior of the world, you could scrawl ten words on a piece of parchment, publish it and wake up the next day as a best-selling author. If I’m supposed to be concerned for your reputation and your financial well-being, Potter, I am not.”

“I’m just saying, I have to think about other people now.”

Snape scoffed. “Oh really? Isn’t that rich. You didn’t give a toss whose lives you put in danger with your shenanigans the entire time you were at Hogwarts. But what is that, the Gryffindor spirit? You have to make a big production now about how you put others first and sacrifice yourself to be a martyr?” Snape gave him a slow clap. “A true hero is amongst us.”

“Sir, please.” Harry knew it was like dealing with a wounded animal. Snape was disappointed and afraid, and he was lashing out by being cruel. 

 “I apologize that I’m not your usual cheering section, Potter, next time I’ll be sure to recruit others, I know it must be impossible to do anything without at least a dozen people there to tell you how magnificent and brave you are.”  Snape was really on a roll now, all of the feelings he’d been harboring for years were finally erupting out. He didn’t know where it was coming from, but he wasn’t going to stop now. 

“Please, Professor. I just need to be really careful.”

“What’s this? Harry Potter…being careful? Do you have any idea what torture I endured, for years, trying to protect you, having to lie for you and cover for you every time you had a hare-brained idea that put your life at risk? I have far more scars on my body from that than you even have years of life.”

Harry looked ashen. “Really?”

“Who do you think covered for your recklessness? Who suffered for it? Whose body and mind were invaded and tortured to protect your innocence every time you did something irrational. You have no idea, Potter, what I endured to keep you alive.”

“I’m sorry…I was just a kid. If I’d known…”

“If you’d known? You were an arrogant, spoiled brat who was always too big for his britches, who gallivanted around the castle spouting nonsense, engaging in dangerous stunts that constantly put others at risk. Even your own little friends. Do you honestly believe you survived all of those years due to your own merit? I spent every waking hour protecting you, and you didn’t even have the decency to follow basic school rules or, Merlin-forbid, give me an ounce of respect as your teacher, much less the person who was enduring constant torture on your behalf.”

Harry had learned a lot about Snape from his memories, and he knew the man had protected him, but not to this extent. This was a new and painful revelation, and it made him sick. “I had no idea…honestly. And believe me, I know I didn’t stay alive because of my own merit…I know.  And I should have given you more respect, although if you remember, you weren’t exactly kind to me. But yes, you’re right, I was reckless and irresponsible…I was a stupid kid making terrible choices because I didn’t have a single adult I could trust or depend on. And now I realize that, now I understand that. And I’m sorry— truly sorry for every bit of pain you endured on my behalf.”

“Don’t try to placate me, Potter. Aside from your father, you are one of the most uppity and foolhardy students I have ever come across in all of my years at Hogwarts. It’s only a shame you didn’t end up in Slytherin, where I might have had a chance to curtail some of your recklessness.”

Harry paused, shaken. “I nearly did…the hat wanted to put me there, you know.”

“Nonsense.”  Snape cleaned up his bench, stoppering bottles and floating them to their rightful places.

“I’m serious. I begged it not to, so it put me in Gryffindor, but it wanted to sort me in Slytherin.”

Snape paused and raised an eyebrow in surprise. “What a shame. I would have enjoyed putting you in your place, Potter.  What a disservice the hat did, giving in to your pleas. Had you been in Slytherin, you would have had to answer to me. And I can assure you, after a good slippering or two, you would have thought twice before engaging in some of the absurd shenanigans you got up to.”

“I thought those were rumors,” Harry said, with disbelief. “Did you really smack the Slytherins?”

“I ran a tight ship, Mr. Potter. I might not have taken points, but I can assure you every single transgression was dealt with in house. Soundly. My Slytherins knew better than to flout the rules without knowing they’d be given their rightful comeuppance.”

Harry sat back, the realization hitting him. “No way. So that's why you never took points from the Slytherins? I always thought you were showing favoritism.”

“Hardly, Mr. Potter. I just found that my own punishments were far more effective.”

After a few seconds, a smirk passed by Harry’s lips. “Does that mean you spanked Draco? Fucking brilliant.” Harry was imagining his arch nemesis getting smacked like a kindergartener, and even after all of these years, he couldn’t help but feel immense schadenfreude. 

“That’s absolutely none of your business, Potter, don’t be childish.”

“Oh please, you want me to believe in 7 years, Draco never did anything to warrant smacking? No way. He was such a tosser back then. I really hope you gave it to him good, he definitely deserved it.”

“Careful, Potter. Need I remind you that you nearly killed Draco, or have you forgotten? Had you been in my own house, you would have been caned. A punishment reserved for only the most egregious offenses. I still cannot believe that you got off so lightly for attempted murder, it remains to this day one of the worst things I’ve ever witnessed as a teacher.” 

Harry went white as a sheet. “I never meant that to happen…I had no idea what that spell did, but if I had, I would have never used it. Think what you want of me, but I’m not a violent person. Even if I hated Draco, I would have never intentionally harmed him to that extent. Never.”

“Once again, you were incredibly lucky I was there to save him, and you. If it hadn’t been for me, you would have been a murderer before you even came of age. Even your father didn’t manage to add that to his impressive school record, despite his best efforts.”

Harry felt his emotions swell, Snape had hit him in two of his most sensitive spots. He stood up with his hands clenched at his sides and began to shout. “If you remember, that was YOUR spell, you psychopath! At least my father didn’t go around creating spells capable of killing people! And I didn’t do it on purpose! Draco tried to kill me first! Where were you for that!”

Snape didn’t back away, he stepped forward, towering above Harry at his full height. “You were the one so arrogant you dared to cast a spell without even knowing what it did. I was never so irresponsible, not even as a 12 year-old. Now sit down, Potter, and get control of yourself before you have an aneurism.”

Harry took several deep breaths, a sick feeling washing over him as he remembered that horrifying day in the girl’s toilet, blood everywhere, Draco gasping for breath, fear in his eyes as death hovered over him. Even if he’d hated the man, Snape had been his savior that day. A single minute more and he’d have been living with the weight of killing a classmate for the rest of his life, one he was sure he could never have managed. ”Fuck!” he screamed, ”I didn’t mean it!” before collapsing into sobs, an unexpected panic attack threatening to overtake him.

”Calm yourself, Potter,” Snape said harshly, recognizing that he was beginning to hyperventilate. He grabbed Harry by both arms. ”Breathe. Right now.” He could feel the young wizard collapsing slightly but he held him firmly.


Harry needed the grounding, and the feel of Snape’s hands gripped tightly around his biceps, his harsh voice, his commands, helped him come back into his body. He gasped for air. “I’m sorry!” he cried out.


“Enough, Potter. It’s over.” Snape gave him a small shake before staring him in the eyes and letting him go.

Harry took a moment and stilled himself, breathing in silence for a moment before he spoke. “You’re right. I was stupid and arrogant, and I should have never cast that....and I’m glad you were there to save him. And me. When I saw what I did, it terrified me. I hated myself. You have no idea how sorry I am for that. I regret it. Deeply.”

“As you should. I begged Dumbledore to punish you properly, but of course he refused.”

Harry’s emotions were overwhelming him now, despite the fact he was 25 years old, he still had nightmares about that day, and the guilt had never fully left him. “I know, and I wish he had…I still beat myself up about it.”

Snape was curious seeing this grown version of Harry Potter admit to these feelings, he could see the true remorse in his face and it was satisfying. Yet at the same time, he was feeling something else. It was clear Harry was still filled with so much unresolved pain, and for the first time Snape felt…empathy. 

“I’m glad you recognize the severity of your actions, Potter. But as you said, you were a child. Reckless, arrogant, and over-emotional, but a child nonetheless. It’s time to let that go now.”

Harry collapsed on the stool, putting his hands in his face and rubbing his forehead. “Why didn’t he punish me?”

Snape scoffed. “Dumbledore could never. I offered my services to deal with you the way I felt you deserved and he was too concerned that it would break your spirit, harm your ability to do your job. You were an asset, not a boy. You know that by now, don’t you?”

“Yeah, I do.”

“That’s not to say he didn’t care for you, but he had a purpose for you. And no one was allowed to interfere with his Golden Boy. Not even when he desperately needed it.”

Snape wanted to feel smug. Isn’t this what he always wanted? Harry Potter admitting to all of his faults, crying, apologizing and being repentant. But there was something about this conversation that was hitting him on a deeper level, and it was almost…healing. To hash through these old wounds and resentments with an adult Harry Potter, who despite what Snape might say, seemed mature and rational, and even apologetic, was affecting him far more than he wanted to admit.

“So if he’d let you, you’d have caned me?” Harry said, his head still in his hands.

Snape raised an eyebrow. “Without a moment of hesitation Potter. And I’m certain you’d have been far better off for it.”  

“I was in a really bad place that year and I wish someone had really cared enough to do something, to intervene. To take some of that burden from me. I was still a kid, but I was dealing with all of these adult problems, but I didn’t have a single adult who was willing to treat me like I was a normal teenager. Everyone treated me like I was made of glass, but instead of making me feel loved and protected, it made me feel lonely. Isolated. Different. I was angry and lashing out and desperate for some boundaries, for someone to be there for me as a person, not just The Boy Who Lived.”

For the first time, Snape felt bad, truly bad for adult Harry. He put a hand on his shoulder. “In many ways, we failed you Potter. I should have advocated more for you...I fought with Albus constantly about this, but I should have done more. You deserved better. From everyone…including me.” It was the closest he’d ever get to apologizing to Harry, and they both knew it. 

To his dismay, Harry choked out a sob, Snape’s tenderness being so unexpected it opened the emotional floodgates. “Fuck, I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

Snape stared for a minute before he spoke. “Because it wasn’t fair. Ever. You were robbed of a normal childhood, of love, of support. Even for the people who cared for you, you were a means to an end, not a full person. No one worried about the potential damage they were doing to you because no one believed you’d ever survive…Yet here you are.” 

Harry wiped his face, “Now that I’m about to have my own child, I can’t even imagine putting a poor kid through everything I’ve been through. All of the people who said they loved me, but they didn’t show it. Not really.”  Harry didn’t know why he was pouring his heart out to Snape like this, but somehow he felt that he was one of the only people who would truly understand. 

Reaching into his inside pocket, Snape pulled out one of the endless supply of handkerchiefs he kept there and handed it to Harry.  “Understandable. Being a parent…changes things. As a father now, I see things differently. There is something about having your own child that makes you keenly aware of all of the ways you were failed in your own childhood. You have every right to be angry and hurt for what was done to you. It is inexcusable. All of it. And all you can do now is work through your own pain and make sure you do better for your own child.”


“Yeah.” Harry wiped at his face with the handkerchief. 

“On the upside, the bar is so low, it is practically below ground. Even you can’t muck this up, Potter.”

Harry laughed through his tears. “True.”

Snape had no idea where these words were coming from, how dramatically his feelings had changed over the course of this conversation. But something deep within him was compelling him. As much as he loathed it, he and Harry had more in common than either of them would like to admit. They had both been pawns in a game they didn’t choose to play, although Harry far more so. Snape could at least partially blame himself for ending up in the position he’d been in. But he was seeing Harry as a whole person now in a way he had never fully allowed himself to before, and he found himself craving the reconciliation. 

Harry wiped at his tears. “Yeah…sorry, I’m not sure where all of this is coming from. I never talk about my feelings, I certainly never thought I’d be trauma dumping on you, of all people.”

“And I never thought in a million years I’d be begging Harry Potter to help me keep custody of my son. It appears we’ll both have to get over it.” 

Harry had a new respect for the man, and a new resolve to help him. “I’m going to figure something out. I promise. I’ll buy you some more time, no matter what I have to do. Do you really think you can find a workaround for the potion?”

“Potter, please, don’t insult me. Do you honestly know anyone alive today whom you believe is more proficient than me when it comes to potions? I highly doubt it. If I can’t find a solution, there isn’t one. But we’ll cross that bridge if we get to it. Right now I have some new ideas to try out, and plenty to work on.

Harry was impressed with the man’s confidence. He wiped his eyes once more and blew his nose before casting a cleaning spell on the handkerchief and offering it back to Snape. 

“Keep it, Potter. I’ve got more than enough.” He’d considered a snide remark about disgusting Potter germs that no cleaning spell in the world could ever rid him of, but for once, he didn’t feel like being unkind. 

“Thanks.”

“You are under no obligation, but I know Soren would like to see you and show you his classroom. Ms. Cloutier is also eagerly awaiting an introduction. That is, if it won’t inconvenience you too much, I know you’re a very busy and important man.” 

Harry smiled. “I’d love to.”

When Snape appeared with Harry in the doorway to the classroom, Soren was sitting at his desk practicing his letters and using a quill while Marie stood at the board with a piece of chalk, showing him the strokes of the letter E. 

As soon as Soren realized they were there, he jumped out of his chair to go greet Harry. 

Snape clicked loudly. “Get back to your seat. You do not jump up in the middle of class. Finish what you are doing and then when Ms. Cloutier gives you permission, you may come say hello.”

Harry had to stifle a grin, Snape was so predictably Snape-like, even now. Poor Soren would never get away with a thing. 

“Why don’t you write 10 more letter E’s, Soren, and then you can take a break,” Ms. Cloutier said, setting down the chalk and making her way to the back of the classroom. 

“Mr. Potter, this is our governess, Ms. Marie Cloutier. She is a graduate of Beauxbatons and has several advanced degrees in education, both from muggle and magical institutions. Ms. Cloutier, this is Mr. Harry Potter, whom I’m sure needs no introduction.”

Despite his less than enthusiastic tone, Harry was amazed Snape hadn’t used that opportunity to say something snarky. He held out his hand. “It’s nice to finally meet you, Soren has told me a lot about you, he just adores you.”

Marie smiled, shaking his hand. “That’s so kind. He’s an wonderful little boy. He is quite a fan of yours as well, as you can see. He’s been so excited all day he could barely sit still.”

Snape scowled. “I hope he wasn’t causing trouble, Ms. Cloutier, he knows how he is supposed to behave in class.”

Marie felt bad, she hadn’t meant to say anything that would get him in trouble, he was just excited and a bit hyper, asking every 20 minutes if Harry was still coming, when he was going to be here, can he show him this, that, and the other. “Oh no, Lord Kent, nothing like that. I could just tell he was looking forward to seeing Mr. Potter.”

“You can call me Harry. Really. I’d prefer it, actually. Mr. Potter makes me think I’m about to get detention,” he joked. 

There was nothing Snape could say to that, they were both adults, and in fact Marie was several years his senior. 

“Feel free to call me Marie,” she replied. She’d asked Lord Kent several times to call her by her first name, but he absolutely refused and she’d given up trying. Although now she kind of liked the formality, there was something old school about it that she enjoyed, it reminded her of the characters in her Jane Austen novels.  

Just then, Soren turned around, looking disappointed and sad he was stuck at his desk writing when everyone else was laughing and smiling and enjoying themselves. 

Snape glared at him and moved his finger in a circle to indicate he should turn back around, and he did, sighing loudly. He still had 4 more E’s to write. 

“Can I show you around the classroom?” Marie asked. 

“Yeah, sure. That’d be great.”

Marie took him to the reading corner and then walked him through some of the other stations she’d set up where they did their various interactive work. When she showed him the baking station, he was pretty impressed. 

“Wow, this is amazing. I used to hate doing maths at school, it was so boring. I would have loved this. What a clever way to teach fractions,” Harry said, holding up the measuring cups. 

“I take a lot of my methods from Montessori, it’s a muggle style of education, have you ever heard of it?”

“No, never. I grew up with muggles, but I just went to our little primary school down the road. Nothing fancy. 30 kids in a classroom and a bunch of worksheets and an exasperated, overworked, underpaid teacher.”

Marie smiled. “I had a similar experience in elementary school, but it’s really great for kids to learn by doing. To learn concepts in a practical way. Math can be a difficult thing to teach because people think they’ll never use it, but really we use it all the time. So, by following a recipe and using different measurements, Soren gets to practice adding and subtracting, following directions, understanding units of measurement and getting a feel for the math in a real world scenario. It’s definitely a lot more fun and it also creates a far greater understanding of numbers that helps make math more intuitive. There’s some great studies on this.”

Snape kept silent, but he could see Harry was impressed and he was proud of having Marie as his governess. She was bright and articulate, and even if he still wasn’t fully sold on her way of doing things, he could respect that she knew what she was doing.

Just then, Soren put his quill down and turned toward them, raising his hand. 

Marie looked up. “Yes, Soren? Are you finished?”

He nodded, “Can I get up from my seat now?”

“May you,” Snape corrected, sternly.  “Please.”

Soren tried again. “May I please get up from my seat now, I finished my letters.” 

“Of course, Soren. Do you want to show Mr. Potter the rest of the way around the classroom?”

Soren’s face lit up and he walked as fast as he could without running over to Harry, grabbing his hand. “Do you want me to show you my bank? When I save up enough of my classroom money, I can trade it in for a color-changing quill. Isn’t that cool?”

“Very cool,” Harry said, taking the boy’s hand as he dragged him around the classroom, showing him his favorite books, and how they practiced shopping and baking. Then he dumped out all of his coins and counted them out for Harry, proud to show off his skills, not just for Harry, but for his father as well who looked on with quiet approval.

“That’s really impressive, Soren. Great job!” Harry said enthusiastically putting his hand out for a high five. 

Soren gave him a high five, beaming with pride. “Do you want to see my new room? Oh, and thanks for putting out the fire. My room was all destroyed so my father and Ms. Cloutier fixed it and it’s super nice now. I have my own bookshelf and a reading chair and everything!”

“I’m sure Mr. Potter has better things to do, Soren, he was being polite by coming to see you, he no doubt has plenty of other work he needs to take care of.”

“Please? Just for a minute?” Soren whined, clearly disappointed, pulling on Harry’s hand. 

Snape was about to scold Soren for whining, but before he could, Harry spoke up.

“Sure, I’ve got some time. I don’t actually need to rush back to the Ministry just yet. Why don’t you show me your room, Soren.” Harry took the boy's hand and allowed himself to be dragged across the hallway. 

“Harry seems really lovely,” Marie said. “He’s way more humble and down to earth than I expected. And he’s so sweet with Soren.”

Snape had to control himself from rolling his eyes. “Yes, humble is certainly one of the first words that comes to mind when I think of him. A true paragon of modesty.”

Marie looked over at him. “I can’t actually tell if you mean that or you’re being sarcastic, Lord Kent. But I think Harry’s pretty great, and I hope we’ll see more of him here.”

“I have no doubt we will,” he said, as he exited the classroom, leaving her question unanswered. 

After Soren showed off his room, at Marie’s insistence, the four of them had tea in the parlor as Snape sat quietly in his armchair, participating as little as possible. 

His mind was reeling, both with concerns about Soren, but also because his conversation with Harry had unsettled him, opening old wounds and forcing him to unpack feelings he’d boxed away years ago. 

He thought about some of his own words, about how becoming a parent had made him see his childhood wounds in a new way, making the wrongs that were done to him somehow even more unforgivable. Which somehow made his current predicament all the more painful. No matter what way he looked at it, he worried he would cause Soren permanent emotional damage, and if he didn’t figure out a way around the Ministry, he was doomed to decide which was the lesser of two evils. 

“Thanks so much for having tea with us, Harry, I hope you’ll come back soon!” Marie said enthusiastically.

Snape was once again forced out of his deep thoughts and back to the present. 

“When are you coming back, Mr. Potter? Next time can we go outside? I want to show you the back garden and the maze, it’s really fun, isn’t it Ms. Cloutier?” Soren said, excitedly. 

“Mr. Potter is not your playmate, he is a busy official of the Ministry. Now stop pestering him.” Snape scolded him. He was going to have to give him a talk about not bringing up that damn maze every time.

Harry smiled. “I’m sure I’ll see you soon, and you can show me everything in the back gardens. Now I’m afraid I must go, thank you for the tea and the interesting conversation. I’m quite excited to learn more about your plans for building a school, Marie, and when the time comes, if I can help in any way, please let me know.”

“Thanks, Harry, that’s so generous. I’m a long way from starting it, but it’s definitely my big goal, so fingers crossed one day it will happen.”

“I’m sure it will.”

Harry stood up, and Marie gave him a quick hug, and Soren followed suit. 

Not wanting to be rude, Snape stood from his armchair and walked toward the fireplace. “We’ll be in touch. Keep me updated so I know what to expect.”

“Of course. But you can count on me, I promise.”

Snape hoped it was true. Harry had his flaws, but Snape knew that when he gave his word, he meant it. It was part of his whole Gryffindor valor. And as nauseating as Snape found the whole idea of it, in this case he hoped it was true.

“Take care, Mr. Potter,” Snape said, as he brought down his bowl of floo powder, offering it to him. 

“Take care,” Harry said, taking a handful of floo powder, taking a moment to look his former professor in the eyes before giving him a small smile. It wasn’t a cocky smile, or a fake one, but a gesture of understanding and good will. A “thank you” and “I’m glad we talked” and “I appreciate you” all in one. 

Snape gave him the briefest nod in return, and at that moment, a bridge was mended between them. 

Once Soren was in bed, Marie prepared herself for her first nightly check-in with Lord Kent. It had been an odd day. The day had started out brilliantly, and she’d enjoyed the time she spent with him walking in the morning, but for the rest of the day he seemed so…distant. Cold. 

She was sure it didn’t have anything to do with her, and if she had to guess, it was probably related to whatever business he was attending to with Harry. Nonetheless, she felt disappointed. He’d barely spoken a word to her at lunch or dinner, and every minute outside of meals and the time they’d spent with Harry, he’d been holed away in his lab or his study, only appearing in the dining room at the last possible minute, and leaving the second he finished the meager portion he’d put on his plate.

She knocked on his door and heard the familiar “Enter” which immediately caused her stomach to clench. There was something about the anticipation of seeing him, and hearing his commanding voice that gave her a thrill. 

“Come, sit,” he said, his face unreadable. He wasn’t angry or upset, she was pretty sure, but neither did he have that twinkle in his eye that she knew meant he was enjoying her presence. 

Marie sat on the edge of her chair, looking across the desk at him. There were lines etched in his forehead, and his face was tense.

“I won’t keep you long. Do you have your checklist with you?” He asked, putting his hand out, getting straight to business.

“Oh, yes, of course.” She stood up and handed it over to him, but he refused her eye contact, instead staring down at the journal. 

“Sit.” He said, keeping his eyes on the paper. 

She immediately sat back down, waiting in hopeful anticipation for his response.

“It appears everything is checked-off. Do you have any thoughts on your day? Anything that was challenging?”

“Oh, um, not really. I enjoyed our walk this morning, it definitely gave me some extra energy, although I found I needed to rest a bit after lunch.”

He looked up. “And did you?”

“Yes, I actually slept for 20 minutes or so.”

“Good.”

“Otherwise, I feel pretty good about everything. Do you have any feedback for me?” She was desperately trying to engage him, but he was like stone, and she knew she shouldn’t let it affect her so much, but she couldn’t help it. It felt like rejection.

“Other than your minor episode of cheek this morning, it appears you’ve done well. I don’t think there’s much more for me to say.”

Marie had to swallow back tears. Why was he being so cold? She’d expected a bit of praise, some encouragement. Something.  “Is everything alright, Lord Kent? You seem, not like yourself.”

He finally looked up at her, tossing her journal across the desk until it landed in front of her. “Everything is fine, Ms. Cloutier. You may be dismissed.” He picked up a quill and put his attention back on whatever it was he’d working on before she got there. 

Was that it? No banter, no scolding, no reminder to go to bed on time, or to wear warm clothes tomorrow. Nothing. She sat for a moment in stunned silence before he looked up, irritated. “Are you waiting for me to roll out a red carpet? Surely you know your way to the door by now. You may leave,” he said curtly. 

“Sorry, Lord Kent.” Tears were burning in her eyes now and she got up to leave quickly before the dam broke and she couldn’t control it. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight,” he replied flatly, not looking up. 

As soon as she closed the door behind her, hot tears began to run down her cheeks. What the fuck Marie? It’s not that big of a deal, get it together! But no matter what she said to herself, the tears still came, and her deep disappointment was inconsolable. 

She went straight to her room and cried in bed, fully neglecting her nightly routine. She didn’t brush her teeth, or do her skincare routine, or write in her journal, or even bother to change out of her clothes. Nor did she remember to set her alarm for the next day. Instead she threw her journal across the room and cried herself to sleep, alternating between self-pity, disappointment, confusion, and anger. 

Chapter Text

Marie slept hard for nearly ten hours before she was roused by a loud knock on her door. Groggy, she grabbed her clock to check the time and panicked, it was already a quarter past 7. Shit. She shot up quickly, snatching Soren’s wand from her side table as she rushed to the door.                     

“Hi!” she said, attempting to sound awake even though her voice was still coated in sleep. It wasn’t exactly the vibe she was going for— she hadn’t meant to sound so cheery— but she’d clearly overshot the amount of energy she needed to feign wakefulness on 20 seconds of notice.

Snape stood with his arms crossed, his face obviously displeased. “You should be up and doing your morning routine by now. Yesterday was just a courtesy, you’re supposed to be managing your schedule on your own, I am not your personal alarm clock.” He scowled at her before glancing down and realizing she was still in yesterday's attire, albeit far more wrinkled. “Did you sleep in your clothes?”

Marie blushed as she ran her hand over the creased fabric of her shirt in vain. “I was exhausted last night, I fell asleep before I could finish getting ready for bed.”

He raised a disappointed eyebrow before softening his face and looking her over carefully for any signs of illness, concern flashing in his eyes. “Are you…unwell?”

“No, just worn out I guess.” She pushed a stray piece of hair from her face, was trying not to engage too much, refusing to make eye-contact, even though she felt loads better after a long night of deep sleep. Even though he was being perfectly reasonable with her, she was still kind of annoyed with him and she wanted him to recognize that she was giving him the cold shoulder.

“Well, you obviously needed the rest. But don’t make this a habit.” He tapped his wrist with urgency. “It’s not too late to do a few minutes of meditation or yoga, in fact I’d highly encourage you to get back on track this morning.”

What? No scolding, nothing? Marie grew even angrier that he didn’t care enough to even say much about it. He’d completely dismissed her. “I’m going to take a walk,” she said, hoping he’d invite himself along so she could tell him she wanted to be alone. 

“If you like…just be back in time to wake Soren for breakfast.”

“I’ll be fine,” she said, dismissing him, reaching for the door to close it.

“Very well,” he said, before turning to head to the stairs.

Marie pressed the door closed with vigor. She was fuming now, how dare he dismiss her like that!! She cleaned herself up and purposely neglected to bring a sweater or put on her warm robes. Maybe if she walked out the door dressed like this, he’d at least say something in warning. He’d made such a big fuss about her clothes yesterday, there must be something he has to say about it today. 

She hurried down the stairs, passing him in the parlor where he was sipping his tea and reading. He didn’t move a single muscle as she approached, clearly too engaged in whatever he was doing.

“I’m going out,” Marie announced loudly.

“So you’ve said,” he replied flatly, glancing up briefly before returning his focus to the pile of notes in his hand.

Marie paused another few seconds, waiting for him to mention her lack of heavy robes, or the fact she didn’t even have a warm sweater, but he didn’t look up again. She stormed toward the back door, closing it quite heavily behind her. Bastard. 

As soon as the freezing air hit her face, she immediately regretted her decision. It was far foggier this morning and the moisture mixed with an icy north wind chilled her to the bone. Within 3 minutes, her teeth were chattering and she’d had to cast several warming spells before realizing it was futile, it was far too cold. 

As much as she wanted her stubbornness to win out, she had no desire to die from hypothermia, so she prioritized her comfort and before she could even make it a third of the way around the loop, she turned back around, cursing herself, but cursing him more. Asshole. He doesn’t care at all, he’s so self-absorbed. UGH, I hate him! In a movement of pure petulance, she ripped a dead branch off of one of the bushes before throwing it as far as she could to the side, needing a release for her anger.

She stomped loudly back through the door and was surprised that when she passed back through the parlor, Lord Kent was nowhere to be seen, so she didn’t even have the benefit of letting him see her all frozen, lips blue, and violently shivering. Which only served to stoke her rage.

Once she made it back to her room, she took a hot shower and quickly put herself together so she could wake Soren and get him ready for breakfast. Even though she’d managed to work herself up quite a bit, the warm shower had relaxed her and as soon as she saw Soren’s smiling face, her foul mood seemed to life temporarily.

Breakfast was a somber affair, Marie was actively ignoring Lord Kent and spent breakfast picking at her plate, hoping he’d comment on the fact she was barely eating. But he didn’t. In fact, he only had half a piece of toast before he excused himself to attend to work he had in the lab. Marie fumed to herself, but did her best to keep a smile on her face while Soren talked animatedly about his favorite new Curious George book in between sips of milk and bites of sausage.

The morning in the classroom actually did a lot to boost Marie’s mood. Soren was so vibrant and engaging, she’d forgotten everything else until they once again returned to the dining room for lunch. 

Snape breezed in at the last minute, and once again, said very little before excusing himself back to the dungeons where he was clearly in the middle of something important. He’d barely looked at her all day, and if he noticed that she was ignoring him, he made no mention of it.

Marie was pissed. She’d purposely put very little on her plate and had refused to take a single bite, but he hadn’t even noticed. Her stomach growled, but she ignored it, her resolve greater than her hunger. She thought about that Kate Moss quote: Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels . It was toxic, of course, but she was trying to channel a similar feeling. Nothing tastes as good as anger feels. She was determined to be on a hunger strike until he acknowledged her. It was immature, of course, but now she was committed. She didn’t care what she had to do, she would get his attention. 

This went on through dinner, and again, Lord Kent said nothing, seemingly oblivious to her and what she was (and wasn’t eating), and even after dinner, he disappeared to the dungeons, leaving Marie ready to scream.

At their 8 o’clock meeting, he was equally dismissive, encouraging her to take more rest, sliding her journal back to her without a single admonition despite the fact she’d completely buggered her evening routine the night before and been late in the morning. 

“Are you giving me a black mark?” She asked, prompting him. 

“I hardly think falling asleep early because you were exhausted would be in the spirit of the self-improvement plan, Ms. Cloutier. There will be no gold-stars, but no black marks, either. Try not to let it happen again. You’re dismissed.”

Instead of crying herself to sleep, Marie couldn’t sleep at all. She laid awake for hours, tossing and turning and trying to avoid all of the anxious thoughts that kept popping up against her will. At sometime around 4 or 4:30am, she finally fell asleep, but it was far from restorative.

When she woke up again at 5:30am, she just laid there, thinking about her life and her future, most of her anger from the day before having morphed into self-pity. At some point around 6, she dragged herself up and slowly got ready, not even having the energy to be stubborn. She was already feeling a little chilled so she wrapped herself in warm robes, put an extra scarf around her neck and headed downstairs before the sun was even fully up.

The parlor was empty when she passed through it, but the fire was blazing in the hearth, it was clear someone had tended to it earlier this morning, though she had no idea if it had been Tinny or Lord Kent. Marie pushed out the back door, disappointed to not even catch a glimpse of the man this morning, even if it was only so she could do her best to ignore him.

She ended up doing three full loops on the path, lost deep in thought before she caught his imposing figure standing in front of the back steps, arms crossed, clearly waiting for her. 

“What do you think you’re doing, Ms. Cloutier? You’ve been out here for more than an hour. Are you trying to exhaust yourself before you even start your day?”

Marie refused to engage with him, although she felt a slight boost from seeing him looking so perturbed.  She walked up the steps past him, not stopping to look at him as she spoke. “Not really. I’m perfectly capable of walking for an hour without exhausting myself. Maybe that would tire some people, but I’m in perfectly good health.” She nearly included “someone your age” but she decided to stay civil.

Snape gritted his teeth but said nothing else to her as she made her way inside and up the main staircase. 

Marie felt smug, triumphant that at last she’d managed to get some kind of rise out of him, but as soon as that thought crossed her mind, her vision started to get blurry and dark and she had to stop and grab the bannister to keep from passing out. Fuck. Take a breath. She paused in the middle of the stairs, the lights flashing behind her eyes as she struggled to stay upright.

When her vision came back, she took the remaining stairs extremely slowly, her heart racing and the panic of nearly fainting causing her hands to shake. She glanced behind her to see if Lord Kent had noticed, but he was nowhere in sight.

At breakfast she knew she should eat something, but now she had no appetite. She took several sips of water, and attempted to eat a bite of eggs before nearly gagging on them and setting her fork down. This time it wasn’t her stubbornness, she really just didn’t feel like eating.

“Is everything alright, Ms. Cloutier,” Snape asked, with a look of true concern. “You seem...ashen. Are the eggs not to your liking?”

“I’m fine,” she replied, forcing a smile. “I woke up early this morning and had a snack before I went out.” You liar! What was the point of that? OMG, stop it!!

He stared at her. “You don’t seem like yourself.”

“I didn’t sleep well, that’s all. I’ll be fine. This morning’s walk invigorated me.”

Snape scowled but said nothing else. 

“We’re going to learn about planets this week, aren’t we Ms. Cloutier!” Soren was excited, bouncing slightly in his seat as he shoved in bites of egg and beans on toast. “And we’re going to learn all about the stars!”

“Don’t speak with your mouth full,” Snape scolded half-heartedly, his attention turning momentarily from Marie. He pointed at the boy’s chair and scowled. “Sit down properly, and finish your bite before you open your mouth, you’re not at a trough.”

Soren was unaffected by the scold, but he sat down, swallowed his bite and continued. “I love watching the stars on my ceiling, I can’t wait to learn all about the solar system. Father, did you know that some planets have more than one moon? That’s what Ms. Cloutier said. Wouldn’t it be funny if we had five moons instead of one?”

Snape took a sip of his tea, still staring at Mary with concern before replying to Soren. “Indeed.”

Marie could feel his eyes on her. Good. It’s about time. But she refused to indulge him and instead smiled at Soren. “We’re going to learn all about them, and build a model of the solar system to scale, that will be quite fun, won’t it?”

“Yeah! I can’t wait!” Soren said. “Father, can wizards apparate to the moon?”

Snape paused for a minute in contemplation, it was actually an incredibly interesting question. “Theoretically, I suppose it is possible. Although many people find it difficult to apparate to a place they’ve never been before. It would also to have to be a very powerful witch or wizard to go that kind of distance, and certainly it has never been done before. Most people can apparate a maximum of 5,000-10,000 miles without it completely draining their magic. For reference the moon is closer to 250,000 miles. Not to mention the challenges of apparating to a place with less gravity and no atmosphere. I’m sure Ms. Cloutier will explain all about that this week.”

“That’s really far. Is that more far away than Australia?” Soren asked, innocently. 

“It’s not even 10,000 miles to Australia from here,” Snape said matter-of-factly. “The moon is twenty-five times further.”

“Oh. Can you apparate to Australia then, father?”

Snape paused briefly with his teacup perched at his lips. “Yes. Although I would probably be inclined to rest afterward. I find apparating long distances to be…less than enjoyable.”

“That’s OK, Ms. Cloutier says you should always rest if you need to. I want to visit Australia. They have koalas and kangaroos. Koalas are my new favorite animal! Did you know their babies live in a pouch? When they first come out they are tiny like this” Soren showed how small with his thumb and forefinger barely apart.

“Charming,” Snape said, tapping the table in front of Soren. “Now finish your eggs.”

Marie’s plate sat untouched, but Snape knew it wasn’t within his purview to comment on what she was eating, although he was suitably worried. That being said, he had his own deadlines to attend to and as soon as he finished his tea and his toast, he excused himself. “Are you sure there’s nothing else Tinny can get for you, Ms. Cloutier?”

“I’m perfectly fine, thank you.”

He nodded and headed to the dungeon. “Very well, I will see you both at lunch.”

“Ms. Cloutier, did you ever go to Australia?” Soren asked, shoving a piece of toast dipped in beans into his mouth with his hands now that his father was gone from the table. 

“I haven’t actually, but that would be a fun trip, wouldn’t it?” She smiled at him as he continued on talking about his favorite animals.

They were a good two hours into their lesson when Marie started to feel extremely unwell.  Her head was pounding and she was sure she was getting a fever, and when she stood up from the reading nook, she didn’t even have time to brace herself before she felt her eyes go dark and she collapsed to the floor. 

“Ms. Cloutier!” Soren shouted dropping his book and pulling at her arm. “What’s wrong?!” He shouted at her once more with no response sprinting for the door.

Soran ran down the stairs as fast as he could, headed straight for the dungeons. He knew he wasn’t allowed there, but this was an emergency and he screamed out for his father.

“Father! Come quick!! It’s Ms. Cloutier, she fell!” He attempted to brace himself on the damp, slick wall of the winding staircase until his father came angrily up the steps to meet him, picking him up under one arm and carrying him like a sack of flour the rest of the way up.

When they got to the top of the dungeon steps, Snape closed the door harshly behind him and set Soren on his feet before bending down and grabbing both of his arms. “What are you shouting about? You know you’re not to ever come down there!”

“I know, but Ms. Cloutier fell! I can’t wake her up!!” Soren cried out in frustration.

“What? Where is she? In the classroom?” 

Soren nodded. 

Snape let go of the boy, stood, and rushed toward the classroom, Soren running behind him trying to keep up with his long, powerful strides.

When Snape arrived, Marie was sitting on the floor of the reading nook with her head between her knees. He rushed to her side and knelt down next to her with a hand on her back. “What happened, Ms. Cloutier? Are you injured? Soren said you fell.”

“I think I fainted,” she said, her head still between her knees. “I’m feeling light-headed, and nauseous. I don’t know if I can stand up without passing out again.”

Without a word, Snape scooped her up in his arms and stood. “That’s it, we’re putting you right back to bed.”

Marie didn’t fight it, instead burying her face into his chest, wrapping her arms around his neck. She could feel the heat pulsing off of him, and although she wasn’t a particularly petite girl, he made it seem effortless as he carried her out of the classroom. She wanted to breathe him in, but she was afraid she might get sick, so she closed her eyes and tried to commit this moment to memory. 

Soren was crying, the whole experience having given him an enormous fright. He trailed behind his father and Ms. Cloutier as they exited the classroom.

Snape looked over his shoulder. “Ms. Cloutier will be fine, Soren. Go to your room, I’ll be there shortly.”

“I want to go with Ms. Cloutier,” he said in between small sobs. 

“She’ll be fine. Now do as you're told,” Snape said over his shoulder as he took Marie to her room. When Soren continued to follow behind him, he paused and turned around, hardening his voice. “Go to your room, Soren, now . Don’t make me say it again.”

When Soren finally complied, Snape turned around and with an impressive display of wandless, wordless magic, he flung open the door to Marie’s room and took her to her bed, laying her down gently on top of the mattress. Once she was situated he stepped back and looked at her. “Well, explain yourself. What on earth happened?”

“I wasn’t feeling well, I got dizzy and I fainted.”

He reached out and put a hand on her head. “You feel warm, I’ll have Tinny fetch some potions. Is anything else hurting you?”

“My head a little. And my throat. And I’m still feeling quite dizzy and nauseous.”

He snapped for Tinny and gave him specific instructions to bring his medical kit, where he kept a collection of common healing potions.

Snape made his way to the end of her bed and removed her shoes. Once he’d set them gently on the floor, he attempted to get her situated under the blankets, fussing over her like a mother hen. “It’s no wonder you’ve taken ill, you’ve barely touched your food for the last two days, and like an arrogant fool you went gallivanting around in the gardens yesterday dressed completely inappropriately for the weather. And don’t get me started on your hour-long sojourn through the gardens this morning despite the fact you’d barely slept or eaten. One would think you were invoking the gods in an effort to be struck down with some kind of illness.”

Marie was too unwell to hear much of what he was saying, and far too weak to argue. But apparently he had noticed her efforts, not that it made her feel any better now, she was absolutely miserable.

“I don’t know what kind of games you're playing, Ms. Cloutier, but I do not find them entertaining in the least. What on earth were you thinking?” He stood up and put his hands on his hips, his irritation morphing into deep displeasure.

In her weakened, delirious state, she turned herself on her side, facing away from him and closing her eyes. “You were ignoring me.”

“I beg your pardon?” Snape was enraged now, but he continued to move around the bed, attempting to get her situated under the covers one limb at a time.“I did no such thing. It may shock you to find this out, Ms. Cloutier, but I have far more responsibilities weighing on me than just keeping tabs on you and your self-improvement plan. The idea is that you’re supposed to take responsibility for yourself, you don’t need me.”

“Yes, I do.” Marie was in a dream-like stupor at this point, her high fever, the fainting, and the lack of food meant she had no control over her senses whatsoever. “I just wanted you to be proud of me…but you obviously don’t care about me at all,” she mumbled, not realizing she’d said it out loud.

“Absolute rubbish. You’re a grown woman, and it is not my place to tell you what to eat or what to do. I was attempting to respect your autonomy. However, instead of encouraging you, it appears you were intent on throwing an elaborate tantrum, the result of which has caused you to faint in the classroom, leaving you completely incapacitated. You should be ashamed of yourself, Ms. Cloutier. Neglecting your self-care, making yourself ill, all because I refused to indulge you in your silly little games? This is the kind of ridiculous ploy I might expect from someone Soren’s age, but not yours. It’s pathetic.”

“Sorry,” Marie mumbled, into her pillow, barely hearing a word he said.

Snape moved around to the other side of the bed so he could roll her slightly, freeing the duvet from underneath her so he could finish tucking her in. He put one hand on her shoulder and another on her hip as he pulled her toward his chest. “Do you know what I told Soren when he tried the same nonsense with me? I let him know that if he ever dared to skip a meal in a bid for attention, he would go straight to my study where his backside would get the full attention of my slipper.” 

“That’s not nice,” Marie said, floating in space as his chest neared her face and she could smell him. “We just want you to look after us.”

“What do you think I’m doing?” Snape said as he rolled her back down, exasperation evident in his voice. He continued arranging the last of the bedsheets around her just as Tinny appeared with his medical kit. He stood up and put the charmed bag on the bedside table, digging through it aggressively until he found several of the potions he was looking for. He pulled out four different vials before turning back toward Marie. “I have far better uses of my time than playing doctor for a petulant governess who clearly didn’t get enough of Daddy’s attention as a child so now she’s throwing tantrums in a vain attempt to seek it elsewhere.”

Snape probably shouldn’t have said that, but he was sure Marie wouldn’t remember a thing later, she was quite unwell and clearly out of it. He let out a deep sigh. “I need you to sit up slightly so you can take these.”

Marie shook her head into her pillow, gripping the duvet and pulling it up further. “Don’t feel well. I want to sleep.”

“You don’t feel well because you made yourself sick acting like a spoiled brat. You wanted me to take care of you and that’s what I’m doing. I’m trying to help you feel better, now stop being obstinate and sit up.”

Marie rolled onto her back and attempted to push herself up, but she was far too weak and dropped back onto the pillow, all without ever opening her eyes.

When it was obvious she wasn’t going to be able to do it by herself, Snape put his hands under her arms and helped prop her up against the headboard. She collapsed like a rag doll, and eventually he sat on the edge of her bed so he could keep her steady by allowing her to lean on him, and one by one, he fed her the potions. One for fever, one for nausea, one for mild pain, and another for sleep and restoration—it was his goal to have her rest for the remainder of the day. When she was pressed against him, he could feel the intense heat from her fever radiating through even his thick wool clothes.

After setting down the other vials, he brought the last potion to her lips. When she refused to drink it, he softened his voice and coaxed her gently. “Open up, Ms. Cloutier, this is the last one. You’re nearly finished, and then you can rest.”

She pressed her lips together tightly and attempted to move her head away.

Using his hand to guide her face back around, he dropped his voice to an even lower tone. “Come on now, be a good girl, open your mouth.” He allowed his thumb to stroke her cheek softly. 

Together this had the intended effect and she slowly parted her lips, allowing him to pour in the contents of the final vial. “There we go. That’s it. Now rest.”  He helped her lay back down, before readjusting her blankets and tucking her in, resisting the urge to brush the hair from her face and place a chaste kiss on her forehead.

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled, a stray tear rolling down her face. “I didn’t mean to get sick.”

“Well you certainly weren’t doing yourself any favors when it came to preventing it. You wanted my attention, Ms. Cloutier, and now you have it. And if I had the authority to do so, you’d be going over my knee the second you were feeling better.”

At this point Marie was practically on another planet, everything felt so distant, she was completely dissociated. “I wouldn’t mind.”

Snape scoffed. “You’re delirious. And I can promise you, you would very much mind when you couldn’t sit down for two days. Now sleep. I’ll come back a bit later with some food, and don’t you dare try to refuse it. You’ve caused enough trouble with your stubborn behavior. ”

“OK,” Marie said, rolling over and falling into a deep sleep, his gentle scold only serving to warm her body from the inside as the potions took effect and she melted into the bed.

She wouldn’t remember most of that conversation, but Snape was going to have a hard time forgetting it. 

Snape tucked her in again before grabbing his medicine bag and heading to Soren’s room. He pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. He really did not have time for any of this. 

Unsurprisingly, he found Soren tearful on his bed, cuddling up with his rabbit. He heaved a deep sob when he saw his father. “I don’t want Ms. Cloutier to die!”

Oh for Merlin’s sake . Snape stood at the edge of Soren’s bed. “Ms. Cloutier is going to be just fine. She just has a slight fever, but I’ve given her some healing potions, and I’m sure she’ll feel much better after she gets some rest.”

“How do you know? My mummy got sick and she died,” Soren said, wailing. 

“I know, and I’m very sorry about what happened to your mother. But this is a very different situation. Your mother was sick with Dragon Pox, which is notoriously difficult to treat, even for the most experienced healers. And unfortunately, the spells and potions she attempted to use were too complex, which as you know resulted in a tragic outcome. Fortunately, Ms. Cloutier is at no such risk.”

“But you said you gave Ms. Cloutier potions, what if that makes her die too?” Soren cried even harder. 

“I made all of those potions myself, and I can assure you, no one is going to die as a result of my potions. Well, not unintentionally, anyway. I’m an extremely talented potions master. Ms. Cloutier will be just fine, she just needs some rest.” And a damn good spanking.

“You promise?” Soren said, resting his chin on top of his rabbit.

“I promise. You have my word no harm will come to Ms. Cloutier.” He pulled out a handkerchief. “Now that’s enough tears. Take a moment to tidy yourself up and we’ll have lunch.  I will do everything in my power to make sure Ms. Cloutier is well taken care of, so you don’t need to worry about that for another minute. Do you understand?”

Soren nodded his head and pressed his rabbit to his face. “I was so scared, father.”

“Yes, I’m sure you were. But you did the right thing coming to get me. Well done.”

“You shouted at me,” Soren complained, his lip jutting out in a small pout. 

“Yes, and I apologize. I couldn’t understand what you were saying and I thought you were playing around on the dungeon stairs. You do know you are never to step foot down there without permission, don’t you?” Snape eyed him cautiously.

“Yes, father, I know. It was only cuz Ms. Cloutier wouldn’t wake up.”

“I understand. Today was an emergency, but that’s the only exception. And in fact, I would prefer if in future you called for Tinny and he came to get me. It isn’t safe for you down there. Those stairs don’t even have a proper bannister, you could easily fall down them and break your neck, not to mention all of the potions and other dangerous items around downstairs.”

Soren nodded his head. “Yes, father.”

Snape gave him a few pats on the back. “Good boy. Now take a few breaths, wash your hands and face, and we’ll have lunch.”

After lunch and a nap, Snape sent Soren outside with Tinny to play in the gardens, and then he’d sat with the boy reading in the parlor for nearly an hour leading up to dinner. As he’d done with each meal, he’d had Tinny leave a tray of food, but so far all of it had remained untouched.

Snape was so screwed, even though he and Tinny had taken turns checking on Marie regularly, his concentration had gone out the window, and he hadn’t gotten a single thing done all day. He knew time was running out and it was frustrating to lose a whole day when he needed every spare moment he had.

After dinner, Snape helped get Soren ready for bed.

“Will you read to me father? I was really good today…..please???” Soren begged and the man relented. 

“Very well. Which book?”

Oliver Twist! Soren exclaimed, pulling it off of his miniature bookshelf and handing it to his father before he climbed into bed.

As soon as Snape grabbed the book, his face went into a deep scowl. “What happened to my book? This is not what it looked like when it left my library.” He stared down at Soren.

Soren’s face went bright red. “I accidentally spilled some water on it, father. From my drinking glass. I’m sorry. Ms. Cloutier tried to fix it. It was an accident.”

Snape was not pleased. “I thought I made it abundantly clear to Ms. Cloutier, but I will tell you as well. Taking books from the library is a privilege, but that means you are to take good care of them. If you’re going to be careless with them, you will lose the privilege to borrow them. One of you should have come to me when it happened so I could fix it. Look at these pages, they’re absolutely ruined. How extremely disappointing.” He let out a deep sigh.

“I’m sorry, father.” Soren knew it was his fault and he felt terrible. Not just about ruining the book, but because he also knew the truth, that it wasn’t because he’d spilled his water, he’d been playing with his wand and he was sick with guilt. “I promise I won’t let anything happen again.”

“You won’t get another chance, Soren. I mean it. I highly recommend taking better care of things people lend you if you want them to lend to you again.”

“I will.”

“Very well. Now where were you?” Snape didn’t have the energy to belabor the point. He’d add it to the list of things he was planning to discuss with Marie. She’d done a passable job trying to fix it, but he didn’t appreciate the fact she hadn’t come to him and been upfront about it. He was pretty sure if he’d known, he’d have been able to get it practically back to new. But now the delicate pages had been exposed to several different spells and he wasn’t sure if he could do much more without destroying them. That being said, he had far greater things to concern himself with.

“The policemen got Oliver, but then we stopped there.”

Snape flipped through the book until he found the right chapter. “Now get under the covers.”

“Ms. Cloutier always sits next to me when she reads,” Soren said hopefully, scooting over to leave space for his father to join him.

“Well, I am not Ms. Cloutier” Snape took one of the small chairs from Soren’s activity table and enlarged it, pulling it up to the side of the bed. With a swish of his wand, he dimmed the lights except for a small orb of light that hovered above the book.

“Wow! That’s neat!” Soren sat up and tried to reach out for the glowing ball of light to see if he could grab it. “What’s that!?”

Before he could touch it, Snape reacted in a flash, grabbing his wrist tightly and letting his wand come down with a quick thwack on the top of Soren’s hand. “What do you think you’re doing? You have no idea what the properties of that spell are. You have got to be more careful than that.” Snape scolded him harshly as he let go of his hand. “Isn’t Ms. Cloutier teaching you anything about safety and magic?”

Soren’s eyes teared up and he rubbed his hand where the wand had stung him, before tightening his grip on his rabbit, and curling back under the blanket, his feelings smarting far more than his hand. “Sorry.”

Snape watched the boy’s face fall and he immediately regretted reacting so harshly. The fact was, the spell was completely harmless, but it terrified him that his son didn’t have enough sense to be more careful around magic. His nerves had been on edge all day and he took a deep breath and softened his voice. “You should never touch things if you do not know they are safe. This is a globus luminus spell. This particular spell will not harm you, but that is not true for everything. There are other spells that could burn you or curse you. Do you understand?”

“Yes, father,” Soren whispered, his face still locked in disappointment, his round eyes filling with tears.

“Magic can be very dangerous, Soren, and you have got to learn to be extremely careful around it. If you are curious about something, you may ask me or Ms. Cloutier and we will explain it to you and let you know if it is safe. I don’t want to see you get hurt, ever.”

A few silent tears rolled down Soren’s face and he nodded. “I know.”

“Good.“ Snape reached over and put a single hand on his shoulder. “Now then, do you have your rabbit?”

Soren nodded, wiping another tear from his face. “Yes, father.”

“Alright, if you’re all ready, let’s begin.” Snape was making an effort to keep his voice calm and warm, but he was feeling terrible that Soren still looked so dejected from the small rebuke.

Snape read to him for a good fifteen minutes before Soren closed his eyes. He continued for another page or two until he heard the type of deep breathing he knew meant the boy was fully asleep. Quietly, he marked the page with a spell and replaced the book on his small bookshelf before extinguishing the orb of light and pulling the covers up around the sleeping boy. 

Although he was exhausted, he made his way across the hallway to check on Marie. Unsurprisingly, her tray remained untouched, but when he felt her forehead, she was finally much cooler. The second dose of the fever potion seemed to have done the trick. 

Snape picked up a throw pillow from beside her bed and transfigured it into a comfortable armchair, settling down into it while pulling out a stack of papers from his jacket. Over the next several minutes, he perused his notes, searching desperately for an answer to the paternity potion conundrum, but despite his best efforts to stay awake, he fell asleep in the chair, his notes on his lap.

Several hours later, he awoke with a start as Marie let out a deep, barking cough. He illuminated his wand and stood up to check on her. She was covered in sweat, her fever far worse than it had been earlier, and she was struggling to breathe. He could hear a slight wheeze, and he noticed she was using all of the accessory muscles of her neck and shoulders to try to take in air. 

“Ms. Cloutier, can you hear me? Can you sit up?” He lit a small lamp on her side table so he could see her more clearly.

She coughed violently again and then gasped for air, and Snape’s heart raced as he tried to prop her up slightly on her pillows. 

“Take slow deep breaths, Ms. Cloutier.”

Snape called for Tinny to bring him several more potions, and then he wet a flannel with cool water, pressing it to her forehead and her neck, attempting to cool her slightly and get rid of some of the sweat. When Tinny returned, he sat her up further, pouring several stronger potions down her throat. He wanted to help open her chest up with a salve, but she was far from being in her right frame of mind and he panicked that she would wake up and feel violated if he did so.

He left her propped her up on several pillows, hoping to open her airway a bit more by positioning her more favorably. She moaned a bit as he did, obviously uncomfortable. 

“Ms. Cloutier, I have a salve here that will help you breathe. May I put it on you? I will be gentle, but it will help open your lungs so you won’t struggle as much to bring in air.”

She didn’t respond, but he was worried that if he didn’t try something, her oxygen would drop quickly and he’d have no choice but to send for a healer, or—Merlin forbid—drag her to St. Mungos.

Gently he spread the cream on his fingertips before starting with the skin around her neck and her throat, gently massaging it in. It tingled underneath his hands as he smoothed it over the top part of her chest, staying on the exposed skin at the level of her shoulders and collarbones. It wasn’t ideal, but he was afraid to go any further down while she was clearly obtunded. 

Instead he leaned her forward slightly. “I’m going to put this on your back, that should help your breathing immensely.” With his wand, he opened the fabric of her shirt at the seam, baring her back completely, but ensuring that the front of her remained completely covered. He could see the retractions between her ribs even more clearly now and he felt terrible, she was far more sick than he’d first realized.

The skin of her back was a smooth alabaster, and his hands glided over her ribs as he massaged in the salve. But each time she coughed, he could feel the rales and rattles vibrate deep in her lungs, making it obvious that she’d developed pneumonia, and the potion she needed the most was something he didn’t have on hand. He could brew it in a matter of hours, but he was reluctant to leave her in the state she was currently in. He considered sending for a healer, but he feared that could make things messy. Of course if he had to, he would. He wouldn’t risk letting anything happen to her, but it would be highly inconvenient. He rolled his eyes at the realization that he’d probably have to get Potter to help him with the arrangements. But hopefully that wouldn’t be necessary…he was confident he had the knowledge and experience to heal her on his own.

He gave the potions and the salve a few minutes to kick in, and when her fever was down and her breathing improved, he ordered Tinny to keep close watch on her while he set off for the dungeons. 

In the potions lab, he brewed feverishly until nearly 6am before he finally had several vials of the purple potion he knew would help heal her. It would burn going down, but four or five doses of this should cure the infection in her lungs. 

Racing back upstairs, he found Marie sitting up slightly, her eyes barely open. “I’m thirsty,” she said, her voice raspy and weak. She coughed hard a few more times until she nearly gagged, her face turning red as she gasped for air. “I don’t feel well.”

“You’re quite ill, Ms. Cloutier. It appears to be pneumonia. I’ve brewed you a special potion that should help with the infection, and then we’ll get you some water.”

It took her another thirty seconds before she recovered her breath enough to sit up further. 

Snape cupped her chin gently and tilted her head back, pouring the purple potion down her throat. It burned going down and her eyes teared.  He stopped pouring and brought her head back to a neutral position just as two tears ran down her left cheek. Without thinking, he wiped them with his thumb.

“I know this potion isn’t pleasant, but it will help.” He reached for a glass of water on her tray. “Take small sips, I don’t want you to choke on it if you have another coughing fit.”

For several minutes, Snape cradled her head gently as he brought the glass to her lips, instructing her patiently to take small sips of water.

“I’m sorry,” she said, tears welling in her eyes as she stared up at him. 

“Hush. Right now the only thing you need to worry about is resting and healing.” He was using a soothing tone with her, not wanting to upset her and send her into fits of coughing. 

“Can you,” Marie said, attempting to look at something on the table that was now filled with vials of different potions. “More?”

“More what?” Snape asked. “You can have some of the anti-tussive in an hour, same with the pain potion.”

She shook her head. “No, that.” She attempted to lift her hand, but found she was too weak, so instead indicated with a tiny nod of her head.

Snape looked over at the table, then saw the container of salve, lifting it up to show her. “Do you want me to put more of this on you?”

She nodded, replying weakly “Yes.”

“On your back?”

Marie nodded. “Everywhere.” She attempted to unbutton her pajama top but fumbled for several seconds without success. 

Snape put his hand on hers. “Wait, Let me take care of it. Lie back and rest, I’ll do my best to protect your modesty.”

Marie leaned back on her pillows and closed her eyes, exhausted. Once again, Snape scooped the salve onto his fingertips and gently rubbed it along her neck and throat. Next he unbuttoned just her first two buttons and smoothed it along the top of her chest above and right under her collarbones. “May I go a little bit lower?” He asked gently and waited for her to nod before he slowly massaged the salve onto the left side of her chest, mindful to stay just above the swell of her breast, his smallest finger just millimeters from her areola. “Are you alright?”

Again Marie nodded. 

“Would you like me to stop?”

“No,” she whispered. 

He took another scoop, and without opening her shirt any further, rubbed it into the right side of her chest, moving his hand in small, slow circles, being careful to stay well above her nipple and the most sensitive parts of her body. He dipped his fingers again into the salve and this time smoothed his hand down the middle of her breastbone, lifting his hand so that only his middle and index finger slid further down, being careful to avoid her breasts on either side as he deftly passed over the skin between them. 

The relief was instant, and Marie took a deep breath, filling her lungs with air for what felt like the first time in hours. If she hadn’t been so sick, she might have found the entire situation intensely erotic; his hands were strong and his touch assured, but every movement was precise and incredibly careful, getting so close but never touching the most sensitive parts of her chest. In another context, it would have been a tease, driving her to the point of madness while she begged him to touch her. 

“I’m going to lift up your shirt a bit from the bottom and put some salve over the lower part of your ribs, are you alright with that, Ms. Cloutier?”

“Yes,” she said softly. She craved his touch, but also the relief of this magical ointment.  

Snape lowered the blankets just enough so he could lift the bottom of her shirt, unbuttoning the bottom three buttons so that her pajama top was now being held together by two buttons right across her fullest part of her bosom. If she hadn’t been so sick, he would have enjoyed it, and as much as he loathed himself for doing so, he filed every touch and every inch of her body away in his memory, knowing he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from replaying it again and again for his own pleasure.

Once again, he started on the left, massaging the salve around each rib, letting his hand reach around to the side, following the contour of her rib cage with his hand. He moved up slowly, carefully applying more while he did his best to avoid brushing the underside of her breast. As desperate as he was to touch her, he would only enjoy it when it came with her full consent, when she begged him for it. He focused intently to ensure he stayed within bounds, he wanted her to know she could trust him, that he would care for her and never take advantage of her. 

He didn’t linger, but he was slow and thorough, and when he was sure he’d covered every available inch on the left, he repeated the same movements on the right before reapplying the salve one last time as he smoothed it carefully up the middle, savoring her soft, warm skin and the feel of her heartbeat under his palm. When he was finished, he removed his hand and carefully re-did the buttons on her top. “Is that better?”

“Much,” she said. “My back?”

“Lean forward.” He positioned a pillow between her arms to hold to her chest and stomach as he gently guided her forward.

Like he did before, he split the pajamas down the seam in the back. “I’ll repair it when I’m through,” he said when she gasped slightly. 

He took his time and rubbing ointment into every inch of her back from her shoulders to an inch below the last rib, running his fingers along both sides of her spine, and then taking several minutes to massage her shoulders and the muscles in her upper back. “This salve should open up your lungs, but it will also help relax some of the intercostal muscles and the muscles in your back which you’ve been using to help breathe.”

“So good,” Marie said. His fingers felt like heaven, and she wished he’d never stop. She could have easily fallen asleep—the salve had relaxed her, along with some of the potions she was sure, but even in her weakened state she didn’t want to miss a single moment. His careful touch had caressed her as he massaged the ointment into her skin. She only wished she was well enough to enjoy it, the man’s hands were pure magic. “Thank you.”

Snape didn’t respond, and instead pulled out his wand and repaired the seam in her top before helping her to lay back down, although he was careful to leave her propped up at a slight angle to help with her breathing. 

Her face illuminated in the streaks of fresh sunlight that were now streaming into the room through her open curtains and for the first time, Snape could see the tiniest flecks of gold at the center of her blue-gray eyes.

“Your only job today is to rest. I’ll be in later to bring you more potions, but I want you to try to take in as many fluids as possible. Do you feel like you can eat something?”

Marie shook her head. “Not hungry.”

“Perhaps a little later today you’ll be able to tolerate some broth or soup. Otherwise, I expect you to follow my directions. To. The. Letter,” he emphasized. “You are to stay in bed, drink plenty of fluids, and if you need help to get to the loo, you will call for Tinny to assist you. I do not want you getting up by yourself, is that clear? The last thing we need is to add a head injury to this whole fiasco if, Merlin-forbid you pass out again.”

Snape was still using his calming voice, although he did throw in a bit of a scolding tone to drive home his message. “I mean it, Ms. Cloutier, this is not the time to flout the rules or ignore my instructions. I think you’ve quite exceeded your limit on being thoroughly disobedient with all of your infantile behavior this week, so there will be no more of that now, am I clear? It is dreadfully obvious that you are incapable of caring for yourself, but if you have any self-preservation whatsoever, you will listen to me and do exactly as you’re told.”

Marie had to fight a smile. He’d been doting on her for hours, but even in her weakened state, his words were having an effect on her. “Yes, sir.”

“Good. If nothing else, my goal is to see you get better so I can give you a thorough lesson on the importance of self-care and the dangers of attention-seeking.”

Marie’s ears burned red as he looked down at her with his most patronizing look. 

“At least you have the decency to look ashamed. In all of my years, I don’t think I’ve ever met a witch in more desperate need of some good old fashioned discipline, Ms. Cloutier.” He clicked his tongue and shook his head. “Now, are you going to behave or do I need to have Tinny stay here with you all day to ensure that you mind me?”

Marie was sure her face was about to burst into flames, but she just nodded her head. “I’ll behave.”

“Wouldn’t that be a pleasant surprise.” Snape flicked his wand at the curtains to darken the room. “Now get some rest. I’ll be back to check on you soon. If you need anything, call for Tinny. And I mean it, if you dare try to get out of bed on your own, I will charm a ruler to smack you the second your feet touch the floor. Don’t test me.”

“I won’t, I swear.”

“Hmmph.” Snape made a sound that indicated he didn’t quite believe her before sweeping dramatically out of the room.

As soon as he closed the door, Marie leaned back and closed her eyes. What on earth have you gotten yourself into? Even though she had gotten exactly what she wanted from the man, she regretted her actions thoroughly. She’d been stupid and immature, and now she’d made herself incredibly sick, meaning not only was he having to take care of her, but Soren as well, which she knew was going to be a lot for him. Not to mention the “important work” she’d no doubt taken him away from. As much as she enjoyed having him hold her and care for her and massage her with potions, she was starting to feel really awful about being so impulsive and, well, bratty. How could he ever take her seriously again? She was truly mortified. Even though she knew he thought she was childish, in reality the way she had acted was so out of character for her. There was something about being around him that made her want to let go of that mature, adult persona and just be free of responsibility, and just be taken care of without a single worry about the real world. 

She closed her eyes and tried to remember the way he smelled and the way his hands felt caressing her body and soon the potions hit and she was deep in sleep, a smile plastered to her face. 

It was too late to get any more sleep, so Snape spent the next hour or so trying to get as much work done as possible. He was getting nowhere, and he was exhausted and frustrated. As angry as he wanted to be with Marie for her ridiculous behavior— the timing of which couldn’t have been worse— he couldn’t deny that he was enjoying taking care of her. Certainly he savored having a reason to be so close to her, to hold her, touch her, caress her skin…but it was dangerous. And he knew he had to put a stop to it. He’d decided on a life of celibacy years ago so he could keep his life simple. Not soon enough, sadly.

All morning long, he tried to boot her from his thoughts so he could focus, but flashbacks of the feel of her skin, the smell of her hair, the color of her eyes in the sunlight were all bombarding his consciousness. He wanted nothing more than to go back to her room and sit next to her, hold her, and nurse her back to health. Focus, you fool. There’s no time for this sentimental nonsense or you’ll lose everything, including her.

Eventually he gave up, throwing his notes onto the table and attempting to at least enjoy a cup of tea before he had to deal with Soren.

At quarter to 8, Snape strode into Soren’s room and opened his curtains with a flick of his wrist. “Up you get, Soren. Ms. Cloutier will be convalescing today, but your day will continue as usual.”

Soren scrunched his face up and threw an arm over his eyes before rolling onto his stomach and burying his face in the pillows. Ms. Cloutier always woke him gently and gave him a moment to settle into the morning before she turned on lights or opened curtains. “Nooo, it’s too bright!”

Snape flicked his wand and Soren’s duvet was pulled down to the edge of the bed. “Up you get. Out of bed, wash your face, comb your hair, and get changed into your school clothes. You have fifteen minutes to be downstairs for breakfast.”

Soren reached for the duvet while keeping his eyes firmly shut, but when he opened them, his father was looming over him. 

“If you pull that duvet back on top of you, I will toss you into a tub of freezing water. I’m not leaving until I see both of your feet on the floor.”

Soren groaned one more time. 

“Now, Soren.”

With an impressive scowl that was no doubt genetically programmed, Soren rolled to the edge of the bed, put his feet on the ground and crossed his arms. “I’m up. Happy?”

“I think not.” Snape said with disbelief before he grabbed the little boy’s arm and pulled him closer. “You are dangerously close to starting your day in a very uncomfortable manner. If you’re having this much trouble getting out of bed, perhaps you should go to bed earlier tonight.”

“Sorry, father.” Soren said quickly. The adrenaline rush of such a close call quickly brought him to his senses.

“You have fifteen minutes before I want to see you dressed in your school clothes and downstairs in a much more pleasant mood. I will warn you now, I refuse to tolerate any more cheek from you today, so if I were you, I’d make a Herculean effort to be on my best behavior. Unlike Ms. Cloutier, I will have zero hesitation to correct you, harshly, if you dare to speak to me like that again.” Snape stared him down, hoping that would cure him of any further insolence this morning. 

“Yes, father.”

Snape gave a sharp nod and headed for the door. “And make your bed before you come down.”

“But I never make my bed. Tinny does it for me, or Ms. Cloutier,” Soren whined. 

Snape turned around. “Not anymore. You’re 7 years-old, you are perfectly capable of making your bed without magic.” In fact, it was something Snape had always insisted his Slytherins do every morning.

“Yes, sir.”

Soren waited for him to leave and then put a scowl back on his face. He complained loudly to his rabbit as he washed his face and combed his hair. It was going to be a long day without Ms. Cloutier. 

Despite the rough start to the morning, Soren and Snape enjoyed a fairly relaxed breakfast, although it was far quieter without Marie there. 

“When we finish here, you will go to the classroom as usual.”

“But I thought Ms. Cloutier was sick?” Soren looked up at his father quizzically.

“She is. I’ll be teaching you today.”

Soren giggled. “That’s silly, father. You’re not a teacher!”

“I’m sure I’ll manage, it’s not like she’s teaching you astrophysics. And you’d do well to be on time, at your desk, ready to learn. We’ll be doing things my way today, which means you won’t be playing with leprechaun gold or whatever nonsense you get up to with Ms. Cloutier.”

“It’s not nonsense, father! Ms. Cloutier says you remember more when you learn by doing.” Soren repeated faithfully. 

“Yes, I’m sure she does. But today you will learn by listening and focusing, and perhaps if you manage that, we will have some practical work.”

“Are you going to teach me about planets?”

Snape poured himself another cup of tea. “No, I’m going to teach you about potions. And if you do well this morning, I may allow you into the laboratory with me this afternoon while I brew. But only—and I mean this— only if you can prove to me you can follow directions. As you know it can be extremely dangerous there, and if I cannot trust you to listen carefully to everything I say, I will not allow you anywhere near the dungeon. We’ll go over all of the safety rules in class.”

This news thrilled Soren. He practically jumped out of his chair with excitement, the smile on his face causing his cheeks to hurt. “I’m very good at following directions, father!”

“We’ll see.” Snape said, hoping that would give the boy some incentive to stay focused. “Now finish your breakfast. And drink all of your milk.”

Soren was determined to be the best boy ever today. He couldn’t believe his father was going to take him down to the potions lab. He’d been dying to see what he does down there. He shoved in the rest of his eggs and washed it down with the remainder of his milk before wiping his face. “Father, may I please be excused?”

“Yes. Brush your teeth and tidy up, I’ll see you in the classroom shortly.”

Soren pushed his chair in and sprinted for the stairs. 

“Do not run!” Snape said loudly over his shoulder, letting out an exasperated sigh. He finished his tea and glanced at his watch. There was just enough time to stop by and check on Marie before he stepped into the classroom for the first time in many, many years. He hated to admit it, but part of him did miss it, despite the fact he’d spent his entire career moaning about how much he loathed it. 

Chapter Text

Snape burst through the door of the classroom, his teaching robes flowing, his wand at the ready, making a dramatic entrance despite the fact the only one waiting for him was a small 7 year-old boy seated enthusiastically at his desk, watching the man’s every move in quiet awe. 

“You will pay close attention to everything I say, and you will remain seated for the duration of this class. If you wish to ask a question or clarify anything, you will raise your hand and wait to be called on. There will be no speaking out of turn, no fidgeting, and no distractions while I am speaking. Is that clear?” Snape stared at Soren from the front of the room, his arms clasped behind his back, his countenance leaving no room for questions.

“Yes, father.”

“And you should be clear that, whilst we are in the classroom, I am acting in the capacity of your teacher, not your father, so you will address me as ‘Sir’ or ”Professor.”

Soren’s eyes went wide and he nodded his head. “Yes, sir.” 

“Very good.”

Snape paced slowly around the front of the classroom while he spoke. “I realize you are still quite young, but I would like to use this opportunity today to explain some of the theory behind potion-making and the ways in which some of the plants and other ingredients imbue potions with specific magical properties. If you can understand the ways these ingredients act on their own, and what they contribute when they are in combination with one another, you can begin to understand the concepts that lay the foundation for potioneering.”

Soren was completely engaged, he’d never seen his father in this way before and he leaned forward in his chair, excited and entranced. 

“I want you to imagine each ingredient in the same way you would a unique human being.  Like people, every ingredient has its own ‘personality’— special properties, strengths and weaknesses. Some situations will bring out their positive qualities, whilst others can bring out their negative side. They may be easy to work with in some circumstances, while others make them difficult or even impossible to work with. You may find that certain ingredients that bolster particular qualities, whilst others mute or repress them. It may seem complicated, but once you learn how each ingredient affects one another, you can begin to predict how they will behave, allowing you to combine them in any number of ways to create new potions.”

Snape realized that some of these concepts might be far above Soren’s level of comprehension, but he was going to try anyway. He would see what the boy understood and adjust himself accordingly. “Do you understand what I am saying so far?”

“Yes, sir,” Soren said, nodding his head. 

“Very good. Let’s take an example, then. Do you know what this is?” Snape pulled a specimen out of his pocket and placed it on Soren’s desk.

“Is this Wiggentree bark, father?” Soren asked innocently. “You showed it to me in the garden that time, remember?”

Impressive. “It is indeed. Very good, Soren. Also, please remember right now I am acting as your professor, not your father. But yes, you are correct.”

Soren smiled as he turned the bark over in his hands, scratching it slightly and then bringing it to his nose, familiarizing himself with the way it looked, felt, and smelled.

“Can you name any of its properties?” Snape hoped he hadn’t pushed too far, he was curious to see how much Soren knew, but didn’t want to discourage him by creating unreasonable expectations. Rubbish. Stop letting Ms. Cloutier get in your head, he’s not going to be traumatized because you asked him a simple question.

Soren sat in contemplation for a moment, holding the bark and looking up nervously at his father. “I don’t know. I remember you said you use it in Polyjuice Potion, but I don’t know what that is.” There was slight hesitation in his voice and a disappointed look in his eyes as he handed the piece of bark back to his father. 

“Excellent memory, Soren. You’re quite right,” Snape encouraged. To be honest, he was pleasantly surprised, he had no idea the boy was paying that much attention to him that day in the garden. Now that he knew Soren could absorb things, he’d have to make more of an effort to spend time with him pointing out all of the magical plants in the garden. “Polyjuice is a potion that can be used to alter the appearance of the person who takes it into the appearance of someone else.”

“Really?” Soren’s eyes went wide with delight. “So you can change into anyone?”

“Indeed. Provided you have hair from the person you wish to transform into.”

“Does it hurt?” 

“It depends. It can be uncomfortable during the shift, particularly as bones grow and shift. But it is short-lived, and not generally very painful.”

“Wow!”

“So if I told you that Wiggentree bark was an essential ingredient in Polyjuice potion, what kind of properties do you think would be important for a potion that can change one person’s form into another.”

Soren shook his head, “I don’t—“

Snape put his hand out. “No, I don’t want to hear that. I don’t expect you to know the answer, but I want to challenge you to think critically. Take a moment to reflect. Be creative. It’s perfectly acceptable to be wrong, I just want you to try.”

The little boy fidgeted in his seat, not wanting to disappoint his father, but his mind was swirling with anxiety and self-doubt, and he couldn’t think clearly at all.

Realizing that Soren was struggling, Snape continued. “Let’s try this. I will give you some information about some of the other ingredients, then perhaps you will get a clearer picture of the properties required for this potion to function. Boomslang skin. It comes from the African boomslang snake. A snake known to feed on chameleons. Do you know what those are?” 

“No, sir.”

“They are small lizards that can change their color and appearance rapidly to blend in with their environment. Since this is a main food source for the boomslang, the snake itself takes on some of those magical properties. When used in Polyjuice Potion, boomslang skin—which comes from the shedding of this snake—is used to ensure that there is only a change on the outside, while allowing the person to remain the same underneath. Does that make sense? If I were to take Polyjuice Potion, my appearance would change, but my mind and the person I am inside, will not be altered. Boomslang works with the Wiggentree bark to enhance some of its special properties, while also ensuring that the change is only on the outside.”

“Yes, sir. I understand.”

“Good. Now then, another ingredient is Fluxweed. This plant is one that has very different magical properties depending on when it is picked. For Polyjuice, it must be harvested at the full-moon, which then imbibes it with properties that work almost like a time clock, ensuring that any change is temporary. The length of transformation will depend on how much you add; the more you add, the longer the transformation will last. However, there is a limit. Too much Fluxweed and the potion becomes unstable, and the transformation may start to happen at different times rather than synchronized, or there may be complications with some of the features not returning to the way they were before. So one has to work within a fairly small range for the Fluxweed to work properly.”

Soren nodded his head. “I understand. Just like when we’re baking. Ms. Cloutier says if you don’t measure correctly, not enough baking soda can make your cookies flat. But too much and they get too heavy and taste yucky. That’s why it is important to measure correctly.”

“That’s absolutely right. Precision in potion-making is essential. Now then. Why don’t you give me some ideas about Wiggentree bark.”

When Soren froze, Snape paused another minute before adding. “Do you remember what else did I told you about this tree?”

Soren bit his lip slightly as the memory of his father in the garden played in his head. “You said that it changes the way it looks depending on what is around it. If it is planted near other plants and trees that need shade, it will grow lots of leaves. If there are birds, it will stay thorny to protect the nests. And if it grows next to a pond it will flower and drop seeds and fruit for the fish and pond animals.”

Again, Snape raised an eyebrow in astonishment. “That’s correct. I’m very impressed that you remembered that, Soren. Well done. Now take it one step further. What do you think the bark of a tree such as this might do in a potion like Polyjuice?”

Soren was tempted to shrug his shoulders, but he desperately wanted to please his father. He fidgeted with his quill for a minute before he whispered. “Maybe it helps people change the way they look based on what is added with it?”

Snape had rarely ever given points as a professor at Hogwarts, but if ever he had an impulse to reward a student, it was now. “That is exactly right. Wiggentree bark is one of the main ingredients that results in transformation. When paired with boomslang skin, which as we said keeps the inside of the person the same, and Fluxweed which causes a temporary change, these three ingredients make up the core components of Polyjuice.”

A huge smile burst forth on Soren’s face at the praise, he’d never seen his father so clearly pleased with him. 

“Now then, we will go through each of the other ingredients one by one. This is by far a more complex potion than most, but if you can comprehend this, it will go a long way to enhancing your ability to understand some of the most important elements of potion-making.”

With a flick of his wand, all of the ingredients for Polyjuice appeared on the board alongside a brief description of each of their properties. Snape continued to lecture while Soren leaned forward, paying rapt attention to his every word. As a result, the morning passed quickly for both of them. 

“Now then, potion-making is comprised of far more than just the ingredients and their properties. You must also take into account the way in which you prepare them, how you add them, when you add them, in what order— even how many stirs, which direction, and whether it is with a glass rod or a wooden stirrer—all of this will have an effect on the final outcome. But we will discuss those concepts on a different day. Hopefully this is suffidient to start. Do you have any questions?”

“Can you add more than one person’s hair to the Polyjuice?” 

Snape paused for a moment to think through the question. “No. If you did, you would get an incomplete transformation, or possibly a random combination of the two. There would be no way to know which properties would come through from what sample. It could even result in each eye being different, facial features that are a mix of the two, or even one arm or leg shorter than the other. It would be absolute chaos. If it even worked at all. In a complex potion such as this, it is possible the potion itself will feel overloaded and simply combust.”

“Oh. Did you ever try it?”

“Of course not. I have absolutely no desire to blow myself to pieces or to turn into some kind of Frankenstein monster. One has to be very careful experimenting with potions like this, it could result in permanent damage or disfigurement, which is precisely why I do not want you anywhere near here when I am experimenting with new potions.” Snape had responded quite quickly, but he couldn’t stop his mind from running with the idea. Would it be possible somehow? To pick and choose which properties came through from two different samples? Was there a way to even make a potion like this stable enough for consumption? He knew the idea was ludacris, but he filed it away. 

“Now then, before we go to lunch, I want to go over my rules for the potions lab. Are you listening?”

“Yes, sir,” Soren said, sitting up straight and looking his father right in the eyes. He’d been on his best behavior all morning, although it hadn’t been too hard, he’d really enjoyed having his father in the classroom. He loved Ms. Cloutier, and he always had fun and learned a lot with her, but today’s lesson had challenged him in a different way and he was reveling in having his father’s full attention for so many hours.

“As you know, the potions lab is an extremely dangerous place, even for wizards much older than you. There are ingredients there that on their own can cause severe harm. Certainly there are all manner of potions that could be very dangerous, even life-threatening. So you are not to touch anything. Not a bottle, not a stirrer, not even a piece of dust you see on the floor. Nothing. Everything in that room is completely off-limits to you. You will sit where I tell you to and remain as still as a statue whilst I am brewing. You will not speak unless I ask you a question, and if at any point you violate any of these rules, you will be promptly removed and banned from the lab until further notice. Is that clear?”

“Yes, sir. I promise I’ll follow the rules.” Soren swallowed, knowing that there was no room for error, but he was determined to do everything right. There was no way he wanted to miss out on his chance to be with his father while he brewed. 

“You had better,” Snape said, staring down at him with his most foreboding look. “I mean it, Soren, there is a zero tolerance policy for any nonsense when we are down there. One strike and you’re out.”

“I understand, I’ll be good.”

“Very well. Do not make me regret this decision. I also hope it is extremely clear that the only reason you are being allowed into the lab is because you are under my direct supervision. This is a one-time exception. Otherweise, the rules still remain in place— barring an extreme emergency, you are not permitted to even step foot on the dungeon steps without my express permission, and the entire dungeon is completely off-limits for you under normal circumstances, is that clear?”

“Yes, father.” Soren nodded. 

“And if you ever ever disobey me and enter the potions lab without me—mark my word—it will be the biggest regret of your young life.” Snape stared him down to make sure there was no confusion on this matter.

“I won’t, I promise.”

With a nod of his head, Snape lightened his voice. “Now then, take a few minutes, tidy up, wash your hands, and we will have lunch. I will see you in the dining room in fifteen minutes.”

Snape took these few minutes before lunch as an opportunity to check-in on Marie. He knocked softly on her door, not wanting to wake her but also not wanting to barge in without permission. He put his hand on the door and waited patiently until he heard a strained voice say “Come in” in what was barely above a whisper. 

With the curtains closed, her room remained dark, the only light coming from the embers in her hearth and a small lamp on her bedside table that illuminated her face with candlelight. If not for the dark circles under her eyes, she looked almost angelic with the soft golden glow reflecting off of her pale skin. 

“How are you feeling?” Snape asked gently from the foot of her bed, not wanting to crowd her.

“Weak, but a bit better.”

“Any more fevers?”

“I don’t think so.”

Snape stared at the tray of breakfast still sitting by her bed. “You should really try and eat. It will give you strength, help you heal more quickly.”

“I know, I just can’t right now. I have no appetite.” Her dry lips cracked as she spoke, and her mouth felt like it was made of cotton.

“While I would be much more pleased to see you eat something, I understand that you’re not hungry. That being said, I know I gave you specific instructions to push fluids. You look completely dehydrated.” Snape’s voice took on a small edge and he circled around to her bedside, picking up her wrist and feeling for her pulse, which was thready and weak. He turned her hand over and pinched the skin just beyond her knuckles, pulling it up slightly. Instead of snapping back into place as it should have, it tented, and a scowl passed over Snape’s face.

“You are dangerously dehydrated, Ms. Cloutier. How much have you had to drink? It’s been several hours and the pitcher I left by your bedside is still nearly full.”

Marie blushed slightly. “I don’t know. Just a few sips, I suppose. I had a little bit of tea…but mostly I’ve been trying to rest.”

Snape was clearly displeased and he leered down at her, sharpening his tone. “You were given two very simple instructions. One was to rest, the other was to hydrate. One out of two isn’t good enough. You’ve had high fevers through the night, you have a productive cough and an infection in your lungs. You need fluids, desperately.”

“I’ll try to drink more,” she said, hoping that would get him off of her back.

“Oh, you’ll do more than try.” Snape grabbed her glass from the table and filled it with water. “Drink this. All of it.”

“I will. Just leave it there.”

“No, you will drink it now, while I am here to make sure it is done. And then I will send Tinny for you to have another glass in half an hour and every subsequent hour after that. And if you are not visibly improved by the time I finish Soren’s afternoon lessons, I will resort to far less pleasant methods to ensure you are getting enough fluids. This is not a game, Ms. Cloutier. I do not wish to see you end up in St. Mungo’s because you are too stubborn to follow my instructions.”

“You’re teaching Soren?” Marie was both surprised and amused, although she barely had the energy to allow a small smile to cross her lips. 

“Well, someone has to. I refuse to let him waste another day because his governess is a complete failure at looking after herself. And don’t change the subject, Ms. Cloutier, I was in the middle of giving you a stern talking-to, but it appears you didn’t hear a thing I said. Do I need to repeat myself?”

“No. I’m listening. I’ll drink more, I promise. I’ve just been too weak and tired to pick up the glass.” 

“Then you need to say so, so that Tinny and I can assist you.” There was exasperation in his voice, but mostly it was concern. Usually he felt he could make his point with some scolding and a few threats, but at the moment it didn’t seem quite sufficient, so he decided to up the ante with some shame and guilt. 

“If you’re not concerned enough about your own health to ask for help, perhaps you should think about Soren instead. Do you have any idea what it did to him to see you collapse onto the floor like that? He was inconsolable. It doesn’t take much thought to recognize how extremely traumatizing it was for him after witnessing his own mother suffer terribly from a fatal ailment. He was beside himself all day, worrying incessantly that you were going to die and leave him as well. I did my best to reassure him, promising that I would do everything possible to take care of you and make sure nothing bad happens to you. So it would be extremely disappointing if we had to cart you off to St. Mungos because you were too stubborn to drink enough fluids. I will not allow you to do that to yourself, or to Soren. He’s been through enough.”

It was a low blow, although Snape meant every word. Of course he wanted Marie to be well—that was his first priority—but equally important to him was ensuring that he kept his word to Soren. He knew, whatever it took, he wouldn’t let anything happen to her.

Marie looked devastated, she hadn’t even thought about how triggering it must have been for Soren to see her in that state. She felt the emotions well up inside of her, but she was far too dry for tears to gather in her eyes. “Is he OK?”

“How good of you to finally ask.” Snape replied coldly. “You owe him an explanation and an apology when you are better. While no one can control being sick, I think we can both agree that you played quite a role in weakening yourself with your immature behavior. Soren doesn’t need to know that, but I hope you will put his mind at ease so that he doesn’t continue to worry that you will drop dead on him at any moment.”

The look on Marie’s face made it clear she was heartbroken, and while Snape would have gladly lectured her further, he turned his attention to the task at hand. “I hope you will keep him in mind as you search for the motivation to help yourself. Now sit up, you are going to finish this glass of water before I leave.”

Marie put all of her effort into trying to push herself up, but she didn’t have nearly enough energy, and the moment she raised her head, the blackness entered from the side of her vision and she felt like she might faint again. She reached up to press on her eyes and laid her head back down. “Wait.”

When he saw she was struggling, Snape waited a moment before moving her effortlessly up to a sitting position, leaning her gently against the headboard. He brought the glass to her dry lips. “Come now, small sips.”

Marie closed her eyes and let the cool water quench her parched mouth. As soon as it hit her tongue she realized just how thirsty she really was. She opened her mouth a little more and took a bigger sip, reveling in the feel of the cold liquid traveling down her throat and into her empty stomach, giving her a slight chill.

“There you go. That’s a good girl,” Snape crooned in encouragement “Keep going.”

Once she’d emptied most of the glass, Snape set it down. “Take a small break. I don’t want you to get sick. I must go, but Tinny will help you drink more in a few minutes.”

“Thank you.”

“If you want to thank me, you can do so by making sure you are in much better shape when I return later this afternoon. Tinny will also bring you some juice when he comes, you need the sugar and electrolytes. And I want you to have at least three more glasses of water over the next few hours. If you feel like having something else, let Tinny know. Whatever seems most palatable for you at the moment. And if you can possibly stand it, perhaps some broth or soup, but I won’t push it.”

Snape reached up and put a hand on her forehead to make sure her fever hadn’t returned. When her skin felt cool beneath his palm, he dropped his hand to her chin, taking it between his thumb and fingers so he could lift her head and look her directly in the eye. “Can you promise me you will do this? Or do I need to make threats?” He raised a single eyebrow at her. 

“I’ll try.”

“No, you will not try. You will do it. You do not want me resorting to the alternatives, I assure you.”

“I’ll do it. I promise.” Marie had no idea what the alternatives were, but she imagined they were fairly unpleasant and she didn’t think she could take much more humiliation. It was bad enough Lord Kent was seeing her like this, all sick and crusty with no makeup, laying in bed in her pajamas. 

“Good. Now rest. I’ll send Tinny up shortly to help you. If you need anything, you ask for Tinny right away. If you need potions for pain or nausea, or anything else, you have him come get me.”

“I will. Thank you.”

Snape refilled her glass once more and left it on the table before exiting her room and closing the door behind him. He really hoped she would listen to him this time. Even though he’d be a bit harsh with her, he knew she was struggling to get the fluids down. But he worried that the potions he was giving her might harm her kidneys if she remained this dehydrated, he would have to stop giving her the anti-infection potion and then he’d have no choice but to take her to St. Mungos. Once her kidneys were damaged, it was a short distance to complications that were far outside of his ability to manage safely on his own. 

Out in the hallway, he exhaled slowly and made his way to his study, deciding he had no choice but to send a message to Harry, letting him know what was going on just in case he needed to make arrangements quickly.  

“One step at a time. Walk. Slowly. These stairs are steep and the walls are slippery.” Snape wondered if he shouldn’t just appararate them both down there, or maybe even carry the boy down, but he knew both of these options would be unpleasant for Soren for different reasons. 

“I am,” Soren replied, clearly frustrated at having his father treating him like a baby. 

Snape stopped and turned his head quickly, flashing Soren an angry look. “Mind your tone.”

“Sorry.” Soren put on his most contrite face and softest tone.

Snape grabbed Soren’s wrist more tightly and resumed his slow descent down the stairs, his back flush against the outer wall, putting himself in front of the boy in case he slipped or fell.

Soren hated being treated like a helpless baby, and he was dying to complain that he was perfectly capable of walking down the steps by himself (he’d made it halfway down sprinting the last time), but he was almost certain if he said one more word, his father would take him straight back upstairs and that would be the end of it. So he huffed silently to himself as his father led him carefully down the winding stairs at a snail’s pace. 

When they reached the bottom, Soren expected him to let go of his wrist, but instead the man kept a tight hold, dragging him past several large cauldrons, all bubbling in various stages of brew before depositing him on a stool in the middle of the floor. There wasn’t a single bench, table, cauldron, or shelf within arms reach, he felt like a human equivalent of a small desert island isolated in the vast, cluttered space of the dungeon.

“Sit here, do not move. Do not get up. Do not touch anything. Do not speak unless spoken to. Is that all clear?”

Part of Soren wanted to be irritated that he was being treated like a complete menace, but he was too excited. The lab was enormous, and he’d never seen anything like it before in his entire life. He turned his head slowly, taking it all in; thousands of jars and bottles on the shelves, books everywhere, cauldrons, stirrers, knives, and other contraptions he didn’t recognize, it was the coolest place he’d ever seen. 

Snape clicked his fingers loudly in front of the boy’s face, his irritation evident. “Pay attention. If you’re too distracted to listen, I will take you upstairs right now.”

“No father, I’m paying attention!” Soren swung his head around and looked at the man with big round eyes. “You said not to move, not to touch anything, and not to talk. I won’t!”

Satisfied, Snape gave him a nod. “Good. Then focus. I won’t tell you again.” He gave the boy one last look before walking over to the shelves and starting to pull out various ingredients. 

One by one he reached for jars, sachets, and even a box that appeared to have something alive inside of it. “Gather all of your ingredients first. Always. You do not want to be halfway into your brewing when you realize you’re out of one of them, or do not have enough. Measure everything twice. There is no room for error.”

Soren sat perfectly still, watching his father as he separated everything out, putting the carefully measured ingredients into their own little bowls, dishes, and beakers. Then he carefully opened the box and reached in. From where he was sitting, Soren couldn’t see what was in the box and he gradually started to stand so he could get a better look. 

“Your backside had better still be on that stool,” the man said loudly, his back to Soren as his hands hovered above the box, a large pair of forceps in his hand. 

Soren sat back down quickly, wondering if the man had eyes in the back of his head. 

Finally, Snape pulled out one of the large stag beetles, stunning it quickly with his wand before crushing it, dicing it into fine pieces and throwing it into a little dish. He did this three more times before he cleaned the surface and wiped his knife. 

It took every ounce of self-control Soren had not to ask him what he was doing, wishing he could see things a little more clearly. 

“I have selected four male stag beetles, and crushed and diced them with a silver knife.” Snape said for Soren’s benefit. “These beetles have fed on rotting hazel wood, a type of wood known for having properties that help locate and procure water. When used in a wand, hazel often allows the witch or wizard great control over the element of water.”

Soren made a mental note, in case his father asked him about it later. Although he was starting to realize he could remember almost anything he’s ever seen or heard without much effort at all, a skill he was finding to be very useful when it came to answering his father’s questions. 

After Snape had all of his ingredients prepared, measured, and put into individual bowls and dishes, he put them on a tray and brought them to the small table nearest to the empty copper cauldron where he would be brewing. He lit a fire with his wand, silently, and waited for the metal to heat. 

“Today I am preparing a rehydration potion. It is fairly straightforward, but it can be a life-saving aid for people who need to make the most of what little water they have ingested, whether that is due to illness, or in the case of a witch or wizard who does not have access to water.”

“Why don’t they just do aguamenti? Then they can drink that.” Soren sounded unimpressed. 

Snape whipped his head around to stare at Soren. “What did I tell you about speaking out of turn? You will hold your questions until I ask you for them. Thankfully I have not yet started brewing, but if you cannot follow the rules, I will take you upstairs, and you will spend the remainder of the afternoon writing lines…or rather letters of the alphabet, in your case— until your hand falls off. Once I start brewing, I don’t want to hear another word.”

“Sorry,” Soren mumbled under his breath, disappointed in himself for breaking the rules not even ten minutes in.

“But to answer your question, aguamenti is technically a summoning charm, it takes water from somewhere else, it does not create water from thin air, although theoretically it can amass small water droplets from the air. However, that would take a lot of effort and time for very little reward, although not impossible. But if there is no water nearby, or if the witch or wizard is too weak to summon it, aguamenti isn’t going to be helpful. For example, if one was deep in the desert, or some other remote place without a nearby water source, aguamenti would be useless. Additionally, once they have summoned it, depending on the severity of their dehydration, they may not have the energy to summon enough of it to hydrate them properly. And, if you were listening, you would have heard me say that it can also be effective for those suffering from illnesses that prevent them from hydrating themselves properly. In the case of some stomach ailments, or perhaps with a patient who is unconscious or has injuries to the throat. It is useful for a vast number of situations. Now pay close attention.”

Snape moved to fill his cauldron with water that he had carefully measured into a small beaker. “We will begin with water that comes from the Nubian springs of Egypt, which has magical healing properties and sets the perfect foundation for this potion. Next we will add in four split leaves from an aloe plant, harvested on the full moon.” He stirred fifteen times counterclockwise. 

Soren wished his stool was taller so he could see inside of the cauldron, but he remained firmly in place, not wanting to risk breaking another rule and being tossed out of the lab just as things were getting started.

“Next I am adding a paste made from mostly ginger and peppermint, with a small bit of spearmint. These have stomach soothing properties and are good for combatting nausea. They make for a much more palatable potion as well. This is particularly useful for patients who have been ill, as it is imperative that they tolerate the potion long enough for it to work. Next we will bring that to a boil and then add in valerian root, chamomile, and our crushed stag beetles.” 

As the minutes ticked by, Soren sat quietly on his stool, watching as his father tended to the potion, deep in focus. Occasionally he would forget to narrate, but Soren was beginning to get a sense of why it took so much concentration. He watched the way his father’s hands moved at each step, the way he held his stirrer, the speed with which he stirred the cauldron, how he added each ingredient into the cauldron. He tried to commit each of those movements to memory, knowing even if he wasn’t going to be brewing for quite some time, he would do well to copy his father's movements. It was clear, even to Soren who had never seen someone properly brew a potion, that his father possessed true skill.

Snape attempted to use the breaks between steps to explain the properties of each ingredient, trying not to lose focus, even though he could brew a simple potion like this in his sleep. Still, he was a perfectionist, and even after all these years, he put every ounce of his energy into his potion-making. It was extra important to him that this particular potion turned out perfectly in case he needed to give it to Marie. 

“Finally, we add the scales of a freshwater mermaid and one single drop of unicorn blood— this is a highly prized ingredient and very difficult to find, so you want to be exceptionally careful with it. Once all of the ingredients are in the cauldron, we finish by placing a quartz crystal into the bottom of our cauldron before letting this mixture simmer for a minimum of one hour. After that, it needs to be bottled in a silver vial.”

Soren was suitably impressed, and if he could have, he would have clapped for his father’s extraordinary brewing, but instead he waited patiently for the man to address him. 

“Now you may ask any questions.”

“Why did you put the crystal in?”

“It has purifying properties. It will ensure that the potion attracts only the purest and cleanest of water.”

“Oh.”

“Do you understand how all of these ingredients worked together?” 

“Yes, sir. Thanks for letting me watch. You’re really good at that! When can I make a potion? I think I know how to do it now.”

“Although many people use improper terminology, one doesn’t ‘make’ a potion. It is proper to say one ‘brews’ it. And as I told you when you arrived, you will not be doing anything related to magic for years to come, you are far too young. I will teach you theory, and you will learn about ingredients, and their properties, and perhaps I will let you prepare them at some point far in the future, once you’ve turned 11. But you will not be doing any brewing until you are much, much older.”

“Why not?,” Soren said, sounding disappointed. “It’s not like you need a wand or anything.”

Snape raised an eye. “No, you do not need a wand, but you need a developed magical core. With each step—when you stir, when you add, when you prepare the ingredients—you are infusing them with your own magic and intention. If you do not have proper control of your magic, the magical properties of your ingredients may become unstable and Merlin knows how that could end up. Which is exactly why I won’t allow you to touch anything right now.” It is also exactly why your mother blew herself up attempting a healing potion.

“So now what do we do?”

“We do not do anything, I will take you upstairs and you can play outside in the gardens with Tinny for a bit while I do some other work and wait for this potion to finish brewing. Then we will have our reading time before supper.”

“Can I go visit Ms. Cloutier?”

“No, you may not. She needs her rest. You will see her when she’s feeling better.”

“I wish I could draw her a picture, but I don’t have any markers or colored pencils. Or even a color-changing quill.” Soren looked at his father with his saddest puppy-dog eyes, wishing the man would relent and allow him to have some art supplies or something he could do for fun.

“You will not manipulate me into changing my mind, Soren, so you can quit pouting. Right now I want you to concentrate on other things. You may practice your reading, or you may go outside and get some exercise and fresh air. When I see you’re suitably caught up in your studies and are managing your time effectively, I will consider allowing you to begin a hobby, but we’re still far away from that. Now come along, let’s get you upstairs.” Snape reached out to take his hand, but the boy angrily pulled away.

“No!” Soren said, turning his body away.

“I beg your pardon?” Snape asked, incredulous at the sudden, unexpected defiance. “Watch yourself, little boy.”

“I can walk by myself you know, I’m not a toddler,” Soren snapped, upset that his father was being so unfair, and feeling a little more free to be difficult now that his time in the potions lab was at an end. 

“You say you’re not a toddler, yet you are certainly acting like one. And if you dare speak to me again in such a petulant tone again, you’ll go directly over my knee.” Snape stared him down for several seconds before grabbing his wrist and marching him toward the dungeon stairs. “And I’m quite aware that you know how to walk. However, these stairs are grossly uneven— some of the stones are loose or broken—there is no railing, and the walls can be slippery. I will not have you breaking your impertinent little neck just because you’re intent on acting too big for your britches. Now you have two choices, either you stop this tantrum at once and allow me to help you walk up the stairs, or I toss you over my shoulder and carry you up that way. Your choice.”

Soren scowled and spat out his response, his tone dripping in annoyance. “Fine, I’ll walk then. Just hurry up.”

Snape raised an eyebrow but kept his voice terrifyingly calm. “It appears you need far more than just some assistance to get up the stairs, you are clearly also in desperate need of an attitude adjustment. Very well, let’s go.” Before Soren could respond, Snape grasped him by the upper arm and pushed him up the first stair, staying one step behind him. “After you.”

Soren turned around to look at him with regret, a single hand snaking behind him to cover his bum. “I’m sorry, father, I didn’t mean to be rude.”

“Move your hand, Soren, I’m not going to smack you on the stairs for Merlin’s sake, my whole goal is to get you up to the parlor in one piece. Now face forward, put your hand on the wall, and walk slowly, one step at a time. I’m holding tight to your other arm, so if you slip, I will not let you fall. Just focus and go slowly. I will deal with your abysmal attitude when we get upstairs.”

Soren did exactly as he was told, going extra slow, hoping that if he was particularly cooperative, maybe his father would change his mind by the time they made it to the parlor. Although he knew that was wishful thinking.

When they reached the top of the stairs, Snape kept a firm hold on Soren’s arm, using his wand to close and lock the door behind them. Without missing a beat, he walked Soren over to the couch and sat down, positioning the boy to his right before releasing him.

“Please, father, I’m sorry.” Soren pleaded. “I didn’t mean to be rude! I’m sorry!”

Snape was unfazed as he tucked away his wand and rolled up his right sleeve. As he spoke, he kept his voice completely even and calm, as though he were carrying out any normal daily activity. “You should know by now, when I generously give you an opportunity to modify your behavior, you should take it. If you don’t, rest assured I will do it for you.” And with that, he reached up and took Soren by the arm, pulling him over his lap in one fell swoop. Before Soren even had a chance to say anything, Snape brought his hand down hard on the boy’s backside. He gave him a good dozen whacks before he stopped, making sure he ended with two particularly hard smacks to the his sit spots. Snape didn’t consider this a true punishment by any stretch, just a short, sharp correction to get Soren back in line. When he finished, he pulled the boy onto his feet and stood, leering down at him with a hand on his shoulder. “Are you ready to behave respectfully now or do you need some time in the corner to reflect on it?” 

“No, sir. I’ll behave respectfully.” Soren didn’t cry, but there were tears welling in his eyes. His bum was stinging quite a bit, but it was his pride that was especially wounded. He’d been desperate to prove that even if he was only seven, he was capable, clever, and grown up enough to start learning magic. But instead he’d been hauled over his father’s knee and spanked like the little kid he was, putting him promptly back in his place. “I’m sorry, father.”

“I’ve had to tell you several times today to mind your tone and watch how you speak to me and I do not appreciate having to repeat myself. Hopefully that little smacking will be a sufficient enough reminder to behave. But I’m warning you, Soren, if I hear one more disrespectful tone or cheeky reply, we will go straight to the study where your trousers will come down and you’ll get a proper hiding. Am I clear?”

“Yes, father.” Soren was feeling especially sorry for himself at the moment, but he tried not to let any tears fall. 

“Very well, then let’s move on. You were rude, you got a few very well-deserved smacks, and now it is over. There’s no reason to sulk over it. Now then, shall we have some tea? Then you can go outside for a bit before we do our reading session.”

Soren nodded, wiping away two stray tears with the back of his hand. 

Snape gave him a few fatherly pats on the shoulder. “That’s enough. Chin up, Soren, you’ve been punished and now it’s over. Now take a seat and we’ll enjoy some tea and biscuits whilst you tell me about the most interesting thing that you learned today. I must admit, I was very impressed with how intuitive you were in understanding magical properties of different ingredients. Hopefully when you get to Hogwarts, you’ll excel in Potions, just like your father.”  Snape settled himself into his armchair, calling for Tinny to bring them tea.

A genuine smile appeared on Soren’s face, it was the first time he felt like his father really believed he was good at something. And even though he was disappointed that he’d ended things on such a sour note, his father didn’t seem in the least bit angry, if anything he seemed proud. So he sat down on the sofa and tried not to dwell too much on his stinging backside.

“I liked learning about the Polyjuice potion and the Wiggentree bark. But my favorite part was watching you make that potion, I learned a lot watching you and I liked being in the potions lab.”

“Well, hopefully Ms. Cloutier will be better soon, but I imagine there might be other opportunities to do some potions work with me if you’re interested. And you did very well today following my instructions. With the exception of one or two minor slip-ups, I was overall quite pleased. You’ve proven that you are capable of being trusted to accompany me in the lab, so I imagine there will be more opportunities for you to do so in future.”

Soren blushed slightly at the compliment, and the fact that his father hadn’t brought up his deplorable attitude at the end of the session. Although the man was incredibly strict, Soren did appreciate that once something had been dealt with, he didn’t usually bring it up again. 

“Thank you, father. I’ll do even better next time, I promise. I want to learn everything from you! Then one day I can be the best at potions, justlike you.”

“I am confident that with enough hard work, you will be an exceptional potions student. You have plenty of time.”

Just then, Tinny arrived with a pop, tea service in hand. He set it down on the table and looked at Snape. “Yous has a letter that came by owl, Lord Kent.”

“Oh?” Snape raised an eyebrow. “From whom?” 

“Harry Potter,” Tinny replied, handing him the note. 

Snape opened the letter and read through the familiar chicken scratch hand-writing, realizing that it hadn’t improved at all since the man was a first year. He skimmed through it quickly before closing it and tucking it into his pocket. “Thank you, Tinny.”

The house elf nodded and disappeared with a small pop.

Soren grabbed a chocolate biscuit and dipped it in his tea while he waited patiently to see if his father would share any news. When several seconds ticked by, and he couldn’t stand it anymore, he finally asked. “What did Mr. Potter say, father? Is he coming to visit again soon?”

Snape arched a brow over the top of his teacup, taking his time to savor and enjoy the delicious Darjeeling he’d chosen for his afternoon selection. He pulled the letter out of his pocket and carefully looked at the outside of the letter. “I don’t believe this letter is addressed to you, Soren. So surely you realize that it’s contents are none of your concern.”

“Oh,” Soren said, a slight blush creeping up his neck. “Sorry, father.”

“It is rude to pry into other people’s business. If there is something I wish to share, I will do so, unsolicited. You should know better, Soren.”

“Yes, father…I was just hoping he’d come visit again soon as I can show him the maze!”

Tucking the letter back into his jacket, Snape set down his tea and took a deep breath. “Yes, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about that. I am going to ask you not to bring the maze up again in front of Mr. Potter.”

“Why?” Soren looked confused. “It’s one of my favorite things here. I think he’d really love it, just like me and Ms. Cloutier! I want to show him how fast I’m getting!”

“Ms. Cloutier and me,” he corrected. “And I know you enjoy it very much, but it is complicated…” Snape took a moment to consider how best to explain it. “You see, when Mr. Potter was a boy, something quite terrible happened to him in a maze. Even though it has been many years, sometimes people still carry bad memories that can make them feel sad or scared. Even though the maze is fun and full of joy for you, it might cause Mr. Potter to have some very difficult feelings, and we do not wish to put him in a circumstance where he either feels uncomfortable or is reminded of his traumatic memories. Can you understand that?”

Snape hoped he hadn’t said too much, but he felt he had to be honest with the boy, there was no use in continuing to dance around the issue, and sooner or later he knew Soren would pressure Harry, and knowing the man the way he did, Harry was unlikely to refuse Soren, putting him in a terrible situation that could lead to all kinds of post-traumatic flashbacks, panic attacks, and nightmares. Something neither of them needed to deal with. 

A look of understanding and sympathy came across Soren’s face. “Oh…that’s really sad, father. I thought you just didn’t want me to bother him because he’s too busy. Did he get hurt in a maze? What happened?”

“That,” Snape said sharply, “is certainly not any of your business. If one day, Mr. Potter chooses to tell you himself, that is up to him. But you are not to ever ask him about it or bring it up, or mention the maze again in his presence. It would be insensitive and cruel. Is that clear?”

“Yes, father, I won’t. I wouldn’t want to do anything to make Mr. Potter feel bad, he’s always nice to me…do I need to be afraid to go in the maze? Can it hurt me too?”

Snapes heart ached with the innocent question. “Not at all, Soren. I built that maze to be something special, meant to be enjoyed. I used to walk in it all of the time before you and Ms. Cloutier arrived. It is meant to be a place you can wander and think and… ‘unwind’…” Snape smirked to himself for that unintentional play on words. “But no, Soren, you have nothing to worry about whatsoever. I am glad that you enjoy the maze, and you should continue to do so.”

Soren smiled. “I really want you to do the maze with me, father. Then you can show me all of the tricks so I can beat Ms. Cloutier!” He reached for his third cookie, hoping his father hadn’t noticed. 

“Uh uh uh,” Snape shook his head. “Put that back, young man. You know you’re only meant to have two biscuits with your tea.” He reached toward the little boy's hand and snatched the McVittie’s out of it, giving him a disapproving look. “It hasn’t been fifteen minutes since you’ve had your bottom smacked, and already you’re up to no good. Do you honestly think I won’t punish you again? You know the rules, Soren. And you know how I feel about deceit.”

Soren’s face and ears burned red with shame. “I wasn’t really paying attention, father, I didn’t mean to take a third one.”

Now the man’s face went into a deep scowl. “Do not make it worse by lying to me right now, Soren. If you want to save yourself another trip over my knee, you will be honest, apologize, and convince me that you have taken this lesson to heart without the need for additional punishment.” 

“I’m sorry, father. I was just enjoying having tea with you and I didn’t think you would notice. I wasn’t trying to be dishonest. I know the rules are two biscuits only, and I promise I won’t try to do that again. I promise.” Soren had small tears in his eyes now, but not because he was worried about being punished, but because he felt terrible that he’d let his father down over something so stupid. He’d given in to a normal, childish impulse, he hadn’t meant to deceive his father.

“There’s no reason to be upset. But I expect better of you, Soren. And do not ever, ever lie to me over something so silly. If you make a mistake, just acknowledge it. I will always be far more lenient with you if you admit it straight away and apologize. I cannot stand being lied to, so just know that if you are ever blatantly dishonest with me, I will punish you far more severely than I would otherwise.”

Soren nodded his head. “I’m really sorry father. I wasn’t trying to be naughty. I promise.” A few tears slid down his face. 

“Oh for Merlin’s sake,” Snape said, pulling out a handkerchief. “Come here, Soren.”

Soren reluctantly slid off the couch, hesitating as he walked until his father pulled him in between his knees. 

“That’s enough. There’s no reason for tears. You’re a child, I fully expect that you will do silly things without thinking. However, I want you to clearly understand that there’s a difference between being a bit naughty, and lying about it. It is the lying that truly bothers me. I am not angry and you’re not in trouble. This time. But I want to be clear, it will always be in your best interest to be honest and apologize. Always. I will be extremely angry and disappointed if you lie to me. And I promise you, I will always find out if you’ve been lying and it is never worth it. Do you understand?”

The guilt that had been simmering under the surface burst out of him and Soren started sobbing. “I’m sorry, father! I didn’t mean to lie to you!”

Snape gave him a quizzical look. “Soren, enough. Take a deep breath, there is absolutely no reason to get worked up over this. Nothing happened. I am not angry. You haven’t done anything to warrant this kind of upset.” He pulled the boy in closer and wiped the tears and snot off of his face. “Take a deep breath.”

Soren sobbed for another few seconds before he stopped and took a deep breath, his exhale stuttering slightly. 

“Again. We’re going to keep breathing until you calm down. Now slow deep breaths in…and out…yes, just like that. Again.” 

Together they took several more deep breaths, Snape keeping two steadying hands on the boy the whole time. When he was sure Soren had calmed down, he wiped his face one more time before lifting his chin up with his thumb and forefingers. “Would you care to explain what got you so worked up? You know you are not in trouble, right?”

Soren nodded his head. “Yes, father. I don’t know…” A part of Soren wanted to come clean, tell him all about the wand, the fire, how Ms. Cloutier had taken the blame for him, but his father was giving him such kind eyes right now, he didn’t have the guts. Not to mention, he didn’t want to get Ms. Cloutier in trouble. He pushed any thoughts of confession far out of his mind. “I just felt bad that I made you disappointed. I wanted to be really good today and I already got in trouble once, and then I felt bad because I got in trouble again even though I was trying really hard to be good, I really was.” 

His lower lip started to quiver and more tears threatened to fall. 

“Stop that right now,” Snape said, in a kind but commanding voice. “No more tears. I am not disappointed in you. I was not disappointed in you earlier, either. I punished you because you had been pushing on that boundary all day and you needed to get your attitude under control. You are seven years old, Soren, I fully expect you to have moments where you do something naughty, or you give me cheek and you need to be quickly corrected and steered back in line. That is my job as your father. It doesn’t mean you’re not a good boy. It certainly doesn’t change the way I feel about you. This is why I tell you, once you’ve been punished, it is over, there is a clean slate, we move on. You do not need to hold onto guilt, shame, feelings of sadness. Do you understand?”

Soren nodded his head and whispered, “Yes, father.”

“Overall, you are a good boy. I was very pleased with your focus and work today, and whilst aiming for perfection is admirable, I do not expect that of you. That doesn’t mean there won’t be consequences when you make mistakes, but it means we deal with them and get back on track and try not to repeat them. It doesn’t change how I feel about you or what kind of person you are. Now then, are you all done with the tears?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Good.” With one final wipe of the little boy’s face, Snape banished the handkerchief, resting a gentle hand on Soren’s shoulder. ”Then sit down, finish your tea and then you can either take a rest or go outside and play with Tinny.”

Soren was tempted to throw his arms around his father and give him a hug, but he let go of that impulse almost as quickly as it came.

“Now let’s try and enjoy the rest of our tea in peace.” Snape sent him on his way with a pat on the head. “We’ve had quite enough hysterics for one day.”

A few minutes ticked by when Snape set his cup down. “How would you feel about another little boy your age coming to play for a bit tomorrow?”

“A boy coming here? To play with me?!” Soren was so excited he nearly jumped off the couch. He bounced slightly on his cushion and clapped his hands. “Yes, please, father! Who is it! When are they coming? Is he allowed to play in the maze with me?”

“We’ll have to make arrangements, but Mr. Potter has a godson about your age, and he offered to bring him over if that is acceptable to you.”

“Please please please, father!!! Can he stay over? Will he bring toys? When is he coming?”

“Take a breath, Soren, and don’t get overexcited. Nothing has been planned yet, but his name is Teddy. He is 6.5, so not quite 7, but close enough. And yes, you may play with him in the garden and the maze. I will tell Mr. Potter that he is welcome to bring over one or two simple things you can play with together, if he would like.”

“Does he have a broom?” Soren asked with a huge grin.

“I wouldn’t know. But what I’m absolutely certain of is that you will not be getting on any broom until you are well past the age of 11. So whether Teddy has one or not, it makes no difference as far as you’re concerned.” Snape gave him a knowing look. 

“Oh, well, we’ll see.”

“I beg your pardon?” Both of Snape’s eyebrows flew up in response.

“I’m going to ask him tomorrow if he has a broom. If he says yes, then maybe after my next birthday he can bring it over.”

“Are your ears functional, little boy? I just told you, no broom before you go off to Hogwarts. You will learn to fly there like most other magical children. That’s the end of the discussion.”

“Yes, sir.” Soren was so excited there was nothing that could dampen his mood now. “Can I show him my classroom?”

“I suppose, if he’s interested. It’s up to you. Let’s not get too ahead of ourselves, I need to make arrangements with Mr. Potter.”

“This is going to be so much fun! I’m going to show him the maze and the gardens. Maybe we can play hide and seek! Does he have a dog?”

“No idea. I know about as much as you do about the boy.”

“Oh. Can we get a dog?”

Snape wrinkled his forehead. “Excuse me? Where on earth did that come from?”

Soren shrugged. “I’ve been thinking we should get a puppy. Then I could play with him and I wouldn’t feel so lonely or bored all the time.”

“There’s absolutely no excuse to be lonely or bored in this house. You have plenty of enriching things you can do to make use of your time. There’s an entire library with tens of thousands of books— adventure stories, poems, and knowledge of every kind. Additionally, you also have vast gardens you can explore, and plenty of things you can learn about if you were so inclined. And you have Ms. Cloutier and myself here with you constantly, I don’t see how you could possibly be lonely or bored. I, for one, would be thrilled to be either of those things at the moment.”

“But I don’t have anyone to play with. Tinny doesn’t count, he’s just a house elf. I want a real friend…or a puppy.”

“We’re not getting a puppy, Soren. My life is chaotic enough with one untrained feral creature in the house, I couldn’t possibly keep my sanity if you added another one.”

“Please father? It would be so much fun. I could train him myself and he could sleep on my bed and keep me cozy and warm. And we could play in the garden together!”

“You’ve lost your mind if you think I’d entertain any of that for a single second. First of all, I can’t even get you to follow directions, but you expect me to believe you have the ability to train a dog? It’s laughable. And yes, I’m sure you and this fictional dog would enjoy far too much time playing around in the gardens, destroying my plants and flowers when he’s not inside chewing up furniture and tearing my house to pieces. It’s absurd, Soren, and the answer is unequivocally ‘no.’ Now can you focus on the issue at hand?” Snape shook his head and looked up at the mantle clock, counting the hours until it would be an acceptable enough time to pour himself a brandy. 

“Oh, right! Teddy! Well, maybe if Teddy has a dog then—“

“Don’t. Even. Think. About. It.” Snape said loudly, putting his hand up and closing his eyes. “If you say the word ‘dog’ one more time, you will spend the rest of the evening in your room, writing it over and over again until you’re so sick of it, you never say it out loud again. And I don’t care if Teddy has an entire menagerie at home, he is not allowed to bring an animal to our home. Ever.”

Soren scowled slightly, but knew that he was getting close to pushing his father over the edge, and he had no desire to find himself over his knee for a second time today. His father was no fun at all. No brooms. No animals. So boring. 

“I’m sure you and Teddy will find plenty to do in the manor, and if you get along, perhaps he will come back again another time. Let’s take it one step at a time.”

“Does Teddy go to real school or does he have a governess like me?” Soren asked, curious. 

“I wouldn’t have a clue. But I’m sure you can ask him.”

“Maybe he can come here and go to school with me! Ms. Cloutier can teach both of us and then I can have a friend at school too!” 

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves, Soren. Besides, I hired Ms. Cloutier to teach you. It is not her job to educate every orphan that comes stumbling through the manor. Now why don’t you go outside and run off some of this energy. Those two biscuits were clearly more than enough sugar, you’re practical all bouncing off the walls. Up you get!” Snape clapped twice and stood, reaching over and lifting the boy onto his feet before propelling him toward the door. “Out you go!”

“Wait!” Soren said, turning around. “Can I go to the loo, first?”

“Yes, of course. And don’t forget to wash your hands and face, you have chocolate everywhere. And while you’re at it, change out of your school clothes and into your play clothes, there’s no reason to get those dirty.”

Soren walked to the stairs and then sprinted up them, making a bee-line to his room. He took off his school ‘uniform’- a pair of gray short pants, black knee socks, a white Oxford shirt, a green and gold tie, and a navy blazer emblazened with the Kent family crest. Normally Marie or Tinny would put his clothes back in the wardrobe with quick swish of their wands, but he just tossed them inside for now. He grabbed out a pair of corduroy trousers and a long-sleeved shirt and pulled on his trainers. 

Before he left the room, he reached into his bag in the wardrobe and pulled out what he really came up for—his tiny little golden ground snitch. It was a toy that Ms. Cloutier had gotten him to play with. It only hovered a few feet above the ground, but it was fun to chase around the garden, and it gave him something to do when he was alone. He shoved it in his pocket before running his hands quickly under the bathroom sink and wiping his face and hands with a towel, chocolate smearing off onto the cloth. 

He bolted down the stairs as quickly as he’d gone up them, excited to go out and play. He knew better than to run across the parlor, but he walked as fast as he could without incurring the wrath of his father who was constantly yelling at him not to run in the house. “Bye, father! I’m going outside!”

“Stay on the ground. No tree climbing, no ridiculous stunts. I’ve had enough drama these past few days to last me quite a while. Tinny will bring you in when it is reading time.” Snape had barely finished his last sentence when the slam of the back door. 

Snape took a long deep breath, snagged another chocolate biscuit, and then headed down to the dungeon to bottle his hydration potion before returning to check on Marie. 

Chapter Text

After giving the hydration potion a final stir, Snape carefully bottled it into several small silver vials, slipping one into his frock coat before making his way up two flights of stairs to the West wing. 

It was still late afternoon, but he didn’t want to disturb Marie if she was sleeping. He paused and listened carefully outside of her door before he lifted his hand to knock, hearing what was obviously the sound of the wooden floorboards creaking as she moved across the room. Perturbed, he wrapped his knuckles authoritatively on the door, struggling to control his impulse to barge in and scold her harshly, but recognizing it would be more than unprofessional if he did anything besides wait politely for her to respond and invite him in.

After his knock, he heard the unmistakable sounds of her footsteps shuffling back across the floor followed by two small thuds as she abandoned her slippers and then the low whine of the bed frame as she hopped back into it. A few more seconds passed before he heard a breathless “Come in.”

He opened the door, a deep scowl on his face. “Out of bed, were we?”

“Lord Kent,” she said, still looking wan and frail, but a guilty flush on her cheeks as she labored slightly to breathe, the rush of scurrying back into bed clearly taking a toll on her in her weakened state. 

Snape crossed his arms and stared down at her as he took slow, deliberate steps toward her bed, his displeasure evident. “What was so important you felt the need to defy my request? I thought I made it abundantly clear that should you need to get up for any reason, you were to call for Tinny.”

Marie’s ears burned red. “I didn’t want to bother Tinny. I just needed something quickly from my wardrobe. Besides, I’m feeling better.” Actually she was feeling horrible, and it had taken every last drop of her strength (and at least two episodes of near fainting) before she made it to the wardrobe…but of course she would never admit that. 

“Isn’t that why you have a wand? If you’re too weak to use it, you’re far too weak to be gallivanting out of bed.” Snape glanced at the wand on her bedside table, where it had laid untouched for the past two days. 

The truth was, Marie had tried using Soren’s wand on several occasions and it was fickle at the best of times, disastrous almost always. The damn thing had nearly blasted her hand off twice, and it refused even the most basic spells despite her stubborn insistence. She’d heard spruce could be an impossible wood to work with, and she wasn’t about to lose her fingers to continue trying. But she’d thankfully had the foresight to stash her own wand away days ago, not wanting to mistakenly use the wrong one when she was out of sorts, even if it was making life exceptionally difficult. “I thought it might be good to stretch my legs a bit. You know, prevention of blood clots and all.”

With a sneer, Snape flicked his wand a few times, tidying up her room slightly, shutting the wardrobe door, rearranging her blankets, and fluffing her pillows. He finished by pointing at the slippers that had been abandoned one by one in the middle of the floor, flicking his wand a few more times until they picked themselves up, straightened themselves out and then disappeared underneath the side of her bed where no one would trip on them. Satisfied, he turned to Marie, staring into her eyes as he chastised her. “Do not. Get up. Unassisted. Again.”

“I won’t,” she said, unable to keep his eye contact. Although she hadn’t had a chance to find the book she was looking for when she heard him knock, she’d have to wait until he left to try again. If she could manage it. The fruitless jaunt had taken far more out of her than she’d expected and even she had to admit she wasn’t well enough to get up. 

Snape reached down and took her wrist, feeling for her pulse which he determined was still quite weak and thready, and far more rapid than it should be. His other hand flew up to her forehead, where her porcelain skin was a tad clammy, but cool. Her eyes glistened a bit more than they had earlier, but her lips still looked extremely dry and her color was a bit off. When he glanced at the jug of water, it was noticeably less full, but he still wasn’t satisfied. 

From his pocket, he pulled the silver vial, offering it to her gently. “I’m concerned you are still dehydrated so I’ve made you this rehydration potion. It should help you catch up much more quickly, although you should still continue to drink plenty of fluids.”

“Thank you,” she smiled, taking the vial. “Perhaps I’ll see how I’m feeling this evening.”

“Perhaps you should take it now, Ms. Cloutier. Have you had anything besides water and a spot of tea? A cup of broth? Something with some electrolytes or some substance?”

“Not yet…” 

“Then it seems unwise to delay it. This is freshly brewed by my own hand, I am confident you will feel much better after you take it.” He phrased it as a helpful suggestion but his tone was insistent.

Marie didn’t have the energy to argue, so she put the vial to her lips and swigged it. It wasn’t entirely unpleasant; she could taste some sweetness from the ginger, mint, and chamomile, but it left an odd metallic taste on her tongue, as though she had a mouth full of copper pennies or had been drinking from a garden hose.

He gave a slight nod of approval and placed the empty vial back into his coat. 

Within seconds, Marie could feel the moisture returning to her mouth which had been parched for days, and her throat immediately soothed. The dull headache that had been plaguing her started to fade and he was right, she immediately felt much better. She had no idea just how dehydrated she’d been until the potion started to take effect. “I’m feeling better already, thank you.”

“You should continue to improve over the next several hours, but the more you can drink, the more robust the hydration effect of the potion will be.” Snape grabbed the jug and used his wand to refill it with cool water before pouring some into the empty glass and placing it in her hand. “May I ask Tinny to bring you something small to eat? Some soup or broth?”

Marie hesitated for a moment. “Not right now. Maybe for supper, I’ll try a light soup. I’ll ask Tinny if I need anything. I promise.”

“I would recommend that you do,” Snape said, matter of factly. “Is there anything I can get for you before I leave? Something from your wardrobe, perhaps?” He raised a disapproving eyebrow.

“No thanks. I’m good for now.” She attempted to smile at him but was met with a stern look. 

“You may feel a burst of energy after that potion, but you haven’t eaten properly in days, your body is still recovering from pneumonia, and you are clearly still in a languid state. I know you value your independence, but I mean it, Ms. Cloutier, I do not want you to get up unassisted and faint again or have a fall. If you need anything- you will call for Tinny. Have I made myself clear?”

“Yes, of course. I will.”

Snape took another moment to give her one of his signature “you’d better mind me” looks and she responded with a weak smile. 

“Very well. Then take rest, continue to hydrate, and I shall check in on you after supper.”

“Thank you,” Marie said, settling back into her bed and laying down. 

After the door clicked closed, Marie closed her eyes and stilled for several minutes as she listened intently to the sounds of his boots striking the stone floor, waiting for them to fade down the hall until they’d disappeared down the stairs. He’s gone.

She had a trashy romance novel she’d never be caught dead with on her bedside table, but she was dying to read it, although it was currently stashed away deep in her wardrobe.  It was a book she’d picked up on a whim the last time she was in town and now that she’d read through all of the books she’d taken out of Lord Kent’s library (some more than others), she was ready to indulge in something a bit less…classy. She didn’t often read romance novels, but there was something about this book that had captured her fancy and she’d bought it on impulse, the surly and arrogant Duke on the cover reminding her somewhat of Lord Kent.

Maybe just ask Tinny to get it. You promised you wouldn’t get up. Marie debated internally. She knew Tinny wouldn’t have a clue what it was, but still, it seemed silly to ask for something so trivial. But she wanted to try her best to keep her promise, so instead she let out a deep sigh and grabbed the glass of water on her bedside, taking several large sips before settling in for another nap. 

When she woke up nearly two hours later, her bladder was bursting for the first time in days. The hydration potion was obviously working— that and the fact that Lord Kent had practically forced several liters of water down her throat all day. She felt ridiculous asking Tinny to help her to the loo, she wasn’t completely incapacitated. In fact she really did feel so much better now and she was sure she’d have no issues walking a dozen or so paces to the loo.

She sat up and let her feet dangle over the edge of the bed, giving herself a moment to equilibrate before she slid her feet down to the floor. With her right hand on the bedpost, she braced herself as she took a step toward the washroom. She was just about to take another step when she felt an enormous whack across her backside. 

“What the fuck?” 

Even through her dressing gown and pajamas, it hurt! But she’d been so stunned that before she could turn her head and figure out what was going on, she felt another hard whack in the same place. “Ow!” she screamed,”Dammit!” throwing her hands back frantically and turning her head sharply to see her bedroom slipper, hovering in the air ready to swing again. That son of a bitch, he charmed it!! With her hands protecting her bum, she scowled angrily at it, but before she could do anything else, the slipper struck again, this time smacking her painfully on the back of her thigh eliciting another high-pitched outburst “Jesus fuck, that hurts! I get it, I’m going!!”

The slipper had obviously been charmed to smack her as long as she was out of bed, so in an act of pure desperation, she turned and threw herself face forward onto the end of her bed, grabbing onto her bedsheets and lifting her legs, hoping the cursed thing would stop as soon as her feet were off the floor. Evil fucking bastard, how dare he! She frantically crawled up onto the mattress just as the blasted slipper gave her one more resounding crack across both cheeks before dropping to the floor and tucking itself back under the bed as though it were merely an innocent piece of sheepskin and rubber rather than a weapon of mass destruction. More like ass destruction!

Marie growled angrily into the pillow as she reached back to furiously rub her bum, which was now stinging and throbbing quite harshly. Her face burned red, and she was just glad no one was there to witness what had no doubt been a ridiculous display on her part, her hair now even more disheveled, her bed clothes all over the place as she’d grabbed and clawed at them for dear life as she’d propelled herself toward her pillows in a vain attempt to avoid that final blow. 

She took a minute just to lay there pathetically and catch her breath, still in shock that she’d just been attacked by her own freaking slipper. It took her a minute of rubbing furiously before she remembered she still needed to use the loo and her desperation to pee was quickly overtaking the attention from her burning backside. Deciding there was no way she had the energy to fight with a goddamn shoe—especially without her wand— she sat back up in bed, attempting to regain whatever was left of her dignity as she composed herself. After a deep breath, and a futile attempt to smooth down her hair, she reluctantly called for Tinny, silently cursing while she nursed a sore backside and a simmering grudge against both her traitorous footwear and her sadistic employer. It was easily the most indignant she’d felt in days, although she would rather die than admit to Lord Kent that she’d been smacked by a charmed shoe, especially since she’d promised she wouldn’t step a foot out of bed without Tinny. There was no way she would give him the satisfaction. 

After finally relieving herself—Marie made the most of having Tinny there to help. By the time she finally crawled back into bed, she was feeling infinitely more fresh. She’d asked Tinny to help her with a quick washing spell and the eager house elf had gone out of his way to put her in a new set of pajamas and fresh sheets. She brushed her teeth and had Tinny help her spell her hair into an elegant up-do before she settled back into bed with her scandalous romance novel (which she had finally asked Tinny to fetch for her, her desperation to read it outweighing her embarrassment). But Tinny was happy to help and enthusiastically pampered her and took care of her every need before tucking her back into bed. 

And as much as Marie hated to admit it, the few smacks of the slipper had left a pleasant warmth and tingle in her backside, fueling far more depraved thoughts of Lord Kent than she knew what to do with. What is wrong with you, Marie!! The man is a brute! A control-freak! But she couldn’t help it, she kept imagining what it would be like if he’d been the one to catch her out of bed, scolding her and delivering the smacks himself. The thought both humiliated her and turned her on, further confusing her. She’d always thought of herself as a strong, independent woman, but she was intoxicated by his authority and his dominant personality. It went against everything she believed in, but her body betrayed her, and it was becoming harder to deny. 

“UGHHH,” she let out an exasperated sigh as she picked up her book, failing to ignore the new feelings brewing inside of her as she indulged in a romance story of the villainous Duke and the naughty maid. 

Down in the parlor, Snape was almost certain he’d heard a muffled squeal or two coming from Marie’s room and he smirked to himself wondering if she’d encountered the little charm he’d left as he’d tidied her room. Good, perhaps now she’ll think twice before ignoring my directives. He poured himself a cup of tea, only disappointed that the slipper was having all of the fun. 

Many hours later, Marie woke to a soft knock on her door. 

“Come in” she said, pushing herself up in bed, slightly disoriented and groggy but feeling miles better than she had in days. That rehydration potion had been a real winner. 

She saw the dark locks appear through a small crack in the door. “It’s me, Ms. Cloutier,” a little voice whispered before he poked his head in, two big brown eyes shining in the dim light of her bedside lamp. 

Marie pushed herself up into a seated position, her back against the headboard. “Come in, Soren. It’s OK.”

He was in his pajamas, and tiptoed quietly toward her bed, climbing onto the foot of it after she patted the mattress. “I’ve been really worried about you. Are you all better now?”

“I’m doing much better, thank you. I’m just trying to get my strength back, but hopefully by tomorrow I’ll be nearly back to normal. Your father brewed me some special potions, so that is helping a lot.”

Soren beamed. “He let me come down to the dungeon today and watch him brew. It was fun. He said I can be really good at potions one day if I keep working hard, so I’m going to learn everything.”

Marie reached out and ran her hand gently over his hair and down his back affectionately. “That’s wonderful. Tell me all about your day. I’ve missed you.”

Soren scooted closer, leaning into her touches and desperate for her affection. “Father taught me in the classroom in the morning and then we went over potion ingredients. He made me sit at my desk the whole time but he promised if I behaved I could go to the potions lab in the afternoon so I tried really hard. Then he asked me about Wiggentree bark and I remembered it from that day we were in the garden! Did you know that it can be used to change people into someone else? That’s cuz it has properties of transformation. And the fluxweed tells it how long to last, but only if it is picked at the full moon.”

“That’s right! What a wonderful memory you have, Soren. I’m so proud of you! So he wasn’t too tough on you, then?”

“He had a lot of rules and he asked me a lot of questions, but it was OK.” Soren shrugged but sat up, putting his shoulders back proudly. “I did pretty good. After lunch we went to the potions lab and he made me sit on a stool and he said I couldn’t move or talk or get up. But I accidentally talked once and he got a little mad but he still let me stay. And then he brewed a hydration potion and I got to watch the whole thing! And he said since I did a good job following directions that maybe I can come back again another time, but only when he’s there.”

“Sounds like you had a very good day, I’m so glad.”

“Mostly it was good, except when he smacked me.”

“Oh no! What happened?” Marie gave him a sympathetic look, particularly after her little run-in with the slipper, reflexively putting a soothing hand on his back wanting to give him a big cuddle. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah, I was just mad cuz I wanted to draw you a picture and make you a card but I didn’t have anything to draw with. And then father kept trying to hold my hand to go up the stairs when I told him I could do it myself. And then he told me to mind my tone, but I didn’t.” Soren slumped down a bit, looking slightly ashamed, picking at one of his nails. 

“Poor baby, I’m so sorry.” Marie leaned in to give him a hug but he pulled away.

“I’m not a baby!” Soren said, slightly indignant as he scrunched up his face. “It didn’t even hurt, I didn’t even cry.” It wasn’t entirely true, it had stung quite a bit at the time, but he didn’t want to make a big deal about it. Besides, he’d had a really good day otherwise, and after all of the pleasant time they spent together, he felt closer to his father than he ever had. He was finally starting to feel like maybe his father did care for him, even if he was a harsh and difficult man.

“You know it’s perfectly alright to cry, Soren. You should always feel free to express your emotions. Are you feeling OK now?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Soren shrugged it off, although he was glad to have the sympathy, he didn’t want to dwell on it. “Then I went outside and played with my snitch you gave me and then we had dinner and father read me some of the Oliver Twist book and put me to bed. I tried to sleep, but I couldn’t.” Soren leaned gently against her. “Just don’t tell father, he told me I could see you when you were better. But I really missed you a lot.”

“What time is it?” Marie panicked slightly as she realized it must be much later than she realized and grabbed her bedside clock. “Oh Soren, it’s after ten, you should be asleep by now! It is well past your bedtime! You’ve already been in trouble once today, you don’t want your father to catch you out of bed, I don’t think he would be very pleased!” Marie gave him a quick hug before shooing him off the bed. “Go on, back to bed. I’ll see you tomorrow!”

“But I can’t sleep!” Soren whined, refusing to budge, dodging her hands as she attempted to pick him up and put him back on the floor. “I want to stay with you. Pleeeeaaassse?”

“Soren, you can’t, my darling. You need to sleep in your own bed, not to mention I’m still recovering from pneumonia, I don’t want to get you ill. What’s going on, did you have a bad dream? Why can’t you sleep? Are you upset about something?”

“I don’t know…I missed you and I wanted to see if you are OK…and I’m nervous.” He snuggled up next to her, putting his arms around her waist and leaning into her chest.

“Nervous about what? You don’t need to worry about me, I’m going to be absolutely fine.” Marie thought back on her earlier conversation with Lord Kent, and she felt terrible that Soren had been so triggered by her fainting and being sick. She would have a proper conversation with him later, but for now she was exhausted and the last thing she wanted was for Soren to get caught out of bed and into trouble again. 

“Harry is going to bring his godson Teddy to come play with me tomorrow. Maybe.”

“That sounds wonderful! There’s nothing to be nervous about, you’ll have so much fun!” She gave him a squeeze and rubbed his arm gently. 

“I don’t know…what if he doesn’t like me? Or he gets bored because I don’t have that much fun toys to play with.”

Marie had to agree with him there, she really wished she could convince Lord Kent that Soren would be so much happier with a few things to play with, but he was still insisting he didn’t want to “spoil” the boy, and that he never had any toys growing up and instead he spent his time reading and learning and doing “useful” things with his time. 

“Well, first I can tell you that you have nothing to worry about, you’re a fun, smart, charming boy and everyone just adores you, and I’m sure Teddy will too. And you two will find plenty of fun things to do in the garden. There’s absolutely nothing to worry about. Now go back to bed and try to sleep, you want to be well-rested tomorrow when he comes to play!”

Soren nodded his head. “OK. Goodnight, Ms. Cloutier,” the boy said sweetly, turning toward her to give her a hug.

“Goodnight, Soren.” She gave him a hug and placed a small kiss on his forehead before sending him off with a small pat on the back. “And stay in bed!!”

The little boy disappeared back through the door, shutting it gently with the faintest “click.”

Marie refilled her glass of water and took several long sips before she felt her body calling her back to sleep. She laid back down and was asleep within minutes.

Snape awoke early, and since it was Saturday morning, and Marie was still recuperating in her room, he decided to let Soren sleep in while he enjoyed his tea and the rare bit of time to himself. He was scribbling some notes on a piece of parchment when a small envelope popped through the floo. With the reflexes of a cat, he reached out and snatched the letter out of thin air, setting his tea down to open and read it. 

I’ll stop by with Teddy after lunch so the boys can play. We’ll plan to be there around 2pm if that works. If not, please let me know, and we’ll make other arrangements.

—HP

Snape longed for a full day to himself, and as much as he loathed having guests of any kind, particularly Potter and what he surmised was likely another very irritating child, he would tolerate it for Soren’s sake. He was sure the boy was going stir crazy, and maybe it would keep Soren out of his hair for a few hours while he did some work. And perhaps if he played his cards right, it might mean he’d be able to pawn the boy off for a few hours here and there in the future. Fingers crossed. 

He folded the note up and tossed it into the fire, staring at the edges glowing bright orange as the paper was consumed by flames and turned into ashes. He took a deep breath, trying not to let his mind swirl with unimportant thoughts, there was far too much to do.

With a quick glance up at the mantle clock, he decided to luxuriate in his solitude for another fifteen minutes before he went upstairs to wake his son, no doubt initiating what would be yet another chaotic day in the manor. 

As was his custom for the last few days, Snape stopped by Marie’s room on his way to get Soren. He knocked gently, but with enough authority that Marie had no doubt who was at her door. 

“Come in!”

Snape could tell from her voice that she was feeling better, there was a sprightly energy in her voice he hadn’t heard in days, so he hoped that meant she was finally on the mend. 

When he came through the door, he was surprised to see her sitting up, in what appeared to be a clean set of pajamas and a dressing gown, having a cup of tea with a book spread out on her lap, which she quickly closed and stuck under her pillow. Interesting.

“Good morning, Ms. Cloutier, I take it you’re feeling better today?” 

“Yes, thank you. So much better.”

He glanced over to see that the jug of water he’d left was suitably devoid of contents. “And I see you finally decided to heed my instructions and stay hydrated, that makes a world of difference when one is recovering from fever.”

Marie gave him a cheeky look. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Lord Kent, I always follow your directions to the letter!” 

Snape raised an eyebrow, keeping his face stern, but with the tiniest hint of an upturn in his lip, pleased that she was well enough to have a bit of banter. “If only that were true, my life would be infinitely less complicated.”

“And probably a bit boring, too, don’t you think?” She smiled at him in earnest now, her eyes sparkling with life again. 

“I can assure you I would much rather be bored than having to spend my time convincing my stubborn chit of a governess to drink more fluids before she ends up in St. Mungos. Honestly, Ms. Cloutier, you were on the brink of kidney failure. I did not appreciate having to coax every drop of water into your mouth. You’re incorrigible.”

“You didn’t enjoy it just a little bit?” She prodded him, gently, hoping she hadn’t gone too far, she could tell he was in a good mood this morning, and she’d been waiting to see him since her thoughts had been consumed by him all night. The romance novel having done little to quell her vivid imagination.

“I can think of many many ways I’d rather spend my time, although it is quite clear that you’ve relished being doted on. Just know that if you ever do that again, next time I will spell the water directly into your stomach and be done with it. There are far better ways of getting my attention than attempting to put yourself into organ failure.”

Snape might be acting like he was completely irritated, but truthfully there was a part of him that had enjoyed nursing her back to health, even if he would never admit it. The timing had been far from convenient, and of course he had been genuinely worried about her at several points along the way, but it had been a long time since he’d felt needed and useful in that way. 

But Marie wasn’t stupid either, she knew there was a part of him that must care about her on some deeper level; he’d come to check on her constantly through the day and night, holding her gently and helping her take small sips of water when she was at her most unwell. Not to mention he’d made several potions just for her. Even as a child she couldn’t remember having that much attention and focus on her, and it felt nice having someone look after her for a change. 

“Well, thank you. I really do appreciate everything you’ve done for me. And I promise I’ll do my best not to get sick ever again,” she joked. “Naughty, naughty Marie, how dare you come down with pneumonia! You should be ashamed!” She smacked her own hand softly several times as she mocked a stern tone. 

“You are clearly feeling much better if you’re being that cheeky. And while I know you cannot help being sick, we are not done discussing the poor decisions and dreadful behavior that led up to that.” He glared down at her. “And I can promise you, if it were up to me, you’d get a fair bit more than a few little pats on the hand.”

Marie turned bright red and picked up her cup of tea, unable to make eye contact with him as his eyes bored into her with a look that almost dared her to come up with a sassy response. But as usual, he’d left her flustered and speechless.

“Now then, since you seem to be in a much more…accommodating mood today, you will stay here, rest, read, and finish healing. Tinny will bring you your meals, which you will eat. You may feel full of energy now, but I assure you that your constitution is weak, and if you push yourself too much, you’ll end up back where you were yesterday and none of us have the time for that. Soren and I will spend the morning reading and perhaps learning about some plants in the garden, and this afternoon he will have a playmate join him for some fresh air and recreation.”

“Oh great! So Teddy is coming after all!,” Marie said, before realizing she shouldn’t have said anything. Dammit, Marie!! 

Snape gave her a quizzical look. “I beg your pardon? How could you possibly know that?”

Shit, Marie. Don’t get poor Soren into trouble!! Think of something! Marie forced a small coughing fit before reaching for what was now an empty glass of water, putting her hand out while she thought of something to say.

“Are you alright? Do you need another potion for your cough?” Snape said, suitably concerned. 

Marie coughed again and shook her head before motioning for her water glass, which Snape quickly refilled before handing it to her. 

“Take a moment.” 

After taking several slow sips from her water, Marie continued. “I apologize, sometimes the cough just comes out of nowhere. Sorry, you were saying…?”

Snape narrowed his eyes and lowered his voice. “I was asking how you knew about our guest. Soren had better not have been in here after I explicitly told him you were not well enough for visitors.”

Marie feigned surprise. “Soren? No of course not! Harry mentioned something about it the last time he was here, said he was hoping he could bring his godson to come and play. I just assumed he’d finally arranged it.” She smiled, but a small blush on the side of her neck started to flare and she hoped he wasn’t clocking her blatant lie. Goddammit Marie, you’re becoming pathological. 

Snape stared for a moment before relaxing his face slightly. “Yes, well, he has. Hopefully the boy will be far better behaved than his impertinent Godfather. Although I know his grandmother, and she’s quite a proper woman, so hopefully he won’t goad Soren into too much mischief.” He was already imagining the possibilities and was contemplating a preemptive dose of calming draught ahead of time to soothe his nerves. 

“I’m sure the boys will have a fantastic time. It will be so good for Soren to have someone his own age to play with.” 

“Yes, hopefully it will help him work out some of his energy so he can focus when the new week comes along. And perhaps I can finally have some time to get some work done.”

Marie just sat there smiling, an awkward silence hovering between them. 

“Very well, then I shall leave you to rest. Do you need anything before I leave?” 

“I’m really feeling much better, maybe this afternoon I can come and meet Harry and Teddy, say hello, get a little bit of fresh air in my lungs. I think I’ve had quite enough time in bed.”

Snape raised an eyebrow. “I suggest you take today to rest and recover fully. If you are in need of some additional books, I can have some sent up for you. I also think it is best not to risk exposing the children to any unwanted germs. You did so politely remind me that it is through viruses and bacteria that one becomes ill. I would hate for Soren or Teddy to fall sick because of your impatience.”

The emotional blackmail had its intended effect, there was no way Marie wanted to risk either of the little boys getting sick. She just hoped that Soren’s short visit last night hadn’t put him at any unnecessary risk. 

“Yes, you’re quite right.”

“How unusual,” Snape said, reaching a hand down to feel her forehead once more. “Are you sure you’re not feeling feverish?”

“What? No, I feel much better…really!” 

“And yet, you tell me I’m ‘quite right’ and are not arguing with my instructions for you to stay in bed? I must admit, Ms. Cloutier, this is quite out of the ordinary for you. Complying without a single cheeky response? Perhaps I ought to consult a healer after all.” His sarcasm dripped like honey laced with a bit of spice. 

Marie dropped her head to the side and gave him a small pout. “Very funny, Lord Kent. I don’t always argue with you.”

“No, sometimes you just ignore me completely and do as you please regardless. But I hope this time you will respect my directives. I should hope you see the wisdom in my requests, or would you prefer I threaten you with unpleasant consequences?” He casually glanced down at her slippers, which were peeking out slightly from underneath the bed. 

Marie turned bright red, refusing to ever acknowledge that she’d already learned that lesson the hard way. “There’s no reason to worry, I find I can be quite good at following directions when I agree that they make logical sense. I only argue when your reasoning isn’t sound. But on this, we agree. I will happily rest and read today, and would very much appreciate it if you would send up some more books. Thank you for the offer.” She tried to school her face as though she were unbothered, but the burning tips of her ears and the flush on her neck belied her.

Snape smirked, certain now that she had no doubt stepped out of bed and discovered his little charm. And it pleased him to no end that it had had the intended effect and she was now quite content to follow his orders without further argument. He had to work to suppress his more salacious thoughts. 

“Very well, I am glad we’re on the same page. For the books, do you have any special requests or shall I make the selection for you?”

“Surprise me,” she smiled. 

“I shall send them up with Tinny after breakfast. Now take some rest.” And with that, Snape headed for the door, his heart buoyed by the banter and seeing her well again. 

As he stepped into the hall, Snape knew he was in dangerous territory. He had allowed himself to develop feelings he’d sworn off years ago. It's completely inappropriate. She is far too young. She is also your child’s governess for Merlin’s sake. Not to mention, absolutely nothing you are imagining is the least bit possible—you are deluding yourself if you think any of it will ever become a reality.  Didn’t you learn this years ago? Get control of your emotions before you make a mess out of everything, you pathetic fool.

His negative self-talk had the intended effect, and the small burst of joy he’d felt had been properly smothered, replaced with a bitterness and hopelessness that was far more tolerable and familiar.

Snape and Soren spent the morning enjoying a leisurely breakfast and then in the library doing some “reading time.” Snape was trying to make an effort to carve out time, outside of school and bedtime, for Soren to read, or at times, be read to. It was grating for Snape, but he was determined to see the boy improve as soon as possible, knowing his future depended entirely on both his ability to read, and his enjoyment of it. 

After reading and a mid-morning tea, Snape took Soren out to the garden, where he walked him along his rows of plants and flowers, pointing out important potions ingredients and describing their properties. Now that he knew the boy had a decent memory, he was determined to expose him to as much knowledge as he could, hoping he could continue to build on it as he grew older. If he’d only had someone to do that for him, Snape was sure he’d have been unstoppable. There would be no excuse for Soren not to be the top of his class in every subject when he got to Hogwarts, Snape would make sure of it. 

Finally, after an hour of walking in the garden, and plenty of pestering from Soren, Snape relented and agreed to take him to the maze.

“Please, father!! Show me, show me!” Soren begged, desperate to see how his father could master the maze in less than 3 minutes. 

With as much dramatic flair as he could muster, Snape feigned reluctance. “I’m not quite sure that I should. If you learn my secrets, how can I possibly be sure you won’t leak them to Ms. Cloutier at your earliest opportunity.”

“But I won’t! I promise!” 

“How can I be sure? For all I know she’s sent you as a spy, to lure me into believing I could trust you, when you were in fact her devoted ally all along.” Snape said, peering down at the boy with a look of suspicion. 

Soren giggled. “No, father! I won’t tell, I promise!!”

“I’ve seen how close you are with Ms. Cloutier. I also know she’s not above bribing you with all manner of things to win your affection and convince you to reveal your secrets.” 

“Please, father!! I won’t tell, I promise!” Soren was pulling on his hand now, begging him intently. “Pleaaasssee!!”

“Not good enough, I’m afraid. What can you offer me? You need to prove your loyalty, convince me that I can trust you.”

Soren thought for a moment. “Like tell you a secret?” Suddenly he became nervous as his mind flashed with all of the secrets that he and Ms. Cloutier were hiding from the man. Some of them were small things, like how she’d transfigure bath toys for him, or play games with him in the classroom, but of course the big one was the wand, and his stomach suddenly lurched. “I don’t want to.”

The little boy’s face shifted suddenly to gloom, and even though Snape had only been playing him, he was sufficiently concerned at how quickly the boy’s countenance had changed, and how his happiness had evaporated instantly at the mention of a secret. 

Snape paused and put a hand on Soren’s shoulder. “I was only teasing you, Soren. Of course I know you have a special relationship with Ms. Cloutier, and I am glad the two of you are so close. However, you shouldn’t be keeping secrets either. Secrets can be very very dangerous. Is there something you want to tell me?”

He kept his voice free of scorn, hoping it was something silly, and not something more concerning, although his mind was starting to spiral with all sorts of dark possibilities. His own childhood abuse and his years as Head of Slytherin made him entirely aware of the many horrid ways even the most unassuming adults could prey on children.

Soren shook his head, but his eyes were brimming with tears. “No, father.”

“Soren,” Snape hardened his voice. “If there is something bothering you, I want you to tell me. Is Ms. Cloutier asking you to keep secrets from me?”

Again, Soren shook his head, his voice barely audible. “No.”

Snape grabbed Soren’s hand and walked him to one of the benches in the garden. He sat down and put the boy in front of him so he could look him in the eyes. “Tell me the truth. Is there something you or Ms. Cloutier are hiding from me?” 

Soren fidgeted, tears streaming down his face. “She didn’t tell me to keep any secrets. I promise.” And technically that was true, he was the one asking her to keep secrets, but either way he knew it was wrong. 

Snape wasn’t stupid, he could see there was something weighing on the boy but he didn’t want to scare him. “Do you know the difference between a dangerous secret and one that is harmless?”

“I don’t know.” Soren whispered, kicking at a small pebble with his toe.

“A dangerous secret means someone could get hurt. Or someone has been hurt. No adult should ever tell you to keep a secret. It is not your job to protect them. Ever. No matter who it is.”

“It’s not a dangerous secret. No one can get hurt.” Soren said, tears streaming down his face.

“I see. But you’re afraid I might be angry with you or Ms. Cloutier if I knew?”

Soren nodded. 

“But you haven’t been harmed in any way? You are not in danger, or Ms. Cloutier is not in danger?” 

The boy shook his head again. “No one is in danger.”

“Is it something small, then? Such as Ms. Cloutier gave you an extra biscuit at tea time, or gave you a small snitch to play with despite me saying I didn’t want her to spoil you with toys?”

Soren’s head shot up, a look of shock plastered on his face.

“I see.” Snape said, exhaling and leaning back on the bench for a moment while he composed his thoughts. “I do not like for either of you to flout my rules, nor do I appreciate being deceived or lied to, however, I recognize that there may be small, harmless things shared between you both. However, there is a big difference between a biscuit or a toy, and something dangerous or potentially harmful.”

“You know about the snitch?” Soren said, a few tears spilling. “I’m sorry.”

Snape had to control himself from rolling his eyes. “You haven’t exactly been discreet. I’ve seen you chasing and jumping after it in the gardens all week. I wasn’t born yesterday. However, since you’ve been doing your school work and reading, and behaving for the most part, I’ve turned a blind eye. Besides, it keeps you entertained outside, getting plenty of fresh air and exercise. Nonetheless, I would have preferred if she’d come to me and told me. Or better yet, asked for permission. So I will have a conversation with her about that, however you should not need to concern yourself with keeping even a small secret like that, she should know better than to put you in a position where you feel you have to hide something from me. Do you understand?”

“Yes, father.”

“But even small secrets can damage trust. I’m not angry with you at all, but I would rather you be honest. I do not want you thinking you have to keep things from me to shield Ms. Cloutier or anyone else from being in trouble. No adult should ever ask you to keep something from me.” Snape was definitely going to have to talk to Ms. Cloutier about this. He filed it away as one of the many things on his list to discuss with her when she was better. 

Soren reached up to wipe the sleeve of his jumper across his face, his father catching his arm just before he could do so. 

“No.”  Snape dipped into his pocket and pulled out a handkerchief, dabbing at the boy’s face before handing him the small piece of linen so he could wipe his nose. “Now then. Is that all?”

Soren nodded, feeling relieved.  “Yes, father.”

“There’s nothing else you feel you should tell me?” Snape stared him down. “There’s nothing serious going on you think I should know?”

“No, father. I promise.” Soren almost felt bad, but no one was being hurt, right? The wand was a silly thing, like the snitch, and besides it was over now. No reason to get himself or Ms. Cloutier in trouble. 

“Good.” Snape stood, patting the boy on the head as he continued to stroll down the path. “Now then, if I have your word, as a gentleman, perhaps I will show you how I’ve mastered the maze.…” 

“Yay!” Soren clapped excitedly, all thoughts of the wand and the lies vanished from his mind. 

“Although perhaps I should consider one condition…” Snape said ominously.

“What condition?”

“Have you ever heard of the Unbreakable Vow?” Snape said, clearly joking, but thinking it might make for an interesting lesson in magical history as he walked with the boy toward the maze. Soren, skipped with delight the entire way. 

Chapter Text

After lunch Soren was bouncing off the walls, clearly excited about Teddy’s visit, but also with that hyperactivity Snape recognized as a sign the boy was overtired. Snape knew it would prove difficult to get him to sleep, but for his own sanity, he still made Soren go to his room for “rest time.” He had enough experience with children to know that when they were exhausted, they were far more likely to get themselves into trouble and he wasn’t willing to take the risk. 

“But I’m not tired, father,” Soren whined, dragging his feet the entire way down the hallway, ten paces behind.

“Your feelings on the matter are immaterial. You will rest—quietly—in your room, or I will tell Mr. Potter that he will have to bring Teddy on a day when my son is behaving properly. Now that’s enough, quit dawdling.” Snape clicked his fingers loudly, attempting to keep control of his irritation as he ushered the boy down the hall.

“Why can’t I wait downstairs in the parlor with you? I can read quietly. Or I can help you in the potions lab if you want,” Soren offered, with an air of hopefulness. 

“Or you can quit stalling and do as you're told. You’re taking a nap so you’ll be far less insufferable this afternoon. Now move, Soren. My patience is wearing thin.”

Soren put on an impressive pout as he stomped the rest of the way to his room with just enough effort to make it clear he was annoyed, but not quite so much that he would arouse real ire. “I’m too old for a stupid nap.”

“Clearly not.” Snape said as he took him by the arm, escorting him the rest of the way into the room. He closed the door firmly and bent down to eye-level. “Enough. You will stop this tantrum immediately. Now take off your shoes, fix your face, and get into bed. I don’t want to hear another word.”

Soren knew that look and that tone well enough to know when he was about to push things too far, so he huffed quietly as he took off his shoes before dropping them loudly on the carpet and climbing into bed with a scowl still stuck on his face. 

“If I were you, I would use this time wisely and change my attitude. If I come back in here and find you continuing to be this petulant, I will send Mr. Potter and Teddy directly back home, and you and I will have a far less pleasant afternoon. Do you understand?”

“Yes, father.” Soren wasn’t stupid, he knew when he was in dangerous territory, so he attempted to soften his voice slightly although it was clear he was still upset.

“Good.” Snape pulled the covers up around him and flicked his wand until the curtains closed and the room fell dark. “Sleep or do not sleep, but you will stay in bed and be silent. I will come and fetch you when your rest period is over.”

Soren said nothing, still brooding slightly as he turned onto his side, gripping his rabbit tightly. But despite his best efforts to stay awake out of spite, he was fast asleep within two minutes.

When Snape came to wake Soren 45 mins later, he was pleased to find that a small nap had done wonders for the boy who was back to being his happy and cheerful self. 

Soren practically jumped out of bed, slipping on his trainers and waiting for the laces to tie themselves up (a clever little spell Snape had put on for him after he’d grown weary of constantly having to tie his shoes). 

“He’s going to be here soon!” Soren exclaimed, jumping up and down. 

“Settle down, Soren.” Snape said, knowing there was no way the boy would possibly calm down. “He’ll be here in fifteen minutes. Come, let’s comb your hair before we go downstairs, I don’t want you looking like a heathen.”

“Can I bring my snitch?” Soren asked, relieved that he no longer had to hide it. 

“Yes. But you will stay on the ground. Both of you. I will tell Teddy as well, but no climbing trees or throwing the snitch high into the air or anything else daft. I’d prefer to make it through the afternoon without healing any broken bones.”

Soren ran to his wardrobe and grabbed the small snitch, shoving it into his pocket before allowing his father to douse his head with a quick aguamenti and run a comb neatly through it.

Snape had Tinny set up a tea service while they waited by the fireplace, Soren practically bouncing up and down on the couch in between bites of biscuit and sips of tea. 

Finally, they heard the telltale whoosh of the floo, and Harry stepped out, holding the hand of a small boy with bright green hair. 

Soren nearly fell off the couch, he’d never seen a boy with green hair, and he jumped out of his seat and ran over to him. “Wow, your hair is green! How did you do that?”

“Soren,” Snape grumbled from his chair, but before he could say anything else, Harry jumped in. 

“Soren, this is my godson Teddy. He’s a Metamorphagus, which means he can change his appearance.” Harry looked over at Teddy who looked a bit shy. “Can you say hi to Soren?”

“Hi,” Teddy said, holding tightly to Harry’s hand. 

Soren was far too excited. “Can you make it change color?”

“Sometimes,” Teddy said, “Mostly it just does what it wants. But my Nana says when I get older I’ll learn how to change it whenever I want.”

All of a sudden, his hair changed to a golden blond, and Soren’s eyes went wide with awe. It stayed that way for a few seconds, before changing back to a bright green. 

“I guess it wants to be green right now,” Teddy shrugged. 

Soren grabbed his hand. “Wanna go play in the garden? Did you bring any toys to play with? I have a ground snitch and we have a maze, it is super fun!”

Harry took a small backpack off of his shoulder and handed it to Teddy. “Here, Teddy.”

“What did you bring? Can I see?” Soren reached for the boy’s bag until he felt his father’s hand on his shirt, pulling him backward before he could touch what wasn’t his.

“Not yet. Both of you sit for a moment so we can go over some rules.” Snape said from his armchair, his deep, stern voice causing Teddy to grab Harry’s hand tighter. 

Harry walked Teddy over to Snape. “First let’s introduce everyone properly. Teddy, this is Lord Kent, he’s Soren’s father. Can you shake his hand and introduce yourself.” Harry wasn’t usually so formal, but he knew Snape well enough to know he would expect it.

Teddy was clearly terrified of the man, but he eked out a small greeting. “Hi, I’m Teddy.”

Snape took in the boy’s face, seeing pieces of his dead parents which unsettled him slight. “Good to meet you, Teddy. Now take a seat so we can go over a few things first.”

Once Teddy was seated on the couch, Soren plopped down next to him, smiling and swinging his legs. “Do you want some tea and biscuits, they’re really good!”

Teddy shook his head. “No, thanks.”

Snape leaned forward slightly in his chair and looked at the two little boys sternly, addressing them in his “Professor” voice. “You may play in the garden, or in the maze, but I do not want you anywhere near the side garden where some of my more valuable magical plants are. Soren, you know where that is, so I expect you to keep Teddy away from there. It should go without saying, but do not touch, pick, pull, or eat any of the plants in the garden. You may play on the grass, the path, or in the maze, but no climbing trees. The grounds are quite extensive, but you are not to go beyond the large hedges at the end. Is that clear?”

“Yes, father,” Soren said, enthusiastically. 

Teddy just nodded his head. 

Soren turned to the other boy. “You should say ‘Yes,sir’” he admonished lightly. “That’s how you’re supposed to talk to adults.” 

Snape was highly amused seeing his son foist manners onto the unsuspecting boy, but he didn’t allow his face to betray him, although he certainly wouldn’t correct him. 

“Yes, sir,” Teddy replied, glancing over at Soren for approval.

Soren beamed in delight, gave a decisive nod of approval and turned back toward his father. 

“Good. If you wish to come inside, you may do so. But you will let Tinny know where you’ll be. You may go upstairs to the West Wing, Soren will show you where that is, but do not disturb Ms. Cloutier. You may play quietly in Soren’s room or the classroom, but not in the hallway or on the stairs. And certainly there will be no roughhousing, running, or throwing things inside the house.”

“Ms. Cloutier is my governess, but she’s sick.” Soren added with an air of authority. “She’s not to be disturbed while she’s recovering.” He repeated word-for-word what his father had said to him multiple times over the last few days, even if he had blatantly ignored the directive. 

“Soren, I think I can manage, thank you,” Snape said, raising an eyebrow, even if he was secretly quite pleased. 

“You may visit the library, however you are to treat all books with proper care and respect. If you pull one off a shelf, you should return it to the same place. No creasing pages, certainly no tearing them, and no playing with the books in any way in which they might be damaged. Soren, I am holding you personally responsible. If you choose to take Teddy into the library, I expect you to show him the proper way to handle the books or neither of you will be allowed back there.”

“I will, father, don’t worry.” Soren said, proudly. He turned to Teddy, “It’s OK, I’ll show you everything. Do you like to read? I’m reading Oliver Twist right now and then Ms. Cloutier said we could read Tom Sawyer next. Did you ever read those?”

Teddy shook his head. 

“They’re really good. And they’re proper chapter books.” Even though Soren couldn’t read those books by himself, he felt a slight bit of superiority now that he had been exposed to them. “We do a lot of reading in our house. Father says knowledge is the most important thing you can possess and no one can ever take it from you.”

Snape cleared his throat and Soren turned quickly to give his father his rapt attention. 

“I will be brewing in my potions lab, but the dungeons are completely off-limits. The door is warded, but you will stay far away from there. The East Wing upstairs is also completely off-limits. If you need me, you will ask Tinny to come get me. Is that understood?”

“Yes, father,” Soren said again, nodding enthusiastically. 

“Yes, sir,” Teddy whispered again, this time without prompting. 

“Good. Are there any questions?”

“No, father.”

Teddy shook his head, but when Soren swung his head around to give him a stern look he added “No, sir.”

Harry sat back, smiling to himself as he sipped his tea. He could see Soren coming into himself, and there was no doubt in the world that he was Snape’s child. Even though the boy had a far more outgoing—and pleasant—personality, he definitely had an unmistakably authoritative nature for someone so young. He tried to imagine how intense the boy would be after several years of living under Snape’s roof. It was clear he was bright and intelligent, and as long as he was given enough love and support, he would be a force to be reckoned with, a real leader. Harry could imagine him as Hogwarts prefect one day, probably terrifying the first years to bits. 

“Very well. Then you may go and play.” Snape pronounced, releasing the boys to their own devices (although Tinny had been given strict instructions to keep an eye on them). 

“Come on,” Soren said, standing and grabbing at Teddy’s hand. “Do you want to play with my snitch or do the maze? Or do you have toys you want to play with?”

Teddy looked back at Harry a little unsure. 

“Have fun, Teddy. You too Soren.” Harry said, giving Teddy an encouraging pat on the shoulder. 

“You should come play with us too, Mr. Potter!” Soren said, acknowledging Harry for the first time since he came through the floo, having been too preoccupied with Teddy. “It will be fun!”

“I think you boys should enjoy some time playing by yourselves. But I’ll see you a bit later, OK?” 

“Yes, sir,” Soren said, pulling Teddy by the hand as he made his way to the back door. “What did you bring? I don’t have a lot of toys, but we can play whatever you want. Do you want to play hide and seek? Or we can chase the snitch? Or we can go to the maze?”

Teddy allowed himself to be dragged outside, encouraged slightly by the dark-haired boy’s energy and confidence. “What’s the maze?”

“You have to see it, it’s my favorite thing!” Soren shouted as they ran out the door.

When the back door shut, Snape looked at Harry. “Are you planning to invite yourself to stay or will you come back for him later?”

“I’m flexible. But if you have things to do, please don’t let me keep you. I can come back later.”

Snape stared briefly. “That would be fine. Since Ms. Cloutier has been ill, I’ve had far less time to work, though I have a new concept I’m experimenting with.”

“Please, go ahead. I can come back at 4pm, or if you prefer you can just send a message through the floo and I’ll come and get him whenever they’re done playing.”

Not one to turn down a good offer, Snape agreed. “Very well, I will send for you later.”

“I can also stay and help if you like,” Harry offered. “If there’s anything you want to test out or need assistance with in the lab, or maybe just an extra pair of hands.”

Snape stared. “If I ever need assistance in blowing up my cauldrons, you’ll be the first to know. Otherwise, I’m quite capable of carrying out this work alone…not that I get much of a chance these days,” he mumbled to himself. 

Harry gave him a nod and a smile. “Good luck then, I’ll see you in a few hours.”

Without further fanfare, Snape got up and disappeared into the dungeons, leaving Harry alone in the parlor to finish his tea while the two young boys ran through the back gardens toward the maze. 

“My father made this all by himself. He planted it and he created all of the spells that make it work,” Soren said proudly as he stood in front of the maze. “My father is really clever. He makes potions and spells and everything.”

Teddy just looked at the giant maze. “What if we get lost? How do we find our way out again?”

“It’s OK, we can go together. I never get lost now. I do the maze all the time. But if we get stuck, Tinny can help us get out. But sometimes you just have to be patient and look for a different solution.”

“Who’s Tinny?”

“That’s our house-elf. Do you have a house-elf? They can do everything.” Soren said, as though he’d spent his entire life surrounded by elves.

Teddy shook his head. “No, it’s just me and my Nana.”

“Don’t you have a mummy and daddy?” Soren asked, innocently, as he entered the maze, Teddy following behind. 

“They died when I was a baby. In the war.”

Soren stopped and turned to look at him, his face falling in sympathy. “Oh. My mummy died too. I miss her a lot.”

“I don’t remember mine, I was a too little when they died. But my Nan is really nice. She takes really good care of me.” Teddy’s hair changed to pink and freckles appeared on his face. “And Harry too. He is always coming to get me and taking me to do fun things.”

Soren giggled. “Your hair turned pink! And you’ve got freckles!”

Teddy smiled and gave a small shrug. “Sometimes it just happens.”

They came around a curve of the maze and hit a dead end.

“See, this looks like we should turn around, but watch this!” Soren edged closer to the wall and when he touched it, the hedge in front of them disappeared. “It’s a trick, see.”

“Cool,” Teddy said, enamored, looking truly impressed for the first time.

The boys wandered through the maze, laughing and running as Teddy got more comfortable. When they finally made it to the center, Soren brought him over to show him his favorite part. 

“If you run your hand along the metal on the bench, watch what happens.” Soren was excited for Teddy to see what he’d discovered today when he’d been with his father, and when he touched the golden name plate on the bench, white lilies and purple forget-me-nots bloomed all around them. “See?”

“Wow!” 

“I told you it’s fun. It changes all of the time, but once you keep doing it, you start to learn all the tricks,” Soren said, feeling like an expert. 

Teddy reached his hand out to pick one of the stunning flowers. 

“Don’t!” Soren yelled, grabbing his arm, looking offended. “Father said not to pick any of the flowers! Didn’t you pay attention?”

“I just thought maybe I’d bring one home for my nan. They’re really pretty and she loves flowers.” Teddy sounded a bit hurt. “I only wanted to pick one.”

“Yeah, but you have to follow the rules. Otherwise I’m going to get in trouble.”

“Your dad is really strict,” Teddy said, sitting down on the bench. “He seems mean.”

“No, he’s not,” Soren lied. “He’s really nice to me. He teaches me lots of things and he loves me a lot. He reads me books and he even lets me help him with potions sometimes.”

“That’s not what Harry said.” Teddy sat on the bench and kicked at some of the gravel beneath his feet.

Soren scowled slightly. “What do you mean?”

“Harry said he just found out about you. And that he doesn’t even want to be your dad and maybe he’s not going to keep you. I heard him tell my Nan when I was supposed to be upstairs.”

“You shouldn’t listen to other people’s conversations if they’re not meant for you,” Soren said harshly, repeating his father’s words from memory. “Besides, that’s not true. My father loves me and wants me. And he thinks I’m really clever.”

Teddy shrugged. “OK.”

Tears were now welling in Soren’s eyes but he refused to let Teddy see them. “I’ll race you back out!”

Without giving the boy a chance to follow, Soren bolted from the center of the maze, knowing full well he could find his way out far more quickly than Teddy.

As he ran through the hedges, tears streamed from his eyes and he let himself weep quietly. He could hear Teddy following after him, calling his name, but he didn’t stop, and he moved as quickly as he could while he sobbed, determined that no one would see him cry. 

Teddy couldn’t keep up, and within a few seconds he was completely lost and starting to get disoriented inside the maze, panic welling up inside as hedges popped up in front of him and pathways appeared where they hadn’t been before. He shouted for Soren as he walked what felt like the same three lanes over and over again, his anxiety growing with each minute. “Soren! Where are you? I’m think I’m lost!”

When Soren finally stumbled out of the maze, he wanted to run far away. Instead he collapsed onto the ground, grabbing his knees as he heaved several more sobs into his arms. He allowed himself a few moments of tears before he lifted his head, wiped his face and picked up a rock, throwing it as hard as he could into the maze.

Just then, Tinny popped up. “Master Lupin is lost. He’s is shouting for help, I should be going to get him!”

“No, Tinny,” Soren said. “We’re just playing a game.  I’ll get him in a minute. Go away.”

Tinny nodded and disappeared with a small poof. 

Soren continued to sit at the entrance to the maze as he sniffled and wiped at his tears, listening as Teddy’s shouts became more frantic. He knew he should go find him, but a small part of him wanted the other boy to suffer. How could he say that his father didn’t want him? That he was going to send him away. He’s a liar. A stupid liar. He doesn’t know anything!! Soren picked up another rock and threw it as hard as he could. 

But no more than two minutes passed before Soren started to feel really bad, and he could hear Teddy’s shouts becoming louder and more desperate. He tried to remember what his father said that day when he’d lectured him about eavesdropping. Sometimes people hear things incorrectly, or out of context, which is why you should never pay attention to them. Probably Teddy just heard wrong, at least that’s what he was choosing to believe. He wiped his face with the sleeve of his jumper and went back into the maze, determined to put it all behind him. It took him less than a minute before he found the boy, Teddy’s hair now a bright white and his face pale and scared.

“You left me,” Teddy said, obviously hurt. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to, I thought you were going to race me out.” Soren was lying, of course, but he felt awful now, seeing the other boy so clearly upset. But he hadn’t wanted the boy to see him cry. He put an arm around Teddy’s shoulder. “It’s OK, Teddy,  I know the way out, come on. There’s no reason to be scared.”

Teddy felt enormous relief that he hadn’t been abandoned in the maze, and Soren boldly led them back out within a few short minutes.

“It’s not that hard when you practice. Me and Ms. Cloutier do the maze almost every day. And today my father showed me some new tricks! But it’s just your first time, you’ll get better. But you just have to concentrate, if you give up then you’ll just be stuck.” 

With a nod, Teddy grabbed both straps of his backpack, holding on tightly, grateful to be out of the maze, but not entirely trusting of Soren. 

“Did you bring anything fun to play with?” Soren asked, trying to push everything Teddy said to the back of his mind. It wasn’t every day he had someone else to play with and he wanted to make the most of it. “I have a snitch if you want to chase it with me.”

“I brought some toy dragons and knights, and gobstones, do you know how to play?” Teddy knelt on the ground and opened up his bag, proudly pulling out three toy dragons. 

When they started to fly around and breathe little puffs of fire and smoke, Soren’s face beamed in delight. “Wow! I’ve never seen a toy like that before! Let’s play dragons!”

Soren and Teddy sat on the grass while several small figurines dressed in medieval armor and the dragons played out several violent battle scenes. For a children’s toy, it was quite brutal, the small knights slashed each other to bits while the dragons hovered around breathing fire and smoke. Having never had magical toys, Soren was fully enraptured watching the charmed figurines move, shout, bleed, and burst into fake flames before regenerating only to be played with again. He was determined— no matter what he had to do, to convince his father (or maybe Ms. Cloutier) that he needed some of these toys of his own, it was all too much fun!

As the hours wore on, Teddy and Soren were becoming more comfortable with each other, giggling and laughing together on the grass as they pitted their dragons and knights against each other before finally deciding to turn to the gobstones. 

Despite being raised by a quasi-magical mother, Soren had never seen gobstones before either, so Teddy took his time trying to teach him as he laid the stones out on the grass.

“I thought your mum was a witch? Didn’t you play at home? Every magical family has a set.” Teddy said as he set up the board and reached for a bag containing the pieces. 

Soren shrugged. “My mum and me played other games, and she told me stories and she baked a lot of yummy things, but I never saw this before.”

“Oh, well, it’s pretty fun. Once you learn the rules it’s easy!” Teddy said, finally feeling like he was in control for the first time that day, dumping all of the stones out onto the ground. “I’ll just show you how it works and then we can play a practice game.”

“OK!” Soren said, paying close attention. He had a competitive spirit and even if he’d never heard of the game before, he was determined to try to win. 

The boys were deep in their fourth game, laying on their stomachs in the grass when a shadow passed over the top of them, a deep voice snapping both of their attention away immediately. 

“Gobstones, is it?” Snape stood over the boys, looking down on their game. 

Teddy sat up, still unsure about the stern man in black and deferring to Soren for a response. 

“Yeah! Teddy has been teaching me how to play, father! But if you lose, the stones squirt our really gross stuff!” Soren reached a hand out in the direction of his father, a hand that had been unceremoniously doused with the putrid liquid in the last game.

Snape recoiled and allowed his upper lip to rise slightly in disgust. “Yes, precisely why I’ve never been quite taken with this particular game myself.” In fact, having been teased mercilessly at grammar school for his dirty clothes and less than hygienic appearance, Snape refused to go anywhere near gobstones when he arrived at Hogwarts, terrified to be sprayed with a festering slime that would render him even more repulsive to his peers. “However, Soren, you should know you come from a long line of Gobstone champions, so I hope you’re not letting Mr. Lupin lure you into a false sense of security.”

Teddy sank back on his heels. “My name is Teddy,” he whispered. 

“Pardon?” Snape said, staring down on the young boy. Pathetic, he thought, just like his abhorrent father and that silly snippet of a witch who gave birth to him. But as soon as his insensitive thoughts burst forth, Snape chided himself, recognizing that the boy’s parentage was perhaps lamentable, but no fault of his own—he was an orphan after all, and a child. Snape waited a moment before pointing at one of the stones in the circle, “That red stone is egregiously close to the boundary. Either you’re exceptionally dim, Mr. Lupin, or you’re attempting to draw my son’s attention elsewhere before you strike with your green stone and divest him of several of his pieces.” 

Teddy turned red but didn’t look up at the man, his carefully planned set-up now revealed.

Soren stared down at the stones before he realized the strategy that his father had so clearly pointed out. Refusing to fall prey, he ignored the trap and took out Teddy’s green stone before it could strike three of his others. “Got you!” he said triumphantly, knowing he owed it completely to his father and not feeling the least bit bad about it. 

If Teddy was disappointed, he didn’t react. He took aim at another well-positioned stone and prepared himself for the next strike. 

“Finish your game, then come inside,” Snape said, pleased that his son had responded appropriately—if not winning the game— at least preventing a bloodbath. 

In three more moves, the game was over, Teddy having won, and both boys covered in dirt and a putrid slime that Snape insisted on banishing from them before he let them step a single foot in the house. 

“Can you come back again?” Soren asked as they walked to the parlor. “That was really fun. Do you have more toys and games?”

“Yeah, I’ve got loads at home. Maybe you can come to my house next time.” Teddy said, giving Soren a heartfelt grin. 

“I don’t know if I can…” Soren looked up at Teddy slightly forlorn. “I’ll have to ask my father. But we’re friends now, right?”

It had been an odd day for Teddy, but ultimately he’d had a good time. “Yeah, I’ll ask my Nan if you can come play.”

Soren beamed, hoping his father would let him go, still not ready for Teddy to leave and hovering close by.

A moment later, Harry appeared in the floo and stepped through, dusting himself off as he spoke. “Did you boys have a nice time?”

Teddy nodded and Soren let out an enthusiastic “Yeah! We did the maze and then we played knights and dragons and then Teddy taught me gobstones! He’s really good! Can he come back? Please, Mr. Potter?” Soren begged Harry. 

Harry glanced over at Teddy who was smiling and looking far more relaxed than when he left him. “I’m sure we’ll sort something out. It’s getting late now, we should get you back home now Teddy before your grandmother starts to worry. Say thank you to Lord Kent and Soren,” he directed, knowing Snape was expecting it. 

“Thanks for letting me come to play,” Teddy said, refusing to look at the scary man directly in the eyes but managing an appreciative face for Soren. 

“Bye, Teddy!,” Soren said, throwing his arms around the boy and giving him a quick hug. 

Teddy smiled and then pulled away before grasping Harry’s hand tightly as the two disappeared through the floo. 

When they were gone, Soren stood staring at the fireplace, a new feeling of disappointment and sadness weighing on him as he saw his only friend disappear into the green flames. 

“You need a proper bath. Desperately.” Snape said, snapping Soren from his melancholy. 

Soren looked down at his clothes, “But you already cleaned us with your wand.”

“No amount of scourgify can possibly get out the stench of the gobstones. It’s revolting.”

“Oh.” 

“You’ll go for a bath now, I refuse to allow you at the dinner table smelling like rotting flesh and sewage.”

“But I always take my bath after dinner” Soren whined. 

“Absolutely not. Upstairs. Now. Tinny will run you a bath and manage you, I refuse to sit in the same room with you until you’re sufficiently decontaminated from that filth. And I had better not ever hear you ask for a Gobstone set. Not in this house. Not ever.” 

“OK,” Soren said, taking advantage of his window. “But if I can’t have gobstones, can I get some toy dragons and knights instead? They breathe fire and smoke! And then they explode! And there’s fake blood and everything, but it doesn’t smell at all!”

Snape managed to contort his face into a look of deep contempt. “It’s not enough that you nearly burnt down my entire house on your own, you have the audacity to ask me for a fire-breathing toy? Madness.” He snapped his fingers and closed his eyes. “Get upstairs and into the bath this instant, I don’t want to hear one single more absurd request.”

Soren knew when his father was being over dramatic, so he decided to take one more chance to push his agenda. “It’s not real fire, father. It’s just pretend! Please!?!?!”

“If you are not out of my sight and up in your bath in the next five seconds, I will cast a human bubble spell and float you upstairs myself before dumping you into a tub of cold water with some of my strongest cleansing potions. I can assure you it will be far less enjoyable than whatever bath you usually take. Now, off you go.” Snape waved him off aggressively with a melodramatic sigh. 

“Fine, I’m going,” Soren complained as he headed to the stairs, only pausing to smile with amusement as he turned around for one final word. “But I’m going to tell Tinny that he better give me lots of bubbles or I’m not getting into the tub until he does.” 

“I don’t care if you make him give you a fire hose to rid you of that filth. But do not dare come downstairs until you are sufficiently washed and impeccably clean.”  

Soren bolted upstairs where Tinny was already filling his bath with plenty of bath soap and much to his enjoyment, several toy dragons that were breathing bubbles into the tub. 

Sunday was usually Marie’s day off, but since she’d been so sick, she was planning just to relax around the house. Lord Kent had officially cleared her so she was deemed well enough to leave her room and join them for meals, although he encouraged her to take things slowly. 

She’d been tempted to join Soren after breakfast for a walk in the gardens, but instead decided just to read instead by the fire in the parlor, where she promptly fell asleep. 

After lunch she helped Soren settle in for his afternoon rest, and she headed to the classroom to tidy things up and set them up just the way she liked it. 

Just as she was finishing, Lord Kent appeared in doorway. “Putting your classroom back the way you like it? I apologize, I meant to leave it as I found it. Did I forget something?”

“Not at all, I just thought I’d rearrange some things for the new week. I was thinking we’d do some magical history this week. Maybe re-enact some of the goblin wars.”

“I’m sure Soren will enjoy that immensely. He will not doubt be pleased to have you back in class. I’m sure after your engaging lessons he was bored to tears having me teach him.”

“Oh no, not at all. He seemed to really enjoy it. Maybe not sitting at the desk all day, but he was excited to tell me all about it, and I think he was thrilled that you took him to the potions lab. He loves spending time with you, you know. You should do it more often.”

For some reason, this made Snape uncomfortable. The boy was growing on him, slightly, but he’d spent far more time with him in the past few days than he had planned, and frankly, he was looking forward to things returning to normal this week. “Yes, well, I have a lot of pressing work to do, so I’m afraid I won’t be nearly as available for such trivial activities this week.”

Marie hardly felt like spending time with one’s son was a trivial activity, but she’d keep that to herself. 

“Perhaps we should cast a decontamination spell on the classroom, just to be sure there are no germs loitering in the air or on the surfaces. It wouldn’t hurt to open a window for some fresh air as well,” Snape suggested, not wanting Soren to fall sick with whatever awful infection had caused Marie to develop pneumonia, although he was certain her lack of self-care was at the root of it. 

“That’s actually a good idea. Better to be safe than sorry.” Marie pulled out her wand, but as soon as she slid it out of her sleeve, she froze, realizing her mistake. 

Before she could hide her shock and tuck it away again, Snape scowled and grabbed her wrist tightly, staring her down until her grip loosened and he could slide the wand out of her fingers. He rolled it around in his hand, carefully eyeing the unique design carved into the handle, one he had definitely not seen before. A darkness fell across his face as his brow furrowed.  “Whose wand is this?” 

Chapter Text

“Whose wand is that?”


Marie knew she was screwed and bristled under his intense stare, debating whether or not she should come clean. But she was tired of the lies. She let out a deep breath. “It’s mine.”

“Nonsense.” He sneered visibly at her response before he turned his attention back to the wand, examining it closely. “This wand is Ash, yours is made from Spruce, not to mention the carvings on this one are far more elaborate. Don’t insult my intelligence. Now what is going on here? Why do you have more than one wand?”

Marie hesitated and before she could think of what to say, Snape spoke again, lowering his voice and leaning closer as he enunciated each word. 

“Lie to me now and your contract will be terminated without references. I mean it, Ms. Cloutier, I am through with the deception. Tell me the truth.”

“I am telling you the truth, Lord Kent, this is my wand. My actual wand. My real wand.”

“And the other one? The one you’ve been parading around each day for weeks? The one that I found in the classroom? Where is it?”

Marie pulled the other wand from her left sleeve and he snatched it quickly. 

Snape realized quite clearly now that there were two different wands, although the color of their pale wood was similar enough that if he hadn’t spent so much time inspecting her wand recently, he might not have noticed. Try as he might, he couldn’t make sense of it. He stared at her. “Explain yourself.”

She struggled to say the words, but she knew she had no choice, and she was relieved in one sense for the charade to finally be over. She plucked her wand out of his hand. “This one is mine…” she paused for a moment before she finally found the courage to continue. “And the other one is Soren’s. Well, technically it was his mother’s, but he’s had it with him since he arrived.”

The anger shot through the man like a bolt of lightning, and even though he kept his face still, Marie could see his jaw tighten and a vessel on the side of his neck pulsing rapidly. He spoke through clenched teeth, as if he were afraid the rage would explode out of him if he opened his mouth a single millimeter more. “You knew my 7 year-old child had a wand and you didn’t come to me?”

“I didn’t know. I swear. Not until you found it…and I shouldn’t have told you it was mine, I just… I didn’t want to see Soren get in trouble.” 

“Excuse me?” Snape was incandescent with rage and beyond incredulous at her response. He could hardly look at her without wanting to blast a hole through the wall, yet he forced himself to respond, the fury within him growing as the full realization of the situation washed over him. “You lied to me, repeatedly, for weeks because you didn’t want Soren to be punished for something you know is dangerous. Have you lost your mind or are you truly that irresponsible!”

“I don’t know…I panicked.” Marie felt deeply ashamed. “I’m so sorry, Lord Kent.”

“I have no interest in your meaningless apologies.” Snape’s mind was reeling with memories from the past few weeks. Every interaction he’d had with Marie and Soren flashed before him, now somehow tainted by the knowledge that he was being actively deceived. It was a nauseating feeling to realize that none of what he’d experienced was honest or real, but a collage of smoke and mirrors devised for his benefit. 

Snape blamed himself. In the past, he’d have never let his guard down the way he had over the last few weeks; he’d have never trusted anyone as blindly as he had Marie, exposing his feelings, allowing himself to get emotionally invested in some silly overgrown schoolgirl of a witch. And even though he knew Soren was only a child, he felt equally betrayed, bitter that he had soothed and comforted the boy, even praised and encouraged him, when all the while Soren had been lying through his teeth. Everything was broken. 

“How dare you,” he spat, devoid of words for the first time, his mind bombarded with far too many complex emotions to properly communicate any of them. 

Marie could barely look at him, but she could see his anger shifting into something else. He was hurt, deeply, and it caused an ache in the pit of her stomach.

Snape took a moment to breathe and pack away his feelings, shoving them into the darkest recesses of his mind where he put all of the emotions he wasn’t prepared to deal with. He pressed his lips together, swallowed and stilled his voice, his face turning to stone. “There are no words to accurately reflect the depth of my disappointment in you, Ms. Cloutier.”

Marie preferred the anger, his disappointment was somehow infinitely more gut-wrenching, especially since she wanted so badly to please him. In the same way his praise wrapped around her like a warm blanket, his disappointment felt like poison in her veins, suffocating her from the inside and churning her stomach. 

“I detest lying. I am not shocked that a 7 year-old would lie to avoid being punished, but you…I expected so much better from you. You are not at all the person I thought you were…I suppose I have only myself to blame for not recognizing what a fraud you were sooner. Rest assured, it is com-pletely obvious to me now.” 

“I’m so sorry.” Marie’s eyes were filled with tears. His sharp tone and his words slashed at her like whip, flaying her open and leaving her raw. “Please forgive me, Lord Kent, I never meant to lie to you, I feel terrible.”

“The way you allowed me to nearly fire you, putting you on that absurd self-improvement plan when you knew it wasn’t even your wand. You must think I’m such a fool.” His anger was beginning to resurface as he snarled with disgust. “There is nothing more despicable than a liar. You’ve destroyed my trust and proven yourself entirely unworthy of this position. Pack your things, Ms. Cloutier. And leave immediately. Do not say goodbye to Soren, it will be too difficult for him to bear. Now get out of my sight.”

Snape turned abruptly toward his study, Marie chasing down the hall after him. “Please, Lord Kent,” she grabbed his arm. 

“Don’t touch me,” he hissed, ripping her hand off and continuing toward the East wing

“Please!!” Marie shouted after him, “I made a terrible mistake. I wanted to tell you, I really did and it was killing me. I just didn’t know how. I was afraid you would get angry and throw me out…and I didn’t want to leave. I don’t want to leave Soren…or you. Please, please don’t throw me out. There’s so much I haven’t told you that I wanted to but didn’t know how. Please don’t give up on me, I need this…” And I need you.  

Something in her pleas hit him directly in his gut. Part of his anger was feeling like he had been taken advantage of, or worse, that she was mocking him somehow, laughing at his stupidity behind his back. That she was just playing along in what was a silly little game for her, when it meant something much deeper to him. Yes, he had enjoyed the banter and the subtle power games, but it was more than that. He’d genuinely wanted to help her, to take care of her. And more than that he desperately wanted to connect with her and believe that she valued him for more than just his money…that she trusted him enough to want some kind of relationship with him that went beyond the transactional relationship of employer-employee. You’re so pathetic.

Marie let out a guttural cry of frustration and powerlessness, tears pouring down her cheeks. “Please!”

He paused in the hallway, but refused to turn around. 

Marie took a few small steps, approaching him cautiously like a wounded animal. “I can do better…I swear…And I wanted to tell you everything—desperately—I just didn’t know how. I know I was wrong. But please, give me another chance.” She slowly inched closer, lowering her voice to almost a whisper. “You told me as long as I was trying to do better, you wouldn’t fire me. I made a mistake, but I’ll do whatever it takes to fix this, I swear. Please don’t give up on me. I need you…I need you to help me.”

Despite his rage and the pain that ached deep in his chest, those words made his heart flutter. Snape wrangled with his thoughts, part of him wanting desperately to believe her, the more logical, cynical side in utter disbelief that his body dare betray him by responding to her lies. She doesn’t need you, you silly fool. She needs a job. She needs your money.  

Snape slowly turned around. His face still contorted in anger, his eyes flashing with fury. “I have no reason to believe a single word that comes out of your mendacious mouth. You’ve said all of this before, and it is clear that you’d say anything to keep your job, I know that now. You’ve proven to me what great lengths you’ll go to to play along with my requests, no matter how many lies it required or false emotions you had to conjure. But I refuse to be played for a fool. I’ll give you one month's severance. Given the generous salary I’ve paid you, that should be more than sufficient for you to survive until you find someone else who requires your…expertise.”

Marie shook her head. “No, please, Lord Kent, it’s not like that. Please, please give me a chance…just to tell you everything.”

He sneered at her pathetic begging, but her tears seemed genuine, and she was more distraught than he’d ever seen her. “You don’t deserve my time, and I certainly do not owe you a chance to explain yourself. You had plenty of time for that over the last few weeks and now your opportunity has passed.”

“You’re right…but I’m begging you, please let me explain. I know I made a terrible mistake, but I was afraid, and then I didn’t know how to fix it. I know I was wrong for lying about the wand, but I liked how it felt when you gave me the self-improvement plan. I liked how it felt having your time, your attention. I liked knowing you were holding me accountable, it made me want to be better. Yes, I need this job, but that’s not the reason I am asking you to let me explain.” Marie broke down into real tears. “I need your help, please. I’m in trouble and I don’t have anyone else.”

“That’s hardly my problem, now is it?” Snape was indignant that her tears were affecting him and he lashed out. There was a small part of him that wanted to forgive her— to comfort her, and wipe away the tears, but he loathed himself for it. Weak, stupid little man. A far bigger part of him wanted her to suffer for her sins. “And now that I see how little respect you have for the truth, I understand perfectly why you don’t have anyone else.”

Marie tried to ignore his brutal words, but they stung, and it caused a fresh flood of tears to come pouring down her face. “I know... Please don’t make me go. Please.”

Snape stood staring at her for a good thirty seconds before he closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. You’re a world class imbecile, Severus. Do not give in to your feeble emotions, she doesn’t deserve a thing from you. She’s a liar. A swindler. She’s only here for your money, can’t you see? 

“I will allow you one chance to explain yourself. But if you are not prepared to be completely honest— about everything—then I will ask for your resignation. If you want me to even consider letting you stay, the lies stop now and we have a fully transparent conversation…only then will I decide if it is even remotely possible for you to earn back even a modicum of my trust. Which I can tell you, at this given moment seems highly unlikely.” Snape couldn’t believe the traitorous words coming out of his mouth, the rational part of his brain having been completely by-passed by whatever pathetic part of him still wanted a reason to keep her. You’re the biggest dunderhead of all. 

“Please Lord Kent, I mean it, I’ll do anything.” Marie’s eyes held hope for the first time since their conversation began. “I want to fix my self-improvement plan. I’ll work really hard, I’ll do better, please.”

“I make no promises. I am going completely against my better judgment, but I feel pity for you. It has become exceptionally clear to me over the last few weeks, that in addition to your penchant for lies, you cannot be trusted to make even the simplest decisions like a responsible adult. You are clever, and while I find your teaching methods rather indulgent, you are obviously very capable. That being said, you’re an absolute disaster in every other aspect of your life, completely lacking in self-discipline. You may look like a grown woman, but at times you act like a petulant child in dire need of a trip or two over the parental knee. Believe me, you require far more than a simple self-improvement plan.”  

“I know.” Marie conceded, tears streaming liberally down her cheeks. “I’ll do whatever it takes. Please.”

Snape raised an eyebrow. “You have until 8pm to think about what is important to you and whether you’re ready to be honest…but I’m cautioning you, do not get your hopes up. You’ve gone too far this time, Ms. Cloutier, and once my trust has been destroyed, I can assure you, it will not be so freely given again.” He turned without another word and walked five paces before pausing and glancing over his shoulder briefly to add: “I wish to dine alone this evening. Tinny will bring your supper to your room.”

His implication was clear, he didn’t want to see her face for the rest of the day, maybe forever. She stood in the hallway and watched as he stormed to his study, the door closing firmly behind him with enough force to emphasize his displeasure.

It took her a moment to soak it all in before she threw herself onto her bed and collapsed in sobs. How could you let this happen? You’ve ruined everything!!  Things had been going so well. He had taken such good care of her when she was sick, and now everything was a disaster, he’d never trust her again. She knew she had pushed him too far, but she just hoped, somewhere there was a part of him that wanted her to stay, that saw her as more than a liar and an immature brat. 

Snape spent the next hour alone in his study, working through his feelings before he finally felt prepared to even think about dealing with Soren. He was enraged every time he thought about the series of lies he’d been fed over the last few weeks. His mind cycled between a dozen emotions, many of which he was loathe to admit. He was angry, of course, but most of all he was hurt that he’d been lied to by both Soren and Marie. The years of solitude had obviously weakened him, and he’d let his guard down, allowing them to take advantage of his vulnerability and his loneliness. He could feel the iron walls creeping back up around his heart. 

Marie was taking up the bulk of his mental space at the moment, but he tried to push it away. He could only deal with one thing at a time, and he was going to start with Soren, which was far more cut and dry. He paced back and forth for a good half an hour in front of his large window, thinking about the boy and what he should do with him. He’d be lying if he said part of him didn’t want to just call the Ministry and be done with it, but the moment that thought crossed his mind, he felt ashamed.


There really was no question as to what he had to do. He’d made it clear from day one that there was to be no magic, and certainly playing with a wand was an absolute gross violation of his most sacred rule. Not to mention Snape had promised Soren that if he ever put himself in serious danger again, he could expect to be punished severely. The numerous lies just compounded it all.

Snape had never in his life had difficulty carrying out a punishment, in fact there were times when he felt particularly righteous about meting out harsh justice to someone who had willfully disobeyed him. But what surprised him was that instead of anger, he felt fear, disappointment and betrayal. He knew he wasn’t the most loving and affectionate man, but he’d started to finally feel like Soren was his son, and he’d been stupid enough to believe the boy respected him. Sentimental fool. He felt like a failure, that not only had he been so naive, but that the boy had gotten away with breaking his most important rules and apparently had no remorse, content to lie and pretend like none of it had ever happened despite his multiple attempts to communicate with him with some amount of tenderness. That was your first mistake.

He had obviously been far too indulgent with the boy, and that was the problem. If Soren really believed he could get away with such blatant disobedience and lying right to his face, it was because he’d failed him by allowing him too much freedom, too many liberties. Like an idiot, he’d let Marie convince him that perhaps he should take a softer approach, and just as he’d feared, it had backfired and now his son was turning into a delinquent.  As he thought back over the last few weeks, remembering the dangerous stunts the boy pulled in the tree, and then the fire, instead of being harsher, Snape had attempted to be kind and understanding, and now he was regretting it. The boy obviously thought he could get away with such things, so he was going to have to lay down the law. Soren was going to learn the hard way that Snape had no tolerance for blatant disobedience, and even less tolerance for lies. 

Once he was sure he had come to a decision, Snape steeled himself and made his way to Soren’s room, determined to teach him a lesson he wouldn’t soon forget. As he approached the door, he saw the little boy sitting in his miniature armchair, his rabbit scrunched up to the side of him, and a book laid out on his lap. He looked so innocent and sweet sitting there peacefully sounding out each word, that it nearly robbed Snape of all his resolve. 

He deliberately disobeyed you. He nearly got himself killed and burned down the manor. He lied to you, repeatedly. You gave him plenty of opportunities to come clean and he continued to deceive you.  Snape hyped himself up, reminding himself that he would be doing the boy a great disservice if he didn’t follow through. He’d been far too lenient in the past, but he wouldn’t dare make that mistake again. 

Finally he hardened his voice and put on his “angry Professor” face as he walked through the door. “Get up, Soren, you’re coming with me. We are long overdue for a very serious discussion.” He snapped his fingers. “To my study. Now.”

Soren set down his book, his large brown eyes wide with fear and confusion. He knew that tone and one look at his father’s face and it was clear this was bad news. “What’s wrong father, am I in trouble?”

“That’s the understatement of the century. I know all about your wand and the lies you’ve been telling. Now get up, you’ve got a lot to answer for.”

Soren’s face crumpled into tears immediately and he leaned forward into his arms, cuddling his rabbit tightly. “I’m sorry!”

“Not nearly as sorry as you’re going to be, I can assure you.” Snape’s tone was bored, he would not be affected by meaningless tears and apologies.

When the boy didn’t move, Snape walked over and took him by the upper arms, lifting him effortlessly out of the chair and depositing him on his feet on the ground. He yanked the rabbit out of his arms and tossed it back in the chair. “You’re in enough trouble, I suggest you don’t make this worse for yourself.”

Soren didn’t fight him, but he cried the entire way down the hallway, his father leading him by the wrist while his small legs moved quickly to keep up with the man’s long, angry strides. 

When they got to the study, Snape pulled him in the door and left him standing and crying in the middle of the carpet while he continued to his desk. He stood for a minute and exhaled deeply before opening the top drawer, pulling out his wooden ruler and tucking it into his coat. On his way back toward Soren, he grabbed up one of the chairs from the front of his desk, and deposited it firmly in front of the boy.

Snape sat down so he was now at eye-level with Soren and grasped him firmly by both arms, pulling him slightly closer and ensuring he had his full attention. “Enough of your tears. Look at me,” he commanded with a small shake. “I cannot believe that you deliberately disobeyed me, using your wand when I told you that you were not to ever do magic or touch a wand before you turned 11. Do you have any idea how dangerous that is? You could have been killed, or permanently disabled!”  But it wasn’t anger he was feeling, it was true fear and concern. Even just thinking about the boy covered in soot, screaming about a fire in his room made his adrenaline rush. It was a miracle he’d escaped without being hurt.

These thoughts only strengthened his resolve. Snape was determined that by the time he was done, Soren couldn’t even look at a wand without having flashbacks to this whole ordeal. 

He pulled out the wand. “Whose wand is this.”

Soren wasn’t stupid, he knew the gig was up. “My mummy’s,” he said softly. 

“Why didn’t you tell me immediately that you had your mother’s wand?”

“I didn’t want you to take it from me,” Soren said, tears still streaming down his face. “Mummy said to keep it safe and not to let anyone take it.”

Snape let out a slow breath. “I understand that, but when you came here, I made it extremely clear you were never to touch a wand or do any kind of magic, did I not?”

“Yes, father.”

“So you knew you were breaking the rules. How many times did you play with it?”

Soren looked down at the floor, pausing for a moment before he answered. “Almost every day. But I wasn’t playing, father, I was practicing.”

Snape grabbed the boy’s chin and forced him to look up. “I beg your pardon? You are seven years-old, you do not practice magic. Ever. With or without a wand. Now tell me the truth, how did your room catch on fire?” Snape was having to work hard to keep his tone even and emotions under control. He couldn’t believe Soren had been casting spells everyday without his knowledge. How dense had he become in his years since leaving Hogwarts? How could he be so oblivious? It was his own naïveté that truly infuriated him. 

“I wanted to see if I could do incendio because it was boring just doing lumos and nox. I couldn’t do it at first so I tried again until I got it.”

Snape was floored. “So you mean to tell me you’ve been upstairs throwing spells around every day since you got here? And you got...bored so you thought you would try a much more powerful spell that shoots streams of fire out of your wand? Have you lost your mind!”

“But I did it…” Soren said quietly, the smallest hint of pride in his voice. 

“Yes, well done, you successfully turned your room into a raging inferno, risking your own life, destroying practically everything in there and nearly killing poor Tinny from smoke inhalation! It took me and three other grown wizards an exceptional use of magic to get that fire under control. That is absolutely nothing to be proud of, Soren. Do not elevate yourself as some kind of magical prodigy, you are nothing more than a disobedient, deceitful little boy who is lucky that your untrained, reckless wand work didn’t result in blowing up the entire manor, killing all of us in the process!” Snape was outraged at the revelation, it was far worse than he imagined. “Unbelievable.”

Soren started crying hard. “I didn’t mean to, I pointed it at the fireplace but the spell was too strong and I couldn’t control my wand.”

“Because you are SEVEN! You shouldn’t even have a wand, and you certainly shouldn’t be casting spells at your age. Which is exactly why I made that rule in the first place. I should put you over my knee every day for a week so that lesson sinks in. You are far too young for magic!”

“No, father, please don’t!!” Soren begged, putting both of his hands on his father’s legs. “I’m really sorry, I won’t ever do it again.” He collapsed into deeper sobs, feeling extremely sorry for himself. “Please don’t punish me!”

Snape was unaffected. “You’re about to get the spanking of your life, my boy, so don’t you dare even try to talk your way out of it.”

This pronouncement did nothing to quell the boy's tears and now Soren was crying even harder than before, the cries escalating to small wails. 

“Quiet down, I haven’t even laid a finger on you yet. Now quit wallowing in self-pity and think about why you’re here and why you’re being punished.” Snape sneered at the little boy, still in disbelief that a seven year-old was casting spells that powerful at his age. And with a spruce wand of all things, a notoriously difficult wood to handle even for the most talented witches and wizards. 

Soren didn’t respond, he was too busy crying loudly, and after a perfunctory eye-roll Snape prodded him “That’s enough theatrics. Now you will tell me why we’re here, I want it to be completely clear why you’re being punished.”

“I set my room on fire,” Soren finally managed to eke out between bouts of tears.

“And?” Snape stared, unimpressed. “I think there’s a lot more to it than that, don’t you? Or shall I refresh your memory?”

Soren dropped his head down not wanting to hear the inevitable list of transgressions. Floods of tears rolled down his face leaving wet spots on the ancient carpet beneath him, but at his father’s insistence, he toned down the audible cries, knowing it was of little use. At this point he knew his father well enough to know there was no way out, all he could do was accept his fate and try not to make it worse. 

“Look at me. I want your full attention. This is for your benefit, not mine. I don’t want to ever, ever have to repeat this, so listen carefully.” Snape took his face in both hands until he made eye-contact. He spoke slowly and evenly. “First, you know you are not to ever touch a wand or practice any magic before you come of age or you have express permission. It is not only a violation of my own rules, but it is also expressly forbidden by the law. You do realize if you are caught performing magic underage, the Ministry could take you away? I could be fined or imprisoned, and depending on your age you could be punished as well. And yet regardless of my very clear instructions. you kept your mother’s wand and were up here casting spells in your room despite knowing that was expressly forbidden, on several levels. In addition to disobeying me, you were not honest about the fact that you had a wand when you arrived here. A lie by omission. Then if hiding it wasn’t enough, you had the absolute gall to cast an extremely dangerous spell that nearly burned down the west wing. When I asked you what happened, you lied to me again, blaming accidental magic when you knew quite well it was a direct result of you faffing around with a wand you should have never had. Is this starting to ring a bell?”

Soren was completely distraught but managed to give him a pitiful “Yes, sir.”

“Most disappointingly, when I found your wand— which was terribly hidden, by the way—you allowed Ms.Cloutier to take the blame. You do realize I nearly fired her because of that. You should be particularly ashamed of yourself for that. I honestly don’t know what disappoints me more, that you would have the audacity to defy me so boldly, or that you had so much cowardice that you couldn’t face up to the consequences of the rules you so readily flaunted. I expected some degree of general mischief from you, but this goes well beyond that. It is a shameful reflection of your character.”

 “I didn’t mean for Ms. Cloutier to get in trouble, I was just scared.” Soren followed this with a particularly dramatic wail and a new batch of tears, his father’s clear disappointment hurting far more than whatever punishment he was about to receive. 

“Obviously not scared enough or you wouldn’t have been flitting about in your room every day, casually casting spells without a care in the world. You were only afraid when you thought you might get caught.”

Soren knew it was true, but it didn’t make him feel better. “But you did magic before you were 11.” He remembered his father mentioning on more than one occasion, and it was one of the reasons he’d felt entitled to keep practicing spells. 

Snape’s face went rigid and anger flashed in his eyes. He clenched his jaw and spat out his words. “I had no choice. I lived in an unsafe home where I was forced to learn healing spells before I could even read. And don’t you dare use that as justification for your blatant disobedience. I can assure you there is quite a difference between what I was forced to learn for my own survival, and you up here recklessly flouting the rules for your own personal amusement…because you were bored. You have no idea what you’re talking about and I better not ever hear you bring that up again.” 

His harsh words sent Soren into another round of fresh tears. 

Snape took a calming breath and waited a moment. “Right, that’s enough. This has gone on long enough. I don’t think there’s any doubt as to why you’re being punished. Is there?”

Soren cried harder, and shook his head slightly. 

“Pardon?” Snape stared him down. 

“No, father,” Soren said, tears pouring out of his big brown eyes as he looked up at the man with his most pathetic look yet. 

“Very well. Take down your trousers.”

Soren looked up at him with panic, backing away slightly with his hands flying back behind him. “No! Please, father!”

“If you don’t do it this instant, I will do it for you, and you will lose the privilege of keeping your pants. You have three seconds.”

Soren sobbed harder as he undid his button and fly and pulled his trousers down barely half an inch. 

“I meant properly,” Snape said as he yanked his trousers the rest of the way down before pulling the boy across his lap. There were times when Snape had followed through on a punishment half-heartedly just for consistency’s sake, but this was not one of those times. If ever a punishment had been earned, this was it, and he was going to make sure Soren remembered it for a very long time. “Brace yourself,” he said before he brought his hand down hard. 

Soren yelped loudly, not realizing how much more it would sting without the extra layer of fabric to protect him. He was crying hard after the fifth smack, but they just kept coming. 

Snape was trying to pace himself, he wanted this to be a memorable punishment, and he was trying to drag it out while being careful about how much force he was putting into it. Nonetheless, he spanked with gusto until he was sure his message had been thoroughly delivered.

When he stopped, Soren was completely limp over his knees, his hands grasping tightly onto the wool fabric of his father’s trouser legs, sobbing. 

“That was for using a wand, disobeying me and putting your life in danger. But you also lied. Repeatedly. I am exceptionally disappointed in you for this. Had you told me about the wand on the day you set fire to your room, your punishment would be over by now. But you didn’t, so we’re not done yet.”

Snape pulled out the wooden ruler. He had already given the boy quite a thorough spanking, so he knew he would have to be very careful not to overdo it. He silently added a sound amplification charm to the ruler and brought it down solidly, the sound of the smack far out of proportion to the force behind it, wanting to make sure Soren was suitably terrified. He waited several seconds between each one, taking his time delivering five more evenly-spaced smacks, the last one right across the boy’s sit spots where his briefs offered little protection. 

When he finished, Snape tucked the ruler away and put a hand on Soren’s back, giving him a moment to let it all soak in before helping him stand and putting his clothes back in place. 

Soren was crying so hard he couldn’t speak, so Snape brought him between his knees and pulled out a handkerchief. “It’s over. Now take slow breaths.” He wiped carefully at the boy's tears, but Soren was still crying hard, both hands flying back to try and soothe the fire in his bum.

Snape gave him another minute of quietly wiping his tears before he began to talk in a calm, low voice. “Hush. You’ve been punished, and now we move on. That’s more than enough tears, take some deep breaths and calm yourself.” 

After another minute, when Soren’s cries had settled down a bit more, he cupped his hand on the little boy’s chin. “I don’t want you to ever put yourself in danger like that again. And I swear to Merlin, if I ever catch you doing magic again without permission, I will give you a hiding that makes this one feel like a pleasant Sunday stroll in the park. Do you understand me?”

Soren still couldn’t string two words together but nodded his head. He couldn’t imagine anything worse than what he was feeling right now but he swore to himself he would never do magic again. 

Standing up, Snape replaced the chair and took Soren by the arm to the couch where he deposited him on the dark leather cushion.  He walked over to the bar cart and filled a tumbler with cool water before handing it to the boy. “Take a few minutes and calm yourself. Then we’ll finish our conversation and move on.”

This was the part that made Snape feel uncomfortable. When he punished his students, it was a relatively quick affair. A lecture, some good solid whacks with a ruler or a slipper, a harsh reminder that any repeat of said offense would result in a worse punishment, and then he sent them off to lick their wounds in the dorms. Comfort certainly wasn’t a part of the package. But it was different with Soren. He was much younger, of course, but it was also his son, and no matter how harsh or cold Snape might appear, he didn’t have the heart to send the boy out without som kind of reassurance.

When Soren’s glass was nearly empty, Snape lifted it from his hands and set it aside before taking a place next to him on the chesterfield. “Is there anything else you would like to say?”

“I’m sorry for doing magic, I promise I won’t ever do that again. I promise, father,” Soren looked truly heartbroken, tears still streaming down his face, his brown eyes rimmed in red, his lashes wet and dark.

“And no more lying. We’re going to have another discussion about that soon, but I will not ever tolerate lies. It destroys trust and is a terrible reflection of your character. Not to mention, once you start lying, no one will believe you even when you’re telling the truth. If you had told me about the wand right after the fire, I would have still been angry because you disobeyed me, but I would have respected your honesty and been proud of you for admitting your mistake. Everyone will make mistakes, but I want you to be the kind of person who can own up to them, accept responsibility, and be truthful. Otherwise your life will be lonely and sad. Trust is the only currency that matters in life, do you understand? And once it is gone, it is nearly impossible to earn it back.”

“Yes, father,” Soren squeaked out. “I’m so— soo- sorry,” his breath stuttered, releasing a new gush of tears.

Snape nodded his head, speaking in a softer tone now. “I’m sure you are.” He tapped Soren gently on the leg. “But you should be aware that I will always punish you severely when you lie, so it isn’t worth it. Ever.”

Soren heaved another deep sob and collapsed onto his knees, burying his face into his arms. 

“It’s finished, Soren. That’s enough.” Snape patted him awkwardly a few times on the shoulder. “Take some breaths or you’ll make yourself ill.”

Before Snape could even fully process it, Soren had thrown himself on top of the man, desperate for some genuine affection and reassurance as his tiny body wracked with sobs.

“I’m sorry father, please don’t be mad at me,” the little boy said. “I promise I’ll be good.” He threw his arms around his father’s neck and laid his head on his shoulder, halfway onto the man’s lap, reaching out desperately for some semblance of an embrace. 

Snape’s initial reaction was to recoil and tear the boy off of him, but instead he wrapped a single arm around him and patted him gently several times on the back. He spoke in a low quiet voice. “I’m no longer angry with you, but I want you to understand that I make rules to keep you safe. I don’t like having to punish you, but it is important that you learn to obey me. Do you understand?” He tapped him softly twice on his hip with a single finger. 

“Yes father.” Soren took the gentle pats on bias back as a sign he could stay and he crawled the rest of the way, adjusting himself so that he was sitting fully on his father’s lap, his head buried between the man’s neck and chest, settling his body into the crook of his right arm. “I’m really sorry.”

Snape was completely uncomfortable and his body went rigid, he was not a man who gave out cuddles, but even he didn’t have the heart to get up and dump the vulnerable boy onto the floor, despite his initial impulse to do so.  He took a deep breath and allowed Soren to cradle himself between his arm and his chest, “I’m sure you are, so I hope that means you’ve learned your lesson and we don’t ever need to have this particular conversation again.”

Soren lifted his head up and shook it hard back and forth. “Never! I promise.” He was sniffling and his breath hitched a few times, still feeling quite sorry for himself. 

“Good,” Snape gave the boy a few more gentle pats before he reached his limit on affection and picked Soren up, setting him on his feet as he stood from the couch. “Now, I want you to go to your room and have a rest.”

One of Soren’s hands went subconsciously back to rub his bum, those last few whacks of the ruler had been especially unpleasant and he hoped that was the first and last time he ever experienced that. 

“Come along,” Snape guided him toward the door with a hand on the back of his head, but instead of abandoning him there in the doorway as he’d planned, he walked the sniffling boy all the way back to his room. When they reached his bed, Snape lifted him carefully on top of the mattress, taking off his shoes before pulling down the corner of the bedsheets. “Get in and lay down, you’re taking a nap.”

Soren looked at him for a moment like he wanted to argue, but a single raised eyebrow combined with the throbbing in his backside made him decide against it. 

“On your stomach, if you prefer.” Snape offered, seeing his hesitancy. 

Soren obeyed, crawling under the covers, unable to stifle a yawn. 

Snape was about to tuck him in when Soren lifted his head up. “Oh no! My rabbit!”

“Where is it?”

“Over there, in my reading chair,” Soren pointed to the miniature armchair in his reading nook.

“Stay put, I’ll get it.” Snape walked several steps over to the little chair and grabbed the dilapidated rabbit by one if it’s crusty little ears before handing it to Soren, a look of disgust on his face. 

“Thank you,” Soren said as he snuggled his rabbit under the covers.

“I should cast a cleaning spell on that thing, it is absolutely filthy.”

“No!” Soren said loudly. “Please don’t. Sometimes I can still smell my mummy in his fur.”

Snape was skeptical, but he wasn’t going to do anything to destroy the one item of comfort the boy had. “Fine, it’s up to you. Now close your eyes.”

“I’m not tired,” Soren complained, followed by another yawn.

“Somehow I highly doubt that.” Snape swept his wand around until the curtains were all shut and the lights dimmed considerably. “Now get some rest. Tinny will bring you a tray for supper when you wake up. If you are tired and want to sleep until morning, that’s fine too. Otherwise you may read quietly until lights out.”

“Cuz I’m in trouble?” Soren sounded hurt. 

“It’s not a punishment, it’s just been an eventful day for everyone and I have a lot of things I need to work on, so I’m going to take dinner at my desk.”

“What about Ms. Cloutier?” Soren asked innocently. 

“Don’t worry about Ms. Cloutier, she is resting in her room, Tinny will bring her a tray as well.”

“Why? Are you mad at her? Is she in trouble?”

“That’s not any of your concern. The only person you need to worry about right now is yourself. And given the current state of your backside, I’d be extremely cautious about how I behaved right now.” He looked down at the boy with a pointed glare. “No more questions, it’s time to close your eyes and rest.” He gave the duvet a quick tug upward before tucking it into the boy’s sides.

“Yes father,” Soren said sleepily. Now that he was all cozy in bed and cuddling his rabbit, his eyes were feeling heavy. All of that crying had really exhausted him. His bum still felt like it had its own heartbeat, but the sting was fading slowly and it wasn’t painful enough to keep him awake. His body soon relaxed and he fell into a deep sleep within minutes.

Snape debated whether he would take his meal on a tray in his study or whether he would dine alone at the table, he honestly just needed some time alone to think and consider his options. Soren had been the easy one to sort out, it was going to be much more complicated trying to decide how to deal with Marie. 

He was glad he’d given himself this space and time to think, and he mulled over his options in the quiet comfort of his study, a cup of tea in hand. He’d have preferred a whiskey but he knew he needed to keep a clear head. At least for the moment. And now that he had calmed down quite a bit, he was glad he’d have a chance to talk with Marie and figure out what was going on. There was something nagging at him, the way she had begged him for help, a desperation in her voice and her eyes that went far beyond just someone who wanted to keep their job. 

If it had just been about the job, she would have been gone without a second thought. But if he was honest with himself, he knew that wasn’t the reason she was still here. Why he was giving her another chance after all of the lies, the way that she’d roped Soren into keeping secrets from him as well. He hated himself for it, but he wasn’t ready to see her go. 

Yes, he was plenty angry with her, but as he put the pieces together, he started to see a different side of things. He would have to be extremely careful how he proceeded from here, but if she wanted to stay, perhaps there was a way to make this work. He mulled over the possibilities for hours, having the fiercest debates with himself yet. 

At 8pm on the dot, Marie knocked on the study door. She was waiting to hear him say “Enter” but instead the door popped open on its own and she took that as an invitation to go in. After a deep breath, she crossed the threshold and made her way toward the desk.

“Sit.” Was all Snape said. He stood at the window, hands behind his back staring out onto the moonlit grounds, his back to the room, the curt demand the only acknowledgement of her presence.

Marie had never been this nervous before, and it was a whole different level of intimidating. She sat down in one of the chairs and waited. It somehow felt so much worse that he refusing to look at her.

Snape waited for what seemed like ages until he could hear Marie starting to fidget from anticipation, at which point he finally turned around and walked toward his desk. But he didn’t sit down, instead choosing to stand behind his chair before finally dragging his eyes relectuantly toward Marie, his face rigid and stern and his eyes as cold as stone. “You will be 100% truthful with me today or you will leave, Ms. Cloutier. Anything less than complete honesty moving forward will result in immediate dismissal. Is this clear?”

“Yes,” said Marie. 

“Yes, sir. For the duration of this discussion, you will address me with proper respect.”

“I’m sorry. Yes, sir.” She swallowed hard, she’d seen him angry on several occasions but now he was icy, almost detached, and that unnerved her even more.

Snape paced around the room slowly, keeping his hands behind his back. “Lies are insidious. Malignant. And like a cancer, deceit will fester and spread and before you know it, your world is shrouded in darkness, the lack of transparency choking the life out of your relationships and slowly rotting away anything healthy you’ve ever tried to nurture. You may think some lies are small or harmless, but they are not.”

He paused and Marie was unsure if she was supposed to respond, so she kept her mouth shut out of an abundance of caution. 

“There are few things I detest more than lying. To me, it is the greatest form of disrespect. A person who lies to you believes you are either unworthy of the truth, or too stupid to know the difference. And I particularly loathe anyone who takes advantage of the trust that has been given to them in order to further their own selfish motives. It is arrogant. Disdainful. Revolting.” 

His words were caustic and meant to burn, and they did. Marie felt them, viscerally and it only served to amplify her shame. 

“Tell me, Ms. Cloutier, at any point did you consider the ramifications of this whole charade? What this might do to the trust between us. Or worse, how your lies might harm Soren and his relationship with me?”

Marie could feel the tears forming in her eyes and she bit the inside of her cheek to try to hold them in. “No, sir. I didn’t mean for it to turn into this, I regretted lying to you almost immediately.”

“And yet, you sat in this very study, lying to me day after day instead of being honest.” That was the part that really needled Snape everytime he thought about it. How had she allowed the lie to go on for so long? 

“I’m so sorry.”

“Are you? You could have put an end to the lies at any point, Ms. Cloutier. You wrote up a self-improvement plan knowing full-well that the wand I found was not yours, yet instead of admitting to that, you played along, acting contrite for a crime you did not commit. Several times a day, you checked in with me, showing me your wand…no wait, let me correct that…Soren’s wand, regaling me with even more lies as you attempted to convince me of your non-existent short-comings. Then, you had the gall to sit in my study every evening, reviewing your goals, pretending you were committed to this absurd farce of a plan, and yet in all that time you still never once thought you should tell the truth? Do you have any idea how that makes me feel? Idiotic. Ridiculous. Pathetic.”

“Please Lord Kent. I know I was lying about the wand, but everything else on my plan was real. I put real thought into it— I wanted to do better, I still do. The guilt was eating me up every day. I never wanted to lie to you like that. Honestly.”

“Honestly? Don’t you dare use that word with me. I don’t know why I should believe a single thing you say, Ms. Cloutier. I had hoped that the self-improvement plan would be an opportunity for you to heal from your burnout, focus on your self-care and work toward your goals, but it is clear to me that my effort was neither appreciated nor valued. It was a farcical waste of both of our time. I should have listened to my instincts and let you go long before it got to this.”

Snape was seriously wounded and he couldn’t explain why. He could never stand a liar, but coming from Marie, this had felt like a complete betrayal. He’d taken a real interest in her—not just for his own entertainment—but because he was desperate to connect with her on a deeper level, to grow the trust between them, to look after her. He was never one to share his emotions with words, but he wanted to prove to her that he was capable of caring for her and most importantly, that he supported her future goals and dreams. As unconventional as it might be, it was his way of showing her that he thought she was special and worthy of his time and energy, which for him was far more valuable than all of the money in his vault. But while it was very real and meaningful for him, for her it appeared to be nothing but an elaborate act, and that made it far worse than a simple lie. 

Tears were pouring down Marie’s face and despite her best efforts, she couldn’t stop them. “I really did want to tell you, a million times…but I was afraid to upset you. I didn’t want you to be disappointed in me...or fire me. Everyday felt like it was too late, but each subsequent day the lying destroyed me more. If I could go back, I would have never lied to you in the first place, I swear. I really do regret that.”

“Yes, let’s revisit that, shall we? The original lie. Tell me what compelled you to risk your job and the defamation of your character to lie for Soren. What did you possibly think I was going to do to him that was so terrible it was worth…” he waved his hand around. “All of this.”

“I don’t know…it was stupid.” Marie closed her eyes and shook her head, wishing she had done things differently. 

“No, you don’t get to dismiss me that easily. You will tell me, Ms. Cloutier. What did you think I was going to do to Soren that required you taking the blame? Did you believe I would abuse him? Beat him black and blue?” Snape stopped pacing and stood over her now, his arms crossed in front. 

“I don’t know…but I figured you were probably going to, you know, hit him.” Marie couldn’t even say the word. 

“Spank him?” Snape offered, lifting both eyebrows at her clear avoidance of the word.

Marie’s face burned bright red and she just nodded her head. 

“Yes, and I did. Soundly. And he survived. He has already moved on and by now I’m sure any evidence of his punishment has long since disappeared. And yet here we are, tangled in a web of lies and deceit from which I’m not sure we’ll ever recover. Aside from the fact you may have destroyed your job and future prospects, your actions were far more damaging to Soren than the minute or less he spent over my knee, I assure you.”

“I think it’s far more harmful than you think...”

Snape cut her off before she could say anything else. “I think you’re forgetting the fact that we’re dealing with a magical child, Ms. Cloutier, he’s not some muggle boy for whom the greatest danger is riding his bike in the street.  He is going to spend his entire childhood and adolescence surrounded by powerful magic— spells capable of extreme harm, dangerous magical artifacts, and deadly potions. One error in judgment, one impulsive swing of the wand, one finger on the wrong magical item or a single drop of the wrong potion, and he could literally die. It is imperative that even if he is incapable of understanding the magnitude of the dangers all around him, that he learns to obey me and follow my rules, regardless of whether or not he understands the reason for them. It is impossible to childproof the magical world around him, so instead we have to teach him how to exist safely within it. I find harsher measures to be the most effective and easily understood, particularly for a younger child. The earlier they learn that you will not tolerate disobedience, the less you need to punish them as they get older. It may seem harsh to you now, but I am doing it for his own protection, to keep him safe. Eventually, he will learn self-discipline, but until he is capable of that, I will do it for him.”

Snape had always had an authoritarian nature, but becoming a teacher at Hogwarts had turned him into a strict disciplinarian. He took his responsibility to protect his students as a sacred vow, and although he’d been limited to House Points and detention when it came to the Potions classroom, he still managed to rule with an iron fist. He refused to have any child injured on his watch, and he would rather students complain about how mean and strict he was rather than see them get hurt. This was especially true for the members of Slytherin, for whom he was responsible outside of the classroom. He was harsh and quick to punish, and his students feared disobeying him, but they also respected him and knew they could count on him to protect them. When it came to his own child, however, his desire to keep him safe was so fierce it bordered on primal. 

“You could try other methods, you know, ones that aren’t so…violent.”

“Really?” Snape stared down at her with disapproval. “It was a spanking, Ms. Cloutier, I didn’t put him on a Medieval breaking wheel, for Merlin’s sake.” He breathed out an exasperated sigh. “I have no doubt his backside was stinging when he left here, but I can assure you that I didn’t leave a single lasting mark on the boy. No one has ever died from a smacked bottom, but countless have died from the misuse of magic. His own mother, for one. If that wasn’t enough of a deterrent for him it is clear that ‘natural consequences’ are beyond his capability to fully understand. There is no room for error— one more childish mistake with a wand and he could be dead, so if that means I have to put him over my knee every time he disobeys me to keep him safe, I will do so. Without hesitation or guilt. He’ll recover from a sore backside. Death, on the other hand, is rather permanent.”

Marie would never agree with his methods, but she wasn’t exactly in a position to be arguing with him at the moment so she closed her mouth. 

When Marie didn’t look convinced, Snape continued. 

“You do remember what he did, don’t you Ms. Cloutier? I want you to think about that for a moment. He had a wand in his possession and he was gallivanting around his room every day, tossing spells around like it was nothing. He cast an Incendio for Merlin’s sake.  Do you honestly believe you were doing him a favor by allowing him to get away without any consequences? He could have been killed, maimed, permanently disabled in a way no one could heal him. A 7 year-old with a wand? It could have been far more disastrous, and you believe that getting away with that was perfectly reasonable?”

“No…I agree with you, it was incredibly dangerous. But he seemed genuinely upset and scared, so I thought he’d learned his lesson, I didn’t think he’d ever do anything like that again. Besides, I had his wand, so there wasn’t much he could do.” 

Snape nearly laughed. “Oh, Ms. Cloutier, you cannot possibly be so naive. Children are not rational beings. If he got away with it once, believe me, that wouldn’t be the last time he thought he could get away with breaking the rules. An attitude I believe you’ve mentioned describes you quite well. What was it you told me? ‘If you don’t get caught, then the rules shouldn’t apply to you’— did I get that right?”

Marie bit the inside of her lip. “I was only joking…” She wanted to kick herself for ever saying that out loud to him, she should have known it would come back to haunt her. 

“I don’t think you were, Ms. Cloutier.” Snape leaned down and spoke in a low voice, just above a whisper. “I think you’re a naughty little girl who got away with far too much in her life and since you never had a single person hold you accountable, you believe you’re somehow above the rules. But now your complete lack of discipline means your life is spinning out of control and now you’re in desperate need of a firm hand to help you get back-on-track.”

Marie’s mouth went completely dry before he stood up and continued in his full voice as though he’d never paused for that aside, leaving her off-kilter as she tried to recover from the words lingering in her ear.  

“I will not allow you to encourage my son to follow your lead. Children need rules and consequences to thrive. Soren needs to learn that he will never be allowed to get away with breaking my rules, particularly not by seeking you out to aid and abet him.”

Marie could barely look at him, and had to keep reminding herself to breathe. “Yes, sir, I understand.”

“In addition to the poor attitude you’re modeling for him when it comes to obeying rules, I want you to imagine how difficult it has been for him to carry around all of that guilt. Not only guilt for playing with magic and nearly burning down the house, which as you saw for yourself had him physically sick for days, but the fact that he was expected to continually lie to me. He watched you lie to me—effortlessly— every single day, and because he looks up to you, he would have continued to do so for Merlin knows how long. He wanted to protect you, Ms. Cloutier, and it isn’t the only time. You’ve gone behind my back on multiple occasions breaking my rules, gifting him things like the snitch, allowing him to play games, giving him extra biscuits— seemingly harmless things that further erode our relationship as father and son. The fact that you have encouraged him to keep secrets from me, and to lie to me overtly, Ms. Cloutier has no doubt made him to believe that he wasn’t safe with me or that I wasn’t deserving enough for the truth. Your actions have done far more damage to Soren than a childish little punishment ever would.”

Marie felt devastated by this realization. “I’m really, truly sorry, I never even considered that. I should have come to you, about all of it.”

“And yet, you did not. You didn’t trust me enough to tell me the truth. You did not trust me enough as his father to handle him as I saw fit. Instead you decided you would handle things on your own. Because you obviously know best, what with your degrees in education and pedagogy. Is that correct?”

“I just wanted him to know I cared about him, that he could trust me. That I’d look after him.”

“Even if you disagree with my methods, you should respect my rules and my authority as his father. You are not his friend, you are his governess and the only other adult in this household— it is your job to uphold the rules I set, not undermine me or the way I do things because it doesn’t align with your own permissive ideas of child-rearing. If you cannot do that, you should not be here. Soren doesn’t need your protection, he needs you to be a responsible and consistent adult who will uphold the rules and expectations of this house, no matter what your personal feelings might be.”

“I realize that now. If I could go back, I’d do things differently. It was wrong of me to lie for him. I should have let you handle it.”

“Well, I did,” Snape said smugly, hoping she had finally seen his point. “It was far more delayed than it should have been, but I assure you, I made a valiant effort to ensure he doesn’t do something so reckless again.”

Marie had no doubt he would, but she still felt bad for Soren. “Is he OK?”

“He is absolutely fine, and I imagine when he wakes up tomorrow morning he will feel better than he has in weeks without all of the guilt and lies hanging over his head. It’s a shame you have no point of reference, Ms. Cloutier, perhaps if you’d ever been on the receiving end of such a punishment yourself, you would realize that it is all far less traumatizing than you are imagining it to be. A few smacks, a few tears, and it is over. A lesson is learned, forgiveness is granted, and the issue is resolved, full stop. Quite effective, in my experience, and far less damaging than weeks of lies and secrets and guilt.”

Marie nodded. “I understand. I shouldn’t have interfered…I’ll do better.”

“Yes, I think we’d best shift our focus to you now. We’ve beaten this horse quite to death, for lack of a better phrase.” Snape returned to his desk and sat down. “Now then, let’s discuss what you said to me in the hallway, the only reason that I am even giving you a chance to explain yourself.”

Marie’s ears started to burn thinking about it. “I’m not sure I remember.”

Snape slapped a hand down hard on the desk, causing Marie to jump slightly. “Don’t. Lie. To. Me. You will be honest, or you will leave. There will not be another reprieve.” 

Tears were rising up from the back of Marie’s throat. “I’m sorry…I’m nervous. I just need a moment.”


Snape’s face softened slightly at her vulnerability, but his voice still maintained it’s edge. “Take your time, but you asked for one more chance to explain yourself, and this is it.  Do not squander it.”

Chapter Text

Marie couldn’t possibly put into words the complexity of what she was feeling, but she knew she had to try. She had promised to be truthful, it was just harder than she ever imagined. She hadn’t even been completely honest with herself about all of it. 

Snape waited patiently, unaffected by the growing silence, staring at Marie while she fidgeted, her internal struggle playing out clearly on her face. 

Finally Marie opened her mouth, words coming out at barely above a whisper. “I said I need this….”

“Need what? This job? Or something else.” Snape’s tone was nonchalant, as though he were discussing the weather or some equally inane topic. But he refused to make this conversation easier for her. Although he always delighted in seeing her blush and squirm, he also knew it was crucial for her to be fully honest with herself by articulating exactly what she wanted. What she needed. 

“I definitely need this job, but also…I don’t know.” Just fucking say it Marie. 

“Yes?” Snape drawled. “Use your words.”

With a deep breath and a final wipe of her tears, Marie threw caution to the wind and let go a stream of consciousness. “There’s a lot of stuff I didn’t say before and I should have, but you’re right, my life is a mess and I don’t have anyone else to go to and I can’t deal with any of this on my own right now. And I know I don’t deserve it, but I really really need this job, and I don’t want to leave Soren. And even though I lied to you, it’s not because I think you’re stupid or I wanted to disrespect you. Nothing could be further from the truth. I respect you a lot. I trust you. I feel safe with you, and I know you were trying to help me and I really hate myself for screwing everything up. Because I liked how it felt when you gave me that plan. I didn’t like lying to you, but I didn’t want to tell you the truth because I didn’t want it to stop. I liked knowing someone cared enough about me to make sure I was sleeping and looking after my health and making sure I was taking care of basic things in my life. I liked knowing I could depend on you to look out for me, that you wouldn’t let me get away with things. I didn’t like being sick, but I liked having you look after me, take care of me. No one has ever done that for me, not even my parents. Not like that, anyway. Everyone always thinks I’m so capable and strong, that I don’t need help. But I do. Things are so messed up right now, I can’t even sleep.  And I have anxiety all the time, and I know it is my fault and I want to fix it but I can’t. I don’t know how but even if I did, I still probably couldn’t make myself do it, and I don’t know why. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

Marie paused for a moment because she could feel the tears threatening to come and her voice was starting to crack with emotion. She took a few deep breaths before she continued while Lord Kent sat as still as a statue, his face radiating a rare patience as he listened intently, not wanting to interrupt her with even a single mistimed blink of his eye. 


“I’ve been taking care of myself for a long time. I’ve been doing things all on my own forever and I’m tired. Really tired. I’m completely burnt out and I don’t know what to do. I love my job and I love teaching, and I have so many goals for myself, but the rest of me is falling apart. I can’t do it any more. I’m afraid I’m going to lose everything I’ve ever worked for but I can’t stop it! It feels like I’m on a runaway train and I know it’s going to crash but I can’t make it stop, and it feels too late. I need someone to save me, I need someone else to take charge. I need that...I need you...please.” 

Heavy tears streamed down her face  She had never felt so humiliated in her life admitting to all of that, to being so vulnerable and weak. The confident, fun, outspoken girl who was top of her class in every subject, effortlessly perfect at almost everything she ever did was finally being honest…there was nothing effortless about it. Even if no one else saw just how much she struggled, she couldn’t take it anymore. She had nothing left. She was exhausted. She’d spent her whole life maintaining a perfect image to everyone— her parents, her teachers, her classmates, her friends…but the reality was that she needed someone else to take control, to look after her, to take the responsibility and mental burden off of her. Otherwise, she wasn’t sure she would survive. It’d had been going this direction for a while, but she always managed to do just enough that no one could see how bad it was getting. She always got her work done, but her self-care and her mental health got worse. She coped by dissociating— by reading, and sometimes buying herself things to give herself a small boost. But she was ignoring all of the big issues in her life, and no one was there to say anything and now she was in far too deep to help herself. 

Once she’d dumped everything out in the open, the tears turned into sobs and she collapsed into her hands, a combination of relief and shame. As her body heaved with deepening sobs, her breathing became rapid, and she could feel herself beginning to hyperventilate as the reality of her situation hovered around her, panic threatening to take over.

Snape sat for a while, soaking in everything she’d just said, it was far more than he‘d anticipated. He gave her a minute to cry before he noticed she was working herself up rather than calming down. He stood up and went to her, walking behind her before leaning down over her shoulder, placing a handkerchief in her palm and closing her fingers around it, his hand enveloping hers briefly before letting go.

“Breathe.” His voice was calm, but the word came out with authority. He could see her beginning to work herself into a panic attack and he put a soothing hand on her back as he bent down further and spoke softly near her ear. “Doesn’t it feel so much better being honest, Ms. Cloutier? I will help you. But you have to trust me, and that means you don’t hide anything else, do you understand?”

“Yes, sir,” she said, her body relaxing further with this unexpected display of kindness.  At the same time, a shiver ran through her with the low vibration of his voice and the warmth of his breath right by her ear, and the firm but gentle hand on her back that was both steadying and commanding. Her entire body responded to him, and she was desperate for his comfort and his touch. 

“Good girl,” he said, gifting her a dose of praise as he allowed his other hand to trail softly down the side of her cheek, wiping at a single tear with his thumb before he dropped his hands and sauntered around to face her once more. 

Marie was floating, all anxiety having evaporated as his words and his touch skyrocketed her somewhere into the stratosphere. She lowered her eyes to the floor and tried to ground herself in her body before it was obvious she’d lost control of her senses. 

Once he was back in front of her, Snape put two fingers under her chin and lifted her head. “Look at me,” he demanded as she lifted her tear-filled eyes, his deep voice bringing her solidly back to earth. “It sounds like you benefited from some aspects of your self-improvement plan, but there were several things that you neglected to include because you were afraid to share them. And perhaps you also need more from me than I was offering before, does that sound right?”

So much more, I want so much more. Marie nodded. “Yes, sir.” 

“I can promise you that nothing you tell me right now will affect the way I think about you. I will not judge you for anything you’re admitting to wanting to change for the better. The only thing that would truly disappoint me is if you aren’t fully honest. Everything else, can be dealt with. I will make a plan and we will fix it.”

Marie choked out a sob, her shoulders shaking under him.

“Let it all out, Ms. Cloutier, and I will take care of the rest. ”

Marie could feel herself breaking down, but his words lifted a thousand pounds from her shoulders. She wished she could crawl into his arms and he would just hold her and rock her and tell her over and over again that everything would be alright. 

“Very good.” Snape said, releasing her face and standing to his full height. “Now, I want you to answer me clearly before we move forward. You’ve insinuated that you want me to hold you accountable, that you desire for me to take more control… is that truly what you want?”

A good twenty seconds ticked by before Marie had the courage to answer him. “Yes,” Marie blushed, dropping her eyes again. “I want you to be in charge. I don’t want to have to think about any of it anymore.”

Snape felt a rush at hearing her say the words, but he kept his face still. “Very well, then I will. It takes a lot of courage to admit what you need, Ms. Cloutier, and I don’t take that lightly. I will be more than happy to take responsibility for this…and for you. But you should know if I am in charge, we will do things my way. And as you know, my methods are…old-fashioned. And unyielding. But rest assured, I never fail.”

Marie had a good idea of what his methods would be, and it both terrified and thrilled her. She tried not to let her imagination go too far. She couldn’t understand how she could be so vehemently against the idea in principle, and then so desperate to experience it herself. You’re a nutcase, that’s why. But she couldn’t help it, when she was around him she craved his authority. There was something about giving him control that felt oddly freeing. 

He walked back and forth across the rug slowly until he was back in front of her, leaning slightly against the front of his desk, his hands gripping the edge behind him. 

“Have you ever been spanked, Ms. Cloutier? By anyone?” Snape peered down at her. “I know your parents didn’t believe in it, but at school perhaps, or by a partner?”

“What? No. Never.” The question had caught Marie off-guard, but then her stomach dropped to the floor and her heart rate shot through the roof. For some reason him just saying that word had an effect on her. 

“No, sir. Don’t make me say it again,” he said brusquely, raising an eyebrow in warning. Snape was determined to remind her that he had total control here.

“No, sir.” All she could think about was that stupid charmed slipper, that didn’t count, right? She was trying to be honest but that was far too humiliating to bring up. Especially right now. 

“Shame. Perhaps if you had, we wouldn’t be here right now. But alas, here we are. And since you do not have the benefit of personal experience, allow me to walk you through how it works, in detail. For your personal edification.”


Snape was dragging this out, watching Marie’s face and ears burn dark red. “A spanking is designed to be a very physical reminder that one has transgressed. But it is just as much about the process as it is the outcome.”

He paused for dramatic effect, strolling around the room casually as though he were giving a lecture on moonstone or dragon’s blood.“Even before a single smack has been given, the person on the receiving end is acutely aware that they have done something wrong and are going to be punished. Whether they find themselves over someone’s lap, or bent over a chair, a desk, or anything else, it is a humiliating position to be in. And while they wait for the first strike to fall, every single ounce of their attention is on the fact that they are about to be punished. And by virtue of the fact they are allowing themselves to be in that position— and not fighting it— they are acknowledging—and in some sense, accepting that they have done something to deserve it. It is humbling.”

Marie had to remind herself to breathe. This whole conversation was making her wish the floor would open up and swallow her whole, but she tried to keep her face relaxed and nonplussed, although she was absolutely sure Lord Kent could see right through her. She was also sure, despite the serious look on his face, that he was enjoying every second of this. 

Snape paused again, picking up a small trinket from his bookshelf and examining it briefly before he set it down and continued. “The anticipation is sometimes the hardest part to take, waiting for that first strike to land. Knowing it will hurt and there is nothing one can do… And then, it begins. Whether that is with a hand or some other kind of implement, if done correctly that first smack should be a shock to the system. It should be painful, but not brutal. And in turn, the fear and anticipation only heightens as the sensations hit the brain, along with the unfortunate realization that it is just the beginning and the pain will only get worse. The psychological aspect of this cannot be understated.”

“The person being punished is also forced to realize that they are at the mercy of the person punishing them, and while counterintuitive, this dependence on their mercy forms a bond between them, hopefully one of trust, that the person punishing them will not abuse their position and will know when to stop.  The smacks continue, ideally, until the person is extremely contrite and they are in tears, which is often an important physical release. Then when it finally stops, they are filled with relief and gratitude. Ideally there is reconciliation, words of forgiveness, a clear expression that this punishment was not carried out for vengeance but out of care, and all guilt is hopefully washed away. However, even after the spanking itself has ended, it is still not over, there is no walking out the door and forgetting it, the stinging continues and eventually that is replaced by a deep burn and heat that can last quite a bit longer depending on the severity of the punishment. There is no way to ignore it, it is a continual physical reminder that actions have consequences. Consequences which can be painful, and far far more harmful than the punishment itself, which thankfully, is only temporary. It is a highly effective way of teaching a lesson. One that is not easily forgotten, and if done properly, will serve as a deterrent for quite some time.”

At this point, Marie was completely disassociated from her body. He hadn’t laid a single finger on her and yet she felt like she’d just been thoroughly punished, his words painting such a vivid picture that she couldn’t help imagining herself at every single point along the way. She was horrified when she realized she had zoned out completely and her breathing had become shallow. 

Snape was quietly enjoying the effect his words were having on her, but he made no acknowledgement of it. She might find it titillating—and to be fair, that was what he was going for—but he was also trying to make a point. He also wanted her to know what she was getting into, what she was asking for, even if not directly.  

He returned to his desk with a new confidence in his posture and voice. “Now then. You will tell me everything you omitted the last time,” he looked up and hardened his voice. “You will not neglect a single detail. After I have what I need, I will work on your plan. I think for the moment, we’ll continue with the same general structure— I will give you a daily and weekly list of expectations and goals, you will see me each evening to review your progress. However, moving forward, I will decide what you need to do, and what the consequences will be. Unlike before, this will include any rules I set forth, or anything else I have not specified but decide is in violation of the behavior I expect from you moving forward. General disrespect, poor attitude, certainly anytime you question my rules or decisions in a less than respectful manner. I will be especially harsh if I have to reprimand you for something we have had to discuss before. In fact, I intend to be extremely strict with you until you can prove to me I can trust you…with anything.” He looked down at her with a particularly discerning eye. “Needless to say, any lying will be dealt with particularly severely.”

“Yes, sir. I understand.” Marie felt apprehensive, but this was what she wanted, right? What she’d asked for? But she felt like she’d jumped straight into the deep end without even dipping her toe in first, with no idea what to expect or if she could even swim. At the same time, she felt a sense of relief that she was no longer dealing with all of this alone. 

With a nod of his head, Snape opened his top drawer, pulling out a piece of parchment first, followed by his wooden ruler, placing both of them on the desk. 

Marie stared at the ruler, it was the first time she’d seen it although she’d heard him mention it on more than one occasion. It certainly did look as sturdy as he claimed. The dark wood was thick but smooth and it was definitely over a foot long, probably 18 inches although the gold-painted numbers were worn and unreadable from where she sat. This was a ruler that had been very well-used for many, many years. Her heart rate quickened just at the sight of it. Good lord, Marie. Are you for real? OMG, what is wrong with you!! That shit looks like it would hurt!

“Let’s start with what you did not include before,” Snape said, picking up the quill and leaving the ruler ominously on the desk. “And then I will add anything I feel should be addressed…go ahead.”

Marie spent the next several minutes spilling her guts about her finances, the goblin loans, the fact that her parents had no idea what was going on. He raised his eyebrows several times in disapproval, but kept his mouth shut and continued to write as she spoke. She talked about her dwindling self-care, and her struggles to be honest with herself and others. She talked about how she’d neglected her friends and parents, slowly pushing everyone away until she became like an island. Afraid to tell anyone the truth about what was really going on with her. That she felt shame that she’d let the goblin loans get so out of hand and that she was so overwhelmed she was paralyzed with anxiety. 

“We are going to take care of that with the highest priority. You will sit in my study next Saturday and we are going to go through every single detail of your finances. Every loan, every account record from your vault, and we’re going to come up with a payment plan and a budget. You cannot allow your parents to lose everything they have because of your lack of financial responsibility.”

“Yes, sir, I know.”

“Good. Have you been receiving notices from the goblins? When is the next payment due?” He looked up from his parchment.

Marie’s face turned bright red. “Um, I don’t know, sir.”

He put the quill down and his face went into a deep scowl as he leaned forward. “Pardon?”

“They don’t know where I am…no one does. I mean, not the details anyway. The notices go to my old address, I imagine…but I didn’t leave a forwarding address, so who knows.”

Snape had to suppress the urge to immediately pull her up from the chair, throw her over the desk and give her a good dose of the ruler while he lectured her on personal responsibility. He closed his eyes and took a breath, pinching the bridge of his nose and reminding himself that he had promised not to judge her. “Do your parents know where you are?”

“No, sir. Not exactly.” Marie said sheepishly. “I didn’t want to face them with everything. I kind of just, decided to come without really telling anyone any details. I’ve been away from home for a long time…I don’t think they really care where I am, if I’m being honest.” 

“I see. Well, we will remedy that quickly. And when we contact the bank tomorrow, we will make sure that the goblins have an updated address for you so that you can receive what I am sure are some very sternly worded letters about making a payment on your loans.”

Marie nodded. “Yes, sir.”

Snape shook his head back and forth. “My, my, Ms. Cloutier, we really have gotten ourselves into quite a bit of trouble haven’t we? It’s no wonder you’re not able to sleep.” He followed it with a few disapproving clicks of his tongue. 

She blushed at the patronizing scold, her stomach clenching in a not so unpleasant way. “Thank you for helping me.”

“Don’t thank me yet, I have a feeling that while you are going to feel a lot better in the long run, it is going to be quite an uncomfortable journey for you in the short term.”

Snape wrote out a few more notes on his parchment before he looked up again. “What else haven't you told me?”

“I think that’s all, sir.”

“Oh, that’s all, is it? Tens of thousands of galleons in overdue goblin loans, ignoring your friends and family, going off the grid to avoid your responsibilities, not to mention a terrible track record of dishonesty and lies. But that’s all?” Snape looked up from the paper as he shook his head, boring into her eyes with an intense look. He paused for a moment before he spoke, making direct eye-contact with her until she had to look away. “Think very carefully, Ms. Cloutier, anything you omit will not fall under the amnesty that you’re receiving for everything else. If you don’t own up to it now, there will be consequences down the road.”

“That’s everything I can think of. I promise.” Marie felt chastened by his little rant, it really did seem much worse when he laid it out like that, and even if he didn’t shame her directly, he was clearly unimpressed. 

“Well, there’s certainly plenty here to work with. Not to mention your dreadful attitude toward the rules and abysmal self-care,” Snape opened up his drawer and pulled out another piece of parchment. “You are in dire need of some structure, Ms. Cloutier. How you have managed to survive this long without complete ruin is beyond me. It’s honestly a miracle you ended up here, and not a moment too soon. Fortunately for you, I am more than accomplished at helping the woefully undisciplined get back on the straight and narrow, although I dare say you will be quite the challenge.”

Marie was burning with shame, but in the way that also made her want more. He wasn’t being cruel or mean or angry, just patronizing and almost…paternal. At the same time, he did it in such a way as to make her feel confident he was going to make things better. She knew it was nuts, but it was comforting. 

Snape didn’t say a word or even look up, but for several minutes he continued to write, his quill flying across the page without a moment of hesitation. Despite the speed of his hand, every single letter of his elegant script was perfectly formed, the space between each word and each line meticulously calculated and executed with precision. When he got to the bottom of the parchment, he picked up his ruler. 

Marie held her breath as she waited to see what he would do with it. 

For several more minutes, he tapped the ruler mindlessly onto his left palm as he leaned forward in his chair, reading through his document with rapt attention to detail, occasionally bringing it down to the parchment to better focus on a piece of text. 

Marie’s heart was in her throat, she was tuned in to every single movement he made. Finally, after what seemed like the slowest five minutes of her life, she watched as he placed the ruler on the bottom of the parchment and used it to draw two perfectly straight parallel lines, approximately two inches apart.

Once he was pleased with his work, Snape set down the ruler, replaced his quill and looked up at Marie, surprised to see her eyes wide with a combination of confusion and the tiniest bit of disappointment. 

“This is a contract, Ms. Cloutier. I want you to read it and consider it carefully before you sign it. While I hope you will accept my terms, and sign it willingly, I want to be clear that you may—at any point in time—choose to exit from this contract, and I will tear it up and that will be the end of it. It will in no way, ever, affect your employment. This is a contract between you and me, on a personal level, that exists outside of your job. If you choose not to sign it, that is perfectly acceptable. However, if you do choose to sign it, that means that you are agreeing to my terms on our…arrangement.”

“The self-improvement plan?” Marie asked, innocently. 

“I think we can both agree that this arrangement goes well beyond that. Yes, it will include elements of your self-improvement plan, but with this contract you are also granting me consent to make decisions that affect you in your personal life. To take a certain amount of authority over you, and to accept the consequences I give to you. Essentially everything that happens after you sign this is at my discretion, not yours. That being said, I want to make it clear that entering into this arrangement is done with your full consent. Consent that can be revoked at any time. However, once that consent is revoked, the contract is null and void, and our personal arrangement will end. Permanently.”

Marie was slightly confused. “So if I change my mind, it’s over.”

“Yes. But as I said, this will not affect your job. However…” He leaned forward with his finger out in front, speaking slowly and clearly and with his harshest tone yet. “If you ever put Soren at risk, or deceive me in such an egregious way again, I will terminate your employment, and it will have nothing to do with whether or not you’ve chosen to engage in this contract.”

“Yes sir, I understand.” Marie could feel her heart beating practically outside of her chest. She hadn’t seen what was on the paper yet, but she knew already she was desperate to sign it, to move things forward. 

“Once we have both signed it, it will go into immediate effect. That means I will take charge and things will change quite drastically for you. We will start with a clean slate. However… I’m telling you now, once we begin, I am not going to be lenient with you. I will never degrade or disrespect you, but as you are such an independent person, it might challenge you quite a bit to relinquish some of that control. I know that you are an adult, however, until you can prove to me you’re ready to act like one, I will deal with you in the same way I would an errant child. Outside of your responsibilities toward Soren—which will remain outside of the purview of this contract for obvious reasons— you will have limited autonomy. When I tell you what to do, you will do it. There will be no arguing or whining, I expect to be obeyed at all times, immediately. If you do not, you will suffer the consequences, which I can assure you, will not be pleasant.”

What are you getting yourself into, Marie? “I understand…I still want to do it.”

Snape hesitated for a moment and then cleared his throat before he began again. “You should also know that despite the obvious power dynamics inherent in this contract, this is strictly a platonic arrangement. I am acting as a mentor and a disciplinarian, and I take those responsibilities seriously. This is not a sexual arrangement, and I will never cross those boundaries with you. It should be obvious, but I want to be clear on the matter.”

Marie wanted to die. “Yes, sir. Of course.” Purely platonic my ass. The sexual tension between them had been palpable for a while now. But if he wanted to pretend that this was merely some kind of fucked up “mentorship program,” she’d play along. 

Snape looked her in the eyes. “Ultimately, the objective of this is to improve your quality of life, Ms. Cloutier, so that you do not continue to live in such a state of anxiety and burnout that your health fades away and you lose all motivation to pursue your goals and passions in life. It is also my intention for us to rebuild trust, and for you to feel cared for and supported whilst you learn how to live a more disciplined life— something you are in desperate need of and have courageously asked for my help with. I expect there may be moments where you feel frustrated or upset, but you should never feel taken advantage of, coerced, or abused. If you ever feel for a moment that this is not what you want or agreed to, you should put an end to things immediately. Do you understand that?”

“Yes, sir. I think so.”

“Good. Now if you have any other questions, you may ask them.”

“So we start with a clean slate?” Marie said. “Even after everything that happened…after all the lies and mistakes I’ve made?”

Snape raised an eyebrow. “Why? Would you prefer that we didn’t? It seems unfair to punish you for past transgressions when you and I had no agreement in place.” He was trying to be fair, even if he believed she’d benefit greatly from one of his bespoke, over-the-knee guilt-cleansing sessions. 

“I thought you said these are consequences, not punishments.” Marie replied cheekily, a small smirk on her face. 

Snape eyed her with a look of warning before he continued. “Yes, well, things have changed. Unfortunately you were incapable of possessing the honesty and maturity required to uphold the type of agreement that called for self-accountability and adult consequences. So now you are being put on a plan that puts me firmly in charge, and yes, that means I will punish you. Perhaps—if you do well—in future you may be upgraded to a less punitive plan, but it appears we have many many years of lack of discipline to make up for and I think we’re quite far from a reality where you’re going to be able to hold yourself accountable with any reliability. We shall see. For now, you answer to me, and I strongly believe that you will benefit from a firm hand and consistent discipline, two things that have been woefully lacking in your life for quite some time.”

Snape could see her eyes go wide and her pupils dilate, and he was pleased to know he had this kind of effect on her, even if it was just with his words. He was going to enjoy this immensely, although he didn’t want to make that obvious.  “However, if you feel you’d benefit from a sound punishment to cleanse you of your guilt, I will gladly oblige you. But only after the contract is signed and your consent is in place. So think carefully. I am offering you a reprieve, and a chance to start fresh, but if that isn’t what you need, we can make other arrangements. Just know this will be the only time you ever have a choice in the matter. Although I will caution you—I will not be lenient with you. Your list of infractions is…impressive.”

Marie wasn’t sure why she brought that up and now she was feeling overwhelmed and silly for mentioning it. Because you want to know what it’s like, you simp. You want him to tell you he’s disappointed in you and then punish you for all the stupid shit you’ve done so you’ll finally feel better, so you can feel like you’ve earned your clean slate. 

“Now then, take this contract to your room, read it…carefully…think about it, and bring it back to me when you’re ready. If you change your mind or do not wish to sign it, then we won’t speak on the matter again. 

“And I can keep my job?”

“Yes. I feel that is only fair. I don’t want you to feel manipulated into engaging in this contract out of fear of professional repercussions. I want to emphasize that this is a decision you make of your own free will. You may also break it at any point in time without reprisal. However, once it is broken, that is the end of it. You do not get to break it every time you’re in trouble or don’t like a consequence, it would completely defeat the purpose.”

Snape stood and walked over to where she was sitting, offering a hand to help her up. Marie took it and stood, still unable to make eye-contact. Once she was fully upright, he handed her the rolled up parchment. “If you decide to sign it, we will continue with our 8pm meetings each evening after Soren goes to bed. I will give you your new rules and expectations at the next one...if that’s what you choose.” He put a single hand on her shoulder, softening his face and looking into her eyes. “And I promise, things will get better. I will take great care with you, but your days of running amok are over. So if you want help, it is here. The choice is yours.”

Marie wasn’t ready to leave him, and she leaned into his touch, desperate for every second of connection she could have. But almost as soon as she let her body relax against him, he pulled away, moving toward the door and finally opening it in a less than subtle invitation to leave. 

He stood at the door, waiting for her to walk through it. “Goodnight Ms. Cloutier. Although I am disappointed in the events that brought us here, I am extremely proud of your honesty this evening. I know that was difficult, but I hope you can rest a little easier tonight knowing that—if you so choose— everything is going to get much better. ”

This time, she felt like she deserved his praise and she allowed herself to bask in the delicious feeling those words gave her. “Yes, thank you, Lord Kent.”

 “Now go to bed at a decent hour, I imagine you must be exhausted.” He gave her a slight eyebrow raise and a patronizing look to go with it. “Off you go.”

“Yes, sir.”

He closed the door and went immediately for the bar cart. 

You’re a degenerate. He lifted the stopper on his crystal decanter and poured out a shot of his finest whiskey. Snape knew he had probably gone too far with that self-indulgent contract, but he knew she wanted it, she craved his attention and wanted him to take charge. At best he was slightly overstepping his role, at worst he was abusing his authority as her employer…but he was rarely wrong about these things. If any woman was screaming out for someone to take control, it was Marie. She’d practically asked for it—literally— she’d begged for him to take charge, hadn’t she? Not to mention he could think of at least a dozen reasons off-hand to justify putting her across his knee, and maybe now he’d finally get the chance. As much as he’d been tempted to do so at several points over the last few weeks, he wouldn’t dream of doing so without consent. She was a grown woman, after all, and he wasn’t a complete barbarian. 

He tilted his head back and swallowed a generous shot of whiskey before pouring himself a proper three-fingers and returning to his desk, leaning back in his chair as he reflected on the entire situation. 

Over the years Snape had engaged in this kind of arrangement on several occasions with witches who craved his authority and structure, who begged for his discipline and enjoyed his harsh correction. Sometimes it occurred within the context of a sexual relationship, sometimes it was purely disciplinary. He found he enjoyed both. But what he craved more than anything was the control— he got a thrill from the consensual yielding of power from an adult witch who wanted to submit to him. He also reveled in a challenge…he liked to have a goal to work toward, and he particularly loved it when there was a real reason to punish someone— some justice to be meted out or a behavior that needed to be modified in some way for their own well-being. Fixing a bad habit, putting a stop to self-destructive behavior—that was particularly rewarding. It was a good deed, it was necessary. And he could justify this to himself; he wasn’t hurting women, he was helping them. It was never about causing pain— he wasn’t a sadist. Not at all. He loathed cruelty and would never ever engage in anything that he thought bordered at all on abusive, it was too triggering. He’d watched his father beat his mother mercilessly, and he never wanted to be anything like that. He was a man who craved order, control, and predictability, there things that had been desperately lacking in his early life. For him, discipline was the ultimate solace. A gift, even.

But there was another darker part of him that enjoyed the domination aspect as well. He loved to extract submission slowly, not based on fear or intimidation (that was far too easy and something that only weak men would do), but on trust and a mutual desire for a power-exchange. Ultimately, Snape was a cerebral person more than a physical one, so for him it was about the intellectual exercise, the psychological pursuit, and the type of deep submission that only happened as a result of genuine connection and trust, a far more exquisite prize to obtain.

Snape had searched for that for years before he’d finally given up on it, his life becoming more complicated as the war approached, along with his growing discontent at never finding a partner who could give him what he wanted. He was never at a dearth of witches who wanted him to tie them up and flog them, but that bored him. It did nothing for him. He craved depth that he couldn’t ever achieve in any of these vapid encounters. He wanted the feelings to be authentic…and mutual, the power-exchange real rather than contrived. He wanted to live it, not just play pretend. 

So he’d given all of it up, years ago, refusing to allow himself to even participate in these kinds of arrangements if it was only going to end up in frustration and disappointment. He had barricaded this part of himself away ages ago, and this was the first time in many many years he was opening the door again, and he hoped he hadn’t made a grave error in judgment. 

Since he survived his death, he’d been completely celibate, not even visiting those places in his mind that might open the gates and fuel his desires. He’d successfully avoided these kinds of thoughts and fantasies for years before Marie showed up, but now he was consumed.  Her very presence had awakened him—her voice, her eyes, the pout of her lips, and her clean but feminine smell that lingered in the room long after she left. The way she blushed and subverted her eyes when he scolded her or raised an eyebrow in disapproval— it was intoxicating, and it was made all the more lovely by the fact that she was so clever, independent, and self-assured. And although he was usually a man with impeccable self-control, he had faltered, and in his weakness and desperation for a genuine connection, he’d just opened a Pandora’s box that he wasn’t sure he would ever be able to close again. 

Whatever he did, he wanted to make sure he wasn’t coercing her. There was a very real power-dynamic that made him feel uncomfortable, the fact that he was her boss (and she clearly needed this job, desperately), not to mention the fact that he was easily 15 years her senior. Whenever he’d engaged in the past, it was with random witches he’d met outside of his life at Hogwarts, never anyone for whom he had direct responsibility or any other kind of outside relationship with. He’d been in his early 30s the last time he’d done something like this, and age had never been an issue. Now he was 44, not an old man by any stretch, but certainly bordering on creepy for cavorting with a woman who was easily 15 years his junior. Although in wizarding years, an age gap like that would mean less and less going forward, not that he was thinking too far ahead.

He knew if he were truly being ethical, he would have never started this, but at this point, he didn’t quite care. She was of age— far, far past the age of consent at 29— and she had essentially initiated. Fine, perhaps not initiated, but she’d been enthusiastic about engaging in discussion, flirting with him constantly, and dropping numerous hints about her desire to have him punish her. And he just had an intuition that this was going to be better than he could imagine…he just hoped she was really on the same page. He would go slowly, in fact, that was his specialty anyway, but he knew he’d eventually have her begging him for everything she wanted, even if he knew the best part of it was still a long way off. But if there was one thing Severus Snape did well, it was the long game.  One step at a time. Patience.

He swirled the amber liquid in the crystal tumbler, taking another long sip before closing his eyes and allowing his imagination to wander these paths for the first time in years. First he would teach her to love and accept his discipline, and with that the ability to trust him, completely. He would gently push her limits, and eventually she would learn to embrace and crave all manners of submission. In his greatest fantasy, he imagined how he might do things with her he’d never done with anyone else before. He had always wanted to explore Legilimancy and mind magic with an intimate partner, but this required an enormous amount of trust and deep submission, and he knew they may not ever get there. But the idea of controlling someone’s body and pleasure from within their own mind had always been a dark fantasy of his, and few people had the skills and ability he did to do this safely. Not to mention the connotations with dark magic he was desperate to avoid. This is why the consent was so important to him, it was integral. If he started this off in the wrong way, he would never be able to enjoy it. He would never steal someone’s agency, it had to be freely given or it was fruit from the poisonous tree, rotten and foul.

Control yourself. He didn’t want to rush ahead. He didn’t even know if she would sign his consent form. For all he knew, she would take one look, be appalled and that would be the end of it. Which was fine. He only wanted this if she gave her enthusiastic consent. If not, he would understand and respect that and go about boarding up those vulnerable parts of himself again. He’d promised her that her job wouldn’t be contingent on this and he meant it. He would be disappointed, but he would keep his word and do everything possible to ensure she didn’t feel uncomfortable. 

But he couldn’t help imagining the possibilities if she would just take this first step. He couldn’t be wrong…he was never wrong. She wanted this too. You better hope so, you pervert, or she’ll probably leave and report you to the authorities. 

Marie didn’t even remember how she got to her room. It was like she’d blacked out and awoken half an hour later laying on her bed without knowing if anything she remembered was real, it was all hovering in some kind of haze. But she looked down and she saw the scroll of parchment, still rolled up, laying beside her on the bed. She was both desperate to read it and terrified to open it. What had she done? A contract? It was mental

She laid there for several more minutes replaying pieces of the conversation until she finally felt that she was back in her body, convinced it was all real. Finally, she couldn’t resist. She grabbed the parchment and unfurled it, her breathing shallow and rapid as she worked to decipher his script: 

Section 1: The Rules

Both parties agree to the below rules to be in force within disciplinary agreement. Both parties agree that the below rules are subject to change at any time with both parties full knowledge beforehand. 

1. No back-talking, bad attitude, or other forms of disrespect.
2. No disobeying anything that Lord Kent requests (within reason). There will never be requests for sexual favors, or anything that violates any personal boundaries, morals, or beliefs. 
3. Absolutely no dangerous behaviors including, but not limited to, reckless use of magic, being without a wand, wandering after dark alone, or anything else that puts mental or physical health at risk.
4. Never hide any dangerous behavior undertaken by Soren at any time, maintain Lord Kent’s house rules at all times
5. Obey the curfew time, lights out and sleep at or before 10:00pm on weekdays.
6. No lying or any form of dishonest communication or behavior.
7. Always follow the budget (to be detailed), make any payments on time
8. Maintain healthy habits and self-care such as eating properly, having regular exercise, engaging in daily hygiene routine, etc.
9. Do not withhold any important information (personal, professional, financial, etc.) from Lord Kent
10. No procrastination or delay when Lord Kent gives a task or an assignment
11. Communicate effectively, and respectfully. Nightly meetings at 8pm until further notice.

           
I, Marie Cloutier understand that failure to follow the above rules may result in the consequence of Lord Kent’s choosing. I, Marie Cloutier also understand that these rules have been set forth by Lord Kent because they are in the best interest of myself, my health, and my future.

Section 2: Consequences

I, Lord Alistair Kent will hold Marie Cloutier accountable if the above rules are broken. I agree to always maintain a calm and controlled environment and demeanor prior to imposing any of the below consequences, and I agree to never make her feel degraded or humiliated. I further agree to only impose the following consequences fairly and responsibly.

The consequences that both parties agree to are as follows:

1. Corporal punishment: Spankings may be carried out in either the over- the-knee position or the over a piece of furniture such as desk, chair, sofa, etc with either a hand or implement of Lord Kent’s choosing. The severity of the spanking will always fit the offense committed and the length, and severity, of the spanking will remain solely up to Lord Kent.

2. Corner time: Corner time may be carried out in any room of Lord Kent’s choosing and the length of the corner time will fit the offense committed. 

3. Reflection time/Early Bedtime: The length of reflection time, to be carried out in the bedroom, as well as the specific instructions given will fit the severity of the transgression and failure to follow instructions will result in additional consequences.

4. Removal of privileges: Lord Kent will remove privileges if a misbehavior has occurred that he feels warrants this consequence, however this will never interfere with completing necessary employment responsibilities nor will it remove guaranteed time-off, however certain restrictions may be put in place. 

5. Writing assignments: There may be times where lines, essays, journaling or other assignments may be given in an effort to enforce a particular lesson. These will be completed satisfactorily and on time or it may result in additional consequences.
                                                 
Both Lord Kent and Marie Cloutier agree to uphold the rules, and consequences, named above as part of this disciplinary contract. Furthermore, both parties fully acknowledge that they have both consented to this agreement and can withdrawal that consent at any time either formally or informally at which point this contract becomes null and void. 

Signed:

________________________

Marie Cloutier


________________________
Lord Alistair Kent

Lord Kent had told her to read it carefully, and she probably should have read it more than once, but before she lost her nerve, Marie picked up a quill and signed it. You’re insane. She couldn’t believe she had agreed to all of this, but she felt almost high on endorphins. She wished she could bring it to him now, but she’d wait and give it to him tomorrow so it at least appeared like she’d given it some thought.

Marie set the signed parchment on her bedside table and rolled back onto her bed, contemplating his offer. Does she start with a clean slate, or does she let him punish her for all of the lies and silly behavior. No sane person would willingly choose to have their ass beaten. But she desperately wanted to feel like she had earned a clean slate. She wanted to feel the relief of the guilt wiped away. He’d respect that, right? Not to mention she was oddly curious about what it would feel like. She knew it would hurt, but it couldn’t be THAT bad. She knew the man well enough to know that he would never do anything to really hurt her, although she also knew he wouldn’t hold back. Her stomach felt nervous even thinking about it. She tried to remember what the slipper had felt like. She knew it stung, but she couldn’t actually remember the pain, just the really nice feelings that came after it. You’re a total crazy person. Sick. Clearly dropped on your head as a baby. 

But she couldn’t help smiling. She read and reread the contract a dozen times, smiling like an idiot. Wishing she could just bring it to him now and get started. But he’d made a point that he wanted her to really reflect on it.

Determined to get off on the right, she changed into her pajamas and turned off the light, so giddy she could barely sleep. 

Chapter Text

Marie woke up before 7 and looked over at her table, the parchment she’d signed rolled up and staring her in the face, a reminder that none of this was a dream. The giddy feeling she’d had last night was starting to fade, and now she could feel the anxiety creeping in. Her fingers trembled slightly as she got dressed and went downstairs, hoping she’d get a few minutes alone with Lord Kent before going for her morning walk, this time properly bundled up in her thicker set of robes. 

When she came down to the parlor, the fire was going but Lord Kent was nowhere to be seen, although the Daily Prophet was folded up next to an abandoned cup of tea, so it was clear he’d already been sitting there and was now off somewhere probably doing something useful. Did the man ever sleep?

She buttoned up her robes and walked out the door, the contract burning a hole in her pocket as she walked through the grounds. When she completed her loop on the path, she paused and realized she didn’t remember any of it, her mind so deep in her own thoughts that she’d been on autopilot.

Breakfast was shockingly normal given the events of the last several days. Soren was surprisingly chipper and excited that he was going to be back in the classroom with her this morning.

“May I please be excused?” Soren said, looking over at his father as he finished his glass of milk. 

“You may. Did you make your bed?”

“Not yet.” Soren replied sheepishly. He was hoping his father wouldn’t remember and Marie would swoop in and put it to rights with her wand as she normally did.

Snape hardened his features. “You’re to do that every morning, no excuses.” He turned to Marie. “Ms. Cloutier, do not assist him with magic, he needs to learn how to keep his room tidy like any other boy his age.”

Marie looked over at the man and nodded. “Yes of course.”

“Soren, be quick about it,” Snape said as he glanced at his watch. “And don’t forget to brush your teeth. You had better not be late to class either.”

“I won’t,” Soren whined slightly as he climbed out of his chair.

“Pardon?” Snape said, unimpressed with the boy’s tone. 

“Yes, father, I’ll be quick,” Soren quickly amended. 

“From now on you’ll make your bed before breakfast. I won’t have you rushing around before class. You should be settled, calm, and ready to learn when Ms. Cloutier comes in to begin her lessons. Get moving.” Snape gave a stern look and flicked his head toward the stairs.

“Yes, sir!” Soren said as he rushed up the steps, knowing he was going to have to hurry if he was going to get to the classroom on time.

Marie looked up at Snape over the top of her coffee. “New rule?”

“I don’t want him spoiled, Ms. Cloutier. He’s 7 years-old, I hardly believe asking him to make his bed each morning is treating him like a house elf. He’s perfectly capable of keeping his room tidy on his own. So do not assist him. He needs to learn how to take care of himself without magic.”

“No, I agree. I’ll make sure I get him up a few minutes earlier tomorrow so he has time.” She smiled at him briefly, but looked away before she felt awkward, putting all of her attention on the remaining hash browns on her plate. 

Snape nodded his head and took a sip of tea. He was well-practiced at hiding his emotions, and was doing his best to pretend everything was just as it always had been this morning. He would say nothing about the contract, not wanting to bring it up in case she had decided she wasn’t interested. When he finished his tea, he dabbed at his face briefly with his napkin and then stood. “I hope you will take everything at a suitable pace today, Ms. Cloutier. If at any point it becomes too much or you feel unwell, you should end your lessons and send Tinny to fetch me.”

“No, I’m feeling back to normal. Really. That won’t be necessary.”Come on, Marie, give it to him. Why are you hesitating? 

“Let’s hope not. But I don’t want you to feel pressured to continue if you feel you need more time. I mean it.” His voice was full of concern, but he emphasized the last bit with an extra stern look. 

“I won’t. I promise. I definitely don’t want to scare Soren like that again.” Although having you carry me off to bed was quite enjoyable. Marie had to work not to smile at the thought. 

Snape nodded. “Indeed.” He turned and headed toward the dungeons.

It’s now or never, Marie! “Wait!” Marie said loudly, her heart beating so loudly she could hear it in her ears. 

“Yes?” Snape drawled, turning around to stare at her. 

Marie got up and went toward him, pulling out the signed scroll of parchment. “Here,” she said, handing it out to him. “I’ve signed it.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Did you take time to read it carefully?”  He kept his tone flat but inside he felt an explosion of joy. 

“Yes, of course.” Maybe carefully isn’t the most accurate word. 

Snape slipped it into the inside pocket of his coat. “Very well. Then we will discuss everything this evening after Soren is in bed.”

Marie just stood there, the adrenaline wearing off now that she’d handed it off. She wasn’t quite sure what he was thinking, but she’d hoped he’d be a little more enthusiastic. “OK...well, um, see you at lunch.”

When he saw the subtle disappointment move across her face, Snape added: “Well done, Ms. Cloutier. You’ve taken an important first step.” He didn’t want to overload her with praise, but it was clear she needed some kind of acknowledgement, and his words had the desired effect and she beamed in response before he turned abruptly back toward the dungeons. 

Marie wanted to squeal in delight- she had no idea how she was possibly going to focus on anything else today, all she could think about was her 8pm meeting with Lord Kent. 

The day felt like it went at a snail’s pace for Marie, but as each hour passed she became more of a nervous wreck, and she started to wonder if she’d made the right choice. Even though she’d been so sure when she’d signed it, now she was having second thoughts. What are you getting yourself into? Maybe you shouldn’t do this. She reminded herself that she could break the contract at any time. But what if it is too much? What if I can’t handle this? Maybe you should just tell him you changed your mind. 

All through dinner she was completely distracted, engaged in a heated battle in her head and oblivious to the conversation Soren was leading at the table. 

“Ms. Cloutier? Did you hear me?” Soren asked, snapping her back to reality. 

“What? Oh, I’m sorry Soren, what were you saying?” Marie had been so lost in her own thoughts she’d completely zoned out. 

“Are you OK? You’re not going to pass out again, are you?” Soren said with concern, the small scowl on his face looking shockingly like his fathers. 

Marie smiled at him. “Of course not. I am perfectly fine. Please don’t worry, Soren, darling.”

Snape gave her a matching scowl. “Perhaps you should go to bed right after supper and rest.”

“No! Really, I’m fine! I feel 100%. Just a lot on my mind.”

“I hope you are telling the truth, Ms. Cloutier. It would be very unfortunate, otherwise.” This time his eyes flashed in an unspoken warning. 

Marie blushed slightly. “I swear, I am fine.”

Snape held her eyes for several more seconds before he looked over at Soren. “You may be excused. Go take a bath and get ready for bed. I’ll be upstairs shortly.”

Soren let out a disappointed whine. “But I want Ms. Cloutier to put me to bed, she hasn’t done it in forever.”

With a sharp snap of his fingers, Snape stared the boy down. “Don’t whine. Ms. Cloutier is coming back after quite a serious illness. She’ll tuck you in another night. Not another word, off you go.”

“I really don’t min—“

Snape held his hand up, stopping Marie mid-sentence. “It’s not up for discussion.” He turned back toward his son. “Soren, say goodnight to Ms. Cloutier.”

With a small sigh of resignation, Soren pushed in his chair and walked over to give Marie a big hug. “Goodnight, Ms. Cloutier!”

“Goodnight, Soren. I’ll tuck you in tomorrow, OK?”

Soren nodded and stayed another moment in her embrace. “I’ve missed you. I’m glad you’re better.”

“Me too.” Marie gave him a small kiss on the top of his head. “I’ll see you in the morning, OK?”

The little boy scurried off to the stairs and Marie turned to look at Lord Kent. “I’m perfectly fine, really.”

Snape kept his face stern. “You will take a few moments for yourself to rest, relax, and settle your mind. I can practically hear your thoughts screaming at me from here.  If you need more time to consider things, then do so. There’s no rush. We can meet tomorrow evening, or a week from now, or never. It’s up to you. But this isn’t a decision you should take lightly, so if you’re not ready to move forward, or you are having second thoughts, then we won’t. It’s as simple as that.”

“What? No! I’ve been waiting all day for this meeting, I’m just nervous.”

He searched her face for signs of deception but found none. He didn’t want to rush her into anything, in fact he was already second-guessing himself for presenting her with such a contract in the midst of all of the emotions and turmoil of the day before. Maybe you’re pressuring her and she’s afraid to say so.

Snape set his napkin down on the table and stood. “I will be in my study at 8pm. If you need more time, you should take it. I mean it, Ms. Cloutier.”

“I don’t need it. I’ll see you at eight.” She made a sad attempt to smile, but she could tell he was unimpressed. 

With a nod of his head, Snape made his way upstairs to Soren’s room to hurry him along in his bedtime routine. 

For once, Marie craved a glass of wine or something to settle her nerves, but the wine had been suspiciously lacking on the table tonight. Inconvenient. I’d much rather go into this meeting with a little bit of liquid courage. 

So instead Marie went to her room and tried to clear her head. She laid back on her bed and attempted to read, but couldn’t focus, having made it through three pages before she realized she didn’t remember a single word. Finally she got out a piece of paper and wrote herself a Pro/Con list. When she finished, the only thing in the Con list was “I’m scared/don’t know what to expect. Come on Marie, this is what you want. Be brave. You trust him, don’t you? And she did. She couldn’t explain why, but she trusted Lord Kent to take care of her. She knew he’d be strict with her, but she also knew he’d never hurt her. In fact he was overprotective of her if anything. It was all going to be fine. Just breathe. Chill the fuck out.

She sat on her bed and did a breathing exercise, something she’d learned in a mindfulness class she’d taken in grad school. She thought about what her teacher had said about envisioning your mind as a small pool of water. When you allow your mind to still, the water becomes clear, everything settles to the bottom and you can see clearly in all directions. When you force too many thoughts, you stir everything up and the water becomes muddy and opaque and it’s impossible to see anything.  Let your thoughts settle. Let each one fall to the bottom like a piece of sand until everything is clear again.

With each deep breath, she stilled her mind, and after fifteen minutes she felt immensely better. And now that her thoughts were clear, she had no doubt about what she would do. 

At 8pm on the dot, Marie knocked confidently on the study door.

“Enter.”

Her heartbeat quickened slightly as she reached for the handle, but as soon as she stepped in the door, a feeling of relief washed over her. As usual, Lord Kent was sitting behind his desk, and she couldn’t help a fleeting thought of him as a Headmaster who had called her in to lecture and punish her. And she smiled briefly. 

Snape cocked an eyebrow. “Something amusing, Ms. Cloutier?”

Marie schooled her face quickly. “No, sir. Not at all.”

“Take a seat.” He gestured to the small chairs in front of his desk and she slid into one. 

Once she’d settled, Snape reached into his coat and pulled out the parchment. “Do you have any questions or concerns you’d like to address before I sign this?”

“No, sir.” 

“Shall I read it out loud just to be sure you haven’t missed any details?”

OMG, no! How horrifying!! Marie was pretty she would actually drop dead if he did, so she shook her head. “No, sir. I read it carefully. Several times.”

“So you are agreeing to these rules. And these consequences.”

A flush went up her neck as she thought back to what was written on the page. “Yes, sir.”

“Are you sure? As soon as I sign this, it will go into effect. Of course you may revoke your consent at any time, but that will be the end of it. Do you understand?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Very well.” Snape made a dramatic gesture of picking up his quill and signing his name with flair, the scratching of the quill tip on the parchment causing goosebumps to appear all over Marie’s skin. 

With his wand, Snape duplicated the document, leaving the original on his desk and holding the copy out in front. “Come get your copy. You’d do well to memorize these rules, I will hear no excuses about not knowing or remembering what they are. From this moment forward, even the smallest infraction will be dealt with swiftly. Am I clear?”

“Yes, sir,” Marie said as she stood up and reached across the desk for her copy, a move that forced her to bend slightly over the desk in a not so subtle reminder of the position she will likely find herself in if she steps out of line. Sneaky.

“Now sit. We’re going to talk about your recent behavior and my expectations moving forward.” 

Marie obeyed immediately, realizing that his tone was far more stern than it usually was. He wasn’t angry at all, but he definitely meant business and she was starting to get nervous. 

“I promised you the opportunity to start with a clean slate. However— even if I am not punishing you, we will address each and every one of your misdeeds before we move forward. Is there anything you wish to say before we get started?”

Marie was starting to get nervous again and she shook her head. “No, sir.”

“Let’s start at the beginning. We can go chronologically if you prefer. It might be easier to keep track of things this way.” Snape pulled out a piece of parchment on which he’d obviously scribbled some notes. When he unfurled it, it was at least three feet long. 

Jesus- is that whole thing a list of my fuckups?  “Yes, sir, whatever you think is best.”

Snape smirked as he glanced up from the page. “My, my we are being so polite this evening, Ms. Cloutier. Amazing how one’s manners instantly improve when there’s the threat of real consequences. Perhaps there is hope for you yet.”

Oh, he was being smug, but Marie bit her tongue, she was trying to be on her best behavior. Even if she enjoyed the way it made her feel when he was being so patronizing. You really do have some screws loose, Marie. 

“Now then, let’s start with you questioning me, and screaming down the hallway after me on your first day. A violation of Rule #1 No backtalk and no disrespectful language. You should know that you always have the opportunity to share your grievances, however, you will do so politely, and in the proper time and place.  And while I don’t expect you to call me “sir” all the time— you will when we are in this room or when I am disciplining you. Is that clear?”

“Yes, sir.” Easy enough. There was something about being in this study, with him behind the desk, that made it practically automatic for her. He didn’t have to work very hard at all to establish his authority in this room (not that he did in any other room), it was apparent to anyone who walked into it that this was his domain and he would tolerate nothing less than full respect. 

“Next- ah yes. The day you blatantly defied my request to send Tinny to get me, seeking me out in my lab to satisfy your own curiosity. Rule #2- you do not disobey me. When I tell you to do something, you will do it. If I tell you not to do something, you will not. Seems fairly straightforward, and yet I imagine this one will be quite a difficult one for you.” 

Snape paused a moment before he continued. “You should know I do not make rules or requests without reason. Your life will be far simpler and more enjoyable if you obey me. However, the only exception is if you ever feel that what I am asking you to do is somehow a violation of your morals or boundaries. I can’t imagine that will ever be the case, but if it is you will come to me and let me know in a respectful way and we can discuss it. Outright disobedience, however, will always be punished. With far more than a few minutes of reflection on the naughty step.” He smirked to himself at the memory of her on that tiny stool. 

“Yes, sir.” 

“Next, you not having your wand the day Soren climbed the tree. I think we’ve quite discussed that ad nauseum, but of course you’re always to keep your wand on you. A nice example of Rule #3- you will never put yourself or others in danger or do anything to compromise your health or wellbeing. I take this rule extremely seriously, and you will be punished severely if you do. This includes behavior such as refusing to eat out of spite. Going on long walks in the cold without proper clothing. Going out into dangerous places after dark or any other daft behavior that puts you at risk. I will have no tolerance for that whatsoever.”

“I understand.” Marie was blushing furiously at the memory. 

Snape put the parchment down and looked at her. “I understand that you were upset that you were not getting my full attention at the time, and while I will strive to give you what you need, there will be times where I will be busy or distracted, or otherwise preoccupied. The response to this, if you feel like you need something more from me, is to communicate properly.  Which is the perfect reminder for Rule #11- Communicate effectively and respectfully. You are too old to throw tantrums in an effort to get what you want. If you ever, ever act in such an egregious way again, you will succeed in getting my attention, but rather than kind words of reassurance, it will be with my ruler across your backside. Is that clear?”

Marie’s face was burning an even deeper red now, just thinking about how silly she’d acted. It was admittedly childish, even if she’d felt justified at the time, but she was horrified imagining what that must have looked like to him. 

“And if you ever make yourself sick like that again, due to your own immature behavior and poor decisions, I will tan your hide every night for a week. And I am not being facetious. Your life above all else, is the most important thing, so don’t you ever be so flippant with your health ever again. Do you understand?”

“Yes, sir.” She felt tears welling in the back of her eyes, something about his words making her feel cared for in a way she hadn’t felt in a long time. “I’m sorry.” 

Snape softened his voice slightly. “I know it can be difficult to take care of oneself when one is not in the best state of mind. Which is why I will do my best to help you find a routine and time to focus on this. I will be hard on you when you neglect your self-care, but it is because I value you and your health is important to me. And to Soren as well. So even if you aren’t in a place where you are able to care for yourself for the sake of your own well-being, you will do it anyway. If you do not — Rule #8 by the way—  I will be displeased and there will be consequences, but I can assure you, any purposeful action you take that results in any harm to you, and you will be punished most severely. Believe me, you do not want to imagine my wrath in that situation.”

Marie had no doubt he meant that- and even though it came with threats, she knew it was meant to reassure her that someone was looking after her. And that felt really nice. 

“Now then, what next?” Snape looked down at his parchment. “Ah yes, now we are coming to your most deplorable behavior yet.  Rule #4- ‘Never hide any dangerous behavior on Soren’s part. We have discussed this at length, but I will take a moment to reiterate it, just so there’s no confusion. I make the rules in this house, and with good reason. Your job is to follow them and uphold them for Soren as well. I trust you to deal with minor misbehavior in the classroom, although I still do not wish for you to hide it from me— but anything serious, any behavior that puts him at any risk or which you know is in gross violation of one of my rules, and you are to come to me immediately. It is not your job to protect him or keep secrets with him. Ever. Have I made myself clear?”

“Yes, sir. I understand completely, I will never hide anything like that from you again.”

“I need to be able to trust you, Ms. Cloutier. This is especially true as it pertains to Soren. I hope at this point you know I will never be unreasonable with him, but I need you to do your part to uphold the rules of this house.”

Marie nodded. “Yes, sir. I know.”

“Good.” Snape perused the list once more. “Now then, let’s discuss the financial issue. Rule #7. Tomorrow when Soren is taking his afternoon rest, you will contact your bank, update your address, and have all of your documents sent here. We will go through them together on Saturday and I will work out a budget and payment plan. If you so wish, I will also help you with a financial plan for your savings and future goals. I will decide what that looks like once I’ve seen all of your financial documents. I will continue to pay for your expenses, and there will be no arguing with me about that. You will state clearly how much you’ve spent. Any arguing or lying, and there will be consequences. Is that clear?”

“Yes, sir.” She cringed internally at the thought of what those financial documents were going to look like after all of this time, she was sure the interest was insane and she had no clue how much debt she was even in now except she knew it was bad. 

“As for your self-care, you will follow a routine as we had you do before. You will get up, do some kind of relaxation or exercise, get yourself ready, and have lights out by 11pm. We will keep the check-list. I expect you to brush your teeth, do your skin care routine, whatever else is a part of your general hygiene routine. I will also insist that once a month at least, on your day off, you do something related to self-care. Get a massage, go to the salon, whatever it is witches do to make themselves feel good about themselves. Something kind for yourself.”

“Once a month? I really don’t think that’s necessary.” Marie never spent her money on herself in that way- she couldn’t even remember the last time she’d been to a salon, she always just spelled her hair herself. It was easier and far cheaper.

“Did I ask for your opinion, Ms. Cloutier? I did not. If you speak back to me one more time, there will be consequences. Now that’s enough. I make the rules, and you obey them. I hardly think one appointment for self-care each month is a violation of your moral code, even if it is a rather telling statement on your self-worth.”

“Yes, sir.”  She hated to admit that he was right, but he was. She’d never spend money on herself in that way, it felt far too indulgent. Especially since she didn’t have the money.  Although she was dying to ask him when the last time was that he took time out for self-care. Or did the rules not apply to him? Hypocrite.