Archive of Our Own ^beta

Alan entered the dark apartment not bothering to turn on a light, throwing his keys carelessly on the table. He sunk down onto one of the chairs at the kitchen table with a tired sigh staring into the dark void. After some time of sitting there motionlessly, he let out a deep frustrated sigh. The apartment felt empty, not like a home anymore. Wen had come and taken his things a few days ago and now the once lively and warm home was just a shadow of its former self. Cold and impersonal. Alan moved his hand to loosen his tie and unbutton the top buttons of his shirt which were suffocating him. He felt tired which had nothing to do with the long day he had at the bank.
He couldn’t help but wonder if it was his fault that Wen fell out of love with him. If it was something he did or didn’t do. Where it all went wrong. In the end, their home had turned into a place of unspoken and hateful words, each conversation turning into a fight, because they couldn’t let go of their pride. It was like they had lost the ability to communicate with each other. What hurt the most was Wen sleeping with him out of pity apparently after they had already broken up. He still thought that the excuse was bullshit.
Logically thinking he knew that situations like this happened to people, it was nothing uncommon or new that a partner fell out of love or one side realized that they are better off as friends. But why had it happened to them? Five years of happiness were just gone in a blink of an eye. What had the chicken rice seller, he hadn’t?
Alan sighed and rubbed frantically over his burning eyes beneath his glasses. There was no point in reminiscing over the past. It was gone, he had to move on, everything was said and done. At least they had a clean cut now since they had talked things through and Wen had given him his ring back. Once a promise, it held no meaning now. He would never forget the sorrow he had felt and the double meaning the words had held when they had a heart-to-heart at the BBQ place. How the words were slowly sinking in that there was no way back, there was no hope for them anymore. It was over and he had to wrap his mind around it.

Alan stood up from his place at the table starting unbuttoning the remaining buttons of his shirt while walking into the bathroom to take a shower. He stopped at the mirror looking at his tired reflection and the dark circles under his eyes. He didn’t know when the last time was that he had gotten a full night’s sleep. He was a mess.
It was a vicious circle. He tried pulling himself together and getting over Wen, but at the end of the day, he was wallowing in self-pity about his broken heart again. Nothing would change that way, it wouldn’t make Wen magically love him again. He knew that. Alan just needed a little bit more time to come to terms with everything that had happened in the last few months. At least that was what he told himself.

He stripped off his clothes and stepped under the hot jet of water to relax his aching muscles from sitting all day at the desk at the bank. At least he was alive. He thought about the elderly woman who had visited him at the bank again today to go through insurance documents to transfer her assets to her son after her death because she knew her time was running out.
Mrs. Hong had told him that her son – Gaipa, didn’t know she was in critical condition. She didn’t have the heart to tell him with his father already gone. It was too cruel. From the documents, Alan knew that her son was about his age. She shared with him how it broke her heart to leave him alone, how he was such a good and bright kid with so much love to give and nobody there to love him. She lamented how Gaipa recently got his heart broken by his long-time crush. A pain he knew too well and could relate to. It pained her so much to leave him all alone with nobody there to take care of him. She loved her son dearly, he could feel that. So what right had he to cry over lost love, at least they were alive and well. It was time to move on.

But moving on with his life was easier said than done. Feelings were complicated. One can know that it is stupid to be hung up on an emotion, but yet he couldn’t free himself from feeling a certain way. It was frustrating and suffocating. His head was telling him something different than his heart.
He felt empty day in and day out and suddenly the year was gone in a blink of an eye. There were only a couple of hours left of the old year. Alan sat alone at home with nobody to celebrate the coming of the new year, not feeling like celebrating with his friends.
Maybe it was the right time to let it all go. He had to move on finally. Alan looked at Wen’s ring laying in front of him on the kitchen table, his fingers unconsciously playing with it. Empty beer cans were scattered around him. It was a parting gift from Wen or better said he hadn’t bothered to take the beer with him. Alan never was much of a drinker, even though he could hold his liquor pretty well. He also preferred wine over beer. He stared at the beer can which read Full Moon Beer, he guessed that Wen bought it because it reminded him of the chicken rice seller – Jim, he told himself.

Had Alan been too naive in his wish to build a stable home for Wen and him, to provide him with a good life? He had worked so hard to get the promotion to give Wen a comfortable home. Was it because he was never home that they drifted apart without him noticing? Absence makes the heart grow fonder – or shatter it in thousand pieces apparently. Had he been pushing too much? The money he had was suddenly nothing worth to him anymore other than that he still had a place where he could live, but it wasn’t home. There was a saying that home is where your heart is. He didn’t know anymore where that is. He had no home.

Alan moved to take another sip of the beer, but the can was empty. He made a noise of disapproval and slipped Wen’s ring on his finger and looked down at the two rings on his hand. The weight felt strange. Today would be their last day. Tomorrow he would start over. New year, new beginnings. He let out a sigh and stood up. He felt hungry and he needed more alcohol. It was New Year’s Eve after all. One last night in memory.

Alan took his keys and slipped on his shoes to go out and get something to eat and more beer, even when he preferred wine.
He wandered around aimlessly. He didn’t really have a destination in mind, he just walked around and found himself at the beach after a while. The warm wind felt nice on his face. He looked at the people having fun with their friends and families around him. Last year he had been happy, too. Wen and he had eaten Shabu and were doing silly things while waiting for the new year to come.

Suddenly he was hit by a wave of dizziness. He couldn’t say if it was because of the beer or because he had not eaten all day. He shook his head to clear his head, dots dancing in front of his eyes. Maybe drinking on an empty stomach wasn’t the best idea after all. It was time to find something to eat. Alan walked down the street looking for a restaurant that was still open. He spotted a shop across the street that was still open and moved to cross the street when a sudden loud honking noise made him look up.

The next thing he knew was that he was laying on the street and everything felt fuzzy. Pain was engulfing his body. His mind was too cloudy to register what was happening. He heard people shouting, somebody was trying to talk to him, but he couldn’t understand them. His vision was blurring around him. He tried to move, but he couldn’t. Somebody touched his arm talking to him. He wanted to answer, but his eyes suddenly felt too heavy to keep them open. Then there was nothing.

When he woke up he was in the emergency room of the hospital. He groaned when pain shot through his head.
“Alan!”
He opened his eyes and came face to face with Gong and Wen – and to his dismay Jim. The presence of the other man irritated him.
“Alan, are you okay? Does anything hurt?”
“I’m fine,” he answered brusquely. Why was he here and why was that chicken rice seller here? Ah right, he had some kind of accident, that much he could remember.
„The nurse said you were hit by a scooter while crossing a street. You were drunk, Alan. Care to explain any of this shit?“ Wen asked judging.
„So what does it matter that I was drunk? I’m not allowed to drink?“, he shot back, annoyed that this was the first thing Wen cared about. It wasn’t his business anymore.
„Stop it you two,“ Gong interfered, before things could escalate any further. “What’s done is done. Listen, Alan, you broke some of your fingers and have sprained your foot so you need to wear an orthopedic brace for a few weeks. Yes, I know that sucks, so we talked and Wen agreed to be your caretaker for that time being so you two better get your shit together. I know the situation of you two is complicated at the moment, so get over it.”
Alan looked at Wen. Wen looked back at him with a blank face, but there was still worry in his eyes despite him trying to look indifferent. At least he still seemed to care somewhat about him. He probably should have jumped at the thought that Wen was taking care of him, but somehow he didn’t like the idea. He promised to get over Wen in the new year and the new year was already here despite him having missed it.
“Fine, alright,” Alan said defeated. He was tired of fighting anyway. “Thank you.”
But that didn’t mean he felt happy.

They talked for a few minutes in a more civil manner before Gong had to leave. Wen went to get him discharged and Jim took the chance to also excuse himself saying that he was taking his leave and leaving the rest to Wen. After a while, Wen came back with a wheelchair. He helped Alan to change into some clean clothes that Wen had gotten from their apartment beforehand. The other man had to give him back the apartment keys yet, Wen was still holding on to them. He didn’t know what to make out of that. On the way out of the hospital, they picked up some painkillers. All in all, it was one of the most civil interactions they had in weeks. Wen even apologized for snapping at him when he had woken up. He had even offered to stay with him in the apartment for the first few days, but Alan declined, telling him that he would stay with one of their friends instead. It would be a mistake to spend more time with Wen than necessary now. It would make things worse again.

Time moved on and days turned into weeks. Wen came over every now and then, helping him with household chores and grocery shopping, and dropped him off and picked him up at work. Things got better. He still felt bitter every now and then, but he started to cope with everything.
Then he got a call that Mrs. Hong had died. It marked an end and a new beginning even if he still didn’t know it yet.

He couldn’t say why he decided to go to Mrs. Hong’s funeral, but something inside told him to go there to introduce himself and express his deepest sympathies to Mrs. Hong’s son personally. It felt right to pay his last respects to her. It wasn’t unheard of him to go to a funeral of a client, he had done it a few times before. But it never had felt so personal. It didn’t make sense why he felt differently about Mrs. Hong’s passing, maybe it was because she had told him so much about her son.
When he arrived one of the first things he noticed was how many people there were to send Mrs. Hong off. It seemed like she was loved by many which didn’t come as a surprise to him. Mrs. Hong had been one of a kind, always speaking her mind, but also caring. He slowly limped the steps up to the funeral hall looking for her son, wincing from the discomfort he felt from walking. He wasn’t in his best condition today and the weather was hot and humid. It was an exhausting combination. He looked around the reception hall looking for her son, but he had no idea what he was looking like. He asked a woman if she could point him in Mr. Gaipa’s direction. She told him to wait for a minute while she got him.

Shortly after, a devastated-looking man came over to him looking at him confused. Alan forgot how to breathe for a second, seeing the young man for the first time. There was so much pain in his eyes. He could relate to that even if it was under different circumstances. Despite everything he looked quite handsome and gentle with his sun-kissed skin. Surprised by his reaction he composed himself before speaking up. Suddenly he felt kind of shy and out of place.
“Are you Gaipa, Mrs. Hong’s son?” he asked awkwardly. It was strange meeting a person for the first time at a funeral.
“Yes.” His voice sounded so soft. A random thought crossed his mind, that his voice must sound nice when he was laughing. He wanted to see him laugh happily one day.
“My name is Alan,” he introduced himself giving him his business card. “I’m from Krungthep Thai Bank. I’m in charge of your mother’s account.”
“I see,” Gaipa said softly, taking the card from him before looking absentmindedly over at his mom’s funeral picture next to the laid-out coffin.
“I’m sorry for your loss.” Something protective stirred in him looking at the young man, but he couldn’t put a finger on it, so he shook it off. They didn’t know each other after all, but still, they seemed to be kindred souls. “And… Sorry for meeting you while I’m like this,“ he said referring to his injuries. He could have taken some sick days, but he felt it wouldn’t do him any good, he rather kept himself busy. He didn’t want to have too much time to think.
“It’s totally fine. I appreciate your visit.” Gaipa told him with a polite yet kind smile. He looked so broken. Alan wished he could do something for him to take his pain away. He thought about everything Mrs. Hong had told him about Gaipa. He understood why she talked so highly about him even if it was her son. He couldn’t help but wonder what Gaipa was normally like when he wasn’t full of sorrow.
Alan passed the other man the envelope with his personal condolences. “This is from me.”
Gaipa looked at the envelope and swallowed. “Thank you.”
“After the funeral, I must request an appointment with you. Your mother purchased a number of insurances. I need to get some additional documents from you.”
Gaipa sighed heavily, his eyes getting duller, but he didn’t seem to be too surprised, “Sure. After… I’m done with the funeral. I will visit you at the bank.” He could only imagine how busy Gaipa must be after the passing of his mother, there were so many things that he had to take care of.
“All right. Sorry for having to request your time.”
“No worries,” Gaipa assured him.
“Sorry for your loss again,” he said with a little bow.
“Thank you for coming. Please take a seat.”
“Thank you,” Alan said bowing again. He wanted to say more, but he didn’t find the right words, so he turned and walked away to find a seat.

He slowly limped to the seating area. He quickly grew tired when standing or walking for a longer time.
“Let me help you,” he suddenly heard a familiar voice in front of him. He looked up surprised to find Wen in front of him. He hadn’t noticed that somebody had approached him.
“Wen… What are you doing here?”, he asked surprised.
“I’m helping Jim. He’s catering the funeral. Gaipa and Mrs. Hong are close friends of his.”
“I see.” He didn’t know how to feel about that. It seemed almost ironic that Jim and Gaipa were friends. Jim seemed to be everywhere.

His body was aching everywhere so he let Wen help him to find a place in the seating area to listen to the monk's chants. He looked at Gaipa who was sitting at the front next to Jim. Gaipa’s body slumped more into himself with every passing minute. Watching him break down slowly was painful, but it wasn’t his place to help the other man. The man’s shoulders were shaking when sobs wracked his body when he was no longer able to hold back his tears. He watched Jim trying to comfort him to no avail. He bit his lips when a wave of emotion overcame him. He looked at the floor when he felt tears well up in his eyes. It wasn’t his place, yet he couldn’t help but empathize with the other.

When the ceremony was over he looked for Wen, just to find him talking on the phone while working on something on his laptop. It was probably for work. He couldn’t help but find it disrespectful so he left on his own. He was aching all over. The day has truly been tiring, the heavy atmosphere of the funeral was getting to him. He left the temple groaning at each step from the pain. He should have taken some painkillers with him. He reached for his phone to check how far the driver was away. In the process, his clutch cluttered to the floor. He tried to pick it up without bending down. Suddenly there was somebody by his side reaching for it. He came face to face with Jim who looked at him unsure, but with no animosity on his face. Alan tensed looking away not wanting to talk to the man. “Thank you,” he said brusquely, fumbling with his phone. He didn’t know what to do.
He heard Jim sigh next to him and saw him fidget awkwardly out of the corner of his eye.
“Please accept my thanks on Gaipa’s behalf,” the other man said eventually.
Alan looked up surprised.
“Do you want me to call a ride for you?” Alan didn’t know what to do with Jim’s kindness.
“Don’t worry about it. I have requested a ride.” He held up his phone for Jim to see.
“Let me keep you company then,” Jim offered, not wanting to leave him alone. Alan looked at the other man, who was also looking back at him. He seemed as uncomfortable with the situation as he was. What was Jim up to? There was no reason for him to be nice to him, not after their little confrontation at the restaurant where he had punched him in the face after seeing him with Wen.
“Are you two together now?” he asked matter-of-factly. Jim huffed, still fidgeting next to him.
“We still aren’t.”
Alan looked at him defying, suddenly overcome by anger. “If it hadn’t been for you, we would not have broken up like this.” He knew this wasn’t true, but he needed to blame somebody.
Jim snorted, holding his gaze. “But I wasn’t there back then. I have only known Wen for less than 6 months.” He gently reminded him. Alan pressed his teeth together, looking at the floor. It was true. He knew that Jim wasn’t the reason he and Wen had broken up. He had promised to get over it, but when he saw Jim he couldn’t help but lash out at him.
“Nonetheless, I must apologize to you.” Alan looked at him surprised not understanding why the other was apologizing. On the other hand, he started to see why Wen liked the older man so much. Alan knew he was in the wrong, but his pride couldn’t take it, he couldn’t find it in him to apologize so instead he said indifferently: “You may leave. My ride is here.”
Jim looked at him defeated, stepping back to let the ride through. They didn’t exchange any more words, but Jim still helped him to get into the car when he saw him struggling with his broken fingers and the crutch while getting in.
Alan sighed when the car drove away. Jim was so reasonable that it was frustrating. He swallowed hard, leaning his head on the headrest. If they had met under different circumstances they may have become friends.

On the day of Mrs. Hong's cremation, Alan came back to the temple. Gaipa’s speech really pulled at his heartstrings. He had heard that Gaipa’s father also had passed away a few years prior but hearing the retelling of the story from Gaipa directly broke his heart. Gaipa seemed like a family man who liked being surrounded by people he loved.
“If mom was still with me here and comforted me, she would say: Even though I’m no longer here with you, the love you have for me will last forever. Mom had a song she liked. When she was alive, she asked me to sing for her. Up until now, I have one regret: I haven’t been able to sing it to her yet. So I would like to take this occasion to sing this song, which is her favorite for the first and the last time for her.”
He couldn’t stop himself from shedding some tears while he watched Gaipa sing his mom’s favorite song while trying not to break down completely and slowly losing the battle. He wanted to hug him and tell him that better times would come.
He sniffled next to Wen who didn’t seem to be moved at all. Later Alan watched Gaipa cry clutching the picture of his mom in his arms while Jim held him gently, trying to give him some comfort. At least he had somebody on his side.
When he and Wen arrived at their former home, Wen gave him back his keys telling him that he had no use for them anymore. Another ending. But for some reason, it didn’t hurt unlike before. He smiled slightly at Wen who smiled sincerely back at him for the first time in a long time. At that moment he knew things were going to be alright.

Two months later Gaipa scheduled an appointment with him to go over the documents. Alan felt nervous when the time of the appointment came nearer, not that there was a reason to be nervous. When the awaited knock on his door came, he cleared his throat and sat up straight before calling his client to come in. Gaipa immediately apologized for not coming sooner, but he was busy keeping the business going, so he had little to no time for the visit. They went over the documents one after another, he explained them to Gaipa and showed him where he had to sign.
“You have to sign here as well,” Alan said not taking his eyes from Gaipa. Gaipa was luckily focused on the documents on the desk in front of him so he didn’t notice that Alan was staring.
“Alright,” Gaipa said looking for a pen to sign after reading the documents. He hesitantly picked up one of Alan’s pens on the desk and looked questioningly at him. “This?”
“You can use it,” Alan told him reassuringly.
“Okay,” Gaipa said starting to sign the documents that Alan had shown him before. “Right here?”
“Yes, sir.” Alan couldn’t stop the smile forming on his lips. The man was cute. Gaipa was sticking out his tongue slightly while singing the documents. He looked so endearing. “Right here, too.” He tapped his fingers on another page.
“Okay.”
When Gaipa had finished signing the documents Alan took them with a smile, checking that everything was in order, “I think we’re all set here, Mr. Gaipa.”
“Sure,” Gaipa said taking a sip from his water, looking sheepish.
“I’m sorry the headquarter asked for more documents.”
“That’s totally fine,” Gaipa told him smiling brightly. “Please take it from here Mr. Alan.”
“Of course,” Alan told him still looking at him. Gaipa suddenly seemed very shy and flustered, taking another sip from his water. “How refreshing,” the other man rambled. Was he nervous? Alan nearly went crazy inside from the effect the other man had on him.
“Right.”, Alan said nervously. What were they even doing?
“May you please excuse me now?” the smaller man asked. He didn’t want to end the meeting, he still wanted to talk to him, but there was no more reason to keep him there any longer. Gaipa stood up slowly.
“Mr. Gaipa,” he said quickly without thinking about what he wanted to say. Alan kind of panicked for a moment thinking about what to say.
“Yes?” Gaipa quickly sat back down looking at him hopefully. Gaipa’s gaze burned on him.
“I just changed my phone number,” he said carefully, making Gaipa look at him confused, but still attentive. “Can I please have your Chat ID?” He tried to stay calm, but his heart was racing.
“Yes?” Gaipa said softly, blinking at him confused, but there was also something in his voice he could not put a finger on.
He continued, “In case the headquarter asks for more documents. You can just take a photo and send it to me.”
“Ah, of course,” Gaipa said still smiling, getting his phone out of his pocket and holding it in front of Alan.
“QR code?”
“Yes.”
“Let me scan it,” Alan said picking up his own phone and scanning the code. He had to keep his fingers from shaking.
“Okay then,” Gaipa said hesitantly, “If we are done here, I’ll be on my way.”
“Sure. Have a great day,” he told him sincerely.
“Thank you. Thanks for your hard work.” Alan couldn’t help but notice that Gaipa’s eyes were shining like the sun. On the funereal there was so much sorrow and tiredness in them, his eyes had looked dead, but now they were twinkling happily at him. He was glad that Gaipa seemed to feel better by now.
“No Problem. Goodbye.”
“Goodbye.” Gaipa bowed to him slightly before going to the door, suddenly he turned to him again, noticing that he still had his pen in his hand. “Sorry. I have your pen,” he told him. Alan couldn’t help but smile, taking the pen from Gaipa’s hand. In the process, he slightly brushed Gaipa’s fingers which send a spark through him. This really wasn’t the time. He also remembered vividly how he had lashed out at Jim for accidentally taking his pen with him when he had visited him trying to get a loan.
“Right,” he said, and like that Gaipa was out of the door. He felt giddy with excitement. He wanted to see the man again. He looked at his phone not being able to contain his own smile, he must look crazy. He felt something he hadn’t felt for a long time. He shook his head. Gaipa was so cute. Alan looked at his phone again getting an idea. He send Gaipa a quick text to check if there were on the same side. He nervously stared at his phone. A few minutes later his phone vibrated with a reply from Gaipa: Sure.
His heart was beating like crazy in his chest. He couldn’t believe what he had just done. He really must have gone insane.

A few weeks later he scheduled another meeting with Gaipa, because there were more documents he needed Gaipa to sign. He was kind of glad to have another reason to see the other man. His leg had finally healed and the brace had been removed, but he was still limping a little bit. When he arrived at the location at the beach they had scheduled to meet, he was surprised because it was a chicken rice food truck. It really looked cozy with all the fairy lights. He checked the message again that he was indeed at the right place and walked on.
He was startled when he came face to face with Wen.
Wen looked at him softly. “Alan.”
“What’s up?” he said as a greeting, taken by surprise.
“Are you here to eat?” This must be where Jim hat set up his new Chicken Rice place after he had to move out of the old building at the market. It made sense, Gaipa was friends with Jim after all.
Alan thought for a moment, feeling caught, but decided to tell the truth anyway, there was nothing bad about it. “I’m here to meet a client for his documents.”
Before Wen could say more a cheerful voice called from behind Wen. “I’m sorry. I don’t have time to drop by the bank.”
Alan couldn’t help but smile, seeing Gaipa approach. He seemed to have hurried here. “Don’t worry. I was just running errands in this area.”
“Ah, cool,” Gaipa sounded relieved. “Do you know each other?” Gaipa looked at Wen and him curiously not knowing about their connection, yet.

Wen and he looked at each other, he was not ready to tell Gaipa that Wen was his Ex who broke his heart into thousand pieces. Wen looked at him expectantly leaving it to him what he wanted to tell Gaipa.
“This is Wen, my friend,” he said finally. It felt good to say this out loud like this. Friends. Wen seemed to be happy enough with his answer, it was like a felt something shift in him. A moment later Jim popped up behind Wen.
“Uncle Jim,” Gaipa greeted him. Jim joined their little group looking happy and relieved at Alan, probably having heard what he had told Gaipa.
“Would you like to join us for dinner?” the older man offered him.
Alan felt kind of unsure looking at Wen for help.
“Please join us,” Gaipa pushed him going full puppy mode and looking adorable. “We can go over the documents.”
Who could say no to that? Gaipa looked so hopefully at him.
“Well then, can I have Chicken rice with no blood cube, please?” he asked Jim.
The older man looked at him kindly “Of course.”
“Thank you.” From the corner of his eye, he saw how amused Wen was about the situation. He was sure that he could read him pretty well and knew what was up. Despite their history, now that they had overcome everything and they could move on as friends there was a newfound lightness between them. He smiled back at Wen before turning to Gaipa.
“Please.”, Gaipa said pointing to a free table.
“Sure. Have you got all the documents needed?” he asked while sitting down at the table.
“I think so. Can you please…” Gaipa said trailing off and showing the documents to Alan.
“Sure. May I?”
“Recheck for me.”
“May I?”, he asked again for permission before taking the documents. They were bumbling again. He started to look over the documents when a new teasing voice appeared.
“A banker, I see,” the man said to Gaipa before wai-ing him. “Hello, sir.” He must be an acquaintance from Gaipa.
“Hello.” Alan retorted also placing his palms together with his fingertips touching his nose.
“Will you get a free credit card if you date him?”, the man asked Gaipa teasingly. Gaipa flushed getting nervous. “Date, my ass, Leng!!!!” he scolded his friend.
“Don’t. You’re blushing.”
“He’s here for my documents.”
“You are always furious when you blush.” Alan couldn’t help but feel amused by the exchange. It pleased him with what he was hearing, so maybe he really had a chance with Gaipa. It gave him some hope.
“Leng, come back here.” a woman called in a scolding manner. “Don’t poke your nose in their business. Come here.”
Leng sighed before giving another wai, saying goodbye to them, and going over to his girlfriend and baby. It was amusing.
“Sorry about him.”, Gaipa told him still blushing.
“That’s okay,” Alan reassured him laughing lightly, before going back to rechecking the documents. It was a bit overwhelming. A few minutes later Wen brought their food over. Alan kept rechecking the documents until Wen hold a glass of water out to him. It was like a peace offering. They looked each other in the eyes, communicating without words. Wen’s eyes told him that he is glad that he had moved on finally. Alan took the water from him, thanking him with a smile. Wen padded his shoulder encouragingly before going back to Jim in the kitchen. It was like getting his blessing and approval of his choice.
He kept going over the documents with Gaipa while eating, answering the other man's questions. When they had finished neither seemed interested in cutting their meeting short, so they went from business to personal questions, enjoying their time together. It was a beautiful evening. He could feel Gaipa’s shy look on him and he was giving him shy reassuring smiles back. When it was time to go home Alan worried his lips. He still wanted to see Gaipa, but not for work-related things, so he gathered all his courage while he walked Gaipa to his car.
“Do you maybe want to go out with me again in the future?” Gaipa looked at him kinda surprised, but not averse. “Not for business-related things, just us if you know what I mean…,” Alan added quickly, pointing between them. His heart was pounding loudly in his chest. He really hoped that he hadn’t read the signs wrong. He didn’t know what he would do when Gaipa rejected him. But nothing would happen if nobody took the first step.
Gaipa suddenly smiled brightly at him, tilting his head, his eyes shining with mirth “Are you asking me out?” the smaller one asked in a flirting manner.
“Maybe,” Alan said shyly, blushing furiously and starting to fidget, before pulling himself together. “Yes, yes I’m asking you out,” he confirmed confidently.
“Ohh, is that so,” the other man cooed. “Well, how about next week then? I think I will manage to make some time for you.” Gaipa said giddily, rubbing his neck with one hand. Alan could have cried with how happy he felt right now. He couldn’t hide his relief and happiness.
“It’s a date then.”, he confirmed.

It felt so unreal that after months of sorrow and pain, he was now standing here in front of this beautiful, kind man. As much as he still cared about Wen, he was ready for a new beginning. It was too soon to say what the future had in store for them, but he hoped their future would have each other in it. Thinking about it, it was thanks to Mrs. Hong that they were standing here together. Even if she was no longer with them, she still had to manage to bring two broken souls together for a new beginning, so that they could be lonely together which wasn’t lonely at all.