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Regarding The Workings Of A Zoo

Summary:

Damian collecting a series of increasingly non-domesticated animals and naming them after his siblings.

A drabble for 105 subscribers on ao3 and 100 followers on Tumblr!

Notes:

Just wanna say, thanks again <3

 

Tumblr post inspiration

 

Warning: This fic has gone through one (1) round of editing and that too by sleep-deprived me.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

“What. The fuck.”

“Tt. I knew I had accurately named my turtle.” Damian threw some more turtle feed into the pond. “Drake is a most excellent turtle. Much unlike his predecessor.”

Tim turned to Dick. “Are you seeing this?”

Dick rubbed the back of his neck. “Seeing what?”

Damian replaced me with a turtle.”

“It’s not my fault that his movements fire faster than your neurons, Drake.”

Dick gave an insecure smile. Tim glared at him and folded his arms.

“What about the chicken?” Steph asked, popping another grape into her mouth from the large bowl she was holding.

“Her name is Todd.”

Dick’s snort quickly turned into a cough.

Jason looked up from the frog. “Excuse me?”

“You’re excused,” Damian simply said, patting Drake the turtle’s head as it neared him.

“What’s the frog then?” Jason frowned.

“Brown.”

Steph choked on a grape. Tim thumped her back. “Now that’s mean,” she said once she stopped coughing.

Damian shrugged.

“Who am I then?” Dick asked, sounding curious but hesitant at the same time.

Damian looked at him straight in the eye and declared, “Meerkat.”

The four of them bulged their eyes at him.

“And where is it?” Dick questioned.

“He’s on his way. I needed time to prepare a room for his mob.”

“What are we, a zoo?” Tim scrunched his nose.

“Tt.” Damian rolled his eyes, closing the turtle pellet jar. “I must take my leave now. I have school. Do not touch my pets while I am away.”

They watched as he walked away haughtily, nose stuck up in the air.

“Tell me why Bruce allowed him to have pets again?” Tim voiced out loud.

“He survived a League attack without killing anyone. It’s actually a pretty big achievement,” Dick replied.

Jason groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose. “This family is fucked up in so many ways.”

Steph kicked him in the shin. “You’re one to talk.”

 

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Dear Mother,

I am required to write this letter to you as part of my school assignment, but not post it. It should be handed back to my so-called “teacher” at the end. I did not originally have a topic, but after much deliberation with Father, I finally settled upon writing about my new pets.

This isn’t meant to be shown to anyone, so if someone reveals this information, they will be found by GCPD in a street corner as a cold corpse at precisely midnight there will be consequences.

Firstly, I have Drake the turtle. He is a very nice and gentle creature with eyes that constantly smile though they are dark. I’ve named him Drake because he is slow and careful, much like the real Drake’s strategic nature. Drake the turtle at first did not like me when I neared him at the beach. However, once I showed myself as a friend and proceeded to help him with the plastic bag around his shell, he did not like leaving my side.

Secondly, I have Todd the chicken. From the times I have seen him at the manor and the rare occasions I go to his safehouse when injured, I have observed him constantly worrying and fretting about the tiniest thing. He worries whether someone has eaten, or drunk water, or has a scratch, or even a paper cut. Grayson once described him as a “mother hen”. And Todd the chicken, when I saw her, she was fretting over her chick who was rejecting a worm. Immediately, I made the connection.

Then, there is Brown the frog. I told her that I named him Brown because he was as ugly as her, but that was not the truth. Once during our other school assignments, I discovered that frogs symbolize rebirth. Brown truly made up her own identity, by herself, might I add. I… I still struggle with my past, Mother. I am ashamed to admit but…

In any case, Brown has gotten over that obstacle. I wish she would teach me how. Brown the frog on the other hand, is extremely bubbly and never stays still. It was accurate of me to name him after Brown.

Finally, there is Grayson the meerkat. Grayson is confused, he does not know if it is an insult or a compliment. He does not know that meerkats have one in their mob look out for danger, constantly keeping the others safe. I’ve seen Grayson scan an environment like the arcade before letting me roam free. He is worried, and does not know how else to show. I am hoping he will learn to calm down once in a while. Like Grayson the meerkat who always joins in to play with his mob no matter what.

I know you are not very fond of pets, Mother. But I still think about Noora, the bird you once gifted me during my stay at Nanda Parbat as a child. I am thinking of getting another bird, but… I am not so sure. I feel worried that I might lose it if I get another bird. Much like how I lost Noora to Grandfather. I hope you are keeping her grave clean as I am not there to do so myself.

I appreciate everything you’ve done for me, Mother. Including bringing me to Father’s family. His whole family.

Kind Regards,
Damian

Notes:

Tumblr: quotidian-oblivion

The batfam find Damian's letter: Admire

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