Archive of Our Own ^beta

The night was starting to wind down and as the music became slower Yasha sat on the side of the dance floor drinking one of the frothy things that Beau had concocted. The conversation she had had with Beau, Caleb, and Veth early had left her in a contemplative state, despite the heavy fog weighing on her brain from all the rum. What was life after the Mighty Nein? She had rolled different ideas around in her head for the better part of an hour, trying to find any outcome that felt right. Any outcome that was possible. And everything she could come up with included Beau. Always Beau.

She watched as the party started to thin out and as couples started to dance. She watched as Beau went to stand with Fjord on the other side of the floor. Her eyes always managed to find Beau in a crowd. She watched as they talked. Watched the way Beau laughed. The way she smiled. The way she playfully smacked Fjord in the arm. As Beau started to walk away from him, Yasha couldn’t tell if it was the alcohol or divine intervention, but she stood up and made her way over to her.

Beau looked slightly surprised as Yasha stumbled up to her, even though there was no way she was stealthy enough for her not to have noticed. “Hey, Yasha. What’s up?” Beau asked.

Yasha began to fidget with her fingers as she spoke, “So, I’m definitely super drunk right now, but would you like to dance with me.”

Beau smiled up at her, something that never failed to make Yasha’s stomach flutter. “I’d love to.”

Yasha led Beau over to the dance floor, but as Beau noticed she was having a little trouble on her feet, and decided to lead once they got there.

“Soooo,” Beau started, “What do you think Traveler Con will be like?”

“To be honest, I’m kind of nervous. I don’t know much about the Moon Weaver, but I don’t think many gods enjoy dick sacrifices. Not to mention, the moon won’t even be out tomorrow night.”

Beau looked up at the sky. “Yeah definitely not. It’s pretty right now though.”

Yasha looked up with her at the small sliver of Catha. It didn’t cast much light, but it still had enough of a glow to see. Yasha couldn’t help but wonder what Beau’s face would look like in the light of a full moon. She looked back down and instead saw Beau’s face covered in the light of a flickering campfire, her features highlighted and shadowed by the amber glow.

Beau was looking at Yasha as she watched the sky and Yasha blushed when she noticed. There was a stray strand of hair hanging over Beau’s eyes. Yasha brushed it lightly off her face and behind Beau’s ear, leaning in slightly closer to her with the motion. “Your eyes are beautiful in fire light.”

Beau’s face quirked up in a slight smirk. “You should see yours.”

Yasha wasn’t sure which of them started to lean in for a kiss first, but as soon as she noticed what was happening, she pulled away from Beau’s embrace. As much as she wanted to kiss Beau, she wasn’t sure she was ready.

Beau’s eyes shot open as she started to ramble about how sorry she was.

Yasha felt like she was barely in control of her body. “I’m going to go to bed,” she said. Then, she practically sprinted away, making her way towards the beach, the opposite direction of where their hut was.

As soon as she made it to the beach, she plunked herself down and stared up at the moon. It wasn’t a storm, which she would usually watch the sky for, but at least it gave her something to look at as she thought.

In a dream not so long ago, Zuala had told her not to let her be a shackle. And she was trying, oh was she trying. But, letting go was not that easy, as much as Yasha wanted to, as much as she wanted to be with Beau. She knew Zuala wouldn’t be mad at her. She knew Zuala wanted her to move on. But, the pain still hurt just a little too much. She would have to wait for a little while longer, and hope that Beau didn’t move on in the time being.

It took her almost an hour and a half to get up and return to the village to go to bed. She contemplated just sleeping on the beach, but decided it’d probably be better to get a good night's sleep before the events of the day to come. So, Yasha makes the trek back to the village, noticing that the crowd has significantly died down, with only a few people left sitting around the fire talking.

As Yasha sneaks into Vilya’s hut, she notices that all the Nein are asleep, except for Beau, who is sitting up on the far side of the room. Yasha makes her way over to her and slides down the wall next to her. “You waiting for me?” She asks.

“Just wanted to make sure you made it back okay,” Beau says.

Yasha nods. “I’m sorry I ran off like that.”

“It’s okay. I get it.”

Yasha sighs. “It’s not that I don’t want to. I just think I need more time.”

Beau turns to look at her in the dim light coming in through the windows. “Wait, you want to?”

Yasha nods again.

Beau smiles, “Then take all the time you need. I can wait for you. I’ll always wait for you.”

Yasha smiles at her and gives her a light kiss on the hairline. Don’t wait too long. I couldn’t bear the thought. She thought as they tucked in for the night. She couldn’t help it if she laid a little closer to Beau.