Work Text:
Kaveh sputters around his tounge, an ugly feeling constricts his throat rendering him unable to say the harsh words he wants to. His thoughts clash in a war within his head- he can’t seem to decide where to start:
His disappearance..
Or..
His anger.
And, oh, does he have some choice words with whomever put Alhaitham in this… predicament.
It’s not uncommon once or twice a year for the scribe to be whisked away for weeks- this time months- at a time. People widely also considered him a mercenary for his quick and silent abilities.. so when he left, it wasn’t the end of the world .
Not to say he didn’t care. Just that he would never admit it.
But, archons, Kaveh had worried himself to the abyss and back when the 6th month rolled around and- nope. No Alhaitham. He wished he asked more questions- maybe just a “how long?” Or “where?”
Not just a “stay safe” and a goodbye gift. The gift the man was now wearing- trust him to spite kaveh after this.. this betrayal.
“Are you going to stare or-“
“What the fuck.”
Alhaitham flinched, his tone was incredibly harsh, the burning in his eyes bore straight into the back of the infant being cradled on haithams chest. (Lucky bastard) god, the child was so small, obviously no older than a week- had Alhaitham walked here after giving birth? God.
(Perhaps he was presumptuous to assume, but every human had a gut feeling. An immediate feeling of what was the truth. This was alhaitham’s baby )
“Just-“ kaveh scrubbed his face with sweaty palms- “come inside, it’s late. Here,”
The architect steps aside to allow the scribe to enter their home, tugging the babe from his arms, kaveh let Alhaitham stalk down the hall to shower.
Everything was happening too fast. Suddenly he’s home- suddenly the architect is holding his offspring.
Something inside him was screeching to love and care for the new mom, despite him running off to get pregnant by another man. Sighing, he cradles the infant in his arms, they sleep so silently, reminding him of their mother…. God.
Fuck.
Only a few wispy strands of hair cling to their head, in the low light of the night they appeared to have no eyebrows- he just assumed they were grey.. (refusing to think about the possibility of inheriting anything from their father.) they were snug in a torn, bloody blanket- from birth presumably.
It was a pitiful sight. No matter how surreal this felt, he needs to distract himself. Detach. the child has done no wrong, so he adjusts his arms and strides down to his room- he places the babe gently in the center of his bed (he’ll think of Alhaithams extended trust over his newborn later) and softly removes the bloodied blanket-
A baby girl.
A smile graces kaveh’s face, one he will never acknowledge.
And somehow it’s fitting, for the Oh-So-Cold Mr. Scribe to have a delecate baby girl to cherish. Sue him.
It’s love at first sight, and he doesn’t realize he’s crying until she stirrs as his tears slide over her skin. Wiping his face for the second time that night, he cradles her again (god, her) and runs a lukewarm bath and fetches his baby oil and soap (many people do tell him his skin is as soft as a baby’s) to remove the grime from her small body.
And if he runs a soft thumb over her innocent sleeping face with love in his heart… that’s not anyone’s business but his.
————-
He groans. Head in his fucking hands- what was he thinking?! That was not his child! Without asking him either.
Alhaitham just stares as these thoughts overcome Kaveh, and just like the blonde, an emotion rises up in him, talking hold on his throat and not letting go. But it’s not an ugly feeling, no.
He thought the worst while he ran away, then, was when the fear became too much. The pregnancy too scary, and like a cub with his tail tucked between his legs, he fled, carrying kavehs seed with him. He won’t use lame excuses like in drama-
He knows Kaveh would have treated him kindly the whole pregnancy. Never angry or short-tempered. Raised their child together. But that’s just the thing…
Kaveh could put on a face- a mask.
Yes he would be kind, but would it be genuinely? Acts of love- they simply do not equate to love itself.
Kaveh has always fount it easy to act- to do- to say things he didn’t mean. Not to say he didn’t spread genuine kindness, but he has learned to be indistinguishable in his lies and truths.
Alhaitham is not dumb, he knows he could live his whole life being pampered and loved on by kaveh. Living a pipe dream.
A dream. A fake reality.
But he wants authentic love. A true bond.
He so desperately wants it.
And he so meekly ran away from what could have been true all along.
Kavehs sweet voice sang, soft and airy, like the waves of sumeru beach.
Delecate fingers wrapped fine silk around a tiny babe.
And he can only assume Kaveh stayed up the whole night, because as he woke, it was not to the cries of a infant. Instead it was to soft giggling- and playful coos.
Now he stares at an embarrassed Kaveh, mid play-fight with a newborn.
He should be mad.
He doesn’t know that’s his daughter yet.
He doesn’t care.
“We need to talk.”
It was kavehs turn to flinch. But it was true.
He truly thought they were more than fuckbuddies- that they had a sort of relationship forming, based on love and loyalty.
Then Haitham leaves. Only to return with another man’s child.
And he hopes he’s wrong, that it’s not Alhaithams baby. But grey hairs yell to him otherwise… maybe a relatives.
No. He had none.
But this return means someone had left him, left Alhaitham with a baby and ditched him. Vile. Vile and disgusting. But also none of his business.
“Alright. Let’s talk.” Kaveh made no move to get up, sitting on the couch with the baby resting on his thighs.
Alhaitham sighs and sits beside Kaveh.
“Do you remember when we celebrated the new year?”
“..yes.” Vividly. Hottest night of his life- and the last time they fucked before Alhaitham left- both too drunk to remember much… but clear in his mind was the image of pale thighs parted for his pleasure- a full sight of his dripping sex-
Not the time nor place.
“Well, the condom broke.”
…
H-
Huh?…
Kaveh blinked slowly.. math is not his forte but… 9 months gestation… 6 gone.. now a weeks-old-baby.
Gods. No.
“You- i-“
His head whipped hard, looking down at alhaithams daughter-
And then she opened her eyes, cracking them open slowly did she allow early morning light to reflect from her ruby eyes, shining like gems.
“She’s mine” gaping in disbelief did he stare at Alhaitham
“W- why..” tears swelled within his eyes. He gently raised their daughter in his arms, laying her on his chest and releshing the skin contact. Her curled body relaxed upon contact with her father.
Why didn’t you tell me?
Why would you do this alone?
Why did you leave?
What were you thinking??
…
“What’s her name…?” Kaveh had yet to take his eyes off his baby girl, and when he did, the crystalline eyes of his lover met his own.
Kaveh smiled, and suddenly everything was too much… the birth too painful, their separation left him too empty, too lonely. And the dam broke, and the tears wouldn’t stop-
Alhaitham has never cried in front of anyone, it felt too… raw . Even now as fat tears raced down his face, he felt exposed and more naked than ever- even with someone he loved and trusted so deeply.
“I- I wanted to wait..”
Wait until you wanted me as much as I need you.
Wait? Wait for what?
It didn’t matter.
———💐💐💐
The days were quiet, their love now having room to grow between their precious daughter… many things are still unclear, but Alhaitham has learned, even in keeping secrets /for someone’s own good/ there is pain.
And in this knowledge he is blessed every morning with the sight his his bright eyed daughter and her fathers gleaming smile.
His smile becomes something of normalcy, and as time passes, so does the love that envelops his home and heart.
Extra:
💐-“Maba!”
🌱- no, it’s baba.
🏛️- cmon darling! Your sooooo close~
🏛️- say ‘mama’
🌱- ah, so it’s you who’s been teaching her to call me mama.
🏛️- yes, my love. You are her mother are you not? *teasing*
🌱- *Carries their child away*