Archive of Our Own ^beta

This fast food restaurant…

He really liked coming to this place with Doppo once school was over.

Even if his current self doesn't like fast food anymore (he prefers his own cooking better and his cooking skills are really good, if he does say so himself), his past self really found it yummy. Besides, it was nice to have something to look forward to once school was over, because he really hated going back home.

It was nice to be able to spend more time with Doppo. Even if they did nothing special, being with him has always made him feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

It was nice to pretend to be a regular teenager.

How would his past self feel if he knew that he is now Shinjuku's number one host?

Doppo, who is sitting in front of him, is back to his high-school self, but, for some reason, Hifumi is still the same 29-year-old Hifumi.

That's weird, but he looks so adorable in his high school uniform. He always wore it better than him.

Doppo really has changed a lot from his high school self… But even so, there is something so undeniably Doppo-ish about him that never goes away.

"H-Hifumi?!" Doppo exclaims, dropping the hamburger he was about to bite. "No, you can't be… But… Y-you're Hifumi, right?"

To say that Doppo is flabbergasted is an understatement. His eyes are wide open as he keeps stumbling over his words.

Also, it seems that he can decide between staring at him and looking downward. However, no matter what he does, his face only keeps getting redder and redder.

Even if it's understandable, it's a shame that Doppo is surprised by his presence.

"C'mon! Do I really look that different, Doppochin?~" he asks, pointing at his smile.

Realization shows on his face. Only Hifumi would call him Doppochin .

"It's been a while since you used that nickname…" he replies with a light chuckle. "You actually look very different… But… how to say this? You have his aura… There's something about you that just screams Hifumi… Are you perhaps Hifumi, but from the future?"

"I guess that you could say that," he simply replies, still smiling. "I have no idea how I ended up here, but it's nice that you're here, Doppochin!~"

Doppo just hums in agreement, looking at him as if he was dazzled. Now that he knows that he is Hifumi, he hasn't stopped staring at him.

It's almost like he was scrutinizing his whole appearance, especially his face,trying to decipher what makes him Hifumi.

It's making him a little uneasy, if he's being honest.

"Do I… really look that different?"

Sure, he's taller, more muscular, and has a green under-dye, but he doesn't think that he has changed that much.

Or at least that's what he thinks.

He may not be his Hifumi, but every version of Doppo is very dear to him. There's something quite frightful about this Doppo treating him like a stranger.

“Ah… No, that's n-not it! It's j-just…” He stumbles through his words, unsure if he should say what's on his mind. How very Doppo-like . There are some things about his friend that will always stay the same.

“It’s been a while since I’ve seen you… smile like that.” He finally confesses. A nostalgic, yet hopeful smile draws on his face. "I… I missed it."

Oh.

Right, the Hifumi that this Doppo knows must be going through a lot. Barely keeping himself together.

But, despite everything that happened, he's at least able to remember this place fondly.

It's because Doppo was there for him.

His musings are interrupted by a sobbing noise.

Doppo is crying.

"Doppochin?" Hifumi asks, worried. Was it something that he said? His presence? "I'm sorry… Do you want your Hifumi back?"

"Sorry, my bad…" Doppo apologizes quickly as he tries to stop his crying. "No, that's not… I'm just… happy to know that you’ll go back to your cheery self in the future."

Hifumi feels his heart being squeezed. His chest feels heavy, yet extremely light at the same time. He feels guilty for making Doppo feel like this, but it warms his heart to know how much he worries about him.

Doppo grabs a napkin and blows his nose. "This is something that I can't tell him, but I've been really worried about him… What if it never gets better for him? What if I can't do anything to help him? I don't want him to spend the rest of his days being miserable." He stops to take a deep breath. "So… I'm glad that you're here.."

"If I'm able to smile like this again, it's because you were always there for me," Hifumi says softly, taking his hand. "I really owe you a lot, Doppochin. Thank you."

"Idiot… You don't have to thank me. Gosh, you're really Hifumi."

"But I want to. And I'm sure that the me from this time feels the same." He squeezes his hand. "Thank you so much, Doppo."

You're like a superman to me.

This couch and these walls, painted in that color…

This is the first apartment they rented together.

Doppo is sitting by his side, sketching something that he can't quite pinpoint.

That's right! Doppo really likes to draw. Although, it’s been a while since he's seen him do that…

He has the vague feeling that there's something that he needs to tell him…

Even if he remembers how Doppo looked when he was 22, he feels his heart sink a little now that he can see him so clearly.

Doppo doesn't have dark circles under his eyes. He still trims his hair regularly. He doesn't have that gloomy aura surrounding him. Quite the contrary, he carries himself with a certain amount of confidence.

He looks so radiant.

He looks so healthy…

"H-Hifumi?!" Doppo asks, clearly startled by his presence. "W-what happened to you?"

Oh. It seems that, once again, only Doppo went back in time…

"I don't think that I look that different from the me from this time…" Hifumi ponders out loud, placing his thumb and index finger on his chin. "I've let my hair grow longer, though. I like it more this way!"

"From the you from- Wait, does that mean that… you're Hifumi, but like from the future?"

"Yeah… I guess you could say that." It's kinda weird to consider himself somebody for the future, even if it's not technically wrong.

"Long hair really suits you," he says with a fond smile. Upon noticing what he said, he blushes profusely and quickly adds, "N-not like you look bad with short hair! But you look more regal and princely this way… I guess that I will have to work harder to not lose our bet!"

Doppo looks at him with eyes full of determination, which only makes Hifumi's chest feel heavier. Tears started to well up in his eyes.

Is there anything he can do to change Doppo's future? 

His uneasiness doesn't go unnoticed. "Hifumi… Is something wrong?"

"I might be better than the me from this time, but… the Doppochin from the future is very different from you," he confesses slowly, hanging his head. "You've always been there for me, but I… I always wish that I could do something to make things easier for him…"

Will it do any good for this Doppo to know that? It's not like he can't stop him from joining E. L. Medical.

… And it's not like his former job was that good…

"It really seems that the me from the future is having a rough time, huh…"

"... Yeah."

A somewhat awkward silence settles over them. Hifumi didn’t like being the bearer of bad news, but it’s not like he could lie to Doppo…

Why did he end up here?  

"I'm sure that it can’t be that bad if you're happier…" Doppo says slowly, breaking the silence. He says it with a smile so tender that Hifumi feels dazzled by it.

Realizing what he just said, Doppo turns a little nervous and blushes faintly. He quickly adds, "I m-mean… Ah… I guess that I can tell you this now…"

Tell him what?

Doppo lets out a big sigh and looks downwards.

"... There were times where I doubted if things would be better for you. Even if your phobia is something that only you can overcome, I wanted to do something for you. I wanted to make things better for you…” He began. “Then, one day, my mom told me, ‘You just have to trust Hifumi-kun and wait for him to recover. Even if you can’t notice it, I’m sure that all the little things you do for him help him a lot. An ordinary, just okay day is way better than a bad day.’”

Doppo raised his head with a determined look on his face.

"What she said really helped me to make up my mind," he confesses with a coy smile. "No matter how rough things get for you, I'm gonna be there to help you. I will do anything that I can, no matter how small it may be..."

“The things that the future me is going through, are things that only he can overcome. But I'm sure that he's grateful for you being there for him every day. I'm sure that you do more than enough for him…" He looks at him with a determined gaze. "Even if it takes a while, I'm sure that he'll- No, that I'll overcome it."

Then his gaze turned a little somber.

"However… If I ever become a burden to you, then you can just-"

Hifumi doesn't let him finish. "You'll never be a burden, Doppo!"

Doppo looks speechless for a moment, but slowly starts to smile.

"... Thank you," he says softly with a small smile. Suddenly, he lets out a chuckle. “... If you're there, then I think the future me will be fine.”

Doppo's words leave Hifumi speechless. He feels like a weight he didn't know he was carrying has finally been lifted.

An ordinary, just-okay day is better than a bad day.

…

Even if it takes a while, they'll be just fine.

"You should've told me sooner that you don't like cilantro, Doppochin~" Hifumi leans against the couch’s back cushion, with a playful smirk on his face. "And that you love omurice from the bottom of your heart, and not just because it's an easy meal."

"Huh?! H-how do you-" Doppo stops talking as he remembers that he is from the future. "Oh, right…"

He ends up hanging his head in shame.

"I'm an adult now, I shouldn't be picky about food…"

"But I want you to be happy with my cooking, not just content," Hifumi says, a little more firmly this time. Then, he adds with a big smile. "You can be picky with your food with me! You don't need to worry, you already know that I love cooking, and I want to see you smile when you’re eating!"

"H-Huh?!"

Oh, right. That may be too much for the Doppo from this time.

It’s really a mystery how he got so far in life without accidentally revealing his feelings for Doppo.

As much as he would like to tell Doppo how much he loves him, he doesn't want to confess his feelings like this.

Even if he already knows how Doppo feels, he wants his confession to be special.

“I just like seeing you happy, Doppochin,” he ends up replying with a fond smile. "If you're feeling anxious or troubled, you can lean on me. I want you to lean on me. It makes me happy when you rely on me."

"... I don't want you to go out of your way for me. It must be bothersome."

Silly Doppo. 

"When I was feeling down and you brought me breakfast, it meant a lot to me," Hifumi says with a far-off gaze. "I may not bring you junk food, because I enjoy cooking better. And I may not bring you a nice movie to cheer you up, because I'm not into cinema. But… I can comfort you and pamper you in my own way."

"So don't carry everything on your own. I'm here for you. Let me be there for you." He grabs Doppo's hand, squeezing it lightly. "Even if I have my own problems, I will always have time for you, Doppochin."

"Hifumi!"

He hears Doppo calling him from far away, which is weird, because Doppo is right in front of him.

Suddenly, for some reason, it gets harder to make Doppo's face out. And then, he can't even tell where he is anymore.

Still, he clings to Doppo's hand and keeps talking to him.

It’s not because I want to repay all the things you did for me. It’s because you're very important to me, Doppochin.

Doppo's worried face is all that he can see.

"Hifumi!"

"... Doppo?"

His Doppo's worried face.

It seems like he's back to his present.

"Thank goodness you finally woke up." Doppo closes his eyes and heaves a relieved sigh. "I was getting really worried."

Woke up? 

Slowly, Hifumi starts to become more aware of his surroundings. He's lying on the ground and they're in a familiar back alley.

Right… Someone attacked him with an illegal mic.

Even since Chuuoku is in chaos, Shinjuku has become more dangerous… Just like the rest of the divisions. Illegal microphone attacks have become very common in the past few days.

…

Does that mean that he was just dreaming? 

"How do you feel? Can you see clearly?"

"Yeah, just… my head feels a little fuzzy, but that's all."

"Even if it seems like you're fine, we should go to the hospital just to be sure." Despite doing his best to conceal his feelings, Hifumi can tell how worried he is. “Can you stand?”

“Yup! No worries!~” Hifumi stands up fairly quickly, but his vision goes black for a moment. Doppo catches him before he can stumble. Hifumi feels his heart skip a beat.

Ah, really. Even after all of those years, Doppo always makes him fall more in love with him.

“Are you sure? I can call an ambulance if you want…”

“I’ll be fine. I just feel a little woozy,” Hifumi replies with a smile, leaning on Doppo. “Besides, we’re not that far, so let’s just walk.”

Illegal microphones usually come with an equipped ability. They don't adapt to their users.

He has a lot of painful memories that he could have relived, but… he only went back to memories that he remembers fondly.

What did that microphone's creator want to accomplish…?

“Say, Doppochin, what do you want for dinner?~”

“Huh? You shouldn’t worry about dinner right now, dummy. Besides, I can’t think about food in this situation…”

“I guess that I’ll make omurice then.”