Chapter Text
Text
"Let this be a lesson, Moxxie; This is what happens when you cross me."
Moxxie jumped up as if he could physically escape from his dream. He gasped for air pathetically as he felt a tightness in his chest.
"Moxxie?" Millie, his wife got up and turned on the light. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes as she sits up. She can see Moxxie is trembling, and breathing heavily.
Millie moves closer to him, but not too close to avoid overwhelming him, just enough so he could see her. "Moxxie. Mox, You're okay. I'm here, look at me." She speaks gently so he knows he's safe, that she's there for him.
He can't, he can't! He can't do this, his shaking continues as well as his intense breathing, he's dying, bad things are happening, he's gonna die!
"Moxxie, you're safe, okay? You're just here in bed with me. It's just another panic attack, the feelings will go away. I promise, you're okay." Millie reassured.
Moxxie nods, trying to calm down.
"What do you need, baby?" Millie asks.
"Breathe..." Moxxie says. "I can't-"
"It's okay, just take a deep breath through your lungs..." she instructs.
“…can’t.” He says.
“You can…try again. Take a deep breath in…”
He does.
"Hold it for a moment..." she instructed, "now slowly let it out."
He does, and then she helps him repeat that until his breathing gets under control and he’s calmer.
"Are you okay?" Millie asks.
Moxxie looks around the room to make sure he was in fact safe, then he looks at Millie again who smiled sympathetically.
He drops his head in his hands and sighs shamefully. "I'm sorry." He says.
Millie held his chin up to face her. "Was it another nightmare?"
He nods. "Yeah..."
Millie takes his face in both her hands and kisses his forehead softly. He's been having nightmares randomly ever since they visited his father four months ago. "You're okay." She promised. "I won't let anything happen to you."
Moxxie nods. "I know. Thank you, sweetie." He takes her hand and just holds it for a moment.
'Millie is here, I’m okay...'
Millie takes a deep breath. "Mox, maybe you should talk to someone?" she suggests.
Moxxie shakes his head, continuing to fidget with Millie's hand. "No, I'm okay. This happened when I left the fist time, they eventually stopped." He explains.
"How long did it take for them to stop the last time?" She asks.
Moxxie shrugs. "A year?"
"A year?" Millie repeats.
"Well, occasionally I'd get them again, but only on really bad days. They weren't as vivid or often." Moxxie explains. "I'll be fine. It just takes some time."
Millie frowns, taking both his hands in hers. "Honey, I'm worried about you; I've never seen you like this before."
Moxxie sighs. "I know, I was hoping you'd never have to." Moxxie admits. He's worked so hard to be okay, to not think about it, to avoid his past, and make his present much better. He has made so much progress, and now? It all came rolling back in the matter of two days with that man!
All his hard work... for nothing.
Millie studied his face. "Mox, do you want to talk about it? You know you can tell me anything, I'd never judge you or-"
"No!" Moxxie shouts- not really meaning to as he moved away from Millie. "I'm sorry, I mean. I know, but I'm okay. I don't need to talk about it." He says.
Millie wanted to push the issue further, this wasn't normal. "Moxxie..."
"Talking about it will only make things worse, alright?" Moxxie asks. "I can handle this. I promise."
Millie nods. "Okay. If you think that's best, I trust you." She says. Millie takes her husband's face again and kisses him. "I love you so much, I don't want you to feel like you have to fight this on your own...because you don't. I'm here for you."
Moxxie nods. "I know. I love you too." He smiles to try and reassure her, but inside he was just feeling pathetic and guilty over the events of the last few months; Millie is always fighting for him, fighting HIS battles. She shouldn't have to fight this too. It's not fair.
"Goodnight, Moxxie." Millie says, laying back down.
"Goodnight, Millie." He says, doing the same.
She turns off the light and they both try to go back to sleep...
Well, Millie did...
Moxxie looked up at the ceiling, he can't fall asleep, because he can't wake up Millie again.
He checks the time...
2:00 am.
Only five more hours till work.
He'll be fine.
'Just don't think about it.' He told himself.
But he could imagine it so vividly.
The smell of toxic waste that flowed the water they threw live bodies in...
The pleading of their victims, promising they'll pay him back, they just needed more time…
The sadistic smile on his fathers face as Moxxie pushed the cinderblock and the victim into the deep dark water with tears flowing in his own eyes...
That's where Moxxie belonged; Down there, lifeless, for not heeding his fathers warning about crossing him...
His dad knows where he works now, he knows his wife's name now...
But, did Crimson think it was worth his time and effort to find Moxxie?
Moxxie wasn't sure.
He kept a gun handy in his end table just in case...
His worse fear is that it won't be enough.
Nothing he ever did was.