Archive of Our Own ^beta

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‟It should be impossible for you to be any more adorable.” Keisuke said, biting his lip, looking at his boyfriend sitting on the bed.

Kin looked up at Keisuke, opened his mouth, then made a squeaky hitching sound rather than speak; his huge eyes were wide and a little glossy, and his gasping breath sounded painful.

Keisuke frowned and settled beside him, wrapping a steadying arm around his slim shoulders; he supposed hiccups might be more difficult for someone who still wasn't even very used to breathing air.

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‟I suppose you told all your friends I'm crazy and you couldn't stand me!” Junro was getting shrill, Keisuke noted. That was never a good sign . . . not that it was exactly Keisuke’s problem any more to try and keep his temper sweet.

‟All our friends,” Keisuke corrected, ‟know you, Junro. . .” . . .and thus they really did not need me to tell them that you're crazy and high maintenance, he finished silently, because it might not be his problem to keep Junro in a sweet temper, but it would be his problem if Junro got even more shrill and angry.

He fidgeted, wondering with just a little anxiety where Kin-chan was, because he did not need to walk into this. He’d been shy and skittish meeting the couple of Keisuke’s friends he had thus far - he didn’t need to jump to meeting Junro next, much less in this mood.

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‟It's just my friends, again,” Keisuke waved off the noisy chime of his phone - it’d stop in a second anyway, ‟they've been asking me to come hang out with them tonight, but since I've got you here I don't want to, you know?”

‟. . .do you not want to let them meet me? To . . . to admit to me? Or tell them. . .” Kin asked, fingers knotting as he clasped his slender hands tightly together in front of himself, and Keisuke froze, eyes widening; Kin didn't sound angry or even leading - the way Junro most certainly would have - he sounded . . . distressed.

‟Oh fuck! No, I mean- Of course not!” Keisuke assured him, grabbing for the phone an instant before it started to ring again. ‟We can go out with them if it's what you want! You wanna meet them?” he asked, and a little smile bloomed on Kin's pretty face as he looked up at Keisuke. He answered his phone.

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‟Yeah! Run!” Keisuke shouted, laughing; damn, he loved-

‟Eep!” Kin clung to his arm, squishing up so close as to almost hide behind his shoulder; Keisuke frowned, craning his neck to try and get a look at his boyfriend, but all he could see was Kin's long hair and wide . . . very wet . . . eyes.

Keisuke reached for the remote, switching off the movie, feeling bad. ‟Are you all right, baby?” he asked, and Kin sniffled and clung a little tighter, shivers running through him.

‟Why- why were they doing something so horrible?” Kin asked in a tiny voice, lifting his head just enough to turn a confused and distressed look up at Keisuke. He scooped Kin into his lap and resigned himself, as Kin burrowed under his chin, to explaining the idea of horror movies . . . and probably to not watching anything at all scary for a while.

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‟What the fu- Is that Keisuke?” Junro pulled his sunglasses off - it was past dusk anyway - and stared at his ex . . . and the slim, pretty little thing curled into Keisuke's side, looking up at him like he was some kind of wonder. ‟How the hell did he get such a sweet, pretty boy on his arm? Kei is trash!”

‟Uh . . . didn't you date Kei for like . . . more than a year?” Isumi asked slowly, looking at Junro rather than the pair across the street.

‟I said what I said.” Junro said with a huff, crossing his arms and narrowing his eyes at his ex and the inexplicable little-

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‟Oh! Oh it's so pretty! I've never- Are you sure we can go out in it? You don't mind?” Kin asked, his fingers against the slightly frosted glass.

Keisuke grinned, looking more at his adorable boyfriend than the fresh, pristine snow practically glowing in the moonlight outside. ‟Sure, of course we can,” he pulled his coat out of the closet - Keisuke would be fine in just a jacket, but delicate Kin had never been outside in the cold - and went to get Kin into it, ‟but you have to wrap up good, okay? I don't want you to get frozen.”

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‟Have. . . Erm, have you always been able to do . . . this?” Keisuke asked, stroking a hand down Kin's back, involuntarily picturing the little matsuri booth suddenly being full of pretty creatures just like him.

‟No. . .” Kin snuggled in closer on top of him, head tucked on his shoulder, with a crooning little sound of pleasure. ‟Not until you saved me - not until you wished for me. Then I just . . . knew I could be with you.”

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‟It's just so loud.” Kin said apologetically, his voice tiny.

Keisuke smothered a groan as he rolled over, opening his arm and smiling when Kin burrowed into the offered embrace, soft and warm. ‟It's just the wind, baby.”

‟It's so loud,” Kin said again, shaking his head, one hand creeping over Keisuke's chest and up to his shoulder, clinging to him, ‟it's always quiet in the tank.”

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‟I thought you might at least try to apologise!” Junro snapped, loud - and shrill - enough to make the phone crackle, and Keisuke sighed. Of course he had, he had probably expected Keisuke to chase after him and grovel immediately, much less in the days following their split at the matsuri. ‟What else are you going to do? Spend all your time with your new fish?” he spat.

‟Sounds better than spending all my time with you.” Keisuke said almost without thinking, running his fingers through Kin's hair - he was asleep, his adorable face squished against Keisuke's chest - and realised what he'd said only as Junro made a sharp sound like an angry teakettle . . . but really, even if Kin-chan had remained a fish after that first - incredible - night, well. . .

Keisuke grinned, even as his ex continued shrieking in his ear, winding a lock of Kin’s hair around his fingers and stroking Kin's cheek.

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‟Are you sure?” Kin asked, his eyes wide.

‟Sure,” Keisuke wound a lock of Kin's hair around his fingers, shaking his head when Kin almost giggled, catching hold of his wrist and leaning in, almost rubbing his cheek against Keisuke’s hand, ‟we should get you some more clothes to wear.”

Fuck knew putting him in anything of Keisuke’s was. . . Well, it was adorable, but his clothes were huge on Kin, and he could use something other than his kimono that was actually his size, if he was going to be hanging around. Keisuke grinned at the thought, squeezing Kin’s hand.

It didn't occur to Keisuke until Kin practically burrowed under his arm just inside the mall doors that the place might be a bit overwhelming for a boy who had never been outside a pond, a fish tank, or a bottle before.

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‟So,” Junro turned a narrow-eyed, expectant look on Isumi and he froze, wondering what he'd done now, ‟is Keisuke pining for me?”

‟Uhhh. . .” Isumi eyed Eiji, but he only gestured wildly behind Junro's back. ‟He's mostly being weird and spending a ton of time with his new fish, actually.”

Junro looked livid.

‟I mean, Hibiki thought he might just be avoiding us and using it to stay home,” Eiji said weakly, and Junro hummed, frown easing a little, ‟but he really just does seem really, uh, attached to the fish.”

‟I thought you didn't want him back?” Isumi asked, because Junro had gone on several rants about Keisuke, let alone-

‟I don't!” Junro snapped, folding his arms. ‟But he should want me back! He should be trying to get me back! So I can tell him to fuck off, the inconsiderate manwhore!”

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‟I do wish you were more than. . .” Keisuke said softly, trailing his fingertips over the glass.

His mind was full of huge, soft brown eyes - and the soft warmth of the beautiful body curling around his own - but he smiled as his pretty little goldfish burbled at him, scarlet fins waving. Even if Kin-chan was only a goldfish and a dream.

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‟No one ever wanted me,” the pretty boy said, his voice soft, trailing his fingers along the rim of the burbling - now empty - tank, ‟no one ever thought I was pretty, until you . . . I’ve never had a name.”

Keisuke’s throat tightened. ‟I- I call you Kin-chan,” he said before he could think, and the boy turned to him with those pretty, wide eyes shimmering, ‟I mean, it’s just-” he faltered; it wasn’t really a very good name he supposed, not for a person, he had just- He rocked back on his heels, barely keeping his feet as he caught the boy against his chest.

‟I love it!” Kin said in a little sob, clinging to Keisuke, long hair tumbling over his arms. ‟Thank you! Thank you!”

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‟Why?” Kin-chan asked, turning a curious look up at Keisuke and cuddling into his arm - sure, as always, that Keisuke would have the answer.

It was a nice feeling, the admiration and that surety - and very new - but sometimes. . .

‟You know, I have no idea why we started it.” Keisuke said, blinking, and Kin-chan frowned, just a little, furrowed and cute. Keisuke kissed him softly, hugging him tight. ‟Which star would you wish on?” he asked, stroking Kin-chan's long hair out of his face and smoothing it back with a smile as he perked up again, bright eyes darting up to the night sky once more.

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‟I- I never thought anyone would want me!” Kin sobs in his arms, and Keisuke feels a little helpless, but- What else can he do?

‟I. . . I will always want you,” Keisuke says quietly, holding Kin a little tighter, and relaxes just a bit as Kin's tears are joined by giggles, his wet face tucked against Keisuke's throat, ‟my pretty, sweet Kin-chan.” He runs his fingers through Kin's long hair, falling in silken waves around them. ‟How could I not?”

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‟Wha-” Keisuke never wakes up well, and it takes him a few tries to get himself both upright and out of the sheet tangled around his legs, facing the right way, his tongue sorted out. ‟. . .what’re doin’?”

Kin-chan is curled up by the one window in his - their, now, Keisuke thinks, a little dizzily - tiny apartment, wrapped in the blanket from the bed, fingers pressed to the glass as rain pelts off it with a soft patter. ‟It's like being in a tank, but backwards!” Kin-chan says with delight, turning to look at him, eyes sparkling, and Keisuke blinks, slowly wrapping his head around that as Kin-chan watches him, patience mingling with delight in his wide eyes.

‟. . .I suppose so.” Keisuke says eventually, a little amused; he has never considered his apartment to be like a fish tank - though . . . he eyes Kin-chan's empty tank across the room; it is probably more luxurious than the apartment Kin-chan now shares with him outside the tank most times. ‟Does it sound, uh,” Keisuke stumbles out of bed, dragging his curiosity with him and leaving the sheets behind as he wanders over to his tiny, adorable boyfriend, kissing the top of Kin-chan's head and winding his arms around Kin-chan, snuggling into his embrace with a chirruping noise, ‟something like being in the tank?”

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‟Oh!” Kin's eyes were wide, his fingers folded together under his chin. ‟What's all this?” he asked, looking up at Keisuke.

‟We,” Keisuke began happily, then faltered, ‟we’re gonna . . . find your favourite food!” he said hopefully, pushing one of the bowls closer to his boyfriend - he hoped Kin did like red lettuce, because for some reason he had bought a lot of it and he hated it; he hadn't really been thinking clearly while he was in the store.

‟Oh!” Kin said again, and looked back at the plates. ‟There's so much!” he said tentatively, which Keisuke supposed was, uh, pretty fair from someone who up until this week had been eating fish flakes. He picked up a plate of shrimp and suggested Kin start there.

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Keisuke bit the side of his thumb, eyeing Kin fretfully; he was finally sleeping, poor thing . . . Keisuke leaned forwards and smoothed some of his impossibly long, silky hair - now sweaty and tangled - aside.

He’d been miserable and terrified all day, which Keisuke supposed made sense - fish didn't really get the flu, he guessed, but it hadn’t occurred to him to worry about until Kin had been sobbing and feverish and clinging to him.

‟I’m sorry, Kin-chan.” Keisuke said quietly, tucking the blankets a little higher around Kin's slight form and bending to kiss his brow before retrieving the cool, wet cloth from the bowl on the nightstand, sponging his face gently, the way Keisuke’s mother had taken care of him so many times. ‟I’ll look after you, I promise. Just rest. It’ll be okay.”

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‟Are. . . Are you going to try?” Kin-chan asked, his huge eyes shimmering, and Keisuke frowned for a moment before he realised that sad gaze was sliding to . . . the kingyo-sukui booth.

Keisuke hadn’t ever been . . . terribly fond of the game before, but now. . . While he felt a hint of responsibility - what if there were more like Kin-chan? - well, he had his hands full with his pretty kingyou-hime as it was; besides, he couldn’t face those sorrowful eyes.

‟Of course not, sweetheart.” Keisuke said, and Kin-chan smiled, eyes brightening, and darted across the tiny step left between them, throwing his arms around Keisuke and clinging, snuggling into him as he smiled and smoothed Kin-chan’s long hair, holding him happily close.

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‟Ooh, but they’re so pretty!” Kin said happily, and Keisuke grinned; he was pretty, wearing his kimono again and sitting with his legs folded beside him right at the edge of the small pond. He trailed his fingers in the water between the lilies and bright fish came up to nibble at them, making him giggle.

Keisuke wondered if the fish recognised him somehow - kingyou-hime indeed, he thought, and laughed softly, making Keisuke look back at him with a bright smile - or if they were only hopeful for crumbs of bread. Keisuke went to join his boyfriend, and . . . there were some scraps from their picnic in his backpack, perhaps the eager, cute little fish could have both.