Archive of Our Own ^beta

Proverbs 5: 3 - 4
For the lips of a strange woman drop as an honeycomb, And her mouth is smoother than oil:
But her end is bitter as wormwood, Sharp as a two edged sword.

⛪

“You want to fuck my brother, don’t you, Nicholas?”

Nai’s breath was white hot against Nick’s ear. Nick fumbled the five pound bag of altar blend incense, knocking the empty copper censor straight to the floor. He could feel the blood rushing between his ears, drowning out the crash of the metal on the cracked tile. He was probably as red as a beet. He looked up, meeting Nai’s eyes in the old spotted mirror over the table where they were sorting supplies for mass. The antique mottled glass cast a dark pall over everything it reflected, despite the golden glow of the sunset. Maybe that’s why Nai’s smile seemed more sly than teasing.

“What the fuck, man?” Nick shoved Nai’s face away with one hand, reaching down to grab the chain of the censor with the other. Christ, he hoped it wasn’t dented. He couldn’t afford more detentions. Three a week till the end of the school year was enough for him. Even if it did give him the chance to see Vash all the time.

“Why the hell would you say something like that? You crazy or something?” Nick sent a furtive look to the side where Nai sorted clean laundry, making neat evenly folded piles of white fabric. Nai’s mouth was twisted up in the corner and his eyes were downcast.

Fucking liar, looked innocent, but Nicholas knew better. Nai was a snake in the grass, just as twisty as the serpent in the Garden of Eden. Everyone at Saint Julai Academy thought he was such an angel, head altar boy, student council president, piano prodigy, potential valedictorian, yadda yadda.

Nick knew better. You just had to look closely at his eyes under those platinum brows. You could see it right there: crazy. One hundred percent crazy. Antichrist insane.

Nothing like his brother Vash. How they shared the same womb was a mystery that the amateur theologians of Saint Julai Academy might dwell on for centuries if they knew how unhinged Nai really was. Nick knew it was possible — just look at Cain and Abel.

“Not crazy, Nicholas. Just observant.” Nai tipped his head to the side, turning to give Nick a knife cut smile that never reached his eyes. “I know how you watch him. Like a lost little lamb.”

“You’re hallucinating. I don't know what you think you're seeing, but if I'm staring, it's 'cause you two are freaks.” Nick packed the bags of incense back under the table, shaking hands settling the rolls of charcoal briquettes next to them, the tremor betraying his nervousness. What was Nai’s game? It was so hard to predict him, one minute he was charming teachers, the next tripping Nick in the hallways.

Nick stood up, rubbing his sweaty palms against his uniform pants. There was no reason to be nervous, Nai wasn’t anything to be scared of, no matter his brand of unhinged. Better to face this asshole head on. In the end he was nothing more than crazy hidden behind a pretty face. What was there to be afraid of?

Nai had finished putting away the laundry and had moved on to the package they were supposed to be sorting. He handled the box cutter with the precision of a surgeon, cutting the tape carefully, before reaching in to pull out vials of holy water, liturgical missels, and sealed packages of unconsecrated hosts. He sorted the little wafers carefully, stacking piles of them next to each other, like little soldiers ready for holy battle.

“I’m just working with him during detention. You two are the weird ones, goodie two shoes here when you’re not even in trouble. What kind of shit is that?” Nick reached for the pack of cigarettes in his pocket before remembering that Father Roberto had confiscated them this afternoon after catching him smoking behind the gym. He hid the nervous gesture by shoving his fists in his pockets, turning the cheap plastic lighter Father Roberto didn’t take between his fingers. This wasn’t worth digging out the ratty emergency cigarette he had hidden in the lining of his blazer pocket. “Don’t you have enough of that crap being altar boys? Father Roberto’s pets if you ask me.”

Nai let out a noncommittal hum, putting supplies away in the nearby cabinet, and the noise infuriated Nick. Nai was such a fucking prick. Thinking he was better than everyone else, above all the mortals “petty squabbles.”

Not like Vash.

God, it was like a broken record in his head! What the fuck was with him? Why did he keep thinking about Vash like a glitchy video game? Nick clenched his fists, feeling his short nails bite into his palms around the lighter, feeling the cheap plastic creak under his grip.

Sure, Vash was attractive, both of the twins were; well known on campus as dependable, exemplary students and held up as the gold standards of what good Catholic boys should be. Hell, neither of the boys were actually in detention, they just volunteered their time out of the “goodness of their hearts” to help out around the school. And if that meant taking the biggest delinquent Nicholas D. Wolfwood under their wing to help out with school chores, then so be it.

Every Friday Vash would show up in Father Roberto’s English room where detention was held, steady and predictable as the sun, and twice as bright. It made Nick squint. The lenses on his sunglasses never felt dark enough against that smile. They’d sweep classrooms and wash black boards together, clapping chalk dusted erasers out on the blistering asphalt, clapping each other with a chalky eraser on occasion when things got too boring.

That was what Nick liked about Vash, he was good, but he was real. No one felt more alive than Vash when he was laughing loudly at a joke or checking Nick with his shoulder while they put PE equipment away.

Nai reached over to place a small stack of hosts near the round metal patten. These would have to be put away before they left in the locked safe located behind the picture of John the Baptist washing Jesus’ feet. Nick felt the heat of Nai’s forearm brush his, and it made the fine hair on the back of his hands stand up straight.

Well, maybe Nai felt real too. If Vash was the real of a cold glass of lemonade on a blisteringly hot day, Nai was the real of a dark bedroom after a really scary movie. A twisting in your gut, the sweat on the back of your neck and the way the darkness writhed right after you turned the light off. Nai was the monster under the bed that you told yourself wasn’t there. But Nick wasn’t fucking afraid of him.

“You always wear those sunglasses. Do you wear them because you think they help you hide?” Nai’s voice had a childish sing-song lilt to it. He finally turned his face to Nick, and in the orange light of the afternoon lit sacristy, Nai was pretty. So pretty, Nick bit off a gasp. The warm light made him look so much like Vash, lit from within, like sunshine. “You know, it's not your eyes that betray you, it's that slutty mouth. You’re always chewing your lips like you want to eat Vash up.” Nai’s grin was a gaping wound, all teeth and a red flash of tongue over flushed lips as he flicked his eyes down to Nick’s mouth.

Nick yanked his hands out of his pockets and covered his mouth, licking the freshly bitten flesh of his lips, tasting the bitter tang of blood. Fucker. Fucking prick asshole fucker. Saw too much. Talked too much. Flapped his gums just to hear himself talk.

“Oh, did I hit a nerve?” Nai grinned and stepped close, crowding him back. The sharp edge of the table dug into Nick’s back. Even though he had said he wasn’t afraid of Nai and Nai’s brand of crazy, here he was backed into a corner, just like Daniel in the lion’s den. “You jonesing for a cigarette, Nicky?”

Nai’s arms bracketed Nick’s sides. They were too close. Trapped. Nick could see the light dusting of freckles across Nai’s nose and cheeks, surprisingly winsome and a stark contrast to the predatory look in his eyes. They looked almost the same as his brothers, a flaw in the perfection of their faces. Nai’s eyelashes were lighter than Vash’s though. How Nick knew that, he didn’t want to think too hard about.

“Don’t call me Nicky!” Nick’s voice came out thick; huskier than he meant it to. The nickname crawled down his spine like a cold drop of sweat, making him shiver.

“Suit yourself.” Nai shrugged, inching closer. “You know, Vash is dating Meryl from Saint Normans. He doesn’t swing that way. Your little crush is destined to be unrequited.” Nai’s fingers squirmed up Nick’s sides, worming their way into the belt loops of Nick’s pants. “My brother barely knows you exist. He only knows your name because he’s such a nice guy. Don't you think if he wanted to be friends he would have hung out with you just once outside of detention?"

Nai pressed close, those sharp little fingers slipping up under the curved hem of his uniform shirt, icy despite the warmth of late spring.

“Shut up.” Nick bit the words out from behind his teeth. Yet he couldn’t find it in himself to push Nai’s hands away. He was mesmerized by Nai’s eyes, frigid pools of blue, so different from the tropical seas of Vash’s eyes. And those cold fingers roused a heat within him that he didn’t really want to examine too closely.

“You know what he’s doing today instead of helping you out at detention? He’s walking Meryl home after journalism club, carrying her books like a good little boyfriend.” Sensing Nick’s weakness, Nai slid his whole hand up under Nick’s shirt, pressing the cold palm against the sweaty heat of Nick’s stomach. “I bet her mom isn’t home. For such a little thing, Meryl sure is forward. Do you want to know how far they’ve gone?”

“Shut up, shut up, shut up.” Nick squeezed his eyes closed and turned his head away from Nai.

But while it cut off the brutality of Vash’s beautiful twin, it heightened other things. The amber and sandalwood smell of Nai’s body pressed closed up against his chest. The few times Vash and Nick had gotten physically close were burned into Nick’s memory, the scent of his laundry soap and mint deodorant something Nick chased with an ever increasing frequency. Even so, he could feel that memory being branded over with Nai’s scent. Vash’s sweetness was like jasmine bushes on a summer day, soon overpowered by Father Roberto swing his heavy censer of incense on Palm Sunday; sweetness trampled by the cloying stench of frankincense and myrr, until it burned down his throat.

The feeling was guilty, something he should hate, but instead it sent a prickle of heat between his legs, burrowing deep into his loins, while he put up no resistance to Nai’s wandering hands.

“I know they’ve kissed.” Nai’s breath leaves goosebumps on Nick’s ear. His lips are so close that he can feel the wet press of Nai’s lower lip on his earlobe. “I’ve seen the hickies Meryl leaves on him. She’s so short, they’re all hidden by his uniform.” Nai’s hands toy with the hair on his stomach, tracing patterns on the thin skin, each swipe feeling like it's a marionette string right to his dick.

He is so fucked. This is such a fucked up situation. Nai’s mouth left a burning trail from his neck across his cheek. Nick couldn’t pull away far enough, trapped by the table like he was. He could feel Nai’s hot breath inching closer and closer to his mouth.

“What? Don’t you want to kiss me?” The undercurrent of laughter cut as deeply as the fingernails that dug into his stomach.

“Fuck off, you pervert.”

“Oh, I see, you want your first kiss to be with Vash.” Nai licked a wet stripe up the space behind Nick’s ear, making him shudder. “How cute.” Nai bit down harshly, and what should have made Nick hurl with pain and shame made his dick throb in his boxers. This was so fucking bad.

Here he was, getting fucking tortured by his crush’s evil twin brother in the sacristy with a boner that was hard enough to act like a lightning rod begging to get struck down by God.

“Don’t you wonder how that works? She’s so little, how is she not torn in half by his dick?” Nick only realized how Nai would know the size of Vash’s dick when he felt Nai’s enormous boner pressing against his thigh. Guess some things ran in the family huh?

Fuck, what would it feel like to feel small next to these guys?

“Maybe he fingers her a lot? Spits on her pussy to get her wet enough?” Nai laughs darkly kissing the spot he just bit, raking his fingers through Nick’s stomach hair.

Nai’s words sent shivers through him. The “what if’s” echoed in his mind. Nick squeezed his eyes closed tighter, aware of the pinch of his too small loafers and the squeeze of straining buttons on his poplin uniform shirt. Nick hadn’t been small for years. Gangly with growth, achy bones and tired eyes. What would it be like to be small and safe in Vash’s arms? Enveloped in that peppermint and summer scent, engulfed in white sheets and writhing under him, full of his cock and his tongue and–

Nai’s hand slid down to cup his hard dick in his pants. God! Nick could feel his brain stutter. Did it matter who was pressing wet kisses to his neck? Nai or Vash, he was going to hell either way. Couldn’t he just pretend for a bit?

“That's how Vash is with someone he likes, you know. Always eager to please. But he just can't help coming by to help you, instead of spending time with his girlfriend. You know how he is with his charity cases.” Nai’s nose was as cold as his tone against Nick’s cheek. The words against his face felt like the most sinful caress. “But we know better, right Nicholas? You want to be more than just a charity case for Vash don’t you?”

Charity case. Yeah, Father Roberto had the entire school thinking Nick was a delinquent, and not just a tired student with a secret cigarette addiction living with his tired poor old abuelita. Why would Vash think any differently than anyone else? How could Nai tell there was more underneath the surliness and the sunglasses?

Nai pressed a wet kiss to the side of Nick’s mouth, yanking harshly on the clasp of his pants, shoving his hand inside to get a handful of Nick’s hard on. He gasped, overwhelmed by the feel of Nai’s long, cold fingers playing with the soaking tip of his cock. It felt nothing like his own hand. He felt like he could spill at any second, the combination of pleasure and shame making him ride the knife edge of orgasm.

“You know you can’t have Vash, but you can have me.” Nick’s eyes shot open to look at Nai, cuddled up close against his shoulder, one hand playing with Nick’s cock, the other slowly flicking Nick’s shirt buttons open. “Have you ever had your dick sucked before, Nicholas?” Nai asked it so plainly, curious, like a teacher in biology class, but his hands were bold, shoving Nick’s pants down and dropping to his knees before finishing the question.

The administration at Saint Julai would have the student body think that Nick was the hardest of delinquents, but Nick had never been kissed let alone had his dick touched by someone's elses hand. He squeezed the edge of the table behind him hard, the sharp edge biting into his palms.

When Nai laid a wet kiss against the leaking tip of Nick’s cock, he couldn't help but wish it was Vash on his knees in front of him. That it was Vash looking up at him with pretty blue eyes. That it was Vash licking up the side of his cock before swallowing it down whole in one smooth motion.

“Ah! Fu–“ Nick reached up to grasp Nai’s head in his hands, only to be stopped by Nai grabbing his wrists and pinning them forcefully back against the table. It was a stern reminder: this wasn’t Vash, this was Nai. Nai’s throat working around the head of Nick’s cock. Nai’s lips swollen and red as they tried to contain the mess of spit and precome that leaked from the side of his mouth. Nai’s frigid hands trapping Nick’s in a painful grip up against the table hard enough to bruise. Nai giving Nick pleasure and pain in equal degrees, the edge of his teeth grazing his cock, soothing the burn with the hot glide of his tongue.

Nick panted heavily, trying to keep his eyes closed and the noises inside, but the intimate sounds of Nai’s throat swallowing around his cock, and the warm light of the sacristy’s stained glass windows made Nick forget to care about being quiet. His needy groan sounded out like a shot, the hot prickle of tears pressing against his lashes. Nai on his knees made such a pretty picture. If Nick squinted he could imagine it was Vash. Vash who looked up at him with mischief in his eyes, Vash with tears running down his cheeks because he was so hungry for Nick he might choke. Vash, Vash, Vash.

“V-Va-shhit– I’m gonna– ah!”

With an intimate squelch, Nai pulled off Nick's cock, the death grip on his hands replaced with a tight ring of Nai’s fingers around the base of his cock. The erupting pleasure that curled like the fires of hell at the base of his spine cut off abruptly.

“What the fuck man?! Why’d you stop? I was going to cum!” Any semblance of nonchalance Nick had about the situation evaporated in an instant, as the tears poured down his cheeks from under his sunglasses. It was ridiculous what a hot mouth, blonde hair and blue eyes would do to a man when he was that close to orgasm. He didn’t have any pride where the twins were concerned, especially not when Nai looked like that. Pink cheeked, swollen lips and a sneer, precum and spit smeared across his mouth from Nick’s cock.

“It's bad manners to call someone else's name in bed. Besides, you were having all the fun. It’s my turn now.” Nai punctuated the statement by squeezing the hell out of Nick’s cock, pushing the edge of orgasm farther out of reach. Nick could feel it, the orgasm and shame, hovering behind his eyeballs, waiting to rise up again with Nai’s devious tongue. The longer Nai stared, the more it twisted deep in his stomach, how he couldn’t seem to tear these two brothers apart in his head. How shameful it was for him to substitute one for the other.

Nai licked his lips and yanked Nick’s pants down around his scuffed loafers. He stood swift and much more gracefully than any boy should after getting down on a dusty sacristy floor to swallow down a delinquent’s cock. And Nick was so woozy from the edging that he didn’t have any time to protest when Nai turned him around against the ratty table.

Nick should have complained, but seeing his own pleasure-canted eyebrows in the tarnished mirror in front of him felt like a dream. It was some other Nick, the actual depraved delinquent who liked getting fucked by the “good” twin. Another Nick who liked feeling the bite of Nai’s fingers in his hips so hard they left marks. Some other Nick who moaned at the hot brand of Nai’s cock against the cleft of his ass.

“I’m going to ruin you, Nicholas. I’m going to fuck your little hole so hard it’s loose and sloppy. I’m going to take this virginity. You’ll be used goods. Vash will never want you then.” Nai grasped the vial of sacramental oil off the table, and Nick gasped at the slick, cool feeling of it being smeared against his hole.

Maybe the Nai in the mirror was a different Nai, too. He didn’t look sly or seductive anymore, he looked feral and mean. Far from what anyone at school would say was a perfect boy. It made Nick think, what would mirror Vash look like? Would that Vash take and take and take the same way Nick’s Vash, gave and gave and gave?

The fragrant grassy aroma of the sacramental oil brought Nick to the Nai in front of him, the slick residue rolling down his thighs while Nai fumbled for his own pants.

“Someone seems desperate,” Nick slurred out, the combination of his aborted orgasm and the scents and sounds of Nai’s arousal made him feel drunk and brave.

“I’ll show you desperation, Nicholas.” Nai’s hand was rough as it grabbed Nick’s face, bracing him for the rough slide of Nai’s cock into his virgin hole.

This was not the kind of fucking they talked about in the BL comics he covertly read in the back of the bookstore. It wasn’t kind. It wasn’t soft or gentle at all. Nai’s cock felt like it was ripping him apart, tearing the selfish and needy feelings he had inside to the surface. Nick panted, grunted, and watched Nai’s sneering face in the mirror, like it was happening to someone else. Face smeared with holy oil, anointed as though for this purpose alone, to be a hole for the twins to fuck into. Vash to fuck into the rotten needy hole of his heart, and Nai to fuck into the greedy hole of his ass.

Nai fucked like a man possessed, shedding all trappings of human form. A demon, taking over; embracing all the pleasures and wickedness of hell. Nai’s heavy brows seemed darker in the mirror, his mouth a slash of teeth and tongue and the shadows seemed to give him sharp wings spread out behind him. Who was this boy in the mirror?

He shoved Nick face down on the rough table, the box they unpacked tipped over and scattered the loose unconsecrated hosts across its surface. Nai grunted with each thrust of his hips, wrenching a pained whine from Nick. The angle freed Nick’s cock from the pinch of the table and had Nai’s thrusts hitting something inside of him that made his eyes roll back in his head and stomach pulse every time Nai’s cock hit it. Every thought in Nick’s head leaked from his ears with the thrusts.

The table thumped against the wall, rattling the mirror, and Nick’s sunglasses slid down his nose. Nai gripped his hips, lifting him up on his toes and Nick rode the knife edge of pain and pleasure. Nai’s cock hit that spot over and over, making Nick’s hand scrabble out for purchase on the edge of the table. The unconsecrated hosts scattered by the table’s shaking, are casualties to Nick’s sweaty clenching hands.

“I’ll fuck this crush right out of you.” Nai growled in his ear, jostling a rough moan out of Nick. One of his oil slicked hands reached beneath him and Nick rose up on his toes at the dual pleasure of getting fucked and jerked off at the same time. “I’ll show you who is the worthier twin. It’s me, it’s me, I’m the one who should be adored.”

Nai’s hand gripped Nick’s dick painfully, but Nick’s cum drunk brain couldn’t get it together, mixing up the signals and he’s pinned like a bug on a card for Nai’s use. The orgasm is ripped from him; one minute he’s trying to decide if he wants to fight to get away or if he wants to push back to get more, and the next he’s cumming so hard he swears his soul leaves his body.

He’s twitching and overstimulated at the sharp slap and thrust of Nai’s cock against his abused prostate and the tears that gathered in the back of his throat have begun pouring down his cheeks. He’s hot, burningly hot. Is this what the fires of hell felt like? A thick cock carving a channel through his insides, a demon branding him with fingers that bruise like fire?

Aren’t all demons just fallen angels anyway? Nai sounded like one, snarling and grunting, muttering under his breath He looked like one too, strong throat flushed and veins popping out around his temples.The golden halo of the evening had disappeared with the setting sun casting the sacristy into dimness, and Nick lost the threads of Vash in Nai’s desperate and painful thrusts inside him. All he could fee was Nai, Nai all over.

“You Vash fuckers are all the same, the second I come on to you you’re happy to sully your little vision of Vash to get a piece of him through me. It's okay Nicholas, you're not the first, nor will you be the last.” Nai growled, nails digging half moons into Nick’s hips.

He isn't the first? Of course he isn't. How could Vash look upon him like an equal, someone he could love and care for? He was just an abomination before these two angels.

Lost him? Nick never had him. Nai was right all along.

Laying his cheek on the table, Nick sobbed.

With a guttural moan, Nai came inside him, and Nick couldn’t find it in himself to care. He could feel his own cum cooling on his thighs, and the burn of the splintered wood of the table on his cheek barely registered. His sunglasses were all fogged up on the tip of his nose and all he could feel was the heat of Nai’s cum warming his insides, too close, taking up space where his crush on Vash used to be.

The sudden quiet in the room felt strange, Nai’s heaving breath taking up too much space where his frantic thrusting used to be. Nai’s rough grip turned soft, one hand sliding up Nick’s back to cup his jaw. His weight was a brand on Nick’s conscience, the kiss Nai forced on his mouth was one on his soul. Each flick of Nai’s tongue against Nick’s protestless lips lapped away the remainder of who Nick used to be.

Nai stood and withdrew with a wet squelch, and the heat trickled out of Nick leaving him cold again. Clothing rustled behind him, and Nai huffed a laugh. “You look good like this, Nicholas. A perfect little receptacle for my seed. Let’s do it again sometime.” Nai patted Nick’s ass. Nick peeked up at the mirror, watching Nai put the tender good boy mask back on while tightening his uniform tie.

“Don’t forget to clean up when you leave. We wouldn’t want Father Roberto finding out what you were up to in here would we? You might be branded a slut as well as a delinquent.” Nai’s heels clicked on the cracked tile as he left, and Nick felt his legs trembling. He refused to give into the weakness of collapse until he heard the squeaky door shut.

Nick slumped to the floor, ignoring the hard tile on his knees, and how his pants tangled around his ankles. The cold floor felt good against his abused ass, and Nai’s cum leaked out to puddle where he sat.

How did it end up like this? What did he, Nicholas D. Wolfwood, do to deserve this?

Nick fumbled in his blazer pocket for the ripped edge of the lining, and fished out his emergency cigarette. A bent, tattered, half-smoked thing, but it would have to do. He lit it and took a deep inhale, feeling the nicotine hit his brain, giving everything a hazy cast to it.

Maybe in the end it wasn’t worth it to try and be good. He’d never be good enough for Vash anyway. Maybe he really was just as bad as everyone at Saint Juli thought. He liked it didn't he? Imagining Nai was Vash. The hot press of Nai's dick inside of him? The room filled with smoke, and Nick knows, no matter what he does, he'll be blamed for this mess anyway.

Might as well embrace it. Maybe he can take Nai down with him and have a little bit of fun at the same time. 

“Fuck it all anyway.”