Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

‘Oh, Nova… I wish it never had to be this way, but it is the only way to keep you safe. To keep you safe from them...from me.’

‘Haze, you don’t have to do that; not when you had absolutely nothing to do with it.’ … ‘I don’t care. If you go down, I go down with you; it’s what friends do. It’s already decided, and there’s no way you’re gonna change my mind.’

‘I can’t have them take all this stuff away. All this...this is the only thing I have of my bio-parents; the only thing I have of finding them, of knowing who and what I am. I need to know what I am, or I’m...I’m nothing.’

‘Nova will be fine, with or without me. She has you. You said you wanted to train her; this is the perfect opportunity. While I’m away, you can spend time with her, get to know her...be a father to her. She needs you.’

‘I don’t understand! Why do they do this to us? Why are they so desperate to kill you when you’ve done absolutely nothing to them? Why can’t they just leave us alone? Let us live? Let us be normal?’

‘I’m sorry, Nova. I understand the guilt and anger you're feeling but killing that pirate won’t bring your father back.’ … ‘I don’t care! She deserves it! All of them! The Silence included! They did this to him! To us! They should all be destroyed!’

‘You wish for us to give you a chance to prove yourself, but you refuse to give yourself a chance. You refuse to remove your own veil. You refuse to be accepted as you are.’

‘We don’t own the universe; we explore what has yet to be discovered! We save what has once been lost! We heal what has once been damaged! We correct what has once been wronged! Those are the true meanings and responsibilities of being a Time Lord!’

‘I told you. The Time Lord plague must be purged, and you and your mother were always the ones to do it. You two were born to kill the Doctor, and now you will finally fulfill that destiny. Welcome to the family, Nova Susan Song: The New Woman to Kill the Doctor. Become one of us!’

‘I know I’ve said this a million times, and I will keep saying it until my last breath. You are seared onto our hearts always, Nova Susan Song, and nothing will ever change that. Not one thing.’

The sound of my alarm wakes me up with a jolt, rudely interrupting me from my deep slumber. Sighing heavily, I reach over to slam the “snooze” button on my alarm clock before laying back down on my bed, running my fingers through my tangled hair, and feeling highly tempted to go back to sleep, back into the dream I just had—a dream filled with mystery, suspense, wonder, and adventure.

“Wow!” I exclaim to myself. “That was a crazy dream! A time/space-travelling blue box that’s bigger on the inside… My father was a bow tie-wearing alien from another world… A sinister cult was constantly hunting me because they wanted to train me as an assassin against my father… Man, I really need to stop eating too much ice cream before bed. It’s become a seriously bad habit.” I glance back at my alarm clock, which reads 9:00am. After turning off the alarm fully, I get out of bed, shower, and get dressed for the day into jeans, a T-shirt, running shoes, and my favorite rose-printed denim jacket.

As I am getting ready, I think back on my dream and how unbelievably real it felt. If I didn’t know better, I’d say that dream was real, and this world I’m living in now is fake, but that’s impossible. I mean, who ever heard of a human being with two hearts instead of one, or for something—literally any container—that which its interior is significantly larger than its exterior? Absolutely none of that is possible unless it was from another planet, but even that seems impossible. I mean, sure, I’ve heard the stories of the alien invasions happening all over the world, and some even my family and I were a part of (such as that Christmas in 2005 when my father was enveloped by a strange ‘light’ and that ‘light’ forced him to walk to the nearest tallest building and stand on its roof in seeming preparation to jump to his death), but I never believed in any of that stuff, even despite being a part of them myself. Every time I read or heard about these so-called ‘invasions,’ I always took it with a pinch of salt, thinking these events to be nothing but elaborate hoaxes just so people could be noticed on camera, and I still do. Things like this should only ever exist in Sci-Fi movies and nothing more.

After I finish getting dressed, I catch a glimpse of my reflection in my bathroom mirror. I pause, frowning at my reflection, finding it strange for some unknown reason to see my face to be much different from the face (faces, as I apparently had the ability to change parts of it at will) I wore in my dream. The instant I set eyes on my reflection, I expected to see the face from my dream—the face with my dream-father’s prominent chin and ancient green eyes and my dream-mother’s bushy halo of dark-red curls—but I see my own instead, with a perfectly rounded chin, frizzy hair like Hermione Granger from the Harry Potter films, and chocolate-brown eyes. I even place my hand over my chest, and, also for some odd reason, I am surprised to feel only one heart beating calmly.

“Huh…” I frown at the discovery. “That’s weird… In my dream, I had two hearts, but in real life I only have one. Why do I get the sense that I should have two hearts instead of one?” I then shake my head at the ridiculous notion. “Nah, I can’t have two hearts; that’s impossible. Humans only have one heart, and that’s all they should have. I’m just being silly; my brain is not fully awake yet.” I then turn off my light and go downstairs to meet my parents.

No surprise, I find both of my parents downstairs, my father sitting in the living room watching TV and my mother cooking a typical English breakfast (despite us being an American family) in the kitchen.

“Hey, Mom,” I greet her as I enter the kitchen and sit at the table in front of a massive plate of Poached Eggs and Toast.

“Hey, sweetie,” she says with a smile. “Perfect timing. I was just going to yell up that breakfast was ready. Made your favorite: Poached Eggs on an English muffin and a bowl of fruit on the side.”

“Thanks,” I smile back as I look over the plate contently, and I frown when I notice some chopped pears mixed with my other favorite fruits, making me remember hating pears in the dream, which is also true in real life. I immediately point this out, saying, “Um, there are pears in here. You know I don’t like pears, right?”

“Really?” Mom frowns back, evidently confused. “When you were a kid, you used to love them. Why so picky all of a sudden?”

“Nothing,” I shrug. “I just…thought you knew I didn’t like pears. Never have.” I then frown, feeling immensely confused as to the fact that in this world I actually like pears, even though I’m fairly certain I never liked them, growing up.

Mom sighs. “Well, you never complained about pears before. Pick them out if you must. They used to be your favorite fruit. Bananas too.”

“Oh, I’ll eat a banana any day!” I say as I begin legitimately picking out the pears and setting them on my plate away from the rest of the food. “They’re better than pears.”

Suddenly, without warning, my mobile phone rings in my pocket. I take it out, and I see that my best friend, Hazel McAdams, is calling me. I immediately answer the call, saying with a mouthful of egg, “Hey, Haze! What’s up?”

“Hey, Syd,” she replies. “I’m good. Just calling to let you know that I’m about to head your way. I should be there in about five minutes.”

I frown. Wait…she’s coming over? When did we arrange that?

For some reason, I suddenly find it exceedingly difficult to remember the last time I truly saw Hazel, which, I’m fairly certain, was at college.

I frown again. No, that’s wrong! We couldn’t have been at college, especially since we’re technically still in high school; we literally just finished our Sophomore Year last week.

Why do I seem to remember just finishing Sophomore Year of high school and finishing my first semester of college with her at the same time? This doesn’t make any sense!

“Hello?” Hazel asks through the phone. “Syd, you still there? I said I’m on my way to your house and will be there in five minutes. Four at this point.”

“Sorry, I got distracted,” I half-lie, shaking my head, before asking, “You’re coming to pick me up? Why?”

“For Laser-Tag! Remember?” she says in an obvious tone. “How could you have forgotten? We talked about it, like, last night!”

Why don’t I remember that? I ponder to myself. Though, at the same time, I do remember doing the exact same thing with Hazel in my dream, only for something downright terrifying to happen during the outing. I say instead, chuckling like I’ve just told a joke, “Oh, right! Yeah, of course I remember. I just…lost track of time. I had the strangest dream last night. I’ll tell you about it when you get here.”

“Okay,” she says in a tone like she seems to doubt my words. “Well, see ya shortly!”

“See ya!” I say before hanging up.

“You had a strange dream last night?” Mom says as I finish my breakfast. “Tell me. I’m curious.”

I shake my head. “Nah, it’s so bizarre that you wouldn’t understand.”

“Try me,” she shrugs in reply.

I sigh, deciding to tell her anyway. “Alright. I dreamt that I was the daughter of a powerful alien time-traveler who always wore a bow tie and owned a blue police box that was bigger on the inside; you know, the ones that were used in Europe in the fifties; not that they were actually bigger on the inside. Anyway, on our travels through Time and Space, there was a sinister organization that was always after us, and they wanted to kidnap me to train me as an assassin against my father—the alien with the bow tie. Of course, I always refused, but when I ran away from my guardians—who were actually you guys—the members of the organization kidnapped them and used them as bait to get to me. We—my father and I—never fell for their tricks, and my mother, who was a time-travelling archaeologist and once killed my father but later fell in love with him, found my guardians at one of their bases, and we broke in and rescued them. A lot of bad things happened, but we barely survived, and I continued my travels with my father after.”

“Wow!” Mom says in amazement. “You have quite the imagination, honey. You should write a novel.”

I chuckle at this. “Yeah, I guess I could. Anyway, I should finish getting ready. Haze will be here any minute.”

I snarf the rest of my breakfast just in time when the doorbell rings. I immediately go to answer the door, greeting my best friend. “Hey, Haze!”

“Hey, Syd!” she smiles. “You ready?”

“Almost,” I nod. “Let me get my shoes and wallet.” After letting her in, I rush back upstairs to get my things and return to see her talking casually with my parents.

“You girls have fun!” Mom calls to us as we walk to Hazel’s car parked on our driveway.

“And stay out of trouble!” Dad adds from the living room.

“We will!” I call back to them. “See you tomorrow!” I then say after I get in Hazel’s passenger seat and click in my seatbelt, “Oh, Haze, you will not believe what I dreamt about last night! It was the most insane dream I think I’ve ever had in my entire life!”

“Okay, what was it about?” she asks curiously as she drives us out of the neighborhood.

I spend the entire car ride telling her everything about my dream, from my—Nova’s—adopted life at home growing up with Hazel to traveling through Space and Time with my Time Lord father, the Doctor, and half-Time Lord mother and former assassin to the Doctor, River Song/Melody Pond. I even tell her about my advanced Time Lord ‘Deviancy,’ which made me much more powerful than both of my parents combined, which was why the Silence/Vokanari were so adamant about kidnapping me and training me to use my advanced powers to kill them, exactly like River was trained before I was born.

“Wow, Syd,” Hazel says once I finish my story and after we arrive at our local arcade, “that’s quite the story. That would be a good novel to read.”

“Ha!” I chuckle. “Mom said the same thing!”

“So, you think any of that could be real?” she asks curiously as we approach the arcade after she locks the car. “I mean, with there being so many alien invasions all over the world, like all those planets in the sky, and the replica of The Titanic nearly crashing into Buckingham Palace… And there was footage of that one Christmas where apparently everyone transformed into a creepy blond dude…including us! God, that must’ve been insane! Not that I remember any of that, and I’m glad I don’t.”

“I know, right?” I chuckle back before steering back to Hazel’s question. “I don’t know. Normally I’m pretty skeptical when it comes to stuff like that. From all that stuff, the time-traveler in my dream could be real. If he is real, I’m not sure if he has a daughter, but if he does, it’s not me. I look nothing like him, but I did in my dream. I shared his chin and eyes, and toward the end of the dream my hair ended up looking much like my mother’s—all bushy and curly. In real life, I look like my parents, or my guardians in my dream.”

“Didn’t you say you came here with me in your dream,” Hazel frowns, “and we were attacked by something? A Sultan, you said?”

I nod. “Yeah. It was actually a Sontaran—an ugly ‘dwarf’ thing with a bulbous head like a baked potato. Kept getting ‘boy’ and ‘girl’ wrong; at least, that was what the one that allied with my father kept getting wrong.”

“Girl, you really need to get out more,” she chuckles at me like I’ve truly gone mad and should be sent to an insane asylum A.S.A.P. “Do you even hear yourself?”

I roll my eyes. “Yeah, I sound like an idiot, I know!” I then sigh, thinking about explaining the strange thoughts in my head, “You’re going to think I’m even more crazy when I say I can’t help but think tha—”

I am suddenly interrupted when a random man walks out of the arcade at the same time as we are entering, and the instant he sets his eyes on me, he immediately begins screaming bloody murder at me.

“Wake up!” he shouts like a crazed lunatic loud enough for the entire street to hear.

“What the hell?!” Hazel exclaims in fear at the man.

“Whoa, hey!” I say calmly, despite my single heart pounding a million beats per minute, lifting my hands up defensively. “Calm down there, buddy. Are you alright? Do you need help?”

“Wake up!” the man continues to yell at me, his psychotic demeaner seemingly heightening. “You must wake up! WAKE UP!” At this point, he practically spits in my face.

“Whoa, okay; take it easy!” I say, frowning in confusion, not sure whether I should run or not. “Look, um…I’m sorry, I don’t know wha—”

Apparently Hazel has already decided on running as she immediately grabs my arm, saying, “Syd! Let’s get out of here!” as she frantically pulls me inside the safety of the arcade, away from the man.

Thankfully the man doesn’t follow us. Instead, he watches us rush away from him, all the while continuing to shout “wake up!” like a madman. He also seems to be yelling the words like it’s insanely important, like our lives depend on it, which is incredibly weird. Once the entry doors slide closed, the arcade is quiet, save for the few onlookers who glance and murmur at each other, wondering what the hell happened and whether or not someone should call legitimate help for the man.

“What the hell was all that about?” Hazel pants, seemingly out of breath, as we cower behind a pinball machine.

“I have absolutely no idea,” I sigh, attempting to slow down my own heart.

“You think he was high on something?” she asks curiously. “I mean, that guy was a freakin’ psycho! I thought for sure he was gonna mug us, or something!”

I shake my head. “I don’t think so. I mean, he may have been high on something, but I don’t think he was a threat.”

“What do you mean, he wasn’t a threat?!” Hazel exclaims incredulously. “Of course he was! Did you see his eyes? They were crazy! Those looked like the eyes of a serial killer to me! And what the hell did he mean by ‘wake up?’ Of course we’re awake! How can we not be?”

“Maybe because I might not be truly awake,” I mutter to myself without really knowing why.

“What?” she frowns in confusion, having heard my murmur.

I sigh before admitting, “As I was saying before, you’re going to think I’m even more crazy when I say I can’t help but think that what I dreamt about was actually real, and all of ‘this’ is not real.” I say this last bit as I gesture to the reality—or what might not actually be reality—around us.

“How is this not real?” Hazel says like what I said is absolutely preposterous, even when it might not be. “Of course it is! You need to chill out; you’re starting to creep me out more than that psycho-guy outside.”

I pause, thinking about how best to explain the thoughts running through my head, but I can’t seem to come up with a good way to explain it, certainly not one she would believe. Even if I did know how to explain all of this, she would want proof, and there is no proof to show except for the things from my dream. Unless any of those things, specifically the Sontaran or blue box, miraculously show up, then she might believe me, but the chances of that happening are slim to none.

I sigh again, giving up. “I’m sorry. It was a weird night. Of course it was all just a dream. Nothing more. I’ll shut up about it now.”

“Thank you,” Hazel sighs in relief. “Wanna play Skee-Ball first? It seems like a good start to distract us from the man.”

I nod. “Sure, but just know that if a real Sontaran shows up, or even a blue police box, I’ll be saying ‘I told you so.’” Looking back, that may have sounded passive-aggressive, but I don’t care.

“Fine,” she shrugs, “though that’s highly doubtful. I’d rather see any one of those than that creepy guy again.”

“We’ll see,” I shrug back before we go about our day like nothing happened.

Over the course of two hours, we play various games, from Skee-Ball to Mini Golf. We attempt to climb through the tubes of the Children's Play Place (or at least the Ball Pit), even though it’s mostly made for kids than teens. I even try my hand at the same zombie-shooting game I played in my dream, and surprisingly, much like in the dream, I am able to beat the game again with the highest score. Nice to know I still have a knack with a gun, I chuckle silently to myself.

“Wow, Syd!” Hazel exclaims, impressed, after watching me beat the game for the second time, at least for me. “You're really good with a gun. I'll have to stay away from you if you ever decide to become a cop."

I immediately chortle at this, remembering her saying those exact words in my dream when she watched me play last time. “Oh my god!”

“What?” she frowns back at me, puzzled.

“You literally said the exact same thing to me when I beat the highest scorer last time in my dream,” I say, still chuckling.

“Seriously?” Hazel says, but I can’t tell if she says it in amazement or annoyance, but a part of me thinks it’s the latter.

“I’m not even kidding!” I say, shaking my head. “You really did. The same exact words in the same exact order.”

She sighs, and this time I know she said her last words, including these next ones, in annoyance. “Okay, I thought you said you were gonna stop talking about your dream.”

I sigh as well, feeling a bit depressed. “I know. I’m sorry. It’s just, when you said those words, it automatically made me think back to that moment in my dream. This will be the literal last time I’ll talk about it.” I truly mean it this time.

She says, sighing in relief again, “Yes, please make this be the last time.” She then says after a minute, seeming to have changed her mind, “How did you respond to what I said in your dream; about you becoming a cop since you were so good at that shooting game?”

I frown at her strange change of mind, which now seems legitimate. “I thought you said you didn’t want me to talk about it anymore.”

“Yeah, well, I lied,” she sighs in a seemingly regretful tone. “You got me hooked now. I want to know more.”

“You sure you’re not joshing me?” I ask, feeling a little suspicious.

“No, I really mean it,” Hazel says, and this time she actually sounds honest. “A small part of me wishes I’d been in your dream as well. I mean, you said I was in your dream, but I wanted to experience it as another dreamer.”

I nod. “Yeah, I get what you’re saying. Anyway, in the dream I responded by saying I didn’t care much for violence, not counting my Aikido lessons outside of school. In the dream, my guardians signed me up for Aikido lessons to defend myself, but it was years later that I found out that my Aikido instructor was a secret member of the organization that wanted to kill my true family, and he was also the one who trained my biological mother to kill my biological father, and he was secretly training me to do the same thing. Of course, I never actually killed my father at all; certainly not after I met him and found out he was actually a good man and one who cared about me as a true parent.”

“What happened to me in the dream?” Hazel asks curiously.

“After I revealed my secret to you about not being human,” I explain, “when I healed you with my Regeneration Energy after you were attacked by the Sontaran that attacked us here, you came with me to London after Graduation to go to college, but we were ambushed by the organization that was after us, called the Silence; ‘Vokanari’ was another name for them, which was named after their leader, Madame Kovarian, ‘Vokanari’ being an anagram of ‘Kovarian.’ We split up as a way to escape from them, but they ended up kidnapping you and taking you to their base where they were also holding my guardians as bait to get to me. They attempted to kidnap me too, but I was rescued at the last minute by my bio-mother, River Song, who took me to meet my bio-father, the Doctor—the ‘bow tie’ guy—and they told me who they were and why they gave me up. Later, the Doctor sent River to find you and my guardians, but she ended up being caught in the Silence’s trap as well and brainwashed onto their side again. At that point, it was up to the Doctor and I, as well as a trio of alien detectives from Victorian Times, and we managed to sneak into the Silence base in disguise as their members, and we were able to save you and everyone else.” I then pause before saying, “Well, sort of. Not everyone made it out alive. Both of my guardians were killed by the Silence. At least, my dad was, but my mother-guardian sacrificed herself to save the rest of us by staying behind and blowing up the base to get back at the Silence and their leader for everything they did to our family. Needless to say, the Doctor wasn’t too happy about it, but at least he was proud that I didn’t do the deed myself, as that would’ve been much worse. Also, you developed a massive crush on my father at the end, but I told you he was already taken,” I tease her to end my story.

“Were we okay in the end?” she asks, purposefully ignoring my teasing.

“Oh, yeah, absolutely,” I nod. “Even after I regenerated as a result from saving River from her brainwashing, you still saw me as your best friend, and we went to college together and continued our friendship like normal.”

“You said I was attacked here at the arcade,” she points out. “What exactly happened then?”

“Like I said, you were almost killed by a Sont—Oh my god!” I immediately pause when I see something I totally did not expect to see, especially in the real world. A short figure dressed in all-too-familiar purple armor (luckily wearing its helmet) walks into the arcade from outside, brandishing a large laser gun in hand.

“What?” Hazel asks, evidently puzzled, as her back is to the entrance.

“That’s it!” I say, pointing to the alien in absolute shock. “That’s the Sontaran right there! It’s real!”

“Sontar-Ha!” the alien exclaims as he aims his gun at us and immediately opens fire.

Chapter Text

“Get down!” I cry as I instinctively tackle Hazel to the floor behind the pinball machine. We manage to duck just in time as bright red laser beams sail right over our heads, burning holes through the wall and arcade machines behind us and sending sparks flying.

“Die, human scum!” the armored Sontaran screams and cackles maniacally as he shoots at and chases the other people as they duck for cover and/or flee in terror.

“I can’t believe it!” I exclaim, not out of fear but rather out of excitement, as I watch the Sontaran pass us by and head toward the back of the building. “I can’t believe it’s actually here! In real life! That means it wasn’t a dream, after all! It’s all real! That Sontaran is real!”

“Yea! It’s real; that’s so awesome!” Hazel says in a sarcastic tone instead of a joyous one. “Maybe we should celebrate after we manage to get out of here in one piece! If we manage to get out of here in one piece. I think I see a way out without getting shot. Let’s go!” At this, I immediately hear her move away from me, using the other arcade machines as cover, but pause again about ten feet away.

However, I pay her no mind, keeping my focus on the Sontaran. “But wait!” I ponder aloud. “If the Sontaran is real, then that means that everything else is real! The Doctor, River, the Silence—they’re all real too! Even the TARDIS is real!” None of it was all a dream like I previously thought. Every single part of what used to be just a dream is real!

But the question now is: how is it all real? More than that, how can I seem to remember two lives at once—my current life as well as my former life as Nova? How is this even possible?

As I am thinking all of this, Hazel groans, saying, “Great! Can we talk about this after we get out of here? I’m not sticking around to have an arm shot off for no reason!”

However, I speak to myself again like Hazel isn’t even here. “The last time this happened, the Sontaran was a bounty hunter sent out by the Silence to find and apprehend me, but I’m not Time Lord anymore, so therefore he’s not after me again. Or maybe he is still after me, maybe because I know too much, because I know of his true intentions and everything that happened in my dream—a dream that’s not actually a dream.”

Hazel groans again, this time tugging on my arm in seeming desperation. “Syd, wake up from this delusion! You’re not in a dream! You are in reality! If you die here, you will not wake up! Come on, we need to go!”

“You can go if you want,” I shrug back at her, pulling my arm away. “I’m staying here. I have to see what happens next!” From what I remember of my former life, my biological parents showed up not long after Hazel and I fled from the scene. Because we left, I didn’t get to meet my bio-parents until a few years later, and I was filled with much regret as a result. Perhaps if I stay here, that could change. I could meet them properly this time, like I was supposed to last time.

“What?” Hazel exclaims incredulously. “Are you crazy? You’ll get yourself killed! That’s what’s gonna happen next; I guarantee it!”

“I left last time, and that took away my opportunity to meet my parents,” I point out. “I could’ve met them much sooner had I stayed. In this world I might not get another chance to meet them. This could be my only opportunity. I’m staying.”

“You are crazy!” she confirms her previous rhetorical question, this time shaking her head and throwing her hands up in exasperation.

“Plus, I’d be doing them a favor by taking out the Sontaran again to make it easier for them to subdue him and send him to Space-Jail,” I add to my previous statement as if Hazel hadn’t said anything at all. “Rather, ‘the Shadow Proclamation,’ as my parents called it. Perhaps they’ll hire me as a companion once they see how knowledgeable I am in handling Sontarans.”

“Syd, stop!” Hazel groans for the third time in under a minute. “You’re talking absolute insanity! You’re gonna get yourself killed! Please, don’t do this! Let the real police handle it!”

“The police won’t be able to handle this,” I say, shaking my head confidently. “They will never understand. But my parents will. So will I. I already understand; I’ve lived through this once before and survived. I can do it again.”

Hazel groans yet again (no surprise). “Syd, how many times do I have to tell you? That. Was. Just. A. Dream!”

“Yeah, a dream that is now happening in real life!” I point out. “Maybe that wasn’t really a dream but rather a vision. I saw a vision of the future, and since it’s happening now, I’m supposed to carry it through ‘til the end, exactly like how I went about it last time. Only this time I’m not going to let you be involved. Your involvement almost got you killed last time, and I’m not going to let that happen again.”

“What?! Uh-uh! No way!” Hazel shakes her head vigorously. “If you must stay, I’m not letting you do this by yourself! I’m staying with you, for better or worse!”

“Even ‘til death do us part?” I ask with a chuckle, remembering us saying that to each other several times in my dream.

“I don’t want to die, period!” she scoffs, evidently thinking my joke to not be so funny. “I’d rather we just get the hell out of here and live another eight decades! I’m not sacrificing my life over a dream! I don’t live in dreams; I live in reality, and this is reality!”

I sigh, not wishing to argue. “Like I said, you can leave if you want, but I’m not gonna waste an opportunity to meet my parents—or who should be my parents. And an opportunity that should’ve been the first one all along.”

I pause, suddenly seeing the Sontaran entering the Laser Tag arena. “Look!” I say, pointing. “He entered the Laser Tag arena, just like last time! Are you coming?” I say this as I rise to my feet and prepare to go after the Sontaran.

“No!” Hazel scoffs in a ‘in what universe would I do such an outrageous thing?’ tone before changing it to a nervous-sounding one, “But at the same time I don’t want to leave you.”

“You can’t do both,” I say as I grab a lone laser gun from an unused vest hanging on the wall outside the arena to use like a club again. “You either come with me or go home. In fact, I recommend you go home, since you got hurt last time, and I don’t have the ability to heal you this time.” Needless to say, if Hazel gets hurt again, the damage will be permanent this time without my Regeneration Energy.

“I’m going with you,” she says as she grabs her own laser gun from another unused vest. “You can’t stop me.” Despite her fear, she holds the gun like a typical soldier would when ready to take out the approaching enemy army.

Against my better judgement, I sigh in agreement. “Fine. Let’s go. Be careful. The minute you see my parents—the Doctor and River, I mean—leave.”

Hazel scoffs at this. “Uh-huh, and miss the chance to travel through Time and Space in a blue box that’s bigger on the inside, no matter how ridiculous that sounds? Not happening!” She then adds in a murmur, despite there being no more people around since they fled the scene minutes ago, “Plus, I’m curious to see how good-looking your ‘Doctor’ dad really is…if he actually does exist.”

I snort at this before sighing again and rolling my eyes, “Come on.” With that, we enter the arena.

As we enter, we are met with a very disturbing sight. Various teenagers push past us, running for their lives, but several others were, unfortunately, not so lucky. These other teenagers lay sprawled across the floor with several holes having been burnt through their bodies that could only have been from a proper laser gun and not the plastic ones that Hazel and I wield.

However, it’s not until our eyes fall on the body of a familiar young boy that our hearts go into overdrive. The body is none other than the narcissistic peacock that, much like in my other life, I couldn’t shake for years because he always insisted on me going to practically every school event with him, and it was incredibly hard to say ‘no’ because he seemed to always refuse to take ‘no’ for an answer: Sam Davies.

“Oh my god!” Hazel gasps in fright upon seeing his limp body and cold eyes staring lifelessly in the distance, right through us. “That’s Sam Davies from our school! Is he dead?”

I kneel down and place my fingertips on the side of Sam’s neck, which feels cold as ice to the touch—as to be expected when touching a dead body—and that’s when I see a pea-sized hole burnt right into the back of his neck, right through to his Spinal Column, and I realize from this sight that checking his pulse is no longer needed. Instead, I nod, sighing sadly, “Yeah. Looks like he was shot in the back of the neck; see the laser hole there? No one could’ve survived a shot like that.”

“How could that thing do this to him?” Hazel says angrily. “I mean, I know everyone hated him coz he annoyed everyone with his narcissism, but…yeah.”

“Because that’s what Sontarans do,” I say as I rise back to my feet from Sam’s body, seething in my own anger. “They kill for no other reason than for simple pleasure. Much like the Silence. I guarantee this sicko was sent out by the Silence to attack this place. But why? Why here and why now? Like I said, last time it was sent out to look for me, but I’m not Time Lord this time; I’m just me—human and powerless and boring.” Why would a Sontaran care to target a lame, Podunk town like ours? Why would anyone?

“Are you saying all humans are powerless and boring?” Hazel scoffs, evidently offended by my previous comment.

“No, I don’t mean it like that,” I say with a slight groan. “I’m just saying, in my dream I had ‘powers,’ specifically the ability to conjure up golden energy from my hands to heal any injury. If only I had that ability now…” I then shake my head, knowing this to be the real world; therefore I can’t save Sam. “But like I said, I’m not Time Lord anymore, so I can’t save him. But we can save everybody else by stopping this Sontaran, and you are going to help me.” Perhaps Hazel could be useful again, after all; granted, she doesn’t get shot in the arm again, or worse in a much more fatal place.

“Me?” Hazel asks, puzzled. “I thought you said you didn’t want me involved.”

“I changed my mind,” I shrug in reply. “I’m going to distract him while you sneak up behind him and use your gun to whack him on the Probic Vent on the back of his neck.” I say this as I raise my laser gun and mimic using it like a club. “It’ll knock him right out, just as long as you hit the vent hard enough.”

The more I speak, the more nervous Hazel seems to become. “You want me to do this?” she asks, still seeming in total disbelief. “I’ll die! Also, what the heck’s a Probic Vent?”

“A Probic Vent is a little hole on the back of the Sontaran’s armor on the collar,” I explain. “You’ll know it when you see it. That’s its weak spot—like an Achilles’ Heel but on the neck instead. And no, you won’t die. I trust you. You can do this. Do you trust me?” This exact thing worked last time; granted, our roles were swopped. Surely it’ll work again, right?

“Is this what you had me do last time?” she asks, still seeming hesitant about the whole thing.

I shrug again. “Sort of, except it was the other way around. I was the one who whacked him on the back of his neck while you did the distracting. Actually he was distracted by you being shot by him, but that’s beside the point. This time I’m going to be the one doing the distracting so you don’t get shot this time.”

Hearing this makes Hazel’s nervousness reach peek point (yeah, maybe I should’ve left out the part about her getting shot last time). “How do you know I won’t be shot this time?”

I sigh, feeling unsure, but I don’t admit it. Instead, I say, “Like I said, you’re just gonna have to trust me. Do you trust me?”

“I’m still not sure about this,” she says as she grips her laser gun like how a scared child would to his/her stuffed toy.

“You can do this,” I say in an attempt to muster more confidence between us. “I’ll give you a signal, and that’ll be your que to whack him.”

“What signal?” Hazel asks curiously.

“You’ll see,” I say before sighing, “Let’s do this.”

Ignoring any and all further protests from my childhood best friend, I sneak around the luminescent walls until I am in the Sontaran’s direct line of vision.

“Hey, Strax!” I scream once I’m out in the open, hiding my own laser gun behind my back. “Long time no see!” I decide to call the Sontaran ‘Strax,’ even though I know it isn’t Strax but rather a clone of him. “Long way from home, aren’t you? About…what, 420 years or so? Madame Vastra and Jenny must be wondering where their butler disappeared to. Clearly you decided to ‘disappear’ to here. Gee, I wonder why.” I say this last phrase with a bit of sarcasm, remembering the real Strax having had a mega-crush on me in my dream (yeah, that wasn’t creepy at all). “Come to visit your crush, I imagine. Sorry, she’s seeing someone else.” I say this as I suddenly think of that cloaked boy that was a member of the Silence, but despite this he helped me and my friends around the base in search of my kidnapped family. I remember his astonishingly attractive eyes, and I found myself absolutely mesmerized by them the moment our eyes locked with one another. I even remember the odd yet satisfying warmth I felt when our eyes locked—that so-called ‘spark’ that reeled us together. What I would give to feel that again…

I shake my head. No. This isn’t a time to be thinking about boys, especially ones that don’t exist. It’s time to focus.

Not-Strax frowns at me, pointing his gun at me, and says, “You are mistaken, puny human scum! I am Commander Stinx of the Twenty-Sixth Sontaran Fleet and honorary member of the Church of Silence! Surrender, or I will destroy you for the glory of Sontar and of Madame Nova!”

I immediately chortle with laughter at the ridiculous name. “‘Stinx?’ That’s your name? Wow! That is absolutely hilarious! Yeah, I was wondering what that awful smell was; glad to know it’s not me. Also, you say you’re a member of the Silence? That’s interesting. Never thought I’d see a Sontaran work for them.”

I suddenly pause. That name… No… It couldn’t have been… That’s impossible…

“Wait!” I say, feeling more disturbed by the second. He did… He did use that name… “You said a name. Nova? As in, Nova Susan Song, the Doctor’s daughter? She is your madam? How is that possible? What happened to Madame Kovarian?” Perhaps she got reduced to mashed potatoes again like last time, and a large part of me regrets having not seen that a second time.

However, I am also shocked to know that my other self, Nova, is real in this world, but with a cruel twist far worse than Death itself: she seems to have taken over Madame Kovarian’s position as the new leader of the Silence organization. I dread to find out what exactly happened there, and I can feel my palms sweating and a massive shiver run down my spine just thinking about it.

How could this have happened? This wasn’t supposed to happen…

I have no time to think any further on the subject as the Sontaran says, frowning in confusion, “How do you know my former madam’s name? Explain this absurd—HALT!” He is suddenly interrupted as he catches Hazel sneaking up from behind him in preparation to swing the plastic laser gun down on the Probic Vent on the back of its armored neck. He catches her right as she attempts to slip back behind the luminescent wall she was hiding behind and awaiting my signal, but she was too early, hence how she got caught. If only I’d given her the signal when I was supposed to… If only I wasn’t distracted…

“Hazel!” I cry in horror as the Sontaran grabs her by the shoulder and throws her to the floor beside me. The laser gun she was wielding is knocked out of her hand upon impact with the floor.

“How dare you attempt to defeat me!” the Sontaran screams at Hazel. “I shall destroy you for this injustice!” He then raises his gun and immediately shoots Hazel in the forearm again, but the beam only hit her in the arm because she lifted it to shield herself from the shot, and the shot hit her arm instead of her heart where the Sontaran was initially intending to shoot. Hazel screams in pain, clutching her burnt arm.

“NO!” I scream, the horror having been immediately replaced with anger.

“Prepare to die in agony for the glory of Sontar!” the Sontaran shouts as he raises his gun again.

Before he has a chance to shoot again, I immediately rush at him and tackle him to the floor with the speed of a striking cobra. The force knocks the bald-headed alien over and makes him lose his grip on his gun. I immediately kick it away with my foot before sitting on the alien’s back, the Probic Vent completely exposed. “Sontar-SUCK IT, SHIT-HEAD!” I bellow before swinging my plastic laser gun down on the Vent with all my strength, knocking the Vent clean off of its armor. Even after that, I continue hammering down on the Sontaran’s neck and head until he stops moving altogether.

Once I’m satisfied that the Sontaran is completely motionless, I slowly rise from his back, tossing the plastic laser gun aside, out of breath.

“Damn, girl!” Hazel exclaims in absolute shock and seeming to have totally forgotten about her injury. “Remind me never to piss you off!”

I shrug. “Meh, it was easy. Did the same thing I did last time, just slightly differently. Sontarans are tough warriors, but they got shit for brains, hence the nickname ‘shit-head.’ I guess that’s what you get for cloning a clone over and over.”

This statement makes me think back on what my father (the Doctor) said about Sontaran clones and how they can sometimes become defective the more clones are cloned, hence why Sontarans in general are not as intelligent as one thinks them to be. This fact makes me think about how easy it was to take down this Sontaran; he went down like a sack of baked potatoes, and not just because he looks like a baked potato. I am also impressed that I still possess the knowledge from my Aikido classes in my dream, and I was able to use them just as skillfully in the real world.

My thoughts are suddenly interrupted when I hear an all-too-familiar British female voice say from behind in a very impressed tone, “You sure got that right, which is very surprising.”

I immediately look up, shocked, to see the familiar face of none other than my own mother, River Song.

Chapter Text

“Mom!” I exclaim, happy to see her after months of being apart; though at the same time it feels like we’ve been apart for years—sixteen years, to be exact.

“‘Mum?’” she says with a confused frown, a look of genuine unfamiliarity evident on her face, which I find strange. “I think you might be mistaken, young lady. I don’t believe we’ve ever met prior to this moment. You must have me confused with someone else.”

“Sure we’ve met,” I frown back at her in my own confusion as to why she doesn’t recognize me.

Immediately after I say this, it suddenly dawns on me. When I glanced at my reflection, I seemed to possess an entirely different face from the one I donned in my dream; knowing this, of course she wouldn’t recognize me. I no longer look like my mother anymore.

“Or…we were supposed to know each other…” I add in a slightly unsure tone. “In another life…”

“Wow, Syd, that didn’t sound creepy at all,” Hazel mutters under her breath loud enough for only me to hear.

Thinking back on my previous statement, I realize that it could’ve been phrased much better, whereas my words just escalated the awkwardness in the room. This I can tell just from River’s genuine look of uneasiness. “Yeah, sorry, that did sound a little creepy,” I admit, shaking my head. “What I meant to say is we do know each other; rather, I know you, but in another life.” I pause, realizing I’ve made yet another unintentional error in my words and brought in more discomfort between us. “No, wait, that’s exactly what I said before, just worded slightly differently. Anyway, my point is that I kno—”

I am interrupted mid-sentence when I hear another familiar voice—this time a man’s voice—enter the vicinity from the darkness behind River, as well as a high-pitched buzzing sound from what I immediately recognize to be a sonic screwdriver. “River?” the man calls to her as he emerges from the darkness, revealing the all-too-familiar ancient-but-young-looking face of my father, the Doctor. “Are you alright? Did you take care of the Sontaran?” He brandishes his sonic out in front of him like how a shiny-armored knight would use a sword to ward off an evil threatening his distressed damsel.

In fact, River is far from your typical damsel in distress; usually she is the one doing all the rescuing. However, this time she stands there, staring, perplexed, at the downed, motionless alien on the floor between us. “Not exactly, sweetie,” she says to her husband. “It seems these girls beat me to it. And surprisingly well, in fact.” She glances back-and-forth between the Sontaran’s body and me as if trying to comprehend how I acquired the skill to do such a thing.

However, I am too focused on my father to have any care in explaining at the moment. “Da—” I start to exclaim in excitement, but I immediately stop myself and correct myself, remembering how River reacted to me calling her ‘Mom’ earlier. “Er, Doctor! It’s so good to see you again!”

“How did you handle the Sontaran on your own?” he frowns at me, puzzled. “Also, how do you know me?”

“How else?” I say in a tone like it should be obvious, shrugging. “I went for the weak spot—the back of its neck. As for how I know you… Well…that’s complicated…”

“Try me,” my father says in a careless tone, shrugging back. “I know a thing or two about ‘complicated.’”

“Understatement,” I snort loudly, and, surprisingly, I hear River say it at the exact same time. We both glance at each other in absolute shock—at least, River looks at me like that, clearly not expecting a strange girl to say something that said strange girl knew she was going to say as well—and the Doctor glances back-and-forth between us in seeming confusion or offence (I honestly can’t decide, as it’s very hard to tell with him sometimes).

“Tell me!” he says again, steering back on topic. “How do you know me?” He then shakes his head. “Actually, let me rephrase that. How much do you know about me?”

Gosh, where do I even start? I think sarcastically in my head. “Honestly, everything,” I say with a sigh, deciding to just wing it. “Well, not everything, per se. I don’t know your true name, but I do know you usually go by ‘the Doctor,’ or sometimes ‘John Smith.’ I know you’re a time-traveler and the last Time Lord of Gallifrey in the Constellation of Kasterborous. I know you travel around in a blue police box, which you call a ‘TARDIS,’ that’s bigger on the inside than it is on the outside. I know you’ve lived at least twelve lives in twelve-hundred years. I know you married the woman who was originally meant to assassinate you but ultimately refused to assassinate you—awesome job making that decision, by the way; serves those ‘Silence’ sickos right, am I right?” I say this last bit with a thumbs-up toward River before listing all the things I know about her.

“And you, Doctor River Song—or is it Professor Song now?—your life is much more complicated. Your birth name was Melody Pond, funnily enough, named after yourself twice over—the first time being named after your parents’ childhood best friend, and the second time being named after the Doctor’s best friend, now lover. You were stolen from your parents, Amelia Pond and Rory Williams, at birth by a wicked organization called the Silence to be trained to kill the Doctor, at least before you found out the truth about him, fell in love with him based on that truth, and married him. You received a doctorate in Archaeology at Luna University in the 51^st Century and have been weaving your way through Time and Space, meeting various incarnations of your husband at different points in his life out of the correct order of Time.”

I pause, suddenly noticing my parents’ bewildered faces, and I finish with a shrug, “I could go on.” However, I purposefully choose not to add in the fact that they supposedly have a daughter named Nova, since I’m not fully certain as to what happened to her, despite what the Sontaran said about her. It just can’t be true…can it? It just can’t…

“Impressive…” my father admits with raised eyebrows. And totally not creepy at all, he adds in his head; at least that’s what I imagine him to be thinking, based on the incredulous look he gives me.

Though at the same time, I can’t help but think how utterly surreal this all feels. As my parents, you’d think the Doctor and River would know exactly who I am, therefore they would accept my knowledge of them with no problem. However, it’s the exact opposite. They don’t know who I am, and yet they seem to struggle to comprehend how a complete stranger would know so much about them. Perhaps they think I am someone they will inevitably grow close to in the future (a thought that immediately makes me think of that one word my mother always says: “spoilers”), but in reality that’s not the case at all. I honestly don’t know what is happening in this world, but one thing I do know is that this shouldn’t be happening. This event was supposed to happen much differently. I was supposed to run with Hazel back to her house and heal her arm with my Regeneration Energy and meet my parents in London a few years later, but instead I am meeting them here but as a regular human—someone who is not their true daughter, hence why they don’t know who I am. This event wasn’t meant to happen like this, and yet it did, and I don’t know why or what led to it happening in this way. Did my life get rewritten somehow? Did I somehow get zapped to a parallel universe where the same events happen, but they happen differently?

Or is this some kind of test? Could I be stuck in a twisted simulation, and I am being tested? If so, what is the test, and what am I supposed to do to pass it? Why am I being tested? What will happen once I pass the test? Would I be sent back home, back to being who I was before? Would my life be back to normal? Would I go back to my real world as a Time Lord, or will I stay human? Would things be the same once I go back, depending on whether I’m Time Lord or human, or will they be different?

What the hell is going on?!

I shrug, completely unable to comprehend any further on the situation. “Like I said, it’s complicated as to how I know all this stuff. I’d tell you, but I fear I’ll rip a hole in Space-Time doing so. I don’t exactly belong here—in this world, I mean. That, in itself, is especially complicated to explain.” Hazel sighs and rolls her eyes in seeming boredom at this, which I ignore.

The Doctor looks like he’s about to speak when River beats him to it, saying in an urgent tone, “Doctor, we need to wrap this up. I can already hear police sirens outside. Needless to say, I don’t want to spend another twelve-thousand life sentences in prison, and I don’t think you want to either.” Now that she mentions it, I begin hearing police sirens as well.

“Noted,” her husband nods, gesturing down at the Sontaran’s body. “Send this guy off, and we’ll be on our way.”

“No need, my love,” River says, shaking her head as she kneels down by the bald-headed alien’s body. “He’s dead.”

“What?” the Doctor and I both exclaim in unison. I actually killed him? I think to myself in shock; though, admittedly, I can’t decide if I feel grateful or remorseful about the murder, considering how many people he killed.

“This is its Probic Vent,” River confirms as she raises a small, circular disk between her fingers. “It appears to have been knocked completely off of its armor, therefore killing the Sontaran outright.” She then says, glancing up at me knowingly, “Clearly you have some remarkable skill in handling Sontarans, young lady. I must say I’m impressed.” Her face then changes into a seemingly distrustful glare. “But I am also curious as to how you know so much. A girl your age shouldn’t possess such knowledge, and yet you do. Clearly it wasn’t out of sheer luck.”

Admittedly, a small part of me wants to lie and say that it was just luck, but, knowing my parents, they can, in fact, see right through lies (“Rule 1: the Doctor lies”), so I tell them the truth.

“I’ve dealt with Sontarans before,” I shrug, trying to make it sound like it’s not overly important. “I’ve fought a few in my other life, even befriended one. Your ol’ pal, Strax, of the Paternoster Gang?” I figure my parents’ relationship with them hasn’t changed, at least much.

River frowns at me, confirming my theory. “How do you know them? They’re from way before your time—from back in Victorian Times. And what is this ‘other life’ you keep mentioning? Who are you?” The more she speaks, the more suspicious and stressed out she sounds.

The Doctor must sense this, because he speaks up and says calmly as a way to ease the tension between us, “River, we can discuss this later, once we get back to the TARDIS. If this guy is truly dead, we’ll take him with us, and I’ll fly us to the nearest star to have his body burned.” At these words, River reluctantly does what he says, taking out a futuristic device that I don’t ever remember seeing her use, seemingly preparing to use it to teleport the alien dwarf’s body to the space/time-ship.

“By ‘nearest star,’ you mean The Sun, right?” I ask to clarify. “Our Sun?”

“Yes, obviously,” he nods before pointing at me, “and you are coming with us.”

“I am?” I ask at the same time as River asks, “She is?” However, she asks the question like it’s the most ridiculous idea in the universe, and I can’t help but feel slightly hurt at her seemingly intended rudeness.

However, at the same time, I understand why she would be reluctant to agree to let me accompany them. Obviously, they don’t know me (at least the real me), so inviting me into their dangerous life and exposing me to their darkest secrets would be absolute insanity. However, what they also don’t know—at least in this world—is that I am already familiar with their dangerous life and dark secrets that accompany it, having lived it all for several months in my world. Perhaps the Doctor senses this about me (of course, as we’re still technically telepathically linked…right?), which is why he’s seemingly choosing to trust me and, therefore, permit me to go with them.

“Yes,” he says with a sincere nod, confirming my theory to be true. “I sense something highly unusual about you, specifically your knowledge of Sontarans and, by extension, us. I’m highly interested in knowing how and even why.”

I shrug. “Like I said, It’d be very hard to explain, since I feel like this isn’t my proper world.”

At this point, I’m starting to think my ‘parallel universe’ theory might actually be true, since it’s starting to feel more like that now. Then again, my ‘simulation’ theory could also be true. Or perhaps I’m dealing with both scenarios at the same time, if that’s even possible. Once I actually bring up the courage to admit my theories, perhaps my father might know whether it’s possible or not.

My thoughts are interrupted when the dead Sontaran suddenly vanishes into thin air, a bright light taking its place and vanishing just as suddenly, leaving the feeling of static electricity in the air between us. “Whoa!” I gasp on instinct, despite being used to seeing things like this with my mother when she uses her Vortex Manipulator to teleport across Space-Time.

“The deed is done, my love,” she says to the Doctor as she returns the device back in her pocket. “We should go.”

He nods. “Yes, let’s go out the side door and loop back around to the TARDIS to avoid the police.”

“What about the cameras?” I ask, remembering there being cameras in the arena to watch the players as they play the game, which is something that I often forgot when I played in the past (though whether this is a true ‘Sydney’ memory or a true ‘Nova’ memory, I don’t know). “There are cameras all over this area as a way to watch the players. Wouldn’t they have caught everything?” This statement also makes me remember the ‘Nova’ memory in which I saw my parents on the CCTV footage that was caught shortly after Hazel and I fled from the scene, only for it to have disappeared from the entire Internet when the Doctor was deleting himself from History in order to hide from the Silence so they didn’t discover that he was still alive after the ‘Lake Silencio’ incident (I can’t believe that was two years ago, at least in this world).

“Don’t worry,” my father assures me as he raises his sonic. “I used this to disable the cameras before we came in here. We’re perfectly safe. Come on.” He then asks, glancing to Hazel, “I’m assuming she knows as well?”

“No!” Hazel says at the same time as I say, “Yes!”

The Doctor immediately frowns at this, prompting me to add with a shrug, “She sort of knows. I’ll explain it more when we’re out of here. She’s coming too.” Hazel immediately frowns at me in absolute disbelief, but I ignore her.

“Fine,” he nods, narrowing his eyes in a way like he can’t decide whether or not to trust me. He then says to Hazel with concern, noticing her arm, which she clutches in pain, “You’re injured.”

I nod, sighing shamefully, “Yeah. The Sontaran shot her…again.” I mutter the word ‘again’ under my breath in anger and feeling more ashamed now that I’ve made this happen twice in the same way.

My father shakes his head with a smile. “Don’t worry, I can fix it back at the TARDIS. You know this place better; where’s the back exit?” Once we tell him, he nods again, saying, “Okay, follow us. Don’t get caught.” River continues to frown distrustfully at us as she passes us and immediately follows her husband down the lit back ‘employees only’ hallway, and Hazel and I follow wearily after them.

“Syd! What the hell is going on?” Hazel demands once the duo are out of earshot.

“Remember the time-travelers I told you about that were my parents?” I sigh. “The two Time Lords; well, Time Lord and half-Time Lord?”

“Is that them?” Hazel nods at their backs as they continue down the hall, seemingly paying no attention to us.

I nod before saying in a smug tone, “Yup. I told you they were real.” I then mutter under my breath, suddenly thinking of my alleged evil twin, “The question now is: where is Nova?”

“Nova?” River speaks up in a shocked tone, having overheard me. “You know my daughter?” The Doctor also pauses in his tracks, but he keeps his back to us, seemingly refusing to let us see his face and how much that name affects him, which appears to be negative.

I pause, suddenly feeling uncomfortable. “I… She’s real?” I awkwardly rephrase my question once I see River’s confused look. “I-I-I mean, is she with you?” Thinking back on what the Sontaran said about their daughter having allegedly taken over Madame Kovarian’s ‘leader’ position, assuming it’s actually true (Dear God, please don’t be true), I begin wondering if they already know what happened to her, and if they don’t, I dread to find out how they would react once I tell them the horrible truth.

A tense silence fills the hallway before it is broken by the Doctor’s deep, angry whisper, “She’s gone.”

“W-What do you mean?” I hesitantly ask, even though I feel I already know the answer. Perhaps they do know what happened to her… “What hap—?”

“I don’t want to talk about it!” he snaps abruptly, shaking his head, before he stomps furiously out of earshot, not wishing to continue the subject any further. Another awkward silence fills the hallway as a result.

“She was taken from us,” River whispers after a few seconds with a mournful sigh and a slight choke to her voice, her emerald eyes filling with tears as she watches her husband. “Kidnapped at birth. Just like me…”

“By the Silence,” I nod understandingly, remembering the same thing almost happening to me in my other world.

“Yes,” River frowns again, turning back to me. “How did you—”

“I told you, I know everything,” I remind her. “I’ll explain it all at the TARDIS. And yes, I’m fully aware of what that is too—rather, what she is. ‘Time and Relative Dimension in Space.’ Or, as I like to call her, ‘Idris.’”

“Hmm…” River says, raising a quizzical eyebrow. “It seems you have quite a lot to explain. More like an entire story to tell.”

Mother, you have no idea, I snort to myself.

Thinking about it, it feels ironic saying it now, since River should know everything as my mother, at least in my world. It feels almost sacrilegious for the Doctor and River not to know anything now. Apparently things are very different in this world in contrast to mine, and I wonder if the reason why I was sent to this world is to correct what’s happened and turn it back to the way it was supposed to happen in my world. Perhaps I’m supposed to bring the Time Lord family back together again by saving their daughter from the Silence and turning her back to who she was supposed to be, from before the Silence succeeded in taking her away. Whatever happened that made the Doctor fail in saving his daughter this time, perhaps I’m supposed to correct that moment, and only then would I be allowed to be sent back to my universe.

The question now is: how am I supposed to go back and change it? Normally that can’t be done since I’d be going back on my own timeline, but this may not be my timeline but rather Nova’s—as in the ‘Nova’ from this universe—so maybe I (Sydney) have a chance, since I’m from a different universe. Or, if I can’t go back to that moment at all, how would I change her in the present/future? Considering how long she’s been in league with the Silence, it seems impossible, but maybe this is my only option, or I’m stuck here with this identity forever.

“If it’s true you say you’re ‘from another world,’” River says, interrupting me from my thoughts, “and you know our daughter in that other world, perhaps you can explain to us how to get our daughter back in this world.”

My eyes widen in shock. Whoa… Did she just read my mind?

“That might be a bit difficult,” I admit with a shrug. “For all I know, maybe I might actually be in a parallel world. The Doctor did tell me about them once—er, my Doctor, anyway.” Here, I decide to leave out the part about him being my true father and decide to save it for later when I reveal everything to them. “Although,” I continue with a shrug, “I can’t seem to remember how I got to this world to begin with. Something must’ve happened to me, but I can’t remember.”

Try as I might, I can’t remember anything. The only thing I can do is guess what happened. Perhaps something happened to me on a recent adventure with my father that zapped us—or perhaps I was the only one who got zapped and not him—to this world, and somehow whatever ‘zapped’ us gave us new identities. It seems as though I was given back my ‘Sydney Elise’ identity, but I am uncertain as to what identity my father was given if he was also zapped with me. If this is true, then the Doctor who stands on the other side of the hallway is not my true father—in other words, that Doctor is a Doctor from this universe and not my own—but my true father could be somewhere else with a completely different identity; he could literally be anyone in the entire world. If this is true, I wonder where my true father is and how to turn him back to his true ‘Doctor’ persona as well as my own.

Speaking of ‘turning us back into our true selves,’ I wonder if this is the so-called ‘test’ I have to pass, if it’s true this is all a sim. My ‘test’ is to find my parallel self (‘Evil Psychopath’ Nova) and turn her back to who she was originally supposed to be—kind, loving, adventurous Nova a.k.a. me. If I accomplish this task, I can go back home to my true family. In other words, I can ‘wake up’ back to my world; perhaps that was what that crazy guy outside the arcade meant when he was screaming “wake up” continuously in my face. Perhaps I was right all along; this ‘world’ isn’t real, after all. The only way to be certain is that I do whatever it takes to help my parents in this world get their daughter back, and I have a feeling it will be no easy feat; not by a longshot.

“I’m sure the Doctor—my Doctor—will figure it out,” River smiles at me in an assuring manner. “Is your friend from your world?” she asks, glancing back at Hazel, and for a moment I actually forget that she’s there.

I glance back at her as well, her mannerisms appearing to be quite standoffish from the way she shuffles awkwardly on her feet. “I don’t think so. If she was, she’d know you guys as well.”

“I thought you said she did know us,” River says, raising a quizzical eyebrow.

“Through me, yes,” I confirm, “but…not really.”

“So you lied?” my mother frowns before turning back toward her husband’s back, “Hmm, sounds like another person I know.”

I do get it from him, I snort in my head before I admit out loud with an exhausted sigh, “It’s not like that. I mean, I kinda lied, but not really. I just don’t know how to explain everything in a way that you’ll believe me. Trust me, everything I will say later will totally shock you, and I seriously doubt you’ll believe me afterward. Though at the same time, depending on how you react, it may prove my ‘me being from another world’ theory to be true.” That, or my ‘sim’ theory, I add in my head.

“We shall see, won’t we?” she says before saying “Excuse me,” as she runs to catch up with her grieving husband, and they begin having a private conversation that I can’t hear.

“I don’t know about this, Syd,” Hazel speaks up for the first time in several minutes once both of my folks are out of earshot.

I frown. “What’re you talking about? I told you, they’re my parents—my real parents. We can trust them.” I don’t see why she wouldn’t.

“I don’t mean that,” she shakes her head. “I mean I don’t know if I should be here; like here, here. I have absolutely no idea what the hell is going on, and because of that I should leave. We should leave. Besides, I need medical attention, anyway.”

“Dad said he could help you—the Doctor, I mean,” I assure her, even though it doesn’t seem to be working. “I bet he’s gonna heal you exactly the way I healed you last time. He’s gonna use his Regeneration Energy. Trust me, that’ll be way batter than going to a boring hospital. You’ll see; it’s absolutely amazing.”

“I don’t think I should go with you,” she says, shaking her head again. “Honestly, I feel like a third wheel at this point—er, fourth wheel, I guess. Plus, I get the feeling that those people are not safe to be around.”

“That’s not their fault,” I say in another fruitless attempt to change her mind. “Yeah, it’s part of their lifestyle, but that’s not something they can control. But they are good people.”

I immediately stop talking when I hear my parents begin yelling at each other, seeming to have a serious disagreement.

“I really think she can help us, sweetie,” River says to her husband, seeming to assure him of something else, but she seems to also be failing at it. “She knows her. Just give her a chance.”

“It’s been sixteen years, River!” the Doctor argues back at her. “There is no fixing what they did to our daughter! She’s been under their control for too long! You remember the last time I tried to even talk to her normally? That didn’t go well at all! There is no way to save her! It’s impossible!”

“Since when are things truly impossible for you, Doctor?” she says in a way like she knows him much better than that, and she’s astounded that he doesn’t know any better. “We’ll find a way! We always do. With her knowledge, she can help us find a way; I guarantee it. I trust her.”

It is now evident to me that my mother is fighting to have my back, seeming to believe everything I’ve told her so far, but my father seems far from believing me and is too blinded by his own rage to give me a chance to help them, which makes me sad for him but also slightly guilty, as I remember treating him in the exact same way when I first met him in my other life, not believing him when he said I couldn’t have a normal life as a Time Lord and as his daughter.

“We don’t even know her name!” he protests. “Who’s to say she could be another one of their pawns? She knows too much already—things she’s not supposed to know! We can’t trust her, River.”

Okay, this is insane. Apparently, he—my own father—thinks I’m secretly working for the Silence, and that’s why I know so much about him! Seriously?!

Thankfully, River seems to think otherwise. “But she knows our daughter, at least one from her universe! At least, that’s what I understand from what she said. Isn’t that enough? She could use what she knows about her Nova to bring back our Nova! Please, Doctor, give her a chance.”

Apparently, this is the last straw for my father. “I can’t!” he exclaims. “I can’t lose anybody else to them! Not today! Not ever again!” Having had enough, he stomps off out of building and toward the TARDIS, leaving River alone with us once more. She sighs and glances sadly back at us, seeming to have given up trying to convince her husband to trust me into helping him save his corrupt daughter, a task that does seem truly impossible. After a few seconds, she turns back toward the door and rushes after him.

I immediately follow as Hazel says, gesturing toward them, “See? Even they seem to agree that we should go. They clearly don’t trust us; that being said, we should leave.”

“No,” I say, shaking my head as we exit the building entirely and watch as my father forces his way into the TARDIS, my mother following close behind but leaving the door slightly ajar for us to follow when we’re ready. Meanwhile, several Emergency Service members, including police and medical officers, rush in and out of the building, helping anyone and everyone in need. “I think… I think River is right. I think I can save her daughter. Maybe that’s the key to return to my universe; that is, if I’m truly from another universe… I turn my evil self back to being good—the girl that she was supposed to be—I can go home.”

Hazel frowns, seemingly thinking my idea to be absolutely ridiculous. “Do you honestly think you’re from another universe? Really?”

I shrug, glancing back toward the open TARDIS. “I can’t really be certain, but if I go with them, maybe I can find out.” I then say, turning back to Hazel, “You coming?”

She huffs, stepping back, “I can’t! This is crazy! All this time you talked about all this like it was a dream, but it’s not; it’s all real! I just… I can’t even begin to figure out how to believe all of this! This is insane! I want no part of it!” In seeming panic, she begins rushing back to her car rather than toward the ambulance that accompanied the police.

“Come on, Haze, don’t go!” I call back to her in absolute disbelief that she chooses to abandon me rather than help me like a true friend should. “I need your help! I can’t do this without you!” Normally at this time I would use the phrase ‘friends stick together for better or worse,’ knowing that to be our sacred oath, but I am now starting to accept that this Hazel isn’t my Hazel from my universe, so that phrase won’t work on her. Not this time.

Astonishingly, my theory is confirmed when she says, shaking her head, meaning every word, “Either you come with me, or I’m saying ‘goodbye!’”

“What?” I say, in total disbelief. Is this a joke?!

“You’ve changed!” Hazel says, in tears at this point, seeming like she is genuinely afraid of me now. “I don’t even know who you are anymore! I thought you were my friend! Who the hell are you?”

Seriously ?! What the actual hell?!

I snort, still thinking this to be a joke, even when it is now clearly evident that it is far from a joke. “Haze, you know who I am! We’ve known each other since the First Grade! Why are you saying this?”

At this point she seems to have had enough. She raises her hands up in surrender, wincing as she does so, as she continues to step backwards away from me and toward the busy parking lot. “Forget it! I’m done! Have fun with the other freaks in your freakshow! Leave me out of it! It’s over!”

I laugh, refusing to believe this is actually happening. “Haze, come on! You’re being ridiculous!”

She immediately pauses, seeming offended. “Oh, I’m being ridiculous? Why don’t you speak for yourself, freak! You’re living in a fantasy! Wake the hell up, Syd! Wake up!” At this, she turns on her heel and walks away for real, legitimately turning her back on me and heading back toward her car.

I continue yelling after her in a fruitless attempt to change her mind, desperate for her not to leave me. “Haze! Come back! Please!” She doesn’t listen as she continues back to her car, never looking back. I watch as she gets in her car and drives off without a second thought, leaving me behind seemingly for good.

I begin sobbing uncontrollably at the fact that I had just lost my best and only friend, all to some stupid dream. If it hadn’t come to life like it has, this would never have happened. Then again, maybe it was always meant to come to life; in fact, it was always real from the very beginning. Unfortunately, Hazel will never believe it, and at this point I don’t care if she won’t. As much as I hate to admit it, she’s not my Hazel and never will.

Unexpectedly, a gentle hand grips my shoulder, and, fortunately, I have felt this particular hand on my shoulder so many times to recognize it as my mother’s.

“I’m sorry,” she whispers apologetically from my side.

I don’t even think twice as I wrap my arms around her, finding comfort in her embrace. “If only she could understand… I wish she could understand…” I don’t admit this to her, but a small part of me misses my old life as Nova—the proper Nova from my universe—and I desperately want it back.

“Unfortunately, this is something she will never understand,” River sighs sadly, laying her head on top of mine sympathetically like a true mother would. “Very few people understand, and we’re some of the lucky few who do.”

“I wouldn’t really call it ‘lucky,’” I mutter under my breath in disagreement.

This statement makes me think back to my ‘Nova’ life, remembering how I felt when I first found out I wasn’t human when I first met the Doctor and River, and even them admitting that things would get more complicated as a non-human, and I remember how much that sucked. Now, I feel like I’m feeling all of that all over again, and it makes me more desperate to return to my other world, remembering how I was actually starting to get used to being non-human with my father’s help toward the end.

However, in this world, my father seems to want absolutely nothing to do with me, which isn’t like him at all, but at the same time I completely understand how he feels. Obviously he feels immense anger and guilt toward himself for what’s happened to his daughter, and he desperately wants to fix it but doesn’t seem to know how, no matter what he tries to do, and because of this he seems to have given up, which is also not like him. In fact, this goes against everything he stands for—“Never be cruel or cowardly. Never give up. Never give in”—and I’m pretty sure he knows it, but he doesn’t seem to care anymore. Even when my mother tries countless times to convince him otherwise, it still doesn’t change his mind. He seems to have completely lost hope, and I desperately want to help him regain that hope.

If only he would let me help him. More than that, if only he would accept me as his true daughter, since I am his true daughter (even if I am from another universe), maybe this will help him change his mind. If only…

“Perhaps ‘lucky’ was the wrong way to describe it,” River chuckles like it’s a joke, even when it really isn’t, “but I understand what you mean.”

“It hardly matters anymore,” I sigh, shaking my head and pulling away from her embrace. “This isn’t my world, anyway. My Hazel understands. Though, maybe not all of it…”

“I know,” she sighs back, rubbing my shoulder. “It’s tough living a life like this, but we learn to make the best of it anyway. I’m sure you have with us in your world, Nova.”

I smile at this. Oh, trust me, mother, I definitely ha—

Whoa, wait! Did she really just call me that?

“‘Nova?’” I frown, completely astounded. “Why do you call me ‘Nova?’” Why did she just call me by her daughter’s name, even when I’m technically not her true daughter?

“You know why,” she says, smiling in the way that she always does. She then nods toward the TARDIS, “Come. Your father is waiting to hear your big story, even when he doesn’t seem to want to hear it, but he does.”

“Why do you call him my father?” I ask, feeling this situation to be getting weirder and weirder by the second.

“You know why,” she says again. Of course, she doesn’t say anything else. Instead, she just continues to smile at me in that cryptic way, like she knows something I don’t and won’t know until I am meant to. In other words, which are also her words, ‘spoilers.’ Typical.

Despite everything, I can’t help but frown at her, wondering how and why she seems to be starting to know who I really am, despite being from another world, even when I, myself, am not fully certain that I’m from another world. Then again, I’ve always known my mother to be a super-genius like my father, and not just because she was conceived in the Time Vortex. Despite everything, I feel happy that at least one person seems to believe me—that person being my mother. If only everybody else, especially my father, would believe me, then things would be so much better. Hopefully my story will change his mind.

Chapter Text

I quietly follow my mother into the TARDIS, a feeling of uneasiness growing in the pit of my stomach of how she and my father will react to my story. My worst fear at this point is that they’ll think of my story as an outrageous one rather than a rational one. I mean, who in their right mind would actually believe that the world we all live in is a simulated reality, exactly like in The Matrix film series? The more I think about it, the more nervous I feel about sharing this theory, especially knowing that the Doctor and River Song are not the types of people that would believe in that sort of thing. Even still, it can’t hurt to at least try, right?

“Well?” my father says in a seemingly irritated tone from the elevated platform, interrupting my thoughts. “Aren’t you going to say it?”

“Say what?” I frown at him, puzzled as to what he’s talking about. That you’re being a major asshole right now? I add in my head, beginning to feel a bit irked by his rude behavior since we met. I know he’s upset about losing his daughter, but that doesn’t mean he should be a dick and take his anger out on everyone else. It’s just not like him.

“That it’s bigger on the inside?” he confirms in a tone like it should be obvious, gesturing around the inconceivable vastness of the Control Room. “Everyone usually says that right about now.”

“Do I have to say it?” I scoff, not appreciating this feeling of being entitled to everything he says, especially when I am already well used to the TARDIS’s vast interior. “I already said I was familiar with the TARDIS. I don’t see any point in pretending otherwise.”

“No, of course not,” he huffs, sarcasm dripping off of his tongue. “Seeing as you already know so much about me, I should’ve known you’d know just as much about my TARDIS as well. How stupid of me.”

“Doctor,” River says pointedly, also clearly disapproving of her husband’s rude behavior toward me. However, he pays her no mind as he sighs again and goes back to his sulking at the console, carelessly flipping dials and switches as he does so.

I glance back at her, giving her a ‘what the freak is his problem?’ look (despite already knowing the answer to that question), and she responds by giving her own sigh and saying while laying an apologetic hand on my shoulder, “I’m sorry. He’s usually not like this.”

“I know,” I nod. “Believe me, I know.” From my experiences with my real father, he rarely acts like this, and even when he does, it doesn’t last very long, at least until we call him out on it. However, one thing that makes this Doctor different from my Doctor is that this Doctor isn’t at all fazed by our calling him out on his bullshit, no matter what we do, which makes me both sad and angry.

“Ever since our daughter…” River starts, but then she pauses, seeing her husband seemingly shudder at the word. “Things have been hard, especially for him. He doesn’t like talking about it, but…” She sighs again, seeming to fight back tears.

“What happened?” I ask again, this time to River, whispering it so as for her husband not to hear.

However, he ends up hearing me anyway as he snaps at me before his wife has a chance to speak, “I failed! That’s what happened. I failed to arrive on time to save her, and…” He pauses again and lifts up a fist, seemingly ready to bring it down hard on one of the control panels, but he stops himself at the last second, bringing his hand up to his face to rub at his eyes instead. “And now she’s gone.”

“B-But…” I hesitantly begin saying in another attempt to change his mind, “surely she can still be sa—”

“NO!” the Doctor exclaims, this time legitimately slapping the console hard, sending a couple of sparks flying (Damn! Poor Idris…). “She can’t! She can never be saved! As I said before, she’s been with them for too long! There is no saving her now! It’s impossible!”

“Doctor!” River chastises him again for his belligerence.

“River, how many times must I tell you?” he argues, his anger and frustration rising. “Nothing and no one can save our daughter! Not ever! When will you learn to accept that?”

“Excuse me,” she groans to me before she says in an insistent tone toward her husband as she storms towards him, “Sweetie, may I have a word with you in private? Now?” Refusing to give him a choice, she grabs him by the wrist and pulls him into a side hallway down the stairs from the elevated platform, much like a mother would to her misbehaving child before punishing him. I awkwardly follow but pause at the side of the console, partially curious as to what they will talk about. Hopefully she’ll whoop his ass while they’re at it, I think with a huff. He seriously needs to lighten up. This behavior is absolutely ridiculous!

As expected, River gives her punishment to her husband (not a child, though he’s definitely acting like one) in the form of a hard slap to his face, which sends him stumbling back a few steps. This all happens from around the corner, but I am still able to see their shadows along the wall behind the archway leading into the hallway.

“Oi!” my father yells disapprovingly, rubbing his cheek. “What was that for?!”

“Wake the hell up, Doctor!” River screams angrily at him. “Can’t you see you’re being rude to that poor girl?”

“River, we don’t even know who ‘that poor girl’ is! For all we know, you’ve just let one of them into the TARDIS! Why would you do that?”

“Okay, first of all, I didn’t invite her in; you did! Second of all, she’s not one of them!”

“How do you know?”

River pauses at the question, seemingly lost for words, though I can’t tell if it’s from her husband’s outrageousness or that she genuinely doesn’t know how to respond to the question. “I…”

“How could you possibly know she’s not one of them, River?” the Doctor continues like she hadn’t said anything at all (and technically she didn’t). “How does she know so much about us? Where do you think she’s gotten all that information, eh? There is only one place she could’ve gotten that information from, and that’s from them! She couldn’t have gotten all of that from anyone else!”

“Doctor, please, listen to me!” River begins protesting again, seemingly finding her voice again. “I really think she can help us!”

“To what, send us to our graves?” he scoffs at her. “That’s all the Silence have ever done! That’s all she’s ever done!” At this, I can’t decide if he’s talking about me or about Nova—his Nova, the one who turned to the Dark Side, much like Anakin Skywalker when he became Darth Vader. “When will you ever learn, River? She can’t be saved!”

“If you’ll just give her a chance—” River tries once more, but her husband interrupts her yet again.

“No! I can’t trust anybody else! No one but you! I’ve tried everything! I am done trying! It’s over, River! Our daughter is gone! She’s never coming back! No one can save her, certainly not that girl! She needs to go!”

His words hit me in the chest, piercing right through my single heart like a knife and bringing a flood of tears to my eyes. I can’t believe my own father would say something like that! He’s never said anything like that to me; ever…until now. Then again, these versions of my parents aren’t my true parents—at least I don’t think they are—so it would make sense for them not to love me. As my father—no, the Doctor—said, he doesn’t know me, hence why he doesn’t trust me.

This brings me back to the time in my other life when I ended up treating him in the exact same way as he is treating me right now. Back then, I was angry that he had given me up, and I never knew why until much later, but even then I didn’t trust him and accept him as my true father. Here, my father seems to be treating me similarly, refusing to trust me because he thinks I’m secretly working for the Silence, even though I’m not, but he refuses to give me a chance to prove myself and accept I’m not with them, much like how I refused to accept him as my father in my other life.

Feeling extreme guilt suddenly wash over me, I turn on my heel and begin rushing to the exit.

They must’ve heard me leaving, because I suddenly hear River’s voice call out to me, “Young lady, where are you going?”

“Clearly you refuse to trust me and accept my help,” I yell angrily back at them without turning around, “so I’m leaving!” At this point, I have reached the door and have my hand on the latch that keeps the door closed, prepared to leave them behind (again) forever.

“Wait!” River says, rushing after me, her husband reluctantly following close behind. “Don’t go! Please, listen to me! I’m sorry we offended you! We didn’t mean to!”

“You sure about that?” I say, doubting her words, as I turn back to them, glaring at them disdainfully. “Because, it sounded like you did! He certainly did!”

“No, I didn’t!” he protests in a pathetic attempt to act innocent, which ultimately fails. “Well, I kinda did—ow!” He winces when River elbows him hard in the chest.

“Doctor, shut up! You’re not helping!” she snaps at him before saying calmly to me, “Please, stay! We really do want your help. You clearly know much about us and our daughter, and I really think you could use that information to help us get our daughter back. I know you have a big story you want to share with us, and we really would like to hear it, especially if it will also help you return to your world.”

“‘Return to your world?’” the Doctor frowns at me, puzzled.

“Will you stop being a douchebag and let me explain?” I sigh, having enough of his bullshit.

“Oi, language!” he says, offended by my vulgar word choice, but I don’t care.

“I’m serious!” I snap back. “I get you’re upset you lost your daughter to your enemies, and I’m sorry about that, but you can’t just automatically assume everyone is a Silence member, just because they know so much about you. If you give me a chance to explain, that’ll prove I’m not with them. Honestly, I just want to go home, and I feel like this is the only way back.”

“If you want to go home, I can give you a lift right here,” the Doctor points out, gesturing to the main console.

I shake my head. “I don’t mean back to my house. I mean back to my universe.” Back to my other life, I add in my head. My proper life…with my proper parents who are very clearly not you guys.

“You’re from another universe?” the Doctor frowns again, seeming genuinely curious this time. That, or maybe he’s just thrilled to send me back to another universe so he doesn’t have to ever deal with me anymore, and, as much as I hate to admit it, I partially agree. My Doctor is so much friendlier than this Doctor. My Doctor would never shun me, no matter what faults I make.

I groan. “I promise, I’ll explain everything, if you’ll just let me!” Ugh, seriously, why does this Doctor have to make things so difficult for me?!

“Doctor, let her explain,” River agrees, seemingly sensing my frustration. “You’ll see she’s on our side.”

However, he ignores us as he flips several switches on the console, and I recognize the switches as the ones used to scan a person on board to find out said person’s secrets and origins. Noticing this, I can’t help but think, Wow, is he really doing this right now? Does he really not trust me that much? Unbelievable!

“Doctor!” River chastises him once again as she also catches on to what he’s doing.

“According to the TARDIS scanner,” he confirms while continuing to ignore us, “you’re not from another universe at all. You are actually from this one.”

I frown at this. “What? I’m not from another universe?” Okay, that’s surprising, I think to myself. Guess I can check that off the list then. “It must be a sim then,” I admit my remaining theory out loud, feeling doubtful that the TARDIS would detect that about me, especially since I’m pretty sure the TARDIS is part of the sim.

“‘Sim?’” River frowns, as does the Doctor, seemingly puzzled at the word.

“Simulation,” I confirm in an annoyed tone. “Have none of you ever seen The Matrix?” Honestly, you people need to get into more Earth pop-culture, I grunt in my head. It’s embarrassing!

“The film series starring Keanu Reeves, or the supercomputer on Gallifrey?” River asks to clarify. At least my mother is familiar with some pop-culture; unlike the Doctor, who still appears confused.

“The Keanu Reeves movie series,” I reply. “Not familiar with the other one…though maybe I am. I am supposed to be Time Lord, after all.” In all honesty, I’ve only heard of the Sci-Fi movie series; my Doctor never mentioned there being a real Matrix outside of television.

“You’re a Time Lord?” the Doctor asks, genuinely shocked. Then again, of course he would be, especially after all the years he’s believed himself to be the last Time Lord in the entire universe, at least until River came along.

Though, at the same time, I can’t help but think, Oh, so now you’ll start trusting me, only because I’ve finally admitted to being one of your own kind? Yeah, I see how it is.

“I used to be,” I correct him. “I’m supposed to be. Like I tried to tell you before, something must’ve happened to me when I got ‘zapped’ into this world. It must’ve changed my identity somehow. And species, apparently.”

“What do you mean?” River asks, puzzled.

“Who are you?” her husband asks with equal puzzlement.

I sigh as I hesitantly approach them. “I think you guys should sit down for this. It’s super complicated and may shock you.” They glance at each other with uncertainty at this before they do what I say, sitting together on the side stairs where they had me usually sit in my other life when we had serious family meetings. I rejoin them at the console as they sit.

“Okay,” the Doctor shrugs once they are settled, “we’re sitting like you asked. Why don’t you start off by telling us who you are. Who you really are.” They wrap their arms around each other in preparation to comfort the other, depending on how they react to what I tell them.

I sigh. “I’ll get to that. But first, I want to say I’m sorry if I creeped you guys out back at the arcade when I listed all of those personal things about you guys. Honestly, that was the only way I could think of to get you guys to trust me, but clearly that wasn’t the way to go about it at all, and I apologize for that. So now I’m gonna introduce myself properly.” I sigh again before admitting, “In this world, my name is Sydney Marie Elise. But in my world…” I pause once more, suddenly losing confidence in myself, but I eventually shake my head and admit anyway, “I’m your daughter, Nova Susan Song.”

The room suddenly goes quiet; even the TARDIS’s soft hum seems to have temporarily ceased. My parents just stare, wide-eyed, at me, seeming in total disbelief and at a complete loss for words.

“Yeah,” I say, breaking the uncomfortable silence, “I know what you guys are thinking, but it’s true. How else would I know so much about you guys?”

“How are you our daughter?” the Doctor finally speaks up, but it is not at all what I expected him to say. “You don’t look anything like us!”

A pang of hurt stabs me through my heart again, but I ignore it as I continue. “I know I don’t, but I’m supposed to. Like I said, when I was ‘zapped’ here, my DNA and timeline got rewritten somehow; I don’t know how. At least I am still able to retain all of my old memories, which I also don’t know how; though I don’t remember anything from before I woke up this morning. That’s what I’m hoping to figure out with you guys’ help, and in return I help you save your daughter in this world. I’m pretty sure your Nova is the same as me…or should be if it weren’t for the Silence. If I connect with her, maybe I can coax her into going back to who she was supposed to be. Should be easy enough, right, since I know her. Duh, since she’s basically me; well, Evil Me. But that’s the thing; it wasn’t supposed to happen that way. In my world, you saved me from the Silence and then gave me up to another family to be kept hidden until I was much older. That was what was supposed to happen.”

“That’s exactly what we tried to do!” the Doctor says before sighing sadly. “But we couldn’t find anyone willing to adopt, so we tried raising her ourselves. They ended up finding her anyway.”

“For sixteen years, we’ve been trying to get her back,” River explains as she tries to soothe her grieving husband, massaging the back of his neck. “We nearly risked our lives trying to save her last time…but it was too late. It turns out she is now the new leader of the Silence. She claimed to have killed Madame Kovarian in cold blood, and now our daughter leads the Silence now.”

“Oh my god…” I gasp in shock. So the Sontaran wasn’t lying. She really has turned to the Dark Side.

“And because of that,” the Doctor adds through hot tears, “she can’t be saved. That’s what I keep telling you two. I’m not going to continue risking my life trying to save someone who is now beyond saving.”

I shake my head in disagreement. “See, I don’t believe that, and I know, deep down, that you don’t believe that.” At this, my father looks up at me in seeming offence, but I continue anyway, “Clearly you have forgotten your promise: ‘Never cruel or cowardly. Never give up. Never give in.’ From what you just said about refusing to try again, you’ve just admitted to giving up, which goes against your promise.” As I say this, I see River subtly nodding and smiling in confirmation. “River knows it too,” I say, glancing toward her and smiling lightly back at her in thanks.

“I’m not giving up!” the Doctor says in an insistent tone, but I know (and River knows) he’s lying. Rule One: The Doctor lies.

“But you are,” I say, not accepting his lie by a longshot. I pause for a few seconds before I sigh and admit as I step up to him and kneel down in front of him while placing a soothing hand on his knee, “I know you, Dad. This isn’t like you. You’re lying to yourself. You don’t run and cower from fear. You rise from it; stare it in the face and show it who’s boss.” I pause again, suddenly remembering the entire ‘fear’ speech he shared with me in my other world, and I decide to recite a part of it to him, reminding him of his promise many, many years ago, “As a wise, old man once taught me, fear doesn’t make you cruel or cowardly. Fear makes you kind. You’re always going to be afraid, even if you learn to hide it, like you are now. To you—the real you—fear is a superpower. Fear is a companion; a constant companion. Fear makes companions of all of us.” If these words won’t get him to finally trust me, I don’t know what will.

The Doctor is speechless for several seconds, seeming in denial of everything I told him and of himself, so I decide to take it a step further, this time placing a hand on his cheek, forcing him to focus on me. “Dad…” I whisper. “I know you think you’ve failed me—Nova—but it’s not the end of the world. We can fix this. I know your daughter, who she’s supposed to be. I can use that to talk to her, connect with her. Deep down, I know she loves you, both of you. I bet if she got to know the real you, she’d love you in a heartbeat—or two. We just need to show her… Together.”

At this, the Doctor shakes his head, pulling my hand away from his cheek and saying, “Sydney… You don’t understand. I’ve tried so many times. I can’t do it anymore. I’m tired. I’m tired of running from her. I just want to stop.”

I nod. “Okay, so stop. Let her find you. Then you can talk to her. Show her the real you. Show her who ‘The Doctor’ really is.” How is he supposed to reconnect with his daughter if he just keeps running from her? Why can’t he just give her a chance to change her ways?

“No, you don’t understand,” River pipes up, seemingly agreeing with her husband this time, which shocks me. “She has a strong telepathic link with us, which she uses to find us. If we stop even for a moment, she finds us, and she stops at nothing to kill us. She has absolutely no interest in talking to us, only killing us, just as the Silence have always done. That’s why we have to keep running.”

“That’s my point, River,” the Doctor says, turning to her. “We can’t just keep running for the rest of our lives. Eventually we’ll have to stop.”

I frown at this. Are they seriously giving up? Seriously?! “And then what, you’re just going to let her kill you without even trying to do anything else?” I say incredulously. “I don’t believe that for one second. I know you guys better than that. You’re my parents. My parents never give up. We never give up! We can put this right!”

“NO!” the Doctor suddenly snaps, reverting back to his bitter persona. “I’m not your dad! I don’t even know you! I’m through discussing this! You just don’t understand! You’ll never understand!” He then says as he immediately gets up, pushes past me, and begins operating the console, “I’m going to take care of the Sontaran, and then I’m taking you home!”

“Sweetie—” River begins protesting, but her husband doesn’t want to hear it.

“Enough, River!” he snaps at her. “Just help me with this!”

I fight myself not to cry as I helplessly watch my father—rather, the shell of my father—physically and emotionally break down at the console. It’s like he’s become an entirely different person, despite looking the exact same as I am used to seeing him. This is not the kind of Regeneration I wanted to see happen to him. Normally I’m used to the physical body-changes but never emotional ones. I feel as if I don’t even know who he is anymore. He’s not ‘the Doctor’ I know anymore. He’s not my father anymore; that, he is one-hundred percent right about, and it breaks my heart.

After a few minutes of watching him, River sighs again, saying, “I am so sorry, Sydney. As I said before, he’s usually not like this.”

“I get it,” I nod. “Maybe I should leave anyway.” At this, River turns to me to protest, but I stop her, explaining, “I mean, you guys clearly have some major marital problems that need sorting out, and it’s not my business to be any part of it. That being said, I should leave so you guys can sort this out on your own, and then come find me when you’re done…that is, if you still want my help.”

It is now crystal-clear that I don’t belong here, not just in the TARDIS but in this world, but I can’t do anything about it; not until both River and the Doctor agree to help me get back to my proper world, and I can’t do that with their personal problems getting in the way. I’m no Marriage Counselor, but I can tell that their daughter’s fate has taken a major toll on their overall marriage, and it needs to be taken care of before any other problems can be sorted.

“No, I do,” River says, shaking her head. “I really do want your help. It’s just… Without our daughter… It’s been really hard for both of us, as you are now well aware.” She pauses and sighs as she watches her husband seemingly struggle to drag the Sontaran’s body from under its arms toward the door to throw him out, though he doesn’t ask her to help him, despite asking for her help before but not really meaning it. “But you’re right. This behavior is very unhealthy for both of us…especially for him. This is the sort of thing that happens when he travels alone for too long. He lets his guilt and anger control him, and it changes him into someone he’s not. It breaks my hearts to see him like this. He's been like this for far too long, ever since we lost her…” She chokes on her words as tears begin slipping down her cheeks, and I instantly feel the need to wrap my arms around her, but I refrain from doing so.

“Right!” the Doctor speaks up as he wipes his hands on his trousers after disposing of the Sontaran’s body into Space. “Now, time to take you home!” He automatically sets the TARDIS to fly again.

“Uh…don’t you need my address?” I ask hesitantly, paranoid that he might snap at me again, but thankfully he doesn’t.

“No need,” he says, shaking his head as he flies. “The TARDIS gave me all the information I needed when she scanned you, including your home address. We should be arriving shortly, and then I want you out. Be ready.”

‘I want you out.’ Literally the most hurtful words I have ever heard my father say, especially to me.

I sigh sadly, fighting myself not to cry even more as I begin walking toward the door, prepared to exit the second the TARDIS lands. At this point, I truly feel like I am being shunned by my own parents, even though I did absolutely nothing wrong. It makes me both sad and angry to see them fall apart like this, and, yet again, the Silence are the ones at fault, as they always are and forever will be.

The instant the TARDIS lands, I step outside to see my house, the TARDIS having parked right on top of our driveway beside my car. River accompanies me, stepping out but still keeping the door slightly open. “So…should we exchange phone numbers, or…” I ask her awkwardly. Then again, I’m not even sure she actually uses phones, since I’ve never seen her use one.

“No need,” she shakes her head. “I’ll come and find you when you’re not busy.”

“Listen, River,” I say, a wave of guilt suddenly flooding through my heart, “I’m really sorry for what’s happened. For everything I said about you at the arcade…”

“Stop!” she shakes her head again before wrapping me up in a tight hug, which surprises me. “You didn’t do anything wrong. You are absolutely right. The Doctor and I have been struggling for a very long time, and we need to sit and sort all of this out before we do anything else. We need a serious break. It’s nothing personal. We’ll come back for you later; or if he won’t then I certainly will. I promise.”

“I’ll keep my eyes and ears open for you guys,” I say with a nod, pulling away. “In the meantime…I’ll just be here, I guess.”

“Take care of yourself, sweetie,” River says apologetically as she steps back into the safety of the TARDIS.

“You too,” I say, smiling at her old nickname for me as well as her husband. “And him.”

“I will,” she promises. “I’ll talk to him. Bye for now.”

“Bye,” I wave sadly back as she reenters the TARDIS, closing the door behind her. I step back and watch as the blue box dematerializes right in front of me, transitioning back into the Time Vortex, back into the unknown. A large tear runs down my cheek as the last bit of the time-machine’s wheezing noise fades into silence.

“Sydney?” I suddenly hear my mother—rather, my mother-guardian—call to me from the entry door of the house. “Is that you? What was that noise?”

I hastily wipe my eyes dry before replying with a shrug, “Uh…that must’ve been someone’s lawn mower.” Of course, that was a total lie, as there would be absolutely no way she’d ever believe me if I told her that it was actually a time-machine disguised as a blue telephone box from Outer Space.

“I don’t see anyone mowing,” she says, looking up and down the now empty street.

“They…must’ve gone back inside,” I shrug, continuing with the lie, as I enter the house.

Once she closes the door, she automatically wraps her arms around me, saying in a worried tone, “Are you alright? I saw what happened at the arcade on the News earlier. Hazel’s mom said you girls were there when it happened. Also, I don’t know if she told you, but Hazel is in the hospital. She’s fine, but her mom said she ended up in a car crash while driving home after being shot in the arm by whatever attacked the place. Hazel told her the pain in her arm overwhelmed her, and she ended up losing control of her car and drove into a telephone pole. Weren’t you with Hazel when the accident happened?”

Knowing that there’s no way I can lie myself out of this, I just shrug, saying, “No. I was…with someone else.”

“Who?” she asks what I greatly feared she would ask.

Thankfully the perfect lie comes to mind in that very moment. “Another friend from school we ran into when we first arrived. He offered me a ride home when everything else happened.” Seems like something she would genuinely believe, right?

“So you abandoned Hazel?” she says in an appalled tone.

I frown at her for coming up with such a ridiculous notion. “No! She…” I instantly pause, not wanting to talk about our falling-out, so I make up another believable lie instead. “When the attacker arrived and starting shooting people, we ran in fear, but we got separated. I went with my other friend, but Hazel separated from us. I saw she had driven off without me, probably coz she was so panicked and didn’t think, so I asked my other friend to give me a lift home instead.”

“Was that the strange noise I heard?” Mom asks in a slightly suspicious tone. “Your friend driving off?”

“Yeah,” I nod, hoping that would be the end of it. However, she insists on knowing more, seemingly not believing my story, which is what I was afraid of.

“I thought you said it was a lawn mower,” she says, clearly trying to make sense of my (fake) story.

Thankfully, another perfect lie comes to mind. “Uh…my friend’s car engine sounds like a lawn mower sometimes,” I say with a shrug, trying to sound as honest as possible. “I said the wrong thing before; I meant to say that was my friend’s car and not an actual lawn mower.”

Mom just stares at me, still not totally believing me, so I just shake my head.

“The bottom line is, Mom, I’m home now. You don’t have to worry about me anymore. Look at me; no cuts, no bruises, nothing. I’m fine. Seriously. Can I go to my room now?”

“Aren’t you worried about Hazel?” she says in a tone like I’d be a horrible friend if I wasn’t worried. “You should visit her.”

Of course I’m worried for my best friend, I think to myself. How can I not be, no matter how upset I still am about her (as well as the Doctor’s) behavior toward me?

“I’ll visit her tomorrow,” I say with a sigh as I begin making my way upstairs to my room. “Right now, I just want to rest. It’s been a crazy morning.”

Nonetheless, Mom still seems genuinely worried for me. “Okay, sweetie. I just want to know you’re safe, that’s all.”

“I know, Mom,” I nod, forcing myself to smile. “I’m fine, really. I just need some time to myself.”

“Okay,” Mom sighs back, still seeming reluctant to let me go. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” I say as I rush upstairs to my room and shut the door behind me.

Once my door is closed, I immediately collapse on my bed and cry, failing to fight back all of the memories that happened over the last few hours. I feel immense anger at the fact that I not only lost my best friend, but I was also kicked out of my true parents’ lives on the same day. I can’t believe my best friend would run out on me like that without first giving me a chance to even try to believe me, and neither did my parents, particularly the Doctor. I feel especially upset that the Doctor refuses to accept my help, only thinking of his corrupt daughter and his hopelessness to save her. At least River seems willing to accept my help, having promised to come back for me once she sorts out their marriage, but now it seems like the odds of that happening are slim to none. That being said, I fear that I’ll be stuck in this false reality for the rest of my life, never being able to go home to my true parents ever again.

“Please!” I beg to whoever placed me in this twisted world. “I don’t know what to do! I don’t want this life! I want my other life back! I want my real parents back! Please, help me! Help me…”

I continue sobbing to myself, eventually sobbing myself to sleep, dreaming of another life that I will never have. A life that I will never get back.

Chapter Text

“Wake up… Come on, Nova, you can do it. Wake up. WAKE UP!”

“Dad!” I gasp upon hearing the Doctor’s voice as I immediately sit up from my bed. I look around the dimly lit bedroom only to discover that I am completely alone, my bow tie-wearing father nowhere to be seen. I sigh sadly, thinking I’ve simply dreamt hearing his voice, or that I’ve imagined hearing it.

Rubbing my bleary eyes, I lay back in bed, thinking back on what I’d just seen in my dream. As I heard my father’s voice whispering for me to “wake up,” I remember seeing his dark silhouette looming over me with his hands on my temples exactly like he always did when he connected with people telepathically. I also remember the room looking a bit like a creepy basement rather than a comfortable bedroom, with a bright light directly above me. There was even a wire that seemed to be connected to one side of my forehead that was connected to a strange device, like something you’d typically find in a hospital, but it was too dark and blurry to make out any major details. Other than those few things, that’s all I can remember.

I immediately begin trying to make sense of my strange dream. From the fact that my father seemed to be getting me to wake up, only for me to seemingly slip back under whatever affects the mechanical device that I was wired to had on me, this seemed like further proof that I am truly stuck in a Matrix-like simulation. Perhaps the Doctor—my Doctor—was trying to save me from whatever trapped me in the sim to begin with, but he was clearly failing at it, seemingly unable to wake me himself. On that note, perhaps I have to wake myself up first in order to fully escape the sim, and I have to pass some sort of test in order to do so. The only problem with this is that—assuming passing a test is what I truly have to do to wake up from this twisted nightmare—I need the Doctor’s and River’s help to pass it, but they seem to refuse to help me and are, instead, too busy believing me to be a secret mole for the Silence. Despite this, I remember River promising to come back for me once they resolved their marriage, but I haven’t seen nor heard from her in several days. It makes me feel slightly worried for my former bio-parents’ safety, thinking that something life-threatening must’ve happened to them, but, as I’ve done countless times in the last four days, I mentally tell myself that there is actually nothing wrong and that their marriage-sorting is simply taking a little longer than expected. This sort of thing often happens with most couples in a strained relationship; perfectly normal, right?

Later that day, I decide (against my better judgement) to visit Hazel at the hospital. Several days prior, on the same day we were attacked by the Sontaran, I found out that Hazel ended up having to go through emergency surgery to have her arm amputated, since no normal human ailments could heal her arm since she was attacked by something extraterrestrial. The instant I found this out, I felt immensely guilty that I no longer had my Regeneration ability, as I could’ve used it to heal her arm without having it be amputated. This thought makes me wonder if things would’ve ended up the same way in my other life, had I been born human instead of Time Lord.

Because of the surgery, Hazel wasn’t allowed visitors (except for her parents) until she recovered from the surgery, and I waited anxiously until my mother told me she was finally allowed visitors outside the family today. I spent all morning calling and texting Hazel, but she hasn’t replied to any of my messages, and I can’t decide if she isn’t responding because of her condition or that she’s refusing to respond out of spite and anger, so I ultimately decide to go over to the hospital and see her in person so she’ll have no choice but to talk to me. Thinking back on our fight, the outcome was absolutely ridiculous, and I wanted it resolved so things can go back to normal between us. Needless to say, it is pointless to stay mad at her forever.

Once I arrive at the hospital, I ask the front desk for a Visitors Pass to see Hazel, and they arrange the rest as I sit in the Waiting Room. Eventually, they give me a Visitors Pass sticker to stick onto my shirt, and they give me directions to the room that Hazel is assigned to. Once this is done, I immediately get into the elevator and ascend to the specific floor where her room is located.

Once I reach the floor, I walk through the pristine hallways in search of Hazel’s room. At one point, I see a teenage girl walking toward me with her head down and the hood of her sweatshirt covering her face from the nose up. The first thing I notice about the girl as she approaches is her pointy chin that matches the Doctor’s chin identically. That’s no coincidence, is it? I immediately think to myself as the girl and I walk closer and closer to each other. Another strange thing I notice about the girl is that she is not wearing the required Visitors Pass anywhere on her clothing. Perhaps she’s wearing it under her sweatshirt, I wonder. Thinking about it, I find it also strange for the girl to be wearing a heavy sweatshirt in summer weather, but I don’t think much of it as I sidestep closer to the wall to give the girl extra room to pass. Plenty of people wear sweatshirts in hospitals, since they’re always so cold, no matter what the time of the year, I think to myself. Again, totally normal, righ—

I am interrupted mid-thought when the girl suddenly and deliberately slams her shoulder into mine, almost knocking me off-balance.

“Hey!” I scold her immediately. What’s her deal? I gave her plenty of room!

I turn to the girl, prepared to give her a piece of my mind, when she looks up at me just enough for me to see her full face, and I immediately pause in absolute shock.

It’s me!

Rather, it’s her! Nova! I’d recognize her face anywhere—the face I wore in my other life before I regenerated from River unintentionally stabbing me in my left heart—save for the sinister iDrive covering her right eye. She’s here, and she’s real!

As the girl passes, she smirks creepily at me before she continues walking in the opposite direction I came from and rounds a corner at the end of the hallway, emitting a bright blue flash shortly after. Once I wake up from the shock, I rush after the girl only to discover that she’s disappeared, which I find strange, as the hallway she’d turned down leads to a dead-end with a large window that drops approximately eighty feet to the ground. As I pace the area, I ponder to myself about how it was possible for the girl to disappear with nowhere to go, but then I remember hearing a familiar electrical sound the moment she slipped around the corner, and I felt the familiar tingling sensation in the air that is left behind when a Vortex Manipulator is used to ‘zap’ out of the area. At this point, I’m starting to wonder if the girl really was my alleged alternate evil self, and I didn’t just imagine her; admittedly, I have been thinking nonstop about her over the last few days, ever since the Doctor and River told me about her unfortunate fate.

“Are you lost, ma’am?” a woman’s voice interrupts me from my thoughts.

“What?” I turn, startled to see a mid-twenty-year-old nurse having entered from the adjacent hallway.

“Are you lost?” she repeats her previous question with a frown at my seemingly odd behavior.

“I…uh…” I struggle to find the right words, still at a loss as to what (rather, who) I saw literally vanish around the corner and whether it was real. Instead of confessing what I saw—I seriously doubt she’d believe me if I told her I’d just seen (or thought I saw) my evil twin teleport off into who-knows-where in Space-Time—I sigh and say instead, “I’m looking for Hazel McAdams; she’s a patient here. I’m a close friend of hers and am here to visit her. I was told she was on this floor.”

“Let’s see…” the nurse says as she flips through her clipboard. “Hazel McAdams… Yes, she’s right here. Her room is down this hallway.” She points behind her with her thumb, toward the hallway she just came from. “I can take you to her directly if you like.”

“Uh, yes please,” I nod, still a little unsure. “Thank you.”

Luckily, the nurse doesn’t ask questions as she escorts me to Hazel’s room. On the way, I feel more and more nervous about how the visitation will go. Hopefully Hazel won’t shout for Security once she lays eyes on me, thinking she’s still reluctant to face me after her unnecessary outburst in the arcade parking lot the other day.

Once we arrive at the room, I see Hazel laying in the hospital bed, her face looking badly cut and bruised from her accident on the way home after she abandoned me. I notice that one of her arms—the one that was amputated—is covered by her blanket, seeming like she’s refusing to look at it (Who can blame her?). She sits, talking with her mother, who is sitting calmly on the side of her bed. They both look abruptly up at me as I enter, seemingly not expecting me to visit at this time, or even at all.

“Sydney!” Hazel’s mom frowns upon seeing me, seeming like she’s disgusted to see me here with her daughter since it’s my fault that she’s in this mess in the first place.

I pause, feeling slightly awkward. “Sorry…is now a bad time?” I can already feel the tension in the room rising with my very presence.

Hazel’s mom shakes her head, saying, “No, I just…didn’t expect you to visit.” Meanwhile, Hazel remains quiet, not even acknowledging my presence, and I can’t help but internally roll my eyes at this.

“Of course I came to visit,” I say with a shrug and loud enough for Hazel in particular to hear. “That’s what friends do, after all; do they not?” No surprise, she still refuses to look at me, and I swear I hear a small snort from her. Touché, I think back with a frown.

Clearly feeling the tension in the room escalating between us, Hazel’s mom says in an awkward tone as she rises from her perch on the side of her daughter’s bed, “Well, I’m going to leave you girls alone then. I’ll just be outside. Good to see you’re alright as well, Sydney.”

“Thank you,” I nod to her as she walks past me and out of the room, giving us some privacy. Once she’s gone, I awkwardly enter the room and settle in one of the slightly uncomfortable lounge chairs provided for guests to use during visitations. We both remain silent for several minutes, the entire time Hazel refuses to make eye contact with me and instead stares out the window at the busy parking lot below.

Eventually, I can’t take the silence any longer. I speak up calmly, saying apologetically, “I heard what happened to your arm. I’m sorry to hear that. If I had the ability to heal you, I would’ve; then you wouldn’t have to be here.” Hazel, of course, remains quiet, but I continue talking anyway, keeping a calm composure despite my growing anger.

“Look,” I sigh in slight annoyance, “I get you’re still pissed at me from the attack, but I came here wanting to apologize. I know I was reckless and stupid for dragging you into all of that, and I’m sorry, I really am. If it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t be in this mess.” I sigh again, halfheartedly talking to myself this time, “That’s what happens when one associates themselves with my family. Call it ‘a family curse,’ I guess. It’s something I get from my dad. Well, my real dad…whom I may never see again now, nor my real mother. She promised she’d come back for me, but I haven’t heard from either of them in days. By now, I would’ve thought they’ve sorted out their marriage… But I guess that hasn’t happened yet, and perhaps it never will, after what’s happened to their daughter. After what’s happened to me…” At this point, I think about telling Hazel about my brief encounter with Nova in the hallway just minutes ago, but I ultimately decide against it, knowing how fed-up Hazel is of hearing all of my crazy, made-up stories. If only she knew how far from ‘made-up’ my stories actually are… Not that she cares about any of that anymore, and she probably never will.

At this point, Hazel’s silence is really starting to get on my nerves. I groan at her, feeling a sudden surge of anger flood my chest. “Please talk to me, Haze. It’s pointless to continue hating each other like this. If you’d just stuck around and given me a chance to prove myself, we wouldn’t be in this situation. You wouldn’t be in this situation! Everything I said about my dream is real! If you’d stuck around, you’d see I wasn’t crazy; you would’ve seen proof that everything is real! Rather than you being here, my dad could’ve healed you much more easily if you’d trusted him to heal you. If you’d trusted me!”

“Are you done?” Hazel snaps at me, finally turning to me, speaking for the first time since I arrived.

“What?” I frown back at her.

“Are you done talking so I can finally relieve myself of this constant earache?” she says in an annoyed tone before shaking her head and saying, “Actually, let me rephrase. Will you ever be done living in your freakazoid fantasy? This is exactly why I can’t hang out with you anymore! You’ve gone completely psychotic in the head!”

“Haze, I haven’t!” I insist. “Everything I’m saying is true! If you’d just listen to me! If you’d just give me a chance!”

“No!” she snaps at me again. “I said I was done! I’m surprised you’re not, but you really should be! As I said, I’m not hanging out with you again until you get the help you clearly need!”

“Actually I do need help,” I decide to point out, “but it’s not the kind of help you’re thinking.” Clearly she thinks I’ve finally cracked and should be sent to an insane asylum, which doesn’t surprise me one bit. Of course, anyone who’s part of a simulated reality would think that about anyone who’s not part of a simulated reality.

“Let me guess,” she says in a condescending tone, “you took the blue pill by mistake, when you really should’ve taken the red pill; so now you’re stuck in Wonderland seemingly indefinitely, not knowing how to climb back out of the ‘rabbit hole’ to return to the real world.”

I pause, thinking of a better way to explain my situation, but I ultimately end up failing, so I sigh and say in defeat, “Actually, that’s pretty accurate.”

Hazel groans this time. “Oh my god, Syd, you are so pigheaded! I was being sarcastic! It’s a movie series! It’s Science Fiction! It’s not real!”

At this point, I have had enough of her. There is clearly no other way to convince her that my stories are true, so there is absolutely no point in continuing to try further. “Of course you’d think that!” I sigh, my anger reaching its peak. “Anyone who’s part of a simulated reality would think that! That’s how sims are programmed! In which case, there’s no point in continuing to talk to you about this! You wouldn’t understand anyway, coz you’re part of the sim!”

“Then maybe you should leave and never come back!” she snaps at me.

“Maybe I should!” I snap back. “This isn’t my world anyway! You’re not my Hazel! My Hazel would believe me, but you never will!”

“Fine!” she shrugs, seemingly preferring that I disappear from this world so she doesn’t have to deal with me ever again. In all honesty, I feel the same way about her now.

“Fine!” I retaliate for the final time before I stomp out of the room, pushing past Hazel’s mom and ignoring her protests as I leave the hospital.

Once I reach my car in the parking lot, I immediately rip off my Visitors Pass sticker, crumple it in my fist and throw it across the lot out of anger. Before I get into my car, I take out my phone, planning to delete anything and everything that connects with Hazel (photos, phone number, etc.). Once I take out my phone, I see something else fall out of the same pocket. I pick it up and discover it to be a small piece of paper that had been sneakily slipped into my pocket at some point on the way to or during the visitation. Curiously, I unfold the paper and see latitude and longitude coordinates written on it, as well as a small note that says “Come after dark and come alone.” Instantly feeling like I recognize the coordinates, I plug them into my GPS app on my phone, and I recognize the location as the abandoned factory that is within biking distance from my house where teens from my school often visit for urban exploration, ghost hunts, or for other underage and illegal purposes.

However, there is one major detail about the note that I find the most disturbing:

The handwriting is mine. Rather, it’s Nova’s.

Chapter Text

Thankfully, later that day, I find out my parents are going out to a concert out of town and would be staying out overnight, which makes it easier for me to sneak out of the house without questions. Regrettably, this made me think back to my other life, at the time when they went off to see a concert at the exact same time I was planning to leave them after I found out the truth of my so-called ‘non-humanness,’ and how that was the very last time I saw them alive together. The next time I reunited with them, I found out my father-guardian had been brutally killed by the Silence, which I saw in a vision, and thankfully my mother-guardian and Hazel were kept alive, but later my mother-guardian sacrificed herself to save the rest of my family, staying behind and buying us extra time to escape the Silence, and neither of us were able to save her after that.

When I found out they were leaving again today, a large part of me wanted to stop them and convince them to stay so I could spend more time with them; but at the same time I knew they weren’t real, that they were part of the simulation that I believe myself to be stuck in, and it just wouldn’t feel the same as being with them in my other life. Perhaps I would’ve been able to save their lives this time by forcing them to stay, but, sadly, I allowed them to go to the concert without me, knowing that, deep down, it was time for me to let them go; even in my other life, I’m sure they would’ve asked me to do the same, no matter how much they knew of their tragic fate. As hard as it was to say goodbye to them for the final time, I knew I had a responsibility to follow, and it was important that I follow it regardless; it’s what they would want for me, even long after their passing.

‘Be strong, be brave…’ my father-guardian’s words echo in my mind, ‘but further most, be smart. Your strengths and your knowledge are what make you invincible. You can do anything, so long as you follow those three rules.’ Words that I swear to myself that I will never forget, even several Regenerations down the line.

The moment the sun disappears below the horizon, I hop on my bike and cycle over to the abandoned factory where the ominous note from my apparent evil twin instructed me to meet.

Before my meeting, I spent the remainder of the day making sure I would be as well prepared as possible. I have absolutely no idea what will happen once I get there, and I want to make absolutely sure I’m well prepared for literally anything that may be thrown at me. There’s a high chance that I might be facing the Silence again, and if what the Doctor and River said about ‘their Nova’ being their new leader is true, I should never underestimate her, no matter what she may do to me. With this in mind, I know that this version of me is very different—not at all like me—and, therefore, very dangerous, so it will be a challenge to face her. No doubt some sort of trap will be waiting for me once I arrive.

As I continue cycling quietly over to the factory (it feels so surreal that I know how to ride a bike at all, as I never learned to ride one in my other life), I think about what sort of trap that Nova has set for me. There is no doubt that the Silence want something from me, specifically my knowledge of the Doctor and River, and they want to use everything I know about them to destroy them for her, exactly like the Silence always wanted from the very start. I’m betting that the ‘trap’ will be their way to put me under mind-control and manipulate me into turning onto their side and helping them to accomplish this goal once and for all, and I spent most of the day and bike-ride planning ways to prevent them from doing this and to escape them if worse came to worse. I highly doubt that simply resisting them would work, since in my other life, River Song attempted to do this, only the Silence overpowered her and put her under their control anyway, and I remember how much of a struggle it was for the Doctor and I to break her free from the mind-control and how it ultimately cost me my life and forced me to regenerate once we did finally break her free. However, in this world, I no longer have that Regeneration ability to save me this time (God, I really wish I did!), so I plan not to take any chances. This world is unlike any typical ‘dream’ I’ve ever experienced before, so if I end up dying here, there’s a chance I may not wake up in reality, and I will make doubly sure that this doesn’t happen…just in case.

As I pull up to the factory’s property and park my bike at the entrance, I feel a small part of me begin to wish that I had brought Hazel with me as backup, but I instantly remember that she is still in the hospital and our friendship is now very strained from our earlier falling-out. In my former life, I know that that version of Hazel would’ve gone with me no question, keeping our oath in mind: ‘If you go down, I go down with you.’ However, this world is different. In this world, if such an oath existed, it no longer exists now and probably never will again. As sad as this is to me, it doesn’t matter anymore, as what matters most is getting home, back to my reality.

If worse does, indeed, come to worse, I hope that my former parents, the Doctor and River Song, show up in time to save me; though, at the same time, I fear this may be a longshot, as I haven’t heard from either of them in weeks, even though River promised me that they would. I’m fairly certain that they are the only people that can help me return home, but I don’t know how else to get home if they continue refusing to help me. If all of this is truly a test, I am also very certain that bringing the Doctor’s family back together (of course, without them killing each other) is the ‘test’ I have to pass in order to return home to mine.

“Damn…” I breathe out nervously as I enter the building and shine my flashlight around the dark interior, seeing terrifying shadows and hearing strange noises all around me. “Now I understand why people at school believe this place is haunted. This place is creeptastic.” I ignore the creepy feelings as I press on, looking for evidence of the exact meeting place in the building while being cautious of my stepping around various piles of debris and flimsy flooring.

As much as I want to avoid all these dark corridors and leave, I decide to follow the noises anyway, believing they will lead me to the meeting place. Plus, I get the feeling that leaving isn’t an option, as I believe that whoever sent that note will either force me back here or meet me back at my house, assuming the person knows where I live; in other words, I have absolutely no choice but to talk to him (or ‘her,’ or ‘them’) anyway.

May as well get it over with, I think dismally to myself with a sigh, here’s hoping I don’t die afterwards.

I continue wandering through the creepy corridors until the strangest thing happens. In what seems like the blink of an eye, one second I’m entering a dark room where there is lots of shuffling noises and shadows, and the next I’m high-tailing it out of the building and back to my bike with my single heart pounding in my throat. I momentarily pause, trying to remember what the hell happened in there, but I am completely unable to remember anything that led to me running for my life. In any case, there must be a logical reason, but since I can’t remember the reason at all, I ultimately decide to trust my gut and cycle away from that hellish place and go back home. As I begin cycling away, I see various shadowy figures looking at me through the shattered windows and opened doorways and watching me leave, but they don’t chase me, which I find strange, as I’m fairly certain that those ‘things’ had attempted to cause me harm, which led to me escaping to begin with. No matter the circumstances, I don’t think about it further as I cycle at high speed back home, refusing to look back.

At one point while cycling home, I check the time on my watch, and I see that it is 9:57pm, which is about twenty minutes later than when I first arrived at the factory. That meant I was inside that factory, talking to who-knows-who about who-knows-what, for just as long.

My legs are burning by the time I finally reach my house. I immediately park my bike in the garage and rush all around the house, closing and locking all doors and windows. I even close all of the curtains for good measure, in case the people I supposedly met at the factory had followed me home. I peek through the curtains and stare out the front windows for several minutes to see if anyone is walking around the neighborhood as if to search for me, but thankfully I see no one. I eventually return to the sofa in the Living Room with the longest, sharpest knife from the holder in the kitchen for extra protection.

I sit there, gripping the knife tightly in hand, while struggling to think back on what happened at that factory. For the life of me, I can’t remember anything that happened between entering the building and leaving it. What, or who, was it inside that made me rush away in such a panic? Did I really just run away from a ghost? Or was that really the Silence I encountered in there? If the Silence were truly there, I feel like that would explain why I don’t remember anything at all. I vaguely remember having a conversation with someone, but I can’t remember who I talked with nor what we talked about. The Silence must’ve attempted to force me to do their dirty work, and I refused and immediately left, but even then, I wonder why they didn’t chase me and instead just watched me run. Did they suddenly decide that they didn’t need me, after all, and just let me go? Or did they already give me some instructions that I have no hope whatsoever to refuse, and they sent me off to do whatever they subconsciously tasked me to do? If that’s the case, I’m afraid to find out what they instructed me to do, and I’m afraid the instructions have something to do with killing the Doctor and River. I can’t imagine what I’ll try to do if one of them shows up.

As if this nightmare couldn’t get any worse, right on cue, I suddenly hear a loud knock at the front door, which startles me almost right off of the sofa.

Fudgeknuckle! They’ve found me! They’re gonna kill me!

I stand up slowly, gripping the knife tightly as I cautiously approach the door to peep through the window. If it truly is one of the Silence… Or worse, Nova—

I am interrupted mid-thought as there is another loud bang against the door, which makes my heart jump to my throat again. However, this time the knocks are followed by a familiar woman’s calm voice, which calls through the door, “Sydney? Sydney, sweetie, are you home? It’s alright; you don’t have to be afraid! It’s me, River Song! I’m here to help!”

I pause, frowning. River Song? As in, my mother? Is that really her?

I peek through the side window, and, indeed, see her standing there, her reddish-blond curls as wild as I’ve always remembered them to look; though her face bores an expression of concern.

I immediately open the door. “Mom!” I exclaim in relief. “Thank God it’s only you! I thought you were…uh…someone else.” I step back to allow her entry into the house.

“I suppose that would explain the knife in your hand,” she says, nodding to the knife in my white-knuckled grip, as she enters the house. “Don’t suppose you’d want to tell me what that’s about?” She then says with a slight chuckle, “Also, I can’t help but notice that you called me ‘mom’ again.” She says the word ‘mom’ in a mock-American accent.

“Sorry; habit,” I chuckle back awkwardly as I shut the door again and lock it.

“It’s quite alright, sweetie,” my mother assures me. “You can call me whatever you want, I don’t mind.”

As she walks casually into the Living Room, I suddenly have a strange urge to plunge the knife into my mother’s back, and I immediately chuck the knife into a side room to vanquish the unsettling urge. To distract me from thinking about it again, I ask curiously as I join her on the sofa, “Where’s Dad—I mean the Doctor?” She clearly came alone, which automatically made me feel a bit concerned for my father, no matter how coldhearted (times two) he was towards me before.

River pauses and sighs sadly. “He’s…still not in his right mind at the moment.” After a shake of her head, she says swiftly, “But I’m here, so you can talk to me.”

Regretfully, this tells me that their marriage didn’t work out as well as either of us had hoped, which makes me feel sad for them. Damn, this situation with Nova has really screwed them up good, and not in a legitimately good way.

“Anyway,” River says, changing the subject, “would you like to explain what happened not too long ago? You seem very agitated and shaken. Are you alright?”

“Not really,” I say, shaking my head. “I mean, I’m not alright, and I don’t really want to explain what happened either. It’s not that I think you won’t believe me, but rather what might happen if I do tell you…if that makes any sense.” A small part of me thinks that the Silence forbade me to say anything about their plans during our meeting earlier, but at the same time I feel I must explain for my mother’s sake as well as my father’s.

“I’m sorry, I’m afraid I don’t understand,” she confesses in a regretful tone.

“I mean that they’ll kill me if I tell you!” I groan. “Or they’ll kill you!”

“‘They?’” River asks, frowning. “You mean the Silence?”

I nod. “I think so. I don’t really know. I don’t remember what exactly happened, but I’m ninety-nine percent certain they were there. Nova too.”

“Nova?” River asks, shocked this time. “You saw my daughter?”

I shrug. “Again, I’m not entirely sure. I do remember talking to someone, though, but I don’t remember who it was exactly. It could’ve been Nova, but again I’m not sure.”

God, this feels so weird, talking about myself in the third person. I must sound like an idiot.

“Where exactly did you meet her?”

I sigh and reluctantly confirm, “There’s an old abandoned factory just down the street from here. I got a note from her earlier today when I visited my friend at the hospital. I recognized the handwriting immediately.”

“Do you still have the note?” River asks curiously.

I nod. “I do. Here.” I reach into my pocket, take out the crumpled note, uncrumple it, and hand it to her.

She takes a few seconds to inspect the note before she nods and says in a shaky voice, her face going pale, “Yup, that’s her handwriting, alright. I’d recognize it anywhere.”

“The note basically said to meet her at that factory,” I explain, “but I don’t want to go back, especially if they’re still there. I feel like I barely escaped them last time…but then again maybe they let me escape.”

River looks up at me, frowning. “They ‘let’ you escape? What do you mean?”

I sigh. “Again, I don’t remember what happened in there or anything that we talked about, but I know I was in there for at least twenty minutes before I ran away. For all I know, during that time, we were discussing ways to—” I immediately stop myself from finishing that sentence, as this is what I’m fairly certain was the exact topic I was forbidden to share with her, but I feel I have to anyway, especially if it could save her life later.

Or end her life.

What? No! Where did that thought even come from? Who in their right mind would come up with an idea like that? That’s the most ridiculous idea!

“Discussing ways to what?” River frowns at me, wondering why I didn’t continue.

I purse my lips nervously. “I think you know. They’ve been trying to do it for years. They even tried it with you before you betrayed them. For all I know, they may have been trying to get me in on it as well. In fact, they may already have.”

My mother pauses and backs away from me slightly, like she’s truly afraid of me. “You think…” she stammers. “You think you might try to kill me? The Doctor too?”

I pause, sputtering on my words. “I mean, I don’t want to, but…yeah. Maybe I would. That’s why I think you should leave. You may not be safe around me. I could snap at any moment and try to hurt you without knowing it or having any control of myself.”

River nods as she scoots back closer to me. “I understand that, Sydney, but I’m afraid I must disappoint you when I say I refuse to leave you.”

What?! Is she for real? Is she insane? That’s going to get her killed!

That’s the idea…

What?! No! Stop it! Stop thinking! You don’t even know what you’re thinking!

Oh, but I do. I want to kil—

No, you don’t! Just stop! Stop talking! Stop thinking!

“But you have to!” I say, frowning at her and completely ignoring the devilish thoughts in my head. “If I kill you—”

“You won’t kill me. I trust you won’t.”

Girl, she has no idea how wrong she is…

I said shut up, god damnit!

“You can’t be sure of that,” I can’t help arguing. “We know how the Silence work! If they give us a command—any command at all—we have no choice but to do it, no matter how sick and twisted the command is! For all I know, they may have tasked me to kill you in some way, same with Dad. I don’t know what that ‘way’ is, but I may not have a choice but to do it anyway, no matter how much I don’t want to do it! I can’t let that happen, certainly not to you or Dad! In my world, they attempted to do the same thing, and thankfully it didn’t happen, and that was how it was supposed to happen.”

“Hmm… Clearly things happened differently in your ‘world,’” River says, raising a quizzical eyebrow. “How exactly did it happen there?”

I sigh before explaining. “Well, I wasn’t raised by the Silence; that’s the main thing. In my world, Dad saved me from that happening to me. He connected with me through our psychic link, and he was able to find and take me away before the Silence could. You and Dad sent me to live with a couple—my current parents in this world—who adopted me. In my world, they couldn’t conceive, so they agreed to adopt me and keep me hidden from the Silence for my whole life. Yet, somehow, the Silence—or ‘Vokanari,’ as they were called in my world—found me anyway and secretly trained me in my weekly Aikido classes, but they never took me away since they knew Dad would find me as long as we were psychically connected with one another; though I never knew about our psychic connection, since he blocked his end to prevent me from knowing anything about you guys. When I finally found out the truth of my identity, I decided to leave my guardians, believing they’d be safer away from me—which was super naïve of me, since leaving them was what put them in more danger, needless to say. Not long after I left home, I met you guys, and you helped me rescue my family and stop the Silence…well, temporarily, anyway. Basically, I lived a safe and happy life away from the Silence, and that was how my story—uh, her story—was supposed to go. She was meant to be a much better person—a talented singer and musician, a loyal friend, and a loving daughter. She was meant to be…well, like you and Dad. Nothing at all like…whatever she is now.”

God knows how my father failed to save me in this world. Honestly, I don’t see how that can be possible for him, seeing as he very rarely—if at all—fails at anything. It just doesn’t seem like him to lose any battle.

Oh, Dad… What happened to you?

After my story, my mother smiles sincerely saying, “I believe you, Sydney. I believe every word. It sounds like you had a wonderful life in your world, and I promise I will do everything I can to help you return to it.”

“That’s the thing. I don’t think it’ll be as simple as hopping into the TARDIS and traveling to my world. Plus, the Doctor confirmed I wasn’t from another world; I’m from this one. But that’s wrong.”

“‘Wrong?’ What do you mean by that?”

“Remember when I mentioned that I must’ve been living in a sim?” I ask to give a bit of context to my explanation. “I mean, a simulation, like in the Matrix movies?”

“Vaguely,” River frowns. “Would you mind explaining all of that again please?”

“Sure,” I nod before asking again for clarification. “You are familiar with the Matrix movies, right? You mentioned you were before.”

“Yes,” River confirms. “You believe you’re trapped in the Matrix; not like in the film series, but you’re trapped in a similar one as depicted in the films?”

“Yes!” I exclaim. “That’s exactly what I think! Though I don’t remember how I got here.”

“Nothing at all?” she asks with a raised eyebrow.

I shake my head. “No; absolutely nothing. The earliest thing I can remember is waking up in my bed upstairs from a strange dream of my ‘other life.’ But at the same time I believed that ‘other life’ I dreamt about was real, and this was all fake.” I explain this as I gesture around us. “Like I said before, here my parents could conceive, hence how they had me; but in my other life, they couldn’t, hence why they adopted me. When I found this out, I knew that them being my real parents wasn’t true…no matter how much I wanted it to be true.”

I remember in my other life when I greatly wished that my guardians were my real parents instead of the Doctor and River, and how normal that felt before I learned the truth. A small part of me, admittedly, feels happy that I seemed to have gotten that exact wish in this world; however, things are not as exact as I expected. For instance, the Doctor and River are no longer my bio-parents and they now have an evil daughter who wants to kill them and the rest of creation, which was, of course, something that I did not plan to happen. Thankfully I still possess all of my original memories from my other life as it was before I ‘woke up’ in this world, but nothing is quite the same in this world, and it makes me feel like I have a responsibility to ‘fix’ this world back to the way as I described my life with River’s—with my true bio-mother’s—help.

“It’s strange…” I sigh after a minute of deep thought. “In this world, I got everything I wanted—well, most things. I was given the normal life I wanted…”

My last statement makes me pause, and a vague memory of someone giving me the option of choosing a different life for myself suddenly flashes in my mind. However, I can’t remember who offered me this option, but I can remember the specific option I chose—specifically, how I wanted my life to be changed, hence how I ended up in this world; however, nothing is quite right with the ‘world’ I chose for myself. Several moments from my original life still happened as they did then, but they are slightly different in this world, neither of which I expected to happen the way that they did here. In other words, these events happened differently solely because I’m no longer a Time Lord. Some examples include: the Sontaran at the arcade was simply there to wreak havoc on the locals rather than being sent there by the Silence to hunt me and deliver me to them; this version of Hazel is not the true friend that I thought she was; and my own parents, the Doctor and River, don’t even trust me just because I know so much about them, and, instead, they’re too preoccupied with the situation with their daughter having become the psycho-killer that River was originally meant to become. I don’t know what the hell I was thinking when I made that decision to create this world as it is, but it was the dumbest decision I have ever made by far, and I regret it immensely.

“But it’s not exactly the normal life you wanted,” my mother finishes in a sympathetic tone, seemingly having read my thoughts. “As you said, you got most of what you wanted, but at a cost.”

“I lost you and the Doctor,” I nod, confirming said ‘cost’ shamefully. “Somehow, I wished you guys out of my life, and as a result you lost your daughter—your true daughter, I mean.” You lost me, I add in my head before continuing out loud. “I created this world, and I don’t know how to get out of it and back to my true world.” I pause, suddenly remembering seeing and hearing the words ‘wake up’ in seemingly random places, and add, “I don’t know how to wake up. I want to go home. I want my old life back.”

I want to be a Time Lord again, I add once again in my head, my eyes flooding with tears as I bury my face in my hands and sob into them. I want to be your daughter again.

Because of this selfish wish, a large part of me feels responsible for giving the Doctor and River an evil daughter in my place, and I feel awful about it. Because of my selfishness, this ‘fake world’ is the price I now have to pay, and the Doctor and River have to pay for my selfishness as well by dealing with my evil self. I feel so ashamed to be seemingly ruining the Doctor’s and River’s lives with my stupidity and selfishness.

When will I ever learn? When will I ever ‘woman up?’

“I don’t remember how all of this happened…” I continue sobbing in my hands. “What I did to create this world. Whatever I did, I was stupid to do it. I was selfish.” For all I know, I was tricked into creating this ‘world’ for myself and putting all other more important matters—specifically, how this choice would affect my loved ones—aside. I feel my mother wrap her arms around me in comfort, like she and the Doctor always do, as I continue my confession. “I never meant for any of this to happen, certainly not for you and Dad to deal with an evil me. I’m sorry I made you lose her—lose me. I’m so sorry.”

“Hush, sweetie,” my mother soothes as she combs her fingers lightly through my hair. “There’s no need to ask for forgiveness. I’m not angry at all.”

“How can you not be?” I frown, looking incredulously up at her. “Your daughter is an evil psychopath because of me, and I don’t think there’s any way to turn her back!”

“I’m sure there’s a way,” River shakes her head, “and I’m sure you can do it.”

“How? Like the Doctor said, she’s too far gone to be saved. She’s not gonna have any interest in talking to us; only killing us!”

“But you know who she is. Who she truly is. You told me so yourself just a minute ago.”

“So you truly believe we’re the same person?” I ask in a semi-doubtful tone.

River nods. “I do. The life you described was just as how I imagined my child’s life to be like.”

I snort. “What; as a singer and musician?”

She shakes her head. “No. As the brave and loyal friend and daughter that she was always meant to be. A girl that would grow to be just like her father and me one day.” She then smiles at me and adds while combing my hair out of my tearstained face, “And I see all of that in you. You, Sydney, are the daughter I’ve always wanted to have. My ‘Nova.’”

“But I’m not your daughter,” I frown. “Not biologically. Not anymore.”

River nods in slight agreement. “No, but you can help our daughter into becoming the woman she was meant to be. Help her to become like you.”

“I don’t know how I can do that,” I admit with a sigh. “I don’t think simply talking to her will be enough.”

“You mentioned talking to her at that factory earlier this evening, did you not?”

“I don’t remember any of that. I don’t even remember what we talked about.”

“Then perhaps we should return to that factory and try again,” River suggests.

“YES, WE SHOULD!” I automatically blurt out before instantly pausing and frowning, thinking in utter disbelief, Wait, what?! Where did that come from?

“Are you sure you want to go back, Sydney?” River frowns, puzzled as to why I exclaimed in that manner; and, admittedly, I’m not sure why either. “You said you didn’t want to go back before. Are you absolutely sure?”

“YES!” I blurt out again without meaning to. I frown to myself again, thinking, Dude, why do I keep saying that? Of course we shouldn’t go; that would be stupid! “I-I mean, no!” I continue out loud, shaking my head again. “Why should we go back? That’s suicide! She could kill us! Assuming she’s even still there…”

“If she is still there, then this could be your chance to talk to her,” my mother says as she stands up from the sofa in preparation to leave. “Connect with her. As I said, you know who she really is. You can use that knowledge to turn her back. Help her become the woman and daughter that she’s supposed to be. Teach her who the real enemy is.”

I pause, suddenly remembering the time I encountered an evil version of myself during the ‘fear’ adventure in Victorian London in my other life. I remember my speech and how it seemed to affect Evil Nova in a somewhat positive way. At the time, I felt like I had truly come through to her, even for just a second, and I bet I could do it again if I had the chance, but I could do it for much longer—maybe even indefinitely.

‘Being a Time Lord doesn’t make you a god,’ I recall my own words to my evil ‘fear’ self. ‘It’s just what we’re called! We don’t own the universe; we explore what has yet to be discovered! We save what has once been lost! We heal what has once been damaged! We correct what has once been wronged! Those are the true meanings and responsibilities of being a Time Lord! Everything you were taught by the Vokanari was wrong! They know nothing about the Time Lords—about us, nor about Dad! We seek to protect what the Vokanari seek to destroy! Trust me, this isn’t you—this isn’t us! We’re so much better than this! Please, wake up from this delusion and come back to the Light! There is good in you, I know it! I know myself—I know you!’

“I… I’ve done it before…” I mutter uncertainly.

“That’s great!” River praises me.

“But it was only for a brief second… And she wasn’t really real; she was just a ‘fear’ projection…”

“But you got through to her, even just for a brief moment, like you said. Perhaps if you tried harder, you could get through to her for much longer.”

“I still don’t know…” I say, still feeling nervous about the idea. It seems way too risky, even for us.

“You can do it,” my mother says with much confidence in her voice. “I know you can; you’ve done it before. If it doesn’t work, we’ll try something else; that’s what my Vortex Manipulator is for.” She says this as she lifts up her wrist that holds said device. “If things go south, we’ll use this to escape.”

“You really think I can do it?” I say doubtfully. “What if I can’t? What if the Silence are there, and they take control of my mind again?”

River shakes her head. “They won’t. I’ll make sure of it. I’ll use my gun on them if I need to.” She pats at her holster at her hip as she says this. “We’ll be fine, Sydney. I promise.”

“Fine,” I say, feeling like she won’t give me any other choice. “Let’s go.”

“Let me see that note again,” she says as she reaches for the slip of paper that was left on the table and skims it before interacting with her Vortex Manipulator by plugging the coordinates into it. After a minute, she straightens up again and says as she offers her arm out to me, “Alright. Vortex Manipulator is set. You ready?”

“I don’t really have a choice, do I?” I sigh with a shrug.

“We may not get another chance after this,” she confirms. “It’s now or never.”

I sigh again as I reluctantly take my mother’s arm, “Well, in that case, then yeah, I’m ready.”

“Hold on tight!” my mother says as she activates her Vortex Manipulator, and we disappear in a flash.

In the blink of an eye, the scenery changes from my Living Room to the field outside the abandoned factory.

“Ugh,” I wince as I wrap my arms around my stomach, suddenly feeling sick and dizzy. “I’ve forgotten how it feels to use that thing.”

“You’ve used a Vortex Manipulator before?” my mother asks, seeming legitimately shocked.

I nod with a shrug. “Yeah, once, with you—I mean you from my world. Honestly, every time after using it, I felt like puking.” Kinda like I feel right now, I add in my head as I rub my stomach in a circular motion to soothe the queasiness.

River chuckles. “Not a fan, eh? I don’t blame you. My husband doesn’t like them either. He refers to them as ch—”

“‘Cheap and nasty time-travel,’” I interrupt. “Yeah, I know. He’s used that phrase many times.”

“I suppose I’m just used to using it,” River shrugs, “since I’ve used it for a very long time. I’ve had to repair it multiple times.” She then sighs, staring up at the factory, which now looks much darker and gloomier than the last time I was here. “Right. Shall we go inside?”

Again, are you really going to give me any other choice? I think in my head before shrugging as I illuminate my flashlight, “I’ll lead. Maybe I can remember where I went last time. Keep your eyes peeled.”

“You don’t have to tell me twice,” my mother says as she takes out her own flashlight and scanner as we enter the factory.

Of course, I’m not too thrilled to be returning to this place, but at least now I have my mother with me to watch my back. If anything or anyone attempts to attack me again, at least my mother is around to fend off the danger for me this time. Plus, if I end up forgetting anything again, perhaps my mother might remember what happened even after we leave. In any case, I don’t plan on taking any chances in forgetting this time.

“God, I hate this place so much,” I say after a few minutes of walking through the creepy hallways. “I heard kids from my school like to come here to hang out, mostly to do illegal stuff like drugs and whatnot. God knows why they insist on choosing this place as their hangout spot.”

“Perhaps because it’s abandoned,” River suggests, “and it’s a place where no one would think to go because it’s so unstable and unsafe.”

“Well, aside from that,” I shrug back. “Even in my ‘other life,’ this place existed, but I never went there because I thought it was too creepy.”

“I don’t blame you. I can honestly say I’m a little creeped out myself.”

“You are?” I say, shocked. “That’s surprising. I never knew you to be afraid of anything…aside from the Silence, anyway.”

“The Silence raised me in an abandoned orphanage when I was a child,” she admits with a small shrug. “Needless to say, I’m used to places like this, even when they still sometimes creep me out to this day.”

“Oh, yeah, that’s right,” I say, suddenly remembering. “You told me that story.” I remember how my mother described being raised by her guardian, Dr. Renfrew, and the Silence who always warped Renfrew’s mind, preventing him from ever leaving, even when he often wrote messages on the walls all over the orphanage to remind him of the danger he was in but could never remember why he wrote those messages or what their purpose was. She described it as ‘a very cruel predicament.’ Yeah, no kidding, Mother. I can’t even imagine…

“Poor Dr. Renfrew…” she sighs sadly to herself. “I hope he’s found some peace after all these years.”

I can’t help but notice that she seemed to speak of her former guardian like he’s possibly dead, and it makes me feel sorry for them both, especially for him. Thinking back on her story, it makes me angry that the Silence had messed with Dr. Renfrew’s mind so much to the point of him going mad and possibly driving him to end his own life just to end the torment. Suppose that Dr. Renfrew is still alive, I hope he got the help he deserved—even though it must’ve took several years of therapy—and is living a much happier life now.

“I think we’re almost there,” I say, steering back on track. “I vaguely remember going this direction, through those doors.” I say this as I point my flashlight beam in said direction.

“Stay cautious, Sydney,” River warns me. “We don’t know what might be in there. You should stay behind me.” She takes out her gun as she says this.

“I’ll be fine,” I assure her. “I don’t think she wants to hurt me. She let me go last time.”

“She must’ve done that for a reason,” River points out while stepping forward toward the hallway. “We don’t know what that reason is; you had that memory taken away. She’s more dangerous than you think. Stay behind me. Rather she hurt me than you.”

“I don’t want you getting hurt either,” I protest. “That’s why I didn’t want to come back here.”

“There’s no time for discussion, Sydney,” she says, shaking her head. “We need to do this. As I said, it’s now or never. Get behind me now.” She pulls me back with force as she walks inside the room that I remember entering the last time I was here, but completely forgetting what was inside after I left in my apparent panic. I reluctantly follow close behind.

We enter the room, shining our flashlights around at all the various piles of debris, looking for any evidence of any signs of life, but, strangely, there seems to be none. None at all.

“There’s no one here,” I frown, frustrated that there seems to be no evidence anywhere—at least none that I can remember from the last time I was in here. “They must’ve left.” Somehow, I knew that this was the very room where I had that meeting, but there is absolutely no evidence that suggests that at all. A small part of me wants to be hopeful that we seemingly came here for nothing, but something in my gut tells me that we shouldn’t celebrate yet, not knowing what will happen next. Perhaps there could still be something here… Or someone…

None of this feels right… Something is very wrong here… We shouldn’t be here. We should never have come here.

“Look around,” River insists. “They may have left behind some evidence.”

I frown at this. “What’s there to—Fudgeknuckle!” I scream in horror as my flashlight illuminates a small figure step out from behind a wall—a girl I know all too well.

“Nova!” River gasps upon seeing her daughter, who smirks at her like she’s a piece of meat.

“Hello, ‘Mummy Dearest,’” my evil twin grins while speaking in a British accent, which, admittedly, sounds so surreal to me. “Long time no see. I rather hoped I’d see you first, and here you are, just as we’ve planned.” She then turns to me and adds with much praise in her tone of voice, “And welcome back, Sydney. You brought her straight to me, just like I asked. Well done.”

“‘Well done?’” my mother frowns incredulously at me, like she thinks I’ve betrayed her, which of course I did no such thing.

I frown back, shaking my head. “I told you, I don’t remember! I told you she may have manipulated my mind when I came here last!” I knew I should never have answered that note! I curse myself in my head. Ugh, how could I have been so stupid?!

“You’re right,” my evil self chuckles, “I did. But it wasn’t just me. I had help. Would you like to meet them—again? Not that you’d remember them either.”

“Nova, please, you don’t have to do this!” River pleads to her daughter for what I imagine to be the millionth time since her initial turn to the Dark Side. “This isn’t how we wanted you to grow up to be! You have to stop this now!”

Evil Me shakes her head. “Sorry, ‘Mummy,’ but you can’t ‘baby me’ anymore. You forget that I’m a grownup now. I’m a leader now. That means I don’t take orders from anyone anymore. I give the orders now.”

“No!” River says in an insistent tone, shaking her head. “Nova, this isn’t like you!”

“She’s right!” I butt in, stepping forward with my hands raised in a peaceful manner. “I know the real you! You’re not like this at all! You were never meant to become this! Just let me explain!”

My evil twin shakes her head again, saying with a snort, “We’ve had this exact conversation before—not that you’d remember any of it—and I don’t have the time, nor the patience, to listen to it again. I have more important matters to attend to, such as ‘silencing’ you and the Doctor once and for all—pun intended. As foretold in the Prophecy, Silence—the Doctor’s silence—will fall, and it shall fall tonight… Starting with you, ‘Mother!’”

“NO!”

The last thing I remember is Evil Nova snapping her fingers, and then everything goes dark for a moment as the sinister words, ‘The deed is done,’ are suddenly spoken in my head before everything becomes clear and still once again.

Once I am able to regain my senses fully, there is a large pit left in my stomach once I notice that Nova and the Silence have vanished without a trace once more…

Only that’s not the most disturbing thing.

The most disturbing thing is the fact that I have somehow acquired my mother’s gun, now smoking at the tip, and I’m pointing it straight at her…

At her chest which is now stained with blood.

Chapter Text

“MOM!” I cry in absolute horror at what I’ve done.

I immediately drop the gun and run to her side. I drop down on my knees and lean over her to assess the damage. There is a large gun blast across her chest, and her entire front is stained with dark-red blood, and it’s spreading fast, forming a pool on the floor around her.

“Oh my god!” I gasp in shock, feeling sick to my stomach. “I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean—”

“Don’t worry about it…Sydney,” she chokes out in pain. “Just…call my husband.”

“Okay…” I say as I take out my cellphone from my pocket, fumbling with it due to the intense shaking in my hands. “Um…” I scroll through my ‘Contacts’ list for the Doctor’s (technically the TARDIS’s) number, but I can’t find it. Of course, I think to myself, because this isn’t my world. Of course I wouldn’t have it since I never properly knew the Doctor in this world, even though I did in my ‘other world.’ Instead, I take a few seconds to try and recall what the exact number was, but I can’t seem to remember it either; and even if I did, who’s to say it’s not the same number as in my other world? “I don’t have his number!” I groan after a minute, eventually giving up. “I don’t remember what it is!”

“Use my communicator…” River grunts as she struggles to pull out the specific device from her pocket. She hands it to me with bloody hands, staining it with red. “Send him…a message… Tell him…I’m hurt and…I need him…”

“How do we know whether he’ll respond to it right away?” I ask in a worried tone, thinking about how bad my father is at his timing (which is quite ironic, especially for a time-traveler). “How do we know whether it’ll be sent to the correct Doctor?” I add, highly doubting that any other Doctors before my father’s specific variant will respond to the message since they wouldn’t know who River is.

“It will be sent to the correct Doctor,” River assures me. “I’ve…programmed it to do so. He should respond to it right away…as long as you word it just right. Don’t…worry about including the time and coordinates. It…should adjust automatically…when you send it. Please…hurry.”

“Okay…” I say again, this time with a nervous sigh, before focusing on the communicator that River had given me. Even if the message would be sent to my father’s specific variant, I seriously doubt he would take it very seriously if it’s sent from me, so I decide to word the message exactly like my mother would, knowing he’d take it more seriously if it’s worded in a way like my mother had written the message herself. I make sure to type in as few words as possible, not knowing how much time River has left to live. I type the following message: ‘Hurt badly and bleeding out. Please come quickly. -RS’, before sending it off, hoping it would reach my father in time and he responds to it in time as well. “It’s sent,” I assure my mother immediately after as I set her communicator aside and turn my focus back on her wound. “Tell me what I can do to help you. I need to stop you bleeding out, or at least try to slow the flow.”

“There’s…nothing you can do…” she shakes her head apologetically, “except to wait… He’ll be here…soon…”

I bite my lips together, both nervous and anxious to find out how my father will respond once he sees my mother—his wife—in this condition. I sincerely hope he won’t automatically blame me for what’s happened, even though I partially blame myself. Deep down, I know that this was all the Silence’s doing, but I was stupid to fall for their schemes, despite being taught by the Doctor in my other life to never do this, but I seemed to let it happen anyway, even when I never meant to. Would he even believe me?

“Tell me more…” River asks suddenly, seemingly out of the blue, after a long minute.

“Tell you more what?” I ask her when she doesn’t immediately clarify.

“About her…” she finally does clarify after another few seconds. “About my daughter… About you… Tell me more about her life… About your life… What else was she—you—like?”

“Well…” I pause, thinking. “I—uh, she—saved your life…” I’m not sure whether it’s more appropriate to describe ‘Nova’s’ life in first or third person, but I decide to stick with third person for now.

“You saved my life…” Mom smiles, and I can’t help but notice that her voice sounds significantly weaker now, which increases my concern to the millions. “How?”

On the plus side, at least she prefers—or at least seems to prefer—that I describe her daughter in first person (i.e. from my own point of view), which clearly shows how much she believes me to be her true daughter. “Well, it was more like I gave my life to save you,” I say with a shrug.

“And yet…you survived. Tell me how.”

“It’s a long story…” I sigh.

“No matter,” River says, shaking her head. “Tell me everything. I want to hear…the entire story.”

I sigh again, ultimately deciding to continue my story from earlier. “When we found out my guardians were kidnapped by the Silence, you decided to search for them in Dad’s and my place, but the Silence—” I suddenly pause mid-sentence when I feel the room grow colder and windier seemingly without reason.

Weird… There shouldn’t be any wind in here. There’re no windows in this part of the building.

“But the Silence what?” my mother questions me when I don’t continue; though she seems unbeknownst to the inexplicable breeze in the air. “Tell me.”

“Sorry…” I say slowly as I look around, trying to determine exactly what’s causing the strange phenomenon. “Can you feel that? That wind… Where’s it coming from?” It feels almost…paranormal.

No…Extraterrestrial, I correct myself in my head as I begin hearing a faint whooshing sound in the air as the wind gradually picks up, swirling dust from off the floor around us.

“It’s him…” River smiles as the faint sounds become increasingly louder, and they sound much more alien yet familiar at the same time. “He’s here… My Doctor…” She says those last words as she slowly closes her eyes as she seemingly begins to lose consciousness.

“No, no, no!” I cry in panic as I gently shake her shoulders to keep her awake. “Mom, don’t close your eyes! You need to stay awake; do you hear me? Stay with me! Come on, don’t die on me! You can’t die; this isn’t where it happens! You have to stay awake! Come on, Mom, wake up!” I fruitlessly continue begging for my mother to stay alive as an all-too-familiar blue box materializes next to us, and for the first time in my entire life I am legitimately scared to see it.

The TARDIS doors creak open, and my father steps out, clad in his usual tweed jacket and bow tie. “Alright, River, I got your message! What seems to be the trouble this t—RIVER!” he gasps upon seeing the growing pool of blood covering and surrounding River’s body. “Get away from her!” he yells at me as he pushes me away and immediately gathers my mother’s body in his arms, completely ignoring the blood staining his clothing. Once he sees the grisly wound on her chest, he immediately places his hand over it to stop the blood flow, but it’s no use; she’s lost too much blood. “What the hell did you do to her?!” he screams at me in disbelief before he turns his focus on his dying wife and begins caressing her cheek to attempt to rouse her. “River! River, can you hear me?”

“I-I-It wasn’t my fault!” I stammer, not knowing any believable words to say to ease the growing tension. “I-I-I didn’t mean to… The Silence—they made me do it!”

“The hell they did!” he snaps back at me, not believing me in the slightest. “You are the only one still here!” He turns his focus back on River once again. “River, come on! Don’t do this to me! I’m not losing you today or any other day! Wake up!” When she doesn’t immediately wake, he deepens his voice to a growl toward me. “I’ll deal with you later. Right now I want you to leave. Now. Go! Leave me!”

“Dad, let me exp—” I attempt to protest, but he cuts me off.

“NO! DO NOT CALL ME THAT! I AM NOT YOUR FATHER! I AM NO FATHER TO ANYONE! GO! LEAVE ME, AND DON’T EVER CALL ME AGAIN! GO NOW!” Hot tears begin streaming down his cheeks as he says this.

“Dad—” I attempt to protest again.

“NOW!” he screams so loud that his outburst can be heard throughout the entire building and all the way to my neighborhood.

Not having any other choice but to do what he says, I get up on my feet and begin walking away when I suddenly hear my mother’s weak voice speak up from behind me.

“Sweetie…” she whispers joyfully toward her husband.

“River! You’re alive! Don’t worry; I’m here. I’ve got you,” he gasps in relief as he grips her body tighter before looking back up at me and screaming once more, “I SAID GO! GET OUT OF HERE! DON’T EVER COME BACK! GO!”

This time, I rush out of the room entirely, but not before stopping on the other side of the wall in the adjacent hallway. I lean against the wall and slowly peek around the corner as I silently watch my parents and listen to their final conversation to one another—their final goodbye.

“Doctor…” my mother begs him in a weak voice. “Don’t be too hard on her. This wasn’t her fault…”

“Of course it was!” the Doctor snaps angrily. “The Silence put her up to this. I said she was their pawn all along. I said she could never be trusted.”

“Sweetie… No…” she shakes her head. “You’ve got it all wrong. She’s not a bad person. It was my idea to come here. It was a mistake. Sydney absolutely can be trusted. I talked to her…got to know her. She wants to help us. She wants to help her. Please… You must give her another chance.”

“I can’t. There’s no one else in the universe I can trust anymore. Not even…” He pauses and bites his lip to punish himself for what he’s about to say next. “Not even our daughter. There is only you, River. I’ve told you time and time again, she can never be saved. Not ever again.”

“But Sydney can. She knows her—the real her. She is her. If you just give her another chance, you’ll begin to see that. I see it in her. I see her in her. Please…my love… Talk to her… Listen to her story. You’ll see they are the same person. Help her to save our daughter. She’s the only one who can save our daughter. It’s the only way she can return home.”

“She’s not from another universe. The TARDIS already confirmed that.”

“As I said, if you just take the time to listen to her story, things will be much clearer. As I said, you don’t have to believe her, but you should at least try to trust her. Trust that that girl can save our daughter and bring her back to us. Bring her back to you.” She pauses before lifting her palm up to caress her husband’s tearstained cheek. “Please, Doctor… Do that for me while I’m gone.”

“‘While you’re gone?’” he echoes in an incredulous tone before vigorously shaking his head and gripping her body tighter. “No! No, no, no, you’re not dying! Don’t talk like you’re dying! Don’t you dare, River Song! Don’t you dare leave me!” He says all of this as more tears flood his eyes. “I’ll heal you! I’ll use up the rest of my Regeneration Energy, like you did for me! You’ll be alright!”

“Sweetie… There’s nothing you can do for me now. Not even Regeneration Energy will help me; you don’t have enough left to use. I’m sorry, my love.”

“No! Stop saying that! You’re not dying! You can’t die! Not here! This isn’t where you die! You die at The Library!” He reveals this spoiler without really meaning to, but he doesn’t seem to care as he continues. “You die saving me and many others! That was how it all started for me—for us—and that’s how it ends for you! Please, you can’t die here!”

“Time can be rewritten, sweetie,” she sighs in response.

“No!” the Doctor snaps again. “Not that time! Not Darillium! Not any of those other places and times I planned to take you! I won’t allow any of those times to disappear! ‘Not one line,’ remember? That was always our promise! I will not break it! Come on, River Song! Don’t give up on me now! Stay with me!”

“I’m sorry, my love,” she sighs again. “I’m afraid…I can’t be helped. But you can help our daughter. Help Nova. She needs you. Help her find herself again—her true self. Let Sydney help you. She knows her…and she knows you. Everything that’d happened with our daughter has torn you apart. Let Sydney mend you back together again. She knows who you are; who you really are. Before you help Nova, you must find yourself again first.”

“River…” he sighs again as he begins to sob uncontrollably, and I begin doing the same behind the wall, knowing that this is the legitimate end for my mother…at least in this world.

“Please…my love… My Doctor…” she whispers as she slowly begins losing consciousness. “Find yourself again… Find Nova… Reconnect with her… Teach her to love again…like I have always loved you…”

“River Song… Melody Pond…” Dad whispers back. “I have always loved you since the day I first met you. You are seared onto my hearts for all eternity.” Hearing these words makes me sob more, remembering how my Doctor had said those same words a thousand times to me in my other world.

“Kiss me…” my mother whispers barely loud enough for me to hear behind the wall, wrapping her fingers around the back of her husband’s neck and pulling him down to her level. “One last time…”

“It won’t be the last time,” he shakes his head as he accepts her request, leaning down to her. “I will kiss you forever, from now until the end of Time.”

And he immediately does just that. I watch as my father kisses my mother with every ounce of his being, putting all of his love into that single, final kiss. He doesn’t stop, not even as her hand falls from his cheek and she falls still and silent in his arms.

I stifle back a choked sob as I cover my mouth with my hands, seeing that my father hasn’t acknowledged the fact that my mother has just died, yet he continues to kiss her like she hasn’t passed at all in his mind. Like he can’t lose her as long as he holds their kiss between them. Eventually he does release the kiss, and once he puts his focus on his now dead wife, who lays peacefully and contently in his arms, he automatically wails in anguish as he rocks her body back-and-forth and buries his face in her blood-soaked curls. At this point, I can’t help but wail with him, having just watched my mother die from a distance rather than physically be with her like I originally planned to.

After a second, I see my father’s head immediately shoot up at the sound of my cries, and before he has a chance to yell at me again, I immediately rush away, this time completely out of the building and into the pouring rain outside. Once I’ve exited the building, I collapse on my knees and continue wailing into the gale, not caring about my clothes getting soaked and muddied in the process. After several minutes of this, I eventually hear the TARDIS’s dematerialization noises from deep inside the building, and I take this as my cue to make my way back home. Unfortunately I have to go back home on foot, as I don’t have my mother’s Vortex Manipulator nor my bike with me, so it will take twice as long to get home. I continue to cry during the entire journey home.

Thankfully I make it back home in the nick of time as the thunderstorm worsens. Once I lock up the house, I immediately go to my sofa and collapse on it and continue sobbing uncontrollably into one of the pillows. I feel so ashamed of what happened at that damned factory and how much I completely botched any chances I had of returning to my world, knowing that my father will have no interest whatsoever in helping me now. I feel even more ashamed of myself for creating this world—however the hell I created it in the first place—that I now refuse to live in anymore, but have no choice but to live in it now anyway. I feel now more than ever to return home back to my world, but I might not ever get that chance now after what I’ve done. I’m stuck here forever, and there’s absolutely nothing I can do about it now.

I am completely unaware of how much time that passes—it must’ve been hours, or possibly minutes; I’m really not sure—as I hear my father’s voice unexpectedly whisper my (fake) name from behind.

“Sydney…”

I involuntarily gasp upon hearing his voice, and I immediately jump up from the sofa and see him standing there on the other side with a remorseful look on his face. “W-What’re you doing here?” I ask him nervously, thinking he’s here to severely punish me for the death of his beloved wife. I briefly wonder how he came into the house at all, as I remember locking every door and window the instant I came home (unless he simply used his sonic screwdriver to get in; that, or he’d been hiding in my house the entire time I’ve been back and I never even knew). I also notice that he seems to have changed his clothing, this time wearing a long dark-green overcoat, and he seems to have aged slightly, though I can’t tell if he’s physically aged due to general time or from extreme mourning.

“Please…” he says as he raises his hands up in a peaceful manner. “I’m not here to hurt you. I just…” He sighs heavily before shaking his head and admitting the purpose of his intrusion. “I just want to apologize.” From the tone of his voice, he sounds honest.

I also notice that my mother is not with him, which mercilessly gives me the indication that she is truly gone. However, for some odd reason I don’t want my father knowing that I know this, that I secretly watched her die, even though he demanded that I leave them alone. “River…” I hesitantly ask. “Is she…?”

He almost doesn’t have to say anything at all—the rueful look on his face and his puffy eyes ‘speak’ for themselves—yet he decides to speak aloud anyway, albeit in a volume that I almost can’t hear. “Yes…” he says in a shaky voice while bowing his head in shame. “She’s gone.” This makes me sob more. “I didn’t have enough—” he adds before abruptly stopping himself from saying the word ‘energy,’ as in ‘Regeneration Energy.’ “I couldn’t save her,” he says instead, closing his eyes in regret, and I see another tear trace its way down his cheek, but he ignores it, barely seeming to register its presence.

I can’t prevent myself from breaking down in endless tears again. “I’m sorry… I’m so sorry! This was all my fault! We should never have gone there! I should never have made that stupid mistake to create this world! I should never have done this to her—to you! I don’t know what I was thinking to make that choice! I should never have made that choice! I never meant for any of this to happen! I never meant for her to become that! I never meant for Mom to get killed! I never meant for you to be going through all of this! I never meant for you to lose her—lose me! I am so sorry, Dad!” I decisively call him ‘Dad,’ no longer caring how he would respond to the title; I’ve got more than enough problems to worry about than that. This time I completely lose strength in my legs, and I collapse to the floor.

The Doctor immediately responds by doing something totally unexpected. He rushes to me, falls down to his knees, and wraps his arms around me in a tight hug, just like he always did in my other world. Surprisingly he also begins sobbing, burying his face in my hair, and I automatically wrap my own arms around him, refusing to let go; for if I do, even just slightly, he might surely disappear from me just like River.

Thinking of River, I briefly wonder where the Doctor had sent her body. Perhaps he took her somewhere/somewhen beautiful (The Singing Towers of Darillium, perhaps?), and he buried her there. I also wonder how much my father’s timeline has changed because of her death. Originally she was supposed to die at The Library, and that was also the same place where my father first met her. Since she died before The Library, Time would change in a way where the expedition never happened; therefore my father never went there either, since River was the one who summoned him there to begin with. With this happening, how would this affect my father’s timeline? Would he completely forget who my mother even is? Or would Time adjust where the second time he met her would become the first time (in this case, The Crash of the Byzantium), and everything else following that event (i.e. their Judas Tree poisoning in 1930s Berlin, their marriage to one another, my birth, etc.) would stay the same? Would their love for each other still remain as strong as the very fabric of Time itself?

Eventually, once we’ve calmed down enough, the Doctor leads me to the sofa, and we collapse on it with our arms still wrapped tightly around each other, just like old times. This makes me feel like I’ve genuinely gotten my real father back, and I couldn’t be more content to be back in his arms again.

If only my mother was here too…

“I’m sorry for the way I’ve been treating you,” the Doctor speaks up after several minutes. “It wasn’t like me at all to treat you so horribly.”

“I get it,” I assure him. “You were angry. Anger can make you say a lot of shitty things.”

“Oi. Language,” he snaps at me, nudging me lightly in the arm with his elbow.

“Sorry,” I shrug back. “I’m not wrong though.”

“No, you’re not,” he admits with a sigh. “You are absolutely right. I’ve had a lot of things to be angry about lately, and I know I shouldn’t be angry, but I can’t help but be angry anyway. I’m sorry for some of the things I may have said that upset you. I promise, I didn’t mean to say those things at all. I swear.”

“It’s fine. You’re here now.” I then pause before admitting, “This may sound a little weird to you since you don’t know me, but…I’ve missed you.”

“‘Missed’ me?” he frowns, puzzled.

“I mean as a father,” I confirm, sitting up slightly so I’m facing him properly. “My father. I know you don’t believe me when I say I’m your real daughter, but it’s true. I really am your daughter, Nova. Or I’m supposed to be. As I said before, it’s complicated.”

“River said just before she—” he starts but then stops, refusing to say the ‘D’ word out loud. Instead, he says, “River said you had quite the long story to tell me. She said it would help makes things clearer for me to understand your situation and to learn more about Nov—” He pauses again. “About her. About you. About what her life should’ve been like.”

“It really is a long story…” I admit with a heavy sigh. “But if it will help you learn to trust me properly, then I’ll be willing to tell you everything—literally everything. As long as you’re willing to listen to every word.”

The Doctor pauses for a few more seconds before giving me a small smile, showing his true willingness to listen. “You have my full attention, Sydney Marie Elise.”

“Thank you,” I smile back at him before sighing nervously. “Okay… Where do I even start…” I begin telling him my entire life.

I begin telling him about my mostly safe life on Earth with my guardians. I include my first Regeneration when I was four years old due to aspirin and my Aikido classes with ‘Master Kang’ (if that was even his real name) whom I didn’t know was secretly a member of the Silence. I briefly describe my side hobbies of singing and acoustic guitar playing throughout my childhood. I recall some instances when I saw River from a distance, how curious I was to know who she was every time I saw her, and how strange it was every time I would try to approach her for answers but she would shake her head and walk away like it wasn’t the right time yet to talk and disappear shortly thereafter, which aggravated me for years. I even describe times while I was coming into my ‘superpowers,’ I had felt alone, but my best friend Hazel was always around to support me even after I told her my secret not long after we were attacked by the Sontaran at the arcade (I point out this event happening differently in my world and describe how it was like then).

I then explain how while I was coming into my ‘powers,’ I began feeling like my family was no longer safe around me, and I decided to leave them after high school graduation, which ended up being a massive mistake later on. I explain how my leaving them gave the Silence an opening to step in and kidnap them, and they did the same to Hazel when she went with me to London to help me find my bio-parents as well as study abroad together (the latter of which wasn’t as important to me at the time). Around this time, I met River properly when she saved me from a group of Silence members who cornered me in an alley, and she brought me back to the TARDIS to meet the Doctor.

After they explained who they were and why they gave me up, everything changed after that. I explain how much of a struggle it was to accept who and what I was—that I was far from human and was destined to be something even greater. I learned from my father all about my ancestry as one of the last surviving Time Lords, and I was born to take up my father’s mantle of traversing all of Time and Space, saving planets, rescuing civilizations, and defeating terrible creatures that would do harm to all things that are good. After we saved my kidnapped family from the foul clutches of the Silence, I continued my travels with the Doctor, and I grew to trust and love him as a father and River as a mother.

I then go on to tell the story of how I saved River’s life at the cost of my own. Before telling the story, I mention that I was going to tell River this story as she was dying, but I never got the chance to once the Doctor showed up and shooed me away. I explain how the Silence took over River’s mind again while she was trying to save my kidnapped family, but she ended up being captured. River was stuck under their mind-control until I entered her mind, using my telepathic abilities that the Doctor had taught me, and I was able to temporarily break River free from the mind-control, but the damage had already been done before River realized what was happening. She ended up stabbing me through one of my hearts, which almost killed me if not for my ability to regenerate. Meanwhile, River was put into surgery to remove the ‘Inhibitor Chip’ in her head (which was performed by my grandfather, Rory Williams), which she survived without additional problems. Once we all recovered, Mom went back to teaching at her university on the moon in the future, and I went off to study abroad in London in the Present Day with Hazel as we initially planned, and I would continue my travels with the Doctor every other semester.

“But something must’ve happened while we were on one of our adventures,” I say as I finish my story. “I don’t remember much, but I do have this vague memory of being offered the chance to change my life, and I must’ve agreed and changed it to the point where it changed my entire being; in other words, it changed me from a Time Lord to an ordinary human, and it changed you and River as well where you guys are no longer my parents. Though at the same time, you were given a ‘new’ daughter in my place, but she became a murderous psychopath just like what River became after Demons Run.” I pause, suddenly realizing. “I suppose I chose two ways to change my life. Aside from giving myself a human life, I also gave myself a life with the Silence as my guardians. In other words, not only am I seeing what my life would’ve been like as an ordinary human, but I am also seeing what my life would’ve been like as a member of the Silence.” I gasp, shaking my head in shame. “Oh, God… Why would I do that? I couldn’t even imagine it before, but now…”

I involuntarily think back on my ‘fear’ self’s words: “There’s still time for you! You can still become this! They’ll never stop hunting you! You’ll have to stop running eventually! Everybody does! You can’t run forever!”

This gives me a sudden thought. “River said you failed to save me—her. Nova,” I say, turning to the Doctor with a frown. “How could you have failed? That should’ve been impossible.” What could possibly have happened to make him lose me so easily?

“You’re right,” he snaps suddenly, and I realize his snap is geared toward himself and not me. “It should have been impossible.” He stays silent for a minute before admitting in a regretful tone. “I did something stupid. No, I did something selfish. Something unforgivable. Something that I will never forgive myself for. I swore to myself that I would avoid confrontation, but… I was so angry for what they did to her! What they were turning her into! I couldn’t let them get away with what they were doing! I couldn’t control myself! I had to do what I did…at least at the time.” He then lowers his voice to a growl. “But it was all for nothing; they took her away anyway.”

“What did you do?” I ask nervously, feeling, deep down, like I already know the answer.

My father closes his eyes in regret before admitting shamefully, “I killed someone.”

“What?!” I exclaim in absolute shock. He actually killed someone?! How? Why?

“It wasn’t the first time I’ve done that,” he shrugs in response to my outburst. “I wiped out my own people—my entire home—to end the Last Great Time War.”

“No, I know that; you told me that story before. Who did you kill while trying to save me—Nova? Was it Madame Kovarian?”

“No, that was Nova,” he shakes his head. “She killed Madame Kovarian much later. I killed one of the soldiers. He taunted me.”

‘One of the soldiers?’ From that Silence ship, when he was trying to save me with my grandparents and the Paternoster Gang? That one soldier he encountered when he found out what the Silence were doing to me? The one he threatened to kill, at least in my world? He actually killed him this time round?

“So you shut him up by shooting him in the face?” I scoff in disbelief.

“Yes! That’s exactly what I did!”

“And you felt pleased with yourself shortly after?” I don’t realize this was a dumb question until after I’d asked it out loud. It’s absolutely insane! How could he? Why would he?

“YES!” the Doctor screams automatically before pausing and shaking his head with a groan. “I mean, no.” He stays silent for several seconds while burying his face in his hands before admitting with a heavy sigh, “Yes and no.”

“So you were pleased that you’d eliminated a Silence member as a way of getting back at them for what they did to me—Nova,” I say with a raised eyebrow. “But you were not pleased with what you did since it made—”

“It made me lose her,” he finishes with a shameful nod. “Exactly. If I hadn’t wasted all that time, I could’ve saved her without issue. But I was selfish. I decided to take revenge on my enemies once and for all, rather than focus on what was really important. I let my recklessness get the better of me, just like always. I will never forgive myself for that. Not even Amy and Rory will ever forgive me now…not after what I let happen to their granddaughter. Not even after what happened to River…” He chokes back a sob at the mere mention of River as he buries his face in his hands again. “This is what happens to people when they get too close to me. I end up ruining their lives in some form or another. Every single time. Rose… Martha… Donna… Amy… Rory… River… And now Nova. This is why I’m better left alone. I can’t hurt people as long as I’m alone.”

“You’re wrong,” I shake my head. The Doctor looks up at me in seeming offence, but I continue anyway. “That’s the literal last thing you should do—be alone, I mean. You’re not yourself when you’re alone. That’s why you need someone to travel with you. Someone who prevents you from making bad decisions. Someone who will always be there to love you and support you through your hardships. Someone who will always be there to remind you who you are…who you really are. Someone to tell you to never be cruel…to never be cowardly…to never give up…and to never give in. Someone to tell you who ‘The Doctor’ really is.” I pause to let my words sink into my father’s brain before I continue once more. “Nothing is ever truly impossible, even when things seem that way. There’s always a way, even when it’s one we haven’t thought of yet. A very wise old man recently taught me this. I bet you can guess who.” I say this last phrase while smiling at my father, and he smiles back once he’s realized who I’m referring to. “We will save your daughter. Together. I have a way.”

“How?” he asks, seeming doubtful.

I shrug like it should be obvious. “How else? With words. Another thing the wise old man taught me is that words always win wars. He even admitted that that was one of my greatest talents; that was something I ‘inherited’ from him. That was how I helped a young boy to conquer his fear of spiders. That was how I saved River when she was under mind-control. That was how I saved you when the Shadow Demons forced you into a coma. In the ‘dream,’ when you were about to set off the ‘galaxy-eater’ that would end the Time War, I told you that you weren’t alone and that I was there with you and would never leave you, and I proved it by placing my hand over yours in preparation to detonate the bomb with you. Thankfully we never had to actually set off the bomb, but just making physical contact with you was enough to wake you up and show you that you weren’t alone—that I was there for you and always would. I would never ever let you be alone, Dad. Not ever again. I promise. As I said, we will save your daughter together, and no matter what may happen, we will never give up. You may be tired of running, but in the whole time I’ve known you—the real you, I mean—one thing that’s absolutely certain about you is that you never give up, no matter what happens. You always keep trying, even at your last breath.” My words instantly make me remember the adventure he told me about, when he used his literal last breath to tell River (or rather, Melody) who she really was to him—how she wasn’t his killer but rather his lover. “Do for Nova what you did for River back in Berlin,” I add softly. “Teach her who she truly is to you and who she truly is to herself. Tell her how much you love her.”

“Sydney…” he sighs after a minute. “I really don’t think it’ll be that simple.”

“Trust me, it will work,” I say confidently. “I’ve done this exact thing before—uh, minus the ‘telling her I love her’ part; that would’ve been weird. That’s something you can do later when it’s the right time. Let me talk to her first. As I’ve said a million times now, I know her. She is me. I know who she’s supposed to be, deep down. I can use what I know to get close to her; convince her that her current life was never the life she was truly meant to have; show her who the real enemy is. Show her what her life was truly meant to be like. The life I described—that was the life that she was truly meant to have. Once I’ve explained everything properly, she has to change her mind, change her ways. But further most, she has to see that you were never truly the enemy; that you were meant to be a family. You were meant to be her father. Show her what it truly means to be her father, and she’ll come around. I guarantee it.”

Seeing that the Doctor still seems unsure about all of this, I add, “As River and I have said, you don’t have to believe me, but you should at least trust me. Please, Doctor. This may be the only way I can get home. The only way you can get your family back, including Amy and Rory. You’re not ‘The Doctor’ without your family. You need them to keep you on the right path. You need them to keep you running.” I remember him mentioning how he was tired of running, but, deep down as well as from past experience, I know his family are who keep him from getting tired and encourage him to do the right thing and to never give up, no matter the cost or how tired he gets. “You need all of us. Please, Dad…trust me.”

The Doctor spends several minutes contemplating my words before he reaches out and hugs me tightly, burying his face in my shoulder. “Thank you, Sydney,” he whispers tearfully. “That’s just what I needed to hear. You really do have a way with words…just like me.” He pauses once more before admitting, “You really are your father’s daughter.”

Wait… Did he just say what I think he just said?

I pull away from him and frown at him, unsure of whether he truly meant what I think he said. “You mean…you actually believe me? About me being your daughter, I mean?” Why else would he have said what he said?

He nods with genuine honesty. “Yes. I’m beginning to, at least. I’m starting to see traits in you that mirror my own. I see a lot of River in you as well. Your heart is very strong-willed, just like River’s, and you share my strong thirst for adventure and determination to do what’s right. Every single one of those traits are exactly what I always wanted my daughter to possess.”

“She does,” I nod vigorously. “Deep down, I think she does possess all of those traits. The problem is, they’re so deep within her that they are unable to be accessed because of everything the Silence put her through. What they made her become. Like I said, if we can get close to her—preferably alone—we can help her access those ‘traits’ and help her realize who she really is, who she’s supposed to be. I truly believe we can do it; we just have to get her alone somehow. Only then would she actually be willing to listen to us. Properly.”

“Getting her alone will be incredibly difficult,” the Doctor points out. “There’ll be Silence everywhere. We’ll have to keep them away from her long enough to be able to fully get through to her. Plus, the second they see me, they’ll shoot me on sight.”

“Not unless we shoot them first. You’d be surprised at how well I am with a gun. You’ll be surprised to know that in my world, River has taught me quite a lot of techniques outside of my normal college classes. I can eliminate over ten targets in under twenty seconds now; I’m that good. Would you rather you do the talking while I do the shooting?”

“I would rather we avoid violence entirely if possible, but if we must commit to it, then I would appreciate not being the one who shoots first. Certainly not at her.”

I shrug. “Like I said, I don’t mind if I’m the one who does all the shooting—when it’s necessary, of course—and you do all the talking. You know my story now. Our story. I would suggest that I still be the one who talks to her first, just to put her in a calmer and more peaceful mindset before you show yourself.”

“Yes, I’d have to agree with you there…regrettably so,” he nods before sighing sadly. “If only River was here… She’d know exactly what to say to her.”

“She would say exactly what I would say to her,” I say confidently. “Trust me, I know the perfect words to say to her. I’ve told them to her before, and they’ve worked.” Sort of, I add in my head, thinking back on when I faced off with my corrupt self during our ‘fear’ adventure.

“Are you absolutely sure this will work, Sydney?” my father asks hesitantly like he heard my thought anyway. Some things never change.

“It has to. Otherwise, she’ll never be who she was always meant to be. She’ll never learn to love again unless you show her love first. Show her who the real enemy is. Show her who her true family is.”

“You’re right,” he nods after a minute. “Her family was never with the Silence. Her family was always with me. With us—Amy, Rory, River, and me.”

I smile as I rise to my feet. “Let’s get your daughter back…together.” I then pause and add, thinking of my mother and her dying wish for us to save my corrupt self, “For River.”

For Mom.

“Yes,” my father smiles and agrees, rising to his feet with me. “For River.”

Chapter Text

After a several-minute-long strategy session, the Doctor uses his psychic link with his criminally insane daughter to find her location in Space-Time using the TARDIS’s telepathic circuits. At the same time, I prepare a big speech in my head (a similar one as the one I gave to my ‘fear’ self in Victorian London) that I hope would—properly this time—change her ways. It’s frightening that I have to face her again, but what makes the situation more frightening is the fact that this time I’m not dealing with another ‘fear’ projection; this time she’s the real deal, which makes her a gazillion times more deadly. That being said, I’m not sure whether or not I will survive this time. The only reason why I survived last time in Victorian London was because that version of me that I fought was much weaker than the version I’m dealing with here, which was incredibly lucky then. The fact that this version of me is much stronger than the former one I fought means that it will be an even bigger challenge to defeat her. Plus, she has an army to back her up this time around, while the Doctor and I only have each other, so the odds of us surviving this battle are slim to none.

What would happen if I do die in this world? Would that legitimately be the end for me, not just as ‘Sydney Marie Elise’ but also as ‘Nova Susan Song’; in other words, if I die in this world, would I die in my world as well? Or will I simply wake up back in my world, back into the life that is rightfully mine, and I get to walk away alive and unscathed (physically at least)? Once I go back to my world, and depending on what happens when we get to wherever and whenever we’re going, what will happen to Nova in this world? Once we finally get through to her—if we finally get through to her—would she finally accept the Doctor’s apology and see him as her true father again? Will they learn to trust each other again and begin traveling together, like she was always destined to do once I’m gone?

Or will she remain a psychopath and an enemy to her family for the rest of her days? How much stronger will she get, the longer she remains loyal to the Silence? How much farther will she be willing to go before anyone can stop her? What if she can’t be stopped? What if she’ll never be stopped?

All of these questions whiz through my head, one after the other, as I stare nervously at my mother’s gun lying on the chair as if taunting me to use it again. I originally volunteered to do most of the shooting while the Doctor did most of the talking, but now I am having second thoughts after thinking nonstop since the ‘abandoned factory’ incident when I involuntarily used the gun on my mother and killed her in the process, and I’m afraid that I’ll end up doing the exact same thing to the Doctor if I wielded it again.

I am also surprised that the Doctor chose to keep her gun even after her death, despite being against any kind of weaponry. Perhaps he’d chosen to keep it around because he imagined his wife to still be around in spirit as long as he kept her gun nearby; in other words, whenever he held the gun or simply stood close to it, he would imagine physically standing close to River, and he refused to let it go, which would result in letting her go as well. Of course, now, River’s gun is the only thing the Doctor has left of her, so it makes perfect sense that he would insist on keeping her gun around.

Then again, maybe the Doctor plans to use River’s gun to get back at the Silence for using her own gun on her in the same way; in which case, I don’t know what to feel about it. Sure, I want to see the Silence pay for everything they’ve done as much as he does, but I just can’t imagine seeing the Doctor—my father—physically do it. Sure, he slaughtered billions to end the Time War, and thankfully I wasn’t there to see it happen; but this time I will be there by his side, and I don’t know how I’m going to feel once I see him slaughter the entire Silence organization, including Nova, in the exact same way he destroyed Gallifrey—that is, if this is what he’s truly planning. Would he really be willing to wipe out the entire organization, including his own daughter?

“We’ve arrived,” the Doctor says, interrupting me from my thoughts, after the TARDIS seems to fall silent. He then turns to me and asks with a serious expression, “Are you sure you still want to do this, Sydney? It isn’t too late to change your mind.” He says this seemingly after having read my thoughts (again).

Also, I can’t help but notice that he seemed to have asked that question like he’s having second thoughts himself, which is completely understandable. What we’re about to do is incredibly risky, and I remember him specifically saying that he ‘didn’t want to be the one to shoot first,’ should worse come to worse, and I get the disturbing feeling like this may end up happening anyway, specifically with Nova as the primary target, and I’m pretty sure the Doctor won’t be at all prepared for that.

Even though I’m planning to get the Doctor and Nova to make peace with each other in order to get home back to my universe, I’m scared to find out what would happen if I failed. If the only way for me to go home is to bring the Doctor and Nova back together and I fail, would I be stuck here? Or is there another way for me to get home? What if it doesn’t matter whether I succeed or fail; I’ll be sent back home anyway? Either way, unlike the Doctor, I’m prepared to do whatever it takes to get home, even if it means I have to rid the universe of the Silence, including my evil twin, to do so. Of course, I’m going to go down the peaceful route, but if it comes down to it, I won’t hesitate to go down the more antagonistic route instead.

“Yes it is,” I declare with as much confidence as I could muster. “I made my decision long before we left the house. There’s no way I’m changing my mind. Not now that we’re here…wherever ‘here’ is.” I will find a way home back to my true family in one way or another.

“Alright then,” the Doctor says in a somewhat doubtful tone with a shrug. “I do hope you know what you’re doing.”

“Not really,” I admit with a regretful sigh. The Doctor frowns at me in response, and I shrug back, “But sometimes the only thing you can do is improvise.” I figure that if Nova accepting my speech doesn’t work, then I will just improvise from there and hope that nothing too bad happens.

“You know that doesn’t always work.”

I frown back at him incredulously. “It always works for you. Rather, it did work for you…once upon a time. Until…” I pause, thinking of the Ponds, River, the Doctor, and me, and how happy we all were together in my other life. “You can be like that again, you know,” I add in a hopeful tone.

The Doctor sighs again. “Sydney, as I said, I don’t think a simple improv will work in this scenario. She’s a lot more dangerous now than you realize.”

I shake my head before explaining. “I don’t mean about the ‘improv’ thing. I mean about you being back with your family. I mean about you being ‘The Doctor’ again. If we turn back now, you might never get that chance again. You may not have ever paid attention to this, but your friends and family are what make you who you are. Amy, Rory, River, even your past companions—they are who make you ‘The Doctor.’ Even if we have to do a little improv to get Nova to see you for who you truly are, then so be it; believe it or not, that was something you were really good at once upon a time, way before all of this. Once Nova sees who ‘The Doctor’ really is, she’ll have no choice but to come running back to you. Trust me.”

The Doctor pauses for a minute before smiling. “I do trust you, Sydney Marie Elise.”

However, I get the feeling that he’s lying. “You and I both know that’s a lie. ‘Rule One: The Doctor lies.’” I may no longer be telepathically linked to him, but I can tell that the Doctor doesn’t have near as much confidence as me, and both of our levels are extremely low. Plus, he still sees me as a stranger, despite having heard my entire life story.

However, he seems to believe otherwise. “I’m not lying,” he says, shaking his head. “I really mean it.”

“Prove it,” I say, still feeling skeptical.

“Alright,” he shrugs before he goes over to the chair, picks up River’s gun, and holds it up for me to see. “I’m taking this, and I’m keeping it,” he says as he slips it into his coat pocket. “You won’t be using it. I will.”

He really did hear my thoughts earlier. Of course he did. When doesn’t he?

“I thought we agreed that I was going to take it so you don’t have to,” I frown at him. “You said you didn’t want to be the one to shoot first.” In what way does him taking River’s gun prove that he trusts me?

He shrugs again before admitting, “Yeah, well I lied about that, didn’t I?”

So he is planning a revenge trip. Why else would he be taking River’s gun so willingly?

If this is true, that leaves a very important question: if he plans to take revenge on everyone, does that include his own daughter? If it really came down to it, would he actually shoot his own daughter? Would he even be able to live with it?

“I’m not proud of myself for agreeing to this,” he sighs as he walks back over to me and takes my hands in his own, “but I do trust that this is the best way to accomplish this, and I trust that you will turn my daughter back around, and you will do it successfully. But you can’t do this with the Silence creeping up on us; that’ll be my job. I’ll protect you to make sure the Silence don’t get to you while you’re talking. I’ll be close by, but it’s best that she doesn’t see me at all…at least until she’s actually back on our side.”

“And what if I fail?” I can’t help but ask anyway. “Would you actually be willing to do it?”

I seriously doubt that the Doctor would be willing to murder his own daughter for the good of the universe, just like he destroyed Gallifrey to end the Time War. He doesn’t seem to realize that by taking River’s gun, he’s basically signing Nova’s death certificate; not only that, but he is also signing on to be her executioner. I’m pretty sure that once he finds this out, he would refuse to do it immediately, but at the same time, admittedly, I can’t tell if he was truly lying about not wanting to shoot first, or if he took the gun because he’s realized that there is, in fact, no choice. Deep down, he knows that if worse comes to worse, one of us will have to pull the trigger, and he seems determined to take the burden of it off of my shoulders and claim it for himself. Again. So like him, I sigh to myself; though at the same time I still doubt he actually would. I don’t think River would approve of any of this either if she was here.

However, he seems highly confident in his decision, because he says as he closes his eyes in regret, “If it comes down to it… If it means the universe will be safe… Then yes. I would. Nothing is more important than doing what’s needed to keep the universe safe, no matter the cost.” He pauses for a few seconds before quoting, “‘Great men are forged in fire. It is the privilege of lesser men to light the flame. Whatever the cost.’ It’s something I have to remind myself from time to time.”

In other words, he is willing to do whatever it takes for the good of the universe, even if it means sacrificing his own daughter to do so.

However, I can’t help but admit, shaking my head, “That burden shouldn’t be only on your shoulders.”

He sighs before admitting himself, “No, but it’s what I choose. No one should ever have to suffer for my mistakes…certainly not Nova. Too many people have suffered because of me. No more. Nova’s suffering ends today. We will end it together. I want to end this for both of us, not just for River and Amy and Rory but for you as well. I am going to bring you home.”

His last statement makes me realize that he means ‘home’ as in to help me get back to my other life, and I can’t help but smile appreciatively at him. “That’s ‘The Doctor’ I know.” I then wrap my arms around him, hugging him tightly. “I’ve missed you so much,” I whisper in his ear. “I know I’ve said that already, but I just felt the need to remind you of that again.”

“I know,” he whispers back, leaning his head on top of mine, “and I greatly appreciate it.”

His words make me feel like he has missed his daughter just as much as I’ve missed him, but at the same time I still can’t help but be afraid of failing to save her and bring them back together. Of course, I don’t like the idea of killing ‘myself’ again, but I remind myself that I have a responsibility to do what’s needed for the universe (which is also something that the Doctor taught me in my other life), and if killing Nova is what is needed to be done, then so be it. Of course, I am hoping to avoid this, despite everything.

“We’ll be alright,” the Doctor smiles at me as he pulls away, apparently sensing my nervousness. “Everything is going to be fine. I promise.”

This is, of course, a lie, but at the same time I feel obligated to agree as, in my mother’s words, ‘it’s now or never.’ “Let’s go,” I say with a nod before heading toward the TARDIS’s exit doors, and the Doctor follows closely behind.

Thankfully we aren’t greeted with murderous guards but rather large crates filled with various forms of weaponry. Upon seeing this, we search around to make sure there aren’t any soldiers hiding behind them, and once we’re satisfied that we’re safe and alone (at least for the moment), the Doctor uses his TARDIS key to make the blue box invisible so nobody spots it when and if they enter this area. Then he uses his sonic screwdriver to unlock the storage room door, and we advance into the bowels of the Silence base, which is apparently different from the one where we rescued my guardians and Hazel in my other life; thankfully this one isn’t nearly as widespread as the other one, so we don’t have to walk as much.

The base also appears to be, surprisingly, deserted for some odd reason. I point this out, saying, “It’s a lot quieter than I expected.” I thought for sure that it would be a challenge to get around the base without being killed, with so many Silence members guarding the place, but strangely there seems to be little to no guards at all. This makes me wonder what happened to everyone. I immediately get the disturbing feeling that my evil twin was responsible for everyone’s mysterious disappearance; she may have slaughtered several members when she took Madame Kovarian’s place as their new leader, and most of the members disagreed with the way that she was running the place, and she either executed them as punishment or they simply fled. Either way, this shows how powerful my alternate self has become since joining these sickos, which disturbs me more, as I’m ninety-nine percent sure that this was what I would’ve become had my Doctor failed to save me in my other life.

“Yes, it is abnormally silent,” he nods in agreement, “if you’ll pardon the pun. Makes you wonder what happened here, eh?”

“What do you think happened here?” I ask, wondering if he has similar thoughts as me.

He shrugs. “I don’t know, but I highly doubt it was anything good.”

I scoff at this statement. “With these creeps, that’s usually the ca—”

“NOVA, LOOK OUT!” the Doctor exclaims out of the blue as he automatically wraps one arm around me and pulls me behind him, and uses his other hand to take out River’s gun from his coat pocket and shoot across the hallway at something in the darkness that I can’t see. He shoots at least five times until he eventually stops shooting and just stares at the gun as if wondering why he opened fire in the first place.

“What was that?” I demand as I squint through the darkness toward where he was aiming, but I don’t see anything as it’s too dark without my Time Lord night-vision.

“I…don’t know,” he frowns, puzzled, as he stares at River’s smoking gun. “I…must’ve seen something. I…don’t remember what I saw.” He keeps the gun trained toward the area as he says this, but his hand trembles slightly.

Deep down, I know exactly what he saw. I’m pretty sure he saw those creepy Silence creatures that are known to delete themselves from most memory, and there may have been a small group of them hiding nearby, and he was able to catch them before they had a chance to stop us. I squint in the darkness again, this time toward the floor, and see a person’s pinstriped leg sticking out from behind some crates. Feeling greatly disturbed, I say as I gently tug on my father’s arm, “Come on. Let’s keep moving. This place is giving me the creeps.” I look up at him and see his hand that still grips River’s gun shaking, like he can’t believe what he’d done. “Dad?” I say, tapping on his shoulder this time to get his attention.

“Right. Yes,” he says, shaking his head as if waking himself up from a trance. “You’re right. Let’s go.”

He lowers the gun to his side and begins walking, but he continues to grip me around my waist against him tightly, like the danger is still present. I point this out, saying in an awkward tone, “And you can let me go now.”

“Sorry,” he says as he quickly unravels his arm from me and pulls away, feeling as equally awkward.

“It’s okay,” I assure him, knowing that this is a typical instinctive response from him. I then pause, suddenly remembering a specific detail from earlier. “Also…I couldn’t help but notice that you called me ‘Nova’ before.” Was that said on instinct as well? Or did he mean to actually call me that?

“Did I?” he frowns. “When?”

“When you pulled me away before you shot at…whatever you were shooting at over there,” I reply.

“Oh…” he deepens his frown, feeling embarrassed. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to. I meant to call you ‘Sydney,’ since that’s obviously your name.”

A small part of me wants to correct him and say that ‘Nova’ is my true name, but I decide to refrain from saying that. Instead, I say with a shrug, “It’s fine. I’m pretty sure I called you ‘Dad’ again accidentally, so we’re even.” When I say this, I catch a brief glimpse of a subtle smile appear on the Doctor’s face, like he no longer seems to mind that I call him ‘Dad’ now, which admittedly still makes me slightly uncomfortable for obvious reasons. To avoid any more awkwardness, we both continue walking through the dark corridors in silence (pun not intended).

Several minutes later, we stop outside another dark room. “She’s in there,” the Doctor nods toward the ominous opening in the wall directly across from where we pause in our tracks. He then asks, glancing down to me, “Are you sure you want to do this alone? I know I said I didn’t want her to see me, but I highly insist on going in with you anyway. As I said, she’s a lot more powerful than you think.”

“And she’s a lot more dangerous than you think,” I reply. “She forced me to kill River without me even knowing I was doing it. I’m not about to let her force me to kill you as well. I have to do this alone.” I then say as I hold my hand out to him, “Give me the gun.”

“Sydney—” he shakes his head in an attempt to protest, but I interrupt him.

“If I am to do this alone—especially if it’s for the good of the universe—I need to be prepared for anything, even the worst-case scenario, no matter the cost. You taught me that.”

“No, Sydney,” the Doctor shakes his head again as he holds the side of his coat that holds River’s gun away from me. “I can’t let you do that.”

“Like it or not, one of us is going to have to pull the trigger if worse comes to worse,” I argue. “I’d rather it be me than you. You’ve had to deal with more than enough burdens on your shoulders in the last seven-hundred years. Let me take this one from you.”

“Sydney, please, don’t do this. Let me do this. This is no job for a child.”

I’m not a child, I think about saying but don’t. Instead, I shake my head, holding my hand out further, this time in a forceful manner, “This is the last time I’m going to ask nicely. Give me the gun.” If I had to fight him for the gun, then I would.

He pauses for a minute before he groans and reluctantly hands over his lover’s gun. “Please don’t do anything stupid in there,” he begs me.

“Only if you don’t do anything stupid in return,” I reply before I turn to head inside the room, only to be stopped half a second later.

“Wait!” the Doctor says, abruptly grabbing my arm and pulling me back around to face him.

I expect him to say something, but instead he does something unexpected. He pulls me toward him and kisses me on my forehead before he wraps his arms around me in a tight hug, even burying his face in my shoulder. “What was that for?” I frown at him once he pulls away half a minute later.

He pauses for a second before he says with a shrug, “Uh…for luck.”

“Okay…” I frown in response, highly doubting that his hug and kiss was just for luck. “Thanks.”

“Be careful,” he tells me, his old eyes filled with worry.

“You too,” I nod back. I love you; I want to say but don’t for the same obvious reasons as when I felt uncomfortable for him to be completely okay with me calling him ‘Dad.’ Putting all uncomfortableness aside, I take a deep breath as I enter the room.

Surprisingly, I find her standing at the far side of the room, facing the entryway as if waiting for me. I pause mid-stride in shock upon seeing her standing there like this.

Fudgeknuckle. Did I just blindly walk into a trap?

“Come to kill me, have you?” she automatically says in a knowing tone the instant I enter the room. That’s it. No ‘hello, how was your journey?’ Then again, I didn’t really expect her to care that much anyway.

I can’t help but sputter in response, “W-W-What? No. I… I’m not—”

“Don’t lie to me,” she rolls her eyes. “You wouldn’t have come in here with a gun if you weren’t. Her gun, no less.” She says the word ‘her’—referring to River—in disgust, like she can’t believe that I would try to use the same gun on her like she made me use it on River at the factory. Girl, you have no idea how much I want to use this thing on you, I think back in my head, desperately wanting to make her pay for making me kill our—my—mother.

However, I have to force myself to remain calm, knowing that I have a more important mission, that being to make peace with her, even despite all of the dark deeds she has done. “No, I don’t want to kill you,” I say, shaking my head and making it sound like I am telling the truth, even though a large part of me wants to disagree.

“Then why did you bring a gun?”

“I came here expecting a fight,” I say honestly, “even looking for one at one point, but I don’t want to fight you. I came here to talk.” Again, I make it sound like the truth, even though deep down it is far from it, and she knows it.

She sighs in response. “If you came here to try to talk me into changing my ways, you’re wasting your breath—again. As I’ve told you time and time again, nothing and no one can change me. Not even Regeneration, and certainly not the Doctor.” Again, she says his title in disgust. “I know he’s here with you. No doubt he sent you in here to ‘talk’ to me.” She says the word ‘talk’ like she truly knows that I’m here for something much more cataclysmic.

However, I decide to throw her off a little bit. “Actually, I sent myself in here to talk to you. I just used him as my Uber driver to get me here.”

“You and I both know that’s a lie,” she snorts. “You and I both know he’s here for something far greater than as your simple taxi service.”

“Of course,” I say. “He’s here to make things right with you. Apologize for what he let happen to you.”

“Exactly!” she snaps back. “He intentionally let it happen! Because of him, I became this!”

“No!” I shake my head. “It wasn’t intentional. He didn’t mean for this to happen.”

“Really?” she says, raising her voice so the Doctor can hear her from the hallway. “Then why doesn’t he prove it? Why doesn’t he come out and face me himself, rather than send you in here to talk to me for him?”

“Because you wouldn’t listen to him until you listened to me first,” I say honestly. “He doesn’t know you as well as I do…at least until I told him my entire life story. Our story.”

She scoffs at this. “‘Our story?’ You honestly believe that we’re the same person? You honestly believe that I would live such a primitive life?”

“I don’t have to believe it,” I admit. “I’ve already lived it, as you; rather, you as me. Please, believe me when I say that your life was never meant to be like this, whatever ‘this’ is.” I gesture around the Silence base, around this ‘world.’ “You were meant to live a much better life than this. A safer life. The Doctor had meant for you to have that life; River too. They never meant for you to have this life. This was never supposed to happen. Please, let me help you. Let me fix this. We can fix it together. The Doctor can help you as well if you just let him. That’s all he’s ever wanted to do for you. To help you.”

“No!” she snaps again. “I don’t want his help! In fact, I don’t want anything from him besides his death! His death is the only thing that matters! Kovarian had meant for me to see it through! I promised her!”

“Yeah, well obviously you broke that promise because she’s not here!” I point out. “You killed her!”

“I had to! Wanna know why? Because she could never be proud for anything I do! No matter what I did for her, it was never enough! And every time I would fail her, she would punish me! She would beat me, or order someone else to beat me for her. It’s not difficult to guess who was responsible for that.”

I shake my head in utter disbelief. “No, it wasn’t the Doctor’s fault. He would never have allowed that to happen to you or to anyone.”

“No, no, no, you don’t understand,” Nova shakes her head, this time with a smirk. “I don’t blame him for what’s happened to me… I am thanking him.”

“What?” I frown, now legitimately confused.

“You see,” she explains as she begins walking back-and-forth, “every time Kovarian would beat me, she would make me stronger. Of course, I had a little help from my Regeneration Energy as well; another little something I inherited from my old man. Kovarian would beat me almost to the point of death, then I would use my Regeneration Energy to heal myself; and every time I would use my Energy on myself, it would make me physically stronger and more powerful. From these episodes, it made me realize how truly powerful my Energy was; how powerful it made me. With this energy, I was basically a God. I am a God.”

I shrug. “And so, what, you proved your ‘godliness’ by killing Kovarian as well as the majority of her followers?”

“Exactly! But I wanted to be something more than what Kovarian was turning me into. She wanted to turn me into a weapon, but I wanted to be something more than just a weapon. I wanted people to fear me for my powers. I wanted them to see how powerful I truly was and kneel down at my feet. Kovarian refused to kneel, and so I killed her, and I don’t regret it one bit. How is that for pride since no one else was going to be proud of me?”

“Only a monster would be proud of the things you’ve done!” the Doctor snaps as he comes stomping into the room in full ‘Oncoming Storm’ mode.

“Dad!” I gasp, startled at his sudden presence. “What’re you doing?” So much for that promise to not do anything stupid.

“Ah, so now you finally decide to come out and face me, huh?” his deranged daughter smirks at him. “It’s about time, old man.”

“That’s why Kovarian was never truly proud of you!” he continues in anger like she hadn’t said anything at all. “You’ve turned into an even bigger monster than she ever was! She made an even bigger monster out of you, and that was her biggest mistake!”

“Not as big of a mistake as it was for you to abandon me with her!” she snaps back at him. “If you and River hadn’t abandoned me, I wouldn’t have become this!”

“I’m sorry!” he protests. “I didn’t mean to, but I didn’t have a choice! After they took you away, I couldn’t come after you! I tried; really, I did! But there was nothing I could do to save you!”

Nova shrugs at this. “It hardly matters now. I hated you both for a long time, but later I realized something extraordinary, and I began to think differently. You left me to suffer at Kovarian’s hands for my whole life; as I was saying to your new friend here, Kovarian beat me almost to the point of death. But when my Regeneration Energy kicked in, I realized that you’d given me an extraordinary gift—one that would make me more powerful than anyone in existence. Kovarian wanted to make me into a weapon, but I realized that I was already a weapon; I was born as a weapon. My Regeneration Energy was the weapon, which I inherited from you. Kovarian didn’t make me this way. You did.”

“No!” the Doctor shakes his head. “I never meant for you to become this! This was not how your powers were meant to be used; they were meant to be used for the better. For good! Please, Nova, let me help you to be the good person you were meant to be.”

“This isn’t you, Nova!” I say, automatically quoting myself from my other life. “You’re so much better than this! Please, wake up from this delusion and come back to the Light! There is good in you, I know it!”

“Let us help you to be good again!” the Doctor adds. “Let us help you to find yourself again!” His statement makes me think of the same words that River said to him just before she died.

“It’s too late for that,” Nova shakes her head, truly meaning what she’s saying. “You can’t help me now. No one can help me now. The only way you can help me is by joining River in death! Once you both are dead, only then would I be truly happy, and so will the rest of the universe!”

I sigh, realizing that this is getting pointless. It seems like no matter what we say, no matter how hard we try to change her mind, she refuses to change, and honestly I don’t think she will ever be the person we want her to be. She’s too far over the side of the Dark that there’s no chance that she will ever see the Light. Not anymore.

The Doctor must see it too, because he gives a deep sigh and closes his eyes in seeming defeat, and when he opens them again, there is a darkness in them that was never there before, which frightens me to my core.

“Fine!” he growls under his breath before he automatically snatches River’s gun out of my hand and aims it at his daughter’s chest.

“Hey!” I gasp in absolute shock, backing up against a desk in horror. “Dad! What the hell?!”

“We both agreed that you always have to do what’s best for the universe, no matter the cost,” he says to me while refusing to turn his eyes away from his corrupted daughter. “You said yourself that I was the one who taught you that, did you not?”

I shake my head in utter disbelief. “Yeah, but… No! This isn’t—” I pause mid-sentence when I see my evil twin sniggering loudly. I frown at her in response.

“Wow!” she continues chuckling, like this is all a joke to her. “This is spectacular! The man who calls himself a pacifist is pointing a gun at me! You and ‘Mummy’ were always full of surprises.”

“We’ve been around…” the Doctor replies, raising an eyebrow, “much longer than most people, even you.”

“Obviously,” she snorts at his redundant statement. She then steps forward until River’s gun is pressed right between her hearts, glaring spitefully at her father as if daring him. “Which bears the question… Do you really have the balls to shoot me? Me—your only daughter?”

“If that’s what it takes to keep the universe safe, then yes,” he replies, and he seems to truly mean it. “And no, you’re not my daughter. Not anymore. My daughter is gone. I see that now.” After he admits this last bit, I catch a glint of a tear in his eye and a slight whimper to his voice, clearly angered to have lost his only daughter to such a callous group of people. In all honesty, I can’t help but feel the same way. I never thought I would become somebody like this, but I guess it was always destined to happen in one universe or another. I’m just thankful it didn’t happen in my own.

“And what if you’re wrong?” she snorts again. “About that, at least. Coz technically, we share the same blood, which biologically makes me your daughter; nothing can change that. But do you know the one thing you are wrong about? Deep down, you don’t have the balls to shoot me. In fact, you don’t have the capability to sacrifice those you love, even for the good of the universe.”

As they continue talking to each other, I secretly take the small pistol that I saw lying innocently on the desk; Nova must’ve planned to use it before we came in here but then (luckily for me) forgot about it. Thankfully they don’t notice as I check to make sure it’s already loaded before I arm it behind my back, ready to use at a moment’s notice.

The Doctor shakes his head, still focusing on his psychopath of a daughter. “You’re wrong. I’ve done worse things than you can imagine. I’ve wiped out whole worlds to save others. During the Time War, I had no other choice.”

“But here, you do have a choice,” she points out before glancing at me and saying, “Sydney knows it; I can see it in her eyes.” She then glances back at the Doctor (thankfully she’s not on to me about my secret plan) and continues, “You can walk away from this. All of this.” She pauses for a second as if reading his thoughts. “But if you do, it will mean losing me forever. If you walk away now, you will have failed me, you will have failed your best friends… But most of all, you will have failed your lover. River… She asked you to save me with her dying breath, but you just admitted to me that you failed to save me yourself, and you meant it. You promised her that you would save me, even back when I was just born, and you broke that promise—twice. And she’s not the first person you’ve broken a promise to either; you’ve broken several people’s promises, and most, if not all of them, have died because of it. Because of you. You are a disgrace to your family, to me, to the rest of the universe, and even to yourself.” She stops talking to allow her words to sink into the Doctor’s brain.

Once the words fully sink into his brain, he sighs in defeat and admits with a heavy sigh and heavy hearts while also lowering River’s gun to his side once more, “You’re right. I am a disgrace to everyone, especially to myself. A man like that should not deserve to live.”

I catch a subtle smile appear on Nova’s face, like she had been waiting for her father to admit those words for a very long time. Like she had been waiting for him to accept defeat for the first time in his twelve centuries long life. Like she had been waiting for him to accept the fact that she had finally won over him. “In that case,” she shrugs, her smirk widening as she inserts her hand into her right pocket, “allow me to put things right.” She then takes out a knife with lightning-speed and lunges at her father with it, aiming for his chest.

“NO!” I scream on instinct as I aim my gun at my alternate evil self and shoot her in the chest. I watch as she screams in pain and stumbles back and doubles over while wrapping her arms around her bloody front. I stare in shock as, a few seconds later, that golden glow I know all too well appears from her hands.

“Oh, sister…” she chuckles at me as the Regeneration Energy intensifies. “You’ve just made the biggest mistake of your life. Didn’t you pay attention? Every time anyone ‘kills’ me, I grow more powerful; Kovarian made sure I would with her experiments. Don’t you remember what I said before? She made me into a weapon. She planned for this very moment! By ‘killing’ me, you just killed yourself as well!”

“No!” I snap back as I aim at her chest again, prepared to take that second and final shot that would kill a Time Lord outright. “I’ll stop you!”

“Too late!” she shakes her head. “I am unstoppable now! I am inevitable!”

In that moment, she swings her head back and her arms out as she releases a powerful burst of Regeneration Energy that seems to hold the same amount of power as a nuclear blast. The force knocks me back into the desk, making me drop the gun. As I attempt to pick it back up, another gunshot is heard from the opposite side of the room, and the Regeneration seems to abruptly end, followed by my evil twin’s body falling to the floor in a heap.

Once everything settles and my vision clears, I glance toward the Doctor to see him having also been blasted back several feet across the floor from his daughter’s destructive Regeneration. I see him with his arm lifted, holding his wife’s smoking gun up, showing that he was the one who took that final shot at his daughter, before involuntarily dropping it by his side and lying back out of weakness.

“Dad!” I scream as I automatically run to him. I drop to his side and gasp once more the instant I see Nova’s knife sticking out of one side of his chest, right through one of his hearts, and staining his entire front, including his coat, with bright orange/red blood.

Chapter Text

“Oh my god!” I gasp at the grisly injury before immediately wrapping my fingers around the hilt of the knife in preparation to pull it out of his chest.

“No…” my father protests weakly while wincing in intense pain. “Don’t touch it. Leave it alone…”

“I can’t! It has to be pulled out!” I gently press down on his chest around where he was impaled to make it easier to pull the knife out.

“Sydney…leave it,” he protests once more. “I’ll just…bleed out faster if it’s pulled out. Plus, I don’t…want you to get cut.”

I shake my head, careless about my own safety. “Fine! Then we’ll pull it out once we get back to the TARDIS! Surely she can help you! I know she can!”

“I’m sorry…Sydney,” he shakes his own head, sweat beading on his brow and blood staining his jaw. “There’s…nothing you or the TARDIS can do for me. There is no cure.”

“What do you mean, ‘there is no cure?’” I frown, confused. “Anything can cure a stab wound!”

“Not this one… Not if it’s laced with Judas Tree poison…”

I gasp in disbelief. The Poison of the Judas Tree… The most incurable poison in the universe, and the strongest to even disable a Time Lord’s power of Regeneration. Nova must’ve coated the knife’s blade with the stuff, knowing that if the stab wound wasn’t going to kill the Doctor first, then the poison surely would. She got the last laugh. This was her ultimate goal all along, just like Mom when she was still a psychopath and used the same poison, but back then it was with a kiss instead of a knife.

My mother’s words from that very moment from my father’s memory echo in my mind: “It was never going to be a gun for you, Doctor. ‘The man of peace,’ who understands every kind of warfare except, perhaps, the cruelest.”

God, why didn’t I shoot her at the very beginning?

“Feels like a triple dose this time…” the Doctor grunts between breaths, “which means it will kill me three times as fast…which means I’ve got only a few minutes left to live. Less than five… Probably got…about three left at this point…”

“No, no, no, you can’t die!” I begin sobbing, thinking back to my first adventure with him, when he was bludgeoned to death by the pirates and how powerless I felt when I had to watch him die without being able to help him, much like how I feel right now. “Not this time! I won’t let you! There has to be a cure; one that hasn’t been invented yet, but maybe it has in the future! If we travelled there—”

“Nova…” he sighs sadly as he takes my hand in his own. “It’s too late. As I said, I’ve only got…a couple of minutes left to live. That’s not enough time. I’m afraid…I’m out of time.”

“No!” I snap. “Don’t say that! Of course you’re not—” I then pause, suddenly realizing something.

Wait… Did he really just call me that?

“What is it?” my father questions me in puzzlement, clearly having not paid attention to what he said; specifically, the name he called me.

“You…” I pause again, hesitant to admit it, but I ultimately decide to admit it anyway. “You just called me ‘Nova’ again.” I didn’t expect him to call me by that name at all, especially after the original Nova had killed him without the slightest bit of mercy. “You didn’t mean to call me that again…did you?” I ask him. He certainly didn’t mean to call me by that name last time when we first arrived here (he admitted that he didn’t…unless that was a lie), but perhaps he legitimately did this time.

“Perhaps I did…” he admits with a smile after seemingly having read my thoughts, “this time…”

“Why?” I ask, sensing that he is, for once, telling the truth.

He shrugs like it should be obvious. “Because you are Nova; are you not? You told me so yourself…”

“Yeah, but you didn’t fully believe me,” I frown in reply.

“Maybe not then…but I do now. I can see it in you. I can sense it. You are the true daughter I’ve always wanted. That we have always wanted—River and me. If only River had seen it too, before she…” He pauses, again refusing to say the ‘D’ word.

I shake my head. “No, she has seen it. I told her the same things I told you. The exact same things. Before I even finished telling my story, she saw me for who I truly was—that I was her true daughter.” I then pause, remembering River calling me ‘Nova’ in the arcade parking lot, and continue. “Actually, she saw me as her true daughter long before I told her my story, back in the parking lot at the arcade. You weren’t there, but she called me ‘Nova’ then and meant it. She told me she did. She saw who I truly was from the very beginning. That’s why she wanted you to help me, and to help yourself see me too. The real me. Not…‘this’ me.”

“I understand…” he nods. “And I’m sorry I didn’t believe you sooner. I wanted to…but I was too focused on Nov—” He abruptly pauses and glances shamefully at his daughter’s lifeless form lying on the opposite side of the room before continuing without using her proper name, “—on her, hoping I could save her… But I see now that there was no saving her… Not ever. All this time I should’ve been focusing on saving you instead. Help you to get back to your world… I’m so sorry, Sydney… You have to wake up… You have to wake up now… Come on… Wake up…” The moment he begins telling me to wake up, his facial expression seems to drop to a deadpan one, like he’d just entered some sort of trance, and his eyes begin closing, like he’s gradually losing consciousness.

I frown at him, confused as to why he’s talking in this way, while shaking him slightly to keep him awake. “Dad? What’re you saying? What do you mean, I have to wake up? I’m already awake…aren’t I?”

Then again…what if I’m not? What if I’ve never been awake in the whole time I’ve been in this ‘world?’

I frown again, my senses seeming to change in a very unnatural way. “Are you…are you saying this was never a simulated reality I created, but rather a dream? In real life I’m stuck in a coma? Is that what you’re saying?”

That’s when I begin remembering things. Strange things:

An outdoor marketplace filled with otherworldly beings…

An antique store that’s run by a shopkeeper that’s not really a shopkeeper…

Being locked inside the antique store against my will by the ‘not-really-a-shopkeeper’ after having discovered my being a Time Lord…

As all of these new (rather, old) memories pop into my head, my father continues to ramble seemingly incoherently as if an outside force is speaking through him, “Nova… Please… Hear me. Hear me and wake up… Wake up…” before taking one final exhale and falling silent.

However, I ignore him as all of these memories combine into one giant memory in my head, and it flashes behind my closed eyelids.

“I remember…” I mutter to myself as I begin to feel myself falling into the memory.

#####

I remember my father taking me to a planet, called Vintosis, with an outdoor marketplace where he allowed me to wander around alone since it was a very small area. We agreed that we needed a short break from training, so we decided to travel somewhere peaceful and be normal tourists for a while (or at least until things got hectic). While I was wandering around the tight alley that was filled with stalls and booths that were each run by various humanoid locals, I was offered by several of them to check out and buy the goods that they were selling, and I politely declined. However, one shopkeeper in particular was very persistent towards me, and even though it was a little unnerving to me, I remained polite about it and agreed to enter the shop for a short browse but did not plan to buy anything, while my father was busy conversing with some of the other locals across the way.

“So, where are you from?” the shopkeeper, who appeared to be a humanoid man in his late eighties, spoke up while I was browsing the various antiques on display. “I’ve never seen you around here before.”

“I’m not from around here, no,” I smiled politely. “In fact I’m not even from this planet. I’m just passing through with my dad. We thought we’d come here for a break from…work stuff. He’s the one who suggested this place; he’s been here multiple times.”

“Ah, perhaps I might know him,” the man nodded. “What is his name?”

I paused, not wanting to use my father’s title, thinking it’d be safer not to just in case, as I was getting sketchy vibes from this guy without really knowing why. “Uh…John Smith. Or maybe he introduced himself as a doctor, but his real name is John Smith. Dr. John Smith.” This last statement was a lie, of course.

The shopkeeper nodded again. “Ah, a doctor. I was a doctor many years ago…until I retired. I didn’t retire by choice, mind you. I was forced out of business.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” I said sympathetically. “I imagine how rough it must’ve been to be laid off like that.” Perhaps he got this job after he was forced to quit his medical job, I thought. Though, at the same time, being his current age, I would’ve thought he’d just retired right there and then, the moment he got laid off; then again, maybe that was several years ago for him.

“I suppose you could say that,” he shrugged like that wasn’t entirely true but decided to go along with it anyway, which was a little strange to me, but I ignore the feeling. He then smiled at me with a toothless grin that sent chills through my spine, “Imagine how you’d feel if you could go back in time and change that.”

This statement made me frown, feeling like he somehow knew about the TARDIS, but I tried to remain chill. “You mean, like, change the past? Like, prevent yourself from being laid off from your job?”

He nodded. “Exactly! Imagine if you could go back in time and change a certain event in your life where it never even happened? Imagine if you could change a decision that you made in your life that you regretted making in the first place? Imagine if you made a different decision than the one you made before, and it changes your life for the better?”

‘So you want to change your past?’ I thought but didn’t say out loud, which, in theory, is entirely possible with a TARDIS, but not ideal since it’s extremely dangerous. In any case, it sounded like that was what the shopkeeper was thinking of doing, assuming he, indeed, knew about the TARDIS, and therefore knew what I was, hence why he was specifically suggesting the idea to me.

This, of course, made me feel immensely awkward. “Oh, uh… I don’t know,” I stuttered. “That sounds like wishful thinking to me. One thing my dad taught me is that you can’t change the past, whether you have a time-machine or not.” I then paused and added quickly in an attempt to throw him off, “Uh, not that time-machines actually exist, but theoretically, if they existed, it’s not recommended. There are certain events that are fixed; in other words they can’t be changed, or all of history could change, including your own. Where I come from, we call that ‘The Butterfly Effect.’”

“Of course I’m familiar with the ‘Butterfly Effect,’” the man said, deepening his brow, “but what if you could change your life without breaking history?” From his tone of voice, it sounded like he was, indeed, on to me, which sent creepy vibes up my spine.

However, I continued to keep my cool.

“I-I-Is that even possible?” I stuttered, pretending like I didn’t understand what he was talking about. Sure, it was possible, but again, it was exceedingly risky. Then again, maybe he was fully aware of that fact.

“In my younger years as a doctor,” the man explained as he walked around the counter toward me, “I studied ways to make it possible. Using advanced technology from my world, one would enter a coma-like state and relive a moment in their lives and have the opportunity to change said moment to see what could’ve been.”

I raised a quizzical eyebrow at him. “You mean, like, see alternate futures of what their lives would’ve looked like, had they made a different decision, or if someone else impacted their lives differently, or whatever?”

He nodded again, this time seeming highly impressed. “Exactly! Your comprehension is quite extensive for a young lady your age.”

“I was a very studious kid growing up,” I replied with a casual shrug, despite the voices in my head telling me to get out of the store and never come back.

“Or perhaps it all just comes naturally to you because of your historical background,” he said, raising a knowing eyebrow, which indicated that he, indeed, knew (or at least seemed to know) who and what I was.

At this point, I was getting extremely weirded out by this guy, and so decided to take my leave quickly. “Uh…yeah. I guess,” I said as I slowly backed away toward the exit of the shop. “Anyway, I should probably get back to my dad; he might be looking for me. It was wonderful meeting you. Have a nice day.” The moment I turned to leave, I heard a swift clicking sound from the door, specifically from the door locking. I tugged on the door handle, but it was stuck in place. It was definitely locked, and it had been locked from the inside mechanically.

Okay, now things were getting creepier. I could tell, because I could feel my senses of danger heightening by the thousands. This guy definitely knew who, and even what, I was; he wouldn’t have locked me inside if he didn’t.

“I’m sorry, young lady,” the man said in a low voice that didn’t sound so friendly anymore, “but I’m afraid I can’t let you leave quite yet. You still haven’t seen my latest work. Besides which, if you walk away now, you’ll be missing out on a grand opportunity. Surely, there’s at least one time in your life that you wish you could change. Imagine if you could actually change it. It is entirely possible. I can show you right now.”

“Thanks, but I’m really not interested,” I said as I continued to tug on the door, but it refused to budge. “I should really get back to my dad.” I looked through the windows to see if I could get someone’s attention and alert them of my situation, but they carried on walking past, completely unknowing or uncaring of my safety. Not even my father was anywhere to be seen. Surely he must’ve sensed me in danger, right?

The shopkeeper’s next few words felt like a giant bomb having been dropped directly on top of the store; though at the same time, I sensed it coming the moment he began talking about the topic of changing history. “I’m afraid that’s no longer an option for you…Time Lord.”

However, I paused and attempted (very poorly) to play dumb. “I don’t…know what you’re talking about…”

“Don’t play that game with me. You know exactly what you are. I’ve installed a DNA scanner above the doorframe that scans everyone who comes in the shop,” he shrugged. “It automatically tells me what species they are.” He then smirked at me while approaching me with nefarious intentions for me. “Although for you, it had a bit of a challenge determining your exact species. It came up as ‘human’ for a while until it ultimately settled on a mix of ‘human’ and ‘unknown.’ However, with a bit more research, I eventually narrowed it down to ‘Time Lord,’ which should be impossible, yet here you stand. And the way you talked about the ‘theory’ of time-travel and your father being ‘a doctor’ were dead giveaways. People just never think before they speak anymore.” He began sniggering at me as I attempted to unlock the door with my sonic screwdriver, but even that refused to work for some reason. He revealed the reason by saying with a chuckle, “Don’t bother trying to unlock that door. It’s triple-deadlocked. No one can see you waving either. I’ve tinted the windows from outside and muted all sounds. I’m afraid you’re not getting out until I let you out.”

At this point, I had pretty much given up trying to unlock the door. I reluctantly turned back to the shopkeeper—if he was even a true shopkeeper—and glared daggers at him as he came closer to me. “What do you want with me?” I spat at him. “You’re not just offering me the chance to legitimately change my life, however that’s possible. What are you really after?”

“I want your lives,” he replied. “All of them.”

I frowned. “What? Why?”

“I’m an old man now,” He said in a tone like it should’ve been obvious, “and unfortunately I can’t ‘regenerate’ like you can. That’s what makes you perfect. You can help me.”

“To do what?” I snapped back.

“By giving me back my life. No living creature can live longer than a Time Lord, especially one starting out so young. There are so many years I can gain from you. I can gain back all of my years and remain young for centuries, maybe even millennia, with your energy.”

“You mean steal my life from me?” I scoffed. “What makes you think I will let you do that?”

The creepy old man sniggered again before saying, “Oh, you won’t have to ‘let’ me do anything. I’ll be taking those years from you…one way or another.”

In that moment, before I had any chance to react, the man took out a small syringe from his pocket and plunged it into the side of my neck, and I immediately passed out. The last thing I remembered was seeing my entire life—from the moment I regenerated for the first time to my latest adventure with the Doctor—flash before my eyes before waking up back in my guardians’ house in this ‘fake’ world.

#####

“I remember!” I gasp, returning to the present. “I remember everything! We were on a trip together… We were taking a break from my training… I went into this shop… I was offered by a man to ‘change my life’… He stole my life! He’s still stealing my life, the longer I stay here! He’s draining me of my life! That’s why I have to wake up! He tricked me, and now I’m stuck here!”

I pause and glance down at the Doctor, who lays on the bloodstained floor, lifeless, his emerald eyes closed and mouth slightly open as if in mid-sentence. He doesn’t appear to be breathing, which automatically makes me fear the worst. I place my fingertips against the side of his neck, but I feel no pulse, which could mean only one thing.

He’s dead. The Doctor, my beloved father, is dead. Nova succeeded in her mission, which means the Silence have won, which also means I’ve failed. I was supposed to protect him; that was why I insisted on taking the gun instead of him. I should’ve taken the shot at the very beginning, from the moment I first entered the room, then he wouldn’t have been stabbed. Now he’s dead, all because I wasn’t fast enough to stop her. To save him.

“No!” I sob uncontrollably, cradling his body and burying my face in his chest, ignoring the blood soaking his clothing and knife protruding from his left heart. “No, come back! You can’t die! You have to help me! I have to wake up, but I don’t know how! Please, Dad, you have to help me! Help me, please!”

He was supposed to get me home. He promised. Now he’s dead, which means I’m stuck here. I’m stuck here in this hellish ‘Limbo’ world forever, and there’s nothing I can do about it. Not ever again. Both of my parents are dead, and my guardians may as well be too since they technically shouldn’t be alive anyway since they both died trying to save me in my other life, which means that I am alone. I don’t think I can live in a world without them—my true parents, The Doctor and River Song.

Even if I moved back in with my guardians and began a new life here, it wouldn’t be the same as my other life. I preferred my other life, even when it wasn’t the ‘normal’ life I wanted as a non-human. Before all of this happened, I was starting to get more accustomed to my Time Lord life; more than that, I was starting to accept it, but now there’s no hope for me to gain back that life, possibly ever. The Doctor was supposed to help me gain back that other life, but now he’s dead, and there’s no way for me to bring him back to life. I am no longer a Time Lord, and I—we—killed the only other person who could’ve been able to save him, but we didn’t have a choice. Any and all hope of bringing him back is gone, as is any and all hope for me to return home to my world.

“Wake up…”

That’s when I hear it. A voice, like an echo in the far-off distance.

And, strangely enough, it’s the voice of my father.

But that’s impossible, I think to myself. My father is dead. I know, because I am literally staring down at him, and he hasn’t moved, absolutely no signs of life whatsoever. So if it’s not my real father…

“Wake up…” the voice whispers again a little clearer.

…then who, or what, is that? Could that be his ghost, perhaps, calling out to me from the spiritual realm? Or is it someone or something else entirely, pretending to be him? Could it actually be some trick that the sketchy man from the shop is playing on me?

I can’t help but call back to the mysterious voice, “Dad? Is that you?” Maybe it really is him, calling out to me, not from the afterlife but rather from my other world. Perhaps I’m not entirely stuck here, after all. Perhaps there really is a chance for me to return to the Waking World, back to my true family.

“Nova…” the Doctor’s voice whispers once more, this time sounding like he is standing right behind me. “I know you can hear me… This world you’re living in, it isn’t real. The longer you stay in it—the longer you believe it’s real—the more it drains your life-force… You have to wake up…”

“I can’t!” I whimper while clinging to my dead father’s body tighter, refusing to let him go. “I don’t know how! Please help me!”

“I am trying to help you…” the voice replies in a sigh, “but you must find the strength to wake up on your own. I can’t wake you up… You must wake yourself up...”

“I don’t know how!” I repeat, sobbing harder into his unmoving chest.

“Focus on me… Don’t think about anything else… Only focus on me… Focus on my voice… Reach out to it with your mind… Use our psychic link… You know how to do that… you’ve done it many times before…”

I sigh in relief, a small part of me believing that the voice is truly my father’s from my world, but a larger part of me still isn’t very sure. “I don’t…I don’t think I can,” I stammer. “He may not let me.” For all I know, the man who put me in this world may be much stronger than me or anyone else. How would I be able to fight him?

“You’re stronger than him…” my father says, clearly reading my thoughts. “Your mind is stronger than his… No mind is stronger than a Time Lord’s… Use that clever Time Lord brain of yours and fight him… Fight back… You can do it… Come on, Nova… Beat him… Beat him and wake up!”

At this, I squeeze my eyes shut while squeezing my dead father’s body tightly to me, using his body like a lifeline to pull me back to my living father in the Waking World. “I can do this…” I mutter to myself. “I can do this… I can do this… Come on, Nova, you can do this. Wake up. Wake up! WAKE UP!”

At that final ‘wake up,’ I finally manage to literally awaken from my apparent coma in a dim room that looks like a storage room in a basement or bunker. Thankfully, the first face I wake up to is my father’s, smiling down at me and wearing his typical tan tweed jacket instead of the dark-green coat he wore in my ‘dream’ world. I automatically sit up straight, almost knocking him into his forehead, but thankfully he dodges out of the way in time.

“Whoa!” he chuckles. “Easy there, Nova! You’ll give yourself whiplash! And you very nearly gave me a concussion!”

“Dad!” I exclaim, relieved to see him alive and well and without a scratch.

“Good morning, sweetheart. Or ‘good afternoon,’ I should sa—”

I interrupt him mid-sentence when I automatically wrap my arms around him in a tight hug, refusing to let him go once again.

“Well,” he chuckles again as he awkwardly returns the hug, “someone’s excited to see me. A little too excited, it seems. Missed me that much, have you?”

“Something like that,” I mumble in a barely audible tone, before adding in my head. So much has changed, including—

“Fudgeknuckle!” I gasp before immediately pulling away from him and checking my entire body to make sure I have my proper Time Lord body back. I pet my head to confirm that I have my large halo of curls that mirror my mother’s (Check!), press my hands against both sides of my chest to confirm there being a double-heartbeat (Check!), and finally attempt to conjure up a small amount of Regeneration Energy from both of my hands (Check!). “Thank God,” I sigh in relief, grateful to be back in my proper Time Lord body again.

“I take it I’ve missed out on a lot,” Dad says slowly, frowning at my seemingly strange behavior, like he’s wondering why I seem to believe that I’ve regenerated again, when I clearly haven’t. Well, not in this world, anyway, I think but do not say.

“You could say that,” I say instead with a small snort.

Deciding not to think too much of it, he shrugs and continues, “Anyway, while you were ‘napping,’ a lot has happened in the last ten minutes since we’ve been separated. Apparently, you—”

“Wait, what?” I interrupt him. “I’ve only been here ten minutes?” How in the hell is that possible?

“Yes,” he confirms. “That’s how long you were in the coma for. At least in real time.”

“It felt like days,” I admit, in total disbelief. Maybe weeks, or even months.

“More like years,” he corrects me. I frown at him as he explains, “While you were in the coma, you physically aged sixteen years.”

“What? How?” I check my body once more for changes, but I find none; at least any obvious ones.

“It’s a long explanation. Apparently, the man you met in the shop upstairs was run by a long-time wanted criminal named Jakah Sutek. He was a doctor who studied ways to physically drain people of their life-force and steal the years for himself by forcing them into a lifelong coma. The longer the ‘patient’ stayed in the coma, the more their life-force would drain from them and eventually kill them. Also, the more their life-force was drained, the faster they would physically age.”

“So how come I aged sixteen years even when I’ve only been in the coma for ten minutes?” I frown in confusion.

“In recent years, Jakah found a way to upgrade his technology to the point where his ‘patients’’ life-force would transfer to himself to prevent him from aging,” Dad continues. “At least that’s what I heard him say to the police. At the same time, it would have the opposite effect on the ‘patient.’ It would rapidly age the person the same number of years as the number of years he’d stolen from them.”

“That’s why he wanted me,” I nod. “With a Time Lord’s body, especially a young one like mine, he could drain my life-force for centuries and remain youthful for just as long, maybe longer. He could’ve kept me locked up forever, had you not found me when you did.”

“Exactly. And to prevent anyone from waking up, he forced them into an everlasting dream-state that would appear and feel real. The dream would look and feel just like the ‘patient’s’ real life as it already is, or it’s altered in some way where they end up making a different decision, and they end up seeing an alternate life based on that different decision, and again it would feel real. Ever since he escaped prison, and before you showed up, he drained over two-hundred people of their lives, and three more were just now added to the stack.”

That would explain why he was so adamant about knowing how I wanted my life to be changed, I think in my head before asking curiously, “What happened to the other people who didn’t die? Are they alright?”

“They will be,” Dad nods. “As will you. As I said, thankfully he only ‘stole’ sixteen years from you, therefore aging you sixteen years. In your ‘dream-life,’ you must’ve changed an event that happened around the time when you were sixteen years old, and he stole all of the years from your birth leading up to that point. I can imagine what moment you chose to change…” He then pauses before continuing, “But I can also imagine that that ‘change’ didn’t work out in the way that you intended.”

Well, it wasn’t one moment I chose to change so much as choosing to change my entire life; more than that, my entire species, I think about saying but don’t. “Trust me, it was a much bigger change than what you’re thinking,” I say instead. “And no, it didn’t work out very well. I will say there was one thing that changed that I appreciated. I got to see my guardians one last time.” At least I got to have a bit of proper closure from that.

“Oh, that’s good. You got to give them a proper goodbye?”

“Sort of,” I say before deciding to tell him what really happened. “At the time I was dealing with much bigger problems, such as trying to get back to the ‘real world’—in other words, ‘wake up.’ As much as I appreciated to have my guardians as my real parents for a while, at the same time I felt that things weren’t as right as I wanted them to be. Somehow, I wished you and River out of my life, and I became a legitimate human. At the same time my friendship with Hazel was significantly more complicated, which was something I didn’t expect. I would’ve thought my being a Time Lord would’ve complicated things more, but that wasn’t the case at all this time, surprisingly. At least I was still able to retain all of my old memories of this life. That was what made our relationship so strained. Whenever I talked about my ‘old life,’ she always thought I was talking nonsense, and she got easily annoyed. Things got even more complicated when I discovered that there was another version of me running around the universe, causing chaos for the Silence; apparently, she—the other me—had been raised by the Silence her whole life, just like River would’ve been, but she was much more dangerous than River ever was back then. She actually succeeded to kill both of you, and I ended up having to kill her in return, again. It was horrible.”

I originally thought that killing my ‘fear’ self in Victorian London was one of the most (if not the most) horrible things I’ve ever had to do, but no; this time was excruciatingly worse, mainly because of how real she seemed as well as everything else, and how scared I was that that had seemingly become my new life rewritten in stone. Thank God that wasn’t the case; otherwise I don’t know what I would’ve done.

“Don’t worry, Nova,” Dad says as he wraps his arm around me to comfort me. “You’re safe now; you’re awake now. None of that was real.” It’s also nice to hear him calling me ‘Nova’ again, just as it always should be.

“I know,” I nod. “But back then, I wasn’t even sure if I was ever going to come back—to this world, I mean. Back to my old life. You have no idea how relieved I am to be back.”

“No, I do know,” he shakes his head. “I can see it in your eyes and sense it through our psychic link. You went through a lot of pain in so little time. You didn’t deserve any of it. I’m so sorry I wasn’t here to stop all of this sooner. I shouldn’t have left you to go off by yourself.”

“It’s fine, Dad; really,” I shake my head back at him. “At least I’m back in the real world now, so none of it matters anymore. I can put it all behind me.” I suddenly feel a wave of drowsiness hit me, and I feel myself falling backwards into him involuntarily.

“Nova?” he exclaims as he wraps his arms around me again. “Are you alright? You’re looking very pale.” He caresses my cheek in concern as he says this.

“I’m fine,” I say as I shake my head again, shaking away the drowsiness. “I’m just tired.” I then ask curiously to distract me from the feeling, “What about you? Did the creep try to steal any of your years?” Surely from seeing the Doctor, the man must’ve realized how many more years he had than me, and he decided to try to steal all of his years in addition to mine, at least before Dad stopped him and he was caught by the police.

Dad nods and shrugs. “Yes, but of course I stopped him before he could. Once I did, I called these ‘Big Chief Rhino Boys’ over here.” He gestures to a small group of (I kid you not) literal rhinoceroses dressed in strange black police uniforms and seemingly tending to the other ‘patients’ the man had kidnapped.

One of the rhinoceroses enters the small room we’re in and announces to us in a deep voice that seemed low and loud enough to cause a small earthquake, “Jakah Sutek has been arrested. The others are safe. They will be taken to the nearest medical facility for examination.”

“Thank you,” Dad nods his approval. “That’s good to hear.”

I can’t help but mutter to him under my breath as I stare in disbelief at the bipedal rhino, “Um, am I still dreaming, or is that really a talking rhinoceros standing on two feet in a police uniform?” I pinch my arm to make sure I’m still awake and wince in pain. Nope, I’m awake, I sigh to myself dismally, which means that the human-rhino-person-whatever is real. Great. Another odd thing to add to my long list of oddities in my freakishly odd life.

“Technically he’s not a rhinoceros,” Dad explains. “He’s a Judoon. They’re a police force that work for the Shadow Proclamation. Last I saw them, they helped me rescue your grandmother at Demons Run. And before that, they helped me locate the Earth that was stolen by the Daleks for a nefarious experiment that I managed to stop with various former friends and companions of mine. And before that, I met them in a hospital that was transported to Earth’s Moon when they were hunting for a Plasmavore, a bloodsucking alien that was on the run from them and posing as a human patient at the hospital. Although, the Judoon had tried to kill me back then, but we’re friends now.”

“Okay…” I raise an eyebrow at him. “Definitely the weirdest thing I’ve seen so far.” A rhinoceros walking and talking like a human is not something one sees every day, certainly not on Earth.

“You will stand,” the thing that Dad dubbed a ‘Judoon’ orders to me as he raises what looks like a weapon. “You are required to be scanned and evaluated.”

“I’m sorry; that wasn’t meant to be offensive,” I defend my earlier remark. “I’ve just never seen a talking rhinoceros before.”

“He’s not talking about your comment. He wants to scan you to make sure you’re alright,” Dad clarifies.

“Oh,” I nod as I glance at Dad timidly, not sure if letting ‘Big Chief Rhino Boy’ scan me is a good idea. Normally, I was always taught to avoid being scanned at all costs, not knowing what sorts of dangers, aside from the Silence, were out there that might want to take advantage of a Time Lord’s body, especially a ‘Deviant’ one like mine.

“You will stand,” the alien rhino demands of me again.

“It’s alright, Nova. He’s not going to hurt you,” Dad assures me as he gestures for me to obey (he is a police officer, after all, no matter what his appearance, so the same rules that would generally be followed around normal human police officers still apply here). “He is very friendly, I assure you. Do what he says. I’ll be right here. Go on.”

I sigh and reluctantly approach the rhino-cop. “Uh… Hi, Mr. Judoon…rhino…person… thingy.”

“You will be scanned,” the alien says as he points a bright blue laser-pointer at my face, temporarily blinding me. The device makes an odd sound when used. I squint and look away slightly so as not to get too blinded, even though I’m already seeing blurry dots in my vision. However, by the end, strangely, the blue light swiftly changes to a red one seemingly without warning. Or perhaps it is a warning that something is very wrong, specifically with me. “Scan complete,” the Judoon says as he puts away his scanner. “You have been registered as Nova Susan Song, child of the Doctor and River Song.”

“Um…good,” I say with an uneasy smile. “Does that mean I’m free to go then?” Perhaps that red light was simply an indication of a successful scan. Possibly…

Also, thank God I am, indeed, back in the real world, as I always should be.

“Not likely,” the alien rhino replies. “Records show you are wanted for the murder of King Astorvox of Margonia.”

“WHAT?” Dad and I both exclaim in unison.

In that moment, a couple of other Judoon enter the room with the first, and they all point legit guns at me.

“Whoa, whoa!” I exclaim in utter disbelief as I automatically put my hands up, hoping they won’t automatically shoot me.

“What is the meaning of this?!” Dad exclaims, just as outraged as me, maybe even more so, as he steps between me and the rhinos.

“What the hell?!” I protest out loud this time. “I didn’t do anything! How could I ha—”

“Silence!” the first Judoon snaps at us, clearly not caring one bit as he raises his gun higher, as do the other Judoon, like they will legitimately shoot me dead if I try to escape or will shoot my father if he tries to stop them. “Nova Susan Song, you are under arrest for the murder of King Astorvox of Margonia! Any attempt to escape or intervene will result in immediate execution!”

Chapter Text

I have no other choice than to remain silent. Not that that’s a huge problem, because I am already rendered speechless anyway. This can’t possibly be happening, and yet it is, which bears two questions that I am completely unable to find the answers to at this very moment:

Why? And How?

Why is this happening, specifically to me?

The better question is ‘how.’ How is this happening? Moreover, how in the hell could I have possibly murdered a king while in a coma? An alien king, no less; especially one that I’ve never even heard of?

Why do these sorts of things keep happening to me? Why do these sorts of things always keep happening to me?

“This has to be some kind of mistake!” my father protests to the space-rhinos. “My daughter would never kill anyone, much less a king! Plus, she’s been with me the whole time! Granted, she was in a coma in all that time, but there’s absolutely no way she could’ve killed a king while in a coma!”

“There is no mistake!” the chief rhino replies. “The human/Time Lord hybrid known as Nova Susan Song has, indeed, been witnessed in the murder of King Astorvox of Margonia! There is no deception involved!”

Dad shrugs. “Well then, if you say ‘there is no deception,’ where’s the proof, eh? I won’t let you arrest my daughter until I’ve seen proof that she, indeed, was responsible for the murder. So go on then; show us proof. We’ll wait.”

The argument then continues for another minute straight. Admittedly, I don’t understand the majority of the argument, but I at least can understand bits and pieces, such as “Judoon are not authorized to adhere to civilians’ requests,” etc., and Dad does absolutely everything he can to prove my innocence, using phrases along the lines of “Under Article [blah-blah-blah] of the Shadow Proclamation, you can’t arrest someone right away unless [blah-blah-blah].” Meanwhile, I’m standing here, still with my arms up in surrender, because that’s all I know how to do in the moment.

However, I begin to get the vibe that no matter what Dad says and does to prove my innocence, the Judoon don’t seem to care because they are gigantic assholes. This makes me wonder how Dad managed to convince them to help him save my grandmother at Demons Run all those years ago, and that maybe the Judoon only agreed to help because they were simply in a good mood and didn’t feel like pissing anyone off like most general police officers do.

Unfortunately, the Judoon seem to end up winning the argument, because Dad eventually sighs in seeming defeat and says with a groan, “Fine. Then can I at least say goodbye to my daughter before you take her away?”

The chief Judoon glances between us for a few seconds before complying seemingly reluctantly, “Privilege accepted. You have one minute.”

Even though a minute isn’t long enough for a proper goodbye (assholes; I told you), Dad thanks the alien anyway before he asks him to give us a bit of privacy and turns me away from them. Once the rhinos are out of earshot, Dad whispers to me, “Alright, Nova, we don’t have a lot of time, so we need to make this quick, okay?”

“You can’t let them take me away!” I say in an immensely annoyed tone. “Whatever they think I did, I didn’t do it!”

“I know you didn’t, and I promise we’ll figure this out together.”

“How’re we gonna do that while I’m confined in a jail cell?” I frown at him, totally unsure of how to help him in that scenario.

“I don’t know, but like I said, I’ll think of something. I’ll get some people together to help, maybe even your mother.” He then says while turning to me fully and holding me firmly by the shoulders, “Nova, listen to me. I know you’re scared, but I need you to put that aside and be brave now, alright? There’s nothing I can do to change their minds about taking you away, but I promise I will do everything I can to help you from the outside. I am going to do everything I can to prove your innocence. No matter where they take you, you must always keep that in mind. I will get you out of this, and I will not rest until I do. Promise me you won’t forget that.”

“I won’t,” I say honestly before I begin panicking, despite Dad telling me not to. “Where’re they gonna take me? What’re they gonna do to me? They’re not gonna kill me…” Generally, depending on how serious the crime is, the punishment is Death, and I don’t know if the same punishment applies on other planets. Dear God, I hope that’s not true…

“No! Of course not!” Dad frowns incredulously. “Not right away, anyway. They don’t have enough evidence to do that. I seriously doubt it.”

Wow! Thanks a lot, Dad! That makes me feel so much better! I can’t help thinking in my head, feeling my hearts-rate increasing by the millions.

“But even if they do decide that as your punishment,” he says quickly, sensing my growing anxiety, “I’ll stop that from happening.”

“And what if you can’t? I don’t want to regenerate again. Or worse…” Even though it’s been a few months, I still feel like I haven’t lived in my current body for very long, and I plan to keep it for several more years, maybe even centuries. Plus, I feel like I’ve only just legitimately gotten started with the space- and time-travelling, and I don’t plan to give that up anytime soon either. However, these jerk space-rhinos don’t seem to be making things easy for me, and they are mercilessly taking all of that away from me, which is incredibly frustrating.

“You won’t. I’ll find a way to save you before that happens. I swear,” Dad says before he pulls me into a hug, holding me so tightly that it feels as if the Judoon want to take me away from him, they’ll have to fight him to do so. I cling onto him just as tightly, refusing to let go.

“Your time has ended!” the chief Judoon grunts as he reenters the room. “Nova Susan Song, you will prepare yourself for immediate arrest!”

“No!” I scream as the space-rhino pulls me aggressively away from my father and claps me in handcuffs. “Dad, please don’t let them take me! Please don’t leave me!”

“I’m sorry, Nova!” Dad calls back to me as the Judoon begin dragging me away. “There’s nothing I can do! Remember what we talked about! Be brave! I’ll get you out of this, I swear! I love you!”

“Dad!” I scream as I struggle in the Judoon’s grip as he pulls me out of my father’s sight and up the stairs to the store’s main level where I am greeted with more Judoon that aid the other people that fell victim to the Shopkeeper’s filthy trap.

“Resistance is useless!” the Judoon snaps at me as he pushes me aggressively toward the exit. “You will be silent!”

I can’t help but begin crying as the Judoon march me across the market and past the TARDIS. We continue walking for several minutes seemingly outside of the city until we reach an open field where two tower-like spaceships are parked. I am loaded into one of them and am shoved into one of the holding cells next to another one that is occupied by the Shopkeeper (What did Dad say his name was again? ‘Jack Suits’ or something?) who looks to have aged thirty years since I last saw him, which was minutes ago in real time. The Shopkeeper sniggers loudly at me as I continue yelling and cursing fruitlessly at the Judoon as they leave us alone in the jail room and shut and lock the door. Eventually, I groan and give up and slide against the corner of my cell in defeat.

“Well, isn’t this a glorious spectacle!” the Shopkeeper continues sniggering while coughing legitimate dust from his lungs. “I didn’t expect you to get arrested alongside me. Heard you’re in for killing ol’ King Voxy. Now there’s a life I wouldn’t have minded taking for myself. He was a real pushover. Brilliant. Too bad I wasn’t there to see it.”

“You wouldn’t have seen much anyway,” I snap back at him, “because it didn’t happen. I didn’t kill anyone, certainly not a king. An alien king, for that matter. That was someone else. It wasn’t me.” My own words make me wonder who was truly responsible for the king’s murder and who’s framing me and why. I can only think of one group of people who would do such a thing: The Silence. Perhaps this is another tactic to attempt to get at me again. I wouldn’t be surprised if this is true.

In that moment, I feel a rough vibration in the floor from the spaceship’s engines erupting with power to transport us through Outer Space (and possibly Time, if this was also a time-machine, which I somehow doubt is true) to wherever criminally insane people are sent to. Perhaps some ‘Space Insane Asylum,’ I think nervously. This should be fun.

The Shopkeeper shrugs. “Well, even if it was you, I would’ve enjoyed seeing it either way. Time Lords have always been known to be a bunch of psychopaths. No doubt they were the ones that truly started the Time War way back when. Didn’t Pappy ever tell you that story? I wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t.”

I sigh, not wishing to talk further with this guy, yet he doesn’t seem to be giving me any other choice. “Yes, he told me. Why do you care?” I, of course, don’t mention actually seeing the War in Dad’s head as well as in Victorian London when his fear came to life.

The disgusting old man shrugs again. “Because eventually, every Time Lord becomes a psychopath in one form or another.”

I snort at him, doubting his words. What is he; some sort of ‘Time Lord Encyclopedia’?

“That’ll happen to one of your family members very soon,” he smirks creepily at me. “I’ve seen it.”

I snort again, this time out loud. “You’ve ‘seen’ it? What are you; some kind of psychic?” More like ‘psycho,’ I add in my head.

He shakes his head, sending a small cloud of dust flying out of his hair. “No. As I was draining your life-force, I saw your entire life flash before my eyes, including your personal future. There’s a great darkness coming your way very soon.”

He said that in a way like I should be afraid, and I can honestly say (though obviously not out loud and in front of him) that I am. One of the major things my father has taught me is that as a Time Lord, their lives were generally dangerous outside their home-planet, Gallifrey, and they tended to attract more danger to themselves outside Gallifrey as well. He taught me that this was something that I would have to deal with throughout my entire life, and it’s only going to get more dangerous as I grow older. Though, at the same time, he assured me that I would eventually find ways to live with the dangers and still live my life (lives) the way he always does.

However, a part of me worries that whatever future the Shopkeeper has seen won’t be able to be prevented or changed. This makes me wonder if Dad somehow knows of my personal future; perhaps he’d seen it in a vision of his own, perhaps around the time I was born, when our psychic link was first established. God knows how Dad manages to continue living life like normal, even with over a dozen prophecies chasing him all over Space/Time for centuries. I wonder if whatever future the Shopkeeper has seen is connected with Dad’s ‘Trenzalore’ prophecy, or it is connected to something else entirely. Either way, it makes me legitimately scared to know what he has seen.

I ultimately decide not to think about it, believing the Shopkeeper is just saying all of this to scare me—and honestly he’s doing a very good job—but I ignore him. “Thanks, but I’m not interested in hearing about it. There’s no darkness down the path I’m planning to tread down, and it certainly doesn’t include you.” He’ll be dead long before he ever finds out he was right about whatever he’d seen, and I seriously doubt that it is right.

He snorts in response, coughing out more dust from his airways. “Oh, trust me, I don’t have much time left to live anyway. Thanks to your father, I can’t ingest people’s lives and restore my youth anymore. Time is catching up with me, and it’s approaching fast. Hell, I seriously doubt I’ll survive the trip to where they’re taking us.”

“And you expect me to show you kindness and loan you some of my Regeneration Energy to help you?” I snort back. “After what you’ve done to all those innocent people, including me? Humph, not happening!”

He shakes his head before admitting, “I don’t expect you to. In fact, I’m not sorry for what I did to those people. Those people had it coming; at least some of them did.”

“And what of the others?” I growl, my anger increasing. “You just took their lives simply because you could? Including mine? Because you’re a selfish prick?”

“Hey now, let’s not use that kind of talk,” he says, seeming offended. “I’m dying. I expect a young lady like yourself to show some respect to those who are dying. Since I am dying, I would like to show you some respect by telling you a little secret. I know what’s coming for you. As I said before, there’s a great darkness coming your way very soon. Would you like to know?”

“I told you I wasn’t interested,” I snap at him before sneering in my head, The only thing I’m interested in is watching your egotistic ass turn to dust.

He shrugs and says, clearly not caring what I say, “Well, I’m going to go ahead and tell you anyway, because I know, deep down, that you are itching to know; plus you’re the only one who will listen before I take my last breath.” He pauses for dramatic effect before admitting, “Soon, you will reunite with someone whom you’ve thought to be long dead… You will be betrayed by one who calls you a lover… And when things are at their darkest, you will be obligated to make a sacrifice that will make you lose everything in the end.”

I take a moment to think over the three somewhat sinister things he listed. The first one about me reuniting with someone who was previously dead doesn’t sound too bad, but the other two certainly do. I will be betrayed by someone who I will fall in love with (or possibly vice versa)? And I will make a giant sacrifice that may or may not put an end to the universe and everything I love? None of that can be real…can it?

“How can I trust you?” I shake my head. “How can I trust that everything you just said will actually happen?”

The Shopkeeper shrugs as his body begins to shrivel up like a raisin and disintegrate. “Oh, you will once it all starts happening. You won’t have any choice other than to let it happen. And I must say, a part of me genuinely feels sorry for you.”

I can’t help but frown at this. Why on earth would he feel sorry for me? Why would he feel sorry for anyone, for that matter?

He pauses before whispering as his body tears itself apart and reduces to dust, blood and all, “What you will lose… I hope it’s worth it.” The prison cell becomes silent the moment he stops talking, and only a pile of ash remains.

Strangely enough, a miniscule part of me feels genuine sadness for Jack Suits (or whatever his actual name was); however, I choose to ignore the feeling and, instead, focus on the three things he said would happen to me in the near future.

Thinking about the bit about me reuniting with someone I “thought to be long dead,” the only person I can think of whom that could apply to is the woman who raised me, Josie Elise. I didn’t exactly see whether or not she had truly died along with the majority of the Silence members in the base, since I passed out from exhaustion and pain from being stabbed through the left heart by my mind-controlled bio-mother; plus, the TARDIS flew away long before the base exploded, so no one knows whether she truly survived or not. This thought makes me think that sometime in the near future, I may find a way to save my mother-guardian before the Silence base’s eventual explosion. Or the Shopkeeper was referring to someone else whom I will meet later. As of right now, only Time will tell.

About the “lover” who will end up betraying me, I can’t think of anyone whom that could apply to that I know in the present moment. The only person that comes to mind is Sam Davies from high school, but he seems very unlikely, even when we “sort of dated” back then (even when, for me, it was just to be nice), but I never saw him as a true lover, especially after he began showing his narcissistic colors. On that thought, perhaps the Shopkeeper was referring to someone else about that as well. In any case, I don’t much like the idea of being betrayed by someone I will fall in love with, so I’ll simply refuse to fall in love; I’m pretty sure that’s still an option, right?

However, the third thing he mentioned is what concerns me the most. I, of course, have absolutely no idea what kind of sacrifice I’ll be obligated to make, nor for what reason, but I am absolutely terrified to find out. It was definitely unusual for the Shopkeeper to be sad for me, as bad of a man as he was, and if whatever sacrifice he saw me make in the future disturbed even him that much to make him feel the need to express his concerns for me about it, it must be huge; so huge to the point that it may affect not just myself and my family but the entire universe as well. In other words, whatever sacrifice I make would determine the fate of the entire universe, which is, admittedly, a much too big of a responsibility for a young girl like me. In all honesty, I feel as if I’ve only just started my legitimate life as a time-traveler; I’ve still got much to learn, and already there’s an ominous prophecy looming over my shoulders.

But that’s not the most disturbing thing. What’s really disturbing is what the Shopkeeper said about whether or not the sacrifice I’ll make will be “worth it;” in other words, was making the sacrifice—whatever it is—truly the best decision on my part? I remember the man saying it in a way that he didn’t see the aftermath of the actual sacrifice when he saw the vision, so even he didn’t know whether it was truly worth the sacrifice or not, or even whether or not I will survive the experience.

Does this mean I will die in the near future? Am I fated to sacrifice my life for the good of the universe? God, I seriously hope not.

The next thing I know, the Judoon ship seemingly lands, and the space-rhinos enter the Holding Cells to retrieve me. As they clap me in handcuffs again, I see one of them glance over at the pile of dust on the floor in the next cell and grunt carelessly at it before dragging me away. For several minutes, they march me through the gratuitously bright hallways of what looks like a cross between a Star Trek spaceport and a judicial court building. At one point, I briefly overhear someone dub the place “The Shadow Proclamation,” and I instantly recognize the name as being what my parents described as “an Outer Space police station.” While I am marched through, I notice how unbelievably vast the place is, which makes me feel very small and vulnerable as a result. I see various Judoon and humanoid people with freaky red eyes staring at me as we march past, which makes me feel even more uncomfortable. The Judoon send me to another set of Holding Cells where I am kept for several minutes before finally being collected again to be sent to the Interrogation Rooms.

“You will wait here for interrogation!” one of the Judoon snaps as he shoves me inside an Interrogation Room and hooks my handcuffs to a small hook on the center of the table.

“Great! Will you get me something to eat and drink while I wait?” I call out to the space-rhino, but he ignores me as he leaves the room altogether, shutting and locking the door behind him. “No? Okay, thanks…for nothing,” I sigh as I slump against the table disappointedly. “Well this is gonna suck.”

I spend several more minutes (or what feels more like hours) absentmindedly playing with the handcuffs around my wrists while humming childish tunes to myself to pass the time.

Eventually, while humming in the middle of “Old MacDonald Had a Farm” (Don’t ask; I’m really not sure why), the Judoon finally returns. “Oh, finally,” I sigh in relief. “I thought you’d never come back. So I tried asking you for food earlier; I guess you didn’t hear me. I’m really hungry and would like to eat something before this ‘interrogation’ thing.”

“So-Jo-Cro-Go-Mo-Fro-Lo-Wo-Ho-Ro!” the Judoon replies in a very strange language, and I realize that this is a completely different Judoon than the one who shoved me in here. It’s so weird that every Judoon seems to look the exact same, and it briefly makes me wonder how they are able to tell each other apart (if at all).

“Um…okay,” I frown in reply. “Is that Rhino-Speak for ‘You should’ve said “please” first’?” I say the phrase in a deep voice in an attempt to mimic the Judoon, even though to me it sounded more like a very poor Batman impression. I pause before continuing, feeling awkward, “Which, yeah, looking back, I actually did forget to say ‘please.’ Sorry about that. Any chance you could still get me some food—Earth food? Please?” At least I said it this time, I add in my head; that should earn me something, right?

“Bo-To-Zo-Yo!” the space-rhino replies as he sits down in the chair opposite mine and holds up what looks like a small microphone to my face.

I frown, staring at the device. “Okay… I’m assuming you’re not gonna get me something to eat, and instead you want me to speak into that microphone-looking thing?”

The Judoon just grunts and holds the device up higher to my face in response.

“I’m gonna take that as a ‘yes,’” I decide before leaning forward to speak clearly through the microphone. “Okay… Um… Hi. My name is Nova Susan Song. My parents are The Doctor and River Song. I am currently being held here against my will by a bunch of talking rhinos from Outer Space. I—Hey!” I exclaim as the Judoon immediately takes the microphone away. “I wasn’t finished yet!” I protest. “I’ve still got a gazillion more things to say…about how much of a colossal waste of time this is,” I add under my breath with a roll of my eyes.

The Judoon slams the device into a nozzle on the chest plate of his uniform, and I immediately hear my own voice played back at high speed, and I chuckle when it also seemed to record my disapproved “hey” at the end before stopping. “Language assimilated,” the Judoon replies in perfect English. “Designation: Earth English.”

“Great,” I chuckle. “You know, I kinda liked you better talking like Santa Claus, but at least now I can understand what you’re saying. D’you know, my dad has actually met the real Santa Claus? Except his name isn’t really Santa; it’s actually Jeff.”

“You will be silent!” the Judoon suddenly snaps at me. “You will only speak when inquired!”

“Sorry,” I mutter while leaning awkwardly back in my chair. So much for that plan to stall for time, I add dismally in my head. I honestly don’t know how long it would take Dad to prove my innocence, so I plan to stall for as long as possible to thwart my possible death sentence, assuming that’s the punishment for the alien king’s murder.

For the next several (wasted) minutes, I am interrogated by the space-rhino, as ridiculous as that sounds. I, of course, answer the questions as truthfully as possible, saying things like “I didn’t do it,” “I wasn’t there,” etc., but at the same time I am very annoyed that I have to give the same answer to most questions, and the Judoon seems to expect me to give different answers (in other words, give answers that prove me to be guilty of the murder); but deep down I’m pretty sure that if I give any other answers, that would be considered as lying, which, apparently, are the type of answers that the Judoon seems to be asking for, but I refuse to lie as it’s generally (at least on Earth) against the law to lie to a police officer during interrogations. Plus, I’m trying to prove my own innocence, but the Judoon seems to refuse to let me by seemingly demanding that I ‘lie’ about my involvement (or, technically, lack thereof) in the murder.

After a long time of this, I begin ignoring the annoyance of the whole thing and, instead, begin to mentally poke fun at it. I can’t help but snort with amusement several times any time the Judoon would talk and I would answer back, thinking how idiotic it is to be talking to a rhinoceros and the rhinoceros is legitimately talking back, which doesn’t ever happen on Earth since rhinoceroses don’t talk.

“What amuses you?” the Judoon asks suddenly in his deep Batman voice.

“I’m so sorry,” I chortle uncontrollably. “I just can’t take you seriously. You make me look like an idiot!”

“Explain!” the space-rhino demands of me.

"How is it not obvious?!” I exclaim incredulously. “I’m talking to a rhino! Not only that, but the rhino is talking back! That shouldn’t even be possible, especially where I come from. Rhinos don’t talk where I come from; they only grunt. I don’t mean to be racist, but is there someone else that can do this thing; someone closer to human? I’m really sorry, but I just can’t talk to you anymore!” Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought, if I was ever to be arrested for something, I would be interrogated by a rhinoceros, of all things. Who ever heard of such an outrageous thing?!

“Only Judoon coordinate interrogations. No other being can intervene.”

“Well, surely your boss can take over?” I suggest. “You do have a boss, right? Or is he a talking space-rhino too?”

“Judoon, indeed, have a superior who is not Judoon,” the space-rhino grunts in affirmation. “The Shadow Architect. But she is indisposed at this time.”

“Oh, your boss is a ‘she?’ Great! When will she not be indisposed? I’d like to talk to her instead.”

"Unknown. If you request an audience with The Shadow Architect, you will be required to wait for some time.”

“That’s fine,” I shrug. “I’ve already had to wait an ungodly number of hours for this ridiculous thing to be over. I’ll honestly be willing to wait a little longer, especially if it means I get to finally talk to someone normal.” Particularly someone not Rhino, I add in my head before asking aloud as the Judoon gets up and begins leaving the room, “Hey, could you ask someone to get me some food on your way ou—” only for me to be rudely cut off as the Judoon shuts and locks the door, leaving me alone once again. “Okay, you’re just gonna ignore me again,” I say disappointedly. “That’s cool. Don’t mind me; I’m just gonna hang out here and slowly die of starvation and boredom. Not like any of you care.”

I lean over the table and lay across my arms in defeat. After a few seconds, I get the sense that I’m being watched, and I glance up toward the locked door to see a white-haired and red-eyed woman staring in at me through the window with a seeming mix of sympathy and curiosity. I frown back at the woman, wondering why she seems so interested in me, and the woman rushes away and out of sight. I lean back down again and consider taking a short snooze and hope that someone would return with food the moment I wake up.

Thankfully, ten minutes later, surprisingly, the same white-haired woman from earlier returns, this time with a large tray of food in her hands. I shoot my head up at her in shock.

“Sorry to startle you, miss,” the woman says kindly. “I overheard you requested something to eat and drink, so I brought you this. It was the closest thing I could find that was of Earth origin.” She slides the tray to me, and on it is a small glass of water as well as a large bowl of an unrecognizable fruit.

“Oh, finally someone who actually cares,” I sigh in relief. “Thank you so much.” I then ask after I take several swigs of water, “Are you who they call ‘the Shadow Architect’?”

The woman shakes her head. “No. I’m just a simple servant girl. I’m the one who does what is required to keep prisoners alive until their official sentencing. I also serve the Shadow Architect.”

“That’s cool. I hope they don’t make you work too hard,” I smile kindly at her before taking a piece of fruit and popping it in my mouth. “Mmm…” I sigh in approval. “This fruit’s really good. Tastes like strawberries.” I then pause, seeing the woman staring at me strangely. “What’s wrong? Did I dribble down my shirt or something?” I ask her before looking down at my shirt anyway as well as wiping my chin with my shirt sleeve, even though no stains seem to be present.

The woman looks me up and down like she’s trying to “read” me. “You are…something new,” she says with a curious frown. “Something I have never before seen…”

I frown back, swallowing awkwardly. “Um… I’m sorry I don’t know what you mean. You mean you’ve never seen a Time Lord before; rather, Time Lady, since I’m a girl? Rather, human Time Lady, since I’m a Time Lady on my father’s side and a human on my mother’s. Yeah, I get that a lot. It’s kinda annoying, to be honest. When people find that out about me, they freak out, and I really don’t understand why they should. I’m honestly just a girl; that’s all I really want to be. Why can’t people see me as ‘just a girl’? Why do they always insist on seeing me as some sort of god? I’m not a god. I don’t want to be a god. I just want to be me, you know? I just want to be normal.” This has been something that’s really bothered me since I started travelling with my father, and even though he tells me to just ignore it, it’s exceedingly hard to do so, knowing how much it disturbs me.

"I’m sorry,” I sigh, feeling stressed. “I just don’t like when people think of me that way, and if you do, I mean no disrespect. I’m still getting used to this new life with my dad whom I didn’t know for the majority of my life. Hell, I’m still getting used to being a Time Lord in general. There’s so much I didn’t even know about Time Lords…what they’re capable of… I never knew I could do things like that, and it’s terrifying. I still can’t believe it, even after all this time, and I’ve only known my dad and my ‘Time-Lordy-ness’ for a few months, and there’s still so much more to learn.”

A while back (though at the same time it feels like it was sixteen years ago on account of how long it felt being in that goddamn coma), Dad taught me one of the weirdest and most disturbing abilities a Time Lord can do, which is to slow down both of my hearts to the point where even a heart monitor would think I was legitimately dead, and for a brief moment I actually felt as if I had died, even when in truth I didn’t. I never knew I was capable of doing such things, and it disturbed me greatly.

I sigh again, glancing up at the woman who, I doubt, understands any inkling of what I’m talking about. “I’m sorry again. I don’t know why I’m telling you all of this. It's just…you seem very easy to talk to, that’s all. In fact, you seem to be the only person here that actually cares to listen. Basically what I’m saying is, it would be nice if I could give up my powers for a while, even just for a day. That’s all.”

For a brief moment, I imagine actually giving up my powers and just being human for a day, and how amazing that would feel—that feeling of true freedom. Free of the fear I’ve felt since embracing my so-called ‘Time-Lordy-ness.’ Free of the guilt of everything I’ve put my family through since the beginning. Free of all of the responsibilities that come with being a Time Lord and time-traveler. If only I could escape all of that, just for one day…

But even if I could give up my powers for a day, what would that day look like? Would it truly be normal? Would it truly be the life I’ve always wanted? How would this affect my family? Would they approve and would be alright? Would I be able to get my powers back once the day is up?

“But at the same time I’m afraid to give them up,” I continue in a nervous tone, “especially after all the times they’ve saved my life. I don’t know if it’s possible to give them up. And even if I could, would it even be right? Would it even be worth it?”

My words instantly make me think back on the Shopkeeper’s last words: ‘What you will lose… I hope it’s worth it.’ Was this the ‘sacrifice’ that the Shopkeeper was referring to that I would have to make in the future for the greater good?

“I’m sorry,” the woman says sadly.

“Thanks,” I sigh heavily. “You seem to be just about the only person who does here.”

“I meant about what is to come.”

I frown up at her, confused. “What do you mean? You mean what I was just talking about, or—?” ‘Or what my sentence is for what I obviously didn’t do?’ I was about to add before the woman interrupts me.

“I must go,” she says as she swiftly leaves the room, leaving the tray of food on the table for me to finish.

I frown and nod in puzzlement. “Uh—Okay. It was nice talking to you. Thanks again for the snack.”

I sigh again, thinking how utterly strange that interaction was. First, the woman comes in here to bring me food as well as make brief conversation with me, as she’s never met a Time Lord before. Next, she apologizes about something that will happen to me in my future, like she’s some kind of psychic. It was odd, since the Shopkeeper seemed to do the exact same thing (even though he wasn’t a true psychic like the woman seemingly was) before he reduced to ashes. I honestly don’t know what it is about us Time Lords, but somehow when we meet certain people, they seem to always get a sense of, or even see, bad things happening in our futures; it’s like we’re cursed or something.

Geez, how does Dad cope with it all?!

I chow down the rest of my food in minutes, and, annoyingly enough, the so-called ‘Shadow Architect’ doesn’t enter once I finish eating. It’s not until I’m on the cusp of falling asleep out of boredom several minutes later when the door finally opens again, and this time the woman from earlier (or rather, a similar woman) returns with another Judoon as a bodyguard. They close the door behind them after they enter.

“Hey, you’re back!” I exclaim in delight. “I wanted to ask you about—” I then pause, suddenly realizing that the woman is actually a completely different woman than the one before; this one’s freaky red eyes are less gentle and more stern-looking. “Oh, wait, no, you’re… You’re a different woman. Are you the Sh—?”

“Correct,” the new woman replies before I could finish. “I am, indeed, the Shadow Architect, leader of the Shadow Proclamation.” She then says, glaring pointedly at me, “And you, like your father, cannot possibly exist.”

I immediately pause, taken aback by her rude words. “Uh… Okay. I mean, you’re not wrong.” Geez, lady, a little harsh for a first impression, don’t you think? I frown disapprovingly in my head. I then shrug before admitting out loud, “I mean, sure, my birth may have been an accident at first, but I wouldn’t really say that’s true anym—”

“Like I told your father,” she interrupts again as she sits down and slides the empty tray aside noisily, “Time Lords are the stuff of legend. They belong in the myths and whispers of the higher species; therefore, as I said before, you cannot possibly exist.”

Seriously, what is this woman’s problem? I frown again, her bitchy attitude beginning to get on my nerves. “Well, sorry to disappoint you, but I do exist. Clearly, since I’m sitting right in front of you. Anyway, can we move on now to talk about why I’m being accused of…whatever I’m being accused of? Coz I can tell you right now, like I told your dumb rhinos a-gazillion-and-one times already, I didn’t do it.” What more do you people want from me? I add once more in my head with a roll of my eyes.

“So you claim,” the Shadow Architect shrugs. “However, we have proof that it was, indeed, you who was spotted on the scene. Observe.” She takes out a small cylinder and activates it to show a grainy 3D image of a scene of an alley that shows a humanoid teenage girl that looks strikingly similar to me stabbing an alien multiple times dressed in royal robes. The footage even shows the alien’s crown topple from his head and crash to the ground. Not long after, the girl glances completely up at the camera, showing an all-too-familiar face to be my own, and waves before running offscreen, leaving the king’s mangled and bloody body behind.

“What say you now, Miss Song?” the woman asks after she pauses the footage on my (rather, the imposter pretending to be me) face and glances at me.

I am absolutely dumbfounded at what I’d just seen. “What the hell?!” I exclaim. “That’s not me! I don’t even know where that is; I’ve never been there! I’ve never even seen that guy in the robes either!”

The Shadow Architect shrugs again. “Again, so you claim. However, as you have just seen, we have proof that it was, indeed, you. The resemblance is unmistakable.”

“That’s not me!” I say again. “It can’t be me! I told you, I’ve never seen that place, wherever that is! Whoever that is, that’s someone else pretending to be me! Why, I don’t know! It’s gotta be some Skinwalker or shapeshifter or something; not me!”

“Being a Time Lord, you have the ability to ‘shapeshift’ as well and walk in another’s skin, do you not?” the woman points out.

“That’s different!” I insist. “That’s Regeneration! This is something completely different from Regeneration! And besides, the last time I regenerated was, like, six months ago! Whenever this happened, it must’ve been recent, but I wasn’t there; I was in a coma during that time! Dad could’ve vouched for me if you’d let him accompany me; he was there with me the whole time. I swear, I’m innocent! He can tell you that, if he was here!” Surely, she’d listen to him, right? Or if not, he would make her listen to him?

“Be that as it may,” the Shadow Architect shrugs carelessly, “but his input is no longer required. We have our proof right here in front of us! The face has, indeed, been registered as Nova Susan Song’s—yours! Your word is no longer accepted, nor is anyone else’s! On a side note, as a time-traveler, one has a habit of claiming they have not done something, and that is only because they have not done the deed yet. That being said, even if you have not killed the king as you now claim, who is to say you will do it sometime in your personal future? How, Miss Song, can you prove that this isn’t you from the future?”

I pause, suddenly having nothing to say besides, “I… I don’t know. I guess you’re just gonna have to take my word that I’m never gonna go there and kill him?” In all honesty, I’m pretty sure there’s no real way to physically prove that I’ll never commit the crime, even in the future (besides simply not doing it, of course). I seriously doubt that she can physically send someone to watch me 24/7 for the rest of my life; just the idea sounds absolutely gut-wrenching.

“Yes, I suppose we could,” she shrugs again. “However, we cannot ‘take your word’ for it. That kind of proof is not enough.”

Of course not, I roll my eyes. Typical ‘Bitch’ Speak.

“The only way to ensure that you will not commit this unlawful act is if we lock you up for a time,” she suggests.

“What?” I exclaim, appalled. “That’s not fair! Please, you’ve got to—”

“And by the holy writ of the Shadow Proclamation,” she continues, totally ignoring me, “I declare you, Nova Susan Song, guilty for the murder of King Astorvox of Margonia!”

“No! That’s not true! I’m not—”

“I am assigning you to three-thousand consecutive life-sentences in the Judoon Prison. On a regular basis, those who are charged with murder are sent to Stormcage Containment Facility; however, seeing as your family—particularly your mother—seems to have a bit of a reputation for both breaking in and out of Stormcage with ease, I am required to make a different decision. You will be escorted to the Judoon Prison on the morrow! Case closed!” She then says to the Judoon that accompanied her as she leaves, “Send her back to the Holding Cells in Section F. Keep her contained until dawn.”

“No!” I scream again as the Judoon seize me and drag me in the opposite direction as the Shadow Architect, back toward the Holding Cells where they kept me when we first arrived. “Please, this is a mistake! That ‘girl’ you caught on that camera isn’t me! It’s someone else! It’s got to be someone else! I would never murder a king! Please, you have to believe me! I didn’t do it! I won’t ever do it! Please, listen to me!”

No surprise, she doesn’t listen. No one does.

“Be silent! Resistance is futile!” the Judoon snaps at me as he escorts me back the way we came to the Holding Cells to await my fate.

Chapter Text

The next day at what I guess to be "dawn" (it's hard to tell the exact time of day when you're on a station in Deep Space), I am collected to be sent to the Judoon Prison, per my assigned sentencing. Thankfully, I am escorted with a small group of other inmates that were given a similar sentence as me, so I'm not completely alone. I am also thankful that none of the other inmates make conversation with me and just keep to themselves. However, one person—a buff humanoid alien with the body of a sumo wrestler—continually gives me the evil eye during the entire trip to the prison, which I find super creepy and disturbing. I attempt to ease the growing awkwardness by doing a staring contest with the guy instead, but sadly it doesn't make the situation any less creepy. Oh well, I shrug, worth a shot.

Once we arrive at the prison, we are escorted one-by-one through several processes before being sent to our private prison cells. After being forcefully stripped stark naked (including our underwear), each of us are probed very painfully (at least for me) in the shoulder by a device that inserts a tracking device as a way of tracking various inmates while they're freely wandering the prison. This particular fact comes as a major surprise to me, as most prisons don't allow inmates to leave their cells at any time except for meals; plus, most alien prisons shown in the Sci-Fi movies are very harsh and dirty, and even the inmates are treated just as badly.

I remember the Decontamination Process being particularly bad, as it was super painful, and excruciatingly so. It felt like my body was being melted from the inside out, much like Regeneration but a thousand times worse. In fact, I had a very hard time initiating the Regeneration process to heal myself from the experience not long after I was sent to my cell. Thankfully the experience only lasted a few seconds, but I considered those few seconds to be the worst few seconds of my life. I was also thankful that the Decontamination Process was cut short for me, and I was immediately sent off to the next room, though I had a very hard time getting back up on my feet as I was still in much pain. As I was dressing into the regular prison garbs worn by the inmates here (which are blood-red in color with strange markings on the side in alien calligraphy, like a designation number of sorts), I remember hearing the next person come into the Decontamination Chamber, and he winced slightly but wasn't in excruciating pain (unlike me), which made me envy him quite a bit. I even caught Mr. Evil Eye smirk and snigger at me once he was done being decontaminated, as, much like everyone else, he barely felt a tingle.

Once we're all dressed, we are escorted to our individual cells. Thankfully I don't have to share a cell with anyone, since I'm under the disturbing impression that a vast majority of inmates (especially Mr. Evil Eye) are imprisoned here because of my father. Perhaps this is the very reason why Mr. Evil Eye was giving me the said evil eye to begin with; he likely recognized me as the Doctor's daughter, and just my very presence had sparked much hatred toward me, which makes me afraid to run into him, even by accident; I can't imagine how violent he, and others, might get towards me the next time we meet. This makes me more anxious for Dad to get me out of here as soon as possible before things get especially ugly to the point where Regeneration may not be enough to save my life, especially after learning that killing another inmate, whether accidental or intentional, is apparently fair game here; in fact, any inmate who kills another inmate is highly praised for it afterwards, depending on how bad the inmate that was killed was previously.

Maybe I would've been better off at Stormcage, after all, I thought dismally to myself. Just my luck.

I spend the next few days going through the same boring routine. Most of my time is spent in my prison cell, but occasionally we're able to be released to "exercise" and eat for a few hours three times a day. Of course, when I'm actually in the mood to leave my cell, I spend most of my "Exercise Hours" just standing in a corner away from everyone, not interested at all in talking to anyone or having anyone talk to me, because, more than likely, the people who want to "talk" really just want to pick on and harass me for something my father had done to them way back when, which is absolutely ridiculous, as I had nothing to do with what happened between them, since I wasn't even born yet, but of course the inmates don't give a shit about that.

I especially make a point to stay away from Mr. Evil Eye whenever I see him wandering around the prison, especially when he seems to be looking for someone (particularly me, no doubt) every time he's out and about. In fact, everyone seems to try to stay away from him, as he appears to have no problem harassing anyone who enters his path, though he seems to have made me his primary target. At one point, I overheard one of the other inmates say Mr. Evil Eye had broken out of several prisons in the past to hunt down my father but kept getting recaptured, but I never found out what my father had done to put the creep in prison in the first place, and I personally don't wish to find out. Thankfully he hasn't been able to find my cell—at least, I think he hasn't—and needless to say I'd like to keep it that way.

Over time, I've noticed that Mr. Evil Eye has befriended several other inmates to hunt me down, and because of this, I've had a harder time avoiding them, so I've had to look for various places to hide from them, but there are only so many places I can hide in a prison besides my own cell. Sometimes, I've had no choice than to return to my cell early during Exercise Hours, and once I do, I'm not allowed to "exercise" or eat again until the next time inmates are released, which only happens five hours at a time. I've ended up having to skip a few much needed meals because of this, though I didn't mind much, as the food here tastes terrible; I'm pretty sure the food that the inmates eat are leftover scraps that the guards don't want to eat that are usually rotten or raw, like eating out of a garbage dumpster; I'd feel lucky to find the occasional slice of bread that's not entirely moldy.

Eventually an entire week goes by with still no sign of Dad or anyone he's sent to bust me out of this dump-heap. At this point, I've had to regenerate myself (thankfully not to the point where I have to change bodies, but I've come disturbingly close) at least five times due to being assaulted by Mr. Evil Eye's minions, and I honestly think I won't be able to handle much more of this harassment, especially when they seem to travel around in packs, so it's almost impossible now to avoid them or have any chance to escape them when they do catch me, as they're much stronger and bigger than me. On that thought, I'm beginning to wonder why Dad is taking this long to help me, especially after promising that he'd refuse to rest until I was back safe in the TARDIS. I seriously doubt that he's just monkeying around, knowing how important to him it is to save me. I can understand the delay if he was suddenly called to save a planet from destruction or extinction, but if it was anything else, it wouldn't make much sense. In any case, I feel I should've been busted out not even a full hour into my initial incarceration.

Where the hell are you, Dad?

Thankfully, things seemed to turn for the better for me—well, kind of. Something quite unusual. I say 'unusual,' because normally when I'm approached by someone, they want to cause me harm for something my father did, but this time I was approached by someone who didn't, for once, want to cause me harm. At this point, after so many people had attempted to kill me since I've been here, I've now had to carry around a knife (which I stole from the kitchen the last time I sat down for a proper meal) in my pocket to defend myself with, so I was prepared when a strikingly handsome middle-aged man with short brown hair and bright blue eyes approached me; of course, I never let his attractive looks deceive me.

"This seat taken?" the man asks while pointing to a seat near me.

Of course, I never let anyone sit anywhere near me for fear of them automatically killing me, so I let the man know I'm not interested in him doing the same by automatically turning toward him, raising the fork I was eating with to use as a weapon (I had stupidly left my knife in my cell under my pillow, as well as not thinking to grab the knife I had with my current meal), and saying sternly and clearly, "Touch me, and I'll stab you in the eye and shove it up your ass! Whatever my dad did to you way back when, I had nothing to do with it, so just screw off! I'm not in the mood today!" I'm sick and tired of being harassed and abused every hour of the day while imprisoned here, which makes me all the more anxious to escape. No doubt this guy was yet another one of Mr. Evil Eye's cronies.

"Whoa, whoa! Easy, tiger!" the man says, stepping back, speaking in an American accent, which I can't decide to be cool or offensive, thinking he's speaking like that to impress me, somehow knowing that I was raised in America as well. "I was only asking to sit. Plus, I thought you could use a friend. You seem lonely over here."

Thinking his excuse to be complete bullshit, I growl back, "Thanks, but no thanks! I don't need any 'friends,' and I certainly don't need anyone to punish me just for being what I am! I didn't ask to be a Time Lord, okay? That's just what I was born as; I had no control over that! And I certainly didn't have control over what Dad did to put you in here! Why should I be punished for something he did a long time ago, long before I was even born? Why can't you freaks just leave me alone?!"

After a few seconds of just standing there awkwardly, the man shrugs and says while seating himself down anyway, even though I never gave him permission to, "Well, if you think I'm here just to harass and abuse you, you're wrong, coz I'm not. Why would I want to abuse that beautiful face and body of yours? I must say, with a face and body like that, you make even prison garbs look like a trendy fashion choice. A family trait you get from your mother, I see."

Oh, wonderful, I scoff, rolling my eyes. A pervert. Just what I need right now.

"What's it to you?" I scoff out loud. "What do you know about my mother?"

"I know, like you, she was also in prison for killing someone," the man shrugs back. "Your father, to be specific, but the murder was fake; yet she stayed in prison anyway because nobody gave her a chance to explain herself."

"That's not entirely true," I point out. "It's not that anybody didn't give her a chance to explain what she'd done; rather, what she didn't actually do. She chose to stay in prison in order to protect my father. It was the only way to make the Silence and the rest of the universe believe that he was truly dead. She chose to keep the fact that he was still alive, that she didn't actually kill him, a secret; and she did it out of love." I'm pretty sure that, at this point, the entire universe knows of Dad's survival and Mom's betrayal at Lake Silencio, so keeping the secret any longer is pointless; of course, my birth may have had something to do with the secret getting out as well.

The man confirms my assumption by adding, "And then you came along, and the secret came out. That the Doctor had survived the lake, and your mother married and had a kid with the one person she was meant to assassinate not long thereafter. Trust me, I know the story. Of the infamous Human/Timelord hybrid who's destined for greatness. Yet here you are, in prison for killing a king. Not a very nice king, if I'm being completely honest, but still—"

"I didn't kill anybody!" I snap back at him. "Whoever that was they caught in that footage, it wasn't me! That's someone pretending to be me, probably to get me out of the way, or to trap me. Someone who doesn't want me to interfere or fight back. Someone who doesn't want me to escape."

Someone like Madame Kovarian, I immediately add in my head.

Of course it'd be her! Maybe not her specifically, but she definitely had something to do with my incarceration; no doubt the person that was posing as me in the footage was one of her stooges that somehow managed to survive the explosion at the Silence base a few months back, no doubt as another tactic to kidnap me and train me into the assassin they've wanted to make me since the beginning. Looking at this man in front of me, I can't help but think that he is one of said stooges that Kovarian had sent out to retrieve me while posing as an inmate and acting all 'charm and smiles' toward me to trick me into trusting him. Yeah right, I scoff in my head. Like I'd ever fall for that again.

"Who are you?" I ask him, glaring at him suspiciously.

The man perks up at this and smiles as he takes out a hand for me to shake; not that I have any interest at all in shaking it. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't get around to introducing myself. The name's Jack. Captain Jack Harkness. A pleasure to finally meet you in the flesh, Nova Susan Song."

Of course, instead of shaking his hand, I continue the interrogation. "Where are you from? You from America, like me?"

He chuckles. "Um, no, actually. I just talk like them. I'm from a very long way from here, much like everyone else in this prison. A place called The Boeshane Peninsula on the planet Earth in the 51st century."

"What was it like there? Silent? Unforgettable?" I try to test Jack to see how he reacts with the words that are affiliated with the Silence, seeing if he will subconsciously break character; in other words, drop the act, knowing that I'm on to him about his true identity and where his true allegiances lie.

He pauses. "Uh, it was never silent; but unforgettable, yes. It was beautiful. I would give anything to return one day." He then frowns, seeming legitimately confused. "Why did you ask that question like that? Did you honestly think I would truly forget my home?"

"No, of course not," I say quickly. "It's just… There are certain people who bad things have happened to, and because of what they went through—what they became—it forced them to forget where they came from, who they once were." I still can't believe Kovarian would do such a thing to so many innocent people; to turn them into killers, even just to kill one person. Especially the fact that they are still stopping at nothing to do the same thing to me.

They'll never quit…not until we're all dead.

"That sounds terrible," Jack says apologetically, and he seems to truly mean it. "I can't imagine."

"I can," I growl. "I've seen it happen. It happened to my mother. Twice. I saw it happen the second time; I wasn't born yet to see it the first time. They brainwashed her into becoming a killer again. You know them, right?" Of course he does! Anyone who wishes to get close to me these days is a secret member of the Silence; at least people who are not members of my family or people I already trust, like my best friend Hazel McAdams.

Jack frowns at me, seeming genuinely puzzled, but I still don't buy into his act. "Uh…can you be a bit more specific? You talking about one of your parents' enemies?"

I nod. "Yes. The Silence. You know them."

"I know of them," he shrugs back. "Can't say I'm tight with them, if that's what you're asking. I don't fancy being connected with people who want to kill my friends. I make a point to stay away from people like that."

"And why should I believe you?" I ask, crossing my arms.

"Excuse me?" he says, somewhat offended.

"How do I know that what you're saying is true?" I clarify, glaring accusingly at him. "How do I know you're not one of them? Coz see, that's exactly how they work. That's how people are tricked into being pulled into their web, like a moth to a flame, like a fly being attracted to something sweet. I know what you're doing, 'Jack,' and it won't work." I seriously doubt that 'Jack' is his real name.

He frowns before explaining. "Okay, I really don't know what you're accusing me of. I'm assuming you think I'm here to harm you, abuse you, kidnap you, whatever; but I'm honestly not. I'm here to help you. Your dad sent me to find you and bust you out of here, because we both know you're being falsely accused of murder; though he's still trying to figure out who's framing you and why. We go way back, the Doc and me."

"Uh-huh, and that's exactly what a member of the Silence would say!" I scoff, having enough of this faker. "To trick me into believing that crap when, in reality, you're trying to make me feel secure and safe around you by pretending to not be affiliated with the Silence when you really are! To which I say, 'kiss my ass,' because I'm not falling for it! Not again! I've learned ways to spot a con a millennium away! So, once you get out of prison—if that ever happens—you tell Kovarian, for me, to go screw herself and go to Hell! The same applies to you as well!" With that, I immediately get up and prepare to leave back to my cell.

“Nova, wait!” Jack calls after me. “I’m not—”

“Stay away from me!” I yell back at him. “I’ll find a way out of here myself—Oh!” I gasp upon slamming into someone entering the cafeteria and back away from them.

“Good luck gettin’ outta here alive, princess!” an all-too-familiar voice sniggers from above me.

“Fudgeknuckle!” I exclaim upon seeing the punched-in face of Mr. Evil Eye, whom I’d been avoiding all this time and, unfortunately, has finally found me.

I immediately scream when he grabs my shoulder tight enough to break bone. “You’re not goin’ anywhere! Not until the Doctor has paid for what he did to me!”

“To all of us!” one of his cronies corrects him. His other cronies cheer in agreement.

“Not until you have paid for him!” Mr. Evil Eye glares at me.

Not again!

“Ugh, why?” I groan out loud. “I shouldn’t be punished for something he did! Whatever it was, that was a long time ago! Who the hell cares anymore! I wasn’t even born yet!”

“It doesn’t matter!” he shakes his head. “You’re his child, and you’re here! If I can’t punish him, I suppose I’ll have to punish you instead!” He then grabs me by the front of my shirt, lifts me up like I weigh the same amount as a bird’s feather, and slams me down hard on a nearby table, breaking it under impact, before wrapping his fingers around my throat and grabbing a used knife from another table that one of his cronies handed him. I exclaim loudly in pain from my spine, as well as a few ribs, breaking upon impact with the table.

“Let me go!” I scream at him as I attempt to fight and kick him, but he’s too strong. “Get off me!”

Of course! He’s the size of a sumo wrestler; he’d be able to break me as easily as a tooth pick! In fact, he already has!

Mr. Evil Eye sniggers as he raises the knife up to my face. “Oh, I’ve been waitin’ for this day for a very long time! I’ve waited so long to slay a Time Lord once and for all! I would’ve preferred that it was your daddy, but I suppose you’ll do for now. To slay the child of the Doctor… Now that I think about it, that’s even better. This way, I get to make him pay for what he did to me! Brilliant! The price he pays is you! His own daughter! How does that make you feel, eh? Angry? Disgusted? Betrayed? Yeah, you get used to it. If there’s one thing he’s known for, it’s manipulatin’ people for his own gain. Trickin’ them into sacrificin’ themselves for him. He refused to pay the price and face me himself, so he sent you to me instead. So like him. Not even close to the lovin’ father you thought, huh?” He sniggers once more, this time to his cronies. “Let’s see, boys… What should we cut out first, hmm?”

They each throw out their preferences.

“Cut out her eyes!”

“Cut out her tongue!”

“Cut out her hearts!”

“Kill her ‘til she regenerates, then kill her again! I know all about the Time Lords; I studied them for years!” This crony then smirks at me creepily, and somehow I find this particular crony to be strangely familiar, though I can’t figure out why or where I’d seen him before. “In fact, she’s the reason why I’m stuck in this dump-heap—her damn mother! She stopped me from taking her to my mistress, Madame Kovarian!”

Oh my god! That’s where I recognize him! He’s one of the other Silence members that accompanied ‘Voldemort’ in the alley in London that tried to kidnap me! At least before my mother showed up and kicked his ass, along with everybody else’s.

“Originally, we were tasked to bring the Time Tot to her,” the crony continues, “but we failed and were sent here! Because of her mother! We were supposed to bring her to Kovarian alive, but frankly who cares what Kovarian says or thinks of me now! It would be a great privilege to see the Doctor’s child slaughtered just to spite him! Allow me the honor to dispatch her!”

“Nah,” Mr. Evil Eye says, his smirk widening. “As I said, I’ve waited centuries to slay a Time Lord!” Mr. Evil Eye pauses and chuckles to himself. “Hmm… Let’s see… Cut out her eyes first, or her hearts… Tough choice. I think…I’ll cut out her hearts first…” He then adds as he lowers the knife to my chest and prepares to slit me open like one dissects a frog, “Slowly.”

“NO!” I can’t help but scream helplessly, believing that no one, not even my father, will save me this time.

That is, until Mr. Evil Eye screams in pain from another knife having been thrown from the other side of the room and imbedding itself into his wrist, forcing him to drop the knife he had been given, followed by a deep American accent saying a little too calmly, “Hey, buddy, I don’t think you want to be doing that! You harm her, the Doc won’t be too happy with you! You wanna punish him, do it by punishing me instead! Leave the lady alone! She shouldn’t have to pay for Daddy’s mistakes!”

What the hell?! What is he doing?

Mr. Evil Eye growls at this, saying, “On the contrary, I very much so want to punish her! She’s a Time Lord! They all have to pay for their crimes, starting with the Doctor! Starting with her!”

Jack speaks up again before Mr. Evil Eye has a chance to raise the knife again. “Me! Starting with me! You really don’t want to kill her! Trust me, you’ll be much happier killing me instead!”

Are you serious?! That’s the most idiotic thing to say! Why would you say that!? He’s gonna kill us both anyway! It won’t make any difference!

Mr. Evil Eye pauses before deciding. “You know what? I actually would, just to shut you up! Dax, silence this nuisance!” He directs this toward the former Silence member from the alley.

Jack steps back as one of Mr. Evil Eye’s minions begins approaching him. “Now wait. When I said that you’ll be much happier killing me instead, I didn’t mean that literally. What I really meant to say is that w—” He is suddenly cut off midsentence as the minion dubbed ‘Dax’ snaps his neck, and he crumbles to the floor in a dead heap.

“Jack!” I gasp on instinct. You idiot! I can’t help sighing in my head. Why did you do that? I told you it wasn’t going to make a difference! That was the absolute worst time to act the heroic knight! That’s a good way to get killed, and look what happened! Serves your egotistic ass right! Serves him right for believing that I could trust him into not being a secret member of the Silence either.

However, despite these feelings, a small part of me can’t help but feel genuine sadness for Jack’s death. He was the first person—in fact, he was the only person—to approach me without feeling the need to harass me or kill me, and I greatly appreciated him for that, which makes me feel bad for not giving him a chance to prove that he was truly a good guy; I mean, he did just save my life (sort of). Sadly, I won’t ever have a chance to repay that kindness.

“Sorry for that interruption, sweet-cheeks,” Mr. Evil Eye sniggers at me once more as Dax returns to his side with a proud smirk on his face as if to say ‘That’s what you get for eluding me in the alley.’ “Now…where were we?” He then glances down at the knife in his hand—the knife that Jack had thrown into his wrist to save me from a merciless dissection which is, unfortunately, still imminent. “Ah, yes! We were goin’ to carve out your hearts. Slowly. Hold still, sweetie; I want to be able to watch the light leave your eyes.”

Oh, no, you  didn’t ! You did  not  just say that word! Oh, you’re going down, pal! You’re going down  hard !

I feel it the instant he says the word. I feel my energy building up inside me as my eyes take on that familiar golden tinge, and there is nothing but anger in my soul in that moment. “Only my mother calls me ‘sweetie!’” I growl as I use my energy—the same electrical energy that was seen during my previous Regeneration up on that cliffside—to blast the group away from me and crash into the far sides of the room. I watch as golden electrical currents blast through the tables and chairs, including the food bar, blasting everything to pieces all over the floor. Once the ordeal is over, I rise up to my feet, my hands still crackling with electricity, as I see everyone except for Mr. Evil Eye and his cronies run away in fear. “TOUCH ME AGAIN, AND YOU’LL REGRET IT!” I growl at them as they stare wide-eyed at me, in utter disbelief at what I had done. “LEAVE NOW, AND STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!”

“As you wish,” Mr. Evil Eye reluctantly agrees as his buddies rush away with everyone else, “but don’t think you’ll be so lucky next time. You won’t have a valiant knight in shining armor to protect you.”

Even despite my still feeling sad for Jack’s death, I shrug back with my eyes still shining gold with malice and contempt, “Who says I need one?” Why need a knight when I’ve got Regeneration Energy to rescue me just fine? I add in my head but don’t say out loud.

I watch as Mr. Evil Eye finally leaves the area, leaving me alone with Jack’s body and any other bodies that were caught in my supernova (no pun intended). Upon seeing Jack’s body, the energy immediately disappears from my vision and returns to normal, and I momentarily feel lightheaded as I nearly topple to the floor. Using a nearby table (that’s surprisingly still left mostly intact) as a barrier to lean on, I look around the cafeteria, genuinely surprised that I had caused such destruction, and, strangely enough, all over the death of a man I don’t even know. A man who claimed to be my father’s best friend from way back when. A man who had saved my life, even temporarily. A man who just wanted to be my friend as well. A man who hoped to help me escape this hellhole. Now he’s dead, and I am left on my own again. Left on my own to spend another week surrounded by psychopaths. At least now they will stay away from me, after what went down just now. Perhaps they’ll be too scared to approach me, thinking I’m now a psychopath, perhaps an even bigger one than they once were.

Looking at the destruction around me, it’s made me realize one thing. This was exactly what Madame Kovarian had planned for me to become. A psychopath. A literal supernova. This was the type of destruction that she had planned for me to bring about. I was to become a weapon that everyone would fear, and anyone within my blast radius would end up seriously hurt or dead. Ever since I first found out about my Time Lord ‘Deviant’ powers, I always feared what they would turn me into, and from the memories Dad showed me about the Deviants and why they had to be executed, and why he was so concerned when he found out about my being born Deviant, now it all makes sense to me. It even makes sense why people always see me as some all-powerful goddess. That’s because I am one, whether I want to be or not. He’s seen how powerful my energy is, how destructive it is, as has Kovarian, but they never knew how powerful I would become with even the star’s energy added to my already Deviant powers. They never expected me to become this powerful, and it terrifies them; deep down, even Kovarian is terrified of me. It especially terrifies me, now having seen proof and now understanding the truth about the power hiding just under my very skin, waiting to be released to cause further destruction and suffering when I least expect it.

Evil Nova’s and the Doctor’s words from my ‘coma world’ ring in my mind.

“Kovarian would beat me almost to the point of death, then I would use my Regeneration Energy to heal myself; and every time I would use my Energy on myself, it would make me physically stronger and more powerful. From these episodes, it made me realize how truly powerful my Energy was; how powerful it made me. With this energy, I was basically a God. I am a God. … But I wanted to be something more than what Kovarian was turning me into. She wanted to turn me into a weapon, but I wanted to be something more than just a weapon. I wanted people to fear me for my powers. I wanted them to see how powerful I truly was and kneel down at my feet. Kovarian refused to kneel, and so I killed her, and I don’t regret it one bit. How is that for pride since no one else was going to be proud of me?”

“Only a monster would be proud of the things you’ve done! That’s why Kovarian was never truly proud of you! You’ve turned into an even bigger monster than she ever was! She made an even bigger monster out of you, and that was her biggest mistake!”

Kovarian must’ve been absolutely terrified of the monster Evil Me became, what she turned her into by mistake, which resulted in Kovarian’s eventual death, at least in the ‘coma’ world. Could this end up being true in the real world as well? Would I end up becoming the same monster that Evil Me became?

Evil Me’s voice from my ‘fear’ projection in Victorian London rings in my ears:

“There’s still time for you! You can still become this! They’ll never stop hunting you! You’ll have to stop running eventually! Everybody does! You can’t run forever!”

Following that, the Shopkeeper’s words:

“Eventually, every Time Lord becomes a psychopath in one form or another. That’ll happen to one of your family members very soon. I’ve seen it.” Okay, so technically he was talking about someone else and not me, but it could still happen to me, regardless of what was said.

Not wishing to think about it further, I rush away back to my cell, not looking back.

Chapter Text

As expected, the next time inmates are released for Exercise Hours, everyone stays a great distance from me. After hearing about the commotion I caused in the cafeteria, everyone is way too scared to harass me anymore and obviously knows better than to attempt it again; at least they should now.

Good riddance, losers. Serves you right for messing with an all-powerful Time-Goddess.

On that thought of calling myself a ‘Time-Goddess,’ it still disturbs me that I seemed to literally be just that in the cafeteria. I had planned for ways to scare everyone into leaving me alone, but I didn’t plan to do it in the way that I did there. Since my previous Regeneration, my energy seems to have drastically increased in power and intensity, and I get the sense that that shouldn’t be happening, especially this early in my life. I remember Dad’s stories of how his latest Regenerations were seemingly growing more intense and destructive as time went on, but for me I get the sense that mine shouldn’t be this destructive, at least yet; then again, this could just be another side-effect of being Deviant. In any case, I decide not to think too much about it for now and, instead, focus on getting out of this prison once and for all…alone, as I have no one to help me now. I suppose that ‘Jack’ dude was meant to help me, since he claimed to have been sent by Dad to do just that, but since he was mercilessly killed, the chances of me getting out of here by myself are slim to none.

Sorry, Dad. It seems that your ‘help,’ Jackie-Boy, wasn’t so helpful, after all. Looks like you’re gonna have to hire another ‘knight in shining armor’ to rescue me from my ‘prison-tower.’ Should’ve hired Mom, or Strax, or—

“That was quite the ‘light show’ you performed in the cafeteria yesterday,” the unexpected and familiar voice of an American male suddenly speaks up from behind me, interrupting me from my thoughts. “Very impressive. Now I see why they named you ‘Nova.’” The voice pauses for a second, chuckling to himself. “More like ‘Supernova,’ since that’s what it looked like.”

I gasp and turn to see Jack Harkness standing there, rubbing gently at the ghastly purple spots that form a ring around the base of his neck. “Jack!” I exclaim in shock and relief that he is, in fact, still alive, as my luck seems to have made a turn for the better. “You’re alive!”

How ?! How the hell is he still alive? That’s impossible! No living creature could’ve survived a neck-snap like that! How the hell did he?!

“Course I’m alive!” he chuckles again. “Nothing keeps me down for long; especially not some lowlife like Marco. Boy, was he a rotten piece of work! I told him it would never have worked out between us, especially when I found out he was an enemy of your papa’s. Can’t even stay out of prison if his life depended on it! Serves the bastard right; am I right?” He then frowns and says to himself, “Though I can honestly say I was surprised that he didn’t recognize me. Oh well; like any of it matters anymore. That ship sailed long ago.”

Marco? That must be Mr. Evil Eye’s real name, I think to myself, or at least a nickname. I am honestly surprised that he and Jack once dated, or so Jack claims. Even if that was true, what in the world was Jack thinking, dating a whack-job like Marco?!

I shake my head. Whatever; it’s not important. What’s really important to know is—

“How?” I exclaim, finishing my last thought out loud. “How are you still alive? You shouldn’t be!”

Jack frowns at this, greatly offended. “Geez! That’s a little harsh, considering I’d saved you from getting dissected like a frog. You’re welcome, by the way!”

I shake my head. “No, I didn’t mean it like that. I mean when people generally get their neck snapped like that, they don’t come back from that. But somehow you did. How?” I deepen my frown in suspicion. “You’re not…like…a Time Lord, are you?” I’m pretty sure I would feel that from him, as I do from Mom and Dad, but I don’t, but I felt the need to ask anyway. “Or a similar being, at least? Did you, like, regenerate, or something?” How else would he have survived that neck-snap? That’s literally the only way he could’ve, right? I can’t see any physical changes to Jack’s body besides the nasty bruises around his neck, but I feel that the bruises would’ve healed if he was truly a Time Lord since Regeneration doesn’t leave behind any kind of scarring.

Jack chuckles. “Oh, I wish. But no, I’m not a Time Lord. Would be nice to be one, though. I wonder what I’ll look like as a woman, or as an entirely different species. Maybe change my skin to a different color, like green or blue or—”

“So how did you survive?” I interrupt, not interested in his appearance preferences.

He sighs. “Well…it’s complicated. One moment, I was exterminated by a Dalek while on an adventure with your dad and Rose—the girl he was travelling with at the time—and the next I’m somehow magically resurrected from the dead. Now I can’t die at all. Well I can, but I’m not dead for long.”

I frown. “So…you’re immortal now? Well, sort of, as technically no one’s truly immortal. Not for long, anyway.”

Jack shrugs. “I guess so. I haven’t really thought of it like that, but I suppose, yeah, I am immortal.” He smiles like the idea of being immortal is the greatest thing since Fish Fingers and Custard (don't ask; it was my father's creation, and it's honestly pretty good). Unfortunately for Jack, I have to disagree, as, to me, being immortal means outliving everyone and everything I’ve ever known. Just ask my father.

“How’d you end up like that?” I ask curiously.

Jack shrugs again. “Well, that’s even more complicated. After your old man abandoned me, he explained that Rose had messed with the TARDIS to get her back to him after he had sent her home. He said she had opened the Heart of the TARDIS and absorbed its energy, which temporarily turned her into an all-powerful Time-Goddess or something.”

“Sounds familiar,” I mutter to myself, thinking of the incident in the cafeteria yesterday and all the other times I involuntarily used my energy in a similar manner.

“Somehow with all that power,” Jack continues, “Rose was able to physically control Life and Death, and somehow brought me back to life after she erased the Dalek army from existence. Although the Doc claimed that he wasn’t aware that she had brought me back to life, and so abandoned me at that space station. Thankfully I still had my Vortex Manipulator. Speaking of which, I need to get it back somehow; it’d be very handy to get us out of here.”

“I’m not leaving until I get my sonic screwdriver back,” I point out. “They took it when I was sent here.”

“You’re just like your old man,” Jack snorts, shaking his head at me. “Most people can’t survive without their cellphones. With Time Lords, you lot just can’t survive without your fancy sonic gadgets and gizmos.”

“Hey, my ‘sonic gadget’ means a lot to me,” I frown. “I designed it myself, so it has extreme sentimental value. Not that you’d care.”

“Oh, I very much do care,” Jack says seriously. “I care about getting my Vortex Manipulator back as equally as I care about helping you get your sonic screwdriver back. So what do you say? Wanna hook up and get outta here together?”

I raise a skeptical eyebrow at this, hoping he means ‘hook up’ as in team up to achieve our goal. On a side note, I get the sense that Jack is telling the truth about helping me. “Did Dad really send you to find me?” I ask, making sure my sense is legit and not some dirty trick.

“He did,” Jack nods sincerely. “He said you might feel a little iffy about me, seeing as you have a difficult time trusting people you’ve never met.”

“Blame the Silence for that,” I growl, rolling my eyes. “It’s because of them that I can’t trust people.” This comment makes me wonder if any of the inmates here could be former Silence members, at least ones that weren’t killed off in the explosion at the base in the forest just months ago, or at Demons Run several years ago, or ones that simply decided to leave for various reasons.

“I know of them enough to understand that,” Jack nods before pointing out, “Although he failed to tell me about your little, shall we say, ‘outburst’ in the cafeteria; as I said before, that was quite the ‘light show’ you performed back there. What was all that about?”

I pause, suddenly feeling a large knot tie in my stomach. “I…couldn’t tell you.”

Jack raises a skeptical eyebrow at this, clearly not believing my lie. “Hmm… Sounds like you actually could tell me, but you refuse to.”

“I have a right to choose not to tell you,” I frown back at him. If I say it’s none of his business, then it’s none of his business.

Jack nods respectfully. “Sure you do, especially as a woman. I’m just saying, if it were to happen again, I need to be prepared. You caused a lot of damage back there, even killed a couple of people. Look.”

He points across the way at the entrance to the cafeteria where we can see it having been roped off to prevent people from getting inside. Even from our vantage point, I can still see the damage left over from my so-called ‘outburst,’ which twists my stomach into an even tighter knot. Thankfully I don’t see any bodies, but I assume the guards had already wheeled them out not long after the incident. I am also thankful that I wasn’t punished for destroying their cafeteria. Then again, it’s a cafeteria for the inmates and not the guards, which doesn’t necessarily mean I won’t still be punished by the inmates instead; although I doubt that would happen since everyone is still too paranoid to come anywhere near me. Honestly, I’m pretty sure everyone can survive a few days without their daily bowl of month-old porridge and moldy bread slice on the side.

“I know,” I sigh in shame, “and I’m not proud.” A small part of me is proud for scaring away everyone, but a larger part of me isn’t proud of the destruction I caused. I imagine if Dad was here, he’d be just as displeased with me as I am.

“Why not?” Jack frowns seemingly incredulously. “What you did was fantastic! I never knew a Time Lord could do something like that. I never saw your dad do anything like that before. I mean, I’ve seen him regenerate, but it was never that intense. Well, it was more of a half-Regeneration, but that’s beside the point.”

“That’s because it’s not supposed to be like that,” I shake my head. “Regenerations generally aren’t meant to be destructive, at least to that extent. What I did, that was a Deviant thing.”

Jack frowns, puzzled. “A ‘Deviant’ thing? What’s that mean?”

I growl, chastising myself for revealing that secret. Feeling no choice but to tell him now, I sigh and reluctantly explain. “It means I’m not like other Time Lords. Not even like my dad. Way back in Gallifreyan history, back when Dad was still just a kid, there were specific Time Lords called Deviants. They were Time Lords that literally deviated from the normal way of Time Lord Society. What that means is that Deviants had the same general abilities as a normal Time Lord, but their powers were a thousand times more advanced. For example, a Deviant could have more than the standard number of Regenerations—like, fifteen or more in one cycle, or maybe even endless Regenerations. Deviants’ telepathic abilities could be more advanced as well. For example, for Dad, he can project his mind into someone else’s from the opposite side of the room; but for me, I can project my mind into someone else’s across all of Space-Time; I did this with both my mother and father-guardian.” The memory of my father-guardian’s death suddenly flashes in my mind, but I immediately shake it away before continuing. “Because of these advanced abilities, they were considered as dangerous to Gallifreyan Society and were turned in to the government to be mercilessly experimented on or executed.”

“Wow,” Jack’s eyes widen in shock. “That’s brutal.”

I nod. “Yeah. Dad said it was the second worst event in Gallifreyan history behind the Time War.”

Jack nods sincerely. “Yeah, I bet. So you’re like a mega-Timelord. You seem to lord over everyone else, if you’ll pardon the pun.”

“I wouldn’t really say that,” I shake my head in disagreement. “If anything, I’m cursed.”

“‘Cursed?’” Jack frowns. “Why do you say that?”

I sigh before explaining. “It’s something the Silence did to me when I was just born. When they found out I was born Deviant, they took advantage of that by attempting to make my powers more…well, powerful. They used the energy of an exploding star—an actual supernova—to merge with my Regeneration Energy to make it more destructive; that’s why it’s generally not supposed to be that destructive. The reason why my energy is so destructive is because of the added energy from the literal supernova they were siphoning off. They were planning to use my enhanced powers to kill my family, particularly Dad.”

“Just like they tried to do to your mom,” Jack nods in understanding.

I shrug. “Well, sort of. They trained her into an assassin, but she was never Deviant; at least, I don’t think she is. What you saw in the cafeteria, that was exactly the kind of destruction that the Silence wanted me to cause to kill Dad. And the scariest part is, I can’t always control it. It’s like being in the Avatar State, if you’ve ever seen The Last Airbender series. Once I’m in that state, I can’t control myself.”

Jack frown, indicating that he’s not familiar with my reference. “‘The Avatar State?’ Is that when you’re all…godly?” As he says this, he makes arm and hand gestures to describe my energy (i.e. when my eyes glow bright, when my energy bursts out from my fingertips in electrical currents as seen in most superhero movies, etc.).

“Yeah,” I shrug again. “It’s absolutely terrifying. I never ever thought I’d be that powerful before. Hell, I never thought it was possible. Things like this should only ever exist in Sci-Fi movies, but apparently it’s all real.”

“I get it,” Jack nods with a small smile. “You’re used to the human way of life, since that’s how you were raised. A life where everything was simple. To be anything that’s not human is wrong to you.”

I nod. “Exactly. As you said, I’m used to the life I had where everything was simple. A life where I could fit in with everyone else, since no one knew my secret. Now everyone knows my secret; at least anyone who are my parents’ enemies. I wish I could go back to my old life where I was human, or at least believed to be human. Things were so much simpler back then, and safer. Now that I’m…like this—” I say as I gesture to my new Time Lord body. “—things are way more complicated than they really should be. Don’t get me wrong; I love travelling with Dad and everything he’s teaching me. But it still feels like it shouldn’t be real. Basically, everything I thought I knew about Science Fiction isn’t Science Fiction anymore, and that’s fascinating and terrifying at the same time. And the fact that I’m not human…” I pause for a minute before continuing. “Dad keeps saying it’s gonna take some getting used to just coz I’m still new to everything, but…I don’t feel like I’ll ever get used to it. All of this. It’s unlike anything I’ve ever imagined. I mean, I’ve always imagined it to be make-believe—you know, like something you only ever read about in fairytales or comic books—but it’s all real, and I’m still struggling to wrap my head around it all. It’s like I’m the lead character in my own Sci-Fi/Fantasy movie. It’s amazing and overwhelming at the same time.”

Jack nods sympathetically. “I completely understand. As your Pop said, you’ll get used to it. It’s not as bad as you think it is.”

I shake my head. “I’m not saying it’s bad, per se. It’s just…different. It’s a whole new way of life that I never thought I’d live. I never imagined myself to live such a life. It’s absolutely insane.”

“In a good way, I hope.”

“It depends. When we’re just travelling around as normal tourists, it’s great; but when we’re being hunted and killed just because of what we are, that’s not so great. The latter seems to be a never-ending thing these days. It’d be nice to take a break from that. A long break. I should be getting one very soon…if ever I get out of this dump-heap. I’m supposed to be starting back to college soon. I should get a message from Haze any day now.”

Jack frowns. “Haze? Who’s that?”

“Hazel,” I clarify. “Hazel McAdams. She’s my best friend I’ve known since first grade. She’s like a sister to me.”

“She human?”

“Yeah.”

“She know you’re not human?”

I nod. “She does, actually. I told her after we were attacked by a Sontaran bounty hunter at our local arcade when we were in high school. She was shot, and I healed her with my Regeneration Energy after I took her home. I was worried she wasn’t going to want to be friends with me after I told her my secret, but thankfully I was wrong. We’re still friends now; in fact, we’re roommates in college. I should be getting a message from her that the next semester will be starting soon and I need to come back and enroll before classes start.” I pause for a minute, sighing sadly. “Sometimes I envy her. She’s human, so she gets to do normal human things her whole life. I was able to for a while, when I didn’t know the truth about myself—my being Time Lord, I mean. Now that I know, I can’t have a normal human life anymore. Dad says the more I know about my true self, the more dangerous my life is. I especially can’t have a normal life, now that I’ve come into my Deviant powers. Everybody is able to sense it now, and I can’t stay in one place for very long because of it. If I’m found, everybody around me is in danger, and I can’t be responsible for someone getting hurt or killed; that’s happened way too many times. Nowhere is safe for me. Not anymore.”

Jack shrugs at this. “Why should that stop you? It’s never stopped your dad.”

“Yeah, but he’s never stayed in one place for longer than a day. Plus, he’s not Deviant. That’s why Deviants are so dangerous. They are much larger danger-magnets than normal Time Lords, and their powers are unpredictable. That’s why it was the law for Deviants to be hunted down and executed. They’re too dangerous to be left out in the open and in one place.”

“Is that still a law today?”

“I don’t know. Dad said it died with Gallifrey during the Time War, but he’s not sure if it’s still a law today, at least on other planets.”

Jack shrugs again, this time in a ‘who cares?’ manner. “Well, even if it is, that shouldn’t stop you from having that normal life you want, as long as you continue keeping the secret. Did anyone else know about your secret where you grew up?”

I shake my head. “Just Hazel and the people who raised me.” I then pause, thinking better. “Then again, there’s also my Aikido instructor. It turned out he was a secret member of the Silence, but I had no idea until years later, around the time I met my parents. Thankfully no one else knew. Although, there was another Silence member who tried to find me at my elementary school in second grade. He announced to the whole school that he was looking for a ‘girl’ named ‘Nova’ who was a ‘Time Lord’ and ‘the Doctor’s daughter,’ but thankfully no one knew it was me he was looking for. At the time I didn’t know ‘Nova’ was me either, since I went by a different name then.”

“Sandy, right?”

“Sydney,” I correct him. “Sydney Marie Elise. It was the name my guardians wanted to name their daughter if they were able to have kids. They couldn’t have kids, so that’s why they adopted me. Thankfully they had no problem raising a non-human. Even though my parents didn’t want to give me up, they had to do it anyway, knowing that was the only way for me to be safe from the Silence. Thank God they gave me up when they did, or I’d be in a very different position right now.” I can’t help but briefly think back on the two evil versions of myself from Victorian London and my ‘coma’ world, the fear of becoming like them pushing to the forefront of my brain.

“I imagine you’d be like your mom when she was still with them.”

I nod. “Yeah, but a million times worse. You saw what happened in the cafeteria yesterday. When I’m in that state, I’m not safe to be around. I end up hurting people, even some people I don’t want to hurt. As I said, I can’t control it. It’s terrifying.”

“Do you know what causes you to be in that state?” Jack asks curiously. “Coz if I was a betting man, I’d say it’s triggered by intense emotions, such as fear and anger.”

“Yeah, I believe so,” I nod before a sudden wave of anger floods both of my hearts. “I was so angry when they—”

Whoa, wait! What’re you doing? You can’t tell him that! He could still be an enemy for all you know! I pause, this thought suddenly flooding my cheeks red with embarrassment.

“When they what?” Jack frowns, puzzled. “When they kept harassing you?”

Oh, what the hell! He doesn’t seem that bad, at least so far. What’s the worst that can happen besides him teasing me for the rest of Time about my fretting over the life of a handsome stranger who may or may not be trusted, which may or may not prove that I have a slight crush on him?

I sigh before admitting, “Not just that. I was… I was also angry that they killed you. You were just trying to help, and… And they just snapped your neck without a care in the world. And when I thought that they were gonna kill me anyway… I was so scared. Scared that I would actually die, especially after they killed you. Since you’ve literally been the only person nice to me, and since you’d died, I felt alone again; completely alone. I was terrified that I would actually die and for absolutely no reason, just like you, which made me angrier. That’s when I snapped.”

There , Universe! I said it! Happy?

Jack smiles. “So my death triggered your so-called ‘Avatar State?’ You were angry that they killed me for trying to save your life, so you let ‘em have it?”

I shrug in a ‘so what?’ manner, feeling my cheeks blush even more. “I guess, yeah.”

Okay, so I may (or may not) have a slight crush on Jack. Again, so what?

Jack smiles at this (Ugh, how embarrassing!). “Hmm… I’m quite flattered. You say you don’t trust me, and yet, after I’d been killed, you unleashed your fury on everyone for what they’d done.”

“I just acted on instinct,” I half-lie, shaking my head. “It doesn’t mean anything.” Literally anyone would’ve done the same thing in this situation… Right?

“It means that you have a lot of your dad in you,” Jack says, this time in a serious tone. “Since I last saw him, I’ve heard stories about him. The things he’s done when those he loves are threatened or hurt… I can see why everybody calls him ‘The Oncoming Storm.’ I see much of that in you as well.”

I turn away again, feeling embarrassed as well as a bit disturbed to be that much like my father, especially when we’re both in our own versions of the ‘Oncoming Storm’ state. Now that I think about it, Dad’s version and my ‘supernova’ version are not so different from one another, which is both fascinating and terrifying at the same time. Both of our states seem to be triggered by extreme fear or anger and can be quite alarming, even destructive (at least in my case), especially to those who witness it. I imagine the ‘Oncoming Storm’ state was absolutely insane with Deviants. How much destruction they unintentionally (or otherwise) caused… All the people they hurt…

“Of course, it could mean something else as well,” Jack shrugs after a minute, mercifully interrupting me from my thoughts. “Something more than just instinct. Again, you say you don’t trust me, but deep down, I think you do trust me.” ‘More than that, you fancy me,’ he adds but, thankfully, doesn’t say out loud.

Okay, that last part he didn’t actually say, but it’s pretty obvious by the subtle and somewhat goofy smirk on his face that he’s thinking that about me. Ugh, will this embarrassment ever end?

“A little,” I speak up pointedly, crossing my arms. “I trust you a little, only because you cared to save me rather than let the freaks kill me. If you didn’t care, you would’ve just let them kill me, but you didn’t.”

“Of course not,” he shakes his head. “Your old man would kill me if I’d let them kill you. I wasn’t gonna let that happen. Plus, I wasn’t gonna let them bash that pretty face of yours. He would never forgive me for that either.”

“Originally, I thought I’d never get the chance to thank you,” I shrug, steering back to the topic of him saving my life. “Of course, that was before I found out you were immortal. So…thank you, I guess.”

“You are very welcome,” he smiles with self-pride. “The pleasure is all mine.”

“Although I have to be honest here,” I say with a frown. “The way you tried to stop them from dissecting me…that may have been ballsy, but it was also pretty stupid. You really could’ve died if you were normal.”

“But I’m not, am I?” Jack shrugs carelessly. “I wouldn’t have done it that way if I knew I could be properly killed, which I can’t now. Not anymore.”

“Yeah, but who’s to say your immortality is only temporary?” I point out. “Who’s to say you can only resurrect yourself a certain number of times, like the number of times Time Lords can regenerate? You may be immortal now, but you’re not immortal forever. Eventually all living things must die at some point, even Time Lords. Dad taught me this recently.”

“Wow! What a way to kill the mood!” Jack chuckles in a teasing manner.

“Hey, I’m just saying, you should really think about how many times you got left to resurrect yourself before you decide to sacrifice yourself for someone,” I say defensively. “Not that I don’t appreciate you trying to help me back there in the cafeteria. You never know how many times you got left. Mom and I keep telling Dad this, but he doesn’t take it seriously like we want him to, especially now that he can’t regenerate anymore. Back when he still had Regenerations left over, it wasn’t as big a deal, but now it is, and we keep telling him to be more careful, but he doesn’t listen, and it’s almost gotten him killed several times. All I’m saying is that you should start doing the same before you suddenly realize that you’re not coming back.”

“Okay, kid, calm down,” Jack puts his hands up in a calming gesture. “I get it. You don’t have to worry about me. I’m pretty sure I can resurrect myself a million times; I’ve got plenty more left. I am perfectly fine. And so are you. Your dad sent me to get you outta here and to protect you in the meantime. Remember when Marco said you no longer had a ‘knight in shining armor’ to protect you? He was wrong. I’m here, and I’m gonna protect your pretty face just fine. I give you my word.”

“You better keep your word,” I say seriously, “or I will stab you in the eye and shove it up your ass.” I make a point that I haven’t forgotten that promise to him, as I have no problem doing just that if he chooses to betray me anytime soon.

However, Jack chuckles anyway, clearly believing that I’m teasing, “I do hope you’re joking about that.”

“I’m not,” I say seriously. “I don’t take well to people who betray me.” I remember the Shopkeeper telling me that I ‘will be betrayed by one who calls [me] a lover,’ so I make a point not to trust anyone who might become a potential lover. Not that Jack is one of those people; he may be handsome and the biggest flirt I’ve ever met, but he’s way too old for me and is nowhere close to my type.

“Neither do I,” he says honestly, “but don’t worry. Your dad trusts me; of course, he wouldn’t have sent me to rescue you if he didn’t. If he can trust me, then you can trust me too.”

“Fine,” I sigh, rolling my eyes, “but I’m gonna be watching you very closely.” I may not think Jack to be a Silence member anymore, but I still wouldn’t put it past him to suddenly decide to betray me at any moment. Admittedly, the Shopkeeper’s words about me being betrayed in general has made me extremely paranoid about putting my trust in anyone else I don’t already trust (such as Hazel, my parents, and my grandparents). Jack may not be a lover (in fact, he will never be a lover), but he can still betray me at any time.

“So what’s the plan?” I ask, changing the subject. “No doubt Dad orchestrated a plan and trusted you with it. That being said, I’m all ears.”

“Actually, he didn’t give me a plan,” Jack shakes his head. “He just sent me out and expected me to plan one out with you once I found you.”

Honestly, I’m not surprised by this. “So he threw you in at the deep end, huh?” I snort. “Yup, that’s Dad for you.” I immediately think of that time a few weeks ago, when Dad gave me the critical job of keeping a scared and angry group of Cavemen villagers from causing trouble (as well as burning me at the stake as a sacrifice to their gods) while he was off stopping a small group of aliens—who the villagers thought to be their gods that they’d somehow angered, hence why they attempted to burn me as a sacrifice to appease their wrath—from terrorizing them and rewriting history. Needless to say, I still haven’t entirely forgiven Dad for putting me in that situation, especially without any guidance whatsoever.

“I suppose,” Jack shrugs. “Anyway, since you’d been here a bit longer than me, I figured you’d have a plan by now. By now you should know your way around the prison like the back of your hand, you being here a little over a week.”

“Are you kidding?” I scoff in offense. “I’ve barely had time to, since I’ve been so busy trying to keep myself alive. Or did you forget that literally everyone here wants to kill me just for being the Doctor’s daughter?”

“Hey, I’m sorry,” Jack says, putting his hands up in surrender. “I didn’t realize how bad this has been for you. If I’d found you sooner, I’d have gotten you outta here a long time ago, but I never knew where you were since I never knew where your cell was; and even if I’d found it, you were never there when I went to look for you.”

“That’s coz I was hiding,” I point out. “I didn’t want to be found, lest I’d be killed for absolutely no reason.” I pause before sighing. “I suppose it’s really my fault it’s taken so long to leave this place. Dad said he’d send someone out to look for me, but since so many people have tried to kill me since I’ve been here, I was too scared to let anyone near me, including anyone he’d send to find me and get me out. As I said, I can’t trust anyone anymore. Everyone I meet, they either are working for the Silence and want to turn me over to their side just like my mother, or they want to straight-up kill me just for being me. It’s ridiculous!” I pause again, once again thinking of the Shopkeeper’s words about me being betrayed by someone close to me. “These days, I don’t think I’ll be able to trust my own friends anymore. I was already told recently that someone would betray me in my near future.”

“You don’t think that person is me, do you?” Jack frowns. “Coz I’d never betray you. Betraying you would mean I betray your father as well, and I’d never do that. He’s my dearest friend, and any dear friend or family member of his is a dear friend to me. I’d never betray my friends, certainly not him or you. I swear on my life.”

‘I’d never betray anyone. I swear on my life.’ Famous last words of someone who will end up betraying everyone anyway, whether it’s intentional or not.

On that thought, I shrug, saying, “Sorry, Jack, but it’s gonna take a hell of a lot of convincing to make me believe you. You have absolutely no idea what all I’ve been through, not just here. I’ve been through way worse than this.”

Being forced to keep a dangerous secret and dealing with the paranoia of it being discovered, no matter how well I kept the secret… Having my worst enemy, Madame Kovarian, slip through my fingers because of my stubbornness and arrogance to take her down with no prior experience… Watching my guardians sacrifice their lives for me without being able to do anything to stop or save them… These are literally the worst things to ever happen to me; being betrayed by literally anyone, nor being falsely put in prison, doesn’t even come close.

“I do know,” Jack nods. “Your dad told me your story, at least bits and pieces of it. How you were raised on Earth with a secret you struggled to keep hidden from the rest of the world—a secret you barely understood the origins of. How you struggled to fit in with your life as a non-human, despite having to keep that secret, and especially after you discovered the truth about your origins once you met your true parents. How scared you were when your guardians were kidnapped by the Silence to get to you. How your guardians gave their lives to save you. Trust me, I know what it feels like to feel alone as you are. I’ve lost people too—my partner…my grandson…”

I gasp. Oh my god, he lost his grandson? That must’ve been awful. If only I’d known…

“Sometimes I feel responsible for their deaths,” he continues with a  sad sigh, “but I try to move on as much as I can and try to put the guilt behind me. Your dad knows how much of a struggle that’s been for you. As you said, you’ve been through a lot, much like your dad. As I said, you have a lot of him in you. Don’t worry. You won’t be betrayed by anyone anytime soon, certainly not me. I will get you out of here in one way or another, and I will die trying if I have to.”

“You better come back if you do,” I chuckle and smile in an attempt to cheer him up.

“Trust me, I plan to,” he chuckles back.

“Okay, so how’re we getting out of here?” I ask, steering back on topic. “As I said, I’m not leaving until I get my sonic screwdriver back first.”

“I don’t know yet,” he sighs, “but I’ll think of something. The easiest way is by Vortex Manipulator, which, luckily for us, I own, but I’m not sure where they’re keeping it. They must be keeping it with your sonic screwdriver.”

“They put trackers in us when we first arrived,” I add, suddenly remembering. “I heard that it sends a painful shock through your body if you attempt to escape the prison’s walls, and it shocks you continuously until you return or if it kills you. We need to remove them before we leave. Again, my sonic could do that easily. It’s got a magnetism setting that could pull the tracker out safely.”

Jack nods. “Alright, we’ll definitely need to do that. But first thing’s first, we need to find a way to sweettalk the guards into letting us snoop around in their Property Office to get our stuff back.”

“Yeah right!” I scoff. “Like they’d ‘let’ us casually steal our stuff back and leave peacefully. Not a chance!”

“Hey, you’d be surprised at how persuasive I can be,” Jack shrugs in a ‘what could go wrong?’ manner.

“This coming from a guy who had his neck snapped for doing just that back at the cafeteria,” I frown back at him. Sure, he’s immortal, so if it happens again and he dies, he’ll just come back; no big deal, right?

WRONG, as, for all we know, the next time it happens might not be something he comes back from.

“Okay, fair point,” he sighs. “In any case, I’m sure we can figure something out.”

Before we have a chance to do just that, a loud announcement is heard over the loudspeakers. “Attention all inmates! Please gather in the Atrium for a mandatory meeting!”

“Huh,” I snort to myself. “That’s literally the first time I’ve heard anyone say ‘please’ here.”

“A mandatory meeting, huh?” Jack says, glancing nervously at me as we walk toward the Atrium with the other inmates that have gathered before us. “I wonder what that’s about. What do you think?”

“I don’t know,” I say, feeling just as nervous, if not more so, “but I doubt it’s anything good. Most aren’t; at least ones I’ve been to.” I immediately think back to the last mandatory meeting I attended at the Silence base where I witnessed my mother, River Song, while under mind-control, threaten to kill my best friend, Hazel, just to draw me out into the open and turn myself in. Dear God, I sure hope this one is not anything like that one.

As always, the universe really has it out for me, because once we reach the Atrium and I glance up at the balcony where the meetings are usually announced by the Warden or anyone else who runs the prison (most announcers, of course, being Judoon), instead, I see the one person I hoped to never see again, at least in any form that’s not a pile of mashed potatoes on the floor.

“No way!” I abruptly stop in my tracks, lowering my voice to a growl. “You’ve got to be kidding me! What the fuck is she doing here?”

Scratch that! I shake my head at myself. I know exactly what she’s doing here. It’s obvious what she’s doing here. What she’s been doing for the past several months, ever since her base was destroyed… What she’s been doing my entire life…

I stare up with malice and contempt at the wicked face (if that’s even her real face) of Madame Kovarian, who looks down on the crowd, scanning for potential targets…

Specifically, me.

Chapter Text

“Who?” Jack frowns at me. He then follows my gaze to Kovarian up on the balcony, overlooking everyone. “Her?”

“Who else?” I growl. There’s literally nobody worse in the entire universe (at least that I know of) than Madame Kovarian. Who else would be callous enough to take an innocent child and raise the child into a psycho-killer? I can’t imagine a worse deed than this.

“I dunno,” Jack shrugs. “Never seen her before. Who is she?”

“Madame Kovarian. She leads the Silence—Vokanari, whatever.”

“‘Kovarian’… Wait, that name sounds familiar. You accused me of working with someone who went by that name. I take it that’s her, and she’s bad news?”

I scoff. “Oh, the worst of the worst. She’s the reason why I’m here…at least, I’m pretty sure she is. No doubt she falsely accused me for murder and had me sent here as a way to keep me from escaping her this time.” Of course Kovarian had arranged the entire murder and made sure that I would be blamed and sent to this prison specifically, knowing it’d be impossible to escape the prison with trackers in the inmates’ bodies that allow the guards to know where everyone is at all times. The guards always knew where I was, regardless of where I hid, which meant that there was really nowhere for me to hide. “Now she’s here for me. She’s trying to draw me out; that’s why she had everyone gather here. Just like last time.” This statement instantly makes me think of the ‘mandatory meeting’ at the Silence base, except then there were no trackers. Here, there are, which would make it a gazillion times easier for Kovarian to find me; all she’d have to do is ask the guards, and they’d point her straight to me in an instant. I take a step back, a small wave of fear suddenly washing over me. “She can’t find me here. She’ll force me onto their side again; force me to kill Dad again. I refuse to do that.” But then a split second later, that fear is replaced with anger. “The only person I want to kill is her. She needs to pay for what she did to us. For what she’s done to me my whole life!”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Jack asks hesitantly. “You just said you didn’t want her to find you.”

But I don’t care. Not anymore. “No,” I say, changing my mind, “I want her to find me. I want her to pay for what she did to us. I want her to see the anger in my eyes when I kill her.” I don’t care if this version of Kovarian is another Flesh Avatar. I’m willing to kill her as many times as it takes until the real Kovarian is killed, and I never plan to stop.

Jack begins pulling me back as he says, “Okay, that’s definitely not a good idea. I have a better idea, and that’s to get you back to your dad. We can worry about this ‘Kovarian’ chick another day. Let’s focus on getting out of here for now. I’ve already got an idea to—”

“Greetings, galactic warlords,” Kovarian begins speaking out to the crowd, “cold-blooded murderers, destroyers of worlds, and other various foul-smelling imbeciles…” At this, I can’t help but snort at her joke, which I chastise myself for immediately after, thinking it’s wrong to laugh at an enemy’s joke.

Kovarian continues her speech. “I know this isn’t the normal sort of announcement that many of you were expecting, but I can assure you that the wardens gave me permission to speak above you and in person. I am well aware that many of you don’t know me and are curious as to the reasoning for my presence. I am known as Madame Kovarian, and I am here to offer you a chance of freedom.”

I glance around at the other inmates who mutter to each other, wondering if Kovarian’s promise for their freedom is legit. Not really, I scoff in my head, unless you want to forget everything about your previous lives and become even more deadly killers than you already are. Then again, this may be exactly what most of these people want. I overhear a couple of inmates snort at the idea, thinking that their so-called ‘freedom’ comes with a catch.

Of course, Kovarian seems to sense this from them, as she says in a knowing tone, “Of course, your freedom comes with a catch. No doubt, most of you are here for one reason—because someone foiled your plans, that ‘someone’ being a certain Time Lord known as ‘The Doctor.’”

More mutters from the inmates. I even catch a few glances toward me at the mention of my father.

“No doubt, most of you are eager to enact your revenge on him; more than that, to destroy his very existence. I, myself, have that same goal, and we know how difficult it is to kill him. But I can assure you that we can make this shared goal an accomplishment by working together. I am offering you the chance to earn your freedom by joining a noble cause—Silence. By joining us—by joining me—you can get your chance to legitimately silence the Doctor once and for all. More than that, should you succeed, you will be showered in gold and praised beyond imagination.”

Yeah right! I immediately respond in my head. Absolutely no way can that last bit be legit, knowing how sadistic and manipulative Kovarian is. Regardless, all inmates cheer their approval, seemingly not caring if Kovarian’s words are sound or not.

“Together, we will rid the universe of the Time Lord plague once and for all!” Kovarian says, smirking down on her new followers. “Together, with the Doctor and every other Time Lord dead, we will become the new gods! We will be unstoppable! Who’s with me?” All inmates cheer once again, showing their loyalty to the Silence. “Then follow me to victory!” Kovarian says, nodding her approval. “Follow me to freedom!” The inmates cheer one final time; meanwhile, Jack and I stand there with malice and contempt.

“Perfect,” Jack says as he tugs on my arm as the rest of the inmates gather closer to the balcony. “This is exactly the kind of distraction we need. While everyone’s busy following Madame Eye-Patch, we can escape a different way. Now all we have to worry about are the guards. Come on, I know where their Property Office is.”

“No,” I snap, standing my ground and continuing to stare up at Kovarian with extreme hatred.

“‘No?’” Jack exclaims, appalled. “What do you mean, ‘no?’ We have a higher chance to escape now. We can’t pass it up. If we don’t take the chance to escape now, we may not get a chance to escape again. It’s now or never.”

“I said no!” I say a little more firmly. “I’m not escaping! Not yet.”

“What the hell are you waiting for?!” he says, incredulous by my choice to stay in this godforsaken place rather than leave, which would be the smarter option. “We can’t stay here another minute, and you certainly can’t stay here or she’ll find you.”

“I already told you,” I say, finally turning to Jack. “I want her to find me! She needs to pay for what she did to my family! They all do! I’m not going to pass a chance to take her down once and for all! I’ll take her down first, before she has a chance to touch Dad, and especially Mom again!” I made a personal Unbreakable Vow to myself that I would do this the next time I saw Kovarian’s face. I turn back to Kovarian and begin approaching her with the other inmates, ignoring Jack.

“Nova, you can’t!” he says, pulling me back round to face him again. “She’ll kill you!”

“Not unless I kill her first!” I say, yanking my arm away. “And that’s what I intend to do!”

“No!” he says, this time holding me by the shoulders, preventing me from turning around. “I can’t let you do this, and if your dad was here, he wouldn’t let you either! He certainly wouldn’t!”

“He couldn’t stop me before,” I point out, thinking of when I snuck past him to the Silence base per the TARDIS’s help. “He certainly can’t stop me now, especially since he’s not here! I won’t let you stop me either, and I’m certainly not going to let her turn you into a cold-blooded killer too! Let go!” I attempt to pull away from him once more, but his grip on my shoulders is too tight—tight enough to make my arms go numb.

“No!” Jack says again, squeezing my arms even tighter. “I swore to your old man I’d protect you. We’re getting out of here in one way or another, even if I have to drag you away from that witch myself! Come on!”

He begins forcefully dragging me away when a deep voice interrupts us from behind. “You two ain’t goin’ anywhere! Especially you, Time Lady!”

I turn my head round to see Mr. Evil Eye—rather, Marco—standing there, and sigh, rolling my eyes. Great, this guy is back. I thought he’d learned by now. Obviously not. Nobody ever learns.

I remember Dad telling me how those who don’t listen to him usually end up paying the price, usually in Death. After making a similar threat in the cafeteria yesterday, the fact that Marco is here to harass me yet again shows that my threat didn’t faze him in the slightest. Honestly, looking back, I didn’t really expect it to, anyway.

“Hello, Jack,” Marco says, smiling up at the Captain. “It’s been a while. Why’d you leave me so unexpectedly? I thought we had a good connection.” His last statement makes me realize that he’s referring to their previous relationship—if ever there was one. I honestly don’t know what happened there, and I don’t care to know.

“Come on, man,” Jack sighs, ignoring his ex’s comment, “haven’t you tormented this young lady long enough? Just leave her alone!”

Marco snorts. “Not even close! Not until every single Time Lord remaining is driven to extinction once and for all! Starting with the Doctor!” He then says, glancing back down at me, “I know of the Silence. I know they want to destroy the Doctor as much as the rest of the universe. I’ve heard rumors of their plans to use you to silence him—his own daughter. How I would give anything to see that happen with my own eyes. And what a great privilege it would be to be ‘showered in gold’ after I turn you in.”

“Not a chance, Marco,” Jack growls, pulling me back. “She’s not going anywhere with them; certainly not with you. You better back off right now before things get ugly.”

“I’d like to see you try, Harkness,” Marco sniggers. “Didn’t work out so well for you last time, did it?”

“I wasn’t talking about me,” Jack shakes his head before glancing briefly at me, indicating my ‘outburst’ in the cafeteria.

Marco is silent for a few seconds before snorting in disapproval. “Well, that little ‘light show’ may have been impressive, but at the end of the day, you got off lucky.”

“That wasn’t luck,” I say, glaring at him seriously. “I meant to do that. What, you asking to do ‘two out of three’?” It’s on, bro! I snort, deepening my frown, seriously doubting that he’d win a second round. Admittedly, a large part of me wants to do the same to Kovarian, since she tricked me last time, and I’ve wanted to get back at her the next time I saw her face. Perhaps now I can finally get that opportunity.

“Nova! Stop!” Jack says, pulling me back again a little more firmly. “Let’s go!”

Suddenly, it’s Marco who grabs my arm this time. “As I said, Jack, you two ain’t goin’ anywhere! Not until Lady Eye-Patch says so. In fact, I have a feeling she won’t let anyone leave ‘til you are turned in to her. No doubt she knows you’re here.”

I don’t disagree, I think but do not say, now— “Let me go!” I continue my thought out loud, tugging my arm away from him, but his grip is much tighter than Jack’s.

“Not a chance, princess,” Marco chuckles, gripping my wrist so tightly I begin losing feeling in my hand due to lack of blood-flow. “I’m getting out of here one way or another, and I’m taking you with me.”

“You’re not taking her anywhere without going through me first!” Jack snaps, stepping forward.

“As I said, Jack,” his ex sniggers again, “I’d like to see you try. You won’t last a second against us, just like last time. I don’t know how you survived last time, but I guarantee you won’t stop us this time.” He then says, addressing his cronies, “Come on, boys! Let’s show these ‘Silence’ what we’re really made of! OI, EYE-PATCH! I HAVE SOMEONE HERE WHO’S AN OLD FRIEND OF YOURS! A CERTAIN TIME LADY! WANNA MEET HER?” He screams this last bit toward Kovarian as he begins dragging me toward the center of the Atrium for her to see as his cronies grab Jack and force him to hopelessly watch.

“No!” Jack screams as he struggles against his captors’ grasp to get at me. “Marco, you can’t do this! She’s just a kid! She’s not a killer! Don’t make her one!”

Technically I’m in my thirties now, I respond in my head, thinking of my horrible experience in my coma during Dad’s and my previous adventure. Though, in my book, I’m still nineteen.

I don’t say or do anything, thinking Marco will bring me straight to Kovarian. Thankfully, I still have my knife hidden in my pocket, and I plan to use it on Kovarian when I get the chance.

“What is the meaning of this interruption?” Kovarian frowns as she glances down at the crowd of inmates in an attempt to pinpoint the culprit.

“I warned you that you wouldn’t be so lucky next time, princess,” Marco whispers in my ear in a threatening tone. “There’s no-one to save you now, not even Jack. You made a big mistake to trust him. He’s not the ‘valiant knight in shining armor’ you think he is. Like your father, Death follows Jack everywhere, and the longer you continue trusting him, the quicker Death will come for you.”

“You’re wrong,” I growl back. “Like my father, Jack is a good man.”

One of the major things I’ve learned about Jack that he has in common with my father is that they both have had bad things happen to them, and some things both of them were at fault, but they both found a way to redeem themselves later on in their lives. I know Dad has certainly redeemed himself since the Last Great Time War, and many other times when he’s lost people, but I’m not so sure about Jack. I’m quite sure Jack has found ways to redeem himself as Dad has, especially after losing his partner and grandson. Of course, I don’t mention this out loud, but I know, as Jack said previously, Dad wouldn’t have sent Jack to rescue me if he didn’t trust him, so based on that fact alone, Dad must sense some good in Jack.

“Like it matters now,” Marco snorts carelessly. “I’m sure these ‘Silence’ have a much worse fate set for you and your daddy; and I, for one, can’t wait to watch.”

Yeah, you would, I sigh, rolling my eyes, as I watch Kovarian glance around and eventually catch my death-glare, apparently recognizing me straight away despite me having regenerated since she last saw me.

“Nova, dearie,” she smirks at me, and I instantly cringe at the nickname. “At last. How wonderful to see you again. I see you’ve had a bit of work done since we last met. I hope prison has been treating you well, just like your mother.”

“Yeah, prison’s been going great!” I reply in a sarcastic drawl. “Food’s great, people are great; I’d rate this place four out of five stars! Thanks for asking!” I would legitimately rate it five out of five stars if Kovarian was the one in prison instead of me. Or, better yet, dead, I add in a growl in my head. I can feel the weight of the knife in my pocket just itching to be plunged into Kovarian’s abdomen, much like the butter knife I attempted to use at the Silence base. “How’s yourself?” I speak up again. “You’re looking better after being reduced to a pile of century-old mashed potatoes!”

Ready for Round 2? I add once again in a growl. Better yet, wanna be reduced to Strawberry Jam instead? I brought a knife for just such an occasion. Sure, that’s exactly what a psychopath would think; you can blame the Silence for putting that thought in my head.

“My, Nova,” Kovarian says in mock-shock, “what a twisted mind you have. You Time Lords were always known to be quite demented, no matter what your age. Like Father, like Daughter.”

I shrug, my voice still dripping with sarcasm. “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe I got my ‘demented mind’ from my mother. You did train her into a psychopath, after all, just like all the rest of you freaks. It’s no surprise you’re planning to turn the rest of these people into even bigger psychopaths than they already are. If you think you can get away with this, this time, you’re wrong! I’ll make sure you fail this time!”

More than that, I’ll make sure you die this time! I add but do not say out loud.

Kovarian chuckles in doubt, as does the rest of the prison. “Oh, I hardly think you are capable of that, young lady.”

“You wanna bet?” I growl as my eyes glow once again with Regeneration Energy. A few inmates nearby, including Marco who actually releases me for a moment, step back in fear, well aware of my highly explosive powers. In fact, I am pretty sure I could quite easily use my powers to end Kovarian right no—

ARGH!

I am interrupted mid-thought when I suddenly feel a massive electric charge from the damn tracker in my shoulder which sends a shock of pain through my body. I scream in pain and lose the will to stand as I fall weak in Marco’s arms. At this point, the electric shock finally stops, and I look up with blurry eyes to see a trigger in a guard’s hand who stands next to Kovarian. I see Kovarian nod her approval toward the guard as if she ordered him to use the trigger to zap my tracker to physically weaken me.

“Stand down, you naive child!” Kovarian sighs, rolling her eyes. “You and I both know you’re in no position to stop me, or really anyone here. One click of this trigger, and it sends an electric shock through your body from the tracker, paralyzing it for a short time; or, in some cases, it can cause Death. Any attempt to escape—or do anything, really—is impossible. I suggest that you choose your fate a little more wisely in future.” She chuckles when I am unable to answer. “In fact, your fate has already been decided. Welcome back to the family, ‘Nova Susan Song: The New Woman to Kill the Doctor.’ I think it’s time you officially joined us, as has been your true destiny.” She then says, this time addressing the rest of the prison, “The same goes for the rest of you! You want your chance to finally rid the universe of the Time Lord plague once and for all?” All inmates cheer in unison, and she smiles. “Excellent! Then I say once more… Follow me to victory! Follow me to freedom!”

“Seems your ‘luck’ has finally run out,” Marco sniggers in my ear as he begins half-dragging, half-carrying me with him and the rest of the inmates. “Not so powerful now, are you, sweet-cheeks? As I said, I’m getting out of here one way or another, and I’m taking you with me. It would be my great pleasure to turn you in and watch you Time Lord scum finally driven to extinction once and for all.”

As a result from the electric charge, everything thereafter becomes a blur. I don’t remember much that follows aside from being dragged along with the other inmates. I briefly remember being presented to Kovarian when it seems to come Marco’s turn to ‘sign up’ to join the Silence, and Kovarian ordered one of the humanoid guards to take me to a seemingly private room that Kovarian temporarily uses, and I am shoved aggressively to the floor, which, in all honesty, is a huge mercy. With no strength whatsoever, I just lay there, hopelessly awaiting my fate as I stare up at the ceiling that fades in and out of darkness. After some time, I manage to gain back my senses as Kovarian enters the room with me, and it seems to be just the two of us, as no-one else seems to enter after her.

“My dear Nova…” she tuts as she looms over me. “You’ve been a very naughty girl, haven’t you? Imprisoned for the murder of King Astorvox of Margonia. Your parents would be very disappointed in you.”

“Liar!” I attempt to yell, but it comes out in a weak croak instead. “You…framed me. You were the one…who killed him.”

“You are half-right,” Kovarian replies. “Another assassin I hired actually killed him. Perhaps you’ve been told of the Zygons? A very talented race of shapeshifters with a very fowl-smelling aroma. They can shape-shift into anyone in the universe…even you.”

I frown in disbelief. “So…you had this ‘Zygon’…take my form…and make it look…like I killed the King?”

Kovarian nods. “Precisely. And once the Shadow Proclamation found out, I knew they would send you to either Stormcage Containment Facility or the Judoon Prison. Seeing as you already have a family history at Stormcage, what with your mother having been imprisoned there, they knew and I knew it would be too easy for you to escape, so I made sure you would be brought here instead. I knew there would be no way for you to escape me with that tracker in your back. And now here you are…as my prisoner now. Speaking of which, I think it’s time we removed your tracker. You won’t need it anymore, now that you’re in my claws permanently.”

At this point, I begin to gather more strength as I attempt to sit up. “So this was your next attempt to force me to kill Dad?” I growl as Kovarian approaches me with a strange utensil she will use to remove my tracker. “Frame me for murder…send me to a prison you knew I couldn’t escape…and then come to said prison to collect me and turn me into the weapon you always planned for me to become?”

“That, and raise my army back to what it was before your foolish guardian obliterated most of them!” Kovarian adds as she slides the sleeve of my jumpsuit down to get at the tracker above my shoulder blade.

“Would you be surprised to know that it was originally my idea?” I smirk at her, wondering how she would react to that fact. “It was supposed to have been me who detonated the bombs, not her! I was going to do it to save her from you freaks, as well as destroy you once and for all! I was never going to let you harm my family again!” Of course this was before I found out she was a Flesh Avatar all along.

There is an old saying that states: ‘Curiosity killed the cat.’ Apparently, I have firsthand experience with that very statement, as my curiosity almost quite literally gets me killed in that moment. Well, it doesn’t kill me, per se, but it does cause me much physical pain in the form of Kovarian stabbing me in the shoulder with her strange utensil in an attempt to remove my tracker.

“Sadly, you failed on that front!” she growls in anger. “And you will fail again!” She twists the thingamajig deeper into my shoulder, ignoring the orange-red blood staining her hands and my jumpsuit (though, thankfully you can’t really tell, as my jumpsuit is already red). Once the tracker is finally out, my shoulder instantly begins glowing with Regeneration Energy, and once Kovarian sees this, she immediately and aggressively throws me down hard to the floor. “You’ve already failed!” she growls as she watches me continue to heal myself. “You’re my prisoner now! There’s no one to save you this time!”

As she says all of this, I glance up, and I instantly grin as I see Captain Jack Harkness having somehow snuck inside the room past all of the guards, thankfully unbeknownst to Kovarian as she has her back to him.

“You’re wrong!” I growl at her as he quietly slinks up to her from behind with a small revolver in hand. “There is one person that could save me!”

At this, she instantly reaches out to me and wraps her fingers tightly around my throat. “If your father wants to save you,” she sneers spitefully, “he’ll have to come to us to win you back, and we’ll be waiting! He won’t succeed! Not this time!”

I manage to choke out, spitting in Kovarian’s face, as Jack raises his gun to her back, “I wasn’t talking about my father.”

“She was talking about me, bitch!” Jack speaks up before he shoots her in the shoulder, and she falls to the floor in pain.

“Jack!” I exclaim after I manage to gain my voice and breath back. “Perfect timing!”

“Hey, kid!” Jack smiles as he helps me to my feet. “Didn’t think I was gonna abandon ya, did ya?”

I shake my head. “Of course not. How did you escape?”

Jack shrugs. “Let’s just say it wasn’t easy, but I managed it…barely.” Speaking of which, I notice a few new bloodstains on Jack’s jumpsuit and face, seemingly from a fight (or two) with Marco’s cronies and the prison guards. “Anyway, here,” he shrugs again in a careless manner as he reaches into his pocket and tosses to me my sonic screwdriver that he had somehow acquired from the Property Office. “I imagine you’re gonna wanna have this back.”

“Thanks,” I smile as I take the sonic from him and place it in my own pocket. “I take it you were able to ‘sweet-talk the guards’ at the Property Office into getting our stuff back?”

He shrugs again. “Well, I wouldn’t really call it ‘sweet-talk,’ but sure, we’ll go with that. Come on. Now that your tracker’s out, we need to get you out of here pronto.”

“Not yet,” I shake my head. “There’s something I have to do first.” Something I’ve been waiting to do my whole life, I add but don’t say out loud. I turn to Kovarian and take out my knife as I approach her with it.

“Whoa! Kid, what’re you doing?” Jack exclaims, seeing what I’m about to do and seems to disapprove of my plans, but I don’t care. He doesn’t understand how much pain and misery Kovarian and the Silence have put me and my family through.

“She has to pay for what she did to us!” I growl. “I have to see to it that she never harms us again! It’s the only way!”

“Nova, you can’t!” Jack says, pulling me back. “You’re not a killer! I won’t let you be one! Don’t become one now!”

“Oh, let her do what she pleases,” Kovarian sniggers while grunting in pain. “After all…her father’s not here to stop her.”

“He may not be, but I am,” Jack snaps as he begins tugging forcefully on my arm. “Nova, let’s go!” But I ignore him still.

“I can see the hatred burning in your eyes,” Kovarian continues sniggering at me, taunting me with every word, daring me to end her life. “I can hear the anger pulsing with every beat of your hearts. You want to punish me for putting you in this mess…kill me for all the pain I put your loved ones through… Do it. This has always been your destiny.”

Her words instantly make me think back on Multi-Eyes’ words from my first adventure with my father, the moment after he had succumbed to his injuries that she had inflicted on him: “Do it! I dare you! Strike me down, just like we’ve always taught you! Do us proud, little Time Lot! Become one of us! It is your destiny!” Her words and Kovarian’s words also make me think of all the other times I was told that I was destined to do or become something (not just a psychopath), but I never once believed anyone, not even my father whenever he would talk about the responsibilities I would have to take on as a Time Lord and as his successor one day. I’m pretty sure I have a right to choose my own destiny, no matter what Time says.

Time is not the boss of me (Rule #408), and neither is anyone else!

At this point, I take notice of the familiar white substance that leaks out of Kovarian’s shoulder where she was shot, and I recognize it to be that from a Flesh Avatar, like what I saw in my parents’ memories.

Are you flippin’ kidding me?!

“I don’t believe in destiny!” I snap at her. “I’m sick of being told who and what I should be! Time is not the boss of me…”

Nor is my dad… I add in my head, thinking of him telling me how to live my life as a Time Lord, how living like a normal human is no longer possible for me with my extended knowledge and advanced Deviant powers, and how much I want to prove him wrong one day.

“And neither are you!” I finish before I swiftly snatch Jack’s revolver from his hand and shoot Kovarian in the face, reducing her yet again to a pile of glop on the floor.

I growl loudly at the fact that Kovarian had tricked me again in the exact same way as last time, egging me on to shoot her just to show she was never real. “FUCK!” I scream into the open air as I slam the gun down on the floor in intense rage. “WHY WON’T YOU EVER SHOW YOUR REAL FACE, YOU FUCKING COWARD?!”

“Nova!” Jack speaks up as he rushes to pick up his gun and attempts to calm me. “Forget it! We have to go! Now! Come on!”

“The next time I see her face,” I continue fuming and cursing as my eyes glow gold with rage, “whether it’s real or another fucking avatar, I’m gonna kill it! Slowly! And then, I’m gonna take out her eyes and shove them up her—”

“Okay!” Jack speaks up again, stopping me. “I get it! You want to get back at her for tricking you, but now’s not the time! Right now, we need to focus on getting out of here! I managed to get my Vortex Manipulator back! We should be able to use it once we get past the Security Field!”

“But won’t that activate your tracker?” I frown, my eyes reverting back to normal due to my concern for Jack. “You’ll die if we don’t remove it!”

“Nah, it’s fine,” he shakes his head. “You forget, I can’t die, not permanently. If it ends up stopping my heart, it’ll eventually restart itself. It always seems to; don’t ask me how. Come on! Let’s go!” He then grabs my hand, and we run, leaving Kovarian’s Avatar’s slimy puddle behind.

As we run, we dodge guards and Judoon who try to stop us as well as kill us. Any guards and Judoon that do attempt to stop us, Jack shoots back at them with his revolver. Thankfully, most of the inmates have left at this point, having gone with Kovarian’s followers to join them.

“Hurry!” Jack exclaims, pointing to the end of the hallway through a large opened doorway. “The exit is just there! Once you step over the threshold, you’ll be able to use the Vortex Manipulator to zap away! Go!” He says this as he hands me a leather bracelet that I instantly recognize as a Vortex Manipulator, similar to the one my mother often uses, and pushes me ahead of him.

“No!” I stop in my tracks. “I’m not leaving without you!”

“You have to!” Jack insists. “My only job was to get you back to your dad by any means necessary, even if it means I have to stay behind!”

“No!” I say again. “I’m not leaving! We’re getting out of here together!”

“We can’t!” he shakes his head as he shoots back at the Judoon and other guards trying to flank us. “Once I cross the threshold, my tracker will activate, which might shorten out the Manipulator! If that happens, it’ll be useless, and we’ll never get out of here!” He says, pushing the time-travel device against my chest, “There is no other way out of this! You have to go! I’ll buy you some time! Don’t worry, the coordinates are already set and should take you straight into the TARDIS! Just push this button! Go now!”

“Jack, please—” I continue to protest, my eyes filling with tears.

“Go! I’ll be fine! Tell your dad it was great to see him again, that his latest body looks fantastic, and that he and the missus are lucky to have an amazing daughter like you!”

His words make me sob more, as well as make me more desperate not to leave him behind, to lose him. His words also make me think of my mother-guardian who said goodbye in a similar manner. “Jack—”

“Go!” he insists once more. “Don’t worry about me, kid; we’ll see each other again…one day. GO NOW!”

At this point, I have no choice but to obey as I rush through the opened doorway to the prison’s exit. The instant I cross the threshold, I grip Jack’s Vortex Manipulator in my hand and activate it just like I’ve always seen my mother do it, and I instantly feel a tingling sensation as I zap out of existence, leaving Jack behind, just as I’ve done to my mother-guardian.

Chapter Text

When I open my eyes again, I immediately recognize the hexagonal-shaped hallway as being one in the TARDIS, the same hallway as where my bedroom is. I sigh in extreme relief to be back in a familiar place as I rush to the Control Room where, thankfully, I find my father seemingly charging his sonic screwdriver at the console.

“Dad!” I call out as I run down the stairs to him.

“Nova?!” he gasps and whips around, not expecting to hear my voice deep inside the ship and obviously confused as to how I ended up back here. “How did you get there? Where—”

“Dad, it’s Jack!” I say, in absolute hysterics, as I wrap my arms around him and bury my face in his chest. “We have to go back and save him!”

He frowns, seeming puzzled. “Jack? Jack Harkness? Where is he?”

“He stayed behind!” I explain as I lift my wrist up to show Jack’s Vortex Manipulator. “He gave me his Vortex Manipulator! We have to go back for him! Please, we need to hurry! The guards could kill him, or the Silence could catch him and turn him over! We have to stop them! Please! I can’t leave him!”

“Okay, Nova, calm down,” Dad says, rubbing my back soothingly. “Give me his Vortex Manipulator. I can connect it to the TARDIS to find his exact whereabouts. We can try to materialize around him.”

“No!” I gasp, suddenly remembering his tracker that’s still imbedded in his body. “He still has his tracker in him! He needs to have it removed before he can leave the prison’s borders! It’ll activate and kill him if it’s not removed first!”

“Don’t worry,” he assures me as he takes Jack’s Vortex Manipulator from me and hooks it to the TARDIS console. “We’ll remove it the second he’s in the TARDIS. He’ll be fine as long as we’re quick. Brace yourself!” He immediately sets the Old Girl to fly to the exact coordinates where I last left Jack, and the ship rumbles and shudders upon command. “We landed!” Dad says a few seconds later as the ship settles once more. “We’ll need to be quick; we only have a few seconds before the Judoon lock the TARDIS down and we’ll be unable to leave!” He immediately runs to the door, and I follow close behind, but he turns and stops me. “No, Nova, you stay! I can handle this!”

I reluctantly do what he says as he opens the door and rushes outside. We both see Jack continue to shoot back at the guards and Space-Rhinos as I last left him seconds ago. I watch through the opened TARDIS door as Dad calls out to Jack, and once Jack sees us, he immediately begins running toward us at full sprint, completely disregarding his own safety. Once he reaches about halfway to us, Jack’s tracker activates in the form of an intense electrical burst that envelops his body and immediately sends him to the floor in pain.

“Jack!” I automatically call out to him and begin running to him, but Dad stops me yet again, holding out a hand in a ‘stop’ motion.

“No, Nova, I’ll go! Stay there!”

I continue helplessly watching from the TARDIS as Dad reaches Jack and hoists him up to his feet, wrapping his arm around his shoulder. I see Dad wince slightly from Jack’s tracker while Jack continues screaming in agony. I swiftly step back as the two men reenter the TARDIS, and once they do, Jack immediately faceplants to the floor, his body going limp, which automatically makes me fear the worst. His tracker stops sparking with electricity the moment he impacts with the floor.

“Quick, Nova, give me your sonic!” Dad commands as he gently pulls Jack’s jumpsuit down to reveal the tracker in his shoulder. “I need to remove his tracker!”

I hand it over without question, my eyes filling with tears and bottom lip quivering in fear as he begins sonicking Jack’s tracker out of him. “Come on, Jack, me old mate…” Dad mutters as he works quickly and carefully. “Stay with us…”

I kneel down beside them as Dad continues working. At this point, I can’t help but sob uncontrollably and think we’ll legitimately lose Jack, despite his immortality and the possibility that it had finally run out. “Jack, please, don’t leave us…” I whimper through my fingertips as I bite at my nails nervously. “Please don’t die…”

“He’ll be fine, Nova,” Dad assures me. “I’ve almost got the tracker out. Don’t touch him ’til it’s out.” I can see the tracker slowly lifting itself out of Jack’s shoulder blade and staining the infected area with blood.

“You touched him and barely felt anything,” I point out, remembering how he seemed to barely feel a tingle from Jack’s tracker when it was sparking his body with electricity.

“That’s because Time Lord bodies are able to withstand significant amounts of electricity,” Dad explains before exclaiming, “Got it!” once the device in Jack’s shoulder pops out like a cork from a wine bottle and seems to attach itself to my sonic like a magnet. Once Dad releases the button on the screwdriver, the tracker falls harmlessly into his palm. “Now we wait,” he says as he hands me back my sonic, gently flips Jack on his side, rises to his feet, and returns to the console, setting a different course (the TARDIS had flown herself away from the prison on autopilot while Dad was tending to Jack).

I remain by Jack’s side as I wait for him to wake up on his own, knowing he can’t truly die…or so he claimed. A few seconds pass, and he still doesn’t move; I honestly can’t tell if he’s breathing or not. “Come on, Jack…” I whisper in a calm voice as I rub the side of his arm soothingly. “Please don’t die… Please wake up…”

Another thirty seconds go by, and he still doesn’t wake, and at this point I am starting to get concerned, no longer believing that Jack could simply be ‘playing opossum’ as a fowl prank. “Jack! Jack, come on, this isn’t funny anymore! Please just wake up!” I shake him this time, and still nothing; nothing at all. “Jack! Jack, seriously, the joke’s over now! Just open your eyes already! Jack! Wake up, goddamn it!”

“Nova!” Dad calls to me from the console. “What’s the matter?”

“He’s still not waking!” I groan as he comes back over. “He should be back to life by now! Why hasn’t he woken yet? He can’t be dead; not officially! He has to wake! He has to!” He just can’t die; not after all we’ve been through!

“Nova, it’s alright,” Dad says as he kneels down and wraps his arms around me, pulling me back against him. “I’m sure it’s just taking a bit longer for him to resurrect himself; it happens sometimes, even with Regeneration. Just wait a bit long—”

“No!” I snap. “I’m done waiting! He has to wake up now! He can’t die! Not because of me! Not again!” I pull away from my father and wrap my arms around Jack’s body, burying my face in his chest. “Jack, please, don’t do this! Don’t leave me! Please just wake up! Please!” I wait one final minute, but still no response.

Screw it, I groan as I sit up, this is taking way too damn long!

“He’s still not waking,” I growl out loud. “I’m gonna do it.” I raise one of my hands and will my Regeneration Energy to manifest. “This should work.”

“Nova, no!” Dad gasps, yet again, in disapproval. “You don’t need to waste your energy; not on him! Just wait another few seconds, and—”

“He’s not gonna wake up on his own!” I snap. “It’s been too long! I’m gonna use my energy to heal him, just like I did for you! It’s got to work! It will work!”

“Nova, stop! Just wait!”

I shake my head. “I can’t do that! Not anymore! He’s done so much for me, and I’ve hardly done anything for him! I owe him! I owe him my life! Please, Dad, just let me do this!”

He is silent for a few seconds before reluctantly agreeing. At this, I prepare to place my glowing hand over Jack’s chest to help restart his heart when he unexpectedly gasps back to life on his own and sits up on cue.

“Jack!” I gasp, startled, as Dad pulls me back away from him. “You’re alright!”

“Yeah, kid, I’m fine,” he chuckles as he takes deep breaths to pump more air through his system. “Told ya I’d see ya again, didn’t I?” He then frowns and asks, “Why’s your hand glowing?”

I instantly pull my hand away, feeling my cheeks blush with embarrassment. “Oh, uh… I just…thought you weren’t gonna come back, so I was gonna…”

“I get it,” he smiles at me in understanding. “Thanks anyway.”

I am completely unable to control my body as I automatically throw myself at him and wrap my arms around him tightly, refusing to let go for fear of him spontaneously dropping dead again. “I thought I’d lost you for good this time.”

Jack shakes his head, hugging me back. “Nah, it’s okay, kid. You’d never lose me. I came back, like I always do. I’d never leave you. Good to see ya again, Doc.”

“Likewise, Captain,” Dad nods back. “You scared us a bit there, mate.”

“Sorry about that,” Jack grunts as I help him to his feet, still keeping his arm around my shoulder. “Guess it took me a bit longer to regenerate, huh?”

“Well, you’re back now. Both of you,” Dad says as he pats Jack appreciatively on the back. “Thank you for bringing Nova back.”

“It wasn’t easy,” Jack shrugs before wincing from his injured shoulder where the tracker was imbedded. “Took me a long time just to find her, but I managed. You won’t believe what all we had to go through.”

“Madame Kovarian is back!” I speak up. “She showed up at the prison looking for me, and not just me. Since we last saw her, she’s been going to each prison, recruiting new people to gain back the numbers she lost. No surprise she’d do that. I tried stopping her, but she was another damn Avatar. God knows when she’ll ever show her true face.”

“You saw Kovarian again?” Dad frowns. “How did you escape her?”

“Jack saved me. She tried taking me away again, and he stopped her. That’s how we found out she was another Flesh Avatar. We escaped not long after.”

Dad nods. “Well, thank the stars you’re safe now.”

“I also found out something from Kovarian,” I say. “The person who framed me—it’s someone she hired. A ‘Zygon,’ whatever that is. Some kind of alien shape-shifter?” I briefly remember when Dad found me in the TARDIS library and I was startled to see him, he jokingly asked if I was expecting him to be a Zygon, to which I replied with a vague ‘no’ and moved on.

“Yes,” Dad confirms. “They can turn into literally anyone in the universe, even us.”

“But how?” I frown, confused as to how someone or something would morph into my form when we’ve never met. “I’ve never met any ‘Zygons’ before. I mean, I’ve run into fake versions of myself before, but none that smell like rotting fish.” I snort on that last part, thinking how utterly ridiculous it sounds and how comical it was to hear Kovarian say it with utter disgust.

Dad’s eyes suddenly perk up, like he’s seemingly had an epiphany. “Perhaps you have,” he says before correcting himself, “rather, you will,” before rushing back to the TARDIS console and setting a new new course.

“I ‘will’?” I ask, legitimately puzzled as Jack and I rush up to join him. “Are you saying I’ve haven’t met one yet, but I will in the future?”

“In other words, you’re gonna travel to the time of the King’s murder and catch the Zygon in the act before it murders him?” Jack says, seemingly admitting Dad’s plan before Dad even confirms it.

“Exactly!” Dad exclaims before thinking better. “Well, not exactly. Close, but not quite. Sadly, we can’t save the King from being murdered, as that is now a fixed point in Time.”

“Of course,” I sigh, rolling my eyes. “Makes sense.” Obviously the King’s murder was what led to my imprisonment, so, of course, we can’t unwrite that from the timeline. Ugh, if only we could…

“What we can do, at least,” Dad continues, “is, as Jack said, catch the Zygon in the act and stop him from causing further harm to anyone else.”

“How’re we gonna stop him?” Jack asks curiously.

“I don’t know yet, but I’ll have it worked out once we get there,” Dad admits with a shrug. “You two should change into something else that’s not prison rags.”

“And have a nice, hot shower,” I add, feeling in desperate need of one for what feels like weeks.

“Well, you may not have time for that,” Dad chuckles, “but you should at least have time to change into something cleaner.”

I sigh. “Fine, that works too. Be back in ten.”

Once Jack and I return to the Control Room after changing out of our prison rags (sadly without time for a shower), the three of us strategize how to take care of the Zygon. I even learn more about the Zygon species in the process—that they are nasty coral-like aliens out of water (as shown in a picture that was brought up on the TARDIS screen) that, like Dad said, can shape-shift into literally anyone in the universe, even Time Lords; and when they take people’s forms, they also acquire the person’s full memories up to that point in the person’s life, making it nearly impossible to discern which person is real and which is the Zygon. After that brief lecture, we plan how to take the one that framed me down. Sadly, we can’t save the King of Margonia from getting murdered by the Zygon, as that event is now considered as a fixed point in Time (as is my incarceration at the Judoon Prison, much to my frustration), so we plan how to stop the Zygon after the fact. We plan to somehow corner the Zygon somewhere and try to arrest it and turn it in to the Shadow Proclamation in my place, therefore clearing my name of the murder.

Once we finish strategizing, we go to the exact time and place of the King’s murder—to which Dad had the TARDIS somehow hack into the Shadow Proclamation’s systems to collect the info from the footage I was shown by the Shadow Architect—and we go to the coordinates and park in a nearby alley and watch around the corner as we see Fake-Me, dressed in that ugly military uniform from the Silence base, walk around the King’s bloody body, wielding what looks like some kind of knife. We hear the other ‘me’ mutter to the King in a taunting way as he slowly dies before ‘she’ turns up to the camera attached to the side of the building and waves, just like in the footage, and then casually walks off grinning ear to ear.

No way am I letting ‘her’ get away with this, nor Madame Kovarian, as she had orchestrated this whole thing just to get me out of the way of her plans and prevent me from escaping her. Never again!

“I’m gonna kill that bitch!” I mutter angrily before running after Other-Me, prepared to take ‘her’ down with my bare hands, mainly after what ‘she’ and the Silence put me through in the Judoon Prison.

“Nova, wait!” Dad calls out to me as I run. “We need to stick to the pl—”

But his voice, as well as Jack’s, falls on deaf ears as I chase after Other-Me, who at this point has begun running away upon hearing me approach. I chase ‘her’ through several alleyways until we reach a dead-end. Here we go again.

“Where’re you gonna go now, ‘Nova’?” I call out to ‘her’ as I watch ‘her’ frantically look around for a way out. “You trapped yourself at a dead-end! Again! You never learn, do you?”

Zygon-Me turns to me and grins in a seeming ‘joke’s on you’ manner as ‘she’ says, “There’s always a way out. So long, sucker!” before ‘she’ suddenly disappears in a flash of light.

I chuckle to myself (literally) as I hastily take out my sonic screwdriver. “Joke’s on you, sister. I was prepared for this.” Dad warned Jack and me that the Zygon might use some form of Time-Travel to escape back to Kovarian, and he taught me what to do in this scenario. I hold my sonic up and press the button, thinking it to bring Zygon-Me back, which it thankfully does as ‘she’ pops back into existence in the same light.

“What?” Zygon-Me looks around in confusion before ‘she’ notices me and growls before teleporting off again.

I simply use my sonic again to bring ‘her’ back, and ‘she’ reappears again, this time giving up. “Having trouble with your teleport?” I snigger at her. “Sucks for you, huh? Guess you’re screwed.” I enunciate the word ‘screwed’ as I hold up my screwdriver. “Yes, that was a pun, in case you didn’t catch it. Actually, both of those were puns. I never know when to stop making up puns; they just come to me. I can’t help it.”

“You think you can stop me from sending you to prison?” ‘she’ growls again. “You think you can try to rewrite that out of your past? You’re already too late! The cameras caught everything! Your past is fixed; there’s no changing it! Time-Travel 101!”

Clearly she copied my knowledge of Time-Travel as well as everything else. “Believe me, I know! But I’m not here to change the past!”

“Really?” Zygon-Me chuckles in doubt. “Then what are you here to do? Arrest me in your place to clear your name?”

In that moment, we hear Jack and my father’s yells coming from somewhere in the alley, coming closer to our location. “Nova! Nova, where are you?”

Zygon-Me chuckles again, this time with devious intentions. “Good luck with that! You losers are gonna get a kick out of this!”

I frown at ‘her,’ unsure of what ‘she’ is talking about, when ‘she’ suddenly shape-shifts again, but only ‘her’ clothes change to match mine exactly. ‘She’ finishes her partial transformation once Dad and Jack finally catch up to us, but it’s already too late.

“Nova, there you are!” Dad sighs as he rounds the corner with Jack. “Don’t run off like that agai—” He abruptly pauses mid-sentence when he sees not one but two of me standing in front of him. Jack gasps in shock before taking out his revolver and pointing it at us as Dad does the same with his own sonic screwdriver.

“Jack! Dad!” Zygon-Me sighs, clearly pretending to be me to confuse them. “Thank God you’re here! I finally caught the Zygon! Get her!”

“No, I’m not!” I protest. “She’s the Zygon! Get her!”

“Don’t listen to her!” Fake-Me insists. “She’s the murderer, not me! She’s just trying to trick you; that’s what they do, ri—”

“Stop!” Jack speaks up. “One of you is the real Nova. The question is, which one is it? Doctor?”

I watch as Dad uses his sonic screwdriver to scan both of us. I glance sideways toward Zygon-Me to see ‘her’ reaction, but there’s no fear from ‘her.’ In fact, ‘she’ smiles like ‘she’ already knows the outcome of the scan—that ‘she’ won’t register as a true Zygon at all. I turn back to Dad and briefly catch his eyebrows raise slightly like he had just discovered the truth, but he quickly lowers them back down again.

Dad sighs seemingly apologetically as he lowers his screwdriver to his side. “Scan says both Novas are real,” he announces. “They’re both registered as ‘Time Lord.’” At the corner of my eye, I see Zygon-Me give a subtle smile at this, but it’s so quick that if one blinked, they would miss it entirely.

But Jack doesn’t believe him. “No…” he shakes his head. “That’s not right! They can’t both be Time Lords. Only one is a true Time Lord; only one’s the real Nova.”

Dad shrugs. “I want to agree, Jack, but the sonic doesn’t lie. Both girls are confirmed to be Time Lords—excuse me, Ladies. Both are registered as ‘Nova Susan Song.’”

Jack continues to shake his head. “No! I refuse to believe that. One of you is a Time Lord. The other is a big, nasty slime-ball out of water. I can smell the stench off of you…well, one of you.”

Now that he mentions it, I can smell it too. I wrinkle my nose in disgust, but so does the Zygon before ‘she’ sighs in an annoyed tone, “I told you, you should’ve let me shower before we came here!”

“Do Zygons even shower?” I snort. “Even if they did, I seriously doubt that ‘rotten fish’ smell would ever come out. It’s definitely gonna be stuck in my nostrils for the rest of eternity. Thanks for that.”

“Shut up!” Jack snaps at us. “One of you is the real Nova, and the other is a Zygon! We just gotta figure out which one it is!” He then points his gun at Zygon-Me and growls, “I’m betting you’re the Zygon!”

Yes she is, I nod in my head. Shoot her!

“Jack! Seriously?” ‘she’ protests in an incredulous tone. “You honestly think I’m the ‘big, nasty slime-ball’ you say I am? I’m not! Jack, you know me! You saved my life! Your ex tried to kill me in the cafeteria, and you tried to intervene, only you ended up with a snapped neck. Since I thought you were dead, in my anger, I let the punks have it by blasting them across the room; I practically destroyed the entire cafeteria, even though I didn’t mean to. I did that for you; to avenge you! I couldn’t just let them kill you for no reason, especially since you’ve literally been the only one there who was remotely nice to me! I had to repay that kindness somehow, and that was how I chose to do it! You’re my friend, Jack, and I’d never let anyone hurt my friends!”

Wow! I’m genuinely surprised at how much the Zygon knows about me, especially my time in prison with Jack. I mean, I remember Dad explaining how Zygons can copy all memories, feelings and personalities exactly from the people they impersonate, but I’m still surprised that Zygon-Me admitted my deep feelings for Jack out loud in front of him as well as Dad. At this, I can’t help but blush in slight embarrassment, knowing they’ll never let me live it down after this.

“I saved one of your lives,” Jack corrects ‘her.’ “I wouldn’t sacrifice my life just for anyone. It would have to be for someone special…” He pauses before admitting, “Someone like Nova. The real Nova, I mean.”

“Yeah, and that’s me!” Zygon-Me insists. “I’m the real Nova! How else do I have to prove that I’m me?”

Ugh, I am so done with this!

“Oh my god, you’re so thick, aren’t you?” I sigh, rolling my eyes. “It’s so obvious who the Zygon is!”

Jack and Dad glance uncertainly at each other before Jack shrugs, “Who?”

I glance at Dad and wink at him before giving my spiel. “The one who talks the most!” I confirm. “And not just that! It’s the way you’re talking! First off, you automatically pointed the finger at me once they showed up, which is exactly what the imposter would do in an attempt to throw everybody else off. Secondly, your posture. In the whole time we’ve been standing here, you’ve been constantly shaking on the spot, and as a Time Lord, I can sense that your hearts-rate—excuse me, ‘hearts-rate’—” I say the word-combo in air-quotes, “—is extremely elevated in fear of getting caught. Thirdly, as the imposter, of course you would use the knowledge of the person you’re accusing against them by claiming them as your own… Though, I will admit, what you said about me avenging Jack after he was ‘killed’ in the cafeteria, you’re not wrong about any of that.” At this, I feel my cheeks flush even more with embarrassment. “And lastly, the second everyone has sussed out the imposter, of course the imposter would continually deny ever being a part of the crime, as you’re doing very poorly right now.” I then ask, turning to Jack and Dad, “Anything y’all wish to add? I mean, you’re the ones who get to choose who the imposter is and who’s the real Nova. Me, I’m just monologuing.” I then turn to my doppelgänger and raise my eyebrows at ‘her.’ “What about you, ‘Nova’? What’re your thoughts?”

At this point, ‘she’ seems to finally start to feel nervous, but ‘she’ chuckles and shakes ‘her’ head in one final attempt to confuse us, like none of us already know the truth, “This is ridiculous! Obviously the ‘imposter’ would say all those things about herself, again to throw everyone else off. Very clever…but not clever enough.”

“We’ll be the judge of that,” Jack snaps as he lifts his gun toward us once more. “What do you say, Doc? You think she’s the ‘imposter’…” he says as he points his gun at Zygon-Me. “Or is she the ‘imposter’?” he says as he points his gun at the real me.

Dad smirks, mostly at me. “Nah. I know who the real Nova is. I’ve known since the very beginning, the moment I scanned them.”

“But you said both of them were Time Lords,” Jack frowns at him. “Both of them registered as ‘Nova Susan Song’. You said the sonic doesn’t lie.”

Dad nods and admits, “And that’s true—the sonic doesn’t lie,” before he says, his smirk widening, “However…I lied.”

Of course, I snort. Typical Dad.

“What?” Jack deepens his frown, extremely confused. In fact, I notice Zygon-Me frowning in confusion as well, no longer feigning innocence.

Ooh, someone is royally screwed now.

“The data that the sonic receives when it scans something—” Dad explains, “or in this case, someone—always confirms its identity as it is; as I said, it never lies. However, I chose to lie about what it really told me.”

At this point, I begin to see sweat start to bead Zygon-Me’s face, which makes my own smirk widen. Yup, you’re definitely done for.

“As I said,” Dad continues, “when I scanned you two with the sonic, it confirmed your true identities; it confirmed that both of you are the same person; both of you are Nova. However, my psychic link says otherwise; in which case, both of you are, in fact, not Nova. Only one of you is the real Nova. There can only be one Nova. Right now I only have a psychic connection with one of the 'Novas', so yes, I’ve known who the real Nova was all along.”

"So, really, you didn't even need to use the sonic to point out the fake? All you had to do was use your psychic link to connect with the real Nova, and that was how you could sus out the 'imposter', knowing that a true psychic link wouldn't exist between you and the 'imposter' because it would only work between true Time Lords—in this case, you and the real Nova?" Jack snorts, and after Dad nods in confirmation, Jack’s smirk widens. “Wow, you never cease to impress me, Doctor.”

“It’s a hobby,” Dad shrugs in response.

“So who is it then?” Jack asks, glancing between me and Wannabe-Me. “The ‘imposter,’ I mean?”

At this, Dad turns to me and spreads his arms out towards me in a beckoning manner. “Dad!” I exclaim as I automatically run into his arms.

“Nova…” he whispers into my curly frizz-ball as he embraces me tightly. “I’ve got you… you’re safe now…”

At this, Zygon-Me sighs in defeat, rolling ‘her’ eyes. “I should’ve known you’d use that ‘fancy sonic gizmo’ of yours, Doctor!” ‘she’ says, quoting Jack’s words from my former memories, before ‘she’ transforms once more, this time into ‘her’ (its) true form—a slimy coral-like creature covered in suckers, like a humanoid squid. “I may have dispatched King Astorvox under Madame Kovarian’s orders,” the creature continues, this time in a raspy male voice, “but you were always my true target, Doctor! You and your daughter!”

In that moment, the Zygon attacks by spewing some kind of red liquid at us from its mouth. Before the liquid has a chance to splash me in the face, I turn away just in time to feel it splash on the back of my jacket instead.

“Jack, now! The Crystal!” I hear Dad scream as the creature begins rushing at us like a football-tackler.

However, before the Zygon can tackle us, there is a bright flash of light, and the creature growls before falling silent, and then the sound of metal clattering to the ground follows thereafter.

Breathless, I turn back round to see the Zygon gone, and, in its place, a knife can be seen lying harmlessly on the ground where it stood. “What the hell was that?” I exclaim in shock. “Where did he go?”

“Into here,” Jack says, lifting up what looks like a small shard of Kryptonite. “Inter-Dimensional Prison Cell.”

“It encages people in a small pocket-sized prison cell,” Dad confirms. “The Zygon will be stuck in there ‘til we decide to let it out.”

“Humph,” Jack snorts, “that decision won’t be up to me!”

“Me neither,” Dad agrees. “Leave it up to the Shadow Proclamation to decide.”

“May I see it?” I ask, curious as to what the strange green crystal actually is and how it works. After Jack gently hands it over, I squint and snigger at the tiny Zygon seemingly trapped inside the crystal, which appears to be screaming, hissing, and cursing at me (thankfully, the screams are muted on our end) as it swipes and claws at nothing. “Ha!” I snigger at it as I watch it flail around helplessly. “That’s what you get, fish-face! So long, sucker!” I say that last bit as I quote the creature from earlier, when it thought it could escape by teleporting away before.

As I am about to toss the crystal back to Jack, I instantly feel a scorching pain from my back, and I scream from the intense burning sensation.

“Nova!” Dad exclaims at the same time as Jack chastises me for almost dropping the crystal and risking releasing the Zygon from its portable prison cell. “What’s wrong?”

“My back!” I wince, the sensation growing stronger. “It stings!”

Dad holds me by the shoulder to look at the back of my denim jacket and gasps after a second. “It’s your jacket! Nova, take off your jacket, quick! Your shirt too!”

My jacket? I frown in confusion. Why would my jacket cause—

I pause. Oh… The strange saliva the Zygon spat at us… Was it some kind of acidic poison?

“My shirt too?” I ask as he helps me take off my jacket. “I can’t!” If I take off my shirt as well, I’d be flashing my boobs to them, and there is absolutely no way in hell I am doing that.

“It’s okay, Nova,” Dad assures me as he shrugs off his own jacket. “You can wear my jacket. Here.” He drapes his tweed jacket over my shoulders once my shirt is off (including my bra, since the stuff had burnt through that as well), and I wrap it tightly around me like a warm blanket.

“What was that?” I ask as I look down on my old jacket, shirt and bra sizzling on the ground as Dad wraps his arms around me to give me some extra warmth and protection.

“Venom,” Dad explains, “from a venom sac in the Zygon’s tongue. The venom could stun, maim, or even kill those it touches. Some of it must’ve gotten on your jacket. It burned right through it to your skin. It formed a nasty rash on your back. Don’t worry, you’ll be fine. You should be able to heal it quite easily once we get back to the TARDIS.”

“I wish I could do it right now,” I say, wincing in pain and wriggling on the spot like how a dog would when it has an itchy spot it can’t reach. “It itches like crazy.”

“Not here,” Dad shakes his head. “Don’t touch it. Wait ‘til we get back to the TARDIS. You’ll be safer to do it there.”

“We should go,” Jack speaks up as we begin hearing what sounds like otherworldly police sirens in the distance. “Sounds like the police are on their way.”

“Yes, we should go,” Dad agrees. “Come on, Nova.”

“Damn, I loved that jacket,” I sigh sadly as we walk past my sizzling clothes. “That was my favorite jacket.” And also a jacket that I’ve worn since I was thirteen, when my guardians got it for me for my birthday, though I choose not to mention this out loud. I’d never taken it off since…until now.

“Don’t worry,” Dad assures me once again, “we’ll get you a new jacket as soon as we can. Come along.”

The three of us head back to the TARDIS in silence. The second we return, I immediately rush off to my room and take a much-needed long shower as well as use a bit of my energy to heal the rash on my back from the Zygon’s poison. After my shower, I check my cellphone that I had purposefully left in my room for fear of losing it on my travels, and I see an unread message from Hazel asking when I’m coming home to enroll for the upcoming semester “which starts in a few weeks.” I reply by saying that I’m not sure, but I will let Dad know and get back to her when I do know when. I head back to the Control Room shortly thereafter.

However, once I get there, I hear the back end of a serious conversation between my father and Jack, and my hearts fill with extreme dread once I realize what they’re talking about: what went down in the prison cafeteria.

Of course, this was something I didn’t want my father finding out about, not just because he’s against me using violence (and violence in general), but because I had hoped to avoid a long conversation with him about my recklessness when he’s not around, which, apparently, is a habit I still haven’t gotten out of, even when I promised myself I would as I regenerated on that cliffside.

“Not gonna lie, it was quite shocking to say the least,” Jack comments in a grave tone.

“Don’t worry,” Dad says, sounding as equally concerned as Jack. “I’ll talk to her about it later. Thanks for being honest with me, Jack. You’re a good mate.”

“If only you weren’t already taken, I could be,” Jack chuckles.

“Good luck with that,” Dad chuckles back. “River’s not gonna give me up anytime soon.”

Jack shrugs. “Well, she’s one lucky woman to have you as a husband and Nova as a daughter. Speak of the devil…” He says that last bit in a joking manner as he hears me descend the stairs to them.

“Hey, guys,” I smile at them, acting like everything is normal, as I hand Dad back his jacket. “Here’s your jacket back. I feel much better now. That was probably the best shower I’ve ever taken.” I then say as Dad slips his jacket back on, “By the way, Hazel texted me about college starting up in a few weeks, so it’s probably time for me to go back home.”

“Oh. Uh, okay. No worries,” he says, sounding a bit disappointed. “Have you started packing?”

“Not yet, but I don’t have much to pack,” I shrug. “I wanted to let you know first.”

Dad nods. “Okay, better get packing then. I’ll send you home when you’re ready. I’ll just need the exact time and place to take you.”

“I’ll have to check again, but I’ll let you know,” I say as I begin turning away when Jack stops me, grabbing me by the arm.

“Hey, kid,” he speaks up. “I’m about to be headin’ out myself shortly.”

“Oh, you are?” I say, sad that our time together has been spent.

“Yeah,” Jack sighs, also feeling sad to leave us. “I’ve done my part. I’ve delivered you back to your old man, so now it’s time for me to go.”

“Go where?” I ask curiously. Why can’t you stay? I think about asking but don’t, my cheeks flooding with embarrassment again.

“Wherever I’m needed, I guess,” Jack shrugs before smirking and adding, “Or where there’s trouble.” Dad snorts at this last bit.

I sigh again before going up to Jack and wrapping my arms around him. “Well…good luck…wherever you go,” I whimper, hugging him tightly. “I’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss ya too, kid,” he hugs me back. “I’m sure we’ll see each other again soon.” He then whispers in my ear in a volume that my father can’t hear, his voice muffled by my thick curls, “You be careful. Sometimes, with a power like yours, it can be dangerous. I would recommend looking for ways to better control it.”

“I told you, I don’t know how,” I whisper back.

“Then ask your dad,” Jack recommends. “That’s what he’s here for. Yes, I told him more about what happened in the cafeteria. I also told him about that incident with that ‘Kovarian’ woman.”

I pause. So that’s what they were really talking about…

“How coul—” I start to say, but Jack cuts me off.

“He has a right to know, Nova. He’s your father; he worries about you…and so do I. That’s why I had to tell him. You don’t seem to understand how truly powerful you are. If you don’t learn to control your powers, bad things will happen; really bad things. Don’t think of what I’m telling you as a threat; I am trying to warn you, because as I said, I care about you and I worry about you. What might happen if you don’t learn to control your Deviancy… I just don’t want you to end up doing something you’ll regret.”

Jack’s words immediately make me think of the Shopkeeper’s words about me having to “make a sacrifice” that will make me “lose everything in the end,” as well as his final words: What you will lose… I hope it’s worth it. Of course, I still fear what would happen once the time comes, as well as ashamed that Jack had witnessed my so-called ‘outburst’ in the cafeteria, and I worry that something similar to the ‘cafeteria’ incident will happen when I have to make the ‘sacrifice,’ whatever that might be, which I am, of course, not too thrilled to find out.

“It’s okay, Nova,” Jack speaks up again, hugging me tighter in seeming forgiveness. “I trust you’ll figure it out.” He then releases me and goes to hug my father. “See ya round, Doc. I wonder who you’ll look like the next time I see ya.”

“I…wouldn’t know,” Dad says, taken a bit back by his old friend’s words. He also seemed to say it like he’s uncomfortable to admit that he’s used up all of his Regenerations since his last meeting with Jack and so won’t ever get a new one, which gives me the vibe that in previous times Jack’s met my father, he’s worn a different face every time…at least until now moving forward. “See ya too, Captain,” he says, shaking his hand as a way of dodging the topic. “Thanks for looking after my daughter.”

“No problem,” Jack smiles. “I’d be happy to do it again in a heartbeat. Just call.”

“Will do,” Dad nods before the two men salute each other. “Good luck.”

“See ya, kid,” the Captain says to me as he sets his Vortex Manipulator. “Take care of your old man for me.”

“You take care of yourself,” I reply. “That is an order, Captain.”

“Yes, Ma’am,” he chuckles back. “Good luck, kid. I hope you figure it out.” With that, he zaps away into Space-Time, leaving me to wonder when I’ll ever see him again…

If ever…

Before Dad has a chance to stop me to talk about our time in prison, I say as I swiftly run back up the stairs to my room, “Well, I should get packing.”

No surprise, Dad stops me anyway. “Not so fast, young lady. We need to have a talk. A long one.”

I groan as he gestures for me to come back down and sit on the steps with him. He sits down next to me as he begins his ‘talk.’ “Jack told me a couple of really disturbing things you did while you were in prison. He told me about your so-called ‘outburst’ in the prison cafeteria and how much damage you caused. He also told me about you and Madame Kovarian—how you wanted her to find you so that you could attempt to kill her in cold blood. Now, I don’t know what made you think that was a good idea, but it sure as hell wasn’t. We talked about this before! You’ve got to stop this, Nova!”

“I’m sorry, but I had to!” I groan again with a shrug. “I was afraid she’d turn Jack into one of them; that’s why I did it! I did it to save him!” I then say, lowering my voice to a deep growl, “Not that it really mattered anyway, since she was another damn avatar!”

“It does matter!” Dad insists, his anger rising. “You have to stop with these reckless decisions! If you keep doing this, you’ll end up regretting everything you do! Trust me, I know!”

“I know too!” I snap back. “Believe me, I know I messed up! I know there was absolutely no reason to have done what I did, especially when she turned out to be another Flesh Avatar! As I said, I thought I was doing the right thing! I thought I was saving Jack! More than that, I thought I was saving you, and especially Mom! I thought that by killing Kovarian once and for all, we’d all be safe from them forever! I thought I’d be saving everyone from them—the entire universe! I wasn’t going to let them turn anybody else into mindless killers!” My own anger increases the more I speak, and by the end of my rant, my vision has taken on that familiar heated, golden tinge, which builds up intense pressure in my head. I wince and groan, rubbing my eyes and head in pain.

“Whoa, take it easy, Nova,” Dad says, rubbing my back gently. “You need to calm down, take deep breaths. I think I finally understand what’s causing your ‘outbursts.’ It’s stirred up by anger. Every time you think about the Silence, or really anything that seriously angers you, it stirs up your anger and causes your energy to overload and burst out like a bomb. Like a supernova. You need to learn to control your emotions—control your fear, and especially your anger. Learn to control the storm inside you.”

The ‘storm’ inside me… ‘The Oncoming Storm’…

Not only that, but his words also make me think of my ‘fear’-self’s words from Victorian London, after she had attempted to kill me only to blast a building apart instead: ‘Didn’t know I could do that, did ya? Oh, what am I saying; of course you did! You’ve done it several times already, out of extreme anger or fear! I’ll tell you a secret; that right there—that wasn’t from fear or anger. Wanna know what emotion I used? It was hatred. Hatred is the strongest emotion, even stronger than fear or anger; the Vokanari taught me that. My—excuse me, our—hatred for our own father made me more powerful than I could ever imagine! It shaped me into who I am now—who you were meant to be since the beginning!’

I remember feeling extreme hatred toward Kovarian at the prison and used it to kill her…or at least tried to, if she weren’t a damn Flesh Avatar. I remember hating Jack’s ex-boyfriend (or spouse?) Marco for pointlessly killing Jack in the cafeteria, which stirred up my energy to blast back at him and almost end his life too. I even remember when my evil self became corrupted with anger and hatred toward her (our) bio-parents in my ‘coma’ world, even though Kovarian trained her that way, just like my mother. In fact, I remember both of my evil selves hinting that I would become just like them one day, but I had never believed them…

Until now.

I am suddenly overwhelmed with fear as I begin sobbing uncontrollably. “I was warned that this would happen. I was warned that I would become this—twice. I never thought… I can’t believe… I’m scared, Dad. I’m so scared.”

“Hush, Nova,” he says, wrapping his arms around me and holding me against his chest, against his hearts. “You’re not a bad person, nor are you becoming one. You’re a very good person who bad things have happened to, that’s all. You have a lot of anger in you that you’ve lived with your whole life because of these bad things. None of the bad things make you a bad person; you need to understand that. As I told your grandmother once upon a time, ‘every life is a pile of good things and bad things. The good things don’t always soften the bad things, but vice versa; the bad things don’t necessarily spoil the good things or make them unimportant.’ As I said, you’ve had a lot of bad things happen to you, but they don’t make you a bad person. You just have to think more about all the good things that have happened and less about the bad things; don’t let the bad things control your life. The more you think about those bad things—particularly all the things the Silence and Kovarian have done—the more anger you feel, which then leads to extreme hatred, and that’s what seems to stir up your energy. Focus more on the things that make you happy. If you can’t, talk to me. As Jack said, that’s what I’m here for. I’m here to support you and help you, like any good father would. I want to help you live a good and happy life. If you ever feel alone or angry, no matter where you are in Time and Space, you can always talk to me through our psychic link, and I will always listen. I will never make you feel alone ever again. I will always be here, in your thoughts, and in your dreams, and in both of your hearts. I will love you always, Nova Susan Song.”

His words make me feel ashamed and embarrassed of everything I’ve done in the last week. I bury my face in my father’s chest and attempt to cry the shamefulness and embarrassment away. Thankfully, Dad doesn’t say anything else and instead just holds me tight against him, refusing to let me go until I calm down or speak up about what’s bothering me in the moment. In all honestly, there’s nothing else that bothers me that I haven’t already told him in the whole time I’ve known him, so I just stay silent as well and let Dad’s embrace continue calming me, which does the trick as well as seemingly take a ginormous weight off my shoulders.

As we stay like this, I think about everything Dad has trained me over the last several months, and how much it all has overwhelmed me as well as wore me out both physically and mentally, particularly all of the other Time Lord abilities that I never knew I (or anyone, for that matter) was capable of doing: How I could delete memories from one’s mind, as well as alter them to some extent… How I can slow one of (or even both) my hearts down to the point where even a regular heart monitor would think I was legitimately dead… How I can project my mind into someone else’s across the entirety of Space-Time… (Okay, so this last one I’ve known for a while, but it still highly creeps me out to this day). And these are just to name a few. I imagine there’s still a load of abilities Dad hasn’t taught me yet; that, or there’s several Deviant abilities that even he never knew existed that I may possess without knowing it. Either way, I don’t think I can handle any more, especially for a while.

“I know I’ve thrown a ton at you over the last few months,” Dad continues, of course reading my thoughts, “and I’m truly sorry if it all overwhelmed you. As important as it is for you to understand what and where you come from, especially before I d—” He pauses before correcting himself, “Uh, before Trenzalore, I never realized how much I’ve been throwing at you at one time, and it’s become too much for you to handle, and for that I am truly sorry.”

“I understand that there’s a lot for me to know before all of that,” I speak up for the first time after several minutes, “which could happen at literally any time, but…yeah, it’s become too much, and I am in desperate need of a break. A long break. I didn’t want to ask about it because I was afraid you’d say ‘no’ and insist that we keep going, no matter how tired I was.”

Or worse, keep me from ever going back home to my ‘human’ life on Earth, I think but do not say, feeling more desperate than ever to return to that life, not just temporarily but rather for good.

“No, no, no, Nova,” he says as he pulls away and cups my cheeks to make me focus on him and only him. “Never be afraid to ask to have a break. I would totally have said ‘yes’ if I’d known how much you’ve been struggling.” He then sighs before admitting in a quiet voice as if he’s afraid someone else will hear, “The truth is… I’m afraid too. Afraid of what would happen at Trenzalore. Afraid of what would happen if…if I die—permanently. Afraid of what would happen to the universe after I’m gone. Afraid of what would happen to you without me there to help you. You would be terribly alone without me. The last of your kind. ‘The Last of the Time Lords,’ just like me before you were born. I’m afraid for you to suffer the way I did.”

“Nah,” I shake my head, “I wouldn’t be alone. I’ll have Hazel, and any other people I meet later in my life. Like all the people you meet on your travels. Seriously, Dad, you don’t have to worry about me. I’ll get by just fine, knowing you’ll be with me in spirit. Who knows, maybe your spirit will live on through Idris. She’ll take care of me. Won’t you, Old Girl?” I ask this last bit to Idris, our dearest friend and trusty transport.

‘I absolutely will, Nova,’ she replies in a cheerful voice. ‘You have absolutely nothing to fear, my thief. She is in safe hands.’

“Yeah, see?” I shrug, gesturing to the console, “I’m in good hands; you have absolutely nothing to worry about, as she says.”

He smiles up at his trusty ship, though his voice still sounds a bit unsure. “Thanks, Old Girl. I always know I can count on you to keep my family safe.” He then says, turning to me as we rise to our feet, “Off you go now. You have much to pack before I send you home.”

With that, I rush back upstairs to my bedroom and begin packing my suitcase that Dad had made bigger on the inside just like the TARDIS. I’ll admit, I am super lazy with the packing, as I simply throw everything in in a disorganized fashion (Shut up; everyone has done it!). At least I make sure I have the basics, including essential items such as my psychic paper, sonic screwdriver, and TARDIS key, which I have hooked on the chain with my locket that Dad had given me as a coming-of-age gift (Dang, had that really just been a year ago?). I remember filling the locket with small pics of my parents’ faces that I had printed, cut out, and taped inside. Once I finish packing, I look at my cellphone and see the exact date and time of Hazel’s previous text (August 3^rd, 2016) and make a mental note of it before I text back that I am finally on my way and should hopefully be back later that same day. I then return downstairs to the Control Room with my things, including my guitar case (Ain’t no way I am going anywhere without my music!).

“Oh, Nova,” Dad gasps once I return, “give me your sonic! I’ve made several software updates to mine and thought about doing the same to yours; in fact, I should probably do this from now moving forward.”

“Sure,” I shrug as I carelessly hand it over. After he plugs my sonic into the console to charge and update for the semester, Dad asks if I had found out the exact time and place to return me to, and I confirm and give them to him.

While he inputs the time-coordinates, I ask curiously, this topic mercilessly eating at me since I started packing, “Hey, while I was packing, I thought of something from earlier, while we were taking care of the Zygon.”

“Go on,” he smiles and turns to me.

“If you knew that entire time which one of us was the real me,” I confirm, “why didn’t you just say so right then and there? I mean, you could’ve saved us a lot of time if you had.” And I would’ve saved my clothes from getting sprayed by Zygon puke, I add but don’t say out loud.

“Because then it wouldn’t have been a proper test,” he shrugs like that should be obvious.

“Wait, what?” I frown. “That was a test? For what?”

“For how well you could prove your own innocence,” Dad confirms.

WHAT! THE! ACTUAL! HELL?!

“Seriously?!” I exclaim. “What was the point?”

What if I had failed?!

“One day when you’re off traveling on your own,” he explains, “you’re gonna have to know how to find your own ways to get out of stressful, and even deadly, situations. It will be highly important to know how to do in order to keep you and others alive. And I must say, you took the Zygon situation extremely well. It was very clever, the way you sussed it out. Well done.”

“Thanks,” I frown, still in utter disbelief. “I didn’t know whether that would work or not. Thank God it did, and I didn’t have to fall back on my other idea.”

Also, thank God I didn’t fail the test. I can’t help but think what would’ve happened if I had—whether I’d survive as myself or end up having to regenerate. As much as I hate to admit it, I don’t think Dad had totally thought through this test, even considering what would happen if I had, indeed, failed. How would he have felt if I had? Would he have even cared? Would the test have even been worth it, especially if I truly had to sacrifice a Regeneration? In all honesty, for a moment, I legitimately thought Jack was going to shoot one of us, and if he had shot me, thinking I was the Zygon, I can’t help but think that that Regeneration would’ve been a total waste, especially when it would’ve proved that Jack was wrong. How would Dad have felt in that moment? How would Jack have felt in that moment, especially after Dad had put him in that position?

How could Dad think to do something like that? To anyone? To me?

“What was your other idea?” Dad asks curiously, bringing me back to the present.

“I wanted to see if Zygons could regenerate while taking the form of a Time Lord,” I shrug. “Or, at the very least, conjure the energy. If it couldn’t, then ‘BUSTED!’” Again, did Dad plan this? Did he plan to have Jack shoot one of us, and if one of us began regenerating, then that one was the real ‘me’? Did he really plan to do that to me?

Please, God, tell me I’m wrong…

Dad chuckles like he’s unsure of the same thing; that, or he’s actually confirming my theory (Again, please tell me I’m wrong!), “Yes, that would’ve been a good idea as well…” He then pauses and says, “However, that idea may not be the cleverest idea. I keep telling you that every time you use your Regeneration Energy, many of our enemies could smell it across the cosmos and come running after it like a moth to a flame. You need to be careful about when it’s appropriate to use your energy, Nova. That’s why it’s so important that you learn ways to control your anger and keep your hatred at bay. Those emotions are what trigger your ‘supernova’ to detonate. You need to keep calm and keep your powers hidden so that doesn’t happen again.”

Oh, thank God, I sigh in genuine relief, and here I thought he was gonna have me killed for absolutely no reason. Thank God I’m wrong.

“Don’t worry, Dad. Hazel will help me,” I assure him. “She’s really good at keeping me calm and cheering me up. It’s one of the things that make her a good friend.”

“Very well,” Dad sighs, though he still sounds unconvinced, but decides to trust me anyway. “Just promise me you’ll call me every once in a while just to tell me how you’re doing, and especially if anything happens that you can’t handle.”

Ugh, seriously?! Again with the overprotectiveness?!

In any case, I nod, saying, “I will. I promise. Maybe I’ll call Mom too, just to catch up, and maybe even Amy and Rory.” It would be nice to hear their voices again, especially my grandparents’.

“Yes, you do that,” Dad nods himself. “I’m sure your mother and grandparents would like to know what you get up to too.” He then says after the TARDIS seems to settle, “Anyway, we’ve landed. August 3^rd, 2016, as requested. Are you sure you have everything?”

“Yes, Dad, I’m pretty sure I do,” I sigh, rolling my eyes as I gather my things.

“Good girl,” Dad nods in approval as he reaches out and hugs me. “Keep me in the loop often.”

“Only if you actually answer your phone for once,” I say as I walk to the exit. “I love you.”

“I love you too, my Nova,” Dad smiles as he watches me leave. “Stay safe.”

At this, I exit the TARDIS, feeling the joy of being human again…at least for a while. I just hope that ‘while’ lasts a long time, preferably a lifetime.

Chapter Text

I don’t even wait and watch the TARDIS disappear the instant I walk out the doors, like I normally do. Instead, I just walk out and continue walking, not looking back; not because I no longer have an interest in watching the TARDIS leave (even though I am, by now, quite used to this and therefore don’t necessarily need to watch the ship disappear every time, though I still quite enjoy the spectacle all the same) but rather because I’m so anxious to be back home. Back to my normal ‘human’ life…or at least as ‘normal’ as the life of a Time Lord living as a human should be. I’m anxious to find out what’s changed in the last eight months I’ve been away. In all honesty, I doubt much has changed apart from Hazel continuing through the school year without me. I’m sure in all that time, she’s been just as anxious for me to return home as I am. After all this time, the day has finally come.

As I walk up to our previously assigned dorm room, I think about surprising Hazel by just simply walking in unannounced and see how she reacts; I bet she’d pee her pants with excitement. I giggle at the image as I finally reach the room and pull out my ID card which also acts as my dorm room key, but when I scan it, it doesn’t let me in the room for some odd reason. I try a few more times, but it still doesn’t work. For a moment, I think about using my sonic screwdriver to hack the lock and enter that way, but I choose not to at the last second, wanting to try to avoid anything ‘Time Lordy’ for a while, which would include using my sonic screwdriver for any purposes, even if it’s for picking a simple lock. I glumly knock on the door instead, even though it kinda defeats the purpose of the surprise.

To my surprise, it’s not my best friend who answers but, rather, an unfamiliar boy.

“Um…hi,” I frown at the boy, puzzled as to who he is and what he’s doing in our room. “Is Hazel here?” Could he be a friend from one of her classes, like a study-partner? Or possibly a boyfriend?

“Who’s Hazel?” the boy asks in a Welsh accent, clearly unfamiliar with the name. Okay, definitely not a boyfriend, or even a ‘friend’ for that matter.

“Hazel McAdams,” I clarify. “She’s my friend. This is still her room, right? Rather our room; I’m her roommate. My keycard didn’t work for some reason, so that’s why I knocked. Are you her friend? Is she here?” I look past the boy and see another boy sitting in his bed with a laptop in his lap, appearing to be playing a video game (even through his headphones, I can hear what sounds like gunshots). Upon seeing me, the other boy stops playing momentarily and waves, and when he does, he smiles at me in a flirtatious way, instantly making me think of Jack Harkness. I smile a little uncomfortably, waving politely back.

“Nope,” the boy at the door shakes his head, glancing back at his apparent roommate. “Just me and Isaiah. Don’t know anyone named Hazel. Sorry.”

“Okay,” I nod, still feeling awkward, “no worries. She must’ve switched rooms and forgot to tell me. Sorry for the confusion. Bye.”

“Bye,” the Welsh boy replies as he slowly closes the door.

However, as he does, his roommate begins frantically yelling at him not to close the door, and there is a loud crash from the room as the roommate’s laptop falls to the floor as he screams about his friend “letting a cute American girl leave without the chance to ask her out.” I take that as my cue to rush away immediately, having no interest at all in being asked out by anyone, especially after hearing that, one day, I would be betrayed by someone who would fall in love with me (or vice versa).

Ugh, I growl to myself as I reach the dorm lobby, I am so stupid! Of course they would’ve assigned new dorm rooms for students every summer! I also feel stupid to not have texted Hazel about the dorm-change before Dad dropped me off. As I reach for my phone, I see that it’s blowing up with text messages, one immediately after the other, every single second, which I find strange, as I’ve only been gone eight months…at least, I’m pretty sure it’s only been that long. Ignoring the onslaught of messages, planning to read them later once my phone stops beeping (that is, if it doesn’t outright die from the overload), I decide to call Hazel directly.

I begin talking the instant Hazel answers the phone. “Hey, Haze, it’s me, Nova! I just got back to the dorm, hoping to surprise you, but apparently they ch—”

“WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?!?!?!” comes her immediate scream through the phone, nearly making me go deaf in the one ear I have my phone pressed to.

“Whoa!” I exclaim, wincing as I pull my phone away from my ear slightly. “Geez, Haze, did you really need to burst my eardrum?” I quickly take note of how angry she sounds, which seems odd as I haven’t been gone longer than I said I’d be… At least, I think I haven’t. Then again, Hazel has always been quite the Drama Queen, especially in recent years, so this isn’t really anything new to her.

“YOU’VE BEEN GONE FOREVER!!!!” she continues screaming through the phone.

However, I don’t pay much mind to it, thinking she’s just having another of her typical ‘Teenage Drama’ episodes. “Okay, I think you’re overreacting a li—”

“I WAITED FOR YOU! I THOUGHT YOU’D NEVER COME BACK!”

The more she speaks, the angrier she sounds, which is starting to be a bit concerning to me. Perhaps this isn’t her typical ‘Teenage Drama’…

“Okay, can we talk about this in person?” I suggest as calmly as I can muster, still legitimately confused as to the reasoning for my best friend’s apparent psychotic frenzy. “I only just got back, and I’m tired. What’s your new dorm room number?”

“I don’t live in the dorm anymore,” Hazel answers, this time a little calmer, though she still sounds quite vexed. “I live in an apartment now.”

Okay, so there’s one thing that’s changed between us. God knows what else has changed. From Hazel’s psychotic behavior through the phone, I’m afraid to find out. Perhaps I’ve been gone way longer than I thought…

“Okay, what’s the address?” I ask, and after she gives it, I reply, “Okay, I’ll be there in a bit,” before I hang up and input the address in my usual GPS app. I groan in aggravation when I discover that it has begun heavily raining outside, along with a loud clash of thunder.

“Great,” I grumble to myself as I walk my belongings out into the pouring rain. “First, I come home to find that the school had switched dorm rooms on us, since I was stupid enough not to contact Hazel about this; next I find Hazel in a psychotic frenzy for whatever reason, which is far from her usual drama, and now I have to walk for half a mile in a raging thunderstorm. What next; an invasion of flying monkeys? Tornadoes? Witches?” The last thing I want is for a sudden tornado to spawn and send me on an unplanned trip to OZ, now that I’ve just returned to my legitimate home. In all honesty, I wouldn’t be surprised if that actually happens.

I am completely soaked to the bone when I finally reach Hazel’s new home not far from the campus borders. A few seconds after knocking, Hazel finally answers, still looking considerably pissed off, and I’m shocked to see her hair is significantly longer since the last time I saw her in person; then again, it’s been eight months.

“Hey,” I smile a little uneasily at her, as she looks ready to slap me, or strangle me, or something that’s, apparently, the complete opposite of a warm hug, which disturbs me greatly, as she’s never ever greeted me like this before. I wait a few seconds for her to say something or step aside, but she just stands there staring with intense rage. “Uh…may I come in? The weather’s getting pretty bad out here,” I point out, now beginning to feel incredibly uncomfortable with her behavior as well as cold from the rain.

After another few seconds, she finally steps aside to let me into her apartment, but she doesn’t say a single word, and I can’t decide if that’s a sign that I should run or not. Her behavior is really starting to weird me out.

Nevertheless, I shrug it off and say as I set my bigger-on-the-inside suitcase and normal-sized guitar case aside and hang my soaked jacket (that’s sadly not my favorite flower-printed one that was singed during my previous adventure), “Man, it’s not fun when you’ve been gone eight months and come home to this kind of weather. It almost never fails. But then again, it’s Engl—”

“Twenty!” Hazel speaks up for the first time since our intense phone call.

“What?” I frown, puzzled as to what she’s talking about. Twenty what? Be more specific, sister; I’ve only been back a little under an hour, and I’m already having a rough day as it is!

“Twenty months!” Hazel specifies, her face turning red as her anger boils to the max. “You’ve been gone twenty months! You were supposed to come back this time last year!”

I deepen my frown. “What’re you talking about? It’s August Twenty-Sixteen, isn’t it?”

She shakes her head. “No, Nov! It’s August Twenty-Seventeen! You’ve been gone a year and a half, almost two years! You were supposed to come home a year ago! You promised you would!”

I shake my own head, in utter disbelief. “No! It can’t be Twenty-Seventeen! Dad said it was Twenty-Sixteen! He was sure he’d got the coordinates right!”

“Well, he didn’t, coz it’s Twenty-Seventeen. Check your phone.”

I immediately do what she says, and, shockingly enough, the date does, indeed, read “Aug 3^rd, 2017.” I also see my phone continue to flood with hundreds of text messages and missed calls, not surprisingly all from Hazel. I shut my eyes and groan, realizing that Dad had ended up fat-fingering a time-coordinate when he was inputting the year.

Aw, Dad, how could you do this? I trusted you to have gotten the coordinates right! You said you did, but you didn’t! I should never have trusted you!

“Still getting my texts, I see,” Hazel comments as she hears my phone ding away seemingly without end. “Now I understand why you’ve never responded to my messages this entire time you’ve been gone.” She says this in a tone like she thinks I’ve completely ignored them in the whole time I’ve been gone, which isn’t true at all.

“No, I have, I swear!” I say as I struggle to silence my phone. “Since Dad screwed up the time-coordinates, Time is catching up with me. An entire years’ worth of time, apparently. Shut up already!” I growl this last bit at my phone as it continues beeping with endless text messages and missed phone calls, so I simply shut the whole thing down.

“That was the last time I got a message from you,” Hazel points out. “Exactly a year ago today! You said you’d be back sometime later that same day! I waited for you, but you never showed! I tried calling you and texting you every day, but you never answered! I even waited outside, watching for that stupid blue box! I was so worried about you! I thought you had died, or had gone back to your parents’ home planet, or whatever! I thought I’d never see you again! I was scared I’d never see you again! How could you do that to me? For an entire year?! I thought you were my friend! I thought I was your friend! ‘Friends always stick together, for better or worse, even ‘til death do us part,’ remember?”

“Of course I remember!” I say, incredulous that she’d think I’d forgotten our oath. “I’d never forget something like that, and I certainly would never forget you! I didn’t know Dad got the coordinates wrong! How was I supposed to know, anyway?”

“You could’ve looked over his shoulder!” she shrugs.

I chuckle. “Time-Coordinates are written in Old High Gallifreyan! I can barely understand Traditional Gallifreyan! It’s not near as easy as learning Spanish or French, trust me! Even the spoken language is different than the written language—completely different!”

“Well, he should’ve paid more attention!” she shrugs again. “You shouldn’t have just blindly taken his word for it!”

“You’re right!” I sigh. “I’m sorry! As much as I want to fix this, I can’t! Whatever’s happened in the last year is set in stone; I can’t change anything about it! Trust me, I really wish I could, but I can’t! Doing so would put a hole in the Space/Time Continuum—don’t ask how; it’s really complicated to explain! I’m sorry! What more do you want from me?!”

“I WANT MY SISTER BACK!”

Hazel’s outburst makes me pause for a minute, suddenly realizing that when referring to her ‘sister,’ she means me. This realization brings a flood of tears to my eyes and makes me lose all powers of speech.

“I want things to go back to the way they were,” Hazel admits as she, too, begins sobbing uncontrollably. “Back before I knew Time-Travel existed. Back before I knew your secret to not being human. Back when things actually made sense. Back when things were normal between us. Ever since I was kidnapped, things have changed, and not for the better. For the last year, I’ve had constant nightmares about what I went through in that damn dungeon. I’ve had to go through months of therapy, and I still need it today. Every time I close my eyes, I see that witch with the eye-patch; and every time I open my eyes, I fear I’ll still see her staring down at me, taunting me about how you’d never come back, that you no longer cared and had left me for good. The guards did that every single day we were trapped in that dungeon, as did the witch. These nightmares have affected my grades a bit too. Last semester, I came really close to flunking out because my grades were so low. I’ve lost so many hours of sleep because of them—both the nightmares and the bad grades but mostly the nightmares.”

I’ve never noticed the heavy bags under her eyes until she mentioned them. I can also see the scars in her eyes left from the horrors she’d been through in that dungeon as she said. Mercilessly, this ups my guilt, making me think I should’ve kept my secret from her like my guardians asked. A small part of me regrets telling her my secret, knowing that her knowing the secret has gotten her in so much danger to the point where she has to go through therapy just about every day to keep her from losing her sanity. I mean, going through therapy is bad enough, but it’s nowhere near as bad as being used as bait to lure me to the Silence and almost dying of hunger, dehydration and disease in a dark dungeon in order to do so.

“I wish I could forget all that stuff,” Hazel finishes after a minute. “I wish I could forget everything.”

We remain silent for several minutes, with Hazel sobbing in her hands and me feeling extremely guilty for what she had to go through in my absence. I can imagine everything Hazel described about waiting an entire year for me to return, hoping I would, but by the end of the day I still don’t come back. I can imagine how hard that must’ve been to wait for so long, only for her hopes to be taken away again by the next morning, and for this to happen on a loop every single day that follows, which eventually bled into weeks; and when it started becoming months, Hazel began thinking that something terrible had happened to me and my family and I would never return because of what happened. Hazel seemed to admit that she actually considered a few times in the year that I had completely forgotten about her and so decided to never return and, instead, stuck with my new Time Lord life with my family (this, of course, not being true). I feel awful to have made Hazel believe that I had died or no longer had an interest in coming home because I no longer cared.

If Dad hadn’t screwed up the damn coordinates…

“I’m so sorry, Haze,” I finally speak up. “If I’d known what you were going through…”

In all honesty, there was really no way for me to have known. So much has happened in the last eight months, and, regrettably, I never had the time to stop to think about what Hazel was doing in my absence. I always figured she’d be simply living her normal human life without me with no worries at all, but I was wrong. I mean, I’ve texted her a few times when I do have the time between adventures, but I hadn’t gotten many replies from her. Usually, I wouldn’t get any replies from her until days or weeks later due to the so-called “Time-Differential”; in other words, depending on the time or time period, I could send a message to Hazel (or vice versa), but it wouldn’t receive until days, weeks, or months later.

I recall my father explaining more about how Time works in general—how it doesn’t run in a straight line, and how it runs in different speeds for different people; for example, depending on the time, a week for me could be a month for Hazel (or vice versa). Since Dad screwed up the time-coordinates and made me return home an entire year late, I missed a lot of time at home and am only now just getting caught up, hence the flood of text messages and missed calls to my phone; no doubt I’m still getting messages even when my phone is powered off.

I don’t turn my phone back on and check the messages, but I can imagine most of the messages saying things like “It’s been a’ X’ number of days/weeks/months. Where are you?”, “Are you ever going to come home?”, “I miss you”, etc., and the messages sound more and more desperate and hopeless as time goes on, until eventually the messages stop altogether. I can imagine she stopped sending messages a few months before I came back, but I can’t imagine what Hazel did or how she felt during that time. Perhaps, now that I’m back, things would gradually change for the better between us. I may have an opportunity to make amends with her and things would finally go back to normal between us.

“I really wish I’d known,” I continue with a heavy sigh. “This wouldn’t have happened if I’d paid better attention to Dad’s time-coordinates rather than just simply take his word for it. He’s not exactly the timeliest person around—pun intended. That, and he’s twelve-hundred years old, so his mentality isn’t all there sometimes…or so he claims.” I then pause, thinking better. “Then again, maybe I should never have told you my secret. You would’ve been a lot safer if you hadn’t known. You wouldn’t have felt the need to follow me to London to help me find my parents. More importantly, you wouldn’t have to have been targeted by the Silence. This was all my fault. My guardians warned me how dangerous it would’ve been if I’d told anyone else. I should never have told you. I’m so sorry, Haze.”

I honestly don’t know if taking Hazel to the hospital and having her arm amputated would’ve been better than using my Regeneration Energy to heal her arm, like I did that day after the arcade incident back in High School. Sure, if Hazel was taken to the hospital, she would’ve had to live with one arm for the rest of her life, but perhaps she would’ve been safer without the knowledge of my Regeneration Energy and everything else pertaining to my being Time Lord.

Or… Better yet… What if, exactly as she said, she completely forgot everything?

No! I shake my head in response to my own thought. No way! Absolutely not! No way am I doing that again, especially to Hazel! She would never forgive me!

But then again…if she doesn’t remember…it wouldn’t matter anyway…

I am completely unable to prevent the next words from tumbling out of my mouth. “If you want…I can delete your memory.”

“What?!” she immediately exclaims at my outrageous suggestion while taking a step back.

“You say you want to forget everything about my secret…” I explain. “I can make that happen. As a Time Lord, I have the ability to delete memories, even alter them to some extent. If you think it’ll make you feel better…I can delete your memories of everything you went through in that dungeon. You won’t remember a thing.”

My words instantly make me think of that time when Dad took me to learn Venusian Aikido, and during training, I had the privilege of meeting the Venusian Prince of the entire planet, who I found out was a big fan of Aikido and would often watch people train for his entertainment. He claimed he had watched me train for quite some time and came to introduce himself and asked me and my father to his Royal Ball where he would choose a bride of which to marry. Of course, I couldn’t say ‘no’ to the invite, so we went, and it was one of the most amazing dances I’ve ever been to—way better than those lame school dances like Prom and Homecoming. I got to dance most of the night with the prince, which probably made several other women jealous (not that I much cared). Because of this, it was clear who he seemed interested in picking as his princess. Yup, you guessed it! Of course, he chose me as his bride-to-be, which became a huge problem, as 1) I wasn’t Venusian, and 2) I had absolutely no prior experience or even the slightest interest in ruling an entire planet, no matter how cool it sounded in the moment. Of course, he was a bit pushy about it, and as much as I wanted to say ‘yes’ to his proposal, as I admittedly had strong feelings for the prince as well, I had to say ‘no’ and sadly wipe his memory of him ever meeting me, and I regretted it so much that I hoped I wouldn’t ever have to do it again after that, and I don’t think I would ever forgive myself if I had to do this to Hazel.

“No!” Hazel frowns, bringing me back to the present. “I don’t want you to delete my memories! I don’t want to forget you!”

“You won’t forget me…per se. You’ll just forget everything I told you about my secret. You’ll still remember me, but you’ll remember me as a human and not as a Time Lord. You’ll remember me as ‘Sydney Marie Elise’ and not as ‘Nova Susan Song.’” For some reason, after this was said, it sounds like a lie, and it very well could be, for all I know.

She shakes her head again. “No! I really don’t want to forget any of that stuff!”

“Are you sure?” I frown. “These memories are what’s been giving you your nightmares.”

“I’m sure,” she nods. “I don’t want to forget anything.” She then smiles and says, “Now that you’re back, I don’t have to worry anymore, knowing you’ll protect me.”

As she, to my complete and utter astonishment, runs over to hug me, I feel a massive wave of guilt hit me, thinking I won’t be around very long to fulfill her wish, knowing I’ll only be back for the semester. For all I know, after the semester is over, I might be gone much longer than planned (even longer than this past year) and end up never returning at all. I can’t imagine what Hazel would do if that ended up happening, and I hope to God that it doesn’t happen. Only Time will tell at this point.

“I’m so happy you’re back, Nova,” she says, saying my full name rather than my chosen nickname, as she hugs me tightly. “I’ve really missed you.”

“I’ve missed you too,” I hug her back. “I really mean it.” I say this last bit, thinking that she doesn’t believe me since I’ve been gone so long.

“I believe you,” she assures me. “You wouldn’t have come back if you didn’t. You’re really cold. I’ll go get you a towel.”

Funnily enough, I never truly felt the cold until Hazel pointed it out just now. “Thanks,” I say, shivering on the spot from my soaked clothes and hair as she runs off to fetch me a towel from the laundry room. I thank her again as she offers for me to make myself at home by settling on the sofa and wrapping myself in a blanket to warm my shivering body after I’ve dried off.

“Since you’ve been gone so long,” Hazel says as she joins me in the Living Room and hands me a hot mug of tea, “you have to tell me everything!”

“Tea, huh?” I chuckle as I graciously take the mug from her. “I see you’re finally becoming a native Londoner. Good for you.”

“Well, since I never knew when you’d return,” she says in a mock-accusing tone, “you gave me no choice but to become one. Not that I mind…about becoming a Londoner, I mean. A lot’s changed since you’ve been gone…aside from the things I already told you.”

“Really? You’ll have to tell me everything too. You first.”

Hazel shrugs and smiles before admitting while her cheeks blush at the same time, “Well, you’d be surprised to know…I have a boyfriend now.”

“Really? No way!” I say, genuinely shocked. “Who’s the lucky fellow?”

“His name is Billy,” she says, her cheeks blushing even more at the mention of the name. “He’s really shy and handsome, and he really cares about me… I think.” She says that last bit with a frown, like she’s uncertain of whether or not that’s still true since the day they met.

“You ‘think’?” I ask, puzzled as to why she would think her boyfriend wouldn’t care about her, which makes no sense, especially with the way that she talks about him, like how one would talk about their celebrity crush.

“He talks about you a lot,” she frowns at me, and it almost sounds like an accusation toward me, which is weird, as I’ve never met anyone named Billy before.

“Me? Why? Do I know him?” How would her boyfriend know who I am, especially since I’ve been gone for almost two years? Then again, perhaps we had a class together during my first semester at the university, and he had attempted to get close to me at the time but never developed the courage until recently. When he found out Hazel was my best friend, he attempted to get close to her in order to get close to me and to find out when I’ll be back so that he can finally ask me out; only while I was gone, their friendship with one another went a different direction, and now he’s developed feelings for Hazel and moved on from me… Well, sort of, as he, apparently, is still profusely asking about me, despite being with Hazel.

“I don’t think so,” she frowns, unsure. “When we first started hanging out as regular friends, I briefly mentioned you as my best friend, and ever since then, he’s talked nonstop about how much he wants to meet you. He still does it to this day. It’s super annoying.”

“Wait! Did you tell him my secret?” I ask, frowning in concern. Could she really have told her boyfriend about my true identity—what I am, who my parents are? She couldn’t have told him about all this stuff, right; especially since I told her how vital it was to keep all of this a secret? She wouldn’t betray me like that…would she?

“No!” she shakes her head in a way like that’s the most ridiculous thing I could ever think her of doing. “Only that you’ve been my best friend since the First Grade and that time you saved my life when we were attacked by that Sultan at the arcade that summer in High School. I never mentioned your non-humanness or your superpowers, I swear; nor did I mention anything about your dad and his blue box. The only thing I mentioned about your dad is that he’s a traveler and you took the semester—and, later, year—off to travel with him. I never mentioned anything about time-travel or the blue box or anything like that.” She then pauses for a few seconds and frowns, admitting, “Though…the way he talks about you almost makes it sound like he does know all that stuff. It’s really weird. It’s almost… obsessive.”

“Hmm…” I frown before muttering, “I bet I know why.” Perhaps this guy does know who, and specifically what, I am. Perhaps he could be looking to take advantage of me and my energy in some way, like most of my parents’ enemies usually intend to do. Perhaps ‘Billy’ may not truly be who he says he is.

“What do you mean?” Hazel asks in seeming offense.

I shake my head and quickly lie, “Nothing. Never mind. Forget I said anything.”

“What?” she automatically accuses me. “You think Billy is an alien or something? You think he’s secretly here to take over the world or destroy it? You think his feelings for me are fake?”

I shake my head again. “What? No! I’m not thinking that at all…at least about his feelings for you being fake.” At least, not entirely, I think but don’t say out loud, knowing she’d go apeshit on me if I did. She’s angry enough with me as it is, even though she should be more angry with my father than anyone else. He’s the one who didn’t pay enough attention to the time-coordinates before he submitted them. He’s the one who made Hazel wait an ungodly amount of time for me to return, never knowing when I’d truly return, or if I’d ever return at all.

“So you think he is an alien?” she says, her anger rising. “You’ve never even met him!”

“No, but I would like to,” I say honestly. Not just to see if he’s an alien but also to see what he’s like and if he’s ‘the one’ for Hazel. Ever since we moved to London, she’s always fantasized about having a British boyfriend solely because of their ‘sexy accents.’

“What, so you can kick him off this planet for no reason?” she continues her accusation towards me.

Dude! Seriously?! I scoff in my head, getting tired of her behavior toward me since I came back. “Come on, Haze,” I sigh out loud, rolling my eyes, “you don’t need to be so dramatic. At least no more so than usual…”

“I’m not being dramatic!” she argues. “You are judging Billy before you even met him! How can you possibly know whether or not he’s an alien if you’ve never met him?”

“Whoa, chill out! I never said he was an actual alien!” I say, putting my hands up in surrender. “That’s just how I think about people now!”

“What?!” Hazel exclaims, now feeling great offense, and that’s when I realize that last bit came out wrong. Well, partially wrong.

“I didn’t mean it like that,” I say, trying to defend my last statement. “Well, kind of. I mean…” I sigh again, not knowing how best to defend what I said before. “I can’t help it! It’s just a stupid thought process I was taught from my dad. He taught me I shouldn’t trust people right away because I never know if they’re secretly aliens that want to do me or my planet harm. He says I shouldn’t trust people fully unless I know for sure that they’re not going to do any of that stuff. It’s a habit he recently got me into. I can’t help it! I’m sorry!”

“How could you think that about people?” she says, in utter disbelief. “Not everyone you meet is an alien, you know!”

I shrug, feeling obligated to disagree, given my true species. “Well, technically they are, but that—”

“What’s gotten into you?” she interrupts, shaking her head. “Since when did you start acting like this? Since you left way back when, you’ve come back different. You’re not the Nova I remember. The Nova I remember never acted this judgmental.”

I groan, wondering how many more times I have to say ‘I’m sorry’ before she finally accepts my apology as well as my new personality since I returned from my travels with Dad, and maybe even before my previous Regeneration. “I’m sorry! A lot’s changed in the last eight months—year and a half, whatever—and it’s not just from my last Regeneration… though maybe a part of it is. Regeneration doesn’t just change my body; it also changes my personality. I guess, in this Regeneration, I’m a lot more judgmental than I used to be, and I’m sorry if that offends you. Then again, I was also taught a whole new thought process since I last regenerated, so that could be part of it too. You have no idea what all I’ve been through in the last few weeks alone. I was stuck in a coma for what felt like sixteen years—which apparently aged me sixteen years—reliving my childhood from the ‘Sontaran’ incident at the arcade onward, but I had to face off with an alternate evil version of myself whom I had to hopelessly watch kill my parents. Then I was falsely accused of murdering an alien King and spent a hellish week in prison, being harassed and abused by inmates who had it out for my father, while, at the same time, discovering that Madame Kovarian had survived the explosion at the Silence base and was recruiting new members to bring her numbers back that had perished in the explosion. Now I’m dealing with the annoyance of my dad having screwed up the time-coordinates and brought me home a whole year late, making you wait an ungodly amount of time for me to come home and fear that I’ve died or stopped caring. And on top of all of that, you’ve had to deal with all those nightmares of Kovarian returning to taunt you about me never returning home, or worse. I’m sorry! How many more times do I have to say it?! Why can’t you just be happy that I’m finally back?!”

“I am happy you’re back, Nov, I really am,” Hazel says, and she genuinely sounds honest. “It’s just… Like I said, a lot’s changed since we’ve been apart. Even with Billy, it’s been lonely here without you. And you’ve been traveling around, doing who-knows-what who-knows-where, and I never know how long you’ll be gone, or if you’ll ever come home, having completely forgotten about me.”

“Haze, I would never forget you! How could I forget you?”

“I know, but for a while I thought you had forgotten me. Six months after you promised you’d come back, I started thinking that. I felt like I didn’t have a choice. You stopped responding to my messages, and I never knew why. I honestly thought something had happened to you, and I was worried, scared even; but you still never answered. I felt like I had no choice but to move on. Thankfully I met Billy around that time.”

I sigh. “As I said, I didn’t stop responding on purpose. If I’d known Dad had fat-fingered a time-coordinate by accident, this wouldn’t have been a problem. Plus, Time runs slower for you than it does for me. While in the TARDIS, a minute for me could be a month for you on Earth.”

“That’s so weird,” Hazel frowns. “How does that work?”

“I honestly have no idea,” I shrug back.

“Well, if you’re so adamant to find out if Billy is an alien,” she says as she pulls out her phone, “I can’t wait to prove you wrong. I’ll text him and ask him to come over and meet you.”

I frown. “Right now? While it’s raining?” Who would want to go out in this kind of weather?

“Yeah,” Hazel shrugs, “that’s the only time he can go outside—when it rains. He has a very rare skin condition that prevents him from going out in the sun; that’s why he looks so pale all the time. His skins burns really badly when it’s exposed to the sun; I mean, it literally smokes in the sun. It’s the strangest thing. He has to wear special clothing that repels sunbeams. Sometimes when it’s super sunny, he refuses to go outside at all, or anywhere the sun shines through. He always has to have the windows and blinds closed so no sun gets through at all.”

“Hmm…” I say, deepening my frown, “I never knew anyone to be so sensitive to the sun. He must be like a vampire, or something.” I say this last bit as a joke.

“I guess so,” she chuckles back. “Also, you’ll be happy to know I’ve got the other bedroom back there saved for you. I made sure to get a two-bedroom apartment when I moved here so that you could have your own bedroom, should you ever return. I’ve been using it for storage, but I can clear it out for you to move in. I kept a lot of your old things and stored them in the closet in there.”

“Oh, wow!” I say in genuine shock. “That’s really awesome! Thanks, Haze! When you mentioned you had a boyfriend, my first thought was you’d given the bedroom to him.” To me, the second bedroom already looked occupied from all the clutter I could see from my vantage point at the front door, but I never realized it was used for storage purposes only…at least, it would be like that until I came back, or when someone else was offered to use it. I figured Hazel would’ve given the extra room to her boyfriend, and I was surprised to find out that was not the case. It’s nice to think that, even after all this time, she still cares about me and thinks me as her ‘sister,’ and she has absolutely no idea how much that means to me.

Hazel shrugs and says honestly, “For a while, I thought about it but always changed my mind at the last second. If you’d returned after he’d occupied the other bedroom, I would’ve felt awful.”

“Nah, I would’ve been fine,” I shake my head. “I wouldn’t have minded taking the sofa…uh, if that was cool with you. I hardly sleep much anyway.”

“Are you sure you would’ve been okay with that?” Hazel asks, unsure of whether or not I would’ve truly minded. “I had almost given the room to him.”

“Seriously, that would not have been a problem. Look at it this way. If some psycho tried breaking into the apartment, they’ll have to face me first to get to you and Billy, wouldn’t they?”

“I guess so,” she shrugs before checking her phone. “Anyway, he says he’s on his way. He said he was just finishing something up with his mom and brother, and he’s walking over now. He and his mom and brother are relatively new here. They moved here about six months after you were originally supposed to come home. His mom’s the new school psychiatrist.”

“Interesting,” I say, raising a quizzical eyebrow. And strangely suspicious, I add in my head, thinking about the timing of their arrival, which, according to Hazel, was not long after I had originally planned to come home. The truth of why I think this is so suspicious is that, normally when news or rumors of Dad’s and my arrival spread, disaster strikes not long thereafter; that being said, I can’t help but think that Hazel’s new boyfriend and his mother and brother may not be all that they seem and may be here for more nefarious purposes, which may or may not involve me and my being a Time Lord. Scenarios like this generally tend to happen, no matter where Dad and I go. “Uh, but I’m sure Billy is really nice,” I finish quickly out loud. “I can’t wait to meet him too.”

“And don’t think about trying to steal him!” Hazel says in a way that I honestly can’t tell if she’s teasing or not. “He may have been impatient about meeting you, but he’s mine!”

“Hey, I wouldn’t dream of it,” I shake my head. “As you said, he’s your boyfriend. Plus, I don’t plan on dating anyone anytime soon…or maybe ever.” Which is sad, because I always imagined that I would fall in love and marry the perfect man, just like my mother with my father...well, at least after she had tried to kill him multiple times under the Silence’s influence. Not that this would ever happen to me, needless to say. I choose to keep this thought to myself, however.

“Why not?” Hazel asks, puzzled. “Coz you think it wouldn’t work between a human and a Time Lord?”

I sigh. “No, it’s not that. Actually, that worked well for my parents; you forget my mother is half-human. Anyway, it’s…something else.”

“What?” she asks, noticing my hesitance to explain, but I decide to go ahead and tell her anyway.

“Well, I was told that I would be betrayed by someone I would fall in love with,” I shrug, “or by someone who would fall in love with me; I’m really not sure. It wasn’t entirely clear. Most prophecies aren’t.”

“There’s a whole prophecy about you?” Hazel frowns with concern.

“Well, I wouldn’t call it a ‘whole’ prophecy. More like broken pieces of one, though I don’t know if they have any connection with each other. I mean, none of them have happened yet…at least as far as I know. From what I was told about them—which wasn’t really much—they all sounded completely separate.” In all honesty, I’m not entirely sure if these three things are considered as a legit prophecy, but they definitely sounded prophetic to me with the way the Shopkeeper mentioned them. 

“What were they?” Hazel asks curiously.

I sigh before explaining. “Well, there’s that one I mentioned—about me being betrayed by a future lover. Then I was told I would reunite with someone whom I’ve ‘thought to be long dead’; I’m not sure who that could be.” I then pause before admitting, “But the third one scares me the most.”

“What is it?”

“Well, I was told that ‘a great darkness’ was coming for me, and when it comes, I would ‘be obligated to make a sacrifice’ that would make me ‘lose everything in the end.’” I say each part with air-quotes.

“‘A great darkness’?” Hazel frowns. “Could that be the Silence?”

I shrug. “Maybe. They could be the ‘darkness,’ or a part of it. Or maybe they’ll somehow be affected by the ‘darkness.’ I’m really not sure. I’m sure they have some part of it, though.”

Could this last thing be linked to Dad’s “Silence will fall” prophecy? Could ‘the darkness’ be the so-called ‘Fall of the Eleventh’ or what causes the Silence to ‘fall?’

“And the part about you having to make a sacrifice…” Hazel asks nervously. “What sort of sacrifice would you have to make? I hope it’s nothing like…your life.”

“Me too,” I nod. “That’s the part that scares me. I’m not sure what I’ll be forced to sacrifice, but I was told it’s something big.” I am genuinely still surprised by how much it seemed to scare the Shopkeeper to make him feel genuine sorrow for me.

‘ What you will lose… I hope it’s worth it.’ Could he have meant my life?

“Do you believe any of that stuff is actually true?”

“I don’t know,” I shrug. “The guy that told me claimed that he’d seen these things happen in my future in a vision, so whether or not I believe them doesn’t really matter.”

Hazel shrugs. “Well, even if they do happen, I’m sure you’ll be able to find a way around them, right, like your dad at the lake? Or, if not, maybe they’ll end up being a lot less gruesome than you think.”

“God, I sure hope so,” I sigh heavily. “Only Time will tell.”

Our conversation is interrupted when there is a sudden loud knock on the door to the apartment. Upon hearing this, I automatically jump up from the sofa and stand in front of the door with my sonic screwdriver in hand, thinking the person on the other side is a dangerous intruder, particularly a surviving Silence member that had come back for me after somehow discovering my return.

“Wait!” Hazel says, pulling me back by the shoulder. “I think it might be Billy.”

“How can you be sure?” I say doubtfully as my protective instincts eat away at my brain.

“He says he’s outside the door,” Hazel confirms, holding up her phone to show her latest text message from him saying ‘I’m here outside door’ along with a kissy-face emoji. Still in doubt, I watch as she steps past me and opens the door. “Hey, babes,” she greets the person on the other side with a smile. “Glad you could come over.”

“Same here,” answers an extremely pale blonde boy in a British accent, wearing all black, who steps into the apartment, lowering his hood. “The weather’s gotten worse out there. Thankfully I arrived here just in time.”

As Hazel goes to kiss him, he oddly dodges the kiss and forces her to peck his cheek instead. After she kisses him, apparently not thinking too much about his obvious dodge, and closes the apartment door, Hazel comments on her belief that the boy didn’t seem to mind storms since he always seems to insist on going out when the sun isn’t out. Admittedly to me, this is very odd behavior, but given the boy’s aforementioned ‘skin condition,’ I shouldn’t judge, at least too much.

“Oh, hi,” he says once he sees me and holds out a hand for me to shake. “I’m Billy, Hazel’s boyfriend. You’re Nova, right?”

At first, I think about confirming my true identity (minus the “being a Time Lord” part, of course), but I decide against it at the last second, feeling that using my old ‘Sydney Elise’ persona around him and whenever I’m out in public might be safer from now on. I remember Dad recommending that I do this while I’m out traveling on my own, and to only use my true name around people I trust.

“No,” I say at the same time as Hazel says “Yes,” which, no surprise, greatly confuses Billy (if that’s even his real name). He frowns at both of us, but mostly at me, seemingly believing that I’m lying about my true identity, which I obviously am for safety reasons. Ignoring the awkward silence that follows, I shrug and say, “Ah, that’s just a silly nickname. My real name is Sydney. Sydney Elise. How do you do?”

When I shake his hand, it feels super cold and clammy to the touch, almost like how a corpse would feel. Then again, he’d just come from being out in the cold rain, so his clamminess could simply come from that—nothing unnatural about that at all, right? Seeing Hazel’s quizzical frown, I shoot her a pleading ‘just go along with it, I’ll explain later’ look back.

“Nov, what—?” she attempts to ask anyway, but I stop her, deepening my glare.

‘Shut up, Haze,’ I snap at her, projecting my thoughts telepathically to her, thinking my sideways look wasn’t enough to make her understand the importance of my message. ‘I’ll explain later. Just go along with it, please, I’m serious.’ Once I finish my message, I see her eyes widen in shock at the fact that I’d just spoken to her telepathically and is rendered silent seemingly out of fear. I turn back to Billy and smile in a poor attempt to act like nothing is wrong.

“Uh…okay then, Sydney,” he says in a confused tone (though, to me, his tone seems more doubtful) but remains polite. “Nice to meet you too. Hazel’s told me all about you. About your childhood together… About the alien attack at your local arcade that you saved her life from; that was a particularly interesting story. That must’ve been utterly terrifying for you. It definitely was for Hazel.”

“Uh, yeah, it was,” I nod, trying to speak through the perspective of a regular human being. “I thought that Sont—uh, thing was going to kill us. Thank God it didn’t.” Since I’ve been traveling with Dad for so long, he’s taught my mind to think like a true Time Lord, but since I’ve returned to life on Earth (at least temporarily), it’s going to take a while to get my mind back to thinking like a regular human, lest my true identity be exposed.

“Haze said she was shot in the arm,” Billy continues, “and you healed her. How did you do that? She refuses to tell me.”

“Yeah, I did!” Hazel speaks up. “I told you it was with a special ointment in my family’s First-Aid Kit. She used it on my arm, and it healed.”

I give a subtle smile towards her for her clever coverup for my Regeneration Energy before shrugging at Billy in agreement. “It’s true. That was literally all I used.”

He sighs in seeming disappointment at my response, making me think he was expecting me to reveal my Regeneration power to him, which I, of course, would never do, especially around him, who I’ve only just met. “Well, you must be a really good doctor then,” he says, enunciating the word ‘doctor’ like he knows my secret anyway (despite Hazel claiming that she never told him), as well as saying the word with a hint of disgust, which ups my suspicions towards him.

“Uh…yeah,” I say, frowning at him and shifting uncomfortably on my feet. “I guess I am.”

Ignoring the awkwardness (or as a way of putting his ‘poker face’ back on), he smiles as he drapes his arm over Hazel’s shoulders like how a typical boyfriend would do with his girlfriend. “Well, it’s good to have you back,” he says, sounding almost completely honest. “Haze told me you were supposed to come back last year, but you never came back. She got so worried; said she hadn’t heard from you all year. Where were you all this time?”

“I was…traveling,” I shrug, feeling that that’s the best lie (at least one that he’ll actually believe) I can come up with…well, more of a partial lie.

Billy frowns, not seeming to buy my lie. “Really? Nonstop? For almost two years?”

“Uh…yeah,” I say as I struggle to come up with a believable story. “We…ended up having to extend our trip. We didn’t really expect to; it just sort of…happened. Sorry. I would’ve come back sooner, but there were, uh…complications. Anyway, I’m back now.”

“Good. We really needed you,” Billy says before pausing and rephrasing what he just said, thinking that last bit sounded slightly creepier than he intended. “Uh, Hazel did. She said she’d missed her ‘sister’ and longed for her to come back.”

“Well, here I am, back again!” I say, spreading my arms out like a showman. “Tada!”

“You’ll have to tell us about where you’ve been all this time,” he suggests, his voice sounding eager. “I’m sure you’ve got some great stories to tell. I’d love to hear them. I assume that’s why Hazel invited me here…” He turns to her for clarification, but she looks at me for clarification instead, making me feel obligated to agree.

“Uh…yes. I suppose I could,” I tell Billy, shrugging uncomfortably.

“Brilliant!” he smiles like an excited kid at Christmas. “We’re all ears!”

I groan internally as we return to the Living Room. After Hazel brews more hot tea for us, I spend the next few hours coming up with believable stories to tell Billy without making him suspicious as well as reveal anything about my secret. I try answering his questions as ‘truthfully’ as possible, thankfully with Hazel’s help. I am very appreciative of her whenever she interrupts me and makes up stories of her own, at least when talking about our childhood, to help mask my true identity and the truth of my family and my travels. I make up a story about my parents as explorers, with my mother as an Archaeologist (which is already true) and father as a Historian, and how I accompanied them on their adventures and expeditions most of the year as their assistant.

At one point, I learn a little about Billy—how he and his mother and brother moved from Blackpool, England after a major family crisis that they intended to escape and start a fresh new life. Unfortunately, I couldn't get many details from him, as, strangely enough, he seems more interested in learning about me rather than talking about his own life. When he asks about my ‘nickname,’ I explain how my parents were very into Astronomy and “all things Outer Space,” that being where the name ‘Nova’ came from (which is a half-lie, of course). “Seriously, it’s just a stupid nickname,” I shrug and laugh, trying to sound embarrassed. “You can call me Sydney. That’s what I prefer.”

“Okay then,” he shrugs in seeming disappointment, again like he expected me to admit who I really am, which I, of course, don’t. “As always, it was brilliant to meet you, Sydney.” Again, he enunciates the word ‘Sydney’ like he’s not convinced that that’s my true name, which, again, isn’t.

“You too,” I say, shaking Billy’s ice-cold hand, before sighing and saying, “Well, I should get to bed. As you know, I had a long trip, and I’m exhausted.”

“Sure, you are,” he says in a way like he totally believes me. “I can totally understand, you being gone for an entire year.”

“Trust me, it was much longer than that,” I mutter before smiling and suggesting kindly, “Anyway, I’m sure we can do something together tomorrow. I’ll have to enroll for classes before they start in a few weeks. That is, if I’m still enrolled…”

“I’m sure you are, Nov—Syd,” Hazel says before quickly correcting my nickname.

“Yes, I would love that,” Billy agrees, smiling back.

“Wait,” Hazel turns to her boyfriend, frowning at him, “it’s supposed to be sunny tomorrow. I thought you couldn’t be out in the sun. You’ll burn.”

“I’ll just wear extra sunscreen,” he shrugs.

“I thought sunscreen didn’t work for you,” I frown at him. “Hazel told me about your skin condition. I’m sorry.”

“That’s alright,” he shrugs before suggesting, “Maybe you guys can come over to my place; that way I won’t have to go outside.”

This suggestion, for some reason, makes an uncomfortable feeling run down my spine, but, thankfully, Hazel speaks up, suggesting in an apologetic tone, “Um…actually, Billy… I was kinda planning to do something tomorrow with Syd, just the two of us. I haven’t seen her in ages, you understand, and I’d like to catch up with my ‘sister’ alone.”

Her boyfriend frowns, seeming hurt, and maybe a tad bit angry too, at least to me. “Oh. Okay. No worries. We’ll just hang out another time. Just text me.”

“I will,” she smiles as she pecks his cheek again, this time voluntarily, as we all rise to our feet and head toward the exit. “I’m sorry, babe. It’s nothing personal. It’s just…she’s been gone so long…”

“I get it,” Billy says as he raises the hood of his jacket up and steps out into the pouring rain. “I’ll see you guys later.”

“Bye, Billy,” I wave at him.

“Bye, babes. I’m sorry,” Hazel says before closing the apartment door behind him. She then asks, turning back to me, “Still think he’s an alien?”

“Perhaps not,” I shrug back, trying not to make it sound like a lie, even though it does sound like one to me.

Stupid rule! I grumble to myself, thinking of Dad’s number-one rule, ‘The Doctor lies.’ Why does that have to be ‘Number One’ with you, Dad? Why does that have to be ‘Rule Number One’ for anyone? It’s ridiculous!

“Is that a lie?” Hazel asks suspiciously, sensing that it’s, indeed, a lie.

“Of course not!” I lie once more. “You’ve convinced me; he’s a perfectly ordinary guy. I’m sorry I believed otherwise.”

“You better be,” she snorts before returning to the sofa and frowning. “That being said, why did you insist on using your other name with Billy? Surely using your real name would’ve been absolutely fine? I mean, there’re lots of girls in the world named Nova, right?”

“Right,” I shrug, continuing to lie; at least, that’s what it feels like I’m doing, but I’m not entirely sure. “I don’t know. I guess I just…felt like using it again, since that’s the name I enrolled here as. I figured I’d start using it again, since I kinda miss using it.” The last part isn’t entirely a lie, as I truly miss the days when I believed ‘Sydney Marie Elise’ was my true name…at least until I was proven otherwise. Oh, how much I would give to go back to that life. Oh, how much I would give to make that life a reality once again—permanently, this time.

“No, you don’t,” she says in an accusatory tone, shaking her head. “Don’t lie. You’re really bad at it.”

“I’m not lying…” I frown back, “at least not fully. I genuinely miss hearing my other name. That, and I don’t want anybody knowing my true name in case…you know…people are not who they say they are.”

“What, like Billy?” Hazel snaps, now seeming offended. “After everything he told you about himself, you still think him to secretly be an alien, deep down? He’s not, Nova! He really isn’t! I’ve known him for six months! Sure, he’s a little odd with the way he acts and dresses, but it’s because of his condition; it’s something I have to keep reminding myself of. Unlike you, I don’t judge him too much about it.”

“Look, I’m sorry, okay?” I groan. “I don’t mean to judge Billy behind his back. As I said, it’s a stupid thought process my father got me into. Trust me, I don’t appreciate it. I can’t help it! He’s taught me a lot of things; things I never even thought possible! I wish I could explain everything to you, but…you just wouldn’t understand.”

“Why? Coz I’m human?” she continues accusing me for what seems, to me, like absolutely no reason, before paraphrasing what my father said long ago. “Coz my ‘undeveloped human brain’ couldn’t possibly understand how Time Lord technology—or Time Lord ‘things’ in general—works? What’s gotten into you, Nova? You’ve changed so much!”

“I told you; a lot has changed!” I sigh, thinking this argument is getting pointless. “As Dad says, it’s ‘the curse of the Time Lords’! I don’t have any control over that! Believe me, I really wish I could! How much I would give to be human again—permanently! But I can’t! I have a responsibility now! Once Dad dies, someone has to take over the family business as ‘the next Doctor’! I am the only one who can take over! There’s no-one else, not even my mother! There are no other Time Lords! There’s just us! Just me! I’m sorry, Haze, but you just can’t understand that, no matter how much you want to! I have to do this alone! It’s my destiny!”

“And here I thought you didn’t give a shit about destiny,” she says as tears begin slipping down her cheeks. “You seemed very clear about that earlier, when you mentioned that ‘prophecy’ about you sacrificing everything in the end.”

“That’s different!” I protest. “That’s…” I pause, now struggling to understand the stress Dad has unconsciously put me in and explain it in a way my best friend would understand, but I just can’t for the life of me, which infuriates me beyond belief. “It’s complicated!” I groan. “I can’t explain it!” I am having a hard time explaining it even to myself, but I feel embarrassed to admit it in front of her.

“Then don’t!” she snaps back. “As you said, I’m only human. I can’t possibly understand Time Lord things, no matter how much I want to. I’ll never understand. I’ll never understand anything about you Time Lords…whatever that even is anymore.” She then looks up at me with puffy eyes, but through her eyes, I can see a complete stranger reflecting back. “I don’t even know who you are anymore…” she admits with a regretful sigh.

Her words render me almost completely and utterly speechless. How could she say that? How could she say that, after all we’ve been through?

“Haze—” I start to say, desperately wanting to prove her otherwise—that nothing has truly changed between us, and that I’m still the same girl she’s known since the First Grade, despite being gone for so long and coming into my Time Lord heritage during that time—but she stops me.

“I’m going to bed early,” she sniffles as she turns away toward her room, refusing to look at me anymore. “As I said, I saved that other room for you; it’s got your own bathroom and everything. I hope you like it. I also left you a spare key on your table. See you in the morning…unless you choose to leave again.” She then enters her bedroom and immediately slams the door, indicating that she’s through talking for the night.

I desperately want to call her back and tell her she’s being ridiculous with thinking I’ve come back an entirely different person—a complete stranger—which I’m not, but instead I sigh and gather my things and bring them to the spare bedroom Hazel saved for me. I unceremoniously drop my belongings on the floor and kick one of the legs of the bed in anger before cursing in pain and sitting on the side of the bed while rubbing the sore spot on my foot.

As I soothe my aching foot, I see a framed picture at the corner of my eye on the nightstand, and I reach out to inspect it. I immediately recognize the selfie Hazel took of us together overlooking the city while atop the London Eye just an hour before disaster struck and both of our lives changed forever (mine, in particular, quite literally changing because of Regeneration). The time at which the photo was taken was also the last time in our lives when things were truly normal between us, before I knew anything of my Time Lord heritage, and everything began making less and less sense. Before our ‘sisterhood’ began truly tearing apart…until now.

On that thought, as I sadly reminisce the event, I begin hearing Hazel sobbing in the room on the other side of the wall from mine. Through the wall, I can sense her sadness to have lost her best friend—no, her sister—even though I am physically in the room next door to her. I can also sense her anger at how much both of our lives have changed over the last two years (at least from Hazel’s point of view) and her longing for things to return to the way they were before I told her my secret, which makes me think more on the possibility of wiping her memory of the events. Perhaps Haze would’ve been safer, had she not known my secret. Admittedly, I feel stupid to not have done what my guardians told me, about not telling anyone else about my secret, knowing how dangerous the knowledge would cause; but at the time I didn’t care, and I never knew how truly dangerous things would’ve become until now. A small part of me wishes I never told Hazel in the first place.

Then again, if I’d never told her, I would’ve felt even more alone then than how I felt after I told her, and maybe even more then than I still do at this very moment. Before I told her, I hoped I would’ve had a forgotten Time Lord sister somewhere in the universe to share my secret with—of course that was before I found out I did have a sister that was exactly like me, according to my father, but she had died saving his life—but until then, I felt like I just couldn’t keep it between my guardians and myself, and I feared I would feel so alone if I didn’t tell at least one person outside the house. I honestly don’t think I would’ve been able to live with myself, had I never told Hazel my secret, and for a while I was so glad I did and that she accepted it so easily. Now, I’m not so sure anymore, as she doesn’t seem to accept it the way she used to, or that she flat-out refuses to accept it as it is now.

I can’t help but think that this is what Regeneration generally feels like for a Time Lord; frankly, I never thought to ask my father about it, and a small part of me regrets not asking. I know how much of a struggle it is for people to accept change (especially for me), and I can imagine it being an even bigger struggle with Time Lords, especially when it’s their time to regenerate, or when other people witness it who are witnessing it for the first time. I can imagine how hard it must’ve been for Dad’s past companions to witness his Regeneration firsthand, how scary it must’ve felt, and how long it must’ve took to accept the change—accept the fact that this new person standing in front of them is still the Doctor (still my father) they’ve known since the beginning, just with a new face—whether one managed to accept it at all, and I feel like I am experiencing this exact thing with Hazel. Frustratingly, I feel like Hazel is refusing to accept my new body and personality since my previous Regeneration, and I don’t know what to do to help Hazel accept the change or even show I’m still me.

Regrettably, I feel the only way she would accept is by having her memories erased, but I refuse to do that, especially after hearing Dad’s story of when he had no choice but to do this to his friend, Donna Noble, to save her life. Not that wiping Hazel’s memories of me would kill her (even though the exact opposite had happened to Donna), but I just don’t think I’ll be able to live with myself if I had to go through the exact same thing as Dad, but with Hazel instead of Donna. I remember Hazel making it very clear that she didn’t want her memories to be wiped, but, regardless of what she said, I choose to keep the possibility in the cards for now, but I hope to God to never actually have to pull it out and use it.

Dear God, please, please, please don’t make me. I’ll never forgive you if you do…

I suddenly remember the fear of my ‘non-humanness’ putting a huge strain on my friendship with Hazel, and how this exact fear had just come to light during our earlier argument. I feared that things would change so much between us to the point of us becoming distant from one another because of the differences between us that have appeared over the last several months. No matter where I went or how long I’d be away from her, I always believed things would stay the same between us, no matter what’s changed in our lives, and we would “always stick together, for better or worse”, but things have gotten worse because of these changes, and I can’t help but feel like the changes won’t bring us back together and keep us together, just as I’d feared way back when.

This thought also makes me think of that time in my ‘coma world,’ when Hazel behaved almost identically toward me in that world as she did five minutes ago. How she refused to even look me in the eye because she couldn’t see me, and not at all because of true blindness. How she was no longer able to see me for who I truly was and still am to her to this day, even an entire year later—Nova Susan Song as well as Sydney Marie Elise. How now, she no longer sees me as a best friend but, rather, as a complete stranger. It’s honestly hard to imagine whether Hazel had ever come to the same conclusion and feared the same, or whether she’ll ever truly see how much her behavior has hurt me and how much I’ve hurt her since the day I told her my secret.

As I feel my eyes filling with tears, I think about how much we both have struggled and suffered in our own ways while we’ve been apart—with Hazel experiencing nightmares and fears of me never coming home, and me struggling to process everything I’ve been taught by my father while on our travels together in Time and Space—and I sincerely hope things will be better between us in the morning after a good night’s rest. I have longed for a long vacation from Timelording, and I can imagine Hazel has longed for a good night’s sleep for the first time in a year and a half as well as have her ‘sister’ back, especially now that I’ve returned.

Whether my return is temporary or not, it doesn’t matter. I will make sure things get better between us in the days, weeks, and months moving forward, and I will not let anything get in my way until I do. I swear.

Chapter Text

Later that night, I have a seriously hard time forcing myself to sleep, for two reasons. The first is the noises I keep hearing inside the house as well as outside. Every noise I hear, whether it’s just the light rain and wind from outside or the typical ‘house noises’ from inside, I keep thinking them to be signs of imminent danger instead. Also, I can’t seem to shake the feeling that once I do manage to properly fall asleep, the danger will appear and interrupt me from my peaceful slumber, much like how it feels for someone to wake up hours before their alarm goes off and they can’t go back to sleep thinking the alarm will go off anyway.

The second is that I can’t seem to stop thinking about Hazel’s and my earlier argument. As ridiculous as it all was, I can’t believe we’d even had that argument in the first place. The things she said to me… How could she think all those things about me? Sure, I’ve been gone longer than I meant to, but deep down I haven’t actually changed; why does she seem to think I have all of a sudden? Even after having witnessed my previous Regeneration firsthand without having any problem with it back then, why does she suddenly have a problem with it now? Why does she seem to think that I haven’t truly come home—that I’m still out there somewhere in the universe, travelling in the TARDIS without a care in the world about ever returning to her—despite having stood right in front of her that whole time we were arguing?

Why does she look at me, but she can’t truly see me? Why can’t she see that I have truly returned, that I truly do still care about her enough to return? Why can’t she see that I’m still me, despite everything I was taught while I was away and all the things she went through in my absence? What could I possibly do to prove that I’m still me, assuming she’d even let me? When will things ever return to normal between us?

When will things ever return to normal in my own life?

More and more questions keep popping into my head, and I can’t seem to stop them from flooding in. The more questions that come flooding in, the less I am able to shut my mind completely down to get some proper sleep, which seems impossible now with the mental dam keeping the onslaught of questions back now broken. Because of this, I decide to get out of bed, get dressed, and quietly sneak out of the apartment to take a short walk to clear my head, bringing Hazel’s spare key with me.

Even if Hazel hears me leaving (I doubt it, since she should be completely asleep by now, seeing as it’s well after midnight—close to two in the morning), hopefully she wouldn’t think I’m leaving her forever. I only plan to be gone for an hour and no more; no worries, right? Then again, even if she did hear me leaving, she probably wouldn’t care either way, seeing as she’s still quite angry with me for leaving her all alone for so long…well, at least before she met Billy. I imagine he took great care of her and assured her that I would come back one day (which I obviously did); surely, she believed him, right? At least I kept my promise to return, even if I’d returned an entire year late, which wasn’t even my fault. Surely, even while I was gone that entire year, Hazel knew I’d return at some point and never truly lost hope, despite saying that she had.

I guess ‘Rule Number One’ has rubbed off on her too.

Since it’s still lightly raining outside, I slip on my rain jacket and flip the hood over my head to protect my giant frizz-ball of auburn curls from getting too wet, and I step out into the chilly night, locking the apartment door behind me with Hazel’s spare key (yes, I brought my sonic screwdriver as well, just in case I need to use it, even when I don’t plan to since I plan on being human while I’m back on Earth).

While I’m out on my walk through the quiet streets of London, other than me, I see very few people out walking as well, probably going to or getting off from a late shift at work. Normally, people would feel uncomfortable being out this late after dark, but a small part of me begs to differ, as being out in the city this late feels much cozier, quieter, and less crowded than during the day; there’s even something about walking in the rain (that I can’t quite put my finger on) that gives a calming effect as well. I don’t have a particular set destination or route, so I just aimlessly walk, taking random turns down random streets, and when I feel like going back to the apartment, I can easily get my bearings and return, as I’ve gotten very familiar with the layout of the city while spending the previous semester (which was technically three semesters ago in real time) in college; I seriously doubt anything has physically changed much with the city since I’ve been gone.

For the first twenty minutes, everything is chill and quiet, but later strange things start happening, particularly the odd noises I keep hearing behind me, like someone creeping up to me about to jump me from behind, but when I turn to look, there’s no one there. Only when I turn away and begin walking in my regular direction again do I begin hearing the noises, but every time I look back round, the noises immediately stop, but not before there’s a shuffling sound like someone slipping quickly out of sight to hide. When this repeats for a third time, I start to get a sense like I’m being stalked like prey; however, every time I look back around in hopes of catching the predator in the act, there would be no one there, or really anywhere. At this point, I start to just ignore them, telling myself that it’s just birds or the wind and rain or some irrational fear of danger even when there’s no obvious danger present. I even begin having a hard time calming myself, as I can’t help but think I’m becoming a schizophrenic by hearing things that aren’t actually there, constantly feeling paranoid for absolutely no reason.

“Great,” I mutter to myself in a growl, “now you’ve turned me into a schizophrenic. Thanks a lot, Dad.” My statement makes me wonder if this is normal behavior for Time Lords, constantly feeling worried for their surroundings and the people they’re with. Then again, some might think of that thought process as vigilance rather than schizophrenia; though I can’t decide if my particular way of thinking is considered as vigilance or schizophrenia, what with my heightened sense of danger and awareness since my previous Regeneration as well as everything my father had taught me.

Chill out, Nova, I sigh to myself, shaking my head, there’s no danger around. There’s nothing or no one following you. It’s probably just another late-night walker who’s having as much of a stressful night as you; totally normal, nothing to worry about. You’re just being paranoid for no reas—

My thoughts are interrupted when I suddenly hear a shrill scream from the alleyway I’d just past.

Okay. That’s not just in my head. That’s real. Guess I can’t ignore it now.

I immediately turn back around and rush to the side alley and peer down it from the street, and I witness a horrific sight. I see a homeless woman, who looked like she was sleeping peacefully against the wall when she was suddenly woken up by what looks like a teenage boy, literally biting the side of her neck. The woman screams in agonizing pain as the boy appears to bite harder into her flesh like some sort of bloodthirsty cannibal.

“HEY!” I yell at the boy. “LEAVE HER ALONE!” As I begin rushing to the woman’s aid, the boy looks up at me and growls at me, his jaw and front—as well as extraordinarily sharp teeth, like a vampire—stained with blood, before he turns toward the opposite end of the alley, further into the darkness, and rushes away in the literal blink of an eye, leaving behind a thick trail of dust in his wake.

What the… How did he disappear so quickly? That was definitely not human…

Since I can’t run after the boy, as he was way too fast for me—much faster than a normal human—I decide to stick around to help the injured woman. I gasp when I see a massive chunk of the side of her neck has been torn away, and thick blood runs out of the wound like a waterfall, staining her entire side and the ground below her. The sight makes me think of the time in Victorian London when Dad and I found the woman (I believe her name was Mary, according to her pigheaded husband who accused us of her murder) being attacked by a ‘fear’-projection of Jack the Ripper.

I slowly kneel down at the woman’s level, and she stares at me as if afraid that I will attack her too. “It’s alright, ma’am,” I say calmly as I gently lower my hood to show I’m not a threat. “I’m not gonna hurt you. I can help you.” I smile warmly at her, which calms her down a bit, before I lay one hand on her shoulder and raise my other hand, prepared to use my Regeneration Energy to heal her. However, I pause at the last second, having second thoughts about using my Energy; as much as I want to use it, doing so would risk exposing me to other dangers in the area besides the mysterious cannibal-boy who’d run off. I squeeze my hands into fists to hold back the Energy, and I say instead, pulling out my phone, “I’ll call an ambulance for you.” I immediately call 9-1-1, but I suddenly remember that here in the UK they use a different number to call the police, which is 9-9-9, so I dial that instead.

“9-9-9, what’s your emergency?” the operator answers after two tones.

“Hello?” I reply, my voice sounding frantic. “I was just walking along, and I found a woman in an alley. She’s gravely injured. She’s bleeding profusely from the side of her neck. When I found her, she was being attacked by…someone; I couldn’t make out who, but at first it looked like a teenage boy. He had bitten a large chunk off of the woman’s neck. He had very sharp teeth, like a vampire. He ran off before I could get a good look at him. Please, how fast can you send an ambulance over? She may not have much time; she’s losing a lot of blood!” At this point, I can see the woman seemingly begin losing the ability to stay conscious, likely from the blood-loss.

The operator then asks where my exact location is, and after I give it, she says, “Don’t worry, ma’am; an ambulance is on its way to you. Please stay and monitor the woman until they get there.”

After I hang up, I assure the woman that the police and ambulance are on their way as I try keeping her calm and conscious, using the same methods my father used to keep the young woman, Mary, from Victorian London calm, at least before she died from her wounds inflicted upon her by ‘Jack the Ripper.’ Unlike last time, I make sure this woman survives even after the ambulance and police arrive. While I wait for them to arrive, I seriously think about using my Regeneration Energy as a way to speed up the healing process, nervous that the police wouldn’t be fast enough. Thankfully, I begin hearing police sirens in the near distance a few seconds later, and I change my mind again about using my Energy as I breathe a huge sigh of relief, as does the woman; she’s going to survive this, after all. After the police arrive, the paramedics tend to the woman while I talk with the police and give my statement on what I saw during the attack—at least, the end of it.

“We appreciate your assistance, ma’am,” the policeman says sincerely after I finish giving my description of the attack to the best of my ability. “We’ll give you a call if we require further information from you.”

“No problem, Officer,” I smile back proudly. “I was happy to help.” In all honesty, a large part of me hopes that they don’t call me back, just in case they require more than just my statement (i.e. some sort of medical record from me).

The man’s partner, a policewoman, speaks up, saying, “Ma’am, you are aware of the citywide curfew going on, right?”

“Um, ‘citywide curfew’?” I ask, genuinely puzzled. “What’s that?” I mean, I know what ‘citywide curfew’ means; I just wasn’t aware of there being one put in place since I got back, and apparently one that’s been happening for a while. Hazel must’ve forgotten to tell me; that, or I didn’t think to ask about it as our argument distracted me from asking. I had already planned to spend the next morning researching the latest current events that I’d missed out on over the last year and a half, and I had absolutely no idea there’d be a serious curfew going on every night since before my return.

If only I’d known about the curfew before I went on my walk…

“Yes, ma’am,” the policewoman confirms. “Since about six months ago, there have been various attacks throughout the city, most happening after dark and by what witnesses describe as ‘a vampire’; and some witnesses claimed to have been attacked by more than one. Since then, we asked that everyone within the city stay indoors after nightfall because of the ongoing attacks. Those who are required to be out at night are asked to travel either by public transport or with a friend so they’re not alone, as the majority of the victims that are attacked are found traveling alone.”

“Oh wow!” I say, shocked. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize. I had just gotten back home late last night from a long trip out-of-country, so I had no idea. I’ll make sure to pay attention next time.”

“Yes, you do that,” the policewoman nods, thankfully not asking any questions about my ‘long trip out-of-country.’ “If you live nearby, I’d suggest that you return home immediately and remain there ‘til sunrise, and don’t go out after dark unless absolutely necessary.”

“Will do,” I nod. “Thanks a lot, Officer.”

“No, thank you, ma’am,” the policeman speaks up. “If you hadn’t found the woman and reported the situation to us when you did, she would likely not have survived. She’ll make a slow but full recovery, thanks to you. In spite of the citywide curfew, you’re a hero.”

“That being said,” his partner adds in a serious tone, “we’ll let you off with a warning this one time. If you’re caught out after dark without a permit again, we may not be so generous.”

Wow, I frown disapprovingly at her, I’d just ‘broken the law’ and ignored the curfew (not that I knew about the curfew in the first place) to save a woman’s life, and this is the ‘thanks’ I get? Seriously?! “Noted,” I say out loud before turning to the friendlier policeman and saying, “Thanks again, officers. Y’all have a good night.”

“You as well, miss,” he says with a smile and nodding to me in a way that almost resembles a bow. “Be careful getting home now. Don’t hesitate to call us again if you see any more suspicious activity.”

Unless it’s something alien, I think to myself, in which case, it’ll be my responsibility to take care of it, not you guys.

On that note, I smile back at the police officers before rushing away back toward Hazel’s apartment, using my regular GPS app on my phone to get back.

Apparently, the app puts me on a different route back, because it suggests that I take a shortcut through a shady and not so well lit park (though the park is actually a lot nicer during the day), but I decide to take it anyway, thinking it’ll take me back quicker rather than take the long way around on the normal streets; the police officers warned me that I shouldn’t waste too much time in getting home, anyway.

However, as I enter the park, I begin hearing strange noises again, like someone is lurking in the darkness, circling me, again like a predator to prey. My sense of danger heightens when the noises become louder and more frequent, and this time the senses are legit…at least they feel that way, though I’m not entirely sure.

“Hello?” I call out as I look around for the source of the noises. “Who’s there?”

However, I find nothing and no one, despite still hearing the noises all around me that are not the typical ‘wind’ noises, even though the wind and rain has picked up a bit at this point. At the corners of my eyes, I keep seeing what looks like shadows lurking behind the trees, but it’s tough to see even with my enhanced Time Lord night-vision. Still believing that the senses of danger are fake, I eventually shake my head, thinking my paranoia is, yet again, playing tricks on my mind, and I continue walking, yet again ignoring the noises.

It's just the wind; nothing to worry about… It’s just the wind; nothing to worry about… It’s just the wind; nothing to wo—

“You shouldn’t have stopped me, little human,” a deep voice growls from a few feet behind me.

“What?” I gasp, startled as I turn to see a tall, hooded, and extremely pale twenty-year-old boy, his clothes soaked through in both rain and blood. Based on this description, I instantly recognize him to be the boy from earlier—the one who attacked that poor homeless woman in the alley. “Oh…” I frown at the boy. “It’s you. You’re that kid I saw earlier. The one who attacked that poor woman in the alley…”

So, what; he’s followed me here to get revenge, or something, for stopping him?

“She would’ve made a fine meal, had you not stopped me when you did,” he growls again, confirming my theory and taking a predatory step towards me.

“Excuse me?” I say, taking a cautious step back. “Who are you?” I pause, sensing that this boy isn’t human, at least entirely. “What are you?”

“Better question you should be asking is ‘what are you?’” the boy chuckles back. “What are you to me?”

I frown, confused. “Um… I don’t know. What am I to you? You know what I am too?”

Does he know I’m a Time Lord? I wonder. Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised one bit. Seriously, am I ever gonna have a chance to be a proper human again; or if I do, it only lasts a couple hours and no more? Honestly, I don’t think I could bear that.

“I do,” he sniggers as he takes more menacing steps towards me. “I do know what you are.”

“Um…okay,” I say as I continue backing uneasily away from him as he approaches, my senses of danger now becoming more legitimate by the nanosecond. “Great. And…what would that be then?” Not a Time Lord, hopefully, I add in my head. Literally anything but that.

The boy growls once more, showing his freakishly sharp and bloody fangs. “You are the meal that will replace my previous one…the one you robbed from me! I must drink your blood instead!”

Seriously?! I scoff to myself, thinking this is some sort of joke. Who is he; some guy with some crazy fantasy that he’s some sort of vampire?

“Uh, okay…” I chuckle out loud. “Not exactly what I exp—”

The unexpected thing happens in that very moment. I am suddenly shoved down hard to the wet ground and pinned by the boy, whose grip on me is incredibly strong; strong enough to break bone.

“What the hell are you doing?!” I scream at him as I struggle to fight him off of me. “What is wrong with you?! Get the hell off me!” At this point, I can see some clearer details in his facial features, which, strangely enough, seem to match Hazel’s new boyfriend’s.

Wait! Didn’t Billy say he had a brother?

“Hold still, little human,” the boy sniggers in my ear as he holds my head against the cold ground, exposing the left side of my neck. “You must pay for what you did, and you will pay in blood!” In that awful moment, with lightning-speed, he bends over and sinks his ‘vampire’ fangs into my neck, biting hard.

It’s impossible to prevent myself from screaming in agonizing pain as I feel him ripping my flesh apart and sucking my blood out of the wound. For a brief moment, I lose consciousness, but I manage to fight the crazy psycho off of me by kneeing him in the groin. The boy yelps in pain like an injured dog, and I swing my fist at his jaw and knock him down before I get back up on my feet and begin sprinting toward the exit of the park, clutching the side of my neck where he had bit me (More like mutilated me, as he had ripped off a large chunk of skin from my neck). My hand immediately gets soaked in sickly red-orange, as does the entire left side of my body, which feels numb with pain.

Frustratingly enough, I don’t run very far as the boy literally catches up with me and tackles me to the ground again, seeming much faster than the average human (and even Time Lord, apparently). I am honestly surprised at how fast and strong the boy genuinely is as he pins me down again. I scream at him again to get off, but he refuses and sniggers instead, showing his razer-sharp teeth again, which are now stained with orange.

“Don’t think you’ll be escaping me, little human,” he sneers. “Your blood is different from the others. Much different. It’s unlike any human blood I’ve ever tasted. It’s delicious. I need more.”

“Sorry…” I growl back at him, tucking my arms under him. “My blood isn’t for sale. It’s mine and mine only. Get off before I make you regret it! I don’t want to do this!” I press my hands against his chest, not just to try to push him off of me but also in preparation to use my Regeneration Energy to blast him away, now feeling like it’s the only choice I have to prevent myself from being legitimately killed.

“You won’t be escaping me again, little human,” he smirks and shakes his head. “I am much stronger than you. I am much faster than you. If you manage to escape again, I will catch you, and I will drain every ounce of blood from your body. You will never see the light of day again. You are weak.”

‘Little human’? Oh, you are so wrong on both counts, buddy!

“You’re wrong…” I grunt as I begin making my hands glow gold under his weight. “I’m not weak…” I then add with a triumphant smile as the boy suddenly notices my glowing hands and gasps in fright, “And, like you…I’m not human either!”

Without thinking, I use my Energy to blast the boy back several feet across the park. To my immense surprise, apparently, my Energy does more than just blast him away. The blast literally incinerates his body, much like what a nuclear blast would do when dropped on a city, literally turning him into a roasted corpse. The blast also sends a massive shockwave through the park, shaking the trees and shuddering nearby buildings and parked cars, even setting off the cars’ alarms all through the area.

Once I manage to reorient myself and get back on my feet, I gasp at what I had done, which was, apparently, the exact same thing I did in the Judoon Prison’s cafeteria, except this time it was the most intense as it’s ever been, and I had completely obliterated my attacker. I can’t help but instantly panic and run away back to the apartment, not looking back.

The instant I return to the apartment, I end up stumbling inside, barely keeping myself conscious as I fumble with the lock on the door, the key slipping from my bloody hands. I end up waking Hazel in my ruckus, who immediately runs out of her bedroom in her PJs and barefoot, wielding a long kitchen knife.

“Whoever you are, get the fuck out of my—” She pauses, seeing that it’s only me. “Oh, it’s just you. I thought you were—HOLY SHIT, NOVA; YOU’RE HURT! BADLY! WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?!”

“I was…” is as far as I get in my explanation before I lose all feeling in my mind, body, and soul, and everything instantly goes dark and silent before I even hit the floor.

Chapter Text

I wake to bright sunlight shining through the blinds of my bedroom window, as well as extreme aches in my entire body. Wincing as my eyes slowly adjust to the room, I glance around and am surprised to see Hazel sitting in a small chair at my bedside, looking concerned but relieved to see me awake.

"Nova?" she asks, leaning over to me. "Are you alright?" In all honesty, I am quite shocked to see her so worried for me, especially after our earlier argument.

"Hey, Haze..." I smile weakly at her as I turn my head toward her. "What—ah!" The slight motion triggers an intense stabbing sensation in the side of my neck. I automatically reach up with my hand and feel a thick bandage over the spot, and I also see several smaller bandages along both of my bare arms between by wrists and elbows.

At first, I am shocked to see the bandages, and I struggle to recall what gave me all those wounds, and then a few seconds later everything comes flooding back to me all at once:

The late-night walk I took...

The gut-wrenching scream I heard in the alleyway...

The strange 'vampire-boy' I saw attack the poor homeless woman in the alleyway...

The same 'vampire-boy' who attacked me in the park not long after...

Managing to stumble back into the apartment before everything went blank...

And then nothing after that. I guess I ended up passing out not long after I got back, most likely from exhaustion and blood-loss. Thank God I passed out after I arrived back at the apartment and not in the middle of a street somewhere in the city. God knows what would've happened if people saw a random unconscious, regenerating girl lying in the middle of the street; so many questions I would've been unable to answer, at least truthfully.

Before I have a chance to wonder if I had legitimately regenerated while I was unconscious (not that I feel like I actually have), Hazel speaks up, saying in a serious tone, "You went out late last night and came back covered in blood. It looked like someone had tried ripping your throat out from the side of your neck. Don't you remember?"

From the tone of her voice, she sounds like she doesn't know what actually happened. Of course not, since I had planned to keep that all a secret... Well, sort of, as I obviously hadn't expected that attack while I was on my walk, but now that I know of the attacks since I was warned about them from the police officers, now I feel as if I should keep everything a secret from Hazel as a way of protecting her from everything and wanting to be involved herself.

"Kinda..." I say before lying, "My brain's a little...fuzzy." Of course, it's not super fuzzy; I just don't want Hazel to know anything and have any part of it, knowing that it's my responsibility, and mine alone, to get to the bottom of this 'vampire' mystery—much like what Scooby-Doo and the Gang would do (rather, what just Fred Jones would do, minus Daphne, Velma, Shaggy and Scooby), except this time I am my own 'Scooby Gang.'

Suddenly feeling chilly, I look under my blanket to discover that, for some strange reason, I am not wearing any clothes, save for my underwear. I also discover that my pillowcase and bedsheets are slightly stained with orange-red blood along my left side. I glance back up at Hazel and ask, feeling slightly uncomfortable, "Um...where're my clothes?", thinking that she had stripped me of my clothing while I was passed out.

Seriously, what is it with people always stripping other people of their clothing while they're unconscious? That's so creepy and weird! I mean, I understand the need to do this in hospitals, but come on, it wouldn't kill someone to give a girl some warning beforehand! I mean, it wasn't so bad when Dad did it that one time I was unconscious for a few days after I'd used a large amount of Regeneration Energy to save him, but it was even creepier when those Reptilian-eyed 'Shadow Demons' did it to me after they'd kidnapped me and used my 'fear' to hunt down Dad in Victorian London; unfortunately, that's a memory I'll never forget.

"Sorry," Hazel says, her cheeks flushing red with embarrassment. "As I said, you were completely covered in blood, so after you passed out I stripped you from your clothes and threw them in the wash. I didn't think it was healthy for you to just keep your bloody clothes on. And besides, I needed to clean your wound, so I needed it to be exposed so I could clean it better. I swapped out your bandages twice. Looks like the one over your neck needs to be swapped out again." At this, she begins sifting through a First-Aid Kit on my bedside table for a clean bandage.

However, I feel the need to decline as I shake my head and slowly sit up while keeping the blanket covering my naked body, "No, it's okay. I can change it myself." Better yet, I can just use my Energy to heal it, I add in my head as I swing my legs over the side of my bed in an attempt to stand. Would be much easier and faster.

"Are you sure?" Hazel asks, still seeming concerned. "You're still very pale. Maybe you should...stay in bed."

And continue to let people die on the streets by psycho-vampires from another world? I scoff in my head in response. Absolutely no way that's happening!

"I'm fine, really," I insist as I legitimately stand, holding onto the footboard for support as my legs still feel like jelly. "I'll just use my Regen Energy." If I haven't already been using it, I add in my head. For all I know, my body could've been using it to heal itself on its own while I was comatose; could Hazel have witnessed this while she was at my side? Has she been sitting at my bedside the whole time, watching over me and protecting me while I was healing?

Did anybody else show up while I was out? My father? Billy? Could Hazel have asked her boyfriend to come over and help with taking care of me, possibly fearing that she couldn't do it by herself?

If she really had asked Billy over, could he have witnessed my Regeneration Energy too?

Before I have a chance to ask any of these questions, Hazel speaks up again, saying, "Um...I'm not sure that's a good idea either. When you talked about when you used your Energy, it sometimes could attract danger..."

"Haze, seriously, it's fine," I say, suddenly feeling the need to snap at her without really knowing why. "I'm fine. Please, just... Leave me be."

Hazel frowns, taken aback by my sudden outburst. "Fine," she snaps back, "I gotta go to Therapy anyway." She says the word 'therapy' with extreme hatred seemingly towards me, again blaming me for everything she went through in that dungeon as well as this entire year without me. She then gets up from the chair and begins leaving the room without looking at me. "The First-Aid Kit's there..." she says, pointing to the bedside table, "that is, if you need it. If not, then just...do whatever you want to do." At this, she slams the bedroom door behind her and rushes away angrily to prepare for her predestined therapy session.

As I hear Hazel leave the apartment, slamming that door on her way out as well, I can't help but groan loudly to myself, instantly feeling guilty and ashamed to have snapped at her the way I did, knowing that she was only trying to help, possibly in an attempt to forgive me and rekindle our friendship between each other. I feel awful to have pushed her away so harshly. In all honesty, deep down, I still feel quite angry with Hazel for starting the argument we had before (or perhaps I may have started it myself?), while at the same time I feel obligated to keep her out of what happened during the 'vampire' attack.

While I feel like I have an obligation to investigate and stop these 'vampire' attacks—whatever they really are—I also want to keep Hazel out of the way to keep her safe from the attackers. I feel that if she learns that I am secretly investigating them, of course she would want to help, but I refuse to let her help me this time, knowing that her helping me find my parents had gotten her in serious danger with the Silence, and I certainly don't want a repeat of that, especially since I feel so ashamed that she has to go through therapy to overcome those fears and nightmares of what she experienced in that damn dungeon because of me.

From now on, I'm doing this alone. Nobody else will die because of my mistakes, certainly not Hazel. Never again.

After glancing at my bedside clock, I discover that, to my great relief, I haven't been unconscious for very long—thankfully, only for about fifteen hours. Thank God, as I've never been truly unconscious for less than a couple of days (It must be another Time Lord curse, or something; that, or I'm just incredibly unlucky). Despite wanting to be truly human and steer clear from using any of my Time Lord abilities (or anything Time Lord, really), I decide to use my Regeneration Energy anyway to heal all the injuries I'd sustained from the 'vampire' attack; of course, I do this in the bathroom away from prying eyes just in case anyone decides to snoop (not that anyone would, as nobody else lives here except me and Hazel). After that, I take a nice hot shower, washing away the excess blood and grime from my body. After my shower, I spend the rest of the afternoon enrolling for my college classes (unfortunately I have to enroll for Freshmen classes as, technically, I'd missed three semesters and am, therefore, still considered a Freshman) and early evening browsing the Internet for the latest current events I'd missed over the last year.

Before browsing the Internet, while Hazel is still out at her therapy session, I search the kitchen for anything sugary, as my Blood Sugar still feels a bit too low than where it really should be. Sadly, I can't find any Fish-Fingers-and-Custard makings (Bummer! Oh well; I'll stop by the grocery store some other day), so I eat a pack of Jammie Dodgers instead; it's cool that Hazel has a liking to the cookies as well.

Of course, after being told about the so-called 'citywide curfew' last night, that's the very first thing I research. I find several news articles about various attacks all over the city, which started about six months ago, ironically around the same time that Billy and his family moved to London from Blackpool (or so he claimed). Strangely, the articles say that the people who were attacked were attacked by either a teenaged boy (rather, two teenaged boys who looked a lot alike) or a middle-aged woman who would restrain the victim, sink their sharp fangs into some exposed limb, and suck the blood out of the person's body, almost killing the person doing so. The people who survived or witnessed the event and managed to escape had made similar descriptions, but there were several victims who died from blood-loss or had been found completely drained of blood. Several of the article writers believed that "the city could be invaded by vampires," and that they warn people to be careful when wandering the city at night, just as the police officers had done to me. There is even an article that claims that a secret military group called U.N.I.T. had put the curfew in place, and they hired the police to enforce the curfews until the 'vampire' issue is resolved for good.

After reading these articles, I think about asking Hazel about the events to see if she's aware of these things happening or if she was a victim or witness herself, but I decide against it a few seconds later, still feeling adamant about keeping her out of the loop, especially if I am, indeed, the only one responsible for ending these attacks once and for all. Of course, I'd have to wait 'til after sunset to begin my investigations, especially since they are known to happen more often after dark.

Of course! Vampires—if they really are vampires—can't stand sunlight, so that makes perfect sense!

While I wait (super impatiently) for the Sun to set, I research other major events that happened while I was off on my travels, and there are two that capture my attention. The first is that, apparently, there was a brief Cyberman invasion across the globe, but sadly, I couldn't find any info on what exactly happened, or why they seemingly chose to leave of their own accord after a while of wreaking havoc all over the planet.

Frustratingly enough, I couldn't find much info on the second thing either, other than yet another alien invasion, this time of Zygons; however, there was a Treaty in place where the Zygons could live peacefully among humans (which, apparently, started back in 2013 and is still around to this day), but a small faction of Zygons broke that peace in the small town of Turmezistan back in 2015 (perhaps when I was with Dad while trying to save my guardians), and a small war broke out there. Other than those two, those are the only major events I missed over the last couple of years while I was traveling.

Later that evening, after the Sun finally sets and after Hazel goes to bed, I decide to sneak out of the apartment again, this time out of my bedroom window to avoid any suspicions. I figure if Hazel were to hear or catch me sneaking out the front door, of course she'd want to know where I'm going and insist on coming with me, but, as I've already planned, I don't want her involved in anything else that might be dangerous, so I make sure to sneak out another way that she won't suspect me leaving at all; perhaps if she hears me opening my window, she'd think I'm simply opening it to let in some fresh air (which isn't true, of course).

Of course, this time I am fully aware of the curfew after having been told about it the previous night, and I, of course, legitimately ignore it this time, believing that I have a responsibility to investigate these 'vampire' attacks despite what the police officers said. I quietly climb out of my bedroom window and leave the apartment complex, this time making sure to keep to the shadows to avoid the police, knowing that I am legitimately breaking the law by deliberately ignoring the curfew. I purposefully dress in all black to blend in better with the darkness.

I decide to begin my investigation by returning to the scene of the crime—i.e. the park where I was attacked the previous night—and use my sonic screwdriver to scan for signs and traces of alien life that was present over the last twenty-four hours (yes, I know I said I wasn't planning to do anything Time-Lordy while I was back home, but desperate times call for desperate measures). At the exact spot where I was attacked, there are still small traces of my blood left over, but thankfully most of it was washed away by the rain.

In all honesty, I am shocked to see the roasted corpse of the vampire-boy is completely missing from the scene. Then again, the police or U.N.I.T. may have taken away the body to research from it and discover what happened. When I was researching the latest current events on the computer, I was surprised to not find any reports of the attack here in the park earlier in the day, as I had researched it out of curiosity (as well as in slight concern for someone having witnessed what I did), but thankfully I found nothing. Perhaps, if the police or U.N.I.T. had, indeed, found the body and took it away, they decided to keep it a secret from the public until they pinpointed who killed the boy. The very thought sends a wave of shudders down my spine, making me worry what would happen if the police or U.N.I.T. discovered that I was responsible and what they would do for my punishment as well as discovering my being Time Lord. Perhaps, if U.N.I.T. discovered me, they wouldn't punish me too much, as I remember my father telling me stories about working with U.N.I.T. for a while and becoming close friends with their boss way back when, so perhaps they'll let me off the hook once they discover I'm his daughter.

The very thought also makes me wonder whether killing that boy was a true accident or not. Of course, I didn't actually mean to kill him...or perhaps I did. The guy was trying to kill me, and I acted in self-defense; I just didn't expect to have defended myself in that way, just like at the Judoon Prison Cafeteria. Admittedly, this was the first time I had legitimately roasted someone like a marshmallow (of course, without really meaning to), and clearly my powers are becoming more powerful by the day. Jack's words suddenly ring in my mind at the thought: "You don't seem to understand how truly powerful you are. If you don't learn to control your powers, bad things will happen; really bad things. Don't think of what I'm telling you as a threat; I am trying to warn you, because as I said, I care about you, and I worry about you. What might happen if you don't learn to control your Deviancy... I just don't want you to end up doing something you'll regret." Of course, a small part of me regrets incinerating that boy, but at the same time I'm not entirely sure if doing so was truly the right thing. Did that boy really deserve it? Could I have saved millions by doing what I did?

Of course, there is still at least one more 'vampire' to eliminate—whoever the 'middle-aged woman' is, who could very likely be his mother. If she found out I'd killed her son...

Her son who looked strikingly similar to Hazel's boyfriend... Could they have been related? I mean, Billy did say he had a brother and moved here with him and his mother...

Billy can't be a 'vampire' too...could he?

I snort at the thought, the idea of my best friend dating a vampire (or even a Zygon, for that matter) sounding downright ludicrous. Then again, it's not totally out of the question, what with the number of aliens secretly living among us over the centuries (of course, I would know, as I'm obviously one of them).

Thankfully, my screwdriver picks up a small reading of alien DNA in the area (most likely from the burnt corpse of the vampire-kid), and when I change the settings to widen the search across the city—much like when I used the sonic to trace where the portal to the Shadow Demons' ship was located in the Victorian London sewers—the sonic begins softly beeping, now acting as a compass to lead me to the body's present location...or perhaps where there are other 'vampires' hidden in the city.

Several minutes later, I follow the signal to an abandoned building in the outskirts of Downtown. Oh, of course! I scoff to myself as I cautiously enter the seemingly-slowly-collapsing building. Because these types of places are where everyone does their super-secret dirty business. Just like in every typical drug-dealing scene ever.

However, the moment I enter the structure, I immediately get a faint sense of there being another of my own kind in the area. Odd... Could my father be here? Or my mother?

However, what's even more odd, as I wander deeper into the dark and musty building, is that the sense isn't of my father, nor my mother. I know, because whenever they're around, I get a unique sense from each of them (my father's being much stronger than my mother's), but this one is different and yet still oddly familiar at the same time, like we're biologically part of the same family, which is weird because as far as I know I'm an only child...at least, I'm pretty sure I am.

The Doctor and River didn't have another child before (or after) me...did they? Surely, I would know if I had a brother or sister somewhere out there; I'd be able to sense them too, right? My parents would've told me if I did have a Time Lord brother or sister somewhere out there...

Right?

So how come I'm getting that sense now? That, perhaps, they've lied to me? They wouldn't...would they?

My thoughts are interrupted when I suddenly round the corner and see a petite mid-twenty-year-old girl bending over a dead corpse, and I instantly pause and duck behind the corner, out of sight of the girl who is, thankfully, facing the opposite direction, her blonde hair tied in a long ponytail flowing down her back. I watch the girl as she inspects the body of another homeless man, and I can't help but wonder if she is one of the 'vampires' who'd killed this poor man, having drained him of his blood, or, like me, if she's simply here to investigate what happened.

My suspicions are geared toward the latter as the girl sighs to herself. "You poor chap," she says in a British accent, seeming to feel genuine sadness for the man. "If only I'd come sooner... Don't worry, I'll avenge you by finding the people who did this to you. Somehow, I feel like it's my responsibility to do that. It's my responsibility to stop all of this, and I will."

Odd... That's exactly what I came here for. How is it that we both seem to have the exact same goal? That's so wei—

"That's a promis—"

Both the girl's declaration and my thoughts are interrupted when a familiar male voice speaks up from the shadows across the room, "Who are you? What are you doing here?"

My hearts immediately drop in horror when none other than Hazel's boyfriend (or should I say 'traitor') Billy emerges from another room along the far wall, his clothes covered head-to-toe in blood. I am even more shocked when I see another familiar slightly older boy accompany him, also covered in blood, that being the same kid who attacked me last night at the park; and while they're standing next to each other, I can clearly see their resemblance to one another.

Holy shit! How is that guy still alive?! That's impossible; I incinerated him! No-one should be able to survive that, and yet somehow he did, and without even a scratch! How?!

And Billy... That traitor! How could he?! How could he betray Hazel?! If she were here seeing this—see that she's dating a bloodsucking psychopath...

"Oh! Uh, sorry!" the blonde girl sputters in panic, immediately standing up from the corpse. "I didn't mean to trespass! I was just... Listen, this isn't what it looks like! I didn't kill this guy! I was—"

"What are you doing here?" the older boy repeats his younger brother's question. "You shouldn't be here."

"Well," the girl shrugs, "in all honesty, I get the feeling like you two shouldn't be here either... Am I right?" She adds, glaring suspiciously at the boys as if they were the ones who killed the poor homeless guy. However, the boys just stare back at her in a 'So what if we did?' manner. "What happened to this poor chap, do you think?" the girl continues with an accusatory voice. "You didn't happen to catch who killed him, did you? Seeing as you're...here and all..." At this point, she pauses, seeing the way Billy's brother looks her up and down like she's a piece of meat, which clearly makes her uncomfortable.

As if things aren't unsettling enough for the girl, Billy's brother inhales deeply and says with a twisted smirk, "Your blood... It smells...familiar. Like the blood I tasted last night..."

"'The blood you tasted last night'?" Billy frowns, glancing in confusion toward the blonde girl. "You think she's also a T—?"

"I must have another taste!" his brother suddenly exclaims, his eyes blazing with manic energy, stepping forward toward her in preparation to attack, baring his sharp vampire fangs.

"Whoa, hang on, Brody," Billy says, grabbing his brother's shoulder and pulling him back. "You drained most of this guy's blood, and I hardly got a drop. Besides, I don't have the same power that you do now." He then glances toward the blonde girl, his eyes becoming just as menacing as he shows his own vampire fangs in place of his regular teeth (So... They really are vampires. Who knew?). "Let me get a taste of hers!"

"Okay..." the girl says as she slowly backs away from the pair. "Normally I try to avoid confrontations as much as possible, but sometimes if I need to, I will not hesitate to resort to violence. Trust me, boys—that is, if you really are boys—you don't know what you're dealing with here. You're making a big mistake if you think you're gonna win this fight, coz I can promise you, you won't. I'm a born and bred soldier, so you don't wanna mess with me."

"Two against one?" Billy chuckles and shrugs at the odds.

"We'll see about that," his brother adds his own chuckle as they nod at each other in seeming confirmation before suddenly charging at the girl in the blink of an eye.

I watch as the two boys instantly attack the girl, but, surprisingly, she is much too quick for them. I notice that the boys seem to appear and disappear from view, almost like they're teleporting in and out of existence, but they are, in fact, so fast that it only appears that way to the naked eye. Despite this, somehow the girl seems to time her attacks perfectly, somehow knowing when one of them would appear and immediately punch or kick them before they know what's coming. I think about helping, evening out the odds, but it's quickly becoming apparent that the girl can handle herself just fine, her precision with her swings being spot-on, which, admittedly, greatly impresses me and makes me even a little envious toward her; clearly she had great Aikido instructors growing up, which greatly seems to rival my own (Surely, she wasn't trained by the Silence, was she?). Instead of helping her, I bring out my cellphone and take a video recording of the girl as she takes down the boys with ease, planning to use the video as proof to show Hazel that her boyfriend is, indeed, a serial killer, as well as keeping it to find out more about this mysterious kick-ass blonde girl. Mere seconds into recording, the fight ends with both boys lying unconscious around the girl's feet.

"I told you, you two wouldn't win this fight," the girl pants and sighs in satisfaction as she looks down on the boys' unconscious forms. "I swear, you dimwits never listen. Nobody ever listens. S'pose I have one of those faces." She says that last bit with disappointment and slight annoyance, and I can't help but chuckle, always thinking the exact same thing. It must be a Time Lord thing; that, or it's just a 'woman' thi—

Unfortunately, and quite unexpectedly, my chuckle ends up being a little too loud as the blonde girl suddenly gasps and looks toward me, evidently seeing me recording her, and immediately flees from the scene.

"Wait!" I call out to the girl as I swiftly put my phone away and begin running after her. "I didn't mean to scare you! Come back! I want to talk to you!"

However, the girl ignores me as she keeps running. Once we exit the building and onto the main streets, I continue chasing her 'til she is lost from my sight, and apparently, I end up being unable to keep up with her, as she is much too fast even for such a petite woman, and at the same time that familiar sense of there being another Time Lord gradually disappears as well. "Fudgeknuckle!" I curse at myself for giving away my hiding place and losing the girl in the process; who knows where she'd run off to, or even who she was. So many questions I hoped to ask her...

Since I can't run after the girl, not knowing where she'd run off to, I decide to return to the abandoned building and confront the two boys, hoping to get some answers from them. From Billy, why he's betraying Hazel by pretending to be her boyfriend and appears to be on a murder-spree behind her back; and from his brother, how the hell he had survived my attack on him and how he's completely without a scratch as if he'd somehow healed himself; I mean, no human being could've survived that...

Unless he's somehow not human, and nor is Billy...

However, once I return, I find them, as well as the dead body of the homeless man, completely gone, save for the massive bloodstain from the man's corpse.

Reluctantly accepting defeat, I decide to return to the apartment, bringing yet more unanswered questions with me:

Who was that blonde girl? Why was she there? What led her there in the first place? How was she strong enough—apparently, even way stronger than me—to take down Billy and his brother with such ease and win without a scratch? Why did I sense that she was another Time Lord?

Moreover, who and what were Billy and his brother? Clearly, they weren't human, judging by their inhuman super-speed and strength (then again, the same could be said for the girl) and the way they could sprout vampire fangs in place of their human teeth at will, as if they are true vampires. Could they be true vampires? Judging by this evidence, as well as the video I caught on my phone, I'm willing to bet that they are.

What is the point of Billy pretending to be Hazel's boyfriend? Could the reason be to get close to me, knowing that Hazel is best friends with me and, by extension, with a Time Lord? Could he and his family be looking to take advantage of a Time Lord's (i.e. my) powers and steal them for themselves?

How much, if anything, does Hazel know about his 'nightly routine' and his so-called 'skin condition'? Should I even tell her the truth about him and the possible fact that he could, indeed, be some kind of vampire? What would happen if Billy found out I found out his secret? What would he do if he found out I told Hazel his secret?

But the biggest question of all is: how the hell did Billy's brother survive? Absolutely no way could anyone have survived after being incinerated like he was. What could possibly have nursed him back to full health with barely a scar present?

Unfortunately, I am left with yet another sleepless night as I struggle to find the answers to these questions, which, I have a feeling, won't be answered for a really long time.

Chapter Text

While she patiently waits her turn to see the university’s psychiatrist and therapist, Dr. Barbara Chapman, for what feels like the millionth time since her first session, Hazel thinks back on her previous sessions, particularly (and strangely) the ones about Nova. She finds the fact that the therapist often wants to talk more about Nova and less about Hazel a little off-putting, believing this behavior to be super suspicious and strange, and it often makes her wonder why the doctor is so interested in Nova and seemed so anxious for her to return, same with Billy, her therapist’s apparent son.

Thinking about Billy, this behavior from him and his mother partially makes Hazel feel a little jealous of Nova, making her wonder why everyone seems so interested in her former best friend and less about Hazel herself. She had asked Billy several times about why he talks so much about her and had explained how he’s making Hazel feel every time he did, but Billy always shrugged it off as simply being ‘interested in learning more’ about her childhood friend, but Hazel doesn’t always believe him when he says such things and feels more suspicious of him, thinking he’s hiding an even darker truth, but Hazel hasn’t been able to bring up the courage to ask about the ‘dark truth’ of his immense infatuation with Nova. A small part of Hazel is slightly concerned that it might be a so-called ‘Time Lord thing’ and partially worries for Nova’s safety, and now that Nova is finally home after all this time, she is indecisive as to whether or not to tell Nova about Billy’s obsessive behavior and infatuation with her. Then again, Nova may already be aware of this odd behavior since he came over yesterday to meet her, seeing how vastly uncomfortable she felt while talking to him when he asked too many personal questions about why she’s been gone so long and where (and when) she’s been in all that time (even when Hazel herself was struggling to come up with believable lies to back up Nova’s ‘stories’), and a part of Hazel wonders if maybe Nova is right to not trust Billy, and even wonders if maybe she should feel the same about her therapist who’s also been asking too many personal questions about Nova. Perhaps there was an even bigger reason why Billy and his family moved to London from Blackpool several months ago; could it have something to do with Nova and her non-human parents?

Now that Nova has been home for an entire day, Hazel still doesn’t know how to feel about her return. As happy as she should feel for Nova to finally be back on Earth soil (at least in the Present Day, what with Nova being an apparent avid time-traveler now), at the same time Hazel feels slightly uncomfortable for her to be back, as she can’t help but see her former childhood friend as almost a complete stranger, especially after everything she was taught by the impossible enigma that is her apparent biological father, the Doctor, and her entire personality seeming to change as a result from all those experiences off-world. Of course, Hazel is quite familiar with the phrase, “experiences are what shape a person,” but she didn’t expect Nova to change this much since her return, despite her looking the exact same as when she initially left.

Suddenly thinking back on their earlier argument, Hazel begins to think that she may have been a bit too harsh toward Nova, constantly blaming her for everything Hazel went through with the Silence, and it hadn’t occurred to her until just now that Nova could very well have been blaming herself just as much as Hazel has toward her, if not more so, for a very long time, ever since that dreadful day. Feeling slightly ashamed, Hazel wants to figure out a better way to make amends with her former ‘sister’ and rekindle their friendship with one another, but she has struggled with this, feeling discouraged about Nova’s new behavior, as Nova now seems to be pushing Hazel away and excluding her from everything she does, which is a behavior that seems very uncharacteristic of Nova, at least to Hazel. Of course, this behavior may just be a result from her experiences with her father, Hazel tells herself; perhaps they had lived through some rough times while on their travels together. Still, it is very unlike Nova’s typical behavior—at least, how she acted in the past, long before she reunited with her bio-parents. Then again, it could also be a result from Nova’s so-called ‘Regeneration,’ as she and her father had once mentioned to Hazel that a Time Lord’s personality can change along with their physical bodies, as bizarre as that concept still is to Hazel, even after she had witnessed it firsthand two years prior. Hazel hates to admit it to herself, but perhaps this exact behavior is, indeed, a sign that her former best friend has “moved on,” just as Dr. Chapman had predicted months previously.

Thinking back on that exact (and, at the time, totally absurd) conversation with her therapist, Hazel’s mind is suddenly transported back in time to that exact moment.

“So, tell me more about your friend Nova,” Dr. Chapman asked Hazel seemingly out of the blue that day. “It sounds like you girls were really close back in the day.”

“We were,” Hazel nodded wearily. “She was like a sister to me. We did everything together; there were never any secrets between us.” She decided to make Nova’s secret about her not being human an exception, knowing why she kept that secret for so long before she finally revealed it the day of the attack at the arcade back in High School, when Nova used her magical golden energy to heal her after being shot by that alien.

“Are you two still close now, despite her being physically absent from your life?”

Hazel paused, a little unsure of how to answer her therapist’s question. “I…honestly don’t know. Before this year, I would get updates from her from time to time about her travels with her dad, and whenever I texted her back, she wouldn’t respond for months. Several months back was the last time I got a text from her. She said she’d come back home later in the day from my point of view, and I waited for her… But she never showed, not even the next day, or the day after that, or the next week, and so on. She’d completely ghosted me for some reason, and I never found out why. I still don’t know why. I’ve been texting and calling her every day since then, and I’ve never gotten a single answer from her. It’s been a little over a year now since I last saw her, and about six months since she ghosted me.”

It still hurt Hazel to think about it, and it seemed to hurt even more as she talked about it out loud. Why would Nova do such a thing? she wondered to herself. It just wasn’t like her to suddenly stop replying to Hazel’s texts completely without warning. Hazel worried that something may have happened to Nova and her dad while on one of their travels, but she couldn’t imagine Nova simply choosing to never reply to her again. At least, that was what Hazel believed; she just hoped that whatever may have happened to her former best friend wasn’t anything that may have ended up costing her friend her life.

“Have you still been texting and calling her, hoping she’d eventually respond?”

“No,” Hazel shook her head in slight shame. “I stopped about a month ago. Honestly, what’s the point in continuing to call and text someone who’s completely stopped answering, and probably never will again for all I know?”

“You think something bad may have happened to her and her family?” Dr. Chapman asked curiously. “Perhaps that’s the reason why she’s stopped replying…at least temporarily.”

“Maybe?” Hazel shrugged uncertainly. “That, or she’s moved on. Even if she had moved on, surely she would’ve told me. Why hasn’t she told me?”

Even though it was meant to be a rhetorical question, the doctor shook her head and answered in a sad tone, “I don’t know. Perhaps because she isn’t ready. Sometimes it takes a while for someone to feel the courage to share the truth, especially if that truth is hard to accept. Perhaps if you gave her more time to respond, you’ll see that she still cares; it’s just taking her a bit more time to respond this time round. Perhaps she’s still struggling to get accustomed to her new life with her family, just as it is for you to be accustomed to being away from her for this long. I’m sure she’ll respond soon, but it would have to be in her own time. Just be patient.”

“I’ve been patient enough,” Hazel growled in anger and rolled her eyes. “At this point I doubt she’ll ever come home.”

Seeming to sense Hazel’s frustration toward her ‘former best friend’ for abandoning her, as well as her friend being the reason for Hazel having to unwillingly attend these sessions in the first place, Dr. Chapman sighed and suggested calmly, “Let’s talk about something else for a bit. Tell me more about your nightmares.” During Hazel’s first session with the doctor, she had told her all about her nightmares of everything she experienced in that dark and dank dungeon, the tortures she went through at the Silence’s mercy (or severe lack thereof), and her fear of the murderous psychopaths coming back for Hazel one day. “From the way you vividly described the nightmares—rather, the same nightmare—it sounds like you’re reliving a past event that has clearly traumatized you when you were younger. Am I correct in assuming that?”

“You’re partially correct,” Hazel admitted somewhat uncomfortably. “It wasn’t something that happened to me when I was younger; it actually happened a lot more recently. About a year and a half ago.”

“Ah, now that makes sense,” the doctor nodded. “You’re clearly going through PTSD from what you experienced in that dungeon. Those memories have affected you so much that you’re afraid of the same events happening to you again even in real life. You can’t stop thinking about them, so that’s why you have recurring nightmares about them.”

“And with Nova being gone, that’s not helping either,” Hazel added. “If she was here right now, I wouldn’t have to be dealing with all these nightmares and fears of all that stuff happening again, knowing that she’ll protect me from them if they do decide to come back for us.” She paused as anger overwhelmed her yet again. “If she hadn’t insisted on splitting up in that alley that day, I would never have been captured and sent to that damn dungeon in the first place!” A small part of her still hadn’t entirely forgiven Nova for making that choice.

“Is that so?” Dr. Chapman nodded with a raised eyebrow. “You seem to see your friend as a sort of protector, but at the same time you seem to blame her for what’s happened to you? Forgive me, but I can’t seem to understand why you think this way about her. Would you mind elaborating further on that, please? From my understanding, your friend sounds a bit…reckless, putting you in all that danger, whether it was intentional or otherwise. Is this normal behavior for her; has she always been like that, even in childhood?”

“Kinda,” Hazel shrugged. “I mean…Nova and I have been through a couple of dangerous situations together in the past, but she’s protected me from harm’s way…mostly.”

“‘Mostly?’ What do you mean by that?”

Hazel paused for a moment, unsure if she should explain to her therapist, even when she still hadn’t known her therapist that long up to that point, but she decided to explain anyway. “Well…there were moments when she’d tell me to stay put where I am, but the places I’d stay put were not always the safest places. There were times she’d run off to investigate something on her own and I would stay behind where it was safer…at least where she thought was safer. But suddenly the danger we’d be dealing with would somehow find me, and during that time I would be alone…at least until Nova would come back to rescue me, usually at the literal last second. Both times, I thought I was going to die, but the second time was worse since we were miles away from each other at that point.” She would never forget the fear she felt at that time when Nova insisted on them separating from each other in the alley to get away from the Silence, not knowing that the Silence were after Hazel as well, and how powerless she felt upon her initial capture when Nova failed to appear to save her.

“Would you mind explaining, in a bit more detail, the two times you almost died because of your friend?” her therapist suggested gently.

“Well, she didn’t purposefully almost get me killed both times. She would never do that. It just sort of…happened that way. She couldn’t have known…” Hazel paused, suddenly feeling unsure as to whether or not Nova had truly not been aware of the danger she was putting Hazel through during both events, especially in the alley.

“I’m sure you’re right about that, dear, but I would like to hear both stories anyway, if you don’t mind sharing them.”

Hazel sighed before telling her stories. “Well…the first time was at our local arcade. We were playing Laser-Tag with a few other friends when this ‘thing’ appeared and interrupted our game. It was some kind of alien; Nova called it a ‘Sontran,’ or something like that. Anyway, when it attacked, Nova asked me to stay and hide while she ran off to find out what was going on. Eventually, the alien found me and shot me in the arm, but it thankfully didn’t kill me, though it almost did. The alien was looking for Nov—uh, someone specific and was demanding to know where the person was, but I didn’t know, but he didn’t believe me. Right before I thought for sure the alien was going to kill me for the hell of it, Nova appeared at the last second and knocked him out, and if she’d been a second late I would have died. Though I’m pretty sure when the alien shot me the first time, he was shooting to kill but had thankfully missed his shot by shooting me in the arm instead.”

“My, that is frightening,” Dr. Chapman nodded, her eyes bulging in genuine shock. “You’re lucky she saved you in time.”

“Yeah, but she didn’t need to leave me all alone,” Hazel pointed out. “She could’ve asked me to go back to the car or something; I don’t know why she didn’t and insisted on dealing with the alien instead.”

“Yes, that did seem like a very reckless decision on her part,” the doctor agreed before urging Hazel to share her second story. “Go on.”

“Anyway, the second time was much worse. When we first came to London, we were spending the day sightseeing like normal tourists when we eventually started being stalked by a very creepy group of people who were after us—rather, just Nova, since she initially believed they were only after her, but she was wrong. As a way of confusing the scary group, Nova suggested that we split up, again thinking they were only after her and not me; I said ‘no,’ but she insisted we do it anyway, and we did. But like I said, she was wrong, as the group was after both of us. They chased me all over the city and eventually caught up with me, and they captured me and sent me to that damn dungeon, along with Nova’s guardians whom they also captured as bait to capture Nova. Apparently these people were Nova’s bio-parents’ enemies, and they were after Nova, planning to train her as an assassin to kill them, particularly her dad. Those sickos kept us locked up in that dungeon for over a week until Nova’s bio-parents’ friends eventually busted us out and we all escaped. Well, most of us escaped; her guardians didn’t make it, but that wasn’t Nova’s fault. In fact, Nova almost died too, but thankfully she regen—uh, she healed and recovered.” Thinking back on that specific event, Hazel was relieved when she discovered that Nova’s guardians were captured as well; at least Hazel wasn’t completely alone like she feared to have been at the time she was initially captured, even if she had preferred that she had been captured with her own parents.

“Hmm… So, Nova’s decision to ‘split up’ was what started all of this?” the doctor surmised. “She hoped that by you two going in different directions, that would confuse the group; and even though you were against the idea, she ignored you and insisted that you go through with it anyway?”

“Yeah,” Hazel shrugged like there was absolutely nothing wrong with that decision (at least at the time it was made), even though it turned out that there was everything wrong with that decision, hence why Hazel was sitting in this very room and having this very conversation. “But I trusted her. I trusted that her plan would work out, since her plans almost always work since she’s, like, a super-genius like Einstein. But she didn’t know that those creeps would be after me too. I don’t think there was a way that she could have known; I mean I certainly didn’t. She thought she was doing the right thing, and I believed her…at least at the time.”

“And yet her decision—a decision that which you also ultimately agreed to, despite being against it the first time—put your life in serious jeopardy, as was her decision to make you stay put at the arcade. If she had listened to you or had suggested something different, you would never have been captured and sent to that dungeon, nor would you have been shot by that creature.”

“And I wouldn’t have to come see you every week,” Hazel added before pausing in embarrassment. “Uh, no offense.”

“None taken, dear,” the doctor shook her head. “From my understanding, if it weren’t for your friend’s reckless behavior, you would not be going through this much PTSD in your life. From the stories you shared with me, it sounds like your friend isn’t, and has more than likely never been, truly aware of the danger she’s put you through; she’s not entirely safe to be around. Perhaps, if she were to come home sometime soon, it might be a good idea for you to sit down with her and discuss this with her; perhaps then she’d wake up and change her ways.” She paused for a few seconds before adding slowly, “Or…there’s the option of you two perhaps…going your separate ways for a little while. Perhaps then you could forget your trauma and move on.”

“We go our separate ways?” Hazel frowned, astounded that her therapist would suggest something so ludicrous. “I can’t ask her to do that.” After everything they went through together, she couldn’t imagine having that conversation with Nova and asking her to leave indefinitely, especially after all the times Nova had saved her life despite her making all those reckless decisions in order to do so.

“She left you of her own free will to travel with her dad for several months, did she not?” Dr. Chapman pointed out.

Hazel shrugged. “Yeah, but that’s a fam—”

“And then she dropped contact with you and hasn’t checked up in just as long, if not longer,” the doctor added, speaking over Hazel like her excuse for her friend’s decision to leave was irrelevant. “Who’s to say she may have moved on herself? Perhaps it’s time for you to accept that possibility. Perhaps it’s time for you to let her go.”

Hazel remembered feeling greatly offended after that conversation. She remembered arguing with her therapist that she refused to ask Nova to part ways because she would be a horrible friend for suggesting something like that, especially if by some chance—a chance that, of course, never happened, at least back then—that Nova returned the next day. Hazel couldn’t stand the possibility of demanding Nova that she leave right after she’s returned months later. She especially couldn’t stand the possibility of asking this after they had been best friends for as long as Hazel could remember. Hazel remembered requesting that she and Dr. Chapman cut their session short, since Hazel refused to talk about the topic further (or really ever again), even though the doctor had requested that they continue seeing each other, but to talk about the nightmares instead; though they still talked about Nova on occasion, especially during later sessions.

Back in the present moment, even after Nova’s long-awaited return, Hazel is still highly against the idea of asking Nova to leave again and “go their separate ways.” Of course, she is aware of how much their lives (especially Nova’s) have changed, but Hazel still doesn’t want to make the idea of banning Nova from her life forever a reality, no matter how much danger she puts Hazel in, whether by accident or otherwise. She thinks it would be especially horrible to ask Nova to leave even after she’s been home not even a full day, and while Nova is still recovering from her mystery excursion late last night.

Thinking back on what happened last night, Hazel wonders where and how Nova got those injuries, and wonders what could’ve happened differently if Hazel was there as well. She wonders if, perhaps, she could’ve prevented Nova from getting hurt, especially since whatever happened to her had almost killed her if not for her otherworldly healing powers. Whatever happened, it clearly traumatized Nova so much that she refused to talk about it, and, perhaps, she didn’t want Hazel finding out for fear of the same fate happening to her. In other words, Nova refused to say anything as a way of protecting Hazel, but from wha—

“Hazel dear? Are you alright?”

“What?” Hazel jumps in her seat, startled at the unexpected sound of Dr. Chapman’s voice, who had just come out of her office to fetch her, but of course Hazel hadn’t been paying attention.

“Are you alright?” the doctor repeats, looking slightly concerned. “You looked… stuck in the past for a moment.”

“I’m fine,” Hazel shakes her head. “I’m just…tired.” This last bit is a lie, of course…well, more of a half-lie. She does, indeed, feel tired after having experienced that rude awakening from Nova crashing into the apartment well after curfew and then passing out immediately thereafter; and then Hazel had to stay up the rest of the night and all of the next morning taking care of her ‘sick’ friend while she recovered from whatever the hell she went through after an immense struggle to carry her deadweight back to her room.

Hazel remembered her time watching over Nova to be a very surreal experience. Even while Nova was unconscious, there were numerous times when even in broad daylight Hazel could see that freaky golden glow lightly pulsing from her friend’s body, which she even exhaled from her mouth every once in a while. There were even times when Hazel focused hard enough, she could physically see the cuts and bruises slowly knit themselves back together and disappear, much like how her own arm looked when Nova healed it that day after the ‘arcade’ incident. Even while unconscious, Hazel was astounded by how Nova could still somehow control her energy to that extent while in that state; then again, there was still a lot about Time Lord Physiology that Hazel—and maybe even Nova herself—never really understood or even thought possible, and it still freaked Hazel out to this day.

The therapist looks at Hazel like she knows her claim about being ‘tired’ to be a lie, but she doesn’t say anything about it besides, “Come on in; make yourself comfortable,” as she beckons Hazel inside her office. Hazel enters the office without question and seats herself on the sofa like she’s done a million times before. “So…” Dr. Chapman says as she hands Hazel a glass of water and seats herself in the lounge chair across from her with her clipboard in hand, ready to take notes like always. “Anything new to report since our last meeting? How’s my son been treating you?”

“Good,” Hazel shrugs, not in the mood to talk about him especially since Nova’s return. She still thought of Nova’s reaction toward Billy when they first met to be quite strange, and she thought his immense eagerness to see her again earlier this morning to be especially unsettling, especially when he had deliberately forced himself into her apartment against her consent.

At the time, Hazel was sitting by Nova’s side, anxiously waiting for her to wake up, when she heard an aggressive-sounding knock at the door, and Hazel instantly panicked, thinking the Silence had legitimately come back for them after somehow discovering Nova’s return, but thankfully it turned out to be Billy instead, much to Hazel’s great relief. However, instead of waiting for Hazel’s permission to enter her space, Billy simply pushed his way past her and immediately went toward Nova’s bedroom, who was seen still passed out (while, at the same time, looking like a human glowstick) in her bed; and when Hazel noticed this, she immediately chastised herself for leaving Nova’s bedroom door open before she answered the apartment door and rushed to stop Billy from entering the bedroom and discovering the unnatural phenomenon that was happening inside. Thankfully Hazel pushed herself in front of her boyfriend and managed to close the door before he saw what was going on (at least, she hoped he hadn’t seen what was going on), and it took much time and effort to convince and force Billy to leave, which he eventually did, albeit reluctantly. After that close call, Hazel began feeling very unnerved by his maniacal behavior toward Nova, and it also made Hazel feel a little insignificant, like he’s lost all care in the universe toward her.

Now that she’s with her therapist, who happens to also be Billy’s mother, Hazel thinks about sharing her feelings of disapproval toward her son, but she decides against it, feeling too embarrassed to share them.

Seemingly sensing Hazel’s uneasiness to talk about her son, Dr. Chapman nods and changes topics. “How are the nightmares? Are they…any better than what they were before? Have the latest meds I have prescribed you been helping any?”

“Kinda,” Hazel shrugs. “I mean, I’m still having the nightmares, but they’re not as frequent anymore now that—” She pauses, suddenly having second thoughts about sharing the fact that Nova has returned and her belief that Nova’s presence may have relieved her of the nightmares since she didn’t have any the previous night…at least before she experienced that rude awakening.

“Now that…what, dear?” the doctor frowns when Hazel doesn’t continue.

Hazel shakes her head. “Nothing. Never mind. Yes, the new meds have been helping a little.”

“Really? Are you sure? Forgive me for mentioning this, but from the heavy bags under your eyes, you look as if you haven’t slept very well…at least last night.”

“That’s coz I didn’t,” Hazel groans automatically. “I was woken up in the middle of the night last night and couldn’t go back to sleep because of N—” She abruptly stops herself again from mentioning Nova.

“Because of…what?” Dr. Chapman says again, deepening her frown in a seemingly suspicious manner.

After a few more seconds, Hazel sighs heavily in a ‘what the hell’ manner and admits, “My friend came back last night. After all this time, Nova finally came back.”

“Oh, she finally came back? That’s brilliant.”

“Yeah…”

“You don’t sound so happy about it,” the therapist points out, hearing the slight discouragement in her patient’s voice.

Hazel shrugs. “It’s just… She came back an entire year late. She came back on the exact day she said she would, but instead of on that day last year, she came back on that same day this year—basically, yesterday.”

“Well, better she come back late than never at all, right?”

“I guess so.”

“You said she never texted or called you in the entire time she was gone. Did she tell you why, or where she’d been all this time?”

Hazel shrugs again. “Kinda, but it’s…difficult to explain.” She doesn’t want to reveal the secret of Nova being a time-traveler, hence what caused the delay. “I’d rather not share it. It’s a secret she didn’t want me ever sharing to anyone else. And even if she did allow me to tell you, you wouldn’t believe me anyway.”

The doctor chuckles, but at the same time she sounds a tad disappointed, which Hazel found a little strange. “I highly doubt that, dear, but I understand. Perhaps there are secrets best kept between those she trusts…in this case, you. Clearly she’s put a lot of trust in you; she must consider you as a very special friend. You must think of her the same way.”

“I…did,” Hazel admitted a little uncomfortably.

“You ‘did’ think of her the same way? You don’t still think of her that way?”

Hazel shrugs again, this time in indecision. “I mean…a lot’s changed between us, and not just coz it’s been over a year since we last saw each other…at least for me. Ever since she came back, it’s like she’s become a different person; she’s not the Nova I remember anymore.”

“Really? How so?”

“Well, lately—and by ‘lately,’ I mean since about an hour ago—she’s become much more distant and secretive, and she didn’t used to be that way. She used to tell me everything, no matter what, but now…” Hazel groans again before continuing. “I don’t know. It’s just not like her.”

“In what way has she been secretive and distant?” Dr. Chapman asks, leaning forward attentively in preparation to take many notes on her clipboard.

“Well…” Hazel explains hesitantly, “something happened to her last night. Something bad…to the point where she almost died.”

“Oh? What happened?”

“She snuck out in the middle of the night, well past the citywide curfew. I don’t know why; probably…for a bit of fresh air or something.” Hazel decides this to be a believable lie, assuming that Nova snuck out to temporarily escape the stress from their argument. Thinking back on it, she instantly regrets forgetting to warn Nova about the citywide curfew; if she knew Nova was planning to sneak out and if Hazel had remembered to warn her, Nova wouldn’t have gone out and gotten hurt. “Stupidly, I had completely forgotten to tell her about the curfew. Anyway, when she came back to the apartment… She was covered in blood.”

“Blimey,” the therapist gasps in shock.

“Someone, or something, attacked her last night. She barely made it back to the apartment; she passed out right when she entered—woke me up in the process. I spent the rest of the night and all morning by her side until she woke up later this afternoon, right before I came here; in fact, I almost called you to tell you I wasn’t going to make it in today, but thankfully she woke up before my usual time to come here. When I tried asking her where she went and how she got her injuries, she just pushed me away and told me to ‘leave her be’; she didn’t even thank me for watching over her. Again, it was very unlike her, especially with the way she treated Billy before they even met.”

“Really? She treated him poorly too?”

“Yeah,” Hazel growls, her anger rising again. “She judged him before she even met him, thinking him to secretly be an alien, or something. She said that these days you can’t trust anyone anymore, not even your best friends, believing that everyone could secretly be an alien, or had been replaced with one at some point, or working with one, or whatever. It was absolutely ridiculous!”

“And what gave her that ‘ridiculous’ idea, do you think—that everyone’s an alien?”

“She said her dad had put her in that thought process while she was travelling with him, and that she ‘couldn’t help’ but think that way now. She claimed that she hated that he made her think that way, but she believes she feels the need to at the same time, coz again you never know who, or even what, you’re talking to these days, what with how many times the world’s been invaded. Again, she didn’t used to be that way. I mean, I get that people change over time, but…this was a change I wasn’t expecting, especially from her. Like I said, it’s like she’s become an entirely different person—not the ‘Nova’ I remember anymore.” Hazel pauses before admitting sadly, “Not the ‘best friend’ I remember anymore.” She pauses once more for another few seconds before sighing, feeling her anger being washed away and replaced with sorrow. “I wish she’d never left. I wish things could go back to normal between us. Back to before I knew anything about her secret, her dad, and…everything else.”

“What can you tell me about her dad?” Dr. Chapman asks, leaning forward again. “Have you met him?”

“Yeah, briefly,” Hazel frowns, thinking her therapist’s question to be a bit odd, as well as wondering why she wants to switch topics from Nova to the Doctor so abruptly, especially when, as far as Hazel knows, the Doctor has absolutely nothing to do with her situation, and she’s unsure as to why he ever would. “Why? What’s he have to do with anything?”

“Well, I’m genuinely curious as to who he is and what kind of person he is. He sounds like he cares a great deal for his daughter—your friend—and I am trying to understand why he might feel the need to train his daughter into thinking the way you said he’s made her think—that absolutely no-one can be trusted unless they’ve proven themselves otherwise, like they have to earn her trust in order for her to trust them in return. Perhaps he’s lived through a difficult and dangerous past, being betrayed by those he once called ‘old friends,’ and that’s why he's trained his daughter into thinking the way that she does. He doesn’t want her to experience the same difficult and dangerous past that he’s experienced way back when. Am I correct in assuming that?”

“I…guess so. I mean, I don’t really know him that well, but that was a vibe I got from him during my brief time with him.”

“Do you remember his name?”

“He called himself ‘The Doctor.’”

In that moment, the therapist’s eyes seem to light up as if that’s the exact piece of into that she’s been looking for from the get-go, and strangely, Hazel found that extremely unsettling. “‘The Doctor’… Hmm…” Right after this, she immediately scribbles on her clipboard in an agitated way, apparently, and completely unknowingly, unsettling Hazel even more.

Because she finds this so unnerving, Hazel automatically feels the need to explain, not quite understanding why Nova’s father’s name (rather, title) is so important to her therapist, especially since ‘The Doctor’ is, in fact, a very common name for the majority of the world’s population, especially those who have legitimate doctorates in things. “I mean, that’s not even a proper name, even though he uses it like one. I’m sure he has a real name, but I don’t know what it is. Even Nova doesn’t know what her own dad’s name is, which is kinda weird. I mean, you’d think you’d know your own parents’ names by a certain age, right? I mean, I was, like, four when I first learned my paren—”

Unexpectedly, Dr. Chapman interrupts her patient as she swiftly gets up from her chair and begins beckoning her toward the office’s exit, “Thank you, Hazel dear; I think that will be all for today. You’ve told some very interesting stories today. I shall await more stories on our next visit. Perhaps you can invite your dear friend, Nova, to join us next time. I’ll see you two then. Have a great night, dear. Bye-Bye.” She doesn’t even allow Hazel to protest as she rushes her out of the room and immediately closes the door, even locking it so Hazel doesn’t attempt to come back in.

***

‘Dr. Barbara Chapman’ impatiently waits for her insanely gullible patient to leave. After another minute of incessant protesting through the door, eventually she hears the ignorant child’s footsteps fade away down the hall. After a few seconds of silence, she unlocks her office door and peeks outside to make sure the child is completely gone before she slips back and locks the door again.

“You can come out now, Billy,” she calls toward the closet door as she sits back in her chair, relieved to finally have a break from her scam as ‘Psychiatrist.’ “She’s gone.”

“So, I was right, then!” her youngest son exclaims as he exits the cramped closet where he had been hiding the entire time. “This whole time I was right about her little friend, ‘Nova’! I knew there was something suspicious about her the exact moment I met her! The way she talked about her ‘travels’… The amount of time it took her to return home… Her pathetic attempt at using a fake name for herself… The lying! It all makes sense now! She’s a time-traveler! More than that, she’s one of them!” He then turns to his mother with an incredulous frown. “I thought they were a myth! You told me they were a myth!”

The ‘doctor’ smirks, extremely thankful to have been wrong for all these years. “Obviously they’re not as much of a ‘myth’ as we all thought. It appears that the Time Lords are still very much alive. At least, some of them are.”

Clearly, they are still alive, since she’s believed for centuries that her late husband was killed by one of them—apparently Nova’s (if she’s really a Time Lord) own father, the Doctor, who had clearly survived her late husband’s attempt to steal his remaining Regenerations for their people, only to end up going missing shortly thereafter. She remembered the last time she had heard from her husband—who went by the name ‘Gregory Chapman’—he had managed to find a way to time-travel and claimed to have finally found a Time Lord at a university in London with a fresh batch of Regenerations and who worked as a professor, and he had secretly enrolled as a student in the Time Lord’s class in order to get close to him. When he finally did get close to the Time Lord (i.e. ‘The Doctor’), he lured him back in time to the early 1890s where he had built a machine that could drain and store the Time Lord’s Regenerations, and he had planned to keep the energy stored there until he had drained the Time Lord completely dry before killing him. After eliminating the Time Lord, her husband had planned to return to his family to inform them of his successful plan, and he was going to share the energy amongst his family so that they could live forever, far beyond their race’s standard lifespan. Unfortunately, ‘Dr. Chapman’s’ husband had dropped contact with her, and she hasn’t heard from him in centuries, making her believe that the Time Lord he had attempted to capture had overpowered him and slaughtered him out of vengeance. Ever since then, she and her young boys had spent centuries hunting down the Time Lord responsible for her husband’s death, as well as any and all other Time Lords still remaining after the Last Great Time War, and dispatch every last one of them, but not before draining them of their Regeneration Energy.

Now, it seems that they have successfully found another Time Lord (rather, a Time Lady) here at this university, and a rather young one at that, who had just begun her pursuit of knowledge and power through Time and Space—at least, according to her fatuous human friend, whom the ‘therapist’ had cleverly elected as her ‘patient’ and had convinced ‘Billy’ to get close to and eventually become her ‘boyfriend.’

More than that, they might also have a chance to avenge their dead family member by finally getting their revenge on the Doctor, seeing as the young Time Lady, ‘Nova’, could very well be his daughter, what with the rumors of the Doctor marrying and conceiving a child with the woman who was previously destined to strike him dead by Silencio Lake on the Plain of Sighs in the U.S. state of Utah on Planet Earth. Perhaps the ‘Chapmans’ could use the young Time Lady to lure the Doctor to her by using the same method that ‘Gregory Chapman’ used to eliminate the Doctor the first time, only this time ‘Barbara Chapman’ and her boys will be successful, as they have an opportunity to drain not one but two Time Lords of their energy—a father and a daughter. In ‘Barbara’s’ eyes, she and her sons could live another several millennia with their Regenerations.

In fact, they are just days away from perfecting the recreation of the ‘Power Bank’ in the university’s Student Center’s basement as they speak. Now, all they need is a Time Lord (or two).

Thinking about her primitive patient, ‘Hazel,’ the ‘therapist’ adds, turning to ‘Billy,’ “And it appears that your little human ‘girlfriend’ has been very close with one—perhaps even with an entire family of them—for a very long time. Everything that she has told us throughout our ‘sessions’—especially during this one—has proved that that is so. You heard everything clear as day.”

“So she lied to me, too, that night!” ‘Billy’ growls angrily. “Hazel knew all along, and she lied to me too; they both did! She acted strangely around her friend as well, I could tell—backing her up with other fake stories to hide her true identity, to hide the true reason for her absence! She must’ve known her secret since the ‘Sontaran’ incident!” His mother chuckles at his correct pronunciation of the potato-headed race from Sontar. “That must’ve been when she told her—when she ‘healed’ Hazel!”

“Yes,” ‘Dr. Chapman’ nods, “she did not heal Hazel with a ‘special ointment’ from a First-Aid Kit. She, in fact, healed her with a different kind of power. A power that can only be wielded by a Time Lord—Regeneration Energy.”

“Except that power isn’t just used for healing,” her son points out. “I’ve seen her use it for other purposes…some, deadly. I saw what she did last night! She used it to kill my brother! She destroyed him!”

“And yet he was reawakened a few moments later.”

“Yeah, but not from that energy. He told me he drank a significant amount of her blood just before she attacked him. Originally he believed her to be human, and yet her blood tasted ‘off’ to him, like it was ‘something different.’” ‘Billy’ then pauses, frowning at his mother. “You don’t suppose…her blood rescued Brody from Death’s clutches…do you?”

“You wonder why we perceive the Time Lords as the ‘immortal gods’ we believe them to be? Why our race—your father—has dedicated their lives to hunting them down, despite them always being believed to be a myth? Your brother is now living proof of that—that the Time Lords are real; that their power is real! He has now become a true immortal god himself; the blood of a Time Lord now runs in his veins; he can never die!”

“Why does he get to have all the power, and I don’t?” ‘Billy’ pouts while crossing his arms and rolling his eyes. “When can I get the power for myself? I want to be immortal too!”

“You blind child!” his mother suddenly snaps at him, an act that which unexpectedly throws him entirely off-guard. “You don’t see it! All this time you’ve never been able to see it! Nor has your ignorant brother!” How many times does she really have to explain it?

“See what, Mother?” her son frowns, evidently lost, which seems to irk his mother further.

She sighs and points out the painfully obvious. “The advantage you and your brother have! The advantage you and your brother have always had—you in particular! Why do you think I’ve been masquerading as a psychiatrist for the past six months—particularly, Hazel’s psychiatrist? Why do you think I’ve asked you to get close to her, becoming and posing as her ‘boyfriend,’ during all this time? Obviously I asked you to get close to her in order to find out more information about and get close to her little ‘Time Lady’ friend! From all the stories that silly little girl shared with me about her ‘unusual little friend,’ ‘Nova,’ I had my suspicions about her true identity from the very start. That she had a ‘secret’ that she made Hazel swear not to tell anyone else about… The stories about her ‘otherworldly healing powers’ and her extensive knowledge that is much beyond that of a typical college student… Her extended trips ‘out-of-town’ with her father, whom we now know as ‘The Doctor’, the ‘myth’ I’ve been telling you and your brother about for centuries, as well as the one who killed your father… And her severe lack of punctuality, which is very typical of a time-traveler. I have entire pages of evidence written right here on my clipboard, and all evidence points to one thing: your little girlfriend’s friend is, indeed, a Time Lord and the very thing we’ve been looking for the last five-hundred years. And we now have the advantage to live an infinite number of ‘five-hundred years’ with the young Time Lady’s blood and energy. Her blood healed and gave your brother new life and turned him into one of them…”

“And now, it’s my turn!” ‘Billy’ declares triumphantly. “He’s had his taste of her blood; let me have my chance to become a god! Let me get a taste this time!”

However, the ‘therapist’ knows that now is not the right time to celebrate yet; not before they’ve dispatched every Time Lord left in existence, starting with the Doctor and his little princess. “Not so fast, ignorant child!” she speaks up. “We shouldn’t expose ourselves too soon; not before we have our chance to take the little Time Tot’s powers for ourselves and take our rightful place as the ‘New Time Lords’ once and for all. We can’t risk the little brat finding out our plans, lest she rat us out to her father; you remember the stories I told you about what the Doctor does to those who even so much as attempt to take advantage of those he loves, and especially himself. He will have us all destroyed before we even have a chance to blink, just like your father. Your brother was a fool to expose himself to her to begin with; no doubt she’s already informed her father of the attack, long before we’re even ready.” For all she knows, her other ignorant son may have already doomed their entire family and race; if the Time Lords discover their plan too soon, they’ll lose their chance to become true immortals, all because her son got impatient when he went after the girl the previous night.

“And what if she happens to share the same power as her father,” her youngest son asks curiously, “or perhaps may even be more powerful? You once said you heard a rumor that his daughter could’ve been born ‘Deviant,’ meaning that she could be even more powerful than any species in existence, even her own.”

“We can’t take any chances of anyone finding out who we are,” his mother reminds him again, “certainly not the little Time Tot.” Honestly, how many more times does she have to repeat herself to her stupid children?

“And if she already knows?” he points out. “From her behavior, she’s already suspicious of me; she may already know what I am; not that I told her anything. And the fact that she snuck out last night, and Brody found her snooping around after ‘curfew’… No doubt she was investigating us, as, as you described, Time Lords are generally known to do.”

“Time Lords are clever,” ‘Dr. Chapman’ explains. “They can sense unusual oddities and wrongdoings a mile away, especially those outside the normal flow of Time. Even if she’s already suspicious of you, you can’t let her find out who you really are; at least not until it is the right time for her to find out. I will decide when it is the right time. All you and your brother need to worry about is keep her occupied until we need her. That shouldn’t be too difficult for you, as long as you keep a tight hold on your little human girlfriend. In fact, I would suggest that you tighten your grip on your girlfriend even more, as she is the key to our young ‘Deviant’ friend, as well as the key to controlling her. If any harm comes to your little girlfriend, the little Time Lady will do whatever it takes to save her; we could make her agree to whatever we please until the human child is out of danger.”

“So, what do you want me to do?” ‘Billy’ asks, puzzled. “I have a feeling Nova will refuse to come near me. Hazel already pushed me away this morning when I tried visiting them; said that Nova had ‘caught a cold last night’ and didn’t want visitors. She acted odd about it, like she really didn’t want me there, but I could tell she was hiding something. In fact, when I managed to push past her and into the apartment briefly, I caught a glimpse of Nova sleeping in her bed, but her skin was glowing unnaturally, and I could tell the glow was not from the sunlight. Considering what happened to Brody last night, I’m willing to bet Nova was doing that ‘thing’ that Time Lords do when they come near death; I could practically smell the energy coming off of her; the scent was incredibly strong. What did you call it— ‘Reincarnating’?”

“‘Regenerating,’” his mother corrects him, “but that’s not important. What’s important is for you and Brody to get closer with Hazel and Nova and find out everything you can about Nova’s little ‘secret.’ No matter your methods, we must confirm whether or not she really is a Time Lord and therefore the Doctor’s daughter. Once we know, we shall be prepared to act, but only when it is the right time.”

Looking back on their first session together, the ‘therapist’ remembered suggesting to Hazel that she “part ways” with Nova, and it’s not until just now that she realizes how unbelievably stupid that suggestion was. By suggesting that, even if Hazel had actually convinced Nova to leave the moment she returned, that would’ve botched their chances of stealing the young Time Lady’s Regenerations long ago (i.e. yesterday). Obviously they want the Time Lady to stay in town, at least long enough until the machine is complete and ready for extraction. Immediately after this conversation, she will send Hazel a text message asking her to forget what they previously talked about the girls “going their separate ways” and, instead, do everything Hazel can to keep Nova close and prevent her from leaving again, as the ‘Chapmans’ may not have another opportunity to become true immortals for a very long time, possibly ever. In which case, it is absolutely vital that their plan succeeds.

“The Time Lords have been in power long enough,” she says, smirking deviously at her son, “even if they should’ve been extinct long ago! Now it’s our turn!”

Chapter Text

"I  told  you, you two wouldn't win this fight," the girl pants and sighs in satisfaction as she looks down on the boys' unconscious forms. "I swear, you dimwits never listen. Nobody ever listens. S'pose I have one of those faces."

There is a loud—much louder than, of course, intended (God, I’m such an idiot!)—snigger from off-camera. At this, the girl suddenly gasps and looks toward the camera, recognizes that she is being recorded, and immediately flees from the scene.

“Wait!” the sound of my voice calls out to the girl before the video abruptly ends.

If anyone were to ask me how many times I have seen this video, I wouldn’t be able to because I have honestly lost count; but if I had to guess, I’d say this would be at least the thirtieth time today. Geez, why would you watch that video that many times? one might ask. Well, even I have to admit the video appears to be fake, but it really isn’t. Sure, the scene was very dark, which made the video extremely fuzzy and blurry and pretty much impossible to make out any major details, but I know what I saw, at least with my own eyes. Granted, other viewers might think the boys’ vampire fangs and ‘teleportation’ ability might be CGI that was edited later, and the dead body might be mistaken for a clever stage prop which would explain the missing body parts and blood, but I swear on all of my lives that the video is not edited in any shape or form. Even with all these features, even I have to admit that the video does seem like a cleverly edited piece from a horror movie, especially the fight between the girl and the boys, but again, it isn’t; the girl was truly fighting for her life against alien vampires.

At least, I think they are alien vampires. Again, it was hard to tell with how dark the place was, but I’m fairly certain I saw literal vampire fangs grow in place of their normal teeth. Granted, in the video the fangs themselves are hard to see and truly appear grainy like they were poorly CGI’ed, but in reality I could see the fangs clear as day, same for the dead body which was not a stage prop. Oh god, the smell… I can still smell the horrible stench in my airways even now.

If only I could show Hazel this video, but I’m pretty sure she’d think the video to be fake too. Just a typical scene from a fan-made horror movie that ‘coincidentally’ features her boyfriend as one of the ‘actors’. At least, I would imagine she’d think of that as a funny coincidence (and a cool one, because “Hey, look; it’s my boyfriend! I didn’t know he was an actor! When’s the full movie come out? I can’t wait to see it!”), but of course I know better.

Then again, I don’t know if I should show her this video. As much as I want to, would it even be safe for her to see it? Even if she watches the video and truly thinks it to be fan-made, what would Billy think of her knowing that I’d shown her the video? What if Hazel thinks it isn’t fan-made and actually starts believing me about her boyfriend being a legitimate alien vampire? As much as I want her to know—as who knows; it might save her life one day, especially if Billy decides to try anything—I don’t want her to be involved in anything alien ever again, especially after what she went through with the Silence. In fact, I made a personal vow to myself that this would never happen again. I’ve scarred her enough already, ever since that time we split in the alley. Never again.

There is an abrupt and unexpected knock at my bedroom door.

“Hey, uh…Nov?” Hazel asks as she hesitantly and slowly peeks her head around the doorframe, like she isn’t sure if she’s allowed in my room. “Can, uh…we talk?”

Honestly, I’m genuinely surprised that she wants to talk to me, especially after we’ve been avoiding each other like the plague since our argument a few nights back. Of course she feels unsure as to whether or not I want to talk to her, especially after all the things she said to me during our argument.

“Haze!” I say as I swiftly turn off the video and set my phone down, not wanting to share the video with her…at least yet. “Yeah, sure, we can talk. What’s wrong? Do you…need help with something?” Or are you here to apologize? I add in my head, as that’s the only ‘talk’ I will accept from her in the present moment.

“Um, not really,” she says as she awkwardly enters the room before admitting, “Actually, I…wanted to apologize.”

Good, I scoff. That argument was absolutely ridiculous.

“For what I said about feeling like I no longer knew you…” she continues, feeling slightly uncomfortable (of course; apologies are always uncomfortable). “That was an awful thing to say. I never thought of the possibility that you were struggling so much to fit in with your new life with your bio-parents, and me here without—” She pauses again before grunting and saying instead, “I-I’m sorry. I should’ve been more patient with you. I’m sorry I lost hope.”

Well, I think to myself, at least she’s honest. Of course I’ve been around my father long enough to see when he, or anybody else, is lying. God, I am so sick of that rule, especially from him.

“Don’t worry about it,” I say, shaking my head. “I knew that wasn’t really you talking anyway. I’m sorry too…for everything. Literally everything, especially what you went through with the Silence. I think about that all the time…and you’re right; maybe things would have been better if I hadn’t told you my secret. This way you would never have been targeted.” At this, I think again about suggesting that I delete her memories of everything to do with my secret, but I decide against it, remembering that Hazel was highly against it the first time and probably still will be if I suggest it now. “And for not paying attention to when Dad messed up the time-coordinates… Having to make you wait so long and eventually lose hope in me never—”

“Don’t worry about that either,” Hazel interrupts. “I get that that wasn’t your fault. None of that stuff was entirely your fault, including what happened with the Silence. You were just trying to do what you thought was right. I totally get it.”

“No, all of that was entirely my fault,” I insist. “When I insisted that we split up to confuse the Silence in that alley… That was stupid. It hadn’t occurred to me that they were after you as well; of course they were after you too. If I hadn’t gone through with that stupid idea, Mom would have easily saved both of us; that was how things were supposed to happen. I’m sorry, Haze. You should never have been involved in any of that stuff. If I hadn’t told you my stupid secret—”

“Hey!” Hazel interrupts again as she rushes up to me and wraps her arms around me in a tight hug. “I said you didn’t need to worry about that anymore. I forgive you.”

“Really?” I say, highly doubting her words.

“Really.” Hazel pulls away and smiles. “I do. Honest to God. I’d be a terrible friend if I never learned to forgive you.”

“How could I possibly deserve your forgiveness, after everything I put you through?” What I did was unforgivable, especially since she could have been killed, just like my guardians. If my father-guardian hadn’t spoken up to shut her up…

She shrugs before admitting, “My last therapy session has helped me rethink a lot of things between us…” She pauses for a few seconds like she’s having a disturbing thought that she refuses to think about, and so says instead, “But none of that’s important right now. What’s really important for you to know is that I completely forgive you. For everything. My last therapy session made me realize that I’m an idiot and that I should listen to you more, especially when you tell me to stay put or go home for my own safety.”

For some odd reason, I get the sense that she is lying—at least partially—but instead I ignore the feeling and say with a chuckle, “Haze, you’re not an idiot. You’re the smartest person I know.”

“You and I both know that’s a lie,” she chuckles back. “There’s not a living being in the universe who’s smarter than your dad.”

I sigh and roll my eyes teasingly. “Okay, you’re the smartest human I know. How about that?”

She pauses, then shrugs, “Meh. Good enough for me.” We both laugh for several seconds before she admits with a sigh, “I’ve missed this. I’ve missed us. The times we’d have together…”

“Me too,” I nod solemnly. “For real.”

“I believe you,” Hazel smiles, and I sigh in relief. She has absolutely no idea how much better that makes me feel… How much weight is lifted from both of my hearts.

“So…was that all you wanted to talk to me about?” I ask curiously. “Or was there…something else?”

“Technically, it was something else,” Hazel admits. “I was wondering… Well, Billy was wondering…” She pauses again as if having second thoughts.

“Yeah?” I say, urging her to say what she, for some odd reason, didn’t want to say anyway.

Finally, she does sigh and admit anyway, “If you might be interested in us going on a double-date tonight.”

Okay… I definitely wasn’t expecting that. “Double-date?” I say in genuine shock. “Tonight? But I don’t have anyone to go with.” I immediately think about reminding her about my being warned that a ‘lover’ would one day betray me, but I decide against it.

“Sure you do,” she says. “You can go with his brother. I’ll, of course, be going with Billy.”

His brother… I think to myself as a shiver runs down my spine. The guy who tried and nearly succeeded to kill me my first night back. Of course he will be my date. Why wouldn’t he be?

Then again, he did get his ass whooped in an awesomely epic battle with the blonde girl, as did Billy—which of course I have video proof of if they ever try to deny it. Still, if they try it again with me, I doubt I’ll be able to take them down as easily as the blonde girl had.

Frankly I’m still trying to wrap my head around how in the hell Billy’s brother had survived what I did to him at the park. Perhaps I’ll find out during the date…hopefully.

However, to keep my initial meeting with her boyfriend’s brother a secret, I say to Hazel, “But…I’ve never met his brother before.”

“So?” she shrugs. “You can meet him at the date; that’s the whole point of it anyway. Billy says he and his brother want to get to know you a bit more, and he thought this would be a perfect way to do so. I’ve actually never met his brother either, so I’m really excited to meet him as well.” She then knits her eyebrows uncertainly and adds, “That is, if you’re up for it.”

‘If you’re up for it.’ In other words, ‘Unless a Time Lord thing comes up…’ which this very well could be. Honestly, I’d be surprised if it wasn’t.

“If you’re not—”

“Yes!” I say automatically without letting Hazel finish. “I am interested. I’d love to get to know Billy a bit more. Obviously I was wrong to have judged him without truly knowing him. Let me make up for my lousy behavior and apologize properly during the date. We can ‘start over,’ so to speak.” And so I remain on the boys’ good side lest they decide to kill us anyway, I add in my head. And yours, since you still think I don’t trust them… Which technically I don’t, so this is really all just for show.

“Yes, I was about to suggest the same thing,” she nods in agreement. “I’ll tell Billy you’re interested, and we’ll set up a time and place. I’ll let you know what we decide.”

“Great,” I attempt to put on a genuine smile as she begins leaving the room. “Thanks. I can’t wait.”

The exact moment my best friend leaves the room before closing the door behind her, I immediately slap myself in the forehead several times until the pain becomes unbearable. You IDIOT! I chastise myself. How could you do that?! Now you’ve just signed your own death certificate...AGAIN!

Of course, this double-date won’t be a normal double-date. Of course, Billy and his brother won’t just be ‘getting to know’ me during this thing. No. They will want to ‘get to know’ the real me—i.e. Nova Susan Song and not Sydney Marie Elise. In which case, this ‘double-date’ will be more of an interrogation than anything else.

Of course, I will be expecting this, and I’ve already got a plan prepared. Technically, it’s a plan I promised my father ages ago I’d do while back on human soil, that plan being that if anyone were to ask me or mention anything about Time Lords, TARDISes, etc., I will simply pretend like I haven’t a clue what the person is talking about, which will—hopefully—throw them off. They can’t suspect I’m me if I pretend to be someone else, right?

“‘Time Lord’? What in the world is that? Is that something from Star Trek? Sounds badass!”

“‘Tardis’? Sounds almost like ‘tortoise’, like a turtle. Or ‘Tervis’ like the brand that sells insulated water bottles and stuff.”

Hopefully, Hazel will play along with this idea too. After all, I did make her promise years ago not to reveal anything about my true heritage lest the knowledge ends up into the wrong hands. Though, she seems very adamant that Billy is not a bad person and so may have told him much about my secret while I was gone. I mean, he did mention that Hazel told him about the Sontaran attack at the arcade; who knows what other things she may have told him without paying attention to the fact that she is technically not supposed to talk about them at all. In which case, I’ll need to have a chat with her about it before our ‘little outing’ tonight.

Another thing I’m desperate to talk to Hazel about is how much danger we’re putting ourselves into with agreeing to this ‘date’. She mentioned that she had known and dated Billy for at least six months, and during that entire time, she had absolutely no idea that she was dating an alien vampire, and she still doesn’t now. I mean, of course she doesn’t. I’m pretty sure she would’ve told me her suspicions sooner—like, immediately after I returned home—but she hasn’t, which makes me think that she either truly has no clue, or that Billy had made her swear not to say anything, but I’m more certain on the former since I’ve seen the way she talks about and acts around him—like she really likes him. Moreover, like she totally trusts him, and this, in my mind, is the biggest red flag of all. After what I discovered at the abandoned building last night, it is totally wrong for her to trust a murderer, and of course she knows absolutely nothing.

What disgusts me even more is the immense likeliness that in Billy’s mind, there is absolutely no reason for Hazel to be alive right now—at least, logically. If Billy and his family of alien vampires are solely here for me—and, by extension, my Time Lord energy; although I’m not sure why he would need it since vampires are supposedly already immortal—it is very likely that he is only dating Hazel and keeping her alive to get close to me. In other words, in reality, he doesn’t have a care in the world about Hazel whatsoever and, therefore, has no reason to keep her alive. She’s still alive solely because we’re best friends, and if I hadn’t come home…

This thought makes me incredibly nervous about the date/interrogation. By agreeing to go, I am putting my life, and especially Hazel’s, on the line; in other words, depending on how I answer the questions, I could end up killing both of us, especially Hazel. Of course, I had hoped she’d never be involved in any alien things again, but it could be she has been involved in one with Billy for six months straight, maybe longer, and not even known it; and now that I am back, she’s become more involved than ever. Now that I am back, it’s my responsibility to keep Hazel alive and safe as long as possible. Though, tonight, keeping her safe will be difficult, with Billy and his brother going to watch me like hungry vultures; the least I can do is make sure they don’t have her for dinner instead of whatever we’re going to have for our actual meals.

Ironically enough, I find out later in the day that Billy had chosen a steakhouse for our date, which automatically made me snort and think, Ha! Typical for a vampire to choose the meatiest and bloodiest restaurant in the city. Hopefully this means he’ll leave the meat on our own bones alone, right? Of course, I make sure to knock on physical wood immediately after this thought comes to mind—while, at the same time, ignoring Hazel’s bewildered look—lest I end up screwing us.

“Hey, Haze?” I ask her hesitantly as we put on our coats. “I, uh…have a favor to ask you tonight.”

“Sure. What is it?” she asks curiously.

I sigh, struggling to explain without angering her further. “I… If you must call me by my name, I would prefer you to use my old name ‘Sydney.’ At least around Billy.” Even if he already knows my true name—and of course he does—perhaps if I used my other name long enough, he’d think that name to be my real name instead.

“Why?” Hazel growls in annoyance, still irked about our argument. “You still don’t trust him enough to use your regular name?”

I bite my tongue hard to prevent myself from automatically revealing the truth. “Ye—No!”

“You didn’t seem to have a problem with using your regular name the other night when you first met him,” she points out angrily. “Plus ‘Nova’ is a very common name.”

I sigh again. “That’s true. It may be a common name, but in recent years it’s become somewhat dangerous…at least for me.”

“I don’t get it,” Hazel frowns. “What’s so dangerous about your name now?”

“Because it refers to a Time Lord,” I explain, “and these days the entire universe is after Time Lords, particularly me. They want to kill me for my powers. You know this already; I’ve told you this a gazillion times. They especially want to kill me now that I’ve been revealed to be Deviant.”

She pauses as her frown deepens. “I…still don’t get what that means, but I seriously doubt Billy and his brother will try to kill you tonight—or literally any other time. He doesn’t even know you’re Time Lord; he probably doesn’t know what a Time Lord even is. Hardly anyone does—if any.”

Trust me, Haze, I think to myself. These days everyone knows what a Time Lord is, and they’d give anything to see us all disappear—permanently.

“No, but they might if you keep using my real name,” I say before admitting, “Even Dad said—”

“You don’t know him like I do!” she argues, interrupting me. “He’s not like that! He’s not a murderer; that’s absolutely ridiculous! If you’ve been here, you’d know that!”

Again, I have to bite my tongue to refrain from saying that Billy is a murderer. Instead, I say, “I…never said he was a murderer. And I’m sorry I haven’t been here, but I promise, after tonight, I will see Billy differently. I will never judge him again after tonight. You have my word.”

Of course, all these words are lies, knowing what I’ve seen at the abandoned building, as well as what I captured on camera. Not that I captured the actual murder, but I did manage to capture his bloody clothes and sharp fangs, whether people mistake them for tacky CGI or otherwise.

That fight, though… You can’t deny it was totally badass!

“But seriously, Haze, listen,” I say, steering back on topic. “Even Dad said that while I’m back home, I use my ‘Sydney’ name instead of my real name.” I remember him catching me before I fully left the TARDIS and asking me to do this while I was away. “In fact, he was rather adamant about it, and honestly I agree. These days everyone knows who and what I am, so it’s much safer that I use a different name so no one suspects anything; it’s why he had my guardians name me a different name when he gave me up. Even Dad often uses a made-up name for himself, and he’s insisted that I start doing the same for my own safety… And yours.”

I pause, waiting for Hazel to respond, but she remains silent.

“Please, Haze,” I beg after several seconds. “Do this for me. I don’t want to be responsible for another thing to happen to you. Not again.”

If it’s true that she may already be a part of a ‘thing’ and not even know it, I certainly don’t want to be responsible for that ‘thing’ to end up scarring her like the Silence did…or worse, kill her. Again, I’ve scarred her enough already.

Of course, she knows how much I’ve scarred her. I can see it in her eyes—her longing for things to go back to normal between us, despite nothing ever going to be normal between us again, after all the things that have changed in our lives. Of course, despite our earlier discussion this morning, I feel guilty and ashamed for everything that’s happened to us (and especially Hazel), and honestly I’m pretty sure I’ll feel this way for the rest of my Regeneration Cycle. I can sense Hazel’s reluctance to accept the changes as they are, as well as accept that neither of them will ever be returned to the way they were. Unfortunately, we have no choice but to accept the ‘Regeneration’ that each of us have gone through.

Before either of us can say anything, Hazel’s phone chimes, interrupting us from our thoughts and regrets.

“Fine,” she sighs heavily as she checks her phone. “They’re here. Let’s go.”

After she grabs her purse and keys, we leave the apartment and rush downstairs to meet Billy and his brother, whom are both (no surprise) dressed in much cleaner clothes from last night—not a drop of blood on them—standing at the foot of the stairs waiting for us.

“Hey, Babe,” Hazel smiles and greets Billy warmly as she gives him a hug and peck on the cheek. “Good to see you again.”

“It’s always good to see you, Babe,” Billy says as he returns her hug, though I sense a small hint of sarcasm in his words, particularly when he enunciates the words ‘always’ and ‘you’. I quickly hide my suspicious frown when he glances toward me, and he smiles, though his smile looks predatory. “You as well, Nova. Glad you could make it.”

“I’m…glad I could too,” I smile back, albeit awkwardly. “And please call me ‘Sydney.’ I told you ‘Nova’ was just a silly nickname.” At this, Hazel rolls her eyes, but I ignore her.

“This is my brother Brody,” Billy says, gesturing to the bigger, taller boy. At least, he looks bigger and taller since I last saw him, which could be from whatever cured him from the incineration. “He’ll be your date tonight.”

I attempt a smile at Brody, but my smile drops when I see his murderous stare, as if to say ‘You tried to kill me—in fact, you did kill me—and I intend to kill you back, painfully and slowly.’ Thankfully, instead, he says out loud while holding out a hand for me to shake (rather, for him to crush my hand like he would an empty soda can), “Hello, Nova. Happy to have you for dinner.”

Oh boy, I groan in my head. Yeah, I’ve really messed things up with this guy. Of course, he literally wants to have me for dinner; no doubt this is how he wants to ‘kill me back, painfully and slowly’.

Nevertheless, I laugh at his ‘joke’, despite knowing it wasn’t a joke at all. “Uh… You mean you’re happy to have me as a date for dinner, right?” I glance at Hazel while continuing to laugh, but, surprisingly, she doesn’t laugh with me, seeming almost as unsettled by his words as I am. Almost. Perhaps she may start believing me after this.

“Of course!” Billy speaks up for his brother. “That is what he means. You must forgive him; he’s been waiting to eat all day. We both have.” At this, both brothers stare at me as if to indicate that I have been the meal they’ve been waiting to eat. Of course, since they are cannibalistic vampires and only eat human flesh—or Time Lord flesh in my case.

“You mean you literally haven’t eaten all day?” Hazel speaks up to break the awkward tension. “Like, not even breakfast or lunch?”

“No, we have,” her boyfriend confirms, which automatically makes me think in response, Like what; a stray cat, dog, or hobo?

“Anyway, we’d better head to the steakhouse,” Billy says as he checks his watch. “We don’t want to be late for our reservation.” He begins walking down the street with Hazel’s arm looped through his, though I can sense his reluctance to allow this.

I glance toward Brody, and, not surprisingly, he doesn’t offer his own arm to me. Instead—also no surprise—he continues staring at me hungrily. To ignore the awkwardness, I gesture for him to follow the others, saying as casually as I can muster, “After you.” Deep down, I want to make sure he—rather, they—stay in front of me at all times to make sure they don’t try anything.

However, he, of course, refuses to let me go along with my plan, as he says in almost a growl, “Ladies first.”

Okay… I think as I go along with his plan instead. Of course, I don’t want to start off the date on his bad side, lest he try to maul me again, which I can see in his eyes that he seems desperate to do, so I just start walking ahead of him.

As we walk, I feel increasingly uncomfortable at how close Brody is walking behind me, again like a hungry tiger stalking a helpless rabbit, and so I feel the need to raise my coat higher up my neck to avoid exposing my skin, especially since he keeps sniffing at me like how a dog would when sniffing out treats, except it’s my blood he’s really smelling. The more he does this, the more I want to tell Hazel to cancel the date so we can go home, but I don’t want to ruin her happy mood around her ‘boyfriend’ (and, needless to say, I don’t want to look like a weakling by speaking up that I’m not comfortable and so want to bail), as well as say anything around the brothers lest they get suspicious, though I figure they may already be suspicious of me, hence why they arranged this ‘date’ in the first place. On that thought, I decide to suck it up and stick with my ‘being 100% human’ plan for as long as possible and hope I don’t botch up the date.

Seeing how happy Hazel is with Billy, it is honestly highly disturbing. Though I can totally understand her genuine happiness, as it’s highly logical for her to feel that way since Billy was the only one who has been there for Hazel and kept her from losing her sanity. This, of course, ups my guilt, but at the same time it’s disturbing to think about her happiness toward her boyfriend as being wrong, as being in love with a psycho-alien-vampire-murderer is wrong. This bit of knowledge makes me more and more desperate to tell Hazel the truth about Billy, but again I don’t want to make her go through any more ‘Time Lord’ and ‘alien’ stuff again, nor do I want to ruin her happiness, especially since this is the happiest I’ve seen Hazel since my return, and maybe even before my return after meeting Billy, and of course I would be a horrible friend for doing that to her, especially with how strained our friendship has become since my Regeneration and increased time away from home. Of course, I would love to invite Hazel to travel in the TARDIS with us if I could, but at the same time I don’t want to put her in danger, knowing how dangerous our travels have become since the universe’s discovery of me being Deviant as well as the possibility of everyone being aware of my father being on his final life. Then again, even if Hazel did agree to travel with us, she would want to run away at the first sign of danger rather than face it head-on like Dad and I would usually do, so sadly her travelling with us might not be ideal for her.

And with the Silence still being out there, she definitely wouldn’t want to run into them again. I’m suddenly wondering if it was right to tell Hazel that Madame Kovarian survived the attack at the Silence base—having turned herself into a Flesh duplicate to prevent direct attacks—and if maybe that piece of knowledge had triggered Hazel’s paranoia of them coming back for her and using her as bait again. Perhaps Billy, Brody, and their mother may secretly be Silence members sent by Kovarian to target me again, only this time Kovarian wants to kill me now, since, at this point, she’s given up trying to force me to join her twisted cult and kill my father. I suppose this makes sense, since I did try to legitimately kill her twice now; it’s no surprise that Kovarian would change her mind, especially after she’d changed her mind about continuing to train my mother after finding out she betrayed the Silence by falling in love, marrying, and having a kid with the person she was originally tasked to assassinate, and so wants to kill my mother now because of it.

With these thoughts in mind, while we’re at the restaurant, I will make sure to check my food and beverage for anything the boys might use to kill me, such as razorblades in my mashed potatoes or Judas Tree poison in my Diet Coke.

Shortly after we arrive at the restaurant, we are seated at a booth with a wall across the far side where those who sit on that side would not be able to get up unless they asked the person sitting on the outside to get up first. Naturally, Hazel doesn’t think twice about it and scoots across the booth and against the wall as Billy seats next to her. Of course, I don’t like this, since Billy has literally trapped her against the wall, with nowhere for Hazel to escape should he decide to go after her. Glancing at Brody, I step back in the hopes that Brody would take the hint that I am letting him slide in first, but of course he isn’t going to make this easy.

“After you,” he says as he gestures to the far side in the exact same way I gestured for him to follow Hazel and Billy on our walk over.

However, this time I am determined to get my way. “Actually, I prefer to sit on the outside,” I say. “You know…in case I need to leave the table for…something.” I end up stuttering this last bit without really meaning to.

No surprise, he doesn’t take this well. “For what?” he snaps, making everyone, including the employee who seated us, flinch. “You plan to go somewhere? You plan to run away?” I unconsciously glance at Billy to see him glaring at me, clearly suspicious that I may truly run—and, quite honestly, the temptation is very high.

I have to bite my tongue from automatically answering ‘yes’, so I say instead, “What? No! I just… I’m a girl, and I may need to…you know—”

“Dude!” Hazel snaps in annoyance, clearly believing that I’m making up some lame excuse to bail from the date. “Just sit down!” She says this in a tone like I am rudely dismissing Brody’s attempts at being a gentleman toward me, but of course I know the truth.

However, I decide to keep my mouth shut, not wanting to put an even bigger strain on our already crumbling friendship, and keep up appearances as I reluctantly slide myself against the wall, and of course Brody immediately slides in almost right against me to show I—like Hazel—have nowhere to escape even if I wanted to.

I glance timidly up at Hazel, who looks at me in a ‘what the hell is your problem?’ manner, and of course I feel conflicted on how to explain my behavior versus not explain it at all, especially while Billy and Brody are nearby, and so I just shrug at her instead and look down at the floor like a shameful toddler. Our waitress walks by a few seconds later for our drink orders, and we give her our orders before she walks off.

“No purse, ‘Sydney’?” Billy suddenly speaks up, trying to sound casual, though I sense a hint of suspicion to it. Also, he enunciates my old name like he’s putting air-quotes around it, like he knows that isn’t my real name.

To quickly hide my own suspicion, I flinch as if not expecting him to talk to me, “Huh? What?”

“All girls carry purses,” he points out. “Hazel has one… But you don’t. Why is that?”

I shrug, trying to act casual about it. “Not all girls carry purses. It’s actually perfectly normal for some girls not to use purses, believe it or not.”

“I don’t believe it,” he shakes his head, which was something I honestly knew he would say.

Regardless, I scoff in a ‘okay, whatever’ manner before replying. “I choose not to because I don’t see the need to when pockets seem to work well enough.” Especially bigger-on-the-inside pockets, I add in my head. Honestly, why would I need a giant purse when the only things I carry on a daily basis these days are my phone, sonic screwdriver, and TARDIS key? If I was human, I doubt I’d need a purse for those things even then. Also, I’m certain Time Ladies never used purses for the same reason on Gallifrey; that, or if they did use purses, they made them bigger on the inside like Hermione Granger’s in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.

“I still don’t believe you,” Billy says again, only this time he says it in a way like he’s growing impatient with me clearly avoiding to share the truth.

“Neither do I,” Brody speaks up, no surprise feeling the same as his brother. The fact that both brothers are clearly showing signs that they know my true identity makes me super uncomfortable, even though technically I’m not lying about my lack of using a purse.

Thankfully, Hazel sticks up for me, saying, “What does it matter whether she uses purses or not? It’s not a crime for a girl not to use a purse. Some girls just choose not to use them. That is perfectly normal for them.”

At this, Billy puts his hands up in seeming surrender and says in an innocent tone while wrapping his arm casually around Hazel’s shoulder, “Hey, babe, I didn’t say it was a crime. We’re just genuinely curious.”

Despite this, I get the sense that he is actually putting his hands up as if to back away like he caught himself accidentally stepping out of character, and he quickly tries to hide this fact as he puts his arm around Hazel as a way to casually step back into character.

“I’m sorry, Sydney,” he shrugs at me in apology. “I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable. It’s just… You’re not like other girls. Hazel’s told me much about you, but the things she’s told me about you aren’t exactly…normal. At least, how I imagine a normal girl to act. I mean, not many girls choose to intentionally look for trouble and get involved in it. Normally, people run away from danger, but you… You choose to run toward the danger and face it head-on. I’m surprised you have the courage to do that. It doesn’t seem…human.” Again, on the word ‘human’, he enunciates it like he knows the truth that I’m not.

Of course, I want to say “That’s coz I’m not human, Billy-boy!” as well as “You’re one to talk, Space-Dracula-wannabe!”—though I don’t know which phrase would sound more badass if I did say them out loud—but I intentionally choose not to say either phrase.

Instead, I say with a frown, “You think girls aren’t meant to have that much courage? You think they’re meant to be weak?” Clearly you haven’t seen what I did to your brother the other night, I think in my head. Of course, Brody is quite familiar with my power, and I glance at him to see how he reacts to my words, and of course I am instantly disturbed to see him indeed knowing what I’m talking about and looks at me like he wants to get back at me for it, not caring if we are in a public place. Like he plans to win the next round and will not give up until he does…until I am properly dead with no Regenerations.

Billy pauses, seemingly taken aback. “No, I’m not saying that. I’m saying…that it’s cool that you’re that brave. I wish I was that brave.”

“Me too,” Hazel agrees. “You have no idea how much I want to get back at those scumbags for what they did to me! I still can’t believe what they did to your father-guardian! That was so cruel! All he did was stand up to them, and they killed him! He stood up for you!”

Of course, her words make my guilt return, especially for what happened to my father-guardian, whom I still miss terribly, same for my mother-guardian who had sacrificed her life for me and my family to be with him.

“Your ‘father-guardian’?” Billy frowns at me, clearly feigning puzzlement. “He wasn’t your real father?” He then pauses and says, “I mean, of course he wasn’t. He adopted you, right? Hazel said you met your real parents only last year, at the same time that she was kidnapped by those ‘Silent’ people. What are they like? Your real parents, I mean.”

As Billy says this, the waitress comes back with our drinks and asks each of us for our dinner orders. After we give them, she takes our menus and leaves.

“Bet your real parents aren’t normal either,” Billy continues from the last conversation before the waitress came back to our table, deepening his voice as a way to further show he knows the truth about my non-humanness.

However, I fully expected him to bring up the topic of my biological parents, and so I say what I planned to say from the start, “Actually, they are.”

“You’re lying,” Brody glares at me, but I refuse to back down.

I glare back at him in a ‘you wanna bet, pal?’ manner—at least, I try to make my glare look like that—before saying, “No, I’m not. My mom’s an archaeologist, and my dad’s a…history professor. They both study and teach History. There’s really not that much to talk about them.”

“I highly doubt that,” Billy scoffs. “If your parents are history professors and archaeologists, that means they’ve seen things. I bet they’ve got loads of stories to tell. Maybe they’ve even witnessed historical events, or been a part of them. You know…like time-travelers.” He raises a knowing eyebrow at me on the phrase ‘time-travelers’.

Admittedly, seeing the way Billy enunciated the phrase ‘time-travelers’ makes me more confident that he and Brody know my true identity, as well as more concerned for my life as well as Hazel’s. Despite this, I decide to stay in character and laugh like it’s all a big joke.

“Time-Travel?” I chortle with laughter. “Are you kidding me? You think Time-Travel is real?” I turn to Hazel as if to say ‘Can you believe this guy?’, and at first Hazel doesn’t laugh, but then she senses my ‘act’ and immediately laughs along with me, albeit in an awkward way. “That only exists in Sci-Fi movies!” I continue. “This isn’t a Sci-Fi movie! Sure, aliens are real, but Time-Travel? Come on, that’s ridiculous!”

“Perhaps not,” Billy says, his face suddenly turning serious. He then leans forward, beckoning us to join him in the middle, and deepens his voice as if sharing a dark secret. “Rumor has it that a mysterious blue box has been seen all around the world, magically appearing and disappearing at random times and places…except the times and places aren’t random. Rumor is, the blue box only appears when there is great peril. It’s been written in many books and conspiracy websites. Surely you lot have heard of it.” When saying the phrase ‘you lot’, he is referring to me specifically.

I glance nervously at Hazel, who looks back at me with equal nervousness. “A blue box that appears and disappears magically?” I stutter and clear my throat while awkwardly sipping my Diet Coke. “Sounds…interesting.”

“Very…C. S. Lewis,” Hazel adds without thinking.

“Haze!” I gasp automatically in a whisper, thinking she may have blown our cover with that description, since it describes the TARDIS way too closely. Of course, when seeing the interior of the TARDIS, that’s when the ‘C.S. Lewis’ vibe comes in, since its interior greatly likens to the magical wardrobe from The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe.

“What?” Hazel shrugs, evidently totally oblivious to her mistake.

I confirm telepathically to her, of course not wanting Billy and Brody to know, ‘Don’t describe it like that. They can’t know about the TARDIS. They can’t know that we know about the TARDIS. They can’t know anything. Remember?’

“Sorry. I thought—” She swiftly pauses, finally realizing her mistake.

Unfortunately, she realizes her mistake too late as Billy speaks up with a raised eyebrow, “So you have heard of it, then. Both of you have.”

“Of course you have,” Brody agrees. “You know of it. You’ve seen it.”

I shudder, struggling to come up with a lie I could say that they would believe. “I—we—may have seen one. But—”

“At the arcade back in High School,” Hazel confirms what I obviously didn’t want her to confirm. “We saw one as we were escaping that alien Sultan that almost killed me.”

‘Haze, shut up!’ I want to say, but instead I say to correct her on instinct, “Sontaran.”

Hazel nods and continues, despite my protests. “Right. It just appeared out of nowhere—the blue box. It had never appeared there before.”

Finally, I manage to come up with a believable lie. “But that was a long time ago,” I say mostly toward Hazel, hoping she’d finally get the hint to stop talking before we’re both dead. “We hardly remember it. We just saw it briefly as we were driving out of the parking lot, but that was it. We never saw it again.” Of course, I say all this like the experience was simply a bad dream and nothing more—at least, I want Billy and Brody to believe that, even though it’s clear that they don’t. Of course, I continue to further convince them, “And besides, we don’t even know if the blue box was real. For all we know, it could’ve just been a hallucination. I mean, we did just barely escape death at the time; people sometimes hallucinate things during times of trauma. Or, a police officer may have simply set it up there as a way of keeping an eye on the surrounding area, like back in the olden days when police boxes were everywhere, at least here in the UK. Perhaps the Police Department decided to bring the old police boxes back as a way of commemorating the old times when they were used more frequently. I don’t know. The point is, that box couldn’t have been the ‘magic’ one that you’re talking about.” Of course, it is the TARDIS that they’re talking about, but I don’t show that I know this. “And anyway, how do you know this ‘appearing-and-disappearing blue box’ is actually real? I mean, no one’s, like, captured it appearing and disappearing on camera or anything and posted it on the Internet. Is there even any proof that it’s real?”

I remember my father mentioning that he had purposefully deleted himself from every single database in the universe to hide from the Silence and make everyone believe he was dead after the events at Lake Silencio (which would explain why all the photos disappeared from Clive’s website when I attempted to show Hazel on her computer that morning in High School), so I figure Billy wouldn’t be able to find anything anywhere about him even if he tried. Unless he found my folder with all the info printed out from Clive’s website, which I have stashed away in a secret compartment in my suitcase; I’m honestly still wondering what made me feel the need to bring it home with me, at the time sensing that I’d share it with someone else one day while I’m back, but I seriously doubt it’s Billy I’d be sharing it with.

“Of course there is,” Billy says. “There are articles and things everywhere about it. Mother told us about a church in Chiswick that has a small blue box depicted in one of the stain-glass windows, and that same church used to be a monastery back in the 1300s that was attacked by an otherworldly ‘demon’ one day, and a so-called ‘sainted physician’ came in a magical blue box and purged the demon. There are other accounts of the same blue box appearing in times of terror, but there’s always a man that comes with it who is allegedly its owner.” Of course, the word ‘man’ automatically makes me think of my father. “Some say he’s a demon himself. Others say he’s a god—” Here he says the word ‘god’ like it tastes bad on his tongue. “—and that he takes many forms; yet somehow people recognize him as the same man despite having a different face. Others claim he’s from another world entirely.”

I glance at Hazel again, feigning amazement. “Wow. A ‘sainted physician’, huh? And everyone thinks this guy’s an alien? Or a god? Or an alien god?”

“Or a killer!” Brody growls at me, seemingly remembering the other night in the park and seems to feel the need to kill me; that, or he’s referring to an event that happened with my father a very long time ago. At this moment when I glance at him—admittedly, he’d startled me a bit on the word ‘killer’—I swear I see a glint of sharp fangs. Vampire fangs.

I instantly hear Brody wince in pain after being roughly kicked in the shin my his brother, who hisses under his breath (though I’m pretty sure he meant for me not to hear), “Peace, brother. Not yet.”

I frown, wondering what he means by ‘not yet’, even though I’m fairly certain he means ‘not yet’ as in ‘it’s not time to kill her yet’—‘her’ being me—which makes me feel disturbed to think that the longer we sit here, the more anxious Brody feels to eat my flesh rather than the cooked meat that he ordered.

Surprisingly, Hazel seems just as disturbed as me as she asks him nervously, “Uh… Are you alright?”

“Ah, he’s fine, babe,” Billy assures her as he rubs her arm. “Don’t mind him; he’s just hungry.”

I catch Billy give Brody a look as if to say ‘Dude, chill; you almost blew our cover!’, and when I glance toward Brody, I see him sit back and his fangs revert back to normal, which, of course, Hazel totally misses. The fact that Brody was so close to outright attacking me in front of everybody has greatly increased my eagerness to end the date, as it’s also increased my sense of danger.

Thankfully, our waitress unknowingly saves our lives by returning with our meals a few seconds later.

“Ah, here’s our food now!” Billy says excitedly.

“Thank god,” Hazel sighs in relief. “I was wondering when it would show up. I’m starving too.”

I sigh too, feeling just as relieved for the food to have arrived when it did, but for a slightly different reason. Of course, if it was delayed a few seconds longer, I get the feeling that Brody would’ve just gone ahead and begun eating my flesh instead, and I’m extremely thankful that that didn’t happen (again).

“Enjoy your meals,” the waitress says after she sets each of our plates in front of us. We thank her before she rushes off once more.

As everyone else immediately begins ravaging their meals, I begin eating mine with less enthusiasm, even though I’ve totally lost my appetite, especially seeing the way Billy and Brody gnaw through their steaks like rabid dogs. There are even several moments when I see small glints of sharp fangs biting into the meat, and I can’t help but envision my own severed neck, as well as Hazel’s, in place of the steaks. I steal a sideways glance at Brody and catch him looking at me like he would prefer that exact scenario himself, which automatically makes me think to myself: Hell, no! No way that’s happening again! I certainly can’t imagine that happening to Hazel either. I’m honestly surprised that Billy hasn’t been doing that to her anyway while I’ve been gone; though, again, I feel like Hazel would’ve told me about this behavior the instant I returned, and the fact that she hasn’t tells me that she truly doesn’t know anything about him being an alien vampire, which ups my desire to tell her.

“How’s your burger, babe?” Billy asks his girlfriend casually with a mouthful of steak.

“Awesome!” Hazel belches in satisfaction. “How’s your steak?”

“Bloody,” he smirks with steak juice dribbling down his chin, though to me it looks almost like fresh blood from a corpse. “Just the way I like it.”

I can’t help but automatically snort at the total irony of his comment, though my smirk instantly drops when I catch Billy glance up at me as if to say, ‘Yeah, that’s right, you heard me. You’re next once I’m done’, which makes me flinch in terror, but I don’t show it. Of course, his comment goes completely over Hazel’s head, who takes another greedy bite of her burger and spreads ketchup across her face in the process.

“What’s wrong, Nov—Syd?” Hazel asks me with concern after she swallows her giant bite of burger. “You’ve hardly touched your food. Do you not like it?”

I pause and lie, “No, it’s not that. I’m just…not as hungry as I thought.” Technically it wasn’t a total lie, as I’ve legitimately lost my appetite. How can I enjoy my own meal after seeing the way the boys eat their steaks like how I imagine how they ate the corpse of that poor homeless man in the abandoned building? Who knows how many other poor souls they’ve ravaged in the same manner over the past six months, maybe longer. So many people I could’ve saved if I was here…

She nods and raises a suspicious eyebrow at me, clearly sensing that I am, indeed, lying. Rather than call me out on it, she murmurs instead, “Also, you have that face on again. That face you get when you sense something’s wrong or ‘alien’. You know that face makes me nervous.”

All the more reason you’d make a terrible companion, I can’t help but immediately think in my head. Instead, I say out loud as I shake my head more vigorously and smile innocently, “Nothing’s wrong, Haze. I’m fine, honestly. There’s nothing to worry about.” I stab a piece of broccoli, eat it, and shrug to prove my case.

“What’s wrong? Really?” Brody glares at me, also sensing I’m lying.

I have to fight myself not to say, ‘You. You and your brother are what’s wrong’. Instead, I repeat, “Nothing! Seriously!” I glance at Billy and see him glaring at me in the same way, and I shrug again and attempt to explain, “I’m just not—”

I am interrupted when Hazel suddenly yelps in pain and drops the knife she was using to cut her burger, which clatters noisily onto her plate.

“Haze!” I cry on instinct. “What’s wrong?”

“I just cut myself,” she grunts as she raises her left hand.

“Babe, you’re bleeding,” Billy points out as he reaches out to inspect the small cut on Hazel’s hand.

I glance at Brody again, and a massive shiver runs down my spine. Upon seeing the blood on Hazel’s hand, he immediately closes his eyes and inhales deeply, and his eyes go bloodshot momentarily, like how someone who had inhaled a strong drug would react. Another glance back at Billy, and he instinctively does the same thing.

Fudgeknuckle! This isn’t good.

“Haze, we need to go!” I immediately speak up, my sense of danger heightening, as I attempt to get up from the booth, but I end up cursing myself for forgetting that I’m trapped against the wall, as is Hazel. Since there’s nothing else I can do, I look down at my ‘date’ and ask as politely as I can muster, “Brody, can you please move?”

“Where’re you going?” Brody growls, refusing to get up. “You can’t leave.”

“Why? It’s not that bad,” Hazel says at the same time as she tries using her napkin to clean the blood off her hand, but that’s not going to be enough. Not by a longshot.

“Looks bad to me. Let me see it. Maybe I can help,” Billy says as he attempts to grab Hazel’s hand again, but she moves her arm away, even when he tries forcing her arm back towards him.

“No, Billy, I can help her. Brody, please move; I need to get up. Haze, you too; come with me.” I say this as I try physically pushing Brody off the booth, but he doesn’t budge.

“You’re not going anywhere,” Brody says as he stays in the spot, this time baring his vampire fangs at me. “Neither of you are going anywhere!” He says this last bit in a yell, bringing unwanted attention to us from the other diners.

At this point, I’ve had enough, not even caring about anything besides getting Hazel to safety, far away from the boys. “Brody, move now! Haze, seriously, you need to come with me right now!” At this point, I’m prepared to literally shove Brody’s sumo-wrestler body off the booth and onto the floor and yank Billy off the opposite booth to get at Hazel.

However, thankfully I don’t have to go that far when the manager of the restaurant comes over and asks in a stern and intimidating voice, “Excuse me, is there a problem over here?” Another waitress stands close by with her phone up as though ready to call the police if things get any worse than they already are. In all honesty, a part of me hopes she goes ahead and calls them anyway just to force the boys away from us. A few other diners have their phones out as well, likely filming the scene to see how far it goes.

We all pause upon seeing the manager. I speak up as I force myself to calm down, even though both hearts are racing a million beats per minute. “No, sir, there’s no problem,” I try to say as confidently as I can muster, even when my voice is shaky to my own ears. “I was just getting up to help my friend. She accidentally cut herself, and I was just going to take her to the bathroom to help her clean her cut.” As I say this, I nudge Brody who finally gets up to allow me to get up (though he is very reluctant to do so even with the manager present), and Billy does the same for Hazel, though Billy is more calm about it. A part of me also thinks about warning the diners and manager about Billy and Brody being dangerous alien vampires, but I ultimately choose not to, knowing no one would believe me.

“Do I need to call an ambulance for you?” the manager asks Hazel.

Before anyone can answer, I answer for her, saying as I pull her away, “No, it’s fine. We’ll just wash it and put a band-aid on it. We appreciate the concern, though, but I think we’re good. Come on, Haze.” I pull her away from the scene and toward the ladies’ restroom. I take a quick glance behind me at Billy and Brody, and I catch their murderous stares that clearly say, ‘this isn’t over yet’, which sends another shudder up my spine.

As we head toward the bathroom, I chastise myself for causing such a commotion. I remember Dad teaching me to try to keep most alien events secret—i.e. away from the general public to prevent a mass panic, as well as save as many lives as possible. I think back to how desperate I felt to warn everyone about Billy and Brody, at the time believing I could save their lives in case the vampires felt like attacking them for no reason other than to quench their never-ending thirst for blood. I’m sure Dad would be disappointed in me for having possibly blown my cover in front of Billy and Brody, believing that the commotion I caused may have increased their suspicions of me, as well as putting Hazel in even more danger. And for making a complete fool of myself on Social Media without really meaning to; no doubt those who filmed the whole thing will post it everywhere for all the world to see.

Not exactly off to a great start as ‘the next Doctor’. Wouldn’t be surprised if I end up being the worst ‘Doctor’ in the universe after Dad passes.

“What the hell was all that about?” Hazel immediately begins ranting the instant we enter the ladies’ restroom. “What is with you today? You’ve been acting super weird since we left the apartment! What is going on?!”

As she says all of this, I rush around the room, checking every stall to make sure we’re completely alone. “Haze, I’m sorry!” I say once she stops ranting. “I had to get you away from them!”

“From ‘them’?” she frowns. “From who? Billy and Brody? Why? They just wanted to help! Why didn’t you want them to? Why don’t you trust them?”

“Because I don’t!” I admit without really meaning to.

“Why?” she demands.

“Because they’re v—” I start to say but suddenly catch myself and immediately stop. Instead, I say, “There’s…something about them that I don’t trust. I…don’t know why. I can’t explain it. I just don’t trust them with you.” Or with anyone, I add in my head.

“Is this one of those stupid ‘Time Lord things’ that you can’t explain?” she scoffs in annoyance. “Rather, something that you won’t explain?”

“Ssh!” I snap at her before whispering, “Maybe. I don’t know. It doesn’t matter. Right now I need to heal your cut. Give me your hand.”

“Why do you always have to use your energy on everything?” Hazel grunts as she pulls her hand away, clearly knowing what I’m about to do. “Honestly, it’s just a cut; it’s not even that deep. As you said, I’ll just wash it and put a band-aid on it. It’s not a big deal. Why do you insist on making it such a big deal?” She turns on the faucet in one of the sinks in preparation to wash her bloody hand.

I groan, pulling her hand away from the running water. “Haze, please, just let me heal your cut. It’s not safe for you to bleed out. Not in front of them.” Again, I don’t mean to say this last bit, but I felt the need to say it anyway.

“I doubt they’re bothered by the sight of a little blood,” she says, rolling her eyes. “Billy wasn’t; he was just concerned—”

“Haze, shut up and let me do this,” I snap at her. “Please.”

She starts protesting and tries yanking her hand away again, but I ignore her as I grip her wrist tighter and will my Regeneration Energy to appear and heal her cut. Hazel immediately stops complaining once she sees my energy and is seemingly hypnotized by it as she watches it mend the wound with amazement.

“There,” I say after the wound is fully healed, and I make my hands stop glowing. “Now you can wash it and put a band-aid on it.”

“Don’t need to put a band-aid on it now, do I?” she grumbles under her breath as she washes the leftover blood in the sink.

“You should still put one on anyway,” I insist. “You know…in case they get suspicious. They can’t know—”

“They can’t know about your secret,” she sighs as she finishes drying her hands. “I know. Geez, when’re you gonna stop saying that? You got that band-aid or not?” After I hand her a band-aid and she wraps it around where the cut used to be, she growls again, “Let’s go back,” and exits the bathroom, and I follow close behind.

In all honesty, I feel somewhat calmer now after healing her cut with my energy, but I still feel nervous to return to the boys, still fearing that I’d blown my cover as a legitimate human, and they may interrogate me further as a result.

Thankfully—or unfortunately, depending on your perspective—the boys are still at the table, right where we left them. “Babe!” Billy calls to Hazel when he sees us. “Are you okay? What happened?”

“I’m fine,” she smiles as she raises her hand to show them. “Look, I got a band-aid. Everything’s cool now.” She seats herself back on the booth, this time sitting on the outside.

Meanwhile, I gesture for Brody to scoot over, this time forcing him to so I can sit on the outside as well. I catch a few diners from other tables looking at us still with their phones out as if expecting another commotion, but I simply shoot them a ‘Sorry, show’s over; as you were’ look and turn away.

As he hands Hazel back her purse, Billy glances between us, sensing the tension between us. “You sure?” he asks. “You guys look…like you just had an argument.”

Hazel glances uneasily at me before shaking her head. “We…did. But it doesn’t matter now.”

As Hazel changes the subject by asking the boys if they’ve ordered the check, and while I poke into my mashed potatoes with my fork for hidden razorblades, I suddenly get that familiar sense I got at the abandoned building last night—the sense that another Time Lord is around. I glance over toward the opposite side of the restaurant and see another waitress with familiar long blonde hair glumly cleaning tables. I see the girl momentarily pause as if she senses the exact same thing, and she looks up toward my direction. When our eyes lock with one another, my senses heighten as if to say ‘Ding-ding! You found her!’; more than that, I instantly recognize the girl to be the same girl from the abandoned building.

Upon seemingly instantly recognizing me, the girl once again flees the area and toward the kitchens in the back of the restaurant, and I immediately get up from the table and chase after her, determined not to let her get away this time. I ignore Hazel’s yells as I continue chasing the girl through the kitchens, but I end up getting stuck behind a cart as a chef is pushing it across my path. I manage to swerve around him and through the chaos and eventually reach the back door where the girl escaped through. Once I exit the door and out into the cold night, I am too late, as the girl seems to have eluded me once again.

Damn, she’s a slippery one, I think to myself, cursing shortly thereafter.

Before I think of what to do next, a firm hand abruptly grips my wrist, immediately followed by a gruff voice demanding, “Where do you think you’re going?” Startled, I turn to see Brody standing there, having followed me, his meaty hand gripping my wrist so tight that I can feel my bones crushing underneath.

“Nov, what the hell?!” Hazel exclaims, rushing to catch up with Billy close behind. “Why’d you run off?”

“She was trying to escape,” Brody confirms, squeezing my wrist even tighter on the word ‘escape’, making me wince slightly.

“I wasn’t,” I insist as I try to pull my arm away. “Let go; you’re hurting me!”

“And let you run off again?” Brody chuckles like this is all a game, refusing to let me go. “Don’t think so, Time Lord.”

I instantly pause. “Excuse me?!”

Did he really just call me that?! He totally did! So they do know what I am. Of course they do. I thought as much. No surprise there.

“Brody!” Billy gasps at his brother, seemingly appalled that he revealed that secret out loud for me to find out. “Let her go!”

Thankfully, Brody does, and I instantly massage my wrist while fighting back the Regeneration Energy that wants to heal the bones, but of course I don’t let it…yet.

“She’s not going to run off again…are you?” Billy asks me suspiciously, saying it in a way that there is no longer any point in hiding what his idiot brother had stupidly revealed.

“No!” I snap back at him while struggling to ignore the pain. “I just…thought I saw someone I recognized.”

“And they got away?” Billy frowns as if wanting to know who the person was. Not that I would tell him even if I knew.

I shrug. “Yeah. It doesn’t matter now. Anyway, I’m getting tired, and it’s getting close to curfew. I’m gonna head back to the apartment. It was…nice spending time with you guys tonight.” Even though I learned absolutely nothing about you guys, I add in my head, well, apart from knowing I’m a Time Lord. “We should do it again sometime,” I smile as I begin walking toward the apartment, even though I actually don’t truly mean what I said. “See ya round.”

“I’m going with you,” Hazel insists as she steps toward me. “It’s not safe to wander the city by yourself.” She says this as if she remembers that time when I left the apartment and came back later that night covered in blood and barely alive. Of course, she doesn’t plan on letting me out of her sight at night again after that, and she certainly won’t let me do anything ‘Time Lord’ alone again either, even though I have to disagree with her there. Nonetheless, she insists on following me home anyway.

Then again, rather she be with me than alone with the boys; of course, I truly meant what I said about not trusting her to be around them, especially now that I know that they know the truth about me. “Fine,” I sigh, reluctantly agreeing with Hazel. “Let’s go.”

“Goodnight, babe!” Hazel gives Billy one last quick peck on the cheek. “I’ll text you later!”

I hear Billy say something about wanting to meet us again after our first day of classes on Monday, but I don’t pay much attention, feeling anxious to get away from the world for a little while; that date really stressed me out more than it should’ve.

“Nov, wait up!” she calls to me as she runs to catch up.

I ignore her as I keep walking silently, hoping I’d be left alone, even though I can sense her anxiousness to know why I’ve been acting so ‘weird’ all night, which is, of course, a topic I can’t share with her.

“Well, that was an interesting date,” she speaks up after a minute, and she says it in a way like she’s hoping I’d take the hint that she wants to know the truth, but, of course, I remain silent.

“You left your coat back at the restaurant, by the way,” she speaks up again as she lifts up my coat and hands it back to me—honestly, I forgot all about it because of all the craziness—and I take it without saying a word. “You’re welcome,” she grumbles in response.

We both remain silent for another whole minute, and at this point I can sense Hazel getting really annoyed with my refusing to say anything about my behavior.

Eventually she snaps, having enough. “Okay, seriously, Nov; you gonna tell me what’s really going on with you? Why you’ve been acting so secretive since you got home? Why you act the way you have around Billy and Brody? Honestly, Nova, they’re just trying to be nice. They’re just normal people. Well, Brody was a little weird. He seemed very…possessive of you, which was super creepy if you ask me, especially on a first date. Don’t know if I want him to go on the next on—”

At this point, I’ve had enough too. “I’m fine, Haze. Really. I’m just…tired.” I sigh, hoping she’d just accept what I said and move on, even when it’s not the truth.

Of course, Hazel knows that’s not the truth. “You and I both know that’s a lie. Come on, what’s going on? Really? You say you ‘can’t explain it’ but I bet you can, but you just don’t want to. Even if it’s ‘a Time Lord thing’, why don’t you want to explain it? Are you trying to protect me from something? Even so, maybe I can hel—”

“YES!” I automatically answer her question as to whether I’m protecting her, hence my secrecy from her. Nonetheless, I still feel the need to keep everything a secret, so I say with a groan, “I mean, maybe. It’s complicated. That’s why I can’t explain it. And no, you can’t help me. You wouldn’t understand. You would never understand.”

Even if I did tell Hazel the truth, of course she’d want to help me, but I swore I’d keep her out of everything I do because things have become much too dangerous.

Regardless, Hazel still seems determined to help me, no matter how dangerous things have become; this has always been our sacred oath, after all…at least, it used to be. “Well…maybe if you tried talking to me, maybe I ca—”

“I can’t!” I snap at her without really meaning to, but at the same time I did mean to. “I swore I wouldn’t let you get involved in anything I do ever again! It’s too dangerous!” As much as I want to tell her she may already be involved in something, I refrain from saying it, honestly feeling too afraid and guilty to.

“But I want to help—”

“Haze, stop!” I exclaim, turning to her and gripping her shoulders tightly to make her listen. “You can’t help me! I told you, I have a responsibility—a fixed destiny! I can’t unwrite myself from it, and I can’t let you be a part of it! As much as I want you to be a part of it—as much as I want you to understand—you can’t! You just can’t! I have to do it alone! Anytime I accept someone’s offer to help, they end up paying the price, and it’s my fault! I can’t let that happen to you! Not again! I’m sorry!”

I pause a few seconds and sigh heavily, regretting what I am going to say next, knowing how much it will hurt Hazel, but I feel the need to say it anyway. “In fact, I should never have come home at all. I should’ve stayed gone. Dad says I’m safer in the TARDIS anyway. I should never have asked to come back.”

Everywhere I go, death and destruction always follow. As Dad recently taught me, that’s the curse of the Time Lords, and it’s one that will stick with me for the rest of my life—not just this life, but all the lives that will follow should I live past this one. This is why Time Lords don’t settle, don’t have families; the people they meet end up being a part of the curse as well, and it ends up killing them. If Hazel becomes a part of it, even when she may already be a part of it…

Of course, I can see how much my words have hurt her. She remains silent for a whole minute before she eventually sighs and admits, “Maybe you’re right. Maybe you should’ve stayed gone. If you think you’re that dangerous now… If you think you don’t need your friends anymore… If you don’t need me anymore…” She pauses as she chokes on her last words. “If you really believe that now… Maybe you should just leave. Leave and never come back. Leave and forget me. Forget everything. Maybe it would be better for both of us.” She then turns and starts walking away with tears in her eyes.

“Haze, I—” I attempt to protest.

But she doesn’t want to hear it. “Don’t! If you’re going to leave, just leave! Just—” She pauses again as though she planned to say more, but she abruptly stops herself as if thinking she’d step too far across the line with whatever she was going to say. Instead, she says softly, “Forget it. Just forget it! I’m done!” before she turns fully and runs off without another word, leaving me totally speechless.

As much as I want to change my mind and say I actually didn’t mean all the things I said, I don’t say a word, believing it truly is for the best if we part ways, as I watch my former best friend rush off, feeling absolutely heartbroken.

In all honesty, I knew our time would end around this point. I knew that once I came more into my powers, my life would become far too dangerous for anyone (aside from my bio-parents) to be a part of, and that Hazel would no longer be safe to remain a part of it. Of course, Dad deals with this sort of thing all the time with past companions he takes on, and a large part of me hoped my time with Hazel would last much longer. Admittedly, I’m surprised my friendship with Hazel lasted this long, which is much longer than most other companions Dad has traveled with. I suppose, eventually, all times come to an end, and most of the time it’s for the best. Back then, I just never thought it would ever happen to me…until now. I guess that’s another part of the ‘curse’ I’ll have to deal with from now on.

I wait for Hazel to get a far enough head-start before I choose to follow her. I walk only a few steps before I stop, suddenly sensing that I am being watched. I glance behind me and see Billy?—no, Brody standing half-inside a side alley, smirking at me from around the corner as if to say, ‘Heh, you’ve just lost your best and only friend. Now you’re weak without her’; and, in all honesty, I do feel weak without her now. She’d been my best friend since the First Grade, and I just had to end it because of how dangerous and complicated my life has become. It’s impossible for her to remain a part of it any longer; in fact, it probably should never have happened to begin with.

Once he sees me looking at him, and once he senses that I’ve gotten the message, Brody slips back behind the corner, and when I attempt to run after him, he’s, of course, completely gone. Typical.

Since there’s no point for me to rush after him now, while failing to hold back tears, I simply turn on my heel and start walking back to the apartment, now feeling a gaping hole in my soul with Hazel no longer there to fill it.