Work Text:
There are few things Kim Rok Soo could call his own, among them were his name and his body. Now he didn't have either of those two, but he had gotten others, a family even.
The thing is, he wasn't ready to let go of his name yet, it had been the one thing that no one managed to damage no matter how hard they tried.
Kim Rok Soo was Kim Rok Soo, all his papers said the same thing; when people had no other choice, that was the name they would call him by; and when someone compared him to either of his parents, it would be the name they had given him that they would eventually say.
But now, being Cale Henituse, no one would say his name.
There is reason, it's not a name in that world, it doesn't mean anything, and if by some chance someone did say it, they wouldn't be referring to him at all.
“Huh?” The small wet spot that had just appeared on the page of the book was what brought him out of his reverie, a trembling hand confirms his suspicions, were his tears that wet the paper.
His first instinct is to wipe his face with his shirt sleeve, but no matter how many times he does it, the tears keep coming one after another.
“This is so annoying.” His voice comes out in whispers as he pushes the book away, not wanting to get it any wetter, so he can try to stop the crying in peace.
After a few erratic breaths, they finally stop.
Still, he doesn't take his hands away from his face.
He had never felt bad being Cale, he himself had agreed to bear that name as his own, but he never felt the desire to think about his identity either.
Doing so doesn't feel good.
He can't contain the laughter that comes out of him, it's such a silly thing to do, he's an adult now, it shouldn't affect him like it did when he was a teenager clinging to something immaterial to feel like he had some control over his life.
He picks up the book again, no longer afraid to keep wetting the pages full of little notations and marks, and the pencil he had been using only seconds before the disaster. He's going to do something a little silly, and perhaps more risky than he'd like if in the future he decides not to tell them anything about his past life, but that's a problem for tomorrow's him.
He turns it over and turns a few pages before stopping, hesitates just a moment and begins to write, his handwriting that sloppy, some letters larger and some smaller, a clear sign that this body is not used to writing in Korean.
Seeing
his name again, he feels a little lighter.