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Chapter Text

Post war, the Kage summits have become something more enjoyable to Gaara than they were previously.

Instead of discussing the dire need to save the people of their lands and bring them together to fight their enemy, a different focus took its place.

The Kage summits were now more about innovation—sharing ideas, inspiration, and better yet, hope for the future.

It was also on such summits that Gaara had the opportunity to see some of his favorite people, chief among them, Temari, and her husband of course, and the family they were starting, as well as Naruto and Hinata.

They were often too busy to meet these days, with young Shikadai and Boruto taking most of their family's time when they weren't busy working.

And because Gaara has seen less of Naruto, and less of Temari when he visits Konoha, he's spent more time with another, someone he's admired his entire life though his place in his own was always in the background.

Lord Sixth.

Although the Kage often are informal with one another and are on a first name basis, it feels strange to refer to Kakashi so casually.

Perhaps because he holds him in the highest regard.

Gaara's been around other Kage most of his life and he's been groomed for the position and lifestyle, but Kakashi seems the most worthy of the title of all those he's met.

When Kakashi was inaugurated as Hokage, Gaara recalled a sense of satisfaction, or relief. You're finally here with me.

Now, Gaara is waiting in Konoha's library after the events of today's summit, for the Hokage. Kakashi had agreed to meet him under the thinly disguised veil of researching water recycling techniques to the benefit of both Konoha and Suna.

When Gaara told Kankuro of his plans, he had laughed.

"Just ask him out, why don't you?" Kankuro had said.

"Wait…why would I do that?" Gaara had asked.

Kankuro hadn't given him a straight answer, and instead chuckled at his clueless younger brother as he went off to enjoy Konoha's bustling nightlife.

Now, Gaara gets his answer, whether he understands it or not.

When Kakashi enters the library, Gaara catches sight of him in the large doorway. Kakashi finds him almost immediately and gives a quick lazy wave, and Gaara's heart pounds in his ears.

Kakashi walks towards him with slow strides and hands in his pockets.

"Gaara," he says warmly, eyes squinting in a smile. "It's always good to see you."

He grips Gaara's shoulder, giving it a brief squeeze, before sitting opposite of him.

The touch electrifies the Kazekage. He loses all train of thought, all the topics and points of discussion he prepared for this meeting are now lost. He looks at Kakashi blankly.

Kakashi picks up on his cues and steers the conversation. "Exhausting day today, hmm?"

"A little. Onoki and A's bickering was tiresome."

Kakashi chuckles and leans back in his seat, crossing one leg over his knee. "It seems we won't have to worry about that for much longer. Lady Kurotsuchi will be succeeding Onoki soon, after all."

Gaara nods. "Her leadership skills and skills as a shinobi are formidable." It's all he's willing to say on the matter presently.

"It's a wonder you've been able to keep your composure with them for so long," Kakashi says, eyes still squinting.

It's a compliment, Gaara realizes. He gives Kakashi a small smile. "It's been challenging, but I've held my own."

"They respect you. It must not have been easy, being so young."

"I hear that you underwent the same trials at ANBU," Gaara replies. "You were also very young."

"Yes, I was," Kakashi admits. "Hmm. That's interesting."

"What is?" Gaara asks, fully focused on the Hokage before him.

"I'll tell you later."

With that, Kakashi is up on his feet, walking into the yawning rows and rows of bookcases. "Are you coming?" Kakashi asks from over his shoulder.

Gaara is up and following after him. Once he catches up the two Kage are busy sifting through books. Gaara is energized with the purpose of his task, and Kakashi helps, pulling books down while he quickly skims them from his perch high on a ladder.

"There's a lot in this one about irrigation," Kakashi murmurs, keeping his voice low in the library. "But we've gathered quite a few books already."

"I'll take it," Gaara replies, walking toward the ladder after closing another book in his hands.

Kakashi lowers the book and Gaara takes it from him with a slow, deliberate movement. Kakashi's fingers brush along Gaara's own as the book is handed off.

Gaara feels the touch linger against his skin, causing the fine hairs on his neck to stand on end, but he says nothing about it. He instead opens the book and skims its contents, still standing beside the ladder.

"Very interesting," Kakashi hums to himself.

Gaara's head snaps up from the book. "What is?"

"You," Kakashi replies, nose deep in another book, casually flipping through its pages.

Gaara feels the heat rise to his cheeks and the tips of his ears. He closes the book in his hand and tucks it under his arm with the other he is carrying, then looks up at Kakashi on the ladder.

"Why am I interesting?" Gaara asks.

"Why wouldn't you be?" Kakashi muses, looking down his mask at the younger man.

Gaara doesn't know what to say. He stares up at Kakashi with a curious tilt of his head.

"Why did you ask me to come to the library with you?" Kakashi asks. "I know very little about the information you seek. Lady Mei or Chojuro seem better able to discuss hydro engineering with you."

Gaara blinks. Kankuro's words from earlier echo in his mind.

"Don't get me wrong, Gaara. I am happy to help you in any way you think I can assist. But this is not my particular strength, and I know you to be a man that controls his assets with thorough planning and calculation. So I wonder, where do I fit in your calculations, hmm?"

Gaara remains silent, staring up the ladder somewhere behind the Hokage.

Kakashi lowers his book and gazes at Gaara with eyes that never miss a thing, even without his Sharingan.

"You have tells, Gaara, that are easy to read."

Gaara crosses his arms, the books he holds press to his ribs. "Is that so?" he manages in his most unaffected tone.

"Yes. I'd be happy to tell you about them, whenever you're ready to hear them."

"I am ready."

"No, I don't think you are. Not yet."

Kakashi climbs down the ladder, ruffling Gaara's hair affectionately as he does so.

"I'll be here, though, when you are ready," Kakashi says, placing his hands in his pockets. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have somewhere I must be."

Gaara does his best to hide his disappointment. "Of course, Lord Kakashi."

Kakashi winces at the title. "Maa. Please don't call me that."

"Sorry, Kakashi."

Kakashi winces again.

"There's nothing to be sorry for. But I'll be here for you, next time, however I may fit into your calculations. Just be honest with me about what you really need, won't you?"

Gaara watches as Kakashi walks out of sight, and wonders what it was Kakashi saw about him that made him leave.

Gaara returns to his books, his excitement for the task now completely deflated. He forces himself to read, attempting to drown out the negative thoughts that try to creep into his mind like dark weedy tendrils.

Chapter Text

Six months later another summit is held in Konoha.

Gaara still often thinks about what Kakashi said to him during their last encounter at the library.

He still isn't sure what he meant.

It seems, however, he won't have much time to visit with Kakashi this time. Temari and Shikamaru have invited him and Kankuro over for dinner.

He is very much looking forward to spending time with his family and baby Shikadai, but he is disappointed to not see Kakashi. The Hokage has certainly been on the forefront of his mind lately, and his breath catches whenever their eyes meet.

For instance, during their morning session, his stomach had flipped when Kakashi's voice had lowered, silky and soft, asking, "What does Lord Gaara think about this matter, I wonder?" dark eyes meeting his own surprised jade.

Gaara had quickly recovered and given a plausible answer, but once the matter was addressed, he stopped paying attention to the conversation until it was time for a break, dreamily lost in his own thoughts.

Now, Gaara hangs back in the Hokage's office, hoping to have a brief moment with him alone before their afternoon session.

"Gaara, as much as I enjoy your company, I do have many things to get through during my lunch," Kakashi says as gently as possible.

"Yes, I understand," Gaara says with a blank expression.

"Are you available this evening?" Kakashi asks, and Gaara feels himself brighten, though he remembers he has obligations.

"I'm afraid not. Kankuro and I have plans with the family."

"Actually, Gaara, change of plans," Kankuro says, poking in his head from the doorway.

How long has he been there listening?

"What?" Gaara asks.

"Temari just told me that something came up, and they need a babysitter," Kankuro says, smirking. "They wondered if you could watch Shikadai. You're more responsible than me, afterall."

"Oh, how interesting," Kakashi says, leaning back in his chair with his hands resting behind his head.

Gaara gazes down at him, waiting for him to elaborate. When he doesn't, Gaara asks, "It is?"

"Yea. I am babysitting Boruto tonight. Have you met him yet?"

Gaara nods. "Only once."

"Well, if Temari and Shikamaru are alright with it, I don't see why we can't have our own plans while watching the babies?"

"Temari won't have a problem," the master puppeteer says quickly.

Kakashi regards Kankuro thoughtfully for a moment, before giving him a curt nod.

"So, what will it be, Gaara? Shall I bring Boruto to you?"

"I…I would like that," Gaara agrees, face quickly warming.

"Good, I look forward to it then," Kakashi replies with his crinkling eyes. Gaara can't help but notice how his scarred eyelid dimples when he smiles, and he finds it quite unique. He likes it.

Gaara dismisses himself and files out of the office to walk beside his smirking brother. "What?" Gaara asks him.

"Oh, it's nothing," Kankuro replies with a cunning smile.

The rest of the summit goes painfully slowly, in Gaara's opinion, when he realizes he and Kakashi will be alone with not one, but two babies, and he himself barely has any experience with babies.

His normally steady nerves are wrecked.

When he goes to Temari and Shikamaru's apartment they greet him eagerly.

"Do you think he's going to be okay with our son?" Shikamaru whispers under his breath to his wife when Gaara awkwardly accepts Shikadai from Temari's arms.

"He'll be fine," she hisses back at him. "He needs this."

"Whatever you say," Shikamaru replies. He's learned it's never worth the fight with her, even when she is wrong. But he suspects she may be right about this. This opportunity is too good not to let go to waste.

"Good luck, Gaara," Shikamaru says with a sympathetic wave.

"You got this!" Temari beams, while Shikadai begins to cry in Gaara's arms, holding his arms out for his mom.

"It's okay sweetie, Mommy and Daddy will be back in a few hours," Temari coos at Shikadai and kisses his hairy head.

The parents are out the door quickly, and Gaara is left with the nine month old baby, wondering about his choices that led him here with a crying infant in his arms.

"Shhh, shhh, everything will be alright," Gaara says in a calm, low voice. He lifts Shikadai more comfortably in his arms as the baby tries to squirm out of his grip.

"That's better. You're not going anywhere, little one."

Gaara settles in an armchair with Shikadai, quietly soothing him with kind words and it isn't long before the baby calms down, and stares at Gaara with bright green eyes that almost match his own. They certainly are Temari's eyes.

"There, see? Nothing to worry about," Gaara says, smiling down at him. Shikadai makes a sweet sound and grips Gaara's finger with his own little ones.

This is love Gaara thinks to himself.

Then there's a knock at the door.

Gaara rises to his feet, holding Shikadai against his hip as though it were the most natural thing in the world for him to do. Shikadai's feet push against his gourd and he realizes he never had a chance to remove his coat and waist belts.

He opens the door and smiles at the sight of Kakashi squinting a smile at him, with sweat on his brow, carrying a very squirmy whiskered baby and a pack-and-play over his shoulder along with a massive and colorful diaper bag, which most certainly is Hinata's.

"Please come in," Gaara says, holding the door for the Hokage, Boruto, and all his baby staging supplies.

"Wait a minute, wait a minute," Kakashi says, sounding quite fatigued already, and Gaara wonders how much of a trial it was for Kakashi to leave Naruto and Hinata's with the wily baby. By contrast, Shikadai is much more calm.

Kakashi sets Boruto down on the floor and he immediately is off crawling while Kakashi sets down his supplies.

"Where should I put the pack and play?" Kakashi asks, and Gaara points to a bare wall against the living room.

"I think that's your safest bet. We won't want to wake Shikadai taking that apart when it's time for us to leave."

"Smart thinking," Kakashi says, and gets to work on setting up.

Gaara watches Boruto crawl right into the kitchen, out of sight, and follows him. "Stay out of that," Gaara says, picking Boruto up in his other arm as the baby tries to get into a potted plant.

He'll have to have a word with Temari later about poisonous houseplants. To be fair, they hadn't had to worry about it yet as Shikadai has yet to crawl.

Kakashi is still in the process of putting the makeshift crib together when Gaara returns with two babies. Boruto reaches a hand out for Shikadai, and Shikadai puts Boruto's finger in his mouth.

"Instead of watching me, you might want to keep an eye on them," Kakashi says with amusement, wiping the sweat from his brow as the pack and play set up continues to thwart him.

"Oh. No. Don't do that," Gaara says, gently pulling Boruto's hand out of Shikadai's mouth.

Kakashi chuckles. Finally the crib snaps into place. "There. Now that that's finished…"

He doesn't have a chance to finish his sentence. One of the babies makes a gurgling sound.

Gaara's eyes go wide.

"Oh…oh, let me get you a burp cloth," Kakashi says, digging into the diaper bag he brought.

Gaara looks down to discover Boruto has puked up all over him.

He laughs.

Then Shikadai makes a sound, accompanied by a very foul smell.

Kakashi takes Boruto and hands Gaara a cloth. Gaara quickly wipes his jacket that he still has yet to remove.

"You're on your own for the diaper change," Kakashi says, but Gaara is still laughing at the absurdity of it all.

Kakashi is so out of place like this and yet…

He's right at home.

Despite being out of his element with babies, Gaara feels safe and warm and happy to be here.

"...What is it?" Kakashi asks, clearly unsure what to think of Gaara's uncharacteristic fit of laughter. Shikadai is wide-eyeing him too.

Gaara wipes a tear from his eye as he takes Shikadai to a changing station, assessing the situation. Diapers. Wipes. A belt clip on the changing table. A changing pad.

"Is this your first time changing a diaper?" Kakashi asks, and Gaara nods his head.

Bless him, Gaara gets right to work.

"Wait, no, Gaara—wait!"

But it's too late.

"Ahhhh!" Gaara screams in surprise.

"He…he peed on you, didn't he? Little boys do that. I didn't warn you fast enough. Boruto got me too, the first time I tried changing him."

Gaara is still laughing, though with a hint of manic desperation behind it.

"I have no idea what I'm doing, and yet, Temari still left me in charge."

"She was right to do so, wasn't she?"

Kakashi helps Gaara by holding his hand down on the squiggly baby's tummy. "I've got him, he's not going anywhere. Wipe, wipe some more, then roll the diaper up, and put a clean one underneath."

"It smells…disgusting."

"No worse than decomp. You can do this."

Kakashi's completely right, Gaara knows. They've survived terrible things. And the war, and Madara, and Kaguya? They survived that together.

Well, not entirely. Gaara realizes Kakashi is partly to thank for him still being alive, not wasting away in a cocoon as his life essence is transformed into chakra for the Otsutsuki woman.

Gaara holds his breath and gets to work, while Boruto squirms in Kakashi's other arm while he holds Shikadai firmly to the changing table. There's a fair amount of wipes used, and Gaara is certain if Kankuro was in his shoes right now he'd be retching.

Gaara is quite pleased with himself when Shikadai's bottom is clean and he's wearing a fresh diaper, secured snug but not too tight.

"Nicely done," Kakashi says, giving the Kazekage his approval and a brief smile before he's back to giving Boruto his full attention as he tries to wriggle free.

"No, no you don't, get back here!"

Boruto coos and fusses but ultimately Kakashi wins, and Boruto rests in his arms as Kakashi bounces him. Kakashi sighs and gives Gaara a long-suffering look.

"I'm so sorry I suggested this," Kakashi says. "And you…you might want to shower…if not at least change your clothes. I didn't want to say anything…but you're a mess."

"I'm having a good time, actually," Gaara says brightly, but he knows they've been into this for only twenty minutes and he's already exhausted, nevermind peed and puked on, and almost shit on. "It's much better than us doing this alone."

How do Temari and Shikamaru do this every day? Naruto and Hinata?

"If I shower, would you be okay to watch both of them?" Gaara asks uncertainly.

"Yeah, give him here. I'll be fine."

Gaara reluctantly hands Shikadai over to Lord Sixth, Hokage of the Hidden Leaf Village.

The title is only that, a title.

The man is so much more than that, Gaara thinks, watching him with both babies.

He's gentle, he's silly, he's soft, he's—

"Gaara? I thought you were going to shower? Quickly please!"

"Yes, I'll be quick."

Gaara does his best to be quick about it, but there's the matter of not knowing where the clean towels are, or having a set of clean clothes. He redresses in what is salvageable, then very uncomfortably raids Shikamaru's closet. He feels terrible for being in the private space of their bedroom, rooting through their closet and personal belongings.

Gaara finds a plain white shirt. It's good enough.

He comes out as fast as he can, hair wet and messy, afraid of what disaster the babies have gotten into.

"Took you long enough," Kakashi says, but Gaara recognizes a playful edge to his voice. He is sitting on a couch, with Shikadai in one arm and Boruto in the other. Both are drinking from bottles, and each baby is able to hold their own.

They suck and slurp greedily.

Gaara sits beside Kakashi, close, his knee to Kakashi's knee, and holds out his hands for Shikadai.

"Take him," Kakashi says. "I can't hand him off."

Gaara reaches for him instead, and carefully pulls him onto his lap as he sits cross-legged.

Shikadai whines but goes back to drinking from the bottle.

Gaara watches him fondly, staring at him in awe.

"They're wonderful, aren't they?" Kakashi asks him.

"They are. Though I'm not sure how their parents do this everyday."

"It's hard, I'm sure. But they aren't alone. They have us, and others that want to help. These two will be fine." Kakashi sighs. "It's other children I worry about."

Boruto still sucks at the nipple of his bottle that's nearly empty when he reaches a hand for a fistful of Kakashi's mask, and begins to pull and pull downward.

"Hey! Hey! That's enough of that!"

Kakashi gently unfurls Boruto's hands and frees the mask. He straightens it.

"That's disappointing," Gaara says with a sly grin.

"Hmm? Why's that?"

"I thought I might be the one who gets to see your face."

"You think so?"

"It was worth a try."

The two settle into comfortable, familiar conversation while interacting with the tots. They discuss work, their concerns for their citizens, and for the future. They discuss a little about their individual history, but nothing too serious. But then:

"Are you seeing anyone, Gaara?" Kakashi asks. The question surprises Gaara.

"No…though, my Council wishes that was a different story. They want me to settle down and get married. They want me to extend the Kazekage bloodline."

Kakashi's eyebrows raise. "And?" he asks.

"And what?"

"Will you? Extend the bloodline."

"....No. I don't think so."

"I see," Kakashi says simply. He lets the matter go, watching as Boruto rubs his sleepy eyes with his chubby fists.

"I've thought about…children, though."

"Adoption?"

"Mhm," Gaara says, watching Shikadai in his lap begin to fuss.

"They're getting tired," Kakashi says. "Let's get them to bed."

"Are you…seeing anyone?" Gaara dares to ask. He knows if he doesn't ask now he never will.

He rises and brings Shikadai with him, wrapping him in his arms.

"I'm not," Kakashi says, and leaves it at that.

Meanwhile, as the two Kage tend to their charges to prepare them for sleep, Temari and Shikamaru are sitting beside Kankuro, Naruto, and Hinata in Icharaku's new establishment.

"Don't you think that what we did…was maybe a little mean?" Hinata asks uncertainly. It's clear to see she's feeling quite guilty.

Temari leans back in her seat and folds her arms, smirking. "No, well, perhaps. But I think we've done what's best for them."

"You think so?"

"Hinata, I feel just as crummy about it as you do," Shikamaru sighs.

"Are you kidding me?" Kankuro butts in. "Our brother has been so excited to see Kakashi lately at the summits. It's more than just a crush, and I don't know if he even realizes it. Poor kid, he's really just a little emotionally stunted when it comes to this stuff, and we're just giving them a little nudge."

"Nudge? You're pulling the strings!" Shikamaru argues. "Gaara's never been alone with a baby. Are we sure we're not going to go home to the greatest disaster we've ever seen?"

"Shikamaru! Don't underestimate him! Besides, he'll be with the Hokage, after all." Temari winks at Hinata. "They'll be fine."

Naruto watches the exchange as he stuffs his mouth with noodles. He shares Hinata's sentiment, and gives her knee a gentle squeeze. "Well, I'm certain Boruto will be fine. Kakashi's watched him before."

"Oh, okay. If you all say so…"

Hours later…

"We're home," Temari says quietly, opening the door to their apartment as silently as possible.

Shikamaru steps in after her. Naruto and Hinata have decided to follow as well, and take Boruto home with them, saving Kakashi the trip.

"Huh? Where are they?" Naruto asks.

Hinata activates her Byakugan and motions with her hand, pointing to the sofa that is turned away from them.

"Babies are sleeping," she whispers.

"Hmph. Which ones?" Temari asks with a grin.

Temari steps in front of the sofa to discover her brother fast asleep, head resting against Kakashi's chest. Kakashi is slumped on the couch, with an arm draped over Gaara's shoulders.

Sand slithers from Gaara's gourd to greet Temari, brushing against her cheek.

"Oh, hun," Temari whispers, beckoning Shikamaru with her hand.

"What?" he asks, head in the nursery. Shikadai is sound asleep on his back in a sleep sack.

Hinata picks up Boruto from the pack and play and holds him to her chest as he whines, upset to be woken. She and Naruto turn to look at Temari.

"How sweet," Hinata says brightly. "It seems the babies tired them out."

"I think even the most capable Kage is quite challenged by a baby, especially yours," Shikamaru says.

Kakashi's eyes open first. "Hey. You guys are back."

"You're both more than welcome to stay," Temari says to him.

"Hmm? Thank you Temari, but I do have somewhere I need to be."

Kakashi gently nudges Gaara, who groans and shifts to bury his face against him.

"Parents are home," he says quietly, into Gaara's messy red hair.

Gaara blinks, realizes where he is, then shoots upright. "I'm sorry," he says, quite mortified.

Kakashi chuckles. "It's fine. I didn't need a blanket with you on me," he teases.

Gaara says nothing but his face is rosy.

"It's time for me to go," Kakashi says, slowly rising to his feet while yawning and stretching. "Well, that was fun. Boruto made a mess of Gaara, but otherwise he took his bottle just fine," Kakashi says, turning his attention to Naruto and Hinata. "He didn't put up much of a fight at bed time."

Temari sits next to Gaara on the couch. "I'm surprised you fell asleep," she says, patting him on the knee affectionately.

"Yes, me too."

"How was Shikadai?"

Gaara smiles brightly, the fog of sleep falling away. "He was wonderful. I'd love to watch him again."

Temari holds back her surprise as best she can. "You…you had that much fun?"

He nods. "He's so sweet."

"I just figured it was a bit of trouble, considering your other duties and travel for work…"

"It's no trouble, Temari."

Temari smiles warmly. Then she leans in and whispers, "How was snuggling with Lord Hokage?"

"Temari!" he exclaims, then gets up.

"I'll see you out," Gaara says to Kakashi as he helps load baby Boruto and his things out of the Nara's apartment.

Kakashi hangs back after Naruto and Hinata say their goodbyes and leave. Temari and Shikamaru retreat to their bedroom for the evening. Temari's made it clear that she and Shikamaru want Gaara to stay for the evening, and he agrees. It beats staying in the hotel.

When it's time to say goodbye, Gaara isn't sure what to say. He looks down at the ground for a moment, gathering his thoughts. Talking with Kakashi came so naturally while they were working together, or busy with the children, but now? He has no idea what to say.

"Gaara…?" Kakashi asks, stirring him from his thoughts.

Gaara gazes up at his sleepy, heavy eyelids.

"This was fun. It's good to see you outside of your comfort zone," Kakashi says, hand clamping on Gaara's shoulder.

"It was fun," Gaara agrees, side-eyeing Kakashi's warm hand. "You are very good with babies," he adds with a smile.

"You are too. You would make a wonderful father someday."

"...Thank you."

"You're welcome. And I mean it."

Kakashi pats his shoulder then removes his hand. "Good night," he says, turning to leave with hands in his pockets.

"Kakashi, wait," Gaara says, stepping after him.

"Hmm?" Kakashi asks, turning his head.

"You don't fit into any calculations," Gaara says quietly. "You asked me last time how you fit into my plans? You don't. Or at least, I haven't figured out how you do."

"That's interesting…" Kakashi muses, gripping his masked chin.

"How so?"

"I haven't quite figured out where you fit either… Good night!" he says with a wave of his hand.

Gaara watches him go, somehow disappointed even after one of the best evenings he's ever had.

Chapter Text

The sun is sweltering hot in Suna as it normally is this time of year. Gaara, despite preferring heat to cold, finds himself rather uncomfortable at an opening ceremony for a self-sustaining and self-watering greenhouse in the desert.

It took a lot of research, but once he was able to get the right contractor involved, the rest of the work seemed to go smoothly.

He wishes Kakashi were here, even if he did say this particular project wasn't in his strengths.

Gaara wipes sweat from his brow as he stands with the project team for pictures. Then after saying a few choice words for the Sunans in attendance, the doors are opened to the public.

Gaara walks inside with them, though he keeps his distance, admiring his people from afar as they interact with the tropical climate plants that have never graced the desert before.

"Excuse me, you're Lord Gaara, aren't you?"

Gaara blinks then turns to the voice that addresses him. An interesting man with purple face paint and a mole on his chin greets him, with camera in hand.

"Yes, I am him," Gaara replies with a small grin.

"Oh, wonderful. Lord Gaara, would you mind doing an interview with me? I run a small publication and I know my readers would love to hear from you directly."

"Me?" Gaara blinks. "I didn't build the greenhouse, nor was I the project manager. I'm not the one you should be interviewing. They are," Gaara says, gesturing to a couple of men and a woman chatting with other visitors.

"Well, that's not entirely true, is it? I heard that this project was a dream of yours."

"You did? Where did you hear that?"

"Hmm. Don't remember."

Gaara considers this.

"I'm Sukea, by the way. I'll buy you lunch."

"That's not necessary," Gaara says. He feels sweat drip from his forehead. The greenhouse is hot and very humid, more than he's used to.

"Are you alright?" Sukea asks.

"I'm fine," Gaara replies. "I'll do the interview."

"That's wonderful, thank you! Do you mind if I get a few pictures too?"

Gaara's heart flutters suddenly and he reaches for his chest. "..."

"Lord Gaara? Are you okay?"

Gaara's vision starts to fade and a ringing sound drowns out the concerned cries near him. The last thing he sees is a familiar face, one he can't quite place, concerned and heavy eyelids worrying over him.

When Gaara wakes he realizes he's in the hospital. And he isn't alone.

Gaara groans and shifts in the hospital bed. There's something cold on his forehead. His jacket and belt and gourd have been carefully removed and folded on a nearby chair. And in another chair, is Sukea.

"You're awake," the stranger says.

Gaara turns to face his way. "What happened? Why are you still here?"

"I'm here to help, I promise!" Sukea says in the most placating voice he can muster. "The nurses think you suffered from heat exhaustion. Perhaps from a little too much excitement and the heat of the day and the greenhouse. They were worried about you because they couldn't get any fluids in you because of your sand. I told them I'd stay."

"...I'm sorry."

"Sorry? For what?"

"I didn't mean to snap at you."

"It's alright. You must not feel well."

"...No."

"You're dehydrated. I'll call for the nurse. Your brother is also on the way here."

Gaara nods in understanding and reaches for his head and removes a cold compress. He shivers.

He watches as Sukea leaves the room. There's something strangely familiar about him, but Gaara can't place it. He's non-threatening, so he supposes he'll permit him to stay until Kankuro arrives.

Moments later he arrives with a hurried nurse. "Good, you're awake," she says, and asks Gaara a series of questions. She jots some notes down on a notepad then hands him a solution in a paper cup.

"Drink this," she says. "Slowly. It doesn't taste good, but unless you think I can get an IV in you, this is as good as it gets."

"It's fine, thank you," Gaara says, taking the cup gratefully and sipping. He's so thirsty.

"Ah, ah!" the nurse says. "Slowly."

Gaara slows his pace.

"You can have another in a few minutes." She hands another cup to Sukea. "Don't let him drink too much too quickly."

Sukea nods. "We'll be alright."

The nurse looks between the two. "You're in charge," she says to Sukea, then leaves in a hurry.

"You don't have to be here," Gaara says. "I'll be fine. If my brother is on his way, you have nothing to worry about. You've done more than enough."

"Maybe, but I'm not ready to leave yet."

Right. The interview.

"What did you want to know?" Gaara asks, taking another sip of solution.

"Why a greenhouse? In the desert?"

"There's many reasons why. There's the ability to provide freshly grown crops in the desert for one, to increase our food security."

"Let me ask the question differently. Is there a personal reason why you chose to pursue this project? Kage duties aside?"

Gaara's brow bones furrow at the question.

"My readers are very curious about the Kazekage," Sukea adds with a toothy smile.

"I see…I guess…to prove to myself it can be done. That even in the most harsh environments on earth, even the most temperamental plants can still flourish, with a little assistance."

"Interesting answer," Sukea says.

"Aren't you going to write that down?" Gaara asks.

"No need. My mind is a steel trap," he says, tapping his temple while his smile meets his eyes.

"Do I know you?" Gaara asks, narrowing his eyes suspiciously.

"I don't believe so? I certainly haven't met you before, Lord Kazekage."

Gaara continues to harbor suspicions about the other man but he keeps them to himself.

"Tell me about yourself. Do you have any other projects planned for peace time?"

Gaara shakes his head. "None that I can share publicly."

"That's okay. Any aspirations for yourself?"

Gaara takes a deep breath, then a sip of his drink, before thinking about it some more.

"I'm really just content to be serving my people," Gaara says, meeting Sukea's gray eyes.

There's something strange, something about the way the man's skin creases on his left eye.

"Is that so? No master plans for romance? Or legacy?"

"On the record? No."

Sukea leans in a little closer from his seat. He lowers his voice. "Is that so? And off the record?"

"I cannot say. I have enemies that would love to smear my name in the tabloids."

"Okay, then. Are you feeling any better?"

Gaara blinks at the sudden change of direction. "I'll be fine. I'm light-headed, and I feel sick, but I'm sure I will be fine in a day or two. I'm sorry you didn't get the picture you were after."

"That's alright. Sometimes the camera obscures the truth, anyway."

"What…do you mean?"

"I mean, I spend time and energy getting the right lighting, composition, and angle, but still not capture the true essence of the subject. For instance, what do you think people see when they see a picture of you?"

"Their Kazekage. A leader."

Sukea nods. "Yes, but what is it that you want them to see? There's much more to you than just that, isn't there?"

Gaara nods hesitantly.

"And I've seen it for myself, with you, first hand. The camera can't help me capture that, not fully. It's only two dimensional."

"I think I understand."

"Well, perhaps there's someone else in your life that wants you to realize this about them, too. That there's more than meets the eye, especially as far as appearances are concerned."

Gaara thinks perhaps he doesn't understand, and that Sukea only gives him more questions than answers. It's then that Kankuro busts through the hospital door.

"Gaara! Are you alright?!"

He rushes to Gaara's side, frowning at the sight of his little brother in a hospital bed.

"I'm fine, Kankuro. A little bit of heat exhaustion won't kill me."

Kankuro looks exasperated. He turns to Sukea. "Do I know you?" he asks.

"Me? Oh no, we've never met. I'm Sukea, a reporter."

"Got it. Well, thanks for looking after him. I've got it from here."

"That's just as well, as I have somewhere I need to be," Sukea replies. "Lord Gaara, it was a pleasure meeting you. Hopefully our paths cross again someday soon. Please get some rest before diving headfirst into work."

The man dips his head respectfully and leaves.

"Huh, he seemed…weird," Kankuro says for lack of a better term.

Kankuro goes to sit down in the chair Sukea was in but he stops suddenly. "Shit, the guy forgot his camera!"

Before Gaara has a chance to say anything Kankuro is trying to chase the man down, camera in hand. Ten minutes later Kankuro returns, out of breath and still holding the camera.

"You didn't find him?" Gaara asks.

"No, it's weird, he left without a trace. I almost wonder if he wanted this to be left behind."

"Hmm. What's on it?"

Kankuro turns the camera on. "I'm not sure that I should be looking."

Gaara doesn't disagree, but he doesn't stop him, either.

"Huh."

"What is it?"

"It's…kind of creepy if you ask me."

"It is?"

"See for yourself."

Kankuro hands the camera over to Gaara. There are a few pictures of the greenhouse opening, and only one of Gaara. Gaara is asleep in the hospital bed, but his head is turned away from the camera. The only real discernible features of himself are his messy red hair and the outline of a black eyelid.

"He said something about trying to capture my essence," Gaara says, handing the camera back to Kankuro. "And I agree, it seems like he might have wanted me to have this, afterall."

"He…didn't remind you of someone, did he?" Kankuro asks.

"Yes, he did."

Chapter Text

Several days after his embarrassing bout of heat sickness, Gaara is at his desk when a bird he has only seen once before circles outside his window. His heart leaps at the sight.

He opens the window and reaches his arm out for the falcon, coating his forearm in a protective sand barrier.

The bird swoops in and dives, landing on him. Gaara doesn't flinch, and instead retrieves the small scroll tied to the bird's leg.

"You're very sweet, aren't you?" Gaara asks, scratching the bird's head affectionately. It closes its large golden eyes as he pets it.

Gaara strokes his head in a long, fluid movement before lifting his arm and sending the bird back home. After watching it disappear from sight, he returns to his desk and takes a seat.

He unrolls the scroll. It reads:

Gaara,

Congratulations. I heard the news about your greenhouse. You must be very proud. I am.

-Kakashi

Gaara reads the message once, twice, six times. His stomach twists. Proud? Kakashi is proud of him?

He reads it once more to be certain. That's what he takes away from the message, more so than how quickly the news, fairly obscure and irrelevant to neighboring countries, had already made its way to Konoha about his successful pet project.

He smiles. He feels warm, pleasantly so.

Very few have told him outright how proud they are of him. He knows he should be for how far he's come, of the man he has chosen to be, rather than follow the trajectory he was on years ago.

Yashamaru of course had spoken those words before Gaara's darkest days. Baki had said it, once or twice. Temari and Kankuro, sure. And his father, in death…had he said it? Gaara cannot remember.

But to hear it from Kakashi…

To read it again and again…to know he wasn't mistaken.

His heart swells in his chest. He feels impossibly happy.

Gaara carefully rolls the scroll up and places it in its carrier. He sets it on the edge of his desk where it is in sight, a most prized item.

As he works, he spends the next few hours also thinking how he might reply to Kakashi, but he falls short of a realistic message that seems appropriate.

He instead goes about the rest of his day, upbeat and feeling unstoppable.

Until that evening…

Gaara sleeps. Well, in fact. A ceiling fan whirs in his room, keeping him reasonably cool, while he is tucked comfortably beneath a plush, satin comforter.

He twitches in his sleep.

"Rin! RINNNNN!!!"

There's a scream, and Gaara wakes suddenly, covered in sweat, to realize he's the one screaming.

Kakashi's arm was through his chest. The high-pitched sound of chidori, just like Sasuke's chidori that was the first to ever strike him, was deafening as the bright blue light encompassed everything, burning all away except for Kakashi…

Kakashi's anguished eyes.

The tears on his face.

The pain…

…Kakashi…

Gaara sobs, the nightmare still so close, so fresh and real in his mind.

The hurt look in Kakashi's eyes, normally such kind eyes, leaves Gaara painfully raw, even if it was just a dream.

Was it a dream?

Gaara's heart is still racing from the sheer terror of the nightmare. Strangely, the terror doesn't seem like his own, but that fact brings little comfort.

Rin? Who was Rin?

Was it only a dream?

Gaara sits up in bed and looks down at his chest and feels it. He can't get the image of his fractured rib cage out of his mind, the blood spatter on Kakashi's mask. He shudders. He knows he won't sleep anymore tonight. So he gets up and pads to the small desk in his bedroom.

He unrolls a blank scroll. He writes:

Dear Kakashi,

Thank you for your letter. It made my day to know you were following the project's success. I am proud of what we accomplished.

There's something else I must ask you about. Forgive me if it is too personal.

I woke from the strangest nightmare, but I fear it wasn't only that.

To spare you all of the details, I was a young girl named Rin. You were screaming her name.

Who was she to you? I hope it is not rude of me to ask.

Yours truly,
愛

It's a week later when Gaara sees the Hokage's falcon return. He stops what he's doing to retrieve the scroll from the bird's leg.

He's eager to read it. He worries he might have pressed too far about matters that were not his business. Fortunately, he has been free of nightmares, but the name Rin still haunts him in waking hours.

He also has not slept very often since, and perhaps his exhausted sleep leaves no room for dreams.

He unrolls it:

Gaara,

How strange it is for you to mention Rin, now of all times.

That's because I was just telling her about you several days ago.

She, like you, was forced to be a Jinchuriki, to Isobu. She was cursed to release Isobu upon Konoha, years and years ago.

Instead of allowing harm to come to innocents, she stood in the way of one of my attacks against our enemies.

She died.

I visit her and Obito at the memorial everyday. I presume you remember Obito. I like to honor their memories in my actions as a shinobi and Hokage.

I told Rin that I think she'd really like you. You possess her spirit, in many ways.

Whether or not ghosts are real, I'm not sure. You dreaming about her though sure seems like one unbelievable coincidence.

I know you would have gotten along well with her. She had the biggest heart. Don't be afraid if she visits your dreams again.

Until next time,

Kakashi

That night, Gaara dreams of Rin again. He is her once again, sitting in a field of tall reeds of grass flowing in the gentle breeze.

She lays in a field, he lays in a field, with a young Kakashi beside her.

He's sitting, cheek resting on his fist as he flips a page in a book. It's not a novel, by the looks of it.

"Why don't you put that down?" Rin asks. Gaara feels himself smile as she gazes upon him.

Kakashi meets her gaze. "Hm?"

"You can study later! How often do we have a moment like this to ourselves? Look at the sky! What do you see in the clouds?"

Gaara rests one hand behind his head and points at the sky with his her other hand.

"See that one? What does that look like to you?"

Kakashi sighs and closes his book. He lies down beside Rin, hands clasped together on his chest as he stares upwards at the late afternoon sky.

"I'm not sure. I've never played this game before."

Rin giggles. "It's not really a game. It's using your imagination!"

Kakashi looks at the cloud Gaara is pointing to and thinks for a moment.

"A giraffe."

Rin laughs. "Exactly! That's what I thought too." She points at another. "What about that one?"

Her voice lowers. "They look like lovers."

Gaara sees it now. Two heads joined together at the lips.

Kakashi's head turns to study Rin. Gaara's heart leaps into his throat.

The way he looks at him now…

His dark gray eyes, heavy-lidded and intense…

Gaara wants him, more than he recalls ever wanting anything.

Then she kisses him. She he reaches for his face in his her hands, holding his face steady to press her lips to his mask, separated by a thin layer of material that Gaara doesn't even notice. He's never kissed anyone before, so the mask feels as natural as air.

Kakashi sighs and pulls her towards him, encircling him in his arms.

They kiss until the moon rises in the sky, illuminating them with magic.

Of course, Gaara realizes.

Rin. She loved him.

Why is she showing him this?

Does he…does he love Kakashi?

With Kakashi's fingers intertwined in his hair, kissing him breathless in the crisp air of night, he knows the answer is a resounding yes.

Why has it taken him so long to realize?

Rin slows her pace, and it's Kakashi that continues, kissing her along her lips, to her chin, and to her forehead.

Rin and Gaara close their eyes.

"How long?" Kakashi asks, breath warm along the bridge of their nose. "...How long have you felt this way, Gaara?"

Gaara wakes just then with a start. His hand reaches for the place on his nose where Kakashi's masked lips had just been moments prior.

"....How…long?"

He falls back asleep shortly afterwards, not returning to the same dream with Rin, but the memory of their kiss still echoes in the dreams that follow.

Chapter Text

Gaara remembers the dream he shared with Rin's ghost so vividly he can almost feel Kakashi's warm breath gently tickling his face.

But he doesn't need to remember. Not when they're this close, jammed together in a closet.

This wasn't what he had in mind when Kakashi invited him back to the office after the other Kage and supporting nin left for the evening. Nevermind that he had been looking forward to this day for an excruciatingly long time.

He's not sure he minds. His heart races and the chakra pooling in his belly feels warm.

"Why are we in here…?" Gaara asks, voice a whisper.

"Shhh," Kakashi hushes him, pressing his finger to Gaara's lips as Kakashi peeks out the small crack of light.

Gaara blinks wide at the sudden invasion and Kakashi doesn't quite remove his finger, only shifts it a little to the side. Gaara tries to see out the thin line of the closet door but cannot make out anything.

Then he hears a familiar voice.

"Ehhhhh, Kakashi?!!"

Kakashi's hand creeps and clamps down over Gaara's mouth. Gaara makes a startled sound.

"I know you're in here! You owe me, buddy! Big time!"

There are so many questions running through Gaara's mind, but he stays quiet, his breathing in heavy bursts against the older man's palm. He wills his sand to remain still in his gourd.

Kakashi's chest rises and falls, pressed against his own.

He smells nice, too.

"You lost! You know the rules! It's time to pay up!"

There's another voice that calls from behind the first. "I don't think he's here…"

Then an oink.

"Damn it, Shizune, I know he's here! Too afraid to own up to your loss? Come out!"

Kakashi actually looks surprised, and Gaara watches his eyes in the dim light. Kakashi looks down at him and lets go of his mouth, though Gaara craves the contact once it's gone.

"Come on, let's check somewhere else. I saw Shikamaru down the hall, maybe he knows where Lord Sixth has gone."

Tsunade hmphs confidently and sweeps her hair over her shoulder before following Shizune out of the Hokage's office.

Kakashi's body goes slack against Gaara.

"Oh, thank goodness. They're gone," Kakashi sighs with relief.

He opens the closet door and peeks outside. The sight is almost comical, but Gaara dares not laugh until he better understands the situation. Kakashi slowly exits and Gaara follows, folding his arms.

He's annoyed. Nevermind he's feeling flustered in a way he cannot remember ever being before.

"What was that about?" Gaara asks, sharper than intended.

Footsteps can be heard down the hall. Kakashi reaches for Gaara's jacket collar and pulls him behind his desk. "Get down!"

Gaara shoots him a reproachful look as he's crouched behind the Hokage's desk, beside said Hokage, in the most undignified manner.

"Huh, well, he was here," Shikamaru says from the office doorway. "Maybe he went home for the evening, he's had a busy day, afterall."

"It's okay, Lady Tsunade. Let's come back tomorrow in the daytime," Shizune urges.

"Wait…waitaminute…what's that?!" Tsunade starts, pointing to something sticking outside the clean lines of the desk.

Gaara blanches. He realizes his gourd is sticking off his hip, not behind the desk.

"Is that…?" Tsunade pauses.

Gaara meets Kakashi's eyes. Kakashi reluctantly nods. They both slowly climb to their feet.

"Ah, Lord Fifth, so good to see you," Kakashi says to her with a smile.

Gaara dips his head in polite greeting.

"Gaara?! What are you doing here?" Tsunade asks.

"I could ask the same thing," Shikamaru says with a smirk.

"I was visiting," Gaara explains calmly.

"It's great to see you, but right now I've got business with you, Kakashi," Tsunade says, walking towards Kakashi with her hands on her hips. "I won fair and square. Hand it over."

"Maa… Fine," Kakashi groans, rubbing the back of his neck. "There's something I need to do with it, first."

Gaara tilts his head curiously at Kakashi. What on earth are they talking about?

"Gaara, I need to reach into that drawer you're in front of," Kakashi says. Gaara side steps out of the way.

Kakashi pulls his desk drawer open to retrieve…a hand mirror. It's quite ordinary.

"Is that it?" Tsunade asks. She holds out her hand.

"Hmhmm," Kakashi says. "But first…"

Kakashi hands the mirror to Gaara. "Take it," he says.

Gaara's brow bones furrow. He's baffled. He takes the mirror into his hands and looks into it. He sees only himself.

He glances at Kakashi, whom is watching him with a warm smile.

"Thank you, Gaara," Kakashi says, hand open in askance. Gaara places the mirror back in his hand, and Kakashi's fingers brush over Gaara's when he closes his fingers over the item.

"You can have it," Kakashi says brightly. "All yours."

Tsunade takes the mirror and gazes into it.

Then she throws it onto the ground with her disproportionate strength and sends it into splinters of glass and slivers of wood.

"Um…you're going to clean that up, right?" Kakashi asks, annoyed.

Shizune is already on the ground, trying to clean the mess.

Gaara says nothing, but sweeps his sand over the floor with a wave of his hand. The floor is spotless.

"I'd love to stay and chat shop, but being retired and all, I've got places to be. Next time be careful who you bet against!" Tsunade turns and waves, and Shizune and Tonton follow.

"Some things literally never change," Kakashi sighs. "I've got it from here, Shikamaru. Good night."

"Good night, Kakashi. You too, Gaara."

"Good night," Gaara says. There's a light feeling in his chest. He realizes it's excitement—he's about to be alone with Kakashi and he hasn't been dismissed.

Once it's just them, Kakashi's shoulders slump and he leans against his desk, observing the Kazekage with tired eyes.

"You're probably wondering what that was all about."

"I am."

"That mirror was…well, I obtained it a long time ago. I discovered that it reveals who a person is, in their most true form. Whenever I looked into it…with my mask, it would show who I am underneath."

"It captured the viewer's essence. Is that it?"

Kakashi holds Gaara's curious and eager gaze for a moment too long.

"Yes…that's it."

"Is that why Tsunade wanted it? Because it shows how old she really is?"

"The last time we visited we drank a little too much and it came up in conversation, though I can't quite recall how. Needless to say, I placed a bet…knowing her track record for her unlucky gambling streak. It seems I broke her bad luck spell. Would you believe it?"

"I believe you might have wanted her to have it," Gaara says, calmly regarding Kakashi. "And you lost on purpose, though I'm still not sure why we were hiding from her."

"Me?" Kakashi asks. "And why would I choose to lose?"

"It was a calculated move. I admire that about you."

Gaara watches the outline of Kakashi's lips beneath his mask widen into a smile.

"I didn't see anything different in the mirror…" Gaara continues. "Only myself."

Kakashi grips his grin thoughtfully. "I thought that might be the case, but I wanted to know for sure."

"...Why?" Gaara's on edge for the answer.

Kakashi's eyes crinkle into a squint as he smiles. He reaches out to ruffle Gaara's soft hair, and his touch lingers for a moment more, finger tips massaging his scalp affectionately.

"I was curious to see what a person who was true to themselves might appear like in the mirror. It seems you aren't hiding anything."

Gaara's lips part as he considers his next words. "That's not…entirely true."

Then he closes his eyes and sighs. "That feels really nice." His head drops, allowing for more access.

"Is that so?" Kakashi asks, giving a few more rubs before his arms retreat to his sides, bracing the desk. "What are you hiding?"

"I really like you," Gaara hears himself say.

Kakashi laughs warmly. "You've never hid how you feel about me…and I really like you too."

They stand together in silence. The wind outside the office window is blustery, swaying the trees and rustling them in the dark night.

"Will you…tell me about Rin?" Gaara asks, uncertain how to approach the strange tension he feels shift between them.

Something in Kakashi's eyes change. The lightness that was in them moment's before fades.

"I'll show you," he says. "Come with me."

Chapter Text

Gaara puts on his overcoat and follows Kakashi out into the rain. The wind bites at his cheeks, nose, and face and the rain water stings his eyes and plasters his hair to his forehead, but Gaara does not complain.

He walks alongside Kakashi, whom is buried deep in his thoughts.

They walk along the lit sidewalks to the memorial site in companionable silence.

Until…

"Gaara, can I ask you a question?" Kakashi asks.

"Anything."

"You…you were dead once, is that right?"

Gaara nods his head. "I didn't know that you heard about that."

"I think everyone heard. Not just anyone dies and returns to the land of the living, especially in the manner you did."

Gaara turns to face him, uncertain where this conversation is leading.

"I'm here now."

"Yes, yes you are."

Kakashi continues to lead them, in no rush. "We were overdue for this rain," he explains to Gaara though he did not ask.

Then…

"Are you sure about this? I wonder…" Kakashi doesn't finish his thought.

Gaara reaches for Kakashi's shoulder, hoping that he comes across as reassuring. "I'm sure. This is part of who you are. I wish to understand."

Kakashi stops walking and meets Gaara's earnest gaze. He clasps his wet hand over Gaara's own, giving what little warmth he can offer.

They stare at eachother like that for a moment. Several. Then Kakashi keeps on, and Gaara follows at his side.

"Here it is," Kakashi says once the angular monument is in sight. "This is more of a memoriam for many fallen shinobi. Obito was named dead here, before we knew the truth. Rin…her body was not recovered, but this is where I pay my respects."

"Everyday?"

"Mhm."

Gaara watches as Kakashi crouches before the memorial. He realizes this is very private for Kakashi. He's allowed Gaara to see a part of him that not anyone else bears witness.

He steps beside Kakashi, lowering his fingers to his shoulder, choosing to remain silent as Kakashi grieves.

Just then, something catches Gaara's attention from the corner of his eye. His sand rustles on his hip but does not respond to a threat.

He lets go of Kakashi and turns from the monument, scanning the dark surrounding woods for any sign of movement.

"We're alone," Kakashi says, sensing his alarm.

It's not that Gaara doesn't believe him. He has to see for himself.

He sees something again, this time from the other side. A flash of light. Bright. Pink, maybe purple.

He turns his head and walks in that direction, sandals splashing in puddles from the downpour.

He swears he hears a laugh just then, and shivers creep along his spine. Goosebumps prick along his cold skin.

Hurry up! You'll be late!

Gaara stops dead in his tracks. He feels his heart thunder in his chest.

A girl, possibly no older than fifteen, crosses his path. She stops, turning to look at him.

You're here! Can you see me?

Gaara's eyes are wide with disbelief. A boy with orange and blue runs behind her, out of breath. He recognizes him, and his heart hurts at the sight of his innocence. Both of theirs.

"You should have never had to die…" Gaara says, voice raw with emotion.

Rin's ghost smiles, stepping towards him with a bright smile.

I know you. You've been keeping him safe, she says, gesturing to Kakashi.

Kakashi's eyes are on Gaara now.

"Yes," Gaara replies, smiling sadly. "You would be so proud of him; he watches over everyone in the village. And though I cannot be here as often as I would like, I watch over him."

How lucky he is, to have someone like you to love him, she says. He's told us all about you.

"He has?"

Rin giggles.

Rin! Come on, let's go! We'll be late!

"Don't go…" Gaara whispers.

Kakashi steps in front of Gaara, hands in his pockets, assessing the Kazekage with dark eyes.

It's you that should go! You both have so much left to live for!

Then Rin looks down at her feet.

She is still a child, afterall, Gaara realizes. He remembers being that age, and so burdened by Shukaku. What she must have endured.

Will you tell him? How much we love him? How much I do? I don't want him to cry over us anymore. I want him to live. I never meant for him to be so sad…

"Of course I will."

She then reaches for Kakashi's arm. Gaara watches, but Kakashi does not react to the touch. She floats up to his cheek and leans in to whisper something, and Kakashi shivers.

She gives Gaara one final glance. Goodbye!

Then they're alone.

Gaara's heart feels like it might shatter at any moment. He turns to Kakashi, who eyes him with concern.

"She loved you," Gaara says, voice breaking with a sob. "Rin and Obito love you so much."

Kakashi's eyes go soft. He's never seen Gaara come apart like this. He holds his arms open, and Gaara walks into his embrace.

"I know," Kakashi says softly, wrapping his arms around Gaara's back.

"She doesn't want you to hurt anymore," Gaara adds, burying his face against Kakashi's cowl.

"I know," Kakashi hums.

Gaara pulls back from Kakashi, just enough to get a good look at him.

"You met her, I take it?" Kakashi asks.

"Yes."

"How was she?"

"She didn't seem to be suffering anymore. Her or Obito. They want you to be free of this burden." Gaara reaches for Kakashi's face. "...So do I."

"...Easier said than done, but I will…try to lighten the load, I suppose," Kakashi says, leaning into the warmth of Gaara's palm.

"If you think I can, I want to help."

Kakashi grabs Gaara's hand, and presses his own hand over his, holding it against his cheek. "You already have."

They remain like that for some time, Gaara too afraid to break the spell of the moment. He is lost for words, but he only wants to stay this way as long as he can, this close to Lord Sixth.

"Come on, Gaara," Kakashi says brightly, releasing his hand suddenly. "It's wet and freezing and I can't have the Kazekage getting sick on his trip to Konoha. My place is always open to you, if you wish to stay tonight."

Gaara nods. "Yes, I would love that."

Kakashi leads him back to an apartment. It's sparse, but spacious.

"You don't live at the Hokage mansion?" Gaara asks, removing his wet coat.

"No, it isn't for me. I don't like to think about the others that lived there before me." He offers to take Gaara's coat and hangs it on a rack beside the door. "Let me get you a towel. I've got dry clothes too."

"I hate to burden you," Gaara says, embarrassed at the prospect of wearing the Hokage's clothing.

"You're no burden," Kakashi says seriously, before disappearing into another room.

When he returns he tosses a pair of sleep pants and a long sleeved shirt to Gaara, as well as a fluffy towel.

"Get dressed. I'll put a pot of tea on. Are you hungry?"

"I am, but I can help."

"Ah ah, no helping. You're my guest after all."

Gaara opens his mouth to protest.

"I insist."

Gaara's mouth snaps closed but he smiles.

"Guest room is right there," he says, tapping on a door frame as he disappears again. "Make yourself at home."

Once dry and dressed Gaara glances at a reflection of himself in a mirror. Kakashi's clothes are a bit baggy, but they work in a pinch. He attempts to comb his hair with his fingers before stepping out of his room to find Kakashi with a book in his hand, standing beside the stove with a tea kettle.

"There you are. It's not much, but I've got instant ramen or instant oatmeal. Or if you're really hungry I could figure out something with…hmm…"

"Oatmeal is fine, Kakashi," Gaara says with a grin. "What are you reading?"

"Oh. This thing? It's a romance novel. It's um, an acquired taste."

"I've read one of them in the series. It was…interesting. I didn't dislike it."

Kakashi hums, acknowledging him. He sets the book down and turns his back to Gaara, taking the almost whistling kettle off the burner and turning it off.

"Green tea or black? Maybe something with fruit?" Kakashi asks, pouring hot water into two cups.

"I'll have whatever you have," Gaara says simply, distracted by a shelf with photos in the small dining nook.

There's a picture with Kakashi and Team 7, back when Naruto and Sasuke and Sakura were much much younger. Him too. He remembers a mission he took with them long ago, and how even then, Kakashi was willing to look past his misdeeds and his attack against Konoha and look towards his future instead.

"You know," Gaara starts, taking a seat at Kakashi's small table for two. "You were always accepting of me. You never questioned me or my status or desire to become a better person. My own sensei had qualms, understandably. But if you did, I never sensed them."

Kakashi sets the cups of hot water down as well as two bowls. He goes to the cupboard and returns with tea bags and instant oatmeal packets and two spoons.

"Is that so?" he asks.

"I am grateful to you for that."

Kakashi's eyes squint and there's color on the rise of his cheekbones.

"You were a child, Gaara. I knew from experience how terrible our circumstances required us to be. You deserved my respect, and belief that you could be trusted after learning from your mistakes. Was I wrong?"

"No. It's just…many could stand to learn from you."

"I could say the same for you. Sorry about the bare pantry, by the way, if I had known you'd actually be coming over—"

"It's perfect," Gaara says, smiling warmly and meeting Kakashi's dark gray eyes. He grabs a tea bag and steeps it, and mixes oatmeal in his bowl.

"There's no place I'd rather be right now," he continues softly, watching his spoon stir the water in the porridge-like mixture.

"That makes two of us," Kakashi says.

"...Are you going to eat?"

Kakashi quietly considers the question, then slowly pushes his cowl up over his lips to sip his tea.

Gaara's heart skips a beat. He can't see his full face but…

Kakashi's chin and lips…

He's handsome.

Not to mention the charismatic mole beside his mouth. Hmm. It seems so familiar. Perhaps from an actor he's seen on television or in advertising.

"Well, don't stare," Kakashi chides gently.

"Sorry."

"It's okay, don't be."

They stay awake into the late hours, chatting casually and enjoying each other's company while the rain outside bounces and pings off of the rooftop with a satisfying plunking noise. It's past midnight when Gaara notices how Kakashi is barely awake.

"Please, don't feel like you must entertain me. Get some rest," Gaara says.

Kakashi yawns and stands to his feet, turning out the lights. "You're leaving for Suna tomorrow?"

"I'm afraid so, but I can stay until noon."

"Breakfast in the morning?"

"Please. I'd like that."

"Me too. Good night, Gaara. Wake me if you need anything."

Kakashi walks past Gaara and ruffles his hair, grinning lazily at him beneath his mask, before retreating to his bedroom.

"Good night," Gaara calls after him.

He sleeps well, wrapped in Kakashi's scent on his clothes and blankets.

The next morning Gaara awakes to the sound of a door shutting. Gaara wakes in alarm, and steps out from the guest room to investigate.

"Sorry!" Kakashi says, "I didn't mean to wake you." His hands are full of grocery bags.

"Can I help?" Gaara asks, quick to take the bags from him.

"You already are," Kakashi says, smirking beneath his mask.

Kakashi sets up shop in his small kitchen and shoos Gaara out, handing him the latest Icha Icha novel. "I've got this," Kakashi says, eyeing Gaara with a look that Gaara doesn't dare to push further.

He settles in a chair with the book instead.

He's not sure how much time has passed when Kakashi calls him back into the kitchen.

"That one is my favorite," Kakashi says, cracking an egg over a perfectly seasoned bowl of rice and setting it down in front of the Kazekage.

"You really didn't have to go through the trouble," Gaara says, accepting the bowl.

"I wasn't going to let you leave without a good meal," Kakashi replies.

Gaara digs into his food. It's delicious, the way the yolk tastes buttery and melts into the fragrant rice. He looks up and smiles at Kakashi, whom has rolled up the bottom of his mask to eat in his presence.

"It's very good. Thank you."

"You're welcome."

"You said this book is your favorite?"

"It is. I like to reread the part where the protagonist's love interest confesses her feelings for him. He'd been so preoccupied with telling himself she couldn't possibly be interested in him, that he missed all the signs."

Gaara's attention turns to the book on the table beside him. His fingers trace down the spine of the book.

"It sounds interesting. I didn't get very far."

"Take it with you," Kakashi says, without skipping a beat.

"Are you sure?"

"I wouldn't offer it if I wasn't. Please, take it with you. You can always bring it back next time you come to Konoha."

Gaara smiles. "Thank you."

Gaara feels a bit blue having to leave already. But with Kakashi's book in the breast pocket of his dried coat the trip home feels less lonely. That, and Kankuro greets him excitedly at the thunder train station.

"You stayed at his home?" Kankuro asks, blinking in shock.

"I did," Gaara says, thinking nothing of it. He waves at Kakashi from the platform, and Kakashi turns and walks away, hands in his pockets, ready to return to work.

"Well…how'd it go?!"

"I had fun," Gaara replies with a sly smile as he steps onto the train, with his older brother prodding for more information he won't give.

Once seated, he pulls out the book and begins to read, losing himself in the story as the world around him blurs past.

Chapter Text

Days go by. They go quickly, with the duty of Hokage occupying Kakashi from dawn until dusk, only for him to eat, sleep, and do it all over again.

He's changing, he realizes. With the changing of the season, of summer to fall, and fall to winter, he notices the changes in himself.

Sure, age is a constant factor. His knees creak when he goes up and down the stairs to his apartment and to his office. He supposes his days trapped at his desk haven't helped much with that. But as he approaches forty, he knows he isn't that old, and the peace that the Five Great Shinobi Nations has likely afforded him and others many more years that they were otherwise unlikely to ever see.

No, there are other changes as well.

For instance, he skipped his visit to the memorial one day.

He completely forgot.

Once he realized he had skipped the trip he had felt remorse, and guilt. But then he remembered Gaara's words. Rin and Obito…they want him to move on. Somewhere deep down he knew that to be true all along, but torturing himself with the pain of their loss was somehow…easier. He never wanted to forget, and still doesn't.

But he knows he can never forget. Certainly not Rin, and the kiss they shared in the grassy field so many years ago. And certainly not Obito, whose actions and in the end, his heart, or what was missing from it, affected them all.

Gaara's unique circumstances having met death were part of the reason he decided to bring him to the memorial with him. He suspected from his previous letter that perhaps Rin's ghost was communicating with him, and now he's sure of it.

Then, after one missed trip, there were several. He would go once a week. Then, once a month.

Other people would leave flowers. The grass was still maintained. Others came to grieve for others that had fallen too.

Life goes on.

It's so short, he realizes.

And Gaara…

Kakashi sighs at his desk as he daydreams, looking out the window at the birds that are so free to do as they like all day. He touches the side of his mask, on his cheek.

He remembers the warmth of his hand. The pleading look in his aquamarine eyes begging him to live and to let go of the past.

Ironic, considering Gaara's own past. But perhaps, it's because of his past that Kakashi decides to listen.

Kakashi may be twelve years Gaara's elder, but the young man knows much about life that Kakashi has to credit him for.

Then on the other hand…Gaara's just as clueless.

Kakashi is unsure if he should continue to wait, and play it safe, or…

The risk is quite high. He must be absolutely sure that any advances on their friendship is welcome.

And Kakashi isn't absolutely sure. It's maddening.

Kakashi sighs again and kicks a foot up on his desk, lacing his fingers behind his head as he takes a moment to rest his eyes. Oh well. It's not like he has time for romance. It's all wishful thinking, anyway. Better to stick to his novels and fantasies, he can't hurt or disappoint anyone that way.

He's aware of how much a broken heart could harm Gaara. The Kazekage may be a force to be reckoned with and his defense is formidable, but only because he's built such a strong foundation to protect his heart of glass.

And Kakashi never wants to be the one to shatter it.

A knock at the window catches his attention.

Kakashi opens an eye and swivels to look. It's…!

Kakashi stands up and opens the latch on the window.

"What are you doing here…?" Kakashi asks, holding his arm out for the Kazekage's hawk to land.

The bird lands on his sleeved arm and Kakashi winces as her talons dig into his skin. He manages to get the small scroll off her leg. It isn't an official scroll used for communication between officials.

Kakashi's heart races. What could Gaara want? Is he in trouble? Is it a message he didn't want intercepted? What does it say?

Kakashi unrolls the scroll and his stomach sinks.

It's addressed to Sukea.

Dear Sukea,

I hope this letter finds you well. I am in need of your services. I hope you will be discreet. I am hoping to raise money to secure funding for another greenhouse.

My brother has advised me that a calendar featuring the plants, as well as the Kazekage, may entice buyers.

I am embarrassed but I am certain you will treat this with the utmost professionalism.

Please let me know if you are up to the task. You will, of course, be compensated fairly.

I also have your camera, but I am sure you have others. It seemed as though you meant to leave it with me, but you are welcome to it.

Regards,
Lord Gaara, Fifth Kazekage of the Sand

Kakashi blinks, rereads the letter, and feels dread creep over him. Sweat gathers on his brow.

Certainly he must say no and politely decline. Besides, he barely has any time to leave Konoha. He returned to a disaster when he returned home from his last trip to Suna.

That and…well. Gaara had seen his face. Some of it, anyway. And to cover Sukea's mole now…that would draw too much attention to it, and Kakashi knows Gaara is no fool.

He already suspects Gaara may be on to him with their earlier discussion about the mirror Tsunade had broken.

No, he absolutely cannot go to Suna as Sukea and take racy photos of the Kazekage. Absolutely not.

So he retrieves a quill while the hawk waits on the ledge outside his window and writes:

Dear Kazekage,

I am flattered you would think of me for such an important task. Rest assured, I will treat this assignment with respect and discretion.

What a great idea. I'm sure many will be clamoring over a chance to purchase a calendar featuring Suna's most eligible bachelor.

Count me in. I will arrive in three days.

Respectfully,
Sukea

Kakashi reads and rereads the letter to be sure there are no obvious tells. He's even written the message with his non-dominant hand so that the handwriting can not be compared reasonably with any scrolls Gaara may already have from him. And the paper is ordinary and simple.

What is he doing?

Kakashi sighs as he secures the message to the hawk and sends her off.

He wishes he was smarter than this.

"What was that about?" Shikamaru asks as he steps into Kakashi's office.

Kakashi sighs again and rubs the back of his neck. "Someone I know needs a favor…do you think you can cover for a few days later this week? I'm sorry to dump this on you so unexpectedly."

"Man, what a drag. It's fine. Where are you headed?"

Kakashi smiles with his eyes. "Oh, just visiting a friend who lives a ways away. I wouldn't go if it wasn't really important."

Shikamaru scrutinizes him with a hand on his hip.

Kakashi is quietly dying inside. Shikamaru is way too smart for a dumb lie like this.

But Shikamaru lets it go. "Okay, man. I'll get everything set, and delegate authorities for your absence. But you owe me. Maybe you can babysit Shikadai some night? Temari and I could definitely use a break."

"Yeah, I can do that," Kakashi says with a nervous smile under his cowl.

Shikamaru turns to leave, but before he's gone, he turns and grasps his goatee, smirking. "This wouldn't happen to be about my brother-in-law, would it?"

Kakashi feels a flush creep over his cheeks and he can only hope the mask covers it efficiently.

"No, not at all. Why would it be?"

"No reason," his assistant replies, smooth as ice, before gliding out of sight with a knowing grin on his face.

"Well, fuck me," Kakashi groans under his breath, turning to his stacks of piled work.

Three days pass, and Sukea arrives as promised to Suna. He's purchased another speedy camera—he should have thought more about leaving his other one behind, but he never expected to be here again.

He heads straight for the Kazekage's mansion, and an assistant greets him warmly.

"Oh, you must be the photographer! Lord Gaara's been expecting you!"

Sukea makes easy small talk in his alternate voice. It makes his voice a bit scratchy and raw but he can handle it.

The assistant knocks on the Kazekage's door frame to get his attention. "Lord Gaara, Sukea is here to see you, sir."

"Wonderful, send him in please."

"Go right ahead," she says, gesturing for him to enter Gaara's office. He does and she vanishes.

"We meet again," Sukea says, affecting a confident but respectful tone. "I'm so glad you thought to use me for my services. How have you been since we last met?"

Gaara rises from his desk and goes to greet him. He reaches for his hand and gives a firm handshake. He lingers a bit longer than Kakashi would normally expect, but he doesn't draw attention to it.

"I am better, thank you for asking. That was quite embarrassing for me. I was grateful to you for taking me to the hospital and staying with me, but I should hope that never happens again. I've made sure to hydrate well today."

"I'm sure you'll be fine. Did you want to do this now, or…?"

"I've cleared my afternoon, if it works for you. Did you travel far?"

Kakashi swallows. "Not too far," he says. "My belongings are already at a hotel, so I am ready to get to work."

Gaara smiles. "That's great, then. I'll get my brother and we can head for the greenhouse."

"Brother?" Sukea blinks.

"Yes, the whole thing was his idea. He said he has suggestions for poses."

Sukea nods. "Oh, I see."

"That will not be an issue, will it?" Gaara asks so earnestly that Kakashi feels terrible for even asking.

"It's completely fine," he assures him.

He's not sure why he thought he'd be alone with Gaara.

Hell, he's still not sure why he's here, basically lying to his very sweet face.

Gaara motions for Sukea to follow, and they retrieve Kankuro from a debrief meeting with Sunan shinobi.

"Oh! I almost forgot," Kankuro says. "Yeah, give me a few minutes, I'll meet you guys there."

Sukea walks alongside the Kazekage in the winter sun. It's still hot compared to Konoha, and he isn't too uncomfortable in his scarf and green coat.

"A second greenhouse, hmm? What will go in the this one?"

"Well, it will hopefully be a project to feed some of the hungry in my village. The first was to show it could be done, but now I'd like to take it in an agricultural direction for food security."

"Do you even need to be selling calendars at all?" Sukea chuckles. "Shouldn't that be your mission statement? Wouldn't that be enough for everyone to support you?"

Gaara frowns. "You would think that, but it isn't so easy. Some of my Council disagrees and says I'm wasting my time and energy and making a fool of myself, growing such plants in the desert."

Sukea is about to say something far more Kakashi than Sukea, but Gaara keeps going before he can.

"They have little to no regard for the generations to come after them and they are so set in their ways. They denounce any thinking that is different from their own. It aggravates me to no end."

Then Gaara sighs. "I'm sorry you had to hear me vent. I've had a difficult few days with them lately."

"Oh?" Sukea asks, as they approach the greenhouse. He opens the door for Gaara. "How so?"

"They want me to settle down and have a family."

Oh.

"That seems like quite an unfair pressure to put on you, considering everything else that weighs on your shoulders."

"I'm sorry, Sukea. I shouldn't have said anything. It isn't for you to worry about."

Kakashi is taken aback. He had no idea Gaara was being subjected to these sorts of societal pressures at home.

Would Gaara…marry, then?

He dismisses the thought quickly from his mind. It makes him angry, and he must keep a level head if he wishes to keep his cover.

They enter the greenhouse, and Gaara goes to check on a control panel and does a quick check of the facility to be certain they are the only ones here.

Gaara pulls a bag off of his back and opens it. "Water?" he asks, offering a bottle to Sukea.

"Yes please."

They both take a break to drink. Then Gaara retrieves a bundle of red cloth.

"Please excuse me. I will get changed."

There's a wooden partition that looks like it might be here just for the photo shoot. The Kazekage stands behind it and Kakashi can hear the rustle of fabric (and sand) as he changes.

When Gaara emerges he's wearing a skin-tight swimsuit that hugs his form, and only reveals his toned arms. The rest of his skin is covered from throat to ankle.

"That's…hmm. That's a bit modest, don't you think?" Sukea asks, certainly with no alternative prerogatives in mind.

"That's what I told him!" comes Kankuro's boisterous voice from behind them. Kankuro claps Sukea on the back.

"Hey, man. Good to see you again. Thanks for keeping an eye on my little brother and doing us a favor."

Kakashi thinks Kankuro might be a little too chummy but he says nothing about it.

Gaara folds his arms and narrows his eyes at Kankuro. "I told you, this is what I feel comfortable in."

"The audience will definitely respond to your comfort," Sukea says, retrieving his camera and setting it up. "If this is what you feel best in, that's where we should start."

"Then he can take it off, right?" Kankuro asks, grinning.

Sukea turns his attention to Gaara's burning green eyes. "Whatever you feel comfortable doing, isn't that right, Lord Gaara?"

Gaara looks to him for guidance and ignores his brother. "Where should I stand? Or should I sit?"

"How about you stand for now. Stand among those plants. There, that's good." Sukea snaps some shots. "Very nice."

Sukea looks at the screen on his camera and then back at his subject, who definitely seems to be on edge.

"Look at me," Sukea says, snapping two more. He looks at the camera and sighs. "You're tense. Is there something we can do to lighten the mood?"

"Yeah, Gaara. Any ideas that could help you 'relax'?" Kankuro teases, and Sukea is aggravated. He's not sure why Kankuro is antagonizing Gaara so much right now but it needs to stop.

"Maybe that Icha Icha novel the Hokage gave you will help take the edge off," Kankuro continues, with a wink.

"Wait…the Hokage did what?" Sukea asks, biting his tongue to chastise Kankuro. This is the perfect opportunity to cast any suspicion off of himself.

"He lent Gaara a romance novel. Isn't that right?"

Gaara nods slowly.

"Oh," Sukea says. "Did you read it?"

"I did. It was good," Gaara replies simply, not offering any further insight.

"I had no idea Lord Hokage, or you for that matter, were interested in such fiction," Sukea says, but smiles. "I think that just goes to show you the depth of your character. You're just always keeping everyone guessing."

"I suppose so," Gaara says with a shy grin.

"There he is!" Sukea says, snapping the camera.

Sukea walks towards Gaara to pull a few fronds of a monstera plant to the front of Gaara's face. "Like that. Good. Smile like you mean it!"

"He should go shirtless though, right?" Kankuro asks, rubbing his chin in thought.

Gaara frowns.

"Hey, I didn't say take it all off! But you're trying to sell these. This will sell, trust me!"

Gaara sighs and shakes his head with an apologetic smile. "Sukea, I trust your judgment. What do you think?"

Sukea feels like this might be a trap. But he answers truthfully. "Going shirtless would definitely yield the results you want. We should try it if you're comfortable with it."

"He's right. Maybe you just wonder…what would Lord Kakashi think if he saw these pictures?" Kankuro prods.

"Stop!" Gaara yells. "Just stop."

"You're making my client upset," Sukea says, rounding on Kankuro.

Kankuro looks between Gaara, who is pointedly avoiding looking at him, and Sukea. "Well, I see I'm not needed. You could have just said you didn't need me here, Gaara."

Kankuro turns to leave. "Good seeing you again, Sukea," he says, dipping his hood in his direction. He leaves.

Gaara seems more visibly relaxed as soon as he's gone, almost instantly.

"Sorry you had to see that," Gaara says, slowly peeling off his swimwear down to his waist, revealing slender but defined muscles on his shoulders, collarbones, chest, and abs.

Kakashi reaches for a sip of water. It feels like nine million degrees in here.

"It's fine. I never had a sibling, but I can imagine. I had friends that were like brothers to me."

"Are you still in touch with them?" Gaara asks.

Sukea snaps a few more photos. "Sit here," he says, gripping Gaara by his shoulder and gently guiding him into position. "Lift your chin. Hmm. Not like that. Like this." He grabs Gaara's chin and tilts his head.

"Perfect." Snap. Snap.

"I lost one. I've got two other friends that are like brothers though; they definitely keep me on my toes."

He thinks about Gai, and Tenzo. Oh, Shikamaru is on that list now. He's not sure he counts Naruto, not yet.

"Maybe three," he amends.

Gaara smiles, and it catches him off guard. His stomach does a somersault. Snap, snap.

"Beautiful," Sukea says. "You're a natural at this."

"Thank you," Gaara says softly. His cheeks are slightly rosy and there's a mischievous look in his eyes Kakashi isn't too keen to read into at the moment, lest he slip up and embarrass himself.

"You read Icha Icha?" Sukea asks conversationally.

Snap, snap.

"I have. I mean, I've read the first, skipped the second, and read the third. I'm not sure that counts."

"It counts." Sukea walks behind his subject and takes a few photos of his toned back, the shadows and scattered light from the sun and plants draping over Gaara quite nicely.

Gaara says nothing, but slowly removes the bottom half of his swim suit.

Kakashi hopes he doesn't look like a spooked deer.

"Um, are you comfortable like that?" Sukea asks, feeling his cheeks burn.

Gaara stands, his back still facing towards the flustered photographer. The swimsuit is held in one hand, covering his front, while his hip is jutted out, accentuating every delectable curve of his spine to his…his…

Kakashi is sweating. He hopes the glue holding his eyelids up doesn't melt in his heat.

Snap, snap.

Kakashi is out of encouraging words to say. It seems he's underestimated how far Gaara would take this.

"I think so. Am I making you uncomfortable?" Gaara asks innocently. Kakashi hasn't noticed how long his eyelashes are until this moment when he blinks demurely.

Sukea pulls at his scarf, letting out the trapped heat. "I'm fine," he replies with a nervous laugh, but he's in a tailspin.

"You must have many other clients that you shoot like this?" Gaara asks, turning his head back to look at him, his dark eyelids showcasing his jeweled eyes and his voice silky and deep and Kakashi realizes he is in a trap.

Before Kakashi can answer, Gaara adds, "I did think it was strange how there were no other photos on the camera you left with me in the hospital."

"I clear my camera in between clients and assignments," Sukea says. "Standard procedure."

"Of course," Gaara purrs.

Damn Kazekage, he knows exactly what he's doing, doesn't he?

Snap, snap. "There, I think that's probably good. Have a look."

Sukea hands the camera to Gaara. Gaara stands beside him, completely naked save for the clothes he holds at his front. "It seems you captured my essence, don't you think?"

Gaara, Kakashi thinks, exasperated.

Kakashi lowers his voice. He's tired of playing and he knows he no longer has the upper hand.

"I've never seen this side of you before," Kakashi says quietly.

Gaara blinks, eyes wide, before he settles on a small grin. "I hoped it was you."

"What gave me away?" Kakashi asks, sighing as he removes his disguise, slowly, piece by piece, while pulling a spare cowl over his head and down over his nose and lips before Gaara can see his full face.

"Many things."

Kakashi blinks. "You're telling me I was that bad? I'll have you know I've perfected this persona over decades, only to have you tear it down in two visits. You're going to have to be more specific than that."

"Not many people are as familiar with me as you are. Even though you tried to maintain a polite and professional distance, I suspected. Also—your mole, your scarred eyelid has a dimple when you smile, and then there's the scent of your hair wash."

Kakashi sighs, defeated. "Maa…what was this about then? You didn't actually need a photographer, did you? Was this all a ruse to visit me? You could just ask to see me, you know. I think you know by now I'd drop just about everything if you needed me."

"It was a legitimate need. I am trying to raise money for a greenhouse. It seemed too easy to be able to call upon Sukea for help."

Gaara steps behind the changing screen and dresses himself.

Kakashi is frowning when Gaara steps back out, dressed in his regular attire.

"This wasn't nice, you know," Kakashi starts.

"Nor was it nice of you to assume I'd fall for your disguise," Gaara retorts quickly. "I was fine about you keeping your face a secret, but sneaking around me and keeping me in the dark is quite hurtful."

Kakashi is struck by Gaara's words. Furthermore, the younger man actually seems upset.

"Why not just visit me and congratulate me on the greenhouse? Why not be honest with me about Sukea?" Gaara asks, head slightly tilted to one side. "What is the need for secrecy? What are you hiding? I don't understand."

"I'm afraid, Gaara," Kakashi says, eyes full of dark storm clouds.

"...Of what?" Gaara takes a step towards him.

"It was easier to interact with you as someone else…because you wouldn't be disappointed with me if I failed you."

Gaara's lips part and his brow bones furrow. "Kakashi…?"

Kakashi looks down at him, feeling heartbroken. "I'm sorry I lied to you. Perhaps I should go." He turns to leave, handing the camera to Gaara as he does.

"Kakashi…you've never once failed me…" Gaara walks after him. "Please, please stay with me. I only wanted to see you."

Kakashi slows and turns to face him. "Gaara…" Kakashi breathes. His head is in a state, but he knows from years of turmoil his mind is not always to be trusted when his demons threaten him with fears and doubts.

"Please, don't come all this way just to leave. You only just got here."

Gaara's face looks so young. Kakashi is aware of the young boy underneath the layers of decorum that needs and craves stability, and closeness.

He can't turn him away. He's not that cruel. Not anymore.

He turns and opens his arms, and within moments Gaara is holding him tightly.

"I won't leave. Not until I have to," Kakashi reassures him, speaking quietly into his hair.

Arms tighten around him, almost too tight, but Kakashi allows it. His hand rests at the nape of the young man's neck, under the layers of hair.

"I'm sorry," Gaara says.

"I'm sorry too." Kakashi presses his lips to Gaara's scar.

Several minutes pass as they remain in the embrace.

"People are going to flip over those pictures," Kakashi says. "You'll have a second greenhouse in no time."

"No one is going to see most of those," Gaara says with a small laugh. Kakashi can sense how relaxed he is now that the storm has passed.

"How come I get to see you like that?" Kakashi asks, pulling back to inspect the Kazekage's face.

"You called me beautiful," Gaara replies, voice breathy.

Kakashi laughs. "I have only called a handful of people beautiful and not one of them got naked for me before. Well, maybe Gai, but that's a whole other story, special circumstances notwithstanding. We were undercover."

Gaara laughs. "I can imagine it now."

"You shouldn't. I don't want to ruin you. Does…does Kankuro know it was me?"

"Absolutely."

"Damn."

"Don't beat yourself up… I'm free the rest of the afternoon. Can I show you around?"

Kakashi ruffles the redhead's hair. "I'd love that. Just let me drink some water first. It's hot in here."

Chapter Text

Years pass. Neither man leans in too far, lest he tip the balance of something already so good, to avoid the fear of ruin.

Both Kage know the value of a truly good friend…

"Lord Gaara," Ebizo greets at the weekly  Council meeting. "It's come to our attention that you have yet to find a wife. We've given you ample time to expand upon your family, but it seems you are not taking this matter seriously. What are we as your counsel to do?"

Gaara rests his chin on his folded hands and regards the elders with contempt clear in his eyes. He can feel Kankuro's worry emanating from him at his side.

"You are to let this matter go," Gaara warns.

"But how can we, when the Kazekage bloodline dies with you? Our very way of life hinges on what you do next."

"Then our ways will change," Gaara says simply. "There's no reason to hold me or anyone else hostage for a way of life that will not be relevant in 20, possibly 30 years' time. You've seen it as much as I—there is little place in this new world we are building for shinobi. The direction the future is headed, Kage may either be chosen as elected officials or may become completely irrelevant, and my hope is that one day we are no longer needed."

"You are a fool, to think people do not need a government to rule them," Ryusa says next.

"That is not what I said," Gaara says wearily, sitting upright in his seat.

"A distraction from the matter at hand," Ebizo says. "You have sixty days to find a wife or we will find one for you. We must keep the bloodline intact."

"No," Gaara argues.

"Why are you fighting the Council so hard on this, Lord Gaara?" Baki asks from the other side of him. "Is it not what every man wants, to settle down with a wonderful woman and create a loving family? You could have almost any woman you want."

"It is not what I want," Gaara says, folding his arms. "There are other ways to contribute to society without siring children, and I think you'll find I have done more than my part. You would all do well to remember that women are not objects; they are people. And there is no woman out there for me, but my heart is spoken for."

The Council erupts loudly.

"Are you trying to get yourself assassinated, Gaara?" Kankuro hisses at him through the din.

Gaara meets Kankuro's eyes. This is not the place to discuss this further.

"I'm done with this conversation," Gaara says, standing and dismissing himself from the table. "When you have something important to discuss, you know where to find me."

The Councilors stare, dismayed, as the Kazekage makes his exit and his older brother follows behind.

"You'll be thirty soon," Kankuro says.

"And you will be thirty-one," Gaara replies coolly. "What is your point?"

"Are you ever…you know, going to just tell him how you feel?"

Gaara stops in his tracks and sighs. "I think he knows, but what would I do? I don't wish to jeopardize our friendship. What we have is good. I don't think I'm built for something like what Temari and Shikamaru have."

"Are you fucking insane?" Kankuro asks him. "He's wild about you! He needs you to make the first move! It's been years, and if you love him, you have to be prepared to take a risk."

Gaara blinks at him, confused. "Where…where's this coming from all of a sudden?"

"What is the point of your heart being spoken for if you aren't going to do anything about it, huh? I'd kill to be head over heels for someone the way you are."

"...I am?"

"Yes, dummy. Just because you're Kazekage and he's Hokage it doesn't mean you both need to suffer alone. Besides, he's retiring very soon. You could have your very own house husband. Doesn't that sound nice?"

Gaara scoffs. "Be serious."

"I am, Gaara. Serious as a snake bite."

The brothers stare each other down. Then Kankuro shrugs and walks on ahead. "It's your life, Gaara. Do what you want. Just don't expect Lord Hokage to wait forever. You might miss your chance."

Gaara watches Kankuro's back retreat from him. He wonders…

That's how it all started.

"You're retiring soon, isn't that right?" Gaara asks over the phone.

Kakashi leans back in his chair, phone pressed to his ear. "Very soon. Naruto's inauguration is in less than a month. But you already knew about that. Why are you calling, Gaara?" Kakashi asks, savoring listening to the deep timbre of Gaara's voice.

"Where will you stay?" Gaara asks.

"Hm? I, well, I guessed I would live here, as I always have. Why? Is there a nice mansion with my name on it opening in Suna?" Kakashi teases. "Maybe I'd consider moving then."

"I…would like for you to be close," Gaara says quietly into his end of the receiver.

"Gaara…we should talk. Not now. Next time I see you."

The way Kakashi says those words fills Gaara's stomach with dread. It sounds as though he's about to deliver bad news, and he's not really ready to hear it.

"Speak of the devil, Naruto's here right now. Want to speak to him?"

"I would, but I have somewhere to be," Gaara replies. "Would you consider it, please?"

"Mhm."

Gaara hangs up the phone.

The wheels are in motion.

Naruto's inauguration day finally arrives, and Gaara wishes he could be there for it for his oldest friend. Gaara reads the highlights about it in the paper the next morning over breakfast before heading in to work.

He wonders, what did Kakashi want to speak to him about?

He hasn't heard from him since then. Not a hawk nor a phone call or a postman. That was three weeks ago, at least.

Kakashi's photo is in the paper, and Gaara traces it with a finger, lost in thought. He's standing behind Naruto and Hinata and the young children, giving a gentle wave.

It occurs to Gaara that he is being selfish. How could he possibly ask that of Kakashi? To leave his home, his friends, his comrades?

His people?

For what? So he can play house in some fantasy? He's never even kissed the man, even though he's fantasized about it countless times.

And then, what would the Council say?

He grimaces as he thinks of them and their demands of his life beyond his duty. He doesn't really care what the Council would say, not right now.

"My, you look depressed. Is everything alright?"

Gaara's head bolts upright from the newspaper at the sound of that warm voice.

"Ka-Kakashi? You're here?"

Kakashi's eyes squint and his hands are casually in his pockets. "For once I found myself free to do anything I wanted to do."

"You came…here?"

"I did." Kakashi's smile fades. "Apologies for not telling you in advance."

"I…I have to be at the office shortly," Gaara says. Then he smiles. "But it's so good to see you. Congratulations on your retirement."

"Thank you. It was long overdue."

"Where are you staying?"

"Here, if that's alright with you?"

"Of course it is," Gaara replies. It isn't the first time he's opened his home to him.

Gaara rises to his feet and approaches the former Hokage. He stops, leaving an arm's length between them.

"I've really missed you," Gaara says quietly. Why can't he just tell him what's really on his mind? Why not just reach for his mask and show him how he feels?

What holds him back. Is it fear?

"I missed you too." Kakashi's voice is soothing, and Gaara believes him.

"Dinner? After I am finished today?"

Kakashi nods. "That's a great idea."

When Gaara returns home from a long day at the office he finds Kakashi asleep, leaning back in a chair with his feet propped up on a chair in front of him, with a novel open and resting across his chest.

Gaara approaches him and reaches for his shoulder, shaking him gently. Kakashi groans and snores.

Gaara smirks and tries again. Still no luck.

Gaara gives up for the moment, and instead heads for his bedroom to dress more comfortably. When he returns, Kakashi is gone.

"Where'd he go?" he asks himself, looking up and down, quite baffled.

He smells something delicious coming from his kitchen and ambles towards it.

He smiles upon finding Kakashi searing something delicious in a pan, wearing his kitchen apron.

Gaara folds his arms and leans on a counter, but he is grinning from ear to ear.

"I didn't hire a personal chef," Gaara teases.

Kakashi turns to face him, crow's feet wrinkling at the corner of his scarred eye as he smiles. "I suppose you didn't. But I've been bored out of my mind on my first full day of retirement, you've had a long day, and I'm here to help. So shut up and eat," Kakashi replies, grinning beneath his mask.

Gaara can't complain. He sits at his table, and lets out a long sigh. "Please don't burn down my kitchen."

"Not fair! Last time I gently toasted your food."

"Is that what you call turning a lizard roast black?"

Kakashi laughs. "You got me there…" Then, more seriously, "Have a rough day at the office? Want to talk about it?"

"...It's been nothing I can't handle. I'm fed up with the Council though. They won't let go of the outdated notion that I need to produce an heir for the future of Suna."

Kakashi kisses his teeth. "Yeah, that sounds frustrating. So, what will you do?"

"I'm not sure. Burying them in sand isn't an option, though some days I wish it were."

Kakashi side-eyes Gaara from his cooking, listening carefully.

"What if there were other options? Are you open to hearing them?"

"...What do you mean?"

"What do you want for yourself, Gaara? You have so many aspirations for your country, but what is it that you need?"

Gaara frowns as he considers the question. "There's nothing I dislike about the way things are now. I enjoy my place in life."

"What if you aren't dreaming big enough? What if you could have more? What would your life look like?"

Gaara turns his attention to his table, stroking a finger along the wood grain.

"Dinner's ready," Kakashi hums, and when Gaara looks up he sets his plate before him.

"Thank you," Gaara says.

"Don't mention it."

Kakashi sits opposite him with his own plate.

"What I guess I'm trying to figure out is, where do I fit into your grand plan, Gaara?"

Gaara blinks as he takes his first bite.

Kakashi continues, "I'm retired now, and the rest of my life is an empty slate before me. I never thought I'd live this long but…I have. And I owe it to myself to be happy."

"I…I want you close," Gaara says hesitantly.

"Sure. You said that before. But what does that mean?"

"Kakashi…"

Kakashi sighs. "Look, if you want to say something, please say it. If there's something you want from me, please, I'm begging you, ask me for it. I have a decision to make. We have a decision to make, but we need to be honest with ourselves and each other."

Kakashi pointedly stares into Gaara's eyes. Then slowly, lifts his mask just enough to eat.

"What do you want, Kakashi?" Gaara asks quietly. "...This is delicious, by the way..."

"I want to stop playing games with you," Kakashi sighs. "I want to be with you, but I'm not sure how. You have to show me, if it's what you want too…and thanks. I hoped you'd like it."

"I want that. I want you." Gaara's heart thumps in his chest. He feels so vulnerable, so afraid.

Kakashi's hand stretches out to clasp over his. Gaara sets his fork down and gives him his full attention.

"I've never known you to be afraid to speak your mind, Gaara. Why am I finally hearing you say this now?"

Gaara closes his eyes, the kindness in Kakashi's eyes feels too much. "I think…some part of me thought that I could never deserve you."

"I don't want you to take this the wrong way…"

Gaara opens his eyes and meets Kakashi's dark ones. Kakashi rises to his feet, ignoring his meal, and pulls his mask back on. He walks towards the seated Kazekage.

"...but that is the stupidest thing I've ever heard you say."

Kakashi's hand rests on the back of Gaara's chair. He gazes down at him warmly.

The way Kakashi stares at him like that makes Gaara's belly feel like molten gold.

Fingers creep up Gaara's neck and tangle in the layers of hair at his nape. They tug against his scalp, and he gasps as Kakashi pulls his head back. Kakashi leans down but stops, gaze settling on Gaara's parted lips.

"Can I kiss you?" Kakashi asks, eyes flicking up to Gaara's for permission.

Gaara can hardly believe his ears. Is this really happening?

"Do you have to ask?" Gaara responds, reaching for Kakashi's face with both hands.

He presses his lips up to Kakashi's, savoring the sensation of fabric hot and damp against his mouth. He feels the outline of Kakashi's mouth, partially open, beneath his mask.

He doesn't mind the mask at all.

"Mm," Kakashi moans, and retreats. Gaara stands and follows the older man to a counter, where Kakashi stops and leans against it. He gathers Gaara's face in his hands.

He brushes his lips to Gaara's scar on his forehead.

"Don't stop…" Gaara purrs.

"My, how interesting…"

Gaara tilts his head just a fraction. "What is?"

"Your eyes. They're beautiful. I can see myself in them, but more importantly, when you're happy, they shine brighter. I've always suspected as much, but now I am certain."

Gaara crashes against Kakashi, pulling him tight, kissing him with over a decade's worth of pent up desire.

Kakashi weathers the storm, soothingly stroking his shoulders, back, and neck.

"...Our food is going to get cold…" Kakashi warns between kisses.

"Let it," Gaara growls, nipping the fabric of Kakashi's mask along his jaw with his teeth, feeling the brush of stubble against his lips and the sensitive skin below his nose.

"....ahh…" Kakashi sighs, relaxing into the younger man's intensity. "It seems I should have said something sooner."

Gaara ignores his comment, instead nuzzling cheek to cheek with Kakashi, and turns his neck against the shinobi's lips invitingly. "...I want you."

Kakashi doesn't miss a beat—he strings kisses along the column of Gaara's neck, moist and slightly scratchy, up to his jaw and earlobe. Kakashi nips at his ear and chuckles at the sharp intake of air it draws from Gaara.

Whatever plans they had for the rest of the evening dissolve quickly as they find themselves wrapped in each other's touch-starved embrace.

Clothes are removed and reassurances whispered. Gaara falls back on his bed, pulling Kakashi down on him.

How long has he waited? How long has he needed him like this?

Gaara whines, shifting into place after preparations have been made. When Kakashi sinks into him and steals his air there's no more room for doubt.

He pulls him close, wanting nothing more than to lose himself in rolling thunderclouds. He chases the storm, lightning and sand dancing together in a rare calm, charged by static in the evening atmosphere.

But that's not how the story ends. Not yet.

Sometimes, on rare occasions, everything falls into place as it is meant to.

A knock at the door startles Gaara and Kakashi both wake. Gaara groans as he untangled himself from Kakashi's arms and wraps himself in a robe, padding barefoot to his front door.

Two of his shinobi greet him.

"Lord Gaara, sorry to disturb you, but there's been an attack on the outskirts of the Land of Wind."

"An attack? Brief me on the way. Let me get ready."

Gaara returns to his bedroom, and Kakashi is unsurprisingly already out of bed, covering his chest with his shirt and flak jacket. The rest of him is already dressed.

"What is it? It sounds important."

Gaara begins to dress quickly, shimmying into his pants and belts.

"There was an attack. We should be prepared for a battle, just in case."

"Understood."

And without any words, it's also understood that Kakashi will follow. Both men return to the sentry.

"L-Lord K-Kakashi?" One of the shinobi stutters. The other elbows him in the ribs.

"Manners," he reminds the other.

Gaara rides through the desert on his sand as Kakashi runs abreast with him, as well as a team of twelve elite Sunan shinobi.

The moon is only a sliver tonight, and partially hidden by clouds. Despite the low light, billowing wisps of smoke are visible as they approach closer to the destination.

There are no flames.

"What could have done this?" One of the shinobi ask, awestruck.

"Whatever it is may still be there," Gaara replies. "Hold your positions."

Gaara closes one eye and covers it with index and middle finger. An orb of sand appears before him, and extends out of sight.

Kakashi stands close, keeping watch of their immediate surroundings as Gaara uses his unique gift.

The team waits, and waits. Gaara is silent as he concentrates.

Then he releases his eye, breaking the jutsu.

"Whatever did this, or whoever did it, is gone now. I didn't see any, but let's look for survivors."

The party remains solemn as they inspect the rubble. Dust and smoke hang in the air, but the sun is beginning to rise, creating a light haze that helps light their way.

"Gaara," Kakashi mouths from behind him. "I saw something move over there." He gestures in the direction. "I'll cover you."

Gaara knows he doesn't need protection, not here where he's in his natural element, but he doesn't argue. Having Kakashi near means he can protect him if necessary.

"Stand back!" Gaara shouts, now seeing a figure emerge from the wreckage.

The figure is small, but enshrouded in a cloud of something black and undulating. It almost looks like a swarm of insects.

"It's a child," Kakashi says, eyes wide.

"I see that now," Gaara replies. "I need you to stay here. I'll handle it." He gives Kakashi a quick nod before traversing the sand towards the child.

He doesn't make it far before the black swarm materializes into obsidian daggers, hovering near him in threat. But the child is in his sights now and he can see him clearly.

He's only a boy. Alone. Afraid. Somewhere between five and eight years of age, if he had to guess.

Gaara takes a tentative step closer, holding his hands out where they can be seen. The boy eyes him with wide, wild eyes.

The daggers strike as he comes too close. Gaara's sand rushes to defend, but Gaara gasps as his defense is overtaken and the daggers pierce his skin.

He grits his teeth and trudges forward. He's bleeding. He can't remember the last time he's bled.

The child stands his ground, staring up at Gaara with burning defiance.

"I want to help you," Gaara rasps. "Will you let me?"

The boy gasps as Gaara bridges the distance between them and wraps his arms around him.

"Shhh…you're safe. You're safe now."

The boy looks up, surprised.

"What's your name?"

"...Shinki…"

Gaara manages a smile, though his body is screaming.

"Shinki. I'm Gaara. I'd like to bring you to Suna, where you'll be safe and looked after. Would that be alright? We'll get you something nice to eat as soon as we get there."

Shinki nods his head, watching the man with awe. No one has ever stood through his defense before.

"Come with me," he says, holding out his hand. "Or if you'd rather, I can carry you, with my sand. Which would you prefer?"

"Sand…?" The boy is incredulous.

Gaara laughs gently. "Yes, see, I have a unique ability, much like yourself."

The boy takes Gaara's hand and they walk. Gaara watches him from the corner of his eye, seeing how he takes in the sights of his home having been completely destroyed.

He is quietly accepting of the fact. He doesn't cry.

Gaara feels a wave of relief when he sees Kakashi's outline in the haze. "My friend is up there, and there are others of us too searching for survivors. You're in good company."

Shinki doesn't say anything, but as they approach Kakashi, Shinki's eyes go wide in a panic. He pulls on Gaara's arm, trying to move him in the opposite direction.

"He's one of them!" Shinki cries.

Black fills Gaara's vision. It's iron, Gaara realizes.

"Stop!" Gaara cries.

Kakashi comes into view.

"That's my friend," Gaara reassures. "He won't hurt you."

Shinki is trembling now. "The attackers…they all had masks…just like his…" The iron remains still but poised for attack.

"They did?" Gaara asks.

"It's just a mask," Kakashi replies, voice warm and without threat. He crouches and to Gaara's surprise, he lowers the mask completely from his face.

"See?" he says, smiling kindly. "I'm here to make sure that no harm comes to you, or Gaara, or any other innocents."

Shinki is standing behind Gaara, gripping his pants at his thigh. He lowers the iron, and it gravitates and gathers around him like a shroud.

"It's alright," Gaara reassures once more. "Follow us."

Days later, no other survivors are found, and the circumstances surrounding the destruction of Shinki's home and village remain a mystery.

Gaara works tirelessly to get to the bottom of it, working late after hours to assist with recovery teams to retrieve whatever bodies remain for a proper funeral.

Kakashi suspects that he feels he owes the deceased that much.

Shinki has been staying at the Kazekage's mansion in his own comfortable room, under Kakashi's watchful eyes.

Late one evening, Kakashi pulls Gaara aside before he can leave once more to work himself to an early grave.

"Gaara…" Kakashi sighs, folding his arms and leaning against a wall. "As much as I like helping you, I am not making as much progress as I would like with this boy. He's scared, he's alone. I've been trying to connect with him but he needs someone like you."

Gaara deflates and turns to face Kakashi, his plans of leaving set aside for now.

"I owe it to him to locate the rest of his people."

"I don't see it that way at all…" Kakashi says. "...I don't think that's what he needs, not now, anyway."

Kakashi's eyes soften as he watches Gaara, just hardly perceptible, crack under his calm facade.

"How is he doing…?" Gaara asks, and Kakashi hears the guilt in his voice.

"Why don't you go ask him for yourself? He's been asking about you, you know."

"He has?"

"He's very interested in the man that saved his life. He told me himself. So, I've been telling him about who you are."

Gaara regards him thoughtfully.

"I've been looking into a possible home for him—a family that would be willing to take him in. But it seems…"

"Yes…?" Kakashi asks.

"I've thought about training him."

"He's got a lot of anger. I don't think he can be trained until he is more settled."

"Perhaps…"

"Yes…?" Kakashi wants him to come to the answer on his own.

"You told me years ago…you thought I'd make a good father. Is it crazy for me to consider adopting him?"

Kakashi brightens. "No, no Gaara. I don't think that's crazy at all."

Kakashi steps forward and grips Gaara's shoulder, and the younger man takes a step closer to him, gazing up with bright, wet eyes.

"I want so much for him…" Gaara whispers, voice trembling. "I wanted to find whoever is responsible for this. I didn't mean to…I didn't mean to neglect him."

"You haven't neglected him. But I do think you need to change your priorities. I can help you and Kankuro run the search. Shinki needs you at home."

Gaara lowers his head and grips Kakashi by his flack jacket.

"...What's this…? Gaara, I didn't mean to…"

Gaara buries his face into his chest and chokes back a sob.

"We'll find those responsible, Gaara, I swear it."

"It's…it's not that. I'm…a little overwhelmed."

"A little?" Kakashi chuckles softly, and kisses Gaara's forehead, then lower onto the bridge of his nose, as fat tears roll down black waterlines and down his cheeks.

"You think I could be a good father?" Gaara asks once more, wiping his eyes. "Mine wasn't the best role model."

"He doesn't need you to be perfect. He needs you to be you…and he needs your stability, and your calm, and your fairness and your respect, but most of all, he needs…"

"...What? What does he need?"

Kakashi smiles and points his finger to Gaara's scar. "He needs that warm heart of yours."

"Kakashi?"

"Yes?"

"When you took your mask off for him…I…I never have loved you as much as I did in that moment." Gaara sniffs and gazes up at him.

Kakashi's breathing hitches. He sees himself so clearly in the reflection of Gaara's glassy eyes.

"...and as much as I love you right now."

Gaara stands on his toes and pulls down Kakashi's mask, and pulls him close with both hands cradling either side of his blushing face.

"Mm, I love you too." Kakashi pulls him in deeper.

"...Lord Gaara…?"

Kakashi shudders from head to toe at being discovered.

But Gaara doesn't startle. He finishes his kiss slowly, stroking Kakashi's cheek and down to his lip with his thumb as he pulls away, lingering just a bit and capturing Kakashi's attention before turning to the child.

"Yes, dear Shinki?"

If the boy is surprised by the kiss he doesn't show it, nor does he seem to care.

"Will you stay here tonight? I don't want you to leave…"

Gaara kneels in front of the boy. "I'm not going anywhere tonight. I'm staying with you. You've got one hour until lights out—what would you like to do?"

"Read me a story…please?"

Kakashi nods when Gaara's eyes meet his. He leaves them to each other, and heads for the door.

"I'll be back soon," Kakashi calls from the doorway.

"Come home safe," Gaara says, smiling at him before turning his full attention to the child. Kakashi feels a shiver radiate through his body and makes the hairs on his arms stand on end. He can't shake how this feels like the call of destiny, even though he's not certain he believes in such things.

Today he is a believer.

Much later that evening, when Kakashi returns, he grins upon the sight that greets him.

Gaara has fallen asleep on the floor by the boy's bed. Their hands are joined. A small teddy bear is curled in Shinki's other hand.

Gaara's eyes slowly flutter open as Kakashi creeps near them on silent feet. "You're back?" he whispers.

Kakashi nods. "We got them. The attackers."

Gaara seems relieved. "Alive, or?"

"Dead."

"...Thank you."

"Certainly. Is the floor where you're sleeping tonight?"

Gaara observes his predicament and laughs quietly. "I suppose."

Kakashi removes his flack jacket and lays down beside him, draping an arm over Gaara's chest. He nuzzles into his warmth.

"I told him I want to adopt him. He seems pleased with the arrangement. I'll get started on the adoption papers tomorrow."

Gaara's smile is so peaceful. Kakashi isn't sure he's ever seen him so content.

"I'm very happy for you."

"And will you…stay close? Here, with us?"

Kakashi closes his eyes and seeks Gaara's surprised lips with his own before drawing back to whisper, "Yes, of course, for as long as you both need. I can think of no better way to spend my golden years..."

And that's how it happened. Sometimes the best laid plans all click into place, when no one is watching to understand how the pieces lay together until the design is complete.

As Kakashi drifts off to sleep, the carefree giggle of a young girl and boy echo in his mind and chase him in an open meadow, further into the calm of his dreams.