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Chapter Text

Zuko's head hurts. So does his everything else actually. He feels soaked. It doesn't take long to realize it's because he's in the water. Judging from the salty tang in his mouth he's in the sea to be exact and he has already swallowed some of it. Quickly, Zuko coughs out whatever he can and hopes it wasn't too much. You're not supposed to drink seawater he's pretty sure and his body is currently screaming in agreement. Zuko has no idea what's going on. Aside from the fire it's almost completely dark out too. At least he has this buoy to hold on to. 

Then a horrible smell assaults him, one that he knows. One seared into his mind and that he smelled on himself not too long ago: burned flesh. He's not holding a buoy, but his lieutenant, his lieutenant who is now dead judging by the lack of movement and the charred flesh he's holding onto. Zuko vomits and shoots away from the still-floating corpse. Then it hits him. He'd been arguing with the lieutenant just a moment ago, about how obviously his men couldn't slack off for a night in town. His banishment didn't come with any vacation why should theirs? But then he remembers a loud explosion and everything going white. 

The ringing in his ear so prominent he hadn't noticed it before it dissipates. He can hear the waves of the sea still trying to swallow him, along with the crackling of the fire softly in the distance. But then he hears screaming from the same place too, ever so faint but unmistakable. Zuko looks at where the sound is coming from and quickly regrets it. It's his ship. It's burning, it must have been caused by that explosion. He looks at the corpse, the vomit is more spread around it now. Jee's body probably took the brunt of the force of the blast that shot the both of them off of the ship which, by the looks of it, saved Zuko's life.

Zuko tries to swim against the waves towards his ship, hoping to find the other survivors. But all the while the screams only die out more and more. By the time his eyes adjust to the moonlight Zuko notices a bird circling the plumes of smoke and then a black shadow circling around the burning wreckage. It must be another ship, but its not making the signals for a rescue. Dread starts to set in. His men are dead. His ship is gone. They've been ambushed, or something. He'll need to hide from whoever the perpetrators were. He'll also need to get out of the water before he drowns. 

Zuko turns around swimming with the waves instead of against them. He is lucky he was blown out at flood tide. He'll need to make it to shore before ebb sets in. It's not long before he passes the corpse again. Zuko makes sure to give it a wide berth and keep his eyes forward. He's lucky, the beach is actually pretty close.

It's a small blessing, but he always had the worst luck.

His ship is still burning by the time he makes landfall, but Zuko has little chance to mourn the loss. It would have been nice to at least feel its warmth though. As it stands he's sopping wet, but there's little to be done about it. Fire might attract whoever blew up his ship. In fact they might spot him right now if he keeps standing along the white sand beach. Better to hide inland, so he runs into the canopy as he hopes the waves will wash away his footprints before daybreak.

Even out of sight Zuko, knows he's still not in the clear. He's getting cold, but he still doesn't feel confident making a fire here; he's thirsty, but he doesn't know how far he'll have to go for water; and he'd been ready to hit the hay before his ship got blown up, never mind now, but he knows he won't be able to sleep before he's warm and had something to drink. He'll need something to eat too, once his stomach stops being upset at turning itself inside out. Zuko doesn't have a particular destination in mind, the people at the harbour inside the bay could barely stand him as it was, he doubts they'll be more welcoming now he's even more powerless. So he keeps moving forward. Away from the sea that had been his home for the last year. It won't give him what he needs now. Anywhere further inland he'll have a better chance finding water fresh enough to drink and there'll be less chance his attackers will spot a fire. There'll be less of a chance those dirt eaters will recognize him too, should he come across any villages.

Zuko hasn't been walking too long, but by now the forest has gotten denser. He can only faintly hear the ocean with the sounds of the forest taking over, nor can he see much in front of him with so little moonlight protruding through the treetops. 

His feet hurt from walking through nature in wet boots for so long and he's getting so, so tired. The desire to sleep almost winning over his need to clench his thirst when he stumbles. He almost just rolls to his back and nods off then and there, but instead he musters up just enough willpower to get back up. Which he does without much pain, which is good because a sprained ankle would've been the icing on his Koh-damned shit-pie of a day. That's when he notices what it was he stumbled over: a coconut! He can just drink the milk and maybe even eat the flesh after. Two eel-doves with one rock, or however the saying goes.

Zuko picks up the fruit and shakes it to check for freshness. There's a sloshing sound, but does that mean the coconut is actually good or not? Zuko figures he'll find out soon enough. Then he looks around. Could a fire be spotted from this distance of the beach? Burning a hole would probably just leave the taste of ash in his mouth anyways. Prying open the coconut with his knife, thank Agni he'd taken to fastening uncle's gift to his boot like how Mai showed him to, was no easy feat between the darkness making it hard to see and the fact that the knife clearly wasn't designed for tasks like this.

But for once the Earth Kingdom's stubbornness to last comes to his benefit. The knife holds and and there's a hole in his coconut. Zuko's pretty sure some of the bark fell in. A few hours ago he wouldn't hold his nose up for it, but he's long past caring about such things. It's almost funny how things go: one day he's the crown prince and the next he's a castaway. 

Zuko takes a little sniff of the coconut's contents before gulping it down. For a moment it's the sweetest most refreshing taste he's ever had the pleasure of drinking, bark and all. 

His thirst not quite quenched, Zuko starts looking around for more coconuts, or maybe a rock to break open the one he finished already. He could try to open that one further with his knife, but it would probably just dull it further. He had barely maintained it since he got his swords.

Zuko can barely see his hand in front of him though, so he throws caution to the wind and sparks a fire. Wet as he still is, he'll probably be sick if he doesn't dry up soon and then it won't matter if they, whoever they are, find him.

A few empty coconuts and an ungodly amount of mosquito-leech bites later, Zuko's finally ready to lay down for the night. He wipes his knife clean. In the dim light of smouldering embers, the words inscribed on it seem to mock him. Never give up without a fight. Zuko thought he had learned that lesson last time, but this hadn't been much of a fight either.

Next time, Zuko thinks as he lays down his knife and closes his eyes, next time I'll make it one. 

Chapter Text

The sun awakes him far too soon for Zuko's liking. It's a shame too, he can't remember the last time he slept through the night.

Then Zuko feels the morning breeze and realizes he's not on his ship. Because he doesn't have one anymore, because his ship burned down and sank into the water and his crew with it. So now he’s been sleeping in the wilds wearing rags like some type of vagrant and it’s the best sleep he’s had in forever.

Immediately Zuko's back starts hurting again, but even moreso his everything itches. Those mosquito-leeches must have eaten him alive last night. In fact, Zuko instinctively slaps one that was biting him through his shirt leaving him with a disgusting smudge of blood and goo staining both his hand and clothes. 

Having nothing to clean himself with, Zuko begrudgingly tries to wipe his hand on the ground and gets a sting of pain through it for his trouble. He fails his hand wildly and flings off the red ant-wasp that had bitten into his hand before it can sting him too. Scampering upwards he does a quick look around revealing the little red pests crawling everywhere.

Zuko quickly scampers off. It would be just his luck for him to piss off a whole colony. There’s nothing Zuko hasn’t lost already that he wasn’t carrying on his person anyways. 

Having run off does make it more difficult for Zuko to figure out where he is. He probably should have properly gotten rid of those coconut shells instead of carelessly. Lu Ten always told him it would attract pests when his cousin had taken him camping years ago. Zuko hadn’t wanted to go at first and then he ended up having so much fun he hadn’t wanted to leave either. Lu Ten had promised Zuko he’d take him again once he returned from the campaign. Later Zuko had cried in his mothers arms saying he’d give everything to go on one of those trips again. 

Him and his big mouth…

Zuko can’t figure out if he wants to laugh or cry, so he tries to think about what to do next. He’s hungry. Coconut’s alright, but it's not exactly filling. At least it helps with the thirst, he'll probably need water eventually though. Fresh water, he probably swallowed enough saltwater yesterday to last him a lifetime. Well, he needed to get away from the sea anyway. He should probably keep moving inland. Maybe he'll come across a river or something and along the way he’ll find some food?

It doesn’t sound like much of a plan, but Zuko doesn’t know what else to do, only that he doesn’t want to stay where he is, so he starts walking. Along the way he does find more coconuts, he finds other fruits too, but he doesn’t recognize any of them, so he stays away. What if they’re poisonous? There’s lots of animals too, and Zuko tries to chase them. He should be able to roast the meat with his firebending and then they should be fine to eat right?

But Zuko can never get one with his knife; the animals keep running away from him. Eventually Zuko hits one with his firebending, but then the small thing keeps running. Zuko still has to run while he tries to catch up and all the while the creature's screams are so loud and when Zuko finally does catch it he doesn’t know how to actually kill it. For his trouble Zuko is left chewing on something that's more burned skin and hard bones than anything edible and until he bites into something that tastes so much like shit it has him immediately throw up. Probably because it was shit he realizes belatedly, vaguely remembering something Lu Ten told him about cleaning out the innards when preparing a fish.

“I hate this!” Zuko yells at himself, because he knows no one is listening anyway. And if he cries, does it really count if nobody is watching? Lu Ten told him once that trees in a forest don’t fall unless there’s someone to see it happen, or something like that.

Whatever didn’t happen. Zuko doesn’t waste much time before he starts walking again. He’s too nauseous now to really feel hungry, but he knows he should be finding something to eat. He’ll need his strength to fight.

Zuko is following an uphill path, but he doesn’t mind so much. Maybe when he gets to the top he’ll be able to look ahead and figure out where to go from there. When the sun starts to go down. Zuko hunts down another animal. He also finds what he’s pretty sure are bananas. They must have been very unripe or something though, because they were small and green; and the insides had these huge seeds. The flesh of the fruit is very bitter, but it doesn't make Zuko want to throw up, so he decides it must not be poisonous. This time he guts the insides of the animal after cooking it, throwing out anything that doesn’t look like meat. There’s not a lot of it though, so some of the organs(?) Zuko gives a little bite before deciding if they're worth eating or not.

When he's finished Zuko makes sure he burns anything didn’t end up eating. The smoke coming from the fire irritates his nose, but at least there’s less insects bugging him come nightfall. And when he goes to sleep that night he does so a little less thirsty and a little less hungry than how he woke up.

Chapter Text

When, the next day, Zuko does find a river, the bugs almost make him regret doing so. They’re everywhere here. The buzzing invades his thoughts. He can’t think straight. Can’t not be on the lookout for them. The mosquito-leeches leave disgusting smears everywhere . Still they manage to bite him, through his clothes! And then there’s the itching. Zuko’s whole body feels like one giant bug bite. There’s some parts where he’s more swelling than skin.

It gives Zuko half a mind to just burn it all down and the rest of his surroundings aren’t helping.. The banks of the river are a muddy mess and Zuko nearly loses his boots stepping into them and when he does get to the water it’s not even clean! There’s algae and slimy plants coming out of the soil and there’s dirt and who-knows-what floating in the water. Zuko has to cup his hands in the river to drink water that’s at least somewhat clean. It’s unfair, even peasants at least have cups to drink out of.

Once he has satiated his thirst Zuko wants nothing more than stomp away and forget about the muddy river, but there is something else he needs. He needs to wash his clothes. It’s his third day since his ship got blown up and his clothes still carry the salty tang of the ocean’s scent and all the sweating he’s done along with dead bug smears staining his clothes haven’t helped with that. What’s more: his boots are caked with mud and Zuko’s pretty sure some has gotten inside.

He could use a wash himself too really.

With his next goal in mind. Zuko follows the river upstream until he comes across a clearing where the river is deeper and the riverbanks are rocky rather than muddy.

While undressing himself Zuko reluctantly takes off his underwear too. The thought of some peasant witnessing him in such an undignified state is mortifying, but there's nothing to be done about it.

Last of all Zuko takes off the hairpiece keeping his phoenix plume in place. It's gotten a few new blemishes since the last time he held it in his hands, but that's hardly surprising. Zuko probably should have cleaned it after coming out of the saltwater, though there's nothing to be done about that either.

Still, as Zuko polishes it the hairpiece regains some of its former shine. Anyone who knows what they're looking at would still be able to recognize it as belonging to royalty. 

Which is probably why he shouldn’t be wearing it. If any Earth Kingdom peasants saw him with it, they might kill him for it. If they recognized him as the prince they would definitely kill him.

It's probably for the best that hardly anyone would recognize him as royalty in his current state. Well, unless they recognized his face.

Zuko has been trying not to think too hard about that.

Washing himself is hardly a princely affair. The water is much too cold and his feet end up standing in a gooey substance Zuko would rather not think about. He doesn't have any soap and by the end he feels more like swamp than actually clean, but at least he got to wash the bulk of the sweat and grime off of his skin.

His clothes are a similar story. Turns out there's more to washing than the servants make it look. Zuko's sure that if he had good, clean and warm water along with whatever kind of soap people used for clothes then he'd get those stains out of clothes. Definitely.

When Zuko thinks he's finally all done. There's still the matter of drying all those clothes, which… he ends up laying them on some mostly clean rocks for them to dry in the sun.

Zuko grumbles. That will take forever .

He ends up looking for wood naked, like some kind of caveman, but at least with this way he won't have to waste the day away waiting for his clothes to dry. As an added bonus: there's less insects once the fire gets going.

While waiting for his clothes to dry and with nothing better to do. Zuko takes one of the larger sticks he gathered and uses his knife to make a point out of one of the ends. 

With his new spear Zuko takes to fishing and after much waiting and many failed attempts he finally gets a decent catch.

When his clothes are finally dry enough to put on Zuko eyes his hairpiece one more time. He really could get in trouble if he was seen with it. He sighs, reluctantly pocketing it. 

Looking at his reflection in the water he finds himself looking ridiculous. Even aside from the scar he already had a slight fuzz growing on his scalp and the patch he’d allowed for his phoenix plume just looked stupid without anything to hold it up. 

There is no point in shaving his scalp, even if Zuko thought he would want to try that with the one knife he uses for everything else, because if no one can know who he is, then there’s no reason for anyone to know he lost an Agni Kai.

Holding his strand of uncut hair, he quickly finds some sticks and leaves stuck in it. If he can’t even wear his hairpiece to hold it up, he can hardly call it a phoenix plume anymore. 

Maybe that’s fitting. Reduced to living like some kind of wild man, can Zuko really say he has any honour left? 

Zuko grabs his knife and cuts his hair off, throwing it in the river and watching it wash away.

He may have lost his honour for now, but that’s fine he’ll figure something out. He’ll get himself out of this mess and capture the Avatar. Then, he’ll have his honour back, just like how he’ll regrow his hair.

By the time Zuko has finished his meal there’s still a few more hours in the day so he decides to trek a bit further up along the river, making sure to make camp some distance away from the water to hopefully avoid the bugs.

He sleeps soundly that night, dreaming of his triumphant return back home.

Chapter Text

The next day Zuko finds a spot where the river splits off into two streams, making the next bit upstream a little wider than before. Not long after he comes across a rundown path and then a field where he sees a man working in the fields. Seeing another person after an amount of days Zuko cares not to count is more relieving than it has any right to be. Zuko is still a prince. He won’t go and frolic with some peasant.

The man working the field is eyeing Zuko suspiciously anyhow, so Zuko ignores the man and keeps walking. Not long after he finds a house, probably the man’s, and there’s something resembling a road. Tired of wandering in the woods for the last few days, Zuko decides to follow it.

Zuko doesn’t really know where he’s going, but wherever it is it’s better than staying on a half abandoned road. To the Avatar, eventually. It will be tough to find him, harder than it was before now that Zuko doesn’t have a ship, but he’ll figure something out. He has to. For now he’ll just go to a small town or a village. Somewhere he can get new supplies for his search, but without too many people. Someone might still be looking for him and Zuko doesn’t want to deal with that right now.

Zuko would like to ask for directions, maybe there’d even be rumors related to the Avatar for him to follow. There are a few more houses scattered along the road, but all day the people Zuko comes across give him the same kind of looks the farmer from earlier gave him.

The next day Zuko arrives at a village. It's small and rundown. More a sorry collection of scrap wood than true civilisation. But at least there is a small market with a smell of food that is surprisingly enticing. There is little harm in simply taking a look. It would be nice to have a proper meal.

Ignoring the stares of the locals Zuko lets his nose lead him to a promising food stall. He just made his order when suddenly the vendor clears his throat and looks at Zuko expectantly.

Oh right. Money. Zuko didn’t have that anymore. As a child he could have basically anything he wanted, so long as it wasn’t too “improper”. Having to account for the cost of things had been a bit of a shock to the system. After a few mishaps Zuko had begrudgingly agreed to let his Lieutenant handle the financial side of things. Zuko would still look over the numbers of course. He knows what it should cost to feed a small crew.

How does that translate into a single meal again?

“Listen kid,” the seller says, “if you don’t have any money then scram. I don’t do charity, especially for the likes of you.”

“What's that supposed to mean?”

“I'm saying I don't have much goodwill left in me for yer kind ya hear?”

These peasants, how dare they! Zuko’s got half a mind to shove his knife in the man's face and show him just how much goodwill he ought to have for Zuko’s kind.

But then Zuko notices the eyes on him. It isn't just him and the seller. There’s other villagers watching. People behind him standing in line, an old lady watching from the windowsill, burly farmers bringing in the day's haul.

Being of royal pedigree Zuko of course has full confidence he could take these people on, but doing so would be… tedious. Not worth his time.

That was the only reason Zuko slowly and calmly backed off and moved on from the village.

By the time Zuko has finished dinner. — Yet again fish he caught in the river, no fruit this time. He couldn’t find any along the road. — It strikes him these people might not trust him because he looks Fire Nation. After all his is clothes are red and theirs are all green. It must be an Earth Kingdom thing. Zuko had seen a few people dressed like that in the ports he would occasionally dock his ship for supplies and repairs, though most of the colonials there wore brown.

If this keeps up, even in more civilized places, Zuko might have to steal some of these peasant’s clothing to blend in. It’s not something he would have usually resorted to, but needs must.

After all, why shouldn’t he steal? He is the prince! These peasants should bow down and thank him for the privilege! It doesn’t matter that they’re Earth Kingdom. It will soon all be Fire Nation anyways. In fact: that these barbarians keep resisting their own civilization is proof that Zuko is more deserving of their belongings than them and if they hadn’t resisted, then there wouldn’t even have been a need for the war and there wouldn’t have been a war meeting during which Zuko could have spoken out. There wouldn’t even have been a need for father to give Zuko a task as important as finding the Avatar if the war was already won! So really that fact that Zuko is banished is these Earth Kingdom peasants’ fault! They’re the reason Zuko has nothing more to his name right now than the clothes he’s wearing!

Besides, Zuko thinks as he makes his bed, it’s not theft. He’ll just be taking what he deserves.

So while the next few days Zuko ends up following the various rundown roads and avoids the various villages along the way, at night Zuko ends up not stealing, taking a lot. He never gets caught of course, he’s always been good at this sort of thing. Going places he shouldn’t. Not being seen. Zuko would call it child's play, but frankly stealing his toys back from Azula had been a lot harder.

First it’s clothes, easily snatched from someone stupid enough to let them out to dry overnight; then a bag to carry those clothes, that’s harder, then a mask – something to hide his face – then money. Money is harder to find. Most houses he breaks into only have a little. It shouldn’t have surprised Zuko that such backwards people are so poor. The only reason he’s not stealing more is because it's starting to weigh him down.

But that’s fine. Zuko can just take more according to his needs. It’s like a tax. Everything the peasants have is essentially the property of the royal family, its just that they’re gracious enough to let them pay out over time. All Zuko is really doing is cutting out the middle man. No-one likes tax collectors anyway.

Finally feeling good about himself Zuko enters the next decrepit village with a spring in his step. He ignores the looks of the peasants and makes a beeline for the nearest enticing food stall. He picks his order and lets a gold coin fall on the countertop with a satisfying clunk. If the food is as good as it looks Zuko might even allow the vendor to keep the change, he’s in a gracious mood after all.

“How’d ya get that gold kid?” the vendor asks Zuko. Instead of giving him the food he ordered.

“What does that have to do with anything?” Zuko asks, his mood ruined, “I’m paying you with it aren’t I?

The vendor raises his hands. “Oh well in that case~” he says in a mocking tone, before crossing his arms, turning serious, “You’re gonna have to add another gold one kid.”

“What!?” Zuko shouts, outraged at the blatant attempt to swindle him, “On the sign it says two bronze!”

“Wow, someone taught a kid like you how to read?” the vendor laughs, “Well here’s another lesson for you kid, free of charge: Crime doesn’t pay, especially for an ashmaker’s kid like you.

“What did you just say.”

“Exactly what I did.” the vendors says defiantly, “Look around you kid and put that knife away. You really think people will just stand around and let you rob them blind?

Zuko looks dumbfounded at the knife in his hand. When had he–

“I wasn’t~” Zuko sputters as he put his knife away. “Forget it! I’ll just buy from someone else.”

Then he walks off. Just like last time.

“Han, did you really need to antagonize him off like that? He was just a boy. Everyone knows you let people haggle down to half the written price.”

“So what if I do? Those prices are for honest hardworking Earth Kingdom folk, not thieving snakes like him. Kid wants to earn his keep so bad he can fight in the war and help defend the Kingdom from his own kind, not rob our neighbours blind and expect a fair price. He’s lucky I didn’t turn him in.”

Zuko ignores the vendor’s argument with his wife as he starts leaving town when suddenly he finds himself staring at the second reason as to why he might wanna stop stealing.

There's a wanted poster of him.

Well not him, it doesn’t have his name or his picture. But it lists his thefts, roughly his height, his blue spirit mask.

Zuko fights the urge to grab his mask out of his sack to compare it.

Should he have gotten a less distinctive mask?

No. It’s irrelevant what kind of mask he wears, so long as it’s not too impractical the only thing that matters is that people don’t see the person behind the mask. Besides, Zuko was only replacing the one he took out of his mother’s collection that had likely sunk with the rest of his ship. It’s not like some uncultured earth rabble would know how to properly appreciate it. They clearly have no regard for the fine arts around here. The shoddy craftsmanship on the mask alone is proof enough of that.

It doesn’t matter. Zuko rips his wanted poster off of the post and puts it in his sack before leaving town. These people are too stupid to figure out its him. That food vendor just made a lucky guess. Zuko’s not going to get caught. He just needs to keep a move on. It’s not like he’s gonna find the Avatar here anyways.

Zuko’s stomach growls.

Some food would’ve been nice though.

Zuko doesn’t sleep well that night and he ends up waking early. To Zuko's dismay his feet still hurt from the day's prior. By the time the sun’s started to rise he comes across a farm. He hadn’t had any luck finding food up till then. The thought strikes him to just take something from the farm. Earth Kingdommers are obviously too lazy to get up in the early dawn. Not that Zuko sees anything to take but wheat, but wheat is used to make bread right? Zuko could probably figure out how to do that. How hard could it be?

“Hands off kid, that isn’t grass.”

Zuko retracts his hand as he snaps toward the old man who called him out and tries not to feel chastened. He didn’t do anything wrong.

The old man frowns. “Those clothes are military, how did a kid like you get them? Stole ‘em off a corpse?” then he looks Zuko up and down seemingly noting every rip and tear in his clothes, “Looks like it.”

“I didn’t steal anything,” Zuko defends, his confiscated clothes had gotten grimy, so was wearing his regular clothes. Not like he was planning to visit any villages anytime soon.

“So what? You telling me them ashmakers are conscripting kids now? I can’t even say i’m surprised.” The burly old man says, rubbing his chin as if in considering the matter, “Guess they must be getting desperate. They sending kids like you out as scouts or something?”

“What?” Zuko asks, trying to remain calm. He knows what they do with captured soldiers in the Earth Kingdom and he prefers his hands stay whole.

“I have nothing to do with them.” Zuko denies.

“Oh so you’re a runner? Well, I can't blame ya. Not too fond of them ashmakers myself.” the man laughs, waving his arm which ends in a scarred stump where the hand should be.

A burned stump.

“Yeah some fire benders tried to give me a taste of our own medicine,” the old man explains like it was nothing of consequence. Then he laughs to himself. “Joke was on them though…”

The old farmer seems to look at something else as he says that, though the strange man doesn’t move his gaze. For a split second Zuko is filled with the urge to walk away, but just then the old man’s focus returns.

“Oh don't look so sad about it.” the mans tells Zuko, “We're hardly the only two that match around here. Tell ya what. I could use a hand to help with the farm and you look like you could eat a meal or three. How about it? You wanna take that deal?”