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Chapter Text

It has been two weeks since Harry stumbled into Louis’ flat, while he was about to leave. Two weeks since Louis was not only hit by the door, but also by confusion as Harry profusely apologized while Louis could only stare at him. The thing was, Harry was beautiful. Effortlessly so with his luscious long curls and adorable frown, sharp jaw, yet kind eyes. It was the first time Louis noticed such a thing about a boy.

Louis was sure it was simply a normal thought. One could appreciate Harry’s looks. It was obvious.

After the first awkward moment, things were easy. Harry as it turned out, was Louis’ new roommate. He was the most considerate roommate Louis has ever had. He seemed to be perfect in every way and they developed an easy friendship. It was so easy to make Harry laugh. They grew close so quickly, even Zayn called Louis out on it. He finally introduced the two and for a while, Louis thought Zayn simply couldn’t stand Harry. He kept looking at the two of them weirdly. Niall kept smirking at them as well, but differently to Zayn, he seemed quite happy about the new addition to their group. Zayn though… was worrying Louis.

“Louis, can I talk to you for a sec? Alone please?”, he said, when the two wanted to head back to their room.

Louis looked to Harry.

“Sure, go ahead, I’ll just be in the flat.”

So louis had stayed behind with Zayn.

“I don’t really know how to say this, Lou, so I need you to just listen to me for a second, okay?”, Zayn started, a slight frown between his eyebrows.

“Do you not like him?”, Louis worried.

“No no no, that’s not it at all, I promise, he is great. It’s just, I’ve never seen you let someone in so quickly. You needed to be in my class for two years until you told me you had four sisters and now this? You touch each other all the time and he seems to know so much about you already. It’s been two weeks darling. What’s going on?”

And... if that didn’t hit the nail on the head for Louis. It wasn’t like him and that has been confusing him for past two weeks.

“Zayn, I … I don’t know. I know I don’t do this. But I also know that Harry just makes me feel comfortable. He calms me down. I just feel like, whenever I talk to him my thoughts quiet down somewhat. And when he hugs me, I just… I feel home. I can trust him. He doesn’t judge me. I can talk to him about how much I miss my girls and mum and he just listens and hugs me and I feel a little more home. And when he’s not there, he’s the first person I want to talk to about my day and it scares me how much I just want to text him about everything and now you’re saying I’m acting weird and I just don’t know what’s going on with me anymore!”

A lone tear started running down his cheek and Zayn just took him into his arms.

“Oh darling. That so good though. I am so happy he’s good for you. Have you considered… I’m sorry if I’m wrong, but have you considered the reason he makes you feel that way is, that you feel more than friendship for him? You guys can’t seem to stop touching each other, so I just thought…”

“What!?” The truth was, Louis hadn’t considered it. He’s never felt this way about a boy in his 24 years of living and now he’s suddenly attracted to one? That couldn’t be…

“Darling, you don’t need to know right now. Take your time, just sometimes you might miss out on good things, because you believe it isn’t possible. You can always talk to me about it, but just don’t deny yourself something great, because you’re stubborn as hell.”

“I… I really hadn’t thought about him like that. I know he’s gay, he said as much, but I never thought I could feel that way about a guy. I don’t even know if I feel about Harry that way. I only know that he’s amazing and I feel really comfortable with him. Actually, can I just go? I just, I need some time. Thank you though. Love you Zayney!”

“I love you, too!”

Louis finally stepped out of Zayn’s hug and started heading towards his flat. His thoughts were all over the place and the only person he knew he wanted to calm them down right now was Harry so he went straight to his room. When he stepped through the door, Harry immediately looked concerned.

“Lou are you alright?” He stepped up and walked towards Louis, lifting his hand to his face as if to make sure Louis wasn’t hurt. Of course he already knew something was up and Louis was suddenly very aware of Harry’s hand cupping his jaw and caressing his cheekbone.

“Haz, can you just.. I just need a hug right now.”

“Of course, baby!” Harry immediately put his arms around Louis waist, so he could hug him around his shoulders and bury his face in his neck. Baby. It sounded so soft, so normal. As if it was what Louis should have always been called. Louis started crying and buried deeper into Harry’s shoulder, holding on for dear life and taking a deep breath of his smell. It immediately calmed him down a little and Harry tightened his arms around him as if to tell him, he’s there.

“You’ll be okay.” Harry said when Louis finally started to calm down a little. “I think you need to lay down baby, have a nap.”

There it was again. Baby. Louis did need a nap, but he also needed to be held by Harry. “Okay, but don’t let me go, please.”, Louis begged into Harry’s shoulder.

“Alright, just lie down with me right here. Come on. “

Harry lied down on his back, Louis at his side, using his chest as a pillow. It was weird, how quickly he fell asleep. When he woke up again, still in the same position, both Harry and him still in their jeans, it seemed to be morning already. They must have slept through the whole night. Louis looked up slightly and found Harry still sound asleep, face turned toward Louis, one arm around his back, the other softly holding his head. It screamed affection. Louis knew that. He knew he was important to Harry and Harry was important to him. Hell, every time Louis talked to his mum, he seemed to talk about how nice it was living with Harry and having found such an amazing new friend. Harry might even be his best friend. Not in the way Zayn was, though. His friendship with Zayn was years old. Zayn will always be his confidant.

Harry though… Harry made him feel different. Maybe Louis always knew that Harry was different and simply didn’t want to admit it to himself. The way they touched each other, so carefully, so caring, yet teasing each other constantly. Harry holding him like he just wanted to keep him safe even while being asleep, he knew it was not what friends did. He knew and yet, he didn’t understand it. It was as if Harry made him feel like a completely different person. Like he didn’t know himself anymore, not his current self though. Harry made him feel, like he was finally himself. Who has he been for all those years though?

Suddenly, Harry’s grip tightened around Louis and he finally blinked awake. Louis quickly put his head back on his chest, feeling caught.

“Morning”, Harry said, lightly scratching Louis scalp where he was holding his head. “Are you feeling better today?”
“A little, yes, thank you for being there for me.”

“Of course, always! Did you want to talk about it?”

Talk? Louis didn’t even know what to say. He didn’t even fully understand what he was thinking, feeling and he especially didn’t want to ruin their friendship. He didn’t think it would, now being pretty sure that whatever it was he was feeling, Harry was feeling it, too.

“No, not yet.” He replied. “Maybe someday, but not soon.”

“Okay Lou, I’ll always listen though.”

“I know.”

Chapter Text

After Louis’ little breakdown, Harry seemed to want to comfort Louis constantly, always softly touching him somewhere, always looking at him with such softness and caring, Louis didn’t even know what to think of it. Other than that, not much has changed. Except. Louis found himself paying attention to everything Harry did. To everything HE did. Like the way he was out at a pub with Zayn, Niall and his previous roommate Liam, and of course, Harry. He and Harry had arrived together and headed straight to the bar to order a round of drinks for everyone.

“Where do you want to sit?” Harry had asked as soon as they got their drinks and did he think there was even a question about that? “Next to you.” Louis had replied immediately and Harry just gave him the biggest dimpled grin as if just sitting next to Louis was the best thing in the world. Damn those Dimples, really. He looked so cute whenever he showed them to Louis and all Louis wanted to do was touch them, so he did. He just poked his finger into Harry’s dimple, and he just threw back his head in a loud laugh. It was the most beautiful laugh in the world and Louis wanted to hear it all the time. These thoughts seemed to come to him more and more often these last few days and Louis started to expect them, he still felt weird thinking it, though.

So drinks in Hand and Harry still laughing next to him, they headed to the booth and greeted the others.

“We come bearing drinks, guys!”, Louis announced and Niall just cheered while Liam looked at Louis, who didn’t grab one of the beers, instead grabbing himself a simple coke. “You not drinking tonight, Tommo?” He asked. Liam had recently finished uni, hence leaving his room to Harry, who was somehow a family friend of Liams mum.

“Yeah… I umm I have a project to finish tomorrow and don’t want to be hungover.” “Ahhh that sucks.” Liam replied, oblivious Louis had just lied to his face. He was a really great guy but always a little naïve when it came to being lied to. Harry though sensed Louis discomfort immediately and put a hand on his thigh in a comforting manner. He knew not to ask, since he imagined it had something to do with whatever Louis wasn’t telling him. He wasn’t wrong. Louis was scared. Scared of his own thoughts, of his growing affection for Harry and of the things he might do if he lost control. He couldn’t lose control. What would it mean for him? Did he actually like Harry that way? He looked to Zayn who was giving him a questioning eyebrow and almost imperceptibly tilted his head towards Harry, silently asking if their conversation about him was the reason. Louis gave him a small nod to which Zayn responded with a comforting smile.

“Ahhh I’ll just drink for ya Tommo!”, Niall responded in typical fashion. “Harry, you up for shots?”

Harry hesitated a moment and glanced at Louis out of the corner of his eye. “No, I’ll switch to coke after this. Don’t want to leave Lou as the only sober one.” Harry said cheekily, but Louis could feel the seriousness in his voice and smiled at him gratefully.

“The two of you, I swear! You’re attached at the hip lately, it’s adorable! If I didn’t know our Tommo here was the straightest person I know, I’d seriously think you guys were dating.!”, Niall laughed, causing Louis to tense against Harry’s side. Fuck. Was it that obvious? First Zayn and now Niall? Harry could feel him tense and whispered in his ear: “Are you okay?”

Louis couldn’t look at him. He just stood up. “I’ll head for smoke, guys!” He didn’t wait for a response and simply squeezed out of the booth and practically ran outside, leaning against the brick wall trying to breathe. The truth was, they did act like a couple. Their friendship was portrayed by constant PDA, so it shouldn’t be bothering him this much, to be called out like that. The implication of him and Harry as a couple was not the part that scared him though. It was the word straight. Niall thought he was straight. Everyone did. Even Louis did. He wasn’t so sure anymore. What scared him the most was, that he seemed to be a different person entirely, that he spent his life being someone he wasn’t and if people found out who he truly was, they might feel like was lying to them.

As if sensing he was needed, Harry suddenly stepped outside. “Do you want to be alone?”, he asked and reached up to caress Louis’ cheek. “Not really.” Louis was grateful Harry was there. He just needed to feel like himself and Harry always seemed to give him that feeling, so he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Harry’s waist, burying his face ins the taller boy’s chest. Harry simply held him and started carting through his hair, swaying side to side a little. “What do you need?” What did Louis need? Apparently the answer was Harry. He seemed to be the answer to everything lately. “

“I need to go home.” And so they did.

They walked side by side silently, about a foot of space between them. The silence was comforting. It allowed Louis to think while not feeling alone.

He thought about the day he met Harry.

How his beauty left him speechless.
His kind, green eyes, the soft, long curls on his head and his tall lean body.
The way he started learning that Harry was not only beautiful on the outside, but also on the inside.
How he couldn’t seem to be too far away from him, always touching in some capacity.

It was then that he felt Harry lightly caressing his hand. That was something they have never done before. They hugged, yes and that one night Louis fell asleep in Harry’s bed, they even cuddled, but they never held hands.

Louis felt the small touch in his entire body, could feel his hearts speeding up and his hand tingling where Harry was touching it. Louis couldn’t help but slowly thread their fingers together and as Harry squeezed his hand and smiled at him, he felt like this was where his hand belonged. Louis felt like he was drowning in Harry’s gaze. He looked at him with longing and what seemed to Louis like it might become love.

But what if Louis couldn’t give that back to him? What if he was too scared to take the leap and find out what it was he really felt for Harry? His breathing started getting faster and panic was overcoming him. Harry’s look immediately changed to concern. He snatched his Hand back, as if he was burned.

“I’m so sorry Lou, did I do something wrong? Whatever it was I’m so sorry!”, Harry worried. Louis couldn’t believe he was apologizing when it was Louis who should apologize. A strangled sob escaped his lungs, and he started crying.

“What’s wrong? Louis please, baby, tell me what I can do! Come on, let’s get you inside!”

Louis didn’t even realize they had reached their flat and stood still, hugging himself while Harry unlocked their door. He hesitantly reached out to pull Louis inside and Louis just felt terrible for making Harry scared of touching him. He couldn’t have that. He needed to tell him. Tell him why he was this scared and that he never wanted Harry to stop touching him. Louis started walking the stairs in front of Harry and when they reached the door to their flat, he looked to Harry and simply said: “I’ll tell you. I’ll tell you everything.”

That seemed to relieve at least a little bit of Harry’s tension. He was still worried though. “Can we sit down in your room?”, Louis asked, wanting to feel as close to Harry as possible for this conversation.

“Of course, anything you need.” Harry sat down first, so to show Harry he didn’t do anything, Louis sat as close to him as possible and reached out to grab Harry’s hand. The same feeling of belonging overcame him again, making tears well up in his eyes once more.

“Take your time, it’s okay.”, Harry encouraged, while he started softly running his thumb over Louis knuckles.

Louis nodded, trying to figure out how to start this conversation, keeping his eyes locked on Harry’s hand in his own. He took a deep breath.

“We’re more than just friends, aren’t we?”, he asked. Harry didn’t seem surprised, rather like he expected the conversation to be headed towards that topic. He did seem surprised to be asked a question, though.

“Umm…”, he stuttered. “I mean, you are definitely more important to me than most friends. I really like you Lou and I think we could be really great together, but I don’t want anything that you don’t want, so if you only want me to be your friend, then that’s what I’ll be.”

Lous had suspected as much. Finally, he looked up into Harry’s caring green eyes. “I think I want to be more though.” A tear ran down his cheek. “But I’m so scared.” He started sobbing again. Harry just leaned forward and put his arms around Louis, safely encompassing him. “Oh, baby…”

Louis grabbed onto Harry’s jumper like his life depended on it and tried to keep explaining though his tears.

“It’s all so new to me. I’ve never felt like this before and I don’t know what’s going on with me. It’s like I haven’t even known who I am all my life and I feel like I’ve been lying to myself and everyone else, but also I didn’t know! I didn’t know and I still don’t and I am just so scared, but what I do know, is that I feel safest, when I’m with you, Haz. You make me feel safe.”

Harry pressed a soft kiss into Louis’s hair. “Shhh it’s going to be okay, baby. I know it’s scary and it feels like your world is turning upside down, but you’re still the same Louis you’ve always been. It doesn't change who you are, just who you might be with someday. That doesn't mean you’ve been lying to anyone. And if you want, if it helps you, we can talk about it and maybe figure some of it out together. It doesn't even have to mean that anything is going to happen between us, but I want you know that I am here for you, whenever you want. We can talk and do whatever you want at your own pace.”

“Thanks Haz, it means the world to me. And I do want to talk. I think I need to, actually.”

“Alright, then we’ll talk. Do you want to lie down and cuddle, like last time? Would that help?” Harry looked down at him and put a strand of his fringe behind his ear, cupping Louis’ jaw and stroking his cheek. Louis just nodded and moved towards the headboard, waiting for Harry to lie down and open his arms for him. Louis put his head on Harry’s chest and his arm around his waist, squeezing as close to the younger man, as he could get. Harry cradled Louis’ head in his hand and softly scratched his scalp, holding Louis like he was the most precious thing on earth.

“I think… I always knew I liked girls. That hasn’t changed.” Harry just nodded with his head in Louis hair, letting him continue. “I also feel differently about you though. I don’t know why I suddenly feel this way about a guy, when I never have, but I do. I know I have feelings for you. I really really don’t know what to do about them though. Especially not right now.” Louis explained. “I can’t lose you, Haz.”

“You won’t lose me, I promise, and you absolutely don’t have to do anything right now. We can take our time and whenever you’re ready, I’ll be here. I’m not going anywhere. And even if you decide you never want to be anything other than friends, I’ll always be your friend.”, Harry promised.

Louis took a deep breath and looked up into Harry’s eyes, their noses almost touching. He could feel Harry’s breath on his lips, could feel them tingling but didn’t dare look down. “Thank you, love.” The new nickname seemed fitting, especially since Harry recently kept calling Louis baby. The endearment slipped easily from his lips. Maybe in part because it was true. Louis may not be in love with Harry, not yet at least, but he did love him and he was starting to believe it was the direction this was headed in.

Harry just leaned up to press a soft kiss to Louis forehead and murmured into his skin: “Anytime, baby. What do you need?”

“Time, I think. I need a little more time to come to terms with myself. I know I want this, Haz. I know I want to try this with you. I just need a little more time. I also think I want to talk to my mum first. It feels like such a big thing and I don’t think I could do this without having told her first.”

“That, I can give you.”

Louis snuggled deeper into Harry’s arms and let out a relieved sigh. It felt good to have finally admitted his feelings to Harry. His words had helped a lot in calming Louis and he felt like he could breathe a little easier. Especially knowing that Harry would give him time and be by his side no matter what and knowing his feelings were returned. And in Harry’s arms, feeling calm, content and protected, Louis fell asleep, just like the last time he had needed Harry.

Chapter Text

The next week, keeping his distance from Harry seemed to get harder and harder for Louis. After he finally opened up about his feelings and Harry reacted so understanding, Louis seemed to want nothing more than to be with Harry. They fell asleep cuddling every night and Louis caught himself thinking about kissing Harry more often than not. Privatly, handholding became a thing. Across the table during dinner, cuddled on the couch during movies, their hands seemed to constantly be tangled together.

Louis was scared to say the least. He had talked to Zayn about it, sure and he’s also talked to Harry, but usually what he really needed was just to talk to his mum. And that would make it a whole lot more real.

He knew she’d still love him and that she would always support him, but he couldn’t help but think she might feel like she didn't know him anymore. Hell, he felt like he barely knew himself anymore.

Yet somehow, with Harry he felt more like himself than he ever had before.

He had booked a trip home and was now standing in front of the door of his childhood home. He had talked to his mum about Harry before, pretty much whenever they were on the phone. Partly, because Harry was his roommate and therefore involved in a lot of his days, but mostly because he simply liked talking about Harry.

Harry was his favorite person, his Haz, his love.

This conversation was going to be a different one though. It wasn’t about his day or his good friend. It was about a big part of himself that he himself didn’t know even existed until there was Harry.

He rang the doorbell.

“Boobear! What are you doing here? How are you?”

“Hey mum…”

“Oh sweetheart, what’s wrong?”

Louis chuckled. Maybe she did still know him. Maybe he wasn’t different.

“There’s just something I need to talk to you about.”

“Of course, come in, I’ll make us a cuppa!”

Louis went to the sofa and nervously rung is fingers, until his mum returned with two steaming mugs of tea a few minutes later and sat down next to him. Louis immediately leaned on her, so she could put her arm around him. She knew not to talk and just give Louis his time to open up.

“I’m scared mum...”

“Are you scared to tell me or…?”

“No, I am scared of feeling this way.”, Louis got out, while he could feel the tears starting to well up in his eyes.
“Oh… so this is about Harry then…?”, she asked carefully. So, she suspected. Louis should have guessed. She was his mum after all.

“Yes. I just. He makes me feel so safe. Like I can be my true self and he’s still gonna care about me. But also...", he hesitated. "Mum, I think I’m falling in love with him.” Louis sobbed.

“It’s okay darling.” She started rocking him gently. “I know this is all new and likely terrifying for you, but Harry seems very lovely and as long as he is good to you, there is nothing you need to be worried about. You are still you. Only I have never seen you happier than you’ve been since Harry came into your life and that is all I could wish for. I love you so much and I just want you to be happy.”

Louis smiled. “I guess he is pretty amazing.”

“Have you talked to him about it?”

“Yeah, I have. We have kind of been dancing around each other. We both knew there was more, but he also knew I have only ever been interested in girls, so he didn’t pressure me. A few days ago, we started holding hands and just kept looking at each other. I panicked and he just held me and asked what was wrong, so I told him how confused I was and he… understood. Said he knows it’s scary and he would be there when I was ready. That he would do everything at my pace and even if I never wanted more, he’d always be there for me. Since then, I just wanted… I just wanted to be with him, I guess, but I really wanted to tell you first.”

“Oh boobear. I am so glad he was there for you. You really couldn’t have found anyone better. I really hope I get to meet him soon.”

The rest of the day went by in a blur. They just cuddled on the couch and spend the afternoon with the girls, but Louis just wanted to get back to Harry.

Talking to his mum was freeing to him and he felt like he was finally ready to let Harry in, so at around 11pm he finally got back to their flat and sneaked into Harry’s room, to find him already sitting up in bed, hair in a disheveled bun.

“You’re awake.” “I couldn’t sleep. Heard you come in. How was your mum’s?”

Louis started stripping out of his trousers and climbed into bet in pants and a t shirt. Harry laid down next to him and Louis greedily cuddled into his open arms.

“It was really good. She told me I was still myself, that she loved me and she was just glad you make me happy.”

Harry placed a kiss into Louis’ hair and murmured: “I make you happy?” Louis leaned back a little to look into Harry’s eyes. “You do.”

For a moment time had no meaning. Harry just smiled at Louis, dimple on full display, and gently caressed his chin, while they just gazed into each other’s eyes.

Louis reached his hand up to gently touch his thumb to Harry’s dimple, his hand carefully enveloping Harry’s jaw. Harry just let him explore. Louis carefully carded his fingers into Harry’s hair, softly massaging his scalp.

He then started slowly tracing the lines of Harry’s face. His cheekbone, his eyebrow, his nose until slowly his gaze drifted downwards and he gently traced Harry’s lower lip. It looked so soft, so inviting. He couldn’t help but think about how it would feel to finally have them on his own. He could feel Harry’s shaky breath on his finger and started leaning closer. He looked back up into Harry’s eyes to find hope and desire reflected at him.

Slowly he leaned their foreheads together and moved his hand to Harry’s neck. He was so close. He could already feel Harry’s breath ghosting over his lips. Finally, he closed his eyes and pressed the softest of kisses to Harry’s waiting lips. It felt like coming home. He felt safe, protected and happy, while simultaneously his entire body felt like it was on fire. Harry started gently moving his lips against Louis’ but kept the kiss as soft as it had started.

Louis couldn’t get enough. Now that he finally let Harry in, it was like a wall inside him had come down and he just needed Harry closer, so he softly touched his tongue against Harry’s lower lip, silently asking for entrance.

Harry opened his mouth and touched his tongue to Louis’. It felt better than anything Louis had ever felt before. Slowly they were teasing their tongues against each other.

When Harry lightly suckled on Louis lower lip and carefully nipped at it, Louis couldn’t help but moan. He shifted closer to Harry, just wanting to feel his body against his own and moved his hand down his side to then slide it under Harry’s shirt and touch the soft skin on his lower back.

He pulled Harry closer and pressed his thigh between Harry’s. It felt mind blowing to be this close, to feel Harry skin on skin while their kisses turned deeper and more passionate. The entire moment felt heated, so Louis slowly started lifting Harry’s shirt.

They reluctantly parted their lips, to be able to pull the shirt over Harry’s head and Louis was finally able to explore his entire back with his fingers. He could feel Harry’s back muscles flex beneath his hands when he kissed him more heatedly and could feel Harry move his own hand beneath Louis shirt at his back.

He couldn’t stop thinking about what it would feel like to be chest to chest, skin to skin with Harry, when he already felt like he was burning from the simple touch of his hand. He needed to find out, so he slowly lifted his arms above his head to show Harry he could take off Louis’ shirt. It was the greatest relieve to feel Harry breathe against himself, to feel his heartbeat just as erratic and fast as Louis’ own but still completely in sync with each other.

Louis moaned at the touch and their kisses started to become more desperate, open mouths pressing against each other, trying to get as close as possible. Louis was becoming more and more confident and slid his hand down, carefully cupping Harry’s bum. Harry’s breath hitched and all Louis wanted was to see what sounds he could pull out of Harry, so he started kneading the flesh. Harry’s hips stuttered aligning their groins, suddenly giving both of them a little friction, making them both groan. Harry stilled completely and pulled his face slightly away to look at Louis.

“I’m sorry, is this too much?”, Harry asked. Concern was written all over his face as he carefully tried to gauge Louis reaction. Louis didn’t want to stop. “No, I need you please, don’t stop!” Harry kept looking all over Louis’ face and seemed to find what he was looking for, because he suddenly launched forward and pressed their bodies together, flipping Louis onto his back.

“This okay?” he murmured into their kiss, putting one of his thighs between Louis and pressing down on him. “Yes, please, more than okay.” Louis said breathily, carding one of his hands into Harry’s long curls, making his bun fall apart and pulling Harry down with the other against his lower back.

Harry starts softly shifting his hips, rubbing himself against Louis, only the fabric of their pants separating them. “Fhuuck” Louis gasped. He looked beautiful. Head thrown back against the mattress, eyes shut tight and mouth open, breathing heavily into Harry’s mouth.

They kept moving against each other, hands roaming over heated skin, breaths mixing during heated kisses. Louis had never felt closer to Harry. They fit together like they were made to be moving together. Louis pulled out Harry’s elastic to tangle his fingers in Harry’s hair. He gave them a small tug, eliciting Harry to moan loudly into the kiss.

“Lou, baby, you feel so good! Fuck, so hot like this.” Harry said.

Louis spread his legs further so that Harry could slide between his legs. This way, they were completely aligned and Harry could grind against Louis properly.
“Oh God, Harry, keep doing that, please.” Louis moaned. “Of course baby, fuck, everything for you. You feeling good?”

“Yes, Harry, ahh, so good, please, so good, ungh.” Louis arched his back to try and get even closer to Harry, pressing their chests together, his hand tightening in Harry’s hair, while his other hand gripped Harry’s lower back to push him down even harder, his fingernails scratching his skin.

The pressure made Louis throw his head back in a silent moan, Harry moving his kisses down Louis’ neck to suck on the sensitive spot below his ear.

“Harry…”, Louis almost whispered, “please, I need…” He couldn’t even finish the sentence but Harry knew it meant that Louis was close and started thrusting harder against him, moving his hand down Louis’ side to press into his hip to hold him down while lifting his head to lean their foreheads together, breathing the same air.

Harry leaned into a kiss and just before pushing his tongue into Louis mouth he whispered: “Come for me, baby.”

“Harry!”, Louis moaned into the kiss, his entire body tensing while he came into his pants. He could feel Harry tensing as well, coming only seconds after him, his hands fisting the sheet next to his head, while their grinds slowed to a halt.

“Lou, baby, are you okay?” Harry said, a slightly worried tinge to his voice.

“I’m amazing, love.”, Louis said honestly. He pressed a soft kiss to Harry’s lips and caressed his cheek softly. “This was amazing, you are amazing.”

“I’m glad. I think it was amazing, too.” Harry moved from on top of Louis to lay on his back and pulled Louis' head to rest on his chest, one hand cradled in his hair, he other stroking soft patterns on his back.

They looked into each other’s eyes, smiling a soft, happy smile. “I’m so proud of you, Lou.”

“Thanks, love. We should really clean up though, because as amazing as this was, I feel gross.” They both started laughing and took turns going to the bathroom to get rid of their dirty pants and came back to bed in a fresh pair, still shirtless. They laid down on their sides, Louis pulling Harry against his chest and burrowing his face in Harry’s long curls. “Goodnight, Haz.” “Goodnight, Lou.” Harry turned his head to press a soft kiss to Louis lips and then settled down, Louis pressing another kiss against the back of his neck and taking a deep breath of Harry’s smell.

Chapter Text

The next morning, Louis woke up with a smile. He tightened his arms around the giant boy cuddled to his chest and pressed a small kiss to Harry’s neck. “Morning baby.” Harry said. “Morning love, how long have you been up? You could have woken me.” “Not long and I liked just having you cuddle me.”, Harry replied and started turning in Louis arms. Louis loosened his grip so they could lay face to face to each other, noses touching. “Hey. You’re still okay today?” Harry wondered. “I’m still amazing today, love. I feel so relieved. I can’t believe I’ve waited this long to finally kiss you. Speaking of…”, Louis trailed of and placed a kiss to Harry’s lips that turned into more teeth clashing, because both couldn’t stop themselves from smiling into the kiss.

“I’m so glad you’re happy about this. About us.”

“Me too, love. Me too. I can’t promise, I’ll be ready to immediately tell everyone though.”, Louis murmured.

“Of course baby. Whenever you’re ready. I told you, everything is happening only as fast as you want for it to happen. I won’t rush you. I’ll just be your secret mistress for a while.” Harry smiled.

“Well…” Louis hesitated.

“What is it, baby? You can tell me.” Harry insisted, softly caressing Louis’s cheekbone.

“I don’t want you to be my secret mistress. Secret, yes for now, but… I’d actually rather you be my secret boyfriend.” Louis replied hopefully, biting his lower lip in anticipation. It felt weird saying the word, but Louis knew he wanted to be sure Harry was his and only his.

A smile slowly started to spread across Harry’s face, turning into a full on grin, both diples on display for Louis to sink his thumbs into.

“Even better. I’d love to be your boyfriend, Lou.” Harry surged forward pressing his lips against Louis' in a heated kiss. He deepened it immediately, morning breath be damned, and Louis moaned into the kiss.

“Fuck, I didn’t know the word boyfriend turned you on so much, Haz!”

“You turn me on. Being yours turns me on. Fuck, Lou baby, you don’t even know how amazing you are. So kind, funny, caring, gorgeous. God, you looked so hot coming for me yesterday. Wanna see you come again.” Harry pulled Louis on top of himself so that he straddled Harry’s hips, while Harry’s hands found their way to Louis lower back, pulling him against himself.

“God Harry, that mouth of yours.” Louis said before leaning into a heated kiss. He ground down against Harry, a strangled moan escaping his lips and mixing with a Harry’s high pitched whine.

Unfortunately, that was when their doorbell rang. “Ungh not now!” Harry groaned while Louis stood up and quickly grabbed a shirt and some joggers to go open their door. They didn’t expect anyone, so Louis expected it to be one of Zayn’s surprise visits. When he opened the door that was exactly who he found looking at him.

“Hey Zayn, what’s up?” “Sorry to barge in like this, Lou, but I just wanted to see how you were doing. After you and Harry left the pub so suddenly last week I’ve just been worried. Can we talk?”

“Yeah, sure, come in. You want some tea?” “ Sounds good, yeah. So, how have you been Lou?”

Louis looked at Zayn for a moment and thought about what he was going to say. Zayn already knew about his feelings for Harry, so really, there was nothing for Louis to really hide, still he still felt weird talking about it. “Everything okay Lou? Oh hey Zayn!” Harry emerged from his bedroom.

“Hey Harry, sorry to disturb you this morning, I just came to talk to Lou for a bit. I can come back another time.” Zayn gave a meaningful look to Louis, communicating without words that now that Harry was here, he would of course let their conversation rest for now. “No, Zayn it’s fine, Harry already knows what I’m going to tell you anyways.” “He knows?” Zayn asked, obviously alluding to Louis' feelings for Harry. Harry just looked confusedly between the two, while Louis started fiddling nervously. “Yes he knows. Actually, well… I’m sorry it’s still very hard for me to really say it out loud.”

Harry seemed to realize what Louis was about to tell Zayn and stepped closer to him, eyes always on Louis face to make sure he was okay with this. He didn’t reach out to Louis, simply giving him the time he needed, but also giving him courage with that little hesitant smile. Louis looked up into Harry’s eyes and saw only encouragement and pride reflected at him. He looked back to Zayn who was watching the two of them intrigued. “Harry is my boyfriend as of this morning.”

“Really? Lou, I’m so proud of you! How did that happen?” Zayn surged forward to pull Louis into a big bear hug. “Well, last week after pub night, Harry and I had a little conversation.” Zayn finally let go of Louis to look at him proudly. “I told Harry how I felt about him, but that I needed more time to figure some stuff out. Then yesterday, I decided to tell mum and I guess that was just what I needed. So yeah. Harry’s my boyfriend now.”

Harry smiled at him and reached out to link their fingers together.

“God, you two are disgustingly cute together. I can’t believe it took you that long.”

“Yeah, now that I have him, I can’t believe it took me that long either.” Louis replied. “Hey, you weren’t ready so it was right for you to take your time. I would have waited. You did nothing wrong.”, Harry argued quickly, tilting Louis head up, so that he’d meet his eyes. “I didn’t mean it that way, love. I know it was right to wait and I am so glad you were okay with that. I just meant that it’s really nice to have you and it would be nice to have you for even longer.”, Louis tried to reason. “We can do that in the future baby. No need to regret the past.” “I know.”

“Wow, guys, I’m still here you know?”, Zayn interrupted. Louis and Harry both turned their heads at the sudden exclamation and started laughing, because they had indeed kind of forgotten that Zayn was even there.

“Well, I’ll leave you guys to it then.” Zayn said, raising his hands as in defense and started walking backwards towards the door. “I’m glad you’re okay, though, Lou. I’m proud of you.” “Thanks, Zaynie. Hey, please do me a favor. Don’t tell the others yet. I don’t think I am quite ready for that, yet.” Louis worried and gave Zayn a pleading look. “Of course, whatever you want. Your secret’s safe with me.”

“Thanks. Bye Zayn!” “Bye you two!” And with that, Zayn was out the door as quickly as he came.
“Hey, baby.” Harry said, reaching out to Louis and waiting for him to grab his hand. He then pulled Louis in between his thighs, where Harry was leaning against their kitchen table and held onto Louis’ waist. Louis wrapped his arms around Harry’s neck, waiting for him to continue.

“I’m really proud of you, too, baby, but you didn’t need to tell anybody so soon. Did Zayn already know something? It sounded like it…” Harry asked, giving Louis a concerned look.

“I know I didn’t need to tell him, I did want to though. And yes, when I started feeling really confused about you, because our friendship started feeling like more than just that, Zayn immediately knew that something was wrong.” Harry started softly caressing Louis’ sides in encouragement.

“He asked me pretty straight out if I had feelings for you and I didn’t really deny it. I never truly told him anything, but he made it clear I didn’t need to. And at the time that was good. I wasn’t ready to actively say something, but I needed someone to know about it. Sorry, this probably doesn’t even make any sense.” Louis shook his head self deprecatingly.

“No, baby, it does. It absolutely makes sense. You needed to feel like someone understood you, but you weren’t quite ready to accept yourself, so you couldn’t talk about it. I get it.”
“I don’t think you understand how grateful I am to have you, Haz.” Louis softly pushed a stray curl behind Harry’s ear and stroked his cheekbone with his thumb.

Harry pulled Louis even closer against himself and touched their foreheads together. “I do though.”, he spoke softly. “Because I am just as grateful to have you.” He leaned forward to press a soft kiss to Louis lips. Louis could practically feel all the care Harry had for him. It made him feel warm all over and for the first time he knew, he loved Harry. He wasn’t quite in love with him, yet, but he knew he would be soon enough, but until then, he already loved him.

“I’m starving. Let’s make breakfast.” Louis told Harry instead.

“And by us you mean me, because you want pancakes and you would burn them, am I right?”

Harry loved him, too.

Louis simply smiled at him and pressed another peck to Harry’s lips.

“Of course, love. What else would I mean?”

Chapter Text

Louis couldn‘t seem to stop thinking about what happened between him and Harry the night before. He knew Harry was beautiful and that he had feelings for the boy, but until last night, he hadn’t really thought about the fact, that he also found Harry very sexually attractive. And what that would mean for them. He obviously never had sex with a guy before. Now that he knew what it felt like to be with Harry though, he knew he wanted to.

He just didn’t quite know.. how.

Well, he knew how. He wasn’t entirely oblivious to how that worked, he just didn’t know what he specifically wanted.

He knew what it was like to be the one in control, to be the one dominating. The way Harry had felt lying on top of him though... it had left Louis thinking.

Thinking about what it would be like to give himself to Harry.

While everywhere else, Louis was constantly in control, with Harry it seamed to come naturally to Louis to let go. Louis wasn’t sure if that would be their dynamic in bed as well, and if it was, whether he was truly ready for that.
The two of them were on the couch, watching a romantic comedy – Harry’s favourite genre – while Louis used Harry’s thighs as a pillow and Harry was carding his fingers through Louis’ hair.

Louis hadn’t been paying attention to the movie though...

“Haz..?”, he asked hesitantly.

Harry immediately looked down, a small wrinkle of concern visible between his eyebrows.

“Can I ask you something?”
“Always.”, Harry replied without hesitation.

“I’ve been thinking...”, Louis started nervously. “About what it would be like...” He started wringing his fingers, when Harry’s hand found his and he started caressing it lovingly.

“What is it baby?”, Harry spoke softly.

Louis took a deep breath.

“What it would be like... to have sex with you.” Louis looked up into Harry’s eyes, who seemed surprised by the question and swallowed heavily. He started squirming a little.

Louis sat up abrubtly. “Should I not have said that?”, he worried immediately.
“No, no, baby, it’s not that, I promise!”, Harry tried to reassure Louis.
“Then what is it, love?”

“Lou, you just told me you were thinking about having sex with me, when yesterday I still thought that was a distant hope, if even that, while your head was lying on my thighs...”, Harry explained.

“Oh...”, Louis realized, a small smirk reaching his lips.
“Yeah, oh.”, Harry smiled.

“It’s nice to know I have that effect on you.”, Louis replied cheekily. It made Harry laugh. Louis loved making Harry laugh.

“Anyway, I just, I want to... stuff... with you, I just don’t really know how?” It came out as more of a question than he meant it to. “Well, I do know how.”, Louis corrected. “Just... what does it feel like? To be...”, Louis stuttered.

“Lou, are you asking me what it feels like to be a bottom?”, Harry inquired carefully.
“I guess.” Louis looked down at where he was nervously fiddeling with his fingers again.

“No need to be shy about that, baby.”, Harry reassured while reaching for Louis hands. He started caressing his thumbs over Louis knuckles.

“Well, at first it feels very weird. It can hurt a bit, but it also makes you feel very close to the other person. You might need to get used to the feeling, but once you do, you can feel the other person everywhere. They are inside you and it feels like they are all around you as well. You need to trust them, to be able to relax and let go. If you do that, it feels really amazing.”, Harry explained, his cheeks tinged slightly pink

and his breathing started to get faster. Louis imagined it. Imagined what it would feel like to be this close to Harry.

He knew he would like it. He did trust Harry. He seemed to be the only person in whose presence Louis could truly lose and find himself at the same time. But Louis also knew he wasn’t quite ready for that step yet.

Seeing Harry like this though... So turned on simply be the thought of sleeping with Louis, it did something to him.
“Harry, love.” Louis moved his hand to Harry’s thigh and started drawing little circles with his fingernails. They were both only in boxershorts, which meant Louis was touching Harry’s skin.

Harry couldn’t keep his eyes off Louis, their gazes locked on each other.
“I am not quite ready for... that... yet.”
Harry nodded, still breathing heavily.
“But I do want to try things with you.” Harry inhaled sharply at those words.

“Lou, are you sure?”, he wanted to know, always making sure Louis was alright. Louis just nodded, his gaze sinking to Harry’s lips.

“What do you want?”, Harry asked softly.
“I want to move this to bed. I want to touch you everywhere. I want you to touch me everywhere. And...”, Louis hesitated.

“And what, baby?”, Harry could only whisper, his breathing becoming even heavier.
“And I want you to...” Harry smiled, signalling Louis could ask for anything and Harry would be okay with it.

“I want you to kiss me... everywhere.”

“Fuck.” Harry surged forward, capturing Louis' lips in a passionate kiss, while his hands moved to grab Louis' thighs. Harry lifted Louis off the couch effortlessly, carrying him toward his bedroom. “I want that, too. All of that.” Harry murmured between kisses. Louis smiled. He could feel himself growing harder with every touch of their tongues. He could also feel that Harry was hard where they where pressed together.

Harry set Louis down carefully on the bed, like he was the most precious thing Harry ever held. They kept kissing passionately while moving up the bed together.

Louis hands found their way underneath Harry’s shirt, pulling it upwards.

“Off.”, he murmured into their kiss. Harry pulled the shirt over his head before taking Louis’ off es well. He moved his kissed down to the side of Louis neckand started sucking slightly on the sensitive skin.

A moan escaped Louis’ lips, which only seemed to spur Harry on further. Louis felt like he was in heaven. It all came so naturally with Harry. Harry who had moved further down and was now softly biting Louis’ right nipple.

“Oh God.”, Louis exhaled. His hands finding their way into Harry’s hair.
Harry’s kisses were traveling down Louis’ body, while his hands gripped Louis' boxer shorts. “Okay?”, Harry asked.
Louis could only nod, suddenly feeling more nervous than before. They had never seen each other naked.

Harry slowly pulled Louis’ shorts down, kepeping his eyes on his boyfriends face to make sure he was still okay with this.
“You’re so beautiful.”, Harry said, seeming to sense Louis sudden nervousness. Their tempo had slowed down and Harry crawled back up the bed to press a soft kiss to Louis lips. “Are you alright, baby?”, Harry was concerned. Louis swallowed visibly.

“Yeah, just... a bit self conscious suddenly.”, he admitted looking up into the moss green of Harry’s eyes, his hands caressing Harry’s jaw.
“I understand that. There is no need to be though. You are so absolutely gorgeous baby.” Harry reassured him. “Do you still want this?”
“I promise I do, love.”, Louis smiled cheekily. “Now if you’d be so kind as to continue?”
That made Harry laugh. “Now there’s the Louis I know. As you wish baby.”

Harry leaned down to give Louis another passionate kiss, their tongues playing with each other while both couldn’t help but smile into it. Harry chose that moment to let his right hand travel down Louis body starting on his chest. Harry’s fingertips were ever so slightly touching Louis skin, making goosebumps travel over his entire body. A soft sigh escaped Louis’ lips as he felt Harry’s fingers move further down. He could feel every touch so strongly, like the only thing that mattered in this world were Harry’s lips on his and his hands on Louis’ body.

Harry flattened his hand on Louis stomach, pressing down slightly before moving it to Louis’ hipbone and squeezing his side.

“God, Harry.”, Louis moaned into their kiss.
“Your hands feel so good, love.”, he exhaled softly. Louis' breathing had become heavier, soft sighs escaping him with every breath. Louis hand tightened in Harry’s hair, eliciting a moan from the younger man.

“Lou, baby. Fuck, I want to make you feel so good.” Harry moved his hand even lower, finally wrapping it around Louis’ length and pumping it slowly.

“Ohh, fuck, Haz. Already feels so good. Please...” Louis didn’t even know what he was asking for, Harry seemed to understand him anyways. He broke their kiss and started sucking on the skin of Louis neck again, making his way down Louis body, sometimes biting the skin. It sent a pleasurable pain through Louis’ body and he could do nothing but fist Harry’s hair and moan whenever Harry found an especially sensitive spot. Louis could watch the muscles in Harry's back move and it looked incredibly hot.

Louis felt amazing. This part, he knew, yet it felt so entirely different. It wasn’t because Harry was a guy though. Rather, that it was Harry in particular. Harry who seemed to care for Louis in way nobody ever did before. Harry, his gorgeous boy who would constantly make sure Louis was okay with everything going on, who protected Louis, when Louis had always been the one protecting others. Harry, who chose this exact moment to wrap his lips around Louis dick, sucking him down until his nose was touching Louis stomach, while his hands were holding his hips down.

Louis threw his head back in extasy, a silent moan stuck in his throat.
His hands tried holding on to anything they could reach, currently fisting strands of Harry’s hair. That made Harry moan around Louis’ cock. Louis could feel the vibrations around him.

“Haz... ahh... fuck that feels good. Oh God, please don’t stop.”
Harry kept sucking Louis, moving his mouth up and down, sometimes teasing the tip of Louis dick with his tongue. Louis was getting closer to the edge by the second. As if sensing it, Harry released Louis’ dick from his mouth, kissing up his body until he reached Louis’ lips.

“Why’d you stop?”, Louis asked breathlessly.
“Would you turn around for me baby?”, Harry asked. He was looking at Louis as if he was worried to scare him. Louis didn’t quite understand though...

“Why would I turn around?” Louis was confused.
“Well, you asked me to kiss you everywhere, didn’t you?”, Harry smirked, realizing Louis had no idea what he meant until this moment.

“Wait... you mean...?” Louis couldn’t quite finish the thought.
“If you want me to, yeah.”, Harry offered. They simply looked at each other for a moment longer. Louis was considering it. Slowly, he nodded, before twisting benath Harry to then lay on his stomach. The ruff fabric of the sheets felt weird touching his dick, since it was still sentitive from being sucked by Harry for the past minutes.
Louis' nerves started returning, but he tried his best to relax.

He knew Harry would always stop the second Louis asked him to. Louis could still feel him all over his back, when Harry whispered in his ear.
“Shhh, baby. I promise, it’s gonna feel so good. Relax, please. Just say the word and we’ll stop this, alright?”
Louis could only nod into the pillow, where he buried his face.

Harry then started leaving kisses down Louis’ spine until he reached his butt, pressing kisses to both cheeks before spreading them. Louis took a shaking breath. He could feel Harry blowing hot air against his rim and that already felt like his body was on fire. It had nothing against when Harry started kissing it though. How did Louis never know how sensitive he was there? He groaned into the pillow. Harry was licking and sucking him carefully. It sent shivers through Louis’ body and jolts through his dick. Louis couldn’t decide anymore, whether he should push against the sheets to get some friction on his neglected dick, or push against Harry’s warm mouth.

He ended up doing a little of both, shifting on the matress.
Louis hands had a cramping grip on the pillow and he arched his back, trying to push further into Harry’s touch.
“Harry... oh fuck... ah God that feels... I can’t... ohh...Haz... please.”

Louis was so close to coming, he couldn’t seem to stop rubbing against both the matress and Harry’s mouth.
It was Harry humming against his rim, sending vibrations through him that went straight to his cock the exact same moment his tongue breached Louis’ hole and he could feel Harry’s tongue inside him, that had Louis tensing, his mouth open in silent scream and coming against the mattress harder than ever before.

“Harry...” it was almost just a breathless whisper. Louis was completely spent.
Harry moved up the bed to press a kiss to Louis’ shoulder blade.
“You okay baby?”, he asked softly. Louis could only nod, his face still sunken in the pillow.
“I’ll be right back, I’ll just get us something to clean up.” That had Louis turn his head.

“Us?”, Louis asked confusedly.
“Well... I might have gotten off on those beautiful sounds you were making, baby.”, Harry smiled shily.

“Oh...”, Louis smirked. Harry pressed a sweet kiss to Louis’ cheek, before he went to the batroom to grab them a wet towel. He cleaned himself up, before coming back and handing another one to Louis. He had turned around and was now sitting up in bed.

“We should probably move to your bedroom tonight, Lou, I am absolutely not in the mood to change the sheets.”, Harry laughed.
“Sounds good to me.”, Louis replied, a soft smile on his lips. So that is what they did.

Cuddled together in Louis’ bed, lying face to face, they couldn’t seem to stop smiling at each other. Louis was softly stroking Harry’s cheekbone, when he broke the comfortable silence.

“Haz?”, he asked, suddelnly quite serious.

“Thank you. For everything.”

He knew Harry understood.

Chapter Text

Louis was fine in the little protected world he and Harry had built at home. He was comfortable. He wasn’t comfortable with leaving it though.
He and Harry were supposed to see the guys for lunch. They hadn’t properly seen each other since pub night and that was over a week ago.

Louis was panicking to say the least. He kept pacing their kitchen, wondering how he was supposed to not touch Harry the way they had been for the past week. He was thinking about whether everyone would take one look at him and see that he was different.

He was wondering, if he WAS different. Did he change? It felt like he had… He couldn’t quite figure out what exactly he had changed into though.

He knew, he didn’t want to hide Harry. He deserved more than that. How was he going to tell Liam and Niall though? And what would he tell them?

Louis knew he wasn’t gay. That much was clear after the past years he spent happily sleeping with women. He knew now, that it wasn’t limited to girls though. Not with the way he felt about Harry.
Was he bi?
Maybe… if he was, why did everything feel so different with Harry though?
Harry seemed to make everything better. Well, maybe Louis was just harrysexual.

“Hey baby, what’s wrong?”, Harry asked, clearly worried about Louis pacing their kitchen.
“Is it the guys?”

“I don’t know how to tell them, Haz. I really don’t.”, Louis replied honestly.
“You don’t have to tell them anything, Lou. You don’t owe them an explanation. I promised to this at your pace. If you want this to be secret for a while, I can just act like your friend today.”, Harry reassured Louis.

“I don’t want to keep you secret though. I like being with you. You make me so happy and I don’t want to waste time pretending you don’t. It’s just… What if they ask questions I can’t answer?” Harry took a step forward and placed his hands to softly cradle Louis’ face.

“What do you mean?” Harry leaned his forehead against Louis’.
“What if they ask if I’m gay or something? I don’t even know if I am. The only thing I know is that I want to be with you.” Louis grabbed the sides of Harry’s shirt, desperately clinging to his comfort.

“Then that is exactly what you tell them, baby. You don’t need to have everything figured out right now. They are your friends. They’ll understand.”, Harry reassured.
He always seemed to find the right words.

“I hadn’t looked at it like that. I thought I needed answers, before I would tell them. But I don’t have answers.”
“I know baby and that is absolutely fine. You can find those answers in your own time. You just tell them about what you want to tell them. Nothing more and nothing less.”

“Thanks Haz. I don’t know what I would do if I didn’t have you.”, Louis sighed. He was visibly relieved.
“You’d probably ruin the perfectly well kitchen floor with your pacing.”; Harry joked.
That finally pulled a laugh out of Louis.

“God Lou, your laugh is the most beautiful thing in the entire world. I always want to hear you laugh.”
“Not possible, it’s yours.” Louis smiled. His cheeks were tinged in a soft pink. He couldn’t help but surge forward to kiss Harry. Not when he said beautiful things about Louis’ laugh and his lips were right there.

They left for lunch about 10 minutes later.

The lads were already deep in conversation when Louis and Harry arrived at the small café.
The three of them were sitting in at a table outside, drinks already in hand. Harry and Louis sat down next to Liam and opposite of Zayn and Niall.

“Finally, what took you lads so long?” Niall exclaimed immediately upon their arrival.
“We’re five minutes late man, chill.” Louis replied.

He loved spending time with all of them, but for the entire time of their lunch, Louis couldn’t help but be in his head. He knew, Zayn noticed, because he purposefully didn’t bug Louis with any questions. Harry of course, knew as well. He had placed a comforting hand on Louis knee, out of sight from the others.

Louis barely listened to their conversation though. It was Niall’s voice saying Louis’ name that suddenly interrupted his thoughts.

“What?”, Louis asked.

“Mate, do even listen to me? I said I know this girl, her name’s Danielle and she’s absolutely your type. She’s newly single and looking for some fun. Honestly man, when’s the last time you got laid? I could give you her number.”

Louis could feel Harry’s hand tense on his leg and saw his smile shrinking from the corner of his eye. Zayn gave Louis a concerned look from across the table.

Louis swallowed. So this was it then. He knew Niall meant well. He couldn’t know Louis wasn’t looking for a girl to sleep with. Casual hookups had been his thing throughout uni.

“Thanks Niall, but I don’t want her number.” Louis got out tensely.

“Honestly mate, you’ve been weirdly silent the entire time and now you’re saying no to casual sex. What’s going on with you?” Niall was confused.
Liam looked at Louis searchingly. He seemed to sense there was something bigger going on.

“Lou? You can talk to us, you know?” Liam interrupted Niall’s rambling calmly.
Louis nodded, his eyes trained on where he was wringing his hands nervously on the table.

“Louis? Sorry, if I said something wrong man. Honestly, is everything alright?” Even Niall realized this was more serious than he had thought.

Louis looked up to Zayn, who gave him an encouraging nod, but stayed silent. Harry’s fingers started softly caressing Louis’ knee.

“I’m fine, guys. There is something I wanted to tell you though.” Louis began carefully.
“Whatever it is, you can tell us.” Liam tried to comfort him.
“I know thank you. This is all still very new, so I’m not sure how to say it, but I’d be really grateful, if you could just listen for a moment.” Everyone nodded in agreement, but stayed silent so they wouldn’t interrupt Louis.

“I’ve recently realized some things about myself. I wanted to wait to tell you guys until I had it all figured out, but honestly, I don’t think it’s that easy. I know I’m rambling, sorry. I guess the point is, I am dating Harry.” A collective breath of shock was taken by both Liam and Niall, confusion was clouding their eyes.

“It is the first time I have felt that way about a guy and I honestly don’t know why this is suddenly happening. As I said, it’s very new. I didn’t want to hide this from you guys though. So yeah. Harry’s my boyfriend.”

The words just hung in the air for a while. Both Zayn and Harry were giving Louis proud smiles. Niall and Liam seemed quite shocked, but sure enough, smiles started appearing on both their faces.

Liam was the first to speak up.

“I can’t believe I didn’t see this coming. It’s so obvious in hindsight, how happy you’ve always made each other. I am so happy for you guys! And Louis, I am so proud if you for telling us.” Liam reached across the table to squeeze Louis’ hands. “I love you, mate.”

Louis squeezed Liam’s hand back gratefully and smiled at him, letting out a breath of relief.
His eyes moved over to Niall, who was positively beaming at him.

“Oh. My. God. I can’t believe you’re actually dating. I am so happy right now. I totally called that!” Suddenly, the smile left Niall’s face. “Wait… Lou, is that why you left during pub night? I am so, so sorry if I made you uncomfortable.” Niall seemed to really hate himself for making that comment, so Louis reached across the table to hold on to Niall’s forearm.
“It’s okay Nialler. You were right after all. Just, at that point I hadn’t really admitted to myself what was happening between me and Haz.”

“I’m still sorry, Lou. And I am really happy figured it out. Love you, mate.” The two of them smiled at each other. Suddenly, they collectively seemed to realize that Zayn hadn’t commented the scene at all and their eyes snapped over to him immediately.

“You knew!?” They exclaimed at the same time. Louis and Harry just started laughing, while Zayn had a proud smile on his face.

“Of course I knew! Who do you think kicked Louis’ stubborn ass when he didn’t want to see what I saw?”
“And you didn’t tell us!?” Niall appeared truly appalled by the thought. “I wanted them to start dating since Louis introduced us to Harry. They were literally attached to each other since day one!” He was almost yelling.

Zayn, serious as always, simply replied: “It wasn’t my story to tell you.” He sent a small smile in Louis’ direction. “I am very proud of him though.”

Louis truly had the best friends he could wish for.

Harry wrapped his arm around Louis’ waist and wispered in his ear: “I am so proud of you baby.” He then pressed a kiss to Louis’ temple.

“Aren’t you guys just the cutest!” Niall practically squealed.
Louis laughed and turned his head to Harry. “I couldn’t have done it without you, love.” In his gratefulness, Louis forget they weren’t alone for a moment and leaned forward to press a soft kiss to Harry’s lips.

“Alright guys, I would like to remeind you, AGAIN, that you are not alone.”

Right. Louis truly wasn’t alone. He had the best friends in the world and the most supportive boyfriend he could have wished for.

Chapter Text

Louis was happy and proud that he told the guys. It was interesting to him, how Louis had always been the person people lean on. His sisters were all younger and even with his friends Louis was the one people came to when they needed advice.

Being with Harry made Louis feel vulnerable. It wasn’t just in the way Harry had been through this before, hence he could explain things to him. That was part of it, of course, but there was more to it.

Louis still had the urge to take care of Harry most of the time and no matter their height difference, Harry would always be the little spoon. It was in the way Harry wanted to take care of Louis as well. In the way, Harry cooked every night, because he knew, Louis hated it. How Harry didn’t just ask, how Louis was feeling, but why he was feeling that way. How Harry knew the names of all of Louis’ sisters since day two of living together.

In the way, Harry took care of Louis in bed.

While they had established that Harry was versatile and loved being teased by Louis and feeling small sometimes, it was also obvious that Harry relished in taking care of Louis. He was always making sure Louis was comfortable and had come from just watching Louis before.
This past week, the two of them had ended up coming together at least once a day.

Louis just couldn’t stop touching Harry. This past night for example, they ended up showering together and Louis kept staring at how the droplets of water ran down Harry’s abs and soon his fingers had followed the path. He pressed Harry against the shower wall with his own body, while his hand was stroking Harry’s dick. It didn’t feel much different than touching himself, but knowing he was touching Harry and watching him, head thrown back and mouth open, was really turning Louis on. He had started kissing down Harry’s neck and sucking and biting the skin, while his hand had kept on getting Harry off.

When Harry came, he grabbed onto Louis shoulders in order not to fall and it was the pain of Harry’s fingernails digging into Louis’ skin and the thought that Louis had made him lose control like that, that had Louis coming against Harry’s thigh, where Louis had been finding pressure.

This morning though… Harry had a different idea.
They were lying on their sides, only in boxer shorts, Harry’s hands seemingly everywhere while they were kissing passionately.

“Haz, love…” Louis was interrupted by another kiss.
“I’m not complaining, but what has gotten into you?” Harry pressed his thigh against Louis’ groin. “Ohh… mhh Haz.”

“You made me come so hard yesterday.” Harry sucked on Louis’ neck and was rewarded with a moan and Louis fisting his hair. “Wanna take care of you today. Can I?”

“Of course love, anything you want. Fuck, you feel so good already.”

“Lou, I want to show you something.” Louis had a vague idea what Harry might be talking about and if it involved having Harry inside him, Louis was definitely curious.
“What is it, love?”, he asked. Harry lifted his head to look Louis in the eyes, so close their noses were almost touching.

“I think it would be a little fast to move to full on sex already, but I would love to show you what it feels like, to have my fingers inside you.” Harry’s eyes were searching Louis’ face for any sign of discomfort. There were none to be found though.
Louis wanted this. He moved his hands to cradle Harry’s face, softly caressing his cheekbones. “I would love to have you inside me.”
He was surprised that there was no nervousness in his voice. They had been slowly building up to this though and Louis knew that with Harry, he’d always be safe. He was faced with Harry’s blinding smile before the other boy leaned down to give Louis a passionate kiss.

They moaned into it simultaneously. “Fuck...” Harry began to speak but didn’t finish, because his tongue was back inside Louis’ mouth, his body weight pressing Louis into the mattress.
“I need to get lube.” Another kiss was pressed against Louis’ lips. “But can’t stop kissing you.” Harry linked their hands together, pressing them into the pillow next to Louis’ head. “And I will literally come if you don’t stop pulling my hair, baby.”

Louis moaned at being manhandled like this by Harry. “Haz, please, I need you. Anything.”
“Fuck, Lou, you’re so hot when you’re begging for me.” Harry ground his hips down and sucked another kiss into the sensitive spot below Louis’ ear.

“Lube...” Harry reminded himself. He rolled off of Louis to reach into his nightstand and grab a small bottle. Louis used this moment to inhale a big breath. Remembering how it felt, when Harry rimmed him, he was a little concerned that he wouldn’t last all too long.

Harry came back with the lube bottle and abandoned it next to Louis’ torso in favor of removing his boxers instead while pressing his lips against Louis’ toned abs below his bellybutton.
“Haz, oh god, come up here please.” Louis asked, needing to look at Harry during this moment. “Anything you need, baby. What is it?” Harry moved his hand to Louis’ waist squeezing the skin as if to show he was there.

“Just stay up here please. I need to hug you.” Harry just smiled and kissed Louis who now had one hand at the back of Harry’s head and the other holding on to his side.
Harry kept kissing Louis while grabbing the lube again and coating his fingers. He moved to place himself between Louis’ spread legs. “You ready, baby?”
Louis nodded. Harry touched his finger to Louis’ rim and started softly stroking it to get Louis used to the feeling. He kept his eyes on Louis’ face. Louis let out a long breath.
“Harreh...” It was almost just air. He had his head resting comfortably against the pillows and his eyes closed at their own accord, lips parted on a silent moan.

“So nice and relaxed for me baby. You’re doing so well.” Louis could only nod. “Is everything okay?” Harry asked. Another nod. “Use you’re words, baby.” Louis’ brain couldn’t seem to find any, completely lost in feeling Harry’s fingers against his most sensitive spot. “More, ahhh”, was what left Louis’ lips when he felt Harry applying a little more pressure. Harry slipped the tip of one finger inside. It burned and Louis tensed for a moment, Harry halted his movement. “Breathe, Lou.” Louis inhaled slowly and let the tension leave his body with the air. The burn felt good. He felt like Harry was lighting a fire inside him. He gave him another nod. That had Harry pressing his finger further inside, slowly, until it was all the way in.

Harry had long fingers. Louis could feel the pressure from inside. It felt foreign for Louis but at the same time it made him feel incredibly close to Harry.

“Are you okay, baby? How does it feel?”, Harry inquired.
Louis took a deep breath. “Feels weird, but good weird. I feel really full. I think you can move though.”
Harry started slowly moving his finger in and out. The drag felt incredible and Louis breathing started becoming more and more shallow. Harry started kissing and sucking on Louis’ neck at the same time, making Louis moan out loud.

“Think you can take another, baby?”, Harry lifted his head from Louis’ neck to look at him. “Don’t know, feel really full already, Haz. Fuck, oh God, that feels good. Wanna try.”
Harry removed his finger, suddenly leaving Louis feeling quite empty, to coat two fingers in more lube. He soon returned them to Louis hole and started pressing the fingertips inside. It was a stretch and it definitely hurt, but the feeling of being filled by Harry made it surprisingly good for Louis. Once Harry got to his second knuckle though, Louis tensed in pain.

Harry immediately stopped his movements to let Louis adjust.
“Shh, baby, it’s okay, relax.” He kissed the words against Louis lips and distracted him for a moment, until Louis’ muscles started to relax again. Two fingers felt like so much more than one.
“Keep going Haz. I’m okay.”

Harry pressed the rest of his fingers inside and started kissing Louis passionately to distract him from the additional pain. After a while, Louis started moving his hips against Harry’s fingers, as if he was actively searching for the pressure.

“Mhh, Haz, please move. Need more.”
Harry’s lips started curling into a smirk and he had all of his attention on Louis’ face.
“You ready, baby?” he asked.

“For wha-” he didn’t get to finish that sentence, because Harry crooked his fingers, hitting his prostate dead on.
Louis back arched, his eyes rolling so the back of his head and his mouth opened in a silent scream. After a moment, he moaned loudly.

“Ohhh fuck, Haz...” he took a shallow breath. “Again, please, oh God do that again.”
Harry pressed his fingers against Louis’ prostate again, softly stroking it continuously.

“Ahh, there, yes Haz, yeees, there please don’t stop.” Louis was squirming in the sheets, trying to chase Harry’s touch. He was getting closer and closer to his orgasm but it just wasn’t quite enough. The pleasure in his body was building steadily.

“You look so good baby, fuck, wanna make you come like this. Think you can?” Harry asked him.
“Close, fuck Haz, so close, please.”

Harry changed the movement and started to press short but hard thrust against Louis’ prostate. It had Louis inhale sharply, his eyes popping open. Harry leaned down to Louis’ open mouth, their lips touching.

“Come for me, baby.” He pressed his tongue into Louis’ mouth the moment he thrust against his prostate. Louis arched up and came with a moan into the kiss.
“Harry...” he said breathlessly. He had never before come this hard and felt the orgasm for longer than ever before.

Harry carefully removed his fingers and wiped them on the sheets.

He moved to grab a flannel, Louis whining the second Harry let go of him. Harry returned and cleaned Louis up. Louis could see that Harry was painfully hard and returned the favor with a quick handjob, since it didn’t take much for Harry to come, too.

They snuggled for the rest of the morning, both not really willing to leave the bed.

"That felt incredible, Haz. Thank you for showing me." "Nothing to thank me for, Lou, I love taking care of you."