Chapter Text
Getting into the whale had been a mistake. Sweetheart was filled with regret the moment she set foot on its unfortunately wet tongue, and her misgivings only grew as she was led deeper and deeper by the so called “scientists”. To top it all off, the entire venture had been for naught. The clones, her supposed perfect suitors, had barely any resemblance to her. The one made of slime was stupid, the metal one was unnecessarily violent, and the only one that looked even remotely like her was incredibly pretentious. Those witch hacks made her blood boil. And unfortunately for her, she was currently seated face to face with them and their mediocre creations. Quite literally face to face, because all three of the Slime Girls only had their heads remaining. It would be a funny sight, if the situation weren’t so bleak. The group was huddled together on an island barely large enough to fit them, surrounded by the bubbling acid of Humphrey’s stomach. Humphrey himself had seemingly fallen asleep after ejecting the four troublesome kids, which left everyone in a serious predicament.
“If I weren’t just a head you’d be in pieces already,” Marina said to Sweetheart. All three of the slime girls completely blamed Sweetheart for their situation, and had been verbally abusing her to pass the time. “What kind of royalty refuses to pay for her own commissions?”
“Individuals as prestigious as I don’t give away hard earned clams will-nilly. Perhaps if any of you had succeeded in crafting me an acceptable clone, I would have paid your ridiculous fee.” Sweetheart leaned forward, sneering.
“Darling, we already know you came with no money. You’re broke, admit it.” Sweetheart gasped at Molly’s accusation.
“Me? Clamless? Ohohoho!” Sweetheart pulled a folding fan out of nowhere to laugh into, and tucked it back into her dress before continuing. “My fortunes are simply stashed away in a secure location, safe from the likes of you.”
“Well your ‘safe fortunes’ aren’t of much use here, doll,” Medusa said. “Without clams to feed Humphrey, we’ll never escape his stomach.”
“Maybe you witches should have purchased actual property instead of building inside of a whale,” Sweetheart said. “For example, I own a castle, and it hasn’t eaten me alive once.” This was the third time Sweetheart had brought up her castle, and the Slime Girls were starting to get annoyed.
“Yes lady, we get it, you have a stupid castle,” Marina snapped. “It’s not going to help us get out of here, so quit bringing it up.” Sweetheart let out an indignant hmph and stuck her nose up in the air.
“Swimming with the fishes sounded relaxing, but it’s starting to get boring” Molly lamented. “If only we had something, anything, to feed Humphrey, maybe we could buy ourselves enough time to escape.”
“Something tasty,” Medusa said.
“And expendable,” Marina added.
“And jelly-filled,” Molly finished. The three of them turned pointedly to Sweetheart.
“Surely you must be joking!” Sweetheart scoffed. “If we must choose a sacrifice, might I suggest the barely sentient slime instead?” She gestured toward Mutantheart, who was listening to the interaction with a vacant smile on her face.
“Blooh?”
“No way!” Marina said. “She might not be my most… successful creation, but she’s grown on me. She’s endearing and cute, and I think you’re jealous because you’re neither of those things. Now why don’t you hop in the acid before we’re forced to persuade you.” Sweetheart narrowed her eyes and instinctively reached for her mace. The Slime Girls had overstepped their bounds, and they had to be taught a lesson. It seemed a show of force was necessary to regain control. In a fluid motion, she brought the mace down on Marina. However, much to her surprise and annoyance, she was a second too slow. Marina’s head rolled away from the point of impact. Sweetheart was shocked at being outsped by a severed head.
“Let’s throw her in!” Marina yelled, rolling herself forward and ramming into Sweetheart’s ankle.
“Anything to be rid of this pest,” Medusa added before rolling herself into the other foot.
“Down with the monarchy!” called Molly, seemingly content to remain in her place and watch her sisters do all of the work. And despite being only heads, the two Slime Girls were having success. Sweetheart was simply not fast enough to keep up with them, and her mace always seemed to land a split second too late no matter where she aimed. With the repeated blows to her feet and legs, she was forced to back up closer and closer to the edge.
“Get off of me you little pea—” Sweetheart was cut short by a simultaneous impact from both girls, sending her tumbling backwards. Sweetheart felt a distinct dropping sensation in her gut when her backpedaling feet met nothing but air. The same feeling one gets after underestimating the amount of stairs left at the bottom of a staircase. Except instead of a mildly painful landing, she was about to be completely dissolved in acid, her delicious jelly filling wasted on an all-consuming whale. And to top it all off, her last sight would be the smug looks of all three Slime Girls, who had managed to best her with seemingly no effort at all. Just as her demise seemed inevitable, Sweetheart’s descent was cut short. Something had stopped her fall, something soft yet strong. It hoisted her back up onto the platform. Confusion was written on the Slime Girls’ faces. Sweetheart stumbled away from the edge, and quickly turned around to face her savior.
“You?!” she exclaimed, her confusion rapidly giving way for shock. The rescuer was none other than Perfectheart, who had somehow moved to save her in the blink of an eye and lifted her back to safety without breaking a sweat. “How did you— Why…?” For once in her life at a loss for words, Sweetheart searched Perfectheart’s neutral expression for a reason.
“I’d like to know why you saved her too,” Medusa said. “I have no sympathy left to give her, and I don’t understand why you would.”
“I was looking forward to some peace and quiet,” Molly said with a pouting expression. Perfectheart turned to the Slime Girls, ready to explain herself.
“Killing Sweetheart now would be an irrational decision,” Perfectheart said. “While she may be irritating, difficult, impolite, and all around a terrible individual, I do believe she has potential for improvement. I am curious if exposure to a better version of herself may inspire change for the better.” There was a pause.
“Ohohohoho! Do you seriously believe that I, the infallible Sweetheart, am in need of improvement?” She crossed her arms in defiance, quickly forgetting her close brush with death. “There is no adding to perfection, although I don’t expect any of you miserable peons to understand.” Perfectheart’s expression remained unchanging, although a brief flash of colour outlined her for a moment.
“Is that so, Sweetheart?” she said, slowly. “Well in that case, if you believe yourself to be beyond fixing, I will be more than happy to return you to your initial position.” She pointedly cast her gaze to the liquid below. Sweetheart shook with anger, mentally preparing several withering remarks that she knew would immediately land her in the acid. She had only one option here. With a loud huff she averted her gaze and scrunched up her face.
“In the interest of self-preservation, I am afraid I have no choice but to… defer to your opinion. For now. Perhaps I may improve some aspects of… my already flawless personality.” Saying that out loud, however insincerely, made Sweetheart feel sick. She turned herself away from everyone and plopped herself on the ground, pouting. Molly was the next to speak up.
“Your hypothesis that Sweetheart is capable of even a shred of betterment is intriguing. However, I don’t think she deserves our mercy…”
“And it sounds like it would take a lot of effort that I’d much rather spend on science,” Medusa said.
“And I was sooo looking forward to the splash she was about to make,” Marina added. “Let’s just toss her in now and forget she ever existed.” Perfectheart realized she would have to change her angle quickly if she wanted the Slime Girls to listen to her.
“Well, there is one additional plus side to sparing Sweetheart’s life now,” Perfectheart said. The Slime Girls raised their eyebrows curiously. “If we keep her around after getting out of this predicament, her life will be absolutely miserable. We can make her do our chores, get her to help out around the laboratories, and even force her to say please and thank you.” Sweetheart turned as if about to say something, but kept her mouth shut. “I imagine being reduced to working class would be a fate worse than death for her. Ohohoho~.” Perfectheart laughed a little, pausing when she realized how similar it sounded to Sweetheart’s. They did share genetic material after all. In fact that was part of the reason Perfectheart felt obligated to interfere in this situation. While she looked to Medusa as her incredibly intelligent mother, she still felt a connection to Sweetheart. Technically Sweetheart would be her… father? She preferred not to think about it. But whatever the relationship was, there was no denying the obligation she felt to at least give her imperfect parent another chance. If that second chance also happened to involve some deserved retribution, so be it.
“Alright, you have certainly done an excellent job of explaining your reasoning, doll,” Medusa said, sighing. “I’d expect nothing less from a perfect creation such as yourself.”
“I guess we can spare her for now, but you’ll be responsible for taking care of her,” Molly said. Marina was the only one yet to speak, and she appeared quite irritated.
“She doesn’t deserve any mercy, she’s a double crossing donut and I can’t stand her.” Marina seemed almost ready to begin a second assault on Sweetheart, but was interrupted by a gooey hand being gently placed on her head. “Huh??” She whipped herself around to see who it was. It was Mutantheart.
“Henno…” Mutantheart burbled endearingly. Marina visibly softened at the sight of her creation. Something about its mindless innocence and strawberry scenting made her feel calmer and less volatile. Mutantheart’s carefree expression changed into what could be perceived as serious. “No… splash,” she said. At that simple request Marina’s mind had been made. She turned back to the group.
“Fine, we can keep her alive. She might be useful for parts later if things don’t pan out.” Sweetheart breathed a subtle sigh of relief at her verdict.
“I am glad, and unsurprised, that the people have voted in my favour. It seems there is no one my charm can’t win over.” Sweetheart pulled out her folding fan and held it over her mouth. “Ohohoho! Ohohohohoho!!! Ohohoh—?!” Roboheart, who had been silent for the entire time in Humphrey’s stomach, reached forward, grabbed the fan, and launched it with incredible force into the acid. It made a satisfying splash.
“TXkgYXBvbG9naWVzLCB5b3VyIGxhdWdodGVyIGNhdXNlcyBtZSBwaHlzaWNhbCBwYWluLg==,” Roboheart said apologetically to Sweetheart.
“You idiot! You utter fool! That was an heirloom! A gift from a friend! Handed down through generations of Sweethearts! I crafted it myself!” Sweetheart was quickly turning a brighter and brighter shade of red, and would likely have resorted to violence, but her tirade was cut short by a violent rumbling. It rang not only through the cavern they were in, but also through the very fabric of Headspace. While they had been talking, a critical confrontation had been taking place in White Space.
The Dreamer fell into the embrace of his emotionless avatar, a mutual understanding now present between them. Omori had served his purpose. He had crafted a blissful paradise free of guilt and despair, carefully curated to obscure all mentions of the Truth. The only factor he had no control over was also the one to send it all crumbling down: the real world. When Sunny chose to leave his house and confront his friends once more, he unwittingly regained some control over his mind. A small amount to begin with, but enough to send the dream’s narrative spiraling into a collision course with the Truth. And unlike previous confrontations with the Truth, Sunny was accepting. He learned to overcome. He learned to cherish. Omori’s knife clattered to the ground. His reign was over.
In that moment as Sunny awoke in the hospital, Headspace was experiencing a fundamental shift in its foundations. The rules of the land had shifted, and the ramifications for its residents would soon become clear. Sunny had more pressing concerns however, having woken up in a room filled with flowers and a large bandage over his right eye. He slowly made his way out of the room and down the hall, where he knew his friends would be waiting. He had something important to tell them.
Back in Headspace, after the rumbling had subsided, a Humphrey bud sprouted from the centre of the island.
“Whale, whale, whale, hello again friends. I don’t mean to alarm you all, but I’m currently feeling the most peculiar of emotions. I don’t know what’s changed, but I suddenly don’t want to eat you all alive.” Humphrey appeared confused, and slightly annoyed at himself. “I’m still really hungry, too, but I can’t bring myself to finish you guys off.”
“Wow Humphrey, I’m flattered,” Molly said. “Decapitating us was alright, but you draw the line at total digestion.” Not wanting to waste their opportunity to escape with snarky remarks, Medusa stepped in.
“Would you be able to do us a teensy favour and perhaps allow us to leave your stomach?” Medusa amped up her politeness level to the max, a skill learned through hundreds of years of dealing with her bickering sisters and their occasionally temperamental landlord. “It’s a lovely place down here in your rumen, don’t get me wrong, but I think I speak for all of us when I say we much prefer your other facilities.”
“Yeah, this place stinks,” Marina added.
“Nyak, nyak! Sure thing! But before I call the elevator, I’m gonna need you guys to promise to feed me pronto. I dunno how much longer this generosity will last with my belly as empty as it is.”
“Sure Humphrey, I’m sure one of the others can feed you,” Molly said.
“Medusa can, it’s her turn anyways,” Marina said.
“Wait a moment, I was under the impression that it was your turn, Marina…”
“No, I think you’re wrong Medusa, I‘m pretty sure I fed him last time,” Marina replied. “We can get Molly to if you can’t.”
“I told you guys earlier, I spent all of my clams on software, I was counting on Brokeheart over here to pay me for the job.”
“I was counting on you to craft me the perfect suitor, yet instead you built me a killer robot!”
“I wish she was a killer robot,” Molly replied.
“SGV5IGd1eXMsIGxldCdzIHN0b3AgZmlnaHRpbmcuLi4=”
“Blooooh…”
“Enough!” Perfectheart exclaimed in a somehow still serene voice. Her telltale glow intensified momentarily, stunning everyone into silence. “Since it appears that no one is willing to offer up their clams, I volunteer to leave Humphrey in search of funds.” At this proposal, Marina turned to Medusa.
“How do we know she isn’t going to abandon us and leave us all to get eaten again?” she whispered. Perfectheart could hear her clearly, but didn’t comment.
“She’s perfect, doll, leaving us to die would be completely against her nature. She wouldn’t even let us dispose of Sweetheart, there’s no way she would lie now.” This explanation satisfied Medusa, who turned back to the group.
“Alright, that’s fine by me,” she said
“Me too, but you have to take Sweetheart with you,” Molly said. “If you don’t one of us might accidentally strangle her.” Sweetheart glared at Molly.
“Sounds like you guys have a plan to feed me,” Humphrey said. “That’s a relief to hear. I’ll call the lift now.” The smaller Humphrey disappeared into the ground, to be replaced momentarily by a larger version. Its mouth opened wide. “Yooo-hoooo! Hop on in!” The group entered the mouth of the elevator Humphrey, somewhat hesitantly. They weren’t eager to get into any mouths anytime soon. Once they had all gotten inside, it rocketed upwards.
Sweetheart looked down below at the rapidly shrinking island they had been stuck on. She had almost died down there, and she owed her survival to the pretentious lookalike that was standing beside her. She turned to look at her savior and scowled. She didn’t owe anyone anything; she was a strong independent donut who needed no sympathy or love. She loved herself and that’s all that mattered. So what was that feeling she had felt when Perfectheart defended her earlier? It had been fleeting, but it wasn’t unwelcome either. Sweetheart was so zoned out she didn’t realize she had been staring directly at Perfectheart’s face. When she snapped back to reality, she was met with a small, yet sincere, smile. She didn’t return it, instead narrowing her eyes and turning away. Everything about Perfectheart irked her, and she was looking forward to ditching her the moment they left Humphrey. Sweetheart had a castle full of adoring fans to attend to, after all.