Chapter Text
It had been months since Alex talked to Jason... just because they had different classes and didn't share any extra curriculars this year...okay that's not entirely true, they shared one class... History..
Right now in history they were talking about the revolution and every time he glanced toward Jason, who was writing notes he would see another very familiar figure sat over a desk writing. Every time he'd shake it off, they aren't the same... Alex is the only one back. Yes his childhood friend had some similarities to his older lover.. like the way their smiles could light up his world or how they'd both fight any bigots... although different times constituted different types of bigots...in this time it was racists, sexists and homophobic people.. back then it was British loyalists or people who bad-mouthed his friends or commander...
He's thinking they're the same person again.. no John and Jason are different... he shook his head to stop himself from the comparison as he went back to writing notes, despite knowing the history already.
He kind of hated knowing all of this since it felt boring, having experienced it but at least he liked his teacher... Mr. Wellington, another person who reminds him of someone from the past... Just the way he exudes authority without meaning to... it's just natural it's so much like General and first president Washington... but it has to be another coincidence, like John and Jason... he doesn't deserve the satisfaction of having two people who know what it's like to live a second life... more so that it's two that he knew and was close to... After everything he did... leaving Laf in France and not even coming personally to help... Being an asshole and not even visiting Herc... not going to help John so maybe he would have lived a longer life.. cheating on Eliza and then airing out his dirty secret for the world to see... and then deciding to piss Burr off and proposing the duel... leaving his wife to take care of their eight kids alone...
God he was the worst... outside of a literal murderer... an adulterer and a widower, Goddamnit! He was a highschool student right now, Alexander Hampton, he had moved here as a kid of about 7, thankfully before a hurricane hit... his mom still died when he was 12 though... it was horrible to watch her die.. to be there again at the death of his second mother,,, but at least he had Jo- Jason to help him through it though it took him a couple years after that to remember his past life.. him and Jason were now in their last year and Alex had remembered two years ago, and since then he's been noticing the similarities between John and Jason, but they mean nothing...
He was sure they meant nothing, he had to be or he'd accidentally slip up and call his friend John... he has almost done that in the past two years, but thankfully was able to catch himself before he had finished speaking the name... the name of a man he really wanted but didn't deserve... He never deserved... but somehow loved him.
He had thought that he'd deserved the best back then... but he'd squandered the chance to have Eliza's complete trust and faith after the Reynolds incident, and he knew that he wouldn't deserve either her or John in their amazingness... sure they obviously weren't perfect, nobody was, but they were to good for him.
This could be a second chance at a life where he has people who care and understand him, but Alec doubts that, it's far from what he deserves... Yes, he can admit that he has done great things like helping start America... Which seeing what the world has become, may have been a mistake... Not to mention the banks. Yes there were good things but those had downsides to them, and he's already thought, countless times about the downright assholey or skummy things he's done,
As much as Alex doesn't want to believe it Jason Little is indeed the reincarnation of John Laurens, and he is currently frustrated, and not at the classwork and all it's boringness, he is frustrated at Alex...
To explain his reasons let's start with that he remembered last year, and realized within the first week that Alex Hampton was indeed Alexander Hamilton, but it took him a couple months to discern that Alex did remember as well... and he's frustrated with trying to figure out how Alex, the genius that he is, hasn't realized the same about him...well he thinks that Alex knows at least subconsciously who Jason used to be. Jason is sure he's heard Alex almost call him John, but stop himself before he finish the simple name.
He thinks all about this while he writes his notes, why must Alex be like this? Why now? He's never kept something like this from him... either time really, granted Jason had realized the truth months ago, but still, this was big and Alex kept himself quiet... it's strange, every time that Jason thought he could bring it up Alex was busy writing an essay or story, or really any type of writing, always in a zone of his own.
Jason is frustrated because he really wants to talk to Alex about this, but the other doesn't seem keen on it... Jason thinks it may be some type of PTSD or something from the past that stops him from talking.. but then again Alex has always been okay with talking to him about the traumatic stuff in his lives...
What the hell is wrong? Jason was frustrated and confused, but most importantly he was concerned for Alex and why he's said nothing. It could really be nothing but he doubts it, this is Alexander, if it was truly not important he would have said something... Plus he's known Alex in this life for about 10 years and he has lived with Jason's family for the last four, almost five years... thankfully his father in this life is much better then Henry Laurens.. If he was, then God only knows what would have happened to Alex in foster care...
Jason had stopped writing his notes for a moment cause his fingers started to ache and so he started twirling his pen around his fingers, accidentally dropping it, it took him a moment to notice that it wasn't in between his middle and pointer fingers, he bent down to pick it up when he reached his hand to the pen, it brushed someone else's very familiar hand.
He looked up past the arm to the face, "Alex-?
"I thought you were distracted or something..." Alex mumbled quietly
"Oh, well uhm, could we talk after class?" Jason asked quietly
"Why are you asking?" Alex asked quietly, "I wouldn't mind talking..."
"It's just something I haven't found the time to ask about before..." Jason explained.
Alex nodded before they went back to doing their notes silently.
Chapter Text
Alex was curious about what Jason wanted to talk about as he put his stuff in his bag, starting to go out to the hall, he was a little anxious for this conversation for some reason. Alex had no idea why he was anxious, even if it was about something personal it can't be that bad, right?
"I think this is a little personal," Jason said once they were in the hall, "maybe we should find an empty classroom to talk in?"
"Sure..." Alex said anxiety building. he has a suspicion of what this might be, but he won't believe it until he's heard it.
He and Jason were quiet as they walked to an empty classroom, devoid of even a teacher in it, thankfully it was lunch so they had no class for 40 minutes.
"Alex," Jason sighs, "I know what you've been hiding..." He said and before Alex could even say his thought, "no you haven't been doing a bad job at hiding, I just remember my past life..."
Alex's eyes widened, "no... this is a dream..." It has to be. just like the other dreams he's had, "this isn't real... You're not..." Alex trailed off at a familiar look in his friends eyes.
"Alexander," Jason said in an all to familiar way, this was a dream it had to be, "This IS real, and I know you've known, but you're denying it, why?"
"Because..." Alex swallowed trying to calm his racing heart, "because I... I don't deserve it... after what I have done... and if I let myself believe that it's real, I will want what we had, knowing the consequences of being gay aren't nearly as bad as they were back then... but knowing what I did to Eliza last time... I might end up doing that to any significant other I may have in the future... No matter how much I love them, if I let myself believe you are..." he trailed off, knowing that if this is another dream, Jason knows what he's gonna say
"If you believe, I'm who Alex?" Jason asked though his gaze was both sad and knowing.
"John..." Alex said quietly not having really meant to, but he could never keep anything from him... either of them, "Laurens..." He looked away from that knowing amber gaze. he knows he'll wake up soon, and his life will be normal again, only talking to Jason about present life stuff, Jason not being John... Better yet, back to Alex not even remembering his past life so he couldn't recognize the similarities between John and Jason, like the way he likes to put his long blond hair up in a pony tail.. or his beautiful eyes.. blue in the past, amber now... No! He's doing it again they aren't the same, this is a dream!
"Alexander."
"No..." Alex mumbled, "I don't deserve-"
he was cut off when he was pulled into a hug, "you do deserve this, you have a second chance, we both do, you aren't the same as you were back then, you've changed for the better, you may still be a slight workaholic, but I've seen you take breaks sometimes," Jason(John?) let out a little chuckle, you're the same, yet different."
"Yeah... but I can't help my caution with accepting that this isn't a dream..." Alex mumbled,
"Could I try something drastic?" The blond asked softly
"Uhm... sure," Alex answered
He heard a soft intake of breath from the other before he leaned down and..
Alex barely registered at first when he felt lips on his, feeling his face heat up with a blush when he realized what was happening and he kissed back.
When they pulled away after what felt like so long but at the same time not nearly long enough Alex mumbled breathlessly, "pinch me..." although it was mostly a joke, since at this point he realized it was real.
Jason laughed as he pinched Alex lightly in the side.
"Hey!" Alex squawked indignantly, "I didn't actually mean it!"
"I know shorty," the taller boy grinned
"I'm 5"8! You're just tall!" Alex pouted
"I'm only 6"1 there are many taller people even at this school. Stop being in denial," Jason grinned
"Shush," Alex mumbled, "and we should probably get to lunch before it ends,"
"Oh shit, you're right," Jason said as he took his hand
Alex blushed a little more but grinned "of course I am," he said as he and Jason -or John- whatever.. he'll probably only call him John in private, anyway they walked to the cafeteria,
Jason was glad that he had Alex back not that they weren't still close before this but he was glad to know that he;s here and be sure that his love knows that it's him. As they walked to the cafeteria, Jason felt something vibrating in his pocket.
He blinked as he stopped and took his phone out, "It's dad," he told Alex
"Hendrik?" The shorter teen asked
"Who else? Henry?" Jason snorted unaware of the surprise he'd have in just a few moments as he answered his phone
"You just jinxed yourself," Alex mumbled
Jason ignored his friend/lover/whatever they were now as he answered the call , "hey, dad," he said, "what's wrong? Did something happen to mom? Martha? Hen?" It was weird how his present life siblings had the same or similar names as his past life ones, but he was ignoring the coincidence as he had been for the last year,
"Jack...?" And that simple two syllable name from his father made him fall silent for a moment.
it was a minute before Jason spoke again, "Dad...? What did you just call me?" Jason bit his lip, it couldn't be, could it?
When Jason realized it'd been silent for a couple minutes he softly asked, "...Dad?"
"O-oh sorry," he'd never heard his father in either life sound so vulnerable and small. in his first Henry Laurens had been a complete asswhole and in this one Hendrik Little was the father who would protect his family with his life... This... was completely new
"So.. is this about the past?" Jason asked.
"Yeah..." Hendrik answered...
"Can we talk when I get home? Alex and I are going to lunch and we only have 20 minutes,"
"Okay, bye son."
"Bye dad," Jason said hanging up.
"Sooo..." Alex looked to his side at Jason as they continued walking
"Well it turns out that my Dad was my dad back then," Jason sighed
"I mean I coulda guessed by the fact that you mentioned the past." Alex shrugged
"That's kinda all, we're gonna talk after school."
After that they went to the cafeteria and chose a table before going to get their food. They had a good time just eating and talking through lunch.
As Jason walked alone to his second last period of the day. he couldn't help but wonder why his dad seemed so broken up, he hadn't been that bad in his past life. He was bad yeah, he had yelled at John for being gay and how wrong that was, but that was all, and it was all in the past, Hendrik wasn't the same as Henry anymore, he might have the memories but Henry Laurens, the 1800s south Carolinian, conservative senate member and Hendrik Little, the Liberal amazing father, were two different people as much as they were the same, just like Jason Little and John Laurens.
AAAAA05 on Chapter 1 Tue 26 Dec 2023 04:54AM UTC
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SomeonesBestFriend11 on Chapter 1 Tue 26 Dec 2023 01:41PM UTC
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Eclipse_Moon_666 on Chapter 1 Wed 27 Dec 2023 01:51AM UTC
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SomeonesBestFriend11 on Chapter 1 Wed 27 Dec 2023 01:58AM UTC
Last Edited Wed 27 Dec 2023 02:05PM UTC
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