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“Ok, so let me get this straight, you think making gingerbread biscuits and doing little couple things with someone else’s girlfriend is a great plan?” Dave asked as he and Karl strolled down the baking aisle of the supermarket.
“She is not someone else’s girlfriend. She is my girlfriend. Rufus died, I was the man she’s moved on with after grieving him being dead. But now the douche canoe is back from the dead and she’s got big emotions about it. So, my plan is to be an exceptional boyfriend. Jiya loves Christmas, I’m giving her the Hallmark of Christmases,” Karl explained, he really didn't understand how Dave or anyone else he'd discuss this with could not get it. It was a simple plan that would reap great rewards.
“I’m pretty sure people can only die once,” Dave told him as he got hung on Rufus still being resurrected. Rufus and Connor had a million explanations, but Karl simplified it as some temporal ripple effect from Wyatt farting in the wrong direction. The doughnut soldier ate like he was still 20 but his colon was definitely 40 something.
“Yeah, you’d think, but time travel is a bitch and I remember killing you and it clearly didn’t stick,” Karl pointed out before he grabbed a couple kilo bags of flour and sugar from the shelf and tossed it in the trolley.
“I’m grateful it didn’t stick, but I don’t see how smothering Jiya with Christmas will help keep her. If she still loves Rufus, then you can’t stop them,” Dave warned him. Karl turned to him with a frustrated expression.
“I see you’re not on my side here,” Karl told him, did their newly formed friendship mean nothing to giant man?
“You did kill me,” Dave pointed out, “Metaphorically in a video game and I take that pretty personally,” Dave smiled at the woman who looked at them oddly, “Hi,” he said in a charming manner. It didn’t seem to change her opinion of them as she kept looking at them strangely as she passed them in the aisle.
“I apologise, but come on, that Rufus is a total dick. He comes back from the dead spewing all this weird shit about how Lucy and Wyatt should be together and killing a pregnant chick is a great idea,” Karl pointed out as they continued down the aisle.
“I’ll admit he’s a little more unhinged than I remembered,” Dave conceded.
“He treats us all like shit, but he treats Jiya the worst. The passive aggressive shit he does, it makes me want to kill him. But noooo, we apparently need his ‘genius’. So, I refrain and I don’t want to be like him or push Jiya into his arms or any shit like that as I am the better man,” Karl told Dave.
“You think so?” Dave asked in a sceptical manner. They both started pulling containers of sprinkles that were various shapes and sizes. Then moved onto the ingredients they'd need for icing.
“I know so,” Karl said, he turned to see Dave smiling at him, “What?”
“I think it’s cute, you’re love with her,” Dave told him.
“Yeah, not like you have much faith in my chances of keeping her,” Karl grumbled as he felt a little self-conscious at admitting such a thing in front of another dude.
“I don’t have faith in your plan. Usually, big gestures tend to go over like a lead balloon,” Dave said before he moved down to the dried fruit section to find dates for his Grandmother's recipe for Sticky Date pudding.
“Then what do you suggest?” Karl asked as he followed Dave.
“Just being there for her, supporting her,” Dave said as if it was straightforward.
“I’m already doing that, and how is this a huge gesture?” Karl asked him, he felt his gesture was fairly mild compared to what he could do.
“Well, we’re supposed to be keeping a low profile and I’m pretty sure a 40 ft inflatable Santa on the front lawn is going above and beyond,” Dave answered.
“Fine, we won’t do the outdoor decorations, but the cookies and movies are happening," Karl told him.
"Fine with me, now we need to go get some butter," Dave replied as he looked down at their shopping list.