Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Sergeant, you got a call.” Price welcomed Soap into his office, “Said it was important, something about your family.”

Soap nodded, stomach suddenly uneasy. He could see the worry in Prices eyes at his hesitation- Price may not have known much but he knew enough.

Price handed Soap the phone, “I’ll give you a few minutes.” He said quietly, patting Soap on the back.

Soap just held the phone until Price left, taking a deep breath before putting it up to his ear, “Hello?”

”John?” A female voice called.

”Amelia?” 

Soap’s sister. The only one in his family that actually seemed to give a shit about him.

”John!” The woman practically screamed, “Why haven’t you called me? I’ve been worried sick about you.”

”I know.” Soap sighed.

”You got shot and we talked a little but after that it was nothing! Why didn’t you return any of my calls?”

”Hey-“

”Then you sent that letter about you going back into the military and I’ve been worried sick! I haven’t heard anything for two weeks, why didn’t you say anything, you could have been dead again!”

“Amelia!” Soap barked, “Calm down, I’m fine.”

”Why didn’t you say anything?” Her voice was soft, almost like she was pleading for answers.

”I’m sorry. I was just… busy.”

”Explain. Please explain.” Amelia begged.

Soap sighed, “Things just weren’t easy when I first got back. Faking your death to people who have basically become your family doesn’t blow over well, especially not with-“ Soap stopped himself, not sure if he wanted to explain the development in the crush he had on Ghost.

There was a short silence, “John… Especially not with what?”

Soap felt stupid. Just at the thought of telling her about how things worked out with Ghost made him blush like a teenage girl.

”Well, you know how I’d told you about my lieutenant?” Soap started, wishing he could just stop himself from talking.

”The one you wanted to, and I quote, break a bed in with?” Amelia deadpanned.

Soap scoffed, “Yes. Well long story short we broke multiple beds.”

That wasn’t a lie. Poor Price had to replace the mattress two times and the bed frame four- threatening to leave them without a bed if it kept happening. They did of course apologize, not for breaking the bed because well- sometimes it was nice having it rough- but for the fact that it was Price who had to deal with the damage.

”Wait you two actually fucked.” Amelia gasped loudly, “I thought you’d die before anything between you two happened.”

”To be fair, I kinda did.”

”Barely.”

Soap laughed, feeling the weight in him turn to feathers. Amelia dropped what felt like hundreds of questions on Soap- some so quickly after another that Soap didn’t even have time to answer them all.

He was forced to explain how for the first little while Ghost either helped him with a few things or he acted like he wanted to kill him. Soap did avoid the little suicide attempt- he was never going too, he hoped at least, he was just tired and needed a break- but he did explain how everything kinda grew off the fact he never really apologized. Amelia berated him for that.

Still, he enjoyed every minute of it, finally catching up with her- knowing what was actually going on in her life for the first time in years. He got to prod into her little escapades in the wilderness, photographing everything she thought pretty, getting to travel the world like Soap but under a lot nicer circumstances.

They went on for so long Soap wondered if Price had just gone elsewhere or if he was enjoying some time in the break room. Like everything it had to come to an end, and the moment of bliss Soap felt dulled- reality hitting him like a bullet.

”It was really baltic but kinda nice.” Amelia chuckled, recalling the time she’d gotten lost while trying to photograph some owls in winter.

Soap nodded to himself, lips in a thin line, “I really enjoyed catching up with you-“

”Yeah, me too.”

”But… what did you really call about? I know you didn’t go through the trouble of somehow calling my captain just to share stories.” Soap sighed and he could hear Amelia sigh too.

The silence after gave Soap a headache, stomach uneasy once again.

Amelia sucked in a sharp breath, ”Mom wanted both of us over for Christmas…”

“Oh, I see.” Soap huffed, “Still doing everything for her because she just can’t seem to talk to me.” 

“John, she tried to get ahold of you but it isn’t easy so she just asked me to give it a try. She just wants to see us again.”

Soap finally decided to sit, taking Prices chair since he wouldn’t ever know and running a hand alone the side of his head, feeling the scar there.

”Really? Can’t bother to give me a call after I almost died and now all of a sudden she wants to be a part of our lives?” Soap scoffed, “I don’t think so.”

”John-“ Amelia tried.

”Let me guess, Da wants nothing to do with it. He just wants to drink his life away and, oh I don’t know, maybe b-“

”John!” Amelia yelled, sparks running up Soaps spine, “Mom has cancer.”

Soaps breath hitched in his throat, heart aching.

”She’s dying, John.” Amelia’s voice broke, “It’s in her lungs. Stage four. Doctors say she only has about a year.”

Soap dropped his head into his free hand, running it up and through his hair more. Part of him wanted to believe it was a lie- like many others his mother has told- but something about this just made it seem so real. Guess the cigarettes were finally catching up with her.

“Just… I already agreed and I- I don’t think I can do this without you, John.” Amelia sounded on the verge of tears.

He didn’t blame Amelia, she had been too young to remember most of the things that happened but- he did remember.

Soap sighed again, “Give me some time to think about and I’ll- I’ll call you when I know.”

“Okay John, okay.” Amelia sniffled.

Its not okay.

Soap wrapped his hands slowly, lost in his own world as he watched the fabric weave between his fingers. After finishing both he stretched his hands out to test them before tightening them. The first throw of his fists hit the punching bag hard enough it almost got revenge on Soap when it swung back.

How could he go back?

”Dinner is ready.” His mother called from the kitchen.

Johnny came barreling out, a wide grin on his face as he came up to his mother, baby sister in hand. He knew what was for dinner and it had him excited.

His mother smiled when she saw him, “There’s my birthday boy.” She chuckled, “Why don’t you go sit you and your sister down and I’ll grab your father.”

She carefully handed Johnny his sister, light enough that Johnny could carry her. He had to stop himself from skipping to the table, afraid to drop Amelia, but he made his way over and put her in her stool as his mother had shown him a few weeks back since he had finally grown tall enough. Then with smiling ear to ear he hoisted himself up into his own chair and waited patiently for his parents.

His dad had been watching football like he always did, practically glued to the couch whenever he wasn’t working, so Johnny watched as his mother walked over.

”Hey, why don’t we all go sit at the table for Johnny?” She suggested to him- they rarely ate together anymore, not since his fathers work accident.

His father grumbled, “Why, it’s nothing special.”

Johnny’s throat clenched, having to swallow done the slight pain.

”It’s his birthday, Grant. You’ve been sitting down all day, why not just move to the table for a bit.” He could tell his mother was trying to be understanding- trying.

”I don’t give a fuck.” His father scoffed and now Johnny could hear the slur that meant he’d been drinking again, “ He shouldn’t be coddled. He needs to learn to be a man and that’s not gonna happen if you keep treating him like a baby.”

Johnny watched as his mother finally leaned down over him and grabbed the tv remote, shutting it off, “Grant, that is no way-“

Her words were cut short when his father slapped her, hard enough she stumbled back a few feet with her hand glued to her face.

”Don’t you ever talk to me like that!” His father yelled, loud enough that it startled baby Amelia.

”Grant-“ His mother tried, hurt in her voice.

”I’m the man of the house, you do what I say and that’s it! It’s time you stop playing house and get back to the real world!”

Johnny could only watch as the tears streamed down his mother’s face, betrayal in her heart. After his father turned the tv back on his mother walked to the kitchen, just standing at the counter with her back turned to Johnny. He knew she was trying to stop her tears, present herself normal for him- make everything seem normal.

He may not have been old enough to understand what happened, but he did know it wouldn’t be the last time.

”Soap?”

”Hmm?” Soap stopped his next punch, instead shaking his head clear.

He turned to see Ghost just standing there, a slightly worried look in his eyes.

”You missed lunch.”

”Oh.”

Ghosts eyes seem to trail over Soap until they landed at his hands and then he moved forward quickly, taking Soaps hands in his, “What did you do?”

Soap looked down to see the bloody bandages, confused. He then looked behind him at the punching bag- it was covered in red smears, so many it made Soap wonder how long he’d been bleeding.

”Shit. I didn’t realize.” He gasped softly, finally looking back up at Ghost.

Ghost moved his hands up Soaps arms to guide him to a nearby bench, sitting him down rather forcefully. The pain only now seemed to register in Soaps brain, a sharp wince leaving his lips as he watched Ghost kneel in front of him.

Without a word, Ghost began undoing the wrapping- careful around Soaps knuckles. They were too bloody to really see the damage but it was enough that Soaps hands started to tremble.

”Fuck.” Ghost muttered, carefully trying to access the damage.

”I didn’t mean to.” Soap spoke quietly, staring down at his hands.

Ghosts hands slid up his arms again, gently trying to pull Soap to his feet, “I know. Let’s get you to medical and we can figure it out from there, okay?”

Soap nodded.

“Lucky for you, only three of your knuckles are broken.” The doctor sounded tired, returning with the X-rays they’d taken.

Soap nodded, trying desperately to ignore the way Ghost watched him- whether with disappointment or just frustrated worry, Soap wasn't sure.

”The rest are just bruised and you have multiple lacerations, but nothing that won’t heal in a couple of weeks.” The doctor sighed, “You can get some over the counter anti-inflammatory’s for the pain and swelling but my suggestion is just taking it easy.”

”Yes ma’am.” Soap said quietly, looking down at his bandaged knuckles.

Ghost pressed a hand to the middle of Soaps back, “I’ll make sure of it.”

The doctor gave a small knowing look, “I know you will.”

Soap felt exhausted as Ghost helped him up and out of the little exam room, only stopping briefly for Ghost to grab the pills the doctor mentioned. Ghost guided Soap through the halls, never leaving his side, never even letting a hand disappear.

”I’m sorry, didn’t mean to worry you like that.” Soap sighed, propping himself against a wall while Ghost dug out keys for their room.

After everything that happened- Soaps room being entirely destroyed- Price had given them the option to instead just share Ghosts room since it was big enough for both of them and even had an attached bathroom. They jumped at the offer, knowing they wouldn’t have to worry about sneaking to the others rooms when nights got lonely, not to mention that multiple others shared rooms so people wouldn’t be suspicious as they didn’t want their relationship completely public.

Sure people already had suspicions and most were probably at least 80% sure but they liked the little bit that people didn’t know.

Ghost held the door open for Soap to walk in, practically dragging his feet as he made his way to their bed. He just plopped down face first, letting his feet dangle off the bed as he relaxed into the plush blankets.

The door clicked shut and after a few steps the bed dipped beside Soap, a hand coming to rest on his shoulder, thumb rubbing circles into the clothed skin.

”Wanna tell me what happened?” Ghost asked softly.

Soap groaned, picking up his head to slam it back down, “It’s nothing.”

”Really.” Ghost huffed a laugh, “Nothing had me bringing you to the med wing with bloodied hands?”

Soap turned his head to look at Ghost as he took off his mask and threw it aside.

”C’mon Johnny, I’m just worried about you.” He laid back and scooted down enough to lay a kiss on Soaps forehead.

”I know. I just…” He tried, he really did, but explaining everything to Ghost when he never really talked about any of it- it felt like it would take a lot more than Soap had in him.

There was a moment of silence before Ghost laid another kiss to Soaps forehead, this time keeping his head there, “Does it have to do with your family? Price said you got a call and it seemed serious.”

Soap turned his head away, instead watching while his hand fiddled with the corner of a pillow case where the stitching had gone loose. Ghost had trusted him with his past, the tragedy that was his family, the terrible things Roba did to him- maybe it was Soaps turn to trust him.

”My ma’s dying.” He finally whispered, listening as Ghost went completely silent, “I mean, it could be another lie of hers but it just- it doesn’t feel like that this time.”

He could feel Ghost shift before an arm was draped around his back and Ghost nuzzled into the back of Soaps neck.

”She wants me and my sister back for Christmas but I can’t. Not alone and not with-“ Soap stopped himself, realizing he was going into something that he never wanted to.

But Ghost spoke to question it, “Not with what, Johnny?” He sounded worried.

Soap sucked in a sharp breath, trying to clear his head, “Not with my bastard of a father still kicking.”

Ghost nodded gently into the back of Soaps neck and kissed him softly, a silent understanding.

”But at the same time I can’t let my sister go alone, I’d be letting her down. Leaving her alone… again.”

Soap’s mind ached with the memories of what had happened when he first left for the military, how badly Amelia had been hurt. It wasn’t their father that time but it’s what he did after Amelia had been nearly beaten to death by her boyfriend- the bastard told her it was her fault, he made her blame herself.

”How about I go with you?”

”Wha?” Soap finally turned his head back to look at Ghost, picking himself up some.

”You said you don’t wanna go alone. I’ll go with you.” Ghost insisted, sitting back up.

Soap turned himself over to sit on the edge of the bed, “I can’t ask that of you, and it’s a Christmas thing, you don’t like Christmas.”

”You’re not asking Johnny.” Ghost smiled, “I am.”

Soap stood up and turned to face Ghost, trying to think of what to say, how to not hurt him with the truth.

”And it would be bad of me as your boyfriend to not go.” Ghost brought his hands to Soaps waist, rubbing his side softly.

”That’s- that’s the problem Si… My parents raised us catholic.” He sighed, hoping Ghost would understand without him having to actually say.

Soap watched as Ghost thought a moment before it seemed to click, “Oh. If it makes you uncomfortable I can just go as a friend-“

”No.” Soap wanted to slap him for saying something as stupid as that, “You know what, yeah, you can come with.”

Ghost seemed to relax a bit, trying to pull Soap into himself. Soap let him, wrapping his arms around Ghosts neck to bury his face in his flat blonde hair.

”You stink.”

”I’ve been wearing three layers of black all day, of course I stink.”

Chapter Text

Johnny kept his head down, following his father to the small shed behind their house. He didn’t know what was happening, only that he’d been woken up just as the sun peaked over the horizon by his father and that he needed to follow him.

”Time you learn to be a man, Johnny.” His father huffed- Johnny could still smell the alcohol on him.

He watched as his father opened the shed to grab a rifle out, swinging it over his shoulder before continuing towards a trail they used to walk- not bothering to check if Johnny was still following.

”A man provides for his family. That’s what I’m gonna teach you.”

It was still too cold for Johnny, even in the jacket his father had forced him into. He shivered, having to bite hard just to stop his teeth from chattering. The walk was long and his legs had grown very tired but finally they stopped and his father crouched low.

”Get down.” His father hissed, pillow Johnny roughly down by his arm.

”What’s going on?” Johnny asked, his voice so soft and weak.

Johnny watched his father taken the gun off his shoulder, “You’re going to learn to hunt.” He pulled Johnny closer and stuck the too big gun in his hands.

When it was secure as it could be, Johnnys father began pointing out everything he would need and how to shoot- the scope and the trigger, and where to shoot when a deer came by. Johnny trembled, wether from the cold, the weight of the gun, or the thought of killing, he didn’t know.

His father forced him to stay still for what seemed like hours, eye stuck to the scope and finger planted above the trigger.

Then the most beautiful creature Johnny had ever seen walked out into his sights, reddish fur and a big eyes, a doe. It seemed so peaceful, bending its neck down to nose some snow away and eat whatever was underneath- completely unbothered.

”Shoot it.”

Johnny watched it through the scope, doing his best to keep the dot right where his father had told him but… he couldn’t pull the trigger. He was shaking more and more, finger frozen on the trigger and unable to pull it.

”Shoot it!” His father hissed, not quite loud enough for the doe to hear.

”I-I can’t.” Johnny whined, tears pricking his eyes.

Then the gun was taken from his hands and just as the beautiful animal looked over at, a shot rang out in Johnnys unprotected ears.

The doe stumbled for a mere second before taking off on unsteady legs and as much as Johnny wanted to believe it would be okay he could see the blood on the snow from where he was crouched.

”Now look what you did!” His father yelled, pushing Johnny sideways.

Johnny looked up at him, as the tears began rolling down his cheek, “I’m sorry.” He whispered.

His father stood up, pulling Johnny up by his arm, ”If you’d just shot the stupid thing like a man instead of cowering it wouldn’t have run!” He roared, “Now we have to go get it.”

His father never let go of Johnnys arm this time, instead he pulled him painfully as he tracked the blood in the snow. It would bruise.

The doe hadn’t made it very far, finally having given up in a nearby clearing, right in the middle where the sky could be seen. It just laid there, chest rising and falling shakily, its eyes followed them as they neared but it only briefly tried to run again- leg unable to push its body up.

”I’m sorry.” Johnny cried, not to his father, but to the doe.

His father finally let him go to pull a knife from his belt, “Well, since you couldn’t shoot it, you can finish it off.”

Johnny looked up at him horrified, “No, please no.”

His face stung as his fathers hand came down on it, hard enough it knocked him off his feet and into the cold snow- his clothes had already been soaked through.

”You do what I say.” He growled, grabbing Johnny by his wrist to pull him back up.

Johnny sobbed as his father pulled him closer to the doe, forcing the knife into his hand. He was forced to kneel in front of it, the knife held in his hand tightly by his fathers hand over his.

”Please!” Johnny sobbed, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

The knife in his hand was forced under the jaw of the doe, it stared at him, unmoving but still breathing. Then, with his fathers hand tightening around his own, the knife was forced up.

The terrifying squelch was enough to make Johnnys stomach churn and bile climb up his throat, then the blood rolling down the knife and onto his hand seemed to do it. Johnny turned away, throwing up everything his stomach had until he felt he couldn’t breathe through the burn in his throat.

His father stood and shadowed over him, “You’re weak.” He spat, “You should be ashamed to call yourself my son.”

”I’m sorry.”

Ding

”We will be landing in 10 minutes.”

Soap listened to the female voice, instructing them to gather their stuff before the plane landed. He sighed, a little excited, a lot worried.

Soap looked over to his side where Ghost sat, looking out the window, “Not quitting’ on me now, are you?”

”Hmm?” Ghost turned to look at Soap.

He seemed a lot more relaxed that Soap thought he would, only wearing a simple black hoodie and a black face mask, even just regular jeans with no weapons his anywhere- it made Soap feel a little better about dragging Ghost along though he was sure Ghost wasn’t very happy about not being able to bring a knife.

Soap always dressed more for comfort but for some reason he felt the need to dress up a bit- which really just meant he put on a nicer jacket and an un-stained pair of jeans.

”Not leaving you Johnny.” He finally said when Soaps words registered in his brain, “Just haven’t been on a public plane in… well never now that I think about it.”

“Guess it’s good you’re not scare of flying.” Soap chuckled.

Ghost huffed a laugh, “Maybe I am, maybe I’m just good at hiding it.”

”That’s a load of shit, I know your tells.” He scoffed, reaching down to grabs the small bag he had under his chair.

“Oh really, then what are they?”

”Why would I tell you?”

When the plane touched ground in Glasgow and most of the people had already left, Soap and Ghost made their way out. It wasn’t too packed despite it being only a week till Christmas, which was actually nice since it meant they could get out a lot quicker.

The walk was a bit chilly though it had been rather warm for the season, the sun only now rising. Soap had missed the smell of the air, so different from what he had grown used to- gunpowder and smoke.  Ghost just took in the sights, the old-ish buildings, the half snow covered green plains nearby and the sort of grey-blue hue it had begun to take from the cloudy sky when the sun rose higher.

His dog tags had grown cold on his chest, the attached ring too from when Soap accidentally proposed. He’d wanted to get something to mark the beginning of their relationship and had found a place where customs rings could be made so he had one made with a skull on it and another with a bar of soap. Ghost had a small panic attack when Soap brought him the skull engraved ring before Soap had to desperately explain that it wasn’t a proposal.

He’d be lying if he didn’t say he loved the way Ghost looked both a lot relieved and a little disappointed- a hope for the future.

”Not the most beautiful in my opinion but I’m sure we’ll see better at some point.” Soap huffed a laugh, walking basically hip to hip with Ghost.

Ghosts hand pressed against Soaps while they walked before eventually they intertwined. It made Soap wanna laugh, the thought of how a big man- usually classified as scary- could just guiltlessly hold hands, something Soap always thought of as cute.

They walked liked that the rest of the way, only finally tearing apart so Ghost could hold the door for a couple people while Soap got out of their way. Soap walked in first, Ghost like a giant shadow behind him.

It didn’t take long to spot his sister, the same shade of brown hair, blue eyes, strong jaw and thick eyebrows- though hers were better kept since she’d always been big on “clean” body hair as she’d called it- she even dressed rather similar to Soap. Biggest difference was that she was noticeable shorter than Soap. She noticed him then, waving excitedly from the table she’d chosen in one of the corners.

She stood as Soap neared, throwing out her arms for Soap to just sort of walk into a hug.

”Oh god, I can’t believe it’s been years since I’ve seen you!” She squealed happily, hugging Soap tight enough his chest hurt.

“I missed ya too wee yin.” Soap groaned with a small chuckle, wrapping his arms tightly around Amelia.

She pulled away with a big smile but it quickly disappeared. Soap only had a moment to question it before she reached up and yanked his head down quickly, inspecting the scar on the side of his head.

”What did this!” She gasped loudly.

Soap held her wrists, gently trying to pry her hands off of him but not using a lot of strength, “It’s what almost killed me.” Soap huffed, “Now will ya let me go?”

She met his eyes for a moment before reluctantly bringing her hands back. Soap straightened his back and glanced behind him where Ghost just stood. It was then that Amelia noticed the tall figure, towering over both of them.

”Oh, and who’s this?” She said with a smirk, goving a cocky wink.

Ghost stepped forward, “I’m Ghost- Simon. I mean.”

Amelia tilted her head and looked over at Soap, “So he’s here as your emotional support… ghost?”

“Be nice.” Soap huffed, glancing back at Ghost who seemed more confused than anything, “And yes, he is my emotional support ghost.”

“Well it’s nice to meet you, Simon. I’m Amelia, Mactavish of course.” She smiled again, extending out a hand.

Ghost took it but the moment he did, Amelia pulled him into a hug. Soaps heart seized, jaw practically dropping to the floor and eyes popping out of his head at the fear of a massacre.

But then Ghost hugged her back.

If Soaps eyes could have opened any wider they would have, completely shocked at not only the fact that Ghost let Amelia just hug him unannounced, but that he hugger her back. Sure Soap knew Ghost would never be that violent but he also never thought Ghost would be okay with a hug from a practical stranger.

”I’m happy to welcome you into the family. I know you’ll be good for my brother.” She hummed, finally pulling away.

Ghost nodded, “Don’t think you’d let me live if I wasn’t.”

”You know it.” She winked, “Now I don’t know about you two but I am starving.”

Soap swallowed thickly as Amelia and Ghost took seats across from each other, having to gently shake his head to pretty much make sure he was awake. He then took his seat next to Ghost, who once again took his hand.

The menus already sat in front of them, just the thought of anything on the menu making his stomach growl. Soap didn’t have to look through it though, he remembered exactly what he got every time. Ghost on the other hand seemed to be having trouble.

”Why does most everything come with a side of tomatoes?” He whispered at Soap.

Soap shrugged, “Guess we just like them.”

”I’ll just… get whatever you do.” He finally said, putting his menu on top of Soaps.

”So,” Amelia spoke up, putting her menu on the pile, “What’s with the mask.”

”Amelia-“

Ghost gave Soaps hand a squeeze, “To separate business from pleasure.”

”So is this business or pleasure?” Amelia smirked.

Ghost chuckled lightly and for some reason Soap just knew he was smirking right back at her, “Bit of both.”

“You know John, if you weren’t dating him I think I’d steal him.” She laughed.

”Oh?” Soap huffed a laugh, “What happened the last time you tried dating a military man? Mind telling the group?”

Amelia glared at him, “Bastard.”

Soap took the win.

Finally their meals were order, Soap and Ghost having ordered an omelette with tomatoes of course- Ghost gave his to Soap- and Amelia enjoying buttermilk pancakes that did not come with tomatoes to Ghosts surprise. It didn’t quite dawn on Soap what was so near until he saw his sister’s expression change when they finished eating, and then he couldn’t help but feel what she felt.

“I- uh, I cleaned out my truck to fit you both but it’s gonna be a tight squeeze.” Amelia smiled weakly, “Didn’t expect you to be so big.” Ever her chuckle was weak as she glanced at Ghost.

Soaps hand had been freed from Ghosts when they had eaten but as he ran it anxiously through his hair with his leg bouncing like crazy, Ghosts hand rested upon the leg, rubbing small circles with his thumb.

”So, Amelia, what is it you do for work?” Soap could tell Ghost was trying to calm all their nerves, another thing Soap could add to the list of things he loves about Ghost.

”I’m a professional photographer. Though I do occasionally work at a cafe over in Edina when times are slow.” She nodded, starting to tap her fingers on the table.

Ghost nodded back at her, “Why couldn’t the photographer see straight?”

…

”What?”

”Why couldn’t the photographer see straight?” He repeated.

Amelia looked at him confused for a moment, glancing over at Soap but Soap just shrugged- trying to hide the growing smile on his face.

”Why?” She finally asked hesitantly.

”He took too many shots.”

…

Amelia looked over at Soap with her lips in a thin line, “You have a boyfriend who makes dad jokes? Really?”

”First of all, don’t be mean to him or I’ll fight ya,” Soap scoffed, “second of all, it kept me alive the first time I almost died thank you very much.”

Amelia’s eyes widened, looking both surprised and a little challenged, “Okay well first of all, may I remind you what happened the last time we fought, aka, I won-“

”I had a broken ankle.” Soap argued.

”Boohoo. And second of all, what do you mean the first time? You’ve almost died two times?” She huffed, leaning across the table a bit.

Soap tensed his jaw and gave a fake smile, though Amelia caught on a little too quickly.

”More than two? You’ve almost died more than two times!”

They definitely had the attention of a few other customers by now.

”It was only-“ Soap had to pause to think- Graves and the shadows, Hassan, Makarov- and those were just the ones who actually managed a hit to draw blood.

”What the fuck John! You should have to think about!” Amelia quickly turned towards Ghost, “How did you let it happen?”

Ghost stared at her wide eyed for a moment, “In my defense I saved him the first two times. And Soap is his own person, couldn’t control him even on a leash.”

Amelia finally settled back in her seat but now with a devilish grin. Soap caught on the moment it slipped past Ghosts lips, but in his defense Soap forgot to tell him.

”Soap?” She chuckled lowly, “That’s the ‘call sign’ they gave you?”

Soap watched as Ghost turned red, realizing he made a mistake he didn’t even know could be a mistake. Soap put his hand on Ghosts thigh this time, silently trying to tell him that it wasn’t a big deal.

”Aye, and if I ever hear ya call me it I’ll win a fight even with a broken ankle. Hear me?”

Amelia paused, seemingly weighing her options, “Alright. Reserved for just the boyfriend then?”

”And the team.”

“Right.”

Chapter Text

“Wow, it’s beautiful Johnny.” His mother smiled.

Johnny sat at the table, coloring a sun filled forest with a stream running through it and right next to it a doe. It drank peacefully from the water, in a world where its blood had not been spilt- in a world where Johnnys father never took him up that mountain.

Then Johnny flinched at the sound of the fridge being shut roughly, ”Where’s the fucking beer?”

Johnny tensed, feeling his mother’s presence leave him- part of him was surprised his sister hadn’t woken up from her nap.

”Oh god,” his mother gasped, “We must be out, I-I can go to the store after dinner and-“ 

Johnny listened as his mother let out a pained yelp, the sharp noise of his father’s hand against her face. Johnny could only stare down at the colorful drawing, trying desperately to imagine that’s where he was- with the doe in the forest.

”You alright?” The whispered question came right next to Soaps ear.

Soap looked over to Ghost, tearing his head away from the cold rain-covered window, “Yeah, just got lost is all.”

Somehow they managed to fit all three of them in the small dingy truck, Ghost having ended up in the middle as he’d lost rock paper scissors- though Soap kinda wished he’d just taken the middle so he didn’t have Ghosts heavy ass on his lap. Guess he now understood how Ghost felt every time he used him as a throne.

Soap ran a hand through his hair, thumb brushing the slightly aching scar on the side of his head. It only ever ached when Soap was overly anxious, something that a doctor explained was probably psychosomatic- though Soap found it interesting it had only started after he had made up with everyone and not when he thought his relationship with Ghost was ruined and he’d die a sad lonely man.

”If things don’t work out very well I had a friend reserve a couple motel rooms. They’re pretty nice.” Amelia finally spoke up, the first time since they left the cafe.

”Yeah, that works. Price- our captain- told us not to come back till after Christmas anyway.” Soap sighed, wishing he could just go back to base and pretend none of this was happening.

Ghost leaned his head down against Soaps, “We can have a party if it turns to that, learned how to make just about every drink about two years back.”

”Oh but do you know how to make good Scottish drinks?” Amelia chuckled softly.

”I learned one or two for a special occasion.” Ghost hummed.

Soap had to admit it still surprised him just how quick Ghost had gotten comfortable with Amelia- maybe he was just used to the Mactavish way by now.

“Trying to court a certain person maybe?” She quipped, giving a teasing glance at Soap.

“Why else.”

Wait a minute.

”We’ve only known each other for about two years.” Soap pointed out, looking at Ghost a little confused and flustered.

Ghost laid a kiss on Soaps forehead, “I know.”

“Hah! Don’t know which part of this whole thing is better.” Amelia’s laughs died down rather quickly.

Soap finally looked back out the window and through the rain he could see the old house.

It looked just about the same with its old stone walls, parts of it having seemed to turn orange. The porch out front that Soap had been forced to build but had never finished was now falling apart, probably because Soap had wanted it too and did all he could to sabotage it before leaving. The door and a couple windows looked new but everything else was old- everything else was how he remembered it.

Soap glanced up at the window in the attic, where he used to sit for hours. Before Amelia had been born, when his father was sober, he had converted the attic into Soaps and Amelia’s rooms- so they’d have their own space. While Soap never really liked it when he was really young because of how long it took his mother to get up there when he had nightmares, he appreciated it when his father could no longer climb the stairs.

It was a place to get away, where he knew he was safe and where he knew he could take Amelia if she was ever in danger from him. It was probably the only reason Soap made it out of that house alive.

As they neared Soap watched someone peak out the front door before slowly walking out. It wasn’t until they got really close that Soap finally realized who it was though she looked almost unrecognizable.

His mother’s beautiful dark brown hair had almost completely greyed, her always ageless face had wrinkled and wilted- once so lively eyes completely dead. She had a cane and seemed still unsteady on her feet, coughing into the weathered afternoon air.

The truck pulled to a stop next to a small broken down car that looked just as beat up and old as everything else around. Soap looked over at Amelia, watching her stare at their mother- she looked at her pitifully.

Finally Soap reached a hand across Ghost to grab hers, rubbing it with his thumb, “You’re not alone, okay.” Soap said quietly.

She just smiled weakly and nodded at Soap.

Soap took a deep breath before finally pushing the door open, that sweet smell of rain barely able to mask that of smoke from the chimney. Amelia got out next with Ghost following on Soaps side, standing very closely behind him. They each only had a single bag with them, no one expecting to stay long- Ghost probably had the biggest of the bags and it was a size Soap could deal with comfortably.

Soap let his feet carry him until he stood right in front of the porch, making sure Amelia was behind him, where she’d be safe. Then they just stood there, watching each other as the rain wetted Soaps hair and clothing. Soap bit his cheek to stop the clattering of his teeth and the shiver wreaking up his spine- Soap hadn’t felt that cold in years.

”John.” His mother finally smiled, “Please, come in.”

She just opened the door and stepped aside. Soap took another breath before finally making up the couple steps of the rickety porch, glancing at his mother as he passed her into the slight warmth of the house. Soap knew he was there the moment he took the step inside, hearing the breaths from the chair turned away from him and towards the old tv.

”Amelia.” Their mother sighed.

”Hey ma.”

Soap turned back around just as Ghost was entering, seeing his mother’s eyes widen at the close sight of him.

”Mrs Mactavish.” Ghost said, looking down at her- Ghost had to be at least a foot taller than her.

”Oh, just Ann works good. Are you one of John’s friends?”

Soap couldn’t swallow the anxiety that built in him at such a simple thing.

”Actually I’m his husband.” Ghost said nonchalantly.

Soap almost choked on the air he breathed- the way Ghost had just said it like it was nothing. It did seem to get his fathers attention though, the chair creaking slightly.

”Oh- oh umm. I don’t see a ring.” His mother looked down at Ghosts hands and then Soaps, looking a bit shocked.

Ghost reached down into his hoodie and pulled out his dog tags, the ring Soap had got him on there, “It’s easier to wear them on our dog tags, Johnny has his there too.”

A scoff from the chair took everyone’s attention, Soaps mother just looking sad now. Soap felt his blood boil, taking a step towards the chair.

”S’there a problem?” Soap huffed.

The chair shifted again and after a second or two his father finally stood. Soap thought his mother looked bad but his father looked near death. His skin was pale and rough, eyes sucked into his head and hair practically all gone- not to mention he looked only skin and bone.

”Just surprised you came back, Johnny. Figured you’d die instead of finally killing something.” He chuckled, turning towards the kitchen- probably to get another beer.

Soap ground his teeth together, fists clenched at his sides as he fought the urge to follow his father and beat the living shit out of him. In all fairness he almost did if not for the gentle hand suddenly gripping his wrist. Soap wanted to snap back at Ghost to let him go but he instead walked back into him until the warmth of Ghost was around his back.

Soap looked back over at his mother and sister, seeing the way they diverted their eyes from the scene. When Soap finally took a deep breath and his mother’s small smile had returned, they seemed to slip back into something resembling normalcy.

“Why don’t we get you three settled?” His mother nodded, turning towards the attic stairs.

They together walked up the old stairs and straight into a small hallway with a door on each side. The hallway was covered in dust, the small table at the end looking as if it hadn’t been touched in centuries.

Soap shivered, “Don’t remember it being so cold up here.” He said, leaning a bit more into Ghost.

”Aye.” His mother sighed, rubbing her hands together, “Heaters broke a few years back so we started relying on the old fireplace. I can’t chop wood anymore so we’ve had to stretch whatever I can buy every few weeks and it just became easier tae close up here off. Made the wood last a little longer.”

”What, da- Grant can’t get off his ass and do it.” Amelia scoffed, making a bee-line to her room on the left.

”Amelia, please.” Their mother tried but Amelia simply walked into her room and closed the door.

Soap watched his mother take a deep breath before turning back towards him and Ghost, “I um- before you go in you should know that your father wasn’t very happy when you left.”

”What do you mean?” Soap asked confused, going to his door and opening it.

He didn’t know what he was expecting- maybe everything broken and in bits or the room having been turned into something else but not this.

The room was barren of anything that represented Soap, plain and basic. The bed used to be filled with all sorts of blankets sheets and pillowcases, all different from each other so no two things were the same but now it was just plain blue-ish gray covers. The walls had been painted an off-white, all those drawings he did straight on them now gone. All his paper drawings and his football posters were gone, in fact anything physical that had been Johnnys was gone.

Now all that was left wasn’t even a shell of Soap- he’d been erased.

”He hired someone to come up and turn the room into just a guest room. Had them try and throw out all of your stuff but I managed to save a bit. It’s in the closet.” His mother sighed.

”Johnny.” He heard Ghost start from behind him, voice filled with pity.

Soap stiffen his back to fight the tremble in his spine, turning back around and smiled at the two, “How about I go chop firewood. Grant won’t do it and you’re probably low anyway.”

”Honey-“ his mother tried, Ghost seeming right behind her.

”Simon, darling, make yourself comfortable. I need some air.” He nodded at Ghost and dropped his bag to the floor  before quickly making his way down the stairs. 

Soap didn’t bother going out the back door, not wanting to pass by the chair that rocked gently with the weight of his father. Instead Soap headed right out the front door and walked his way around the house- towards the shed where he knew the axes were kept.

Soap stopped dead in his tracks when he got a glimpse of the trail, rain now pouring down on him. Right at the edge of the woods stood a doe, watching him the same he watched it. She was beautiful.

***

Ghost sighed as he heard the door slam shut, staring down the stairs with Soaps mother. He already hated how this was going- he wanted to just beat Soaps dad to a bloody pulp and hold Soap until he was okay again but he knew he couldn’t. He had to be the one keeping Soap grounded, he needed to be his armor instead of his sword.

He grabbed Soaps bag from the floor and made his way inside the plain room, dropping both their things to the floor and took a seat on the edge of the bed.

”His husband you said?” Ann’s voice came from the doorway.

Ghost looked up at Soaps mother, “Got a problem with that?” He huffed, bending down to take his boots off.

”I- no. It’s just a bit… different.” She stuttered, not seeming sure on her words, “I have my beliefs and opinions but… just keep him safe for me.”

Ghost met her eyes just as she turned to leave, shutting the door behind her. He finished with his boots, putting them by the door before realizing he really wasn’t sure what to do. He looked around, at the bed, the walls, even the desk in the corner and nothing felt like Soap- nothing was Soaps.

His eyes then landed on the closet, feet taking him there before he even knew what he was going to do. His brain did seem to catch up and he pulled the sort of chest out that Soaps mother had said contained the remainder of his things. He picked it up and brought it over to the bed, sighing as he opened it and began pulling out its contents.

The first thing out was a stack of drawings, some sketches of random things, others seeming like anatomy practices, and only one that had color. It was older than the rest and had clearly been through shit, one corner of it had been taped together but there was something so lively about it. Maybe it was the colors, the trees, grass, the creek, or maybe it was the deer that seemed to alive.

Ghost finally put it back down and grabbed out the next thing, a book of some sort- maybe a journal- but it wasn’t something Ghost would go through without Soaps permission. Then came a deflated football and Ghost realized just how little was truly in the box. The only things left were a knife, an old Polaroid camera, and a necklace with two stone hearts hanging from it.

”Hey-“

Ghost jumped like he’d been caught doing something terrible, hand reaching his belt where he’d usually keep a knife though it wasn’t there. 

“Sorry. Didn’t meant to spook ya.” Amelia chuckled softly, peeking her head through the slight open door.

Ghost let his shoulder relax and his arms drop to his sides, “Soaps not here.”

Amelia opened the door more and walked it, closing it quietly behind her, “I know.”

”Then what are you doing here?” Ghost asked a little cautiously.

”I wanted to talk to you.” Amelia said, walking over to the bed, looking at all the things Ghost had brought out, “About John.”

“What about?” Ghost made his way to his bag at the foot of the bed, looking for a dry hoodie.

Amelia moved the things on the bed to the side and jumped up, “Well you see… I’m not going to betray John’s trust by saying anything that he may not of told you.”

”I understand.”

”Okay, well you see-” She took a deep breath, seeming a little restless, “John’s always been a protector- at least as long as I can remember- he protected me from Grant, he even protected our mother despite…”

Ghost saw the way she seemed overwhelmed, not knowing what to say or how to say it. Soap was the same way.

Ghost finally pulled out a hoodie and along with it a blue squishy ball. He threw it at Amelia- who caught it and started playing with it almost immediately- before shucking off his wet hoodie to put on the dry one.

Amelia stared at Ghost a moment before tearing her eyes away, “Okay first of all, my brother is one lucky man.” She chuckled.

Ghost smiled.

”And second of all-“ Amelia finally stood up, turning to face Ghost just as he finished pulling his face out the right hole on the hoodie, “You need to protect him.”

The sudden change in her voice, the way it saddened, caught Ghost off guard. Amelia looked up at him with pleading eyes, still squishing the ball in her hand.

”He’s done enough. For me. For our ma. It’s time someone protected him so promise me you will.”

Ghost sighed- the promise had too many risks, too many unknowns.

A tear rolled down Amelia’s cheek, “Please. I can’t lose him again.”

His heart felt heavy and his throat closed up.

”Alright. I promise.”

Stuck with a promise he had to make but he knew he couldn’t keep.

Chapter Text

“Thank you.”

Ghost was forced a step back at the weight of Amelia rushing into him, wrapping her arms around him and squeezing so much Ghost though she might be trying to kill him. He- just like the first time- eventually hugged her back, resting his head on the top of her head.

”Did I miss something?”

Ghost snapped his eyes up to see Soap, standing at the doorway drenched though he’d wrapped a towel around himself. Amelia pulled away, wiping her eyes and turning to Soap with a smile.

”Just trying to steal your husband is all.” She joked.

”Good luck.” Soap chuckled, bending down to take his soaked boots off.

Amelia left, giving Soap and Ghost their first moment of privacy since they’d left base- always being around either friends or strangers. Soap enjoyed it, throwing his boots over towards Ghosts as he tore his dripping wet socks off his feet and starting a pile of clothes. Next were his pants, jacket, and shirt.

Soap hooked his fingers into the waistband of his boxers, giving Ghost his best seductive smirk, “Give a man some privacy.” Soap chuckled, turning away from Ghost who had been watching intently.

”As much as I would love to bend you over the desk, it is neither the time nor the place.” Ghost smirked back, watching as Soap threw his boxers into the pile and made his way for new clothes, “How are you feeling?”

”Im fine.” He dug out boxers and put them on before continuing for the rest of needed clothes.

Ghost came up behind Soap, reaching a hand for his shoulder, “Johnny-“

Soap couldn’t help but flinch, the memory of the name and sudden touch. Ghost had brought his hand back into himself so quickly as if he’d been burned, even taking a step back.

”I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have- I won’t call you that anymore.” Ghost rushed out, looking heart broken when Soap turned to face him- still in just is boxers.

Soap quickly got to his feet, “No, it’s alright. I like when you call me Johnny. I just got… confused.” Soap felt like the world couldn’t leave his mouth any faster, worried he’d hurt Ghost, “Please. I won’t let him ruin that.”

Ghost slowly stepped forward, reaching out his hands to grab at Soaps arms and carefully pull him into him, giving Soap plenty of time to back away if needed. Soap didn’t, instead pressing into Ghost as hard as he could. He always felt so light in Ghosts arms, like if Ghost ever let go Soap would simply float away- he’s glad he never did.

”Never knew you were so big on hugs.” Soap chuckled, enjoying the warm smell of Ghost.

Ghost huffed a laugh, “Tell anyone and I’ll have ya doing PT with the trainees.”

“Tempting.” Soap pulled away to put on the rest of his clothes.

When he was done pulling on a warm hoodie and cozy socks, Soap settled on the bed next to the pile of things and began scanning through them. He smiled as he picked up the journal and instantly began flipping through it as Ghost rounded the bed and sat behind him- letting Soap lean back against Ghosts chest.

It was filled with more doodles than words really, some pages not even having any words at all. Soap began pointing at a few of the doodles, ones he was more proud of or any ones that he remembered there being some story behind.

”Oh, this is the one I’m most proud of.” Soap smiled, letting Ghost hold the journal in front of both of them.

It was a drawing of some guy- a rather shitty one but Ghost could make out the important details- seemingly minding his own business. The man was young, with dark hair and either really white skin or he just wasn’t shaded very much. There was a book in his weird hands that seemed about halfway through though once again Ghost couldn’t quite make out the details of the book.

”You’ve made a lot of progress.” Ghost simply said, resting his chin on the top of Soaps head.

”You can just say it’s shit.” Soap chuckled.

Ghost hummed, “So, who is the piece of shit?”

Soap elbowed Ghosts ribs before taking the journal from his hands and flipping the page. This one had a photo- probably taken with the camera that had been in the chest- of what seemed to be the man from the drawing.

Ghosts heart sunk a little at what he saw, a young Soap and that boy kissing- looking so happy.

”He was my first boyfriend.” Soap sighed, “I started dating him simply to get a rise out of Grant, though I realized somewhere along the way that I liked men a lot more than women.”

”Hm.” Ghost didn’t know what to say anymore.

”I thought I’d love him forever. Marry him.”

”Oh.”

Soap leaned back and looked up at Ghost, stars in his eyes, “I’m glad I didn’t.”

Ghost felt all the hurt leave him in a breath, smiling down at Soap as he smiled at him.

”So what happened to him?” Ghost asked, now just plain curious.

Soap chuckled, “Caught him sending nudes to other guys. Felt a little too much like cheating for me.”

”I’m surprised you didn’t do anything stupid after.” Ghost huffed a laugh.

”I never said that I didn’t,” Soap scoffed, “blew up his da’s car and blamed it on him.”

They laughed together for a bit, going through a bit more of the stuff in Soaps journal. There were some more drawings, a few more pictures though the rest did not include Soaps ex- Ghost couldn’t help but be glad- and even some things Soap had written down that he pointed out to Ghost.

Ghost took note of the fact that the pages started to die out around when Soap was seventeen, there being less writings and less drawings. It went completely blank with maybe ten pages left, the last page talking about how Soap was about to leave for the military- and he hoped it would kill him before he ever had to come back to this dreadful house.

Ghost didn’t know if Soap had meant for him to read it or if he had just gotten lost reading it for himself- all he knew was that Soap flipped back to the picture of him and his ex and took it out.

”Don’t know why I kept this.” He said honestly.

Ghost watched as Soap reached for the window right over the headboard of his bed- opening it just a crack and slipping the picture out. He was about to ask what Soap was doing when he grabbed the camera and fell back into Ghost.

”Might as well check if this still works.” Soap messed with it before holding it out in front of the both of them and pressing the button on the top.

Ghost really wasn’t given any time to react through the whole thing, really only catching up when the camera began to whir and something started coming out the bottom. Soap gasped as the picture came out, grabbing a corner of it and shaking it violently until a picture started to form on the black.

Finally it was done after a minute or so and Soap held it in front of them proudly, “Thought it’d be fucked after all these years.”

He looked at the two of them, Soaps photography skills not as good his drawing- maybe next time Ghost would actually take off the mask. 

”Guess everything holds a little surprise.” Ghost smiled before letting out a rather quiet yawn.

Soap yawned maybe a second after him, putting the picture in the journal, between two empty pages at the end.

”I think a nap sounds good, do you agree my husband?” Ghost chuckled- he’d always been unable to sleep up in the air.

Soap had napped briefly on the flight over though around three hours in an attendant asked if they wanted food and Soap was all for it.

”Careful there Ghostie, keep saying it and I might start liking it.”

Ghost pulled away from Soap to move everything off the bed, placing everything but the camera and journal back into the chest and sliding it under the bed. He put the camera and journal safely into the drawer of the nightstand- he had no intention of losing either items.

”Can’t see how that’s a bad thing.” Ghost finally replied, looking back at Soap.

Soap was already under the covers and half asleep when Ghost was done. He climbed in and hugged Soap up close to him- the smell of rain and the slight musk of scent filling his nose. It wasn’t a good smell at all but everything else felt so nice he couldn’t be bothered to care.

“The fuck is this?”

Johnny sat tall at the table, simply staring forward as his father circled him- he didn’t regret what he did and he never would.

”I’m trying to teach you to be a man and you go and do this!” His father spat, finally stopping just to Johnnys side.

Johnny slowly brought a hand up to run in through his new mohawk- badly done because he had to do it himself but still he was proud. He yelped in pain as his fathers hand grabbed the mohawk and pulled roughly, almost hard enough to actually pull out hair.

“You think this is funny? Making yourself look like a fag?” He growled, still not letting go of Johnnys hair.

”No. I don’t think it’s funny.” Johnny finally hissed, “I think I like the hair.”

The next thing Johnny knew he was on the floor, hands and arms scrapped from the terrible old wood flooring. He mumbled a curse to himself, trembling from the new pain as he looked back and up at his father. His father simply walked away, leaving Johnny by himself.

He slowly picked himself up, looking at his slightly bloody arms and agitated palms before something caught his attention. His mother stood with his sister, just watching from beside the stairs. Johnny got up to his feet and made his way over, heart heavy from the hurt of everything.

His sister was barely five years old and his mother just let her watch that happen.

”Hey, why don’t we go upstairs?” Johnny asked her, completely ignoring their mother.

Amelia nodded and despite how bad it hurt Johnny extended his hand out for her. She took it gladly and slowly he walked her up and into his room so he could keep an eye on her.

Johnny could hear his mother begin to talk to his father as he sat little Amelia up on the excessive blanket cover bed. Then came the first gasp as his father hit her- maybe she said something he didn’t like, maybe she didn’t do anything at all- his father hit her again.

”Hey.” Johnny chuckled weakly, seeing his sister listen worrisome.

He reached over and from inside his sticker covered nightstand, he pulled out a necklace. It was meant for her birthday, two stone hearts hung on a chain- the two was an accident, Johnny had meant for it to be two halves of a heart that Amelia could later give half of to someone she truly cared about but it didn’t matter. He’d put all the money he gained from helping his neighbors into that necklace and he knew she would love it.

”Look what I got you.” He smiled as Amelia’s expression brightened.

”It’s beautiful!” She laughed, “Can I wear it now?”

”Of course.”

Johnny put it around her neck gently and moved her long hair out of the way so none of it got stuck in the little connector in the back. After he was done he got up and led her to the small mirror he had next to his closet door- letting her see it on herself.

”Do you like it?” Johnny asked a little worried she may not like it on herself.

She started at it a moment with a straight face before the widest smile Johnny had ever seen grew on her, “I love it! I wanna wear it forever!”

She played with the two stone hearts between her fingers, staring at it through the mirror- mind off what Johnny knew was still going on downstairs.

Chapter Text

“You fucking fag.”

”You disgust me.”

”I wish your mother aborted you.”

Soap jolted up at the loud crash from downstairs and the familiar cry of his mother. He raced off the bed, not caring that he’d woken up Ghost or that he could barely think about what he was doing.

Amelia had her head poked out of her room as Soap went running past her and down the stairs- almost tripping on the last step- to see his mother on the ground. There were burnt biscuits littered around her as well as a silver pan and the still burning stove laid open. Grant stood above her, hand raised for another attack.

As soon as Grant moved to hit her again Soap leapt forward, grabbing his arm and pushing him away.

”Try anything and I’ll show you what the military has given me.” Soap growled, staring Grant down until he eventually backed away.

Soap heard someone else rush down the stairs as he knelt in front of his mother, reaching out a hand to help her up. He couldn’t take her hands though- seemingly having been burnt by the pan- so he gently grabbed her wrists to pull her up. Tears streamed down her face and her cheek looked achingly red.

When Soap finally looked over, both Ghost- who surprisingly did have his mask on- and Amelia stood by the stairs, confused, pissed- he couldn’t care.

”Here, let me take her.” Amelia suggested quietly as she stepped towards them.

Soap nodded, letting Amelia guide their still crying mother away and towards the bathroom. Then his attention was on the chair where Grant had retreated to but the moment he took a step in that direction there was a hand on the nape of his neck.

”Let me-“ Soap started before his eyes met Ghosts, body relaxing at his soft eyes.

”It’s not worth it.” Ghost whispered- if only Soap knew just how much it pained Ghost to say that, to say something he himself didn’t believe.

Soap reluctantly nodded, bringing a hand to the one Ghost had on him and gently rubbing it.

“How about we fix up dinner?” He asked softly and Soap nodded again.

His mother had been making a beef stew Soap had many times in the past- her go to whenever someone was sick- but the biscuits were burnt and when Soap tested the stew it was missing something.

Ghost put the still hot pan in the sink and threw away the charcoal biscuits while Soap searched the cabinets for anything that might fix whatever the stew was missing. He searched through all of the seasonings his mother had but nothing sounded right, nothing sounded like what his mother would put in there.

”Pepper.”

Soaps eyes shot to Ghost who had a spoon in hand- tiny remnants of the stew still on there.

”It can’t be pepper.” Soap huffed, grabbing the pepper anyway.

Ghost stared him down a moment, “I promise you it’s pepper. Take it from someone who spent months doing nothing but cooking.”

”It wasn’t months.” Soap argued, handing the pepper over, “You were gone maybe two.”

Soap watched as Ghost added some pepper and stirred, waiting till it was all in before tasting again and adding more pepper.

”I broke my femur Johnny, I was gone six months.”

Soap shrugged as he watched Ghost taste the stew again, something lighting in his eyes. The spoon was dipped again and Ghost brought it up to Soaps mouth, letting Soap taste it. Soaps eyes lit up at it finally tasting like it should and maybe a little surprised that pepper was what it was missing.

”I refuse to believe you added just pepper.” Soap joked, grinning at Ghost.

Ghost crossed his arms, “Maybe I did but that would make you blind. You watched me the entire time.” He chuckled.

Soap opened his mouth to quip something back but a loud scoff broke the moment of bliss- the moment that had Soap forgetting where he was and why. Soap scowled over at the chair before he just felt tired, too tired to fight him. They hadn’t even been here a day and still Grant brought out the worst of Soap, still he managed to get under Soaps skin and practically torture him.

He could feel Ghost right behind him, preparing to probably pull him into a hug but Soap realized he really didn’t want one. Soap stepped forward before Ghost could wrap his arms around him and just as he turned back to him to say anything to change the subject, Amelia and his mother walked out.

His mother’s eyes were red but she didn’t shed any more tears, fingers lightly bandaged and cheek still red.

”Thank you for cleaning up.” She sniffled, letting Amelia guide her to a seat at the table.

”Me and Simon finished the stew.” Soap simply said, not sure what to do.

”Oh.” His mother smiled, “Let me get us some bowls.”

She began to stand but Ghost cut her off, “I can get them, everyone should sit.”

“I can help-“ Soap started but Ghost once again cut in.

”Sit.”

Soap caught the look in his eye, the one that usually meant he had some sort of plan- he trusted that look.

Soap took the seat at the end of the table, facing the living room while his mother was just to his right and his sister next to her. He watched as Ghost pulled out not four but five bowls and filled each with a decent amount of stew. One by one he brought them and silverware over, first to Amelia, then to Soaps mother, then Soap, where Ghost would be sitting to Soaps left, and one at the seat across from Soap.

Saying he was confused was an understatement. The extra bowl had Soap wondering if maybe he invited Gaz, Price, or even Laswell- or maybe Ghost had just lost it and couldn’t count anymore.

Then Soaps heart sank as he watched Ghost stroll calmly into the living room, both Amelia and their mother watching too.  Then he was right behind the chair, looking at Grant.

Soap couldn’t see if Grant had noticed him or if he even cared but whatever it was, Ghost was about to make himself known.

”You’re eating at the table.” He said, tone making it sound more like a demand.

”Fuck off ye ugly fag.” Grant huffed.

Soap about leapt from his seat just to go beat the shit out of him but it seemed Ghost wasn’t taking any shit. He roughly grabbed the back of Grants neck, forcing him up. Grant did try to fight all while Soap, Amelia, and their mother watched in shock at what was happening.

Grants attempts did nothing, Ghost managing to keep the hand rough on his neck while capturing both of his wrists in an iron grip.

”Let go of me you piece o’ shite!” Grant growled as Ghost forced him towards the kitchen.

Grant could do nothing but squirm in Ghosts hold while he was pushed into the dining area and then forced down into the chair across from Soap.

”Stay or I’ll make you.” Ghost huffed, finally letting go.

Grant looked just about ready to spit more insults until he caught Ghosts glare- the eyes that could scare away even the bravest of rookies. Then Grant looked at Soap just as Ghost moved to his chair, an ugly expression painting his already ugly face.

Grant settled into the chair, “I could have you arrested for that.” He spat at Ghost.

Ghost didn’t seem bothered, not even looking over at Grant. Soap, Amelia, and their mother still just watched with wide eyes, not sure what to say or do. Then Ghost just started eating the stew and everyone seemed to follow suit.

Saying it was awkward would be the biggest understatement of the century; everyone slowly eating the stew, occasionally glancing at each other. Ghost was the only one who didn’t seem to care, almost like he thrived in the uncomfortable situation. Maybe he did.

Soap couldn’t even remember the last Grant sat at the table with them- he couldn’t remember a time Grant wasn’t a complete asshole and a terrible father but that was beside the point. It was even rare in Soaps time at the house that his mother would sit and eat with him and Amelia. His mother had picked up the smoking habit and became so distant that Soap had to act out just for any attention.

”So Ann.” Ghost broke through the loud silence, everyone’s eyes snapping to him, “What do you do for work?”

Soaps mother took a second, like the words just wouldn’t process in her head, “Oh. I um- I haven’t worked in years really.”

”Why’s that?” Ghost asked rather nonchalantly- like this was some normal “meet the parents”.

Soap ran his hand over his hair, thumb brushing the scar that ached ever so slightly. He didn’t know where any of this was going and he didn’t want it to continue.

”Well I- um- I was going to be a nurse but then I got pregnant with John. Grant figured it be best I become a stay at home mother so he could work on his career and when John would be old enough I could continue with mine but… I guess it just never worked out that way.” She seemed sad talking about it, glancing at Grant with… regret, “But I guess it’s too late to dwell on it. Lung cancer isn’t exactly-“

”Oh shut up with the sob story.” Grant huffed, “If I’d known you’d whine so much I wouldn’t have married you.”

”Great, you’d be doing mom a favor.” Amelia cut in before anything else could be said.

Grant stood, ”You shouldn’t be traveling all over the goddamn world, you should be in a home, cooking a man dinner! Cunts like you and your mother are only good for-“

Soap jumped to his feet then, “Don’t you fucking talk to my sister like that!”

”I’ll talk to your sister however the fuck I want, neither of you would be here without me! You should be glad I made you!”

Soap threw the chair back, eyes narrowed on Grant as his entire body urged him forward. He made it around the table in mere milliseconds, fists clenched with only one purpose- something he’s wanted to do his entire life.

”Soap!”

Soap through his punch but it didn’t hit Grant. He hadn’t even realized Ghost grabbed his arm to stop him until he turned towards him and his fist connected with Ghosts face, knocking him back and his grip off.

His heart sunk at what he’d done, catching the sight of red on Ghosts lip. Soap couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think- he’d done the one thing he promise himself he would rather die than do. He hurt him.

“I’m sorry.” Soap breathed out, seeing Ghosts hurt eyes- the way he looked at him.

Soaps legs carried him before his mind could catch up, practically running to the front door. He was smart enough to grab a coat from the rack as he passed it, throwing it on while he opened the door quickly.

”Johnny.” He heard Ghost call after him but it was too late.

The door slammed behind Soap as he sped into the cold night, heart racing and the damned scar making his entire head ache. He failed Ghost, he failed Simon. He’d been hurt so many times and Soap was once again one of the abuser.

He promised after coming back that he wouldn’t hurt Simon again, he promised that he wouldn’t leave- and now he was doing both.

He failed him.

***

Ghost hadn’t even been given any time to defend himself when Soap turned his attack onto him. The moment Soaps fist connected with his jaw he’d just felt… confused. He should have been hurt, he should have been upset Soap had punched him when all he was trying to do was help but the moment Ghost saw Soaps face- how could he be upset. How could he blame Soap for it.

Soap had looked horrified when their eyes met, damn near to tears at what he’d done. Ghosts lip was split and his jaw would definitely bruise but it was that look in Soaps eyes that hurt the most.

”I’m sorry.” Soap had mumbled, slowly backing away before he just turned and took off.

Ghost tried to yell for him, tried to run after him but now someone was holding him back.

”Let him go.” Amelia had said like it was nothing, “He needs some time.”

Ghost didn’t want to listen but he did, already worried sick about him. Ann had disappeared down the hall and Grant had gone back to the couch laughing- if it wasn’t for Amelia pulling him away, Ghost would have knocked Grants teeth in.

“Sit.” Amelia commanded, pointing at the bed when she got Ghost to Soaps room.

Ghost did rather quickly before realizing how much it made him feel like a dog- even then he really just wasn’t sure what was going on and how Amelia seemed rather calm with Soap leaving. Amelia paced for a second before sitting down next to him, hands twitching in her lap.

”I-“ Ghost didn’t know what he was gonna say but Amelia cut him off before he could even get anywhere anyway.

”Listen.” She started, taking a deep breath, “I don’t know how you thought bringing Grant to the table would help.”

Ghost prepared an apology- he didn’t really know what he was doing beside the small idea that he wanted to maybe make Grant feel what Soap had always felt- but Amelia elbowed him in the ribs and actually looked at him as she spoke.

”I know you probably had something- something in your head that made you think it would be a good idea so… Just don’t do something like that ever again, you hear me?” Now her voice held feelings from what had happened, now maybe she realized how bad the situation truly was.

Ghost nodded.

”You promised me you’d keep him safe so tell me you understand, tell me you won’t do that again.” Tears pricked her eyes as Amelia spoke, all that anxiety she held finally showing.

Ghost sighed softly, “I won’t ever hurt him like that again. I won’t ever hurt you like that either.”

He meant it. Somehow, in a single day- most of which they didn’t even spend together- Ghost felt Amelia was just as much family as Soap, Gaz, Price, and maybe even Laswell. Seemed like Ghost had a soft spot for stubborn Scot’s with a loud mouth and explosive personality.

Amelia smiled a little bit before pushing herself off the bed and turning to Ghost, “Get a jacket on and meet me outside, it’s a bit too cold to leave John out there.”

“Copy that.”

Ghost grabbed his bigger jacket to sling over his hoodie- getting a little more worried that Soap was out there with only one coat- and made his way down and out into the crispy night air. He watched the white of his breath leave like smoke, only then catching the actual smoke just a couple feet to his left.

There Soaps mother- Ann- stood, hands trembling as she smoked a cigarette, not even really noticing Ghost.

”Those’ll kill you.” Ghost simply said to grab her attention.

She looked over at him and gave a weak smile, “They’ve already killed me. Why stop now.” Her chuckle was just as weak as her smile, but she took a step closer to Ghost.

”Maybe get a couple extra months, I’m sure Amelia would appreciate it.”

Ghost always hated smokes and smoking, especially when Soap would do it on or after a tough mission. He understood needing some sort of high- whether that be sex or alcohol- but smokes just seemed to be one of the worse ones. Soap would be pissed if he knew Ghost was the reason his smokes always went missing.

“I’m not sure I want any more months.” Ann sighed, dropping her smoke and digging the heel of her shoe into it to put it out all the way.

”Why not?” Ghost found himself asking before the little voice in his head could tell him it probably wasn’t a very good question.

”I have no escape from this.” She said, just barely above a whisper, “I’ve had years to realize what Grant is and still… still I just don’t have the balls to stop it. I’ll always admire John for having the strength I never could- defending me even when I’d just watch Grant beat and abuse him.”

Ghost caught the way her voice broke at the end, knowing she lived her life with guilt and regret. He’d be lying if he said he thought she didn’t deserve it but knowing she was a cause of Soaps pain- it wasn’t something he could just forgive and forget.

”I can’t wait for Grant to go to hell, even if I’m dragged down with him. It’s the only way I’ll ever escape this one.” She said with spite, a bit of humor in her tone almost like she’d gladly shake hands with the devil just to see Grant gone.

The door flew open and Amelia popped out, shutting it loudly behind her. She wasted no time in stopping to say hi, instead already making her way to the truck.

”I know where he is, let’s go!” She called out.

Ghost took a moment to nod a goodbye to Ann before following Amelia. He needed to find Soap.