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Cas loved his brother. He told himself this constantly. Gabe was funny and friendly and had done so much to help Cas with his social anxiety and getting out to meet people. These were the things he constantly reminded himself of because if he didn’t, he was likely to wrap his hands around said brother’s neck and squeeze.
Cas had gone to college two states away in order to get some distance from his homophobic parents, but distancing himself from them meant leaving Gabe behind as well since his brother lived and worked in their hometown. He still talked to his brother regularly as Gabe called no less than twice a week and they talked on Skype at least once every week. His brother insisted that he get out and meet people, even if he didn’t do the crowded bars or clubs. Talking to people in one of the various cafés around campus was a good start, and Cas decided to take his advice. That was how he met Hannah. She was sitting quietly, reading a book that he had recently finished reading himself, and he had surprised himself when he approached her and struck up a conversation about it. That had been freshman year. Here it was senior year and he was still friends with Hannah. She was as quiet and soft spoken as he was, introverted like him. It was comforting having a friend that understood. There had never been anything romantic between them. She had a boyfriend and he was gay. It was a pressure free friendship that he was proud of himself for having forged.
In his sophomore year, Gabe moved to town. Later Cas would learn that he had come out to his parents as pansexual, and they had been less than thrilled. He had then decided to move closer to the one family member he knew would accept him as he was. And Cas did accept him. He loved his brother, even if he was the most annoying person on the entire, godforsaken planet.
Gabe had graduated college four years ahead of Cas yet he was constantly showing up on campus. Cas would be walking from the psych building to the history building and see the familiar head of hair sitting on a bench, chatting with anyone that happened to pass by. Sometimes he envied his brother’s ability to just strike up conversations with anyone, regardless of where he was. Cas had difficulty just raising his hand in class to ask a question. Once a conversation was actually started though, he was usually ok to keep it going. It was just the getting started part that he sucked at.
Sometimes Gabe found him as he sat at a café doing homework and sipping coffee. Times when he really just wanted to be alone with his thoughts, but his brother never seemed to comprehend that, and even when he did, he didn’t respect it. Moments like that were the most frustrating.
Cas was three months away from graduating. He just wanted to survive this last semester and get on with his life. Gabe had gone and gotten a position in the admissions department, so he saw even more of his brother than before. Gabe liked to randomly show up at his dorm room to drag him out places, and tonight was no different. He had just finished a paper on civil rights when he heard a familiar knock at the door. Holding his breath and pretending he wasn’t home wouldn’t do any good. Gabe just knew.
“Open the door, Cassie, I know you’re in there!” His brother sang out. With a groan and an eye roll Cas got up and opened the door.
“What do you want? Don’t you have a life?” He complained as his brother slid past him and into the room.
“Of course I do, and you should have one too!” His brother turned to look at him, his smile fading into a critical look as he appraised his younger brother’s clothing.
“What?” Cas put his hands on his hips, already annoyed.
“You need to change. Come on, we’re going out.” Gabe went to his dresser and began fishing around. Part of Cas wanted to protest, to continue to hide in his room, but it was Friday and he was bored, and though he didn’t want to admit it, Gabe could be fun.
“Where are we going?” Cas walked over to see what clothes his brother was selecting for him.
“I found this cool little place not far from here. It’s a saloon, with wood floors, a jukebox that plays classic rock instead of country, and the hottest damn bartender you’ll ever see in your life. Oh, and killer burgers. We’re going to have a blast!” Gabe found a tee shirt that said ‘I’m With Stupid’ and thrust it at his brother. It had been a gag gift from him the year before and Cas actually liked it.
“Burgers you say? They’re that good?” Cas unbuttoned his dress shirt, sliding it off and putting on the tee shirt.
“Best I’ve ever had, if I’m being honest. You’ll really like them. And something like thirty different kinds of beer. Lots of variety.” Gabe looked at his brother’s jeans one last time before deciding they would be satisfactory. He reached up to muss Cas’ hair, earning him a slap on the hand.
“Stop! Do you know how long it takes me to get it to lay flat?!” Cas complained.
“It looks stupid when it lies flat. It’s better when it’s crazy. I notice the guys that notice you when it looks like you just woke up and walked out the door. This, my dear brother, is sex hair. Drives the men nuts. I was not gifted with sex hair. I have to make up for it by being a beast in the bedroom.” He winked and Cas grimaced.
“Ewww, tmi, Gabe.” Cas went to his desk and grabbed his wallet. “Is this place really crowded?”
“I’ve made sure to go all seven days of the week, and Friday nights are not nearly as crowded as places on campus are. You’ll be fine.” Gabe assured him. It was things like this that Gabe went out of his way to do that told Cas that even when he was being a punk, he really cared.
“Alright. I’m hungry anyways.” Cas sighed.
“Me too!” Gabe clapped his hands together and started for the door. “We’re going to have a blast!”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The saloon looked rundown from the outside and Cas looked skeptically up at the blinking sign that announced it as Harvelle’s Roadhouse.
“It’s better on the inside. I think the goal is to look rustic on the outside.” Gabe nudged his brother and they started for the door.
“I’m taking your word for it.” Cas said. Gabe opened the door and they stepped inside. Well, at least his brother was right about that. It was better on the inside. Gabe was already heading for the bar and he quickly followed.
The place wasn’t packed, and Cas was glad that it was a smoke free environment. As they sat down in tall bar chairs rather than on stools, Cas took a moment to look at the alcohol behind the bar. He spotted the bartender as he poured shots for an older guy and the woman with him further down the bar. The corners of his mouth twitched up into a mischievous smile as he elbowed his brother.
“Is that the ‘hot’ bartender you were talking about?” He teased. Gabe looked down the bar, spotting the man his brother was referring to.
“No way, that’s Ash. He’s nice, but he’s not Dean. Just wait, I know he’s here somewhere.”
Cas flagged down the bartended and ordered himself a beer.
“You’re a young one, so I need to see ID, friend. Policy, sorry.” Ash said. Cas pulled out his wallet and fished out his driver’s license. It wasn’t that he actually had a car, but he at least had the license to do so if he ever invested in one. He handed it over and watched as Ash checked it. With a smile he handed it back and went to pour his beer and mix the fruity drink Gabe has asked for. Cas slid his ID back into his wallet and stuck it back in his pocket.
It didn’t take long for Ash to return with their drinks and Cas turned around in his seat to look at the people on the dance floor. It wasn’t exactly music you could dance to, it was Floyd playing but to his amusement people were trying anyway. Next to him Gabe nudged his arm.
“Here comes Mr. Hottie. Tell me he’s not a dream boat.” Gabe hissed. Cas sighed and turned around just as someone started talking.
“Hey, Gabe! Back again?” The man’s voice was deep and as Cas turned back to look at him he froze. Not only was the man’s voice sexy, but so was the man. His brother hadn’t been kidding.
“Of course I’m back! And this time I brought my baby brother. Cas, this is Dean, one of the bartenders. Dean, meet my brother Cas. He’s a student at the university. He’ll be graduating in May with a degree in biology.”
The smile Dean already wore grew wider and his green eyes practically sparkled as he stuck a hand out in Cas’ direction.
“Hey, Cas. Nice to meet you.”
Cas reached out to shake his hand. Dean’s grip was firm and lingering just a touch longer than was normally acceptable. Cas was trying his damnest not to stare so he dropped his eyes down to his beer.
“Hello, Dean. It’s nice to meet you as well.”
Gabe, the asshat, laughed. “My brother’s a bit shy, but he can be a ton of fun once he warms up.” He nudged Cas again, laughing harder at the icy glare he got in return. Cas looked up to see Dean was still standing there. And he was watching Cas with a great deal of interest.
“So, college student, eh? Why biology?” Dean asked. School. Cas could talk about school without sounding like a complete idiot.
“I am interested in the origin of things, and in the preservation of endangered species. I actually have a double major, Gabe just keeps forgetting that. I am also majoring in botany, and minoring in entomology. I want to take part in the conservation of dying species, like bees.”
Dean listened intently, more so than Cas would have expected for a bartender, but it was appreciated.
“That’s impressive, Cas. With graduation so close, do you already have a job lined up?” He asked.
“I will be working with the university.” Cas replied.
“Told you my baby brother was smart.” Gabe said proudly.
“Yes, you did, you but forgot to mention how smart.” Dean had a twinkle to his eyes and when he looked at Cas again he smiled and winked. “I’ll be right back, I have to restock a few things.”
Once Dean was gone and Cas was able to tear his eyes away from the man’s ass as he made an exit, he looked over at his brother who was beyond amused.
“What?” He asked irritably.
“You like him.” Gabe said in a sing song voice. Cas rolled his eyes and took a gulp from his beer.
“I’ve been talking to him about you since the first night I walked in. I figured out real quick he wasn’t interested in me, but…he is into men. So I told him how hot my little brother is. At least, I think you should be hot. You are a Novak after all. The way he keeps staring at you, I think he is definitely interested in you. I feel jipped, by the way, that I didn’t get the sultry blue eyes that melt mens’ hearts.” Gabe actually pouted and Cas snorted with amusement.
“You appear to do quite well on your own.” He said.
“You’re right, I do. But it wouldn’t have hurt if I had blue eyes.” Gabe tilted his half-finished drink in his brother’s direction before taking another drink of it. Cas took another drink of his beer and unconsciously perking up when Dean reappeared carrying a stack of boxes. Ash popped up next to him and they began restocking the shelves. Cas couldn’t help but watch the way Dean moved. He was strong, he could see the muscles rippling in his arms as he moved boxes around, and the way his shirt stretched across his chest as he stacked bottles was waking up a part of Cas that had been dormant for years. Unfortunately his brother was paying much too close of attention to him.
“When’s the last time you were on date?” Gabe asked him.
“Why does it matter? It’s not like I have a lot of time with my courses.” Cas drained off the last of his beer and pushed the glass away.
“Of course it matters. You need to get laid Cassie. You need a hot piece of ass that you can pound into the bed so he can’t walk the next morning. Or you know, let him pound you into the mattress. Whatever floats your boat.” Gabe waggled his eyebrows and Cas looked up to see Dean standing there looking more than a little shocked.
“Oh my God. Just kill me now.” Cas groaned and dropped his head into his hand.
“I just came to see if you wanted another beer.”
Cas motioned with his free hand, refusing to look up at him. “Yes, I believe I need it if I’m going to continue to deal with my brother tonight.”
“Oh shut up, you love me.” Gabe finished off his drink and handed the empty glass to Dean. “Another sex on the beach, handsome. Or you know, sex on the beach.” He grinned at Dean who laughed and shook his head.
“Not happening, Gabe. I’ll give you an A for effort though.” Dean walked away and Cas finally looked up, shooting daggers at his brother.
“You’re an asshole, you know that?”
“Asshole or not, he’s totally into you. I wonder if he has any hot brothers.” Gabe mused. He chewed thoughtfully on his upper lip as he tracked Dean’s movements behind the bar. “Damn that ass…”
“Gabe!” Cas hissed, thoroughly exasperated with his brother’s antics by that point.
“What? I’m not supposed to admire beauty when I see it?” Gabe said loud enough so Dean could hear him. The bartender flashed him a wicked grin and shook his head.
“You’re too intense, Gabe. You need to chill.”
Cas snorted. “See? I’m not the only one that thinks you’re too pushy.” He poked his brother in the arm for good measure.
“I flirt because I can. I don’t get what I want as often as I want, so I double my efforts in hopes that something will give.” Gabe frowned and Cas knew he had upset him.
“And you want Dean?” Cas asked. Gabe shook his head.
“Honestly? No. I mean, he’s a good looking guy, but not really my type. I thought you might like him though.” Gabe sighed deeply and turned in his chair until he was facing his brother.
“I wasn’t blessed with your good looks. All you have to do is look at someone, man or woman, and they melt. Even if you could care less that you make the ladies’ panties drop too. That’s not the point. You just have to breathe and people are interested. That’s not the case for me. So I flirt. I get it, you’re introverted, socially awkward, shy. I think somehow God balanced us out the way we are so that we would complement one another. Where you are quiet and thoughtful, I’m loud and I speak first, think later. Where you are stunningly handsome but socially awkward, I am decent looking but have the ability to talk to anyone at any time, about anything. Why do you think I drag you places? It’s not to torture you, it’s so that you’ll meet people and experience life. So that you’ll make memories and be able to look back twenty years down the line and be like ‘Yeah, I went here, or yeah, I did that’. You can’t live with your nose stuffed in books and expect to experience life. How will you meet people? Who’s the last friend you made, Hannah? Four years ago? What about dates? You didn’t answer me before. When was your last date?”
Cas blushed and looked down at his hands which he had folded on the counter. “Um, maybe six months ago? I met him at a pizza parlor I went into with Hannah.”
“And when is the last time you got laid?” Gabe asked.
“That’s really none of your business.” Cas shot his brother a dirty look.
“I’m trying to make a point here.” Gabe pressed.
“Sophomore year. Are you happy now?” Cas grumbled.
“No, I’m not happy! That’s the problem! I got laid two nights ago. And five days before that. And last week, and six times last month. Maybe, I lost track. The point is, I’m experiencing life. I want that for you too.” Gabe reached over to squeeze his brother’s shoulder.
“I don’t want random sex, Gabe. That’s why I’m not just sleeping with anyone. I want a meaningful, committed relationship, and I don’t think that’s too much to ask for. But I need someone that understands I don’t like big crowds or noisy places. I need someone that realizes that when I’m quiet, it doesn’t mean I’m angry. Sometimes I just need time alone, or even when I’m with others, where I can be quiet and not have to talk. Someone that won’t think I’m weird or a freak, or insult me. You think I get guys because of my looks? I have news for you Gabe, guys usually get about five minutes into a conversation with me before they come to one of those conclusions. You have no idea how many times I’ve wished I could just talk to people the way you do, to strike up conversations with complete strangers, or flirt shamelessly like you do. But I can’t.” Cas looked up, startled to see Dean standing there again. He set Cas’ beer down in front of him and smiled softly.
“Sorry, you were on a roll and I didn’t want to interrupt.”
“Oh, um, thank you.” Cas curled his fingers around the glass and pulled it closer. He couldn’t help but look up shyly at the handsome bartender. Dean was still looking at him, and sill had that soft smile.
“Can I add something to this conversation of yours?” He asked. Cas nodded.
“Certainly.”
Dean put Gabe’s drink in front of him before placing his hands on the bar.
“Most guys, and I don’t know if this goes for women too or not, when they flirt the way your brother does, and honestly, I’ve flirted just as hard in the past, it’s a compensation tool. The harder he flirts, the lower his self-confidence. Your brother just opened up to you, and I can relate to most of what he said. I learned to tone down my flirting after I figured out that the in your face stuff wasn’t getting me the type of people I was really interested in.” He looked at Gabe who sighed and nodded in agreement.
“I can’t imagine you would have difficulty meeting people.” Cas said. Dean was gorgeous. The man must have dates left and right.
“Meeting people? Look at my line of work. Meeting people isn’t my problem. It’s meeting the type of people I’m actually interested in, that is the issue. If you think I’m interested in frat boys and drunk girls, you’re sorely mistaken.” Dean grabbed a rag and wiped up a spot of beer that had pooled near Cas’ glass.
“So pray tell, cause I know Cassie here is too chicken to ask. What kind of people are you interested in?” Gabe asked him. Dean smiled shyly, glancing at Cas before he looked at Gabe.
“I like intelligence, but I don’t like being talked down to. I didn’t go to college, couldn’t afford it when I’m still paying my brother’s way through, but that doesn’t mean I’m not smart too. I can hold my own in a conversation about anything, from politics to global warming to recipes for melt in your mouth fried chicken, and anything in between. I prefer quiet, thoughtful people to loud and crass. Sorry, Gabe.” Dean grinned and Gabe just shrugged.
“I figured out the first night I met you that I was too hot for you to handle.” Gabe teased. Dean laughed and shook his head.
“Ok, you just keep telling yourself that.” He glanced over at Cas again, the laughter fading back into a shy, almost nervous smile. “I gave up on the idea of casual sex a long time ago. It’s not fulfilling emotionally, and I’m old enough now that I want substance, someone that I can wake up to every morning, maybe for the rest of my life, and know that they love me, and I love them. Lord knows I have my flaws, but I need someone that can overlook them and still want me.”
Cas stared at Dean the entire time he was talking, unable to tear his eyes away or to stop listening. The bartender had just poured his entire heart out to them, leaving himself open and vulnerable. Cas knew exactly how Dean felt.
“I know exactly what you mean. That was what I wasn’t able to articulate earlier to my brother as to why I am not sleeping with just anyone. I don’t want just anyone. And we all have our flaws. I’ve been told on many occasions that I’m socially stunted because I don’t find it easy to strike up conversations, especially just random conversations, like about the weather or social events. Being told this over and over and over again my entire life has made me not want to socialize. It’s hard, it’s usually uncomfortable, but I try in spite, because I do want friends, and I do want to fit in. But I usually don’t. My brother’s the only one to ever see how weird I am and still accept me as I am. He’s…my best friend.” Cas finally tore his eyes away from Dean to look at Gabe. His brother was staring at him, his amber eyes wide with shock.
“I am?”
“Duh.” Cas smirked.
Gabe swallowed hard and looked down at his drink in silence for a long time before he spoke again. “I never thought you were weird, Cassie. I always thought you were smart and funny and your sarcasm level is like, through the roof. But never, not once did I think you were weird.”
Cas smiled and nudged his brother. “Thank you for that.”
“I don’t think you’re weird either, for what it matters. You want weird? Try having a conversation with Ash. Dude is a conspiracy theorist to the nth degree. He’ll make you paranoid. But you? Nah, you’re not weird at all.” Dean said. The smile he gave was warm and dazzling, and Cas found himself smiling back.
“Would you like to go out sometime?” Cas asked. Two seconds later he realized what he had just asked and his blue eyes widened to epic proportions. He blinked, his mouth falling open in shock. Dean chuckled.
“You don’t ask people out very often, do you?”
Cas’ face was burning as he shook his head, biting down on his lower lip as he dropped his gaze to his beer. “T-that’s the first time.”
“Wow, I’m honored. And yeah, I’d love to. In fact…” Dean checked his watch. “I get off in ten minutes. Care to grab a beer with me?”
Cas looked up at him, his lip slipping out from between his teeth as he smiled. “I’d love to.” Dean smiled wider and nodded.
“I have a few more customers to top off and then I’ll be back.”
He walked away leaving the Novak brothers to one another.
“Holy shit, Cassie! I can’t believe you did that!” Gabe laughed.
“I can’t either! I don’t ask men out, it’s scary!”
Gabe shook his head as he sipped at his drink. “My little Cassie, all grown up, and with a hot date. I envy you, little brother. So you like Dean, huh?”
Cas ran his thumb over the condensation on his glass as he slowly nodded. “Yes, I do. He’s nice and I find him intriguing. It doesn’t hurt that he’s gorgeous either.”
“Yeah, he is pretty interesting. I hope it works out since you guys seem to want the same things out of life.” Gabe said. Dean came out from the back, nodding to Cas and holding up a finger to let him know he’d be there in a moment. Cas stood up and looked at his brother.
“Since you were going on an information overload earlier, here’s one for you. I’m a top.”
Cas left his brother sitting there gaping as he left to join Dean and find a booth in a corner where they could be alone.
“I knew it!” Gabe pumped his fist in the air. Dean didn’t know what he was in for!