Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

I am not the best writer, but I am on an adrenaline high and experiencing a time in my life where this is a good coping mechanism...

ANYWAYS.

Home For the Holidays includes Characters:
Zen Fukuu
Kousei Fukuu, Ultimate Pilot(Mine)
Sora Kobayashi, Ultimate Phycologist (Snowytails)
Dae Yeong, Ultimate Composer(-Tsuki)
Mei Fukuu
Ito Fukuu(Mentioned)

It includes ships such as:
Kousei x Dae(Fukyeo)
Zen x Mei(Kousei's parents)
Kousei x Sora( Plot Reasons )

Now for the ACTUAL TRIGGER WARNINGS!!

And Themes such as:
CHILD NEGLECT
UNHEALTHY OBSESSIONS
ROMANTIC OBSESSION
MURDER(implied dismemberment)
MENTIONS OF MENTAL HOSPITALS
MENTIONS OF PILLS
UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP(ironically not Fukyeo)
And SLIGHT HOMOPHOBIA(or Heteronormativity, IDC)

Also a very UNRELIABLE NARRATOR

Please read at your own discretion.

Chapter Text

CHAPTER SPECIFIC TW: SUGGESTIVE CONTENT

"And so, that's what happened." Mei finished, closing her laptop with a nervous smile. She looked to Zen with a look he knew full well, begging for a response.

Zen gulped down his anxiety on the antique couch that belonged to his mother, and made the comment.
"I'm," think through your words, "I'm worried about him. To have a kid show up like that, on hopes peak school grounds no less."

She shook her head, closing her eyes and fiddling with her glasses. "I know, but I'm sure he is going to be alright. The police will catch the killer in no time."

She went on, picking up her hot chocolate from the coffee table near them, "I'm sure the authorities will be done with this case before Kousei even gets back to school." She paused as Zen remembered the full document she had read. "He knows you're here right?"

Zen laughed, the back of his neck turning red as he pulled at the hairs back there, "I wanted to surprise him!"

"You forgot didn't you?" Zen sensed a slight laugh under that smile, under the shine of her glasses. He never remembered to do these kinds of things, taking a rest or driving his coworkers home from the bar instead.

Zen knew it was best to give up, his water getting too warm in his hands. "Yeah, but let's be honest, he loves surprises!"

Zen knew his son, Kousei was a lot like himself. Working overtime for the job he loved, a fun loving kid, even if he wished Kousei wasn't so hard on himself.

Mei laughed, "and I'm sure you're gonna love his."

"What does that mean?" Zen set down the drink, his hands damp from the water. "Love, what does that mean?"

Zen had been given a knowing smile, shaking his head, "oh, he has a surprise for you alright." Her words slurred, "and maybe I have a few for you, my prince~"

Oh god, he knew what this meant. Mei loved that nickname, he was 'her Prince' for lack of a better term. A man who married into a family of royals, and now was one himself. A man who left the chains of his own family or life behind.

"Alright, alright, we can get up to that later," he laughed off her suggestions, loving the attention but needed space to breathe. He stood up walking across the room near the Christmas tree, Ito and Mei hadn't found the time to take it apart. "You really had to go all out with the Christmas decorations this year?"

Mei smiled, "I know you like it so simple, but I couldn't help but go all out this year!"

KNOCK

KNOCK

"Kousei, do you not have a door bell?" Said the voice of a girl Zen couldn't recognize.

Now the voice of his son rang through the door, "oh right!" The door bell rang.

"Mhm, you're a dork sei." Said another boy, with a raspy voice.

Mei got off the arm chair, gleaming with hidden laughter towards her husband. "That must be them!"

Opening the door revealed 3 kids, all the same age and dressed for the weather. One, his son and the other two he hadn't recognized.

"Look who's home! How was your trip to the café?"

A boy with grayish purple hair looked back, "yeah, it was good."

The girl was still sipping on a cup of boba tea as she nodded. Her cheeks were red from the cold and darker in the ornament that reflected her...
A girl.

Oh.

Okay.

Zen nodded, he could deal with this. He half wished Kousei wouldn't talked with him about those birds and bees, or the nativity senses around the neighborhood.

Kousei set some bags on the floor, "we brought some treats for you and Ito from the store, though I hope you don't mind if we ate a few." He lets put a breathy giggle, a mirror of his mother's.

"More like you ate them," the guy laughed, fixing the hair that had fallen under his large headphones. Must be a good friend of Kousei's, though he seems a bit lazy in the way he held himself, like a Christmas gift from a toddler.

The girl giggled, "no, I had some too."

A cue.

"Well I hope you saved some for me," he said, a grin starting to form on his face.

All eyes on him.

"DAD!" Without a second thought, Kousei bolted over to him almost tackling zen on the spot. His father had barely even prepared for impact, "Holy Shit, I didn't think you were gonna show up this year!" He sounded ecstatic.

"Woah, woah, language, Kiddo." He rocked the kid, noticing how tall Kousei was, "Mother of Pearl you've grown a lot! How has it been?"

"Sorry," he cut himself off for the language, "oh it's been great! My classmates are the best, I've met so many new people and- OH RIGHT!" He cut himself off.

Zen felt his own son drag him into the girl and his friend, "These are my friends! Guys this is my dad."

I gave them a smile, "it's nice to meet you two." He half wanted to lie and say he remembered what Kousei had said about them but he barely remembered those calls. It would be easy to catch Zen too.

"Sora, Dad. Dad, Sora!" Kousei gestured to the girl with darker skin and brown hair in a neat bun.

Sora smiled, holding out her hand to be shaken, "it's nice to meet you too, Kousei has told us a lot about you Mr."

"Please call me Zen!" He took her hand, shaking it firmly.

Kousei's smile her a bit brighter, "and this is Dae." The guy head was covered with a black beanie with cat ears, and his eyes glistened with a calmly smile.

"Hi," Dae wasn't a talker, he had just watched all of this with that smile, only leaving Kousei's side when his son left it.

A feeling of déjà vu crept up Zen's back.

"I'm sure you two and Kousei are good friends!" This is fine.

Mei smiled, her voice soft, "they wouldn't be over if they weren't."

Zen couldn't tell if the fact that Mei trusted them was a good or bad sign.

"Well, I hope you two have made your selves at home."

Sora smiled, "yeah, your guest bedroom is really nice."

Another cue.

Zen chuckles with an ignorant smile, "shouldn't you be sleeping with Kousei?"

"I am," Dae spoke, glancing at Zen's son and back. He could understand that, Boys sleep with boys, they must not be dating yet.

Mei's glasses glissaded, "I'll take these to the fridge."

"Mhm...I'll help," Dae mumbled.

"Thank you, but I got this," Mei, took the white paper bag off the ground with loud cracks in its edges. "You remind me a lot of when I was younger."

Dae's cheeks flushed an unnoticeable red, "'ve been told."

In the corner of his eye Zen saw his son smirk as he and Sora sat down on the couch.

Kousei wouldn't make the same mistake he did. His son was a good kid..

Dae passed Zen as he watched the boy sit next to Kousei. Taking his arm against Kousei's own and listening in on their conversation, muttering a small "mhm," at Kousei's words that Zen could only hope were kind rejections.

A talk with Dae later would probably help, he had no reason to fear his son's friend after all.

Chapter Text

Zen peered inside his son's room, careful not to be seen. It was an act of paranoia he often didn't have, yet his son was too innocent to risk it.

Kousei was playing with Dae's hair going on and on about nothing in a way he hadn't seen his son before. Remarkably calm, giggly, yet bright.

Those two had shared looks the whole night, through dinner, and the talk when they first got home. Calm looks that made the other smile, possibly an inside joke he'd just never get.

Zen thought back on that.

Sora seemed so nice compared to Dae, and Kousei had clearly cared about her enough to get her a new pair of glasses. She was a sweet girl, he could tell that! Even if she insisted on Kousei taking a higher antidepressant dose than necessary.

Dae just felt off.

Maybe it was what Mei had said, 'you remind me of myself' or something. Yet, Zen knew his own paranoia. Kousei avoided the house for a reason so like, he wasn't stupid. He just needed a nice, relaxing, one on one conversation with Dae to clear his mind.

He knocked on the door.

"Who is it?" Kousei called.

Zen welcomed himself in, "it's me."

Kousei gasped in excitement, "hey dad! Me and Dae were just talking about you!"

"Really," he laughed off the praise. "Well, actually I came to talk with your friend here."

Dae perked up, all eyes on Zen now.

"Huh, why?" Kousei looked almost disappointed.

Zen laughed, "I just wanna get to know your friends a bit more, sorry Kiddo."

Kousei giggled, looking at the floor with longing, "it's fine, as long as Dae's okay with it."

They looked at eachother and back again, like a version of his own wife looking at him. He wanted to fly away to ignore the chains of his son merely being friends with him but he knew, deep down he didn't need to. That's what Zen told himself in the brief moment, Kousei wasn't gonna get hurt.

"m'okay," the soft mutter echoed the room.

"Great, you like hot coco right?" Zen led Dae out of the room, following behind the composer.

He shrugged, "m'yeah."

"Okay, good enough even!" He was certainly nervous.

Walking into the kitchen the two men made their way to the cabinet, reaching for the instant stuff. They shared a look as Dae grabbed it first.

"So you like the rich stuff?" Zen said, turning on the lights. Wait for a cue.

Dae Shrugged, "it doesn't really matter, it's hot chocolate."

"Fair, I just like mine with extra marshmallows!" Zen shook a packet of the small ones, as they seeped through a crack in the wrapping. "Fiddle sticks."

Dae set the water pot down by the sink. He had gotten the thing out as Zen had made the mess. The composer rolled his eyes as he helped Zen clean up that mess of white fluff.

"Sorry about that," he laughed. Kousei never referred to Dae with a nickname, though it would be hard to come up with one.

Dae nodded "t's fine."

Pause.

No cue.

Dae's eyes analyzed Zen with an uncharacteristic glare. Avoid that topic, Kousei wouldn't befriend a killer.

"So..." think of something- "Kousei and Sora, how are they getting along?"

Dae caught how off topic that was, "they're doing fine really. Kousei tried to help here were he can."

"Yeah," Zen moved to grab his own packet, "he likes her a lot, I can tell."

"I guess," The gas turned on with a click, "Sei's practically adopted her."

"Adopted?" Zen was taken a back by the word.

Dae paused, "she doesn't have the best family, but I've seen the look in his eye." Another click lighted the stove ablaze, "Sei knows her siblings by heart."

"Maybe it's a little more than adoption," maybe Zen could play with matches.

Dae looked at him like a purple Christmas tree, "mhm?" No words came out.

"I mean you don't just bring a girl home for no reason." Zen was absolutely about to play with matches.

Unfortunately those 'matches' made Dae look at him with the confusion of a purple Christmas tree.

"I'd expect Kou to distrust a lot of people after what happened last week, so the fact that she's here tells me a lot."

"Are you serious?" A breathy giggle left Dae's nose as he said it.

"What do you mean?"

Dae's look was still the same as he waited for the water to boil. "Sei's gay."

"Oh, I almost forgot about that." That makes this conversation so much worse. "We don't really talk a lot so I must've forgot, but that's fine with me!"

"t's okay," Dae's eyes lost their contact with Zen. If it wasn't for those words Zen's defensives would've gotten louder, no one should know he forgot that detail.

Pause.

No cue.

This is fine! This is really fine! Zen noted that Dae simply didn't talk a lot, but neither did Mei. This is FINE!

No reason to distrust the guy though! He seems pretty good, for a quiet kid at least. Zen could see how Kousei liked him, not romantically! Okay, maybe romantically, he'd need to know Dae a lot more before considering that.

"Why are you talking to me?" Dae fiddled with the edges of the stove.

"Excuse me?"

"Why?"

Zen paused and with no set reason than his gut to distrust Dae he started talking. "I'm just a little worried about Kousei. A kid doesn't end up like that on those types of grounds unless that killer's a professional."

"Mhm.." Dae trailed off, waiting for more.

"Nobody deserves to go out like that, it sickens me that they even got on campus."

Dae muttered small words after the comment, "they did."

"What?" Zen caught on.

Dae's gaze was sharp, and with nothing else to stare at in the kitchen light it lingered like a stab wound. "That guy was a cunt."

Zen tried to object but words lodged in his throat.

"I won't hurt Sei, promise."

"So you're the person behind that kids murder." Zen stepped back. The foam of coco water hybrid bubbled over, the steam becoming audible.

Not a cue, but Zen stepped out of line.

"What the hell is wrong with you?!" His voice raised, slightly quiet not to alert the house.

Dae glanced over to the boiling water, tearing a packet and dropping the powder in. "What?" He turned down the heat but the bubbles still popped over and over and over again,

"How dare you show up in my house?"

"Kousei invited me," Dae wasn't affected by the glare or the volume of Zen's voice, "I couldn't hurt him like that anyway."

"Get away from my son."

"You barely know him," The words slid out, a cathartic smile forming at Dae's lips. "He's mine, and I'm not gonna break his heart knowing he feels the same."

Cue

Cue

Cue

Cue

"He doesn't belong to you."

Not again, not again, not Kousei.

Alarm bells rang in Zen's head and he took Dae by the collar, "If you hurt him, I will come down there and kill you myself. You hear me?"

The yelling rang in both sets of ears.

Dae wasn't threatened.

Dae just started laughing, giggling, as his hands started to twitch. Bubbling laughter edged at his throat, barely audible by the heavy breathing.

Manic.

That as the fucking word.

Dae pushed his hair away from his eyes, bubbling with a deranged smile on his face, a smile of a killer. Zen wanted to run, but he wanted to stay, he wanted to explain everything, and he wanted to leave.

Zen fought the urge to grab a knife and stab this manic to death for a moment.

"Do you want to die?"

No, "if it means Kousei is safe from a murderer like you."

The laugher grew louder.

"You don't really know him."

The insult nearly drowned out. The silence filled with laughter and the bubbles of hot chocolate. Broken words were uttered in mere seconds.

"Kousei's not as innocent as he looks."

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

"What?"

Chapter Text

Chapter specific TW: mentions of Laxitives

"What?"

Zen looked at Dae letting go of his collar, the hot chocolate still bubbling over. "Kousei isn't innocent here."

"What the heck does that mean?" He watched Dae's every movement, every twich, every bubble of laughter.

What Dae was insinuating lingered in the kitchen, however it was a lie. It had to be, Kousei wasn't a murderer.

"Yeong was does that mean." Keep it up.

Dea let out a small laugh, "They were entitled to a spot in the main course."

"What?" Zen didn't understand.

"The kid." Dae started mumbling, "they thought they deserved the main course."

The victim was a reserve course student. One of the top students for that matter. Zen has to pay attention to every Mei says or risk... never mind. He'd just know that by heart.

"Ever heard of Natsumi Kuzuryu?"

Of course he did, Mei read him the article like she had done just hours before. A girl who was murdered for bullying a main course student, believing she didn't deserve her spot there...

"Kousei knows better than anyone that he deserved that spot in the main course."

Grabbing a cup, he poured the liquid slowly. "Not everyone does."

"He wouldn't kill over that, you're not tricking me."

Dae smiled. "Never said he was the victim," the mutter echoed through the house, "it takes a while to compose."

"What?"

"I don't even have a band," Dae poured another glass. The brown liquid would've tasted like shit. "It easy to think I'm a good target."

"Kousei wouldn't hack somebody's head off for that!" He spat, the words filling up his mouth, "especially not for someone like you."

Dae paused, taking it in. He looked insulted to a small degree. "can I change the subject."

It wasn't a question.
Zen knew these types of looks, one not at him, but ones that would burn.

Zen took his drink before he can think twice, or Dae can fill it up with laxatives.

"Your son is everything to me." He didn't dare bring the cup up to his lips. "We just clicked."

"The heck does that have to do with anything?" Back down, back down, back down!

"Because I've seen him at his lowest." He didn't paused, walking on his own accord. "He wants to be like you, exactly what he see you as."

Zen took the pause, "I'm his father of course he does."

"Yet, he can't," Dae gave him a knowing look.

...

The first call from the mental hospital was reason to panic enough.

The second call sent him home no matter how much he didn't want to stay.

...
...
...

"He knows I'm not perfect."

"Does he?" Dae looked at him, without a look of mischief or malice in his eyes. That wouldn't have been scary. No, Dae gave him a blank stare, straight into his soul.

Zen took a step back.

He breathed, "you forgot to tell him you were here, you don't come for parent-teacher days, you forgot he's gay," Dae listed off things from that night alone.

You can't describe something you don't know.

You can make things up with hope.

"Sei did his best, you know."

Back to the topic.

"Somethings just can't be fixed."

"What the fuck did you do to my son."

'My'

God he hated when anyone used that word. Yet now, he's doing it himself. It was for Kousei.

Dae laughed, "I didn't do anything."

That smile came back.

"Kousei is my everything," each word rang aloud, "I don't know what I'd do without him."

He knew those words.

He knew those words.

Zen knew those fucking words.

"Are you going to drink your hot chocolate?"

"Get away from my son."
There it is again.

Dae smirked, teeth showing in the shitty kitchen light, "no."

"Did you not hear me?" Zen was far taller, bigger than the stick like excuse of a boy below him.

Dae's gaze didn't falter, a blank stare right into the hole of Zen's soul. "Kousei wouldn't want that."

"Because you put those ideas in his head."

"I didn't expect him to kill."

"He didn't," Zen had no defenses but neither could Dae.

With a swift drink of the chocolate, and the deranged look in his eyes, the laughter started up again. "How would you know?"

"I-" caught in the corner, he had no where to run. Just rely on hope. Kousei would never. "I know my son."

"Do you?" Dae recognized the circle they had just ran. God it was pathetic. "Do you really know how amazing of a he really is?"

Zen said nothing.

"He's interesting and funny, and," he trailed off. Keeping all the bubbles inside his throat, threatening to tear his throat out as his stare broke, "I've never met someone more perfect."

Obsessed.

Dae wasn't a talker but he was obsessed.

Zen knew this.

God he knew this.

Fuck he knew this.

Dae won.

Dae won before he even stepped foot in this prison.

Dae won before Kousei even dragged an axe to the kids head.

Dae won the moment those two fucking met.

Zen goes silent.

Dae keeps himself from choking on the hot chocolate as Zen's grew cold. It was rich, the good instant kind.

The type where you only wanted more after you've finished it.

"Okay," words stumbled out of Zen's mouth. "Don't hurt him, I swear if you even think about it," the words were quiet, even if they were a threat they were defeated.

The chuckle left Dae's throat, with tears of laughter in his eyes. "I would never." That was a promise.

"I'll take you back to Kousei's room."

Dae nodded, gripping his coffee cup to take with him. Zen didn't even bother to object as he left the other Dae had poured on the table.

He wasn't about to touch that.

Opening the door himself, Dae led the way inside. The lamp light illuminating the room.

"You're back!" Kousei looked up from his phone, wearing a bright yet sleepy smile. "I wasn't expecting you two to take that long."

"Mhm..." Dae shrugged, smiling softly at the boy.

Zen laughed through his nerves, swallowing down the feeling in his gut. "Yeah, listen, I'm sorry I can't stay for long Kousei. I got a job to do."

"It's fine," it wasn't, Kousei wanted him to stay. "It was nice seeing you tonight dad!"

"It was," Zen smiled before he could process any of that.

Kousei had buried his head in Zen's Chest, inching in for a hug 'goodbye'. Kousei's fingers gripped at their edges as Zen strained to see his son's face, hugging him back.

"I really missed you!" Kousei let go, with Dae peering behind his shoulder. "Maybe you could call me sometime."

Zen gave him a big grin, "Maybe." Knowing himself, Zen doubted he'd make the time. "Now get some sleep, I'm sure you have something big planned tomorrow."

"Mhm, The light show." The soft voice echoed the room.

Kousei peeked up, "I almost forgot we were doing that!" The genuine excitement in Kousei's voice pained his father.

"Well, I'll let you get to that kiddo," he rubbed the top of Kousei's head. "Night bud."

"Goodnight dad." Kousei watched as Zen closed the door on them.

Stay out of the prison and keep your shackles, then everything will be fine.

"He doesn't like me," the mumble echoed from inside the door.

Kousei seemed to have been taken a back, "nonsense, he likes everybody! Maybe you two got into a little disagreement but nothing a few more talks won't make up!"

"Maybe..." Dae trailed off.

"What was that about by the way?" Genuine question, innocent question.

Dae paused, "remember what happened last week?"

"Oh!" Kousei laughed, the mere inflection being uncharacteristically nervous, "I don't think we'll need to worry about that ever again, Dae."

"I guess," Zen heard the cup clink on the nearby dresser.

A pause between them, Zen couldn't tell what made him more nervous. The silence or his son. He felt the blood on Kousei's hands edge into his own back.

"Could we go to sleep now?" The mutter was barely audible.

Zen could sense the smile on Dae's face, "course."

"Night dear." The sound of moving sheets echoed in the hall, as the click of the lamp was heard and the light of the kitchen was the only thing left on in the house.

Zen wasn't sure to turn it off or not.

Zen didn't know where he was standing anymore. Doing nothing left this place to change, more blood had rang the walls.

He walked out to his car and collapsed on his seat. Turning on the heat and falling asleep. Not in the house. Not in that house.