Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Wakko slumped up in his bed, his eyes opened slightly. His bedroom was pitch black, so he assumed that it was still the middle of the night. Yakko and Dot were probably still fast asleep. He was the only Warner awake right now. 

Suddenly, he heard his stomach growl. Wakko rubbed his hands on his belly, feeling it gurgle inside. With an exasperated yawn, he heaved himself out of bed and onto his feet. He trudged out of his bedroom and navigated his way down the hall and into the kitchen. There, Wakko started to rummage through the cabinets for some food that would hopefully satisfy his sprawling hunger. 

Searching with groggy eyes, Wakko spotted a box of corn flakes in the pantry cabinet. He reached for the cereal and pulled it off the shelf. His eyes glittered at the box as he opened the top flap, growing hungrier by the second. Tilting his head back, Wakko poured the contents of the box into his mouth. Wakko's tastebuds fluttered as the sugary cereal flowed down his throat and into his stomach. 

Soon enough, Wakko had devoured the entire box of corn flakes, leaving not a single flake of cereal behind. He licked his lips happily. That was delicious, he thought, yet I still feel rather hungry. 

Yearning for more nourishment, Wakko opened the refrigerator and pulled out a carton of chocolate milk. He pulled apart the tab and started to drink. Wakko closed his eyes and grinned. His taste buds were thrilled by the ice cold, delightfully creamy beverage. The milk went perfectly with the corn flakes he had eaten just prior. He could feel the cereal melting into the chocolatey substance. His stomach was doing backflips as it was being treated with scrumptious goodness. 

Before he knew it, Wakko had emptied the entire carton. Surprised, he poked his eye through the open tab, seeing that there wasn't a single drop of chocolate milk left in the container. 

Wakko patted his hand against his tummy. He felt much better after putting a little bit of food in his system. He could already feel the milk and cereal digesting in his stomach. 

But he still felt hungry inside.  

Craving something savory after injecting a pound of sweetness into his mouth, Wakko searched through the cabinet once more and stumbled upon a sack of peanuts. He remembered getting the peanuts when he and his sibling's visited the circus a few weeks back. Yakko had gotten a jumbo bag for them to share while they watched the show. By nature, Wakko had ended up eating most of the peanuts on top of everything else he ate while he was there. He loved them so much that he convinced his big brother to buy him a second full-sized bag that he could eat once they got home. 

Yet, after all this time, Wakko still hasn't gotten around to eating all those peanuts.

A bag of crunchy peanuts sounded appetizing to the sleep deprived Wakko. He climbed up onto the counter and hoisted the sack of peanuts down from the shelf. Wakko untied the knot that sealed the bag and created a large opening. He extended his jaw out and started to pour the peanuts into his gaping mouth. His eyes watched delightfully as a barrage of peanuts fell onto his tongue and rolled down his throat. 

Just as he had started to find satisfaction in eating his crunchy snack, Wakko had already guzzled down the whole bag. He tipped the bag over, the last remaining crumbs falling onto the floor. Not wanting anything to go to waist, Wakko scooped up the crumbs and shoved them into his mouth. 

Wakko rubbed his belly, a loud belch sneaked through his throat. Of all the foods that he ate, peanuts was a food that he couldn't get enough of. 

"I wonder if we have any peanut butter.." he said out loud. He licked his lips, tummy rumbled at the thought. "Mmm, I like peanut butter." 

As he reached his arm for the cabinet, his nose caught a whiff of an unpleasant odor. Wakko covered his nose. The smell was too much to bear. It was a good thing that neither of his siblings were awake right now. His sister would make jabs at him for sure. 

Oh my god, Wakko! What did you eat!? 

I dunno. A few corn dogs and a couple of pb&js. 

Ugh! You stink! 

What? Everybody passes gas, sis. Can't you cut me some slack? 

By sheer curiosity, Wakko reached his head over his shoulder and sniffed his butt. There was a faint foul smell aroding from his behind, what smelled like a combination of blue cheese and bean burritos. Surprisingly, the foul smell was not the smell of a fart; it was something else entirely. 

Curious still, Wakko started to sniff the premises. Luckily for him, he had a stellar sense of smell. He was able to track down his smelly socks from a mile away. It made tracking down his dirty laundry a heck of a lot easier. 

After a short while of searching, he managed to sniff out the source of the smell. It was a metal hatch bolted down to the floor. Wakko has seen the hatch many times before, and it wasn't anything new to him. His big brother had warned him several times in the past never to open the hatch. 

But Yakko wasn't awake right now, so he might as well take advantage of that. 

Wakko bent over and pulled on the metallic handle. With a great amount of strength, and an equal amount of sweat, the toon managed to lift up the hatch and open the cellar door. Great big fumes seeped up from the hole and into Wakko's nose. He put his hand over his nose; the smell was unbearable. But curiosity was eating at him. He had to find out what was inside the cellar. 

Taking in a good amount of air beforehand, Wakko held his breath as he stuck his head inside the hole in the floor. The cellar was pitch black. The toon couldn't see a thing. He could hear what sounded like water flowing, creating tiny ripples in the stream. That was when it clicked in his mind: this was a water tank. 

"Hmm, so this is where the water in the water tower is," Wakko said out loud as he continued to gaze into the darkness.

Wakko pulled an empty cup out of his hammerspace and stuck his arm into the tank. He scooped up a good amount of water and drank some of it. The water tasted ice cold. Despite the horrible smell of the water tank, the water itself tasted fine to him. He quickly gulped down the rest of the water and threw the cup back in his hammerspace. 

Perhaps it was a fart after all, he figured, shutting the hatch again. 

Suddenly, Wakko felt his stomach begin to gurgle inside. He poked his finger at his soft belly. He could feel his stomach toss and turn inside him, moaning and groaning. His stomach was acting rather funny right now. 

"Yeesh. I knew you were hungry, but give me a break," he told his tummy. He patted his muffin top, as his stomach continued to gurgle louder. 

Desperate to ease his tummy's groaning, Wakko opened the cabinet above the sink and grabbed a jumbo sized jar of peanut butter. Popping the lid open, he held the jar over his gaping mouth. He shook the jar slightly, a huge blob of peanut butter slithered out of the jar and plopped into his mouth. Wakko licked his mouth clean of the savery spread, having devoured the whole jar. 

Just for safe measures, Wakko pulled out a jar of strawberry jam to go with the peanut butter he just ate. Then he snagged a bag of popcorn and guzzled down all its contents. A can of pinto beans? Wakko snatched that and poured every last bean into his mouth. He also found a can of white beans, black beans and green beans, and proceeded to devour those too. Craving something sweet, Wakko ate up a box of mini muffins, followed by a box of cinnamon rolls. 

Wakko rubbed his belly, letting out another loud belch. After stuffing his face with a quarter of the food that was in their pantry, Wakko’s angry stomach finally felt full. 

Still feeling a tad bit thirsty, Wakko retracted his empty glass from his hammerspace and filled it to the brim with water. He proceeded to chug the water, refilling it two more times to ensure that his thirst had been properly quenched. Finally, he threw the cup back into his hammerspace. He patted his belly again, feeling more full than ever. His tummy was bulging out quite a bit, but it wasn’t too out of the ordinary considering all the food he ate. Satisfied, he began to waddle back to his bedroom and go back to sleep. 

Chapter Text

Animaniacs sg.87  Drafted 2/22/94

*Camera pans in on Yakko sitting on the couch, holding a TV remote and flipping through channels* 

Dot: AHHHHHH!! YAKKOOOOO!! 

*the Warner sister runs into the room screaming while flailing her arms*

Yakko: Dot! What’s wrong! What’s all the screaming about!? 

*Yakko leaps off the couch, bending down and placing a hand on her shoulder* 

Dot: Th-th-there’s a..s-spider in my room! 

Yakko: A spider!? 

Dot: Uh-huh! A big, black, ugly, hairy, disgusting spider! 

Yakko: *Whispers to the audience* Sounds like your typical Hollywood actress after having a one night stand with an actor for a horror movie. (LINE WILL BE ALTERED DURING REVISIONS) 

Dot: This is serious, Yakko! I don’t want a spider in my room! You have to get rid of it! *Dot frantically grabs onto Yakko’s slacks* I’m not going in my room alone! 

Yakko: Have no fear, sister sib! Yakko the spider catcher has come to your rescue! 

*Yakko pulls an oversized net out of his hammerspace. He points to his tool*

Yakko: This baby has been catching the creepiest of creepy crawlies since 1933. *Yakko proceeds to kiss his net* But of course, a good spider catcher needs a catching companion, and that’s you. 

Dot: What!? Why me!? 

Yakko: This spider is the most menacing of its kind! It cannot be defeated alone! We must tackle this beast together if we ever have the chance of ending its vicious wrath! Now, onward we go! *Yakko starts marching forward triumphantly* 

Dot: *gulps* Good luck, Sir Yaksalot. *She reluctantly follows her brother* 

*Yakko and Dot are seen tiptoeing down the hall. The latter is clinging onto her brother for comfort. They stop right outside Dot’s bedroom* 

Yakko: Alright, sis. This is it. In t-minus-ten seconds, I’m gonna jump in there and catch the spider by surprise. If all else fails – *Yakko pulls out another, equal sized net from his hammerspace and hands it to Dot* – I can call up my backup. 

Dot: But Yakko..

Yakko: But what? 

Dot: Yakko I- C-cant do this. 

Yakko: Nonsense, Dot. You’re a natural. I know this spider is ugly and scary, but you can’t let that get to your head. You can do anything if you put your mind to it. Just believe in yourself. 

Dot: Enough with that cheesy monologue, Yakko! Let’s just catch this spider and get this over with! 

Yakko: *sighs* You’re right, sis. I should save that line for when we do our smoking PSA. 

*Camera shows aerial shot of Dot’s bedroom, Yakko peering through the open doorway. A black blur runs across the screen *insert dramatic sound cue** 

Yakko: Now Dot, if I don’t make it out alive, tell my little chickens that I love them very much. 

Dot: Yakko, we don’t have chickens. 

Yakko: *facepalms* My magazines, Dot! The chicks in my magazines! 

Dot: oh. For a second, I thought you meant- w-wait, what!?

*Yakko takes a giant leap into Dot’s bedroom. He is tackled by a black blur, and the two engage in a scuffle. Dot watches on nervously. The fight ends with Yakko throwing his net over the black blur* 

Yakko: GOTCHA! I’ve got you know sp- Wakko? 

*The black blur becomes more visible, and is revealed to be Wakko wearing a spider costume. 

Wakko: Hiya, big brother! Whatcha think of my Halloween costume? 

Yakko: Well that sure was anticlimactic *Yakko gives his sister a disapproving look* 

Dot: Sorry. I-I just saw him, and I..I-I was just so appalled. 

Wakko: What? I’m not that ugly! 

Yakko: *releases his net from Wakko’s head* You sure gave me and Dot a scare, Wakko. That costume of yours is so frightening that people might pull out the bottle of Raid on you. 

Wakko: You think Raid would make me smell nice? 

Dot: *facepalms* It’s bugspray, idiot. 

Wakko: Oh. So I’d smell like Spiderman, right? 

Dot: Sure, because that’s definitely how that works. 

Yakko: Now, Dot *he places a warm hand on her shoulder* I know this must be really embarrassing for you, making a fuss over nothing. But know that I am still very proud of you for being so brave. 

Dot: Well, thanks, I guess? I mean, you’re definitely right about the embarrassing part. My cheeks hadn’t been redder since I first laid eyes on George Clooney. 

*A loud rumble fills the room. Wakko rubs his hands against his stomach* 

Wakko: Man! Pretending to be a spider really works up an appetite! What do you think spiders eat, Yakko?

Yakko: Only the sweetest, most chocolatey, sugar drenched candy you can imagine. There’s some Snickers bars in the cabinet if ya want some. 

Wakko: Oh, boy! *Wakko gallops out of the room on all fours, showing off his extra set of legs attached to the spider costume. 

Dot: *whispers to Yakko* I hope this doesn't become a phase. 

Chapter Text

Slappy stepped outside into the backyard of her cozy tree home. She took in a deep breath, feeling the fresh spring air fill her lungs. She tightened the knot of the purple apron she was wearing, and adjusted her bright yellow sunhat. She walked gently through the yard, feeling the morning dew of the grass between her toes. 

The old squirrel approached a bed of flowers, perched against the white picket fence that sheltered her backyard from any hooligans that wanted to try and mess with her babies. She had been working hard to ensure that her flowers looked nice, and she intended to keep it that way. 

She took in another deep breath, smelling her gorgeous bed of tulips. 

“Ah,” she sighed, a warm smile gracing her face. “Good morning, tulips. You want some water?” 

Slappy knew her tulips couldn’t talk; she wasn’t going to pretend that they could. But she could tell that her tulips needed watering by how their stems were bent, and how the petals of each flower wilted ever so slightly. The squirrel was famous for her precise attention to detail – a very strong attribute of hers known to many. 

She dug into her hammerspace and pulled out her signature watering can. It was an orange watering can with an image of a daisy plastered on the side. Slappy went over to the hose and filled it up with water. Then she returned to her tulips and proceeded to water them. Immediately, her tulip’s stems perched up, and their petals stood up higher. This caused Slappy to smile, seeing her tulips healthy and in bloom. 

Slappy wasn’t particularly known for being gentle and soft spoken. The vast majority of her fans saw her as the fiery, sarcastic old fart who yells at kids to get off her lawn. But while Slappy enjoyed not giving a rat’s butt about most people, she did have a quiet side to her. She didn’t like to make it known very often, but it was always there. 

Her flowers were one of very few things that brought the peaceful side out of her. For one, flowers didn’t talk – she never had to tell her flowers to shut their trap, which she liked. And two, it was a quiet hobby of hers which she enjoyed fondly. Seeing her flowers grow luscious and beautiful overtime brought her a sense of accomplishment. In some ways, she felt more proud of her tulips than the countless trophies and medals she won from her now obsolete acting career. 

Once her tulips were properly nourished, Slappy set her watering can down and admired her bed of flowers in total silence. She looked up at the sky above her, a bright shade of blue, the clouds floating majestically overhead. Birds chirped as they flew around Slappy’s tree home. For a brief moment, the old squirrel's usual bitterness fizzled away, and she enjoyed a deep sense of calm. 

I gotta admit that the world is certainly beautiful, Slappy thought to herself. That is, as long as nobody is around to yammer about nonsense and crap. 

Slappy was so busy taking in her surroundings that she failed to notice her nephew emerge into the backyard. 

Skippy was hopping on one foot, trying to balance a soccer ball with his other foot. He was wearing his soccer uniform: blue jersey, gray shorts, black cleats with knee socks. He was counting to himself out loud, as he repeatedly kicked the ball into the air. 

“Thirteen..fourteen..fifteen..six-WOAH!” 

Skippy had not been looking where he was going, and had tripped over a stick that was lying in the grass. He fell onto the ground, his soccer ball went flying into the air. 

Slappy flinched when she felt something hit her in the rear. She was brought back down to reality, her mind no longer thinking about flowers and beauty. She glanced behind her and saw her nephew lying on his belly in the grass. She also noticed a soccer ball on the ground sitting at the brim of her feet. It didn’t take the old squirrel very long to connect the dots. 

“Watch where you’re kicking that thing!” she shouted, picking up the soccer ball now covered in mud. Her previous smile disappeared entirely, replaced by an aggravated scowl. 

She marched towards her nephew, still lying in the grass, placing her open hand on one hip. Skippy was frowning sheepishly, resisting the urge to laugh amidst his current predicament. 

“You almost hit my flowers, you klutz!” Slappy scolded, waving the ball in front of her nephew’s face. 

“Sorry, aunt Slappy,” apologized Skippy. The squirrel pulled himself off the ground, his jersey now coated in dirt. He attempted to brush it off, but ended up smearing the dirt instead. 

The older squirrel sighed. “We’re gonna have to wash that,” she stated, glancing up and down at the boy’s dirty uniform. 

“But soccer practice starts in twenty five minutes!” Her nephew exclaimed. 

“Oh well,” Slappy shrugged, finally, “It was bound to get dirty anyway.” She brushed off Skippy’s soccer ball and handed it back to him. “Be more careful next time, will ya? I don’t want my babies getting squashed by your antics.” 

“Babies?” Skippy tilted his head, raising an eyebrow. He looked behind his aunt at the bed of tulips. Then the squirrel noticed Slappy’s bright yellow sunhat, and her purple apron – very different from the old squirrel's usual attire. 

Skippy put a hand over his face, attempting to suppress his giggles. This attempt proved to be unsuccessful, as the boy soon burst into laughter. He fell backwards onto the grass, further dirtying his uniform. He thought that Slappy looked ridiculous. 

Slappy was confused. “What’s so funny?” She asked, a perturbed expression on her face. 

Skippy snorted, soothing his giggles for long enough to tell her. 

“You look funny, aunt Slappy,” he teased, sitting upward in the wet grass. 

The old squirrel made a face. “What? No I don’t,” she insisted, taken aback by her nephew’s observation. “This is what I usually wear when I tend to my tulips.” 

The young chipper squirrel rolled his eyes as he got up once more, brushing the blades of grass off of his rear with his claws. 

“You’re usually not up when I do this,” Slappy went on, “I like when I get to see my tulips every morning, watering them, admiring them. It’s quite relaxing, I’ll say. Especially when I’m alone – with no one else around.” 

Slappy couldn’t help being bitter with her words. She was still feeling sort of peeved that her younger nephew had interrupted what was usually her uninterrupted quiet time. 

But she knew that her salty sense of humor must have rubbed off the wrong way, as her nephew was now looking at her with an annoyed look on his face. 

“Not my fault that couch wants me at the field at ten in the morning,” muttered Skippy. “I love soccer, but getting up this early is a pain in the butt.” 

“I hear ya, Skip,” said Slappy. She placed a hand on her nephew’s shoulder, trying to come off as empathetic. “I ain’t a good morning person; never have, never will. My apologies for being cranky. You’re aunt Slappy can’t help herself sometimes.” 

Skippy’s frown faded, and was replaced by a toothy grin. “But that’s what I like about you, aunt Slappy,” he told her, “You don’t give a rat's butt about nobody.” 

“heh! You got that straight,” Slappy chuckled. “Say? You think I should wear this to your soccer practice?” 

“Yes,” Skippy agreed without hesitation. “My teammates will love it!” 

The two squirrels laughed, putting one arm around each other as they walked across the lawn towards their house. If there’s anything that Slappy had learned today, it’s that his nephew had taken after her a whole lot more than she originally thought.  

Chapter Text

Yakko was more than happy to come home the following evening. He quickly changed out of his ink-stained jeans and threw on a pair of fleece pants. He then got into bed, laying down on his stomach, and pulled out the textbook that he received from Miss. Flamiel earlier that day. He created a flashlight from his hammerspace, flicked it on, before diving his nose into the prologue on the first page. 

The power of a toon’s mind goes miles beyond center stage. From the very inception of a living drawing comes the consequences of an endless imagination. Toons were drawn with a natural incentive to mold their world, to rearrange things in ways that their human counterparts would call “preposterous” or “unworldly”. The world is a toon’s sandbox, and they – with the power of their animated mind – can kick the sand in any direction they see fit. 

An animated mindset widely differs from a traditional one. There is no such thing as a limitation in the mind of a toon. In fact, a toon will use an obstacle as motivation to test their mind even further – to think with their ink, as one may put it.  

Pretty soon, the boy found himself fascinated by the clever wording on the pages he held between his fingers. For a brief moment, Yakko felt like he was back at the foster center, in his old bedroom, next to a large stack of books. It was a shame that his backpack wasn’t big enough for him to bring all of his books to Joey’s house – he would’ve if he was able to. But he did bring with him a good few, the ones that he thought to be the most important to hold on to. 

I wonder if Warner Bros. has a library, Yakko thought to himself. If there is, I’d grab as many books as I can carry. It would be just the good old days: me, Jake, and a good book to read. 

“What’re you up to, big bro?” 

Yakko was taken out of his thoughts by a familiar sound. He looked up from his book to see his little brother trotting into the bedroom that they shared. Wakko plopped his body onto the bottom bunk, the mattress dipped down slightly with the weight of his body. 

“Oh, nothing much, Wak. Just– Uuhh..reading. Yeah, I’m reading. That’s all.” 

The younger of the two didn’t respond at first. Instead, he stared down at his feet as he dangled his legs over the edge of a bed, a certain thoughtfulness in his eyes. Yakko raised an eyebrow. He was always quick to notice when his brother was feeling troubled about something, and he felt pretty sure about what Wakko must be thinking.  

“You’re still upset from earlier, aren’t you?” The eldest inquired, posing the question in a whisper. 

Wakko sighed, and he rubbed the back of his neck. This caused Yakko to frown, guilt pouring over him. He didn’t mean to scare his younger siblings back at the commissary; he was frustrated, and he didn’t know how to vocalize his frustrations at that moment. 

“I guess you could say that,” Wakko said, after a long pause, “It’s just that– n-nevermind, it’s probably stupid.” 

“Go on,” Encouraged Yakko. He shifted himself closer to his little brother, placing his arm around his neck. “You can tell me anything, you know that? And if it will make you feel better, I won’t tell anyone. Pinky swear.” 

Wakko smiled for a brief moment, but soon returned to his frown. He squirmed nervously, attempting to pull away from his brother’s grasp. 

“I’m just worried,” Wakko started, “I don’t like it when you act like that. You always stay calm, even when things aren’t going okay. And seeing you not– it-it just rubs the wrong way, ya know?” 

Yakko nods in understanding. Although, deep down, he feels his stomach churn. He knew that his brother was absolutely right; he had become a master at concealing his pestering worries, as not to upset his siblings. The world had never been so lucky towards them. There was always the underlying fear of Wakko and Dot being separated from their dear older brother. Such a thought caused Yakko to wince. 

His siblings, his precious, innocent siblings, have always looked up to him. They knew that they could always go to him for comfort, to reassure them that things would get better, to remind them of the person who loves them the most. 

And he ran away from them. Such a coward he is. 

How could you have allowed yourself to get to that point? His conscience echoed in his mind, pestering him for his mistake. You told them you would never leave them behind. And what do you do? Exactly that. What kind of a brother are you? 

Yakko brushed his hand against his brother’s face. “I didn’t mean to run away,” he said, in an attempt to redeem his actions. “I was just..so exhausted, and annoyed. I didn’t know what else to do at the time. I understand if you’re mad at me. You have every right to be.” 

He curled his lip, and he shut his eyes. He attempted not to cry, but a few tears broke through. The guilt was too much for him to handle. How could he live with himself after what he had done? He made a promise to his siblings, and he broke it. He told himself again and again that he would stand by his siblings at all times, that he would never leave them, that he would protect them under any circumstance. 

Instead, he hurt them. 

They must hate you now, his conscience hissed, for the coward you really now. Do you really expect them to love you after you–? 

Suddenly, Yakko felt someone touch his arm, his eyes blinking open. Through teary eyes, he could see Wakko hugging his arms around his body, squeezing him tight. He could see the intense worry in his brother’s eyes. 

There was not even a smidgen of anger within those eyes.  

“Please don’t be sad, big brother,” he whined, ears drooping over his face. “I’m not mad at you. I’m just..scared. Everything is changing, and you’re not quite yourself anymore. I just want you to be alright. Please tell me your alright.” 

Another tear dropped from Yakko’s eye. Although, he felt a little better to know that his brother didn’t hold any remorse for his mistake. Of course, that didn’t stop his stomach from churning. 

“Oh, Wakko.” The eldest pulled his brother into his arms. “I haven’t been honest about what I’m feeling, and that’s not fair to you guys. The truth is that I am worried– about a lot of things, actually.” 

The two brothers sat in silence for a long while after that. Slowly, Yakko stopped crying, but that dreaded feeling continued to pester in his mind. Feelings of uncertainty, feelings of nervousness, feelings of failure. 

But Yakko knew that he couldn’t give up on himself – not now. It was a miracle that they were able to get recognized that night, that they were able to even step foot on the Warner Brothers lot. To think that he, Wakko, and Dot were orphans, not too long ago from now. Finally, they were being given the chance to make a name for themselves. Finally, they were being given the attention they were deprived of for their whole life. 

This thought was interrupted by a hand tugging at his arm. Yakko looked down at his brother, frowning at the sheer despair in his eyes. 

“Are we gonna be okay, Yakko?” Asked Wakko, meekley. “You don’t think we’re gonna be–” 

“Of course not.” Yakko cut his brother short, not allowing him to speak of such a horrible thought. “I have never allowed anyone to lay a finger on you guys. And I promise that I will never abandon you again.” 

These words were the final breaking point for Wakko. The flood gates opened wide as he dove head first into his brother’s chest, hugging his arms even tighter than before. Yakko rubbed the back of his brother’s neck to soothe him. He whispered words in his ear, reassuring him that everything would turn out okay, as long as they never gave up hope. 

I just hope that Joey is right, he thought to himself. 

Chapter Text

The sound of a door slamming shut echoed throughout the now empty laboratory, as the last scientist had clocked out and left for the night. It had grown dark outside, the lab hollow and silent. 

It seemed just like every other night. 

But Brain was not stirring as usual. He sat in the furthest corner of his chamber, the cage that filthy humans kept him in during the day. On any other night, Brain would’ve snuck out of his metallic prison, pondering up a plan of how he was going to escape his confinement. 

Tonight, however, something felt different to the Brain. He was pondering something that he never pondered before.

What if I am wasting my time? He posed to himself. All this thought I put in, this desire I have for something bigger. What if it is all for nothing? 

It was no secret to him that he was not living in the ideal conditions for such an intelligent creature like himself. He was in the hands of a bunch of heartless lab-goers, whose only method of affection is putting him through their merciless experiments. The thought filled him with rage, how heartless these so-called scientists really were. It only fueled his desire to escape from his confinement, to achieve something much greater than what he has now. 

But at what cost? Brain asked himself. Every night is the exact same! I spend hours and hours constructing a great heist, only for my scheme to fall short. Every. Single. Time. 

The thought made him squirm in his corner. Brain tugged at his ears, unconsciously, the thought poking at his mind. 

Every plan I’ve ever made has ended in a catastrophic failure. Despite this, though, I always expect to come out victorious in the end. But fate seems to relish in the thought of my failure, putting a stop to every one of my schemes! 

Brain winced when a horrible clatter erupted inside his chamber. His eyes trailed over to the blue-colored wheel planted on the wall of the chamber. A familiar lanky mouse was mindlessly running on all fours, his iconic goofy grin smeared on his face. 

And then there’s Pinky. Brain sighed. He put a hand to his face, remembering the countless times his chamber mate had foiled his greatest heists. He doesn't have the same desires as I do. He is content living the same stagnant life that he always has, never pondering anything around him. 

Pinky has never been much help for him. At best, he serves as a student of his, of which he can mold in his desired path. Most of the time, to his continuous misfortune, Pinky is a klutz, his clumsiness leading to the failure of what would have otherwise been a successful ploy. 

Yet, despite Pinky’s clumsy nature, Brain can’t help but point to the real culprit of his countless failures. 

Every invention, every scheme, every heist. They all point back to me. Brain began to sweat nervously. I always think of Pinky as the insane one, but..what if he’s not? I am the one who spends every night grieving over my life, planning heists that end in disgrace, inventing gizmos that blow up right in my face. 

Brain felt his pupils shrink. His hands trembled. He had come to a terrible conclusion, a thought his thick ego couldn’t begin to comprehend. 

What if…I am the insane one? What if I have been wrong about Pinky this entire time? What if I had been wrong about everything? What if-? 

“Brain?” 

He gasped. He had become so distracted by his grievances that he had sent himself down a spiral. His lanky chamber mate was now hovering over him, his goofy grin replaced with a worried glance. 

“Are ya okay, Brain?” He asked, “You don’t look like you right now.” 

Brain breathed heavily, his lungs started to hurt all of a sudden. Wiping the sweat off his forehead, he stood up, brushed himself off, and shot an agitated glare at his chamber mate. 

“I’m fine, Pinky,” he said, forcing the blunt response, “Just…pondering, yes, pondering to myself per usual.” 

Pinky made a face. “Pardon me, Brain, but you sound a lot grumpier than usual.” 

“I am not grumpy, Pinky!” Brain snapped, “Go back to your wheel or something!” 

He shot Pinky a hard scowl before turning away from him. On the inside, however, Brain felt a tremendous amount of guilt. Every time his emotions start to veer towards the surface, he is so quick to pull those feelings back down where they came from. 

Pinky is much more observant than I like to admit, Brain thought, uncomfortably. He may be a pain in my neck, but the fool has never left me. Godforbid he doesn't get taken away from me. Not again. 

Brain had to suppress a tear, as he reminisced the fateful day those monsters snatched him away from his family, separating them forever. He doesn't know where his parents are, or if they’re still alive at this point. Would they even love him anymore, after everything he has done? 

But, despite a history of misfortunate events, Pinky has yet to leave him. 

He looks up to me, despite the way I look at him. 

Pinky was like his little brother in that sense. Someone who, while not the brightest, was highly loyal, and was always up for coming along for the ride. He was able to see the brightest spots in the darkest of situations, a stark contrast to Brain’s cynical outlook on life. Have there been tensions between them? Yes. But Pinky has never held a grudge between him, which was remarkable, seeing how horribly Brain has treated him. 

It was right about now that Brain felt a heavy feeling in his chest. He frowned, fidgeted with his hand. He gazed at Pinky, who had gone back to running on his wheel. A new desire emerged in his mind, one that was so unlike him, but it felt right in this moment. 

He shifted from his corner over to Pinky. Brain forced a smile onto his face, brushing away the grievances that were still lurking beneath. 

“Hey! Pinky?” 

The lanky mouse noticed Brain’s presence. He tried to come to a stop, but his legs slipped on the wheel’s rotating surface. Pinky let out a screech as he was spun round and around, before being flung across the chamber. It was all Brain could do but suppress his laughter, as he witnessed Pinky’s body splat onto the wall, before sliding belly first onto the ground. 

Despite the violence that had just occurred, Pinky appeared not at all hurt by the hit. 

“Woah! That made me dizzy! NARF!” Pinky exclaimed, brushing himself off. He then noticed his friend standing before him. “Anyway. What was that you were saying, Brain?” 

Brain hesitated, his hand picking at a scab on his fur. He hadn’t prepared exactly what he was going to say, despite putting himself into this situation. He may be an intellect, but making relations was never his strong suit. 

He vowed to never get too emotional around Pinky; he never was one to crave sympathy, not even from his chamber mate. 

Perhaps, instead I should offer him some generosity, Brain pondered. It’s only fair, after the extent he has gone to for my sake. 

“Say, Pinky,” he started, “I just realized that I..I-I’m feeling a rumbling sensation quaking in my stomach. What do you say we, uh, refuel?” 

Brain held his breath for a second. He could never be too sure how Pinky would react to these sorts of things. Would he believe his words, or would he see past that and into his broken face? 

Luckily, the offer sparked a joyous reaction from his chamber mate. The thought of sneaking into the employee break room in hopes of finding leftovers made Pinky dance around in excitement. 

“Oh, boy! Would I Brain?” He gushed, that goofy grin of his as prevalent as ever. “Can we, Brain? POIT! Can we? Can we?” 

Pinky was practically begging on his knees, still feeling the need to get permission from his chamber mate. Brain managed a crooked grin as he put a hand on Pinky’s shoulder. 

“Yes, Pinky,” he said, “Only for the best.” 

Brain was much more reserved in his excitement, but deep down, he felt a loving sense that he didn’t feel too often. As much of a pain in the neck as Pinky could be most of the time, he knew his life would be much less eventful if he wasn’t there to keep him on his toes. 

He brings out the brother in me, Brain thought, I’d go mad if he wasn’t here to keep me at bay. 

Chapter Text

*The scene opens with the camera panning over farmland* 

Narrator: Out in the countryside

                 Coated in fields of maize

                 There sat a little cottage 

                 Where a candle was lit a blaze.

*The camera zooms into the house*

Narrator: This candle had no name

                 He sat alone on the window sill

                 Watching as day turned to night

                 As the farmer shut off his mill.

The Flame: Hey! Down here! 

*Camera moves down to where The Flame is. He gives the camera an annoyed glare*

Narrator: Oh, I’m sorry. No need to geer. 

The Flame: *sigh* That’s alright. 

                   I don’t get any company at night.

                   I never smile, I never feel glee.

                   I’m just Mr Nobody.

Narrator: But I am here, aren’t I? 

The Flame: True, but you’re just a voice in the sky. 

                    I sit here on the window

                    And watch as the cows graze to and fro. 

                    While I’m stuck here

                    With no place to go! 

Narrator: But you are a candle

                 You shine your light.

                 You’re a beacon for the animals

                 So they can see at night.

The Flame: But the animals are asleep. 

                     They’ve all gone to bed. 

                     They will be woken up at dawn

                     When it is time for them to be fed. 

                     Why should I be happy to act as a beacon? 

                     For pigs who will eventually be turned into bacon? 

Narrator: Mmm. I like bacon. 

*The Flame makes a face* 

The Flame: Hey! Who even are you? 

                    Quit being a trickster! 

                    Show yourself, Mr Narrator!  

*Camera pans to The Flame’s perspective, where a mysterious cloaked figure has floated into view* 

????: Who, me? 

          I’m Wakko! 

*The cloaked figure throws off his cloak, revealing himself to be Wakko Warner. Wakko was floating in the air with a balloon attached to his tail* 

The Flame: *Gasps* It’s you!                   

*Wakko picks up the candle from his window sill* 

The Flame: Wha- put me down! 

                     You big bimbo! 

*Wakko pulls a four-tier cake out of his hammerspace, and sticks The Flame on top of it* 

Wakko: Nighty-night, Mr Flame. 

The Flame: NOOOOO!! Don’t- 

*Wakko blows out the candle. He extends his jaw out, and plops the entire four-tier cake into his mouth, swallowing it whole – candle included* 

Wakko: Mmm. Smokey flavor. UUUUURRRRRRPPPP!! Pardon. 

*Wakko patted his stomach, feeling it bulge slightly* 

Wakko: I really gotta lay off the sweets. Maybe I’ll go eat some carrots from Bugs Bunny’s house. 

*Wakko grabs hold of his balloon and levates away from the house.* 

*Camera cuts to Wakko flying over a cornfield with the moon cast in the background. He can be seen grabbing a corn ear off of it's stock and tossing it into his mouth, before he flies out of frame* 

*End scene* 

Chapter Text

February, 1988 

“Patty cake, patty cake, baker’s man. Bake me a cake as fast as you can.” 

Yakko repeated the simple rhyme to his infant sister as he gently clapped his hands against Dottie’s tiny little paws. She struggled a bit with getting the rhythm down, but the toothy little grin on her face let her big brother know that she was enjoying his company. 

“P-patty..cake,” the one year old babbled aloud. 

“You like that?” Yakko asked with a grin. 

“L..l-like..likey,” she repeated, sounding out the letters to herself. 

It was hard to believe that Dottie was now one and a half years old, and she was growing by the day. Yakko still remembers when his sister was unable to talk. He would have to play charades with her sometimes to understand whatever it was that she wanted. Now, she was beginning to sound out letters, and repeat things that she heard. She was even able to say his name. 

“Yakko!” She chirped, pressing her paw against his chest. “Yak! Yakko! Yak!” 

Yakko felt his heart grow warm upon hearing his baby sister say his name. He wrapped one arm around her tiny body, and pulled her in for an embrace. 

“That’s right, Dottie,” he told her, gently, “I’m Yakko. Your big brother.” 

There was a deep sense of pride in him, knowing that he was the one who had taught Dottie how to say his name. It was an accident, really. Yakko was having an exchange with his two year old brother while fixing him a snack, when Dottie surprised the two of them by proudly chirping “Yakko!” At the top of her lungs. That was five days ago, and since then, she’s been saying his name nonstop. 

“Yakko! Yakko!” She stated, giggling. 

But Yakko didn’t mind one bit. He knew that Dottie loved him, and she was simply trying to express her affection towards him. She was still trying to get the gist of how to use words, and it was up to Yakko to teach her how to communicate. 

Gazing at his surroundings, Yakko noticed his mother in the kitchen. She stood over the sink, back hunched, still wearing the filthy work clothes that she didn’t have time to change out of. There was a bitter look on her face. She muttered curse words under her breath as she cleaned a glass plate which his aunt had bought for them. 

Dottie hasn’t said mom’s name yet, he thought to himself. So far, Dottie had only said his name along with Wakko’s. But the one year old had yet to utter the words “Mommy” or “Daddy”. 

Yakko figured he should teach his sister how to say their names. They were Dottie’s parents too, after all. 

“Who’s that, Dottie?” He asked Dottie, pointing at his mother in the kitchen. 

Dottie blinked. She stared blankly at Yakko for a few seconds, before looking away from him to touch her toes. Yakko’s eyes widened at the lack of a response, but he thought that his sister just hadn’t heard him there. 

“Who is that?” He repeated. He gently nudged his sister’s cheek and turned her head to look at mom. 

Dottie did not say anything. Her large pupils stare blankly at the woman doing the dishes across from where she was sitting. Finally, she looked back at her big brother, giving the same blank stare that she had given their mother. 

Yakko felt himself sweat, as he urged himself to hold back the sense of panic he felt in that moment. Dottie saw mom all the time. Her crib was located right next to mom and dad’s bed. Clearly, the one year old infant would be able to recognize her mother’s face, right? 

She looks confused, thought Yakko, noticing the perplexed look on his sister's face. Maybe I should try a softer approach. 

“That’s mommy,” Yakko told his sister in a gentle tone. “Can you say Mommy? Mommy?”   

The infant stared at her mother in the kitchen. The woman did not acknowledge the presence of her two children, not batting an eye for even a second. It was almost as if she didn’t realize they were even there. 

After a moment of silence, Dottie turned her head to face her big brother once more. She began moving her lips, trying to create sound for the first time in several minutes. Yakko felt his heartbeat quicken, anxious to see if his sister would respond. 

“M-mma…” 

“Come on,” Yakko lightly encouraged, “Say Mommy.” 

“Mmama” Dottie peeped, pressing her hand against Yakko’s chest. 

Yakko gasped. She actually said it. He was able to get Dottie to say “mama” for the first time. 

“Mama,” his sister repeated, looking up at Yakko with fond eyes. 

Suddenly, Yakko felt his excitement diminish. He frowned upon the realization that Dottie wasn’t talking to her mother; she was talking to him. She thought Yakko was her mother, instead of the woman who was standing less than ten feet away from her. 

How could this happen? He’s spent countless hours with his baby sister, taking care of her, making sure that she was happy. His mother put such a burden on her eldest son to look after his siblings to take care of his brother and sister while she went to work for hours on end. His father, too, spent much of his time out of the house. 

It was then when it finally hit him: Yakko was acting more like a parent than his mom and dad were. He was the only one who was taking care of Wakko and Dottie.

Why can’t mom and dad take care of my sibs? Why aren’t they spending time with them? Taking care of them? Making them feel loved? 

Yakko looked at Dottie, tears filling up in his eyes. He hugged his arms around her tiny body. Deep down, he wanted to apologize to her for the way things have become. 

But he knew he couldn’t upset her. He was her mother, confirmed through Dottie’s wide, curious eyes. 

Chapter Text

*Camera focuses in on Colin’s house. We see Colin come out from the front door, scurrying towards the center of the camera. Colin scuffs his feet, making eye contact with the camera.* 

Colin: “Okay. So..one time- ..O-one time, Randy Beaman came home from school. His mom asked him how his day was, but Randy Beaman didn’t answer. So his mom asked if he was okay and-” 

*Colin pauses, scuffing his foot on the ground, dusting his shirt off with his hand.* 

Colin: “..A-and Randy Beaman ignored her, so she asked again, but he just ignored her. A-and that was when Randy Beaman’s mom noticed that there was something inside Randy Beaman’s backpack.” 

*Colin reaches into his pocket, pulls out a yo-yo, and starts twirling it around in his hand.* 

Colin: “So..so asks ‘Hey, Randy Beaman. What’s that thing that’s inside of your backpack?’ So Randy Beaman turns around and says ‘It’s none of your business.’ Finally, Randy Beaman’s mom had enough, so she tried to grab the zipper to..to unzip Randy Beaman’s backpack.” 

*Colin accidentally drops the yo-yo, leading the yo-yo to roll off stage left. Colin ponders whether he should run after it, but decides not to. He scuffs his foot.* 

Colin: “And then…a-and then, Randy Beaman shouts ‘Wait!’, but of course, his mom doesn't listen. But before she could scold Randy Beaman, a ten..a ten foot long alligator jumps out of Randy Beaman’s backpack and eats Randy Beaman’s mom in one bite.” 

*Colin stops. He stares at the audience in silence for a few seconds.* 

Colin: “Okay, bye.” 

*Colin does a shy wave at the camera, before scurrying back towards his house, exiting through the front door.* 

Chapter Text

All: It is the approximate duration of time for the animated maniacs

We are peculiarly eccentric to the maximum amount 

All: So you may recline in your seat and be tranquil 

You will be amused until you become lightheaded 

We are the animated maniacs

Yakko, Wakko: You are invited to come along with the Warnereth brethrens

Dot: That includes the Warnereth sister Dorothy 

All: To arouse ourselves, we trot quickly across the perimeter of the parcel of land belonging to the Warnereth film studio

All: Constable Ralph will imprison us in a metal structure containing water in moments where we were found being naughty 

But we attempt a grand exploit, and proceed to run an outrageous distance

Thou now understand the concept

All: We are the animated maniacs 

Dorothy is enchantingly delightful

And Yakkavier speaks frequently 

Wakkorotti places the abundance of food into his stomach 

Whilst the gentleman William Clinton strums on the saxophone 

We are the animated maniacs 

All: We introduce you to the rodents named Pinky and Brain who wish to conquer the celestial body 

The Goodfeathers flock in close proximity

While the gentlelady Slappy Squirrel forcefully strikes the pigeons using her velvet handbag 

All: The dog buttons pursues his companion Mindy

While the cat Rita performs a stanza 

The storytellers have gone mad

We have not got a written script

Why should we concern ourselves with the act of rehearsing? 

All: We are the animated maniacs 

Walking with our documents granting us our fare 

We are peculiarly eccentric to the maximum amount

There is a large sum of sliced sausages that are thrown into our knickers 

All: We are animated 

And are indeed physcotic 

Dot: We are about to reveal the program’s title

All: Animated maniacs

Those were our objective statements

Chapter Text

Dot was in her room putting on her pajamas when she heard her door creek open. When she turned her head to see who it was, she saw Wakko standing there holding a blanket and pillow. There was a deep hollowness to his eyes, that usual happy-go-lucky facade he displayed was nowhere in sight. 

“What’s wrong?” Asked Dot, approaching her brother slowly. 

“Can I sleep here tonight?” Wakko mumbled. “I don’t want to sleep with Yakko.” 

Dot bore a look of concern for her brother. She knew that Wakko had been upset lately in the days leading up to their big exam tomorrow. It was safe to assume that this had taken a toll on him. 

“Come here,” she said softly, as she wrapped an arm around Wakko and led him towards her bed. “Tell me what happened.” 

Wakko had wrapped his blanket around himself. He gazed sadly at Dot, wiping tears from his eyes. 

“I’m mad at Yakko,” he told his sister, a bitterness in his voice. “He keeps talking down to me like I’m stupid. I don’t know why he keeps doing it.” 

Dot continued to rub his shoulder. She knew that Yakko had been pestering them over this exam, trying to get the two of them to study harder than ever so that they didn’t fail. She can definitely understand how that pressure could affect Wakko negatively.

“What did Yakko say, exactly?” She asked, gently.  

Wakko sniffled. “He said..how I don’t study hard enough,” he weeped, “and- and how I don’t care about this exam the way he does. That’s all he cares about anymore.”  

Dot’s eyes widened. She knew her eldest brother had been a jerk about this exam in the past, but this was beginning to get ridiculous. It seemed as though Yakko cared more about this exam than he did about them. 

“And then I got mad at him, and he got mad at me,” Wakko went on, “I called him an idiot. He told me to watch my mouth.” He stopped, and let out a sob. “He doesn't think that I’m smart. He thinks I’m an idiot.” 

At that moment, Wakko cuffed his hands in his face and cried.

Dot put her hand over her mouth in shock. She couldn’t believe that Yakko would do such a thing to either one of them. This whole exam has gone completely to his head, and now he believes that he can just walk all over her and Wakko whenever he feels like it, all because he thinks he knows more about toonology than they do. 

The thought made her feel angry, furious even, that her eldest brother would ever dare put them down in any sort of way. He really does believe that he is better than them, and he was willing to make Wakko cry to assert that. 

I think it’s time that I give Yakko a piece of my mind, she thought. Dot promised herself that she would give her eldest brother an earful, but counseling Wakko came first.  

“Breathe, Wakko,” she soothed, cuddling her brother tight. “That test is the least of your worries. You’re not an idiot, and never let anyone believe that you are.” 

Wakko released his hands from his face, his fur soaked with tears. “I’m- I’m not?” He spluttered. 

“Of course not.” Dot furrowed her eyes at your brother. “You’re one of the smartest people I know. You may annoy me at times, but gosh darnit I love you from the bottom of my heart.” 

Wakko wiped his eyes with his sleeve. He felt better after hearing his sister’s kind words. He always knew that he could rely on her in order to feel better. 

“Thanks, Dot,” he told her, sniffling. “I’m glad you care. I just wish that Yakko wasn’t such a jerk.” 

“Do you want me to talk to him?” Asked Dot. 

“Yes, please,” replied Wakko, “I really don’t want to talk to him right now.” 

Dot figured that her brother would be keen to that idea. She has always been more vocal about her feelings than Wakko has, with her brother having the tendency to keep quiet about these sorts of things. There was no way that she was going to allow Yakko to get away with hurting Wakko’s feelings over a stupid exam. 

Admittedly, however, this exam did seem to be fairly important, as it was supposed to be their final true test before becoming actors. Dot felt excited about the idea of being a star, and she knew that Wakko felt the same way. She knew that Yakko was the most passionate about being an actor out of all of them; she just wished that her eldest brother stopped being so cocky about the whole thing. 

“I think we should get some shut eye,” Dot told her brother. 

“Agreed,” said Wakko, already making himself comfortable in Dot’s bed. 

Tomorrow, they were going to be heading to the studio bright and early to take their exam. Dot hoped that she could squeeze in a word with Yakko before they left the house tomorrow morning