Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

2020 Olympic Games

Announcer One: This is it, Tara, the last skate of the night and it’s going to be a great one. They seemed a bit stiff together in the short program, hopefully it was just nerves. They just need to skate clean again and have fun out there!

Announcer Two: Yeah Michelle, despite the stiff performance earlier it was incredible execution. At twenty years old, this would be Kit Tanthalos’s first gold medal if they pull this off.

The arena is packed with people eagerly anticipating the last skate of the night at one of the biggest sporting events in the world- the Winter Olympic Games. Kit is a household name in the games and reveling in the spotlight. The previous short program was clean and received a near perfect score. The long program is going by in a blur for Kit, nailing each turn and jump.

Four minutes in, Kit starts sweating and shaking under the massive, bright fluorescent lights on the rink. The crowd is cheering loudly but she doesn’t register any of it — it’s hazy background noise. The sounds are drowned out by her heavy breathing, the music and four blades on the ice. They’re perfectly synchronized, dancing over the ice just like they practiced a thousand times. Kit’s body goes through the motions effortlessly, getting ready for the big jump as her partner positions to catch and lift her.

This is it, they’re winning the gold, Kit thinks in excitement. Just one more move and it’s theirs.The cold air pelts her cheeks as she twists and pushes off into the air. Kit keeps her arms tucked into her chest, spinning once, twice so her partner's hands catch her waist.

But they don’t.

Her body slams into the ice below like a rogue hockey puck. They missed the lift and the routine was over. She vaguely hears the crowd’s shocked chatter as she lies stunned on the cold sheet of ice, numbing the imminent pain.

Her Olympic gold dreams are gone. Everything she’s worked for is gone. She tries pushing herself up from the cold slippery ice and falters. Her head is throbbing and everything fades to black as the medics rush the ice and carry her off.

A few weeks later, Kit is sitting inside their indoor rink at home. She knows that, to an outsider, having your own private rink is odd and a huge privilege. But it’s all she’s ever known, living in a big house with acres of land and throwing big lavish parties. The rink is where she can run away from her problems, and it’s also her job. Training to be in the Olympics takes consistent practice and dedication. It takes over your whole life—there’s no time for much of a social life, let alone a relationship. Sure, there were a few girls she hooked up with and went on a few dates but no one Kit was serious about in the long run. Dating is a distraction. She can’t afford distractions when her life’s goal is to win a gold medal.

If Kit wants another stab at winning, to even qualify at all, she needs to know what went wrong as soon as possible. She needs to get back to her six- hour days, six-days-a-week regimen after her deep, purple bruises fully heal from her fall. Her head is a little fuzzy on what happened but she knows she wasn’t the one that made a mistake. The doctor said it was lucky she didn't get a concussion. While Kit didn’t want a concussion, it would be nice to have a reprieve from Sorsha’s insistence at reviewing her performance. Honestly, she’s lucky she’s delayed it this long. She sighs and reluctantly sits down next to Sorsha.

Her mom is sitting next to her with perfect posture, wiping the perfectly curled golden strands away from her face. They’re in a little nook off to the side of the indoor rink where they have a TV and couch set up with a bunch of blankets for warmth. It’s a tradition to rewatch her performances in every competition—today they’re watching back the Olympics recording. She’s been dreading this moment, not wanting to see herself fall but pushes those feelings aside with a steadying breath and carries on with her job.

“Look, see there, Kit!” Sorsha practically yells and pauses the screen, “Your partner got out of line with you and missed your jump completely! I’ve never seen them do that before, only when you two had fought prior to a….” she tapers off in realization of what caused the fall.

“Kit, what did you do?” Sorsha gives Kit a piercing look through her gold-rimmed wire glasses.

Kit stares at Sorsha with visible hurt in her eyes and crosses her arms. Of course she’s the problem. Her mother blames her for everything so why not this too. Kit tries to explain. “They kept messing around at the village center and showed up late to warm-ups, so, yes, I was mad at them.”

Sorsha raises her eyebrows but stays silent to let Kit finish.

“I told them to get their shit together, they were being completely unprofessional. We made that lift a thousand times before in practice. I was right where I needed to be, they weren’t!” She’s almost shouting now with tears blurring her vision. Quickly she wipes a tear with the back of her hand and hopes it seems like just brushing hair out of her face. She refuses to admit her mom’s judgment has an impact on her.

“Well, be that as it may, you’re out of a skating partner and a medal. Best get to practicing if you want to be back at the next games,” Sorsha gets up and leaves without another word.

Just as Sorsha leaves, Airk walks in. Before Kit can say anything, he starts going on and on about how he's smoothed things over with the Hasturs and they’d still sponsor Kit through upcoming competitions and the next Olympics, if she makes it on the team. Airk walks over and sits with Kit.

“Yikes, mom was sure in a rush to get out of here. I’d ask what happened but I can see it.” Airk says, pointing at the screen, giving Kit a knowing, sympathetic look.

Kit sighs, “I don’t need you to smooth things over for me. I could’ve handled it.”

“Oh sure, with your winning personality? Kit, come on. I was just trying to help. This is how I know how to help when it comes to you and mom. I’m your brother and I’m always going to be here for you.” Kit’s fists curl into tight balls, trying to contain her anger. Easy for him to say, he doesn’t have the world looking at his every move and he’s been so busy with his new girlfriends that she’s barely seen him lately.

“You know, you have it so easy! Everybody loves you because you're so charming and nobody expects anything from you. You don’t have to be in the public eye, you don’t have this pressure to be the perfect athlete and the perfect child. You can go do whatever you want and nobody cares. I wouldn’t be surprised if you left, too. Just like dad did.” Kit knows it’s harsh but she’s always been a speak first, think later type of person. She knows Airk won’t hold it against her. Kit falls silent, trying to hold back tears and Airk looks at her like he’s unsure if he should speak or not.

“I’m not going anywhere, Kit. I promise.” says Airk. He gets up to leave, giving Kit some space.

Kit watches him leave before staring at the paused screen, feeling warm tears spill over onto her cheek. She didn’t do anything wrong, she knows it. But she still feels guilty. She always feels guilty and trapped when it comes to her mother’s expectations.

At least when her dad was around, she could find reprieve. They’d take a hike in the woods behind the house or sit and play board games to take her mind off of things. She felt more herself around him— less judged. He just wanted her to be happy and to feel like she had a choice in every decision she made, her mother was the opposite.

Airk would join them most of the time. But her and Airk stopped spending a lot of time together after he disappeared when they were teenagers.

Kit wishes she had more choices. She wishes she could be brave and go after a different life than what was handed to her. Curling up on the couch, she wraps a fuzzy blanket up over head and tries to block everything out until she falls asleep.

Two Years after Olympics

It’s been almost two years since she lost the gold medal and she still hasn’t found a suitable skate partner. They’re cutting it close with competition season around the corner. Her mom spends every day hounding her about finding another partner for the Olympics but everyone they’ve brought in has been horrible…or a man. Kit hates it when her mother ignores her wishes for a female skating partner but she’s not surprised. Sorhsa always wants her to go the traditional route. But the qualifications just opened up — it just had to be two skaters, regardless of their gender and Kit was eager to break this specific tradition. She wants to be the representation she always wished for growing up. Sorsha is worried it’ll hurt their chances of winning competitions but Kit knows what she wants, she just hasn't found the right fit yet.

Her coach has a trip to pick up a new skater for another audition tomorrow. Thankfully, Kit has today off, giving her a chance to escape the Tanthalos mansion at a nearby outdoor rink. It’s not as busy in the evening, there’s only a few people skating. Kit skates over the ice, pushing off in relaxed strokes as her eyes land on one person playing hockey by themselves. It’s a sport she’s never really watched but can respect that they’re decent skaters, just not as graceful as figure skaters. There’s so many ways to enjoy ice skating, her dad would always make up games with ridiculous roles and get everyone on the rink involved. Back when they came here at least once a week when she was in elementary school.

Things were so much simpler then, no pressure, no training, just pure joy. Skating out here meant she could just exist and didn’t have a coach or mom breathing down her neck, critiquing her every move. It really took all the fun out of it sometimes. She loves this sport, though; there’s so much beauty and athleticism involved in it. You have to be aware of every angle and turn your body makes—you’re in control. It allows Kit to not only be in control of her body and mind but also her emotions.

She’s so in her head, she starts a turn not seeing a curly hair red-headed woman heading straight towards her. They slam into each other with a hard thud.

“Hey, watch out!” Kit yells and almost falls over if it wasn’t for her trusty toe pick and two strong arms around her waist keeping her steady.

“Shit! Sorry, you alright?” The woman says with a thick British accent. Her eyes do a double take at her once she’s anchored. Kit’s breath catches as her eyes rake over the constellation of brown freckles speckled all over her face and beautiful, hazel eyes that are staring at her with genuine concern. She snaps out of it and remembers how to speak again.

“Seriously? That’s all you have to say? You could’ve really hurt someone!”

The woman scoffs at Kit’s sudden outburst. “Well I did ask you if you were alright — and don’t act like you haven’t lost yourself on the ice.”

Kits eyes widen for a second, then return to the hardened shell she puts up for everyone. Apparently she wasn’t the only one lost in her thoughts today. Kit clears her throat and looks down briefly before looking back up.

“Just be more careful…you stay on that side of the rink, I’ll stay on this side.” Kit quickly gestures to both sides of the ice. She feels the woman’s soft breath on her chilled face and strong hands burning into her waist. They both look down, realizing how close they are still and push away avoiding all eye contact. When Kit does look up at her, she nods slightly.

“Whatever you say — Princess.” The redhead skates off, casting an amused side glance back.

Kit is furious and hates to admit it — intrigued.

She manages to skate around without much distraction.That’s not completely true though, since she keeps glancing over to the gorgeous redhead now playing hockey with a couple of kids. It seems like she’s giving them pointers on their game. It’s so damn charming, Kit finds herself drawn to the woman’s voice and laughter.

After about ten minutes have passed, she decides to leave. She’s got an early morning tomorrow and doesn’t want her mom privy to her public outdoor rink visits. She sneaks a look over one more time at the mystery woman, then just as quickly looks away, feeling heat rush to her face. The other woman glances over with a knowing smirk — she caught her looking.

She says goodbye in her head like she always does when she leaves this rink. She’s not even sure why she does it anymore. She didn’t get to say goodbye when he disappeared all those years ago, so she says it now. If Kit squeezes her eyes tight enough, she can still feel his presence and hear the ghost of his voice.

The next day, Kit’s muscles finally feel like they’re warmed up enough to try some jumps. She’s been stretching and skating for at least twenty minutes now. It doesn’t usually take this long for her to try certain moves out but she feels stiff, and on edge today.

She can’t shake the memory of the feisty redhead woman from yesterday. She’s normally a bit prickly around strangers and this person was no exception — except for the fact that she could’ve drowned in those honey speckled eyes.

She hears the door to the family rink open and continues gliding along, trying to stay on task. But then her mother calls her over to meet the new partner, breaking her concentration. Kit rolls her eyes and groans. Her eyes land on someone facing away from her, talking to her mother. Kit squints her eyes at the familiar red curls, tied up in a neat bun. Right as she skates up to the side, they turn around and Kit is met with those eyes she hasn’t been able to get out of her head all morning.

Well fuck. She’s in trouble.

“Hi, I’m Jade, and you must be Kit?”

Jade, that’s her name. Kit is impressed with how calm and collected Jade is acting, considering they’ve already technically met. At least they found a woman — admittedly the most gorgeous woman Kit has ever seen. But that's beside the point, her looks and initial attraction mean nothing if she can’t sync up and skate with her.

“Jade, huh?” Kit extends her hand to shake Jades. “How long have you been figure skating? I don’t remember seeing you at any competitions and I definitely would have remembered you.” Kit slowly slides her hand out of hers and seeing Jade blush was worth that slightly forward comment.

“Oh, I’m not a figure skater, I’m a hockey player.” Jade says matter of factly yet a bit frazzled.

“Then what are you doing here?” Kit asks with a bite that seems too tired to really penetrate before looking over at her coach in disbelief. “Are you fucking kidding me, Allagash? There’s no way we’ll ever be ready in time for the district competition, let alone nationals!”

“I’m a quick learner. At least give me a shot.” Jade quips back.

“No offense, but I don’t think you can keep up with me…see there’s skill and then there’s talent. And I happen to have both,” Kit huffs and crossed her arms, sizing her up with a challenging gaze.

Jade raises her eyebrows, “Such arrogance, really, well let’s go then, princess,” She teases.

Kit suddenly notices that they’re an arms length away from each other. Why does that keep happening? It’s like she’s being pulled in her direction or something.

“Stop bickering! Look neither of you have many options left, so I suggest you at least try to skate together.” Allagash makes a good point. Kit really doesn’t have time to drive someone else away, delaying any progress to the next competition. Kit rolls her eyes and gives up the fight.

They let Jade warm up for a few minutes before the audition. Kit knew Jade could skate but she lacked technique. How did they even find her and was it really that hard to find someone in her sport? Could she do lifts or turns or even a single axel jump? Allagash has them doing very basic movements to analyze Jade’s technique. Kit is not allowed to manage the audition elements anymore— according to the past complaints from Sorsha, she makes it too challenging and expects too much for just an audition.

Jade is struggling to keep up with her speed and keeps missing grabbing her hand on the turns. Most of the time, it causes Jade to fall forwards, because she’s horrible at using the toe pick on her shiny new skates. Kit’s a little worried that if Jade falls one more time she won’t be able to get up and she’s going to have to peel her off of the ice.

The audition is almost finished and they’re both out of breath.They head towards the side of the rink, sitting on opposite benches and take off their skates. Kit sees Jade rubbing her feet, trying to get feeling back into them. She knows that feeling all too well and chuckles at the thought.

She peeks over at Jade again, her breath seems to be evening out before she goes to meet with her mom. Then Kit looks over at Allagash who’s still taking notes behind the side board closest to her while humming that annoying ass song he made up earlier. She approaches him, not caring if he’s in the middle of writing.

“So, thoughts?” Kit raises her eyebrows, tilting her head slightly over to where Jade is now slowly walking towards the office area.

“Well, she’s got a lot to learn but has huge potential, and she’s known for her hard work and dedication. I think she can challenge you, which is saying something.” Allagash pauses before asking, “What did you think?”

Kit sighs and says, “I think we have a lot of work to do.”

Kit turns to walk down the carpeted path next to rink, stopping abruptly when she hears the tail end of the conversation and Kit stands still, lurking by the door in the dimly lit hallway like she’s a little kid again. The office area is sound proof but if you leave the door open you can hear everything down the hall from the rink. Her and Airk used to eavesdrop on Sorsha’s meetings when they were younger. The eavesdropping helped her get her head around any bad news.They eventually were caught and Sorsha made sure to keep the door closed and locked but every once in a while, she forgot — like today.

“Then we have a deal, Miss Claymore. I’ll show you where you’ll be staying for the time being — please, follow me.”

Kit is so focused on the conversation she doesn’t realize how close their voices are and jumps away when the door fully opens.

She’s met with Jade’s surprised face and a little smirk that makes Kit feel something she can’t quite figure out yet. That damn smirk. “We’ve really got to stop running into each other like this, huh?”

Kit pushes out her chest while backing away to let them both out of the room.

“Oh Kit, good, you're here.” Sorsha sighs in relief.

“Meet your new partner.”

Chapter Text

Jade is going on hour two of violently hitting pucks into the net. One after another, until she gets ten, twenty, in a row. Her muscles are burning and overexerted, as she replays the final penalty shot of the Olympic game over and over again. She didn’t play her best offense. She let down her team — and herself.

Hockey is all she wanted to do growing up and now she’s rethinking her whole life.

Screaming into the empty arena, she hits the next puck so hard it bounces off the metal frame, the sound reverberating in her ears. That last bit of anger releasing from her body; a rushing wave of exhaustion taking over in its place.

The shrill echo dissipates as she comes back to herself, shivering from her sweat soaked hair mixed with the cold air. She wasn’t supposed to be in the warm-up rink for this long but the cute events director made an exception and let her stay. She knew the final game was over, but just couldn’t let it go.

So she came back to the ice — to the exact spot where she missed the shot. It was wide open like it is now. After, her team patted her on the back while the other team celebrated victory behind them. The celebration was a loud contrast to the current silence surrounding her.

Before their game that night, rumbles of gossip whistled through the Olympic village about a big shot figure skater getting injured on the ice — costing her the gold medal. Guess she wasn’t the only one having a rough day.

Her thoughts are interrupted when her coach approaches the rink.

“Hey, Claymore! Take it easy, will you? The games are over, you can rest, recharge and start training later, yeah?” Ballentine nods and waves her in from the ice.

Reluctantly gliding over, she keeps her head down avoiding his pointed stare and bites her lip not knowing what to say to him. She let him down, she knows it. Ballentine was the closest thing to a father figure throughout her career. The trust and respect between them was one of the few things she felt like she could count on in this industry.

“Yeah, yeah you’re right.” Jade says and slides past her coach over to the bench. “I’ll head to the locker room and change. We’ve got an early flight anyways and could use the rest.” She’s exhausted and can’t hide her defeated mood.

“Jade, I know you’re disappointed but you played a good game out there. The whole team did. Don’t diminish your accomplishments by dwelling on the mistakes. Besides, you never know what other opportunities are out there for you.” Ballentine says, his tone filled with hope. It’s too optimistic, and she’s not in the right mindset to receive feedback, she just wants to be by herself and sulk. Giving a halfhearted nod, she slowly heads toward the back room.

She turns around one more time, needing to get this out, “I hope to someday make you truly proud, make you feel like all this time and effort into training me was worth it.”

In the next few weeks, Jade regroups at home, taking some time to spend with family. Scorpia keeps her busy trying to take her mind off what happened and contemplates whether to sign another contract with the Geledorn team or take some time off.

She ends up playing with Galedorn for another year—it’s a good paycheck but realizes her heart isn’t in it anymore. They don’t extend the contract with her after it expires. It doesn’t really come as a surprise and ultimately allows her to take some time off to figure out her next moves — on and off the ice.

Two Years after Olympics

Two years later and she still blames herself. It’s been hard to come to terms with not only the loss of the game, but her career. However, the time away from the relentless pressure has helped her process everything.

Jade practically lives at Reavers Rink lately — Scorpia and Boorman opened it last year and enlisted Jade’s expertise to help with everything. She now coaches the local girl’s hockey teams and teaches basic to intermediate skating lessons. It’s given her new meaning to help kids just starting out in their dreams. When they find out she was in the Olympics, it inspires them to know it’s possible — even if it’s a miniscule chance they’ll actually make it.

She passes her Olympic hockey jersey hanging on the wall in a beautiful black frame next to the concessions, its presence mocking her every move. The only reason it’s on public display is at Scorpia’s insistence — she was proud of her and it added credibility to the job.

Methodically, she sets up the goals on the ice before her team comes into practice. Enjoying the silence and mundaneness of it. Abruptly jumping at the irritating sound of Boorman yelling at her.

“Hey, workaholic sister in-law! Someone’s here looking for you, thought I’d warn you before my beautiful empress sends him over here.”

Jade presses her thumb and forefinger to her temple feeling a headache looming on the horizon.

“If this is another upset parent about practice, I told Scorpia to tell them it’s non-negotiable. All players get here on time or they can’t be in the game. That’s the rules.”

“No, no, no! Nothing like that. He's a coach, something about a try out or ya know now that you mention it…” Boorman starts rambling. But Jade has had it with this man for today.

“Boorman, I don’t care! Go away, there’s someone heading right over here. I’m guessing that’s the guy you’re talking about.” Jade gestures with her head for him to leave. Boorman looks over his shoulder at the person approaching and gives a thumbs up as he side-steps out of her way.

“Hello, Jade Claymore?” The middle aged, long haired man extends his hand to shake Jade’s. He’s in an expensive tan, suede suit jacket with slacks and a thin scarf that doesn’t look like it would help with the cold whatsoever.

“My name is Allagash. I hate to interrupt your work but I’m an Olympic coach and would appreciate a minute of your time.”

Oh great, someone to remind her of her past mistakes. Maybe he’s here to see what a washed up hockey player is doing these days. She’s being hard on herself, she knows it, but plasters a polite smile on her face and nods to see what this random man is doing at her family’s rink. Jade prides herself on staying calm and smiling through introductions, it’s a specific skill she’s picked up meeting the countless parents that orbit around her.

“Hi, nice to meet you. I hate to disappoint you, but I don’t compete in hockey professionally anymore so if this is about—” Jade is interrupted before she can finish.

“Oh no, it’s not about hockey, I assure you. I’m a figure skating coach and I’m here to offer you a try out for a pair skating position. The competitor’s family will compensate you for all of your time, even if you don’t make it past the try out.” He explains everything calmly but Jade has a hard time understanding why he’s asking her. She can't hide her confusion anymore, her eyebrows furrowing at the words coming out of this man's mouth.

“Hold on, I don't understand. You want me to try out for something I’ve never done, and have no idea who I’d be skating with — why me?” She is thoroughly lost at this point.

“Well, you have quite the reputation in your sport, one of the best actually. And it’s been difficult finding the right match with the athlete I’m working with so we thought we’d try something…different.” Allagash looks at Jade with slight desperation. But charisma seems to be his strong suit since he is kind of convincing her.

“All I have to do is try out and you’ll pay me?” Jade can't deny that she’s intrigued. She could use the money right now. Coaching local hockey and skating lessons at minimum wage only got her so far. Sure, she had some savings from playing pro but a lot of that money was invested in her sister’s business.

“How much exactly?”

Allagash hands her a preliminary contract. She briefly looks it over and her eyes about bulge out of her skull at just the tryout pay, let alone if she sticks with it. It’s rather vague in specifics but he explains depending on how tryouts go, she’ll get the official contract to sign if she agrees to follow through with the job.

“If you accept the offer, we leave tomorrow night, weather permitting. I’ll give you the next 12 hours to think it over.” He smiles and adds that it was nice to meet her before walking away. She nods and stares dumbfounded at what just happened.

Scorpia runs up to her beside the rink wall and eagerly asks, “Oi! What the hell was that all about?”

“I’m honestly not sure. He had a job offer for me,” Handing the slim contract over to her sister, “to skate somewhere else for some family?” Jade sighs into her hands like she always does when she’s stressed. She needs to concentrate on her current job. The girls on her team had gotten there early and were screaming behind her and trying to out skate each other. Their screams worsen the headache unfolding in Jade’s brain with every passing second.

“I don’t know Scor, I’ve got a team to coach today so I’ll talk to you later, yeah?” Jade was stressed the fuck out but knew she needed to talk this through with her sister later tonight or she might chicken out altogether.

Jade’s team wins the game later that day and she couldn’t be prouder of them. When she was little she’d wished she could play on a real team. They didn’t have any official girls hockey teams back then, so helping them now feels full circle, helps heal that hole in her heart from her childhood. About a half hour later, she’s closing up the building. Taking one last walk through before switching off the buzzing fluorescent lights and locking up, her throat and ears burning from the sub-zero cold. Luckily her drive home isn’t long.

Her phone rings as she opens the door to her small and cozy apartment, not far from the rink.

She doesn’t have much of a social life and can’t remember the last time she even considered going on a date or hanging out with a friend. Her life consists of her family and work — which all revolved around the rink. It was a bit isolating at times, but she knew what she was getting into when she committed to helping her sister open up the rink.

She has four missed calls from Scorpia. Shaking her head, she taps her sister’s number. Scorpia answers in one ring. “Scor, I told you I’d call you after the game. No need to blow up my phone.” She laughs at Scorpia’s impatience, which is really Boorman forcing her to bug Jade about the job offer.

“Listen, Boorman was talking a bit about this fancy job offer, and it sounds like a good opportunity. I know you love coaching the junior team, but the season is over. Why not give this try out a chance? I don’t want to see your talent go to waste.” Scorpia doesn’t let Jade get a word in, then pauses to let Jade think.

Scorpia always knows what to say when she’s stuck on a decision. Jade sighs into her reply, “I think you’re right. I have to leave tomorrow though and I'm not sure when I’ll be back home. Could be two hours, two months, two years! Which basically means I have to quit one job to go try out for this other one.”

“Slow down, Jade. I’ve got the coaching job covered. Don’t worry about that and go after this, okay?” Jade nods even though she can’t see her. It’s decided — she’s going.
______

Turns out they have to get on an earlier flight due to a nasty winter storm approaching later that night. They arrive a day earlier than the audition. After settling in for the day, she ends up finding a nearby outdoor rink to practice for a bit and it helps her feel less restless about everything.

The rink is pretty empty for a weekend. There’s a few boys and girls playing around with some hockey sticks and pucks on one side of the ice and a few people free skating.

One woman zipping around the ice like she owned it, clearly in her own world.

Jade always admired the skaters that could execute spins and not get immediately disoriented in the process. She knows the basics and can do a few fancy jumps and tricks but when you don't do it on a regular basis, your body doesn’t have the muscle memory.

Just as Jade turned around from skating backwards, one of her favorite things to do, she wasn’t paying attention to a certain short haired brunette coming straight at her. Jade latches onto her waist to keep both of them from falling over. This woman was immediately pissed with her, no apology or thanks in sight.

When she mentions being lost on the ice, her icy blue eyes widen and she couldn’t help but notice the blush creeping across her sharp cheekbones. Her eyes are entrancing and her choppy hair is a mess from her hat falling off in the collision. The sweaty strands of hair are plastered to her forehead, it's hard to resist the random urge to push the hair back from her face.

Jade realizes her hands are still gripping this woman’s waist and jumps apart as if shocked by a lightning bolt. They both agree to stay on separate sides of the rink. Fine with her, except now she’s a bit chilly without the extra body heat. She’s being ridiculous, she just met this woman.

One of the kids asks for her help with their hockey game, she ends up coaching them a bit but her eyes keep wandering over to the handsome ice princess skating circles around everyone else. She was commanding her attention, some type of gravitational pull that wasn’t there a minute ago.

She catches the mystery woman looking over at her one more time before leaving and her heart skips at the thought of someone being interested in her. Jade stays for a few more minutes, cooling down from the workout, with a permanent smirk all the way back to the hotel.
_____

Before she knows it it’s six o’clock in the morning and they’re pulling up to the largest house she’s ever seen in person. With her old Olympic duffle bag thrown over her shoulder and a deep breath she approaches a regal looking woman standing outside. She has long blonde hair, wearing a long maroon dress with an elegant embroidered coat and scarf. Her wardrobe screams old money.

“Welcome, Miss Claymore. I’m Sorsha Tanthalos, we appreciate your time coming out here to try out.” Jade smiles politely and shakes her hand.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you and I’m looking forward to meeting the other skater.”

She notices the short worried look between Sorsha and Allagash. Who is this skater and why did she recognize the name Tanthalos?

They walk into the massive building connected to the rest of the mansion. It’s just a typical rink but with more exorbitant wood carving trims and the lighting is softer than the usual commercial fluorescent lights. The natural light streaming in through the windows makes it seem almost ethereal. Heading towards the ice while chatting, not paying attention to the skater until Sorsha calls them over.

She turns around and comes face to face with the piercing eyes she dreamt about last night. She’s never experienced an immediate attraction, a pull like this before in her life.

The realization hits her like a semi-truck, the blue eyed, small, messy haired brunette is Kit fucking Tanthalos. America’s favorite ice princess everyone loves to hate. Jade feels like an idiot for not recognizing her yesterday but tries to keep herself calm and under control. She’s being watched and needs to impress these people.

After some heated pleasantries, they warm up and start skating.

The audition is intense and only slightly humiliating. Jade gives it her all, even on the warm-ups.

They bicker about the toe pick feature on the blades of the skates for a good minute. Jade was slowly learning with every fall on the ice just how important toe picks were going to be in her near future. Kit laughs at her stretching to grab her hand on turns and failing to be fast enough.

“Toe pick!” Kit chides in a higher melodic pitch than her normal lower register, especially when it’s paired with a cocky smirk. Jade stares up at Kit from the floor of the ice and groans in frustration, mostly at herself. She can fucking do this, she just hasn’t been practicing like she used to and the ice princess is really pissing her off.

“You’re gonna have to be faster than that, Claymore!” Kit says chuckling above her and skates away as Jade peals herself up from the ice. This woman is infuriating!

Kit is like dynamite on the ice. She knows every loop and turn and expects you to be right there by her side. She’s a perfectionist, just like her perfectly curated outfit. Everything in its proper place until halfway through Kit takes off her sweatshirt revealing toned arms and abs under a cropped shirt. Jade’s eyes trailing up Kit’s neck to her pulling strands of sweat soaked hair back into a haphazard updo.

The brief pause distracts her but she doesn’t find it too hard to get back into the audition.

The good news — she didn’t totally fail and held her own. The bad news — her body is not as in shape as it used to be when playing pro and she was feeling it after this tryout. It leaves her wishing she kept up with her hockey endurance training and that she paid more attention to the more advanced skaters at Reavers Rink.

Wiping sweat off her forehead, she slowly leans over on the bench taking off her skates trying not to wince at the pain. Glancing over at Kit every once in a while in the process. She can’t seem to not glance at her, but reluctantly heads down the hallway to Sorsha’s office to discuss the audition.

Sitting down in the almost gothic designed office and Sorsha immediately starts writing a check for traveling all this way. She goes on and on about the trouble Kit has caused lately, scaring off other skaters with her snarky attitude. Before she can get a word in, Jade realizes she’s being let go from the job she knows she can do, if they just give her enough time to practice.

“Look, Kit is Kit. Sudden changes bring out her…color.“ Sorsha explains and casually extends the thin paper over as if she’s handing out a promotional flier on a street corner waiting for someone to take it.

“Oh, is that what you call it?” Jade takes the check and almost chokes on her own saliva from the ridiculous amount of money scribbled with perfect cursive handwriting on it—-for a single audition.

“Excuse me,” interrupting Sorsha going on about winning Olympic gold. “but I think I’m exactly who you need for Kit. As a skater, I mean. And if I pull this off,” slamming the check down on the mahogany wooden desk, “double it all or I get nothing.” Sorsha’s left eyebrow raises at the proposition and gives a curt nod.

She knows she has a long way to go. It feels extremely daunting to be ready for any figure skating competition, let alone the Olympics but Jade feels like this is exactly where she’s supposed to be right now. Maybe she can shake things up a bit around this place.

After finalizing her contract she almost slams into Kit again within twelve hours of knowing each other. She smirks at Kit now defiantly backing away from the office door, trying to act like she wasn’t just eavesdropping on their conversation.

“Oh Kit, good you're here.” Sorsha sighs in relief.

“Meet your new partner.”

Jade clears her throat at the awkward silence, hands in her pockets, waiting for someone to say something. Kit finally speaks up.

“Looking forward to working with you, Jade.” Kit whips around, ready to dart out of there.

Sorsha stops Kit with a firm hand on her shoulder. “And where do you think you’re going? Don’t be rude, Kit. Please show Jade to her quarters and get her settled in.” Sorhsa says and walks over to the rink to talk to Allagash, leaving her and Kit in the hallway.

Quarters? What universe did she just walk into? Kit is teetering on her feet, looking anywhere but Jade’s face. Which is a stark contrast from their previous fiery interactions.

This woman practically hit on her earlier, making her stomach do flips, and now can’t seem to make eye contact.

“Well, you gonna show me around or not, princess?” She’s not sure what’s going through Kit’s mind but it’s fun to guess. Kit abruptly turns on her heels and waves Jade forward.

“I can give you a full tour later, maybe my twin brother could join us, he’s a lot better at that sort of thing.” Kit walks ahead through the extravagant dining area that could easily fit twenty people at the table. Jade thinks she glimpses an entire ballroom to their right but Kit darts out a side door of the chef’s kitchen and Jade follows right on her heels.

“Uh, Kit where we goin’? Am I not staying upstairs?” Jade asks.

“Come on, keep up, Claymore!” Kit smiles, rolling her eyes at her and walks across the backyard over to a guest house. They walk into a beautiful, modern little living area with a full kitchen off to the side. There’s a small hallway that leads to a bedroom and a full ensuite bathroom. It’s twice as big as her apartment back home.

“The fridge and freezer are fully stocked, so make yourself at home. Practice is at six-thirty sharp.” Kit’s leaning with her arms crossed on a wall that breaks up the kitchen and living room, still wearing the tight cropped shirt and leggings from earlier. The outfit hugs all her curves, toned abs peeking out through where her top rides up just enough. Jade has to actively restrain herself from raking her eyes back over her body.

This is a job—stay professional. You can not be into your skating partner—that probably already hates you from all the horror stories Jade’s heard about this woman.

Clearing her throat, she finds her words, “Yeah, thanks again and I guess I’ll see you tomorrow morning?”

Kit nods and pushes off the wall, simultaneously flexing her muscles and Jade almost loses it. She has to practice with her for hours every day, she’s got to get herself together. She’s worked with hot women all the time in her career and had no problem, but Jade can’t keep her eyes off Kit.

Kit is almost out the door and turns around, the sun peeking out from behind her sharp profile. “Oh and there’s ice packs in the freezer, seems like you might need them.” She gives Jade a sly wink and leaves Jade standing in the middle of the room.

Oh, she is in trouble.

Chapter Text

Jade jolts awake, barely registering her phone alarm on the nightstand next to her. She reaches over to turn it off, wincing in pain at the deep bruise on her shoulder from yesterday's audition. She hadn't fallen that much on the ice since she was a kid trying to master some new tricks. Not even the brutal checks against the rink shield used to hurt this much after. Either that or she was getting older and not bouncing back as well.

Jade hates to admit it, but Kit might be right about needing those ice packs. Everything hurts.

She slowly sits up in the cloud-like bed and groggily puts on her glasses. Surveying the cozy bedroom, taking a few seconds to remember where she woke up. It’s going to take awhile to get used to this new place, this new job.

She’s been out of a professional job like this for so long she forgot the overwhelming pressure that comes along with it. That feeling of always being perceived by someone else, as if her body isn’t her own but something she signed away in a contract. There were heavy expectations pressing down on her shoulders as if an old, familiar injury had flared up. While she was ready to tackle this challenge, it didn’t make it seem any less daunting. On top of learning new skills, there is a lot of catching up to do in technique and endurance training if she was going to be ready to qualify for competitions. The amount of training is going to be intense to say the least.

Training. Scrambling to pick up her phone and check the time.

Shit, it’s almost time for practice. She’s going to be late and she hates being late.

Racing over to the rink with her duffle bag, she originally wanted to get there early before anyone else but that was highly unlikely now.

Jade opens the heavy door and rushes into the building, only to find Kit landing a perfect double axel with ease. She’s clearly been here awhile and it makes her wonder if Kit told her the wrong time. She lets out a frustrated growl and is slightly out of breath from her sprint over. She takes a deep, controlled breath and gets to work.

Two can play that game.

The next morning Jade wakes up extra early and rushes through her morning routine. She puts on the clothes she set out the night before, puts her contacts in and downs a protein shake for quick fuel. She really wants to prove herself to the Tanthalos family that she’s committed and willing to put in extra hours of practice.

She sprints over to the rink and it pays off this time.

It’s all hers.

After a brief off ice warm up, she puts her skates on in record time. It feels odd being here alone until she starts her laps and crossovers. Being in the rink feels like home even though home is hundreds of miles away right now. The cold air hits her face and it makes her feel alive, it quickly escalates into a warmth that ignites her muscles.

She decides to practice more footwork and tries to imagine Kit right beside her on the ice. Skating with other people around her is something she’s used to but Jade knows it’s completely different than only having Kit there with her. She has to know where Kit is at all times and there has to be a parallel flow to how they work.

She hears a door slam and Kit’s quick footsteps echo through the rink as Jade finishes her warm up.

Kit’s face falls as soon as she sees Jade, clearly not happy she wasn’t first. Kit isn’t the kind of person that’s used to losing – ever. Jade dramatically extends her arms out to her sides and shrugs while setting herself up for a double toe loop. Jade chuckles under her breath and loves how satisfying it is to one up her.

They’re even now.

One for one.
________________

Kit growls when she wakes up a little later than she wanted to because Jade has beat her to the rink every morning the last two weeks. This silent competition between them, while frustrating when she loses, is also motivating. She actually looks forward to practice and has something new to look forward to every day.

This time she makes it there before anyone else and enjoys the silence for a while before Jade barrels in looking more disheveled than the last few days.

She’s been observing Jade and so far she’s gathered the following traits:

1. She's exceptionally organized and methodical. She brings her folded socks and ties her skates in a very specific order. It could be a superstition or she’s just very particular about her process.

2. She’s a skilled skater but hasn’t skated intimately with someone before - clearly used to skating with a team which is better than a solo skater.

3. She makes this cute frustrated expression where her nose bunches up and there’s a fire in her eyes Kit is growing extremely fond of lately.

Jade must’ve overslept. Her eyes look droopy and her sweatshirt is backwards. Kit wonders how long it will take her to notice it's wrong and decides not to say anything. Instead, she makes a bet with herself Jade doesn’t notice until the end of practice. Jade tends to laser focus and everything fades away until Alagash yells for lunchtime and then she snaps out of it.

Jade’s put in extra effort to catch up to where she needs to be to test and compete. It makes Kit more at ease about their chances. She’s still rough around the edges though.

Jade has clearly played hockey her whole life and definitely never cared to learn any type of choreography. Her arm and hand placement are all over the place and she quickly realizes they’d need to double their ballet and off rink practice so she could gain the muscle memory needed to appease the judges at competitions.

Their schedule is so exhausting that Kit fell asleep in front of her mom at the dinner table.

They warm up off and on the rink at the crack of dawn, then have a few hours on the ice. After that they usually took a break to eat and regroup. Ballet was up to three times a week and they alternate cardio and weightlifting every other day.

As the weeks pass by, they don’t talk about anything personal. It’s all work talk and when practice is over for the day, they go their separate ways.

It wasn’t like Jade didn’t try to make small talk here and there, she did but for some reason Kit would just divert it to be about practice. She felt like she needed to keep her heart boarded up and safe from intruders. And Jade was a threat to all her walls she’s carefully cemented around herself.

However, each little thing Jade tries to chip away the walls is slowly but surely working on her.

The other day during their brisk Autumn morning run, it of course turned into a competition. Jade forgot her hat and her ears were turning red in the icy air as they finished up the trail. The last fourth of a mile Jade suddenly paces behind Kit, snatches her hat and sprints off in front her.

“Hey! What are you doing?”

“If you want your hat back, princess, you’re going to have to catch up to me and get it back!” Jade replies with a goofy smile while putting on the hat and taking off in the direction of the house.

“Oh you're so on, Claymore!” Kit yells watching Jade run ahead of her looking back to see if she’s chasing her or not. Reminiscent of kids playing tag without a care in the world.

Fuck, it’s cold and she’s got a hat to snatch back. She takes off in the direction of the redhead that surprises her at every turn and makes her smile more than she’d like her broody self to admit.
________________

It’s been a few months now and Jade finally feels like she’s getting a good groove down during the non-stop practices. Allagash makes them skate side by side every single practice. Left, right, left, right. Positioning and timing every move to be as in sync as possible. They were progressing really well at syncing up their movements. Jade’s edge work was so precise that their coach told Kit to try and mimic it a bit more. To Jade’s surprise she didn’t try to challenge it, she just agreed and asked Jade to show her some drills that might help her out later.

Jade’s confidence had wavered a bit recently and she briefly lost sight that she’s a professional too. It felt odd teaching the famous Kit Tanthalos something instead of the other way around. They just have different methods. And for some crazy reason, their methods seem to play off each other perfectly.

After a brief break they start working on lifts — something Jade has never tried and feels ridiculously intimidated by at the moment. Allagash suggests Kit be hung up in a harness so Jade could get used to where her hand placement would be. The place they told her to put her hands and press into seems so intimate that a crimson blush is flooding through her cheeks up to her ear tips.

Jade is directly below Kit and it feels really ridiculous and vulnerable. There’s a level of familiarity they haven’t quite gained yet that’s required for these lifts.

“Hold on, you want my hands to go where?” Jade questions her coach in shock.

“Jade, c’mon it’s fine.” Kit impatiently sighs at Jade’s hesitation.

Allagash points to Kit’s top inner thighs. Jade swallows and places her hands in a triangle into Kit's upper thighs. She clears her throat as she feels the warmth radiating from her most private area. She knows it's not sexual but can’t help thinking it’s sexual in nature. Her attraction to Kit doesn’t help this feeling of touching Kit there.

She quickly switches her way of thinking and practices the lift again and again. Kit is still so tense — it’s obvious she doesn't trust her yet. If they’re ever going to get these lifts down there needs to be full trust. Kit isn’t letting her move her hand for her to dismount. One wrong move and Kit is head first on the ice but one wrong move from Kit and Jade could have a blade slice through her thigh or worse her head.

Either way, not ideal scenarios.

“What the hell was that, Kit?” Allagash yells over at them.

Jade had to put Kit down in a rush otherwise she would’ve fallen.

“You two have got to work on these more. And above all, you need to start trusting each other!”

Allagash storms off in the direction of Sorsha’s office, leaving Kit and Jade to work it out themselves.
________________

Kit is sitting on an old wingback chair off to the side of the rink, curled up under her favorite blanket and thoroughly engrossed in an epic fantasy book. This book had been on her list for ages and she was just getting to the part where the rebellious princess was running off with her beautiful, stoic knight when a hockey puck slammed against the partition to the left of her. Kit almost jumps out of her chair and Jade immediately apologizes, promising to keep her pucks out of the air next time.

Jade is messing around on the ice with her old puck and a couple of hockey sticks during their break and it’s distracting the shit out of her. They are waiting on Allagash to get back to discuss choreography and competition plans that are looming like a swirling vortex in the horizon ahead.

She’d leave but deep down she’s trying to stay in close proximity to Jade. She doesn’t want to admit she has a slight crush and tells herself it’s for professional reasons only. They do need to bond after all.

Kit keeps glancing up from her book, peeking as Jade sprints across the rink and hits the puck into imaginary goals she set up for herself.

Jade looks lively playing hockey by herself. About ten minutes ago, she stripped down to a muscle tank top that showed off her toned arms and Kit couldn’t help how her eyes glanced over at them every time Jade went to hit the puck. Her muscles flexed in the most sexy way that caused a tight feeling in her lower abdomen and a tingling sensation to travel down Kit’s spine. Luckily, Jade is facing away from her so she won’t get caught blatantly checking out her skating partner.

Kit lets out a deep sigh, releasing the tension and breath from her observations.

Jade looks over immediately, squinting her eyes. Kit brings her book back up in front of her face. Hearing Jade’s blades inch closer to where she is, there’s no barrier between where she’s sitting and the rink.

Jade could skate right up and touch her if she wanted to and that’s excatly what she does.

Trying to concentrate on the pages directly in front of her, a wooden hockey stick suddenly appears at the top of her book and gently pulls it down. She’s met with hazel brown eyes and a smile that makes Kit’s stomach do flips.

“Wanna play?” Jade asks. “I’d love to show you my world for a bit.”

Kit nods, “Okay, I’ll play. But just know I’m an expert at games.”

“Noted,” Jade chuckles. “Take that stick and you want to hold it like this.” Jade shows Kit the proper way to hold it.

This was Jade’s element she’s entering —- a world where there are no perfect lines or graceful movements expected of her. There’s a beautiful unrestrained aggression in it. Seeing Jade play, even briefly, sets a spark off in her. Jade was more playful as they spent more time together. It was exhilarating. It reminded her of when she was a little kid running around with Airk and her dad. She just needed to loosen up a bit more.

Opposing sticks clash on the ice below, set up to attack the puck below them. Staring right at Jade, face to face and ready to take her on. Jade quickly steals the puck from Kit, laughs and speeds toward the fake goal scoring immediately.

“You’re going to have to be a little quicker than that, princess.”

Kit scowls at her challenge. Simultaneously, her stomach flips again at her nickname from Jade.

Sticks back on the ice, clashing in a struggle for dominance. Kit manages to steal it but Jade is on her heels and whips around her stealing back the puck in an embarrassingly short amount of time, racing toward the other side and scoring again.

Back at the starting point, she tries to loosen up but her muscles are moving in a way she isn’t used to. Kit has to move with more ease but with just as much power as figure skating. It was still skating after all.

Jade keeps whipping around her in circles, stealing puck after puck from her. It was maddening losing like this, a feeling she wasn’t used to but if she had to lose at least she had a good view and a worthy opponent.

Kit goes for it and finally manages to snatch the puck from Jade’s expert hands. Speeding over to the goal where Jade is already blocking to defend. Jade must not be expecting Kit to hit it that hard but she knows she can make this goal.

She slams the puck toward the imaginary goal. It’s airborne, except instead of the goal it’s heading straight for Jade’s head. Before Kit can warn her and before Jade can move, it hits her on the forehead, knocking Jade down. Blood is dripping down Jade’s hand and onto the previously pristine ice.

“Oh fuck, Jade!” Skating over to her immediately. Kit’s hands go straight to Jade’s head checking where the blood was coming from and if she’s able to move.

Fuck, fuck, fuck!

Of course this was happening.
________________

Kit is sulking in the hospital waiting room, slouching in the most uncomfortable chair known to man. Slouching in a way that Sorsha Tanthalos would scold her for if she were here. Allagash is on his phone next to her giving her mom an update on what’s happening with Jade. They still haven’t heard anything since she went in the back and it’s starting to scare her.

The previous events replayed in her mind. There was a lot of blood. She could’ve killed her.

Although Jade did get right back up and acted like it was no big deal. Allagash and her mom insisted they bring her into the hospital just to be safe.

Suddenly she sees Jade being wheeled out into the waiting area and practically sprints over.

Jade is slouched over in the chair. She has so much gauze taped around her head that she can barely see her beautiful face. The only portion of skin she can see is her closed right eye and freckled cheek.

Oh fuck, what happened between now and when she hit her with the puck? She seemed okay, she was talking, she wasn’t dizzy or nauseous. Maybe she had a delayed response to the hit?

The nurse rolls her closer and looks extra annoyed.

“Jade, shit I’m so sorry!” Kit exclaims and crouches down beside the chair. Squinting to see her one eye half closed, the other covered by the gauze.

“That looks bad, what the hell happened after you got taken back there?”

Again, the nurse rolls her eyes and sighs.

Why isn’t Jade talking? Kit looks up at the nurse for answers, eyes pleading for an explanation and starts to ask her the twenty questions about Jade's condition that’s been plaguing her for the last hour.

Did she get stitches? Did she get an x-ray? Does she need any medications? Can she walk? Can she still skate? How long will it be until she can skate again?

While the nurse starts answering the first couple of questions, Kit hears Jade’s muffled laughter as she pulls off the multiple layers of bandages, revealing a cut on her lower forehead with some bruising at the top of her nose.

The nurse’s odd behavior and Jade’s laughter all made perfect sense now.

Kit was furious.This is the kind of joke Airk or herself might pull but she was not expecting Jade to do something like this at all. A plethora of emotions flitted across her face.

She was really worried about her and being back in a hospital after she also fell was only slightly triggering. Mostly she was just worried about Jade’s wellbeing and deep down knows Jade was only trying to make light of this whole situation. Kit guessed she probably felt bad for even getting her involved in the impulsive hockey match.

“Kit, I’m fine. I told you it wasn’t that bad, it happens all the time during games!” Jade continues to chuckle at Kit’s wide eyes, clearly not taking her joke well.

Kit scowls and looks up at the nurse who shrugs timidly. Her hands tense into hard fists and if she doesn’t walk away soon she’ll say something she’ll regret. Kit storms down the fluorescent bulb lined hallway and hears Allagash behind her greeting Jade in triumph that she’s still alive.

She’s not even mad anymore now that the initial shock is over and she knows Jade is okay but something about her is getting under her skin and she can’t place the feeling yet. All these feelings are flooding into her and it’s too much to handle at the moment.

They spend the next couple of days resting at the house. Allagash is out of town and her mom is busy planning the countless holiday events later this year. There’s so much that goes into those events she has to start the planning process six months in advance or all the best vendors will get snatched up by some other rich family. She never liked those holiday parties, always too stuffy and fake.

Although this year might be a bit better if Jade were there. There would be someone to talk to besides Airk and his new girlfriend of the week. Hell, maybe if she and Jade are friends by then she could steal a dance with her. These thoughts only spiral into unrealistic scenarios that never happen the way she wants them to but it’s hard to push aside visions of beautiful honey eyes and her arms laced around her waist.

It’s only been twenty four hours since she checked on Jade but this time Kit decides to go over to her place instead of asking in a text. She squeezes her feet into some sturdy snow boots, grabs a pair of worn-in jeans to wear over her leggings and her favorite adidas hoodie. Almost forgetting her coat, she rushes toward the backyard guest house.

________________

Jade lounges on the couch with an ice pack on her nose. She’s been ruminating all day about the prank she pulled on Kit at the hospital. Kit is always so uptight and disgruntled, she thought it would be funny to pull a tiny joke. Jade realized as soon as she saw Kit’s fiery eyes it was the completely wrong thing to do. It honestly seemed like something Kit and her brother would try and do from the stories Allagash had mentioned to her during practice.

Admittedly, her sense of humor has become warped over the last couple of years. Between Scorpia and Borman’s morbid jokes and the kids at the rink horsing around on the ice, she lost sight of others' sense of humor all together. She’s usually more observant and intuitive but she’s especially thrown off lately in this new environment.

Plus, she’s still getting to know Kit and everything that makes her tick. She’s definitely gaining some insight into her likes and dislikes — what loosens her up and what makes her instantly freeze up. Kit’s feelings were like deep canyons she couldn’t leap into, not yet. But there are ledges she can step on and tiny crevices to crawl in between. She can start there for now. Hopefully she’ll start to hear more than faint echoes as time moves forward.

So far she’s gathered the following intel on Kit Tanthalos:

1. Kit is not organized whatsoever and for a professional skater this was shocking. All her gear is haphazardly thrown around in her bag and around the rink. She can only imagine what her bedroom looks like.

2. Kit is impulsive and always up for trying new things.

3. Every time someone mentions her father or anything regarding her family she shuts herself off and immediately tries changing the subject or she just leaves the vicinity. Her demeanor changes in an instant.

A light knock interrupts her Kit filled thoughts.

Glancing out the window and squinting to see who’s there —- it’s Kit. It’s as if she’s manifested Kit’s presence. Jade bites her chapped bottom lip and pauses before opening the door.

“Hey, Kit. What’s up?” Jade asks.

“Hey, are you doing okay? You’re looking a bit better today.”

“Yeah, I’m much better. The doctor cleared me for training” Jade assures Kit.

“Um, do you actually have a minute? I wanted to go over some things before our first practice back tomorrow.”

Trying not to immediately burst out and apologize for her stupid joke the other day, she holds back and waits for Kit to continue. Patience was something she was pretty good at except when she felt awful about a situation.

Kit was in her street clothes — a loose pair of jeans and an oversized hoodie, holding her coat. The hair across her face was slightly damp from a recent shower. It’s perfectly disheveled and handsome and she has to hold back from moving a strand out of her eyes.

“So um, I don’t mean to freak you out but our senior pair test is in two weeks. If we don’t pass, we don’t compete at regionals.” Kit explains. “And if we don’t get to regionals, we don’t get to sectionals or nationals. Let alone the olympics!”

“Yeah okay, Kit. I know all of that.” Jade says, her accent getting thicker when she’s annoyed.

“I’m trying, ok?’ Jade offers in return. “So, what do we do?”

“I don’t know, it’s instinctive. Once you know the choreography, it's just a matter of anticipating what the other person is going to do without them having to say anything. It’s like having really amazing se-” Kit is cut off from finishing her last word.

“Yeah, allright Kit I get it.” Jade interrupts with a slight blush to her cheeks.

Kit is looking down all of a sudden, she looks so small and shy and Jade can’t place why when she’s not the one that should feel that way. Jade is the one that screwed up the other day. Maybe Kit isn’t even thinking about that anymore and she’s ruminating too much on this whole ordeal.

“Look I — I really wanna show you something. Can you come with me?” Kit asks. “You’ll need a coat and gloves.”

Jade’s eyes squint at the short brunette and replies with a curt nod. Gosh she hopes Kit can’t tell she has a hundred butterflies in her stomach. Their little side quests that aren’t practice related are becoming more and more like a friendship.The type of friendship Jade has yearned for lately. Although this friendship has something else surrounding it that feels vibrant and electric. It feels like they’re in a bubble all to themselves.

She grabs her coat, hat and gloves and smiles as she closes the door behind them.

Stepping out into the cold night air feels like the start of something new and brilliant.

Almost as brilliant as the stars sparkling in the sky above them.

Chapter Text

The sky is a crisp midnight blue with a thousand stars speckled across it. The lack of light pollution makes everything look crystal clear. Jade rips her gaze away from the sky and jogs to catch up to Kit. They head over to a trail Kit is clearly familiar with as she confidently leads the way. The only sounds are an occasional owl hoot and their boots crunching in the wet snow. Jade shivers in the near freezing temperature and it’s so cold out now that their breath lingers in the air like a dampened smoke signal.

They don’t say much on the walk to a secret place Jade is dying to know about, but it isn’t an awkward silence. It was a welcome, comfortable silence – one that warms and calms her nerves.

But their arms and hands keep brushing against each other and it springs adolescent nerves to life from surging hormones she thought were lost in her youth. A crush that you suddenly and secretly always want to be around. When a sweet brush of knuckles makes you feel alive. Jade can’t help but notice how neither of them put more distance in between themselves.

Kit makes her feel every fleeting emotion at the same time and it aches in the most satisfying way.

In a different scenario, where she isn’t trying to stay professional, she’d reach out and hold the cute brunette’s hand walking beside her. She’d intertwine and reassuringly squeeze Kit’s fingers and hope she would squeeze back. She might even pull her body into hers until their breath mingles, keeping her lips warm as she leans in for a kiss that would surely warm her whole body up in the cold surrounding them. She internally shakes the silly fantasies out of her head and concentrates on the trail ahead.

They push through a deep set of bushes and stumble onto a snow covered field with a huge outdoor rink. Pine trees line the other side of the field, dusted in a recent snowfall. Everything looks serene and still in the darkness.

“Look familiar?” Kit smiles and quirks her eyebrow towards the rink but always keeps eye contact with Jade.

Jade smiles and shakes her head in disbelief.

It’s where they first met. How could she ever forget that fateful encounter? An encounter that makes her believe in all those stories about being in the right place at the right time. A vision of serendipity, revoking the cynics of coincidences.

She didn’t realize how close it was to the house. When she first got to the area, everything kind of looked the same and since she had a driver, she didn’t pay attention to how she got to the destinations.

“Yeah, this might look familiar to me.” Jade replies, a smile teasing the corners of her lips.

“My dad used to bring Airk and I out here when we were kids. Skating was a family event, even my mom joined us occasionally. Now I come out here to feel…something. A connection to my dad, I guess.”

Now she understands the intentions of this impromptu hike —- Kit is sharing a part of herself with Jade, a part she rarely shows anyone else. Damn, this woman is brave — showing your most vulnerable bits with someone takes courage and displays a level of risk with your heart Jade knows all too well.

“Well, how about you show me this place through your eyes then?” Jade requests, her voice gentle and quiet, waiting for Kit to take the lead again.

Kit looks over at her as if she’s making a complex move on a chessboard but it’s gone as soon as she’s made up her mind. She turns so she's fully facing her and grabs her glove covered hand with a tight pull towards the rink. The pull of her hand also tugs at her heart, every heartbeat hammering up against her ribcage in anticipation.

Wait, she didn’t mean actually show her the rink, there had to be cameras or some type of security around, right?

“Kit, what are you doing? It’s clearly closed.”

Kit’s approaching the rink like she’s done this a hundred times already.

“Relax, you can still go on the ice. There’s no one guarding it or anything.” Kit replies, confirming Jade’s suspicions. “I know we don’t have our skates, but I thought we could still enjoy the scenery?”

Kit extends her hand out to Jade again and she takes it without hesitation. She trusted Kit faster than anyone else in her life and Kit seems to be returning that trust.

The moonlight and stars were the only source of light in an otherwise pitch black area around the rink. She briefly worries about wolves, causing her to glance around for any sense of life forms but the forest appears frozen in time. It reminds Jade of a scene in a documentary she watched once where someone painstakingly takes tweezers to build the perfect portrait inside of a mini snow globe.

A perfect snapshot of a perfect, magical memory that lingers once shaken.

They slip and slide a bit until they get to the middle with their hands still grasped tightly. The warmth from her hand is radiating up her arm as if someone is grazing a warm cloth across it. The snow covered ice makes traction only slightly easier, it was a light dusting but enough that their tracks were visible. She squeezes her hand to keep each other balanced in the middle of the rink. Kit is looking up at the sky and Jade’s breath catches in her throat at the sight of Kit’s profile in this lighting. Her eyes sparkle under the stars as the moonlight dances around the edge of her razor jawline like one of those Renaissance paintings with beautiful shadows and light creating the most dynamic contrast Jade has ever seen.

“So what do you think of this place at night?” Kit asks, still looking up at the stars then turns to catch Jade blatantly staring at her. Jade doesn’t care, she’s mesmerized.

Jade remembers how to breathe again and slowly exhales, searching for an answer.

“I think it’s beautiful and peaceful.” Jade thoughtfully replies. “It’s so clear out here, I can even make out a few constellations, if not more. Pegasus is right over there and it’s directly attached to the Andromeda constellation. And Cepheus and Cassiopeia, the King and Queen of the sky.” Jade realizes she’s rambling but can’t seem to stop herself.

“How do you know so much about stars and constellations?” Kit asks, clearly impressed.

“When I was really little, I used to stay up and count them before I fell asleep.” She pauses and continues.

If Kit was brave, Jade could be too.

“It’s one of the only memories I have with my parents. It’s hazy, but I remember camping in a tent with them and my mum would guide my hands to show me all the different constellations.” Jade smiles at the memory. “Shortly after that they got into an accident and after getting out of the foster system I’ve been with my sister ever since.”

Jade keeps her eyes closed tight as she wipes away a warm tear she didn’t realize had fallen. A warm hand is suddenly on her shoulder, she looks over and follows the sensation as it slides down her arm. Her eyes meet sparkling blue orbs and she doesn’t know what to say so they continue a silent conversation. Before Jade realizes it she’s leaning into Kit’s orbit, her face mere inches from hers. She doesn’t know what her goal is here — does she want to kiss her or just be closer? Before she has time to figure it out, Kit’s grip tightens on her arm as she slips and takes Jade down onto the hard, cold ice.

Kit lands half on top of Jade, her arms on either side of her shoulders. Her eyes linger over Jade’s face and she sees fear, only for a second but it’s there. Was she scared of the fall or maybe she was scared of how close they were to kissing? Either way, Jade’s mind is swirling with scenarios but before she can panic too much Kit is laughing above her.

It’s contagious and Jade can’t help but laugh too.

“I’m sorry about that, I didn’t mean to take you down with me.” Kit apologizes.

Jade rolls her eyes and smiles up at her. She makes another mental note that Kit isn’t pulling away immediately and cages it deep in her memory for when she’s alone later.

“Oh I’m sure! I tell you a deep tragic story about my life and you go and interrupt it by falling.” Jade jests to distract from the sudden mood change. “You’d think an Olympic figure skater would have better balance?”

Kit pushes off of the ice and helps Jade up in the process of gaining some equilibrium back.

“Hey, I have great balance! I was just thrown off, that's all.” Kit says.

Jade hums in reply with a smirk.

“We should probably head back. Wouldn’t want to be late to practice.” Kit suggests and Jade's stomach drops. She doesn’t want this night to end just yet but she knows Kit is right.

“All right, lead the way, Princess.”

They make small talk back to the house about practice, their strict diet and training progression. All topics that Jade could critique for days with Kit and it doesn’t feel like work. Kit loves skating just as much as she does and it feels amazing to be able to nerd out with someone about it. Seeing Kit’s eyes light up about a lift they mastered recently makes Jade’s admiration for this woman even more intense.

But all good conversations must come to an end as they approach Jade’s door.

“I better get some sleep before practice tomorrow.” Kit says but lingers a bit, she looks almost nervous.

This is a new side of Kit she’s discovering. She looks so small looking down, kicking the snow around like she was waiting for someone to tell her what to do next. Her coat is comically puffy and long, one of those extremely expensive down coats you get for extreme blizzards. It’s adorable. It’s especially adorable that Kit has her hands in her pockets. The navy blue coat swallows her up in the dark surrounding them.

“Guess I’ll see you tomorrow?” Jade continues the slow goodbye.

Kit starts to turn and walk away and before Jade knows it she reaches out to grab her wrist.

“Hold on, Kit.”

Jade moves closer, her fingers still loosely around Kit’s slim wrist.

She brings her hands down to the bottom of Kit’s ridiculously long coat.

Kit’s eyes bulge at her sudden close proximity and ultimately settle into a quizzical brow. Jade’s heartbeat is hammering against her chest and wonders if Kit can tell that she doesn’t know what she’s doing either.

Her body is acting before thinking, just trying to keep Kit close.

Jade slowly starts to zip Kit’s coat, the jagged teeth close one by one. It envelopes her body heat and as the last teeth close on the chain, Jade lingers her hand on the smooth pull tab. Her eyes meet darkened blue ones and time stands still for what feels like minutes instead of seconds. Jade watches Kit’s gaze travel down, she swears they stay on her lips before looking down at Jade’s fingers still fiddling with the tab almost grazing Kit’s pointed jaw.

Jade doesn’t know what her next move is but she knows what her body is longing to do. Her body wants to lean forward, take Kit’s chiseled face and pull her into a searing kiss. She wants to pull her through the door behind them and peel each article of clothing off of her instead of zipping her into more layers. She wants to drag her own teeth down Kit’s body while her fingers slide along her milky smooth skin. She wants to keep Kit warm tonight instead of that monstrous, overpriced piece of clothing.

But she clears her throat and backs away instead. Her head wins this battle.

“Don’t want you to get cold on your way back to the house.” Jade says.

Kit looks like she’s in shock but nods her head as her lips creep into a soft smile.

“Goodnight, Jade.” Kit says softly. “And thanks for coming with me tonight, it means a lot to me.”

“Of course, me too.” Jade answers.

In the deep crevices of Jade’s mind, she thinks and hopes there is a flicker of more than friendship in the future.
________________

The last couple weeks with Jade have felt exhilarating, but who knew performance music could be so difficult to agree on. Her past skating partners never really cared what songs her and her mom would choose but Jade had some strong opinions.

Kit caved quite a bit when her mom insisted on a classic Beethoven piece but lately Kit was trying to convince her to go contemporary. It was sort of working — her latest rebuttal was it would help Jade hear their cues better if they had something upbeat and that had words.

Apparently that argument gave them this stack of CD’s piled on the floor in front of them. None of them were from the last decade or even last two decades but it was progress.
They were on their last disc of songs and Kit has to admit that Jade has impressive taste in music — it only made her that much more ridiculously attracted to her. They decided on a short classical piece from a movie score to appease the judges and Sorsha’s traditional taste. The long program is what they were the most excited about — mainly because it was a song they both agreed they could listen to on repeat during rehearsals and thought it wouldn’t drive them completely insane after the hundredth time.

“We’ve gotta play this straight for the short program so the judges don’t hate our other one.” Kit explains the stuffy and traditional skating rules she’s learned throughout the years.

“Straight, huh?” Jade questions Kit’s choice of words with an amused smirk.

“You know what I meant.” Kit continues to chuckle and roll her eyes, not meeting Jade’s in her peripheral vision.

“It suits you, you know?” Jade says while nudging Kit’s shoulder.

“What does?” Kit asks as she finally looks over at Jade, meeting those irises and freckles she could stare at for hours.

That gravitational pull is getting harder to ignore and she does her best to push it down.

“Smiling,” Jade smiles and continues to tease her. “It’s a rare occurrence from what I’ve seen.”

Can’t seem to help it when I’m around you lately.

They’re sitting so close their hands are almost touching on the carpet below. Kit glances for a split second at Jade’s lips then right back up to her eyes. There’s always a charged feeling in the air when they are this close. Kit finds it increasingly distracting.

She shakes her head of that thought and scrambles up from the floor.

“Wanna see what else makes me smile?” Kit asks as she raises an eyebrow and extends her hand out to Jade.

Jade slides her hand into Kits and pulls her up. Kit tries her best to ignore the tingling when their skin touches.

“I’d like that, princess.” She smirks and they pull away after a few more seconds when they realize they’re still holding hands.

“Uh, you know I’m not really a princess, right?”

“Yeah, but deep down I think you kinda like it.” Jade teases and bumps her shoulder into Kits.

Kit only admits to herself that Jade’s nickname for her makes her stomach do somersaults. The feeling reminds her of when she forgets to keep a focal point during spins and her stomach is jumbled while the world around her gets hazy. She’s a grown woman and yet when she’s around Jade she feels like a giddy teenager. This is not good, she needs to stay professional but it feels like she’s known Jade her whole life and that scares the shit out of her.

After a brief walk of comfortable silence to the stables out back, they’ve reached their destination.

“Eclipse, meet Jade. Jade, this is Eclipse.” Kit gestures to a beautiful white horse.

Jade approaches Eclipse and pets her softly with a wide smile.

“And this is Whisper. Whisper’s been through a lot in the past but they’re super sweet, especially when you give them some apples as a treat.” Kit shares and lovingly pets the horse between their ears.

“They’re beautiful horses. Do you ride?” Jade nods over at them and asks with genuine curiosity.

“No Jade, I just brush them all day long.” Kit says teasingly.

“Yes, it’s one of my favorite things to do. To ride off and feel like nothing can stop me from exploring. To enjoy the land and just…relax.”

Jade hums softly in understanding and watches Kit’s eyes look off into the distance like she forgets she’s there for a second.

“Wanna help brush them and then maybe we can take them out for a lap?” Kit asks.

Instinctively moving around each other, they work in a comfortable silence. Methodically brushing each horse, they get them ready to explore on their adventure.

Kit peaks her head over Eclipse to capture Jade’s attention with an ecstatic smile.

“So, you wanna race?”

Intrigued honey brown eyes meet mischievous blue ones.

“You’re so on.” Jade laughs and throws down the brush, finishing the buckles on the saddle.

Kit loves the feeling of making Jade laugh. This whole day has been one of her favorite days in a long time. This is exactly what they needed and Kit feels like a dick for keeping her distance at first. She’s trying to not beat herself up over instinctively protecting her heart but all she can do now is show Jade she wants to get to know her too.

In the far crevices of Kit’s mind, she admits to herself that it’s more than friendship she seeks.
________________

They race through the trails and stop on a cliff not too far from the house. It’s more of a bluff than a cliff but still tall enough to view the start of a gorgeous dusky pink sunset. It's been years since Jade had been on a horse. She took some lessons once with Scorpia and they both picked it up surprisingly fast. Jade fell in love with the amazing resilience and beauty the horses displayed. It felt good to be back on a horse as beautiful as Whisper and even better to be here with Kit.

Kit was extremely fortunate to grow up with her own horse and this scenery as her back yard. She could tell Kit was semi aware of her privilege. Behind all the entitled confidence was a woman stuck in her circumstances and not willing to break free. She’s accepted her duty to be a perfect daughter, skater and whatever else was expected of her. Maybe Jade really could help her. Help her win, yes, but maybe heal a bit of that broken heart she tries so hard not to put on display.

“This used to be me and my dad’s spot.” Kit suddenly says aloud. “We'd come here and talk about life, skating, and if anything was bothering me.”

Kit trails off and it’s almost as if she forgets Jade is there but she lets her have a moment before speaking.

“Kit, what —- um, what happened to your dad?” Jade carefully asks.

Kit’s eyes peer over at Jade, as if she knew that question was coming.

It’s something that Jade has wanted to ask since she arrived here but never wanted to pry. Always letting Kit take the lead in their conversations. Jade tried joking and chatting with her but Kit kept it formal between them after practices. Kit was probably used to doing that with her other partners but Jade could tell that she had an affect on her. That having Jade as a skating partner was not only breaking boundaries in the skating world but in Kit’s personal world, as well.

Kit takes a large breath and begins her story.

“My dad always liked to go on these huge adventures — long, arduous hikes and he’d be gone for days sometimes.” Kit pauses then continues, “Most of the time he had friends that went with him, even Allagash went a couple of times, but the last time he wanted to go alone. He said he wanted to try and survive with minimal gear or something he saw on some stupid show probably.”

Kit starts to tear up, taking another breath and sucking down the tears with it.

“When he didn’t come back after a few days, my mom called the search and rescue service but they couldn’t find him. Not a single trace, actually. It’s like he vanished into another dimension.”

“Kit, I’m so sorry. That must’ve been horrible to go through.” Jade tries to console but knows there’s nothing she could say to make it better or even try to understand the trauma this loss put her family through.

“It was a long time ago,” Kit shrugs the memories off. “All I can do now is try to make him proud.”

Jade’s heart breaks into a million pieces because she knows what losing a parent feels like and there isn’t anything that makes the raw ache go away completely.

Kit was slowly but surely breaking herself open in front of Jade and it meant a lot to her. It explains her walls constantly being up, always defending against intruders and built like battlements but she was slowly retreating and letting people in. She’s letting Jade in.

The rapidly setting sun casts a shadow over Kit’’s flushed face and stops her breath for a moment.

“C’mon, I’ll race ya back!” Kit yells and turns her horse around, galloping out of sight into some trees where the trail veers off. Jade softly sighs, turns around and goes after Kit — always trying to keep up with her.
________________

The hardest part about leaving Jade at the end of their hang outs was saying goodbye. Her heart ached and she immediately missed her presence, her laugh, her beautiful freckled face. It took everything in her to not text her after getting back to her room and ask what she was up to or what she really thought of a stupid video she showed her earlier. She was trying to keep an invisible line drawn between them but even lines that exist in your head can vanish.

Just as they were about to part ways, Jade asks Kit an unexpected and welcome question.

“Do you wanna come in? I’ve got some snacks and we could just chill out?”

“Yeah, uh, I’d really like that actually.” Kit answers and steps into Jade’s space. She still has her bag from practice earlier and throws it on the floor next to Jade’s.

The guest house always felt like Kit had to avoid it after her dad disappeared. Her and Airk would run off to it when they wanted to escape and their dad would always find them playing some silly board game. Most times he’d join them and they’d roast s'mores in the small fireplace in the cozy living room. Those memories are flooding back and it hits differently now than it previously did when she thought about her father. It feels like she’s more at peace with her happy moments with him, instead of harboring the bitterness that she’ll never have them again.

Having Jade here has opened this place back up to her. It’s warm again with Jade living here. Jade is warmth and light and she wants to bask in it as much as she can if she’ll let her.

They find a random bottle of wine and decide to go for it. With snacks and their glasses of wine, they settle into a comfortable conversation snuggled up on the sofa and Kit feels so content. It’s nice having a friend to hang out with —- it feels so easy with Jade now that she was letting her guard down.

She thought she was being brave by keeping her walls up but she’s slowly realizing the courageous thing to do is to stand down, open up and be vulnerable.

“Right, I propose we play a game.” Jade says. “I mean, games are your specialty after all, yeah?”

“Okay, what do you have in mind?” Kit asks warily.

“Never have I ever?” Jade suggests.

“I think I can handle that one.” Kit agrees. Although she doesn't think this “game” requires that much strategy. She's actually never had the opportunity to play these drinking games. She was always busy with practice, or formal events that didn’t have the crowd that would play these types of games. Challenge accepted.

Jade goes first and Kit is instantly proved wrong about it requiring strategy.

“I’ve never figure skated at the Olympics.”

“Hey, that’s too easy!” Kit bursts out. “And you haven’t done that yet.”

“Wow!” Jade pauses a second and then softly replies, “You really think we can do it?”

“Yeah, I really do. I think if we keep progressing and win all these upcoming competitions then we really do have a chance.” Kit is confident and she needs Jade to share this confidence with her. Jade smiles and nods and it’s a good enough reply.

“My turn!” Kit yells. “Never have I ever…” She smiles like the devil and continues, “...played hockey at the Olympics!”

They both erupt in laughter as Jade takes a drink in defeat.

Kit hasn’t laughed this much in a long time. It felt nice, like a release.

“Never have I ever…hmmm.” Jade gets serious suddenly. “Never have I ever been truly in love with someone.”

Kit pauses in slight shock. How has this gorgeous human being never been in love? Not ever? How is this possible? Then Kit realizes she hasn’t taken a drink either. Here she is questioning Jade’s love life when she hasn’t had much of one herself.

“You either?” Jade asks Kit and she feels like she needs to explain.

“Yeah well, when you spend all your time dedicated to your work, it doesn’t allow much dating time. But I have been with other women, it just never progressed into anything too serious.” Kit explains.

“Yeah I get that. I mean I think I started falling for a couple of women but I feel like life always got in the way. No matter how much I wanted it or wanted to make it work…it just didn’t.” Jade divulges and shrugs.

They continue playing until the wine is gone and the fire is almost out. Kit yawns and it immediately makes Jade do the same.

“Tired, Princess?” Jade half whispers.

Kit nods and yawns again. She scoots all the way into Jade’s side and lays her head on her strong shoulder. She wants to be closer, warmer and settles for wrapping her arms around Jade’s arm, feeling Jade tense at the forward physical contact but immediately melts into it as Kit sighs and closes her eyes. She feels safe with Jade’s deep steady breaths comforting her nervous system and before she can say her final goodnight, she drifts off to sleep.
________________

The morning arrives too soon for Jade’s liking and there is an insistent banging sound outside. What in the world was going on? She gasps at the sight of Kit curled up next to her completely passed out despite the racket right outside her door. The reality of the current situation is crashing down around her like a meteor shower entering the Earth’s atmosphere.

“Jade! Is Kit in there with you? You’re both late for practice and you’re lucky it’s me out here and not Sorsha!” Allagash yells as he continuously bangs on the door.

Oh shit, they overslept. They overslept together. Kit spent the night. Granted it was unintentional but still she spent the night curled into Jade’s side and she wishes she had more time to enjoy it but her sense of duty overpowers her fantasies — she has to wake up Kit.

“Kit…Kit, wake up.” Jade nudges Kit and apparently it takes physical touch to rouse her from her deep sleep rather than noise. Noted. Allagash must have given up, because the banging has thankfully stopped.

“Jade? What time is it?” Kit says groggily and half asleep still.

“Kit, we overslept. We have to get to the rink now.”

“Oh, fuck!” Kit says. She sits straight up, fully awake now.

“My reaction exactly. Now let’s go!” Jade says but can’t help giggling as Kit stumbles up from the couch.

It feels silly, childlike in a way, like they’ve woken up late for school and need to catch the bus. Jade thinks they would’ve been friends in school. Maybe even best friends. Maybe even…but before she can finish that thought she’s being pushed out the door and running. Kit has both their bags as she sprints ahead. She knows this is childish but they can’t stop laughing as they head to practice.

The sun is shining bright today. It’s almost blinding when it hits the snow drifts at the right angles. Not as blinding as Kit’s blue eyes sparkling with joy and excitement as she looks back at Jade.

Today’s practice is going to be one for the books.

Chapter Text

The pressure is piling on brick by brick and they have to be ready for Nationals soon. It’s a constant cloud looming over everyone’s head, but especially Kit’s — a true test on if the Olympics were even in their future. And she knows it’s because the stakes are higher this time. It feels so final, like it might be the last time she can make this dream come true.

The dream of whom she’s not even sure anymore.

Growing up in the Tanthalos family, she’s used to the pressure, but this time feels so different than the previous games. It’s different because of her partner. Her beautiful, infuriatingly almost perfect partner. Her partner that haunts her dreams in the best way possible.

The night after she accidentally stayed at Jade’s, she couldn’t help but think of warm brown eyes underneath her own as she traced each freckle on her face. Her fantasies of Jade’s slightly parted lips, releasing tiny whimpers and moans from Kit’s touch. The all consuming thoughts made her edge herself three separate times before she came thrusting against her warm hand, wishing it was Jade’s fingers instead.

The next few mornings, Kit pushes the fiery redhead thoughts from her mind.

Right before practice today, her mother pulled Kit into her office to go over a few business points. It was all a ploy though. Airk was already seated in front of her desk, slouched and clearly not enjoying this sporadic family meeting. Kit ruffles his long wavy hair as she sits in the other chair next to him. Shedding off her coat in the warm office provided some nervous relief but she still didn’t like the tense energy in the near dark room. The shutters around the windows provided a minuscule amount of natural light, reminding her that winter was truly here if the sun hadn’t risen yet.

“Ya know, I told Airk that Elora would only complicate things around here but he didn’t listen to me.” Kit jests to break the tense mood her mother was in today. It didn’t work.

“Kit, please, this is no time to joke.” Sorsha reprimands her, taking a sip of her steaming hot tea.

Kit feels her eyes roll involuntarily as she waits for her mother to continue whatever it is she was going to say. This is a waste of time, Jade was waiting out in the rink already and she still needed to do a quick off ice warm up. She was extra antsy to get out there and release some pent up stress.

“Now, as both of you know we are meeting with the Hasturs soon to go over competition logistics after the holidays are over.”

Kit and Airk nod like they’ve heard this ten times already, because they have and will continue to get updated schedules from her until the day she dies. Kit sighs in exhaustion at the repetitiveness of it all.

“I know you will both be on your best behavior at the party and at the meetings.” Sorsha pauses and takes a small sip of her tea while keeping eye contact with both of them. “I will not be made a fool. We need this alliance to keep our sponsorships in place.”

“Great mom, got it. Keep the Hasturs happy, don’t make a fool of ourselves —” Airk starts to get up and Kit follows his lead. “Are we good here?”

“Not so fast you two!” Sorsha raises her voice just enough to make them freeze and sit back down.

That demanding tone is not a good sign. Is her mother actively trying to ruin her practice today? Because the way this is going, she’s going to need a minute to gather her concentration.

“Mom, I’m already late for practice, can’t this wait?” Kit tries to deflect the conversation. If it can be called that.

“Have you both been too busy to remember what today is?” Sorsha asks, appalled at the notion.

Kit takes a slight glance at her phone. Fuck, it’s today. The day her dad went missing. The day their family changed forever. Of course she was aware of the date but if she was being honest with herself she was pushing it out of her mind to the point where looking at a calendar or even her phone became hard. Taking a second to find her words, Airk jumps in with an apology.

“Of course we do, of course we remember. But we’ve been so focused on skating and getting us sponsorship deals, time seems to be non-existent lately.”

“And it’s not like we ever do anything to truly honor him. So don’t act like this year will be any different than last year. What, we have a family dinner with a place set for him like he’s coming back when he’s never returning? Yeah, because that’s healthy.” Kit lashes out, breathing heavily and stares at her mom with disdain.

“Kit, that’s enough! I’m doing my best —”

“No, I can’t do this right now. I’m late and Jade is waiting for me.”

Kit storms out of the wood paneled office and practically runs to practice. Tears are on the verge of falling but she blinks them back as the air gets colder the closer she gets to the rink. She feels bad leaving Airk there to fend for himself but she needs to be away from that room. From the reminder of a mom that’s not trying hard enough. From the reminder that her dad is never coming back.

It’s time to focus on what she’s good at and honor her dad today in the only way she knows how, by skating with the dedication he taught her every day.

It’s time to practice.

Despite how cold it’s been, the rink feels claustrophobically stuffy today.

Jade’s fingers feel warm and strong in hers and it’s the only thing steadying her at the moment. And yet every time they’d try a lift or her hands gripped her waist she’d tense up. She had to actively shut off her thoughts to get through it.

And just as Jade attempted to lift Kit above her head she froze at the awkward angle and had to stop it mid-air, causing Jade to switch her grip and let Kit down with a sharp dig into the ice with her skates. Kit didn’t fall, thankfully. She never fell with Jade. And for some reason it pissed her off even more.

Why did she have to always be so attentive towards her? She didn’t deserve it.

“What the fuck, Jade! I thought we had this down?” Kit yells, her hands on her hips in frustration.

She yells at Jade knowing it should actually be at herself.

“Well we did until you decided to add an extra move and it’s throwing us all off now.”

“That wasn’t me, that was Elora’s new choreography!” Kit blames and gestures to their new observer.

“That you agreed to change and didn’t even ask if it was something I was comfortable doin'.” Jade replies incredulously.

Kit crosses her arms, defiant in admitting defeat. She just figured Jade’s silence was in agreement not objection.

Jade’s nose is all scrunched up and seeing her all frustrated makes her sparkling eyes even more irresistible to look at — it makes the anger dissipate but it only lasts a few seconds before she feels like she needs a break. Some distance might be good before she continues saying things she regrets.

“Let’s just take a little breather. I need some water.” Kit suggests and glides off toward the edge of the rink.

The past few competitions have gone great, but Kit thought they could up the difficulty and change the choreography a bit. So they brought in reinforcements — Elora Danan. Elora just happened to be Airk’s girlfriend, although Kit could see the relationship was fading already. Still, she was an up and coming talent in the industry Kit couldn’t ignore.

Kit overhears Allagash and Elora talking about her and Jade’s dynamic while cooling off. She nonchalantly acts like she’s not listening to every word.

“Do they always bicker like that?” Elora asks.

“Yeah I’d say about once per practice on average.” Allagash replies matter of factly. “I’ve found it to have a lot of bark but no bite – they usually only do this during practice. And if you ask me, I think they kind of like it.”

“Huh.” Elora adds, seemingly intrigued by her coach’s words.

Kit knows Elora is going to corner her at the party next week over this whole situation.

Her and Jade are currently ignoring the tension between them and with that blissful ignorance comes fighting during practice.

Kit skates back over to Jade. An apology is made and they finish their practice strong and clean.

Before leaving the ice, Jade tugs at Kit’s wrist. Kit turns to see the most soft and earnest eyes searching for understanding in hers.

“Kit, I just want you to keep in mind that I’m never going to let you fall. I’ll always have a strong hold and I can tell when you don’t, okay?” Jade assures, slightly squeezing her wrist to comfort her. “And if we do fall, we fall together.”

“Yeah.” Kit nods with a light smile playing at her lips. Still out of breath, she gently breaks Jade’s hold on her wrist, nods again and points to the benches to signal it’s time to leave.

An understanding passed between them in that moment that continues to freak her out. She can still feel her feather-like grip on her wrist as she unlaces her skates.

As she’s packing up, Airk yells out to Elora making his presence known. He breezes into this place as if today was any other regular day. Like it wasn’t the day their dad went missing. Like she didn’t blow up at their mom earlier that morning.

In Kit’s peripheral vision, she sees Airk jogging over to her next. He joins Kit on the bench and whispers, “So, I heard you were late to practice the other day?” Airk asks cautiously.

That’s what he wants to talk about? She knows this tone. It’s a nosy, prying tone in pursuit of the truth.

“Oh yeah?” Kit nonchalantly crosses her arms. “Why are you asking about that?”

“Well I may have overheard that you were at Jade’s place.” Airk pauses and silently asks if he actually needs to directly ask her what he wants instead of probing his way into it.

Kit won’t let him know that easily and decides to wait until he asks directly. Until then, she’s remaining quiet.

“Oh c’mon, you can tell me!” Airk is getting impatient. “Is something going on with you two?”

That was quick. That’s the question he really wanted to ask. Except she wasn’t sure how to answer –- not that she’d tell him right now anyway.

“No. Jade and I— we’re just friends.” Kit tries to nonchalantly explain. ”Nothing is going on.”

Kit glances over at Jade across the rink, catches her eye and smirks.

“Uh huh. Well as long as you’re sure there.” Airk says skeptically, peeks at Elora and silently nods over to them implying if she’s seeing this exchange too. Elora smiles and mouths hopeless dummies over to Airk.

They know she’s right in front of them and can see everything they’re doing, right? Catching the dramatic exchange between the two most meddlesome people she’s ever known, she can’t help but roll her eyes and walk off, annoyed as ever.

Luckily, Jade didn’t notice, she seemed to just notice Kit’s stare.

“I’ll see you later! We still have to go over that meeting agenda!” Airk yells after her as she walks through the exit.
________________

Jade feels shaky as she approaches Kit’s bedroom door after taking two wrong turns down corridors that lead to nowhere. This house could be turned into a haunted maze for Halloween if they wanted to open it to the public. That thought is quickly followed by the thought of the Tanthalos house already being haunted by past family memories. It’s probably hard walking through halls and corridors traced with memories of past loved ones long gone.

Jade tries to focus on the present time and the literal present in her hand as she stands in front of Kit’s door. It’s just a present. She can do this —- it’ll be easy. Except she’s never been inside of Kit’s room so this feels different, almost like an intrusion.

She takes a deep breath and knocks.

No answer.

She knocks again, a little more forceful than the previous one.

No answer.

She knocks again and waits about twenty seconds. She hears a loud bang and gets worried. What if she fell or dropped something and needed help?

Jade twists the door knob and cautiously enters the room only to find Kit right in front of the window on the other side of the room. She’s drying her hair with her open towel semi-wrapped around herself.

Kit’s head whips around and her eyes widen at Jade’s intrusion.

“Jesus, Jade! Knock much?” Kit yells, haphazardly tugging her towel closer to her very naked and dripping wet body.

“I’m — I’m so sorry, I knocked and didn’t hear anything and then I got a bit worried so I just came in and-“ Jade is rambling and with much restraint looks to the side, anywhere but at Kit.
Anywhere but at the water droplets falling from the ends of her hair down into smooth dark places hidden by the towel. Her focus fixates on the mess that is Kit’s floor instead. Kit really isn’t organized, as Jade suspected.

“Well you can look now.” Kit assures Jade it’s safe to look up and she slowly meets Kit’s stare.

Kit’s eyes are still wide and silently inviting Jade to explain why she’s in her room.

“I — I realized we never got to exchange gifts or anything before I left for Christmas and thought now that we’re back home that I could give you your gift.” Jade explains, fumbling with a neatly wrapped rectangle present. “Better late than never, right?”

Jade is still finding it hard to concentrate on anything but Kit’s roguish wet hair in front of her face while her hand grips tight around the top of the towel so it doesn’t fall off mid movement. Secretly hoping it does fall and she could continue staring at her milky smooth skin.

“What do you get the girl that has everything? But hopefully you like it.” Jade continues her explanation and steps forward with cautious, nervous energy. She hands Kit the gift with a smile. “Merry late Christmas, Kit.”

Kit smiles, filled with excitement at the gesture and takes the package. She unwraps it in a tenth of the time it took her to wrap it. Kit haphazardly throws it on her floor and it automatically makes sense why her room is such a mess. A maid probably comes in and cleans every day until Kit comes back to her room and makes it look like someone actually lives here.

Kit pauses, alarmed at the velvet navy blue box in her hand. As she snaps it open, Jade feels like she might throw up. What if she doesn’t like it? It wasn’t the fanciest piece of jewelry, she knows that but it has sentimental value and would bring out the sparkling blue in her eyes.

It was either this or an old hockey jersey Jade idolized but she thought Kit would appreciate a necklace more than a piece of hockey memorabilia.

“Oh my…Jade this is beautiful. I – I don’t know what to say.” Kit looks up at Jade in soft shock.

Breathing out to settle herself and lean into Kit’s reaction, she steps forward into Kit’s personal space. “Here let me put it on ya, see how it looks.” Jade suggests as she circles around to Kit’s backside and takes the necklace.

It’s quiet and still steamy in the room from Kit’s shower earlier. It’s stifling all coherent thoughts in her brain. She can’t believe Kit is so receptive to this gift in the first place. She gently places the jade stone necklace around Kit’s elegant bare neck.

“My sister gave me this when I was little but it…it never felt like mine.” Jade explains the origins of the present. Her fingers linger at the clasp just a second longer than one should. Jade waits for Kit to pull away, but she stays still until Jade is finished explaining. “And I thought it’d look better on you.”

Kit turns around and the smell of eucalyptus soap wafts through the air between them. Jade’s senses are on overload. She takes in the close up view of the necklace on Kit’s dewy skin.

It’s stunning. Kit is stunning.

“Thank you, it’s gorgeous. Really.” Kit smiles and shifts her gaze behind Jade. Kit reaches behind her and pulls a bag off an ornate wooden dresser.

“Here, I got you something too.” She hands Jade the bag. “Merry late Christmas!”

Jade softly chuckles at the repeated phrase. She takes the present and just stares at it.

Jade looks up to see Kit’s furrowed brow and fidgeting fingers.

“Well, open it, come on!” Kit hurries Jade along.

Jade didn’t mean to pause but she truly didn’t think Kit would even remember to get her anything. She never expected anything in return when she gave gifts to others. This gesture is so thoughtful and it melts Jade’s heart that Kit thought about a gift for her at all.

She hastily reaches into the glitter tissue paper and pulls out a book. It was a copy of The Little Prince. She’d heard of it but never read it. Running her fingers over the delicate discolored cover. This must be an older copy, the pages were worn and darker around the edges as if someone spilled black tea and the paper absorbed some of it.

“It’s a first edition copy of my favorite book.” Kit explains, her voice soft and expression hopeful that Jade will like it.

“Oh wow, Kit…this is too much.” Jade truly doesn’t know what to say.

“Just promise me a full review when you read it.” Kit says with a crooked smirk and Jade nods.

It’s all she can muster at this intimate moment between them.

They both stand there for a few seconds in silence until Jade finally finds her words.

“Right, well I better leave so you can get ready.” Jade starts to walk past Kit and reaches the door when Kit chimes in suddenly.

“See ya at the party, Claymore!”

“Yeah, see ya there.” Jade smiles as she leaves Kit’s room. The breath she was holding is now back in her lungs and she can’t help but feel giddy at what the rest of the night might bring.

She has a party to get ready for and not much time to do it.
________________

It takes Jade significantly longer to get ready than she thought it would for the infamous Tanthalos New Years Eve party. But this wasn’t just any party, it was a social event with skating sponsors, past and current coworkers, and a bunch of friends and family of the Tanthalos’s that she didn’t know at all. The only person at this party she would know even semi-intimately would be Kit.

The velvet green suit jacket and pants combo made for a sleek and still formal style. She added her black lace bodysuit for a bit of sex appeal and fun to the outfit. Since her hair is always in braids or up for practice she decides to wear it down and natural with slightly defined curls on top and down the sides. She loves her curls wild and free of any restriction. Her makeup is kept neutral, freckles peeking through across her face and a mascara-eyeshadow combo that brings out the rich brown hue in her eyes. The inspiration was to mix modern with old Hollywood style.

She’d be lying if she said she didn’t want to impress Kit with her style and ability to work a room.

Jade wasn’t from Kit’s world but she can sure as hell try and fit in for one night. She’s lucky she has some experience talking to rich, entitled people but it was never for a whole night. She always left these events early and this one feels more important. Kit will be there and lately anywhere Kit is, Jade wants to be. Even if she’s in her own personal hell. To be near Kit is worth the atrocious hors d'oeuvres and snide remarks about investments and extravagant European vacations.

The Tanthalos ballroom is filled with twinkle lights and lavishly decorated Christmas trees. One lone Happy New Year sign is hung by the stage where the live band is blasting jazz standards. This is her favorite type of music to dance to if she’s being honest.

The open bar is set up adjacent to the stage and Jade nearly jogs over to it. A bit of alcohol to help loosen up her nerves. She barely takes a sip of her vodka orange press from the bartender before Sorsha is approaching her. Oh no, she looks serious. Should she not be drinking? She could’ve sworn her contract said alcohol was allowed every once in a while just nothing excessive to impede on training. It's too late now. Fuck it. She takes another sip to prepare whatever is about to happen.

“Hello, Jade. I hope you’re having a pleasant time so far.” Sorsha greets her with a wide cheshire grin. Was she…happy?

“Hi, Sorsha. Thanks for inviting me.You did a brilliant job with everything.” Jade feels extra cordial around her tonight.

“Yes, well feel free to have more drinks, dance and enjoy yourself.” Sorsha says. “You’ve been doing amazing work lately. I can see a huge improvement and Kit seems to be working well with you.” There was a suggestive tone in that last bit but Jade just nods in reply and thanks her.

Next thing to do at a party where she knows no one is to find the people she does know.

She stops in her tracks while walking across the dance floor and stares at the fucking gorgeous woman in front of her. It was Kit in a dark green dress with a deep cut v-neck showcasing a familiar jade necklace that matched it perfectly. The dress is skin tight and tapers off at the bottom. She looked uncomfortable tugging at it in places when someone wasn't looking.

But Jade is looking.

She approaches the group Kit is talking to and doesn’t recognize anyone except Sorsha who’s off to the side discussing something with an older man in a tux. Next to him is a younger man that must be his son perhaps?

Kit notices Jade waltz up to them — her eyes widen and subtly flicker over Jade’s outfit. She smiles at her and nods in a silent greeting between them. Jade’s heart skips a beat. Jade feels wanted and can’t distinguish if it’s the alcohol that’s warming her up or Kit’s stare.

“Jade, you made it!” Kit says enthusiastically. “I’d like to introduce you to the Hasturs who are one of the Olympic sponsors for us.”

“Nice to meet you both.” Jade says politely and offers to shake hands. The younger Hastur is the only one who extends his hand and seems pretty genuine. The older Hastur squints like she was a bug to squash but nods to acknowledge her presence at least.

“You’ll have to excuse my father, he’s not great with new people.” He says quietly to just her and Kit. “I’m Graydon.”

“Nice to meet ya, Graydon.”

“Okay well this was fun. Jade, you need a refill on your drink?” Kit gestures for them to leave until Sorsha speaks up.

“Kit, remember your duties tonight.” Sorsha warns her.

Her duties? What kind of duties would Kit have at a party? Jade was allowed to have fun but Kit had duties? If Kit had to work, so did Jade. They were a team —- partners.

“Oh let it be Sorsha, it’s a party. Let them have a little fun and then you can continue planning their impending wedding, yeah?” The older Hastur places light, awkward pats on Kit and Graydon’s shoulders.

Wedding? What the fucking hell did that mean? Since when is Kit engaged?

Jade’s eyes fly to Kit’s, confused over what she just heard. Jade decides to step back and gesture that she needs another drink.

“Jade, wait — let me explain!” She hears Kit discreetly say under her breath. Nope, she can’t do this right now, she has to keep moving.

Kit isn’t behind her anymore and she continues walking to the bar where she clocks Airk. She needs a second to wrap her mind around this new information.

“Hey Jade! Ya need another drink?” Airk yells at her and slaps his hand on her shoulder.

Yes, she needs all the drinks tonight.

Jade sees Airk look over at Kit talking to Elora. From their glances over to them, she could take one guess what was being discussed. Jade stares back as Kit locks eyes with her. Kit’s eyes look desperate to explain while simultaneously looking her up and down, almost longingly.

“You know, my sister and Graydon, it’s not real right? They’ve been linked by our families for years but Kit for obvious reasons would be miserable and Graydon definitely doesn’t like her like that. They’re not even officially engaged. More like engaged to be engaged?” Airk spews out. “So you don’t have anything to be worried about.”

“Why would I be worried?” Jade deflects his very accurate interpretation of the situation.

“Oh c’mon, Jade!”

Jade takes a long swig of her near empty second cocktail.

“Wow, Elora was right. You two are hopeless, you know that?” Airk walks away and lets Jade sulk in silence.

Jade grabs a third cocktail and walks to the outside of the crowded ballroom dance floor. People watching seems like a safer bet than mingling at this point in the night. She’s had enough of mingling.
________________

Kit is tired of making mindless small talk with these people and her shoes are making her toes pinch together in the most uncomfortable way. Speaking of uncomfortable, this forced dance with Graydon was almost as uncomfortable with her mom glancing over every ten seconds to make sure they were smiling. Not to mention how Graydon stepped on her toes every other full turn. Did they not teach him this at his boarding school? Whoever he ends up with better have the patience of a saint and toes of steel.

The timing of this dance was suspect. She clocked Zivian Hastur talking to her mother across the room again and put the pieces together.

“So, how much did my mother pay you this time?” Kit asks out of boredom, anything to make this over with as fast as possible.

Her mother always bribes or threatens one of them into putting on a show and dancing at least once at these parties. It’s exhausting keeping up with their parents' terms but at least her and Graydon have come to a mutual understanding that they’re not interested in each other at all.

“No bribe actually. Pure intimidation this time.” Graydon says almost shocked and she notes slight disappointment at the lack of cash he’d have to spend later.

“Ah, changing it up. Probably trying to save a little after her Christmas European vacation.”

Kit knows Graydon will pick up on the sarcasm. They’ve reached a place in this weird archaic arrangement where they’ve actually become friends.

It was hard not to think back to the previous conversation that evening, when this stupid arrangement was revealed to Jade. The look in her eyes was filled with confusion and Kit desperately wanted to explain the full situation to her, to explain it wouldn’t actually happen. To explain it was temperamental and to keep up appearances. Graydon’s father had some type of hold over her mom and Kit still didn’t fully understand it but she knew it was serious and Kit needed to stay in line and do her dutiful part. But Kit was allowed to do what she wanted to do behind closed doors and it wasn’t exactly a secret. The press was constantly contemplating the odd pairing and her obvious gravitation towards women– not to mention her androgynous appearance in everyday life versus her skating life.

Kit falls silent as she catches Jade’s eyes across the room. Jade’s stare lingers on her and she can’t not notice the glum look in her eyes. If Kit didn’t know any better, she’d say she was jealous. Her heart skips at the possibility that Jade would even care if Kit was tied to anybody.

She’s trying to be discreet but captain observant notices her distracted gaze shift past him and he also glances back. Shit, why can’t he be the oblivious mouse she initially met? Panic erupts in her chest at trying to explain this to him, not that he’d care but she already got an earful from Elora earlier.

Truthfully, Kit was out of excuses — denying her attraction. Her feelings for Jade were getting harder to ignore with every practice, every late night hang out, every lingering feeling and fairly innocent touch.

“I see your mind is elsewhere.” Graydon calls her out and she snaps her head back to him. He continues his unsolicited commentary on her distraction. “You should ask her to dance with you. Just go for it!” Graydon encourages. “Who cares what others think, everyone is already drunk and no prying parents in sight anymore.”

He actually has a point. Maybe she should take the risk and follow her heart. Consequences be damned.

It’s just a dance - a perfectly normal thing to do at a holiday party.

Taking another quick glance over at Jade and she’s gone. Her stomach sinks and she searches the room again, catching red curls retreating into a back hallway.

Their forced dance is over and Kit discreetly launches herself toward Jade’s trail. A tray full of champagne passes by and she quickly grabs two flutes in the hope Jade would appreciate the gesture. She takes a quick glance back and sneaks into the darkened hallway to catch up to Jade.
________________

Jade escapes into a nearby room needing to get away from the crowd. It’s almost midnight and she doesn’t want to spend it watching Kit play make believe for her mother’s sake in front of her.

It’s ridiculous to feel jealous but it’s undeniably bubbling up to the surface.

As soon as she found out about the situation with Graydon, her stomach dropped, like she needed to swoop in to save Kit. But she’s no knight and knows these growing feelings for Kit need to be pushed down — a disaster waiting to happen.

She surveys the unfamiliar room and realizes she’d never been in here — it's usually closed off. The grand tour she eventually received didn’t even include this room. It's cozy, a marble fireplace casts a flickering light over the room. Picture frames line the entire back wall. The side walls are filled with top to floor built in bookcases, stuffed to the brim with books and trinkets. A giant cushy chair sat off to the side of the fire, ready for someone to curl up and relax in it. Golden picture frames lining the mantle catch her eye as she makes her way over to them.

In every picture there is a man that Jade assumes is Kit’s dad due to the cascading hair and blue eyes. Damn, the genes are strong in this family. The first picture is a very serious wedding photo of him and Sorsha, it reminds her of a stiff, formal royal photograph. But behind it is one where the twins are both hung upside down by their ankles by their dad, all laughing and having a great time. Seeing a carefree, silly small Kit makes Jade smile and laugh to herself.

The door suddenly creaks open and she retracts her body from the private photos. Oh shit, she’s caught and there’s nowhere to hide. The feeling of doing something she shouldn’t be doing makes her chest tighten as the door slowly opens.

Two delicate hands clutching champagne flutes appear and Kit’s head pokes in to survey the room clocking Jade immediately. Watching Kit walk towards her in that dark green skin tight dress is entrancing and Jade is powerless to stop her eyes raking up and down her silhouette, lingering on her slightly exposed chest and swaying hips — hips she wanted to reach out and pull against her body but kept her hands to herself. They weren’t her hips to touch. They apparently belong to someone else.

Her control is constantly challenged around this woman, but she’s nothing if not stoic and respectful. The wild and visceral fantasies at night stray far from respectful, however.

“Hey Claymore, I thought I saw you come in here.” Kit says mischievously, her eyes gleam from the fire next to them. Handing Jade’s champagne to her, timidly clinking them together. She took a sip and enjoyed the tingling sensation on her tongue from the floating bubbles.

“And what are we toasting about?”

“To the new year, of course!” Kit laughs at her own answer. She seems so pleased with herself, it’s adorable. “And we can add on friendship. How does that sound?”

Friendship. Right, that’s all this is — that’s all she and Kit could be. Friends and skating partners. They can’t go past that, it would never work, right? But this overwhelming magnetic thing between them, when it’s just them, is growing like wisteria on a trellis — unstoppable.

Maybe it’s not all in her head and Kit feels it too? Maybe the wedding shit earlier really is fake and she has a resemblance of a chance with Kit?

“Friendship, huh?” Jade asks with a sly smile and takes her shot, stepping closer to Kit. Kit’s sparkling blue eyes widen in awe at Jade’s sudden brashness. She swears she sees Kit’s eyes flicker down to her mouth. Jade licks her lips absentmindedly in response.

Kit doesn’t back up, so Jade inches even closer, probing her way into her space. She methodically takes their glasses and places them on the fireplace mantle next to them. She’s not sure where this courage is coming from. Maybe it’s the alcohol. Maybe it’s the party. Maybe it’s seeing Kit dance with someone else.

It’s not like they aren’t this close every day. She’s touched Kit so intimately, with clothes on, more times than she can count. She knows when Kit is relaxed and trusts her during practice versus when she’s tense and frustrated. This particular closeness is different, it’s not their job and no one is watching them.

Kit’s expression is new to Jade — vulnerable and inviting eyes meet hers. Trying to fight her fears to dart her eyes away and break this momentary trance. Jade looks directly down at Kit’s lips — making her intentions clear.

Ten! Nine! The crowd outside counting down to the new year but all Jade can focus on is the rise and fall of Kit’s chest as her eyes grow darker. Desperate even.

Eight! Seven! She brushes her nose against Kit’s, their breath mingling as she nudges closer. The feeling of Kit’s fingers brushing Jade’s waist in a tentative attempt to reach out and touch her and pull her even more into this gravitational pull.

Six! Five! Kit’s eyes are focused on Jade’s lips. Kit does want this as much as she does, right?

Four! Three! Jade licks her lips in anticipation of kissing the plump pink ones right in front of her. It’d be so easy to capture them and never stop.

Two! One! Just as she’s going in for the kiss and their lips almost meet, there's a loud clunk outside the door and Airk and Elora stumble inside. Kit’s pleading eyes are still focused on Jade but she immediately pulls away. They’re breathing is still ragged from the lead up to their almost kiss.

“Hey guys! Happy New Year!” Airk yells, completely wasted with a bottle of champagne in his hand.

“Oops, Airk I think we might’ve interrupted something.” Elora says and at least looks guilty for barging in on them. Elora pushes Airk out and closes the door behind them.

They’re alone again. Both not sure what to say or do now. The moment has passed but there's enough tension in the air to fill a hot air balloon festival.

“Um, Happy New Year, Jade.” Kit says as she grabs her glass of champagne and swiftly walks out before Jade can say it back.

“Kit, wait!” Jade is too late. She’s gone.

Fuck.

Jade will be thinking of that almost kiss every day and night for the foreseeable future.

Why did she wait so long to kiss her?

Why did she drag it out like that?

Ugh, this was going to haunt her dreams.

Will it haunt Kit’s dreams, too?

Maybe they could meet in them together and finish what they started.

Chapter Text

The moment Kit glides across the resurfaced ice at the United States Figure Skating Championships rink, an ease and confidence washes over her, especially with Jade by her side. Between practices and press, it was a whirlwind to finally be back at her favorite event of the season. There’s a special feeling she gets at nationals, a sense that anything can happen.

The competition has been fierce this year but their artistic and technical scores are more impressive compared to most of their competitors. Elora’s new choreography paid off in terms of improving their score and Allagash seemed relatively calm with their routines. The consistent performances improved their trust in each other as a working unit over the last few months. The short program was a beautiful almost ballet-like performance; a tortured piece from the Romeo + Juliet score that Sorsha reluctantly accepted as their traditional skate. The long performance is a crowd favorite though; it’s fast paced, sensual and she feels like she’s on fire with Jade every single time they perform it.

It’s currently warm up time before the short program and there’s never enough time to actually warm up and practice each skill. Everyone dreads the two minutes left announcement. Kit can tell the quickly approaching warning is causing Jade to rush a bit more than usual. It’s not typically how she reacts though. Kit is normally the one rushing into their routine. Jade is always the steady one.

They ultimately decide to use the precious time remaining to practice their lifts. The first one goes smoothly, Jade’s hands are quick and strong in releasing her petite body into the air. Her blades hit the ice with perfect force and position. All of those ballet lessons really pay off when you can align grace with strength on the ice. Consistent off ice conditioning is equally important to help muscle memory but her muscles were betraying her. Instead of relaxing into the pressure of Jade’s fingers during a lift, her muscles constrict. It’s as if her body is catching up to her mind, growing impatient until the tension is released. A muscle can’t stay constricted, it has to be able to release, only then will it grow in strength and learn how to handle the intensity.

Kit’s balance is shaky, it’s the second lift that has her increasingly flustered.

All these dizzying feelings for Jade have been simmering like a thickening sauce made from scratch, left too long it could boil over and burn. Sometimes Jade will touch her during a lift and she has to actively not think if only her hands were touching her like this without clothes on and crushing her body into tangled bed sheets.

It’s been two months since their almost kiss and the unresolved sexual tension is slowly twisting her stomach in knots. The amount of times she’s fantasized about pulling Jade in and closing that millimeter gap from the holiday party should be studied. In that moment, time froze and everything faded away around them. They’ve been ignoring it so well, she feels like she made it up at times.

They did have a moment, didn’t they? They’ve had lots of moments.

Kit’s calm and cool resolve is sinking like quicksand and the only other feelings she can pull up from the heavy depths of sand are awkward silences and snarky one-liners that some say are quite charming when said with the right facial expression.

Kit tries to focus on the current reality instead. The practice is going well and they get set up for their next big element. They make brief eye contact as Jade looks down to where her hands need to be and in one swift motion Kit briefly soars in the air, but is quickly released down into a fumbled dismount, still holding firmly to Jade’s hand.

Breathing like she just ran a marathon, Kit pauses to catch her breath, a bit hunched over in defeat. She looks up into honey brown eyes that are patiently waiting for an explanation, and all she can do is stare knowingly at Jade. She fucked the lift up, yeah she knows. Ugh, her horny thoughts did not need to betray her like this, especially at this extremely climactic moment in their skating careers.

During the lift, Kit hesitated and it caused Jade to slightly overcorrect her posture. Jade must’ve felt it because she took it as a cue to help her out of the uneasiness. To not let her fall, or worse, hurt Jade in the process. This sport is full of risks. There will always be miscalculations, injuries, and even death. Kit’s seen some pretty gruesome injuries throughout her life but that’s the risk you take when you choose to do tricks on ice with what are essentially tiny swords on shoes.

Her thoughts come back to the present as her stare lingers on blushed cheeks under a never ending string of freckles.

“Thanks, I got a little off there.” Kit says, trying to brush the mistake off.

There’s a bead of sweat and loose hair tendril just above Jade’s eyebrow and before she thinks twice about it she reaches out to brush it away. It’s a gesture she’s absentmindedly made a few times while they practice, except this time Jade affectionately takes Kit’s hand as it lowers from her face and squeezes gently while keeping hold of a few interlaced fingers.

“Kit, I meant it when I said I’d never let you fall. Never.” Jade assures. She squeezes her hand again and looks like she’d take on an entire army if it meant keeping Kit safe. No one has ever looked at her the way Jade continually looks at her.

Realistically, she knows that’s not a promise Jade can keep considering falling is a natural part of this sport but she understands she’d do everything she could so Kit wouldn’t hurt herself. So she wouldn’t experience the trauma of her previous fall. It was considerate and adorably naive but she knows Jade means it. The sincerity and determination in her eyes speak volumes.

However, unwavering sincerity makes Kit want to take a step out of Jade’s orbit. To retreat back into something out of her fantasy novels – crumbled stone walls with ladders scattered in a courtyard of disappointment. But she’s been better at being brave lately. In one of the many nights they stayed up talking in the guest house, Kit confided in Jade about her last Olympics experience and how it still feels raw to her sometimes. It felt good to open up about it to her and share the pain.

“Well, if it isn't the Kit Tanthalos.” Kit flinches at the familiar voice behind her. The harsh stop of the skates combined with the grating voice could make her ears bleed.

Speaking of pain.

Conversing with their competition was inevitable. They had done a pretty good job keeping to themselves at the previous performances. Kit purposely steered Jade clear of this woman for as long as she could. She even paid an event staff member at a previous rink to help make sure they didn’t cross direct paths.

Kit’s luck has finally run out. It’s best to get this over with as soon as possible.

She takes a deep breath and turns around to face her arch nemesis.

“Ah, Lili, while I always look forward to these interactions we’re clearly busy practicing.” Kit replies.

“Clearly.” Lili clocks Jade, giving her a once over and Kit does not like the glint of desire in her eyes. Jade is off limits, especially to her least favorite person in the world. “And who might this be?”

“Lili Cashmere, meet Jade Claymore, my skating partner.” Kit replies with pride over her new partner.

“Just a skating partner?” Lili inquires and tilts her head towards Jade again.

“Yeah, hi I’m Jade and I think that me and whoever this person by you is,” Jade points to a blonde tousled hair skater next to Lili, “would appreciate it if you’d both stop talking like we aren’t standing right ‘ere.”

Announcers: Two minutes left, skaters!

“Ugh, they never give us enough time to warm up!” Lili seethes but takes one last look at both Kit and Jade before pulling her own partner away.

“Okay, well now that that’s over let‘s move onto practicing those sit spins, I think I’m not getting my knees right and it’s throwing off our timing.”

“Uh, woah there! What the hell was that all about?” Jade asks, stopping them by the side panel.

Kit sighs in response to her very fair question. It’s not that she didn’t want to tell Jade about all of this but now was not the time. However, the look in Jade’s eyes says she’s not moving an inch until she gets some kind of explanation for the heated exchange.

She takes another deep breath and decides to at least tell her the cliff notes version.

“Lili and I go way back in the skating world. She’s a monster, she’s manipulative and her family sucks.” Kit states, throwing her hands up hoping that covers it all pretty nicely.

“C’mon, she can’t be that bad.”

“Jade, just trust me, she’s bad news.”

Jade nods and looks over to Lili and her partner landing perfect double axels.

“Right, let’s go practice those spins.” Jade suggests. “Unless you fancy showing off our own double axel?”

A wicked smile splashes across Kit’s face as she pulls Jade out on the ice for one more move.

______________________________

Practice and the short competition are over before she can fully process it. They finished in second place, which was surprising since Allagash mentioned these judges might be more critical on the superficial and non-traditional aspects of their routine. The music they chose, for instance, was instrumental but a more modern film score and they’re costumes weren’t the most traditional either. Jade wore an all black long sleeve bodysuit with rhinestones down it to accentuate her lines and Kit had on a matching leotard with a jagged torn up skirt, as if she’d been electrocuted by Jade’s lightning string of rhinestones. If they didn’t like their short program costumes, they were going to lose it over tomorrow’s costumes.

Feeling content with the scores, Kit can’t get off the ice fast enough. Kit’s eyes are drawn to Jade quietly taking off her skates and she mumbles she’s going to go take a quick nap before their celebratory dinner tonight. Jade had been distant lately. No late night hang outs or walks. Just practice and competitions. It’s as if the almost kiss didn’t even happen. Or maybe Jade regrets it and is trying to ignore it ever happening? Maybe it’s a good thing to keep things professional for now.

Kit runs into Airk and honestly it’s the perfect distraction from her thoughts. They start to head up to their rooms and Kit stops in her tracks as she sees Jade and Lili talking outside the elevator, heading to the lounge area. She feels her cheeks heat up and practically snarls at the exchange. Lili laughs at a quip Jade makes and places her hand on her bicep that lingers too long for Kit’s liking.

What the actual fuck was going on? What happened to her taking a nap?

Airk pulls Kit into the elevator as he drones on and on about how romantic his surprise date for Elora will be later tonight but all Kit can think about is the fact that Jade would even entertain Lili’s presence after what Kit told her.

She decides to change and freshen up before trying to confront Jade about it.

She needs to walk away and cool off.
____________________________________

“Ughhhh! I can’t believe Jade was hanging out with Lili!” Kit grunts in frustration. “Like is she even taking nationals seriously?” Kit yells while crawling around on her hands and knees looking for her lost piece of jewelry.

They were running late but she had to find it or she was going to feel off all night. She knew she wouldn't have time to confront Jade about the Lili situation, which made her anxiety even worse knowing she was already headed into a tense dinner situation.

“Should’ve known Lili would sink her teeth into Jade.” Kit mutters more to herself than her brother.

“Uh Kit, what the hell are you doing exactly?” Airk asks as she’s still patting the carpet underneath a chair next to him. “And whatever it is, can you hurry it up before mom loses it when we’re late to dinner with the Hasturs?”

The emotional dysregulation is throwing her into a tailspin of feelings she’s been pushing down for so long she thinks they’ve made it all the way to the Earth’s core at this point.

Apparently not though. Apparently they were simmering right on the surface ready to erupt like a volatile volcano.

After continuing her search for a few more seconds, she finally looks up at her brother, blowing the hair out of her face in annoyance.

“I can’t find my lucky bracelet!” Kit erupts at her pestering brother.

Airk tilts his head slightly towards her, silently questioning her reaction.

“You’re falling for her.” Airk says almost matter of factly.

“What?” Kit answers with a nervous laugh. “No, that’s insane. I mean it would never work, you’ve seen how we act around each other, we’re always bickering.”

Staying silent, Airk leans forward and reaches down to pick up a thin silver chain from underneath the coffee table in front of him. He leisurely hands it over to Kit, his eyebrows raised with an amused smile.

“Yeah, exactly. Foreplay.”
___________________________________

This might be the nicest hotel Jade has ever seen, let alone stayed in. It’s so nice she feels good enough to take her socks off and walk barefoot on the freshly cleaned carpet. There’s a free espresso machine with a fully stocked fridge of milk to froth and a fresh fruit platter. Man, the hockey leagues really cheated the teams out of luxury didn’t they? Even the last Olympics wasn’t this bougie. What kind of budget did the nationals board agree to anyway? Although, the nicer accommodations were most likely due to having the Hasturs and Tanthalos fortunes combined to help them achieve Olympic greatness. Most of the skaters in this competition came from money and privilege, something Jade didn’t have and always had to work three times as hard to get her foot in the door.

The celebratory dinner had finished awhile ago, the ride back to the hotel took longer than expected due to an accident that closed a main roadway in the city. During the traffic jam, Jade decided to check in with Scorpia and Boorman. She invited them to the competition but they couldn’t get the time off. They were too busy with lessons and group sports starting back up. A tinge of guilt followed her whenever they mentioned how busy they were but she shrugged it off. They were being as supportive as they could be and Jade knew she was ultimately doing the right thing. What Kit and her were doing was like catching lighting in a bottle.

The dinner itself was odd and not just due to the Hasturs being there. While they did celebrate their short program win and the Hasturs were civil, Kit was acting a bit standoffish toward her and she couldn’t pinpoint the cause.Things had been tense lately but they usually had some playful back and forth mixed into their conversations. She yearned for those slightly flirty interactions because it blurred the lines just enough to feed her attraction and calm the pull to Kit. She was able to feed off the tension for days. Every lopsided smirk, every snarky comment in her sarcastic, husky tone — it all kept her starvation at bay. Recently she’d replay their interactions and fantasize having Kit’s voice against her ear until her breathing quickened and her body ached for more. She wanted to get her fix without actually acting on it and not messing up everything Kit’s worked for, to keep it professional and not give into her desires. She has to stay in line. They’re so close to their end goal, if they can just keep it together a little longer.

A loud pounding of consecutive knocks draws Jade’s attention to the door. She jumps from her crouched stance by the fridge and hears someone yell her name on the other side — it sounds like Airk. She immediately runs over to see what the fuss is about.

“Jade! Finally, you have to come with me right now!” Airk says hastily, practically pulling his hair out.

“It’s Kit.”

That’s all she needs to hear for her to immediately follow Airk. Kit needs her. She’ll be there, she promised afterall.

Airk fills her in on the story as they approach Kit’s hotel room. Apparently Zivian Hastur threatened Sorsha and Kit into an official engagement announcement that had to happen by the end of the competition or they’d pull the curtain down on their sponsorship agreement.

Airk got kicked out of her room after trying to console her. At first she wouldn’t say a word, then finally blew up at him and pushed him out the door. He had an extra key card to get in but decided to recruit the only reinforcement Kit might talk to instead — Jade.

Jade's body tenses as she swipes the card. Her gaze is immediately drawn to Kit sitting on the edge of her bed in the dark. She looks so broken. Kit doesn’t seem to acknowledge Jade’s intrusion and continues to stare down at the beige carpet with her shoulders slumped in defeat. She’s seen Kit down and out before but never quite like this. She takes a few long strides until she’s standing directly over the sulking woman before her.

“You can’t run away from this, Kit.” Jade says gently, trying to test the waters of where Kit’s head is at with all of this, her thoughts racing faster than a skier going downhill through an open course.

This entire situation is unfair. Kit deserves to live her own life, to be with whoever she wants to marry and not have to bend to parental figures who don’t seem to understand what this pressure is doing to her. If Kit keeps bottling up all of these secrets and emotions, she’ll explode and leave pieces of shrapnel in everyone around her.

Jade thinks of a phrase that has haunted her since she read them on the plane ride over here. Now’s as good a time as any to quote something to break this silence. To quote something Kit probably knows like the back of her hand.

“Grown-ups never understand anything for themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them." Jade quotes. She hopes the familiar words envelope Kit in an invisible hug. She hopes she worded it correctly. Quoting things isn’t exactly her strength but she used to date someone who really liked referencing everything she’d ever watched or read so she picked up a lot while in that relationship.

Kit’s head twitches up at the familiar words from The Little Prince, her favorite book.

Jade takes this opportunity to slowly reach out and cradle the side of Kit’s face. She doesn't force her to put her chiseled profile on display. Jade wants Kit to choose to fully look up from the shadows that haunt her and hide her light. It needs to be her decision.

After a few seconds, Kit slowly peers up at Jade, leaning ever so slightly into her hand cupping her face. The urge to caress her cheek as a form of comfort feels too intimate. Her eyes would surely flutter closed at the friction and she’d lean forward to engulf Kit in a hug if she did that. To Jade’s surprise, Kit is the one that leaps up, leans forward and wraps her arms around Jade's shoulders, grabbing a fist full of her white shirt collar and buries her face in the crook of her warm freckled neck.

Her breath stops only for a moment and then she’s hugging Kit back with a squeeze that she hopes keeps Kit’s pieces glued together for a little while longer.

“Thanks for coming to check on me.” Kit mumbles half into Jade's neck and half toward her ear. Her voice vibrates through her skin, sending shivers down her spine. Before trusting her voice again, she swallows some spit to help lubricate her dry throat and sucks in a sharp breath filled with the scent of Kit’s green tea shampoo.

Oh God this is torture.

“Of course.” Jade reassures her and pulls back slightly. Neither of them break eye contact and Kit’s fingers are still holding onto her shirt collar like a safety net. If she lets go she’ll fall but Jade won’t let her, not with her arms wrapped around her waist.

Kit leans in to softly kiss Jade’s cheek and her heart stops for a brief moment.

“What‘re you doin’?” Jade questions Kit’s seemingly innocent kiss as their eyes meet again, except this time their noses brush. Kit inches more towards her as if their lips are magnets, always drawn to each other and nothing is in the way to stop them. Jade’s peripheral vision goes hazy and all she can feel is a wave of desire for this woman in front of her. The pull is so strong that if Kit doesn’t lean all the way in soon she might keel over from the anticipation.

She wants this to be Kit’s choice.

“I’m finishing what you started at the party.” Kit whispers and initiates what Jade has been fantasizing about every waking night since New Year’s Eve.

Kit closes the gap and her soft, warm lips firmly capture Jade’s like she’s starving. A surprised moan escapes her throat, muffled by Kit’s tongue asking for entrance. Fuck yes you can stick your tongue down my throat and anywhere else you want to. Kit’s tongue is surprisingly gentle, exploring with a care that makes her body melt instantly at the contact.

Even though Jade is the one leaning slightly over Kit in dominance, it’s Kit who has true control of this situation. Jade decides to test how many walls are still up for her, as she firmly engulfs Kit’s face in her palms to deepen the kiss even more. It feels like she’s pressing her entire body into kissing her as their tongues continue to massage each other, only growing the hunger for more contact. A whiny, desperate moan escapes Kit’s lips and Jade feels the vibrations go straight to her core. A fire has been lit and there’s no sign of it being extinguished.

Kit’s fingers, still firmly grasping at Jade's shirt collar, pulls Jade down onto the bed as she lays back. Jade instinctively places her right knee in between Kit’s legs, their bodies fully touching, pressing into each other like waves crashing into the shore. Kit’s core meets Jade’s knee with each roll of their bodies, it creates an addictive spark of friction. Her hips automatically react and roll to the feel of Kit pressing into her. A back and forth, a challenge of who’s going back down and submit to the other first. A competition of dominance that feels different from their actions on the rink.

Jade wonders if Kit feels as wet as she is right now. What it must feel like to slip her fingers past the clothes and sink her fingers into her warm folds. To feel her walls contract around her fingers as they both moan from the pleasure of feeling connected, feeling whole.

But Jade’s fears creep in like vines sneaking up a brick building. If not properly contained and managed, it could cause permanent structural damage. Is she taking advantage of Kit’s vulnerability? Should they stop? What if this tryst jeopardizes everything they’ve been working for? This is only going to complicate things.

It’s increasingly hard to think straight about what they’re doing; with each swipe of her tongue she abandons a fear.

And oh, Kit is kissing her back with just as much vigor. It's everything she’s imagined. It’s better, it’s real. How could she possibly stop this now? It’s pure instinct and her resolve has broken into a tiny million pieces. She’s shattered for Kit and only Kit. She wants to drink this up for as long as Kit wants it to happen. Kit sinks a playful bite into Jade’s lower lip and a whimper escapes her throat, making her ache with want. Kit’s reactions feed Jade’s need to make this amazing woman feel more cared for and truly desired. She deserves that in her life. She deserves to choose her own path and be with whomever she chooses to share it.

Right now, Jade feels lucky that Kit wants her back.

Kit pulls at the baby curls at the nape of Jade's neck as Jade’s hand snakes past the hem of Kit’s shirt before a loud knock on the door causes their lips to pull apart.

“Is everything okay in there?” Airk yells and knocks again. “I don’t hear any yelling…should I leave or wait for you guys?”

Kit’s breathing is ragged below her, lips swollen and wet from their mingled saliva. Fuck she’s so gorgeous it hurts. Jade doesn’t want to stop, doesn’t want Kit’s fingers to stop their consistent grip on her shirt collar and loose strands of hair. But all good things must come to an end, right? And leave it to Airk to interrupt them…again.

Kit slides out from Jade’s arms and she tries to compose herself. Her gaze follows Kit as she rakes her fingers through her hair and walks over to open the door.

Airk sighs, clearly relieved Kit is the one that answered the door and envelopes her in a bear hug so tight it almost cuts off her air supply.

“Kit! What the hell, you had me worried there for a minute.”

“I’m ok, really.” Kit answers, her voice a little shaky.

“Well luckily I grabbed Jade to help get you out of this mood of yours.” Airk looks over at her and freezes. “Umm, Jade, your collar looks a bit out of whack. Might want to fix that.”

Jade blushes and fixes her shirt collar immediately.

“And what were you both up to in here?” Airk asks mischievously, a smirk splashing across his face.

Kit locks eyes with Jade and is clearly trying to mouth something to her but she’s never been that great at reading lips.

Kit panics and says “Uhh, we were doing some breathing exercises to calm me down a bit. It really helps your nervous system, ya know?”

Airk stares between them both, not impressed with Kit’s obvious lie but decides to let it go.

“Whatever you say, sis.” Airk goes along with it as a good brother would. “Just glad to see you doing better. I’m gonna head to Elora’s room and see what she’s up to.”

Jade’s breath and fears come rushing back. Maybe she should take Airk leaving as a cue to go back to her own room. Jade walks towards Kit, ready to say goodbye and most likely ignore what just happened. She needs time to process actually getting your heart’s desire while also staying professional.

As she tries to leave, Kit grabs Jade’s wrist and pulls her back into the room. Jade’s back is against the door before she can register Kit’s lips back on hers. It’s a relief and a welcome back into her warmth. Kit is pressing her slender frame into Jade’s with all her might and fuck it’s enough to get lost in again. She has just enough will power to break them apart.

“Wait, we should talk about this first. Figure out what this means?” Jade interjects, even though her body is screaming at her to drag Kit back on the king sized bed.

“I was just kissing you goodnight, Claymore.” Kit teases. “Can we just leave it at that? We can talk more tomorrow? Please?”

Kit’s tone started as a playful jest, but quickly turned into soft vulnerability at the word please.

Emotions seem to be something Kit likes to ignore when faced with reality but concedes to Kit’s plea. Even though she wanted to address whatever it was that was going on between them. Not to mention the complicated and shitty situation the Hasturs were putting on Kit’s family. It was all too much and they had their long program to be mentally prepared for tomorrow.

Jade nods, gives Kit one more chaste kiss (because why not) and leaves. Tomorrow is a big day.
___________________________________

Jade is panicking and overall not keeping her shit together — she’s late and the last thing she wants is to let Kit down. She rushes through the cold, cement walled arena. They usually walk in together but Kit had some press to do with her mother so they told her to arrive later. Barreling through the rink entrance, she sneaks up right behind Kit, breathing heavily and feeling a sheen of sweat drip from her forehead. Before Kit even acknowledges her presence she abruptly turns back to where she came from and throws up behind a curtain. Her stomach is in knots. Someone she’s never seen before hands her a napkin to wipe her mouth with and she throws it in the nearest trash can. She heads back over toward the rink again.

“You okay over there, Jade?” Kit looks back warily.

“Yeah, yeah, totally. It’s just, ya know every time before a really big game I’d get kind of nauseous from the nerves.” Swallowing acid back down her throat, she tries to keep her stomach in check as she takes her blade guards off.

“Except I’d always vomit in my extra helmet I brought with me.”

“And you're just telling me this now?” Kit whispers while gritting her teeth.

Jade was fine at the prior competitions, this one just felt bigger, like an elephant was sitting directly on her chest. This determined who went to the Olympics and that was not something she wanted to screw up—especially for Kit.

“I’ll be fine soon, it usually goes away in about ten minutes.”

“The program is four minutes long!” Kit exasperates.

“Right, so six minutes later I’ll be fine.” Jade’s not even looking at her, just staring intensely ahead at the rink going through the performance in her head.

“Alright kids, you’re up!” Allagash nearly pushes Jade out and takes her place next to Kit as the music cues up. She takes Kit’s hand, her nerves fade and she knows they’ve got this in the bag.

The program goes by in an absolute blur — Jade thinks she blacked out for most of it. They fucking nailed it though and her adrenaline is coursing through her veins in an almost feral way.

Announcer One: They were on fire out there,Tara! Wow, an absolutely lightning performance, beautiful execution on those lifts. That’s a pair that want to win gold at nationals!

Announcer Two: Absolutely, and a well deserved standing ovation from the audience. This has at least got them to the top three but we’ll wait for the scores to come in. Looks like the judges had to review a couple of elements, but I’m not sure what that would be because, to me, it seemed near perfect.

They’re given a couple of the stuffed animals thrown onto the ice by fans as they find their seats. Jade even saw a couple of pride flags out in the audience and it made her heart soar.

Sitting on the side, waiting for the scores next to Kit was agonizing. The judges must’ve been debating their score because it didn’t usually take this long. Kit’s holding her hand so tightly it’s going slightly numb but she’s squeezing back just as much. It feels good to have someone to share these nerves with, it feels like they’re in their bubble again.

A sudden roar of boos from the audience calls their attention to the scoreboard, the technical aspects are lower than they thought it’d be.

“What the…?” Kit starts to question and sucks in her breath, holding back the curse word in front of the cameras but Jade could guess what kind of expletives would follow later when no one was watching. Leaning into Jade’s ear, she whispers, “That’s way lower than it should be, it doesn't make any sense.”

Jade felt like she was going to puke again, but held it together as the crowd’s grumblings tapered off and Allagash escorted them out of the area as the last pair took the ice.

“Fucking, fuck!” Kit yells as she kicks a trash can in the back room. The third kick knocks the trash over completely causing Jade to flinch at her outburst.

“And there it is.” Muttering this more to herself than the feisty brunette next to her. It was only a matter of time before Kit took her frustration out on an inanimate object; today a bin was the target of her rage. She really needed to better regulate her emotions, but Jade couldn’t criticize her too much since she tended to channel her rage into an old boxing bag every now and then. Allagash didn’t approve of her extra curricular work outs. It could fuck up her fingers and hands that were extremely important to keep in good condition per her contract but Jade would sneak it in when someone pissed her off. One time Kit caught her in the back of the guest house and asked if she could teach her. Jade eventually succumbed to those deep blue eyes and stubborn persistence.

Kit kicks the bin one last time for good measure. Apparently they’d gone too long in between boxing sessions.

“Kit, stop! Anyone else could walk in here and see you losin’ your shit. Let’s just sit down and wait for the final results, yeah?” Drawn to her, she starts to reach for her hand but abruptly pulls back. Kit surprises her by hastily grabbing her hand after noticing her hesitation. Her breath catches in her throat and practically melts inside at the small gesture. Maybe Kit does truly want her, needs her even? The kiss last night alluded to reciprocated attraction at least. This gesture snaps more puzzle pieces together of Kit’s feelings for her. Squeezing Kit’s hand, she walks them toward the row of televisions set up along the back wall intently observing the rest of the performances.

The other skaters fall on a huge jump, then they fall again on a tight spin.That means their score will be significantly impacted. The specific jumps they attempted had high difficulty points and without those it was impossible to gain them back.

“Jade, did that just…did they just fall again?” Kit’s gaze is still transfixed on the screens in front of them, still holding Jade’s hand rubbing small, featherlike circles across her skin. Kit’s light touch is giving her goosebumps and only slightly distracts her from the reality of the situation.

“Holy shit, we did it.” Jade shakes her head in disbelief and turns Kit toward her, locking eyes and grinning like a cheshire cat. “I think we just got second place at nationals!”

Kit leaps into her arms like a catapult, laughing and clutching her shirt like she did in bed last night. With the familiar scent of Kit’s shampoo under her nose, she tries to shake that thought from her mind, pulls back from the hug and tenderly kisses Kit’s forehead. She lingers longer than she should, putting all her pride and admiration into it. She is so fucking proud of them and most of all, proud of Kit. Little by little, they were making Kit’s dreams come true.

This moment feels like she’s exactly where she’s supposed to be, by Kit’s side.