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Chapter Text

The next morning, Crusher woke feeling warm and comfortable. 

It took a moment for her to get her bearings. Yes, she was on the Enterprise- but she was also in Riker's arms.

She smiled as the memory of last night's reunion entered her mind, then glanced at the clock on her nightstand. She was amazed to see that it was 0803, which meant she'd actually slept through the night!

She turned to face Riker, and he stirred, opening his eyes and pulling her into a kiss. 

"Zhuraya saihe," Good morning beautiful, he said, running his fingers through her hair.

Crusher looked into his eyes. They were full of love…for her! Why had she thought she should give this up? 

She smiled in remembrance of a Nahaleit term, n'anera'shen, or 'thought divorced from feeling.'

"Zhuraya," she said, snuggling into Riker's arms. "I guess I have you to thank for my good night's sleep."

"Mmm. Good," he said, yawning. "We're both off today. What do you want to do?"

"I have an idea!" exclaimed Crusher. She jumped out of bed and threw on a robe before running to her closet and pulling out her backpack. She opened it and pulled a large gourd out of a sealed container.

"Do you want to make ar'iloe?" she asked. It was a thick soup whose base was primarily iloe, a type of squash with a sort of sweet and spicy flavor. In their former home, they used to make it fairly often.

"Yes, I do!" replied Riker, his voice full of relief. His stomach was having as hard of a time adjusting as his mind. "Do you have any other food?"

Crusher looked through her belongings. "Absolutely! I have some dried fruit, nuts, and seeds. I think there’s some riverweed left in there too." 

Riker gave Crusher a hopeful look. 

She smiled. "Of course! It's just as much yours as it is mine.”

Riker crossed the room with quick strides, then practically dove into the fruit and nuts. The familiar tastes and textures brought him right back to Nahaleit - which gave him a sort of bittersweet feeling.

Crusher recognized the look on his face and took a seat next to him, linking an arm through his and resting her head on his shoulder. They sat that way in silence for a few minutes.

"What do you miss the most?" he asked finally. It was good to be able to talk about this with someone who understood.

"The people," replied Crusher. "We met such wonderful people!”

Riker nodded. "Yeah, we had a lot of really nice friends." He paused. "I miss a lot of things. The music, for one. And also the river. I've been sitting in staff meetings daydreaming about swimming in a real body of water, not some holographic image.”

"Yes, it’s so different," agreed Crusher, wrinkling her brow. "Being enclosed inside a starship. I was completely used to it before, but now it just feels… different." Sometimes it felt to her as if they’d been away for a lifetime instead of less than 2 years.

"Yeah. And it’s funny how strange it feels to wear a uniform," added Riker. "I mean, I'm proud to represent Starfleet, but was the material always so scratchy?"

"I don't know, but I agree," replied Crusher. "Very uncomfortable, compared to what we wore in Nahaleit."

"True," agreed Riker. "But I guess I can't go comparing everything to what we had in Nahaleit."

Crusher nodded. "It really did seem to have a special something." She paused. "And it's somehow shrouded in mystery. Have you heard from the other senior staff about that?"

Riker shrugged. "Honestly, I don’t think I’ve heard a word they've said. I haven't been the easiest person to talk to."

"I can relate," agreed Crusher. "I’ve been feeling really depressed. And confused." She was hit by a wave of guilt. "So, I'm sorry I-" 

"It's alright," Riker interjected. "You were in shock." 

Crusher nodded and took a seat in his lap. "I really don't know what I was thinking."

Riker returned the affection…which continued until a different thought occurred to Crusher. She narrowed her eyes as she looked into Riker's.

"But along those lines- are you sure you're through womanizing? Because one thing I can't stand is wondering where a man is, who he's with and all of that," said Crusher firmly.

Riker was a little offended. "Yes, I'm through, I told you." He took her hands in his. "Anyway, why would I want anyone else when I have you?"

Crusher smiled. "Flattery may get you somewhere." She kissed him again. 

Riker brushed his nose along Crusher's shoulder and neck. "You still smell like Yovan's soap," he commented. "Don't tell me you brought some of that with you too?"

Crusher grinned as she walked to her closet. "Loads of it! While you were talking to Rimari, I asked Yovan and he gave me all of this." She picked up a sack and opened it, to reveal that it was full to the brim with bars of soap.

Riker approached her slowly. "You think of everything, don't you," he said, wrapping his arms around her.

Crusher shrugged. "Well, I try."

Chapter Text

Crusher and Riker spent the rest of the day doing little, yet doing a lot. First they went to the kitchen and prepared ar'iloe. Even though some of the ingredients were replicated, it made an excellent meal.

Then they went to the arboretum. It paled in comparison to what they were used to; but it was better than not seeing foliage at all.

Next, they considered going to Ten Forward, but decided against it. Today would be a day just for the two of them.

So they went to Riker’s quarters where, among other things, he treated Crusher to her own private xeroek concert.

They thought Crusher’s work schedule would allow them to sleep in the next morning…but instead they woke to calls from Captain Picard. Riker's time off was canceled as there was an emergency mission that required all hands on deck.

First on the agenda was a senior staff meeting at 0700.

Riker and Crusher chatted as they quickly dressed, replicated a breakfast, and sat down to eat.

"What I'm wondering," said Crusher, "Is how to handle this," she said, motioning between herself and Riker. "You know, with other staff members."

"For example, at staff meeting in 10 minutes," continued Riker, before taking a swallow of tea.

"Exactly," confirmed Crusher. She paused for a bite of toast. "They're going to know something's different."

Riker chewed silently as he thought. "That's true. They know us pretty well," he said finally. He wiped his mouth with his napkin before picking up his tea.

Crusher waited for him to say more, but he didn't. "Will!" she said, exasperated. Riker chuckled.

She narrowed her eyes at him. "You do that on purpose, don't you?"

Riker shrugged and gave a smirk. "Maybe."

Crusher threw her napkin at him. Then they both laughed, and stood, holding each other close. And then, spent a short while kissing.

"Ahhh," said Riker, with a proud, satisfied look. "That's how I like to start my day. A little breakfast. A little kissing." He clapped his hands together. "I'm good to go!"

Crusher laughed, then returned to their previous conversation. "So I guess you're not worried about what people will think."

Riker met Crusher's gaze with a look of pure skepticism…which made her laugh so hard she inhaled some of her tea.

"You act as if you don't know me," he replied. "You know I don't care what people think!” But as he finished his sentence, he realized it wasn't entirely true. "Well, except for..."

Crusher's smile faded. "Except for Jean-Luc and Deanna," she finished. She and Riker considered the situation as they cleared their dishes.

"I think Deanna will be supportive," stated Riker. It was a nondescript statement, and he waited to see if Crusher would accept it.

"Of course she'll be supportive, but how will she feel?" asked Crusher. She was starting to get nervous. Was she about to lose her best friend?

"Well, hold on a minute," said Riker thoughtfully. "Who says we need to say anything?"

Crusher considered the thought. "So you think we should sneak around?" Her facial expression suggested dislike of the idea.

"No," answered Riker, shaking his head. "I don't want to do that either. But for the time being, we can just say that we're close."

"Hmm," thought Crusher. "That does have its advantages. It's accurate. And less shocking than other statements we could make."

"Exactly," agreed Riker. "And anyway, why is it anyone's business what we're doing behind closed doors?" Come to think of it, he was tired of everyone talking about his love life!

Crusher nodded, then smirked. "Boy is Lieutenant Harleigh going to be angry!" she joked. She glanced at Riker, who surprised her by frowning deeply and looking away.

"Sorry," apologized Crusher, folding herself into his arms. "Anyway, yes, we'll just say that we were close while we were away, and we finally reconnected."

"Agreed," said Riker. He buried his face in the crook of her neck and inhaled deeply. She smelled so good!

When the feeling of his breath against her skin overloaded her senses, Crusher pulled away.

 "Alright," she said quickly. "I think it's now or never."

Riker nodded, pulling her to him. A moment later they were kissing without any recollection of who initiated it.

"I love you," said Crusher softly, as the kiss faded away.

"I love you too," said Riker. Then he exhaled slowly. "Ready?" he asked in his business tone. He stepped back and straightened his uniform.

"Yes, I am. Meeting, here we come!" said Crusher definitively, striding out with Riker.

It was 0701 when they entered the observation lounge and took seats on opposite sides of the conference table. Captain Picard had just begun to speak.

"Commander, Doctor. Welcome!" said Captain Picard meaningfully. He was empathetic to their situation but did not enjoy being interrupted.

"My apologies Captain," said Riker. "Things are back on track now." Crusher nodded in agreement.

Captain Picard took a closer look at his first officer, then at Dr. Crusher. They looked surprisingly well! 

"Very well Number One," he said, nodding briefly at Riker before returning his attention to the task at hand.

Chapter Text

No one even glanced in Riker or Crusher's direction after their entrance. As Captain Picard explained, the crew were to assist the people of Et-Yarala II, where an innovative way to assess volcanic activity had an unexpected effect- the eruption of all twelve volcanoes was now imminent.

It was the type of mission that involved intense focus, along with emotional reserves, as not all of the outcomes were positive. But in the end, most people and places were safe, and the people of Et-Yarala II were extremely grateful. 

The entire process (evacuation, resolution, and recovery assistance) took 24 days. After that, the intensity of the crew's feelings diminished, which made it easier for Troi to tune into her surroundings. She hoped to check in with Crusher and Riker. 

So early one morning, Troi stopped by Crusher's quarters. She thought Crusher might like to go to Worf's class with her, or perhaps to have breakfast. But when Troi rang the doorchime, there was no answer.

Troi mentally reviewed the past several weeks. Just before the mission, Crusher had come close to revealing something startling in session. As Deanna, she hadn't processed it- as well she shouldn't, as the information was told to her in session! But the brief flickers of emotion Troi could sense from Crusher and Riker, even in the midst of the chaos that defined the roughest parts of the mission, was that they were doing better.

Captain Picard noticed the change too. He saw Riker become calmer, and Crusher less anxious. He also noticed that he saw them together more and more often. And as it turned out, he wasn’t the only one with that impression.

After he received his award, La Forge accepted a position at Starfleet Headquarters. He left directly after his goodbye party, but cornered Riker when he approached to say farewell. 

"So Commander," said La Forge to Riker once everyone else was out of hearing range. He looked swiftly around to make sure they were alone. "You and the Doc?!" he asked incredulously.

Riker was stunned. "How did you know?" Had they really been so obvious?

La Forge paused. "Well, on Nahaleit, Data and I saw the two of you before you saw us."

"Oh," said Riker, remembering the scene. "So Data knows too?"

"Yeah," confirmed La Forge. "I told him to be discreet." 

Riker rubbed his beard thoughtfully. “Alright. That’s good to know."

"So how are things going with her?" asked La Forge.

"Things were great when we were in Nahaleit. Here, we got off to a rocky start, but it's going well now," explained Riker. It actually felt good to be able to tell someone.

"Glad to hear it," replied La Forge. He shook his head in disbelief. "I never saw it coming. Any of this, really!"

"Neither did I," agreed Riker. If there was one thing he could say about the turn of events, it would be that it was unexpected.

"It's a real trip going through that wormhole, isn't it sir?" asked La Forge.

Riker nodded. "It is. I won't forget that anytime soon."

They chatted for a while longer on topics of all kinds.

"Well sir, I’d better go," said La Forge finally. "I'm glad you're back. I hope things go the way you want them to with Dr. Crusher."

"Thank you Mr. La Forge," replied Riker. "And congratulations again. They've got a fine engineer on their hands!"

The two shook hands and clapped each other on the back. La Forge said goodbye to the last few party stragglers, then turned and walked away.

"Really?" asked Crusher later that evening when Riker informed her that La Forge and Data had seen them together in Nahaleit.

"Apparently so," said Riker, shrugging his shoulders.

"Well, I guess that's not surprising, given the circumstances," reasoned Crusher. After all, Geordi and Data had been looking for them, and not the reverse.

"I guess I'm just surprised that Data hasn't asked us about it," she added.

Riker smiled. It was true; Data usually had a lot of questions when he encountered a new finding.

"Well, Geordi said he told Data to 'be discreet,'" informed Riker. He wondered what that meant to their android friend.

"I see," responded Crusher. "I suppose it won't stay a secret forever anyway."

"No," agreed Riker. "I suppose it won't. Not that it needs to be."

"I don't think it does either," said Crusher. She tapped her foot nervously. "In fact, maybe we should tell Deanna and Jean Luc."

Riker let out a slow breath. "You're right," he said finally. "They shouldn't have to wonder or hear from someone else."

Crusher nodded. "I agree." She paused. "Although Deanna might already know, sort of."

Riker froze. "Really?"

"Well," continued Crusher, "First of all, I'm always here." She gestured around Riker's quarters.

He chuckled. "That's true."

"There was also a counseling session that we had," added Crusher. She described it briefly.

"Hmm," said Riker thoughtfully. "I guess we should tell them as soon as possible. How do you want to do this?"

Crusher shrugged. "I don't know. Do you have any ideas?"

Riker nodded. "I think I'd like to tell Deanna." He glanced at Crusher.

"I'll tell Jean Luc," she said definitively.

They reflected silently for a moment.

"How do you think he'll take it?" asked Riker. He felt bad about giving the captain a hard time; especially now, given Riker's relationship with Crusher.

Crusher wrinkled her brow. "It's difficult to say," she replied. "But I think over time, he'll get used to the idea."

Riker nodded. "Same with Deanna. She'll want us to be happy."

So each prepared words and waited for the time to come.

Chapter Text

When Riker was ready, he decided to meet with Troi in her quarters. He went through his duties that day in a sort of half-fog, his mind on their future conversation.

Finally, his shift ended, and he walked the corridors, feeling a little bit of a nervous sweat as he reached her doorway and rang the chime.

Of course Deanna sensed this, and so she had an idea of why he had come.

"Come in," she said, smiling in preparation.

Riker entered, wearing clothes from Nahaleit. "Hi Deanna, do you have some time?" He rubbed his hands together to release tension.

"Absolutely! Come in and sit down," said Troi, motioning to a spot beside her. She lay down the PADD she was reading, and stretched her arms. She assessed her own emotions- she felt calm and accepting. Whatever he'd come to say, she was as ready to hear it as she would ever be.

Riker took a seat next to Troi. He looked at her intently and took a breath...

"How've you been?" he asked. Better to start off light.

"Well, I guess," said Troi with a shrug. "And yourself?"

"I've been doing a lot better," replied Riker. "Life is starting to make sense again."

"Oh, good!" said Troi, smiling. "How did that happen?"

Riker paused. "Well, for one I'm getting used to being back on the Enterprise. Being indoors all the time. And…just everything. Things are a lot different here."

Troi nodded. "I'm glad to hear that it's getting better."

Riker nodded. "And…" he added slowly, "I've also reconnected with Beverly."

Troi eyed Riker. "And how has that been?" Her heart was starting to pound with anticipation.

"It's been good," replied Riker. "In fact, it's been very good-"

Suddenly he stopped. "Wait, hold on," he said, jumping to his feet.

Troi was startled. "What's wrong?"

"This approach," answered Riker. He rubbed his face, shaking his head. "This just isn't me!" He let out a long breath and started to pace the room.

"Alright," Troi acknowledged, confused. "Well then please be yourself. You're scaring me!"

"Sorry." Riker paced the room a while longer, his thoughts spinning. Finally, he let out a sigh and returned to his seat.

"Deanna, do you remember when Captain Picard told us about the future he'd seen?" He'd told them about a love triangle between Worf, Troi and Riker that ended very badly.

"Yes," replied Troi with a grimace. It wasn't something she liked to think about.

"And remember, you and I decided to forgo the drama and just be friends?" continued Riker.

"Yes, of course I remember!" answered Troi. It was one of the most important moments in her life.

Riker took Troi's hand. "I just want you to know that you'll always be dear to me. You're by far the closest friend I've ever had," he said, looking deeply into her eyes.

Troi smiled curiously at Riker. "I feel the same way about you. But you sound like you're preparing to end our friendship."

"No, not at all," said Riker, shaking his head. He hesitated. Out with it, Riker!

He took a deep breath before continuing. "What I'm saying is that Beverly and I were together in Nahaleit, and we're together again now. Romantically. And I wanted to be the one to tell you," he said, blurting it all out at once. 

Then he looked cautiously into Troi's eyes.

Troi blinked a few times. The news hit her like a wave- it wasn't unexpected, but it had an impact nonetheless.

She let out a slow breath. "I see," she said, assessing herself for damage. It hurt a little, but less than she had expected.

"Well," continued Troi, "I'm happy for the two of you!" She fixed her mouth into a smile.

Riker studied her response. "I'm sure it feels a little weird, though."

Troi let out a small laugh. "Yes, I'll admit that it does." She'd lost her spot as the number one woman in his life... and to Beverly!

"Are you angry?" asked Riker cautiously.

Troi looked inward. "No," she replied honestly. "No, I'm not angry."

She was telling the truth; Riker could see it in her eyes.

"Good," he said, partially relieved. "And we're still friends?"

"Imzadi, of course we’re still friends!" she said, elbowing him in a playful way.

Riker let out a breath. Only one question to go...

"I guess it's none of my business...but if you don't mind my asking, will this affect your friendship with Beverly?" he asked. He held his breath in anticipation.

Troi shifted in her seat. "I don't think so," she replied. "Not on my end, anyway." She'd need to touch base with Beverly outside of the counseling office.

"That’s great to hear," said Riker, relieved. He was pretty sure Crusher would want things to stay the same between them...which he thought was good. He didn't want any friendships to be sacrificed.

"Anyway, I'm glad you found each other," said Troi with sincerity. She smiled again, feeling both happy and sad.

Riker beamed. "Thank you! That really means a lot to me." He put his arm around her and gave her a squeeze.

Troi nodded, thinking about how much she adored both Riker and Crusher. It was going to take some adjustment...but she was grateful just to have them back in her life.

Chapter Text

The next day, Crusher and Troi had their conversation. To their mutual joy, they each discovered that despite the awkwardness, the other was committed to maintaining their friendship. 

For Crusher, it was a huge relief…almost. Tucked away in the back of her mind, and sometimes the front, was the knowledge that she still needed to tell Picard. She spent another week this way, until finally the fear of him accidentally discovering the truth compelled her into action. So she made plans with him to have lunch and then take a walk in the arboretum.

When the day came, Crusher found herself in good spirits. She enjoyed their picnic lunch and the 'sunny' afternoon as she bided her time, waiting for the right moment to make her announcement.

Meanwhile, Picard was enjoying their outing, but not entirely. He'd known Beverly a long time, and he could tell that she was preparing to deliver some sort of news. What was it? She was certainly taking her time to reveal it. In the meantime, there was nothing he could do but wait.

They were sitting on a bench under the shade of a tree when Crusher decided that the time was right. 

"Jean-Luc," she began. 

"Mmm?" asked Picard. He sat up straight, preparing for the blow.

"There's something I want to tell you." She took a deep breath in anticipation, thinking it would be best to keep this short and simple.

"Yes," he said impatiently. "What is it?"

She paused. "As you know, Will and I were in Nahaleit for a long time."

A fear crept into Picard's mind, but it was at bay for now. He listened intently as she continued.

She took a breath. "We started out as friends, but it became something more."

Picard's throat went dry.

"And we're still together," finished Crusher. She tapped her toes on the ground, then slowly attempted to meet his gaze.

Picard averted his eyes as he sat soundless in thought.

Crusher let out a breath as she held the silence, awaiting his response. She rubbed her hands together to release some of the tension.

"Well, thank you for telling me," he said finally. The silence returned, and he sat with a stony expression.

Crusher tried again to meet his gaze. "I know it seemed like you and I might-" 

"No it didn't!" interrupted Picard. "Not really."

Crusher stared at the ground. So far, this wasn't going well.

Picard softened his voice. "I suppose it did for a while. Then I remembered- you were always unattainable to me."

Crusher wasn’t sure what to say. She thought of Picard's glimpse into the (defunct) future, which revealed that they married, then divorced… 

Which was probably difficult. Crusher hoped that ultimately, this way would be gentler.

"I've been reading more contemporary poetry," continued Picard. "And by more contemporary, I mean 21st century." He glanced at Crusher and they both chuckled.

Picard tilted his head, gazing at the tree branches above. "And I quote," he began.

I dream of you in silence of night

Shimmering and dancing in light

Near within my grasp to reach

You fade away before my sight

Crusher sat in contemplation but didn’t respond. She really didn’t know what to say.

"So you and Will, eh?" asked Picard with a half-smile. Of course Riker had been with her!

Crusher nodded. "Will and me," she confirmed, smiling. "Life is full of surprises!"

Picard nodded. "That it is," he agreed. His voice became serious. "Is he treating you well?"

"Yes," replied Crusher, smiling. "He treats me very well." She was touched by Picard's concern. He really was a good friend.

"Glad to hear it." Suddenly, Picard remembered Riker's behavior upon returning from Nahaleit. This was why Riker treated him as if he were the enemy! 

That hurt. There was no reason to deny it. It simply wouldn't do for that to continue.

"And, congratulations!" said Picard definitively. He rubbed Crusher's shoulders, determined to demonstrate his full support.

Chapter Text

With Picard and Troi in support, Riker and Crusher felt at ease. And as they did, it became apparent to others that there was something special about their 'close' friendship…which, of course, became a topic of gossip and speculation. 

Strangely, Worf felt the worst of it. He noticed that for some reason, humans preferred to ask a couple's friends rather than the couple themselves. He found this to be highly irritating.

"Commander," called Worf one morning as he approached Riker in the corridor. "Do you have a moment?"

Riker turned to see Worf walking quickly toward him. "Certainly Mr. Worf," he replied. They ducked around a corner to where there was no one in sight. "What's on your mind?"

Worf sighed. "Forgive me for asking, sir, but are you and Dr. Crusher a couple?"

"What?" asked Riker innocently. "Why do you ask?"

“Sir,” continued Worf, "At least three times per day, I am accosted by crewmembers who are requesting to know.'"

"Just tell them you don't know, Worf," said Riker, patting him on the back.

"I do sir," said Worf, with growing frustration. He paused.

He'd known Commander Riker a long time. He felt within his rights to ask...

"Commander, is there a reason why you keep it a secret?" asked Worf. It seemed to him that this was getting out of hand.

Riker paused in thought. There was a reason before…but was there now?

"No, I suppose there's not," he replied after a moment. He looked at Worf with appreciation. "Thank you!” Riker gave him a sharp nod and walked away.

That night, Riker and Crusher talked it over as they ate dinner. Picard and Troi already knew, and they took it in stride. There was no reason the rest of the crew couldn't know too.

So Riker and Crusher made sure to attend the next few events together. They held hands, they embraced, and they verbally confirmed that they were together. News spread quickly, and other than a few envious people, the crew loved it!

Worf thought this was fine; he believed Riker and Crusher to be a good match. Still, he was plagued with a troubling thought...

Worf used to mate with Troi. Troi used to mate with Riker. Riker was mating with Crusher. Crusher perhaps used to mate with Picard...

They were too close! They were still his friends, but he needed room to breathe.

Around the same time, he began to have frequent dreams about the Klingon Empire. There were people that he wanted to see, places where he wanted to go. 

Then came the day of his decision- he woke one morning knowing it was time to leave. Worf invited Alexander to join him on a discovery quest in the Klingon Empire. After some time and thought, Alexander accepted. 

Three days later, they were gone.