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“You know, I had an interesting conversation with Aquaman today,” Bruce said casually. He wasn’t looking at Dick, his attention seemingly focused on cutting his steak.
But Dick knew better. Bruce never did anything casually. The young hero (not a sidekick, thank you very much) had been frozen, spoon full of soup halfway to his mouth. Whatever this was, it was some kind of trap. Dick wasn’t one to lie down and die.
“Really? What happened? Did he fight another sea monster?” Dick asked, like he had no clue what Bruce was talking about. Which, to be fair, he didn’t but he had a hunch it had something to do with Teen Titans.
“Arthur claims that he didn’t fight the last sea monster, he had a strong disagreement with it.” Bruce’s tone made it sound like he didn’t believe that. “But no. It was him demanding to know why I didn’t like rock music.”
It took all of Dick’s willpower not to burst out laughing. With a performance that could’ve made Bruce proud under a different circumstance, Dick said, “Huh. That’s random. Why would that even come up?”
“Aquaman got word that some poachers might have connections in Gotham. He mentioned possibly coming here to Aqualad, who warned him about my hatred of rock music.”
“Hatred?”
“Yes, apparently I find it morally abhorrent like some sort of conservative preacher from the fifties.” Bruce now looked at his young protege. “I wonder why Aqualad would tell him such a strange thing. He doesn’t seem like the type to play a prank on his king.”
Uh-oh. Dick knew that tone of voice. Bruce didn’t have to wonder about anything. He already had a theory. Dick wasn’t one to crack under pressure however. The tricky thing was not throwing Garth under the bus. This was Dick’s fault in the first place. He didn’t know Garth would take his jokes seriously.
Though, maybe Dick should’ve seen that coming. It took Garth months to realize the alias “Garth Brooks” that Roy kept suggesting was based on the country singer, Garth Brooks. Roy and Wally laughed until Garth dumped a bathtub worth of water on them. Dick was proud of Garth for that. Maybe Garth hadn't actually believed it and told Aquman for laugh. Dick didn't Garth expected Aquaman to actually get on the phone (or whatever they had in Atlantis) and confront Batman.
Anyway, Dick needed to think of something quick. “Well, no offense, Bruce but, you kinda give off a very…how to put it? Serious image. Maybe he just assumed that.”
“So, you didn’t say anything to him?”
Bruce knew. And he knew that Dick knew he knew. But Dick wasn’t quite ready to concede defeat. “Why would you think that?” he asked with all the innocence a person from Gotham could have.
“Because I have learned far more about Aquaman, the Flash, Wonder Woman and especially Green Arrow then I’ve ever wanted to and half of that information came from you relaying things their proteges have told you.”
Dick briefly looked away in embarrassment. “I couldn’t have told you that much…”
“If your fellow Titans talk about their mentors in less than flattering ways, it stands to reason that you would too. I remember you being very irate about me asking you to turn down the music in your room.”
Asking implied that it wasn’t an order. The music hadn’t even been that loud. You could barely hear it in the halls. Dick thought of trying to deny Bruce’s accusation, but Bruce wouldn’t believe it. “Okay. I may have talked about it.”
Bruce raised a single eyebrow, his expression distinctly unamused.
“Okay, I did talk about it. It happened so often it became kind of a joke. A rock song would come on and someone would joke, “Oh, don’t let Batman hear that.” It was a dumb inside joke. I didn’t mean for Aqualad to take it seriously. Sorry.”
There was silence for a second. Bruce had mastered oppressive silences. He couldn’t look at Bruce. He had always tried to be the most mature of the Titans so his dumb little jokes and complaints being turned into Justice League drama was humiliating.
Bruce finally broke the silence. “This week, you’ll do one more hour of volunteer work at Dr. Thompkins’s clinic than usual.”
Dick waited for more. Yet, Bruce kept looking at him passively. “That’s it?”
“You’ll also practice acting more.” Bruce said as he got up. “You were terrible at lying.”
“I wasn’t that-” Dick shook his head, “Wait, so you actually don’t care?”
“I wasn’t thrilled with being yelled at by the king of a nation for my taste in music. Especially when it wasn’t even true. Still, that was more Aquaman’s fault than yours.”
“Huh. So you actually like Rock music?”
“Not at the volume you play it at, no,” Bruce deadpanned. “But normally I have no problem with it. In fact, you should listen to Nirvana if you're going to listen to rock. Their lyrics are quite powerful.”
Dick laughed but as he watched Bruce walk away, he stopped. “Do you actually like Nirvana?”
Alfred, who missed most of the embarrassing conversation, started cleaning up the table. “Don’t mind him, Master Dick. Master Bruce used to play his “music” even louder than you do it. In my personal opinion, it was also much harder to tolerate. I still curse whoever came up with Death Metal or whatever it was called.”
Dick simply stared at him for a moment. “You guys are messing with me, right? As payback for the rock joke. Alfred?”
Alfred simply walked away though Dick could swear he saw a smile on the butler’s face.