Archive of Our Own ^beta

She was an idiot, of that Kiara was sure by now.

She was an absolute idiot for thinking that coming to this party would have been a good idea, ‘cause no sane person with a sane mind would’ve ever brought themselves into this situation; but that was the problem though, she was way past the point of being sane.
Everything in the past few months had slowly brought her closer and closer to the brink of a mental breakdown, she could hardly even recognize herself.

Although her life had been completely shit since the moment she stepped foot into her new school, there was a brief period of time when things didn’t seem to be so bad which happened to be her short three months of friendship with none other than the Kook princess herself, Sarah Cameron.
From the very first day at the Kook Academy (like JJ once called it) she became the school target, the new girl who slummed with the Pogues in the Cut and who apparently was also a stuck up bitch with a superiority complex, no one had ever made an effort to actually get to know her and she was soon left with no option but to bite the bullet and hope to survive the three years of high school she was forced to endure in that hell.

However one day, completely out of the blue and when she was probably at her lowest point, Sarah Cameron had come into her life like some miraculous angel saving her from her despair and it didn’t take long for the two to become best friends.

Against all odds they had a lot in common and they loved being around each other, during the time she spent being friends with Sarah things were good; they stopped making fun of her, she got to know more people, she was invited to parties and she even dared to say she was quite popular in school. She quickly turned from the biggest loser she knew to being the queen’s sidekick.

That didn’t last long though, before she knew it her supposedly best friend dumped her without any second thought, for no reason at all she cut her off from her clique and as if it wasn’t enough already, she also started spreading rumors to the entire school about Kiara being a snitch who ruined her birthday party.
When she returned to class the Monday following Sarah’s birthday, she immediately realized that not only she was back to square one, somehow it was even worse ‘cause now they had an apparent reason to hate her.

She had never felt more of an idiot than she did at the time, she honestly thought that she had found a true friend in Sarah, someone who cared about her and loved her. Then just like that it was all gone. She was left wondering if it had even been real at all; maybe it was all a big plan to make her the butt of the joke.

Ever since that day she had been miserable, school became a nightmare once again, she was alone and with no one to talk to.

The worst thing was that she knew damn well she once had people who loved her unconditionally, who cherished her and were always willing to listen to her and yet she had slowly detached herself from them as soon as Kook Barbie started paying the slightest bit of attention to her. To this day that was her biggest regret.

She selfishly let go of her best friends for some validation from people she didn’t even care about, for a while she also believed she deserved to be abandoned and it was just the consequences for her own actions, some sort of Karma.

Now she was constantly lonely, depressed and angry with the world all the fucking time.

Her days were pretty much all the same: wake up, go to school, work at the Wreck, go to bed and again and again and again in the same boring loop.
She didn’t even remember when was the last time she had gone out to do something fun with someone her age.

Which is what brought her in the terrible situation she was currently in.
When only an hour ago she was sitting on her bed scrolling through Instagram and watching yet another party where the entire school but her seemed to be invited, she felt her blood boiling, no other way to put it.

Ultimately it was when she saw a post with a picture of Sarah smiling cheek to cheek with Brooklyn Mayers that she lost it.
Sarah hated that girl, always had and always will of that she was sure; she never missed an opportunity to remind everyone how much she found her insufferable with her bigotry and now she was at her party enjoying their night together.

Brooklyn was invited at her house but she wasn’t? She lost it.

Without even question it she just got up from her bed, put on the shortest black dress she owned, sneaked out of her house and walked all the way to Tanny Hill.
If no one was gonna invite her, she’d gladly invite herself.

The resolution and the determination that had been fueling her up until that moment however left her body from the very first second she stepped into the house, all eyes on her. She could see everyone sneering everywhere she went, people whispering to each other grinning and laughing in her face without any hesitation.

She felt like an idiot standing there all alone in the crowd with nothing to do, no one to talk to, no one to dance with, no one to try and flirt with just for a bit of fun.
Kiara immediately understood what that saying "feeling alone in a crowded room" meant.

She quickly made it into the kitchen where significantly less people were filling up the space and without a better option to occupy her time, she just started drinking.
It was was after her third beer and second glass of Bacardi mixed with cranberry juice when Sarah found her sitting in a corner in the living room and made a scene in front of everyone.

She basically yelled in her face that she wasn’t welcomed and she had to leave before she gave her a taste of her own medicine and have her escorted out by cops.
In front of all those people looking at them amused by the show, she just got up completely mortified and made her way towards the door, but not before stopping by the kitchen again to grab another drink to wash down her sorrow.

She would have made it out with no problem and ready to call it a night if it wasn’t for Rafe.
He was standing in the entryway with his friends loudly chatting and laughing when he caught sight of her.

During the time Kiara had been friends with his sister she had spent a lot of time in their home and the only way she had to describe Rafe was a creep.
He was older by a couple of years and yet it never stopped him from checking her out in her bikini when she was lounging by the pool or hitting on her when Sarah was out of earshot. No matter how many times she rejected him, he was insisting and pushy.
She always tried her best to never be left alone with him, she hated to admit it but to some degree she was scared of Rafe.
She had no doubt that he was the type of guy who would take advantage of you without hesitation and then also ruin your life with it for good measure.

She knew it was written all over her face how intoxicated she was, her vision was blurry and she was sure she was wobbly on her feet, the last drink she was still holding in her hands really did it ‘cause she was starting to feel herself slowly getting detached from reality.

Of course Rafe noticed all that and it also didn’t get lost on him the fact that she was completely alone.
She saw him smiling at her and mumbling something into Kelce's ear when he then started walking in her direction; she immediately turned on her heels trying to get as far away as possible from him.

"Hey Kie" he yelled from behind her but she ignored him entirely and kept walking.

Good thing was she knew all the corridors and all the rooms hiding behind the doors of this house. She clumsily run up to the second floor and locked herself inside the main bathroom, the first room to the left of the stairs.

She was terrified, she saw the look in Rafe’s eyes and recognized it as the same one he had when she once saw him drag a wasted Lucy Trevor into his room at another party.
Kiara knew she was a sitting duck and at some point she’d have to get out of there and he’d probably be waiting.
Defeated by that realization she just slumped down on the floor resting her back on the bathtub and rubbing her face with her hands.

One thing she also knew for a fact was that she definitely exaggerated with her drinking, the echo of the music coming from downstairs was making her head pound painfully and her eyes were growing heavier and heavier by the minute, now that she was sitting down she was also aware of how difficult it would be to get back on her feet with how much the room was spinning.
For a brief moment she even considered calling her mother, it was an emergency after all and she always said to call her no matter what if she was in danger but then at the hypothetical image of her mom walking into the party to drag her home in front of everyone she quickly let go of that idea.
She was already the school clown as it was, no need to add fuel to the fire.

She unlocked her phone hoping to come up with something and as if the universe was trying to send her some sort of signal she received a notification from her photo gallery that said "on this day".

She opened up the photo and her eyes immediately watered. It was a picture of JJ sprawled out on the pullout couch, he was giving the middle finger to the camera but had the biggest grin on his face. It was a screenshot from a video she took on this precise date a year ago while they were smoking at the Chateau and just messing around, she remembered in that exact moment John B was yelling at them for smoking inside the house and she blamed JJ for it who in turn gave her the finger and threw her a pillow; later that night she screenshotted that frame finding JJ’s dimples too adorable to not be  captured in a still image.

Now a year later she was sitting alone in a bathroom hiding from the world, and more specifically from Rafe Cameron, with no one to come and help her.

A year ago there would’ve been three boys ready to jump to her rescue without any second thought.

Lingering on the picture on her screen for a second she wondered if he’d still come for her, would he show up if she asked?

She knew it wasn’t fair and part of her felt like it would be almost like taking advantage of him ‘cause JJ had a heart of gold and rarely considered his own feelings when it came to the ones he loved and their safety.
Although she wasn’t even sure if he had any affection left for her anymore.

Just when she was about to abandon the idea entirely and put her phone down she heard footsteps in the hallway and Rafe’s voice calling for her, if her intuition was right he had walked into Sarah’s bedroom down the hall which left her once again incredibly scared so without thinking about it too much she made a split second decision.

She scrolled through her contacts and once she found his name she quickly clicked on it bringing the phone up to her ear. It was ringing which was a good sign but as she waited and waited for him to pick it up, it never happened.
It kept ringing for almost an entire minute before the obnoxious robotic voice recited "the number you are calling is currently unavailable please leave a message after the tone" followed by the beep.

She didn’t know what made her so determined all of a sudden, maybe it was the urgency of the situation, but refusing to give up she tried again.

It was only after the second call that JJ woke up.

He was sleeping in what used to be Big John’s bedroom which now he claimed as his own when all of a sudden he felt the phone vibrate under his pillow, when he squinted his eyes in front of the lit up screen he immediately thought of two options: either he was still asleep or this was a sick joke.

After almost 8 months of complete silence from her part she was currently calling him at 1:00 a.m. for who knew what reason.

His first reaction was of complete anger ‘cause he actually had a bit of a suspicion on what might be the reason behind her calls.
Lately he had been selling weed to Topper Thornton and his minions and he also recently heard about him macking on Sarah Cameron, Kiara’s new bestie.
He knew of a house party happening on Figure 8 that night so it didn’t take much for him to put two and two together. She had some guts to call him as it was nothing to just treat him like a drug dealer from the Cut ready to jump at her request.

He threw his phone back onto the mattress facing the screen down and ignored it when he felt it buzz for the third time.
Once the third attempt call ended the sound of a notification echoed into the room and against his best effort at pretending he never heard a thing, curiosity got the best of him.
He grabbed the phone back and saw that there was a message left in the voicemail, he spent a moment pondering on what to do but eventually he just surrendered and pressed play.

It wasn’t the message he was expecting at all, it was confusing to say the least.

At first she didn’t say anything, all he could hear was muffled music in the background and her heavy breathing but then he heard it, her voice.

"Mmh hey, I- JJ, I… you didn’t pick up so I just- I’m doing this" she was stumbling over her words and she sounded distant, he could immediately tell she was wasted and she was in a confusional state "I can’t get out and I’m locked in here but I don’t know what to do ‘cause he’s after me."

Then his heart stopped for a second ‘cause she gasped while he also heard someone in the background starting to bang on the door and calling her name.
He would’ve recognized that voice anywhere, it was Rafe Cameron.

His blood froze in his veins and although he was still confused about the dynamics of the situation he realized she was in some sort of danger; he panicked even more when the message completely cut out.

JJ wasted no time, he got up to grab a shirt and while already putting his boots on he held his phone between his shoulder and head calling her number back.
He was sure he only started breathing again after she picked up.

"JJ…" she said in a small voice almost incredulous,

"Kie? Where are you? Is Rafe there?" he asked frantically making his way out of the house grabbing the key for the Twinkie.

"I‘m at Tanny Hill but Rafe’s gone now" she sounded two seconds from falling asleep.

"Ok what happened?" her answer doing nothing to clear up his confusion.

"I - I think I drank too much" she mumbled and then added "and I locked myself in the bathroom upstairs but I can’t get out, Rafe is looking for me."

"Alright Kie, listen to me! Stay exactly where you are and don’t get out until I get there, ok?" he instructed her already driving towards the house.

"You coming?" she whispered in disbelief and it almost made his eyes water.

He sighed and trying to stay focused without letting his emotions take over he simply reassured her.

"Yeah, I’m on my way. You just stay ther- Kie? Kiara?" She hang up on him and he pushed his foot on the accelerator definitely harder than it was allowed by the law.

He made it to Figure 8 faster than he ever did in his life and he quickly abandoned the Twinkie at the front gate. Once he was inside it was difficult to make his way through the crowd, it seemed like the whole island was there.
Another slight problem was that he was definitely catching some attention, he wasn’t exactly part of this type of crowd and a few heads turned in his direction while he tried to get upstairs unnoticed.

Thankfully no one stopped him or questioned it too much so once he was on the second floor he knocked on the first door he found and luckily it was the right one.

"Kie? Are you in there? It’s JJ" he said knocking.

She didn’t reply but he heard the lock turning and when he opened the door she was there, kneeling on the floor next to the toilet. He quickly got inside closing the door behind him but never getting his eyes off of her.

She looked absolutely wrecked, her hair was thrown in a messy bun, some of her mascara was smudged under her eyes and it looked like she had been crying, her gaze was also incredibly hazy. He didn’t remember ever seeing her like that.

"I threw up a little" she muttered looking down and flushing the toilet, she was embarrassed.

While driving there JJ had been wondering what it'd feel like seeing her again after so long, he was sure there would have been some anger in there and he was more than ready to give her the cold shoulder. He’d do the bare minimum to get her home and call it a night.  

Now standing in front of her crouched on the floor with a blank stare and feeling the burn of humiliation for her state, he felt his chest tighten at the sight.
She looked so small and defenseless and it broke his heart almost not recognizing the girl in front of him.

He couldn’t help but wonder what happened to his Kie? The one who always had a fierce expression on her face, who always made it out of trouble on her own and would bite their heads off if they ever tried playing knights in shining armor, the one who would always be the life of the party surrounded by friends he didn’t even know where she’d known them from.

This girl scared, alone and crying for help was far from the Kiara that he last saw all those months ago.

In front of that painful realization his resentment towards her actions momentarily vanished and he was replaced by a strong desire to just comfort her and bring her to safety.

"It’s ok. Nothing I haven’t done before" he said with a reassuring smile while sitting down next to her.

She raised her head and raked her eyes all over his face as if to make sure he was truly there

"You really came?" And she couldn't stop the single tear that rolled down her cheek. "Why?"

"Because you needed me and I don’t leave people behind" he knew it was uncalled for right in that moment but even though he was softened by the sight in front of him, it still didn’t mean he was ready to pretend like nothing ever happened or that they were just back to normal.

"I’m sorry" she simply said looking into his eyes and when she asked him the next question he had to control his own tears. "Do you hate me?"

Once again he wondered who was this insecure and fragile person standing in front of him, the thought of her believing she was hated and by him nonetheless shuttered him.
Was he disappointed by how things went between them? Yes. But he knew that in his heart he had already forgiven her right then and there.

The knowledge that she had been in danger and her first thought was to call him was somehow reassuring.
She hadn’t forgotten about him and he still meant something for her, so he was mainly left with questions about what brought her to distance herself. Why was she gone if she still cared?

He spent so much time believing she had abandoned them 'cause she simply found something better and then here she was, crying at the idea of not having his affection.

"I could never hate you, Kie" he whispered taking a piece of hair that escaped from her bun and bringing it behind her ear.

He was looking at her with so much tenderness that it was hard to hold his gaze, she was ashamed of the way she had treated him and the boys and despite all that he was still here for her. When he entered the bathroom earlier she couldn’t deny she had felt an immediate sense of relief, for a moment she thought she was back were she belonged. Safe with a friend.

Were they still friends?

"I don’t know, I’ve fucked up real good this time" she shrugged and he chuckled at her small joke.

She had missed his laugh.

"Yeah, you did…" he sighed heavily "but someone once told me that friends need to understand each other and they forgive each other all the time"

She couldn’t believe he remembered.
That’s what she had told him the first time they had their very first big fight.

They were in seventh grade and after confessing to JJ her crush on Matt, one of their classmates, he thought it'd be a great idea to tell the entire class.
She didn’t speak to him for a whole week until Pope and John B came up with a plan to leave them alone during lunch and once they made up he asked her a question that broke her heart "so do you still want to be my friend?" and she never recalled seeing him so vulnerable before; in that moment she realized that JJ’s brain was built to believe that once you fuck up people throw you away so she just told him what she believed instead: friends forgive and understand each other.

She knew there was absolutely no comparison between a 12 years old JJ snitching on her crush and the pain she knew she had caused him for close to an entire year, yet he was fully embracing her philosophy.

"Should we go home?" he asked her bringing her back to the present.

She just nodded and after he got up he also helped her onto her own feet.
She could barely hold her weight and he had to put an arm around her waist to guide her down the stairs.

They had almost reached the door going fairly unnoticed when Rafe spotted them from the living room and called her name once again.

"Forget what I said, if you throw up on me Kie, I swear I’ll never forgive you!"  JJ said randomly

His words confused her but before she could even ask any question he just hoisted her up on his shoulder, holding her thighs with his arms and making a run for it. That’s what he meant.
She couldn’t deny the motion was actually making her sick and she had to conjure all her willpower to not vomit on his back.

Only when they made it outside and in front of the Twinkie he put her back down but she held tight on his hand to not fall back on her ass, the whole surrounding was spinning.

"Sorry ‘bout that" he said not being sorry at all and then he opened the passenger seat to help her climb in.

Once they were out of the Cameron’s driveway she stopped him before he could take a turn toward her house.

"I can’t go home, JJ."

"What do you mean?" He asked furrowing his eyebrows.

"If my parents see me like this I’m dead" she said slumping further into the seat.

"Ok, I know where we can go" he told her dismissively and just trusting him to take her somewhere safe she closed her eyes and dozed off.

When she opened her eyes again JJ was already jumping out of the van and she took in where they were. They were parked in front of the Chateau and all of a sudden so many different emotions hit her all at once.

The first one was panic ‘cause her mind immediately went to Big John and the trouble they’d be in if he found them there at this hour of the night and pissed drunk out of all things, then she was hit with a wave of immense guilt for momentarily forgetting that Big John wasn’t there at all and he hadn’t been for a while, but when JJ opened up the door and helped her inside of the house all the negative thoughts left her brain. She immediately felt at home.
Everything was exactly how she remembered and for a moment it felt like time had stopped and it was only yesterday that she was here throwing a wet towel on the floor and going in the small kitchen to make pancakes for the boys.

JJ shook her out of her thoughts by putting a finger to his mouth and then pointing to John B’s bedroom basically telling her to be quiet ‘cause he was sleeping in there.

She was surprised when he brought her to Big John’s room, that was the only room in the house she had never been into ‘cause it seemed disrespectful and a total invasion of privacy but even without knowing what it looked like before she could tell that JJ had somehow made it his own.
There were some posters on the wall that were undeniably picked by a teenage boy and there were clothes scattered all over the floor, she quickly wondered how bad things were at home for him if he basically had moved in with John B.

She absentmindedly plopped down on the bed and almost moaned out loud for how good it felt to finally lie down, she would have fallen asleep immediately if it wasn’t for how uncomfortable her dress was.

JJ was ready to leave the room and go to sleep on the pullout when Kie suddenly sat up and started taking her dress straps off her shoulders one by one, leaving him completely shocked.

"Kie! What are you doing?" he whispered to her apprehensively, that was a strong and immediate reminder of how intoxicated she still was.

"This thing is uncomfortable" she simply said as if it made all the sense in the world to get undressed in front of him.

"Ok ok, wait" he stopped her quickly and going to his dresser to get a pair of joggers and a t-shirt to toss at her "there you go"

"Thanks" she said with a smile taking his clothes.

He was sure she’d wait for him to get out of the room to change but instead she just put the top on and wiggled out of her dress letting it fall from underneath the t-shirt and giving him a full sight of her underwear.
He turned around and waited for her to be done. This night was testing him in more ways than one.

"Done?" he asked her a few seconds later

"Yup" she replied sounding so naive

He turned back to face her and saw her climbing under the sheets, content with that knowing she was finally safe and sound under John B’s roof he went to leave the bedroom for the couch.

"Alright, good night Kie"

"Wait" she said when he was already halfway out the door and looking at him biting her bottom lip nervously.

"Can- can’t you stay here?" she then hesitantly added and to be fair she didn’t know why she was asking, all she knew was that having him close was bring her comfort.

He looked back and forth between the bed and the corridor a couple of times before he surrendered and closed the door behind him, getting under the sheets next to her.

"Thank you" she whispered

"No problem, just don’t take all the covers"

She giggled and shuffled closer to him; he had absolutely no idea of what to do with himself.
He just stood there laying on his side trying to move as little as possible and just when he was sure she had fallen asleep, she broke the silence again.

"Thank you, JJ"

"You already said that" he said letting out a breathy chuckle.

"No, I mean for tonight. For everything."

He opened his eyes and found hers already staring back at him; she still seemed insecure and a little embarrassed so he quickly reassured her.

"That’s what friends are for" he shrugged as best as he could in his position.

"So we’re still friends?" she asked and her eyes got glossy once again.

At that point he couldn’t resist anymore, he brought an arm around her back and held her tightly to his chest.

"I’ll always be your friend" he whispered in her hair "I’m not saying I’m completely over what happened but Kie, you’re always welcomed here. You can always come back at any moment. We're here."

He heard her sniffling in the crook of his neck and as if it wasn’t enough for him to melt she whispered back "I’ve lost myself without you guys"

"Well, then we’ll find her back" he said after a moment he took to himself to find the right words.

He didn’t know where he was getting the courage from but he felt like it was the right thing to do so without thinking about it too much he left a kiss on the top of her head.
After that they just kept holding each other until he realized she had fallen asleep.

If someone that morning would have told JJ that the day would’ve ended with Kie in his bed sleeping in his arms, he quite frankly would’ve probably punched them in the face; now however it felt like the most normal thing in the world.

He spent so much time wondering if she’d ever come back, if they’d ever go back at being friends and most importantly if he could ever find it within himself to forgive her, but now he also felt like a bit of an idiot for never wondering if she was hurting, if she wasn’t around because there was something more going on with her.
In light of what he saw tonight he couldn’t help but feel like in someway they had abandoned her just as much as she had abandoned them.

Kie always did the most for them when things were rough and now he was asking himself if they had done enough for her, if maybe they should have been more present when things in her life started shifting so fast. Had they failed to see how much she was hurting?
Maybe this was more than one person’s fault and they all had something to learn from it. He realized that when he saw her again tonight and found a person he barely recognized, someone who was struggling.

He always pictured himself staying mad at her for a long time had she ever decided to come back and knowing himself he knew that forgiveness wasn’t something that came easily to him and yet when he saw her broken and lonely, he didn’t have it in him to fight it.

She had saved him so many times throughout his life, from the smallest things like making him copy her homework to not fail a class to quite literally bringing him back from spiraling every time he believed it wasn't worth living anymore.

He knew he had fucked up many times in his life and yet she always stood by his side. This time Kiara was the one fucked up and she was right, she fucked up big time but realizing it had to do with something deeper that troubled her, he just knew he couldn’t abandon her either; this was his turn to stand by her side and help her back on her feet.
They’d start back together, like they always did and with those hopeful thoughts he fell asleep a short time later lulled by her breathing and with a sense of peace he hadn’t felt in a while.

When he woke up the next morning they were still in the same position they had fallen asleep in, she was still in his arms and he was still holding her close to his chest.
However nature was calling and thankfully he successfully managed to get out of bed without waking her up.

After a quick stop to the bathroom her walked into the kitchen only to find both Pope and John B already there, the latter pouring coffee into a cup before joining the other at the dining table.

"Morning" he announced himself walking towards the counter to fix himself some coffee as well without making eye contact with either of his friends.

"Finally you rise from the dead" Pope joked but before he could reply John B had beaten him to the punch.

"You look nervous JJ, any reason at all?" he asked with a knowing smirk on his face.

Admittedly he was a bit nervous 'cause he forgot to ask Kie the night before what her plan for the morning was, he didn't know if she preferred to just get out unnoticed or if she was ready to also face the rest of the Pogues.

"Mmmh no, why would I be nervous?" he shrugged trying to come across as completely unfazed by his insinuation.

"I don't know, you tell me. Anything to do with the girl you sneaked inside the house in the middle of the night?" John B plainly put it.

"WHAT? You have a girl in there right now?" Pope asked with wide eyes pointing at his bedroom.

At this point JJ was left with no other option but to come clean, with a heavy sigh and pinching the bridge of his nose he just started explaining the situation.

"Ok well yes, there's someone in there but it's not what you guys think. Something happened last night and I had to bring her here but it's not like that..."

"What happened?" "Who's in there?" both boys asked at the same time and as if on cue Kiara walked out of the bedroom in that exact moment.

She stopped dead in her tracks not expecting to find John B and Pope there, she naively thought she would've had a bit more time to really think about what to tell them but apparently she had thought wrong.
They were staring at her as if they had just seen a ghost and it brought a lump in her throat thinking that in some way it was kind of accurate. What right did she have to show up here unannounced after so long? She was sure John B would kick her out at any moment now.

She was frozen on her spot, not knowing what to do or what to say. The tension in her body was almost unbearable.

Eventually it was Pope who cleared his throat and broke the silence.

"I brought mom's waffles for breakfast" he said pointing at the covered up plate in front of him.

And that did it. The simplicity and normality in which he just invited her to have breakfast with them broke the dam. Before she could even realize it she started sobbing catching everyone off guard.

The first one to jump into action was John B who promptly wrapped her into a tight hug and started rocking her back and forth.

"Hey c'mon now, I know mama H waffles are good but no need to be so dramatic" he joked to lighten up the mood and she erupted into a loud laugh.

She couldn't even remember when was the last time she had laughed so freely and spontaneously.

Pope quickly joined them into the embrace and placing an affectionate kiss on her temple he also humored John B "If you preferred the pancakes you should've just said so"

They stayed like that for a while taking each other in before eventually she let go of them and drying her cheeks with both her hands she timidly offered her apology.

"I'm sorry. For everything" she said looking down and sensing her trouble to come up with something better to say JJ came to her rescue.

"How about we devour those waffles before they get cold and then we hit the surf? A Pogue lazy day" he asked hesitantly, part of him still worried she'd refuse and that last night was just a passing moment.

But with all her friends eyes on her she just nodded and with a shaky voice she agreed "it sounds perfect."

And the blinding smiles all three boys gave her almost brought her back to tears.

"Let's go baby, we're back!" John B yelled full of enthusiasm and clapping his hands he hurried all of them towards the table to finally eat.

She sat down between Pope and JJ and while they were having breakfast they slowly started taking turns in telling stories of what she had been missing in the past months, sometimes jumping in herself to add an anecdote of her own.
It was like time had never passed and they instantly went back into the same banter and complicity they had always shared since they were little kids.

In that moment sitting at that table surrounded by the people she loved the most on earth and who welcomed her back in a heartbeat without a second thought, she felt a genuine happiness she hadn't felt in a long time.

There was still a lot to talk about and explain but all that could wait for the time being 'cause now they had all the time in the world. She had all the time in the world.

JJ was right, she could find her old self back. She already felt like some parts of her were already healing now that she was back home.

Everything will be alright, now she was back exactly were she belonged.