Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

     Weeks after the encounter with that investigator in the rain Kaneki slinks through the shadows and back alleys of Tokyo. Well, she tries too. Touka had told her to start practicing if she wanted to keep to herself and not draw attention. Which she very much wanted to do. She was headed to a local convenience store to stock up on coffee grounds. She was in the middle of trying to place which direction she should be going when she heard the distant sounds of a fight and smelled-

     Blood. Human. Ghoul. The chemically preserved scent of a quinque.
 
     Scents she had learned to distinguish all in one night. Touka and Yomo had spent the better part of two hours both grilling and helping her to describe each one experienced that night in the rain, and pick them apart. She had done so until her head hurt her calm demeanor started to fade and she was on the verge of cursing them both the fuck out. But now, she was infinitely grateful. She was about to turn the other way when both the ghoul and the investigator crashed 20 feet to her left and forced her to duck out of sight. 
  
     She immediately recognized the investigator as the one she had had to fight to protect Touka about three weeks ago? A month? She didn't have time to ponder because he lifted his quinque - not the same as when we fought. A loaner? - and smashed the ghouls skull beneath him. The unknown ghoul's cheek was caved, his eye had exploded out of the socket. A second swing crumpled the top part of his skull. Killing him. She shuddered and moved back a small step. Fear raced through her veins at the speed of bullets as she heard the sound of an empty glass bottle clattering. Fuck fuck fuck I'm gonna die because I kicked a fucking bottle?!
  
     The investigator's head whipped around in her direction immediately. She knew he saw her because his face twisted from a post fight comedown to rage in an instant. She turned around and ran. 

     "Eyepatch!" He bellowed after her. She heard his longer strides catch up to her easily. It only took him seven steps. He grabbed her by her hair, pain shot through her scalp as she let out a scared and hurt yell. He turned her towards him forcefully and practically carried her by her throat and hair towards the wall. When he pinned her, her kakuhou was pushed into a brick that had jutted out of the wall. Stars exploded in her vision when her head hit the wall coupled with the agony of having such a sensitive area being dug into by concrete, preventing her from activating her kagune.

     For a moment they were both silent, panting and looking at each other. Two teal eyes met a singular grey one. He had one hand on her throat, slightly cutting her airway, the other - which had previously pulled her by her hair - was holding his quinque. It looked nasty. A half axe with a hammer at the back of the blade. 

     "Why did you spare me?" He growled out menacingly. A tear leaked from the corner of her exposed eye. His own twitched.

     "You're crying?" He said, condescending. "You killed my partner and you're crying?" His hand tightened on her throat, she tried to gasp and clawed at his hand, cursing herself for being so fucking weak. She mustered what of her voice would escape and said

     "I spared you because you're a person. I didn't want to be a k-killer-! I swear!" She rasped out around her bruising trachea. He sneered at her in response. She felt his quinque crush the top of her foot when he dropped it. The pain was so brutal her vision whited out and a ringing started in her ears. She didn't hear his belt buckle clinking open. Nor did she hear or see him unzipping his pants. She was too preoccupied trying to come back to her senses. The alleyway looked like it was spinning and she could barely see in this dark anyway. Her kakuhou burned where it was digging into the sharp concrete of the wall. Her head still throbbed and she was starting to feel dizzy from the lack of oxygen as well as all the overstimulating pain. 

     She didn't hear him rip her panties in half. She felt the harsh sting of them tearing away from under her Anteiku uniform skirt. She was distantly thankful she had changed into a lighter top because of the summer heat, making her workplace unidentifyable. 

     That was the only thing she had to be thankful for. He ripped her thighs apart so far her skirt ripped up the back, unable to handle the strain. In the next instant he was forcing himself inside her. The alleyway stopped spinning as she tried to push him away with a pained cry. He let go of her throat to grab both of her wrists and hold them together in his massive hand. He pulled her hands above her head and pushed them against the alleyway wall. She could feel the concrete scrape against her thumbs and the sides of her wrists. His other hand gripped her breast harshly as he pushed inside her harder. The forced stretch of her virgin cunt caused it to tear. His head was mashed uncomfortably against her cervix. She could feel every inch of him in her throbbing, abused sex. 

     She was dry as sand. He was only half hard. With a frustrated grunt he pulled out halfway and spit a fat glob on her cunt where they were connected. She sobbed in pain, fear, and humiliation. The slide was easier but he fucked in just as harshly. His thrusts were slow coming out before he slammed in, slamming their hips flush together and punching her cervix so hard it made her nauseous. He sped up, continuing to force her to feel every inch of him every time. She sobbed under him and gave a pained whimper with every thrust. All the while he snarled angrily at her every few thrust and muttered darkly. 

     You killed my partner.

     He groped at both of her breasts while he raped her before moving his hand back to choking her. His words from their first meeting flashed through her head. This world is wrong.

     Yes this world was wrong. He was just as wrong as the rest of the world. 

     She started to feel herself shake and she felt cold with the oncoming shock. Or maybe it was the oxygen loss and barely healing injuries. Maybe it was all three. 

     She felt like she was looking at his back. Watching her thighs spread helplessly around his aggressive bulk. At the same time she was aware of every inch of pain and every hateful word whispered in her ear. She could feel the slide of his penis forcing it way into her. The barest amounts of lubricants had developed to ease it, or maybe it was her blood. Either way, it felt like he was made of sandpaper. 

     He had become rock hard and was fucking her frantically. He wasn't looking at her. His face was in her hair, his mouth flush against her ear. She could feel his hot, damp breath moving up and down against her temple and hear the way his voice started to crack in pleasure around the venom he spewed at her. 

     She gagged behind her mask in pain and fear as his pace started to increase. She could feel him brutalize her cervix and walls and his hand on her throat and nothing else anymore. She wondered if he would strangle her to death in his anger. Everything burned. Her cervix hurt. Her thighs felt like he was about to pull one of her muscles or dislocate her hip. He let go of her throat and air rushed into her burning lungs, instantly forcing an orgasm from her trembling scared body.

     He glared down at her with his lip pulled back from his teeth. He punctuated his words with his harshest thrusts yet, pushing himself inside her cervix and causing her to wail hoarsely as tears rushed down her already soaked face under her mask in agony in terror as he said. "You. Filthy. Fucking. Slut." He moaned as his cockhead was forced into the tight ring of her cervix. She felt that tear too. "Ghoul whore."

     She could feel foreign warmth spread through her insides and continued to sob as she realized he finished inside her. He was still for a second as he growled and groaned through his orgasm. 

     When he pulled out he let her fall to the floor. He tucked himself back into his pants and wiped the sweat from his forehead as he did his pants back up, panting the whole time. He grabbed her wrist and dragged her. She whimpered. Falling in and out of consciousness before she finally succumbed to the black. 

-

     When she awake, she was in a different alleyway. Her skirt was still torn and bloody. Her panties here missing. She was throbbing between her legs and on her kakuhou still even though her foot felt healed. She picked herself up and started to sob anew as she took in her surroundings. She got to her feet and hugged herself as she made her way in the vague direction of Anteiku. She was missing a shoe. She didn't know how long she walked. It had only been around ten ish when the investigator attacked her - she sobbed and covered her mouth with her hand to stifle the noise as she smelled and felt a fat glob of blood mixed with the investigators semen drip out of her and down her thigh. It was pitch black out. Her only light was the spare back door lights that were left on, few and far between. At least that hid her partly.

     When she finally made it to Anteiku's back door she raised a trembling hand and smacked it against the metal weakly as she slumped to her knees. She continued to weakly hit the door until it opened, she didn't look up but she could smell the manager looking at her, collapsed at his feet. He gasped and pulled her slightly up and inside by her biceps. They had only seen each other hours before. She could smell his morning aftershave. 

     He just woke up. It's 5? Maybe 6am?

     "What happened?" He asked, tone soaked in worry. He inhaled and hissed. She knew the old man could smell her humiliation. Her fear. The investigator's cum that has started to leak from her. She sobbed again.

     "It was a human?" He asked.

     She took a shaky breath before she answered, "An investigator."
     Her voice was so small it was barely audible. She blacked out.

Chapter Text

     In the weeks after the investigators attack, Kaneki barely leaves the walls of Anteiku. And she never leaves alone anymore. 
     Two days after, when everyone's worried curiosity finally broke her, she gave Mr Yoshimura approval to tell everyone what had happened. He spent close to twenty long minutes asking her if she was absolutely sure. This type of aggression from a dove was abnormal. She cried after he left to call the meeting. 
     The first people to come and comfort her after the meeting were Touka and Irimi, Hinami following hot on their heels. She had become so stressed that her Kagune had manifested itself and wouldn't go away, leading to a pile up of the four girls. Kaneki had passed out in the mess of limbs and Kagune. Four days after that she went back to work in an effort to force normalcy back into her life. Hinami adopted a bird. Touka's school let out for the summer. Kaneki herself was taking a semester off. 
     Just when things were starting to look up, Ayato and Jason happened. 
     She could barely remember those ten days spent under Jason's cruelty. Didn't even register the passing of days between the torture, force feedings and rape. Losing herself completely and devouring Rize was the most powerful she had ever felt. Ripping Jason apart increased the euphoria of it tenfold. She had been buzzing while tapping into her knowledge of anatomy while she broke half of Ayato's bones. 
     She left Touka with Nishiki to scramble and meet at the determined rendezvous he had told her about. Her plan was to get there while killing as many of Aogiri as she could. At least that was her plan, until she saw the *investigator*. He had just cut down the Bean brothers. She kicked a stone to get his attention. It landed near his foot causing his eyes to shoot up and meet hers.
     Attempt successful. She jumped, landed in the small alley he was in front of, and ran away from him.
     He would follow.
-
     In the weeks after his second encounter with Eyepatch and before the planned Aogiri raid, Amon Koutarou retreated into himself. 
     Shame, heavy and deep and all encompassing had settled into his bones and ran through his veins the morning after. He remembered going out for drinks with colleagues. He remembered walking home drunk. He remembered being attacked by a random opportunistic ghoul, seeing Eyepatch...
     He remembered brutalizing her with startling clarity. He felt sick with himself. He didn't know his own thought process. He could find no reason why he had attacked her so savagely. He reckoned with the fact that he was not a good investigator. He was not a good person. A good investigator would have just dispatched her the same as the ghoul who had attacked him. A good person wouldn't have assaulted her based on his own personal feelings of obsession. 
     And he had been obsessed. This mysterious Eyepatch ghoul had consumed his every waking thought. Had started to invade his dreams. He wanted for so long to talk to her. To know why? Why had she spared him? Why did she kill his partner if she didn't want to be a murderer? 
     Instead he abused her in the most vile way possible. 
     He spent the next weeks training and working his goddamn cases. He barely talked to anyone. He declined Shinohara's invite to a dinner, knowing the man would ask questions he couldn't answer. 
     On the night of the raid he did what he was trained to do. His goddamn job. Once Juuzou cleared a path for them he began to cut through any fodder Aogiri threw his way. Sans Rabbit, who infuriatingly ran from the fight. He handled the Bin brothers, not easily. The entire fight he had felt the watchful eye of the grim reaper on the back of his neck. And, thankfully, he was able to walk away from the fight having granted the reaper an offering that wasn't him. 
     He was just about to contact the nearest unit and regroup when a stone almost crushed his toes. He looked up to see a female ghoul looking at him from a rooftop perch. When she noticed she'd successfully caught his attention she jumped and landed silently right in front of him. Eyepatch, his mind supplied helpfully. At least, he thought it was her. She looked skinnier, pale. Her hair had gone completely white. 
     She turned and bolted down the alleyway she stood in before he could say anything. 
     He called out from behind her as he gave chase. He felt cold fear nip at the back of his neck as they took more turns and he realized he would be completely and utterly unable to find his way back easily. 
     She stopped just as suddenly as she started. She stood, staring at the dead end in front of her silently. He opened his mouth to speak when suddenly he heard a crash, felt blinding pain across both sides of his ribs, and realized he had been thrown into the side of a dumpster. 
     He gasped, winded and tried to gather himself when small hands forcefully pulled him and threw him into the concrete wall on the other end of the alley they stood in. He caught a glimpse of the dumpster he had been thrown at and saw the side of it had been crumpled. When he breathed in he could feel his broken ribs shift. 
     He felt more than saw her climb on top of him. Her slender thighs on either side of his hips, she grabbed his neck and if to strangle him, then let go with one hand in order to bring it back and punch him. He felt and heard his cheek bone crunch under her knuckles. Then she got him above his eyebrow, causing an explosion of stars to accompany this crunch. 
     He was going to die here, at the hands of a ghoul he knew nothing about, who he wanted to know everything about. A reality where they were friends flashed through his mind, that was now surely squandered by his own selfish desires. 
     Her palm was still crushing his Adams apple. He didn't register her getting his pants down to the tops of his thighs. He only registered when suffocating wet heat engulfed his cock. She moved her hips in a forceful, jerky back and forth motion on his pubic bone with him inside her. She was still strangling him while she took her pleasure.
     Pain, sharp, aching, throbbing in several places throughout his body. He couldn't move his left arm. The combination of suffocation and broken ribs sent a hellish mixture of fire ice and pins and needles through his chest. His face felt swollen, his head was pounding. He struggled to open his swollen eyes to look at her. 
      Her head was thrown back in pleasure with her arm extended fully towards him. Her bright red Kagune was out, all four limbs pulsing with light. Small red lightning bursts sparked between them occasionally. Her white hair was bloody and mussed. Her exposed eye was closed, black veins visible around it. The mouth of her mask was unzipped, her own mouth was open and panting. She moved underneath the too large black shirt on her small, powerful frame. 
     When she noticed him looking, she pulled him up by his neck and sank her teeth into the almost fully healed bite wound she'd left on their first meeting in the rain. He could feel her sucking from the wound as she gyrated her hips. She pulled flesh out and went for another bite directly on the curve of his shoulder. She pulled out a good amount of muscle. She kissed him and shoved her bloody tongue in his mouth as she shuddered and came on top of him. The edges of his vision darkened as she squeezed his throat further, lost in the waves of her orgasm. 
     When it was over, he couldn't move. He wondered if this was how he'd left her in that alleyway. Of course it is.
     She didn't bother to tuck him back inside his pants before she started dragging him. He didn't know if it was blood loss, shock or exhaustion, but he passed out. 
-
     When he woke up, he was in the hospital. A broken cheekbone. Fractured skull. Broken collarbone and left arm. Five broken ribs. Extensive bruising around his neck and on his hips and torso. The obvious bite marks and the fact that he'd been sexually assaulted. The squad who found him had stricken that last fact from their reports. Everyone would know he'd almost been killed by a ghoul, almost no one knew that ghoul had used him for their pleasure. 
     His skin tingled at the memory. As always, he felt an obsessive need to see the Eyepatch ghoul again. He wondered if this was revenge, or reciprocation. Whatever this was, this dance they were doing was incredibly dangerous. They'd both been severely injured already. He would need to find a way to approach her again, diplomatically this time.
     The bouquet on his bedside table bothered him. No one could tell him who left it, beyond that it was a young woman with light brown hair. It was an odd bouquet, Bird's Foot Trefoil, Black Roses, White spider Lillies, and Rue rather than Baby's Breath. It was a specific bouquet, put together with purpose. He had a sneaking suspicion that it was Eyepatch who left the flowers, however he kept this to himself. He would sound like a madman. This was a CCG hospital, there were RC scanners at the entrance. He resigned to solve this puzzle when he was released.
     His squad mates frequently came to visit him. Akira came with mission reports, Shinohara and Juuzou came with sweets, Houji and Takizawa came with well wishes and nervous ramblings respectively. His days were insufferably boring. He spent most of his time doing paperwork, and when that ran out because he wasn't in the field, he requested books. He got one on flowers and their meanings under the guise that he was just that bored and wanted to learn. By the time he was released, four months had passed. 
     Spring was upon them, all the flowers in bloom made him reflect on the strange bouquet that was left for him. It was the only one like itself; and after what he'd learned, he was positive that it was Eyepatch who had left it.

Bird's Foot Trefoil - Revenge

Black Roses - Hatred, Mystery

Rue - Regret, Disdain

White Spider Lillies - New Beginnings, Good Health and Rebirth