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Chapter Text

Zuko stared longingly out the window to the palace courtyard. Katara was seated with his brother as they held one of his therapy sessions by the pond. He had a small amount of downtime between meetings that he had used to step into the hall. Every fiber of his being wished he could be out there by the pond with Katara and his brother. Instead, he would have to make use of his limited time. And because of that limited time he would have to make do with his role as an observer.

He thanked Agni every day that Katara had befriended his younger sibling. After the Agni Kai, he worried that neither of them would be able to stand being in the same room as the other. A part of him had wanted to offer Katara a position at the head of his efforts to assist his brother. He had spent days cooped up in his office agonizing over the idea. But he always came to the same conclusion. He worried that the moment Katara told his brother about their plan the boy would spiral until there was no hope of saving him. Zuko couldn't be happier to be proven wrong.

Once he finally decided to go through with his plan he then had to worry about how to broach the subject to his friend. Luckily Katara had come to him a few weeks after the war had officially ended. She had all but begged him to let her help his brother. She told him about the nightmares she had of the boy chained to the grate underneath the pagoda. Needless to say, he had agreed to give her the position on the spot.

A few months had passed since then, and his brother had responded to the therapy sessions better than he ever could have dreamed. Zuko was not privy to much of what was discussed during his sibling's sessions, however Katara and the Fire Nation doctors spoke highly of his improvements. The times when Zuko had to be pulled out of meetings or dragged out of his office to help calm his sibling down decreased drastically. Zuko knew that the therapy was working; he just wished that he could be more involved.

“Fire Lord Zuko the ministers have gathered in the meeting chambers and are awaiting your arrival.” (His personal servant) Poh’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts.

“Very well then, I will be on my way.”

Zuko spared one last glance out the window before he turned to complete his duty as Fire Lord.

For what felt like the first time since he and his friends had overthrown his father for the title of Fire Lord, Zuko had the day off. The night before his uncle had graciously offered to fill in for him for the day to give him a much-needed breather. Zuko’s first instinct was to search the palace for his boyfriend, or at least it had been until he remembered that Sokka was on a trip to Kyoshi Island to help Suki train the Kyoshi Warriors. Zuko let out a sigh as he wandered aimlessly down the palace halls.

A cool breeze drifted in from an unnoticed open door. Zuko decided that he would search for whoever left the door open and use it as an excuse to walk around the palace garden. The familiar stone path guided him as he enjoyed the serenity of his surroundings. The quiet times were something he came to savor amid the hustle and bustle of the palace.

Despite his best efforts, he never saw signs of anyone else outside with him. His legs instinctively carried him to his favorite spot in the garden. The small man-made hill had the perfect view of the turtle duck pond but that was far enough away to be easily overlooked. Zuko sat down on the grass and closed his eyes. Cool spring air rushed into his lungs as took a deep breath and focused on his inner flame.

An unknown amount of time passed as he sat in deep meditation. The sound of nearby laughter stirred Zuko back into the waking world. With the grace of a freshly awoken toddler, he slowly blinked his eyes open. It took him a few moments before they readjusted to the afternoon light. Zuko stood and stretched under the midday sun. He cringed at the way his knees cracked with the movement. He continued his walk from earlier albeit with a new goal in mind. It didn’t take him long to find the source of the laughter.

Katara and his brother were huddled up beside the pond. By the looks of things, Katara had gotten a little overeager with her waterbending as they were both drenched from head to toe. Neither noticed him as he made his way closer towards them.

“Come on Azu-” Katara’s eyes went wide as she sputtered and coughed. “Ahem, Zuko! What are you doing out here at this time of day?”

A smile found its way to his lips.

“Uncle took over my duties today so I wandered around a bit until I noticed someone had left the doors to the garden open. So I came to investigate, and I may have gotten a little distracted on the way.” He chuckled as he looked over towards his brother. “How are you today *Redacted*?”

He didn’t fail to notice the way his brother flinched.

“I’m fine.” His brother avoided his gaze as he spoke.

His brother fidgeted with the edge of his shirt. It was one of his tells that he was going to bolt. Not a moment after Zuko noticed the small action his brother was gone. Both he and Katara let out exasperated sighs. Under most other circumstances Zuko would have laughed at the coincidence.

“Am I doing something wrong?”

The question was rhetorical, a plea to the universe to show him how he could help his sibling. He struggled to fight back the tears that threatened to fall. Thankfully Katara seemed to sense his hurt as she made her way over to him and placed a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“I don’t think you are.” Katara looked up to the second-story windows of the palace as she pondered something. “They’re just having a bit of a hard time figuring out their place in the world and who they want to be.”

She gave him a soft smile before she turned to catch up with his brother inside the palace. Her choice of words confused him, but they also gave him a lot to mull over. At least he had plenty of time to do just that seeing as he had nothing better to do. Zuko stood and watched the turtle ducks as he pondered Katara's words in tandem with his brother's actions.

Zuko had slowly come to love and appreciate the palace library. When he was a young boy he had loathed the stuffy library. Back when he was told what to study and was given nigh impossible time limits to absorb ludicrous amounts of information. The threat of failure loomed over him in an exaggerated shape that reminded him of his father's shadow. It reminded him of the times when the stories his mother used to tell him before bed no longer gave him the same comfort that they once did before she left.

Now the palace library was full of opportunities, both to learn and to relax. It felt like an endless sea of bookshelves with books that were meticulously arranged from the floor to the ceiling. Tonight Zuko had the ever-exciting task of filtering through old Fire Nation customs. He had a meeting the next day on which ones to keep, which ones to abolish, and which ones to breathe new life into. With a heavy stack of books in each hand Zuko made his way towards the seating area. The books landed with a booming thud as he dropped them on the table.

His eyes wandered over the pile of books as he debated where to start. The sight of an already open book caught his attention. Zuko looked around in an attempt to identify who had left it there. He came up empty-handed. Zuko considered that the contents of the book might be able to provide some clues as to who had left it. He debated taking a small peek but ultimately decided against it.

He sat down and began to look through his books. At first, it was a small distraction. His eyes would glance up to look at the book across from him. It taunted him in his peripheral vision.

Any small noise would cause his head to jerk up in the hope it would be the book's owner as they made their return to the table. It became a routine. He would read a page and then he would take a moment to observe his surroundings. He read one page. And stole a glance. Then another page. And another glance at his surroundings.

This continued for what felt like a century. Eventually, Zuko's curiosity got the better of him. He grabbed the offending book mentally scolding himself for giving in. His eyes scanned the page eager to try and match the book to someone he knew.

'There have been many cases throughout Earth Kingdom history of a person or persons whose gender identification and or gender expression did not match the sex they were assigned at birth. Researchers at the Ba Sing Se Institute of Psychology have named this phenomena gender dysphoria. While it is currently unknown why individuals suffering from gender dysphoria experience such a disconnect from their assigned sex researchers have found some treatments that reduce the stress it may cause. The way a person is perceived and treated by others especially those with familial or romantic ties can have a substantial impact on their mental well being. As such researchers recommend any person or persons who may be suffering from gender dysphoria the following treatments: Changing pronouns i.e. using she/her or they/them instead of he/him (or vice versa), trying on clothes or styles that are commonly viewed as for the opposite gender such as skirts or pants, the growing out or cutting of one's hair, and more. *For a complete list of possible remedies turn to page 239.' 

Zuko swiftly returned the book to its original position on the table. The small passage he had read left him with more questions than answers. He wasn't aware that such a book existed in the palace library as it was something that Ozai and Azulon before him would have banned had they known it was in their collection. Zuko was vaguely aware that the library staff had put in an order for the most up-to-date textbooks and novels from the Earth Kingdom. He signed off on their use of palace funding after all. But the biggest question that raced around his mind was who pulled it off the shelf?

Any thoughts of Fire Nation customs were expelled from his mind. Zuko was so deep in contemplation he didn't hear the footsteps that approached.

"What are you doing here?" 

The voice was sharp and feminine. It reminded him of Mai though there was too much emotion behind the words to be her.

"Working." Zuko answered semi-honestly as he turned to face the welcomed distraction.

Nothing could have prepared him for what he saw. He had to fight to keep his jaw from hitting the floor as he turned and came face to face with his brother. Zuko had to do a double take to make sure his eyes were functioning properly. His brother's eyebrows which used to be thick and bushy were now sharp sleek lines. There was a hint of unnatural shadow around his eyes, unlike the dark circles that seemed to be a permanent part of his brother's face. His brother's lips shined a vibrant red as the candlelight danced over them. Zuko didn't realize that he was staring until his brother's eyebrows furrowed in annoyance.

"Whatever." His brother huffed.

Zuko watched as his brother retrieved the open book and walked away. Perhaps this was a sign. He would have gone straight to Katara but she was currently across the globe at her home. At least he had a trip to the Southern Water Tribe next week. He would have sent a letter but there would be no point, it would arrive with the ship he sailed in on anyway. Perhaps he would have to pay Katara a visit while he was there.

The ship that was supposed to ferry him to the Southern Water Tribe had been delayed. Captain Ruan assured him that the ship would be fully operational by the next morning. It wasn’t that big of a deal he didn’t need to be in the Southern Water Tribe for another week, but it did mean one more day that he would have to go without being able to hold his boyfriend in his arms. The ride back to the palace was rather uneventful and didn’t take long. It did give him time to think, and he had come up with what he thought was a pretty good idea.

He wanted to surprise his sibling and see if he wanted to spend the day with him. They could go for a walk through the market, and they might even be able to stop at the restaurant that served the extra spicy octopus-flounder that they enjoyed so much. Zuko had a spring in his step as he leapt out of the carriage. The servants were bewildered as they watched their Fire Lord skip through the halls.

He didn’t knock before he opened the door to his sibling’s room. Zuko was so excited that he didn’t take a moment to examine the room.

“Hey, the ship’s having some repairs done so I wanted to see if-”

He trailed off as his eyes finally landed on his sibling. They had a horrified expression on their face. His sibling shifted into a guarded stance as their arms moved to cover as much of their chest, stomach, and groin as they possibly could. A few awkward seconds passed that felt like an eternity without a word being uttered between the two of them. It was then that Zuko realized what he had walked in on. His sister? His sibling was dressed in a uniform that reminded him of the one Mai wore when she attended the Royal Fire Academy For Girls complete with a medium-length black skirt. Zuko decided that he needed to be the one to break the heavy silence that had settled in the room.

He put his hands in the air in an attempt at peace. “I won’t tell-”

“Get Out!” His sibling interrupted. Wild blue flames escaped their mouth as they screamed.

Zuko didn’t have to be told twice. He wanted to show his sibling that he would respect their wishes, even if he wanted nothing more than to have that awkward conversation. With the pace of a giant snail sloth, he slowly backed out of his sibling’s room. He made sure to close the door behind him. He sighed before he made the journey back to his room. The boat couldn't leave soon enough.

Sokka was the first thing Zuko spotted as the ship sailed into the Southern Water Tribe’s docks. He couldn't contain his excitement at the sight of the boy he hadn't seen in over a month. Zuko didn’t wait for the crew to pull down the ramp. With the grace of tiger elk, he leapt over the railing and tackled his boyfriend into a hug that sent them crashing down into the snow. Sokka's laughter wrapped around him like a blanket of warmth that contrasted the biting air around him.

"Buddy!"

"Ba- Hey that's no way to greet your boyfriend!" Sokka playfully hit Zuko's shoulder.

Zuko chuckled into the collar of Sokka's coat.

"I know it's rough but you are my buddy. How are you babe?"

Zuko pressed a chaste kiss on his boyfriend's lips.

"That's not- You can't just kiss away such an insult on my very being." Sokka's face was bright red and Zuko could swear he saw steam rise from the snow around the other boy.

"Oh I can't?"

Zuko kissed him again.

"Are."

He kissed him again.

"You."

And again

"Sure?"

Zuko gave him one last kiss on the nose as he stood up. Sokka remained a bright red puddle in his blue coat on the ground. People moved around the lovebirds as they began to unload the supplies Zuko had brought with him on the ship. Zuko's gaze remained fixated on his boyfriend he hadn't even noticed the light application of makeup on Sokka's face. The realization kicked his brain back into gear.

"I need to talk to your sister." Zuko's voice was serious.

"I knew you only loved me for my sister!" Sokka who had just stood up brought the back of his hand to his forehead and dramatically fell back into the snow.

"I'm serious it's about my sibling."

Sokka sobered immediately as he shot up from the snow, he knew how Zuko was about his sibling. Zuko didn't play around when it came to them.

"Right of course, follow me." 

It didn't take long for Zuko to be seated in Katara's igloo with a warm cup of hot chocolate in his hands. Katara stared at him inquisitively as he took a long sip from his drink. The air around them filled with a strange tension that threatened to snap at the first wrong move. Zuko looked around the igloo for something to get the conversation started. His eyes landed on a painting of a girl holding a flame.

"That's a pretty painting you have." 

Zuko cringed at his awkwardness.

"Thanks, Azu-" Katara coughed and took a sip of her drink. "My gir- A friend made it for me."

"Was it my sibling?" Zuko smiled at her.

Katara stammered. "Y-yes. Did she-"

Zuko held up his hand though he made a mental note of the pronouns Katara used, he wouldn't use them until his sibling asked him to.

"Not directly, but I've had a few encounters with them that clued me into the possibility."

Katara nodded. She hummed as she stared into her cup.

"And how does that make you feel?"

Zuko sighed a small smile spread on his lips as he set his cup down.

"I don't have a problem with it. I just want them to be happy." His smile fell as his voice became shaky. "But I'd be lying if I didn't say I wasn't a little scared. I'm not scared of them, but I'm scared for them. I'm terrified that the world will try and drag them down. That the people closest to them." Zuko's voice fully broke as the tears came crashing down his cheeks. "I'm scared that their family will hurt them. More than we already have."

Katara squeezed his right hand while Sokka rubbed circles on his back. "We can't predict how others will react but she'll know that you're in her corner. You always have been."

"Can you tell them, when we get back can you tell them that I want to get to know them. The real them."

Tears streamed down Katara's face as she nodded. She tried to speak but the only noise that escaped were sobs.

"I'm going to talk with uncle as soon as I get back. But I'll be waiting for the day their ready to tell me. When their ready to spread their wings."

The three sat and cried in Katara's igloo until no more tears would fall. Thankfully no one mentioned their puffy eyes when they went out to get food.

Zuko followed the scent of freshly brewed tea out onto the balcony. His uncle shifted in the chair he was reclined in. Zuko knew that his uncle did not like to be disturbed while he was on the balcony. The old man smiled softly as he noticed the presence that joined him was Zuko. Iroh swiftly grabbed the teapot and poured Zuko a cup. From the smell alone Zuko could tell that it was jasmine.

"Won't you join me for some tea my dear nephew. The look on your face tells me that you have something important to tell me." Iroh flashed him a great big grin. "Come and sit. Let the fresh air and tea ease your mind."

Zuko took a chair across from his uncle as he accepted the tea. A few moments of blissful silence passed as they both sipped at their tea. Golden rays of sunlight flooded into the landscape as the sun began to crest above the horizon.

"Uncle have you ever heard tales of someone being born in the wrong body?" His voice felt like an intruder against the soft sounds of nature.

Iroh hummed as he stared thoughtfully into his tea. To say Zuko was nervous would be the biggest understatement that would happen within his lifetime. How his uncle answered had the potential to irreparably sever their relationship. Regardless of how much he owed the man, Zuko would never put Iroh above his sibling. 

"I admit that like my little brother and my father, I too once held onto a rather closed-minded lens in which I viewed the world from. Like them I looked down upon people because they were different from me. I wondered why they couldn't just conform to the societal norms the Fire Nation preached. Like everyone else. However after Lu Ten's-" Iroh remained quiet for a moment as he silently let out his grief.

Zuko knew that Iroh had more to say and he didn't have anywhere better to be. He sat silently and waited for his uncle to continue.

"In my time away from the Fire Nation I met numerous different people from many different walks of life. I was also given the privilege to bare witness to the unfathomable diversity within people. I learned that the people my family talked about like monsters were in fact just people. People just like you and me. They cannot change the part of themselves that makes them different in the same way that I cannot change the fact that I am able to bend fire. In an ideal world who a person loves or how a person chooses to present themselves would make no difference in how they are treated. If the name someone is given or the clothes they are supposed to wear make them uncomfortable or unhappy. If that person finds a new name or a style of clothing that makes them comfortable makes them happy. Who am I, no how is the world to say that it is wrong of them? And if someone I knew told me the words I used to refer to them brought them pain. I would ask them how they wanted to be referred to as, and refer to them as such."

Iroh took a long sip of his tea.

"Now then would it be right to assume that you didn't come here simply to get an old man's thoughts on such a specific matter? Perhaps you have something you would like to tell me?"

Zuko felt his body relax. No longer burdened by the tension of possibly having to disown his uncle.

A chuckle escaped Zuko's throat. "No, the matter does not concern me. Agni I haven't even confirmed if they truly feel that way. But there is a chance that they do and I don't think it is my place to tell you if it is the case. If this person wants you to know I'm sure they will tell you."

His uncle's voice adopted a playful tone. "Well then, I hope I have shown this mysterious person that I can be trusted with such a deeply personal part of themselves."

Zuko smiled into his cup, now he just had to wait until his sibling was ready to spread their wings.

"How about a game of Pai sho with an old man?"

At least he could pass the time with a few games of Pai sho.

The door to Zuko's office slowly creaked open as Katara snuck inside. Zuko looked up from his ever-growing stack of paperwork. He couldn't mask the excitement he felt when he saw the wide smile on Katara's face.

"Are you busy?"

He was busy. Very busy in fact, but his work could wait. 

"No. I could really use a break."

"Would you, perhaps like to meet your-"

In his excitement, Zuko cut Katara off.

"Yes!" Zuko cleared his throat. "I mean, I would love to."

Katara snickered as she grabbed his hand and led him out of his office. Together they ran through the halls ignoring any strange looks the palace staff gave them. It didn't take long for them to arrive at his sibling's door. Zuko was nervous but he knew that the person inside was more nervous than he was. Katara patted his shoulder before she gave him a gentle push towards the door. He had learned from his previous mistake and made sure to knock and wait for permission before he entered.

"Come in!" His sibling's voice was muffled yet somehow even sharper than it had been a few weeks ago, and just as feminine.

Zuko spared Katara one last glance, and he appreciated the small smile his friend gave him. With a deep breath, he pushed the door open and walked inside. There was no trace of his sibling inside the room. He searched high and low until he noticed the shadow behind the bathroom door.

"You can just sit on the bed." The voice came from the bathroom.

The mattress sank under his weight. 

"Okay."

Silence filled the air, but Zuko was more than willing to give them all the time they needed.

"I'm sure that you've notice some changes in the way I've been dressing. Despite what I may say, you're not stupid Zuzu."

Zuko smiled. That was the first compliment his sibling had ever given him.

"I hate my name, I hate the clothes I have to wear, I hate the titles and pronouns people use for me. I hated when people compared me and my looks to father! It-" They choked back a sob. "It hurt. It's hurt me for as long as I can remember. But I thought that was normal. I thought everyone felt that way. I asked Ty Lee once if she felt the same way. But she just said 'Nope' and smiled at me like she hadn't just shattered my perception of the world and everyone else in it. But most importantly of myself."

Zuko's vision began to blur as he fought back tears.

"I scoffed at the idea of Katara quote 'Rehabilitating me.' I mean how could you rehabilitate something that had been born broken. But she taught me that I wasn't broken, I may have been physically and mentally abused but I wasn't broken. She gave me the chance to be myself gave me time to discover the girl I always had been."

A sister. Zuko had a sister. It felt strange to smile when he was still crying. It was an odd mixture of emotions he felt swirling inside.

"I am not a boy! I am not the prince of the Fire Nation! I am not *Redacted*! I am a girl! I am the Princess of the Fire Nation! I am Azula!"

The bathroom door opened slowly revealing Azula, his sister, to him for the first time. Zuko was too stunned to speak. Despite the tear-stained messy streaks of ruined eyeshadow on her cheeks, he thought that Azula looked stunning.

Azula shifted nervously. "Please don't hate me." Her voice was small.

His voice betrayed him as it refused to come out. He could tell that Azula took his silence as something far worse than it was.

"I'm sorry. I-I understand if you think I'm disgu-"

Zuko stood from the bed and made his way to his sister.

"I'm so proud of you." He finally managed to choke out.

A beat of silence passed.

"Can I hug you?"

"You may hug me this one time Zuzu."

A devious smile spread on his lips as Zuko pulled his sister in close. "I promise I won't tell anyone that you secretly love my hugs Lala."

Azula sputtered against his shoulder. "I- How dare you turn my own tricks against me."

They both began to laugh as they held onto each other. A comfortable silence blanketed itself around them. Zuko didn't know how long they remained in the embrace or if he should be the one to let go. In the end, he decided he didn't care. He just wanted to show his little sister how much he loved her.

"Also I'm dating Katara!" Azula blurted out awkwardly against his ear.

He couldn't silence the chuckle that escaped his throat. "I'm happy you've found someone that gives you the love and attention that you deserve."

Zuko pulled away from the hug. He hoped his eyes showed the sincerity of his words. He would have to thank Katara properly for helping his sister discover her true self. That was after he told her what the consequences would be if she broke his little sister's heart.

Zuko was all alone in the palace. Iroh had gone back to Ba Sing Se where he had reopened his tea shop. While Sokka had joined Katara and Azula's trip to the Southern Air Temple. It had been almost two weeks since the three had departed. When he asked what the purpose of the trip was Azula had answered with the hopeful if a bit vague phrase. 'To get something I've always dreamed of.' She never told him anything more. He had a sneaking suspicion that the Southern Air Temple was not the true end destination of his sister's journey.

Every day felt like it lasted a month as Zuko sat in the big empty palace. He had no friends or family by his side for the first time in over a year. Katara had promised him that they wouldn't be gone for long, but that didn't do much to ease the void of loneliness that slowly ate away at him. Meals were the times when the loneliness seemed to weigh him down the most. He pushed a slice of carrot around his plate as he stewed in his unrest. A small commotion erupted outside the dining hall but he couldn't muster the strength to care.

Zuko flinched as the large doors bursted open.

"Your majesty we have returned." Sokka's smug mocking tone felt like the most angelic music to his ears.

Zuko's grin was so large that it hurt his cheeks but he didn't care. A burst of adrenaline rushed through him as he bolted from his chair to hug his boyfriend. He was barely able to slow his momentum enough to prevent them from crashing down onto the floor. Zuko would have been content to simply stand in his boyfriend's arms for the rest of time. Unfortunately for him, Sokka began to pull away. Zuko pouted as his boyfriend stepped back.

Sokka let out a soft chuckle as he pulled Zuko's hand into his own. "It warms my heart that you're so excited to see me. But I think there's someone else you should see first."

Sokka took a step to his left and revealed the two girls behind him. Katara was in the doorway hand in hand with his sister. His sister who was almost unrecognizable from the girl who had left two weeks earlier. Zuko's jaw dropped. Azula looked so different and yet he knew that she was his sister. And he knew that her new look was perfect for her.

"How do I look?" Azula's voice which had grown in confidence over the past year, was meek and quiet.

Azula's arms and waist had shrunken a bit from what he remembered. But where they had shrunk his sister's chest and hips had grown slightly. Her face was sharper more refined, and her once stringy hair with an uneven hairline was now fuller and outlined her face entirely. But what stood out to him the most was the smile on his sister's lips. Zuko couldn't recall ever seeing her smile so genuinely or so brightly. He didn't care about the tears that leaked from his eyes. He wrapped his sister in a shaky hug.

"Lala you..." Zuko smiled despite how his voice threatened to break. "You look beautiful. I know I say this a lot and you're probably tired of hearing me say it but, I'm proud of you Lala."

They sat around the dinner table and chatted about their trip. Zuko was particularly interested when they described the spirit realm. Aang had apparently taken them to see the spirit of change. A giant two headed blue bird like creature who had been the one to grant Azula's wish. Occasionally he would catch himself as his eyes attempted to wander over to his sister. But he couldn't help it. He was so excited to see the unwavering joy that radiated off of her. Together the four of them felt like a true family.

The thought of family soured his mood slightly. He retreated into himself as he silently mourned the fact that his absent mother may never meet his sister. That his mother may never meet her daughter. Ever motherly Katara seemed to notice his melancholic mood.

"What's got you so moody?"

"Just thinking about family."

As much as he loved Katara she had the sometimes unwelcomed need to help those around her.

"Well, a little fireferret told me that Azula is ready to visit her uncle."

A small smile found its way to his lips. He may not get to show his mother her daughter, but he could show off his sister to his uncle. He would have to plan a trip to the Earth Kingdom for later that week.

2 YEARS LATER...

The venue was gorgeous. Zuko stared in awe at the magnificent structure of ice that his sister of all people had picked to be the location of her wedding. He shifted on his feet nervously as he waited for his sister to be brought to him. He knew that some of the guests found it strange that her brother would be the one to walk her down the aisle, but Zuko felt immense pride at being chosen for such an honor. Footsteps approached from behind him. He did his best to keep the tears back as he finally got a look at his sister. She was in the prettiest golden dress he had ever seen with red tassles that adorned the dress's waist and elbows. She had on her fiery red betrothal necklace that Katara had made for her.

"Please save your tears for your own wedding day Zuzu."

Zuko chuckled. "How did you manage to end up getting married before me?"

"Because while someone is taking their time agonizing over every small detail of your proposal I reached out for what I wanted and claimed it."

Zuko snorted. "And I seem to recall a certain someone's girlfriend proposing to her, while she languished over what metal to use for an engagement ring."

"You shouldn't lie to your sister on her wedding day Zuzu." Azula scoffed.

Music flooded out from the doorway. It was their signal to begin their walk down the aisle.

Zuko whispered in Azula's ear as they walked arm in arm. "I'm proud of you Lala."

"I'm so tired of-" Azula sighed. "Thank you."

After he had delivered his sister to her soon-to-be wife he made his way over to his boyfriend. He may or may not have cried after Azula's vows. If Sokka noticed he didn't say anything. He couldn't suppress the thoughts of his mother as they joined the two newlyweds for the customary celebration. He was close now. The clues he had amassed over the past two years all pointed to one place. A small village in the Fire Nation. Hira'a. The village where his mother was born. He wanted to bring his sister with him, but he knew that it would be best to tell their mother about her daughter before they reunited. Sokka must have noticed his mood as he grabbed two glasses of champagne.

"You looked like you could use a drink." Sokka handed him a glass. "Care to share your thoughts?"

"I'm just worried about the future. I'm worried that if we find mom she might not accept Azula. I don't know what I'd do." He realized that what he said could be taken poorly and quickly scrambled to fix his mistake. "I mean I'd stand by my sister's back even if it meant losing a mom but I can't help but worry about it."

Sokka gave him one of his big goofy grins that Zuko loved so much. "Well I think that you should push that aside for the night and celebrate with your sister. We can worry about the future when it gets here."

"Has anyone ever told you that despite how you act you're actually pretty smart." Zuko smiled.

"Hey what's that supposed to mean!"

Zuko giggled as he fled from his boyfriend. Sokka was right he could worry about the future later. Tonight he would celebrate his little sister and the progress she had made to get here.

Chapter Text

A knot of nervousness settled inside Zuko's stomach as the small village on the horizon steadily grew closer. He felt an immense gratitude towards his friends and fiancé for accompanying him. There was no way he could ever even imagine doing this alone. A pleasant shudder rolled through him as he felt Sokka rub soothing circles on his lower back. It wasn't long before Appa began to make his descent. He could see a few villagers point towards the sky as Appa breached through the clouds.

Gasps and whispered murmurs about the new Fire Lord could be heard from the crowd that was slowly beginning to form below them. The villagers looked upon them with unconcealed awe and reverence as Appa landed in the middle of Hira'a. Zuko felt a hand worm its way into his own. He clung onto Sokka's hand like it was the only thing that kept him from floating away. His eyes scanned the crowd from his vantage point atop Appa's saddle for any signs of his mother. When he came up empty handed he decided to employ a new strategy.

He cleared his throat before speaking. If he hadn't had their attention before he certainly had it now.

"I, Fire Lord Zuko, have come to the village of Hira'a in search of my mother Ursa." His voice boomed across the village center. "I have come to formally and personally overturn her banishment."

Zuko had hoped that his display would coax his mother out of hiding. A few tense moments passed in agonizing silence. He felt Sokka squeeze his hand, a silent gesture of his support. The crowd continued to speak in hushed tones to one another but remained still. Zuko was beginning to lose hope when he saw a hand shoot up from within the crowd.

"I'll take you to her." The crowd look to him in shock before he hastily continued. "Your majesty."

The crowd parted around the voice revealing a man in his early fifties with brown hair pulled back into a ponytail. A thin mustache and scruffy beard adorned his lips and cheeks. Zuko jumped down from Appa's saddle with Sokka to meet the man. Katara and Aang didn't trail too far behind. They followed the man quietly as he led them through the modest village. The scent of wet grass filled the air as they approached a small house on the outskirts of the village. The man didn't bother to knock on the door instead opting to stride inside like he owned the place. The group apprehensively followed him inside.

"Ursa we have a few guests you might want to come out and see!"

Zuko heard the sound of glass shattering and hurried footsteps.

"Noren!" A voice that pulled Zuko back to his childhood yelled. "You can't say that name!"

Noren as the man was called simply chuckled as Ursa rounded the corner. By the look in her eyes, it was clear that she was intent on chastising the man more. But when her eyes fell upon the large group that had invaded her home she came to a sudden stop. A small girl followed closely behind her and attempted to hide behind her legs. Zuko could tell from how his mother looked at him that she didn't recognize him. He couldn't blame her the last time they'd seen each other he had been significantly younger and hadn't yet received the burn mark from his father. Sokka gave his hand another squeeze.

"Mom?" Zuko managed to choke out.

His mother brought her hand up to cover her mouth but her eyes were wide. "Zuko?"

"How about we move this reunion to the kitchen. I'll make us some tea." Noren suggested.

Everyone began to make their way into the kitchen except for the mother and son who remained frozen in the small foyer. It wasn't until Sokka returned to his side that Zuko's brain restarted and gave him back control of his body. It seemed that Noren had a similar effect on his mom. Zuko heard Sokka's snort at the exchange.

The kitchen table didn't have enough seats for everyone which meant that Aang and Kiyi were relegated to sitting on the tatami mats. Noren graciously allowed Zuko, Katara, and Sokka to sit at the table with Ursa while he stood by the counter and brewed their tea.

He could tell by the look on his mother's face and how her eyes would dart to the left side of his face what was on her mind.

"Ozai did it." Zuko's voice broke the tense silence. "Supposedly I spoke out of turn during my first ever war meeting. As punishment I was challenged to an Agni Kai where he burned me for refusing to fight him. I awoke to the news that he banished me to find the Avatar as soon as I had recovered enough to move."

Ursa gasped and he noticed a few tears stream down her face.

"I would do it again though. My actions saved an entire division, and it lead me to travel with uncle. He helped me understand who was on the right side of history."

"I should have been there to protect you."

Zuko gave his mother a warm smile. "You protecting me is the reason why you couldn't be there. Had you not done that I wouldn't be here today."

A silence fell over the room as Noren delivered them all a cup of tea. Zuko took a sip of the tea noting that Iroh brewed much better tea and waited until his mother was ready. He had his uncle and Azula to thank for teaching him such patience.

"Are you still with Mai?"

Zuko chuckled. "Oh no. She's dating Ty Lee now."

He cringed slightly as he realized he outed his friends. (Even if they made no effort to hide their relationship from the world.)

Ursa smiled. "I guess it's true when they say opposites attract I don't think they could be more different if they tried. Good for them though." She looked up to meet Zuko's eyes. "So then are you seeing anyone?"

Zuko felt his right cheek heat up and he could spy Sokka's blush beside him.

"Oh! I assume this handsome man is?"

"Sokka, my fiancé." Zuko felt like he could melt as he gestured towards the young adult.

"It's a pleasure to meet you ma'am" Sokka stood and gave her a traditional Fire Nation bow.

"Please there's no need to be so formal" Ursa waved her hand.

He found it a little strange how he was so focused on ensuring that his sister would be accepted, that he hadn't spared a thought about how his mother would react to his choice of partner. 

They chatted for a while about how Zuko felt about being Fire Lord and his journey. The sun which had been high in the sky had begun to set before his mother brought up his sister.

"And how is he? I noticed he didn't join you on this trip." Ursa didn't say her dead name but it was easy enough to guess who she was talking about.

Zuko sighed. He knew they would have to cover this but that did nothing to alleviate the pit in his stomach. The jovial mood that had built up around them crumbled in an instant. His mother looked at him worried about his darkened expression.

"There's a lot to tell you about *Redacted*."

Katara's face scrunched up at the name. He hadn't said that name in over two years. Agni just saying the name felt like a betrayal but he needed his mom to know just who he was talking about. He felt like he needed to wash his mouth out with soap to erase the taint that name left behind on his tongue.

"Is he?"

"No, no. Nothing like that."

Zuko was conflicted. He hadn't wanted Azula to come in case his mother said or did anything to her. But at the same time, it felt bad to out his sister without her present even if he had her express permission to do so. He also wasn't sure he was ready to let go of the relationship he had spent all afternoon rebuilding with his mother. He hated what he was about to do. How he was about to misgender his sister, but he had to make sure that his mother got the whole story. And he couldn't think of another way to ensure that he was able to get that across.

"Um, well."

He struggled to get the words out, but Sokka's fingers danced atop his palm and gave him the strength to keep going.

"They were in a really bad place. Especially after our Agni Kai."

Ursa gasped, but he continued on undeterred.

"Our fath- Ozai really fu..." He looked over to the seven-year-old in the room and quickly rephrased his words. "Ozai really messed with their head. They were taunted by hallucinations of you and father berating them. Screaming at them. I'm not privy to much of what they went through. But thanks to Katara over there, they got better. Progress was slow at first. Their sessions always ended with a wide variety of stuffed animals going up in flames. But as time went on they slowly began to get better. And in the process of getting the help they needed, they learned something about themselves along the way."

Ursa looked at him confusion written all over her face. Zuko's throat felt dry but he knew that was from holding back the tears that threatened to fall. He took a few sips of tea before he continued.

"There's a reason why they didn't join us. I was a little worried about how you would react."

Zuko could see the hurt on his mother's face.

"Mom, you don't have two sons and a daughter." Zuko could feel the tears that now fell freely down his right cheek. "You have two daughters and a son."

Ursa lifted a hand to cover her mouth as tears streamed down her face. The silence scared Zuko, and he now felt like he understood a little of how Azula had felt when she had come out to him. Sokka's hand held his own but he could still feel the sweat that coated it. The silence was deafening.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity his mother spoke. "What's her name?"

In an instant, Zuko felt relief wash over him as he let out the breath he'd been holding.

"Azula."

"It's a pretty name."

The tension in the room snapped because Zuko couldn't stop the snort that escaped him.

"What?" Ursa stared at him with concerned eyes.

He chuckled. "It's just if she were here she'd say." 

Zuko struggled to breathe. His voice came out in gasps between his laughter. "Wait wait Katara do her voice."

Katara sat up straighter in her chair and puffed out her chest a little. "Thank you ma'am, I picked it out myself." 

It always amazed him how well his sister's wife could imitate her. Katara's impression elicited laughs from everyone in the room even those that didn't know how scarily accurate it was.

"And what did you say your name was dear."

"Katara, I'm Azula's wife and Sokka's my brother." Katara bowed in the same way Sokka had hours before.

Ursa smiled. "I see that good looks must run in your family then."

Zuko noticed how Katara blushed at the compliment. As his gaze slowly drifted back to his mother he noticed the serious expression on her face. Even after all these years, he'd never forgotten the look she used when she wouldn't accept no as an answer.

"So when can I meet her?"

The trip back to the palace was thankfully uneventful. His mother and her family had been cautious atop Appa their apprehension filled the air around them. Still, they made it back to Caldera in one piece. The plan had been to fly straight to the palace, however, Zuko had asked Aang to drop his reunited family off in the market so that they could warn Azula of their mother's return in advance. Ursa had tried to protest but he wouldn't budge. He knew that his mother was probably dying to see her daughter. But she had waited a little over fourteen years, she could wait another twenty minutes. Azula ran up to Appa before the sky bison had even landed.

"Zuko it's horrible! I couldn't stop him!"

Under normal circumstances, Zuko would have been terrified, but this was his sister. The sister that had spent way too much time around Sokka. It still baffled him how his once stoic sister had adopted his fiance's faux dramatics.

"Uncle he. He's gone mad! He signed into law that everyday at precisely two o'clock the Fire Lord must take a break for pai sho and. And tea!" Azula shuddered and pretended to faint knowing that her wife would catch her. 

Zuko had to clench his teeth to stop any laughter from escaping. He watched as Azula slowly opened one eye to survey the group. She clicked her tongue and righted herself when she realized everyone had managed to hold in their laughter.

"You're all no fun." She pouted.

He had so valiantly held in his laughter up until he heard her pout. There was no doubt in his mind that had he been drinking something it would have come rushing out of his nose.

Azula threw her hands in the air. "What are you laughing at that could possibly be funnier than my joke!"

Zuko wheezed and almost died when he heard her mutter 'Weenie head.' under her breath. Katara cleared her throat and shook her head at the siblings' antics. She sent Zuko a look that meant 'tell her.' and within a few seconds, he had sobered up completely. Azula seemed to notice the sudden change in atmosphere.

"We found her."

"You found her." They spoke in unison.

"Is she?"

Zuko shook his head. "She's at the market we didn't want to drop them off on you unannounced."

"We wouldn't even think of doing that to you baby." Katara kissed Azula's forehead.

Azula fidgeted with the hem of her shirt. "Them?" 

"Her new husband and daughter." Zuko clarified.

"Of course she went and found a new family."

As Azula scoffed small blue flames escaped her lips. Her free hand balled into a fist while Katara rubbed small circles over the back of her other hand. His sister's eyes glistened with tears and she looked poised to take off.

"She really wants to meet you." Zuko added.

Azula's head snapped to his as she judged his honesty. She looked over to her wife who nodded in confirmation. There were no more flames when she huffed.

"Maybe later. I need time."

Zuko nodded in understanding.

"And I don't want her to bring anyone else when we do meet. I'm sure I'll see them in the halls but still."

"Of course."

His sister stared off towards the city lost in her thoughts. He couldn't help but worry anytime Azula got lost in her head. A bell chimed in the distance and seemingly snapped her back to reality.

"If you'll excuse me I have a meeting with the acting Fire Lord. It is two o'clock after all."

Zuko snorted at his sister's excuse. He would have to be the one to explain to his mother why she couldn't see the daughter she so desperately wanted to meet. But he wouldn't go back on his word to his sister. Never.

The palace had never been livelier. Three weeks had passed since his mother had returned with his new stepfather and half-sister. His mother had been upset that she couldn't meet with her daughter, but she also understood that it wasn't her place to force Azula to meet with her. Zuko noticed that his sister didn't wear her crown out in the halls and had even seen his mother pass Azula multiple times without realizing who she had passed. But he also saw how Azula sped up her pace or ducked into a closet when she noticed her mother.

It made Zuko's heart ache. He yearned for nothing more than to be one big happy family again. But he knew that Azula had to be the one to initiate such a change. Zuko absentmindedly wandered into the library lost in his thoughts. He perused the bookshelves. His thoughts drifted to his youngest sister as he made his way over to the children's section. The idea of having such a young sibling stirred a hidden desire deep within him to make sure that her childhood was nothing like that of her brother or sister's. In the time that Kiyi had been at the palace, he had taken every measure to ensure that he left blocks open in his schedule to spend time with her. He especially enjoyed reading her bedtime stories, it always brought him back to the simpler times in his childhood.

"But the brave girl did not falter."

Zuko stopped in his tracks. His mind raced as he attempted to reason why Azula would be reading aloud.

"What does falter mean?" 

He almost fell over into a bookshelf when he heard his youngest sister's voice. Zuko raced around the bookshelf until he came to the small children's reading area. His jaw dropped at what he saw. Azula sat reclined in one of the new bean bag chairs with little Kiyi on her lap and a book in her hands.

"It means to hesitate or pause."

Kiyi nodded excitedly in Azula's lap. As Zuko leaned forward he came to the unfortunate realization that he had grasped onto the top of a book rather than the shelf. The book thudded to the ground as he tripped forward. Azula's head quickly turned and locked onto him. His hand instinctively reached to rub the back of his neck. 

"Zuzu how nice of you to join us." Azula smirked.

Zuko loved his little sister with every fiber of his being. But that didn't stop every fiber of his being from wanting to strangle her for telling his youngest sister the nickname that he admittedly had come to enjoy. 

"Zuzu!" Kiyi repeated with a giggle.

"What are you two doing?" Zuko asked as he sauntered closer and fell into his own beanbag.

"Zula's reading a story!"

It was Zuko's turn to smirk. He could see Azula's eyes go wide and saw her mouth a silent 'No.' but he was out for revenge. Two could play the embarrassing nickname game.

"Lala's always enjoyed reading. Haven't you Lala?" He emphasized her nickname.

"Lala!"

Azula groaned as Kiyi giggled even harder. The older girl sent him a sharp glare, but it melted into a soft smile when she glanced down at the girl in her arms. Once Kiyi's giggles stopped Azula went back to reading, and Zuko remained perfectly content to spend time with his sisters.

The few beams of sunlight that had shone brightly into the room began to disappear as the evening began to give way to nightfall. He watched as Kiyi slowly drifted to sleep in her sister's arms. Azula must have noticed too as she began to run her fingers through her sister's hair. Zuko couldn't have wiped the smile from his face if he tried.

"She likes you."

Azula hummed.

"I'll be honest I was a little surprised when I saw you two together." He paused. "I wasn't sure how you'd feel about her. Is it safe to assume that you like her too?"

"There are certainly worse people to be around, I suppose."

Despite what she said Zuko could see the sparkle of adoration in his sister's eyes. They sat for a while longer chatting about nothing important. Zuko knew that they should return their younger sister to their mother before she tore down the palace in her search for her daughter. Reluctantly Azula handed the sleeping Kiyi to Zuko and kissed the sleeping girl on the forehead.

"Goodnight Kiyi."

"G'night Zula." Kiyi mumbled sleepily.

Zuko smiled at his sister before he left to drop off Kiyi. The walk back was uneventful but the jostling did cause Kiyi to wake up in his arms. He could hear shuffled footsteps and a muffled voice from behind his mother's door. Zuko awkwardly knocked on the door as his now one-handed hold on Kiyi tightened.

"Who is it?" Ursa's exasperated voice called.

"Zuko."

"And Kiyi!"

He smiled at his youngest sister.

"And Kiyi." He added.

The door opened in an instant and his mother's worried face instantly flashed with relief as she laid eyes on her daughter.

"Kiyi where have you been? We've been worried sick." Their mom gently chastised the girl.

"Zula was reading to me in the li-li.." She stuttered albeit adorably. "Liberry and then Zuzu joined us, and then I fell asleep. But then I woke up on the way here."

Their mother looked taken aback by the fact that her oldest daughter had willingly interacted with her siblings. She looked to Zuko like she wanted him to confirm what her daughter had said.

Zuko simply nodded. "We read quite a few books with Lala didn't we?"

"Lala." Kiyi giggled through a yawn.

"Alright missy let's get you to bed." Ursa looked up to him. "Thank you for bringing her to us. Will we see you at breakfast?"

Zuko nodded.

"Good night Zuko. Tell Zuko goodnight Kiyi."

"Night Zuzu."

"Goodnight Kiyi, Goodnight mom."

Zuko was in the middle of having a swift lunch out in the gardens. It was a perfect day and he didn't want to waste all of it stuck inside. The wind's gentle breeze offset the sun's harsh heat. The turtle ducks quacked happily as they enjoyed the bread that Zuko had brought along with him. He was perfectly content to remain there until he was dragged back to his office. It was inevitable that someone would be sent to retrieve him, but when he heard the footsteps approaching he couldn't help but think that it was too soon. He turned to greet the person who was sent to intrude on his peace. He was shocked to see his sister beside him as she stared off into the distance with a conflicted look on her face.

"I'm ready."

Zuko looked towards his sister dumbfounded, unable to understand what she was speaking about. He stared at her with the hope that she might elaborate. Time passed at an agonizingly slow pace as a deafening silence stretched out between them. Then like his father's open palm, the answer struck him.

"Are you sure?"

Azula turned to him and nodded.

"When do you want-"

Before he could speak his mind Azula cut him off. Over the years he had come to realize that this particular bad habit that Azula possessed wasn't her trying to be rude. Whenever she felt a lack of control it often manifested itself in her need to control any conversations she was a part of.

"Tonight. I know you're busy this afternoon, so I was thinking we could do it after dinner. If you don't have any other plans."

A small smile spread across his lips as he spoke.

"I'll let her know."

Azula sighed as her fingers played with the hem of her shirt.

"Thank you." Her voice was so quiet that the happy quacks of the turtle ducks almost drowned it out.

Zuko hummed his acknowledgment. He wanted to say more but he struggled to find any words. A groan escaped his throat as he heard the approaching footsteps.

"My Lord, the Earth Kingdom ambassadors have arrived." His personal attendant bowed as he spoke.

Zuko pushed himself off the towel he had been sitting on. "Of course, I'll be right there."

He walked over to pat his sister's shoulder. "I'm so prou-"

With a quick smack, Azula knocked his hand away.

"I thought I told you to stop saying that."

Zuko couldn't suppress his chuckle. "Mmmh, I've elected to ignore that though."

Azula's faux frown shifted into a cruel mockery of a smile. After eight years it was easy to forget everything that his sister had done during the war.

"How about you ignore this!"

Azula laughed as she launched fireball after fireball at him, but it sounded playful. A far cry from the sadistic agony-fueled laughter she had let out during her "Coronation". Zuko didn't have to worry about dodging any fireballs as they either missed wildly or dissipated in the air before they reached him. He found himself laughing alongside her as Azula chased him all the way to the meeting room.

A suffocating tension filled the dining hall as Zuko and his mother waited for Azula. His mother had asked a few questions about her daughter that he did his best to answer. Now the only sound that could be heard was the nervous tapping of his foot. The designated meeting time had come and passed, but Zuko had already assumed that might be the case. He could tell by his mother's slowly falling expression that she did not have high hopes that her daughter would come. Right as he was about to ask her to wait just a few more minutes the doors to the dining hall were slowly pushed open and someone quickly snuck inside.

"Katara?" Zuko spluttered with confusion. It took him a few moments to recover. "Where's Azula?"

Katara smiled. "Currently pacing behind the door like a big dork. She sent me in here to do 'Reconnaissance.', she wouldn't admit it but she's a little nervous."

Zuko watched as Katara scanned the room, and then nodded to herself. She opened the door just enough to stick her head through. Although he couldn't hear anything he imagined Katara was relaying her observations to Azula. His mother glanced at him nervously but he just held up a hand and mouthed that it was okay. A few nervous moments passed before Katara returned her attention back towards the table. It was then that Zuko noticed the hand that was in Katara's own. From the look on his mother's face, she had noticed the hand as well. The door slowly creaked open to reveal a rather dressed-up Azula. Zuko could see her free hand already fidgeting with the hem of her shirt.

Beside him his mother let out a gasp as she covered her mouth, her eyes glistened with fresh tears. 

"Hey, mom." Azula's gaze briefly flicked up to Ursa as she gave a small wave.

"Look at you my beautiful baby girl, you're all grown up!" 

Zuko could tell that his mother was happy, but her voice was laced with sadness as the reality of how much of her daughter's life she had missed set in. His gaze moved to his sister. She had matured in the past few years, far from the angry teenager she once was. Still, he couldn't stop the seed of worry that had sprouted in the back of his mind. He worried that she would have a biting retort for her mother's words. He didn't miss the movement of Katara's fingers on the back of Azula's hand.

"Of course I am." Her words were harsh but there was no venom in Azula's voice. Instead, it was unusually quiet and somber. "It has been fourteen years, after all."

Ursa let out a choked sob. Zuko shifted on his feet. The uncomfortable atmosphere had increased tenfold it felt like the gravity in the room had increased drastically.

"Why? Why did you leave us with him? How could you leave us alone with that monster?" Plumes of smoke began to trail out of Azula's nose as she shouted.

The image of a dragon swiftly appeared in Zuko's mind, but it was gone as fast as it had come.

"Zula, breathe with me." Katara began as her free hand rubbed Azula's arm. "In."

Zuko counted six seconds.

"And out. In."

This time he counted five.

"And out."

They continued off in their own little world. Zuko watched with awe as Azula visibly calmed. He had seen Katara help his sister with this method more times than he could remember. Yet that did little to prevent his shock at how easily she had been able to calm Azula down. Despite the rocky start, Ursa had a ghost of a smile on her lips. A sharp juxtaposition to her surroundings as she watched Katara help her daughter.

Azula looked down at the table. She avoided looking at her family as she mumbled out a soft "Sorry." for raising her voice. But Ursa shook her head.

"If anyone should be apologizing it's me." A beat passed in silence. "I'm sorry for abandoning you."

Ursa's noble facade cracked as sobs began to wrack her body.

"I thought I was doing what was best for you and your brother. By the time I had made it out of Caldera I realized I had made a loathsome mistake by leaving you two, but it was too late to go back. Your father already had guards patrolling the streets, despite being an accomplice himself."

Azula blinked rapidly, her mouth stuck hanging open. It was clear that whatever she expected her mother to say, it wasn't that.

Ursa continued. "Not a day went by that I didn't think of you and your brother. In the beginning I found myself wandering the Fire Nation with no purpose, like a leaf drifting in the wind." She coughed and cleared her throat. "Eventually I found my way back to the village of Hira'a, where I was born. I had been in the village all of ten minutes when Ikem, the man I was in love with before your grandfather forced me to be his son's bride, approached me. He invited me to stay in his home for a few days and he was just how I remembered him. One thing led to another and I found myself staying there permanently."

Zuko could tell that the gears of Azula's mind were turning by the hardened look that fell upon her face. His eyes shifted to Katara, but she remained quiet silently expressing her support with her hand wrapped around Azula's own.

"When the war ended, why didn't you come back?" Azula's voice was hoarse.

A sigh escaped his mother's lips. "Three months had passed since Zuko's coronation before news of the war's end made it to our small village. Ikem and I discussed returning to the palace everyday, but I was worried that my return would not be welcomed. I was also worried that you two may believe I was attempting to replace you with Kiyi. Together we came to the conclusion that it would be best for you two to be the ones to seek me out, out of your own volition."

It was hard to know what thoughts were going through Azula's head, but she nodded along to her mother's words nonetheless.

After what felt like a small eternity Azula looked down towards the floor as she spoke. "I understand why you made the decisions that you did, but that doesn't take away the hurt I felt that a part of me still feels because of them." His sister began to sob. Her voice broke in the same way it had when she came out to him. "Those first three years without you were a living hell, and it only got worse after Zuko was banished. Wearing long sleeves, and pants became staples of my fashion because of how often he would beat me. I had to be perfect. Anything less was met with either flames or fists."

Katara squeezed Azula into a hug and rubbed her shoulder as she continued.

"When he learned of the Avatar's reappearance and Zuko's failure to capture said Avatar, he tasked me with capturing the Avatar alongside uncle and my own brother. At the time it seemed logical to me that I was best suited for the job, but in retrospect I was still a child barely fourteen at the time. A child who had been sent out to fight in a war, tasked with taking over impenetrable cities and bringing back my brother so he could face punishment for his 'failure'. But how was I supposed to know what I was doing was wrong? I didn't have a mentor like Iroh traveling beside me to guide me onto a better path."

Azula's body shook as she looked up towards her mother.

"The first crack formed shortly after I had, regrettably, killed the Avatar."

Ursa let out a small gasp and Zuko could hear a few sniffles coming from her as she digested Azula's words. But Azula looked towards her wife with the smile that she reserved just for her.

"Thankfully Tara is the best healer in all the nations and she was able to save him from the fatal lightning strike I had given him. I could come up with an infinite number of excuses for my actions, but the truth is I just wanted my brother back to help take some of the burden that had been placed on my shoulders. But Zuko has always been too good hearted and eventually he ventured off on his own to join the Avatar. Leaving me alone with Ozai's expectations once again. The final straw was when Mai and Ty Lee betrayed me. I don't blame them for finally ditching me, I had been quite manipulative and abusive towards them but their betrayal only worsened the cracks that had been slowly forming. It all came to a head on the day of Sozin's comet. The constant pressure, the betrayals, the expectations they all became too much and I broke. I broke in ways that I didn't know a person was capable of breaking in." 

Zuko couldn't suppress the shudder that rolled through him. He quickly glanced to meet Katara's eyes as she mirrored his actions. They shared a look of understanding and there was no doubt in his mind that she too was remembering that fateful day. A picture of his sibling writhing around in sheer agony still haunted him. And he knew it was the same for Katara.

"But for the first time in my life I could say I was truly lucky. Lucky to have people who cared about me there to pick me up when I fell. That encouraged me to explore myself and my place in the world. Progress was infuriatingly slow at first, yet slowly but surely my mental health began to improve. Despite the progress I made it felt like there was this invisible soul crushing weight that I dragged behind me everywhere I went. That I had been dragging behind me for as long as I could remember. I suppose I had become so accustomed to its presence that I never recognized it for what it was."

Azula took a deep breath that Zuko suspected was an attempt to steady herself.

"The words everyone used to refer to me, my name, and the constant comparisons to him. They unknowingly chipped away at me until I was left bitter, angry, and resentful. But during my therapy sessions I was given the courage to explore myself and my identity. And once I began to it became excruciatingly obvious, and a constant source of stress. While things had been getting better this new realization, the doubts, the disgust with my body, it was overwhelming. The only time I've felt something similar was during the solar eclipse or when Ty Lee chi..."

A grimace crept onto Azula's face.

"Look what I'm trying to say is it felt like the times when I was disconnected from my chi. I knew I couldn't keep living how he wanted. I had to be myself. It took a few months of stumbling around trying different styles to find my true self. My life had never been better I had friends and family by my side, and finally felt like myself. I couldn't fathom a way for it to get any better. But the Avatar had other plans. Somehow despite the fact that I killed him with my own two hands he still believed in me, and wanted to see me become the best version of myself. Aang graciously led Katara and I through the spirit world until we found the spirit of change."

Azula continued to recount her exploits during the time that Ursa was away. Given the fact that Zuko had been there for many of the stories, or at the very least had already been informed about them, it was of little surprise when his attention began to drift away from his sister and onto their mother. He could tell that she was attempting to conceal the gravity of her emotions, though it was evident that she hadn't had to partake in the practice very often in her time away from the palace. It wasn't difficult to notice the way her lips would part and her breath would still whenever Azula recalled close calls or times when her depression had become an ocean that she couldn't seem to escape. The times when she had almost drowned in it.

A chill encased him as he remembered the struggles his sister faced. Both before and after she had come out to him. Yet in spite of the knowledge that both he and his sister would continue to face challenges. Zuko knew that they would also continue to grow and change as people. The tension in the room had settled into that of understanding. Only time would tell whether or not Azula and Ursa could repair their relationship, but this was a start. As the night continued to pass Ursa excused herself, not without asking if Azula would like to join her for tea sometime later in the week. A comfortable silence fell upon the room as the three remaining occupants allowed the weight of the conversation to sink in.

Zuko met Azula's eyes and spoke before he could stop himself. "I'm proud of you Lala."