Archive of Our Own ^beta

I nervously tapped my fingers on the cold table, feeling its chill seep through my skin. Where the hell was my head when I didn't bring gloves? That thought incessantly spun in my mind.

Why, after all, did I agree to come here? 

I should have stuck to my firm decision to say " no ". It's been two long years, and I owe her nothing... I don't even know this woman. Who the hell knows what she might want with me? Last time, she jumped through my window looking all dangerous, telling me not to get in her way... And despite her silly insistence for me to come today... she might very well be here to kill me.

She's the one who got in my way…

And let's talk about how vulnerable and exposed I feel with this stupid haircut, which reveals more than it hides. "A sleek, well-cut bob will be perfect for you, it's practical, it's stylish...!" They said... Bullshit... it's horrible... it's attention-grabbing...

It's as if every person has their eyes on me since I cut it. While the attention from girls wasn't bad... having idiotic men buzzing around me like flies wasn't pleasant.

The reflection in the mirror across the table returned an image that wasn't bad. I reluctantly admit, but I did. The haircut actually seemed suitable for a pretty, stubborn girl, with a long neck like me. I console myself with the discomfort knowing that the style matches perfectly with all my suits, whether for business meetings or battles, I can't complain about that. I messed up the strands again thinking about how long this cut could last...

The feeling of being unprotected made me question my decision to cut my hair like this every day. I know I seem annoying and nitpicking... but... God... I miss the long strands that hid me from the world on some occasions. It would be less bad if my neck wasn't completely exposed to the cold, freezing, and I didn't bring a damn scarf.

I looked at the remnants of snow outside, chastising myself for even leaving the house this morning and even more for walking from Bishop Security to here, facing the cold wind and snow.

Okay... maybe I should stop complaining... it's just a bad day... it will end at some point... and I'll be able to return to the safety of my new and secure apartment... It's just about that.

No... wrong... I still have a strange meeting to deal with...

Damn it...

Turning Christmas seclusion into my biggest tradition became my choice since that mess two Christmases ago. Now it was all about being alone... eating well... receiving warm hugs from my dog... sleeping deeply... crying about how messed up things still are with my mother who refuses to talk to me... and doing whatever the hell I wanted.

Anyway... It was my time for peace and reflection. It didn't make sense to me to risk experiencing something similar again at this time. It's truly insane to put myself in a suspicious situation with a dangerous woman like her, especially now.

I should warn Clint about this situation. He's been on her trail all this time, always frustrated by false leads and detours. I quickly understood that she didn't want to be found, but Clint never gave up, persisting with an enviable determination that she needed him. That they're connected by Natasha and blah blah blah...

I guess she really isn't interested in reliving any of that because that's what I would do.

I rubbed the sleeves of my handsome, well-cut suit and tie for the thousandth time, feeling even more foolish for not being able to call Clint. In many ways, but this is a problem I don't want to bring to him. I don't think he needs the stress of reliving Natasha's loss.

Planting my two feet firmly on the ground to steady myself, I felt like even my favorite boots seemed to want to annoy me. It's as if I felt that each of the calluses and discomforts were irritating people preventing me from walking home right now.

Today is completely wrong.

I should leave, abandon this meeting before it even starts.

Leaning back almost hidden at the table with my eyes closed, it was as if I could hide from the fucking world... 

I should hide from her...

No... I don't need to hide…

I would deal with her no matter what the real reason for her appearance is.

I spent many minutes trying to focus on what the hell I should say when she arrived.

Why would she call me after two years of absolute silence?

She must be on a mission... she must know about my job now...

Maybe she needs information... maybe she wants help... or maybe she's working for the wrong people again...

Certainly, she might have come to kill me…

My distraction with all my discomfort was interrupted the moment a warm and gentle hand wrapped around my neck. The scare of the unexpected touch made me almost jump holding the sword at my waist and lose my words.

My eyes snapped back to the mirror, and there she was.

The first thing that made my jaw drop was her perfectly short hair, similar to mine but different because it was impeccably arranged.

Beautiful .

This cut definitely suits her... much better than me.

I noticed still in shock that there was also a very nice neck to show off, adorned with many jewels. The elegant clothes, the same piercing and fun eyes, the same cynical smile... She's still beautiful, maybe even more than before.

My inventory lasted only a few seconds. After that, she was already giving me a "Hiii!" in the same way she once did, scaring the life out of me with her invasion of my apartment.

I swallowed hard when her soft hand left my skin, replaced by a soft, fragrant scarf, and I almost whimpered at the loss of contact as I watched her circle around the table to sit in the chair opposite me.

"So... the cat still got more pieces of your tongue when you see me..." she said, crossing her legs, looking much more comfortable than I really felt. But I strengthened myself, remembering who I am now. I'm no longer the frightened girl I used to be, and I don't need to fear or be nervous here.

I am Kate Bishop, the Avenger in charge, the Hawkeye. I don't need to fear anything or anyone.

*

I was pacing back and forth a few meters from the bar, trying to muster the courage to meet the annoying girl who slapped me and delayed my life...

No, damn it... she was probably defending herself... poorly, but still... I hit her that night too... and she didn't delay my life... if anything, she resolved all the crap I created that Christmas.

The memory of that tumultuous night always haunts me, but today, the anxiety was mixed with a strange curiosity and a touch of hope. I have a simple goal to talk to her and I can't be stopped by unfounded nervousness.

It's just Kate Bishop. Just relax. You can just tell the truth. She'll probably be happy.

As I adjusted my now short hair to perfection, I felt again that pang of self-confidence I hadn't experienced in a long time. God, that was the best choice I've ever made. I feel lighter, stronger, more myself. It's really like Sonya said... a haircut makes us feel like a different person, even if the cold wind seemed to cut my face and neck, but I ignored the sensation, focusing only on the mission ahead of me.

That's it... I'm Yelena Belova, the best Black Widow in action... and today I have a single mission. I need to claim a drink that Kate Bishop promised me and talk to her about something important.

As I walked through the doors of the bar she chose, claiming it had a great happy hour at the end of the day, my anxiety increased when I didn't see her anywhere.

Could she not come? No... she wouldn't do that... Despite her initial reluctance, her curiosity about my interest seems to have won out.

The place was moderately crowded, with couples chatting animatedly and groups of friends laughing loudly. The soft light from the lamps created a cozy atmosphere, but the uncertainty of not knowing what I would find after two years left me restless. Every table seemed to have its own story, but none seemed like mine. The smell of some delicious food mixed with the fragrance of expensive perfumes made the place welcoming and, at the same time, suffocating.

It's not really what I thought... I wanted something more intimate and quiet... maybe much less lighting... some better music... but it's okay... I'll respect her choice... she was wise to suggest something like this... but later I'll take us somewhere better. I'm sure.

I chose a table in the most hidden corner, perfect for assessing any possible threat and keeping an eye out for when she arrived. In any mission, it's important to be aware of your surroundings. My eyes scanned the place, observing every detail - the bar at the back, the service counter, the main entrance - looking for any sign of her. The curiosity about how she would be, what she would say, how she would act, was almost suffocating.

God... it's just a girl... it's just Kate Bishop.

Does she still have those arrogant and laid-back manners? Will she walk through that door as if the place belonged to her? Would she smile pathetically at the overly friendly attendant at the front door? The uncertainty was consuming me and, deep down, I hated the feeling of not being in control. My thoughts were interrupted by a waiter who approached with a very unprofessional smile.

"I'm your server today, how can I help you?" he asked, and I sighed, interrupting my survey. His voice was calm, almost rehearsed, as if he had repeated that phrase hundreds of times that same day... The problem was his mischievous smile.

"Not for now, I'm waiting for a girl... I'll order with her..." I replied softly, trying to hide my impatience with his overly attentive gaze.

"Today must be the day for pretty girls abandoned in this hole. First, the Bishop girl and now this?" He murmured as he walked away, and my antennas immediately went up. What did he say? Could she already be here? 

"Hey... you... what did you say?" I stood up suddenly, making him stop in his tracks. He turned, visibly nervous. His face turned pale, and he seemed to be struggling to find a plausible excuse.

"Sorry, miss... I shouldn't... I-I... I'm sorry..." he stammered, worried, but I wasn't willing to let him off so easily. He's lucky I'm off duty. He's too bold. What did he know about Kate Bishop and why did he mention her? She must be here, and I didn't see her.

"Where's the Bishop girl?" I asked threateningly, taking a step forward. He swallowed hard, pointing to the back of the restaurant. His hand trembled slightly as he indicated the direction.

"I... she... there..." He pointed, and I left a courteous pat on his face as thanks. The idea of seeing her again was making me increasingly restless, but now there was no turning back.

"Thank you for your cooperation." I hissed, already turning my eyes to all the occupied tables where he had pointed, and my jaw completely dropped when I found the said woman.

She was in a perfect suit, the small vintage Ray-Bans perched on her nose, and her nervous mannerisms made me go into full stealth mode. She looked elegant, but it was the short strands, with all the skin of her neck exposed, that left me completely stunned. Was she supposed to show up so beautifully for a date she didn't want to come to?

The fact that she was tousling the locks every few seconds didn't help either. She had changed a lot since the last time we saw each other and seemed even more beautiful than before. How do you talk to a woman like that?

Could I just go there, extend my hand, and touch her neck? Could I... Should I? I'm not sure... Maybe I want to. 

I don't know where this impulse came from, but damn it... no one can expect me to meet all the expectations of this shitty world when this shitty world did what it did to me.

Intrusive thoughts acting in 3... 2... 1...

Svyatoye Der’mo, her skin is so... soft... and she seemed cold...

"Hiii!" I said, like I once did in her apartment half-fried, masking my nervousness for a Kate Bishop again perplexed by my arrival. I sighed, deciding to occupy myself, removing my own scarf to cover her cold neck before sitting down. Her silence continued, and I found myself overly self-conscious about how I called her two nights ago and her first response was a no.

"So... the cat still got more pieces of your tongue when you see me..." I joked, crossing my legs, trying to look less nervous than I really was.

"I... I... sorry... how are you, Yelena?" She said, pushing her glasses up to her head, opening a bottle of water to take a sip that also seemed nervous. The eyes seemed the same, but there was a coldness I couldn't explain.

I understand her nervousness. There's really no reason for me to have contacted her. If I'm honest, it was really impulsive to call her, but... it felt right. I need her. After seeing some interviews with her being all methodical and professional a few months ago talking about a terrorist attack her team successfully foiled, not seeking her out was not an option.

If you ask me, I actually took too long to come... I should have looked for her much earlier... but nothing is as urgent as now.

"I am much better now, Kate Bishop..." I said smiling, and she smiled back still looking uncomfortable, resting her elbows on the table to get closer to me. "And you?" I asked softly.

"I confess I'm much more than confused with your visit..." She said in the almost overly condescending tone I remembered having annoyed me the night we had dinner together... Her expression mixed surprise and slight irritation, as if she were trying to understand my intentions.

"I can't contact an old friend for a drink? You were the one who offered... I was around... I mean... why not?" I emphasized, still watching every move of the beautiful woman in front of me. Her eyes seemed to evaluate my every word, looking for a hidden motive.

"Yelena, you can cut your bullshit now and go straight to the point... we both know what happened... what do you want?" She practically exploded impatiently, crossing her fingers over her chin, showing exactly how much she’s no longer a girl. If before she had an air of disorganized and clueless girl, all of that was now being obliterated by the short hair and mature posture.

I need to recalculate my route right here, or this won't work.

"I’m offended by this... why can't this be exactly as I said? Why can't this be about me calling you for a drink?" I said, mimicking her position, trying to avoid letting my own animosity show. The frustration was growing inside me, but I knew losing my temper wouldn't help. More than ever, I knew this couldn't go out of personal character. We can't talk about anything professional today.

"You tried to kill me and my mentor... and caused all that mess... and now, after two years, you show up out of nowhere claiming a drink I offered just to distract you... none of this makes sense..." she said, fanning the air with her hands, looking angry.

Why is she so angry?

Do I want to know? Maybe.

Okay, the damn therapist told me to be polite and try to understand her discomforts first and foremost.

"First and most importantly... I already told you I didn't try to kill you... your mentor, fine, I did try indeed... but I didn't kill... and you… don't be rude... was that drink really just to distract me?" I pointed out resigned, very bothered by the fact that this discussion seemed as useless as the first one.

I didn't come here for this.

*

I couldn’t believe this conversation was actually happening…

I took a deep breath, trying to gather every strand of sanity and maturity within me to deal with the visibly upset woman in front of me. Every muscle in my body was tense, and the room around us seemed to shrink, as if the walls were closing in on us. A wave of heat rose up my neck as I struggled to maintain composure. I can’t afford to lose it here. We're in a public place, and a fight between us would only draw unwanted attention.

I really didn’t need to make a scene, after all. The casual, carefree act of inviting a girl for a drink was being followed by her. She called me, joked, was nice... There's currently no threat in her mannerisms.

When she called me in the middle of the night with an excited voice that was far from my semi-dead state after a complicated mission, I obviously said no to her because, frankly, I had much more important things to do... the most urgent at that moment was to sleep... but I also had a lot more to deal with... such as taking over my family's business the next morning, being a real-time Avenger, and dealing with unwanted fame that came attached to all this accumulation of roles, none of these setbacks made my life easier, if that’s something, right now I feel stressed as hell for not keeping my no.

She wants to know why it was a distraction. Honestly, it wasn't a distraction... I really just called a pretty girl for a drink in the middle of a fight because that was how the old Kate would act. Everything was a huge possibility arising, but that's not the case anymore. I now have too many responsibilities and no time to deal with anyone's bullshit, no matter what... the problems are... little girls... short... hot... very violent... good eyes and short hair perfectly ready for my fingers... Yes... No matter how perfect I find her...

She'll always be the girl who threw me off the fucking building.

And don’t let me forget she cleaned a window with my face…

I let my eyes roam over all the perfection that she is before looking at the bar. Maybe I should just pay the damn drink right away. My raised fingers were met with her attentive gaze, which seemed bothered by my manners. 

I don't give a fuck... I won't fraternize with her.

“Finally you called me! How can I help?” The gossip guy who grumbled about me being too pretty to wait for someone said full of smiles. Too friendly. The little growl that came out of Yelena almost followed me. I took a good look with my very high eyebrows for him to have the nerve to even try, but before I could really say anything, her voice made everything worse.

“I think you forgot what I told you, but I'll apologize to you again… Now… swallow the stupid smile… Me and my girlfriend want the best vodka in the house, two beers, more water... something more, love?” She said between teeth, and I stared at her curiously. He also bothered her. Right. The main point is not that. She was just here saying that I was her girlfriend while threatening an idiot.

“I… uhhh...” My look was up to the rude guy, who was now two steps further, thank God, and then to the woman I have no idea what she came to do here, but who seemed to have her own plan.

Alright. I don't need to argue. I won’t stress myself out with her or him. I have neither time nor patience for this bullshit.

“I want fries...” I said quietly being interrupted by Yelena's laughter and all my attention went back to her. The hoarse, powerful and uncontrolled laughter seemed contagious, but I held myself.

“You can expedite these orders, please?” I sighed to the inconvenient guy still standing by our side and waited until he was out of our reach to look at her again.

“What are you laughing at? What's all this show?” I groaned, leaning on my elbows, and she mimicked my position, letting her eyes carefully analyze me.

“Kate Bishop... just disarm yourself for a moment... Stop shooting imaginary arrows at me when we both know you don't have the courage to shoot the real ones... I just helped you with an idiot... He seemed to think we were losers abandoned... Do as with the fries... Be yourself... It's not as big as it seems...” One of her fingers drew patterns on the table until it touched my wrist below the watch, where my first and only tattoo showed minimally. I watched her touch before seeking her gaze again.

She continued even more gently, almost whispering. “Sorry for laughing... it's just that you were funny with all your tough posture... the suit... this hair... which I admit is making you look very, very good indeed… out of this world…” She smiled shyly winking her eye, and I gasped, waiting. “And then you just asked for fries like a little girl... that was cute... pretty cool…” I didn't even blink in front of her speech. She just seemed to be trying to be kind... and flirting... seriously?

I leaned back in my chair to gain some time and distance, my hands in my pockets helping with the cold but also with the slight tremor of nervousness this situation was causing me. I never expected to have to deal with Yelena again in any possible scenario. In the first few months, I might have become a little too interested... I might have been as determined as Clint to find her... I confess... but I also need to confess that I haven't thought about this woman even once in the past year... and now she's right here, looking all approachable...

"Okay... Let me think about this situation right here... You called me two nights ago with a very simple argument about us having the drink I promised you... Honestly, I just realized I haven't thought about your existence in the past year... and now... You showed up here looking very beautiful, as if it were for a real date... and you're just acting so normally that I don't know if it's part of the character I knew of you... and you helped me with the annoying guy like a common friend would... and you just flirted with me..." I said, pointing at the table, but the words were more for me than for her, and she laughed again. It took a lot from me not to get annoyed with all the smiles but I strengthened quickly.

"Thank you for the compliments... I'm also flattered that you remembered me in the first year... but I didn't flirt with you... yet... I'm just trying to be kind and make everything simpler... it's not like I'm really an expert in human interactions... I actually prefer dogs..." She said playfully, mimicking my position, and I sighed, deciding what to do.

First, I want to return her kindness. She doesn't seem to want a confrontation...

"Alright... By the way, your haircut suits you very well too... You look even more beautiful and it made your eyes clearer... I... really liked it... even though I..." I huffed, uncomfortable with my own haircut, letting my hand mess up my strands.

"Even though what?" She said, leaning on her elbows again, leaning further across the table. Her eyes seemed to map all my reactions. It was just like the day with mac and cheese.

"First... Could you not act like you're interrogating me? You said it was something simple, but you're here seeming willing to force me to play Russian Roulette." I said amused, and she laughed again.

If we're on a date, really, this is going well. She's smiling.

"I never interrogated you, Kate Bishop... Don't be like that... That day, I was just making your dinner after a tiring fight and understanding your involvement level with Barton..." She said, sounding sincere, and I finally smiled. That sounded true.

"Alright... So, what I said earlier about my hair is that... I still haven't gotten used to it... I don't know if this is my cut... I feel naked... there's a lot of unwanted attention... and... thanks for the scarf... I really needed it..." I said, adjusting the fragrant piece around my neck.

"You're wrong... This cut seems to be made for you... It gave you a sense of maturity... I almost didn't recognize you... the drooling idiot was what made me find you... and your new more careful behavior added to it made you seem... God... I really like it..." She said almost nervously, messing up her own strands, and I sighed completely.

Everything about her is just about a woman trying to make her way on a regular date.

Our inconvenient guy arrived with our order, and I didn't respond for a few minutes while enjoying the fries and beer. She seemed calm, drinking her vodka without ever taking her eyes off me. I was dying not knowing how to start a new topic. The new Kate didn't have the patience for small talk anymore, and I honestly questioned how much I had changed and if it was really pleasant.

She reached out to point to the fries shyly, and I smiled, pushing the small basket towards her.

"So... you also seem to have come stunning for a date... one you didn't even want..." She said teasingly, and I chuckled.

"I just came from work, Yelena... You must know about my jobs..." I said casually, and she nodded, thoughtful.

"Yeah... I still know a lot about you... The recluse and now bad-tempered CEO of the newly valuable Bishop Security... and you also managed to become the silly Avenger you've always dreamed of..." She said bitterly, and I straightened up to respond.

"Okay. That sounds a little reactive. Are you still killing people for money?" I bit imitating her tone, and she snorted.

"Careful, Bishop... My best deaths weren't paid for... and I might as well have changed my life..." She said, letting her glass hit the table a little harder.

"Okay... so Russian... You don't need to threaten me again... we're in public... I don't want a scene." I said under my breath.

"I'm not really threatening you either... Sorry..." She quickly emptied, smiling. "What's your favorite color, Kate?" She added impulsively, and I almost choked on my beer before laughing.

"Wow... No Kate Bishop ?” I asked with my eyebrows moving up and down playfully imitating her accent and she groaned impatiently.

“No... although I like the composite thing much more… I actually... With your amazing hair making you look so classic… I should be whispering Katherines all the way…” She said seductively and I practically screamed.

“No. Stop. Kate sounds perfect to me... we don't need that…” I said it both because I hated being called by my full name and because I didn't know how to deal with this woman whispering my name.

“I will call you whatever you need... you need to be comfortable in our date.” She said softly, looking down at her hands. Almost shy. I sighed knowing that I want her at ease today too. 

“So this really is a date, huh? Weird moments, short names… awkward compliments..." I joked, and she snorted laughing.

"Here we go... Since you insisted so much... Yes... this can really be a date... a good one if you want... Now answer." The words sounded harsh, but the smile threatening to escape from her made me feel almost compelled to accept it, I don't really have to deny that.

Two can flirt.

"I like green..." I said, looking straight at the greenish spots in her eyes. "Sometimes I like gold..." I just wanted to test, and it worked. Yelena Belova just blushed at my words.

"That was really good... a good flirt, Katherine..." She laughed, eating another fry, and I growled, feeling myself blushing too. 

Her voice…

"Bold of you to assume I was flirting..." I lied completely trying to get myself together, and she laughed even more.

"Bold of you to think you can lie to a Black Widow who specializes in facial micro expressions." She said, pulling out a small packet of peanuts from her pocket to refill our almost empty basket of fries. I watched curiously as she picked out a few to peel.

"I could have bought you some, you didn't need to bring them from home..." I said teasingly, and she snorted, throwing one directly into my mouth. I widened my eyes.

"These peanuts that everyone sticks their dirty hands into? No, thank you." She said disgustedly.

"Who knew you were so picky?" I teased, and the expected reaction came within seconds. She attacked me with fingers snapping against my forehead, but the next move left me completely speechless.

Her hand grabbed both ends of the scarf and she wrapped it around her hand, pulling me towards her. "Maybe you should have kept your mature posture..." I held on with both hands to the edges of the table, determined to have my own moves, moving even closer.

I saw in her eyes the curiosity as to why I wasn't afraid of her and smiled in the most scoundrel way I could because I was feeling the old Kate in my bones urging me to provoke Yelena.

"Oh really... and what if I don't want to?" I said, keeping all the attitude, and she snorted, looking disturbed. Her gaze over my entire face was beyond curious... She really seemed to like what she saw.

"Kate Bishop... you're full of tricks..." She said, slowly releasing the scarf before pouring herself another vodka and mumbling under her breath how I continued to be the same annoying person as always.

"Oh, don't be angry... I'm just messing with you... now tell me more about the Widows... sounds like something I would invest my money in..." I said reaching for her glass to have the too potent vodka corroding my insides.

"Slow down, Hawkeye..." She laughed, taking another sip, being careful to drink exactly where I did. She began explaining everything about the Widows' trade, seeming genuinely excited and proud. I listened carefully. It seemed as big as Clint had explained to me. I already knew most of what she told me, but hearing it right from the source was different.

"And now... with what you know about the Widows... what would you invest in?" She said curiously, and I sighed for the entire scene of the incredible woman who is dedicating her life to liberating other women.

I shook my head to focus. "Ahhh... there's so much a crazy rich woman like me could do to help..." I began laying out all my ideas about shelters... scholarship programs at Bishop... Job vacancies... Advisory... she listened attentively before crossing her arms and looking at the bar ceiling too closely.

"Well... maybe that could be the subject of our third date..." She said mischievously and I scoffed.

"Third?" I wanted to know and she laughed.

"Yes... Girls' night... tonight and then business meeting..." She counted on her fingers and I laughed aloud.

"Alright... so that's four... I want to include in this that awkward moment of not being able to shoot you..." I said looking away from her, seeing how the heavy night was being filled by snow, remembering everything about those days.

"I agree... good times... except that no... now keep updating me... How's everything with your mom?" She asked carefully and I explained everything about the trial that happened a few months ago.

"You don't seem happy..." She stated and I found myself sad in the mirror behind her.

"She didn't want to talk to me since that day... and I don't have much to say about it..." I said softly and she reached for my hand on the table.

"Subject for future dates?" She said again returning to gentle humor and I smiled nodding.

"You're so cheesy... all about dates... all about kindness..." I teased lightly enchanted with all the almost soft manners of the woman who one day I thought would kill me... one that frankly came here thinking it would kill me... I mean... I still don't know.

"So you don't want to kill me today, really, do you?" I asked feeling the alcohol giving me all the courage I needed and she laughed loudly releasing my hand to kick my boots.

"I should kill you just for talking that nonsense... so annoying... I didn't come here to kill you... quite the opposite." She rolled her eyes harshly.

"Hey... it's an honest question... you just left that day and then..." I mimicked how she threw herself out the window slightly throwing me in the chair next to her and she broke completely laughing cursing what I think should be what a Russian sailor would say.

"You're just a stupid drunk. Get up..." She said sitting me in the chair looking around and I couldn't care less. We'll probably have pics of this tomorrow, but fuck it... probably no one is calling us... Everyone here must be doing exactly like us.

"I'm not that drunk, and don't worry about who might see us... now... what I really want to talk about is how you said ‘Do not get in my way again’ and now you're here in my way... not only are you in my way... you're practically licking that same way... flattering me... and being the best date I've ever had..." I said without a trace of doubt, and she sighed softly.

"Ah... that... I don't... I don't exactly know what I'm doing... I was just in town for a work meeting... saw you on TV looking all sexy and explanatory... it's not some grand plan of fate or anything... although I haven't forgotten about you like you said you forgot about me..." She said with an adorable pout, and I groaned, hiding my face in my hands.

"God... how can someone so dangerous be so cute? Stop making me like you, woman!" I said still in my hands, and she laughed.

"I still can't help you with that... and well... how do you think I attract my targets?" She said returning to being roguish, and I warmed up to everything she was doing right here.

In many ways, she was reminding me of how fun I used to be... It's like I could feel the permanent crease on my forehead undoing itself and my jaw loosening. Refreshing is the term.

The next few hours were spent like this. A careful and brisk conversation between two girls who didn't want to admit to an irregular and very disorganized flirtation but were not giving up on pleasing. I know I was trying my hardest now and felt the same from her.

"So, let me get this straight... You're now a nanny to little Avengers?" She laughed genuinely after I mentioned the age of my team. The alcohol in me was making me soft and much more comfortable speaking about any subject without reservations. I just know I'm safe.

"I'm not their nanny... don't offend me... I'm the leader of the youngest and most efficient team in the Avengers Initiative... We have a 100% success rate in our missions... no casualties... safe missions... They're good kids... mature for their age..." I defended my team as always.

"You sound like a proud babysitting aunt." She said, throwing a peanut at me, and I growled, throwing one back at her.

"And you... what kind of crazy missions have you been involved in?" Yelena laughed, picking up the peanut I threw back and delicately placing it in her mouth. Her eyes sparkled with a mix of mischief and curiosity as she pondered her answer.

"Ah, Kate Bishop, my missions are... diverse. From intricate thefts to discreet eliminations. You know how the business goes... but I'm thinking of changing my life... maybe with your help..." She said with a corner smile, clearly challenging me to deny it, and I sighed, grasping the deal, really not wanting to understand, but very willing to help.

"That sounds dangerous. I can certainly help you with whatever you need... as I said... Bishop Security has room for your qualifications..." I commented, trying not to sound too excited, although a part of me was.

"Don't get too excited... I may just be looking for something dangerous enough to keep things interesting." She replied, grabbing another fry that had just arrived at the table with a graceful gesture. She pulled out a small bottle of sauce from her pocket again, which had me laughing.

"You're not gonna stop pulling tricks out of your pockets, huh?" I joked, and she sighed, slipping her hand into her pocket to come back with a closed fist. In a second, I was curious, and the next I was laughing at the middle finger she showed me.

"Bitch." I laughed throwing a fry at her which squeaked between the laughter.

I pondered what to say next when an unexpected doubt arose. "And by the way... how have things been with Clint? He explained a bit to me about it, but I didn't really understand..." I casually asked, interested in learning more about the mysterious woman who seemed to have such a profound effect on my mentor and... on me.

She blinked, clearly caught off guard. "Ah... that's... it was painful... I'm not sure if I've really dealt with it yet... or what to tell you... I know he's looking for me but I'm not ready..." She replied, choosing her words carefully, but I understood the silent plea for silence.

"I understand, don't worry, I won't interfere... and know that I'll be available for that conversation from now on..." I murmured, touching her hand as she had done before, feeling there was more to uncover, but deciding not to press.

The night was unfolding in a fun and engaging way, and I didn't want to ruin the light mood with delicate issues. Instead, I shifted focus to something less incendiary. "So, what do you do when you're not... on missions?" I probed, trying to uncover a more personal side of Yelena.

She smiled, as if appreciating the change of topic. "I like cooking... I like to pretend I'm a clueless tourist in different parts of the world... and training... I think it's good to keep the mind sharp and the body ready for anything..." She replied, her expression softening a bit.

"That makes sense..." I agreed, thinking about how our lives were different in many ways, for example... I can't cook to save my life. "The cooking thing sounds... sexy... I'd like to learn... maybe another date..." I joked completely, and she chuckled, throwing more peanuts at me.

"Now speaking of sexy things, tell me about that tattoo?" She growled, reaching for my wrist to see it up close, and I blushed shyly at her finding something so simple sexy.

"Ah... that was just me being silly with my happiness at getting what I wanted..." I said, recalling the day I was finally appointed as an Avenger.

"I figured it was about that... I have a desire to get some..." She said excitedly, pointing to various places on her body where she would like to have dog tattoos... Natasha... the symbol of the Black Widow... I listened attentively to it all.

"Maybe that's something I can make happen for you... we could get tattoos together one of these days..." I offered, and she sighed under her breath, something about it seeming reckless on my part, but I didn't mind.

As we continued talking, the night quickly advanced, each of us revealing a bit more about our worlds and our lives. The atmosphere between us was a mix of tension and camaraderie, as if we were dancing around something neither of us wanted to fully admit.

We’re compatible...

And so, amidst laughter, confessions, and another round of drinks, we slowly let down our defenses and allowed a new kind of connection to form. In many ways, despite being so different, we were strangely alike. I had never been on a date like this before.

The quieter the noise in the bar became, the lighter I felt from the alcohol, though I wasn't really drunk, just deeply immersed in the tension between us that only grew. I wanted to know if we would be compatible in more than just this... but I didn't dare push beyond making this date pleasant and kind.

So after one more round of vodka, I decided it was time to go home. I did have commitments tomorrow... A new team was being formed and I needed to be there.

"Hey... I think my bedtime is coming..." I said, yawning loudly. "I have an important meeting... something about a new group... can I walk you back to where you're staying?" I offered gently, and she smiled.

"Don't worry... we'll do better... I'll walk you home... you've had a bit to drink... and then I'll head back to my hotel, which isn't far from here either."

I paid the bill after a brief argument that I won with the simple argument that I had offered first, and we left the bar, walking side by side through the quiet streets of the city. The cold of the night was almost a welcome relief from the warmth of the bar and the growing tension between us.

"You walked here in the cold?" She said, her hands tucked into the pockets of her coat, and I watched her closely. She now wore a beanie covering her hair and ears, making her look even more adorable. A small snowflake landed on her nose and I instinctively moved closer, stopping in the middle of the sidewalk.

"May I?" I asked softly, and she sighed in agreement. I touched just enough and she cursed loudly.

"Damn your cold hands... where are your gloves?" She said, annoyed, and I smiled, tucking my hands into my jacket.

"I forgot... Today was a messy day... I was in a meeting and I hadn't even decided if I would actually come... so I just walked over here." I explained, leading us across the street.

"Would you have left me waiting?" She asked sadly, and I sighed.

"Yelena... honestly... Do you think a normal person would have come? After the threat you made?" I said quietly, stopping on the sidewalk and she breathed, stopping too.

"I get your point... but I assured you I wouldn't hurt you..." She defended herself childishly, and I smiled.

"It's not how things work for ordinary, not incredible people like you, Yelena... I know your experiences are quite opposite to mine... but it's not that hard... when someone throws you off a building and would kill a man for revenge... you just avoid... understand?" I said, starting to walk again, but she kept up and stepped in front of me... keeping her pace slow.

"I want to remake my promise... I won't hurt you... and you'll never need to worry about crossing my way again..." She said very effectively, literally crossing my way.

"Even though you're literally stepping on my way... I also would never hurt you... I already told you how grateful I am... for not having killed you?" I said with the sole purpose of keeping her laughing and didn't fail.

She filled the night with her rough and boisterous laughter.

"Again with that shit... very funny... never loses its charm... you wouldn't have killed me and if you had time to hurt me... my suit and enhancement would keep me alive until I healed..." She explained, starting to walk again beside me.

"If that's how you want to tell it..." I shrugged. "...but I still think an arrow through your eyes wouldn't give you that much time..." I smiled, looking at her.

"Have you ever shot someone in the face?" She said disbelievingly and it was my turn to laugh.

"Of course not, for God's sake, woman... I'm an Avenger... I don't hurt people..." I said proudly.

"Yes, I know... you Avengers just get hurt and let yourselves die... sacrifice yourselves for others..." She said with the saddest voice I've ever heard another human use.

I didn't wait to imitate her previous movement of walking in front of her. I slowed our pace by having her hold me by the lapels of my jacket diverting me from a post and I kept shaking because of how all the move made us almost collided for a few seconds.

"Hey... I want to do something I didn't do that night... that day... I feel like I hurt you by talking about Natasha as collateral damage... she wasn't... and I'm sorry for having said it that way... I understand much better today the weight of her choices..." I said honestly and she who never released my lapels guided me to a nearby wall. The move wasn't so gentle... I waited to be attacked... but instead I saw the teary eyes.

“I accept your apologies... I'm sorry for threatening you... I was... still am hurt... but I'm better now,” she said softly, releasing me to tuck her hands into her coat.

I glanced down the street again and saw she had stopped us there to avoid bumping into a group of guys.

“C’mon... we can go now... while they might not have thought of anything... I don't want to have to fight with stupid and disrespectful boys on my day off... Your new fantastic haircut would definitely catch their attention.” She said playfully, touching my hair, leading us down the street now with her arm linked in mine.

As if only me were worthy of worship…

We walked in silence because I was still pensive about the whole situation. Yelena is an amazing girl who had every reason in the world to be different... but despite the violence and everything that happened to her... she still seemed to remain pure.

In front of my building, I sighed knowing I wasn't ready to leave her presence just yet. I know what I want to try... a proper date, but I wouldn't presume... not with someone as unique as Yelena Belova.

“This is where I live now,” I said, looking up, and she smiled, following my gaze.

“Much better than that dumpster on fire from before.” She smiled, and I reached for her hand on my arm.

“Listen... if you want to break into my window... you can... whenever you want... and as much as we joked and flirted all night... this could still just be about us being friends... I need you to know that.” I said softly, still touching her hand, surprising myself when she leaned in on tiptoes and kissed my cheek.

“Break into your window? Wow... I appreciate the offer... maybe I'll show up…” she said, looking amused, and I smiled shyly, glancing both ways down the street.

Damn it.

“Well... I promise more drinks and crazy conversations... You have my number and know where I live... penthouse... windows facing east... drop by anytime.” I said, almost wanting to cover my mouth.

Windows facing east? Smooth.

She squeezed my hand, and I remembered I was still holding the hand I hadn't let go of and didn't know if I wanted to.

“I'll keep that in mind, Kate... Now go away.” she said playfully shooing me before taking a step back from me. I smiled wistfully, waving as I entered the building, and she disappeared from my view in a few seconds. I huffed at myself for not inviting her better... but it is what it is... I had a good time with her and I'll take that.

No, stupid, you're just an idiot who could have had an even better night.

She'll disappear again and I'll never see her again. Damn it.

Windows facing east... I huffed impatiently, punching my thigh.

The silence in the elevator was thick, laden with something I couldn't quite explain. Yelena just popped out of nowhere, behaved all night like an old friend... no... scratch that... she behaved like on a real date and I would recognize that. She was acting like a very cool girl very interested in everything about me. I remembered our conversation of the last 4 hours knowing it all was natural and filled the space between us, it was like both of us were aware of the growing magnetism that drew us closer and closer from the moment I decided not to shoot at her.

I can't believe I invited her to jump my window instead of a regular invitation…

*

"Kate... dude, why did you take so long? I went out to call you..." Peter ran to me impatiently and I huffed, stopping in the complex kitchen to prepare a coffee.

I was still trying to locate myself in the world, my night was a complete shit, I could barely nail my eyes remembering the perfect date with the perfect girl that I simply will never see again.

Windows facing east. Fucking Hell.

We won't even discuss the fact that the light hangover on me seemed as harmful as a complete hangover right now.

"Peter, way less noise. I'm hungover, I didn't sleep very well... and now isn't a good time... I'm not that late..." I muttered as I got on my speak stand up to hide my face in my arms while I waited for the coffee to drip slowly. 

Should this crap drop sooo sloooow and loud?

"You are indeed late, too much... one full hour... you are due for a meeting that's ongoing... Sam's feeling sad." He said, all is impatience.

There's nothing to make me loose my peace today.

"Pete... unless there's another invasion of this damn city or an attack on this building specifically... nothing will stop me from having this cup of coffee first... I'll join the meeting in a few minutes... go in and let them know I've arrived... say I'm sick if you want... just give me five minutes of peace, kid." I growled, not leaving my safe cocoon.

The coffee maker finally signaled that I could become a functional human being, and I took a deep breath before straightening my suit and minimally combing my hair with my fingers. No, it’s not stupid... she loved it... said I looked wonderful and mature. I whimpered inwardly at the thought.

Windows facing east. UGH.

I quickly downed my coffee as I walked to the meeting room. My steps around the perimeter of the room where someone was explaining something were meant to be quiet, but as soon as I leaned against the pillar to listen without disturbing anyone, Sam growled for everyone’s attention.

“And there at the back... we finally have the future of the Avengers initiative, the girl who can do absolutely everything except be on time for an important meeting... Ladies and gentlemen... the girl who wears a $40,000 suit better than anyone, Katherine Bishop aka Hawkeye... Leader of the Young Avengers Initiative... Future leader of the main initiative.” He said, almost angrily, and I huffed, feeling even more irritated by the unnecessary exposure. I took a deep breath, knowing I didn't need to be kind or apologize right now, then.

I walked over to the chair at the head of the table, probably previously occupied by him, and sat down heavily. "If I'm really that important, you shouldn't be talking to me like that…" I said, sipping my coffee, still trying to maintain my peace.

I heard more than saw the murmurs around the table as I turned in the chair to face the huge screen and him. I pointed at the screen, telling him to continue, and he huffed.

“Okay, folks... our little birdie must have had a terrible night, hence the bad mood... she’s usually much nicer...” He said, kicking at my boots with a smile, and I knew all the bad feelings were already forgotten.

“Just stop talking about me, Sammy, and continue your meeting... besides... I don't even know why we're here...” I smiled, turning in my chair to see the meeting agenda on the table “...and sorry everyone-” I groaned, lifting my eyes to the other participants, and then all the air left me. I tried to stand but couldn't, in a second, I was on the floor, drenched in my coffee, my head throbbing, and everyone gasping in surprise.

The lights came on, and I saw everyone looking at me horrified.

“What the hell is wrong with you today, Kate?” America laughed, and I huffed, touching my head.

“She’s hungover...” Peter said quietly.

“I didn’t even know she started drinking again.” Kamala barked, laughing.

“I can’t believe she didn’t take us with her!” Eli complained.

“Is there blood?” The concerned voice that hadn't left me even in my dreams asked from somewhere, and I resigned myself. I’m not dreaming. She’s really here.

Why the hell is she here?

Oh…

Last night…

The new group...

Yes... okay... as I suspected... it wasn’t a date... she lied... she said the date with me was without any interest... it was just for the drinks... how foolish I was... she just... lied…

I stood up, feeling dizzy not only from hitting my head but from everything combined. I cleaned the coffee off my suit, feeling humiliated for interrupting something work-related and for being foolish. I was really naive in this. She could be an enemy. I should have kept the new Kate in charge and then I wouldn’t have wasted time thinking about her.

No mistakes. I can fix this now.

“Sorry, I’m really hungover and shouldn’t have come here. To the new Avengers ... welcome.” I said ironically, knowing exactly whom I was targeting by using the much-hated term before walking out of the room.

*

I hadn't even finished my shower when I heard the murmuring in my room at the complex. All the Young Idiots must be perched on my bed, eagerly waiting for gossip.

“Can’t you guys give me some privacy, even when I’m having a shitty day?” I said, walking to my closet still wrapped in a towel, feeling even more annoyed to see that there were only hoodies available.

Ironic as hell that I’m thinking like the idiot Kate from before shouldn’t have shown up last night, and here I am having to dress like her again.

I grabbed the damn outfit and headed back to the bathroom, getting dressed with more disdain than ever.

“C’mon, Kate... we just want to live vicariously through you... it seems like it was a wild night...” Teddy whined loudly, and I slammed the door before heading back to them.

“You don’t look like you got railed tho...” Billy teased, and I growled, even more frustrated with this whole shitty situation.

“I’m not telling you anything... and besides... today is a workday... everyone to the training hall, now.” I said, shooing them off my bed.

“The new team is training there...” Peter warned.

“I don’t care. They’ll leave eventually. It’s our space.” I growled.

“You missed the meeting... they’re crazy... kind of villains... and then there’s James Barnes... and an old guy who kept asking Sam things about Captain America...” Kamala was babbling as I marched down the hallway.

“God... and there’s that hot little badass... I’d fuck her brains out any time of day... Are all Black Widows as hot as her?” He growled, grabbing his junk, and I stopped in my tracks, grinding my teeth. This took away any remaining feeling of peace within me. Without a second thought, I stepped up to Eli and kneed him right where he was being an idiot. He fell to his knees, whimpering.

Fuck if he's a super-soldier. Balls are balls.

“Do not refer to a colleague like that, you moron. Haven’t you learned to respect me after all the beatings? She’s much worse than I am. She’ll kill you if she even dreams that you talked about her like that! Apologize.” I said, pointing a firm finger at his pained face.

“It was just a comment. You didn’t have to... fuck... I’m a super-soldier... I could take you down... I can certainly defend myself against her. I’m not apologizing.” He said arrogantly as always.

“Yeah? Fine... let’s see.” I lifted him and pushed him all the way to the training hall, throwing him into the middle of the mat.

I took a good look at all the unfamiliar faces in the hall. A giant old soldier. A guy dressed up as Captain America. The idiot with the metal arm who doesn’t talk to anyone when he visits Sam. A woman with a disfigured face, smiling. Another woman who looked like she’d been crying. And her... the lying bitch.

“Today is our training day. As the one responsible for the initiative, I should tell you all to leave, but I need someone to teach this kid how to respect a woman. You, Black Widow... the guy on the floor thinks you’re a hot little badass... and he thinks he could fuck you anytime.” I growled without even looking at her.

“He what?” She said, confused.

“Yeah, he uses terms like that frequently... he’s a young man with a history of disrespecting women in command... I thought you might have some training to teach him good manners... Do you mind?” I finally looked at her, crossing my arms.

“Kate, that’s not necessary...” Billy said beside me, and I smiled.

“I want all the Young Avengers, in Silence, now. Widow?” I growled furiously, still keeping my gaze on her, and she huffed.

“I’m not going to hit a kid, Kate.” She said, crossing her arms, and I growled, going to grab my bow from the back of the room, aiming my first shot next to Eli’s head.

“If someone doesn’t teach him, I will. Start running, Eli.” I said, shooting between his legs now. He stood up, angry.

“Kate, please... we don’t need this...” He said, running towards me, only to be hit by my bow on his legs.

He got up and tried to attack me again. “Eli... you can’t beat me even with the stupid serum.” I laughed, and he looked furious as he grabbed the weights next to the mat to throw at me.

I dodged, shooting an arrow into his thigh at the least dangerous spot possible, and he growled, ripping the arrow out before using his damn speed to reach me. We’ve done this too many times, it never lost its charm. I caught Peter’s eye as he took his usual position, using his webs to stop a punch that would surely have crushed my head. That’s my boy.

“Do you need help now, Hawkeye?” Eli groaned, sitting on top of me to reach my neck. “I think you’re just jealous... don’t worry... I’d fuck you again... better... I’d fuck both of you together...” He said quietly, and I growled, trying to break free without success. I was furious, salivating to give him the beating he deserved as always... I just needed to wait for the peak of his serum to wear off in two minutes, and then he’d pay dearly.

It wasn’t necessary to wait, the next second, he was yanked off me, and Yelena had him in her attack of kicks and punches. He couldn’t dodge. She’s small, agile, and just as strong as him. She would be the one to show him.

I leaned on my elbows, watching the scene before anyone else approached. The giant man sat next to me, smiling like a child.

A huge, hairy hand reached out for a handshake. "I am Alexei... her father... I'm honored to be in the presence of someone who defends my daughter's honor with arrows," he said in a boisterous, loud voice. I sat, surprised, looking at his hand and then at Yelena, who was smashing Eli's face with her elbow.

Yelena has a father? A hero father? What else did this girl fail to tell me during our date yesterday?

Don't be an idiot... it wasn't even a real date.

I took the man's hand. "I'm Kate." I said simply. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Alexei." I said, smiling shyly.

"You can also call me Red Guardian." he said pompously, putting on his helmet and pointing to himself as if I should recognize him. I nodded affirmatively.

"Oh yes... I know... we've heard a lot about you." I said politely, standing up as I saw Eli no longer responding to the attacks.

"It's truly a pleasure, but I need to help my soldier... your little girl must have taught him the lesson I needed..." I said, waving goodbye and walking towards them.

"Enough, Yelena." I said harshly, trying to grab her shoulder, and she snapped her arm at me.

"Don't touch me." she growled, still hitting the idiot boy's face. "He needs to apologize first."

"I'm not going to apologize to either of you," he said loudly. "Kate, if you don't stop this, she's going to kill me... and if she doesn't kill me, I'll tell Sam everything." He childishly threatened me, and it was my turn to growl. 

Who the hell does this boy think he is?

"Yelena... you know what you did to me... that thing with rubbing the face... I think your boot is dirty..." I said, sitting on the ground next to them, and she looked at me before laughing and lifting Eli's limp body. His face was on one of her boots.

"Now, besides apologizing... you'll need to kiss my favorite boot. You heard the lady." she said, still smiling, keeping his arm at a sickening angle.

He moaned in pain as she twisted it even more.

"C’mon, Eli... you know you're wrong... just apologize to the lady... show her you're not a savage, and maybe she won't kill you. Believe me, she will... she didn't kill Clint Barton by pure luck." I said quietly, and he turned his face to me.

"You two know each other? Oh... she's the girl you were obsessed with before, isn't she?" Eli said happy, making me freeze. Yelena looked at me curiously, and Eli continued with his machine gun of crap. "So, sorry, Yelena... I didn't know... Kate defended your honor... I thought she was jealous of me, but it was of you. I'm sorry for offending your girl, Katie." He laughed completely, kissing Yelena's boot, and she let go of him to look at me curiously.

Eli kissed my cheek and quickly crawled away, probably afraid of Yelena, but I couldn't move, and we both stayed there, just measuring each other. She was about to speak, but we were interrupted by Sam's voice.

"Formation!" He shouted, making everyone get organized to hear what he would say. She stood up, extending her hand to me, but I refused, getting up on my own to go with the others.

"I see you all are getting chummy. Eli... I heard part of the crap. Disrespect someone here again, and you'll deal with me. Or with all the guys gathered... you seem to have a special taste for disrespecting only the girls... maybe you need to learn from real men." He growled in Eli's face, who nodded, apologizing.

"As mentioned in the meeting... the two teams are separate in missions but have the same goal... The purpose is to support... to protect each other mutually. For this, there needs to be respect. You need to learn to deal with differences... John, James, and I had our differences, and now we need to work together... and that's how it works... we'll be on three different fronts... but this isn't about leadership... while James and I have more experience in the initiative... the leaders of the Young Avengers and Thunderbolts initiative will be two women... Kate Bishop and Yelena Belova will be respected no matter what." I widened my eyes at her and then at Sam.

So the whole nonsense of changing life was about this. She was coming to the right side. Ok. That was probably why she looked for me. That's good, but it doesn't erase the lie. She should have told me on the call at three o'clock in the morning.

"We'll do some simple combat exercises now in the simulator, focusing on the enhanced... and then we'll all go out together to have fun." Sam offered, drawing cheers from the younger kids who loved going out with Sam.

I raised my hand, asking for the floor, and everyone looked at me curiously as they dispersed.

"Sam... I'm not feeling well... I'm going home now... I'm not in the mood for training or fun." I said, and he huffed.

"Kate..." He was going to try to convince me, but I moved ahead, walking towards the exit.

"I'm not asking for permission, Sam." I said, already leaving.

*

The main point of the mess I'm in is… I've gotten into a lot of trouble in the last two years… The biggest of them was going back to work with Valentina…

She ended up putting together a complicated team that obviously didn't work under her command. To cut the story short, we got rid of Valentina as everyone wanted, and Barnes convinced us to keep this nonsense going… and worse… he convinced us to meet his best friend, who let me tell you… Sam can make you sell your heart. The man simply gave us a damn hero speech, talked about my sister, talked about the damn Hawkeyes, made me cry, and here I am in one of the branches of the damn Avengers initiative.

He literally convinced me to come on this damn suicide mission. Yes, I've been on the verge of killing myself since the moment Sam had to ask for silence in the meeting with Kate's idiot kids.

I agreed to come here because of her, but I didn't know everything here was so chaotic.

I've been successfully running away from Clint Barton for two whole years, but I could always have been found by Kate Bishop. The drink she offered me was really not forgotten. I just didn't know if she could be trusted not to hand me over to Clint… or the police… She handed over her own mother… Not that I was in any danger from either of these threats… but I still didn't want to take risks.

My lie about an uninterested date was a mistake. Not that I didn't want a date with her, but I really wanted to decide if I wanted to work on this… I wanted to connect with her… have some support… have her help with this… This is also a lie. I really wanted a full-on date… And I sought it out… and I insisted… I gave us that… and tried to really get to know her… I'm sure we had a good date. Nothing about it was a mistake or lie…

It was so good and so perfect that I prayed to all the heavens that she would invite me up after the date… I was itching to talk more with her… to touch her… to feel more of that incredible hair… to kiss her… God… this girl's presence set me on fire in so many ways… I felt alive… after all the animosity, she looked at me like she wanted to know everything about me… So it was only natural that I wanted to keep exploring everything we were yesterday…

But, I didn't count on the changes Kate might have gone through in that time. I thought we would sit for a beer… that she would be open… and then it would be fun… I would tell her the truth… she would probably be happy to finally have me on the side of the damn heroes she loves so much… but no… she was no longer an impressionable girl… She was now a woman who needed to be impressed.

Her whole show of violence today with the idiot boy… and the way she did all that to defend me. I wanted to stop everything and just talk to her… like we did on the date… but I didn't have the courage. The old Kate would probably follow me anywhere… listen to my nonsense to the end… but this new Kate… cold… impartial and tough… no… this woman understood my lie the second she saw me today… She just understood. I saw it in her eyes. This new Kate… was more than willing not to listen to any crap, but I needed to try to explain.

I didn't dare climb her window last night because I didn't have the courage. She seemed nervous, talked about me going up in the worst way. So instead, I spent two hours in front of her building like some kind of shitty stalker.

Exactly like I'm doing now. Now I would climb her window, just because she said I could yesterday.

My hook took me to the top, and I quickly looked through all the windows to the east as she said in a very old-Kate way. I wanted to laugh at her nonsense, but it was better this way… I would have much more to apologize for today if I had gone up. No… it’s much worse… I couldn't apologize like now if I had gone up yesterday… because for a fact… if I had gone up yesterday…

In the last windows, I saw her lying in the middle of a huge room with the dog completely on top of her. The ice pack on her forehead told me she still hadn't recovered from the hangover, but that's okay, I'll fix that, luckily I brought things to cook for her the soup my dad taught me.

As soon as the training ended, I didn't tell anyone before I fled to my car. It wasn't an option to stay any longer in the same environment as those noisy people, the idiots on my team already did enough to make my eye twitch, but the kids… God… I can't believe the level of patience Kate must have to deal with all of them… No wonder the woman is so upset and has matured so much…

I got everything I needed on the way to my hotel because I wanted to please the woman with some food and give her much more adulation just like she said I gave yesterday. Then I hurried to dress again as if I were going to the best date. Maybe not so much… I just wanted to be comfortable… I wanted to show her the real Yelena… no Black Widow… no traumatized woman… just the girl now much healthier and who has been trying in the last few years to live as normal a life as possible.

I had almost everything I needed to go to her… The only thing I still didn’t have was the guts to face her understandable bad mood.

I heard a muffled bark and realized that Lucky, her dog that she spent an entire hour talking about, already knew I was here, so I decided to try my luck. She’s already mad at me, an invasion is the least of it.

I opened the hinges of the huge window more easily than I opened the old, creaky door of her dumpster on fire. This woman works with security but can’t ensure the safety of her own home? It’s absurd if you ask me.

The moment I stepped onto the window sill, she spoke loudly.

“You could at least have been quieter… The dog could have gotten you killed…” She said, still in her place on the floor as I fully entered and closed the window, sealing it quickly with a good special glue. Maybe this will ensure some security until I… Yes… I will come back to make secure all the damn windows and doors of this woman’s house.

The dog came to my feet, growling and barking softly, and I let my fingers gently touch behind his ears. “Hello again, good boy… It’s been a minute, you’re still lovely.” I completely cooed.

“And you could have better security… just the cute dog isn’t enough… aren’t you like a billionaire security magnate?” I growled, dropping the bags that were turning my fingers purple from the effort of carrying them up 18 floors. 

“Well… not all the security in the world can prevent criminals from having contact with me… As you can prove… I’m stupid enough to think I’m on a date with them. So it doesn’t matter… a criminal here… one in a bar… one at my job… it really doesn’t matter…” She said, getting up to walk to the kitchen, throwing the bag in the sink before looking for some medicine in a box.

I decided to start fixing what I really could.

“And what about criminals who bring things for a miracle soup that cures hangovers and makes you feel new in 20 minutes?” I said, picking up the bags to bring them to the counter, pointing to them foolishly. “Ta-daaan.”

“I’d say criminals are criminals and that I don’t want your soup… I’d also say for you to choose if you want to leave through the window you came in or the door. And yes… Don’t let the door or window hit your ass on the way out.” She said, giving a small wave before going down a long hallway and loudly slamming what I think is her bedroom door.

See? She’s definitely not impressed by my nonsense anymore.

I stood frozen with my hands on the counter, thinking about how to fix this, and I decided that I don’t know what to do… and when I don’t know what to do… I cook… I’m going to make the damn soup… and then I’ll decide… like everything in my new life.

The dog was following me the whole time in the kitchen while I cut my ingredients, always asking for a bite, and I obliged every time. I hummed softly while doing all this, feeling my whole body calm down from the day’s exhaustion and stress.

I didn’t expect her to welcome me with open arms. I know the simple fact that I wasn’t completely honest yesterday is taking its toll on this situation.

The most important thing is that I came to stay, and if she won’t talk to me… I’ll keep trying every day… We now have to work together… I know where she lives… Even if I have to jump the damn window every night… I’ll keep trying.

After an hour and a half of trying unsuccessfully, I sat at the counter waiting for all the cooking to be done when I heard the door that had been slammed before open. I didn’t leave before, and I wouldn’t leave now… Not until my soup was ready. There’s no discussion about that.

“I know the police wouldn’t stand a chance against you… or even the army… the national guard… there’s no one I can report your crime to, right?” She said, leaning beside me with her elbows on the counter.

“I guess not… maybe my dad… I didn’t tell you yesterday, but I’m totally daddy’s little girl…” I said, smiling suspiciously, and she snorted.

“Yes, you have a dad… He introduced himself to me today… but I don’t think that man with the doting daddy aura would solve my problem… You must have the old man wrapped around your finger… Maybe if I call my own daddy… Clint Barton… then you’d finally leave my house…” She said, leaving her phone on the counter in front of me, showing a picture of the old man surrounded by kids on the screen.

I swallowed hard because I truly don’t know if I wanted to deal with him. I looked hard at the door, thinking of all the escape options. I know I’ll eventually have to deal with Barton, but I’m absolutely sure I need to do it on my terms. Maybe if I talk a little about my fears, she’ll understand. I need her, of all people in the world, to understand my fears.

“You know what else we didn’t talk about yesterday… I’ve been going to therapy…” I said nervously, picking at my nails, praying she wouldn’t cut me off while I talk about this crap. I need to go straight to what really made me change many things in my life.

"Yeah? And didn't that shitty therapist tell you how lying to people who care about you is bad?" she snapped, turning off her phone screen, and I sighed, crossing my legs into a lotus position, now facing her.

So she does care? I searched her eyes, trying to feel that, but she still seemed nothing but aloof. I spent hours yesterday undoing that look in her, and here it was again.

Okay, I can and will do this.

"When I talked about what happened that Christmas… I talked about you two… I talked about how one stupid bird incited everything bad in me… and how the other beautiful and annoying birdie opened my eyes… I told about the conversation you and I had that day… and it was…" I said softly, and she laughed.

"Is it a woman or a man treating you?" she asked quickly, and I looked at her curiously.

"It's a woman… Marie… a slightly grumpy French woman who calls me petite musaraigne… " I said, letting my French roll off my tongue, and she laughed out loud.

"Did you tell her how you threatened me that day?" she wanted to know, even more amused. This is like yesterday… I need to soften her with smiles to be heard.

"Kind of… I told her how painful it was to have that conversation with a stranger about my sister… I told her how I wanted to talk to you again after everything… because you were the person who helped me start getting out of the revenge aura…" I said, remembering how it was after I talked to Clint. "And I also thought about looking for you… after breaking down in my moment with Clint… I had what I now know was a panic attack… alone… in the middle of the street… I wanted to have found you, but I couldn't even find your apartment… I thought I would die that day… and I could only think that no one else in the world would understand the situation like you… but the Widows found me first… and the rest is history." I said even more quietly, feeling my eyes burn.

"Holy shit. I'm sorry, Yelena. I’d have taken you in. No doubt… I really would have helped you in any way I could… when did you tell her this?" She asked, looking at the stove before going over to turn off the boiling soup. "Let me have this first… I don't really feel well." She said, pouring some soup into a mug and taking hard sips of the hot drink.

"Just take it slow…" I sighed, and she completely ignored me, still drinking the soup. She finished quickly, and I sighed, seeing her massage her temples hard. She will get better now. The secondary mission was accomplished.

She returned to sit next to me quietly, and I sighed, looking around the apartment, at the beautiful ceiling… at the huge windows… the city lights outside were elements that almost made me relax… "Now, I can continue this conversation… tell me, Yelena, how long did it take you to seek Marie's help?" she whispered, and I leaned back on my hands, thinking about how to continue this conversation.

"Maybe about six months after everything…" I said, feeling a small tear well up in my eye. "Seeking help wasn't easy." I quickly wiped my face, refusing to cry before saying everything.

"And why did you never look for us? Clint and I would have dropped everything to help you." She said, looking directly at me.

"I don't know… I think I was too ashamed to look for you and scared of how I'd feel around Clint… I'm afraid of breaking down again like I did that day… even now… even knowing I'm better… I'm still afraid of losing control like that day…" I shrugged, and she snorted, going to the fridge.

"As I said… Both Hawkeyes would have taken you in… it's kind of our thing to take care of hurt Widows…" She said softly. "But as I promised yesterday… I won't interfere in your business with Clint, sorry for using that today. I'm mad about your lie and wanted to hurt you, but my part is independent of his." She said, taking her perfect hair out of the small tie that held it, making me once again carefully observe how beautiful she looked with this new style.

I was mesmerized by the whole image of the woman saying everything she probably needed to say. I don't know if I blinked or even breathed.

"Shit… I wish I could open up like that at some point…" I muttered, feeling drained, and she sighed.

"It takes time to be a good annoying chatty." She said, winking. "Now… your soup is delicious… but I think we need alcohol… Maybe the alcohol will help you while the therapy doesn’t 'kick in' … Have you ever heard that a good hangover is cured with more alcohol? I'll help us out. I'll get us alcohol, and you'll keep talking." She said, rummaging through the freezer to come back with a bottle of vodka. My favorite vodka.

She handed me a glass, sitting next to me at the counter, looking as interested in the city lights as I was. Like yesterday, I felt all the world's tension diminish, replaced by the ease of being beside her.

"I like this view… it's so quiet here…" I sighed my words, relaxed. "And this vodka… it's my favorite… it was Nat's favorite too…" I tried to smile, looking into the bottom of the glass, certain that my sister would definitely have liked Kate Bishop.

"That's here for when Clint comes over… he loves it. Maybe it was a thing between them two, I guess… and I'll probably have to buy more…" She said softly, and I chuckled, sure of how complicated that would be.

"Good luck on your trip to Russia… don't forget your gloves…" I teased, and she looked at me completely shocked.

"What?" she asked, beginning to understand.

Rich people, thinking everything has a price.

"This vodka isn't sold just anywhere… only one place in Russia sells this… and they don't do deliveries… they don't even sell to just anyone…" I said, laughing, sipping the wonderful drink, and she groaned loudly, reaching for the bottle to check the quantity.

"Damn it… but… it's worth it… drink all you can, Petit Widow… I'll buy more of this shit at some point…” She said in perfect French, making my ears heat up. I looked at her perfect face watching her keeping talking. “Maybe Clint will forgive me when he finds out it was drunk on a date with you…" She said, smiling confidently as I felt myself blush for much more than a vodka with a 70% alcohol content. The affectionate way she referred to me and the word ‘date’ almost made me want to jump into her lap.

Fortunately, she didn't see my struggle because she now seemed very concerned, holding the bottom of her loose pants while still trying to read the information on the bottle.

"Okay, I can't read this crap… and you… keep talking…" She said, propping her elbows on her knees, wincing audibly with another sip of the too-strong vodka straight from the bottle.

I smiled bitterly, feeling my cheeks burn from the show the woman was putting on. She probably doesn't even know what she's doing to me with that tough-girl act. "Look how things change… are you the one interrogating me today?" I joked just to see her snarl and give me an answer that chilled my blood.

"You can always leave the conversation, Yelena… I'm not forcing you to stay, and I have no interest in making you uncomfortable… but don't be mistaken… no one will ever make me uncomfortable in my house like you did once." She pointed out seriously.

Ouch.

I almost couldn't find a response. "Oh my God, Kate… where's your sense of humor, girl?" I tried to smile.

"It jumped out the window with you that day… disappeared being hunted by Fisk… died completely having to prove myself to disrespectful idiots like Eli…" she smiled bitterly.

I paled at her words. My smile died completely. Okay, nothing is funny anymore in this situation. There was a message I hadn't realized until now. Kate Bishop suffered and suffered much more than she let on. I needed her to know I was here to listen to her too.

"I know we're not friends… and you can deny it if you want… but if I'm telling you everything… I also want to know more about you… I also want to be available for important conversations… How was this time for you, Kate? " I said, reaching for her hand, afraid she wouldn't want my touch, but she didn't resist.

"Oh… I have no problem talking about that… not anymore… but yes, it was all crap… first, I had no money… even for basic things… and then I was scared because those idiots kept hunting me… Clint came here again and sorted everything out for me… scared off the idiots… helped me sort out the company stuff… but basically, getting my money back changed everything… I went back to studying… I started my training at the complex… met the kids… graduated… and I changed a lot… I had to change… that kind of thing changes your mind… there was no room to be the crazy girl I was before… I had to deal with a lot of responsibilities…" she sighed, taking a hard sip of the vodka and coughing loudly.

"Drink slower, please… And tell me something… all the changes… suffering… was it worth it?" I asked, touching each of her fingers.

"I don't know… but it kept me alive… my mind is still a mess… but now I have a focus… My mom always warned me… she used to say I didn't really understand the weight of someone always having to clean up my mess… and it all makes sense now… she doesn't talk to me, and I understand… in many ways, she got into this life to maintain my standard of living… she said I'm like my dad… never knew what hardship was… now I know… I learned the hard way… and I deal with all the difficulties with maturity, with coldness… without hesitation…" She whispered, and I thought it was really bad… but I didn't imagine how much.

"I'm so sorry, Kate… I really relate to all of this… It's like when I came out of mind control… it felt like I had to learn everything… I was so confused and overwhelmed… I didn't know how to recognize right from wrong, you know… that mess, thinking now… I wouldn't be deceived today… but I was back then because despite everything I went through… despite everything, I was still innocent… The therapist said I maintained my innocence despite a lifetime of crap… Can you believe that shit?" I laughed, looking for her gaze, thinking she would be smiling, but she wasn't. I touched the hair on her nape, encouraging her to continue talking. The softness of my touch served to calm us both.

"While you didn't lose yours… I think I lost mine… and it was awful… understanding how the world really worked without anyone close to teach me, hurt… even with Clint's support, it was the hardest thing I've ever had to do in life… Remember what I said about collateral damage? My collateral damage might have been kind of losing my soul…" She gasped, wiping her nose from the start of a painful cry. I held her even more gently by the back of her neck and hair. I wanted to cry at her words and I cried.

"Okay… I understand that… but you're wrong... you owe the kindest soul I've ever met… It's all still there... I saw it yesterday and I'm seeing it now... I promise…” I said, wiping away her painfully shy tears. 

I cleared my own tears deciding I was on the right path when I saw the shadow of the same look from yesterday. I now want so much more and I'm going to start asking for it. 

“Kate… you know, it would've been nice if I had managed to come back sooner… if I had reached you that day… I'm sure we could've supported each other a lot… we would've been good friends… Do you have many friends?" I probed curiously, and she laughed.

"They all left when that thing happened with my mom… among rich people, it's like that… you're only worth what you have… my friends now are those kids… Clint and his family… Sam…" She said, smiling, seeming happy with that. 

Okay... also… she didn't mention any girl…

"And… the part of… fun… people… I mean… romance?" I stammered, and she laughed out loud.

"Romance? Please, Yelena… that's nonsense… there's no room for anything like that in this life." She scoffed, fanning the air in disbelief, and I huffed feeling my mood change with her dismissive tone.

She talked like that but hung out with guys like that idiot.

"No? Then why did you sleep with that idiot boy?" I growled feeling the childish tone in me.

"Because I was an idiot before… it was easy… we had a lot of tension at first, fighting for group leadership… big dick energy and stuff… one night, there was alcohol… I was excited, and it happened once… I regretted it the moment he got out of me… but none of that is classified as romance in anyone's book…" She was being very blunt and technical while I gritted my teeth.

"It's insane to imagine you… with… that…" My disgust with the situation was visible because yes… The woman looks like a Goddess… a modern princess… All beautiful… intelligent… kind… and that disrespectful sack of shit doesn't seem to know how to take a shower. "I-I- don't understand…" I finished, annoyed, drinking my vodka in one gulp.

"Slow down too… you don't need to get jealous…" She laughed, bumping her shoulder into mine, too amused for my liking.

"I'm not jealous!" I shouted, offended. "There's no comparison… look at me and look at him, Kate… not even… argh…" I said, getting off the counter to go to the windows again.

"I am truly looking at you, Yelena…" She said, stopping beside me to see the same lights I was looking at. I crossed my arms, suspicious. I don't really feel that seen by her… if anything, she's been tough on everything about me approaching her. Her gaze on me has been suspicious 80% of the time we've known each other.

"I don't feel seen by you… you seem to distrust everything about me… and I know part of that is my fault… I know I threatened you before and yesterday I lied… I should have said I came here to understand if I wanted to get into this shit life… I wanted your perspective on it… I wanted to calm down… I wanted to scout… I was wrong in that… sorry… but I didn't lie about wanting to really make that a good moment… to reconnect with you… to talk to you… to give you a good date… even in the disastrous mac and cheese, I still tried… didn't I?" I said, feeling nervous about the simple possibility of her not understanding and not seeing what I saw in her all this time.

She remained silent, looking at the city, much more thoughtful, and I could only straighten up, taking her front, leaning against the window to get her attention.

"Did you feel how different it was yesterday? Did you feel how good it was?" I said, mustering up the courage to seek her face. She finally gave me her gaze and seemed to be trying to understand. I let my hands touch the soft hair on her nape while waiting for her.

She closed her eyes when I intensified my caress, letting my fists close in the perfect hair that seemed to have enchanted me. The warm skin on her neck seemed goosebumped, and I got even closer, letting my forehead rest on her shoulder. The texture of her skin hadn't left my thoughts since yesterday.

"God, Kate… I really like what you did with your hair… you're beautiful anyway… but this cut really has kept me attentive to everything about you since the second I saw you yesterday… And your skin here is softer than any other… I've never touched anyone like I want to touch you…" I practically purred in her neck, hanging completely on her shoulders at the sound of her low moan.

"Do you feel this?" I needed to know, but she didn't respond, only buried her face in my neck. She was close to me… inhaling my skin… I moaned loudly, feeling her hands hold my waist, then move to my back… my nape… my hair… and I found myself sighing… melting… relaxing… nothing ever felt so safe…

"I like your touch…" I whimpered, feeling her lips on my pulse, in a touch too tempting for me not to press my whole body against hers. I wished I could meld my skin with hers right now.

"Yes? I didn't imagine you would behave like this… you barely know me…" She whispered, now letting her tongue explore my skin, drawing a loud plea for more.

"I can't explain what happened the day you didn't shoot me… and frankly, I don't expect to understand… but you… reached me in a permanent way that day… I think I wanted to feel that again all this time…" I said, pulling her even closer amidst my pleas.

"I think I understand… How does touch work for you, Yelena? I thought it would be difficult… I never expected someone… with your experiences… to be so… tactile…" Her warm hands on my skin, now under my shirt, felt like the only right thing in my world, but I understood her doubts.

"I don't particularly like being touched… it's not something—" My words made her let go of me immediately, taking a step back, and I whimpered sadly, but I didn't seek the contact again. My back met the cold glass behind me, serving as some consolation for the rejection.

She probably doesn't need my touch or my complications.

"Sorry… I didn't know… I thought it would be difficult… but I didn't imagine… and I… damn… I'm sorry for touching and kissing you without asking first…" She growled, nervously messing up her hair, and I moaned, upset.

"If you don't want to touch me, I understand… but don't apologize…" It was humiliating to realize that this was much more complicated than I had imagined. My eyes hurt from holding back tears, but I contained myself, closing my eyes until tiny stars appeared…

"Yelena… look at me…" I felt her voice much closer and obeyed, seeing how she had her arms supported on the window, still an obvious gesture not to touch me.

"It's okay, Kate… I know it's not that simple and that you've changed… I myself have changed… and I know I'm a different person from the ones you knew… I know you're angry with me and I should have told the truth yesterday to have a better chance… and that was my plan… I swear… but seeing you all closed off at the bar made me… I got scared…" I apologized again, now much more upset. I rubbed my eyes impatiently, and she sighed.

"Hey, stop… it's not all about that… just breathe… you don't need to be nervous… I'm just trying to understand where all this comes from… to know your limits… because I want to touch you…" She said, letting her hand gently hold my chin. My lips touched her palm unconsciously.

"Keep explaining to me… I want to hear you…" I whispered, now holding her hand against me.

"I just… God… look, the lie annoyed me… but I think… hurts more to think that you had other intentions than actually taking me on a date… it bothers me more… not being sure if you're interested in me… it bothers me not to identify your real intentions in this…" She pointed from me to her, her eyes red from uncried tears and her rapid breathing indicating her discomfort… Everything seemed painful for her. This was about trust.

When I met her… I warned her about the danger of blind trust… she listened to me… and now she was applying it painfully in all aspects of her life. I need to fix this.

"I understand your distrust… on our first encounter… I threatened you to make you understand how blind trust was a mistake… you learned that… but I want to show you that you can trust me… I wanted this… I told you yesterday… I have no bad intentions… I just want… I spent the whole night trying to place us in little promises of new dates… and I was foolish… and I touched you… I let you touch me… I'm not uncomfortable with you… can you see what your touch does to me?" My whispers made her touch my face gently, her thumbs were nothing but subtle on my lips…

"Like this? Are you okay with me touching you like this?" The whispered words made me pull her by the waist towards me. Her forehead against mine told me I could ask for much more.

"I am more than okay with your touch… only yours… and I want more, Kate… much more…" I whispered, feeling her heart racing directly against my chest.

"I-I-I… I want to kiss you… can I?" She pleaded softly, her lips touching my face, and I moaned, seeking her cheeks with my hands.

"I want it… I allow it… I need it…" I said, closing the distance to experience the softest, gentlest lips I had ever touched.

The touch on my neck… nape… hair… while she kissed me with relaxed lips made me tremble completely, her warm tongue grazing my mouth was just enough to make us moan. I got even closer, bringing her body entirely to mine. "I wanted this yesterday… and I'll want much more…" I whispered, making her moan loudly, lifting my body to hold us against the window.

"I was an idiot yesterday… sorry for offering the window…" She said, now letting her eager kisses take over my neck again.

"It's okay… if I had come up yesterday… we wouldn't be here now… you would feel used and betrayed by my lie…" I moaned between my words, feeling her kisses intensify. I held the hair at her nape with much more abandon, and she moaned, rubbing against me before biting me completely.

"God… your therapist is doing an incredible job… thank God you didn't come up then…" She whispered, kissing my shoulders slowly. "Is it okay to bite you here?" She said, biting my shoulder, and I sighed, surrendered.

"Your touch doesn't bother me… stop asking me… I want everything… touch me however you want… take everything you want from me… I'll give you everything… I just want you…" I pleaded, and she sought my mouth again with much more hunger.

Her hands now touched my arms… my thighs around her waist were my only support… I pressed even closer to her, feeling my body pulsate completely for her. I wanted to ask for more… beg for her, but I didn't need to. She seemed to be reading my mind by touching everything… I felt delirious as she pushed us hard against the window… It took me minutes to understand that I was asking for each touch I was receiving.

"I need more…" She growled, causing me to release my legs before she began rubbing against me for a full minute and then released me as if I was burning her.

"Don't you dare stop… keep going…" I moaned, pushing us slowly through the entire apartment.

"I don't want to stop… but I also don't want to rush any of this… c'mon… I want to lie with you for a few minutes… I need to breathe…" She gasped, making us lie down in the same spot she had been before, amid many cushions.

I breathed, understanding, and found space on her chest, still light-headed from the kisses, and she chuckled softly.

"That was… I can't… I should be angry with you… but your skin… and that wicked hair…" She grumbled, closing her fists in my hair, and I invaded her space for another kiss.

"Stop being mad at me, woman… I don't want war… I want you… Me and my wicked hair are at your service." I laughed, gently biting her lips.

"I'm probably dreaming all of this…" She laughed, pulling me completely onto her, and I didn't deny it.

"Did we drink too much yesterday? Maybe the expensive vodka…" She laughed loudly, and I understood that teasing was definitely our thing.

"I don't know… I hope not… because I want to do more of this… maybe with fewer clothes…" She whispered in my ear, and I shivered, rubbing against her. "Do you want this? Do you want more than what we're doing? I can give you so much more…" The little bites between her words made me whimper completely.

Her hands now on the lower part of my back and thighs made me quicken my movements. I was in another dimension feeling her wet mouth on my neck. She sucked and bit the skin while pulling me even closer to her.

I held onto her hair, which I now knew was causing all this hunger in me, as I sought something I didn't really know at this intensity. No one had ever made me feel like I might die if I didn't seek this relief.

"I wished I had done this yesterday… I imagined all the ways I could have you…" She growled, following my movements.

"Hold me tighter… I'm close… please…" I pleaded, and she lifted to embrace me better.

"I won't let go of you… do as you want… show me how you need it…" She said, helping me move my hips, and I moaned loudly, pulling her face to mine. Our kiss didn't follow the hunger of my body. I sped up my movements, leaving my mouth delicately glued to hers, knowing this wouldn't take long.

Our moans filled the room, and she now seemed beside herself as she lifted my shirt to see my breasts. I laughed, taking off my shirt, and she groaned, looking from me to them.

"I want… can I?" She whimpered, continuing her respectful display despite us rubbing against each other like two teenagers.

"Yes… we can have everything… Can I too?" She nodded hard, and I gasped, already pulling off her shirt, bringing my hands to her perfect breasts.

She screamed loudly, hurrying her movements, as I lowered my mouth to kiss where my hands had been. I lightly bit the soft skin, and she clenched her fists in my hair, much more lost.

Both of us needed more…

I quickly let go of her to kneel in front of her and pull my pants down my legs. She laughed, following my example, pulling everything off much faster than I did.

"Yelena… I promise that later today I'll show you everything about making love slow and gentle… but for now…" She delicately removed my panties and brought me to fit my body into hers. Our wet, warm flesh slid perfectly, and I screamed, seeking more contact. She dragged us until she had support on the couch, and I held onto the table behind me completely lost in how the friction was the only right thing now.

"This feels so good… I've never… damn… can you… touch me?" I begged, lifting slightly to seek her hand to touch me…

"You're perfect, Yelena… and your skin is so…" She said, letting one of her hands touch my breasts gently.

"Exactly like that… please…" I begged as I felt being teased by a persistent finger where I needed it most.

I started dancing in her lap again, losing myself in her neck. And now it didn't take long… She hugged me tightly, moaning abandoned, leading us to what I will forever consider the safest place in the world. I collapsed on her shoulder, hearing all the moans of our own madness.

When I managed to breathe, she sought my face for a thirsty kiss. God… I could hardly think… everything in me was shaking, while I lay down back on the cushions, in a state of almost shock when I looked at her, who seemed as surprised as I was.

We both laughed out loud looking at each other, like two stupid teenagers. 

"Are you okay?" She grumbled loudly, rubbing her face, and I growled as best I could with my laughter.

"What do you think?" I moaned, and she came to me excited.

"I hope I did so well that you want to repeat this a lot… and I warn you in advance… none of the fugitive shit with me… Clint told me all about it… run away from me and you won't have to bother coming back…" She said in the tone I learned to recognize yesterday and today.

This angry and moody thing really suits her… but I don't want any of that.

I looked at the ceiling and then into her beautiful eyes… her whole perfect face framed by perfectly wild hair. She was giving me her terms, and I understood… she's accepting something I asked for myself… I need to fulfill my end of the deal. 

“While we just did something very common in your world… this is not so common for me…” I said still breathing deeply and she smiled touching my face with her shaking hand.

I leaned comfortably on my elbow to support my head as I touched the skin on her abdomen.  She's even more stunning naked.  I wanted to organize my thoughts to explain to her what I expect from everything we are doing.

“I completely understand what you mean… I totally get it… I just wanted you to know first of all that even though we did this quickly and crazily… I'm not kidding and I won't admit to being used on any scale by someone who will just climb out my window and leave out of fear.”  She said, still in an angry and bossy tone.

"Okay… Thank you for that… but… Now that I finally have your attention... I’d like to kindly ask you to tone it down with me... it's always good to remember that I don't really have everything organized and I don't have that much patience either... If I'm being flexible it's because I want to… but don’t confuse my kindness with you having carte blanche to mistreat me… Don't forget that we now work in the same office… I gave my word and I will keep it… I don't want anything too complicated, Kate… I don't want to run away anymore… I just want to live a good life… a full life… and maybe that could be with you…" I said, fixing her hair, and she smiled.

"Wow again… Good Job Marie … This sounds like a good deal… let's take it slow… I'm just angry, this will pass soon, I'm sorry I was harsh… Everything's been hard and you haven't exactly helped yourself through it… Let's just… maybe our plan from yesterday… to have many dates… and today's plan, of course… lots of activities without clothes, maybe I just needed to cum… and then maybe you can turn me into a good girl again…" She said with her scoundrel ways, touching my shoulders, and I laughed out loud.

"Have you always been this scoundrel? You're so gross... I love it…” I said, making both of us laugh.

“But now, seriously, none of this needs to be complicated. I want whatever you want… But I really want to get to know you slowly… Just… I don't know how to do everything but I want to try." I admitted honestly, feeling vulnerable under her gaze now much more penetrating than all night. "I never imagined a simple offer of a drink in the midst of a fight could lead to this." I pointed between the two of us.

She leaned in closer, her lips curving into a subtle smile. "Sometimes, surprises are the best parts of life," She murmured, her voice almost a whisper. "I also want whatever you want, Yelena…" She said, reaching for my hand to touch her cheek. The gentle touch of her lips on my palm made me draw closer to her.

She pulled back, adjusting her hair while still looking at me with her now large eyes. I waited, and when she finally spoke, her eyes were shining with an intensity that made my heart race even more. "Yelena, what do you really want to do now? Is the whole hero thing really what you want?" She asked, her voice low and husky, now without the remnants of earlier nervousness or laughter.

"I'm not entirely sure… this group was brought together for a purpose that has been fulfilled… I managed to rid myself of those who deceived me against Barton… and you know I'm not really sold on sacrifice and all that comes with it… but I think what you told me that day about doing the right thing… I think I understand that sometimes we need to do the right thing even if it seems wrong… And if I can stay close to you while doing that… it'll be good for me… I'm just sure now that I want to continue with this right here…" I said, touching the space above her heart. "Do you want that too?" I whispered happily.

She took a deep breath, seeming to gather courage. "I want to continue with this, and I'll help you with whatever you need in our work… It doesn't have to be hard, and if it is… I'll be there for you as you want me." She said, her voice trembling slightly. "But as far as us… I do want to see where this leads us… even though I have no idea how to deal with you… I… shit… just tell me to shut up anytime… I just want you to be comfortable…" She rambled freely, and I sighed happily, now much more relieved to see the old crazy Kate appear.

"God… finally… now it really feels like the Kate Bishop I knew is back…" I smiled, and she looked at me confused.

"What do you mean?" She asked, touching my nape, making me purr with joy before responding.

"When I called you… you seemed standoffish… and then at the bar you seemed almost too tough… and you… I know people mature… but maybe I was looking for something I saw in those days… the fair girl who defended her mentor… or the annoying one who talks nonsense… the impulsive who jumped off a building after me…" I said softly, and a light bulb seemed to go off in her head.

"I hadn't realized that… it makes sense… as I told you, I really was so stuck in myself in the last two years… I had to mature the hard way… and the price I paid was becoming this boring adult, full of responsibilities… At some point, I stopped living a regular life… stopped having fun… stopped talking nonsense so people would take me seriously and I succeeded… but I missed being myself…" She rambled again and then spent many thoughtful minutes.

"What are you thinking about?" I said, running my hand through her hair, letting my fingers run through the roots completely, and she smiled.

"I just remembered how much I missed being ordinary…" She said quietly, and I smiled relieved that it wasn't anything too big.

"Hey… You're not ordinary… I've been keeping track of everything you've done in the last two years… and what you told me today… just gave me the certainty that you've done nothing but be strong… and be what… it seems like you've always been this damn hero… you're like my sister… born for this…" I said playfully, she growled biting my arm in a playful affection and I lay completely on her again.

"I know you think it's shitty that I'm an Avenger… don't lie…" She said, pushing my head off her shoulder.

"Well… yes… but maybe I'll have to get used to it…" I said looking into her perfectly relaxed eyes.

"If you're trying to say you'll take me on more forced dates… I'll sacrifice myself…" She said nonchalantly and I moaned biting her chest.

"Don't talk like that… it was fun… admit it…" I whined completely hearing her laugh.

"I do admit… it was the best date I've ever had…" She said looking at me, seeming happy to be here with me and that was worth all the drama.

"Alright… okay, now… where did we leave off?" She said turning my body to see me.

"I don't know… continue without clothes… talk more nonsense? Which part exactly are you talking about?" I played dumb kissing some beautiful nipples and she roared loudly taking it out of paradise by my hair.

"I'm talking about that part where you were going to fry all my neurons that the weed I used in college didn't lead me to." She said touching the hair of my neck and I snorted.

"I can't believe you used that shit…" I said getting up to look into her eyes and she waved guilty bringing my forehead to hers in a gentle gesture that made me sigh contentedly.

"I am now an honest Avenger, Yelena… no more mess for me… Clint said when a Hawkeye meets their Widow everything changes." She said experimenting with my lips gently, leaving her fingers to touch my hair that I know now, did her complete number on her.

Maybe we really should really keep these cuts.

"Alright, shitty Hawkeye Avenger… Whatever… now take care of your Widow." I moaned in her mouth, deciding that now everything was in its proper place for the first time.