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Chapter Text

 Getting Revenge

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I never knew my life could change so drastically because of one man. A man who changed my life...for the worst. I have hated Jack for years for what he did, and still, I have not had the privilege of putting a bullet through his heart. Every day I wished to find him and teach him the lesson he had earned to put himself in the grave. I anticipated the day when the last thing he would see would be his own blood-saturated shirt and me smiling as he slowly fades into darkness...into his miserable and gruesome death.

The year was 1872, located in Washington D.C., U.S.A. Jack Tanton was a low-life piece of scum who was the sheriff of our town. However he came to own that title was beyond me. He seemed to be a respected man around these parts. Everyone seemed to like him; everyone but me. I always thought there was something off about him. It seemed I was right.

The way he looked at my Mama whenever he would see her did not sit well with me. There was lust in his eyes. He would watch her in church services, while she walked through town, while she went to buy bread...you name it; he was there. It seemed that for a long time I was the only one who noticed it. I mentioned it to Pa one day and he shrugged it off, saying, “He is just looking out for everyone and making sure they stay safe.”

Over time I could see Pa keeping an eye on Jack. What I said to him became more and more apparent over time. The way Jack became bolder and started talking with Mama more and more. I could see worry growing on Pa's face. He eventually warned her to stay away from Jack. By that time, she could tell that something was wrong with the whole situation. The way Jack talked to her became more intense and occurred more often. She even reminded Jack she was a married woman.

I still remember that day when Jack came to my house. Pa had been out that day. I had been playing with my doll Lucy just before asking Mama to play hide and seek with me. She agreed. I went to hide and waited for her to come and find me, as I lay hidden under her bed. Suddenly there was a knock at the door and she went to answer it.

“Jack, what brings you here?” Mama asked in surprise as he stood at the door. “Oh, hush now. I think we both know the answer to that question,” he said huskily, with a stupid sly grin on his face. She stood there in silence. “I noticed your husband has stepped out. Where is your daughter?”

She hesitated for an answer, then chose to remain silent for a short moment. “Matthew will be back shortly. What do you want?” She finally uttered. A disgusting and menacing smile slowly crossed Jack's face. “I do not think we really need to play these games, do we Margaret Cartwell?” Jack asked. She shut her mouth, surprised by his blunt remark. He slowly advanced toward my mother.

She backed away as he came closer to her. I was helpless laying under the bed. What was I to do? I remained a coward and silently started tearing as I watched him advance towards her. I held Lucy tight for comfort as he pulled Mama close to him. She struggled to become free but it was no use; he had a strong grip on her.

Jack tried to kiss my mother. She resisted. I suddenly heard the sound of the front door opening. Pa was home! I was relieved to know that he would stop Jack from harming Mama, or so I thought. When Pa saw what was happening, he spoke up.

“What are you doing?” Pa asked, confronting Jack. Jack was startled to find Pa home so early. An angry expression crossed Jack's face as he released his grip from my mother. He quickly reached for his gun to shoot my father! Pa quickly reacted and stopped Jack's hand from pointing at him.

They struggled with the gun and shuffled around. A moment later the gun went off...BANG! There was a ringing in my ears from the loud gunshot. The sound of the gun had frightened me and I realized I was closing my eyes tightly. I snapped back into reality when my father let out a loud moan. My eyes were open at that point and I heard my father call out in agony, “Noo!”

My eyes quickly darted over to the right to find my father's face in torment. He fell to the ground on his knees. Where was the blood? My eyes searched again. There was nothing. It was then that I realized he was looking out in front of him at my mother.

I quickly looked to my left and found my mother falling on her side to the ground. My father called out again as we both watched her hit the ground with a thud. “Nooo!” As he went to get up to head toward her, he noticed Jack step up close to him from his right side. Pa froze and looked over to find Jack pointing a pistol toward him. “Look what you made me do!” Jack raged. Fear swept over Pa's face as Jack cocked his gun. I looked away and closed my eyes as Jack pulled the trigger. BANG!

Chapter Text

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

The day that Jack came to my house was the day that Jack went too far. I was only nine when my Mama died...when Jack left her and my father both to die. I could feel my face harden as I thought of Jack and what he had done to my family. Now, fifteen years later, I was on a mission to find Jack, and kill him. He was still wanted for murder, and he had a high price on his head. He was wanted, dead or alive, with a bounty of $5000 for anyone who captured him.

It seemed what happened with my parents years ago had escaped the minds of those around me. It seemed I was the only one out to stop Jack now-a-days. Well, no matter; I was going to find him sooner or later. I had heard he was last seen in a town not too close to my home. Whether the source was reliable would soon be evident. So, I had packed my things and headed out of town to find him.

I rode into a distant town on horseback. I tied up my horse and walked into the town's saloon for a drink. All eyes in the saloon suddenly turned toward me. I started to walk slower as I became uneasy with all the people staring at me as I walked toward the bar. The bartender, a ghoul of a man, probably not over the day of forty, stood in front of me as I walked up to him to order a drink. He had the skin of someone who was decaying. Despite his horrible appearance, he had patches of brown hair and friendly, soft bright blue eyes.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

When a young woman walked right into the saloon, all eyes were on her. I knew why too. Not only was she new in town, she was a beautiful sight to behold. She seemed to be alone. I reckoned I needed to be acquainted with this lone wanderer before any other of the single men got to her first. To them, she was like prey just waiting to be ensnared. I watched her as she made her way toward the bar.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I went to tell the bartender my order when a masculine voice came from beside me. “I have never seen you here before. You must be new in town.” I looked over to my right to find a rather handsome, well-dressed man in a light striped suit and dark striped tie standing next to me near the bar. He wore a charcoal-brown trilby and had light skin, with short, dark stubble growing in on his face, very short brown hair, greyish-blue eyes, thin lips, and a look on his face that said, I want you. I looked away from him and replied, “Yeah.”

I did not want anyone thinking I was here to amuse their masculine fantasies. I was strictly here to find Jack; not to associate with people. The bartender then came over to me. “What will it be 'smoothskin'?” The bartender asked me in a very raspy voice. “A whisky; on the rocks.” “A whisky? Are you sure you can handle it?” The well-dressed man to my right asked me. “When you have had a hard life, the bottle becomes your friend,” I replied without looking at him.

He and the bartender made eye contact at my comment. The bartender then went to fill my order after a short moment. “I can take a hint,” the man to my right said. Then he left me alone, walked to my right over to a chair and table in the corner. I sat down on the bar stool and went to get out my money to pay for my drink. I noticed the man who had previously been standing to my right, was watching me from his chair several feet away.

I looked away from him and placed the money down in front of me on the bar, just as the bartender came back with my drink. He set the drink down in front of me. When he noticed the money he shook his head. “Is it not enough? I have more,” I mentioned. “No. That is not it. The drink has already been paid for,” he said.

I was confused. “But I have not paid...” I started to say, but stopped mid-sentence. He stood there from behind the bar facing me, but looking to his left. He then looked back at me. I did not understand him. He did it again, then returned his gaze to me.

I looked in the direction he had been looking to my right and followed his gaze as he did it once more. My eyes found the man in the corner who was now sitting in the chair. I realized now that the bartender was trying to tell me that the man who had walked over to the chair had offered, somehow, to pay for my drink on his tab. “Thank you,” I told the bartender with a subtle smile. I grabbed my drink, got off my bar stool, and headed over to the man sitting in the chair.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

I went up to talk with the beautiful woman who had just walked in. She did not seem to want to engage in conversation. By her reaction of ignoring me, I knew she wanted to be left alone. I did not want to pester her; after all, she had just met me and I was a stranger to her. I had all but given up hope, but for a quick thought I had before walking away.

Gob, the bartender and I, made eye contact after her comment about the drink. Her intention was to dismiss me. If she wanted nothing to do with me, I would simply...persuade her to change her mind. While I had Gob engaged during our glance, I took the chance of signalling to him. I offered to buy her a drink by signalling secretly to the bartender to put her drink on my tab. Then I made my way to the chair to respect her and give her some space.

However, keeping my eyes off of her was a challenge. I knew I could not resist, so I watched her from my seat. My plan seemed to have worked. Gob hinted to her that I had offered to pay for her drink. She now understood. She grabbed her whisky, attractively slid down from the bar stool she was sitting on, and made her way over to me.

She was even more gorgeous up close. She had reddish-brown hair tied into a long braid that came down to the side of her right breast. She had piercing light green eyes and a beauty that could knock you down dead if you were not too careful. She wore a long-sleeved blue-grey tight outfit that came down past her hips, tight grey pants, and a charcoal-coloured bandana scarf that billowed around her neck. As she walked her hips swayed. My senses were intrigued.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

“All right, I will bite,” I said as I sat down next to the man sitting in the corner. The man gave a sly smile. “What is your name?” I asked him. “Mister Burke. Derek Burke,” he replied in an attractive, husky voice. “What made you decide to buy me a drink?” I asked him, curious of his intentions. “I wanted to be nice.”

“Yeah right. You had no other intentions?” “I wanted to get your attention.” “What for?” He hesitated to answer. Finally he spoke up. “I had to get you away from all the testosterone in here.”

“So you loured me over to you?” I wittily replied. He went to speak but was dumbfounded at my remark. He knew he had been caught. “I meant, away from the other testosterone in the room,” he said somewhat slowly as he smiled slyly. “I am Roselyn. Thank you for the drink.”

“You are not leaving are you?” He asked, looking concerned that I might leave. “Well, that depends...you are not trying to seduce me are you?” I replied. He smiled slyly and replied, “No.” “Then no.” He smiled in his sly way again. He seemed to enjoy my sense of humour. I took a drink of my whisky; as did he.

“What brings you into town?” He asked. “Business affairs. Let me just say, I have come to collect what is rightfully mine...,” I replied. He seemed intrigued by the whole idea. “You have not come across a Jack Tanton have you?” I asked.

“No. I know most people around here. If I meet him, I will be sure to send him your way. Where are you staying?” “To be honest, I am not sure. Is there a cheap place I can stay? Maybe a place hiring temporarily?”

“Well there are a couple of options. You can room with the town whore, become a lady of the night, or...board with me.” I smacked his face and stood up to walk out. The nerve of that man! I went to walk away and felt Mister Burke grab my upper arm quickly. People started to notice something was going on between Mister Burke and I. I did not care. He sat me down and let go of my arm. He sat down across from me again and I gave him the look he deserved; he had upset me.

“I apologize. I was only using humour. Do forgive me,” Mister Burke said. “Look, I have an extra room available at my place and I am willing to rent it out to the right person. I promise you will not be disappointed.”

I watched him with narrowed eyes. Something told me that he was lying and that he had not used humour at all. He was only saying that to cover his hide. However, I knew that I did not have much of a choice other than to board with him. After a moment, I nodded.

“Fine. Deal,” I said as I extended my hand to him. We shook hands. He casually finished his drink, then finally said, “I should go pay Gob before we leave.” He got up and went to the bartender. I finished my drink as he went to pay. He then came back after a very short moment.

I went to grab my horse, then followed Mister Burke to his house. To my surprise, it was larger than I had imagined it to be. I tied up my horse as Mister Burke waited for me. A sudden thought occurred to me as we approached the stairs to his front porch. “How do I know you are not going to try to seduce me as soon as I walk through that door?” I asked with my hand resting on my gun holster.

He noticed, smiled slyly, and looked back up to meet my gaze. He said, “If I try to seduce you, you have permission to shoot me.” “That seems fair,” I replied with my head cocked slightly to the side. He seemed amused. He gestured for me to walk ahead of him saying, “Ladies first.” I did not know this man as well as I should have. There was no way I was going to trust his word yet. I hesitated, then stated, “You go first.” A sly smile spread across his face.

Chapter Text

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

“Sorry, I am not much of a cook,” Mister Burke said, as he offered me my plate and sat down across from me at the dinner table. “How long are you planning on staying in town?” He asked. “Not too long. About a month or so if I can. It all depends...,” I said trailing off. I knew I did not have much money. In spite of this, I knew I needed to stay as long as possible to find Jack.

“Listen, to be honest I do not have a lot of money. Is there a place in town hiring temporarily?” He smiled, then said, “Unfortunately, no. Not unless being a whore sounds pleasing to you,” he said. I was surprised at his remark. He took one look at my reaction and went to correct himself, saying, “I simply meant that it would be the only work available at any time. But I can tell a sophisticated young woman as yourself would never do such a thing. My apologies.”

His apology seemed to be sincere. He then thought for a moment. “How about we make a deal; you can stay here for free, as long as you would like to, if you take care of the cleaning, cook meals, and take care of your horse of course.” “Throw in a small amount of spending money and I will even clean your clothes, polish your shoes, and shave your face,” I added. He chuckled huskily, then realized I was serious.

He looked at me in a puzzled way and tried to read my face. “Shave my face, hmm? Well, alright; you have a deal.” We shook on it. I then tried the meal he had placed before me. “This is not bad,” I said giving him a compliment on his cooking. He looked up from his plate and watched as I ate another bite of the meal he had cooked.

“I work during the day. I shall be back around five each afternoon. I hope to have supper on the table shortly after I arrive every day. Tomorrow I shall show you around town, if you wish,” he mentioned. “I would like that,” I replied. He seem pleased. He seemed a little too pleased. He then looked down at his plate and ate another bite of his food.

“Why is it that you have a spare bedroom?” I asked him. He looked up at me with a serious look upon his face. “Why have you not rented it out to someone already?” I added. “I recently had a roommate, but he got attacked by a notorious gang of raiders.” “Oh! How awful!” I exclaimed, horrified.

He smiled and said, “I am only pulling your leg. My best friend got married last year so he moved out. Since then, no one has been interested in renting the room. No one until now.” The way he said it sounded strange. Like there was more to it than what he was saying. I let the matter go.

I noticed he seemed pleased to have me around. I needed to make things clear to him. “I am only here on business. After my business affairs are dealt with, I will not be sticking around here any longer,” I stated. His smile faded. My comment seemed to displease him; it was apparently obvious by his silence. He seemed…let down, like he wanted something more. He looked down at his food and we ate in silence.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Later on, I cleaned up after supper. I wished Mister Burke a good night as I headed into my room alone for the night. As I lay in my bed, I could hear the floor boards creaking and new sounds I was not used to. It felt quite different to be in a stranger’s house. A male stranger who seemed to be attracted to me. I half expected him to come into my room and try to have his way with me while I slept.

I had my gun ready and fully loaded just in case he even so much as opened that door. I would have my gun cocked and aimed at him before he even set foot near me. Fortunately, however, he did not attempt to enter my room. It suited him better; not to have to kill him I mean. To have to shoot a handsome, well-dressed man like that would just be a waste. I was keeping my guard up none-the-less.

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In the morning, I awoke to smell something delicious floating in the air. I headed downstairs shortly after to find Mister Burke making breakfast. “I thought it was my job to make breakfast,” I said. He looked up at me and smiled. “Good morning. How did you sleep?” He asked. “Awful,” I replied. “Oh, and why is that?” He asked. I did not want to mention anything about having my gun ready for him just in case he walked into my room last night.

“It is a strange house. It is not exactly home. I will just have to get used to it,” I replied. “Well you can make yourself at home here. After all, you will be staying here for a while. I thought I would give you a day or two to get used to this place first before I ask you to do things around here,” he stated. It was very considerate of him. “Thank you,” I said gently.

There was an awkward silence afterward as he stood there looking at me. Was he trying to admire me? He finally spoke up and said, “Later on after supper I shall escort you outside and show you around town. It is not much, but it is home.’ We sat down to eat. Afterward, we both got ready for the day; he went off to work and I started cleaning up the kitchen.

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After work Mister Burke came home and we both ate supper. We then both headed outside and he showed me around town. He took me to see the shops, and the townsfolk. We ended up meeting up with Mister Burke’s best friend, Jonathan and his wife Charlotte. Jonathan had previously lived with Mister Burke until he became married to Charlotte. They were a lovely couple.

Later on, Mister Burke and I went to visit with Gob in the saloon. He was friendly, but seemed to be somewhat withdrawn. Mister Burke and I went to sit down to chat for a little while. “Do you come here often?” I asked him. “Usually almost every day after work,” he said.

I was just about to ask him what he worked for when I noticed a woman standing around on the opposite side of the bar. She was older than me. She kept looking my way and eventually I spotted her giving me a strange look. She had bright red hair. She wore ripped black tights with a short, skin tight grey-blue dress that revealed part of her bosom and bra. I quietly mentioned it to Mister Burke. “That woman over there keeps staring at me in a strange way. Who is she?”

He looked past me to see whom I was referring to. He then looked back at me and smiled mischievously. “That is Nova. You do not need to worry about her.” “Why does she keep staring at me so strangely?” I asked. “It looks like she is jealous of you,” he replied. I was confused.

“Why would she be jealous of me?” I asked. “She likes me you see. She has been trying to seduce me for a long time now, and I will not give into her…advances.” “She is jealous of me because I am sitting with you?” He nodded.

“She may be slightly older than me, but she is somewhat pretty in a way. Why have you never given into her?” I asked. He stayed silent for a moment, then said, “I was holding out for someone more my type.” He said. It almost seemed as though he was trying to read my reaction. He then added, “Besides, even if I liked her, I still would not give into her.”

“Why not?” I asked. “She is the town whore,” he stated. I was stunned at his remark. “Does she really have feelings for you, or is she after you for your...business?” I asked. “She has personal feelings for me. She knows that I am the one she will never have.”

He paused, then went on. “It is not like I have never thought about it. What man would not like to have a woman trying to get them into bed with them? I just do not want to be that man. When I lay with a woman, it should be because I love her, not because I am so desperate that I have to pay for it,” he said. He surprised me by his comment.

He continued. “To see you sitting here with me probably has her worried.” I looked back to find her occupied; flirting with a group of men sitting in the saloon. She then looked back over to Mr. Burke and I. She probably wished she could be flirting with him at the moment. It seemed to me like she was flirting with those men purposely, to make Mr. Burke jealous.

Nova wanted his attention. She pretended to act as if she had not noticed that I had seen the way she was looking at me. I was not going to let her get away with it either. I smiled to myself and Mr. Burke noticed. It seemed as though he was about to ask what I was smiling about when I started to pretend to flirt with him. He did not understand what was going on.

I looked back at Nova to find she had noticed I was touching his arm. I smiled to myself to know she was uncomfortable with my hand on his arm. She never noticed. I looked back toward Mr. Burke and said, “We should pay Gob and head out.” “Whatever for? We just arrived. We have not even finished our drinks yet,” he said.

I was going to tell him I wanted to leave because Nova kept staring at us and I was trying to make her jealous. I did not have the chance. “Hello Pan. You have not introduced me to your new friend here,” came a smooth female voice. I looked up to see Nova standing at our table. She was looking at Mr. Burke, then turned her focus to me. “Well hello to you too,” Mr. Burke said to her.

He looked at me and continued. “This is Roselyn. She is new in town.” “It is lovely to meet you. I am Nova,” she said to me. I was not here to make friends with whores. “Likewise,” I lied. I knew she was only here to check out what was going on between Mr. Burke and I. I was not in the mood for her nonsense.

“Do you mind if I sit down and join you both?” Nova asked Mr. Burke and I. He looked at me, then back to her. “Not at all,” he said. I quickly retaliated. “Yes, I mind. Pan and I were trying to have some time alone, if you do not mind.” I said it to sound polite, but I really meant it as a way of getting her to mind her own business and get the hint to back off.

This put Nova in an awkward situation. She would not be able to stay now, and if she did, it would be considered rude. I replaced my hand on Mr. Burke’s arm to make her even more uncomfortable. I got a satisfaction out of it knowing that it was working. “I am sorry to have disturbed you both. Maybe we can get to know each other soon,” she said.

“Thank you kindly,” I said sarcastically, trying to sound sincere. She slowly walked away, looking back to keep an eye on us. I gave her a good show as I pretended to flirt with him some more. I placed my hand on his thigh and started to rub it. I watched her as she left.

“She was getting on my nerves,” I told Mr. Burke with a hushed tone as I looked back at him. He was looking at my hand on his thigh. I removed my hand from his leg. I noticed he seemed to like it there. “Do not get too comfortable with my hands on you; it was only for show, so I could get her off our backs.” I noticed he went a slight shade of pink.

It was then that I realized he must have been lonely; he must be longing for a woman. For a short moment he looked deep into my eyes and I could see he was desperate for affection. His gaze was so intense I had to look away. “Have you ever been with a woman before?” I asked, looking back at him. He looked away from my gaze. “Once. It was very brief…” he said looking forward distantly. “What happened?” I asked.

He remained silent for a moment. It occurred to me that maybe he did not want to talk about it. I went to apologize for asking him something so personal, but he spoke up. “It was several years ago, late in the evening, when a bunch of us were gathered here in the saloon. We were sitting around drinking and telling each other old stories about past things that we regretted. When my turn came up, I foolishly blurted out that I had never had a decent woman in my life.” I had the feeling that he was implying that he had never been with a woman at all at that point in time.

“Well, there was a woman there that night who was sitting beside me. We had become decent friends. She, our friends, and I became drunk that night. Later on, our friends left the bar to go home for the night. She and I started talking and laughing together. I do not know if it was the whisky, or if it was my inner desire to lay with a woman, but I was foolish and I slept with her. I realized in the morning, when I woke up in her bed, that I had made a grievous error.”

He looked at me with a desperate look in his eyes. “That night I had too much to drink. The one time I drank too much…I stole her innocence away…I woke up beside her the next morning. I apologized to her. She wanted me to stay, but I had to get out of there. I tried to run away from my mistakes, but it has been no use. Sure, time has made things somewhat better, but the memories never go away,” he lamented.

He then continued after a short moment of thinking to himself in silence. “The night I slept with her, she loved it a bit too much. She always wanted it. She hounded me for it night after night, but I could not give into her needs. I did not feel the same way for her as she did for me. I did not want to be with her like that, and I did not want to use her. She eventually started turning to other men when she could not convince me to sleep with her again. Even now, she still tries to convince me to be with her. She knows it will never happen, and yet she persists.”

He turned to look my way. I realized he did not turn to look at me; he was looking past me. I turned to look at what he was gazing at. Nova had gone back to flirting with the men again. She smiled at a comment one of the men had said. She then looked over to me and her smile faded.

It was then that I realized who Mr. Burke had slept with. I looked back at him. “Wait! You slept with Nova?” I asked surprised. He looked up at me somewhat horrified. He really did regret sleeping with her. He never meant to hurt her. One thing had led to another it seemed. Every day he was reminded of his past. He was the influence of her becoming the whore she was today. Her sexual desires were never satisfied, and she went searching elsewhere when he would not sleep with her.

It seemed to me that he had held it in all this time; that he had never told anyone about what had happened between him and Nova. I had just arrived the day before, and already this man whom I barely knew had me feeling bad for him. Here I was in town to find Jack and kill him, and I was sitting here listening to Mr. Burke’s past regrets. I stood up and went over to Gob. I paid for Mr. Burke’s drink and mine. After all, not only did I feel bad for the guy, but he was allowing me to stay at his house for free…well, almost free.

I went back to find Mr. Burke with his head hanging low. I went up to him, and took his hand. “Let us go for a walk,” I told him. He looked at my hand holding his, then looked up at me for a moment. He stood up a moment later. Holding his hand, I lead the way outside. I could see Nova watching us as we walked out.

Seeing her stiffen as she watched us in jealousy was priceless. A smile formed on my face as we headed out of the saloon doors. Mr. Burke did not notice. “I had to get out of there. That woman was getting on my nerves,” I said letting go of his hand.

He seemed to prefer my hand in his; he was romantically starved. It seemed he was never able to let his past with her go. He blamed himself for the way she had become. He then avoided my gaze. He seemed melancholy; almost like I had rejected him. Then again, maybe it was not that way at all. Maybe he just wanted a listening ear.

“You have never told anyone…about what happened between you and Nova, have you?” I asked. He looked at me in a serious manner; his eyes still soft. “No, not until now. I wanted to tell someone…anyone; believe me. I had my reasons to keep my mouth shut. I believe Gob might have suspected something. He has never asked about it though. Even if he did find out, he has never been the one to gossip.”

Mr. Burke thought for a moment. “You are the only person I have told about this. Do not go spreading it around to others in town either. If I find out you have said something about any of this to someone else, there will be some choice words, and it will be the end of our agreement,” he said somewhat aggravated. When he saw I was not going to challenge him about it, he backed down and his eyed became soft again.

I looked deep into his eyes. I understood he was upset at himself, not at me. I explained to him, “Look, sleeping with Nova was a mistake, but now it is time to move on. She made her choices. It was her choice to become who she is today. Blaming yourself is only futile. You need to stop blaming yourself and let the past go. It is not your fault.”

He looked at me; almost in disbelief. His eyes searched mine. Maybe he just needed to hear it from someone else. If he had never told anyone about what had happened, he was never able to free himself from his emotional bondage. I could see it was only now dawning on him that he did not need to blame himself anymore. His eyes showed an appreciation for my help. Maybe even a bit more…

I looked away from him. I realize there was a part of town that he never bothered to show me. I quickly tried to change the subject. “You never showed me that part of town,” I said, facing toward the way I was speaking of. He looked where I was facing.

“There is not much important over that way,” he said with a strange tone. Something told me there was another reason why he avoided showing it to me, other than what he was saying to me. He then walked away slowly toward his house not too far from where we were standing. I noticed he kicked the ground gently. Something was on his mind.

I walked toward him and caught up to him. “Did I say something wrong?” I asked. He slowed down and said, “No. You did nothing wrong.” He walked up his steps silently and left me standing alone outside. Whatever it was that he was not telling me, I was going to try to find out what it was.

Chapter Text

~.~ Mr. Burke ~.~

I have never met a woman like Roselyn before. She does not care what others think about her. She does not wear dresses like the other women in town. Despite the fact that she is always dressed casually in appearance, she is absolutely gorgeous. She is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She is feisty, and I am drawn to her regardless.

She sat across from me as we ate supper together. Despite the fact that I was not the best cook, she did not seem to mind my cooking. I looked at her. I watched her eat. I could not help myself when I was around her. I could hardly take my eyes off of her.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I looked up to find Mr. Burke watching me. He quickly started eating again. I thought it quite odd. It looked as if he were admiring me. I kept my eyes on him for a moment and watched him stiffen. He was nervous. He avoided my gaze. He must have known I was watching him; that I had caught him watching me.

“How do you like the place so far?” He asked finally. He raised his eyes to mine. His eyes were attractive. “It seems like a nice town so far. Most people seem to be friendly around here,” I replied.

“Most people?” He inquired. “I am not too fond of Nova. She has no right to think she can control me. She came over to investigate what was going on between you and I. The nerve of that woman! I decided to give her a show by pretending to flirt with you. Maybe now she will leave you alone,” I said making my point, then looked down at my food and took another bite.

He chuckled an attractive, husky chuckle. “She is not all that bad once you get to know her. I think you would both get along well together if you gave her the chance,” he said. I scoffed under my breath. “No thank you,” I said, quickly dismissing the thought of becoming friends with her; a whore. His smile faded at my reply.

“I do not mean anything against you. I came here on business, and that is all. I wish to keep it that way,” I told him. He remained silent. I wondered if his silence had anything to do with what he had told me earlier, about how he had slept with Nova. Maybe he was simply dealing with his own problems. Or maybe he remained silent because I had set him straight on being here strictly for business.

Did he want more from me than he was letting on? I knew he was attracted to me. The way he watched me when he thought I did not notice gave it away. Did he really expect anything to change between us in such a short amount of time? I was here strictly to find Jack After that I was leaving; I was going back home.

There was no reason to stay here. No matter how much Mr. Burke was attracted to me. I would never be with him. Never. How could I? I have seen the way men treat women; the way things can turn out like…the way Jack handled my mama…

Tears started welling in my eyes. No. I will not cry. I will not cry! I blinked a few times and forced myself not to cry. I looked down so Mr. Burke would not notice the tears that had started to form in my eyes. Anger rose inside me as I thought of what Jack had done to my parents. The thought of Jack disgusted me. Men are pigs!

Although, my father treated mama really well. He loved her. He truly loved her. I wondered if I would ever love someone that way. If a man could ever love me that way…
I looked up at Mr. Burke. He looked at me with his handsome eyes. I could not take it. I had to leave. I thanked him for supper and quickly got up. I placed my dishes in the sink, looking downward, I closed my eyes and tried to contain myself.

Mr. Burke stood up behind me and asked, “Is everything alright?” I closed my eyes even tighter. I took a deep breath, sighed quietly to myself and raised my head to face forward; my eyes still closed. “I am heading to my room for the night. I shall clean up in the morning,” I said to him, opening my eyes as I remained facing forward toward the wall in front of me. I could not look at him. I had to leave. I started to walk towards the stairs. “Are you sure you are alright?” He asked again. I avoided the question and wished him a good night. I headed upstairs and shut the bedroom door behind me.

~.~ Mr. Burke ~.~

“I do not mean anything against you. I came here on business, and that is all. I wish to keep it that way,” Roselyn told me. I remained silent at her remark. I understood her point. Although I did not like the thought of her leaving. I am drawn to her like I have never been drawn to any woman before. Why am I so attracted to her? She has shown no interest in me whatsoever. I did not even know what type of business affairs she was here for in the first place.

I looked down towards my food and ate. Looking at her was only going to hinder me further if I could not be with her. There was no point in remaining hopeful on that point when there was none. She had made her point, and I knew she meant it. My new found affections for her would have to dissipate before I hurt myself with thoughts that would never happen. After her business affairs were finished, she was going to leave, and that was that.

I tried to concentrate on eating to get my mind off of things I could not control. Keeping my eyes off of her would certainly help in avoiding my affections for her, right? The less I looked at her, the less I would think of her. I kept my eyes focused upon my meal and concentrated on eating. I noticed after a couple moments that she had stopped eating her meal. I looked up at her. She thanked me for supper, quickly got up and placed her dishes in the sink. Something was off. Was there something wrong? I stood up out of respect for her and asked her if everything was alright.

After a moment she said, “I am heading to my room for the night. I shall clean up in the morning.” I thought it quite peculiar. Was she avoiding me because I had been admiring her, or even ignoring her several moments before? “Are you sure you are alright?” I asked her again. She did not answer. She simply wished me a good night, then headed upstairs and shut the bedroom door behind her. I did not understand it.

Somehow I thought I had wronged her in some way. Was she cross with me? I could not tell. One thing was for sure; she wanted to remain alone for the moment. I finished my dinner then cleaned up. I did not want her to have to worry about cleaning up the next morning. I did the dishes and headed up the stairs. I felt that I had somewhat wronged her. For what reason, I was not sure. I felt I needed to apologize to her.

I knocked on her bedroom door. There was no answer. I spoke up. “If I have wronged you in any way, I am sorry.” There still remained no reply. “I hope you have a pleasant night yourself,” I added. Silence. I headed to the left toward my room and let her rest for the night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I wiped away the remaining tears from my eyes. Thinking of Mama made me remember why I had come here in the first place. Mr. Burke must have been confused as to why I had finished dinner early and headed up the stairs so quickly. He had stood outside my door and apologized for something he had not done. I could not bear to answer him. However, his voice was soothing; attractive. His eyes at supper were too much for me to bear. The last thing I needed now was to fall for a man I would never see again after all this.

The attraction he had for me did not matter anyway…although, it was flattering. No man had ever looked at me the way he had before. I thought about Mr. Burke for a moment; the way he watched me.
The way he so easily shared his secret with me.
The way he cared to ask how I was before I had run up to my room for sanctuary.
The way he had apologized for thinking I was upset at him with his attractive, husky voice as he spoke…

Enough!

None of this mattered because I would be leaving soon….I quickly realized my tears were not the only reason for my quick departure earlier. I realized I am attracted to Mr. Burke; more than I had previously thought. Sure he is attractive, but I am only here temporarily. I knew that if I were to indulge in any feelings for this man whatsoever, we could both be hurt. Not only that; if I got distracted even if only for a moment, I could lose my chance at finding Jack. I was losing time and I had not gained any idea of where Jack was. From now on I would have to focus on finding a way to locate Jack.

Chapter Text

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I woke up to remember that I had cried myself to sleep the night before. Tears had stained my pillow at the thought of what had happened to my parents because of what Jack had done to them fifteen years earlier. I am going to kill that bastard if it is the last thing I do! I got out of bed grumbling silently to myself and headed to the bathroom. I then headed downstairs remembering I had not cleaned up the night before. Oh great! Just great! Now I have more things to do today!

When I reached the bottom of the stairs, I turned to my left to head to the sink to start cleaning the dishes from the night before. When I saw the sink, to my surprise the dishes were washed and put away. I did not understand. Mr. Burke must have done them before bed. I told him I would do them in the morning. Why would he do the dishes for me when it was my job to do them? That was our agreement. Was he cross with me for not doing them right away?

I started breakfast for Mr. Burke and I. He came downstairs shortly after. “Good morning,” he said. I replied the same, only in a confused manner. “Thank you for cleaning up,” I said afterward.

I hesitated to say what else was on my mind, but I went for it anyway. “Are you angry with me? I was not expecting you to…” I started, but did not finish. “It is all right. I am not angry with you, but I would like some answers. Did I do something wrong to cause you to leave so suddenly?” He asked. “No,” I replied simply. “Then why did you leave so suddenly the way you did?”

I looked down away from his gaze, then turned to look down and tend the sausages sizzling in the pan. I needed an excuse to avoid the question. I did not want anyone knowing my business, or my past. “I do not wish to discuss it,” I told him. A moment of silence went by, then he finally said, “At least answer me this; are you upset with me at all?” “No.” He stayed silent after that, and sat down and waited a moment for breakfast until it was done.

I plated the food and sat down. We started eating in silence. I realized shortly after that he had not given me a reason for his behaviour the night before. Why had he acted so strange after we had left the saloon? I wanted an answer. “You never told me why you seemed upset last night, after we left the saloon, you did not even mention it once we stepped inside your door. His eyes went blank. He remained silent and chewed his food. “You have remained silent on your matter, now I shall remain silent on mine,” he said after a moment.

He looked down and took another bite of his food. He was avoiding me. Well, not for long. “Oh come on, I answered one of your questions, now it is only fair that you answer one of mine,” I said in a smooth, attractive voice. He looked at me; I could tell he liked it when I spoke to him like that. However, he sat there chewing his food and said nothing. I would have to coax him for an answer, which would mean I may have to answer his other question. I played innocent.

“Alright, I will answer your previous question as to why I left so suddenly last night during supper, if you tell me your reason first.” There was an interest in his eyes. He seemed to think about it for a moment, but gave up and remained stubborn. Why would he not answer me? What was so important that he could not tell me? I persisted.

“At least answer me this; did it have to do with the secret you told me?” I asked. He swallowed his food and looked at me in thought. “Yes,” he finally said. I smiled. “There; was that so hard?” I asked him. He saw me smiling and a smile formed on his face. “Yes,” he replied, then his face went more serious.

He ate in silence after that. He finally spoke up after several moments. He mentioned that there had been news of a bank robbery in a town not too far from here. I scoffed and uttered something under my breath about lowlife scums, then went on to say, “People think they can go around doing whatever they want. Not caring about anything or anyone else. A bunch of mindless scum is what they are,” I said matter-of-factly. Mr. Burke gave me a look.

I went to take another bite of my food, then thought of Jack. I scoffed silently again. Mr. Burke was about to take a bite of his food, but stopped and looked up at me with a discerning look. He must have heard me. “Along with scumbags, I also wish to avoid the sheriff,” I said, thinking of Jack and how he had scarred me for life. I took a bite of my food, hinting to Mr. Burke that I did not wish to discuss why I said what I did.

He finished chewing the remainder of his food, then asked, “Why is that?” I did not wish to answer him. I simply replied, “I have my reasons.” “Well, what about the deputy?” He asked me a moment later, once he realized I was not going to answer his first question. I looked up at him. “Him too,” I replied. He remained silent after that.

Not long after, he got up and headed to work. I realized after he had left that I still did not know where Mr. Burke headed off to each day. I was going to try to find out today where he worked. I had to remember to ask him. But first, I had to find out the whereabouts of Jack.

After getting ready for the day, I headed out to find out if anyone had seen him or heard any news of his whereabouts. Many people did not even know who he was! After 15 years many of them had forgotten who he was. Those who did remember the name did not know anything about where he might be. After hours of trying to find some information, I was becoming very frustrated. I had been here all this time, and so far it had gotten me nowhere!

As I was walking around after talking to so many people, I figured I would stop by the saloon and talk to Gob. He may have been reserved, but he was friendly. It seemed I could use a drink. I walked in the saloon, and again, all eyes were on me. The men stared at me for a moment as I walked up to Gob.

I noticed Nova standing near the left wall of the bar again, flirting with the men. She was smiling until she noticed me. It almost looked like she saw me as competition. Well, I was not after her men, nor Mr. Burke; she could have them all for all I cared. Her and I acknowledged each other as a greeting, as I continued to walk towards the bar, then I turned away from her and faced Gob.

“Why the long face?” He asked me. I sighed and said, “Long story.” “I’ve got time. Believe me, I have heard many stories from all sorts of people. I am here to listen if you need a friend. Besides, any friend of Pan’s is a friend of mine.”

I just looked at him in silence. This man barely knew me, and yet he was such a kind man. I did not want to tell him about my personal affairs, but I figured I could find out some information. “I am looking for a man named Jack Tanton. Have you seen him?” I asked him.

He stared at me for a quick moment, then said with a low tone, “I have not heard that name in a while. It has only been the past couple of weeks that I have heard any mention of him. No, I have not seen him, but I have heard he has been spotted not too far from here.” “Where was he spotted?” “I am not sure; somewhere west of here I think.”

“Where did you hear this information?” I asked him curiously. “Someone that was passing through. I do not know their name. Out of curiosity, why are you looking for Jack?” I hesitated to answer, but I figured it would not hurt. “He and I have a score to settle,” I replied simply.

He watched my reaction for a moment. “I will tell you what; the first round is on the house. Do you want your usual?” Finally! Some good news. I accepted by nodding my head gently a couple of times and he got me a whisky. While he was occupied, I thought of Mr. Burke. He and Gob had been very good to me while staying here. By the way Gob spoke about him, he seemed well respected around these parts.

Gob then came back a placed my whisky on the rocks in front of me. “Thank you. You and Mr. Burke have been most kind to me since I have been here. I do not know what I would have done if he had not offered me to stay with him. I am surprised this town does not have a motel,” I mentioned, then took a swig of my drink. “We do have a motel, right around the corner from here,” he said.

I stared blankly at him. I was surprised at his remark. “But Mr. Burke made it sound like the only places to stay were with him or with the whor…” I said, cutting my sentence short. I looked at Nova. She had not heard me. I looked back at Gob and corrected myself by lowering my voice, “…with Nova.” He understood.

The saloon doors swung open. All eyes in the bar turned to spectate a new customer who had just entered and was making their way to the bar where Gob and I were. The new customer was rough-looking and looked to be in his late forties. He sat a few seats down from me at the bar. He was overweight, with dark greasy hair and a large bushy mustache. Gob went to tend to him.

I took another swig of my drink. Why would Mr. Burke lie to me? Why did he not mention that there was a motel? I was agitated at the thought that he had been untruthful to me. I then thought about how he had still not told me what his occupation was. I waited until Gob was done with his new customer to ask him what Mr. Burke’s occupation was.

I waited patiently, despite the tightness in my chest from being angry with Mr. Burke. When Gob was finally free, he came back to me and apologized for leaving me to tend to the other customer. “What does Mr. Burke do?” I burst out. I could not take it any longer; I needed to know. “As a job I mean,” I said to clarify my question. “He is the deputy of this town. The best one too. There has never been one like him,” Gob replied.

With the way I was feeling, I was pretty sure a large vein in my neck would burst for sure. I stared blankly at Gob, trying not to show how furious I was at Mr. Burke for lying to me all this time. He never told me he was the deputy of this town, let alone that there actually was a motel. What kind of sheriff lies to a visitor anyway?

“Where is the sheriff’s office?” I asked Gob. “It is right down the road from here. When you walk out of the saloon, go right, down the road. It is not too far; it will lead you right to it. The office will be on your right-hand side,” he said. I finished my drink. “The motel is just down the road from there; it is not too far” he continued.

I thanked Gob and mentioned to keep our conversation only between him and I. I then got out my wallet. He reminded me that the drink was free. I smiled at him and gave him the money anyway. “For your help and kindness,” I told him.” He looked down at the money, then at me. I smiled, then walked away. Something told me that when I left, he was smiling too.

Chapter Text

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I headed out of the saloon and went to find the sheriff’s office. Surely Mr. Burke would be there at his desk beside the sheriff. I wanted answers. Why did he lie to me? What reason did he have to lie?

~.~ Mr. Burke ~.~

All day I kept thinking about Roselyn. Her comments about wanting to avoid the sheriff and deputy were strange. Was she running away from the law? No, that could not be it. What would she have against authority? For some reason she wanted nothing to do with me.

I am the deputy of this town. I never told her. I did not want to tell her. Some folk might feel uncomfortable to board with the deputy; I could not have that with her. When I first saw her, I had to get to know her and make my potential claim. She is too beautiful and intriguing to pass up and let the hungry wolves hold her in their grasp.

Tell her. Why did I not tell her? I did not tell her because I did not want her to leave…I wonder if she would have left if she knew. How can I tell her now? I suppose it does not matter. Maybe she will not find out. Maybe she would not care if she knew. She will be gone soon anyway. Why would it matter now? She is only staying about a month or so. After that, I will never see her again…

 ~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I found the sheriff’s office and stepped up on the porch. I opened the door to walk inside. A dark-skinned man looked up to me. He had black hair, brown eyes, a mustache and a beard with hints of grey whiskers hidden among them. His badge read ‘Sheriff’. “Well hello. I am Sheriff Lucas Simms. You can call me Simms. What can I do for you Ma’am?” “I am looking for the deputy. Would you ever so kindly point me in his direction?” I asked, being overly friendly.

“Why, certainly. He is right through there,” Simms said, pointing toward my left. “Thank you kindly,” I replied. Simms smiled and replied, “You are very welcome. I am glad to be of service.” He stood up, put on his duster coat and hat, and then walked out the door to give Mr. Burke and I some privacy. The sheriff was very friendly. I was not expecting him to be so kind.

I looked away from him and headed toward Mr. Burke. He was not expecting me. I silently walked toward him and saw him sitting at a desk to the left. To the right, there was an empty jail cell. He looked as if he was deep in thought. “So you are the deputy of this town,” I said to him. He looked up at me. When he saw who it was standing before him, he had a guilty expression on his face. He said nothing. He was speechless.

“Why did you not tell me that you were the deputy?” I asked, somewhat perturbed. I went on saying, “Even after I mentioned I wished to avoid the deputy, you said nothing! Now I have found out that not only are you the deputy, but that there is a motel in this town. Why did you not tell me these things? Why did you lie to me?” “Well, I…” he started, but could not think of what to say to defend himself.

“I demand an answer! Why did you not tell me?” I went on. “I did not lie to you. I simply did not specify that there is a motel,” he said in defense. I narrowed my eyes at him and hinted for more. “I have been the deputy the whole time. You needed somewhere to stay and I offered you a chance to stay with me. Is that a crime?”

I kept my gaze on him to see if there was more he had to say. He looked worried and eventually looked away from me and avoided my gaze. “You are hiding something from me,” I stated. He remained silent. “What is it?” I asked him, pressing for an answer. He still remained silent.

I narrowed my eyes even more and finally he cracked and spoke up. “I cannot tell you,” he said. This annoyed me. “Is it that you cannot tell me, or that you simply will not tell me?” I asked somewhat angered. He returned his gaze to me, then looked away from me again to avoid my gaze. I grunted angrily under my breath and left in a hurry.

Simms was blocking my way. When he noticed me he asked, “Did everything go alright?” Angrily I quickly uttered, “Get your deputy to check his moral status at the door.” He looked at me confused. I walked away without an explanation.

Why would Mr. Burke not answer me? What was so important that he had to keep it from me? I need to get away from here. I need to find Jack. This evening, I will ask for the money Mr. Burke owes me and then head out of town.

 ~.~ Mr. Burke ~.~

Roselyn knows. She knows I am the deputy and she did not take it too well. It is how I feared. This is exactly what I did not want. This is exactly why I did not tell her I was the deputy. I never lied to her. I chose not to tell her something about myself to prevent her from leaving this town.

Should I tell her that I did not tell her about the motel, and the fact that I was the deputy because I did it for her? I did it all for her; to win her heart, because the moment she walked in the saloon door, I could not keep her out of my sight. She was breathtaking. When she hinted at being left alone, it only made me want her more. She was a challenge, and I liked that.

I watched her; the way she moved, the way she breathed, the way she noticed I was watching her…it was like a game. Would she come to me, or ignore me? Sure enough, she came over like the sexy young woman she had become, and I enjoyed every second of it. As a deputy, I have had to deal with challenges. Roselyn is a challenge of her own. I had my work cut out for me with her.

I had hoped she would stay and get to know me, and in time, I would tell her whom I was. In time, she would get to know me. I would woo her to win her heart, and maybe, just maybe, it would turn into something more. Then, I would have a chance at love. Real love, and this time, I wanted to do it right. My past mistake with Rebecca has haunted me for years. Now, Roselyn and I could give each other to one another, and this time I would not have to feel guilty about it.

I gave a long sigh. What was I going to do now? Roselyn is angry with me. Will she leave? A sudden discomfort swept over me. The thought of her leaving left a detestable feeling.

I knew I had to apologize to her after work. I would be saddened if she left me so suddenly without a chance…a second chance at love. Watching my best friend Jonathan marry Charlotte had only made me feel even lonelier after he had moved out. He was living happily living with his wife; making love to her as much as he pleased. I wanted the same chance with a woman I could marry, in time. The question was, would Roselyn stick around and be here long enough for us to have that chance?

Chapter Text

~.~ Mr. Burke ~.~

Sheriff Simms walked inside and came up too me with a confused expression on his face. “What in Heaven’s name did you do to that young lady?” He asked. “We simply had a misunderstanding,” I mentioned without going into detail. “Do you know what she said to me? ‘Get your deputy to check his moral status at the door.’ She sounded upset. Now I do not mean to get into your personal affairs, but I think you should go and speak with her and make things right when you have the chance.”

I knew he was only trying to help Roselyn and I. After he had made his point with a sincere, soft expression, he went back to his desk. I knew I had to make things right between Roselyn and I. Did I really anger her that badly? My intentions were never to upset her, yet I had done just that. The need to apologize to her grew even more and the last hour of work went by slowly. The clock on the wall ticked loudly; taunting me with every second. I just wanted to leave and speak to her.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

Mr. Burke walked in right when supper was done cooking. He looked at me and knew that I was not pleased with him. I dished out the food silently as he walked over to the kitchen from the door. “I am sorry for not telling you that I was the deputy. If I misled you about the motel, I apologize for that too. I did not mean to displease you,” he said sincerely. I walked to the table with the plates and placed his dinner on the table, as well as mine.

We both sat down to eat. I continued to give him the silent treatment out of hopes he would understand how much he had angered me. We ate in silence for a long moment. “I am sorry, but I must ask; are you in trouble with the law?” He asked me. The nerve! I quickly looked at him sternly. “No,” I replied with sass, then looked down at my plate. I wanted him to get off my back about the topic and leave me alone.

He was clearly looking for a death wish when he asked me, “Do you have a problem with authority?” I then flashed him an angry glare and angrily said, “No!” He had some balls to keep on questioning me. “Then why do you not want to have anything to do with authority?” I remained silent. He had no right to ask that question, especially after what I have been through!

He went on to add, “I will not judge you, nor convict you if you have done something wrong. I simply need to know.” I tried my best not to lunge at him. I remained seated in my seat for the time being, and tried my best to set him straight. “When I came here, you agreed to mind your own business, and now you will do just that! Stay out of my business!” I demanded. He did not mess with me after that. I had finally gotten my point across.

“I did not mean to anger you. I apologize,” he said. I kept quiet for a few minutes, then finally spoke up. “I have asked you what you have been hiding from me, and still, I have not received an answer from you. If you are truly sorry, then I need an answer. I want the truth!”

He looked at me sincerely, but there was something else in his gaze. No man had ever looked at me that way before. His eyes were soft and bore at me intensely. “Do you really want to know?” There was a look in his eyes that told me I should not ask. Or is it that I did not want to hear his answer? Maybe it was something I was not ready for.

I backed down and his intensity subsided. The question of what he was hiding from me and why he never told me about the motel, or he, being a deputy, remained. However, maybe I would be ready for the answer in time. He almost seemed as though he was going to tell me if I had said yes to his question. Yes, I really did want to know the answer, but for now, I would let it slide.

Something about the way he had looked at me was too much for me to handle if his response was what I thought the answer might be...

I know he has feelings for me. However, if he did all of this purposely to keep me near him, it would frighten me. The thought of it was flattering, but very uneasy to think about. I barely knew the man. Something told me I already knew what the answer was, and I could not bear to hear it.

“Look, you must know by now that the reason I have never told anyone about sleeping with Nova is because I am the deputy. A reputation like that needs to be respected. If I had gossip going around about me, it could ruin my image; what authority would I have if others did not respect me? Then there is the matter of potentially losing my job. Please, do not say a word of this to anyone. My job depends on it,” he said sincerely.

I looked at him for a moment. There was a desperate expression of his face. I finally realized then that the reason he had kicked the ground the day he told me about him and Nova was because he did not want anyone to find out about them sleeping together. If I had ever said anything to anyone about him and Nova, it could have caused a lot of trouble for him. I nodded in agreement. ’

“Thank you,” he said sincerely. Again, his eyes became intensely focused on me, but gentle and caring. For a moment, we looked at each other in silence. We understood each other. I looked away from him finally and thought about the money he owed me. “I was wondering if I could get this week’s spending money you promised me, ahead of time. We never really agreed on an amount or a day you would give it to me.”

He thought for a moment. “You are right. Well, considering costs like room and board, let us say ten dollars a month. How does that sound?” “That sounds fair,” I replied. “I will give you half now, and half later on in the month,” he added. I nodded and went on to finish eating my meal.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After dinner, he handed me the money he owed me. We both headed over to the saloon to visit Gob. Mr. Burke and I sat down at the bar together and started up a conversation with Gob. I never mentioned to Mr. Burke that Gob had told me about the motel and about Mr. Burke being a deputy. That secret was between Gob and I, and I preferred it be kept that way.

I noticed Nova watching me. She did not want me sitting in my place beside Mr. Burke. She was talking with a man and she was watching to see if Mr. Burke was watching. He did notice, and she made sure of it. The man then got up and she led the man she was with toward the saloon doors with her. She wanted to make Mr. Burke jealous by showing him she was about to lay with another man. Disgusting. I could tell Mr. Burke felt saddened; not because he was jealous, but because of the sexual lifestyle she was living as a result of him sleeping with her years ago.

“Are you alright?” I asked Mr. Burke. He looked down and did not answer. I went to tell Gob I would buy another whisky for Mr. Burke, when I noticed something odd. He was staring at the saloon doors with a saddened look on his face. Why would Gob be saddened by what Nova was about to do? For Mr. Burke’s sake? It did not make any sense. Unless…did Gob have feelings for Nova?

Yes! That is it! It must be it. Now there were two men saddened over her disgusting acts. I wanted to ask Gob if he was alright, but he then went to serve some customers some more drinks. I turned my attention to Mr. Burke. He must see Nova do this often. He constantly had to live with the reminder of what his mistake of sleeping with her only one time had led to. She must constantly taunt him to try to convince him to sleep with her. I was becoming angered at the thought of it. She had so much control over him, except to make him sleep with her again. Now that I was here, she must have made it even more of a challenge to make him jealous to get back at him.

I placed my hand on Mr. Burke’s shoulder to comfort him. He raised his eyes toward me, and slowly, he smiled. Gob then came back and he started a conversation with Mr. Burke. I did not care to follow it. I was angry with Nova. She had no right to manipulate Mr. Burke like this. Someone should teach her a lesson! She is not the only one who needs to be taught a lesson, I thought to myself, thinking of Jack. He is somewhere nearby and I am determined to find him.

All I have to do now is find a way to locate Jack and I will be set. Tomorrow I will head out of town and continue my search for him. Gob mentioned he might have been spotted west of here, so that is where I will head towards. It was my only lead to find Jack. I could not wait to blow that bastard away. After all these years, I might finally have a chance to find him after he disappeared and went in hiding after what he had done to my family years ago.

While in thought, I noticed Mr. Burke turn to look at me. My eyes met his and he looked at me, as though he were concerned about something. I knew he was already upset, but it seemed as though he was anxious about something else. It seemed as though that something might have to do with me. “What is wrong?” I asked him. He looked down at his empty glass of whisky. He did not answer me. I knew the problem was not that he had finished his drink. I offered to buy him another drink if he wanted one. He shook his head. “No. Thank you.” he said.

I knew he was still upset about Nova. “I think I will head back home and turn in early tonight. Are you coming?” He said. I quickly thought of Gob and how he reacted when he saw Nova leave with another man. I wanted to find out why he was saddened. “No, not yet. I will remain here a little while longer,” I replied.

He got up, said goodnight to Gob, and then nodded his head once to me respectfully. “Goodnight,” he said. He then walked toward the door to leave the saloon, leaving behind his money to pay for the drink and tip for Gob. I watched him as he left. He turned around to look at me before he left, then headed out. I then turned my attention to Gob.

Gob noticed my focus was on him now. I did not wait to ask him the question I wanted answered. “I noticed you were saddened when Nova left with that man. Why?” It seemed as though I had caught him off guard. “Well, it is a sad thing to see, when a woman chooses to do those kinds of acts,” he replied.

I did not buy it. There was more in his expression. “Do you have feelings for her?” I asked. He hesitated and looked around to see if anyone could hear us. “Yes, but I know I can never be with her. She is set on trying to win Pan’s…affections. She will sleep with any other man that walks in here until Pan commits his affections to her. She does not even notice me,” Gob said with a sense of sadness in his tone.

It was sad; Nova had a chance to be with someone who cared about her, but her whorish acts had changed everything. What if Gob was her soulmate? He could never be happy. He would just have to watch her sleep around with other men, and never be truly happy. Gob was a great man, a gentleman even. He deserved better than this. He deserved to be happy.

“Have you ever told her or Mr. Burke how you feel?” I asked. His features softened slightly. He looked down. “I have never told anyone. Especially not Pan; not after they both…” he had started, but trailed off, leaving his sentence unfinished. He suddenly realized he had said too much. He did not realize I knew Mr. Burke had slept with Nova.

“I did not mean…Pan is a close friend of mine; I did not mean to slander his good name. Please, do not say anything to anyone about what I have said,” he said, worried. “It is alright Gob; I will not say anything. You have my word,” I said to reassure him. He seemed to calm down. His nervousness subsided.

I wished him a goodnight and headed back to Mr. Burke’s to head to bed for the night. He was already in his room with the door shut when I arrived. I walked up the stairs and got ready for bed. I then quickly gathered my things together to leave in the morning to find Jack. I would leave soon after Mr. Burke went to work, then I would get on my horse and ride west.

Chapter Text

 Chapter 8

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

Guilt and distress swept over me when I saw Nova flirting with yet another man in the saloon. My stomach became uneasy as she left with him. I knew what they were about to do. It seems I should have gotten used to it by now; expecting this. Yet every time she left to do those horrible deeds, despite me, I felt like this. These feelings had lessened over the years, but tonight Roselyn was witnessing it firsthand. She knew how all this had started after I had slept with Nova, and how this was all my fault.

Often, I had to watch Nova walk out of the saloon with different men. Over and over again I had to live with my mistake. I remembered that I had stolen away Nova’s innocence, and I could never give that back to her. She was my first as well, but there is nothing I would not give to take that day back. In the morning when I awoke after sleeping with her, I had realized what I had done. It was all just a stupid mistake. One that has caused me years of grief.

Shame had swept over me that morning. I had been raised better than that; I was raised as a gentleman. I wanted to leave quietly so no one would find out what I had done. When I tried to leave Nova’s house the morning after she and I had slept together, she had caught me and begged me to make love to her again. I refused. I did not love her. After what I had done, after stealing her innocence away, I never wanted to hurt her.

She pestered me day and night to be with her, and each time I refused her desperate pleas. Now, it has led to her sleeping around with more men than I could keep track of. Most men who used her...services were regulars, but some she did not even know; they were just passing through town and wanted a cheap and easy lay before leaving the next morning. It was all my fault. Despite refusing her pleas to sleep with her again, she continued to beg me. I had been tempted many times to give into her beckoning, but I knew if I gave into her again that everything would only end up starting all over again. I refused to use her like that.

I made mistakes which led to this life of hers, yes, but as Roselyn had tried to tell me, I cannot blame myself because Nova had made the choice to sleep with me too. It was her choice to get drunk that night. As I recall, she was giving me seductive glances that night. We laughed together. We bonded together. It was her choice to sleep with me that night; to give herself away to me. It was her choice to sleep with different men when I chose not to use her.

Now I have to try to remember that it was her choice to sleep with all of those men. Her choice…because of what I had done…

“Are you alright?” Roselyn asked me, interrupting my thoughts about Nova. I looked at her but could not answer her. I looked down and tried to collect myself. My head hung low from the guilt I felt. How could I ever forgive myself?

I looked up when I felt Roselyn touch my shoulder tenderly a few moments later. I made an effort to smile at the thought of her trying to comfort me. How glorious it would be if Roselyn would stay for a while longer. I could win her heart in time. A month, if I even had a month, was such a short time to be with her. It is a horrible thought to have her slip through my fingers when I could have made her so happy one day.

For now, I would have to settle with getting through tonight without making a fool of myself in front of Roselyn. Lamenting over the guilt I feel from past sins in front of her is not going to win her heart. I need to stop thinking about Nova and what she was doing right now. I had the urge to leave the saloon and head home alone, but I rejected the thought for the moment, thinking of Roselyn.

“Have you heard about the recent robberies in the nearby towns? They say a group of notorious gang members is going around robbing a bunch of banks and then fleeing on horses,” Gob mentioned. I nodded and started talking with Gob about the robberies, but soon after he went to help another customer. I then thought of how Roselyn had asked me for the money she had earned by working for me early. Was she going somewhere?

I looked at her, concerned and despondent. What would I do without her? She has only been with me for a short time and already I have grown so attached to her. Seeing her has brought me joy again. She has brought me hope again. I do not wish for her to leave.

“Is something else wrong?” She asked me, concerned. I looked down at my empty glass of whisky. I did not answer her. How can I? How can I tell her I am down because of the thought of her leaving? She would most likely think I am being ridiculous. Knowing that I am emotionally down, she offered to buy me another whisky. I refused and shook my head. “No. Thank you,” I replied.

I could not afford to make another mistake, especially not with Roselyn. We have both been drinking and I wanted to play things safe. She knew there was something wrong. I could see it by the way she looked at me. “I think I will head back home and turn in early tonight. Are you coming?” I asked her. She thought for a quick moment and replied, “No, not yet. I will remain here a little while longer.”

I got up, said good night to Gob. I then looked at Roselyn and nodded my head once respectfully. “Good night,” I told her. I paid Gob and walked toward the saloon door to leave the saloon. I turned around to look at Roselyn before I left. She was already looking at me as I turned to look back at her. The thought of leaving her here alone with all these drunken dogs in here did not sit well with me. However, I knew she was with Gob and that he would keep an eye on her. I reluctantly walked out of the saloon and headed home.

I suppose it was best that I left early, leaving Roselyn at the saloon with Gob. I did not want to take advantage of her the same way I had done with Nova. Shame swept over me again. I then remembered what Roselyn had told me. Nova had made her own choices and I had to stop blaming myself. Easier said than done. Deep down I knew it was the alcohol that had made me make the stupid decision to sleep with Nova. I knew I did not sleep with her just for the sake of using her. However, the guilt I felt made me feel that way.

Not too long after I had lain down, I heard Roselyn walk in the front door downstairs. I heard her climb the stairs gently and close the door to her room. We have both been drinking tonight. I knew I needed to remain in my bed; that is where I needed to stay. I was not going to let some stupid decision be made again because of the effects of alcohol. Despite the urge, I respected Roselyn and it was going to stay that way. I thought of Roselyn as I drifted off to sleep.

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~.~ Roselyn ~.~

In the morning I made breakfast for Mister Burke and I as usual. After he left for work I made supper for him and some food to take with me on my trip since I was not coming back here tonight. I made an extra helping of supper so he would have some for the next day when I would not be here to make another meal to serve to him. This way, he could just reheat the food on the stove quickly tomorrow for supper. I packed some extra food to take along with me for my horse as well.

After that, I got ready and fed my horse like I did every day. I filled my canteen with water and packed all my things on my horse. I then headed west to see if I could find any clues as to the whereabouts of Jack. I never mentioned to Mister Burke that I was leaving. I suppose it did not matter. My business was my own.

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~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

All day I had been thinking about how Roselyn had asked for her money early. Something about it did not sit well with me. I had been anxious about it all day. I was sure it was nothing to worry about it, but my stomach did not believe it. I left a few minutes to five and headed home for the night. Now I would be able to put my worries to rest.

I walked in to find the kitchen empty. No delicious smells wafting through the air. No sign of her anywhere. I called her name. No answer. I called again. Maybe she did not hear me. Nothing.

I thought of where she might be. Maybe she is just out walking her horse. Like I would believe that. Maybe she was visiting with someone. Yes, that is a possibility. I looked around town.

I checked the saloon and did not spot her. I asked Gob if he had seen her. I then went to Charlotte and asked if she knew where Roselyn was. She could see the concern on my face as I desperately tried to find Roselyn.

I checked the saloon and did not spot her. I asked Gob if he had seen her. I then went to Charlotte and asked if she knew where Roselyn was. She could see the concern on my face as I desperately tried to find Roselyn.

Charlotte and Gob had not seen Roselyn today at all. I told them to let me know if she was spotted in town. Surely she would not have left town without saying goodbye. I had no clue where she might have gone. If she had left to go back home, her rightful home, I would not even know where to look if I wanted to find her...

Saddened, I went back home without finding any hint as to where Roselyn might have been. Even though it was supper time, I barely had an appetite. All I could think about was Roselyn. Where was she? Had she left a note?

I searched for a note. Nothing. I stood in the kitchen, leaning against the counter looking down. Roselyn, where are you? I remained that way for a few moments, then checked the fridge. It seemed she had thought of me.

There was a large dish of something in the fridge. I heated up the food and ate. Her cooking was heavenly. Cooking meals came to her naturally. She had been taught how to cook very well. Her meals reminded me of my mother’s cooking.

I would watch my mother cook sometimes. I enjoyed watching Roselyn as well. The way her long hair draped over her arm. The way she tasted the food to make sure it was just right. The way she was so determined to please me. When she was around, everything felt like home again. I would have to tell her how much I loved her meals…if I still had the chance.

Later on, I went to bed wondering if I would ever see Roselyn again. Did I miss my chance with her? I knew she did not know exactly how long she was staying, but she had estimated a month. Why would she leave so early? All these questions had me concerned. To say I got little sleep that night would be an understatement.

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I awoke to thoughts of Roselyn. I got up, opened my door and checked to see if she was in her room. The door to her room was open. I peered inside and found the room empty. I called out her name to see if she had come in the front door at some time during the night. I listened for a reply. No answer.

To my dismay, she had not returned. Maybe this was fate telling me her and I were not meant to be and I was left to live my life alone in misery. I sat there staring at my breakfast realizing that I missed her. Why had she wanted the money so early? I knew something was off when she had asked me for her pay early. Why did I give her the money early? Now it was too late to see if I ever had a chance with her.

I finished my meal, got ready and left for work. All day Roselyn was on my mind. Questions kept going through my mind. Had she returned? Had she found who she was looking for? What if she never comes back? I had to stop worrying about her. I knew she was not staying long. Nevertheless, why would she leave after such a short amount of time? It did not make any sense. She had given no warnings.

A horrible thought crossed my mind. Did she leave because of our disagreement? I had apologized to her for not telling her I was the deputy and for not telling her about the motel in town. I had also apologized for making her angry about asking her if she was in trouble with the law. She had sure been angry with me, but afterward, she had seemed fine. Maybe I had misjudged the situation.

Was she that cross with me that she deliberately left with her money, never to return again? I had not realized I had made her so angry. My heart was saddened at the thought. I could not think of any other reason for her to leave. My head hung low as I thought of her being so desperate to leave. So desperate to get away from me that she never said goodbye.

Chapter Text

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

As I walked home from work I was still hopeful of finding Roselyn at home when I walked in the door. When I arrived home and walked through the door, my heart sank to find the house empty yet another day. I walked slowly to the kitchen and pulled open the fridge to find leftovers that Roselyn had made the day before. She was thoughtful. I almost smiled at the thought of her thinking about making a meal for me ahead of time even though she was now gone. Well, if this is my life now, I will have to try to get over her.

I scoffed at myself mockingly to think that my feelings for her could be so easily disregarded. If this was only infatuation, I would hate to feel what love is like. To love someone so much and then lose them when they were so precious to you would be devastating. Maybe it was better that she left so suddenly; that way I would not have to face her and watch her walk away from me. These thoughts saddened me.

I heated up my food and tried to get my mind off of Roselyn. I sat down and started eating. I looked across from me where she used to sit and realized how alone I really felt without her. The house was lonely and quiet without her around. A person could go mad in their own thoughts being so alone like this. Why did she leave? The question kept going through my mind without any real answers. I kept thinking she left because she is still angry with me over something so stupid!

“Uuugh!” I uttered, throwing my fork across the table. I was not in the mood to eat. All I could think about was Roselyn. Maybe drowning my sorrows in some whisky would help. I reconsidered that thought; I knew that would not help. It would not bring her back and I would only end up suffering the next day with a hangover. That would be horrible, as I have to work tomorrow. I had been through that once before and I will not do it again. I had learned my lesson in my younger years when I had just become the deputy. It was a stupid mistake I admit, but one that needed to be learned.

Just because I did not want to drown my sorrows in alcohol did not mean I could not visit my friend Gob in the saloon. I got up from the table and went upstairs to change my clothes. I then headed over to the saloon to see Gob. When he saw me walk up to him he asked, “What has you so down?” “Roselyn has not returned yet. I am starting to think I will never have my chance with her.” I sat down at the bar. “You really like her,” he said. I did not respond to him. He could already see how upset I was; he already knew why.

“Have a drink on the house,” he said trying to cheer me up. Gob has been a great friend to me over the years. It was a tempting offer. One whisky could not hurt. I nodded my head to him. “It seems you have offered me one too many drinks over the years when I have been upset,” I stated to him. “Yeah well, you seem to have needed them,” he said. He then went to prepare my drink for me.

I looked around the room to find that Nova was not present tonight. Good. I did not need to have to deal with her tonight as well; I was already upset about Roselyn leaving. Gob set my whisky down in front of me on the bar. I took a drink of my whisky. I came here to see Gob but I really needed time alone. He went to help a customer that wanted another round of whatever they were drinking. I took my leave from the bar and headed over to my usual spot in the corner to be alone.

I sat down and drank my drink slowly. I watched the customers in the bar. It was not too crowded yet. The customers usually ended up arriving later on in the evening. It usually picked up around seven or eight, varying each night. The crowd in the saloon usually lasted until around ten. Some ended up staying later. I have spent many nights here after work. Keeping the crowds in control just from my presence in the room did not hurt either. When customers saw the deputy in the room, they remained in line with the law.

I finished the remains of my drink and set it down on the table beside me. The condensation from the glass was still on my hand and had made a ring of water where my glass had sat on the small table beside me. No sooner than I had placed my glass down again a familiar face walked in the saloon; a face I did not want to see tonight. Nova noticed me in the corner and came over to pester me.

“Well look who it is all alone in his chair. No brat tonight?” She asked, referring to Roselyn. I did not take kindly to her rudeness. “She is not a brat. I am not in the mood for your putrescent ramblings. Go and pester someone else.” She immediately shut her mouth and gave a pout. Her features suddenly turned sour. “Fine,” she said in a low, annoyed tone before turning around and walking toward the other side of the room.

She started talking to a man who had his eyes on her as soon as she had walked in. He seemed to have wanted more from her than just staring at her for her looks. Nova took notice of this and started flirting with him. I tried to ignore her showy giggles and playful shoves which the man had found attractive. He was looking at her like he wanted to devour her. I looked away from it all and tried to mind my own business.

I came here to get away from my problems, not to run into more. I kept my hand on the cool glass I had previously been drinking from. I tried to focus on something else rather than Nova's irritating flirtatious laughing. Anything else. Roselyn came to mind. The way she smiled. The way her braid fell down her left shoulder. The way she made me want her more and more since the day I had met her.

I became very annoyed when my thoughts of Roselyn were interrupted by more of Nova's infuriating laughter. She whispered something into the man's ear. He seemed to like the idea of whatever she was saying to him. She then looked at me and smiled deviously just to irritate me and make me jealous. I could not take any more of this. I got up from my chair, headed for the saloon door and walked out. I could have sworn I seen her pout as I walked by her to leave the saloon.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

It had been a long ride to get to where I was now. I had been riding for hours and now the sun was getting low. The beautiful colours in the sky reminded me of better times. I tied up my horse in the stable where I had been keeping him. I was frustrated that I had not found Jack yet. I walked toward the house where I had been staying and walked in. I realized the tenant was not home.

I was hungry. It had been a while since I had eaten. I heated up some food I had previously made and sat down to eat. I wondered where the owner of the home was. I had a feeling I knew where they were. When I was done eating, I got up to wash my dishes in the sink. There were several dishes still in the sink left unwashed by the owner of the house. I started washing them. When I was done, I heard the door open. The owner had returned.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

Why did Nova have to be so insolent? Is it not enough that we are friends? Is it not enough that I have chosen to respect her and not to use her? I was irritated on the walk back home from the saloon. Irritation grew to loneliness as I thought about Roselyn; knowing that she would not be here when I walked through the door to my home. In low spirits, I walked up the porch steps and opened the door to enter, then shut the door behind me.

A delicious smell wafted through the air. I quickly looked toward the kitchen to find Roselyn turn around to look at me. My heart was overjoyed to see her standing before me. “I just finished doing the dishes. I see you have not finished the meal I made for you. Did you not like it?” She said. She acted as though she had never left. Here my heart was about to burst out of my chest and she did not have a clue as to how glad I was to see her.

I smiled and replied, “On the contrary; I enjoyed it very much. In fact, I could not wait to have the chance to tell you how much I enjoy your cooking.” I stood there at the door like a fool that could not move. “Well, are you going to stand there all night or are you going to come in?” She asked. I smiled again and started to walk over to her cautiously. “Are you hungry?” She asked. “Yes, actually. I would love some of the food you had so graciously prepared for me before you left. It brought me great comfort while you were gone.”

“Comfort?” She asked. I ignored her question and asked her what I was desperate to know. “Where did you go? Why did you leave so suddenly?” I asked her gently. I needed to know if she was angry with me. “I went to try to find someone after I got a tip about where they had been spotted last.”

“Why did you not tell me why you were leaving? I thought you had left for good. I had no clue where you had gone to or if you were coming back.” “As I have already told you, my business is my own,” she stated. “Yes, but please let me know the next time you decide to leave. I need to be informed of these things. I would also like a goodbye before you leave,” I said delicately so she would understand why I was concerned.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

Mister Burke's eyes showed that he was very relieved to see me. He went on to say, “I thought the reason you had left without saying anything was because you were still angry with me. I thought I had driven you off.” I had not realized that not telling him where I was going would have such a drastic affect on him. His eyes now showed sadness. I felt bad that he thought that way. “I am sorry,” I said sincerely.

His eyes softened. “The next time I leave, I will inform you.” “Thank you.” He seemed very attached to me. The man hardly knew me, yet he stood before me like a love-sick puppy. I turned around to start heating up the food I had previously offered to reheat for him. The whole time I could feel his intensity. I realized he had missed me while I had been gone.

I turned around to find him looking at me. He smiled gently. I set down his meal in front of him and started to clean up the kitchen. He watched me for a moment as I wiped the stove clean with a rag. I pretended not to notice him. He then went to eat a short moment later. “You will have to show me how you make your meals. I quite admire them,” he said.

I looked up and turned around to look at him. He was sincere when he had said that he enjoyed it. “Tell me, where did you learn to cook meals like this?” He asked. I thought about my mama. She had taught me many things. I would watch mama cook and would even help her in the kitchen before she died. I took a moment before I answered him.

“Someone I love very much taught me,” I finally said with my eyes closed, facing the stove again. I opened them and tried my best not to shed a tear. I did not want him to know my eyes had started welling so I looked down at the stove until I could regain myself. “They taught you very well,” Mister Burke said. “Yes,” I replied, still looking down and facing away from him.

“You are in need of a shave,” I mentioned when I finally looked up and over at him; I noticed how much his stubble had grown since I left. He smiled at me. “Yes; I was going to mention it the day you left. As you can see, I have been waiting for your services.”

The way he said it was not harsh. It almost sounded as if he were looking forward to it. I gave a gentle smile. I admired his sense of humour. “Believe me, you have never had a shave anything like I can give you. When I am done with you, you are going to be wondering where I have been all your life,” I stated.

“Is that so?” He asked huskily in a slow manner. He smiled at me in a rather handsome and sly way. “We will just have to see about that now,” he added. Was he...flirting with me? To be honest, I did not mind the attention. I smiled back at him and turned around to finish cleaning up with a smile on my face. My smile faded suddenly when I thought of the way Jack had flirted with my Mama all those times, right in front of me! My face hardened, and I ended up cleaning with a hardened look on my face until it was done.

Jack had no right speaking to her that way! I huffed to myself. I hated that man. Hated him! I got lost in my own thoughts about Jack that I ended up scrubbing a little harder than I had realized. When Mister Burke was done his meal, he came up beside me to put his dish in the sink while I was scrubbing the counter viciously.

“Hey!” I heard his surprised voice from beside me as he touched my arm. I ended up looking up at him with an unintentional expression of hatred on my face. I did not realize he was there standing beside me until he spoke and touched my arm. My face softened and I realized that my hatred for Jack was now becoming apparent to Mister Burke. “Did I say something wrong?” He asked as I looked up at him.

I looked away from him and looked forward, away from his gaze. I took a moment to calm down and answer him. “No. I apologize for my behaviour,” I said, looking at him sincerely. “You do not need to apologize. Tell me what is wrong.”

I looked away from him. “I cannot do that,” I told him. “You are upset. Please tell me what is bothering you,” he pleaded gently. I knew he was trying to help me. I looked up at him to answer. I noticed a worried look upon his face. He really does care about me.

“All I can say is that I came here on business, and so far I have nothing to show for it. The contact I have been trying to locate has not been anywhere I have searched and I am becoming really angry at the fact that nothing is going right.” He stood there in silence with a soft expression on his face. “Sometimes my emotions can get the best of me,” I added on a lighter note. He gave a hidden smile that I do not think he meant for me to see.

“Well, for what it is worth, I am glad that I have met you. It is because of this business arrangement that we have met, and that is worth everything to me,” he said, quite forward. He went on to say, “I can take over cleaning up for today if you wish. I hate to see you upset like this.” I was surprised by his generosity. “You do not need to do so. If anything, cleaning helps me calm down,” I said.

“Well, alright. If you insist.” He turned around to leave. “Thank you,” I said. He turned around to face me, smiled gently and nodded once respectfully. “You are welcome.” We did not say anything for a short moment; we simply stood there gracefully in each others presence, respecting one another.

“I am going over to the saloon if you want to join me,” he finally mentioned. I wanted to go and see Gob, but I needed to catch up on some chores that needed to be done. “I have some clothes that need to be washed. I am pretty sure my absence has caused chaos to your laundry pile. He gave a short, husky chuckle. “Indeed, it has.” He seemed to enjoy my sense of humour. “I shall see you later then,” he said. I nodded and he left to go and visit with Gob.

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When I was done washing and hanging the laundry, I thought I would join Mister Burke in the saloon since he was not back yet. I walked over and went through the saloon door to find Gob greet me with a friendly smile. I smiled back and looked around for Mister Burke. Odd. He was nowhere in sight. That is strange. Did I not hear him correctly? I walked up to the bar to ask Gob if he knew where he was.

I noticed Nova staring at me without saying hi, so I did the same and ignored her as I passed. “Hey Gob, have you seen Mister Burke this evening? He said he was coming to see you earlier.” “Yes. He stopped by and stayed for about an hour, then went to visit with Jonathan and Charlotte.” “Oh,” I said. I thought for a moment about what to do next. I did not want to head over to their home uninvited. “Alright. Thank you Gob,” I said turning around to leave.

“Roselyn,” Gob said to get my attention. I looked back at him. “Yes?” “Derek was asking about you while you were gone. He seemed very concerned that you had left so suddenly and had not returned,” Gob mentioned.

Mister Burke had gone looking around town asking about me? “Thank you for letting me know,” I said, unable to figure out how I should feel about what he had just told me. I started to walk away, toward the saloon doors but stopped when Gob said, “It is good to see you.” I turned around and smiled at him warmly. “It is good to see you too.”

Chapter Text

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

Later on in the evening, I kept thinking about what Gob had said earlier. I kept going over it in my mind. When I had left to look for Jack, Mister Burke was asking about me. He was concerned as to where I was and if I was coming back. “Are you alright?” Mister Burke asked, interrupting my thoughts. I looked up at him; he was sitting in a chair in front of his dresser mirror looking at me in the reflection as I stood behind him. He was patiently waiting for me to shave him. “Yes, I was just thinking,” I replied.

I stood there in Mister Burke's bedroom. I started preparing the straight razor by stroking it back and forth against the leather strop. I noticed him watching me and tried to ignore him by focusing on the task at hand. He was admiring me in the mirror reflection, I noticed. His eyes watching me delightedly made me nervous. When I was done with the strop, I placed it on his dresser and looked up at him. If I had not looked up so suddenly I would have missed him smiling gently. Why had he been smiling? I wonder....

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

I smiled to myself, knowing she was alright. Even though she would probably be upset if I told this to her, I found it attractive that she had gotten lost in her own thoughts. I watched her. She really did know what she was doing. I was impressed by her knowledge of shaving. It only made me even more attracted to her. It made me think of how she would make a really suitable wife to a very fortunate man one day. I hoped to be that man.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I had previously filled a bowl with water. I wet Mister Burke's face before preparing the shaving cream. Afterward, I wet the shaving brush, shook the excess water in the bowl and lathered his face with shaving cream. Standing behind him, I then took the straight razor in my hand and looked in the mirror in front of me to see his reflection. I gently shaved his neck and face in short, upward strokes.

He seemed to enjoy the experience. “I have never been shaved by a woman before,” he stated. I stopped and looked up at his eyes in the mirror's reflection. He went on to correct himself. “I did not mean that rudely, I simply meant that this is a new experience for me.” I went back to shaving him.

“Where did you learn how to shave?” He asked. I thought about the man back in my hometown who had taught me how to shave. “A man back home asked me to help him in the barber shop he owned. While I was working there, he asked me if I would shave him. He said he was getting older and he was tired of doing it. He taught me how to shave his face and even paid me to do it privately, just for him. I shaved him often before I left to come here.”

Mister Burke looked unsure. Was he concerned about the man I had just spoken of? “The man is an older gentleman. He and you are the only ones I have ever shaved,” I said, giving him a gentle smile. I presumed Mister Burke enjoyed the thought of the man being older. It seemed he felt special knowing I had no romantic ties to the older gentleman I spoke of. Knowing that he was also privileged to be privately shaved by myself gave him the sly smirk that was now on his face, no doubt.

With each upward stroke I took with the straight razor, I could hear the sound of the straight razor scrape against his beard. The gritty sound reminded me of home. Whenever I shaved the older man back home, the same sound was made when I used the straight razor against his beard. I rinsed off the razor as I went along. Mister Burke sat there silently and watched me through the reflection. He seemed impressed as well as amused. I tried to avoid his eyes in the reflection. They bore at me so intensely.

When I was all done, Mister Burke wiped his face with a clean towel and admired what I had done as he looked at the result in the mirror. “This is the best shave I have ever received by anyone. You were very gentle and precise. There are no nicks, nor is there any blood at all. You have done an exquisite job,” he said, looking at my reflection.

“I told you that you would wonder where I had been all your life,” I said, smiling. He turned around to look at me. He then smiled and said, “You were right. I might just have to keep you around.” His handsome eyes bore at me again. If I was not careful, I could almost fall into them. The thought suddenly made me nervous. I quickly wished him a good night and grabbed all the shaving supplies to put them away.

“Good night Roselyn,” he replied. I headed toward the door to leave his bedroom. I looked back to find him looking at me in admiration. He then turned to look at himself in the mirror and admire the 'exquisite job' I had done shaving his face. I quickly left and headed toward the bathroom. After I had cleaned the bowl and put all the shaving supplies away in the bathroom, I headed downstairs to do another task I promised him I would do.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

The next morning I awoke to thoughts of Roselyn. I remembered the night before she had shaved my face. She was talented and I admired her for her skill. When she had made slow, upward strokes to shave my face, I felt a connection to her. She had been so close to me. She had been in my room for the first time since she had been here. It was something I could get used to.

When I went downstairs for breakfast, it looked like Roselyn was making porridge. “Good morning,” Roselyn said as she looked over to me. From the looks of it, breakfast was almost done. “Good morning,” I kindly replied. I sat down and she served me breakfast. She then sat down in front of me to eat.

I noticed my shoes were polished near the front door. I smiled to myself. She had kept her word. She was proving to be a respectable house guest and it would be beneficial if she would stay. How on earth was I ever going to get her to stay here with me permanently? An idea came to mind. I hoped it would work.

“I have a proposal for you,” I stated. She looked up from her bowl of porridge. “What would that be?” She asked, looking up at me with a sort of smile. She had a sort of flirtatious look in her eyes. Was I imagining it? Her smile faded and I realized she was waiting for a reply. I cleared my throat.

“If you remember, the first day we met, I told you that you could stay here for free, as long as you would like to, as long as you took care of things around here. That offer still stands. You have proven to be obliging and have kept your end of the agreement so far. I rather enjoy having you around, needless to say. It would give me great pleasure if you decided to stay here, with me.” I waited for her to reply but she said nothing.

I realized I had not told her about the raise in her pay. I then added, “You will be paid fifteen dollars a month instead of ten. Does that seem reasonable to you?” She still remained silent on the matter. She stared in front of her in thought. She then looked up at me and replied, “That sounds like a reasonable offer Mister Burke-,” she started. “Please, call me Derek,” I said, interrupting her. She paused for a moment, gathering her thoughts. “That sounds like a reasonable offer Derek, however, as I have told you before, once my business here is done I will be heading home.”

Her words brought torment to my ears. I did not want her to leave me here all alone again. All alone, without her was devastating to think about. “I would be willing to come up to twenty dollars a month if it would please you more,” I offered her desperately, hoping she would change her mind. ”I am sorry, but I must decline your offer.” She stated.

I sat there, silent. I could not say anything. My heart was too fragile. I had tried to make my offer to her. I had just poured my heart out and I had nothing left to offer her. “It is not the money...,” she finally said, trailing off. “Then what then?” I asked, eager to know. She looked at me seriously. “That is none of your concern,” she replied in a serious tone.

Why is she doing this to me? I know she is entitled to leave, but to let her just leave when the time came would devastate me. I could not bear the thought of it. Was there any hope of her staying at all? “Just think about it for now. I would be honoured if you would change your mind.” She thought for a moment, then nodded silently. Her nod told me that there might be a chance she would stay.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I realized he was not only asking and trying to encourage me to stay, he was begging! He was doing his best to try to persuade me. I did not want to hurt his feelings. I told him I would be leaving after all this was done. He was deliberately trying to keep me here, prisoner to his beck and call. I smiled to myself about the last thought. I was only kidding with myself; not that I was going to let him in on my little joke.

I looked up at him. He looked down at me. His eyes were eager; desperate some how. It dawned on me how desperate he must have felt when he thought I had left him for good when I went to find Jack. Something told me that Mister Burke, or Derek, had gone looking around town, asking about me. I needed to know.

“When I left without telling you where I was going, did you go looking around town for me?” His eyes widened slightly, then softened. He turned to his left and faced his head downward. He then raised his head up again and looked at me and said, “Yes.” He did not want me to know, I realized. He did not want to admit his eagerness to make me stay and to have me by his side.

He had been very thoughtful to be so concerned about me. I smiled gently at him. The worry of him bearing himself to me was lessened, as his eyes softened when I smiled at him. I had no clue why, but something told me to be kind to this man; to let him know that I was not disturbed by what he had done. He smiled gently in return; however, his smiled faded quickly when we both heard a distant scream.

It sounded like a woman. It was followed by some more sounds of distress. We both looked at one another, wondering what all the commotion was outside. A short moment later, there was someone pounding at his front door.“What on earth?” Derek asked confused. Another loud pound came from the door. He walked toward the door to see what the matter was. He then decided to grab his gun near the front door before opening it. He took the gun out of the holster, cocked it and started to slowly turn the door handle.

I stayed behind him at a distance. He opened the door slowly and cautiously peered out. “Bill?” He asked, confused. He opened the door wider; I could see an older-looking man in his forties standing at the door with a distraught look on his face. The man never noticed me, or else he was so eager to talk to Derek that he did not pay any attention to me. “Deputy Burke! Thank God!” The man said in a worried tone.

Derek uncocked the gun and faced it downward, taking his finger off of the trigger. The man did not notice and went on. “You need to come now at once! Quick! Grab your gun!” The man rambled on frantically. “Slow down Bill. Now tell me what is wrong.” Derek said trying his best to calm the man down. With eyes wide, Bill exclaimed, “ The bank is being robbed!”

Chapter Text

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

“Ah ha ha ha! And right after that the robber begged for his life like a little sissy! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!” Came a hysterical laugh from one of the older drunken men in the saloon. When he calmed down he went on. “Do not shoot! Do not shoot!” The man tried to mimic the robber from earlier on in the day, using his version of a horribly imitated high-pitched voice. He slapped his thigh as he went on laughing. Many others followed in laughter.

I looked around at everyone laughing. They were many of the same people who had commended Derek earlier on for saving the day. Many of them witnessed the attempted robbery first-hand. From what I gathered from all the stories, Simms was already trying to negotiate with the robber so no one would be hurt. Derek startled the robber by entering through the bank's back entrance, coming up from behind him, and putting a gun to the back of his head. The robber dropped his gun, put his hands up out of fear, and yelled, “Do not shoot! Do not shoot!”

The robber was arrested and then taken to a jail cell in the sheriff's office. It was the same cell that I had previously seen when I went to question Derek days before. I had stayed in Derek's house while all this was going on. Not too long after that I had heard faint cheering and seen Derek walking behind the robber who was being escorted by Simms, who had arrested the man. Derek was pointing the gun at the man as Simms escorted the man out of the bank. It was all quite thrilling.

This was Derek's time to be recognized. It was because of him that the robber was caught off guard and no one was harmed. People around us were patting him on the back before they left the saloon for the night. Among them was Bill. I looked to my right at Derek whom was beside me. I smiled at him. He looked at me with a handsome smile on his face. For that moment he looked at me, it felt like no one else was in the room, just he and I. We understood one another. I was proud of him. He faced danger and used a smart tactic by sneaking up on the robber. Brave.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

Lucas had complimented me earlier for stopping the robber and saving the day. I had received many free drinks from the townsfolk, even passing some on to Roselyn. When everyone had left both Roselyn and I alone, I turned to her. We smiled at each other in silence for a moment. “I am impressed,” she finally told me. Even after all the cheering and the compliments throughout the day, I really admired the fact that I received her recognition. Hers was the best compliment of all. Even if no one had noticed my efforts, her compliment would have been enough.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

The next day there had been some talk about the robber being part of the notorious gang that had been robbing different towns recently. I had also heard a rumour that Jack had been spotted with a group of notorious men of the same likeness and reputation. I wanted to know if it was true. I headed over to the sheriff's office to talk to the man who had attempted to rob the town's bank the previous morning. I walked in and turned to my left to find the robber in the jail cell in front of me. He seemed to look my way and became interested in me once he noticed me.

When Derek saw me, he greeted me warmly and asked, “What brings you here?” I whispered to Derek, “I thought I would come and check out this bank robber I have been hearing of. I have a few questions for him.” I looked at Derek and waited for him to speak, but he did not. He remained silent and looked into my eyes. It seemed whispering in his ear made him avid, somehow. His attraction to me had certainly grown. After a short moment, he replied in a hushed tone, “I have tried getting information out of him. He will not talk.”

He seemed let down that his efforts to make the man talk were in vain. I went up to his ear again and whispered, “Let me try.” He again looked at me avidly. I turned around to see the man in the jail cell looking at me from behind the bars. He had his hands wrapped around the cell bars. “So this is the notorious bandit that I have been hearing about,” I said walking up to the man slowly.

The man looked me up and down now that he could get a good look at me. His wandering eyes finally landed on mine. “You are awfully attractive,” the robber stated after a moment. It was almost like he could not contain himself; he had to say it. “Why thank you. You know, you are not so bad looking yourself, Mister...?”

“Evan, Evan Carlson. What might your name be?” I did not want to tell this man my real name. I quickly told him, “Rose.” Evan smiled. He seemed to find me very attractive. He did have a handsome smile. It was too bad he took the wrong road in life. He had light skin that was tanned, dark brown hair, light brown eyes and stubble. He looked to be about thirty-four or so.

I needed this man to give me answers to some questions, so I thought of a way to get him to start talking. “Something about a bad man just gets me all worked up,” I said flirtatiously to Evan. He smiled at my false statement. He took the bait. “I would love to know all of the details about your attempted robbery,” I added. “Well, certainly...,” he said, but realized then that Derek was still in ear shot.

I looked at Derek. He looked quite uncomfortable with the fact that I was pretending to flirt with Evan. Did he not realize I was only acting to get information from Evan? I thought I had made that clear to him. Maybe he knew, but was uncomfortable with the fact that I was pretending to flirt with Evan instead of truly flirting with Derek. Well we needed the information from Evan so I was not going to blow my cover now.

“Mister Deputy, sir, may I have a private word with Evan here? I would be so gracious if you would give us a few moments alone if you do not mind,” I said. Derek did not seem amused. He seemed to detest the very idea. “I am not leaving the building. I will wait a few minutes at the sheriff's desk,” Derek replied. He started to walk down the hall, then looked back at me. “Do not get too close to him Miss Rose. He is a dangerous man,” Derek warned.

He then continued down the hall and sat down in the sheriff's chair since Mister Wilks was not in. Derek kept his eyes on us and his ears perked. I looked back at Evan. He went on to tell me about what happened when he attempted to rob the bank. “Unfortunately, the Deputy showed up and startled me from behind with a gun pointed to the back of my head. I had no choice but to surrender. Like a man, I bravely surrendered and the sheriff lead me here.”

I knew he was lying about the last part. I had heard that he begged for his life out of fear of having his head shot from Derek. “You begged for your life,” Derek taunted Evan, coming up beside me. He passed me on my left and sat back down in his proper chair. He was jealous, I realized. He was well aware that I already knew the truth, yet he deliberately humiliated Evan. He had to put the truth in Evan's face. I suppose the man deserved it.

I turned the whole situation around by pretending to defend Evan. I turned to Evan. “Oh! You poor thing! That must have been terrifying! A gun to the head, how dreadful,” I said to Evan. I looked to my left at Derek. “You leave Evan alone now,” I demanded falsely. Derek looked at me confused. He could not understand why I was defending Evan.

I turned to Evan and said, “I wanted longer with you, but I can tell the deputy is getting impatient. I shall come back to visit you tomorrow. Too-ta-loo.” I smiled and flirtatiously waved my fingers goodbye at Evan to pretend I cared about him. He smiled. “See you tomorrow Ma'am,” he said.

I turned to leave. Derek's eyes flashed wildly, then narrowed in disgust. Jealousy was coursing through his veins. “See you tomorrow Deputy,” I said, nodding my head once out of respect, pretending like I was not associated with Derek. His eyes softened. I left out the door. I could feel Derek's detestable glare. He could not stand the fact that I had anything to do with Evan. Well, he was not going to like what I had planned for the next day then.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

The thought of Roselyn flirting with that distasteful man made my blood boil! That man had no right to look upon her the way he did! Was she doing this deliberately despite me? She knew of my feelings for her, yet she continued to flirt with Evan; this, this, this robber whom she had never met before. Had she been serious when she told him that something about bad men get her all worked up? Is this what she came here for? To meet up with him because she was turned on by him? Did she not care about my feelings at all?

When she asked to have privacy with him there was no way on earth I was going to let her out of my sight. I kept my ears perked on what they were saying. When he tried to lie to her, that was my last straw. He was trying to impress her and I could not let that happen. I put him in his place.

She had then turned and scolded me to defended Evan! What on earth had possessed her to do such a thing? She then turned to him with a flirtatious smile and told him she was coming back the next day! When she turned to look at me, I gave her a look and tried to warn her not to do this. She was challenging me. I narrowed my eyes at her in disgust.

Do not do this, I thought. My eyes softened at her, trying to reason with her. Did she not read the signs? She continued with her charade. She was stubborn and hard headed! I glared at her as she walked out.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

Later on, I made a pork pot roast. I had to check the meal I had made to see if it was ready. I grabbed a pot holder and lifted the lid. Hot steam poured out. The delicious smell drifted toward me. One of the best smells in the world. Derek was bound to like it. I tasted a bite to see if the vegetables were soft. They were perfect; not too soft, not too hard.

I turned off the oven, then heard the sound of the door opening behind me. Derek was home. I turned around to find him savouring the smell of my pot roast. “What is that delicious smell?” He asked. I smiled. “I made a pot roast. It is ready now, just in time.” He smiled. I dished out and sat with him at the table. I eagerly awaited his reaction to the meal I had made for him and I. “Mmmm,” came a husky and well satisfied tone. That was the reaction I was looking for.

“I was hoping you would like it,” I stated honestly. “Like it? This is the best pot roast I have ever tasted. I love it,” he said, smiling handsomely on the last sentence. I was going to have to watch myself with him. If I was not too careful, I could easily fall for this man. I did not wish to do so. Yet, I had eagerly awaited his approval for the meal I had cooked...especially for him....

After dinner was over I took our dishes to the sink. Derek cleared his throat behind me. I turned around to face him. “I enjoyed that very much,” he said. I smiled at him respectfully. His soft, handsome eyes were getting to me. There was a silence for a short moment. He looked away from me, then back at me again.

“I know you have the intention on going back to visit Evan tomorrow...,” he said. There was a pause, as if he were choosing his words carefully. He then continued. “The display you put on earlier was very displeasing to watch. The thought of he and you flirting together is painful to bear. I do not pretend to hide my feelings for you. Please reconsider,” he begged.

I said nothing. I felt somewhat sympathetic toward him. It could not be easy to watch someone you have growing feelings for flirt with another, falsely or not. Evan thought it was real, and he had been flirting with me. Derek was asking me not to flirt with Evan tomorrow. Or was he asking for me not to show up at all? For a moment, I reconsidered not following through with my plan tomorrow for Derek's sake. I did not wish to hurt him.

On the other hand, I still needed answers from Evan and I was going to need to convince him one way or another to give me the information I needed. It was never my intention to hurt Derek, but I was going to do what I needed to gain Evan's trust. I simply replied, “We need information from Evan. I am trying to gain his trust to get it.” “Is there no other way of doing so?” His eyes were desperate.

I turned around and started to clean up. How was I supposed to answer his question? After a moment, he said, “I am heading to the saloon. Thank you for a wonderful dinner. I would very much enjoy it if you made it again.” After a short moment I spoke up. “You are welcome.” With that, he left.

I felt guilty for planning what I had for the next day. If Evan found me attractive, I was going to use it to my advantage. Unless there was another way to get the information we needed, I was going to have to follow through with my plan. Derek's feelings were going to be hurt, but I would deal with that when the time came. He would loathe the idea, but it had to be done.

Chapter Text

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

I anxiously anticipated that Roselyn might show up here today at the sheriff's office. I dreaded her arrival and what might happen if she did show up. I had hoped that she would respect me and stay away from Evan. For hours I kept looking at the clock wondering if she was going to show up. In mid-afternoon, she arrived, sure enough. My mouth gaped open when I saw her walk into the sheriff's office. I just stood there in stunned silence at what I beheld in front of me.

To my dismay, she came in wearing makeup and a revealing dress. It was a dark, red wine coloured dress that showed off rather too much of her chest. I had not taken her as a woman who even owned a dress! This whole time she had worn pants. I stood there mesmerized by the sight before me, then realized she was dressed that way to see Evan.

“Woo wee!” Evan hollered in delight once he saw her walk in. She smiled at him. “Well, hello there,” she said attractively. She then turned to me and smiled. “Hello deputy,” she said, nodding her head once as she said it.

I just stood there unable to do anything about what was happening. She was going to flirt with him in front of me the whole time, despite my efforts to stop her from doing so. Tension started building in my chest and my throat became tight. I was infuriated and it showed. How could she do this to me? She had purposely went against my wishes.

I noticed that she held something in her hands. It looked like a cloth-type napkin. She presented it to Evan. “I made you a sweet roll. I baked it especially for you,” she said, handing it to him.

“Why thank you Miss Rose. Gosh, you look amazing. Did you dress up just for me?” He asked her. “I did,” she answered. He smiled and ate his roll. He uttered sounds of delight. “It was so kind of you to think of me. That sweet roll was delicious.” “Hmm,” she uttered, smiling. “I have some more questions for you, if you do not mind,” she mentioned to Evan. “Ask away; but first, the deputy will have to give us some privacy.”

I tensed. I wanted to do no such thing. They both looked at me. I looked at Roselyn desperately. Why was she doing this to me? She just looked at me with no remorse.

I reluctantly held my tongue and walked to the back of the room toward the sherriff's desk to sit down. I was fuming, but tried not to create a scene for her sake. They had three minutes to talk before I walked back over there. They were testing me and so far, my nerves were just about shot. My trigger finger was getting antsy.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

Just hang in there Derek, I thought to myself. It was hard to watch him suffer as he watched me flirt with Evan. Derek reluctantly went down the hall to sit in the sheriff's seat again. I did not think I had too much time so I got straight to the point. “What made you decide to rob the bank the other morning?” I asked Evan. “I wanted money. Well, it was more than just money. I wanted to prove something.”

“What would that be?” I asked him. He took his eyes off of me to look down the hall toward the deputy, then back at me. In a low voice he said, “Well, there is a gang of us you see. We would all rob the banks together, just going from town to town. We came across a man named Samuel who eventually became the leader of our gang. It seems he does not like me very much. He keeps saying I 'screwed up', or 'man up', or something like that.”

Evan and I heard rustling coming from behind me. We both looked back to see why. Derek was shifting in his seat. His patience has worn thin...or more like non-existent. He was not going to stay there long.

I turned back to Evan and asked, “How did you end up here?” “I was fed up with Sam always putting me down. So I left a couple of days ago and decided to try it on my own. I wanted to prove to him and myself that I could do it.” I looked down. This has gotten me no where. I am no closer to finding Jack than I was before.

I looked up to find that Evan was looking down at my bosom. “Oh you like what you see, do you?” I asked him. I bent down forward to pull my dress up to my knee. His eyes widened as he watched me show off my leg to his advantage. “I have not been with a woman in years,” he stated. I smiled seductively at him and secretly tried to hide the disgust I felt.

“Have you ever come across a Jack Tanton?” I asked. I waited in anticipation for the answer. “No. Why do you ask?” “I am looking for him. I need to find him.” “Sorry Miss, I cannot help you there.”

I quickly put my dress down and straightened up when I heard Derek walking behind me. I thought I would play Evan seductively. I whispered in his ear, “I wonder if the deputy would leave us both be so we can be alone together.” Evan's eyes grew wide at the mention of it; he looked like he wanted it, like he craved the very thought of it. Derek sat down in his chair as I whispered again to Evan, “Why not ask him?” Derek saw me whispering and stared us down with an angry glare.

Evan stupidly had the guts to ask Derek, “Hey deputy, would you mind opening up this cell so Miss Rose here could come in with me? Her and I want to become more acquainted, if you know what I mean.” “No.” Derek said through gritted teeth, his eyes narrowed at Evan. “Oh come on, cut me a break, will ya? I have not been with a woman in three years. This is my chance to get lucky,” Evan pleaded.

Derek looked away and ignored him. I looked at Evan and grabbed the cell bars. I put my merlot lips up next to him and whispered in his ear. “Aw, that is too bad. We could have had a really fun time together,” I teased. He wanted it so badly. I bet he did not have the slightest clue that I was only fooling him. Derek looked over at us with his eyes narrowed and an extremely jealous look on his face. He kept his eyes on me for a moment.

I went to walk away slowly from Evan and Derek looked away. Evan suddenly grabbed my wrist to prevent me from walking away from him. He then grabbed my hips and pulled me closer to him. My behind was right in front of him! That got Derek's attention. Derek narrowed his eyes again and glared angrily at Evan. Evan held me and looked at Derek to address him.

“Hey, if you will not let her in, I can do her right through these bars! We just need you to step outside for about fifteen minutes for some private time.” Evan went on. He started to lift up the back of my dress a little to show that it could be done. “Stop this!” Derek demanded with a raised voice. Evan continued. “It is that you want a turn with her? We can share her if you like, but I must insist I go first.”

“No!” Derek stated with a raised voice. “Suit yourself,” Evan muttered, undoing his belt then pulling the back of my dress up further more. Derek's eyes looked like they were about to burst into flames. Derek did not take any of this lightly. A look of hatred was on his face. His eyes were narrowed and directed darkly at Evan. I have never seen him like that before.

I wanted to stop Evan and end this. It was just a harmless joke to tease Evan. However, Evan was being completely serious and wanted to have me right then and there. He wanted me so badly that he was willing to share me. How disgusting and pathetic. Derek was not going to stand for it. He looked like he was about to burst a blood vessel. His hands balled up in anger. He bore his teeth belligerently as he glared hatefully at Evan.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

My face grew hot. I had never felt hatred like this before. Any sense and reason was growing very dim, and dimmer by the second. Evan was not letting up. There was no way on earth I was going to let him have his way with her!

It should be me that she tries to impress! It should be me that she dresses up for! Stop looking at her like that! Get your filthy hands off of her! All these thoughts were going through my mind. My hand instinctively reached for my gun.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

Things had gotten out of hand. I went to walk away from Evan to stop all this nonsense. No one was going to have their way with me tonight! Before I could move forward, Evan's hands suddenly reached around me and grabbed my bosom! He pulled me closer to him and started to feel me up.

I broke free from his grasp, reached under my dress, and pulled out a gun that had been clasped to my leg. I swung around quickly and aimed it at him. I stood there with the gun pointed at him. “You ever touch me like that again and I will put a bullet in your skull!” I threatened. “Huh?” Evan uttered, surprised. His eyes went wide and he threw up his hands in surrender.

I looked over at Derek and found him pointing a gun at Evan. Derek looked at me. He was ready to shoot Evan in my defence. It must have been so horrible to watch Evan put his hands on me and talk about me that way. I felt so horrible for putting Derek through all of this. I looked back at Evan to find him heading slowly to the back of the jail cell in fear. What a coward.

I lowered my gun, looked back at Derek and walked toward him slowly. He lowered his gun. I stood in front of him. We both remained silent for a moment; I did not know where to even begin to apologize for what had happened with Evan. Evan then spoke up softly from behind me, asking, “Are you two together?”

“Shut up!” Derek and I both demanded Evan in unison. Derek and I both looked at each other. I know he wanted to be with me. I could see it in his eyes as he looked at me. The intensity of his eyes was almost too much to bear.

A longing for me burned within him. There was also a sadness in his eyes, apart from the longing that he felt for me. I had hurt him. How badly, I was not sure. All I knew was that he did not deserve to be hurt the way he was. How was I ever going to make it up to him?

Chapter Text

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I stood in the kitchen stirring the pot on the stove top after I had gotten dressed and into more comfortable clothing. Derek had come home later than usual for dinner because he had to watch Evan. “I am making stew,” I told Derek. He sat down at the dinner table by the kitchen and gazed at me fondly as I made supper. Maybe he thought I did not notice, but I could feel him watching me.

We remained silent for a while. I was trying to figure out a way I could make things up to him after hurting him. No matter what I thought of, it did not seem to be good enough. I felt horribly guilty. I could not even turn around to face him. I remained as busy as I could so I did not have to look at him.

When dinner was ready, I dished out and served him. I sat down and started eating, still avoiding him. I was not even brave enough to look up at him. He barely ate; he was still watching me. Was he expecting me to say something? I know I needed to apologize. Finding the courage to do so was going to take a miracle. I started off easy. “Do you not like the stew?” I asked, finally looking up at him quickly, then back down at my food.

“On the contrary, I find it delectable,” he stated. There was a pause. “I have never had a stew like this before. I must say that it is by far the best stew I have ever tried in my entire life! Between the pot roast and the stew, I do not know which I love more.”

He kept his eyes on me for a moment, then started eating again. I held the spoon in my hand limply, just staring down at my food. I had to say something. I went to speak, but the words would not come out. “I...,” I started. He looked up at me, which made this all that much harder. Why was this so hard? Why could I not just say it? I knew it was because I was responsible for what happened with Evan.

“Forgive me...I am sorry for what happened earlier with Evan. I should have listened to you. I did not mean for you to get hurt. I simply wanted him to tell me the answers we needed,” I finally managed to get all out at once. He looked at me peculiarly. “Are you sure we needed it? Or was it something you did for yourself?” He asked me. He only made me feel worse.

“It was for both of us,” I said looking at him and answering honestly. “I will tell you what he said to me tomorrow, but for now the guilt I feel for hurting you will cause me to remain silent on the matter for the time being.” He did not say anything after that. He realized I was telling the truth. I was grateful for his discretion.

My head hung low for the remainder of our dinner. I kept my eyes on my food. Every once in a while, he would look up and glance at me. When my meal was finished, I got up and started washing the dishes. Derek brought me his plate and stood next to me for a moment. I pretended not to notice. He then went upstairs to get dressed and out of his deputy uniform.

He came back down in a white short-sleeved shirt and dark brown pants. He sat on the sofa in front of the unlit fireplace and sighed. When I was finished cleaning up, I turned off the water and dried my hands on a clean kitchen towel. I looked over at him. He arched his back and rolled his shoulders once slowly in a backwards motion. “My back is stiff,” he mentioned.

It was no surprise. After all the tension I had put him through, his muscles were feeling the effect of it all now. Guilt decided to keep me company for the time being. It was never going to leave unless I did something to make it up to him. Offering him a massage would help ease him. After all, I owed it to him.

“I know what will help you,” I stated. “Hmm, and what is that?” He asked still facing away from me in discomfort. I still stood there in the kitchen at a distance from him. I looked downward, thinking if I should do this. Yes. He deserved it.

I walked toward him. Should I ask his permission? I thought for a quick moment, then came to the conclusion that I did not think he would mind. He looked back and up at me from the couch as I came up and stood behind him. I took a deep silent breath and placed my hands on his shoulders. I started massaging his shoulders somewhat slowly but semi-firmly. He looked forward and realized what I was doing.

His muscles were very tense. “Is this too hard?” I asked him. He took a moment to answer. “No...it is just right,” he replied slowly. I tilted my head to the left to see the side of his face as I continued to massage him. He was closing his eyes, I saw. He was loosening up and enjoying every second of it. I smiled to myself. It was working.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

“I know what will help you,” Roselyn stated. “Mmm, and what is that?” I asked, trying to relax and get comfortable. She did not answer my question. Instead, she came up toward me cautiously from the kitchen directly behind me. I turned around to look at her, wondering what she was up to. She went behind me and placed her hands on my shoulders. She then started massaging me. Her touch was unexpected, yet, alluring. I was not sure which was more elating; her massage, or the fact that she was touching me.

With every motion, I was beginning to unwind. I closed my eyes and relaxed. The more she massaged me, the better I felt. “Mmmm,” I uttered, the sound escaping me. She was very talented at everything she did. The very feel of her hands on my shoulders was almost...too good. It was almost more than I could bear. Rousing sensuous feelings were beginning to arise into sensual ones. After several moments, I realized that if she kept on going, her touch was going to have another affect on me.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

“Mmmm,” Derek moaned out huskily in pleasure. After a few moments more, his hand suddenly grabbed my left hand gently. “That is fine,” was all he said. He wanted me to stop. I did not understand why. I thought he was enjoying it. “You did not like it, did you?” I asked concerned. “It was perfect,” he replied.

I was unsure, saddened by the thought that he had not enjoyed himself and that I had somehow displeased him. I looked down and away from him at the thought. “Then why do I feel that you are hiding something?” I asked him. He removed his hand from mine and turned around to face me. “I promise you, I enjoyed it very much. In fact, I enjoyed it so much, I feel much better now.” He smiled to show that he was being sincere. He went on. “You are very good at all you do. You cook, bake, clean, shave, massage.... Is there anything you cannot do?”

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

Her expression suddenly changed. She looked away from my gaze and looked downward. “I cannot stand when people mistreat others,” she said, sounding somewhat melancholy. She then looked back up and met my eyes. “I really am sorry for how I mistreated you,” she added. She then turned to her right and headed for the stairs.

Something was off. There was something definitely wrong. She was trying to retreat. I stood up and went after her. She had reached the stairs and started climbing the first couple of steps. I grabbed her left arm gently and she stopped. She slowly turned around to face me, yet held her head low, looking down toward the ground. To my astonishment, there was a single tear streaming down her face.

My heart was grieved. What on earth had made her so sad? “Roselyn, why are you crying?” I asked her, becoming worried about her. She then looked up at me with tear-welled eyes. I could not bear to see her like this. “Come here,” I said. Still holding her hand, I motioned for her to come down to me.” She complied and slowly made her way down.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

“Please tell me what is wrong,” Derek pleaded. His eyes were desperate and saddened. I knew it was hard on him to see me cry like this. I did not mean to cry. I always tried to hold it in around him. Even after I had hurt him as badly as I did, he still came to my side to be there for me.

I looked up at his handsome face with tear-welled eyes. I fought to hold the tears back. I did. I really did. However, when he asked me what was wrong, I could not keep the feelings I felt bottled up inside me, no matter how hard I tried. I tried my best to answer him, saying, “I hurt you. I know I hurt you; I can see it in your eyes. Yet here you are, standing there, being concerned only about me. You do not need to be so kind to me. I do not deserve it.”

He took in what I was saying, and for a moment, he said nothing. After a moment of gazing at me fondly he stated, “You recognized that you hurt me, you humbled yourself, and now you feel horrible about it afterward. This tells me that you were serious about your apology. That is precisely why you deserve it,” he stated. I looked down and away from his gaze.

He placed his finger under my chin and tilted my head upward to look at him. He looked at me earnestly and said, “Thank you for the apology. I forgive you.” There was a kindness in his eyes. His handsome eyes. They bore into me. The way they touched me was unreal, like a dream. No man had ever made me feel like he completely understood me; no man, except my father.

A tear rolled down my cheek slowly. Derek wiped it away with his thumb. We gazed into each other's eyes in silence. “I really did enjoy the meal you made,” he said gently after a while, then smiled subtly. His eyes were kind, but sincere. I hinted at a smile. He had made me feel much better.

I then thought of another way to help him. He would surely thank me in the morning for it. “I will draw a hot bath for you if you wish. The heat should help ease your muscles so you will sleep more soundly.” He looked at me with softened eyes, revealing a hidden smile. A sudden smile spread across his face, revealing I was right. “I would like that,” he replied. I smiled in return.

“There is a batch of sweet rolls that I made in the kitchen. Help yourself while I prepare your bath. He hesitated. “You did not think I made them only for Evan, did you?” I asked. He remained silent. He did, I realized.

“Thank you,” I said simply. He went on to say something, but remained unable to utter a word when I kissed him on the cheek. He just stood there looking at me, stunned. I smiled at him. His eyes followed me as I went up the stairs to start his bath.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

I could still feel her lips on my cheek as she walked up the stairs toward the bathroom. She had kissed my cheek so suddenly. She had thanked me in doing so. Was there more to her kiss that she wanted to reveal to me? Did this mean she was staying with me? I did not know, but I wanted to find out.

I headed over to the kitchen and saw some sweet rolls covered on a plate that I had not paid attention to before. I smiled. Here I thought she had forgotten about me and had made it only to impress Evan. I was jealous when she only offered him one and not me. She had me worried. After all I had been through with Rebecca, I thought Roselyn was acting the same way tonight. I was scared that she was truly going to offer herself to him. It still had me worried.

I finished my sweet roll just as the water from the tub stopped running. My bath was ready. I headed upstairs to find Roselyn coming out of the bathroom. “It is all set,” she said. I looked in the bathroom to find the tub filled with very warm water. “Thank you,” I told her. I headed into the bathroom. “Good night,” she said. I turned around and wished her the same. “Good night.” I started unbuttoning my shirt before I closed the door as she made her way down the short hallway to her room.

I hung up my shirt and noticed that she had reached her door. I was about to close the door to get undressed when she looked back at me, watching her. She noticed me without my shirt on. For a short moment, we glanced at one another. She then made her way into her room and shut the door behind her. I closed the bathroom door. How I wished I could have had the pleasure of her company. I wanted it. Oh, I wanted it.

Chapter Text

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

I sat there in the warm bath and tried my best to relax. I rested my arms straight along the bathroom ledges along side me. I sunk down deeper into the tub to relax. Roselyn was right. The warm water was very relaxing. Especially after the hard day I had earlier on.

Seeing Roselyn today reminded me of how Nova started out the way she did. Roselyn had made a comment about her being turned on by a bad man, and it still had me very worried. It made me think that she might have been half serious with Evan. Had she been serious? Is that why she does not like authority?

She had sounded so convincing that I thought she was going to turn out like Nova. I thought I was going to lose Roselyn to Evan. She had dressed up to impress him. Why would she dress up like that for him? A man like that did not deserve a woman like Roselyn! It made me very angry that she would do such a thing.

The dress she wore was very revealing...I could not help but be jealous of Evan. However, the way she looked...I could not help but be attracted to her. She had looked like a lady, all fancied up the way she was. The way her hair was partially tied up and hung down attractively. The way the makeup complimented her beautiful features. The way her dress draped over her body. The way it revealed her...feminine qualities....

I suddenly found my hand wanting to wander, but I suppressed the feeling and remained still. I wondered if any man had ever touched her. Has she ever lain with a man? This made me realize that I did not know Roselyn as much as I wanted to. The thought of any other man placing their filthy hands on her made my chest and throat tighten. She had not mentioned being with any other man the whole time I have known her. This gave me some comfort.

When Evan had put his hands on her the way he did, I could not take it anymore. I wanted to kill him! If Roselyn had not stopped him and pulled out that gun, I do not know what would have happened. A lawbringer could have been on the other side of the law in that moment. In a matter of a few moments, I would have gone from being a deputy to a man who wanted another dead! I did not care what would have happened to me; I just wanted to make sure that he was not going to touch her!

What would have happened if I had left the sheriff's office to give them some more privacy like Lucas did with Roselyn and me? Would she have allowed Evan to have his way with her to get more information? The tightness returned at that thought. How far would she have gone to get the information she wanted? That thought absolutely terrified me. I was supposed to be relaxing, but instead, all this had made me very anxious. My hand covered my eyes from all of the stress; I tried to block out those horrible thoughts. Instead, I tried to relax and just focused on Roselyn's smile.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

In the morning, Derek grabbed a couple of sweet rolls for breakfast. “Mmm,” he uttered with sounds of pleasure escaping him as he chewed them. I smiled to myself to know he was enjoying them. He left quite early in the morning due to Evan. I imagined Derek would arrive home later again in the evening as it was the night before.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Derek did arrive, he walked in the door, closed his eyes, and smelled the air in delight. “I made apple pie. I wanted to make something special for you to help make it up to you for last night,” I stated. He looked at me, astonished. We sat down and ate supper, then had pie for dessert. He must have complimented me three times for what I had prepared for him. “It reminds me of my mother's apple pie,” he mentioned.

I hesitated at what he had said, but tried my best not to reveal it to him. When he mentioned it, it made me nervous all of a sudden. He was comparing me to his mother. He enjoyed the delicious things I have made for him; I understood that. However, once he mentioned his mother, it made me think that he was thinking about me in a different way. I studied his face as he looked at me after he said it. I could see the truth behind his eyes. It only confirmed what I felt that he meant.

He wanted me to stick around much longer than I had intended; that I already knew. How much had his feelings grown for me? It almost sounded as if he wanted me to stay permanently! Maybe I was simply overthinking things on that matter. To me, it still seemed as though he was hinting at more than what he was saying.

There was a silence between us. I got up and grabbed the dishes to take them to the sink. I started to wash them when I noticed Derek was watching me. After a long moment, he got up and went upstairs to get changed like he always did after work. When he came back down, I noticed that he was walking slower than normal. He was looking down, as if in deep thought about something. He then looked over at me and noticed me watching him.

He came the rest of the way down and sat at the dinner table again. I had one more dish to go, then I dried my hands. I turned around and found him looking up at me. It seemed he was waiting patiently for me. “I have been meaning to talk to you about something,” he stated seriously with a touch of worry in his eyes. “Please sit down,” he added. I hesitated a short moment, then sat down across from him at the table.

“I must get this off my chest. No matter how it grieves me to say it, I feel it must be said,” he stated. I looked at him and wondered what he had to say. He looked as though he were gathering his thoughts as to say it precisely the way he meant to, as not to upset me. He then proceeded.

“When you were with Evan yesterday, I could not help but be jealous.” I opened my mouth to speak, but he stopped me and said, “Please, let me finish.” I listened intently to him speak. “The way you were around him, it had me worried that you were going to turn out like Nova.” I wanted to say something, but I let him finish. “I thought you were going to offer yourself to him right then and there! It had made me question how far you were willing to go to get the information you were looking for....”

I was astonished at the way he felt. After dealing with Nova all of these years, I knew he had had it really rough. After watching her fall into the way of life she was into now, he was afraid that I would follow in her footsteps in some sort of way. His worried eyes yearned for the truth. His eyes were wildly anxious now.

“When Evan had placed his hands on you...I could not take it anymore! Something inside me willed to do anything I could to stop him. Do you not realize that if you had not pulled out your gun, I was going to kill him?” He asked. He looked at me earnestly; desperately. The very thought of killing Evan looked as if it scared him.

I spoke up to answer him. “It was all an act. I just wanted Evan to trust me so that we would get the information we needed, then I was going to leave. He would have been disappointed, but at least I would have gotten the job done.” He was silent for a moment. He did not seem satisfied with my answer. He still looked confused. He then asked me something that I did not prepare for.

“Has any man ever touched you?” He asked with a more serious tone, but looked as if he feared the answer. I looked at him seriously and replied, “That is none of your concern.” He looked at me more seriously to make his plea. “Need I remind you that you know what has happened between Nova and I,” he stated. He was trying to be clever to receive an answer from me. “Need I remind you that it was your choice to tell me, and that you also have agreed to stay out of my personal business,” I replied.

He looked somewhat aggravated. His eyes then softened. “Please...,” he begged softly. I suddenly felt pity for him. He only wanted to know that no man has ever had their way with me. After what I have put him through, I wanted to ease his torment.

“I am not that easy,” I said simply. He looked at me confused. My answer did not quench his thirst for the answer he desperately needed to hear. The truth was that I would not let any man get close to me all these years after what had happened years ago with Jack. I have lived in bitterness and hatred toward him ever since. I always knew men were attracted to me, but I would never let them get close enough to me to matter.

There were very few men in my life that I trusted. I did not trust any man unless they gave me a reason to trust them. I knew where I stood with Evan. He could not be trusted, but he had at least still told me the truth. The day I had met Derek in the saloon, he was fortunate that I had even let him get close enough to talk to me. With the way I had been feeling that day, it was a surprise even to me that I let him lour me over to him. It was unlike me to make an agreement the way I had with Derek. However, I was desperate to find Jack and had made an exception.

Derek now looked at me with desperate eyes. “I do not understand...” he said. I stood up from my chair, walked to the edge of the stairs and placed my hand on the railing. I turned back to look at him and said again, “I am not that easy.” I then smiled at him, trying to reassure him again.

He concentrated hard on trying to figure out what I was implying. After a moment, he looked up at me with a relieved look in his face. He understood that no man has ever had their way with me. We were both gently smiling at one another in understanding. I then turned away from him and walked up the stairs.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

Roselyn made her way up the stairs and headed into her room. By the way she made it sound, no man has ever had their way with her before. Her smile confirmed that she was untouched and unspoiled. She has never lain with a man. Relief welled within me. Hope of a future with her began to arise. Maybe I did have a chance with her.

Feeling in a better mood, I decided to walk over to the saloon to have a drink or two after the past couple of hard days. I sat down in my corner with my drink in hand and took a drink of my whisky. I thought of Roselyn and realized she had not told me what Evan had said. Maybe it had slipped her mind. I would have to remind her tomorrow if she did not bring it up

I placed my drink on the table. I looked around and realized Nova was here. She noticed me sitting here and made eyes at me, but I paid little attention to her. I just sat there with my hand over my cold drink, gripping the top of the glass with spread out fingers as it sat on the table. The condensation of the glass made me feel alive. It was an all too familiar feeling that brought me satisfaction time and time again after a long day.

I sat back in my chair and closed my eyes, listening to familiar sounds around me. The drunken laughter of friends, Gob placing another order, the pouring of ale, and the sound of a glass being placed back onto a table. One sound I was not expecting was the sound of Nova's voice right beside me. “All alone tonight?” I opened my eyes to see her sitting in a chair to my right. Great. “Yes. Why would that matter to you?” I asked, displeased with the sudden and unexpected company.

I noticed the dress she was wearing revealed too much of her bosom. She angled her chest purposely so I could get a good look at it. I knew she was expecting something from me. As tempting as it was, I tried my best to ignore her. I laid my head back against the seat again and closed my eyes, hoping she would get the hint that I wanted to be left alone.

“I figured I would saunter over here to come and visit with you since you were all alone,” she replied. “Alone is how I would like it to remain,” I bluntly stated. “Oh, you do not really mean that do you?” She asked. She was testing my patience. I suddenly felt her hand making its way up my leg. I opened my eyes and swatted her hand away immediately.

“I am not going to sleep with you! Not ever! Get that through your head woman!” I stated angrily. I noticed some of the customers around us turned their heads and stared at us. Gob noticed that something was up. I looked back at Nova to find her grab my drink quickly and throw it in my face!

Gob hurried over with a clean dish towel so I could clean up a bit. I dried myself off quickly then looked up to find that she had walked out of the saloon door. I was furious! I quickly went after her without thinking. I left the saloon to find her looking nervously behind her. She started going faster as I hurried down the steps after her. I did not know what I was doing. I only wanted to scare her and get after her for what she had done!

“Why did you do that?!” I asked, demanding an answer. I was almost close to her now. She turned around in fright to look at me, then turned around and started running from me. I caught up to her and spun her around. I placed my hands on her shoulders and held her there. She looked afraid.

“Answer me! Why did you do that?!” She started sulking. “You embarrassed me, spoiled my drink, and ruined my evening! Is that what you wanted?!” She did not answer me, she only looked up at me with welling eyes and a fearful look on her face.

She suddenly tried to get away and slipped out of my grasp. I grabbed her left arm. By now, the saloon had almost cleared out and all the customers were staring at the both of us on the dirt street. I turned back to Nova angrily with narrowed eyes. With clenched teeth, I stated to her in a low tone, “I ought to put you in a jail cell!” Her eyes bulged in fear.

“Yeah, maybe I will put you in with Evan, the robber! I am sure he would love to have a chance to become acquainted with you!” “No! No. No. No,” she protested fretfully. “Then what do you propose I do with you? Hm?!” She stopped crying and tried desperately to think quickly.

“I-I-I will buy you another drink. Better than that, I will buy you two! Please do not take me to that horrible place! I would rather die!” She sobbed again. I felt sorry for her. Despite the fact that she had completely humiliated me, I let her go.

She handed me the money. I looked down and saw that she handed me more money than she had previously offered. When I looked back up to decline the amount and offer it back to her, I realized she had run away before I could say anything. Gob then arrived outside and started breaking up the crowd saying, “There is nothing to see here. Give the deputy his privacy.”

Many of the men walked back into the saloon to enjoy the rest of their evening. Some dispersed and headed home. I was left standing alone there in the dim light of the evening. Why would she humiliate me like that? I turned her down like I always have and she still has not let up. Hopefully she will learn her lesson after tonight.

I turned around to head home and shook my head. I then thought of Roselyn. What would she think after hearing all of the gossip about me tomorrow? Now I was worried. I walked home slowly thinking of everything all at once.

I slowly walked up my porch steps, opened the door, then closed it gently so Roselyn would not wake up if she was asleep. I turned around to find her looking down at me from the top of the stairs. She had let her long hair down, just the way I liked it. It waved near the bottom half from tying it up earlier. “I heard raised voices. What was all that commotion outside?” She asked. I did not want to have this conversation right now. However, seeing as it would be better coming from me than by someone else tomorrow, I opted now was the best choice for her to hear it.

“Nova was at the saloon tonight. She would not take the hint that I wanted to be left alone so I told her that I was not going to sleep with her. Then she threw my drink in my face and I went to question her about it. I was angry that she would do such a thing! I do not understand it!” Roselyn stood in front of me now. “It sounds to me like you embarrassed her and hurt her feelings,” she said.

“She knows I will not sleep with her, and yet she persists on it. She is always trying to think of ways to get me into bed with her and I cannot take it anymore! I had to be blunt with her,” I explained. After a moment, Roselyn smiled mischievously. My peaceful evening had been ruined, and here she was smiling at me! “What is so funny?” I asked.

“You have a woman who is begging to sleep with you, and you keep declining her offers. It takes a real man to avoid that kind of temptation,” she said with a smile. I was surprised at what she said. She then looked me up and down, then back up to my eyes. “You are all wet, and you smell like whisky,” she stated. I went to say something, but she interrupted me. “I like it,” she stated unexpectedly. She smiled mischievously again.

I was astounded at her comment. Was she hinting at something? Did she literally like the smell on me? Or was she saying that the smell was good because she wanted a drink of whisky? She left me yearning for answers to my questions as she turned around to head toward the stairs. “I shall throw you down a towel.” She then headed upstairs. Her wavy hair danced when she walked. A smile slowly formed on my face.

Chapter Text

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

After my ordeal at the saloon, I had been so angry with Nova! Yet somehow, Roselyn had somehow managed to find a way to make me smile. She had thrown down the towel she had went to get for me. We wished each other a good night, then she headed into her room and shut the door. I watched her and smiled to myself.

I dried off a little more, then went upstairs to get changed. Her bedroom door was straight at the top of the stairs. As I was about to turn left to pass it and head toward my door, I suddenly had the urge to linger near hers. I wanted to be near her. I stood there watching her door, thinking about what could be. If I could only take her in my arms and place my lips on hers...the night would end in bliss. I lingered there, for only a moment, then turned and headed to get dressed and ready for bed.

As I slept, I dreamt of her....

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

The next afternoon, I stood in the kitchen and tasted some of the soup I had made for dinner. The flavour was just right. The carrots still had a few minutes left before they were fully cooked. I heard the front door open and looked back to find Derek walk in. “Something smells delicious,” he said with a smile. He took off his shoes and
hung up his holster and gun near the door.

He turned around and I smiled at him. “I made chicken soup.” A slight smile made its appearance on his face. “I cannot wait to taste it,” he said with a smile. He then headed for the stairs and went to change. I dished out shortly after.

Derek came down the stairs just in time to sit down before I placed his bowl down in front of him. I sat down across from him. He sniffed the aroma coming up from his steaming hot bowl of soup. He picked up his spoon and dipped it in the soup to taste it. “You really should be a chef, you know. With these recipes, I would be at your restaurant every day,” he said, complimenting me.

I laughed. “Thank you,” I replied. It was true; I loved to cook. I had to learn growing up. I had to grow up quickly.... I had to take care of things. I realized this is the first time I had laughed in a long time. As my focus came out of a deep thought and back to reality, I noticed Derek was watching me. His eyes were looking at me softly. “What?” I asked. He smiled bashfully. “Nothing,” he replied with the smile still on his face. I realized he had been admiring me.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

Roselyn's cooking was absolutely delicious. Every meal and every dessert she made was heavenly. When I had complimented her, she reacted in a way I did not expect. She was usually serious, and smiled beautifully often. However, I had never heard her laugh before. I had never heard such a graceful laugh in all my life. Charlotte's laugh was quite graceful, but nothing compared to Roselyn's. It was music to my ears.

Roselyn thanked me. For a moment, I sat there and admired her. She looked up and caught me gazing at her fondly. I could not help but gaze upon her. She was absolutely beautiful. Something told me she did not realize how beautiful she was. I noticed the men around here watching her around town. She did not seem to notice. I noticed them admiring her.

Evan had sickened me with the way he presented himself to her. He had no respect for her whatsoever! I was thoroughly infuriated at the way he had treated her! Like she was just simply a good lay on legs! To watch him put his disgusting hands on her made my blood boil! I wanted to kill him! If it had not been for her reaction of pulling out her gun, I would have done it....

I had realized how much my feelings had grown for her as I was about to pull the trigger. I did not care about the consequences of my reaction in that moment. I simply wanted her to be free of his...intentions. A man like that does not deserve her! I would have scoffed if it had not been for Roselyn sitting in front of me.

She never noticed the hard look on my face. She was looking down as she ate. My features softened as I gazed upon her. She was absolutely stunning in her blue plaid shirt and light beige pants. She wore her hair in a braid today.

I smiled to myself to behold her lovely features. I finally had to look away from her before she caught me. I ate another bite of soup. Delicious. I looked up at her when she suddenly stood up and brought her dishes over to the sink to wash them.

She finished all the dishes quickly. She noticed I was done eating and came over to grab my dishes as well. I expected her to walk away, but she just stood there, facing me. I looked up at her. “I apologize,” she stated. I was astonished by her statement. What could she possibly be referring to?

She went on. “I realize I have not yet told you about what Evan had said to me,” she explained. I smiled gently at her. “It is quite alright. I know you did not do it intentionally. After you finish, we will talk,” I told her. “Alright,” she replied, nodding once.

I walked over to the couch to wait for her. I waited for only a few moments. She then dried her hands and walked over to me. She sat down on the couch a few feet away from me. She brought her feet up on the couch and placed her knees angled toward her left, facing them toward the back of the couch. She told me everything. Now I knew that Evan was connected with the famous gang of raiders that was going around robbing people. I would have to report it to Lucas tomorrow.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I told Derek everything that Evan had told me. Afterward, there was a long silence as Derek thought about it all. As he was distracted, I thought for a moment about Jack. I needed to leave to see if there was any news of his whereabouts in nearby towns. I needed to let Derek know I was leaving. I had told him I would let him know before I leave town again. I intended on keeping my promise to him.

I spoke up. “I am planning on leaving tomorrow.” He looked up at me with a worried look on his face. “I should not be long. I will leave early in the morning so I can be back around dinner time.” His anxiousness lessened. He still looked concerned. “Thank you for letting me know ahead of time,” he said softly. It looked like he wanted to say something else, but he kept silent.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

I wanted to know everything about Roselyn. What exactly brought her here, where she had come from...would she stay? I knew I could make her happy if she would only give me the chance. I knew nothing about her apart from the amazing things she can do...and the fact that her beauty rendered me unable to move in a single moment.

I sat on the couch and gazed upon her. Her eyes were the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen. At work I would think of her and then realize when I got home that my memory was nothing compared to seeing her in person. Every time I saw her, I was entranced by her beauty. She was so close to me now, yet I felt unable to reach her. There she was, just sitting a few feet away from me, and yet I was no closer to making her mine.

If only I could reach over and take her hand in mine. I wanted to, but I held back. What would she do? Would it be too soon to show her affection? How soon would I be able to show her how I truly felt about her without her pulling away from me? As I thought about it all, she looked up at me. For a short moment I was paralyzed by her beauty. I could not move. She must have thought it odd that I was just staring at her.

Was she appalled? My eyes searched hers anxiously. After a moment, she smiled. I was baffled, and relieved I had not sent her away with my affections for her. I awaited to hear what she was going to say next. “I am quite tired. I have had a long day,” she stated simply.

I gave a gentle smile and thanked her for the information regarding Evan. I wished her a good evening and she did the same. I suddenly wanted to kiss her as she was facing me. The urge was strong, however, I did not have the chance to do so. She got up from the couch and walked away. Slightly saddened, I sat there in thought as I watched her leave.

Chapter Text

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

In the morning I rode early westward to find information on Jack. I left before Derek had awoken. I found a lead and followed it, but came across nothing. It seemed Jack had been spotted several times in different towns, but every time I had gotten there he had moved on somewhere else. I was getting fed up. The time finally came where I headed back to Derek's to keep my word. On the other hand, I was getting close. I could feel it.

When my horse, Cole and I arrived back in town, I took him to the stable at the end of the road from Derek's house. I fed him and gave him some clean water. He seemed unhappy these past days. “Are you homesick boy? I know, I miss home too. We will be going home soon.”

I pat him on the back to comfort him, then left him to eat. When I walked into Derek's house, I noticed he had not arrived home yet. I reheated the leftover chicken soup I had made the day before. I was about to eat alone when Derek walked in the door. He seemed relieved to see me.

“You are back,” he stated gently. “I told you I would be.” He smiled slightly, walked over to the table, and sat down. “I am glad to see you honoured your word. I was afraid you were going to be gone longer,” he stated, referring to the last time I had left without telling him.

I said nothing. I blew the soup on my spoon to make it cooler. I was leaving eventually. He was going to have to face it sooner or later. One day, I was going to be gone, and he was going to have to move on with his life.

I looked up to find him looking downward in thought. His face grew worried and saddened. The look on his face revealed that he was dreading the very thought of it all. He did not want me to leave. I noticed he held his spoon limply for a moment in thought before he noticed me watching him. He then continued eating again.

The thought of it should have made me more wary than I was. The fact that he had feelings for me should have turned me away from him immediately. Yet, I was not too unsettled by it all. Somehow, I did not mind it. It surprised even myself.

The way I looked at men was much different than the way I saw them before Jack shot my parents. Men seemed kind, and gentleman-like, apart from the drunkards who would slur profanity and loose speech. Now, my view of every man was soured, apart from my father. He was a good man; a loving, God-fearing man, and he had loved me and my mother very much. I missed him. All the thoughts made me want to head back home. This is exactly why I had to stay, so I could find the bastard that had shot him!

Derek caught my attention when I noticed him look up at me. “Charlotte came to the office today. She came to invite us both over for dinner tomorrow,” he mentioned, interrupting my bitter thoughts of Jack. It took me a short moment to process what Derek had said. He went on. “Her and Jonathan usually have me over a few times a month. They are very loyal friends,” he said, feeling very fondly of them.

I looked up and noticed Derek speculating for an answer as to whether or not I would enjoy joining them for dinner. I smiled genuinely at him. “That is very thoughtful of them.” He smiled, pleased at my answer. I could see that me taking an interest in his friends meant a lot to him. Normally, I would have said no. Growing up, I wanted nothing to do with anyone after Jack had scarred me for life. Now, it amazed me that I was being so understanding when I was still so bitter inside.

It is wonderful that Derek had such close friends. I did not have any friends, other than the old man who raised me back home. He was my only friend, until now. I had made some new friends here in town unexpectedly. However, it would be short-lived since I was heading back home soon.

These friends that I had met here in town were good people. I somehow felt that maybe I was not good enough to be around them. All I wanted was to kill Jack, and here these people were extending their lives to make room for me in it. All of this was not easy for me. It took every part of me to agree to a dinner in their home. On the other hand, the thought was truly lovely, that Jonathan and Charlotte would think of me.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

I was delighted to hear Roselyn would join my best friends and me for a dinner and a wonderful evening together. She had not spent much time with them at all, apart from meeting them and being introduced to them. If she liked them, maybe it would give her another reason to stay. She would be comfortable here; I know she would. She simply needed to give it a chance.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

After dinner, I washed and put away the dishes. When I was done, Derek stated, “I am in need of a shave.” I turned around to look at him. “If you do not mind,” he added respectfully with a gentle smile. I nodded once in response, saying, “That is fine. I shall gather what I need and be right up.”

He went up to get out of his uniform and into normal clothing. I gathered everything together and headed into his room several minutes later. He sat down in the same chair he had the last time and faced his dresser mirror. I came up behind him and prepped everything. I then started to shave him, starting with upward strokes.

Everything was so quiet, apart from the sound of the shave. I looked up and noticed that Derek kept watching me. It was the way that he watched me that had me nervous. I tried my best to concentrate. His feelings for me were growing. I did not know if I could bear it much longer. How I was going to be able to do this again before I left for home?

When I was finished, I gathered all the shaving tools and placed them in the bathroom sink to rinse them. When I came back into the room to grab the bowl with dirty water in it, I found him inspecting his shave like he had the last time. I grabbed the bowl and noticed that he spotted me behind him as he looked into the mirror. The way he watched me made me very nervous.

I quickly grabbed the bowl and headed for the door to head toward the bathroom. “Good night,” I quickly told him. He seemed astounded at how fast I was leaving. “Good night,” he replied as I stepped out of his room. I stopped suddenly. His reply sounded...desperate. Something told me that he wanted me to stay. I forced myself to move forward. I left without looking back at him.

Chapter Text

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

I enjoyed having Roselyn in my bedroom. As a grown man, I had never had a woman other than Roselyn in my bedroom before. Something about it seemed intriguing to me. It was all quite daring to be alone with her. Although, she had seemed quite nervous as I watched her shave me in the mirror.

As to why she had left in such a hurry, I did not understand. I wanted her to stay longer. I wanted her.... I stood leaning forward in front of my dresser mirror, looking at my own reflection. I sighed silently to myself. I stood upright and turned around to face my bed. Directly in front of me was the wall separating her and me. If only there was no wall. If only there was her and I....

I sighed again to myself. I was starting to become eager for her company. When was she going to realize that my affections for her were not going to go away? In fact, they were growing stronger every day. I laid there on my bed thinking about her. I fell asleep with pleasant thoughts of Roselyn playing in my mind.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

The next day around five, Derek came home from work and got dressed into a dress shirt and pants. When he came down the stairs, I realized he was dressed fancier that usual. Here I was dressed in a casual shirt and pants. “Is this evening going to be a formal occasion?” I asked, speaking of the dinner over at Jonathan and Charlotte's. He looked at me as he was trying to button up the cuffs on his sleeves. “You do not have to dress up. I just figured it was a special evening and thought I would try to look somewhat presentable. “You do not have to dress up to look presentable,” I told him.

He studied my face as to the meaning of my statement. “I meant it as a compliment,” I explained. After a short moment, he gently smiled. “I wish I could change. I do not want to be underdressed. However, I only have casual clothing here, other than the dress I wore...,” I said, realizing it brought back memories of Evan. “There is no need. You are perfect just the way you are,” Derek said.

We looked at each other for a moment. He truly meant what he said. He then picked up a tie that he had placed on of the table. “I can tie that for you,” I offered. I walked over to him and started tying it. He watched me fondly as I carefully followed the steps perfectly. “There,” I said when I was all done. “Thank you,” he said. He then just stood there, gazing at me. “What?” I asked. He smiled. “You amuse me with your knowledge of things,” he stated.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

“I am glad I can amuse you,” Roselyn said playfully with a smile. For a moment, I stared at her with intrigue. Had she possibly been flirting with me? I tried to read her. Her smile faded after a moment as she realized I was still gazing at her. “We should get going,” she said. “You are right. We do not want to keep them waiting,” I replied. I tried to seem as casual as possible, as not to let her know that I had been speculating about the meaning behind her playfulness.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

Why had Derek looked at me like that? He had just stared at me for a moment. “We should get going,” I had said, trying to get his mind off of me. He agreed, and we left to head over to Jonathan and Charlotte's house. They lived just down the road, on the opposite side of town.

Their house was beautiful; the colour was a very light, pale blue. It had blue shutters, with both white trimmings and windowsills. There was a straight walkway leading up to the stairs at the front entrance to the house. The stairs led up to a porch, and there were different coloured flower beds around the home. It all seemed like a dream. It was all too perfect.

Charlotte came out to greet us with a smile. “Hello Roselyn.” “Hello,” I replied with a smile. “I am glad to see you decided to join us,” she said sincerely. “I was surprised by the invitation.” She smiled, then looked to Derek. I looked at him; he had a smile on his face. He was very pleased at all of this. I wondered...had she and him planned this evening purposely together? Did they plan this evening because of me?

She invited us in. Jonathan came to greet us at the door. “Well, hello Roselyn. It is good of you to join us,” he said with a smile. He was handsome and built, much like Derek. Jonathan had brown hair, hazel eyes, and a handsome smile. He was shaved and about the same age and height as Derek.

Charlotte on the other hand was very beautiful. She had long, wavy black-brown hair with green eyes. She was thin, and had the perfect semi-pointed nose. She had high cheek bones with a thin, rounded face and a semi-pointed chin. Her complexion was pale in colour, which contrasted with her dark hair.

They seated us in the living room and gave us some tea and biscuits to start off with. “I apologize. I do not have anything suitable to wear to such an evening as this,” I stated. Charlotte smiled and said, “Oh, that is quite alright. We are simply glad you came. We will not hold it against you.” She had a sense of humour in her tone.

“I told Derek the last time he was here that he should have brought you with him. It beats having to be around two men all the time,” she said with a smile. “Oh, we are not all that bad,” Derek stated with a smile. “Says you. I am the one that has to put up with you two,” she said with humour.

Derek gave a husky, hearty chuckle. He had an attractive laugh. He then looked over at me with a handsome smile on his face. “I am not all that bad to be around, am I?” He had caught me off guard with the question. All eyes were on me now. I needed to come up with an answer. Finally, I thought of something. “Unbearable,” I said wittily.

Laughter came from both Charlotte and Jonathan, as they could see the humour in it. Derek, on the other hand, looked very serious, and bewildered all of a sudden. His playful smile quickly faded. He looked at his friends laughing. He could not understand why they would laugh at such a statement like that about him. When Charlotte's laughter subsided, she said to Derek, “See; she agrees with me.” He looked worried. He then looked at me, his eyes searching for the truth. I finally smiled gently to show him that I was only teasing.

Shortly afterward, we all entered the dining room and started eating supper; wine, with salmon, potatoes, and asparagus. Afterward, we had apple pie for dessert. Everything was completely delicious. I complimented Charlotte on her cooking and baking. Derek spoke up and stated that he agreed, and that he fancied mine as well. He mentioned to them that I was very talented at many other things. He then looked at me with a smile.

After a while, I realized I did not belong here. My smile faded as I watched them. They were all so civilized. Here I was putting on a happy face. Even though I was having a good time with these people, I was cold inside. I came here to find and kill Jack. How could anyone live their lives so perfectly? It seemed as though these people did not have a care in the world. These people had never tasted the sting of pain.

It was nice to have met these people, but I realized there was no point in getting used to them. I had to distance myself from them. After all of this, it was going to be nothing but a happy memory. A distant memory, before I killed Jack like the bastard he was! Right now, all of this seemed impossible. It was impossible to be that carefree when I knew that Jack was still on the loose.

I felt so overwhelmed by all of this. These people were being so kind to me. I had never been treated with such kindness in these many past years. This was all too much for me. I could not stay here. I wanted to leave; to just run away and never look back. I wanted to be carefree like these people and just run away from my problems, as if they had never happened.

It was not fair! My parents were shot by a man who should have been trusted, and here I was enjoying pie with people I barely knew. I could not take it anymore! I felt my eyes starting to well with tears. I looked down and pretended to be thinking about something.

After a moment, Derek chuckled huskily at something one of them had said. He then looked over at me. No. Do not look this way! “Is everything alright?” He asked me. My chest heaved gently, but I tried my best not to show it. Everyone was looking at me now, and if I did not leave, I felt as if I my welling eyes were going to spill over. “I am just thinking,” I said. I had to leave the room quickly. “Where is the bathroom?” I asked. Charlotte told me where it was, and I left to go and calm down. I shut the door just in time to hide the tear that was falling down my cheek.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

When I had looked at Roselyn, she was looking down. Something did not seem right. When I asked her if she was alright, she said she was just in thought. I watched her leave to use the bathroom. Something was wrong. Her face seemed to be flushed with colour. Maybe it was only me. Maybe I had been wrong. On the other hand, I could not shake the feeling that there was something not quite right.

When Roselyn returned to the dining room, Jonathan asked her, “So, how long are you staying in town?” She looked at him and hesitated. “Only a short while. I am simply here for a personal business affair, and then I am off.” She looked at me. My heart saddened at her statement. She was still planning on leaving.

After a short moment, she continued. “I want to thank you both for the wonderful evening. Everything was very delicious.” “You are not leaving already, are you?” Jonathan asked her. She hesitated. “I am afraid I have something I need to attend to. I apologize. I do not mean to be rude.”

“Not at all. We are glad to have you,” Charlotte stated. “You cannot leave this soon,” I added in, pleading with Roselyn to stay. “Hush now; both of you. We must not keep the poor woman,” Charlotte said to her husband and me.

Why was Roselyn leaving? I found it peculiar that she would simply just get up and leave so suddenly. We all headed toward the door. She placed her shoes on her feet. All of them said their goodbye's and she left out the door. They were just going to let her leave. There was something more to what Roselyn was saying. I knew something was wrong, and I needed to find out what it was.

I quickly placed my shoes on my feet, but Charlotte stopped me. “Let her go,” she said. “No. There is something wrong-,” I started. “I know there is. Let her calm down. She needs time,” she said, placing her hand on my arm as she said the last sentence.

Her eyes looked at me intently in seriousness. Was she warning me not to go out? “I cannot just stand here. I need to find out what is wrong.” Despite Charlotte's advice, I left and headed after Roselyn to find out what was wrong. Why was Roselyn heading toward the stable? “Roselyn!” I called after her. She slowed down, then turned around.

I caught up to her. “Why did you leave?” I asked. She did not answer. She simply looked at me. “Answer me.” “I do not want to talk about this,” she said bluntly, and continued walking. I stood there surprised by her actions. I then went after her. “Well I do. I need an explanation as to why you left so suddenly the way you did.”

“This does not concern you!” She said with a serious tone. “Yes, it does! You left my friends after they kindly invited you into their home,” I stated. She turned around and narrowed her eyes at me. “I apologized to them. As I said, it was never my intention to be rude.” “So you think that leaving is not?” She said nothing. She got frustrated and continued walking toward the stable. “Where are you going?” I asked, following her.

She was silent for a moment, but finally spoke up. “I need to get away from here.” I was taken aback by her reply. I just stood there as she continued walking. She was leaving? Why now? No! She cannot leave! I hurried to catch up with her.

“What do you mean?” I asked, terribly worried. “I cannot stay here. I have to leave. I just need to get away. You would not understand.” “Then explain it to me,” I pleaded. “No. You cannot ask me to do that!” She stated, sounding somewhat frustrated. “Please...,” I begged, stopping to get her attention.

She continued walking forward for a short moment, then turned around to face me. “Look, this is something I am dealing with, and I need to handle this on my own. Now, I am leaving. I am getting my horse.” She started walking again. I caught up to her, grabbed her arms gently, and looked into her eyes. “Are you coming back?” I asked frantically, afraid of her answer.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

Derek looked at me desperately as he had asked his question. He was tormented at the thought of me leaving. His eyes were screaming for me to stay. I felt sorry for him. After a moment, I realized how desperate he was for an answer. I realized that even in all my bitterness toward men, I had no reason to be angry with this man. I had to give him some relief. “Yes,” I replied simply.

I noticed that his anxiousness did not fully subside. His eyes still searched mine in a desperate attempt to find the answers he was looking for. After a moment, he released his grip from me. He looked away from me. We both stood there in silence. Something told me that he did not want to let me go.

Chapter Text

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

Why does she not communicate with me? Why will she not tell me why she is leaving? Despite the fact that I wanted her to stay, I had to let her go. I released my grip from her. After a moment, I looked away from her, unable to speak a word.

I did not want to let her go. I wanted to hold her. I wanted to tell her everything would be alright, if only she would tell me what I could do to help her. I could not understand why she was being so distant. She would not listen to me when I asked her to explain her problem to me. I begged her! She refused to tell me what was wrong. How could I help her if she would not tell me what was wrong? Why would she not let me help her? What was she hiding?

I watched her walk away and into the stable. I just stood there, unable to do anything. I felt constrained. What was I to do? She was leaving, and there was nothing I could do about it. Even if she was coming back soon today, she was leaving another day soon. On that day, she would not be coming back.

I slowly walked back to Jonathan and Charlotte's. When I arrived, Charlotte was waiting there for me. “You look lost,” she said. I looked up at her, worried. She saw the worry on my face and told me, “Come in and sit down.” She led me to the living room where Jonathan was. I sat down with my head hanging low. “Well, what did Roselyn say?” He asked.

~.~ Charlotte ~.~

Derek had left so urgently to go after Roselyn earlier. He was terribly concerned as to why she had left in such a hurry so suddenly. When he had returned from speaking with her, it took him a moment to collect his thoughts after all that had just happened. “Roselyn would not tell me what was wrong. She barely said anything. Only that she had to get away and that I would not understand....” I looked at him, trying to figure it all out. I had the feeling it had nothing to do with my husband and I. No. She was dealing with something that we knew nothing about.

“It seems to me that she is dealing with something in her own life. She may feel the need to run away to let off some steam or to simply think about things. She may need some time to deal with whatever is pressing on her heart. She will come around. You will see.” Derek suddenly looked up from the floor at me. “That is just it! She is leaving! Maybe not now, but you both heard her. She is leaving, regardless of my feelings for her. Regardless of anything I have done to try and make her stay.”

He really cared about this woman. I had never seen him this distraught. Although, there was one time several years ago when he went through months of moping. I had a feeling it had to do with a woman, but I have never pestered him to tell me about it. I figured if he wanted to talk to someone, he would do it when he was ready.

Now, he seemed even worse off than he had before. He looked back down to the floor. I studied him carefully. I noticed his hands.... “My dear Derek, your hands are shaking!” I exclaimed gently, concerned with urgent care for him. He looked at himself and realized that it was true. He then looked up at me with worry written all over his face. “I have no idea why....” I looked into his eyes. I realized then that he was falling in love with Roselyn and he did not even know it.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I saddled up Cole and headed away from the town. I was running away from it all. I was overwhelmed by everything. Everyone was being so kind to me. I could not become any closer with those people. After all of this, I would be leaving. I did not want any loose ends.

It was not fair to my parents that I should live a happy life after they had to suffer. While I was here enjoying the company of these wonderful new-found people, Jack was roaming around somewhere out there, free. My face hardened. My eyes slowly started to well over. I tried to fight back tears. I rode faster, away from the town's existence.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

I sat on my couch in front of the unlit fireplace after I had left my friends. I could not understand why my hands had been shaking. Charlotte and Jonathan had been very concerned about me. Charlotte had looked at me intently. She always did have a sense about things. She understood people better than most could. Her talent was astonishing. Earlier, she tried to make sense of things. I knew she was trying to help me, yet, everything still seemed so hopeless with Roselyn.

It had been a couple of hours now and Roselyn had still not returned. Where was she? When would she be coming back? Her actions had me worried. She was not acting like herself. I was concerned about her. All these questions were going through my mind.

Why would she not tell me what was wrong? If she was running away, what was she running from? What had caused her to all of a sudden leave the way that she did? Was she displeased with me? Had I done something wrong? I bent over and buried my face in my hands. None of it made any sense!

Several moments later, I heard footsteps near the front door. I took my face out of my hands and looked toward the door. A couple of seconds later, Roselyn walked in. She saw me turned toward her when she came in and slowly turned around to close the door. How was I to approach her without making her more upset?

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

As I walked in the front door of Derek's home, I saw that he was seated on the couch to my left. He was turned around to face me, with a worried look on his face. I turned away from him and faced the door to shut it slowly in thought. What was I supposed to say to him? That I ran away earlier because some bastard shot my parents when I was nine and I had to get away from the town today because I could not take their kindness? He would not understand any of it. I was sure not going to explain it to him. It was none of his business.

I turned around hoping Derek would leave it alone, but prepared for the worst. He was now standing, facing me. We just stared at each other in silence. Finally we both had to look away from each other because we did not know where to start. Finally, he looked up at me and asked, “Are you alright?” I looked at him in silence, then nodded gently. “Why did you leave?” He asked gently.

I did not want to talk about this. “I told you, I just needed to get away,” I stated. He was unsatisfied with my answer. “That is not good enough. Speak to me,” he stated with a concerned tone. I had just come back after calming down, and now he was making me upset by bringing it all up again. “I have nothing to say on the matter,” I said, trying to avoid him. I started walking straight toward the stairs to avoid any more questions. He started to come around the couch toward me as I neared the stairs.

I started to climb them to get away from him, but he quickly grabbed my arm. “Let me go!” I demanded. “No. I want to know what is wrong.” I refused to talk to him and continued trying to get out of his grasp. “Why are you trying to leave when I am talking to you?” He asked, desperately.

He suddenly let go and I ran up the stairs. “I only want to help you!” He uttered suddenly, sounding desperate and heartbroken that I was running away from him. I stopped on the top stair. It suddenly dawned on me that he was not trying to pry; he was simply worried about my well-being. I slowly turned around and looked at him.

“Are you mad at me? Did I wrong you in any way?” He asked. His tone and the look in his eyes were desperate; he was worried. He went on. “Is that why you rode away earlier?” I tried my best to calm down and be patient with him. He deeply cared about me. After a moment, I gently shook my head, no.

“Then tell me, please...,” he coaxed gently. His eyes searched mine for answers. I needed to try and calm him down the best that I could. I took a deep breath and exhaled. I soothly said, “I am not angry with you. I rode away for another reason that I will not be discussing.” I had an idea that his next question was going to be about his friends and if they had any reason as to why I had left, so I went on.

“I enjoyed the time getting to know Jonathan and Charlotte more. They are very wonderful people,” I said, honestly. I smiled to show Derek that I was being sincere. He was still worried. His eyes bore intensely into mine, searching. I had to look away from him; his intensity was too much for me. After a moment, he responded. “Yes. They are,” he said simply, referring to his friends. I looked back at him. He lowered his eyes to the ground in thought. Then he made his way back to the couch that he was previously sitting on and sat down.

“You are still leaving...,” he said, staring blankly at the fireplace ahead of him. I just stood there on the steps, not knowing what to say. After a short moment, he went on. “Even after what we had discussed...,” he said, then looked over at me. “Why?” He asked, hopelessly and desperate. He looked hurt.

“I told you from the beginning that I was only staying here for a short while, then I was leaving,” I replied gently, as not to hurt his feelings. “I am alone here. I enjoy your company very much. It will not be the same without you. Why will you not stay here with me? I can take on more of the responsibilities around the house if you would like. I can buy new furniture, and buy you new clothes. I may not have much, but it is enough to take care of you, if you stayed,” he said desperately with saddened eyes.

He was making another desperate plea for me to stay. He was making this hard. I did not want to hurt him. “I have a home to go back to,” I stated. “What is there that you cannot have here?” He asked, his voice almost cracking.

I already knew the answer. I thought about the one person that mattered to me the most. Someone I loved very much was back home. They were the only person I knew I could trust. The only one that had been there for me since that horrible day.... I knew in my heart that I could not stay here with Derek, even if I wanted to. After what Jack had done, I could never be with a deputy, let alone a sheriff. Any man of the law would always bring back horrible memories of what had happened when I was a little girl.

I simply looked at him. He was so desperate for me to stay. It almost broke my heart to leave him. Derek was a good man. All he cared about was pleasing me. His feelings for me had grown to the point that I knew all he wanted to do was make he happy. Deep down, part of me knew that if I stayed here, he would make me very happy. Despite my meagre and complex feelings for Derek, I was never going to be with him.

I tried to let him down easy. “When you asked me to reconsider leaving and to stay here instead, I told you that I would think about it, and I have. You have made me a promise not to ask about my personal business. I would appreciate if you would keep your promise and do just that.”

He looked at me, so helplessly. He then looked away from me. I tried my best not to hurt him, but I had no choice in the matter. “Now, if you will excuse me; I am getting tired. Good night,” I said humbly to him. He stood up respectfully and said, “Good night.” Even in his sorrow, he was still a gentleman.

Chapter Text

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

I did not understand it. Any of it! Roselyn was acting quite peculiar yesterday. I was hoping not to have a repeat of any of it today. I still want to know what is wrong. I cannot bear the thought of her being upset. I watched her as I ate my breakfast. Something was on her mind. I could feel it. Suddenly she looked up at me and I pretended I just looked up at her. “I am leaving today, but I shall return later on today. After breakfast, I will finish up the laundry, then hand it to dry and be on my way,” she mentioned.

Every time she said she was leaving, for a moment my heart quickens and sinks to my stomach. I become very anxious and my chest becomes tight. It is not until after she says she will return that I begin to calm down slowly. Now it was going to take me a couple of minutes for the worry to dissipate. “What time will you return,” I asked, unsettled.

“I am not sure. It depends on my findings. I will not be too long.” I looked at her, unsure. I would have to take her word for it. It displeased me when she left. I held nothing against her; only, I missed her. I worried sometimes that she would not return and it was the end of seeing her. My heart felt heavy at the thought. I looked down, melancholy.

Soon after, I headed over to the sheriff's office for work. The of her leaving taunted me everyday; more and more as the days went by. The day that she was leaving was coming closer. It was arriving slowly, creeping up faster than I could ever have imagined. I did not know what to do about it. What could I do?

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

After Derek left, I did the dishes, then washed the clothes. I hung them up to dry. I got ready for my day, then went to feed Cole. I realized that I had not asked Evan where he had come from. Why did this just dawn on me now? I quickly headed over to the sheriff's office to question him.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

Evan despised me. He wanted to be set free. For days, he had been in his jail cell and was becoming more agitated as the days went by. “When are you going to let me out of this tin hole?” He barked. “You put yourself in there, so stop complaining,” I stated. I chuckled to myself so he would not hear it. He sure did not like that. He suspected it, but I acted serious and pretended I had done no such thing. I furrowed my brows at him for emphasis.

I was suddenly surprised to see Roselyn barge up the steps and into the office. She had an angry look on her face. Why was she here? She walked up to me and said, “I need to speak with Evan.” She walked right up to him before I could speak a word.

“I am not playing little, miss nice girl today. I am going to ask you something and you had better tell me the answer,” she stated very seriously to Evan. She went on. “I have heard the man I am looking for has been spotted with a gang of robbers. I need to find him. Since you run in a similar gang, I have a feeling it is the same one. I need to know where you came from so I can find him.”

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

When I walked in the sheriff's office, both Derek and Evan were surprised to see me. I was not in the mood to be pushed around. I needed answers. I briefly told Derek why I was there and walked straight over to Evan. I made an attempt to level with Evan. I explained myself and expected respect in the form of cooperation to get the answer I was looking for. Afterward, Evan looked at me in thought for a moment, then his face hardened. “I am not saying anything.”

My face started to heat up. My chest went tight in anger. He was not cooperating. Now that he knew I did not have feelings for him, he was not as willing to give up the information. I then also realized that maybe he did not want to give up the whereabouts of his friends, as not to get them in trouble. I asked him again, and still, he said nothing. I needed another tactic; one that was going to work. I then threatened to shoot him with my gun.

At first, he looked scared like the coward he was. Then, his face suddenly changed. He said, “You would not dare.” He had the nerve to tell me that he did not think I would pull the trigger! I cocked the gun and aimed it at Evan. “I will shoot if you do not start talking,” I said with a warning.

Derek was getting nervous. I did not care. “Ros-,” Derek started, almost revealing my true name. I looked at him and gave him a warning glare. “Rose,” he said, correcting himself, “Now, hold on. You need to put the gun down.” I was going to do no such thing.

I ignored him. I looked back at Evan with wild eyes, still pointing the gun at him. “Where are they?” I asked Evan again, making a third attempt. He looked more nervous this time, but he still said nothing. Did he truly think that I was bluffing? I was becoming impatient. I shot the jail cell floor beside his feet.

“Yeeeaaye!” Evan yelped out. Startled, he quickly jumped up, then cowered in fear near the floor by his bed. “Jeez!” Derek exclaimed, surprised by my actions. I focused on Evan and the task at hand. “That was your warning shot. Next time, I will not miss!” I threatened. “I do not remember the name of the town,” Evan started in surrender. He stayed cowering in a crouching position, and had his hands up in front of him. Like they were going to protect him from my bullets. He continued, saying, “I only know that it is six towns away, west of here,” he finally gave up.

I thought for a moment. I had not been that far out. I had only gone maybe five towns out, and still, I had not found him. I knew I had been close! That explains it. When I was satisfied, I put my gun in its holster. “Rose, can I speak with you?” Derek said, more as a demand than a question. He pulled me aside, away from Evan.

“What on earth has gotten into you?!” Derek asked me. “He was getting on my nerves! I warned him, and still, he did not listen. Now, let me do what I came here for so you can get back to your job.” “You cannot just go waving your gun around at people and start shooting up the place whenever you feel like it!” He lectured. I glared at him angrily. No man was going to tell me what to do when the man who shot my parents was on the loose! I was going to do anything it took to get the information I needed. If it called for shooting the floor to get Evan to talk, I was going to do it!

I gritted my teeth and went up close to Derek 's ear to whisper to him. “Stay out of my way deputy, or you might get hurt,” I warned. I backed up to look at him. He just stared at me with slightly wider eyes and a shocked expression on his face. I then subsided, knowing that I had gotten my point across to him. I turned around to walk away, then out the door. I could feel him watching me as I left.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I left shortly after. I headed toward the west. I knew that I was close to finding Jack. It was only a matter of time. When I arrived there, I asked some of the folk around town if they had heard anything about Jack, or had seen him lately. I finally ran into a lady that said she had spotted him in town. She said that he had been with a gang of robbers and had robbed their bank two days before, then escaped on horses. Jack had left a couple of days earlier. I had just missed him!

I knew he had to be close by. I asked her which way he went. She said she did not know. I checked the next town over, but found nothing. I was fuming with built up anger. Where the blast was he?! I bitterly left and headed back to Derek's.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

I could not understand Roselyn. Why was she acting like this? She had suddenly grown very distant recently. Even now, she persisted on being distant. I cannot figure out what is causing her to become like this.

It is almost as if she has become an entirely different person! She is hiding something. She has to be! All this secrecy she has created between us was getting to me. Right from the day that I met her, she did not want me asking about anything in her life.

I walked out of work when I was done for the day and looked over at my house. There was no way that I was going to go there and deal with Roselyn right now. I needed time to think. I headed over to Jonathan and Charlotte's house. I told them what had happened. They offered me some much-needed comfort. I ended up staying there for dinner, which I was grateful for.

They knew many of my stories of woe, as did my other dear friend, Gob. Afterward, I went over to the saloon to speak with him and tell him everything that had happened recently with Roselyn. He was a great listener. I told him about how she had been behaving very strangely and distant. I spent some time near the bar, then made my way over to my usual corner to sit down and think. I was reluctant to go home. I knew that I was going to have to face Roselyn sooner or later.

I hated knowing very little about her. I wish she would open up to me! I realized that I was never going to be able to know her as well as I wanted to. She was never going to open up to me. Even if she did, I knew that she was not staying. I have desperately asked her to stay, yet she has persisted on leaving! Everything I have tried to get her to stay has failed.

In my heart, I knew was leaving soon; I could feel it. She had said multiple times herself, that she was not staying. There was no point in setting myself up for disappointment any longer when I knew that she was leaving. I might as well face it; there is no point of getting my hopes up. I should just try my best to suppress my feelings for her.

That thought did not sit well with me at all. The reality of my thoughts suddenly hit me very hard. The thought of her leaving left me feeling empty. I felt so alone as the horrifying thoughts became clearer to me. Roselyn was going to leave, and I could not do anything about it.

How was I ever going to live without her? Anxiety started having an affect on me. My whole body suddenly stiffened. My chest tightened. I suddenly found it harder to breathe! One day soon, I would have to watch her leave. I had no choice. I was going to have to let her go....

Chapter Text

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

After my day earlier on, I had calmed down after being so angry due to not finding Jack. I came back to Derek's and ate something small, figuring that he had already eaten since he was not home. I decided to read a book after I was done cleaning up for the evening. I tried to keep my mind distracted instead of worrying about how I needed to apologize to him for the way I had acted out in anger earlier.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

After realizing that I would have to let Roselyn go, I sat there alone in the saloon, just staring at the floor. Saddened, it suddenly dawned on me that all of this time I had not realized how Roselyn had made me feel so alive again. After what had happened with Nova, I had been so depressed. The day I had met Roselyn, I immediately started smiling more.

Every day, joy had become more eminent. Yet, no matter how many times I have shown Roselyn my feelings, she has not shown any affection in return. She obviously has no feelings for me. If she did have any, she would have shown them by now. She has not pursued me in the same way that I have pursued her.

After a while of wallowing in self-pity, I got up from the chair I was sitting in and paid Gob. I thanked him for everything, wished him a good night, and headed home for the night. It was time to face the truth; I was never going to be happy with Roselyn. I walked home with my head hanging low, dragging my feet slowly in sorrow. No matter how much I wanted her, it was never going to be enough for us to be together.

How was I ever going to face her, knowing that I could never be with her? I slowly walked up my porch steps and stood outside my front door. I sighed silently to myself, then turned the door handle. I entered to find Roselyn sitting on the couch under a blanket, reading. She looked up at me. She looked so innocent. She looked as if nothing had happened earlier. She was absolutely beautiful, the way I knew her to be. How will I ever be able to let her go?

With a heavy heart, I turned away from her beauty to hang up my gun holster and lock the door for the evening. I knew I had to face her, but I was reluctant to turn around. I did not want to fight anymore with her. I heard her stand up. I turned around to see her looking regretful. “I am sorry for what I said to you earlier. It was not right of me to do so. I was angry....” She said.

I stood there is silence, not knowing what to say to her. There were too many questions that needed to be answered. I started simple. “Why were you angry?” I asked, gently. She said nothing. I walked closer to her. I wanted her to start responding to my questions.

“You have not been acting like yourself lately. Why have you been acting this way?” I asked. She still did not say anything. “Why do you hide behind your secrets? Why will you not answer me?” I asked. She looked away from me, unwilling to answer me. I placed my hands on her shoulders. She looked back at me as I looked closely into her eyes. “What has gotten into you? What is wrong?” I asked.

She stood there with an unrelenting expression on her face, then finally broke. “You would not understand,” she finally stated, looking away from me again. Her brows were furrowed. Not in anger, but in seriousness, and a hint of defiance. I let her go. “What would I not understand? You have never given me the chance to understand.” She stood there silently looking up at me with softened eyes. She knew that I was right.

She did not want to tell me. It was another reason why I believed I needed to let her go. If she had any feelings for me, she would open up to me. Instead, she keeps secrets and does not speak a word about her business. I sighed to myself quietly.

“You do not understand. I cannot tell you,” she replied with her face pointing downward, then her eyes looked up at me. It was no use trying to get her to speak to me. No matter how hard I tried to get through to her, she never let me in. I gave up and started walking toward the stairs. I then stopped at the edge of the stairs before going up.

I glanced backward in her direction without looking at her. “Is it that you cannot tell me, or that you will not tell me?” I wittily retaliated with a similar quote she had once asked me. She was silent. I turned forward and went up the stairs for the night. I closed my bedroom door behind me.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

When Derek had walked in, I stood up respectfully to greet him. I apologized. I knew he did not deserve the way I had treated him earlier in the sheriff's office. I simply did not want anyone standing in my way of finding Jack. I took it out on Derek, and I regretted it. Now, he was angry with me because I would not tell him why I was angry. I know he was only trying to help me, but I could not find the ability to tell him about what had happened with Jack.

Derek climbed the stairs, went into his room, and closed the door. I understood why he was angry about the way I had treated him earlier. However, for him to be angry at me because I would not answer him as to why I was angry was not fair! It was none of his business, and he had promised to stay out of my personal affairs. I wanted to resolve all of this tonight, however it looked as if this was going to be dragged on until the next day. I did not want to hear another lecture from him!

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

After shutting the door behind me, I immediately regretted what I had just said to Roselyn. Maybe I should not have said it. It was never my intention to be bitter toward her. I was only trying to show her that I was frustrated at the fact that she would not talk to me. What had I done?

If she was ever going to give me a chance with her romantically, I had just blown any chances of that happening. I supposed it was for the better. If I concentrated on realizing why I had to let her go, maybe it would distract me from the feelings I had for her. Maybe then, I could learn to let her go. Realizing the stupidity of it all, I lashed out. “Aaagh!” I uttered out of anger as I hit the wall foolishly. It made a loud sound, and no doubt, Roselyn had heard it. I closed my eyes and shook my head with regret.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

Annoyed, I figured I would climb the stairs and get ready for bed. I was just about to enter my room when I heard a sudden yell and a loud thud come from Derek's room! I jumped when I heard it. What was that? I stood there, stopped in my tracks, looking over at his bedroom door. Had he done it because he was angry with me? It did not seem like him to do such a thing. After a moment, my nerves calmed down and I entered my room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

I awoke with a start at the shrill sound of Roselyn's voice. What on earth?! I sat up, half asleep, wondering what was happening. “ Nooo!” She called out in a shrill voice again. I immediately got out of bed and headed toward her room. Something was definitely wrong!

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I watched as my parents danced in the living room. They lovingly held one another. I was so happy. Jack suddenly broke in our home! He wanted to kill Pa so he could be with my mother instead. I saw Jack kill my mother in a murderous rage as he aimed for my father. Angered, Jack shot and killed my father. I ran and hid under the bed with my doll Lucy. Jack then noticed me running under the bed before he left. He came over and I screamed out in terror as he looked under the bed and saw me. He then reached over to me and started pulling me out from underneath the bed. “Nooo!” I called out in fear as he dragged me closer to him.

I watched as Lucy laid there on the floor as I was dragged further and further away from her. Now Jack had me. I flipped over to face him. I wanted to kick him, but he forced his hands around my neck and started to choke me! I could not breathe!

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

I hurried to Roselyn's room to see what was wrong. I flung open the door to find her having a nightmare. I went up to her and tried to wake her. “Roselyn!” I said, shaking both of her shoulders. She did not wake up.

I did it again. “Roselyn! Wake up!” This time, she awoke in terror. She looked at me with fear filled eyes and quickly went to grab her gun from the night stand beside us. She pointed it at me with a terrified look in her eyes! I quickly backed away from her and put my hands up in the air. “Wait! Do not shoot!” I pleaded desperately. She held the gun in place as she pointed it at me. I cautiously turned on the lamp in hopes she would put the gun down. “Roselyn, it is I, Derek! I promise, I am not here to seduce you. I only came to see what was wrong. You were having a nightmare,” I stated.

She blinked. She seemed somewhat disoriented. She suddenly realized that I was telling the truth. She lowered the gun. I realized then that she had been crying in her sleep. There were tear streaks running down her face. She looked downward, realizing what had just happened. She had almost shot me!

She placed the gun slowly on the nightstand. She then looked down again and suddenly started welling with tears. I felt sympathy for her and immediately went and embraced her. “There, there. It is alright. It was only a nightmare. Everything is alright now,” I said trying to comfort her.

At first, she was stiff, most likely uncomfortable at the fact that I was holding her. However, after a long moment, she loosened up and calmed down. When I let her go, she looked at me with red-rimmed eyes in silence. She had a softened expression on her face. “What were you dreaming about?” I asked, trying to get through to her. She immediately looked away from me and remained silent on the matter.

I needed to get through to her. “I only want to help you. I am not trying to pry.” After a long moment of waiting for her reply, she finally spoke up. “It does not matter what I dreamt about,” she stated. After a short moment, I gently stated, “It matters to me....” She looked back at me. I lifted my hand to her face and wiped the tears away from her eyes. For a long moment, she gazed into my eyes in silence.

“I am worried about you,” I told her honestly. I placed my hand on hers and looked at her intently. She looked down at my hand holding hers, then looked into my eyes again. “I care about you,” I said gently to her. She simply looked at me for the longest time with gentle eyes. We were so close to each other; so intimately close. As we gazed at one another, I had the urge to kiss her.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I looked away from Derek when he asked my what I had dreamt about. Although it was only a dream, it reminded me too much of the events that happened when I was nine. I did not wish to tell him about my dream; about Jack and my parents being killed. Instead, I told Derek my dream did not matter. He remarkably told me in a gentle manner, “It matters to me....” I looked back at him, astonished at his reply.

He then wiped away my tears. “I am worried about you,” he stated. He then placed his hand on mine and gazed at me. I looked down at his hand touching mine, then back at his gaze. “I care about you,” he said gently. I gazed at him in awe. I knew that he meant it. Why was he so concerned for me? Why was he being so personal? I could not understand any of it.

His hand was still on mine. I had the urge to move mine away from his, but something about the way he was being so comforting made me leave it where it was. It was nice being treated so kindly. It was not something I was used to. No man, apart from one, was aloud to touch me. Yet, this handsome man in front of me had gotten through to me, whether I wanted him to or not.

I suddenly became nervous. He had a particular look in his eyes. I suddenly felt that he wanted to kiss me. Butterflies filled my stomach, as I could see the longing in his eyes. As he gazed at me, ever so fondly, I could practically feel his lips on mine.

I immediately took my hand away from his. “I will be fine,” I stated. For a short moment, his expression revealed that he felt let down because I took my hand away from his. His eyes then searched mine for the truth. He then questioned, “Will you?” I was surprised by his response. His eyes bore into mine intensely. He stated, “You can tell me anything. I am here for you if you need me.”

I was afraid he was going to place his hand on mine again. I spoke up quickly. “Thank you for your concern. Now, I am tired and would like to go back to sleep,” I stated nervously. He seemed let down by my response. After a moment of silence, he reluctantly said, “Very well.” He then stood up slowly and turned to leave. Before reaching the bedroom door, however, he stopped. He then turned around and added, “If you need anything, please do not hesitate to wake me.”

I just looked at him, then realized that he was waiting for a reply. “Thank you. Good night.” “Good night, Roselyn,” he uttered calmly. He walked toward the door, looked back at me, then closed the door behind him. The way he looked at me...so desperately.... The concern that he had for me made it seem as though he did not want to leave. If I had not said anything to him, what would he have done if I had let him stay?

Chapter Text

 ~.~ Roselyn ~.~

In the morning, I awoke to thought of the night before. Derek had been in the bedroom I was staying in. He had come to comfort me after I had awoken him while having a nightmare. His eyes revealed that he had been very concerned for me. He was becoming too concerned for me. I was afraid that if I had not said anything about being tired last night, he may have tried to stay. The way he has been looking at me lately...there has been something more in his gaze. I cannot shake the feeling that there was something more to the way he looked at me last night; something more...intimate.

Would he have tried to have his way with me? Would he have tried to seduce me? I could not have that. The day we had first met, he had given me permission to shoot him if he ever tried to do so. I wonder, now, how serious he was when he had said it. Hopefully it would never come to that.

A few moments later, I made my way downstairs to get breakfast started, only to find Derek standing in the kitchen making breakfast. He looked over at me and his eyes softened. “Good morning,” he said sincerely. “Good morning,” I said in astonishment. Why was he making breakfast when it was my duty to do so? I went to ask him, but before I could utter a word, he spoke up.

“Before I made my way up the stairs last night, I said something to you...,” he started to explain without looking at me. It looked like something was eating away at him. After a moment, he then went on. “This incessant regret I have for doing so has haunted me. No matter how irritated or angry I was when you would not answer me, it does not dismiss my behaviour. I must apologize. I am very sorry for what I said to you.”

Last night, I could not bear to tell him the history of what happened to my parents. When I had told him I could not tell him, he became impatient with me and uttered almost the exact same question I had asked him once. I found it very rude of him to do such a thing. Yet now, here he was regretting his decision to speak that way to me. I could see this meant a lot to him. Concerned and burdened at the thought of his actions, he now waited for my reply.

“Thank you for your apology,” I responded. “You must understand that the only reason I questioned you last night is because I want to help you. But nothing I have said to you has gotten you to open up to me; no matter how much I have pleaded and begged, and it has had an affect on me. I want to help you, but you keep shutting me out.” “You are right. However, the business I have come here for is my own. I do not wish to hurt you, and I'm sorry if I have,” I told him.

There was a moment of silence. Finally, he said, “I made breakfast for us both. It is my way of attempting to make it up to you for what I said to you last night.” “Thank you,” I replied. We sat down to eat in silence. Honestly, I was feeling overwhelmed. I did not want to talk to him about this anymore. My business was my own. I know that he had only tried to help me. I was very thankful for that. However, I wanted to distance myself from him. I needed to get away from it all.

“I am leaving for a bit, but I will be back soon,” I stated. He looked concerned. “Where are you going?” He asked. I did not have an answer for him. I certainly did not want to tell him that I needed to get away from everyone. However, I did not want to hurt him. He had made his concerns known to me, and I did not want to be rude.

“I need to get away from here. I was thinking about riding out of town for a little while to get some air. I...I just need to have a moment to think.” He looked worried. As much as I was concerned for him, I was not willing to stick around to see the worry on his face. I was finished my meal, so I placed my dishes in the sink. I then walked toward the front door to leave.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

I knew Roselyn was still hiding something. Last night she was reluctant to tell me her dream, even though it was something so innocent to ask about when I tried to comfort her. Now, there was something she was not telling me. I knew I had to let her go; both now, and when she was ready to finally leave this place for good. Instead, I have tried to hold her back from leaving. Maybe it was me she was running away from. Why else would she not tell me anything? Even when I was trying to help her.

She wanted to “get some air” she said. I knew the best thing to do was to let her do it instead of holding her back. I had to let her go one day, so there was no point in trying to hold her back now. She went and placed her dishes in the sink and started to head toward the front door to leave. I went to ask her when she would be back, but something in me...something instinctively went against everything and I blurted out exactly what I was trying to avoid.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I passed Derek and made my way to the front door. “I am coming with you,” he stated from behind me as I neared the door. I stopped dead in my tracks. For a moment, I just stood there in thought, processing what he had just said and what my next move should be. Finally, I looked back at him. “Look, I know something is wrong and you are not telling me what it is. It is your choice to tell me, or not. But whether or not you see it, I figure you could use a friendly face to comfort you. If you will have me accompany you...,” he stated.

I hesitated. I had just told him that I wanted time alone to think, yet he persisted that he was coming on my behalf. I looked away from his gaze and thought about it for a moment. I then looked back at him and said, “Alright, you can come. As long as you promise not to pester me about my recent behaviour,” I replied. He gave a slight smile and agreed.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

Roselyn and I walked to the stable together, not saying much. We saddled up the horses, then rode out of the city borders to an area with tall grass, a couple of boulders, and a single tree. We tied up our horses and sat down on the boulders to chat. We talked and laughed for a quite a while. It was something we had never done before. Finally, things got serious when a moment of silence came. She was not expecting it, but I needed to know something.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

“I need to know...did you want to be alone because of me?” Derek asked gently. I looked at him for a long moment, realizing he had sadness in his eyes at the very thought of me wanting to leave because of him. All this that I had been going through, with Jack, and now feelings for Derek that I never wanted, all this was weighing on me. I may have needed space for my own reasons, but it was never because of anything Derek had done against me. In fact, I knew he went out of his way to please me and make me comfortable while I am staying here in town.

“No,” I told him truthfully. He searched my eyes to find if I had told him the truth. It was hard to look at him when he searched me like that. I had to look away from him. There was a moment of silence between us. Finally, he broke the silence. I looked up at him.

“For the life of me, I cannot figure out why you shut me out when all I want to do is be there for you.” He moved closer to me. “You can tell me anything; if, and when you are ready. I will not force you to do anything. I am simply letting you know that I am here for you when you need me.”

I said nothing; I only stood up in astonishment as I wondered what I had done to deserve such a friend. “Thank you,” I finally managed to say. Why did he care so much about me? He then stood up behind me. “You are welcome,” he replied kindly.

After a moment of silence, he went on. “I know you are going through something,” he said, standing close to me. There was another moment of silence. I then went on to explain myself. “If I have remained distant from you, it is nothing you have done. It is something that has happened in my life when I was a child.” I looked away from him. He then moved closer to me, placed his finger underneath my chin, and tilted my head upward to look at him. He looked down at me and said, “If someone has hurt you, you can tell me.”

His eyes lingered on mine for the longest moment, searching for answers that I was not giving him. He so desperately wanted to be here for me. I knew that he had truly meant what he said. This time, I did not look away from his long gaze. Instead, I endured it. I had never felt this close to any man. How could this man's eyes touch mine so intimately when all I have done was push him away?

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

I wanted her to tell me what was bothering her. What had happened to her when she was only a child? Why would she not tell me when I knew there was something wrong? When I had seen her crying last night, everything in me hurt for her. I could not bear to see her cry. I want to be there for her when she is down. To catch every tear that falls from her eyes. To hold her, and comfort her. To kiss her, and show her that everything will be alright.

Something...something in me felt different. A good, but strange feeling in my throat, chest, and stomach came out of nowhere. Something in me suddenly took over, and without thinking, I reached for her hands. I gently took her hands and held them in mine. She looked down at my hands holding hers, then back up at my gaze. She looked up at me in astonishment. Yet, she did not remove her hands from mine. Instead, we gazed fondly at one another.

As we gazed into each other's eyes, I caressed her face gently. She closed her eyes for a meaningful moment as my thumb glided gently along her cheek. I was about to make an attempt to kiss her, but she opened her eyes and headed toward her horse located behind me before I could even manage to make a move. I was left standing there, in need of my lips on hers. When I finally managed to regain myself, I looked back at her gazing at me before getting on her horse. Her eyes were remorseful. She did not mean to hurt me, yet, I was left wanting.

She waited for me to mount my horse to return to town. I headed toward my horse, climbed up, and followed her lead. We rode back to the town stable and tied up the horses. She was finished before me and left a couple of moments before I was done tying up my horse. I could not help but notice that she was avoiding me. However, when I walked out of the stable, I found her waiting not too far off for me. I walked up to her and we walked to my house together in silence.

As we walked together, I started getting this strange feeling again. Something that only Roselyn had managed to make me feel. I have had it lately on a few occasions, but nothing like today. As we neared my home, Roselyn walked up the porch ahead of me. She looked back at me and smiled to show there were no hard feelings between us. Then she opened the door. I watched as she went inside. I smiled to myself and went to follow her, then suddenly stopped. I suddenly realized what these strong and recent feelings were. I realized...I was in love with her.

Chapter Text

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I stood in the kitchen preparing dinner and thinking about what Derek had said to me earlier on in the day. “If someone has hurt you, you can tell me,” he had said, searching desperately for the answers he had been looking for. For the rest of the day, his words kept playing in my mind; over and over again. The way his handsome eyes looked at me...it was like nothing else in the world mattered. All he wanted was to be there for me.

I was completely astonished when his hands had reached out for mine. After a moment, he had caressed my left cheek with his thumb. I closed my eyes; I was in complete bliss. All my troubles were forgotten in that single moment. For any man to touch me was unacceptable, and yet, in that moment I could not resist him.

It scared me. All of it. I had suddenly opened my eyes; nervous that he was going to kiss me. I had to distance myself from him. I could not let my feelings for him get the best of me.

It was only now that I thought about it...that I realized how much my feelings had grown for Derek. My cheeks blushed as I now stood in the kitchen confused. I felt so overwhelmed. I was very thankful that I was now alone and that Derek was not here to see me like this. I have never felt this way about any man before. For a moment, I thought of him and the way he had looked at me with compassionate eyes. I had to remove my hands from his. I could not give into this...into him. I was leaving soon!

I had removed my hands from his before he could make a move. I had not known what to do, so I then headed to my horse and looked back to find him slowly turn around to look at me. His eyes were desperate and longing. I knew he only wanted to help me, yet his eyes revealed that he was not satisfied. I had not wanted to hurt him. It was better that way. I had then mounted my horse and waited for him before heading back into town.

We rode back in silence after the events that just happened. The whole time I had thought how close he had come to getting his way. There was no way I was going to give into him...no matter what my feelings were for him. I was leaving, and that was that. When we had reached the stable I tied up my horse quickly, as did Derek. I avoided his glances/gaze and left the stable before he was done tying up his horse. I felt smothered somehow. I needed to get some fresh air. I walked several feet and after a long moment, stopped to wait for him as he walked out of the stable. I did not want to be rude to him after all.

He caught up to me looking relieved to find that I had waited for him. We walked back to the house in meaningful silence. This man meant more to me than I had ever realized. I had to suppress my feelings for him at all costs. I had noticed the house was not too far away. When we drew near, I walked on ahead of him, then looked back at him before going inside. I hoped he had not felt as though I had actually been avoiding him. I smiled gently at him to show him that there were no hard feelings between us. I knew that he had understood.

Now, I stood in the kitchen peeling potatoes; constantly becoming distracted from thoughts of the events that happened earlier. Derek had shown such kindness to me; kindness I had never known for most of my life. I stared off into the distance, becoming distracted again. Ugh! Why can I not get him out of my head?! The fact that I was becoming distracted like this was ridiculous! So he showed me kindness...why was I reacting this way?

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

All afternoon I had thought of Roselyn. I had invited her to Jonathan and Charlotte's, but she had declined my invitation kindly. I now understood more as to why she was distant from my friends. I did not know what had happened to Roselyn when she was younger, but it was a start. I simply smiled at her in understanding and left her to duties.

I walked toward Jonathan and Charlotte's with a smile on my face. I had never felt like this before. I told my friends how Roselyn had opened up to me earlier in the day. I then told them how I truly felt about her. Something about the look on Charlotte's face when I told her told me that she had already known. Charlotte was always good at reading people. She knew that these feelings were all new to me. I had never felt love for any woman like this.

I kept thinking of Roselyn and I together, trying to hide a smile beneath the surface of my expression. My hopes depleted as I realized that I should not get my hopes up of being with Roselyn so soon. Roselyn had clearly stated she was leaving.... Whether I wanted her to or not, her intentions were to leave this place...to leave me here alone one day soon. She could not leave; not now. I have to make myself known to her, but how? I pondered this all afternoon.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

Eventually, I focused enough to get supper cooking. Sometime not too long after that, Derek stepped in the door. He had been visiting with Jonathan and Charlotte all afternoon. He had invited me along, however, I politely declined his offer. I was not ready for such things. I turned around as Derek walked over to me. He smiled at me handsomely. A strange feeling that started in my chest quickly spread all over my body. What was that?

“Something smells delicious, as it always does. I always look forward to your meals,” Derek stated with a handsome smile on his face. “Thank you,” I replied, then looked back at the stove in front of me. My cheeks became warm suddenly. Was I...blushing? What is wrong with me? What is going on? I could not let him see me like this. I stirred the chicken soup that I had made, pretending that there was nothing going on.

“Dinner is almost ready,” I told Derek without looking at him. “Alright,” he replied. He headed for the stairs and went to get dressed. When he returned, I was just placing the dinner bowls down on the table. He sat down and sniffed his food. A satisfied smile spread across his face. “Chicken soup and dumplings; one of my favourites. My Mother would make this often,” he stated. He then took a bite of his food and froze. His eyes widened slightly.

“Is something wrong?” I asked Derek, concerned. He looked at me, then started chewing again. He swallowed, then replied, “No. Everything is absolutely perfect. Where...where did you get this recipe?” He asked. I thought for a moment. “My Mother,” I replied, saddened. Thinking about her only made me depressed. I tried to get my mind off of her and my Father.

“So, you like it then?” I asked him, referring to the soup. “I adore it,” he stated, then smiled. The strange feeling spread all over me again. This time, I tried not to think about it too much. I do not want to pay attention to any feelings I have for Derek. Thoughts of earlier moments in the day came to mind again.

“I want to thank you for the comfort you gave me earlier. It means a lot to me. More than you know,” I told him. His eyes softened and he smiled gently. “I am glad that I was able to be there for you. You opened up to me, and that is all I want is to be able to be here for you,” he said, his gentle eyes gazing at me intensely. I had to look away from him. I looked down at my food, blew on it to cool it, then took a bite.

The way he was looking at me was too much to handle. It was very personal; he has become more and more personal lately. I suppose I already knew why. His feelings have grown stronger for me lately. I watched as he enjoyed his meal; practically gobbling it down. It seemed he could not get enough of it. I smiled to myself. I am glad he enjoyed it.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

When I reached home, delicious smells wafted my way. The smell had been all too familiar, so when Roselyn had placed dinner in front of me and I found out what it was, I was delighted. What I had not planned on was that hers tasted exactly like my Mother's! The meal brought back memories of my childhood. I could not believe that this woman, Roselyn, had just made the same soup that my Mother always made. I kept this information to myself, as not to make Roselyn uncomfortable. I relished in every delectable bite.

When I looked up at Roselyn again, she had her head down. "Roselyn, what's wrong?" I asked. She looked up at me. Something was troubling her. I could see it on her face. I went to reach for her hand, but she removed it quickly from the table before I could reach it/her and looked down in silence. No! I did not want her pulling away from me and being distant again. After the progress we made earlier today, I did not want her to shut me out again.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

I had opened up so much today.... About my past, about how I felt.... Only one other man knew all my secrets; knew everything that had happened when I was a child. Why had I suddenly opened up to Derek today? For years, I have kept silent and pushed everyone who got too close to me away. Everyone, apart from the one man who knew me so well. Now, Derek knew more than he should have.

I thought of my parents and that horrible day. I missed them both so much. "Roselyn, what's wrong?" Derek asked suddenly with concern. I looked up at him. His eyes pierced mine. He looked worried for me. I was about to look away when I saw his hand reaching for mine to comfort me.

I immediately pulled my hand back and looked down and away from him. I did not want him getting the wrong idea about me. It did not matter that he had feelings for me and that my feelings for him had grown more than I wanted to admit to myself. He was only a friend. Should I tell him more? Should I empty myself and tell him everything? No. It would only give me the excuse to like him even more than I already do. I never wanted these feelings for Derek! Despite the fact that I was reluctant to say much to him, something in me wanted to say more.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

I went to say something, but remained silent when I noticed that Roselyn seemed like she wanted to say something. She looked like she was holding back; contemplating on saying what she was thinking about. "What is it Roselyn?" I urged. She looked up at me in silence; her voice on the brink of reaching out to be heard. I so desperately wanted to know why she was down. I wanted so much for her to reach out to me and tell me what was wrong.

~.~ Roselyn ~.~

"What is it, Roselyn?" Derek asked. I looked up at him. His eyes searched mine intensely. I had the urge to look away from his intense gaze and not say anything. I had the urge to just leave and not have to face him. Yet, I took the chance. I looked down and spoke out.

“Growing up, there were only a couple of people in my life who have ever shown me kindness....” I started to say. He waited patiently for me to continue. “I have lived a very hard life.... So for you to be concerned for me and continually try to comfort me...it is very difficult for me to handle. I am not used to so much kindness; from you or your friends. I push people away; it's what I do. So when you ask me what's wrong, forgive me if I find it too hard to answer.”

I looked up at Derek, only to find that he looked worried. “Roselyn, you can tell me anything,” he said, searching me for answers. He went on when I did not say anything. “Roselyn, please tell me. What happened to you when you were a child?”

Feelings quickly overwhelmed me. I looked down, closed my eyes, and shook my head; signifying to him that I could not answer him. I couldn't find it in me to tell him. I did not have the strength. I fought back tears and won...for the moment. “I am sorry if I have wronged you,” he said sincerely.

~.~ Mister Burke ~.~

My heart hurt for her. I never meant to hurt her. All I wanted was for her to confide in me. Something in her childhood has damaged her in some way. Why would she not tell me what had happened to her? I feared the worst. Had someone touched her in a wrong way? No. She had confirmed to me that she had never been touched in such a way. Did someone hurt her? Questions whirled around in my mind as I tried to figure out any possibility of what could have happened.

I felt grieved for her. Something, or someone has scarred her. I have seen the way she has been distant. Whenever I tried to reach out to her, she had always pushed me away and remained distant, despite my efforts...until today. Something had happened to her when she was younger; something that made her push everyone away when they tried to get close to her. That is why she ran away when we were visiting Jonathan and Charlotte. It was all too much for her. She had made an effort, but when she felt suffocated, she ran.

I understood her now. She was not running away from me. She was only doing what she was used to when people became too close to her. I watched her as she opened her eyes and looked up at me. She seen that I was heartbroken for her. There was a long silence, until finally she spoke up.

“Thank you.... For everything.” I simply looked at her. It had taken everything in her to open up to me the way she had today. “You are welcome,” I finally told her, with all of my heart. She then looked away from me in thought. “No one has ever cared enough to ask...,” she said, looking up at me. There was a long silence as we understood one another. My hand reached out for hers, and this time, she did not pull it away.