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“Come to bed?”
The soft voice of Aerie now seemed sickeningly scratchy against my ears. Now is really not the time.
“It’s late, Aerie. I prefer to be alone.”
I was hoping for that to be the end of it, but no. She keeps poking the bear.
“Please come to bed,” Aerie pleaded. “I’m cold and want company.”
“Aerie,” I sigh. It’s not her fault, she doesn’t know, she’s just lonely— “I am not going to sleep in a bed with you. I apologise if that hurts your feelings, but I simply do not want to.”
Aerie looked down at her hands, laying limp in her lap. “...alright, you…go sleep with someone else then.”
If I wasn’t mad before, I certainly am now.
“AERIE,” I yelled, a little too harshly for the poor girl. “I am not breaking up with you, I haven’t shared a bed with anyone since I was seven, and I’m not going to start now.”
Aerie began to cry. I felt guilty, but even more than that, I felt useless. How am I supposed to cheer her up? Wine? I’m certainly not going to fall asleep next to someone, especially not her. That’ll only hurt her more than I already had.
Aerie, I’m sorry I shouldn’t have yelled, is what I should have said and would have said if I had any ounce of emotional maturity, but I didn’t. Instead I patted her on the back and rolled out my own bed to go to sleep. Alone. As intended.
I do not know how to face her tomorrow. Will she leave? Will I have to find my sister on my own? Will she…will she instead “suck it up” in her own…aerie-like-way? Surely one outburst isn’t enough to end my relationship…? I am all for compromising, but I will not share a bed with anyone . Not even her. Especially not her.
Do I apologise to her tomorrow? Do I simply let it be? Is our relationship over?
I don’t know. What I do know is that I will not be getting much sleep tonight.