Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

He doesn't remember when he stopped looking at the moon.

It was an activity he always loved, spending hours gazing at it with his mom

They would sit on the porch, he would relax in her embrace as she hugged him and caresses his hair. She would tell him all the stories she knew about the moon and her relationship with the sun. She would tell him how the moon was their mother, that omegas had a stronger connection with her and that's why Lunas existed.

And that worked for them.

Until it just didn't work for his dad anymore.

He would see them every night and just send them back to sleep.

Oh.

That's right.

That's when it happened.

It happened after his mom was sent to sleep. A deep sleep from which she would never wake up.

That was the moment he stopped looking at the moon. He loved her so much, and in exchange, the moon took away his mom.

The fear of getting put to sleep forever took root deep inside him. And now he never dared to even take a glance at it.

He was now getting ready to go out, his older sister Jihye was helping him get ready while his dad, uncle and brothers were out to hunt.

"I can go to the river! You're still tired from yesterday's chores!" he complains as she brushed his light brown hair that reached his shoulders. He could feel the smile on her face as she started to braid the sides of his hair so they wouldn't get in his way.

"You know dad doesn't like us exchanging chores" he sighs at that "yeah but... it's not fair.." he mumbles as he remembers the last time they switched chores so his sister didn't get too tired. It only ended with Jihye closed up in her room and Felix getting beaten so hard he couldn't walk for days.

"I'll be fast then, I don't have anything to do after so if i finish quickly I'll come to you and help you wash the clothes and bring back water" he says and gets up smiling at her.

"Alright then, thank you Lixie" she smiles back and they get out of the house, a small empty basket in felix's hands while Jihye carried a bigger basket full of dirty clothes and an empty bucket to carry water.

They chat lightly while they walk, talking about their days and their desires on their future alphas. Jihye finally reached 23 years so she would soon get one, their family was just still choosing who. Felix just hoped she would get a kind an sweet one who would treat her right.

Once they reach a crossroad he waves at her as she goes right. She would soon arrive at the river while he still had to walk at least five minutes on the left path to get to the bushes of berries his brother Daehyun found during his last patrol.

He looks around while walking, thinking about what he'll have to do tomorrow and how to prepare.

When he finally arrives he gets on his knees, placing the basket next to him and starts to collect the nice ones. He couldn't certainly bring back ugly or rotten ones, his alphas would rightfully beat the shit out of him.

As he was calmly taking the berries he suddenly flinches when a voice from behind him speaks.

"Excuse me.."

He turns his head, eyes wide as he looks at the stranger in front of him.

Alpha. He immediately thinks.

An alpha, a stranger alpha was now here, on their territory, without permission and most of all, he was speaking to him.

"Sorry but I kind of got lost.. I was camping with my pack and saw these bushes on the way here so I came to get some berries but when I finished getting them I realized that I forgot the way back.. Would you mind helping me find them? You look like you're from here"

He listened attentively, his wolf already growling at him to get on his feet and help the alpha as he was ordered. Asked? It didn't matter.

But.. he was still a stranger in their territory, it was something that happened often, his dad explained that people from the city don't have territories anymore so they don't know about them and to nor enter them.

Usually people would get killed for this, but since they didn't know it wasn't really their fault. So obviously the alphas would only kill if the stranger refused to leave.

But his alphas weren't with him now. He was alone. What if this alpha decided to claim him? What if he got raped? Would he still find and alpha who would want him even if he already got laid with a stranger? He would be such a slut.

"Uhm, sorry?" 

He came back to reality, he was spiraling again.

He lowered his head, getting up and cleaning briefly his pants from the dirt.

"Uhm.. yeah.." he finally spoke, his tone low as uncertainty filled his phone.

"Just.. Please don't come back here... This is my packs territory and people shouldn't enter without permission.." he looked at his feet, hoping this alpha wouldn't get mad.

"Oh- Oh god sorry, I didn't know this, I'll be sure to tell the others, we won't disturb you."

"It's.. uhm, okay... Where is your pack located..?" he listened to him as he explained their tents locations, he nodded and started walking, followed quietly by the taller alpha.

They kept walking in silence, his gaze getting up from the ground only to be sure to go in the right way and not stumble in anything.

After some minutes of silent, the alpha spoke again.

"I'm Jeongin by the way, thank you for helping me"

"No need to thank me.. Just don't get back here, my pack alpha wouldn't like it.." he spoke lowly ".. I'm Felix..." he then continued.

"Oh, nice to meet you Felix, you have a nice name" 

"Thank you.."

Their conversation ended there and they continued to walk in silence until they arrived at the tents.

"Jeongin!" a shorter but fit guy launched himself at Jeongin. Alpha... no, not just an alpha, the pack alpha.

He trembled at the thought, keeping his gaze on the ground

"Where the fuck were you?! We were so worried!" a faint smell of burned roses started to fill the air, he was never able to control his distress, and it was easily recognizable in his scent.

At that everyone's eyes were on him, and he wanted to run. Alpha, Beta, Another beta, again Alpha. One more beta? There were no omegas in this pack.

He started to tremble even more, he was in danger, a pack without omegas surely meant that they wouldn't lose their chance of finding an unmated omega and mark him as theirs.

"I, uhm, I-I'm going then.." he whispered with a trembling voice who sounded like it was about to crack.

"Oh! Wait Felix!" a hand stopped him in his track as it landed on his shoulder.

He flinched and pulled away, feeling his wolf not begin happy about him disobeying an alpha's order.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to scare you.."

"I-I really have to go.." he said looking at the ground, he bowed to them and ran away, his heart racing and his mind making him paranoid, thinking they were following him.

He got quickly back to the bushes, he took as many as he could and ran back home.

Panting and trembling in fear, he was safe now, he was safe, he was home and-

And his alphas were back.

Chapter Text

He fell on the ground, his cheek burning.

He whimpered and quickly got to his knees, tilting his head to the side and baring his neck at his dad, his pack alpha.

"Why the fuck do you have an alpha's scent on you?! You fucking slut!" his alpha gripped his hair hard, making him tilt his head even more

"Speak." he said angrily 

"I-I was picking up berries w-when an alpha from the city told me he's camping with his pack.. He t-told me he got lost and asked me for help to find their tents s-so I told him that this is our- your territory and to not come back, I brought him to his pack a-and went to finish my chore, I just got back home, I-I'm so sorry alpha.." he whimpered on the verge of tears, keeping his hands behind his back, his knees burned, he felt like his hair would get ripped out from how much he was pulling them and his neck ached so bad.

He was finally let go but soon was hit again with another slap, on his other cheek.

"Go to the river, send your sister back here and finish her work, your brother will stay with you to make sure you don't act like a bitch in heat again." Felix gulps and nods quickly, he gets up and follow his brother Jaeyun outside.

He remained close to him, his gaze on the ground, when suddenly a hand wrapped his.

He looked up slightly and saw Jaeyun walk, keeping his hand in his own.

"Did he hurt you? Is the pack too close to our territory?"

He shook his head.

"No, I'm fine.. I ran away before they could try anything, they're near the waterfall so not so close.."

He saw his brother nod.

"How many are they?"

"Seven I think, i smelled four alphas and three betas.."

"No omegas?"

He shook his head again.

"I'll tell dad to keep an eye on you and Jihye, so we'll be sure that you're safe"

"..Thank you..."

He remained silent for a moment.

"I was so scared... thought they would try to claim me..."

He shivers when his brother stops walking and turns toward him.

But instead of hitting him, he caresses his cheek who still burned from the slaps.

"I know Lixie, it's ok, you're only an omega so you couldn't disobey an alpha, you did good running away after you helped them. I'll make sure that nothing happens to you." he smiles slightly and nods, pressing a peck on his lips.

They reach the river and explain what happened to Jihye, she hugs Felix tightly and then goes back home.

Felix gets to work as Jaeyun sat against a tree watching him.

He was now back home, preparing dinner while Jihye was setting the table.

He kept thinking about that pack, he really hoped that he wouldn't see them again.

Once everything was ready he called everyone, while Jihye served water he put food on their plates, starting from his dad, then uncle, closing off with his brothers and at the end he put what was left to him and his sister, obviously putting more in her plate.

They sat down and as always the two omegas waited for all the alphas to start eating. While they all ate they remained silent while the alphas talked about the pack, how to ensure the omegas safety and about other things like hunts and an alpha for Jihye.

Once everyone finished they went to sleep, apart of Felix and Jihye who remained up to clean.

When he finally got to bed he was exhausted, the day was harder than usual because of that pack and he knew he would get nightmares of about them.

When he wakes up he feels sweat roll down his forehead, he whimpers at the horrible nightmare he had. That pack invading his house, killing his alphas and raping him and Jihye after marking them.

He got up and tried to start his day as usual despite the fear.

He and Jihye were supposed to only go out with someone so they'd be safe but his alphas were out and he had to get some more berries since the once he brought yesterday mid panic were all smashed up (an error that his dad didn't forget to punish.)

He got out and went back there with the basket, his eyes widened when he saw Jeongin and someone else at the bushes, picking up some strawberries.

"W-what are you doing here.."

"U-uh.. fuck, uhm, I'm really sorry Felix, we just wanted some more berries so uh.. yeah we came back to get them, we didn't tell our pack! And we know the way back!"

"N-no, no it's wrong, you can't stay here! My alphas will kill you if they find you!" he says worried, wait a second.

Worried? Why was he worried for these strangers? It was their fault, they shouldn't have come back, so why?

"They only warn you once and I already did, you have to go away!"

The two looked at him in shock.

"Kill...?" 

He nodded quickly, keeping distance from them to not get their scents on him.

"Go away!"

There was silence between them for a while, until Jeongin spoke again.

"Felix are you... are you safe with them..?"

He freezed.

That was not what he was expecting.

It was a simple question, right? He was safe with them, he was safe

Even if they slapped him, even if they hit him, even if they killed his mom, even if he could get killed too if it makes the wrong error, he was safe.

Because they were only doing that to protect him, to make him a good omega so he could find a powerful alpha to make even better pups with.

That's.. That's what he had to do.

Be good, find a good alpha and make pups.

It was the only thing he had to do in life, and they were making sure he did it right.

So yes, he was safe. Did he feel scared everytime they go angry? Yes. Did he have to heal his own wounds after he made an error? Yes. Did he always dream about how things would be if it wasn't like this? Obviously.

But he was safe, and that was a fact.

After a moment of silence and hesitations, he nodded.

"Y-yeah.. yeah I'm safe with them.. but that's not the point!"

"Uhm, Hi Felix, sorry, I'm seungmin, I know we only saw each other yesterday but.. you do know that you could leave if you don't like it here right? I mean, I'm not assuming anything but if your alphas kill people they mustn't be so nice.."

Leave?

"Leave?" 

"Yes, leave, you know that you can right?"

He shook his head.

"I cant leave, I need my pack alpha permission to leave, and I would also need another alpha to form a pack or mate.. I.." he found himself staring at the ground.

Was it fair? 

His brothers could leave if they wanted, they didn't get hit if they made an error and didn't have to do chores.

Because they're alphas.

Was it fair? No, of course not, but it's how it works, it's the only right way.

He heard howling, and started trembling.

"They're coming, go! now! please"

They didn't answer, they just turned around and ran away.

He took a deep breath and got on his knees, starting to grab berries.

A big black wolf suddenly ran to his side, smelling the air. 

He shifts back into Jaeyun.

"You still smell like them, you should clean yourself, you alarmed me and I thought you were in danger."

"I'm sorry" he bowed his head "I'll bath as soon as I get home."

Jaeyun nodded and went back to patrolling.

He sighs and when his basket is full of perfect berries, he gets up.

He looks in the direction of his house, but finds himself walking towards the packs tents.

When he reaches them, he tries to stay hidden in the forest, but his scent betrays him and ends up with seven pair of eyes on him, as he slowly takes some steps ahead.

"Uhm.." he didn't know what to say.

He didn't even know why he was here in the first place, it just... felt right...

"Felix, are you ok?"

He nodded, he's ok, he is.

"Yeah, I-I don't know why I came here, s-sorry.." he turns around to go back but he's stopped by Jeongin again, this time, he does flinch but doesn't pull away.

"If you came here there must be a reason"

He remained silent for a moment, then hesitantly looked up at him.

"How is the city like...?" he asked

"Oh, do you want to take a seat? We can tell you about it" he smiles kindly and felix thinks he loses a beat by how beautiful he looks

He nods slightly and sits down next to jeongin and seungmin, the other members of the pack sat in front of him in a circle with a fireplace in the middle, clearly used the night before.

"Firstly, you already know us, but you don't know the others, so.." he starts to points at them

"He's Jisung" beta "Minho always next to him" alpha "hyunjin" beta "Changbin, he's scary but I promise he's sweet" alpha, and a really buff one. He shivers lightly and turns his gaze away "And last but not least, our pack alpha Chan" 

He plays with his fingers a little

"You uhm... did it wrong..."

"Uh?"

"The presentation I mean..." he looks away "it should have been chan, changbin, minho, hyunjin and jisung, in this order.." 

Jeongin looks at him confused "Why-" 

"Our roles, pack alpha, the other alphas and betas at the end, since we don't have omegas" Chan interrupts jeongin and felix nods slightly 

"Yeah no, we don't do that" He then continues

He looks up shocked "what do you mean?" 

"We don't have rules like that, nobody cares if you get presented first or last"

"b-but.." he feels the pack alpha's glare on him and shivers, looking down and nodding

"..soo, the city right?" jeongin tries to lighten the mood

"well, it's big, and loud, there's isn't much nature there, mostly shops and buildings. but it can be fun and beautiful in it's own way."

"My dad says you don't have territories there.."

"oh yeah, that's right, nobody really cares about it anymore, everyone just lives in an house, you don't enter that without permission obviously"

he nods, listening attentively.

"And what about packs?? Do they have their own houses or do they live together?"

"It really changes for every pack, us for example, we all live together in one big house, but some packs prefer to live separately"

He nods again, really interested in the conversation.

"Why do you not have omegas?"

"Oh, we never really found an omega who could fit right, but it isn't really a problem"

"uh it isn't? but who cleans and makes food? and who helps alphas during ruts? a-and what about pups? betas can't have pups.. can't you just buy one?"

"buy?" he gets startled when he hears another alpha speak, he looks back at changbin and then looks down

"Uhm, sorry, it's not my business.." 

He hears howling and suddenly his eyes widens

"Oh I have to go! I really have to go!" he gets up quickly, gets his basket full of berries and starts to run in the forest

He was in the bathroom, immersed in the hot water as blood ran down his nose.

He managed to make them believe that he fell asleep and the smell on him was from yesterday, so he only got punched and was sent to wash up.

He cleans his nose with his hand, sinking in the water until only out from his nose up.

The city sounded so nice, he would really like to find an alpha who'd bring him there to live.

He felt such a pull towards that pack, that must be because of his curiosity.

He always got in trouble because of it.

Why can't i get out of my room? Why can't I look at the moon? Why can't I play like Daehyun and Jaeyun? Why do I have to do chores and they don't?

He always got beaten for his curiosity.

But it was fine if his alphas didn't know, right?

The next time he found himself at their tents, it was in the evening.

His dad told him to wash some sheets in the river before going to sleep so he used that as an excuse to go to them, hoping they wouldn't be asleep.

Fortunately he found them around the fire, talking loudly to eachother.

They looked so happy together.. He never got that in his pack

But when he suddenly felt a burning gaze on him, he looked up only to find chan, the pack alpha, staring at him suddenly serious and cold.

He looked down and was about to walk away when Jeongin saw him.

"Felix!" the alpha smiled "come here!"

He gulped and walked to them, sitting next to him and.. Jisung?

Yes, it was Jisung

"uhm, hi.." he says, looking at the ground, sorry, I didn't want to interrupt.."

"It's alright! how has your day been??" 

He smiles softly.

"Fine" he only says, he would talk for hours about how much he had to hold back his laughter when daehyun fell asleep right on his soup, how him and jihye got free time to just wander around, how he didn't even get hit once today.

But he felt like it would ruin the mood for some reasons, so that's what he went with, fine.

As jeongin is about to talk again, Hyunjin interrupts him, glaring at felix.

"Does your pack know you're here?" felix heard a low growl in his voice and he shivered.

He shook his head.

"I'm not supposed to be here.."

"Then why are you?"

"I uhm.." he looks away nervously 

"Ok that's enough" suddenly Changbin speaks "I didn't have a problem with you since you brought back jeongin when he got lost, but you fucking told us that your alphas would kill to protect your territory!" he starts to raise his voice, making felix a trembling mess "I don't want to imagine what you old way wolfs would do if they found out their omega his sneaking up to meet a random pack-" he suddenly stop speaking, eyes going wide.

Felix is on his knees, right in front of changbin, arms behind his back and neck bared at him, a smell of distress and burned roses fills the air.

"I-I'm sorry.." he whimpers out, his eyes getting teary.

There's silence for a good minute, nobody really knowing what to do.

Jeongin tries to reach for him, but felix only ends up trembling more, baring his neck more when a sob escapes his lips.

So seungmin tries his luck and fortunately, the omega seems only scared by alphas.

"Hey, felix, baby.." he whimpers at the nickname, it sounded so soft..

"yeah, you like that name? mh? baby can you please get up? it's alright, no one's mad at you, this isn't necessary.." he tries to lightly make him tilt his head back, so he would at least stop baring his neck, but it's no use as felix only shakes his head and keeps his position 

"I- .. I-I'm sorry, i didn't want him to- to-" changbin panics, feeling guilty for the situation

"changbin, calm down" seungmin says with a calm voice "tell him to get up"

"w-what..? but you already-"

"he won't listen to me, I'm a beta, and you're the one who he thinks is mad at him, so you have to do it"

Changbin shivers and looks down at felix, who keeps his gaze on the ground

"get... get up.. you don't need to do that..." he tries to say firmly

Felix lets out a whimper as he gets up, stopping to bare his neck

"I.. I need to get back.." he whispers "sorry, I won't come back here..." he bows and goes away, getting back to his house with clean sheets.

He was currently getting beaten by his dad and his brother Jaeyun, while his uncle and Daehyun kept him still.

They quickly found out about the night before, as he didn't even think about washing to get their scents off of him.

"You fucking whore, do you want to end up like your mother?! Doing the slut with a random pack when you're so close to the age of getting an alpha!"

He only cries louder at that.

He should've never gone to them, he should've never dreamed about the city, it's wrong, they have a bad system, they have a bad hierarchy, he would get nothing from that place.

He felt his head spin, black spots dancing around his vision, was he dying? Was he falling asleep forever like his mom did? Why was the moon giving up on him like this? She was supposed to be closer to omegas, but she treated him so badly..

That's when he heard the door slam open.

Chapter Text

"Mom.." he asks, the moon light reflecting on his skin.

"Are you a Luna??"

The woman laughed lightly at the question.

"Why do you ask that, Lixie?" 

"because you surely are one! You know everything about the moon and you're the best mom ever!"

She smiled softly, petting his hair.

"Oh no baby, I could never be a Luna"

"Why?" 

She looks at the moon, smiling as she kept cuddling him.

"Do you know why the moon loves the sun so much?"

He shook his head.

"Because even if everyone sleeps when she rises, even if people hope for longer days, even if they do the most funny activities only when the sun shines bright in the sky, she isn't jealous. Because the sun doesn't feel superior. The sun knows that he could never live without the moon, he knows that he wouldn't get to see all of our little days go by if it wasn't for her, she protects him by rising proudly every night, and watches over us as we sleep."

"But mom, how did they meet if they're never in the sky together?" 

"Oh that's a funny story" she giggled "One day the moon got sick of only rising during the night, she wanted to see how the day was, so she rised while the sun still shined bright"

"really??" Felix looked at her shocked and she nodded

"that's when she saw him, the sun, he let the moon cover him, and right when they were together, they kissed. It was quick, but full of love. From that moment on the moon loved the sun and the sun loved the moon. So they decided that every once in a while, they would meet again, to get a quick kiss, to see each other and to make sure the other one is safe."

"that's cute!" he smiled

"it is.." she smiled back

"That's why I could never be a Luna. I never met my sun. And if i could, I would rise every day, letting the other disappear..." 

"uh..?" he looked at her confused

"but mom, you always protect me, isn't that the Lunas job?"

"oh baby.. I didn't protect you tho... I gave up.." 

"What?"

He looked at her confused

"When the night was about to end, the moon asked me if I wanted to keep rising to make sure that my little stars would be fine... and I said no"

He suddenly woke up, his mind was spinning, he couldn't hear or see well and it was all so confused "m-mom.." he whimpered

"Get.....of here..."

"Brot..er............ar....ted, the si............dad....."

".......hospital.."

He blacked out

"Oh my little star..." he looked up, and there was a pale woman looking at him, her skin was a really light grey, her wide glowing white eyes, he felt pity from them, guilt, while her white long hair touched the ground gracefully 

"I wasn't able to protect you, little star.."

"Who are you?"

"You know who I am"

"You're the moon"

"That's right, little star, it's time you come with me"

"Where?"

"To the sky, to become a beautiful shiny star"

"But I don't want to"

"What?"

"I don't want to become a star"

"Why?"

"Because my sister is in danger, if I come with you she'll be alone"

"Do you want to keep rising, little star?"

"Yes"

"But I'm not a star"

"Of course you aren't"

She caressed his hair

"Go protect her, go protect them"

.

He woke up again, he was in a bright white room, he felt a strange sound coming from his right, he couldn't move.

But at the moment only one word kept repeating in his mind.

Protect. Protect. Protect. Protect. Protect.

Chapter Text

His dad was about to kill him.

That's what the policeman said.

While his brothers and his uncle kept him still, not having noticed he passed away, his dad shifted into a wolf and was about to bite his neck, he was about to rip his skin, he was about to take the life from him, that was already slipping away with the beating.

He was lucky to be alive.

That's what the doctor said.

Four of his ribs were broken, along his right leg and his wrist, he had a concussion to his head and his skull broke. The doctors thought it was a miracle that they managed to save him.

He was gonna be sent to a shelter for omegas like him.

That's what the lady in a suit told him.

He didn't have a place to stay, they were now in the city's hospital and all of his family was in prison so he'll be sent there to recover.

When he asked what happened to his sister, all three of them looked at each other worried

"Your dad.." the policeman started "He managed to escape, and he brought your sister with him, we're still searching for them"

He trembled, not with fear now, no, it wasn't fear, it was something he never got to experience, it was something that he was forced to keep hidden his whole life. It was anger. It was rage.

Apparently the police got an anonymous call saying that they were getting abused in their house. The policeman said that it often happens in traditional packs who don't live in the city.

He just nodded along and followed the lady to her car.

He stayed at the hospital a few days, his healing slowed down now that he felt like he failed to protect his sister, like if his wolf was punishing him for it.

Once he got out he saw that his hair, from a beautiful light brown, turned into a cold white.

The doctor just told him that it happens more often than people think that hair turn gray or white from fear.

He got on the car and they drove in silence, the only sound begin the music from the radio.

He felt a bit unsteady in the car since he never actually got in one in his life.

He felt nauseous and they had to stop for a while to let him recover, he looked at the city both amazed and scared.

Once they actually got to the shelter, it looked like it was an abandoned building.

The walls were ruined, graffiti's decorating them and one of the windows was broken.

They got inside and all the omegas there were either in pairs or alone, there were only one or two groups.

If the outside looked bad, the inside was worse.

He really started to miss his house, how was he supposed to heal when he was scared that a rat would crawl in his bed while he's sleeping?

They got him new clothes, a bed in a room with four more people and got a brief tour of the place.

He started asking himself if sleeping on the street would've been better..

He waved to the lady who left him there and sat down on the bed.

What was he supposed to do now? He had no pack, no mate, no house, he wanted to save jihye so badly but he didn't even know where she was.

He laid down on the bed and fell asleep

That's how he spent his days for a month, he didn't really speak to anyone. He had a routine, eat, sleep, eat, sleep, eat, sleep, wake up the next day and repeat.

It was honestly worse than what he used to live like at home, at least he had something to do, people to talk to and he could go outside.

Don't get him wrong, he was allowed to go outside, but as he remembered jeongin saying, the city doesn't really have much nature there.

He felt so disconnected from the world when he got out and the most prominent color was grey.

One day tho he decided to go for a walk, he was tired since he was used to sleep a lot now but he ignored it.

He was just walking, looking around and trying to dodge the people who walked quickly and careless on the sidewalk.

That was when he smelt it.

That was when he started walking towards a familiar scent, that must've been his sister, it must've been.

She was the only one whose scent he remembered perfectly.

But as he got closer the scent was... strange.

Jihye never smelt like tea and honey.

He entered a bar, the scent now mixing with oranges and mint.

He looked at where the scent came from and his eyes widened.

Right there, at a table, Jeongin and Seungmin were sitting in front of each other, drinking some coffees and chatting calmly.

He didn't know what he was doing, e didn't know why he was walking towards them, he didn't know why he felt tears prick at his eyes and he certainly didn't know why he suddenly sat next to seungmin and hugged him tightly, hiding his face in the crook of his neck and crying quietly.

~~~

After they made the call to the police, they decided to end their trip early and go back to the city.

"Where will he go now...?" Jeongin asked, worried about the small and scared boy he met just a few days before.

"It's none of our business, we helped him, we did our part" Hyunjin said coldly and the conversation ended there.

The car fell in silence, jisung falling asleep on Minho's shoulder who kept caressing his thigh, next to them hyunjin who was looking out the window with his headphones on.

Chan was driving and Changbin was on the passenger seat while Jeongin and Seungmin sat at the very end on the third row of seats.

They appositely bought a bigger car when jeongin and hyunjin joined the pack, the old one not begin able to carry them all anymore.

They could've bought a new car instead but they wanted to stay all close and not having to split up.

As the days went by, they completely forgot about the boy and his shit family, they went on with their lives like nothing happened, not expecting to hear from him again.

And certainly not expecting him to find them at a bar, hug seungmin tightly and start crying.

~~~

"F-felix.." he hears jeongin say as he keeps crying and trembling

"Please p-please please don't leave me alone... please.. I-I don't know what t-to do.." he says between his sobs, begging them to not leave him too.

In normal conditions, he would never do something like this. 

But right now they were rally the only people he knew and he needed help so badly.

"Oh, baby..." he whimpered at the nickname, letting the sweet and calming smell of tea and honey fill his nostrils.

"It's alright, we won't leave you..." he feels himself getting hugged tightly and he relaxes slightly.

It takes him 15 minutes to finally stop to cry, but even then he doesn't pull away from seungmin, he's so scared that he'll disappear if he does.

"Baby, can you stand up please...? So we'll go home and get more privacy.."

Felix shook his head, not wanting to let go of him.

So seungmin looked at jeongin for help, who was already standing next to him.

"Felix-" he reached towards Felix but he stopped immediately as he flinched, trying to make himself smaller in seungmin's hold to escape the contact.

"Oh shit sorry" he backed up, worried eyes looking over at Seungmin 

At the end he had to get up while hugging Felix, which was certainly difficult but they managed to do it.

They couldn't walk like that tho so after some time he convinced the omega to let go, taking his hand instead and keeping him close.

They got out of the bar while Jeongin stayed to pay

"Baby, what happened? Why were you crying?" He asked softly as they walked, making sure that no one bumped into Felix.

"I-I.. I don't know I just... You were the first people that I actually knew since I got here and I.. I really don't want to be alone, I hate begin alone, I hate the shelter.."

Seungmin found himself forcing air in his lungs. The guilt taking up on him. Did they really do good by calling the police...?

They arrived home and felix immediately attached himself to seungmin, clearly smelling the pack alphas scent in the house, sand and salty water begin registered by his brain.

"Come on" Seungmin gently led him to the couch and sat him down, having to sit next to him right after.

Felix then made himself comfortable on his thighs, hugging Seungmin and hiding again his face in the crook of his neck.

"What's happening here??!' he heard a voice behind him, the sand starting to smell burnt, the feeling not soft anymore but hot like when you put your feet on it after it stayed under the sun all day.

He hid in Seungmin's arms, hoping that the alpha would just go away.

"Felix found us at the bar we usually go to, attached himself to me and started crying" Seungmin explained briefly while drawing circles with his hand on Felix's back.

"Baby, is the shelter so bad? Don't you have anyone to go to?" Felix shook his head

"I.. I miss my family... I miss my house, I miss my sister... I failed, I had to protect her and I failed..." he said as tears started to stream down on his cheeks again, he was so sick of crying.

"What happened?"

"Someone called the police, they arrived while... w-while my dad, my uncle a-and my brothers were trying to kill me.." he took a deep breath to not fall into a panic attack "my dad managed to escape and he brought my sister with him, w-while the rest of my family is in prison.. I-I lived in a horrible shelter for a month, I thought I smelled my sister scent before but it was you a-and I just... I-I'm sorry.."

Seungmin remained quiet as he listened to him, patting his back and caressing his hair

"it's okay baby, its alright, you have nothing to say sorry for" he said softly as he looked at chan with guilt and sadness in his eyes.

Chapter Text

When they finally managed to calm down Felix, Seungmin brought him in his and Jisung's room, setting him down on the bed.

"Stay here and rest, mh? I'll be right back with some water" Seungmin said while caressing his hair.

The other nodded and watched him leave the room.

"What the fuck is he doing here?!" 

"Hyunjin, don't raise your voice." Chan scolded the beta.

The alpha immediately asked everyone to come home when he saw Felix, and while Seungmin comforted the boy they reunited in the kitchen, sitting at the table to discuss what to do now.

"No chan! He's dangerous, what if to get him back his dad hurts us?!"

"He has nowhere to go tho.." Jisung said in a low tone.

"He has somewhere to go! The shelter!"

"Oh come on hyunjin, you know better than us how those places are." answered minho while frowning

Changbin remained silent, he didn't know how to feel.

When he had to stop Felix from kneeling he felt... weird, he didn't like that power at all, he didn't like that feeling.

To think what the omega went through to act like that..

"What if we let him stay until he finds somewhere else to go...?"

"What's wrong with you?!" hyunjin just screamed, getting up and going to his room.

The room was now filled with silence until Chan spoke.

"He'll stay here for now, we'll help him find a job and a place to stay and then we'll send him off"

"I felt a pull"

Everyone suddenly looked at Seungmin, who was staring at the table.

"I felt a pull like I did with you when we met.. I just... I always felt like we missed something and maybe-"

"No." chan interrupted him "No omegas in this pack, we made that clear Seungmin, not with what happened the last time we tried having one"

When Felix woke up, he found seungmin and jisung in the room.

Seungmin laid next to him, somehow the omega ended up using his chest as a pillow while he hugged his waist, so seungmin was just scrolling on his phone.

Meanwhile Jisung was on his own bed, headphones on while he wrote something on a notebook.

He felt comfortable, he felt relaxed, like how he felt when he hugged his mom and they both looked at the moon.

He pressed himself against him more and whimpered at the thought, he missed his mom so much..

"How did u sleep honey?" Felix felt himself blush at the new nickname.

"Good.." he only said, not wanting to go deep on how he dreamt of his old life, when his mom was alive and his dad wasn't so.... no, mean isn't the right word, he was only helping him.

"Baby do you mind telling me why you dyed your hair?" he looked confused for a second, thinking about what seungmin meant, then he realized that his hair were now white.

"oh, doctor said it was the fear, they turned white, I didn't dye em"

He only felt seungmin nod and he remained silent, enjoying the comforting moment for a while.

He looked up at seungmin's phone to see what he was doing. Seungmin seemed to notice since he turned it more so he could see better.

They watched some videos for a while, giggling at the funny ones and commenting on the more serious ones.

"Do you want to watch a film after dinner?"

"a film?" felix asked a bit confused

"Yeah, you know what it is? It's like, something you see on tv"

"oh no, we didn't have a tv and dad didn't talk much about the city life"

"oh, I'll show you my favorite ones then!" felix smiled slightly and nodded.

Suddenly someone knocked on the door and the omega stilled at the smell of rain and coffee.

"Guys, dinner's ready" Minho said, looking down at Felix for a second before going downstairs.

Unfortunately for the omega they had to get up and they walked downstairs, after obviously throwing a pillow at jisung who didn't hear minho since he had his headphones on.

He felt nervous as he entered the kitchen, he felt nervous when he sat between jisung and Seungmin, with hyunjin in front of him, he felt nervous when he could clearly smell the scents of alpha's in the air, and he definitely felt nervous when he had to wait for everyone to finally stop chatting and starting to eat, so he could start too.

"Felix" he shivers hearing the pack alpha's voice "We decided that you'll stay here until you find another place to go to, we'll help you find a work so you can provide yourself with money"

He couldn't work, he was an omega and he couldn't, and he certainly didn't want to leave, but at the end of the day this wasn't his house nor his pack, so he nodded without complaining as he looked to his half empty plate.

"Are you done eating?" Felix nodded again, he was never really used to eat much.

"You should finish your food, you're so skinny you should get healthier" Minho commented while taking a bite of his food.

Felix nodded once again, he felt like he would throw up if he ate another bite but he couldn't bring himself to disobey an alpha, not now, not when he was almost killed for his behavior.

So he ate, while the others finally stopped paying attention to him and went back to chatting he ate all his food.

Something he noticed was that Hyunjin was really quiet, glaring at him the whole time. 

Chan looked kind and funny, but when he looked at Felix his eyes were so cold.

Changbin didn't even look at him, pretending he didn't exist.

Minho asked about the food, he probably cooked it so he wanted to know how it was.

Jisung tried to make some small talk but then got lost in bickering with Jeongin.

The young alpha, he knew this because seungmin told him that he was a year younger, looked at him with.. sadness in his eyes, asking if he wanted something else and making sure that he could ask anything, but other than that he didn't really talk to him.

Seungmin meanwhile was subtle, comforting and begin there for him with small gestures, caressing his thigh when he noticed that felix started shaking it too much, making sure that he liked his food, taking his hand under the table and stroking his back. He didn't talk to him too, but it felt better than what the others did.

It must be so weird and awkward for them, if someone suddenly forced himself in his house and pack Felix would too be weirded out.

But in that case it wouldn't be his choice on what to do, it would be the pack alpha's choice, and Chan said he could stay at least for a while so he felt the weight in his chest decrease a bit.

He sat there silently as he listened to them speak, but the nausea was too much and his stomach was trying to reject the food while Felix tried with all his strength to hold back.

At some point he couldn't resist anymore and he pulled a little on Seungmin's sleeve.

"Sorry.. can I use the bathroom...?" Seungmin nodded and told him where it was.

He nodded but then looked at Chan, was he allowed to get up? Did he have to ask? Would it be unrespectful if he suddenly got up and walked away without saying anything? Would-

"Chan, Felix is going to the bathroom real quick" the alpha nodded and felix thanked seungmin mentally, he probably caught on with what was going on in his head.

*

He got up and walked to the bathroom, when he got there he locked the door and fell on his knees in front of the toilet, immediately threw up, all the delicious food leaving his body and flowing into the water.

When he finally finished he catched his breath, tasting an horrible acid taste in his mouth.

*

He flushed the toilet and washed his mouth, he made sure that everything was clean and left how he found it and walked out and back to the table.

"You ok?" Seungmin asked him, he nodded and saw that everyone had just finished eating.

Immediately, and even automatically, he got up and started cleaning the table, grabbing the dishes and leaving them in the sink to wash later, he was just grabbing the silverware when suddenly a hand grabbed his wrist.

He flinched and stopped in his work.

"U-uh.." he looked at Minho, now scared, fear clearly visible as his pupils were now dilated.

"You don't need to do all that, we'll do it"

"oh.. uhm, yeah, sorry I.. sorry... " he stared at the hand on his wrist, scared that the grab would suddenly tighten.

Minho probably saw his discomfort and let him go, he got up and took the silverware from him, bringing it to the sink.

He yelped when a hand touched his back but he calmed down when he saw that it was Seungmin.

"Let's go back to my room mh? We can watch that film"

He nodded slightly and looked at the ground, following him upstairs.

The film was "Howl's moving castle" (best film ever) and it really amazed felix who remained attached to the screen the whole time.

He didn't really understand a lot but he loved how Howl and Sophie treated eachother, he loved her so much even if she looked like an old lady, while sophie loved him so much that she didn't care how he looked.

They were so cute together that they made Felix dream about a future where his alpha loved him just as much.

And just like that he fell asleep with a smile on his face, ending up in a fantasy world with a weird moving castle.

Chapter Text

Felix wakes up early in the morning, like usual, finding himself tangled up in covers and Seungmins arms.

He blushes and carefully manages to pull away. After getting sure that he didn't wake up the beta he exits the room and goes to the bathroom.

After finishing his business, to not wake up seungmin, he goes downstairs.

He looks around unsure of where to go, until he decides he could try to cook for the pack.

Hw enters the kitchen only to find Minho there, already cooking something for breakfast.

He silently tries to exit the kitchen but the alpha's must've smelled his scent, as he turns around and calls for him.

"Felix, you're up early"

He lowers his gaze nodding.

"Yeah.. Sorry I-I can go back to bed.."

"Oh no don't worry, sit down, I'll be finished in a minute anyway"

He nods and sits down at the table, keeping his eyes on his hands.

They remain in a religious silence as minho cooks, until the older interrupts it.

"You can look at me, you know?" he shivers and looks up at him 

"I'm sorry.." he said with trembling voice.

"Why are you apologizing?"

"I didn't know that you wanted me to look at you, sorry.. I won't do it again.."

He starts trembling when Minho turns towards him, a serious look on his face.

"You didn't do anything wrong, it's normal that you fear alphas after what they did to you, just please remember that you can act however you want here" 

He gulped and nodded quickly while looking at him.

One by one the other guys woke up and entered the kitchen, hyunjin glared at him, jeongin smiled softly at him, chan looked at him coldly as usual, jisung waved at him and while changbin ignored him, Seungmin smiled at him and sat next to him.

"Morning lixie, you liked yesterday's film? Did you sleep well?"

Felix smiled and nodded "Yes, thank you"

Minho served the breakfast to everyone and they started to eat.

Felix made himself small in his chair, eating silently as they programmed their day.

"I have to do some vocal lessons with jeongin today" seungmin said before stuffing his mouth with some food.

"Me and changbin will go to the studio, we need to finish some songs" chan then spoke

"I'll be doing dance lessons to trainees with hyunjin" minho continued

"Oh i have nothing to do today, I'll just stay home" everyone nodded as they finished eating

All of them expect jisung then started preparing to go out, so he just went to sit on the couch, looking at them run around the house and grab things, screaming that they lost something only to find it less than a minute later.

He turned around when Jisung plopped down on the couch next to him, vanilla and chocolate filling his nostrils.

"You want to do something today?" he asked, which left felix confused and unsure of what to say.

"Uhm, i don't really know what to do here.."

"oh! well it's easy! firstly, do you want to go out or stay home!"

Jisung waved at minho and hyunjin, who left the house first.

"I think home.. I don't like the city..."

Jisung nodded

"Then we can play board games, videogames, watch a film, cook something, even if i think that I'd probably burn the kitchen down, we can steal hyunjin's stuff and draw something or even steal seungmins books to read them, even if I don't really like reading so much"

Felix listened quietly, giggling at the kitchen joke.

"Oh don't worry, I don't know how to read anyway, hyunjin draws?"

"eeh you don't know how to read?? And yeah, it's his favourite hobby, he has so much stuff in his room that nobody wants to enters it"

"Oh alright, and no I don't, in my pack omegas weren't allowed to read" he looked at seungmin and jeongin as they walked out the door.

"oh that sucks, it must've been hard for you to be in a traditional pack as an omega.."

he shook his head

"it was fine, they were always helping me better myself so it wasn't really a problem"

Jisung didn't answer, instead diverging the conversation to a different topic

"Well so? what do you want to do?"

"Mmh, if you want I can bake and I like films, I don't really know what the other things are.."

"Oh! right, sorry, we can play board and videogames for a while so I can show them to you and then bake something in the afternoon" jisung smiled at chan who kissed his lips before leaving with Changbin.

Felix blushed at the sight and looked away.

"Sure.." 

And after sitting on the couch for a while, jisung got up and went to his room, coming back with various boxes and cards.

They started with uno, playing with open cards to help Felix understand the game and only then starting to play seriously.

The omega laughed especially hard when he was sure that he'd win by making jisung pick up eight but the beta made him pick up twelve.

They played some more games, laughing and having fun until they tried them all.

"Alright alright, now videogames! Do you prefer scary ones or fantasy?"

"Fantasy! I hate scary things" he said worried at the only thought.

Jisung laughed and nodded "Same, I only play them with minho or jeongin. Let's go!" 

The beta grabbed felix by the hand, bringing him upstairs and into their room.

He explained briefly how to use the computer and the console, then he showed him how to use the controller.

"The buttons change for every game so we'll just learn how to use them while we play"

Felix nodded, looking at the controller in his hands.

They played some game called 'Genshin Impact'. It was fun, Jisung said that they couldn't play together yet since the omega just made a new account, but as soon as he reaches level 16 they will be able to and Jisung will help him more.

He almost gasped when the beta told him that he was at level 54, how much did he play this game??

They continued playing at that, then changed to another game, Life is strange true colors, he really liked the mystery and suspense and couldn't wait to find out who killed the protagonists brother.

They decided to stop at midday.

"You can always keep playing when you want, I already finished it anyway" Jisung smiled at him.

"I'll go grab some lunch, you want anything specific?"

Felix smiled and shook his head.

"No everything's ok, thank you, just.. don't get much for me, I'm not used to eat a lot so I'll get sick if I do."

"Oh! You should've told Minho, he's the cook of the house and he can easily make less for you. I'll go then, I'll be back in around 15 minutes, feel free to do whatever you want meanwhile!" 

The omega nodded and watched him go outside.

He looked around and hummed, thinking about what to do.

Then he decided to do one of his daily chores, his old daily chores.

So he started tidying up seungmin's and Jisung's room, making the beds, cleaning the floor and the windows.

By the time he heard the door open he had just finished cleaning everything and putting things back to their place, making sure to not completely change their positions so the two betas would still find them.

"Felix! Come to the kitchen I got lunch!"

He heard Jisung scream from downstairs, so he walked out the room and went into the kitchen, finding jisung dividing food on the table.

"I went to McDonald's, you probably don't know what it is but I got you chicken nuggets and fries, I would've gotten you an hamburger but I didn't know what you liked."

Felix nodded while sitting down. "Thank you." he smiled and started eating after him.

He ate in silence, at least his silence since Jisung would just keep talking on and on.

He didn't dislike it tho. He was used to begin ignored both at his home and at the shelter, so it was nice that someone wanted to tell him something just for the sake to, and not to teach him a lesson on how to behave or give him a chore to do.

"Oh crap, I'm overtalking, sorry, I do that sometimes, Chan always tells me that I should control myself more."

"Oh, no, it's fine, I like when you talk to me.." he blushed at his own words as Jisung gave him a big smile.

"You're such a kind person Felix, I can't imagine how someone could ever want to kil-" the beta's eyes widened, as in shock for what he was about to say "I'm sorry! I shouldn't talk about it, forgive me please"

Felix waves his hand while finishing to eat "It's fine, don't worry, I'm ok"

"Are you?"

He kept silent.

"Sorry, it's just- I saw you tense around Chan and the other alphas so.. Yeah, it's normal if you're scared of them Felix, considered what happened to yo-"

"Please, I don't want to talk about it, I'm fine"

Now, the silence came from both ends.

Felix getting up to clean his part as Han silently finished to eat.

After the beta finished his food and cleaned his part too, he looked at Felix.

"Wanna bake something?"

Felix immediately smiled and nodded.

"What do you have in mind?" The brunette asked.

"Oh! I used to love bake brownies at home! All my family loved them!" He smiled at the memory, it was the only time when everyone complimented him.

"Alright! I told you tho, I'm bad at cooking, so just give me instructions and I'll try my best!"

The omega smiled and nodded, asking jisung to help him get all the ingredients since he didn't know where they were.

They started making the dough, jisung ended up with flour all over his face and Felix thought that he never laughed so hard in his life.

The dumbfounded look on the beta's face when he suddenly found himself painted in white was beautiful.

They finally finished making the dough, they put it in a baking tray and right into the oven.

"Yah Felix-ah! The kitchen is a mess, we better clean before Minho comes home!"

The boy wasn't serious with his words, obviously, Minho would most likely scold them and let them go.

But Felix didn't know this. The only thing he knew was that an alpha was coming home, his kitchen was all dirty, and it was all Felix's fault.

He shivered and started cleaning immediately, a confused Jisung tried to catch up, but felix was just so fast and good that he ended up sat on the couch, letting the omega finish everything.

When the other finally joined him in the living room he looked at him worried.

"You ok Lixie?"

He blushed at the nickname.

"Yeah, I'm ok"

They watched tv while waiting for the brownies to bake.

Felix snuggled up in Jisung's arms as he looked at the screen amazed to see all those people moving around and interacting with each other.

When the timer rang they went in the kitchen and sliced up the brownies, letting them cool off on the table.

"Jisung"

"Yeah?"

"I liked spending time with you"

"I liked it too Lixie"

Chapter Text

"You should buy some clothes"

That's exactly how he ended up in a massive building full of people with Jeongin.

Chan suddenly decided to get him clothes the evening before at dinner.

He said that since all of Felix's clothes are old and used (since they don't give you anything else at the shelter) he should buy some clothes.

He really didn't want to get them since he didn't want to spend their money, but here he was, with the young alpha beside him.

He wanted to go with seungmin or jisung but they were busy so the choice was between jeongin and hyunjin, and well as long as hyunjin was a beta, he also hated Felix so the choice was pretty irrelevant.

He walked behind Jeongin, head low as he followed him closely between the mass of people.

"Let's go in that store, you can see if you find something that you like there, in case you don't we'll change store." he looked at felix and grabbed his hand "You're okay? I know that there's a lot of people here but there will be less in the store I promise."

Felix nodded, a bit dizzy as he tightened the grip on jeongin's hand.

"Yeah.. Just.. a lot of scents, I've never been in places with so many people.."

Jeongin nodded and brought him in the store.

"Here, it should be better now, just go ahead and grab anything that you like"

Felix nodded and started looking around, he grabbed some sweaters, sweatpants and jeans, one or two shirts and at the very end, he grabbed a pretty pink skirt, that reached the middle of his thighs.

Jeongin waited for him at the counter and blushed when he saw what Felix had in his hands.

"Are you sure you want to get that?"

"Uh.. what's wrong with it?"

"How should I say this.. it's just... it's not usual for boys to wear skirts, I mean, it's not wrong! Obviously anyone can wear whatever they want, but you could get some weird look."

"Oh, it's okay, I don't mind it.. If you don't want me to get it I'll put it down"

"Oh nono!" he grabbed the clothes from felix's hands.

"I'll pay for them, you can wait me outside"

The omega nodded and went out, immediately feeling the dizziness come back.

He was just trying to concentrate on his fingers while waiting for Jeongin, when suddenly a hand rested on his shoulder, making him flinch.

"Hey pretty~" he turned around and saw a bigger man, taller and bulkier than him (even if it didn't take much) looking at him with desire in his eyes 

"You look so cute, you're here alone? Why don't you come drinking something with me?~"

"Uh.. I.. Okay..." he said while shivering.

Fortunately the hand was snapped away from his shoulder, Jeongin now in front of him.

"Leave him alone."

"Oh, who are you?~ His boyfriend?? Come on, let the bitch to me, I could probably treat him better than you ever could."

Jeongin saw red and started growling at the man.

"You better go away now." at this the creep raised his hands.

"Oh don't be so serious, I was just joking around." He looked mad as he walked away, when he was finally distant enough Jeongin turned toward the omega.

"Are you ok Felix??" 

The boy nodded, looking at the ground.

"God that creep better not be coming back, why did you accept to go with him?!"

"I.. He's a-an alpha so I just.. I couldn't say no... I'm sorry.." he started tilting his head but Jeongin stopped him.

"None of that, you don't have to just agree because they're an alpha, you can say no Felix"

"But.. it's not right..." 

"What's not right is a random guy taking advantage of you, so please if something like this happens just say no, no one will- ..punish you for it"

"I will"

"..What?"

"My wolf will, he doesn't like when I don't obey alphas.."

Jeongin remained silent for a few minutes, before pulling him in a tight hug.

"It's ok Felix, we'll make your wolf understand that it's okay to not obey an alpha.." 

He shivered at the touch but nodded either way.

"Oh did I scare you..?"

"No I just.. It's fine.."

Jeongin sighed and took his hand "Let's go to a quieter place" he brought him to a cafe at the mall.

It was cute, white tables of wood, a victorian style a bit worn out but still beautiful, they sat in an angle and ordered two coffees.

"Felix I... I don't know how to act around you."

"Uh..?"

"I really want to be close to you, to make you comfortable around me, but I always worry about what to say or how to act because I don't know what you don't like or what you do.. It would really help if you could speak to me"

"I.. I'm sorry, I just can't.."

"What do you mean?"

Felix looked down, gazing at his fingers.

"I can't speak to alphas, I don't know how to.. I was raised in believing that omegas should just adapt to the alphas around them, so I just can't tell you when something makes me uncomfortable or ask you to behave in a certain way.."

"Oh.. well there's always a start right? I promise you that whatever you say I won't get mad, really, I promise on my mom!" 

Felix then looked up at him.

"Are you sure..?"

"Of course" he smiled sadly at him "You can tell me anything, whenever you want"

Felix took a deep breath, rearranging his thoughts and separating what he wants and what he needs to do.

He just remains silent, thinking and staring at the pretty table they sat at, as the two coffees were brought to them.

"I.. I hate when you look at me like that..."

"Uh.. what do you mean?"

"Like- Like if I'm a wounded puppy that you need to heal, an hurt creature that you need to be careful with or you'll hurt it more.. I just hate it, it makes me feel... miserable.." He said with teary eyes, taking a small break before continuing speaking. "I hate how you never talk to me if not to make sure that I'm alright and if i need anything, I see how you act with the others and I want so badly that you act like that with me too, I don't want to be special or someone that you need to change for, I hate to see you change around me, I hate it so much because- because-" a tear fell down his cheek "Becuase I-I always had to change for others and I can't stand seeing people do it for me... I want you to be yourself, I want you to be comfortable with me, to joke, to make fun of me, even to get angry with me, I just want you to be.. you"

He said, his breath now short as he struggled to get air in his lungs.

"Oh Felix I'm so sorry.." Jeongin said after some minutes of silence.

"I was so worried to hurt you that I ended up doing it.." the alpha asks for a cup of water as he passes a tissue to him.

When felix finally calms down, after gulping down a good amount of water, he looks at Jeongin.

"I'm sorry for the overreaction.."

"Oh baby you have nothing to be sorry for, I am the one who's sorry for acting different with you, I just thought it was what you needed after what you've been through.. I mean they tried to-"

"Please let's talk about something else."

The alpha immediately nodded.

"Alright sorry, so how's your coffee?"

"Oh, I didn't taste it yet" Felix said as he brought the cup to his lips, his face twisting into a grimace.

"It's bitter!" jeongin started laughing.

"You have to put sugar in it first dummie!" 

Felix blushes and lets Jeongin put sugar in his cup.

"Now stir it" Felix starts stirring it and once he's done he tastes it again.

"Oh yeah, it's better like this!" felix said while smiling happily.

"I'm glad you like it dummie~"

"stop calling me thatt!"

After finishing their coffees they go back to shopping, this time jeongin helps felix on choosing clothes, he gets some for himself too and they make a small show, parading their outfits until the shop assistants threaten them to throw them out if they don't buy something.

They exit the mall laughing, the concentration of scents not bothering felix anymore as they get on the alpha's car.

"Say Felix, you're 19 right?" the boy nodded "You should get a driver's license once you get used to the city's life, the traffic is a nuisance but it's nice to be able to go around comfortably"

"Oh no, I don't think I could feel comfortable driving these things, they give me nausea"

The younger giggled as he drove towards home.

"Wanna grab something for lunch? I'll ask hyunjin what he wants so we can bring it to him" 

Felix nods "That thing, Mcdonsomething, it was really good!"

"McDonald's? I bet Jisung made you eat that"

"How did you know?"

"He always wants that! It's either that or fried chicken, the boy has a restricted diet of those two things."

Felix laughed and asked Jeongin to get an hamburger of his choice for him

The boy texted Hyunjin to ask what he wanted and they stopped at the place.

They got their food, a cute little girl telling him that she loved his hair and making him blush. Jeongin laughed at him for it until they got back in the car.

When they finally got home and put the food on the table, Hyunjin came downstairs, glared at Felix and grabbed his food saying that he'll eat upstairs.

"Did.. Did I do anything to make him mad..?" Felix asks, not sure why the other hated him.

"No Felix, don't worry, he just needs time."

Felix nodded and started eating silently.

"Jeongin"

"Yes?"

"Thank you for letting me express my feelings"

"Anytime Lixie"

Chapter Text

Felix was starting to think the boys were planning out all this.

After begin alone with seungmin, jisung and jeongin. He now found himself alone with Minho.

The older boy never actually scared Felix, he just kinda.. creeped him out, he was so cold at times even when he was begin comforting. He never saw someone ask how he was doing with such cold eyes.

Since Felix told them that he could cook, Minho asked him to help him out with dinner at times.

Begin alone to cook for seven people wasn't the best and the omega knew how much it helped having someone to cook with.

Minho explained briefly to him what they were cooking, saying that in case he doesn't know how to cook those he would explain as they work.

Felix nodded slightly and started washing the vegetables while Minho cut the meat.

They didn't talk while preparing everything, Minho only actually speaking when he needed to explain something and Felix only doing it when he had to answer him or ask for help.

While chopping the vegetables, Minho started explaining the next few passages, the omega listened attentively but this distracted him from his current job, ending up with him cutting his finger, fortunately it was just a small cut and he didn't chop the whole thing.

Unfortunately tho, he must've hit a vein because a good amount of blood started flowing out.

"And next you stir and-" Minho's eyes widened as he saw felix with a bloody finger and a knife in his other hand.

"Felix! Are you ok?!" he rushed him to the sink, letting water flow on his finger to see the damage better.

"Oh don't worry Minho, I'm good, sorry for worrying you"

"Stupid kid you need to pay attention, I'll go grab some disinfectant and plasters"

"There's no need reall-"

"you stay here and keep your finger under the water." Minho said sternly as he walked out.

Felix didn't know if to be scared or not, he couldn't understand if the other was mad or worried, he didn't know how to act.

He remained with his finger under the cold water, waiting for the alpha to come back. Should he apologize? Or should he reassure him and thank him? He really couldn't understand the older.

Minho walked in, a bottle in his right hand and a box of plasters in the other.

"Alright let me see" he poured some disinfectant on a napkin, gently holding his finger as he passed it on the cut.

"It burns.."

"I know pup, it's alright, it'll end soon" 

Felix blushed at the nickname.

"Pup..?"

"Well yeah, that's what you are"

"But I'm 22"

"Felix people stop begin pups at 23, you're still one"

"don't they stop at 15?"

"Oh no that was an old belief" Minho said as he put a pink plaster with bunnies on it on Felix's finger.

"It's studied now that we're still pups until we hit 23"

He nodded, smiling slightly at the cute plaster.

"Thank you.. you're so- kind..."

Minho looked up at him.

"Of course, why do you say it like you discovered hot water?"

"Oh uhm- nothing it's just.. you're always so cold and serious, I thought you hated me too..."

"Oh no, that's just how I am, what do you mean too?"

"It's nothing, forget it, sorry for assuming that about you.."

"You're not special don't worry, everyone assumes that" minho smiled kindly at him and Felix couldn't help but blush at his beauty.

"Your smile is so pretty.."

This time was Minho's turn to blush, the redness expanding to his neck and ears, making Felix giggle.

"You look so tough but you're actually so cute" 

"Yah shut up, respect your elders!" Minho said as he got up.

Felix giggled and when they found out that because of the distraction the food was now burnt he didn't feel fear as always, he didn't prepare himself to begin hit, he just started laughing and Minho followed right behind him.

They saved what they could and just made something else.

He made an error, but it was okay, because errors are normal.

The next time he found himself alone with Minho was at the grocery store, the alpha handed him a piece of paper with everything they needed.

"You grab these things, I'll go get these." He showed another note with more things written on it.

Before Felix could talk the other disappeard. Well, this was a problem.

He looked down at the note and then up to see the things around him.

Now what was he supposed to do? 

He frowned and stood still, looking around and waiting for Minho to come back.

He waited there for 30 minutes, while people walked around and looked at him weird since he was just standing there without doing anything.

When Minho finally came back he was looking at his phone.

"I already put the stuff I got in the car, let's pay for yours and-" the alpha stopped, looking at felix confused "Where's your cart?"

"I.. uhm, I didn't get anything..."

"What? Why?"

Felix looked at him, like it was obvious.

"Well I don't know how to read, I'm an omega"

"You can't read?" the older now looked shocked

"Yeah, I just told you, I'm an omega"

"Felix begin able to read has nothing to do with begin an omega or not"

"Uhm, yeah it does, omegas can't learn to read.."

"Of course they can, what are you talking about?"

"In my pack omegas couldn't read"

Minho remained silence for a minute, then he spoke again.

"Your pack had stupid rules, I'll teach you how to read, now let's finish getting everything we need"

Felix remained silent, he looked at Minho for a good amount of time as he followed around.

He made the traditions of his family look so.. dumb. with just a few words.

It made Felix wonder how much he missed, how much he lost, just because he was born in the wrong family.

He always thought it was his fault, all of it was it fault for presenting as an omega.

They always knew that he would present as one, they way he looked, the way he acted. It was so obvious that his family grew him up to be an omega since he was four or five.

He really hoped to prove them wrong, he hoped that he would present as an alpha, god even a beta would've been better. Just to not live like this, to not live like his mom.

But he didn't.

When he woke up all sweaty, when he woke up hot like fire, when he woke up with a high fever.

When he woke up with hands all over him.

He knew that it happened, and he couldn't change it.

"..I was raped..." that made Minho stop, blocking his steps as he walked over a rack.

He didn't know why he was suddenly saying this, he didn't know why he was doing it, why here? Why now?

"The time I presented, the first time I had a heat, I was raped."

Minho turned around to look at him, a mix of anger and sadness on his face.

Felix looked up, tears escaping his eyes.

"And it happened again, and again, and again. They would rape me for all my heats... I craved it in the moment, I wanted them to take me.. But deep down.." he sobbed "deep down I hated it so much... when the heat was over I felt nauseous, the only sight of them tore me apart.. Why did they do it Minho? Why? Was it really my fault like they said? Was it really because I'm an omega? Or was it just another stupid rule..?"

When he felt arms around him, he broke down.

He was trembling, his legs couldn't support his weight anymore.

He fell into Minho's embrace like a wounded kitten. 

"It was another stupid rule Felix.. A really, really stupid rule... And I'll make sure that it will never happen again, I promise you this." Minho said, a confident but trembling voice at the same time.

Felix trusted him. Felix knew that Minho would protect him.

When they arrived back home, Minho forced him to go lay on the couch, giving him a cup of water and the remote to choose what to watch.

He then went to the kitchen and only reappeared after fifteen minutes, a cup of chamomile in his hand.

"I waited to be sure that it wasn't too hot, please pay attention anyway" He handed it to him before sitting at his feets and watching tv with him.

"Minho"

"What? Do you need something?"

"No, I couldn't have asked for anything better. Thank you"

"You just have to ask pup"

Chapter Text

The next one up to be alone with him was Changbin.

Which was really hard since the other ignored his presence, pretending that he wasn't even there.

The thing was, they were looking for jobs that could work for him and since he didn't know how to use a computer, internet nor read, Chan opted to let Changbin handle everything.

"Uhm.. could you please let me know if you're finding something..?" he said in a low tone, scared to anger the other.

"Nothing, there were a few jobs but you would need to know how to read for them, it's such an hassle that you can't."

Felix shivered and looked down.

"I'm sorry.."

He heard a low growl from the alpha, and even if he didn't say anything the omega took his clue to shut up and wait.

"Is there even something that you like or you're good at?" the older asked with an annoyed tone.

"Uhm, cleaning and cooking, and I'm good at taking care of animals and kids.."

"I'd cancel out cooking and kids, too risky and you could need to know how to read or how modern things work. You could clean houses and care for pets."

Felix nodded, looking at his feet.

"Say something"

"Uhm, y-yeah, sorry, I-I'm ok with that"

"Ugh, why are you so annoying?! Stop acting like I could kill you in any moment!"

Changbin realized his words too late, as he saw Felix tears fall, like his knees when they touched the ground.

He watched as the younger bared his neck at him, again.

"God no! Get the hell up! Stop acting like this!" Changbin got up, looking down at Felix.

Felix immediately got up, lowering his head.

"Im sorr-" he started, but stopped when he heard the other growl.

He couldn't understand, he just didn't get what Changbin wanted from him, everything he did seemed to be wrong and he was just so confused and scared.

"Just leave me the fuck alone!" the other screamed as he stormed out of the room.

He sighed and played with his fingers, before drying up his tears and setting the computer on the coffee table.

He thought about what to do, with the others it was easy, they weren't especially mean to him and they let him-

Talk, they let him talk.

He could try to talk to Changbin, no! He could try to listen, so he will finally know why the other acted like this.

He nodded to himself and went upstairs, nodding to Chan's and Changbin's room.

"Come in" 

He only heard, so he took a deep breath and opened the door.

Their room wasn't really big or anything, there were two beds on opposite positions in two angles, a desk with two computers on it and paper nots scattered all over and around it.

A big wooden closet sat in the last remaining corner, even if clothes were everywhere but in it.

Changbin looked up at him from where he was sitting on his bed, his back against the wall as he wrote down on a notebook.

"Uhm.."

"If you came here to apologize more you can leave."

"No I.." he finally looked up at the alpha, taking a big breath and finding the courage to speak "why do you act like this..?"

The room fell into a loud silence.

Felix starting to regret all the choices that brought him here as he lowered his gaze again on the ground.

After a minute or so, the silence was finally broken by Changbin.

"What?"

"Uhm, I-I don't mean anything bad I just... y-you always ignore me and seem to hate me so I- well I found out that talking about what bothers me helps me s-so I just thought it could help if you told me what I was doing wrong.." he said, his voice getting more and more quiet as he spoke.

"This."

"This is what I don't like." 

The omega looked up, a confused look on his face.

"You act so- so submissively! I can't stand it, I hate feeling like I could just crack you however and whenever I wanted! I hate how you kneel whenever I get mad and I absolutely hate when you just apologize for everything when it's not even your fault!"

Felix found himself at a loss of words.

He was expecting everything but this.

He was really prepared to get told how he wasn't liked because of his looks, of his begin an omega, of his intruding into their lives. Anything but this.

"I.. I'm sorry.." he said once again "I just can't really stop... I mean, I was raised believing that I should act a certain way with alphas so I just find it hard to act.. normally..."

"Stop apologizing for a start. And don't stand there" He looked up to see Changbin patting the bed next to him, so he quietly walked over him and sat next to him.

"I get it Felix, trust me, I do. My parents were also traditionalists, even if not as much as yours, and I was also raised to act a certain way as an alpha."

"Really?" the boy looked surprised and Changbin just sadly smiled.

"Yeah.. I was raised to be tough, confident and to feel superior to everyone. And I grew out of it"

"You did?"

"Mhmh, I didn't really had friends at school. I was just so arrogant that no one could stand me"

"How did you end up like this then?"

"Oh well I met Chan, for a start. I always liked to go to gym a lot, so I was always bigger than the other alphas and even they feared me. You can't imagine how much it hurt my pride when Chan, a random kid who just transferred schools, made a bet with me and beat the shit out of me"

Felix shivered at the words.

"Beat? A bet??"

"Yeah, he said that if he could beat me I would try to change. I was so prideful that I accepted immediately and I lost. I felt like i failed at first, but then you can't imagine the respect that filled me and it was all for Chan. He was really strong but he never bragged about it and was always kind to everyone."

"He seems nice.."

"He is. That's how I met Jisung, they were friends and already decided to form a pack after school ended, so I just joined in. Then we found Seungmin and Minho at the local library. Jeongin was begin bullied right behind our house. While Hyunjin was just running from his old pack, so we helped him out."

"You all seem so close.."

"We are"

"I hope to find a pack like yours one day, and if I really can't I want an alpha kind like you"

That was the first time he saw Changbin blush. He was so pretty like this.

"Yeah well, the point is, you can grow out of it. You just need to find the right people"

Felix smiled as he thought 'I found them'

But they weren't his, and he wasn't theirs.

"Then I hope to find them soon. I promise you that I'll try to act normally around you"

"It's okay, really, I shouldn't have go off at you, it's really not your fault. I just hated so much the feeling of seeing you kneeling that I let myself be biased by that feeling."

"It's okay"

"..Have you done it many times?"

Felix sighed and nodded.

"Almost everyday, my dad and brothers, even my uncle always found something that me and my sister did wrong, and I had to kneel and apologize or I would've been hit."

Changbin silently listened to him, as ha hand slowly rested itself on the Omegas leg, caressing it in a comforting way.

"I honestly hated it. Baring my neck like that, anyone could've just.. claimed me... I was so scared of that happening, but it would've been worse if I didn't so I just got used to it."

"Mh.. well just remember that you don't need to do it anymore, you're safe here, no one will hurt you in any way."

Felix nodded, smiling slightly.

"Oh crap I have to go to the studio now."

"You guys keep saying that, what's the studio?"

"Oh it's our workplace, we make music as a group"

"Really?? That's amazing!'

Changbin smiled "Do you want to come with me?"

Felix's smile widened as he nodded quickly.

"Yes, please!"

Changbin could only blush and smile at the sight in front of him.

"You're a ray of sunshine Felix, I don't know how someone could ever take that beautiful smile of yours from you"

When they reached the company, as they got off Changbin's car, the older explained to Felix that they had a contract to make music, they decided to start their career two years before, when everyone was finally old enough and ok with it.

They entered the massive building and the omega remained close to Changbin, scared that he'd get lost if he suddenly found himself on his own.

"Hyunjin and Minho are practicing on the second floor, but we're going on the third one."

Felix nodded and they took the elevator. When they finally reached the right door between all of them in the long hallway, Changbin opened the door, letting Felix inside and following right after.

That's when he saw Chan really concentrated on his pc with his headphones on, probably the reason he didn't hear them enter.

He shivered as he looked at the pack alpha. The older always seemed so cold towards him, but not like Minho.

Minho was comforting in his own way, meanwhile Chan actually looked at Felix like he was just an insect to get rid of.

Changbin told him to sit on the couch behind them as he walked towards Chan.

The omega didn't say anything and made himself comfortable on the leather sofa, bringing a pillow between his arms and looking at the two alphas.

Changbin gave Chan a big scare, and the other screamed and started cussing him before starting to laugh.

The scene was so simple, but so precious that it made Felix heart ache.

I'll never have this.

He thought as he looked at them while Changbin sat next to the older.

At some point Felix started to think that they forgot about him.

Actually.

Chan never really noticed him at all.

So the omega made himself small on the couch and hugged the pillow closely, staring at the floor for a good amount of time, lost in his thoughts.

It was only when a hand shook him that he actually regained consciousness.

He looked up to see a worried Changbin looking at him.

"Felix are you alright?" He nodded almost immediately, like it was automatic for him at this point.

"Yeah, 'was just lost in my thoughts, sorry hyung"

The older blushed and nodded.

"Don't worry, wanna have a listen to what we made?"

Felix nodded and looked over at Chan, that was staring at him with the usual cold eyes.

He shivered and got up, Changbin leading him to his chair and playing the song, well at least the base of the song since no one was singing.

"We were thinking of asking Seungmin to sing this"

"Seungmin sings?"

The other nodded.

"Seungmin, Jeongin and Minho are vocalists, Chan, Jisung and Hyunjin sing too but they're rappers."

"Ooh, that's cool, this song is pretty, I really want to listen to it when it's finished"

Changbin smiled "We'll let you listen to it once it's done, wanna see the lyrics?"

Felix nodded and he was landed a piece of paper.

"Uhm.. I can't-"

"Oh right! Sorry, forgot about that"

The alpha grabbed the paper back and started reading the lines to him, Felix memorizing each one as he spoke.

The two then left to grab some coffees.

Felix waited patiently there, replaying the song and humming the lyrics that he carefully memorized.

"How've you been?

I guess you're fine

It's been pretty long

Since we've last seen"

He definitely did not hear the door open as he kept singing in syinc with the music.

"Honestly

Throughout my life

Deep inside

I never felt alive"

And he really didn't hear it close right after.

"The way you used to touch my soul

Was always so sweet and lovely

No matter how far apart we were

You'd always pick up the phone"

He didn't hear the sound the couch made when someone sat down.

"But now I'm truly all alone in this world

I miss the way you felt so close to my bones"

He didn't hear the noise of the pillows as they were getting moved.

"I'm sinking in the deep end

I'll just try

To cry myself to sleep

Please stop this pain"

He didn't feel the eyes glued to his back.

"If you hadn't changed

Then I'd still be by your side

If I gave you one more chance

Can we go back again?"

And that's why he flinched when he heard a voice behind him, and it definitely wasn't Changbin's voice.

"Your voice is amazing Felix.."

Chapter Text

"Your voice his amazing Felix..."

The omega turned around, startled by the sudden voice, just to see Chan with a pillow between his arms looking at him.

"Uhm, yeah, thanks, s-sorry.."

"Why are you apologizing?"

"I shouldn't have sang.." 

"Why not?"

"Well I'm-" he stopped himself, it was probably another stupid rule

"I wasn't allowed to sing at home, I just- they are habits that remain..."

"You weren't allowed to sing?" the alpha frowned and Felix nodded.

"Most of the times when I sink my voice slips, my dad always said that it's not good for an omega to have such a deep voice..."

"I think your deep voice is beautiful"

That made Felix blush, no one ever told him that his deep voice was beautiful, they awlays said it was unfitting and useless, that it made him ugly and unwantable.

"Thank you.." the omega looked down.

They fell into an awkward silence. Felix playing with his fingers, not daring to look up at what the other was doing.

"Fuck.. I think I can't escape this anymore.."

"What..?" Felix asked confused, finally looking up when the other spoke after around ten minutes.

"I just- I'm sorry for treating you so coldy, I was just trying to not get attached to you.."

"Uh.. why?"

"Because we've had a bad experience with an omega before. Hyunjin especially. And I promised him that I would never let one in our pack, but.. we felt the pull Felix. We all felt it, Hyunjin too even if he doesn't want to admit it."

"the pull..?"

"Yeah, when someone seems to be perfect for you, when you feel attracted to them even if you don't know them, it's when you know that you're mates"

"mates..? I- N-no no I could never, I-I can't intrude in your pack, in your life like this.."

"Oh Felix you didn't intrude, we were destined to meet, we're destined to be together, till the day we die... but.. I made a promise Felix, I made a promise to Hyunjin, and I can't force him to like you or even accept you in the pack."

Felix took a few moments to metabolize everything he just said. They were mates...?

"What happened with the omega?" he finally asked.

"Oh, that.. It was a year ago, there was a girl, she was my age and was our choreographer. She seemed fine, she was always sweet and kind to everyone." He saw the alpha clench his fits, felt the change in his scent, turning into anger. "And we didn't notice it. We didn't notice how she was actually treating Hyunjin. She kept sexually harassing him, insult him and even hit him when we weren't around. She grew so close to us that we thought she was a mate, so we asked her to join the pack. That was the moment Hyunjin broke down, he told us everything she did to him, he told us that he didn't say anything before just because she threatened to do the same thing to each one of us."

A sarcastic laugh left his lips.

"Can you believe it? He didn't say anything not because of his safety, but because of ours." he growled

"We immediately fired her and got her arrested. But Hyunjin was really broken by the experience, he couldn't eat, talk or even let himself be touched for a whole month before he actually started getting better. He already had a bad experience with omegas in his last pack but that's not my place to tell. So I promised him that we would never let one in our pack. I couldn't imagine that the last piece we were still looking for would be an omega."

Felix gulped, watching as Chan slowly calmed down.

"I'm sorry.. That must've been so hard for him.."

Chan nodded. "It was, and honestly it was for us too... seeing our mate hurt like that.. it made us hurt too"

Felix nodded and lowered his head, a strange feeling in his chest as he thought about what Hyunjin must've been through.

"We'll help you Felix, we'll help you get your independence and heal. But I can't promise you that you'll be staying with us, I won't supress even one complain from my packmates, even if only one has something in contriary with you staying, then you'll go."

Felix smiled slightly.

"You're a good pack alpha Chan..."

"Changbin I-I don't think it's a good idea.." Felix said in a low tone, following the alpha into the practice room.

Fortunately it was all empty now.

"I'm just showing you around, they're not even here so it's fine!"

The omega gulped and nodded, looking at the big room, a wall made of mirrors and small benches at the sides.

"That door brings you to the bathroom while that one let you go to the changing room" he pointed at them, Felix following the finger to look at the doors.

"See? That was quick and fine, just like I told you." He said but as they turned around the door opened, revealing Hyunjin and Minho with a bottle of water in their hands.

Minho immediately looked at Hyunjin, as the beta's eyes turned from happy and relaxed to cold and hateful.

"What is he doing here?"

"I was just showing him around, we're leaving now." right when Changbin was about to pull Felix out of the room, him and Minho's phones started to ring.

They looked at them and their eyes widened.

"Guys we have to go, alphas only" Minho immediately said and looked up at Hyunjin worried "text if anything happens, you'll be fine, please, please, keep Felix safe." he turned around and started walking outside with Changbin right behind him.

Felix standed there, awkwardly and unsure of what to do.

"For fucks sake, go sit down and don't move a muscle." Hyunjin said clearly annoyed. And Felix complied, sitting down and literally begin still for a good 30 minutes.

In that time Hyunjin sat across from him, on the other side of the room as he red a book.

"When I said don't move a muscle I didn't mean it literally."

Felix shivered when he talked to him and nodded slightly, looking around, everywhere but at Hyunjin.

After some more minutes of silence the beta spoke again.

"God don't you have anything to do?! Read a book, use your damn phone, don't sit there like a lost kid!"

"I.." Felix started but felt his voice die in his throat.

"Sorry..." he only whispered, probably not loud enough for Hyunjin to hear.

He felt tears prick at his eyes and he looked at the ground, playing with his fingers.

"Can't you speak louder??! Why are you crying now?! What the fuck do you have to cry about?! You're so fucking annoying, I don't understand how the others can like you, if your stupid dad comes here and finds you with us we're dead! You're just a danger for us and I bet that you're not even all innocent like you love to act! Admit it goddamn it! Admit that you killed people too! Admit that you tried to assault them! Admit that you're a fucking wild beast that grew up in a forest like an animal! ADMIT IT!"

At this point felix could only cry.

He was not a beast, he was not a wild animal and he surely never laid a finger on anyone. He was the hurt one, he was the one who had to hide the bodies, he was the one who was blamed for their deaths, he was the sacrifical one, he was the one who got assaulted and almost killed. He.

Why couldn't Hyunjin understand?

"I-"

"AND DON'T SAY YOU'RE FUCKING SORRY YOU-"

"I WAS ALMOST KILLED" he screamed, now getting up and looking at him with his eyes full of anger.

His eyes, that now glowed a bright purple. But he couldn't care less right now.

"I WAS RAPED FOR YEARS AND YEARS! I WAS ABUSED AND BEATED! I HAD TO HIDE BODIES OF INNOCENT PEOPLE, THEY BURNED MY SKIN WHEN I EVEN BROUGHT UP THE IDEA OF GIVING THEM TOMBS! AND FUCK HOW IT HURT! IT HURT SO DAMN MUCH! THEN I ALMOST GET KILLED AND WHEN I WAKE UP MY BROTHERS AND MY UNCLE ARE IN PRISON, MY DAD RAN AWAY AND TOOK MY SISTER! I'M FUCKING ALONE AND I DON'T HAVE AN HOUSE TO GO TO! I LIVED IN AN HORRIBLE SHELTER FOR A MONTH! AT SOME POINT I STARTED SLEEPING ON THE STREET BECAUSE EVEN IF IT WAS COLD IT WAS CLEANER THAN MY BED! THE OTHER PEOPLE THERE TOOK MY FOOD, MY CLOTHES, MY BLANKETS, THEY TOOK EVERYTHING THEY COULD JUST BECAUSE I WOULDN'T FIGHT BACK! AND I'M SO SICK OF IT! YOU WERE THE ONLY ONES NICE TO ME SO SORRY IF WHEN I SAW SEUNGMIN AND JEONGIN I COULDN'T STOP CRYING! SORRY IF I ASKED FOR HELP! SORRY IF I TALKED TO YOUR MATES! I NEVER ASKED TO BE IN YOUR PACK, I NEVER ASKED TO BE HERE, I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO BE ALONE!" he sobbed and catched his breath for a moment "I-I.. I'm so sick of begin weak a-and alone... I'm so sick of all of this.. I wish I just gave up.. why did I want to keep fighting? Why didn't I just die...?"

He looked right into Hyunjin's eyes. 

"Why do you hate me...?"

Chapter Text

"I don't- I don't hate you! I just- I mean, y-your dad.." Hyunjin was at a loss of words.

He didn't hate Felix, he never thought anything like that, he just wanted to protect his mates!

"You're- You're dangerous!" he tried to explain, but now his words felt so.. wrong.

He was just an hypocrite, wasn't he?

He was in the same situation as Felix just a few years before. 

He should've been the one who understood the omega better.

So why was he treating him like this?

Why did he feel so hurt and guilty at the sight of Felix's eyes full of tears, trembling like a leaf as he looked so damn broken?

Did he really go through the same thing as Felix, or did the boy have it worse?

Without thinking he walked forward, suddnely hugging a shivering Felix, holding him tight in his arms.

"I'm- I'm sorry.. I'm so sorry... I shouldn't have treated you like that"

He hold the omega as he broke down in his arms, his legs not supporting his weight anymore.

He sat on the ground and kept the crying boy on his lap, hugging him and caressing his back as he slightly swung back and forth.

"It's ok... You're okay, I promise to not act like an ass anymore..." he said guilty, trying to calm him down.

"I-I.. Changbin told me y-you ran away from your pack.. and Chan said you had a bad experience with an omega.. so I thought it was normal that you hated me b-but... I promise I never did something like that..."

"I know baby, I know... it was my fault, I'm sorry."

They sat like that for a good amount of minutes, Hyunjin hugging Felix as he whispered comforting words in his ear, while the other just relaxed in his arms, resting his head on his shoulder.

After some minutes Felix spoke.

"Why did you run away..?"

"Mh.. Are you sure you wanna know?" the other nodded.

"Ok.. Well, my pack was made of two omegas and three alphas. I was the only beta. So obviously during ruts and heats I just kinda took care of them, making sure they drank and ate and were at least a bit clean. At some point my old pack alpha thought that wasn't enough, and in his next rut he kept fucking me for days.'

Felix shivered at the mere thought. "That's so- I'm sorry.."

"It's okay. Well I mostly blacked out during those days so I don't remember much. I just remember that from that point the alphas became jealous of the omegas, it was like if they thought that I'd try to steal them. But at the same time they wouldn't let me go. So I was stuck with them, getting beated and raped depending on the day. Until while the others were busy helping the pack alpha prepare for his imminent rut I decided to run away. Fortunately they hadn't mated with me yet. I found Chan at a bar with Changbin. I asked them if they could shelter me for a while, until I could get back on my feet and they were so stupid to say yes.." he giggled. "who would let a random stranger inside with no questions?"

"Well that saved me, the pack didn't find me for a while and I got to know the others. When they actually found me I was already mated to Chan, so they gave up and left me here. Chan was ready to fight them if necessary.." he smiled a bit at the thought.

"I'm happy that you found nice people.."

"You found them too Felix, maybe don't count me, but you found the others"

"Mh.. You're nice too..."

Hyunjin was about to speak but he stopped when he saw that the other fell asleep in his arms.

He smiled and got up, he grabbed the duffel bag with his stuff in it and left, holding Felix tight as if he would just fly away if he didn't.

When they got home, all the voices that he heard from outside were suddenly silent as he walked inside.

Felix still in his arms and the other members looking at them shocked.

"He's sleeping" Hyunjin just said to warn the others to not make noise, as he walked upstairs and went to his own room instead of seungmin and Jisung's one.

The beta gently laid the omega on the bed, tucking him in and moving a few locks of hair away from his face.

"Goodnight Lixie.." he whispered before going out and leaving the door just slightly open so the room wouldn't be completely dark.

He didn't change the boy because he was scared to wake him up and startle him. Hyunjin knew better to let the other suddenly wake up with someone undressing him.

When he walked back downstairs he was immediately submerged with questions.

"Yah will you just stop??! You're so annoying, he fell asleep and I brought him back, it's your fault if we were alone in the first place!" he pointed at them with a slight blush on his cheeks "Why did you even leave?"

And at that the room filled with silence again, Hyunjin felt out of place, like if he didn't know something that the others knew.

"What happened?" he immediately asked.

"Jeongin lost control, a staff member made a comment about Felix and you know that his temper isn't the best.."

"Is the guy ok?"

"Yes, unfortunately." Jeongin made sure to emphasize.

"Jeongin! I know you just presented some months ago but you need to control yourself better!" Chan scolded him.

"I don't care hyung! He called Felix a- a-" the boy groaned in frustration "I can't even repeat it! It was so mean and out of place! He had no reasons nor rights to call him that!"

"Jeongin you sent him to the hospital!"

"It was deserved!" the young alpha screamed before getting up and storming to his room.

"Yah that kid.." Chan sighed as he watched the boy run out of the room.

"You would've done the same, just leave him alone" Changbin said patting the olders back "I know that I would've done worse for sure, can't scold him for something we would've all done." he said as he got up from the couch and went to the kitchen.

"Well I'm going to shower, make sure to not make noise near my room, Felix is there" Hyunjin said as he escaped from the room, before the others could start teasing him.

He hated begin wrong because they never left him alone for days when it happened.

When Felix woke up it was late at night, he yawned and snuggled up in-

Wait.

Where was he?

He looked up and blushed as he saw that he was using Hyunjin's chest as a pillow, while the other hugged him by the waist.

He looked so ethereal while sleeping that Felix didn't want to get up, he wanted to stare at him until his brain registered every single detail of his face.

Unfortunately tho he really had to use the bathroom so he carefully got out of Hyunjin's embrace and bed and got up.

Right as he was about to leave tho, he saw Hyunjin's sweater laying on the desk chair.

It was left there, abandoned, like if it would stay there at least one month.

It was fine if he just...

Without even realizing it he was now in the hallway, Hyunjin's sweater in his hands as he walked to the bathroom.

Why did he take it? When did he take it? It had all been so instinctive that he hadn't even registered that he took it.

He left the sweater on the handle of the bathroom and took it back when he finished his business.

He hugged it closely, smelling the faint scent of lavender and roses on it.

He looked around and quietly walked to an empty closet that he never saw the boys use, it was right under the stairs and it was just a bit dusty, he ignored it and let the sweater fall on the ground before smelling it once more.

He then closed the door and went back to bed, hugging Hyunjin and falling back asleep.

When he woke up, everyone was still asleep.

He was awake, he was sure of it, but it felt like he was just dizzy, like he couldn't really open his eyes even if they were open.

When he actually woke up, he was sitting in the abandoned closet, surrounded by clothes and covers of the other boys.

He whimpered as he realized what was happening, he felt nauseous at the thought if his heat coming, but at the same time he couldn't help but feel comforted by the mix of scents around him.

He had stole the other's stuff and made a secret nest with it in their closet. 

That was such a disgusting thing to do, it was perverted and wrong. But he couldn't help it, he never felt this way, he never felt the need of a nest, he never felt the need of feeling his pack scents around him.

Wait..

His pack..?

This wasn't his pack, hyunjin was clear about it, he didn't want him, and chan already stated that they wouldn't have omegas in the pack.

His chest hurt at the thought, he found himself whimpering and nearly tearing up. 

He wanted them, he wanted to be their and them to be his. He wanted to be apart of their pack..

He cringed even more when he smelled his scent growing and filling up the room.

The smell of strawberries and early mornings now feeling extremely sweet and strong.

He hated it so much, he hated having it, he hated how strong it was when he went in heat.

But he wasn't in heat now.. He wasn't. Was he?

No, no, it was wrong, he couldn't go in heat here. He had to leave.

Yes.

That's right.

He had to leave.

When Hyunjin woke up he couldn't find Felix.

He didn't think of it much at first, but when he saw that he wasn't in the bathroom nor in the kitchen he started to worry.

Had he gone out? He didn't usually leave alone, he made clear that he hated the city.

Yes, Hyunjin listened and noted his preferences even when he was trying to avoid him.

He was about to go upstairs to call the others when a strong and sweet smell of strawberries hit his nose, coming right from the closet.

Oh.

Chapter Text

"Baby please.."

"No.. stay away..!" Felix was in a corner of the closet, while Hyunjin looked at him from the doorframe.

Seeing Felix sitting in the middle of the small room was already a surprise, but what catched his eyes the most was seeing all their clothes, blankets and god even pillow cases all fixed up on the ground, forming a nest.

He didn't want to enter it without permission so he stayed outside, but Felix was now crying, he had his legs closed to his chest as he hugged them with his arms.

He wanted to comfort him, he needed to comfort him but he would only scare him more if he entered the nest.

"fuck.. ok, ok I'll stay here mh? I won't get closed" he sat down, looking worried at Felix. "baby please calm down, you'll be ok, i promise"

"n-no.. no... I-I stink and there's alpha a-and.. please, please go away.." the younger said while sobbing, tears streaming down his cheeks like rivers.

"Oh Lixie no, you don't stink baby, and I promise you the alphas won't do anything to you" but the boy just kept crying and Hyunjin had no idea of what to do. 

How could he calm him down? He couldn't even get near him!

"Baby, I'll go grab the others real quick, you wait here mh?"

"N-no! no! I don't want the alphas!"

"No alphas, promise, only Jisungie and Seungminnie, ok?"

Felix didn't look convinced but he nodded slightly while looking at him.

So Hyunjin got up and went upstairs as fast as he could, barging into Jisung's and Seungmin's room, finding Jisung still asleep while the other was getting dressed!

"Fuck Jisung wake up!" Hyunjin threw a pillow at the poor sleeping boy, who suddenly woke up confused and disoriented.

"Yah! Hwang Hyunjin what are you doing?!"

"Guys I need help, I think Felix is in pre-heat, he closed himself up in the closet and he keeps crying I don't know what to do!" he explained briefly, already walking out of the room.

"What?!" he heard the two boys say in unison.

They all went back downstairs just to find Felix still crying in his corner.

"Oh, Lixie.."

Felix immediately tried to cover his scent glands with his hands, only crying more.

"No! N-no.. stay back, I-I stink, stay back..."

"Oh Felix no, your scent is the sweetest thing I've ever smelt, it's amazing, don't cover it up" Jisung said, crouching down at the entrance of the closet and nest.

"really...?" 

Jisung nodded as he smiled slightly and felix slowly lowered his hands.

"Can I enter the nest baby?"

Felix seemed to think about it but then he nodded "Only you.."

"Of course Lixie, only me" Jisung carefully entered the nest, paying attention to not move anything as he walked over felix and sat next to him. He opened his arms waiting to see if the boy wanted a hug and looked at him.

Immediately Felix climbed up Jisung legs and hugged him tightly, burying his face in the other's neck as the older hugged him by the waist.

"You smell amazingly Lixie, I'm not lying, why don't you calm down a bit? I'm here with you" Jisung said as he caressed his back.

"I'll go grab some water.." he heard Seungmin whisper as he walked away.

"I better warn the others" Hyunjin then said before going back upstairs.

"Why are you crying baby, mh? Do you want to tell me?"

"Mmh.. I.. I stole your stuff.. I made a nest i-in your house, I stink, a-and I don't belong in your pack, there's alphas and I'm going in heat a-and-"

"Okok slow down Lixie, who said that you don't belong here? As long as I know nobody has a problem with you anymore, and yeah you took our stuff but I bet that nobody will be mad at you, the nest you made is beautiful and we never had one here so everyone like it, I promise. I already told you that you don't stink and the alphas are not a problem, we'll kick their ass if they only think about doing something to you, mh?"

Felix sobbed and nodded slightly, clutching his sweater in his hands as he inhaled his chocolate and vanilla scent.

He tugged a bit at the cloth, trying to take it off him.

Jisung only smiled, letting him "You want my sweater baby?"

Felix nodded so Han just took it off and handed it to him.

He watched as Felix fixed the nest to make space for it, before going back on his legs, hugging him again.

Something felt wrong tho.. his clothes felt so itchy on him, they burned his skin everytime he moved, making him cringe.

He took his shirt off and threw it outside of the closet before hugging Jisung again, happier now to have more skin to skin contact.

"Better now Lixie?" Jisung asked, letting the younger hug him and wrapping his arms around him.

The other nodded, resting his head on his shoulder.

"I don't want to leave... I-I don't want to go away, I want to stay with you.." Jisung felt the other's voice tremble and immediately stated to comfort him, not wanting him to start crying again.

"You won't have to leave Lixie, I promise you this, you'll stay with us, don't worry."

Felix nodded slightly, calming back down.

He brushed his nose on Jisung's neck, starting to scent him, but was interrupted by a voice behind him.

"Uhm, Felix" he turned around and saw Seungmin at the doorframe.

Why was he outside? Didn't he want to enter the nest? Didn't he like his nest?

Felix frowned while looking at him, which made Seungmin rethink of his actions, scared to have done something to anger him.

"I brought you water honey" he finally said after rechecking mentally everything and coming to the conclusion that he didn't do anything wrong.

"I don't want water." He said with a firm voice, still confused and angry as why seungmin wouldn't come there.

"Felix you need to drin-"

"Why are you there?" Felix interrupted him, and Jisung, on contriary of Seungmin who looked even more worried and confused, finally understood what the omega meant.

"He wants you to come in Minnie" Jisung said while caressing Felix's back.

"Oh-" Seungmin nodded and immediately entered the nest, careful to not move anything as he rested the glass of water on the ground.

Felix crawled off Jisung's legs and went to Seungmin, tugging on his shirt and pulling it off.

"Yeah no shirts allowed here" Jisung giggled as he looked at Felix who was fixing the shirt between a pillow cover and some pants.

When Felix was finally satisfied after moving some clothes he went to sit back on Jisung's legs, hugging him and looking over at Seungmin.

"Felix would you drink just this glass of water? You need to stay hydrated baby"

Felix nodded slightly after thinking about it and grabbed the glassed, gulping down the water until it was finished.

He put the glass back down and snuggled up into Jisung's arms, going back to scenting him as he rubbed his nose on his scent glands.

The beta whimpered a bit at the sensation but let the other continue till he was satisfied. He then went on Seungmin's legs and did the same to him.

He actually felt comfortable now, he felt safe.

"What?" The four alphas looked shocked.

They sat at the table, Minho was preparing breakfast while Hyunjin told them everything.

"Now Jisung and Seungmin are with him, I honestly think we should move him out of there since the closet is way too small, but we can't force him and it would be best if he didn't see you for a while. He was really scared of letting us near him and he was terrorized at the thought of you in the house"

Chan sighed, trying to metabolize everything, then he nodded.

"Alright, we'll keep distance, we can move him to my studio, I haven't used it in months anyway, we just need to tidy up first"

"Wait but.. I want to help somehow..." Jeongin said, looking worried.

"It's best if you don't go close to him until it's over Jeonginnie, you presented recently so you risk of losing control and we can't have that now, he's still healing and we need to demonstrate that he'll be safe here even while in heat" Hyunjin calmly explained. "Of course we'll talk to him while he's still lucid to see if you can help him somehow, but if he doesn't want you near you stay away even if he begs you while in heat"

"Yeah.. he told me he was raped by his old pack, said that he craved them at the moment but that he actually hated it and that they disgusted him when the heat was over."

"God that's so fucked up.. ok, this was totally unexpected and we're unprepared but we need to do our best, I'll talk to the company so you Seungmin and Jisung can stay home until everything's over, it's better to not leave him alone."

Hyunjin nodded while Minho prepared eight plates of food.

"I prepared breakfast, bring him to eat and make sure he eats at least half of it." Hyunjin then nodded again and he grabbed the plate for felix and three more for him and the other two betas, he also took a bottle of water.

"We'll talk more when you get back, don't worry about anything if something happens we'll just call you"

He carefully walked to the closet with the plates balanced on his arms and hands and the bottle of water in the front pocket of his sweater.

When he reached the closet he looked at Felix. He didn't question why they were all half naked since he knew omegas craved skin to skin touch when in heat.

"Felix can I enter?" he asked, waiting patiently at the entrance.

When the younger nodded he carefully got inside and sat the four plates on the ground with the water bottle beside them.

"Minho hyung made breakfast, we should eat before it cools off" he said as he took off his sweater and gave it to felix.

After the boy fixed his nest once more he gave him a plate. 

"eat Lixie" 

"Mmh.. You first" the boy said and hyunjin nodded, starting to eat, the other two betas followed right after and they ate as Felix stared at them, making sure that they wouldn't stop, before actually taking his plate and starting to eat himself.

When they all finished they drank some water and Hyunjin let Felix sit on his lap.

"Lixie Chan said that we can move upstairs in a bigger room, would you like to?"

Felix looked at him skeptical before nodding.

"Alright baby, we just need to clean up a bit, why don't we stay here while Jisung and Seungmin clean it?'

Felix nodded again and rested his head on his chest.

"Hey! Why do we have to clean?? It's not fair!" Jisung complained but helped Seungmin grab the empty plates.

"You'll see Hwang Hyunjin!" He stated as they walked out.

"That kid" Hyunjin giggled and Felix ignored them, starting to scent the beta instead.

The older let him, caressing his hair and tilting his head to give him more space.

"Baby the alphas really really want to help you during your heat, of course they won't do anything you don't like but can they do something for you?"

Felix shivered and shook his head.

"Don't want them.. please..."

"Ok Lixie, they won't come close, promise."

Felix nodded slightly and started kissing Hyunjin's neck.

"Lixie.. can I ask you something?"

"Mh..?"

"Yesterday... when we were in the practice room, your eyes were bright purple. I never saw an omega do that, why did it happen?"

"Mh... I don't know... It never happened, it was the first time.." the omega answered, continuing to kiss his neck, the other just nodded and looked down at him.

They stared at each other's eyes for some minutes, losing themselves in the moment, before they just started leaning closer and closer.

"Is.. Is it ok..?" Felix asked while looking at Hyunjin's lips as he moved closer, only mere millimeters separating them now.

"It's more then okay.." Hyunjin whispered, leaning over completely and letting their lips meet.

They kissed slowly and romantically. No tongue involved.

It was just pure.. love.

It was pure love.

And they loved each other so much that they just spent the next 10 minutes kissing on the floor of a dirty closet while they waited for the betas to come back.