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Caroline knows a lot of things. She knows she is an only child. She knows she is the biggest disappointment of her fathers life. She knows she's apparently not worth sticking around for as proven by many people in her short life.
She knows her mother stays up at night worried about her but gets up and leaves in the morning without anything other than an "there's lasagna in the fridge from last night for dinner. I'll be back late."
She knows she likes being trusted and feeling in control.
What Caroline did not know was that she could be off the radar for 4 whole days and nobody would bat an eye. No missed calls, no texts, not even a voicemail.
Under normal circumstances and if you were in a normal friend group it would not be unusual to dissappear for a few days and pop up fine, but in Caroline's experience not being heard from for 4 days in Mystic Falls means you're either dead, dying, possessed or a hostage. So to say she was a bit pissed that nobody had noticed was an understatement.
Not that she was in any danger, she's fine. She's fine! She's totally, utterly and completely fine. That's the problem. She's always fine. She was fine after she got used and thrown about like a rag doll for Damon's amusement, left with a fog in her head she could never seem to shake. She was fine when she got thrust into a world of constant danger and fear and stress. She was fine when she got turned into a vampire and watched the whole life she had planned for herself come tumbling down. She was fine when every relationship she's ever had went to shit for some reason or another. She was fine when her dad tortured her. She was fine when her dad died refusing to be anything like her and she has been completely fine every time that she is never enough to keep anyone around.
She is tired of having to put on a brave face all the time, afraid to be one more burden to add to the never ending pile. She doesn't think that for one more minute she has it left in her to smile and be the bright eyed girl everyone always expects her to be when she doesn't feel happy or bright at all.
She feels like she has a huge weight on her chest and sometimes she genuinely feels like she can't breathe under the weight of it.
She doesn't think she can stand there and watch as all of her friends fawn over Elena and rally to her aid every time she so much as scrapes her knee. It drives her crazy. She hates herself for it.
She hates that all she can think of when she looks at Elena is how ungrateful she is. She has everybody wrapped around her little finger, waiting on her hand and foot. How she has a brother and barely has a relationship with him outside of saving each others lives, how she's pretty sure Bonnie would much prefer Elena's company over her own, how she has not one but two guys head over heels in love with her and she can't seem to pick a side. She has a community of people around her to support her. Caroline doesn't think she will ever have that. She lies awake at night thinking about it, what she wouldn't give.
So with her eternal heartache and soul eating guilt, she sits on her back steps nursing a cup of tea in her pyjamas at 7pm. God she really is a mess.
A mess that likes a good sunset at least, bit ironic when you consider the whole vampire sun thing but it reminds her of simpler times.
She used to have a wooden play house out here when she was a kid.
It was pink and purple and she remembers helping her Dad paint it by leaving her hand print in the bottom left corner right on top of his, a maker's mark he had told her. It's how you're remembered in years to come when you're long gone. She liked the idea of eternity then. In her Cinderella tutu and long blonde plaits, she sat on her little stool in her play house serving her Mom and Dad pretend tea through the hatch window. She thought then that she would like it very much.
A lot of things change.
Where her play house used to sit, now sits a neglected potted plant on a slightly dead patch of grass.
It never did grow back quite right after she had gone out the night after finding out her dad had left with a very large mallet and took it to the roof of her play house. She hadn't used it in years, it had weeds growing inside and spiders webs in the windows but she was too gone to care. With every bit of unsophisticated grace she had, she lit upon the play house and didn't stop until her hair was a mangled mess, she had splinters covering her arms top to bottom and the play house was nothing more than a suggestion to the sad pile of timber it now was. It was the first time she had ever let her rage out like that. It had felt great.
She thought briefly now that Klaus would have been proud of her if he had seen her that day.
He would have said something witty about letting your inner monster out and how he loved how she reveled in it, how once you get past the shame the fun begins. She thinks for a second that it would have been just what she needed to hear at that moment.
Instead she had heard nothing but the sound of her Mom in the bedroom crying, trying to keep it down for her sake. She went to bed and didn't talk to her friends for 3 weeks.
She thinks to herself that maybe this is what she does now, hides.
She doesn't want to do that anymore.
Her finger hovers over the contact "Klaus" on her phone for more than a minute until she presses call.
Maybe she'll leave a message, he's probably busy....doing whatever it is he does when he's not threatening people or siring hybrids, it's not like he has a job right?
The phone rings three times.
"Caroline." He says in a surprisingly cheery voice. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"
"Klaus! Um hi. Gosh I know this is super random and you're probably not interested-" It all came out in a ramble and she cursed her own tounge, resting her hand on her forehead
"but I was just thinking about stuff and you popped into my head and then I couldn't stop thinking about it and then I thought-"
"You know I always love to hear you're thinking about me." She can hear the smirk in his voice
"Who's dying now?" He asks in a curled way
"What? No no no one's dying. That I know of anyways."
"What can I do for you then, Caroline?"
"I- I ah" Stuttering and stopping. She calms herself and starts back off in a more confident tone.
"I was wondering if you'd like to come over? I have stuff here to make dinner, i could just.. really use a friend right now. And that's what we are. Friends. That is if you're not busy out there slaying dragons or whatever."
She waited.
"I have to say I'm surprised, you think I would fell a dragon? There are far less magnificent beasts out there to take my anger out upon I assure you. I am not heartless." He was teasing, she could tell.
She hit him right back.
"Is this your way of telling me dragons are real? She asked tilting her head to the side a bit
"Anything can be real if you set your mind to it, love." Klaus said softly
"I'll take your word for it."
"It would be my honour to have dinner with you, Caroline. How soon do you want me?"
He asks, she can hear him moving around over the phone.
"Now?"
"I'll be there as soon as possible. What are you making?" He said curiously
"Does carbonara meet your standards your highness?" She asked jokingly
"Of course it does, I've always had a soft spot for pasta. I find it quite romantic."
"I don't know if I'd call it romantic or not but I do have a weakness for carbs, sue me." She said huffing out a laugh, she hadn't done that in a while.
"I wouldn't dream of it. I will see you shortly Caroline." He said softly.
"Yeah, see you in a minute."
She could hear glass clanking together in the background of the call before she hung up. She wondered what it was.
When he showed up at her door less than 10 minutes later, with her still clad in her pyjamas, she understood.
He had brought a bottle of champagne, some fancy relic of a thing that probably cost more than her house. He held it up with one hand and wiggled it with a smirk creeping up on his face
"It's bad manners to show up empty handed now isn't it, love?"
It was their thing after all.