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Chapter Text

Prologue

Into The Unknown

Part 1

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‘Bzzt bzzt!’

Reaching into my coat pocket, gloved hands feel around for a buzzing cell phone. Pressing the power button, a funky email notification appears on screen.

🏆😾 𝕐𝔬υ ℍ𝔸Ｖ𝑒 ᗷ𝐄εᶰ αᑕⓒ𝔢ρ𝓉ｅｄ 𝐢𝐧ⓉＯ 𝐧ŕ𝐜 𝓒lเς𝓀 𝔫𝕠ʷ 🐠♔

‘Another damn spam email! I wish you would go away, persistent garbage.’ Swiping the no doubt virus riddled email in the trash I shove my phone back into my pocket with an aggravated sigh.

‘It’s been a week of blocking and reporting these nonsensical texts and yet it somehow miraculously overrides everything.’

‘Riiiiing!’

Whipping out my phone in annoyance, I already knew who would be calling.

🐸♣ ηⓘ𝓖𝒽𝕥 ⓡ𝔸𝓋Ⓔⓝ ℂØⓛᒪ𝐀𝓰є 🥨ൠ

𝔵ⓧ᙭ - Ⓧⓧ𝓧

‘Sorry secret siren but I’m blocking out your calls.’ Another report and block were made.

‘Such a weird scam, pretending to be a mobile game. I haven’t played that game in years, and I didn’t even finish it. Was the story ever completed anyway?’

Letting the disturbance go, you look up and take in the ambience of a serene winter’s night. You often strolled around on winter nights, finding the scene and atmosphere captivating. Trees fitted in ivory coats while their crystallized branches chimed in the wind, streetlights highlighting the snow shifting and sparking in such a way that it mimicked sand, and a chill that illuminates your breath, and reddens your face, all made you feel present. The only sounds to be heard are the crunches of your own footsteps and the odd car that drives by.

Removing your gloves you stop every so often to take photos, attempting to capture the beauty of nature. After a while, satisfied with tonight’s finds, you turn around to return home.

‘I can’t wait to put on warm fluffy clothes and drink an earl grey hot chocolate with whip cream and drizzle on top.’

Interrupted from your fantasy, you noticed something was off.

‘The moon is high in the sky but why is it getting darker?’

Turning around you watch in the distance as the streetlights slowly begin to fade. There’s a pattern you realize, every five seconds another light goes out getting closer to you. You turn away, face huddled into your scarf and resume walking.

‘I have enough time to make it home before getting caught up in the dark, I don’t think it’s a power outage, the way the lights are waiting to go out is too coincidental. Faintly it almost sounds like hooves and something with wheels are in the distance, but I don’t see anything… I’ve never seen a horse out this late either, but it’s too ‘cloppy’ to be a person.’

The lights begin to pick up their pace in going out, feeling unnerved you decide to run home and pray you don’t run into any icy spots and slip.

Your labored breathing and steps are magnified; you can’t imagine hearing anything else, but the noises seem to be getting louder.

‘I’m not looking back. I’m not looking back, I don’t want to know, I just want to go home.’

Unfortunately, you couldn’t outrun the darkness as all the lights have vanished in front of you. The absence of light doesn’t deter your speed and instead spurs you on more. You can see your house now, one right turn, fly up the stairs, get inside and lock the doors. You’re practically home free!

As you turn into your driveway a glowing green horse materializes right in front of you. Screaming at the sudden apparition you fall back not wanting to crash into the skeletal ghost. The horse lowers its head to your view and snorts green smoke, you feel nothing but fear.

‘WHAT IS THIS?! WHAT IS HAPPENING?!’

You scramble backwards on the ground and the ghost horse makes no move to follow. Rising from the ground you see the horse is connected to a low ebony cart with no rider.

The transparency of the cart leaves nothing to the imagination: the sides, front, and back are glass, with curtains tied up for viewing; what lies inside is a coffin.

‘Grim reaper horse?! Victorian carriage hearse?’

With adrenaline coursing through your system, you cannot help but voice your concerns loudly.

“What do you want?! I’m not dead yet and I don't plan to be any time soon!”

Turning away from the horse you run like the fires of hell are on your heels, but the horse elongates its neck, grabs hold of the back of your jacket and throws you over its shoulder.

“AHHHHHHHHHH!” You scream until your back slams through the carriage rooftop and into the coffin. Dazed with the wind knocked out of you, the lid creeps back over to seal you in. You pass out.

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Fading into consciousness you’re left with swirling thoughts.

‘Why do I feel so stiff? Why is it so stuffy?’

You try to sit up but find yourself alright upright causing you to hit your head against a wall.

‘???’

‘!!!’

“I’m in a box?! No the coffin! This is so much worse!”

Panic overtakes you as you fight against the confines of the lid. Kicking and pushing against the cover with all your might until finally a sliver of light floods in. Viciously you slide the cover off, stumbling out of the box and falling onto your knees.

“Fwaanya!”

Colliding into gray fur, the puff ball begins to berate you.

“What?! You ain't supposed to be awake! Tch. Whatever. You...human! Just gimme your uniform, and be quick about it!”

You were too focused on correcting your breathing, and trying to calm yourself to answer the talking cat. You noticed that your clothes had been swapped for black robes with purple accents and gold trimmings. The cat crawled out from under you, the blue flames from his ears burning brighter.

“Oh-ho! You got a lotta nerve ignoring me, human! The name's Grim. Believe me, you won't forget it! Now gimme your uniform, and be quick about it! 'Cause if you don't...you're gonna regret it!”

‘Grim? Grim from twst? Whatever is happening it looks like that little monster is about to launch a fireball at me! Even if this is some sort of deranged dream I’m not burning to find out!”

With your heart no longer ringing in your ears, you bolt out of the nearest exit; a stone archway leading into a dark hallway. The room you had awoken in was filled with similar dark coffins neatly placed vertically in rows, but now wasn’t the time to reminisce about the past.

You hear Grim chase after you, not particularly listening to his vague threats until you hear him let out a ‘me-OUCH’ and turn to see a man wearing a gaudy top hat with the top half of his face concealed by a raven mask, glowing yellow orbs where his eyes should be. He’s holding onto Grim and covering the little rascal’s mouth.

“Ah, I've found you at last. Splendid. I trust you're one of this year's new students? My, were you ever eager to make your debut. And bringing a poorly trained familiar with you? That is a clear violation of the school's rules.”

‘Good gracious that voice! This is headmaster Dire Crowley of Night Raven College! But this feels more compelling than a dream, am I actually in twst?? Why?’

“Dear me. Of all the students I've dealt with, you're the first with temerity enough to open their own gate and step out of it. Does the very notion of patience elude you? No matter. Your orientation has already begun. Let us return to the Mirror Chamber.”

Crowley makes a motion for me to walk with him so I follow not knowing what else to do as Grim continues to squirm and make muffled noises of protest in his hold.

I don’t know what to say so I’ll just remain silent, Crowley seems like the type of bird that likes to hear himself squawk so it’s fine right? But what gate? The coffin?

My confusion must be visible as Crowley opts to elaborate.

“You awakened in a room full of gates, did you not? All of the students here at the campus arrived by passing through such gates. Although typically the students have restraint enough to wait until I open them before waking up.”

Headmaster Crowley sounds a bit miffed at the inconvenience I’ve caused him, I’m a bit surprised. I remember him being just so goofy. From his dramatic feathered and trinket cluttered attire and being a bit bird brained… I should probably keep my eyes out for Headmaster Crowley, he’s in charge of a prestigious school, I doubt he’s actually that dumb unless he’s a pawn like that crow from Maleficent.

“But now is not the time for such prattle. You've a student orientation to attend! Go on, now. Make haste.”

Headmaster Crowley makes a shooing motion with his hands as he follows me. Probably to make sure I don’t cause any more trouble. In order to blend in I’ll have to play along, which isn’t too difficult given how confused I still am.

“First just tell me one thing: Where am I?”

“Hm? Have you not fully regained consciousness? The timespace teleportation must have addled your memories… Well, these things happen, I suppose. I shall explain it to you while we walk. Truly, my magnanimity is boundless.”

‘Oh yeah, Headmaster Crowley’s ‘generosity’ knows no bounds, how could I forget or possibly be allowed to?’

I tune out the Headmaster for the most part, magical institution this, acting chairman that, blah blah blah. Walking through the ever winding hallways, a small cluster of students in ceremonial robes catches my eye. The Headmaster hasn’t noticed yet, too absorbed in his own praises, but the one with an orange bob, bright green eyes, and a red diamond painted under the left outer corner of his eye makes a ‘keep quiet’ gesture with his hand. I nod my head as he smiles and scurries off with his group. Looks like Cater Diamond and a few other miscreants from his dorm were ditching orientation. “Hmmm? Has something caught your attention?” The Headmaster asks, following my gaze to stare at the end of the hall where Cater had been. “Yes, you mentioned something about a ‘dark mirror’ could you elaborate?”

“Of course! Only those who the Dark Mirror perceives as having a talent for magic are admitted to the college. Those who are selected are summoned to the campus through those "gates," which can appear anywhere. A black carriage bearing one such gate should have come to meet you.”

‘Did the Dark Mirror make a mistake though? As far as I remember ‘Yu’ never acquires magic or magical abilities? And if the lesson is some silly ass shit like ‘friendship was the real magic all along’ I’ll throw up. I doubt it’s that type of game but still.’

“I don’t think I’ll ever forget that frightening horse.” I grab my arms and shudder.

“That black carriage serves to receive a student chosen by the Dark Mirror. It too bears a gate that connects to this campus. And as you know, sending a carriage to meet someone on a special day is a time-honored tradition.”

“So this carriage dragged me here against my will?”

I mean lets be real, we already knew this but I think it bears repeating.

Headmaster Crowley poignantly ignores me as Grim fervently struggles to shake the Headmaster’s grip.

“Now, let us attend to your orientation.”

We certainly took the long way around to enter the ceremony, wherever the ‘display room’ was, through the hallway, into the library, out to the courtyard, entering through the front iron gates past the parked hearses, and now in front of the grand oak doors… I really must be out of it thinking the Headmaster was going to be subtle and take us through the side door and not the main entrance.

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Chapter Text

Prologue

Into The Unknown

Part 2

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Headmaster Crowley made great fanfare in flinging open the doors, but none of the few remaining people inside paid us any mind. All the inhabitants also wore the same robes you were, you chalked it up to being a ceremonial thing.

Seeing the game in real life sure is freaky, floating mirrors and coffins are abundant in this space.

"We're done with orientation and dorm assignments? All right, new students—let me be clear. At Heartslabyul House, I am the law. Break the rules, and it's off with your head!"

'Oh my it's the housewardens, Riddle is as 'enthusiastic' as ever...'

"Hey, does anyone know where the headmage went? He disappeared midway through the ceremony..." Vil turned with an elegant flip of his blonde purple ombre hair to the group of prefects.

"Some headmage he is."

If floating tablets could eye roll, this one certainly would be.

"Maybe he had a tummyache?"

Hahaha, Idia and Kalim get his ass.

"I most certainly did not! If you must know, I was searching for the new student who'd failed to show for orientation." The Headmaster fumed.

Turning to me he continued, "You are the only one who has yet to be assigned a dorm. Step up to the Dark Mirror, and be quick about it. I'll watch your weasel."

Walking up the short concrete stairs, I stand in the center of the platform staring at the Dark Mirror. The Dark Mirror is practically the Evil Mirror from Snow White but wears an intricate black detailed mask over his eyes.

"State your name." The Dark Mirror speaks.

'I really don't think it would be wise for me to say my real name now that I'm here, uhh most people here are named from which fairytale they hail from either blatantly or in reference... Can't take any of theirs for inspiration...'

"My name is Thorn Silvanus."

'Thorn in reference to my favorite ballet, and Silvanus is just Latin for 'forest.' I don't know for certain if I have taken the role of MC here, I could be sorted into a house.'

"Thorn...The nature of your soul is...

......

......

...unclear to me."

Stunned gasps and murmurs filled the air.

The Headmaster balks "What did you just say?"

Damn looks like I really am the MC but was there ever any doubt?

The Dark Mirror carries on, "I sense no magical power from this one. Soundless. Colorless. Shapeless. Utterly vacant. Therefore, no dorm would be appropriate."

"Are you suggesting that the black carriage went to receive a person who cannot even use magic? But that is absurd! The student selection process has not erred once in its century of existence! How could this have happened?" The Headmaster was dumbfounded, as was everyone else in the room.

Of course not all who heard the news were shell shocked, Grim hearing this had new found vigor and escaped the Headmaster's hold.

"ME! Let ME have this student's seat! Unlike that human, I can actually use magic! So let me be a student here! Look, I'll show you! My spells are the cat's meow!"

"Not so fast, you little hyperactive weasel!" The Headmaster admonished, but it was too late.

"Everyone get down!" Riddle yelled as Grim began to set the room ablaze in blue flames, he even caught Kalim's but on fire!

"Ugh... Can I go now, or?" Leona asked nonchalantly with a yawn.

"Oh? I thought you fancied yourself a hunter. Go and help yourself to that plump little morsel!" Vil prodded at Leona.

Leona's tail flicked irritability "Too much effort. Do it yourself."

Panicked voices and people filtered out of the room as it continued to be filled with Grim's blue flames and Kalim's pleas to save his butt.

"Would someone catch that blasted animal before it sets the entire school ablaze!" Headmaster Crowley shouted over the chaos.

Azul stepped up to the task prepared to farm participation credits and take responsibility. And by responsibility he meant asking Riddle to use his unique magic to stop the small cat devil and taking some of the credit. A businessman through and through.

Azul and Riddle took out their fountain pens which doubled as their magic wands and eventually cornered Grim and put an end to his fiery reign. Riddle used his unique magic 'Off With Your Head' and a heart shaped collar with a lock materialized around Grim's neck sealing his magic.

"Fwnya?! What are you doing?" Grim asked, trying to pry the collar off with his paws and forked tail.

"Thorn! Was I not clear that you are expected to take responsibility for your familiar? Now discipline your—"

"Headmaster Crowley I've never claimed this creature as my familiar."

"What's that? It isn't yours?"

That took the wind out of his sails.

"Ahem. Then I shall have it expelled from campus. I shall even spare it from being served as dinner. For I AM kind... Someone take this away, please."

The Headmaster scuffed Grim by his new collar and held him away from his body. A npc from the Heartslabyul dorm took Grim and marched him off somewhere, to be kicked out I assume.

"Nooooo! Let me gooooo! You fools better remember my name! Cause I'm gonna go down in the annals of magic history! Just you wait!" Grim whined and his eyes looked like they would burst any minute.

This is just too pitiful! Poor Grimmy! I know he's a bit rough around the edges, but who wouldn't crumble at such a cute animal all things considered.

I couldn't help but ask out loud to no one in particular "I wonder why he's so desperate to stay here?"

"Well, that was quite the unexpected fracas. I hereby declare that orientation has concluded. Housewardens, please escort your students back to the dorms....Hm? Come to think of it, I don't see Housewarden Draconia of House Diasomnia anywhere" The Headmaster stated.

"And that surprises you? Dude's a total recluse." The Housewarden of Savanaclaw supplied.

Truthfully I'm more surprised the lazy lion beastmen Leona is still here.

"Wait a sec... Did anyone even invite him?" Kalim the Housewarden of Scarabia gasped wide eyed at his own revelation.

Vil quick on a comeback said, "If you're that worried about him missing out, maybe you should have told him yourself."

Man this is just sad for Malleus, I kinda forget why Malleus is excluded. Is it his reputation in society being so high? Or is his magical aura just too intense to be in his presence? But then again how hard is it to send him an email? Idia, Housewarden of Ignihyde, uses a tablet as his vessel of choice. Azul, Housewarden of Octavinelle, claims it is not a snub on their part, but like c'mon guys.

Everyone exits the area following their respective Housewarden into their assorted dorm to start their new way of life at Night Raven Collage.

Headmaster Crowley approaches me "Well, Thorn. This is a most unfortunate turn of events. I'm afraid that you will not be attending Night Raven Collage after all. Surely you realize that I cannot very well admit a student with no magical ability to my academy. But worry not. The Dark Mirror will see you safely home. Now, step into the gate, and visualize the place from whence you came."

"Oh thank heavens for that." I don't know how I would cope trying to live in this world starting from scratch and alone, it sounds so daunting. I wonder if everyone in this universe has magic? I'd be like an alien to these people.

I stand in the center of the platform once more, however the Dark Mirror's face does not appear.

"O Dark Mirror! Return this soul where it belongs!"

...

...

No response. Feeling flustered, Headmaster Crowley tries again, but the Dark Mirror interrupts.

"There is no such place in this world where this soul belongs. None. Therefore, I cannot return them." The Dark Mirror states matter of factly.

"How can that be? My, my. But today is a veritable cavalcade of impossible phenomena! This has never happened throughout my long tenure. I must confess that I am at something of a loss. Tell me: From what land do you hail?"

"I'm from xx country of xx city."

I wasn't sure if mentioning 'I'm from the planet Earth' would be relevant or not. Sure I've never heard of this place being real in my world aside from being a fictional land from a video game, but I also never got too deep in the game's lore.

"I'm afraid I am not familiar with such a place. I am intimately acquainted with the origins of every student who has ever come here, and yet... This mysterious homeland of yours eludes me. Let us go to the library and look it up, shall we?"

Headmaster Crowley guides me back to the library. There isn't much to note on the architecture in the hallways, just your run of the mill castle and dark academia aesthetic.

Headmaster Crowely expertly began collecting contents of the library and amassing a historical haul of maps and books laid out on a long table. As he skimmed and cross referenced the historical texts, I explored the two storied library.

Some book titles were familiar: a Tale of Two Cities, Romeo and Juliet, some were vaguely familiar: The Sea Witch's Business Philosophy, The King of the Underworld Untold, and some were not: Potionology for the Beginner Sorcerer, and Animal Languages the Do's and Don'ts Volume 5.

"Just as I'd suspected. Nothing. Not only is your homeland not listed on any map from any point in history, I've never heard of it and I am quite knowledgeable on the subject of history and geography."

Headmaster Crowley raised from his studious lean and turned to watch me climb down the second story ladder.

"Now, are you QUITE sure that you come from such a place? That wasn't some sort of lie, or joke? Because if so, the only explanation is that you've come from another planet. Or perhaps you were summoned here from another dimension?"

'Okay. I'm going to have to come to terms with that this isn't some sort of hot chocolate induced nightmare.This is real. But I never finished the game so I have no idea if the protagonist ever got to go home or if there was a reason why the protagonist was summoned in the first place or how long they stayed! AHHHHHHH!'

Interrupting my internal screaming, I try to comfort myself.

'Wait a minute. This is an otome game right? And its fairytale-esque, therefore, the protagonist probably falls in love and is forced home with a bittersweet ending! This is fine! I wonder if time passes the same in my world though... Oh man Crowley's staring at me I better say something.'

"Another dimension!? How is this possible?" I don't sound as worked up as I feel, I hope.

"Show me everything that you brought here with you. Do you have some form of identification, a driver's license perhaps? Or even a...shoe? You do seem a tad bit...empty-handed." Headmaster Crowley looked at me sheepishly.

"Well before I woke up in that "gate" I was wearing my winter gear, and my phone was in my pocket. I don't want to get into who changed me, but wherever my clothes may be... I don't know where they are."

"Well, this is quite the predicament. I cannot have someone with no aptitude for magic bumbling about my magic academy. And yet, as an educator, I am loath to expel a young person without a cent to their name, or any ability to contact their guardian... Truly, my grace is boundless. Hmmmmm... Ah!

There is a vacant building on this campus. It was, in fact, used as a dorm a long time ago. With a proper cleaning, it should be habitable enough. Out of the profound kindness of my heart, I will allow you to live there for the time being. In the meantime, we will investigate other ways to send you home.

Dear me, but I am a gracious man indeed! A model educator, one might say. Well then, I shall take you to your dorm straight away. It is an older building, but it has plenty of...character, one might say."

'So there was an eighth dorm? I wonder which villain got the cut or why it was abandoned? Man this literally the least of the LEAST Crowley could do, honestly. Man, am I going to have to convince one of the staff members to adopt me so I can in theory have access to running water and safe lodging and be eligible to work and acquire government IDs? Ahhhh, what a pain to think about.'

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Chapter Text

Prologue

Into The Unknown

Part 3

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Trailing along the silver and black cobblestone path, with short rounded streetlamps, the Headmaster stops at a building that gives off the same vibe as that mansion from that Eddie Murphy movie: haunted.

With a push of a rusted gate that leaves red flakes in its squeaky movement, the Headmaster opens the front door and ushers me inside revealing a room that no living creature could find pleasant. With dust, cobwebs, spots, water damage, broken and torn furniture and housing alike, this place was teetering on abysmal. I know it's useless but I must voice my protest.

"Headmaster there's character and then there's an OSHA violation, and this is the latter."

With a flick of his jewel covered gloves, the Headmaster announces "There. That should keep the elements at bay for the time being. Now, I should return to my research. Do try to find some way to busy yourself. But don't let me catch you wandering the campus! Ta! Ta!"

"There's quite literally not even a place to sit." I say quietly to myself staring a hole into the torn couch.

I've got my work cut out for me in more ways than one... Well it's not like I'm unused to hardships, I can do without most things, doesn't mean I like it though. I've always been resourceful and crafty, and if I can even make just one friend with someone... Even if I can't, I'll be fine. I haven't any choice but to be if I want to rescue myself. Crowley won't put that much effort into helping me return home, it makes me wonder about my theory; is he a pawn that someone higher than him needs me here?

"Gwahhh! It's pouring out there!"

Grim jumps through the open window next to me, his splat and shaking to get dry gets water all over myself making it look like we both just came in from the pouring rain. I spit out the flung water and wipe off my face.

"Bwahaha! That look on your face is priceless! Like a bat that got blasted by a water gun. As if I wouldn't just sneak back onto campus the second I escaped pryin' eyes. You all got no idea what I'm capable of! I ain't givin' up on goin' here just 'cause I got kicked out one measly ol' time. And if you think otherwise, you don't know Grim!"

I know I'm stuck with the cocky weasel, but might as well torment my future friend.

Cupping my hands around my mouth in dramatic fashion I call out "Guards! Guarrrds!"

"Hey! No! Bad human! BAD HUMAN! Ain't you gonna ask what I'm doin' here? That's what you people do, right? Talk about feelings and stuff? Just what kinda human are ya, anyway? It wouldn't kill ya to listen to me! Right?!"

Grim wags his paw at me and shifts around avoiding the water droplets that seep through the ceiling.

"I was born to do this! I'm a magical prodigy who's got the makin's to become one of the greatest mages who ever lived! So I've been waitin' and waitin' for that black carriage to come for me. And yet...

Hrmph! That Dark Mirror's got no eye for talent! That's why I took the initiative and came here myself. You humans don't understand what a mistake you're makin'! Not lettin' me in is a great loss to the world! Mrrao! C'mon, scoot over! I'm getting dripped on here! Bwah! Another hole in the roof! These flamin' ears are like my trademark, y'know? I can't let 'em get doused!"

Crossing my arms I state the obvious to Grim "Good luck with that, this place is riddled with holes, if you haven't noticed the state of this dorm."

"I dunno why you don't just magic those holes away. You could have it fixed in half a jiff. Ahhh, right. You can't use magic at all. Pffft, man you're useless." Grim looked smug, like he had just won a battle of wits, but how quickly he forgets, he just told on himself that he can't fix the holes either.

"Grim, why don't you just magic away the holes then if it's such a bother?"

"Hah? You want ME to help YOU? Ha! You got the wrong idea. I'm just a stranger takin' shelter from the rain. You ain't the boss of me. If ya had some cans of tuna to trade, well, that'd be another story. But I don't work for free."

'No one works for free indeed. But these leaks are getting out of control, I can't just let them accelerate the floor's rot. There aren't enough buckets in the world to get all the holes. Ughhhhh.'

A loud creak and a slamming of a door echoes from a shabby hallway. 'Great the white blanket ghosts ed, edd, and eddy are making their debut.'

Grim almost jumps out of his fur with the noise, a ghost appears in a fit of laughter.

"We haven't had visitors in ages! I'm just itching for some new friends!"

Running through the hallways Grim screams "AHHHH! GHOSTS! A GHOST!"

I follow after Grim in case he causes more destruction, more ghosts awaken and follow us.

"All the people who used to live here got scared of us and ran away."

"We just want a new ghost to play with. Whaddaya say buddy?"

Did these ghosts just threaten to unalive us? Holy hell these numbnuts are evil. Too bad for them I ain't afraid of no ghosts. I'll square up. Grim is afraid though. Grabbing onto my robe and visibly shaking he puts on a brave front and tells the ghosts off.

"I'm a master sorcerer! I ain't afraid of any dumb ghosts! Mywaa!" Grim attacks them indiscriminately and misses all the shots he takes as the ghosts carry on taunting him.

"Oh for goodness sake Grim! Are you shooting with your damn eyes closed? You carry on like this, we won't have a roof over our heads!"

"Shaddup! I don't need a lip from no human!'

"Would you defeat the ghosts for a scooby snack?"

The ghosts and Grim continued in their dance of 'hit-and-miss.'

Damn no dice. I'll have to help Grim.

"Grim, I'll help you."

"Mrraoo! Human, tell me which way the ghosts are!"

"Incoming on your left. Doge right! Behind you - two of them!"

"Mwhaha! Lets go human! Lets clear out the 'lot of em!"

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Grim and I worked seamlessly together, with my guidance and his magical flames the ghosts were no match for us. The remainder of ghosts who were not burned vacated in a flurry of pleas.

Back where we started, I couldn't help but celebrate that we somehow survived a potential assassination via a ghost hoard.

"That was incredible Grim! We were incredible!"

"I was so scared - I mean pffft. I ain't afraid of no ghosties! Just a walk in the park for someone of my caliber."

Hearing the door open behind us, Grim and I looked back in surprise, Headmaster Crowley had returned!

"Good evening. In another gesture of my immense kindness, I have brought you dinner."

Carrying a gray cloche, the Headmaster only looked up after revealing the meal that lay underneath. Once he took notice of Grim he was flabbergasted to say the least.

"Wait. That's the creature we ejected for causing trouble at orientation! What is it doing here?!"

"Takin' care of yer ghost problem, that's what! You're welcome by the way." Grim proclaimed 'modestly.'

"On that topic, I do seem to recall that this dorm had a mischievous ghost problem. Ah, yes... That's why it was abandoned, in fact. The ghosts scared away all the students." Headmaster Crowley said, handing me the dinner plate.

"Well, Grim and I eradicated the dorm's ghost problem." I have no idea what this gray stuff on my plate is, but after sampling I must admit it was delicious.

"Would you be so kind as to demonstrate your ghost-eradication method?"

"One: no, 'cause I wiped em all out, two: no, 'cause where's my TUNA!"

"I will play the part of the ghosts. As for the tuna, you'll receive it when you defeat me. Oh, what generosity, Crowley... Now, to chug this transmutation potion!"

I'm mildly concerned that Headmaster Crowley just happened to have a transmutation potion on him, which makes me wonder what else he has up his sleeves.

"Ah, you gotta be kiddin' me. I gotta work together with the human again?"

"Grim your whining lost its cuteness two chapters ago, this could be your chance to enroll and become a proper student! So get to work kitty!"

"Hmpth! And don't call me kitty!"

Headmaster Crowley downs the potion with excitement and transforms into a wispy blue ghost. Our battle against the Headmaster starts!

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Even though Grim puts up such resistance to putting in effort and following rules, in battle he really pulls through. I have faith that Grim will obey my commands and it almost feels natural to mentor and lead, I'm not that surprised though, I've been surrounded by various animals and people of all sorts of ages and cultures my whole life. I like bringing out the best in people.

By the time Grim and I have won against Headmaster Crowley we're both a panting mess while the Headmaster looks no worse for wear.

"Incredible... I've never seen anyone bend a monster to their will quite the way you have. I must confess, my educator's intuition did sense something about you after the brouhaha at orientation, Thorn. I could tell you had a certain animal trainer-y, beast master-ish quality to you. Oh, yes. That said, I... *mumble mumble*"

''Brouhaha'? How old is this fossil? Oh no we lost the old man to his mutterings, now's my chance to ask something of him; he's in a state where he'd be most likely to agree.'

"Headmaster, would it be possible for Grim to stay with me?"

"What a MONSTER stay HERE??" Headmaster Crowley spun around on his heels to face Grim and I.

"Whoa... Did you just...?" Grim was too stunned to whine or boast.

'Headmaster Crowley already holds curiosity towards us, and I'm used to getting what I want. If I act cute now I'll nail him.'

"Please sir." I ask gently.

"Hmmm... I suppose I cannot deny your plea. Very well."

"Mrryao? For real?"

"Let me be clear! Under no circumstances would I admit anyone to Night Raven College who has not been selected by the Dark Mirror - especially not a monster! Nor do I intend to allow you, Thorn, to freeload until you're able to return home. Now, allow me to explain. It was the Dark Mirror that transported you here. Therefore this school does bear some responsibility for your well-being. So I will allow you to remain in this dorm, free of charge. However, you will need to pay for your own food, clothing, and incidentals. As to how you will do so, penniless as you are... Ah. Ah ha. Yes, a fine plan."

Grim looked like he was about to throw up from the sound of all that work and responsibility that would be thrust upon us, I couldn't blame him.

I have no idea if or what the work Crowley will ask of me pays or not. So I have to live with a somewhat dicky animal for a roommate, attend school (probably need good grades too), get another source of income, research and possibly solve how to bring myself home, take care of all the house affairs including repairs...

"What exactly are you planning to make me do?" I cross my arms and scrutinize the Headmaster.

"You needn't look so alarmed. I'm simply going to ask you to do a few odd jobs around campus. From what you've done here, Thorn, I can tell you know your way around a broom. So what do you say to you two working together as a janitorial team? If you agree to that, I will make a special exception and allow you to remain on campus. I'll also allow you use of the library, so that you may study, and research ways to return home. How soundlessly charitable I am. Ah, but only when your work is over, of course!"

I think I'm about to turn into that Daft Punk song 'work is never over.' Am I some sort of Cinderella? Snow White? This sure is a rough deal, but I haven't a choice do I? I need to stay here in some capacity to accomplish my goals, I was brought here so something here would probably bring me back.

"Whaaat? What kinda deal is that?! I wanna put on one of those sweet uniforms and be a student, not sweep up people's junk!"

Oh we're not students yet, hmm.

"If you're not satisfied with my offer, I can arrange to have you thrown out again." Headmaster Crowley supplied while taking away my now empty plate.

"Myah?! ... All right, fine! Let's do it."

"Alright Headmaster, I agree to your terms."

"Wonderful. Then I beseech you both... To work hard as the newest members of the Night Raven College's janitorial staff!"

With a swish of his cape, Headmaster Crowley exits the ramshackle dorm, leaving Grim and I alone once more.

I turn to Grim unsure of what to do now. "I guess we should investigate upstairs and see what we're working with for sleeping arrangements tonight."

"Dibs on the big bed - Fwnnya!"

With a swat of my hand I flung Grim back and raced for the steps. There is NO WAY Grim is getting any claim on anything, he's bratty enough!

On the steps Grim and I pushed and shoved each other side to side, a railing was lost in the commotion but we paid it no mind, until we arrived in the upstairs hallway. It's a race to see who can find the biggest bedroom first! Fortune is on my side as the first door I open reveals a decent size bedroom with no visible discernible issues, aside from being old and dusty. I jump into the bed with an eruption of dust and coughing. I pull up my hood to protect my head from the dirt.

"Hey! What's the big idea?! I did all the ghost bustin' work, I get the big bed! And I ain't sharing with you."

I stick out my tongue at Grim "sleep on the chair over there, or better yet another room, I promise you I don't want to share a bed with a cat anymore than you do with me."

"I AIN'T NO CAT!"

... Sometime in the night, whether it was from the draft, the unexplainable noises, or the weight of the world, somehow Grim and Thorn found themselves sharing the big bed.

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Chapter Text

Prologue

Into The Unknown

Part 4

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Sunlight filters in through the old frosted windows, illuminating the room, but that isn't what stirs Grim and I from our slumber.

"Hee hee hee... Aren't the two of you supposed to be off cleaning the school today?" Ghost A questions.

'Hmm? Who said... That?' I drowsily think but ultimately go back to sleep.

"Mmmmm... Nngh... Five more minutes, Ma..." Grim sleepily muttered.

"Go ahead, sleep the day away. And you might not eeever hafta wake up again." Ghost B jokes.

"Just like us! Ah ha ha ha ha ha!" Ghost C bellows.

"Myah?! The ghosts are back! Hey, Thorn, up and at 'em!"

Grim turbo launched himself at my abdomen and I flew up out of bed with a start.

"I'm awake! I'm awake! Gwah! Ghosts again?!"

Grim and I were ready for another ghost attack, but instead the ghosts just laughed at how serious we were explaining they were just a couple of pranksters.

"We gotta get rid of these things for good!"

"Couldn't agree with you more Grimmy," I got off the bed and was about to cross the threshold until I bumped into Headmaster Crowley.

"Can we have any privacy that lasts more than five seconds? Sheesh."

Ignoring my comment, the Headmaster smiled "Good morning Thorn, did you sleep well?"

Grim was quick on the uptake to voice his complaints "Not at all! When I sprawled out on the bed, the mattress fell right through the frame! Exactly how ramshackle IS this dorm? And worse yet, we got woken up by ghosts!"

"The sleep and the wakeup call was lovely." I say with a mock smile.

"I am delighted to hear that you've adjusted so well, despite being sent to another world!"

I'm going to roll my eyes into the sun, tactless bird, "Don't they have sarcasm where you're from?"

"Now, speaking of moving on, let us discuss your assignment for today."

Oop. Struck a nerve there perhaps.

The Headmaster makes his way back down the stairs into the lounge while I make my way to the bathroom to make myself feel and look somewhat more presentable.

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"Your job today is to clean the campus. That said, the campus is vast, and without magic, it'd be quite the Herculean task to clean it all. Therefore, today I'll have you focus on the area spanning from the front gates to the library.

Now, Thorn... I do expect that you'll keep a close eye on Grim, lest he cause another incident like yesterday."

"Headmaster, I'll try, but I have no control over the sentient hairball." I give Grim a side eye.

"HEY!?'

"Do not fail me. You may take your lunch in the cafeteria. I eagerly await the fruits of your labor."

The Headmaster took his leave once more, I noticed a janitorial outfit neatly folded on the couch.

'I know he said ''take your lunch in the cafeteria'' but somehow I doubt he means the food will be free of charge, and if that's the case I doubt I'll have access to a washing machine for free either, the water is spotty and questionable here. I guess I could find a river to wash my ceremonial robes in and hope for sunny weather to dry them.'

"Hrmph. I ain't cleanin' nothin'! I'm here to study magic so I can be blastin' off spells left and right! Like BAM! POW! FWOOM!" Grim made a great show of miming a fight scene.

"We can study right after work is over."

"Hmmph."

Typical Grim behavior. I give pouty ears a can of tuna for breakfast and cop one for myself. It's fine for a person to eat right? This isn't like exclusively cat food?

Putting on my work gear and fashioning my hair out of my face, it's time to conquer cleaning!

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Main street was wide and held an air of prestige with seven statues known as 'The Great Seven' outlining the entrance. Taking in all the details of the craftsmanship of these mascots could rival Michelangelo's artistry.

"Wow, so this is Main Street, huh? This is incredible! I didn't get to see it much yesterday. What's the deal with these seven statues? All their faces look pretty scary. Like, this lady here looks like she's got some reeeal anger management issues." Grim said standing in front of the first statue.

Scanning the inscriptions on the statues I walk through and read off the main points to Grim.

"Each statue correlates with a dormitory here based off of the classic Disney villains and their theme:

the Queen of Hearts is the representative of Heartslabyul and is based of the spirit of strictness,

Scar is the representative of Savanaclaw and is based off of the spirit of persistence,

Ursula is the representative of Octavinelle and is based off of the spirit of benevolence,

Jafar is the representative of Scarabia and is based off of the spirit of mindfulness,

The Evil Queen is the representative of Pomefiore and is based off of the spirit of tenacity,

Hades is the representative of Ignihyde and is based off of the spirit of diligence,

And finally, Maleficent is the representative of Diasomina and is based off of the spirit of nobility."

"Whoa whoa whoa, that is not how you introduce The Great Seven, here let someone who actually knows what they're talking about take the lead before you hurt yourself."

Yippie! Ace-hole has arrived, I really thought I could speed run this and avoid Ace's mischief. I suppose being a main character entails that you're confined to the expectations of the plot, certain plot points must be hit, but at least I still have the illusion of free will and can be myself, sorta.

Ace acts like he's doing us a tremendous service and walks us back to the beginning to spin us a yarn on the lore of these Twisted Wonderland legends that Grim and I shan't soon forget.

"The Queen of Hearts? She was a queen who lived in a mazelike garden of roses long, long ago. She was a strict woman who prized order above all. She wouldn't tolerate a rose being off-color, or her playing-card soldiers being out of step. She basically ruled over a kingdom of madness, but not one of her subjects dared to defy her. You wanna know why? Because the punishment for breaking a rule was immediate decapitation!"

'Not to rain all over the Queen of Hearts parade, but wasn't there a 'White Queen' in that land too? I'll admit I don't know how she ruled her queendom but the atmosphere was much lighter, not so tyrannical.'

"Pretty cool, right? I'm a big fan. I mean, who would bother to obey a queen that was kind all the time?" Ace smiled.

"That's messed up! But, yeah, true. A leader needs to be strong. But puttin' that aside... Who're you, now?' Grim asked, tilting his head to the side.

"Name's Ace. I'm a first year student here, as of... today! Pleased to meetcha!"

"I'm Grim! I'm a prodigy whos plannin' to be, like, the greatest mage who ever lived.That there's my far less interesting hench-human."

"I'm not anyone's hench-anything you menace, my name is Thorn Silvanus."

"Thorn Silvanus? Name's got an odd ring to it."

'Ya, everyone's names here are all equally 'odd' let's just let bygones be bygones.'

Ace carries on with his tour.

"Here's the King of Beasts who ruled the savanna. But he wasn't born into the throne - he had to earn it through hard work and elaborate schemes. When he became king, he decreed that the hyenas would be pariahs no more, and should live among his subjects as equals."

'That's certainly a positive way to look at it. Isn't history and publications interesting in that way? The things we take as historical accuracy all depends on whose side you're on and the intentions behind it. Of course take my musings with a grain of salt as I am referencing Disney movies and not Twst's history.'

"The Sea Witch who lived in an underwater grotto. She basically devoted her life to helping troubled merfolk. If they were willing to pay the price, she'd help them change their appearance, find love, whatever! They say she was so good, there was no wish she couldn't grant. They also say the price was a tad steep, though. But she was granting wishes! Of course it was!"

'This tale is pretty upfront, there's risks involved in getting what you want and how you're willing to get it. Although she may emotionally manipulate or play off of or and threaten the signers, some businesses are like that and are known for that and still sought after.'

"That's the Sorcerer of the Sands. He was an advisor to a total dolt of a sultan. He was a smart guy. Really capable sort. He exposed this swindler once - some guy pretending to be a prince in order to trick the princess! After that, he got this magic lamp and became the greatest sorcerer in the world. Then, they say... he used that power to become sultan himself!"

'I feel like I could say this about all of the historic tales heard thus far, but we're missing some pieces of the story. Some big details I fear.'

"She's a queen who was said to be the fairest in all the land. In fact, she used her magic mirror to check how she ranked on a daily basis! When it looked like her position was threatened, they say she'd do whatever it took to keep it. Can you even imagine the level of dedication it would require to keep a record like that? Also, they say she was a master of making poisons!"

"Geez. She's pretty, but that sounds kinda scary." Grim shivered.

"You think so? I gotta respect the hustle!" Ace praised.

"Same. She'd make a killing on 'The Real House Wives' or as a mogul."

Ace just gave me a bewildered look at that.

"On my planet, this is hilarious."

"Here is the King of the underworld! Single-handedly ruling a kingdom packed with rambunctious spirits - that takes competence! He may look scary, but he was a straight shooter who worked tirelessly at a tough job he never even asked for. I mean, this is the guy who was ordering Cerberus, the Hydra, and the Titans into battle for him."

"Hmm. That IS something. T'think he could have that much power and not let it go to his head! And that last one there, with the horns?" Grim pointed.

"That's the Thorn Fairy who lived on a mythical mountain. She was noble and elegant, and a master of magic and curses - even by the standards of these seven! She commanded storms, covered the kingdom with thorns... She could use magic on a massive scale! She could even turn herself into a giant dragon."

"Ooh. a dragon! What all monsters yearn to be!" Grim awed with sparkles in his eyes.

"Pretty cool, huh? Not like some piddling weasel." Ace doubled over laughing clutching his stomach.

"Myah?!"

"He got you good there Grim." I conceal my laughter with a cough.

"Pfft... Ah ha ha! I can't hold it back anymore! Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Come on, you're the ones who turned orientation into such a fiasco, right?

The one summoned by the Dark Mirror who can't even use magic, and the monster no on summoned at all. It took everything I had not to burst into laughter right in the middle of the ceremony!" Ace has tears running down his face now.

"H-hey! You don't gotta be a jerk about it!" Grim scowled at Ace, flames flickering.

"Ya, lighten up you Ace-hole."

"So in the end, neither of you got admitted, and now you're janitors? Ah ha ha! SO lame! And you're both so clueless you don't even know who the Great Seven are. Not a one of them! Maybe before you try getting into the academy again, you ought to take a second crack at kindergarten? Ah ha ha ha ha!"

Grim let out a low growl, shifting to an attack position.

"Get his ass Grim."

"Myuh-uh! You ain't walkin' away from me! It's too late for that! Myaaaaah!"

Grim let out a series of flames, but I forgot Ace's preferred magic was wind and he's blowing the fireballs in random directions and causing damage to the school!

It's too late for anyone to separate them now, too absorbed in their own fight. Their ruckus draws in a large crowd of students, uh oh.

"Oh no! Now the Queen of Hearts's statue looks like it's been flame-broiled!" Ace yelled in a panic.

"That's literally your fault for trying to divert the flames carelessly! You should of took your burning like a man!" I gotta defend Grimmy somewhat.

"You stay out of this magicless dweeb!"

A hush fell over the area, all onlookers suddenly grew less rowdy. With a motion the dust settles and in enters the Headmaster looking very displeased.

"What is the meaning of this!? Cease this at once!" Headmaster Crowley took out his magic infused whip and lashed Grim and Ace to settle them down.

'Thank heaven's Crowley didn't hear my comment or else I fear I would have received, as Grim eloquently put it, 'a lashing of love.' Or maybe I would have been spared given that I have no magic. Perks of being a magicless alien.'

"Did I not just warn you, "no more incidents"? And now you've charred one of my statues?! It's almost as though you WANT to be expelled!" The Headmaster told Ace.

As Ace begged for forgiveness, Headmaster Crowley turned to me next and gave me a stern talking as well.

"And you Thorn, you were specifically told to keep Grim under control!"

"I have no excuses, Headmaster."

"Listen well, you three. As punishment for today's infractions, you are hereby ordered to wash a hundred windows!"

As Grim and Ace complained in shock that their actions had consequences, a hundred windows doesn't sound too strenuous all things considered, and assuming I'm the only janitorial team for a specific area it was probably on the to do list anyways.

"You will all meet in the cafeteria after classes are over, do you understand?"

"Ugh. I can't catch a break." Grim muttered.

"Grim, I cannot stress this enough, that is my line."

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Sitting in an empty cafeteria with Grim, save for the lunch staff, was jarring as we waited for Ace to show up.

"I'm already exhausted from a full day of cleanin'. I can't believe we still gotta wash a hundred windows!" Grim placed his head on the cafeteria table with a sign.

"Grim what if the next time someone said something you didn't like you just IGNORED IT and not take it personally?"

Ignoring my advice, Grim lamented some more, "What's buggin' me is, Ace ain't even here yet! To make us wait, after what he did... Grrr! He's so late I bet he bailed on us!"

"It's 'Ass Crappola' he would. At this point I don't care if we have to drag him kicking and screaming, he is not getting out of this."

Grim chuckles at the nickname as we stand from our seats, "Ain't no way am I doin' his punishment for him! Let's hunt that guy down Thorn!"

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Wandering through the school's semi empty hallways, Grim and I turn into the first open door we see.

"Ace! You can't hide from me! Get out here!

...

Maybe the classroom really is empty?" Grim surveyed the area.

Before we left a voice spoke up.

"Oh, I wouldn't say that. I'm here."

"Bwaaaah! That painting just talked!' All the fur on Grim stood up. I was startled as well, the sight of a talking painting is a bit eerie.

"Yes, and...? Is a talking painting really such an oddity at this school? The lady in the portrait on that wall talks too. As does the gentleman in the portrait on this one. As long as a painting has a mouth, why wouldn't it be able to talk? Is that really so strange?'

Ariana over here makes a compelling case, which means one of these paintings must have seen or heard Ace and knows where he went.

"Could you help us? We're looking for a red-haired student with a heart mark over his right eye, his name is Ace Trappola." I mime the heart over my eye.

"Ah, I know the one. A new student, I believe? Today was his first day at school. I think he went back to his dorm a while ago."

"Myaaah! So it's true! He's tryin' to ditch us! Do you know which way he went?"

"The door to the dorms is in the eastern building.'

Thanking the painting Grim and I rush out to the eastern building.

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Finding the 'door' to the dorms was simple enough. Gothic archways framed seven gigantic full body mirrors, Ace was making his way to the first mirror.

'So it would appear that certain mirrors here function as a 'portal.' The campus is already so large, and the dormitories must have sizable amounts of facilities and land in their own right.'

"Yeah right, like I'm gonna wash a hundred windows. I'm just gonna go back and—"

"AHA! GOTCHA, PUNK!" Grim launched himself to stop Ace from crossing over.

It became a game of 'cat and mouse' as Grim and I chased after Ace trying to keep him from crossing over through the mirror back to the Heartslabyul dorm. Ace was too slippery and tricky, he out maneuvered us, but he was blocked by someone exiting the portal.

"...Hm?" The new boy looked up.

"Outta my way!" Ace grabbed him by the shoulders and tried to physically move him.

"Hey?! What gives?!" The spade left eye covered boy stood his ground and refused to give in to Ace.

"Please don't let him pass! He's weaseling out on his responsibilities!" I cry out.

"What? That's not right! But how do I stop him?" The blue haired boy began to mutter about ropes and ice, causing Grim and I to become frazzled.

"I don't care how! Just do something! Anything!" Grim yelled while pulling on Ace's blazer.

"Anything?! Anything, huh... All right! Here goes anything!" Taking out his fountain pen wand he chanted "I summon thee... something heavy!"

The biggest iron cauldron I have ever seen materialized above Ace's head and came crashing down, flattening him to the floor.

"Waaah?! A pot?!" Ace squirmed beneath its weight.

"Ah ha ha ha ha! Look, Thorn, look! That Ace guy got crushed beneath a giant cauldron! It squashed him flat! Aha ha ha! That's what you get!" Grim pointed in mockery.

"Hehehe, he reminds me of a roach like this."

Grim and I lost it at my remark and had to hold onto one another in laughter.

"A cauldron?! I wasn't expecting that. I may have overdone it this time..." He looked off in his thoughts.

"Owwww! What are you bothering me for? You guys coulda just banged out the work yourself!" Ace complained, wriggling his way out from under the pot.

"Be for real right now, Ass. There's no 'banging out' one hundred windows on our own!" Crossing my arms I watch as Ace stands up.

"It's pronounced Ace!" He huffed in annoyance.

"Is there a difference?" I smirked. Before Ace could fire back he was interrupted by the second boy.

"You have to wash a hundred windows as punishment? What the heck did you do?!"

"I was just screwing with that furball a little. ...Okay, and the statue of the Queen of Hearts got a teeny bit charred. Sue me."

"You damaged a statue of the Great Seven?! No wonder he flew off the handle at you! After you managed to get into THIS school, how could you get in trouble on the very first day?!" He looked personally offended.

"Oh shut up. Who are you anyways?"

'Holy shit Ace you roasted him.'

"My name is Deuce. Deuce Spade. Don't you remember your own classmate? Uh..."

"You don't remember my name either, do you?"

'Oh good lord. They're tweedle dumb and tweedle dumber.'

"That's not the point! You shouldn't try to ditch an order from the headmage!' Deuce yelled.

"Yeah, yeah, message received... Fine, let's bang out the windows already. Huh...?" Ace turned in my direction and stared at me wide eyed.

"...? What's wrong Ace?" I started looking around, wait a minute.

"The furball! He's gone!" Ace pointed out.

"Ah ha ha ha! I'll let you two handle the rest! See ya, suckers!" Grim winked while he began his great escape.

"You caught me so YOU could run away yourself?!" Ace yelled exasperated.

'I can't tell if I should be mad that Grim ditched me or happy that at least he made sure I wouldn't do all the work alone...Nah I'm mad.'

"GRIM! Get back here and help you little shi-" Ace covered my mouth as Grim exited the room.

"Hey, uh, Juice?"

"My name isn't "Juice". It's Deuce! With a D!" Not Juice said with a stern expression.

"This is partially your responsibility, you know! So help me catch that little furball!"

"How is this my responsibility?!"

"Grim's useless janitor friend can't use magic. That means this is up to you and me!"

'Just for that snide comment!' I licked Ace's hand causing him to let out an odd noise and furiously wipe his hand on his pants.

There wasn't a moment to lose if we ever wanted to catch Grim. Deuce and Ace took off out of the door room and out into the campus. I followed behind.

Following the trio through the streets of NRC, Grim turned and went inside the cafeteria. Of course he did. But his chaotic energy didn't stop there, it got stronger. Bobbing and weaving and flying in the enclosed space.

"Argh! Stop jumping around like that!" Ace ran his hands through his hair.

"Heh heh heh! Catch me if you can!" Grim waved from the top of the chandelier.

"No fair climbing up onto the chandelier, you coward! I haven't really learned flight magic yet... What could I summon to hold onto him...? Hmmm..." Deuce looked down to his pen, up to Grim, and then at Ace. "Oh! That's it!"

"Did you come up with somethi- Oh, hey! Stop! What are you doing?! Why are you pointing your pen at me?!" Ace tried backing away but bumped into a chair.

"Because I'm going to launch you.' Deuce said this like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Deuce are you nuts?! I know it's Ace, but we can't just throw people!"

"Are you kidding me?! Bwaaah! Put me down! Seriously, do not launch me! Abort! ABORT!" Distracted by my comment, Deuce was able to apprehend Ace and was currently holding him over his head!

"Just make sure to grab him tight.I've got him in my sights, and... Go!" Deuce chucked Ace into the air and used his magic wand to propel him higher into the chandelier.

"BWAAAAAAAH!"

"MYAAAAAAAAH?!"

"AHHHHHH?!"

The only one who wasn't screaming was Deuce, not realizing that he would hit his mark alright... Just a little too well.

The chandelier and all its inhabitants came flying down in an explosion of crystal, candles, iron, and powder.

"*Cough* *Cough* *Hack* I cannot BELIEVE you just did that?!" Ace wheezed sitting up.

"Myaaa..." Grim's eyes were spinning so fast he laid down in the debris.

"Deuce?! Did you wake up today and chug a bunch of clown juice?! What did you think was going to happen?!" I'm at a loss for words, truly.

"Oh, right! I probably should have come up with a way to soften your landing after you caught him..." Deuce said with his left palm upright and his right fist landing on top like a makeshift gavel.

"You complete and total moron! We got Grim, but we broke the chandelier! If the headmage finds out about this-"

"If I find out about... what, dear Ace?" Headmaster Crowley suddenly appeared behind Deuce and I! Scary! I didn't even hear him walk in!

"Ah! Headmage Crowley...!"

I frantically make an 'x' with my arms and shake my head 'no' at Ace.

'Stop! Don't speak you fool!' I mouth at Ace, and surprisingly he does.

"YOU THREE AGAIN! What have you done this time?!" Headmaster Crowley crossed his arms.

"Burning a statue wasn't enough for you? Now you've destroyed a chandelier?! Enough. All of you are expelled."

"WHAAAAAT?!!!" Deuce and Ace balked.

'Wait three of us? But only Deuce and Ace attend school here, he can't be referring to me right? Grim I get, but Grim and I are two separate things, shouldn't it be the 'four' of us? Can you get 'expelled' from school as a non student?'

"Headmage, please! Give me a second chance! I can't get expelled from this school! I need to be here!" Deuce begged.

"Then blame yourself for your own foolish behavior." The Headmaster scowled.

"I'll pay for the damages! However much it costs!" Deuce continued.

"That chandelier is no mere light fixture. It is a magical chandelier. Its candles are powered by a magical energy source, enchanted so that they will burn for eternity. It was created for us by a legendary artificer. Possibly their finest creation. It has been here since the school was established, and I imagined it would be here forevermore. Considering its historical value, I would estimate its worth to be no less than a billion thaumarks. And you intend to repay that sum?' Headmaster Crowley questioned.

'I'm definitely included in the three. If I'm kicked out how will I find a way back? Defect to RSA?? I don't even know where that is! AH!'

Ace and Deuce continued to bargain but I was too caught up in my own problems to listen anymore.

"Even magic has its limits. Furthermore, its magestone - the figurative heart of any magical artifact - is cracked. A magestone cannot easily be replaced. I fear the candles of this majestic chandelier will never burn again... Ah...! But there may be on way. One tiny sliver of chance to repair this chandelier."

"There is?!" The three of us asked in unison. Grimmy was still out for the count.

"The magestone that powered this chandelier was mined from the Dwarfs' Mine. If you can acquire a magestone with the same properties, it may be possible to repair it." Headmaster Crowley mused.

"I will do anything to avoid expulsion, sir!" Deuce saluted.

"Hmmm... Very well, then. I will suspend your expulsion for a single night. But if you fail to return with a magestone by morning, then all of you are expelled. You should be able to reach the Dwarfs' Mine instantly by using one of the gates in the Mirror Chamber."

"Yes sir! Thank you for the opportunity!" Deuce said before bolting for the mirror chamber.

I picked up an unconscious Grim and booked it with the others. My jostling must have woke Grim up.

"Mrnya?! Where am I?" Grim looked around wildly.

"Grimmy, long story short: we're going to mine a magestone to avoid expulsion, and we only have a few hours."

Entering the mirror chamber I'm met with a familiar sight; it's the orientation room! I'm sure there are more ways to leave NRC other than asking the Dark Mirror, I'm just surprised to see it doing such mundane tasks is all.

Stopping in front of the Dark Mirror Deuce asked the Dark Mirror to take us to the Dwarfs' Mine, and the mirror did!

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Chapter Text

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The Dark Mirror deposited us in a dark and freakishly quiet forest, named 'Silent Forest', how appropriate. There were limited light sources, but in front of us was a small cottage that could give ramshackle dorm a run for its money.

"So this is the Dwarfs' Mine... Long ago, this mine was flush with magestones." Deuce looked around curiously.

"Urgh... Who knows what lurks in there now?" Grim rubbed his arms.

"Look, I can see a house. Let's see what the people there have to say." Ace started running towards the cottage.

Without even considering knocking, Ace opened the door. The interior was weathered and musty, a thick layer of dust and cobwebs remained undisturbed. This place had long since been abandoned. We all couldn't help stepping inside, Deuce called out.

"Helloooo? Anyone home? ... It must be empty, this place looks abandoned."

"Oh, you're very observant. A regular David Attenborough." I couldn't help but tease Deuce, gaining me a look of confusion on his part.

"Bwah! I got a spider web on my face! Ptchoo! Ptchoo!" Grim furiously rubbed his paws all over his face.

"Look how tiny these desks and chairs are. Did children live here? One, two... Seven! It's like a clown car in here." Ace laughed.

"Ace, use your brain, why do you think the mine is called 'Dwarfs' Mine?'" I rolled my eyes.

Ace mocked my words ready to escalate things but Deuce took this opportunity to step in between us and shift our focus.

"When the mine was flourishing, this house must have been a lively place."

"Well, this isn't getting us anywhere. If we're gonna find a magestone, it'll be inside the mine. Let's head inside and take a look." Ace said with a turn.

Leaving the quaint home, we followed an old dirt path, the majority reclaimed by nature, until we happened upon the entrance of a stone moss cave: Dwarfs' Mine.

Grim blanched at the sight, "You wanna go inside THERE? It's pitch black!"

Ace scoffed, "What, are you scared of the dark? Pathetic."

"Myah?! I'm not scared of anything! I'm taking the lead. You all follow me!" Grim zoomed inside.

The mine was as bright as it was outside: the remaining gems gave a soft glow. Carts and pickaxes were left haphazardly around the entrance, but the tunnels looked like they were still intact. Perhaps the dwarfs left as the mine had run out of whatever item they were mining, or they retired, or picked up a different profession.

The three of us followed behind Grim in row so as to not lose sight of one another.

"Huh? Hold up!" Deuce suddenly stopped causing a chain reaction of Ace and I to bump into one another and Deuce.

"Ugh. What now?" Ace asked, rubbing his nose from where he bumped into Deuce.

"There's something there!" Deuce pointed in ahead.

"Hee hee hee hee! Visitors! The first in ten years!" Ghost A cheered.

"Do make yourselves at home... You can stay forever!" Ghost B lunged for us!

Dodging the multiple ghosts I couldn't help but ask "Why are there so many ghosts wherever we go?"

"If we stop to fight, we'll never get anywhere. Let's just keep moving." Deuce pushed through the barrage of ghosts.

"Sure, but don't act like we voted you team leader. The only reason we're here in the first place is because of that stupid stunt you pulled." Ace argued.

"Oh? I'm pretty sure this all started because you tried to ditch your window-cleaning punishment!" Deuce snapped.

"So, we're bringing up ancient history now? Then if you wanna get down to brass tacks, this all started when that furball torched that statue!" Ace pointed to Grim.

"Myah?! Maybe you shouldn'ta made fun of me, then!" Grim fired back.

"You guys are both at fault for different reasons, GET OVER IT! We need to collect that magestone before morning!" I shout tiredly.

The squabbling died down somewhat, and when their volume decreased I heard something.

'..iiivvv... ...oooouuu...'

"...? Wait, shhh! Did you guys hear that?"

"Huh?" The group settled down and listened, the weird groans persisted, becoming more frequent.

"Wh-where's that comin' from?" Ace stuttered.

'...neeevvvaaa... ...iiivvv... ...ooouuu...'

"Sounds like..... It's getting closer?" Deuce whispered.

"Stooonesss... Stooonesss aaare miiiiine!"

A bubbling black tar mass wearing a red coat, holding an oil lantern and pickaxe came bounding over! Its half full pot of tar for a head sloshed with a long brown cap to keep it sealed.

"AHHHHH! What is that thing?" We all turned and ran away from the ominous creature.

"Myaaaah! No one said there'd be monsters! Let's get out of here!" Grim shrieked.

"That thing is super creepy! But didn't it just say something about 'stones'?" Ace questioned.

"Stooonesss... ...nevvva give stooonesss...!" The monster flung its arms around wildly, causing us to scream and dodge its weapons.

"So there ARE still magestones here!" Deuce yelled.

"We don't know that, it could be talking about any of the stones here!" I shout.

"Myaaah... Even as a master sorcerer, I... I don't think I can take that thing down!" Grim whined.

"But we need a magestone or we'll get expelled! I'm going in!" Deuce pivoted facing the monster.

"Are you outta your mind?!' Ace turned around a bit further ahead than Deuce.

"Deuce! You can't fight that thing alone!" I stop in my tracks.

Deuce makes a show of cracking his knuckles and punching one hand in the other. Determination radiates off of him.

"I won't be expelled! No matter what!" Deuce raised his fountain wand and began firing spells.

The oozing monster was unaffected and never slowed in its speed. Everyone began to run again, Deuce continuously casting spells on the monster.

"Begone! Begone! Begoooooone!" The monster roared with a furry of swinging limbs.

"Bwahhhhh!" Deuce let out as he nearly got swiped by the monster's pickaxe.

"Aw, crap! He's got Loosey-Deucey on the ropes! Not on my watch! Heeyah!" Ace fired some magical attacks of his own.

"Rooooooargghh!" The monster was unphased.

Closer to the exit of the cave, I turned around to make sure everyone was still present. With the light of the moon going through the monster's head I noticed something was sparkling inside the cave. A magic stone?

"Did you guys just see that sparkle behind us?" I yell over my shoulder.

"Behind the monster! There's something sparkling in the mineshaft!" Ace called out.

"Could that have been a magestone?!" Deuce asked.

"GWAAAAAAAH! Nooo giiive yooouuu stooooooone!" The sludge picked up its speed and attacks.

"Thorn, we need to book it, and fast! That thing's gonna pound us into tuna paste!" Grim cried out.

"Right, let's go back to the cottage!" I say.

No one dared to stop running or look back at the roaring monster until the cottage came into view. We were all a panting mess and yet the monster didn't follow us out of the mineshaft.

"This should be far enough, I think?" Grim said between gulps of air.

"Owww... What was that thing? No one said there'd be anything like that!" Ace groaned rubbing his left shoulder.

"That was no normal ghost, that's for sure." Deuce said while wiping his forehead.

"That was a ghost?!" I wheezed out, hands on my knees.

"Let's just give up and go home. I'll happily take the expulsion if it means never having to fight that thing again." Ace said casually.

"What?! Nuh-uh, not happenin'! I'd rather die than get expelled from Night Raven! How can you give up when the stone is right there?" Deuce said, his face turning red from anger.

'Hermione is about to snap!' I thought watching Deuce work himself up.

"Pfft. Big talk from someone who's not even half the mage I am. You want that stone so bad, go get it yourself. I'm out." Ace taunted in typical Ace fashion.

"Oh YEAH?! Fine, go back to your coop, you big chicken!" Hermione casted a burn spell on Ace: it was super effective.

"Whaaaaat?! Who're you callin' chicken, huh?!' Ace was unprepared for that absolute savage roast, he really did look like a big chicken too.

"Whoa, Deuce... Is it just me, or did you, like, turn into a totally different person just now?" Grim analyzed his appearance.

"Yeah, your whole voice and demeanor changed." I added on.

"Huh?! *Cough* *Cough* Sorry... Lost my cool for a second there." Deuce looked down in mortification that his 'other persona' had slipped out.

"I don't know what spells you guys were casting, but can't you try a different approach, like instead of attacks, containing or freezing the monster briefly?" I asked.

"The headmage said it himself... magic has limits. If you can't strongly visualize your magic, it isn't going to happen. Using magic at a greater scale, or using different types of magic - those things require training." Deuce answered.

"Yeah, that's why magic academies exist. It takes a lot of training before you can snap your fingers and turn your thoughts into magic. And the more flustered you are, the more likely you are to make mistakes." Ace (for once) helpfully added on.

"You guys have been very enlightening. I just assumed that everyone here was born with magic so it came intuitively." I said.

"No, not everyone in twst is born with magic, and even those who are it isn't guaranteed that they'll be capable to advance it. But we don't have time to get into all that." Ace replied.

'Hm. Guess I'm just 'some guy' here after all, guess I should stop calling myself an alien... Nah, I'm still from a whole other universe that's very alien of me.' I think to myself.

"Anyway, we need to find some way to defeat that creature and get the magestone." Deuce said arms crossed one hand holding his chin.

"Yeaaaaah. Just like the time with the chandelier, right? You "found some way," and now here we are. We just fought that thing and it creamed us. So what exactly is your plan here, genius? Because I sure don't trust you to improvise!" Ace started getting in Deuce's face (again.)

"What?! You're the one who-" Deuce argued back, but Grim and I ignored their antics.

"Aaaand they're at it again." Grim looked at me with a sigh.

Crossing my arms I started thinking about how to progress after this utter failure.

'Their magic is limited, they can't work together, magic doesn't seem to have any effect on the creature so brute force wouldn't either, we have a few hours max before morning...

...

...

I know just what to say.'

"Let's all make peace with getting expelled."

I just got sucked in this game okay, I'm not a protagonist, I don't have it all figured out. Even though I've played this game in the past, living in this game I've realized that things are not set in stone: plot points will either happen or not and it won't make a difference, the game won't end and life will go on. And I just feel a little lost in all of this.

"Whoa, that was harsh. Where'd that come from?" Grim stepped in front of me to look at me, surprised at my outburst.

It took Deuce and Ace by surprise too if their 'huhs' were anything to go by.

"Well you guys could try to cooperate." I say.

"With Loosey-Deucey? No way. He'd get me killed!"

"Like it'd be some treat for me to work with you?!"

"What we're doing now obviously isn't working, we need a proper plan." I explain.

"A proper plan? Like some kinda buddy move? Is that a joke? You always say the lamest things with the straightest face, Thorn." Ace mocks.

"Agreed. No way could I work together with him." Deuce crosses his arms turning away from Ace.

"Then suffer in silence as you're expelled on the first day. Now that's truly lame." I say with a smirk.

A hush fell over the tense atmosphere, until I broke the silence explaining that I did in fact have a plan.

"Gah... Fine. Let's just get this over with, then. All right, Thorn. What's the plan?" Ace asked, everyone making their way closer to me.

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"Thorn... Is this plan of yours really gonna work? I'm sca- I mean, I'm a little... uh, hungry." Grim cautiously approached the entrance of the Dwarfs' Mine.

"It'll work, Grim. I'm a master strategist."

Setting our plan into motion, Deuce, Ace and I leave Grim at the entrance of the mineshaft and assume our positions.

"H-hey, monster! I'm uh... I-I'm over here!" Grim half-heartedly called out.

Silently, the monster was suddenly at the entrance of the cave, charging out with a 'GRAAAWWRRR! BEGOOOONE!'

"He's comin' our way Thorn!" Grim yelled rushing towards me, the monster throwing attacks left right and center.

"We need to lure him as far away as we can from the mine!"

"GRWWAAAR! BEGONE!" The monster shouted.

"We're counting on you Ace." I give Ace a look of determination as I pass him.

"You bet. I got this! One extra-large gust of wind, comin' up!" Ace whipped out his pen and unleashed his unique magic.

"With a side of Grim's blazin'-hot fire! MYAAAH!" Grim spat his fireballs into Ace's wind tunnel, creating a fire tornado.

"Grrraaahhh?!" The monster stopped, the flames trapping it inside a vortex.

"How's that taste?! With my winds fanning them, even Grim's feeble flames can become an inferno!" Ace boasted.

"Whaddaya mean "feeble"?! Ya really don't know how to shut yer mouth, do ya?" Grim frowned.

'So true Grimmy. We'd have waaaaay less problems if Ace kept his mouth shut.' I thought with a groan.

"Now's our chance! Deuce!" I call out to Deuce.

"Just stay calm, aim carefully... and pull out the biggest, heaviest thing I can think of... Get 'em, cauldron!'

Above the monster a huge cauldron flattened the monster, pinning it to the ground.

"Gwaaah?!' The monster cried out, in pain or confusion, it was too hard to tell.

"Nailed it! The plan's workin'! Look, Thorn! That monster got smashed flat by a falling cauldron, just like Ace did!" Grim chuckled.

"Hehe, looks like how Ace did too; a squirming bug." I laugh with Grim.

"Coulda done without the reminder, thanks! This has been one drag after another." Ace said.

"Quick! While it's distracted, we need to get that magestone!" Deuce called out, already running toward the mine.

"Guh?! Waaait! Nooooooo!" The monster yelled, fighting even harder to break free.

Running past the monster's makeshift timeout, we were able to make it to the end of the mine this time, flying through the ghosts, following the sparkling light, it was growing brighter and more colorful the closer we got until we came upon an iridescent rainbow stone.

"That's it! That's the magestone!" Deuce exclaimed, grabbing the stone.

The monster heard us and let out a "Doooon't toooouch thaaaat!"

Turning around we could see the monster was nearly free from the cauldron!

"Hey, Deuce! You gotta add more weight!" Grim said.

"Y-you mean something heavier? Uh... I summon thee, cauldron! And also, uh... Um... Another cauldron! And a cauldron on top of that! All the cauldrons!" Deuce yelled with a wave of his wand.

Watching the monster seize its movements as more cauldrons appeared and squashed it, I couldn't help but say to Deuce with a shoulder pat, "You're a little confused, but you got the spirit."

"Ngghhh!" The monster struggled under the weight of so many cauldrons.

"Is that the only thing you know how to summon?!" Ace looked at Deuce incredulously.

"Pipe down already! I'm worked up enough as it is!" Deuce shot back.

"Let's just leave with the stone already." I say to the trio.

Dashing past the monster, with Deuce carrying the magestone, the monster found a newfound frenzy and escaped the weight and fire tornado! It was gaining speed faster than we could ever hope to run!

"Are you kidding me?! It's still coming! It pushed off all that weight!" Ace said in disbelief.

"Ooooooh! Giiiiiive itttt baaaack!" It bellowed out.

"It's too fast! It's about to catch us!" Deuce yelled out in alarm.

"In this world it's kill or be killed, let's get it!" I yell to the squad.

"Uggh fine! Let's smash that thing! Try not to wet yourself, Deucy."

"Same to you, Ace!"

"I'm gonna show ya why they call me 'Grim the Great.'"

The trio attacked the monster in tandem, combining their magical prowess and transforming that blob into a pile of defeated goo that was slowly dissipating. Everyone was out of breath, and waited until the items had stopped smoking before celebrating.

"Is it.... Over?" Ace stared at the pile of items.

"I think.. We won? I think we did it!" Grim cheered.

We all let out our own noises of triumph. High fives and chest pumps were given out in celebration.

I couldn't help but say "We're all really good friends, huh."

"Uh... I don't think that had anything to do with it." Deuce said, giving me a look of bewilderment.

"Yeah! Spare us the cliches, Thorn!" Ace said with a light push to my shoulder.

"There's no 'together' here! We won 'cause of me! This is all from me bein' a magical genius!" Grim boasted.

Once that painfully awkward phase on my part, (how hard is it to make friends?!) passed, Ace turned to look at me.

"Y'know... I hate to admit it, but... We mostly won because of your plan Thorn.'

Deuce chimed in, "Yeah...If you hadn't managed to keep your cool and tell us all what to do, we never would have got this magestone. Now I won't get expelled. And wow THAT is a relief."

We were about to start walking back to the mirror portal when I noticed Grim started to sniff the air. Soon he was approaching the disregarded items.

"Using all that magic made me hungry! *sniff sniff* What's this?' Grim pushed away the red coat revealing a black stone.

"Is that a part of the monster we just beat? It looks like a magestone. But it's black as coal! I've never seen one like that before." Deuce announced.

"It smells amazing.' Grim said.

"Are you insane?!" Ace asked.

"Must be some sorta monster candy it was hiding from us!" Grim practically drooled.

"Grim I doubt the monster - OH MY GOD HE"S EATING IT!"

Grim shoved the gem into his mouth, it didn't stay there very long as he let out a "myaah!'

"Are you okay?"

"That's what you get for eating trash."

'Bad kitty! Spit that out!"

But to our collective shock, Grim exclaimed that it was the most delicious thing he had ever eaten! Monsters will eat anything huh?

"Myahaha! That was great! Don't worry about me. I don't got a weak stomach like you humans do." Grim smugly said.

"We'll see if you're so smug later tonight when you get sick." Ace warned.

"We need to get this magestone to the Headmaster, let's pull ourselves together." Deuce interrupted, clutching the magstone.

The sun was in the sky. It was early morning when we crossed through the mirror.

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Chapter Text

Prolouge

Into The Unknown

Part 6

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Exiting the portal, awaiting us in the mirror chamber was Headmaster Crowley. We presented the Headmaster with the magestone.

"Pardon?! You're telling me you actually went to the Dwarfs' Mine in search of a magestone?" Headmaster Crowley squawked in shock.

"Uh, yeah?"

"I didn't expect that you'd seriously do it. And never in my wildest imaginings did I think you would actually return with a magestone! And here I spent all evening preparing your expulsion documents." As Headmaster Crowley said this, he produced a thick stack of documents as proof.

"Are you serious?! While we were fightin' some crazy monster for you, you were expelling us?!" Grim shouted in frustration.

"'Monster?'...?"

"Yeah. There was a monster, all right. A big, nasty one. It nearly killed us!"

"Would you kindly relate this story in full?" The Headmaster asked as he led us to his office.

The Headmaster's office was wide at the top and narrow at the bottom. A plush dark violet carpet stretched from the entrance to an oak desk, decorated by two golden candle labrahs with purple flames. Grand purple curtains draped around the room, floating portraits of the Great Seven of varying shaped golden frames floated above the desk.

Once inside and seated, we all took turns explaining the night we had endured.

"Hmmm. So a mysterious monster was living in the mines. And the four of you worked together to destroy it, and then brought its magestone back to me?" Headmaster Crowley surmised, elbows on his desk while his hands held his chin.

"I don't know that I'd call it "working together." Ace said.

"It was more like we just happened to share the same goal at the same time...' Deuce added.

"You guys are such dirtbags." I mumbled "Yes we all worked together, amazingly I might add. We secured the stone, suffered no injuries, and didn't die."

"Oh, gracious... Ohhh... Ohhhhhhhh! *Sobbing*" Headmaster Crowely slunk his head on his desk.

"What is this guy's deal?! Burstin' into tears in public? At this age?!" Grim used both his paws and gestured to the dramatically loud sobbing Headmaster.

"In all the decades I've worked at this school... The day has finally come when the students of Night Raven College have joined hands together to defeat a common foe!"

'Wait... So before this, in this villain school, no one ever worked together? But how though? I'm sure they have friends? Maybe he means when these villains go off to do villain things they're usually solo? Why is this a good thing for Crowley?'

"Whoa! No! No way would I join hands with that guy!" Deuce gestured to Ace.

"Okay, one, there was no joining of hands. Gross. And two, exactly HOW old are you, headmage?" Ace shouted.

Ace and Deuce doth protest the hand holding allegations a bit too strongly methinks. Headmaster Crowley skillfully ignored their yapping and continued.

"At this moment, I am moved beyond words. This incident has proven my hopes were justified. Thorn Silvanus, my doubts are allayed! For you... You possess the talents of a beastmaster!"

"A beastmaster? Men and beasts aren't so similar... But they're not so dissimilar either." I say, looking off into thought.

"Excuse me?!"

"Excuse you?!"

"My students have all been selected by the Dark Mirror for their exceptional talent and potential. But great talent begets great pride and big egos. Most are so self-reliant and self-centered that they never even consider cooperating with others."

"You make it sound like that's a bad thing." Grim piped up.

"But you, Silvanus, possess no magic. Yet in spite of that - or perhaps because of it - you were able to convince those who CAN use magic to work together for a common goal. The everyday, humdrum mundanity you possess may be exactly what Night Raven College needs!"

"But... none of those words are good things?" Ace spoke up.

"Silvanus... I am convinced that people like you are necessary for the future of this school. My educator's intuition tells me so. Trappola, Spade - I hereby revoke your pending expulsions! Furthermore, Silvanus... I am granting you the qualifications necessary to attend at Night Raven College!

"WHAT?!" The trio almost flew out of their seats at the news.

I stared wide-eyed at Headmaster Crowley in shock. I'm in? I did it?! Finding a way home has just gotten a little bit easier!

"You really want me as a student here, Headmaster?"

"Of course. This is extraordinarily kind of me. However, there is one condition.

Your inability to use magic is, for a mage, unacceptable. You would not be able to adequately pursue the school's curriculum! As for you, Grim... Your actions today have made it clear that you possess sufficient talent to become a mage. In light of the total sum of your respective circumstances, you and Silvanus will share a single enrollment at Night Raven College."

"Myah! I... I'll get to go to this school...? As an actual student? Not a janitor?!" Grim asked, crawling onto my lap, I held him close so he won't fall.

"Correct. However! There must be no further incidents like the one that occurred today. Are we clear?" The Headmaster said sternly, furrowing his brows. (At least I assume they would be behind the mask.)

Grim turned to look at me, amazement written all over his face "Myah... Myah... Thorn, I... I finally..."

I take one of his paws in my hand and give it a shake. "It'll be a pleasure working with you Grimmy." Adding a wink.

"MYAAAAAH! I FINALLY DID IT!" Grim sang, almost jumping on the Headmaster's desk.

"Accordingly, I will now present to Grim the magestone that is issued to every student here." Headmaster Crowley said while rummaging through his top drawer.

"Heh! A magestone, eh?!" Grim said.

Everyone looked at the smaller sized magstone. It was refined, violet, and attached to a black and white striped ribbon.

"It is typically attached to the "magic pen" that each student uses. But I suspect your paws cannot handle implements. Therefore, I have a custom solution for you. Is it possible that I am, in fact, too kind?" As the Headmaster finished, he fastened the ribbon around Grim, tying it in a neat bow in the back.

"Ah, sweet! I look awesome! A magestone collar, to be worn only by the legendary archmage, Grim!" Grim was lost in his own world admiring his new magstone collar.

"You're not listening to anything I say, are you? Silvanus. As you can plainly see, Grim remains oblivious to the customs of human society. You are to keep a tight rein on Grim, and ensure there are no further incidents!"

I nod my head to the Headmaster, laughing softly at Grim's fashion show and ramblings.

"Wow, that's quite the promotion. From janitor to student to prefect, all in the span of a day." Ace congratulated me.

"Oh, I see. So if your dorm is just you two... And the headmage himself is putting you in charge of Grim, that makes you... the dorm prefect." Deuce remarked.

'I'd be a prefect and the vice housewarden too, I don't think Grim would really mind though.' I surmised in my head.

"Well, that's gotta be a Night Raven first! A magic-less prefect? But sure, why not? Whatever works!" Ace teased me.

I really didn't know or care if Ace was making fun of me, I was just so happy that things were improving for me so soon.

"Ah, Yes. I suppose that does make you a prefect. I just so happen to have a job for you, and that title will make it all the easier to foist... er, I mean, congratulations! Now, I have something for you. This is called a ghost camera."

Headmaster Crowley handed me a very old fashion looking beige and brown camera with a golden lens that resembled a mouse's silhouette.

"It's a camera enchanted with a special kind of magic. It enables the user to photograph not just the subject's physical form, but parts of their soul itself."

"Wait... That sound's sketchy." Deuce said.

"I have to agree with Deuce, huh?" I said.

"They're called Memories. Here's the thing: when the soulbond between photographer and subject deepens... The Memories captured in this magic camera's photos come jumping out!" Headmaster Crowley explained.

I still felt very lost in what a ghost camera entails. And if this is 'old' technology, then how advanced are the current cameras! I ask the Headmaster to elaborate.

"When the photographer and subject grow closer, their photographs grow animated like videos... And sometimes the photographs take on corporeal form and slip out. Is that not what you youths would call "wicked keen"?

Even I had to ask, "Headmaster Crowley, how old are you, for real?"

Deuce excitedly butted in "That sounds like ghost photography!"

"Very astute. Hence the name "ghost camera". I understand it was developed as a more vivid way to capture moments in time, in an age before video. As Spade observed, in days of yore, when people saw Memories jumping out of photos, they would get spooked and yell, "Ghost!" I've heard many a tale of people who were deathly scared of being photographed by such cameras."

"This tech sounds like way more trouble than it's worth."

"I have to agree with Ace." I really do not like the sound of this 'ghost camera.'

"Silvanus. I would like you to photograph Grim and the other students with this camera, and make a record of your campus life." The Headmaster placed the camera in my hands.

"Ahem... Make especially certain to capture the mischief caused by certain students who struggle with impulse control. Keeping a photographic journal sounds far less tedious than writing me lengthy reports, wouldn't you agree?

As a prefect, consider it your duty to maintain a sharp eye on your surroundings and record them. Note how generous I'm being in providing a rare magical item that even someone like yourself can use. Is my kindness not beyond all reckoning?"

'Honestly I think it would be pretty hard to take photos of anyone after hearing a description like that. I guess the old bird is looking for praise, might as well.'

"Thank you Headmaster Crowley."

"The hour has grown late, so further details shall have to wait till the morrow. You are all dismissed. Return to your dorms."

Looking out the window, Headmaster Crowley was correct, we had spent the whole day going over the case of the magestone monster, school promotions, and ghost photography explanations.

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Walking out onto the dark balcony of the second floor, we made our way to the mirror chamber to return back to our dorms.

"Phew... We managed to avoid expulsion. That was a close one!" Deuce sagged in relief.

"Yeah, no kidding!" Ace exclaimed.

"La la la la la! I'm a student at Night Raven College! La la la! I'm gonna be the top mage on campus in no time. Enjoy eating my dust, boys" Grim mocked.

"Big words for a sentient pile of lint who's literally only half a student. Still... Good for you." Ace said to Grim and I.

"I guess we're schoolmates now. Grim, Thorn — welcome to Night Raven." Deuce said with a smile.

As a joke I took Deuce and Ace's hand, criss crossed them and shook them and said with a grin "Hello fellow Night Raven schoolmates."

Ace removed his hand, while I let go of Deuce's.

"Okay, seriously, can we quit it with that stuff?" Ace huffed.

"Heh. We'll be seeing each other all the time now. We'll see what a pleasure that turns out to be. Especially you, Ace, since we're in the same dorm." Deuce teased.

"Yeaaah, can't say I'm jazzed to see your smug, self-important scowl."

"Better than your lazy, dopey grin."

This was our stop: the mirror chamber.

"Keep bawling, crybaby. I haven't forgotten how you almost wept when he said you were expelled. Catch ya later, Thorn."

"See ya tomorrow!" I called out as they passed through the mirror.

"Man, those two are made for each other. Maybe they're the type who bond through squabbling? Anyway, Thorn, let's get back to the dorm!"

"I think you're right, Grim. Those two are going to be good friends."

"Tomorrow when we wake, it won't be as janitors. Finally, finally... My glorious education as a proper Night Raven College student is about to begin!"

Grim and I walked out of the mirror chamber and back to our dorm.

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Chapter Text

Book 1: A Study in Scarlet Tyrants

In A World of My Own

Part 1

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When Grim and I returned, a two toned purple box was waiting on our bed, a white card signed by the Headmaster was attached. Opening the box, a Night Raven College uniform was inside. A black blazer with gold trim, a gray vest, a white dress shirt, black slacks with a gold line running on the outer legs, a black and white striped tie, and a black and white arm band with a violet gem in the center - similar to Grim’s magestone.

‘Finally I can wash this ceremonial robe; I’ve been living in it far too long. I might as well wash the bedding while I’m at it. Which means I’ll have to wake up super early to find a river… Ugh what a pain.’

Making my way to the bed, where a curled up Grim was already fast asleep, I flop down and shut my eyes exhausted. Thinking of all the things I would try to accomplish tomorrow.

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‘Chirp, chiiiiirp. Tweet!’

Turning my head to the window the sky held a faint purple hue. The sun had yet to rise but the songbirds were already so lively. Watching Grim sort himself underneath his pillow to block out the noise I figured I’d have enough time to wash and set the clothes out to dry before he woke up. Or anyone for that matter.
I set Grim on the adjacent chair and make my way outside.

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Carrying my load I follow the high white brick wall that surrounds the school.

‘From what I saw briefly from the map Crowley used, this place is like an island where Night Raven College is located in the northern end, with a village of sorts in the center, and Royal Sword Academy (rsa) resides in the southern end. I should check out the library today and start gathering my own personal study materials. And if I cannot find a river, maybe I could pester Ace or Deuce about washing my things.’

Thankfully there was a break in the brick wall, an old iron gate leading to a dark forest. Following the light dirt path, where low hanging branches clutter the trail in an attempt to pull me back, the uneven terrain soon disappears; reclaimed by the earth, eventually leading to a river, perfect!

I get down on my knees by the riverbed and start washing the dirt off my robe and bedding, which proves to be difficult without soap. This probably beats the alternative of just beating the dust off. Listening to the birds sing I decided to quietly sing a song of my own while I work.

“Where the North wind meets the sea, there's a river full of memory. Sleep, my darling, safe and sound, for in this river, all is found.”

My singing has seemed to have attracted a few birds, they move downwards on the low hanging branches and sing a tune of their own, I carry on setting my robe on the closest branch beside me.

“In her waters, deep and true, lie the answers and a path for you, dive down deep into her sound. But not too far or you'll be drowned.”

I stop singing when I hear shifting behind me. Something I cannot see flutters the leaves in a tree, turning around a doe is at my back! What in the accidental Disney princess? Startled by the animal I forget all about the tree. The deer doesn’t do much, just backs away a little. I guess since I have an audience I may as well finish the song.

“Yes, she will sing to those who'll hear. And in her song, all magic flows. But can you brave what you most fear? Can you face what the river knows?”

Fishing my blanket out of the river, I stand and fold it with my robe finishing the song.

“Where the North wind meets the sea, there's a mother full of memory. Come, my darling, homeward bound. When all is lost, then all is found.”

Suddenly the animals begin to congregate by the shrubbery adjacent to the river stream. What or who has entered the forest?

“Hehehe. Please stop my forest friends. Shhh! That tickles hehe!”

Approaching the giggling bush, my eyes lock with gentle brown ones framed in soft black locs with a black red accented beret atop his head; Neige LeBlanche.

We stare at one another wide eyed and flustered until we both break the silence.

“Please don’t tell anyone I was washing my clothes here.”

“I didn’t mean to spy on you! I just lost my way in the forest.”

Neige rises from his hiding spot waving his hands in front of himself in defense.

“I was looking for some plants someone from the village had asked me to help them retrieve and I overheard your lovely singing and felt myself drawn to you.”

I had to blush in embarrassment at that. He heard me sing? Animals are one thing but people are another! Ahh!

“I recognize your uniform, you attend Night Raven Collage, why not use your dormitories facilities to wash your laundry?”

“Hahaha, I haven’t any facilities to speak of. I’m a freshman and prefect of ‘ramshackle’ dorm. My name is Thorn Silvanus, what’s your name?”

Neige was quiet for a moment.

“You don’t know my name?” He asked curiously.

“No? I’m not from around here, and judging by your white blazer with blue and gold accents and your red and gold broach you must attend RSA right?”

“Oh! Yes! I’m a second year student at Royal Sword Academy. My name is Neige LeBlanche, it's a pleasure to meet you Thorn. You’re very accomplished; a first year and already a prefect.”

“Thank you and likewise Neige.” I say as we shake hands.

“Do you think you could help me get back to RSA?” Neige sheepishly asked.

“Uh.. In theory if you just turn around you should be able to find your way back to the village again… Or maybe if you explain what happened to the Headmadge at NRC maybe he’ll have a door that leads to the village or RSA?”

Neige looks at me hesitantly, until a wide grin breaks out on his face.

“That’s a wonderful idea Thorn. I’ll go back with you to NRC! Will your laundry not soak your clothes?’ He asks while walking alongside me.

“It’s alright, it’s only water I’ll dry off eventually.”

Neige seemed unsatisfied with that answer and with a quick movement of his hand my laundry was dry.

“Consider it a thank you for helping me get back to RSA and an apology for intruding on your singing.”

“Don’t worry about it Neige, I was a little embarrassed at first, but I’ll get over it, haha.”

We continued walking in comfortable silence as the sun rose higher, dying the sky blue.

Exiting the forest back through the iron gates I continue chatting with Neige.

“Thank you for the help, it made traveling and the rest of my day so much easier. Do you want to be friends with me?” Neige asked with a sparkle in his eye.

“Sure Neige, I’d like to be your friend.” (Finally! 1 friendship confirmed!)

“Should we exchange contact info to keep in touch?” Neige asked, taking his smartphone out of his pocket.

“I currently don’t own a phone or any social media, but I’m working on it. If you write down your info I’ll contact you as soon as I can.”

“Okay!” Neige says with a smile as he writes out his information on his notepad.

Leading Neige to the Headmaster’s office I wave goodbye and make my way back to the ramshackle dorm to put away my belongings, and prepare for my first day of school at NRC.

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Grim and I enter our first class of the day: Introduction to Potionology with Professor Divus Crewel.

Reading my slip of paper, this semester I have Potionology, History of Magic, P.E, lunch, Magic Analysis, and Alchemy. And my homeroom is with professor Crewel.

‘Hm. First years don’t really use magic right away it seems.’

The classroom resembles more of a lecture hall with how the mahogany study desks are layed out. The walls are lined with high shelves filled to the brim with beakers, vials, various exotic bottles filled with an assortment of liquids, and other smaller organization boxes. A huge black cauldron was placed in the middle of the room with Professor Crewel’s long desk not far behind with a huge blackboard covering the majority of the wall.

“Fwnnya! This place looks like an evil scientist’s lab!” Grim exclaimed, examining the room’s atmosphere.

Walking with Grim towards the closest available desk, I joke with Grim,
“Maybe he’ll wear a cosmic robe and pointed hat.”

We take our seats in the second front row. An npc from Octavinelle with shaggy turquoise hair and deep brown eyes sat beside us. At least that’s where I assume he’s from judging from his dorm uniform. Black suit paired with a purple dress shirt, bowtie and scarf, and a black fedora with a purple ribbon accent.

Once the class is practically filled, the professor walks in monochromatic fashion. His hair is divided with the right side being a bit longer and white while the left side being black and shorter. His large white and black striped fur coat lined in red almost conceals his suit underneath: a red tie with a vest split by the right side black and the left side white, and his red leather gloves hold a steely whip complete with a chain attached with a red dog collar at the end.

With a crack of his whip he commences class.

‘SNAP!’

“Listen up you unruly mutts! I am Professor Crewel, head of the science department of Night Raven College. Under my guidance you will all become show winning dogs worth your pedigree. Today I will be going over basic knowledge of potions and potion making, make sure to take notes.”

Another crack of his whip had some students scrambling for their notebooks.

“Fwnya! I don’t want to get another lash of love! Hand me that pencil henchmen!” Grim not so quietly whispers.

I say nothing and hand him the pencil. I’m more interested to see how Grim will be able to write, how is he even going to hold a pencil? Silly kitty.

“...There are a few potions however that their creation, distribution, trading, or purchase are a punishable offense. These illegal potions include love elixirs, revival from death potions, gold transformation serum, and transformation potions.”

Professor Crewel had said something that stumped me. ‘Transformation potions are illegal? But Crowley used one to turn into a ghost right in front of me and Grim!’

I raise my hand, I need answers. I won’t out that shady bird but it seems the Headmaster is taking advantage of my ignorance of this world. Which is fine, I’ll play along, but I won’t be conned.

Professor Crewel turns away from the blackboard and addresses me, “Yes, pup?”

“At what point is a transformation potion considered to be illegal? And are certain parties exempt from this rule? Such as someone’s unique magic or a professor consuming one for education purposes?”

Some students chuckle at my questions, nonetheless, professor Crewel clarifies.

“A full transformation potion, one that changes a person’s identity, whereas they are no longer recognizable, impersonating, or have changed more than 60% of their biological form, or even into a different form is considered illegal. No one is exempt from the law, however, there are varying types of transformation potions that are legal such as the one’s merfolk would take to have access to land. And In the case of someone’s unique magic, common sense will tell you that that is a part of the individual’s biology.”

In response to my silence, professor Crewel carries on with his lesson. The Octavinelle npc beside me speaks up.

“Ayo, what ocean rock did you use to live under seastar?” He asks between laughs.

“Your mother.”

He laughs more at my response as I ignore him and continue writing notes and musing on Crowley’s morality for the rest of the lesson.

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Grim and I head to our next class, History of Magic with Professor Mozus Trien.

“Hey Grim, do you think we’ll have any classes with Ace and Deuce?”

“There’s like 200 students ya’ know? They’ll be hard to spot.”

Walking into the classroom, the layout is slightly different from professor Crewel’s. Rather than the large wooden desks gradually going up in rows in the center of the room, they are divided by either side of the room in two rows. There are way more windows and a cozier atmosphere, similar to a library. Speaking of, there are a magnitude of bookcases and books tethering on professor Trein’s desk, with of course the ever so faithful blackboard on the wall.

“Oh, there's a little black and white cat on a plush stool.” I can’t help but to say out loud.

“That’s Lucius. And he’s a cat straight from Hell, stay away from him if you value your life.” Ace says with a flick to my forehead.

“Ace! Deuce! Let’s sit together, do you think we share any more classes?”

“Thorn, we’re first years in group 1-A, we’re going to share the same classes. You were so entertaining this morning, pfff. Only you would ask the most basic common-sense questions.” Ace mocked.

“Lay off Ace.” Deuce gave Ace a light shove.

“Ya Ass, or I’ll make you sit beside Grim.”

We all turned to Grim at that moment, Grim gave a wide smile that didn’t reach his wide expressionless eyes. Very sinister! Why did he do that? We all got a chill from the sight.

When we sat down, Professor Trein wasted no time in instructing us to collect and open our ‘History of Magic in relation to Geography and Culture’ textbook and to read the first five chapters.

While we read and took notes, he held a stern gaze as he scanned the room and held and petted Lucius.

Two first year boys from Savanaclaw were being too rowdy behind Grim, Ace, Deuce and I, causing Trein to rise from his seat and grab them by their necks pushing them down slightly yet firmly.

Walking his way back to his desk he announced, “detention here after school. You will write a 300 word essay on the importance of paying attention.”

The white and red haired students pulled their ears back, one of them whining quietly. Ace, Deuce, Grim and I all looked at one another wide eyed and remained silent. We’re not doing that again. We just stuck to passing notes and poking one another with erasers. Miraculously we didn’t get caught. Or professor Trein did not care.

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Oh God please no. Physical Education with Coach Ashton Vargas. I feel your pain Azul, anything but gym class, gyaah!

I attempt to turn around and ditch, but Deuce, Ace, and Grim have other plans and ‘guide’ me to the change room.

Thankfully they have a uniform my size with a wide range of coverage and options. Everyone swarms in finding their size. I chose the black knee length shorts and black zip up cap sleeve shirt. I opt to zip the zipper all the way up as I don’t have a tee-shirt to wear underneath and feel like wearing a long sleeve dress shirt wouldn't be the smartest move.

‘I guess I can just take this and the long sleeve and pants version P. E. uniform? It seems odd to share and to put them back on the hanger, I’m not stealing, probably.’

“You’re going to be hot with the zipper all the way up, why is it all the way up?” Deuce asked seeing me exit the changing room.

“Magicless alien with nothing to their name, remember?”

“Ah. Here you can borrow one of my extra shirts.” Deuce says rummaging through his sports bag and tossing me a navy blue shirt.

“Thanks Deuce.” I smile and run off to change.

Running to the field with my odd ragtag group, coach Vargas delivers possibly the world’s greatest motivational sports speech that could rival Rocky’s (not.)

“When I was a lad I ate four dozen eggs every morning to help me get large, and now that I'm grown I eat five dozen eggs, so I'm roughly the size of a barge! There’s no man in town half as manly, as a specimen yes I’m intimidating! No one fights like Vargas. Douses lights like Vargas. In a wrestling match nobody bites like Vargas!” Coach Vargas bellows animatedly.

“I think coach Vargas lost the plot - one too many balls to the head I fear.” I whisper to my group.

Ace, Deuce and Grim quickly cover their mouths trying not to laugh out loud.

“Thorn! Shhh! You’ll get us in trouble.” Deuce manages to whisper.

Ace gives me a high five still suppressing his laughter.

Eventually coach Vargas states a list of exercises he wants us all to do before class ends for endurance training. Run 30 laps, and 100 push ups, sit ups, jumping jacks, burpees, and various weight lifting. And if he sees us ‘goofing off’ or not ‘doing enough’ then we have to climb a rock wall.

‘Lighting a candle for my body, I pray he does not notice if I pull a one, two, skip a few.’

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Stumbling into a cafeteria table, we all lay our heads on the table to rest before eating.

“Hey, do you guys have any suggestions… On what books… I could read to learn… More about Twisted Wonderland?” I ask, panting.

“There’s history and culture books… In the school’s library.” Deuce huffs.

“Might as well start with a children’s classic… ‘Rose in the Queendom of Roses’ seems more your speed based on what you had to say… about the Great Seven.” Ace wheezes out.

‘Based off of Ace, that’s probably their version of ‘Alice in Wonderland', probably the Red Queen’s account of her experience of Alice.’

By the time we can raise our heads, we wolf down our lunch. And when our plates are empty, Deuce pulls out a colorful pamphlet.

“What’s that?” Ace and I ask simultaneously.

“A list of all the clubs Night Raven College offers. The club fair and tryouts are all happening after school today.”

Ace snatches the paper out of Deuce’s hands, “I'm soooo going to be on the basketball team!”

“Yeah you look like the type of guy that would play with balls.” I snicker at Ace.

Deuce grabs the sheet back from Ace and separates Ace and I before we can cause another scene in the cafeteria.

“I’m going to try out for track and field, how about you Thorn?”

Before I can answer, Grim interrupts with a cackle.

“These clubs wish they could have the Great Grim on their team, but I have more important things to do!”

“Like getting fat from eating tuna?” Ace asked.

“Well they ain’t gonna eat themselves.” Grim smirked, totally ignoring the fat comment.

Borrowing Deuce’s paper, I skim through the list of clubs:

Band
Basketball Club
Board Game Club
Film Studies
Football
Gargoyle Research Society
Hockey
Horse-Riding Club
Magical Shift Club
Mountain Lovers Club
Science Club
Track & Field

That’s quite the variety of clubs, truly I’m shocked to see hockey on the list, the school has an ice rink? The bell chimes signaling lunch is over, we gather our things for our final two classes of the day.

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In short, Magical Analysis with professor Trein focuses on the study and fundamentals of how to wield magic properly, like how magic is connected to our emotional/mental well being and each can affect one another. And alchemy with professor Crewel; the easiest way I can describe it would be alchemy is similar to physics while potionology is similar to chemistry.

I let out a big stretch once classes are over. Finding all these clubs is going to be an ordeal, some have their representatives in the cafeteria in booths while others who hold tryouts like the sport clubs would be in the gymnasium or field.

“Fwnna, I’m pooped. I’m heading back to ramshackle to eat tuna!” Grim announced, making his way to our dorm.

I believe Grimmy is too tired to cause mischief, I’ll check up on him after I see all the clubs, maybe I’ll join one. I can’t work all the time on finding a way home, otherwise I’ll go insane. Oh and before I return I’ll have to go to the library and check out that book Ace recommended: not that Deuce’s suggestions weren’t good, but I think reading their children’s tales will help me understand how people at Night Raven College function, like what their thought process is and how they think and perceive the world.

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Chapter Text

Book 1: A Study in Scarlet Tyrants

In A World Of My Own

Part 2

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‘Decisions, decisions. I guess I should go to the library first, it’ll probably take some time for the clubs to set up their booths and sign up papers.’

Crossing the courtyard I enter the library. What a lively place it has become! Books are practically leaping off shelves and soaring through the air to students studying at the long tables or to those who cannot reach the highest shelf.

While I bob and weave through the entrance, the deeper I go the less hectic and more quiet the library becomes. Reading the signs floating above, I find the ‘classics’ section. Scanning the spines of the book, I notice they’re organized alphabetically with the lower end of the alphabet at the bottom. Lucky for me since I have no magic and see no ladders available.

‘Rose in the Queendom of Roses, Rose in the Queendom of Roses… Where could you be?’ A scarlet spine sticks out to me - I go to pull the book from its accustomed place, but another also places their black gloved hand on the book. We both turn to look at one another; the scene could rival something straight out of a shojo manga, until he opens his big mouth.

“UNHAND THAT BOOK AT ONCE HUMAN!”

I’m confronted by a wave of spiky slicked back light green hair and matching green eyes - Sebek Zigvolt.

Refusing to let go of the book I question him, “why do you talk like that? What if we all talked like that?”

The startled face he makes, scrunched up eyebrows and downturned smile at my confrontation, almost takes me off guard.

“I’m… Sebek Zigvolt, FIRST YEAR STUDENT OF DIASOMINIA AND GUARD OF THE YOUNG MASTER!”

I can’t help but to tease Sebek, “THORN SILVANUS, FIRST YEAR AND PREFECT, CHECKING OUT THE BOOK.”

With that I snatch the book and start booking it to the front desk.

Sebek blinks, for a moment or two, until he lets out a “HEY!” and gives chase.

Fortunately, I beat what appears to be rush hour with books, Sebek however gets blocked by the traffic.

Heading to the front desk, a chair twirls around to reveal the Octavinelle student from first period.

“Ayo, it’s seastar, I’m surprised you’re able to read.”

“Hey clownfish, check out this book for me. My name is Thorn Silvanus.”

He takes my book and begins typing on the computer. “My name’s Zero Pla-Kat.”

“Zero? And you’re giving me a hard time?”

“Well ‘Zero’ is a nickname because Ritthirong is a mouthful and no one ever pronounces it right.”

“I see. Well thanks for the book, I have to go before a crocodile catches up with me.”

Zero turns back to see Sebek marching his way to the front desk and makes an ‘o’ shape with his mouth.

I grab my book and walk back to ramshackle to drop off my stuff and to check on Grimmy.

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I follow the crowd of students entering the cafeteria, the booths for some of the clubs must be here.

A few of the center cafeteria tables have been moved to make room for four different sets of tables, each with their own colored table cloths and signs.

The booth closest to me has a light green tablecloth and a banner that reads ‘Gargoyle Appreciation Society’ with various miniature gargoyle figurines and three fat gargoyle plushies. However it is uninhabited as no one seems to be managing the booth.

‘Someone give Malleus a beeper or a string or something. I can’t wait for him to show up, I’ve only got so much time to spare. Onto the next booth.’

Once I manage to push my way to the second booth, I’m greeted by a black tablecloth and banner overhead that reads ‘Science Club’ with various molecule and atom models and beakers. In charge of the sign up is a man in a white lab coat, with a belt of vials that wraps around his shoulder and torso, goggles atop his dark spiky green hair, honey-colored eyes, black frames and a small clover under the right outer corner of his eye.

“Hey, welcome to the science club sign up. My name is Trey Clover, vice housewarden of Heartslabyul. The science club may be overseen by professor Crewel but students are fairly independent where they can hone their interest or hobby of the sciences. Cooking, growing plants... Anything that has some relation to science is fair game in the science club. Pretty accommodating, right? Our club nickname is the ‘Everything Club’ due to our wide variety of activities."

“Nice to meet you Trey, the science club sounds very accommodating indeed. It’s so nice to hear that someone else shares the same sentiment that cooking and science are similar.”

Trey’s eyes light up at this, “I know right? I originally wanted to join a cooking or baking club, however Night Raven College doesn’t have one so I figured joining the science club was the next best thing.”

“You seem really passionate about cooking, how come you didn’t just create the club yourself?”

“Ah, well… In short, I thought someone else founding the club would be easier.” Trey scratches his cheek.

“Trey, I think in a way everyone thinks ‘someone else will do it’ but if everyone thinks that way nothing changes. Someone has to be the first to start something, and even if they stand alone it won’t be forever. Just like you, maybe someone is waiting for someone else to start.”

His eyes widened a bit at my unsolicited advice, I better switch gears.

“Anyways, I’d love to swap recipes with you, you know being from another world and all, I wonder if we share the same dishes or enjoy the same flavor profiles, or if even creating food is done in the same way?”

“Ha, this may be the first time I meet someone as enthusiastic as me about baking. Oh you’re that guy from orientation, so it is true, you’re really not from Twisted Wonderland?”

“That’s right, magicless alien Thorn Silvanus, prefect and first year of ramshackle dorm.” I smile.

“Yeah sure, if you’re ever at Heartslabyul, I’m usually in the kitchen when I have free time, let's experiment in baking one day.”

“Oh also, I’m trying to check out all the clubs before making a decision on which one to join, do you know where all the sign ups are located?”

Trey reaches under the table, “here’s an up to date pamphlet on where all the available clubs are located.”

“Thanks Trey, it was nice chatting with you.”

I squeeze my way out of the science club crowd and approach the third booth, Mountain Lovers Club. The poster board may read ‘mountain’ but the imagery and specimens and display cases of mushrooms would imply differently.

“Hello first year, my name is Jade Leech, vice housewarden of Octavinelle and this club's founder and only member. Are you perhaps interested in hiking through the mountains and interacting with the mountain’s wild fauna?”

Jade Leech was quite the character to behold. Heterochromic eyes, the left green and the right gold, blue hair with bangs swooped to the right with a singular longer strip of black hair on the right, paired with his sharp pointed teeth, he has certainly retained his eel traits.

“Sound’s fascinating, what has been your favorite fauna found on your hikes?”

Jade pretends to think for a moment, “I must say I am quite fond of the variety of mushrooms, if you join perhaps you would be a willing participant in my experiments - sampling them and detailing their effects?”

“Perhaps I will check out all the clubs before making my choice.” I say quickly leaving the booth to check out the final one in the cafeteria.

The sign “Board Game Club” is made out of different board game textiles, a light purple tablecloth hosts a myriad of boxes and cards with Azul and Idia at the helm.

Idia’s long and wild flaming blue hair fidgets, he hunches in on himself in his oversized blue jacket, skin paler than the moon, blue lips and bright yellow eyes point downwards to his lap.

“Welcome to the board game club, Azul Ashengrotto prefect of Octavinelle, owner of Mostro Lounge, always willing to lend a sympathetic ear and offer my other services. Here is my business card. And my board game club partner Idia Shroud, prefect of Ignihyde.”

I take Azul’s business card while Idia makes no acknowledgement of my presence.

“They say idle hands are the devil’s workshop. What types of games can I expect to play in the board game club?”

Slightly smiling at my comment, Azul elaborates.

“Any tabletop game with movable pieces or card games. Games that rely on strategy, wit, nerve or luck. They can be abstract, structural, rigid or free form. You can find almost any type of game to suit your needs and wants here at the board game club.” Azul finishes with his chin resting on the tops of his fingers with a glint in his eyes.

Azul looks me up and down and promptly asks, “you’re the magicless freshmen from another world right? You poor unfortunate soul, care to make a deal?”

“It’s a bit one-sided to think I’m unfortunate, don’t you think? I’d rather just play a game; the loser owes the winner a favor, deal? Idia, care to join our wager and pick the game we play?”

‘If I play my cards right… Idia prefers luck based games while Azul prefers strategy, Idia will pick a luck based game causing Azul to have a meltdown on not being able to think his way out of ‘fate’. Plus I consider myself a lucky person all things considered.’

“... I’ll join… I’ve got just the game… I snagged an early copy of the new edition of ‘Magical Life’.”

Idia places the unopened box on the table. The outer cover and name reminds me of the board game ‘Life’ back in my world, too bad I’ve never played it.

“You’ve got a lot of nerve to be making negotiations with me, but I’ll accept. It's a deal.” Azul says smugly.

“What’s the game about Idia?” I ask.

“Well now, if I recall that board game is a popular one.” Azul says as he opens the box.

“Yep! You move your car along the board as much as the dice lets you, and along the way, you can get married, buy a house, or blow it and go bankrupt. It's the ultimate board game themed around life's many magical experiences! So, you know. The game's exactly what it says on the tin.” Idia explains.

“Thank you, but I'll pass. I'm not particularly fond of games that hinge primarily on luck.” Azul closes the box again.

“Surprise, surprise. You only ever go for strategy games where you develop land or manage a store or whatever. Don't you get tired of having to think about every single move? Wouldn't it be nice to play something that lets you leave it all to RNG?”

“I feel exhausted just hearing about all the thinking you do for fun Azul.” I open the box again and begin setting up the board.

“Normie gets it.” Idia says, looking at Azul.

Azul crosses his arms, “there's nothing to be gained by crossing your fingers and hoping for the best. I do, in fact, never get tired of thinking about every single move. Games like ‘Magical Life’ where all you do is toss numbers are as simplistic as they are boring, and—”

“Oh, don't worry. I get'cha. The short of it is...You don't think you can win if you can't plan ahead.”

‘Idia you sly dog.’ I cover my smile with my hand.

“I beg your pardon?” Azul uncrosses his arms, turning to Idia.

“Not even a guy with your intellect can compete against luck. Can't brain your way into making dice do your bidding, right? If that's where you're coming from, then we don't have to play. I don't want to make you QQ or something.”

“Pfft! Azul you got clowned on for real.”

“And just who, exactly, do you think you're talking to? And who exactly are you laughing at? Are you implying that I would lose to the two of you in a mere game of dice?” Azul looks positively scandalized now.

Idia joins in on my chuckling, “heehee... Oh, never. I just don't want to pressure you into something you can't handle.” Idia finishes with a shrug.

“You've done it now. Very well! I shall indulge your whims today.”

“Great, G-L-H-F! Let's get rolling! Ah, but first we gotta pick the colors of our cars.”

The board looks relatively similar to ‘Life’ although I’m not sure what edition this ‘Magical Life’ is. There’s a colorful boardwalk with an urban backdrop, although there isn’t a colorful numbered spinner - that’s been replaced by dice. I pick the orange car, Idia picks the blue car, and Azul picks the white car.

As our game play progresses, the more Azul cracks under the strain of luck.

“Uh-oh. Looks like you can't move for three turns. Too bad you can't Ctrl+Z that roll, huh?” Idia mocks Azul.

“Three turns? Again...? How can my life be manipulated so by dice?!” Azul fumes.

The game has become so heated (and possibly toxic?) that we end up drawing a small crowd.

Idia rolls a five, “well, look at that! I struck oil!”

“Inside a blasted SHOPPING MALL?!” Azul yells.

“Phew! Deep breaths, Azul. It's just a game, okay? My turn is done, so go on and take another stab at it after normie’s turn.”

I roll a six and end up securing a luxury condo valued at 1,000,000 thaumarks.

“GG normie, you got the highest value house on the board.”

Azul bites his knuckles and prepares for his turn.

“... A two.”

“What do we have here? "You bought a house, but it's a major fixer-upper. You lose 500,000 thaumarks." Tough break.” Idia pats Azul’s shoulder.

“That's absurd! I would never in my life fall for such an obvious scam! This game doesn't make an ounce of sense!”

“Press ‘x’ to doubt.”

I got Idia laughing at that one, Azul however turned to me so fast I think he got whiplash.

Soon after, the game of ‘Magical Life’ came to an end. Idia won, I came in second and Azul came in last. Of course anyone could have figured that out with Azul face planted on the table and pulling his hair muttering oddities to himself. The crowd disperses shortly after.

“Whew! Azul sure was a sight to behold. I thought he'd start foaming at the mouth! Pfft!” Idia not so subtly says to me.

I cover my mouth to suppress my laughter. Azul sure is taking losing a chance game hard. I almost feel sorry for him, but then I remember his business practices and that feeling diminishes. And the way he took the game so literally, ah if this was a bit and he was a comedian he’d make a killing, truly entertaining.

“So Idia, decide on what favor you want from me and Azul?”

I wasn’t worried if Idia won, I doubt he’d ask for anything underhanded or devious like Azul would. I am surprised to see how open he was in joking with me, I guess when something you’re passionate about is involved you can set aside your reservations.

“I think I’ll save asking Azul for a favor, you on the other hand… What’s your name anyway normie?”

“Oh! My name is Thorn Silvanus, first year and prefect of ramshackle dorm.”

“Call me ‘Idia-senpai’.”

“You were quite quick to decide, had that thought parked in the garage for a while now, huh?”

Iida’s eyes got big, his hair began to shift to a warmer shade.

‘Looks like Idia’s social battery has run out and the thrill of a new game has died, leaving Idia emotionally defenseless. Hehe.’ I think to myself.

“What’s wrong Idia-senpai?” I tease.

With that Idia leaves the booth, and Azul has become absorbed in cheating the chance system by practicing his dice throws. My work here is done.

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‘Following this map… Holy, NRC has enough land to host horses?’ If the stable on this map is anything to go by. I think I’ll check out the equestrian club. I think Riddle and Sebek are members.’

Entering the field, Sebek and Silver are riding their horses and working on completing an obstacle course. Riddle stands on the outside of the fence petting his horse’s snout. I approach Riddle and his horse.

“Hi, is this the equestrian club?” I ask standing in front of Riddle and his horse.

“Rule #238 of the Queen of Hearts; ‘one must be punctual when attending events.’ You’re late, if you’re wanting to sign up you may not get in, there’s limited spots available.”

Riddle’s horse starts butting their head in my direction, I assume the horse is asking for pets so I approach the horse and pet their snout. The horse seems pleased and starts to whinny, soaking up the attention.

“What a sweet darling horse you are.” I say happily as I continue petting.

“It would appear that Vorpal likes you, she is the easiest horse to get along with. She’s known as the ‘starter horse’ due to her friendly demeanor, but make no mistake, she takes no disrespect or mishandling. She’s my preferred horse to work with.” Riddle states.

Riddle continues, “equestrian club duties include caring for your horse: keeping them and their environment clean and seeing to their needs, as well as training for riding, racing and obstacle courses. The life skills one gains from equestrian club include teamwork, communication, confidence, reduced stress, patiences, leadership, work ethic and decision-making to list a few.”

“There’s a lot of benefits to horse riding, as well as the bond you share with Vorpal. I can see why you’re dedicated to your sport.” I say to Riddle.

Sebek’s stallion trots up to Riddle and I, “UGH! YOU AGAIN?! THAT HUMAN IS A BOOK THIEF!”

“Who are you, Death? Eat shit asshole, and fall off your horse.” I stick my tongue out at Sebek.

Sebek lets out a “tsk” and resumes training, leaving me with Riddle who is turning 50 shades of red at my vulgar use of language.

Even Silver from across the field had to raise an eyebrow in confusion at Sebek’s commotion.

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I followed my map to a football field - where our outdoor gym class was held coincidentally. Muscular men practice pushing dummies, flying on their brooms or practice deflecting defensive magic either by air, ground or both. I’m so distracted by the sight that I accidentally bump into someone.

“Oof!”

“Watch where ya goin’!” A lavender haired pretty boy says from the ground.

“Sorry, I got caught up in watching the game.” I offer my hand to help the boy up but he swats my hand away.

“Yer darn right, magift has got to be the manliest sport goin’ and I’m gonna be on that there team!”

There’s practically sparkles radiating off of him.

“What’s magical shift about anyways? How do you play?” I ask as a muscular man is brought down by a zap of magic and then dog piled.

“Ya ain’t ever heard a magift?! Hooey! Let me explain ya a thing or two, it’s the most popular sport in all of Twisted Wonderland. Two teams of seven move a floating disc using their magic into a goal post to score points. Some of the players are on foot while the rest ride brooms, each can use their magic on the offense or defense.” The small blue-eyed boy is riled up now.

My thoughts swirl, ‘okay so in my limited knowledge of sports and magic it kinda looks like American football X quidditch. I’m spitballing here, it's not like I’ve seen quidditch either.’

“Name’s Epel Felmier, freshmen a Pomefiore, what’s yers?” Epel asks.

“My name is Thorn Silvanus, prefect and first year of ramshackle.”

“Ya lookin’ ta join magift?” Epel asks hopping the fence to join in on the chaos.

“Uh, no. Good luck!” I say making my way to the gym.

Pushing the doors open, the sound of squeaking sneakers and basketballs hitting the floor greet my ears.
On one side of the gym, people are wearing NRC’s basketball uniform: a black jersey outlined with gold trim and purple running up the sides with matching shorts littered in school logos and their individual numbers. On the other side tryouts are being held with people practicing their drills. I spot Ace shooting free throws. A rogue ball rolls towards me, Ace chases after the ball and sees me.

“Hey! Hey! Come to check out the soon to be basketball’s team rookie of the year huh?” Ace says, spinning the basketball on his finger.

“You caught me Ace, now point him out to me, where is he?” I make a show of pretending to search for the all star.

Ace tosses me the basketball, “are you here for tryouts? I didn’t peg you as the basketball type.”

I dribble the ball idly, “just making my rounds, checking out all the clubs before I make a decision.”

Ace attempts to knock the basketball out of my hands but I pivot and start running away with the ball.

“Hey, you can’t do that, that’s traveling!” Ace shouts.

“So catch me.” I tease.

“Oi, oi, Crabby!”

We don’t make it very far before Floyd inserts himself in the mix.

Floyd Leech is the identical twin brother of Jade Leech, with the exception of having his features mirrored, and that’s where their similarities end (allegedly). Their personalities are polar opposites; Jade puts on an image of polite and formal while Floyd seemingly laid back has drastic mood swings that make him unpredictable and seen as the more troublesome twin.

Floyd apprehends the ball from me rather easily.

“Check it out, I can spin a basketball on my finger. I picked that up from Crabby. It's pretty easy once you learn the trick.” Floyd says while flexing his skills.

“Why am I ‘Crabby’ Floyd?”

“Oh I thought he said ‘crappy’ referring to your skills on the court.” I poke fun at Ace.

Ace gives me a noogie in retaliation, “you wish, Thorn!”

Floyd’s loud laugh causes Ace to release me, “isn’t it obvious? Your bright red hair looks like a crab. Man you’re funny… Shrimpy.”

It was Ace’s turn to laugh at me, “pfft, you nailed it Floyd! Thorn really is a shrimp! Hahaha.”

“Why am I ‘Shrimp’?!’

“Cause you’re Shrimpy.” Floyd starts dribbling the ball between his legs.

“Man, passing drills are boring. Hey, Little Shrimpy. How 'bout a little one-on-one? I'll go easy on ya, don't worry.” Floyd grins sharply.

“Oi, Floyd! Get back to practice.” Jamil shouts from the opposite side of the room.

Jamil is the vice housewarden of Scarabia, he wore his deep black hair in a high up do, various braids woven throughout leaving one long left side bang out. His piercing gray eyes gave the illusion that he was wearing eyeliner. I’m surprised he ‘helped’ Ace and I. I think it’s more likely that having Floyd back at practice suits his needs more than ‘being nice.’

“I tried to steal the ball from Sea Snake during a game, but he slipped past me with a change-of-pace dribble! He won’t get by me again.” Floyd was fired up now, as he made his way back to practice.

I took this opportunity to exit the gym from the opposite doors to check out the track and field team.

The track was huge and dyed purple with white lines sectioning off different areas. Beside the starting of the track was a huge timer and a speed camera. Not so far off was a table filled with massive water coolers while colorful pylons and hurdles lay close by. Coach Vargas is shouting out orders amongst other vain words as the guys stretch for warmups or possibly a cool down before they run the track again.

That’s where I find Deuce, warming up next to the pylons with a white-haired wolf beastman with sharp pointed ears and a fluffy tail.

“Hey Deuce, how’s track and field treating you?”

Deuce rises from his standing forward fold, “Thorn! Are you joining track as well?”

“Hmm, probably not. I’m just assessing all the potential clubs I could join; I don’t want to miss out on something that sparks my interest, you know?”

“That’s fair. This is Jack Howl, fellow first year in Savanaclaw." Deuce gestures to Jack.

Jack reaches out to shake my hand, and I hesitantly take it. I understand what people mean now when they say they feel intimidated by Jack, I feel it a little too, but I’m not sure why.

“What drew you guys to the track club?” I ask.

“Aim at the finish line and run like the wind! I love how simple and straightforward track is. It's a good fit for me, I think. Plus, the track and field club isn't very big on rules. I have to be strict with myself since no one's going to keep me focused but me, and NRC didn’t have a magical wheel club.”

Jack adds on, “there’s more than marathons, there’s long jumps and sprints too. There’s a lot of tactical elements that go into competing, I never go into a race without a plan. I've also put together a solid training regimen.”

“It sounds like you two found an activity that suits you, but what’s magical wheel?”

Deuce and Jack turned to me in shock, “you don’t know what magical wheel is?!” Deuce yelled, grabbing my shoulders.

“Deuce, I’m not from here, remember? A magical wheel probably doesn’t exist where I’m from.”

Deuce clutched his pearls at the sound of that and went on a passionate explanation.

“It’s a magical motorized vehicle, whereas they use the driver’s magic power as fuel. Magical wheels truly share a bond with their riders. Unlike driving a car, there’s nothing obstructing your view, so you can clearly see how beautiful the scenery is. And on your bad days you can hop on a magical wheel, glide along the mountain paths, and it’ll clear your head of everything. I applied to set up a special interest group when I found out there wasn’t a club for it, but the Headmaster rejected it.”

“Deuce I don’t mean to be rude but of course the Headmaster wouldn’t agree to a club that lets you ride vehicles; would the club activities include racing throughout the forest after school?… What’s it look like anyways?”

Deuce pulls out his phone to a folder labeled ‘dream magical wheels’ where hundreds of images of sleek vehicles with bright neon accents that look like if motorcycles only relied on one fat wheel in the center of them.

“Oh it looks like a motorcycle but with one wheel… Like a motorized unicycle.” I say swiping through the images.

“What’s a motorcycle?” Deuce and Jack ask at once.

“Imagine a magical wheel but with two wheels, one in the front and back leaving the center empty. And of course, no reliance on magic.”

Now it was Deuce and Jack’s turn to look confused as they swiped through the folder trying to imagine such an oddity.

Deuce carries on, “Thorn, you have to try it out if you ever get the chance. The last time I got to ride one was before school started… BUT nothing in the world beats the feeling of making sharp last-minute turns and accelerating at full speed. Going as fast as possible and whipping past everything around you, your vision will start to narrow and it’ll feel like you can barely breathe. During those moments, it’s almost like you’ve become one with the wind. I love that feeling. That’s the essence of the magical wheel!”

Deuce’s eyes were sparkling at this point - it was oddly endearing to see.

“Maybe you could take me out for a spin one day Deuce, with your level of passion I trust you for a good ride.”

“Sure Thorn–” Deuce was cut off by Jack.

“Coach Vargas just told everyone to set up the hurdles and prepare for sprints. We gotta go.”

“Right! See ya Thorn!” Deuce and Jack ran off to set up.

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I finally found the theater; those dark doors really blend in with the walls. Pushing the doors open, a Pomefiore npc with a face adorned in dark freckles locks eyes with me.

“Whoa your freckles are handsome.” I accidentally let my thoughts slip out.

The npc is quiet for a moment, grabbing his short blond ponytail, “... Really? I usually cover them up on account of Housewarden Vil, but I ran out of coverup.”

“I don’t think you should cover them up if you don’t want to, strength and beauty come from our differences not in similarities. At least I think so, like when one sees a garden with variety they can appreciate the differences, a garden of only one type of flower becomes a bit dull.”

He lets go of his hair at that, “you’re pretty wise for a first year, my name is Lucas Prince, second year of Pomefiore. Are you here to try out for film studies? Fair warning, you have to audition to get in, we always have way too many actors, and if you don’t make the cut you can always join as a backstage hand which we are always in desperate need of.”

The theater is a bit dark, but the stage is illuminated, highlighting potential actors delivering their soliloquies. And standing in front of them is the steadfast Vil.

“While I do have some experience, I’d be too shy to perform in front of a crowd I think.”

“I get that. I ask to be background characters and focus on working behind the scenes, much to Housewarden Vil’s dismay.”

Vil must hear our chatter, he turns his head in our direction and scrutinizes his gaze.

Not wanting to get roped into film studies, I push open the doors once again to find what will be the last club on my list - band.

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‘I’ve never been in the second level of the school for classes, but band is held in some random classroom up here, why not just use the music room?’

When I opened the door, Lillia, Kalim, and Cater were posed in a rock band pose and called out “welcome to band!”

They were all dressed in different casual punk styles with matching alternating-colored shirts that held the club’s logo and art.

Lillia Vanrouge, vice housewarden of Diasominia, had asymmetrical bangs with hot pink streaks running through his black bob, on the sides of his head small tufts of his hair stuck out mimicking horns. His eyes are a deep red with vertical slit pupils, and he had sharp ears to boot. A highly stylized short eccentric individual.

Kalim Al-Asim, Housewarden of Scarabia, had similar ruby eyes, with short choppy white hair. Known for his cheerful disposition, a rare find in Night Raven College.

“You’re the freshy from orientation. Thanks for keeping quiet back then, you’re seriously the G.O.A.T. I’m Cater Diamond, third year in Heartslabyul, and guitarist and producer of Light Music! Kalim’s the captain, Lils is the leader; we’re ALL in charge.” Cater smiled.

“So this is what you look like when you’re not sneaking around, it’s a better look on you,” I tease Cater.

“My name is Thorn Silvanus, first year and prefect of ramshackle.” (At this point I should have a button with my introduction prerecorded.)

“Fufufu, what a lovely name ‘Thorn’, where does it come from?” Lilia asks.

“My parents…? Oh you mean what does it mean, haha. Well my surname ‘Silvanus’ just means ‘forest’, where I’m from, and ‘Thorn’ is in reference to a line of dialogue. An advisor stages a coup and takes over the kingdom becoming a tyrannical dictator, he turns the prince into a wooden soldier, but the prince persists in stopping his abuse of power. The king tells the prince ‘even as a nutcracker you’re a thorn in my side.’ To which the prince responds, ‘and a thorn to you I shall remain.’ So ‘Thorn’ means to be resilient and to stand up for what’s right even if you stand alone.”

“How interesting.” Lilia muses.

“Whoa intense! That story reminds me of a story from Scalding Sands.” Kalim

“Enough about me, haha. What does band entail?” I ask the trio.

“Our club doesn't really have a schedule or routine. We just get together when we feel like it, have some fun, and call it a day! We put on concerts and make music in our way, covers, and throw after parties!” Kalim enthusiastically added.

“Your club shirts have a seriously sick design.” I say looking at Kalim’s shirt.

Lilia cuts in, “aren't our club T-shirts simply adorable? Cater made the logo, and Kalim and I drew the art. It's our very own club masterpiece!”

“You guys are so talented. Seriously, I need a shirt like this.” (I need a shirt in general, but still.)

“Here you should take one since you like it so much.” Kalim tosses me a shirt.

Before I can refuse due to having no funds, Cater chimes in, “it’s fine, we’ve got a surplus, plus if you join you’ll need one anyways.”

“I'd love to hear some music from your homeland. How about this? I'll lay down a beat, and you sing something!” Kalim doesn’t even wait for my response, already going ham on the drums.

Cater interrupts his jam session to hear my response.

“Uh, I’m way too shy to sing something and I don’t know how to play any instruments. Sorry to disappoint.”

“Don’t worry about it! Lilia taught me how to play the drums. He was all like, "And then you go BUM! TISH! BA-DUM!" Kalim starts up drumming again, and is promptly stopped by Cater again.

“I only started playing music recently. I never used to have that kind of leisure time. That's one nice thing about my twilight years. Do let me know if you're ever interested in picking up an instrument. Khee hee hee… What do you prefer? Genial lessons or more intensive training?” Lilia gleams.

“Lilia, you're in the twilight zone.” I cover my mouth as soon as the words leave my mouth, but it’s too late, Cater and Kalim are laughing and Lilia looks like he wants to escalate the teasing.

“Respect your elders, whippersnapper!” Lilia ‘scolds’ me. Everyone laughs at that.

“Hey let’s put on a mini concert to show the freshy what we’re all about.” Cater says picking up his guitar. Lilia grabs his bass and Kalim starts drumming.

I’m not saying their playing was bad, it was certainly unique and different, Lilia’s death metal screams gave me a fright. It sounds like each person had a different song in mind to play. I was definitely caught off guard, but once you get used to it, songs like these you could jam out to in a crowd or at a party; I could not tell you what song they were covering though.

Once finished Cater asked, “hey, let me know what you thought of our playing just now! I thrive on positive feedback, btdubs.”

‘You’re really testing my limits of creativity twst.’ I think to myself.

“You know what the best thing about music is? It’s so universal that it transcends language - you can understand the emotion behind it without understanding the words.”

“Well spoken little bat.” Lilia gives a thumbs up.

“Exactly, it’s all about the vibes!” Cater adds.

“Yeah!” Kalim shouts.

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Returning to ramshackle after a long, looooong, day is almost as tiring as the labor I went through today. I see a mess of Tuna cans and scribbled paper on the low living room table which I assume are the notes Grim took in class today. I wonder if he can understand his own writing. I’ve decided to join the ‘Board Game Club’ for a few reasons, mainly to fuel my own agenda and playing a game that isn’t physical could be a nice break from reality.

I grab ‘Rose in the Queendom of Roses’ from the kitchen counter and make my way upstairs to my shared bedroom. Grim is curled up on the left pillow sleeping, mumbling about ‘being great’ and ‘monster candy.’

I open the book in an attempt to read with help from the moonlight.

‘Chapter 1: Rose Attends A Very Important Event

‘Rose’s flaming locks of cherry red hair tousled to and fro in the wind…..

'The White Rabbit had come to inform her of the Unbirthday Party, but since his golden pocket watch was broken, why she was very nearly late!........

“You could always paint the roses red.” Alison had a very unique way of being blunt with her words, and in that moment it was appreciated……….

……………

…………..

………….

“KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK!”

I rub my eyes, when did I fall asleep? I remove the book from my lap when Grim stirs awake as well. Is someone knocking at the door?

Grim stretches and yawns, “myaaah... Hey Thorn… I know it's the middle of the night, but I think we've got a visitor. Maybe it's those pesky ghosts again? They just don't know when to quit.”

“I don’t think the noise is from any ghost Grimmy.”

Grim and I travel down the stairs to the entrance to meet our mystery visitor.

I know who’s on the other side, but I do my best to sound intimidating anyways.

“Who is it?”

“It’s me. Ace! Just let me in, alright?”

“Ace, it’s the middle of the night!” Grim starts, but Ace lets himself in, in great haste.

“Bwaaah! That collar!” Grim says in alarm.

“I can’t go back to Heartslabyul House. I’m joining your dorm. For good.” Ace states resolutely.

“Myah?! Come again?!” Grim says in shock.

‘There’s no rest for the wicked.’ I think, thinking about my future at Night Raven College. This is only the beginning to the madness that has yet to unravel.

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Chapter Text

A Study In Scarlet Tyrants

In A World Of My Own

Part 3

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"I'd recognize that collar anywhere. It's the same one that psycho stuck on me at orientation! What'd you do to get shackled with that?" Grim eyed Ace's collar.

"I ate a tart." Ace rolled his eyes.

"All that for a tart? How good was this tart?" I mused.

"Yeah, that's it! That's all I did! I was a little hungry, see, so I went down to the dorm kitchen and found some tarts in the fridge. Three whole tarts! Big ones, too!" Ace exclaimed.

☆ FLASHBACK TO THE HEARTSLABYUL KITCHEN ☆

Ace crept down the staircase from his dorm room, silently stepping on the monochrome tiles, determined to enter Heartslabyul’s kitchen. He was careful not to bump into any of the misshapen furniture in the dark as he made his way to the fridge. Opening the fridge door he began to rummage through its contents.

"Man, I'm still tired from our little adventure. I missed dinner, too, and now I'm starving!
Got anything for me, fridge? ...Whoa, score! Tarts! Those look amazing! And plenty to go around, too! No one would notice if I snagged one teeeeensy little slice, right? Right. Of course not. *munch* Mmph... SO good! I'm in pastry paradise right now!"

"Of course they're good. Trey made them. His tarts are always exceptional."

Wiping the crumbs from his hands Ace continued, "yeah, but I mean... These are CRAZY good! Like, he could sell these at- wait, Housewarden?!"

Riddle stood not so far away from Ace, arms crossed, his stern expression was due to boil over any minute.

"To think that you would think to touch something of MINE... Well, I'm impressed with your audacity, at least. But the Queen of Hearts's rule 89 is quite clear. "Never eat a tart without the Queen's permission." The theft of tarts is a serious crime! Off With Your Head!"

Riddle's face was very nearly red as he whipped out his pen and materialized Ace's punishment.

Riddle left the kitchen to apprehend any other hooligans breaking curfew. Ace however, with his ego and pride bruised, left his dorm in a fit of irritation to seek refuge at Ramshackle dorm.

☆FLASHBACK END☆

"And here I am." Ace said fiddling with the lock on his new accessory.

Grim and I were quiet for a moment or two. Any way you look at it, Ace was in the wrong for the serious crime of tart theft.

"So... The point is you're both terrible?" Grim raised an eyebrow.

"You don't think that it's insane for my magic to get sealed away for eating ONE slice of tart?! For a mage, that's like having your arms and legs bound and shackled! And there were three whole tarts! THREE! It's not like he could eat 'em all himself! C'mon, you KNOW this is messed up!"

"Ugh. You're one of those people that eat other people's food in the shared fridge? You're the worst." I crossed my arms.

"What kind of answer is that?!" Ace turned to me with a shocked expression.

Grim crossed his arms in thought, "yeah, but… I mean, if there were three of 'em, they were probably for a party. Maybe it was someone's birthday or somethin'? Look at that! I'm, like, a master detective too!"

"Grimmy those omega-3's are finally kicking in. If I had known those cans of tuna would make your brain cells grow I wouldn't have been so stingy with them." I said teasingly.

"Hey! I'm not dumb!" Grim whined.

"I didn't say that, but you don't exercise confining yourself to logic and reason most days."

Ace interrupted our oncoming argument, "A birthday party huh..."

"So you were caught with your hand in the cookie jar, and Ace'd it up. You didn't even try to make amends, did you?" I gave Ace a stern look.

"Man... I thought you'd be more sympathetic! I'm a victim of the housewarden's tyranny here!" Ace huffed.

“Ace, the first time we met you tormented Grim and I until a fight broke out, then you tried to screw Grim and I over on clean up duty because you didn’t see a problem with your actions and refused to take responsibility. You’re doing it again now. I’m not going to feel sympathetic for you. And stop deflecting, Riddle wouldn't have titted if you wouldn't have tatted. Just apologize to him in the morning."

‘Damn, tired Thorn doesn’t hold back. Ace is a bit annoying though… Like three people pointed out to him his problem and he still doubles down… I’m sure everyone knows of Riddle’s short fuse and passion for using his unique magic?’

"You don't go messin' with another man's meal... Hey, wait a minute! I just realized I never got those cans of tuna the headmage promised me!" Grim shouted.

I shot Grim a look, ‘Oh goodness me, we don’t talk about Headmaster’s unreliability.’

"All right, all right. Fine. I get that I should apologize. But you're coming with me, Thorn. This was your idea, after all." Ace pointed a finger at me.

I let out a yawn, "I was planning on going to Heartslabyul soon anyways, might as well be tomorrow."

Grim and I turn to make our way back to our bed, when Ace calls out, "anyway, you got a place for me to crash tonight?"

"You were serious about that? Outside of the bedroom me and Thorn use, this entire dump is buried under a foot of dust. So if you wanna crash, you better start cleanin'!" Grim snickered.

"Dude, no way! I hate cleaning! Just let me stay with you, Thorn. I'm real slim. I won't take up much space." Ace pleads with his best puppy eyes and folded hands.

"Go home baby." I said annoyed.

Ace's eyes got wide, "...You're calling me a pet name?"

"No. I'm referring to you as an infant. You big baby."

"Tch. You're about as flexible as a brick. Well, fine. The sofa it is. Night!"

Grim and I share a look with one another before abandoning Ace to return to our slumber.

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“KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK!!”

"Duuude... Who is pounding on the door at this hour?! Bleah! Every hit kicks up a dust storm! I'm coming, I'm coming!" Ace quickly got up from the couch before a dust storm emerged in the entryway.

Behind the door stood Deuce, "I figured I'd find you here."

"Ugh Deuce..." Ace deflated.

"So, you ate the housewarden's tart." Deuce gestured to Ace’s collar.

"Oh, shut up! Like you're one to talk! Anyway, uh... Is he still mad?" Ace asked.

"Not at all. Maybe a touch irritated, if anything. A few of our dormmates overslept this morning… But only three of 'em got your treatment." Deuce said nonchalantly.

"You call that "not at all" mad?! Sounds like he's still on the rampage, to me." Ace crossed his arms.

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It was fairly early as Adeuce, Grim and I strolled through Mainstreet.

"Move it! Outta the way! Night Raven College student comin' through! Oh? Did my collar catch your eye? It is way better than the one you're stuck with! You know, the one that makes it so you can't use magic? But hey, the school could always use another janitor! Bwahahaha!" Grim tormented Ace.

‘I should probably tell Grim to stop. But a part of me doesn’t really want to.’ I smile lightly.

"Grrrrr! Trust me Grim, when I get my magic back, your hide is first up on the chopping block!" Ace attempted to chase Grim but was yanked back by Deuce.

"Didn't the headmage JUST tell you, no more incidents? Regardless, you're not going to be able to participate in class if you can't use magic. So why not just apologize to the housewarden? It's a small price to pay for having the collar removed."

‘To be fair he could still take classes, it wouldn’t be a waste, I can’t wield magic. Maybe my work is slightly different?’

"Aaaaargh! I hate this so! SO! Much!" Ace fidgeted with his collar frustration.

"Hmm. Ya know, we do still have some time to kill before class starts. And I am kinda curious about the other dorms. Guess I'll go along and scope out the place while you make with the groveling." Grim taunts to which I quickly snatch him up and carry him.

"Since when did this become a field trip?!" Ace shouted.

“Where I go Grim goes” I supplied.

“But why though?” Ace scrutinized his gaze.

“He’s my emotional support Grim.” I say smiling, scratching Grim behind his ear.

“Forget I asked.” Ace looked away from the display.

Entering the mirror chamber, I follow Adeuce into the mirror. The sight of Heartslabyul’s dormitory gives the air of ‘elegant dark academia school building.’

‘It’s still a wild concept to me how each mirror seems to host its own world, well it's more like it transports us effortlessly to different parts of the world.’

Light gray cobblestones, with grand red-rose topiaries pruned in the shape of hearts lined the entryway, paved the way to a quaint white fountain outlined by a darker red heart. A bold red building detailed in white with diamond shaped windows and a heart shaped entry laid ahead. A banner of the dorm’s logo, a heart divided down the middle of red and black with a crown atop, hung overhead the door.

“Dang, this place is swank! This is nothing like our dumpster of a dorm.” Grim announced, taking in the sights of a place that was put together and cleanly.

“Comparison is the thief of joy Grimmy. We’ll work on our dorm’s maintenance soon.”

Grim shivered at the thought of work.

“Did you down a bunch of fortune cookies for breakfast?” Ace asked.

Ignoring Ace’s comment, we deviate from the path and walk behind the building. An impressive rose maze awaited us as we entered into a ‘backyard’ of sorts, for lack of a better word.

“Aww yeah, I am getting my paint on!”

“Ah, someone's here.” Grim whispered as we turned the corner, revealing the singing stranger.

“They all gotta be red, or it's "off with my head"!” Cater sang.

His headphones were visible as stood atop the tall wooden ladder, swinging his paintbrush wildly as sang and painted the white roses red.

‘I guess Alice’s influence still prevails, but really I’m left wondering how the hash paint doesn’t wilt, dry out, or tear the flowers.’

Cater notices our presence, removing his headphones he offhandedly asked, “huh...? You guys need something?”

“What are you doing here?” Ace questioned, looking up to Cater.

“Are you blind? I’m painting the roses red, duh!” Cater gestured with his brush towards a half dripping rose.

I snickered at that, “remind you of anyone Ace?” Ace shot me a look.

“What?? Why??” Deuce looked perplexed.

“Ah ha ha. So naïve, you put the "n" in newb. Hold the phone, I know you guys! You're the ones who broke a billion-thaumark chandelier and nearly got expelled for it, yeah?” Cater slid down the ladder.

“That chandelier is going to haunt us till the day we graduate huh?” Ace muttered.

“And you! You're the one who ate the housewarden's tart last night! You guys are THE hot topic around campus! I've gotta get in on this fleeting fame. I'm just gonna grab a selfie real quick… It's cool if I post this on Magicam, right? Gimme your names so I can tag you.”

“I’m Deuce Spade.”

“Ace.”

“I’m Grim, and that’s my henchman Thorn.”

I grab Grim and use him as a shield to conceal my face from Cater’s onslaught of photo clicking.

“Uploaded! Sweet. Oh, I'm Cater Diamond, by the way. I'm a junior here at Heartslabyul. But Cater is fine. Or Cay-Cay if you're cray-cray! Soooo nice to meetcha.”

“Hey Cay-Cay, your Magicam must be dry to be relying on our mischief for a boost.” I tease.

“Ah yes Thorn, the prefect of ramshackle dorm. Still can’t believe you were telling the truth about living there! It's all gloomy and looks like hot garbage on Magicam. No filter could salvage THAT dump.” Cater made a face of disgust at mere thought of something that was not suitable to be posted.

“Y'know, you've done nothin' but diss us here, pal!” Grim frowned and crossed his arms.

“Gah, what am I doing? I don't have time to chat! The party's tomorrow. If we're not ready, it's "off with my head"! Hey, you kids wanna help me paint some roses?” Cater pocketed his phone and made his way to the paint and paintbrushes.

“Yeah, uh... Why are you doing that exactly?” Ace eyed the buckets of paint.

“Because red roses are so much more photogenic! Or...something...? And after that, I've gotta start getting things ready for the big croquet tournament. And that means coloring all the flamingos. *sigh*” Cater rubbed his head.

“You're colorin' flamingos now? Isn't anything the right color around here?!” Grim exclaimed.

“Ya seriously. Either someone is very incompetent at management or really fussy.” I say trying to wrap my head around the idea of painting flamingos.

“Now it's coming into focus, Ace. That tart you ate must have been for the housewarden's birthday. That explains his reaction!” Deuce said, hitting his fist into his palm in realization.

“Hm? Oh, no, it's not Riddle's birthday.” Cater said boredly.

“It's not? Then whose birthday is it?” Ace turned to face Cater.

“It isn't anyone's birthday. Tomorrow is our dorm's traditional unbirthday party. It's a special tea party we throw when no one has a birthday—if the housewarden feels like it.” Cater shrugged.

“And why would you do that?” Ace questioned.

“Again with the questions! Listen, I need these roses to be red. Like, yesterday. Can't you guys help out with magic or something? Oh, but Ace is on magical house arrest and Thorn is a total normie, so you two better stick to paint.” Cater handed Grim and Deuce their own paint bucket and brush.

“Recolor the roses with magic…” Deuce mumbled.

“Can't say I've ever done this before.’ Grim eyed his utensils wearily.

“Relax, it'll be fine. You got this! But maybe do it before I lose my head? K-thanx!” Cater made his way up the ladder again.

Deuce waved his fountain pen, dying the roses in an instance, “red... Red... BAM! Wh-whoa! It turned blue?!”

“Change, o foul color! Change! AHA! BWAH! The rose caught on fire!” Grim cried out in alarm.

“Wow. You're even less competent than I thought.” Cater watched from his high perch.

‘Damn Cater, it’s like their first or second day of school… Why doesn’t he just do it himself? Save him the trouble of extra work.’

Ace observed the area, “yo, maybe you should just leave the roses white! They look perfectly pretty 'n stuff to me.”

Cater chastised Ace, “it's a matter of tradition. You can't have an unbirthday party without the roses being red. And you can't play croquet without seven-colored flamingos as mallets and a hedgehog for a ball. Oh, but of course, the roses need to be white when the garden flowers put on their spring concert. That's absolutely crucial.”

“All your rules are completely insane!” Grim put his paws to his head, a headache forming no doubt thinking about memorizing all the rules.

I interjected, “why not just buy equipment that mimics these creatures, all this prep is archaic at best and redundant at worst.”

“They say the Queen of Hearts made up these rules herself - she was one of the Great Seven, you know. And Riddle is all about tradition. Probably more than previous housewardens, T-B-H. I'll admit that he's, well... a bit extra.” Cater’s eyes squinted ever so slightly.

Ace was fed up with this stuff and nonsense. “Yeah, no kidding. I sure don't have time for this nonsense. Is Riddle here? I gotta talk to him.”

“Yeah, probably. But are you sure that's wise? Did you even bring an apology tart to replace the one you ate?” Cater scrutinized Ace.

“Uh, no...? I came here first thing in the morning!” Ace shouted exacerbated.

“Ah ah ah... That could be a problem. Have you forgotten rule 53? "Stolen items must be replaced." If you're not in compliance, I can't let you in.” Cater moved to stand in front of us, blocking us from advancing further in the yard.

“Are you serious?!” Ace threw up his arms.

“All dorm residents must obey the rules. If I let you slide, it would be off with my head next! I hate to say it, Ace, but I'm gonna need you to leave before Riddle spots you. Thanx.” Cater made a shooing motion, looking over his shoulder.

“I... think this guy is for real. You guys, do something!” Ace retreated once Cater took out his magical pen.

“Why should WE do anything?” Deuce crossed his arms in annoyance.

“C'mon, please! I can't use magic! Hurry, he's—” Ace was interrupted by Cater launching a magical attack.

Quickly Grim and Deuce were pulled into the third year’s one-sided beat down on us. It was odd, although I don’t know much about defensive, offensive, or attack magic, even if Deuce or Grim got a hit on Cater, he remained unaffected. Not even flinching.

Cater expertly pushed us back to Heartslabyul’s entry, in a cheery tone and with a friendly wave he called out “do make sure you bring that tart next time, m'kay? Buh-bye now!”

“Was that guy for real?!” Ace gestured to the giant heart door.

“We hit him over and over, but he just kept coming. Maybe he was using some kind of illusion magic?” Deuce theorized out loud.

Ace continued his rant, “so lemme get this straight: we walked in there, totally tartless, but this dude still made us do that whole song and dance before throwing us out? He just wanted to make us paint his stupid roses!”

‘To be fair, Ace and I didn't pick up our brushes, but the principle still stands.’

“We sure look like a bunch of chumps.” Grim held his head low and kicked a stray pebble.

“I guess we'll just have to get an apology tart and come back. Maybe after class, we can- Oh no!”

I give Deuce a questioning look, “what’s wrong?”

“We already missed the first bell! We're gonna be late for class!” Deuce exclaimed.

Now that bit of news sent everyone in a tizzy, scrambling for the mirror chamber to rush back to class.

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Chapter Text

A Study In Scarlet Tyrants

In A World Of My Own

Part 4

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“This so-called magic academy feels a lot like a lame, ordinary school with the absence of magic used in class. At least this collar won't be much of a problem after all. You with me on that, Grim? ...Hm?” Ace turned to face Grim, but to everyone’s dismay he was nowhere to be found.

“Goddamn it Grim! I’m going to bell that cat!” I say frustratedly.

“Oh! Look out the window! I just saw a ball of fur running across the yard!” Deuce pointed where he had last seen the blur.

Rather than leisurely walking to fourth period, we all raced to the courtyard to capture a rogue Grimmy.

We could hear Grim’s voice from the stairs, “no way am I puttin' up with this boring routine day in and day out. I'm Grim, Sorcerer Prodigy, and I don't need no one to teach me how to blow stuff up!”

“Boy, that guy is not a fast learner.” Deuce said, eyes following whichever way Grim zoomed.

“Not a good look to lose your only student, prefect. Want help catching him?” Ace grinned.

Sarcastically I remark, “no Ace, I’d rather have Grim pick up new and exciting ways to blow stuff up from the streets. Of course I want help ya melon!”

“I do love the chocolate croissants at the co-op.”

“I'd do it for an iced latte at the cafeteria.”

Adeuce grinned mischievously. These schemers!

“Right away my lieges, any other financial burdens you’d like to bestow upon your humble court jester?”

“Grim's getting away... Do we have a deal, or what?” Ace smirked.

“*Sigh* Yes.”

“Pleasure doing business. Now, Deuce, shall we clean up the mess made by the worst prefect to ever set foot on campus?”

“I can already taste that latte, Ace.”

‘I’m so ‘accidentally’ dropping his croissant on the floor.’

“Mrrah! I've had it with these boring classes!” Grim yelled over his shoulder, darting back to the main building.

“Grim! You’re causing a scene! Stop running all over the place!” I yell.

“UGH! When did you get all bossy?” Grim complained, dashing into the cafeteria.

“Wooo! Lunchtime at last! Whoa! *drool* They got some good-lookin' grub!” Grim ceased in his tracks ogling all the delicious food.

The aroma and food make me pause in my tracks too, it's nice they change the fancy meals every day, but I have to ask Grim, “can you even eat squid and onion?”

‘I assume he’s capable but I’ve only ever seen him eat tuna and the forbidden monster candy, ugh don’t tell me he’s a fussy eater. On that note, I wonder how merfolk like Azul feel about seafood on the menu. Do octopus eat squid? Does it feel like his distant cousin or non-evolved ancestor or pet, or is he indifferent?’

I’m brought out of my thoughts by a hyper, loud, insistent Grim.

“Thorn, grab me the grilled chicken! There's only one left! And an omelet too. And that jelly-filled bread. Just fill your whole tray with 'em! Ow!” In Grim’s excited movements he accidentally bumps into the guy in front of us in the buffet line.

“Hey! Watch where you're goin'! M-my carbonara! You broke the yolk!” Delinquent A turned around to look our group up and down with an angry expression.

“Whoa, that's messed up! Pokin' the egg is the best part! You better make this right, pal!” Delinquent B glared at us.

“I'm gonna need that grilled chicken of yours as compensation.” Delinquent A made an attempt at acquiring the chicken with his fork but was blocked by Grim.

There’s nothing notable about these two delinquent npcs, other than they reek of richness to forgo an entire meal because something in the dish moved on their plate from motion.

“Myah?! No way! Hands off the bird, chump! I need my protein, because I am HANGRY!” Grim growled out baring his teeth.

“Hey! That's no way to speak to an upperclassman! Catch me outside and I'll teach you some respect!” Delinquent B stepped closer to us.

Before I could speak, Deuce stepped out from behind us, “um, excuse me, sir, but it said in the handbook that fighting with magic was prohibited…”

Delinquent A smiled. “Fighting? You got it all wrong. This is just me helpin' an ignorant freshman know his place.”

“Now, let's see just how many ways there are to skin a cat, heh!” Delinquent B pulled out his pen.

A small brawl in the cafeteria broke out, it was surprisingly well contained. Beavis and Butt-Head were all talk it seems. I did give Grim full permission to bite them if they got too close, he probably would have done that anyways.

Delinquent A looked to our group from where he sat on the ground. “Whoa… Didn’t know you had it in you.”

“Look, I'm gonna let you off the hook this time, but only 'cuz I don't want my pasta gettin' cold.” Delinquent B scurried away, taking Delinquent A with him.

“Oho! You’ve changed your tune. This must be so embarrassing for you.” I condescendingly called out as they retreated.

Grim had words to share with them as well. “Pffft! I knew you were all talk! You better hope I never see you again!”

‘I think NRC is rubbing off on me, or maybe it’s the odd group I find myself in, either way I better chill out.’ I think to myself.

“Can we just get some lunch already? I missed breakfast, and I'm about to collapse.’ Ace groaned searching for an available table.

Deuce let out a sigh, “I can’t believe textbook bullies are attending an academy that’s supposed to be famous for producing exceptional mages…”

Sitting down to eat, Grim chimes in. “Aw, get over it already. It's time to chow like the wind! *munch* *munch* This omelet is as fluffy as a cloud, and practically burstin' with cheese! *munch* *munch* So, I saw your guys' dorm, but what are the other ones like?”

I feel someone standing behind Grim and I, before I can turn the stranger makes himself known with a - “I'm sure you're familiar with the statues of the Great Seven? Night Raven College has a dorm themed after each one.”

Ace almost choked on his dish, “bwah! You're that guy from this morning!”

Grim watched Cater as he moved from behind us, “you tricked us into paintin' those dumb roses!”

"Tricked" is such an ugly word. Do you think I wanted to spend MY morning painting roses? It's dorm policy! I was just following orders.” Cater sat his trey down next to me putting his arms halfway up in surrender.

“And grinning like a friend all the while.” Deuce said unimpressed.

“Now, now, Deucey. Outside of the dorm, I don't care what rules you follow. Here, I'm just a friendly mentor figure!” Cater sat down beside me grinning at Deucey.

“Please. Do NOT call me Deucey.” Deucey said as firmly as he could to an upperclassman.

Another challenger approaches, “ah ha ha. That's how Cater shows he cares.”

I turn to Cater. “Where’s my nickname then Cay-Cay?”

“Don’t you worry that pretty little head of yours Thorny.”

“Oh that was awful. Do better. Try harder.” I say in mock sympathy and turn back to finish my meal.

Trey takes a seat at our table next to Cray-Cray Cay-Cay.

“And who are you?” Ace looks Trey up and down.

“Ah, I should introduce myself. The name's Trey. Trey Clover. I'm a junior at Heartslabyul, like Cater here. And Thorn you weren’t kidding when you called your dorm ‘ramshackle’ that dump of a- ah, I mean the ‘rustic dorm’ lives up to its name. Thanks for looking out for our boys the other day.”

“I don't recall inviting you to sit with us…” Ace said.

“That’s right, it’s against the rules and you can’t sit with us. It’s so unfetch.” I joke; however, everyone just looks at me with zero comprehension.

“Hey now, we're all from the same dorm, right? Let's try to get along. Here, gimme your digits.” Cater whips out his mobile practically vibrating in excitement of adding more numbers to his collection.

“Cater I don’t have a mobile phone, and you’re starting to sound like a senior who creeps on the freshmen. Chill out a bit.”

Cater starts up again more animatedly at that piece of information. “For real? I've read about luddites like you, but never imagined I'd meet one in the wild! It's okay, baby! Relax! Relaaaaax! I know a place that sells the latest models cheap. How about you and I go on a phone-shopping date?’

I know Cater doesn’t mean what he says in an inappropriate way, but he’s not beating the allegations with those lines! Read the room Cay-Cay! Got the whole table looking mortified at your boldness!

Seeing the group's expression shift to shock, Trey intervenes. “Cater. You're freaking out the freshmen. Maybe take it down a notch?”

‘I could use this to my advantage, especially if he’s willing to pay for it. I’ll pay him back of course, probably in small installments. I’m not THAT far gone yet to start thinking like a villain. He’ll probably want me to follow and like all his Magicam posts in return.’

“I’ll take you up on your phone-shopping date offer Cay-Cay.” I smile sweetly to him.

Round two of the whole table looking mortified. Adeuce are pulling on the ends of my sleeves in an attempt to pull some sense into me. Grim’s jaw is on his empty plate.

Cater has sparkles floating around his head. “Great! Thorny I’m going to show you a whole new world through the lens of Magicam! Come by the dorm when you're free for our phone-date, ‘kay?”

Ignoring everyone’s looks of bewilderment Cater gets us back on track. “What were we talking about... The dorms, yeah? Ah, what fun to mentor new students! Go ahead, A-M-A.”

“Before you get into the other dorms, I wouldn't mind learning a bit more about ours. Like, what's the deal with all this "Queen of Hearts rule number whatever" junk?” Ace asked.

“I'm sure you're familiar with the legendary Queen of Hearts already? She had to rule over a kingdom of weirdos and did it by emphasizing order and making strict rules.” Trey explained.

‘Oh yeah when he puts it like that, I forgot just how weird those oddballs could get. But still laws are supposed to shift and evolve or be eliminated with time; as our understanding and morality changes. And it seems to me that the punishment for any rule broken is ‘off with your head’ - which would have the opposite desired effect. If all roads lead to the same destination, does it even matter what you do?’

Cater’s voice breaks my train of thought.

“Our dorm, Heartslabyul, is an homage to her. By tradition, we wear armbands with the red and black of the Queen's dress. And we live by the rules she created.” Cater placed his arm wearing the band on the table.

“Pfft. Can you make me any more bored?” Grim said, I quickly put a hand over Grim’s mouth.

“Now, the degree to which we adhere to the rules depends on the sitting housewarden. Past wardens have been much more lax.” Cater sighed.

“Riddle though? He doesn’t mess around. Basically, you could say that we're honoring that tradition to the utmost extent possible.” Trey said.

Ace makes a face at that. “Bleah. Just my luck…”

Grim pushes my hand down and asks, “so what are the other dorms like, then?”

Trey takes the lead.

“As Cater mentioned earlier, the dorms of this school are themed after the Great Seven. We have our dorm, Heartslabyul, modeled after the strictness of the Queen of Hearts. To run down the rest of them for you, we have...
Savanaclaw, based on the persistent spirit of the King of Beasts.
Octavinelle, based on the benevolent heart of the Sea Witch.
Scarabia, based on the mindful personality of the Sorcerer of the Sands.
Pomefiore, based on the tenacity of the Fairest Queen.
Ignihyde, based on the diligence of the king of the underworld.
And finally… Diasomnia, based on the noble spirit of the Thorn Fairy.”

“Self-explanatory enough.” I casually say, taking a sip of whatever iced tea I grabbed.

“All those names are way too long! How's anyone supposed to remember 'em?” Grim whined.

Cater laughed, “ah ha ha! Well, you get the idea. Want to or not, you'll learn them soon enough.”

“At orientation, the Dark Mirror picks a dorm for you based on the essence of your being. As a result, each dorm ends up with a distinct sort of... flavor, we'll call it.” Trey pushed up his glasses.

“I think the Dark Mirror is suffering from profiling lowkey.” I say under my breath.

Cater either heard what I said or is referring to Trey as he says, “that is sooo true. I totes see it.”

"Flavor," huh...?” Deuce put his hand to his chin, considering Trey’s words.

“For example, look at that guy.” Trey gestured his head to the left.

“A muscular dog man…” I say slowly.

Trey continues. “That rough-and-tumble vibe he's got has Savanaclaw House written all over it.”

Cater jumps in, “no doubt. That dorm is full of scrappy guys who are into, like, working out and fighting. How should I describe the vibe...? Macho dudes? Gruff big brothers? Something along those lines. The black and gold armband is another giveaway.”

“Huh. All right, so what about that guy with the gray and purple cord wrapped around his arm?” Grim points to said student sitting a few tables over.

“He's gotta be from Octavinelle House. And the student sitting at the table in front of him has a red and gold armband—Scarabia colors.” Trey clarifies.

“Those dorms are for the smart students. They're always neck-and-neck in the academic rankings. Ah, but the current housewarden of Scarabia doesn't seem to be all that great of a student…” Cater starts going off about something else entirely.

“And here Cater goes, off on some tangent.” Ace almost groaned.

“Ha. You learn fast. Let's get back on topic. You see the flashy one with the purple and red armband? Those are Pomefiore colors.” Trey carries on.

“Whoa! The girl with the potion books, I really like her!”
“What's she doing in a boys' school?!”

Grim and Deuce exclaim as they track Epel’s movements.

Ace rolls his eyes. “You two are such morons. There aren't girls officially enrolled here..’

“Don’t be so rude to that guy.” I scolded the duo.

“WHAAAAT?!” The dummies shouted.

The commotion caused Epel to look at our table, where the majority were already looking at him. He walks away visibly confused.

“Speaking of girls, there's a portrait in the west hall who's a real beauty. Name's Rosaria. If you'd like to meet her, I'd be happy to introduce you. Maybe we can set something up?” Cater winks.

‘The more I hear Cater speak, the more inclined I am to feel that he and Idia would really hit it off as friends: chronically online solidarity.’

Ace looks visibly disturbed. “A painting? Hard pass! I don't care how cute she is if she's two-dimensional!”

“Come on, man. Who cares how many dimensions she's got! Anyway, they take vanity pretty seriously at Pomefiore. It's basically a dorm full of models. Their housewarden has 5,000,000 followers on Magicam.”

Trey objects. “Hey now, they're not all just pretty faces. The students at Pomefiore are among the best at potions and casting curses.”

“Heh heh. True dat. Next, we have Ignihyde... Their armbands are blue and black, but I don't see any around here. They tend not to be the most outgoing of students. Even I don't have a single friend from that dorm. They're kind of the polar opposite of us sunny, fun-loving Heartslabyuls.” Cater cheerfully supplies.

“So they're gloomy and miserable?” Grim muses.

“Hey, no need to put it like that! They just have a reputation for being quiet and serious, is all. That dorm tends to attract magical-energy engineers and students who are good with tech.” Trey says.

“And that just leaves... Diahonyalara, was it?”

The face I give Deuce at his pronunciation, is not so dissimilar to that of Ken from the Bee Movie where Vanessa had just informed him, she was suing the human race.

“...What?” I quietly said, still visibly confused.

Ace keeps his laughter at bay from my look to ‘help’ Deuce out. “You were off to a good start, and then you rammed right into the guardrails. It's "Diasomnia."

Deuce becomes all flustered. “I know that! I just misspoke, all right?”

“Diasomnia House is, hm... Ah, look over there. Those guys in the special seating area. You can tell from the neon green and black armbands. They're basically campus celebrities. The vibe they give off makes it real hard for regular schmucks like us to even approach them. And their housewarden is that times a thousand.” Cater explains.

I look over, ‘oh it's Lilia, Sebek and Silver. Still no Mal, at this point I’m starting to think he’s a concept rather than a real person.’

“There's a little kid in that group!” Ace points.

“Back on your not believing in dwarfs BS Ace?” Ace attempts to pull my arm again but I evade.

Trey, ever the mentor, clarifies. “Ah, we do get some child prodigies here. But that guy there is no kid. He's a junior like us. Name's-”

“Lilia. Lilia Vanrouge.”

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!”

The whole table got their vibe checked free of charge. I never took my eyes off the Diasominia group, and I didn’t notice Lilia leave. And yet he floats upside down in front of us, like a freaky large bat. Is he just that fast or can he teleport? Unnerving highkey.

“H-he just teleported!” Grim’s eyes are still wide in shock.

“I understand my apparent age interests you? As this bespectacled fellow accurately noted… Despite my fresh-faced, boyish good looks, it would be inaccurate to call me a "child."

"Fresh-faced," he says…” Trey mutters.

Lilia flips rightside up and stands behind Ace and Deuce. “You need not gawk at us from afar. You may feel free to speak with us directly. We are schoolmates, are we not? All of us at Diasomnia House welcome you without reservation.”

Despite Lilia saying so, the stern and serious expressions Sebek and Silver give our table says otherwise.

“And yet, those guys over there aren't exactly rolling out the red carpet in terms of approachability…” Deuce states.

“Ah well, those looks might be directed at me since Sebek and I got into some sort of spat yesterday…” The table implores me to elaborate with their eyes.

“Sebek and I wanted to check out the same book, while he was busy looking down on me for being human I checked it out. Honestly, who holds a grudge over a library book? Anyways, later when I ran into him again at the stables he called me a thief and I told him to fall off his horse and eat shit.”

Laughs filled the table, save for Trey and Deuce who looked mildly mortified.

“I assure you that is not the reason for those looks, Thorn.” Lila chuckled.

I just smile at Lila and chuckle.

“Forgive me for appearing above you during your meal. I do hope we can speak again.” Lila takes his leave, walking back to his table this time.

“Their table has got to be over twenty yards away from ours. And they overheard our conversation? That's WAY creepy!” Ace whispered shouted once he thought Lila was out of earshot.

Trey spoke up, “well... Diasomnia House does have a bit of a reputation for having lots of special students. Some of them are extremely talented at magic. Their housewarden, Malleus Draconia, is considered to be one of the five best mages in the world.”

“Malleus is reeeeeal bad news. Though I suppose the same could be said of our own dear housewarden.” Cater said.

“No kidding! He collared me for eating one slice of tart! All his rule obsession is outta control!” Ace started ranting.

“My "rule obsession" is "outta control," is it?”

Ace didn’t stop, “you bet it is. Riddle's just a petty tyrant who leans into the whole "rules" schtick as a pretext to keep everyone under his puny thumb!”

A certain red-haired individual has snuck up on Ace again, no matter how much our eyes bugged out Ace carried on until Deuce couldn’t take it anymore.

“Ace, behind you.”

Turning his head ever so slowly he made eye contact with his enemy. ‘Bwahhh! Housewarden!”

“Hey, Riddle! What's shakin', pal? You're lookin' adorbs, as always!” Cater tried to diffuse the rising tension.

“Hmph. Cater, keep running that mouth and you'll lose it - along with the rest of your head.” Riddle said.

“Sorry! Sorry! My bad.” Cater rubbed the back of his head.

“Myah?! You're the guy who put that stupid collar on me at the orientation ceremony!” Grim pointed at Riddle.

“And you're the new students who were nearly expelled. I'll ask that you not refer to my signature spell as a "stupid collar.” The headmage's habit of tolerating rulebreakers like you is going to send this entire campus spiraling into chaos one day. Those who break the rules should have their heads removed immediately, without exception.” Riddle stated firmly.

“Dude, seriously? This guy looks like a wimp, but talks like a monster!” Ace turned back to the seated group.

“The headmage may have forgiven you, but if you break any further rules, I assure you I will not.” Riddle stated.

“So, uh, listen, housewarden, sir... Any chance I could get you to remove this collar?” Ace sheepishly asked.

“I had intended to remove it once you'd taken an opportunity to reflect upon your crimes. But I've not detected so much as a hint of remorse in the foolishness I've heard you spout today. So I think I'll let you keep that for a while. Don't worry. The freshman curriculum is more focused on magical theory than practice. And your inability to use magic will help prevent incidents along the lines of what happened earlier. Now, if you've finished your meal, you should quit gossiping and prepare for your next class. Rule 271 is quite clear: "One must leave the table within fifteen minutes of completing their lunch." You DO understand what happens to rulebreakers, I trust?” Riddle crossed his arms and looked down at the members of his dorm.

Ace sighed, “more insane rules...”

Riddle interjected. “I believe you mean to say “yes, Housewarden!”

“Yes, Housewarden!” Deuce and Ace said simultaneously.

“Very well then” Riddle uncrossed his arms.

“Don’t worry, I’ll keep an eye on them.” Trey said resolutely.

“Hmm. As vice housewarden, I trust you'll avoid any further indiscreet conversation. Now, as per rule 339… "The post-meal beverage is to be lemon tea with two sugar cubes." Thus, I must go to acquire my sugar cubes. Farewell. Don't even get me started on their violation of running out of sugar cubes...!” Riddle turned on his heel to secure his sugar cubes, one would assume.

“Yeesh! That was terrifying.” Cater deflated from putting on an air of chipperness.

“That guy... has some serious issues.” Grim watched Riddle’s figure disappears into the crowd.

“Hey, don't disrespect him!” Deuce defended.

“Is the housewarden gone?” Heartslabyul student A whispered loudly.

Turning my head I watch two Heartslabyul students rise from where they hid behind their table’s chair.

“I totally just broke rule 186, "Never eat a hamburger on Tuesday." I don't know what I would have done if he'd caught me! *Sigh*... I wish he wouldn't come here so we could at least eat lunch in peace.” Heartslabyul student B shivered.

Cater and Trey had the good grace to look on silently.

I couldn’t help myself, I had to ask. “Is that why you came to sit with us? To do damage control?”

“Riddle managed to secure the housewarden title before the end of his very first week at school. I know he can come off a bit harsh, but he's not a bad guy. Everything he does, he does because he thinks it'll improve the dorm.” Trey reassured us.

“Would a good guy go around putting collars on strangers' necks?” Grim frowned.

Cater and Trey could only half-heartedly laugh in deflection.

“Grim, to be fair you were out of control, Riddle collaring you was deserved.” I said.

“Grrrrr... But that collar really hurt, and it shut off all my magic! That's just rude!” Grim grumbled.

“Hm? You're curious about Riddle's signature spell?” Cater asked looking up from his phone.

“That means, like... It's a spell that only he can cast, right?” Deuce questioned.

“I doubt he's the only person in the whole world...But yes, a signature spell is a magical ability that is, generally speaking, unique to its user. You'll learn about them in class soon enough.” Trey finished.

“Riddle's signature spell allows him to temporarily seal away the magic of another.
The spell is named…” Cater was interrupted.

“Off with your head!” RIddle was heard elsewhere in the cafeteria - the Heartslabyul dorm shuddering.

Grim looked to where he thought Riddle was. “Even the name is completely psycho!”

“To a mage, losing the ability to use magic is about as painful as losing your head completely. Which is why all of us at Heartslabyul House try hard not to violate Riddle's rules.” Cater explained.

“And as long as you are following the rules, Riddle isn't so scary.” Trey added.

I rolled my eyes at that, but chose to say nothing. ‘What do they think will happen when their dormmates get fed up living in fear? That fear will turn to anger, and after everyone is collared what then? Collar them again? They're already at the threshold of Hell. Can’t send them to double Hell.’

Ace spoke, “speaking of which - are you still not gonna let me into the dorm until I buy a tart, Cater?”

Cater continued scrolling on his phone. “Don't @ me, but... yeah. That's rule 53, so my hands are tied. Also, Riddle always looks forward to having the first slice of a tart. So if you want him to forgive you, you had better bring a whole tart!”

“What happened to "We're all from the same dorm, let's try to get along?" Throw me a bone here!” Ace groaned leaning against the table.

“That's one thing. This is another.” Cater sing-songed.

“A whole tart has gotta be pretty expensive.” Deuce thought out loud.

“Seriously? I don't have that much money!” Ace said.

“Then why not make one yourself? Trey made those three tarts by hand, after all.” Cater gestured to Trey.

Ace’s eyes got wide. “You made those tarts, Trey? That's incredible! That was like something you'd find at a bakery!”

“Heh. I appreciate that. We do have most of the stuff you'd need, but… I'm afraid I'll need something from you in return.” Trey’s glasses gleamed.

“You're gonna charge me to make it?! What kinda racket...?!” Ace started but was quickly cut off.

“Nah, I wouldn't take money from a freshman! But Riddle wants a chestnut tart next, so I'm gonna need you to gather a ton of chestnuts.” Trey lightly laughed.

“Like that's any less of a hassle. But... fine. How many do you need?” Ace asked.

“Well, it's for the unbirthday party, so... Probably two or three hundred?” Trey stated.

“Did you say HUNDRED?!” Ace and Deuce yelled in unison.

“And they're all gonna need to be boiled, shelled, and pureed.” Trey tagged on.

“Aight, I’mma headout.” Grim said pushing his trey away to leave.

“I smell another Cater painting scheme, I’m out.” I stand to leave.

“I’m leaving too.” Deuce stood up.

“You heartless cowards!” Ace yelled.

Cater put his phone down. “Hold up! Haven't you ever heard that food tastes better if you make it with your friends? This'll be a memory to treasure! It could even be your chance to make a splash as a cooking blogger!”

“Don't tell Riddle, but chestnut tarts are at their tastiest when eaten right out of the oven. And the only people who get to experience that culinary privilege are the ones who make it.” Trey put his silver tongue to work, and it paid off.

“Well, when you put it that way... Come on, humans, let's do this!” Grim grabbed my sleeve in an attempt to have me sit down again.

“Seriously Grim?” I had to laugh a bit on how earnest Grim was.

“I heard there's a whole bunch of chestnut trees in the woods behind the campus's botanical garden.’ Trey said.

That got me thinking. ‘There were chestnut trees? I didn’t notice any when I was in the forest… Of course I haven’t seen one before, but I do know that the nuts are acidic and prickly to pick. I’ll have to source some thick gloves from somewheres.’

“Cool. Plan made. Let's meet at the botanical garden after last period.” Ace declared.

“We're gonna be up to our ears in chestnuts!” Grim cheered.

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Chapter Text

A Study In Scarlet Tyrants

In A World Of My Own

Part 5

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The forest behind the botanical gardens isn’t that much different from where I stumbled off into close to ramshackle. It’s a more optimistic atmosphere since the sunlight has nothing to break through as the trees are spaced further apart and the terrain is uncluttered and even. Some of the trees however are new to me, they look like your standard green leaf and brown bark tree, but there’s patches of yellow and green spikes in them, and the area surrounding them have fallen chestnuts. Despite knowing that gloves would be necessary, I decided to let the trio figure that out for themselves. I feel like they’d argue with me on that chestnuts are smooth and brown rather than green and spiky before they’re peeled, hehe, small victories for me I guess.

“Whoa! There really are a ton of chestnuts just layin' around. I'm gonna be livin' large on chestnut tarts! Mmm! Let's get grabbin'-” Grim quickly snatched the solitary chestnut. “YOWCH! Myah! The chestnut spines pricked my paws!”

Deuce surveyed the area and sighed. “I don't think we can do this with our bare hands. And we need something to put them in, too.”

‘I’d love to torment these clowns on how they all failed to think ahead, but I too did not consider transportation. I am not immune to propaganda, Garfield was right.’ I think as I try not to laugh.

“Maybe we can find some supplies in the botanical garden?” Ace suggests.

“Let's take a look.” Deuce said, as we all walked back to the botanical garden greenhouse.

The exterior of the green house was exceptionally tall with green stained glass paneling. A sign on the inside of the door read: ‘Temperate Zone.’ Ace pushed open the door, a gust of warm yet misty cool air greeted us.

“Whoa, I didn't realize this place was so huge.” Ace marveled as he spun around taking in the sight.

While the exterior was humble and common, the interior was grand and luxurious. A plethora of colorful flowers hung in all directions, lush emerald foliage encased the scene, shimmering clear bodies of water travestied throughout the area with small arched bridges to cross them. Small clusters of potted plants were dispersed along the brown tri-toned stone walkway. Altogether it made for an elegant organized chaotic look. I could recognize a few plants, but after reading through the list professor Crewel provided for us of 100 herbs and poisons, names of which I had never heard of, most were foreign and perhaps embedded with properties nonexistent on earth.

“If it's this large, it's got to have a groundskeeper. Let's split up and look.” Deuce said as turned to face the group.

“Sure. Dibs on the right side.” And with that, Ace was already sprinting off to the right.

“Then how about I go left, while Grim and his prefect go straight ahead?”

“Sure thing Freddie.” Before Deuce can say anything more, I’m running up to Grim as I spot him gazing up towards a bright red fruit. As I run however I step on something that feels less firm than the stones under my shoe, squishy yet its shape retains, like a thin rope?

“Hey, come take a look at this! There's a ton of fruit growing here! Smells like they're ripe, too!” Grim salivated, paws reaching for the fruit.

“Hey! You got some nerve steppin' on my tail and just walkin' away!” A gruff voice shouts, startling us.

Leona approached us. His effortlessly tousled brown mane, fuzzy ears and piercing forest green eyes set on us. The lazy lion beastman was ticked.

Grim looked Leona up and down and asked, “are you the groundskeeper? Not sure you oughta be talkin' to students that way, pal.”

“Ain't nothin' worse than bein' in the middle of a good nap and havin' some jerk step on your tail.” Leona turned to me with his arms crossed and eyebrows furrowed.

“I’m sorry for stepping on your tail, but perhaps don’t leave your tail ‘lion’ where people walk then?” I wasn’t going to be intimidated by Leona, anyone in the botanical garden had a chance of stepping on his tail if he just let it lay on a footpath.

Leona’s demeanor shifted. “You... I know you. You're that herbivore from orientation who couldn't use magic. *sniff* *sniff*”

“You’re going to sniff me about it?” I was just about to push Leona’s nose away from my head and neck, when he suddenly pulled back.

“Huh. It's true. You don't smell of magic at all. Well, can't say it'd be much fun to hurt someone so helpless. Still gonna do it, though.” Leona said smugly, arms crossed once again but with a smirk rather than a look of anger.

Grim shivered. “I dunno what's up with this guy, but when he looks at me, it makes every follicle of fur stand on end…”

“No one gets to stomp on my tail and just walk away without payin' the price.
I'm in a bad mood on account of bein' woken up from my nap, too. That's gonna cost you a tooth.” Leona cracked his knuckles and neck, prepared for a one sided beatdown.

I stay silent as a million thoughts rush through my head. ‘I can’t mansplain, manwhore, manipulate my one out of this one.’

“Thorn! Cheese it!” Grim shouts, turning away from Leona. I pivot and come face-to-face with another beastman, blocking our exit route.

“Leona! There you are!” Ruggie calls out.

“Heh?” Leona eloquently says, one eyebrow raised in question.

“I knew I'd find you here! We got after-school classes today, remember?”

“Ugh... And now I've got this guy on my tail…” Leona groaned.

“Leona, you've already had to repeat one year. If you get held back again, we'll be in the same grade!” Ruggie chuckles unsympathetically.

“Oh, put a sock in it already. I'm tired of all yer yappin', Ruggie.”

“Look, you think I like always being on your case? C'mon, man. You act like it'd be hard for you. You could skate through life if you'd just TRY. Come on! Let's go already!” Ruggie turned around, not watching to see if Leona would follow as he knew he would.

Once Leona had passed and sided eyed Grim and I he called out, “hrmph... Next time you stink up my territory, there's gonna be a price to pay, herbivores!”

Once Leona and Ruggie had left the botanical gardens, Grim spoke. “Myah! I don't like the sound of that! What is up with this nutso?”

I let out a sigh. “Heaven knows Grimmy. I think it would be best if we stay clear of that lion, just in case.”

Not long after the doors had shut, Ace and Deuce found us.

“Yo, guys, we found baskets and tongs.” Ace said, raising said items.

Deuce realized Grim and I were frozen to the spot, Grim’s fur on end and my eyes wide. “What in the world happened to you two?”

Grim shook the intimidation away. “Oh, right, the chestnuts! We gotta gather those chestnuts so I can get my tart on! We'll fill 'em in on the crazy groundskeeper while we forage.”

I followed suit and shook the threat off. “It’ll be a great story for when we work.”

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Returned to the forest behind the botanical gardens, each of us had picked a tree to farm and had our equipment at the ready. As we plucked and gathered I started off the story. “It all started when I ran over to check up on Grim and felt….”

………..

“...and then he peaced out!” Grim finished, wiping the seat off his forehead.

Without missing a beat Ace commented. “Yeah, no way was that guy the groundskeeper.”

“Y'know, now that I think about it, he WAS wearin' the golden vest of that sabana dorm.” Grim closed his eyes recalling the memory.

“Mackerel…? You mean Savanaclaw? You know, I'm starting to think that there's an awful lot of delinquents here at Night Raven.” Deuce said, with a huff, fed up with crossing paths with these types of students.

“You’re one to talk, chicken instigator.” I tease, Deuce’s face heats up at the memory.

Ace looks at our filled buckets. “All right, that should be enough chestnuts. Let's get these baskets over to Trey!”

“Myahaha! Now that we're all gassed up, it's destination: Flavortown, baby!”

“ Let’s go, Guy Fieri! We’re cooking now.” I laugh as I walk alongside Grim, Grim laughs too as he boasts about his culinary skills.

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“Welcome back. Looks like you got plenty!” Trey said, turning away from the sink.

“Now you can make us some massive tarts!” Grim cheered, as we dumped our chestnut hoard onto the kitchen island.

Trey looked down at our collection and said, “well, the bigger the tarts, the harder it'll be to peel all these nuts, so... good luck with that!”

“We have to peel all of these...? Suddenly the whole room is spinning…” Deuce’s eyes twirled as he began to teeter, I pushed him upright and held his shoulders.

“Preparation is the key to good baking.” Trey winked as he wiped his hands on his apron and stood off to the side.

“Yeah, yeah, I know. We've come this far. We're not giving up now!” Ace rolled up his sleeves and dove straight into prep work.

“Oi, that’s the spirit (jackass)” I whispered that last part as I washed my hands, but Ace heard me anyway and threw a peeled chestnut at my back.

“Ace-hole!”

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Chapter Text

A Study In Scarlet Tyrants

In A World Of My Own

Part 6

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Our assembly line of preparing the chestnuts, as well as pureeing them went about as smoothly as one can imagine. After some trial and error everyone was able to smooth out any hiccups and delegate tasks accordingly.

“There! Finally got 'em all pureed!” Ace wiped the sweat of his forehead, beaming with pride.

“My arm is killing me…’ Deuce clutched aforementioned arm.

Trey put a hand on Deuce’s shoulder reassuringly. “Nice work. It'll be all the sweeter for your pain!”

Grim sniffed the air, gazing longingly at the bowls of chestnut paste. “The smell alone already has me droolin'...”

“I just need to add butter and sugar to the chestnut paste, and a sensible splash of oyster sauce - that's my secret ingredient!” Trey said confidently.

Equal looks of shock and disgust washed over everyone’s face as we all yelled “oyster sauce?!”

I shot Trey a look that read ‘you’re so full of it.’ Trey in turn gives me a look that begs for my cooperation. Silently agreeing, I ask Trey “damn y’all eat like this?”

Trey chuckles, not breaking character. “Yep. The umami of the oysters gives the cream a deep, savory flavor. I use this one here: Walrus-brand Young Oyster Sauce. All the best bakers use it in their tarts.” Trey reveals the sauce bottle out of his apron pocket for all of us to examine.

“Really? But isn't oyster sauce like, super salty?” Deuce questioned.

Ace cut in, “some folks put chocolate into curry, don't they? Maybe it's the same idea.”

Trey couldn’t take how seriously they were taking his little prank. “Pfft... Ah ha ha ha! I'm totally lying! No one in their right mind would put oyster sauce into a pastry.”

“What?! So you were just yankin' our chain?” Ace looked at Trey in semi-betrayal.

“Ah ha ha! I mean, if you'd used your brain, you'd have realized how ridiculous it was! Let that be a lesson to you. Don't believe everything you hear.” Trey pocketed the oyster sauce once more.

Grim let out a puff of air. “Feh. And here I thought that human was actually somewhat decent.”

“Am I a joke to you?” I asked Grim.

“Next, I'll put in the cream… Oh!” Looking at the kitchen, Trey realized they were in trouble.

“What's wrong?” Ace asked, not seeing the issue with whatever caught Trey’s attention.

“You guys gathered so many chestnuts that we may have overdone it with the chestnut paste. I don't think we have enough cream to mix in.” Trey gestured to the number of bowls on the kitchen island.

“So don’t use that much then? Save the rest for something else? Simple solutions my guy.” I look at Trey wondering if chestnut paste is possible to store, I’ve never had it before.

Trey gives me a sheepish look, “well–” however, Deuce buts in,“then I'll go buy some. Do they sell it at the school store?”

Sigh of relief, Trey answers. “They sell pretty much everything, so... probably. Can I have you pick me up a few other things? I need two cartons of milk, two packs of eggs, some muffin cups, five cans of fruit…”

‘He’s buying the whole damn store.’ I think as his list carries on.

Even Deuce sweat drops at the long list. “I don't think I'll be able to carry all that back. Thorn, could you come with me?”

“Sure Deuce, I haven’t been to the school store yet.”

“Then I'm comin' too! I'm getting dizzy from all this stirrin'. I need a break!” Grim whined.

☆ MR. S’s MYSTERY SHOP ☆

As we walked along the cobblestone path, tucked away was a secluded courtyard. A decently sized brick house surrounded by various, quite frankly, freaky and creepy artifacts came to view.

Deuce opened the door for Grim and I, inside was encased in a purple hue with a giant green glowing chandelier illuminating the shop. A grand piano was being used to store various wares, masks, magical artifacts, and other such voodoo and witchy bobbles littered the shop.

“Hello, can I get some he- Whoa. This shop is wild. They have crystal skulls, grimoires, taxidermy... Uh, I don't even know what animal that is!” Deuce lost his original train of thought, sidetracked by the random items.

Grim pulled on Deuce’s sleeve, “you think they really sell cream here?”

“Yeah… This shop doesn’t scream groceries or look convenient to me.” I avert my eyes from the unnerving beady eyed taxidermy… Thing.

The man, the myth, the legend himself, raises from behind the counter. “Greetings, my stray imps, how fare you today? Welcome to Mr. Sam's Mystery Shop. What among my humble selection interests you? A charm from a secluded land? The mummified remains of an ancient king? A cursed tarot card?” While Mr. S says this, various knickknacks shift from his hands, as if they have a mind of their own.

Known as Mr. S, or simply Sam, he is a dark charismatic businessman with magenta eyes. A patchwork top hat with a small skull decoration sat upon his black and purple locs, flipped to the right side, his left side having an undercut. Beneath his maroon blazer, a necklace adorned with long, sharp-looking bones, perhaps teeth, rested against his skeletal markings; his neck and clavicle continued the motif downwards until his bright purple vest, and traversed up the exposed places of his arms. A black apron tied the look together, bones and green objects poked out of one of his pockets.

“Myah! I wasn't expectin' this kinda selection”. Grim says eyeing the items apprehensively.

“Um, we wanted to buy all the items on this list…” Deuce dug around in his pockets for said list.

“Ring up two cans of tuna while you're at it!” Grim called loudly.

“No, Grim! We're not here for tuna!” Deuce turned to Grim, quickly passing the list to Mr. S.

‘How quaint, it’s like we’re a family out shopping with a somewhat bratty child. I’m so teasing Deuce about this.’ I nudged Deuce, “as parents we have to be firm, huh dad?”

Deuce looks to me, then to Grim, then back to me and lets out a flustered “huuh?”

Mr. S, still reading the list comments. “What's this? Cream and eggs and... Quite the sacchariferous list! I'll get everything for you.”

“Whoa... He really does stock that stuff, huh?” Deuce says as we watched Mr. S produce the items seemingly out of nowhere.

As Mr. S showcased the variety of items, more often than not Deuce would pick the least expensive option, while I didn’t understand the currency rate of thaumarks, I focused on things like the fat percentage in the cream and milk, and the size and color of the eggs. Together we brought the price to a sensible number and secured the proper ingredients.

“Here you go. It's pretty heavy… Are you sure you can carry this? Luckily for you, our 1/100th size flying saucers are 30% off today. Perfect for carrying groceries!” Mr. S juggled the flying saucer one handed in an attempt to push more sales.

“Ooh, lemme see! That sounds awesome!” Grim completely bought into the idea.

I cover Grim’s eyes and pick him up like a football, “oh yeah Grim like you’ll be in the kitchen cooking, you don’t need it, and I’m not buying it for you.”

“We're fine, thank you. Let's go, guys.” Deuce turned, going to open the door for Grim and I again, but in his struggle I relieved him from one of his bags, still holding Grim.

“Myah! I didn't realize today was National No Fun Allowed Day!” Grim crossed his arms and pouted.

Mr. S waved from his counter, “very well. Then until next time, my little imps. Do come again! Ciao!”

☆ MAINSTREET ☆

“That store was amazing.” Deuce said looking up and reminiscing on the fantastical shop.

“Deuce you’re such a good bargain hunter, I need to learn your tricks if I want to have any money leftover to save.” I smile at Deuce.

Grim agrees.“Yeah, and you're amazingly cheap.”

“Who are you calling cheap?! Hmph.” Deuce looks away from Grim and notices the bag I’m holding is sagging. “Thorn, looks like you got the bag with all the cans. That must be heavy. Let me take that one. I've got a little trick for carrying heavy bags”.

‘That was very sweet of Deuce, it’s not like I’m struggling to carry the bag, but he looks so earnest to carry it, might as well.’ I pass the bag over to Deuce and thank him.

“Yeah. My mom always used to stock up at sales, and the bags would get ridiculously heavy. I was the only man in the house, so I got to do all the heavy lifting, and- Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to monopolize the conversation.” Deuce sure does get flustered easily, I hadn’t even said anything.

I fill in the awkward silence with a joke. “You see me as a mom then? Haha, it’s wonderful that you stepped up and liked providing and helping your family Deuce. Not everyone does that, realizes it, or sees a benefit in helping their shared community.”

“No, it wasn't like that at all. The truth is, I- Owww!” Turning the corner, another set of students had crashed into Deuce.

“Myah! The eggs!” Grim put his two paws on his head in alarm.

“T-the carton of eggs is totally smashed! And now the bag's dripping egg goo everywhere.” Deuce watched in horror as the bottom of the bag darken.

I place my hands on Deuce’s shoulder’s until he looks up at me. “It’s probably salvageable since Trey was going to use the eggs right away, we can always drop off the rest and get more. It’s not like their spilt milk.”

The egg buster spoke. “Ouch! Why don't you watch where you're- Hey! You're the jerks who broke the egg yolk on my carbonara!”

“I've had about enough of you punks. You need to learn your place!” Delinquent B shouted out, helping delinquent A stand.

Oh goody, it’s the return of Delinquents A and B or as they will now be known as the right and left nut.

Deuce was taking none of their guff. “......You're the ones who darted out at us from around a corner! And you picked a fight with us at lunch over an egg that you were still totally able to eat! And now you've destroyed six of OUR eggs!”

“Yeah! He's right!” Grim glared at the offenders.

“So what? You sayin' that was our fault?” Delinquent A smirked.

“Obviously numbnuts.” I roll my eyes, not this again.

“I am. Please reimburse us for the eggs. And then apologize to the chickens.” Deuce said firmly.

“Ooh, look who's got his big boy pants on. You sure are makin' a big deal outta some stupid eggs”. Delinquent B mocked.

“What?” Deuce asked.

“They haven't even touched the ground, so they're still edible. Quit whinin'.” Delinquent A pointed at the exposed carton.

“You should thank us for savin' ya the trouble of crackin' 'em!” Delinquent B laughed, causing delinquent A to join in.

“That ain't funny.” Deuce said, his voice darkening.

“Huh?” The numbnuts looked confused at the beginning of Deuce tweaking out.

“I said, THAT AIN'T FUNNY. You don't get to call my eggs stupid. You don't get to call ANY eggs stupid! Those eggs may not have gotten to be chicks, but they were gonna make some amazing tarts! Do you get it yet? DO YOU?!’ Deuce got aggressively in their faces, startling the two fools.

“What is with this guy all of a sudden?!” They shrieked.

“You owe me six eggs. If ya ain't gonna pay me for em, then you're gettin' a bruise for each one!” Deuce cracked his knuckles, not as a threat, but as a promise.

“Are you serious right now?!” Delinquent A took a step back, yet trying to stand his ground.

“You’re absolutely right, they are still edible.” Grim and Deuce stare at me slack jawed in disbelief.

I walk over to Deuce’s bag and scoop out a portion of egg, as the nuts start laughing again at the absurdity of it all, I launch the egg goo and get a bullseye into Delinquent A’s big mouth. The tension momentarily dispersers as the left nut barfs (cause he ain’t right) and the right nut helps him through the trauma. All the while Deuce, Grim and I are laughing so hard we practically have tears in our eyes. Once everyone settles down, left nut wiping away his chin enraged, I call out, “how many times must we teach you this lesson old man?”

“Buckle up, jerks” Deuce says as a fight breaks out.

Just as last time, the fight is very one-sided and Deuce and Grim quickly best them in combat.

“This guy's outta his mind!” Delinquent A scrambles on the ground in terror.

Delinquent B starts legging it. “Bwah! L-let's get outta here!”

Deuce yells at them in triumph. “Next time you eat an egg, you better apologize a hundred times, you buncha chumps!”

“Whoooooa…” Grim is astounded at delinquent Deuce’s appearance.

Deuce is panting heavily, hands on his knees until he suddenly makes a pained noise.

“What's wrong?” Grim stares.

“I did it again, didn't I...? ARGH! I was dead-set on becoming an honor student this time, too!” Deuce looks up abruptly, pulling his hair.

I get Deuce’s attention. “Deuce. You’re a good person. That’s why you fought and felt regret afterwards, we weren’t left with many options and you acted accordingly, but I’d like to add, what shallow concept do you have of what an honor student should be like?”

“Huh?” Grim cock’s his head to the side still staring at Deuce.

Deuce runs his hands through his hair and elaborates. “When I was in middle school, I was pretty wild. I cut school all the time and got in fights. I called my teachers names, hung out with bullies, bleached my hair… I blasted around tight curves on my Magic Wheel… I'd show off my magic to kids who couldn't use it yet... I was a total punk.”

“So you were only a little more annoying than you are now?” Grim said nonchalantly.

I add on, “Grims right. Also, it was middle school, I can assure you it’s not that deep.”

‘The wild stories I could tell you about my middle school days… Not that far off from Deuce… Now I get anxious making phone calls… I wish I was ‘youthful’ again.’ I think to myself.

Deuce makes eye contact with me, still looking disheveled. “No, Thorn you don’t understand! One night, I saw my mom talking on the phone to my grandma. She was trying to hide from me, but I saw her, and I could tell she was in tears. She was saying how she must have been a horrible mom, and that maybe she never should have tried to raise me by herself. That had nothin' to do with it! She hadn't done anything wrong. It was all me. When the carriage came to take me to Night Raven College, she was so happy for me. I decided then and there that this time, I wouldn't do anything to make her cry. This time, I'd become an honor student - someone she could be proud of. And I already messed it all up!”

“I mean, did ya, though? Is putting up with jerks what honor students do?” Grim said.

“Huh...?” Deuce paused his spiraling thoughts.

“Even I, Grim the Magnanimous, was ready to pound those losers into tuna paste! You just got to 'em first.” Grim said, miming punching those nuts again.

“Is your mom really going to hold this against you though? You must have come so far since middle school, and slipping up doesn’t mean your progress was lost or all for naught. It’s a part of the process of bettering yourself. And who’s going to find out about this anyways? You think they’ll tell on us about what happened? That whole incident is just sad, pitiful and embarrassing for them. And if you do tell your mom, I’m sure she’d laugh about it and be understanding.” I watch as Deuce turns to me, a ghost of a smile, so I continue.

“I made that guy semi-eat egg yolks and barf, haha, if you’re bad I’m bad too. What separates us, the non-delinquents, from delinquents, is that we do not instigate, or intentionally go out of our way to stir up trouble just to hurt others for our own satisfactions. I know this is our second round with those guys, but these beatdowns could be making them think twice before they try tormenting someone else, and ultimately they might stop, afraid they'll run into more people like us. What’s wrong with an honor student defending himself and others? There’s no honor in being a doormat or virtue in suffering.”

Deuce, finally standing tall, smiles. “You guys…Heh heh... I guess you're right!”

Once the sweet moment has passed I speak once more. “Also this has been bugging me for a while now, without getting into too much detail, the eggs we eat are not the ones that develop into chicks… I bet you think all cows regardless of gender have udders and brown ones produce chocolate milk too. City people are so interesting.”

“WHAAAAT??! Are you serious?” It was tough to say if Deuce was in disbelief over those statements not being true, or that I thought he thought they were. I’m going with the former.

☆ KITCHEN ☆

“Ah, you're finally back! Took ya long enough.” Ace grumbled, throwing down his dirty dishrag on the counter.

Trey ushers us back to the kitchen with, “let's get this tart-y started!”

We made great headway whisking the new ingredients, and we had just enough non damaged eggs. Eventually all the tart shells were filled.

“Okay, now we just sprinkle on a little powdered sugar, and…” Trey tapped the container gently to get an even coating.

“...Finished!” Ace and Grim cheered in victory, the chestnut tarts had been defeated in standards acceptable for a knight, and for a king.

“..Fin..ished..” Deuce lacklusterly said.

Ace nudged my side and whispered, “did something happen to him while you were shopping?”

As we watched Deuce in his own dazed little world I whispered back, “he’s fine, lets just let him come to his senses in his own time.”

“For sixteen years, I was so sure…” Deuce brokenly muttered.

Already bored of Deuce’s mumblings, Ace looked away from Deuce and said, “yeah, whatever. I'm pretty beat. Making tarts sure takes it outta you.”

“Hey fam! You look wrecked. Are the tarts done? Ooh, those look sooo cute!
Lemme snap a quick pic for Magicam!” A series of fanatic clicks followed Cater's arrival.

“What, NOW you decide to show up?” Ace said.

“I just came to see how hard my little newbs were working.” Cater smiled with a shrug.

“It's tough work if you're not used to it. But there's no better cure for the ails of fatigue than something sweet from the oven! Help yourself to some of this tart!” Trey revealed a large freshly powdered-sugared tart for all of us to sample.

The trio cheered, and grabbed their utensils.

“Pretty funny how you managed to show right when it was ready to eat, Cater.” Ace shot Cater a knowing look.

“Heh heh. Someone's gotta be the official taster!” Cater picked up a fork.

“Mmmm... That smells so good...Glossy chestnuts on top, fluffy cream below... I can't wait another second, I'm going in!” With that, Grim took a big piece out of his tart and chomped.

“Oh, dang…” Ace slowly pulled the fork out of his mouth.

“Yuuum! Liked and subscriiibed!” Cater said as he took another photo.

“This is like something from a fancy bakery.” Deuce looked up in admiration.

“I’ve never had a chestnut tart before, but the savory flavor and lightness of it is soooo good!” I said, taking another piece.

“Rich in flavor, yet not too sweet... It's like chestnuts are dancing across my tongue!” Grim drooled.

“Is that... a good thing?” Trey asked.

Cater looked up from his phone, “oh, Trey! You gotta do the thing.”

“The thing? Oh... That.” Recognition crossing Trey’s face.

“Uh, wanna fill me in here?” Ace asked.

“What's everyone's favorite food?” Trey took out his magical fountain pen.

Ace pointed to himself. ‘Me? Probably cherry pie. Or hamburgers.”

Grim was next, practically flying out of his seat. “Canned tuna's at the top of my list. Then maybe cheese omelets, roast meat, pudding…”

‘If I had to pick, I guess I'd say... omelet rice?” Deuce looked off in thought.

Cater chimed in, “I like a nice lamb chop with diablo sauce.”

Soon all eyes fell to me, awaiting my response. “Uhh, I’m not sure, I like a lot of things.” I picked up my fork and ate another piece of tart, deciding that finishing the tart was the best course of action. It’s not like I had lied really, but I’ve never had chestnut paste before so why change it to a familiar flavor, this experience is fun as it is.

“All right, you've got it... Let's "Doodle Suit"!” Trey waved his pen.

“Huh? What does that mean?” Deuce asked.

“Take another bite of your tart and see.” Trey said mischievously.

Ace did. “Huh? How- Now it tastes like cherry pie!”

Grim munched with much gusto. “It's just like canned tuna! *munch* *munch* Now it tastes like a cheese omelet! And grilled meat! *munch* *munch* And pudding!”

Setting my tart down, I look at Trey with amusement. “Trey, you wouldn't happen to own a chocolate factory, would you?”

“Neat trick, eh? That's gotta be a hit when Trey's having tea with the ladies.” Cater nudged Trey and winked, Trey rolled his eyes.

“It's very impressive. Is changing flavors your signature spell, Trey?” Deuce set his fork down, finished eating his decadent labor.

“Technically, it's "overwriting characteristics." I can change taste, color, smell, whatever. It only lasts for a little while. But it is kinda like covering up the real thing hence, "doodle." Trey finished.

“If I had magic like that, I could be eatin' canned tuna every meal of every day!
That's way better than Riddle's stupid collar magic!” Grim grumbled at the end.

“Oh, that's in a whole other league. His signature spell is a weapon. Mine's just childish prestidigitation. Speaking of Riddle - it's too late to give him these now. Let's call it a day and do it tomorrow. Don't forget that tomorrow's the unbirthday party. You don't want to be late.” Trey began to usher us out of the kitchen.

Ace walked up to me, “Thorn, can I crash with you again? It doesn't sound like I'll be allowed back in my own dorm tonight.”

“Again, seriously?” Cater teased Ace.

Deuce leaned his head forward to see Ace on the other side of me. “It isn't right to keep mooching off of Thorn, Ace.”

“Yeah, it ain't! If you wanna stay tonight, you gotta pay for the privilege! Ten cans of tuna!” Grim demanded fiercely, jumping into my arms.

“I think we’d do better with charging thaumarks.” I ‘joked’ looking at Ace.

“What?! Guess I'm sleeping outside, then.” Ace half-dramatically threw up his hands.

Over the threshold, Trey stopped us. “Why don't you go and stay at Thorn's dorm too, Deuce, so you can keep an eye on him? As vice housewarden, I can issue you a sleepover pass.” Trey had already pulled out two slips of paper and began writing.

“That's our Trey, always spoiling the newbs. What fun for you. Ooh, maybe I'll come too! What do you say, Thorn?” Cater smiled ever-so sweetly at me, eyes sparkling.

Before I could agree to Cater’s request, Trey answered for me, “no pass for you.”

Cater slumped forward ever so slightly. “Aww. Sad trumpet... Womp womp wooomp.”

“Sorry to dump them all on you, Thorn. At least it's just for tonight.” Trey said sympathetically.

“That’s neither here nor there.” I gave Trey a polite smile.

“Tomorrow's the unbirthday party. Finally, I'm gonna get rid of this stupid collar! Just you wait, Riddle!” Ace proudly declared, fiddling with his necklace.

☆ RAMSHACKLE DORM ☆

Pushing the stiff door, I flick the dim lights of ramshackle. “Since Ace has so graciously offered to sleep outside, you can sleep on the couch if you’d like Deuce.”

“You can’t be serious? Aren't there other rooms?” Ace rushes up the stairs before I can say anything, a disgruntled Grim following suit.

“What do you think of ramshackle Deuce? Does it live up to its reputation?”

Deuce dumbly nods, in a state of shock on the conditions his friend was so generously given to live in. “Ah! Sorry! No offense Thorn! I’m sure it's very homey and… Rustic is what Trey-senpai called it?”

Freeing Deuce from his misery I tell him it's of no mind, it’s not like this is really my home anyways. As I guide Deuce to set his belongings by the couch, we hear Grim and Ace shouting and the tell tale signs of furniture moving. He clocks the novel on the counter. “‘Rose in the Queendom of Roses’?”

“I’ve been trying to study, or rather immerse myself, in the differences between our worlds, I haven’t finished yet.”

“It’s a very popular children’s book where I’m from, based on real events from the Red Queen herself.”

Deuce and I awkwardly sat for a few moments until Ace came bounding over. “Put on your jammies you two so this sleepover can start, I brought playing cards.” As he said this, he pulled the deck out of his pullover pocket.

Ace was wearing a large red hoodie with a graphic of the playing card soldiers from Alice across his chest, and loose black sweatpants.

As Deuce searched his bag for his pajamas, Grim called me out. “My henchman doesn’t wear pajamas.”

I gave Grim a blank stare. “Neither do you.”

“Fwnya? I, the great Grim haven’t the need for clothes to hold me back!”
Deuce looked up apprehensively. “...You sleep naked?”

“No! I wear the ceremonial robes. I don’t own anything else and probably can’t afford it anyways.” As Deuce makes his way to the bathroom to change, I go upstairs to my shared bedroom to find the robes.

Deuce and I bump into one another heading down the stairs. Deuce is wearing a long black lounge shirt with various sized pocket watch pattern, and long black pants with a white rabbit design on his upper left hip. Turning to the living room, Ace and Grim have set up makeshift seats around the table to play cards.

Ace shuffled the deck. “Lets play old maid, you dumbo’s should be able to manage that.”

Grim balked “Mrrya?! I thought you said we were gonna play cards! Not clean!”

After a painful few minutes of trying to explain the rules to Grim, and a practice round, we talked about this and that.

“I’m from the Queendom of Roses, same as Ace, but specifically a small town called Clock Town. There’s clocks and clock shops everywheres, expertly crafted, anything you can think of has the potential to be a clock.” Deuce shifted his cards. “And of course there’s the Rabbit National Park, with a huge rose-hedge maze and rabbit shaped topiaries–”

“Mr. Tour guide over here.” Ace points with his thumb at Deuce snickering.

Grim makes a shocked face and looks back and forth at the others. He got the old maid again. Grim has zero poker face or the ability to lie convincingly. Of course once called out for the third time Grim threw a fit, and his cards.

"Let's play UNO instead." I lightly chuckle at Grim's frustration. After quickly explaining the rules and modifying UNO to suit a regular playing deck, we fell into story time again.

“What does it look like where you’re from Thorn?” Ace asked casually, picking up Grim’s cards to reshuffle the deck.

I was a bit taken off guard. What would I say? In comparison to Ace and Deuce, anyone really, it was sinfully boring. The sights were beautiful, but there really wasn’t anyone there or anything to do. Once Grim had settled down, he looked thoughtful.

“Well I lived in a forestry type of place, there were colorful mountains, shimmering creeks, various wildlife, no reception, and nobody around. Ramshackle reminds me of my house in a lot of ways, that’s probably why I’m able to get along, haha. There wasn’t much to do, take in the sights, exercise, drive around, it was picturesque, but I always had a project or a hobby to do so I wasn’t bored... I don’t think I was lonely… I’ve always been self-reliant and positive… I kinda miss my family…” I stopped talking. How did I go from describing where I’m from to talking about myself?

I think my pause must have been taken for sadness as Deuce elbowed Ace, he rolled his eyes and changed the subject. “Hey Thorn, win this next round and you could be the proud new owner of a set of lightly used pajamas.”

“This isn’t strip poker.” I deadpan, Deuce spitting out imaginary water in shock.

Ace looks startled as he clarifies, “!? Not what I meant! I mean if you win this next round I’ll give you a pair, a pair I never wore.”

“Sure, okay.” I laugh, “one can never have enough clothes.”

Before the next round begins Grim pipes up, “I don’t remember where I’m from… Or if I had a family… I just know that I will become a sorcerer extraordinaire.”

I gesture for Grimmy to sit in my lap as we play the next round. After I won, I offered to clean up as everyone else did their sleep routine. Out of curiosity, I looked at Ace’s disregarded hand. He had a winning hand; he could have won our makeshift UNO a few rounds ago, but he gave me the opportunity to win. I smiled fondly to myself. I’ll keep Ace’s secret. But I wasn’t upset at them asking me questions about my life, I was just keeping busy not thinking about it.

We decided to bring some furniture and mattresses in order to camp out in the living room together like a real sleepover. Soon we started to gossip, Grim fell asleep first however.

“You know Ace, I’m actually really proud of you for standing up to Riddle. Seeing those Heartslabyul students in the cafeteria cower… How Trey turns a blind eye, how long do they think they have when people are that frightened? There’s no one on the people’s side, there’s going to be a tipping point, a coup if we’re dramatic enough, but change has to start with someone, and I think it’s you Ace.”

Ace looked surprised, but quickly smiled and started boasting. “Of course! While others may be content with obeying that tyrant’s every nonsensical whim, there has got to be some give! Some warnings! Or at least not losing your magic weeks on end for accidents.”

Deuce nodded solemnly, although he didn’t agree with the method. “Riddle-senpai isn’t that bad… Not if you follow the rules at least.”

“But that’s just the thing Deuce, people have to want to obey on their own accord not because they’re afraid of what happens if they don’t, consequences are a part of life of course, and someone is always going to want to push the envelope, but the punishment has to make sense for the crime. If all roads lead to the same destination, then it won’t matter what you do, so why care? To live with that type of stress… To only feel safe, no probably never feeling safe even if you follow all the rules, no one can live like that.” I layed down thinking about Riddle. About how needlessly strict his life must have been, how he must have been sad and alone, maybe even afraid of his parents just for having wants and desires.

Soon soft snores filled the room, still feeling upset about Riddle and what’s to come I decided to read ‘Rose in the Queendom of Roses’ until I felt better, or at least tired.

‘The Trial’

‘All the residents in wonderland had been summoned, each judderwhacky, and tomnimble filled the stans, impatiently and boisterously awaiting the trial of the century. Someone had defied and disrespected the Queen of Hearts.’

‘How do you pleeeeeadddd? Hmmmmmmmmmmmm?’ A cerulean caterpillar demanded, puffing smoke rings out with each syllable.’

‘Well not guilty. I wasn’t aware of the rules.’ The accused started.’

‘AHA! So you do admit to breaking the rules! Not being ‘aware’ of the rules isn’t a viable excuse! You should have familiarized yourself with them as soon as you entered this domain.’ Rose shouted.’

‘How could I break something intentionally that I’m unaware of? You’re impractical and nonsensical.’ The accused started again, but the young future queen threw a fit and ordered everyone to capture the miscreant or it would be off with everyone’s head!

…
…
….

☆ HEARTSLABYUL DORM LOUNGE ☆

(Not so long after the quartet left for their sleepover.) The Heartslabyul dorm lounge was spacious as it was scatterbrained. Scarlet rose printed walls housed off center golden framed playing cards, most of which shifted and fluttered about, pocket watches dangled at random with incorrect times. The dim glow from a few lit lights, as well as the golden heart fireplace illuminated Trey and Cater, both of whom were dressed in their dorm attire despite the late hour. Both wore white slacks belted with a yellow and black striped sash with mismatched blazers: a black and red split heart motif ran from the collar to the chest, a white rose lapel gave the illusion of dripping red paint, the left arm was black while the right was white and black diamond patterned, both had red cuffs. And that’s where the similarities end, Cater wore a buttoned up scarlet vest, whereas Trey wore a black open vest and a white fedora with a yellow and black sash.

“Trey! Cater! You're finally back! We've been looking everywhere for you!” An NPC Heartslabyul student desperately cried out, rushing towards the duo frantically.

“What happened?” Trey’s eyes widened as he placed his hands on the student’s shoulder in order to steady him.

“Ten dorm members were caught violating rule 256… "No drinking honey-sweetened lemonade after 8 p.m." Housewarden Riddle collared them all!” The NPC’s eyes started to mist over in his adrenaline filled panting.

Trey and Cater remained silent, unsurprised by Riddle’s effect on their fellow dormmate, and waited for the distressed student to continue.

“I can't take it anymore! I can't live like this! Everything we do violates some insane rule! I want to transfer to another dorm... *Sob*” The dam had finally bursted, the NPC crumbled as he sobbed into his hands.

Trey calmly reassured the student. “It'll be okay. We'll go talk to the housewarden. You go back to your room.”

As the broken NPC sniffled his way back to his quarters, Cater sighed. “Guess I’d better go make some tea or something, as a show of deference to the Queen.”

“Thanks, Cater. Oh, but make sure it's herbal tea, not black. You know what rule 153 says about drinking tea at night.” Trey turned back to his papers, sorting through the dorm’s problems issued by students, mainly appeals of Riddle’s collaring.

“...Yeaaah, sure. Of course.” Cater tiredly muttered, turning his back on Trey in order to fetch the Queen’s tea.

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

Chapter Text

A Study In Scarlet Tyrants

In A World Of My Own

Part 7

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

“Thorn, wake up. The unbirthday party is today. If we're late, well, you know... “ Deuce shook me awake, I glanced at the book on my nightstand.

“Oh..Yeah, that’s today isn’t it?” I sleepily ask.

Enthusiastic knocks in the rhythm of a song I don’t know ring out. “Hmm? It sounds like you have a visitor.” Deuce says, walking downstairs.

By the time I come down, Cater is in the lounge and he greets us. “Good mooorning! Did you all enjoy your sleepover? Did you bond over pillow fights and card games?”

Ace stretched as he entered the lounge area. “Oh, good morning, Cater. We did play some cards, yeah. But only Old Maid, 'cause that was the only one Grim knew how to play.”

“And I still got the old maid every time, dang it!” Grim frowned.

“Let's just say Grim doesn't have a very good poker face.” Deuce said looking away from the pouting monster.

Doing my best impression, I greet Cater. “Good morning starshine. The Earth says ‘hello!” I received a few odd looks.

Cater chuckled at that, “well, you should get one of the tarts we made yesterday and go apologize to Riddle. And you should probably hurry, because after the trouble yesterday, we're a little short-handed.”

“What does that mean?” Ace asked.

“Don't worry. I've totes got it under control. Anyway, off to the party we go!” Cater said, hightailing it out of ramshackle.

☆ HEARTSLABYUL DORM ☆

Walking around Heartslabyul, to the rose maze I assumed, Ace went through his plan once more. “All right, so I'll hand over the tart and say I'm sorry, then-”

“Hey, it's about time I got back! Good to see me!” Cater, wearing his Heartslabyul’s dorm uniform, called out emerging from the entryway.

“And me! Looking good as always, me!” The Cater that had accompanied us, wearing nrc dorm uniform smiled.

“Bwuh?!” Everyone was completely dumbfounded, multiple Caters?!

“Th-there're two Caters?!” Deuce stuttered in shock,

“Are you guys identical twins?!” Ace asked, looking back and forth between the duo.

“Nope. Don't have any brothers. What I DO have is my signature spell, Split Card. It lets me make magic duplicates of myself.” Cater A (the Cater that had traveled with us) said, leaning his arm on Cater B’s shoulder.

“This must be how Cater kept coming after we beat him over and over again yesterday…” Deuce quietly mused to himself.

“Welcome home, daaarlings.” Another Cater joined the get together. Cater C wore a white science lab coat with bright red goggles around his neck.

“Good to see you, Thorn!” Cater D called from behind us, he wore his ceremonial robes.

‘Perhaps the Cater I saw on orientation was a clone? Damn not even his clones wanna do his dirty work, I’ve seen this trope before, I hope there’s no uprising side plotline.’ I thought, staring at all the Cater's cautiously poking Cater D.

“You're late! I was worried sick!” Cater B nagged lightly.

“Bwah! There're more of them?” Ace rubbed his eyes.

Cater B lost his frown and spoke with a teasing smile. “J-S-Y-K, I'm actually the real Cater. Making these duplicates is suuuper exhausting, so I can't maintain them for long. Anyway, if we're late, heads will roll. And since we're several people short, we'll need your help. But when this is over, I promise I'll take you straight to Riddle.”

“What, MORE roses?” Grim groaned, observing the cans of paint and dripping roses.

Ace groaned too at the sight of the very white roses. “And here we go again!”

“Get the lead out, peeps! We need to get started!” Cater B, the original flavor Cater said, doing a show of shaking off the laziness.

“We’re just your sugared marshmallow lackeys huh? Big peep?” I joke, Cater entertains my ramblings with a small laugh and hands me a paintbrush.

Actually painting the roses this time, I must admit it was nice. Painting the roses had a good feel to them, and they never tore and remained soft. It’d be more enjoyable if we weren’t on a time crunch with high stakes on the line though. Man these guys don’t know just how high the stakes are going to progress. Everyone was giving it their all, Grim and I were a bit slow but no one said anything.

“*pant* Well this is going better than before.” Deuce’s concentration to use magic caused him to sweat, but he was right, all of his roses were turning red rather than blue.

“Looking good!” Original flavor Cater said, his phone buzzed. “Ooh, it's almost time! Okay, all you sexy body doubles, that's a wrap!”

“Aye-aye Cay-Cay!” All his clones saluted at once.

☆ HEARTSLABYUL DORM - TEA GARDEN ☆

Venturing in a new direction, Cater led us to a new section of the maze, where a tea party that looked like it came straight out of Wonderland greeted us. Multiple white clothed round tables were filled with unique and perplexing trinkets, while there were traditional foods one could recognize for a tea party such as teapots, and finger foods, some had random playing cards scattered throughout, multiple teacups stacked with roses growing out of them, or a tower of an assortment of Victorian hats. Underneath the tables and red and black checked chairs were maroon rugs, one table had a pile of thick books where a tiny stool rested at the top. There were nonsensical directions and sighs, a pink flamingo (I remain unsure if the creature is real or a garden one), and colorful streamers and lanterns hung in the air. But the most eye-catching was a long white table that oversaw the others with a gigantic ornate velvet heart shaped throne in the center (the way the chairs were set up, you’d think it was the last supper.) This table was filled with even more delicacies and fineries.

No longer enchanted by the spread, I noticed everyone stood straight and rigid, not unlike soldiers. Once Riddle had entered our field of view, an npc Heartslabyul student decreed, “all hail our leader, the red sovereign himself... Housewarden Riddle!” Every member of Heartslabyul quickly added, “we salute you, Housewarden Riddle!”

Riddle made a great show of slowly approaching the tea party and taking the time to properly assess the scene. “Hm. The garden roses are red, the tablecloths are white... This seems a proper unbirthday indeed. Is there a dormouse asleep in the teapot, as there should be?” Riddle looked to his vice housewarden.

“Of course. And should it become necessary, we've also prepared the jam to spread on his nose.” Trey gestured with his eyes to the raspberry jam next to the white rotund teapot.

“Very good.” Riddle nodded.

“Myah! Those are some fancy duds!” Grim’s eyes shining at Riddle’s pristine dorm leader outfit.

“With Riddle’s off center golden crown and gallant flowing black and red cape, it’s hard to remember that he isn’t actually a prince.” I remark.

“These are Heartslabyul dorm clothes. Aren't they fierce? At the forefront of fashion, and they look great on Magicam.” One of the Cater’s supplied.

Riddle’s outfit followed the same black and red heart motif collar, half red dripping white rose, and black and yellow striped belt, only his had a red ribbon attached. His black and red tie was secured with a golden crown cravat, his white trench coat’s right side was adorned with various knickknacks and his coat flared at the bottom with a two toned red heart pattern making for a medium length train in the back. He wore long black heeled boots that went well above his knees with red and gold detailings with the split hearts at the tops of the boots, and thick long black gloves to complete the regal ensemble.

Original flavor Cater explained, “one of the Queen's rules mandates formal dress on party days. As a show of kindness from a beloved mentor, I'll help coordinate your outfits.” With the point of his fountain pen, Adeuce were now wearing their respective Heartslabyul uniforms.

“Whoa!” Deuce looked down at his new threads.

“Lookin' sharp!” Ace said with a finger gun.

“Myah! So cool!” Grim said in awe at the duo’s transformation.

“Very becoming,” I said smiling at the duo, the only difference in their outfit being the color of their vest; red for Ace and black for Deuce. I won’t lie, I wish I had an outfit to change into that would suit the occasion rather than thugging it out with rando worn in hand me downs.

“Now, let's tear this party up! And don't forget to give Riddle the tart.” Cater motioned towards Riddle who had just sat down, making his way over.

“Before we begin the croquet tournament, let us make a toast. Does everyone have their teacup?” Riddle paused for a moment until all teacups were raised. “On this most significantly unauspicious of days, I bid all in attendance... a very merry unbirthday!” Riddle announced, miming cheering his cup with another person.

“To a very merry unbirthday!” Heartslabyul rang out, cheering their cup.

Everyone resumed their seated position, Cater called out, “Ace, this is your chance!”

Ace rose from his chair and approached Riddle. “Right... Uh, housewarden, sir…”

Riddle peered up from his sip of tea, setting the teacup down he indifferently responded, “ah, it's you. The tart thief.”

“Yeah, so, I wanted to apologize for eating that tart. We made you a new tart to replace it.” Ace presented said tart in front of Riddle with his hand outstretched, waiting for his Housewarden to accept.

“Hmm? And what kind of tart is it?” Riddle asked, eyeing Ace and the offering.

Ace smiled in his typical fashion, “I'm so glad you asked! It's a chestnut tart, and I swear, we weren't stingy with the chestnuts.”

“A CHESTNUT tart?!” Riddle yelled. The festivities were instantly dropped, everyone watched silently as the scene unfolded.

“What?!” Ace blurted out in alarm.

“The Queen of Hearts's rule 562: "One must never bring a chestnut tart to an unbirthday tea party." This is an utterly flagrant rule violation! Do you understand what you've done?! You've ruined an otherwise perfect unbirthday!” Riddle fumed.

“Rule 562...?!” Deuce gapped. Just how many rules would Mr. Honor student have to hold himself too?

“How many of these rules are there?!” I couldn't help but ask.

Riddle cleared his throat. “There are 810 rules in all, and as a housewarden, I can of course recite each and every one of them.”

Cater leaned closer to his vice housewarden and whispered. “(Wow, T-I-L... This could be bad. Trey, were you aware of this?)”

“(I was only able to memorize the first 350 or so. Well, we really botched this one. Big-time.)” Trey whispered back, sweating.

Riddle continued. “As housewarden of a dorm established to honor the Queen of Hearts's rigor, I cannot ignore this. Destroy the offending tart immediately! Then throw these rulebreakers out of the dorm!”

“Whoa, hold up! Is that one of your rules too?!” Ace questioned, stunned that his Housewarden would say such a thing.

I was a bit surprised too. ‘Ace brings up a good point. Destroying the offender seems very personal, at what point is Riddle separate from the rules?’

Grim butted in. “Yeah! If you want the tart gone, let me eat it!”

Trey quickly took accountability. “Housewarden, allow me to apologize. I was the one who suggested making a chestnut tart.”

Cater also stepped up alongside Trey. “I was a part of that too. We had no idea there was a rule about it!”

“The making of the tart is not the issue. The issue is bringing it HERE. Today. THAT is the transgression!” Riddle sternly said.

“Riddle.” I started, “the rules, or perhaps in this case laws, are up for interpretation. Although this tart may be present it was offered, not served, and not placed upon the table. Therefore, it is possible that it can just as easily be taken away and there is no need for you to take your grievances out on people.”

Riddle lashed out, “are you calling me foolish?!”

Cater quickly intervened. “Everyone, stop! Don't dig this hole any deeper! And Riddle, please try to remember that these are new students who've only been here a few days!”

Ace crossed his arms, anger growing. “Nah, bro. I've got a shovel and I am DIGGING. Throwing away a tart to obey some insane rule is about as foolish as it gets.”

Deuce stood with Ace. “I agree with Ace and Thorn. Of course, I understand that rules do need to be followed, but… This is going much too far.”

Riddle scoffed. “Are you attempting to debate me? Bold move. But I'll bite. By breaking even the smallest rule, you are throwing wide the gate to anarchy.”

“Everyone, I know you're afraid of getting your magic sealed away, but you know this is insane, right?” Ace called out, looking at his fellow dormmates.

Everyone looked acutely uncomfortable now having the spotlight on them. One npc shakily answered, afraid under the Housewarden’s gaze. “N-no, we, uh…”

“Well? Isn't it?” Housewarden Riddle pressed nonchalantly.

“Far from it, Housewarden Riddle, sir! “ The npc said.

“We trust in your judgment, sir!” Another one added for good measure.

Grim growled at the crowd and under his breath said “you little…”

Ace called them out. “You spineless, fair-weather cowards…”

“In the year since I became housewarden, not a single student from Heartslabyul House has dropped out or been held back a year. We are the only house that can boast such a feat. Furthermore, of everyone in this dorm, I have the best academic standing. Hence, I am the most correct! If you would simply obey me without question, we wouldn't need to contend so.” Riddle proclaimed.

“Listen, we-!” Deuce tried to cut in, but Riddle interrupted, “it's not off with their heads because *I* want to do that. I do it because rules must never be broken.”

‘What an assortment of twisted knots Riddle is… And he just revealed that he is suffering under his own strictness too.’ I attempted to reason with Riddle. “What do you think will happen if you do not follow the rules to a ‘T’? What do you think you’re protecting everyone else from?”

Riddle became quiet. Trey glanced at Riddle, regret gracing his features.

Riddle returned after a beat. “If you will not obey me, then I will have all of your heads!”

“Okay, let's all say, "Yes, Housewarden Riddle." Cater forced a smile, keeping his worries at bay.

Deuce looked at the trio for a while until he finally answered. “... I can't.”

“I refuse. Keeping quiet when there is disruption inside yourself is not keeping the peace, you cannot ignore a problem until it goes away.” I added.

“I don't bow to self-important tyrants!” Ace loudly said.

“What did you just call me?” Riddle glared at Ace.

Grim stepped in, pointing at Riddle. “He called you a tyrant for wantin' to destroy good food just 'cause you're throwin' a tantrum!”

Deuce didn’t like the scowls on Riddle, Ace, and Grim’s face. “Guys, I don't think we need to escalate this-”

“Off! With! Your! Heads!” Riddle shouted, magical pen pointed at the two non collared refusers.

“Bwaaaaaaah!” Grim and Deuce yelled in shock. I think the only reason I was spared is due to the fact there’s an actual law against magic users using magic on non-magic users.

“No! Not the collar again!” Grim whined as he rolled on the ground trying to pull the lock off.

“Gah! I can't get it off!” Deuce shouted, attempting to pull a part the collar from his neck.

“Trey! Cater! Eject them from the premises!” Riddle demanded.

“... Yes sir, Housewarden.” Trey and Cater said in a low monotone voice.

“Y-you're supposed to be our "mentors"!” Deuce looked between his two upperclassmen stunned.

“Sorry, but we can't disobey our housewarden!” Cater said with a tight lipped smile, ushering us out.

“Sorry, man…” Trey couldn’t even look us in the eyes.

“Oh that’s how its going to be? Bring it on!” Ace stood firm, prepared to fight physically.

“…” Trey looked tired but still raised his wand to kick us out. Given that we had no magic, it was easy for Cater and Trey to overpower us and strongman us out.

“We'll T-T-Y-L, folks.” Cater said, blocking the entrance with Trey.

“We'll try to calm Riddle down, so maybe he'll let you back in the dorm after you apologize.” Trey added.

“I will NEVER apologize! Not to that numbskull!” Ace yelled over his shoulder.

I stopped for a moment and turned back to look at Cater and Trey. “When you two end up alone, you’ll have nobody to blame but yourselves.” The trio and I continued walking out of Heartslabyul.

☆ HEARTSLABYUL DORM - TEA GARDEN ☆

“Hmph. Now, let's get this party back on track. After all, we still need to have the croquet tournament. And now we're fifteen minutes behind schedule! This is outrageous!” Riddle resumed his position as Trey poured him a fresh batch of tea.

“Yes sir, Housewarden Riddle.”

Cater stared wide eyed at Trey. “Are you really okay with this, Trey?”

Trey looked torn, “what do you expect me to do about it?”

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Chapter Text

A Study In Scarlet Tyrants

In A World Of My Own

Part 8

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“Rrrgh! I hate that little ginger megalomaniac! Does he think HE's the Queen of Hearts?” Ace seethed as we exited the hedge labyrinth.

“Banished by the housewarden from my own dorm... My dream of becoming an honor student is slipping further and further away…” Deuce said sadly, glancing down at his heart shaped choker.

“Stupid collar! It's so tight! Grrr…” Grim grumbled as he lightly pulled at it.

“You're really racking up those collars. Quite the impressive collection.” An eccentric violet streaked shaggy micro bang bowl cut head materialized in front of our path, bobbing as it spoke.

“BWAH?!” We all yelled out startled by the yellow eyed, cat eared, accessorized Che’nya.

“Myah! A ghost head!” Grim cried in alarm, hiding behind my legs.

“Oh dear. It seems I'm not all here.” Che’nya glanced back to his non visible body as his head went right side down.

“What? Er, so you do have a body, then? Who are you?” Deuce furrowed his eyebrows trying to make sense of the ‘ghost.’

I looked at Deuce. “O-M-G Deuce! You cannot just ask people if they have a body!”

The odd earning-ed catboy chuckled, Deuce apologized, “right, sorry.”

Flipping his head right side round again he spoke. “The name's Artemiy Artemiyevich Pinker. Am I a cat? Am I a purrrson? A mimsy borogove, perhaps? A mome rath with a knack for magic?”

“Uh, look, Ar... Arte... Run the name by me again?” Ace asked, confusion written all over his face.

“Heh heh. People usually just call me Che'nya. Let's just say I'm not from the other side of the looking glass.”

“This weirdo is built different.” I nodded sagely.

“You think so? I'd say by the standards here, I'm no more mad than anyone else.” Che’nya’s lips curled in kitty fashion (:3c) “Curiouser and curiouser, the Thorn Snow is kitten with.”

After the initial shock had worn off, Ace was back to his sour mood. “After the insanity that teapot tyrant put me through, I'm not in the mood for whatever this is. Just leave me alone.”

“Riddle the teapot tyrant... Heh heh. Well, I can't dismiss that perspective as wrong. He's always been quite strict.” Che’nya floated as if he was laying on his back.

“Do you know something about him?” Deuce asked, attempting to turn his head to match Che’nya’s.

“Perhaps there are things that I know, and perhaps there are things that I don't.” The non-ghostly head sing-songed.

“That's not an answer!” Grim shouted up at the smirking cat.

I cut in, attempting to not get lost in the sauce. “Sure it is, if he knows, he knows and if he doesn't, he doesn't, but how can he know if he knows if he doesn't even know what we are asking?”

The three stages of confusion turned to me, Che’nya however smiled as his face dropped closer to mine, “you remind me of that lost thing Alison, hehehe. Is there something you wish to know about Riddle?”

“Yeah, what created such a control freak?” Ace questioned, arms crossed.

Che’nya hummed. “I believe his four-eyed friend may have the answer.”

“Four-eyed friend? You mean Trey?” Deuce asked.

Che’nya nodded (at least we assumed he did) “He's known Riddle since we were all little boys. If you want to know more about Riddle, I would begin my quest there.”

Deuce put his hand to his chin. “They're childhood friends? I didn't really get that impression.”

Che’nya shrugged (possibly) “If you're so perceptive, then what are you asking me for? Buh-bye!” The mischievous floating head somersaulted upwards like a wayward balloon.

‘Damn he got us there. Oh! I wonder if he’s only transparent? If I stuck my hand in his mouth would it disappear as well?’ I thought watching the happy head.

“H-hey!” Deuce tried jumping to pull the mysterious guy back. “Ha ha ha ha...!” Che’nya laughed as his head lost visibility. He was gone (maybe?)

“I tell ya, no one makes any sense around here.” Grim sighed.

“Well, we're not going to be able to do much in the way of schoolwork with these collars on. So let's go see what Trey has to say, and then…” Deuce stopped watching Ace’s face turn red.

“If you're gonna say "apologize to Riddle," you can forget it!” He shouted.

“Someone’s been a bad-nut. Maybe we need to set up a little ambush…” I voiced.

☆ HEARTSLABYUL DORM LOUNGE ☆

Riddle sat in a smaller heart shaped chair as he dealt with another troublemaker. Despite the revolutionary’s absence, Riddle had only become more tightly wound with upholding the rules; he had become far too lenient if his subjects thought they could question his authority.

“The Queen of Hearts's rule 249: "Flamingo caretakers are to don pink attire."
It was supposed to be your turn to feed the flamingos today. Why aren't you wearing pink?” Riddle scrutinized the perpetrator standing before him.

The Heartslabyul npc scrambled for a viable excuse. “I'm sorry, Housewarden. My pink clothes were in the laundry... Please, sir, not the collar!”

“This is your second rule violation. I cannot forgive a repeated offense.” Riddle raised his pen, and with a slash called, “Off With Your Head!”

“Gaaaaaaah!” The npc wailed, the built up stress weighing on him more than the collar.

“Write me a 5,000-word apology and weed the garden for one week, and I'll remove it.” Riddle said, already flipping through a stack of hefty papers.

“*sobs* but-”

Riddle quickly looked back to his subject to deter him from becoming another Aduece. “Do you think I enjoy having to do this?! You're the one who broke the rules! As much as I would like to, I cannot ignore these infractions. It's for your own sake. Understood?” Riddle went back to organizing his materials. “Trey? Cater? Remove him from the premises.”

“...Yes, Housewarden.” They said in unison.

☆ LIBRARY ☆

Milling the library hallways, the trio and I waited to set our plan in motion. Eventually Trey had arrived, as I suspected he would. Caught up in finding the proper shelf he didn’t notice us, Deuce called out to him, “hello Trey.”

Trey spun around, “you four!’ he said, surprised.

“We figured that if we waited at the library, you'd show up to return your tart cookbook eventually.” Deuce admitted.

“We still got a problem with the way Housewarden Riddle is handling all of this.” Ace added, annoyance seeping through.

Trey looked down for a moment before facing us once more. “Yeah, I thought you might say that.”

Ace pressed the issue, stepping closer to Trey. “Come clean with us. What's your take on Riddle? Is it true you've been pandering to him since the two of you were kids?”

Trey’s eyes widened. “What?! Who told you that?”

“A guy who called himself Che’nya.” Deuce clarified.

“Che’nya... Huh. That explains it.” Trey sighed.

Grim crossed his arms looking up at the Heartslabyul vice housewarden. “What I don't get is, aren't you older than Riddle? Why haven't ya told him off already?”

“I do when I need to. I don't think the situation calls for it.” Trey answered.

Ace raised an eyebrow. “Why not?”

Trey rubbed the back of his head. “These sorts of strict rules... They're what created Riddle.”

“Huh?” Deuce uttered out.

Trey elaborated. “His parents were famous magical healers. Everyone where we're from knew their names. His mom was especially talented, and she really wanted Riddle to live up to her legacy. So, from the moment Riddle woke up to when his head hit the pillow at the end of the night… Every aspect of his life was planned, down to the minute, by the education program she made for him.”

“Sounds pretty lame.” Grim idly commented.

Trey continued in a somber tone. “What he ate, what he wore, what soap he used, who his friends were - every last detail had been predetermined for him. And to please his parents, Riddle obediently completed every task they'd laid out for him. He mastered his signature spell by age ten. He's been the top student in all of his classes. I can't even imagine how hard he must have had it.”

“So we’re just supposed to pass the buck off to his parents and accept that it's okay for Riddle to carry on like this?” I raised an eyebrow at Trey, crossing my arms. There’s so much more I want to say, but I feel as though I can’t say too much, yet.

Trey attempted to explain, “Riddle sees the enforcement of strict rules as a service to his dorm members. In his eyes, being bound by rigid guidelines - by fear - is a fast-track to personal growth. Because that's how it worked for him. And on the flip side, he sees the violation of those rules as an inexcusable offense.”

“I guess that makes sense, since rules made him who he is.” Ace huffed, simmering down.

Trey tried to explain his case once more, “look, I totally get why you see Riddle as a tyrant, and why you disapprove of his methods. But for me... I can't hold that against him, you know?”

“Myah…” Grim sighed.

“So that's why he's like that.” Deuce said plainly.

Ace was quiet for a long moment, but the air was still thick with tension. “...... All right, now I get it. It's YOUR fault Riddle's like this.”

“What?!” Deuce, Grim, and Trey said in shock.

“LET HIM COOK!” I said, hyping Ace up. I’ve been waiting for this moment.

Ace grilled Trey. “Riddle didn't get to choose his parents. But you know what his parents did to him, and you know it was wrong, right?”

“I mean, yeah…” Trey said unsure of where Ace was going with his line of questioning.

“Well, now Riddle's making the exact same mistake that his parents did. You're going easy on him because he had it rough as a kid? Don't you see where that's leading? You're letting him make a pariah out of himself!”

“......” Trey looked hurt at the confrontation.

Deuce pulled Ace’s sleeve in an attempt to reel him in seeing their senpai’s look of regret. “Ace, man, come on…”

Ace got in Trey’s face. “So why don't you say something? Are you just afraid you'll "lose your head" too? That's pathetic! You guys are supposed to be childhood friends?! Then act like it.”

I’m about to turn into John Mulaney’s father. It's so important that Trey realizes now that being silent on matters that you know are wrong does not make you innocent; it makes you an accomplice and complicit in said wrongdoings. No one cares if you feel bad, do something about it. “Trey, Ace is right. When you pity Riddle, you’re looking down on him, a friend isn’t a ‘yes man’ and what you’ve enabled him to turn into, no one will thank you for it, especially not Riddle. You’re a lousy friend.”

“You there! Be quiet! You are in a library!” The Headmaster shouted, approaching us sternly.

“You're yellin' louder 'n any of us, though!” Grim said. We all turned around to watch the Headmaster’s fury deflate.

The Headmaster coughed sheepishly. “Oh! *Ahem* Yes, my apologies. But let us strive to maintain the library as a quiet place for reading.”

I take ‘Rose in the Queendom of Roses’ out of my bag, I don’t need to know what happens to Alison, might as well return it. The Headmaster notices my action and speaks out.

“Ah yes Mr. Silvanus, I'm researching methods to send you back home. Precisely as I promised I would. Oh, but I AM gracious! And the library is, of course, an ideal place for serious research. It's not as if I came here just to secure the newest book in that popular series of novels. No, certainly not. *Ahem*”

I rolled my eyes, uncaring who saw, I won’t lie the Headmaster had me in his corner right until the last second.

Ignoring that, Headmaster Crowley carried on. “Incidentally, what are you all discussing with such grim faces?”

“Well, since you asked…” Deuce began to relate to the Headmaster the incident that had befallen them.

“Ah... I believe I understand the situation. You are resistant to the idea of apologizing, but unable to devise any other method to get the housewarden to remove the collar.” The Headmaster surmised, gloved talons to his chin deep in thought.

“Yeah, pretty much.” Ace said.

“I see. If you and the housewarden are truly unable to reconcile, you could always transfer. However, this is the dorm that the Dark Mirror chose for you based on the essence of your being. Any attempt to relocate would necessitate quite a burdensome process, as well as a new ritual.” The Headmaster informed.

“A transfer, huh...? That'd make me feel like I was running away with my tail between my legs.” Ace shook his head, no way would he up and run away from his problems.

“Hmm. Then it sounds like you should challenge Mr. Rosehearts for leadership of the dorm.” Headmaster Crowley said, removing his hand from his chin.

Ace, Grim and Deuce unanimously yelled, “WHAAAAAT?!”

The Headmaster was quick to wave his feathers about and shush them. “Lower your voices! This is a library!”

“But what you said was...insane!” Ace stared wide eyed at the Headmadge.

“There is nothing remotely "insane" about it. After all, that's how Mr. Rosehearts got the position.” Headmaster Crowley said with a grin.

“What exactly is the process by which housewardens are selected at Night Raven College?” Deuce asked.

“Trey said that Riddle became housewarden within his first week as a student here.’ Grim added, looking at Trey.

Headmaster Crowley raised one finger and elaborated. “There are several ways. You could be appointed by the previous housewarden, for example, or duel the current warden and win. A duel is certainly one of the simpler methods.”

‘Hmm I wonder what the other ways are? How could they possibly be harder than asking or being appointed?’ I think looking between Ace and Deuce.

Ace spoke up. “But isn't fighting with magic against the rules?”

“In general, yes. A duel initiated through a formal procedure and conducted in the presence of the headmage is another matter entirely.” Headmaster Crowley answered.

“I'm pretty sure the duel rules don't allow for preemptively handicapping your opponent… So this could be a way to force Riddle to remove your collar without apologizing. That said…” Trey looked apprehensively between his two dormmates, already feeling sorry for them no doubt.

The Headmaster turned to Ace. “The right to challenge a housewarden is bestowed upon all students when enrolling at Night Raven. So what do you say, Mr. Trappola? Will you challenge Mr. Rosehearts?”

“Sure, I'll give it a shot!” Ace confidently stated, fired up.

“Then I will too.” Deuce said, equally as pumped up.

“Me three!” Grim jumped with a fist in the air.

I just looked at Grim confused, ‘why tf does Grim wanna be a Housewarden? Hahaha, imagine Grim in Riddle’s attire. Can you even challenge a dorm you’re not a part of?’

The Headmaster put his hand up in front of Grim. “I'm afraid not, Mr. Grim. You cannot challenge a housewarden of a dorm to which you do not belong.”

“Myah?! Then how'm I supposed to get this buzzkill collar off?!” Grim pulled at his collar looking annoyed at the Headmaster.

“If I become housewarden, I'll just order Riddle to remove it! Easy-peasy!” Ace boasted.

Grim wasn’t impressed. “How will everyone know how tough I am if you do that?”

“Are you sure about this? I certainly didn't expect you to throw your hat in the ring, Deuce.” Trey said, looking semi worried for his earnest underclassmen.

Deuce’s confusion was visible. “You didn't? I think every man's gotta make a grab for glory at least once in his lifetime. And if we're teaming up to take him down, ya better believe I'm running the show!”

“Oh man, here we go again.” Ace eyerolled.

“Huh? What'd you say?” Deuce frowned.

“Then I'll get started on the paperwork.” Headmaster Crowley said with a clap of his hands.

I huddled closer to Ace and Deuce. ‘We’ll need to strategize first off, Riddle is a powerful mage even without his unique magic. Have you guys seriously considered what it means to run a dorm? Do you actually want the responsibilities that come with the job?”

Ace rolled his eyes again. “Don't get all worked up on me now. All we need's a plan. Anyone got one?”

“Hmm. Hard to imagine we can beat Riddle with straightforward magic. A solid left hook, on the other hand…” Deuce slightly grinned.

“Yeah, that guy looks like a pushover!” Grim agreed with a smirk.

“Are you guys nuts? He’d straight up go savage with how repressed he is, do not underestimate him, that’s how you’ll end up losing; thinking you’ve already won before doing anything.” I say looking wide eyed at the two delinquents.

The Headmaster chimed in. “Ah, did I forget to mention that detail? These duels are to be fought solely with magic.”

“What?!” Deuce’s grin erased.

The Headmaster just laughed at Deuce’s disappointment. “Ha ha ha! Nothing beats a good, civilized duel! Now, the paperwork should be prepared and filed on the morrow, and the duel scheduled accordingly.” With that, the Headmaster left.

“Aight, let's do this! I may not be the world's greatest mage, but...I'll figure something out!” Ace clenched his fist, ready to take on the world.

“That's the spirit!” Deuce clenched his fist as well, fired up for tomorrow's fight.

“My head's on the line here, so don't mess this up!” Grim shouted, as Adeuce rushed out.

“You guys…” Trey sighed watching the duo leave, unsure of how to make his stubborn peers reconsider their actions.

Ace smirked as he paused to call out. “When I'm housewarden, I'm gonna make Riddle fess up to bein' wrong. I'll make him apologize, too! And no one in the dorm is gonna have to live by any crazy rules ever again!”

And just like that it was just Grim and I. I have nothing more to say to Trey, so I turn to walk out with Grim. My mind floats back to ‘Rose in the Queendom of Roses.’ I felt it was appropriate to stop reading before the end, as to not be biased but now I’m not so sure.

Grim tugs on my pant leg. “Hey, hey Thorn! Imma keep an eye on Ace and Deuce, make sure they're giving it their all ya’know?”

My eyes darted to the book still in my hand. “Sure Grim, you could be the motivation they need, if you see them slacking let out a few fireballs.” Grim lets out a little chuckle and speeds away.

I search the library for one of the less cluttered tables, might as well finish my book before I return it, I shouldn’t be long.

‘The Verdict’

‘That Alison had returned from whatever bumpkin bungle she hailed from, good riddance I say. Fancy a land that makes people of that quality of character; disrupting the natural order out of curiosity! Hmmp!’ The young royal returned back to her future Queendom.’

‘As the scarlet haired princess made her long voyage home she was left with nothing but her thoughts to occupy her time. She thought back to all of Alison’s hairbrained thoughts, how non-wonderland they were, but had piqued her interest anyways. ‘Painting roses, having more than one option of tea served at an unbirthday party, the oddities she would prattle on about, like having a dog serve the tea biscuits rather than a frog as they would be less prone to snack on them.’

‘When Rose entered her home, no one dared greet her. Her valiant knights and soldiers kept their heads down, her attendants made themselves scarce, and perhaps best of all her parents made no acknowledgement of her gallant acts of service for their Queendom.’

‘Rose sat on her slightly smaller throne, and kept a stiff upper lip. As much as she loathed to admit she missed Alison, she did. Alison had been her one excuse to be something different. Permission to entertain different thoughts. Alison’s proding made her question why she was so devout to her land’s traditions. When she remembered everyone’s fearful look in their eyes, and her parent’s displeasure at maintaining order, Rose grew resentful. Rose was noble, she was bound by her fate to her Queendom, and she would uphold such a daunting task for her citizens, even if they grew to dislike her too. Being liked is subjective, and is not what keeps a Queendom afloat.’

‘If I am to remain alone for all my life, so be it. I cannot change my destiny or others, I shall dedicate myself to my Queendom’s service, even if no one cares or tries to understand me, it’s alright. It’s for the best.’

I closed the book with a dull thud and looked around. Reading the blurb it explained how some of these excerpts had been from the Queen’s private diary entries, that it had taken nearly 100 years of magic to unlock these sacred pages, and with permission from her family had been publicized. Well it's tough to say which parts were hers and which may have been fictional, but for a children’s story it’s fairly sad. Rose really believed she was doing what was best for others even at the expense of them and herself.

“HEY HUMAN!” A choir of shushes, shushed Sebek. I looked up to meet his stern gaze. He lowered his voice to a speaking volume and continued, “finally completed that novel? Took you long enough! I-”

I interrupt Sebek with a smirk, “Sebek, why didn’t you just check out another copy of the book? Surely with this meany students there’s bound to be a least a few extras?”

I watched in amusement as Sebek did mental gymnastics at the mere possibility that at least two copies could exist at once. Looking increasingly flustered, he dashed off. Nearly 20 seconds later he promptly returned, cheeks flushed with a copy of the book in his hands. “I COULD ASK YOU THE SAME?!”

We stared at one another for a long moment, Sebek mumbled,“(I refuse to believe that I had overlooked something and a mere human had outsmarted me!)”

Sebek was set to leave but I stood from my chair and stopped him. “Sebek, wait! Would you like to start a book club?”

“I- What? No.” Sebek looked pensive and annoyed all at once.

“I can tell you’re well read, and we’d be able to gain valuable insights from a non-human perspective and a human one, we both have something to benefit from, and we’d fight less over books if a time comes we have to share.” I coaxed.

I really thought Sebek was going to disagree, but at the last moment his facial muscles slightly shifted, “Alright human, I’ll participate in this reading-and-sharing club of yours. Upon our next meeting, let us read the writings of William Shakespeare’s ‘The Tempest’!”

“And Sebek?” He turned around to face me, “my name is Thorn, no need to feel embarrassed if you forgot.” I chuckle.

Properly ragging, he stormed off.

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Chapter Text

A Study In Scarlet Tyrants

In A World Of My Own

Part 9

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Throughout the school day, the Heartslaybul students and I were a buzz. Impatiently awaiting the after school special: ‘Duel against Housewarden Riddle!’

Heartslabyul’s rose maze had been transformed into a semi arena. The wide field of grass that once hosted the unbirthday party had now been divided by colored paint dictating out of bounds for the fights. Bleachers had been brought out for Heartslabyul’s residents, as well as a few guests that had heard about the duel. Whispers filled the air: “did you hear? They say someone has challenged Housewarden Rosehearts to a duel.” “Riddle Rosehearts? Seriously?! Whoever it is has gotta be outta his mind. Riddle will have his head in five seconds flat.” “Still, it’s the first challenge since Rosehearts took power. I’m pumped!”

Headmaster Crowley stood off to the side, waiting for everyone and the opponents to get settled in as he would be supervising the fight.

“You're saying Ace and Deuce are challenging Riddle for the housewarden's seat?! Please tell me you're kidding.” Cater whipped his head at Trey.

“I tried to stop 'em.” Trey sighed, rubbing his forehead.

Cater groaned. “Of all the stupid ideas... I just hope this doesn't make everything worse.”

“You and me both.” Trey said.

A hush fell over the arena as Headmaster Crowley announced, “we are about to commence two challenges for the housewarden position at Heartslabyul House. The first challenger is Ace Trappola. The second challenger is Deuce Spade. The current housewarden they have challenged is Riddle Rosehearts.” The Headmaster turned to Riddle, “now, in accordance with the duel rules, please remove the magic-sealing collars as they would provide an unfair disadvantage.”

With a lazy pen wave, the collars of Aduece disperserted. “Ah! FINALLY, the dumb collar is off!” Ace cheered, touching his neck.

“Enjoy your moment of freedom. The collar will be back on soon enough. I could hardly believe it when I heard you two intended to duel me. Is this a joke?’ Riddle scoffed.

“Do I look like I'm joking?” Ace snapped back.

“I'd never propose a duel as a joke.” Deuce seriously said.

“Hmph. Have it your way. Let us get this over with.” Riddle walked off.

Cater caught up with him. “Uh, Riddle, what do you want to do about today's afternoon tea?”

“A foolish question. You know that the rules stipulate I take my tea every day at 4 p.m. sharp.” Riddle stateted, standing on his side of the grass.

“It's just that it's already past 3:30…” Cater trailed off.

Riddle snapped, turning to look at Cater. “And you fear that I will be late? All the more reason to end this promptly. It appears I have little time to waste. Rather than facing my opponents in succession, I will take on both at once.”

“You can do it, Housewarden!”
“Knock 'em dead, sir!” The stans cheered.

Trey looked on silently.

“Cowards.” Deuce said, walking to the field.

“Myah. I got a bad feelin' about this.” Grim half muttered.

“Hey, at least we got a plan!” Ace said, following Deuce.

“Headmage, please give us the signal.” Riddle called out.

“When the mirror I've thrown shatters upon the ground, that is your signal to begin.” The Headmaster revealed an ornate silver compact mirror to the crowd. “Ready... Go!” The mirror shattered completely, the noise cutting through the tense silence, dancing in a million shards. Aduece charged forward, magical pens raised, Riddle remained stoic and yelled “Off With Your Heads!”
Five seconds was all it took for the battle to be decided. Riddle had won.

As Aduece gripped, and the crowd was stunned, the Headmaster reiterated, “visualization is key to spell casting. The better you are at accurately visualizing your magic's effects, the stronger and more precise it will be. It would appear Mr. Rosehearts has finely honed his magic.”

“Myah... They didn't stand a chance.” Grim hung his head low.

Riddle approached the shackled pair. “Hmph. You didn't even last five seconds. That was all you had, and still you thought to challenge me? You must be utterly humiliated. I guess my mother was right. A man who cannot follow rules is a man who cannot achieve anything.”

Deuce clenched his fists. “Tch... We agree that rules should be followed. But forcing others to follow nonsensical rules like the ones you've enacted is tyranny!”

“Then you agree that breaking rules is wrong. And in this dorm, I AM the rules.
Therefore, those who cannot abide by my decisions deserve not the heads they use to complain!” Riddle argued, color rising to his cheeks.

I couldn’t stand Riddle’s ego and called him out. “Riddle you’re wrong! You’ve been abusing your station for far too long and your power trip is going out of control. You are not the law, or God! Authority should derive from the consent of the governed, not from the threat of force!”

Riddle’s anger rivalled mine, “I am the one who decides what is wrong and right! What sort of pitiful education have you received, that you cannot follow such simple rules?” Clearly, you were born to parents with no great magical capability. And as a result…” Riddle looked me up and down and scoffed, “you lack even the basic education necessary to attend a school such as this. It's quite sad.”

A few gasps were elicited. I remained standing, staring down Riddle. His words didn’t affect me at all, I got inside his head, threatening his world view and now he was lashing out at me. He has to come to the cold hard truth that the ‘abnormality’ standing before him, magicless and not suffering is attending the same school he does, and that his trauma did not in fact better him, that it was for nothing.

“You little…” Deuce was vibrating in anger, holding himself back from beating his Housewarden.

“You shut your spoiled little mouth!” Ace however was not. He advanced on Riddle and punched him square in the face, knocking him flat on his ass.

“Wh-what?” Riddle gasped from the ground.
“Riddle?!” Cater and Trey went straight to a stunned Riddle’s side.
“Mr. Rosehearts?!” Headmaster Crowely called out.
“Whoa! He just punched the housewarden...!” The Heartslabyul students said in shock.
“Bam! Right cross to the face!” Grim smirked.
“A-Ace?!” Deuce looked wide eyed at Ace.
“Ace! Is your hand alright?” I gasped, covering my mouth.

“That's all I can take. Forget Riddle. Forget the duel. I'm done.” Ace announced putting his hands up.

“That hurt! You... p-punched me?!” Riddle shouted, now standing and rubbing his redding face.

“Kids aren't trophies for their parents to flaunt. And the accomplishments of a child aren't determined by the worth of their parents. It's not your parents' fault you became a tyrant - or anyone else's. You've been here a year and haven't even made a friend who will tell you you're outta line. And that's on you.” Ace pointed at Riddle.

“What are you even talking about?” Riddle asked confused, anger swirling.

“Yeah, maybe you had some rigid upbringing from a relentless helicopter-mom.
Is that all you are? An extension of her? Can't you think for yourself? You call yourself the "red sovereign"? You're just a baby who's good at magic.” Ace carried on, relentlessly.

Riddle was taken back.“Baby...? Did you just call me a "baby"?! You don't know anything about me! You don't know anything about anything!”

Ace nonchalantly agreed. “Nope, sure don't. And I don't need to. Your attitude tells me all I need to know - that you're nothing but a spoiled brat!”

“Shut up, shut up, shut UP! My mother was right! And that means I'm right too!” Riddle wailed, face scarlet, quite literally throwing a teenage sized tantrum.

“Riddle, calm down. The duel is already over.” Trey tried pacifying Riddle.

The Headmaster stepped in. “Mr. Clover is correct. The challenger has been disqualified due to physical violence. If you do not cease your conflict now, I'll have you written up for breaking school rules!”

“Ace is right, though! I've had enough of Riddle!” A non-distinguishable npc voice called out from the crowd. The rowdiness of the crowd grew, soon a product was thrown at their Housewarden.

“Huh?!” Riddle gasped, something with goo and shell was sliding off of his shoulder.

“An egg?” Trey blinked in surprise.

“Who did that? Who threw that egg?!” Riddle was outraged now, all he could see was red when he turned to face the audience.

The rowdiness and insults ceased at Riddle’s fierce look.

Riddle cracked. “Heh heh... Ah ha ha ha! You say YOU'RE fed up?! I'M the one who's fed up with all of YOU! No matter how strict I am, no matter how many heads I remove, you keep breaking the rules! All any of you care about is doing what YOU want to do! If the guilty party won't come forward, then I'll pass judgment on all of you! Clearly, none of you value your heads! Off With Your Heads!”

“Bwaaah! Let's get out of here! Urrrgh…” NPC’s cried out in alarm as their Housewarden’s magic was flying everywhere indiscriminately.

But Riddle couldn’t stop as he waved his wand and sang out. “Ah ha ha ha! How do you like that, hm? Now no one can do a thing to me! Do you see now? My strict adherence to the rules was clearly the correct path!”

The Headmaster chastised him swiftly and sternly. “Cease this improper behavior now, Mr. Rosehearts. I expect better from you!”

“Trey, if he keeps using his spell... This could get ugly, fast!’ Cater said anxiously.

“Riddle, stop this!” Trey yelled.

“Wow, way to totally prove me wrong here, pal! I call you a baby, and you immediately throw a temper tantrum! Ace mocked.

“Retract your comment immediately, or I shall skewer you where you stand!” Riddle demanded, pen aimed at him like a gun, a feral glint in his eyes.

Ace stood his ground unphased. “No way. I ain't retractin' squat.”

I slowly made my way closer to Ace, so as to not trigger Riddle. The gaze that was locked on Ace was crazed, and I was prepared to pull Ace out of there.

“YEEEAAAAARGH!” Riddle roared, the air had shifted, it lay heavy with intense magical waves, hazy lines engulfed the area.

“Dude, this is bad! You've G-2-G, now!” Cater shouted at us.

The Earth rumbled. Grim looked up at the darkening violet sky, “the rose trees! They're floating!”

“This is some serious magic!” Deuce balked watching more debris float upwards.

“Mighty roses, tear this brute to pieces!” Riddle shouted with a sinister cracked smile.

“Cease and desist at once!” Headmaster Crowley intervened.

“Everyone, you need to evacuate the Heartslaybul dorm now!” I called out to the few remaining npc stragglers, probably frozen in fear from the raw unfiltered power that Riddle was casting. My warning broke them out of their trance as they ran away. Ace turned to look at me, but not for long as a shadow was growing larger above us. Ace gasped, I grabbed a hold of his arm and half ran / half pushed him out of the flying projectiles way. We tripped, partially skidding on the grass, another shadow was upon us!

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Chapter Text

A Study In Scarlet Tyrants

In A World Of My Own

Part 10

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A white flash engulfed Riddle, a rainbow of card suit charms sprinkled off of him. Rather than the rose tree burying us, Ace and I were buried in a pile of playing cards.

Riddle gasped. “Nngh?! What just-”

“Huh? We’re still alive? What's with all these playing cards?” Ace dazed, grabbed a handful of cards just to let them slip through his fingers. I shifted through them as well, momentarily thrown off.

“All the rose trees turned into cards?” Deuce asked in bewilderment.

“Riddle, stop this right now!” Trey sternly called out, magical fountain pen in hand.

Cater, who had been standing next to Trey the entire time, was as equally shocked as we were. “Wait, is that Trey's "Doodle Suit"?! But... how?!”

“All the magic-sealin' collars are gone!” Grim said.

Trey adjusted his glasses, “what did I tell you? My magic can overwrite characteristics for a short time. So I used it to make "Riddle's magic" into "my magic."

“You can do that? That's gotta be some kind of cheat code!” Cater exclaimed

“N-no... Off with their heads! I SAID, off with their heads!” Riddle continued to swing his magic pen, more desperate than the last, but only a sea of playing cards were produced.

“Riddle, stop it. You’re only hurting yourself; can't you see how you look right now? Take a look at everyone around you” At Trey’s words the area was at a momentarily standstill. His magic didn’t end Riddle’s rampage, it only paused it.

The Heartslabyul students who had not yet evacuated, had heard and watched Riddle’s threat, and had something to say about it.

“He... He was really gonna do it!”

“He is completely out of control!”

“He's like some kinda monster!”

“What? Was my magic overwritten by yours? Does that mean your signature spell is stronger than mine?!” Riddle’s eyes were wide as shakily accused his friend.

“Of course it doesn't. Riddle, take a deep breath and listen to us.” Trey attempted once more to give Riddle grounding.

“Are YOU going to tell me that I'm wrong too? After all I've done to protect the rule of law?! Do you know how much I've suffered for this?! I... I refuse to believe this!” Riddle’s anger became a mix of tears, grief of being potentially betrayed.

Headmaster Crowley shouted, “cease immediately, Mr. Rosehearts! Any further attempt to use magic will leave your magestone completely tainted with blot!”

“But... I'm right! I'M the only one who's right! There is NO! POSSIBLE! ALTERNATIVE!” Riddle was practically glowing red, his tears now dried and only frustration remained.

“RIDDLE!!!!” Trey screamed.

In an instant, Riddle’s once pristine ruby red magestone had become stained with an inky black substance.

˘꒷꒦˘꒷꒦꒷˘꒦꒷꒦˘
♡
｡ ﾟ∘ ° ｡ﾟ

Riddle’s completion went stark white, ink clung to his now exposed figure, dripping from his crown and orifices, arms and boots were bathed in the sticky dark substance. An intricate ink-laced heart shaped mask covered his left eye; burning scarlet wisps flickered from said eye, his neck wore a dripping thorny heart choker. His once proper white uniform had been torn, and tattered, what remained of his clothes were now dyed red and black, solid ink created a heart around his bodice, sharp twine encircling his body, climbing up and mimicking a sharp throne head. Fat white roses adorned his hips, the tops turning black due to the overblot with inverse monochromatic playing cards stemming from them.

“Heh heh heh... AH HA HA HA!” Riddle’s voice had been altered, deeper with a scratchy sinister echo. “You are fools to defy me! You are not welcome in my world. In my world, I am the law. I am order made manifest! The only response I will accept from you is "Yes, Lord Riddle." All who defy me will lose their heads! Ah ha ha ha ha!”

The Headmaster shook his head. “Dear me, what have I done? How could I've allowed a student to overblot in my presence!”

"Overblot"? What does that mean?! He looks completely evil!” Grim asked, barely concealing his fearful tremors.

The Headmaster crossed his arms as he explained.“Overblot is a dangerous condition that mages must avoid at all costs. At the moment, he is overcome by negative energy, nay he has been devoured by it, and has lost control of his magic and emotions.”

“Okay, sure... but what does that mean?” Grim prodded further.

Deuce nodded alongside Grim, “Please explain!”

“Ah, geez. To put it in layman's terms, he's in evil berserker mode!” Cater huffed.

‘HOLD IT! Wait a minute! Cursed thought coming in. So anytime a magical guy has a bad day we run the risk of him getting akumatized by ink because his old ass pen jammed?’ (If I have to be burdened with the thought-connection of miraculous ladybug reference in twst, then so do you dear readers.)

“If he keeps releasing magical energy, we could be looking at a loss of life here - his included.” Trey stressed.

“Uh, WHAT?!” Grim shrieked.

Headmaster Crowley cut in. “The well-being of my students is my top priority. Therefore, I must evacuate them immediately. As for Mr. Rosehearts, we must restore his consciousness before his magical energy runs dry. For as bad as losing him would be, there are scenarios that are far worse… Listen well: I need all of you to seek help from the other housewardens and members of the faculty.”

That got me thinking. ‘What scenarios could be worse than death? And why couldn’t Crowley shut down Riddle’s overblot before it got this far? Sure there’s viable excuses now for the other student’s safety and not being able to involve yourself with a student’s homelife, but surely he had been aware of the drama going down at Heartslabyul? ‘Something is rotten in the state of Denmark.’ Does the Headmaster not possess the capabilities to detain or stop Riddle, does he not have enough magic and is keeping it underwraps, or does his neglect know no bounds?’

“HIIYAH! TAKE THAT!” Ace growled, aiming his pen right at Riddle, unleashing his magic.

“HUHHHH?!” The majority of our group let out, taken aback staring at the scene unfolding before them.

“I SUMMON THEE, CAULDRON!” Deuce yelled, a large cauldron smashed Riddle.

Grim joined the battle with a “FNNYAAA!!” letting his azure flames incase Riddle, detaining him to one area.

“What do you fools think you're doing?!” Overblotted Riddle seethed at his attacker's audacity.

Cater mimed dialing on his phone. “Um, hello?! 911? We've got an idiot emergency!”

Taking in Cater’s frantic look, I tell him ”I think you meant to call God and tell him he’s about to have some company!” With that I ran over to accompany the trio.

“You DID hear that part about how HIS life and OURS will be in danger, right?!” Grim whipped his head around.

“That's why we need to stop him now! I don't want that on my conscience, the housewarden going out like that!” Deuce yelled back.

“And I'm not givin' up till I hear him say "I was wrong and I'm sorry." Ace added, cracking his knuckles.

“We’re on a time limit, it's not guaranteed help will arrive on time, we’re here now and we gotta stop him! No one deserves to die over this!” I yell, standing in line with the trio, prepared to help in any way that I can.

Trey let out a long sigh, but nonetheless joined us with a look of determination. “All right, let's do this. I can overwrite his magic for a little longer.” Trey turned back to Cater and the Headmadge, “in the meantime, do what you can! Headmage, please evacuate the other students!”

“Wait! All of you! This is dangerous!” The Headmaster quickly ushered out, unmoving.

“He’s right! Are you S-R-S, Trey? You can't beat Riddle!” Cater called out in concern.

“So what, you're not even gonna fight unless you KNOW you can win?” Ace frowned.

“Yeah, he's right. That's weak.” Grim crossed his arms in disappointment.

“This is the only way we can think of to snap him out of this!” Deuce added.

Trey looked at Cater and nodded. “Yeah... I don't want to lose him. There're too many things I've left unsaid.”

“Ugh, I do NOT like or subscribe to this, but fine!” Cater threw up his hands and swiftly joined us.

The Headmaster looked torn between joining us or helping the other students. “Ngh... I'll be back as soon as I've gotten the students to safety. Stand firm until then!” The Headmaster dashed to the sounds of panicking students.

Riddle scowled and glared down at us. “Such defiance, from every last one of you! I shall take all of your heads!”

“Riddle's body can't take much more of this. We need to stop him before it's too late!” Trey said, preparing for battle.

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Chapter Text

A Study In Scarlet Tyrants

In A World Of My Own

Part 11

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A vengeful spirit arose from behind Riddle, larger and more intimidating than the monster we had encountered in the mines, it armed itself with the rose trees as if they were mere building blocks. Riddle had manifested an overblot monster. Its heart shaped glass head was adorned in a golden high tiered crown with intricate plated heart shaped patterns beneath, the left side of its head had cracked leaving the fractures and hole to drip and spill massive amounts of blot every time it moved. Its body was vaguely shaped in a red and black frayed gown, a high white collar, and four spade sticks behind its bodice, the design was remnant of the original Red Queen’s outfit.

“YOUR DEFIANCE IS A FUTILE ENDEAVOR. YOU WILL SUBMIT TO ME, EVEN IF THAT MEANS IN PIECES!” The monster’s rose tree was ignited in crimson flames as it swung down on us like a hammer. The atmosphere grew hazy and darkened as more trees burned and debris scattered.

Cater used his unique magic to up our manpower by three, strategic in his use of magical strength and stamina. Riddle was too overpowered for Trey to use his signature spell, but that didn’t deter Trey from giving it his all. Our party switched in tandem, rather than attacking all at once.

Riddle’s hysterical cackles filled the air as he watched us pant and wipe the sweat off our brows. While there wasn’t much I could do, besides dodge and call out when to evade a stray magical or physical attack, I am nothing if not observant. In the time we had fought, which could have been minutes or what felt like hours, I picked up on something.

I call out to the group. “We need to charge and combine our attacks if we want to throw Riddle off kilter; I’ve noticed after he throws or slams his trees we have a five second window, and when two of us attack that gives us another five seconds, ergo, if we all attacked as one after his next attack -”

“Got it!” Ace interjected.

The others followed suit, nodding. Cater recalled his clones as they all mentally prepared themselves and approached Riddle. Riddle wasted no time in utilizing his magic. The ground reverberated, charred petals and sparks sprayed in slow motion.

“FYNNNNNYAAA!!”

“HAAAAAAAAAH!

“URRRRRHHHHH!”

Riddle and his overblot stumbled back from the sheer magnitude of magic. Disoriented, Riddle began to lash out randomly, his focus and attack power dwindling slightly.

“AGAIN!” I shouted several steps behind the team.

“AHHHHH!”

“HYAAAAA!”

Each time our team overwhelmed Riddle, his stamina and resolve weakened, giving us the upperhand to simultaneously land more hits and have a longer break period. Both sides’ exhaustion was catching up to them, we just had to exhaust Riddle before we did it ourselves or he ended our careers.

Our energy spent was not for naught, Riddle swayed and huffed, dropping in on himself, his monster dissolving into a bubbling tar puddle. Riddle fainted, and as he fell closer to the ground, Trey ran to him and caught him falling with him in a heap.

“Riddle!”

“Housewarden!”

“TREY!”

Approaching the scene, unsure if we were successful in our goal, Trey flipped Riddle over and breathed a sigh of relief. Riddle was no longer in villain mode and had returned to his original uniform, he was no worse for wear than the rest of us, minus the ink residue on his face. We all collapsed in one big pile to rest, adrenaline wearing off. While Ace, Grim and Cater layed on the raised soil, Deuce and I leaned on either side of Trey.

I lazily watched Riddle sleep, he began to sweat and his eyebrows twitched. My head hurts from the sight of his unrest. I put a hand to my head to steady myself despite leaning on Trey.

Deuce and Trey turned to face Thorn, “are you alright Thorn?” Deuce asked. But to Thorn all they could focus on was the active ache in their head, dulling their senses. Thorn fell forwards, despite his sore body’s protests, Deuce stretched out his hand to keep Thorn’s head from hitting the scorched tufts of grass.

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I opened my eyes, the pain in my head had subsided, but I had found myself in a plush chair in a barley lit room. The only source of light came from a black and white film projected in front of me. A cinema? Looking around, it was only me and a single row of seats. Unsure of what to do or where I’d go, I decided to wait and watch the film.

The scene depicted had a long solid oak table with four upholstered chairs, a curved wall lined in windows with a diamond grid lit the scene from behind, the bottom half of the wall was detailed in wood paneling, and off to the side was a large wooden China cabinet. A formal dining room if I had to guess.

“Happy eighth birthday, Riddle. This year's birthday cake is a low-sugar recipe made with nuts and lecithin-rich soy flour to improve your cerebral function.” A clear feminine voice sounded, yet there was nobody I could see on screen, just a wispy shadowy figure.

A little boy appeared on screen, dressed in a rigid blazer, and shorts, the only color visible was his red bow around his collar and red hair. “Thank you. But, Mom… Just once, I'd like to try one of those tarts covered with bright-red strawberries…”

The shadow became agitated in a fluctuation of scribbles. “Absolutely not! Those tarts are monstrously unhealthy. I might as well feed you poison! Even just a single slice would exceed your recommended daily intake of sugar. Now, dinner tonight will be a tuna sauté with docosahexaenoic and eicosatetraenoic acid. Now that you're eight, your caloric intake should be 600 kilocalories per meal, so don't eat more than 100 grams of it. Understood?”

“Yes, Mom.” A young doe eyed Riddle looked crestfallen.

Suddenly, someone spoke next to me. “I'd always wanted to try one of those tarts with the bright-red strawberries. The local cake shop had them in the window. They shined at me like forbidden jewels.”

It was the present Riddle! His eyes were locked on the screen as he smiled sadly watching the scene unfold. The way in which he spoke gave no indication if he was speaking to me or not, or if he even knew I was present, so I said nothing and turned my attention back to Riddle’s memories.

The figures lines were back in order, “that's enough classical magic study for today. Your homework is to read the first fifty pages of the philosophy of language book referenced in today's magical philosophy texts. You may now have one hour of independent study before your potionology lesson.”

“Thank you, Mother.” Child Riddle said with a closed eye smile.

“I need some time to prepare the lesson materials. I will see you in one hour, okay?” The shadow exited the scene.

Riddle spoke again. “I was studying every possible subject, scheduled down to the minute. When I didn't understand something, the lesson was extended until I did. That was my "normal."

*knock, knock, knock*

“..Is someone knocking on the window?” One of child Riddle’s eyebrows went up as he swiveled around in his chair and apprehension peaked out the window, standing on his tippy toes and looking down.

“Whoa, he heard us!” A spiky green haired boy wearing a hoodie and glasses exclaimed.

“Hey, come play with us!” A messy haired cat eared boy in overalls and a long striped sleeved shirt cheered.

“Who are you?” Child Riddle asked in bewilderment.

The cat-eared boy jumped up and down in excitement. “I'm Che'nya, and that's Trey. Let's all play croquet! Oh, it's LOTS of fun!”

Child Riddle looked back to his books, and back to the new kids. “I can't. I'm supposed to be doing independent study, and I have a lot of homework to do.”

"Independent study" means you pick what to do, right? My grandpa says play is a form of study!” Che’nya stated matter of factly.

“Just play with us for a little bit!” Trey added, lifting up one of the croquet balls from his pocket.

“...O-okay... Just a little, though!” Child Riddle smiled shyly and swiftly made his way out the window.

“Hey, what's your name?” Trey asked, looking at child Riddle sitting on the window ledge.

“R-Riddle. Riddle Rosehearts.” Child Riddle bashfully introduced.

Each time Riddle spoke, his tone was even and flat, revealing nothing on how he felt reliving his memories. “I had the best time playing with Trey and Che'nya. We did so many things I'd never done before. They taught me lots of things I didn't know. After that, I snuck out of my room every day. To play with them.”

The next scene was right outside of Riddle’s dining room window. This must be his backyard or garden. Roses outlined the dining room windows and threatened to scale the walls, yet somehow child Riddle did not prick himself. The foliage was lush as the wind brushed through the trees and grass, there wasn't a cloud in the sky.

“Whaaat? You've never even tried a strawberry tart? They're out of this world.” Che’nya bemoaned in dramatic fashion.

Child Riddle nodded as they walked. “Yeah. My mom says sugar is basically poison.”

“I mean, you probably shouldn't eat too much of it, but calling it "poison" is kinda...yikes. You know, my family runs a cake shop. Let's go get a tart right now!” Trey took hold of Riddle’s hand with new found enthusiasm.

“Really? But...I shouldn't.” Child Riddle lightly protested, slowing Trey down only slightly.

“Just one slice. It'll be fine.” Trey reassured Riddle with a smile and a ‘keep quiet’ gesture.

Che’nya interjected. “One slice for YOU, maybe. I want a whole one!”

Riddle’s forced smile faltered. “A bright-red strawberry tart on a white plate. To me, it shined more brightly than any gem could. That first bite was so sweet. It tasted like nothing I'd ever eaten before. With each bite, I became more entranced...and completely lost track of the time.”

The movie cut back to the dining room, with a young Riddle looking down at his shoes in shame as his mother scolded him.

“I cannot believe this! Not only are you cutting independent study time, but I find you eating a mountain of sugar?! Those two hoodlums must have incited this behavior. You must never play with them again!”

Child Riddle looked up in alarm, teary eyed. “I'm sorry, Mother! I promise, it will never happen again.”

The angry mountain of swirling black lines was quick to admonish her child. “Be quiet! You've broken the rules, and I'll not hear another word from you. Clearly, you're not able to handle the freedom of independent study. I need to keep a closer eye on you.”

The scene faded to white, and this time Riddle turned to me, although his gaze did not quite meet mine. “Because I broke the rules, my favorite part of my day was taken away from me. I vowed to never break my mother's rules again. After all, she was the most accomplished mother in the city, and therefore, the most correct. But Mom… Why?” Riddle choked out, “why does my heart hurt so much? I want to eat a tart! It's my birthday, so can't I have some just this once? I want to play outside all day long! I want to make lots and lots of friends! Tell me, Mom, please...What rule do I need to follow to make this pain go away?” Riddle had tears streaming from his eyes, and in that moment I could feel what Riddle felt. The immense pressure weighed on my chest, lungs, and head, the intense yearning of longing, and the profound sadness that came with it.

“RIIIIIIIIIIDDLE!”

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“GAH!” Riddle and I awoke with a start. Many people were looking down at us, but my eyes surveyed the brightened atmosphere, the overblot was gone, all that remained was a rose garden in shambles.

“He's back!” Ace pointed in alarm at Riddle still laying in Trey’s lap.

“Thorn you’re crying, are you okay?” Deuce looked at me in concern.

I brought a hand up to my face and felt the stream of warm tears, I quickly wiped them off and sat up from Deuce. “I’m fine, it's not important right now.” I turn my gaze to Riddle’s wide eyes.

Deuce and Grim looked at me for a quick moment, but ultimately turned their gaze to a panting Riddle.

Cater let out a shaky breath. “Ah, I was so worried. I don’t even know what we’d do - 'cause we thought you might never wake up!”

Riddle gasped for air as he spoke, “what in the world… Have I done?”

“Ah, Mr. Rosehearts and Mr. Silvanus has regained consciousness. Excellent.” Headmaster Crowley smiled down at us in relief.

Riddle attempted to sit up to evaluate the damage he had caused, but Trey held him firm, “don’t worry Riddle. Just try to rest.”

Ace loudly objected. “Uh, that's just the sort of coddling that led to him going nuts in the first place! Now the garden is tore up from the floor up, not to mention that we could've died!”

Deuce looked off to the side as he said, “he's right. It was looking bad for a while there.”

“For cryin' out loud. When you humans let that stress build up, the results sure ain't pretty.” Grim crossed his arms and shook his head.

Riddle spoke in a soft voice, something none of us were familiar with. “The truth is, I... I really wanted to eat the chestnut tart.”

“Huh?” Ace questioned.

With each word, Riddle spoke faster. “And I don't care if the roses are white, or the flamingos are pink. And I prefer honey to sugar cubes in my tea, and I like milk tea better than lemon tea anyhow. And after a meal, I want to be the one sitting around talking with everyone…” Riddle suddenly looked up.

“Riddle...?” Trey slowly asked.

Riddle quickly looked back to Trey. “And I really wanted to play with you and Chenya more, Trey. *Sniff*... *Sniff*... WAAAAAAAH!” Riddle broke out into loud sobs.

“Riddle Rosehearts, in tears…” Cater mumbled wide eyed in shock. “Hashtag #WOW.”

I force myself to stop looking at Riddle. ‘This is just sad, watching Riddle cry so earnestly…I’m almost tempted to hug Riddle, but that doesn’t seem appropriate right now. And he was doing bad things…’

“You think a few crocodile tears is all it'll take for me to forgive you?” Ace demanded.

“Learn to read the room, Ace.” Deuce side eyed. Grim and I nodded.

Trey interrupted, “I'm sorry, Riddle. I knew you were suffering, and all I did was pretend not to notice.”

Riddle continued to openly wail, wiping the tears off his cheeks.

Trey continued in an even tone, “so I'm gonna say what I should have said earlier. Your way of doing things was wrong, and you owe everyone an apology.”

Riddle nodded and began to sniffle, between catching his breath he answered, “I’m sorry…*sniff*...*sniff* …I’m really sorry.”

“I know I've been saying I wanted an apology from Riddle, but now that I got one, y'know what? One stupid "I'm sorry" doesn't even come close to making up for what he did!” Ace shouted in anger.

Even I side eyed Ace. ‘Learn to read the room’ indeed. I’m sure Riddle has already come to that conclusion, why do you think he’s - *GASPS* Is this what I sound like to people!?’

“DUDE! Way to be a capital-J Jerk!” Cater flatly said.

Ace wasn’t deterred in the slightest. “And proud of it! Have you forgotten how he made a total fool outta me?! Have you forgotten how he just threw away that chestnut tart we worked so hard on?! That ain't something you can make go away with a few tears and a flimsy "I'm sorry"!”

“Wow. I ain't never met anyone who was better at holdin' grudges than I am.” Grim said, eyes widening.

“Then... Then what do you want me to do?!” Riddle innocently asked, tears stilling dotting his eyes.

“You know... I don't got a birthday coming up anytime soon.” Ace stated.

“Huh? What are you talking about?” Deuce scrutinized his gaze on Ace.

“None of us do? What's your point?” I give Ace a questioning look.

“So I demand a do-over for the unbirthday party! Except this time, we ain't gotta do squat. This time, YOU'RE the one who brings the tart!” Ace pointed at Riddle, who has since stood up, “and no getting Trey to make it for you! Do that, and then maybe I’ll forgive you.” Ace crossed his arms and looked off to the side.

“Reel it in tart dictator, you’ve got a tart addiction for real, get help,” I joked, trying to lighten the atmosphere.

Ace shouted, “quiet from the peanut gallery!” Lowering his volume he asked once more, “what do you say, Riddle? We clear?”

“Yes... We're clear.” Riddle agreed, face blotchy from just having finished crying.

“Ah, yes. Compromise is a beautiful thing. I believe that concludes this matter.” The Headmaster proudly states.

I jump a little at the sound of the Headmaster’s voice, he’s still here?

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Cater assessed the damage of the garden and groaned. “Welp, looks like we got some cleaning up to do. All that work making the garden Magicam-worthy, and now it's a total tire fire. Laaame.”

“I’ll help you.” Trey began to walk toward Cater, but Cater put a hand up to stop him.

“Trey, you should get Riddle to the nurse's office. That was a full-blown case of overblot. We need to make absolutely sure he's okay.”

Trey looked a bit taken back at Cater’s serious and honest expression.

The Headmaster spoke up behind Trey. “Mr. Diamond is correct. I will accompany you.”

“Understood. Thank you, sir.” Trey nodded, and promptly went back to Riddle’s side, exiting the arena with the Headmaster in tow.

The once radiant rose maze was more akin to a mound of ashes, the trees were scattered like sprinkles, and the formerly soft grass could be mistaken for sandpaper. Standing in the wreckage, it feels almost hopeless to restore… But it isn’t impossible, we simply have to have the courage to start. Nothing worthwhile is ever easy (or so they say.)

After evaluating what we could actually accomplish in an afternoon, surprisingly other members of the dorm returned and offered their help. Cater passed me a rake, but as I turned to give Grim a bucket to pick up the small rubble he wasn’t by my side.

Off in the distance, Grim wandered to the former blot puddle. It was just a stained patch now.

“Man, am I STARVED after usin' so much magic! Hmmm Hey, check it out!” Grim bent down and examined the solidified ink (at least, that's what I assume these crystalized rocks are. Solidified emotions, perhaps?)

Grim picked up the ebony stone and held it to the light. “That's another black magestone, just like the one we found at the Dwarfs' Mine!” He said in excitement.

Grim drew a small crowd with his discovery. “You're right. Wonder where it came from?” Deuce questioned out loud.

“You better not eat that Grim.” Ace sternly added.

“No way! After how great that last one tasted, I can't get that thing in my mouth fast enough! Thank you for the meal!!!” Grim expertly took his two paws and shoved the entire magestone in his mouth, and crunched faster than any of us had time to blink.

“Aaand there it goes.” Ace said, unsurprised.

I crossed my arms and sighed, “are any of us surprised at this point? Must be a monster thing.”

“Oh, Grimmy... Have some self-respect, honey! That was literally trash.” Cater sweat dropped.

Grim was lost in his own flavortown to hear any of our comments, making noises of satisfaction. “Ahhhhh! Rich and sweet, but with a complex hint of bitterness in the aftertaste. Equally delicious, but with quite a different mouthfeel from that last one I ate.”

“As a monster, maybe his stomach works differently than ours?” Ace mused.

Deuce grimaced as he watched Grim lay down to savor his meal. “Even still, eating trash can't be good for anyone.”

Grim’s head shot up. “Oooh! I just tried the grass, and the flavor was surprisingly pleasant! Crisp, even!” Grim began chewing the dark blades.

“Knock it off Grim! You’re making it look like I don’t feed you or something.” I called out sternly.

“That's our lawn! Don't eat that!” Deuce ran over to apprehend the little lawn mower that could.

“Uh, A-F-K while I go throw up…” Cater turned to return to his chores. As he passed by, he mumbled, “but...seriously, guys. Thanks.”

“Did you just say something?” Ace asked, turning his head to follow the back of Cater’s head.

“Hm? Nope. Not a thing.” Cater said with a bright smile.

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Chapter Text

A Study In Scarlet Tyrants

In A World Of My Own

Part 12

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The sky began to dye into streaks of pink and violet, wiping the sweat off my brow as I looked around, everyone else had the same idea, putting away their gear and retiring for the night.

“Fwnya… I’m bushed!” Grim huffed, leaning against his bucket of rocks tiredly.

“Too tired for a meal?” I ask with a knowing gleam.

Grim perked up at that, “never! I’m so starved, I could eat 10 cans of tuna! No! 20!”

Ace and Deuce joined us. While Ace was sweating as bad as me, Deuce looked no worse for wear. “Does that meal extend to us Thorny ol’ pal?” Ace grinned, untying his jacket from around his waist to wear.

Deuce thought for a moment. “Food does sound good, but the cafeteria would be closed by now… We could buy a meal from Mr. Sam’s Mystery Shop.”

“And have our wallets drained too? I think not.” Ace countered, arms crossing.

I crossed my arms and held my chin as I thought. “We could use the Heartslabyul kitchen, right? We’re allowed to use whatever ingredients are there?”

Deuce rubbed the back of his neck. “Probably? I only know how to make egg dishes though, and I just usually have some snacks in my gym bag if I get hungry after curfew.” Deuce's stomach interrupted with a strong growl, flustered Deuce continued, “I’m sure they’ll let it slide.”

“They better let it slide! It was *US* after all that stopped an overblot ontop of cleaning up right after! And more importantly, since prefect Riddle is in the infirmary - who’s going to stop us?” Ace smirked.

“Myaha. He’s right! To the kitchen!” Grim smirked wickedly, racing off towards the Heartslabyul dorm.

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“Thorn, this is so upscale!” Deuce remarked in wonder at the steaming bowl of risotto.

“Yeah when you said a meal I assumed you meant something microwavable - were you rich or something?” Ace questioned, sitting down at the counter to eat.

Grim drooled at the sight and aroma of food fresh off the burner and knew there was no time for stupid questions! He eagerly chowed down.

“What are you talking about? No. Risotto is like the cheapest thing I know? You just stir rice, broth and vegetables for a while, put it in a bowl and grade some parmesan on top.” I take a bite out of my creation, semi burning my lips, but I power through. “You quite literally stirred it, and you” I gestured to Ace, “helped prep the vegetables. Simple enough?”

“Even so, there’s no way - there’s so many rich students that attend this private college, so even though you say it's just rice and vegetables, they could be the expensive kind, and it's always on the menu at classy restaurants -” Ace’s debate was interrupted.

“This is so delicious! THANK YOU FOR THE MEAL, THORN!” Deuce interjected, eating once more.

“Hey, hey, there’s a private party of first years and Cay-Cay wasn’t invited?” Cater pouts for all of two seconds, smiling once more once when Trey also enters the kitchen.

“Fwnya! Bhouushhed!” Grim says through a mouthful of risotto, I assumed he said ‘busted’, it was pretty muffled through all that rice.

Before anyone else can say anything, I intervene. “Would you like to stay for dinner? There’s still a lot left in the pot for whoever wants any - we all worked hard today.”

Trey adjusted his glasses. “We just came to check what that loud commotion was and why the lights were left on.”

“Sorry.” Deuce sheepishly said.

“Make room for me, freshies!” Cater took the adjacent seat next to me, happily snapping photos and chatting about how ‘cooking together is half the fun’ and the Magicam foods that were trending.

I look up to Trey. “Well you’re here now, might as well. You can even pack some for Riddle if he’s feeling up to it, or save it for leftovers. Plus I have something I want to say to you.” I put my hands in my lap.

Trey looks surprised but sits across from me, joining our odd group.

“I’m sorry for my comments the other day.” A silence hung in the air.

“...What are you talking about?” Trey looked confused, as did everyone else.

“What I said about you in the library, that you were a lousy friend to Riddle, amongst other things.”

“Ahaha, maybe we should -” Cater attempts to stand and makes a gesture for the others to give us privacy, but I stop him.

I put a hand on Cater’s arm to have him sit once more. “It's alright - if I can criticize publicly, I should apologise publicly also.”

Trey looks at me, and waves a hand. “It’s fine Thorn, water under the bridge. And to an extent, it's not like it wasn’t deserved.”

I firm my gaze at Trey. “But I’m telling you it's not Trey. I shouldn’t have said it at all. You have your own reasons, and life that I know nothing about, and I shouldn’t have tried to but in. I’m sorry, Trey.”

I space out a bit as I wait for Trey’s response. ‘Truthfully, I don’t regret all the things I’ve told Trey, like how his actions were not beneficial for Riddle, but I do regret the judgment I passed calling him a lousy friend - it's not like kids know all the answers, he did what was probably best at the time, but we have to constantly change and adapt before we become complacent in something we cannot reverse.’

After an awkward pause, Trey spoke. “I accept your apology, Thorn.”

Cater faked blowing his nose and dramatically cried, “they grow up so fast.”

I turned to Cater, “speaking of growing up, when are we going on that date, Cay-Cay?”

“Oh, not this again!” Ace groaned.

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The following week, while the Heartslabyul rose garden was being tended to, I had managed to convince the ragtag group that my skills were much better suited in cooking rather than physical labour (it's hard out here for a semi-lazy magicless alien, okay?) Not that cooking doesn’t have its own merits, I just get more downtime and conversation. Speaking of which, today I had decided to join Trey in visiting Riddle. Delivering Riddle a fun ‘get well treat.’

“You’re going to give Riddle a matcha tea latte, paired with strawberries as an infusion?” Trey gave me a quizzical look as I poked the foam art.

“You don’t think he’ll go for it? Matcha is healthy, reducing stress and promoting digestion, and I assumed strawberries are his favourite fruit, plus I made it too cute to refuse, hehe.” I flash Trey my latest culinary masterpiece, a foam cat complete with whiskers and eyes. Too bad I don’t have a camera.

Trey just chuckled, “I’m sure Riddle will appreciate it, lets just keep the sugar content between us.”

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As we passed by the infirmary beds, there were a variety of ailments, each stranger than the last. Obviously you had your standard sprained ankle, broken arm, broken leg… Broken wings… Full body cast… Sheesh, these magishifters don’t hold back when it comes to sports.

Turning to the other side of the ward, one student was trapped inside a large yellow flower, or maybe it was a soft tuba? Another worriedly looked up at his floating and glowing hair, another looked to be growing crimson and teal scales, with one eye reminiscent of a snake.

Hearing an intense scratching sound, I turn to see one tall student’s top half dyed in a rainbow color, “oomph!”

My voice was muffled as I had just accidentally collided head first into a stranger’s large muscular chest, I screamed internally.

His arms wrapped around me to prevent my fall, however due to his kindness, my gift for Riddle has been squished.

Someone pulls me away, spinning me around. I quickly assess the treat. It didn’t spill thankfully, but my kitty now looks like they’ve just taken a spin in the wash cycle.

“Are you alright Thorn?” Trey asks, hands on my shoulders as he looks for any bruising.

“Oh no my latte.” I quietly say, not particularly caring that I had just ran into someone.

The stranger laughs a bit before speaking, “heh. Shouldn’t you be thanking me Trey for catching il tuo goffo cucciolo?” (your clumsy puppy)

I turned around facing the adonis I had just collided with. A long floppy eared rabbit beatman wearing Heartslabyul’s signature uniform. His long coffee-colored ears rested at his shoulders, his hair looked extremely soft and flouncy in its short style, with patches of dark brown and splashes of white. His olive tone was
decorated in light brown freckles and birthmarks. His light hazel eyes were framed in long dark lashes, and a small dark spade painted under his left outer eye - if I hadn’t been staring so intensely I would have missed it.

Trey puts on a polite smile, “thanks Mocha, we're just here to visit the dorm leader while visiting hours are still available, so if you’ll excuse us.”

Sure Mocha is pleasing to look at, but the vibe he’s giving off is a bit… “Thank you for catching me, and sorry for running into you.” I side step out of his way and follow Trey’s lead of ‘gtfo as quickly as possible.’

Mocha eyes me with a smirk. “I see you still have milk teeth. It's not polite to speak until you’ve introduced yourself, cucciolo.”

“Thorn Silvanus. And you haven’t said your name either.” I state plainly, not wanting to drag out whatever was unfolding.

Mocha winked as we passed him by, “the name is Mocha Cappuccino. see you around, cucciolo.”

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Riddle was sitting upright and proper in his bed, wearing an ivory dress shirt, reading what looked to be a study book.

“We come bearing gifts.” Trey announced, catching Riddle’s attention.

Riddle sat his book down, half smiling at Trey, but when his eyes met mine he went neutral.

Trey gave Riddle a small, colorful plaid bag of tiny square biscuits (where was he keeping that?) I passed Riddle the drink I had prepared for him, “how are you feeling Riddle? I made you a matcha latte with strawberry inclusions as a ‘get better soon’ gift.”

Riddle half smiled as he looked at the foam drawing. “You drew a frown for a ‘get well soon’ misshapen cat picture?”

“Well he was happy until I ran into somebody, it's still edible, promise.” I laugh lightly.

Riddle smiled, “thanks Thorn,” after a sip he set the matcha tea on the nightstand next to him, “I’ll be discharged tomorrow morning, 7 o’clock sharp.”

Trey balked. “So soon? Riddle you don’t have to push yourself so hard, it's only been a few days since -”

Riddle cut him off, “I’ve taken up enough time and space in the infirmary, I can continue my recovery at the Heartslabyul dormitory; what kind of dorm leader would I be if I was lagging behind?”

Trey looked like he wanted to say more, but my presence is probably what’s causing his hesitation. I try to make myself busy to give them some privacy, I am after all just some guy to these people.

I grab the first thing I see, a crossword puzzle. “I haven’t done this one yet, talk amongst yourselves, I’ll be too invested to listen.” I sit off in the corner and start reading the clues.

‘I wonder if there will be words I’ve never heard of before? Like Twisted Wonderland exclusive slang?’ And like that, I was hooked.

An undisclosed amount of time went by, but my crossword was done. I have no idea if it was done correctly though. This seemed to be the ‘Wonderland’ edition. ‘Brillig’, I’m familiar with from the Jabberwocky poem, ‘galumph’ was a stretch, and ‘frabjous’ that’s just there.

“You’re quite proficient at crosswords.” Riddle says behind me in my ear.

Startled, I spring upwards, turning around, “how long have you guys been behind me?”

“Pft - not long.” Trey fails miserably to suppress his chortle.

“Hmm.” Wanting to tease them back I ask, “not bad for someone you once deemed having a pitiful education born of parents with no great magical capabilities, wouldn’t you agree?”

“Erk!” Trey composed himself and Riddle looked called out.

“Oh right.. I said that, didn't I? I’m sorry for my careless words Thorn. I didn’t mean what I said.” Riddle really did look remorseful.

“It’s fine Riddle, and it's great you’ll be back in a familiar place with your friends so soon, I’ll see you tomorrow.” I wave goodbye to Riddle, but Riddle calls me back. “Thorn, there will be a history of magic test coming up this week for your grade, I hope you’ve studied.”

I just smile at Riddle and say, “you’re so thoughtful.”

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After rehabilitating the rose garden, surprise, surprise, my master plan on ditching the cleaning draft failed. At least I got to hangout in a non haunted building with proper lighting and heating with well stocked cupboards afterwards.

Grimmy, Adeuce, and I entered the dorm kitchen. Trey was whisking away, Riddle sat at the island reading the morning paper, Cater and Mocha leaned against the counter chatting, while two other rabbit beastmen I hadn’t seen before were making their own meals.

Cater looked up from his phone and loudly gasped, drawing everyone’s attention to us. “You guys look like a hawt mess, and not in the FOMO way.”

“Thanks senpai.” Ace rolled his eyes, sitting down across from Riddle.

Grim instantly started pawing at my legs, “Thooornnn, you have to feed me nooooow, or I’ll get haaangryyyy!”

“Long day huh?” Trey asked over his shoulder.

Deuce slumped forwards, head resting against the cool counter. “Ughhh… You have no idea senpai. And I still have homework and track…”

“Okay, I’ll find you a snack, Grim.” I make my way over to Trey and Deuce, avoiding making eye contact with Mocha.

“If you guys wait a few minutes, the shortbread I made should be cool enough.” Trey said, wiping his hands off on a towel.

“I’ll prepare some tea.” I say, heading towards the wonky looking tea cabinet.

While everyone else was off in their own little worlds, unbeknownst to Thorn, Mocha followed suit, and so did the other newcomers.

“Aw, you don’t really mean that, do you piccolo cucciolo?” Mocha closed the tea door with one hand from behind me. “First you treat me coldly, and now this? Wouldn’t you rather have a cappuccino?”

I wasn’t going to turn around until another voice spoke, “so this is the cane (dog) you’ve been distracted with? Hmpf. Looks more like a carino principe to me.” (cute prince.) The rabbit beastman was dark, with his long bronze ears tied up in a bun with the rest of his silvery and brown streaked hair. Light colored specs and scars danced across his exposed skin; he cooks and fights? His left eyebrow had a notch in it, his eyes were a deep green shade. On his waist were the Heartslabyul dorm colors.

‘DAMN! I don’t know what the hell they’re feeding this guy, but he is too damn big! Beef cake? More like carrot cake! This bunny has more muscles than Jack! And he’s Jacked!’ I look at the gym bunny wide eyed.

Mocha groaned, “this is my pain in the tail fratello (brother), Ex-presso.”

“You know it's Espresso, stupido fratello. I’m going to pound you.” Although his voice was neutral, he swung on his brother. Espresso and Mocha were now physically intimidating one another. I took this golden opportunity to slip away but another person stopped me.

The second rabbit beastman had ivory hair cut jellyfish style with only the tips dyed a light brown color, it was tough to gauge if his ears were floppy or upright as he had them pinned down. His complexion was lightly tanned with soft brown eyes that were behind a pair of thin framed glasses. He had lean muscle and wore the colors of Ignihyde’s dorm.

Linking his arm with mine, he walks me away from the quarreling brothers. “Don’t worry about my brothers, Espresso may come off as brusque, but he likes small and cute things and you fit the bill. And Mocha puts on airs of a philanderer, but he can be endearing. They both think dropping Italian words will boost their image which is a bit annoying though. Heh. My name is Latte Cappuccino, pleased to meet you, bel.” (Italian is a gendered language so I’m using ‘bel’ as a short GN form of bello/bella which means handsome/pretty respectively.)

Blinking at the candid smiling rabbit, it's hard to believe they’re all brother’s with their huge gaps in personality. “You’re eloquently spoken.”

“Heh. If you think I have a way with words, you should see me have a way with you.” Latte bops my nose and carries on giggling.

‘Ah. There’s the family relation.’

Cater turned his attention away from his phone once we entered the kitchen. “Hm? Thorny, I thought you said you were getting tea, not a cappuccino hehe.”

“Who’s that weirdo clinging to your arm?” Ace’s eyes narrowed, Deuce also fixed his gaze on the clingy rabbit.

“Latte Cappuccino, here to partake in a shared dorm meal.” Latte grinned.

“He doesn’t even go here.” Deuce mumbled.

“No matter Thorn, Trey took the liberty of securing herbal tea for our evening snack.” Riddle poignantly stated.

Sitting between Deuce and Grim, I pour Grim and I a sweet fruity smelling tea, raspberries maybe?

“Let me know what you honestly think, it's an old shortbread recipe I’ve tweaked, don’t hold back.” As Trey said this, he gave each of us a few samples.

Grim eyed the cookies placed on his plate. “Trey, maybe you need stronger glasses. These ain’t small breads at all.” Grim took a bite, “*munch* they’re hard plain cookies!”

Ace laughed loudly at that until he made eye contact with Riddle’s sharp look. Cater put a hand over his mouth to muffle his laughter.

“Grim! That’s just the name of them, don’t be insulting. Here,” I take Grim’s paw and have him dip the cookie in the tea, “you can dip them in tea to make them softer and enhance the flavor.”

Grim, seemingly pleased at this discovery, quickly dumped all of his cookies into his cup. Ahh… Kids are so interesting.

I lazily swirled my cookie around in my tea cup as we talked. I spot out of my peripheral, Espresso and Mocha entering the kitchen.

“Trey senpai, you truly are a baker. These cookies taste sweet, but not too sweet.” Deuce complimented.

“Uh-huh. That’s typical of our Trey. Constantly raising the pastry bar.” Cater winked, taking a few snapshots of the elegant setup.

“Excellent job as always Trey.” Riddle added, sipping his tea.

“Was there ever any doubt that it would be good? This is Trey, the baker, we're talking about here… Oh yeah this is Trey we’re talking about.” Ace said, remembering his upper class men's failed prank.

Eventually the conversation was a back and forth between proper studying habits, I tuned out the conversation for the most part to read a few pages of ‘The Tempest’ in preparation for Sebek’s and I’s upcoming book club. A page flip with one hand and with the other I continued to swirl the shortbread and snack. I felt eyes burning the back of my head.

I turned to see Espresso continuing to stare intently at me, presumably.

“Did the cookie offend you or something? I’m sure you can try one.” I tease.

“You’re just so… Cute.” He semi whispered.

“Hah? What?” Taken off guard I drop my cookie into my drink.

Espresso looked off to the side and crossed his arms. “Tch. You’re hearing things.”

I put another cookie in my mouth to distract myself, half out as I look for a pencil, however Espresso turns my head. “I think I will take you up on that offer.” He takes a bite out of the cookie still in my mouth.

Latte turns my head to the opposite side and holds my chin. “Oh no bel, you’ve got some cookies on your face.” He tilts my head back and licks the corner of my mouth, causing my left eye to close at the proximity.

“DID YOU SEE WHAT THEY JUST DID?!” Ace balked.

“For inappropriate misconduct… OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!!” Riddle seethed. Nothing happened, as he was still in recovery.

“👁👄👁 Hashtag #HearstlabyulGettingFreaky👅”

I sighed and looked at the smirking brothers and scolded them. Looking at Latte I started, “you could have just told me I had crumbs on my face, I could have wiped it off myself.” Turning to Espresso I continued, “and there’s literally a plate with cookies still left on it, you could have had one of those.”

“THORN! What kind of response is that?!” Deuce yelled, grabbing onto my face. “These no good punks… What they did was strange and weird! You have to properly tell them off and make an example out of them for good measure!”

The rest of the late afternoon was in shambles, Latte had received a month ban on entering Heartslabyul and Espresso had earned a month ban on anything in Heartslabyul not related to his dorm or studies. With things simmering down, Mocha approached me once more.

“Apologies for my brothers’ inappropriate behavior. Here.” Mocha passed me a business card with a picture of a coffee with a bunny foam art that read ‘Caffe dei Coniglietti’ and ‘Bunny Cafe.’ “It’s the most popular coffeehouse on Sage Island that my family runs, if you stop by you can have anything you like on the house.”

I know I’m going to regret asking but… “Is that.. Glitter on your lips?”

“Mmm, cherry flavor, wanna taste?”

“UGH!” Grim gagged. And the shenanigans ensued once more.

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“Here” Riddle pushed a beige colored box with a rose shaped ribbon design into my hands. I looked up quizzically at Riddle, Trey, and Cater. Their eyes imploring me to open the gift.

Grim and I had come a bit early to help set up for the Unbirthday Party, and to be the official taste testers of course, but Trey had called us over to meet with Riddle and Cater in the kitchen. Unfortunately as soon as Grim saw the tables being set up he made a beeline for it, Trey let the matter go and ushered me along.

“So there won’t be any excuses as to why you do not have the appropriate Unbirthday attire.” Riddle answered my confused gaze.

Unraveling the flower, inside the box was a lovely red sweater vest, white slacks, a casual dress shirt, a monochrome striped tie, and shiny checkered dress shoes. There was even a glossy red ribbon detailed in alternating card suits for Grim.

Holding the sweater up to my chest, I notice the left arm has a black ribbon running through the side ending in a bow to keep the sleeves together, and the right wrist has an embroidered heart; that’s one way to fix a popped stitch. I bring my attention back to the trio. “This is so lovely guys I -”

“No sweat Thorny! Don’t be so thankful just yet; these are just old - ah I mean - vintage clothes we spruced up a bit. You’re used to hand me downs right?” Cater looked me up and down in the dorm clothes Headmaster Crowley generously lent me.

“Cater!” Trey and Riddle chastised.

“Thanks you three!”

Chapter Text

With the rose garden restored to its former magnificent glory, the official do-over Unbirthday Party was ushered in. Although the traditional tea utensils, white roses, and oddities that lined the tables had remained unchanged, somehow the atmosphere felt lighter than before. With a lively tune in the air, the Heartslabyul students were in full swing.

“All hail our leader, the Red Sovereign himself... Housewarden Riddle!”

“We salute you, Housewarden Riddle!”

The Heartslabyul students chanted lively upon seeing Riddle take his accustomed place.

Once Riddle was seated in his heart throne, he began to scrutinize what he saw. “Hm. The garden roses are red, the tablecloths are white... This seems a proper unbirthday indeed. Is there a dormouse asleep in the teapo- Er, well, I suppose it's fine either way.” Riddle coughed, poised in his chair, a small smile on his face.

Trey sat to Riddle’s right. “Not everything has to change completely, you know. Like, maybe spread the jam on your scones, instead of on the dormouse this time? Let's try to set the bar at "it's great if it's this way," not "it absolutely has to be this way."

“Yes, that makes sense.” Riddle nodded.

Advancing toward the Heartslabyul group I’ve grown familiar with, all eyes fall on me. No doubt my new attire captured their attention.

Riddle cleared his throat, cheeks dusted pink. “*Cough* I see the garments are suitable and much more appropriate for an Unbirthday Party.”

“Red suits you, Thorny. I bet you are an Autumn!” Cater winked, elbowing Riddle and was quickly stopped.

“I’m glad the size fits you, but the tie is supposed to go around your neck, not your hair.” Trey chuckled slightly.

Ace groaned. “So you got new threads that look good on you, might as well transfer to Heartslabyul at this rate.”

“We have casual dorm wear??” Deuce looked in confusion.

“Heh. I just thought the tie would be more festive this way, and thanks for the compliments.” I winked, laughing. “And thanks again, Trey, Riddle, and Cater for the ‘Unbirthday Party proper’ clothes.”

Ace sighed tiredly, taking a seat next to Deuce. “I can’t believe we got roped in to cleaning up and preparing the garden again… for an entire week.”

Deuce gave Ace a few sympathetic slaps on the back. “There, there, it couldn’t be helped. At least the Housewarden recovered from his overblot without any complications.”

“And the garden is Magicam-worthy once again! Hashtag #nofilter on this gorgeousness!” Cater happily announces, looking through his mobile camera lens, and promptly sitting to the left of his prefect.

“Blah blah blah! Let's just eat already!” Grim’s eyes were sparkling at the feast. He pounced on the empty chair next to me. (I sat to the right of Ace.)

“Then eat we shall! I'll get the-” Cater made a motion to grab a plate but the slam of Riddle’s hand’s on the table put a halt to everyone’s merriment.

“Wait a minute!” Riddle sternly announces with a frown.

“Huh?” Cater blinks unsure if he heard correctly.

“There’s a white rose…!” Riddle looks past Cater to the adjacent rose tree, and sure enough, a solitary white rose stuck out like a sore thumb.

“We missed one?!” Ace gasps in shock, everyone else flinches too.

“Aaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!! Ace, Deuce, I told you to make sure to paint EVERY rose!” Cater chastise in a slightly higher pitched voice.

“Wait, this is our fault?!” Deuce blanched, turning wide eyed to stare at Cater.

“R-Riddle, listen…” Trey attempts to quell the explosive temper that will surely ensue.

I mumble “as the saying goes ‘if you want something done properly, you have to do it yourself.’”

“Just kidding! I suppose I can overlook one or two missed roses.” Riddle chuckles lightly.

“R-really?! That's so generous of you, Riddle!” Cater slightly laughs too, scratching his ear.

“If we work together, we should be able to get them painted in no time.” Riddle grinned.

“What? They still gotta be painted?!” Ace almost slumps into his tea and saucers but stops himself.

“Even so... I'm impressed. You've changed, Riddle.” Trey crosses his arms in a laid back manner proud of Riddle’s accomplishments.

“I'm starvin' here! Let's just get these stupid roses painted or whatever!” Grim’s eyes were ignited in passion.

The matter was settled in under a minute with zero fanfare. A flick of the wrist, and presto-chango, white was stained red. It’s not like it was a ‘where’s Waldo’ situation. Settling back down, the crispy pastries, sweet berries, and colorful teas that covered the table were truly eye-catching.

“So what happened to that tart you were supposed to make for us, prefect?” Ace asked with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

“I made it for you, as I promised I would. Here: one strawberry tart, crafted by yours truly.” Riddle placed a simple white box on the table; revealing a slightly off circle glossy glowing red tart.

“Nice! The shape's a little off, but I can tell you put a lot of work into that glaze.

A fine job indeed, especially considering it was your first!” Trey praised.

“Oh, puh-leeze. There you go spoiling him again. How about we actually TRY it before you start fawning all over him, Trey?” Ace teased.

“Hold it! Don't you start cutting that before I get my Magicam! *SNAP* *SNAP* *SNAP* ...Okay, got it!” Cater sat back down.

Watching the tarts being passed out, I am reminded of Trey’s comments in the kitchen. I eye the innocent looking tart warrily. I don’t know if I’ll like where this is going. But Trey doesn’t look put off when he places a tart on his plate. Is he just that dedicated to the bit?

“Tch. I see Cater hasn't changed a bit either. All right, let's dig in! *munch*” Ace eagerly dug in with his fork and the others followed suit.

Grim ate with gusto, making quite the racket as he indulged. *Munch* *munch.*

Riddle and I accidentally lock eyes with one another. We both realize we have yet to touch our plate.

“Do you not like strawberry tarts…?” Riddle asks sheepishly.

“Oh I do. I just want to savor everyone else's reactions first.” I smile.

Riddle gives me a confused look, but nonetheless takes a bite out of his tart.

“Hmm..?” Deuce stiffened suddenly after his first sample.

“This is kinda…?” Trey and Cater unanimously said with equally shocked expressions.

“SALTY!” Everyone cried, scrambling for their drink or napkins to rinse off the remainder of the tart. (Read: salt.)

“Whaaat?” Riddle’s face twists into disbelief.

“Err? This isn't KINDA salty.” Ace coughed. “It's a full-on salt lick! What did you put in this?!” Ace frantically demanded, downing another cup.

I shrug my shoulders and grab my fork.

Grim in a weak voice protests, “noooo, save yourself! Ack-”Grabbing his throat he sucks down more tea.

I take the smallest bite, my left eye begins to well up with tears from the salt. It's like biting the ocean!! … It’s not that bad though… Just surprising.

Riddle looks alarmed at his peer’s reactions. “But I followed the rules exactly, and measured everything precisely! Unless... Oh! Could it be... from the oyster sauce?” Riddle mused, turning his gaze to Trey.

“Wait... did you actually use that Walrus-brand oyster sauce Trey jokes about?” Deuce’s voice was slightly horse, staring buggy eyed at his prefect.

“But Trey said that oyster sauce is an unlisted secret ingredient in all tarts!

He said all the finest bakers use it…” Riddle quickly clarified.

“And you actually believed him?! How could you not tell that he was joking?!” Ace made a show of gagging half way through his anger.

“Dummies are sure to flock together, eh big bird?” I watery eye Ace, taking a quick drink.

“Even if you believed the joke, it was only supposed to be a splash. How much did you put in?” Cater gawked, covering his mouth with a napkin.

“It's an unlisted ingredient! How could I measure it if he wouldn't tell me how much to put in?!” Riddle defended, cheeks turning red out of embarrassment.

“Pfft... Ah ha ha ha ha! I can't believe someone actually fell for the ol' oyster sauce prank! Hahaha!” Trey full on belly laughed, scotting his chair back to hunch over and grab his sides from laughter.

“Ha ha ha... Yes. Quite humorous indeed. I truly am a fool.” Riddle’s red flush had disappeared as he join in.

“Ha ha! It really is so disgusting that it's actually kind of funny!” Deuce stifled his laughs to comment.

“Yeah, what else can we do but laugh?” Ace smirked.

“If we didn't laugh, we’d cry, hehe.” I add.

“You know, in its own weird way, I think it's actually kinda good!” Grim tactfully said.

“Right? It really isn't half as bad as you'd think.” Cater agreed.

“Seriously? You're agreeing with Grim, Cater? He literally eats garbage off the ground.” Deuce said in alarm.

“Look, I'm not saying it's amazing or anything!” Cater started.

I nod along with them. “Mmm, yeah, it's edible, and after time has worn away the shock, it's not awful.”

“But you like it because it's not sweet, right?” Trey pressed, looking at Cater.

“Huh?” Cater whipped his head to Trey on the call out.

“You've never really liked sweet things, right?” Trey had a knowing look.

Cater seemed surprised, his voice got a bit quieter. “Yeah, you got me. But how did you figure it out? I've never told anyone that.”

“Because you casually bring up my Doodle Suit spell every time we're eating sweets. You hide it pretty well, but that was a giveaway.” Trey answered plainly.

“Ack! My secret is out! This is so so embarrassing! Especially after what happened to you and Riddle. I should have learned by now that keeping your feelings on the DL is not a great idea.” Cater awkwardly laughed.

“How about I cook up a quiche for the next unbirthday party?” Trey smiled.

“That sounds totes amazing to me. Just make sure it's as photogenic as the tarts!” Cater winked.

“Mm mm mmm! Your baked goods are always so delightful, Trey. *munch* *munch*” The jewel toned tart held in Riddle’s hand slowly began to disappear! Without warning, the floating head of Che’nya appeared! Finishing Riddle’s tart, he hummed a little tune in delight.

“Che'nya?! What are you doing here?!” Riddle sputters back in surprise, nearly falling out of his chair.

“Hm? I came to celebrate my unbirthday with all of you. A very merry unbirthday to you, Riddle.” Che’nya closed his eyes and gave a wide smile, making his entire body visible as he stood close to Riddle.

“The unbirthday party is a Heartslabyul House tradition. It does not pertain to you.” Riddle crossed his arm, annoyed, but his voice held no ire.

“And those two? What about them?” Che’nya gestured with his eyes in a relaxed pose in Grim and I’s direction.

I grin mischievously at Che’nya. “Why don't you stick to your books, school boy, AHAHA!”

Che’nya has the good sense to chuckle at my joke, everyone else just looked a bit confused more than anything - I’m sure my jokes will catch on eventually.

“Hey! You're that weird semi-invisible cat guy from before! So you never told us - what dorm are you from?” Grim puts his paws on his hips as he stares down and interrogates Che’nya.

“Che'nya isn't even a Night Raven student. He's a student at our long-time rival school, the Royal Sword Academy.” Trey informs Grim

“Whaaat? You go to a different school?” Deuce abruptly stands.

“The frickin' Royal Sword Academy, no less?!” Ace almost falls out of his chair from leaning back.

‘Oh yeah, I have to look surprised at this information don’t I?’ I make my eyes go wide and put my minor in acting to work, “Royal Sword? There’s another magical school?” ‘Was that too dumb? I mean I did peep RSA on the map when I first got here… Eh who cares, I’m an alien, sky’s the limit when you dgaf.’

“Did that guy just say the "Royal Sword Academy"?!”

“He's one of those pompous jerk-faces?!’

“What?! Who's from Royal Sword? We gotta run 'em outta here!”

The Heartslabyul NPC’s were getting louder and rowdier with each passing second, until their gaze fell to Che’nya’s unique attire.

“Whoopsies, now that I've tasted some tart, perhaps I should see myself out. hehehe.” Che’nya turns in the direction of the angry mob with an air of nonchalance and smiles as he dashes off into the rose maze.

“He's running for it!”

“After him! Don't let him get away!”

The Heartslabyul students turned hostile and gave chase.

“Whoa, everyone turned bloodthirsty real quick.” Grim followed the mob with his head in surprise.

“The vast majority of Night Raven College students perceive the Royal Sword Academy as the enemy.” Riddle said, sipping his tea.

“No surprise, given that they've kicked our butts every year for a hundred years straight…” Trey rubbed the back of his neck.

“Hey, stop harshin' the vibe! This is supposed to be a day of celebration. Can't we all just enjoy our unbirthdays?” Cater switches topics and rallies everyone to get back on track.

“Myah! Merry unbirthday or whatever! I'm gonna eat till my stomach explodes!” Grim fist pumps and dives straight into another tart.

‘Grim is just like me for real - his quest for food resonates with me, hehehe.’ I laugh to myself and dig into a few decadent pastries calling my name.

☆ SAVANACLAW DORMITORY - LEONA’S ROOM ☆

“Awww, sounds like those Heartslabyul twits are having some kind of feast today. Must be nice.” Ruggie turned his gaze from the wide balcony, still folding a towel and looked at the other inhabitant lounging in the room. “How come Savanaclaw doesn't have any traditions that involve eating lots of free food?”

“Bah, it's a beautifully sunny day and they're stuffing their faces with cookies and cake? Grossin' me out over here. Anyway, Ruggie. You know that's not what I'm here to ask you about.” Leona sits up and side eyes Ruggie with a scoff.

“Ah, that. Just leave it to me, Boss. All the preparations are proceeding smoothly! Shishishishishi.” Ruggie completed his chore and picked up the empty laundry basket.

“Then those fools won't be happily guzzling tea for much longer. That goes double for that snob Malleus. They got no idea what's comin'... Heh heh. Ah ha ha ha ha ha!” Leona crosses his arms smirking, glazing outside the stone arches before promptly leaving for elsewhere.

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“Come on Thorny! We gotta sneak - ah leave - early to beat the rush hour!” Cater paused for a minute, taking in my appearance. “That's what you're wearing for our phone date?”

“Um, like you’re dressed any better.” I remarked. I was wearing the ensemble I had received for the Unbirthday party, Cater was wearing patchwork color block pants, (Aelfric Eden “Back to 90’s” Patchwork Color Block Corduroy Pants) a loose fitting red shirt with a rose detail on the upper right corner, and a checkered snapback and fanny pack.

‘I’m glad I have clothes that don’t scream ‘NRC.’ I have no idea how anyone would react if they recognised the uniform. What am I saying? Of course people would recognise the name - it's a prestigious long standing institution - that’s like someone not knowing Harvard or Yale… But thinking about how Che’nya was chased out, I don’t know if someone else from RSA would be so friendly. Sure Neige is, but he’s Neige.’

“The 90’s called - they asked you to stop calling.” I tease.

Cater faked offence with a dramatic gasp. “The 90’s are trending RN, not that I’d expect you to know, heh, but worry not my fashionless under class men. That changes today.”

We continued walking to the bus stop. “You’re really going to buy me a phone? With a touch screen and everything? And not one of those flip ones?”

Cater simply chuckled. “Yeah sure, why not? I said I would, plus my father is a banker, I’ve got coins to drop on you baby.”

I bristled at that. “No, don’t start! I’ve had enough of that from those rabbit brothers to last me a lifetime.”

Cater chuckled as we waited.

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For a magical town, it's literally just a town. I don’t know what I was expecting, but I feel disappointed and relieved all at once. It’s reminiscent of European towns that have their streets paved in cobblestone with a variety of vendors and shops throughout the streets, yet it's spacious.

Cater leads me into a corner shop, linoleum floors and lights that give off a blue hue. The technology that lines the shelves look the same; smartphones and tablets. Cater must have already known what model phone he planned to get as he instantly starts chatting up the cashier. Feeling a bit left out I haggle the price where I can, I’m not trying to drain my new friend.

New phone in hand I beam at Cater. “Let's get matching phone charms to commemorate this occasion, and I’ll take you to a cafe, my treat.”

Cater smiled and scratched his ear. “I never knew you were such a smooth talking bargain hunter, where were you when I dropped over 1,000 madol on my phone.”

Pursuing the charm aisle I find the perfect matching charms for Cater and I. It resembles what I think could be a twinkling star or a big piece of glitter. Although there's a multitude of colors, I grab two pink ones. (if you know what Galinda’s wand in Wicked looks like - it looks like that.)

I hand Cater his phone charm. “Heh. Cute Thorn, I think my 90’s vibez are rubbing off on you.”

“Totally. To the first of many. I wanna load my phone up so full of charms it’ll resemble a magic wand that will be classified as a weapon, so I can ‘bibbidi bobbidi beat tf out of people’ with my own magic.”

Cater started wheezing at my serious expression. “You’ll need a phone case to go with it then, pfft-” Cater covered his mouth.

Exiting the shop, I show Cater the cafe card I got so he can lead us there. I’m taking a gamble that the rabbit beastmen won’t be there.

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“Ah cucciolo you came, although I wasn’t expecting you to bring someone else on our date - my mistake for not taking the time to explain to a cucciolo scioco.” (silly puppy.) Despite Mocha words, he wears a joyful expression and leads us to a table.

The interior of the bunny cafe was sophisticated, sleek, with a cozy atmosphere. Warm toned lighting dispersed from low hanging light fixtures as well as lined the back of a monochrome patterned accent wall, a long coffee brown sofa ran underneath. The same colored chairs and varying sizes of tables filled the space, until the front of the cafe bar. A black counter with beige colored granite shone with twinkle lights, highlighting their impressive stock and menu. Despite the number of people present it still remained relatively quiet.

After we ordered, Cater and I sat in comfortable silence, he scrolled on his phone as I jingled my new charm, practicing my ‘spells.’

The ‘sea bunny’ is a caffe misto with a large amount of foam sprinkled with chocolate shavings paired with two well placed chocolate waffers to mimic bunny ears. It's cute, interesting, and a drink with the least amount of coffee. It suits my tastes perfectly.

Cater ordered a black coffee. That also suits Cater’s tastes; robust and savory in flavor.

Mocha places Cater’s drink in front of me, and mine in front of him. “Trying to impress me or your date?” Mocha winks at me.

As soon as Mocha walks away, Cater and I look at one another and instantly switch drinks.

Staring at the black pool staining the petite white cup, I can’t help but say “that darkness looks abysmal.”

“Heh, just like my soul.” Cater quietly says, taking a sip of the steaming liquid.

I look at the sweet creation and remember something. “Cater do you want to take a photo of my drink for magicam?”

“Is that why you ordered it? Aww, I occupy my little under class men’s thoughts <3.” Cater cooed. “You could also post to magicam - your first post will be so aesthetic, lowkey jelly.”

“I don’t have an account Cater, I just got this phone.” I hold up my phone and shake it as proof.

Cater became animated, “UH - We’re fixing that like RIGHT NOW.”

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[Caterd.updates]

[5 images attached]

[Caterd.updates tagged you in ‘Cafe date w my fav freshie ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡’]

[Alienprotag]

[♡⸜(˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶)⸝♡]

[How I feel after hanging out with my bestie ^]

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[Alienprotag]

[Hi Neige, it’s me Thorn, I finally got a phone! (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶) We met in the forest a week or more ago, hope you still remember.]

[Daydreaminsnow]

[😊THORN!]

[Of course I remember my charming savior! Hi!]

[Hehe. Are you free to text now? It’s been sooooososoooo long. 🥺]

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BOOK 1: A Study In Scarlet Tyrants: Complete

Coming soon: BOOK 2: The Second-Rate Usurper, Unyielding.

Chapter Text

The Phantom Bride

Love At First Fright

Part 1

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Passing by the hallway window, breakfast in hand, I watched as crisp auburn leaves twittered and spun to the ground. Grim and I ate our meal in silence, savoring every bite of the vegetable pancakes with fish sauce. After breakfast it was onto maintaining Ramshackle’s upkeep as was our little tradition on Sundays. A back and forth with Grim to do his chores was also a tradition, yet despite his moaning and attempts to flee, Grim always comes around. I handed Grim a broom to sweep the hallways while I soaked a sponge for the interior and exterior windows. Not much time had passed and Grim was already throwing a fit.

“This stinks! I don't wanna do a buncha lousy cleanin'!” Grim dropped his broom to the floor and crossed his arms.

Walking over to Grim’s little paw stomps, I looked down to him. “The sooner you stop whining, the sooner it gets done.”

Grim stuck his fist out. “C’mon, one more game of roshambo, double or nothing–”

“NOW SEE HERE!”

“Myahhh?!”

Properly startled, Grim and I turned to the source of the booming voice; a ghost in regal uniform materialized behind us.

“What are you filthy vermin doing here?” The ghost demanded.

“Oh, it's just one of our usual ghosts… Wait, no it ain't. This one's sportin' a totally different getup.’ Grim pointed at the ghost’s large white top hat.

“This domicile is the princess's guesthouse. Outsiders are strictly forbidden!’ The ghost threatened, floating towards us.

Grim got into a fighting stance as the ghost approached us. “What princess? And what's this "do-mi-seal" stuff you're jabberin' about? Fling those fancy words around all you want. This is MY dorm, meanin' YOU'RE the outsider, bub!”

The ghost glowered down at us. “How patently absurd. This manor has belonged to our nation LONG before you rapscallions were born. I'll have to give you a sound drubbing if you refuse to leave!” The ghost raised his arms and advanced on us at lightning speed.

It wasn’t much of a battle, once the ghost swung, dozens of other ghosts in the same attire swarmed the hallway and attacked from all sides. Grim and I were quite literally pushed out of ramshackle. The ghosts only seized fire once we were chased out of the property with a slam of the iron gate.

Grim pulled on my jacket sleeve. “We just got ousted from our own dorm... What in the name of tuna is goin' on?! Hey, Thorn! We gotta find the headmage and get him to evict those ghosts!”

I nodded to Grim. “Right! These aren’t our usual run-of-the-mill spectres. If what I think is happening is happening - it better not be.”

Running through the courtyard, up the stairs and throwing open the Headmaster’s office doors, Grim and I explained the situation unfolding at ramshackle.

“A gaggle of ghosts in white hats took over your dorm and kicked you out?” The Headmaster folded his arms on his desk, looking completely unamused.

“That's right! They just showed up and started actin' like they owned the place! Spoutin' off some hoity-toity gobbledygook about a princess too.” Grim elaborated.

“A princess? Ah, now I see! Your dorm was unoccupied before this year so I didn't address the matter, but… I suppose it's that time of year again.” Unfolding his arms, The Headmaster stood up and walked towards the grand window.

“You’re familiar with these annual ghost soldiers?” I question as the Headmaster walks his way back to us.

“The ghosts who so unceremoniously ejected you from your dorm are the Ghost Bride's retainers.” The Headmaster explained.

“Ghost Bride? What kinda title is that? I can't tell if it's supposed to be swanky or spooky.” Grim mused.

Headmaster Crowley elaborated, preening all the while. “The story is that she's a princess of a kingdom that fell long ago, or some such. She dreamt of marrying a handsome prince. But she tragically perished before that dream could be realized. To this day, her ghost clings to the idea of marrying the perfect prince. She always comes to Twisted Wonderland around this time of year, searching for a groom. And when she does, she and her retainers use Ramshackle Dorm as their base of operations. Out of all the decrepit, abandoned dwellings in this world, her royal highness picked ours. It's really quite the honor. Heh.”

Grim was not preening at the Headmaster’s ‘humble’ brag. “We got kicked outta our own home and you're BRAGGIN' about it? That ain't right! You gotta show those pompous spooks the door!”

“I'm afraid I can't be bothered—ahem!—I mean, though I sympathize with your plight, we shouldn't bother them. After all, she is searching for a groom she'll never find.”

I crossed my arms in a huff. “I’m not surprised… I figured this is how the solution would go.”

The Headmaster preened once more, “Thorn you clever little fledgling. I knew you’d understand.”

Grim interjected, “why won’t she?”

The way the Headmaster quickly took his seat and crossed his legs, one would think we were old friends getting ready for a hot gossiping fest.

“Her qualifications for a perfect prince are, and I quote:
"At least 180 centimeters tall, with an air of nonchalance!"
"Healthy, lustrous skin! Lidded eyes! A charming smile!"
"Bright, shimmering hair! Lips so arresting that you just have to kiss them!"
The Headmaster chuckled, “there's more, but you get the gist. In summary: A preposterously prepossessing gentleman. Her standards are pure fantasy. She'll never find a man in Twisted Wonderland who comes close. Ha ha ha! Ramshackle Dorm is the only thing that suffers from her annual flight of fancy. Give her a few days, and she'll give up and leave. It's hardly worth all this brouhaha. I advise you to let it go and find a friend to stay with in the interim.”

The Headmaster’s doors were flung open once again, Ortho came flying through calling out “HEADMAAAGE!”

Straightening up, the Headmaster responded calmly. “Why if it isn't Ortho Shroud of Ignihyde. What could've gotten you in such a tizzy?”

“It's an emergency, sir! About Idia!”

Ortho’s hair swirled erratically, Grim and I were riveted to the spot to hear what could have happened to Idia to get Ortho this worked up.

“Yes, yes, what about your brother?” The Headmaster pressed.

“The thing is… IDIA'S BEEN KIDNAPPED BY GHOSTS!”

“WHAAAAAT?!!” We all yelled in shock.

“Idia has been kidnapped by ghosts?! For how long?” I ask Ortho.

“That's what I'm telling you! Here, I've got some footage to show you. The campus security cameras recorded it last night.”

Headmaster Crowley rose from his chair. “Now, hold on! You can't just hack our security system and access whatever you please!”

“Shh, be quiet! I'm playing it now.” Ortho projected the short film onto the adjacent wall.

A video of Idia walking through a scarcely lit Mainstreet was playing on the wall, complete with audio. With a flick of the Headmaster’s wrists the lights were dimmed.

☆ FOOTAGE START ☆

Idia walked somewhat hunched with his head down as he quietly spoke to himself. “I preordered the latest volume of my favorite manga online, but it didn't come on time! It was the special edition with the autograph card too! So much for my day one nerd cred. Well, no one's out this late. Might as well hit up the school store and pick up a copy—”

“...lly…”

Idia looked up wide eyed, grabbing one side of his headphones. “Huh? Whose there?”

“I’ve finally found you!” The voice called out once again, closer and more clearly.

“MY PRINCE!”

A blue skinned female ghost in old fashioned wedding attire cried out happily, appearing out of left field and giving Idia the fright of his life. Letting out a loud fearful shriek, Idia had no time to process or fight back as the female ghost’s retainers swifty detained him and forcefully dragged him away to a secondary location. All while the bridal ghost wore a bright smile.

☆ FOOTAGE END ☆

We were all left stunned silent, after just witnessing a real life kidnapping.

Grim broke the silence tentatively. “... Was that?...”

“I'm afraid so. Dear, oh dearie me. It would appear the Ghost Bride has found her perfect husband at last!” The Headmaster looked down and shook his head.

“Yer sayin' IDIA'S perfect husband material?! Last I checked, he wasn't like any storybook prince I'd ever seen. He's all slouchy, never leaves his room, he's got that apathetic look goin' on, not to mention his creepy smile... ...Wait a second.” Grim paused his roast.

The Headmaster continued, hand on his chin as he paced. “Tall, nonchalant, "healthy" skin that's never exposed to UV rays, lidded eyes...and I suppose "charming" is ONE way to describe his smile. His hair is literally aflame, so it could be considered bright and shimmering, and blue lips certainly qualify as "arresting." Though an admittedly liberal interpretation, it could be argued he meets the ghost's criteria.”

“Yep, Idia's clearly the coolest guy around. Curse that ghost and her discerning taste!” Ortho smacked his fist on the Headmaster’s desk.

I put my hand on Ortho’s shoulder in an attempt to comfort him at the loss of his brother. Ortho must appreciate the sentiment somewhat as he doesn’t pull away when he notices and places his hand over mine.

Grim in turn shrugged nonchalantly. “I ain’t convinced.”

“Regardless, the situation has taken a rather grave turn. Being chosen by the Ghost Bride means—” Headmaster Crowley was interrupted.

“We’ve got trouble!” Someone called from outside the Headmaster’s office.

“Goodness, just listen to that ruckus outside.” The Headmaster walked to the grand doors and opened them, sticking his head out into the hallway.

‘What is this infernal racket?!”

The Headmaster stepped out as he was greeted to pandemonium. Ghosts and students were scattered all over the place, chased here and there. Fights, yells, and spellcasting and erupting all at once.

“Headmage! Ah, and Thorn and Grim! We got a situation on our hands!” Ace panted.

“Some strange ghosts we've never seen barged into the cafeteria and declared they were turning it into a wedding venue. They tried to take the place over. We fought back of course, but they just revived every time we beat them.” Deuce explained, pointing to the courtyard.

“STOP RIGHT THERE!” A ghost called out soaring up the stairs, chasing after Lilia.

“All I did was tease them a little, and they got all bent out of shape. Those ghosts need a thicker skin.” Lilia complained while laughing.

“Ugh, seriously?! Why'd you Diasomnia guys lead the ghosts in here?” Ace frowned.

“How DARE you take such an aggressive tone with Lilia. If you refuse to learn your place, I'll send you packing!’ Sebek declared fiercely.

Ace, Deuce, Grim, Lilia and Sebek fought the ghosts head on with their magic, even Headmaster Crowley joined in on the fight. Unfortunately, the thing with ghosts is, since they’ve already died, hitting them or dispersing them even with magic, doesn’t keep them down for long. A tremendous amount of magical energy would be needed just to eradicate one ghost, and that simply isn’t feasible for an invasion of this magnitude.

“Heh. How do you like THAT?” Sebek smiled triumphantly, successfully wiping out a wall of ghosts.

Ace turned to Sebek. “Are you seriously stoppin' to gloat?! The next batch of ghosts is already rising up!”

The Headmaster shouted, “there's no end to them. Everyone, fall back and retreat!”

I scooped up Grim as we all charged past the ghosts before they could form their barrier again. Taking refuge in the sportsfield.

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“I don't believe those ghosts will follow us this far out.” The Headmaster said, turning towards the school.

“*huff* *huff* My legs are killing me…” Ace said just as he inelegantly fell to sit on the grass.

Looking around, it looks like everyone else at NRC was forced to take refuge on the sportsfield as well. The ghosts were taking over the entire campus! A small crowd soon made their way towards us.

“Ah, Ace and Deuce. Have you been forced to flee to the sportsfield as well?” Riddle asked rhetorically.

“Greetings to you as well, Thorn. Nice to see you're safe and sound.” Azul smiled, albeit it looked a bit fake.

Playfully I roll my eyes at Azul, “bite me you liar.”

Azul chuckled, “Such baseless accusations. Be careful of what you say, Thorn. that can easily be arranged… For a small price.”

Kalim came bounding over, grabbing onto Azul’s sleeve so as to not slip on the grass. “We were in the auditorium when some ghosts came out of nowhere and chased us out. We were in the middle of studying together, too!”

“What you mean is, YOU were getting help from US, Kalim.” Azul corrected sharply.

“He was so close to figuring out that problem too…” Riddle trailed off, listlessly.

Vil crossed his arms. “We were in a classroom when a bunch of unfamiliar specters told us it was a bridal dressing chamber and locked us out.”

“More's the pity. I would've enjoyed being able to study fashion under Vil's tutelage for longer.” Rook lamented.

“We drove them off several times, but they just kept coming.” Epel slouched.

Cater joined in. “Yeah, they kicked me out of the lab. They were all like, "stay out of the family lounge!"

“You think that's bad? I was just walking down the hall, minding my own business, when these ghosts got all up in my face.” Leona grumbled, still clearly ticked.

“Looks like this is everyone who got booted from the main building.” Grim said.

“It sounds like the whole building's been seized by those white-uniformed ghosts.” Deuce added on.

“What in the world's goin' on, Headmage?!” Ace demanded.

Ortho answered in his steed. “Allow me to explain. It all started last night, with my brother…”

After Ortho’s retelling of his brother’s kidnapping, Riddle was the first to speak.

“Now I see. Idia happens to be the perfect prince the Ghost Bride's been searching for. That's the general idea, yes?”

The field of NRC students couldn’t keep it together anymore. “*snrk* AAAH HA HA HA HA HA!”

“Idia, the perfect prince? BWAH HA HA! You're kidding, right?” Ace clutched his stomach from laughing so hard.

“Bridey sure knows how to pick 'em!” Cater wiped a tear from his eye.

“Of all the times for Idia to choose to emerge from his cave. Hilariou—I mean, how unfortunate for him.” Azul masked his laughter in faux sympathy.

The Headmaster cut in everyone’s merriment sternly. “This is no laughing matter! I can only assume none of you know what happens when you're the Ghost Bride's groom.”

“What's the matter, Headmage? That's quite the scowl you got there.” Deuce pointed out.

The Headmaster elaborated. “To marry a ghost means that you bind yourself to someone who's already dead. Hence, if Idia marries her… His soul will leave his body, and he will depart for the afterlife!”

The whole group erupted in a chorus of “WHAAAAAT?!”

“I foolishly assumed that the bride's standards were so unrealistic she'd never find anyone, so I wrote the whole thing off as a non-issue.” The Headmaster admitted.

“My... My brother's gonna turn into a ghost?!” Ortho went pale, if that was even possible. “We can't let that happen! Please, Headmage, you have to save Idia!” Ortho cried out.

“But of course. With a peer's life at stake, I'm sure all of the kind souls here would be more than glad to lend their aid—”

Headmaster Crowley was interrupted from the group’s unison “nah.”

“Oh, so, NOW you can all agree on something?” I semi whisper.

“But why?! You could all help!” Ortho turned to the group.

“He snubs the company of others, yet we're supposed to fly to his rescue? I see no reason to indulge such selfish behavior.” Vil said.

“This is your bro's problem, not ours. Figure it out yourself.” Leona stretched boredly.

“..Okay, fine. I can handle it, sure.” Ortho turned to face the college.

“Hey, wait. You can't possibly think you can do this alone—” Kalim was tuned out by Ortho’s volume of speech.

“Running simulation of Idia Shroud rescue mission. Priority: Shortest time to achieve objective. Simulation completed successfully. Commencing live operation. Charging technomantic energy. Target: Night Raven College, main building. Technomantic beam firing in five, four, three, two…”

Headmaster Crowley jumped in front of Ortho’s path. “STOOOP! Were you truly about to vaporize our historic building?! I forbid you from firing that beam!”

“Look, if no one's going to help, then I don't have any other option!” Ortho stated firmly.

“Ortho I’ll help you get your brother back. I’ve thought of a few plans.” I smile reassuringly.

Ortho runs up to me and wraps his arms around my torso, “thank you Thorn.” He says quietly. Unsure of what to do I wrap one arm around Ortho and rub his back, waiting until he lets go first.

‘I understand the guys’ outright refusal to help Idia. NRC students can be, for lack of a better phrasing, a bit of a bastard. But Ortho is so sweet, how can I say no to him? And Idia is sorta my bastard friend.’ I think as the scene plays out.

Headmaster Crowley stepped in. “As for the rest of you—are you absolutely certain you wish to stick with your initial answer? Because if you actually abandon Idia to his fate…”

Ace tried shutting the Headmaster down. “So what if we do? Don't bother threatenin' me, 'cuz—”

"Why look! There's a Night Raven College student now!" The Headmaster pitched his voice and took out a wild looking camera, almost as ancient looking as the ghost camera he saddled me with.

“Huh? What're you doing?” Ace backed up a bit, flustered at the sudden change in behavior in the Headmaster.

"Hello there, I'm a reporter with TBC News! You attend Night Raven College, correct?" Headmaster Crowley shoved a pencil in Ace’s face as a makeshift microphone.

“Uh, yeah... I guess? Whoa, geez, ever hear of personal space, Headmage?!”

"Is it true that ghosts took over your campus? Give us an honest answer!" "Oh, by the way, this is going to be in tomorrow morning's edition. Here, let's get a picture for the article!" *snap!* *snap!*”

“Ack! That flash is making me see stars!” Ace blinked and rubbed his eyes.

"A student was kidnapped as well, yes? And you abandoned him when he needed you most, isn't that right?"

“Look, man, I don't know what to tell you! I'm not even in his dorm!”

"So you deserted him just because you weren't close? How utterly ruthless!"
"This deserves a special feature! Sage's Island Rocked by Horrific Betrayal at Prestigious Academy!"

“Dude, cut it out! Stop pointin' that camera at me!”

*Snap* SNAP snap SNAP snap *snap!*

“QUIT IT!” Ace snapped and pushed the blinding camera down.

‘I suspect the Headmaster has experience in dealing with nosey reporters. That was pretty spot on.’ I think to myself.

The Headmaster straightened up and returned to his normal mannerism. “If Shroud never returns, I can assure you the press will be crawling all over our campus day and night, hounding you with questions. I, being the considerate person I am, have no desire to see my students run ragged with fear and anxiety.”

Ortho let go of me and directed his frustrations at Ace. “If you won't help, I'll hack the TV stations and remove any censoring from your faces on TV. And I'll make sure to add a sticker that reads: "Backstabbing student"!”

I widened my eyes, ‘Ortho can be quite ruthless. That’s the Idia internet troll effect no doubt.’

“My, the apple doesn't fall far from the twisted tree.” Azul remarked.

“I suspect the Headmage would be held responsible if a scandal broke out. He'd have the most to lose.’ Riddle said what everyone was thinking.

“But it'd still be bad for us. My mom would cry if she saw me on the news like that.” Deuce added.

Vil agreed. “The tabloids would have a field day, ripping my image to shreds. Unacceptable on all levels.”

“Looks like they've forced us to lend a helping hand. I won't stand for any allegations that claim Briar Valley's heir apparent failed to save a single child of man.” Lilia said resolutely.

“You’re absolutely right, Lilia!” Sebek looked proudly at Lilia.

“Then I believe we've reached a consensus! We'll all work together to rescue poor Shroud from the Ghost Bride! Ahhh, how fortunate I am to have such a kindhearted student body!” The Headmaster said with a large grin.

“That’s the fakest smile I’ve ever seen!” Grim exclaimed.

Ortho faced the group once more, “let’s brainstorm how we’re going to save my brother!”

Kalim was the first to speak up. “What if we try talking things out with the bride? We could even do it over a dinner party! Maybe she'll let Idia go if we just explain the issue.”

Rook placed a hand on Kalim’s shoulder, “a lovely proposal, Roi Doré.
Though there's one troubling detail: Would a bride who's spent so long seeking her groom be willing to relinquish him? Were it myself, I would never let my dear beloved go.”

I interject, “I’ve thought of something similar to that effect, Kalim. Bear with me, I could act as Idia’s betrothed, and demand my finance returned to me. As a ‘fellow princess’, I could use her social standing and delusions against herself. Who wants to marry an unfaithful man, or stir up international politics, or wear the title of homewrecker?”

The group mulled over my idea, some wearing a look of disbelief (mainly the first years) a few laughs were masked by coughs, until Cater spoke out.

“How are you going to accomplish that, Thorny? You don’t exactly look or act or have the air of a princess.”

“I have experience in theater acting, I’ll just channel my inner Leona, and I’ll just fix my makeup and hair.” I grinned.

A few snickers were let out on the field at my comment.

Leona’s ear flicked in annoyance. “Oi, watch it herbivore.”

“I just mean when you put your mind to it Leona, you can do anything.” I say grinning at Leona.

“You’re a bad liar herbivore.” Leona growled out, but there was no malice behind it.

I approached Pomefiore’s trio, “I know you Pomefiore students carry makeup on you, now brush me!” I stuck my handout, awaiting a makeup bag to be placed in it, instead Epel started brushing my hair with his hand.

“Not what I meant, pomme de terre.” I try my best not to laugh.

Vil peered at me for a long time, I was afraid he was going to dismiss the whole idea until Rook chimed in.

“Oh me oh my! Trickster, you really have outdone yourself this time, the flare of determination you possess, the fiery passion of a royal love triangle! This could work!” Rook’s eyes shined as he grabbed my shoulders.

Pulling out his makeup bag, Vil commented, “alright spudling, I’ll be the one to do your hair and makeup and ensure it is up to royal standards.”

Vil got to work straight away in preparing his canvas for his masterpiece.

“Well then I guess violence is our only option.” Leona said, a smirk threatening to grace his features as he cracked his knuckles.

Vil rolled his eyes and turned sharply to Leona. “No, that's the problem. We already tried duking it out, and where did it get us? Here, in this field, that's where.”

“Precisely. These ghosts cannot be defeated with a mere fight. Things would be exceedingly troublesome if we got on their bad side. We should consider combat only as a last resort.” Headmaster Crowley added, looking off solemnly at his once prestigious academy turned undead wedding suite.

“Ghosts, hmm...Young Sam is quite the authority on all that's creepy and crawly, you know. What if we sought his expertise?” Lilia mused.

A look of puzzlement washed over Deuce’s face. "Young Sam"? Do you mean Sam, the guy running the school store?”

Lilia hummed. “Mhmm. I'm acquainted with his great-great-grandfather.”

“You sure love dropping hot goss on us, huh, Lilia? And with no hint if you're being for real or not.” Cater awkwardly chuckled.

Rook walked behind Vil to watch his skills at work and asked, “ah, Trickster, a princess will definitely need retainers, have you decided upon who your knights in shining armor could be?”

Without missing a beat I answered “Deuce and Riddle if possible.”

Deuce and Ace squawked,

“Why me?”
“Why not me?”

I answered, “I think their unique magic, ability to work together, as well as follow a plan would be the most beneficial. They’re very reliable and dependable in short.”

“Of course a natural conclusion.” Riddle not so humbly bragged.

Once Vil had put the finishing touches on, he spun me around to face the group. Wide eyes and a few gasps were let out, stunned silence followed. Did I really look so strange?

Ortho approached us, “Vil-senpai, your work is outstanding! After running a diagnostic scan and cross referencing, this plan’s level to succeed has gone up 70%!”

Vil handed me a mirror so that I could admire his work as well, more comments flooded in.

“Haha, Thorn you look so cute with makeup and a new hairstyle, you should wear makeup more often!” Kalim complimented.

“Thorn really does look like a girl like this…” Azul murmured, a faint blush tinting his cheeks.

“Welcome to the club.” Epel looked at me in sympathy.

“Vil’s skills know no bounds, amazing as always Roi du Poison. And you as well Trickster, Vil was able to draw out your otherworldly beauté.” Rook fanboyed.

Deuce and Ace were too stunned to speak for different reasons; Deuce’s inability to talk to women and Ace could not come up with any quips.

“Hmmp! This foolhardy plan isn’t going to work. This isn’t a novel.” Sebek chastised, yet was unable to meet my gaze.

“And you don’t read enough Sebek.” I playfully jabbed.

“Myahh? Hey whaddya do with my henchman?” Grim walked up to Vil and I.

“It’s still me, you little fool.” I tease Grim as I scratch behind his ear.

“You clean up nice, herbivore.” Leona gave a smirk.

Cater joined in, “Thorny you look totes adorbs, selfie time!” Pulling out his phone, Cater put his arm around me, and for once I let ‘@ caterd.updates’ take a clear smiling photo of me. Cater captioned the photo: ‘Ghost have taken over the school, but hope is not lost with @ alienprotag shining through! # NRC’s secret princess # Totes adorbs’

“You look… You look good.” Riddle said awkwardly.

“Fufufu, you’re quite the charmer little bat.” Lilia playfully winked.

It was my turn to blush from all the attention. “Thank you everyone. And thanks Vil for your expertise, I wouldn't have been able to pull off such a complicated look.”

Vil had styled my hair in a curled updo set with a braid that wrapped around the crown of the bun, delicate pieces of hair framed my face, paired with small pearl accessories throughout. My makeup looked minimal and effortless, with the appearance of looking barefaced and with subtle tints of blush and color to my lips. My eyelashes were slightly darkened to create length, and all of my tiny imperfections were covered. (Think Regency era or Pride & Prejudice.)

Vil met my gaze, “it’s not all thanks to me Thorn, as Rook said, I simply accentuated what was already there.”

“Ah, my little raven grows up so fast.” Headmaster Crowley mimed wiping off a tear. “Spade, Rosehearts, escort Silvanus back to ramshackle posthaste! Everyone else, follow me to the school’s store!”

As I turned to leave the field with my escorts, Grim shimmied up the side of me and rested on my shoulder.

"Eh? Grim?" Deuce said in surprise.

"Let's go henchman! Diddya think the great Grim would leave you on your own to save *our* home?" Grim smirked.

I sigh as I pull Grim off my shoulder, "Grimmy, I think it be best if the least amount of people went. Plus, who will keep Ace in check? You're needed here."

'That's partially the truth. The silent subtext of 'you'd mess up the mission' was not lost on everyone sans Grim. But, since these are old fashioned ghosts, they may not be so friendly with an animal, even if he is a pet or a familiar.'

Ace swiftly scooped Grim out of my hold. Grim frowned, crossing his arms. "Bossy meanie pants! Fine! I didn't even wanna anyways!"

☆ Mr. S’s Mystery Shop ☆

The group dashed on the cobblestone path, their heels clicking up a racket.
Once inside the shop, Mr. S spun around in novel fashion. “Well, if it isn't the Headmage with a merry band of imps in tow! What brings you to my humble store today? I kid, I kid. I already know. You're dealing with the Ghost Bride, aren't ya?”

“You're one step ahead of us, it seems. Almost like you knew we'd be coming.” Azul thought out loud.

“Neh heh heh. My friends in the shadows keep me well-informed. It is quite the conundrum, though. Ghosts are beings who are trapped in this world because of powerful, lingering attachments. You can make them go poof for a short while with magic, but they'll always come back. There's no sending them on to the hereafter as long as their attachment remains unresolved.” Mr. S expertly explained.

“Ohhh, so that's why those ghosts in Ramshackle just kept comin' back every time we clobbered 'em.” Grim said.

Mr. S snapped his fingers, “exactamundo! Ghosts can be tricky customers.”

Ushered deeper into the shop, Ortho pressed for more info. “So, how do we save Idia? It's not like I can expect some item that magically solves our problem to be—”

“—IN STOCK!” Mr. S interrupted, grabbing a dark black box.

“Wait, you got something?” Leona’s eyes widened in disbelief.

“Your selection of wares never ceases to amaze.” Azul said, examining the shop’s knickknacks.

“Tragic brides have existed for eons. They develop lingering attachments and stick around as ghosts all the time! Lots of ghost brides means lots of people suffering, which also means there are a lot of anti-ghost bride items in the world. Here's your ticket to expelling the Ghost Bride—the Circle of Severance.” Mr. S opened the box to reveal a white gold pristine wedding band with two small dark colored jewels in the center. “Put the ring on the ghost's left ring finger after saying this incantation: "I vow to love you for as long as you live." The ring will then sever the ghost's lingering attachment and send her on to the afterlife!” Mr. S said, snapping the lid shut once more.

“Ah, so it sets up an escape clause: "No promises once you're dead." Lilia said with a sly glint in his eyes.

“What a messed up ring!” Grim shook his head.

“Hey, I'm just the supplier. You imps are the ones with the demand.” Mr. S said, raising his hands up in defense.

Vil crossed his arms. “But this begs the question of how we're supposed to get that ring on the ghost's finger?”

Rook piped up. “Couldn't we simply give it to her as a gift? As a token of our heartfelt regard, perhaps?”

“It would only frighten her if a man she didn't know waltzed up and gifted her a ring—and with good reason. Not to mention trying to put it on her left ring finger. No woman alive OR dead would permit that.” Vil elaborated.

“Her soon-to-be hubby Idia could probably get away with it, but he's already being held captive.” Cater remarked.

“Then we must become worthy of bestowing a ring upon her.” Azul announced.

Ace questioned, “and how would we do that?”

“By becoming her fiancé. After all, a fiancé would be expected to place an engagement ring on his bride's finger.” Azul pushed up his glasses.

Ace continued to interject. “But the bride's already picked Idia. She's not exactly taking applications.”

Lilia chimed in. “Ah! You're suggesting someone steal her affections! Khee hee hee. Stealing a bride wounds delightfully dramatic and intriguing. Perhaps Thorn has already done so with a different method.”

“Ask for the Ghost Bride's hand. Put the ring on her finger. Retrieve Shroud. I dub this scheme: Operation Proposal! We've established our mission. Now, who will most likely ensure its success? ...Ah, but of course–” The Headmaster was interrupted by a loud *BANG*

Deuce and Riddle threw open Mr. S’s door with a slam, and in unison yelled to the group, “THE GHOST BRIDE KIDNAPPED THORN FOR MARRIAGE TOO!”

A series of “HAAAA?! And “WHAT’S?!” rang out through the shop.

“Plan failed successfully?” Deuce half-heartedly said.

“Wrong! Did ya forget that Thorn was suppose ta retrieve Idia, not join ‘im!” Caught off guard at the startling news, Epel’s accent slipped out.

☆ FLASHBACK THORN’S MISSION ☆

Sneaking back to the heavily ghost guarded school was no walk in the park. Between Deuce silently staring at me and refusing to speak, and Riddle’s reservations about the plan working and about my safety were both equally unhelpful in my opinion. After some time, ducking into bushes, scaling fences, and throwing rocks and cans to distract the guards, I, the fake royal, and my loyal retainers made it back to ramshackle.

“Are you sure about this Thorn? There’s no shame in turning back now.” Riddle whispered to me, as we hid in our bush hideout watching the gates of ramshackle.

“Yes there is. Riddle, it’ll be alright, I suggested it so I must have some reasonable ability to carry out what I set out to do, don’t you trust me?” I paused and looked into Riddle’s light colored eyes before continuing, “plus that’s why you and Deuce are here to ensure nothing horrible befalls me, right?”

“It’s not a matter of trust, I do have faith in you, I just worry about what could go wrong. You are magicless after all, and I don’t want to see you get hurt, even if it’s temporary.” Riddle looked down.

Deuce was nodding his head up and down in earnest, still unable to talk in my presence.

“We’ve already experienced the worst, the ghosts will simply chase us out again. Just stand two steps behind me and follow my lead, you don’t even have to talk if you don’t want to.” I smile at the duo in an attempt to reassure them.

Rising up from our hideout, we walk casually and proudly to the gates of Ramshackle.

“Halt trespassers! No outsiders are permitted to enter this area! This area has been sanctioned for our dear princess’s upcoming marriage!”

Before the ghost soldier can continue I raise a hand to stop his ramblings and surprisingly he does.

“Pardon me good sir, but I fear there has been a terrible mix up that I have come to rectify. My betrothed has been selected by your dear princess and I have come to reclaim him. I understand the princess is quite taken with him and his charms, as am I. From one princess to another I am willing to sweep the whole incident under the rug, for I am magnanimous and give my blessing for the princess to continue using my humble abode to further her search for her true love. And of course I would prevent any regional drama from brewing due to this incident as well.”

The ghost soldier looked thoughtful, carefully mulling over my words.

‘He’s buying it!’ I internally cheer.

After much deliberation the ghost says, “prove it.”

‘He’s not buying it!’ I internally scream.

I can tell Deuce and Riddle have become antsy, as I hear their feet shift behind me.

“Might one be more specific in what one needs clarification on?” I hold my head high and give the ghost a stern look daring him to press for more.

Behind him, the ghost bride herself appears. Informed of the intruders no doubt, and has floated over to see the commotion. A vision in blue and white, her skin, lips, and eyes were ethereal shades of blue. Her wedding dress was conservative and modest sans the bodice exposing her ribcage, her thick veil trailed after her affixed with light blue roses upon her head, furthermore her satin white gloves showed wear and tear around the upper arms.

The ghost soldier stands aside and bows before the ghost bride, a “princess Eliza” was quickly ushered out and she explains, “I’m interested too in what you’ll say to prove that my sweetie pie is as you claim your intended.”

“Greetings your highness.” I begin, doing a small curtsey. “The man you have apprehended is already engaged to me, we wish to spend the rest of our lives together in laughter and in hardship. The bond we share is more than fate, more than heaven and the stars have allowed, our love is intentional. We’ve seen one another at our highest and lowest and still cannot find faults within the other person. He completes me, as I do him, like matching gloves, or turtle doves we’re a set pair. Can’t you see? You’re going to sever our happy beginning before it can even start, from one princess to another, please return him to me, so that we may live our lives in love.”

The ghost bride was clutching her pearls, the ghost soldier and other ghosts who had gathered around were sniffling at my heartfelt confession. Riddle and Deuce were stunned silent.

The bride grabbed my hands and spoke. “I thought what you said makes all the sense in the world. You truly love and care for this man don’t you? And I was going to take away your happily ever after, you’re right this must be rectified! That is why I am proposing to you! Join us in holy matrimony for the rest of your lives and afterlife, it's a win-win!” The ghost bride continued, “don’t worry we’re princesses, we can get away with bending a few rules, teehee!” Pulling my hands she was leading me to a secondary location while two soldiers flanked my sides.

Riddle and Deuce, once no longer stunned, looked like they were going to blow a gasket!

I call out from over my shoulder, “retainers, see to it that the proper channels are properly informed!”

Riddle and Deuce nodded, and ran back to the meetup location, the ghosts allowing them to leave.

The ghost bride agreed wholeheartedly with what I said, giddy in love and rubbing her cheek against mine.

‘I’m in over my head.’ I thought as I fake smile and laughed with the bride.

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

Chapter Text

The Phantom Bride

Love At First Fright

Part 2

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

The group returned to the sportsfield, some more fired up than others to prevent the ghost bride from succeeding in her plans now that Thorn was thrown into the mix. Headmaster Crowley had devised a sure-fire plan, if he did say so himself. Pacing back and forth, the Headmaster addressed the seven students he had requested.

“Roll call: Clover, Howl, Jade and Floyd Leech, Kingscholar, Schoenheit, and Zigvolt.”

Vil spoke up. “Headmage, may I ask what you want with the seven of us?”

Headmaster Crowley spun on his heel, “I want you to ask for the ghost bride’s hand in marriage.”

“Scuse me? What are you on about?” Jack couldn’t help but inquire.

Riddle joined the line up and stood next to Floyd. “Pardon me. It would be a dereliction of my duty to dispatch my vice housewarden while I sit on the sidelines. Allow me to join them, Headmage!”

In faux sympathy the Headmaster explained, “unfortunately, I cannot Rosehearts.”

“Whyever not?” Riddle crossed his arms, as he had a one-sided stare down with the Headmaster.

“You must ask what these seven students have in common.” The Headmaster began to pace again. “The answer is simple...THEY'RE ALL OVER 180 CENTIMETERS TALL.” Headmaster Crowley exclaimed, facing the group in exaggerated fashion.

“...Excuse me Headmage, Thorn passed the ghost bride’s qualifications and they’re not over 180cm… Are you calling me SHORT?!” Riddle was simmering now, pretty soon he’d be turning red.

“Ah, Silvanus has a charm all their own, a feather off the old wing.” Headmaster Crowley cheerfully bragged.

“WHAT?! THE PREFECT HAS BEEN ABDUCTED FOR MARRIAGE?!” Sebek’s volume drowned out everyone else’s objections and shock.

“This seems out of character for someone looking for their ‘true love’, not true loves.” Jack muttered, ear twitching.

“THAT PREFECT IS UNSUITABLE FOR SUCH A UNION. THIS GHOST BRIDE MUST BE DELUSIONAL AND AN ILL JUDGE OF CHARACTER.”

“Whose side are you on?” Trey asked, eye twitching from Sebek’s outburst.

“Hmm… The Ramshackle prefect does possess a majority of the qualities the ghost bride has sought out, if we take liberal interpretations… And acknowledge as Zigvolt has suggested, is delusional.” Jade surmised with a smile.

“Although Thorn does not match the bride’s preferred height, thanks to my makeup artistry Thorn’s complexion matches the requirements: healthy and lustrous skin, bright shimmering hair, and kissable lips.”

Met with a few eyebrow raises, Vil tells them to check out Cater’s magicam, after which some (@ shiiok.ing, @ whimsqueeze, @ riddle.rule025, and @ experimentswclover) took the liberty to save such a photo.

“And they have a charming smile…” Sebek semi-whispered to himself.

Floyd, bored of all the talking, started teasing goldfishie. “Hahaha, oh man, you can't reach the "You must be this tall" sign? Wanna stand on my tailfin? Might give you some extra height.”

“Not in the least.” Riddle swiftly answers. “She's choosing a husband based on height. So, she'd prefer a slippery scoundrel like Floyd because he happens to be tall? That's ridiculous.”

“Now, now, Riddle. Everyone has their quirks.” Trey attempts to soothe Riddle.

“Yes, I know, there's no accounting for taste.” Riddle flippantly says.

“That's the spirit! Besides, bein' small's got its own charm... Wait. Where's Goldfishie? Did he just disappear?” Floyd mimes searching for goldfishie.

“What are you talking about, Floyd? I'm right—”

“Oh, THERE you are! I couldn't see you from up here!” Floyd mocks, lowering himself to Riddle’s height.

Riddle was quickly held back by Trey as he turned red and let out a battle cry: “YEEEAAARGH!”

“Riddle, he's just goading you again.” Trey says avoiding Riddle’s flailing limbs.

Headmaster Crowley took it upon himself to interrupt… Whatever had just transpired and get team ‘over 180cm’ back on track.

“The Ghost Bride has spent years searching for her perfect companion. She'll be unwilling to compromise. She seeks a myriad of qualities in a groom, from a particular countenance to physique...but most of those qualities are vague at best. Although I do not encourage or endorse what my little sparrow has done, they were miraculously an exception. However, the one quality that is unambiguous is height. As much as I applaud your dedication, Rosehearts, I must ask you to defer this job to ensure a successful operation.”

“Doesn't Malleus also meet the height requirement? Why have you not called him?” Vil scrutinized.

Lilia answered before the Headmage could. “It is true Malleus is a literal prince. Were he to propose, I'm sure she would welcome him with open arms. But it wouldn't do for Briar Valley's heir apparent to propose to a random ghost, even if—nay, ESPECIALLY IF—that proposal is a lie. Simply proposing could set off an international incident. Sebek's offering his services in Malleus's stead.”

“I could ask for no greater honor than to act on our lord's behalf!” Sebek proudly saluted.

“Hmph. Whatever. You got no clue if she'd choose Malleus.” Leona said, side eyeing Sebek.

Sebek was not deterred in the slightest. “Heh. Malleus possesses a singular beauty. If he were here, he'd be selected as a matter of course! THE REST OF YOU ARE BUT SPECKS OF DUST ON HIS IMMACULATE BOOTS!”

“Hah. What a mouth.” Leona rubbed his head in annoyance.

“Please. You're all a bunch of unwashed, over ripened vegetables.” Vil rolled his eyes.

“Who needs Malleus when I'm on the job?” Leona smugly boasted.

“It might be an impossible task for most, but for me?” Vil smirked.

“Operation Proposal is as good as done.” Vil and Leona simultaneously said.

“Marvelous! It's wonderful to see two housewardens so eager to step up.” Headmaster Crowley remarked.

“I'll put up the surveillance feeds so that the rest of us can monitor your progress.” Ortho added.

“Oi wait a minute.” Floyd interrupted. “Doesn't this mean that Firefly-squid is getting two spouses?”

The atmosphere on the field shifted. Everyone had become determined to ensure Idia did not acquire a harem and get with Thorn.

“I'm positively certain she'll choose Vil! You couldn't find a fairer groom, even if you tried. Wouldn't you agree, Epel?” Rook nudged Epel.

“Huh? Oh, uhh… (If I had to propose to a lady all fancy-like and spout a buncha sappy lines, I'd cringe so hard my soul'd leave my body…) But I'm sure Vil can pull it off!” Epel not so subtlety murmured.

“I heard all of that, you know.” Vil said, casting a stern look to Epel.

“We'll make sure to catch every moment of your shining beauté!” Rook declared.

☆ CAFETERIA ☆

With Eliza holding my arm in a vice grip, we entered the cafeteria turned wedding venue. Candelabras, shimmering white tablecloths, elegant headstone chairs, streamers that hung in the shape of ghosts and a myriad of ghosts were now occupying the space. As I took in the eerie sight, something had occurred to me.

‘Her name is Eliza, probably short for Elizabeth… Is this just Master Gracey in reverse? I REALLY WAS LIVING IN EDDIE’S HAUNTED MANSION?!’

“Tee hee hee... Ooh, what a lovely day this is! I haven't felt so alive since...well, when I was alive! Finally, at long last… I've found you, my perfect prince! And my perfect princess!” Eliza happily chattered, ushering me to stand beside a squirming Idia.

“SOMEBODY, GET ME OUT OF HEEERE! (wait) AND PRINCESS?!” Idia quelled his panic to look Thorn up and down, secretly admiring their SSR face card.

With the tips of his hair turning pink he grumbled, “Ugh great, now the noob is here and we’re becoming collector’s edition spouses.” But he digresses. “First, a bunch of ghosts surround me out of nowhere, then they tie me up, and now I'm being forced into MARRIAGE? I don't WANNA get married! I'm still in school!”

Princess Eliza interrupts Idia’s negative comments, “I thought it only be right to reunite you with your darling betrothed so that we may all be happy together. I won’t separate you two, but I love both of your personalities, we complete each other, the perfect set, don’t you agree? Since we’re both princesses we can bend the rules, remember? Teeheehee!”

Idia, at the sound of Eliza’s implications, started sputtering with his hair shooting up wildly.

“GAHHHHH! What is my LIFE?! The first time I leave my room I get turned into some sort of D-list anime protag beginning his quest of acquiring a sizable harem he doesn’t want!”

“Idia, remember “365 Days to the Wedding” I stare into Idia’s eyes, trying to telepathically make him understand my anime code.

Idia, although looking frantic and that he’d rather crawl under a rock and die, nods his ever glowing pink head. Although I had not watched the anime I had a suspicion that Idia probably had, from what I gathered from the synopsis, it's about two introverts who don’t know one another very well that work for the same company that need to tie the knot to avoid getting drafted to their company’s secondary location in Alaska; to be staffed by single workers.

An older, gentle looking female ghost floated next to Eliza. “Oh, Princess Eliza, you've finally found your soulmate! I know it's been your dream to marry a perfect prince ever since you were a wee girl. Yet you were robbed of both that dream and your life. Fate can be too cruel! If only I'd gotten to your room sooner, you'd have made it out alive…”

“Silly Nana, are you dwelling on the past again? Come, don't let ancient history bring you down! All my suffering and sorrow was for a purpose, in the end. I never would've met my darlings Idia and Thorn otherwise!” Eliza beamed.

“What a positive outlook you have, my lady!” Nana wiped her tears in a silky beige handkerchief.

Somewhat calmer, Idia asked, “okay, let's pump the brakes for a second. I don't wanna be that guy but don't I get a say in this?!”

A new ghost attendant barreled in. “You ungrateful lout. You should be ecstatic to have the honor of marrying Her Highness!”

Idia’s eyebrow went up at that audacious claim. ‘Ecstatic? Is that the normal reaction with people who are forced to marry a ghost?!”

“You have no idea, do you? No idea how marvelous it will be to spend eternity with our sweet, innocent princess…” The male ghost sorrowfully lamented.

“Oh dear, are you two quarreling? Puffy, don't be so mean to my darling Idia!
He's going to be my hubby quite soon, after all.” Princess Eliza sweetly admonished.

“Of course, Your Highness. My apologies.” Puffy looked down in a deep bow.

A boney, taller ghost came flying through the doors. “Princess! There's trouble afoot!”
.
“What's gotten you into such a lather, Grampy?” Princess Eliza asked.

“We've had a report from the gatekeepers. Suitors are showing up in droves to ask for Your Highness's hand in marriage!”

“SUITORS?!” The entire cafeteria erupted.

“Just so. They're all students of Night Raven College, same as Mr. Idia and Miss. Thorn.” Grampy explained.

Idia took his chance. “This is mondo confusing. But I'll take any chance I can to get us out of here. Whee hee hee. Just so you know, all the students at Night Raven College are eligible bachelors. Like, turbo eligible. Rich boys, preppy boys, bossy boys, cute boys, pretentious boys—you name it, they've got it! I'm like, the bottom of the barrel compared to them. And since Thorn and I are a 2 for 1 special, you won’t need to marry them anymore either.”

I turned to Idia with a shocked expression. ‘Wait does Idia not know what it means to marry a ghost? If not I won’t be the one to break it to him, and if he does know that’s just straight up savage! Cold blooded!’

“It's all right, sweetie.” Eliza cuts in. "It doesn't matter who comes calling. I'll turn down every one of them. You just relax and wait right here.”

“YOU DIDN'T LISTEN TO A WORD I SAID!” Idia exploded.

“Nana, Grampy. Get my sweet Idia and Thorn ready while I tend to the suitors.” Eliza began to float towards the cafeteria doors.

“Yes, Your Highness!”

“What do you mean, "ready"? Ready for what?! FOR WHAT?!” Idia shrieked.

“I'm looking forward to a most delightful and memorable first look.” The ghost bride winked.

“Consider it done. We'll put our skills to the test and turn Idia into the finest of grooms! And Thorn into an equally handsome bride!”

The ghosts began to ominously crowd Idia and I.

“Eep! Don't you come any closer! Ah... AAAAAH!” Idia screamed.

“HEY! Watch where you put your hands! I can walk on my own!” I yelled out.

Idia was led into one room with grampy, nana, and a gaggle of ghosts while I was taken to another room with what I could only assume was a herd of seamstresses.

My words of bartering Idia and I’s freedom fell on deaf ears as they made quick work of taking my measurements and searching for suitable materials to create my attire. I decided to quietly comply since the ‘suitors’ would succeed, probably.

“Now don’t you worry, you’ll be just as beautiful as our sweet princess.” A tall and pale ghost said as she brushed my hair into a low bun to accommodate my veil.

Another ghost entered the room, holding some shimmering tablecloths. “Make no mistake, we wouldn’t wish to insult you with rags, these fabrics are worth quite the pretty thaumark and are the only white material we can spare on such short notice.”

Having no choice, afraid that all the ghosts may possess Eliza’s freezing slap, I raised my arms as the seamstresses worked their magic. Tall and pale reapplied my makeup in a rosier color palette. Multiple ghosts fussed over me for what felt like *hours* but eventually they dispersed, allowing me to admire their work in a floor length mirror.

My outfit mimicked Eliza’s in a variety of ways, but had its own distinctions. My dress’s length came to rest above my knees and puffed out, my bodice was sweetheart in shape with puffy short sleeves and long satin gloves to accompany it, although unlike Eliza’s my clavicle and neck were on display. (Dress) The ghost attendant fixed my spider web veil atop of my crown. Small crystals emulated dew drops balancing on the pattern. (Veil) I was given a white lily bracelet and white short heels to complete the look. I had mixed emotions seeing myself in the full-length mirror. I was stunning, of course, and the ghosts agreed if their coos and awes were anything to go by, but my anxiety was going up.

Suddenly the promise of death seemed much closer. I had to do something, I thought I could wait it out but the stillness of the dead did nothing to ease my thoughts. ‘What happens if all the rescue teams fail? I’ve been added to the mix, I can’t guarantee the story will play out the same.’ To quell my anxious thoughts I shut them down by doing something constructive, whining and begging to be permitted to see my future bride. I figured if I was annoying enough the ghost attendants would set me ‘free’ and then I’d be able to help the suitors take down the phantom bride. Some of the ghosts started to cover their ears! It’s working! Time to bring out the big guns: threatening to cry and ruin the time they’ve spent on my appearance. A series of begging and no’s erupted from the ghosts. 😈

☆ WITH IDIA ☆

Idia was stressing to the MAX. Once locked inside a random classroom, he was running, leaping and evading the ghosts at every turn while simultaneously yelling “I DON'T WANNA DIE! Somebody, help! These ghosts are gonna kill me!”

The ghosts were beside themselves with the fuss Idia was causing that they urged the princess to see the state of her hubby; in short ‘control your man.’

The phantom bride soundlessly floated in. “Now, now, darling. Thrashing about will only make Nana and Grampy's job that much harder. I know you're shy, but I can't stay here with you forever. I have to send my other suitors away.” The phantom bride’s smile threatened to fall as her patience with her groom’s squirming ‘bashfulness’ was not relenting. “Fine, I suppose I must... Just sit still for a little while, darling.” She approached Idia with one finger.

Iida blinked, movements ceased. “Huh? You poked my forehead, and now I can't move?! What kind of technology IS that?! It's uber-creepy!”

“There we go. Nana, Grampy, he's all yours!” Eliza waved as she floated to her next matter.

“We'll have him dressed to the nines! See you soon, Your Highness!” Nana and Grampy sang with an affectionate wave.

Iida’s face flinched. “Hold up, did you say DRESSED? Are you seriously gonna dress me as...?”

“That's right. We'll make you look a proper groom.” Grampy beamed

“I'm headed to like the worst of all possible bad endings! How did I end up in this story branch in the first place?!” Idia yelled.

“You don't have to look so dour. Do you doubt our skill as attendants?” Nana chimed.

Idia huffed. “Who cares about your skill? Are you just gonna ignore the fact that I don't WANT to marry the ghost lady?”

“Oh, pipe down!” Nana dismissed with a wave of her brush.

“Better get this done quick. Here goes!” Grampy dove straight for Idia, tux in hand.

Idia’s face twisted in torment as all he could do was yell. “GYAAAH!”

After a long stretch of time, applying makeup to a constantly moving face is no easy matter, Idia had been ‘groomified.’

“I say, I think we've outdone ourselves! We've maintained the elegant design of the coat that the princess's father wore to his own wedding… And turned it into a brand new suit, tailored with material befitting Idia's aesthetic!” Grampy smiled.

“It's so true that trends always come back around. This classic look feels fresh somehow! Ahh, just seeing it reminds me of how the king and queen used to smile back in the old days. I remember it like it was yesterday… I'm sure the princess will just love it!’ Nana tried to keep her tears at bay.

Idia lashed out from the onlookers. “NO! I can't let other people see me dressed up all snazzy like this! I'd rather go naked! Take it off, PLEASE!”

Nana sweatdropped. “Goodness me. Why are you so against wearing nice clothes?”

Idia unloaded all of his thoughts after one quick glance. “You're asking me WHY?! If people see me in a tux like this… They'll have a field day! "A wedding tux? More like a tokusatsu villain, ROFL." "What is this, a cosplay convention?" Only cool guys can pull off flashy vintage getups. Otherwise it's a fashion disaster waiting to happen. You know, like when you see a cool outfit online and buy it, only to realize it was just the model who looked swank. Why'd you pick a patterned suit, anyway? Every guy and his brother think it looks cool, then they put it on and look like clowns. There are only three guys on campus who could pull this off: Vil's a legit pro, and then Leona and Malleus' faces are mega-striking.”

Grampy gave a small smile. “I beg to differ. I admit, I was a bit skeptical when Her Highness first brought you in and claimed you were her perfect partner. But now you're the very picture of perfection! You look marvelous!”

“Yeah, right. You're just saying that to be polite. Let's be real here. You're laughing at me on the inside. You're going, "Who does this slouching, baggy-eyed loser think he is, dressing like royalty?" Idia sneered.

Grampy began to rub small circles on his head tiredly. “How can someone be so negative?”

“Even in the ghost realm, we hardly ever see anyone as morose as you. But no need to worry. I'm sure you'll begin to look on the bright side once you're with our lovely, sweet princess, and your princess.” Nana forced a smile.

“Now that you're suitably dressed and groomed, let's get you to the wedding hall. Idia's bound by our princess's power, so we'll have to wheel him in on a cart. Heave!” Grampy said, expertly manhandling him, Nana joined in with a, “ho!”

Vertically, Idia lamented to no one in particular. “First I'm a groom, now I'm a piece of luggage?! HELP MEEE!”

☆ OUTSIDE OF THE CAFETERIA ☆

“To think that SEVEN suitors would show up at once…” The ghost guard shook his head.

“I know I am the right prince for your princess. Do not accept any paltry substitutes.” Vil said resolutely to the ghost guard.

"Prince"?!” Jack whipped his head in disbelief in Vil’s direction.

“I know she'd end up falling head-over-feels for me. Come on, be a good sport and let me meet her, would you?” Vil took a few steps closer to the ghost guard.

“Who are you and what have you done with Vil?” Leona eyed Vil warily.

“I'm not just a model, remember. I'm also a professional actor. I keep tons of acts in my back pocket for a rainy day. She wants a prince, doesn't she? A professional always delivers.” Vil cooly answered.

“You don't even know if you like her, Vil. Yet you're still gonna lead her on? You should take love more seriously, if ya ask me.” Jack crossed his arms.

“Aww, would you look at that. A talking sea urchin!” Floyd chimed looking at Jack.

“All I'm saying is this is basically a scam, and that ain't cool...y'know?” Jack continued, ignoring Floyd’s odd nickname.

“Jack, buddy. You're looking at this all wrong.” Vil turned, placing his hand on his hip.

Bewildered Jack exclaimed, "buddy"?!”

Vil nonchalantly explained. “This is a competition to see who among us can charm the bride. And I NEVER hold back in a competition. Simple as that.”

“Ugh. You know, I'd take the regular you over this slimeball.” Leona grimaced.

“What's wrong, Leona? Scared you're gonna lose?” Vil taunted, not even bothering to look at Leona.

“You think I'm scared? Hey! Ghostie! I came all this way to see the lady, so get a move on and bring her out here.” Leona shouted to the ghost guard.

“How dare you refer to Her Highness with such flagrant disrespect! You're all random strangers, as far as I'm concerned. We've no reason to trust you. So if you truly want to see Her Highness… You'll have to prove your strength!” The ghost guard called reinforcements and the battle commenced.

Finally NRC had the upperhand in defeating the ghosts by numbers. Oh how the tables have turned. Since the majority of the undead were too caught up preparing for the wedding, the ghosts who fought were given an expertly sound thrashing. Team Tall entered the cafeteria.

Finding her guards catching their breath, Eliza spoke, 'are you the ones who seek my hand?’

Jack lowered his voice and said to no one in particular, “there she is! So that's the Ghost Bride who nabbed Idia and Thorn.”

The ghost bride spoke in an even sweeter tone, “I appreciate you coming all this way, but I'm afraid I have to apologize. You see, there's this lovely man named Idia, and this charming woman named Thorn, and we've already promised ourselves to each other. He's tall, with an air of nonchalance...Her skin is luminous, his lidded eyes dignified. Oh, and she has the most charming smile that she reserves just for me. His hair is so vibrant it burns! And he's got the loveliest lips, which are a color I've never seen before. They’re both positively dashing. Perfect in every way! So you see I couldn’t possibly take another husband or replace mine.”

Trey rubbed the back of his head, “weirdly, I can't say that description DOESN'T match Idia. Or Thorn for that matter.”

“Your attentions flatter me, but compared to my darling Idia, you're—”

“Obviously superior!” Vil and Leona had not stopped squabbling with one another since they had arrived and had both made the same declaration.

“Looks like they've lost sight of our objective.” Jade smirked watching the chaos unfold.

The ghost bride, cheery as ever announced, “oh well, if you INSIST. Fine, I suppose I can see if any of you are fit to be my husband. Let's start with you—the rugged one with the cute ears.”

Leona let go of Vil’s vest and straightened up, “you're talkin' to me, right? Okay, yeah, hey. I'm Leona Kingscholar. Go ahead and test me. I'm your guy, guaranteed.”

“Ahem...~Would you believe how long I've waited?~” The ghost bride sang.

“...Huh?” Leona was completely taken off guard at the ghost bride’s impromptu singing.

“~I've waited for so very long!~”

Leona’s ears flattened as he let out a confused “bwha?”

“~For a glimpse of that tender smile... From youuuuuu!~”

“I am so lost.” Leona said, rubbing his hands tiredly over his face.

The ghost bride tracked Leona’s movement for a few moments, silently awaiting something until finally Leona spoke, “why's she burstin' into song? Is choosing one of us too much for her?”

The ghost bride advanced on Leona quicker than he could react. “YOU'RE OUT!” With her hand raised a hardy *SMACK* rang out. The ghost bride had slapped Leona across the cheek for his failure to woo her.

“OWWW!” Leona roared.

“Why did the ghost suddenly slap him?!” Sebek winced seeing a glowing red handprint blossom on Leona’s face.

“Unbelievable. A princess was singing right in front of you, and you wouldn't even join her for a duet! You're no prince at all!” The ghost bride said, crossing her arms and looking away from Leona.

“Eesh, and Leona's the only actual prince in our group…” Jack mumbled.

“Next! You there, with the pretty blond hair.” The ghost bride pointed.

“Hey there. The name's Vil Schoenheit.”

“All righty... Ahem! ~Would you believe how long I've waited?~”

“~Waiting for me all this time!~”

“~I've waited for so very long!~”

“~My feelings won't steer me wrong!~”

“~For a glimpse of that tender smile...~”

Vil and the ghost bride sang together, “~from youuuuuu!~”

“Is he actually SINGING ALONG with some random ghost tune none of us have heard before?” Sebek’s jaw was on the floor.

Jade with his eyes not leaving the scene commented. “And harmonizing perfectly, I might add.”

With an earnest smile Vil said, “I could serenade you forever. That's the least I could do for someone whose love I seek.”

The ghost bride giggled. “How very charming! Now, what's your dog's name?”

Thrown for a loop Vil broke character. “Why are you asking about dogs? For one thing, I live in a dorm. Of course I don't have a dog—”

“YOU'RE OUT!” *SMACK*

“OWW! I don't believe this! Have you ANY inkling how valuable my face is?” Vil looked enraged at the ghost bride’s audacity.

“Ah, there's the Vil we know.” Jack said.

“Anybody'd break character if they got turbo-slapped like that.” Floyd added.

“You're no prince in MY book if you don't have a big dog who'll come running when you whistle for help.” The ghost bride wagged her finger sternly at Vil.

“She's got a very narrow view of what princes are. Leona? Vil? You two okay?” Trey looked over to the duo, realizing they hadn’t moved after being rejected.

Vil and Leona made similar sounds of struggle and protest.

Baffled by the pair's strange behavior, Trey continued. “What's wrong? You're both freezing up. Did she slap you that hard?”

“I CAN’T MOVE!” The rejects shouted.

“What?!” Trey’s eyes bugged out in surprise.

“It's like I'm bound from head to toe. Can't even flex my fingers.” Leona frowned.

“I can't use magic either. What is happening?!” Vil’s eyes moved rapidly in the onset of panic.

“I've been searching for my perfect prince for 500 years. Yet you dare to march in here and claim to be him when you're so clearly not? You deserve an extensive lesson on the pitfalls of toying with a fair maid's heart. I'd say the same amount of time I've spent waiting should suffice.” The ghost bride stated matter-of-factly.

Sebek balked, “500 YEARS?!”

Jade’s grin temporarily disappeared for a moment. “I've never heard of a ghost who could paralyze humans with a slap. Her power is apparently just as exorbitant as her obsession.”

“You've got a lot of nerve turnin' me down over some nonsense!” Leona yelled out, eyes narrowing in anger at the ghost bride.

Vil followed Leona’s pursuit of verbal vengeance. “How dare you rebuff my advances! You need to get over yourself.”

Jack weighed in on the darkening situation at hand. “I'm not a fan of lying, but… If two of our housewardens couldn't make the cut, we've gotta seriously step up.”

Eliza’s bright smile returned as she pointed to her next potential victe– suitor. “Next—you there. The strapping young man with the big white ears.”

Jack stood his ground, and apprehensively answered the ghost, prepared to evade any nonsense. “...Name's Jack Howl.”

“How's your skill with a sword? What's the biggest monster you've slain? Do you have a legendary sword that's been passed down for generations?”

“A sword? What good's a glorified metal stick when I can just punch—”

“YOU'RE OUT.” *SMACK*

“HEY, THAT HURT!” Jack’s ears bolted even straighter in alarm (if that was even possible) that she was able to land a hit on him.

Eliza wagged her finger once more and tsk’d. “You can't rescue a princess from monsters without a legendary sword. You're no prince! Next! You, the sharp-eyed, handsome one.”

“I AM SEBEK ZIGVOLT!”

“What instruments do you play? The piano? Flute, perhaps?”

“You wish to know about musical talents? I'm so glad you asked, Ghost! Let me tell you about my lord. His proficiency with stringed instruments is RENOWNED. His violin melodies are hauntingly beautiful... I once heard him on the cello, and his playing had such depth it shook me to my core! His music is every bit as mystical as himself—”

Somewhere in the middle of Sebek’s speech, the ghost bride realized Sebek was not going to stop bragging on behalf of someone else and took matters into her own ghostly hands.

“YOU'RE OUT.” *SMACK*

“PARDON?! You're quite ill-mannered. I hadn't even finished speaking!” Sebek was probably more offended at being interrupted in his lord’s praises more than being smacked.

“You know what's ill-mannered? Bringing up a totally unrelated person during a romantic interlude! You're hardly prince material. Next!” Eliza jabbed her finger at the next man to catch her eye. “The one with the fetching spectacles.”

“I'm Trey Clover. It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Your Highness.”

“...I can't do this! I'm sorry, but we shouldn't see each other anymore. Farewell!’ With tears dotting her cerulean eyes, the ghost bride dashed away slowly in typical shoujo-girl fashion.

“She just...took off?” Trey looked to the fallen and still standing members of Team Tall and gestured with a shrug and a headshake.

The ghost bride awaited Trey’s choice silently, she was no less than a few tombstone chairs away.

“Am I supposed to give chase?”

“Prolly.” Floyd said boredly, picking his ear.

“All right, well... No! Please, wait!” Trey gave a light jog in pursuit of the ghost bride.

“Didn't I just say we couldn't see each other? Please, don't spare me a second thought!” The ghost bride dramatically turned away but gave no indication of leaving once more.

Trey looked over his shoulder, “looks like chasing was the right call. What should I do next, though?”

“Trey, you're supposed to sing a song.” Jade cupped one side of his face and semi-whispered.

“A song? Right now?!”

Jade continued, “that's right. You need to establish a romantic mood with a touching melody that tickles her fancy.”

“I'm not exactly the best singer, but... Here goes. Uhhh... Your... ~Your...~”

“Yes? My what?”

“Your...veil is… As bright as a freshly-bleached dish towel... And your eyes, they're, um, like grapes... ~You're...so lively!~”

It was at that moment, Trey, all the members of Team Tall, and the ghost bride knew, he fucked up. The awkward silence and stare down weighing heavily on the atmosphere.

“YOU’RE OUT!” *SMACK*

“Yeah, no surprises there.” Trey glanced to the side, accepting his defeat.

“My veil is like a DISHCLOTH? My eyes are like GRAPES? A prince would never use such utterly unromantic analogies!” The ghost bride was steaming.

Jade turned to look down at Trey. “Your similes were a tad mundane, to be fair. I'm shocked you couldn't even manage, "Your eyes are like jewels."

“Look, I'm just a regular student, and she totally put me on the spot. All I could think of were things I knew!” Trey defended his lack of romanticism.

The ghost bride tuned them out as she set her sights on her new target. “All right, next! You there, with that disinterested look”

Floyd cracked his knuckles. “This lady's been really gettin' on my nerves. Can I squeeze her?”

“YOU’RE OUT!” *SMACK*

“YEOWCH!”

Leona had to ask, “what did you think would happen?”

“And last we have...you. The handsome fellow with a pleasant smile.” The ghost bride motioned towards Jade.

“Jade Leech, at your service. Do be gentle with me.”

From the sidelines Jack called out, “Jade, you're the last one in the game! It's all riding on you!”

Jade reached into his breast coat pocket, “would you accept a gift to commemorate our meeting?”

“My, what a lovely flower. Is it for me?” The ghost bride graciously accepted the petite pink flower and twirled it between her fingers thoughtfully.

“But of course, Your Highness. Handpicked by yours truly. I saw it and thought of you.”

“He brought her a present?!” Sebek was gob smacked at Jade’s preparedness for any situation.

The ghost bride blushed. “Why, how thoughtful! I'm positively thrilled. Goodness, I believe my heart's all aflutter.”

It was Trey’s turn to ask, “is this actually working?”

“Pfft, whatever, Jade. Isn't that the same flower you dug up in the mountains? The uberpoisonous one? You're just dumpin' it on her 'cuz you can't plant it anywhere else.” Floyd grinned sardonically.

Jade’s smile never faltered. “Correct. It's a highly toxic flower that would ruin any other plants it was planted near. Normally a person's hand would break out if they so much as touched it, but it doesn't seem to have an effect on ghosts. I've learned something new today.”

Flabbergasted, the ghost bride roared, “ARE YOU MAD?! *SMACK*’

“That hurt, your highness!” Jade said.

“He might've succeeded but for Floyd's big mouth.” Vil shifted his eyes in Floyd’s general direction.

Grinning wildly, Floyd answered. “Look, I just didn't like the idea of him sittin' pretty while I'm stuck in slapsville.”

“Ugh, then it's a total defeat.” Jack commented.

The ghost bride frowned and crossed her arms sternly. “What rude louts you are. Not a one anywhere near prince material!”

In the moment of silence, Trey spoke up. “Something's just occurred to me. Not to state the obvious or anything… But we're a bunch of students at an all-boys school. Yet we were supposed to propose to royalty? Isn't this whole challenge completely out of our league?”

“......
………
…Yeah, actually.” Was spoken unanimously.

☆ OUTSIDE OF MR.S’S MYSTERY SHOP ☆

Huddled around Ortho’s observation screen, the other’s that stayed behind had seen the crash and burn that had befallen their fellow peers.

“I didn't expect Team Tall to get wiped out so quickly.” Headmaster Crowley said in surprise.

“Did you see how Floyd goaded the ghost into slapping him? Zero hesitation. Let that be a lesson: It is folly to pick bridal candidates solely based on height!” Riddle announced proudly.

Ace was beside himself in laughter, “Bwahahaha! Dude, Trey's singing was hysterical! I know some people got simple tastes, but PHEW, those lyrics. Talk about priceless! Ahaha!”

Fronting his honor student persona, Deuce nudged Ace. “Cut it out, Ace! No need to insult Trey...*snrk* Augh, I just can't! It gets me whenever I think about it! Bwahaha!”

Rook wiped his tears away with a tissue. “Alas, poor Vil! His immaculate cheeks, marred by a maple leaf-shaped slap mark! And the color matches too. It breaks my heart! His fair features being blemished is a tragedy of epic proportions.”

Epel attempted to act like he cared. “Uh, yeah... Totally… (But golly, the look on his face when he got shot down...*snrk*)”

Laughing harder, Ace wheezed out, “the whole thing was a comedy of errors.” That got the trio laughing harder, they failed miserably to suppress their laughs.

The Headmaster was fuming to say the least and scolded the first years. “This is hardly the time to be yukking it up! This isn't a game. Shroud's and Silvanus’ very life hangs in the balance! Dear, oh dear. Where do we go from here?”

“You need not worry on that score!” A newcomer proclaimed. “I would like to make up for the shortcomings of my dormmates, Jade and Floyd. My word, they have no idea how to treat a lady. I, on the other hand, can offer you an Azul Ashengrotto guarantee: I'll get the Circle of Severance on her hand.” He pushed up his glasses resulting in a glare of someone who has truly thought of it all.

“Oh please. I'M your guy if you want advice on how to woo a cutie.” Cater boldly stated, cellphone stuffed into his pocket.

“Wow, Cater. You seem pretty into this.” Deuce’s eyes widened in admiration.

“What can I say? I'm in my element! Ooh, you should come with Deucey. The more wingmen the merrier!”

“Wait, me?! This kind of stuff isn't really my strong suit... I don't know the first thing about girls' feelings! I couldn’t even talk to Thorn! And he’s not even a woman!”

Ace chimed in. “Debatable. So you're just gonna abandon Trey? Thorn? I see how it is.”

Deuce looked scandalized. “What?! No! I would never do that!”

“Then get to scootin'. I'm sure Trey and Thorn are just waiting for you to swoop in and save the day.” Ace said.

“You know what? You're right. Trey deserves to have his revenge, and Thorn their freedom. I'll be the guy to deliver it.” Deuce punched one hand into the flat of his other, a fiery look appearing in his features.

“There you go! Shoot your shot and sweep her off her ghostly feet!” Ace cheered.

“Okay, count me in, Cater! Let's band together and crash that wedding hall!”

“(Oh, Deucey. You can't even see how he's playing you.)” Cater whispered to himself.

“I suppose I might as well throw my hat into the ring as well. I could barely call myself a teacher if I failed to make up for my student's deficiencies.” Lilia casually lore dropped.

“That sounded so cool!” Epel’s eyes sparkled from Lila’s cool speech.

“Heh. The matter is in good hands, rest assured.” Lilia smiled cockily.

“Too bad you won't even get a turn, Lilia. Cay-Cay's gonna slay-slay!”

“Heh, I believe you'll both find me a very hard act to follow.” Azul smirked.

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

Chapter Text

The Phantom Bride

Love At First Fright

Part 3

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

☆ CAFETERIA ☆

My incessant annoying chatter and threats allowed for my freedom, sorta. Escorted by a handful of guards, I was brought to the wedding venue early, once I passed through the doors all eyes locked on me. It appears the second wave of suitors were granted access to attempt to woo the phantom bride. I didn’t have enough time to gauge the boys’ expressions as Eliza squealed in delight upon seeing the lovely works her seamstresses had done and rushed over to embrace me.

Once released from Eliza’s bone crushing hug, she showered me in compliments, “Thorn sweetie! You look absolutely darling and radiant in white! I had no idea you could get any cuter!” Eliza paused for a moment, “You know it’s against the rules for spouses to see one another before their wedding day… But I’ll forgive you since I’ve been informed how you were missing me terribly… And you’re so cute!” Eliza side-hugged me and rubbed her cheek against mine affectionately.

A wolf whistle cut through the air, surprising everyone, causing Eliza to let go of me. We all turned our heads to the source of the noise.

The sound of a camera shutter rings out. “Nice legs Thorny! Who knew a smoke show was buried beneath those baggy patchy hand me downs? The fans you’d draw from NRC alone– *GASPS* The numbers you could do and sponsorships you’d get as a magi-influencer!? Thorny! We totes have to unlock that potential cutie–” The rizzler continued on his ramblings and praises.

“Cater!” I blushed in embarrassment, but despite my protests, the rizz master was too caught up in his own world. “Could someone slap him for me?”

“On it Sweetums!” Eliza cheerfully smiled. *SMACK*

“No way!” Cater cried out in disbelief, paralyzed.

Floyd laughed loudly at Cater’s glowing red flop. “Shrimpy! You look like a beautiful jellyfishy!--”

“And equally as deadly, my how enchanting.” Jade nearly purred out.

Awkwardly, Trey tacked on, “sorry we failed. You look great though, Thorn.”

Vil scoffed, “I could have designed better, these phantoms missed Thorn’s charm entirely– Cat got your tongue Leona?”

“*Tch* do they look comfortable receiving this type of attention?” Leona asked, annoyed at Vil’s goading.

Jack agreed. 'Prefect-Leona is right, we shouldn’t be making these types of comments if it bothers them, that’s not cool.’

“Then again, the prefect does look delectable like this.” Leona added, looking Thorn up and down, minus his signature smirk.

“You’re cute Thorn I must admit. Not as cute as I am, however.” Lilia chuckled.

Deuce and Sebek were silent blushing messes, and at this point, I was too. Unsure of what to say or do as we had already accidentally lost one suitor.

Despite his shyness, Deuce approached the ghost bride next. “Uhh.. Ghost bride?”

“Ah! How would you protect me from the forces of ancient evils while also surprising me on our anniversary?” The phantom bride asked chipperly.

Deuce couldn’t get the words out, turning scarlet, smoke was practically coming out of his ears. *SMACK*

I winced at the sound. Promptly Deuce was rolled next to the other residents of Slapsville.

“Why did you slap Deuce?!” I couldn't help but to ask in alarm.

Eliza tsk’d. “A worthy suitor is brave, and his insistence on not speaking revealed that he was but a meek mousling.”

I argued back. “Give him a moment?! I thought it was sweet, and rather polite he was taking his time to craft the perfect compliment.”

Eliza looked at me, expression unchanging. “Aww, sweetie pie you’re too kind to these ill-bred men, but that’s one of the qualities I like about you. Always seeing the positive in people, but leave the important decisions for me, okay?”

I said nothing, staring back buggy-eyed in shock that Eliza was super casual about looking down on her supposed future partner and her slaps.

Azul said everything the phantom bride wanted to hear, perfectly, sweetly, and gentlemanly, he even gifted her a bouquet of glossy ruby roses, even I received a rose, and he sang a clarion love song.

Forcing a grin, I vouched for Azul. “You must admit, this suitor excels in all areas of importance, nothing but a fairytale romance if chosen.”

Eliza thought for a moment, *SMACK*

Thrown off kilter, Azul lashed out, “WHY WAS I REJECTED?!”

“Gyahaha! She smacked you good, Azul!” Floyd’s fit of laughter almost had him rolling.

“Why?! You rub me the wrong way! For one you lacked any ounce of sincerity, and you hadn’t stopped talking since you opened your mouth!” The phantom bride earnestly said.

“Eliza please! Despite those *minor* flaws that could easily be remedied he’s done all what you seek and more, and as an added bonus he showed interest!” I said growing fed up with this back and forth.

“Idia has an interest in me, he’s just shy, and you have a unique way of showing me, we can be happy together, just you wait and see.” Eliza smiled.

“Eliza even if you marry Idia and I you’ll be just the same, you won’t be happy. In fact, you’ll never get your wish, and you want to know why?” Eliza let out a small gasp, her ghostly legion was growing antsy at my words, but nevertheless I carried on. “You’ve set impossible standards that no person, living or dead, could ever hope to achieve, don’t you want something genuine? I know I’ve explained this before, but I think it bears repeating: the love Idia and I share is intentional. We’ve seen one another at our highest and lowest and still cannot find faults within the other person, there’s laughter and banter, and even when things get tough you cannot find it in yourself to dislike them. When I look at Idia, I see a person, not a concept or project. Honestly look within yourself and ask yourself if those qualities you seek actually mean anything to you.”

The room’s silence was deafening. I paused for a moment to catch my breath and continued. “It’s wrong of you to carry on like this, and deep down you know this. And YOU!” I pointed to all of her servants. “You should all be ashamed of yourselves for not stopping these fantasies sooner, you think her highness is solely to blame? Did you think yourselves accomplishing a noble endeavor by feeding into her delusions? I think it’s cowardice, you’ve done your princess no favors, and it’s gone too far–”

Puffy, having watched the princess’s smile fade, took it upon himself to pull me a few feet away from the princess and covered my mouth.

“I understand where you’re coming from…” Eliza said slowly.

Was this it? Had I gotten through to her?

“You’re worried about me.” And just like that, Eliza was smiling again.

The room was stunned speechless, save for Lilia who took this opportunity to approach the phantom bride gallantly. He kissed the ghost bride’s hand, and began waxing and waning poetically *SMACK*

The room silently erupted into ‘???’

“I’m sorry dear cute suitor, but that’s just the problem you, see? You’re too cute by half!” The phantom bride cried out.

“Oh, the vicissitudes of being as cute as a button…” Lilia sniffled.

Snapped out of his daze, Sebek shouted. “For Lilia of all people to receive the slap of rejection...HOW?! YOU'RE EVEN CUTER THAN THE GHOST HERSELF!”

The phantom bride turned fiercely to Sebek’s direction. “Would you stop shouting?! Why must modern men be such brutish cads? They come courting and don't even have the decency to wear nice suits. Oh, Idia, darling, I knew you were the only man for me. No one else comes close!”

Puffy released his hold on me and stood by princess Eliza’s side as he glared at the failed suitors. “I couldn't agree more, Your Highness. These suitors are all hopeless knaves who wouldn't know gentlemanly conduct if it slapped them in the face.”

Azul got a wonderful idea. “Your highness, a bride shouldn’t compete with another bride.”

The phantom bride, interest piqued, allowed Azul to continue speaking.

“After all, suits really are the most flattering and handsome fashion a man can wear. Could you really share that gentlemanly charm with another woman present? One you yourself have claimed as ‘too cute to resist?’ And that was once previously engaged to said man? I wouldn't be surprised if the two somehow managed to elope before the honeymoon, leaving you alone again.”

The anxious frown that adorned the princess’s face, revealed that she had been swayed by Azul’s persuasion.

“Azul?!” I whisper-shouted at him, the suitor failures side-eyed him.

“He’s right.”

‘!!!’

“Princess Thorn, I know my dear sweet future hubby Idia was your intended first, but you have the rest of your life to find another, better suited soulmate! Please, from one woman to another, I implore you.” The phantom bride hugged me tearfully.

Once the phantom bride released me, my sides were flanked by two soldiers who forcefully picked me up in a bruising grip, I couldn’t struggle free. What is up with the transparency and going solid when it’s convenient?! I was then sat in the gravestone chair and promptly tied to it, seated next to Azul.

“Since you are now technically my ex-fiancée and royalty, it would be too cruel to slap you, I ask that you wear these cute belts instead.” Eliza smiled brightly.

“Boo! Shrimpy didn’t enter Slapsville! Tomato, tomato, tomato” Floyd whined.

I remained silent for a long time, trying to piece together why Azul would do what he did as the phantom bride’s delusions were threatening to unravel.

“I cannot BEAR this. How could I be outshone by someone as antisocial as Idia?!” Vil growled.

“That shut-in probably can't even sing!” Leona groaned.

“Idia's nothing like the rest of you. Like I said, he's a perfect prince. I'm sure he'd love to join me in a song. He's just a tad shy at the moment.” The phantom bride giggled.

“Dear me, those claims are absolutely delusional. It seems to me you're projecting your notions onto Idia and refusing to see who he really is. So long as you gaze into the distance, you'll never find what you seek. It's much more important to see what's right in front of you.” Lilia sagely said.

The phantom bride was starting to get fed up. “Enough with your gibberish. I know what I've found. And that's Idia, my perfect prince!”

“Thanks Azul,” I said quietly. Azul’s breath hitched, but otherwise he remained unresponsive.

Puffy looked crestfallen at his highness’ confession.

The ghost bride puffed out. “This whole endeavor was a waste of time. We need to get the ceremony preparations underway.”

I continued to pester Azul. “Did you say all those things because you felt no one could succeed in securing the phantom bride? But you knew you could persuade her to let go of me?”

“Your Highness, you must be worn out after dealing with these humans. Surely there's no rush.” Puffy tried to placate the princess.

“I can neither confirm nor deny those allegations, but I can say I have no confidence in anyone securing the phantom bride. There’s absolutely no hope to diffuse over 500 years of delusional fantasy, but there was a chance, a calculated risk, that I could save you… Not because I like you or anything, so whatever you’re thinking, stop. But for extortion purposes.” A glint appeared in Azul’s eyes.

“Aww, you're worried about me? Tee hee, that's so sweet of you, Puffy! You've been my dearest friend through thick and thin ever since we were alive.” The ghost bride blushed.

“Yes... Your friend. Of course. That's why I'm here, Your Highness.” Puffy dejectedly answered.

‘That’s rough buddy, friend zoned even in the afterlife.’ I thought, glancing back at Azul, as a joke, I leaned over closer and asked him, “wanna make out or something if we survive?”

Azul was absolutely unprepared for that bombshell, he blue screened on the spot. Sputtering and sweating. I chuckled at my little joke.

“As it would appear my prefect is currently malfunctioning, it would be difficult to assess when he may return to normal, however, as vice housewarden, it would be my honor to receive such a tribute in his steed.” Jade smoothly interjected.

“Now, show Idia in.” The phantom bride called.

“Here he is, Your Highness!” Nana and Grampy said in unison as the pushed opened the grand cafeteria doors.

Now no one had time to dissect what had just transpired between half of Octavinelle and I, as a tied-up Idia was swiftly pushed in, figuratively and literally.

“Augh…” Idia groaned. His flaming locks of blue fire had been tamed into a presentable half slicked side, and sleek ponytail draped over his left shoulder. His tuxedo was a deep shade of midnight accented with a faint fiery skull pattern. A smokey gray cravat was secured with an equally dark jewel, a black vest, his lapel held two bursting white lilies, underneath two decorative knives and a silver ‘x’ hung.

Upon seeing him, the ghost bride cried out in joy. “Oh, IDIA! That long fitted jacket really enhances your air of nonchalance. Its black color and gothic style contrasts delightfully with your bright hair, and those white lilies are as charming as your smile.”

“I took the liberty of pulling his hair back. It's a minor, yet critical detail.” Nana explained proudly.

“Now you can enjoy his lidded eyes and flawless features unobstructed!” Grampy tacked on.

“He's positively dashing! I expected nothing less of the attendants who helped my mother and father prepare for their own nuptials. Idia, darling, you look every bit the perfect groom! I'm absolutely beside myself!” The ghost bride fanned herself, practically vibrating in happiness.

Idia began to mumble loudly. “Ugh, this embarrassment burns. I mean the parts that aren't already on fire, that is. Did I lose a bet or something? Or maybe this is a dream. Can I wake up now? I just wanna go back to my room.”

“Whoa, Idia's dressed to the nines!” Deuce exclaimed.

“He's as frozen as we are. They wheeled him in here on a stand.” Trey balked.

“She slapped Idia too? Bridey's downright ruthless!” Cater said wide eyed.

The ghost bride turned to the peanut gallery. “I resent that. I'll have you know I just gave him a teensy poke because he tried to run.”

“Stunning rescue, guys. You crashed and burned, and now you're nothing but a pile of wreckage.” Idia rolled his eyes at the group, noticing Thorn however, his hair took on a tinge of pink for a quick second. “How did Thorn delete their save file on this marriage?” He muttered.

“Grr…” Everyone verbalized their disdain of Idia.

Idia, unsatisfied with the ghosts digging his metaphorical grave, picked up a metaphorical shovel. “Shouldn't you normies be good at all this vapid socializing stuff? Aren't you embarrassed?!”

“GRRR.” Everyone had reached a unanimous decision on how they would ‘help’ the ingrate next.

“You are SO right, honey dearest. Any other guy is a total wreck compared to you! And the way you tell people hard truths when they don't want to hear them? Well, that takes real kindness and integrity! You're just so perfect, I can't wait a minute longer. WE'LL HOLD THE WEDDING TONIGHT!” Princess Eliza said resolutely.

Idia started to sweat. “Wait, TONIGHT?!”

“Yes, darling! Just imagine: tonight, when the clock chimes midnight, we'll seal our eternal marriage with a kiss! Then you'll shed your mortal form, and together, our souls will depart for our honeymoon!” The princess declared.

“And leave this mortal coil without getting to read my manga?! NOOO! Guys! You gotta get me out of this!” Idia twisted his face in physical pain.

I frowned thinking about the prospect. ‘Not being able to read books you were looking forward to, or discovering your new favs, I feel your pain. But he did insult everyone so he kinda deserved it… I’m joking!.. Maybe.’

Vil smirked. “Well, well, well. It sounds like you've found someone who loves you in spite of your bad attitude.”

Rubbing salt in the wound, Leona piped up. “Yeah, y'know what? Good on you for finding your soulmate.”

“What?!”

“Why are you so shocked after hurling all those insults at us?” Jack’s eyebrow went up (metaphorically).

I muttered to myself. “Honestly Idia… Haven’t you ever heard the saying ‘be nice to the people who handle your food, or they’ll spit in it?’”

Grampy cheered at the news. “It's finally happening! Our princess's wedding, 500 years in the making! Back in the old days, this event would've merited a nationwide celebration.” Grampy’s face then turned glum. “But our neighbors were ungrateful scoundrels! They betrayed us without a second thought!”

“Just remembering it makes me want to die all over again!” Nana wailed.

“Now, now. No use crying over fallen kingdoms. Getting upset won't make it any better.” Princess Eliza smiled softly.

Nana and Grampy couldn’t help but say “princess…”

The ghost bride spun around suddenly. “Ooh, I have an idea. I'll make all these suitors groomsmen. And my ex-finace can be my bridesmaid! They can be part of the ceremony! That way we can have the kind of merry wedding you two want. Okay, everyone. You're going to help celebrate the start of me and my darling's life as newlyweds!”

“Can we NOT?! Please, somebody, anybody... Ah! AZUL! Aren't we Board Game Club buddies?! You're a fast talker; talk some sense into this ghost!” Idia begged with his eyes.

Azul faked sniffled. “To think that Idia, king of all introverts, would get married... I can't see through all my tears of joy. My heartfelt congratulations. I'm sure it's going to be a wonderful wedding!” Azul couldn’t help himself as he devilishly smiled at the end of his performance.

Hesitantly Idia called out, “Thorn?”

“My dearest ex-fiancé in Christ, I have made my attempt, I can only do so much. I need a moment!” I said, volume raising at the end.

“NOOOOOO!” Idia wailed, panic setting in all over again.

Puffy looked around sadly, accepting to keep silent on the matter.

☆ OUTSIDE OF MR.S’s MYSTERY SHOP ☆

“So much for our B Team… (I will be having a serious talk with my naive dove, Ashengrotto, and Leech later, to say the least. *sighs* at least one student has been spared from this ill fate, but at what cost?”) Headmaster Crowley lamented.

“BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Did you see how awkward Deuce was?! Who goes dead silent as soon as they say their name?! That was pure gold!” Ace wiped the tears from his eyes. “And Thorn saying those embarrassing cheesy lines in that getup? Pffft!”

“Myahahaha! They all paraded in there like they owned the joint, then immediately got the royal smackdown!” Grim cackled.

“This isn't funny, you guys! The wedding's happening tonight! My brother's about to be unwillingly dragged to the land of the dead.” Ortho said sternly.

“There's not much time until midnight. We need a successful proposal, and fast.” Riddle proclaimed.

“But even Azul and Thorn failed. The only housewardens left are the two of us, plus Malleus.” Kalim said sadly.

“I suppose we have little choice. We'll have to round up every remaining potential suitor!” Headmaster Crowley said.

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The quest to find potential candidates, were all shut down quicker than the Headmaster could blink. “So we have gathered a grand total of...NOBODY.” Headmaster Crowely slumped.

Ortho shook his head. “Absolutely heartless.”

“Worry not. You have two qualified suitors right here!” Rook said, grabbing onto Epel’s shoulders and volunteering him.

“Rook Hunt! Epel Felmier! You’ll help my brother?” Ortho asked hopefully.

“But of course. Helping our fellow man is one of the most beauteous acts. That, and I refuse to let any more mockery of Vil's fair features continue! And you'll find Epel every bit as motived as myself.” Rook gallantly claimed.

“That's right. I'll save our housewarden and make him recognize my strength! (If I do that, then maybe…)” Epel not-so-nobly said.

Ace was indifferent. “So our C Team consists of two people. Well, I suppose I can't blame the others for not wanting to get involved—”

“I’ll join you.” Riddle said plainly.

“Wait, why?! You're not seriously going to rescue Trey and Cater?” Ace questioned.

Riddle nodded. “That's part of it. A housewarden's job is to make up for the shortcomings of his dorm's students, after all. However, I have an even more critical reason. Aren't you forgetting something important, Ace?”

“Am I?” Ace asked indignantly.

“Rule 703: "Anyone who comes in second in a croquet tournament must serve the queen tea the next day."

“What's that got to do with... OH! Oh yeah!” Ace’s eyes widened in recognition.

“Connected the dots, I see. Cater placed second in yesterday's croquet tournament! He must return to the dorm before tomorrow. He has to serve tea to the queen—that is, to me—sometime today!”

“Dude, this is kinda an emergency, if you haven't noticed. I'll just make you some tea if Cater can't—”

Riddle shook his head. “Out of the question. You didn't even rank in the top ten yesterday, Ace. In compliance with the rules, I will make certain Cater returns in time.”

“Sheesh. Always the stickler… Well, it still beats the way you were before. And it's not like any of this is my problem!” Ace turned to walk away from Riddle.

Riddle carried on. “So the next team of suitors will consist of myself, Rook, Epel...And Ace, making four of us in total.”

Ace whipped around, making his way back to the group. “ME?! How am I a part of this?!

Riddle crossed his arms indifferently. “Were you planning on sitting out?”

“Yeah, obviously! No reason to leap onto a trainwreck in progress. I want no part of it.”

Riddle dismissed him with one hand. “Fine. Go back to the dorm and tend to the hedgehogs or something. I'll be just fine with Epel here.”

“Huh? Why me?” Epel blinked in surprise.

“Because unlike Ace, you possess actual bravery.”

“Excuse me?” Ace scrutinized his gaze on the duo.

Riddle sighed. “Pity my dorm's freshmen are such cowards. You have more courage in the tip of your pinky than they have in their entire bodies.”

“Ex-CUSE me?” Ace balked.

“I suppose it's for the best we don't have any of those spineless worms tagging along. They'd just slow the rest of our team down.”

“EXCUSE ME?!” Ace marched up to the guys. “You and Epel wouldn't even get a turn if I was there!”

“Oh, is that so?” Riddle asked, looking Ace up and down.

“You bet your boots. I'll have that bride eating out of my hand with my slick moves. So you just sit back and watch as I dazzle her silly!”

Rook stood beside Riddle and masked a laugh behind his fist. “(Heh heh heh. Monsieur Heart is endearingly devious.)”

“(Heh. Heartslabyul students must always be prepared to band together like the card soldiers of yore.)” Riddle whispered back.

Ace quickly recovered and was back to his usual self. “For that matter, I'm not convinced the rest of you guys would make the cut anyway. I could possibly see Rook, but you and Epel are shorter than the bride—”

“Do you want to lose your head, Ace?” Riddle started turning red.

“I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING.” Ace shouted, backing away slowly.

Grim sighed. “(Hmmp! Dummy hench-human, leaving me.) Why’d my tuna supplier have to go be a dumb hero?” Grim crossed his arms with a frown.

Rook interjected. “Now, now Monsieur Fuzzball, I’m sure the Trickster was thinking of you when they volunteered to rescue Roi de sa Chambre.”

“Huh? Why would they do a thing like that?” Grim cocked his head to the side. Still frowning.

Rook passionately spoke, “the Trickster cares for you a lot, Monsieur Fuzzball. I’ve observed how they consider you in their decisions, and many would not willingly step into the unknown just so that their companion could be safe.”

Grim’s irritability faded away as he thought about Rook’s words, soon he began to smile, and his tail started to move. “I’ll join too!”

“Nobody was askin' you, Grim. We don't need you on the team, you’d be a hindrance more than anything.” Ace looked down at Grim with a scoff.

“And just what do you mean by that?” Grim frowned.

“I concur with his assessment. The odds of the bride choosing you as her groom are... infinitely approaching zero.” Ortho supplied, he even included project graphics of the data as proof.

“Grrr... Okay, I didn't wanna go at first, but now you've got me fumin'. I'm the charming-iest guy around, and I'll prove it! I'm goin' with you! And I’ll rescue my hench-human to boot!” Grim said, making a fist with his paw.

“Ah, how beautiful to see you all so impassioned to win the bride's heart!” Rook cheered.

‘Considering how much time's left until the wedding, this will be our last chance. If Operation Proposal fails for a third time… Idia's life will be forfeit.’ Headmaster Crowley informed solemnly.

Everyone gulped, reminded of the consequences if they failed to get the ring of severance on the phantom bride.

“The Ghost Bride censured the A and B Teams for not dressing appropriately. And she was rather taken with Idia's tux. We cannot ignore this vital piece of information. I say we create the Perfect Prince Package!” Headmaster Crowley said, passionately, leading the final group back to Mr. S’s Mystery Shop.

Mr. S wasted no time in and spared no fanfare in spinning another sale’s pitch as soon as the team walked in. “Want the apple of your eye to favor you? To ensure that when you pop the question, she says, "I do"? Then you're in luck! I have a plethora of goods made to win over your one and only. IN STOCK NOW! ...Or at least I did, until you bought my entire supply. Thanks for your patronage, Headmage!”

Headmaster Crowely dabbed the imaginary sweat off his face with a handkerchief, “dear me... The expenses keep mounting higher.”

Mr. S smiled widely as he took the stack of madols. “But you get what you pay for. My stock is guaranteed to win your bride's heart. Take the tuxes our would-be grooms are wearing, for example.” Mr. S gestured to the backend of the shop, awaiting to see the would-be grooms.

“Where do I pin this boutonnière?” Epel asked out loud.

“It goes on your lapel. Here, allow me” Rook took said boutonnière and expertly placed it.  “...There you go.”

“I'm not sure I got all this stuff on right. There's a whole lotta parts here.” Ace semi-complained, shifting around, causing the curtain to sway.

“Your Albert chain and rosette are perfect.” Rook assured Ace.

Ortho called out, “come on out if you're ready.”

“All right.” Riddle pushed open the curtain and stepped out. “Well... Here I am.” Riddle’s hair was semi-slicked back, he wore a stark red tux with black accents, black slacks, his black waistcoat was covered in fine gold detailings, in his lapel a singular ruby rose sat, pairing nicely with his gold cravat and white gloves.

Rook stuck only his head out from behind the curtain, still helping the freshmen. “Roi des Roses, you look positively gallant! Beauté, magnifique!”

“Your words are appreciated. I must hand it to you as well, Rook. You've certainly mastered the mature look; you're a credit to your year.” Riddle smiled from the praise, looking in Rook’s direction.

“Merci.” Rook exited out of the change room with a theatrical ‘swish’ of the curtain. Rook's signature hat was left behind, opting for nothing but his neat blond bob. His violet tux stopped at his waist in the front but ran longer in the back, he wore a vertical white and purple striped vest that accentuated his red bowtie and white gloves. A sterling arrow connected with a chain to a poison apple had been pinned to his breast pocket, along with a red handkerchief inside said pocket.

Ace was next. “Sure, Housewarden Riddle and Rook look fine and all… But I'm definitely not used to these fancy duds. I can't decide if it's cool and new, or just stuffy and uncomfortable.” Ace wore a striking red plaid suit with matching bottoms. His bangs were pinned back, a black bow tie and black waistcoat tied the look together with a timeless yet modern feel. Pinned to his coat was a blue ribbon with yellow and black outlining.

Finally Epel arrived. “I know what you mean. Do I look weird in this getup?” Epel wore a white tux with semi black outlining, and black pants to match. His bow tie was more akin to a bow than a tie, and was golden with two small silver chains running underneath. In his lapel was a white rose surrounded by a few white buds, and his waistcoat was a lavender with plaid markings.

Rook was quick on the draw to give out his sincere compliments. “Far from it. It highlights your charming looks and adds a debonair twist. That goes for both of you, of course.”

Ace scratched the back of his head. “I have a hard time taking Rook's compliments at face value. (Too bad Thorn isn’t here, they’d give it to me straight.)”

“These Suitor Suits you're all wearing are imbued with ancient magic! My understanding is that they make people who wear them extra-attractive to ghosts or something along those lines. You also get some bonus swag for purchasing the Suitor Suits… Consolation Bouquets!” Mr. S revealed four magic embedded bushels of bouquets.

“Oh là là! They're as colorful as they are lovely.” Rook reached for one of the bouquets, everyone else followed suit.

“Needless to say, these are no ordinary bouquets. Their blooms draw sustenance from negative emotions. They absorb sorrows, grudges—essentially, those feelings that fuel a ghost's power. You can gift it OR toss it. Should cover all bases for you little imps!” Mr. S winked.

“With this arsenal, that bride's heart is as good as mine!” Ace boasted.

“I'm starting to think I could actually pull this proposal off!” Epel stood straighter, confident.

Mr. S’s demeanor went from carefree to serious. “Never underestimate the power of drip! Just remember one thing, little imps. Only the Circle of Severance can actually send the Ghost Bride on to the afterlife. Your success depends entirely on getting that ring on her finger.”

Headmaster Crowley added, “her ghost retainers will also be most vigilant this close to the ceremony. If you fail to demonstrate your perfect prince potential, they won't even let you through the door.”

“That won't be an issue. I'll use what time we have wisely. I'll prove I'm the picture of a perfect prince!” Riddle said over-confidently.

“I, too, shall expend every effort to spin words of love and affection. I'm sure with sufficient sincerity, she'll see how much I care.” Rook made a show of bowing with one hand flat against his lapel.

“I'll capture her heart, I just know it!” Epel announced.

“Yeah, I'll bang out a proposal and have this wrapped up in no time!” Ace grinned.

“We're gonna rock Operation Proposal and bring home the tuna!” Grim sang, rushing for the door.

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Exiting the mystery shop, some of the group members’ fire had been smothered. Epel broke the awkward silence, “so I guess it's just the four of us storming the cafeteria to rescue Idia, huh.”

“All the other teams failed spectacularly. Disappointments, every single one.” Riddle closed his eyes in disappointment.

Ace had to ask, “*sigh* How did I get dragged into this again? Does Idia seriously not have any friends who can step up? Like, at all? I know Thorn tried to bang it out, but they were in waaaaay over their head.”

Rook took this opportunity to flex his way with words. “We all sparkle in different ways. The Roi de sa Chambre shines when conversing with his own heart. He is not one for forming friendships with scads of people.”

“In other words, he's a shut-in.” Riddle deadpanned.

“Oui, just so!” Rook mock smiled.

Ortho came over in a rush. “Can we PLEASE focus on the mission and stop dissecting my brother's lifestyle? You all have to figure out how you're going to present yourselves as worthy suitors.”

“The bride's looking for the perfect prince, isn't she?” Epel questioned.

Ace looked Epel up and down. “I'd say you're already on the right track, Epel.”

A tad embarrassed Epel asked, “really?”

“Height aside, you tick all the classic prince boxes. Even the way your suit flutters is princely! Just pull on some platform shoes to make yourself look taller, and you'll be good to go” Ace nudged Epel.

Epel halfheartedly crossed his arms. “That's not true... At least, I don't think it is.”

Riddle added his two cents. “Conversely, you have a hard road ahead, Ace. Your uncouth language does little to recommend you.”

“Hey, then couldn't you say the same for Leona?” Ace defended himself.

“Yes, and he was spurned, in case you missed it. You could at least TRY to behave like a prince. Even a slapdash effort would be something.” It took everything in Riddle to not roll his eyes at Ace’s antics.

“Yes, Housewarden.” Ace responded.

Ortho, seeming somewhat satisfied that the group was taking serious consideration into their roles, went off somewhere else.

Riddle sighed and put a gloved hand to his forehead. “We're supposed to become perfect princes in order to propose to the Ghost Bride. This is our last chance to rescue Idia. It falls to us to present ourselves as ideal husbands.”

Ace shrugged. “I dunno, man. The whole "prince" and "husband" thing don't exactly click with me.’

“Me either…” Epel quietly said.

“Heh heh heh. You bourgeons are adorable.” Rook sweetly said.

Ace’s eyebrow went up. “What's a bourgeon?”

“It means flower bud. And how delightfully innocent it is to see you buds perplexed by the mysteries of the feminine heart!”

“...Is he mocking us?” Ace semi-whispered to Epel.

Epel’s eyebrows furrowed slightly in thought. “No...I don't think so. Rook's always showering people with compliments. It's his thing.”

“Hmm. In that case, Rook'll probably win over the bride, no sweat. Say, Rook. How are you planning to impress the bride?” Ace asked, facing Rook.

“Ace, we all know you're just trying to steal his idea for yourself.” Riddle crossed his arms, not particularly upset by his tactics.

Ace gasped the fakest gasp he could muster. “Why, I would never! I'm simply asking. Y'know, for educational purposes.”

“I plan to compose a poem and recite it for her.” Rook stated.

“Poetry, eh? I guess a princess lost in her own fantasies might go for that. I don't read poetry outside of class, so I couldn't crib his idea even if I wanted to.” Ace gave another small shrug, already disinterested.

“Likewise. I can memorize other people's poems, but I've never written one myself. I'm curious as to what we can expect from you, Rook. What manner of poem will you offer the bride?” Riddle asked, arms unfolded.

Rook lit up. “That is the question isn’t it… Aha! I think I have it. How about this:

Teaching you love—June flowers. Hiding your tears—June showers.

In July, you fade away. And in July, I stand dismayed.

You are a bird, soaring free. Soft wings beat without mercy.

I am but a foolish tree, branches quiv'ring without thee.

Keep the sun hidden, I plead! So this bird may rest with me!

Fin.”

“…”

“Nope, totally useless.” Ace huffed.

“Oh, is it? I clearly have a long way to go as a poet, then. Very well. I shall compose an even finer poem by the hour of our visit!” Rook’s eyes were sparkling, determined to hone his craft.

“That's not what I meant! It's just that writing snooty poems full of avian metaphors or whatever is way beyond me.” Ace clarified.

Epel agreed. “Seriously. I get embarrassed just thinking about saying stuff like that.”

“Right? Sorry, Rook. You delivered what I asked for, but I don't think I'm ready for poetry.” Ace said.

Rook dramatically waved his arms about. “Non, non. There's no such thing as being ready when it comes to verse! Poems are an expression of feeling; they are a gift that all possess in their hearts. I believe it most important to give voice to the passions inside me. Were I to remain silent, sentiments like "Très bien" and "Je t'aime" would forever go unheard.”

“I agree a person should express themselves, but I'm just too easily embarrassed. I couldn't do it.” Epel said.

Ever determined, Rook continued. “I see. In that case, allow me to try a more beginner-friendly poem! Ahem…If it weren't for your presence, I wouldn't be here. If it weren't for your presence, my dreams would be unclear. If it weren't for your presence, who would be my sage?”

“Y'know, this one's a lot more accessible since it doesn't have the flowery words!” Ace lit up, happy at being able to actually understand Rook for once, sorta.

However, Rook was not finished. “I'm so happy you are here, my esteemed headmage! Fin.”

“That was for the HEADMAGE?!” Ace yelled, slack jawed and buggy eyed.

“Wasn't it supposed to be for the Ghost Bride?!” Epel was thrown for a loop too.

Rook simply smiled. “I thought you'd find it more approachable if I related it to a familiar face.”

“I'm not sure I follow that logic. Of course it's important to show respect to the headmage, but still…” Riddle trailed off, unsure of whether Rook’s methods were appropriate or not.

“Epel wasn't kidding. You'll compliment anyone. But then, isn't it all a bit hollow? Compliments aren't that flattering when the person's tossing 'em out left and right. They have to mean something, y'know?” Ace casually crossed his arms.

Rook gasped in betrayal. “Your misgivings wound me. I mean every word I say! The world is filled with beautiful things… And I simply love each and every one of them.”

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Chapter Text

The Phantom Bride

Love At First Fright

Part 4

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The group had split up in order to perfect their husband and prince act in their own privacy. Team Tux had agreed to meet up in front of the iron gates, however Epel was the first to arrive. He verbalized his thoughts as he paced back and forth. “The perfect prince, huh… I bet the perfect prince would deliver a cool, smooth proposal. He'd get down on one knee like they do in books and movies, and then hold out a rose and say… "Might I have the honor of your hand in marriage?" Or...something like that. Nope, nope, triple nope! Can't do it! Just the thought of saying some highfalutin line makes me cringe! *sigh* Sure ain't easy being a perfect prince.”

“Might I have a word?”

Epel turned to the direction of the stranger. “Huh? You're...Silver, right? Vil put you in his movie that one time.”

“That's right. You're from his dorm, uh…” Silver blanked awkwardly.

“Epel.”

“Ah, yes. Epel. Sorry to bother you, but I'm looking for Malleus. Have you seen him?”

Epel turned his head to the left and to the right. “I haven't, sorry. Is something the matter?”

Silver suppressed a sigh. “I took my eyes off him for a second, and he left the dorm. I can't find him anywhere. Knowing him, I'm sure he's not in any danger, but I can't be too careful. I did notice you were frowning quite a bit just now. Everything all right?”

Epel nodded. “Oh, I'm fine. It's just, well... I have to pretend to be this perfect prince.”

“Ah, for the rescue operation. You're going to propose to the Ghost Bride to save Idia and the others, correct?”

“Yep.” Epel said with a tight-lipped smile.

Silver looked thoughtful. “A prince, though... Well, I suppose I do know Malleus.”

“From what I understand, it's less about actual lineage and more about the image the bride has in her head.” Epel clarified.

“Hmm... I did hear a bit about that. It's a tricky challenge. You know, when I was a child, my father told me there were several requisites to being a perfect prince.”

Epel became enthusiastic upon hearing that. “Really?! Then please, share them!”

“I believe one of them was... "Whenever a princess sings, a prince runs to join her in perfect harmony." Silver said, doing a bad impression of his father’s voice.

“Say what? I have to sing a DUET?! Just gettin' roped into karaoke burns mah biscui—ah, I mean, it spoils my mood.” Epel quickly recovered before he could go full country.

“Another was... "His teeth must be so pearly white they sparkle in the sunlight."

Epel balked. “Does anyone have teeth that white?!”

Silver chuckled. “I don't know. It struck me as odd too. I'm sure things differ by time period and culture as well.”

“That's one way to write that one off… (I feel a little better after talking to Silver. At least it made it clear that being a prince isn't my thing.)” Epel muttered to himself, having given up on acting as a prince.

“Oh right, there's one more thing I remember about being a perfect prince. A crucial one.”

“What is it...?” Epel might as well ask, he hasn’t anything else to lose

“A prince always shows up riding a white horse.” Silver quoted.

Epel crossed his arms in thought, hand to his chin. “A horse, huh. There was a ranch near my home growing up, so I've done a bit of horseback riding here and there. Does it have to be a white horse?”

“Yes. It's non-negotiable. I have no idea why though.”

“I see… Wait, you're in the Equestrian Club, right? Are there any white horses in the stables?”

“There's...one.” Silver apprehensively revealed.

“Really? Could you show me? A white horse might help me be a more convincing prince!”

Silver was reluctant, given the horse’s nature, but it would be wrong to lie or one-sidedly decide what a person could or could not do. “Well... All right. Come with me.”

Silver and Epel walked swiftly through the sportsfield to the stables, a twilight sky illuminating their way. Once the stables were in view, Epel leaned against the fence and said, “wow, look at all these amazing horses!”

Silver walked inside the stable doors waiting for Epel to follow. “The white one should be in the back corner. It tends to keep to itself.”

Epel was starstruck from such a magnificent stallion. “Golly, what a beaut! Its coat's all nice and shiny. I reckon it can gallop mighty fast! May I ride it?”

“I wouldn't if I were you.” Silver cautioned.

“But why? Am I too short for it?” Epel had long since understood that his height may cause problems in doing certain things, so he wasn’t put off by Silver’s remark.

“No, actually. This horse is relatively new to the school, and it has a bad temper. I'm the only one who's had any luck riding it. Its hind kick is particularly nasty. Even our advisor has trouble getting close to it.” Silver said.

“I see… Wait a minute. It's folding its ears down and baring its teeth. I don't think it's bad tempered at all. Let's see…” Epel climbed over the stable door with ease and slowly approached the horse.

“Hey, don’t go so close! You'll get hurt!” Silver called out, not daring to enter in case that spooked the horse further.

Epel kept his voice even as he spoke, “I'll be fine... Probably.”

“Stop! If you approach it from the front—” Silver went closer to the stable door, prepared to pull Epel out if the situation called for it.

“Neeeigh!” The white steed let out, going back and forth between standing on his hindlegs and all fours.

“Easy there. It's okay!” Epel calmly said, showing he was empty handed, walking closer still.

The horse let out a “*snort*” and remained on all fours.

“Whoa, whoa... Steady. I'm your friend.” Epel placed his hand on the horse’s snout.

“…” The shimmering white stallion did nothing.

Silver’s eyes widened in disbelief. “Why, the horse has calmed down. That was too close. If it had really kicked you, you could have been seriously hurt. Epel, why would you pull such a dangerous stunt?”

Petting the horse’s head, Epel answered. “Well, you see… I figured the horse was just scared. The way I saw it, it was probably having trouble adjusting to a new environment, so it was getting defensive. I've learned that with horses like that, you can't force them to obey. You have to calm them by showing you're not the enemy. Our neighbors had a stubborn horse once. Everyone was stumped on what to do, until Peepaw showed us that trick.”

“Ah, now I understand.” Silver smiled.

Turning to face Silver Epel asked, “Silver, may I borrow this horse for a bit? Showing up on a white horse might just get the bride's attention!”

“Sure. Just be careful.” Silver said, still eyeing Epel and the horse warily.

“Of course! Okay, horsy. Would you give me a ride?” Epel asked, gazing into the horse’s soft brown eyes.

“*snorts*” The horse agreed easily.

“Thank you. What a nice horse you are. Hup… I'll be going now! Giddyap!” Epel mounted his horse with ease. They flew out of the stables leaving Silver behind.

Silver watched as Epel dashed off into the night. “I'm honestly amazed. He didn't try to force the horse to do what he wanted. He calmed it by facing it head-on. Astride that white horse, Epel truly does look like a perfect prince.”

☆ IRON GATE DOORS ☆

The sun had long since set, the darkening sky set a somber tone for the trio waiting for their fourth member. A crisp breeze whistled through the abandoned streets, sending a shiver down Grim’s spine.

Riddle tapped his foot impatiently. “What's taking Epel so long? It's nearly time to go.”

Ace shrugged nonchalantly. “You think he got cold feet?”

“Non, non. Monsieur Pommette would never behave in a cowardly manner. I'm certain he'll turn up any moment—” Rook was interrupted, speak of the Epel and he shall appear.

“GUYS!”

“Sheesh, way to come in at the buzzer...Uh, Epel?” Ace turned to where he thought Epel was, but no one was there.

“What's chargin' at us through that dust cloud?” Grim squinted, paw over his forehead in an attempt to get a better look.

The dust cloud was soon upon them, with a sharp pull of the reins a fierce whiny rang out, Epel answered. “Sorry for the wait! It took a bit to get everything ready.”

“Why are you riding a horse?!” Ace loudly asked.

Epel calmed the snowy stallion and had him trot next to the group. “What do you mean? Aren’t princes supposed to arrive on horseback?”

“Does any prince from this century do that? Housewarden? Rook? Back me up here!” Ace looked between his seniors, hoping they’d agree that arriving on horseback was weird.

Rook was quiet for a moment. “Epel… I have but one thing to say about your hard work, ingenuity, dynamism, and determination: très bien!” He enthusiastically called.

“You also chose the most uncooperative horse in the entire Equestrian Club's stables. And yet it's on its best behavior! You must have a way with horses, Epel.” Riddle praised.

Softly patting the horse, Epel took in the praises. “Heh heh. You flatter me.”

“Dude, talk about dressing for the job you want.” Ace said under his breath.

“Are you finished gripping, Ace? We don’t have all night you know.” Riddle said, walking towards their destination.

“We have three hours until the wedding. I'm afraid we must save the friendly banter for later.” Rook casually said, easily keeping up with Epel and Riddle.

“Oh, I'M the distraction?!” Ace yelled, doing a light jog to catch up with the rest of his group, Grim following close behind.

Trotting around the corner, Epel called out to the ghost guarding the cafeteria gates. “Okay, here goes nothing! HELLO!”

The ghost guard lazily looked up, “hmmm?”

“Bon soir. We are here to seek the lovely bride's hand in marriage.” Rook politely informed.

“More suitors? Our princess is fed up with the stream of insolent louts knocking on our door. I have standing orders to let no one pass! Remove yourselves at once!” The ghost guard frowned.

“Are you sure you want me to leave? You'll sorely regret it if you do.” Epel said.

“Is that right? Well, don't you sound sure of yourself. If you're so confident, then I shall assess you. Pretend I'm the princess and propose to me! Convince me you're serious, and I might consider letting you pass.” The ghost guard straightened up, ready to be properly woo’d.

“(Let's bang this out and get through then.)” Ace whispered.

“(Agreed. If we were to try brute force and get beaten back, the mission would be a failure.)” Riddle whispered back.

“(Um... All right, I'll start.) Ahem! Allow me to be the first!” Epel brought the ghost guard’s attention on himself once again.

The ghost guard accepted. “Very well. Show me your most heartfelt proposal!”

Epel spoke of the words he had heard from classic fairy tales of yore. “I swear that I will always make you happy. I shall be the horse-mounted prince who gallops to the rescue when my lady love is in distress! No matter what troubles arise, I'll never give up or walk away. I'll protect you from all that could harm you. I know I'm a prince worthy of you, my princess! Please, will you marry me?!” Epel stared back, intently yet sweetly at the ghost.

The ghost guard was pleasantly taken aback from Epel’s proposal. “Goodness, what an earnest gaze. Not to mention… You're actually riding a white horse! How utterly princely!”

“They're real into the horse... Does that mean I was wrong and he was right?” Ace thought aloud in disbelief.

“And who is this orange-haired fellow? Are you the prince's retainer?” The ghost asked, looking down from Epel to Ace.

“ME? A retainer to EPEL? Now that's funny. As if I'm anything like these other plebes.” Ace scoffed.

“Oh, you're another suitor? Very well. Let's see your proposal, then.” The ghost guard straightened up once more.

Ace nodded, as he spoke, two people came to mind. “Every day'll be a blast if you marry me. And yeah, when two people are together long enough, they're gonna have a couple spats. But I promise I'll always apologize when we do. When the goin' gets tough, you can snuggle up with me, and I'll always put a smile on your face. I'm the right prince for you, Princess. So please… Don't bother lookin' at any other guys. Marry me!”

The ghost guard sniffed, touched by Ace’s words. “I could sense how much you want to make your partner happy. What a genuine display. And to think I suggested you were a mere retainer! I do beg your pardon.”

“(You know, that WAS a rather sweet proposal. You and Thorn must be cut from the same cloth.)” Riddle smirked, teasing Ace.

Flustered, Ace semi-whispered back, “(can it on the peanut gallery. I was fakin' it and makin' it.)”

Riddle continued teasing Ace. “(Uh-huh, sure. That was absolutely from the heart.)”

“Myahaha! Ace is gettin' in his feelings!” Grim laughed.

“Aw, shut up!” Ace directed at Grim.

“I thought it was very YOU, in a good way. Too bad when all is said and done, the princess will be picking me.” Riddle confidently declared.

Hearing this, the ghost guard called out, “all right, you're next. Let's hear it!”

Riddle stood proud and spoke resolutely. “I swear my loyalty to you! Come what may, I promise I will never doubt you, nor will I hurt you. For you, I would do anything in my power. Would you give me your hand in marriage?”

“Oh... My goodness… How convincing. I do believe my heart STIRRED for a moment.” The ghost guard was clutching his non-existent pearls.

“No kidding. That was so cool!” Epel said.

Ace smirked. “Pretty earnest yourself there, Housewarden.”

“...... C-cut it out, guys.” Riddle’s cheeks flushed, right to the tips of his ears.

Rook clapped his hands, “all three of you were merveilleux! And now it is my turn.”

“Those are quite tough acts to follow. It'll take more than some halfhearted words to set my heart aflutter!” The ghost guard informed.

Rook began his love induced monologue. “Mon trésor, I implore you to allow me to be your eternally devoted love. I know of the centuries you've spent in solitude, so I have composed a poem in your honor:

Ill-fated princess of yore...

Lo, how you make my heart soar.

Oh, your cold face streaked with tears.

Vibrant warmth, I'd share for years.

Eyes of azure, misty, yet strong.

You'll find I'll dry them ere long.

Once I've caught your clear-eyed gaze...

Undying love, yours always.”

Epel was taken aback. “Whoa…”

Ace fidgeted. “Dude, just hearing that made me feel like I was gonna blush.”

Riddle remained silent and took Rook’s words into consideration seriously. “...Ah! Guys, try putting the first letter of each line together!”

“The first letters?” Epel questioned.

Grim groaned, “you think I memorized that whole spiel?”

Riddle continued, “I should've written it down. What an oversight! Well, I can still do it for you. When you put the first letters together… They spell "I love you"!”

“WHAT?!” Everyone, sans Riddle, Rook, and the stallion balked.

Rook gave a closed eye smile. “Exactly. I'm pleased you noticed, Riddle.”

“I'm a crossword expert, as it happens.” Riddle supplied.

Ace shouted. “How is that relevant?!”

Grim let out a small puff. “These Pomefiore guys are all weirdos, if ya ask me.”

Epel shot Grim a look. "All"? Let's take it easy now.”

“Oh, was that not enough for you? Then allow me to proffer my next composition!

Alas, in my chest's a hole.

Left from when my heart you stole.

Would that I could turn back time,

And escape this love sublime.

Yet there is no other way, Save going further astray…” Rook was cut off by a frantically blushing ghost.

“Okay, enough already! You're wild about her! I read you loud and clear! I grant the four of you are nothing like the feckless oafs who came before.”

“We've passed your test then? Great. You'll let us through now, right?” Riddle inquired.

“However… There is one small matter.” The ghost said.

“What's that?” Riddle pressed.

The ghost locked his eyes with Riddle, “you. You're too short.”

“......

......” Riddle looked down to his shoes.

“Housewarden, stay cool!” Ace tried to taper the flames of Riddle’s oncoming rage.

“...How…” Riddle balled up his fists, turning white.

“He doesn't appreciate what a swell guy you are! Talk about a rube, am I right? Ha ha ha…” Ace started sweating, his housewarden wasn’t getting any cooler.

“How dare you… HOW DARE YOU SPEAK TO ME THAT WAY! OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!!!” It was all for naught as Riddle erupted in scarlet, staring down the ghost,

“Pardon?!” The ghost guard sounded a bit fearful.

“You shall burn, you insolent fool!” Riddel unleashed his pen and the ghost turned as red as his hair.

“OUCH, THAT'S HOT!” The ghost failed around, a burning, scorching mess.

Rook spoke. “Magnificent flames, Riddle. They engulfed the ghost straightaway.”

“How long must I endure these jabs?! Men grow well into their 20s! I've got time left!” Riddle yelled, less scarlet than before but still burning for a fight.

Ace masked his snicker. “Sounds like you looked up that factoid yourself. Has this been bothering you?”

Riddle was quick to answer. “Not at all! What bothers me is people who judge others by their appearance!”

“Sure, I get that. But if you use loud, flashy magic…” Epel trailed off, watching as more apparitions were seen flying down the pathways.

“What's all this commotion?!” Ghost B shouted.

“That's what I was afraid of. The ghost retainers are coming!” Epel said, coaxing his horse away from the burning ghosts.

“Did you all do this? We must capture the interlopers forthwith!” Ghost C yelled, calling forth more ghosts.

“Criminy! These ghosts are bustin' out magic now!” Grim bobbed and weaved through the onsetting chaos.

“So much for proposing on horseback. You should get back to your stable before things get worse.” Epel said, handling the horse so that he may turn around.

“Neigh!” The horse cried and bucked.

Ace shouted over the flames and ghosts. “That horse is the least of our problems. Your magic just sent Operation Proposal up in flames!”

“Sorry... I already felt pressured by the time limit, so when I got angry, I just…” Riddle was interrupted.

“You're the lousiest suitor out of anyone who's come so far!” Ace yelled at him.

“Urgh... What have I done?” Riddle hung his head in shame.

Rook placed a hand on Riddle’s shoulder. “It's fine, Roi de Roses. You bristle like a hedgehog when angered. It's quite beautiful in its own right. I'm sure even the ghost you burned away is giving you a standing ovation.” As they looked up, the first burned ghost fluttered away into ashes in the night sky.

“Most definitely not.” Ace said.

“Her Highness's wedding is upon us. We won't let anyone ruin it!” Ghost B yelled, approaching the group with a small army.

“Fine, if that's how it's gonna be… We'll just do this the hard way!” Ace whipped out his magical pen, ready to fight his way through the hoard.

Everyone knew that a fight was out of the question: they had long since learned that these ghosts were evasive and properly eliminating them took too much time and energy that they didn’t have. When the ghosts made their infamous ghost wall, everyone shot their magic and charged through, entering the school.

“We got through the gate, but those ghosts just keep reviving!” Epel shouted, slowing down to look over his shoulder.

Ace grabbed Epel. “Don't stop now! We gotta get to the cafeteria. That's where the wedding's—”

“Watch out!” Riddle ran up behind his team and swiftly smacked a green orb like projectile out of the way.

“Prefect!” Ace shouted, eyes wide in shock of what could have been game over.

“That was close! That attack would've hit us if Riddle hadn't deflected it.” Epel too was surprised.

“What a petty trick!” Ghost A gripped.

“We won't let you scoundrels ruin the princess's wedding! We'll capture you soon enough!” Ghost B yelled with a scowl.

“You have some nerve, talking about ruining things when you're the ones who seized our school.” Riddle glared.

“My word. He has such a tremendous presence despite his small stature!” Ghost B said, stopping at the intense stare down Riddle was giving them.

“Don't back down! We'll show him how terrifying ghosts can be!” Ghost A gestured for the other ghosts to follow his lead.

“Ack! The ghosts are circling Riddle!” Epel said in alarm, stopping once again.

Riddel shooed his teammates away with the wave of his hand. “Leave me! I'll hold them off. The rest of you go and make sure the operation succeeds.”

Epel wouldn’t relent, feeling like they were having Riddle sign his death sentence if they left him like this. “But there are so many ghosts, and only one of you!”

“We're in this mess because of me. I'm taking responsibility for it. You don't have to worry about me. Just who do you think I am?” Riddle smirked cooly.

“He's right. Our housewarden's got it in the bag.” Ace smiled confidently at Riddle.

“But..”

Ace took hold of Epel and started running again. “Look Epel, we’ll just have to trust that the prefect has it covered, there’s no time!”

“That's the spirit. Until we meet again, then.” Riddle called out, encircled by a brigade of ghosts.

Riddle’s cat-and-mouse game with the ghosts carried on for what felt like ages, yet Riddle refused to lower his guard. He would never permit these ghosts to go past him and ruin what small chance they had.

“Seize him!” Ghost A commanded, a gaggle of ghosts charged for Riddle.

“I don’t think so!” Riddle jumped with ease over the advancing line and set fire to the lot of them.

“GWAAAH!” Ghost A cried out in frustration, none of their ghostly tactics could best the scarlet warrior.

“That's my 362nd victory. Surely you've gotten the message by now. As long as I'm here, none shall pass. It doesn't matter how many of you there are.” Riddle huffed, yet still stood tall.

“What's with this guy?! He's so tiny, but he's as strong as a monster!” Ghost B gestures wildly to Riddle’s stature.

Riddle glowered. “I don't appreciate a ghost calling me a monster. And what was that about me being tiny?”

“Eep! He's glaring daggers at me!” Ghost B was properly frightened at the red menace before him and cowered.

“Hey! We're here to help!” Ghost C shouted, many ghosts following in pursuit.

“Oh, thank goodness.” Ghost A said with a sigh of relief.

Riddle surveyed the area. “Reinforcements. I'd say about 50 of them.”

“All of us have to rush him at once! There's no getting past him otherwise.” Ghost B sternly called.

“Right!” Ghost C concurred.

“Urk... They're going to attack simultaneously?! If I don't stop them, they'll pose a threat to Ace and the others. But even I have my limits… Hm? Something fell off my jacket. A rose petal? Ah, of course. I remember…”

Riddle made a mad dash for the exit, determined to return to Heartslabyul’s rose maze. The ghosts took the bait easily and had completely forgotten about the other three miscreants that had snuck past them long ago.

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

Once inside the rose maze, Riddle took in the state of the place. “In accordance with the Queen of Hearts' rules, I'm supposed to finish pruning these roses before tomorrow. But because of all this Ghost Bride nonsense, I'm nowhere near done! I'm busy enough as it is. Why must I prune roses on top of everything else?! Trey and Cater shouldn't have gotten captured so easily. When they get back, it's off with their heads!”

“That's quite the impassioned soliloquy.”

“...! Well, well. Hello, Malleus. To what do I owe the pleasure? I hope you're not here to send a frost upon our flowers. The poor roses are cowering in fear.” After the initial shock, Riddle had cradled a rose in Malleus’ direction.

“A frost? Ah, yes. That's a classic Thorn Fairy anecdote, isn't it? You can relax. That's not why I'm here. I actually wished to thank you, Rosehearts.”

“For what, exactly?” Riddle looked at Malleus perplexed.

“You're going to rescue Shroud and the other captives, yes? My retainers Lilia and Sebek are part of that group.” Malleus elaborated.

“Ah, I see. There's no need to thank me, though. I'm not rescuing Lilia and Sebek for your benefit. The Heartslabyul housewarden is expected to show initiative during campus emergencies. I will expend all my efforts to find a solution. Why would I flout tradition?” Riddle turned back to pruning the few odd roses in front of him.

Malleus was impressed with Riddle’s perseverance. “You're rather mature for someone hardly older than a newborn babe.”

“Are you familiar with the concept of noblesse oblige?” Riddle inquired.

“Certainly.”

“It's a prominent school of thought that has a long history in the Realm of the Roses. "Those with power and status have a duty to aid the weak, proportional to their station." I simply honor that precept”

Malleus nodded. “I see. I do wonder if you judge me, though. I suppose from your perspective; my conduct is unbefitting a leader.”

Riddle corrected him. “I don't think that at all. Your position as prince of your land must come before your position as housewarden. Though you may wish to fly to your retainers' rescue, you are constrained by circumstance.”

“......”

Riddle continued. “Leader or no, I come from common stock. That, plus my small stature might make me less eligible for this princess, but still!”

“Heh… Clearly, I was worried over nothing.” Malleus chuckled to himself.

“What do you mean?” Riddle asked.

“I am Briar Valley's heir apparent. As you presumed, I cannot enter into an engagement lightly, even on false pretense. That's why Lilia and Sebek went on my behalf. But we're both aware how that turned out. My retainers were imprisoned because of me, and it troubles me that there is nothing I can do to free them.” Malleus lamented.

“Now I see. So you've come to offer guidance, since I'm taking part in the rescue operation. You must think me rather incompetent.” Despite Riddle saying this, he did not take offense.

It was Malleus’ turn to correct Riddle. “Come, do not bristle so. Did I not just say I was worried over nothing? I've witnessed firsthand how you care for your vassals and your determination as a leader. I assume you've received no royal tutelage, yet you have the bearing of a king all the same.”

“Malleus…” Riddle was unprepared for such a complement.

Malleus carried on. “Nonetheless, there is room for improvement regarding your appearance. You carry yourself with dignity and grace, but you lack a certain...majesty. If you are to impress the princess upon first glance, you should wear something indicative of your stature.”

“As I've said, I'm not an aristocrat. I don't have anything to denote merit or station.” Riddle repeated.

“Rosehearts, would you share one of those pruned roses with me?” Malleus pointed with his eyes.

“If you like. What are you going to do with it?” Riddle passed the rose to Malleus.

“This.” Malleus placed the offered rose in Riddle’s lapel. ‘When adorned upon you, this simple rose carries more weight than any medal.”

“Malleus…”

“If you are king of this rose garden, you must carry yourself with a rose's strength and nobility.” Malleus finished resolutely, walking away continuing his late-night stroll.

“...Well. With a genuine prince telling me this, now I really can't make a fool of myself. I swear upon this rose, I shall fulfill my duty and rescue all the captured students. You can sit back with some tea and enjoy the show. That's right. I made a promise. Malleus wanted to be here but couldn't. So he entrusted me with his retainers' safety. Who am I to just give up? That would be entirely unacceptable. You know this, Riddle Rosehearts It's my duty to hold the line, and so I shall. Not a single one of you will pass!”

When Riddle was done his speech, the horde of ghosts faced him head on. Their determination dwindled as Riddle encircled everyone in a magical fiery blaze. The entirety of the rose maze burned, scorching all those that dared to get too close. With harsh intensity, Riddle was resilient and refused to be defeated.

“We've got a huge group and you're not even flinching?!” Ghost B gaped.

“Of course not! After all, I am…”

☆ DIASOMINIA LOUNGE ☆

“Are you sure we shouldn't try to rescue Father and Sebek?” Silver asked, rising from his chair.

“It'll be fine. Rosehearts has set out for the main building. We have but to relax and drink our tea, and Lilia and Sebek will return in short order.” Malleus reassured his retainer.

Silver sat back down with his tea. “Riddle's certainly capable, but I admit I'm surprised at how much faith you have in him.”

Malleus explained. “Faith? I am merely acknowledging the truth. After all, he is…”

☆ HEARTSLABYUL ROSE MAZE ☆

“THE KING OF HEARTSLABYUL!” Riddle completed, walking through the scorched earth as the flames continued to rise higher behind him.

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

The phantom bride floated merrily around the aisle. “Ahh, I get to walk down the aisle like I've always dreamed of… And with my perfect prince. I'm finally getting married!”

“Idia attempts to flee... But his body is numb all over and he can't move! Looking for healer! I don't have any skills that remove debuffs!” Idia cried.

“Argh, if only I could unbind myself!” Deuce twisted his facial muscles in futility.

Puffy berated his actions. “Would you stop squirming? This is a sacred ceremony. Our princess's wish is finally coming true! She's a pure and noble soul who's harbored this dream since she was young. And tonight, at long last, her loving heart will join with her perfect prince. Nothing could be better... Such a joyous occasion…”

“We've got a problem!” Ghost C announced, floating through the wall.

“Hm? What's going on?” Puffy turned.

“Some rascals got through the gate! They're barreling toward the wedding hall and tearing through our troops!” Ghost C wailed, barely keeping it together.

The ghost bride bristled. “What did you say?! Just who are these rude wedding crashers?!”

Ghost C gave the princess a quick rundown. “A short boy with red hair, one with a heart mark on his face, another with delicate features, and a blond boy with a bob cut!”

“That would be Riddle, Ace…” Trey started.

“...Epel, and Rook.” Vil completed.

Jack growled in frustration. “You see?! We could've muscled our way in from the start!”

“What happened to stealing the bride's heart, I wonder?” Azul mused.

“If I'd known how this was going to go, I'd have gone for the strong-arm approach too.” Leona eye rolled.

Cater snickered. “I'll bet you all a bread roll Riddle snapped first.”

“Aha ha, I could totally see that! Count me in. I'll throw in two bread rolls, Seabream.” Floyd cheerfully added.

Jade eyed his brother. “It's not a bet when you're on the same side, you know.”

“Can't argue with that!” Cater chimed.

“Hahahahaha!” Everyone’s (the slap citizens) laughter filled the room.

“My life hangs by a thread and you're all joking around?!” Idia blanched.

“We can't allow anyone to spoil the princess's big day!” Nana decreed.

“The intruders must be apprehended!” Grampy seconded.

☆ STAIRWAY ☆

“Hold it right there!” The ghost demanded of the misfit wedding crashers.

“The retainers just keep multiplying!” Epel called out running up the long staircase.

“They're most serious about this. They've awaited this wedding for 500 years, after all.” Rook said over his shoulder.

“Hragh!” Ace pulled left just in time to avoid another projectile. “They're a nuisance, that's what they are!”

Rook gave it some thought. “A nuisance, you say? I suppose. But don't you find their fervor admirable?”

“I'm too busy running from them to admire them!” Ace yelled out.

“We all have things we won't yield. I know quite well what it means to fight for such a cause. In fact… My desire to protect you all is just as fervent.” Rook casted a magical blast over his shoulder.

“Agh! Our archer is down!” Ghost A bellowed.

Ghost B shook. “He was lying low, waiting to get the perfect shot. But they saw him anyway!”

Rook grinned. “But of course, monsieur. Nothing in the world can hide from me. May I bid the rest of you go on without me?” Rook moved out of his team’s way and faced the ghosts.

Ace blinked. “What?! If you were as good as our housewarden, maybe, but there's no way—”

“Ace, let's go.” Epel said, pushing Ace’s back.

“You jumped on that real quick!” Ace shifted a bit, looking over Epel.

Epel pointed. “See the look on his face?”

Aforementioned Rook was beaming ear-to-ear, like a kid who had been locked inside a candy store; he was not trapped, the candy was trapped with him.

“What about it?” Ace questioned.

“Heh heh heh… I've long wondered how one would hunt a ghost! You have no bodies, but would you solidify if I used magic on you? Or would you disperse like a mist? Could I trap you in a bottle?” Rook gleefully smiled as he chased the ghosts around.

“You want to BOTTLE us?! This guy's creeping me out!” Ghost A scurried about.

“Oh, how my hunter's blood sings when I'm faced with an unknown quarry!” Rook appeared suddenly behind an unsuspecting ghost and dove straight for him.

“Eek! Stay away!” Ghost B trembled in fear.

“......Protect us? Pfft, yeah, right. He's like a kid in a candy store!” Ace pointed to Rook as more ghosts screamed in fear.

Epel nodded. “Exactly. Rook'll be just fine. I hate to say it, but he's way stronger than either of us.”

“I'll admit he's strong, but I don't wanna go anywhere near him.” Grim suppressed a shiver at Rook’s aura.

“Rook's kind of an odd duck, huh…” Ace commented.

Rook watched as the rest of his teammates fled. "For my part, I think I'm going to have a most pleasant waltz with these ghosts.”

☆ CAFETERIA ☆

Grampy floated at the tip of the altar, officiating his granddaughter's wedding, rather emotionally. “Idia Shroud, do you take this woman, in sickness and in health… *sniffle* *sniff* *sob* Oh, I just can't stop from tearing up! It's all so moving!”

“Silly Grampy, how can you cry on such a happy day? If you start, then I might… I might... *sniff* *sniffle* Oh Grampy, this will make me so happy!” The phantom bride couldn't help herself as she floated over to Grampy to console him.

“They're really working themselves up.” Jack idly commented.

Deuce’s eyes searched the room for anything of benefit. “We have to stop this wedding somehow!”

“But we can't move a muscle! Wait but that human can!” Sebek realized and began yelling. “HUMAN! Quit being a useless sack of potatoes on that chair and put a stop to this wedding!”

I argued back. “SEBEK! If I could get out of this chair, why would I still be here collecting dust like the rest of you?! Just for that, my first act of freedom will be kicking you, so for your sake you better pray these ropes hold up!”

Floyd let out an exaggerated groan. “I'm kinda checked out, to be honest. We can go once Firefly Squid smooches the bride, right? Ugh, get on with it already!”

“Agreed. My lower back is sore from being stuck in this position. Just give her the ol' smoocharoo, would you?” Lilia complained.

Sebek shouted out, “you heard Lilia! Make haste and "smoocharoo" the bride!”

Idia quickly uttered, “dude, I will literally DIE if we smoocharoo. What's wrong with you people? Have you no compassion? Do you post joke comments on tragic videos online too?!”

The phantom bride giggled. “Oh my! We're not even done with the vows and you're already clamoring for the kiss? No need to rush. This kiss is coming soon enough, tee hee!”

“......” Puffy gazed at his princess, longingly, heart filled with sadness.

☆ EXTERIOR HALLWAY 2F ☆

“Riddle and Rook are outta the picture, so that just leaves Epel and Ace. Guess that goes to show there ain't no one more dependable than me.” Grim boasted, shooting flames as he ran.

“By golly, I'll show ya dependable—ah, I mean, I can do this too! Come on, Ace. Let's show 'em freshmen can pull their own weight!” Epel said, knuckles cracking.

“All right. We should be getting close to the cafeteria... Whoa!” Ace has once again proven he has great reflexes.

Ghost A growled. “Tch. Dodged it, did you? You're a quick one.”

“Are you okay, Ace?!” Epel called out.

“Please. That lame-o spell was never gonna hit me.” Ace mocked.

“The ghosts have already caught up!” Grim yelled.

Epel pivoted and ran straight at them. “Get back! I'll hold them off and...Wait, what?”

All the ghosts completely ignored Epel. In fact, they even made sure to bypass him all together. “They're not attacking... Why are they turning away from me?’

“Princess, you must flee!” Ghost A beckoned, staring straight at Epel.

Epel spun around, searching for who the ghost was addressing. “Princess? Where?”

Ghost A approached. “You have such beautiful features. You must be here to attend the ceremony, yes?”

“Epel? Beautiful?! *SNRK*” Ace slapped a hand over his mouth to keep from laughing outright.

Ghost B continued, gently speaking as he did. “It's dangerous for someone as weak and frail as yourself to be near such violent creatures! Please, stay behind us while—”

“Who…”

“Hm?” Ghost B waited for Epel to continue speaking.

“WHO ARE YA CALLIN' WEAK?!” Epel unleashed.

“WHOA!” The ghosts backed up a bit, shocked a princess could be so bold.

Grim’s ears flickered. “Yikes, he's like a whole 'nother person!”

Ghost B smiled at first. “Quite assertive, aren't you... Wait a minute! That's definitely a boy's voice!”

“Seize him! Stop him at once!” Ghost A ordered.

“Keep going, guys!” Epel confidently called out.

“Come again?! There's no way you can deal with that many ghosts!” Ace started making his way over to Epel.

“They called me weak and frail. Well, I'm not gonna take that lying down! I'll make 'em regret it!” Epel’s eyes burned with the passion of the beatdown he was going to deliver on these ghosts.

Ace stopped in his tracks, “Epel…”

“Listen Ace, if he says he got it, then he’s got it! We need to go!” Grim urged.

“Hah. You got a real competitive streak, don'tcha?’ With that, Ace ran ahead with Grim.

“Heh heh heh. Go on, Ace! Get to the wedding! As for YOU—I'll show you who's weak!” Epel got into an attack stance, ready to prove those profiling ghosties  wrong.

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Chapter Text

The Phantom Bride

Love At First Fright

Part 5

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"Smooch that ghost! SMOOCH THAT GHOST!" All the paralyzed logs chanted. What hours of helping someone you didn't want to and them in turn selling you out and insulting you will do to a NRC student.

"WOULD YOU CUT IT OUT?!" Idia shouted over the harmonizing of the hoping for his death to come sooner.

"All we can move is our mouths; we've got nothing better to do." Lilia answered with a bored smile.

The phantom bride grabbed Idia's hands and excitedly spoke. "Ahh, soon it will be midnight. Then it'll be time for our kiss! Once we seal our marriage with a kiss, my darling and I will live together forever in the land of the dead. And I'll finally be happy!"

"All right, perhaps we should take this seriously." Vil said, having lost interest in the chanting.

Lilia voiced his concerns too. "Hmm... This is quite serious. Who'll be the next Ignihyde housewarden once Idia turns into a ghost?"

"It's a conundrum. Their dorm has no vice housewarden as things stand. We wouldn't want chaos breaking loose... Ah, might I venture a suggestion? There's magic on campus that allows us to perceive ghosts, yes? What if Idia continued on as housewarden after becoming a ghost? I don't see how it would impede his duties." Jade too took this matter seriously.

Lilia agreed. "I don't believe there's any precedent for a ghost housewarden, not to mention a married one."

"Oh, man. A housewarden who's a ghost AND married? That's too funny." Floyd laughed loudly.

I had to say something. "You guys are awful, you shouldn't talk like that. If the Headmaster had heard, he'd probably find a way to implement that as a way to save on taxes."

The laughter that followed irked Idia. "How is any part of that funny?! I'm getting literally ghosted in less than half an hour, and you guys are turning it into a stand-up routine! I can't believe you. It's like your hearts are made of stone."

"A ghost mentioned something interesting about when we came to save you. Apparently you tried to send the princess after us to save your own hide? What was the exact line again... "You name it, they've got it"?" Vil glared at the twitchy man.

"You were gonna sell out the very friends who were trying to rescue you. That's beyond sad." Leona said plainly.

"Aieee!" Idia's eyes frantically went this way and that as a means of escapism.

"It would appear he has so little to say in his defense, he's resorted to high-pitched squealing." Azul remarked.

"Just wait until the honeymoon, dearest! The destination is a secret, and the trip will be chock full of surprises!" The phantom bride winked as she booped Idia's nose.

"Ughhh... Is this how it ends for me? I'm gonna miss the big patch next month for my online game. I'll never finish those WIP apps. I won't complete my prize toy collection... I'll never get to the latest volume of my manga, much less the final chapter! There's so much left undone! Someone, save me... ANYONE!" Idia wailed.

"STOP THE WEDDING!" The cafeteria doors flew open with a loud *BANG*

Deuce's eyes widened. "I know that voice!"

"*Huff* *Huff* Made it under the wire." Ace wiped the sweat off his forehead, quickly assessing the situation.

Idia squealed from happiness. "AAAACE! That was the clutchest timing imaginable. You're like an action hero! And unlike the rest of these randos, (minus Thorn), you're actually dressed for a wedding! What a cool twist!"

The ghost bride stepped in front of Idia and frowned. "What do you want? Wait, you have a heart mark on your face. Are you one of the wedding crashers?! Don't you dare try to ruin my extra-special day!"

Ace angrily pointed at the phantom bride. "Special, schmechial. You're just shovin' what YOU want down everyone's throat! I'm gonna get this ring on you and send you off, once and for all!" As Ace held the ring in his hand he vented his pent up frustrations. "As for the perfect PARTNER... How about someone you can laugh and cry with? Someone who'll stick with you through all the hard times? That's the kind of person you should be looking for. Geez, you know how embarrassing it is to have to spell it out for you? How is it that none of you ever taught your princess something so basic? You've spent 500 YEARS with her, and in all that time, you haven't done anything that actually benefits her!"

Azul semi whispered to me, "my, my, Ace has quite the influence over you, doesn't he?"

I attempted to kick Azul, but the best I could do was nudge his leg a little.

"Whoa... He managed to say all that with a straight face? His Adonis stat must be maxed. Meanwhile, I've just been worried about the latest volume of my manga this whole time. It's like he's a 5-star...and I'm reroll bait." Idia shivered.

"Ace is right." Riddle had suddenly appeared, and so had the rest of Team Tux!

Idia was buzzing. "Okay, hold up! Now the hero's buddies are busting in fashionably late? CLASSIC! Not to mention... We've got Riddle, the traditional prince who's straightlaced due to his royal upbringing, but who occasionally shows some awkward tenderness! Epel, the dainty second prince players just want to protect. His rare, intense expressions are dark yet compelling! And Rook, the prince from a neighboring kingdom who's revealed to have been secretly protecting the MC, immediately granting him best boy status! These guys are so princely, you'd think they were the cast of an otome game! There's a whole CHASM between them and me. I don't even wanna be seen next to them!"

Cater squinted. "Idia's shaking his head and squirming a lot. Is it just me, or is he trying to scoot away from Team Acey?"

"Why would he try to flee the people who are rescuing him?" Trey asked, confused.

"Nooo! I don't wanna be compared to this crew of cool, sleek, sparkly... Wait. Hang on. Looking at Riddle again... Is his suit mondo-scorched?! His shirt's dotted with soot, and his jacket cuffs are all burnt and tattered. And is that a tie around his neck? I thought it was a towel that'd been washed to bits. Rook's slacks have torn into capri pants, and Epel's jacket sleeves are ripped. Ace's hair's all matted and sweaty... You guys look awful. What happened?" Idia gawked, his rose colored glasses shattering.

"Greetings, Roi de sa Chambre. We ran into quite the show of resistance on our way here." Rook clarified, stepping closer to Idia, not the least bit offended at his observations.

Idia stared. "Ah...hah... Uh, Rook? Got a little hole on your gloves there. Your finger's sticking out. Hee... Hee hee! Hee hee hee! This is surreal. A total sartorial dumpster fire!"

"What... Idia's doubled over laughing now?!" Jack was bewildered by the sight.

"Our housewarden has come to rescue us! ...And probably Ace as well. This is no time for laughing!" Deuce shouted to Idia.

"Pfft, yeah... You're right, but... Hee hee... Nope! I tried. Can't stop LOLing IRL! LOLOL, oh, I can't breathe!" Idia had truly lost the plot, but at least he was happy.

"You ghosts might as well pack it in now. It's way past time you released Idia." Ace said with a stern gaze on the ghosts.

"But..." Nana and Grampy said unanimously.

Rook sympathetically explained. "You can still start over. After all, you wouldn't want your dear mademoiselle to become an evil ghost who kills people, would you?"

"......"

The phantom bride was taken aback. "Excuse me? Are you calling me an evil ghost? I...I'm not trying to be evil! I just—"

"Don't listen to anything they say, Your Highness. You've done nothing wrong." Puffy defended.

"Puffy..." The princess looked to her number one confidant in awe.

"Dude, did you hear that I said about enabling?" Ace asked, annoyed.

'Can't you see you're doing something wrong?" Epel added.

"(Yeah! What they said!)" Iida whispered.

Puffy grew furious. "I don't care if it's wrong. I want Her Highness to be happy. I'd take on the whole world to make that happen. That's MY lingering attachment! MY wish!"

"I sense a power within him that dwarfs all other ghosts! We can't stay here. Everyone, get behind us!" Rook ordered with his arm outstretched.

Epel suppressed an eyeroll. "They're immobilized, though. We have to get them somewhere safe!"

"Epel, Grim! Move these glorified logs to a corner of the cafeteria!'

"Understood!" Epel said as he and Grim ran over to us, untying me.

"Fwnyaa! Thorn! Is it true you care for me?" Grim demanded as he bit and clawed the ropes around me.

I give Grim a bewildered look. "Where is this coming from?"

"Just answer Thorn!" Grim crossed his arms, ropes falling to my sides.

I smile at Grim, and pick him up to give him a hug. 'Maybe the little brat missed me? We'ver never been apart for so long since we've met, or he missed his treats and lounging.'

I rub Grim's back and answer. "Does this answer your question, Grim? Of course I care for my silly kitty."

"I'll keep the ghosts busy. Evacuate the rest. We can't let anyone get hurt!" Riddle ran into the fray.

"You're really set on causin' trouble, huh? Let's get this fight banged out—and by that, I mean clobber this guy!" Ace wickedly grinned, joining Riddle.

Once untied, I helped Grim and Epel push the logs out of the cafeteria. Sebek frowned when he saw me approach him. "Insolent human! I am a retainer to the great and powerful Malleus! Nobody rolls me around!"

"Oh alright fine." I say to Sebek, and made good on my threat of earlier and lightly kicked Sebek out the door. If he bumped into a few more talking logs that was his business.

Idia mumbled to himself at the sight. "(Ace and the others are doing all they can.) (Meanwhile, I'm over here obsessing about everyone's appearance.) (I'm no better than the stupid ghosts who kidnapped me.)" Idia sighed and spoke up, "I'm kinda ashamed of myself. I gotta hand it to these normies. They're main protagonist material. They're cut from a whole different cloth..."

Once Epel, Grim and I had returned. Puffy became a terror to behold. He accumulated 500 years worth of pent up feelings and unchecked power and it was ripping at the seams. He was like the stay-puft-marshmallow man from the ghostbusters, only rowdier! "I will protect the princess...to the very last!" Puffy decreed.

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The battle of the ghost army was not as intense as previous battles, perhaps Puffy had been borrowing the other soldier's spiritual power, making Puffy the toughest adversary to date. Everyone banned together and boosted their attack power by timing the hits to hit from all directions at once. "Whew, finally got 'em! Take THAT!" Ace launched a fiery sphere, a direct hit on Puffy, the finishing hit. (+5 for final attack.)

When the final ghost retainer evaporated, Grim celebrated with a mischievous grin, "woohoo! That's how it's done!"

"Oh no! Noooo!" Princess Eliza put her hands to her face and rushed to the former battle ground.

"There are no more guards. We should be able to get the Circle of Severance on her now.' Riddle called to Ace.

"Let's finish this before she blows a gasket!" Epel shouted where he stood beside me.

"No, no, no..." Princess Eliza mournfully said.

Ace twirled the Circle of Severance between his fingers. "Any last words? You can say goodbye to your precious Idia if you—'

"PUFFY!" Princess Eliza rushed past Ace and Idia straight to Puffy's side.

Everyone let out a "huh?" at the sight of the love-stricken maiden kneeling by some 'rando'.

"Oh, Puffy... How could this happen?! You took a beating defending me from those villains!" Princess Eliza tearfully said.

"Wait, you're calling US villains?" Ace gawked.

With Puffy's head supported by his princess, he smiled. "Don't be sad, Princess. I always feel happy when you smile."

The princess's eyes widened through her grief stricken tears. "Puffy? Why are you fading away?"

"I fear I exhausted all my energy in that fight. Your Highness... I hope you'll always have reason to smile. I wish good fortune upon you. May you live happily ever after with your prince..." Puffy closed his eyes.

"No... No, don't leave me! Your support is what's carried me through all the hard times and helped me follow my dream! I need you!' She pitifully cried.

"Princess..." Puffy opened his eyes tiredly once more, and held Princess Eliza's hand in his.

"Oh my... Of course! I've finally figured it out. My real prince... It's you, Puffy!" Princess Eliza announced, smiling.

"WHATTT?!" Everyone had varying levels of anger or shock at that 'revelation.'

"Princess... No, Eliza. You've always been the only one in my heart, ever since we were alive." Puffy confessed, ghostly glow dimming.

"Oh, Puffy. I love you..." Princess Eliza leaned down and tenderly kissed her loyal attendant's cheek.

"Hm? My injuries are healing!" Puffy called out in amazement. He rapidly became 'solid' once again, ghostly glow returning.

Princess Eliza's smile brightened. "It must be the power of love. You've been saved by true love's kiss!"

"Huzzah! What wonderful tidings!" Nana and Grampy joyfully teared up.

Ace was still slack jawed. "Huh? What just happened? Am I the only one having trouble keeping up?"

"They're clearly painting us as the bad guys..." Riddle pointed out.

Once Puffy had risen, the ghost princess slowly made her way to her ex-fiance. "Idia, darling?"

Idia stared at the former ghost bride warily, still paralyzed. "Uh, yeah?"

"I'm so sorry!"

"Huh?" Iida dumbly stared.

"I'm afraid I cannot return your affection for me. I feel terrible, truly... It's not you, it's me. You're a dreamboat, you really are! I'm sure that one of these days, you'll find someone even better than me. But then, you already have, your true love is with Thorn." The princess slowly made her way over to me. Tuning out the protests and 'whats?!' extending her hand. Epel looked apprehensive, I reassured him and took her hand, she brought me to stand next to Idia.

Standing next to Idia at the altar, the princess carried on. "Thorn was right, you two are a matching set of turtle doves, we're going to take our honeymoon now, completely regret-free. I'll be sure to pop by for a visit next year with a healthy baby!" Princess Eliza winked, "perhaps when we reunite you two may have a little one of our own by then and we could have a playdate?"

Idia and I were turning scarlet at the insinuation. As the few remaining ghosts transcended, anyone who was once cursed by the bride's slap was now freed and many grievances followed. Mainly people shouting "JUST STAY GONE!" and the opposition of Idia getting into a relationship before them and in general.

The Headmaster smiled at the happy ending. "Ahh, a true love found, ending 500 years of despair! What a touching scene. At the end of the day, you can't expect someone to accept a proposal if they don't love you! Love will always be the key ingredient. However, THORN!" Headmaster Crowley yelled, pulling me away from Idia's side and ushered me under his feathered cape.

Ortho flung himself at his older brother. "IDIAAA! I'm so glad you're okay!"

Idia floundered. "Uh... Yeah, I'm safe... Sure... I mean, it's cool, but she didn't really expect me to marry her, right? That's a huge imposition. It's all good, just...y'know. Right? Why do I feel like the one who got dumped?!"

Rook mysteriously appeared next to Idia's side. "Worry not, Idia. Surely someone wonderful awaits you in the future. Certainly not your two ex-fiancees, but someone. Have a good cry tonight, and you'll start afresh tomorrow."

"Dude, PLEASE quit it with the sappy pep talk." Idia moaned.

The Headmaster looked down at me. "Listen to me my little songbird, I'm aware of how the youths of today are into these 'bad-boy' types, but I absolutely forbid the union between you and Mr. Shroud! And Mr. Leech, and Mr. Ashengrotto for that matter! And do not get me started on how improper your attire is!"

Removing myself out of the Headmaster's covering, I groaned at his misplaced scolding. "Ugh, you're so annoying father."

'Who does the Headmaster think he is? My father? Oh and like I had any say in the outfit that was forced upon me! Which he would know, given that Ortho had some sort of video streaming thing around!' My frown disappeared as the Headmaster started grinning and I realized how eerily quiet the room had gotten.

"Why is everyone staring at me?" I asked nervously.

Headmaster Crowley preened "I do give off that air don't I? A father figure. Yes! Call me father to your heart's content!"

"You just called the Headmadge father!" Grim shouted from where he was next to a stunned Epel.

"False accusations much? I would never? You must have misheard me." I said sternly.

"No need for embarrassment fledgling, it's only natural that you, misguided and in need of stability, would see me in parental light. After all I have generously welcomed you with open arms and have graciously provided for you since day one and–"

I interrupt the Headmaster before this rumor can snowball out of proportion. "I must have misspoke, if anything I see you as a bother figure since you're always bothering me!"

Once Lilia had stretched to his satisfaction with a *pop* he chastised me. "Now, now, Thorn, show your father some respect."

I double down hearing snickers and poorly masked laughs. "I have not and would not call the Headmaster dad!"

"I called professor Crewel dad once." Deuce said, he looked lost in thought, perhaps he accidentally spoke out loud. Sucks to suck, I'm jumping on it.

"Guys jump on that - Deuce has daddy issues!"

Ace scoffed. "Old news! But you calling the Headmage daddy–"

"There was no 'daddy' spoken, a figment of your diseased imagination - self report much?" I smirked at Ace.

"ExcuSE ME?!" Ace yelled.

Seeing as the Headmage was too absorbed with starry eyes at the high praise, Trey took it upon himself to diffuse the situation. "Ace, you really outdid yourself back there!"

Ace took it. "Heh heh. That's right, you should be grateful. Especially since I had to make up for your terrible singing!"

"Please, forget that ever happened." Trey sighed tiredly.

Thanks to Trey's interference, everyone dropped the matter for the time being and instead discussed the events of what had transpired today.

"Thanks to your quick thinking, Rook, no one was hurt during the fight. I applaud your presence of mind." Jade said in his ever even tone and polite smile.

"Ah, Monsieur Prémédité! You would have undoubtedly done the same, were you in my shoes." Rook complemented back.

"No, Jade would've simply looked on and chuckled." Azul stated.

Rook nevertheless rephrased his praise. "Interesting. I suppose there is also beauty in leaving matters to fate."

"You're one powerful goldfishie! Seein' all that got me in the mood to throw down. C'mon, punch me a little." Floyd excitedly said, hovering in front of Riddle.

"This is not the time nor the place!" Riddle reprimanded.

"Aww, lame." Floyd slouched, walking off to find a new person or thing of interest.

Ortho released his brother from his embrace, Idia still high on escaping death loudly said, "those stupid ghosts are FINALLY gone. Sweet, sweet freedom!"

Ortho smiled with his eyes closed. "I'm so glad you're okay, Idia! You ought to thank Ace Trappola, and everybody else who came to your rescue."

"Ugh... Would've been nice if they hadn't cut it so close." Idia groaned.

"Excuse me?!" Ace gave Idia an incredulous look.

"Idia, come on! You always have to get in some smart remark, don't you?" Ortho lightly scolded.

"...j/k. Thanks." Idia said softly.

"What's with the sullen look? Is that how you thank people?" Ace asked.

"What? Is "thanks" not good enough for you? Would "thank you very much" suffice? Or maybe you'd prefer, "Allow me to extend my humblest of gratitudes"?" Idia mocked.

Ortho and I couldn't help but laugh at Idia's and Ace's antics.

"Still barely feels like you're thanking us." Ace replied.

"I mean it, tho. It was cool the way you swooped in like a manga hero. I couldn't hold a candle to that..." Idia looked off to the left.

Epel saw his change in expression and asked, "Idia, are you...upset?"

"I can't make cool speeches and talk sense into people like Ace does. Or Thorn. And I'm definitely not the kind of guy who'll swing into action for someone else." Idia elaborated.

"Oh, um... I was honestly just trying to impress Vil." Epel said, rubbing his arm.

"And I was doing it because of the rules and to get classes started back up. I wasn't really doing it for you..." Riddle added tactfully.

Idia ruffled his hair. "AUGH, I'm like the monster in some tragic tale! A hidden boss just minding my own business, chilling in my cave, until I get driven out and flee into town, where all the people fear me... I'm just not cut out to be the center of attention. *sigh*"

"Oh, please, Idia. You're super cool!" Ace said grinning in a friendly manner.

"Buh? Am I hearing things?" Idia looked around to make sure he wasn't hallucinating, judging by everyone else's bewildered eyes on Ace, he heard correctly.

"You are WEARING that tux. You can actually pull it off, unlike me 'n Epel over here. And since you're taller than Housewarden Riddle and Rook, your long jacket works great. I feel like I almost kinda get what the bride saw in you!" Ace looked Idia up and down in approvable.

"(Who are you and what have you done to Ace? Did Ace hit his head? Exhaustion from ghost busting all day finally setting in?)" I whispered to the other members of Team Tux.

"Wh... Wha... *sputter* Whoa, whoa, WHOA. What's gotten into you, Ace?!" Idia's hair threatened to swirl out of its styling.

"(I'm wondering the same thing myself. Why are you showering Idia with non-backhanded compliments? What's your angle?)" Riddle scrutinized Ace.

"Hey, I'm just stating the facts. Doesn't Idia look cool today?" Ace continued, gesturing to Idia.

"I can't argue with that..." Riddle said trailing off, unsure if Ace would spin this into an insult.

"(Also, the whole day culminated in him getting dumped at the altar. Who wouldn't feel sorry for the guy?)" Ace quietly muttered.

"Can't argue with that either." Riddle affirmed. Everyone boarded the Idia hype train.

"Your formal wear is most flattering. You cut an elegant figure standing as tall as you do. To be honest, I was shocked when I saw you. It's so radically different from your usual look. As the Ignihyde housewarden, you do justice to the King of the Underworld's spirit of diligence." Riddle praised.

"Your typical mien is quite lovely in its own right. It has a certain lonesome beauty, like a spring with nary a ripple on its surface. But today, that same beauty has taken on the shine of a brilliant jewel! Who would have guessed your pale blue flames hid such bewitching eyes? Would that you knew your own charm!" Rook enthusiastically said.

"I know what you mean. Idia's features are surprisingly decent. He's got that aloof, mature vibe going on." Ace added.

"Yeah, I was struck by that too. Plus, he's so towering and stylish... Your presence is really something right now, Idia. People would definitely think you were an actual adult!" Epel complimented sincerely.

Well since everyone else was boarding the Idia hype train, might as well get my ticket punched too. "Idia, I had to stare at you a lot today, and as a part of the collectible set you were pleasing to the eyes."

"Whoa... Okay, this is a LOT... Where's all this coming from? What's going on? Is the world ending?" The ends of Idia's hair were shades of pink and flowing this way and that from the attention.

"Eheheh! Eheheheheh! Yep, my brother's cool, all right! In fact, he's more than cool. He's also got amazing fashion sense! He's actually famous for it in gaming circles. His fans always post articles whenever he puts new gear sets together.

Lots of people want to be as cool as Gloomurai—that's my brother's handle. They copy his style all the time!" Ortho happily supplied.

I had a brilliant thought that I would be texting Idia later tonight, 'Idia stream dress to impress with me right fucking now.'

"Aww, cut it out... It's not...that big a deal..." Idia blushed, keeping his eyes off of everyone.

"I think it is, actually. The rest of us just wear outfits that've already been put together. You should take pride in your work. And for that matter, we didn't even manage to keep our suits in one piece. You, on the other hand, not only pulled off a highly difficult look, but made it your own. Hence, you are the most eligible bachelor of us all!" Riddle stated, smiling.

"Seriously...?" Idia asked slowly.

"Yeah!" Ace agreed.

"You really think so?! Look, I mean, I'm not that special. But you all keep talking about me like I'm the best, so what does that say about you? Sure, I pay some attention to detail, but I'm middling at most. Maybe I'm just the best option in THIS group." Idia clarified in a way that no one was prepared for.

"?!"

"I'm still mediocre, of course! I definitely don't merit the praise you're throwing my way. Dyeh heh... People did call me a "promising prodigy" when I was a kid. And I've only gotten better, so I guess it's no surprise. I might look impressive to SOME, but in the grand scheme of things I'm pretty low tier. So all this lavish praise makes me feel embarrassed, you know?! Dyeh heh heh." Idia laughed rubbing the back of his head.

"......"

"Well, you really are cool, Idia(...So long as your mouth is shut.)" Ace grumbled at the end, semi-regretting being the conductor of the hype train.

"That went by really quickly, but didn't parts of it feel a little scathing?" Epel raised an eyebrow to his teammates.

"For all his self-deprecation, he thinks rather highly of himself, doesn't he?" Riddle mused.

"I was entranced by how eloquent he was!" Rook called.

I chuckled, "sounds like Idia being Idia. At least he's not traumatized by this."

"Idia, I get that you're flustered, but you threw in some of those smart remarks again. And by "some," I mean a whole essay's worth." Ortho frowned at his brother.

"Ohoh! Ohohohoh! Well, an indoorsy type like me shouldn't be out here dropping fashion bombs on the fashionistas. So I'll leave you extroverts to congregate or whatever and retire to my sweet, beloved room!" Idia speed walked out of the cafeteria.

"Great. You do that." Ace said, crossing his arms, a bit miffed.

"Cater, let's get you back to the dorm!" Riddle announced in Cater's direction.

"Why me?" Cater asked, confused.

"You took second place in the croquet tournament yesterday! If you don't serve me tea before the day is out, you'll violate rule 703!"

Cater was caught off guard. "...... Wait, that's a rule?! No wonder you were so obsessed with the time. Talk about fastidious! Well, since you did save me and all, let's hustle back to the dorm!"

The Headmage spoke up. "My, my. What an eventful day this has been. There were many twists and turns, but everything's over and done with now, so we can put this whole thing behind us—"

"Come now, Headmage. Surely you could think of a more fitting closing line?" Rook inquired.

The Headmage coughed. "Ah! Yes, I suppose you're right. Ahem... And so the prince and princess lived happily ever after. The end."

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Everyone began to exit the cafeteria, ready to wash away and sleep off the day's endeavors, the Headmage spoke to himself at the sight of the wedding arrangements, "dear me. What a day this has been. And now the ghosts have vanished without bothering to break down the wedding decorations. How utterly irresponsible. Our students can hardly have lunch in here with things as they are. The Headmage singled out a particular group of people, "Freshmen, I'd like you all to take down the decorations before returning to your dorms."

"WHAT?!" The freshmen stopped in their tracks, staring back at their Headmage in disbelief.

"Everyone except Team Tux, right? Surely after all that, Epel and I are excused!" Ace bargained.

The Headmage was resolute in his description. "No, EVERY freshman must participate. A model teacher treats all students equally, and you'll find I'm the most consummate of educators!"

"Aww, man..." Epel groaned.

"Can't you cut me some slack?! I've already put in a TON of work. I'm dead on my feet over here!" Ace argued.

The Headmage sighed. "You did perform admirably today, it's true. But that's an entirely separate matter. Many hands make light work, as they say. It won't take long with so many energetic youths pooling their efforts."

Grim poked my arm. "Psst, Thorn! Don't just stand there! Let's give 'em the slip before the headmage remembers we're here."

I waved my heels at Grim. "One step ahead of you Grimmy, let's split." We tiptoed away, so far so good no one had noticed us. My hand had just touched the handle when the Headmage called out,"ah, and naturally, Thorn and Grim will be expected to contribute as well."

"Mraugh!" Grim cried out in alarm. I turned around and argued, "Headmaster I'm in a dress and heels, how am I supposed to clean in this type of rigid outfit? I was going to change and come right back."

"And Grim was to accompany you? While I don't doubt the sincerity of your reasoning, I have a quicker solution." A slight wave of his hand and I was back in my dorm uniform, damn.

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"So. Many. Ribbons. I've been taking them down forever, but I haven't made a dent!" Epel sagged, jumping and climbing chairs removing the gaudy things.

"These lace streamers get stuck on my claws when I try to pull them down!" Grim swatted his paws trying to shake them off.

Ace grunted. "How HEAVY can these chairs be? What are they made of, solid rock? ...Wait, they're tombstones! Talk about yikes."

I crossed Ace with a pile of expensive dishes in my arms. "Exactly! And Sebek had the gall to get upset with me for not being able to move them or free myself from being tied to a literal rock!" I sighed, "I just wanna sleeeeeeeep."

"Cheer up, everyone! I'll pitch in too!" Ortho chimed, taking a few dishes off the adjacent table.

Ace vented his frustrations as he pushed another tombstone. "Ugh, this is ridiculous! I already worked my tail off, and now I'm stuck doin' this?! Those lousy ghosts are such a pain, no ifs, ands, or buts! They've been around for, what, five centuries? And they've been obsessed with love the whole time? That's nuts, I tell ya. The retainers were bad enough, but their princess? I'll never understand what was going through her head. Sure would've saved ME a whole lotta headache if she'd just let the marriage thing go and enjoyed the afterlife."

"...Ace, have you ever had...feelings for someone?" Epel tentatively asked, stepping down from his chair.

Ace stopped mid push and leaned his body over the stone as he looked at Epel, "huh? Where'd that come from?"

"You're saying it's "nuts" and talking about how you don't "understand" it. That's a little surprising to me. I thought you'd be an expert on affairs of the heart and all that."

"Heh. What makes you ask a thing like that Epel?" I didn't wait for a response as I busied myself with picking up a few stray pieces of wedding stuff off the floor a bit further away.

"What, you think I'm some kind of flirt?" Ace questioned, one eyebrow raised.

Epel waved his arms in front of himself. "I-I didn't mean it like that!"

Grim gave his two cents. "Boy, you're barkin' up the wrong tree askin' Ace about romance. He's not gonna know the first thing about that mushy stuff! Nobody with a modicum of sense would touch an unruly meanie like him with a 10-foot pole."

"I know you're jealous, but you don't gotta be so obvious about it. I'll have you know, I had a girlfriend back in middle school. We'd go out to movies and the amusement park." Ace reminisced on those not so long ago days.

"Seriously?! What kinda magic trick did you pull to make that happen?" Grim balked.

Walking back I hit Ace with a judging look, "you gave your right hand pronouns and you did it in public places?"

"Thorn you can really be such a–" He took the pile of ribbons out of Epel's hands and yeeted them at me. Whether from my comment or spitting out Ace's surprise ribbon attack, laughs rang out as we paused to chat.

Ortho backed up Ace. "According to my manual, movie theaters and amusement parks are classic date spots!"

"Y'know, it's real nice swappin' stories like this. Nothin' beats some good ol'-fashioned guy talk! So? What happened?" Epel was clearly invested in this story.

'Is it really alright for me to be listening in on guy talk...?' I try my best to stay within range of the conversation, not to look rude, and pretend to be busy folding spider lace fabrics so I don't have to participate.

"Well... She said the thrill rides were too scary for her, so we just went on the merry-go-round and the Ferris wheel. She gushed about how cute it all was, and took a bunch of pics for Magicam, but I still don't get what was so fun about it. And the only stuff we saw at the theater were romances and animal movies. She vetoed all the action and horror flicks. Hanging out was just plain boring, so I stopped contacting her as time went on." Ace said, looking up as he recalled the memories.

"Huh. That's a mite underwhelming." Epel sighed.

Ace continued his story. "The worst part came later. Can you guess what happened once I distanced myself? One day, a bunch of girls called me completely out of the blue. I didn't even know who they were. "Why aren't you calling?" "Our poor friend!" "She's been crying this whole time!" "You heartless jerk!" They gave me the whole third degree! What's up with THAT? That's when I learned a valuable lesson: romance is way more trouble than it's worth! It's way more fun just chillin' with my male friends."

My face screwed up and I quickly schooled my expression before anyone could notice. 'Did Ace even like his girlfriend? And he still doesn't know why that was inappropriate? Avoiding the first years in my farming otome points: ✅ Immature brats.'

"I just learned a valuable lesson too: you're a big baby." I high fived Grim and added "infant for real, sounds like a skill issue."

Ace rolled his eyes at Grim. "Whatever, dude. You're the least likely of us to have any kinda romance. And Thorn you're starting to sound like the Ignihyde prefect. If you wanna talk bein' clueless about love... I'm pretty sure that applies to those guys more than me." Ace gestured with his head to Deuce, and Jack.

"What are you on about, Ace?" Deuce questioned, setting his broom aside.

Jack moaned, folding a tablecloth. "Ugh... It's past midnight. I'm barely awake as it is. Let's just get the cafeteria cleaned up already."

"You had plenty of time to sleep when you were lying around on the floor. Think about it, Grim—who's clueless here? Me, or all these guys who botched their one job?" Ace nudged Grim.

Grim mulled it over for a moment. "Hmm. You do got a point... I'd say Deuce was the lamest, since he froze in front of the bride like that, he even did that when my henchman changed clothes, good grief."

"Right?! I couldn't breathe, I was laughing so hard." Ace snickered.

Deuce locked eyes with Ace. "Wha... LOOK. What do you want from me?! I'm not used to talking to girls. I started to worry I'd say the wrong thing and hurt her feelings. Then I lost track of what I was saying at all."

"Didn't you go to co-ed schools before? I'm surprised you weren't a girl magnet, actually. I thought the ladies went wild for bad boys." Ace stared back.

"Wild? No, they didn't really talk to me. Any girls other than my mom—any guys too, really— would take off the moment I made eye contact with 'em." Deuce answered truthfully.

Ace nodded. "Ah, I get it. You were just that intimidating. Considering Jack got rejected right away too, I guess the scary-guy look doesn't draw that much romantic attention after all."

"Leave me out of this. I'm perfectly fine not getting much romantic attention." Jack grumbled, doing his best to stay awake and move other such wedding items.

Ace followed Jack with his head. "Oh, is that a fact? Sour grapes much?"

Jack paused his work and made his way over to the gossip circle. "It's not about ego. Wolf beastmen only have one special someone, ever. That's how it was for my parents and grandparents. They're never apart, from when they wake up to when they go to bed. They walk together, eat together...you name it. I'm sure I'll be the same. When I fall in love with someone, I'll want to be with them for life. So I don't need lots of attention."

Ace groaned. "Dude, are you gonna start talking about mortgages next?! You're still in school and you're already talking about "for life" and stuff? You take romance WAY too seriously!"

"You're also assuming you'll get married. You don't even know what you're gonna do for a living." Deuce pointed out.

"Geez Louise! I'd never wanna date Jack." Grim's outburst took me off guard.

"I'm sure the feeling is mutual." I said between laughs.

"It's none of your business anyway!" Jack said, ears twitching.

"I guess Epel's the most likely girl magnet out of all of us then. He's the opposite of intimidating, and he's a pretty guy with a bright future." Ace said looking at said pretty boy.

"You're talking about me?!" Epel blushed flustered.

"We told you about us, now it's your turn to share. Were you into anyone back home?" Ace pressed.

"Well, um..." Epel floundered.

"C'mon, you can't hold out on your tux-pal!" Ace grinned.

"Don't try to act all buddy-buddy with him. Why are you so hung up on our love lives, anyway?" Deuce questioned, analyzing Ace's motives.

"Probably a stalling tactic. He wants us to finish the work while he chats." Jack crossed his arms.

"Just the kind of cheap trick Ace would pull." Deuce agreed, joining Jack's disapproval.

"You guys are just as curious as me, and you know it!" Ace called their bluff.

"Well..." They started, remaining in the circle awaiting Epel's response.

"Has anyone ever said they like you? Have you ever had a crush? Did you ever date anyone?!" Ace hounded.

Epel ripped the bandaid off. "....I hate to dash your hopes, but... There aren't many people where I'm from. Everyone was either way older or younger than me. I didn't really talk with many people my age until I came to Night Raven College. I spent most of my time doin' farm work— ah, I mean, assisting with my family's business. So I don't have any exciting stories to share."

"Man, nothing from you either, huh?" Ace said.

"Sorry to disappoint." Epel replied.

Ortho piped up. "You four are greatly lacking in formative adolescent experiences compared to data from other boys your age."

"Ortho, you cooked with that one." I said chuckling.

"Shaddup!" Ace loudly said.

"Hey, humans! You've been lollygagging for the past several minutes. Cease your frivolous chatter and move more of these chairs!" Sebek barked, pulling four tombstones at once without so much as breaking a sweat.

As he marched off, Ace said, "here he is, folks. Our number-one worst contender."

Jack nodded. "Yeah, he disappointed me too."

"Yeah, whatever personality disease he has I hope he gets better." I added.

Sebek joined our circle with a huff. "Hmph. All you've been talking about is sentimental drivel. We're students. We should be studying, not wasting our time with such unacademic pursuits!"

Grim shot back, "I don't gotta take that from you, bub! You were shot down right out the gate!"

"I was NOT. It was I who did the shooting down! My schedule is already packed with training so I can protect Malleus. There's no room for romance." Sebek decreed.

"Sure, but what if you happen to meet someone you totally gel with? Are you gonna yammer on about Malleus nonstop again?" Ace asked.

"I have a plan for that. Lilia has taught me a suitable course of action if someone commands my attentions. FIRST, I SHALL PEN THEM A MISSIVE!" Sebek proudly stated.

Ace teased Sebek. "Pen a missive? You mean write a letter? Okay grandpa, you gonna take her for a buggy ride next?"

Deuce put his hand on his chin. "Couldn't you send them a Magicam DM or text like a normal person?"

Sebek almost blanched at such a crude substitution. "Why would I do that? Lilia says a fountain pen and stationery are the true weapons in matters of love. I shall pen my feelings, slip a photo of my smiling visage into every third missive, and repeat this until the twenty-fifth full moon. Once we have exchanged a sufficient amount of correspondence... I shall then sit next to them on a bench in Briar Valley Central Park, with a person's worth of space between us!"

Epel patted Sebek's shoulder, "Lilia's definitely been messing with you."

"WHAT?! HOW DARE YOU QUESTION LILIA'S INTEGRITY, HUMAN!" Sebek fired back fiercely.

"Ugh, you're making my ears ring. We're gonna be here all night if we get into that, so let's just drop it. Whew... Y'know, I think Sebek had a point about one thing." Ace said.

"You're into writing letters too?" Jack tiredly asked.

I excitedly interjected. "Absolutely! I'd be so into a handwritten letter, written with several glitter ink pens with cutesy drawings and words like 'I'm in l♡ve l♡ve with y♡u.' and some literary references." I mask my laugh pretending to clear my throat.

"Oh, sure. I get my unicorn-and-rainbow stationery, and scrawl "my beloved" in fancy cursive—yeah, no. Not that part! At the end of the day, Housewarden Riddle and Rook bailed out me 'n Epel, right?" Ace looked at the other member of Team Tux.

"For sure. We wouldn't have gotten anywhere if they hadn't shown up when they did." Epel acknowledged.

Ace continued. "When I saw our housewarden taking down all those ghosts single-handed, I thought to myself... "MAN, what a cool guy." It makes me wanna get better at using magic. Maybe right now I can't hold a candle to our housewarden or the older students... But one of these days, I'm gonna show 'em something spectacular and be all like, "In your FACE!" Gives me a rush just thinking about how they'll look when they see my sick spellcasting. But if I wanna get there, I'm gonna have to buckle down and take my studies seriously. I can't let romance distract me."

"I know just what you mean!" Epel said, determination in his features.

"Hmph. You're more sensible than I'd imagined.' Sebek crossed his arms.

"Yeah, I should probably get serious about my studies too." Deuce casually remarked.

"When even a student as bad as Deuce is saying it, you know we're on to something." Jack teased.

"True that." Ace agreed.

"How come you two only agree when you're dumping on me?!" Deuce exclaimed.

Ace looked at me, "Hey wait a minute! What about you Thorn? You must have something given your teasing, or are you another lame-o?"

I thought for a moment and decided to answer truthfully. "To be honest, I was popular with most people, but I get the feeling that due to our differences our experiences would be too different to compare... You didn't think I was odd in a dress?"

"You? Yeah right, everything about you is odd, what's one more oddity to add to the collection? Enough joking around Thorn, it's not like you'd be alone in the solo-boat." Ace 'sympathetically' put one arm around my shoulder.

"I wouldn't say you looked odd, given the circumstances. You were so cool in your disguise and the way you carried yourself, I thought you were a real princess-y girl." Deuce enthusiastically said.

Epel agreed, "for sure! It takes a real man to set aside his pride to dress like a woman to save his friend! (Or anyone in this case.)"

Ortho spoke up. "I can validate Thorn's statement; If Thorn presented how they did today, someone would confess their undying love for them at least once a month, of course not counting the other confessions they would receive within the month. In addition, the data I have collected from @ caterd.updates magicam posts can concur."

"You can't be serious? Thorn Silvanus is that eligible? I'll see it when I believe it." Ace took out his phone to conduct his own research, the others followed suit.

"Whoa! Wouldya look at these numbers?! But all the comments are complimenting ya and askin' ya out like you're a girl." Epel handed me his phone. "Tough break, it's not easy being a cute guy." Epel patted my shoulder.

Sebek grimaced while reading the comments on Cater's post. "What utter nonsense,

[are you looking for a dog? ૮⍝• ᴥ •⍝ა Bark bark]

or

[I licked my screen 👅💦💦]

Sebek's face screwed up. "The rest are much too bold that I dare not read such depraved filth out loud."

I forced out the fakest sounding laugh, "let's move onto something else." (I'm dreading opening up my own magicam; thankfully it's set to private, but my message requests are going to be weird or f r e a k y, I just know it.)

A lull in the conversation followed. It didn't feel right keeping my 'secret' from the first years, seeing how supportive they've been. "It makes sense that I would receive those types of comments, I am a woman after all."

Wide eyes looked at me in confusion, followed by noises of questioning, except for Ace who just laughed, and Ortho who had no facial reaction to the statement.

"Good one Thorn!" Ace wheezed between laughs, "you really perfected your comedic timing!"

"Fynna? No way my henchman is a girl, Thorn doesn't look cute like a girl at all!" Grim shook his head.

"Thanks for making sure I don't get a big head about my appearance, Grim." I eyerolled.

"Heh. Anytime!" The cat grinned ignorantly.

Sebek interjected, "prove it!"

I turned to Sebek, crossing my arms. "Shall I flash you my brassier, ye ol' pervert? Why would I lie?" Sebek was left speechless at that rebuttal.

"Are you serious?! Ughhh! Just when I thought I finally met a guy that understands the curse of being cute! Turns out they're a girl!" Epel lamented in dramatic fashion.

I patted Epel's shoulder. "I'm sorry to have deceived you, Epel." I looked up at the group, "I wasn't trying to lie to you guys. I felt it was in my best interest to keep this to myself, but if we're all going to be friends, trust goes both ways. I don't even think the Headmadge knows." I took in a breath. "Staying here might be my only way of returning home."

The air was tense for a moment. "You're being genuine." Jack stated, still looking perplexed but understanding.

Deuce was looking at me in a mix of horror and fascination, face turning pink.

"You're being serious?! For real, for real?!" Ace questioned, no longer laughing.

I let out an over the top evil laugh, "now you all know my terrible secret! Mwahahaha!"

Jack rubbed the back of his head, "it's fine if you're a girl Thorn, we don't care."

"Huuuh?"

Jack elaborated, "we'll keep treating you how we used to as to not be suspect, don't worry about it, it's nothing."

Sebek coughed, "I'd like to suggest we take an oath, to guard Silvanus' secret and to ensure their safety as a girl attending an all-boy's school." A few nods followed.

Ortho chimed in, "this could be the starting of a cool secret friendship club - let's call it the 'Princess Protection Program' or 'PPP' for short!"

I giggled at Ortho's proposal, "I'm not a princess though, just a girl."

Ace scoffed, flashing his screen at me. "Tell it to Cater's magicam post."

Deuce spoke quietly. "Thorn has helped me, us, a lot, I'm sure they had their reasons, and... Shhh-e's my friend."

Epel was next, "although we don't know one another very well, I wouldn't betray the trust you placed in me! As a man, that wouldn't be right!"

Jack crossed his arms nodding his head, "I second that."

"Thank you." I said with a smile. I didn't realize how being disingenuous would weigh on me. My eyes sting from the feeling of tears threatening to spill. I petted Grim to distract myself.

Ace just shrugged and changed the subject. "Aw, crud. We've been so busy talking, we haven't made any progress cleaning up. Those ghosts made us look like a joke, and now we're stuck working late after school... We're kinda lame, aren't we? We didn't have a single cool moment today."

"That's not true at all!" Ortho stepped to the center of our semi-circle.

"Huh?"

"I was monitoring the video feed with the headmage when you entered the wedding hall, Ace Trappola. It was just like a movie when you burst in with your bouquet and shouted, "STOP THE WEDDING!" You were truly invested in saving my brother... And it was SOOO COOL!" Ortho praised with stars in his eyes.

Ace crossed his arms and looked off to the side. "Well, I wasn't exactly invested. I was more caught up in the moment after escaping all those ghosts."

Ortho shook his head, "I disagree. You looked very intent when you rushed into the wedding hall. And when you spoke to the bride and her retainers, that was from the heart, wasn't it?"

"There ain't no way Ace is some shining white knight at heart. He was prolly just doin' what he usually does— spoutin' off a buncha stuff he doesn't believe."

"Y... Yeah! You get me, Grim!" Ace stuttered.

Ortho came prepared with receipts. "Judging by the elevated body heat my IR sensor detected, as well as his voice level and pupil dilation... Every possible data metric points to Ace having been sincere. You don't have to hide it, you know! You're so modest."

"So that means..." Deuce started,

"All those things he said to the Ghost Bride about the perfect partner..." Sebek pieced,

"He actually believed them?!" Jack completed.

"Who was on your mind Ace?" I 'innocently' asked. Ace looked away from me right away with his cheeks flushing pink.

"Yup. Beyond a shadow of a doubt. It's so cool how you have such a clear vision of your perfect partner." Ortho nodded, ending the powerpoint.

Ace waved his hands about. "What?! No I don't! I don't got a romantic bone in my body! That was pure improv! I just said whatever I thought the ghost lady would buy. REALLY now."

Grim chuckled, "protestin' an awful lot, ain't ya?"

"Even the headmage said you were positively endearing! Based on my statistical analysis and a review of literature in this field, I conclude that if you declare your love as ardently as you did today... You'd unquestionably win anyone's heart!" Ortho exclaimed.

"I'm not ardent, okay? And I don't do declarations of love! Would you guys quit it with those smug grins?!" Ace complained.

"Wow, I didn't know how heartfelt you were... It sounds like you were really cool. I wish I could've seen it." Epel said wistfully.

"Don't worry! I made a full recording. I'll send you the video later." Ortho tapped the side of his head.

"Stop recordin' us like that!" Ace shouted.

"Ooh, good thinking. Let's watch it together once we're done. Ramshackle Dorm work for you all?" Deuce looked around with a smirk.

"A group watch sounds fun, actually. I'm already feeling more awake." Jack stretched.

"I shall join them in taking your measure! You called me the number one worst contender. I hope you're prepared for a rigorous assessment." Sebek grinned darkly.

"I don't wanna star in movie night!" Ace's face was turning a light shade of red.

"You got to watch our attempts from the sports field, plus everyone already thinks you were cool. We won't tease you... Much." I added.

Ortho agreed. "Yeah! Ace Trappola, you've seriously considered what the perfect marriage means to you. You're the most eligible bachelor of all!"

"You gotta be kiddin' me... None of that was the slightest bit sincere. Honest!" Ace half whined.

"Whoa. Ace's blushin' so hard, his ears are turnin' red." Grim pointed with his paw.

"Ha ha, you're right. Don't see that every day." Deuce laughed.

Jack nudged Ortho. "Hey, Ortho. You should record this too."

"Why's everyone gotta mess with me like this! Seriously, can't we move on already?!" Ace squatted low to the ground in an attempt to hide his embarrassment and avoid any smug teasing looks.

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Once everyone was properly dressed for our midnight movie, we reconvened at Ramshackle. Jack wore a white button down shirt, an oversized knitted beige cardigan, and off green sweatpants. Sebek wore a traditional dark green silk pajama set with white accents complete with matching eye mask, hat, and silk robe. Epel wore a loose white shirt with bold black text that read "an apple a day keeps anyone away if you throw hard enough." Paired with light purple shorts that had different stages of an apple being eaten for a pattern. I was wearing the pajamas I had won from Ace, a plain white shirt covered by a black hoodie with white roses dripping in red paint graphic, and red flannel pajama bottoms. Ortho remained the same.

We made light work of shifting around the furniture to make one big 'bed' so as to thoroughly enjoy our movie and optimize going to sleep right after. Much to Ace's dismay the devil may work hard, but NRC student's that want to tease someone work much harder. Of course we all had to take a group photo to commemorate our first ever first year sleepover. 'The first of many' my caption read, tagged with: @ ace.ofthe.court, @ magicalwheels4lifer, @ moonlitxtrack00, @ cheerinja, @ muscles.n.apples, @ number1.malleus.draconia.stan, and @ thegreatgrimsorcererextrodinare.

I sat next to Ace on the couch, as everyone was settling in and getting comfortable, Grim then proceeded to blind Ace and I with my (our) phone's camera flash. Blinking away the little spots in my eyes I asked the ball of fur, "why did you just take a photo of Ace and I?"

Ace rubbed his eyes. "What was that for?!"

Grim covered his mouth with his paw as he cackled, "Mryahaha! You two look like you're wearing a matching couples outfit! Pfft–"

Ace groaned, rubbing his hands over his face as the "ooooohs" and teasing remarks followed.

Sebek intervened, "premarital sitting together is not permitted, have you no shame Trappola?!" Ace and I just looked at one another confused, until Sebek took my hand and pulled me up to sit next to him and Epel. Sebek attempted to maintain some distance between us on the cramped couch, while Epel just shrugged.

"Okay ready guys? I'm going to start playing the movie." Ortho launched his projection on the wall, and the rest of the night was filled with laughter and snoring.

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A hand flew to suppress his gasp as he read the photo caption again. The puzzle pieces in his mind clicked.

"A princess in a villain school...? No, this can't be true... Then again..."

Neige Leblanche consolidated with his friends on the matter, to assess whether or not his suspicions were validated and if his new friend needed help.

A man wearing a varsity jacket with a bow and arrow designed back crossed his arms. "Given your rose colored outlook on life, if they really are as 'wonderful' as you say, shouldn't you be asking yourself why they chose to attend Night Raven College rather than Royal Sword Academy?"

A red haired man excitedly squealed, "you could invite them to our annual winter ball! 'Enchantment Under the Twinkling Snow'!" With a dreamy sigh he added, "think how romantic the atmosphere will be."

Neige turned seven shades of scarlet from his blush. "Rielle!"

Che'nya gave his signature mischievous grin, "I think it's a purrfect idea."

A man with golden earrings interrupted. "Um, have you thought this through?" Wrapping one arm around Che'nya he acted out a scenario, "'hey Headmadge Ambrosia, meet the NRC student I smuggled across the RSA boundary."

A few laughs followed.

A tall man rolled his eyes at his friend's antics. "All Neige is asking for is a chance for Thorn Silvanus. Doesn't everyone deserve a chance?"

Some murmurs of agreement came about.

Neige had made up his mind, with some of his friends over his shoulder, they would craft the perfect invitation for the 'Enchantment Under the Twinkling Snow' ball.

[daydreaminsnow]

[Pardon me for sending a message at this late hour, but I could not wait till morning.]

[I would like to formally invite you to Royal Sword Academy's annual winter ball. The date is the winter solstice.]

[I would arrange for your ticket and transportation of course!]

[We can schedule a call or a meetup to discuss things further if you'd prefer 😊]

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Chapter Text

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Intermission 1:

☆ Play Stupid Games, Win Stupid Prizes ☆

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I let out a sigh as I glance around the board game room. Everyone else was getting fired up in their game play while I was left feeling drained playing twst’s version of Monopoly with two sinfully boring men.

“Not that I’m not riveted to the spot playing ‘Proprietorship’ but can’t we play something more engaging… Doesn’t Twisted Wonderland have any video games?”

“Quiet! (I’m counting…)” Azul mumbled, eyes never leaving the board as he concentrated on strategizing his victory.

“Don’t hurt yourself.” I eye rolled.

Idia thumbed through his cards. “Just considering your best interests normie, since you know nothing of Twisted Wonderland’s games we gotta start on easy mode with parental controls.”

I side eyed Idia. “You two still owe me from that whole ghostly groom-napping. And I’ve decided I want to play a video game with you two.”

“What could I possibly OWE you? If anything YOU OWE ME for having to rescue you as well!” Azul quipped, head turning sharply in my direction.

“Don’t start Azul! You failed! Became a Slapsville citizen, and I had to rescue YOU by the end!” I stood from my chair pointing at Azul.

Azul’s face grew flush from anger as he also rose from his seat. “I seem to recall a certain SOMEONE asking to reward their savior with a kiss?!”

Sensing an oncoming argument from Azul and I, and not wanting to relive *that* Idia snapped. “Ok fine! Let’s go to my dorm room, I’ll teach you how to be a pro gamer!”

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Idia’s room could best be categorized as ‘disorganized otaku’ - so the average otaku room experience. Posters lined the walls, and despite having an impressive hexagonal bookcase, topped with anime figurines and a Pain and Panic plushies, stray books littered the floor. Actually with so many clusters of half open boxes and cables, the floor was more like a mini labyrinth. There was a gigantic holographic-pod-chamber that looked like a prop straight from a sci-fi film that sat to the left of Idia’s desk. Maybe that was an elaborate 3D printer or a charging station for Ortho? Directly in front of his bookcase was his pc desk with at least four floating holographic monitors open, complete with *the* gamer chair. The chair, and keyboard were infused with rainbow led lights. His closet door and drawers were left open with clothes hastily shoved in. His bed matched the secondary theme of the room; dark blues, greys and blacks. The blankets and sheets were in disarray, and on the side that touched the wall was either a lamp or a tablet that had been clipped into the bed frame as a hands free device.

Ortho, who had been milling about in the room, turned his head upon hearing our arrival. “Big brother! Thorn! Ashengrotto. Good job big brother on inviting friends over.” Ortho gave a thumbs up and winked.

Idia made an indignant squeak and Azul just chuckled, pushing up his glasses.

I smiled at Ortho. “Hi Ortho! I’m here to learn how to play video games, care to join?”

“(thank the great seven for Ortho… Less socializing for me!)” Idia muttered and thrifted through his room.

Ortho nodded. “Mmm! You came to the right person: my big brother is a certified gaming expert; there’s nothing you can’t learn with Gloomurai as your teacher.”

As Idia moved the monitors to face the side of his bed, Azul made a comment. “I’ve heard online streaming is becoming more popular - this could be a wonderful business opportunity for you Gloomurai.”

“(Helping yourself, you mean…)” Idia glared at his ‘friend.’

“Let’s all commemorate your first time playing with other people physically by recording it, as a fun memory to look back on!” Ortho suggested.

Idia sighed and gave his younger brother a wispy smile, “sure Ortho. (I’ll record alright, not clicking live though, no way I’m leaving a digital footprint with these two betas.)”

“Oh! Senpai! I know I said I wanted to learn a Twisted Wonderland game but…” I started typing on Idia’s rainbow light up keyboard. “Ortho was telling me about how you’ve got an eye for fashion, and I thought,” with a right click of the mouse pad ‘Dress to Impress’ was loaded on the screen. “We could try playing this super trendy game where I’m from!”

“...Thorn who do you take us for? Isn’t this a kid's game?” Azul questioned, sitting down on the edge of the bed.

“Ah! You would think so, but there’s strategizing to appeal to the judges who are also our competitors, underhanded tactics to ensure a clean sweep with a touch of luck. As much as it's about fashion, it gets cutthroat, petty, and biased. With us as a team, we’ll wipe the floor with these outmoded noobs!” I passionately explain.

Azul crossed his arms, “hm, your egotistical tendencies are rubbing off on Thorn.”

“Heh, it’s true I excel at coordinating outfits, maximizing their in-game properties while simultaneously keeping them ultramodern,” Idia cracked his knuckles, “I’ll show you how it's done. (Whoooa, I totally just delivered a badass cool guy protagonist line!!)”

“I’ll generate some V-cam models so you can match with me, @ Cheerinja and @ Gloomurai!” Ortho said, eyes turning blue as he compiled a data spreadsheet and projected some models for @ Azzurrpod (Azul) and @ Alienprotag (Thorn) to choose from.

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After the first round, everyone had become invested in obtaining a spot on the podium by any means necessary. Even after we realized Idia had accidentally hit live instead of record, we made the most of it and carried on. As the game play grew more intense, we huddled in closer on the bed, Azul scooting in closer off the edge next to Idia, I was on his other side and Ortho was next to me. Gloomurai’s viewership continued going up, with chat spamming messages and gifts, as we bickered amongst ourselves and them.

Our theme this round was ‘pirate’ it was Azul’s turn with the controller, and he ate I fear. Our character was practically a siren in sea captain’s gear.

A smooth male computer generated voice read out a gift message from @ Shiiok.ing. “Captain Jack Spare-no-food.” [Donated 1 Madol]

Azul was not pleased and swiftly delivered a “moderators, expel that guy right now.”

The way in which Azul said it made me want to tease him, so I put on a silly voice and said “Mr. Electric, send this man to the principal's office and have him expelled immediately!”

Idia and Ortho did nothing to silent their laughter.

Before Azul could say anything, another message came in, from @ Whimsqueeze. “Azzurrpod, you’re built like my 83 y/o grandma.” [Donated 1 Madol]

“Unless your 83 year old grandma is 5’9 and ripped, no I’m not.” Azul wasn’t having any of it.

@ Shiiok.ing added ““5’9 sideways.” [Donated 1 Madol]

“WHO TF SAID THAT?” Azul’s eyes instantly locked onto the usernames, he recognized these two jokers. He banned them from commenting for the rest of the stream.

As I hit them with pose #28, I half-heartedly tried to comfort Azul. “Man really spent 1 madol to type that out.”

“Tch. Yeah.” Azul went back to focusing on the game.

During the next round, we were able to choose a theme, and every theme I recommended was shown no mercy.

“No, absolutely not.”

“Yeah. Do better. Try harder.”

“According to my research, those themes aren’t popular. But good try!”

I was shot down so quick I just looked around at the group and deadpanned “so should I k*ll myself?”

Idia and Azul were caught off guard and laughed, Ortho however did not and asked me to never make that type of joke again. I agreed.

Finally, the theme had been announced. A singular word was on screen. ‘Cat.’

“What clown put that in?” I asked, slightly ticked.

“That’s Idia’s theme.” Azul helpfully supplied.

“You guys gave me grief for ‘princess’ and ‘picnic’ but ‘cat’ is somehow better?!” I started.

In the middle of our bickering, the automated voice read a gift message from @ Obnoxiou_thingg. “Kittens can you count down for me? I’m almost finished.” [Donated 50 Madol]

The room went quiet. While Azul and Idia had equally looks of shock and disgust. Ortho and I were lost.

“There’s a timer on screen though? Can you not see it?” Ortho said this and double checked to make sure that the screen recording was still working.

I added, “finished what? Using our gameplay as background noise to cook a cake or something? Just use a proper timer?”

Chat spammed ‘r/whoosh’ as Idia and Azul looked at Ortho and I in a mix of relief and concern.

Idia’s hair flickered red and using a deep voice changer he yelled “GET OFF OF THE CHANNEL!”

Ortho, Azul, and I laughed harder before going back to gameplay.

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Once our live ended, Ortho stepped out to take care of some other tasks while Azul and Idia eventually came to an agreement on which video game was the best Twisted Wonderland had to offer.

Idia was recharging with some gamer fuel, cute mini candy makers and sugary drinks.

“It's like playing a game irl.” He grinned, mixing the highly saturated liquid with the smallest spoon known to man.

Once the glowing green gummy worms had set, Iida offered Azul and I some. Azul made a face at that. We brought our attention back to the monitor.

‘Final Kingdom’ An open rpg that featured a wide roster of unique characters with a compelling ever-changing plot with high stakes, battles, gacha, otome moments, and based on the player’s strategic gameplay - offered almost no two gameplays alike. The visuals and music were nothing short of cinematic. In my opinion, it was reminiscent of Fire Emblem x Monster Hunter. Of course, for the grand experience, Idia took us all the way back to the prologue.

“Can you two extras stop pressing up against me?” Idia fidgeted in between Azul and I, the tips of his hair turning pink.

“Do you think anyone enjoys doing this? Invest in actual chairs and we wouldn't be in this predicament.” Azul berated, purposely pressing into Idia’s side more.

“(The calculated possibility for people visiting was less than 0.01%.)” Idia gripped.

“Four floating screens and only one that actually shows gameplay, cut us a break senpai." I said.

“Ugh.” Idia dropped the matter and continued guiding me through the controls and in-game lore and explaining any cultural references. Sometimes Azul would butt in just to argue with Idia’s knowledge. Ortho wasn’t kidding when he said his brother was like a teacher, it was very easy to follow along.

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It was late into the night, and it felt like we had barely scratched the surface of gameplay.

Azul looked at his watch and said, “not that this isn’t invigorating, but I’ve got other business to take care of. So, if you’ll excuse me.”

Azul attempted to leave when Idia shot back. “Heh, what’s the matter Azul? Malding ‘cause the noob is a better player than you?”

“Past your wittle baby bedtime?” I smirked.

Azul rolled his eyes. “Unlike you two I’ve got a lounge, clients-”

“Wah, wah, wah, give it a rest will ya baby?” I teased, despite feeling tired myself.

Idia added. “It's the first boss. But it's probably out of your expertise, of course you must have planned for this with your strategic exit.”

Azul snatched the controller and sat back down.

The first boss battle was beyond difficult. Even when Azul and I begrudgingly worked together, (read: hurled insults at one another) the monster remained undefeated. We wordlessly agreed and passed the controller to Idia.

As Idia played, I heard soft snores coming from Azul’s side. I glanced over and sure enough he was asleep. I looked up to Idia and he made no indication that he noticed. I yawned as I decided to rest my eyes. I’ll open them again whenever Idia eliminates the first boss.

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“UHH?!” Was the noise Idia let out upon realizing he was trapped between his two sleeping board game buddies.

‘Whatdoidowhatdoidowhatdoidowhatdoidowhatdoido?’ Flashed in Idia’s malfunctioning brain. He attempted to wiggle his way out, moving backwards so the duo wouldn’t hit the floor, but he ended up falling backwards instead, causing the pair to lay on his chest.

A high-pitched whistle was let out as his hair turned a deep set rose color.

‘How do I keep finding myself in these overrun cliche anime tropes?! I’m just an introverted social outcast! This shouldn’t happen to guys like me! HSDJKGSCUHASOI.’

Thank and praise the Great Seven that Ortho had returned! Idia mouthed the words ‘save me brother.’

Ortho blinked and silently giggled and projected the message:

[Your socialization is leveling up. I’m proud of you big brother! I’m just here to return a book I borrowed. Good night!]

Idia resigned to his fate and passed out from embarrassment.

Before Ortho left, he tucked the trio into bed and took a photo of Idia’s first sleepover.

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The pair had subconsciously managed to use Idia as a mattress. The accidental cuddle pile was as follows: Azul’s head lay on Idia’s chest with his limbs outstretched, wrapped around Idia and Thorn - hugging them close. Thorn’s head rested slightly above Azul’s, while Idia felt comforted by the pressure and had both his arms rested on the backs of the prefects.

Idia and Azul were the first ones to wake up. Their eyes bugged out once conscious enough to take in the situation and frantically, yet silently, pulled away as to not disrupt Thorn.

“(What are YOU doing? What were WE DOING?)” Azul whispered and shouted.

“(You two fell asleep and pinned me! I couldn’t move!)” Idia whined quietly.

I rolled over and rubbed my head into the ‘pillow’ in an attempt to relax. ‘Are Grim and the ghosts arguing again? Ugh I don’t care, I’m sleepy, can’t they argue away from a sleeping person?’

After Thorn let out a huff, the duo picked up where they stopped.

“(SO WAKE US UP??!)” Azul countered, fixing up his attire.

“(Azul I tried! I passed out from your normie germs.)” Idia informed, turning his head as far as he could away from Thorn’s.

“Hmm? Azul’s here…?” I mumbled. Still not entirely awake.

“(WHAT. ARE. YOU. DOING?)” Idia whispered shrieked, vibrating in fear as Azul took out his phone.

“(Isn’t it obvious? Collecting insurance.)” Azul’s glasses let off a shine as his camera shutter went *snap*.

With so much shaking from the bed, I swatted my hand back in an attempt to get ‘Grim’ to stop doing whatever it was he was doing. “Hemmy, Julie, Cassey… Go take care of your son… Before sunrise he’s yours.”

“Wake up prefect.” Azul said, having sat on the other side of Thorn.

Idia mouthed the words ‘what did I ever do to you?! Abort! Stop!’

‘Prefect…?’ Looks like Azul let himself into my room, impatient octopus. I sat up and turned and realized I wasn’t in my room. Azul looked like the cat that just got the cream, and I looked down to see a scarlet Idia covering his face with both hands.

“...What are you two doing?” I asked slowly.

“Heh. Looks like we both fell asleep in Idia’s bed. Good morning and goodbye to you both.” And like that Azul walked out.

I would have spoken more with Idia, but he was a babbling red swirling mess. “Sorry for falling asleep on you Idia, I’ll just go now.”

Idia frantically nodded; face still covered as I left.

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“I can’t believe you let me sleep with the two prefects…” Idia rubbed his face tiredly. As it would turn out, passing out is not a form of well rested sleep, who knew?

Ortho tried to reassure his brother. “Think of it to a practice run, after all, the Ramshackle prefect, she-”

“(she?..)

She?

SHE?!

WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE?!”

Idia’s hair shot up frantically as he stared in horror at his brother.

“I misspoke.” Ortho looked off to the side.

“IT'S LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE FOR YOU TO MAKE A MISTAKE! I PROGRAMED YOU!” Idia panicked. “HOLY GREAT SEVEN A GIRL HUNG OUT WITH ME (and was in my room?! dsjfbjsbdfis)”

Idia threw himself under the covers as his only means of protection against such a twisted fate.

Ortho frantically waved his arms around. “Shh! Brother it's a secret!”

“Rip Idia you won’t be missed.” Promptly Idia passed out.

(AN: Inspired by Caseoh and Sturniolo’s commentary.)

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Intermission 2:

☆ Practice Makes The Prefect Question Their Life Choices ☆

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Deuce smacked his head against the library table. “It's hopeless… I’ve never heard of any of these terms and the make-up test is tomorrow...”

“C’mon Loosey-Deucey!” Ace jabbed Deuce’s side with his elbow. “That’s not how goody two shoes star-honor students talk.”

Deuce sighed, lifted his head and smacked his face in a resounding slap to hype himself up “right!” And got back on that grind set.

“That’s why we’re all studying together, for support -” I started.

“I thought it was because we all bombed our last assignment?” Grim blinked.

“No thanks to you, Grim.” Ace frowned, reminded on Grim’s impromptu experiment that got all of us scolded by professor Crewel - and receiving a failing grade.

“No thanks to me?!” Grim threw his pencil at Ace.

Ignoring the spat, I moved my textbook closer to Adeuce. “Speaking of what’s the ‘swans cradle’?”

“Hey hey little guppies!” Floyd came bounding over to our group study session, forcefully scooting Ace out of his chair to sit next to me.

“Hey?!” Ace huffed from the floor, finding a new seat next to Grim.

“Shrimpy, how about we go on a date?” Floyd ‘asked.’

Everyone at the table made different sounds of surprise and protest, except for me as I remained silent taking in this new information.

“Tomorrow, we hit up the Mostro Lounge for a bite, we go to the library, I’ll carry your books while you look cute studying, and then I’mma take you to the basketball court.” Floyd grinned, performing some seated basketball throws. “You can watch me sweat.” He winked.

I started laughing, thrown off by Floyd’s directness. “What? What? Watch you sweat? You think I’ll get a workout too through osmosis?”

“Nah, you’ll be busy. You’re going to clap for me, and cheer - as I beat all those other barnacles.” Floyd states seriously.

Floyd is oddly endearing and cute when he wants to be. Suddenly he leans in closer, I stop laughing but my wide grin never leaves my face.

Ace butts in, creating distance between Floyd and I.

“If Thorn’s going to be cheering for ANYBODY on the basketball team, it’ll be me: the Ace of the court!” He states resolutely.

“Tch. Whatever.” Floyd pushes himself out of the chair and storms off, kicking a stray paper ball.

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Eventually I was the only one remaining at the library table. Deuce left for his track meet, subsequently taking Grim with him. Something about wanting to ‘train to boost his magical abilities faster’ a bit surprising from Grim, but as long as he has a non-destructive hobby…

“Ah there you are prefect. I’m afraid Floyd is throwing a bit of a tantrum we’ll say, and it would be in everyone’s best interest if you attended his basketball practice.”

I jumped slightly in my seat at Jade’s soft-spoken voice. I meet his ‘friendly’ gaze and realize I’m cornered; stuck between an immovable bookcase and the immovable force that is Jade Leech.

I start collecting my things wondering how I’ll get past the slippery eel. The Leech twins, tweels, aren’t *bad* per say, just very rough with the things that pique their interest.

“I’ve got Grim and a few other things to look after, I don’t have the time to spare.” I turn to stand, but Jade is already to my right!

“I was hoping you’d pick the hard way. I’m glad we’ve come to a mutual understanding prefect.” Jade instantly had me thrown over his shoulder.

“Ehh?! Put me down right now!” I struggled in his hold, becoming flustered as my one-sided fight was in vain.

Jade continued his leisurely walk, pushing open the doors, acting as if he could not hear or feel me, or anyone else’s stares for that matter.

“Jade, put me down or you will suffer the consequences!’ I shouted, his iron grip never relenting.

Jade chuckled. “I’m sure your are capable prefect, but since I have you here, let's have a chat.” Jade adjusted his position, hitting his shoulder lightly into my abdomen.

“Augh!”

“I find it unfair how you outwardly favor my brother over me, you indulge in his whims and close proximity.” Jade started.

I let out a sigh and asked, “do I get a choice? Whose fault do you think that is?”

Jade chuckled once more. “Fair enough. How would you feel about joining me on a hike?”

“Unless you carry me the whole duration of the trip, no thanks. Ugh, even just thinking about it makes me feel tired.” I adjust myself over Jade’s shoulder, sitting up with my chin in the palm of my hand.

Jade smirked. “That can be easily arranged, any other qualifications?”

I scoffed; Jade can be just as tolerant of jokes as his brother. “I don’t have any gear or clothes suitable for the mountains, so even if I did want to go, it doesn’t seem wise to be so unprepared.”

“You’re quite correct, one never knows when the mountains may turn.”

It was quite for a moment; it looks like Jade took the long way to the gymnasium - how long have I been up here? He’s not even breaking a sweat. Showoff. As a wise man (Iida) once said ‘his Adonis stat is MAXED.’

Jade cleared his throat. “Hypothetically, if one supplied the gear, and carried you, you would go?”

I felt apprehensive in answering Jade. “Sure...Are you plotting something?”

After a while Jade coyly answered, “...Perhaps.”

‘Ruh roh. Is he going to stuff me in a terrarium and force me to eat hybrid mushrooms? Turn ME into a mushroom? Probably not, BUT, you never know what he’s scheming!’ As I mull over the information, occupied with my wild thoughts, Jade gently sets me down outside of the gymnasium doors.

“I’ll see you tomorrow prefect.” Jade politely smiles, turning away.

“Why?”

Jade refuses to elaborate and simply says, “better hurry inside prefect.”

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“OW!” Ace cried out, rubbing his shoulder.

“You’re out Crabby!” Floyd grinned.

Ace frowned. “Yo, just so we’re clear, we’re playing BASKET ball not DODGE ball! I swear I’ve told you like a hundred times! And lay off the weird nickname while you’re at it. Back me up here Jamil. Jamil?!”

Jamil was already long out of sight, sitting down on the bench, taking a drink from his water bottle. A few other NPC’s I don’t care to know also sought refuge on the bench.

Floyd’s head turns in my direction, “SHRIMPY!”

His expression melted into a carefree smile as he ran towards me. Without warning Floyd lifted me up like a teddy bear and pressed me into his chest as he   s q u e e z e d.

Unprepared I coughed out, “Ack! F-loy-d!”

Floyd stopped squeezing me and carried me over to the bleachers, setting me down. “Watch me total these losers, kay?”

I dumbly nodded from whiplash. Floyd instantly fell back into the rhythm of things once on the court. Seemingly less hostile with his teammates now, maybe that was the vertigo talking. My equilibrium is totaled.

The tense atmosphere was palpable. Floyd began absolutely dominating the court, a serious expression painted his face. A choir of sneaker squeaks and a basketball reverberating the ground. Floyd plowed through his opponents and teammates like a tank. He was in the zone, nothing could break his focus.

The NPC’s in particular voiced their disappointment. “Hah-Hah.. Time-out, Floyd. How’d you get past all three of us?!”

Floyd raised an eyebrow. “Again? Put in a little effort, wouldja? You’ll never learn how to steal the ball at this rate.”

“It's all we can do just to keep up with your dribbling.” A Scarabia student complained.

“Fine. I’ll give you another handicap. I’m normally a lefty, but I’ll only use my right hand this time. Try to get the ball, ‘kay?” Floyd switched the ball to his right and started running at his opponents.

“Ugh! Our only chance is to go for a foul!” An Octavinelle NPC cried out.

“Too bad, soooo sad.” Floyd mocked, shooting for the basket. “Aaaand SWISH! Nothin’ but net!” He boasted.

“GAHH!” The NPC’s wailed in defeat.

“You’re a fan of basketball?”

I jumped slightly; Jamil’s voice startled me. His torso is turned to the side to chat. I really can’t imagine him going out of his way for friendly conversation though.

“Oh yeah, it's entertaining to watch.” Unsure of what Jamil wants, I don't make any small talk.

The corner of Jamil’s lips raises slightly, “you’re too late to join the team, however you could always aid in managerial duties or work as an assistant coach.”

Feeling awkward of having a conversation at a distance, I move down the bleachers to sit next to Jamil. “Definitely worth considering. Any particular reason you want me around?”

Without missing a beat, Jamil answers, “Floyd’s mood swings for one, and I get the impression you’d give valuable insights, with how attentive you watch and that there’s no magic required.”

Just as he had finished saying so, Floyd was doing freaky flips in the middle of the court.

“I’ve always wanted to try doing a head spin! You spin around like a top while balancing on your head! Like this, maybe?” Floyd was on his head, legs flung into the air, he used his hands to spin himself to the left and - “Oof! I fell right on the ol’ tailbone. Aha ha, it’s totally impossible. I can’t keep my balance.”

Jamil sighed, getting up from his place on the bench and chastised Floyd for his improper form.

“Where’d that stuff come from? How’d you learn all that stuff?” Floyd asked Jamil, dragging me onto the court as well. “C’mon Shrimpy! You should know this too!”

Ace crossed his arms as he gave Jamil a look, “you have a passion for dancing?”

Jamil cleared his throat, “You heard nothing. It is simply something I briefly dabbled in with Kalim once upon a time.”

“A headstand is basically as simple as standing upside down on your head?” Floyd turned to me, “I’ll give ya a boost shrimp.”

“GAH?! FLOYD?!” Floyd picked me out and manhandled me upside down, holding my legs as my hands and head rested on the floor.

Floyd let go of my legs as he attempted to do the same move himself, Ace caught my legs and helped me out of the position before I could get injured.

“Oof! I guess I still don’t get it! Howzabout you show me how it’s done, Sea Snake?” Floyd asked Jamil from his position on the floor.

Caught up in Floyd’s antics, Jamil found himself explaining the basics of a headstand while in a headstand. Ace and I backed away.

“Dude, I’m so over this. I’ve totally lost them. I would have never pegged Jamil as a breakdancer. Talk about the surprise of a lifetime.” Ace sat with me back on the bench.

“There’s always something new to learn everyday… If we’re willing.” I half-heartedly answer, too distracted by Jamil and Floyd’s breakdancing. Floyd is a quick learner, just like Ace.

Ace grumbled as he packed up his stuff.

“Wah! You’re totally awesome Sea Snake! I’m totally fired up now to play some B-ball!” Floyd cheered, rising from the ground and locating the nearest basketball.

Ace slammed his bag down, “so now we’re going to play?!” Ace rushed back onto the court.

I found myself immersed in the game - when Ace spun the basketball on his finger before shooting a five pointer, or when Floyd leaped towards the basket for a slam dunk! It was so intense and cool! While players like Floyd have an upper hand with height and strength, and players like Ace gain an advantage with fake outs and misdirection, the way Jamil avoids getting blocked or cornered and out maneuvers his opponents is akin to a choreographed dance, highlighting Jamil’s observant nature, he’s untouchable. Jamil advances for a slam dunk and he–

“DOKKAN! NICE SHOT!” Jamil triumphantly shouted.

When the buzzer blared, those who were not basking in the afterglow of a spirited play took to bullying Jamil over his catchphrase.

“Pfft- dokkan. Dokkan!” Ace mocked between his laughter.

Jamil’s blush rose to his ears. “Quiet you!”

Floyd was into it making exaggerated hand motions and explosion noises. “If you can’t even get fired up, did you even play?”

As the boys came over to the bench, I jumped up and cheered “dokkan game you guys!”

Jamil grumbled “not you too….”

Floyd embraced me in a hug, arms wrapped around my shoulders as my face squished into his neck. I feel a slimy substance on my skin from the contact.

“Shrimpy! Don’t I deserve a reward for playing so well? Let's have that date now.”

Peeling myself off from Floyd I cringed. “Uh, you really weren’t kidding about the sweat, I think a shower before anything else would be preferred.” I make a show of pulling my shirt away from my skin.

Floyd tilted his head. “Eh, but I was just joking about the sweat. Azul has marketed the secretion as moisturizers and balms before, so think of it like that.”

Ace, and I all made a questionable face at that, Jamil’s eyebrow raised, unanimously we decided it was for the best to drop the matter entirely and block it from our memories. And more importantly not to accept beauty or health products from Azul.

Jamil smirked, “the prefect only started cheering after I entered the court.”

Ace groaned, “huffing copium much? Thorn was just trying to be nice.”

Floyd rolled his eyes, “yeah right guppies. Shrimp likes me the best, duh!”

“JAMIL!” A bright voice broke the rising tension.

Kalim was happily running over to our group.

“Hiya guys!” He cheerfully greeted.

“Why are you here?” Jamil asked, somewhat annoyed, crossing his arms.

Kalim airily chuckled as he turned his attention to me. “Jamil’s pretty good at basketball, right? Like he’s the coolest best ever, right?” He winked as he nudged Jamil.

I blinked. “Uh, yeah, Jamil’s good at basketball.”

Jamil’s flush was rapidly returning. “Kalim, why are you here?” Jamil made an attempt to push Kalim out of the gym.

“I’m just here to give my friend support after asking the prefect ou–”

Jamil tackled Kalim before we could blink.

“Oof!”

“There was an attempt on your life! We better go.” Jamil expertly crafted over top of Kalim.

“There was? Thanks Jamil!’ Kalim beamed, limping as he was escorted out of the gym.

Ace scratched his head, watching the pair exit the room. “What was that about? Huh?!”

Thorn and Floyd were long gone, Thorn also escorted out of the gym, but in tweel fashion. Ace was left alone and confused.

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Intermission 5:

☆ She’s The Man ☆

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Sitting under the large, withered tree outside of Mr. S’s shop, a gentle breeze brushes past me. The weather is so tepid and bright that even the decrepit scenery looks serene rather than spooky. It’s a rare occasion I find myself alone.

“Thorn, you need to pick up more masculine hobbies.”

Epel’s lavender head bobs into my line of sight. “Where did that come from?”

“You need to be considerin’ your image. You’re the odd man out when it comes to sports - even Vil participates in athletics - and he’s Vil!” Epel states, closing the book in my lap and stuffing it in my bag.

“Which is why I’m inviting you to try out for magishift.” Epel grabs my hand and pulls me up, leading me to practice.

“C’mon I know if you saw how rugged and cool it is you’ll wanna join quicker than two shakes of a lamb's tail.”

I let myself be pulled by Epel’s firm grip. “Epel, I don’t have any magic - if I tried to play on a team, I think I’d explode or something.”

Epel sputters for a moment. “Well, there’s nothing stopping you from warmup drills - it’ll be good for you. Even just watching will boost your testosterone.” Epel takes the time to flash me his biceps, as proof.

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“You’ve got ten minutes to stretch” Leona calls out, walking off to sit in the shade.

“Oi, Leona.” Ruggie tails after their free-range captain.

Epel and I did some stretches on our own, at first. Eventually we came together for some partner stretches like back stretching, wide legged straddle, back-to-back twist, and hamstrings.

Epel glanced at the time as he took a sip from his water bottle. “We’ve still got some time left before-”

“Heh, wanna fight?” I playfully ask.

The devious smirk I get in return is answer enough.

It was on sight, Epel and I quickly found ourselves rolling in the dirt, smiling all the while. At one point he had me on my back, pinning my hands by my head, but I placed my foot on his hip and gently launched him backwards so that I was now straddling him. I pinned his arms to the side of his head and laughed out “pinned ya.”

Epel stuttered and I released him from my hold, he instantly sat up and crossed his arms. “Pff, I let you do that.”

I looked away for a moment to take in my new surroundings, Epel tackled me. We spun and rolled until I came out on top. I pushed his shoulders down and smugly said “pinned ya again.” Epel’s face was slightly pink as we both panted.

“Gross the first years are trying to repopulate.” Leona’s arms were crossed as he gave us a bored look.

Epel quickly bucked me off and stood up. I landed next to Leona with an ‘oof.’

Ruggie let out his signature laugh at the sight.

Leona clicked his tongue looking down at me. “You’ve got no business being on the spelldrive field herbivore. No muscles or magic; you’re a liability.”

I stood up, brushing the dirt off myself, not taking offensive to the comments. “I may not eat meat, but I photosynthesize.”  I rolled up my sleeves and flexed my muscles to the group. “Grr! That’s how greens eat!”

Ruggie was the first to lose it and start tormenting me. He flexed one of his arms and said, “that’s how greens eat, shishishi.”

Epel laughed loudly, and Leona snorted. I quickly grew embarrassed and told Ruggie to stop. (Spoiler alert: he did not.)

“Shishi, come on Thorn,” Ruggie grabbed my hand, leading me off the field and in the direction of the storage shed. “You can be a real man and help me with some managerial stuff.”

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“Hm? I think my favorite Twisted Wonderland Classic would have to be “The Glass Slipper” Because she represents me! She’s broke!” Ruggie made an exaggerated motion, sticking out his hand, “let me borrow 20 madol.”

Clutching my sides from laughing, I used Ruggie as support to stabilize myself.

“Ahhh, Ruggie we have so much in common, you know what’s for dinner?”

“SLEEP!” We both laughed out, hanging onto one another subsequently causing us to knock over the equipment we just set up.

“Finally someone who gets it.” Ruggie said, dusting himself off.

After catching my breath, I attempted to detangle one of the volleyball nets. Subsequently becoming half entangled myself. It started with the left sneaker, then a zipper, soon it was my right leg… Ruggie wheezed at my struggle.

“It's not funny, Ed.” I crossed my arms as Ruggie came to my aid.

“The heck it's not!” He chuckled as he untied me.

After sorting out the equipment, and swapping some life hacks with Ruggie, I picked up the checklist Ruggie gave me and stood by the bleachers to observe the ongoing practice.

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Leaning against the wooden beam, I still find myself confused on how one scores points in magishift. I only have the player’s groans or cheers to go off of.

A break bell sounds, and Epel is instantly stepping off of his broom and rushing over to me. Practice must be over.

“Did you see that?! I was like ‘wabam’, ‘pssfhof’ and ‘shuun’!” Epel happily animated with his hands.

I can’t help but reciprocate his excitement, making some gestures and jumps of my own. “Yeah! When you had the disc and spun around upside down, I thought you’d drop it, but you never did and paved the way for a goal!”

I brought my hand to Epel’s face, to fix his disheveled hair, but before my hand could even touch his face, he was gone. Epel’s body was slammed into next week!

“LEONA?!” My eyes go wide to where Epel was launched.

“No slacking on the spelldrive team, go clean up.” Is all he says to Epel.

Epel stays grinning and yells out “you got it!” Running back to the field.

It looks like Leona is going to leave too, and Epel seems fine, so I return back to cross referencing my papers before meeting up with Epel.

A resounding slam rings by my ear. Looking up, Leona has kabedon’d me.

“You don’t need an excuse to come watch me play herbivore.” Leona smirks.

I cross my arms and turn to the side. “Ha? As if! I’m here to support Epel and help out Ruggie, obviously.” I try to mask my playfulness with annoyance, but I’m failing miserably, and Leona knows!

Leona slams his other hand where I had turned, causing me to return to my original position, facing him.

“No need to be shy, I can smell how much you like me.”

“And what does that smell like?” I raise a brow laughing.

“Sweet.” Leona licks his lips, grabbing my chin, and deftly turns my head to the side - biting my cheek!

I let out a high-pitched squeak out of surprise, Leona growls through his nibbling.

“If you ate more meat your cheek would be more satisfying to chew on.”

“Then stop?!”

“Nah.” Promptly closing his lips around the space. It doesn’t hurt; it’s definitely a new sensation though.

“I’m not a stress ball!” I lightly whine, unsure what else to do in this situation.

Someone lets out a sigh. “Leona, what are you doing?”

I open my eyes to see Ruggie with his arms crossed, but he doesn’t look off put by the scene in front of him.

“He’s trying to use me as a snack replacement!” I yell.

Leona releases his seal on me, “haa, you wish. Let's go Ruggie.”

Rubbing my cheek, I pass Ruggie the paper he gave me. Walking side by side, Ruggie and Leona are caught up in their own conversation, now's my chance!

I pull Leona’s face to my own and bite him back! Through a mouth full of cheek, I ask him, “how you like that?”

Leona instantly pulls me off him and smirks. “I’ll give you a ten second head start herbivore.”

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“Hey Thorn, I’ve been meaning to ask ya.” Epel starts.

We were walking back to the dorms in comfortable silence. I look at Epel awaiting his question.

“Whys yer cheek all red?” He points.

After a long silence, he asks another question. “And whys yer arms got bite marks and why is yer neck red too?”

I let the questions sit, collecting dust before answering, “let’s just stop talking.”

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“Prefect Leona seems in high spirits. It must have been one heck of a game.” Jack idly comments, watching Leona exit the lounge.

Ruggie side eyes Leona. “Yeah. Right.”

“What are all those… *Interesting* marks from?” Jack coughs while asking, somewhat embarrassed.

Ruggie lets out a long-tired sigh. “Trust me, you don’t want to know.”

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Intermission 6:

☆ Harleys in Hawaii ☆

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“Catch”

I fumbled to catch the black helmet Deuce tossed to me. I couldn’t help but give him a confused look.

“Follow me.”

Was all that he offered. I matched his determined strides as we silently walked behind the main campus onto the forest grounds.

Parked on the long-overrun mossy trail was a blast cycle! A sleek sparking blue design with neon blue light features.

“What’s going on Deuce?” I ask with a small smile.

Helmet already on, he pressed a button on the side to unshade his face. “You looked really done with this week, and riding always makes me feel better so I thought maybe it would make you feel better too. Plus, I did say I’d take you for a ride one day.”

Deuce took the helmet out of my hands and placed it on my head. Slapping the top. I gave him a look as the helmet magically adjusted.

“That’s how my mom used to put it on me.” Was all he said with a grin, pressing the side button on his helmet once more.

The helmet was much more technologically advanced than the exterior would lead one to believe. With a click of a button, Deuce and I could easily speak to one another, similar to a cell phone.

Deuce had already sat on the blast cycle, making a show of revving the engine, with his own magic possibly. “Well, what are you waiting for? Let’s go!”

I approached the mono wheeled device, unsure of how to move forward. “Deuce, I’ve never even ridden a motorcycle, let alone a magical vehicle.”

“Never? So, this is your first time…” Deuce thought for a while, then stepped off his bike, pulling me forward. “I think it would be best if you were in front of me for the best experience.”

As I sat in the front, Deuce pressed his torso against me and put his hands over my own on the handlebars, the purr of the engine returning once more.

A few thoughts swirled in my mind. ‘Whoa, sitting so close like this, feeling the shift of his movements… I never realized Deuce is BUFF AS HELL! You can get muscles like this from track?!’

“Heh. You ready for the ride?” Deuce questioned; I could hear the grin in his voice.

The tire had the dirt skidding, the bike threatening to unleash its full potential as it waved left to right.

Whether or not I was, I forced out a grin and called, “let’s ride!”

The magical wheel shot off, instantly sending me even closer into Deuce, the force of the air and magic having us go this way and that.

We were moving so fast; I had no idea how Deuce could expertly evade the small boulders and trees. My heart sped up at every turn, and hills became launch pads as we soared over each one.

I started cheering and yelling over the excitement.

“All we’re missing now is some music.”

“I got you covered Thorn!”

The song that happened to come on, from Deuce’s playlist, the radio, or internet, I’ll never know: JOYRIDE by Kesha.

“Best night of your life, get in loser for the J O Y R I D E.” Deuce and I yelled as we laughed after each impromptu landing pad.

The song changed to My Chemical Romance’s The World Is Ugly. Deuce quickly changed it.

“Hey! Bring that back! I love songs like that!” I yelled.

Although I couldn’t see Deuce, his sputtering told me I had caught him off guard. “Seriously? You don’t think it's like middle school emo cringe?”

I answer, “no way, and if it is, who cares? Haha! Be free!”

Deuce turned that sucker up! As we exited out of the woods, we flew through an open clearing, opalescent waves caught my attention.

I couldn’t help mumbling to myself. “I’ve never been to a soft starry sand beach before.”

“That changes today.” Was all that Deuce said, driving past the open water and loose sand, opting to turn into Sage Island’s town.

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Deuce parked his magical wheel outside of a convenience store. As our feet hit the cobblestone, Deuce tossed me his helmet once more.

“Making an emergency purchase?” I chuckled, feeling the adrenaline of something new made my body feel light and bouncy.

“You bet. Stay out here I’ll be right back.” Deuce was already rushing inside before I could even reply.

He wasn’t kidding. I didn’t even have time to start ruminating on my thoughts, he held one small bag in hand. Fishing around, he handed me an eyeliner pencil.

I raise a brow. “Are you saying I look too ugly to be seen with?”

“WHAT?! No!” Deuce panicked, waving his hands in defense.

“I’m only teasing you Mr. Honor Student.” I laugh lightly.

Deuce frowned slightly but quickly returned to his positive expression. “Makeup is a great way to either express yourself or hide yourself - whichever makes you feel more comfortable.”

“True. But I don’t even have a mirror…The visor might be difficult to accurately use.”

“I have an idea, if you’ll let me.”

I hand Deuce the eyeliner, and he starts drawing a design on one of the corner of my eye, right outside the shop.

I stare at my reflection from the shop window; Deuce and I now have matching spades.

“Thanks Deuce, now we’re twinsies for real. What else is in the bag?” I make a show of attempting to peek inside, but Deuce puts it behind his back.

Deuce mocks me with my own words. “Wouldn’t you like to know? It's a surprise tool that will help us later.”

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LA Devotee by P!ATD is playing as the salty crashes sound out and blinding sand comes into view.

As we find a spot on the beach to bask in the soft yellow glow, Deuce reveals his secret purchase, ice cream.

Of course, during this time, I make sure to take a bunch of photos for magicam, and for myself of course. Eventually Deuce and I come together, pressing our faces together to make the spades look like an upside-down heart.

Gently kicking the sand Deuce suggests, “wanna play in the water?”

I start removing my school blazer and rolling up my sleeves. “You’re on!”

The race to the coastline doesn’t stop once we hit the water, it evolves into a game of tag. Kicking and splashing the ocean water, getting completely soaked as we laugh and tease one another.

Deuce accidentally slips, sitting in the shallow waves as he becomes a fountain. Between my laughs I walk over to help him when a melody catches my attention.

My head turns trying to find the source, spotting a few rocks, I start walking towards them in an attempt to figure out who could be singing so close to us. Before I can reach them, Deuce wraps his arms around my torso, lifting me up and throwing me into the water. A blur of glowing red passes my vision before I hit the water.

I raise for air, pushing my slicked hair out of my face, mystery long forgotten. Deuce extends a hand to help me up, to play some more.

Returning to the beach, the sunset is ethereal, surreal like a painting. Strokes of violet, light blue clouds, pinks and orange lowering into the ocean.

Deuce starts freaking out over the sight. “I FORGOT ABOUT CURFEW! WE GOTTA GO!”

“But Deuce we’re still wet!” I say grabbing our disregarded items.

“We’ll dry off during the ride!” He answers.

We quickly scamper back to the magical motorbike, I sit behind Deuce this time, sitting so close to him that I can rest my head to the side of him.

It's a race against the darkening sky back to campus. Halestorm’s cover of Bad Romance is playing as we whip through the forest, one solitary headlight activated. The wind is harsh against our exposed salty skin.

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Our hair is frazzled, makeup smudged, clothes in a sorry state, partially on and half dry. We’re panting as Heartslabyul comes into focus. Riddle is standing outside the gates, tapping his foot impatiently, a stern look covering his features. But he’s not the only one, his vice housewarden, and Cater are also present. Trey reveals nothing with his neutral demeanor, however, Cater has a mischievous smile about him.

“Do you realize what time it is?” Riddle demands.

“What happened?” Trey asked in concern.

“I think you mean *who* happened Trey.” Cater wiggles his eyebrows in our direction.

It was at this moment I realized I did not have to run back to Heartslabyul with Deuce and could have been spared this awkward and slightly embarrassing confrontation if I had just gone back to my own dorm.

Deuce tried to rationalize an excuse, but his prefect was having none of it. Thankfully he was spared from a collar.

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[@ alienprotag posted 6 photos with @ magicalwheels4lifer captioned: Rockstars on the beach.]

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Intermission 3:

☆ A Walk in The Woods ☆

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“Good morning prefect.”

My eyes flew open. Slowly turning my head to the right, there was Jade Leech, eye level with me in my darkened room. I break out into goosebumps, slowly I turn my head to the left to estimate the time. The sun has yet to rise, the sky is a deep shade of navy, grey clouds paint the sky. I notice Grim sleeping snuggly in fabric, like a cute burrito.

“Jade what…?” I sit up and rub the sleep out of my eyes. “Why are you here so early?” As I wait for a response I hold my head in my hand, almost drifting back to sleep.

Jade pushes a bundle of clothing into my chest. “I took the liberty of securing breakfast. Get changed.”

My expression must be concerning as he elaborates. “Are you perhaps in need of a refresher? I specifically stated we would go on a hike tomorrow.”

“Yeah… Okay…No?” I crossed my arms. “All you said was ‘see you tomorrow.’”

“An oversight on my part, I assure you.”

I rolled my eyes. “Well as slippery as your mind may be… But what about Floyd?”

It had just occurred to me that the tweels had both asked me to do stuff with them the next day. Was Floyd also just going to enter my dorm and whisk me away?

Jade's smile never leaves his face, but I swear I saw his eyebrow twitch for a millisecond. Jade pulls me out of bed and ushers me into the bathroom.

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I stumbled out of the bathroom with a frown. “Jade, I’m practically drowning in these clothes. How am I supposed to hike?”

While the white beanie and leather gloves fit, the beige jacket and blue boots however are too loose, it would be difficult to make them functional.

“Forgive me, I’ve seemed to have miscalculated our size difference.” Jade says in faux sympathy.

Now that I’m more awake, and properly seeing Jade, I realize we match in a way. That makes sense given these are his clothes. Jade is wearing a beige beanie, a white jacket under his blue overcoat, leather gloves, brown and red laced boots, and an orange backpack secured with a buckle over his chest.

Even though I know he’s doing this to goad me, I feel bad for complaining realizing these are his clothes. “Never mind, I appreciate the sentiment. I’m happy to wear them, and we match!” I say with a smile.

Jade looks thoughtful. “I have a remedy for that.”

Jade steps closer. Oh duh, he can probably magic them to adjust to my size.

He scoops me up into a princess carry. Instinctively I wrap my arms around his neck for support. “Hey?! Why are you picking me up?!”

“Just fulfilling one of your hiking requirements prefect, and as an added bonus you no longer need to worry about being affected by ill-fitting gear.” He smiles. “Lucky you.”

As he carried me through the living area, I noticed a pile of ghosts! “Did you beat up my housemates and stuff Grim in a sock?!”

“Now why would I do a thing like that?”

He’s dodging the question!

I shift my focus back to Jade. “I hope you left a note or something. People are going to misunderstand and think they stumbled into a crime scene.”

Jade chuckled. “I’ve left a note detailing everything of importance.”

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The forest behind the school should be classified as a secondary mirror portal the way it somehow connects to everything. After some time, Jade begins his ascent up the mountain’s trail. The ground and ledges worn away from years of use. Small lightning bugs flutter by, their light dimming for rest. As we reach the first level of the mountain, frosted grass and unusual fauna are abundant. The area overlooks the campus. My stomach grumbles.

“Let’s stop for a moment for breakfast.” Jade suggests.

I give Jade an unamused look. “May I be permitted to SIT DOWN to eat?”

“Of course.” Jade proceeded to sit on the horizontal log, moving me around so that I was sat on the left of his lap.

“JADE!”

Jade ignored my complaints and handed me a warm canister. Feeling hunger more than annoyance, I unscrew the lid to reveal the delicious aroma of rice noodle soup. Complete with an assortment of vegetables.

‘Of course there’s shiitake mushrooms in there. How do mushrooms work their way into everything with this guy?’

As I dig up new vegetables with each bite, my sights entirely set on a trail of fat glowing green mushrooms, I realize Jade is just as captivated by the scenery as I am. This feels awkward for me, like I’m spoiled or somehow taking advantage of Jade.

“Open up.” I hold my spoon up to Jade’s face. He looks taken off guard for a moment but quickly recovers.

“Oya? What's this? Concerned for my well-being, or do you think I did something strange to the soup?” He gives me an unreadable look.

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” I say playfully, pushing the spoon past his lips.

On my next bite, he asks, “I notice you tend to lean towards lighter, and umami notes - is the dish to your preference?”

I finished chewing a piece of cilantro to answer him. Although his expression and tone remain unchanged, I think more than praise he wants reassurance. “You did an excellent job Jade. Your observations were correct, I love these types of foods.”

After a moment of staring at my smile, he continues. “...You don’t think it's odd, to have stored away that information?”

“I think it would be odder if you didn’t notice, given your position in Mostro Lounge.” I chuckle. “Bird watching goes both ways.” I wink.

We return to comfortable silence as I continue to feed Jade and myself. The birds begin to chirp awake, the ombre sky dyes into a golden orange sunrise. I rest my head against Jade’s shoulder, basking in the warmth of the sun.

Once the sky fades to a light yellow and blue tone, I seal the canister and reach around Jade to tuck it back into his pack. He comments, “you’re… Interesting.”

“And I think you must be overconfident or exceptionally strong to think you can carry me the entire hike.”

Jade stood up, shifting me back to our original position and counters, “perhaps you’re simply weak?”

“Hey.” I lightly protest.

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Jade recites his extensive knowledge of kingdom fungi lore after we had a heated debate. Upon seeing a rounded white mushroom with three perfect red circles I insisted it was a toad while Jade insisted it was in fact a mushroom. I didn’t care to explain my joke, and if we can’t make ourselves laugh then what can we do?

“Fungi are genetically closer to humans than plants…

Some researchers have utilized mycelium and agricultural byproducts to grow compostable packaging materials…

These bioluminescent mushrooms glow so brightly, locals nicknamed them ‘electric mushrooms’ and use them as natural torches…”

I start fidgeting and become restless in Jade’s hold. “Jade this was *charming* for the first two hours, but my legs feel like jelly, arms are heavy - mom’s spaghetti. LET ME WALK!”

Jade sighs, walks a certain distance, and concedes. As he loosens his hold on me, I look down and realize THERE’S NO GROUND BENEATH ME?! I quickly use all of my upper strength to stay connected to Jade, rather than the open arms of the cliffside.

“What's the problem prefect? You can let go at any time or do you just enjoy being close to me?” He inquires, arms to his side.

“I’ll die?!”

“No, I wouldn’t put you in harm’s way. Perhaps a bone or two may break but nothing dire. I’ve selected a non-too steep hill.”

“There’s crows flying beneath us?!”

Jade looks past me. “So, there is.”

“AH FINE! You can keep holding me!” I say in desperation.

Jade brings his arms back to secure me. “Be careful what you say or ask for dear prefect. Or you just might get it.”

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“Hmm? What’s this?” Ace asked, Deuce also leaned in to read the post it on Ramshackle’s front door.

{I have the prefect. - Leech}

Adeuce jumped back in shock. “EHHHHH?!”

“Which one?!” Deuce asked, crumbling the paper.

“Does it matter?!” Ace countered.

“Do they owe them a debt?!” Deuce turned to Ace. The duo frantically ran off to track down their unlucky friend.

Just upstairs, Grim heard the commotion and rolled around pitifully on the bed. “Fwnya! What gives?! THORN! GHOSTS! I’m stuck!”

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“You know Jade, our outfit colors compliment one another’s, like matching couples outfits but not matching 1:1?”

Judging by the position of the sun in the sky, it must have been lunch time. As we made our descent down the mountain, Jade’s extra storage filled with rare and common toadstools, I made conversation with any thought that popped into my head.

“How interesting. Merfolk have a similar trend amongst couples. Sometimes the couple wears matching jewelry sets, whether it be the same shell or gem stone the pair has bought or found on different pieces or the same piece but split, for instance a necklace becoming two bracelets.”

I hum in response. “That sounds nice. I’m sure there's couples on land that would be into that too.”

Suddenly a thought pops into my head, and I try to mask my fit of giggles.

“Penny for your thoughts?”

I face Jade, “we should take a photo together, post it, and let people’s imaginations run wild with misconceptions, hehe.”

Jade grinned mischievously. “I like the way you think prefect.’

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[@ alienprotag uploaded new photos with @ shiiok.ing. Captioned: Just two inseparable mushrooms on an enchanted mountain]

[@ ace.ofthe.court commented: pov someone just discovered photoshop - chill out w edits shorty 🙄]

[@ shiiok.ing replied to @ ace.ofthe.court: Photoshop was not used to synchronize our heights.]

[@ caterd.updates commented: 🥺😭 @ alienprotag has been compromised - mission failed]

[@ magicalwheels4lifer replied to @ caterd.updates: What do you mean senpai?]

[@ xchasseur.d.amourx replied to @ magicalwheels4lifer: Monsieur Mastermind and the Trickster are wearing matching outfits - signifying their courtship! C'est magnifique!]

[@ whimsqueeze commented: 😠😠😠 @ shiiok.ing ! IT WAS YOU WHO SNATCHED SHRIMPY AND MADE THEM MISS OUR DATE!]

[@ alienprotag replied to @ ace.ofthe.court: He carried me duh 🤧🤧]

[@ ace.ofthe.court replied to @ alienprotag: Say sike rn.]

[@ shiiok.ing replied to @ ace.ofthe.court: I can assure you, I did in fact carry them the full duration of our hike.]

[@ muscles.n.apples replied to @ ace.ofthe.court: sbhfisdfinkf you just got dokkan’d.]

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Intermission 4:

☆The First Rule Of Book Club: You Do Not Talk About Book Club ☆

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Grim entered Ramshackle’s lounge and ‘slammed’ an envelope sealed in dark green wax bearing Diasomnia’s crest onto the coffee table. “This has got to be from that loud mouthed guy - should I just burn it?”

I chuckle at Grim’s sentiment - it's no secret that Sebek and I often butt heads, we often rub each other the wrong way, and on occasion argue, but I don’t think we’re enemies by any means.

Like that time in the library, where I got so fed up with him adding ‘for a human’ and the end of all his ‘compliments’ that I bit him and told him if he didn’t obey all my commands, by the next full moon he would become a magicless human. And for some reason he believed me and it snowballed into a crazy rumor, and became a huge mess where Diasomnia got involved… It was nuts.

Or that time at the stables where he tried to get back at me for telling him to fall off his horse, so he said, ‘perhaps it is YOU that should ‘eat manure and die’ and I responded, ‘eat shit and live Sebek.’

And most recently was gym class, we had to rotate between a few sports like volleyball, badminton, and basketball, and somehow, he always ‘accidentally’ managed to hit the back of my head with projectiles. I filled his gym bag with ice cubes and put my ice pack down the front of his pants.

I squint my eyes at the memories. ‘Maybe we are…?’

“Let’s read it first to check who it's actually from.” I opened the pristine white envelope to reveal aged cardstock, written in non-too refined scrawl but the alternating green and silver sparkled ink was a nice touch. I think someone possessed Sebek though, all the little hearts floating around are just plain goofy and so unlike him.

{DEAR♡ST HUM♡N,}

{IT IS ♡NDER THE GUIDANC♡ OF MY M♡NTOR ♡ILIA THAT I CORDIALLY} {♡NVITE Y♡U TO THE DIASOMNIA LOUN♡E TO PA♡TAKE IN O♡R ♡OOK} {CLUB.}

{AWAITING YO♡R CO♡RESPONDENCE,}

{- ZIG♡OLT.}

Grim and I turn to one another. “This has got to be some sort of prank! No sane person writes like *that.*” Grim points his paw at the discarded letter.

I shrug. “I guess I’ll find out after classes are over today.”

“Count me out of it!” Grim shouts.

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‘Since I can’t find my missing sock at the dorm, I probably dropped it here. It shouldn’t be too hard to spot.’ Searching by the riverbed, embedded behind the school, many of the trees are barren and the ground is blanketed in warm shades of browns and amber from the fallen leaves.

As I examined the area, a few bunnies hop diagonally from me, I can’t help but to follow them with my head and spot a silver headed person resting against a stump. ‘Is that…?’

Squirrels, bunnies, and songbirds gravitate around Silver - some even nestled on and around him like a shield against the cold. I crouch down next to Silver and place a hand against his forehead to see if he’s alright. Slowly he stirs awake and looks up at me.

Instantly I’m mesmerized by his eye color. I’ve always thought Silver’s eyes were similar to a mellow violet, but up close, it's almost as if there’s waves of pink and blue. “Whoa your eyes… They really are like an aurora.”

Silver remains silent for a while, until he gives a soft smile. “Your eyes are like starlight, comforting grey with flecks of gold.”

Shyly smiling, I extend my hand to Silver to help him up. “I was just checking to see if you were alright, there’s frost in the air, it’ll snow soon. If you sleep out here, you may end up buried or sick.”

“That’s very responsible of you…You’re Thorn Silvanus right?”

I nod. “And you must be Silver.”

Silver yawns. “I’ve heard a lot about you from Sebek, whether I want to or not. I hope you don’t dislike Sebek or feel turned away from Diasomnia.”

I let out a hum as I walked with Silver. “I don’t dislike Sebek, I think him thinking my mere existence a scandal by calling me human is funnier more than anything. It's fun to tease someone so serious.”

Silver chuckles. “Oh yes, fa-Lilia and I often tease Sebek too.”

I rub my arms together to warm up. “I’m not sure what Sebek’s issue is with humans though. The way he separates himself from them… Constantly elevating anything related to fae and putting down human stuff it's like he’s projecting? I know he probably looks down on me as much as any other human, but I don’t feel envious of those with magic or jealous of fae… It’s like he has internalized racism?”

Silver’s eyes widen to the point he looks actually awake. “You got all of that from his thundering speeches?’

I lightly laugh. “I do read a lot, but that’s just speculation on my part, I could be entirely wrong.”

Silver places his robe overtop of me. It's my turn to look caught off guard. “You looked cold. My animal friends have kept me warm, wear it until we reach Diasomnia. I’ve heard Sebek was expecting you.”

“Did you have a choice not to?” Silver and I laugh as we walk to the mirror chamber.

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The creek of the large oak doors alerted the occupants in the lounge. Sebek’s face twisted as he spotted Silver and I. “You know one another?! And you’re both so familiar already?!”

I glance at Silver and smirk, “we’ve met before.”

“Once upon a dream.” Silver finishes.

“Fufufufu! This is a classic exchange from one of my favorite soaps! Whereas the prince charms his way to the heart of the female lead by being himself.” Lilia giggles.

Sebek squawks and says, “THERE’S NO WAY SILVER WOULD HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH THAT HUMAN!”

I ignore the comment in favor of riling him up.

I remove Silver’s coat and neatly fold it, handing it back to him. “Thanks Aurora.”

“Thanks, Starlight.” Silver gives a polite bow and walks off.

Lilia clutches his imaginary pearls. “Egad! The drama continues to unravel! What will unfold next?”

I shoot Lilia a grin while I hold out a book for Sebek. “After reading your favorite, I’d like to introduce you to mine: ‘Pride & Prejudice.’”

Sebek scoffs and loudly criticizes the novel. “Of course you’d pick one of the lowest forms of literature, a romance, second worst to comedy!”

I bring the book back to my bag. “Take this in any way you like, SHUT UP Mr. Darcy!”

Many people in the lounge have paused in their activities to bear witness the infamous ‘Sebek and Thorn argument.’ Murmurs and whispers begin to clutter the space.

Sebek was about to counter, finger raised, when Lilia reigned him in. “Might I suggest taking your qualms to your dorm room Sebek?”

Sebek blushes in embarrassment. “Fine! The lounge is unsuitable for a quiet activity anyways.”

Sebek grabs my wrist and leads me to a winding staircase.

“Unhand me you croc!” I attempt to remove my wrist, twisting and pulling, but that only leads to Sebek interlocking our fingers together.

“Be silent!” He spoke loudly.

“BUY my silence!” I glare back.

“Mind your steps, these stairs are steep!” Sebek yells back, taking the lead on the narrow staircase.

“Thanks for the head’s up!” Shortly after, our quarrel resumes.

Our bickering fades the further we go, Lilia gasps, a scheme of his own brewing. “Spicy!”

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‘Hmm. Sebek’s room is so ordinary and quite frankly boring. The dark academia aesthetic matches the rest of the castle… Dark velvet greens, books and weights, yeah bro works out at the library and studies the blade headass.’ Scanning the room, I spot a large portrait of Malleus hanging on the wall. Internally I sigh. ‘I’m not even going to ask. We know the answer.’

Without much fanfare we start reading. Sebek sits on the edge of his bed while I sit at his study desk. After a while, I decided to ask Sebek some questions while he read.

“Sebek, are you close to the second or third ball?”

Sebek let out a hum, “the second one I believe.”

Laughing to myself I tease him. “Go faster Sebek!”

Sebek frowns and goes to stand from his bed, not setting the book down. Unfortunately, Sebek is a bit of an airhead, and he trips over his weights, bumping into the furniture in the process and lets out a series of painful groans.

He quickly places himself back on the bed as if nothing had happened, his barley masked pained expression does nothing to ease my discomfort. I couldn’t help but exclaim, “OH MY GOD SEBEK! Are you okay?”

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“Hey Grim, where’s Thorn?” Ace looked around the track field.

Grim sat up. “What happened to ‘hello Grim’ or ‘how are you’? We’re not together all the time ya know!”

“Sheesh! I was only asking a question lint ball!” Ace countered.

Deuce returned with Jack, where Grim and Ace were to rehydrate. Grim was attempting to break some Maginness World Records and had taken rest atop of their gym bags.

Everyone silently looked at Grim expectantly. “Thorn’s with that green haired fae at Diasomnia for their book club.”

Deuce tilted his head. “Really? They still have a club together? I didn’t think Thorn and Sebek got along that well.”

Ace had a lightbulb moment. “I’ve heard of stuff like this from my older brother. Enemies sometimes get so heated they get personal and take things back to their room! They’re going to smash!”

Jack scowled. “I don’t think we should be jumping to conclusions.”

“I knew that letter was suspect!” Grim crossed his arms.

“They’re going to smash? We gotta give Thorn back up!” Deuce’s delinquent side threatened to pop out.

Jack huffed. “I think we should mind our business and wait for Thorn or Sebek to tell us what’s going on.”

“Let’s go rescue my hench-human!” Grim declared.

Jack watched as the trio rushed off, no doubt to cause more damage than if they left well enough alone. “...Idiots.”

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“Lilia-senpai! Have you seen Thorn and Sebek?” Ace asked.

“Yeah, it's kind of a big deal. We gotta stop them from smashing!” Deuce added.

Lilia, ever the prankster, went along with their little game. “Fufufu, as the saying goes ‘fighting cats are sure to have kittens.’ They’re in Sebek’s dorm room. Though I doubt there will be much brawling going on.”

“Sebek that dog!”

“Cat you mean, no offence Grim.”

“None taken. BECAUSE I’M NOT A CAT!”

Lilia guided the misinformed trio to the outside of Sebek’s dorm room and instructed them to wait. Curiouser and Curiouser, they pressed their ears against the door to see if they could hear anything of concern.

“Sebek are you close?” Thorn questioned sweetly.

‘Not so strange…’ The trio thought.

“Go faster Sebek!” Thorn urged.

‘A little weird but nothing out of the ordinary…?’ The trio thought.

Not long after, the shifting of furniture and groans rang out.

“OH MY GOD SEBEK!” Thorn cried out.

‘!!! UHH!’ The trio thought in concern!

The door suddenly flies open! “Aha! Busted! You two are smashing!” Ace accuses. Deuce and Grim have fallen to the floor while Lilia cackles as he floats around.

Sebek and I looked at one another confused for a moment. “We are? Sebek you should have told me; I would have put my book down.”

Sebek makes a bewildered face, absolutely lost, with no signs of connecting shit.

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Terror Is Trending

Halloweek

Part 1

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During one of the last classes of September, a homeroom period had been scheduled. As Grim and I, and the two honorary members of Ramshackle shuffled in with the rest of our peers, professor Crewel leaned against his desk as he watched us pile into our seats. With magic, his fountain pen and attendance sheet floated in the air, checking itself off.

“One dog, two dogs, three dogs... Yes, the whole kennel is here. It's time for homeroom to begin. I have an important announcement for you today. As I'm sure you're all aware, Halloween is one month from now.”

An eruption of excitement made itself known from some of the other students present.

“FINALLY. I've waited so long for this!”

“I've always dreamed of spending Halloween at Night Raven College!”

Grim straightened up in his seat. “Wow, everybody's gettin' excited just hearing the word. The ghosts weren't kiddin' when they said Halloween was special.

“Yeah, the news was like a spark of electricity - everyone’s come back to life.” I note.

Ace leaned back in his chair and grinned. “Halloween's all about the spectacle.”

Deuce turned to me. “Speaking of spectacles—have you bought a pumpkin for your room yet, Thorn? People are already lining up at the Mystery Shop. You'd better get in quick before all the good pumpkins sell out.”

Ace leaned forward in his chair. “A jack-o'-lantern's the perfect thing for that ghostly holiday vibe.”

“You guys are pretty jazzed up about this.” Grim stated, not quite aware about what the big deal was.

I gasp, “think about all the limited-edition flavored things! The cinnamon and caramel treats! The way sweet potatoes, and pumpkins work their way into all the food groups!”

Ace snickered. “Well, sure. Who DOESN'T get jazzed up for Halloween? I bet even the Ignihyde students will turn out for this, and they're, like, textbook shut-ins. Not to mention Loosey-Deucey over here, right?” Ace gestured to Deuce.

“I-I mean, it's nice having a day with slightly relaxed rules. And getting to dress up in cool costumes is fun… I doubt there's a single kid or grown-up in all of Twisted Wonderland who hates Halloween.” Deuce said, a bit embarrassed.

Professor Crewel let out a long exhale and rubbed his head. “I am reminded that this is the time of year when you pups' giddy yapping becomes downright unbearable.”

The twang of his whip against the board rang out. “Stay! Be quiet! I know this is your first Halloween since enrolling, and I don't care. What I DO care about is you behaving like I've trained you. As I expect you all know, this holiday is a major event at Night Raven College.”

Professor Crewel then pointed to the board as an explanation magically appeared for the event. “The week leading up to it is called Halloween Week. For its duration, students are expected to host a stamp tour for visitors from off-campus. Each dorm will select one campus location to decorate and use as their stamp tour checkpoint. The key is that off-campus visitors must have free and complete access to this event. In short, for the duration of Halloween Week, there will be visitors walking the school grounds. Do you know why it is that we go out of our way to run these labor-intensive festivities?”

“Ooh, ooh, I know! So you can rake in the big bucks with entry fees!” Grim excitedly fist pumped.

I looked down in Grim’s direction. “You’ve got a criminal mind.”

“ABSOLUTELY NOT.” Professor Crewel boomed. “The very idea of taking money from participants is absurd! They tour the campus free of charge. How do you whelps think Night Raven College has lasted for as long as it has? Simple: by virtue of the understanding, cooperation, and subsistence of Sage's Island locals. Halloween Week is a prime opportunity to showcase your training to our visitors. I expect you all to look your best at all times. No slacking!”

“A stamp tour, huh?” Grim scratched his chin in thought.

I also have a thought. ‘I know they tried to make the school westernized in the game, but sometimes the Japanese influence jumps out: stamps.’

“You act like you didn't hear about this from your Halloween management committee member already.” Ace chuckled.

“Because we haven't dummy.” I informed him.

“Huh? The what committee?” Grim asked.

Crewel looked in our direction. “Each dorm puts a student in charge of Halloween affairs to keep things running smoothly. You must have heard about this from the headmage.”

“Nope. Never.” Grim stated, without a hint of mischief.

Professor Crewel balked. “What?! … Silvanus, Do you mean to tell me this is also your first exposure to this information?”

“Yes professor.”

“I see…” Professor Crewel sighed once more. “Perhaps the headmage forgot to reach out to Ramshackle Dorm.”

“Dude. Talk about sloppy management.” Ace commented.

Deuce chimed in. “Don't worry, though! If you two get confused about anything… Feel free to ask me. After all, I'm one of this year's Halloween management committee members for Heartslabyul!”

Ace butted in. “Whatever, man. Your name just happened to come up when we drew lots for it.”

I give Ace a look. “Spare us the story Ace - like you’d willingly participate in extra work.”

Deuce joined in, “can it, Ace. Luck of the draw or not, Housewarden Rosehearts told me he expected the best from me. I'm going to make sure Night Raven College's Halloween traditions are proudly represented!”

“Your enthusiasm is noted but do ensure that committee affairs do not impact your schoolwork.” Professor Crewel gave Deuce a stern look.

Deuce stuttered. “Y-yes, Professor! Absolutely.”

Professor Crewel returned to his desk to address the class. “Anyway, my point is, you pups had better not get TOO carried away by the Halloween spirit. Any disobedient bad boys in MY class won't be allowed to attend the party on the 31st.”

Grim stood up in his chair. “Wait, there's a PARTY?!”

Professor Crewel nodded. “Indeed, there is—here at Night Raven College, on Halloween night. It's held primarily for our off-campus guests, but students and ghosts can also take part. It's quite the sizable soirée.”

Grim continued, excited once more. “So, does that mean… They'll have food? Fancy food? Fancy-SCHMANCY food?!”

Deuce added, “I hear they get catering from big-name chefs as a treat for the cafeteria ghosts.”

Ace perked up. “Yeah. I hear they put out so much grub, nobody can finish it all. My brother sent me some pics of the event back when he went, and those dishes looked TOPS. It's supposed to be as ritzy and exciting as prom.”

That got me thinking. ‘A momentous occasion just like prom? Ah to have a normal experience with anything… It’s not like I’ll be around for prom. I'd better make sure to look hot - that’s the best part of Halloween, looking good in a unique way with zero judgment.’

I voiced my concerns with the group “would it be weird to dress up as a fae for Halloween? Is that racist?”

Deuce and Ace give me a look that reads ‘what are you talking about?’

Grim cheered. “Myah... Now you've got my attention! I can't wait for Halloween!”

Professor Crewel got us back on track before the dismissal bell. “I'm sure you'll all stay busy working on costumes and decorations for the next month… But I expect you to make this the best Halloween it can be. Is that clear?”

All of the students unanimously said, “yes sir!”

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Chapter Text

The Second-Rate Usurper, Unyielding

Be Prepared

Part 1

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