Chapter Text
12.15.2035: Sunday, Nighttime.
Jess watched with worry as Ted devoured his second burger of the meal.
He licked his fingers, "Fuck. That hit the spot."
"Yes. Um. Ted?"
"Hmm?"
"You're on a break from the gaining, right?"
"Yup."
"Uhh... It's just. We had those leftover pizzas for breakfast. And then you said you were too full for a lunch but then you ordered those bean burritos for a late lunch. And now this is... the dinner you said you wouldn't have, and..."
"Yeah, but like. This is just normal eating. What, I'm not supposed to eat?"
"No, of course you should eat but. Ted, do you think your idea of normal eating might be... distorted"
"Jess, I won't go on a diet that'll make me starve. Besides, this is only day one, and it's the weekend! Tomorrow, I'll start cooking homemade food for you and me! And I'll even help with the cleaning and stuff."
"Okay. Thanks," she bit her lower lip.
10.25.2025: Saturday, Daytime.
Nia opened the door and was greeted by Adam's unamused face.
"Hey, Adam?"
"Fuck, you look worse than I thought," rolled his eyes, "Get out of my way."
He pushed her away, brought in a few large bags with him.
"Let's finish this before Gus gets mad at me for leaving her alone for too long."
"No, please, don't go in there," Nia yelled after Adam as he entered the living room.
A few steps in he felt his feet sticking on the floor.
"The fuck did you spill on the floor?"
"It's... wine. Sorry... Never got the chance to clean it."
"Okay, this first and then you," he pointed at her, "How long have you had that makeup on?"
Adam walked into the broom closet, found the bucket and the mop, and the vacuum cleaner.
As Nia lay on the couch and watched, he opened all the blinds and the windows. Picked up all the trash, vacuumed and cleaned the floors. Picked up all the clothes scattered around, did the laundry. Then threw himself on the couch, almost sitting on Nia's poor legs.
"Sorry," he held his chest as he took quick deep breaths, "I'm done. I'm done."
Nia laughed, "Now we both need a shower."
"So... here's how we do this: I take a shower. Then we wash your hair. Then you take a shower."
"I... Adam, that's not necessary."
"Look, you don't have to let me wash your hair. That's your choice. But I'm just saying, somebody has to wash your hair."
Seeing the tears welling up in her eyes, Adam gently held her hands in his.
"Everything's gonna be okay, Nia. I promise."
She wrapped her arms around him, and they held each other in a warm, friendly embrace.
12.19.2035: Wednesday, Daytime.
Ted sat on the floor, leaning on the closed kitchen door; holding his poor, groaning belly.
"Jess, please. Did you HAVE to lock the fridge?"
"This is for your own good, Ted," Jess replied from the other side.
"May I at least have my phone back?"
"NO! You keep ordering food, it's out of control!"
"It's not like I'm using your money for it," Ted sulked.
"Oh please, you know this isn't about money! Now clean those counters, I'll let you have your phone back as a reward once you're done with the kitchen."
"Promise?"
"Only if you promise not to make any food-related calls!"
12.21.2035: Friday, Daytime.
Adam entered the office, and threw himself on his chair.
"Adam? Are you okay? Don't tell me you're hung-over..."
"I'm not fucking hung-over, I'm fine."
"Never mind, you're drunk... Adam! This is a terrible look for someone at your position!"
He held his head and winced, "Damn, you talk too much."
"Go back home!"
"I'm not going anywhere, I'm fine."
She stood up from her chair.
"I am NOT going to deal with this today. Go home. Right. Now," she said, pointing at the door, "You're starting Christmas break one day early."
"Fine."
"Do not drive home by yourself, call Ted to pick you up."
"I can use the autopilot."
"It's not enough on its own! Adam! If you don't call him, I will. Or is he gonna be drunk too?"
"He's not drunk, he's dead! To me..."
"Oh boy, is this it?" she rolled her eyes, "Did you two fight?"
"No. It's... Yes..." he wiped his tears on his sleeve, "He's not home."
She huffed.
"You're lucky Cheryl's on break right now. I'll ask if she can pick you up."
Adam rested his head on his desk.
"I can stay here. It's been like, two, three hours since my last drink. It'll go away in a sec..."
"No, it will not. Adam!" she checked her phone, "She says she can come. Cheryl will drop you at home, I will visit you after work. DO NOT keep drinking."
He was quiet for a while.
"Sorry... Nia."
She huffed, "It's fine."
Pulling his jacket's collar all the way up to his eyes, Adam left the office with Cheryl.
12.21.2035: Friday, Nighttime.
"Adam! I let myself in! Hope you don't mind!"
"It's good. It's good..."
Nia gasped when she noticed all the trash and piles of fast-food boxes scattered around the hallway. She walked over them and entered the living room, which wasn't in a better condition. Inside she found Adam moaning in pain, holding and rubbing his belly while still continuing to eat.
"Adam! What's wrong with you?"
"I'm sorry."
"Stop saying sorry and explain, please."
Adam sat up to make room for Nia. But the 'sitting up' motion caused him to let out a short burp. Luckily Nia didn't react.
"Come. Come here, please," he shoved some wrappers off the couch, "Sit with me. I got us food. You have a burger and some tenders— It is vegan, I don't forget that, look at the logo on the bag... They are at the bottom of the bag... Unless I ate them by accident."
"If you ate them, I'll be pissed."
"Don't get mad, don't get mad. They're there."
Thankfully she found her food uneaten.
"The house is a mess, and you're a mess..."
"It's got some sort of eggplant dip but as a sauce?" he stifled a burp with his fist, "It's really good. I bet you'll like it."
"Adam, it's not like you to let yourself go like this."
She took a bite out of her burger.
"Oh shit it is good."
"Told you so! Makes it a little hard to eat."
"You've gotta plan your bites to make sure it doesn't go everywhere," she chuckled.
The sauce had a base of roasted, charred, smoky eggplants mashed into a chunky creamy paste: olive oil, garlic, onion, and lemon juice. The rustic dip combined beautifully with the chickpea burgers.
"So... You wanna tell me what happened?"
Adam stared at her for a few seconds before bursting into tears.
"I'm nothing without him. Nothing!" he sobbed, "I fucked up and lost my angel forever!"
"Adam, don't be a baby."
"I can't breathe without him!!"
She pushed him away.
"Calm down. I can't understand a thing you're saying."
He sniffled, "I'm sorry. I can't tell you what happened um. It's private. He wouldn't want me to."
"Okay."
"But it was all my fault. I made him run away."
"When?"
"Last weekend..."
"Is that why you've been acting so weird all week?"
"I thought he'd change his mind and come back! But he didn't, Nia. What if he's much happier without me? What if he never comes back?"
"Now I don't know what happened but, isn't this the first time you had a problem this serious? It's only been one week, Adam."
"Right. You're right."
"But whatever you did wrong, you must show him that you won't repeat. That you've changed."
"Right... I should."
Nia's hands combed through his locks, detangling them as gently as possible. He felt her fingertips massage his hairline, the scalp and the sides and the back... As she rinsed out the shampoo, drops of warm water traveled down his face; mixed in with his tears.
When she noticed him sobbing quietly, she kissed him on his forehead. Delicately and thoroughly, she applied the conditioner to his hair.
"You're a wonderful friend, Nia."
12.25.2035: Tuesday, Nighttime.
Ted's phone rang.
"Ted! Your phone is ringing... Who the fuck is "Old Man"?"
Ted ran to the phone at the speed of light.
"That's Adam!"
"Oh shit."
"Do I answer it? Oh my god, I'm so nervous."
"Calm down, it's your choice. But remember, even if you choose to answer, you can hang up on his face if you feel uncomfortable. Keep it short, don't let him cry and beg."
"Okay. I'll try."
Jess ran out of the room. Ted took a deep breath, and answered the phone.
"Hey..."
"Hi, Adam..."
"How's it going?"
"Good. How about you?"
"Good. I'm good. I just wanted to wish you a merry Christmas."
"Huh. Thought you didn't care for Christmas."
"I don't. But I guess you kinda do. As a holiday, I mean."
"Yeah. Kinda. Happy holidays, man."
There was a pause.
"I don't know who you're staying with, um... I know it's my card, but... Please offer to pay rent, and help with groceries, okay?"
"I've been cleaning and cooking for them, but yeah, might be a good idea."
"I think of you every day, Ted."
In the background, Adam sniffled quietly.
"Me too." he gulped, "Dude, I missed your voice."
"And I missed yours."
"I'm happy we could talk, man... Talk to you again later, okay?"
Adam bit his tongue.
Damn. We’re only gonna speak for thirty seconds? That’s it?
"Okay. Talk to you later..."
12.26.2035: Wednesday, Daytime.
Ted and Jessica were checking Ted’s contacts list.
Abby, Anastazja,
Babe,
Becky who used to be Becky #2 (Not to be confused with Becky#2 who’d blocked him.),
Bianca, Blaze,
Chelsey,
Cindy who he’d previously saved as Syndy,
Crybaby,
Dad,
Dakota,
Emerald, Emi,
Fran,
FratBrett, FratCobra, FratColin, FratDave and FratMike,
Fred,
Gwen,
HarperThey who he’d saved like that to make sure he didn’t forget their pronouns,
Imani,
Jessica #2 and Jessica #3. He had to explain to Jessica that she was Jessica number 2. She was… calmer than I would’ve been,
Julie,
Kelsey, Kiyomi,
Lake, Logan,
Madhu,
Mom,
Monet,
Nhung,
Old man,
Paisley, Phoebe,
Rachel who used to be Rachel3,
Rita, Rose,
Scott was new.
Tamira,
Tony was new.
Vivian.
“It’s not so bad,” said Jessica.
“You’re only saying that because you don’t know what it used to look like.”
“Ted, there’s no need to be greedy. A small number of friends that you actually know and like are much better than a long list of strangers.”
“Look, you are right, but I can’t—”
“Maybe if you stop treating people like numbers, they’ll like you more.”
“Jessica. You’re misunderstanding it—”
“How should I understand it then?”
She crossed her arms, turned away.
“Fine… You’re right. There’s no way to make this sound good. I'm so sorry."