Chapter Text
Halloween '93, a day Max will remember as the day he outed himself as a virgin. (And summoned a bunch of witches but that's not important.)Despite the events of the day before, Max was happy. After Thackery and his sister went onto the great hoochie in the sky, Max, Dani, and Allison returned to Max's house, only to come to their first issue. THE EXORBITANT PROPERTY DAMAGE. Max looked on in a sort of horror, realizing his parents were at the house around this time. Dani and Max rushed inside, only to find his parents knocked out on the couch. They sighed a breath of relief, as Max nearly fell asleep, but Dani shook him up.
"MAX HOW ARE WE GOING TO FIX THE HOUSE?!" Dani screamed, as Max tried desperately to shush her.
"Dani shut the fuck up! I can fix this.. maybe-" He began, but Dani quickly interrupted
"How?!"
"I don't know okay! Give me like 4 seconds.."
He quickly rushed upstairs, to begin his evil schemes
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Jenny and Dave woke up at 7:39 PM, incredibly exhausted. Once they saw burn marks from up the stairs, they quickly rushed up, seeing the property damage. Max and Dani were outside, picking up pieces of the collapsed area, which they'd piled up on the side of the road.
'What happened?!" Jenny screamed, alerting Max and Dani to their presence.
"Some dipshit set up a bomb last night!" Max yelled up.
"WHAT?!" Jenny and Dave yelled out in horror.
One police call later, Jay and Ernie were being arrested on count for 3 counts of attempted murder, and domestic terrorism. Max sighed a breath of relief, knowing his bullies would be gone for exactly 49 years.
Tomorrow was supposed to be a school day, but Max and Dani were staying home for "trauma caused by the explosion". In truth, it was so they could process what happened yesterday, Dani had been crying mainly because her cat wasn't here anymore, and Max was beginning to question some things.
"Am I gay?" He blurted out, quickly clasping his hands over his mouth in panic. Dani looked at him, inquisitively.
"What's that-"
"Nothing!" Max interrupted, Dani looked at him suspiciously, but didn't question it. As she began crying again, Max began to recollect his thoughts when he saw Thackery: (I want that fucking dick-) (Holy shit he's muscular-) (No no stay!) (WHY!) (Oh my fucking God..) (I want to grip his hair while he sucks me off-)
That's when he finally realized it.
"HOLY SHIT I'M GAY!"
He shouted out, which made Dani, Jenny, and Dave turn their heads to him in unamusement.
"Took you this long?" Dani asked,
"We knew, honey." Jenny added,
"You think I can't see your tabs on the family computer." Dave remarked, making Max's face turn as red as the pumpkin Jenny was painting for some reason.
"Sh-shut up!" Max yelled, falling on the ground and running to his room. Dave and Jenny chuckled to themselves, while Dani smirked.
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Max laid awake at 5:38 AM, on November 2nd, 1993. Today was the 'Day of the Dead', so the schools were shut down. As Max lay awake, he thought to himself.
(I really wanna see Thackery again, plus, it would make Dani happy.)
Thus began Max's scheming, and then a perfect idea came into his head, one that would change the trajectory of his love life forever.