Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Harry drags himself up the stairs of his building. The elevator is still broken, though Harry can't remember a time when it wasn't since he moved into the flat, meaning he had to carry all his moving boxes and furniture up into the fifth floor two years ago. Now though, its three am on a Friday night and Harry has still two flights of stairs ahead of him. For a second, he contemplates just sitting down and sleeping in the hallway, probably ending up with Mrs Bakshi from the fourth floor waking him up at 6.30 am with her walking stick when she goes to walk her dog. It's a risk he would take if that means he gets to sleep now. He feels dizzy, his gaze blurred with exhaustion, and his limbs are all aching. Harry pulls himself up by the hand railing, the stairs not seeming comfortable at all compared to his nest that he is craving so much right now. 

Slowly, with his eyes barely open anymore Harry makes his way further up the stairs. He passes Mrs Bakdshi’s flat and stumbles a bit, flinching harshly when her dog starts to bark violently. Heart suddenly beating faster, Harry rushes up the last eighteen steps leading to his floor, praying that he didn’t wake up anyone with the dog’s barking. Harry searches through his purse until he finds his keys, pulling them out and putting the right one in the lock. He looks back once, to the door opposite of him, before he turns his key and opens his door, letting it fall shut behind him and leaning against it. His head is throbbing and his ears are ringing. There is a sheen of sweat coating him, and he knows if he gets into his nest like this, he’ll have to redo it again the next day and he’s not sure he’s in the right state of mind for that. His nest is good right now. Not perfect, far from perfect, and it doesn’t always have the effect that a nest should have. But it’s his nest and he spent time on it and he knows he wouldn’t be able to deal with dissembling it right at the moment. 

Harry steps out of his shoes and drops his purse on the ground. He just remembers to lock the door before he makes his way into the kitchen where he grabs a glass that he fills with cool water from the sink. Leaning against his counter, Harry looks out the window into the starless sky. The moon’s crescent shines brightly into his flat and it’ll soon make room for the sun. 

Harry takes slow sips from his glass, stopping once he emptied half of it before he makes his way into the bedroom, falling face first into his bed. He rolls on his side and looks into the corner that’s hidden from the entrance view where he’s built his nest before he closes his eyes with a single tear rolling down his face. 

He was out with his friends, celebrating… He’s not even sure what the reason was, all he knows is that he didn’t even want to join them in the first place and just had a hard time saying no. This time, it was some kind of beach club; the floor covered in sand, the waiters, who were all omegas, wearing straw skirts that barely covered anything with coconut bras and flower necklaces. The drinks were served in pineapples and coconut with straws and little colourful umbrellas. 

They get together almost every night, doing things together that more often than not end up with them sitting in a bar or dancing their night away in a club. 

Harry hates crowds, has always been anxious about big gatherings and too many people being stuffed into one room. Loud noises make him flinch and strong scents overwhelm his sensitive nose too easily. Meeting people makes his palms sweat and going to new places his stomach churn. He’s always been like that. He’s always been this pathetic excuse of an omega and his mom went to more doctors with him than he can count, thinking something was wrong with her son, but they couldn’t find anything. He was a perfectly healthy omega, except for the fact that strong musky alpha scent make him dizzy and he experiences irregular drops.

Harry has given up on finding answers to his problems. He lives by the motto “fake it till you make it“ and he succeeds. Somehow he manages to pull through all of these outings without showing anyone how his body reacts. 

Harry turns over and grabs a pillow that he cuddles into his chest, falling into a fitful sleep. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Feeling hungover despite having only had one cocktail and one shot before sticking to mocktails for the rest of the night, Harry wakes up the next morning with a groan. 

He seems to have turned in his sleep, being met with the sight of his nest again once he blinks open his eyes. Harry squeezes them shut again and rolls onto his back, his arms and legs spread form his body like a starfish.The sun is shining into his room, warming it up uncomfortably because Harry hadn’t closed the blinds. There are rainbows and silver reflections on his ceiling and walls, his mirrorballs and sun catchers that he’s hung near his window reflecting the light. 

Harry throws his right arm over his face, shielding his eyes. He feels disgusting, probably smells that way too, and he knows he has to get up. He has to shower and wash his sheets and he’s been putting off cleaning his bathroom for way too long now. 

Harry falls asleep again. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

The next time Harry wakes up, the room feels so stuffy that Harry feels like he can’t breathe anymore. He sits up with a frown, the headache he had last night still prominent. Or maybe it’s a new one, he’s not sure. He gets up from his bed, eyes straying to where his nest is calling for him. Pouting, Harry opens his window to let some air in, only to find it almost as stuffy as the air in his room. Making his way into the living area, Harry opens the door to his balcony, hoping that way the air will circulate better. 

Harry pours away the water he’d left on the counter, refilling the glass with fresh water and downing it before he puts on the kettle. He props himself against the counter with his arms, looking down at the empty glass. He feels worn out and he knows it’s not just tiredness. It goes deeper than that. 

Harry just needs a break. He’s been going out almost every night now for the past… three? four? weeks? Harry’s not even sure anymore. Summers are always a blur of parties and outings, and dates with alphas his friends have set him up and that Harry has no interest in but feels too bad saying no to. Taking a deep breath, Harry leaves his kitchen and goes into his bathroom. He ignores the pile of dirty clothes that are spilling out of the basket he always puts them in and gets rid of his clothes so he can finally take a shower. 

He takes his time, letting the hot water pour over his skin until he doesnt feel sweaty or greasy anymore. The bathroom fills with the scent of lavender when Harry lathers his body with his favourite shower gel and he's immediately soothed by it. Harry is quite sensitive when it comes to scents which becomes quite a struggle the moment he's surrounded by alphas and omegas, sometimes even betas who don't use scent neutralisers. Once he's scrubbed his body and washed his hair, Harry steps out of the shower and grabs his pink towel, drying himself off before he wraps himself into it. 

He goes into his bedroom and before he does anything else, he strips his sheets from his bed. The shower has made him feel a lot better, the heat of the water like a warm hug that made his limbs hurt less and Harry wants to use the spurt of energy he got from his shower to be productive. He stuffs the dirty sheets into his washing machine and starts it immediately before he gets out fresh ones and puts them on. Then, he dresses himself in a blue tracksuit. It consists of a pair of shorts with two brown stripes along the sides that end in little bows. The jacket has the same two brown stripes running along the arms and has two bows on either side of the hip, the fabric there able to be cuffed by pulling the string of the bows tighter. Beneath the jacket, Harry puts on a tank top, just in case he gets too warm though he doubts that. He runs cold easily, another side effect that comes with being an omega. 

Harry grabs some of his favourite pieces from his nest, a blanket that he made himself, a pillow that he's had since he was just a pup with a sage green cover, and lastly, his favourite stuffie, a little cow with black spots. He brings all of that outside on his balcony and carefully puts it down on the sofa he has there. It's big, waterproof and comfortable, perfect to have naps on in summer in the soothing warmth of the sun. He goes inside to his kitchen where he grabs a plate, starts to cut up some fruit and grabs a Franzbrötchen, a bakery treat he discovered on a trip to Germany. It's like a mixture between a croissant and a cinnamon bun but smashed and Harry has craved it for months since he came back from Germany, only to find that the sweet treat does not exist in the UK, so he took matters into his own hands and baked them himself. The first three batches didn't turn out good at all, they were burned or the dough wasn't how it's supposed to be, closer to a cinnamon bun than a croissant, but Harry was determined and didn't give up until they slowly turned into something edible. By now, he's certain he’s perfected the recipe and he almost always has some in his flat. 

Lastly, Harry grabs his chamomile tea, having read it helps with anxiety, and places a bag into his favourite cup. It's beige and has an unnatural shape, with black spots all over that look like paint specks and inside on the bottom is a little mushroom figure. He waits until the tea has steeped before he throws the bag away and grabs his plate and the mug and makes his way outside. Harry puts both items on the table and grabs the blankets he has stored away for outside, building something akin to a nest. He scents some of the fabrics before he arranges them on the sofa until he's somewhat satisfied with how it looks. His pillow comes up where his head rests, same as his stuffie and the blanket used for covering him. It's not like it's super cold out, but again, Harry gets cold easily and he hates laying anywhere without being covered at least somewhat with a blanket or something. 

He gets comfy and grabs the book he’s left there, some romcom where he doesn’t have to think too much and can just escape all his worries. He sips from his tea and eats his breakfast  in between pages, following the story of how the love interest escaped to the main character’s bed and breakfast on a remote island. 

Eventually though, Harry feels himself getting tired so he dog-eared the page and put the book back on the table before he turns and rolls up on his side, closing his eyes and dozing off in the sun. 

It’s a much needed nap that Harry wakes up from two hours later with his headache mostly gone. He stretches and yawns before he sits up, rubbing his eyes. 

“Oh you’re awake.“ Harry is not proud of the squeak he lets out at the strange voice, a sound that’s too close to an omega screech. “Oops sorry, didn’t mean to startle you.” The voice says again and Harry looks up into concerned blue eyes; the bluest, prettiest eyes he’s ever seen. 

Harry straightens his posture again, his heart is still beating at a concerning pace and his hands are trembling, but the man standing on the other balcony that’s right next to Harry’s with barely any space between doesn’t seem like that much of a threat upon further inspection. 

He has brown feathery hair with some greys peaking out at the side, though he doesn’t seem old at all, not much older than Harry anyway. He has tanned skin, crinkles by his eyes. and a round nose. His lips are pink and he has a stubble. He’s wearing a black vest with green trackpants. Tattoos are peaking out from underneath his shirt, on his chest and his arm. He’s leaning over to Harry’s balcony, still looking concerned, but there is a small smile forming on his lips while Harry is just staring at him with wide eyes. 

“No it’s- fine. I’m fine,” Harry rasps out, voice still heavy with the traces from his nap. He does his best at giving a small, nice smile, though he still wonders how that person got onto that balcony in the first place. The flat has been empty for over a year now. 

“You sure?” The stranger asks again and Harry nods. 

“Yeah, yeah I am,” he says, sure he’s looking like a frog with the way he’s smiling awkwardly. “Are you uhm… Did you break in there? Or… are you a squatter ?!” Harry asks, his smile turning into a frown. Usually the residents get informed whenever someone’s new moving in and Harry doesn’t recall any notice. 

The stranger laughs and shakes his head. “No, nothing like that. I actually moved in. Or am moving in right now. Everything’s still kinda in boxes and my beds just a mattress. I just wanted to introduce myself but when I came out earlier you were asleep so I didn't want to disturb you.”

Harry’s frown deepens because it sounds like this strange man has been watching him sleep for however long now. He looks back to his balcony door, trying to figure out a way to excuse himself. 

“Oh shit no, that totally sounds like I was staring at you the whole time doesn’t it? I promise I didn’t. I was sorting through my books and just came out here to get some fresh air. Is your flat also too warm? It’s so stuffy in there, I can barely handle it. I think I need to get an air conditioner soon, but then again, summer’s slowly coming to an end, isn’t it? And I’m still talking… you must think I’m a total weirdo. I’m not- at least I don’t think I am? My name’s Louis but I’m not French,” he says, cheeks slightly red as he holds his hand up for Harry. 

Harry eyes him before he slowly gets up and puts his hand in Louis’.

“I’m Harry,” he says, a small smile on his lips that grows fainter when the wind blows in his direction and he picks up the a scent of tea. For a split moment, Harry thinks Louis is an omega just like himself. The scent is light enough that he could pass as one but there are these underlying tones of cinnamon to it, that albeit present are barely there, let Harry know it’s unmistakably an alpha that’s standing in front of him. 

He’s a cute, rambling alpha, but an alpha nonetheless. And if there is one thing Harry doesn’t need in his life it’s another alpha. He suppresses the urge to hide the scent glands on his throat. He’s not wearing any scent neutralisers nor a ribbon to protect them. 

“Nice to meet you Harry. I’d bake you some cake as a greeting but I’m a horrible cook,” Louis says, still smiling. 

“I think, usually the ones already living there bring over the cake,” Harry responds. “But, I’m not a great baker either so, no cake from me, I’m sorry,” he lies. He’s an amazing baker. 

“Oh, that’s fine,” Louis chuckles. 

“Right, well I have to head back inside but welcome to your new home?” Harry points with his thumb towards his balcony door, but it sounds more like a question than anything else. 

“Yeah of course. See ya,” Louis says easily and Harry nods, waving once before he rushes inside. 

He closes the door behind him and makes his way into his bedroom, grabbing his phone that has been charging and lies down in his nest, immediately finding it uncomfortable without his pillow, stuffie, and blanket. 

He sighs and unlocks his phone, looking through his messages. There are pictures from last night being sent in the group chat and Harry absently looks through them until he gets to the new messages. His friends have already made plans for the night and Harry doesn’t feel like going out at all, but he ends up agreeing anyway. 

He takes another nap in his nest until he eventually wakes up to eat some dinner. He’s slept away almost the whole day and he feels bad about it. He should’ve made more use of his Sunday before the week starts again and he’s back to work, but he was too tired. Harry puts some veggies in the oven, preparing a dip for them and then leaving them to roast while he gets ready. They just planned to go to a pub and while Harry knows that his friend's night won't end there, he wants to leave it at that. 

His body has been screaming at him to take a break for a couple of weeks now. And Harry knows the signs, knows enough about his biology to know that he's straight up running himself into touch starvation and a drop. Yet, he can’t say no to his friends. 

Harry puts on some black fishnet tights, a black frilly skirt, and a black cropped tank top that has a red print on it. Around his neck he ties a red ribbon, hiding his scent glands. He does his skincare, making sure to add sunscreen before he dabs some sparkly eyeshadow on his lids and looks for a red lipstick he can put on once he's eaten. 

He eats sitting on his sofa, watching New Girl on his laptop and wondering, once again, when he’ll find his Nick Miller, between all these douchebag alphas he's met so far, it seems like it might never happen.  

Once all his dishes are cleaned up, Harry puts on the lipstick, slips into his Doc Martens, and grabs his purse from the night before, only throwing in the lipstick, his keys, and phone before he leaves his flat. 

Fortunately, the bar is within walking distance and Harry spots his friends sitting outside at a table. 

“Hey,” He smiles at them, interrupting their chat. They all grin up at him and Harry tries to not make a face at all the strong scents wafting his way. 

“‘Sup H,” Theo greets him, sitting on the outside, closest to Harry. He gets up, allowing Harry to slip in on the bench. He's an alpha, with brown hair and brown eyes, slightly taller than Harry. 

“Did you get home okay last night?” River asks, sitting across from Harry. Like Theo, he is an alpha as well, wearing glasses, with a face full of freckles and red hair. 

“Yeah, I almost fell asleep in my hallway but I made it.” He chuckles, making the others laugh. Usually they’re a group of 8, but Lola and Flo seem to be missing. 

The waitress comes, and Harry orders himself a cocktail, while Cato and Dayaa each order a round of shots for their group. 

“Oh my god Harryyyy,” Banks almost screams later that evening. The blonde beta is sitting all the way on the other side of the table, looking at Harry. “I’ve got this new co-worker and he's suuuuper hot. And single! Isn't that amazing?!” They're a couple of drinks in already, Harry’s feeling tipsy himself and he doesn't plan on staying any longer. His friends are all looking at him now, though, so Harry smiles. 

“It’s great?” He asks, unsure where this is supposed to lead. 

“It's spectacular, because you’re single too!” 

“Uhm yeah but-”

“Anyway I told him all about you and he would love to go on a date! You have to go H!” He continues as Harry's smile fades. 

“I really don’t, Banks,” Harry says. 

“Oh, come on H,” Dayaa says, an omega herself. “It’ll be fun.” She grins, leaning against Cato who kisses her cheek. 

“Omegas need a relationship. Having an Alpha brings lots of advantages for us. You really need one,” She continues and Harry bites his bottom lip. 

“Yeah H, you're not getting any younger,” River adds. 

“So I can give him your number? Ace!” Banks grins, getting his phone out as Harry sighs. There is no use in arguing with his friends over this, he's tried before and they did not listen. 

“C’mon H, another drink?” Theo asks him quietly, bumping their shoulders together. When Harry looks at him, there is an almost apologetic smile on his face. Theo has always been his favourite. 

By the time Harry gets home, he feels as awful as he had the night before. He drags himself up the stairs, whines when he doesn't get his shoes off on the first try, almost crying when he falls on his bum while he pulls off the first one. Wanting nothing more than to have a good cry in his nest, Harry walks out to his balcony, wiping the few tears that are already falling down his cheeks away. He’s cold and tired and woozy, both from the alcohol and the state of his body. 

“Hey, you okay?” Harry startles and looks up to where Louis is leaning against the railing of the balcony, smoking something that, after Harry gets over his first shock, identifies as weed. 

Not sure whether to nod or shake his head, Harry just grabs his things and rushes back inside. 

Harry regrets his nightly activities even more when he has to wake up at 6.30 am to get ready for his day. He showers, though he can barely keep his eyes open and feels like he's going to pass out any second underneath the hot spray of his shower. He manages, getting out with black and white spots dancing in front of his eyes. He wraps the towel around himself and gets dressed in his blue tracksuit again. He sits down at his desk and opens his laptop. 

Harry’s flat has three rooms, a bedroom, his kitchen and living area, and a second bedroom that he’s turned into an office. He’s been working remote ever since he graduated college, getting a degree in marketing which allows him to work from home or wherever he goes as long as he’s got internet and a laptop. 

He started at his company as only an intern, working there while he was still studying and they offered him a full time position pretty much as soon as he graduated and Harry took that opportunity. In the two years he’s worked for the company, he has had to fly to Copenhagen where the headquarters are to attend some meetings and events for a week maybe two or three times. 

Harry clocks in and starts by answering his emails that he’s gotten over the weekend. He gets up eventually to open his balcony door to get some air in and to prepare himself some coffee. He’s not the biggest fan of coffee, doesn’t like the way it makes his heart race, but it’s the only thing that will keep him alive and from throwing up. 

He doesn’t stop working until 1 pm when he starts to get hungry and he decides then to take his break, making himself some avocado toast that he takes his time to prepare before he goes out on the balcony to eat it. 

He is sitting on his own for about 10 minutes, mindlessly scrolling through Twitter when he hears the familiar sound of the balcony door next to him being opened. A second later, Louis steps out with a cup in one hand and a cigarette in his other. 

Harry doesn’t say anything, just takes another bite from his toast and chews it silently. 

“Hey Harry,” Louis says, just as Harry swallows, making him choke on the bread and start coughing, his face turning red. 

“Oh shit. you okay?” Harry nods, and gives a thumbs up, still coughing, though he’s trying to suppress them. Tears are welling up in his eyes and he’s very much like to disappear right now. 

“Shit, here; drink this.” Louis holds up his cup and Harry hesitates for a moment before he grabs it and takes a big gulp, burning his tongue the same moment that Louis says, “Careful, it’s hot.” 

“Thank you,” he chokes out, his face burning. He carefully wipes away the tears that have gathered in the corner of his eyes and gives Louis an embarrassed but thankful smile. His tongue feels like it’s on fire and he’s no idea what he just drank but he hands Louis his cup back. 

“Are you okay?” Louis asks and Harry nods. 

“Never been better,” he replies, making Louis chuckle. 

“Listen about last night-“ Louis starts, bright eyes turning concerned. Harry interrupts him before he can finish his sentence. 

“Actually, I have to head back inside. I only had a short break. But it was nice seeing you! Thank you for the… coffee?” Harry asks, walking backwards and Louis frowns. 

“It’s tea,” Louis says and Harry nods. 

“Right, tea. Well thanks for that.” Harry turns and walks back inside. 

It’s not long after that, that Harry receives a message from an unknown number. Already having an inkling of what the message could say, Harry sighs and looks at the notification. 

Hey Harry, it’s Stephen! Banks told me a lot about you and from what I got you seem like a lovely omega! I would love to get to know you more closely. Do you have time Friday evening? I’d like to take you out! xx

Harry looks at the guy's profile picture, scrunching his nose. He’s at least 35 from the looks of it and there is a child in the picture with him. Now, Harry is well aware it could be a relative, though he doubts that. The pup seems to be not much older than four. Harry is not ready to play house yet, nevertheless dating an alpha who seems to be almost ten years older than him. 

Harry opens his chat with Banks instead of replying. 

Banks?! You didn’t tell me he has a daughter  and is like what? 35?!

Oh, right

He’s 34 tho!

Not helpful tbh

Oh come on H. He’s a good lad. Give it a chance for me!

You owe me!

Yeah yeah, whatever 

Harry rolls his eyes and re-opens his chat with Stephen, typing a quick reply. 

Hey Stephen, Friday sounds good! Just let me know when and where and how I should dress and then we’re all set! x 

Harry locks his phone after that, not feeling like seeing Stephen’s answer yet. Instead, he fully concentrates on his work. He clocks out at 5 pm and checks his phone, ignoring Stephen’s reply and instead opening his group chat with his friends. They all planned to get dinner together and Harry is about to respond that he can’t go when Theo tags him and asks him directly. Feeling bad saying no, Harry agrees to join them. 

They go to one of those hip, overpriced places where the portions are way too small. Harry ordered himself some vegan dish with avocado and quinoa and ended up sharing dessert with Theo afterwards, both of them still feeling more than hungry. 

“So, Stephen texted you?” Banks interrupts Harry’s conversation with Theo over their Cherry Blossom Panna Cotta. 

“Uhm yeah. Still not happy about the fact that he’s got a pup and is over 10 years older than me,” Harry says carefully, not wanting to upset his friend but also needing to get his point across. 

“He what ?” Theo asks shocked and Harry hums quietly. 

“You always say how much you want a family one day.” Banks shrugs. 

“Yeah, one day. Not right now? Next time you plan on playing matchmaker, maybe tell me some info about the person you’re setting me up with.” 

“You could’ve said no though,” River said and Harry gives him a look. 

“From the sound of it, Banks pretty much confirmed to him that I would agree on the date. I couldn’t just say no and you know that.” 

“So, what’s the big deal?” Dayaa asks. “He’s an alpha, he has a pup. He’s probably mature and knows what he wants in life. You always say you want someone mature.” 

“Yeah,” Harry sighs. “I- whatever. We’re going on a date on friday. But that’s the last date I'm going on with any of your coworkers or friends or random people you meet somewhere and think would be fitting to me. I’m tired of it.” 

“You’re being mean H, we’re only looking out for you.” Cota says. 

“Right, and that’s sweet but-“

“Well then it’s settled,” Lola interrupts him. She’s a beta though, her world views often give off toxic alpha. “Just go on the date and let yourself be spoiled a bit.” 

Harry stays silent after that. 

After their dessert is gone, he pays for his dinner, taking care of their dessert as well before he gets up. Theo insists on walking him home. 

“I have an early morning tomorrow guys, I’ll see you,” he says, waving his hand and waits for Theo to say his goodbyes. 

“The dessert was kinda weird wasn’t it?” He asks once they are outside and Harry nods. 

“Definitely! I don’t get Lola’s and Dayaa’s obsession with these places,” Harry says with a small giggle. 

“Also it’s so expensive! Like I know we’re all working full time but damn this is horrible.” 

“Unfortunately, we’re out voted. Cota will do whatever Dayaa wants and Flo

will do whatever Lola wants. And River and Banks pretty much also do whatever Cota wants.” 

“It’s horrible,” Theo laughs and Harry nods agreeingly. They walk towards the train station, talking about the dinner until the date comes up again. 

“You know you don’t have to go, right? If you actually don’t want to,” Theo says and Harry nods. 

“I do. It’s hard to say no to them sometimes, they really know how to be persuasive. But going on a date doesn’t hurt me, so it’s fine.” He shrugs. 

“Do you think… Do you think they would judge you if you weren’t into alphas? But… I don’t know… Into omegas?” Theo asks just as the train arrives at the station. Harry regards him for a moment before shrugging. 

“They’re kinda stupid. But I think they always only mean good. At the end of the day, it wouldn’t matter to me. If they don’t accept me the way I am, I don’t need them,” Harry explains matter-of-factly. 

“But.. Do you feel completely accepted by them? I mean H, they’re constantly harassing you about getting pups and finding an alpha and you’re only 23. They’re all single except for Cota and Dayaa. Flo’s an Omega too and she never gets that treatment. They… they use you to their advantage. I mean what about that one time River sent you on a date with his manager so he’d get a promotion.“

“I know. But I agreed to do it. And it worked. I went on two dates with him and River got his promotion and everything was fine.” Harry shrugs. It wasn’t fine, though. The guy was a groper, never letting go of his ass and squeezing it like Harry was his personal plaything. He kissed him without Harry consenting in any form whatsoever and Harry had a nasty drop afterwards. But that’s not the point he wanted to get across. He knew Theo wasn’t exactly like the rest of his friends. But he also knows that Theo grew up with River and he’s not sure how much of their conversation will end up being told to River later. 

“Theo, if you’re into alphas, Or betas or whatever or neither… that’s fine you know? That’s okay. And it’s nothing that you should have to hide or be ashamed of,” Harry says, giving his friend a reassuring smile. 

“Thank you, Harry,” Theo replies honestly, a shy smile on his face. 

“You don’t have to walk me home,” Harry says once they arrive at his station. 

“You sure?” Theo asks and Harry nods. 

“Positive.” He hugs his friend before stepping off as soon as the doors open and waves one last time before he makes his way out of the station. The walk to his apartment is about 10 minutes long and Harry passes it by listening to Stevie Nicks. He can feel the tiredness seep into his bones as soon as he’s alone. He’s good at ignoring how much it actually exhausts him to be out with his friends but the second he’s alone, it’s like whatever string is holding Harry together during the day snaps in half and breaks, leaving Harry drained and feeling lost. 

He undresses and slips into a shirt for sleeping, glad that it’s only 10.30 pm and that he’ll get some sleep. He checks his phone while he’s brushing his teeth and reads over Stephen’s message. He’s inviting him to a black tie work event, unusual for a first date, but maybe Harry’s lucky and if everything goes wrong Banks will be there to keep him company. 

However, a work event also means a room full of people. Harry already knows the weekend will be long. He does his skin care, cataloguing all of his outfits in his head and contemplating what to wear. Once he’s done, he sends Stephen a confirmation before he puts his phone on do not disturb and crashes into his bed, falling asleep almost immediately. 

It's 3 a.m. when Harry wakes up, completely disoriented and sweaty. It takes him a couple of moments, maybe even minutes, to realise what's happening. Once he does, Harry knows it'll take hours to fall asleep again. He's shaky, his heart racing, certain he had a nightmare, though he can't remember what it was about.

Harry sighs and stands up carefully only to sit back down again when he feels too dizzy. He waits a few moments before he tries again and this time, it seems to work, and he manages to walk to his kitchen. He grabs a tall glass and fills it with water before he steps out on his balcony, feeling like he can barely breathe anymore. Harry slumps down on his sofa, leaving out a shaky whine. 

His omega is clawing at him, wanting something , something that Harry can’t figure out what it is. 

Harry hides his face in his hands, trying to take a deep breath but failing each time, ending with him gasping for air. 

Frustrated, Harry removes his hands and looks straight ahead, jumping when he notices something in the corner of his eye. 

“Fuck, I forget you live here. What are you doing outside?” Harry asks Louis, who seems to be smoking another joint. 

“Could ask you the same,” he counters. Harry nods, cool sweat is forming on his forehead and above his lip. 

“Fair enough,” Harry agrees quietly, still panting. Louis takes another drag, but seemingly doesn’t feel like making any more conversation. 

“Want a drag?” Louis asks eventually and Harry’s immediate reaction is to shake his head. He doesn’t smoke weed, would actually like to stop drinking alcohol too. But then he nods. Maybe, it’ll help him fall back to sleep. 

He gets up and walks over to Louis who holds the joint up for him to take. Harry takes a drag, and then after a moment another. He’s glad he doesn’t make a fool of himself again and erupts in a coughing fit. He hands it back to Louis after, deeming that enough and the alpha takes it wordlessly. 

Harry turns so he can look down the street instead of the wall of his flat and he focuses on his breathing while Louis smokes the rest of the joint. They don’t talk but it’s less awkward than Harry thought it would be. Instead, they stand there in silence, both caught in their own heads. There’s a loud honking sound and then the loud screech of a cat followed by barking that makes Harry giggle at how close to a movie scene it is. 

“I think I’m heading back inside. Have to get up early,” he says and Louis nods, taking the last drag before he stubs the cigarette out on the railing, leaving a smudge of ash. 

“Good night, Harry.” he says and Harry smiles at him. 

“Good night, Louis.” 

It’s a testament as to how bad Harry’s been treated by alphas in his life that he’s genuinely surprised Louis hasn’t asked him out yet. But it’s good, the last thing Harry needs is drama with his next door neighbour. 

Harry goes back inside and closes the door behind him before he drags himself into his nest where he curls up, and luckily falls asleep pretty quickly. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

It's Friday evening and Harry is getting dressed for his date. He’s putting on sage green pants with a cream, almost see through shirt, when there is a knock on his door. Harry looks through the peep hole and sees Louis standing there. 

Carefully, he opens the door for the alpha. 

“Hey,” he says with a smile. His cheeks are flushed red, there is what seems to be flour on his nose and right cheek, some on his forehead, and even more on his maroon t-shirt. 

“Hi,” Harry says, raising a brow. 

“Do you maybe have some eggs? I’m on uncle duty tonight and they were persistent on making pancakes and- have you ever tried to say no to the big round eyes pups given you? Like obviously I know that pancakes are not a very nutritious dinner but I also think as an uncle it’s my duty to let them break all the rules. Give them their first tattoos and piercings and help them sneak out at night without their parents knowing- not that I wouldn't make sure they’re safe at first! Obviously not, I’d never let them get in harm's way but.. have fun, let them live you know? They probably won’t even remember any of this.”

“Uhm sure. Fun uncles are nice,” Harry says and Louis nods. 

“Thank you. I’m trying my best. I mean they’re only two and five, so no tattoos or piercings anytime soon, but pancakes for dinner is like a big thing in their world already.”

“So, you need eggs?” Harry asks with a little giggle and Louis nods. 

“I need eggs if I want to prevent a full breakdown because I've got them so excited for these pancakes now. So please, tell me I can be a cool and fun uncle and make pancakes for dinner.”

“I unfortunately don’t have any eggs but there are alternatives you can use!” Harry says. “Do you have any apple sauce? Or soy flour?” 

“Uhm… I just moved in, half my kitchen still is in boxes. I don’t even know why I agreed to babysit in the first place.” Louis sighs and he seems tired, but his eyes are sparkling and there is a soft smile on his face, telling Harry he doesn’t mind one bit and loves his nephews or nieces. 

“You need to unpack, then. Wait here.” Harry holds up a finger before he closes the door behind him again. He goes to his kitchen, grabs some apple sauce from his fridge and the basket with all his chocolate chips and sprinkles, which he knows the pups will probably enjoy. 

He opens the door and hands everything to Louis. “Just add a few spoons of the applesauce to the batter, it’ll work as an egg substitute. Believe me I do it all the time,” Harry adds on when Louis looks at him a bit hesitantly. “And as for the sprinkles and stuff, just let them use whatever they want. I won’t mind if you use them all, I promise. Let them have fun.” 

“Alright, you’re a darling, thank you so much!” Louis says and Harry smiles. 

“You’re welcome, have fun!” Harry grins. 

“They’re a handful, but I love them.” 

“For what it’s worth, I think pancakes for dinner are pretty cool. They’ll remember,” Harry says softly, and Louis sends him a grateful, proud smile. 

“I’ll see you Harry,” Louis says. Harry nods and waves before he closes the door and finishes getting ready. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

The event takes place in a hotel, and when Harry enters the lobby he recognises Stephen immediately. He’s standing there with two champagne glasses in his hands and an almost too bright smile. Harry walks up to him and forces himself to greet him with a kiss to each cheek. 

“You’re tall for an omega,” is the first thing Stephen blurts out and Harry’s eyes widen as he steps back. 

“Uhm…Does that bother you?” He asks, already feeling himself hunching his shoulders and regretting wearing the shoes that have a bit of a heel. He knows he’s taller than the average omega, knows that maybe his hips aren’t wide enough, and his shoulders a bit too broad, but he’s fine with it. He has learned to accept it, at least most days. 

“No! No, of course not!” Stephen rushes to say, his head turning red, and Harry knows then that it’s a blatant lie. 

“Okay, well then,” he says with a forced smile, grabbing the champagne glass from Stephen and almost emptying it completely. 

“You still look lovely tho,” Stephen says, offering his arm for Harry, which he accepts and lets himself be led into the function. 

Immediately upon entrance, Harry’s nose is hit with all the scents, mostly alpha, and is forced to concentrate on breathing through his mouth, less he gets dizzy and drops. 

“So Harry, Banks has told me a few things about you already but I’d love to get to know you some more. You work from home right?” 

Stephen leads them to a tall table, nodding to some people on their way with a complacent smile on his face, his hand resting on the small of Harry's back. Harry keeps his gaze on the floor, biting his bottom lip. Once they arrive at the table, Harry removes himself from Stephen's touch, creating some distance between them. 

“Uhm yeah. I am currently involved in a company specialising in the production of sustainable and eco-friendly heat and scent products, primarily tailored to Omegas, though everyone can use them.” 

“So, it's like omega stuff? Candles and nesting shit?” Stephen asks and Harry presses his lips together.

“Yeah, something like that,” Harry says, biting his tongue. He could go on a rant as to how most products in the world are tailored for alphas, how there are still bars who only serve alcohol to alphas, how alphas still get paid better, still get higher positions in jobs, and how many people still have the world view of the omega staying home and carrying the pups while the alpha works. He could go on a rant on why it's okay that there is a brand just for heats when heats are still so often a taboo topic. He could, but he doesn't, because Stephen already felt threatened in his masculinity by the fact that Harrys taller than him and he knows he wouldn't understand anyway.

“I guess it's good that you work from home. I mean you want pups right?” 

“You’ve got a pup on your own, don’t you?” Harry asks instead of answering and Stephen nods. 

“Yeah, I've got a little daughter. She's three,” he says and Harry nods. 

“That's nice,” he says and Stephen shrugs.

“Yeah, I’ve got her like one weekend every month. She's a handful, I can barely handle her. I think she’ll present as an alpha.” 

“What if she doesn't though?” Harry asks and Stephen genuinely seems taken aback by that question. He looks at Harry, then laughs and shakes his head. 

“No, she is an alpha, I just know it.” 

Harry empties the rest of his glass. 

He's glad when some board member holds a ten minute long speech. Stephen hangs onto every word he says, his back slightly turned towards Harry. Harry grabs another glass of champagne from a passing waiter and places his empty one on the table behind him. He doesn't care much about what Stephen thinks of him anymore, that train has left the station. but he’s still at an event and he doesn't want to come off as an omega without etiquette. 

He’s glad when another waiter passes, holding a tray with finger foods. Harry stops him, grabbing a few and shooting him a grateful smile before the waiter leaves. Stephen is still enraptured by the speech when Harry has finished the little treats, so he passes the time by scanning the room to find Banks. He does so eventually, his friend sitting at one of the tables and drinking what seems to be whiskey. Harry stares daggers at him for the rest of the speech because it's his fault that Harry’s there in the first place. Unfortunately, Banks doesn’t turn his way once. 

The speech ends and Harry is forced to make awkward small talk with Stephen for hours. They don’t find any common interests, no matter how often Harry tries, and instead Stephen ends up giving him a lecture about the benefits of the return of omega etiquette schools. They still exist, sparsely in very small, close minded towns, but they’re frowned upon nowadays. 

It’s only when Stephen excuses himself to talk to a colleague, and Banks isn’t too far away from him, that Harry takes his opportunity and walks up to him, grabbing him by his arm and pulling him backwards. 

“Excuse me, gentlemen,” Banks says with an awkward chuckle, looking at Harry once before he turns and rips his arm away, following him nonetheless. 

“Can’t believe an omega just treated me like that in front of my colleagues!” He says and Harry rolls his eyes. They walk all the way to the side of the room, making sure no one can overhear them. 

“That guy is a total ass Banks, what the fuck?!” Harry asks but Banks just rolls his eyes. 

“He’s alright.” 

“He’s constantly talking omegas down, talking me down!” 

“Look I know but… He’s- he kinda has a say in my next promotion. And I need that promotion H, come one!“ Banks begs and Harry scoffs. 

“I won’t kiss him,” he hisses and Banks pouts. 

“I told him you were easy for that sort of stuff H, please. He’s looking for some fun.”

“You told him what ?!” Harry screeches, mouth wide open in disbelief. “What the fuck is wrong with you Banks?!” 

“Oh, come off it Harry. Not like you’ve got to mate him.” 

“No, no of course not. But fuck him?! Is that what you told him? That i’d fuck him on the first date?!” 

Banks only shrugs. “You’ve done it before.” 

“I- I haven’t! What- what’s wrong with you Banks? We’re friends, friends don’t treat each other like this, friends don’t talk about each other like this- I… I don’t even know what to say.” 

“Stop being so dramatic over this, H. It’s not that big of a deal. So what if I told him you easily put out on the first date? It’s what it is.” 

“What- do you know how much danger you’ve put me in?! What if he decided to use his voice on me, huh? Made me do something I wouldn't want to do?! I’m going now and I swear to god, if you even think about talking to me in the near future, you’re a dead man,” Harry says, before he turns and storms off. 

He walks past Stephen who is turned their way and bumps into his shoulder. 

“What happened?” He asks but Harry doesn’t stop. 

He storms out of the hotel, the air still warm outside even though it’s almost midnight. Harry walks a few streets down from the hotel before he stops and calls himself an uber. He’s filled with rage that’s slowly turning into exhaustion. Harry slumps against the wall of the building he’s stopped in front and waits for his uber to arrive. 

When he gets home, there is a plate in front of his door, wrapped in some cling film, with a pink note on it and next to it is Harry’s sprinkles basket. Harry unlocks his door before he picks both items up and carefully lets the door fall into its lock again. He makes his way into his kitchen where he places the sprinkles and the plate down, smiling when he sees that it’s colourful looking pancakes. Harry picks up the note and opens it. 

little ones insisted on sharing some with you x

ps: you don’t!! have to eat them just bring the plate inside so they think you did thank you so much for saving my ass 

pps: i ate the rest of the apple sauce while we watched Bambi (since when is this movie so sad?! how is this appropriate for kids?) but i promise i'll buy you a new jar as soon as the little ones are picked up by their parents. 

It’s signed by Louis and then, in messier handwriting with some of the letters mirrored, by Evie 2 and Cornelius 5. Harry can’t help but let out a little giggle as he unwraps the cling film. The pancakes look like they have at least one of every kind of sprinkles Harry owns in them but they smell vaguely like cinnamon and Harry’s had a shit evening so he grabs one and rolls it together to take a bite. They are way too sweet and Harry wonders if one of the little ones, or maybe even Louis, put too much sugar on accident. Still, he eats the whole plate and then gets ready for bed, only to end up cuddling himself into his nest. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Harry is awoken by loud, unhappy screeching and wailing. The sun is shining through his window, telling him that he once again forgot to close his curtains. It takes Harry a few moments to gain consciousness, but then he hears the loud screeching and screaming again and he’s sitting up within seconds. 

Concerned, Harry follows the noise that leads him to his balcony. He opens the door and the distressed sounds get louder as he steps outside. It’s very obviously coming from Louis' apartment and upon closer inspection, Harry can even hear the alpha’s gentle voice, though he cannot make out what Louis is saying. 

“Who are you?” Startled, Harry looks down and there, standing in the middle of Louis balcony is a little boy looking up at him with big curious eyes. He’s still wearing his Spiderman themed pyjamas and his cheeks are full and red. His little feet are naked and his hair is a blonde mess. 

“I’m Harry,” Harry replies with a small smile. “And you must be Cornelius?” He guesses and the boy nods. 

“Are you the Harry who gave us the sprinkles?” He asks and Harry nods enthusiastically. 

“Yes, that’s me!” Cornelius purses his lips in an O- shape, making Harry giggle. 

“And did you eat the pancakes?” He asks then. 

“I did. They were really, really good, thank you for sharing with me. Did you have fun with your uncle?” 

“Yeah, but I think Evie’s sick so she’s been crying the whole time and Loulou only takes care of her. It’s annoying,” Cornelius explains with a frown and Harry tries to not laugh at the nickname Loulou and instead takes the little pup seriously. 

“I see. Is Evie your sister then?” Cornelius shakes his head this time. 

“My cousin,” he explains. 

“Lius?” Louis calls, slightly concerned, and moments later he steps outside with a still whiny little girl cradled to his chest. 

“Oh, Harry,” he says. 

Harry smiles at him in a greeting. “Everything okay?” He asks. a

Louis shrugs and nods. “She's sick,” he explains, looking down at who must be Evie and Harry tilts his head to the side with a sorry expression on his face. 

“Lius, can you help me pack all your stuff? Your mum’s coming in a few,” he says and Cornelius sighs. 

“But you promised a movie before we go.” He turns to Louis with a frown and crosses his arms in front of his chest. Harry watches their interaction quietly.

“I know love, and I promise we’ll do that the next time you’re over,” Louis assures, repositioning Evie so he can reach out his hand for him. “Come on, we’ll listen to some music while we get ready,” Louis says. 

“Really Loulou?” Lius gasps excited and Louis looks at Harry who grins and mouths the word Loulou at him. 

“Yeah, really.” Louis smiles. 

“Even Tangled?” 

“Even Tangled.” Louis nods, making Harry look questioningly at them.

“Loulou doesn't like that movie,” Lius explains to Harry and Harry's mouth drops open. 

“ What ?” He asks and Lius nods. 

“I know, right?” 

“Anyway, come on now Lius. Say bye to Harry,” Louis says, his cheeks slightly red under Harry's affronted expression. 

“Bye bye Harry.” Lius waves and Harry mirrors the gesture. 

“Bye Lius.” He smiles at the little pup. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

“So, you hate Tangled?” Harry asks two days later. He had not seen Louis in the past two days and he has yet to give him his plate back, but as it is, Harry's bones feel tired and he has a headache, so he refuses to move. He's lying on his sofa outside, his blanket cuddled to his chest as he lazily blinks up at Louis who is sitting on the railing of his own balcony. It's dangerous, and Harry panicked when he saw Louis jump up there, but the Alpha assured him that he knew what he was doing. There is a cigarette tucked behind his ear that he has yet to light and he's got his coffee mug in his hand, taking sips from it every now and then. Louis has been giving Harry updates on Evie. Apparently, the little girl woke up with an ear infection and Louis was barely able to get her to calm down. Her mum took her to a doctor and she's been given some meds and Louis has been getting updates regularly and she seems to be slowly doing better. 

The alpha is wearing Adidas joggers and an oversized t-shirt, with some band on it that Harry’s never heard of before. 

“I don't hate Tangled, I’ve just seen it more times than I can count. Actually, I'm pretty sure I’ve seen it once or twice every time I hung out with Lius and I usually do something with him once a week. He’s weirdly obsessed with the chameleon.” 

“That's adorable.” Harry smiles and Louis shakes his head. 

“It was adorable the first few times, but now it's just annoying. I've tried watching other movies with him. I mean he’s never even seen Spiderman but loves the pyjamas, so I tried to watch it with him once. And told him it's for big boys. so now word to his mum and he said no Harry. It's a lost cause, I'll be watching Tangled until the day I die. Even getting them to watch Bambi was like a hardship and we all cried during the mum’s death.” 

“So you’re actually not the cool uncle but the grumpy uncle,” Harry giggles and Louis gasps, fake affronted. 

“I'm the best uncle ever, thank you very much. I just can only watch Rapunzel’s hair being cut off so many times. The hair cutting pisses me off more and more each time i watch- like why so fucking short, I don’t get it.”

Harry laughs and shakes his head as best as he can while lounging. “I think it was to prove that her hair is not all that makes her… her, you know? I don't know, I think she looks sweet.” 

“Of course you do,” Louis sighs. “Oh, what I wanted to ask, did you have fun that evening? You were going out right?” 

Harry hesitates for a moment, contemplating whether he should lie and tell Louis he had fun or tell him the truth. 

“Actually no,” he settles on while Louis looks at him intently. 

“You don’t have to talk about it,” he says when Harry is quiet for some time. 

“I know,” Harry sighs. “I was on a date, with an alpha, but I wasn't interested in him. I was doing it as a favour for a friend, but as it always is when it comes to alphas, he was a total arse. No offence,” Harry adds with a sour expression.

“None taken. I know many alphas are fuckheads and think they’re superior.” He shrugs. “I can’t imagine what it must be like for an Omega.”

“Yeah, he was that type of alpha; talking down on me and omegas in general I mean- he even had a pup, a little girl, and he was so focused on her becoming an alpha, I don't think he’ll tolerate anything else. I tried talking to him about my job a bit and all I got as a response was ‘omegas are meant to stay home’. I mean really Louis?! Is that what you all think?” 

“Hey, not all of us,” Louis says, reaching for his cigarette. “But I think a majority still believe in those kinds of roles, the omega staying home and the alpha bringing the money. It's stupid and unfair.”

“It is,” Harry agrees. “Anyway, my friend was there too, it was a work event and we got into a row. So I went home, ate the pancakes which were way too sweet, by the way. You need a new recipe, but it was adorable that they wanted to share. And then I went to sleep.” 

“Sounds like a stressful night,” Louis says and lights his cigarette, overpowering the gentle breeze of cinnamon that was wafting Harry’s way. 

“I’m tired of it,” Harry says mindlessly. “Tired of alphas and not being able to say no. I always say yes, you know? Every time my friends ask me for a favour I always say yes.”

“Why?” Louis asks and Harry shrugs. 

“I don’t know. They’re my friends. They’re all I've got. Well and Niall, but he’s always busy, since his mate got pregnant. Niall lived here before you and then he met Zayn and now they’ve got a house and a pup on the way and I’m still out almost every night wasting away my life.” 

“Oi, now you’re just being dramatic. Everyone lives life at their own pace and if you don’t like the road you’re on, then you just take a turn.” 

“Simple as that?” Harry asks. 

Louis shakes his head, smoke curling around him. “No, it never is, but that’s life.“ Louis pauses to take another drag from his cigarette. “And it’s your choice what you make of it, even if the right choice isn’t what’s easiest. Look I’m not saying to drop your entire social circle, that wouldn’t be easy for anyone. I’m just saying, don’t always let yourself be pushed around, set some boundaries.” 

Harry thinks about Louis’ words for the rest of the day, but when his friends ask him if he’ll join them that night, he finds himself agreeing. 

Chapter Text

The next time Harry sees Louis they’re nowhere near their balconies, or flats. It’s actually a forty minute drive away from their flats that Harry only took because Niall had pretty much begged him to come visit. It didn’t take much convincing, Harry loved them, so he sat himself on the train for thirty minutes and then on the bus for another ten minutes only to get there feeling drained from all the scents. 

“Oh my god you look awful, petal,” Zayn says the moment he opens the door to Harry and pulls him inside and into his arms. Despite his small belly in their way, he still pushes Harry’s nose gently into his neck. Harry relaxes immediately, Zayn and Niall’s scents are the only ones he can really stand being around and finds comfort in. 

“You smell awful too H, what is going on?” Zayn asks. 

“Hasn’t your mom taught you it’s rude to sniff out people?” Harry mumbles, though he’s thankful that for the first time in what feels like forever to have someone who just understands. 

“You smell like you're seconds away from dropping Harry, that’s nothing to joke about,” Zayn chastises gently, scenting the air. “Babe?” He calls into the house and seconds later, Harry can hear footsteps coming their way. 

“Harry is here!” Niall cheers. “What’s wrong?” 

“Can you take him and take care of him? He needs some cuddles. Alpha cuddles.” 

“You sure babe?” Niall asks and Zayn is quiet for a second before Harry can feel him nod. 

“Yeah, I’ll just… go out. I think that is the best solution right now.”

Harry isn’t even embarrassed at the whine he lets out. He wants Niall, wants his orange and spice scent that always reminds him of fall, but he wants Zayn just as much too, wants his scent of rain and flowers by his side. 

“Oh I know darling, but I can’t because of the pup. I think I would start growling at you and it would distress me too much. I know you’re not a threat but pup doesn’t know that yet. Just let Niall cuddle you for a bit and then when I get back we’ll spend some time together too, yeah?” Zayn asks, gently coaxing Harry’s head out of his neck. 

Harry doesn’t drop when Niall takes him from Zayn and wraps his arm around him. He doesn’t drop but his knees do buckle and he feels like he’s about to pass out any second. 

“Oh Harry,” Niall says, holding him tightly. 

“Text me when I can come back!” Zayn says before the door falls close. Niall leads Harry into their sunroom, and sits down with him on their comfy sofa that they have there. 

“Is Zayn mad?” Harry asks quietly, his vulnerable state making him sensitive. 

“No babe. It’s just the pup. It’s hard for him to see his alpha cuddle another omega, especially an unmated one. He wants you to get better and he trusts you and me. He’s not mad, he loves you.” Niall says, gently coxing Harry’s nose into his neck. 

“I’m not sick,” Harry mumbles groggily and Niall hums.  

“Never said you were. But you’re clearly touch starved and you could drop any second. That’s not healthy either,” Niall says softly. 

“I’m not,” Harry argues weekly but he feels how heavy his bones are, feels how his head hurts and how his appetite is barely there, how he’s always anxious and hasn’t been sleeping well. He knows his last heat was supposed to come four weeks ago and never did. 

“It’s okay Haz, we’ll figure it out,” Niall whispers, the sweet scent of oranges in summer surrounding them before Harry falls asleep. 

He wakes up two hours later, feeling a bit less exhausted. He’s still embraced by Niall, surely drenched in the alphas scent. 

“I’m telling Zayn he can come back now. I’m getting a bit worried about him,” Niall says, sounding apologetic. 

“No, it’s fine! I can shower or even leave before he comes. I don’t want to intrude any more.” 

“You’re not H, and you know that,” Niall says, giving his hair a ruffle. “We love you. And pup will love you too.”

Harry smiles with a small blush. “I'm really happy for you two, y'know?” He asks and Niall gives him a blinding smile. 

Zayn comes back, pushing Niall away and sitting down on the sofa, then patting his lap and looking at Harry. Harry bites his lip to suppress the giddy smile that’s overcoming him and rests his head in Zayn's lap, mindful of his belly.

“Make us food Ni, will you?” He asks, smiling down at Harry as he begins to play with his hair. 

“Of course, still good with pasta or do you want something else?”

“Pup’s craving pad thai I think. And sushi. And brownies,” Zayn says, and Harry grins and nods, knowing it’s all their comfort foods. 

“Baby, you’re not supposed to have sushi,” Niall says carefully, making Harry giggle. 

“I know that. But our Harry here is allowed and he should have some. He is like our first pup y’know? We have to spoil him.”  

Harry giggles and shakes his head. “I’m not your first pup.” 

“Yes you are. Other people get a plant or a dog, we had you.” 

“The only reason why I'm not arguing about this right now is because the hair petting feels too good. Never stop.” 

“Never, petal,” Zayn promises. 

Niall orders the food without raising an eyebrow and Harry is sure he would pluck the moon for his mate if Zayn asked. 

“I’m convinced you’ve got the only good alpha there is,” Harry says and Zayn shakes his head. 

“Silly. You’ll find someone.” 

“I’m tired of going on dates. I’m so so tired of it, Zee.”

“You’ll find your person,” Zayn says. It sounds like a promise. 

Harry leaves his friends with a tote bag full of food because Niall ordered a ridiculous amount of it and hoodies from both Zayn and Niall. He also had to swear to them to call them if he got worse. 

Harry did feel a lot lighter walking to the bus station though. It’s still light out and he hums along to his favourite album. He waits patiently for the bus, glad when it arrived after 5 minutes. 

He shows his ticket and walks past rows of seats, when his eyes land on a familiar frame. Louis is sitting there, a hood over his head and earphones in, looking down at what is most likely his phone. Harry hesitates for a moment. The alpha seems like he’d rather be left alone, but Harry doesn’t want to come off as rude or entitled either by ignoring him. The bus has already started moving when Harry finally decides to walk up to him. Luckily, Louis looks up when Harry stops in front of him, his frown turning into a soft smile. 

“Hey, Harry,” he says gently, standing up so Harry can slide into the row, for which he’s grateful. He carefully settles his tote bag with all the take away in his lap and holds on to it while Louis sits down next to him. He removes his headphones, watching Louis do the same. The bus is almost empty, the only other people in there being an elderly couple and a teenager girl. 

“Going home?” Louis asks and Harry nods. 

“Yeah. You?”

“Me too,” he says, smiling at Harry. 

“What were you doing? If you don’t mind me asking?” 

Harry shakes his head. “I don’t mind,” he says. “I was visiting friends. You know, Niall? I think I’ve mentioned him before.” 

“Oh, yeah you did.” Louis nods with recognition. “Did you have fun?” 

“I- I kinda took a nap for a big chunk of my visit but… I needed it. Just relaxing with some friends, you know. And then we ordered food and discussed some more baby names, though I think Zayn already has one picked out and is just indulging me.” 

“That sounds really nice to be honest.”

“It was,” Harry agrees. “What were you doing?” 

“Working,” Louis says and Harry frowns. 

“On a Sunday?” He asks and Louis nods. 

“Yeah. I’m… I’m a social worker and if one of my kids needs me, I’ll be there for them, you know? I can’t tell you too much about it but… it was a long day. Fuck it, a long week,” Louis says. 

Harry looks at him carefully, sees the dark circles under his eyes and the dull blue of his irises. He looks tired, worn. 

“That’s like the most admirable job ever you know? I can’t imagine how hard it must be.”

“It’s not easy,” Louis admits. “But it’s incredibly rewarding. Seeing the kids make progress, giving them hope, and being a part of their journey—it’s why I do this. Sometimes I’m the first person who’s really listened to them or shown them any respect. That’s what makes it hard not to get too attached.”

“You’re not supposed to get attached?” 

“Not really. It’s- you have to stay neutral but I mean I’ve worked with some of these kids since I started. They’re everything to me.”

“That’s amazing Louis,” Harry says and Louis gives him a weak smile. 

“I’m trying my best.” 

“I’m sure you are,.” he says. He bites his lip and looks down, eyes falling on his tote bag. “Hey do you… do you maybe want something to eat?” Harry asks. “My friends gave me all of this food, mainly sushi because Zayn’s obviously not allowed to eat it right now, so… I mean it would last me for two days, so you can have some if you’d like? There’s also some pad thai in there. And brownies. I think even pizza. We were hungry.” Harry giggles quietly as an excuse as to why they ordered so much. 

“I’d love that to be honest,” Louis says. 

They get off the bus and change to the train, riding the last 30 minutes in relative silence. Louis insists on carrying the bag, saying it’s the least he can do, and Harry doesn’t object to that since the bag is surprisingly heavy. 

They get home, agreeing to meet on their balconies after they both have showered. Harry reheats some of the dishes and places some pieces of sushi on two plates, carrying all of it outside to Louis who is already sitting on the railing, smoking a cigarette. Not feeling too hungry, since he already ate way too much earlier, Harry only eats a few pieces of sushi and sneaks three forkfuls of the pad thai, leaving the rest to Louis who eats like a starved man. 

“Hey, no one’s gonna steal anything from you,” Harry says carefully. 

“I know, I know. Just god- I’ve been awake since 5 am and haven’t eaten anything. Today was truly awful,” he says after he swallows down his bite. 

“It’s fine. I have more if you want,” Harry offers, but Louis shakes his head. 

“No, this is plenty. Thank you Harry for… this . It’s hard to be alone after these kinds of days,” Louis says sincerely and Harry gives him a warm smile. 

“That’s what good neighbours are for, right?” He asks and Louis rolls his eyes teasingly.

“Sure.” 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

It’s 3 am and Harry can’t sleep. He thought it would be better after his time with Niall and Zayn. He added their hoodies into his nest. He’s lying in his nest right now, surrounded by Niall’s and Zayn’s scents. And he’s awake, sweaty and breathing harshly because he had a nightmare that he, once again, can’t recall. He isn’t sure whether it’s good or bad that he never remembers what exactly happens in those dreams. He more so remembers the feelings, the anxiety, the panic, and the fear. 

Harry’s throat feels dry so he gets up and goes into his kitchen, filling a glass of water and then stepping outside in hopes that the air will have a cooling effect on his hot skin. 

He is startled when he sees Louis standing there, wearing just a pair of joggers and a cap, his torso left bare, though it’s dark enough that Harry can only see the outline of his body and the red cherry glow of his cigarette.

“Can’t sleep?” Louis asks, voice sounding hoarse and Harry wonders if he ever went inside after he left to go to bed. From the looks of it, he didn’t. 

“I did. Just woke up again and needed some fresh air. You?” 

“No. Minds running wild. I never even tried.” Louis chuckles dryly.

“You’ve been awake since 5 am, that's almost 22 hours Louis. You need to sleep.” 

“I know. I just- I can’t,” he says, rubbing his free hand over his face. 

“Can I do anything to help?” He asks, glad for the distraction from his own state. 

“No, but thank you, love,” he says, looking at Harry, and in that second, the clouds lift from the moon, revealing Louis' red rimmed eyes. 

“Oh Lou,” Harry mumbles but Louis shakes his head and looks down. 

“It’s fine, it’s- I swear it’s fine. Well, it’s not fine but I am. I’m fine,” Louis says, closing his hand into a fist. It sounds like he’s trying to convince himself more than that he actually believes the words. 

“It’s okay if you’re not though, you know that right?” Harry asks. “It’s- It’s your job to care and I think it’d be way more concerning if you didn’t, if everything just left you cold. It’s good to care, to be passionate, to fight for those who can’t fight on their own. You’re doing a good thing, and it’s okay if it sometimes overwhelms you.” 

“It’s- it’s a pup you know, barely… barely 4 years old. It’s a pup. ” Louis sniffs and Harry steps forward until he’s standing at the railing that separates their balconies. 

“It’s so fucking hard sometimes, Harry. So unfair and hard.” 

“I’m sorry,” he mumbles, laying a hand on Louis' bare arm, right on top of his stag tattoo. His skin is warm and soft where Harry is touching him. His scent is distressed, unsettling Harry's omega. He wants to help, wants to turn the scent of burned tea back to its normal, lovely state, wants the cinnamon back that’s completely missing. His omega is screaming at him to just scent the alpha to try to soothe him, but Harry can’t.

They stand like that for what feels like forever, Louis silently crying until he lets out a bitter laugh. 

“I can smell your scent turning sour, you know? I can- I know it’s not proper, but I know I’m causing you distress right now and that’s actually making things worse for me because it makes me feel even more like a failure.” 

“I’m sorry,” Harry whispers and removes his hand from Louis' arm. Louis shakes his head. 

“Not your fault… It’s me.” 

“We should go to sleep. Especially you,” Harry says and Louis nods. 

“Yeah, you’re right.” He grabs another cigarette and Harry looks at him. 

“I’ll go after this, I promise,” he mumbles around the stick and Harry sighs. 

“I’m here if you need anything,” he says and Louis nods with an appreciative smile. 

“Thank you,” he says, watching Harry leave. 

Harry falls into his nest, but he ends up tossing and turning for the rest of the night, no matter how hard he tries, sleep doesn’t come to him again. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Harry is one of the first to arrive at the bar, sitting down in a booth. He mindlessly checks out the menu while he waits for his friends to arrive. He hasn’t seen them in a little over the week, since that awful date, and while he’s still pissed at River, there’s only so many times that Harry can say no to his friends. 

“Oh, hey, H. How are you?” River asks and Harry rolls his eyes because of course the person Harry wants to avoid most is the person who arrives first.

“What, you're still not talking to me?” He laughs, sliding into the booth next to him when Harry doesn’t answer. 

“Of course I'm still mad at you,” he says, scooting a bit to the side to avoid River scent being all over him The smell of peppermint is already too strong in Harry’s nose. 

“Oh, come on. It was hardly my fault that the guy was an ass.” 

“It’s not just about that,” Harry sighs and looks to the alpha.

“Well what is it then? You’re being bratty for no fucking reason!” Rivers grumbles, making Harry cower in on himself. 

“Hey guys.” Theo comes, followed by Cato and Dayaa, stopping Harry from answering. 

“Hey man,” River responds. Harry gives him a small, tense smile. Theo looks at him questioningly, sliding in on Harry’s other side so that he’s sandwiched by the two alphas. 

“How did that date go?” He asks, making River chuckle and Harry look down. 

“Harry completely freaked out guys. Should’ve seen it, he made a whole scene. It was kinda embarrassing, I’m not gonna lie. Had to apologise to my coworker after Harry stomped off. Think he owes me something now, doesn't he?” River says before Harry can even open his mouth. 

“The guy was a prick,” he adds meekly and Cato shakes his head. 

“Nah H, you always do this when you meet an alpha that’s secure in his gender. They intimidate you, make you feel uneasy because they know what they want and they know how to get it and you don’t know how to handle that. You need to just let it happen for once. Stop being so uptight and let your omega take over a bit.” 

Harry frowns at Cato. 

“I’m just saying, listen I’ve got this mate, he’s an alpha and he’s nice, rich too. He will take you to all these fancy places and stuff. He’s a bit older but he looks good for his age. Go out with him and let him court you, let him take care of you. Try to act like an omega is supposed to act for once.” 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Harry isn’t sure how it happened, but a week later he’s wearing a velvet green dress and a black bow around his neck to hide his scent glands and is being picked up by a chauffeur who will be driving him to an exclusive french restaurant. 

He’s never heard of it before, only Googled it and choked on air when he saw how expensive the items on the menu were. 

He’s grateful for the champagne he finds in the car and instead of wondering why anyone has a compartment holding cooled champagne in the first plane, he focuses on the fact that it’s there and that it helps loosen Harry up a bit. 

Maybe his friends are right, maybe he is the problem. 

Harry waits patiently for the door to be opened and accepts the hand that’s being offered to him, stepping out of the car. 

“Mr Davenport will wait inside for you,” the beta driver says, closing the door after Harry. 

“Alright, thank you,” Harry says with a smile. The chauffeur nods at him and stands next to the driver's door, watching Harry walk up the few stairs leading to the entrance of the restaurant. 

The door is being opened for Harry and he thanks the woman who does so. 

“Hello, welcome to Étoilebrume , how can I help you?” Another person asks and Harry smiles at the man. 

“I’m meeting with Mr Davenport,” he says. The man looks into his book of reservations before he nods. 

“Of course, please follow me,” he says after a moment. Harry follows him quietly as they walk past tables filled with elegantly dressed people, chatting quietly over glasses of wine and expensive meals. 

Harry is confused when the waiter doesn’t stop at any of the open tables, but instead leads him through another hallway. 

“Mr Davenport has requested for you two to have a private room,” he explains when he stops at a closed door. 

“Oh,” Harry breathes out and the waiter gives him a smile. 

“He’s already waiting for you,” he says with a nod before walking away again. 

“Right,” Harry whispers. For a moment, he contemplates just turning around and leaving. All his alarm bells are ringing at the fact he’s going to spend time with an alpha he’s never met before alone in a room, secluded from everyone else. 

He closes his eyes before carefully knocking on the door and opening it. 

Mr Davenport, or Cillian as Cato had called him, is a strikingly good looking man, wearing an obviously expensive suit that’s tailored to him. It’s grey, with a white button down beneath it where he left the top few buttons open, exposing his chest. 

His hair is combed back and black with some grey streaks. He has brown eyes and is taller than Harry. The strong scent of caramel and whiskey in the air must belong to him. 

He’s standing, nursing a glass of whiskey and looking Harry up and down before he smiles. 

“Cato wasn’t lying when he said you’re a pretty thing,” he says, walking up to Harry. 

“Thank you,” he mumbles, accepting the hug. 

“And you smell sweet too. Milk and… Honey,” he whispers, letting one finger stroke over the ribbon around Harry’s neck. Harry swallows, feeling uneasy in the presence of the alpha. 

“Tell me about yourself Harry,” he says, stepping out of Harry’s vicinity to sit down at the round table in the middle of the room. He makes a gesture with his hand, indicating for Harry to sit down as well. 

Harry carefully walks up to the table and sits, licking his lips. “Well, what do you want to know?” He asks, making the alpha chuckle. 

“Cute. What do you do for work?”

“I work in marketing,” he answers vaguely, still recalling the last time he told an alpha about his job. The dismissive tone, the condescending questions—Stephen’s words still echo in his head. 'Omega stuff? Candles and nesting shit?' Harry presses his lips together at the memory. He’d held back then, knowing Stephen wouldn’t understand, just like many alphas before him.

“Do you like your work?” He asks and Harry nods. 

“I do, I love it. What do you do? Cato didn’t tell me much.” 

“I own things,” he replies. It’s all he says before a waiter comes in carrying a tray. 

“I already ordered if that’s alright?” He asks and Harry gives a mix between a shrug and a nod. 

“Sir,” the waiter greets, only addressing Cillian. He pours some red wine into a glass, handing it to Cillian who swirls it and tastes it before he nods. 

“That’s fine,” he says and the waiter nods, filling up his glass before he fills up another glass that he places in front of Harry. 

“Thank you,” he mumbles, feeling completely out of place. 

“First course is ready to be served if that’s alright, Sir?” The waiter asks and Cillian nods. 

“You can leave,” he says and the waiter nods before leaving the room. 

“This is all very… extravagant,” Harry admits and Cillian hums. 

“Welcome to my world dear. Get used to it, this could be yours too.” 

Harry bites his lip and looks down bashfully. He wants to leave, but something inside of him wants to prove to his friends that he can play the part of the perfect little omega. So, he stays. Over the entirety of the five course meal he speaks only when spoken too, bats his lashes and blushes when complimented. He plays the role perfectly. 

Dessert is a plate with an assortment of things that they share, and Harry makes sure to only try little bites of each item and takes his time between bites. He giggles quietly, hiding it behind a hand and makes sure to hold eye contact. 

“What do you do in your free time, Harry?” Cillian asks once they're done with dinner and the plates have been cleared away. He gets up and leans against the table right next to Harry, looking down at him. It makes Harry nervous, his heavy alpha scent making him a bit dizzy. Everything’s too much and Cillian is too close. 

“Uhm.. I- I knit? Sometimes. I like to read too, and I go out with my friends. I cook a lot as well. Mundane things I suppose.” 

Cillian nods, eyes boring into Harry’s. It feels like he’s being spread open, his every move under surveillance.

“Why don’t we move into the lounge? Get to know each other better? Dinner always feels a bit formal doesn’t it?” 

“It does,” Harry agrees, his head screaming at him to say no, to say he has to leave. Anything . 

Cillian offers his hand and helps Harry stand up, his hand easily falling onto the small of Harry’s back. 

He leads them further down the hall, all the way to the end towards a big double door. Another waiter is standing there, who opens the door for them and Harry wonders if that’s his only job. 

Immediately upon entrance, the heavy smell of alpha and cigars hits Harry's nose, making him stumble backwards a bit. Cillian puts his other hand on Harry’s waist, guiding him forward. 

Harry swallows and looks around the room. He’s not the only omega, there are others too, dressed in short, revealing clothes. Some seem completely out of it, leaning against alphas who are smoking, their hands roaming over their bodies. 

“What… I don’t-“ Harry tries to turn but Cillians hands stop him. 

“It’s alright. As long as you’re with me, they’ll know not to touch,” he mumbles into Harry’s ear. Harry feels sick, like he'll either pass out or throw up. 

Cillian guides them deeper into the room, where they find a two-seater sofa flanked by two others, all arranged around a wooden table.

“Sit,” Cillian says and Harry follows his order. The alphas sitting on the other sofas all eye him like he’s fresh meat and they’re hungry wolves. 

Harry carefully pulls his dress down his thighs, regretting not wearing pants. 

Cillian sits down next to him, the heavy scent of whiskey invading Harry’s nose when he wraps his arm around Harry’s waist, pulling them flush together. 

The alpha ordered them something to drink, though what it is, Harry can’t recall. He just accepts the glass that’s handed to him and clinks it against Cillians. He doesn’t drink from it. 

Not long after that, a waitress, obviously an omega, in a short black dress comes with a tray, handing Cillian a cigar with a metal tong.

“Be a sweetheart and light it for me, will ya?” He asks Harry, who grabs the zippo lighter that’s also sitting on the tray with shaky hands. It’s golden, with some emblem engraved that Harry has trouble deciphering. He flips it open and lets his thumb glide over the glint wheel, once, twice, and a third time before a flame erupts.

“Good,” Cillian mumbles, letting his hand glide down Harry’s waist. Harry freezes when Cillians hand stops on his ass and squeezes it. It takes him two seconds, what feels like a lifetime to realise what just happened when he lets the lighter fall, not caring that it lands in Cillians lap before he’s up and running out of the lounge and down the hallway. He slams the door leading to the main room where people are still eating, probably unaware of what goes on not too far from them. Harry doesn’t even try to walk slowly, just keeps running with tunnel vision. He just wants to get out, his stomach feeling tight and his throat restricted. He’s pretty sure he runs into a waiter, hears the loud noise of glass shattering behind him, but Harry doesn’t look back. It’s only when he’s outside that he stops, hand supporting itself on a tree when he empties his stomach. 

He calls himself an Uber, thankful when it arrives only two minutes later, and gets in. Harry doesn’t even try to answer the few questions the driver asks in an attempt to make small talk, instead he presses his sweaty forehead against the cool window and closes his eyes, trying to get his rapid breathing to calm down. 

It’s a futile attempt, Harry barely feels any better when he arrives at his flat. He somehow manages to tip his Uber driver before he stumbles up the stairs and into his flat. He still feels restricted, still feels like there is not enough air in the room for him to fill his lungs. He tears the ribbon off of his throat and pulls off his dress, pretty sure he’s destroying it in the process but he can’t be bothered at the moment. He just needs to breathe . 

With everything off, Harry takes deep breaths, and lies on the cold floor as tears fall down his face. He wonders why him, why it’s always him ending up in these situations, why it’s him and not someone else, why every alpha is just using him, why he’s such a failure, such a bad omega, why he isn’t enough, why, every interaction tires him out, why he always feels like he’s close to dropping, why he can’t be normal . Harry has all these questions and no answers. 

He doesn’t know for how long he lies there. But, eventually he feels like he can breathe again. He gets up, removes his make up and puts on an oversized t-shirt that he’s pretty sure belonged to Niall at some point and he just never returned it, his scent long vanished. He considers calling them but then he remembers what Zayn told him about his sleeping issues and on the off chance he is sleeping right now, Harry doesn’t want to bother them. They need all the rest they can get, since they have only 4 months left before their pup is born and Harry doesn’t want to put any unnecessary weight on them. 

He can take care of himself. 

He grabs his blanket and a stuffie from the nest and makes his way outside. The air is cool, but Harry knows he won’t be able to sleep anyway. At this point, he shouldn’t be surprised anymore by running into Louis on the balcony at odd hours, but his mind feels like it’s all over the place, so he's startled by seeing Louis' frame standing there in the dark. 

“I saw you come in and I heard you crying and you sounded real panicked. I almost came over but i also didn’t want to make it worse because I don’t know how you would’ve reacted to me, but I would have come over after two hours, but then the lights turned on after some time and I figured you were at least moving and I thought maybe you’d come outside so I just waited here. To make sure you're okay. Which clearly you’re not.” 

“No,” Harry whispers, not sure what else he’s supposed to say. There are still tears running down his cheeks, so really there is not even a point in trying to hide the truth. “You waited for me?” Harry sniffs and Louis shrugs.

“Yeah, ‘course I did,” he states. And it sounds so simple, like he’s talking about the weather, like the fact the sky is blue and the grass is green and birds can fly. Of course he waited. 

“Get comfy, I’ll be back in a minute. Wait here yeah?” He asks, hopping down off the railing and Harry nods. He sits down on the sofa, the blanket wrapped around him and his legs pulled to his chest, his stuffed toy held close to him. 

Five minutes later, Louis comes out with a cup and a bowl, looking at Harry and then back to his items. 

“Probably shouldn’t have told you to get comfy and then make you stand up again,” he mutters. “I made you soup and tea,” he adds and a new wave of tears overwhelms Harry as he gets up. 

“Really?” He croaks out, voice scratchy from the crying.  

“Yeah, I figured you needed something… warm,” he mumbles and Harry sniffs. 

“Thank you,” he whispers, accepting the bowl and the cup and sitting back down. It’s chamomile tea and noodle soup and Harry eats it quietly while Louis smokes, his own cup next to him. 

“I was on a date,” Harry mumbles eventually. Louis hasn’t asked and Harry’s pretty sure he wouldn’t have asked but he feels like he owes it to Louis to give him some sort of explanation. He feels like Louis may be the only person who will just listen and not talk over him and belittle him for being an omega. 

“And a friend of mine had set it up. He told me it’d be better after the last one, that the guy was older but nice. And he said some stupid things about me not being a good omega? And I wanted to prove that I can be a stereotypically good omega, so I agreed. The guy had me picked up by a chauffeur and invited me to this insanely expensive restaurant. He had a whole private room reserved for us and of course I saw all the red flags. But I can be stubborn… So, I behaved like society expects an omega to behave, you know? I- I was good . And then, when dinner was over, we went into this weird back room that was full with alphas smoking cigars and I wanted to leave but he stopped me. I let myself be led to this stupid sofa and sat down and he - it’s embarrassing and you do not get to judge me - ge asked me to light his cigar and there were all these omegas with the alphas, looking like arm candy, like trophies. I mean some of them seemed so dazed. But I did as he asked and when his hand slipped down my back to my… y’know… I freaked and dropped the lighter- what if I burned him?!- And I ran. I ran and threw up and called a car and panicked. I think I was close to dropping.  And now I’m here. God this is- this is so humiliating.”

“It’s not Harry. It's not your fault. You were put in a difficult situation, and you did the best you could. I get that you’re feeling embarrassed and humiliated, but please know that you're not to blame for what happened. You managed to leave the situation before it got worse, you stood up for yourself. And if anyone’s to blame, then it’s that friend of yours. But not you.” 

“Doesn’t feel like it,” Harry whispers, taking a sip from his tea. 

“I know,” Louis says, a comforting smile on his face. “Your vulnerability was abused and I know you think all of the blame is to be put on you for going in the first place, for not saying no, but you also didn’t say yes. You never gave consent to him touching you. Just because you didn’t say no doesn’t give him the right to touch you in any way you don’t agree with being touched. It’s not your fault. And maybe you don’t understand that now, but you will. And if not, I'm always here to listen or remind you.” 

“Thank you, Louis. Thank you for- for everything I suppose,” he mumbles and Louis shrugs. 

“It’s nothing,” he says and Harry shakes his head. 

“It’s not nothing and you know it.”

“Drink your tea and let’s try to think some happy thoughts, yeah?” 

“I don’t know if I can,” Harry whispers and Louis shakes his head. 

“You can. Come on. What’s your favourite thing to do in winter?”

Harry sighs and looks away. This whole thing is stupid and silly. 

“Come on, darling, indulge me.” 

Harry looks back to Louis. The darling rolled off the alpha’s tongue so gently, his expression curious and open, expecting in a way that Harry would feel bad not indulging him even though he knows Louis is doing this more for Harry than himself. 

“I like to… take walks in the snow. I like to bake and drink hot chocolate and watch all of my favourite Christmas movies, no matter how cheesy they are,” Harry says eventually and Louis grins at him. 

“I like ice skating and mulled wine and Christmas Eve dinner,” he says and Harry can’t help but smile at that. 

“I like fairy lights and the days between Christmas and New Year’s Eve. There is this quietness lingering in the air that’s eerie in a comforting way. I can’t really describe it but I love it.”

“I know what you mean,” Louis says. “I love seeing my family.”

“Yeah,” Harry agrees. 

“Happy thoughts. Happy days.” Louis smiles. 

Harry can’t believe it actually helped, made him feel a bit lighter, a bit less stressed and anxious. 

“Happy thoughts,” Harry says. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Harry spends his weekend crocheting. He ignores any and all of his friends messages, his phone turned on to do not disturb, with the only people able to get through being Niall and Zayn. So, he crochets and watches New Girl all day to help calm himself down and it helps. Crocheting always helps. 

He crochets in bed when he wakes up and drinks his morning tea, crochets on his sofa while watching New Girl, and crochets outside while talking to Louis about his job. It’s interesting and Harry soaks up his stories like a sponge. Louis keeps only telling the good stories and Harry isn’t sure whether Louis keeps the bad ones from Harry to protect him, or if he doesn’t tell them because he doesn’t want to think about them either. Harry crochets and crochets and crochets until, by Sunday night, he’s finished a whole granny square blanket. 

It’s cute, with one set of squares being an earthy orange with a warm yellow sun inside, another off-white with a yellow star inside, and the third square dark green with a crescent moon inside. It’s cute and he’s proud of it and once he’s done he cries. He cries on his sofa until he falls asleep, kept warm by the blanket covering his body. 

He wakes up somewhere between 2 and 3 am and groggily stumbles into his bedroom, taking the blanket with him, where he immediately falls asleep again, his bones aching. He’s glad that for the rest of his night he sleeps until he’s awoken by his alarm way too early for how tired he feels. 

He gets ready for work, feeling like he can barely keep his eyes open. He works for half the day and barely gets anything done, so Harry clocks out and goes outside with his new blanket to lie down and sleep. 

When he wakes up the next time, Harry has the faintest scent of cinnamon and tea mixed with smoke in his nose though, but when he looks to Louis' side of the balcony, he can’t see the alpha. 

He sits up and rubs his eyes as he lets out a yawn. He still feels tired and he’s considering just laying down again or going inside to his bed, until he hears the loud noise of a door slamming shut and screaming coming from Louis flat. 

It sounds angry, and from the way the voices carry out pretty clearly, Harry guesses Louis' balcony door is still open. 

“You told me it’d get better, you fucking promised me and it doesn’t. You’re a liar, a fucking liar and I hate you,” a voice, unknown to Harry, screams. There’s a growl latched onto it though that lets Harry know that this is an alpha, an alpha that’s obviously mad and agitated. Harry swallows. 

“I know, I know and I swear it will. It’ll just… It’ll be hard still for a while but it will get better, okay? It will. You just have to believe in yourself.” Louis' voice comes through calm and reasonable and it relaxes Harry. 

“I’m done believing in myself, I'm done trying. I’m fucking done with you,” the stranger's voice growls, making Harry squirm as it unsettles his omega. The next thing he knows, a maybe 16 year old boy is standing on Louis balcony, fumbling with his hands in his pockets until he pulls out a pack of cigarettes. 

While he knows it’s rude, Harry can’t help but stare. He has red hair, his style could definitely be described as punk with painted black nails and a sleeve of tattoos. There are piercings adorning his face, two in his left eyebrow and one in his lip and his eyes are smudged by black liner. Louis comes out a moment later, grabbing the cigarette out of the boy's mouth and snapping it in half.

“The fuck?!” He asks at the same moment Louis says “get inside.” 

“I don’t want to,” he says, grabbing another cigarette and sticking it between his lips. Louis grabs it but the boy dodges his right hand, which just leads to Louis using his left hand to grab the cigarette and breaking it too. 

“I can do this all day,” he says, making the boy growl profanities at Louis. Harry knows he should probably leave but the constant alpha voice laced growling has Harry frozen in place.

The boy grabs another cigarette, and once again, Louis grabs it from him. 

“I fucking hate you.” 

“So you’ve been saying. Now go back inside.” Louis says, voice remaining calm.

The boy turns around and away from Louis, making eye contact with Harry. 

“The fuck you’re looking at, this isn’t some fucking tv show for you to enjoy-“

“Tio, enough,” Louis says, his own voice edged with a growl now but the boy, Tio, ignores him. 

“No, I don’t want him to look at me. Stop looking at me and leave!” He growls, alpha voice in full effect and Harry can’t do anything but follow the order, a whine leaving his mouth. 

He looks at Louis, can see him talking to Tio with an angry expression, but can’t hear it as he walks inside, feeling scared as his omega just takes over his body. He doesn’t stop until he reaches his nest, only then realising he’s left his blanket outside, but he physically can’t go back. Harry curls up in his nest, scared, as tears roll down his cheeks. 

“Harry,” Louis' voice comes suddenly from his bedroom doorway. Harry sniffs and peeks around the corner that hides his nest. Louis is crouching there, expression worried. Harry has no idea how he got here but he doesn’t find it in himself to ask.  

“Love, I'm so sorry. I- God, I could rip his head off he’s- he presented not too long ago which isn’t an excuse but… it’s a long story. But. Fuck H, I’m so fucking sorry. I can explain it to you, just not right now because I know you're not in the right headspace but- Fuck Harry, I know you’re close to dropping right now and you’re probably scared and mad and-” 

“Louis?” Harry interrupts the rambling alpha, his voice shaky as he hides back in his nest. 

“Yeah love?” Louis asks gently on a breath and Harry closes his eyes. 

“Please leave me alone.” 

“I… I can help you though, please let me help.” 

“I don’t want your help, I want to be alone. I’m fine, I just need to sleep.”

It's quiet for a while before Harry hears the softest “ alright ,” and then some shuffling before his front door falls closed. 

Harry doesn't drop, but it's close. 

The near drop is enough for him to hide out in his flat for the next week or so. He crochets another blanket, and then he gets bored of blankets, so he tries making a cardigan and it keeps him occupied. He also makes stuffed animals, more than he really needs, so he puts them in a basket to either sell or donate later. It's safe to say he doesn't get much sleep with all the crocheting he’s doing. And Harry feels bored quickly without his friends and without Louis, so he scrolls through his phone, trying to find something new. 

He ends up with a long list of things he wants to try, so many, that Harry can't decide what he wants to start, especially because some of the things like candle making, require going to a class, less he wants to drop 100 pounds on wax and silicon forms. With a cup of tea and New Girl playing on the tv, Harry spends another evening crafting, putting all of the things he wants to do on a list and using more glitter and stickers than probably necessary to make it look cute before he sticks it to his fridge. 

Hiding only works so long though, because eventually Harry has to leave his flat to buy groceries. So, on Friday evening after he’s clocked out of work, Harry grabs his grocery shopping bags and steps out of his flat. Rationally, Harry knows that none of the things that happened were Louis’ fault but he can’t help but be a bit hesitant regarding the alpha now. Once Harry is ready, he’ll let Louis explain why there was a young, rage filled alpha in his flat using his voice on Harry, but as of now the thought alone is enough to drain all colour from his face and make his stomach turn. 

Harry loves grocery shopping, though he regrets not coming earlier because as it is, grocery stores on Friday nights are overfilled and it leaves Harry anxious. Nevertheless, he tries to block out all the scents and bodies around him, and instead focuses on his fruits and vegetables, taking his time picking them out. He grabs strawberries and blueberries and mangos and kiwis and bananas before he moves on to the vegetables. He picks out cucumbers and zucchinis and tomatoes and everything else he might need. He moves on, working through his shopping list that he’s crafted in his head until he ends up in the aisle with all the treats. Harry takes his time picking out chocolate and chips and biscuits. 

“Harry?” A familiar voice asks and Harry turns to the familiar voice. Louis is standing there, dressed in blue jeans and a simple black t-shirt with a black cap. 

“Oh, hey Louis,” Harry says, holding onto his shopping cart tighter. 

“How… How are you? I was worried.” Concern is written all over Louis face and he gives a small smile. 

“I'm fine, promise,” he says and Louis looks down.  

“You’re not. And it’s all my fault. I- this is strange now. But I wanted to cook for you tonight because I've not seen you in a week and I just wanted to make sure you were somewhat alive but you are- which is great. I’m relieved.”

“You wanted to cook for me tonight?” Harry asks, still hung up by those words and Louis shrugs nonchalantly, though there is a blush on his cheeks. 

“Yeah? Make sure you’re eating enough and- I mean I wouldn’t have come over, just probably knocked on your day and handed it to you. Lasagna. Veggie lasagna, I wasn’t sure whether you eat meat or not. And I'm actually trying to cut it out of my diet so I figured going with no meat would be the safest bet. But now, thinking about it, it's silly and stupid and pushy. I’ll leave you to it now. I guess I’ll see you?” Louis says with an awkward chuckle and starts to walk away. 

“We could maybe… eat together on the balcony? I can make some dessert?” Harry asks, looking at Louis who turns around with a bright grin on his face and an eager nod. 

"Yes! Yes that- I’d love that. And we can talk- or not, whatever you’re comfortable with of course.”

“Louis?”

“Yeah?”

“Calm down.” Harry smiles at him and the alpha nods, biting his bottom lip. 

“Right, yeah. I’m just- Seven, what do you think about seven?”

“Seven works for me.” Harry smiles and Louis grins before he’s off. 

Harry throws in some more sweets and then finishes the rest of his grocery shopping. He doesn’t run into Louis again, weirdly enough, given that the store isn’t very big. As soon as he’s home, after being caught by Mrs Bakshi who wouldn’t stop talking about her dog, Harry starts on making brownies.

Albeit it being a bit of a basic dessert, it’s also something classic that everyone loves and Harry will top it off with some vanilla ice cream and fruit to make it look more presentable. New Girl is playing while Harry bakes and he finds himself wondering what Louis is doing while he cooks.

Once the brownies are in the oven, with the timer set, Harry takes a quick shower and gets in some comfy clothes before he starts on cutting up all the fruit.. mainly strawberries and some blueberries. A glance at the clock tells him he has ten minutes left before it strikes seven pm, so Harry grabs the blanket that he made himself and goes outside. Louis must have kept his balcony door open because immediately upon walking outside Harry is met by the most delicious smell. 

He settles on his little sofa and answers Niall’s texts that he’s gotten, asking him if he and Zayn can come over for brunch on Sunday. Harry of course accepts and already knows he’ll have to go grocery shopping again when Niall texts him that he doesn’t have to worry about the food. Harry answers a simple ‘alright’ before Louis steps out, two plates in his hands. 

“This smells absolutely delicious,” Harry praises, grabbing his plate from Louis before he settles down again. Somehow, amidst all the chaos, August turned into September and the nights are starting to cool down enough for Harry and Louis to be wearing sweaters. 

“I hope you’ll like it. There’s enough left for second or third servings so dig in! I’ll just quickly grab myself something to drink, do you want anything?” 

“What’re you having?” Harry asks. 

“Uhm a glass of wine, if that’s okay for you?”

“Of course, Louis. I’d like one too then.”

“You sure?” Louis asks and Harry nods, a happy smile on his face because the alpha is being so considerate. 

Louis disappears for a couple moments before he steps back outside with a bottle of red and two wine glasses. 

He pours them each a glass and they let it clink together to cheers. 

Harry watches Louis jump on the railing again before he grabs his plate. 

“You’re not eating like that, are you?” He asks and Louis looks at him, fork lifted halfway to his mouth. 

“It’s the only way I can see you,” Louis explains. 

Harry frowns.“You could uhm… You could come over here and sit in the arm chair,” he offers, selfishly keeping the sofa to himself. He can’t be blamed though, for wanting his space, and he’s sure Louis understands as he accepts the silent boundary Harry set. 

“You sure?” He asks nonetheless, studying Harry’s face. He nods with a soft smile. 

“Yeah,” he says. 

“Okay then. Can you hold these please,” Louis asks, holding out his plate and glass. Harry puts his own plate to the side and gets up to take his things, setting them down on the small coffee table. 

“I’ll just let you… in,” Harry says, right before Louis jumps over the balconies. “Are you out of your mind?!” He shrieks, making Louis chuckle. 

“Is this how you got here last time?” Harry asks, having wondered how Louis got into his flat the other day and Louis nods. 

“Don’t ever do that again, you hear me?! It is dangerous.”

“It’s really not, but I won’t do it again, it just is way quicker this way.” Harry only stares at him while he sits back down. “I promise I'll never do it again,” the alpha says with a small, teasing eye roll. 

“You better not.” Harry pouts. 

Harry is not surprised that the lasagna tastes good, given how delicious it already smelled, he is however surprised how incredibly good it tastes. 

“This is the best thing I’ve ever eaten,” he says, halfway through his second serving and Louis gives him a happy smile.

“Good, I'm glad,” Louis smiles, almost done with his own second serving.

It’s over dessert that Louis starts the conversation over what happened with the unknown alpha. 

“Tio is an orphan. He's lived on the street for most of his life and I've been on his case since I started working as a social worker. He’s- he’s not easy, but he's a good lad. And he presented not too long ago. For some people it's hard, you know, to handle all these emotions and new feelings. It's intense. He was mad, mad at me because he relapsed and we were arguing about him going back to rehab. He’s been before and he's not the biggest fan of it, even if it did help him. But he stopped going to therapy after he presented and now has relapsed, so I took him to mine for a night and the symptoms of withdrawal put him on edge and lash out, which, paired with your scent that he probably could smell… His alpha took over. It's not an excuse, but it's an explanation and I swear he felt bad after. I took him back to the clinic the day it happened and he was willing to go. He freaked out afterwards, he absolutely panicked. Your scent was full of fear and he obviously picked up on that too and he was so scared he hurt you. I’m not saying he’s the victim, and I’m not trying to justify it, but I think it gave him a wake up call. I’m just sorry it was you who had to be at the receiving end of it. Your scent was full of anxiety and the next second it turned overwhelmingly sweet. I was sure you’d drop and I was scared to leave you alone. But he wants to apologise, Harry. He’s so deeply sorry. Of course you don’t ever have to talk to him again if that makes you feel unsafe in any way, but I just wanted you to know.” 

Harry can’t help but blush at the way Louis talks about his scent. It’s not really proper, you’re not really supposed to talk about scents directly except to maybe your mate, but he also understands why Louis is doing it now. He ponders over the words. He knows that usually, he shouldn’t be that affected by a freshly presented alpha’s voice. they’re not as strong, not as effective, and yet, it had Harry submitting without a second thought. He knows it was not Louis' fault. And he can’t help but admire Louis for the work he’s doing. He’s not mad at Louis. He was scared, but he also felt betrayed; betrayed by himself for giving up without a fight, that he was weak enough to be so affected by the voice that he almost dropped. 

It says a lot about Harry, about the state of his body, but Harry is not willing to accept that something might be wrong with him or his omega. He wants to think that the constant fatigue and aching limbs and headaches are just that and not symptoms of something bigger,  something worse. 

“It took me off guard… It was…. You don’t expect something to happen to you in your own home, you know? I deal with cocky alphas all the time when I’m out and it’s tiring and gives me anxiety. But this flat, it’s my home, you know? I’ve got my nest here and all my things and it’s the one place where I can just be and he took that from me. And I- I was so scared Louis,” Harry breathes out, allowing the feelings to wash over him for the first time and it makes his eyes tear up. 

“I’m so sorry, love,” Louis mumbles softly and Harry gives him a weak smile.  

“I'll be fine though, I always am.” 

“It’s okay if you’re not,” Louis says. “You’re allowed to feel whatever feelings you have about this. You’re allowed to be mad and scared or whatever else you’re feeling. You’re entitled to those and no one can tell you you’re wrong for what you’re feeling.” 

Harry looks down, the words feeling personal and hard to handle. He knows Louis is right, technically, but it's always easier said than done. Harry wishes he could just move on from the situation, wishes he wouldn’t be as affected by it, but alas he is, and he’s not yet ready to receive a personal apology from the young alpha. He will allow it one day, for both their peace of minds, but today is not the day. 

“Can we do the thing again?” Harry asks and Louis cocks his head to the side questioningly. 

“What thing?” He asks softly as Harry puts his empty plate to the side to pull his legs to his chest. 

“The happy thoughts thing,” he mumbles, resting his chin on his legs. He’s scared Louis doesn’t even know what he means, and feels embarrassed that he brought it up in the first place. 

“Of course.” Louis nods with a soft smile, putting his own plate to the side and Harry breathes out a sigh of relief. 

“Can you start?” he asks timidly and Louis hums. 

“I like it when it’s really hot out and I’m standing at the beach and the breeze is blowing little drops of water on my skin,” he starts. “I like it when I eat ice cream at the pool and get it all over me but it doesn’t matter because a few moments later I'll jump in the pool and it’ll all wash away. I love how the sun makes me feel warm.” His voice is quiet and raspy, calming Harry down. He closes his eyes, imagines all these things Louis is describing and he can’t help but smile. 

“I like butterflies, I like drinking iced tea, and I really like sitting in the shadow of a tree, reading or crocheting,” Harry continues. 

“I like driving with all the windows down and music playing and I like when it’s been hot for so long and it finally rains. Happy thoughts?” 

“Happy thoughts.” 

“Good, keep them close for whenever you need them.” Louis smiles. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

The next day, Louis' niece and nephew are there again. Harry can hear them all giggling through the wall between their flats over the sound of his New Girl Marathon. He’s been getting through the episodes way too quickly and he’s scared he’ll restart the show immediately after finishing it. Louis' own chuckle breaks through every now and then, making Harry smile. 

It’s around noon, after Harry wakes up from a nap, that Harry’s eyes land on the basket with all his crocheting supplies, including all of the stuffed animals he’s made. Struck by an idea, Harry walks over to the basket and sits down in front of it. Gently, one by one, he plucks out all the little animals he made and lines them up next to him. There are little frogs and cows, ducks in different colours and turtles with different coloured shells. His favourite is definitely the axolotl, and selfish as it may be, Harry sits it down in his lap to keep for himself. 

He spends probably thirty minutes picking out two of the toys, not wanting to pick the wrong ones. In the end, Harry has chosen a little cow with sage green spots and a turtle with a strawberry inspired shell. He puts them both into a little wicker basket and attaches a note to it. 

To Evie and Lius,

I hope you’ll like them 

Harry xx

Smiling, Harry quietly slips out of his flat and places the basket in front of Louis' door before he goes back inside. He stands at his door for a good five minutes, looking through the little peep hole to wait and watch what happens until he realises how irrational that is and how low the chances are that Louis will open his door right now. 

So, Harry returns back to his living area and puts all of the leftover stuffed animals back in the basket, only keeping the axolotl as he slumps back into his couch to get back to his New Girl marathon.

Chapter Text

Harry wakes up to Zayn curled around him, laying on his side, propped up by his arm as he gently plays with Harry’s hair. He hums happily, nuzzling closer to his friend. 

“Wakey wakey,” Zayn whispers ever so gently and Harry knows he’ll make the best mum. “Ni is making brekkie for us,” he continues. “And the baby is really hungry so we should get up, love.” 

“Yeah,” Harry breathes out, curling himself together. He's so tired and so comfy, he doesn't ever want to move.

“Alright petal, up you get.” Zayn tugs one of his curls before he pulls away from Harry, making him whine. 

“I know love, come on. We can cuddle some more later okay?” Zayn promises and a moment later he’s hit by something soft. 

Harry puts on the white, Apollo Eleven shirt and light brown corduroy shorts slowly, not questioning Zayns choice of outfit for him, and instead is just glad to have one less decision to make. Zayn waits patiently for him, sitting on the bed while he gently strokes over his small belly. 

“Is my little sprout being nice to you?” He asks once he's dressed and a bit more awake and Zayn hums. The nickname came from Harry jokingly once when he claimed that since Zayn and Niall are always calling him petal they should stick to the theme and call the baby sprout since it is sprouting inside of Zayn. The couple decided not to know the sex until it's born, so sprout it is.

“Most of the time. Sprout likes to keep me awake when mummy’s tired, don't you little love?” Zayn asks, speaking to his belly and it makes Harry's inside melt. He's so beyond happy for his friends. 

“Ready?” Zayn asks him, a blush on his cheeks and Harry nods, giving him a soft smile. Zayn opens the door for them and Harry's stomach growls at the greasy smell meeting him. There’s eggs and what's probably bacon, cinnamon, and tea. 

“God I could eat for two,” Zayn groans and Harry looks back to him. 

“Zee, you literally are,” he says and Zayn nods. 

“Right, that's true. I am so glad because I am so hungry.” 

Harry shakes his head with a little laugh and walks through his hallway, the scent of cinnamon and tea getting stronger and Harry wonders if Niall is making waffles.  

“Oh right, before you freak out, we’ve invited Louis over,” Zayn says, just as they are entering the living room area. Harry is met by the sight of Niall and Louis standing at his stove and laughing. There's no sight of waffles and it dawns on Harry then where the smell of cinnamon and tea comes from. 

“Oh, hey petal.” Niall grins at him and Harry gives him a small smile. 

“Hi Ni,” he mumbles, eyes flicking to Louis unsurely. 

The alpha gives him a warm, reassuring smile but Harry can't mirror it. He's not sure how he feels about this. So far, Louis has been his . His neighbour, his one source of comfort that was just for him and that he didn’t have to share. Louis, who is one of the only people in the world where it doesn't feel like a task talking to him. 

“Hey Harry,” Louis says and Harry nods. 

“Hi,” he mumbles, looking at Zayn who gives him a happy smile. 

“We met Louis outside his door and started chatting about the flat and if there's still that awful creak in the door, and then we found the pictures and talked about his niece and nephew and well, we thought it'd be only nice to invite him over as well.” 

“Pictures?” Harry asks confusedly and Louis hums.

“Lius and Evie were persistent that they wanted to draw something for you as a thank you. You kinda made their day and stole my spot as the coolest person in the world.” 

Louis steps forward and grabs two sheets of papers from his counter, walking to Harry to hand them to him. 

Zayn walks over to Niall, fitting himself in his alpha’s arms as Harry looks at the pictures. There's a pink blob on one picture and something akin to a turtle with a pink and red shell on the other. They are signed by the two children. 

“Evie picked the cow and Lius the turtle. They're kinda obsessed with them now, would not let go of them ever since, and they asked to spend time with you, but don’t worry I told them that's not possible.” Louis grins before he takes a step forward. “I can leave, find an excuse like that I’ve got to work or something if this is making you uncomfortable. They kinda didn’t give me a chance to decline and before I knew it, I was here,“ Louis explains and Harry gives him a soft smile as he finds he doesn’t mind all that much that Louis is currently in his flat. 

“If you’re okay with it, then I am too,” he says and Louis gives him a blinding smile. 

“You two go sit down, Louis and I will take care of everything,” Niall says, gently shooing Zayn away but not without gently stroking his tummy once. 

“He acts like I'm some fine china and not just pregnant. I’m not allowed to do anything anymore,” Zayn says with a fond eye roll. 

“You’re carrying our pup, sorry for going a bit insane with it. Besides, you love it.”

“Hm, yeah I do.” Zayn grins, sitting down with Harry as he winks at him. 

“I get it though, it’s different for alphas. All we can think is “ must protect ,”” Louis chimes in, making them all turn to look at him. 

“Not that I’ve been with a pregnant partner before but my sister. She got pregnant and was alone and I spent a lot of time with her during that period, and while I knew that it wasn’t even my pup, I still felt overly protective over her. It’s got a lot to do with scents too. I can’t imagine what it might be like when it’s my actual mate,” Louis explains sheepishly, focusing on pouring orange juice from a bottle into a glass. 

“Exactly.” Niall grins. “It’s biology.” He wiggles his brows, making Louis blush and Harry and Zayn giggle. 

“I love being spoiled, but I'm also perfectly capable of preparing breakfast,” Zayn says with a shrug. 

Harry smiles, leaning his head against Zayn's shoulder, letting out a soft sigh. He’s still exhausted, a heavy weariness clinging to his bones, but the comforting scent of food wafting through the air eases it, if only a little. He closes his eyes for a second, taking in the comfort of it all.

“Since you’ve taken over Harry’s kitchen, can either of you darlings be so kind and also make him some coffee? I’m scared he’ll fall asleep again otherwise and he already was such a pain to get up in the first place.” 

“I wasn’t.” Harry pouts, fluttering his eyes open.

“No, you actually are quite adorable,” Zayn muses, making Harry smile happily. 

A couple minutes later, tattooed fingers are placing a cup of coffee in front of him and Harry smiles up at Louis. 

“Thank you,” he says, taking the cup between his hands and taking a deep breath from the steaming liquid. 

It doesn’t take much longer for them to put all the delicious food they prepared on the table and Harry wonders just how long Niall and Zayn and Louis had been in his flat before he was woken up because this is way more food than they could’ve prepared in the short time span Harry has been sitting with them. 

They dig in with music playing in the background while they hold light conversation that Harry mostly stays out of, partly because he still feels so tired and partly because he’s content watching his best friends and Louis, who possibly might count as Harry’s friend now too, get along so well. He tries to picture his other friends with them, wonders what it would be like if Cato, Dayaa and River or Theo were here now and the thought alone makes him shudder. They’re loud and brash, can’t go to social gatherings without drinking, and they would disrupt the quiet, beautiful morning Harry is having right now. 

They don’t really fit into his life that much. None of the things Harry is interested in are things they like and vice versa. And yet, Harry can’t break himself from them. 

“When’s the pup due?” Louis asks, a piece of vegan bacon between his thumb and forefinger. 

“We’re at 18 weeks,” Zayn explains and Niall hums with a soft smile. 

“Oh this must be so exciting for you two,” Louis says and they both nod. 

“What about you, d’you want some of your own?” Zayn asks and Louis is quick to nod. 

“Yeah, ‘ve always wanted them, but I think I’d like to foster first and adopt as well. I work with so many kids who are orphans and live in orphanages. They’re the sweetest and I’d love to give one or two a home one day.” It’s like every time Louis says something, Harry can’t help but be more in awe of him. 

“That’s honourable,” Niall says and Louis shrugs it off. 

“People who don’t have problems getting pregnant usually shy away from adopting but knowing what it’s like for these kids… It’s hard to turn away from that.” 

“Harry’s always dreamed of that, you know? Mate and pups and a white picket fence with a garden.” Harry blushes at those words he probably shyly voiced to Zayn on a drunken night and looks down with a small shrug. 

“I want a family of my own one day,” he mumbles, looking at Louis who nods in agreement. “If you’d ask my other friends they’d probably tell you that I should get started soon or else I'd be too old to find a suitable partner,” Harry tries for a joke but it falls flat on the others who give him all concerned looks. 

“You know that’s not true right?” Niall asks and Harry nods with a shrug. 

“Oh, come on H, you're barely 23, you’ve got all the time in the world,” Zayn says.“I hate these people,” he continues and Harry sees Louis open his mouth and he knows he’ll probably mention that date he had, so he subtly shakes his head. Niall and Zayn do not need to know about that. Louis gives Harry a worried look that goes unnoticed by his friends. 

“I’ve not been doing anything with them the past week or so. I’m trying, but it’s not easy. Theo’s nice,” Harry defends. 

“Theo wants to shag you,” Zayn corrects, making Harry furrow his brows. 

“No, he’s just a friend,” he says with the shake of his head and Zayn throws him a look that says really?!

“He is,” Harry insists, nibbling from his Franzbrötchen . 

“Does he know that?” Niall asks. 

“Of course he does. Don’t be silly.” 

“I’m sorry H, but he’s been making moves on you ever since he’s known you.” Niall shrugs and Zayn gives an agreeing nod. 

Harry looks away from his friends and looks outside instead, not liking where this conversation is going. He’d like to move on now, thank you very much. 

Louis thankfully leads the conversation back to other topics and soon they’re talking about how they want to spend the last couple of weeks before autumn takes over. And Harry truly cannot wait. He’s ready for everything fall and pumpkin spice. 

“I haven't gone strawberry picking yet. And I want to do that, just not alone,” Harry admits. “I only can on weekends though and it’s only open for another two weeks,” He says, looking at his friends. 

“I fear we'll be busy the next two weekends. We’re visiting Niall and I’s family, and we’re also getting started on the nursery. I’m sorry, love.”

“Oh, it’s fine,” Harry mumbles and he can’t believe that he’s actually jealous of the baby. It’s only for a split second, curses through him like an electric shock, but it stings and it’s there and it ruins Harry's entire mood. How dare he be that selfish? 

He tunes out the rest of the breakfast, too caught up in his own head. 

“Let’s go have a cuddle,” Niall says, once they’re finished with their food. He tugs Harry up and guides him to the sofa, Zayn having somehow convinced Niall to let him clean everything away with Louis.

Harry sighs but lets himself be pulled with Niall, curling up to him and sticking his nose in the alpha’s neck. It’s not really a surprise that he falls asleep like that. 

When he wakes up, he’s tucked in with his favourite blanket and there is a note lying next to him, telling him that they all left and that he should call them later. Harry knows the couple is worried. 

It’s 3 pm, so Harry grabs his crocheting bag and his blanket after he’s made himself some tea and goes outside. 

“Hello sleepyhead,” Louis greets him, sitting on the railing with a cigarette tucked between his lips that he takes out when he speaks. 

“Hi,” Harry mumbles. “Sorry for falling asleep, that’s not really nice of me as a host.” 

“Oh, I don't mind,” Louis says honestly as Harry settles down. 

“I’m usually not like that.” 

“It’s fine Harry, I swear.” Louis pulls out his cigarette. He watches Harry crochet quietly for a while but Harry doesn’t feel disturbed by it. It's rather a comfortable silence that settles over them.

“About that strawberry picking, I could go with you,“ Louis offers eventually, breaking the silence and Harry looks at him with surprise. 

“I mean, I don't want to push myself on you or force you or make you uncomfortable or anything really. I just understand not wanting to go alone and I could also just be there, like two steps away from you at all times and carry your basket for you, no pressure I just- You want to do it, and I wouldn’t mind going with you. Like at all. Everyone loves strawberries and I like spending time with you too… But you don’t have to!”

“You’d really come?” Harry asks unsure and Louis nods with a smile. 

“Course, why wouldn’t I?” 

“It's not really… It's not really a typical alpha thing, is it?” 

Louis regards him for a moment. “Is that something you care about?” He asks Harry. It doesn't sound judgy in any way and Harry shakes his head. 

“Of course not,” he mumbles. “I just know a lot of alphas do care about the way they are being  perceived.” 

“It's strawberry picking love, not running around naked in public.” Harry looks down and blushes at Louis' words. 

“So, can I come?” Louis asks and Harry looks up again. 

“I'd like that.” 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

On Friday night, Harry finds himself in a club with his friends. He found excuse after excuse as to why he couldn't go out with them, but there are only so many things he could say before they manage to guilt trip him into going out with them again. 

So, he's in some club in his black leather shorts and a see through beige blouse, sipping a sweet cocktail while his friends are all chatting around him. Despite it being a Wednesday, the club is packed and Harry feels like holding his nose, even though he knows it would be awfully rude. 

“Shots time!” Dayaa shouts excitedly, Cato holding a tray filled with shot glasses, salt, and tequila. Harry sighs. He already feels drunk and he has to wake up early tomorrow to work.

Harry can’t help but think about Zayn and Niall;s words, how they claimed that Theo has a thing for him and he has paid more attention to it tonight. Maybe they were right because suddenly, Theo is everywhere, always close by, always touching Harry in some way, even if it's just their thighs or shoulders being pressed together from how close they're sitting. 

Harry is still mad at Cato and RIver, Dayaa is loyal to a fault when it comes to Cato, and Lola and Flo are distracted with themselves, leaving only Theo left for Harry to talk to. And despite Harry showing minimal interest in him, Theo has been talking nonstop since Harry sat down next to him. 

“So, what do you say?” Theo asks just as Harry tunes back into the conversation. 

“Uhm… yeah- sorry, what did you say?” 

“You’ve been going on all these bad dates and I just wanted to show you a better time. Friday night, you and me, what do you think?” 

“Oh- uhm… I don’t- I don't know if that's such a good idea,” Harry mumbles, scooting a bit away from Theo. 

“Oh come on H, I’ve been waiting forever and you've opened your legs for all these alphas and I've been so nice to you the whole time. Cut me some slack, there's only so much of the nice guy act I can play. I have needs too, you know? And I think it's my turn now.” 

“I- Are you being serious right now?” Harry asks, shocked, looking at Theo who is staring back. 

“Everyone knows you're a whore, I just want to know if you're actually that good.” 

“I’ve not slept with any of these men I’ve been on dates with for all of you because they were all disgusting and so are you,” Harry spits, getting up. 

“Harry,” Theo growls, grabbing his underarm. Their friends turn to them, making Theo loosen his grip enough that Harry can slip himself out of it and run out of the club. It wasn’t his alpha voice, Harry knows that, but he’s still shaking and his heart is beating way too fast in his chest as he calls himself an Uber. 

The Uber stops right in front of his building and Harry just so manages to tip the driver before he gets out on shaky legs. He feels like they're going to give out under him any second. There are black spots dancing in front of his eyes and he feels sick and dizzy. Harry staggers up to the building, his breathing fast. 

Harry crashes against the wall, resting against it for a few moments as he searches through his bag blindly, looking for his keys. Once he's found them, Harry looks for the right one, getting frustrated when he drops them. He bends down, contemplating sitting down, at least until the dizziness subsides, but then he hears strange voices coming from down the street. Harry is aware of his vulnerable state, so he grabs his keys off the ground and looks through them for the right one. It takes him longer than it should with his hands shaky and his eyes still blurry. Harry lets out a frustrated whine when no matter which key he tries, none of them fit into the lock. 

The voices become louder, laughter accompanying them and Harry presses himself closer to the door, frantically trying key after key to no avail. Tears well up in his eyes as he lets his forehead drop against the door. 

“Harry?” Someone asks, the voices and the laughter quieting down. 

Harry turns with a sniff. Louis is standing there, surrounded by 5 other guys, though, where Louis looks worried, they seem to be full of curiosity. It's like his omega knows that Louis will help him, because another whine leaves his lips against his will, the sound high and distressed before he slumps against the door and tears start rolling down his cheeks. 

“Is he okay?” One of the guys asks and Harry can hear Louis tell him to shut up. Harry watches Louis step forward, gently taking the key out of his hand and, within seconds, picks the right key. 

“There you go, pup,” Louis mumbles gently, holding his hand out for Harry and pulling him up. 

“Lou- I…”

“It's okay, it's okay. I've got you.” He pushes the door open and lets Harry walk in first. 

“I'm- Lou,” Harry chokes out, looking at the alpha who nods. 

“Give me a moment,” he says and Harry can't help the involuntary whine that pushes past his lips when Louis leaves to go outside and Harry is just left standing there, anxiously staring at the door and hoping Louis will come back. He is not sure how much time exactly passes before Louis comes back, probably less than it feels like but judging by the relief cursing through Harry when Louis gets back, it might as well have been days. 

“Okay, let's get you home and take care of you, pup,” Louis says, placing a hand on the small of his back to guide him towards the staircase. The walk up the stairs is accompanied by Harry’s sniffling and Louis ever so gently shushing him, telling him it'll be alright. 

They arrive at their doors and Harry is thankful that Louis unlocks his door for him. 

“You’ve got a nest, don't you, love?” Louis asks and Harry nods. 

“I don't like it,” he cries and Louis gives him a sad look. 

“I'm sorry pup, do you want me to call Niall? I don’t- I don’t know what happened, but I don't want you to be alone right now.” 

“You're here,” Harry says and Louis nods. 

“I am, but you're close to dropping and I don't know if you really want me there or if it's just your omega needing comfort.” Harry furrows his brows, not understanding the difference. 

“Okay, how about we chat a bit outside?” 

“Happy thoughts?” Harry asks and Louis nods. 

“Yeah love, we can make some happy thoughts.” 

Louis situates him outside with a blanket and a cup of steaming hot lavender and lemon tea before he goes to his own flat. Harry didn't understand why that was necessary, he liked having Louis close, but the alpha insisted it’d be better before they do something they end up regretting in the morning. 

Louis comes back out after a few restless minutes with his own cup.  

“Wanna talk about what happened?” He asks and Harry gives a curd shake of his head. “Alright.” 

“Happy thoughts, please,” Harry whispers and Louis nods. 

“Alright, alright. Let's see, I like strawberries and I like strawberry picking. I like golden hour and I like when the sun paints the sky in the prettiest shade of pink and orange during sunset,” Louis says slowly, his voice raspy and quiet, wrapping around Harry like a hug.

“More,” he whispers. “Please.” 

Louis nods. “I like cuddles and I like cosy moments spent wrapped up in blankets. I like tea and cherries. I like the colour red and I enjoy trash tv every now and then. I like leaves crunching underneath my feet in autumn and I like when bees sit on sunflowers.” Harry can't help but smile at the image Louis paints. He drinks his tea quietly, listening to Louis' list of all these things, and he doesn't know why, but it helps. It helps make him forget about everything that's happened and comforts him. It's so simple, but it means everything. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Harry wears a pink dress with thin shoulder straps and two dark pink stripes going along the chest that are tied into bows in the middle. The dress is tight around his chest but the material is stretchy, adjusting to his body shape perfectly before it falls loose around his waist. It tickles his ankles every time he takes a step. He has a matching dark pink ribbon tied around his neck. Knowing he'll be walking alot, Harry puts on his Sambas. He steps outside his door at the same time as Louis. The alpha is wearing blue and white striped shorts and a white t-shirt with sunglasses tucked on the neck and a cap on his head. 

“Looking cute, love,” he says, making Harry blush and smile. 

“Thank you, Lou.” Harry smiles bashfully. 

“You’ve got sunscreen on?” He asks. Harry giggles and nods. “Good, I’m glad. Let’s go then.”

Louis has offered to drive and Harry isn’t upset about the fact that instead of a stuffy bus ride they are sitting in a car with aircon. He happily accepts Louis' phone to control the music while Louis concentrates on driving. It’s a thirty minute drive, enough for Harry to play some of his favourite Stevie Nicks and Taylor Swift songs, carefully gauging Louis' reactions to his choice of songs, and he can’t help but grin when Louis hums along to Afterglow. 

They stop halfway through their ride to get some croissants and coffee. Louis parks them securely and then they get out. It’s a hot day and Harry regrets not having anything to cover his head. 

When they reach the strawberry farm, they don’t waste too much time before getting started, Harry having brought his own basket while Louis gets one from the small strawberry shaped shop where you’ll later pay for everything you picked.

“Explain to me why you like this so much when you could just as well get them in a store,” Louis says eventually. They’ve switched to Louis holding the baskets and Harry picking the strawberries off after Louis started eating more than actually picking them. 

“It’s nice. And calming. And I want a garden one day where I can grow fruits and veggies myself. I like this sort of work. It’s hard but it’s so worth it and rewarding.” 

“That makes sense. Do you want to move away from London then?” Louis asks and Harry has to ponder the question. He doesn’t think he will. But he also doesn’t want to stay in the centre of it all like they are now. 

“I wouldn’t be opposed to it but I don’t know. I can pretty much work from anywhere so that’s not an issue, but I’m not sure if i’d want to move completely away from the city, nevertheless Niall and Zayn,” he settles on and Louis nods, holding the basket closer to Harry so he can gently put another handful of strawberries inside of it. 

“They’re lovely, the two of them. I’ve only met them once but I can tell how much love and happiness is between them.” Harry smiles up at Louis and hums. 

“Yeah, they’re the best. We always joke that I’m their first child because of the way they take care of me. I’m grateful for them.”

“They look out for you. That’s good. They love you a lot.” 

“Yeah. They’re kinda all I've got.”

“Harry, can I ask you what happened Friday night? It’s none of my business, I know that but I’m worried.”

Harry gets up and strokes his hair out of his face. He’s hot and sweaty, his hair clinging to him, but the basket is almost full and he feels happy. 

“I was out with my friends. And one of them did something stupid. My omega panicked and I ran off and then you were there.” 

“You were close to dropping, you were barely coherent I- god, my alpha was screaming at me to scent you and take care of you.”

“But you didn’t.”

“No. No, because I wasn’t sure if it would help you or make you drop or if it would make you hate me once you came out of that state. I figured you don’t have the best connections to alphas and I don’t want to be a source of anxiety for you. We’re neighbours, I don’t want you to feel unsafe in your own flat just because of our biology. It was hard to not do anything when your omega and your scent were both screaming at me to do something, but I was scared we’d regret it. I like you, I’d consider us friends, and I don’t want to ruin what we’ve built so far just because I couldn’t control my alpha.” 

“I wouldn’t have been mad, I don’t think. I cuddle with Niall all the time. It helps me feel better temporarily, until my omega realises he's mated and expecting a pup. I know that sometimes what our secondary gender needs isn’t what we want, but I also understand that in certain cases the wellbeing of the secondary gender is more important than anything else. I know that many other alphas would’ve caved and scented me or- I wouldn’t have been mad, because I know you wouldn’t have done anything bad. You are right, I’ve had more bad experiences with alphas than good, but I’m beginning to trust you and I think my omega already trusts you judging by the way it completely took over once you arrived at the door Friday night. It knew you’d kept me safe. I wouldn’t have minded but I appreciate it even more that you didn’t do it, that me as a person, was more important to you than our biology. It means more to me than you can imagine. Thank you for taking care of me while respecting my boundaries,” he says and Louis gives him the softest smile of them all. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

With baskets full of strawberries, they pay and Louis also goes a bit crazy with all the other things that you can buy from the little strawberry cottage. 

He ends up with a tote bag filled with strawberry cookies, strawberry lollies, and strawberry tea. Harry just stopped him from also getting strawberry jam, insisting that part of the reason why they were there in the first place was so Harry could make his own. Louis had only vaguely pouted, but that was quickly lifted when he found strawberry pens.  

Once they’re at the car, Louis gets each of them a bottle of chilled water that Harry gulps down desperately, quenching his thirst. 

They eat almost the entire pack of strawberry cookies on their way home, accompanied by music from Hozier. 

“We can make the jam together if you want?” Harry offers once Louis has parked the car and they get out. He goes to grab the baskets while Louis takes the tote bag and the cooler from the trunk. 

“Oh, I’d love that,” he says, sounding genuinely excited and Harry grins. 

“I would make it today though.” Harry looks at Louis who nods. 

“Fine with me,” he agrees. 

They walk up the stairs, Louis quickly putting the cooler and tote bag in his flat while Harry unlocks the door to his own. He’s glad that his flat is relatively cool, a stark contrast to the heat outside that makes goosebumps rise on Harry’s skin. 

“Want something to drink?” He asks Louis, who is not so subtly looking around his flat, even though he’s been here more than once. 

“Yes, that’d be nice.” 

“Are you okay with strawberry milk? You’ve got me a bit crazy with all the strawberry food now.” Harry giggles and Louis grins. 

“Strawberry milk sounds good. Don’t think I have had any in years.” 

“I sometimes crave it like a madman,” Harry tells him as he grabs a bunch of strawberries and washes them. “It’s like a guilty pleasure.” 

“Why guilty? It’s nothing to be ashamed of.” 

“Well it’s kinda a children’s drink isn’t it? Strawberry milk and chocolate milk?” He explains, mashing the strawberries. 

Louis shrugs. “Does it matter? You like it, that’s what is important, no?”

“I suppose that’s true,” Harry muses, finishing their drinks by placing a straw inside each glass before he slides one over to Louis  who immediately takes a sip. 

“Fuck, this is good,” he sighs, making Harry smile happily. 

“I’m glad. Shall we get started then?” He asks and Louis nods. 

“We have to cut the stem off first,” Harry explains, washing the strawberries thoroughly to make sure they’re clean. “Want to do that while I sterilise the jars?” He asks, placing a cutting board and knife in front of Louis once he nods. Harry boils some water while Louis cuts the strawberries. 

“Hey, you’re eating all of them.” He pouts when he watches Louis cut the stem off of two strawberries before eating them. 

“Am not,” he argues, still chewing and Harry gives him a look. 

“Okay… but they’re just super sweet.” He cuts the stem off another one before holding it up to Harry who takes it. It’s sweet and juicy and Harry could eat the entire basket they filled with strawberries. 

“They’re really good,” he says, licking some juice from his lips. “But still, jam first.”

With a pout, Louis goes back to cutting the strawberries while Harry sanitises the jam jars in the boiling water, carefully placing them on a kitchen towel to let them dry once they’ve been in the water for a couple minutes. 

“I think that should be enough,” Harry says, looking at the bowl of strawberries Louis cut. 

They puree them before they cook them in with sugar, before adding an alternative to gelatine. Louis is eager to help, as he stands beside Harry, stirring the mixture with a wooden spoon as it simmers on the stove. The sweet aroma of strawberries fills the kitchen, making both of them smile. 

"Smells amazing, doesn't it?" Harry comments, glancing at Louis who nods enthusiastically.

"Yeah, it does. I can't wait to taste it," Louis replies, his eyes fixed on the bubbling pot. As the jam thickens, Harry takes a moment to admire the way Louis looks in his kitchen, focused and determined, the sun painting over his face. The alpha turns to him, giving him a soft smile.

"You've got a little something..." Louis mumbles, pointing to his own cheek. 

“Oh.” Harry blushes and grins sheepishly. He wipes over his cheeks and looks to Louis who shakes his head with a small grin. The alpha steps forward, wiping his thumb over Harry's cheek. 

“There,” he says.   

"Thanks," Harry mumbles, his cheeks flushing pink.

Once the jam reaches the desired consistency, Harry turns off the heat and Louis carefully pours it into the sterilised jars. Louis helps him seal the jars tightly before they set them aside to cool. They had enough for five jars and Harry already knows he wants to give one to Zayn and Niall. 

"Now we just have to wait for them to cool down completely," Harry says, wiping his hands on a kitchen towel.

Louis nods, his eyes still fixed on the jars of jam sitting on the counter. 

"I can't believe we made our own strawberry jam," he says, sounding genuinely amazed. ”I mean it's so simple and probably tastes so much better than store bought jam. Just think what else we could make ourselves.” 

Harry giggles at him. "Yeah, it's pretty cool, isn't it?" He says and Louis nods. 

“So what do you say, when can we taste it?” Louis asks, looking at the jars. 

“I'd wait until tomorrow morning to let it really settle.” 

“Mhm, breakfast is gonna be hard for me but what do you say to brekkie for dinner? We could make a whole thing out of it.” Louis says and Harr blinks at him. 

“Brekkie for dinner?” He asks and Louis nods. “You want to eat breakfast for dinner with me?” 

“Uhhh… yeah?” Louis says unsurely. “If you don't want to, then that's cool, I just thought since we made it together, it's only right we try it together.” 

“I’d love that.” Harry smiles. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

So, Harry might have gone a bit overboard. 

He's baked bread and another batch of franzbrötchen and he may or may not have spent way too long pressing fresh orange juice, leading to his wrists hurting once he was done. He also made poached eggs and prepared a fruit platter and cut avocados into slices. 

He's baked bread.  

He carries all of it outside where Louis already is standing on his side of the balcony, two steaming mugs with tea in front of him. 

“Want to come over? Might make things easier,” Harry asks, placing his tray down and Louis nods, jumping over the railing. “You've got to stop doing that.” Harry chastises the alpha who only gives him a smug grin before he turns around and grabs the cups. “It's not funny, what if something happens to you?” He worries

“It won’t, it's not like it's much of a jump anyway. Besides, it's quicker that way.”

“I don't like it.” Harry pouts and watches Louis' expression soften. 

“Alright pup, I’ll stop,” Louis promises before sitting down on the sofa. ”This looks so good. Bread looks amazing.” 

“I made it myself,” Harry admits as he sits down, a light flush on his cheeks.

“You baked bread?” Louis asks with admiration in his voice and Harry nods shyly. “Wow. “Can I?” He asks, pointing to it and Harry nods again. 

“Of course.” Immediately Louis cuts a few slices, with an excited smile, grabbing the smallest and breaking off a piece to chew on. 

“This is amazing!” Louis exclaims still chewing, making Harry giggle happily as he sits down next to the alpha. 

“Glad you like it,” he mumbles, taking one of the bread slices. 

A comfortable silence settles over them as they eat.

“The jam is so good, I can't wait to let Evie and Lius try it,” he says and Harry smiles at him. Louis' love for his niece and nephew might just be the most adorable thing ever. 

“Tell me how they liked it then?” Harry asks and Louis nods. 

“Of course.” 

Happy thoughts are eating breakfast for dinner and the smell of fresh bread mixed with tea and cinnamon. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

With summer coming to an end and London only having so many warm days to spare, it wasn’t a surprise when the weather took an abrupt change and the temperature dropped accompanied by heavy rain clouds. Harry’s cooped up in his flat, mostly cuddled in his nest with a blanket and an itch to watch Gilmore Girls, but he's telling himself to wait a bit longer until fall really rolls around so New Girl it is. He doesn't intend to leave his flat for as long as it's raining, happy to have the raindrops hit his windows and lull him to sleep. 

He has already muted all his friends, tired of their explanations and excuses, and Niall and Zayn are busy preparing themselves to birth their pup, so really, it's not like he has anything to do. 

Until there is a knock on his door on Saturday at noon. It's still raining heavily, and Harry has already turned on all his fairy lights and salt lamps and lit his favourite candles, making his flat smell faintly of lemon blueberry muffins.

“Louis,” Harry says, slightly surprised when he opens his door, though he can’t help but smile since it's been at least a week since he’s last seen the alpha. 

“Hey.” He smiles, pushing his hair out of his face with one hand. 

“Hi.” Harry tilts his head to the side. Louis is wearing blue jeans and a seemingly black shirt, though it’s mostly covered by an oversized black hoodie jacket. 

“Are you free?” Louis asks and Harry frowns. 

“Depends?” He says slowly, not sure what Louis wants.

“RIght, absolutely no pressure. It just feels like forever since I saw you and I wanted to check in if you're alright and I also ordered some things for us to do. if you're up for it, of course,” he says, holding up a bag that Harry did not notice before. “I basically saw your list? Your to do list? That's probably not the right word but the glittery one on your fridge and… I know you don't like doing things on your own, which I totally get especially when it comes to social stuff, and some of the things on that list seemed fun so I kinda ordered everything to make candles? Like literally everything, and I suppose I could do it with Evie and Lius too if you don't want to but I'd love to do it with you,” the alpha rambles and Harry can't help but blush, overwhelmed at the gesture, though, then he remembers what this could mean. 

“Are you uhm… Are you- courting me?” He asks unsure, watching Louis eyes widen and a bright blush form on his cheeks as he shakes his head. 

“No! No, I swear I'm not. It totally seems like that, doesn't it? Fuck H, I’m so sorry I don’t- You know what I’ll just go. This. This totally looks like it and it's not at all what I had in mind. I swear I just- I like you. As friends. I think we're good friends and I like to do things with my friends- friendly friend things y’know? But yeah, no, I totally see how this comes across and I'll shut up now and leave and-”

“I get it Louis, you're not courting me,” Harry says and Louis nods.

“No,” the alpha breathes out. 

“Well, I'd love to make candles with you as a friendly friend thing,” Harry giggles. 

“Really?” Louis asks and Harry nods. 

“Yeah, of course.”

Louis nods again, still looking unsure, so Harry opens his door further to invite the alpha in. 

“It's really sweet of you, thank you,” Harry says, watching as Louis carefully places the bag on his dinner table and starts to pull things out. 

“So, I might've gone a bit overboard with the things I bought but- I'm not one for online shopping, you know because once you start it's hard to stop, and this is kinda exactly what happened here too,” Louis explains, still not done pulling things out, so Harry moves closer. 

“Lou, we could start a whole candle making business with this,” he says, picking up a big bag of soy melts: one of five . 

“I know,” the alpha whines, embarrassed, as he pulls out another bag of soy wax, making Harry splutter a laugh. 

“So, I guess we’ve got this year's Christmas presents sorted?”

“You must think I'm crazy,” Louis says as he pulls out different silicone forms. 

“I think you're nice and considerate. It means a lot Louis, really,” Harry says, giving the alpha an honest smile. 

“Okay good, because I spent my entire night reading up on all the best tips and tricks to make candles and it’d be a shame to let all that useless knowledge get to waste.” 

“Of course,” Harry nods seriously. “Tell us what to do.” 

They melt the soy wax in different pots so they can add different scents. Harry goes with vanilla and pumpkin spice for one of his pots and lavender for his other, while Louis goes with sage and honey for his first pot and vanilla and black cherries for the second.

Surprisingly, the strong scents don't make Harry nearly as dizzy as he thought they would. They slowly let the wax beads melt until it's a clear liquid. Harry stirs them gently while Louis prepares the silicone forms. 

“D’you want to colour yours? I have glitters and pretty much every colour under the rainbow.” 

“Do you have blue?” He asks and Louis nods, holding the colour up. 

“Then I want blue.” He smiles and Louis comes over to him, having his own bottle of green colouring. 

They mix in the colours, creating beautiful pastel colours. Harry bites his lip to contain the big grin from splitting his face in half when Louis stands close to him, seemingly having as much fun as Harry. He knows none of his other friends would ever do this with him. Zayn and Niall would definitely indulge him but it would be more for the sake of Harry than their actual enjoyment, but Louis is enjoying this and it means a lot to Harry. 

They pour the wax into different moulds until nothing is left and Harry can’t wait to see the final results. As it is, they have to wait, so Harry makes them both tea and gets out some biscuits while he allows Louis to choose a movie for them to watch,. It’s the least he can do after everything the alpha has done for him. 

Louis ends up picking Spirited Away. 

“Okay?” He asks when Harry joins him and Harry nods. 

“More than.” 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Harry wakes up cuddled close to Louis. The alpha has his arms tightly wound around Harry and for a moment he panics, feeling constricted until the warm scent of black tea washes over him and Harry feels himself relax, the fear turning into comfort. Harry takes a deep breath of the scent and falls asleep again. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

The second time he wakes up, it's without the solid feeling of Louis beneath him but to the smell of food. Harry yawns and rubs his eyes before sitting up, noticing the blanket that's covering him wasn't there before. He stretches and strokes his hair out of his face before he looks toward his kitchen where sounds are coming from. 

Harry smiles when he sees Louis standing there, wearing Harry's pink frilly apron and seemingly trying to whisk something. His tongue is poking out and his brows are furrowed in concentration. Harry stands up and carefully walks towards him, smiling when the alpha doesn't even notice him. 

“Need help there?” Harry asks, voice still sleep ridden and Louis flinches in shock, dropping the whisk. “Jeez I thought you were asleep!” He breathes out, making Harry laugh. 

“Just woke up,” he states the obvious. 

“Yeah I can see that, darling.” Louis rolls his eyes but there is a soft smile on his lips. “Slept well?” He asks, bending down to pick up the whisk and Harry takes a small step back to give him more space. 

“I did, yeah,” Harry says, only now realising it himself. Harry can’t remember the last time he slept through the night, let alone outside his nest. 

“Good, I’m glad.” Louis rinses the whisk shortly before stepping back up to the bowl. 

“Did uhm… did you sleep well?” 

“Like a newborn.” Louis nods, starting to whisk again. Harry watches his movements, trying his best not to say anything about the way he is whisking. 

“You’re judging me,” Louis says, making Harry flush at being caught. 

“‘M not,” he argues, the words coming out way too quickly. 

“You so are, look at you.” Louis laughs, pointing at him. “All pouty and frowny. You're not even supposed to be awake yet! I was gonna wake you up with breakfast.” 

“Oh,” Harry mumbles, feeling awful. 

“Exactly, so go sit outside and I'll join you once it's done.” 

Harry pouts. “But I can help.” 

“But I don’t want you to help, come on, I'll bring you tea in a sec.” 

Defeated, Harry sighs and allows Louis to gently guide him outside. Within seconds, there is a blanket thrown over his lap and his current read is in his hands. It happens so fast, Harry doesn't even know what to say so he just opens the book and keeps reading, smiling bashfully when Louis brings him a cup of lavender tea. 

Around 20 minutes later, Louis joins him outside. He is carrying a tray filled with scrambled eggs, avocado, fruit, and toast. Harry puts his books away and bites his lips, feeling overwhelmed by the situation. This is something an alpha would do for someone they’re courting – Strike that, their mate. 

“Alright?” Louis asks and Harry hums. 

“Yeah uhm- yeah. Thank you for this.”

“Dig in.” Louis smiles, grabbing a piece of toast while Harry goes for the fruit first. 

Harry tries not to overthink it. Louis is nicer than most alphas he’s ever encountered—probably the nicest next to Niall. He’s attentive and sweet, genuinely interested in Harry’s likes and hobbies, and they’ve both established that they’re just friends. Harry finds comfort in that, especially since he doesn’t think he’s anywhere close to wanting a relationship. Not with all the issues weighing on him.

The constant dizziness that lingers like a shadow, the absence of his heat, and the way he’s always on the brink of dropping are just a few reasons why he knows he wouldn’t be useful in a relationship. He worries that he can’t bear pups, though he has no actual proof of that—he simply can’t bring himself to visit a doctor. The last thing he wants is to be loaded up with medications that might make things worse. No alpha could ever want him, not when he feels like such a failure as an omega.

On top of that, Harry is still working to move on from his last relationship. He’s grappling with the sting of constant sexist comments aimed at him and omegas in general, the verbal abuse that chipped away at his self-esteem, and the absence of love that left him feeling hollow. During that relationship, he started showing signs of being touch-starved, and from there, it only spiralled downward. The memories of feeling unwanted and belittled linger, casting a long shadow over his interactions with others. He often wonders if he’ll ever truly recover from the emotional scars left behind, and whether he can allow himself to trust again.

Harry concentrates on the food as they make light small talk and he insists on cleaning everything up once they're done. Louis sits on his counter all the while, drying the dishes Harry has washed while he talks about the Marvel universe. And Harry wants to listen, loves listening to Louis talk about any and everything, but he can’t stop thinking about if this may mean more to Louis than it does to Harry. 

“I can’t date you!” He blurts out, stopping Louis mid sentence. 

“Excuse me?” Louis asks. Harry dries his hands and turns to Louis. 

“I just want to be upfront with you. I like you. I like you a lot. I’d consider you a close friend but I won’t date you.” 

“Who said anything about dating?” Louis looks confused.

“No one but- you are… you're acting like you're courting me and I just don't want to give you false hope or lead you on.”

“H,” Louis says softly. “We’re friends. I like you and yes, I think you're attractive, but I’m definitely not courting you. I like to take care of the people that mean something to me. Whether they're my family, or a friend. And yes, my alpha feels rather protective over you but can you blame me? The amount of times you’re in distress or scared or crying I- I just want to help, be there for you. I enjoy spending time with you, and you're not some little thing I pity and have to prove my alpha to. You're my friend and this is me being your friend. I- I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable. If you need your space or anything, tell me. You live here. I don't want you to feel unsafe in any way.”

Tears have welled up in Harry's eyes and he looks down. “I'm sorry I- god, I'm awful. You’ve never made me feel uncomfortable, Louis. You’re one of the only people I feel completely at ease with, where I can be myself. I’m… I think I was just overthinking. I don't know. I had fun last night and I love spending time with you, please ignore anything I ever said. Gosh I'm so sorry,” Harry whines, hiding his face in his hands.

“Harry, darling,” Louis says, gently tugging his hands from his face. “I always want you to speak your mind. I always want you to say what you think. Communication is important and I want us to be on the same page. It's good that you brought it up, I'm glad even. And if you ever worry about something or- i don't even know, but please talk to me,” Louis says and Harry nods. 

“You uhm… you too. If I annoy you, or do something that you don't like. I can be very clingy. I-” 

“I’ll tell you if something should come up though I hardly doubt it,” Louis promises. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Harry is on the phone with Zayn as he trudges up the stairs to his flat, coming home from a walk to his favourite pastry shop. Zayn is excitedly telling him all about his most recent ultrasounds, having entered his 22nd week. Harry is listening intently, feeling excited himself at the gushing voice of his best friend. Zayn has promised to send him the pictures and Harry cannot wait to see them. 

Hands full, he stands at his door for five minutes, talking to Zayn when he hears some noise behind him. Harry turns, humming along to Zayn telling him about his most recent cravings when he makes eye contact with Louis who looks at him questioningly, a smile on his face. Harry grins back, trying to motion he's on his phone. Louis nods and steps up, taking his bags from him and Harry feels relieved that he doesn't have to carry them anymore. 

“Keys?” Louis whispers and Harry points to one of the bags, answering Zayn. 

“Tea?” He asks almost soundlessly, pointing inside his flat once Louis has unlocked his door and Louis nods, grabbing his bags and following Harry into his flat. 

Louis gets the kettle started while Harry takes off his shoes. 

“Zee? I've got to go but we can go furniture shopping soon.” 

“God please, I really tried with Niall but… well he's a hopeless case really. He picked out beige for the wall, petal! Beige?! I won't have a sad beige baby.” 

“No you won’t Zee, don't worry! We're gonna make this the best baby room ever, I promise.”

“Really?” Zayn asks, sounding choked up and Harry bites his lip. 

“Yes really… are you uhm- are you crying?” He asks when Zayn sniffs and Zayn confirms it with a wail. 

“It's just the hormones!” He excuses and Harry giggles.

“I'll text Niall to take care of you Zee. I love you.”

“I love you more petal. So much. Ignore me! Really, it's just hormones.” 

“Alright,” Harry says carefully and Zayn sniffs again. 

“I'll end the call so you won't feel as bad,” Zayn says and a second later, the line goes silent. Fondly, Harry shakes his head before he quickly goes to wash his hands before he joins Louis, who has already unpacked his bags. 

“Hi Lou,” Harry greets the alpha, grabbing two mugs and placing them next to the kettle. 

“Hi darling. Zayn alright?” He asks and Harry hums, searching through his tea selection. 

“He is. Just had another ultrasound today and was super emotional. And well then he started crying which made me feel really bad about hanging up on him but I missed you.” He pouts and Louis chuckles. 

“I’m sure he understands.”

“Yeah,” Harry sighs, settling on peppermint tea while he grabs yorkshire for Louis. It's warm outside and Harry is still slightly sweaty from walking in the sun but he can't go without his tea. 

Louis pours the water into the cups as Harry plates the pastries while he lets out a yawn. He's not been sleeping well ever since the night he fell asleep in Louis' arms. It's been a week since then and Harry's omega is always searching for the scent of tea and cinnamon. Work has also been stressful and he promised his friends to go out with them over the weekend, having managed to say no a couple times now even if that made him panic and feel awful. 

“Tired?” Louis asks, resting his hand on the small of Harry's back. “I can leave.” 

“No!” Harry rushes out and clears his throat. “No, please stay. I invited you here and- well we barely saw each other over the course of the past week and I’ve missed you.” 

“I’ve missed you too pup,” Louis says, giving him a soft smile. 

“Can we just chill on the couch and watch tv? I think I'm too exhausted for anything else,” Harry says. 

Louis nods. “Of course.” 

They carry everything over and Harry curls up in one corner, smiling when Louis sits down next to him and hands him his cup. 

One and a half pastries and a cup of tea later, Harry feels himself fully relax, subtly sniffing out Louis cinnamon and tea scent, allowing it to wash over and comfort him.

A documentary on penguins is playing in the background and Harry finds himself being lulled to sleep, sagging against the alpha. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Harry pulls down his skirt, regretting his choice of outfit as he walks around the club. It’s a black jeans skirt that he doesn’t remember being as short as it is. It earns him multiple lustful gazes from people, mostly alphas, but Harry tries his best to ignore them as he makes his way back to his friends. 

It’s a Friday night and Harry had to pass up a board game night with Louis for this. He definitely regrets not saying yes to Louis when the alpha had asked him the previous day. 

Now Harry is at some fancy club, drinking drinks he doesn’t like with people he doesn’t like. 

Harry slips into the booth, shortly after him River follows, squeezing him in beside him and Banks. The alphas immediately start talking, leaning over Harry and invading his space. Harry bites his lip, tries to ignore the heavy scents wafting off them, but whatever they are talking about intensifies it. 

Harry tries to only breathe through his nose but it doesn’t help much, not with how close they are to him. 

“Guys…” He says carefully. “Can you give me some room?” 

“Can’t you see we’re talking?” Banks snarls, making Harry flinch. 

“Yeah Harry, c’mon. It’s not nice to interrupt,” River adds. 

“Sorry,” Harry mumbles, feeling his omega submitting and loathing himself for it. 

Shots are shared and Harry drinks because it’s the only thing he can do to keep his mind off his situation and when Banks and River finally decide they have enough and get up, Harry follows them to the dance floor. 

He’s drunk, his steps miscalculated as he sways but he makes it onto the dance floor and it doesn’t take long until arms engulf him from behind and he’s being grinded on by an alpha. Harry hates it, feels dizzier by the second, but maybe it’s what he deserves given how much of a failure he is. 

He only really realises what’s going on when he’s standing outside, the alpha pressing kisses to his neck as they wait for an Uber or something. It’s then that Harry understands what’s going on and without thinking, he shoves his elbow into the alpha’s stomach, earning him a growl but the arms fall off him and Harry can step away. 

“Fucking whore,” the alpha growls and Harry turns and runs, only stopping once he’s outside his building. He’s panting, the world is spinning and next thing he knows he’s doubling over and throwing up in the street. 

“Alright, I’ve got you,” someone says behind him, arms wrapping around him and Harry recognises that voice. 

“Lou,” he sobs, knees buckling. The alpha catches him, tightening his hold on Harry and humming. 

“I’ve got you pup, just don’t drop.” 

“Can’t drop. Haven’t in so long. Am fucked up,” he slurs out, groaning when Louis picks him up, arms under his back and knees. 

“You’re not fucked up, love. I promise you.” 

“I am… ‘m so- don’t even have heats anymore. It’s been over a… think over a year. So fucked up.” 

“Okay pup, you need to sleep,” Louis says and Harry is pretty sure they’re walking up the stairs. 

“Bad omega,” he mumbles, resting his head on Louis' shoulder. 

“You’re not bad, Harry,” Louis says and Harry giggles, though his giggles turn into tears by the time Louis steps in front of his flat. 

Louis unlocks the door and kicks it close with his left foot before he opens the bedroom door, stopping in the doorframe. 

“H, you’ve got your nest in here, don’t you?” He asks and Harry hums. 

“Don’t like it,” he mumbles, knowing his omega is never 100% at ease in it. 

“I’m sure it’s lovely,” the alpha says, making Harry whine. “You’re fine pup,” Louis whispers and Harry realises he’s scenting the air, the thick smell of tea and cinnamon surrounding Harry, comforting him. 

“Want my nest,” Harry slurs nonetheless, knowing he’ll get even less rest in his bed. 

“Are you okay with me taking you there?” Louis asks and Harry finds himself getting annoyed. The alpha is asking too many questions, making his dizzy head swim even more. 

“Yes,” he mumbles and Louis laughs. 

“Alright little grump, stop the growling.” 

And yeah, Harry is growling. He blushes at the realisation, burying his head closer to the alpha in a quiet apology. 

Louis only thickens his scent and carries Harry around the dresser behind which he has his nest hidden. Louis lays him down with all the care in the world before he quickly pulls his shoes off for him. 

“Sleep well, pup,” Louis says, making Harry whine. 

“Stay,” he says, his hand blindly searching for Louis and he smiles softly when the alpha catches it. 

“I can’t. Not in your nest,” he replies softly. 

“Bed then.”

“No Harry.” Louis squeezes his hand in a quiet apology. 

“Please,” he whines, knows he’s letting out distressed pheromones. 

“How about I leave you my shirt here, yeah? And tomorrow when you’re awake and ready to face the world again we can spend some time together. But I can’t sleep here, lovely.” 

“Shirt.” Harry nods, happy when a few moments later there’s a warm, soft shirt in his hands that smells like cinnamon and tea. Harry cuddles it close, curling up in a tight ball and burying his nose in it. 

“Good night, pup,” the alpha whispers, pulling a blanket over Harry. Harry barely notices anymore, already drifting off into sleep.

Chapter Text

When Harry wakes up it’s to the smell of cinnamon and tea and a major headache. There is, however, a glass of water and some pain killers sitting next to him. He drinks the water greedily, popping two of the pills into his mouth before he lays back down with a groan, covering his face with the shirt he had his face buried in when he woke up. 

He stays like that for approximately 20 minutes before he gets up and drags himself into the shower. He feels dirty, vaguely remembers throwing up and- Louis . Harry’s stomach drops with embarrassment when he remembers how he acted, how the alpha found him. God, Harry wants to die. He can never look at the alpha again, lest he die from mortification. 

Once he feels clean again, Harry gets out and takes his time doing his skin care and getting dressed, even going as far as contemplating redoing his nails in the confines of his bedroom, but bile rose up in his throat when he smelled the stinging scent after opening the bottle so he quickly threw that idea out again. 

Sighing, Harry decides to make breakfast, not daring to open his balcony door even though it feels like his flat is slowly cooking him alive and he‘d love some fresh air, but the possibility of seeing Louis scared Harry too much. 

He makes himself breakfast, standing in the kitchen because he knows if he would sit down on his sofa, Louis could see him if he were standing on his balcony. 

He feels slightly better once he has eaten something and drank his tea but then a new wave of tiredness overcomes him. Without having much else to do, Harry decides to nap the day away. He’s technically supposed to meet up with his friends later that night, but given how the previous night went, Harry will opt out. 

He's just walking past his front door when there’s a knock. Startled, Harry carefully walks towards the door and looks through his spy, tensing when he sees Louis standing there. He sighs and steps away but the alpha knocks again. 

“Harry come on, I’m getting worried.” Louis' voice sounds muffled coming through the door and while Harry would like to just ignore him. His omega doesn’t want the alpha to be worried about him, not with the way he was taking care of him the previous night. 

So, taking one last big breath, Harry opens the door. 

“Hi,” he mumbles, focusing on Louis' shirt instead of his face where he knows he’ll be met with worried blue eyes. 

“Hey H,” Louis says. “How are you?” 

“M’fine. Been better but, y’know.” He shrugs and Louis hums. 

“Have you eaten? I know the best brekky for hangovers. Works like a charm every time,” Louis says and Harry nods. 

“Yeah, I’ve eaten. Was just about to go to sleep actually so…” Harry says. 

“Did I- did I do something wrong last night?” Louis asks, confused, and Harry shakes his head. 

“No!” He rushes to say. “No you didn't- It’s…It's me. I acted inappropriately and I’m- god, I’m so embarrassed.” 

“Embarrassed? About what, babe?” Louis asks and Harry resists the urge to whine. 

“You really gonna make me repeat all of the shameful things I did last night? You had to carry me up the stairs, Louis! That’s- And oh god please don’t tell me I threw up on you. I want to die,” Harry panics, his eyes shooting up when Louis laughs 

“Stop laughing, this is not funny!” 

“Alright, it’s not. Well it’s a little bit. But you’re sweet. Anyway, gonna let me in so we can talk? I can’t believe you were avoiding me because of this.” 

Harry sighs but opens the door further, letting the alpha in. 

Harry closes his eyes and shuts the door, taking his time to breathe in deep before he follows the alpha into his living area. Louis is already opening the balcony door and has the kettle started, fluttering around while Harry just sits down on the sofa, feeling overwhelmed. 

Eventually, he has a tea cup in his hands and Louis sitting close to him, staring at him intently. “How about we talk about last night?” 

“Do we have to?” Harry asks and Louis nods. 

“After the way you acted, yes.” 

Harry groans. 

“Harry, stop. You drank a bit more than you can handle, which - I won’t go all alpha on you for that even though I’d love to because so much could’ve happened - but you’re a grown person who can make his own decisions. You made it home safe and well I just saw you running down the street, obviously I was a bit worried when you suddenly started throwing up, so I ran down and you kinda passed out in my arms. I got you home instead of letting you sleep on the street.”

“No, you carried me home, listened to me whine, and fuck I growled at you and I stole your shirt too because I’m a failure and apparently have a thing for humiliating myself.” 

“Or, you felt vulnerable and didn’t want to be alone. Harry, you're making a thing out of something that’s nothing. I swear I didn’t mind it one bit. We’re friends, it makes sense that you get comforted by my scent and your omega apparently feels safe with me which- that’s great, isn’t it? You’ve told me how much you struggle with alphas so… this is a win for you, babes. Nothing about last night was in any way inappropriate or made me feel uncomfortable, so will you please stop overthinking and we can just watch tv and have a cuddle?” 

“You don’t hate me?” Harry asks and Louis shakes his head. 

“Definitely not. Come on now, you can pick something to watch.” 

“Well obviously, it’s my flat,” Harry says with a small smile, grabbing the remote and slumping against the alpha. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Harry doesn’t know exactly when it became a thing but then suddenly it is a thing:  cuddling with Louis, being close to Louis in general. It’s- it helps, he knows as much. It makes his omega feel good, makes his head feel less cloudy and his thoughts clearer, takes away the aches in his bones and lifts his headaches; things he all knows are symptoms of heavy touch starvation. 

Harry is scared he’ll drop, even though he knows it’s inevitable that he’ll experience a big drop sooner or later, he still doesn’t like to think too much about it because he knows if it’ll happen, he’ll want Louis to be there and he doesn’t know how he’s supposed to manage that or communicate that to the alpha. He knows if the alpha wanted to, he could easily make Harry drop, could make it good and safe for Harry instead of that cold, dark limbo he always is stuck in when he experiences a drop alone. 

He tries not to focus on that whenever he’s with the alpha though. 

They’re at Zayn and Niall's baby shower, the pair having hit the 28th week. They’ve just come home from their baby moon, a week spent in Italy and now they’re back spotting golden skin and the happiest smiles. Harry’s not jealous, not at all. 

He’s wearing loose fitting jeans with a white blouse with red detailing and a matching red ribbon around his neck, the grass tickling his feet since he’s taken off his ballerina shoes. Louis is next to him, drinking lavender soda and fiddling with his hair. His eyes are hidden behind shades and he’s wearing black shorts and a tank, his golden skin and tattoos on display. 

“God they’re so sweet, makes me want to throw up,” Louis says, eating a muffin but looking at Zayn and Niall. 

Harry giggles and shakes his head. “The muffins or Zee and Ni?”

“Zayn and Niall. The muffins are sick, do you want a bite?” Louis asks, holding the muffin up to Harry. 

“No, I’m good but thanks.”

“Alright,” Louis says the moment Zayn and Niall clink their glasses to draw everyone’s attention on them. 

Harry would be lying if he said he didn't shed some tears during their speech. He's had a front row view of their love story, was there to listen to Niall tell him about this omega he met and the anxiety of meeting someone, the first few fights, the first kiss all the way through their mating. Harry was there and now his two favourite people are bringing a new life into this world, one that is them in its purest way. Harry could not be happier. He lets out a wet chuckle when Louis wraps an arm around him. 

“M’fine,” he says. 

“I know,” Louis answers, giving a reassuring squeeze to his waist. 

The speech ends with Niall and Zayn kissing each other, underlined with all their guests clapping and cheering and Harry is happy to see he's not the only one with wet cheeks. 

The couple soon moves on to unwrapping the gifts, having been incredibly specific with the things they want, and the things they don’t want. Harry has already promised them to babysit whenever they need it, starting from the day the pup is born, all the way through their 18th birthday and Niall and Zayn had insisted that's plenty enough of a present, giving them time to spend just with each other. But Harry wanted to get them something else too, something personal, so he’s spent the last three months knitting and crocheting all kinds of clothes in various sizes because he knows how quickly pups grow in the beginning, a blanket that he plans on adding a row to every year for the pup’s birthday so the blanket grows with them and will hold the memories of the year, and lastly, a sprout stuffy that's thick and soft and perfect for cuddling. He made sure to get all the things scent neutralised so that Niall and Zayn can use them immediately. 

“Oh petal,” Zayn mumbles when he reads Harry's card, tears in his eyes when he looks up at Harry. Harry starts crying too, rushing into Nialls and Zayn's arms. 

“Sprouts gonna love you so much,” Niall says, his own voice sounding wet. 

“Yeah, you'll be their favourite,” Zayn agrees, making Harry giggle. 

“You’re gonna make the best parents, I’m really so happy for you two,” he mumbles, squeezing them closer before stepping away. He has to make sure he’ll see the two more often before the pup is born because he knows after that it’ll be a while before they get together again. 

He goes back to his place next to Louis, watching the last of the presents be unwrapped before people start to mingle. He barely knows any of the other people here so he sticks close to Louis, patiently waiting for Zayn and Niall to end up with them as they make their rounds talking to everyone. 

“Let's eat something,” Louis says, gently guiding Harry towards the buffet and they start filling a plate for them to share. It's mostly finger food and they sit down on one of the blankets Zayn and Niall have provided and decorated on theme. 

“D’you ever think about having pups?” Louis asks, eyes trained on Zayn's belly. Harry freezes mid bite. 

“Uhm- I mean. I think… I mean yeah, but I don’t- don’t think I can to be honest.” Harry swallows. 

“Oh- fuck I’m- I’m sorry love, I didn’t know,” Louis says. 

“No it's- I'm not sure but y’know between the whole not having had my heat in over a year and the always-on-the-edge-of-dropping-but-never-actually-dropping thing… I’m pretty fucked up.” 

“But you've never been to a doctor?” 

“No,” Harry says sharply. “Sorry,” he sighs. “Just, can we talk about something else, please?” 

Luckily, they don't have to search for a topic because Zayn suddenly sits down next to them, slumping himself against Harry with an exhausted sigh and grabbing their plate. 

“I refuse to stand any longer. My feet are hurting and I’m hungry and it’s so fucking hot, who decided to do this outside when we could be inside where there is air conditioning,” he whines, making Harry and Louis chuckle. 

“Here, drink something,” Harry says, offering Zayn his lemonade which the omega gratefully takes and empties before he starts eating. 

“Need anything else?” Louis asks and Zayn nods. 

“Niall and more food and drinks, for my petal too,” he says, looking at Harry and Louis nods. 

“I’ll be right back,” he promises, before he gets up, giving Harry a soft smile. 

“So, you and Louis?” Zayn asks once Louis is out of ear reach and Harry stiffens. 

“No. Just friends,” he says quietly, watching the alpha wait to get his turn at the buffet. 

“Sure, the same way me and Niall were just friends in the beginning.” 

“Zee,” Harry sighs. “It's not- I can’t and I don't want to. I like him as my friend, I don't want to ruin this.” 

“You know that your scent isn't as mellow and sour anymore. It's almost fully back and as sweet as ever. You’re getting better and you have him to thank for it. Besides, he’s hot as fuck and a gentleman and absolutely in love with you.”

“He’s not-” Harry lowers his voice. “He’s not in love with me, stop this Zayn, please. We agreed on being friends. Over a month ago I thought he was courting me and when I asked him he said no and I said I didn't want him to court me so we agreed on being friends.”

“Friends who smell like each other? Petal, if you were questioning whether he was courting you then he was definitely courting you. Trust me, he’d do whatever you tell him as long as he gets to keep you in his life, friends or lovers. Remember that breakfast where we invited him, when we first met him? He could not stop looking at you and barely answered any of Ni’s questions. I'm just saying darling, he wants you and I think you should let him. He's good for you, obviously takes care of you, and y’know, I’d feel better if I knew you have someone once sprout is born.” 

“God Zayn, you're acting like I can't be left alone. I don’t need a strong alpha taking care of me and providing for me. I’m doing just fine on my own.” 

“You're not though H, you’re partying and drinking and fuck if I know - doing drugs with those awful people who only use you for their benefit and lets not get me started on your mental and physical health. So no Harry, I love you but you can’t. But don’t you realise that you’ve been doing better ever since you met Louis? It's so painfully obvious to everyone but you because you're so stubborn.” Tears well up in Harry's eyes and he shakes his head. 

“You don't know me. You don’t know anything about me or my life or my friends or-”

“That's the thing Harry, I know you, I know you too well, you just don’t want to hear the truth-” 

“I’ve got two plates of food, drinks, and one Niall,” Louis interrupts them and Harry stands up. 

“I want to go home,” he says, glaring at Zayn. Niall is quick to stand in front of his pregnant mate and Louis does the same, placing himself slightly in front of Harry and it infuriates Harry to no end. He doesn't need an alpha to protect him. 

“What's going on here?” Niall asks quietly, calm and collected, the opposite of Harry, who feels like he's about to explode. 

“Zayns being an insensitive ass and a know-it-all,” Harry mutters, and Niall looks at Zayn. 

“Harry just can’t stand to hear the truth.” Zayn shrugs as if he isn’t bothered at all by this. Harry takes a step back, his heart feeling like it's being squeezed like a lemon and he wraps his arms around his stomach, trying to keep in his tears.

“Alright, it's been a long day and the sun is getting to our heads. Think we all just need a breather and some space,” Niall says. “Right babe?” He looks at Zayn. 

“Yeah sure. Especially Harry, because how dare someone tries to take care of him once in his life, he can do it all on his own.” 

“Okay, that's enough,” Louis says and turns to Harry, wrapping his arms around Harry's stomach and trying to lead him away. 

“Don’t touch me,” he growls and it's enough to make the tears roll down his face, big and hot as Louis steps away with a hurt expression on his face. 

So, Harry does what he’s best at, he turns around and runs. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Harry’s life seems to be a big fucking joke, as it starts to rain heavily on his way home. His phone is constantly buzzing in his pocket but Harry makes a point of ignoring it. He only looks at it one time, when he gets home, sees the string of messages and calls from Niall and Louis but Zayn’s contact doesn't show up, so he turns his phone off and falls into his bed, not caring that he's completely soaked through. 

He wakes up shivering to knocking on his door. Groaning, Harry gets up and strips out of his clothes, ignoring what is definitely Louis shouting his name, and goes to take a shower. Once he's done, he is still cold so he bundles up in warm clothes and shuffles into his nest, a whine slipping past his lips when he lands on the jumper Louis had given him after he admitted that he sleeps slightly better with the alpha’s scent close to him. And Louis being the kind man he is, has been handing out shirts and jumpers every few days without Harry having to ask again ever since. 

He inhales deeply once before he remembers that he's just as cross with Louis as he is with Zayn. He doesn't want Louis to be in love with him, he doesn't want all of the months he has spent with Louis, all the laughs and talks, all the worries and happy thoughts they shared be fake, just some act until Louis can finally fuck him. He doesn't want to lose his friend, the person he learned to trust so deeply to be just another alpha he can add to the list. Harry lets out a sob as he throws the jumper out of his nest, throws it out of his reach no matter how much it pains his omega to lose the comfort of the scent. He doesn't need an alpha. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Harry looks through his peep, has been looking through it for the past two minutes actually. It’s become his routine for the past two weeks. He's playing a sort of hide and seek game that makes him feel like a teenager trying to sneak out on his parent’s house, except that it's his neighbour he tries to hide from and avoid.

Louis had gotten close to catching him three days ago, shouting after Harry who in turn sprinted down the stairs, getting a glimpse of the alpha only wearing blue pyjama bottoms, luckily in no state to follow Harry. 

Harry knows it may be unfair of him, but he's hurt and needs time. Louis apparently hasn't given up on him though because every three days there is a bag in front of his door, holding a fresh shirt or jumper and there is always a note included too. Harry hasn't dared touch them, knows he’d crumble and probably go begging to Louis to forgive him even though Harry hasn't even done anything wrong. Yes, he misses Zayn, Niall, and Louis. He misses his friends . What he doesn't miss though, is people messing in his life, thinking they’ve got a say in it or pretending to be a friend when they have other intentions. He misses them despite it all but he also tries to prove a point; that he can take care of himself, that he doesn't need anybody, 

He slips out and ducks beneath Louis' door just in case before he rushes down the first flight of stairs. He lets out a breath of relief when he doesn't hear any doors open and keeps walking at a normal pace. What he doesn’t expect is Mrs Bakdshi. The elderly lady opens her door, her corgi jumping at Harry in excitement and he leans down to give him a few pats. 

“Harry,” she says, looking him up and down with something akin to disgust at his choice of outfit. 

“Hello Mrs Bakdshi,” he says politely.

“Going out I assume?” She asks and Harry nods. 

“Yeah.” 

“You know, when I was your age, I was already mated and married. Don’t you think it’s time to… leave all that behind,” she points at his outfit, “and settle down.” 

“Sure Mrs Bakdshi. Maybe I’ll meet the love of my life tonight, who knows. I gotta go now,” Harry says, trying not to sound too irritated. 

“I strongly doubt it, not dressed like that,” she huffs and Harry rolls his eyes and slips past her and her dog. 

Why is it that the whole world is against him?

He Ubers to the pub he is supposed to meet his friends at, too exhausted to go there by bus. He's still hungover from the night before, actually he can't quite remember a day in the last two weeks where he didn't wake up with a headache and every part of him aching in pain. He found that usually more alcohol helps. 

The pub is crowded. It was a hot, dry day so the scents lingering in the air are heavy and make Harry immediately dizzy upon entrance. It’s quiz night and Harry knows his friends have secured a table somewhere in the back. He fights his way through to the bar first though, needs something to take the edge off. He's being pushed and elbowed pretty much everywhere, hands touching him on accident too, and Harry gets dizzier when the third alpha bumps against one of his scent glands on his wrists, the scents overwhelming him. He breathes through his mouth, trying his best not to pass out from all the scents invading his nose. 

He smiles at the bartender and leans slightly forward in an attempt to get him to serve Harry more quickly. Luckily, it's another cock driven alpha who immediately comes over to Harry. 

“What can I get for you gorgeous?” He asks and Harry flutters his lashes at the compliment. God he wants to throw up. 

“Can you just fill me two glasses with tequila? It's a bit odd, I know.” He giggles. “But tonight I’m celebrating.” Harry twists a strand of hair around his finger, watching the alpha's eyes slip down his chest. Harry resisted the urge to roll his eyes. 

“Anything you want sweetheart.” The alpha grins and seconds later, Harry has his drinks and a piece of paper with the alphas number on it, the words 'it's on the house’ being seductively said to him when he goes to pay. Acting flattered, Harry turns and sways his hips until he knows the bartender is not looking anymore, then he crumples up the paper and carelessly lets it drop to the floor. He downs the first glass and places it on a random table he passes before he keeps fighting his way through the mass of people, less anxious now that his brain feels clouded from the tequila. 

He finally sees his friends, slipping into the booth they are sitting at and ending up next to River.

“Hey guys!” Harry smiles, glad to see full shot glasses on the table. They greet him back before they all cheer with the shot glasses, the liquor burning in Harry's throat as he swallows it. 

“Hey babe,” River says and yeah Harry might or might not have made out with River once… or twice. He deeply regretted it both times, felt disgusting and dirty afterwards, but the first time it just kinda happened and the second he was too drunk to really stop the alpha. It also happened outside his apartment and a twisted, vile part of him hoped that Louis saw. He might’ve made a show of it, kissing River deeply, jumping up and wrapping his arms and legs around him. 

When he got upstairs, there was a shirt in front of his door and Harry threw up and cried himself to sleep. 

River's hand comes to rest on Harry's thigh and Harry smiles at him. “Hi.” 

“You didn't call.” River leans in, his hand slipping higher. Luckily, Harry doesn't have to answer because at that moment, the moderator of the game starts the night. Harry smiles apologetically at River before he slightly turns his back to him, taking a big sip from his drink. Quiz nights at the pub are one of the only things Harry truly enjoys doing with his friends. 

He lets his eyes travel across the room once everything has settled down a bit, stopping when he sees someone with orange hair. The guy seems familiar to Harry, though he cannot quite place how he knows him. 

Harry doesn't have to guess for long, because a few moments later, someone all too familiar to Harry walks in and greets the orange haired guy. With wide eyes, Harry watches as Louis sits down next to the guy, a smile on his face, though even from afar Harry can tell how tired he looks. Harry wonders if the alpha didn't sleep well either over the past two weeks.

Harry wants to look away, doesn't want Louis to see him, not here, not with his friends, but he hasn't seen Louis in two weeks and- he's missed him. So, Harry stares and a few moments later, Louis' blue eyes shoot to him. They widen in recognition, then look behind Harry and turn into a mix between disgust and concern. Harry swallows and looks down. He feels bad and he doesn't even know why. 

In his peripheral vision, he notices Louis making a move to get up but to Harry's luck, at that moment the first round begins and the first question is being read, stopping Louis from getting over to him. 

Harry doesn't hear the question, or the five ones after that. He feels River's hand sliding even higher on his thigh, and feels his other hand coming to wrap around him as he starts to lean in, pressing kisses to Harry's throat. But Harry is in trance as he keeps staring at Louis. 

Eventually, the moderator calls a break and Harry is shaken out of his state as Louis gets up and Harry readies himself to be confronted with him any second but instead the alpha just storms outside, cigarette already in his mouth. The orange haired guy who sat next to Louis looks at Harry with disgust before following Louis. And Harry won't have that. He's not the bad guy in this story. 

“Stop it,” Harry says to River, trying to get up but the alpha’s hand tightens. “River, I’m being serious.” 

“Oh come on babe, let me have fun. You’re always so fucking uptight,” he mumbles and lets his teeth graze over Harry's bond mark. Harry whimpers and shakes his head as his senses are completely overwhelmed with the biting scent of peppermint that belongs to River. 

“Please River.” When he tries to get away again, River's grip becomes painful and Harry contemplates screaming for help since all his other friends just ignore what's clearly going on in front of them. Harry looks back to Louis' table but the alpha isn't back yet.

“Shut up and stop moving,” River growls in his alpha voice, paralysing Harry as a tear rolls down his face. He can't move or speak, can do nothing but cry and whimper as River sucks a bruise right beneath his bond mark. 

Harry's phone starts ringing where it's laying on the table in front of him and Harry squeezes his eyes together when he sees that it's Zayn who's calling him. Harry needs to pick up, needs to apologise to Zayn, needs to patch up what he destroyed. God he’s awful, he’s the worst friend so maybe he deserves this. Maybe he deserves these kinds of people in his life instead of Zayn, who will always listen to him, or Niall, who always has good advice and gives the best cuddles, or Louis, who makes Harry feel seen and heard. He doesn’t deserve them. 

The call ends but starts up again immediately and Harry’s eyes snap from his phone to the door over and over again while he feels River touch his panties. 

“I’ve always wanted this, you know?” He whispers in Harry’s ear and Harry whimpers, tries to shake his head but he can’t fucking move. 

“And it seems like you want it too.” River touches his panties where a wet spot has formed. Harry doesn’t want this, doesn’t like this, feels betrayed by his own body. The call ends and picks up again for the fourth time now and Harry knows something is up, knows something is wrong. 

“Let’s get out of here,” River says, pushing Harry out of the booth. Harry stumbles as he still can’t really move andwould fall if it weren’t for arms catching him. He cries harder when he smells the familiar scent of tea and cinnamon and he wants to let go, just wants to disappear. 

Louis' arms tighten around him and he grabs Harry’s phone from the table. 

“The fuck do you think you’re doing,” River snarls, making Harry whimper as he tries to fight the alpha voice still blocking him and buries himself closer to Louis. 

“He clearly is not consenting to this and you know how high the penalty for abusing your alpha voice is. Police will be here any second,” Louis says but Harry blends the rest out, letting himself fall into Louis and closing his eyes. He vaguely notices being carried somewhere and then he’s standing again but Louis luckily never lets go of him. 

“Harry, you’re fine. I promise you’re fine you just gotta snap out of it. You can do it, I know you can.” Harry whimpers and shakes his head. “Yes pup, you can. Come on,” Louis orders gently. “You’re your own person Harry, he cannot tell you what you can or can’t do. Focus on me, come back to me, omega.” 

Harry’s eyes snap open and he looks at Louis who’s staring intently at him. 

“You’re doing so good, can you talk?” He asks and Harry shakes his head. “Well not if you don’t try it.” The alpha smiles softly. “Try it for me.” 

Harry does. It’s hard, feels like his jaw is locked and his tongue is too heavy to move but he tries; tries and tries and tries until he can finally cry out the words he’s been meaning to say since he saw Louis walk into the pub. 

“I’m sorry, alpha.”

“It’s okay omega, did so good for me. Just stay with me.” Harry gives a small smile, happy to have pleased the alpha before he feels his legs give out underneath him and he falls into Louis arms once more. 

“Alright pup, I’ve got you,” Louis promises and Harry hums, his eyes blurred over and his limbs feeling heavy. Harry's phone starts to ring again at that moment. They both look down at it and it's once again Zayn. Louis accepts the call and puts him on speaker, except it's not Zayn who's talking. 

“H? Zayns gone into labour- I don’t… it’s way too fucking early, I don’t know what you do but he’s not been doing well ever since your fight and-” Harry doesnt hear the rest of Niall’s words as he lets out a whimper and the world turns dark. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Sometimes it feels like he's floating on clouds made of tea and cinnamon and during those times Harry feels good. He feels safe and warm and happy. But there are times where everything turns dark and cold and wet, where Harry feels restless and scared. He hates the dark place, and is so afraid of it because he can’t do anything against it. The times in the bad place always feel longer than the times in the good place. Harry loves the good place. It reminds him of Louis.

When Harry wakes up, he’s pulled from the good place. There’s tea and cinnamon and there is warmth. It's kind of like the good place except now he’s way more aware of his surroundings. Of the hand gently stroking his hair, the arm holding him close to a warm body. He tenses, panics for a moment but then there is tea and cinnamon and he is safe. There is a soft voice whispering sweet nothings into his ear. 

Harry falls asleep. 

The next time he wakes up, he feels hot but there's still someone playing with his hair and holding him tight. 

“Wake up omega,” a familiar voice says. 

Harry turns towards it and cuddles close to it. 

“Hi little pup.” Louis chuckles softly and Harry hums. “Come on love, I gotta get some food into you, you barely ate anything but biscuits the past few days and you need something real.”

Harry hums again, bunching Louis' shirt up to his nose. 

“You can have the shirt if you open your eyes for me,” Louis coaxes, tugging softly on one of Harry's curls. 

Slowly, Harry lifts his head away from where he has it buried in Louis' chest, just enough so he can blink his eyes open and look up at the alpha. Louis is smiling at him softly. The dim light in the room is gentle on Harry's eyes and he gives Louis a shy smile back. 

“Missed your eyes,” Louis mumbles, making Harry blush. He gets impatient after a few moments and tugs at the shirt Louis is wearing with a small frown. Louis laughs but sits up, causing Harry to slip off his chest where he was resting. Harry lets out a small unhappy growl.“Oi, stop complaining,” Louis says, handing Harry his shirt who immediately grabs it happily. 

It's then that he realises that they are in his nest, which is now full with Louis' clothes. Harry looks from the state of his nest to the alpha whose turn it is now to blush. 

“How about I make some food and explain what happened?” He asks, fiddling with his hair and Harry nods. “Alright pup.” Louis carefully gets up, Harry watching him with a frown. 

“Stay,” he whines and Louis sighs. 

“I can't make you food and stay with you here at the same time now, can I?” He asks and Harry frowns. He wants to be close to Louis. “You could come with me?” Louis offers and Harry smiles and nods.

He turns to his nest, carefully grabs a few shirts and jumpers and a sock that all belong to Louis before he gets up, smiling at the alpha bashfully. 

“Ready?” The alpha asks and Harry looks back once more. He quickly leans down, grabbing a stuffy before he nods at Louis. “Okay, come on.” Louis smiles and Harry is glad he’s not being judged. He’s sure that he couldn't handle it, not from Louis. 

Once in the kitchen, Harry manages to climb on the counter before he carefully places his assortment of clothing around him, building somewhat of a small nest and staring at Louis once he's done.

“Oh you did so good baby, so smart of you to bring your nest here,” Louis praises him and Harry preens. 

Harry lets out a yawn as he watches Louis start to gather ingredients for pancakes, happy when he's being handed little pieces of fruit every now and then, even happier when Louis praises him for eating them. 

There’s a cup of lavender tea cooling down for him that Louis prepared when the sweet smell of the first pancake hits their senses. 

“I don't know how much you remember pup, but basically, you dropped. Very deep and very long. It was three days, though you were sometimes out of it enough to eat a bit, and well the showering was a bit of a struggle because you didn't like being apart from me but we managed and I swear I didn't see anything or touched you in any way. We were at the pub when you dropped and I brought you here. I tried putting you in your bed because again, you did not like being apart from me but you wouldn't calm down on the bed so I put you in your nest but you didn't stop being restless until I laid down with you. Only then were you finally calm. I know you're mad at me but I needed you to get better. I- I would've gone to a hospital today if you wouldn't wake up but your scent changed into- well I realised you weren't down anymore, just asleep,” Louis explains. 

Harry tries to follow but his head still feels like it's floating on cinnamon clouds. So, he only hums and grabs another strawberry from the bowl of fruit Louis cut. 

“Cuddles?” He asks and Louis sighs and nods. 

“Yeah love, once you’ve eaten,” he promises and Harry smiles, content with that answer. He feels warm, would like to get rid of his pants but he doesn't want to ruin his nest and he knows if he would move now, he would ruin it and that would upset Louis which then would make him upset too. 

He sighs and Louis looks at him questioningly. Louis. Alpha. Harry wants cuddles. 

“Cuddles?” He asks again and the alpha chuckles but steps in between his legs. Harry hums happily and wraps his arms around Louis’ neck, happy that he’s not wearing a shirt so he can put his nose right into his scent gland, breathing in deeply before he starts licking over it. 

“Baby love, we can do that once we’ve eaten but I don't want to burn all the pancakes. Be good for me.” 

Harry whines but allows Louis to pull away from him. The alpha flicks his nose gently and hands him the tea that apparently has cooled down enough to satisfy the alpha. 

Harry is relieved when Louis is finally done with cooking, following the alpha to the sofa and quickly rebuilding the nest around both of them, frowning when he doesn't have enough pieces. 

“Hey, it's perfect. We can go back to the bigger one, once we’re done okay omega? Try and focus on eating.” 

Harry nods, he can do that. 

He ends up stealing most of the fruit from Louis' plate, sitting halfway in his lap because he did not like how far away they were sitting. 

“How’re you feeling pup?” Louis asks and Harry shrugs. 

“Warm. Cuddles now?” He asks and Louis nods. 

“Tell me when you feel hot, okay?” He asks and Harry hums. “Well then, cuddles now.” Louis stands up, managing to lift Harry with him who squeals and giggles in surprise, wrapping his legs and arms around the alpha. 

“Love cuddles,” he whispers, burying his head in Louis' neck as the alpha grabs all the clothes Harry brought from his nest. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Harry is in and out of sleep, content as long as he is with Louis though he’s getting more and more frustrated by the minute as he starts feeling hotter and hotter, becoming restless. He's squirmy atop of Louis and the alpha has reprimanded him more than once but Harry can't help it.

Sighing, Harry sits up and frowns. 

“M’hot,” he whines, still squirming until Louis hands snap to his hips to hold him still. 

“You’re going into heat,” the alpha says, stopping Harry's whining. He looks at Louis for a few beats before he slowly shakes his head. 

“N-no,” he stutters out, hands starting to shake. “No. No. No, no, no. Please,” he says and Louis squeezes his hips. 

“I know it's scary and I know it's been a long time but this is- this is good Harry.” 

“Y-you knew?” He asks confused, feeling betrayed. He wants to get up, wants to put space between him and the alpha. It's like the whole day he’s been in a warm, cosy bubble with the alpha and now Louis has kicked him out into ice cold water. 

“I suspected it could be your heat coming by your scent but I wasn’t entirely sure. Not until like thirty minutes ago,” Louis whispers. “H, you needed all the rest you could get.” 

“You lied. You took advantage of me,” Harry says and Louis sits up. 

“You know very well that I didn't do that. God H, you could’ve- do you know how deep you dropped? And then you slipped right into heat. You needed to rest before you ended up in the hospital. I'm just taking care of you.” 

“Fuck me through it,” Harry says. 

“What?” Louis snaps and Harry grinds down once against him. He watches Louis' eyes widen. 

“You heard me. Fuck me through it, alpha .” 

“No,” Louis says, lifting Harry off his lap. 

“Louis, please,” he whines. “I can’t- Just fucking do it.” 

“I don't want to,” the alpha says and Harry flinches. He didn't expect that . Not after the way Louis has been taking care of him for what- four days now?! He’s awful. 

Tears well up in Harry's eyes and he hides his face. “I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I didn't mean it. I'm just- I’m scared and I don't want to be alone. Please don't leave me alone!” 

“Harry, love. It's okay. It’ll be fine,” Louis says, carefully taking his hands from his face and Harry sniffs. 

“I’m so scared Lou,” he whispers and the alpha nods. 

“I know and that's okay. I can stay here until your first wave hits but I can't help you through it, okay?” 

Harry sniffs and nods, carefully climbing back into the alpha’s lap and making himself small. “I don't want to lose you.” 

“I’m still here, aren’t I?” Louis jokes but Harry shakes his head.

“I’d understand if you'd hate me.” 

“Oi, don't be silly. I could never hate you. And neither could Niall nor Zayn. They love you so much Harry.” And it hits Harry then, what happened shortly before he dropped.

“Oh god, Zayn? Is.. oh my god it's all my fault. I’m awful. Im so fucking awful is he- fuck is he okay?” Harry asks and Louis shushes him. 

“He’s okay. Has been asking for you ever since he woke up. The pup’s fine too. They’re fine and Zayn and Niall miss you, so you can’t panic, okay? You’re gonna get through your heat just fine and then you’re gonna go to your friends, okay? One thing after the other my love.”

Harry cries but nods, hiding in Louis' neck. 

“My uh- my last boyfriend took all my toys away,” Harry whispers eventually. He can feel himself getting slicker with every passing minute. “He uhm… He said I didn't need them, and well, then I actually didn't so I never bothered with buying any and-” 

“I’ll get you some later,” Louis says and Harry nods. 

“Thank you.” 

Another 30 minutes pass before Louis carefully pulls Harry out of his lap and gives him a gentle kiss to the forehead when Harry starts whining and begging him to stay. 

After that, everything's sort of a blur. He knows Louis comes in between waves, makes him change and shower and eat and drink, takes away the first layer of his nest, the one that's soaked through with slick and come and changes it out with new, worn clothes that smell so heavily of tea and cinnamon it sends Harry straight into the next wave. 

He doesn't know how much time passes but he wakes up eventually, not feeling like he’ll burn alive if he doesn’t get to come soon. He’s exhausted but he's clean, is wearing fresh clothes and laying in a fresh nest, and there's cool water and fresh fruit next to him, and he knows he’s got Louis to thank for all of that. 

He gets up with his bones aching and steps outside. Louis is laying on the sofa, asleep, and Harry curls up to him. 

“Hi pup,” the alpha whispers and Harry presses himself closer. 

“Niall and Zayn?” He asks already halfway asleep again and Louis hums. 

“Tomorrow, I promise.” 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Harry is so full of anxiety that even the reassuring and scenting  from Louis didn’t manage to calm him down. Harry has managed to convince Louis to spend the night in his bed with him, the thought of being alone too much for him to handle in his vulnerable state, especially when he's got an alpha who is willing to cuddle him whenever he asks for it. Harry wanted to sleep in his nest but Louis refused, which Harry didn’t quite understand given how much time the alpha has already spent in it and how much of the nest already consists of his scent.

It’s raining and Harry is wearing one of Louis jumpers, quiet music playing in the background. Harry’s hands are shaking so he hides them in the sleeves of his jumper. 

“What if they hate me?” Harry whispers as Louis starts his car. 

“They don’t,” Louis says. 

“How would you know?” Harry snaps and sighs. “I'm sorry.” 

“It's fine. You know, when I told them what happened to you they were so concerned, Zayn wanted to come over here. Said the pup will be fine having a sleepover at yours because they gotta get used to it anyway. He loves you Harry.” 

“He deserves an apology.” 

“Yeah, and so do you.” 

“Do I? I’ve been so mean to everyone. I mean I got mad at you over… nothing. Because I'm a coward.”

“We can talk about us once you are not so heavily dependent on my scent. As for Zayn and Niall, I promise they don’t hate you and they don't think less of you just because of a fight. Friends fight.” 

“Happy thoughts?” Harry asks, looking at Louis who sits up straighter. 

“Alright,” he says. “Let’s see…I like when the sun shines through your curtains after you just woke up from a midday nap. I like driving down empty streets screaming the lyrics to Adele songs and pretending I've written them for past lovers.” Harry giggles at that and the alpha looks to him shortly, spotting a shy smile. “I like holding you when you sleep.” 

Harry swallows and stares at the alpha but Louis doesn't look back. 

“I uhm… I like the sound of rain on my windows and I like the smell of soup after a cold day spent outside and- and I like it when you hold me,” Harry whispers the last part. 

“Happy thoughts,” Louis mumbles. 

“Happy thoughts,” Harry echoes, voice barely above a whisper. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Niall has texted Louis their room number so they quietly make their way up the floor, Louis’ hand resting comfortingly on the small of Harry's back. 

Harry takes a deep breath when they find the door and looks at Louis who gives him a soft smile before he knocks. A few seconds later, a tired looking Niall opens the door and they are met with the view of an even more exhausted Zayn laying in the hospital bed surrounded by cables and monitors and Harry crumbles. 

Louis wraps his arms around Harry's waist and carefully leads them inside as Harry cries, apologies spilling from his lips as all the guilt comes rushing back. 

“Oh Harry. C’mere petal.” Zayn pats the space next to him and Harry whimpers. Louis lets go of him and Harry ever so carefully lays down next to Zayn, mindful of the cables. Harry keeps apologising over and over again until Zayn shushes him and pulls him close. 

“I'm sorry too, petal, but all's forgiven. It wasn't your fault Harry. I promise you, it wasn’t your fault.” 

“How about I get the little sprout now?” Niall asks and Harry can feel Zayn nod. 

“You’ve had some crazy days too, didn’t you, petal?” Zayn asks him and Harry looks to Louis and nods. 

“Yeah,” He mumbles. 

“You gonna be okay?”

“Always.” Harry shrugs. “You’re a mum now,” he whispers, grinning up at Zayn. “Are you gonna be okay?” 

“Honestly? I don’t fucking know,” Zayn chuckles, though it sounds a bit frantic. 

“Hey now, you're gonna be the best mum. Took care of me for four years and I turned out quite alright,” Harry says and Zayn nods. 

“Yeah I just- I'm kind of bound to this bed and sprout is bound to their bed but the doctors said Ni and the pup can go home in a week or two. They’re not sure I’ll be released during the same time and- how am I supposed to be a mum when I can’t even carry my pup?”

Harry gently squeezes Zayn's hand, looking into his tear-filled eyes with compassion and reassurance.

“Those are all things that don’t determine whether you're a good mum or not. Being a mum - being a parent - is all about how much love you have for your children. Whether you can physically carry them or not doesn't change the immense amount of care and affection you have to give. A good parent is one who shows unconditional love, always making sure their child feels safe, valued, and heard. It's about being there emotionally, providing comfort and understanding, and guiding them with patience and kindness. Your presence, your voice, your love—they all have a profound impact. A parent’s love isn't measured by their physical ability to carry their child, but by the endless ways they support and love them. You have already shown so much strength and love, and those are the true marks of a wonderful parent. Your pup will feel your love and care, whether you're holding them in your arms or not. Trust in your bond and the love you share. Harry pauses. “You are an amazing mum, Zayn. And you two are gonna make amazing parents. Never doubt that.”

“Thank you, Harry,” Zayn sniffs and Harry smiles at him, looking at Louis who puts his hand on his shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. Harry rests his head against the alpha’s arm and looks back to Zayn who is watching them silently, a smile on his face.

The door opens again and Niall comes in followed by a nurse who is pushing a small incubator. 

“Petal, Louis, meet sprout,” he says, the nurse pushing the baby towards them.

“Please don’t tell me you named your child sprout.” Harry sniffs, looking at Zayn and Niall who share a look over Harry's head. “Guys?” Harry asks. 

“Well only as a middle name,” Niall says, making Harry giggle. 

“This is so unserious, the poor pup,” he laughs. “I love it.” 

“What's their first name then?” Louis asks.

“Meet Milo Sprout Horan Malik.” 

“You named him my lil’ sprout?” Harry asks, confused. It’s what he used to call the pup. The other three all laugh, making Harry frown. 

“It’s Milo with an o, love,” Louis explains and Harry bites his lips. 

“Oh,” he mumbles. “Right.” 

“We owe you a lot H and you’re family. It always sounded like Milo when you called him your little sprout and at first we just used it jokingly but it kind of stuck and suddenly no other name was fit for our pup.” 

“He's the cutest pup I’ve ever seen.” Harry sniffs, squeezing Zayn's hand once more. “He's perfect.” 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

They quietly make their way up the stairs leading to their apartments. Louis made the quick decision they should get pizza for dinner so they’re each carrying a box. Harry is tired, exhausted from everything that happened over the course of the last week. 

They arrive at their doors and Harry frowns when Louis goes towards his own door. “Are you not- did I do something wrong?” He asks and Louis shakes his head. 

“No, I just thought you needed some time alone.” 

“Oh. Do you want time alone?” He retorts and Louis shakes his head. “Okay,” Harry says and unlocks his door, the alpha following close behind. 

Harry lights candles before he goes to grab wine glasses. 

“Wine?” he asks Louis, who is opening the balcony door.

“Not for me,” he says, and Harry nods, only grabbing one glass. He opens the bottle, ready to pour himself a glass; he craves it after everything that happened. Instead of pouring himself a glass, though, Harry pours the wine down the sink and opts for water for himself and a can of Coke for Louis. He spent the last couple of years partying and drinking, waking up with a massive headache and hangovers the next days, and Harry doesn’t want that life anymore. He is ready to move on and face his fears and issues without drowning them in alcohol.

“You could’ve had the wine,” Louis says when Harry gets outside. 

“No. I’m fine.” Harry smiles. He grabs a blanket and sits down close to Louis. It’ll probably be one of the last pleasant evenings before autumn takes over. As much as Harry loves summer, he is just as excited for autumn. 

“We should talk,” Louis says and Harry hums. 

“I know. I’m just- can we just be for now? I like how it is right now and… I need time to… think. Yeah. I need time to think about a lot of things and I know this is one of them but I’m just asking for a bit of time.”

“Promise me you’ll come to me though. Whatever conclusion you come to, don't hesitate to tell me,” the alpha says. 

“I promise.” Harry nods, giggling when the alpha holds up his pinky. Harry intertwines his own pinky with him, his giggles turn into a smile. “Can we still cuddle?” He asks, dropping their hands but not letting go. 

“I’m always down for a cuddle just- maybe just without the scenting and sleepovers, yeah?” Louis asks and Harry nods. 

“Yeah.”

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Since the weather has become colder, Harry has spent less time on his balcony, meaning he runs into his neighbour far less often. They make up for it though, with movie nights and rainy Sundays spent inside, listening to vinyl and playing board games. Louis has been patient with him. Harry knows so because it's been three weeks since their talk on the balcony. Three weeks of cuddles and gentle touches and sweet glances. Three weeks of Harry laying awake at night, barely able to sleep because his mind is running 100 miles per hour. 

He knows he trusts Louis, is very aware that his omega is attracted to the alpha and longs to always be close to him. And yet, Harry is afraid to give in to that. It feels too cliché, like everything he’s against; the little omega all helpless until the strong alpha comes and saves them. Harry is adamant that he doesn’t need an alpha and yet the summer has proved him the opposite. Without Louis, he’d probably be miserable and in the hospital right now. 

And Louis was never pushy about it either, only ever took care of Harry as much as Harry allowed it, he respected his space and his feelings and his concerns. He listened to Harry, sometimes even knew what Harry needed before he knew himself. 

Harry sighs and curls himself into a ball. He has dropped all contact from his other friends, blocked them on all sorts of platforms, and now he only has Zayn and Niall and Louis left. And he doesn't want to lose Louis too, not when he’s the first alpha Harry feels like he can trust after the way his old friends and partners have treated him. Louis is the first alpha Harry felt genuinely comfortable with, even more so than with Niall. 

At 5 am, Harry gets up and prepares breakfast and 40 minutes later, he’s knocking on Louis' door. The alpha answers, only wearing underpants and looking positively panicked. There are pillow lines on his face and his hair’s a mess and Harry feels bad for a moment but he's way too strung up with nerves to think about it. 

“Harry? Are you okay?” Louis asks, looking him up and down. 

“Yeah.” Harry walks past him. “I made breakfast.” 

“It's what? 5 am?” 

“Almost 6 now, I couldn't sleep,” Harry says, making his way into Louis' living area. He hears the front door fall shut and sets the tray down on the coffee table. “I made tea,” he says when Louis walks towards him, pulling on a hoodie. 

“Babe,” Louis says. “As much as I appreciate it, it's 6 am. We should both be asleep right now. Did you- Did you bake the cookies?” 

“Oh, yeah I did. D’you want one?” 

Louis sighs and nods. “Tea and one cookie and then we are going to take a nap.” 

“I thought we weren't supposed to share a bed anymore,” Harry yaps and Louis glares at him. “And what about the eggs and pancakes and-” 

“Harry, I swear I’m gonna eat all of this once I’ve slept some more.”

“Even when it's all cold and dry and the pancakes are soggy from the maple syrup?” 

“Even then.” 

“Okay. But just so you know, I came over to talk.” 

“Talk?” Louis yawns. “Talk about what?” 

“Oh uhm- well us.” Harry shrugs. 

“Okay, cookie, tea, and talking now,” Louis says, rubbing his eyes as Harry grins. 

“I like you,” Harry begins slowly, his voice tinged with nervousness but filled with sincerity. “I like you a lot as a friend, but... there's more to it.” He takes a deep breath, his eyes locking onto Louis’. “My omega is attracted to you. At first, I thought it was just because you were there when I dropped. You took care of us, and I figured that’s why it felt attached to you. But it’s been three weeks now, and I can’t stop thinking about you.”

Harry swallows hard, his fingers fidgeting before continuing on. “I’ve always told myself I didn't need an alpha. I tried so hard to prove that, to be independent and strong on my own. But in doing so, I didn’t realise how much you were already helping me. You never gloated about it or expected anything in return—you just did it out of the kindness of your heart. Those first few times we talked, you were just there for me, and I’m not sure you realise how much that meant to me.” He pauses, his voice growing softer and more vulnerable. “Your support and presence- it made me feel safe and valued in a way I hadn’t felt in a long time. I can’t remember the last time I felt so safe by someone who is not Niall or Zayn.”

Harry takes a deep breath. “What I’m trying to say is, I’d be open to you courting me, or us going on a date. Whatever you want. If you even want me at all.” His eyes search Louis’, hope and fear mingling in their depths. “I just... I need you to know how much you mean to me, and how much I’d like to see where this could go.”

“Really?” Louis asks, sounding way more awake now, a big grin on his lips and Harry nods. 

“Just- just promise me you won’t get mad if I panic that we are making a mistake. I just tend to overthink and sometimes I get lost in it and if either one of us realises this doesn't work, promise me we’ll try everything to stay friends. Because I can’t lose you Louis.”

“I promise you, pup. We’re gonna be the best at communication and I’m gonna court the shit out of you.” 

Harry giggles and shakes his head. “You don't really have to court me. I'm fine with normal dates. No one has ever courted me anyway.” 

Louis studies his face for a few moments. “Baby, you deserve to get courted and I’m gonna do everything I can to make it the best experience.” 

“I’d like that,” Harry admits quietly and Louis smiles softly at him. “But I mean it. You’ve basically already courted me the past few months even if it wasn’t intentional, it could be classified as that and I just want us to keep going the way we are right now. Do things together and instead of it just being us as friends, it’s now with the intention of it being dates maybe? It sounds stupid but I don’t want to give up cuddling or holding hands just because it’s not proper courting etiquette.” 

“I see,” Louis says, pondering his words for a moment. “I mean I'm willing to do whatever you want and I can admit that it looked like I was courting you even if it wasn’t what I intended but maybe my alpha did. That also means we’re just really far along with the courting and I can continue doing it,” Louis says, turning Harry's face three shades of red when he kisses his nose. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

“I’ve got something for you,” Harry says a few weeks later. It's raining and Harry can't remember a day where it wasn’t absolutely pouring outside over the past week. They’ve been cooped up inside their flats, spending time just talking and watching tv shows when they don’t have to work. Since Louis has to leave his flat to go to work, he was kind enough to also do the grocery shopping for Harry and Harry made sure to always greet him with a warm cup of tea and some freshly baked goods when the alpha came back soaked through from the rain. 

“Oh, what is it?” Louis asks curiously. Harry's flat is painted in a warm glow from all his pumpkin and vanilla scented candles and his strings of fairy lights, making the alpha’s features look endlessly soft. 

“Well you know how you said that I stole all your jumpers?” Harry asks, worrying his bottom lip and Louis hums. 

“I also remember saying it in a joking manner and then telling you over and over again that I do not mind one bit and find it rather adorable when I get home to you wearing one of them,” Louis says. 

“I also put them in my nest,” Harry mumbles with a blush and Louis smiles pleased, sitting up a bit straighter. 

“Yeah, that part might be my favourite.”

“Anyway, so I felt kinda bad so I made you this.” Harry hands Louis the bag he’s been holding behind his back and watches him nervously. 

“You made me something?” Louis asks and Harry nods. 

The alpha smiles and carefully opens the bag, pulling out the jumper Harry knit him. He spent days on it, lost sleep because he wanted to get it done as quickly as possible. It's dark green with a bright orange pumpkin on it and suddenly Harry feels silly. Louis wears black and bandshirts and listens to heavy metal and rock when Harry’s not around and Harry makes him a jumper with a pumpkin . His cheeks burn red and he reaches out to grab the jumper from Louis but the alpha is clutching it to his chest. 

“I love it so much,” Louis says. “And you scented it too, didn’t you?” He asks and Harry nods bashfully. 

“I wanted to promise you to never steal it from you except to re-scent it if you’d want that. I- uhm… I sleep better with your scent, the best when it's in your arms but- yeah i don't know. I thought… I don’t know what I thought to be honest.” 

“Come here pup,” Louis says and Harry easily slides into his lap, the jumper between them. “I don’t want you to always second guess your every move when it comes to me. You know me . You know my likes and my dislikes and you know…” Louis pauses, his voice softening as he wraps his arms around Harry, holding him close. “You know how much you mean to me. I want you to feel confident and secure with me. Your scent, your presence—it’s comforting to me, too. You don't have to worry about overstepping or doing something wrong. We're figuring this out together.”

Harry cuddles deeper into Louis' embrace, feeling the warmth and reassurance radiating from him. “Thank you, Louis. I just... I want to do things right by you. I’ve been in relationships before but never… It never felt like this. It never meant so much and I just don’t want to fuck things up.”

Louis presses a gentle kiss to Harry’s forehead. “Love, just be yourself. That’s all I’ve ever wanted. We’ll take this one step at a time, and we’ll make it work. Together.”

Harry smiles, his worries easing away as he breathes in Louis' calming scent. “Together,” he echoes. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Harry is wearing tights and boots, a plaid skirt, and a wool jumper with a little backpack on that holds all his things as he opens the door for Louis, grinning when he’s met with a huge bouquet of flowers. Harry giggles and takes them. 

“Thank you.” He blushes. “I’m quickly gonna put them in some water,” he says before turning and rushing back inside. He ran out of vases the previous day. Arguably, he only owns two but still, that's the third bouquet of flowers that Louis has gifted him now and Harry blushes every time he walks past them.

He quickly makes his way back to Louis, grinning like a fool when he sees the jumper he’s wearing and falling into his arms, giddiness overcoming him. 

“You’re wearing my jumper,” he squeals and Louis hums, wrapping his arms around Harry's waist and pulling him close, causing Harry to rise on his tippy toes.

“It's my new favourite. Lius and Evie were very jealous and my sisters too by the way,” Louis tells him, letting go of him to intertwine their hands. 

“Really?” Harry asks and Louis nods. 

“Yeah.” 

“Oh you have to get me their sizes so I can knit jumpers for all of them!” Harry pleads, the alpha laughing but nodding. 

“Alright, my love,” he promises, pulling Harry's hand to his lip and pressing a kiss to it.

“So, where are we going?” Harry asks once they are sitting in the car. All he knew was that they were gonna be outside.

“You’ll see. It's nothing too exciting. I just thought it could be a cute activity,” Louis explains, handing Harry his phone with Sspotify already opened. Harry searches through Louis playlists. He freezes when he sees one that's titled H and he quickly shuffles the playlist beneath that before he goes back. He scrolls through the playlist slowly, recognising all the songs as either his favourite or ones he has the albums on vinyl, playing them whenever he and Louis were playing board games. They're all in there, even songs Harry just mentioned off handedly that he likes or soundtracks from his favourite movies. Harry's heart is beating quickly in his chest and his cheeks turn a dark red. He looks up from the phone to Louis who is mouthing the lyrics to Silver Springs by Stevie Nicks and it's in that moment that he realises he might actually be in love with the alpha.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

They're a bit outside of London when Louis stops his car. There in front of them is a big pumpkin patch, a corn maze, and a small harvest festival. It looks straight out of a movie and Harry could not be happier. Louis has a protective arm slung around his waist as they walk through the pumpkin patch, with hot fall themed beverages clasped in their hands. 

“Can I try yours?” Harry asks and Louis nods, offering his cup to Harry. 

“‘Course.” Louis’ got a maple cinnamon latte and Harry takes a sip, mindful of how hot it is. Louis takes Harry's drink from his hands, taking a sip of his gingerbread matcha latte. Louis scrunches nose and pulls the corners of his mouth down.

“Yours is so much better than mine.” Harry pouts but goes to hand Louis his drink back. 

“You can keep it,” the alpha says and Harry shakes his head. 

“You clearly hate mine, it's fine, really.” 

“No. I like yours actually. C’mon, let me do this for you. I want today to be perfect.” 

“It already is,” Harry promises but keeps the drink. 

“We should pick some out, carve them for halloween. Also I want some edible ones so I can make, like, all the pumpkin recipes,” Harry says, crouching down in front of one of the big orange decorative ones. 

“ All the pumpkin recipes?” Louis asks with a teasing lilt and Harry gets up and nods. He wraps his arms around Louis' neck, wanting to feel close. The alpha immediately wraps his own around Harry's waist. 

“Yeah, all of them. Pumpkin soup and pumpkin pie and pumpkin bread and stuffed pumpkin and pumpkin spice lattes and- did I mention soup ?” 

“You did,” Louis chuckles. 

“Well then I also want to make pumpkin hummus and pumpkin cookies. All the pumpkin recipes.”

“And do I get to try them all?” Louis asks and Harry grins. 

“You’d want to?” Harry asks, surprised, warmth filling his chest.

“Of course I want to! I love your cooking.” 

“Can also make pumpkin pancakes and pumpkin french toast.”

“I’m gonna try it all. Let's pick out some pumpkins then,” Louis says, bumping his nose against Harrys once before he spins Harry around so that he’s facing forward and pulls him close to him again. 

They end up with two big pumpkins and two smaller ones for them to carve, planning on doing it with Cornelius and Evie when they spend the Saturday before Halloween at Louis’. They also choose a few smaller ones to decorate Harry's windowsills and pretty much every other free space he still has left before Harry picks out five edible ones. They get a wheelbarrow for all of the pumpkins so they can bring them to the car.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

The sun is beginning to set, casting a golden glow over the sprawling corn maze. The tall stalks rustle gently in the breeze, creating a serene and almost magical atmosphere. Harry and Louis stand at the entrance, map in hand, ready to find their way through the maze. 

“Alright,” Louis says with a grin, handing Harry the map. “Lead the way.”

Harry giggles. “If we get lost it's not my fault.”

They set off into the maze, the tall corn enveloping them almost immediately. Harry holds the map out in front of him, squinting at the intricate pathways. Louis walks close beside him, occasionally brushing his hand against Harry’s, sending small shivers of excitement down Harry’s spine. 

As they turn corners and choose paths at random, the sound of their laughter fills the air. “I think we’ve passed this same scarecrow three times already,” Louis joked, pointing to a particularly familiar-looking scarecrow dressed in old overalls and a floppy hat.

Harry shakes his head, his eyes twinkling with amusement. “Maybe it’s following us. Or maybe you’re just bad luck.”

“Hey now!” Louis protests playfully. “I’m excellent company in a maze. I keep things interesting.”

Harry stops to face him, a playful smirk on his lips. “Interesting, huh? Prove it.”

Louis grins and thinks for a moment. “Alright, how about this: we’ll race to the next turn, and whoever loses has to make breakfast tomorrow morning.”

Harry laughs and shakes his head. “You’re on!”

They take off running, their laughter echoing through the maze. Louis reaches the turn just a split second before Harry, triumphantly raising his arms. “Looks like you owe me breakfast.” 

“Was gonna make it anyway,” He says, sticking his tongue out to the alpha. Louis rolls his eyes good-naturedly and wraps his arm around Harry. 

“I know,” he says, rubbing his nose against Harry's jaw and making his breath hitch. 

They continue on, occasionally backtracking and making wild guesses at which direction to go. Every so often, they come across a deadend and Louis dramatically groans, throwing his head back in mock despair, making Harry laugh uncontrollably. Kids run past them from all directions, confusing them even more.

As the sky turns a deeper shade of orange, Harry finally spots a sign pointing towards the exit. “I think we’re almost there!” he exclaims, excitement in his voice.

They quicken their pace, and sure enough, a few turns later, they emerge from the maze, greeted by the sight of the open field and the sound of other people milling about.

“We did it!” Harry cheers, turning in Louis’ arms with a triumphant smile.

Louis beams back at him, pulling him into a tight hug. “Told you we’d make it out,” he says, his voice warm and full of affection. “And I had the best time getting lost with you.”

Harry cuddles himself close. “Me too, Lou. Though I genuinely hope we never actually get lost somewhere.”

They stand there for a moment, wrapped up in each other and Harry could probably stay here forever if it weren't for his stomach grumbling. 

“Let's get you something to eat, pup,” he says, leading Harry towards the market. It's full of small business owners selling their products and fall themed food stands. It's a bit crowded and Harry is grateful for Louis' hands that are resting on his hips and how he shields him with his body, letting him walk slightly in front. He's doing better in crowds, doesn't get as dizzy anymore, but the anxious feeling is still there and even though he never told Louis, the alpha must’ve picked up on it on his own. 

Harry forgets all about his empty stomach as they make it from stand to stand, looking at jewellery and art and all kinds of little knick knacks. “Maybe I should look for a market stand in London? I could sell some of my knitted things?” Harry asks as they come across a stand selling different kinds of jams made from a sheltered workshop. 

“Sounds like a plan, love. Oh, thank you,” Louis says, accepting the piece of white bread with fig cinnamon jam. He bites half of it off before feeding the other half to Harry. They share a smile 

“Thank you,” Harry says, accepting the brown paper bag as Louis signs "thank you" to the vendor. Harry looks back at him, mouth open in surprise.

“You know sign language?” Harry asks once they are a bit further away, trying not to sound too shocked but failing miserably.

“Yeah, kinda comes with the job.” Louis shrugs, and Harry shakes his head in amazement.

“You're unbelievable. I need to know every little detail about you. Do I even know you?” Harry asks, his curiosity piqued. 

Louis rolls his eyes, flicking Harry's nose playfully. “You're a dramatic baby. You know plenty about me, it just has never come up, I suppose. And we’ve got all the time in the world to learn each other inside out because I kinda want to know every little detail about you too,” Louis reassures him, and Harry grins, humming happily.

They keep strolling from booth to booth, pointing out things they see and chatting with some of the vendors until they come across a jewellery stand where an elderly man is selling necklaces. Harry spots a beautiful gold strand adorned with seawater pearls and carefully picks it up.

“It’s beautiful,” he breathes out, leaning slightly against Louis' chest.

“It is, isn’t it?” the man says, and Harry nods. “It’s one of the last things my mate made before he passed away. I tried to keep his business going, to let him live on through his work, but I don’t have the same talent for it. He lived for making jewellery; he had a real gift.”

Harry chokes up at those words. “You should keep it,” he says, but the man shakes his head.

“I’ve kept so many things of his that mean so much more to me. This piece deserves an owner who loves it as much as he did.”

“I’d love to have it,” Harry says softly, and the man nods, carefully packing the necklace. He looks up at Harry and Louis with a warm smile before looking back down.

Suddenly, the man's smile falters. “On second thought, I’m not sure I can let go of it yet. I- I’m so sorry. It's just so fresh.”

“Oh no, no, don’t worry about it. I totally understand. Thank you for sharing your story with us,” Harry says, trying to swallow down his tears. He can't imagine what it feels like to lose your mate.

“Yeah,” Louis adds. “We appreciate it. Thank you.”

They move on, and Harry finds a little baby jumper with a sprout on it, deciding to get it for Zayn and Niall. Eventually, they arrive at the food stalls.

“God, I’m dying,” Harry says, and Louis chuckles.

“What do you want, my love?” Louis asks. Harry shrugs.

“Everything.”

“Alright, how about you find us a table and I’ll go get us some food?”

“Okay,” Harry says, though he makes no move to leave the comfort of Louis' arms.

“Will you be fine on your own, or would you rather we go home? It's been a long day, pup,” Louis asks, concerned.

Harry shakes his head. “M’fine. I just… feel happy. I'm really happy right now.”

“Yeah?” Louis asks, and Harry nods.

“Yeah.” He steps away from Louis reluctantly. “I'll find us the best seats.”

“Alright, darling, I'll be quick,” Louis promises.

Harry watches Louis walk away, feeling a swell of gratitude and love. He finds a cosy table under a large tree lit up by lanterns and fairy lights and sits down. The evening is perfect, the whole day was. Live music is playing in the background and Harry can’t remember a time he felt so content.

When Louis returns, arms laden with food, Harry's smile widens. They settle in together, enjoying their meal and the simple joy of each other's company, feeding each other bites of food as they sit close. He knows they must look like a couple but Harry finds that he doesn't mind, quite the opposite, he finds himself scooting closer to Louis when he notices a group of omegas staring at him. If Louis notices it, he doesn’t let it show but Harry preens when he holds his hand atop the table. 

The ride home is long enough that Harry falls asleep and Louis wakes him up gently once they're home. Harry almost cries when he remembers all of the pumpkins, the thought of having to carry them too much for his sleep ridden mind. “I’ll take care of them tomorrow, don't worry,” Louis promises, pulling Harry up the stairs by his hand. 

“Stay?” Harry asks when they’re in front of his door. “You promised me breakfast too. Please?” 

“Alright, but not in your nest,” Louis gives in easily.

“Why not? It's way more comfy than the bed,” Harry whines. 

“It feels- you’ve never properly invited me in. When it was your drop I just wanted to take care of you and get you better again and then you had your preheat and it was also different but… It's very annoying traditional alpha of me, but you never invited me in and I don't want you to do it now. I want you to do it when you really want it. When you want me to see it. It's stupid.” 

“It's cute,” Harry argues. “I get it. I think.” 

“Okay, thank you pup.” 

They fall asleep cuddled close together and when Harry wakes up it's surrounded by all the pumpkins they bought the previous day and a slightly sweaty, panting Louis laying next to him. 

“You’re insane,” Harry giggles, bumping his nose into Louis' red cheek. 

“I walked the stairs 14 times, you better start on all the pumpkin food right now before I pass out.” 

“Got it, I’ll make breakfast right away.” Harry laughs. He puts on Louis’ pumpkin jumper that the alpha took off the previous night, happy when it smells heavily of him. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Harry is just putting on his cat ears when there is a knock on his door. He gives himself one last look over, twisting and turning in the mirror to make sure he looks alright. He put on a black, slightly bigger jumper and is wearing black leggings as well as one white and one black wool sock. To top it all off, he painted his nose black and put on the cat ears. 

It’s Halloween and he and Louis have decided to stay inside, cook dinner together and watch some movies. Harry is beyond excited. He slides to the door and opens it. 

“Trick or treat?” Louis asks with a grin, wearing devil horns on his own head. 

“You being here is definitely a treat,” Harry says, pulling the alpha in and hugging him close.

Louis laughs, returning the hug warmly. “Well, you look absolutely adorable, kitten.”

Harry grins, a blush creeping up his cheeks. “And you look devilishly handsome.”

They move into the kitchen where Harry has already started to prepare some things. 

“So, what's on the menu tonight?” Louis asks, pulling the sleeves of his jumper up his arms. Harry traces the tattooed skin with his eyes, fascinated by them every time even though he has more than he can count himself. 

“Pup?” Louis asks, pulling Harry out of his thoughts. His head snaps back up and he hums. 

“Yeah?” He asks and Louis smirks. 

“What are we making?” Louis repeats, making Harry blush. 

“Right uhm- I was thinking pumpkin soup and then some pumpkin curry and for dessert some pumpkin cookies and then popcorn for the movies, which we still have to pick, by the way, and I’m down for anything except horror movies.” 

“Yeah I agree,” Louis says, accepting the cutting board and knife Harry hands him. 

He starts cutting some more vegetables for the curry while Harry starts on the soup. Music is playing in the background and it reminds Harry of the playlist in Louis‘ phone titled H. He hasn’t brought it up to the alpha, not even sure what to say except coo over how adorable it is. 

Soon enough, the soup is cooking and Harry starts gathering the ingredients for the cookies, lightly singing along to the song that’s playing. He smiles when Louis wraps his arms around his waist and rests his chin on his shoulder. 

“What now?” Louis asks and Harry lightly sways his hips. 

“Just stay here,” He mumbles. 

“Always,” Louis promises, pressing his nose into the skin beneath Harry’s ear once. 

Dinner takes longer to make as they share stories, and Louis is adamant on making Harry laugh so hard his stomach starts hurting, plus they do everything together instead of distributing the tasks. But eventually, dinner is served and they cuddle close on the sofa after Harry admitted he finds the dinner table too formal. 

Harry has his legs thrown over Louis' lap, dipping the cookies into oat milk as they try to find a movie to watch. 

“Edward Scissorhands?” Louis suggests and Harry shakes his head. 

“Always scared me.” 

“Ohh the notebook?” Harry asks when they come across the movie. 

“Do you really want us both to cry?” 

“No,” Harry giggles, shaking his head and letting his legs fall against Louis' chest. He hums happily when Louis rests his hand on his shin, the other resting in his knees to control the remote. 

They end up watching the first Twilight movie, since Harry is shocked that Louis admits he’s never seen it.  

“It’s iconic,” Harry promises, jumping up to make popcorn. Louis follows him, wrapping his arms around him again. 

“I also kind of bought every Halloween inspired snack I could find yesterday. I went a bit overboard with it,” Harry admits, preparing a tray. “D’you want tea or hot chocolate?” He asks and Louis shrugs. 

“Whatever you’re having.”

“Hot chocolate then.” Harry grins. 

Louis takes care of the popcorn while Harry makes their drinks and soon enough, they’re on the sofa again, the movie starting to play as Louis holds Harry close. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

“The movie was awful. I loved it.” Louis grins, making Harry giggle and nod. 

“Yeah it's awesome,” Harry says. 

“Definitely team Edward though.” 

“Obviously,” Harry huffs, looking up at Louis, finding him already looking back. He bites his bottom lip, giving the alpha a shy smile. 

Louis grins, his eyes softening as he looks at Harry. "You're adorable, you know that?"

Harry blushes and laughs softly. "Shut up."

Louis leans in, his voice a gentle whisper. "Never."

Harry's heart skips a beat as Louis slowly closes the distance between them. He hesitates for a moment, their breaths mingling, before softly pressing his lips to Harry's in a tender, tentative kiss. The touch is light, almost feather-soft, yet it sends a shiver down Harry's spine. Harry closes his eyes and kisses him back, moving his lips against the alpha’s as fireworks explode in his chest. 

When they pull back, Harry's cheeks are flushed, and he gazes up at Louis with shining eyes. Louis smiles, his thumb brushing gently over Harry's cheek. "Happy Halloween, kitten."

"Happy Halloween, Lou," Harry murmurs, leaning in to rest his forehead against Louis'. They stay like that for a moment, basking in the warmth of each other's presence, feeling perfectly content and safe in each other's arms.

“Come with me?” Harry asks, getting up and holding his hand out to Louis. Louis hesitates but then grabs it, allowing Harry to pull him up.

“Pup, I don’t—” Louis starts to protest as Harry pulls him toward his bedroom, but Harry shushes him gently.

“Trust me?” Harry asks, and Louis nods.

“Of course, always, but—”

“Good.” Harry quickly presses a soft kiss to Louis' lips before turning around and opening his bedroom door. Inside, the room is softly illuminated by fairy lights and flickering fake candles, casting warm shadows on the walls. He pulls Louis further in before taking a deep breath and turning to face him.

“I… I built a nest for you,” Harry whispers, his voice unsure. “It’s completely new and has our scents, and I made it blue because it reminds me of your eyes. And you know how I always felt uncomfortable in my nests? Well, this is the first one I made that is comforting to me because it has your scent and- well anyway, I hope you like it.”

Louis steps closer to the nest, his throat tightening with emotion. “You built this for me?” he asks, his voice thick.

“For us, but with you in mind. I wanted it to be perfect for you. Because… because I think I love you.” Harry’s voice is barely audible, and he looks down, his heart pounding.

Louis’ head snaps up to look at Harry, making him squirm under the intense gaze. 

“I’ve never felt like this for anyone. It’s… it’s all pretty new to me, but if this is what love is supposed to feel like, then… then I don’t ever want to stop loving you.”

Louis closes the distance between them in two strides, pulling Harry into a gentle embrace. “I love you too, pup,” he murmurs. “More than anything.”

Harry smiles, wrapping his arms around Louis' neck. They stand there for a moment, wrapped in each other’s warmth, before Louis gently guides Harry to the nest. 

“Thank you for this,” Louis whispers, pressing a soft kiss to Harry’s forehead. “It’s perfect omega.”

Chapter Text

3 years later 

“Lou?” Harry asks, placing his tea cup on their table. It’s a warm day, one of the first 

ones May has to offer, so they are sitting in their garden making friendship bracelets while drinking their tea. Their garden . Because they found a house after one year of searching for the perfect one and moved in less than a month ago. It’s still not completely done, there are still some boxes that need unpacking and some places that feel way too empty but it’s theirs and they couldn't be happier. They already picked out what rooms they would give to their pups and it all feels a bit crazy to Louis, that this is really his life. 

Louis and Harry’s arms are already filled with bracelets, containing lyrics or inside jokes and Harry made sure to also make some for Niall, Zayn and Sprout. Louis watches him turn in his lap, placing his hands on Harry’s waist to steady him. Harry stops once he’s facing Louis, a nervous expression on his face. 

“Yeah pup?” Louis smiles, removing his hands from Harry’s waist to intertwine their hands and  kissing Harry's fingers. Harry watches him with a dazed look, his lips parting slightly. Louis grins, loves how easily distracted Harry is by simple gestures. “Darling?” He asks, pulling Harry out of his head. 

“Right uhm…” The omega bites his lips, squirming in Louis' lap so Louis gives his hands a reassuring squeeze. 

“You know how my heat is coming up?” The omega asks with a cute blush and Louis nods. 

“‘Course I know babe,” Louis says light heartedly. Harry always gets nervous when it comes to these things, whether it’s heats or ruts or sex. He always gets all blushy and squirmy, no matter how much Louis tries to reassure him that it’s normal to talk about such things, especially in a relationship. He doesn’t mind that Harry gets shy about it but he just wishes he wouldn’t always be so afraid to speak up about the things he wants. 

“Yeah uhm… well- and we’ve also been together for almost three years now.” 

“Also aware of that, my love.” Louis smiles, leaning forward to gently bump his nose against Harry’s, making the omega smile, a dimple popping out. 

“That’s good. I uhm… Iwantyoutomateme .”

Louis chokes on air and coughs. “Come again?” He squeaks out. 

“I want you to mate me, alpha ,” Harry repeats, voice shaky but his eyes determined. 

“I- I mean. Really ?!” Louis asks and Harry nods. 

“I- yeah? Do you- do you not want to?” The omega suddenly worries and Louis is quick to shake his head. 

“No- Fuck no ! Yes ! I mean yes, of course I want to mate you. I love you baby, I want us to have a future together but don’t you think that’s a bit too soon?” Louis asks carefully. 

“No?” Harry asks, now sounding uncertain. “I love you and you’re my alpha. I want everyone else to know it too. I- there’s only you for me and I’m ready to take that step. I want to take that step with you.” 

“And I want to take it with you,” Louis promises, pushing some of Harry’s hair behind his ear. “I just don’t want you to feel like we have to take this step now because that’s what society expects of us. This is about us so we get to decide when we feel ready. I feel ready baby but I also still would feel ready in a year or five from now. I just don’t want you to feel pressured,” Louis explains.  

“Always taking care of me,” Harry mumbles and Louis shrugs. 

“Course,” he says as if it’s the easiest thing in the world, because it is. Harry’s happiness is the most important thing to him. 

“I want this Lou. I really, really do. So y’know if you wanna kind of spend the rest of your life with me, I’d kinda want that too. Mate me alpha.” 

“Fuck, I love you,” Louis says, leaning up so he can connect his lips with Harry’s. “You know I can’t say no to you.”

“I know.” Harry grins, placing his hands on either side of Louis' face. His finger tips are slightly cold and Louis knows they’ll have to get inside soon but right now he focuses on kissing his omega. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

“Will it hurt?” Harry asks a couple nights later. He’s gently stroking over the spot on Louis' neck where his bond mark would go, positively distracting him from everything else that’s going on around them. They’re lying in Harry’s nest, cuddled close while Tangled is playing in the background. 

“I don’t know pup, I’ve never been mated before. You could ask Zayn,” Louis whispers, taking Harry’s hand from his neck and kissing his palm before placing it on his chest. Harry sighs and smiles, leaning up to kiss Louis. 

“I can’t wait either way,” the omega mumbles, making Louis smile. 

“Me too. Though I would prefer not to hurt you.”

Harry shrugs. “Think it’s kinda inevitable but it’ll be worth it,”hHe says, resting his head back on Louis' chest and focusing back on the movie where Flynn and Rapunzel are singing their duet. 

“Yeah,” Louis agrees, though his head is running at 100 miles per hour, wondering if it’ll hurt Harry and how much it would hurt him. He’ll definitely call Zayn, because he knows Harry won’t. 

They’ve got a week left until Harry’s heat should come, meaning they have more or less 5 days until Harry will slip into his soft heat. Louis is thrumming with nerves. 

They’ve been dating for almost three years now and have spent more than a few of their ruts and heats together and Louis always made sure to take care of Harry, to talk to him before and afterwards, about what he likes and wants or doesn’t. They’re good on the communication front, Louis makes sure of that and they know each other inside out and yet, Louis feels like he’ll fuck everything up this time around. 

He sighs and holds Harry closer, kisses the top of his head and starts scenting him intensely. It’s possessive but the omega hums happily so Louis knows he doesn’t mind the act much. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

“So it won’t hurt?” Louis worries, taking a drag from his cigarette. He hasn’t smoked in a long while but he’s stressed out and this seems to be the only thing that helps, aside from scenting Harry and leaving love bites in his throat ready for everyone to see who dares to look at him. Louis is feeling awfully territorial about him lately. 

“Well it will but he’ll be pretty much gagging for your cock immediately after and then it’s all good again,” Zayn replies nonchalantly. 

“Zayn!” Louis hisses. 

“What? Not like he doesn’t do it already all the time. Listen Louis. It’s cute that you’re so worried but people get mated all the time and you never hear any horror stories about how painful it was, do you?” 

“No I s’pose not,” Louis sighs and Zayn hums. 

“Exactly. You’ll be there to soothe him and take care of him anyway. So, what’s all the panic for?”

Louis pauses but then decides to tell the truth. “I’m worried Harry is rushing himself into this.”

“Oh,” Zayn says quietly. 

“I want him to be my mate and I believe when he says he wants this too, I’m just not sure if right now is the best timing. He was so reluctant to date me and it’s only been three years.“

“Harry hasn’t had the easiest past and I know three years seem like not a lot of time but if he wants this, and I know that he does and I know that you do as well, you should trust him to know what he wants and to know whether he’s ready or not. If you’re not ready then you can say that but don’t go ahead deciding this for him. That’s solely his choice and when he says he’s ready, he’s ready. Believe me, his omega would be screaming at him if he weren’t. Besides, three years really isn’t that little. Sounds like you having second thoughts if I’m being honest. ” 

“I don’t!” Louis says, almost growls and he sighs. “I’m sorry. But I swear I don’t. I love Harry with everything I’ve got. I just am aware that this is a big step and that it’s one that’s not so easily undone.” 

“He knows that. Now stop worrying. Your alphaness is getting on my nerves.” 

“My… my what ?” Louis sputters. 

“Your alphaness. It’s annoying. Go all worried alpha on Harry but don’t let it out in me. You’re overthinking this.” 

“I should’ve called Niall,” Louis grumbles. 

“But Loulou, I have so much fun talking to you.” 

“Bye Zayn.” Louis rolls his eyes and ends the call though he does open his and Zayns chat and tell him to give Sprout a kiss from his favourite uncle. 

Zayn replies that that’s obviously Harry but then he gets a picture of a sleeping Sprout, sucking on a green pacifier and being covered by the blanket Harry has knitted for him.  

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

“Pick whatever you want for the weekend, my treat,” Louis says as they enter the grocery store. If Louis is right, Harry should enter his soft heat by the next morning. He’s antsy, probably more so than Harry, who places himself between Louis and their cart like he usually does when they are shopping together, feeling safe in Louis' arms. It never fails to make Louis‘ knees go weak. 

“Really?” Harry asks, turning slightly to Louis. They usually split the grocery bill in half. 

“Really,” Louis says, leaning up and stealing a kiss from Harry. 

“Can I get the expensive chocolates?“ 

“Of course, my love,” Louis says and Harry grins happily. 

“Oh also I think I wanna bake some things so we need eggs.” 

“Not sure we’ve got time for that,” Louis mumbles, scanning the store for any possible threats like a lunatic. “Your scents’ already changing.” 

Harry pouts but allows Louis to walk him through the aisles of the store, throwing everything they may want or need into their cart. By the end, they probably bought more than they need but Harry is already munching on chocolate covered pretzels and smiling happily so Louis finds he doesn't mind that much. 

They go back home, the audiobook version of a book Harry has been wanting to read for forever now playing, and Louis would be lying if he said he weren't interested in it as well, following the plot closely. He makes a note to either read the book to Harry later or at least tell him to not continue it on his own. 

Once they're at their house, Harry starts unpacking all their groceries, the kettle already on while Louis starts cutting up some fruit. 

“We should probably meal prep again,” Harry says, hugging Louis from behind and hiding his nose in Louis' neck. 

“On it pup.” Louis smiles, always loving how extra cuddly Harry becomes when he starts his soft heat.

“But I want to cuddle outside,” Harry pouts, voice muffled by Louis' skin. 

Louis drops the knife and turns around, pulling the omega flush to his body. “I’ll do it later,” he promises and Harry hums happily. 

“Good.” 

Louis places whatever fruit he already has cut on a plate for them to snack on now while Harry grabs their cups and they go outside. 

As they step into the garden, the sun is beginning to dip toward the horizon, casting a warm, golden glow over the greenery. Louis can't help but feel a sense of peace settle over him. Their garden is still a work in progress, just like the rest of the house, but it's theirs. It’s a place that already holds so many memories and promises of the future.

They settle onto the blanket they had laid out earlier, Louis placing the plate of fruit between them. Harry is quick to snuggle into Louis’ side, letting out a contented sigh as he does. Louis drapes an arm around his omega, pulling him closer as they both take in the quiet beauty of the evening.

“This feels like a dream,” Harry murmurs after a while, his voice soft. Louis glances down at him, noting the serene smile on his lips. “Sometimes, I still can’t believe this is our life.”

Louis presses a kiss to the top of Harry’s head, feeling his heart swell with affection. “I know what you mean,” he admits. “But it’s real, love. And it’s only going to get better.”

Harry tilts his head up to meet Louis’ gaze, his green eyes filled with a mixture of love and something else—something deeper, more intense. “I want that. I want everything with you.”

Louis nods, his thumb brushing over Harry’s cheek. “And you’ll have it, pup. I promise.”

They sit there in comfortable silence for a while, watching the sky slowly turn from gold to shades of pink and purple. The calmness of the moment is something Louis cherishes, a stark contrast to the anxiety he’s been feeling about the upcoming heat and the bond they’re about to create.

“I’ve been thinking,” Harry says after a while, his voice pulling Louis from his thoughts. “About us. About mating.”

Louis’ heart skips a beat, but he keeps his voice steady as he responds. “What about it, love?”

Harry shifts slightly, his gaze dropping to the bracelet he’s been playing with around his wrist. “I know you’re worried. And I get it, I really do. It’s a big step, and it’s permanent. But that’s what I want, Louis. I want that permanence with you. I’m ready for it.”

Louis swallows hard, his mind racing. He knows Zayn was right—he can’t decide for Harry, and he knows Harry well enough to trust that when he says he’s ready, he truly is. But still, the protective part of him can’t help but worry.

“I know you are, pup,” Louis says gently. “I just want to make sure you’re doing this for you. Not because you feel like it’s something we have to do.”

Harry smiles, a soft, understanding smile that makes Louis’ heart ache with love. “I’m doing this because I love you, Lou. Because I want to spend the rest of my life with you. And I want everyone to know that you’re my alpha, just like I’m your omega.”

Louis’ breath hitches at Harry’s words, the sincerity in his voice hitting him square in the chest. He can’t argue with that, and he doesn’t want to. He wants that too—so much that it scares him a little.

“Alright,” Louis finally says, his voice thick with emotion. “Alright, love. Let’s do this. Let’s make that future ours.”

Harry’s smile widens, and he leans in to capture Louis’ lips in a slow, tender kiss. Louis can feel the love radiating from him, can feel the certainty in the way Harry holds him close. It’s enough to chase away any lingering doubts, leaving only the pure, undeniable love he feels for the omega in his arms.

When they finally pull away, Harry rests his forehead against Louis’, their breaths mingling in the cool evening air. “Thank you,” Harry whispers, his voice filled with gratitude.

“For what?” Louis asks, genuinely curious.

“For loving me. For choosing me. For being you.”

Louis feels his throat tighten with emotion, and he hugs Harry even tighter. “Always, pup. I’ll always choose you.”

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

The kitchen buzzes with activity as Louis and Harry spend their Saturday preparing for the upcoming days. The scent of freshly chopped fruits mingles with the aroma of various dishes cooking on the stove, creating a comforting atmosphere that fills their home. The radio plays softly in the background, a calming soundtrack to their domestic routine.

Harry, in his typical fashion, hovers close to Louis, his fingers often brushing against Louis’ arm or back as they move around the kitchen. Every now and then, Harry’s clinginess becomes more pronounced, and he pauses whatever task he’s been assigned to sidle up to Louis, pressing close and nuzzling his neck.

Louis, who had anticipated Harry’s neediness, doesn’t mind one bit. In fact, he welcomes these little moments, indulging Harry with affectionate touches and soft murmurs of reassurance. When Harry tugs on his sleeve, looking up at him with those big green eyes that Louis can never say no to, Louis immediately abandons his chopping to wrap his arms around his omega, holding him tight.

“Just need you close for a minute,” Harry whispers into Louis’ shoulder, his voice slightly muffled.

Louis hums, running his hands up and down Harry’s back. “Take all the time you need, love.”

Harry melts into Louis’ embrace, his body going pliant and warm against him. Louis rests his chin on top of Harry’s shoulder, breathing in the familiar scent of his omega, now tinged with the subtle shift of his soft heat approaching. It’s a scent that soothes something deep within Louis, easing any lingering tension he might have felt earlier.

They stand there for a while, swaying gently in the middle of the kitchen, as if the world outside doesn’t exist. The only thing that matters right now is the feeling of Harry in his arms, the quiet intimacy of their shared space.

Eventually, Harry pulls back slightly, a soft smile playing on his lips. “Sorry, I know we’ve got a lot to do.”

Louis shakes his head, cupping Harry’s face in his hands. “No need to apologise. We’ve got all day, pup. Besides, I like taking breaks like this.”

Harry’s smile widens, and he leans into Louis’ touch, a small blush in his cheeks. “Me too.”

With one last kiss to Harry’s forehead, Louis reluctantly lets him go, though he stays close by as they return to their tasks. Every so often, Harry will reach out to take Louis’ hand or whichever part he can reach, and each time, Louis responds with a soft smile or a gentle touch, kissing Harry whether it’s closest, on his shoulder, his nose, or lips. 

As the hours pass, the fridge slowly fills up with prepped meals and containers of fruit, each one carefully stored and ready for the days ahead. Louis feels a sense of satisfaction at the sight of it, knowing that they’re as prepared as they can be for Harry’s heat. More than that, though, he feels content and happy to spend the day like this, just the two of them, focused entirely on each other.

By the time evening rolls around, Harry’s clinginess has only increased, and Louis finds himself being pulled into the living room where Harry’s nest is. Louis allows himself to be led away, knowing that this is exactly where he needs to be.

They settle into the nest, the familiar scent of Harry’s space wrapping around them like a warm blanket. Louis immediately pulls Harry into his lap, holding him close as they curl up together. Harry sighs contentedly, his fingers tracing lazy patterns on Louis’ chest.

“Thanks for today,” Harry mumbles, his voice sleepy but filled with gratitude.

“Anything for you, love,” Louis replies, kissing the top of Harry’s head.

“Happy thoughts?” Harry asks and Louis can’t help but smile. It’s a thing they do, whenever one of them needs some distraction or if the silence feels too heavy, or if they just want to daydream. 

Louis looks at Harry, at the anxious gleam in his eyes that he knows is there because of his heat. Ever since his heat three years ago, Harry’s heats have been regular. Louis made sure to get him checked out by a doctor just to be sure everything’s how it’s supposed to be but still, Harry has this fear when it comes to his heats and Louis doesn’t think he’ll ever shake it again. So, he knows that look all too well, knows what it means, how it creeps in when the world feels overwhelming.

“Okay,” Louis says softly, reaching over to take Harry’s hand. He gives it a gentle squeeze, grounding them both. “Happy thoughts.”

Harry’s shoulders relax a little, and Louis can see him trying to focus. “You go first,” Harry insists, his voice quieter now, almost shy.

Louis pretends to think, even though the first thought that always comes to his mind is sitting right next to him. But he knows Harry needs this, needs to hear something light and easy, something to pull him out of his head.

“The smell of freshly brewed tea on a gloomy autumn morning. When the windows are fogged up and you’re still tired and cold from the night but then you’ve got that warm cuppa in your hands and somehow the world seems alright.” 

Harry giggles and nods. “Coming home to you,” Harry mumbles after a few beats. “It’s all I think about when I’m out, I count down the minutes until I get to be in your arms again.” 

Louis hums. “It's my favourite part of the day too. No matter how tough it’s been, I know I'll get to be with you in the end.” 

After a few moments, Louis decides to share another happy thought. “The way you look at me when you’re still half-asleep,” he says softly, his voice full of affection. “All sleepy-eyed and soft, like you’re not quite sure if you’re dreaming or if I’m really there.”

Harry looks up at him, his eyes shining with emotion. “You always are,” he whispers, the words full of certainty. “You’re always there when I wake up. It’s one of my favourite things.” 

Louis smiles and leans in, gently kissing Harry. “I’ll always be.” He promises. 

“More,” Harry whispers and Louis smiles at him but nods. 

“Dancing in the kitchen with you. I love when you’re you , when you don’t care about anyone else and just let yourself be. I love to see you so careless and happy, free of any burden no matter how big or small.” 

As the night falls and the stars begin to twinkle outside their window, Louis holds Harry close, feeling an overwhelming ,sense of peace wash over him. They’ve done everything they could to prepare for the days ahead, they’ve talked about how they want to mate, what position and during what time, even if they stumbled over some of the words with red cheeks. The thought of mating Harry makes Louis feel all sorts of giddy and any worry he might’ve had is long gone. 

Louis lies in the darkness, the soft rhythm of Harry's breathing the only sound breaking the stillness of the night. The reality of what tomorrow holds keeps him wide awake, his mind buzzing with thoughts and emotions. By this time tomorrow, Harry will be his mate. That thought alone is enough to make his heart race, both with excitement and a flicker of nervousness, not because he’s worried but more so because he wants it to be perfect for Harry.  

He turns his head slightly, his gaze settling on Harry’s face, illuminated by the faint light seeping through the curtains. Harry’s expression is peaceful, his features relaxed as he drifts into sleep. Louis’ eyes trace the familiar curve of Harry’s jaw, the soft sweep of his lashes, and the delicate freckles scattered across his nose and cheeks. He tries to imprint every detail into his memory, as if he could ever forget.

It hits Louis, not for the first time, just how deeply he loves him. It’s a kind of love that he never expected to find, one that’s rooted in something so pure and genuine that it leaves him breathless. He’s loved before, or at least he thinks he did, but this…this is different. This love is all-encompassing, like it’s woven into the very fabric of his being.

Louis can’t help but reach out, brushing a stray curl from Harry’s forehead. His fingers linger, tracing the soft skin there, barely making contact but feeling the warmth radiating from his omega. He knows he’s probably overthinking it, that the nerves twisting in his stomach are just that—nerves. But it’s hard not to, when tomorrow will change everything.

It’s not that he’s having second thoughts. No, he’s never been more certain of anything in his life. He wants this, wants Harry to be his in every way possible, wants the world to know that Harry is his and he’s Harry’s. But with that certainty comes a weight, a responsibility that Louis is determined to live up to.

He knows Harry is ready, that he’s eager for this next step in their relationship, but Louis can’t help worrying, can’t help wondering if he’s enough, if he’ll be able to protect Harry, to care for him the way he deserves. He’s never been one to shy away from responsibility, but this is different. This is Harry, the person who holds his heart in the palm of his hand.

Louis lets out a quiet sigh, leaning down to press a soft kiss to Harry’s forehead. Harry stirs slightly, his face nuzzling closer into Louis’ chest, seeking his warmth even in sleep. The small movement brings a smile to Louis’ lips, and he tightens his hold on Harry, feeling that familiar rush of protectiveness surge through him.

He knows he won’t get much sleep tonight. There’s too much on his mind, too many thoughts swirling around as he tries to come to terms with the magnitude of what tomorrow will bring. But for now, he’s content to just hold Harry close, to feel the steady beat of his heart and the rise and fall of his chest.

As he watches Harry sleep, Louis feels a deep sense of contentment settle over him. He’s grateful for this life they’ve built together, for the love they’ve found in each other, and for the future they’re about to step into.

Tomorrow will be a new beginning for them, one that will bind them together in a way that nothing else can. With that thought in mind, Louis finally allows himself to close his eyes, holding his omega a little tighter, knowing that when the sun rises, they’ll be ready to take that next step together.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Louis gently tightens his grip around Harry, feeling the warmth of the omega's body against his own. The early morning light filters through the curtains, casting a soft glow over the room. Harry shifts slightly in his sleep, pressing closer to Louis as if seeking comfort and security even in his dreams.

Louis smiles to himself, pressing a soft kiss to the back of Harry's neck. The scent of milk and honey fills his senses, calming and grounding him. It’s a scent he’s grown to love, one that means Harry is near, that he’s safe, and that he needs Louis. 

Harry stirs, a small, sleepy noise escaping his lips as he slowly wakes up. Louis feels the moment Harry becomes fully aware, his body tensing briefly before relaxing as he realises he’s not alone. Harry turns in Louis’s arms, blinking up at him with hazy, green eyes still heavy with sleep.

“Hi,” Harry murmurs, his voice soft and a little raspy.

“Morning, baby,” Louis replies, brushing a stray curl from Harry’s forehead. “How’re you feeling?”

Harry hums, nuzzling into Louis’s chest. “Sleepy. Warm.”

Louis chuckles, the sound low and affectionate. “Figured. You’re alright, though?”

“Mm-hmm,” Harry nods, his face half-buried in Louis’s shirt. “Just… stay with me?”

“Always,” Louis promises, his hand rubbing soothing circles on Harry’s back. “I’m not going anywhere.”

They lie there in the quiet, the only sounds are the gentle rhythm of their breathing and the soft rustle of sheets as they shift slightly to get more comfortable. Louis knows that soon enough, Harry’s heat will intensify, his scent already getting sweeter, and they’ll need to prepare for it, but for now, he’s content to just be here, holding Harry close and offering the comfort the omega needs.

Harry’s breathing evens out again, and Louis realises he’s fallen back asleep. Louis smiles softly, feeling the steady rise and fall of Harry’s chest against his own. He presses another kiss to Harry’s temple, then closes his eyes, letting himself drift off again with the sweet scent of his omega filling his senses.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Eventually, they’re both fully awake, and Louis reluctantly untangles himself from Harry to head to the kitchen. Harry follows close behind, still half-asleep but needing to be near. By the time breakfast is ready, Harry’s need for contact has only intensified, and he ends up in Louis’ lap, his legs draped over Louis’ thighs as they eat. Louis doesn’t mind; in fact, he loves it. He loves how naturally Harry seeks him out, how they fit together so perfectly.

As they eat, Louis can’t help but notice how Harry’s scent has deepened, becoming richer and more intoxicating. The milk and honey are still there, but there’s an added layer now, something darker, more urgent, that sends a thrill of anticipation through Louis. It’s a reminder of what’s coming. 

Harry shifts in his lap, leaning back against Louis with a soft sigh as he takes a spoon full of granola. Louis feels the heat radiating from Harry’s body, the way his scent wraps around him like a blanket, pulling him in deeper. It’s becoming harder to focus on anything else, the instinct to claim Harry growing stronger with each passing minute.

“Lou…” Harry’s voice is soft, almost shy as he looks up at Louis through his lashes, his cheeks flushed. There’s a question in his eyes, a plea, and Louis can feel the tension between them tightening like a cord.

“I know, love,” Louis murmurs, his voice low and thick with desire. He brushes his lips against Harry’s temple, feeling the way Harry shivers in response. “Soon, I promise.”

Harry nods, his fingers curling into the fabric of Louis’ shirt as he presses closer. Louis can feel the rapid beat of Harry’s heart, the way his body is responding to the impending heat. It takes all of Louis’ self-control not to push everything away and take Harry right there, but he knows they have to wait, to make sure they’re both ready.

As they finish their breakfast, the tension between them only grows. Every touch, every look exchanged is charged with unspoken desire, with the knowledge of what’s coming. Louis’ mind is filled with the thought of sinking his teeth into Harry’s neck, of finally making him his in the way they’ve both craved for so long. He can almost taste it, the satisfaction of marking Harry as his own, of feeling the bond solidify between them.

The more time that passes, the more Louis feels the pull of his instincts, the need to claim, to protect, to love Harry in the most primal way. He can see the same desire mirrored in Harry’s eyes, can feel it in the way Harry clings to him, seeking reassurance, seeking him.

“Lou… I need you,” Harry whispers, his voice soft but laced with urgency. His eyes are dark, pupils blown wide with desire, and Louis can see the raw need there, the trust and the love that Harry has for him.

“I’m here, love,” Louis murmurs, his hands coming up to cup Harry’s face, his thumbs brushing over Harry’s flushed cheeks. “I’m right here.”

Harry leans into the touch, his breath hitching as Louis’ fingers trace the line of his jaw, the column of his throat. The scent of Harry’s heat surrounds them, wrapping them in a cocoon of warmth and longing. It’s almost too much, the way it pulls at Louis’ instincts, making him want to give in, to take Harry right then and there.

But he holds back, letting the moment stretch out, savouring the closeness, the anticipation. His lips ghost over Harry’s, a teasing brush that has Harry whining softly, his hips shifting restlessly in Louis’ lap.

“Please, alpha,” Harry breathes, his voice almost a whimper. “I need you.”

Still, Louis takes his time undressing them, trailing kisses down Harry's body, in the inside of his thigh, that’s glistening with slick, up his stomach until he reaches his lips again. Harry’s is a whining, whimpering mess beneath him, needy in the loveliest way. 

Louis gives Harry one last kiss before he tilts his head to the side, exposing the soft, pale skin of his neck. His teeth scrape lightly against the skin, and Harry gasps, his fingers digging into Louis’ back. Then, with a growl, Louis bites down, feeling the sharp, satisfying give as his teeth sink in, marking Harry as his. 

Harry’s moan is loud, raw, and full of relief as the bond begins to form between them, weaving their souls together in a way that is both ancient and powerful. Louis holds Harry close, feeling the connection solidify, the warmth and love between them intensifying as they become truly, irrevocably bound to each other.

When Louis finally pulls back, he licks over the fresh mark, soothing the skin and tasting the sweetness of Harry’s scent on his tongue. Harry’s eyes are glazed with pleasure, his breath coming in short gasps as he gazes up at Louis, his expression soft and full of love.

“Mine,” Louis whispers, and Harry nods, a blissful smile spreading across his face.

“Yours,” Harry agrees, and Louis knows, deep in his bones, that this is exactly where they’re meant to be. “Need you, Alpha,” he breathes, his tone carrying a mix of longing and urgency. His hands tighten on Louis’ shoulders, pulling him down, closer, as if he can’t bear even an inch of space between them.

The words send a shiver down Louis’ spine, igniting the primal instinct within him that’s been simmering just beneath the surface. His omega needs him—desperately, completely—and Louis is more than ready to give him everything.

“I’m here, love,” Louis murmurs, his voice rough and full of promise. His hand cups Harry’s cheek, his thumb brushing over the mark he’s just left on Harry’s neck. The sight of it, fresh and claiming, sends a thrill of possessiveness through him. “I’m not going anywhere. I’ve got you.”

Harry’s breath hitches, and for a moment, something new stirs in the air between them. It’s soft at first, almost imperceptible, but as Louis leans in, brushing his lips against Harry’s, he feels it—a gentle, rhythmic vibration that seems to come from deep within Harry’s chest.

Purring.

It’s the first time Harry has ever purred around Louis and the sound wraps around him like a warm embrace, filling him with an almost overwhelming sense of tenderness. The purring grows stronger, vibrating through Harry’s body and into Louis’, binding them even closer together.

Louis’ heart swells with affection. He knows what this means—how deeply Harry trusts him, how completely he has given himself over. “You’re perfect,” Louis whispers, his voice thick with emotion, as he rests his forehead against Harry’s. The purring doesn’t stop; it only deepens, resonating through them both as if it’s a part of the bond itself.

With a soft smile, Louis kisses Harry again, his lips moving slowly, reverently, as if to savour every moment. The purring continues, a constant, soothing reminder of the love that pulses between them.

And then, almost instinctively, Louis feels something stirring within himself. It starts low, deep in his chest, a rumble that matches the rhythm of Harry’s purr. It surprises him at first, but as the rumbling grows, he realises it’s his own response, his alpha instincts answering Harry’s call. The sound is low and steady, vibrating through his chest and into Harry, merging with Harry’s purr until it feels like they’re creating their own private symphony.

The rumbling sends a wave of calm and possessive contentment through Louis. His omega is purring for him, and he is answering, claiming Harry in the most primal, intimate way.

As Louis moves over Harry, their bodies fitting together like they were made for each other, he knows there’s nothing else he could ever want. This is everything—his omega, his love, his life. And with every touch, every whispered word, every shared breath, they reaffirm the bond that ties them together, stronger than anything, lasting forever.

“Always yours,” Louis whispers against Harry’s lips as they finally come together, his voice vibrating with the rumbling in his chest. He feels Harry’s answering moan, filled with nothing but love and trust, as their sounds blend together, creating a harmony that speaks of their connection, their bond, their forever.

They move as one, their connection deepening with every moment, every heartbeat, until there’s no beginning or end -  just them, perfectly intertwined, now and forever.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Happy days are spending the rest of their lives together, creating happy thoughts. 

fin