Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

So, i swapped Hazbin Hotel characters for fun.

Swaps are:
Lute as Charlie
Adam as Vaggie
Vox as Alastor
Vaggie as Niffty
Husk as Sir Pentious
Angel Dust as Cherri Bomb
Katie Killjoy as Angel Dust
Tom Trench as Husk.

Overlords:
Alastor as Vox
Rosie as Valentino
Mimzy as Velvette
The three of them created "The Old Entertainers" (TOE's. Haha.)

Velvette as Zestial (As in, She's the oldest Overlord)
Valentino as Rosie

Some other swaps:

Sera as Carmilla Carmine
Emily as Clara & Odette

Sir Pentious as Adam
Cherri Bomb as Lute

Carmilla Carmine as Sera.
Clara & Odette as Emily.

Some explanations:
Lute still used to be an exorcist, but she spared a sinner mother, which caused her to lose an arm, and get kicked out of heaven.
Adam used to Lead the exterminations, but he didn't know what the exterminations are REALLY for, and when he found out, he started to questiton stuff, and used all his authority to try to stop it from happening again.

Sera and Emily aren't/weren't angels.
Lilith knows Lute when she was back in Heaven due to Adam. Lilith sometimes jokes that Lute is her daughter, but they started taking it seriously.<
Alastor, Rosie, & Mimzy (yes, she's an overlord) created The Old Entertainers, an overlord group, however, the VEES don't exist in this au (DUH!)

Read the future chapters to find out more.

Chapter Text

[The scene opens with a voiceover of Lute singing "I'm Always Chasing Rainbows".]

Lute: ♫At the end of a rainbow, there's always happiness.♫

[A human is shown falling down from the sky as a rainbow bursts upwards through the clouds.]

Lute: ♫And, to find it, oh, how often I've tried. But, my life, is a race. Just a wild goose chase. A never enting race...♫

[Camera pans over to where a figure was pointing at, which shows Hell being circled by Angels.]

Lute: ♫And, my dreams, have all been denied. Why have I always been a failure? [A shadow of Lilith looms over a disappointed Lute as demonic arms and tentacles cover the screen.] What can the reason be? I wonder if it's the world to blame. [The Earth rotates as many eyes begin to surround it.] I wonder if it's me that's to blame...♫

[The Exorcists are seen smiling deviously as they look down upon the souls they have gotten rid of. The scene turns to black as the camera focuses on the middle Exorcist's face and halo.]

Lute: ♫I'm always chasing rainbows. Watching as the clouds drift by.♫

[The scene fades in on graffiti and signs that says "Fuck You, Heaven", "Punishment" and "Your Days Are Numbered" can be seen throughout Hell.]

Lute: ♫ My schemes are just like all my dreams. Ending in the void.♫ [She looks out of the hotel's window as someone releases fireworks that signals the rest of Hell that the Extermination has ended.] Some fellows look and find sunshine.♫

[A handful of demons are seen checking the area to see if the coast is all clear.]

Lute: ♫ I always tried to look, but i only found the rain.♫

[Sera opens the blinds to her room, revealing the display of fireworks. The camera then proceeds to show Velvette and Zeezi, as well as Lilith herself hiding in the shadows, present in the same room as her.]

Lute: ♫Some fellows have it always easy.♫

[At the Radio Studios, Rosie takes a selfie with Alastor whereas Mimzy is not amused when she sees that she got a text from her employee.]

Lute: ♫And i never managed to make a gain. Believe me. ♫

[Emily and another demon pull out an angelic spear from a corpse and leave as the cannibals waiting nearby pounce on her dead body. Valentino then crosses out Franklin's name from the sign above their business.]

Lute: ♫I'm always chasing rainbows.♫

[A demon can be seen cleaning up what's been left of the Extermination as other demons begin to freely walk about in the open.]

Lute: [As she's in tears.] ♫Waiting to find a little bluebird... in vain.♫

[Lute looks back at the Clock Tower as it resets the timer for the next yearly cleanse.]

[A sinner has fallen into Hell and has been transformed into a demon. He falls face-first onto the road and is surprised to see that he is still "alive".]

Four-armed Demon: Aaaaah! *lands* Ugh. Huh? *checks himself* I'm alive! I'm alive-

[He then gets run over by a taxi driven by Susan which Katie Killjoy walks out of. Susan snickers.]

Susan: Heh. Thanks for the fun time, hot lady!

Katie Killjoy: [She pushes her hand through hee hair.] Yeah, yeah, yeah, listen here. [She Fixes her hair one more time.] Keep this thing discreet, you hear me? Okay? I can't let it get out I'm offerin' my services to random old ladies on the street! It was a quick cash grab. [She makes a gesture with her fingers and snaps his fingers at him, smiling.] Ya got it? Also. I need to keep up my image of my alleged homophobia.

Susan: Pfft! Whatever you say, you hoe! Hah!

Katie Killjoy: [She pretends to be offended.] Ouch! Ooh! [She turns back to face Susan.] Such an insult! Let me know when you've come up with a better insult [She looms over Susan and points at her her index fingers], you sack of old bag of bones fucking shitface! Tell your husband that i said "hi" [kisses her], suck him good when you get home!

Susan: [defeatedly] Fucking slut- How dare she-

[As Susan angrily drives off, Katie looks behind her to see a vending machine for drugs. She goes for heroin and just as she gets a hold of it, a random demon runs by and steals her drugs.]

Feathered Demon: Yoink!

Katie Killjoy: [annoyed] Hey!

Feathered Demon: Suck my ass titty haver!

[A boulder proceeds to fall out of the sky, crushing the feathered demon alongside Katie's drugs and she gasps.]

Katie Killjoy: Oh, my GOD! [She leans in to pick up what's left of her pack of drugs with a devastated look on her face.] MY DRUGS! [She clenches the cloth angrily and looks up] Fuck!

[A war ship can be seen passing by, destroying its surroundings.]

[The camera zooms in on the war ship, revealing Husk and the Kitten Bois inside.]

Husk: [While he's operating the controls to his ship.] Ahahahahahahahahahahah! Those other sinners dare not hinder my territorial take over! A wise decision! The power of my machines are unmatched! [He proceeds to push two levers as his wings rise up.] No other demon can compare to the likes of I!

Kitten Boi #23: Gee! That was pretty swell, boss!

Kitten Boi #666: Yeah!

Other Kitten Boi: You really showed them what for! I liked when you [his hand mimics the action of a shooting ray gun] shot them with your ray gun! [gets slapped away by Husk]

Kitten Boi #23: I wish he'd shoot me with his ray gun! [Other Kitten Boi pats him]

Husk: At this rate, I will have control of the entire west side of The Pentagram by day's end! [He pushes a few buttons] And nothing, [pulls levers towards him] not a single beast in this inferno of suffering will be able to take back this empire from [He squeezes an kitten Boi with his tail] my constrictive grasp!

[A kitten Boi suddenly pops on screen and pops open a bottle of whiskey onto Husk's face. Husk proceeds to swat said Kitten Boi aside before throwing the squeezed Kitten Boi aside as well.]

Random Kitten Boi: Oh, boy!

Husk: Hell will be mine! And everybody will know the name of Hu-

[He is interrupted by a scream coming from offscreen.]

Angel Dust: PUSSYCAT!

Husk: WHAT?! [He looks around angrily and eyes the two Kitten Bois behind him.] Who said that?! Did you just insult me?! You fucking cats? Speak up!

The Two Kitten Bois: That wasn't us mr. bossman...

[A small bomb with a print of a skull on it breaks through Husk's ship. It then lands right between Husk and the two kitten bois. The bomb proceeds to blow up, leaving pink smoke behind. And leaving Husk to cough. As the smoke clears up, the owner of the scream is revealed to be Angel Dust as he prepares another bomb in hand.]

Angel Dust: You looking for a fight, kitten whiskers? [He begins to juggle around the bomb in his hands.] Why don't you get this load of bullshit off my turf before I [proceeds to throw and catch the bomb] blow it up?! [A large pipe falls onto the ground.] Okay?~

Husk: Oh! You're looking for a fight, mister?! Well, I'm happy to oblige! Ahahah! [He is then backed up by his henchmen of Kitten Boiz.]

[The logo for 666 News is shown on a black background, which is followed by the day's newscast.]

Zestial: Good afternoon, I'm Zestial Morde.

Zeezi: And im Missi Zilla. Chaos out at Pentagram City today as a turf war is raging on the west side! [An image of Husk appears, followed by a drawing of Tom flipping the bird is shown.] Between notable kingpin, Husker, and self-proclaimed punky spider boy, Angel Dust.

Zestial: That's right, Zeezi! After the recent Extermination, all over hell are fighting for their new potential territories. Especially those two.

[A live clip of Husk and Angel's clash is shown.]

Zeezi: Those two seem to be really going at it, huh?

Zestial: They are fighting tooth and nails for that hotspot.

Zeezi: [While she's looking over at the live broadcast focusing on Angel.] And I'd sure like him to nail my hot spot! [He wiggles hisceyebrows.] Hoohoo!

Zestial: Haha, you are a pussy, Zeezi! Or should I say- [He pours scalding hot tee onto her lap.] Pussyless.

Zeezi: [curls over in pain] Ugh...not again!

[The screen shows a picture of Lute as Zeezi can still be heard whimpering in pain in the background.]

Zestial: Coming up next, we have an exclusive interview with a former exorcist, who's here to discuss her brand new passion project! All this and more, after the break! [He crushes his mug in his hand and turns to Zeezi who's still in pain.] Suck it up, you little bi-!

[The news cast cuts off and goes on a commercial break.]

[The camera pans out from a nearby screen, focusing on Lute and her boyfriend as he fixes Lute's bow.]

Adam: [He exhales.] Okay! You remember what to say?

Lute: [She inhales.] Yes! This will be good!

Adam: [Dead seriously] Just, look at me and I'll mouth it to you.

Lute: Oh, come on, Adam! [She bends backward.] I know what to say! I just feel like we need to...I don't know, [she grabs and throws a doughnut away.] make things sound more exciting! [She excitedly gasps.] Hooo! You know what Lilith always says. What if I si-

Adam: [cutting her off.] -Sing a song about it?

Lute: Oh. I knew you knew I was gonna say that! [She boops Adam on the nose.]

Adam: Because I know you [He fixes her bow again.] But, please don't sing! [Shakes Lute] This is serious! You're known in Hell. But people don't care about you as much as they should. This could be a make or break.

Lute: Well, you know, everyone is better at expressing themselves and their goals through a good song! I can try it! [She stands on the table where Razzle and Dazzle are happily munching on doughnuts, watching her.]

Adam: But, life is not a musical.

Lute: Okay. Yeah. I know. Alright. Fine. Buuuut, I have a few other ideas of what to say! [She starts bouncing up and down happily a bit as she shows Adam a piece of paper.] The highlighted parts are the best parts!

Adam: But, these are all highlighted....And...Is this a drawing...?

Lute: Yes! That's the happy ending! [begins to fantasize] Everyone smiling and happy in Heaven!

Adam: [He pinches the bridge of his nose] Im afraid it's not that simple. We both know that. Just please follow the talking points we went over. And [grabs Lute to face him] do. not. sing!

Lute: Okay, fiiiine. I'll just have to resort to my improv skills i practice all the time! [She salutes Adam as she walks over to Zestial.] Hiii! I'm Lute. [She tries to go for a handshake.]

Zestial: The name's Zestial Morde. [blows out the smoke of his cigarette.] I'd say it's a pleasure to meet you, but that would be a huge ass lie. [He throws away his cigarette.] And you can put that away. [He gestures to Lute's hand.] I don't touch the gays. I have standards! You know?

Lute: Yeah? And...Uh... How's uh... how's that working out for ya? [She turns to look at the "Hell's #1 News" neon sign behind her]

Zestial: Look, my time is money. So, I'll be short with my answers. [proceeds to poke Lute's chest and nose, right after saying he doesn't touch "the gays"] You're not here because we wanted you here. You're here because Jeffrey couldn't make it for his cannibal cooking show segment. [A billboard of Jeffrey's cannibalism cooking show titled "It's Dahm Good!" can be seen in the background.] You might be some big shot in Hell, but i don't give two shits. I'm too rich and too influential, and i don't give any flying fucks about what some tux-wearing fallen [He does air quotes with his fingers.] "angel" wants to advertise here. [Zeezi is shaking jer head in disapproval as Zestial boasts about his wealth and influence to Lute.]

Lute: But, I-

Zestial: [He pokes her chest again.] So, I warn you, don't fuck with me, or I will fucking end you!

News Staff: And we're live again!

[Zestial rushes back to his desk, holding papers.]

Zestial: Welcome back! So, Luella!

Lute: It's uh...actually... Lute. [She smiles nervously as a spotlight flashes her way] not Luella...

Zestial: Who cares? Now. Tell us about this new passion project you've been pestering us and the news station about! [He tries to hold in his outburst by clenching his.]

Lute: [Looks around as Adam motions her to go on] Well, [she clears her throat and exhales] as most of you know, I fell into Hell a few yours ago. Almost 6 years now. And at my beginings here, at first, all i saw were disgusting, loathsome sinner fuckstains in the world that don't deserve to live. But after a while... I tried to see the good in everyone around me. [Zestial spots a slug and stabs it with his pen, the slug's blood bursts all over.] Hell is officially my new home and- [She gets slug blood splattered across her cheek which she then wipes off.] your home too. We... we just went through another Extermination. [Adam is seen giving Lute two thumbs up as Zestial quickly starts to lose interest.] We lost so many souls again, and it breaks my heart to see people being slaughtered every year. No one is even given [She slams her fist on table, waking Zestial up.] a chance! [She walks up from the desk.] Im not going to stand idly by while the place I live is subjected to such violence! So, I've been thinking: Isn't there a more humane way to hinder overpopulation here in Hell? [She walks around the audience.] Perhaps an alternative way to change souls through... redemption? [She throws her arm around one of the News Cast's staff members.] Well, I think yes! There IS a chance! So, that's what this project aims to achieve! [She returns to Zestial's desk] Ladies and gentlemen, I'm opening the first of its kind! A hotel. To rehabilitates sinners! And get them into heaven!

[Her broadcast is being shown at The Radio Shack, which many other demons are also watching by the streets and everywhere else in Hell.]

Lute: [Quickly starts to lose her confidence] Y'know? 'Cause hotels are for people passin' through... temporarily...

Lizard Demon: Ahahaha! IS this girl for real?! She thinks- [tries to hold in his laughter[ You hear what she thinks?! She thi- HAHA! Ah, she's nuts. [walks out of The Kaiju Klub with his friends.]

Lute: I think it'll serve a purpose... a place to work toward redemption...It's good right?... yay...!

[The scene cuts back to the demons watching her broadcast from The Radio Shack. A mysterious figure walks up to see her broadcast alongside a bunch of other demons watching, including Crymini.]

Cameraman Demon: [snickers] Stupid bitch.

[Adam punches the cameraman square in the face.]

Lute: [She looks around, saddened.] Look, every single one of you has something good, deep down inside. I know you all do! ...Maybe I'm just not getting through to you.

[Razzle and Dazzle are then alerted that Lute's about to sing and that she may need their back-up vocals.]

Adam: [He facepalms] Oh, no...

[Lute snaps her fingers as the room turns dark and a spotlight is shown over a piano that Lute, Razzle and Dazzle start performing on. Meanwhile, back at The Radio Shack, Vox and his shadow can be seen tilting their heads curiously as their smiles widen.]

Lute: ♫I have a dream, I'm here to tell! [She walks away from the piano as two news staff look at each other.] About a wonderful fantastic new [She takes out a drawing of the Happy Hotel] hotel!♫ ♫ Yes, it's one-of-a-kind! Right here in Hell, it might ring to a specific clientele [boops Dazzle's nose]. ♫

Razzle and Dazzle: ♫ Oooh, ooh, ooh~ ♫

[Zestial is in shock as Zeezi looks around, confused.]

Lute: Beecauseee...♫ Inside of every demon is a rainbow [She throws her arm around the necks of two bird demons]! Inside every sinner is a shiny smile [passes underneath a hellhound's tail]! Inside of every creepy hatchet-wielding maniac is a jolly, happy cupcake-loving child [She gandshands the masked demon a sparkling cupcake and pats his head]! We can turn them around! [She turns to Zestial & Zeezi.] They'll be Heaven-bound! With just a little time, down at the Happy Hotel! So, all you junkies [takes out syringe from a doll demon's head], freaks [takes a pic with a Siamese twin demon in its cage], and weirdos [fends off a several-eyed blob demon]. Creepers [stares at a snail demon out the window], fuck-ups [boops a couch demon on the nose], crooks, and zeroes [returns the stolen money to charity], and down-fallen superheroes [throws her hands behind the necks of two supervillain demons], help is here! All of you cretins [dips her hair into the water by the pier], sluts [holds out a pair of panties in disgust], and losers, sexual deviants [backs away from the sex offenders], and boozers [turns to face a depressed demon], and prescription drug abusers [throws away the drugs a blue demon is taking into a burning trash can], need no fear! Forever again [A demon lands on a wheelchair and is pushed by Razzle towards Lute and Dazzle], we'll cure your sins [She shows the demon her clipboard]! We'll make you well. [Dazzle injects a happiness serum into the patient], you'll feel so swell! Right here in Hell [briefly turns to her full demonic form], at the Happy Hotel!♫ [Razzle continues to aggressively play the piano. As Lute slides over to Zestial's right.] There'll be no more fires, [She slides over to Zeezi's left.] and no more screams. Just puppy dog kisses [She holds a dog close to her face and kisses it's nose], and cotton candy dreams [She holds out a stick of cotton candy.], and puffy-wuffy clouds [She cuddles both the dog and cotton candy], you're gonna be like "Wow!" [The camera pans out showing the clouds forming the word "Wow!"] Once you check in with meee [she shows a check-in chart]! ♫

[Adam has both of his hands covering his own face.]

Lute: ♫So, all your cartoon porn addictions [She confiscates a neckbeard demon's cartoon porn magazine], vegan rants [confiscates a vegan demon's Hellphone and takes a selfie with it], psychic predictions [confiscates the spell books and crystal ball of a psychic demon], ancient Roman crucifixions [avoids running into a crucified demon and knocks over two other crucified demons], end right here [She throws away all the confiscated items off a cliff]! All you monsters [She clenches the hands of two monstrous demons], thieves, and crazies [She points finger guns over a dog demon trying to steal baguettes from an insect demon whose hood flares open], cannibals [She tempts the cannibals with a severed arm on a plate], and crying babies [she looks at a possum mother and her rabid babies, annoyed], frothing mouths that's full of rabies filled with cheer [pulls a hellhound with rabies close to her]! You'll be complete [completes a puzzle demon as the camera pans out]! It'll be so neat [a wrecking ball demon destroys the puzzle demon as Lute gives two thumbs up]! Our service can't be beat [in her bellhop uniform]! You'll be on easy street, yes [She hugs three demons, which include Baxter]! Life will be sweet [Her angel wings open up and a third eye opens on her forehead.] at the Happy Hoteeel [she twirls happily in flames as she jumps up, revealing a land made of candies and sweets behind her]! Yeah! ♫

[Lute ends the song, rather exhausted as everyone in the news station looks at her with disgust and disbelief.]

Top Hat Demon: Wow! ...That was shit!

[Everyone in the audience including Zestial & Zeezi begin to laugh at Lute. And this causes Lute to look crushed and devastated and slumps back down to her seat. There was a boo section in the news and the demons look uninterested]

Blue Flame Demon: *deadpan* Booooo!

Zestial: What in the Nine Circles makes you think that a single fucker in Hell would care about becoming good?! You have no proof that this little experiment even works! You expected people to become a better person at the snap of a finger. Just... because?! [He continues to laugh.]

Lute: Well, we have a patron already, who believes in our cause and he's shown incredible progress!

Zestial: [He feigns shock?] Oh? And who would that be?

Lute: [She tries to look smug and confident.] Oh, just someone named... Katie Killjoy.

Zeezi: That performer chick?

Zestial: [He turns to Zeezi menacingly.] You fucking would, wouldn't you, Zeezi?! [He turns back to Lute.] In any case, that's not even an accomplishment. I'm sure you could get that bitch to do anything with enough money and cocaine [He motions doing a handjob.] And she'll do anything.

Lute: Oh, I beg to differ! [She begins to count on her fingers] She's been behaved, clean, and out of trouble for two weeks now.

News Staff: Breaking News!

[Zestial shoves Lute off her desk.]

Zestial: We just received a word that a new player has entered the ongoing turf war! Let's go to the live feed.

[The live feed shows Katie stepping on an kitten Boi and throwing a grenade over at Husk with visible laughter in the background as Lute stares at the screen in defeat.]

Lute: oh fuck...

Katie Killjoy: (in the background): I'm a bad fucking bitch!

Zestial: "Oh fuck" indeed! It looks like the one who just joined the battle is none other than [He feigns a gasp] performer woman, Katie Killljoy [turns to Lute as he shakes his fist.] What a juicy coincidence! You must feel really stupid, right now.

[Zestial & Zeezi proceed to laugh at Lute. And they both do Jazz hands.]

Zestial & Zeezi: Ratings!

[Lute stares at the live feed in distress and attempts to block it from the audience's view.]

Lute: Don't watch this!

Zestial: Well, it sure looks like your little project is dead on arrival. [He looms over Lute.] Do say, how does it feel to be a total failure?

[everyone in the room start bursting into laughter again.]

Lute: Yeah, well... [She looks around] How does it feel that I got your pen, huh?! [She grabs Zestial's ballpen.] You uh..Bitch!

[Everybody instantly stops laughing while Zestial gives her the death stare]

Lute: [nervously] Ehehe... [She puts pen back down.] Oops.

[Zeezi off set. And Zestial turns into his demonic form as he looms over Lute from the shadows.]

[Black and blueish smoke transitions then reveals Katie and Angel fighting some Kitten bois.]

Angel Dust: Heyyy, thanks for the back up, Katie!

Katie Killjoy: Hahaha! [Angel fires a rocket launcher.] You kiddin' me? I haven't had this much fun in ages!

Angel Dust: [While he's launching another one of his bombs.] Okay, but where've you been? I thought you died or some shit.

Katie Killjoy: [As she's lighting a bomb and handing it to Angel.] Oh, i wish i was already! I've been staying at this crappy hotel on the other side of town. Some broad and her boy toy are letting me stay rent-free if i act nice and shit. [They both cover their heads as the explosion sets off behind them, then grin at each other as they jump into the field. And Katie Continues to shoot down Kitten Boiz with what seems to be a drum mag M1928 Thompson.] You know, no curse words, no fights, no pranks, no "problematic language", no "bad words", Her words, not mine. [She then steps on a broken tile, launching a Kitten boi airborne and shoots him from behind as he sighs again.] That crazy bitch and even crazier bastard are no fun! I've been clean for two weeks now.

Angel Dust: [in disbelief, while smiling.] What the fuuuck? Tho you don't look clean right now.

Katie Killjoy: [She looks at the leftover smudge on his finger.] Well, sort of clean. Just clean as you can get from a load of cocaine from an alleyway. [She gets chained and thrown aside by Husk.] Ohh!~ Harder, Daddy! [She raises her left eyebrow.]

Husk: [taking it seriously as he gasps.] Daughter?

[Katie lowers herbeyebrow as Ang kicks Husk to the side.]

Husk: Grr! You whores have no class! In a war, The side remembered is the side with the most style! [He adjusts his tie.]

Angel Dust: Or the side that ain't dead!

[Katie stands up and removes the chains restricting her.]

Katie Killjoy: While on the subject of "style", are you like, an actual kitten?

Husk: Oh! Well, that's none of your GOD DAMN BUSINESS! Now, is it?

Katie Killjoy: Heh. Cus a question. If i start petting you, will you purr and then leave?

[A sign that says "Loser" can be seen in the background pointing at Husk as a Kitten Boi acknowledges the roast.]

Husk: (enraged) I'm going to blow you to bits!

Katie Killjoy: [She eyes him up and down.] Hm, kinky little kitten!

Husk: Oh, not like that [A glowing sign points at Husk that says "Pussy".] Pervert! [knocks over a Kitten Boi.]

[Katie notices a Kitten Boi with a tentacle launcher which causes her to push Angel to the side out of fear. And she gets tangled up in all the tentacles.]

Husk: Not so cocky now, are we?!

Katie Killjoy: (unamused) Y'know, you really gotta watch what comes outta ya mouth. I've been making these sex jokes the whole [her limbs gets pulled on as Husk reveals a drill which jump starts.] TIME! [A set of spikes appear on her back.] And it's obvious ya ain't catchin' on. I mean, it's just [The spikes rip apart the tentacles. And she pulls out an M1928.] sad! [She shoots it at Husk.]

Angel Dust: Soo, ya' think you're gonna get in a lotta trouble for this?

Katie Killjoy: Eh, [She retracts the spikes on her back.] what's one little brawl gonna cause?

[Lute and Zestial are trying to duking it out on each other like it's some sort of WWE match while a fire alarm goes off in the background with Zeezi entering the scene, covered in flames.]

Zeezi: WHY WON'T ANYONE HELP ME?!

Angel Dust: Im so glad you haven't changed! [Slugs her on the arm.] You know you're my favorite girl to party with!

Katie Killjoy: You know it, Dustboy.

Angel Dust: [he takes out one last bomb.] You ready to finish this?

Katie Killjoy: [She takes out Thompson gun.] Of course i am flamethrower.

[Katie & Angel pounce onto Husk and his army as they prepare to clash, Lute & Zestial are still at each other's throats screaming, Zeezi is still on fire, screaming in agony. The camera shows all the characters present, screaming as the scene turns silent.]

[The royal family limousine can be seen driving back to the hotel. Lute can be seen hugging her knees and looking out the window when her jacket is ruined after Zestial attacked her, while Adam sits next to her, glaring furiously at Katie. Lute sighs as Adam's eye twitches at Katie Killjoy, who can be seen amusing herself by playing with the car window roller repeatedly.]

[Adam scrunches up his face.]

Katie Killjoy: [Finally notices Adam.]...What?

Adam: "What?", "WHAT?!" Do you know what you JUST DID?! [He rips a bit of his hair.]

Katie Killjoy: [He sighs.] I owed my boy buddy a solid! Isn't that a "redeeming quality"? [She does air quotes.] Helping friends with stuff? [She rolls her eyes.]

Adam: Not with turf wars that result in territorial genocide!

Katie Killjoy: Ehe, you win some, you lose a few hundred. Ehahahahahah! [She inhales.] It wasn't that bad, anyway. [She proceeds to play with the button of the car window roller. Adam throws an unfolded pocket knife at the window roller.]

Katie Killjoy: Aw, come on! I had to! [She brushes back some of her hair.] My credibility was on the line! I mean, what kind of reputation would I have if people found out I was tryna go clean? It just throws out my entire persona!

Adam: Your credibility? What about the hotel's?! [He gestures at a defeated Lute.] Your little stunt made us look like a mother fucking joke!

Katie Killjoy: [She scoffs.] No, no, no, bastard. Jokes are funny! I made you look... uh, sad! And pathetic! And...uh...And Like morons. Like an orphan... with no arms... or legs... Oh! With progeria! Oh great! Now I'm bummed thinkin' about it! [She starts looking around the limousine.] This thing have any wine?

Adam: Can you please just try to take this seriously?!

Katie Killjoy: [She flicks off a dust bunny.] Ugh, 'kay, I'll try. Just don't get your taco in a twist, baby! [She snaps finger at him while smiling.]

Adam: Was that you trying to be sexist or racist?!

Katie Killjoy: [groans.] Whatever pisses you off more. I don't give a fuck. Is there seriously no alcohol in here?!

Adam: [returns to sit next to Lute as he crosses his arms.] I'm gonna kill her.

Katie Killjoy: Too late, toots. Wait! Would that make me double dead? Hah, and where exactly do I go? To Double Hell? Hahahahahahahaha! Sorry, you're stuck with me - get used to it bitch. [She folds arms confidently.]

Adam: For fuck's sake, you bastard son of-!

Katie Killjoy: Listen, who cares if some jack-offs got hurt? Most of 'em are ugly freaks. Look around! [She looks out the limousine window, smirking.] You got a bunch a fuckin' Harlequin babies down here! [She laughs.]

Adam: You're one to talk, twig. [He smiles smugly.]

Katie Killjoy: Hey! [She motions to her body.] This body is flawless! Everyone wants some of me, and I've got the creepy fan letters to prove it!

[Takes letter from in between her braand reveals it to Adam that features a small picture of a dirty naked old man, who ironically has a "No Killjoy" tattoo, smothering his mouth on an Katie Killjoy body pillow and a message at the bottom saying "Show me your feet!! -Bryrin, #1 Fan/Critic".]

Adam: Grrr...

Lute: That was really uncool, y'know, Katie.

Adam: "Uncool"?! UNCOOL?! After that train-wreck, there is no way anyone is gonna stay at the hotel! [looks toward Katie Killjoy.] All thanks to [He points at Katie.] you and your selfish bullshit!

Katie Killjoy: Does that mean I don't have a free room anymore? [Adam motions "What do you think?" Katie snaps her fingers.] Ah...well, fuck.

Lute: Hey, come on. [She takes off her ruined jacket.] We don't know if things are over yet! Try and relax, Adam. [puts a hand on Adam's left shoulder.] I-it'll all be okay!

[Adam smiles at Lute softly.]

[The limousine arrives at the hotel as the hotel door opens, revealing a very old and dirty establishment.]

Adam: [He throws himself on the couch, facing the wall.] Ugh!

[Katie rummages through the fridge leaning by the wall and grabbing a box of Popsies.]

Katie Killjoy: Eh, it's probably a good idea to get some actual food in this place. Y'know, to feed all the wayward souls you got in here! Ahahaha! Ahaha...! eh... ah... [She closes the fridge door as he tries to comfort Lute but decides to back off.]

[Lute exits the hotel and tries to contact Lilith.]

Lute: [She sighs.] Heya...Lilith...I know I keep calling and you must be busy... Really busy... But, um, the interview didn't go well, [She shrinks to her knees.] and... I don't know if I'm ever going to make a difference [She starts tearing up as she wipes it off her face.] I don't know what I'm doing. I could really use some advice... I... I think people were right about me... Ahah, oof. Eh, anyway... [she wipes her face once more.] I'll stop talking before this gets long. [She stands up.] Thanks for listening to me...bye...

[Lute walks back in and leans by the door in defeat as a sudden knock can be heard from the other side of the door, surprising Lute. Lute contemplates on whether or not to open the door but decides to open it anyway.]

[The mysterious figure watching her performance from before can be seen standing before her and Charlie, knowing who he is, reacts with extreme shock.]

Vox: Hell- [He gets door slammed in front of him.]

[Lute looks to the side for a brief moment before opening the door again.]

Vox: -o!

Lute: [She slams door in front of his face once more.] Hey, Adam?

Adam: [annoyed.] Whaaaat?

Lute: Uhm...Well...The Tv Demon is at the door!

Adam: [He sits up shocked.] What?!

Katie Killjoy: [She takes out the popsicle from her mouth.] Uh... the who?

Lute: What should I do?!

Adam: Uh, well- Don't let him in!

[Lute decides to disregard Adam's advice once more and opens the door for Vox.]

Vox: Can i speak now?

Lute: You can.

Vox: [He reaches hand out.] Vox! My pleasure to be meet you, sweetheart! [She pulls Lute towards him.] Quite a pleasure! [He lets himself in.] Excuse my sudden visit, but I saw your fiasco on that news tv show, and I just couldn't resist! What a performance! Why, I haven't been that entertained since i beaten that bastard enemy of mine down here. Hahahahaha, [He plays with his phone staff.] What a little prick.

Adam: [He holds his harpoon towards his chest.] Stop right there, bastard son of a bitch! I know your game and I'm not gonna let you hurt anyone here, you pompous cheesy [Katie's head pops in, unamused] Video show shitlord!

Vox: [He uses finger to move the harpoon away.] Dear boy, if I wanted to hurt anyone here... [He turns into his full demon form.] I would've done so already...

[Lute and Adam are staring at him perturbed as the distortion ends.]

Vox: No! No. I'm here because I want to help!

Lute: Say what, now?

Vox: Help! Hahaha, hello? Is this thing on? [He taps his phone staff.] Testing, testing!

Vox's staff: Well, I heard you loud and clear!

Lute: Um, you want to help? With...?

Vox: [He teleports behind the two.] This ridiculous thing you're trying to do! This hotel! I want to help you run it.

Lute: Buuut... why?

Vox: Hahaha, why does anyone do anything? Sheer, absolute boredom! I've lacked inspiration for decades. My work became mundane, lacking focus, [He shoves Adam offscreen.] aimless! I've come to crave a new form of entertainment! Hahaha!

Lute: Does getting into a fistfight with a reporter count as entertainment...?

Vox: Hahaha! It's the purest kind, my dear: Reality! True passion! After all, the world is a stage and the stage is a world of entertainment. All thte reality shows are already scripted. It's boring now.

Lute: So, does this mean you think it's possible to rehabilitate a demon?

Vox: Hahahahaha! [He shakes hand in front of her.] Of course not! That's wacky nonsense! [He shakes hischead back and forth.] Redemption, oh the non-existent humanity! No, no, no, no. I don't think there's anything left that could save such loathsome sinners! [He looks over to Adam who is offended and Katie just shrugs at What Vox said.] The chance given was the life they lived before, the punishment is this! [He puts his arms out, gesturing the entirety of Hell.] There is no undoing what is done!

Lute: So, then....Why do you wanna help me if you don't believe in my cause?

Vox: Consider it an investment in ongoing entertainment for myself! [He pulls Lute close to him and twirls her.] I wanna watch the scum of the world struggle to climb up the hill of betterment only to repeatedly trip and tumble down to the fiery pit of failure!

Lute: [She removes his hand from her back in suspicion.] Riiiight.

Vox: Yes, indeedy! [He grabs her by the waist and drags her offscreen.] I see big things coming your way and who better to help you than I? [He trails off.]

Katie Killjoy: So uh...what's the deal with Smiley TV screen over there?

Adam: Wait, you've never heard of him before? You've been here longer than me!

[Katie just shrugs cluelessly.]

Adam: The TV Demon. One of the most powerful beings Hell has ever seen?

Katie Killjoy: [Just shrugs a second time.] Eh, not big on politics.

Adam: Ugh! [He leans in on Katie as he begins his story.] Decades ago, Vox manifested in Hell,

[Scene changes to a visual presentation of Adam's story regarding Vox.]

Adam: And just seemingly overnight. He began to topple Overlords who have been dominant for centuries. Making overlords dissapear, left and right. That kind of raw power had never been harnessed by a mortal soul before. Then, he broadcasted his carnage all throughout Hell just so everyone could witness his ability, there were no visual, but only screams could be heard, but not seeing it on television. And sinners started calling him "The TV Demon", as lazy as that is. Many have speculated what unimaginable force enabled him to rival our world's most ancient and destructive evils. But one thing's for sure: He's an unpredictable source of danger, a wicked spirit of mystery, and a violent monster of chaos, the likes of which we can't risk getting involved with unless we want to end up erased!

Katie Killjoy: You done now? [She Laughs dryly.] He looks like a mint tv pimp guy.

Adam: Well, I don't trust him!

Katie Killjoy: To be fair, do you trust any other man? Any other men? Men?

[Adam grabs Lute by the shoulder.]

Adam: Lute, you gotta listen to me. You can't believe this creep! He isn't just a happy face! He's a deal-maker! Pure evil! He can't be redeemed! ...And is most likely looking for a way to destroy everything we're trying to do!

Lute: I... [She sighs.] we don't know that! Look, I know he's bad, and I know he probably doesn't wanna change, but the whole point of this is to give people a chance! [Vox inspects a portrait of the royal family.] To have faith things will be better! How can I turn someone away? I can't. It goes against everything I'm trying to do. Everything I believe in. [She puts hands on Adam's shoulders.] Just... trust me. I can take care of myself!

Adam: Lute, whatever you do, do not make a deal with him!

[Vox makes a gesture with his hand, seemingly focusing on Adam.]

Lute: Don't worry, I picked up one thing from my past. "You don't take shit from demons!" [She walks off to where Vox is.] Okay, so, Vox. You're sketchy as fuck and you clearly see what I'm trying to do here as a joke. [As Lute turns away, glowing red symbols start to appear beside Vox which quickly disappear after Lute turns back to Vox.] But, I don't. I think everyone deserves a second chance. A second chance to prove that they can be better. So, I'm taking your offer to help. On the condition that there be no... [She makes gestures with hands.] tricks or voodoo strings attached. [Vox rolls his eyes at that last statement.]

Vox: So, it's a deal, then? [He twirls his staff and presents his hand for a handshake as electric blue energy bursts throughout the hotel.]

Lute: [She refuses his handshake.] Nope! No... No shaking! No deals! I... hmm... As an ex-exorcist and as someone who can kill you, I, uh, hereby order that you help with this hotel. For as long as you desire. [A howling wolf can be heard in the background as lute looks over to Adam for approval.] Does that sound fair?

Vox: [He rubs his chin.] Hmm... [He retracts his staff.] Fair enough!

Lute: [She sighs in relief.] Cool beans.

Vox: Hmm hm hmm hmm... [He continues to hum while looking around as he stops in front of Adam.] Smile, my dear! [He tickles the underside of Adam's chin.] You know you're never fully dressed without one! [Walks away as he continues humming.] So where is your hotel staff?

Lute: Uh, well-

[Camera pans to Adam who's staring at Vox dead in the eyes.]

Vox: Ohohoho, you're going to need more than that. [walks towards Katie Killjoy.] And what can you do, my effeminate fellow?

Katie Killjoy: I can suck your dick, you pretty boy!

[Mic feedback can be heard in the background as Vox tries to process what he was just offered.]

Vox: HAH! No. I have a boyfriend.

Katie Killjoy: [She scoffs.] Your loss.

Vox: Well, this just won't do! [He takes out his mic staff.] I suppose I can cash in a few favors to liven things up.

[At the snap of his finger, a new fireplace has replaced the hotel's worn down one as he approaches it and picks up the mysterious figure covered in soot, which then opens its eyes and stares at the trio behind him.]

[Vaggie poofs off the soot from her body.]

Vox: This little darling is named, Vagatha!

Vaggie: [She drops to the floor, unaffected.] Hi, I'm Vaggie! It's so nice to meet you all! I haven't made new friends in a while. [She eyes the three.] Why are there only two women? [She lifts Lute up with no effort.] Are there any other women here?! [She puts Lute down.] I'm sorry, that's just rude. Really sorry. [She looks around.] Oooh, man! This place is filthy! It really needs a lady's touch! [She grabs a spider and crushes it.] Which is weird because there are two ladies in here, no offense by the way. [She stares off as she takes out a feather duster.] Oh, my gosh! This is awful! [She speed cleans throughout the hotel.] Nope! Nope! Nope! Nope! [She spots a cockroach and stabs it with a sewing pin.] Nope!

[The four stare at Vaggie as a voice coming from an unknown demon can be heard nearby.]

Tom Trench: [Tom lays his cards down the table.] Hah! Read 'em and weep, boys! Full Ho- [Some demonic illusions and voices distort the surroundings temporarily.] -tel? What the fuck is this? [He looks around and spots Vox, eliciting an angry hiss as he points at him.] You!

Vox: Ah, Thomas, my good friend! Glad you could make it!

Tom Trench: Don't you "Thomas" me, you son of a bitch! I was about to win the whole damn pot! [the jackpot disappears into nothingness.]

Vox: Good to see you too!

Tom Trench: [He facepalms angrily.] What the fuck do you want with me this time...?

Vox: My friend, I am doing some charity work so I took it upon myself to volunteer your services! I hope that's okay!

Tom Trench: Are you shittin' me?!

Vox: Hmm... No, I don't think so!

Tom Trench: [He shoves Vox off.] You thought it'd be some kind of big fucking riot just to pull me out of nowhere?! You think I'm some kind of fucking clown?!

Vox: [He grins as if he's about to laugh.] Maybe!

Tom Trench: I ain't doing no fucking charity job.

[Vox teleports behind Tom.]

Vox: Well, I figured you would be the perfect face to man the front desk of this fine establishment! [He gestures towards the bar he made out of his magic.] With your charming smile [he pulls Tom's lips into a forced smile.] and welcoming energy, this job was made for you! Don't worry my friend, [He walks over to the bar, revealing the soles of his shoes to have deer prints.] I can make this more welcoming! ...If you wish. [He makes a bottle of "Cheap Booze" appear out of nowhere.]

Tom Trench: [He stares at the booze for a second.] What? You think you can buy me with a wink [He winks sarcastically.] and some cheap booze?! [He grabs the booze and looks at it.] ...Well, you can! [He downs the booze.]

Adam: Hey, hey! Hey, hey, hey! No! No bar, no alcohol! This is supposed to be a place that discourages sin! Not some kind of mouth…brothel…man cave!

[Katie launches her at Adam from somewhere.]

Katie Killjoy: SHUT UP! SHUT! UP! We [She points to the bar with her fingers] are keeping this! [She starts flirting with Husk.] Hey~

Husk: Im not interested in you.

Katie Killjoy: Oh what a shame~

Lute: Oh, my gosh! Welcome to the Happy Hotel! You are going to love it here! [She tries to give Tom a handshake.]

Tom Trench: [while he reaches for his booze.] I lost the ability to love years ago. [He continues to down his booze.]

Vox: So, whaddaya think?

Lute: This is amazing! [She rubs her cheeks excitedly.]

Adam: [With crossed arms.] It's... okay.

Vox: [He reels the two towards him.] Hahaha! This is going to be very entertaining! [He then lets go of Adam and summons a fireball, launching it to the hotel ceiling just so he could distract Lute fast enough for him to shove Adam offscreen. He dresses himself in a tux and matching top hat.] ♫You have a dream! [He twirls Lute and dresses her up.] You wish to tell! [He turns to Adam who's now on the floor, glaring at Vox.] And it's just laughable [He turns back to Lute and tosses her mid-air.] But, hey, kid, what the hell?♫ [The background behind Lute changes to neon colored lights featuring two apples and a skull.] [As he catches Lute by the hand as they both tap dance together.] 'Cause you're one-of-a-kind! A charming angel belle! [The two slide down the railing of the stairs.] Now, let's give these burning fools a place to dwell! [She resses up the rest of the hotel staff.] Take it, boys! ♫

[Shadow demons appear from the floorboards and begin playing their instruments as Adam tries to talk to Lute who is having too much fun. Vox pulls him in with him and the others as his shadow demons surround them.]

Shadow Demons: Boo!

Vox: ♫Haha! Inside of every demon is a lost cause! [He puts a fedora on Katie's head as she snaps his fingers back at Vox.] But we'll dress 'em up for now, with just a smile! ♫ [He puts a hat and fur on Adam and slaps his butt. He throws the accessories to the floor, glaring after him.]

Shadow Demons: ♫ With a smile! ♫

Vox: ♫And we'll chlorinate this cesspool with some old redemption flair! [He kicks off skull which Vaggie rushes in and cleans off.] And show these simpletons some proper class and style! [He summons a shadow clone of himself.] ♫

Shadow Demons: ♫ Class and style! ♫

Vox: ♫[He snaps away his shadow.] Oh! Here below the ground, [he twirls Lute and pinches her cheeks.] I'm sure your plan is sound! [He holds hands with Lute as they both twirl.] They'll spend a little time, down at this Hazbin Ho-

[The hotel door explodes, ending the music and knocking Vaggie away Lute, Vox, Katie, and Adam look outside.]

[Husk's war ship has made an appearance outside the hotel.]

Husk: Hah! Well, well, well. Look who it is harboring the twig freak. We meet yet again, Vox!

Vox: Do I know you?

Husk: [His ego deflates.] Oh, yes you do!  And this time, I have the element of- [He pulls a lever.] SURPRISE! Ahaha! I'm so evil!

[With a snap of a finger, an otherworldly dimensional portal opens with tentacles and shadow demons emerging from it, destroying Husk's' ship while he is inside. Vox then finishes it off as he clenches his fist with a few drops of blood dripping off his hand. Vox is then grinning menacingly in satisfaction for a moment as the others look at him in shock and horror.]

Vox: [To breaking the tension.]...Well, I'm starved! Who wants some waffles? My mother once showed me a wonderful recipe for waffles. In fact, it nearly killed her! Hahaha! You could say the kick was right out of Hell! Ohoho, I'm on a roll! Yes, sir! This is the start of some real changes down here! The game is set! Now...

[Vox uses his magic to change the sign atop the hotel from "Happy Hotel" to "Hazbin Hotel".]

Vox: (sinisterly) ...Stay tuned. Hahaha...!

[Later.]

[Husk is revealed to have survived the beating served by Vox along with Kitten boi #23]

Kitten boi #23: Now will you shoot me with your ray gun?

[Husk collapses of exhaustion as the episode ends.]

(Overture coming soon.)

Chapter Text

[Begins with a depiction of the universe, where Heaven lies in the sky with its golden gates shining. The narrator, Lute, tells a story of how entities called Angels made the universe.]

Lute: Once upon a time, there was a glowing city protected by beautiful, golden gates, known as Heaven. It was ruled by beings of Pure light, Angels that worshiped good and shielded all from evil. Lucifer was one of these angels. He was a dreamer with fantastical ideas for All of creation. But he was seen as a troublemaker by the elders of Heaven. For they felt his way of thinking was dangerous to the order of their world. So, he watched as the angels began to expand the universe in their ways. From the dust of Earth, they created Adam and Lilith, equals as the first of Mankind. [The angels then created a planet called Earth, where they produced the first humans, Adam and Lilith.] But, despite this, Adam demanded control, and Lilith refused to submit to his will. And because of this. She fled the Garden. Drawn in by her fierce independence, Lucifer found her, and the two rebellious dreamers fell deeply in love. [Lilith rejects Adam and flees, where she meets Lucifer and falls in love.] Together, they wished to share the magic of free will with humanity, offering the Fruit of Knowledge to Adam's new bride, Eve, who gladly accepted. [The two came to Adam's new bride, Eve, to offer her an apple from a tree to bring free will to humanity.] But this gift came with a curse. For with this single act of disobedience, evil finally found its way into Earth. [The earth shatters by darkness unleashed by them.]
With it, a new realm of darkness and sin. And the order Heaven worked to maintain was shattered. As punishment for their reckless act, Heaven cast Lucifer and his love into the dark pit he had created, never allowing him to see the good that came from humanity, only the cruel and the wicked. [The angels banished Lucifer and Lilith from Heaven and Earth and into the depths of the black and dark realm now called Hell.] Ashamed, Lucifer lost his will to dream. [While Lucifer stagnated, Lilith thrived and brought Hell to new heights, leading the angels to start the yearly Extermination as population control for the overpopulated demons and sinners.] But Lilith thrived, empowering demonkind with her voice and songs. And as the numbers of Hell grew, so did its power. Threatened by this, Heaven made a truly heartless decision. That every year, they would send down an army, an Extermination, to ensure Hell and its sinners could never rise against them, however, their old leader, Adam, never knew about any of this, and continuesly questioning this, it caused Adam to fall to Hell. But Lilith's hope still remained nevertheless. Never losing hope. And her dreams were passed down to her most trusted friends and family.

[Lute finally finishes narrating, she closes a book titled "The Story of Hell" and looks out to Pentagram City.]

Lute: Don't worry, Lilith. I'll make you very proud. [Lute looks out the window to Pentagram City burning to the ground, just as Adam comes into the room.]

Adam: Lute?

[The key Lute is holding transforms into KeeKee who scampers away, and Lute turns to Adam in surprise.]

Lute: Aah! Oh, shit. Did you hear all that? And... How long were you standing here?..

Adam: Uh, I was right here. I heard everything. [He points his thumb to the doorway.]

Lute: Sorry about this... I get pre-tty worked up after an extermination happens. Makes me remember my past...This story helps me calm down...

Adam: [He chuckles.] I know babe. But, don't worry, I enjoy your theatrics. But my question. Are you okay? [He sits down with Lute.]

Lute: I'm fine. Just... thinking, ya' know? Stuff...

Adam: Did you hear from Lilith yet?

Lute: No...Sadly not.

Adam: Oof… how long has it been since we last saw her again?

Lute: Not that long, only...seven....years, of doing something important, I'm sure of it! But, this kingdom was something she really cared about. Something I care about now...

Adam: Well, at least you know...you aren't alone. Im here for you.

Lute: I just hope what I'm trying to do here will work out in the end...

Adam: It will work. Because i have faith in you.

[KeeKee leaps into Lute's arms as Adam stands up.]

Adam: Alright, come on. Vox says he has something to show us. [He walks out the room.]

[As Adam leaves, a loud bell rings throughout the city, and Lute turns to the Bell Tower at Heaven Embassy. She looks on with sadness, knowing that it's another year before the Extermination comes again.]

[The scene turns static before it fixes itself to reveal a sinner stabbing another demon to death with a knife before Vox caught their attention.]

Vox: (the camera turns on with static) Well, hello there, you wayward Sinner! Do you like blood, violence, and depravity of a sexual nature? Oh who am i asking? Well of course you do, you're in Hell of all places! But what would you say if I told you there was a place you can stay at, that had none of that?

[As the camera rolls, scenes switches from the front of the Hazbin Hotel.]

Vox: Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel, a misguided path to redemption! Founded five days ago by Lilith's delusional little adopted daughter, but not really actual daughter, Luella!

[Lute is on camera and she waves at it before Katie Killjoy comes into view, putting two-fingers over the head prank behind her.]

Vox: Come place your fate in her inexperienced little hands, as she tries to work through her issues by fixing you!

[Then cuts to Lute's interview with Zestial Morde, then a picture of her crying as she faces away from Lilith who was in the opposite direction under a spotlight. Then her showing her plan via poster to a confused crowd.]

Vox: Here we offer fun things, such as somewhat functional staff and 24-hour pest control. [Tom, who was clearly drunk, passes out on the ground as Vaggie tries to stab and chase after a bug.] Custom rooms, and just look at this tacky parlor! Amazing! Enjoy riveting conversation with our singular resident. [Katie Killjoy, with a support beam falling close to KeeKee, scaring the demon cat before running away, flips Vox off.] Wow! All this, and more at the Hazbin Hotel! [A poorly made drawing of the hotel before the commercial ends.] Your desperate last attempt at salvation starts here! [He turns off the television.] So, what do you think of this?

[On the couch, Lute and Adam were surprised of the commercial being poorly misleading and very offensive to their nature, that Adam throws a fit at Vox.]

Adam: I'm sorry...but...What the fuck was that?!

Lute: Uh, Yeah. One note, Vox, I mean, first off, thank you so so very much for making this ad, seriously, amazing, but um... maybe the tone is a bit... off? We want people to want to come here. This makes it look, um...How do i say this?..

Adam: Bad. The word you're looking for is bad. Very bad.

Vox: Funny. I wanted it to be hilarious.

Adam: It didn't even explain anything about how we're trying to save demons from the exterminations, which is the whole fucking point of this hotel!

Lute: Adam is right, Vox, the commercial was to let sinners know we are trying to help them.

Vox: Well, my dear, I haven't been active in Hell for some time now, and everyone remembers me from my talk shows, you know, the proper type of show to express oneself. But you didn't want any of that. You wanted an advertisement. [He taps the television twice with his staff.] So, I had a little fun with it.

Adam: Oh, fun? You had a little fun with it? [He stands up onto the couch.] Well, this is not what we want to represent us and the hotel. When you showed up here a week ago, you told us you would help run this hotel. Instead, you're just making fun of us and mocking us. Nobody is gonna want to come to a place that a powerful overlord like you thinks is just a waste of time.

[Katie raises her hand from the couch, catching everyone's attention.]

Adam: What is it you want now?!

Katie Killjoy: If you're filming a commercial, can I suggest you take better advantage of the very sexy, and talented celebrity you have right here? [She takes a bottle with one arm before pointing her other arm at herself, but Adam doesn't like it.]

Adam: Katie, you're a porn performer.

Katie Killjoy: A famous porn performer, add that, I'll have the horniest fuckers, knocking these walls down to get in.

Adam: We are not filming a porn as a commercial.

Katie Killjoy: Why not? Sex sells, doesn't it? I swear if you film me goin' at it with mister fancy tv screen-creepy talker right here, you'd be rollin' in participants willing to stay at this tacky hotel. [As she was explaining, Vox appears right beside the couch next to her and laughs with amusement.]

Vox: Haha! Never going to happen! I already have someone else in my life.

Lute: Katie, I really appreciate you wanting to use your um..."special" skills to, um, attract folks to the hotel, and help us, but I really, really don't want to exploit you in that way.

Katie Killjoy: Oh, please, little babydoll. My body was made to be exploited. I got the arms, I got the stamina, I got the hands. I got the lung capacity. (laughs). Oh, I got the fingers. The gag reflex, the holes, the tits.

[Lute chuckles nervously until Lute's phone rings from Lilith.]

Lute: Hold that thought! I'll be right back in a minute.

Katie Killjoy: I could keep going all night, baby.

[While Katie drinks her beer, Lute breathes nervously and answers the call.]

Lute: Hi? Lili?

[As Lute take the phone call, the scene switches to Adam, Katie, and Vox.]

Katie Killjoy: Hey, I got a question to ask. If freaky flat screen tv face over here is so powerful, then why can't he just make people stay here?

Vox: Oh, trust me, [Smiles in a mischievously creepy look]-I can.

Tom Trench: Why do you people think I'm here? Do you people actually think I'd be cleaning bottles and listening to you fucks bitch and moan all the time if he wasn't forcing me be here?

[As Tom cleans a bottle, Vaggie pops up from behind the counter with a hand raised.]

Vaggie: I like being forced to stay here.

Tom Trench: Keep that to yourself, Vag.

Katie Killjoy: What? You don't love being here with me, trenchcoat?

Tom Trench: Call me trenchcoat again and I'll jam that bottle up your hole.

Katie Killjoy: Kinky. Come on, keep talking dirty to me.

Adam: [He sighs angrily.] Katie. Let Tom do his job. And, no, we can't force sinners to stay here. They need to choose to.

Katie Killjoy: Well I'm choosing to be here and I think this is all stupid. We're in hell, prick. That's kind of the end of the road, isn't it?

Adam: Well, Maybe it doesn't have to be. Just because nobody has made it out of here before doesn't mean it's not possible.

[Katie places a hand on Adam's shoulder, giving him a deadpan expression while the latter makes the same one.]

Katie Killjoy: Hey, whatever means I can keep crashing here rent-free. It's expensive to buy cocaine nowadays.

[The scene comes back to Lute, and after the phone call, she seemed really happy with the news Lilith brought to her.]

Lute: Yeah, I can totally, yeah. I'll head over there right away. Okay? [Lute hangs up the phone and gasp in excitement.] Yes... FUCK YES! [Lute giggles in excitement when she hears about the news until she calls Adam in gibberish, waving very franticly that freaks Adam out.] ADAM HOLY SHIT! COMEHERENOWPLEASE!!!

Adam: Ah! What?

[Lute waves him to come to her for some exciting news.]

Lute: [She mumbles excitedly.] get over here!

[Adam sighs happily and comes to Lute while she is jumping around in a very happy mood. As Katie drinks in the background, Adam meets Lute behind.]

Adam: What's going on?

[Lute breathes in and out to calm her nerves so she can explain, but she was explaining so fast due to her excitement.]

Lute: Lilith just called me, and she said thrat the leader of the Angel Army wants to meet. She asked if I could go instead of her, because she is busy.

[Lute hyperventilates and grabs Adam to get up close. Adam, however, was confused since the Angels were already done with their extermination and won't be back for another year.]

Adam: But-but, the extermination just happened. What could they want this soon after-

[As Adam went on, Lute was in the mood to get her hotel project to work, and remains hopeful that she starts singing.]

Lute: ♫I can do this! I just know it! I'll get Heaven behind my plans!♫

Adam: Lute, hold on...wait...

Lute: ♫There's just no way I could blow this. Not this once-in-a-lifetime chance!♫

Adam: It's just gonna be a meeting

Lute: ♫To change their minds. And touch their hearts. Or... whatever other angels have!♫

Adam: This could be bad...

Lute: ♫Cheer up, Adam! This could be good! Something tells me that today will be a happy day in Hell!♫

Adam: Okay, but just don't... sing to them.

[Just before Adam could warn her, Katie, Vox, Vaggie, and Keekee were already at the open door where they can see Lute singing out in the destroyed Pentagram City, as Katie turns back to Adam still drinking from a bottle.]

Katie Killjoy: That bitch is halfway down the street!

Adam: Is she-?

Katie Killjoy: Oh, she's dancin' to 'em alright!

Adam: Ugh, no...

[The scene cuts to Lute making her way down the street, oblivious to the destruction and bodies of dead demons everywhere as she continues to sing her song.]

Lute: ♫It's a warm, fuzzy feeling. That walks through the air. Every street so revealing. It's hard not to stare! ♫ [Lute comes to a window of a sex dungeon where a Hellhound is humping against an imp wearing a sadomasochism mask. They notice her, and Lute awkwardly flees before continuing to sing.] It's a world so appealing it beats anywhеre. If you don't mind the smell....♫ [She accidentally steps on a dead shark demon that was releasing a very bad smelly fume into her nose. She cautiously avoids the corpse and presses on the street.] It's a happy day in Hell!♫

[Lute waves at a demon who was holding a newspaper before she catches his attention, revealing himself to be a meth addict with a spoon full of meth.]

Lute: Hi, mister!

(Demon: Go fuck yourself!)

(One demon opens his window, revealing his apartment on fire.)

Demon #1: ♫There's an endless trash fire that's burning my soul.♫

(Lute: Hello!)

Demon #2: ♫And a ton of barbed wire to shove in his hole!♫

(Lute: Ah, excuse me!)

Demon #3: ♫Doing what is required, we all have our role.♫

Sinner #1: ♫I'm not doin' well!♫

Demons: ♫It's another shitty day in Hell!♫

[Lute climbs on the trunk of the destroyed car and faces the other direction.]

Lute: ♫If I can show them the dream I've dreamed. That any soul can change!♫

(From the Hotel, Adam comes into the watchtower, as if he's calling out to his girlfriend.)

(Adam: ♫Those angels' minds are hard to change.♫)

Lute: ♫Then they will know everyone can be redeemed. From the evil to the strange!♫

(Adam: ♫They're bloodthirsty and deranged!♫)

Lute: ♫I can hear all their stories. The lost and displaced. And I know that they're more of an acquired taste. But! if I open the door and I give them a place. At my Hazbin Hotel. It'll be a happy day in Hell!♫

[A truck comes by, and Lute hitches a ride from behind so she can get around the city such as the porn studios, and the Cannibal Town .]

Lute: ♫ From the porn studio. Where the porn addicts go. To watch award-winning demon bukkake shows! To the Cannibal Town. Where they don't wear a frown 'cause.♫ [She gets shot in the eye with blood from one of the corpses that the cannibals were eating on.] Holy shit! Ew, my gosh! WHY?! ♫And I don't give a crow that. His brain's got in my eye! Cause I know I can spare them. From Heaven's genocide!. I can do this, I just know it! ♫

(Sinner #1: ♫There's an endless trash fire that's burning my soul.♫)

Lute: ♫I'll get Heaven behind my plans! There's just no way I could blow it.♫

(Sinner #2: I kinda like the barbed wire that's shoved in my hole.)

Lute: ♫Not this once-in-a-lifetime chance!. To change their minds.♫

[Right in the moment, a slug with a trenchcoat comes into picture, exhibiting his nudist body in front of Lute, which creeps her out.]

Trenchcoat Demon: ♫And touch my parts!♫

Lute: Uh... No thank you. I'm just gonna... ♫Fulfill my destiny!

(Trenchcoat Demon: Your loss, bitch!)

Lute: ♫I can already tell! Today is gonna bе a fuckin' happy day in Hell!♫

[Lute has finally gotten to right where she wants to be, the Heaven Embassy with the watchtower. She opens the door to peek inside.]

Lute: Hello! [Her voice echoes. And she enters through the door and finds the whole embassy deserted. She walks to the front desk to check in.] Hello? [Her voice echoes in the building.] Creepy...

[Lute comes to the front desk with no one but a single bell. She taps the bell to ring it, and at the instant, a golden scroll and feather ink pen floats from above over to her.]

Lute: Oh, okay... [She signs the paper.] Also very creepy...

[The scroll and feather flies up before disappearing. Right then, the twin doors slide open to show Lute the meeting room, and she enters inside the dark room with no one around.]

Lute: Uh...hello? Is anyone here?

[The lights suddenly switched on, revealing two angels at the end of the room, with one being a exorcist lieutenant, Cherri Bomb and the big boss leader of the Angel Army, Pentious, who is eating an apple in his hand.]

Sir Pentious: 'Ssssup!

Lute: Holy, shit! [She immediately fell down after getting surprised by the sudden appearance of two angels in the room. She gets back up and readjusts herself to introduce herself properly.] Oh, im sorry. Hi, I'm Lute. My mo-well...Queen of Hell...asked me if I could meet you.

Sir Pentious: Yeah, I know about it.

Lute: Okay, well. It's very nice to be finally meeting you.

Sir Pentious: Totally. It's nice to meet you, too. [He reaches over to give Lute a handshake, and as she was about to shake his hand, her hand slips right through, revealing Pentious to be a hologram, fizzing on and off after being touched, which freaks Lute out.] Ha! I fucking got you. [He turns to Cherri.] Did you see that? [Cherri nods once.] Ha. Now that's good shit.

[Lute was trying to get something straight with Charlie being a hologram.]

Lute: Uh...so, wait. You aren't here?

Sir Pentious: No, you think I'd come down there? [He laughs.] No, I mean, I love the vibe, totally, I love your tunes, and i love your clothes too. Pretty fucking hardcore and rad and all, don't get me wrong. But! it's such a bummer! man. Everything down there's just so "eugh", ya know? [She chuckles.] Ew. Haha.

Lute: Right. So, I'm happy we've got this opportunity to meet. There's a project that I've been working on that I really want to talk to you about-

[Pentious puts his finger on Lute's lips to quiet her down for a moment.]

Sir Pentious: Hey, hey, hey, hey, slow down. We've got time. How about we get to know each other a little. Introducing each other. Ya get me? How about lunch? You hungry? I got you. [He takes the bowl of apples he's been eating toward Lute.] Here's my personal favorite. You'll love it.

Lute: Ah, oh...Uhm...thanks. [She went to take an apple, but her hand past right through them, also revealing to be a hologram, as they fizz on and off from the touch, and Pentious laughs.]

Sir Pentious: I got you again, bitch! [She laughs.] Fuckin' hilarious!

[Lute makes a small unamused chuckle alongside Pentious's hyper laughter.]

[The scene cuts back to the Hazbin Hotel, where the workers and residents are summoned by Adam to discuss their poorly misleading commercial. Katie is constantly looking at Tom with seductive gaze while Tom is glaring daggers at her.]

Adam: Okay, so, Lute is dealing with something very very important right now, so while she's away, we are making a new commercial. One that represents her vision and what we're doing here. So, we need a camera. [He turns to Vox.] Vox? [Vox snaps his fingers to conjure up a camera for Adam; however, the camera is a folding-type old photography camera from the 1930s with no recording films at that time. Adam is unamused.] A video camera? One your head will look like once i stab you if you don't do what i ask for.

Vox: Hmmm. [He adheres to Adam's request and snaps his fingers again, conjuring up a video camera that's poorly used with pieces of tape stuck together.]

Adam: Alright! Let's do this!

[The camera switches into the point of view of the video camera recording the bar scene, with Tom behind the counter reading a script in his claws and Katie sitting on a bar stool. The camera whirrs as it brings the two into focus.]

Adam: And… Action!

[Tom carefully reads the lines on his script, bringing the script closer to read.]

Tom Trench: "Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel. Can I help you with anything?"

Katie Killjoy: "I've been a bad girl, and I need a big, strong daddy to put me in my place…on the path to redemption!"

[Tom groans with displeasure and read the script again.]

Tom Trench: "Well, you have come-"

Katie Killjoy: (moaning) "Oh, yes!"

TomTrench: (bored) …"to the right place."

[Adam has had it, and stops the recording.]

Adam: [Inhales angrily.] Cut! Enough. Okay, Katie, I need you to be less horny if that's even possible for you, and Tom, can you maybe not have the script in front of your face? And try to put emotion into your acting.

Tom Trench: (Angrily) I ain't no actor! I can't memorize this shit!

Katie Killjoy: Well, we could improv this shit, baby. (gets closer to Angel's face) Rrawwr. (purrs seductively)

[Tom gets irritated by Katie and shoves her off the counter painfully hard.]

Tom Trench: Whoops. [He  grabs a bottle and drinks it.]

Adam: Tom! Come on!

[Cutting back to Lute's meeting with Pentious, she's looked bored, propping herself on her elbows while listening to Pentious exaggeratingly boasting about himself and his sex life.]

Sir Pentious: So, I was playin' this gig, and for some fuckin' reason, this chick bumps into me, and i was like "How dare you bump into me?! Do you know who i am?! I am The Great Sssir Pentious. The new, and better fuckin' leader of the exorcists!" You understand me, don't you titty haver? [Cherri Bomb nods her head.] [And Pentious eats a mouthful of apples sloppily.] So, anyway, that's how i met this girl right here [He points a fonger at Cherri.] So. Anyways, we got together. What'd you do this weekend?

Lute: Wait, your name is Pentious? Like "Sir Pentious". That has an awful ring to "Serpent" and-…Oh…. [She puts the pieces together.] That explains so much.

Sir Pentious: I know. I fucking rock. [He holds up her hand in the sign of the horns.]

[Lute brushes off the awkwardness from Pentious and gets to her subject of matter in hand.]

Lute: Well, Pentious, sir...Mr. Pentious, sir...

Sir Pentious: Call me "Double dicks"

Lute: Pentious. You seem like a smart- [she pauses] …well, stand up guy.

Sir Pentious: [While picking his teeth.] Uh-huh.

Lute: And I know you are the leader of the angels. And you are a big thinker, a revolutionary. A- A genius!

Sir Pentious: [Despite his nonchalant attitude, his ego grows.] I mean, your words, babe.

Lute: Who would really love to put his name on something.

Sir Pentious: Are you kidding me? I fucking love putting my name on something! Something's the best!

Lute: It's a solution to our biggest problem!

Sir Pentious: Oh yeah, herpes. Yeah, that's a bitch.

Lute: No! Our... other biggest problem.

Sir Pentious: Oh…uh..ugly people? Math? Global Warming? Nah, wait, that's Earth's problem. Not ours.

[Cherri Bomb stares at Pentious with deadpan annoyance at how ignorant he is.]

Lute: Ummm...

[Cut back to the hotel. Vaggie tries to stab a bug. She tries to stab the bug, but misses, and starts stabbing the bug multiple times before Adam stops her.]

Vaggie: Staby! Staby! Stab! Stab!

Adam: Alright Vaggie, Vaggie. Vaggie! Your line is "We have the cleanest rooms in the hotel", okay?

Vaggie: Okay. Got it. I'm ready for it.

[Adam turns the camera to Vaggie.]

Adam: Aand. Action.

[Upon saying action, instead of saying the line, Vaggie freezes and stares blankly at the camera without a breath or blinking from the scene. Adam lowers the camera, looking puzzled. Katie also peers in. Close up on Vaggie making a blank stare with a ominous shrinking pupil. Katie slowly backs away, already creeped out.]

Adam: Uhh, cut.

Vaggie: [She snaps out of it and back to her cheerful self. And she giggles.] So how did i do?

Adsm: Well, Vaggie, you actually have to say the line, so let's roll again.

Vaggie: Okay.

Adam: Action.

[Vaggie freezes again, leaving Adam irritated, as Katie comes close to her face.]

Katie Killjoy: [Smugly whispers into Adam's ear.] You're doing this greatly, "Dick master".

Adam: (irritated) Cut! Alright, uhh… maybe we can try to… fix it in post.

Katie Killjoy: Do you even know what that means?

Adam: [Angrily.] I'll figure it out! Okay?!

[The next scene cuts to a dark room with Adam sitting in front of a broken TV, watching the poorly edited shots of the commercial. He groans with frustration before Vox enters the room.]

Vox: Seems like you're having a bit of a trouble there, hmm?

Adam: Ugh, this asshole... Why are you even here?

[Vox takes a seat on a couch next to him.]

Vox: For the entertainment. Of course. I came here because I love seeing wasteful souls struggle to accomplish something meaningful and then fail spectacularly, like how you are doing now. Good job!

[Adam, getting ticked off by Vox and his carefree insults, stands up and turns the camera toward him.]

Adam: [He points the camera to Vox.] And here is Vox, an egotstical piece of shit that-

[As Adam is panning the camera scene up to Vox's face, the video camera glitches violently from blue to black and Adam freaks out, dropping the sparking camera onto the floor.]

Adam: UGH!

Vox: I wouldn't try that, my dear. [He points to his face.] This face was made specifically for only my shows.

[Adam has had it with Vox's insults and walks up to him.]

Adam: That's it. I've had enough of you. I don't care about who or what you are. If you're staying here, you're going to make this work, because it won't be so [He imitates Vox's voice.] "entertaining" [back to his normal voice.] to watch over an empty hotel, will it now, shitass?

[As Adam returns to his chair, Vox watches him with narrowed eyes.]

Vox: [shrugging] Fair enough. [He approaches Adam] I'll tell you what. Let's make a deal.

Adam: Pfft, im not that stupid to make a deal with a demon like you.

Vox: Not for your soul. It's worthless to me. But rather. It will only be just a simple deal. I'll do this for you, and you never ask me to engage with this frivolous technology ever again. [Adam has second thoughts on letting Vox do the work for him.] Or…Lute can come back to absolutely nothing. And be so dissapointed. Your choice.

[Adam glances away for a brief moment before making his decision.]

Adam: [He sighs in defeat.] Fine. I guess.

[Adam picks up the camera and places it in Vox's hand, where blue energy skulls start swirling around it.]

Vox: Now then!

[Vox evaporates the camera with a clap of his hand, then snaps his fingers, conjuring equipment for a film set, summoning Katie, Tom, and Vaggie, and dressing up everyone in 50s clothings. Some shark demons are conjured up as additional film crew members.]

Adam: Alright everyone, let's make a motherfucking commercial.

[Cuts to Lute looking exasperated with another of Pentious's rants of women and her power.]

Sir Pentious: You know when you take her out for the fifth time and she still expects you to pay the check but you're like, (high pitched-voice) "Hey, I thought you wanted equality."

Lute: NO! Our shared problem of overpopulation in Hell!

Sir Pentious: Ohh. [He pauses, and then laughs.] Well, that's not a problem! We got that covered! [He turns to Cherri Bomb.] Ay, Cherri, how many demons did you kill this year?

Cherri Bomb: Got a good 215 this year, sir.

Sir Pentious: 215? Woah! Badass! Awesome job, sugar tits! Pound it. [He raises a fist for Cherri to make a fist-bump, which she does.]

Lute: Uh no, not awesome. Those are my people. You know that, right?

Sir Pentious: Oh yeah. That must suck...for you! [He bursts into laughter.] Oh. I don't give a fuck about demons. Haha.

Lute: But these are souls...Human souls just the same as the ones you have up in heaven.

Cherri Bomb: (coldly)  They are not the same. They had their chance and they blew it. Demons don't deserve an afterlife.

Lute: You're wrong. Sinners made mistakes, sure, but everyone makes mistakes. I made one too.

Cherri Bomb: Angels don't make mistakes. And as for you. You didn't make a mistake. You did the very thing that caused you to be down there. You never deserved to be an angel.

Lute: Do you really think that?

Cherri Bomb: No, i don't think that. I know that.

Sir Pentious: Yeah, I've never made a mistake in my fuckin' life.

[As Cherri comes around the table, the scene turns slightly darker with ominous red.]

Cherri Bomb: The only reason you're still here is because your step-mommy gave you and those pathetic hellborn kind a pardon from an exorcist blade. How does it feel to know how little ya' matter?

Sir Pentious: Oops, almost out of time. Guess we should get into it.

Lute: Oh right, fuck! [She rushes to present her plan as fast as she can, summoning a stack of papers to the table.] Okay, I've got a lot to get through and not a lot of time, and I feel like you weren't hearing me before, so here it goes. [She clears her throat as she starts singing quickly, pulling drawings from the stack to show them what she means.] ♫ I know Hell's population is out of control. It's a bad situation. It's taking a toll. If we rehab these Sinners. And cleanse all their souls. At my Hazbin Hotel-♫ [Lute puts down the drawings she's holding and reaches for another.] Wait, I'm getting ahead of myself! ♫Right! Extermination! I know you guys fly down. Just to kill once a year. And it must be annoying. To schlep all the way here. If they join you in Heaven. That trip can disappear! You can wave that chore farewell. [She takes a deep breath.] It'll be a happy day in-♫

Sir Pentious: ♫Now let me stop you right there.♫

Lute: Oh-

Sir Pentious: ♫To save us all precious time. ♫

Lute: Okay...

Sir Pentious: ♫If what you're suggesting. Is letting them climb. Up the ladder. Oh, they'd rather cross the Pearly Gates?♫

Lute: Well, i uh-

Sir Pentious: ♫Sorry, sweetie. But there's no defyin' their fates! Cussss Hell is forever! Whether you like it or not. Had their chance to behave better. Now they boil in the pot. 'Cause the rules are black and white. There's no use in tryin' to fight it. They're burnin' for their lives. Until we kill 'em again!♫

Lute: Okay, but-

Sir Pentious: Just chillax, babe. ♫cus You're wasting your breath.♫

Lute: Hehe...

Sir Pentious: ♫Did i really hear you imply. That the scum don't deserve death? Are they Winners? ♫Are they Sinners? 'Cause it's cut and dry.♫

Lute: Well, actually, if you take a look-

Sir Pentious: ♫Fair is fair, an eye for an eye! And when all's said and done (Said and done) There's the question of fun (Fun) And for those of us with Divine Ordainment. Extermination is entertainment! Bow-now-now-nownow! Guitar solo, fuck yeah! [He sings a guitar solo.]♫

[Lute gets up after being knocked down by Pentious]

Lute: Ugh...

Sir Pentious: ♫Hell is forever. Whether you like it or not. Had their chance to behave better.♫

[Four golden mirages of Exorcists appear, surrounding Lute from all sides.]

(Lute: Where the hell did you people come from?!)

Sir Pentious: Now they boil in the pot. 'Cause the rules are black and white. There's no use in tryin' to fight it. They're burnin' for their lives. Until we kill 'em again! Fuckin' Hell is forever. And it's meant to suck a lot. So give up your dumb endeavor. 'Cause you don't have a shot!♫

[Lute gets so angry that her 3rd eye opens up, making a growling noise as she burns the paper she's holding]

Sir Pentious: ♫Just as long as I've got your attention. I guess I should probably mention. That we've made the determination. To move up the next Extermination!♫ [He brandishes a scroll reading "FUCK YOU I DO WHAT I WANT!!"]

Lute: What?!

Sir Pentious: ♫Now i imagine. You are really confused. But let me tell you somethin'. I don't give a fuck about waiting a whole year. So see you in Six months!♫ [Despite being a hologram, he grabs Lute and throws her right out of the door. Cherri throws her papers after her.]

Lute: Um, wait, b-but you-you-

[As Lute tries to get to Pentious, the door slowly closes while he continues to do a guitar solo shredding. It fully closes before Lute can reach him.]

Lute: [tearing up] Ugh, SHIT!

[Defeated, Lute slams a fist on the door before the scene cuts to black.]

[Later. Lute sadly returns to the hotel. Adam runs to her and hugs her.]

Adam: Lutey! How did it go, did they listen?

Lute: Oh...yeah...they sure did… hear it. But, um-

Adam: Oh, come here! We have something exciting to show you. [Adam leads Lute to the group] Vox pulled some strings and it's about to air.

Vox: I pulled a few limbs too, hahaha!

Lute: Wait, the commercial? You all made a new one?

Katie Killjoy: Yeah, one of my better performances if I do say so myself.

Lute: [While she's beaming and tearing up.] That's... that's so amazing of you guys. I don't know what i did to deserve you guys.

Katie Killjoy: Sshh, it's starting.

Adam: (On TV): Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel-

[TV cuts to a breaking news report]

[Adam, Lute and Katie get annoyed and angrily complain. Vaggie claps and giggles while Vox just looks at them with his smile, and Tom just looks at all of them with a bored look.]

Zestial: Breaking news in Hell today! We have just received word from the Heaven Embassy that the next Extermination is happening sooner than ever before. Do you know what that means, Zeezi?

Zeezi: No, what does that mean, Zestial?

Zestial: Well, it simply means. we're all royally fucked! [His eyes twitch.]

[Screaming can be heard from Sinners as the time on the Clock Tower reduces to 176 days until the next Extermination.]

Katie Killjoy: Wait, what? Why?!

Tom Trench: Yeah. Why?

[A drone scours an area until it finds a dead Exorcist corpse with its head missing. The drone scans the corpse.]

Cherri Bomb: We found the body, sir. They've never ever managed to kill one of us before. We should just go down there now and kill all of them now!

Sir Pentious: No, no, sweetheart. We can't risk them finding out. But don't worry. When we come back, there won't be a demon left alive to pull a stunt like this again!

[Pentious slams a fist on the projector, destroying it and causing its light to disappear, leaving only his glowing evil smile.]

Chapter Text

[Chapter opens with Zestial Morde and Missi Zilla in a dimly lit conference room, plotting their report.]

Zestial: (grinning mischievously) Alright, Zeezi! Are you ready to expose this hotel for the cesspool it really is? I can already envision the headline: “Hell Hotel Horrors!”

Zeezi: [snickering] Oh. Ab-so-lute-ly! We’ll make sure their dirty laundry is aired out for everyone to see. What’s the plan, Zestial?

Zestial: We need an expert to back up our claims. I was thinking a health inspector could sniff out all the filth in that shitstain of a hotel.

Zeezi: [She claps excitedly.] Great idea! Let’s call in that inspector from the other side of the ring. They’re notorious for their harsh reviews!

Zestial: I knew there was a brain inside of your head Zilla!

Zeezi: Way to ruin the moment.

Zestial: I don't give a shit.

[Shift to the hotel lobby where the group is gathered, including Adam, Katie, Lute, Vaggie, Vox, and Tom.]

Adam: [adjusting his collar.] So, what’s the big deal? Why are we suddenly having a health inspector coming into the hotel today?

Katie Killjoy: [Smirking while looking at her phone.] Word has it that that Morde guy and the dinosaur woman are behind this whole setup. They want to tear this place apart!

Lute: [Extremely concerned.] Should we be worried? I mean, they can’t just come in here and ruin our reputation, can they? And why are you so nonchalant about this?!

Katie Killjoy: Meh. I couldn't care less.

Adam: You DO realize that if this place shuts down. You won't have free room anymore.

Katie Killjoy: [She gasps and jumps up, panicking.] WE NEED TO DO SOMETHING!

Lute: I KNOW!

Katie Killjoy; We can’t let them close this place! We need to show them that this hotel is up to standard, no matter what they say.

Lute: Yeah!

Vox: (grinning) This could get interesting. Time for a little friendly competition! I’ll record everything. Vaggie. Bring me my camera.

Vaggie: Right away! [She skips away.]

[Later, the Inspector arrives to the hotel, and walks into the hotel with a clipboard. As Zestial and Zeezi hold up their camera's.]

Health Inspector: [clearing her throat.] I’m here to conduct a surprise inspection. Let’s see what this hotel really has to offer.

Zestial: (smirking) Good luck! I hope you find plenty to criticize!

[The inspector steps inside the hotel.]

Adam: [tensing up.] Wait, hold on a second. If you’re here to judge, you better be prepared for the consequences of your findings!

[As the inspection goes on, tension builds. The health inspector starts calling out issues she finds in various areas of the hotel.]

Health Inspector: (pointing) This bathroom is unacceptable; I can see grime from here! And the food in the kitchen? Disgusting!

[Upon hearing this, Vaggie turns mad, and prepares to grab a knife, but Tom takes the knife away from her.]

Tom Trench: She' not worth it.

[Adam steps forward assertively.]

Adam: (anger rising) Excuse me, but we've...mostly me and Lute, worked so very hard to improve this place! You have no right to come in here and critize everything without context!

Health Inspector: [smirking.] I have every right to report what I see. You think you can handle the truth?

[Adam gets increasingly frustrated, grips the edge of a nearby table as if he's about to snap.]

Lute: Adam, calm down. She’s trying to provoke you, and it’s working! She's just trying to anger you. She's not worth it!

Zestial: [whispering to Zeezi.] Look at him! This is more entertaining than I thought. Oh how this will get the BEST ratings once this shithole closes!

[As the health inspector continues her inspection, Adam is visibly on edge, struggling to keep his temper in check.]

Health Inspector: (mockingly) So, what’s it going to be, first man? Are you going to stab me, or just continue to live in your delusions about this hotel?

[Adam’s hand inches closer to a knife on the table, tension in the air as the others watch, shocked.]

Adam: Oho. You. Judgin' ME?! Inspectors are the third most hated beings in ALL of creations!

Lute: Why don't we just...start from scratch? Hm? Good idea? Right?..Anyone?..No?..oh gosh...

[The group gathers, tension still palpable. Zestial and Zeezi exchange smug looks while the others strategize.]

Vox: (smirking) How about we turn the tables? Let’s give her an experience to remember!

Adam: Cannot believe im about to say this, but. Agreed. Let’s show the inspector how great this place can be. [He takes his Harpoon out.]

Lute: Oor. Maybe...If they get an amazing service experience, maybe her report won't be as bad!

Tom Trench: I already did something.

Adam, Vox, Lute, Katie & Vaggie: You did what?

Tom Trench: Yeah. I bribed that chick with some alcohol and cash. By the way, i owe you 25 dollars now Adam. Here' your wallet back.

[Tom tosses Adam his wallet back, as he catches it with an angry expression.]

Health Inspector: [While drinking from a bottle. And pocketing the cash.] Looks like this place is perfect as it is.

Zestial: (looking annoyed) But we promised our viewers chaos! Ugh! Great! Now we'll have to cancel everything! [Chapter end.]

Chapter Text

[Chapter opens inside of the hotel lobby. The camera pans across the chaos as Lute is at the front desk, talking to Adam.]

Lute: Why isn't anyone coming to the hotel? You guys made a new commercial, and yet there's noone here...hm...[She puts her face into her hands.]

Adam: Oh... Lutey, don't be sad, Im sure someone will come here...eventually...

[Suddenly, the doors to the Hotel opens as Katie looks up from her phone.]

Katie Killjoy: Well atleast noone exploded the wall this time.

Papermint: (cheerfully) Greetings, fellow citizens of hell, and people with existential crisises...Oh...And residents of his hotel!

Lute: Oh my goodness! Hii! [She runs over to Papermint and shakes his hands excitedly.] Im Lute. What's your name?

Papermint: My name's Papermint, the genius! I came here after seeing your ad on the TVs!

Lute: [She excitedly looks back to Adam]
Adam, can you believe it? Our commercial actually worked! We have a new real guest!

Katie Killjoy: Uh. And what am i supposed to be, if not a real guest?!

Lute: Well uhm...You're important to us...but you...

Adam: Always make us look bad. Harass Tom all the time. Make sexual jokes all the time. Never tried to change for the better. And-

Lute: What Adam means is that...He's actually someone who's interested in redemption. Right?

Papermint: Of course i am!

[Katie looks down, a little sad. But she quickly regains her composure.]

Adam: [He skeptically looks at Papermint.] I hope this new guest isn’t another person like Katie.

[Tom then walks into the room with a bottle of alcohol in his hand. And notices Papermint, and looks confused.]

Tom Trench: Who the fuck is this? Why is a shark here? Are you one of Vox's servants?

Katie Killjoy: Oh, heya Trenchcoat~ Look at this new guy! I bet he's here for the comedy~

Tom Trench: I told you already. Do. Not. Call. Me. Trenchcoat!

Katie Killjoy: Oh please, i know you love it~ [She leans close towards Tom, but he pushes her away.]

[Vox then appears from a camera on the corner of the wall.]

Papermint: [He sees Vox.] Hoooly shiit! Vox?! Oh my goodness!

Vox: Papermint! Sweetcheek! Im so happy to see you again! How you been? It's been ages! You doing good? [Vox and Papermint hug each other happily.]

Papermint: Oh you know it. Im doing amazing. I saw the ad to this tacky rad little hotel. And i thought i'd see what it's like here. And came to visit for old times sake.

Vox: Of course. Everyone is welcome to come here!

[Then Vaggie walks in, dusting off the hotel’s cleaning supplies.]

Vaggie: Good morning guys! Hi Papermint! Wait...[She happily gasps.] Papermint! [She hugs his leg then let's go.] How you been? Are you still a baddie?! Vox, is he still the baddie we knew from back then?

Papermint: Oh yes i am! And i see Vaggie still hasn't changed one bit! Girlie, how are you doing?

Vaggie: Amazing! Im killing the bugs here! They are winning...But only for now!~

[Vaggie runs off to chase a cockroach. Papermint laughs akwardly. Then Vox speaks up again.]

Vox: It's always good to catch up with old friends, right? [He laughs heartily.]

Lute: Oh. Do you guys know each other?

Papermint: Oh, we go wwaayy back. We actually knew each other back when we were still alive. Until Vox's head was crushed by a tv. Haha.

[Hearing this, Vox's smile falters as he stares at Papermint, who's unaware that he's a angrily looking at him.]

Lute: Aww. It's always nice to meet Vox's, or anyone's old friends. You can stay here if you want to!

Adam: [As he's frowning.] As long as Vox keeps his friend in check...

[Lute nods as Adam talks, beaming with optimism.]

Lute: Absolutely!

[Papermint chuckles at Adam's distrust, while Vox rolls his eyes.]

Vox: Don't worry, Adam. My old friend here is as harmless as a little small puppy. Right, Papermint?

Papermint: Oh, absolutely. I'd never cause any trouble here.

[Adam gives Papermint a suspicious glare, not believing his words for a second, while Lute pats Papermint's shoulder.]

Lute: Oh, don't mind Adam. He's just a little protective of this hotel, and mostly me...[She looks at Adam for a second, seeing his distrust in Papermint.] Buuut I'm sure we'll all get along great! You can stay here, but only if you don't put us in danger. How does that sound?

Papermint: Fair enough. I guess it's only fair like that.

Lute: See Adam? Im sure this will be alright! I can feel it!

Katie Killjoy: This is Stupid...

[Katie walks to the Hotel doors.]

Adam: Where the fuck are you going?!

Katie Killjoy: Outside. For a smoke. Uh...You guys said we can't smoke in here.

Lute: Oh. She's already respecting our no smoking inside rule! That's so great!

[Katie walks out angrily, Tom looks at her suspiciously. And decides to follow her.]

[Back inside the hotel, Lute stands infront of the gang in the lounge.]

Lute: [enthusiastically.] So, I thought introduce our new guest to the Hotel!

[Meanwhile, out in town, Katie enters inside of a bar. Tom follows behind. Katie sits at the bar with a gang of shark demons. As Tom enters the bar someone bumps into him which makes him growl and glare in their direction briefly until he hears Katie and the gang of sharks laughing.]

Katie Killjoy: [Laughing.] I'm so gonna get fucked up tonight.

[Tom sits at the bar counter, placing money down, and orders a drink.]

Tom Trench: Give me a whiskey... [The bartender places a glass down and pours some before Tom grabs the bottle.] I meant the whole bottle. [The bartender stares at him silently before letting him have the bottle and takes away the glass instead as Tom drinks down the bottle.]

Katie Killjoy: Haha, ya, ya, so I said "You couldn't afford me in a million afterlives." I got better options. [The gangsters laugh as Tom watches and snarls. Abd she speaks to one demon.] Hey, baby, be a prince charming, and bring me another one? Mommy is out of juice!

[The demon takes his and Katie's empty glasses by the bar counter as he sits down on a stool next to Tom who glares at him in suspicion as the bartender pours the liquor in the two glasses. The shark demons reaches into his suit and takes out some love potion/drug and pours it into Katie's drink making the color pink. Tom eyes widen as he watches and the demon gets up from the stool to return to Katie. Tom huffs and sets his bottle of whiskey aside.]

Tom Trench: [Muttering] Son of a-

Demon: Here you go, darling. Just for you-

[Just as Katie is about to reach for the drink, Tom appears from behind the demon and grabs him by the back of his suit, lifting him off of the ground as the drinks spill.]

Demon: Woah!

Tom Trench: Nice try, asshole.

[Katie watches Tom throw the demon across the room, causing him to scream and land headfirst into a jukebox as up temp music plays and another demon dodges. The rest of the gangsters take out their guns.]

Tom Trench: Let's go. [He grabs Katie's arm and pulls her behind him.]

Katie Killjoy: What the? Hey! H-h-hey, hey!

[Tom drags Katie out of the bar.]

Katie Killjoy: Tom! What the actual fuck are you doing here? Let go of me.

Tom Trench: No. Because im taking you back to the hotel. That fucker put something in your drink. And i ain't letting you drink any of that stuff.

Katie Killjoy: Do you really think I can't tell if someone pits something in my drink? I do this all the time!

Tom Trench: So what you're saying is, you just let people drug you all the time?

Katie Killjoy: You think I ask for it? I don't ask for any of this shit! I didn't ask to be this way. I didn't ask for Lute to save me, I didn't ask for you to come here. I can handle myself.

Tom Trench: Really? Because I just saw someone self-destructing. It seems like... I don't know... you might need a bartender to talk to.

Katie Killjoy: [Chuckles, incredulous.] Oh wooowww, so now you're going to act like you give a shit about me? You think after how you treated me, I'm gonna open up to you? Bitch please. [She walks off.]

Tom Trench: Maybe I'd treat you better if you were just real, and not some bullshit version of yourself, always pushing my boundaries! Always faking yourself. And now suddenly, a new person comes to the hotel, you're not in the spotlight, and you leave? What is the logic in that?! Tell me. Where's the logic?

[Katie stops walking, eyes widening before tears form in the corner of her eyes.]

Katie Killjoy: BECAUSE I HATE MYSELF! OKAY?! It's just...I feel like that if im not in the spotlight. People will forget me...And noone will care about me anymore. Or comfort me when im down...And this... [Gestures to the redlight street.] is my escape....Where I can forget about it all! Forget about how much i hate how i act. How much I hate how i look. And how much I hate... everything. A place where I can get high, and not have to think about how much it hurts. [Tom stands there listening and blinking as he frowns at what she says. Holding his hands as his eyebrows furrowed.]...and...i just...I just want to...to feel actually...loved... [She sits down on the sidewalk, curling up into a small ball with her legs close to her chest with his arms wrapped around them and her head buried into her knees.]

[Tom stares at Katie with sympathy and pity, then walks over and sits down the pavement near him.]

Tom Trench: [Sighs.] I know what it's like...I used to be real famous down here. [Katie looks to Tom, who sighs, giving an assuring smile.] Yeah, and uh... It was nice to have that while it lasted. But when you get into a huge controversy regarding overlords. The stakes are REALLY high. And losing a few hands can be more than a little dangerous. So when you're down on your luck, you turn to anything to stay famous... Even making deals for your own soul. So I know what it's like to... hate yourself... And knowing that you can't change it...

[Katie and Tom sits in silence for a moment.]

Tom Trench: 🎵So things look bad, and your back's against the wall. Your whole existence seems fucking hopeless. You're feelin' filthy as a dive bar bathroom stall. Cannot face the world sober and dopeless. You've lost your way, you think your life is wrecked. Well, let me just say you're correct🎵

Katie Killjoy: Wait, what?

Tom Trench: 🎵You're. Just. a. loser, baby. A loser, goddamn baby. You're just a. fucked up little whiny bitch.🎵

Katie Killjoy: What?! Hey!

Tom Trench: 🎵You're a loser, just like me.🎵

Katie Killjoy: Thanks so much, you jackass.

Tom Trench: 🎵You have some screws that are loose, you boozer. You're an only one-star reviews-er. You're a power-bottom at rock bottom. But you got company.🎵

Katie Killjoy: Do you think this really makes me feel better?

Tom Trench: 🎵There was a time I thought no one could relate. To the gruesome ways in which I'm damaged. But letting those walls down, it can sometimes set you straight!. We're all livin' in the same shit-sandwich🎵

Katie Killjoy: 🎵I sold my soul to that crazy cannibal.🎵

Tom Trench: Haha! 🎵And do you really think that makes you unique?.🎵 Get outta here, girl! You're not special. Not even close. 🎵We're both just losers, baby. We're losers, it's okay to be-🎵

Katie Killjoy: 🎵A coked up, drug addict?🎵

Tom Trench: 🎵Baby, that's fine by me.🎵

Katie Killjoy: 🎵I'm a loser, honey, A schmoozer and a dummy! But at least, now i know I'm not alone🎵

Tom Trench: 🎵You're a loser🎵

Both: 🎵Just like me!🎵

Tom Trench: 🎵I got an appetite for gamblin.🎵

Katie Killjoy: 🎵I got an appetite for samplin' every drug that i can find!🎵

Tom Trench: Go ahead baby, sing that song, come on!

Katie Killjoy: 🎵I got no holes left to deflower.🎵

Tom Trench: 🎵I sold my soul to save my fame. And now I'm on that demon's leash.🎵

Both: 🎵I'm trapped and it gets worse with every hour.🎵

Katie Killjoy: 🎵You're just a loser, baby.🎵

Tom Trench: 🎵A loser, but just maybe if we-🎵

Both: 🎵Eat shit together, things will end up differently!🎵

[Katie begins humming while Tom sings.]

Tom Trench: 🎵It's time to lose your self-loathin'. Excuse yourself, let hope in, baby. Play your card, be who you are🎵

Both: 🎵A loser, just like me.🎵

[Tom offers his hand for Katie as she takes it.]

Tom Trench: Come on. [He stands up.] Let's go back to the Hotel. [He helps her stand up.]

Katie Killjoy: Fine. Let's go.

Tom Trench: You know. You're good at singing.

Katie Killjoy: Sex ain't the ONLY thing im good at you know.

Tom Trench: I really like the real you.

[Later, Tom and Katie return to hotel laughing together.]

Katie Killjoy: That woman has no pupils. Im suprised she can see. She had a fingertip and a leg in her hands and yet she couldn't even find them. And it took her 30 minutes to find out that they were in her hands. Her eyes are so shitty! And she's even a dumbass!

Tom Trench: Hehe, and this is the woman you gotta take orders from?

Katie Killjoy: I know! She's just a fucking joke, right?

Tom Trench: Definitely.

[The two enter the Hotel.]

Lute: Oh. You two came back. But Katie. Why did you walk out so angrily earlier?

Katie Killjoy: It's all fine. Me and Tom just went to a club. We got bored outside. Sorry for not telling you we went out.

Lute: Aww. What a beautiful friendship. Adam. Look at them! Already friends!

Adam: I doubt they're JUST friends. But let's go to sleep now.

Lute: And she even apologized!

[Adam picks Lute up and carries her to their room.]

Tom Trench: Hey, while those two are fuckin', how about we get you thar drink you wanted so badly earlier?

Katie Killjo: You read my mind.

[They head to get the drink.]

[Chapter ends here.]

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins inside of the Hazbin Hotel.]

Lute: Okay, now that we have a new guest, i think that we might have some other new guests coming here too! Maybe...in no time!

Katie Killjoy: Oh, please, you had less then half a chance when you started all this redemption bullshit. And now... [Her phone vibrates with violent threating messages such as "fucking bitch"]

Papermint: What i think Katie means is that...You might not have another new guest coming here...

Lute: Surely...There will be! We just...have to look a little harder for it!

Papermint: Yeah...Well, while you're looking for it, the rest of hell is going nuts.

Katie Killjoy: Yup. Just check it out. [She waves her phone.] People are already freaking out about the news. Look at what's happening in the Doomsday District. Even after all these days, suddenly people panic about the exterminations right now? [She scrolls down an article with the bottom showing a demon screaming in front of a fire. Suddenly a pink message appears. Lute gets closer to read it.]

Lute: Err, what is a... "donkey show"?

[Katie panics and retreats the phone back.]

Katie Killjoy: Aah, oh...heh, nothing. It's just my boss, Rosie. She is freaked out and panicking about the news too. Like I said, everyone's losing their shit right now.

Adam: Yeah, that's true. Sinners are desperate. Maybe desperate enough to try anything to escape the exterminations?

Lute: [She gasps at the idea.] This is the perfect time to recruit more sinners for the hotel!

Papermint: Yeah. That's a cute idea and all, but you really gonna go out in all of this? [She waves the phone with the place still on fire and demons in panic.]

Adam: Well, it's not like people are just gonna show up on our doorstep and suddenly wanna change, or just want a place to stay. And-

[Suddenly, there is a massive explosion made Lute scream in fright from behind, getting their attention. They turn to see a freshly made hole in the wall, then cuts to outside to see Husk armed for battle. The scene cuts inside to see him and his kitten Boiz scattering around.]

Husk: Show yourself Vox! Come and face-

[Husk pauses for a moment when he notices Vox absent from the freshly made hole. He then looks to see him sipping coffee on the balcony of the second floor.]

Husk: Oh, there you are. Face my wrath!

Vox: Who are you again?

Husk: Who am I? Who am I?! I am the great Husker!

[Vox dissolves into electricity, as he descends to the ground, materializing aside Katie, Adam, and Lute, who are in the scene watching Husk's zeppelin.]

Husk: Inventor, architect of dessstruction, villain extraordinaire!

Kitten Bois: Ooh! You tell 'em, boss!

[Vaggie appears on Vox's right shoulder, clearly starstruck.]

Vaggie: Ooooooh, he's a baddie~

[Vox scoops Vaggie up and drops her to the ground.]

Vox: Ha, well if all that's true, you'd think I'd have heard of you already.

Husk: I literally attacked you last week. [Vox cocks his head.] We've done battle, like... 20 times? Now is the 21st.

Vox: Well, you must have been really bad at this. I don't remember you.

Husk: Silence! Now cower! For when I've slain you, the almighty Old Entertainers will finally acknowledge me as their equal.

[Vaggie reappears on Vox's shoulder again.]

Vaggie: Ooh!~ Wait, who are the old times whatever things?

Vox: Oh, nobody important. Don't worry your pretty head about them.

[Cut to The Old Entertainers' headquarters. A large crowd is in front of a store as they watch an advertisement on the tvs facing the window showing off a spy drone.]

Ad: New RadioTek designer voyeur scopes. Peeping on the neighbors has never been more stylish. RadioTek! Trust us with your money!

[Crowd immediately enters the store and stampedes out with boxes with voyeur scopes. then cuts to random people watching their computers laptops and phones, and reveals their eyes signifying the work of hypnosis.]

Ad: This week's episode of "Yeah, I Fucked Your Sister, So What?" is brought to you by Radiotek! Trust us with your entertainment!

[Shifts to tapping fingers as we enter a large room with tvs showing off numerous consumers as "trust us" repeats and overlaps. electricity courses as Alastor stands up from his chair laughing maniacally from his viewer's consumerism.]

Alastor: Muhahaha! Now that's good entertainment!

[Suddenly, Alastor's radio mic staff rings, specifically, an old 20s song. Alastor courses the call and transfers it to one of his many screens to reveal Mimzy, in her studio, Alastor then sits down on his chair.]

Alastor: Well hello there, Mimzy! How are you this hellish morning?

Mimzy: Oh, cut the shit, Alastor. I need you up here now!

[Alastor looks to one of his screens as he gets his coffee cup and drinks from it.]

Alastor: Whatever could be the problem, my dear?

Mimzy: Your little cannibal girly-girl is wrecking my emporium, while I'm trying to pull together a show and- [Several workers are running around and screaming, and objects being tossed, as Rosie is cussing.]

Rosie: THAT FUCKING, UNGRATEFUL, TWIG BITCH!

Mimzy: Just get down here, NOW! ...Damn it, Rosie!

[The call ends, and Alastor's smile falters away as he gets up sighing, fixing up his bowtie.]

Alastor: 'Oh god. Here I go, dealing with Rosie.' Just another fucking day with the cannibal best friend. Hey-hey-hey. What do you know? Fuck my fucking life.

[Alastor then walks up to a platform, which rises up.]

[Cut to an elevator with a smiling Alastor with the world bubble saying "trust us!", before opening to reveal a frowning Alastor in the same position, sighing, and then putting on a smile for a crowd of reporters that overlap one another before pointing their microphones to him.]

Reporter: Mr. Alastor! What are your thoughts about the new extermination deadline?

Alastor: My dear people! We at Radiotek Enterprises have always been at the forefront of innovation. And now, with this new oncoming threat, we are shifting our focus, to your protection. We are pleased to announce-

[The screen zooms to him and an ad featuring the Radiotek logo, now gold and with angelic wings, with the tagline reading-]

Alastor: Radiotek, Angelic Security is coming soon! Trust us, with YOUR safety.

[Alastor uses his eyes to hypnotize the crowd the same way as his consumers.]

Niffty: Uhm...Alastor...sir when did we begin working on Angelic Security?

Alastor: Thirty seconds ago. [He walks off] Try to get that bitch Sera on the books and cancel all my appointments for today. I have a fire to put out upstairs. [He then morphs his body into a shadow and dissapears.]

[Cutting to Mimzy's studio. The staff cleans everything up as she looks to four designers holding up dresses to show her]

Mimzy: Ugh. No. Unacceptable. You're fired. What is this? Shoulder pads?! IN MY STUDIO?! Is this a 1980s rock band?! BURN IT like the bitches who wore it!

[As Mimzy sends the designer away, Alastor appears next to her]

Alastor: Oh Mimzy! I can see you're really busy. Tell me, where's our hot-headed friend now?

Mimzy: Up in her room, waiting for a deer eared boy toy to calm her down!

Alastor: (sighs) And uh, what's got her so out of sorts today?

Mimzy: Who the fuck knows? But she tore up my best model! And you know, the show can't wait for that unlucky bitch to pull herself back together! Now i have to use my second favorite. Franklin! Get your flat ass here! NOW! [Franklin nervously runs onto the platform, and Mimzy uses her powers to change her outfit by swiping her hand, one after another until she spots the one she wants.] No. No. Hideous. I want to die. Eww. (gasp) Yes! That's the one.

Alastor: Ahh, looks like you have everything under control here.

Mimzy: But of course, I do! Fuck you still bitch! [She flips him off] Now shoo! Take care of the mad bitch.

[Alastor goes upstairs and is greeted by two demons who open the door for him. Once he enters, he finds Rosie sitting on her couch surrounded by a fog of pink smoke. When Rosie notices Alastor, she sits up with fury in her eyes.]

Rosie: Fucking FINALLY! [throws drink] Susan! Another drink! [Susan, who was standing next to her nods as it quickly heads off and re-appears with the drink.] Ugh! Can you believe what that piece of shit did? THE UNGRATEFUL BITCHASS!!! [As she speaks, she tosses the drink at Alastor, who moves away making the drink, hits the door, and shatters on the floor.]

Alastor: Uh, which one of your workers are we talking about here?

Rosie: [She gets up.] That fucker Katie Killjoy! [She walks up to him.] Who the hell else would I be talking about?! [She walks past him.] That fucking SLUT walked out on me! [She turns to Alastor] ME! I fucking made her who she is today! [Alastor walks a little way away.] Without me, she's just a slim wasted twig bitch. With a mid body type.

Alastor: Oh! Did. Katie finally quit?

Rosie: NO! She didn't fucking quit! It's worse! She MOVED AWAY!!! She thinks she can just walk in here, work, and then go home somewhere else? Can you FUCKING believe that?! [She walks to closet.] She thinks she can run off and shack up with that bimbo exorcist.

Alastor: Katie is... living with the instrument named girl now?

Rosie: YEAH! That BITCH flute, or Cello, or i dunno- Something like that, she's got this hotel and- [As she speaks, he opens the closet full of guns, drugs, and pictures including a poster of herself. Rosie brings up two long pistol guns: a long revolver and a semi-pistol. And speaks in a more relaxed tone.] Which of these makes me look sexier? [She turns back to the closet.]

Alastor: Heh. What are you doing, Rosie? You're not going over there. [As he speaks, his eyes changes to show his simmering anger, but Rosie is busy loading her guns.]

Rosie: That slippery twig is gonna remember who owns her. And i'm gonna FUCK everyone in that rancid shit hole, I swear to god!

[Before she finishes, Alastor grabs her by the collar and shoves her to his face, clearly furious.]

Alastor: [in a distorted voice.] ROSIE! [He calms down.] Hehe. Think about it. [He then walks Rosie towards the window, taking away one of her guns and putting it in his pocket.] Our brand is perfection. And what do you think chasing your performers around town will do for our image?

Rosie: Um.....fuck it up?

Alastor: Right! Do you want people thinking you can't control your employees?

Rosie: No.

Alastor: Exactly! And hey, you still have her under contract. You own her soul. She isn't going anywhere! Sooo...you should...

Rosie: Do nothing?

Alastor: Oh. What a great idea. Now that's why they pay you the [He pinches her cheek.] big bucks.

Rosie: Ugh, but I really wanted to shoot someone! And then eat them. [As she speaks, she gets a cigarette holder, and Alastor lights it.]

Alastor: I'll tell you what. I'll call up the lowest earners this month. [He walks to TVs.]

Rosie: Ohh, you know me too well, Al. [She chuckles and blows smoke.] Ya know.... Katie isn't the only one spending time at this ratty hotel with the princessa.

Alastor: Oh, who else is there? Someone who owes you money?

Rosie: [She chuckles.] Someone who owes us much more than money... The Tv Demon is there too.

[Upon hearing those words, Alastor scratches the desk so hard it leaves scratch marks. Alastor made small ominous chuckles before turning back to Rosie, two red lines appear on the left side of his lower lip.]

Alastor: (distorted) What did you just say?

Rosie: You heard me.

Alastor: Vox. [He walks to her] came back...and she is with Lilith's girltoy, and that wasn't the [He grabs her by the collar.] FIRST FUCKING THING YOU TOLD ME?!?!?!

Rosie: [She frees herself from Alastor.] Hey! killing Vox is your kink. Not mine. [As she speaks, she walks to the desk and turns on the television.]

[Alastor teleports to the center screen, which is a recording from a RadioTech Voyeur scope high in the sky. The scene, from a drone point of view, showing Vox using his powers to attack Husk's zeppelin, laughing maniacally as he hears Husk screaming.]

Husk: Arrgh! Oh! Please! Stop!

Lute: Um...Vox? I think he's had enough.

Katie Killjoy: Nah. He's got a few more hits in him.

Papermint: Yup. Definitely. This is quite enjoyable seeing.

[Husk falls from the zeppelin in front of Vox, face first on the ground. Vox twirls his staff.]

Vox: Thank you very much for another forgettable experience.

Husk: Thank you... for letting your guard down! [He quickly grabs a bit of Vox's suit.] Aha! Yah! Oh, shit...

[Husk looks up to see Vox's shadow transform in front of him and Vox apparently makes a screeching sound. The next shot shows a massive green explosion as Husk is flying off to the city screaming as he disappears from sight.]

Vox: Well, it looks as though I need a visit to the tailor! Best of luck, starlights.

Adam: Wait, you're leaving?! Vox! We need your help! We need you to do your job.

Papermint: [He gestures to the hole on the wall.] And also. We need a new wall.

Vox: Of course! I cannot simply just let my new little project fall into disrepair already. What would the papers say?!

[With a snap of his fingers, black ink demons appear with construction tools as Vox walks away. Katie takes an interest and looks at one of the larger muscular demons, and shoves Adam away as she walks up to him.]

Katie Killjoy: [Giggles.] Hey, sweet cheeks. Whatcha doin' later? I love me a man with a giant ...tool.

[The screen zooms out to reveal Rosie scowling at the current events, leaning his face against the screen.]

Rosie: See?! Look at how she is flirting with that guy, and he's not even paying her! Who is that? I'm gonna fucking kill his whole fucking family! Alastor? [She slams her fist on the table.] ALASTOR!

[Alastor was paying little attention, as his pupils turn into radiowaves, as he eyes Vox leaving, his appearance static and out of focus as the screen becomes a bit static.]

Alastor: [glitches] That MOTHERFUCKER is back!

[Rosie grins as she realizes the situation and walks to him.]

Rosie: Yeah, I thought he was gone for good too.

Alastor: It's been seven years!

[Rosie leans up to him and pinches his cheek, Alastor clearly pissed to care.]

Rosie: You're still pissed that he almost beat you that time?

Alastor: Uh, FUCK YOU.

Rosie: Im just saying. [She walks around him.]

Alastor: Things have changed a lot since he left town!

Rosie: That's for sure.

Alastor: I gotta send a message of who's REALLY in charge of things now!

[Alastor's face fills the screen as Rosie laughs in the background. The next shot shows Alastor grinning as he marches to his chair.]

Alastor: ♫Welcome back! I'm gonna make you wish that you stayed gone!♫ [As he sings, electricity courses through his arm as he sits on his chair, and turns to face the numerous screens.]♫Say goodbye to a your old status quo. Cus Everyone knows that there's a brand-new dawn, turn the radios on!♫

Director: Camera, speeds, rolling in three, two...

Chorus: ♫ Wel-come to the show! ♫

Alastor: ♫Top of the hour and we're discussing a certain has-been who has been spotted cavorting around town after a seven-year absence, Did anybody miss him, did anybody notice? More on tonight's program. ♫♫ So, the Television Demon is back in town! Why is he still around?. What does that mean for your family?. Well, handily, I've got good news for you all! He's a loser, a fossil, and I don't mean to sound hostile,♫

Alastor & Chorus: ♫ But the demon is a coward! ♫

Alastor: ♫ You can take that as gospel. Pulling my viewers? Impossible! Plain boring! Im entertaining. Stop giving him the time of day! Don't listen to a word he'd say. I hope he had a nice vacay!.♫

Alastor & Chorus: ♫But he should have stayed away!♫

[Cut to Vox who had just finished getting his coat tailored. He notices the crowd watching the advertisement of Alastor. He smiles and walks away with an idea. as Alastor continues singing.]

Alastor: ♫ While he hid behind a screen, we rose up he just lost. Now his medium is getting bloody rare!♫ [In a hallway in the TOE (XD. Im still laughing at it.) Tower, Alastor jumps and twirls.] ♫Hell's been better since he's been away, ♫ [He then pulls Mimzy and Rosie towards him] ♫Where's he been? Who gives a shit?!♫

[Cuts to Vox making his reappearance, as he starts his broadcast from his station attached to the top corner of the Hazbin Hotel.]

Vox: ♫Salutations! Good to be back on the air Yes, I know it's been a few years since someone with some REAL style treated Hell to a good show. Sinners rejoice!♫

Alastor: ♫What a dated voice!♫

Vox: ♫ Instead of a clout chaser radio freak.♫

Alastor: COME ON!

Vox: ♫ Is Alastor insecure, pursuing allure? Flitting between this fad and that. Is nothing working?

Alastor: Ignore what he's saying!

Vox: ♫Every day he's got a new format!♫

Alastor: YOU'RE LOOKING AT THE BETTER!

Alastor & Chorus: ♫He's the shit that is a loser.♫

Vox: ♫ Is Al as strong as he says it? Or is it based on his support? He'd be powerless without the other two.

Alastor: Oh, PLEASE.

Vox: ♫And here's the icing on the cake. He asked me to also join his team!♫

Alastor: Hold on now!

Vox: ♫I said no, and now he's pissy! And that's the truth.♫

[As Vox continues with his broadcast, Alastor gets so pissed that his eyes face starts to glitch and crash as he gets angrier.]

Alastor: [Glitches.] ♫You PRICK! I'll show y-you suffering!♫

Vox: ♫Uh oh, the radio is glitching!.♫

[Alastor couldn't handle his anger, causing him to overload his circuits with static electricity.]

Alastor: ♫ I'LL DESTROY YOOOOU-YOU LIT-T-LE-♫

[Before Alastor could say one more word, Vox lets uses his hands to cause an outburst that overloads everything from the TV screens to Mimzy's and Rosie's tv to everywhere in Pentagram City, causing a citywide blackout with the exception of the Hazbin Hotel.]

Vox: ♫ I'm afraid i got the better signal....Let's begin. [He slowly turns into his true demon form with every sentence.] I'm gonna make you wish that I stayed gone! [He puts down his staff for the first time.] Tune on in. Cus when I'm done, your status quo will know it's race is run! Oh, this will be fun!♫

[Vox makes one last evil laugh before cutting off his signal throughout the city, leaving Alastor dismayed that Vox is still as popular and powerful as he was last time.]

Alastor: FUUUUUCK!

[The scene cuts to the emergency meeting with Alastor, Rosie, and Mimzy to discuss a matter with Alastor as Susan passes out drinks to each of them.]

Alastor: We have a problem. Vox is getting close to little exorcist girl, so our main concern now is ensuring that no deal is ever struck between that [He slams the table with his fist.] BRAT and that flat headed screen.

Mimzy: And how exactly are we supposed to stop it?

[Rosie was putting so much glue on her revolver to decorate with glitter and marbles.]

Rosie: Eh. Why don't you put something inside them. That's how I get the bitches to behave.

Alastor: Well, maybe someone on the inside isn't such a bad idea. Do you think Katie would?

Rosie: No. Because that twig flatassed bitch won't even return ANY my calls.

Alastor: We need someone who Little Miss Bleeding Heart would take in.

Mimzy: Someone...pathetic, desperate, with no direct ties to us?

Rosie: I employ every down on their luck loser this side of Hell. Who the fuck is left?

Alastor: [Scoffs.] I think, I have... JUST the one. [As he slowly turns around, the sharks in the shark tank swim up to his shoulders, his eyes gleaming with a sinister grin for a plan he has in store.]

[Back at the hotel, Vox's black and white demons are currently fixing the hole in the wall as Lute and Adam returns. Lute throws herself onto a couch, exhausted.]

Katie Killjoy: Soooo? How'd it go?

Lute: [Sighs.] Not a single new recruit.

Katie Killjoy: Yeah well, who would wanna use their last days not fucking and/or fighting?

Papermint: Noone would. Hey do you have a cigarette?

[As Katie checks her phone, Adam hears a knock on the front door. He walks over to it and opens the door, only to find Adam behind it, holding his hat.]

Husk: Why, hello my dear-

[Husk is cut off by Adam punching him in the face. He falls when Adam brought out his harpoon at him. Husk cowers in fear with the tip barely at his neck, and held a peace sign gesture.]

Husk: Wait, wait, wait! I come in peace. [He makes two peace signs.]

Adam: What are you doing here?

[Lute appears behind Adam.]

Lute: Adam, what's going on? [She sees Husk and gasps.] Oh! Hello again!

Husk: I didn't come looking for a fight. I uhh.. I heard that you're helping people, people who want to be better?

[Lute lets out another gasp and runs over to grab his hand and lead him to the door of the hotel.]

Lute: Well. You heard right! Welcome to our home of healing, our resort of restoration, our-

[Katie then appears from the door and cuts off Lute.]

Katie Killjoy: Are you fucking nuts? I know you're dumb and naive. But this guy was literally trying to kill us like... 6 hours ago! And now you wanna bring him in here to live with us?

Lute: Absolutely! Yes. This place is about second chances, and who deserves one more than this furry...cat...special little man!

Katie Killjoy: [She turns to Adam.] Aren't you supposed to protect this place?

[Lute gives Adam puppy-dog eyes, begging him to give Husk a chance to live in the hotel. Adam decides to give in.]

Adam: [He sighs.] I guess he's not much of a threat without the war machine, or even with the war machine.

[Lute was so happy that she hugs Adam, lifting him up in the process and twirling around once.]

Lute: Oh! Thank you thank you thank you thank you! I love you sp much Adam! Dear Husker! Welcome. To the Hazbin Hotel!

[Lute leads Husk to the door inside of the hotel.]

Husk: Oh no darling! Thank you! You won't regret this.

[Katie follows soon afterwards.]

Katie Killjoy: Eh, I give you a week, tops.

[Lute gives Husk the tour of the hotel, introducing Tom Trench to him, the wall he blow up before it was fixed.]

Lute: So, this is the bar and the bartender. He's really sweet. This is the curtain, and this is the new wall after you broke the last one, heh, and oh! Oh! This is the-

[Adam grabs Lute to calm her down again.]

Adam: Baby, you don't have to show him every little detail.

Lute: Sorry, I'm just so excited to have another guest!

[Vaggie is playing with Keekee and with a string when Lute and Husk approach. Keekee hisses at the sight of Husk and scatters away while Vaggie turns to meet him.]

Lute: Over here we have our maid, Vaggie.

Vaggie: [She happily gasps.] The baddie is back! [She gets up on Husk and holds his collars, looking at him with insanity in her eyes and a very sadistic smile, which creeps out Husk.] Never leave me again.

Lute. We're uhm...About 80% sure she's harmless, totally harmless, and over here we have- [She nearly bumps into Vox.] Oh! Uh, Vox! Our gracious facility manager and host! You've met our newest guest Husk...hehe..

Vox: Ah yes! You're the one who ruined my coat! [His eyes glow with a violent temptation to rip him a part.] I definitely remember you now.

[Husk gulps nervously.]

Lute: Well, I guess this is a great time for your first lesson! [She clears throat.] "How to apologize!" The first step to becoming a better person is to admit when you are wrong, why don't you give it a try?

Husk: Yes..uhm.. Mr uhm.. tv Demon, sir, please forgive me for attacking you and ruining your very lovely coat.. uhm.. here.

[As a token of apology, Husk hands back the small fabric he tore from Vox's coat. Vox takes it and inspects the damage.]

Vox: Ah-Ho! Not many people have been able to take even this much off of me, not even my boyfriend, it must have quite a lot of meaning to you.

[Despite being generous, Vox spontaneously combusts the fabric tear into flames, leaving Husk and Lute stunned.]

Lute: Ookay...Anyways...

[The scene cuts to a group gathering introducing Husk to the hotel.]

Lute: Now, with a new resident, I think it's important we all get to know each other! So we are going to play a little game. Everyone, follow me. My name is Lute [she claps twice.] I like to sing! [She claps twice] and when we get to know each other it's the greatest thing! [She claps twice.]

Husk: Uh...My name's Husker. [He claps twice.] I like to build [he claps twice] and despite my stupid kitten Bois, I think I'm very skilled! [He claps twice.]

[When it was Katie's turn, she looked disinterested, looking up from her phone.]

Katie Killjoy: This is stupid.

Lute: This- is not- stupid! [She claps twice] It's just a game! [She claps twice.] Husk did it well so now please try to do the same! [She claps twice.]

Katie Killjoy: I am too sober for this.

Lute: Well, get used to it and learn how to play, this is gonna be your whole day! [She claps twice.]

[The next cut to an act with Papermint wearing a trench coat and a hat as she reads a script. Husk is also acting as a innocent child wearing a sailor suit, licking a comically large lollipop.]

Papermint: I hate this.

Adam: Just act.

Papermint: [He sighs.] "Oh, I'm a bad man on the streets who never got enough hugs, now, where's an innocent kid I can sell crack to?" Wow, who wrote this?

Lute: I did. It's great, right? Keep on going!

Papermint: "Hey you. Kid."

Husk: "Who, me?"

Papermint" "Yes, you. You look like a kid who could use some... devil's dandruff??" Oh, for fuck's sake. What the fuck is this?!

Husk: "Not me! I have to go home, and do my homework!"

Papermint: "Come on kid, it'll make you cool like me...[Bored] the crackhead."

Husk: "The only cool thing here is to say no to drugs! Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to not have sexual intercourse before i get married!"

[triumphant trumpet sting]

Lute: [She happily stands up and claps.] Yes! Oh bravo! Bravo! [She chuckles.] wow Husk! At this rate, you'll be redeemed in no time. I am so proud of you Husk! That was amazing! Im proud of both of you!

Husk: Thank you! Thank you! You like me! You really like me!

[Later at night, Katie goes to Tom's bar, picks up a whole bottle, and starts drinking alcohol. Out of the corner of her eye, she notices something...a cat tail. She follows it, finding Lute's office door opened, and takes a peek inside. There, she discovers that Husk is setting up a small camera in one of the bookshelves, a camera that belong to Alastor. Katie realizes what he's been doing and slams the door open.]

Katie Killjoy: Oh you pussycat piece of shit!

[Hearing Katie, Husk yelps in shock and afraid, realizing he's been caught.]

Katie Killjoy: You're working for those old entertainers?! I fucking knew there was something shitty about you!

Husk: I don't know what you're talking about!...whore bug!

[Katie, sufficiently angered, tackles Husk on the ground. She punches him in the face before wrestling with him.]

Husk: Get your aggressively average body...OFF OF ME!

[Husk gives her a kick on her waist, which causes Katie to back away. She then quickly snaps out of it. She now has Husk cornered. Right then, Lute and Adam woke up after hearing the scuffle.]

Lute: [She yawns as she rubs her eye.] What's going on?

Katie Killjoy: This little bitch is a traitor!

Husk: Preposterous! I would never betray you. You... are my best friends! [He hugs Adam & Lute.]

Katie Killjoy: Uh huh, then explain this!

[Katie lifts off one of the books to reveal a camera, much to Lute's shock. Husk realizes that his cover is blown and scurries away. He brings out his wrist watch to make contact with Alastor.]

Husk: Ah! Ah! Abort! Abort! S.O.S! Agent Husker in need of immediate rescue.

[Alastor immediately picks up.]

Alastor: Husker? Wait... you were caught?!? It hasn't even been, a day!

Husk: Please! You've got to get me out of here!

Alastor: Haha. I can't believe we thought you could handle even something this simple! Do us a favour, if they don't kill you, go ahead and do it yourself! You MISERABLE FAILURE!

Husk: [crying] I... I... just make it quick I guess...not that I deserve a quick death...

[Husk lies on the ground, with Adam is holding his harpoon ready to pierce the skull.]

Adam: Gladly.

[Right before Adam can put him out of misery, Lute stops him, and starts singing "It Starts With Sorry" ]

Lute: Wait! Don't do anything....Husk? [She extends her hand towards Husk.] ♫It starts with sorry, that's your foot in the door. One simple sincere sorry, spoken straight from your heart... The path to forgiveness, is a twisting trail of hearts! But sorry is where it all starts! ♫

Husk: ♫Who could forgive a dirtbag like me? I don't deserve your amnesty.♫

[Katie walks into frame with dual Tommy submachine guns in both hands with Adam tailing behind, holding his harpoon.]

Katie & Adam: ♫Can't we just kill him? Shoot him then decapitate him♫

Lute♫ That's an...option you could choose.♫

Katie & Adam: ♫It Works for us.♫

Lute: ♫But who hasn't been in his shoes? It starts with sorry.♫

Husk: ♫Sorry.♫

Lute: ♫Dig down deeper and say one sincere sorry!♫

Husk: ♫ I'm so sorry! ♫

Lute: ♫And look, your journey's already underway!♫

Lute & Husk: ♫It'll take time to cover your/my vast multitude of sins. But sorry is where it begins. It starts with sorry. ♫

[As the song ends, Vaggie is seen standing in the hallway in her bedwear, but is disappointed that Husk's song was bad, and that he is no longer a 'baddie'.]

Vaggie: I hated that song! You are so lame! [She kicks him in the leg and walks away.] And you are so not a baddie.

Lute: [She happily sighs.] Good first day! Let's get some rest!

[As Lute and the others leave with a wrist watch communicator still left in the office, Vox appears from the shadow of the dark hallway with a malevolent smile. He comes and picks up the watch before contacting Alastor on the watch.]

Alastor: WHAT?!?

[Alastor pauses when he realizes that Vox is the one calling him, showing fear in his screen face as Vox laughs.]

Vox: Sorry buddy. But you'll have to try harder than that next time!

[Vox crushes the watch with his bare hand as Alastor incoherently rages at him as the watch becomes incapable of creating audio, before Vox retreats back into the darkness, chuckling.]

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins inside the hotel.]

Lute: Alright gang. Since we are so much closer to eachother now, and some of you became friends, i think it's time we go to-

[Cut to Lu Lu World.]

Lute: Lu Lu world!

Papermint: Woooowwww!

Katie Killjoy: Why are we here?

Lute: Well...To have some fun! And to relax. I think you guys deserve it.

[With that, the group enters the Lu Lu park gate.]

Lute: (grinning) Alright, everyone! Let's start with some rides, or snacks, or-Huh...This place is a tad bit more vibrant than the last time me and Adam were here. They must have upgraded!

Adam: [He checks his phone.] No wonder why. A few months ago some imps exploded a rip off park of this place, and they upgraded so they won't get destroyed so easily.

Vaggie: [She excitedly stares at the rides] Did you guys see that? They have a roller coaster that goes upside down?! We’re definitely riding that thing first!

Katie Killjoy: [She rolls her eyes.] Oh Please, let’s not waste our time on some childish rides. I'm going to get some food. Gotta maintain my brand, you know?

Tom Trench: Im going to drink some alcohol.

Lute: [He laughs.] Just uh...Make sure to keep it together, Tom. We don't want you passing out...

Tom Trench: [He groans.] Fine. Fine.

Lute: [enthusiastically.] Well, why don’t we start with that roller coaster, then? Let's go now!

[Lute starts to walk off, but Adam grabs her by the wrist.]

Adam: Wait. Lute. Are you really sure you can handle it? After all. It’s not for the faint-hearted.

Lute: (confidently) Oh yes. I. Can! Bring it on! I can handle everything!

[A few minutes later, Lute pukes into a trashcan.]

Adam: [While patting Lute's shoulder.] There. There. Let it all out, honey.

Katie Killjoy: [fluffing her hair.] Ugh, my hair is a mess now! Why do they always make those rides so windy? Ugh! I need a brush!

Vaggie: Here ya go! [She hands Katie a hairbrush.]

Katie Killjoy: You're a lifesaver.

Tom Trench: (laughs) Well, at least it was good!

Katie Killjoy: Am i seeing you smiling?

Tom Trench: Don't get used to it, bitch.

Katie Killjoy: There's the Tom i know~

Adam: [He starts shaking his head.] I think we need a break. How about some snacks first?

Lute: Yeah...Good idea...Adam...

[Later at the food stalls.]

Katie Killjoy: [As she reads the menu.] They have deep-fried everything! I’ll take one of those giant corn dogs, thank you very much.

Vaggie: [holding up a funnel cake.] And I’ll have this! Perfect for sharing, right guys?

Vox: Always such a caring friend you are, Vagatha.

Vaggie: [Giggling.] Do you wanna sneak in and deep fry oil?~

Vox: Yes.

Lute: [She eats a giant cotton candy.] Adam. Look at this! It’s bigger than my head! Adaaaam! I knew coming here was a good idea! And look at them. They're talking happily! And even sharing! And Tom's not drinking any alcohol for once!

Adam: You clearly had an influence on them.

[An alarm bell suddenly starts.]

Adam: What the fuck?!

Papermint: Oh yeaaahhh...Vox And Vaggie snuck in an deep fried oil. No biggie. They used to do that ALL the time when we were alive.

Adam: THE FUCK DID THEY DO?!

Lute: Awww. Look at them. Doing father-daughter activities! [She happily bounces up and down while eating the cotton candy, Adam sighs and looks at Lute and smiles at her.]

Chapter Text

[Chapter open with a shot of KeeKee asleep on the sofa, with Lute, Adam and Razzle and Dazzle putting up a banner that reads "Happy first week, Husker!"]

Lute: Okay. That's perfect! Aah! I am so excited that Husk is staying at the hotel!

Adam: Um, Husk was just trying to take over the city with his weird steampunk bullshit a few days ago.

Lute: Well sure...But i haven't seen him try to pull any of that here.

[Husk suddenly comes in, rolling in a new machine that his Kitten nois are sitting on.]

Adam: And what the hell is that?

Husk: Oh, hello, brown haired male. It's my new invention, the Skin Flayer 11,000! I'm really looking forward to shooting the other residents.

Lute: What? But why?

Husk: Everyone here is being too nice. Obviously it must all be just a lie. I can sense that they are planning to kill me, but when? How? Where? I must be prepared for everything! Ooh, the new parts of my machine are here.

[Emily and another demon come in, wheeling in boxes of weapons. Husk runs over to them]

Emily: [She holds out clipboard.] Sign right here, please. [Husk signs the clipboard.] Thank you for your business. Enjoy your seraph purchase.

[Emily and the other demon walk out of the lobby as Husk takes the crate full of parts and weapons for his machine. As he walks back, Adam realizes who Husk was buying from.]

Adam: Seraph? As in, Sera Seraph? You are buying parts from an overlord?

Husk: Uh, of course. She's the top weapons dealer in Hell.

Adam: Okay, well that stops right now. [He takes Hsuk'a boxes away.]

Husk: Hey!

Adam: You absolutely cannot build weapons in this hotel. No one is trying to kill you. People are being nice because they want you to feel welcome.

[Husk looks at Adam with a wry expression. He peeks over his machine to scowl at the other residents and workers. Scene pan to Tom downing a bottle in the bar, then notices Husk looking at him. Katie, standing near the bar on her phone just flips Husk off. Vaggie, who is dusting a corner of the wall, looks at him and does a sinister-sounding giggle]

Husk: Hmm, I have my doubts.

Adam: Well, it's true. You have to trust us.

Husk: But I don't.

Lute: Well, why don't we focus on that for today's activities then?

Adam: Not before we lay some ground rules. No more building weapons, no more plotting against other guests, and you need to get rid of these things.

[Adam points at the Kitten Bois who were on the crate of weapons. 2 Kitten boys, having a tug-of-war over a laser, accidentally set it off and blow a hole in the roof, much to Adam's frustration.]

Adam: Oh! [He points at the ceiling.] See what i mean?! What did I just say?!

Husk: What? Not my little kittens. [He hugs the Kitten bois.] They do my evil bidding for me!

Adam: Do you want to stay here and redeem yourself?

Husk: [He narrows his eyes.] Yes...

Adam: Then no more kittens.

Husk: [with tears in his eyes.] All right, kitties. You've got to go. I [he sobs.] can't keep you here anymore!

Kitten bois: Okay, boss.

[They all follow Adam as he wheels Husk's' boxes away.]

Husk: No, don't resist. This is how it has to be!

[Husk begins crying as he watches his kitten Bois walking away. Lute, looking awkward, pats his shoulder]

[The scene changes to show Vox in his room, eating a deer carcass with a knife and fork while jazz music plays in the background.]

Vox: Hmmm...Reminds me so much of Alastor.

[Then suddenly, the jazz music stops with a record-scratching sound when Adam came by with the Kitten Bois behind him.]

Adam: Vox!

[Vox looks surprised for a second and his eyes go from the deer carcass on the table to Adam]

Vox: Do you mind? I'm in the middle of eating breakfast.

Adam: Husk's cats are all over the place, and I need you to get rid of them.

Vox: [He throws away the knife and fork, and stands up and summons his staff.]Oh, well, in that case, I'd be delighted to!

Adam: In a humane way.

Vox: Hmm. Well, that's a lot less fun [His eyes glow.] but I suppose I can take care of that on my outing today. [He walks out of the room.]

Adam: That's Great! [He looks at deer carcass.] And...That looks disgusting.

[The scene changes back to the hotel foyer, where Lute and the rest of the hotel's residents, minus Vox, are, with all of them except for Lute and Adam sitting on a sofa. Behind Lute and Adam is a stage with a banner on it that reads "Trusting 101"]

Lute: Hi, guys. Thanks for coming! It's been brought to our attention that there may be a little...uhm...tension in the hotel.

[As Lute explained, everyone is hating each other or on edge. Husk grabs Vaggie by the back of her shirt and makes to shoot her with his ray gun, but Adam snatches it out of his hands before he can.]

Adam: Tension that can be counterproductive to what we're trying to do here.

Lute: We think that this group could really benefit from,

[The background goes to yellow and Lute & Adam go flying up into the air.]

Lute: Trust exercises!

Adam: Trust exercises. [He begins falling.] Ah, shit!

[Adam falls on the floor as the yellow background cracks and breaks. Lute pulls Adam to his feet]

Lute: Adam. we rehearsed this many times. [She sighs.] It's all okay. [She turns back to everyone else.] We're doing trust exercises!

Tom Trench: So, uh, what's with the whole, uhh, this? [He gestures to the stage behind Adam and Lute.] I'm not about to put on some show for these fucking chumps.

Katie Killjoy: Oh, I will [she puts feet on Tom's legs], but it's cash up front, and I know that one [She points at Husk] cannot ever in a million afterlives, afford me.

Husk: Gross! I'd never think of it, twig!

Adam: Right, well, let's get started. Lute?

Lute: Actually, I thought maybe you could take the lead on this one. I trust everyone, so maybe you know better on how to build it properly! [She walks over to stand by Tom, Katie, Husk and Vaggie.]

Adam: What? Uhh, I don't know if I'm qualified, uh...

Lute: Oh, come on. It'll be easy! I'm sure you can handle this.

Adam: Yeah, um, [He looks at them. All of them are looking grumpy except for Lute and Vaggie.] Sure, I can handle this. No problem.

[Adam takes a deep breath and walks down one side of the stage.]

Adam: [In a drill sergeant style.] All, right, so we are starting with trust falls! Each of you are going to share something vulnerable with the group about yourself and then fall backwards, while the rest of the group catches you. Got it? Who wants to go first?

Lute: [She happily raises her hand.] Ooh, ooh, me me me! Me! Me! Me!

Adam: All right, get on up here.

[Lute runs past Adam and onto the stage.]

Lute: I...I love you guys. Like, really, really love you guys. So very much. You guys made my heart soft. [She falls backwards.]

[Adam runs forward and catches Lute.]

Adam: I gotcha!

Lute: Huh...That... felt... AMAZING! Katie, be a dear, why don't you go next?

Katie Killjoy: Fine. I guess. [She walks onto the stage.]

Adam: This time everyone needs to catch her okay? Unless you want me to hurt you. [He takes out his harpoon as a means of discipline for the others to come closer to the stage.]

Katie Killjoy: Something about myself, huh? How about this? I LOVE to put some-

[Tom threateningly points at Katie.]

Tom Trench: I swear to fuck if you say dicks inside of you pus-

Katie Killjoy: -movies on at night! Get your mind out of the gutter! [Katie falls backwards. And Tom catches her.] But, you know, dicks too!

[Tom drops her]

Tom Trench: Oops.

Katie Killjoy: [She turns to Husk.] All, right, new guy, you're up.

[The room goes dark and a melodramatic music plays. A spotlight shines on Husk.]

Husk: I... don't want to live without my minions. Nobody catch me! [He falls backwards. And Lute and Adam catch him together.] Aw. Damn it.

Adam: That's great. [He drops Husk.] Okay, good job. Uh, Vaggie?

[Vaggie runs past them onto the stage, giggling manically]

Vaggie: Sometimes, I like to eavesdrop on people while they are talking and start hitting my own head into a brick wall with a bright smile!

[Upon hearing this and seeing Vaggie, the others were disturbed by her sadistic nature . Vaggie flings herself off of the stage, but the others actively move out of the way to let her fall on the ground in the face. Despite that, Vaggie seems to enjoy that.]

Vaggie: [As she falls on her face.] Yay! Pain! I love it! [She runs back onto the stage, giggling to jump off again.] Pain!

Papermint: That's so creepy...

Husk: Yeah...

[Lute and Adam walk off to talk privately.]

Lute: I don't know if this is really working the way we'd hoped. Maybe we should-

Adam: Honey, you have to trust me here. I got this, okay? I'll figure something out.

[Katie appears behind them.]

Katie Killjoy: If you're in the market for some ideas, I've got just the thing for some "trust buildin".

Adam: [He sighs.] What do you have in mind?

[The scene changes to show a street in Pentagram City. Vox is walking down the street, closely followed by Husk's kitten bois who are his new minions.]

Kitten Boi: Oh, boy! What's the plan, boss? I like your suit! What can you do with your tv head? Can I touch your staff thing? Can I watch a movie on your head?..

[Vox's eye twitches as he walks down the street, a pained smile on his face. A shadowy person watches him from behind before appearing in front of him, revealing herself to be an Overlord, Velvette.]

Velvette: Hark, Vox. How fare thee this day?

[Vox makes a beep sound effect, looking slightly scared]

Kitten Boi: Who's that, boss? Want me to rough her up for you?

Vox: Follow in silence if you value your fur! [He taps the Kitten Boi's head with his cane before turning back to Velvette.] Greetings, Velvette!

[A demon comes out from an alleyway and sees Vox and Velvette.]

Bowler Hat Demon: Oh, holy shit!

Velvette: Ah, the weather doth become this fine day.

[A cowboy demon comes out of the backdoor after a fight, and was about to go back in when he notices Velvette and panics before fleeing.]

Cactus Cowboy Demon: Whoa! Uh oh!

Vox: Indeed, and it does look like we might have some acid rain this afternoon!

[A demon, seeing Velvette, pours gasoline over himself and sets himself on fire, screaming.]

Velvette: If our luck doth hold! I do revel in the screams. How art thou?

[Velvette begins walking down the street with Vox as tons of demons spot them and hide, run, or avoid getting in their way.]

Velvette: It has been an age since thou hath graced us with thy presence. Some hath spun wild tales of you falling to... holy arms.

Vox: [He laughs.] Oh, I just took a well-earned break, nothing serious. [He adjusts bow tie and coat in a window reflection as his eye shift side to side.] Though it's fun to keep everyone on their toes! [He laughs.]

Velvette: [She chuckles.] There too hath been rumor of thy involvement with the angel and her recent flight of fancy. Tell me, how dost thou fall in such folly?

Vox: [He  spins his cane.] That is for me to know. But please, do guess, I'd love to know the theories! [He continues walking.]

Velvette: [She chuckles.] T'would be grander folly by far to assume the workings of your mind, Vox. Thou hath been naught but an enigma since thy manifested in this realm!

Vox: Coming from someone as ancient as you, I take that as quite the compliment!

[Vox, Velvette and the Kitten Bois walk into an alleyway with a row of lifts. The security camera spots Velvette walking in view, but Vox's image glitches when the camera was on him. Velvette and Vox gets into one elevator. The kitten Bois attempt to follow, but Vox blocks them with his cane.]

Vox: No, no. I have a very important task for you. Stay here and guard the front until I return.

[The Kitten Bois salute and the lift begins its ascent.]

Kitten Boi: Oh, look. Bark is up there. [points to the lift, where one Kitten Boi is inside, pounding on the glass.]

Another Kitten boi: We have names?

[The lift reaches the top of the building and opens, where Vix, Velvette and Bark walk out. Bark watches as other Overlords come out of other lifts and go into another room. Bark follows them in and stands near Vox's seat. The overlord sitting next to Vox, Valentino, turns to look at Bark and he waves. He smiles widely at him, showing jer pointed, knife-like teeth. Bark hides behind Vox's chair as Sera Seraph walks to the head of the table.]

Sera: Welcome, Hell's sovereign overlords. I've invited you all here because you represent the controlling powers of our city. Together combined, you own millions of souls. Souls at risk with the new Extermination schedule. *
[She pounds a fist on the table.] We need to discuss what can be done to minimize the impact to our interest. [Velvette takes her seat.] Velvette, so good to see you, my friend.

Velvette: [She summons teacup and saucer.] Enchanted as always, Sera.

Sera: [She notices Vox.] Vox?

Vox: Yes, I know I've been absent some time. I'm sure you've all been wondering!

Sera: ...Not really. But welcome back in any case.

[Vox narrows his eyes and looks offended in Sera's general direction.]

Sera: This year's Extermination was brutal, far more even than years past. We have assessed that about 16% of the population was lost *slide is projected onto the wall behind her* With the angelic legions now returning twice as quickly, I think it prudent we-

[Sera is interrupted as Rosie opens the door and walks in, on the phone.]

Mimzy: Yes, I've got it handled, Alastor. Are you doubting me? Really? Me? That's what I thought. [She laughs.] Yes, I know. They're all a joke. [She laughs] Thank you, Al. See you soon. Kisses, darling.[she hangs up and sits down at the opposite end to Sera.]

Sera: Nice of you to join us, Mimzy. Will your... colleagues be joining?

Mimzy: No, they have better things to do than to listen to an old windbag who thinks she's tough shit. No. I'm here to represent.

Sera: Charming. So, as I was saying, we need to discuss- [She stops talking as Mimzy waves her hand in the air.]

Sera: Yes?

Mimzy: On the subject matter of discussion... [She takes out the head of an Exorcist and throws it onto the table. The other overlords look at it and mutter to each other.]

Valentino: Holy shit!

Vox: Oh! That looks tasty...

Sera: [She narrows her eyes.] Where did you get this?

Mimzy: We found it during Extermination day. If these Holy Rollers can be killed, the game has changed. [She stands on top of table.] We can take the fight to them. The others and I have come up with a full assault plan-

[Mimzy stops talking and she and the other overlords look at Velvette, who is sipping her tea loudly and aggressively to drown out Mimzy.]

Velvette: If it be true thee and thy colleagues desire to war with such meagre proof, thou art far more... foolish than I bethought.

Mimzy: [She scoffs] Meagre proof? It's a dead fucking Exorcist. I'd say that's pretty fucking definitive. It's enough proof! You going blind, old hag?

Velvette: We know not how this perished. Mayhaps t'was not by a demon's hand at all. If we rush to war without knowing, mightn't they purge all of Hell for daring an uprising?

[The other overlords mutter in agreement. Mimzy notices Sera's expression and smiles.]

Mimzy: Oh, I get it now. So Grandma here is too pussy to fight, so I guess there's no point, right? [She gets up in Velvette's face.] Oh, what's the matter, Fossil? Too senile to make a real power grab for-

[Right before she could continue, Sera starts to get into her face, expressing outrage while singing, Respectless.]

Sera: ♪You better show some respect! Check your behavior! no one can speak to Velvette like that? Did you expect us to sit back and take your, insolent brazen display?♪

Mimzy: [She laughs.] ♪You got it twisted, I'm not the one who needs a new attitude! Maybe you missed it, but I'm that #Bitch and I will do nothing less than what I please, whoo! I'm the backbone of my group, Mad that I acted respectless? Well, it's cause no one could respect you! ♪ [She walks across the table.] ♪ Sorry, group attendance! Since when are we Overlords too scared to fight? You're long past trending! Sorry, bae, but I ain't swiping right! You've lost your relevance-♪

Velvette: ♪We can't act without more intelligence. ♪

Mimzy: ♪ Ugh! No wonder I'm am respectless, I could eat you all for breakfast!♪

Sera: ♪You people are insane and uninformed! Smug wannabes who don't heed when you've been warned!♪ Mimzy: ♪'Oops!' Did I strike your nerves? 'Cause when I brought out the angel's head, [she throws the exorcist head across table.] couldn't help but observe, that your wrinkled face was turning red! And why are you avoiding a war? That's what the guns you sell are for! Thanks to me being respectless, one thing I'm starting to suspect is [She gets in Sera's face.] You know why this angel's headless! Do you have a disclosure?♪

Sera: ♪This meeting's over!♪

[Both Sera and Mimzy glare at each other. The other overlords are all staring at Sera and Mimzy. Vox finally decides to break the silence.]

Vox: This meeting was so productive!

Mijzy: Hm. Fine. Safe travels back to the nursing home, fuckers! [She walks out the door.] Kiss my ass bitches!<

Valentino: What the fuck? We just got here.

Emily: Sera?..

[The overlords all begin to get up and leave. All of them walk back towards the lift except for Sera, Emily, and Velvette, who walk towards another room. Vox notices this as he is walking towards the lifts.]

Vox: Hmm. Interesting. [He points at Bark with his staff.] You, little cat creature. I have a job for you.

Bark: Oh. Yes, boss!

Vox: Follow them!

[Bark salutes and runs after the overlords who went into another room.]

[The scene changes to Lute, Adam and Katie standing in a BDSM sex dungeon. Slapping noises comes in the background. Katie is looking satisfied with himself, Lute is looking incredibly shocked.]

Lute: Katie...with all due respect... What the actual fuck?!

Katie Killjoy: No activity requires more trust than BDSM, baby. No bond stronger than those formed through bondage! That's their motto!

[Katie points to a poster on the wall, which does indeed read "No bond stronger than those formed through bondage".]

Lute: Oh for fucks sake...I love the enthusiasm, Katie. But, umm, uh, What makes you think anyone would be into this?

[The camera pans to Papermint, who is getting massaged.]

Papermint: You know, I, I don't hate this. [He chuckles.]

Adam: Hmm...Not bad. Lute. Wanna do this when we get home?~

Lute: Adam. No.

[Vaggie appears near Papermint, and she is wearing a dominatrix outfit.]

Vaggie: I'm ready to punish some baddies! [She giggles.]

[Seeing Vaggie and her outfit makes Papermint give up.]

Papermint: [He gets up.] ...Never mind, that's my cue. I-I'm out of here!

[A demon with snake hair comes up behind Lute and starts giving her a massage. Other demons begin coming towards Lute and rubbing themselves against her]

Lute: Okay, hello there. Hi. Um. Hm. Hm,

[Adam pulls Lute away from the other demons.]

Adam: Back away from my baby. Ugh! I can't fucking believe I let you drag us here, Katie. This is disgusting.

Katie Killjoy: You literaly just wanted to fuck Lute a minute ago-

Adam: Cus that's different.

Lute: It's no big deal, Adam. You know, maybe I can just help, uh-

Adam: No. I told you you could trust me, and I'm not going to let you down. [He walks away from Lute] I just need to teach them, the way I was taught...

[As he said this, Adam smiles with excitement when he has the perfect trust exercise for all of them.]

[The scene changes to the group standing on a rooftop with half-destroyed buildings all around them. Everyone was shocked that the exercise has taken them to a live turf war battlefield with guns blazing in the background, demons screaming, and explosions booming.]

Lute: [shouting over the other demons' screaming.] THIS IS HOW YOU LEARNED TO TRUST PEOPLE?!

[On the ground, demons are shooting each other, brawling with weapons, and one demon was on fire, screaming and running around while others are still enjoying the carnage.]

Cactus Cowboy Demon: Yee-haw!

Punk Demon: I can go all night long, baby!

Cactus Cowboy Demon: Bring it on, bitch!

[Back at the rooftop, Adam makes a drill sergeant march.]

Adam: [In a drill sergeant style.] There is nothing stronger than the trust between comrades in arms. Buckle up, buttercups, because today you boys become men!

[There is a loud explosion in the background, sending shockwaves that sways Adam's hair with a satisfying smile. Adam advances on Husk]

Adam: You, [he picks up Husk.]

Husk: Wait, wait! I can't fight without my minions-

Adam: Are gonna survive by working together! [He throws Husk off the building before turning to Katie] And you,

Katie Killjoy: D-don't you even think about it-

Adam: You are gonna make this hotel work!

[As part of their trust exercise and Katie's punishment for the BDSM sex dungeon suggestion, Adam takes Katie up and throws her off of the roof.]

[Vaggie bounces next to Adam, her arms raised with excitement., and psychotically smiling with anticipation.]

Vaggie: My turn, my turn!

[Adam picks up Vaggie as Papermint and Tom go back into the inside of the building, not wanting to get involved and realizing how far this exercise has gone. Adam makes to throw Vaggie, but Lute snatches her up before she can.]

Lute: Adam No!

Adam: This is the only way they'll learn, Lute.

Lute: No, it's not. [She puts down Vaggie.] There are other ways. It just takes some time!

[As Lute talks to Adam, Vaggie looks back at Lute, asking to be lifted. When Lute ignores her, Vaggie jumps off of the building herself. In the off-screen background, Husk, Katie, and Vaggie are being heard fighting against hordes of demons.]

Adam: Time we don't have! How many Exterminations will have gone by before these idiots get their shit together? How many times will we have to watch the people you are trying to save be killed before we make headway? [He turns away from Adam.]

Lute: Adam...

Adam: I took charge today and it all went sideways. I'm supposed to make your dreams a reality. I'm supposed to protect you. [He takes Lute by the shoulders.] I'm supposed to never fail you. [He goes back to the edge of the rooftop.]

Lute: But, Adam. You didn't fail me, you're not-you're not-

Adam: If I can't help you, then what's the point of me?

Lute: Adam, don't say that! You do so much! It's-

Adam: I'm sorry. I'd... I'd like to be alone for a minute.

[As Lute walks to the other side of the rooftop, an exhausted Katie comes out of the door, carrying a battered, but intact Husk, before he throws him onto the roof.]

Katie Killjoy: We made it back up...

Lute: [She walks to door.] Let's go home, guys.

Katie Killjoy: Ugh! I just walked up with these idiots all those stairs!

[As Katie pulls Husk back down the stairs, Adam stays on the rooftop by himself, looking at all the destroyed buildings around him.]

[The scene changes to show Sera, Emily, and Velvette all in a room together, with Bark spying on them from behind a pot plant. Sera pours herself a drink, before beginning to down the bottle instead of the glass she poured for herself.]

Velvette: Sera, what troubles thou? Losing thy composure is unlike thee.

Sera: It's nothing, Velvette, really.

Velvette: The felled angel... t'was by thy hand, was it not?

Sera: Let's not talk about it.

Emily: Sera...I think, maybe...maybe she should know.

Sera: Nobody should know. I did what I had to do. I am not discussing this.

Velvette: [She lays a hand on Sera's shoulder.] ♪What weighs on your soul, old friend? I implore you to share the load! If it was thou who slew the angel, why not let your strength be known? ♪

Sera: I always thought... ♪That I would keep blood off my face. But when that thing attacked, I had to act, to cross that line and keep her safe. But if anyone knew, then all of Hell would rise to war, and who's to say? Would survive? Im afraid. I might lose the one that I was killing for! So, I'll [She wraps her arms around Emily.] I'll be your keeper! Do whatever it takes, I'll make the mistakes!♪[Sera is also speaking to Velvette who seems surprised that Sera wants to keep her safe as well] I'll keep you safe and keep this secret.♪

[Scene change to Adam, now at the foot of the hotel and beginning to climb up it]

Adam: ♪When I first saw you, you made me feel like a stranger in a brand new place. And it felt so good to have someone by me! But there's so much I wished that I could say. So I, I'll be your armour. Do whatever it takes, I'll make the mistakes. I'll spend my life being your partner.♪

Sera: ♪And I don't know what we might face ♪♪ But I know I can't replace you. So I'll do anything to save you.♪ Adam: ♪And I will try to make your dreams come true♪

Both: Whatever we go through! ♪I know I♪ Sera: ♪I'll be your keeper♪ Adam: ♪I'll be your armour. Whatever it takes♪ Sera: ♪I'll make the mistakes♪ Adam: ♪ I'll make the mistakes. Whatever it takes♪

[The scene changes to the Kitten Boiz scavenging for weapons, parts, and garbage in a dumpster.]

Kitten boi: Ohhhh, this one smells like fun [He laughs.] Oh, I love the garbage.

[The elevator door rings, and Vox is waiting for the Kitten Boi, Bark, to return after spying on Sera and Velvette. He's bout to join the others when Vox stops him.]

Vox: So, what did you hear?

Bark: First, the old lady w-was all, "Y-you're not yourself. You're the one who killed the angel," a-a-and, she was all , "♪Whatever it takes♪" and then-

Vox: Oh wait. What was the last thing?

Bark: She killed the angel?

Vox: Interesting. Lets keep this between us [He makes a evil grin that statics the whole screen for a brief moment.] Shall we?

Bark: [unfazed] You got it, boss! [He salutes to Vox.]

[Back at the inside of the hotel, Lute looks down after a disastrous trust exercise. Adam came on the balcony to see her, as he waves at her.]

Adam: Hey.

Lute: Hey.

Adam: I'm sorry I got so crazy today. I didn't want it to go like that...Im sorry...

Lute: [She takes both of Adam's hands into her hands.] No, no, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I put pressure on you. We work as a team. I guess I just thought all this would be easier if you lead, but, we'll figure it out, together. I mean, look what your exercise did for them.

[The camera pans over to Katie, Husk, and Vaggie laughing amongst themselves after one crazy battle against the demons in a turf war.]

Katie Killjoy: And then, when that buff guy started beating the shit outta you!

Husk: [He laughs.] Yes, and with the dismembered arm, Yes, that was... particularly unpleasant. (dejected)

Vaggie: [She giggles.] I liked that part. So very much.

Tom Trench: Well... hey, at least you can take a beating like a champ. [He comes over and pats Husk.] You did okay, new kid.

Papermint: Yeah. You were good.

Husk: ...Really? Oh well, I suppose I did get into a little of the old, rough and tumble today. And uh, thank you for pulling me out of there.

[Everyone laughs with enjoyment, but Vaggie slightly ruins the moment when by continuously laughing manically, causing the other three to stop and witness her insanity.]

Adam: Well, how about that?

[The front door opens, and Vox enters the hotel with the Kitten boi minions tailing behind him. Adam notices them and calls out to Vox.]

Adam: Vox, failed to get rid of the cats, I see.

Vox: Yes, well, the little monsters prove to be rather useful.

Adam: Why don't you give them back to Husk?

[Upon hearing this, Husk gets teary when Adam is allowing him to keep his minions.]

Husk: [Teary eyes.] Really?

Adam: Yeah. After today, I guess I can trust you with them. But seriously, no. more. weapons.

[Husk gets emotionally and runs down to hug his Kitten bois as Vox walks away.]

Husk: Ah. My babies. Yay. Ah, it's so good to have you back. Now, go clean my quarters this instant!

[At his command, the Kittens immediately scatters away as Lute and Adam watched them leave.]

Lute: Maybe, things will move fast than you think.

[At the end of the day, Husk is seen getting ready for bed in his room with his Kitten bois in tow and pajamas.]

Husk: Ah! How was your day with Vox, my minions?

Bark: It was awesome boss, I went to this meeting and there was a 4 eyed lady, an old woman, and a mothman

Husk: Mmm, that's nice.

Bark: And the four eyed lady killed an angel! And I... was not supposed to talk about it.

[Husk does not believe him at all]

Husk: Oh, I'm so sure and maybe you'll meet Martians tomorrow, but now is time for sleep. Good Night Kitties.~

[The Cars roll over to Husk and cuddle together as Bark yawns to sleep.]

Chapter Text

[Chapter opens to Adam sleeping in bed, he squirms before waking up, yawning and rubbing his eyes. He turns to the left side, however, Lute isn't there.]

Adam: Lute? [He notices Lute left her robotic arm in the bedside table, he picks it up and walks away.]

[Cut to Lute panicking and planning out everything with lots of paper with strings attached with everyone else watching her, disturbed by her behavior.]

Lute: I'm just not quite understanding why it's not working. Okay, okay, think Lute. Think, think, think, think, think, think, think, think. Okay if I do this, it's going to be- [She gasps] I have trust falls every single morning. We can do- [She gasps again.]

Katie Killjoy: Yikes.

Papermint: Yikes...Indeed...

Lute: C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, Lute!.

Adam: Lute?... Sweetie? Are you, uh...Are you okay?

[Lute looks back with sleep-deprived, insane look in her eyes that red veins were shown in the sclera.]

Lute: Nope, no! Not really! No! No! No! Haha! I've been up all night trying to figure out why the hotel isn't working. [She crushes paper with her hand] We've done trust falls. We've tried sharing our feelings. We only have a couple months left before the angels come- [Her third eye opens abd she laughs maniacally before turning back to normal] And at this rate...

Adam: I think...Maybe it's time-

Lute: NO.

Adam: to call-

[Lute gets up close to Adam's face, holding his cheeks desperately.]

Lute: DON'T YOU DARE SAY IT!

Adam: Lilith...

[Lute groans, knowing what this means for her.]

Adam: Lutey, I know you don't want to, but we need every advantage we can get.

Lute: She let Lucifer allow the extermination to happen to begin with. They just had a meeting and said, "Go ahead and kill everyone!"- [She gasps.] Wait. That's it!

Adam: To kill...everyone?..

Lute: No! She could get me a meeting with Heaven!

Adam: Didn't we already try that once?

Lute: Well, yeah. But that was with that snake guy, he was an asshole. A huge one. But he isn't in charge of all of Heaven. We could go to the top! There's sure to be some angels who will listen.

[Lute scrolls through her contacts. In her contacts, before her thumb lingers on top of her "Lili". However, she was hesitant to call her.]

Tom Trench: What's the holdup? You got mommy issues?

Lute: No, we were close. But after a fall out we had, she never really wanted to see me again. Tho she sometimes calls...But only if she's bored or like, needs me to do something.

[Tom was aware that this is just an excuse that Lute does have issues with Lilith and turns to the others.]

Tom Trench: Mommy issues.

Katie Killjoy: Well I'd like to meet the tittie haver in charge.

[Vaggie was holding a knife in her hands.]

Vaggie: The ultimate baddie. [She laughs like a gremlin with excitement, holding a knife while Katie takes her knife away without her knowing.] I bet she's scary.

[Scene cuts to Lilith's house, she's making snarling noise as she was working on something. As the scene goes, her room is revealed to be filled with a lot of stacks of papers, and stacks of them filled the boxes and tubs.]

Lilith: That's it... Almost there... Now presenting...My new movie script! Ha ha! And it has a fire ending! Hoo hoo hoo! Hold the applause! Please, okay. Oh, thank you, thank you. Oh God, who am I kidding, This sucks! [She throws the paper at the floor and looks sad. Suddenly her ringtone plays. She picks up her phone, and was shocked who was calling her.] Lute? My daughter calling, lute, daugther calling! OH! Uhm-uh. Hello, Lute. H-Hey, heyyy, hey Luella. No! No. That's not good. Oh, this is the first time she's called you in 7 years. This has to be perfect. [She takes a deep breath before she picks up phone] Hey, bitch!

[Intercut conversation between Lilith and Lute during the phone call from the hotel to her house.]

Lute: Hi, Lilith...

Lilith: Hey! How are you? Oh ho. Wh-Wh-where are you these days?

Lute: You know where I am, Lili. I've told you before.

Lilith: You have? Oh, yeah uh, well, you know, I um uh-

Lute: I told you when you called me five months ago, or did you not listen?

Lilith: No, no, no, no. Just, you know, just forgot. I've just been really busy! Ya know, with, um… Important things. [She kicks a stack of papers]

Lute: Well, I'm actually running a hotel to rehabilitate sinners. Maybe you saw our commercial.

Lilith: Oh… sadly, I missed it. heh heh. You know I haven't been watching much TV lately. Scrambles the brain. [She makes silly noises]. But, hey, A hotel! Fun!

Lute: [She sighs.] Listen, Lilith. I've got… kind of a big ask.

Lilith: [She coughs and sets down her tea.] Yeah, of course. Anything in my power is yours for the asking. You just name it~

Lute: I need to speak to Heaven. Well, whoever's in charge up there, above Pentious, above anybody, whoever is in charge of Heaven now. I need to go to the top.

Lilith: Oh, no. No~ No, no, no, no, Lute, no, no, no. That's, uh hah, no.

Lute: [angrily] Look Lilith, [normal] I don't ask you for much, I never have, but this, this is really important to me. It's the most important thing I've ever done. And I... need you. I need your help.

Lilith: I don't know...about that...

Lute: Please, just come see what I'm trying to do. You'll see why it's a really good idea. And Heaven is bound to agree if I get the chance to talk to them. Please, Lili...

Lilith: Wait....You're... inviting me over? Absolutely! Hohooo! I'll be there in an hour. [She hangs up] ♪ Lute wants to see me~! ♪ Take that abandonment issues!

[Back at the hotel, Lute and Adam prepare for Lilith's arrival.]

Lute: Welp, we have an hour until he gets here.

Adam: Okay people, [Everyone stands at attention, but Tom spills coffee over himself and Vaggie collapses on the floor.] The queen is on her way. So we are going to get this place presentable and we are going to make an amazing impression. Vamanos!

Papermint: Yeah. Im kinda busy, im sadly not gonna be here to welcome the Queen.

Adam: Excuse me-

Papermint: I need to go out for something. I'll be back by midnight. Or even earlier. Promise. Okay bye. [He leaves the Hotel.]

[Everyone scatters to get the place tidy and ready for Lilith. Husk and Vaggie bake cookies, then Vaggie starts sweeping and Husk is cleaning up. Vox walks in and watches Razzle and Dazzle put up a "Wellcum Daddy" banner up. Katie puts on some makeup before closing the mirror, revealing to be Vaggie staring creepily at her, causing Katie to recoil back in surprise.]

Lute: [sighs] Okay everyone, it's showtime!

[Lute opens the door, revealing to be Lilith, excited to see Lute.]

Lilith: Luteee!

Lute: Hey, Li-

[Lute doesn't get to finish because Lilith hugs her really tight like a bear. Unbeknownst to them, Vox was right behind them, with his wicked smile strained and left eye twitching in anger when Vox saw Lilith.]

Lilith: [hugs Lute] Oh, it's so good to see you. Haha!

Lute: [Strained] It's uh, good to see you, too, Lilith. [She pushes Lilith off to give herself a breather. And she clears throat] Welcome! to the Hazbin Hotel!

[Two Kitten Boiz pops some party poppers as a warm welcome. KeeKee curls up to Lilith and rubs her face against her legs. Lilith notices her and goes all enchanted by her cuteness. She crouches down and rubs her head.]

Lilith: Aw. hewwo, KeeKee! [Razzle and Dazzle flies by and she greets them.] Razzle, Dazzle. [She makes endearing noises] Oh, look how much you haven't grown! Still fun sized. You taking care of my wittle girl? [She speaks in a very deep ominous threatening tone] You better be… [she snickers] Wow, this place sure looks, uh... Uh-huh. Yeah. Uh-huh. It's got a lot of character. [She finds the bar at the corner and was immediately repulsed by it.] OH! What in the unholy hell is that?!

[Vox reappears from the fog and in front of Katie.]

Vox: Just some of the renovations we had done. Adds a bit of color, don't you think?

[Lilith looked at him suspiciously.]

Lilith: And you are?

[Vox reappears behind Lilith, catching her attention.]

Vox: The name's Vox. It's a...Pleasure to be meeting you, ma'am. Quite a pleasure! [He shake's Lilith'a and wipes his hand in somewhat hidden disgust] It's nice to finally put a face to the name.

Lilith: Who is...Who is this? Who is this now? Are you the bellhop?

Vox: Haha! No! I am the host of the hotel. You might have heard of me from my radio broadcast.

Lilith: Hmm. Nope! I guess that's why Lute called it the Has-been Hotel! Hahaha.

Vox: Ha ha ha! It was actually my idea.

Lilith: Ha ha ha! Well, it's not very clever!

Vox: [Strained] Ha ha! Fuck you, bitch.

[With each sentence, Vox and Lilith were getting closer to fighting before Lute gets in the way to stop them in between.]

Lute: Okay! Enough. Okay, anyway. Lili, look at this lovely parlor where people can get to know each other and share secrets and stories and intimate feelings! Without Vox, we wouldn't have been able to pretty it up this much.

Vox: Lute here, has a very unique vision. I am happy to fulfil her bizarre requests. [He places hand on her shoulder.]

[Lilith is grumpy that he is winning over Lute more than she is, which makes her very angry to the point where she growls in frustration.]

Lute: Oh, thank you, Vox.

Vox: She is quite an impressive young lady. [condescendingly] We're all very proud of her.

Lilith: [She clears her throat] Lute, darling, why don't you show me your OTHER friends?

[Lilith walks right between them before pointing to the others at the table. Katie tries to get a cookie from Husk but he doesn't want Katie touching the cookies without Lilith trying them and hides them underneath him.]

Lute: Oh, yes, of course. Right. Sooo. You already know Adam...

Adam: [He stares into Lilith's eyes] Lilith...

Lilith: Adam.

Lute: Well. Nice news. He's my boyfriend now!

Lilith: Oh ho my good golly! You like my ex? AND you like guys? So do I! We have so much in common! Haha. Nice seeing you...again. Adam.

Adam: [Annoyed] You too.

Lute: And these is are our guests. Katie, and Husk. Wehave a third guest. But he went out.

[Husk hears his name being called and stands at attention, making a salute to her.]

Husk: Your Majesty! [He falls down into the cookies right before Katie takes one for herself.]

Katie Killjoy: Hiya Tall queen~

Papermint: Hii.

Lute: Tom is our bartender. And Vaggie here, is our maid.

Tom Trench: Nice to meet you.

[Vaggie is super-excited to meet the ultimate baddie girl that she scurries over and climbs up on her dress.]

Vaggie: Hi, i clean this place.

[Suddenly the chandelier falls and produces a huge amount of dust which makes everyone cough. Lilith and Vox were at the chandelier, and Lilith knows Vox did that on purpose.]

Lilith: [Laughs]. Alright, then. [With one flick of her finger, the fallen chandelier disappears and starts to sing.] ♪Looks like you could use some help. From the big boss of Hell herself. Check out mommy's glowing reviews on Yelp!♪

Lilith puppets: ♪ "Five stars!" "Flawless!" "Greater than great!"♪

Lilith: ♪Oh with a punch of a pentagram, I Wap! Bam! Boom! Alakazam! Usually I charge a sacrificial lamb. But you get the family rate! ♪

Lilith & Lute: "Thanks, mommy!"

Lilith: ♪Who needs a busboy now that you've got the chef?♪

Chorus of Lilith lookalikes: ♪Woh-oh-oh♪

Lilith: ♪Golden menu and free of expense. I'll even rig the game for you because I'm the ref! Some champagne fountains, caviar mountains, that's just to start!♪

Vox: ♪Who's been here since day one? Who's been faithful like a nun? Makes you chuckle with that old-timey pun? Your executive producer!♪

Lute: That is true!

Vox: ♪I'm your guy, Your day-to-day. Your chum, your steadfast hotelier. Remember when I fixed that clog today?♪

Vaggie: I was stuck inside of that. Thank you so much, sir!

Lute: Aww. You.

Vox: ♪I'm truly honored that we have such a bond.

Lute: Awwww!

Vox: ♪You're like the daughter that I wish that I had.♪

Lilith: Uh, what?

Vox: ♪ I will care for you just like the child I spawned.♪

Lilith: Hold on now!

Vox: ♪It's a little funny, You could almost call me... DAAAAAAAD!♪

[Angered, Lilith plays golden fiddle aggressively as he gets closer to Vox. When suddenly, a piano drops out of the sky and Vox plays piano aggressively. Lilith then plays the accordion horribly out of tune with the song, Vox just glares at Lilith.]

Vox: ♪They say when you're looking for assistance. It's more smarter to pick the path of least resistance!♪

Lilith: But others say that in your needy hour. ♪There's no substitute for some, angelic power! Who just happens to love you like family!♪

Vox: ♪Sadly there are times a strained parent is a dud. They say the family you choose is the best!♪

Lilith: [Sing talking] ♪ What a bunch of losers!♪

Vox: ♪Just get out of my song!♪

Lilith: ♪ Your song? I started this song!♪

Vox: ♪I'm singing it, i'll finish it!♪

Lilith: OH, YOU TACKY PIECE OF—!♪

[Right before Lucifer and Alastor could get at each other's throats, Lute gets between them.]

Lute: Alright. That's enough before you two kill each other.

[As song ends, everyone in the hotel were just looking at them.]

Vaggie: I liked that song.

Vox: Well. As much as i sould love to mess with "her royal highness" Lute and I have a tour to continue.

[Lilith heard this and takes Lute by the arms before dragging her front.]

Lilith: I'm sure Lute here can handle showing me around. She could even bring Adam along.

[Vox appears in front of them.]

Vox: Nonsense! [He grabs Lute and drags her forward] We started the hotel together, and we'll show it off together. Right, Lute? [He stops dragging Lute so she can be the one to lead the tour for Lilith.]

Lute: Oh, right. Come on. [She leads on with Adam and Lilith following behind.]

[And with that, Vox leaves to follow the tour.]

Katie Killjoy: Could you give me a drink?

[Meanwhile in the creepy dark hallways, Lute was showing Lilith about the interiors of the hotel.]

Lute: So, once we have the proof that redemption does work, this whole hotel will be filled to the brim with demons wanting to check out of this palce, and into Heaven! We just need a little time to prove it. The sharing circles haven't been working as fast as I hoped tho.

Adam: And we have almost been able to find all of Katie's stashes... Almost all of them. [He opens the door to the balcony and lets Lute and Lilith walk out first.]

Lute: So, once that's out of the way it should be much smoother sailing.

Lilith: Well, that certainly is, uh... is-is something.

Lute: So… what do you think?

Lilith: About what?

Lute: What do you think about the hotel?

Lilith: Oh yes, it does… it does look much better now, doesn't it? [She chuckles.] Ya know, but I'm thinking this railing needs work, one good push and you'd just go right over the edge! [She lays on the railing.] Whoopie, bye bye! [She chuckles.]

Lute: What? No, no, the plan, Lilith! What do you think about using the hotel to help sinners?

[No matter how much Lilith hates to admit it, she wants Lute to get one thing straight about what her plans are going.]

Lilith: [She exhales] Alright, look...I mean, look… I love that you just want to see the best in people, but these sinners… You know, they're just the worst. I...I don't know how much you can realistically expect from them in Heaven. [She adjusts her crown.] Hohooo boy, Heaven is not exactly as carefree as you might think. Yeah, they have rules. Lots of rules, and they aren't very open minded as you'd hope. You know that. Adam knows it. I know it. We both know it. They casted me and Lucifer out for a huge reason. But you and Adam just didn't want to kill demons anymore! Imagine what they'll do if sinners enter Heaven!

Lute: These are your people! You must care a little! And I... I have to try to make them better!

Lilith: My "people", Lute, are awful! They were gifted free will and look what they did with it! Everything's terrible! [SHE wheezes.] I just...I don't want you to put yourself on the line for people like-

[Lilith was interrupted when a loud thud shakes the hotel, rocking the three of them on the balcony.]

Adam: What's going on now?!

Lilith: Well, like that...

[To prove her point, Lilith gestures to dozens of shark demon mafia members on the ground. The shark mafia were armed to the teeth with guns, melee weapons, and a battering ram as they try to ram the front door open. The leader of the shark mafia looks up at the balcony.]

[Inside, the lobby, a portal opens up by Lucifer and all three of them return to the lobby as the shark mafia continues to ram the front door.]

Adam: What the fuck?!

Lute: What's going on?!

Husk: Seems like Sharks attacking us.

Katie Killjoy: Captain obvious!

Tom Trench: Hah. Kitten Obvious.

Katie Killjoy: Good one.

[Before Lute could even respond to them, the windows and the walls were barraged with fireballs from the outside. The windows crashed and the floors are hammered with fireballs. Lute and Adam screamed as more fireballs came raining on them. Vaggie was horrified that the windows were destroyed after cleaning it so long ago. Katie scoots back to her seat after a fireball nearly hits her and she pulls Tom along with her.]

Vaggie: No! Not my windows!

[Everyone in the hotel scrambles in panic and defense as more fireballs fall down on them. Lute dodges one of the fireballs close to her. Vaggie was nearly crushed by one fireball before Katie picks her up, shocked.]

Adam: Look out!

Katie Killjoy: What the fuck?!

[Katie throws Vaggie out of the way, but she scurries around all over the lobby while Lilith remains composed, oblivious to their dire situation. The lobby was on fire from the fireballs. Tom tries to put out the fire close to his bar, stomping on it in anger. Katie runs for cover, and Husk is screaming as fireballs meteor through the windows. While everyone finds some cover, Lilith gives Lute a lecture that makes her angry enough to where her eye twitches.]

Lilith: Do you see it now? This is exaaactly what I'm talking about, Lute. You build up something nice, and then you invite people in and offer them everything and they just bring violence and chaos to your doorstep. It doesn't matter how well intentioned you are, they're always going to disappoint you.

[Vaggie was on the floor recovering the windows that were shattered, unaware that falling debris was about to crush her.]

Husk: Vaggie, come along! [He grabs Vaggie before debris nearly crush her.]

[Adam then appears with his harpoon in his hands.]

Adam: Alright. All of you, get to a safe place. I'll take care of this.

[Before Adam could go out to deal with the mafia, Vox appears out of nowhere and places a hand on Adam's harpoon to lower it.]

Vox: No need, my dear, leave it all to me. I think it's time I remind everyone why I am here.

[Upon saying those sentence, Vox turns demonic with his eyes glitch out. He then goes into his demonic form. The mafia outside were just about to reload their catapult when they notice the eerie greenish glow before Vox turns to his sinister demon form.] I will remind you all, why you do not to mess with the TV Demon! [He laughs evily.]

[With Vox now in his demon form, He grabs several of the shark demons, and he ends up killing several mafia membets. The remaining gangsters panic at the sight of the Vox's power. Vox's body then grows larger and his limbs become longer before exiting the front door with a sinister unmoving grin.]

Vox: I will devour all of you! [He heads out to massacre the mafia for attacking the hotel.]

[As Vox exits the front door, Lute, and Lilith come out to watch the bloodbath. Lute was totally appalled that Vox is truly terrifying and maliciously monstrous. Lilith nodded once to make her point. From the back point of view from the camera, Lilith lectures Lute about the sinners while Vox devours and kills the mafia outside. Body parts spread all over the front door, while Lilith was oblivious to the mess.]

Lilith: Mhm, you see? What did i tell you? Sinners are just some violent, sadistic psychopaths, hell bent on causing as much pain and destruction as they can. There's really no point in trying.

Lute: Lilith stop! He's defending the hotel! [She turns to see Voy eating a mafia shark.] It's a bit more sadistic than I'd hoped, but he's doing it for me! How come he can have faith in me but the woman i used to love as a mom as a kid doesn't?!

[Nearby, behind the turned table, Katie, Husk, and Tom saw the melodrama that was occurring between Lilith and Lilith.]

Katie Killjoy: Ooh, drama.

[Excited, Katie gets out a bucket of popcorn to watch the scene unfold. Tom also picks up a handful of popcorn to eat.]

[Back outside, Vox has finished massacring the mafia as he shrinks back down to his usual self, now satisfied that he's killed a lot of demons today.]

Vox: Oh, how much i missed getting to let off steam.

[Adam goes outside to talk to Vox.]

Adam: The actual fuck?! Whatever. Atleast you protected us. But why the hell would shark demons come here?!

Vox: I think i exactly know why. And because of who. Think about it. Which one of us isn't at the hotel? Hmm?

[Back inside the hotel, the melodrama between Lute and Lilith continues.]

Katie Killjoy: This is really getting good.

[In a heartfelt scene, Lilith retreats to the lobby while Lute follows her behind.]

Lute: Lili… just... help me out. I never ask you for stuff.

Lilith: I... I can't help you. I simply can't.

Lute: Why can't you?

Lilith: Lute. I already told you why! Heaven never listens. They didn't listen to me. They didn't listen to Adam. Not to anyone. And they won't ever listen to you either.

Lute: You don't know that for sure!

Lilith: But i do! I know it for sure! [Tears start filling she eyes, as she begins to express jer feelings through a song.] ♪ You didn't know what i... What i had to go throught back then... my dreams were too hard to make real...And in the end. I had to make it end...Now you're the only thing worth fighting for.♪ [While she is singing, silhouettes of higher angels appear, surrounding Lilith with spears. Next shot shows Lute being surrounded by spears that slowly come towards her, with Lilith noticing them in horror, and pulls Lute away on the other side to defend her.] More than anything, more than anything. I swear to protect you more than anything♪

Lute: [speaking] Lilith, I don't need you to protect me from anything.

Lilith: I just...I don't want you to be crushed by them like- Like I was.

Lute: Oh Lili...♪When I was young, I never really knew what you were♪

[In a flashback scene, a young baby Lute sneaks out of heaven and into Hell, and she saw Lilith walking on the streets and flies towards her.] ♪Compared to you, I was so small.♪

[Lilith notices her and picks her up into her arms.]

Lute: ♪But then you showed me your stories, and I was always in awe. The tales about your lofty dreams, I listened breathlessly. Imagining it could be me.♪

[A silhouette of a six winged angel appears and takes baby Lute out from Lilith's arms. As the angel flies back into Heaven, Lute looks at Lilith sadly while Lilith gazes at her with sadness too.]

Lute: ♪So in the end, it's the view I had of you, that showed me dreams can be worth fighting for.♪ [The Flashback ends to the present.] ♪More than anything, more than anything. I need to save those demons more than anything.♪

Lilith: [She smiles at Lute.] ♪ I've been dyin' to find out who you really are.♪

Lute: ♪ I've been wanting the same thing.♪

Lilith: ♪Seems like you have never changed.♪

Lute: ♪Took you long to realize♪

Lilith:♪ I've missed your smile♪

Lute & Lilith: ♪ All that I'm hopin', now that my eyes are open, is that we can start again, not be pulled apart again. [Lilith opens two dark wings, and picks Lute up and opens a portál and flies up with her.] 'Cause in the end, You are part of who i became!♪

Lilith: ♪I'll always support your dream, no matter what.♪

Lute: ♪And who could ask for more?♪

Lilith: ♪More than anything (Lute: More than anything) More than anything (Lute: More than anything)♪

Lute & Lilith: ♪I'm grateful you're my (Lute: mother)/ (Lilith: daughter) more than anything. More than anything.♪

[As the song ends, Lilith and Lute return to the lobby after traveling across the other dimension. Husk was teary after seeing the sweet tendered moment between Lilith and Lute.]

Husk: Aww, that was ssssweet.

Lilith: [She sighs as she looks at Lute.] Okay, I can get you the meeting, but once you're in Heaven, I won't be able to go with you. Will you be ok?

Lute: Don't worry, I'll be fine.

Lilith: That's my girl. [She sighs] Good luck kiddo. [And with that, Lilith turns into a violet red mist before disappearing away from the lobby.]

[Adam comes over to talk to Lute with uncertainty.]

Adam: This next part is going to be scary. You ready?

Lute: I'm ready, [She hugs Adam] cause you'll be right next to me!

[Adam looks reluctant, hoping she does not mean 'physically being back in heaven'.]

Adam: You mean...only...In spirit, right?

Lute: Nope. In Heaven!

Adam: Yaaay!

[Adam's face winces at the thought of going back into Heaven and tells that it was not going to be a very good thing, especially when his face saids, "Shit...".]

[A little while later. Papermint finally returns to the Hotel.]

Adam: Where have you been?

Papermint: Wha-?!

[Adam dramatically spins around in his chair and glares at Papermint.]

Papermint: I was busy...

Adam: And with what? Exactly?

Papermint: With uhm...

Adam: Vox told me a theory. Right Vox?

Vox: Yes. And old friend. You need to leave.

Papermint: What? Vox! You can't mean that...

Vox: No. I mean it. You never were interested in redemption in the first place, were you?

Papermint: Well. Maybe...But Katie doesn't wanna be redeemed either. She just wants the free room. Or Tom too, he-

Vox: Most likely theory i have, because of you, danger was at the doorstep of the Hotel. And i had to clean it up.

Papermint: It was a minor inconvenience..

[Vox casually pushes Papermint towards the door.]

Vox: You are welcome to come back here, but only, if you actually want to give redemption a shot, but until then, you need to leave. Go back to whoever you work for. Which, i know who.

Papermint: Oh, and who?

Vox: Alastor, or Rosie, or Mimzy.

Papermint: Maybe...but. You know what? Fine! I'll leave.

[Insulted and offended, Papermint turns around walks away.]

[Chapter ends here.]

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins with Lute and Adam in their room. Lute is packing clothes into a suitcase while Adam sits on the bed, looking troubled because Lute is overpacking a lot of things to the point she has a closet-sized suitcase, a guitar case, two extra large suitcase luggage, and a small handbag.]

Lute: Ok, I have my warm weather clothes and my cold weather clothes. I have a light jacket, flak jacket and rain jacket, extra large raincoat, extra-extra-extra-EXTRA big furcoat!

Adam: Lute, you're only going to heaven for a few hours.

[Lute stands up and paces a bit.]

Lute: Adam, WE are going to heaven for a day. And I just want to be prepared! It's our last chance to convince heaven a soul can be redeemed.

Adam: Yeah, I wish I could come, sweetie, but I have that…thing.

Lute: What thing?

Adam: The thing with the.. thing uhm...It's my time of the month, and... Ugh! Fuuuuck, gah, I'm such a bad liar. Wish i could use the period excuse if i was a woman.

[Lute takes Adam's hand.]

Lute: Adam, i know you're scared or don't wanna go back...But you're my partner, I need you there with me.

Adam: [He sighs.] Fine. I'll go back to Heaven with you.

Lute: Yes!!! [She hugs and kisses Adam's cheek.] Gah. I love you so much!

[Scene change to the main hotel room, as Katie madly and exhausted stumbles into the lounge with exhaustion.]

Katie Killjoy: Oh, fuck.

[Vaggie pokes her head out of a plant pot with a feather duster before coming down to see him.]

Vaggie: Woah. You look messy! What happened to you?

Katie Killjoy: It's not WHAT happened to me. It's WHO happened to me, and the answer is everyone! Twice. Rosie had me working 16 hours straight on a fucking whim. The absolute dickbag. UGH! [She pulls her hands back to straighten her backside with crackles of bone being popped. She collapses on the couch to rest or sleep for the night.] Ugh!

Vaggie: Rest well! [She quickly puts a blanket onto Katie.]

Katie Killjoy: [Pats Vaggie on the head.] Thanks Vags...

[Lute and Adam come into the room with Adam holding two luggage suitcase with all of a sudden, the wall explodes, freaking Katie out of the couch. Katie gets annoyed that it's the second or third time the same wall that was fixed was blown up again.]

Katie Killjoy: Argh! What the fuck is with that wall?! We have a perfect door to use! Fuck!

[An outline appears from the pink smoke in the now-destroyed hole on the wall, holding a bomb in his hands.]

Angel Dust: Whats up, bitches?! [He laughs]

[Katie hears the laughter and immediately gets up from the couch with excitement.]

Katie Killjoy: Holy shit! Angel Dust?! Long time no see, baby!

[Angel jumps into the room.]

Angel Dust: Katie. You little bitch! You've been texting me depressin' shit all day! Figured we could tear shit up like old times. It's been fucking forever! [Angel senses Lute coming up behind him and gives the bomb to Lute.] Here, hold this.

[Lute freaks out and plays hot potato with the bomb.]

Lute: Ah! Oh my god! Oh my god!

[Lute tosses the bomb back and forth in her hands until Adam takes it.]

Adam: Nope, gimme that.

[Adam throws the bomb out of the oh-so broken wall and said bomb explodes 'safely'.]

Katie Killjoy: I love seeing you Angel, but I'm too tired. I need to pass out.

[Katie tries falling back down onto the couch, but Angel catches and pulls her up.]

Angel Dust: Oho, you can sleep when you're double dead, fuckhead! Come on, what you really need is a recharge! A reinvigoration, a re-

Lute: Responsible night on the town! That is a great idea! Hi! [She shakes Angel's hands.] Lute! That's my wall that you just blew up. It's so nice to meet one of Angel's friends! Aagh! He never brings anyone around.

Angel Dust: *snorts* Wonder why.

Lute: [obliviously] Yeah, me too. I wonder too. Anyway, Katie, and everyone else have been working so hard, I think they deserve to have a little fun.

Angel Dust: W-w-wait, they?

[Lute waves over to Tom and Vaggie. Tom doesn't seem to care much, but Vaggie is shaking so fast that shaking rattling sounds can be heard from her body.]

Lute: Yeah! Hi, everyone! Katie and her darling little friend here, are taking you all out for a night of fun and relaxation!

[Angel mistakes Lute's suggestion and tries to make her understand.]

Angel Dust: Wait, I'm only here for Kat- [Lute hands him a large stack of money.] -Ooh! Never mind, Let's fucking Go!

Lute: Make sure they have the best time tonight! Anyway, the portal to Heaven should be opening right about… [Just as Lute predicted, the portal to Heaven opens in the middle of the lounge. As she Screams with delight] Now!

[Lute grabs Adam with both arms and throws him into the portal, and as she steps a foot inside, she turns back to the guests and workers with Angel, waving them goodbye for the day.]

Lute: Bye guys and gays!!

[Lute enters the portal and vanishes on the spot just before Husk walks by with a drink in his mouth. He notices Angel and spits out his drink in shock]

Husk: Well! If it isn't my arch-nemesis! Have you come to meet your fate in battle,

[Husk doesn't notice one of Lute's discarded luggage in his way and ends up tripping over while Angel doesn't seem to mind about him.]

Angel Dust: Apparently, I'm going out with Katie and I gotta drag your sorry asses along.

[Angel takes out a piece of gum and starts chewing. Husk hears him well, and is flustered by Angel's suggestion. He immediately goes over to him and seemed nervous while Angel faces him and blows a bubble.]

Husk: Oh, oh, you and me are going out like for fun? I… I didn't think this would ever happen. [panicked] What-What do I do? What-What do I wear?

[Husk grabs Angel's shoulder for suggestion, but he doesn't like Husk touching him and grabs his claw to the point it seemed like he's crushing it.]

Angel Dust: Don't fuckin' touch me, ya' pussycat.

[And with that, Angel leaves behind the flustering Husk who is blushing red after Angel touched his hand.]

Husk: Oh my goodness...He touched my hand...Never washing it again.

[The scene cuts in front of the golden gates of Heaven where Lute and Adam are shown to be outside as the portal closes behind them.]

Lute: Adam. Just look at this place! It's just as clean as i remembered! Isn't that amazing?

Adam: [sarcastically] Yup, super cool. Heaven. Wow. Super good to be back here.

[Lute and Adam approach the front desk where St. Peter pops up from behind his desk.]

St. Peter: Hiya! Welcome to Heaven! Can I get your name, please?

Lute: Oh! Uhhh, uh, uh, fuuu...It's Luella...And well...Technically... my family name's Morningstar!

[Peter opens the book of reservations that are supposed to be a list of names they've cataloging for those who are to enter heaven.]

St. Peter: Luella Morningstar, hmm, [mumbling names from list] I'm not seeing you on my list here, that's so odd.

Lute: Uh, um, my mom got me this meeting, so maybe...

St. Peter: [in background] Oh, mom? Okay! How unusual.

Lute: Try Lilith... Morning... star?

[Peter realizes who Lilith is.]

St. Peter: Oh, fuck! [Extremely nervously.] Yeah, hoooo, hehehe. Yikes, am I right? Are you sure you're in the right place? Because I think you might be a little lost.

[Peter nervously flies down from the desk to Lute and Adam. Adam is unamused of St. Peter, crossing his arms in disappointment.]

Adam: Oh, here we go.

Lute: No, uh… we're, we're here for a meeting.

[Just then, high above the three of them, Carmilla & her daughters suddenly appear in their angelic forms before turning into their humanoid forms as they land in front of Adam & Lute.]

Carmilla: St. Peter. We can take it from here. Greetings, step-daughter of the Queen of Hell. I am Carmilla Carmine, the high seraphim of heaven. You are gifted to be here.

[Clara comes forward to greet them.]

Clara: Hi! I'm Clara, this is my sister, Odette, we're the younger seraphims, you can call me...Well, whatever you want, I go by whatever. Haha.

Odette: Im not. Call me by my name. Got it?

Clara: [She giggles happily.] Welcome to Heaven!

Odette: Clara. They've been here. They're fallen.

Clara: Then i wanna give them a warm welcome back.

[Peter flies overhead to get the gates open and starts to sing as "Welcome to Heaven" begins. The gates open to reveal to Lute and the unamused Adam the world of Heaven, a beautiful, clean paradise that is the complete opposite of Hell. Even the angels look completely different than the demons.]

St. Peter: Dearly beloved, it is my pleasure to say onto thee...♫ Welcome to Heaven, oh oh! Where the virtuous reside, 24/7, oh oh! People are happy that they died, 'cause here we got no worries, got no burglaries, no strife. It's the perfect afterlife! Welcome to Heaven, oh oh!♫ [St. Peter flies amongst many advertisements in Heaven.] ♫Check out our sick decor! The spirits leaven, oh! Please keep your brimstone off the floor, we've got the best and brightest, the politest of the lot.♫ [St. Peter flies and poses into a male angels arms, surrounded by many other angels.]♫And ev-ery-one is hooot!~♫

Clara: ♫Gosh, I'm so pleased to show some outsiders around. After you see our realm, you'll never wanna go back down!♫

Carmilla: ♫ Of course it is just temporary, I'm sorry you can't stay forever. ♫

[Clara and St. Peter grab hands and fly up together, before falling back down and posing with some other angels.]

St. Peter and Clara: ♫'Cause every single day in Heaven is a happy day! Welcome to Heaven!♫

St. Peter: ♫Yeah!♫ [He pants after finishing the song]

[Lute, Adam and Clara run hurriedly, unexpectedly passing Pentious, who is drinking a soda, and Cherri. They both immediately pause as they see Adan and Lute.]

Sir Pentious: Holy fuck, am I seeing who I think I'm seeing?

Cherri Bomb: What the fuck they doing here? How did they even get back up here?

Sir Pentious: Who cares? I'm handling this shit right now. [He goes to challenge Adam & Lute, but Cherri stops him.]

Cherri Bomb: Wait! Do you really wanna start a fight on the promenade in front of everyone?

Sir Pentious: Better than waiting for the fucking extermination!

[Cherri immediately grabs Pentious by his collar and pulls him to shush him harshly.]

Cherri Bomb: SHHH. Pentious, what was the Seraphim's one rule?

Sir Pentious: Uuughhh, "No one but the exorcists can know about the exterminations". I know, fine. [He slurps his drink.] Don't fucking shush me, bitch.

[Just before they can settle this, Carmilla suddenly appears behind them both, teleporting them to an office-like building with just one sway of her wings. The light goes white on the screen before reappearing to show Pentious and Cherri being confronted by a stern Carmilla.]

Carmilla: You should listen to your lieutenant, Pentious.

[Pentious turns around and looks at Carmilla with shock.]

Sir Pentious: Fuck! Carmilla! You can't sneak up on a guy like that, jeez.

Cherri Bomb: Your highness, forgive me, but what are the hell-spawn doing here?

Carmilla: Well, you failed to control the demons' unrest, and now Lilith is involved, setting up an audience for her misguided daughter. I never would have agreed to your...[Pentious slurps his soda drink.] 'yearly activities' if I thought it would bring trouble to our doorstep. Keeping Heaven safe was my only reason for allowing it.

Sir Pentious: What do you want from me? I'm just one guy.

Carmilla: I want you to do whatever you need to do to keep this problem from getting any worse. Are we clear?

Sir Pentious: [He sighs] Yeah. Got it.

[Adam and Lute are shown in their hotel room, Adam putting their big tons of luggage down as Lute sits on the bed excitedly.]

Lute: Okay, I love Heaven again! Did you see the ice cream shop? They had sprinkles made of rainbows!

Adam: Those are just rainbow sprinkles.

Lute: [She stands up excitedly.] Clara's taking me to a zoo where all the animals are actually soft! You coming?

Adam: Uh, I need a break from all of this. But hug a koala for me.

Lute: O.M.G! Can you imagine an actual koala? [She squeals happily.] See you later babe!

[Lute zips right out of the door, leaving Adam alone for himself. He lays on the bed and sighs, but there is a knock on the door a second later. He answers it, revealing Pentious, barging right in to greet her.]

Sir Pentious: Hey there, first man!

Adam: Lute will be back soon, you need to get out, now.

[Pentious enters the room, Cherri behind him]

Sir Pentious: I'm not looking for the girl bitch. I'm looking for you.

Adma: Why?

Sir Pentious: Well maybe cus you left your own band. You tried for a solo career, or I guess it's more of a... duet.

Adam: I do not know what you're talking about.

Sir Pentious: Do you really think I don't know that it was you who led the exterminations before me? I recognize an exorcist even when they are out of their uniform.

[Adam immediately grows pale when he realizes how Pentious recognizs him.]

Sir Pentious: You were a real life madman! A bastard, and a great fighter, I wouldn't mind a bad bitch like you on my team. Especially someone experienced with sssex.

[Cut to a flashback of the Extermination a few years ago. Adam is inn a courtroom.]

Adam: Oh come on, Carmilla. They don't deserve to be killed! Why do we have to do this! All of this is wrong. Sinful even.

Carmilla: Do not ever say that word again.

Adam: Why not? What you allowed is wrong! Treating MY descendants like shit? They might be sinners. But they don't deserve death! And you know that too!

Carmilla: [She turns away from Adam.] Send him down.

Adam: What?-

[Then cut change to down in Hell, when Adam falls down to the ground. He stumbles down an alleyway, bleeding from his back.]

Adam: Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. FUCK! [He collapses against a dumpster.] So this is how i'll die again? [He closes his eyes when-]

Lute: Oh my goodness. [She appears and spots him. She takes a look at Adam and notices his bleeding back. And sh puts some bandage on him. Which causes Adam to smile at her. In return, Lute smiles back.]

[Cut back to the present days.]

Sir Pentious: To think someone as worthless as you landed Lilith's little hottie. 'Grats on that I guess. Tho you're MUCH older than her.

[Cherri looks disgusted of their relationship.]

Cherri Bomb: Their love is vile and disgusting.

Sir Pentious: Hot assss fuck though. But I wonder what your bitch would think if she found out you are actually one of usss, hmmm?

Adam: She already knows it.

Sir Pentious: Figured that out. But does she know that you used to LEAD the exoricst army before me?

Adam: What. Do. You. Want?

Sir Pentious: Ah well. It's quite simple, you will ssstart working for me from now on. And at the hearing, you're gonna help me shut thissss kindergarten snowflake bullshit down for good.

Adam: Never!

Sir Pentious: Oh yeah, you know, that's totally cool. I guess I'll just tell little missss butterflies and rainbows that she's been letting a guy that has killed-thousands of the people she's trying to save, inside of her. I'm sure your relationship will be fine. See you later in court!

[Pentious and Cherri leaves the room, Cherri smirks at the scared Adam.]

[The scene transitions to an angelic courtroom, where Adam and Lute are sat down. Pentious walks by on his way to his seat with Cherri.]

Lute: Oh no, not him again!

[Pentious flies up and sits down beside Cherri.]

Sir Pentious: What up, baby? Saw that you went to my manager. Low blow, Karen.

Carmilla: We are gathered here today to determine whether or not a soul in Hell can, or can't be redeemed into the heavenly realm via means of this "Hazbin Hotel". Princess Lute?

Lute: [She sigh.] Thank you, Seraphim. [She clears her throat.] Webster's dictionary defines redemption as-

Sir Pentious: Objection, lame and unoriginal.

Carmilla: Sustained. No further dictionary references please.

Lute: Right, ok, uh, uh… uhhmmmm... [She shuffles through multiple cards, all which have various dictionary references on.]

Sir Pentious: If you have any actual evidence, then show it already.

Lute: We have a patron right now who is making incredible progress!

Sir Pentious: Who?

Lute: Katie Killjoy.

Sir Pentious: Oh yeah, the porn demon. She's totally worth being redeemed. [He blows raspberry at Lute.]

Lute: Well, first off, she's not a "porn" demon. And two, if you know so much, what do you think it takes to get into Heaven?

Sir Pentious: Uhmm… w-w-well… Uhh…

Odette: Is everything ok?

Sir Pentious: Give me a fucking minute, ok? [He mutters something and scrawls something down on a golden piece of paper, before teleporting it over to Adam.]

Adam: [reads the list.] "Act selfless, don't steal, stick it to the man". Are you fucking kidding me?

Sir Pentious: Uh, yeah. Sure got me here, didn't it? Isn't that right?

Odette: He was the first soul to be let into Heaven, even after everything he did as a human.

Lute: Well, I bet Katie is doing all of those things right now!

Sir Pentious: Then let's fucking see it bruh! [He snaps his fingers.]

[A spying orb appears in the middle of the courtroom.]

Lute: Your honor, may I present: exhibit A.

[Scene transitions to the nightclub Katie and co. are at]

Angel Dust: Woo! Isn't this place the fucking best?

Tom Trench: I'll admit, "Consent" is a good name for a sex club.

Husk: Vaggie, dear, what are you doing?

Vaggie: Ugh. I'm sweeping! Urgh, look how dirty the floor is in here!

Husk: That's because we're at a club.

Vaggie: Oooooh! I thought the hotel looked different! [She giggles]

[Husk leans over to Angel Dust.]

Husk: Hey, Dust. I-I-I'd like to buy you a drink.

Angel Dust: [smugly] What? Didn't you say we're arch-rivals?

Husk: Um… uhh… because I'm buying EVERYONE a drink!

Crowd: Free drinks! Awesome. I love alcohol!

Katie Killjoy: Good, I need a drink after today. You know, Rosie, she's into this waterboarding shit now, I don't know, it's a kink.

Angel Dust: Katie, enough with the Rosie shit talk. She already ruined your whole day, don't let her ruin your night too. [He holds out three pills.] Here, take one of these and you won't be worrying about nothing.

Tom Trench: Oh Here we go.

Angel Dust: Oh look! The drunk sobered up long enough to judge us.

Tom Trench: I ain't the one trying to get into Heaven. Look, if you want to fuck up all your progress. Then be my guest. I just… [He sighs] I just thought you were better than that.

Angel Dust: Thanks, Captain Buzzkill. Come on, Katie, let's get fucked up! It's been too long.

Katie Killjoy: I uhh… I don't know, it's been a long night and I don't need to go too wild.

Angel Dust: Oh, come on, ya' bitch. If you've really been working that hard, you deserve a little R and R, some THC, or maybe PCP with DMT. Aw, fuck it, let's see where the night takes us, huh?

[Husk walks back into frame holding shots.]

Katie Killjoy: I uh...I guess?

Husk: Angel, I bought you a shot. B-because I bought everyone another shot! Hooray! [He chuckles]

Crowd: Yeah! Another drink! I love alcohol!

Katie Killjoy: [She drinks a shot.] ah… Fuck it, let's do it.

[Transitions back to the courtroom.]

Sir Pentious: Heavenly people, what more do you need to see? The porn star chose a night of debauchery. That's not a soul worthy of being in Heaven!

Lute: Uhm, objection! Are you really telling me you've never had a drink with friends at the end of a hard day?

Sir Pentious: Uh, we don't have hard days? It's Heaven, bitch. You seriously gonna sit there and pretend like this behavior is ok? [He tutrns to Adam, with malicious intent.] What do you think?

Adam: I-I- I have to go the bathroom! [He rushes out of the courtroom.]

Lute: What? Adam. [She groans frustrated.] Look. Katie will make good decisions, come on! We have to keep watching! Please?

Carmilla: [She sighs] Yeah, I don't know.

Clara: Yeah. Let's give her another chance.

Carmilla: Very well, the court will allow it.

Lute: Fuck yes! I mean… heh… thank you.

[Transitions back to the club, where the gang have had multiple drinks. Angel walks into frame with 5 shots]

Angel Dust: Round 12, motherfuckers! Heels are coming off! [He sets the shots down on the table and hands them out to Tom, Katie and Husk]

Katie Killjoy: Ho ho yeah! Keep 'em comin'! Come on, right here! Come right here to mommy.

Husk: Oh, it's wonderful to have friends! [He chuckles]

[Vaggie reaches across the table trying to reach her shot glass.]

Vaggie: Everything's so spinny! [She giggles]

Katie Killjoy: Ha, I think you're done, tiny.

Vaggie: No! Gimme gimme gimme!

Angel Dust: Oh come on, bitch! She can handle a little more!

Katie Killjoy: She's like 10 pounds soaking wet and- oh shit, where'd she go?

[Vaggie is shoving other patrons' drinks into a sack.]

Guys at a table: Hey! Fuck!

Vaggie: Dirty, dirty! Make it CLEAN!

Katie Killjoy: Damn it, Vaggie. Sorry fellas, here, next one's on me. [She hands the demons money.] Vaggie? Shit!

[Vaggie's digging through a supply closet.]

Vaggie: Chlorine…! Bleach…!

Angel Dust: Katie. What the fuck you doin'? You're supposed to be relaxin', not playin' nanny!

Katie Killjoy: Look, she ain't used to this scene, I-I just don't want her to end up in the gutter like I used to.

Angel Dust: Pfft, whatever, nerd, just catch up when you're done.

[Vaggie laughs as Katie picks her up.]

Katie Killjoy: STOP!! You can't take tha- GOD, Vags, why you bein' such a mess?!

Vaggie: I'm... the mess? [She starts crying.]

Katie Killjoy: Oh, oh shit! Hey hey, Hey calm down. [She takes deep breaths] You aren't a mess, it's all fine..! Shh.. Hey, you wanna play with the masked man?

Vaggie: [stops crying] yeah...

[Katie puts Vaggie on Tom's head while she giggles about it.]

Tom Trench: The fuck is this?

Katie Killjoy: She's wasted, just go with it.

Tom Trench: Re-Really? [He sees Vaggie playing with his ears and mask] Ugh, get the...

[Scene changes to Husk falling off his seat and walking over to Angel at another table.]

Husk: Ahh... HEY, wow!!!! Hey, so… I see the club has a sex room, so I was thinking, maybe you'd want to, uhm… do a… SEX with me?

Angel Dust: [He snorts] I'm sorry, why would we have sex?

Husk: Uh… Uh…uhm… because I'm having sex with everyone here! [He laughs briefly before being grabbed]

[Crowd cheers, before dragging Husk towards the 'sex room'. Many sets of eyes are visible inside]

Husk: Wait! [He screams.]

Katie Killjoy: Atleast he didn't say no.

Angel Dust: You know, we can do this fucking shit every fuckin' night! You don't have to spend all your off hours "working on yourself", you little bitch.

Tom Trench: The hotel isn't her problem in her life, it's-

Katie Killjoy: Rosie.

Tom Trench: Exactly. So why don't you-

Katie Killjoy: No. Rosie.

[Camera pan over to Rosie at a large sofa-bench talking with some female demons]

Rosie: Yeah, I come here all the time, they know me. You're gorgeous, do you need a job? Ooh, I could make you a star.

Katie Killjoy: Let's get the fuck outta here, okay? Come on. Wait...Where's Vaggie?

Rosie: OK, yup, bring me another drink or I'll fucking kill you.

[Vaggie is running towards Rosie]

Vaggie: A Baddie!

Rosie: I said I'll fucking kill you, and I will.

Katie Killjoy: Excuse me. Pardon me. Get out of my way.

[Katie tumbles onto the platform and grabs Vaggie, who is still running in midair as Katie holds her.]

Katie Killjoy: We're going home-

Rosie: Holy shit, Katie Killjoy? What are you doing here, baby? You didn't get enough dick today?

Katie Killjoy: Funny.

Rosie: Oh. And who's this darling right here? You bringing me fresh meat? [Vaggie attempts to bite Rosie's finger and this causes her to yelp.] Oi!

Vaggie: I just want a taste.

Rosie: Ehh, weird, but there's a kink for that, I'm sure!

[Katie stands up, still holding Vaggie.]

Angel Dust: Fuck off, Rosie.

Rosie: Excuse me?

Katie Killjoy: I said fuck off! I may have to put up with your bullshit, but you ain't fuckin' with any of my friends!

[Rosie summons her pink smoke chain and grabs Katie with it, pulling her close.]

Rosie: Did you forget who you're talking to? I own you, bitch.

Katie Killjoy: Yeah, you do, but only in the studio. And you can do anything you want to me there, just like our deal says. But out here. Out here? I get to do whatever the fuck i want to do. So once again, FUCK. OFF.

[Rosie smacks Katie, sending her tumbling to the side onto the ground. As Katie coughs and splutters blood from her mouth, Rosie walks over.]

Rosie: Enjoy the rest of your night, bitch, because I'm going to enjoy making you pay for it tomorrow.

Angel Dust: Fuckin' dickhead...

[Katie stands up and walks back to her friends while wiping blood from her mouth.]

Angel Dust: Fuck it. It was worth it.

[Tom smiles and puts a hand on Katie's back as they walk off.]

Tom Trench: Way to go, kid.

[Vaggie appears tearing out a part of Rosie's hair (painful).]

Rosie: Ow! What the fuck?!?

Vaggie: [She chuckles] For my collection! [More chuckling] Wait for me guys!

Angel Dust: Did you just call these cunts your friends? Thought that was my job.

Katie Killjoy: There's room for everyone, and you know… you could come crash with us too.

Angel Dust: Okay, look, Katie, I'm glad this hotel shit is workin' for you, but you know me, bitch, I'm doin' just fine! In fact, I'm gonna fuck the next guy I see, okay? But if you need me, you know where to find me, yeah?

Husk: [panting] Is Angel still here? [Angel walks into the sex room with another demon.] Dammit!

[Scene transitions back to the angelic courtroom.]

Lute: See? She did everything on your checklist! She was selfless, she stopped Vaggie from stealing and he stuck it to that cannibal woman!

Sir Pentious: Uhhh… well, uh… Then, then why isn't she up here then? Hm?

Clara: Yeah, why isn't she here?

[The angels observing the court all murmur together.]

Lute: Wait... none of you know what actually gets someone into Heaven?

Carmilla: [abruptly] This questioning stops now. We know when a soul arrives, we know when they pass divine judgment, it is our job to ensure that these souls are safe. No matter the cost.

[Clara conjures Pentious's list and looks over it. Three things on the list are crossed out. And Clara begins singing.]

Clara: ♫But she was right, mother. She showed us a soul can improve♫ [She flies up and shows the orb with the scene of Katie defying Rosie.] ♫She saw the light, mother. Checked all the boxes that you said would. [She flies with the orb and asks the other angels observing the court.] ♫Prove a person deserves a second chance. Now we turn our backs, without a second glance?♫

Carmilla: ♫It's not that simple, you should know♫ [Clara flies back up to Carmilla, who takes her hands.] ♫Not everything is spelled in ink.♫

[Scene pans down to Lute staring defiantly with Adam in the background.]

Lute: ♫It's not fair, Carmilla♫

[Adam steps forward and puts a hand on Lute's shoulder.]

Adam: ♫Careful, Lute, keep a cool head...♫

[Lute pulls away and looks at Carmilla.]

Lute: ♫No! Don't you care, Carmilla? That just because someone is dead. It doesn't mean they can't resolve to change their ways ♫ [The orb shows multiple images of Katie and the others.] Turn the page. To escape the eternal flames!♫

Carmilla: ♫I 'm sure you wish it could be so. But there's a lot that you don't know♫

[Pan over to Cherri Pentious's seat abruptly.]

Cherri Bomb: ♫What are we even talkin' about? Some cracked up-whore who fucked up already? She blew het shot, like the cocks in her mouth♫ [She stands up and puts her Exorcist mask on.] ♫This discussion is senseless and petty♫

[Both Pentious and Cherri fly up in front of Lute, before flying over to and landing on the orb.]

Pentious and Cherri: ♫There's no question to be posed. She's unholy, case closed. Did you forget that "Hell is forever"?♫

Sir Pentious: ♫ A guy only lives once. We'll see you in one month♫ [He flies off of the orb and gets closer to Lute.] ♫Gotta say, I can't wait to-♫

Carmilla: Pentious.

Sir Pentious: ♫Come down and exterminate you!♫

Clara: Wait!

Sir Pentious: Fuck!

Clara: ♫ What are you saying?. Let me get this straight ♫ [She flies down and lands in front of the orb, which now displays an silhouette of an exorcist standing among frames, staring sadly.] You go down there and kill those poor souls?♫

Clara: ♫You didn't know?♫

Sir Pentious: Whoops!

Cherri Bomb: ♫ Guess the cat's out of the bag... ♫

Sir Pentious: ♫What's the big deal?♫

[Clara looks back up at Carmilla.]

Clara: ♫ Mother, tell me that you didn't know ♫

Carmilla: ♫I thought, since I'm older. This burden should be on my shoulder♫

Clara: No!

[Carmilla flies down to Clara.]

Carmilla: ♫ You have to listen. It was a very hard decision. I wanted to save you, the anguish it takes to-♫ [She takes Clara hand and forces a smile, the fire from the orb reflecting in her eyes.] ♫Do what was required.♫

Clara: ♫ To think that I admired you ♫ [She tugs out of her mother's grip and flies upwards.] ♫Well, I don't need your condescension. I'm not a child to protect.♫ [She turns in the air and questions Carmilla directly.] ♫Were your talks of virtue, just pretension? Was I just naïve to expect you...[She lands in front of the orb next to Lute.] To heed the morals you're purveying?♫

Lute: ♫ And that's what I've been saying!♫

[Both Lute and Clara fly onto the orb as the camera spins.]

Lute & Clara: ♫ If Hell is forever, then Heaven must be a lie!

Carmilla: Clara!

Lute & Clara: ♫ If angels can do whatever, and remain in the sky♫ [The two fly off the orb and move out of the way, showing an Exorcist murdering a demon.] ♫The rules are shades of gray when you don't do as you say. When you make the wretched suffer just to kill them again♫

[The members of the court are shown to be horrified.]

Lute: ♫I was always told never to trust angels again...♫

[Pentious walks nearer to Adam.]

Pentious: ♫By him?♫

[Cherri leans on Adam's shoulder.]

Cherri: ♫ Ha! She should know ♫

[Adan walks over to Lute, who takes his hands.]

Adam: ♫We should go!♫

Lute: ♫No! Don't you see? We've come so close♫

[Cut to an above view, showing the angels all talking together and Clara refusing to listen to Carmilla.]

Lute: ♫Look at them fighting; they're at each other's throats.♫

Pentious: ♫ Don't you act all high and mighty. Did you ever think your little boyfriend might be a liar? ♫

[Pentious walks through the gap between Lute and Adam and approaches the orb.]

Adam: ♫ Don't, Pentious, please! ♫

Pentious: ♫ What's the fuss? Why hide the fact that you used to lead this same army!♫ [He sinisterly turns while Cherri grabs Adam and pulls him over to them.] ♫Just like me?♫

[The orb shows Adam in the past when he used to lead the exorcists, a shadow falling over the darkened courtroom as he spreads his wings.]

[And with that, the song ends.]

[Lute falls to her knees in disbelief as Adam runs to her and Clara settles back by Carmilla.]

Carmilla: [She Inhales to keep her composure.] I'm sorry... but this court finds that there is no evidence that a soul in Hell can be redeemed.

Sir Pentious: Oh, FUCK, YES!! I WIN!!! SUCK IT BITCHES. You better save the date cunts, 'cause we're coming to your hotel FIRST. [He snaps his fingers, re-opening the portal to Hell.]

Lute: What... NO!! NO!! You can't-

Adam: You... Motherfu-

[The twoe scream as they are transported back to Hell through the portal.]

Clara: Lute! Don't give up on this! I'll figure something out, I promise!

Carmilla: That was uncalled for, Pentious.

Sir Pentious: Yeah, But did you see the looks on their fucking faces, it was.... d-d- [He stammers] Sorry....

[The court, Pentious and Cherri fly away.]

Clara: Extermination...of human souls!? Demon or not there is NO reason to be doing this!

Carmilla: They were uprising, Clara! It is my position as the head Seraphim to protect our people at all costs. And it's your position to keep them happy and joyful.

[Carmilla leans forward, putting her hands on Clara's shoulders.]

Clara: And tell me. How am I supposed to bring joy when I now know we are bringing misery to thousands of innocent people?

Carmilla: Heaven needs us, Clara. Everyone looks to us... and we can't doubt ourselves or worry about the fates of demons when we have our own souls to protect. Please.... if you start to question... you could end up like them: Fallen. I couldn't bear to see either you suffer that fate, so please, let me worry about this, ok? [She kisses Clara's forehead.] I'm sorry. [She walks away.]

[Saddened, Clara puts a hand on Pentious's list gently.]

Clara: [Turns to Odette.] And did you know about it?

Odette: Only a litlle. I didn't know about all of it. Only that they go down to Hell, not that they kill anyone.

[Chapter ends.]

Chapter Text

[The chapter begins with Adam, Vaggie, Vox, Tom, Husk and Katie all sitting in the hotel's lounge.]

Vaggie: So, like where are your wings?

Adam: Vaggie, I don't have then anymore, i-

Katie Killjoy: Did you ever think maybe he's sensitive about his lack of wings, just like his lack of a dick size?

Vaggie: Yeah. I bet his is small.

Adam: [He sighs] Any other questions?

Tom Trench: I got one. How come every time Lute, or any one of us talks to Heaven we get in deeper and deeper shit?

Adam: It's not her fault. And it's certainly not ours. Angels are just-

Tom Trench: Liars?

Adam: ...Difficult. But Lute's trying her best.

Katie Killjoy: Yeah, well, her best is turning out real well so far. And anyways, where is miss fearless leader anyways? Isn't it about time for another "doomed-to-fail" plan of hers?

Adam: She's upstairs. Coming up with something, I'm sure, in our room. Alone.

Vox: Hmm.

[Vox vanishes into electricity. Now a scene change to Lute and Adam's bedroom, as Lute in her bed under her covers softly crying. While Razzle and Dazzle comfort her with tissues. Vox reappears in her room and approaches her bedside.]

Vox: Oh, Lute, you look an absolute mess.

Lute: Ugh, go away, Vox. I don't wanna talk right now.

[Vox sits down on her bed while Lute hides again under the covers]

Vox: Now, now is that any way to act after picking a fight with all of Heaven and dooming everyone you love?

[Lute emerges from the covers]

Lute: I have enough on my mind without hearing your sadistic idea of a joke, you dumb asshole.

[Lute wraps herself under the covers again, only for Vox to appear laying beside her.]

Vox: Who's joking?

[Lute, scared, jumps and falls off of the bed.]

Vox: You have a captive audience downstairs waiting to hear what kind of inspiring performance you have planned next.

Lute: Ugh, I can't. How can I face them after failing them all so hard? [Vox repositions himself on his stomach and begins kicking his legs in the air while Lute speaks.] They came here to be saved and all I gave them was more pain. [She starts tearing up.] I'm just as bad as the cruelest Overlord in Hell. And maybe worse. And worse than that, is the love of my life lied to me...Not fully, i already knew who he was before...I just wanted to hear him tell me. What i didn't know he used to LEAD the exorcist army...[Lute stands and paces back and forth.] But At least the overlords don't go around giving false hope to their people...

Vox: Well, I never expected to see such a miserable display of self-loathing from you. You're usually so secretive towards everyone.

Lute: Oh, fuck you, Vox. [Vox adjusts himself, now laying on his side] All you do is stand there, smiling while you watch us struggle and fail. I don't know how you can enjoy all this suffering so much.

[Vox stands up, wraps his fingers on Lute's shoulder while chuckling]

Vox: [He Chuckles.] Just because you see a smile don't think you know what's going on underneath. [He lets go of her shoulder, but he grabs Lute's face with his hand and makes her smile.] A smile is a valuable tool, my dear. It inspires your friends, keeps your enemies guessing, and ensures that no matter what comes your way, you're the one in control.

Lute: But I'm not. [She starts walking towards her bedroom window] I'm the farthest thing from being in control. The person I trust most has been lying to me for years. Heaven refuses to listen me... [She thuds both fists against the window.] Even if they did, I can't prove the hotel works. And now, Pentious has an invincible exorcist Army pointed right at my doorstep and there's nothing I can do [she thuds the window.] about any of it!

[Sinister music plays again and Vox starts smiling.]

Vox:  [in a sing song tune] I know something you don't know.

Lute: Huh?

[Vox walks over and grabs Lute's arms.]

Vox: Those big, scary angels are not quite as indestructible as they seem. [He let's go of Lute and walks away.]

Lute: What are you talking about?

Vox: Just that you and your little band of misfits might stand more of a chance than you think. And you're proof of it.

Lute: [desperately] How? I'll do anything.

Vox: Anything? Then... let's make a deal.

Lute: You... You want my soul?

Vox: [sinisterly] Your soul? [brightly] Heavens, no. I don't need your soul. Do you even have one?

Lute: Yeah. Just cus i was never born as a human, doesn't mean i don't have one.

Vox: Suprising. Anywho. All I need from you is one itty-bitty favor. What's a favor between friends?

Lute: I am not going to hurt anyone for you.

Vox: Who's asking for that? One favor, at a time of my choosing, where you harm no one. In return, I tell you what I know. Do we have a deal?

[Razzle and Dazzle both growl as Lute puts her hands down to stop them.]

Lute: Fine...Deal.

[Both Lute and Vox shake hands resulting in a blue electric-like aura flash throughout the room.]

[The scene cuts to Adam, Angel, Husk, And Katie now in the hotel lobby as they observe the flash happen]

[Adam begins heading to his and Lute's room]

Adam: No. No! [He strains and slams the bedroom door open with his harpoon in hand.]

Vox: Right on cue!

Adam: What did you do? Let her go!

[Vox and Lute finish their handshake.]

Lute: Adam! Stop!

Adam: What? [He drops his harpoon.] No, Lute, please tell me you didn't-

Lute: I made a deal with Vox.

Adam: [in a pleading voice.] Lute...

Vox: Oh, calm down. She still owns her soul.

Lute: He gave me info that can save the hotel, but we're going to need help. The angels can be defeated, and Sera is the key.

Adam: What? Sera Seraph?

Lute: She killed an exorcist in the last extermination. She knows how they can be harmed in other ways

Adam: But... I- I didn't even know that was possible.

Lute: I thought me not having an arm for 2 years was enough proof for you...

Adam: Lute. I-

Lute: I need you to go to her, convince her to teach us. If she can, we might have a chance.

Adam: With just the seven of us?

Lute: No, we're- ugh, we're going to need numbers too.

[Vox reenters the conversation.]

Vox: And I know just who can help. As long as Lute can be her normal, charming self.

Lute: What's that you said about smiles?

Vox: [While he's patting Lute's head.] Good girl.

Adam: [He leans close to Lute and whispers to her.] Lute, can we talk about this-

Lute: We can talk later. Right now, we have a job to do. You with us?

Adam: [He sigh.] Ugh.

[Adam walks down the stairs, only to be met by a confused Katie.]

Katie Killjoy: So-ho, uh...Vox and Lute just left like they were runnin' away from their responsibilities. Should we be alarmed?

Adam: No. We have a plan, but it includes defending ourselves against the angels.

Tom Trench: Uh- are you fuckin' high?

Adam: They can be killed, not just harmed like me and Lute were, and-

Bark: Yeah! That eyes lady, Sir Ser, killed one.

Adam: Wait, you knew about this?

Bark: Uh, yeah. I told Boss about it months ago.

Adam: [He turns to Husk.] He what?

Husk: What? They say insane shit all the time! How was I supposed to know this one was true?

Kitten Boi: Baby cucumbers exist cus two cucumbers are inlove!

Husk: See what i mean?

Adam: [He sighs] What's important now is that we're going to have a fight on our hands. Look, this hotel is about to become the most dangerous place in hell, and we....I, can't guarantee your safety anymore. I still believe in Lute's hopes and dreams. I know this place can work. But none of you signed up for this [He slowly heads out the door.] I'm gonna go learn how we can fight back, and when I come home....Well I'll understand if none of you are here.

[With that, Adam heads out the door, everyone sighing in worry for what he said.]

Husk: Well...This is awkward.

Vaggie: 'Kay.

[Cut to Downtown. Vox escorts Lute down the streets as he listens to Lute.]

Lute: Three years! THREE YEARS I've been sharing my life with him, and I tell him EVERYTHING! My hopes, my dreams, my insecurities, my embarrassing habits, what i like to do secretly, and he kept something like this, from ME? Why would he lie for so long? Did he think I wouldn't accept him? What about me-me-says un-understanding? [She pauses] misunderstanding [she pauses again] dis-under, ugh! Wait wh- [She pauses for a moment, looking at their current location.] Where are we?

Vox: In the downtown. Where the porn section of the city is. That's the place my boyfriend has his workers live and work at. You should meet him.

Lute: In the porn studio? You mean we're downtown? But it's, it's...[She looks at surroundings.] surprisingly nice here.

Vox: Isn't it though? And it's all thanks to the very special someone.

[Vox opens the door for Lute as they enter the mainxstudio, where they meet the Porn Overlord himself at his desk speaking to a young woman at the front of a long line.]

Valentino: Well who hasn't thought about fucking their ex girlfriend again? I certainly would have done it if that bitch didn't go to Heaven. Hehe, I tell ya what, you bring your tall dark and armless ex to me, and I'll straighten him right out for ya'. Okay sweetie? [He gives the woman his card.] Now here's my card, give me call, a- [He notices Vox.] Oh, my, stars! Do my eyes deceive me? [He peeks through crowd.] Voxxy? [He makes his way through.] Vox! Where have you been? These halls really lost some of their sparkle without your lively presence and- [He notices Lute.] Oh. Who's this chiquita you brought with you? Come now, Voxy-poxy, she's much too young for you! [Lute rolls her eyes at him.] Oh I'm just kidding. Tho you're still just a bi in the closet baby.

Vox: Excuse-a-what-now?

Valentino: But where are your manners mister? Introduce us why don't you?

Vox: Ahh, yes. Lute, this is Valentino, the most darling, delightful and dangerous Overlord this side of the Pentagram! And my lover.

Valentino: Oh! Always such a charmer you are Voxy.

Vox: And Val, it's my pleasure to introduce you [He pushes Lute up to him.] To Luella.

Lute: Just. Lute. Anyways. How do you do? [She waves nervously.]

Valentino: Well well! isn't this a regal surprise! [He pushes her to his desk.] Come in! Come in! Can I offer you somethin' to eat? Oh, what am I thinkin'? [He pokes her stomach] Small thing like you? You're probably watchin' your figure!

Lute: Um...No. no, thank you, though. Im not hungry...

Valentino: [He puts the box away.] Oh look at you! [pats her head] So polite! Vox, you could learn a thing or two.

[Valentino then proceed to take Lute to a table with two chairs. He sits her down on one of them and he sits on the one across from her. Vox walks up to Val.]

Valentino: Well, sit down. Sit down. Tell Uncle Valentino what he can do for you. Ya know, Vox. I got a premo-connect on a guy with about eight blocks of territory and not enough goons to run it. Prime pickin's for a deal to be made, honey.

Vox: I Appreciate the offer, [He walks up to Lute] but we're here on business of another kind.

Valentino: well don't keep me in suspense! I'm a very busy man [He drinks cup of tea.]

Lute: Well, as you know...[panicking] the extermination is coming early. It'll be here in a month, and they're-they're coming for my hotel and my friends first, and I-I-I-I-

Vox: [interrupts] We need your help. Well, your workers help at least, to fend off the attack.

Valentino: Wow! [He puts down the cup.] When you ask a favor ya' don't start small, do ya'? Oh now, don't fret. [He gets up] I didn't say I wouldn't help. But I assume there's more to this plan then a bunch of unarmed porn workers.

Vox: Oh, your people will be far from helpless when we're done with them. And by the end, they will be able to eat, their, fill.

Valentino: Well, in that case, sure! Why not?

Lute: Really?

Valentino: What can I say? I like your moxie girl. And old Vox here has never done me wrong before.

Lute: Oooh! Thank you [holds her hands] thank you, thank you!

[Cut to Adam at Sera's house, as she bangs on the door.]

Adam: [Shouting] Open the door you bitch! We need to talk! [Adam walks up to the security camera and stares at it] I know what you did on extermination day. We can talk about it inside, or I can yell about it out here. [The door clanks open.] About time you open that fucking door. [The door slams shut.] Hello? Sera: [Her voice Echoing.] You have 2 minutes to convince me not to silence you for good.

[A spotlight is turned on revealing Sera]

Adam: Oh fuck! Oh. Miss, I'm here on appointment from my girlfriend to enlist your aid in the defense of hell from the angelic extermination. We know an angel fell at your hands and we need to know how.

Sera: No!

Adam: What do you mean, no? This is-

Sera: Means nothing to me. You have to do better than that. 90 seconds.

Adam: With your knowledge, we wouldn't have to helplessly stand by while-

Sera: Clearly I am not the helpless one here. 80 seconds.

Adam: Well, then why? Why wouldn't you use what you know to fight?

Sera: To avoid the very problem you and your little friends are facing right now. I will not invite destruction into my house, on my people.

Adam: You think we asked for this? All Lute has ever done is try to make things better to help her people who, news flash, include your people too.

Sera: And how exactly has that worked out for her? 45 seconds.

Adam: We didn't pick this fight, but it's here now. And they aren't going to stop with us. You didn't see the look on their leader's face. With us out of the way, it's only a matter of time before they come for the rest of you. They won't stop until all of hell is wiped out, so you can help us make a stand here together, or you can stand alone tomorrow. And what do you think your chances will be then?

Sera: You're out of time.

[Sera jumps down and kicks Adam in the face. Adam slides on the floor]

Sera: Angels attack quickly, viciously, and without mercy. You'll need to defend better than that.

[The scene cuts back to Downtown]

Valentino: [While speaking Through a megaphone.] Men, Women, anything inbetween, assemble in the square. [He walks with Lute to the stage] Now, darling, you know I would do anything, anything for my clients, but I can't exactly command all of Town to follow someone else into battle. Now, don't get me wrong, they love carnage and bloodshed, they have kinks, but to get this group into line, you got to win 'em over. [Through megaphone again] Settle in! Settle in! Important meeting.

[The workers form a crowd around the stage]

Lute: But how do I-

Valentino: With sparkle! Razzamatazz! and that oh so appealing moxie of yours.

Vox: Shouldn't be a problem. It's not like you've ever failed to inspire before.

[Lute groans as she walks on stage]

Valentino: Now, fair warning. A thing about porn workers, yeah, they stick together. So in order to convince any of them, you'll need to convince all of them. And there's one in particular-

Vox: Uuuugh, Travis.

Valentino: Travis, who's a bit of an... uh-

Vox: A pricky little bitch?

Valentino: That! He's tough, but win him over and the rest will be easy as pie. Ready?

Lute: I guess.

Valentino: [Through the megaphone] Everyone, we have a very special guest this evening! Please put your hands together for Lute.

[Lute smiles awkwardly and waves at the crowd]

Travis: Booooo, bring Valentino back!

Lute: Travis?

Val & Vox: Travis.

Lute: [Laughs nervously] Sorry. Uh, okay, uh, my name's Lute, and...

[Travis & Lute both speak at the same time]

Lute: Well, I run this hotel with my boyf.. well someone and...Wait, let me start over. Angels are coming to kill us all and we need help defending our realm. So- we, uh... we need your help- With your assistance, we can make a stand for-

Travis: [Yelling] Booooo! Get off the stage, you gold blooded bitch! Booo! We don't give a shit about some hotel! Leave before fuck your brains out! Boo! Get off! Where's the showmanship? Where's all the finesse? Fucking mediocre!

Lute: [flips Travis off.] FUCK YOU, YOU BASTARDLY BITCH!!!!!

[The crowd gasps]

Valentino: Okay! We'll be back after a brief intermission.

[Valentino moves Lute away from the stage]

[Cut back to Adam and Sera fighting. Adam is slammed onto a pillar but then starts charging at Sera. Sera kicks Adam onto the floor. Adam gets up and starts charging again. But again, Sera kicks him onto the floor. Adam gets up and just barley points his spear at her before being kicked onto the floor again]

Adam: Fuck! Ow!

[Adam gets up, only to be kicked yet again. He strikes at Adam twice but she dodges both times and kicks Adam again]

Adam: Come on, what the fuck is this?

Sera: You want me to teach you how to beat angels? That's what I'm doing.

Adam: By beating the shit out of me?

[As Adam charged at Sera, the latter took her hairnet down, revealing her full hair at lower position]

Sera: By showing you the flaws in your own fighting style. Yours and all your old soldiers.

Adam: Wait... you know I was an exorcist? How?

Sera: You have two giant red wings on your back, you hang out with an exorcist, and you wield an angelic weapon. It's not rocket science. Before you found out about me, did you know angels could be harmed?

Adam: No.

[Adam goes to kick her again but this time Adam dodges. She goes for a knee kick, and it hits]

Sera: That shows in how you fight. You leave yourself open with every swing. You fight like someone unafraid of harm, and this is what you'll take advantage of. Angels wield no shields, little armor and fight with reckless abandon. Strike them here, here, and here. [Kicks Adam in the back of his head, his spine, and stomach.]

Adam: Argh! My spine! Fuck! And with what? Some secret weapon of yours?

Sera: Idiotic boy, are you really that dense you don't realize you're holding the answer right in your hand?

Adam: Angelic weapons? It's that simple? How has no one else figured this out?

Sera: Angelic steel isn't common, and those who have it aren't exactly rushing off to test it against exorcists.

[Scene cuts to a flashback with Sera and Emily during the last extermination trying to avoid exorcists. But as they are running, they get caught by 3 of them.]

Sera: But when my sister and I were cornered in that last extermination, I tried to buy time for her to escape, and well... You don't become an angelic weapons dealer without having one weapon on you first.

[One of the exorcists flies in the air and charges at Sera. She then jumps in the air. The angelic steel blade on her sleeves sparkle, as she falls down and uses the blades to cut the exorcist's head off]

[The scene cuts back to Sera and Adam as Sera begins to sing.]

Sera: ♫I see you're driven by your detestation. Your every step is stoked with animus. You need a different type of motivation. Or there's no way that you can handle this. I know you're thirstin' for vengeance. I see it in your eyes. You're out for blood. But you'll only stand a chance if you're out for love. Out for love~Love~♫

[As Sera sings, she and Adam continue to spar]

Sera: ♫Think of who you care about. Protect them and be out. For love~ Love~You'll fight without gloves. If you're out for love. Fill yourself with the fear of losin'. That somebody who's your reason to live. Harnеss your heart and you can't help choosin'. To fight with all you can give. I know you'rе thirstin' for vengeance. I see it in your eyes. You're out for blood. But you'll only stand a chance if you're out for love. Out for love~ Love~ Think of who you care about. Protect them and be out. For love~Love~

[Sera jumps down from the stairs.]

Sera: You're gonna fight without gloves. And when that push comes to shove. Yeah, you just might rise above. Long as you're out for love♫

[Adam slides down from the stairs and jumps into the air as his gold wings grow back.]

Adam: Wooo. Yeah! I look so fuckin' good.

Sera: Well, look at that. You might just survive this.

Adam: We're going to need more weapons.

[Cut back to Valentino and Lute. The former takes the latter to her room.]

Valentino: Alright, what has you so out of sorts, carino? Ya' clearly got more on your mind than angels.

Lute: [She sighs] What do you do when someone you love lies to you about who they are?

Valentino: Romance? Ah. My specialty! Come on, querida. Tell me the details!

Lute: My boyfriend used to lead the exorcist angels, and he never told me.

Valentino: Oh, shit! Quite a secret, isn't it? How does that make you feel

Lute: It just...It makes me angry, because we share everything, because she always supported me, and my ideas, and-and- and now, I don't know whether or not that was just more of the lies! [She gasps] Oh no that's a horrible thing to think! Do i think that?! Yes! N-no. Kinda? [She sits on couch while whimpering]

Valentino: You said you love this boy. Right?

Lute: Yes. Or well, I...yes.

Valentino: Have you ever once doubted that he loved you in return? [As he spoke, Rosie sits down next to Lute, who shakes her head at the question.] Well, then what's the problem?

Lute: He used to lead in the very thing we've been working so hard to end! I know i used to be an exorcist, and i regret every part of it...

Valentino: Well, isn't that silly hotel of yours all about redemption?

Lute: Yes?

Valentino: Perhaps this boy, was trying to redeem himself too.

Lute: He knows better than anyone that i believe in second chances, why not tell me?

Valentino: Well...you see. It can be extremely difficult to admit to things you're not very proud of, especially if those things hurt the ones you love. He fucked up, sure. He fucked up real badly. He's flawed. But, hey, who down here isn't? If there's anything I've learned while being down here, is that words are cheap, but actions, they speak the truth. So, what have his actions said?

Lute: That he believes in me, and what we're doing. Right now he's off learning how to protect everything we've worked for. And, I can't even pitch my hotel right!

Valentino: Well how do you normally explain your hotel?

Lute: By singing. But that never works.

Valentino: It will work here. Trust me. Lots of my workers really love musical porn movies. Haha. Now come on. Vamos.

[Cut back to the crowd. Lute and Valentino both walk back up on the stage. Vox hands Lute his microphone, and Lute begins to sing.]

Lute: ♫Have you ever wanted something. That was so clear in your mind that you could taste it?♫

Travis: You mean like puss-

Lute: Eugh, sort of. ♫It's a feeling like a rumbling in your gut. That you could finally be faced with. A billion needy faces, I guess what I mean to say is. For the first time in my life. I might have to be ready for this. Ready to be the one who's leading from the front. Gotta come into my own. Gotta come into my throne. Gotta take charge and defend my only home. And although I kinda feel unsteady. Now I need to be ready for this♫

[Lute marches into the crowd]

Lute: ♫Have you ever felt like you're willing to die. To save the people of your city?♫

Travis: By die, you mean use my teeth to rip flesh apart?

Lute: That's a start! Cause right now, we need a leader. And it seems to me that. Destiny has picked me to be that. If you'll allow me. So who's with me?♫

[Lute starts dancing]

Lute: ♫Wouldn't it be super to see more of Hell?. Join up now if you like travel. Come on people, hop in the saddle. A lot of sights to see en route to my hotel. Not to mention the camaraderie. Yes siree, you'll form life-changing friendships. With the folks along the way♫

Vox: ♫And feast on all the angels you can eat!♫

Lute: ♫Okay...♫<

[The crowd joins in on the song and start dancing as well]

The crowd: ♫It's time now to act. They're on the attack♫

[Vox takes his microphone back and Valentino hands Lute a parade stick]

The Crowd: When they move to strike. We will fight biting back!. We'll follow your lead. We're eager to feed. We'll sharpen our teeth. For the heavenly feast!. From this moment on, you can count on us. To be resolute and ravenous. Our appetites are whet. And we're set to seize the day. So I say, "Oh hey! Come join the flesh buffet!"♫

Lute: ♫Well, that's a little violent. Can we tone it down?♫

Valentino: ♫Oh, don't be put off by their snarlin'. That's just enthusiasm, darlin'!♫

Lute: ♫Eh, they just seem a little murdery right now♫

Valentino: ♫Don't worry, honey. That's their thing. So just keep singing.♫

Lute & Valentino: ♫We're super duper grateful. To have you folks aboard!♫

The crowd: ♫Can't wait to taste an angel's wings♫

Lute: ♫Oh, Lord...For the first time in my life♫

[2 people grab Lute and carry her as they all march down the road]

Lute: ♫Maybe I can be ready for this. I can be the marshal leading the parade. I can come into my own. And I think I've always known. My destiny could not be postponed. When the angels brings the battle here. I must appear like I'm ready for this♫

Valentino: ♫They're dancing along. They're singing her song♫

Vox: ♫Surprised? Why, I knew she could do it all along♫

Valentino & Vox: ♫She's bound to pass the test as the new princess of Hell. Like her step-Mommy she is madly power-fell!♫

Alastor: ♫She's filled with potential that I could guide♫

Valentino: ♫I concur♫

Valentino & Vox: ♫Stick with her, you'll be on the winning side♫

All: ♫For the first time in our lives. We know that we are ready for this♫

Valentino: ♫ We'll show heaven a fight they won't forget♫

All: ♫It's time to take a stand♫

Lute: ♫It is time to lend a hand!♫

The Crowd: Huzzah!

Lute: ♫Against the angels and their deadly threat!♫

All: ♫We cannot take it anymore. The time has come to go to war♫

[Travis gives a nod of approval]

All: ♫Prepare to fight, we're ready for...THIS!♫

Lute: ♫Hopefully im ready for this...♫

[Scene cut to back at the gates of the hotel. Lute is coming from the left with the army of workers while Adam is coming from the right with multiple crates of weapons]

Adam: Looks like you had a really busy day. Huh?

Lute: You too.

Adam: Lute. I just wanna say that im sor-

Lute: Hold that thought. Err.. Ah! [She takes out the gift she got for Adam.] I got you this...I got you a souvenir from downtown.

[Adam gasps and has an apologetic expression. He goes to hug Lute]

Adam: Oh, Lutey.

Lute: Your wings are new. They look nice~. Makes you look even more handsome. Now come on, let's go home.

[Both Adam and Lute walk into the hotel, as they find Katie, Vaggie, Husk and Tom still at the hotel as they all work on defenses for the hotel together.]

Husk: Come along, let's put some effort into these fortifications.

Katie Killjoy: Yeah, fortify that... [She notices Adam and Lute.] Well, look who decided to show up. We thought we were gonna be fightin' by ourselves.

Adam: You're...You guys are still here?

Husk: What? Do you think we're a bunch of pussies? [He notices the others look at him.] No pussycat jokes.

Tom Trench: Yeah yeah. Well. I just got used to you guys. [He scoffs] I am not about to find new drinking buddies.

Vaggie: I've named all the stains on the carpet. [She giggles] That one is named Frederic.

Lute: Well, looks like we have a lot of work to do. I hope you guys are ready too.

(Chapter ends here.)

Chapter Text

[The chapter opens in Alastor's surveillance room, as overlapping videos from various cameras stationed around the Hazbin Hotel play on the screens stationed around him. Alastor himself is sitting in his office chair, watching them all while drinking from his mug]

Alastor: No fucking way! They're going to fight? Oh, my god. Hahahaha! Oh, looks like your little hotel didn't work out so well. [He watches a screen with Vox on it, which glitches slightly] Oh, Vox, I cannot wait to watch you get FUCKED! Ahahahaha!

[Alastor laughs maniacally as the camera pans away from his chair and screens.]

[The scene changes to show the porn workers all gathered outside the hotel, practising with their weapons. As Luze watches them all from the hotel's entrance, Adam comes up to her]

Lute: [She sighs] Oh, I wish my mom were here to see this.

Adam: The workers seem ready to fight. Are we?

[Husk bursts out of the hotel's doors, wearing a Victorian-style British army uniform and looking proud of himself]

Husk: Fear not, damsel. I shall have the staff ready for victorious combat!

Adam: What in the hell are you supposed to be?

Husk: [He salutes Adam.] General Husker, reporting for duty. I'll turn those rapscallions into soldiers in no time at all!

Lute: Thank you, Husk.

[Adam, running around the hotel's entrance, now runs up to Husk]

Vaggie: What can I do to help?

Husk: I'm glad, you asked, soldier. The base needs fortifications. Reinforce the southern wall! Create a moat around the perimeter to stop a ground assault.

[Vaggie blinks up at Husk, having no idea what he just said]

Lute: How about this. If you see an angel, stab it! [She hands Vaggie a small blade.]

[Vaggie moves her head to Adam, and thinking that Adam was what Lute meant, almost charges towards him with her knife.]

Vaggie: Stab! Stab! Stab!

Adam: Hey, hey, hey, hey!

[Lute quickly picks Vaggie up as she still runs in mid-air.]

Lute: Not him!

[As Vaggie calms down a little, Lute finally puts her down, then Vaggie runs off to find other things to stab.]

Adam: [drill sergeant style] Listen up, sinners! We've got 24 hours before the Extermination begins. Let's get to work.

[As the porn workers and the hotel's residents begin training to fight, Alastor continues to watch them all train from his surveillance room]

Alastor: Oh, they suck. Oh, they suck so bad! Oh, God. They're gonna fucking die! They're- they're gonna die.

[Back at the hotel, Lute is holding Vox's microphone, preparing to give a speech to the porn workers and the hotel's residents]

Lute: Hello? [She taps on the microphone.] I want to thank everyone for coming. Even people who aren't staying here yet...Angel.

Angel Dust: Look, I can't resist a fight, okay? Especially when I get to tag team with this fuckhead. [He wraps arm around Katie, who smiles.]

Lute: Tomorrow, the Exorcist Angels will face a Hell ready to defend itself and win!

Adam: Yeah! Yeah, we will! Tell 'em, baby!

Lute: Yes! And we are-we are going to win! But in case we don't, I want you all to know... that getting to know you has been the biggest honor of my life. Whatever redemption really means, I know you all tried. I have seen the good in all of you. And it's...I-I'm just...I love you all, so much, and-and live tonight however you want because-

Vaggie: We're all gonna die! [She laughs maniacally] So cool!

Adam: [He stares at Vaggie in shock like everyone else, before he starts clapping.] Alright! Let's give it up for not dying! Love not dying. [He pauses] Drinks anyone?

[Inside the hotel, the gang are sharing drinks, talking and laughing with one another]

Adam: I mean, personally, I'm excited. It's been a while since I stabbed anyone and really meant it, you know what I mean?

Angel Dust: Cheers, bitches!

Tom: Yeah!

Katie: Here's to us!

Husk: Here's to being alive today and not dying tomorrow!

[Vox and Vaggie watch the rest of the group drinking from the mezzanine]

Vox: Ah, the celebratory night before a courageous last stand. It's been a surprising thrill to witness these wayward souls find connection. Almost makes one sentimental, eh, Vaggie?

Vaggie: I really like them, Vox. They let me put on roach puppet shows without booing or laughing at me if they don't have to laugh!

Vox: Ah, an enjoyable collective to be around. I admit one could get accustomed.

[Vaggie hops on top of Vox's head and places a crown made of roaches and sticks on his head]

Vaggie: I dub thee, King Roach.

Vox: Oh, to understand your twisted little crazy mind!

[Vox and Vaggie begin laughing maniacally together, signalling that they possibly do understand each other's twisted little minds.]

Vaggie: I really like it here.

[Meanwhile, Katie is sitting by the parlor as Tom pours her a drink]

Tom: Most likely possible last day of afterlife, and you're not off snorting a line off some hunk's abs?

Katie: Eh, you fucked one pool boy, you fucked 'em all.

Tom: I guess you have changed.

Katie: Hey, Lute said we can live tonight however we wanted... so pour me a fresh one, and let's get to living!

[As Tom pours Katie another drink, Husk tentatively approaches Angel, who is talking to Adam]

Husk: Mister Angel Dust? Angel?

Angel Dust: Yeah?

Husk: I want to tell you that I...I love...I'd love to wish you good luck in the battle ahead. [He shakes Angel's hand.]

Angel Dust: Okay.

Husk: You are...have always been a worthy opponent. With the most...brilliant explosive contraptions I've ever seen.

Angel Dust: Uh...thanks?

Husk: Anyway, I guess...please don't die tomorrow. Okay, bye!

[Husk runs away as Katie comes up to Angel, passing him a shot]

Katie: You know, you could totally tap that.

Angel Dust: Tss, don't be gross.

Katie: You know. I hear he's good at sex with guys. And his wings flap up and down when he's doing good.

[Angel looks back at Husk]

Angel Dust: Huh.

[The scene cuts to Lute, standing outside Katie's bedroom door. A few photos of Katie and the rest of the group are stuck to his door. Lute, looks at them, smiling, before realising that she might never see them again if they lose the battle tomorrow, and begins to break down and cry]

Adam: Lute?

[Lute turns to see Adam standing in the corridor, watching her. Lute turns away from him]

Lute: I'm sorry...I'm...I'm just so scared. What if we lose? What if we never see each other again.

Adam: ♪You've, already done so much for us. [He begins to walk towards Lute] So many lives you've saved. So many souls you've changed. And in the end, if it's only me you've helped♪

Lute & Adam: ♪There's something that I've been meaning to tell. More than anything. More than anything. Need you to know I love you more than anything. More than anything.♪

[Lute and Adam hold each other close and kiss.]

Lute: Thanks Adam...That really made me feel better.

[In Heaven, the Exorcists are all lined up outside Heaven's gates as Pentious gives them all a pep talk]

Pentious: Alright bitchesss. Extermination Day is here. We're going to go down and exterminate demon ass!

Cherri: Destroy that ass!

Pentious: Prepare to slaughter every sinner in that shit hotel, and you all remember Adam?

[The Exorcists all boo at the name of Adam]

Exorcists: Boo! We hate him!

Cherri: Rip Adam's cunt mouth out through his ass!

Pentious: Would you just-ju-chill, Cherri. Fuck. Anyway, whoever brings me Adam's head gets...uh, I dunno, a million Heaven bucks. How about that, huh? And with Lute, ya'll remember her too? Yeah. Spare her. Cus i wanna kill her myself. [The Exorcists all cheer] Haha, yeah! Ladies, let's fuck shit up! [accompanied by a guitar sting] ♪ATTACK!♪

Cherri: FORWARD!

[Behind Pentious, a portal to Hell opens and all of the Exorcists fly through it. The portal opens right outside the hotel, where Lute, Adam, Katie, Angel, Husk, Vaggie, Tom and the porn workers are gathered by the entrance. Lute has a golden shield with an apple motif, Adam has his angelic harpoon, Vaggie has the small knife that Lute gave her (and is laughing maniacally), Katie has a tommy gun, Angel has a bomb in all four of his hands, and Husk has a short sword. Their weapons have all been given angelic steel enhancements to allow them to kill the Exorcists.]

Adam: Here they come. Get ready, everyone. We fight together!

[As the group prepares to attack, Rosie, Mimzy and Alastor are all sitting in front of a TV in TOE Tower, which is showing real-time camera footage from the hotel. Rosie and Mimzy look bored, with Mimzy focused only on her phone, but Alastor has a box of popcorn and is excited to watch them all die.]

Alastor: Oh, oh. Oh, this is going to be good!

[At the hotel, Adam raises his harpoon.]

Adam: Now! FOR YOUR SOULS!

[The group cheers and charge as the Exorcists begin pouring out of the portal, charging back at them]

Lute: Let's FUCK THEM UP!

[As the Exorcists and the hotel group begins fighting, Vox stands on the hotel's roof, watching the angels flying out]

Vox: Let the slaughter begin. AHAHAHAHAHAHA-HA!

[Vox laughs maniacally as he swings his microphone, causing a huge force field to appear around the hotel which traps the attacking Exorcists inside. Pentious and Cherri watch in confusion from outside the force field]

Pentious: The fuck?

Cherri: They appear to have some kind of shield, sir!

Pentious: (sarcastically) Oh, really? I didn't see this giant fucking shield in front of me, YOU DUMB BITCH! NO SHIT!

[The force field sprouts tentacles and begins killing Exorcists that are on the outside of the force field with angelic weapons.]

Pentious: That's how they can kill us? With our own weapons?! Fucking weak, dude.

[As Cherri raises her sword and flies to attack the shield, Katie and Angel attack Exorcists from the inside of the force field, with Katie shooting with his Tommy gun and Angel throwing two of his explosives. Husk watches them from his cannons]

Katie: Come and get some!

Angel Dust: Eat shrapnel, fuckers!

Husk: All angelic weapons fire at will!

[Tom throws his explosive cards at angels]

Tom: Hey! Yelling while fighting...doesn't help.

[Vaggie runs around stabbing every angel she can see, even the dead ones. Lute and Adam are fighting back to back]

Lute: Vox's shield is working!

Adam: Trying to focus, sweetie!

Lute: We might actually have a chance to win this battle!

Adam: Love the optimism Lute. But im still trying to focus.

[Pentious and Cherri are still hovering over the force field. Pentious clearly has had enough of being left out of the battle]

Pentious: I'm fucking over this.

[Pentious draws backwards before flying straight at the shield. With one punch, he causes it to dissipate, leaving the hotel exposed]

Katie: Oh Fuck!

Lute: Oh, no!

[As the smoke clears, Pentious sees Vox standing on the roof. Recognising him as the creator of the shield, Pentious flies down to the roof to meet him. The TOE's (IM STILL LAUGHING AT THE SHORT VERSION OF THE GROUP'S NAME!) watch from their Tower, Alastor preparing to see Vox die.]

Alastor: Oh, fuck! I am so hard right now! [He makes a thrust gesture for a couple seconds while Mimzy seems uncomfy of Alastor making the gesture at her.]

[Meanwhile, Vox takes a few steps forward to meet Pentious.]

Vox: Serpent! You're the next person to die.

Pentious: Who the fuck are you? And it's Sir Pentious! NOT Serpent!

Vox: The name's Vox, it's a pleasure to be meeting you, quite a pleasure. I'm about to end your fucking life. [He taps his cane on the ground, causing four tentacles to rise up around him]

Pentious: (sarcastically) Nice voice. Don't you know that nobody watches televisssion anymore? It is for PUSSIES! [He summons his sword and flies straight at Vox.]

[Vox just stands still as his tentacles lash out at Pentious. Pentious slashes at them all before gearing up to attack Vox himself]

Vox: Ah ah ah!

[Pentious attempts to attack Voy with his guitar, but Vox moves smoothly out of the way, before sending more tentacles towards Pentious]

Pentious: You really think you can take me on? A mortal sssoul is no match for me, flat-head.

Vox: You should know better than anyone what a soul can accomplish when they take charge of their own fate.

[Vox's shadow looms behind him, making it appear as though there was a crack in the hotel's roof. The crack leads up to Pentious, where one of Vox's shadow monsters appears and punches Pentious in the stomach]

Pentious: Ohoho, you think you're tough shit, huh? [He destroys Vox's shadow monster.]

Vox: Tougher than you. Ha ha ha!

[Pentious swings at Vox with his sword. Vox easily dodges his strikes]

Vox: Wanna know why? It is because. You lack discipline, control, and worst, [He goes into his full demon form] YOU'RE SLOPPY!

[More of Vox's shadow creatures appear, attacking Pentious and crawling all over him, sending him flying upwards]

Pentious: And you're...you're...[He realises he doesn't know what to say as a comeback.] fuck-fuck you...you blue piece of f-too much fucking tv on you...fuck...shut up!

[Using one of his tentacles, Vox grabs Pentious and throws him into the sign on the hotel's roof]

Vox: Ha ha ha! Poetry! Just got into it. Oh how would you know? Snakes can't read.

Pentious: I'm going to wipe that shit-eating grin off your face, CAUSE TV IS JUST FUCKING BRAINROT!

[He flies a few metres into the air and swings his guitar, sending a shockwave towards Vox. When it dissipates, Vox has been forced out of his full demon form and his microphone has been snapped in two]

Vox: [with absolutely no tv static in his voice.] What just happened? [He notices his broken microphone.] ...Oh fuck...

[While Vox is distracted by his microphone, Pentious manages to score a hit on him, slashing him across the torso and sending him flying back to the edge of the roof. Alastor cheers from their tower.]

Alastor: Yes! Fuck you, Vox! [He flips off screen.] Ahahaha! [He jumps on top of table.] THIS IS BETTER THAN SEX!

[Back at the hotel; Vox picks up the 2 pieces of his microphone, trying to go back into his full demon form, but being too injured]

Vox: (singsong) Have to disagree with you there! Television not dead, or brainrot, but i am ending this show.

[Vox flees the battle and melts into his shadow. Pentious, laughing, watches him disappear while leaning on his sword.]

Pentious: Hah. Bye, bitch!

[Meanwhile, Alastor watches in anger from The Tower, disappointed that Vox wasn't dead and angry at him for seemingly fleeing like a coward]

Alastor: No! Fuck you fuck you fuck you! You dumb pussy!!

[At the front of the hotel, Husk commands the workers from the balcony]

Husk: Right flank, advance! Left flank, watch your six. [While addressing Adam and Lute] You guys. There are more coming up on your right. Get ready for them, Liutenant!

Lute: That's nowhere near close to my name, but thanks got it. Love the nickname! [She's is hitting angels with her shield, apologising to each of them as she does so] Sorry! Sorry. Sorry-sorry, sorry!

Adam: Now's not the time for that, babe!

Lute: Oh, right.

[Five angels fly at Adam, out to kill him. Vaggie uses her fireworks to explode them all]

Lute: DIE, MOTHERFUCKERS!

[As the angels explode. Adam looks at Lute.]

Adam: Well fuck me. I got the baddest girlie in hell as my love.

Lute: Awww. Thanks babe.

[Tom jumps around the hotel, throwing his playing cards. Katie, near him, is shooting them all with his tommy gun]

Tom: These fucking angels won't stop coming!

[Katie laughs, his dirty mind turning it into a sex joke]

Tom: Okay, I walked right into that one. Point goes to you.

[Katie sees an Exorcist advancing on 2 of the Kitten Boiz]

Katie: Hold that thought.

[Katie runs to defend the kittens, one of them having already been killed by the Exorcist. Katie blocks the Exorcist's sword with her tommy gun, before shooting it up with a pair of guns.]

Katie: [She speaks to the Kitten Boi.] You alright, squirt?

Kitten Boi: I nearly...got myself killed...

Katie: Get somewhere safe.

[Katie is knocked off his feet by a huge explosion. The smoke clears, revealing it to be Pentious, flying above everyone and shooting angelic light from his hands]

Pentious: SUCK MY HOLY LIGHT, FUCKERS! YEAH!

Lute: What? Vox was supposed to handle him. Oh no, he must be-

[Lute and Adam run to safety as Pentious attempts to shoot at them. Husk watches them]

Adam: We aren't going to last long unless we do something about him.

[Husk looks up at Pentious.]

Husk: Of course.

[Angel runs past Husk to get to a better vantage point, holding a bomb. Husk pulls him back down.]

Angel Dust: I'm trying to fight here! You out of your fucking mind?

Husk: Yes i am! [He kisses Angel, the bomb falling out of his hand and exploding behind them] Mister Angel Dust. I love you. I love you so very much! Remember me!

[Husk runs off to his airship. Angel looks back at him]

Angel Dust: That was kinda hot tho. Not gonna lie.

[Husk enters his airship, the Kitten Boiz lined up around the inside. As he walks past them, they salute]

Husk: Kittens. Activate thrusters, and charge the death ray.

Kitten Boiz: Yes, sir.

[Husk's airship starts up and lifts itself off of the hotel. Everyone else watches]

Lute: Husk?

Katie: Oh he's a crazy motherfucker.

[The airship flies towards Pentious, aiming the death ray at him]

Kitten Boi: Target in range.

Husk: Fire.

[The airship edges closer and closer to Pentious, the death ray charging up. Pentious notices it]

Pentious: Oh, whoop!

[With one blast from his finger, Pentious incinerates the airship and everyone inside it]

Pentious: Haha, that coulda been ugly.

[Everyone stares in horror from the ground]

Vaggie: Noo!

Katie: Fuck...

Lute: No...

Katie: Fuck...You did amazing, buddy.

Lute: No, no, no.

[Lute, crying, sinks to her knees. Adam runs over to her]

Adam: Lute, I'm so sorry...

[Lute growls as the tears run down her face, the sadness turning into rage. She stands up]

Lute: THAT FUCKER!

[Angered, Lute engulfs herself in a tornado of fire and rises up. When it dissipates, her wings pop out as two more sets of eyes open on her head.]

Lute: LET'S FUCKING KILL THEM ADAM!

[Lute and Adam begin to fly. The rest of them watch from the ground, cheering]

Katie: Yeah! Get 'em!

[Adam and Lute fly higher and higher, towards Pentious and Cherri.]

Pentious: Oh, look who thinks they're badass now!

Cherri: Those traitors came to die.

[Cherri lunges down and slices Adam's wings, but not completely, causing him to yell in pain. He screams as he falls down, and crashes through the glass ceiling and right in the hotel lobby. Adam gets up just as Cherri raises her sword, and they stare each other in the face.]

Cherri: Before I take your life, i'm going to make sure you suffer more pain than ever.

Adam: Go ahead and try it, you little bitch.

[A fight bell rings as Cherri lunges at Adam, He manages to throw her into the wall. Cherri flies back at Adam and throws him to the ground, hitting his head against it repeatedly. Adam manages to flip her over, but Cherri throws him into the wall again, before lunging at him with her sword. Adam dodges and Cherri rams her sword into the wall. Pulling it out, she leaps at Adam and smashes her head into the table, breaking Adam's nose. Adam grabs one of Vox's microphone that he left on the table and hits Cherri with it. As the two continue fighting, Lute watches from the sky.]

Lute: Adam!

[Lute begins to fly down to help Adam, but Pentious appears in her flight path]

Pentious: Ssssurprissse, ya' bitch!

[With one arm, Pentious smashes Lute into the sign on the hotel's roof, electrocuting her. Lute falls onto the roof as Pentious flies above the hotel's sign]

Pentious: Risking your immortal life for sinners? That's some crazy shit, even for Lilith's adopted brat!

Lute: These sinners are like family to me!

Pentious: [Mocking Lute in a high pitched girly voice] "These sinners are like family to meh"! Do you even hear yourself? You should've stayed in your place, girlie-

[Lute stabs him in the arm with her sword, before swinging him around to throw him across the roof]

Lute: That's Princess of Hell to you, snake!

Pentious: The fuck? That hurt!

[Lute looks at him, with a deadly angry glare, and holding her sword. Pentious stands up and laughs evily.]

Pentious: Hehe. Okay.

[Back in the hotel's foyer, Cherri throws Adam to the ground, knocking his harpoon out of his hand]

Cherri: I knew you were always weak.

[Adam tries to reach for his harpoon, but Cherri flips it off the ground and out of her reach with her foot, before driving it into Adam's right hand. And he screams in pain]

Cherri: So, I'll spare you the pain of seeing your bitch die.

[Adam looks up and sees that the mezzanine is on the verge of collapse. Pulling the harpoon out of hie hand, he uses it to throw Cherri off of him before flying up and destroy the last pillars holding it up. Cherri screams as it falls on her as plumes of sawdust fly everywhere. When it clears, the LED face has come off of Cherri's mask, her left leg is pinned under the rubble]

Cherri: Go ahead. Do it, then. Kill me.

Adam: Seriously, you're just pathetic. You do know that, right? You're seriously ready to die rather than accepting mercy from me? No, i'll spare you. You can live...You can live with knowing the fact that you only do because I let you live your life. Because you're just. A failure.

[Lute screams and Adam hears her scream in the distance, Adam flies out of the hole in the hotel's roof to help her. As soon as he is gone, Cherri, not accepting his mercy, she begins to free herself from under the rubble. She screams in pain as she pulls her left leg out of its socket, thus, freeing the rest of her body]

[On the hotel's roof, Pentious knocks Lute to the ground, before picking her up by the throat.]

Lute: Let...me...go!

Pentious: This fight was cute n'all, but it's time to die with the rest of them!

[Adam flies to the roof to help Lute, but Cherri flies after him and pins him to the floor]

Adam: Lute!

[As Pentious laughs, suddenly, a fist appears and punches Pentious very hard that it sends him flying into the hotel's sign, before falling through the roof. The person catches Lute as it is revealed to be noone other Lilith, with her black wings out and sporting a different dress, this one isn't purple, instead, full black and white]

Lute: Mom?

Lilith: Sorry I wasn't here sooner, sweetie. I was choosing if i should wear my crown or not.

Lute: [She laugh.] Classical you.

[Lilith lands and puts Lute down. Pentious climbs back onto the roof.]

Pentious: Okay, seriously! How many of you fucking freaks do I have to fight?!

[Lilith walks up to Pentious, rolling up her sleeves to fight.]

Lilith: Oh, I'm the only one that matters right now. You see, you messed with my daughter, and now, I am going to FUCK you like crazy!

[Pentius stares at Lilith, perplexed. Cherri and Adam stop their fight to stare in confusion at Lilith. Katie cocks an eyebrow, smiling as Tom gives her a deadpanned look and the other Exorcists also stare in confusion. Alastor, Rosie and Mimzy stare at the screen from their Tower, Alastor looks perplexed, Mimzy wearing a smile, and Rosie saying:]

Rosie: Well, things just got a hundred more times interesting.

[Lute, slightly embarrassed, leans towards Lilith, and corrects her.]

Lute: [Whispering.] It's "fuck you up like crazy", mom.

Lilith: ...Wait, what did I say?

[Pentious flies at Lilith with a battle cry, smashing him into the wall. Lilith flies out of his grasp.]

Lilith: Hyahahah! So you're the one replacing Adam? [She dodges Pentious.] Gotta say, you're really not fit to lead, buddy. You don't even have muscles.

[Pentious grabs Lilith by the foot. Lilith frees herself by kicking him away.]

Pentious: Ohoh. You're judging me?! Atleast i didn't leave my husband to fuck a fallen angel!

[Pentious tries to shoot his angelic light at Lilith, but she easily dodges them.]

Lilith: Oh well he wasn't fallenn when i met him. And he certainly loves what i did to him in bed. I could even show YOUR girlfriend what i can do with my mouth. Im open to females too. Bow-chicka-pow-pow! [She flies away doing a little dance. Pentious briefly manages to hold her in a chokehold.]

Pentious: I'll fuckin' end you! You cannot talk about my second in command like that!

[Lilith kicks Pentious away by kicking him in the stomach]

Lilith: Whoa, missed me! Be lucky i don't kick you in the dick. Hoohoo, you're not even close to hurting me. [She dodges Pentious's light again.] Haha! Nice try, douchebag!

Pentious: Hold still, you motherfucker!

[Lute watches the two of them fighting for a few moments before running over to help Adam. Meanwhile Lilith has Pentious wrapped up in her arms, before Pentious chucks her away. Pentious charges up a huge blast of angelic light at Lilith. Lilith dodges and the light chops the hotel straight in half. Lute screams as she falls down the middle, the entire hotel crumbling around her. She tries to use her wings but she fails. Then, Lilith swoops down and catches her.]

Lilith: Din't worry, i got ya.

[Lute smiles before hearing Pentious laughing, she looks and sees him charging up to them.]

Lute: Mom, look out!

Lilith: Huh?

[Lute snarls as she used her robotic arm as she makes it into a hige claw, it's red with darken splotches, and blocks Pentious just as he was about to punch them,]

Pentious: Whoa wait, what the fuck?!

[Lilith and Lute glare at Pentious menacingly, before they catapult him to the ground screaming, the impact leaving a blast wave of smoke, and a crater where he lay. He looks up and sees Lilith in her full demonic form, a spark of flame is above her crown, as her horns grow out, and her eyes glow purple.]

Lilith: YOU COME AT ME, AND MY DAUGHTER! AND HER FRIENDS! DON'T FORGET, YOU'RE IN MY HOUSE RIGHT NOW! YOU STUPID BITCH! [She proceeds to punch Pentious senselessly, fire coming from her hands as she does so and laughs at Pentious being in pain.] HAHA!

[Lilith then summons a sphere of fire, preparing to finish Pentious off, before Lute puts her hand on Lilith's shoulder, getting her attention, and calming her down, and her eyes returning to normal.]

Lute: Whoa, whoa, Mom. Enough...He's had enough now.

[They look down to Pentious, who lies motionless on the ground. The two royals then leave the crater, still staring at Pentious.]

Lilith: [She looks at Lute.] Alright, just for you sweetie. [She looks back at Pentious and flies out of the hole.] How does mercy taste, you little bitch?

Pentious: No... [He gets up.] you don't get to end this! [He gets out of crater and faces the gang.] I'm the fucking leader of the exorcists, and you're just some fucking clown or something! If it wasn't for me. You wouldn't be here! You all should be worshipping me, you ungrateful, disgusting, fucking losers-!

[Just as he says these words, a small knife is stabbed through him, making Pentious shout in pain. Everyone looks in shock as an angelic blade is stabbed right through his chest.]

Adam: [Suprised but smiles.] Woa-hoah!

Lilith: Hey, y-ya got somethin' stickin' outta your... your things there.

[Pentipus collapses face first to the ground, revealing Vaggie on his back, having sneaked up behind and stabbed Pentious.]

Lute: Vaggie?!

[As everyone is suprised, Adam just smiles at how Vaggie stabbed Pentious. Vaggie stares blankly at Pentious for a few seconds before smiling and viciously stabbing Pentious again and again, his golden blood going all over her.]

Vaggie: STAB! STABBY! STABBY! STAB! STAB! Hahahaha! Haha! Hahaha! RUEAhahaha!

[Alastor, Rosie & Mimzy stare in shock at the screen from TOE Tower]

Alastor: Ho-ly shit!

[Back outside the hotel.]

Vaggie: Beautiful golden blood! Hahahaha!!

[A little way away, Cherri turns and looks in horror at Pentious's body]

Cherri: NOOOO! [She dashes up to Pentious just as Cherri skips off, Cherri turns Pentious to face her.] Sir! Sir! Stay with me sir! [Pentious gives her a small smile before dying.] PENTIOUS! NO!

[The others then come up to her, Lute and Lilith in their demonic forms.]

Lute: It's finally over.

Lilith: So take your little friends, and GO HOME NOW! Please.

[Cherri realises that the only option she has is obeying him and picks up Pentious's halo, which has stopped glowing.]

Cherri: Retreat! All Exorcists fall back!

[With that command, all the surviving Exorcists take off to the portal to Heaven, Cherri following behind the exorcists, scowling. the portal then closes as Lilith looks to the group.]

Lilith: Sooo uuuhhh...[She sighs.] Who's up for some nachos?

[Only Vaggie raises her hand, everyone else just looks at her, unamused.]

[The scene cuts to a newsflash from 666 News]

Zestial: Good evening. I'm Zestial Morde!

Zeezi: And I'm-

[Zestial shoves Zeezi out of her seat and out of the frame kf the cameras.]

Zestial: Nobody gives a shit who you are, Zilla. Breaking news-Extermination day is cancelled!

[Arackniss and Crymini are seen looking at a billboard which is playing the news report. The news report begins to play clips from the fight with the Exorcists]

Zestial: Lute Morningstar has managed to fend off the angelic attack with more than just nice words.

[In the Downtown, Valentino watches the news report while sipping tea.]

Valentino: Buen trabajo, Lute.

[Meanwhile in the TOE Tower, Mimzy watches the news on her phone. Rosie comes over and briefly looks over her shoulder, before walking away to play the same news report on her television]

Zestial: In an unseen turn of events, our demonic head honcho Lilith stepped in to save her daughter's ass in the last moment. We're also hearing reports that Sir Pentious, the leader of the angelic legions, and totally fuckable bad boy, has been slain by a filthy janitor.

[From his surveillance room, Alastor watches the news, which is now showing Vaggie being interviewed, staring blankly at the camera.]

[Elsewhere again, Sera watches the news from her office, a small smile on her face.]

Zestial: The janitor said, and i quote, "Lute told me to stab an angel, so I did". Anyway, congrats to Lute and her crew for not being totally fucking useless for once.

[The scene cuts to Lute, Adam, Angel Dust, Tom, Vaggie, Katie and Lilith digging through the rubble of the Hazbin Hotel. Tom picks up a broken bottle. Lute runs through the hotel with Adam, looking anxiously around. She sees KeeKee lying in the rubble and picks her up.]

Lute: Oh...there, there. It's...it's okay.

[Lute looks over and smiles briefly when she sees Angel and Fat Nuggets reuniting. She begins to walk towards them, but she stops when she steps on something. Lute looks down to see the banner, which still reads "Happy first week, Husk!". Adam walks over to her]

Lute: ♪He did it for us. The ultimate sacrifice. He gave me his trust, and look how we paid the price. All this bloodshed could have been avoided if I convinced Heaven to work together♪

[Lute walks through the hotel's ruins to the edge of the precipice, where she has a clear view of the hotel's sign, collapsed on the ground]

Lute: ♪I took this hotel, and I destroyed it. I know I could have done better. Better. Intead of letting you all down.♪

[Lilith walks over to her and places a hand on her shoulder]

Lilith: ♪ Come on, little lady, why the frown? In the last 10,000 years. You're the first gal to change this town!♪ [She stands in front of Lute and points encouragingly at her.] ♪You can do it! And even I know it! For your story has just begun! You can't quit now, hell, you owe it! There's still damage to be undone. You've changed my mind, you've touched our hearts♪

[Adam, Angel (who is still holding Fat Nuggets), Tom, Vaggie and Katie gather around the 2 of them.]

Lilith: ♪You found the good in souls gone bad. The stage is wrecked, the crowd is gone. But by God, Lute! The show, should not stop now! ♪

[Everyone else gathers around Lute, singing encouragingly]

Adam, Angel, Tom, Vaggie and Angel: ♪We can do this, we can build it. Best hotel that you've ever seen! Twice the bedrooms, we can fill them.♪

Lilith: ♪ With even more sinners than you can dream!♪

Lilith & Adam: ♪It starts with you,♪

Lilith, Adam & Katie: ♪You know it's true,♪

All: ♪Fulfill your destiny!♪

[Lute, now smiling, stands up]

Lute: ♪So long as I've got all of you with me!♪

[The scene cuts to Vaggie running around the hotel's ruins, picking up bricks]

Vaggie: ♪To build a hotel, I think we'll need some brick and lumber!♪

Lilith: ♪Good thing we're in Hell, check out this little magic trick!♪

[Lilith creates huge, neat piles of bricks. Meanwhile, Katie begins to build pillars]

Katie: ♪Start with foundation!♪

Lilith: ♪A remedial creation for me!♪

[Lilith, using Keekee in her key form as a gun, creates foundations]

Vaggie, Katie & Lilith: ♪It's as easy as it can be!♪

[The scene cuts to Lute, helping to rebuild the hotel while wiping away tears]

Lute: ♪ No time for crying, we got a lot of work to do and, We gotta try and, make the best of what's in ruins!♪

[Adam and Tom help Lute to rebuild it]

Adam: ♪New coat of paint!♪

Tom: ♪New lights across the marquee♪

[Lute uses her angelic power to light up the lightbulbs]

Lute, Adam & Tom: ♪With a little sorcery!♪

[Meanwhile, in the TOE Tower, Alastor bursts through the doors of Rosie's penthouse. Rosie and Mimzy are already there]

Alastor: ♪After that battle, masterless cattle!♪

Alastor & Rosie: ♪Overlords hanging by a thread!♪

[As they look at a board showing a mindmap of their enemies, Alastor throws a knife through an old picture of Vox. Alastor is clearly visible in the frame, but has been torn out of the picture, presumably by Alastor himself]

Alastor & Rosie: ♪With a bit of bravado, maybe tomorrow. We'll be atop the heap!♪

[Rosie and Alastor dance together while Mimzy records them, smiling]

Rosie: ♪While the rest of Hell's pissing!♪

Alastor: ♪Vox is missing!♪

Alastor & Rosie: ♪Fled with his tail between his legs! Nature abhors a power vacuum. It leaves room for you and me!♪

[Mimzy comes up behind Al and Rosie and puts her arms around the 2 of them]

Alastor & Rosie: ♪The future of Hell belongs to us now!♪

[As the three of them laugh together, the scene cuts to Vox, limping towards the ruins of his tower while holding the broken pieces of his microphone.]

Vox: ♪This place smells like death♪ [He enters his tower.] ♪There's a chill in the air. And I barely escaped being killed by a hair. "Great Vox the overlord, died for his friends". Sorry to disappoint all! But that is not where this ends! [He cuts the table with his hand.] I'm hungry for freedom, like never before♪ [He walks through his tower, his eyes darting around the room] ♪The constraints of my deal surely have a back door. Once I figure out how to unclip my wings. Guess who will be pulling all the strings?!♪ [Vox laughs maniacally as his shadow looms above him.]

[Meanwhile, back at the hotel, the rest of the hotel's residents are finishing off the rebuilding while putting up a painting of Pentious]

Lilith, Adam, Vaggie, Katie, Angel & Tom: ♪We can do this!♪

Lute: ♪We can do this!♪

Lilith, Adam, Vaggie, Katie, Angel & Tom: ♪We'll be better!♪

Lute: ♪We'll be better ♪

Lilith, Adam, Vaggie, Katie, Angel & Tom: ♪Though redemption may take a while♪

Lute: ♪Though it may take a while!♪

Lilith, Adam, Vaggie, Katie, Angel & Tom: ♪Wayward sinners, clear their ledger!♪

[Vox appears in the middle of the group before they could all hug, now recovered]

Vox: ♪And we're doing it with a smile!♪

[Everyone except for Tom and Lilith cheer and hug Vox]

Lute: Vox!

Lilith: (spoken) Oh, this guy again.

Lute: ♪We'll make a difference, wait and see!♪

Lute & Adam: ♪We're gonna do this, you and me!♪

Lute, Adam, Angel, Vox, Tom, Vaggie, Katie and Lilith: ♪And then tomorrow it will be a motherfuckin' happy day in hell!

[All of them sing the last line while looking at the rebuilt hotel. In V Tower, Alastor & Rosie make out while Mimzy takes a selfie of them.]

[In Heaven, Carmilla, Odette, and Clara are sitting in a room together. Suddenly, Husk rises up into the room. His colour scheme has been changed to his fur color being the same, but his eyes are now white, with gold pupils, and his wings became blue instead of red.]

Husk: What? Where-where am I? [He sees Carmilla, Odette & Clara.] Oh, hello.

[Clara, realising that this is proof that the Hazbin Hotel works, squeaks with excitement. Odette just stares at Husk shocked, but smiles when she sees Clara happy, but Carmilla, having come to the same conclusion as Clara, looks mortified.]

Clara: Her plan works!

[The scene cuts to the ocean waves washing the beaches in Heaven. In a beach chair, a lone woman with a huge red hat sits there, watching the sea. As her hair flows by the winds, Cherri comes to her, still flying cus of her leg being ripped off, and she dumps the deceased Pentious's halo on the ground in front of her.]

Cherri: Pentious is dead. Which means your deal is done, and I'm in charge now. Lilith's new dumb brat is threatening the very foundation of Heaven. And if you want to stay here, [She leans down and pointing at the sea.] you're going down there [She points at the woman], and stopping that bitch. You understand me...Charlotte?

[The woman, revealed to be Charlie, stared up at Cherri before she furrows her eyebrows from behind the sunglasses in annoyance.]

(Chapter ends here.)

Chapter Text

[Chapter opens in The A!Hotel. As A! Lute and A! Adam are just waking up to a loud bang outside.]

A! Adam: [Appears in the doorway with hid harpoon up and Lute behind him] The fuck is going on out here?!

A! Lute: Guys...What's going on?

A! Angel: Suddenly. Katie has regained her homophobic tendencies, so im strangling her! [He prepares to strangle Katie with all four of his arms.]

C! Katie: What the actualy fuck?!

A! Lute: Angel. Stop. That...doesn't look like Katie at all. She would never...She wouldn't even wear red and black together after the fight with Heaven.

A! Angel: Regardless. Even if she's not Katie. Then who is this bitch?!

C! Katie: Well-

A! Adam: Yeah. Who the fuck are you?!

C! Katie: Didn't the one eyed janitor kill you?

A! Adam: Who?

[Adam looks at Lute in confusion, she just shrugs.]

A! Lute: The only "cyclops" we know is Cherri Bomb, and she's a bitch, almost killed me and Adam, and that Niffty girl who works for the radio demon.

A! Adam: Still laughing at the fact their name short is "toe". Hah.

A! Lute: Yeah that's funny.

A! Katie: [She comes out of her room, yawning and rubbing her eye.] Hey gays, what's gotten you up so early- [She notices C! Katie.] Well fuck me. When did ya'll put a mirror in here? I look good.

C! Angel: That's not a mirror. That's you.

A! Katie: Oh well fuck me.

A! Vaggie: Can i stab her Lute?

A! Lute: No, Vaggie. You can't. [She leans down to Vaggie.] Atleast not yet.

[A! Lute and A! Vaggie laugh as A! Adam looks at them then at C! Katie.]

A! Adam: [He sighs in frustration.] Look. Whoever the fuck you are. And why you look like our Katie here. You ain't gonna be fucking with anyone in here. And you will DEFINITELY NOT he making homophobic remarks on ANYONE in here. Or else it won't be Vaggie stabbing you. It will be ME. Got that titty haver?

C! Katie: Pfft. As if i care what an angel boy thinks-

[Before C! Katie could finish her sentence, A! Adam puts his harpoon at her forehead, as he menacingly stares at C! Katie.]

A! Adam: Are you gonna finish that sentence? Ka-Tie?

[C! Katie just nods quickly. Meanwhile, A! Angel's phone rings.]

A! Angel: [He picks up the phone.] Heya, Boss. Sure. I'll be right over there. [He hangs up the phone.] Looks like i gotta go, my boss needs me.

A! Lute: Oh. That reminds me. I need to go with you. I need to talk to him about something important.

A! Angel: Sure, come along. Or should i say, "Cum" along?

A! Lute: [Akwardly laughs] Never say that again.

[And with that, A! Angel and A! Lute walk out.]

[The two walk on the streets, chatting and laughing, when suddenly, a pink smoke chain appears around A! Angel's neck.]

A! Angel: What the fuck?!

C! Valentino: Angel~

A! Angel: The fuck? Val?

C! Valentino: I missed you baby, why aren't you in the studio yet?~

A! Angel: The what?

A! Lute: Hey, Val. What are you doing? You usually never do this! Let him go! If this is your way of saying "pranked ya'", then it's not funny.

C! Valentino: Ooh. You brought me fresh meat? How lovely~

A! Angel: [Looks madly at him and pushes him off.] I don't know what got into you, Val, but this is weird. You're not like this. And if you think for a moment that i find this funny, then you're wrong.

C! Valentino: Oh how dare you, you- [He almost slaps him when a hand grabs Him.]

A! Val: Lay one hand on MY worker, and you're dead, other me.

C! Valentino: The fuck?

[A! Val throws his canon self away.]

A! Val: Also. Get normal glasses, bitch, glasses are hot. Yours aren't. [He turns to A! Angel.] Are you okay, Angie?

A! Angel: Im confused.

A! Lute: Me too.

A! Val: I'll tell you two everything. Now. Vamos, to my studio!

A! Lute: Actually, angel, I need to go somewhere else too, meet you back in the hotel?

A! Angel: Sure. Let's go boss.

[A! Lute walks off, and puts on headphones to listen to her favorite song, Radioactive (Yes, i love imagine dragons, so this is a thing my au Lute likes, sorry.), but as she walks, she bumps into someone.]

A! Lute: Ah, sorry. Let me help you, up- [She reaches down to help the person, but the person refuses.]

C! Vaggie: I don't need your help, Lute!

A! Lute: Vaggie? How did you grow so much?

C! Vaggie: is that a joke?! Oh you'll-

C! Charlie: Vaggie no! [She looks at A! Lute with a glare.] Why are you here?

A! Lute: What do you mean? Wait...Princess Charlie? Step-sis? I haven't seen you in ages! Where have you been? [She attempts to hug C! Charlie, but she refuses.]

C! Charlie: You're mistaking me for someone else...

A! Lute: What? But you're Charlie, right?

C! Charlie: Yes.

C! Vaggie: How is Adam doing?

A! Lute: Oh just fine! He's doing amazing, he always tells me he wants to marry me...But we always postpone it, we don't want to rush things, he gets it. I love him so much...[She hugs herself and blushes at the thought of Adam.]

C! Vaggie: What? But Niffty killed Adam...

A! Lute: What? No. Adam's very much alive. Infact. He's in my hotel. You can coms back too...By the way, really, how did you grow so much Vaggie? You were just this small. [She gestures to A! Vaggie's height, which is Canon Niffty's size in this au.] And your hair grew out? Oh, you're so pretty, but how did you lose your eye? Why does it have an X on it? Im more confused than the two Valentino's i just saw with Angel earlier. Haha.

C! Vaggie: [She leans close to C! Charlie's ear.] Is it just me or is Lute acting weird?.. She's acting like you...Alot...

?: I believe I have the explanation for everything.

[The three of them turn to look, and they see A! Lilith standing near them.]

C! Charlie: Mom...

(Chapter ends here, on a cliffhanger! Nooo!)

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins with Lute and Adam getting ready for bed. Adam takes his sleeping pills, because due to what haplened after the battke with Heaven, he couldn't sleep properly, he was scared anything will happen to Lute, or anyone in the hotel.]

Lute: Goodnight baby. I love you.

Adam: I love you too Lute. [He smiles at Lute, then looks away, slightly dropping his smile, looking sad]

Lute: Hey...It's okay...Im here for you...[She kisses Adam's head.]

Adam: What did i do to deserve you?..

[Lute giggles slightly, then covers herself with her side of the blanket. Adam does the same a short time later. Adam stirs in his sleep and even whimpers.]

[Fade into Adam's sleep.]

Adam: [Voice echoing] Hello?..Anyone?.. [He sees a shadow of Lute. And runs to her and gives her a hug.] Lute! Lutey, can you tell me where we are?

Dream! Lute: Stay away from me, Adam!

Adam: What?..

Dream! Lute: I said...[She pushes Adam off of herself] GET OFF OF ME YOU PRICK!

Adam: Ow! What the shit Lute?..

Dream! Lute: You'll NEVER be good enough for me! I should have left you in that alleyway when i had the chance! [She pushes Adam away more, and near a cliffside] You'll never stop being anything else than the man, who couldn't even have a normal wife without them leaving. When will you even love a woman without being a prude to them?! [She pushes Adam into the cliff.]

[Scared by the fall, Adam lets out a scream. But he then sees himself in the garden...Where it all began. He walks around, trying to find a way out. He is panicking like crazy, until he turns around and sees a woman with long blonde hair at the bright light, playing with an animal. It's silhouette was shadowy, but Adam could recognize that person from anywhere.]

Adam: EVE! [As he recognizes Eve, he runs toward her and hugs her, and she hugs him back. Adam cries in her dress.] Eve..! I was having a...a nightmare...a bad one...

[Adam sobs as Eve caress his face before hugging him.]

A distorted voice: This isn't a nightmare. This is what your life has become.

[Adam notices that Eve is leaving, and as Adam realizes this, he tries to reach for her, to grab her arm, to pull her back to him, but she is not stopping, Eve looks back at him one final time, she smiles at Adam, he cries desperately to grab Eve's hand.]

Adam: NO! NO, NO, NO EVE! I'M SORRY! EVE! PLEASE COME BACK! IM SORRY FOR EVERYTHING!

[A black goo hand grabs Adam's left wrist, and pulls him into the shadows slowly, Adam tries to get away, but he is pulled into the shadows, as the black goo spreads to his legs, and right arm, he is completely pulled into the dark.]

Adam: NO! [He jolts away, frightened] No!

[Adam starts breathing heavily, looking around desperately, as he sees Lute sleeping next to him peacefully, he gets out of bed and falls to the floor with a small thud, this wakes up Lute slowly, she wakes up and sees Adam rushing out of the room.]

Lute: Adam?..

[Adam runs into the bathroom, crying from his nightmare, he tries to take his sleeping pulls, but he can't find them, his hands start shaking.]

Adam: No...nonononono...Where the fuck is it?! WHERE IS IT?! [He kicks the bathtub.] Ow!<

[Lute slowly opens the bathroom door, and walks inside.]

Lute: Adam?...Adam! What's wrong?! [She saw Adam crying.] Are you okay?! What's wrong? What happened?

[Lute wants to check on Adam, but he suddenly pushes her away. He is having a mental breakdown after experiencing what nightmare he went through.]

Adam: No, no, don't touch me! I hurt everything, everyone! I make everyone's lives worse. Including yours! I don't deserve you! I don't deserve anything! I don't deserve anyone near me! I deserve death! I ruin everything!

[Adam crawls away to hide away, but Lute tries to comfort Adam.]

Lute: Not mine! Don't you dare say you deserve death! You don't. And you definitely don't ruin my life!

Adam: You should have left me in that alleyway...

Lute: I could have never! You deserve everything...[She sits down next to Adam] Do you know why i took you from the alleyway without a reason?

Adam: No?..Maybe...I don't know...

Lute: Because...

[Flashback time. A few years prior to everything. In Lilith's mansion, Lute puts some bandages on Adam, as she smiles at him. Adam smiles back at her. Adam notices her robot arm, and Lute starts showing it off. Flashback ends (Just wanted to leave this wholesome scene here.).]

Lute: Because, when i saw you all alone in that alleyway, injured, i knew i couldn't just leave you all alone, in pain. Because when i saw the pain in your eyes, i saw myself. I knew exactly the pain you felt. I would have helped you even if you weren't an angel, just an injured sinner, but when you were bleeding, in pain, without anyone to help, i helped. And the same person i helped makes me angry, sad, and happy at the same time, and now. He's my boyfriend.

Adam: You don't hate me for who i was before?

Lute: Why would i? I was the same...Well, sort of the same. You gave me so much, love, friends, a family, and maybe our own family later on...Who knows? We might just make Lilith into a step-grandmother.

Adam: [He chuckles and hugs Lute tightly to himself.] Thanks...Lute...

Lute: [She hugs him back.] Now come on. I think it's time you stop taking those sleeping pills, you can sleep while you hug me. Okay?

Adam: Okay...

[Lute stands up and helps Adam up as well, they walk back to their bedroom. And Lute looks thru her drawer.]

Adam: What are you looking for?

Lute: Something to help you sleep. Ah. There it is. [She pulls out a sleeping mask, that has the words "Hell's No.1 fallen angel" with a yellow smiley face, and with a thumbs up.] Thought you could use it. The words fit you so well.

[Adam takes the mask and smiles. The two get back into bed, and they kiss each other, shortly after, Lute goes back to sleep, Adam puts on the mask and lays back, and falls asleep.]

[Chapter ends here.]

Chapter Text

[Chapter opens with Adam holding his baby.]

Lute: You sure you can handle it?

Adam: Duh. Im THE first man. I have descendants all over the hotel. I can raise another baby.

Lute: Okay. Just...Leave a voicemail if anything haplens. [Lute is passes out, and starts sleeping on their bed. No matter what Adam will do, Lute won't wake up to anything, not even to an atomic explosion.]

Adam: Damn it...Oh well. [He holds up his daughter, who sticks her rounge out.] Guess i'll babysit you. Okay? But after this, your first word better be "daddy"

[Aurora just giggles at Adam and claps her hands together, which causes Adam to chuckle.]

Adam: Knew i could count on you. Now let's feed you.

[Adam sets her down on her highchair, and walks into the kitchen.]

Adam: Bottle...Hmm...Ah. There. [He takes out the bottle of milk and walks out to feed his daughter.] Awww...Okay...Ew. [He picks her up again and brings her to the changing mat.] Okay...[He turns around, but doesn't see his kiddo anywhere. He takes out his phone.]

Lute's Voicemail: Heya, it's Lute, you know what to do...Also, Katie, for fuck's sake, don't fill up my voicemail with dumb shit-[Beep.]

Adam: Heya, Honey. Do you remember our daughter? Well, she's no longer. [He laughs and ends the call. And hefinds Her on the couch.[ Baby. You don't teleport. Now. Sleep time. [He carries her up to her room and into her crib.] What? You want me to tell you a story? Okay...Uh...Oh. How about a song?

[Aurora giggles at the idea of a song.]

Adam: Okay. But i gotta warn you. Im amazing at singing. [He holds her up one more time and takes a breath.] 🎵Go to sleep! Go to sleep! Don't scream and cry! Go to sleep!🎵

[At that, Aurora begins laughing and claps.]

Adam: I know im amazing. [He puts her in her crib. But she jumps out.] Aw man...Did your momy feed you cocaine? [He chases his daughter all around. But he can't find her. He walks to the lobby, and sees his baby tying up Tom and Katie.]

Katie: Maan. Knew i'd be sacrificed.

Tom: I had to wake up for this?

Adam: Baby! [He picks up Aurora.] You don't sacrifice the guests of the Hotel! Bad baby! [He freezes when Aurora starts crying] Oh, no, don't cry baby...Im sorry. Wanna go olay with the big girl?

[Adam places Aurora on Vaggie's head.]

Vaggie: Whe?

Adam: She's sad. Cheer her up.

Vaggie: Oh. Okay! [She takes Aurora and Walks outside] You did great. If it wasn't for Adam, you would have nailed the sacrifice. But, tonigh. I'll show you how to end a Pest!

Adam: So it was you!

Vaggie: What? Who was me?

Adam: [So gracefully takes back the child he loves so much] Go back inside. And don't you dare try to teach her anything. [He walks back inside the Hotel]

Vaggie: Okay. [She skips back inside thr hotel as well]

Adam: Okay. Anyone that touches my baby girl will get a slap. [He walks back to their room and puts her down to her crib, she's finally asleep] Great. Now. Papa needs some rest too. [He goes into bed and puts on his mask and sleeps]

[Later the next morning, Lute stretches her arm, cus she takes down her robo-arm cus she feels uncomfortable sleeping with it on. And pulls out her phone as it starts buzzing.]

Lute: What? [She listens to the voicemails Adam left her last night] ADAM!

Adam: Wha-?

[Chapter with the goofiest ending yet, ends here.]

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins where the last chapter left off.]

C! Charlie: Mom...You...You're here. I missed you!

A! Lilith: Im sorry dear. But im not the mother you're looking to find. Let me esplain all of it. But for that. I need you three to come to Lute's hotel.

C! Vaggie: Lute and Hotel are two words that would never fit in a sentence. Unless it's: "Lute wants to destroy the hotel" or-

A! Lilith: Let's go and you'll find out everything.

[A few moments later. The four of them arrive in the Hotel, but they see a sight only in. A! Vaggie's dreams.]

A! Vaggie: Toss the flame!

[What's the sight? Well, the swapped au people tied up Canon Katie to a chair. And are holding up torches.]

A! Lute: What's going on?

A! Adam: Oh shit...Hey Lute...Uh...Fuck..What to say?..uh...This isn't what it looks like?..

A! Lute: Guys. No. You are not witch burning her.

A! Vaggie: But we wanna.

A! Lute: Vaggie. No. Put those down into the water. And untie her.

A! Angel: Ugh. Fine...

A! Adam: Sorry about this Lute...They kinda got me...Oh, Hey taller Vaggie.

[As everyone hears him, they all look shocked and look at canon Charlie and Vaggie.]

C! Charlie: Oh...Hi...

A! Vaggie: Woooow. I look so tall. Why can't i be tall like that?.. [She pouts and A! Katie pats her head.]

A! Katie: You'll maybe one day become tall.

A! Vaggie: And her hair...So long...Mine is short...I like mine better...

C! Charlie: Im so confused...

A! Katie: Im kinda too...Oh well. Time for drinks. Tom. Hand one over.

[A! Tom throws a bottle at A! Katie who catches it easily. And downs the bottle. Suddenly, the doors to the hotel open. And Charlie instantly turns angry when she sees who it is.]

A! Valentino: Hello babies, gays, guys, girls, and everything inbetween. [He gets a punch in the face by Charlie] Ow! What the fuck?

C! Charlie: You bastard. Daring showing your face here?! [She almost goes full demon, and tries to attack her but C! Vaggie holds her back.]

A! Valentino: What? I haven't even done anything!

A! Lute: Uncle Val!

A! Valentino: Luella!

[The two hug as they see each other, with a satisfied "hmm" sound.]

C! Charlie: Wait what?

A! Lilith: i'll explain. I know everything from a certain...somebody.

A! Adam: And who?

A! Lilith: Just the old friend...Roo.

A! Lute: Root of all things evil? The incarnation of bad things?!

A! Lilith: Yes. Infact. In any world. Roo, stays the root of evil. No matter the universe....You see. These two here, [She gestures to Canon Charlie & Vaggie] are from a different world, one where Charlie runs the hotel to rehab sinners. And Vaggie here is her girlfriend. Unlike in our world. She is a fallen angel.

A! Vaggie: Woah.

A! Lilith: Their world's Lute & Adam are evil. They lead the exorcists. To keep it simple. Vox, Val, and Velvette run a studio together like our worlds Alastor, Mimzy and Rosie. Etc. Etc. Blah Blah blah. Boring stuff. Anywho. To keep it simple. Charlie and Vaggie there, aren't evil, they run the hotel. Their Sir Pentious and Cherri Bomb aren't evil either. Katie's a homophobe, Tom's a submissive idiot to Katie. Valentino in their world is a prickass BITCH, their Velvette is a phone addict, And Vox is the leader. And their world's Alastor is helpful to Charlie and HER world's hotel. And Rosie's nice. Mimzy...In their world is a greedy bastard.

A! Katie: That doesn't change. She's a greedy bitch here too.

A! Tom: Yeah. That checks out.

A! Katie: What? The part that you are a bottom?

A! Tom: No. Im not!

A! Katie: But you are a bottom~ [She walks off.]

A! Tom: [He sighs] Yeah...

A! Vaggie: Woah. That's actually cool! Other me was an angel? How did you lose your eye?

C! Vaggie: Long story...

A! Lilith: Their world's Lute gouged her eye out because she spared a child...

A! Adam: What?

A! Lute: [She is extremely shocked.] Oh my gosh..I am so so sorry for that. I know i didn't exactly do it...But im still so sorry...You understand me? Im sorry for what the other me did to you.

A! Valentino: Well...That happened. Anyways. I brought back Angel. Such a sweet performance you did earlier. And i just wanted to drop back in here to say bye to everyone. [He pats A! Angel's head.]

A! Angel: Stop. You're embarassing me.

C! Charlie: Wait...So your Val is sweet like Rosie?

A! Lute: Yeah. He's uncle Val. Owner of the downtown, and the porn studio. His workers aren't always the nicest. But they're nice. Alot of them. Matter of fact. They're cool. Except for Travis.

A! Valentino: Ugh. Travis.

C! Vaggie: You mean the guy who wants to fuck our Angel all the time?

A! Valentino: Your Travis wants that too? Man. Fuck that guy. I certainly would, but only if he wants to. Consent is everything. [He motions a rainbow happily]

C! Vaggie: Never seen, or heard Valentino of all people saying "fuck someone" and "with consent" in the same sentence.

A! Adam: Seems like your worlds Valentino is really, REALLY a prick. Also. You two are dating? Amazing. Cool. Very nice. Really. I support it. Cool.

C! Charlie: Oh...thanks? I guess?...

A! Lute: Don't worry. He gets like this anytime he's in the presence of a couple other us.

C! Charlie: That's not that much of a problem. I can understand why.

A! Lilith: Well. Let's get these two a room. Until we figure out how they got here and why, and also how they can return home safely. Vaggie, be a dear. Get them a room.

A! Vaggie: Okay Queen. [She runs off to get keys to the room, and C! Charlie and C! Vaggie follow her]

A! Katie: Soo. [She turns to A! Valentino] How are things downtown big guy?

[Chapter ends here.]

Chapter Text

So i just thought of doing a Q&A for this fanfic. And you might ask.

"Why tho? Why do this?"

Cus im bored. And i have no idea what chapter to write. Sooo, if you readers want, you can leave some questions here.
And if there ARE questions, i'll answer them. In a 🌈FUUUN🌈 way.

And for fun, you can ask the characters (I "stole" this idea from another fanfic i saw. Also, there are MANY fanfics with this.)

Soo. Just leave your questions here. Anyways...
....
And im going back to writing the next chapter until then.

Chapter Text

1. Costume game:

Lute: I love you, Adam....But you're not mine...

[Adam falls to his knees, crying.]

Adam: Luteeee! Let's play a different costume gameeeee! This one huuuurts!

Lute: Alright.

2. Tv, a doll and a Moth.

Vox: Sooo. How' it goin', Velvette?

Velvette: Mine own aft'rlife is v'ry well. What about thee and thy moth boyfriend?

Vox: Oh it's going well. Im still the top.

Velvette: The top?

Vox: It's nothing much. Means that i wear the pants in this relationship.

Valentino: OYE!

3. Carmilla meets Zestial.

Clara: Wow! Hell's so weird and red! A weird green eyed demon!

Carmilla: [She pulls Clara behind her.] Where?! [She notices Zestial.] Oh...

Clara: Look! Lute! [She rushes and hugs Lute.] Heya!

[Carmilla walks to Zestial]

Carmilla: Hello demon.

Zestial: The fuck is you supposed to be?

Carmilla: Excuse me? You're speaking to the head seraphim!

Zestial: Your "SeRaPhIm" status here doesn't matter.

Carmilla: And you're a pathetic ugly demon!

Zestial: You're a bright eyesore bitch!

Carmilla: And YOU'RE a sloppy, dumbass spider!

[With each sentence, both of them get closer to each other. And they suddenly kiss. And everyone's jaws drop to the floor]

Zeezi: Ho-ly Shit! [She snaps a photo of it.]

Clara: Wow!

Odette: Mom? And a demon guy?...Not that bad...Could have been worse.

4. Singing in the shower.

Lute: Of course i sing in the shower. Who wouldn't?

Tom: I don't.

Lute: Well doesn't matter.

Vaggie: I sing too!

Lute: Really?

Vaggie: Yeah!

Adam: I don't wanna tell.

Lute: Come on sweetie, tell it. Come oonnnn!

Adam: Fine...I sing in the shower too.

Katie: I don't. Cus singing is cringe.

[Tom replays the clip of them singing "loser baby" together]

Katie: Touché gas mask...

Angel Dust: Yes and no. My simple answer.

Vox: I don't. Shower.

Adam: What the fuck?

Vox: Im a TV. I'll get elecrocuted. And i'll die, and you guys would have to wait about 30 minutes for me to pull myself back together.

Vaggie: He got a point tho.

Lute: Yeaaahhh...Okay. That wraps everything up.

5. How is Husk doing?

Husk: [He's crying in the room Carmilla gave to him.] My kitties! My kittens! I want my babies back!

Clara: It's okay...Hey. Here.

[Clara pulls out a baby kitten out of nowhere. And this causes Husk to gasp and hug the kitten]

Husk: Come to dad. [He hugs the cat more] I'll take care of you.

Clara: Aww. That's sweet.

6. Crystals.

Katie: Heya. Do you wanna do some crystal meth?

Tom: The fuck?

Katie: I asked, do you wanna do some simple math?

Tom: Okay?

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins in the hotel with Adam pacing around the lobby.]

[Adam was getting the entire place ready for the welcome party for the baby. He sets up a banner saying "Welcome home baby"]

Adam: Alright...[He turns at the others.] Let's get this place as ready as we can get it ready.

Angel Dust: We're getting this place as ready as fast as we can!

Tom: So don't orde rus around!

Adam: Im in charge as long as Lute's in the hospital!

[Vaggie runs around the lobby, cleaning the entire place, and making the place baby proof.]

Katie: Guys...She kinda...snorted up my cocaine stash...And now she's doing this...

Adam: KATIE!!!

Vaggie: [She giggles and laughs like a maniac while cleaning]

Tom: I am scared of her...

Katie: Shhh...Don't be.

Vox: Oh trust me, my darling, you don't want to know.

[Vox catches Vaggie as she jumps around everywhere, and holds her as she looks like a rabid animal]

Adam: Alright. Excellent work everyone! By the time my little baby girl arrives into thid place. This hotel will be a baby proof hotel! I ca not believe it! Im gonna be a dad...Again! [He takes out his list of things] Alright...Clean hotel...Perfect windows. Baby proof hotel. Things are perfect. [He looks at the hotel] As perfect as they can be...[He pulls out his phone as someone is calling him.] Hello?

Lilith: THIS IS BAD! ADAM! YOU GOTTA COME QUICK! YOUR BABY IS COMING EARLY!

Adam: SAY WHAT?! [He throws down his list and runs out.]

[Adam cut the back of his shirt, and his wings appeared, and he flew right out of the hotel and into the elvator system.]

Elevator system worker: Sorry Sir. Only hellborns can-

Adam: FUCK YOU! IM THE FIRST FUCKING MAN! SO LET ME THROUGH BEFORE I FUCKING END YOUR LIFE! SO LET ME INTO THE SLOTH RING!

Elevator system worker: R-Right this way sir...

Adam: Hang on, my baby...Daddy's coming! [He flies right into the sloth ring elevator]

[Several minutes later. Adam pretty much broke the doors of the elvator, and flew into the hospital, and broke the doors down.]

Adam: Where is Lute Morningstar?!

Receptionist: Delivery room 15, but you have to wait to get to the waiting list. And-

[Adam grabs the woman by the collar of her uniform.]

Adam: Listen here you cocksucker! Im gonna kill you if you put me on a waiting list! [He rushed to the room 15.] There it is! [He shouted as he slid to a halt before delivery room 15 and burst into the room.]

Lute: RAAAAAAAAAAH!

Adam: Lute! It's okay!

Lute: DON'T TELL ME TO BE OKAY ADAM! [She continued screaming. She grabbed onto the bedframe as she held onto Lilith's hand with her other hand.] I'LL FUCKING KILL SOMEONE!

Lilith: [In pain as Lute's grabbing her hand] She's been like this for hours! The doctors tried everything!

Adam: Lute, sweetie, I get you're in pain but you have to calm down so the doctors can do their job.

Lute: [She looks at Adam with anger in her eyes.] DON'T TOUCH ME OR I WILL MAKE SURE YOUR BALL SACK IS IN YOUR MOUTH!!!

Adam: This isn't the normal Lute...Lilith...Were you like this while giving birth?!

Lilith: Y-Yes...[She fell onto the floor while clutching her arm in pain]

Adam: Lute...Everything will be okay.

Lute: YOU! YOU DID THIS TO ME! YOU PUT THIS BABY INSIDE OF ME! YOU ASS!

Adam: I uh...I know I did but I didn't know we could have a kid...

Lute: THAT'S YOUR EXCUSE?! YOU SHOULD HAVE PULLED OUT!

[Lilith stands up as touches Lute's head. And this causes Lute to smile in a loopy way.]

Lute: Everything's so spinnyyyyy...

Adam: Hi babe...How're you feeling?

Lute: Goooood...

Adam: Glad to know.

Lilith: Okay, since she's calm now, I think the doctors can continue their job.

Lute: Okay...

[The doctor moved back to Lute and started doing their jobs..]

[And after about 5 hours of Lute screaming, yelling, cursing, and causing pain to Lilith's hand, the delivery was complete]

Doctor: Congratulations, Mrs. Morningstar!

[The doctor holds up the baby, and let me just say it, she is beyond tiny. But the baby is crying super loudly.]

Lute: B-Baby...G-Give her to me...

[The dorctor gave the baby to Lute. Which she took with shaking hands. Lute cradled the baby gently.]

Doctor: Congratulations. It's a girl.

[Lute took in the baby's appearance, she had Adam's skin tone with a small amount of hair, Lute knew the baby has her hair.]

Lute: She's...She's so perfect. [She hugs the baby carefully. Then bursts out in tears.] My babyyy!

Adam: [Pats Lute's back carefully] There there...it's okay...It's all gonna be okay now...She is perfect like you...

Doctor: What is the name gonna be?

Lute: Aurora...

Adam: I told you the name will be perfect too.

[Chapter ends here.]

Chapter Text

Sooo. Had to collect some questions first. Some of these are comments, some i already answered, but i thought i'd answer them in a bit more detail than i did in the comment section. Or some of the questions here are from my friends who also read the story, or i tell them chapter ideas, and hear their opinions, and they can ask questions. So without further ado. Let's begiiin. *Magic whoosh sounds.*

Im doing this in aaaa...Podcast style answer.

Alright. Question 1. This is from an earlier chapter. And they asked. "Does Charlie exist in this au?" Yes. She does. But as you saw from the "Finale" of Season 1, not really the finale, im still in season 1 of this fanfic, she swaps with Lilith, meaning i'll have to think of ALOT of stuff when Canon Lilith appears in the Show.

Question 2 is from my friend. And their question was "Why Lute taking Charlie's place?" Cus why not? I thought it'd be fun to make the villains the good guys, with a little spicy stuff~. And mainly cus i listened to that song with the lyrics "What if the bad guy wasn't the bad guy." And it just popped in. And i made some twists and turns, and cutting, and ended up here.

Another commenter asked. I will quote: "what inspired you to make this story? was it you wanting to make a story or were you inspired to make your own by reading someone else's?" Both in some ways. I always read fanfics about swap au's, and i made my own fairshare of swap au's, both Hazbin Hotel, Helluva Boss, The owl house, Amphibia, Star Vs. The Forces of evil, Tokyo Mew Mew (both old AND new) etc. Etc. And i saw a swap au on tiktok that featured some stuff here on this fanfic, this was before i even published this story. And it gave me some ideas, so i worked on it to make it more original and not seem like a blatant copy of that person's au. And yes. I wanted to make this story, and i had a different au in mind, one where the angels in the show take the main cast's roles, and in a way, that stuck in here too.

Another question by the same commenter is to Adam, i'll make it shorter and simpleler.: "If you could, would you go back in time to fix everything, so that your descendants can live in the garden?" Let me get Adam. *Walks out gracefully as if i haven't delayed this Q&A for like...4-5 chapters.*

Adam: [Singing to Lute.] 🎶Im a genie in a bottle baby. You gotta rub me the right waaay.🎶

Lute: wow...Shouldn't i sing that song to you?

Adam: Nope. You could never sing omething like that. Right?

Lute: You don't know anything~

Adam: Aww.

Okay, Adam. That's enough. Come on.

Adam: Nooo!

Now answer.

Adam: Fine...I don't even know if i would...On one hand, it would fix everything, but on the other hand, maybe Lute would still be born, i think, and me and Lilith would still be together, Lucifer wouldn't have fallen, but i wouldn't have met Eve...Ugh. I don't know. Maybe i would fix everything to make billions of people not suffer anymore, i would...

Lute: Aww. Baby. You're so selfless. [She hugs Adam] That's why i love you.

Alright. Next one. "Vox what is the real plan on why are you at the hotel?" Hmm...

Vox: I am not planning anything darlings, im just enjoying the show. [He grins]

Oh, next one to Katie and Tom. Ooh. "Tom, Katie, when are you gonna both finally admit you are inlove with each other and confess?!"

Tom: What are you talking about?

Katie: Yeah. We aren't inlove!

Vaggie: They so are.

Angel Dust: Yup. They are.

Katie: We're so not.

Vaggie: You are.

Tom: I mean...[He whispers to Vaggie] She IS hot.

Angel Dust: I KNEW IT!

Moving on from that. Next to Alastor and Rosie. "Alastor, Rosie, how is your relationship going? Who is the real top in this relationship?"

Alastor: Obviously, the top is me. Tho we don't do the "sex" thing nowadays.

Rosie: He's still an ace in the hole. So now, we only makeout, until he figures out what gender he's attracted to...Also he's lying about being the top. He needed a BDSM book guide when we first did it.

Mimzy: Maaan, what did i miss out on?

Next question: "Lilith, how did your motherly relationship with Lute begin and why did you just choose to not interact with her that much?"

Lilith: Well...Once, we had a fall out, a HUGE arguement, and after that...I didn't think she'd wanna see me ever again. So when she called to invite me over. I thought i would make things right! And it all started when i saw a little baby angel in Hell, and decided to take care of her, until an angel noticed and came to pick her up. And i got so attached to that same baby, that i had hoped she fell from Heaven so i could take care of her for all eternity...And now that im saying this, i seem like a prick.

Lute: No you're not. You're a good mom.

Lilith: Thank you so much, Lute.

Aww. Now. Next one.

Lute: Way to ruin the mood.

"Lute, what do you think of your step mother Lilith and step sister Charlotte? Say your real thoughts of them, not the nice ones but the your ACTUAL thoughts of the both of them?"

Lute: I think Lilith is a good mom, but not the nicest person in general. Heh, once, she pulled a karen cus i didn't get the right order in WackDonalds. And Charlotte...Well...Charlie's a bit...How do i say this without insulting her?..A bitch alot of times. She was an ass lots of times when i met her. And she hated when we called her "Charlie", and always said i'll never be really family.

(Au meets the Canon answer of Lute: The OTHER version of Charlie was much sweeter than the one we have here. She's better than our Charlie, that's for sure.)

Neext question. "Charlotte what was the deal you made to get to heaven and why?"

Charlotte: A simple question with a simple answer.

(This is a spoiler. So i cannot reveal it yet. Buut. You'll see it in a chapter, specifically, 2 chapters after this one.)

Question number whatever. "What would Lute and Adam actually fight about? argue in such way to make them stay away from each other for at least a day before apologising?"

Lute: About...If Aurora is an actually good name for a baby we might have...

Adam: I keep telling her that it's a good name for a daughter.

Lute: Yeah. But it's a name for a human, or an angel.

Adam: Our kid WOULD be an angel!

Lute: Im just worried she'll get bullied for the name "Aurora", and the boy name you suggested is actually good if he ever have a son.

Adam: How is Wilhelm a better name? I get it is a good name for a boy. But how is it better than Aurora?

Lute: Look. That's not what i literally said-

Adam: We argue about a baby name. And we always will.

Lute: Yeah. That's the ONE thing we cannot EVER agree on, even if the baby is born. I would be worried if the sinners, or hellborns would bully our kid for the name they will have...

Adam: They won't be bullied!

Lute: What if they will be?!

Next up. "Lilith what is your opinion of Adam currently and do you approve of him and Lute dating?"

Lilith: I think it's cute they are so happy. I don't mind that my kiddo is dating my ex husband.

[About 24 hours later.]

[Adam closes the fridge door tired from waking up and Lilith is standing next to him.]

Lilith: Hurt her, or make her feel bad, and you DIE!

Ookay. Onto the next one. This one was from my friend asking me "What caused Lute to fall from Heaven?" Weeell...Sensitive topic for Lute. And i wanted a chapter to reveal that. But i couldn't make that idea make sense so that you readers don't get confused. But she fell from Heaven because the elder angels thought her idea of "going down to earth to convince people that they can be better if they try" is a bad idea. Especially since she aas a small little 5 year old.

Lute: Which i don't understand! There are MANY good humans up there. Hence why Heaven has so many angels too!

Point is. She tried to go down to Earth and try to convince humans that weren't so good to become good. And when the elder angels found out that she has done this multiple times, they eventually kicked her out of Heaven.

Lute: Wasn't it right to do? I tried to help. And yet they threw me out...Tho it wasn't their fault that i lost my arm. It was my own fault.

Another question to Lute: "Lute what was it like being raised by Lilith?"

Lute: Well...A bumpy ride. For one, she always got a baysitter for me. Cus i could never be left alone for more than 3 hours. Still...Anyways. She was a...Unique mom. I got to meet Charlie. Tho i never really met Lucifer. I only saw him once. And he was crying for some reasons.

Nooowww...The next question. Also from a friend i have: "Who are the most important person to you?"

Lute: Everyone...But mostly Mom and Adam.

Adam: Lute...Of course. And now, Lilith too. But i'd kill anyone who hurts the hotel's residents.

Angel Dust: Husk...And Katie too...I wish i could tell Husky how much i actually love him...Maybe someday...

Vaggie: There are alot of people i care about. But mostly Vox. And Lute! She's like my sister that i somehow think is in another universe!

Vox: Ohooo. My babe Valentino! And my daughter.

Lute: Who?

Vox: Vaggie. DUH. And in a way, Velvette is important to me too. For some reason, i think she is in a different timeline.

Katie: Angel's my bestie. Of course i care about him.

Someone's missing from that list.

Katie: Fineee. Tom too.

Tom: Katie's a good friend now. She's cool now.

[Meanwhile in Heaven.]

Clara: Mom and Odette are the BEST most important people to me! And Husk too. He's the first redeemed soul. He deserves love!

Odette: Clara and Mom. I don't care about anyone else. And until that cat proves he's a good soul. Im not trusting him...

Cherri: The ONE person i TRULY care about is DEAD!

Husk: Angel Dust. And My kitten babies! I miss them...[He hugs the cat Clara gave him.]

Alriiighttt...Next one. Again to Alastor. "Alastor what was it that made you fall in love with Rosie? And what your favorite thing about her?"

Alastor: Her personality. I mean come on. Look at her. Such a woman. And she has alot of stomach. She once ate the knee of an imp that tried to harass Mimzy.

Rosie: Alastor. Always such a charmer.

Next question goes to Charlie: "Charlotte what is your end goal?"

Charlotte: [She sips her drink] In due time, dear. I can't just reveal everything. That would foil my plans~.

Charlie, don't be-Whatever. Next: "Adam what was Eve like?"

Adam: She was a good woman...I sometimes still miss her...Lute remind me of her sometimes. Only sometimes. Eve was alot of things. She was good with animals too....Now throw the other question.

"Did you ever meet Cain when you were still in charge of the exterminations? And did you kill him during one or no?"

[Adam simply freezes at that]

Adam: O-Oh...Well...No. I could never kill him. I went down multiple times during exterminations, or BEFORE exterminations to keep him safe. He was one of the reasons i wanted this whole thing to stop...It brings me joy to know he's still alive right now. Tho we don't talk or visit each other anymore. Even if he killed Abel...

Lute: Im sure he'll want to see you someday.

Adam: It has been thousands, if not millions of years.

Next one is to me..."What is your most favorite Hazbin Hotel Adam Fic?"

I wouldn't say i have a favorite. I love alot of them, i don't really have a favorite. Heh.

Next one to Tom. Our darling gas mask.

Tom: Only Katie can call me that.

"What do you like most about Katie?"

Tom: Well...Her singing voice. Her personality. That she finally opened up to me that one time. Hasn't done that again yet. And sometimes her jokes.

Aww. Now a question for the twig waisted lady-I mean, a happy lady! Katieeee: "What do you like the most about Tom and not in a sexual way?"

Katie: His hair. His smile, cus i once saw it. His singing voice. His personality. His attitude. The way he can mix any alcohol and still make it taste good.

Angel Dust: You sure you don't like him?

Katie: Absolute not, im not in love. Love is cringe.

And now, most likely last question of this Q&A. This question is also from a friend of mine who just started watching Hazbin and knows about this fanfic: "How will Season 2, 3, 4 happen?"

Maybe i'll write my own season 2, and work something out when the show's season 2 comes out to make it make sense, although. You might ask "'How?! The story's name is literally "a messy au". Well, i'll just have to figure it out. Lol.

Anyways, anywho, my beautiful and handsome fans, that wraps EVERYTHING up, might do a second Q&A, but i don't know when that will happen, cus i have a few chapters in mind already. Soo. Until then...

Chapter Text

[Chapter opens in the hotel. Lute stands infront of the group.]

Lute: Soo. I have an announcment to make...Well, two actually. Not even Adam knows it.

Katie: What? She didn't tell you anythin'?

Vaggie: But she tells you everything...What happened? Did you guys break up?

Adam: No. We did not. We're not breaking up.

Lute: My good news is...We're going...To Earth!

[Everyone looks at Lute if she's crazy. And they just blink.]

Tom: Uhm...You realize that...We're dead. We can't go to the living world? Only hellborns and fallen angels can?

Lute: Well, Lilith gave us the nod of approval. Here's proof. [She takes out a stamp with Lilith's fave on it as she gives a thumbs up, with the words "Hell Queen approves, don't say no bitch" around it] It's so cool. And she even gave me a temporary Asmodean Crystal to go to Earth, and back down here. It's only temporary, cus she can't exactly jus tgive it to us, it's hers, she got it from Asmodeus as a gift.

Vaggie: Woaaah...I gotta tell Vox. [She runs off happily.]

Lute: Take care Vaggie!

Adam: Honey, are you sure about this? I mean. I haven't been on Earth for...thousands of years! You were never even on Earth, and the others...Well...Huh. They seem happy about it...But im not sure if we'll-

Lute: Im sure we'll enjoy things. You guys need this after the whole battle thing.

[A few minutes later, Vaggie is pulling Vox into the room.]

Vox: What is all of this about?

Lute: Oh fuck, Vox. Yeah. We are going up to the living world. And we even got human disguises. Didn't Vaggie tell you?

Vox: No. All she said was "Vox, come quick", then pulled me out of my room by my arm, she tried my leg, but it didn't work.

Lute: Oh. Well that's okay. Now you know about this, and you are coming with us. And im not gonna be taking no for an answer.

Vox: Alright. I'll go too.

Lute: Yayy!

Adam: Im still not sure...

Lute: It'll be alright Adam, im sure of it. Cheer up. We'll go up there, check out a city, and be out of there like a flash. It will be nice...

Adam: [He sighs, not wanting to say no to the love of his life] Fine. I'll go as well.

Lute: Yay!

Vaggie: When are we going?

Lute: Tomorrow. At 6 in the morning.

Katie: Why the fuck that early?

Lute: Well, i heard humans nowadays have to wake up early.

Katie: Yeah. Especially students. Poor kids and teens.

Lute: Yeah...Anyways. Pack your stuff, we'll be on Earth for a week. So pack your jammies.

Adam: I love when she talks like that.

[The next day, everyone is ready to go.]

Lute: Oooh. I can't believe im using this for the first time! [She uses the crystal to open a portal, and she looks thru it] Woah. Look at all the trees! [She steps through as everyone else follows her] They're so colorful!

Angel Dust: Probably cus it's fall.

Lute: Wow! So pretty!

[Vaggie tries to run off, but Katie picks her up]

Katie: Not going anywhere tiny.

Vaggie: Ah fuck!

Lute: Who taught Vaggie how to cuss?! Nevermind. Let's go check into our hotel rooms. And let's go have somd fuuuun!

[A little while later, Adam puts everyone's bags down]

Katie: Do we have rules?

Lute: Yes. First off. No wandering off from the group. We can go to bars, but only if we stay together. Vox: That's a very good point. [Everyone nodded in agreement and looked at Lute, waiting for any more rules she might have.] Lute: Okay, second rule, everyone stays in human disguises. [She looked at the group, making sure everyone was understanding and agreeing.] We don't want anyone to panic seeing demons walking around. Lute: It's for our own safety and the safety of the living humans around here.

Vaggie: Sooo...Does that mean no killing or causing chaos?

Lute: Exactly. We're just up here for fun, to take a break and have a little vacation. We earned it. We're not here to cause trouble. And if we do. Lilith will NEVER allow us back here. It took me WAY too much time, effort, and convincing mom to let us here.

Katie: And what if someone pisses us off?

Lute: If someone pisses us off, we walk away, okay? We try and deescalate the situation. We're gonna be in human disguises. So, you gotta act like it, okay?

Katie: Alright fineee...But what if-

Adam: We are NOT killing anyone.

Vaggie: Damn it...

Lute: And the last rule, this is THE most important rule...no getting super drunk. We don't wanna get a hangover while we're up here. And that gors mostly to you Tom.

Tom: Hey!...Fair enough...

Adam: That rule will be broken eventually. You know, especially Tom and Angel.

Lute: Yeah, you're right...But...Just pleaseee. Guys. DON'T break the rules!

Tom: No promises. But fine.

Vox: They're gonna get so drunk. I can already see it.

Lute: We can take care of them! I know it! They'll behave!

Vox: Great!

Adam: You'll be the babysitter.

Vox: Excuse me?

Adam: You heard me.

Lute: Let's go eat now. We can order pizza.

Vaggie: I want some!

Angel Dust: Hell yeah!

Vaggie: I want pineapple pizza!

Angel Dust: You're no longer my friend.

Vaggie: Why not?

Katie: You don't say pineapple pizza infront of an italian.

Vaggie: Oh...

Lute: I'll go get everyone their pizza. It won't be too long. Adam, come on.

Adam: I'll be there in a minute. Wish i was allowed to bring my harpoon here.

Lute: But you can't, all you can have right now is a pocket knife. [She hands Adam his brand new, shiny golden cased pocket knife!]

Adam: Thanks baby.

[Lute walks out of the room and into the lobby. She sits down on a couch in the lobby as she waits for Adam, and a man sits down next to her]

Lute: Oh, hello sir!

Man: Hello doll.

Lute: I don't like being called that...

Man: Why not? Are you shy?

Lute: No. I just don't like being called that. Makes me feel weird-

Man: I can make that feeling go away.

[The man slowly reacher to touch her boob, but a hand grabs him by the face.]

Vox: I advise you stay away from her. If you value your life.

Man: And who are you? Her boyfriend?

Adam: No. But i am! [He takes out his knife.]

[Vox drops the Man as he runs off after seeing the knife]

Lute: Thanks guys...But how did you know?

[Adam points at the cameras.]

Lute: oooh...Right...Vox and cameras. Ookay...I remember now.

Adam: Now let's go get those bitches those pizzas they want.

Lute: Yeah! Vox. Come along as well. We might need a thrid to carry those boxes. Haha.

Vox: Alright.

Adam: A question, sweetie. Who's gonna watch over the others?

Lute: Oh...Shit. I didn't think that through. [A few seconds of intense thinking.] Oh. I know! The most responsible of those guys is most likely Katie and Tom right now. We could ask them to watch over the others.

Adam: Seriously? Tom and Katie? The depresso espresso duo?

Lute: Worth a shot.

[The three walk out of the hotel, and out into the city streets...yayyy...]

Lute: [She waves to people around] Hello ma'am! Good afternoon sir!

Adam: Lute. You don't have to say hi or hello to everyone.

Lute: But you know i love to do that!

[Adam and Vox roll their eyes at Lute's overly friendly behaviour and waves to strangers.]

Vox: You're gonna end up talking to someone sketchy again, dear.

Lute: Oh hush it, Vox, i can handle it!

Adam: Reminder that a man literally tried to touch you in a not apropriate way.

Lute: I know but...Nevermind.

Adam: I swear, when she gets overly friendly, she always attracts attention from the wrong people.

Vox: Exactly, dear first man. This might be like that dude she was just talking to in the lobby. Seemed real friendly than turned out to be a freak.

Adam: Yes...But Lute's too innocent to see when people have ill intentions. She sees the good in others.

[Vox shakes his head in agreement. Which is rare, considering he's talking to Adam.]

Vox: Seriously. One of these days, someone is gonna take advantage of her good-naturedness. Especially now that we're on Earth.

Lute: I wonder how the others are doing?

[Cut back to the hoteeeeelll (cliché cutaway timmeeee).]

[Tom, Katie, and Angel are sprawled out on the floor, watching a horror movie.]

Tom: This is boring.

Katie: You were literally just saying how much you missed scary movies.

Tom: I changed my mind.

Angel Dust: Oh shush. You two love watching those damn horror movies.

[Vaggie runs around the hotel trying to steal the brooms, and cleaning suplies from the staff as the hotel staff are frantically trying to stop Vaggie from stealing their cleaning supplies.]

Broom Guy: Miss! You can't take those!

Vaggie: Watch me!

Tom: [He sighs and stands up. And walks away and catches Vaggie as she runs.] Not so fast tiny.

[Katie laughs at the sight of Tom catching Vaggie.]

Vaggie: Let me go! I want those cleaning supplies!

Tom: What're you gonna do with them? Mop some floors?

Vaggie: Yeah!

[Tom rolls his eyes and looks at Katie.]

Tom: Is she really that serious?

Katie: You know how extra she gets. She wants the floors and windows of any place we are at to be sparkling clean for some reason. I don't know why.

Angel Dust: Only Vox knows, probably.

[Tom looks at Vaggie like she's lost her mind.]

Tom: You realize we're only here for a week, right?

Vaggie: I don't care! Those floors need to be spotless before those three come back!

Tom: They don't have to be.

[Suddenly, there's a knock on the door. Angel groans and gets up to answer.]

Angel Dust: Who is it?

[Katie perks up from their movie.]

Tom: Who the hell could that be? Lute, Adam and Vox aren't back yet.

[Angel opens the door and sees the hotel manager.]

Hotel Manager: Hi, there's been complaints of a woman stealing from housekeeping. Did you people happen to see her come through here?

Tom: [He hides Vaggie behind his back.] No. Why do you ask?

Hotel Manager: [He notices Vaggie.) I knew it. Ma'am, I can see you behind his back. I'm gonna need you to step forward.

Tom: Oh Vox is not NOT be overjoyed when he hears this.

Katie: Angel, Mouthgag.

Hotel Manager: What?

[Back to Lute and the other two men that protect her.]

Lute: Pizza! [She excitedly rushes into the place as the patrons there look at her in shock, cus all they see is a 20 something year old woman just bursting into the place all happy.]

Lute: Hi! Hello! [She walks to the counter] Hi. I wanna order uh...[She starts counting on her fingers] 1...2...3...4...Uh...Katie...Me...Tom...Angel...Vaggie...Vox...

Adam: 6 pizzas. I want ribs. I don't want pizzas.

Lute: Okay. 6 pizzas then! [She smiles happily]

Worker: Uh...There's a line...

Lute: Oh shit! Im so sorry!

[A little while later after waiting]

Lute: Alright. So. 6 pizzas. One of each of these; Hawaii, Italian, Double Cheesed crusted pizzas. And 2 pepperoni pizzas. Vox, what do you want?

Vox: Breakfast pizza.

Worker: It's 1 in the afternoon. We don't serve breakfast foods after 9 o'clock. (Im so sorry, im basing time from MY timezone, i don't know alot of them.)

Vox: I said. I. Want. Breakfast. Pizza.

[The worker, scared, nods at Vox and rushes to the kitchen.]

Vox: Cool.

Adam: Im gonna get my ribs.

Lute: Take care sweetie!

[About an hour later, of boring waiting, they finally get their pizzas (I used the word pizza so many times. Im gonna find some other verbs for it.) And Adam waits for them outside with 2 small boxes of Ribs.]

Adam: Hi guys. [He eats a rib like buzzsaw, classic Adam) as he smiles at Lute.]

Lute: Heya. [She gives 3 boxes to Vox. As the they walk back to the hotel they are staying at.]

[Inside of their room, Tom breaks a few cameras and Katie deletes the videos.]

Katie: There. Done and done. Vaggie no! You don't kill anyone!

Vaggie: Aw maaannn...[She releases the knife she was holding at the manager.]

Tom: Now let the guy go. He'll just think he's dreaming. [Points at the manager, who Angel mouthgagged and accidentally hit him on the head.]

Angel Dust: Fine, i'll let him go.

[Just as Angel walks out with the body, the three appear holding the boxes]

Lute: We're baaaaaccckkk!..What's with the cameras?

Tom: They broke.

Adam: Uh-huh. Im not believing you.

Lute: Anywaysss. Let's eat! [She and Vox puts the boxes down to the table.]

Vaggie: Yayy! Lunch!

[Chapter ends here.]

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins up in Heaven! Things are going smoothly. Exceeepttt. At the beach.]

Cherri: Pentious is dead. Which means your deal is done, and I'm in charge now. Lilith's new dumb brat is threatening the very foundation of Heaven. And if you want to stay here, [She leans down and pointing at the sea.] you're going down there [She points at the woman], and stopping that bitch. You understand me...Charlotte?

Charlotte: [She stands up and doesn't say anything and take soff her glasses.] Do you even knwo who you're talking to? Bomb bitch? Im not going down there. [She takes her drink and takes a sip from it. (It has a straw with a duck on it.)] So don't try anything.

Cherri: Oh im sorry, but you have to listen! And you will!

Charlotte: And i will why?

Cherri: Because it's my end of the deal now! So you will listen! [She flies up to Charlie's face.] You brat!

Charlotte: Im still older than you. So the brat here. Is you. Brat. Also. [She grabs Cherri's arm and pulls her down, making Cherri fall, due to not having one of her legs to stand properly.] Hm.

Cherri: You don't have any right to do this!

Charlotte: But i do. Princess of Hell, remember?

Cherri: Your power and status up here is meaningless!

Charlotte: Much like your boyfriend.

[Charlie's words stung Cherri, and she clenched her fists in anger.]

Cherri: How dare you bring up Pentious! [Her single leg started to trembled slightly with frustration, and she tried to regain her composure.] You think you can talk about me and Pentious like that? Just because you're the princess of Hell?!

Charlotte: Exactly~ [She sits back down into her chair]

[Cherri's irritation continued to grow, she gritted her teeth angrily (Angry Cherry).]

Cherri: You think you're untouchable, don't you? You think that just because you're Lucifer and Lilith's brat you can get away with whatever you want?! Well, let me tell you something. You're not a princess up here!

Charlotte: You're right. [She smiles smugly] Im a Queen up here. And im not going back down there. Not now. Not ever.

Cherri: You don't get to decide-

Charlotte: Do you want me to tell the elders and Seraphims abouut our deal?

Cherri: What? No! You wouldn't dare!

Charlotte: I would. Defecto. I still don't know how the exorcists don't question how you only have one eye.

Cherri: Don't you tell anything to the seraphims!

Charlotte: I would~ I should do it. Right now. Make sure you get back down to where you belong!

[Flashback timeee...With a twist!]

[Cut down to Hell. During the 1980s. Where a certain snake sinner tries to shoot an exorcist, as he tries to protect a certain cyclops~.]

Sir Pentious: Are you okay missss? [He grabs her hand and the two run away and hide in an abandoned building.] Hi. You're new down here huh?

Cherri: Y-Yeah...Name's Cherri...

Sir Pentious: I am the great Sir Pentioussss, Inventor! And future overlord!

Cherri: Overlord?

Sir Pentious: Right. You're new. Overlords have a high statusss down here! One rank above everyone!

Cherri: Maybe we should team up to become overlords! You in?

Sir Pentious: Fucking weird ass bitch you are. Fuck it. Im in.

[The two shake hands.]

[Cut to the two trying to kill demons and trying to gain territory.]

Sir Pentious: You're a good misss fighter.

Cherri: You're not bad either. For a guy with two dicks.

Sir Pentious: Perks of being a snake.

[Cut to a news broadcast.]

Zestial: Breaking news in hell today! Ears and eyes in Hell caught two pathetic sinners trying to rise the ranks to become Overlords! Such pathetic attempts! Hah! Isn't it right Zilla?

Missi Zilla: It's all right! So pathetic! Everyone knows you cannot climb the ranks just by killing! Hah!

[Cut to later, Cherri came back to their hideout with angelic weapons she stole.]

Cherri: We could make some good weapons with these.

Sir Pentious: Nice idea. But we don't have any plan how.

[Cut to another news shot.]

Zestial: Those two pathetic excuses are at it again! Trying to be OVERLORDS! HAHA!

[Everyone in Hell are laughing as the two.]

Sir Pentious: [His eyes widen as they look at the tv screen] They can’t be talking about us…

Cherri: [She crosses her arms] Oh, they're definitely talking about us. Can you believe this? We're like the laughingstock of Hell!

Sir Pentious: Thissss isss humiliating!

Charlotte: (Narrating) You two were just some loathsome sinners. Always just sad. So pitiful you came to me of all demons!

[Cut to the Morningstar castle. Charlie is sitting in her office room.]

Charlotte: So. You two wanna be up there? In Heaven? [She smirks and laughs, then gets serious] Not a chance.

Cherri: We need this!

Charlotte: And what do i get out of it?

Cherri: You can...

Sir Pentious: If you erase everything, everyone's memories, every news broadcast! We can keep you up in Heaven!

Charlotte: Now we're talking. Alright. But on one condition. If either of you two die. Our deal is done.

[Charlie's horns pop out and her eyes light up, and she holds out both of her hands. Which Cherri and Pentious both shake]

Charlotte: Now then! [She claps her hands, and a huge bright light flashes all across Hell, every ring]

Cherri: So...It's done?...

[Both Cherri and Pentious start screaming in pain, and when they open their eyes. Both of them are in Heaven]

Sir Pentious: What the-?

[Pentious looks around and sees winners everywhere, and Cherri looks around everywhere and notices a window. And both of them look into it.]

Cherri: Holy shit!

[Everyone looks at both of them. And someone appears.]

Odette: Oh, New winners. What are your names?...

Cherri: It's uh...Cherri...And Sir Pentious...

Odette: Kind of sounds like Serpent. Buut whatever. I don't pick names to be called up here. Hmm... [She looks at the list] Ah, there you two are. Clara! Add these two to the tourists of new winners.

Clara: [She gasps excitedly] New winners?! Oh. Come along. The tour is just starting. We always gather up atleast 600 new winners and give them a tour of Heaven, we can do 2 more people. Come on! Come along you two! There are so many things to miss. And so many little things to see-[Her smile freezes as she corrects herself.] Scratch that. Reverse it.

Cherri: Uh-huh...

[Later. Clara shows every newcomer their houses, or hotel rooms. Depends on where the person wants to live at.]

Clara: This is where you newcomers will stay. The house can change depend on what you want it to look like.

[Cherri and Pentious are walking around. And they walk inside their house. And they see the neighbor.]

Molly: Hello! Good day newcomers! Hiii! [She waves at Cherri and Pentious. The two walk inside their house.]

Cherri: So what now? We're up here. What now?

Sir Pentious: Firssst, we lay low. And then. We can do everything we wanted. We jussst have to do enough NOT to get kicked down back to Hell!

[Flashback ends.]

Charlotte: I agreed to erase your sins from the list by sneaking up into Heaven, and destroying it... So you should be grateful for what i did. Your boy toy became head pf exprcists, thanks to my intervention to the lists. And you became liutenant. You ungrateful bitch. So im staying here unless i wanna go down there again!

[Charlie sits back down, and Cherri flies away, disgusted, and mad by Charlie's behaviour.]

Cherri: 🎵Always about what you want. Well im not letting you do that! I won't let you act like a snake! Even if you are one by means.🎵

[Cherri flies to her room, and picks up her sword and stabs a picture of the Hotel's residents and throws her sword at it and as the picture falls, she stabs it multiple times angrily.]

Cherri: 🎵I'll crush that place. I'll watch the sinners bleed! And watch as they fall from their grace! If i have to. I will kill all of them! [She picks up the picture and uses her sword to cut Lute's throat.] I will make them beg and cry! Noone left to be alive! All will tremble beneath me. [She cuts apart the picture.] I'll burn them to the ground. And that Hotel, will bow to me.🎵

[A shadow in the background listened to Cherri's whole song, and then dissapears.]

[Cut down to Hell, as the shadow appears again, and gives a woman a Red orb that shows the entire scene, all of it, from Cherri talking with Charlie, to Cherri's song.]

?: Everything is going perfectly smooth.

[The woman holding the orb laughs evily.]

[Chapter ends here. And who is the woman? It's a suprise~.]

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins in the Hotel. Everyone arguing.]

Adam: Katie! There you are! Did you seriously sneak out of the hotel again?! You said you wouldn't do it again!

Katie: Who? Me? I would never! But, yeah, I did.

Adam: You are so fucking grounded!

Katie: [She laughs] Oh, well, sorry...Im not your kid for you to boss around. And i don't know what you expected. I needed to go out too. You and Lute leave almost everyday.

Adam: That is different! So different in EVERY ways! We. Go. On. DATES! Not out clubbing with Tom or Angel! Speaking of Tom! [He turns to look at Tom] Need I remind you that YOU WERE MEANT TO FUCKING WATCH OVER HER, DUDE?! I'm not gonna let you sabotage this hotel's image, we just got it back to being somewhat normal to people! So you can shove your partying and clubbing, up your asses! I swear, if you make this place look like a fucking joke AGAIN! I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WILL DO TO YOU TWO! Because it seems like currently, the most NORMAL guest here, is Angel!

Angel Dust: Cus im in fuckin' love with that cat...[He cries into a pillow all of the sudden, and lays on the couch] I miss him!

[Vaggie rushes in and puts a blanket on top of Angel and pats his head]

Angel Dust: Thanks Vags...

Adam: SEE?! Even Vaggie is acting...somewhat normal. If she can be normal...Always wondered what got her down here.

Lute: Alright...guys, it's time we all just calm down. Okay? Taoe deep breaths? Yeah. Adam. You go and take a rest. Okay? Okay. [She leads Adam to their bedroom. And lays him on the couch and kisses his foregead before tucking him in, then walks out of the room and closes the door] As for you two. Try and not to cause that much mayhem and havoc. Just...don't go out to party that much. Things are stressful as they are right now. I don't want more on my, Adam's, or Anyone's mind for the matter. Can you just promise it?

Katie: Fine. But you owe me one for this.

Tom: Ugh...fine. But you clean up the bar.

Lute: Thanks you guys. [She goes into the kitchen to eat.] Uugh...

Vaggie: You look stressed. What happened?

Lute: Everything. Stress, paperwork, those two back at it again. I don't know what to do.

Vaggie: I know what would cheer you up! [She takes out a plate of Waffles] Here! They always calm me down.

Lute: Thanks Vaggie...[She takes a waffle and eats it, then sits down on a nearby chair] I don't know anymore...I don't even know if this hotel idea was a good idea at all...What do you think? If you weren't working for Vox and he didn't bring you here. Would you have come here on your own?

Vaggie: I don't know. Probably yes.

Lute: Really?

Vaggie: Yeah. I always wanted more friends. [She thinks of an idea and gasps] We could go out. Girls day out. And you can get stress out of your system!

Lute: I don't...you know what? Alright! Im sure Adam and Vox can handle everything on their own!

[Later]

Adam: WHAT?!

Lute: Yup. Im going to take a girls day out with Vaggie. Excluding Katie. She's grounded.

Katie: Im still pissed!

Adam: Sweetie. You know i can hardly control them. Without you here, i'd-

Lute: Baby. You're my boyfriend. I believe in you. You can take care of them.

Adam: Alright....Take care you two!

[Lute and Vaggie walk out of the Hotel.]

[The two walk out into the city.]

[Scene cut to an arcade, Lute and Vaggie are seen playing a game inside. They both laugh while exiting, abd running out with their gifts they got. As they giggle and laugh.]

[Another scene cut to them at a bar, dancing. Vaggie tries to run off and get cleaning supplies to start cleaning everything up. But before she could, Lute grabs her.]

Lute: Not today, tiny.

Vaggie: Ah fuc-

Lute: No curse words.

[Later that night, they both go into a movie theatre, eating popcorn, but Vaggie keeps trying to clean everything up, which starts to annoy Lute, as her eye twitches. The people near them either drop their foods and drinks on accident, or on purpose just to make Vaggie clean up everything. Lute gets even more annoyed.]

Lute: [She sighs and looks at Vaggie] Vaggie, sit. Down.

Vaggie: Okay...

[They both walk out into the streets, and they look up into the sky, but Lute looks away for a moment before looking back at her, but she is collecting every dirty thing like crazy.]

Vaggie: Best day ever, right? I told you you'd enjoy yourself out here!

Lute: [Her eye twitches angrily as she looks at Vaggie cleaning the streets up] Yeah, yeah, i guess.

Vaggie: It's awesome!

Lute: Uh-huh...

Vaggie: There are so many things we could do again next time! [She happily gasps] or maybe right now! And then we can-

Lute: Enough! Vaggie. I love having fun with you! But your clean freakyness is driving me. CRAZY. AND. NUTS!...[She realizes what she just said] Shit...That slipped out.

Vaggie: What?..

Lute: You know...I mean, sure, inside the hotel, being a clean freak isn't that bad, it's your job to clean up! But out here?! It's not.

Vaggie: I'm sorry...But i have my own reason to do these things...

Lute: [She gets angrier] And then what is it?! Hm?! TELL ME! WHAT IS YOUR FUCKING REASON TO BEING A CLEAN FREAK?!

[Vaggie looks hurt at Lute, but she begins to explain her reasons, by a song. The song is inspired by "Drift away" from Steven Universe. I just thought it would fit into this.]

Vaggie: 🎵Back down on Earth...Having fun with a sister. Swore that i'd protect her...Show her how to fight for herself. Only to fail...Lose the one i cared for...🎵

[Vaggie walks and spins around sadly as Lute watches and listens to her sing.]

Vaggie: 🎵She always smiled. A smile so bright. She was so happy. Happy to live. Then it came all down...He had to come back...Now all on my own...Had to find a way...To make her not starve...To make her happy again...🎵

[Vaggie stares into a puddle, as her human face appears, alongside her sister.]

Vaggie: 🎵Counting the seconds, always alone. As he started to beat us more...But wondering...Night after night. Will this be good for her?..Will i not dissapoint?..Am i in the right here? Always helped her...Protected her...But watching as he killed her...It keeps on going on for long.. With people who don't care...People who don't care...about you...🎵

[Vaggie crosses her arms, and hugs herself, and she looks back at Lute with a sad face.]

Vaggie: 🎵And still it takes you some time. To see that no one's there...See that no one's there...See that no one's there anymore...The one person you cared for is gone...And then our story ended...She doesn't exist now. Killed by our father...Alongside our mother...Isn't that cruel?..Isn't that great? No more pressure for me...But im just a fool because...I let it all happen...Not able to save them...🎵

[Vaggie ends her song by crying, and Lute rushes to hug her, and Vaggie cries into Lute's shoulder]

Lute: There, there...It's okay. Im here.

Vaggie: Im a clean freak because cleaning like crazy makes my mind drift away from the thought that i let my sister and mom get killed by our dad...The only happy thing i know about them now is that mom and my sister are up in Heaven.

Lute: Im so sorry...I shouldn't have lashed out on you...

Vaggie: It's fine...Let's go back to the Hotel...

Lute: Yeah. Let's.

[Lute takes Vaggie's hand and they walk back home. Later, Lute is carrying a sleeping Vaggie in her arms.]

Adam: Sooo. How'd it go?

Lute: It was fine. We had fun. She fell asleep on the way back. Im gonna put her to bed...Seems like everything was fine here as well.

Adam: Yep. No problems.

[Tom and Katie come into the hotel lobby, panting as they have ropes on their wrists.]

Katie: I'll kill you Adam, I swear we will-

[Lute glares at Katie for being so loud, signaling her that if she wakes Vaggie up, she'll be double dead.]

Tom: [In a whisper] We'll fucking kill you, first man...But only next time.

[Chapter ends here.]

Chapter Text

Sooo. Been meaning to make this chapter for a bit. So since i started season 2 of this fanfic, without the official one veing out yet. It gonna make some plotholes. Hahaaa. But,gonna do 🎵whatever it takeeeeessss🎵 to make the plotlines maje sense.

Also. Quick thing. Im not gonna upload for a short while, working on the Christmas chapter, and i want it to be one of the longer chapters. And i want to upload it on December 25th. Which is only a few weeks away. So i'll most likely only be fixing spelling errors of previpus chapters. Or if you conment under this, or any chapter, asking questions, or just wanna have a chat, i'll be free to talk. Trust me. Thoo. My replies may take a but longer to arrive, cus i started working on 2 other stories, a Helluva Boss AU, AND an original story i've been wanting to release somewhere for a while, and this place is perfect for it.

But i'll be uploading the Helluva Boss au first, and not my own story, cus it takes longer to write scripts, episode 1 isn't even completed yet, and storyplots for ALOT lf the episodes is hard to think about, write, or just make it come alive. Also, that story's name will be called; "LEGENDS", it's a fantasy, magical adventure story. I've been working on it since i was 12. Im not revealing anything about the story, or

So either see you later on the HB AU book, or my own original story.

Until then. See ya' later.

Chapter Text

[Chapter opens inside of the Hotel. It is cureently December 24th. Everyone is finishing decorating. Lute is in the kitchen making food for everyone. Lilith and Vox are arguing as always, but this time, they're arguing over the decoration. Vaggie, as usual, is cleaning up the hotel, even tho it's spotless. Angel and Katie are both setting up the table. Meanwhile, Tom is making the drinks for everyone. And what is Adam doing? Looking for a mistletoe for a special someone.]

Lute: Where's the sugar? Vaggie? Where'd you put it?

Vaggie: Left corner cupboard! Inside in the right corner!

Lute: Oh. Thanks. Found it.

Vox: Fuck you Lilith! Im putting up the lights!

Lilith: As the queen. I AM putting it up!

Katie: [Fixing the table.] 🎵Deck the halls with boughs of holly. Fa la la la la, la la la la.🎵

Angel Dust: 🎵fa la la la la, la la la la🎵

Tom: Were you two just singing?

Katie: Yes. And?

Tom: [He shrugs his shoulders.] Hm.

[A little while later. Everyone was gathered in the living room having a fun time excited for tomorrow. The big Christmas tree with endless decoration on them, lit up the whole room. Lute put the star on top of the christmas tree. And put on her santa hat. Everyone was enjoying a cup of hot chocolate.]

Katie: And i told him. "Fuck off spiderman wannabe"

Tom: Haha! Saying that to Zestial is just funny. Hilarious!

[There was Christmas music playing in the background.]

Angel Dust: How long until we can open the presents? I wanna open them now.

Lute: Not now Angel, you need to wait for tomorrow.

[Angel starts painting his bombs with christmas colors.]

Adam: Be careful with those. If they explode. Im slapping you multiple times!

Lute: Tho Angel is kinda right...I can't wait to see what I got!!!

Adam: Me neither babe. But you have to wait for tomorrow.

Angel dust: I especially like this day and my Christmas dress, don't you think so Tom?

Tom: if you don't shut up, I'll stuff this bottle down your throat!

Katie: What? Last minute we were having a friendly conversation.

Lute: I wonder how Husk is doing...

[While up in Heaveeeeennnn!!!]

Clara: Eeeek! Your first Christmas here! I cannot wait for you to enjoy everything!

Husk: Well...Thank you uhm...Clara...

Clara: Let's get the tree decorated!

Odette: Clara...Calm down...We talked about this...You need to be calmer.

Clara: But i don't wanna! Im excited for Christmas!!! [She jumps and flies around happily. And she starts singing (Yes. I wrote this song.) 🎵It's finally Christmas! Have a look all around! Everyone happy! Enjoying afterlife! [She flies around and high fives the winners.] Everyone happy! Because it's Christmas day! Oooohhoo!🎵

[Back down in Hell.]

Lute: 🎵Finally Christmas! Sooner or later! We'll enjoy all of this! Lookie-look all around! Sinners happy! Cus it is Christmas day!🎵

Sinner: Shut the fuck up bitch!

Lute: [Her shrugs drop but she continues singing] 🎵More than happy to enjoy this da-a-a-a-ay!🎵

[Cut to an inbetween with Clara and Lute]

Clara & Lute: 🎵More than happy to enjoy this day! With winners/sinners all around us! We'll make the best of it all! We'll make all the people happy, and have them enjoy. this. Day!🎵

[Again in Heaven.]

Odette: Gotta admit, your voice is so beautiful sis.

Clara: Aww. Thank you.

[Husk smiles at the two, but his smile drops as he remembers that he can't be with the people he loves.]

[Cut back down to Hell.]

[As they happily celebrated in the hotel, they all prepared for their own ideas for Christmas day. The warmth of the crackling fire and the soft hum of the Christmas lights bathed the room in a cozy glow. Lute had went back to the kitchen to make sure the cookies weren’t burning.]

Lute: Mom, I swear, if you two keep arguing over the lights, I'm putting you two in a timeout corner.

Vox: Like you could, dear.

Adam: I beg to differ. She put me in a timeout corner last year during one summer.

[Meanwhile, Angel went to his room, and then a dew mimutes latet, came out dramatically in his Christmas dress.]

Angel Dust: Alright, folks, I’ve got a surprise. Im the christmas gift.

[Everyone looks a bit...disguted.]

Vaggie: Good thing im lesbian!

[Angel walked across the living room like it was his personal catwalk.]

Angel Dust: Thank you, thank you! No autographs unless you’re giving me a gift, though. No need to applaude.

Vaggie: We weren't.

Katie: [She leans towards Lute] What did you two do on your "girls day out" that made her more...freemouthed or something?

Lute: She opened up to me. She was adorable.

Tom: Honestly, Angel, you're impossible.

[Meanwhile, Adam continued to rummage through the decorations box, pretending he wasn’t looking for the mistletoe.]

Lilith: What'cha looking for Adam?

Adam: Just something for Lute.

Lilith: Let me guess. Mistlet-

Adam: [He runs up to her and covers her mouth] Shh. If she finds out, it'll ruin the suprise. I wanna suprise her. [He goes back to looking for a mitletoe]

[After a few moments, he pulled it out and nonchalantly walked over to Lute, holding it above their heads with a mischievous grin.]

Adam: Looks like we’re under some mistletoe, babe.

[Lute turned around, and looked up, her cheeks turned red.]

Lute: Oh, so that's why you were digging through all the boxes? Subtle, Adam. Real subtle.

[Adam leaned in and tried to kiss her, but Lute grabbed him by the waist and kissed him.]

Angel Dust: Ugh, save it for Valentine's Day, lovebirds!

Katie: Says the one inlove with a cat!

Angel Dust: Touché.

[Suddenly, there was a loud BOOM as one of Angel’s freshly painted Christmas bombs accidentally rolled too close to the fire and exploded.]

Adam: ANGEL! What the hell?!

Angel Dust: Hey, hey, it’s Christmas fireworks! You’re welcome!

Tom: More like a disaster waiting to happen.

Lute: Someone grab the fire extinguisher before anything bad happens. We need to do somethi- [She hears crying from her room] Oh great...THANKS ALOT! You woke our baby up! [She rushes to her room to calm her baby daughter down]

Adam: I'll kill you for this. Aurora wa snapping so peacefully.

Lilith: Calm down. It’s Christmas. Not murder day.

[As the chaos settled. Lute walked out with Aurora in her hands.]

Lute: Well. She'll be spending today with us, and tomorrow. She can't sleep. And if she can't, she won't.

Angel Dust: Sorry about waking her up.

Lute: [She sighs] It's okay...

Lilith: Gimmie my grandbaby! [She snatches Aurora from Lute] Hiya baby. [She sits on a couch and she starts playing with her grandbaby who she loves so much] Who's adorable? You. You're adorable!

[As Lilith is playing with Aurora, she begins giggling happily and clapping]

Tom: [He's speaking VERY quietly] That baby's the only sweet thing in Hell.

Vaggie: Did you say something?

Tom: Huh? No. No i did not.

Vaggie: Oookay.

[They couldn’t deny that this goofball baby, was adorable, even Vox loved the little baby, tho, Lilith doesn't let him near Aurora, so he only gets "babysitting time" when Lilith isn't around, or when Lute or Adam ask him.]

[The group truly felt like family- a sort of dysfunctional, dramatic, and utterly ridiculous, but a family nonetheless, and Lute loves this, she poves this extremely.]

Lute: I love this all. Adam, look at us. Everyone happy, and spending time!

Adam: Yeah, Lute. Except the fact that Lilith is hogging our daughter.

Lute: Every grandma does that.

[Back In Heaven, cus everyone loves Husk.]

[Husk helped Clara set up the tree, while Odette hummed a song in the background. Clara couldn’t stop smiling as she placed ornaments shaped like halos and stars.]

Clara: Husker, are you having fun? I know... It’s not Hell, but it’s still Christmas eve here too!

[Husk shrugged, his tail wrapped around his legs slightly as he placed a silver ornament on the tree.]

Husk: It’s...nice. I just...Just miss my friends, y’know?

[Clara tilted her head curiously, then her face lit up with an idea.]

Clara: Oh! I know what’s missing! Your friends! [She flew off and returned moments later with a photo frame.]

[Inside was a picture of the whole crew from the hotel. Husk stared at it, his usually gruff expression softening.]

Clara: You can keep this. Even if you're here, and they are donw there, they’re still your family, Husk.

Husk: Where'd you get this?

Clara: It's Heaven! You can get what your heart wants most here.

[Husk looked at the picture, then he nodded silently, clutching the photo tightly. And he felt his heart soften.]

Husk: Thank you...

Clara: I will help with anything and everything.

[Back down in Hell.]

[Lute and the others raised their mugs of hot chocolate.]

Lute: I cannot believe christmas is tomorrow. I hope you guys got gifts for everyone.

[Everyone cheered, and they drank their hot chocolates.]

[As the night carried on, the chaotic crew at the hotel settled into a quieter rhythm. The Christmas tree sparkled brilliantly, casting a soft glow on everyone gathered. Aurora had finally fallen asleep in Lilith’s arms, her tiny breaths are audible in the otherwise hushed room.]

Adam: [Looking at Aurora with a soft smile.] She really is the most peaceful part of this madness.

Lilith: [Whispering.] Shhh, don’t jinx it. She’s an angel when she’s asleep, but we all know who her parents are.

Vaggie: Literally. She IS an angel technically. Right?

Lute: On a technical level...Yeah. She is an angel.

[Everyone chuckled quietly, careful not to disturb Aurora.]

Katie: [As she is sipping her hot chocolate.] You know, for all this yelling, explosions, and general nonsense, this isn’t a bad Christmas Eve.

Angel Dust: Speak for yourself. I almost blew up the tree! Artistic genius is never appreciated.

Katie: [Rolling her eyes.] Oh yes, because “artistic genius” is what we call poorly painted bombs thaz explode at the fire place.

Vox: [Smirking.] She’s got a point, Angel. Maybe next time, try finger painting instead.

Vaggie: Oooohhh~.

Angel Dust: Don’t encourage them, Vaggie.

[Meanwhile, Adam was sneaking a glance at the gifts under the tree, attempting to figure out which one was from Lute.]

Lute: [Catching him.] Adam, stop snooping! You’ll ruin the surprise.

Adam: [Grinning sheepishly.] You can’t blame a guy for being curious..

Lute: [Crossing her arms.] Oh, it’s on now. Just wait until tomorrow. Also...There is a gift from a few special someone's.

Adam: Really?

[Lute nods and gives a happy "mhmhm" sound]

[Angel, ever the dramatically plopped onto the couch and draped himself across it like a diva.]

Angel Dust: Well, if everyone’s done bickering, can we talk about the real star of the evening? Me. I think I deserve a round of applause for my outfit.

Tom: [Deadpan.] Clap. Clap.

Katie: [Smirking.] That’s more than you deserve bestie.

[Angel rolled his eyes at the two's comment.]

Vaggie: [She looks around the room and sees something] Hey Angie. Look. [She points at the mistletoe Adam left at the table]

Angel Dust: You thinkin' what im thinkin'?

Vaggie: Yup.

[Angel takes the mistletoe from the table, and the two begin plotting something.]

[In Heaven, Husk sat near the glowing Christmas tree, still clutching the photo, and the kitten he got from Clara. Clara and Odette were quietly singing a carol together with some other angels, their voices harmonizing.]

Odette: [She notices Husk’s sad face.] You okay, Husker?

Husk: Yes...I just... didn’t think I’d feel this much like I belonged up here.

Clara: [Smiling warmly.] That’s what Christmas is all about! Belonging, love, and joy. Even if it takes time, you’ll see.

Husk: [Chuckling softly.] You’re too damn cheerful, you know that?

Clara: Guilty as charged!

[Husk allowed himself with a rare smile, his tail swishing lazily as he looked back at the photo of his friends. For the first time in a while, both in his life, and his afterlife, he felt at peace again.]

[Back down in Hell again, in the shadowy, and festive tower of The Old Entertainers, the trio of Alastor, Mimzy, and Rosie were having their own version of Christmas. Unlike the chaotic warmth of the hotel or the ethereal joy of Heaven, their celebration was more calmer.]

Alastor: [Adjusting his reindeer antlers, grinning ear to ear.] Ah, Christmas! Isn't it such a great time? Isn't this delightful Rosie?

Rosie: [She twirls in her dress, holding a martini glass.] Oh, it's simply divine!

Mimzy: [She places the last ornament on a black-and-gold Christmas tree.] Perfect. Now, what’s next? A toast? A song? Or we could open those presents?

Alastor: [His eyes gleaming mischievously.] Presents? Why, Mimzy, I didn’t think you were the sentimental type! But no. You wait until tomorrow.

[He snapped his fingers, and two elegantly wrapped boxes appeared out of thin air. Mimzy clapped her hands excitedly, while Rosie raised a curious eyebrow.]

Mimzy: Oh! Al, you shouldn’t have!

Rosie: I hope you knew what i wanted~.

Alastor: Why, of course i do! Nothing but the best for my dearest companions!

[Rosie poured more drinks into their glasses, and they raised their glasses in a toast, the sound of a jazz record playing in the background. They clinked their glasses and sipped their drinks.]

[Back at the hotel, the night grew quieter. Lute and Adam were still awake, sitting near the fire with Aurora nestled between them.]

Lute: [Whispering.] This is perfect, isn’t it?

Adam: [Smiling, his arm around her.] Yeah. Chaos and all, this is home.

[Lute leaned her head on his shoulder, the crackling of the fire the only sound as the clock ticked closer to midnight. Tomorrow was Christmas, and no matter what insanity awaited, they'd face it together as a family.]

[The next day, is ✨️Christmas Day at the Hotel✨️]

[The morning sun, if you could call it that in Hell, barely peeked through the windows of the hotel. The smell of freshly baked cookies and the distant hum of a christmas carol filled the air as everyone began to stir awake. Lute was already in the kitchen, flipping pancakes shaped like reindeer, snowflakes, and stars.]

Lute: Breakfast is ready! And if you’re not here in five minutes, Angel’s eating everything!

Angel Dust: Don’t tempt me with a good time sweetcheeks.

[One by one, the group shuffled into the dining room. Adam carried a still-sleepy Aurora, her tiny hands clutching a stuffed reindeer toy. Lilith followed closely, rubbing her eyes, and let me tell ya'll, her hair looks like an absolute mess, perks of having long hair that lands to your feet i guess.]

Adam: Morning, everyone.

Katie: [Sniffing the air.] Is that... cinnamon? Oh, Lute, you’re spoiling us.

Lute: It’s Christmas! If we’re not stuffing ourselves with food, are we even celebrating? Vaggie helped with the cookies. She was a huge help.

Vaggie: Your welcome.

[The table was piled high with a ridiculous feast, pancakes, waffles, scrambled eggs, bacon, stuffed cabbage and a mountain of syrup.]

Vaggie: Think we went a bit overboard?

Lute: Oooh, yes. We did.

[As everyone sat down, Tom poured orange juice for himself.]

Tom: No alcohol?

Adam: No. You won't be drinking during christmas, maybe at new years, but not. now. Got it?

Tom: Fine. Fine.

Katie: If anyone spills anything, I’m taking your presents back.

Vaggie: [Smirking.] Good luck with that. Angel’s already got to the syrup.

Angel Dust: [Feigning innocence.] Who, me? Never!

[After breakfast, they all gathered around the massive Christmas tree in the living room.]

Vox: I think something's wrong with your kid.

Adam: The fuck did you say about my daughter?!

[Vox holds up Aurora and she looks all red in the face as she's trying so hard to do something. Adam takes her from Vox.]

Adam: What's wrong sweetie?

Vox: She's been doing that since she woke up.

Adam: We'll call doctors from sloth. Okay? Lilith. Call someone from Sloth. Aurora seems sick.

Lilith: Okay! On it.

[A little later, cus the sloth demons are slow af. A baphomet checks on Aurora.]

Doctor: She seems fine. She is just going through something. You know. Angel babies and their systems don't take in Hell so greatly.

Lute: That makes sense. I had gone through that. But i was 5.

Doctor: She'll be alright. It's nothing severe. In a few moments, it'll go away. But it won't come back later. But if it does, then go to a hospital right away.

Lute: Thank you. [She picks up Aurora, and pays the doctor, who walks out the hotel.]

[A little while later, Aurora finally calmed down, and Lilith, Adam and Lute went back to the lobby, which was sparkling with the glow of lights and ornaments, and the piles of gifts beneath the tree was comically large.]

Angel Dust: [Excitedly bouncing.] Alright, who’s first? Let’s get this show on the road!

Lute: [She holds her baby close to herself] You’re going to have to wait. Let’s let the baby open hers first.

[Adam grabbed a tiny present wrapped in paper and handed it to Aurora, who cooed and clapped her hands as Lilith helped her open it. Inside was a plush angel doll.]

Lilith: [Beaming.] Isn’t it adorable? A perfect little guardian for my grandbaby.

[Aurora giggled and hugged the doll tightly, causing the whole room to melt into smiles.]

Tom: [Quietly.] That’s too sweet for this place.

Vox: Be a bit chiller Thomas.

Tom: First off. Thomas isn't even my real name. So don't call me that!

Vox: Whatever, Gas mask.

Tom: I'll kill you.

Vox: Uh-huh. But it's christmas. You know you can't.

[The rest of the crew began unwrapping gifts. Lute opened a hand-carved music box from Adam.]

Lute: Honey. You shouldn't have.

[Katie opened her gift and squealed over a new makeup kit.]

Katie: Alright. Who got me this?!

Vaggie: I did!

Katie: You know. You're my best friend now.

Angel Dust: [Slightly offended] Aren't I your bestie?

[Lilith got a stunning necklace from Vox, even though she refused to admit she liked it.]

Lilith: Aww. This is beautiful-I mean. I hate it. And it sucks.

Vox: I know you like it. Your majesty.

Lilith: No i don't.

Vox: Yes you do.

[Vaggie unwrapped her present, which was from Tom]

Vaggie: [She gasps when she sees the gift] I love it! Thanks Tom! [What's the gift you may ask? Vaggie's been asking for a sword she saw once in a game Angel was playing, and Tom got it for her]

Tom: Glad you like it.

Katie: Speaking of Tom. I got you this. [She hands Tom a new camera] I know how much you like these.

[Tom takes the box from Katie]

Tom: It's great. Thank you. So much.

Katie: Didn't think you'd like it this much.

Lute: Wait. Adam...Did you get Aurora her special present?

Adam: I couldn't. The krampus we went to wouldn't tell me what she wanted.

Lute: Then what are we gonna do?!

Lilith: So where's my grandbaby's special present?

Vox: I think it's the pink and red wrapped box. The boxes have names on it tho.

[Lilith puts Aurora down, and she helps her open the box, and it is a dollhouse.]

Lilith: Just what she wanted! Yayy.

Lute: But who got it? [She and Adam look at the fireplace. When-]

Katie: Oh come on, it was me. That baby's been babbling about things, and drawing dollhouses all year, i knew she wanted one of these all this time.

Adam: Have i told you you're my favorite guest here?

Angel Dust: [Looking around.] And where’s MY big gift? I know someone went all out for me~

Lute: Check the back of the tree.

[Angel dove under the tree and pulled out a massive box wrapped in pink paper. He tore it open to reveal a brand-new, custom-made sewing machine.]

Angel Dust: [Gasping.] Are you serious?! Oh my Lucifer, I love it! Who’s responsible for this masterpiece?

Lute: [Winking.] Merry Christmas, Angel. Now you can make all the outfits you’ve been dreaming about.

Angel Dust: [Running up to hug her.] You’re the best! I gotta make fat nuggets a new outfit! Speaking of fat nuggets, and gifts. Ooooh Voooox.

Vox: Yes?

Angel Dust: Here. [He hands Vox a small box.]

Vox: Wow. A small box. Cool. [He takes the box and opens it.] A new phone?! Wooow. Angel. Thank you so much.

[Meanwhile in another place:]

Emily: Seraaaa! I got you something!

Sera: You did? What?

Emily: [She pulls out a box] I thought it would be good to give you something.

Sera: Thank you little sis. [She takes the box and reads what is written on the box "To the best big sis", she opens the box and sees a little crown in it.]

Emily: To make it official.

Sera: But. All I got you was a picture of you when you were a baby...

Emily: And i put it in a frame! I love it. Pictures how much you love me.

[Sera smiles as Emily begins to ramble about how much she loves the gift Sera got for her.]

[Back at the hotel, again, the lobby was filled with laughter, chatter, and the occasional sound of wrapping paper being ripped apart. Aurora played with her new toys while Lilith and Vox argued over who had the best gift.]

Lute: What's wrong Adam?

Adam: Wish i could celebrate christmas with atleast one of my sons...I know Cain is down here...

Lute: Here...He couldn't give it to you, so he asked me to give it. [She takes out a box]

Adam: What? [He takes the box and opens it. He sees a sweater and a paper. He takes the paper out and reads it.] "Im sorry i couldn't be there to give you this, alot of things came up, and i couldn't show there. I hope the sweater is good, i made it myself. Merry Christmas. Ps. Don't tell Abel." [He takes out the sweater and he hugs it, then he cries into the sweater.]

Lute: Hey...it's okay...

Adam: You don't understand! I love this! So much...Im putting this on...

[Later that evening, the group gathered around the fireplace, the remnants of Christmas dinner scattered across the table. The fire crackled warmly, and the lights on the tree blinked softly.]

Lute: [Sitting beside Adam, Aurora on her lap.] This has been the best Christmas ever.

Adam: [He smiles brightly.] Even with Angel’s... “firework show” last night?

Lute: [She laughs.] Especially with that.

Vox: Love your sweater Adam. Who got it?

Adam: A special somebody...That i still hold close to my heart...

Lute: [She gives Adam Aurora, and she raises her glass.] To chaos! And not dying at the extermination this year either!

Katie: [Dryly.] And to not blowing up the hotel next year.

Vox: And didn't you hear? Cus we killed so many exorcists. Extermination day this year isn't happening. We killed 80% of the exorcists.

Vaggie: Whaaaa-?

Vox: Yup. We got it from Heaven themselves.

Lute: Speaking of Heaven...[She looks up] Merry Christmas Clara, Odette and Husk.

[Quick jump up to Heaven]

Clara: Merry Christmas to you guys in Hell.

Husk: Have a happy christmas.

Odette: Yeah. Merry Christmas.

[Clara, just for fun, puts a reindeer hat onto Odette's head, Clara flies away, laughing, while Odette chases her around]

Odette: GET BACK HERE!

Carmilla: What happened here?

Husk: I dunno...Sibling stuff.

Carmilla: Clara always does that every year...How ár eyou enjoying Heaven?

Husk: It's...good. Fun too...

Carmilla: Well good. Now let's eat. Come.

[Carmilla leads Husk away to a dinner table in her home, I guess...Seraphim house.]

[Back down in Hell, Everyone in the hotel laughed and raised their glasses. For a moment, with all the madness, the hotel felt like the coziest place in Hell. Christmas had come and gone in their own ridiculous way, and no one would have it any other way.]

Aurora: Mapa!

Lute: WHAT?!

Aurora: Mapa!

Vaggie: Aww. She said her first words.

Katie: The hell is a "Mapa"?

Vaggie: I think it's a more hungarian way of saying "File"

[Aurora shakes her head as a way of sayin "no" and she points at Lute and Adam with her hands. And then she giggles happily.]

Lute: Aww. I think she said Mama and Papa at the same time. Guess she doesn't have a favorite parent.

Adam: This is the best christmas present ever. [He picks up Aurora and hugs her, but just then, Aurora's wings pop out. Leaving everyone suprised.] What else do you have in suprise for us?!

[Vaggie and Angel giggle as they put the Mistletoe they found earlier above Katie and Tom's heads.]

Tom: What the fuck?!

Vaggie: You gotta kiss now.

Angel Dust: No cheating~

Tom: No way.

Katie: There is no way im kissing him-

Angel Dust: You have to. Rules.

Katie: Fine.

Tom: Yeah.

[Tom grabs Katie by the collar of her shirt and kisses her, and that kiss goes on for too long.]

Vox: They're enjoying this too much...

Lilith: Cover the baby's eyes. NOW!

Lute: I guess there is one thing left to do! A song!

Lilith: Yeah! Song!

Vaggie: Yes! Cantalo baby! (Helluva boss reference)

[Tom and Katie stop kissing. And look at Lute.]

Lute: [She takes out a microphone] 🎵Gonna have a mistletoe. Mixed with a little jingle bells. Even tho we don't have snow. Hang a star upon a Christmas tree.🎵

[Adam helps Aurora put on the star on top of the tree, yes, they left it for the baby, and for Christmas day.]

Lute: 🎵Tie it all up with a little bow. Sit by the fireplace. Can't wait 'cause it's my. Favorite time of year.🎵

Lilith: 🎵Yeah, it's now here. Out favorite time of year. Feel it in the air. We'll be singin' everywhere we go. We'll be busy makin' memories. All the way up up to New Year's Eve.🎵

Lute: 🎵The city's up in red and gold. We'll be dreaming tonight. Sitting by the fireplace.🎵

Lilith: 🎵It is our. Favorite time of year. And now that it is here. Make a wish, and it will come true.🎵

Lute: 🎵Cus it's gonna be true.🎵

Vox: That was great.

Adam: I loved every part of it.

[Up in Heaven, AGAIN!]

Charlotte: Happy Christmas, dad. [She takes a photo of Lucifer] Wish you could come up here, but you can't...But i can go down again...I'll be seeing you soon, dad.

[Back down in Hell, AGAIN AGAIN!]

Vox: I do gotta go somewhere, i'll be right back.

[With that, Vox walks out, and later, he goes Downtown.]

Vox: Hello, Valentino.

Valentino: Voxxy-Poxxy? What are you doing here? Merry christmas.

Vox: I had to visit my love. And give you this. [He hands Val a box]

Valentino: Aww. Thanks honey. But i got you something too.

[They hand each other their boxes. Vox opens his first and it is a keychain, it has a figure of Val, with the words "Baby" next to it. Val then opens his and it is a phone case. It has a moth on the back]

Valentino: Aww. I love it.

Vox: Me too.

[The two look at their gifts and then hug and kiss each other.]

Valentino: You know what? I'll go with you to that Hotel. Visit the good ol' Luella. Such a sweetie.

Vox: Come along then.

[Chapter ends here. Thank you for reading. Have a Merry Christmas, and a happy new year.]

Chapter Text

1. New years.

Lute: Alright gang. It's new years time!

Tom: Which means?~

Adam: [He sighs] Alright fineee. You can drink anything you want. But-

Tom: Got it.

Katie:Yeah. We won't drink...too much. We can only promise one thing.

[Later]

Vox: Vaggie. What are you doing? And where are you going?

Vaggie: Tom and Katie drank too much.

Vox: Oooh.

2. The box.

[Aurora is playing with a box.]

Adam: Aww. What is my baby playing with?

Aurora: Box!

Adam: Aww. That's so sweet.

[Lute walks by.]

Lute: Isn't that the box Katie always hides her drug stashes in?

Adam: [Stares at the box and then at his baby.] You sneaky son of a bi- [He notices Lute holding up her slipper, with a look of "Finish that sentence and you're dead"] I mean. Beautiful daughter of a gorgeous woman.

3. Breaking the fourth wall.

Vaggie: Do you ever feel lime we're being watched?

Vox: Vaggie, darling, that is the fourth wall. We just pretend it's not there.

4. What flags do they hold at a pride parade?

(Some of these are headcanon's.)

Lute: Im a Bi.

Adam: Not gonna lie. Im an ally. Sorry men, tho yoou guys are handsome.

Vaggie: Im a lesbean. And Angel is gay.

Vox: Obvious. Bisexual. What? Do you think i am "besties" with Val?

Katie: im straight. DUH. What did you think?

Tom: You talk to women like you are inlove with them.

Katie: As if you're straight.

Tom: Fuck you!

(Both are straight. Headcanon.)

5. Gayness everywhere. (This is before Husk went to Heaveennn.)

Angel Dust: Lute. Im gay.

Lute: Whaaa?

Husk: I date men too.

Lute: Okay. Cool. Cool.

Adam: is there ANYONE who dates women? Besdies me?

[Vaggie appears.]
(Not my own joke. I know. But i thought it'd be fun to icnlude it.)

6. Babysitter.

Katie: Okay tiny, I'm watching over you today.

[Katie looks down and sees Aurora chewing on her own leg.]

Katie: No! Bad baby. No. You don't do that.

[Katie picks her up and puts her infront of herself. But a few minutes later. She falls asleep. About an hour later. She jolts awake and sees the baby is drawing.]

Katie: Aw. What'cha drawing you baby?

[Aurora shows her a drawing of hereelf and Katie holding hands.]

Katie: It's beautiful...You're officially my favorite baby.

7. What does it mean?

Tom: Ah fuck. Fml. Fml. Fml. Fml.

Vaggie: What does that mean?

Tom: Uhm...Flora Melody Land!

Katie: That's not what it means.

Tom: Shut up.

8. Grandmommy's storytime.

Lilith: [She has Aurora on her lap.] And then. I told him "No. Im not about to do that." He was all sad and shocked. And then i asled him: "Are you REALLY sure you want to do that?" And once i finished what I was saying, everything exploded.

[Aurora, not knowing what all this means, cus she's a small baby, just clapped happily.]

Lilith: Aww. I could never resist such a cutie pie. My grandbaby.

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins in Lute and Adam's room. Lute opens her eyes and sees Vaggie standing on her chest, staring into her eyes.]

Lute: Uhm...Good morning Vaggie? What are you doing here?...

Vaggie: What did you dream about?

Lute: Uh...

Adam: [He slowly wakes up] What's going on now?

Vaggie: Hi Adam.

Adam: Why are you here?

Vaggie: I wanna spend more time with Lute!

Lute: Aww. That's sweet. But i need to take care of my baby. Adam did last time. It's my turn.

Vaggie: She can come too.

[Lute raises a brow to Vaggie's suggestion.]

Lute: Vaggie, I appreciate the enthusiasm, but I don't think taking a baby to do whatever you have planned is a great idea.

[Lute sat up, holding her baby carefully and gently bouncing her.]

Vaggie: But we can go to Lulu world again! She'd love it there!

[Lute raises her eyebrows at Vaggie's suggestion. She couldn't deny that going back to Lulu World would be enjoyable.] Lute: No. I have a newborn!

Vaggie: Or we can go camping somewhere in the outskirts of the ring.

p>Lute: What? A bigger flying demon could pick he rup and carry her away.

p>Vaggie: We can put her in one of those kitty bags. Uh...Kitty purses then.

Adam: Ugh. I'll have maybe Tom babysit her. He's the more trustable one.

Lute: Good idea. But what if she misses us?!

Adam: It'll be fine. Lute. Don't worry.

[Meanwhile out in the lobby.]

Katie: Soo. You kisses me during Sinsmas~

Tom: That was all cus of the mistletoe.

Katie: Suuuree~

Vox: [Teleports into the room.] What'chu watching, Dust?

Angel Dust: Ugh. Im watching something you don't. Now shut up.

Lute: Good morning guys.

Vaggie: [Holds up Aurora] I got the baby! I HAVE THE CHILD NOW!

Aurora: Yaaay!

Adam: Put. My. Child. Down. Now!

Vaggie: [sad] Okay.

Lute: Look, Tom, you will take care of Aurora today. No questions asked.

Tom: Why can't Vox or Lilith do it?

Lute: Cus Momma is busy. And last time Vox took care of her, the Hotel almost burnt down. Katie could take care of my baby, maybe, but she's coming with me and Vaggie. And Angel needs to work today.

Katie: Fuck yes! Sorry. No cursing infront of the baby, i know.

Lute: And Adam is busy too with his "first man" business.

Adam: So you will do it, Tom.

Tom: Fine. Fine. But you'll have to pay me.

Lute: We will. Don't worry. Anyways. Thanks. Byee.

[Lute, Vaggie and Katie leave. Adam leaves the hotel shortly after.]

Angel Dust: Well. Im leaving too.

[A few minutes later. Tom is alone in the Hotel with the baby, cus Vox left too.]

Tom: Well. [He picks up the so precious baby] It's just the two of us here. What do you wanna do?

Aurora: Poony!

Tom: Want to watch ponies?

[Aurora nods happily, Tom sighs at that, but he turns on the tv. And my little pony plays (Goosh, if you guys knew how many PARODIES of that show i used to watch with a straight face as a kid.)]

Aurora: [While watching the show] Neeigh! [She flies around the room] Eeeeiiigh!

Tom: Heh. Guess you're not that bad for a baby. You really take after your mom.

Aurora: Mama! [She lands on the couch.] Ma! Luv mama!

Tom: We all love your mother. Just don't tell her i said that, otherwise, i'll never hear the end of it from Katie. Promise me.

Aurora: [She nods.] Mise!

Tom: Good enough. Say, you hungry?

Aurora: Ye!

Tom: I take that as yes. Soo. What do babies eat?

Aurora: Milkie!

Tom: Okay. Then milk. Wait here. And don't start flying.

[Tom leaves to go to the kitchen, a few minutes later, he comes back only to see Aurora stuck on the chandelier, shaking in fear like a cat.]

Tom: Oh for the sake of- [He gets a ladder and climbs up] Hey, im here, don't be scared. [He uses one hand to hold the ladder, and uses the other to pick her up] It's okay...Im here for you [He climbs down with the baby.]

[A few minutes later, Aurora is drawing on the table.]

Tom: What are you drawing baby? [The sweet adorable baby hides her paper angrily from him.] Okay. No need to show me.

[Another few minutes later.]

Aurora: [Shows a drawing of the two of them] Umcle!

Tom: It's...It's perfect...

Chapter Text

Guuuys, it's my birthday day! Just wanted to share that with you all.
Next chapters coming soon, don't worry, on both this, and on the evil hotel AU too, so don't worry!.
I just wanted to share that it's my birthday! Yayyy!,.

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins with DARKNESS! And in the garden of Eden.]

[The angels then created a planet called Earth, where they produced the first humans, Adam and Lilith.]

Adam: [Narrating] Darkness, was all i saw...Then i opened my eyes...and what i saw...Started my life...

?: Wake up, First Man, Adam.

Adam: What? [He jolts awake. And is surrounded by Animals]

Lilith: [Also wakes up slowly] What?

[Adam and Lilith stare at each other.]

Adam: [Still Narrating] Despite how i act now...I demanded to be in control with Lilith...and it caused her to flee away from me...

[Lilith rejects Adam and runs away. Later; Adam is crying into a deer]

Adam: Im so lonely! Uhuuuu! [He cries and sobs into the deer]

?: Fall asleep...

Adam: Why? I thought i don't reall have to sleep.

?: You'll see.

Adam: I don't really want want to sleep...What are you doing?..

[The figure puts Adam into a sleep]

Adam: Yohooo! [Falls to the ground, asleep]

[The next...day? (I dunno), Adam wakes up, and sees a woman]

Adam: Who are you?

??: I don't even know.

Adam: Hm...That man in the sky said im a man...so uh...

?: She is a woman, like Lilith was.

??: Who's Lilith?

Adam: Nobody important!

[Later, the two are playing with birds.]

Adam: This is called a bird. That's a mouse. That's a tiger.

??: They're cute.

Adam: Hm...Living...Life...Livi...Woman...Wiv...Iviw...EVE!

??: What?

Adam: Your name! It's gonna be Eve!

Eve: You are giving me a name?

Adam: Yes! I hope you like it!

Eve: Yeah. I like it. You must have thought through so much to create that name.

Adam: Phfs. Of course! Im so smart!
[In Adam's mind: She's not catching on...I hope she doesn't figure out i just came up with that name...]

Adam: [Narrating again] But even when i loved her. She went to that tree...And accepted that apple...And caused the fall of humanity. I don't blame everything for it on her. I ate it too. But who knows? Maybe if she didn't take the fruit from Lucifer and...Lilith...I might have not met someone else i love.

[Cut to the hotel]

Aurora: Woah...That's how you lived before mama?

Adam: Yes. So technically...your grandmother is my ex-wife.

Aurora: Yohooo! Im part of a complicated family tree! Yayy!

Adam: [He laughs] Let's get you to bed

Aurora: No! Never!

[Adam scoops up his daughter before she could fly away. Which causes the baby to pout.]

Aurora: I love my dad.

Adam: And he loves you too.

Aurora: But who was "the man in the sky", dad?

Adam: I'll tell you later, okay?

Aurora: A-okay.

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins in Heaven, as Angels fly around and/or talk with each other. It cuts to Carmilla's office.]

Carmilla: For the last time, sweetie, no. Im not bringing you down to Hell.

Clara: Come on mom. Pleaseee? I wanna visit them. It would be fun. And tell them that redemption IS possible!

Carmilla: "Fun" and "Hell" are two words that i wouldn't put in the same sentence.

Clara: Moom...[She pouts]

Carmilla: [She sighs and she looks at her daughter.] Very well-

Clara: Yay!

Carmilla: But. Only if you stay with me. And don't wander off.

Clara: [She rushes and hugs her mom.] Oh, THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! I LOVE YOU MOM!

Carmilla: I love you too. [She holds Clara face to face to herself] But we're only going down there for a few hours.

Clara: I can't wait to tell Lute that her plan in really gonna work!

Carmilla: Just let me remind you, Hell isn't all fun and games. It's full of violent sinners and hellborns.

Clara: I know. But you'll come too! What could go wrong?

Carmila: [She sighs] Odette! Come in here!

Odette: Yes mom?

Carmilla: Me and your sister are going to go down to Hell, and while im gone, you're in charge-

Odette: Hold on. You're taking this haby to Hell of all places?!

Clara: I wanna go! Plus. You and Husk will be able to spend more time together, since mostly, it's me who hangs out with him.

[Odette sighs at Clara.]

Odette: You know what? Fine. Don't get in trouble.

Clara: I won't! Promise!

[Carmilla finally opens a portal to Hell.]

Clara: Woah...Mom, this is so cool! This is gonna be amazing!

Carmilla: Just stay close to me, sweetie. You don't know what these sinners are gonna do.

Clara: Alright. [She holds on to her mother's hand. And soon, the portal closes behind them] Hell is just as I imagined. [She looks around Hell.]

Carmilla: [She holds Clara's hand as they walk around Hell] Most of the sinners here would be happy to kill an angel like us, if given the chance.

Clara: I know mom, i know.

[They walk around Hell.]

Clara: We are lost. Aren't we?

Carmilla: No. We aren't. Hell just got bigger building since the last time i was here.

Clara: When was the last time?

Carmilla: Eh...around 380-390-400 years ago? Take it or leave it. Now where's that hotel? [She looks down to her hand, and sees Clara's missing] WHAT?! Oh no! Nononono! Not my daughter!

[Elsewhere, Clara is skipping around Hell happily. Until she bumps into someone.]

?: Oye! Watch it!

Clara: Sorry. So sorry.

?: Ay. No sinner ever apologises. Who are you?

Clara: Im not supposed to say it to strangers.

?: Well, My name's Valentino, see? Im no stranger anymore.

Clara: Yeah...Maybe. Im Clara.

Valentino: You seem way to young to be down here.

Clara: Im here with my mom.

Valentino: Should have guessed. Where is she?

Clara: Uhm...I don't know...

Valentino: [He raises an eyebrow] You lost her already? You’re way braver than I thought.

Clara: [Looking around nervously] I wasn’t trying to get lost. I just...wanted to look around.

Valentino: You’re in Hell, kid. You don’t just “look around” without anyone trying to fuck you. But hey, lucky for you, I know this place like the back of my hand. [He gestures around] If you need a guide, I’m your guy.

Clara: I’m supposed to stay with my mom. She’s gonna be mad if she finds out I wandered off.

Valentino: Oh, she’ll be fine. Trust me, moms can be a lot scarier than they let on. Now, what’s really got you here, huh? It’s not every day we get an angel wandering around in this neighborhood.

Clara: I'm here to help...to tell sinners like you that redemption is possible!

Valentino: Redemption? Oh armocito, then i know exactly where you wanna go! Lucky for you, my nofriend works there.

Clara: Boyfriend?

[Meanwhile, Carmilla frantically searches for Clara.]

Carmilla: [Calling out towards the daughter she loves.] Clara! CLARA! Where are you?!

[Carmklla mutters under her breath as she flies between the towering structures of Hell, her wings cutting through the dense, sulfurous air. Her worry deepens with every passing second.]

Carmilla: [She's growing more frantic.] Oh, please don't let her get into trouble. Not in this place.

[Back with Clara, Valentino has started leading her through Hell.]

Clara: This place doesn't seem all that bad.

Valentino: [Grinning] Oh, you haven’t even seen the worst of it yet, kid. But don’t worry, I’m not gonna let anything happen to you. You can trust Papito Valentino.

Clara: Papito?

Valentino: Yes. Alot of people call me that. But hey, you don't have to.

[As they continue deeper into the heart of Hell?]

Clara: [Quietly to herself] I hope mom finds me soon....

Valentino: Trust me, she will.

[Meanwhile, Carmilla finally spots Valentino’s silhouette in the distance. She gasps, realizing that her daughter might be in more danger than she thought.]

Carmilla: [To herself] Clara. [She speeds up, her wings fluttering more urgently as she races toward them.] CLARA! Get away from him!

[Clara hears her mom’s voice and looks back in surprise.]

Clara: Momma!

Carmilla: [Landing between Clara and Valentino] Let my daughter go, Sinner!

Valentino: [Laughing] Oh, don't worry, i didn't harm her.

Clara: He was taking me to the hotel, he said his boyfriend works at Lute's hotel.

Carmilla: [Turning to Clara] You’ve got to trust me, sweetie. Some people are not meant to be around you.

Valentino: [Shrugs] Im not that bad. Unlike some other someone i know.

Carmilla: [Sighing in relief] Are you okay?

Clara: [Nods] Yeah... I’m okay, mom. But, um... you really don't like him, huh?

Carmilla: [Softly] Not at all, sweetie. And you should stay away from people like him. They can be... dangerous.

Valentino: Offended. [He sees Carmilla staring at him.] Okay. Okay. I'll leave. Sheesh. [He walks off.]

Carmilla: Sweetie. Listen, we’re not here to fix people like him.

Clara: But he seems like he can be fixed.

[The two share a quiet moment.]

Carmilla: Come on, let’s go to that Hotel to tell Lute her plan works.

Clara: [Excitedly] Yay! We'll make Lute so happy!

Carmilla: [She chuckles] One step at a time, sweetie. We can talk about the rest later.

Clara: Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Im serious now! [She puts on a serious face.]

Carmilla: That's not serious. It's adorable.

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins at the hotel, it is Valentines day at the Hotel, that same hotel is decorated matching to the Valentines day theme.]

Lute: Adaaam! Happy Valentines day!

Vaggie: Happy Valentines day to you too baby.

As always, Angel dust is flirting with Husk, Charlie and Vaggie are matching clothes, etc.the hotel is decorated and love is in the air!

Katie: What's wrong gas mask? No date?~

Tom: Fuck off Kate,

Vaggie: Wohoo! ITS VALENTINES DAY!! And im single! Yayy!

Lute: Why are you happy about that? If i can ask?

Vaggie: Means i can kill more roaches and bugs without interruptions. Tho i do want to date someone...Hm.

Adam: And she's thinking about it. Maybe being single isn't so bad for her? Maybe she's-No, she is not.

Lute: Here, Adam, hold this for me~ [She hands chocolates to Adam.]

Adam: Okay. [He keeps the chocolates close, protecting them, before he realizes] Oh shit!

Angel Dust: [Plops onto the couch] Ugh.

Vaggie: Single too?

Angel Dust: Yup.

Lilith: Mind if i join?

Vaggie: Nope. We don't mind, come on your highness.

[Meanwhile, Vox is about to get out of the hotel]

Katie: Where you going?

Vox: Oh to see my boyfriend! Who, and where else?

[And with that, Vox leaves. And after some walking, he arrives at Val's home.] And enters without knocking.]

Valentino: WHAT THE FUCK DID I SAY ABOUT KNOCK-Oh hey Voxxy~ I thought you were someone else. Didn't mean to yell. Im just having a hard day, full of things. You know?

Vox: Full of what things?

Valentino: Oh you know. White stu-

Vox: Woah, woah, woah, woah, sir, kids are reading this too. Probably not. Soo.

Valentino: Will you help me calm down?

Vox: Fine. But, you owe me one.

[Valentino smirks, setting down his glass as Vox steps inside, closing the door behind him.]

Valentino: Oh, Voxxy, you know I always pay my debts~

Vox: Yeah, yeah, keep telling yourself that.

[Vox moves over to the couch, flopping down next to Valentino, who immediately drapes an arm around him.]

Valentino: So, how’s the hotel? Still a circus?

Vox: More or less. It’s Valentine’s Day, so everyone’s either being disgustingly romantic or pathetically single.

Valentino: Ha! Lemme guess, Angel’s in the latter group?

Vox: Oh, absolutely. He looked like someone ran over his dog.

[Valentino chuckles, taking a sip of his drink before setting it down and turning to Vox.]

Valentino: And what about you, babe? You ain't lookin' all that love-drunk yourself.

Vox: Please. I don’t do all that mushy crap.

Valentino: Oh? Then what’s this? [He gestures between them.]

Vox: This? This is me keeping my unhinged boyfriend from spiraling. Totally different.

Valentino: Aww, so you do care.

Vox: Don’t push it.

[Valentino leans in with a grin, pressing a kiss to Vox’s cheek. Vox rolls his eyes but doesn’t pull away.]

Valentino: Y’know, if you ever did wanna do somethin’ disgustingly romantic, I wouldn’t mind.

Vox: I’ll keep that in mind. Maybe next century.

Valentino: Aww. But i wanna do it now~

[Meanwhile, back at the hotel, the single squad-Vaggie, Angel Dust, and Lilith are sitting on the couch, watching bad romance movies.]

Angel Dust: Ugh, this is so unrealistic. No one falls in love that fast. I mean, I knew the cat for so long, HE fell inlove, with ME, totally different.

Vaggie: Yeah, right? If someone confessed to me like that, I’d assume they were trying to scam me with stuff.

Lilith: I dunno, I think it’s sweet.

Vaggie & Angel: Well we don't.

[Lute walks past Adam, who is still holding onto the chocolates she gave him earlier.]

Lute: You’re still holding those?

Adam: You entrusted them to me. I have a duty now. I must protect this, and the baby.

[Lute snickers at that, taking one of the chocolates from the box and popping it into her mouth.]

Lute: Well, at least you take your duties seriously, soldier.

Adam: Damn right. This chocolate is under my protection.

[Meanwhile, back on the couch, the single squad is deep into their movie marathon. Angel Dust groans loudly, throwing popcorn at the screen.]

Angel Dust: Oh, come on! There’s no way she forgives him that fast! He literally ran over her dog two scenes ago!

Vaggie: Right?! And now she’s marrying him?? I hate this.

Lilith: It’s fiction. Let people dream.

[Back at Valentino's place, Vox is still lounging, pretending that he’s not enjoying himself, he does, he definitely does. Valentino, however, is clearly amused, he is leaning againts Vox.]

Valentino: Sooo… any plans after this?

Vox: Depends. You gonna get all sentimental on me?

Valentino: Heh. You wish. But nah, just thought maybe we could hit up a club or somethin’.

Vox: Hmph. Maybe. If you don’t annoy me first.

Valentino: Oh, babe, you love when I annoy you.

[Vox groans, but there’s the tiniest hint of a smirk on his face. Valentino catches it but doesn’t say a word—he just enjoys his small victory.]

[Back at the hotel. Aurora crawls towards Lilith, and pulls on her skirt.]

Lilith: Aww. Hi baby. How are you? My one, true, love.

Angel Dust: [Gasps dramatically] You traitor. You said you're single!

Lilith: I'm not! I have this baby to love and care for! I am sorry.

Vaggie: We shall disband!

[The three walk different ways. But sit back on the couch a minute later.]

Vaggie: Disbanding isn't a fun thing...

Angel Dust: I have no idea where to go. And Val said there's no work today. Sooo.

Lilith: Guess we’re stuck with each other then.

Angel Dust: Ugh, fine. But I’m picking the next movie, and it better not be another sappy trash fire.

Lilith: No promises.

[Vaggie sighs, stretching her arms before slumping back into the couch.]

Vaggie: Y’know, maybe being single isn’t so bad.

Angel Dust: Maybe. But it’s still annoying watching everyone be all goo-goo eyes at each other.

Lilith: It’s Valentine’s Day, what did you expect?

[Meanwhile, Adam is still standing in the hallway, cradling the chocolates like they’re precious treasure. Lute stops, and sighs with a smile.]

Lute: Adam, you can put those down now.

Adam: Never.

Lute: They’re chocolates, not a royal heir.

Adam: Exactly. They deserve my most respect.

[Lute laughs, finally taking the box from his hands and shaking her head.]

Lute: You’re such a dork.

Adam: And yet you love this dork.

Katie: Aww. When't wedding?~

Tom: Hope itnwill have alcohol in it.

Katie: You read my mind.

[Lute just smirks, popping another chocolate into her mouth before strolling off, leaving Adam to contemplate his life choices.]

Adam: Wait up babe! [He runs after Lute.]

[Back at Valentino’s place, the atmosphere is much more relaxed. Vox is scrolling through his phone while Valentino is draped across the couch, looking at him with a lazy smirk.]

Valentino: Sooo… club or nah?

Vox: Still thinking about it.

Valentino: Booooring. We could just stay in, y’know? Enjoy each other’s company.

Vox: And by that you mean?

Valentino: [Grinning] Wouldn’t you like to know?

[Vox stares at him for a long moment before sighing.]

Vox: You just had to ruin the moment, didn’t you?

Valentino: What can I say? It’s a talent of mine.

[Vox shakes his head. He sets his phone down and leans back into the couch, glancing over at Valentino.]

Vox: Fine. We’ll stay in. But if you start getting too sentimental, I’m leaving.

Valentino: Baby, I am always sentimental.

[Vox just groans, but he doesn’t move away from Val. And speaking of Valentino. What does he think? He takes that as a win.]

[Back at the hotel, the single squad is on their third bad romance movie, and Vaggie is clearly losing it.]

Vaggie: WHY IS SHE FORGIVING HIM AGAIN?! HE CHEATED ON HER WITH HER OWN SISTER!

Angel Dust: I dunno, babe, but at this point, I’m invested.

[Lilith just laughs as the other two dramatically groan and toss popcorn at the screen.]

Katie: Oh wow. How dramatic this valentines day is.

Tom: Couldn't say i'm suprised.

Adam: Lute, i wrote you a song in honor of our relationship.

Lute: Oh? You wrote me a song? Now, this I gotta hear.

Adam: [Clears throat, dramatically pulling out a small notebook.] Ahem. Prepare yourself for the masterpiece of the century.

Lute: [Grinning] I’m so prepared. Hit me with it.

[Adam takes a deep breath, then begins strumming an invisible guitar like he’s performing on a grand stage.]

Adam: 🎵Lute, I think you're really cute. I'll stab anyone that hurts you. I really love ya'. Maybe we can go out and eat or something...🎵

[Lute stares at him for a moment, blinking in disbelief before bursting into laughter.]

Lute: Oh my god, Adam! That was amazing-and also mildly concerning!

Adam: [Proudly] Right? I worked so hard on it.

[Lute is practically wheezing at this point, clutching her sides as she laughs.]

Lute: Adam, that was beautiful. I feel so honored.

Adam: You should be. Took me a whole five minutes to write. That’s dedication.

Lute: Truly, the peak of romance. [She playfully ruffles his hair, and Adam puffs up with pride.]

Somewhere in the background, Katie and Tom are eavesdropping, Katie dramatically wipes away a fake tear.]

Katie: That was so beautiful, babe. True poetry.

Adam: [Smugly] I know, right?

Tom: I don’t know whether to be impressed or deeply concerned.

Lute: It’s Adam. You should always be at least a little concerned.

[Adam just grins, clearly pleased with himself. Lute shakes her head with a smile, popping another chocolate into her mouth.]

Adam: Gimmie chocolate. Now.

Lute: What's the magic word?

Adam: [He sighs] Ugh. Fine. [He gives puppy dog eyes to Lute] Pleaseee?

Lute: Aww. [She hands him a chocolate box.] I love you.

Adam: I know. I love you too. Cus like. There's the proof of it. [He points his thumb at Aurora, who's sucking on her sock.]

[Chapter ends here.]

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins in the Hoteeeel. Everyone is sitting at the couches, the group finally collected evryone in the Canon universe]

C! Angel: So what you're saying is. Is that; We aren't from this universe? And that we somehow ended up here? And that Lute of all people is Nice now?

C! Charlie: This is alot to take in, i know.

C! Husk: Do you have Beer?

A! Tom: Here.

A! Angel: [He enters the room with a coffee mug] Hey ya'll. What did i miss- [He notices Canon Husk and his pupils dilate] HUSK! [He tackles C! Husk] Oh, i missed you, but like, so much. Never leave me again, please.

C! Husk: You got it all wrong. I'm not your-

[A! Angel starts crying and whining]

C! Niffty: Oh wow. Not a abd boy, i kinda wished Angel was atleast a bad boy here.

A! Vaggie: He killed lpts of exorcists. Haha.

A! Angel: I missed you, big fella....

A! Lute: Let him be. I think he needs it. You don't know what happened to him.

C! Husk: [He sighs and looks around awkwardly] Uh... okay, kid. Just-ease up a little, yeah?

A! Angel: [He sniffles, still clinging to Husk] You don’t understand… You were-[He continues crying]

C! Husk: [His ear flicks, looking uncomfortably at the others] Uh, yeah… I-I'm sorry?

A! Adam: Angel, I think we should talk about this later. Remember, this isn’t our Husk.

A! Angel: [He finally lets go, and wipes his eyes] Y-Yeah… I know. [He looks at C! Husk, eyes full of longing] Just… sorry.

C! Husk: [Grumbling] It’s fine, I guess. Not every day you get tackled by some… alternate version of your friend? [He rubs his temples] This whole thing is giving me a headache.

A! Lute: [Crosses arms] Yeah, well, you better get used to it. You're all stuck here.

C! Angel: Okay, so let’s get this straight. You guys-[gestures at the alternate versions]-are us, but from another universe?

A! Tom: Pretty much.

C! Charlie: [Sits down, exhaling] And your universe is… different?

A! Lute: Very different.

C! Charlie: Different how?

A! Lute: [Quietly] Different in ways you don’t wanna know. But look, we'll get you back home.

C! Husk: [He scoffs] Great. And how exactly do you plan on doing that?

A! Lute: [She shrugs] We’re working on it.

C! Vaggie: So... Lute is nice now? Adam is basically me. And you two are basically us. How does that even work?

A! Lute: Yeah, yeah. I get it.

A! Angel: [He still wipes his eyes] This is so weird. So, what, we just sit here and wait for you guys to figure out how to fix this? So i don't have to watch Husk's face that isn't ours...

A! Tom: Pretty much. Unless you wanna help.

C! Charlie: Actually, yes. We should. If we all work together, maybe we can speed this up.

A! Angel: [He finally sits down.] …Yeah. I’ll help.

A! Lute: Yayy. So cool. Teamwork!

C! Charlie: Yeah. I love teamwork!

C! Vaggie: [She crosses her arms] Alright, but where do we even start? I mean, if this kind of thing just happened, how do we even undo it? I don't wanna be in one place with any version of Adam and/or Lute.

A! Adam: Well, we have some theories. But it’s complicated. Our Vaggie knows more about this.

C! Charlie: Really?

A! Vaggie: [She rushes inside] Yeah! I have theories! THEORIES! [She pulls out a board of her theories.]

A! Vaggie: First, we need to figure out why this happened. Some kind of rift opened up between our worlds, and until we figure out what caused it, we can’t send anyone back.

A! Katie: That is actually smart.

A! Vaggie: I know.

C! Charlie: So, some kind of anomaly?

A! Lute: Bingo.

A! Vaggie: And the sooner we track it down, the better.

C! Husk: Let me guess, this is gonna involve a lot of running around, investigating weird crap, and no drinking.

C! Angel: You know, I could totally have you, me, and other version of me do something while the others go around-

A! Adam, A! Angel, & C! Vaggie: No.

C! Angel: [He pouts] Fiiine.

C! Charlie: [Determined] Alright. If this is happening, then let’s do it right. Let’s figure out what’s messing with our universes and fix it.

A! Lute: That’s the spirit. Now, let’s get to work.

Chapter Text

Soooo, Let me explain myself, to why i'm not posting much, with the rate i'm doing the stories and why i don't post much. Abd the priority i'm doing the stories are.:

1. The Messy au. First book, first priority, started my adventures on AO3.

2. Is the svtfoe x RC9GN. Yeah, surprise. This is a crossover i've wanted to make since a long time, well, since rewatching the show.

3. Is the Vaggie meets the sins. Cus, you know, DUH. I don't post on the chapter because i'm pre-writing the stories.

4. Is the Helluva AU story. New book, new priority, yeah, but i always focus on the newer stuff.

And 5th. Is the Charlie's Evil Hotel. It's an au i don't always take too seriously.

This explanations are posted to all my stories.

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins with Adam waking up in his room.]

Adam: Ah, what a great morning. [He notices that Lute isn't in bed] Huh, I guess she woke up early. Classic Lute.

[Adam gets dressed up and leaves his room, only to find the Hotel peaceful]

Adam: Weird. Things aren't usually calm around here.

[Adam goes into the kitchen, and sees Vaggie peacefully making food.]

Adam: Since when are you so not energetic?

Vaggie: What do you mean? I'm always calm.

Adam: No you're not, you're always jumping around.

Vaggie: That is so baby stuff. Anyways, move along. I gotta make breakfast.

[Adam leaves the kitchen, then he sees Angel and Katie, talking peacefully]

Angel Dust: And so, I told her; "Gurl, you couldn't even hit me if you tried", then, she tried to hit me, but she missed.

Katie: Hah! So funny.

Adam: The fuck? Why are you two so peaceful?! Why aren't you ripping out each others hairs like you usally do?!

Angel Dust: We never do that, Adam, we are always talking like this.

Katie: Yes. We believe talking things out is the right way to go.

Adam: I'm going crazy... [He walks away and runs into Lute] Lutey! Honey. Weird day huh?

Lute: Oh, hey Adam.

Adam: Seriously? You too? No "Hi sweet baby, my one true love"?

Lute: Nah. I grew out of that stuff.

Adam: [He panics and runs around the hallways] What is happening to me?!

Tom: Need a drink?

Adam: Yes!

[Tom hands Adam a drink]

Adam: What happened here?!

Tom: Oh, Lilith fucked up her spell and switched everyone's personalities.

Adam: In that 1 hour i was sleeping? Wait. If everyone's personalities are swapped, why are you the same?

Tom: What is... "Personality"?

Adam: Ah. Okay. Okay. I get it now. That means Lute is all calm and not optimistic now?

Tom: Yeah. And Vaggie is calm, Katie's not into sexual jokes, and Angel is also now a peaceful hippie.

Adam: What about Vox?

Tom: Oh... You don't wanna know. But I can show you.

[Tom leads Adam to the hotel lounge, where Vox is sitting on a couch, holding a microphone, and talking to the others.]

Vox: Hey hey, gang! Welcome to the first ever; "Vox's Variety Hour!" Today, as a afirst topic, we're gonna talk about the power of friendship and positivity!

Adam: What. The. Fuck.

Tom: Yeah, so, uh… He’s a motivational speaker now.

Adam: [He's staring at this in horror] I think I preferred him when he was all; smug, power-hungry, and a bastard.

Vox: And remember, folks, always believe in yourself! Because you are the star of your own show!

Adam: Tell. Lilith. To. Fix. This!

Tom: Relax. Lilith said the spell should wear off in a few hours.

Adam: A few hours?! I can’t survive a whole morning with this! I’m not surviving this.

[The kitchen door opens]

Vaggie: Who wants some original food? I made the recipes myself!

Tom: Oh fuck... This *is* terrible. Vags never makes her own recipe, she just... Steals some!

Adam: This is gonna be a nightmare. Never thought i'd ever say this. But. Glad you're here, and that you have no personality.

Tom: [He is being sarcastic, duh] Wow. Thanks so much.

Katie: We're not being nightmares. We's just from Detroit.

Tom: Oh not you! That joke- No! Ah. Katie would never say that! Uugh!

Adam: i feel your pain, buddy.

[Adam sits down, as he watches Vox enthusiastically high-five Angel.]

Adam: [He groans] Okay, I changed my mind. Somebody knock me out until this is over.

Lute: Oh, come on, Adam, they are not that bad.

Adam: Not that bad?! Lute, I just saw Vox high-five Angel without a hint of aggression!

Angel Dust: Hey, man, positive energy is contagious! You should try it!

Adam: [He grabs Tom by the shoulders and shakes him] Knock me out. Right now.

Tom: I mean, I could, I would, but then you'd miss Vaggie’s... uh, “original” breakfast.

Vaggie: [She holds up a plate] That’s right! It's purely original!

Adam: [He stares at the plate in horror] ...Vaggie. This is a crime.

Vaggie: Pfft, you just have an unrefined taste.

Katie: [smiling] We should all be open to new experiences!

Adam: NO. NO WE SHOULD NOT. THIS IS AN EXPERIENCE I DO NOT WANT.

[Vox suddenly claps his hands, abd everyone looks at him]

Vox: Alright, everyone! Group hug time! Come on, bring it in!

[Everyone happily gathers around for a hug. Adam and Tom look at this horrified]

Adam: I'm gonna scream.

Tom: Do it. I’ll join you.

[The two take a deep breath- but then Lilith walks in]

Lilith: Oh hey, looks like the spell’s about to wear off.

[Suddenly, everyone freezes mid-hug, their eyes glowing briefly before shaking their heads.]

Angel Dust: [He is. Disgusted] Why the fuck am I touching Katie?!

Katie: [Gagging] Ew, ew, EW! Never again! Ew. Physical contact with other people.

Vaggie: [She stares at her plate] ...What the hell did I just make?!

Adam: [He collapses onto the couch] Oh, thank Satan.

[Vox, now back to his usual self, glares at everyone.]

Vox: What the actual fuck just happened?

Tom: You became a motivational speaker for a few hours.

Vox: [He starts screaming] NO!

Adam: [He sighs with relief] Never thought I’d say this, but... I missed this madness.

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins in a court room, for some odd reason.]

Lilith: Alright. What are the problems here?

Adam: That she is cheating on me!

Lilith: What?

Lute: I didn't do jack shit!

Adam: Let me tell you what happened. I came home after shopping, and then, i see Lute on the bed, the window open, and I see Susan of all sinners, running out in the streets. So, I took the bedside table, and threw it at her! I know Lute's cheating on me. Even after everything we've done together.

Lute: That isn't how things happened.

Lilith: Then what happened?

Lute: You know hot things can get down here, so i opened the window, but it was still hot in the room, i didn't know what to do anymore! And a few moments later, all I see is Adam barging in, picking up the bedside table, and throwing it out!

Lilith: Now let's hear the one you hit. Susan?

Susan: I was out on my daily walk, minding my own business, taking out my dog, shit talking Rosie, then a table hits me from the sky.

Lilith: We're not getting anywhere with this. Let's hear the crown witness.

[Everyone looks into one direction, and sees Tom standing there]

Tom: I don't even fucking know what happened, I was just in my room, doing the dirty with Katie- I mean- No.

Lilith: Tom, let’s try this again. What did you see?

Tom: Right. So, I was, uh… preoccupied, but then I heard yelling. I look out the door, and bam! There’s a bedside table flying past. Then Adam’s screaming, Lute’s screaming, and Susan’s on the ground cursing everyone’s existence.

Lilith: That does not help.

Adam: [He crosses his arms] It proves my point!

Lute: It proves nothing! It just proves that Adam is a lunatic who loves to throw furniture!

Susan: Which, by the way, I would like financial compensation for! My dog ran off!

Lilith: Oh, for fuck's sake. Look, I don’t care about your relationship drama. Here’s what we’re gonna do. Adam, no more throwing furniture. Lute, maybe don’t look suspicious on the bed with the window open. Susan, stop being outside at unfortunate times. Tom… just shut up.

Tom: Harsh.

Lilith: Case closed.

[Everyone groans as the court dismisses.]

Chapter Text

Lute: Look, Vox, I mean this in the nicest way possible, but are you sure we need more help? I appreciate you helping us with the stuff tho. Really.

Vox: Are you saying i'm no use to you?

Lute: No, of course not. It's just-

Vox: SPLENDID!

Lute: O.. Kaaay...

[Later, Vox is about to burn some radios, but Lute and Adam stop him before he can do anything]

Adam: What the fuck are you doing?!

Vox: What does it look like i'm doing? Burning some filthy things.

Adam: No. You won't! You will do no such things.

Vox: And why is that?

Adam: Because-

Lute: Sweetie, let me talk. Okay, ummm, first off, word of advice, don't burn things, atleast not infront of the hotel. And second, don't... burn stuff?

Vox: Ugh. [He drops the radio he has in his hand] Great.

Vaggie: Does this mean I have to put these back to where I took them from?

Vox: Yes, darling.

Vaggie: Ah shucks.

Vox: [He sighs dramatically] You know, sometimes I wonder if I'm the only one around here with any common sense.

Adam: Common sense?! Common sense?! By that you mean burning radios?!

Vox: Exactly, my darling.

Lute: Or.... Maybe we can find another way to channel your... uh... What do i call this? Enthusiasm? You’ve been so helpful, but the whole "burning things" thing? Isn't the exact vibe we’re going for today.

Vox: Fine, fine. I suppose I can try to... contain myself. For now.

Lute: I'll take that as a "yes, I will listen"

Adam: [He looks at Lute] Are you sure it’s still a good idea?

Lute: Come oon, i'm sure he won't burn more stuff. [She looks at Vox] Riight?

Vox: Of course not.

Adam: [He raises an eyebrow] That didn’t sound convincing at all.

Vox: Oh, relax. I’ll keep my passions in check. Temporarily.

Lute: Define "temporarily."

Vox: Until I’m bored. Or something annoys me. Whichever comes first.

Vaggie: So… ten minutes?..

Vox: Harsh, but fair.

[Lute sighs and pinches the bridge of her nose.]

Lute: Okay, new rule; no fires, no explosions... Atleast not without asking me or Adam first.

Vox: So many rules. I feel like I’m being oppressed.

Vaggie: You are.

Adam: [To Lute] I’m giving it three hours before something’s on fire.

Vox: I’ll take that bet.

[Cut to later that day, Lute is at the front desk going through some papers.]

Vox: Soo... What exactly is the plan for today? Because if it’s paperwork and sorting cables, I might actually combust from sheer boredom.

Lute: We’ve got a delivery coming in, Tom's room lights needs rewiring.

Vox: Sounds riveting. Truly. You sure you don’t want me to just blow the whole system up and start fresh?

Adam: We’ve told you. No blowing things up. So you will listen.

Vaggie: [She walks in with a box] Good news! I found the source of the weird humming sound on the fifth floor.

Lute: Oh finally. What was it?

Vaggie: It was a rat, I named him Waldo.

Lute: Vix, you should go rewire the light in Tom's room. I can't stand his complaining.

Vox: I'd rather combust.

Adam: That can be arranged.

Vox: Sounds like you adore me.

Adam: No.

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins with Katie bursting into the hotel, all confident, and definetly not high.]

Katie: [She holds her hand out to Tom] Gimmie high five.

Tom: Are you high?

Katie: Me? Neveeeer... Hehe... [She points at a wall] Look! A pony!~

Tom: Yeah. You definetly are high. But atleast you look positive.

Katie: I'm really not in the mood for this. [She snatches a bottle from the bar] You just leave me the fuck alone and go back to fucking- or... Whatever the fuck you do!

Tom: Are you okay?

Katie: [Suddenly bursts out crying, and collapses onto the couch] Noooo!

[Tom sighs in annoyance, and sadness, and sits next to Katie]

Tom: Do you wanna talk about it?

Katie: No... Yes...

Tom: So what happened?

Katie: It's that I started to believe Lute's plan actually works! I believe in somebody other than myself! Can you believe this?!

Tom: [Laughs a bit] Crazy. I know.

Katie: Don't laugh, you goof.

Tom: Goof?! Fuck you, you're the ine high right now!

Katie: No you!

Tom: I'm not high right now.

Katie: Fuck you then...

Tom: Alright. But tell me more.

Katie: If I believe in these stupid dumb plans. That means everything i've been saying will be seen as dumb! And hypocritical. And to be honest, if I can go to Heaven... I wanna go with you.

Tom: Wait what?..

Katie: I wanna go to Heaven with you?..

Tom: [He looks genuinly shocked] Seriously?

Katie: Uh-huh...

Tom: The fuck are you talking about? I'm never going to Heaven.

Katie: You miiight. Can you get me more of this drink? It' so goooood.

Tom: That's just water...

Katie: Oh... Can you get me more?

Tom: Hah. Sure.

Katie: I'd be very sad if you off yourself you know? Like. You're one of the only people I like here. And-

Tom: Why would I even do that?..

Katie: I... Don't know. You're always inportant to someone.

[Tom pauses, holding the water bottle he got for Katie.]

Tom: That's... Actually kinda sweet.

Katie: I'm sweet. Like honey. Or like... Revenge on a rainy Tuesday. Hehehehe.

Tom: [He chuckles] You really are high.

Katie: Shut uuup. I'm being serious! I just... I don’t want to be alone when the Hell goes poof, you know?

Tom: Yeah. I know. [He hands her the water, and she sips it like it's the finest wine.]

Katie: I used to think caring made me weak. Now it’s making me... tired.

Tom: Caring does make you tired. But it also makes you human.

Katie: Gross. We're in Hell, baby boy.

Tom: Yeah- First off. Don't call me that. And two, it kinda is.

[They sit in silence for a minute.]

Katie: Do you think Lute's plan will actually work?

Tom: I think if you believe in it... it already is.

Katie: Don’t get all fortune-cookie on me, asshole.

Tom: Sorry.

Katie: You’re such a dork, bitch.

Tom: And you’re a fucking mess.

[Katie leans her head on his shoulder, half-laughing, half-crying.]

Katie: Deal with it.

Tom: I always do.

[They sit there together for another few minutes of silence.]

Katie: You're the worst emotional support ever, by the way.

Tom: Yeah? Well, you’re the worst drunk I’ve ever met.

Katie: I’m not drunk. I’m… enlightened. Spiritually blasted. You know?

Tom: You smell like a mix of regret and cherry vodka.

Katie: That’s my new perfume. It's limited edition.

Tom: You ever think we’re just... stalling? All of us? Waiting for something we know won’t come?

Katie: Like salvation? Or pizza delivery?

Tom: Either, honestly.

Katie: I used to think I’d get out. That there was a key somewhere, like in a dream. Now I’m just hoping I don’t forget who I am in all this.

Tom: You’re loud enough as it is already. I don’t think anyone could forget you. I know I won't...

Katie: That’s not what I mean... But thanks. I think.. [She closes her eyes, still leaning on Tom's shoulder.]

Katie: If this all goes to shit, promise me something?

Tom: Depends what it is.

Katie: Don’t let me turn into one of them... The ones who... stop feeling.

Tom: You already cry at weird times and yell at walls. I think you’re safe.

Katie: Tom!

Tom: Okay, okay. I promise. [He hesitates, then he puts an arm around her, awkward but sincere.]

Tom: Just don’t drag me down with you, alright?

Katie: No promises by me, gas mask.

Tom: And here I thought you forgot that nickname...

[They sit quietly again...]

Katie: ...Do you think Heaven even wants us?

Tom: Maybe not. But if we kick the door hard enough, maybe it'll let us in just to shut us up.

Katie: Heh. That’s the best plan I’ve heard all day.

[Chapter ends here.]

Chapter Text

[Chapter begins in hotel, little decorations everywhere, and everyone is sitting on the couch in the lobby, and Lute is giving her speech.]

Lute: Alright gang. I know. I know. Don't say it. "Mother’s Day? Seriously Lute? It's Hell". I know it's not a holiday many celebrate in Hell… but I thought maybe, since my mom is here, we can suprise her. And i'm a mom too, so you can suprise me. Since you're all my babies.

Angel Dust: Since when are we your babies?

Lute: [She leans close to Angel] Since I let you live in my Hotel. [She pinches Angel's cheek with a smile, then let's go of his face] Alright. Let's make this the best mother's day ever!

[Cut to a bit later. Lute is putting up decorations in the lobby, and hangs a banner that reads: “For my momma". But theen, Adam walks in]

Adam: What is going in here?

Lute: Oh right. You overslept again.

Adam: I had to take care of our baby for 2 days while you were busy, of course I will oversleep.

Lute: We, mostly me, are planning a mother's day suprise!

Adam: Oh...

Lute: I know most of us don’t have mothers down here-or good memories of them- but maybe we can celebrate with each other.

Katie: So we’re honoring bad parenting with cake?

Angel Dust: Speak for yourself. My Ma made killer meatballs when she was alive.

Lute: Hmmm... Now that I think about it...

[Lute looks at the group together. Alot of them have "Momless above their heads with arrows pointing at them through Lute's eyes]

Lute: Oh no...

[Meanwhile, up in Heaven]

Clara: ODETTEEEEE! ODETTE. ODETTE. ODETTE!

Odette: What is it?

Clara: Mother's day! We need to give a gift to mom! ASAP.

Odette: I already got her a gift. And let me guess. You forgot.

Clara: Of course I forgot! I always do! Why can't I just mark my calendar? Hm. That i'll never know. But still. I need to get her something.

Odette: You know mom doesn't need gifts.

Clara: Then why did YOU get a gift for her?

Odette: Cus i wanted to.

Clara: Obviously not to become the favorite child.

Odette: Oh please.

[Back down in Hell~]

Adam: [He picks up the daughter that he loves dearly] Alright baby. What'chu get for your mama?

[Aurora haplily holds up a drawing, like it's a piece of art (Everyone knows baby drawings are pieces of art. Who doesn't know that?)]

Adam: Aww. How sweet. You make this for mom? It's beautiful. I'm sure she'll just love it.

[Lute walks over and kneels down to look at the drawing too.]

Lute: Is that me fighting a dragon while holding a baby?

Aurora: [She nods proudly] And the baby is me! And the dragon is a bad guy!

Lute: I love it. This is going on the fridge. [She holds it like a treasure.]

[Vaggie walks by holding a box of decorations.]

Vaggie: Lute, are we putting up the glitter streamers or the flame-proof ones?

Lute: Flame-proof. Cus we have a baby in here.

[Back up in Heaven~]

Odette: [Now wrapping her gift] I got Mom a book. “100 Ways to Relax When Your Children aren't relaxed.”

Clara: Okay, okay, okay, wait! What if I write her a song? Or-bake something? Or steal Odette’s gift and rewrap it?

Odette: I will smite you if you touch this box.

Clara: Fine! Maybe I’ll just descend and give her a hug. Personal. Sweet. No smiting needed! [She motices a certain cat flying by sadly] Hm? [She flies after that cat]

[And a bit later. Husk sits and a bench, alone]

Clara: You okay, Husk?

Husk: What? Me? I'm finee.

Clara: Really? Because you seem so sad.

Husk: It's just that... You know. My mom doesn't know i'm in Heaven, not yet. I was too scared to even face her. She still thinks i'm down in Hell.

Clara: Aw. Don't worry, i'm shre she'd love to see you again. I just know it.

[Clara sits beside him gently, giving Husk a warm, comforting smile.]

Clara: Why don’t you write her a letter? Tell her everything you wish you could say. Sometimes... even if we can't deliver it right away, saying it helps.

Husk: [He stares at the ground, ears twitching slightly] Maybe. I don’t know if I have the words anymore.

Clara: Then start small. “Hi, Mom.” That’s how all the best letters start.

[Back in the Hotel, Vaggie is decorating the cupcakes with way too much frosting and putting little candy flames on top.]

Vaggie: They’re inferno themed! Isn't that cute?

Vox: [Peering over her shoulder] Quite adorable. If we’re trying to give everyone a sugar-induced coma, we are succeeding marvelously.

Vaggie: Then they're perfect! I'm gonna give one to mom.

Vox: You don't have a mom down here.

Vaggie: I know. I'm gonna put this away, and then give them to Valentino.

Vox: Why would you think he is your mom?

Vaggie: Cus you're like my dad. And that means, he is my mom now. So after this. I'm giving some of these to him.

Vox: Okay. You do you. [He turns away and walks off. But he is infact touched by her words] She thinks i'm her dad...

Lute: Alright! We’ve got cupcakes, glitter that hopefully won’t combust. Now all we need is my mom.

[The hotel is looking unusually festive. There are flowers that are mostly fireproof, and some heart-shaped cookies. Lute is wearing a glittery sash that says “#1 Mom,” clearly made by Aurora.]

Lilith: What is going on here?

Lute: Mom! You're here!

Lilith: Of course i'm here. I live here after all. And I only went out for a run. What happened here?

Lute: You forgot today. Didn't you?

Lilith: Today?... Oh shit. It's mother's day!

Adam: Guess I wasn't the only one who forgot.

Lilith: Shut up, Adam.

[Lute throws her arms around her mother.]

Lute: Happy Mother’s Day, Mommy.

[Meanwhile, Adam is awkwardly holding a party hat in one hand and a plate of cookies in the other.]

Adam: [To himself] I don’t even know what I’m doing. I hate glitter. But... she looks happy.

[Aurora runs up and hands Lilith a second drawingthis one with three stick figures: Lute, Aurora, and her grandma, all smiling.]

Aurora: Best grandma ever!

Lilith: Is that supposed to be me? I look fierce. And very hot.

Aurora: You are fierce, grandma!

Lute: Alright everyone! Cupcake time!

[Back in Heaven. Clara hands Husk a small envelope.]

Clara: If you want, I’ll deliver this when you’re ready.

Husk: ...Thanks, Clara. But I think i'll give it to her myself.

Clara: That's my favorite cat! [She floats up and starts to head back, waving at him.] You’re braver than you think. Don't worry about anything anymore up here! Buy gold. Byeee! [Flies off]

[Cut to Lute, finally sitting down with her daughter in her lap, surrounded by friends, her mom sipping tea, decorations everywhere—imperfect, colorful, chaotic, and perfect.]

Lute: Best. Mother’s Day. Ever.

[Back up in Heaven.]

Clara: Odette. I got the perfect gift for mom!

Odette: What did you get?

Clara: I wrote her a poem! Wanna hear it?

Odette: Oh no.

Clara: Ahem! “Roses are holy, violets divine, being your daughter is simply sublime! You gave us wings, and lots of advice-except that time you told me to pet that lion twice"

Odette: Clara, please.

Clara: "But still you're the best, from halo to toe, even when your temper begins to show! Happy Mother's Day, from your favorite child- That's me- I love you, even when I forget dates outright!”

Odette: ...Okay, I’ll admit. That’s kind of sweet.

Clara: I know, right? Now let’s go give her our gifts!

[Back down in Hell, again. Adam walks out of the Hotel sadly, only to bump into someone]

Adam: Oof.

Sera: Are you okay?

Adam: I'm fine. Why the fuck are you here?

Sera: Oh you know, Lute Invited me. Something in this invitation said that "Sera, i'd gladly invite you to my Hotel for a Mother's day party, since Adam says that you are like a mom to Adam-"

[Adam snatches the invitation wuickly, cus he thinks it's a bit embarrassing to wards him]

Sera: Wow. Got some quick grabbers. No wonder Lute likes you. You're good with your hands.

Adam: Obviously.

[For one last time. Back up in Heaven.]

[Husk Knocks on a house door. And a woman opens the door]

Husk: [Hands the woman the letter] Hi mom... I'm up here with you now...

[Husk's mom gasps in shock, but hugs Husk anyways.]