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Chapter Text

Elizabeth Schuyler (better known to her friends and sisters as Eliza or Beth), stared at herself in the mirror, not entirely sure what she was looking for.

Long, straight brown hair framed a pale, round face, with flushed cheeks, pale pink, glossy lips and sparkling eyes. A slender (ish) figure was clad in a light blue dress with a round neckline and two thick straps, one sliding off her shoulder. Little diamonds gleamed from their perches in her earlobes and around her wrist.

Suddenly two hands appeared on her shoulders, and another face appeared in the mirror. A darker one, with luscious, curly locks and a stunning deep, almost metallic pink cocktail dress. “Hey ‘Liza,” the face grinned, meeting Elizabeth’s eyes in the mirror, “What’re you thinking about?”

“Not much, Angie,” Eliza replied, turning and attempting to smile at her older sister. “Why?”

“You looked so serious,” Angelica’s face morphed into a pout as she brushed a strand of hair out of Eliza’s face, “and I was just wondering if you were still concerned about what Dad said. You know he doesn’t mean it.”

Sighing, Eliza returned her attention to her reflection in the mirror. Earlier that evening, the three Schuyler sisters had visited their father Philip’s house for the weekly family dinner, and it had been… difficult, for Eliza. “Angie, you know he does. I think I just need to move away, so he can stop breathing down my neck about it.”

“But we have moved away!” Angelica replied. “The three of us,” she gestured to the two of them and their little sister Peggy, still busy humming as she applied mascara, “live in our own apartment under our own earnings-”

“And as much as I love living with you two,” Eliza interrupted, “we still live far too close to Dad, and he still doesn’t seem to get that we have our own lives and that he can’t tell us what to do with them! You think I like, week after week, listening to the continuous refrain of ‘Elizabeth, you know you can’t stay at that little journalism establishment forever, don’t you?’” she did her best to mimic their father’s deep, stern voice, “‘You should be trying to make a name for yourself, to make our family name proud. Look at your sisters.’”

Angelica tried to interject at this point, but Eliza kept going, “And I hate that he has a point! You’re already a big name in the music industry, and your modelling ‘side job’ is only helping matters! And Peggy is starting to make a name for herself in fashion, and she’s still in university! Dad just can’t seem to accept that I’m okay not being famous, I’m okay with having no aspirations bigger than making it to Assistant Editor in my workplace, I’m okay with none of the ‘renown’ that he thinks a Schuyler should have!”

Finished with a rant she’d been keeping inside for weeks, Eliza was breathing heavily, her shoulders shifting up and down under Angelica’s hands. “I’m sorry,” she murmured, “I just- I just feel that as long as I’m still living with family, I’m still open to associating with all my family.”

After a short silence, Eliza saw Angelica nod in the mirror. “I guess that makes sense,” she admitted, “I’ve always known that you’ve preferred to be out of the spotlight, but I didn’t realise that Dad would give you pressure about it.”

“You know you’ll have our full support when you move,” Peggy piped up, causing both sisters to turn around - it appeared she had been listening after all, “and our door will always be open to you if you ever need it.”

Relieved, Eliza turned, pulling both her sisters into a hug. “You guys are too good to me. I love you both.”

Angelica grinned, wrapping her arms around them both. “We love you too, ‘Liza.”

*~*

Leaving the taxi, Eliza peered up at the nightclub. Brightly lit in the chaos of a New York night, the sign proudly declared, ‘My Shot’, their slogan scrawled on one of the windows - Raise a Glass to Freedom! - in neon blue.

“Are you sure about this place?” Peggy inquired, coming to stand next to Eliza, “It looks a bit… dingy.”

Waving off the taxi driver, Angelica began to walk towards the door, her high heels clicking on the pavement. “It hosts one of the best parties in NYC, despite it’s… drab appearance. And,” Angelica smirked as she paused and turned to face her younger sisters, “it’s a brilliant place to pick up boys.”

Eliza’s eyes widened. “Angie, no you didn’t!”

“Yes she did!” Peggy began to bounce, running forward to Angelica. “You’re the best!”

“I know,” Angelica preened. “Now let’s go find ourselves some hot dates!”

Inside, the nightclub admittedly looked a lot better. Large, noisy and crowded, without many of the bad smells associated with similar buildings, and just enough light to see everything without having to strain. Angelica guided them over to a group of women she knew, who Peggy happily began chatting with, while she disappeared into the crowd to ‘scope out the male contingent’.

While her older sister was off, Eliza did a lot of dancing, enjoying the music and atmosphere, and Peggy’s joyful laugh. Then, in the middle of one whirl, Eliza spotted Angelica standing nearby, surrounded by a few groups of boys. One group was made of four men, joking and elbowing each other with grins. As Eliza watched, fascinated, one of the men slung their arm over another’s shoulders and sang, “Raise a glass to freedom! Something they can never take away.”

“No matter what they tell you!” replied the second man, shrugging off his friend’s arm. As he did, his face got thrown into light and Eliza stopped dancing.

And stared, a flush beginning in her cheeks.

His face was sharp, with messy brown hair and beautiful dark eyes. There was the beginnings of stubble on his chin, and his smart white shirt had two buttons undone at the top, along with the sleeves rolled up to the elbows. A grin spread across his face, and Eliza could feel her blush darkening.

He was the most handsome man she’d ever seen.

“Eliza? Are you okay?” Shaking her head, Eliza turned to see Peggy watching her, concerned.

After a quick pause to recollect herself, Eliza nodded, “Yeah, but I think I need a drink.”

Expertly navigating the crowd, Eliza reached the bar and slid onto a seat. “Excuse me, can I have a lemonade please?”

“No alcohol?” asked the bartender, a little surprised.

She shook her head.

“Coming right up.” Nodding her thanks, Eliza turned and surveyed the dancers. Peggy was still happily boogieing to the music with a couple of Angelica’s friends, her golden skirt sweeping the floor. Smiling at the sight, Eliza twisted towards the commotion happening in the corner of her eye, and started at the sight of Angelica marching over to her, a bunch of men in tow.

“Eliza!” she exclaimed happily, elegantly sitting down next to her. “I need help to be saved from an overdose of guys.”

Rolling her eyes with a laugh, Eliza replied, “Well, you were the one who went over to them in the first place, so it’s technically your fault.”

Grudgingly, Angelica conceded the point, tapping her pink fingernails against the tabletop. “That’s fair.” Behind her, one of the guys coughed, and she turned around, raising one sleek black eyebrow. “Yes?”

“You going to introduce us, Angelica?” he asked, “You promised to help us meet women here, after all.”

Angelica closed her eyes. “I wasn’t exactly talking about-” Cutting herself off with a sigh, she smiled, tight-lipped. “Boys, this is my sister, Elizabeth Schuyler. Any of you try to do anything to her and no one will ever find your body. Beth, these are four morons who are somehow on track to becoming prestigious residents of New York. John Laurens,” the man who had started singing earlier inclined his head with a smile, “Marquis de Lafayette,” a tall man with his curly hair pulled back into a ponytail winked, “Hercules Mulligan,” a well built man with skin darker than Angelica’s tilted his head while raising a hand, “and Alexander Hamilton.”

Eliza had to restrain a gasp when the man she’d been captivated by before smiled and reached out a hand. Trying to keep her composure, she grasped Alexander’s hand and they shook. The touch sent tingles up her arm.

“I would say it’s a pleasure to meet you, but given my sister’s threat, I don’t know if that’s safe,” she joked, pleased when the four of them laughed, Angelica not bothering to hide the proud grin that slipped onto her face.

Pulling attention away from her sister, Angelica announced, “I can introduce you to more women without death threats beforehand if you’ll follow me.” She stood up, and three of them prepared to follow her, but Alexander instead took her vacated stool. “Alex?”

He waved his hand. “I’ll keep the lovely Elizabeth company and get the boys some more drinks. You know none of them will consider leaving until they are thoroughly smashed.”

With a graceful incline of her head (although Eliza could see how hard it was for her older sister to leave her alone with a man), Angelica swept away, followed by the other guys. At that moment, the bartender reappeared with Eliza’s lemonade, which she sipped on, thankful for something to do so she wouldn’t have to start the conversation.

“Do you live with your sisters?” asked Alexander, tapping his fingers on the neck of the beer bottle he’d just been given.

Eliza nodded. “We have a flat halfway between the university Peggy’s attending and Angie’s music studio. I’m considering moving out though,” she added, not sure why she’d admitted it.

“Why?” inquired Alexander, taking a slow sip of his drink.

Questioning why she was telling someone she’d just met this information, Eliza summed up the father situation. “I suppose he loves me,” she concluded, “but he doesn’t seem to see that I’m happy with my life as it is. Oh well,” she shrugged, “you know fathers.”

“My father left when I was a kid,” replied Alexander, nervously fiddling with the neck of his bottle. Eyes widening, Eliza paused, unsure at how to respond. Looking up, he gave her a flicker of a smile and explained, “He was British, visiting the Caribbean for work. It was just supposed to be a one night stand but something went wrong, and well… he wasn’t going to saddle himself with a poor girlfriend and a mixed race son.”

Eliza cupped her hand over her mouth. “I’m so sorry, Alexander. As much as I get annoyed at my father, I don’t think I could imagine growing up without him.”
Alexander shrugged, flashing Eliza another smile (she fought very hard to stop going pink). “I lived,” he said, “and I’m now building my career in one of the greatest cities in the world.”

“Isn’t it just,” Eliza agreed, sipping her lemonade. “We’re so lucky.”

Leaning over, Alexander tapped a single finger against her glass. “Is that alcoholic?”

Eliza shook her head, feeling herself get hot at his proximity. “Although we don’t have a designated driver, I’m the designated put-people-into-bed-and-look-after-them-tomorrow person, which is harder to do if I’m tipsy or hungover myself.”

“I’m the designated driver in my group,” Alexander responded, pulling his hand back and settling it on the bartop, “So I only have a couple of beers, while the others get as drunk and crazy as they want. It’s hard, feeling out of control like that,” he admitted, “so I rarely get more than a little tipsy.”

Absentmindedly twisting a strand of hair around one finger - and unaware as to how Alexander was mesmerised by the movement - Eliza agreed, “I know the dangers that can come to a woman alone in a city like this, and I don’t know how to defend myself as well as my sisters do. I know I have a better chance at surviving sober, so I’m going to only traverse these streets sober. Or, as sober as I can get,” she added, making Alexander chuckle, strands of his hair swaying a little. Eliza wondered what they would feel like between her fingers, before trying to push the thought out of her head. Currently, he’s a nice guy you’re having a conversation with, she chided herself, don’t go ruining it all with your unrealistic dreams and fantasies.

“Do you dance?” Alexander inquired, snapping Eliza out of her thoughts.

Shrugging, she tipped her head back and forth. “A little, but not very well. I’m not nearly as musical as Angelica, and I don’t throw myself into things like Peggy, so I end up bobbing a little and trying not to look awkward.” She chuckled, but Alexander didn’t join in, instead watching Eliza with his beautiful eyes, his dark brow furrowed.

“What is it?” Eliza asked self-consciously, reaching for her face. “Do I have something on my nose?”

Alexander quickly shook his head. “No, I was just wondering… well…” he coughed; then he straightened up and looked Eliza dead in the eye. “Why do you compare yourself to your sisters, Elizabeth? What can you get from it except for confirmation that everyone is different?”

“Call me Eliza, please,” she said first, still trying to figure out how to respond to his question about something she’d been subconsciously doing her whole life. “And I guess… I’m not sure actually. I’ve never wanted to be well-known, to be in the spotlight, so I’m not, but I suppose everyone assumes I’m not because I’m not like my sisters, so they compare me to them. And I think some people - like my dad - have been doing it for long enough that I end up making the comparisons too.”

“And most of the time it’s done negatively,” Alexander mused, taking another sip of his beer.

Feeling a little like she’d just voluntarily laid down on a hospital table and opened herself up for everyone to see, Eliza quickly changed the subject. “Do you know if there are any quieter places near here? The noise is getting a bit overwhelming,” she admitted.

Setting his beer bottle down, Alexander grinned at Eliza. “It’s like you read my mind; I was just thinking about somewhere we could go so I don’t have to strain to hear you over the music.” He stood and held out a hand to her. “You coming?”

“Definitely,” Eliza took Alexander’s hand and got to her feet, pausing in shock when he pressed a kiss to her knuckles. “What are you doing, Alexander?”

“Taking the opportunity when it comes,” he murmured on the back of her hand, before lacing their fingers together and beginning to lead her to the back of the club. “And please,” he glanced over his shoulder at Eliza, “call me Alex.”

*~*

Hours later, Angelica stared around the nightclub with a frown. She’d had a good night, dancing with her girlfriends and kissing random boys, and it had only come to her attention a few minutes ago that she had left her little sister Eliza at the bar with Alex Hamilton, of all people. Angelica didn’t want to know what kind of sister that made her, leaving Eliza with a man who was a notorious flirt but never seemed to actually date any women (or men), and then forgetting about the whole thing!

Peggy was frantic, obsessively worrying about where Eliza could have gone. They had looked everywhere, asked everyone, and the only person who had been helpful was the bartender: she’d informed them that the pair had disappeared, hand in hand, hours ago, with the spoken intention to find somewhere quiet to talk.

As often as Angelica had been to My Shot, she’d never left the main area, and had no idea where they could’ve gone. In the end, she got her answer from John Laurens, tapping on her shoulder. “What?” Angelica asked, exasperated.

“D’you know where Hammy went?” he slurred, considerably drunk. “He was with your sis’er, the one in the blue dress, but then he vanished!” Behind him, Marquis de Lafayette made a ‘poof’ motion with his fingers.

“The bartender said that they went off to find somewhere quiet to talk. You wouldn’t know where that could be, would you?” Angelica asked, critically eyeing the three men.

After a moment of contemplation, Lafayette stuck his hand in the air. “I know!” he exclaimed, and began to march towards the back corner of the room. With a shrug, Angelica followed, the other two boys behind her.

He took them through a door Angelica had never noticed before, and up a winding staircase covered in mud tracks. At the very top of the staircase was a ladder, topped by a trapdoor. The wood making up the trapdoor was rotting, meaning Angelica could see parts of the night sky through it, and could hear two familiar voices in the middle of a conversation.

“...you can’t just say that, Alex! That’s so rude!” Eliza’s voice exclaimed through giggles.

“Yeah, but I’m not the type to stay silent when I have an opinion, ‘Liz; I thought you might’ve figured that one out by now,” replied Alex Hamilton’s voice, sounding happy, amused and… content? No, that can’t be right. After all, he was right about you, a voice sneered in Angelica’s mind, you will never be satisfied with just one man. Not like Eliza will. Why can’t you admit it?

Pushing up the trapdoor, Lafayette hollered, “Heeeeey, love birds! We’re looking for a sweet Schuyler sister, and a royal pain in the ass. You wouldn’t know where they are, would you?”

From her perch on the ladder, Angelica heard a masculine yell of offended outrage, and more of Eliza’s laughter. Glancing down at Angelica, Lafayette announced, “They’re coming over, so we need to start heading down.”

Nodding, Angelica began to move, hand over hand to the bottom of the ladder, and walking down the stairs. She felt like Orpheus in the underworld, that she couldn’t turn around to see the person she loved following her, or they would disappear. When she reached the bottom of the stairs, Angelica turned to watch the last few: Lafayette, singing something bawdy at the top of his lungs; Alex Hamilton, a relaxed smile on his face as he helped the person behind him traipse the steps; and Eliza, her grin lighting up the drab stairwell as she murmured something to Alex that made him laugh, her hand firmly in his.

Watching them together made something twist in Angelica’s chest.

Want, and...envy.

Mentally, she shook herself viciously. You had your shot at Alex Hamilton; it’s not Eliza’s fault you threw it away! In fact, Eliza doesn’t know anything about your history at all. If she did, she’d let you have another chance with him because she’s the kindest person in the universe. But you can tell she already likes him, at least a little - she’d be so broken if you asked that of her. So no. No being jealous of Eliza. If anyone deserves a man with a no doubt amazing future like Alexander Hamilton’s, it’s her.

Spotting Angelica, Eliza’s smile widened even more. “Hey Angie!” she grinned, “How’s your evening been?”

Angelica shrugged. “You know, the usual. Well, until a few minutes ago, when I realised you’d vanished. Peggy and I have been frantic.” The small, envious part of Angelica got a kind of vicious satisfaction from the way Eliza’s face fell and how she let go of Alex’s hand.

“Sorry, sis,” she said, downcast, “I didn’t really think about that. I sent you both a text, but I didn’t wonder about what would happen if you didn’t have your phones on you so… sorry.”

“It’s fine, Eliza,” Angelica replied with a soft smile, “I’m just glad you’re not physically hurt in any way. I can’t say anything for your mind, though, given who you were with.” Back with his mates, Alex melodramatically clapped a hand over his chest, making both sisters giggle.

“Eliza!” Their talk was interrupted by Peggy yelling and flying across the room, throwing herself into her older sister’s arms. “You’re not dead!” she crowed, arms around Eliza’s neck.

Smiling at her, Eliza hugged Peggy back. “I’m fine. I’m sorry for worrying you.”

“It’s okay,” Peggy shrugged the apology off. “I’m just happy you’re okay.”

Once the sisters had pulled away, Angelica clapped her hands together. “Well, I think that’s enough drama for one night, so we should go, girls.” The other two agreed, and they were heading out the door when someone called Eliza’s name behind them.

Turning, Angelica had to put a firm stranglehold on her emotions when she spotted Alex Hamilton hurrying towards them, his eyes fixed on Eliza. “Alex?” she asked.

“I was just thinking,” he started, a little out of breath, “we might’ve met partially through your sister, but it was mostly by chance that we were both here tonight. And I know that when I end up seeing you again, I don’t want it to be by chance. So…” he pulled his phone out of his pocket, “can we exchange numbers?”

Reaching into her purse, Eliza grabbed her own phone. “Sure,” she smiled, and watching them, Angelica felt that twist of jealousy again. They created contacts for each other, inputted the numbers, and had a quick hug, before Alex Hamilton nodded to Angelica and Peggy and wandered off.

“Oooooh, ‘Liza,” cooed Peggy, “Do you have a boyfriend?”

“No,” replied Eliza, the darkness not entirely hiding her flush, “We’re just friends.”

Stepping out into the night air of the city, Peggy continued to tease her sister. “But you liiiike him, don’t you?”

This time, only a blind man could’ve missed Eliza’s blush.

*~*

Over the next fortnight or so, Alex and Eliza texted each other regularly, meeting up every few days for coffee, or a walk. Through her sisters’ friends and some of the young women at her workplace, Eliza put together Alex’s not entirely reputable reputation, and teased him about it whenever she could. Some people called Eliza naive or innocent, but in reality, what they were seeing of her was her optimism. Actually, Eliza was an excellent judge of character, and she’d known right from the beginning the ambitious, fast-talking, strongly-opinionated man she’d befriended, who valued his work over everything else.

Or, according to a notorious gossip (who, ironically, worked as a gossip columnist), almost everything else.

“I swear to you, Alexander Hamilton’s dating someone,” she chattered at their break table one lunchtime. “He’s not writing as much in the evenings; he’s electing to go out rather than work during lunch. It’s not stopping his climb through the ranks of the law firm, his mind will attest to that, but he’s giving up chances to work to do… something else. And there’s no way he’d give those things up for anyone but a girlfriend. Or boyfriend.”

Swallowing a mouthful of salad, Eliza asked, “Why couldn’t he be giving things up for a friend?”

The gossip columnist snorted. “Well, if they are just friends, you can bet Hamilton doesn’t want them to stay friends for very long. He doesn’t give up those work opportunities for John Laurens or Marquis de Lafayette, and they’re best friends. I tell you, whoever that person is, Alex Hamilton likes them. A lot.”

Thinking of all their lunchtime meet-ups and evening texting sessions, Eliza hurriedly ate more of her salad and felt hugely relieved when one of the graphic designers changed the topic.

For the entire afternoon, she was considerably distracted, thinking about Alex and why people had come to the assumption that he was dating someone, when he was just hanging out with her, and they were only friends, right?

Right?

Like, Eliza had had a crush on Alex since they’d first met and it had only gotten bigger with time, but there was no way he liked her back. People like Alex Hamilton dated people like Angelica (and no, she wasn’t oblivious, Eliza knew there was history there), so why he’d even noticed Eliza in the first place was a mind-boggling question she didn’t know the answer to. There was no way he liked her even half as much as she liked him.

No way.

“Of course he likes you back, Beth!” reassured Peggy, plaiting Eliza’s hair that evening. The three sisters had agreed on a pamper night, and Angelica, green mask smeared across her face, was busily lighting candles while Eliza investigated their shared nail polish stash. “You’re the kindest, prettiest girl out there.”

Though there were warring emotions scrawled across her face, Angelica agreed, “He’d be a fool to not want to date you, ‘Liza. You’re beautiful, inside and out.”

“Says the model,” Eliza sniped back, though it had no malice in it.

Coming to sit down next to them, Angelica began rummaging through the nail polish collection, eventually landing on a mid purple-pink. “Eliza, has Alex said anything to you about a possible relationship?”

Carefully unscrewing the bottle, Eliza began to apply the colour to her sister’s fingernails. “Not since the night we met.”

There was a long pause. “You’re kidding,” Angelica said finally.

“No,” replied Eliza nervously, her head bent over her work. “He joked about taking me on a date, and I told him that we were going to be friends first, and then I’d see. He hasn’t brought it up since.”

Another pause. Peggy reached around Eliza to grab a hairband, tying the bottom of her plait.

“You know,” she started carefully, moving to grab herself a bottle of nail polish now she’d finished with Eliza’s hair, “It’s possible that-”

“Peggy,” Angelica’s voice was harsh. “It’s one thing to be generally encouraging, it’s another to be serious. Don’t get her hopes up.”

Fingers latching onto a bottle of dark orange-red polish, Peggy protested, “But this never happens, you know that.”

Feeling completely out of the loop, Eliza asked, “What never happens?”

“Alex Hamilton is a notorious flirt; everyone knows it. The only people he doesn’t mess with like that are his closest friends, his frenemy Aaron Burr, and his superiors - who are usually something to do with his work. He flirts with everyone else, especially girls,” Peggy explained, “so that he hasn’t been messing with you since you guys met means he really, really cares about you.”

“Or he’s just setting you up for a fall,” finished Angelica pessimistically.

Peggy gasped; Eliza looked up into her sister’s face. “Angie,” she said gently, “Do you want me to stop being friends with Alex? I can tell you guys have some sort of history.”

After a moment of hesitation, Angelica shook her head. “No, ‘Liza, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be so mean about this. If you want to be friends with Alex, hell, if you want to date him and he wants to date you too, don’t let me stop you. He’s a great guy, even if he is-”

“A hot mess?” interjected Peggy snidely, making the three of them laugh.

And that was the end of the matter until later that night.

To Eliza’s left, Peggy was sleeping happily, hugging her pillow and occasionally kicking the covers up. To her right, Angelica was still as stone, staring at the ceiling. Both of them could tell the other hadn’t yet fallen asleep. Near her right hand, Eliza felt a buzz, and her hand automatically closed around-

Her phone.

What was her phone doing going off at this time of night?

Lazily, Eliza picked up the phone and brought it towards her face. She squinted at the lit up screen.

Alex: hey, u up? i cant sleep

Eliza could feel Angelica’s eyes on her. She could tell her sister knew who was texting her.

Turning her head, Eliza met her sister’s eyes. “As much as it might hurt to cut contact with him,” she whispered, “you know I care about you more. One word from you can end whatever we have, and you can try and reconcile with him whatever the history is that gives you that look in your eyes.”

A long moment stretched between them, their eyes locked.

Angelica sighed silently. A long, slow release of breath.

“Even if I wanted to,” she murmured back, “I wouldn’t do that to you.” She nodded at the phone. “Go ahead.”

Smiling gratefully, Eliza rolled over onto her front and began to text back. i cant sleep either

She didn’t realise how long Angelica laid awake that night, long after she said goodnight to Alex and fell asleep, tears streaming down her face the whole time.

*~*

A couple of weeks later, Eliza finally built up the courage to breach the subject. She and Alex were eating lunch together, and were planning to have takeaway at his flat that evening. Both of them were working on their laptops, but it was an easy silence, sitting in their favourite cafe halfway between their respective workplaces. Looking up from responding to an email, Eliza took a minute to admire Alex’s face, the line of his jaw, the shape of his eyes.

As if he could sense her attention on him, Alex glanced up, and their eyes met. Trying to dampen her blush, Eliza smiled, and Alex grinned back. “What’re you thinking about?” he asked.

“Something one of my colleagues said. The gossip columnist,” Eliza added, and Alex’s eyes lightened in understanding. “She’s noticed that you’re taking more breaks from work - at lunch, in the evenings, etc - to do stuff, and she thinks you have a girlfriend or boyfriend.”

Eyebrows raised, Alex laughed. “I’m surprised people watch me that much.”

Eliza couldn’t help her reply. “Well, you do have a reputation.”

This time, Alex laughed harder; Eliza took another bite of her panini, supremely satisfied.

Suddenly becoming serious, Alex stated, “I suppose, if you’ve been thinking about it, you’ve noticed that the times I’m not doing work is when I’m hanging out with you.”

“I’ve noticed,” Eliza replied simply, letting him talk.

Alex nodded absentmindedly, focused on whatever he was going to say. “Usually I put my work above everything, but I don’t actually need to work as much as I do to keep my job and progress in my workplace. Recently, I’d rather be spending time with you than anything else, even work. And,” he raised his hands, “I know you said that you wanted us to be friends and you’d think about a relationship, but I don’t know how much longer I’ll be able to wait without doing something stupid to try and speed up your thought process.”

Reaching over, Eliza covered his hand with her own. “You don’t have to wait,” she replied, entwining their fingers together and pressing a kiss to the back of his hand.

The way Alex’s face lit up was something she wanted to remember for the rest of her life. “You mean…” he could hardly contain himself when Eliza nodded.

Letting go of Eliza’s hand, Alex reached across the table to cup her face and press a kiss to her cheek. “I’ll try to be worthy of being your boyfriend,” he said, making Eliza chuckle.

“You already are,” she whispered, turning back to her laptop. She didn’t realise Alex had overheard her and was grinning like a loon as he went back to work.

That evening, the two of them cuddled up on the sofa, eating Thai and watching a new Netflix series, when Alex’s phone went off. Eliza paused the episode and shifted to the side, letting Alex dig his phone out of his pocket. “What the heck,” he muttered at whatever name was on the screen. Accepting the call, he held his phone to his ear. “What do you want, John?”

Eliza ate another spoonful of green thai curry, watching Alex’s face as he sat up. “What?” he demanded, “How do you know that?” After a long pause, he sighed, “How on earth does gossip get around this city so fast? Yes, and yes… Look, I don’t know. But you can bet that it’s none of anybody’s business, especially Jefferson, I don’t care what he says.”

Given that she could now guess the subject of the conversation, Eliza went back to her food, letting Alex finish the call with his friend. When he’d hung up, she asked “How many people know?”

“The whole damn city, it seems,” Alex grumbled. Seeing Eliza’s face, he quickly changed his response, “Herc’s cousin’s been watching us have lunch in that cafe for weeks, apparently, and noticed the shift today. When Hercules told John and Laf, Thomas Jefferson overheard, which means James Madison probably knows too. I think that’s it so far, but this will probably spread fast, so I’d suggest telling your sisters before they hear from another source.”

“Knowing Angelica, I’m probably too late for that,” Eliza replied, setting down her plate and playing the episode. “She seems to know everything that’s happened as soon as it’s happened.”

Alex smiled. “Peggy’s learning to do that too, isn’t she?”

Nodding, Eliza commented, “Sometimes they’ll be having a conversation, and I’ll feel so far out of the loop it’s ridiculous.”

“You’d never guess this, but Herc is the biggest gossip out of my mates, the one who keeps us all in the loop” Alex grinned at Eliza’s start. “I know. Shocking, isn’t it?”

“To say the least.” Hercules Mulligan was large, imposing, and probably the last person Eliza would pick as being a gossip. “But every day is filled with surprises, today more than most.”

Confused, Alex asked, “Today?”

Twisting her hands together in her lap, Eliza admitted quietly, “I never thought you actually liked me back. Didn’t think it was even a possibility.”

“‘Liz…” Alex folded his hands over hers. “Why on earth would you think that?”

“Why wouldn’t I?” Eliza asked, “Most of the time, young men like you - moving up in the world - all have the same type. Girls like Angie or Peggy, who are attractive and known and have fame-associated jobs like fashion or music or films. I’m in the background (not that I want the spotlight), and I’m working as a journalist. And I’m happy working as a journalist. I don’t want any more than that. For most men like you, that’s not enough. It doesn’t satisfy them. I’m not their type.”

A long moment later, Alex said, “Can I be honest with you?” Once Eliza had nodded, he admitted, “I didn’t think you were my type either. Although I’ve never felt serious about a girl before this, I thought my type was the same as Lafayette’s - the type you just described.

“But at that party, you caught my eye, and I was suddenly fascinated by you. I’ve spent my life being fast-paced, never content, never satisfied - it’s been the only way for me to survive and thrive. I never thought someone could have a slower life, and for it to be actually interesting, but you’re so happy with what you have, and you find the magic in your everyday life without having to be somebody, and that’s so amazing. To start with, I thought I was just interested in how you lived your life, slower but happier, and then I realised that I was interested in you, your optimism, your quiet joy, your kindness and your trust. I realised that I didn’t just want to find those quiet, content moments in my life, but I wanted to find them with you. I wanted to spend time with you. I wanted you.”

Eliza’s lips parted in shock. She’d never thought anyone would say anything like that to her, let alone it being someone like Alex. Seeing her surprise, Alex’s eyes softened and he leaned forward, cupping her cheeks.

“Eliza,” he murmured, “Can I kiss you?”

Instead of waiting to respond, Eliza leaned forward and pressed her lips to his.

It was a question and an answer. His lips were soft and perfectly shaped, with a little dent that Eliza nipped. Alex groaned, and suddenly his tongue was in her mouth and his arms were around her waist and she was pushing him down into the cushions of the sofa, her fingers twisting into his hair. The strands were just as silky as she’d imagined them.

They kissed for a while, lips moving together, the Netflix episode playing quietly in the background. When they finally pulled away, Eliza was sitting on Alex’s thighs, her upper body pressed against his, her hands pushing his shoulders back into the sofa.

Alex smirked up at her. “I was not expecting that to escalate so fast.”

Suddenly nervous, Eliza sat back and tried to slide off Alex’s legs, but his arms came up, locking around her waist and keeping her in place. “Hey, no, I wasn’t saying that was a bad thing, just that it was unexpected.”

“I’m not usually this forward.. I surprised myself,” Eliza admitted, leaning forward a little and curling her fingers in Alex’s hair. He stretched forward, brushing his lips against hers.

Shifting her body, Eliza slid down next to Alex, her legs across his lap. One hand went to his shoulder while the other grabbed for the remote, while his arms looped around her waist.

“Now,” Eliza turned her attention back to the TV. “Let’s find something we’ll actually watch, alright?”

*~*

Next morning, Eliza woke up to Peggy bouncing on her bed like a six year old. “‘Liza! Eliza!” she was yelling, “Why didn’t you tell us?”

“Whaa?” Groggily, she opened her eyes to see both of her sisters leaning over her with identical frustrated stares. “If this is about last night, I would’ve told you, but you were both asleep when I got back.”

“Last night?” Peggy exclaimed, “We’re talking about yesterday lunch! You and Alexander Hamilton!”

Pushing herself to sit up, Eliza waved Peggy out of her face. Receiving the message, the girl moved back, joining their older sister sitting at the edge of the bed. “They’re related,” she grudgingly admitted, “and I had no idea just how fast news travels among the young adults of New York.”

“Whatever,” Angelica shook it off. “Come on, Beth! Spill!”

For the first half an hour or so of her morning, Eliza regaled her sisters with the stories of yesterday - lunch and evening, answering as many questions as she could. Both Peggy and Angelica were intrigued by the story, especially by how caring Alex was, making sure she knew his feelings, and the little things in the story: getting her favourite takeaway, double-checking that she’s comfortable, telling her short silly tales that made her laugh.

Knowledgeable as they were, Peggy and Angelica quickly informed Eliza of the rumours going around so she could prepare for the inevitable questions, both the good and the bad. All of them scoffed at some of the more ridiculous gossip, but they still made Eliza pretty nervous. Did people really think she was like that?

After that conversation, Eliza rushed to get ready so she could get to work on time. Just as she was leaving the flat, Angelica called, “‘Liza? You know, if this relationship of yours gets any more serious than you’ve told us it already is, you’re going to have to bring him to meet Dad. You’ve worked that out right?”

The four letter word that was Eliza’s only response was enough to show she hadn’t.

*~*

A month later, Philip Schuyler was settling down to dinner with his three daughters when the doorbell rang. Grumbling under his breath, he got up, strolled down to the front door, and pulled it open. To the young man in front of him, he asked, “Who are you and what do you want?” Admittedly, he wasn’t particularly polite, but he’d missed last week’s dinner with his family and was impatient to spend time with them today.

“I’m Alexander Hamilton. It’s good to meet you,” replied the man, unmoved, stretching out a hand for Philip to shake. Which he did, looking at the young man in a new light. He’d heard of Hamilton - young, but already of great renown, building a name for himself just like Angelica.

Philip was just opening his mouth to ask Hamilton why he was there, when a voice from behind him called, “Alex! You made it!”

Dancing past him, Eliza pulled Alex over the threshold and into a hug, which he quickly reciprocated. Watching them curiously, Philip shut the door behind the young man. They pulled away, pressing their foreheads together, and Alex whispered something that made Eliza giggle, before pressing a kiss to her nose. Just from that action, Philip could work out exactly what was going on.

Properly pulling away, Eliza dropped her hands, though Alex kept one wrapped around her waist. “Dad, I’d like you to meet Alex Hamilton, my boyfriend.”

After quickly saying hello to the young man, Philip observed them both, and the ease of which they stood together. “And how long has this been going on, exactly?” he asked.

“A month,” Eliza replied promptly, “and we were friends a month beforehand.”

Now that was a bit of a surprise, though Philip supposed it shouldn’t have been, given the one of his daughters he was talking to. Angelica and Peggy were far more likely to kiss boys not long after meeting them, and he never took any of their boyfriends seriously. But it was Eliza standing in front of him, with a young man she’d known for months, and had been friends with for a while before they’d gotten together. A sensible situation, exactly what Philip should’ve expected from his most level-headed daughter. However, any of them having boyfriends was a shock enough for Philip (in his mind, they were still his little girls), let alone one that was clearly serious.

Coming to a decision, Philip said, “Alex, why don’t you go to the dining room and get reacquainted with Angelica and Peggy. It’s the second door on your right. I just need to talk to Eliza for a second.”

Thankfully the boy didn’t argue, just left with a nod towards Philip and a kiss on Eliza’s cheek.

She followed his progress down the corridor, smiling when she heard the start of Peggy’s dramatic greeting. Once he’d disappeared, the door closing behind him, Eliza turned back to Philip, a steely determination hidden at the back of her eyes.

“If you’re going to insult my choice, save it,” she snapped, “I won’t have you diss Alex like you’ve been dissing my career.”

This ultimatum also shocked Philip, but he tried to hide it. “I just want to make sure that you know what you’re getting yourself into,” he replied calmly, “A long-term relationship is quite something to contend with, and men like Alex Hamilton do not usually end up-”

“Dating women like me?” Eliza interrupted, looking furious. “I’ll have you know, that’s the reason why I’m as confident in this relationship as I am. Why do you think Angelica will never let herself get invested in a boy? Because she doesn’t know who really cares about her, and who’s using her for her money or reputation,” Eliza jabbed a finger at Philip, who took a hasty step backwards. “I am normal. A normal job, a normal income. People only know my surname, and if they recognise my first, it’ll be from association with my sisters. The only thing someone could get from me is part of my inheritance, and that’s not something I advertise.

“Alex is dating me because he cares about me,” she continued, “and the only reason I really know that for sure is because I am not making a name for myself, I do not have any fame, the two things you criticise the most about me! So I think I know exactly what I’m getting into, thank you very much, and if you have anything else insulting to say, I would hold your tongue.”

Philip felt like he’d been slapped across the face. Where had this Eliza come from? Who protected her sisters and her boyfriend, and stood up for herself with ease? Obviously there was some backtracking he needed to do.

Carefully choosing his words, Philip spoke into the silence. “I am sorry that you feel like I’ve been insulting your choice of work and career. I only ever want what’s best for you, and if I haven’t been listening to you and showing that properly, then I apologise. You clearly care a lot about this boy, and as long as he can show he cares for you too, then I will have no problem giving your relationship my blessing. Not that you’d listen to me if I didn’t,” he grumbled at the end, making Eliza crack a tiny smile. “Come here, Bethy,” Philip coaxed, holding his arms out. His middle daughter fell into them with a sigh.

They hugged for a while, just relishing each other in a way Philip realised he hadn’t been doing with Eliza for years. He definitely had some catching up to do.
When they pulled away, Philip smiled at his daughter. “Shall we go inside?”

Rolling her eyes, Eliza walked off towards the dining room, but Philip caught her grin before she turned her head.

Things were looking up.

*~*

Luckily enough, Eliza’s father liked Alex, and they continued dating for ages, to the surprise of many who’d thought that they were just going to be a fling.

Eight months after Alex had officially met Philip Schuyler for the first time, Eliza lugged two large suitcases into a flat, setting them down with a relieved sigh. Behind her came Alex and his mates, joking around and drinking beer as they carried cardboard boxes half-filled with books and random memorabilia Peggy had stuffed in them the night before. You never know what you’ll need, in a new flat, she’d claimed, but Eliza was pretty certain she wouldn’t need five snow globes and three mini Eiffel Towers. Sometimes her little sister went a little overboard.

Moving through the flat, Eliza reached the main bedroom and collapsed backwards onto the bed with a sigh. Stretching her hands in the air, Eliza’s eyes caught on the newest addition to her daily wear - a burnished gold band on her ring finger, two tiny crystals on either side of a small chunk of diamond. Both flashy and subtle. Just like her and Alex.

A smile on her face, Eliza dropped her hands, staring up at the ceiling and relishing the quiet for a mome-

“Eliza!” bellowed John, barging into the room, one of her suitcases in his arms. “Where d’you want this?”

Oh, never mind.

Sliding off the bed onto her feet, Eliza strolled over to the wardrobe and tugged it open. “Just put it at the bottom there,” she pointed, “That’s something I need to sort out later.”

“What,” asked John, obediently setting the suitcase in place, “It have your underwear innit or something?”

Eliza rolled her eyes. “No,” she replied, voice dripping with sarcasm, “It’s packed to the brim with pornography.”

“Jeez,” John put his hands up in surrender, quickly leaving the room. Shaking her head, Eliza followed him.

In the main area of the flat, Lafayette, Hercules, Alex, Peggy and Angelica were busily rummaging through the cardboard boxes and (single) suitcase scattered on the floor. Seeing Eliza enter, her sisters waved at her, elbow-deep in one large box, and Alex stood up and wandered over to her. “Hey, love,” he greeted, pecking her on the lips.

“Hey,” she responded with a smile, valiantly ignoring Lafayette and Herc pretending to retch in the background. Taking Alex’s hand, they both returned to the box he’d been looking through earlier. “I don’t need much of this when it comes down to it,” Eliza commented as they bent over the opening, “Peggy went on a bit of a packing spree last night.”

Over her little sister’s ‘hey!’, Alex asked, laughing, “Is that like a shopping spree?”

“Probably,” Eliza responded with a shrug.

Laughing harder, Alex grinned at Eliza. Strands of his messy brown hair were falling in his face, brushing his ears and eyelashes. His grin was wide and open, his eyes sparkling. A thread was caught in his hair, the bright pink standing out where it was brushing against his ear. He looked joyful and more at peace than Eliza had almost ever seen him.

Smiling softly, Eliza reached out and pulled the pink thread from behind his ear, brushing his slightly rough cheek as she did. Alex caught her hand, inspecting and kissing the ring on her finger. “I like seeing this on you,” he murmured, subconsciously leaning towards her.

“I like wearing it,” Eliza whispered back, leaning closer.

They were just about to kiss when Hercules started wolf-whistling. “Hey looovebirds!” Lafayette called, “Just because you’re engaged doesn’t mean you have an excuse to be completely disgusting around us!”

“Shut up, Laf!” exclaimed Peggy, shoving him. “I think it’s cute.”

“Of course you do,” Lafayette said, winking at Peggy, who flushed prettily and giggled before Angelica shoved them apart.

Sharing her older sister’s exasperated expression, Eliza sighed. “You do know you’re helping us move in with each other, which is just kinda encouraging the PDA?”

“Or maybe this way you can get it all out of your systems before we have to see you,” John suggested, jolting back when Angelica turned one of her glares on him. “Hey, it’s a reasonable idea!”

“It’s also my sister,” she teased (though there was still a sharp undertone to her words), “and as much as I trust her judgement, I don’t want to think about what Alex might be doing to her. Unless, of course, you want to be down a friend,” Angelica finished sweetly.

Eyes wide, Alex said hurriedly, “Please shut up John; I value my life.”

“As you should,” replied Peggy smartly, surprising a snort out of Eliza as she sat back, happily watching her sisters, her fiance and his best mates teasing each other and hanging out together like it was normal. Which it hadn’t been, less than a year ago.

If the rest of my life was like this, she thought, I’d die happy.

Chapter Text

Eliza heard the key turn in the lock, and the door open. “Honey?” Alex asked, setting down his laptop case and sliding his shoes off.

Slowly, Eliza moved into view, not bothering to hide the worn pyjamas, messy hair, or the clear tear tracks criss-crossing her flushed cheeks. Her big, blue eyes were wide and wet, watching Alex like he was a stranger.

“Eliza?” Alex’s voice broke slightly - he’d figured out that she knew.

Not bothering to keep her voice steady (Alex would see through it anyway), Eliza said absently, “You know I kept every gift you gave me? All the jewellery, photos of the chocolates and biscuits, and pressed flowers from every bouquet you’ve ever gotten me. When Peggy told me about the rumours, and how much of it she knew was embedded in truth, I took out the photos, jewellery and flowers, and I looked at them for a long, long time.”

Looking up, Eliza’s eyes met Alex’s, and he stepped forward, saying “Eliza, I-”

“Don’t.” Eliza held a hand up. “Don’t come closer. Don’t say anything. I need to say what I have to say.

“I know something’s been up with you. I’ve known it for months, Alex. Months. I’ve tried to get you to tell me what was wrong; what was going on in your mind. You blew me off, and you kept blowing me off. I’m your fiancee, Alex, I’m going to be your wife. But instead of coming to me with your troubles and letting me help you deal with them in a healthy way, you cheated on me. That’s called breaking trust. Did you know that?”

Eliza swallowed. “You’re good with words, you could probably come up with a million excuses for why you did what you did and why it ‘isn’t as bad as all that, ‘Liza, really’, but I don’t want to hear it. What you did to yourself, to me - the wrecking ball you took to our relationship - that’s only a symptom of whatever the real problem is. And until you manage to find and start solving that problem, you are not allowed back in this flat. Definitely not back in our bedroom. You’ve forfeited all rights to live here until you’ve sorted yourself out. I’ve already packed for you,” she gestured to the bulging suitcase sitting just inside the living room, “So you can just turn around and leave, rather than coming in any further.”

Despondent, Alex stared at Eliza, mouth agape. How did she know him so well? How could she stare right through him, cut straight through his heart, lancing directly to the actual issue without even trying?

How had he believed that he could keep this amazing creature without deserving her?

“I don’t know if you’ve heard the reactions to the rumours, but no one’s acting particularly surprised,” Eliza added, bringing Alex’s suitcase forward as he slipped his shoes back on. “Much of what people have been saying has been along the lines of ‘of course their relationship never lasted. Of course Hamilton got bored enough he ended up cheating on her. After all, it’s not like Eliza is popular or interesting or cool in any way. I don’t know why he bothered going out with her in the first place.’ Because when someone like you, who can charm anyone into liking them, dates someone like me, a nobody who’s friends with people who actually matter, it’s always going to end in disaster isn’t it?

“I thought we would prove them wrong,” Eliza’s voice broke, tears welling up in her eyes. “But no. You’ve built this fire, Alex, and dropped a spark onto it. All you can do now is watch it burn, and see if you can dig anything worthwhile out of the ashes.”

With that, she turned and walked off, leaving Alex shattered in her wake.

*~*

Angelica was first off the plane the moment it touched down at JFK.

Rushing through the city, she didn’t realise who she’d run into before she was recognised. “Angelica?” Alex Hamilton questioned, puzzled. “Aren’t you supposed to be at that modelling gig in London?”

Glaring at him, she replied, her voice clipped. “I came as soon as I heard.

“I don’t know what you thought you were doing with Maria Reynolds of all people,” Angelica continued, her eyes piercing her sister’s fiance, “but congratulations all the same. Eliza is the most trusting and kindest person you will ever meet; she and Peggy are the best things in my life, and she is the best thing in yours too. Everything you do and sacrifice should be for my sister, not whatever you thought you were doing, you idiot. You’ve ruined one of the best things that ever happened to you. I hope you’re satisfied.”

Alex stepped back. “Angelica, I- I hope you know that I know all of that. I’m an idiot for what I did - what on earth was I thinking? - and I know there’s no way I will ever make up for it. Your sister has graciously kicked me out of our flat and given me time to sort myself out so I never do anything like that again. Eliza’s the single greatest thing that has ever happened to me, and I don’t know if I will ever forgive myself for throwing it all away.” He looked down, taking a deep breath. “I know I will never be able to make up for what I did, but I hope your sister will give me the chance to. It’s not something I deserve, but I can’t help what I long for.”

Only letting the tiniest piece of compassion filter through, Angelica nodded. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go see her.”

*~*

The last person Angelica expected to see in Eliza’s flat when she entered it was Maria Reynolds.

Curled up on the sofa, under blankets and mindlessly watching what appeared to be the Notebook, were Eliza, Peggy and Maria, all of whom turned their heads when Angelica unlocked the front door. “Angie!” Peggy exclaimed happily, leaping to her feet and rushing by towards her older sister, closely followed by a delighted Eliza.

Both of them barrelled into Angelica, wrapping her up in a hug and reminding her vividly just how much she’d missed New York.

“I thought you were in London,” came Eliza’s frantically relieved voice from where she’d pushed her face into her older sister’s shoulder.

Pulling away, Angelica cupped Eliza’s pale face between her much darker hands. “I got the first flight out the moment I heard. How are you holding up?”

Trying to distract Angelica from the deep, deep sorrow in her eyes, Eliza quirked a smile and shrugged. “Better than I was yesterday.”

“Translation,” interjected Maria from where she was still sprawled on the sofa, “She’s still watching TV, eating too much food and crying, but today she’s also done some work, eaten healthier snacks, and went on a run this morning!” Eliza just rolled her eyes at the young woman, but Angelica actually turned to face her.

“And why are you here?” she inquired, an overprotective snap in her voice. After all, this was the woman Alex Hamilton had cheated on her Eliza with, and she was just sitting in her flat, happy as you please? Someone had to at least try to protect Eliza from forgiving too many for too much.

Stepping back, Eliza protested, “Angie!”

“No, it’s okay,” sighed Maria. “I know I shouldn’t be here, but your sisters wanted to help me, because I was in a bad place, when I made Alex cheat on Eliza.”

Grim, Angelica nodded. “Go on.”

“I was forced into a marriage when I was just eighteen,” Maria explained. “My husband didn’t care about me, only cared about the money and reputation my family gave him. He used me, and I became desperate enough that I began casting around for any way to get out of the marriage.

“In the end, I decided that the thing my husband cared about the most was his image, and if I could taint it, he would divorce me without a second thought. A good way to do that would be to cheat on him and make sure rumours got out. Because my husband didn’t let me spend time with my friends and catch up on all the gossip, I thought Alexander Hamilton was still single, like all his mates. So when I stumbled upon him at a bar, I was sure he would be the best chance to get away from my husband. If I’d known he was engaged - especially to someone like Eliza - I wouldn’t have gone anywhere near him.”

Maria took a deep breath and turned to Eliza. “And, something I haven’t told you guys yet: even though we kissed multiple times, Hamilton still did his best to stay as loyal to you as possible.” Everyone stilled. “It took a lot of persuading to get him to kiss me the first time, and only a little less the other times. The kissing was heated, but never intimate in any way. And,” Maria breathed, “and whenever things felt like they were going to go further, he would gently, but firmly, pull away and tell me no. As much as there was something wrong in his mind making him do what he did, he did his best not to stray too far. I know that’s not much comfort, but-” she shrugged, “it’s a lot better than any other man would’ve done.

“That man - for all his failings - he loves you, Beth. A lot.” Taking one of Eliza’s hands, Maria murmured, “And if I know anything, he is working as hard as possible to fix whatever’s going on with him, so he can get back to you.”

Breaking out into a proper smile (most likely the first one since she heard the news), Eliza pulled Maria into a hug. Their brown hair tangled together as Eliza cried into her new friend’s shoulder, whispering, “Thank you, Maria. Thank you.”

Watching the hug end and Eliza settle back down on the sofa, creating a space between her and Peggy for their oldest sister, Angelica let herself smile. Her little sister was in good hands.

And that Maria girl wasn’t that bad at all.

*~*

Even with the hope that Alex would be working his hardest to come back to her, Eliza still found the intervening couple of months extraordinarily difficult. Waking up in the morning, usually next to Angelica or Peggy was nice, but it wasn’t the same. Lots of things weren’t the same.

And the pitying looks she got at work were the worst things ever.

Every day, Eliza could feel the place where Alex used to fit in her life. It was like an invisible wound - slightly painful and unidentifiable until you touched it, which was when it gaped open and sent shards of raw hurt straight down into your heart. No more morning breakfasts together, with quick kisses before both of them left for work; no more meeting up for lunch, either working in their favourite cafe or going out for a walk in the park and a picnic; no more laughter over dinner as each of them told the other about their day, often over-embellishing just for the entertainment; no more cuddling up on the sofa to watch films and curling up together under the covers of their bed, falling asleep in each other’s arms.

Although that was painful enough, the constant whispers that seemed to follow Eliza every time she walked down the street did well enough to remind her that it wasn’t as if Alex had tried to stay but couldn’t. No, he had created this mess! He had thrown away the happiness, the life they’d had! It had been enough; it had been more than enough.

But he’d torn it all apart.

Why?

That was the question Eliza had had to stop herself from screaming the last time she’d seen Alex. Why did you do it? Why? WHY? Isn’t what we had enough? Wasn’t ANY of it enough? If so, then why did you bother dating me in the first place?

Only one person had answers to those questions, and Eliza knew her fiance well enough to be sure he wasn’t in a good enough place to answer them.

That didn’t make it hurt any less.

Eventually, Peggy had to go back to the flat she still shared with Angelica. After she’d finally got a divorce with James Reynolds, Maria decided to move in with Peggy, leaving Angelica to stay with Eliza and keep an eye on her. As much as Eliza was so grateful for her sisters and the unlikely friend she’d made, there were times where she wanted to just be by herself.

Often, she’d finish work and - if she needed some alone time - stop off at the park on the way home. Her and Alex’s favourite park. When she was wandering alone, down the path, through the trees and the meadow, Eliza would let herself cry, remembering everything she’d had and exactly how she’d lost it.

How did you forgive someone you’d already given everything you had to? Who’d taken that everything, torn it to shreds and thrown it back in your face?

As Eliza - at first reluctantly, and then with enthusiasm she didn’t feel - threw herself back into her work, the reply she needed came, slowly, patiently.

When they were ready to make amends, and give you everything they had, expecting nothing in return.

As first one month passed, then two, people began to stop paying attention to Eliza again, moving on to the next big drama and gossip. Maria got a job, and moved into her own flat, though still visited the others whenever she had the chance. Angelica moved back to the flat she shared with Peggy, getting back to her songwriting and modelling. Occasionally, Eliza spotted Alex in the streets: going to work, hanging out with his mates John, Lafayette and Hercules, sitting alone in the cafe where they’d got together, gazing at the seat across from him. Sometimes, John or Laf would come and talk to Eliza (like they used to back when she and Alex were together), joking with her, updating her on their lives, and randomly dropping a titbit about Alex. Never did they tell her that she was missed by their friend, but it was always heavily implied.

Among all of this, trying to get over everything and get back to work and life in general, Eliza had completely missed the fact that her periods had stopped coming regularly.

Then, as she was walking to her sisters’ flat with Maria, a sharp pain lanced through her abdomen, and sparks flashed before her eyes. Stumbling on her feet, Eliza almost collapsed onto Maria, who began frantically asking her what was wrong.

“It… hurts…” was all Eliza was able to say before everything went black.

*~*

Playing with an unopened bottle of beer, Alex watched his three best friends scream at the TV, a half-eaten pizza in front of them. There was a big NFL game on, and John had insisted on inviting Herc and Laf over to watch it altogether, with the added bonus of free beer and pizza.

The last couple of months had been some of the hardest in Alex’s life, especially since he had ended up in New York. Without Eliza, everything had tilted, and Alex had been busily scrambling to re-orient himself.

Everything that had gone wrong had come from Alex overworking. He knew that, now.

Working too much and too obsessively had meant he had pushed everyone away: work colleagues, his mates, even Eliza. That had then caused him to get more stressed, and throw himself into work even more, which had eventually led to him being tired, worn and stupid enough that he had made some seriously questionable decisions.

With the help of his friends, his frenemy Burr, and his boss Washington, Alex had pretty much been able to fix his obsession with overworking. He was forever grateful that Eliza had known exactly what was wrong with him and how to help him fix it. That woman knew him better than he knew himself, and he honestly wouldn’t have it any other way.

Speaking of Eliza, her absence felt like a black hole in his chest, right where his heart was supposed to be. Apart from the rare glimpse of her in the street, and the random updates his mates were able to grace him with, Alex hadn’t seen her or talked to her for more than two months.

It was getting to the point where he wanted to try and remedy that, but truthfully? He didn’t have a clue where to start.

Maybe taking her on a date? Alex knew it wasn’t wise to move straight back in (no matter how much he was sick of living with Laurens), and he wanted to start from the beginning again. To prove to her that he was better than before.

Just as Alex was deciding it would be best to get one of Eliza’s sisters on his side to help him with making it up to her, his phone went off. Reaching down, he picked up the phone, eyebrows raised when he saw the call was from Angelica.

Accepting the call, he pressed the phone to his ear. “Angelica?”

“Alex,” the frantic desperation in Angelica’s voice immediately made him sit up. “You need to come, fast.”

“What’s going on?” demanded Alex, fear seeping into his tone, “Is Eliza okay?”

The silence from the other end of the line was answer enough.

“Where is she?” he asked, trying to stop himself from panicking.

“Hospital,” Angelica forced out, making Alex freeze. “I don’t know the name- the one nearest to your and Eliza’s flat.”

“I’m on my way.”

*~*

Sprinting into the hospital’s reception, Alex headed straight for the desk, halting in front of one of the receptionists on duty. “Can I help you, sir?” he asked, looking a little alarmed.

“My fiancee,” Alex said, keeping himself from panicking by a whisker, “Elizabeth Schuyler. Do you know which room she’s in?”

Quickly, the receptionist stuck Eliza’s name into his computer and gave Alex directions to the ward. Nodding in thanks, Alex darted through the doors into the hallways of the hospital, mentally reciting the directions until he reached the right place. Next to the door he’d been told Eliza was in was a row of seats. Sitting in them were Peggy, Angelica and… Maria?

What was she doing here?

When she spotted him, Angelica stood up. “Is she okay?” asked Alex, skidding to a halt.

“She’s as best as can be expected,” Angelica settled on. “Especially since…”

“Since what?”

Peggy spoke up. “She just miscarried.”

The words hit him like a cannonball. Staggering backwards, Alex grabbed the wall to try and hold him up. “She… what?” he finally said.

Looking at Alex with something bordering on sorrow, Angelica replied, “Eliza hadn’t noticed that she’d missed her period more than once in the past few months. The doctors think the baby didn’t have the right amount of chromosomes to develop properly, so she had a miscarriage… but that doesn’t make it hurt any less.”

“She was pregnant,” Alex breathed. “She was pregnant.”

Peggy shrugged. “And the father wasn’t there for any of it.”

Taking the hit as it was due, Alex turned his attention to his fiancee, on the other side of the door. “Can I see her?”

After a long moment of silence, Angelica nodded. “Be careful, Alex,” she cautioned.

*~*

Eliza was dozing when the door to the hospital ward opened, and someone walked up to her bed. “Eliza?”

Grudgingly waking up, Eliza’s eyes met Alex’s. Fighting to stop herself from crying, she reached out a hand. Reverently, Alex took her small, pale hand in his own and placed a kiss to each of her knuckles. There were already tears running down his face.

Falling to his knees next to the starched white hospital bed, Alex reached out to Eliza. “I’m sorry,” he breathed through his tears, “I’m so, so sorry that I wasn’t there for you.”

“Hey,” Eliza reached out a hand and cupped the side of Alex’s face, brushing her thumb across his cheekbone. “It’s okay. I don’t know if you remember, but I was the one who kicked you out.”

“But that was the right thing to do, after I’d done something so idiotic,” Alex pointed out, smiling through his tears. “‘Liza, I-”

Shifting her hand, Eliza pressed a finger to his lips. “Shh.”

Alex shook his head, gently removing her head. “Just hear me out.

“I know I don’t deserve you. I know I never deserved you: you are good, and brave, and kind, and trusting, and you know me better than I know myself. And I know, after this, that if you were a sensible woman, you would kick me out of your life, and I would be thoroughly and completely deserving of it.

“But I am a selfish man, in love with a woman I should never have been granted the blessing to have. And because of this, I can bring myself to hope that - because I know what I did wrong, and I have taken many steps to amend it - maybe the woman I love will let me back into her life. Eliza, if you could just let me stay, and try to make up for all I did wrong, to you and to us, that would be more than enough.”

Tears were streaming down Eliza’s face long before the end of Alex’s speech, and when he finished she cupped his face in her hands and brought it to hers.

“At the beginning of our separation, I wanted to hate you,” she said honestly. “You’d hurt me so bad, Alex, and I didn’t know what to do with myself. Then, my new friend Maria (thanks for that, by the way) told me that, for all your failings, you loved me, and if she knew anything at all, you would be working your hardest to make up for what you did and come back to me.

“Those words gave me hope, and helped me realise that, even after everything you did, I still loved you.” At those words, Alex’s eyes lit up. “I love you, Alex, and I can’t help but want to give you a second chance. Though maybe it’s also because I’m sick of all the pitying looks,” Eliza added, making him chuckle.

“Know what you’re talking about there,” Alex agreed with an eye roll. “The amount of ‘I’m so sorry your relationship didn’t work out, but honestly none of us were expecting it to so why on earth do you care so much?’ drove me up the wall, honestly. How do only our friends seem to understand that I love you, and as far as I care, the rest of them can drown in the East river?”

Giggling, Eliza replied, “Because we’re the exception, Alex, not the rule, remember? We were the couple who could prove every single one of Angie’s gossiping acquaintances wrong, and did it with relish.”

“Ah yes,” Alex winked at Eliza. “Can we get back onto that?”

*~*

Over the next few weeks, Alex and Eliza gradually got to know each other again. Just like at the very beginning of their friendship, walks in the park, meet-ups at lunch and evening texting chains were the norm. They spent just as much of their time together having serious conversations as they did laughing: Alex told Eliza about his long, difficult journey about realising and fixing what had broken their relationship; Eliza told him in return about how hard it was for her living in their flat without him; and they cried together about the baby they didn’t know was coming until it was gone.

Slowly, things became generally brighter again. Eliza was looking at a possible work promotion, her dates with Alex had fallen right back into her life like they’d never left, and weekend trips to a bar or club had become considerably more fun with Maria added to the mix of Alex, Eliza, Peggy, John, Lafayette, Angelica and Hercules. None of the guys had known what to make of her to start with, then she had started joking with John, and things had spiralled from there. She was now secured in their combined friendship group, and enjoyed winding Alex up by saying that if Eliza was actually staying in a relationship with him, it would have to be for something other than his kisses because “I can say from experience that they’re, well…” Then Alex would groan and flip her off, and Eliza would laugh, most of the others joining in.

Four and a half weeks after their conversation in the hospital, Angelica FaceTimed Eliza at ten in the evening. Eliza woke up to the buzz of her phone to find that she’d fallen asleep in her bed while watching something on her laptop.

It wasn’t until Eliza shifted to look for her phone, and the warm lump behind her groaned, that she realised who she had fallen asleep in bed with.

“What’s the time?” slurred Alex, arm heavy round Eliza’s waist.

Grabbing her phone, Eliza switched it on; the light emanating from it was almost blinding in the blackness of their bedroom. “Almost quarter past ten.”

“Hmm…” Suddenly, Alex seemed to actually register what was going on, and he sat up. “Eliza? Wait- how did we end up here?”

“I don’t know,” came Angelica’s amused voice from Eliza’s phone. “But I think this is a sign that it’s about time you moved back in with my sister, Hamilton.”

*~*

Less than a year after Alex was given a chance to make up for one of the stupidest decisions of his life (and he would never be able to thank Eliza enough for that), he was standing in a suit at one end of the aisle of a church, wondering how he managed to get this lucky.

Next to him, John stood, grinning, his hands clasped behind his back. Behind him, filling the pews of the church, was just about everybody Alex knew, and a few people he vaguely recognised from Eliza. Washington smiled proudly in the front row; next to him, Aaron was busily trying to keep Lafayette and Herc from doing something (almost definitely) moronic. On the other side of the aisle, Eliza’s mother Catherine sat, wearing soft blue and being comforted by someone Alex thought was Aaron Burr’s girlfriend - Theodosia, or something?

Music began to play from somewhere, and everyone stood as the doors to the church opened.

The first people down the aisle were Peggy and Maria, with equally bright grins, in identical bridesmaid dresses of Eliza’s favourite sky blue. Following them was Angelica, poised and serene but smiling, in a blush pink dress she’d picked out as Maid of Honour.

Finally, Eliza entered the church on her father’s arm, and it was like the rest of the world fell away.

Her white dress was simple but beautiful, sweeping the floor as she walked. Foregoing a veil, Eliza’s hair was pinned back by clasps decorated with little blue and white flowers, and her bouquet was white roses and blue irises, tied with a pale pink ribbon. Her blue eyes sparkled with joy, and her face seemed to light up with joy the moment she spotted Alex.

She was the most beautiful creature he had ever seen.

When they reached the end of the aisle, Eliza handed her bouquet to Angelica, and Philip put Eliza’s hand in Alex’s. Curling his fingers around hers, Alex raised his head and met Eliza’s eyes. “Hi,” he whispered, smiling.

“Hi,” she whispered back, trying not to giggle. “You ready?”

“As long as you’re here, yes.”