Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Date - Chapter Number / Title

April 2, 1542 - Chapter 10 / Who Knows?

March 3, 1889 - Chapter 19 / Leaving

June 21, 1890 - Chapter 2 / Bridge

June 21, 1890 - Chapter 4 / Answer

July 17, 1910 - Chapter 18 / The Wisdom of Perception

May 15, 1964 - Chapter 5 / Transgression

November 2, 1978 - Chapter 16 / Stroll

April 5, 1987 - Chapter 15 / A Brief Aside

July 12, 1993 - Chapter 13 / Decorum (https://archiveofourown.info/works/66737458)

September 20, 1995 - Chapter 14 / A Little Reflection

May 24, 2004 - Chapter 11 / Resolve

June 12, 2004 - Chapter 7 / Subjugation (https://archiveofourown.info/works/60875899)

October 2, 2004 - Chapter 8 / Passion

May 10, 2005 - Chapter 9 / Festival Wanderings

September 3, 2009 - Chapter 3 / Too Sleepy

April 27, 2011 - Chapter 6 / Swap

December 4, 2011 - Chapter 12 / Hibernation

May 21, 2014 - Chapter 18 / Question

August 10, 2017 - Chapter 17 / Welcome Back

Chapter Text

Days that were delicate; days that spoke with hushed whispers. This was one of those days, in the mind of Yukari. It never meant good news. Possibly neutral. Yet, as she laid by Okina’s side, she thought nothing, staring off into the distance, at the ceiling. She looked at her slumbering form, and thought about how peaceful it was, this moment. 

Okina had stolen much of the covers and wrapped herself in them, but that was fine, even adorable. She thought about a lot of things. Whether there were any places where she would need to strengthen the barrier after they created it, that she gave Ran a message to not wake them up today, what they would do today, some vague memory from hundreds of years ago, a regret sooner than that, and more.

Okina stirred beside her, and reached out with a finger to touch her neck, the ribbon still tied around it. Yukari looked at her gesture with contentness, then turned to her and embraced her. They held each other, feeling the warmth and the gentle rise and fall of their chests, listening to their individual breathing. Neither budged nor spoke for a long while, until Yukari gave her a small kiss on her cheek, to which Okina responded with a sigh.

“Cute…” Yukari said.

She laughed. “So are you.”

“I have something to tell you. And I need you to take it slowly.”

As suspected this morning, her heart dropped, but she didn’t show that. Nonchalantly, she asked, “Ah, what is it?”

She smiled with a tender yet uneasy sorrow, like a shining pane of glass. “Well, I don’t even know where to begin… but the gist of it is that my presence in Gensokyo may disappear for the time being. At least, I’m considering to have some length of a break in the Outside World for my own reasons… I’ve been thinking about this for a long time. We've finished the project, haven't we?”

Her teacup fell from her hands and shattered on the floor with sharp and crystalline notes, the fragments flying, along with what was left of the tea inside. Yukari ignored the sting of the embedded shards in her legs and the leaking blood. Even briefer, the thought of needing to clean it up. 

She stared at Okina. “You can’t be. Surely, you must be joking. If you are, it isn’t a funny one.”

Okina opened her mouth, then closed it, processing what she said, until she herself was ready to speak again. “I’m sorry, I am not, and I can’t tell you the reason yet. The time will come when I can. It’s something that I feel that I must do.”

“No, no, there’s a reason why we left the Outside World behind, correct? The project to create Gensokyo and form a paradise for those involved as representatives. Why would you leave it now?” Her visage started to crack through her words in front of the one she loved so much. “True, nothing has changed much for the past few hundred years except the new barrier. But is there something unsatisfactory? We could discuss it and see what could be done. You know how much I want to make it as perfect as we can.”

She pressed her lips together. “To be pedantic, we can’t call it having left the Outside if we’re having little escapades back into it, and no, there hasn’t been anything about Gensokyo that I want to change. It’s fine the way it is right now. At least, the balance is, I think. The slightly weakened barrier is better than the original plan, which was too strong.”

“If we can return to the Outside World anytime we desire with our abilities and alternate ways of entrance in our respective dimensions, then what is the reason as to why you want to disappear completely from Gensokyo? I hope you didn’t forget the duties we entrusted you with, either.”

Conflict flashed over her features as she sighed, propping her elbows up on the table and placing her face on her hands. “I knew this would happen. I suppose you could call it a new start for myself, but that’s all about what I can give you. And never, I’ll continue to keep watch and guard over the outside of the border. I can do that without needing to enter.”

While this feeling wasn’t new, the variety of it was devastating in a way it was difficult to put words to. Yukari placed her hand over her heart, gritting her teeth. “Yes, but I meant it in the sense that I would be the only one left in Gensokyo… Kasen hasn’t appeared to us since she went off into the mountains to pursue… her own path. All of the other oni have departed for either form of Hell as well…”

“Kasen is Kasen, and she can do as she likes. I haven’t seen her either, but I wish her good fortune… And don’t be so despondent. You know where I am, and I’ll come back someday. It’s not like I’m cutting myself off from you, and I can visit you too, just not in Gensokyo.”

Yukari stood and walked to the window, looking out of it at the places beyond, to avoid her eyes.

Okina stood, hobbled over to her, and embraced her.

Yukari sank to her knees with her head bowed. “I don’t want you to leave Gensokyo. I beg of you. If you’ve been thinking about it for a long time, why didn’t you at least mention it before? Must you have to be so unpredictable? You never tell me about your plans half the time, even after how long I’ve known you!”

“I… yes, ah, yeah, I should’ve…” She took a deep breath, her words ending in a defeated jumble and a pause. Yukari could sense her previous strong and firm countenance crumbling as she sat down beside her. “It’s my fault… Even if I keep promising, I keep failing… I feel like sorry isn’t enough here… But, erm, how about this? You’ll know for certain when I return. Is that okay?” 

“I dislike your tone.”

Her face twisted into a grimace, struggling to keep any composure. “Uwah…”

“I suspect that nothing I say can convince you.” A burning hatred of this situation blossomed within herself, but it couldn’t be helped. “Don’t come back until you can prove yourself reliable again and have released some of your nature. I mean it.”

A silence lay in between them, unbroken until they gathered themselves.

Okina sighed heavily. “I accept. And yes… our paths are diverging. It causes you great pain, and it does to me too. But this pain will be necessary for everyone. I firmly believe that we’ll be glad this happened, years later, when we reflect upon it. We have to believe. I don’t want this to be half-baked.”

Turning towards her, she shook her head. “You place so much presumption and confidence in that statement. It’s hard to believe you. My heart wants to trust you but my history does not.”

Her hand gripped her hand, downcast eyes hesitantly meeting hers. “Well, no living being can remain static forever.”

“My soul is beheld in selfishness… And that is true. But that takes time for anyone to accept.”

“Mine as well. So be it.”

“Please stay with me.”

“Then, I can, just a little longer.”

Tears began to leak from Yukari’s eyes. Pulling a hankerchief from a backdoor, Okina leaned over and wiped them off. She recognized the design. She gave that as a gift to her nearly sixty years ago. And what she meant.

Yukari sprung and grabbed her shoulders, gazing upward at her. Their lips met gently, as if to absorb all the time they could, that was left remaining, with soft moans between them. Okina held her closer, hands moving up her back as they shared their warmth. To convey every amount of passion for each other, and their own separate and combined understanding of their past. A measure of hope, worry, and apprehension for the new days to come. Only when she was satisfied, did she climb off of her.

“Remember, you can visit me anytime. Well, that isn’t entirely true, so let’s put it as most times, okay?” Okina patted her on the head. “It’s almost time for me to leave. Satono has been asking for me… I guess this is goodbye. Thank you for everything.”

“May the wind be always at your back. Farewell… Okina.”

With a last difficult look back at her, Okina opened a door on her back and jumped in.

After she went, her tears fully turned into sobs for the first time in a century or two.

“Don’t go…”

Chapter Text

“Lady Yukari, it’s time to wake up.”

The faintest hint of consciousness barely heard her, but did not stir. Buried completely under the covers, and curled up, warm and comfortable. A gentle prod and another harder prod, forcing her to acknowledge it, but refuse to move.

“Lady Yukari, it’s almost noon. You told me to wake you up before then. We have a party to go to today at the Hakurei Shrine in the evening, but we need to do our usual duties before that.”

Silence.

“I’m simply following your command.”

Slightly more awake now, she groaned and mumbled, “Just another hour or two, pleaseee.”

Ran sighed. “Again? I suppose I’ll have to get you out of there somehow.” She grabbed the covers, and pulling at them, threw them off.

Too cold! And the audacity! Yukari held her arm over her closed eyes in an attempt to block out the invasive daylight. “Nghhh, Ran, you know that I require my beauty sleep! Go away!”

“No. I will remain here and bother you until you assist me in the upkeep of these critical barriers after the latest incident, and any other assorted maintenance. The first is the foremost task we must address, Lady Yukari, and cannot be done alone.”

Seeing no other option, Yukari opened a gap, and placing a hand in there, snatched her hat and placed it on top of her own head. “Hehehe, look, it’s my nightcap now. I will pile it on the seventh hat I have stolen from you… I hope you don’t miss them!”

As if she’d seen this situation enough for it to repeat multiple times, Ran stood there with an unamused and blank expression, not reacting to the theft of her hat. Ah, well, why not have a little fun at her expense? Yukari took it off and moved her finger in the air in circles, the hat rotating along with it until it flew back at Ran and landed on her chest. Oops, that was meant to stay on her finger. But, it was not like it was necessary to measure the centrifugal force needed to keep it in line, hmm? With a sigh, Ran grabbed it, put it back on, rolled her eyes, and tapped her foot impatiently.

Yukari smirked and opened another gap, Ran’s fluffy tails sprouting out of it. Soft and perfect for her replacement pillow, she hugged them and rubbed her face into them. “Don’t move. I’m going back to sleep with your tails.”

Turning around, she shook her head and also wagged her finger at her. “Any more sleep for you is forbidden. This is absurd.”

Her tails slipped out of her grasp until she hugged thin air. Left with only the gap floating in front of her, she pouted. “Yes, this quite is, especially as it’s the best thing since sliced bread… Oh, no more sleep for the rest of my existence? You cruel, cruel shikigami. Am I resigned to sleep deprivation? You wouldn’t want to see me when I am sleep-deprived. That is when the cranky arises. And the cranky is scary.” Raising her hands, she fluttered her fingers in that intended-to-be creepy way like a vampire would.

Ran huffed. “I am sorry, Lady Yukari, but I will have to push you off. And I do not fear such a thing, especially as I have been with you for so long. The instances of you refusing to get out of bed amount to over nine thousand!”

It was her turn to cringe at the reference and double down harder. “Is that so? Watch and weep as I change the border of heavy and light!” With that, she fiddled with the border, changing her weight to that equal to a stone statue.

In the instant that the bed groaned like a squeaky door that hadn’t seen oil for ages, she changed the weight that it could hold, and the floor too, in case. To check, she ran a few compression calculations within her mind to conclude that her little tricks weren’t going to make it collapse in spite of them. Whew. Better safe than sorry. Ran reached over, placing her hands on her side, and strained to move her even a bit. Predictably, it was like she was trying to push against a cliff. Same with pulling, as if that was a loophole. Did she make a mistake in her programming again or was it just her being daft through impatience?

With a pout, Ran looked up at her. “Why are you being this difficult?”

“I should ask the same of you.”

“Through the power that you have taught me, I should be able to increase my pure strength to such a point that I can indeed move you, but not to a point of overdoing it. In that case, it will be easier to pick you up and carry you off. That is what I will do.” She began the required spells and equations to modify her power, the formation of the energy palpable in the air.

To be fair, she was already wide awake by this whole ordeal anyway, so if Ran princess-carried her off to the dining room, it would be the highlight of the day. “Oh. Okay.”

In that split second, she ceased them, her fingers darting over. Pinch. Pinch. Like a child, her cheeks were unceremoniously being played with and pulled at. If Yuyuko, Suika, or Okina were here, they would have died laughing. Well, she didn’t expect this, so perhaps she should give the credit to Ran for tricking her. A known trait of the kitsune she embodied, after all.

Glaring at her, Yukari mumbled, “Oh, no you don’t.”

“I may not get to do it often, but I always enjoy it when I can.”

As soon as she let up and leaned back, looking quite satisfied with herself, Yukari leapt off the bed and retaliated, poking and pinching at her cheeks and making kissy noises at her. Even with her own annoyance, she enjoyed the initial reaction of surprise and irritation back, despite how smug Ran was through it too. Maybe she should tease her like that again, as a gratifying series of callbacks, besides the enjoyment inherent within.

“Aren’t you an adorable fox?” she asked, her tone low and sickly-sweet. “Aww, I could do this all day. Such fluffy tails, such fluffy personality, such fluffy indignation, such fluffiness you have. So much cuteness within one package…” Yukari continued her ramble.

After her stream of cooing finally stopped, Ran cheekily nodded as if the entire process didn’t happen. “Ah, I see that you are out of bed now, Lady Yukari. Please hurry up, we have a lot to do, and we do not have all day.”

Yukari sighed. “Well then, I concede defeat to my dear shikigami.”

In turn, she chuckled. “And I shall claim my victory with grace. I have done it!”

Chapter Text

Another cycle, seasons unceasing, tied to the transitions between life, death; the necrofantasia suspended in the middle. Auspicious, a severed and reformed balance, a distant memory of her warm hand. So, she chose the summer solstice, when day triumphed over night. It was a mirror. Like her, light was no significant action.

The occasion that bound the weakness of youkai and that god together as one. Precious, wasn't it? Tugging at her heartstrings in such a way. That stubborn fool of a god, ah, to wish to lash her own tongue at her, to call that to her arrogant yet lovely face. True, to already have the ability to do such a thing and the opportunity in the future.

…No. It would be too harsh, too pathetic, to tread on her wish. A challenge of honor, of strength, showing up a damned lesson in this purgatory. Can't fault that, can't fault that. Very well. Now, who was the stubborn fool here? The overly earnest and reckless god or the set-in-her-ways and cowardly youkai? 

For a while, they drove harmony to complement, even with their disparate threads running through the tapestry. An old but familiar feeling emerged like a burrowing worm from the soil, yet she dared not place a name to it, because it could not have any. One fine day, long from now, they would face again in battle here. And with that vow, another forlorn tear rolled down her cheek.

Chapter Text

Flickering electric signs and lights, smashed windows, and firmly shut metal gates lined the street, with glassine envelopes scattered in the nooks and crannies. Across the walls and doors, there laid the murals, the colorful bubble letters and the simple messy tags, some drawn over, but mostly legible, though there wasn’t much point to decipher such things. Nearer to them, two drunkards stumbled about, and a few more were passed out on the sidewalk with an ugly pile of vomit sitting on the gutter.

As for the two figures coming down this way… One was in a casual black dress accented with lilac lace, a matching set of black gloves, and blue high heels. A blue ribbon was tied around her neck, with her long hair was mostly loose, except for the two blue bows on the bottom of the two shorter lengths framing her face.

The other carried a simple wooden cane, and was in a practical grey suit and skirt, paired with black ankle boots, with her hair bound in a ponytail. She was taller than her companion, yet they were both quite tall. It almost seemed like they derived from their surroundings, as if they were cut from the exact same vibe that extended through it all. Only a little bit of knowledge would have swept away that impression though, a half-truth.

At the far but near end, some amount of cash was getting exchanged under a dark red awning, for a different kind of business than for what was printed on the sign. That would indeed make a person wonder if the owner knows, and whether they care if they do. And on the other side of the street, a small group of vagrants loitered about, lighting up brief flames for their cigarettes. Their wandering attention turned toward the two women walking along, merely keeping to themselves.

“Now those are some sexy-ass ladies over there.”

A whistle came from one of them. “Yeah, hot damn, they’re making my balls ache. She’s showing off that cleavage. Man, I wish I could get a woman like that.”

Her showing off was truly only dedicated to one person. The one beside her. Okina and Yukari ignored them, despite more jeering catcalls coming after their passing by. The glow of neon pink and red briefly reflected on their faces, until replaced by the shadows and then more blue and green to vice-versa again. 

Okina glanced at Yukari, rolled her eyes, and shook her head a bit. Yukari simply gave her a small but conniving smile. Of course, that was an easy sign of her plotting a dangerous idea, when most of the time, it was difficult to tell what was going on in her head. Or maybe, they had it in mind already, especially in these times of a different, invisible rejection.

“If I had my way, they would be regretting their words right now,” Okina said. “But they’re not worth the bother.”

“A good shock is what everyone needs from time to time.” She agreed with her second sentence, however.

“Hah, I’m sure we can aim for that, and bigger fish. What’s another to this world?”

A few minutes later, Okina reached over and pulled open the metal door, letting Yukari in first. Soon it closed with a heavy click. It wasn’t a pristine type of place, but neither was it a shabby kind of place. Clouds of smoke hung around, actively contributed to by a few men, and no big crowd at the moment. Off further into the bar, a jukebox was playing a rock song as a form of background noise, enough to not be intrusive in conversations. Someone hovered nearby, waiting to drop another quarter in for three more songs after that last one drew to a close.

That noticeable argument of four laborers having just gotten off their shift, a quadruplet of college students making bets, the furtive conversation of three teenagers that snuck in with fake IDs, trying not to mention anything about school, the chat of a down-on-his-luck gambler and his musician friend, a suited-up man nursing some whiskey alone and sobbing into it, and the two old men in stained overalls ordering from one of the two bartenders. Someone with a thousand-yard stare at nothing, where it was quite easy to guess where they had been in the range of the years before, unfortunately. 

All strange in their own way, no doubt about it. The definition included the god and herself, the mysterious and supernatural entity. At the same time, they drew the attention of a few of the other patrons, unused to having them there. Maybe some were looking to score, as they call it in this city.

Locating two free spots at the bar next to each other, they hopped onto the barstools and waited for the bartenders. Okina placed her cane against the bar, pulled out some cash, and put it on top. The power of having pockets, wasn’t it? She briefly smiled and winked at Yukari in the meantime, which she returned. The prices were posted on the wall, quite simply. A dollar and sixty for a well, a dollar and ninety for a call. On tap, a dollar and twenty-five. Bottles, a dollar. That was it.

Okina chuckled. “Not bad so far, slightly rough. Their composition needs some trimming for it to be more focused and have a good punch, but they landed the ending of that song quite well. Six out of ten.” She rambled some more about the possible theoretical aspects of music theory that could be applied to the song.

Music, heavily tied to counterculture and certain classes, wasn’t it? A universal language in itself, relating to almost everything. Community, fashion, behavior, theater and other arts… social status. Even as she watched and saw almost all, as the most well-informed, such more in-depth understanding could only be known by a specialist. Her own tastes laid in the way of provocative yet timeless pieces, but she could appreciate a few more contemporary styles.

Just as Yukari was about to reply to her observations, the bartender came over. Although he raised an eyebrow, he didn’t say anything to the effect of his thoughts. “Hey, ID?”

“Hi, here you go.” Okina gave them to him, then pointed at the stack of cash in front of her. “Here’s fifteen dollars total for now.”

He looked them over, handed the perfect fakes back, and nodded. “What can I get you both?”

“I’ll have a vodka cranberry.”

“A martini please, thank you.”

“Right on it.”

She changed the topic, feeling no need to comment on her music comment from earlier. Instead, something else was on her mind, and she turned her position to face her. “Okina… wherever one goes, they may take a piece with them. However, a stone is a stone, unless a boulder tramples it. Whoever one meets, they take a piece as well, and leave another. However, certain parts of these pieces become fantasy. In truth, how much of one is themselves?”

Okina raised an eyebrow, ready in her mode as a teacher herself. “What a strange question. But I understand why you speak of it like that. Memories are a fragile thing. But I believe that there are four basic pieces that fit together. One is a person of solitude, another is a person of company, the third is the person of experience, and the last is the person of ideals. Obviously, each informs every other.

As for me, a god of many facets, I am more of a conglomerate than the typical stone, and am much more of the last two mentioned, which then provides me with the being to be the first two. Thus, it would vary among every person. Memory is experience, but it can also be that of solitude. Except, the more that one can get, the more beneficial it is, to have it to recall.”

Yukari’s features softened in an adoring look, with a hint of something else. “You answered it how I expected you to.”

“…Is that good or bad?”

“What do you think?”

Interrupting their talk, the bartender leaned forward and whispered, “Excuse me, ladies, but you may want to consider movin’ to a more private spot, or leavin’ before the rougher types come in.”

Yukari snapped her head to stare at him as her trademark creepy grin grew larger. “No.”

Unnerved, he glanced warily around, avoiding her gaze. “Well, suit yourselves. Don’t say that I didn’t warn you.” He gave them their drinks as Yukari set aside the amounts for them and the respective tips. With that understanding of the arrangement, he went on to serve another customer.

“How ridiculous. One oni would surpass them all.” Okina chuckled. “But, that was exquisite, Yukari. Now, where were we? Ah yes, I was also going to ask you why you thought of that sort of question. But first, a toast to you!”

“And thank you. I take pride in such delicately imposing responses. Oh, it was simply a thought that I decided to speak about. To you.”

Their glasses clinked together, and they took their first sip.

“Given the specificity, I know you enjoy your little teasing games. As to what I think… I’ve already said it.”

“If you desire it to be. That’s my Okina, leaving no stone unturned.”

She pouted. “Hey, it’s a trait that I can be proud of!”

“Yes, it is. Poke.” With a cheeky smile, Yukari poked her on one of her breasts.

Okina huffed in pretend annoyance. “Knock it off, I am not going to sit here for you to press buttons on me all night.”

She giggled. “I just wanted to see your reaction. Very well, I’ll continue to do it until you stop my hand.”

Placing her hand on her heart, she touched her hand lightly with the other. “So, does this mean that you are wanting to provide me with a massage? Or acupuncture, then?”

“No, I suppose you desire my tickles.” Another light tap to her on the cheek.

She drew back like lightning and held up her hands in front of her. “Ahhh, no, anything but that! Don’t you dare!”

Yukari sipped from her drink, making a satisfied noise. “What, a big mighty god like you is still afraid of tickles? Even if it doesn’t compute in comparison to your stature, it’s too adorable for me to resist. Maybe I should test them out when you’re unaware.”

Red colored her face, brightened somewhat by the lighting. “It’s like an inherent weakness!”

“Is that so? I’ll be sure to tell that to the next enemy to confront you.”

Okina took a deep breath, shook her finger at her, and placed it vertically over her lips. “Don’t you dare blab about my secrets.” Not more than a second after that, she burst out laughing and lowered her arm.

The bar began to fill up as the minutes passed, the evening regulars and others filing in. More people took the seats at the bar, with some standing, and the volume level steadily rose, but the jukebox could still be heard over the undercurrent of the din. Discussions, requests, and little topics. A song of a currently well-known yet underground band. Okina’s smile at that flyby play, since she enjoyed that band, and her excited explanation to her patient listening about their four-album-and-going discography.

Bottle-keep for some wine. Lagers, ales, and stouts. What’s going on in France. Vietnam. When they can expect the deal to be closed by, any problems that might come up. New books to read, bestselling books. The clinks of glasses. Friends’ get-together tomorrow. Details about a wife, glances over to them as if afraid of offense. Cuba libre. Of course, many gawked at them too, unsubtle imaginations and whispers flying about. Others, more sensibly, were just here for the booze and their companions. For now, for them, another round of drinks, and the devil may care.

Okina jumped, glancing downward, then at Yukari, then at the suspect passerby. An indignant and stormy frown formed on her face, and she punched her fist into her hand. “The absolute audacity!”

“What was that?” Yukari glanced in the direction she was looking in, only slightly concerned by whatever incident that was.

She sighed. “I suppose that this is part of our little operation, putting ourselves in the line of fire. We can spring the trap on them next time with that casus belli.”

A man, dark-haired, clean-shaven except for a mustache, and what most people would call handsome, sidled up to them. “Hey, sorry if I’m interruptin’ somethin’, but you’re both so beautiful. In fact, I’d say out of this world. Gals, would either of you like to go for a dance?”

Though catching their gaze, they both look through him, quite indifferent to what he said. “No, thank you.”

“Come on, it’ll be fun, hey, hey, I’ll buy you both a drink. I’m Jacob, call me Jake for short. Can I get your names please?” He said, in a slightly nasal voice, and slapped down some money on the counter. It was a decent sum of American dollars, many would have been impressed by it. But other than money, what could he offer?

Without bothering to show interest in the bills, they didn’t reply to him after that either, swapping to English in their resumed conversation. Someone lit up nearby and blew out smoke, with it drifting across the place. It obscured the man’s head, and he tried to wave it away, throwing daggers from his eyes at the long-haired guy who made it.

Yukari yawned. Bottom of the barrel pickup lines, much less than unimpressive. “I’ve seen lots of ants running around lately. They seem tiresome.”

“Ah, yes, but I’ve heard being busy is a good thing. There’s many subjects that are interesting to study, like electronics, construction, chemistry, and the art of meditation. Beyond those, there are more exotic things, such as silkworm breeding. I specialize in the last one myself.”

“I know. However, those subjects are much more sophisticated than sitting around, waiting for something to happen.”

“It’s one of the keys to a peaceful life. Any person should hope for a peaceful life without too many problems.”

“Nuisances… a dime a dozen. Yet, one needn’t pay for a nuisance. They simply show up on their own. Like tree bubbles. Or a lousy insect.”

“So that’s how it is?” Seeing that his words fell on deaf ears and realizing the meanings of theirs, he left, flipping up his thumb back at them. “Fuckin’ stuck up, they think they’re too good for me? I was all nice and such to them, and these bitches started insulting me? Guys, did you see that?”

Someone who seemed to be his friend walked up behind Okina, as if trying to impose his shadow over her. But he was a tad too short even for her sitting height, rendering it ineffective. “Yeah, why are they at the bar anyway? Shouldn’t they be sitting in the back? I won’t be able to handle myself at this rate…”

The bearded man next to her said in a baritone voice, “Disgusting. Ey, don’t swear in front of them, don’t you know your manners? Where’s the gentlemen these days?”

“Back off, man. You don’t know what being a gentleman is, by your looks. You probably don’t even get any pussy. Me, I’m on Easy Street, but I like the girls that are tougher to crack, y’know. You get me? In fact, I bet you only cum into your hand every night, man.” He laughed and slapped his shoulder.

Turning around, he glared at him. “Shut up. You ain’t even remembering the names of the women you pick up. Nah, nah, come back when you got a real wife you can love like I do. Moron.”

A wave of discomfort passed through the bar, but not for her and Okina. Their only focus was on each other, ah, and yet to have people fight over them, how delicious. The metal door swung open as some hopped-up businessmen, somewhat out of place themselves, barged in with laughter and excited yelling, unaware of what just happened, but shrugging the mood off anyway. The two guys continued to argue with each other, a hurt ego taken down a notch, a hole getting dug further. Even the one defending them, restrictive in his own predefined way, but she could at least appreciate the attempt, like a little puppy with much to learn and experience.

“It’s extraordinary how easy it is to rile them up with nothing,” Okina said in Japanese, downing the rest of her glass. “It’s almost no effort. Their beliefs simply told them that our presence is offensive. It’s the same thing, but in opposite ways.”

“Oh, they cannot resist as they have never done any introspection, and fear alienation from their peers. We could almost pity them for not knowing any better. Believing their way is the default way, the way of the world… Flies to honey.” Yukari placed her arm on the counter and propped herself up with her hand.

She glanced at her empty glass. “Well, here’s to another… How are you feeling about a pint?”

“Variety is the spice of life, isn’t it?”

In places like this, more conversation about things that no one around them could understand kept the heat off and the interest low. That was, unless focus was their fortitude. Never mind the mental fixations, the constant desiring and carnal peeps and looks upon their bodies, nor the pathetic begging admirers trying their nonexistent luck. 

The art and ease of hiding in plain sight obscured their true relation and closeness, but they cared less and less, and slowly left their restraint off as the evening went on, ready to face the quite predictable consequences. A little chaos to spice it up, hmm? A piece of “hell let loose,” perhaps. Such a nice phrase. Or an incident? To have eyes for only one person here, and to have that reciprocated. How magnificent. How devoted. How fortunate.

Okina moved her chair closer to Yukari and leaned inward. “What a pretty woman you are.”

“Mmm, thank you.” Noting a tinge of her natural and lovely scent, she narrowed her eyes and brushed her finger against her neck briefly in adoration. “You are more than me. Simply stunning.”

“No, you are.”

“I suppose we’ll have to agree to disagree.” A little arousal alit within her, along with a growing desire to have her under her, and at her mercy.

It seemed like Okina had other plans though, moving her hand and placing it over her upper thigh. Yukari smirked at it, though her breath quickened as Okina rubbed her in that spot, and then removed her hand to have another sip of her drink. She gazed at her, taking her figure all in, from especially the warm and inviting hunger in her eyes for her, to her broad shoulders, sumptous breasts, round stomach, and the way downward to her legs.

“Liking what you see, babe?” Okina chuckled, lacing her fingers through hers and interlocking them, though she trembled a little.

She noticed the latter. Something extra to enjoy for both of them. Yukari licked her lips, then reached out and touched her collarbone. “Of course. Such a sight to behold… I want you.”

Okina removed her hand from her grasp and placed both of them on her shoulders, soon moving to cup the sides of her face. A brief pause for a moment to admire her, then she leaned forward for a kiss. Their lips met softly, slowly deepening as Okina shifted her hand to the back of her neck. Yukari quietly moaned, wrapped an arm around her waist, and placed her hand on her side, pulling her in closer and squeezing the both of them together. 

A familiar yet not familiar voice interrupted them. “Hey, what are they doing… damn, so they’re dykes. I get it, I don’t mind dykes, but oh man, I’m getting hard just from that. You think they would want a threesome?”

“Ugh, they’re like that? It’s still disgusting. A woman with a man, that’s how it should be. And here they’re doing it in front of us, shoving it into our faces.”

“What the hell, this again? You don’t need to watch, you know. Just leave them alone.”

Aware of the stares of these strangers, Yukari smiled into the kiss and raised a middle finger at them.

“The fuck? Now she’s telling us to fuck off? What kind of woman does that?”

“They’re dykes, they hate men!”

“I’m yours…” Okina whispered in English into her ear, and gave her another peck on her cheek.

They drew back, smiling at each other and clasping their hands together in front of them as the unneeded commotion around them rose once more. A partially full drink soared by, the glass shattering at some point behind, along with its contents falling down to the ground. From the screams, someone got the receiving end of that. Yukari cast a threatening sneer over to the one who threw it, an old man getting restrained by his fellows as he slung more slurs at them and yelled about their respectability. How they were proof of the decline of society, coming out of the woodwork like this. Ridiculous claims.

Okina stood up, turned toward him, and rolled her eyes with pure contempt. “From my point of view, you are the one in the wrong. Accosting us like this… it’s quite obvious, yes?”

“Woah, they didn’t even flinch,” the bearded man said. “I gotta say, respect.”

An intentional hand brushed against Yukari’s ass, but not that particular gentle yet firm touch of Okina’s. Time froze for a second as surprise turned into anger, and into a greater fury. Knowing exactly who it belonged to, Yukari whipped around and jabbed him in the chest, sending him toppling against several other people, who absorbed the impact. Why, to take advantage of the situation at hand like this, how foul. She longed to utterly crush and destroy the human who did that. But that would alter the occasion into damage control, and such things were too much of a hassle. So, sharp words and light blows, it was.

“No one except her can touch me like that.”

He got up, glaring at her as he slurred his words. “You queer, I’ll fuck you straight. You can taste my cock as I ram it down your throat. So what, you got a lucky shot on me? Some women need to be put in their place again these days.”

Yukari grinned and laughed. “A warning shot indeed. I was holding back. If you’re smart, you’ll turn around and run away.”

“I’m gonna beat you up! I don’t care who you are! A fucking whore like you, you fucking bitch…”

She cracked her knuckles. “Fufufu, this should be fun. You’ll end this night in the most beautiful agony.”

Advancing, he punched at her, but she stepped to the side and caught his fist cold, like a brick wall. The man stared at her in disbelief, wondering about her strength. Yukari calmly took her other hand, placed it on his arm, and twisted. Snap. A howl of pain followed, and she kicked him away with her leg, with another few cracks. That kick must have crushed a few ribs. Nothing serious enough to result in a fatality, but quite well-deserved.

“Enjoy the taste of your own medicine.”

A middle-aged man shouted, “Call the cops, they’ll help drag them right out. Or we gotta do it first, They’ve been disturbing the peace for too long. Get them outta sight.”

Okina slapped her weighty cane against her hand. “Oh really? The next fool to try hurting us will have the honor of being the second to be struck down.” Another one of the bigots from earlier snuck over to grab Okina from her back. An idiotic mistake. Sensing him, she swung her cane, causing a sickening crack on his right shoulder and another harsh blow to his right side. “Too slow.”

He stumbled backward, fell on the floor, and groaned, reaching for his shoulder from the throbbing and dull pain. As she walked up to him, the man tried to scramble away, cowering behind one of the barstools. His hands gripped the legs tightly enough that his knuckles turned white. Tears dripped from his eyes as he wiped them off, aware of his supposed dignity stripped away. Yukari reveled in the tasty fear and humiliation within them.

“Don’t hit me again! Please! I’m sorry for what I said!”

“Then never do that again. Examine your prejudices and reconsider who you are.” Gazing at the cowering man, she scoffed and raised his chin with her cane to make him lock eyes with her. “You won’t remember who we were, but you will remember the reasons behind these wounds. Away with you.”

Next to her, Yukari grasped her hand. “Darling…”

With a big unamused sigh, Okina tapped her cane on the floor twice and looked around at the gathering crowd. “If all of you don’t want any more trouble, then I suggest letting us go. I’ve had enough of your insolent demands and thoughtless sayings.”

Understanding that, the crowd hesitated and parted, talking among themselves and gaping at the two of them. Separating the faintest hint of faraway police sirens from the music and shouting, they shoved past the confused and angry patrons and onlookers. Before any of the latter could block their way, they walked out of there as Yukari calculated precisely the amount of time to get to the next block over at their current pace, accounting for Okina as necessary, to set the pace. Plenty of time.

The next block over, there stood some people, after all, this residential area was never entirely deserted. But with the shadows drawn from tall buildings and closed shops without lit signs, it was enough to disguise her ability. Ah, so there were some malevolent energies following them, so as Okina said. With a glance backward, revealing it to be clear, Yukari opened up a gap, a purple slit in the world with bows on its ends, a personal touch of hers. Strange eyes gazed out from it. She and Okina got in, the gap closing behind them just as some pursuers rounded the corner in a sprint. Getaway complete.

They arrived at the entryway to her house on the border of Gensokyo, taking off their shoes and stuffing them into the nearby cubby. Yukari closed the gap behind them with a flick of her wrist and smirked, knowing perfectly well what she was going to do. She turned to Okina, pushing her against the wall, their breasts rubbing together as she looked up at her.

“Ran and Chen are away on errands. They won’t be back for a while,” Yukari quickly said, shifting her hands to her shoulders for an easier hold. "Mmm, that look on your face… makes me so excited."

“Good.” With the scent of alcohol on her breath, Okina began to pant, gazing down to her exposed breasts and back up. “I’ve been trying to resist for too long myself. It’s been so difficult. Let me suck on them, please.”

“Oh, aren’t you so bold? Very well.” She unzipped her dress, letting them free. “Our little secret worked quite well, didn’t it? You must have been so hot and bothered while attempting to maintain that decorum. Then, how about going to a more suitable location first?”

“Let’s go. I’m so horny, it’s killing me,” she whined. “Do you know how much willpower I’ve spent over the past few hours?”

“Indeed. It’s adorable, isn’t it? Watching you imperceptibly squirm and quake, and all the while having something naughty and pleasurable shoved inside of you, filling you all up, that no one else around knows about.” 

Okina threw her head back and gasped. “I want you to fuck my brains out. I want to feel every single thing you’ll do to me.”

With a giggle as a reply, Yukari led her to a guest bedroom and sat down on the bed, removing her gloves and placing them on the nightstand. They both still smelled heavily of smoke, after all. Okina embraced her from behind, tugging off the rest of her dress. Her hands caressed her boobs and rubbed her hard nipples in circles. Though unwilling to give up control, Yukari moaned from the sensation, but she opened up a gap, smacking and groping her ass for that in retaliation. A shout of surprise, and so Okina stopped and begged for her to continue the spanking, to which she relented. Even without looking at her face, she knew she had gotten her. Yukari took the opportunity, whipping around and pushing her down onto the bed. She grabbed her falling cane and set it aside.

Her eyes gazed intently into her dazed gaze, as if to take her all in. Then, she launched into a graceful yet messy kiss, as her hands gripped the back of Okina’s head, pressing her in further. Their bodies met, bare skin against cloth. Okina soon touched her tongue against hers, playing with each other, exploring as they had done a thousand times before, but with never the same experience. A comforting one to share, as if it was the collective memory of their first and the ones after, enhanced and added on to by their long time together.

Chapter Text

Rubbing her hands together, Yukari opened a gap, crouched, and stood up halfway into it. The destination opened in the air in front of Okina, causing her to jump and let an exasperated breath out. She stuck out of it upside-down, her long hair almost touching the wooden floor, and a sly grin stretching across her face. Ah, the good ol’ comfortable reading on the couch. What was she reading? An Outside World novel by the name of “The Silmarillion.”

“Ah, it’s you, Yukari,” she said, keeping her eyes on her book. “What brings you here today?”

“Ahoy there, Okina! Could you provide me with a sword?”

Removing her attention from the book, she tilted her head and turned her gaze towards her, an eyebrow raising. “Why do you need a sword? And what makes you think I have one lying around in this day and age?”

“A prank, of course.”

Okina smiled and shook her head. “What, you couldn’t have taken it from some unsuspecting owner? Why come to me?”

Yukari blew a kiss over and waved her hand. “See, I’m a sensible woman, and I ask for things nicely from my lovers. Besides, why not be a teensy tiny complicit in it?”

“Alright, alright.” She replaced the bookmark and sat up. “I do require the payment of an answer as to what kind of prank you’ll be using it for. I might have to go rooting around in the older storage rooms… who knows how much accumulated junk and other stuff I have that I don’t even remember having.”

“You probably require a spring cleaning, don’t you? I wonder how many of your memories are buried around the place.” Yukari righted the gap and stepped out of it, sitting down next to her and lacing her fingers through hers.

Her voice turned distant. “I’ll do that later…”

“That’s what you always say…”

As she came back to reality, she said, “Oh, don’t be a hypocrite, Yukari. We both know that you have a lot of curios and dusty things lying about too.”

“I suppose that I cannot argue with that.” She giggled and reached for a feather duster out of a gap. "There! Let us spirit away the dust from this realm of yours.”

“That thing? Satono and Mai would protest if I made them use such old-fashioned implements, and I'd never hear the end of it.”

“Is that so? Every tool has its place, you know.”

“Don't talk like you're the one doing the cleaning regularly.”

An array of doorways appeared in front of them. Some looked different from others, for example, one was made out of oak, another, cedar, a few unidentifiable… and they were painted various colors and had various designs and auras. Some dreary, sone jubilant, some mournful, and much more.

Okina looked at her. "Your pick. Besides that, what type of sword would you like?”

Yukari clapped a hand over her mouth. “Oh my, I get to have a choice, not only one, but two? This surely must be the best part!”

That triggered an eye roll. "Yes. Well, if I had more details, then I could help you better…"

She rubbed her hands together, then clapped once. "I need something special for the targets of my prank. Open that purple door, please."

"I wonder who that is, then. A fine choice. Not that I know what’s inside."

The doors swung open, revealing a darkened room, rather small in size, but filled with all types of storage boxes and furniture. Musty air drifted from it, and Yukari wrinkled her nose as she entered. It wasn't dusty, though. A glint to the right caught her eye. Proceeding inward, she pried at the cabinet handle, finding a set of mounted katanas with black lacquered scabbards. Not it, and there was nothing worthy of notice within, either.

Yukari turned back, stepped out, and shook her head. "This room has nothing I want, by a second examination."

"Did you pick this room because it was purple?" Okina picked her book back up again.

She grinned. "Why, yes, I did.”

A chuckle and an amused direct look came from her. “As I expected. Would you like to visit every purple room, even if they would contain a very low chance of having what you seek?”

Yukari waved her hand. “Pfft, that is most certainly a waste of time. The amending of the criterion to a ‘legendary’ sword would be better.”

“That’s a step-up from special, isn’t it? And no, I can’t give you that particular sword, as I don’t have it in my possession. Unless you want my replica.”

“No thank you. I dislike imperfections.”

“I do give you my permission, you know. It’s not that complicated.”

“And as such, a tease of encouragement is warranted. Which side of the line do you prefer to show that you walk on?”

Okina pouted and rubbed at her eyes with a hand. “Ah, you and your ways of talking. I’ve done enough similar courtly-speak in those days. Is this a test?”

She patted her shoulder and giggled. “But it’s fun and clever! And I won’t mind any kind of answer. You’re hidden everywhere, after all. Even split four or more ways.”

“Well, please confine it to noh. I’m not as fond of beating around the bush nowadays… But I do think my answer will be predicated on what you choose. I don’t mind that, but please, at least make sure that it is relevant and sensible, if you are to be my biased messenger.”

“Aww, cranky Okina is cute. If it is to be a joint message, then it would be rude of me to take it entirely over and do whatever I desire. Unless you would want me to.”

“Yes, I know.” A blush and smile slowly spread across her face. “Heh, I don’t hear that often. You certainly disarm me easily… I was planning on finishing this book today, but I don’t mind your distraction.”

She waved her off again. “Oh, now is not the time to be lewd like that. Don’t forget my original reason for visiting.”

Okina sighed. “Fine, fine. But after?”

“I have a job to do. Multiple, in fact.”

“Disappointment.” Okina collected her cane leaning in its holder on the side of the couch. “I’ll have to have a look with you then. Be glad that I don’t need anything more than this right now.”

“I am!”

After rummaging through six more rooms, each with their own assortment of items stored away, Yukari held a plain-looking nodachi, smiling down at it. A cursed energy flowed through it, but it shouldn’t be too much for the target, especially with her powers. It would only cause… some minor complications alongside the main event. And it wouldn’t cast any suspicion on Okina, only herself, when it would be ripe to return to sender.

Okina barged back in through the door. “Oh, finally found it, have you? That was a weird sword I got some hundreds of years ago or something. I don’t remember the circumstances of how I got that… but there’s an ugly energy about it?”

Her eyes flickered toward her. “Yes, yes, indeed. I’m happy with this one! Fufu, you must be tired of me going through all your things.”

With a shrug, she said, “Eh, if it’s not outside of the room, then to me, it must not be very important until the moment it’s needed. Well, take it, as long as it satisfies you.”

“Thank you! I’ll put it to a very good use.” Opening up a gap, she placed it within a secure vault, and turned back to Okina with a flourish, kissing her lips briefly. “Now for the real story behind what I’ll be doing… you’ll find it a surprise. Let’s get out of this room first.”

Okina raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms, following after her. “Hopefully, it’s a good surprise.” The door closed behind her and disappeared, along with the rest.

After washing their hands, they sat down on the couch, the table in front prepared with tea and some blueberry pastries, judging by the color. She would always stay for these, as Okina usually insisted on making them herself, rather than relying on her servants, unless she didn’t feel like it or simply asked them to. Satono and Mai were lucky to have that, not to mention that Okina devoted a certain meticulous attention to the art. Meanwhile, her Ran was much better than her at that sort of thing, and there was the fact that she herself was far too lazy, though she would never admit it.

Taking a sip of her tea, Okina gestured at the sweets. “These are blueberry baklava. It’s a new recipe that I wanted to try. I hope you enjoy it.”

“Oh my, I’ve heard those take a long time to make.” She bit into one. The sheets of pastry slowly dissolved in her mouth, with the blueberries a contrasting sweetness, and the pecan nut spread complementing them smoothly, yet offering a rougher texture. “Would you mind if I ate them all?”

Okina laughed. “If you’re serious, yes, but I’ll need to take my portion of the fruits of my labor. And thank you.”

Yukari ate another and drank some of the tea. “Half so. So. Some of your old compatriots have entered Gensokyo. Can you guess who they are? Hint hint, an ancient war over religions.”

“That’s not helpful at all. My aspects have been involved in so many over the years. And ‘ancient’ is a shifting designation.”

“It does narrow it down a little. I’ll keep going for you.” She smirked and kissed her on the cheek. “Darling, it was a lot longer ago than the time you disappeared in any significance from the records. Past what you call your golden age as well, but before the names which comprise your current form came about, and after the one sealed away, or rather, that fled.”

Eyeing her and shaking her head, she said, “That reminds me of a wily snake with bared fangs. Hmm, I wonder how the Mishaguji are getting along with her? But, I need a few more hints, Yukari. That’s still a range of many hundreds of years, a thousand even.”

“That’s a topic for another time… and go meet her yourself. She’s probably missing you at least a bit. When you come back, that is. Well then, I’ll make it much easier, since it has to do with another who-would-be-named. Do you remember those sixty-six masks?”

“We’ll see…” she muttered. “Wha — of course I would! I was Hata no Kawakatsu! Why make it that easy then? Are you mocking me? Would this have to do with Umayado no Miko? This brings more questions, and I wonder, is he a god now?”

“Her. Oh, and it’s Toyosatomimi no Miko too now. And that’s half-correct.” It would require some patience for disclosing Hata no Kokoro.

Okina grinned. “Ah, like me! It was inevitable, considering how it was. I hope she doesn’t have too many regrets from back then. Continue.”

“...She is also a hermit, of the Taoist persuasion.”

Her mouth dropped open. “Huh? That doesn’t sound like the prince I know. Are you sure she isn’t an imposter?”

“Then you have been misled in that lifetime.”

Explaining it all took quite the while, but in the end, she received that approval. Yukari smirked as she recalled Okina’s laughter and the warm words in turn.

“Hah, bravo! I approve one hundred percent! A good choice to shake up Gensokyo, oh my.”

And as the sword floated on the palms of her hands, separated by a boundary to prevent its effects from transferring, she replaced the shaku with this one. Moving the actual sword would foil the plan immediately.

Now calling at: Divine Spirit Mausoleum, Human Village, Scarlet Devil Mansion, Forest of Magic, Hakurei Shrine, Hakugyokurou, Untrodden Valley, Moriya Shrine, and Heaven.

Next stop: Human Village.

Chapter Text

Sparkling lights, splendorous, rising out of the blanket of grey shadows, where only the barest hint of true darkness lay, as if the stars of the earth. Human-made, instead of the natural twinkles in the sky. The wind rushed past, steady and speedily, her hair trailing out from behind. Those rustles accompanied the powerful chugs and occasional squeaks as the wheels rolled on the rails, the pieces of romantic machinery they were. Gradually, the train blew its horns and slowed for its approach to the station.

No one could see her, for her arcane barriers prevented them from doing so. Carrying a parasol, and with her clothes as they were, if seen, she might be mistaken for a cosplayer. A thought that amused her, but disappointing, in that the modern world was drawn to such a mundane spectrum or equilibrium outside of special events. After all, such things were more accessible and accepted in these modern times than in the past.

She knew these lines like the back of her hand. Every nook and cranny of its timetables, an intricate system to be studied and understood, whether its counterparts from next-door, Tokyo, Shanghai, Seoul, Delhi, Moscow, London, or Paris, all the way around the world and back, and any notable unmentioned others. Freight as well, and down to the smallest of rail systems too. Interesting in how they could have some flexibility in case of incidents, yet permanent changes were slow and a massive undertaking.

An announcement rang out for the arrival at Jamaica, soon eclipsed by another to Far Rockaway, followed by a Ronkonkoma, and more. At the chime and whirr of the opening doors, people exchanged their places. Those bound for other destinations waited patiently, some slumping against the metal pillars lining the way. Except for the car horns blasting like a brass ensemble on the roads below, quiet mostly crept in at this time, in comparison to the bustle and chatter in the daylight, whether peak or off-peak. With the doors closed, the train slowly left, speeding up again as it headed for Penn Station. Buildings flew by, the bustle of the people below soon left behind.

She had been here since the days of horse-drawn carriages. Before the city turned into a concrete and steel monstrosity, glass overlaid to form a glittering veneer. Even then, it didn't feel like she belonged here. The very essence of this place rejected her in an irony, amongst its cavernous depths, however inviting they may be to delve into. Familiarity or not, it could be said that she had a soft spot for it there.

Ducking under a few bridges, which passed by quickly, she soon eyed the skyscrapers peering over the horizon, as the train approached. To a first-timer, they showed off an amazing grandeur, but for those accustomed, another late and boring night — for some, the start of work, or a desire to go home, or maybe something else. A pause to consider the engineering behind them might still light a spark in one’s eyes. Now, the yawning tunnel into the station signaled her own time to leave. With a deft manipulation of the gap underneath her, she changed to the top of a different train at a distant station instead, an artery of another system, but the main one that everyone knows.

One more ride for tonight.

Chapter Text

A new age of Gensokyo.

Beneath the shining lanterns, its residents gathered under the full moon at the Hakurei Shrine. Warm and inviting, the festive aura lit up every nook and cranny it could reach. Evidently, the surface. Her heart was lightened, pride swelling within it as well. The rules were a success. A safer push-and-pull rhythm in between the Hakurei Shrine and the youkai and any others, as Okina would put it. Rather than the youkai shrinking back from causing incidents in fear of Reimu, they could run about more freely. Even then, a conflict lay in between her desire for a peaceful Gensokyo, and its original purpose. Would the rules be enough?

Reimu sat on the shrine steps, sipping from a cup, with Marisa keeping her company. Fairies chased each other around, full of cheer and laughter, in contrast to the earlier times, where the shrine was gloomy and silent, and lifted only when Marisa and the occasional other human dropped by. Some of the more staid fairies sat on a blanket, sipping sake and enjoying the scene, while Suika laid on the ground, pouring sake from her gourd into a cup for Alice. In a flash, Aya dived in and snapped up a few scoops, as she always calls them. Seemingly satisfied, she settled down and challenged Komachi to a drinking contest. A delightful scene, this peace.

The history and memories it took to create this. Her thoughts wandered. In spite of it all, that grasping, twisting, dreadful yearning. In the midst of the excited chatter, the very small space she occupied, in contrast to her status. Yukari cast a glance over to the enthusiastic and veiled conversations that she could never enter, for they almost always dissipated upon her entrance. The fate of the most feared youkai, to accept such a thing. Condemned to watch from a distance, but a mighty effort to say it was her choice to do so. Surely, there were no interesting subjects to discover there, on account of her vast experience. No need to wound her pride like that!

“This shumai is exquisite. Aya brought it alongside her usual sake, and already some have been clamoring for her to bring it more often to events. Have you tried it yet?”

Yukari hid her face behind her fan. “Oh, Yuyuko, I have not yet. But you don’t need to save a few for me. Enjoy it to the fullest, for I am preferring a kind of dessert at this moment. There has not been a decision yet, but you may suggest one if you wish.”

“...I see. More for me then. Come to think of it, another sixty years have gone by quite fast.” She dipped another one into the soy sauce and ate it. “Youmu snuck off to investigate the flowers, but I let her.”

“It’s good for her to practice coming to her own conclusions, and to have a healthy sense of curiosity. Others are unwitting teachers, but worldliness is earned. The system is certainly more handy than what was before, but don’t you think the closest is what shapes them the most?”

“Hmm, but the day-by-day doesn’t change very much, except for the occasional incident. Is it not better to leave any lessons for when the time comes?”

Opening a gap, she reached through and stole the last skewer of dango from Reimu’s plate when she wasn’t looking, and ate the first ball off of it. The delectable chewiness and the taste of the sweet red beans filled her mouth. Ah, delicious. “...I suppose, if you are providing her with the means of reflection. But I heard she was careless with the nature of her sword until recently.”

Yuyuko nodded and sipped some more from her cup. “I thought that she would have known not to do that, but her training was incomplete, after all. In that case, since I knew about it, I should have told her.”

It was as if this conversation was a distraction, despite being valuable in itself. “Perhaps, see what similar instances there are, or the Yama… The Netherworld can be a little too carefree. We are all the more connected now, but there are considerations to be made.”

“Yes, yes. I told you there were going to be some growing pains, but they seem minor.” She smiled, leaned over, and kissed her briefly. “There’s no need to worry.” 

Skewering the last of the shumai, Yuyuko held it to her mouth, inviting her to have it. Yukari chuckled and accepted the last piece, leaving another empty plate. Some tasty hints of the mountain laid within it, especially the spring onions. Yuyuko stood and left the vicinity briefly, returning with another full flask of sake, gaze turned toward the blooming spring flowers of all kinds.

Meanwhile, with her thoughts turning away from the previous subject, Yukari pondered an alternate reality. The pathetic tug continued, drawing her farther away toward her own world that she scarcely shared. Yet, it had been a mere few months since she last saw her. The other, many moons ago. Where, what, why, how… Yukari cursed them for vanishing, how could they do that to her… and, too, her own reflection of reluctance. Why, to return to such a memory, rippling across time… Cease. Leave it behind.

So far away, and still the days march on. She looked at the space around her, bare except for Yuyuko. A place meant to enjoy what a new and normal spring has brought. Their forms, if they were here. Ghosts of an old memory. How ironic. Yukari reached over and laced her fingers through Yuyuko’s, squeezing her hand. Words failed her again. But she would understand. But it wasn't fair to heap it all on her… 

A tug on her sleeve. They fell into a gap she opened, landing softly at a private location in a secret grove of cherry blossoms on the border. Here was where common sense warped, and those seeking entrance or exit only went round and round in an endless sea of trees. Yuyuko regarded her silently, her eyes peeking over her fan, decorated with a red bridge and rustic willow leaves. She didn’t enjoy that look, Never did, and yet there was no escape from it. With a wink, Yukari forced a smile and brought her sake dish to her lips for a long sip, and another after to empty it completely. Simply to aid in feeling better, in anticipation of the upcoming unpleasantry.

The fan folded inward with a quiet snap, revealing her ethereal features. “Your eyes tell all, Yukari.”

She met hers hesitantly, which was unlike her. “It’s unfortunate, not to mention, foolish. I have you, Reimu, even if she plays up a dislike, and intermittently her…”

Yuyuko tilted her head and frowned. “Longing and a lack of connection, isn’t it?”

“It’s unlike you to spell it out.”

“It is important. Why wouldn’t I follow after you, then?” Yuyuko reached out for her hand, grasping it. “It might grow cold, but you have forgone your coat.”

It’s not like she made it a secret between them. But appreciative, it let her have a small sense of warmth. “So be it. Tell me what you have in mind, then.”

“A distance of your own making. Really, the only object limiting you is yourself.”

That was what she was already thinking while they were at the party. “Yes, I know that already.”

“And therefore, you are ensnared.” She poked her cheek. Not allowing her to get a word in, she continued. “It may be everyone’s creation. But, you are the one who loves it the most. Yet you keep meddling with it, not letting it be. Embrace it for now. ”

“Maintenance is work.” Yukari pouted. “It’s tiring. It’s Ran and I.”

“Ah, but make it more than that. You do live in it, so you are a part of it. After all, you weakened the border in between for the Netherworld for me, and now, we are all more connected. In addition, I administer it. Do see if there is something that can be left to me.”

“Yuyuko… it’s hard…” With that, she fell forward and embraced her, there with the comforting scent of cherry blossoms. Yukari laid her head on her shoulder. “I’m not worthy.”

And she sighed. “See, it does not do to watch you be unhappy for so long. As for these regrets, you must have heard of ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder.’ In a way, that is true as it arises in pain instead, but it isn’t fair to the ones still around you, to hurt them because of that. And I include myself there.”

“I suppose. How would I stop this then? It isn’t possible to bring them back, since they have their own reasons to move on. Everyone has their process from what is supposedly complete. It too, is necessary for everyone else to be suspicious of myself, to keep Gensokyo running smoothly. Why wouldn’t I fear it unraveling if they should cease to be?”

Yuyuko patted her back. “There, there. You have already taken one step forward with that spell card agreement and showing yourself to Reimu and the others.”

Swallowing her feelings that she hated to show so much, and her pride, she took a moment to think upon it. “That’s right… I’ve only been too scared to tread on that boundary much. Yet, Reimu isn’t one to be trifled with, and neither can I reveal myself to her like I can to you, even if I’ve known her since she was young. It’s a strange relationship by any standard.”

“She’s more than just a symbol of balance. Like Youmu. If you can have a good relationship with her, teaching her such-and-such, then why not Reimu?”

That was obvious, and yet, she hadn’t seen that. Yukari released her from the embrace, standing with her hands on her shoulders before lowering them. She smiled somberly and nodded. “Thank you for the advice. I’m sorry for the trouble I must have caused you. It doesn’t do anything to complain so much.”

Her folded fan was levelled at her. “No, no. Now, Yukari, I dislike that trait you seem to have picked up from Okina. Don’t sweep it up into a package and presuppose that it is done. You aren’t her. There is a time for discussion, for contemplation, and for action. And I’m happy to speak more when you are ready.”

Hearing that name framed in that context, her laugh rang out into the night air. “Well, I’m glad someone else noticed that. I’m not so glad that it appears that she has rubbed off on me in that way.”

Yuyuko kissed her on the cheek. “By the way, I’m feeling wolfish again. Shall we return?”

Yukari looked at her with admiration. “Fufufu, so we should. Let’s cause a new stir under this spring moon.”

Chapter Text

The tear in space stood out against all else within the vicinity, filled with disappointment. In spite of it, there was a duty to be performed, to rectify this transgression. One day, perhaps they would see the error of their beliefs, their failure to plan for what the future might bring, even if a current zenith of their influence brought a feeling of invincibility. Unfortunately, such change would remain to be seen, but all things must fall and crumble eventually, so how the saying goes.

Summoning her power over borders, Yukari examined the tear. One of the dissenting youkai had torn it apart, as evidenced by the last vestiges of magical energy infusing the trap and alarm she had laid. There were those who wanted nothing to do with her plan. That was fine, except for those who opposed it to the point of attacking it.

Why do so, when they could ignore it and it would effect no impact upon them? That, she could not understand. What shortsighted youkai. And they were youkai, supposed to be set apart from the pettiness of humans. Then again, who would believe that one’s power would fade, when the humans were barely fending them off now, each day a few and then some, picked off amongst the chaos of the warring among the human clans and their squabbles, supported by that idea of gekokujo. A perfectly valid one, if not for how much emphasis was placed on which clan allied to whom else and who would fight for what clan.

She started to mend the prototype barrier, meant to establish a harmless and loose outline of what was to be a balanced and neutral land, free of major conflicts and wanton destruction. She would name it Gensokyo, a literal meaning, when in the future, humans’ fear of the unknown weakened as the advance of technology marched on. The firearms that the Portuguese traded would only be the tip of the iceberg, and it was inevitable that such mechanisms and alternate explanations of phenomena would erode their sense of being, and in turn, cause regret.

Already, her plan was to create a “Barrier that divides Reality and Fantasy,” for those that have passed out of the reality in the mind of the humans and into imagination, believed to be mere legend. For youkai, gods, ghosts, spirits, animals, strange beings, all welcome. Though, she disliked needing to trap a village of humans within it as the base of the whole project and the place underpinning it all, not to mention, the requirement of obscuring the truth to them. Yet, it must be done, and so they would pass into fantasy peacefully too.

Yukari sensed the boundaries in front of her changing and glanced around with shifty eyes before turning back to find whoever dared disrupt her mending. On the back of the barrier and also the tree it was pegged to, a green door appeared, swinging open before her. An old man in orange robes and a black hat peered out of it, looking about as surprised as she did. Whether that was the case remained to be seen, as she couldn’t read him as well as she wanted to. How curious.

“Oh, what is this disturbance?”

While she recognized him as a famous god of the time, to refuse a proper greeting to her, well, she would refuse the same. “What is your business?”

He clasped his hands together. “What a rude youkai , I should have you hunted for that! When I see you next, you will regret it! Bow down before me, for I am Matarajin, god of the backdoor, obstacles, destiny, noh —”

Raising an eyebrow, she shook her head. “Yes, yes. All of the youkai in the land know about you, because of the tengu connection. You made the error first, so I will not be bowing down. There will be no bowing between us.”

“So flagrant! Ah… so I did. Apologies. I respect your boldness, youkai . May I ask your identity then?” Matarajin leaned out of the door to get a better look at her.

His words left a distaste in her mouth, and she suspected that any dealings with him would be more than burdensome, from this length of their meeting already. “No. That identity will not be granted to you, for my situation is delicate and you have offended me thus. That may be moot, should I know your ways, but in perpetuity, unless you become a proven ally, further knowledge is forbidden from you.”

“Very well. To get to the point, that rip in space has extended to my realm, and I wish to find the perpetrator. By keen deduction, I believe you are not them. Should we work together?”

Yukari opened her fan, holding it in front of her face. “A shared goal? How surprising; I was the one who made this barrier. What gave you the right to take this neutral tree into your realm? I made sure that it was free from other influences when I communed with the spirit living within.”

“That assumption isn’t the case… it seems that the perpetrator meant to strike us both. We are in the supposed back of this forest of trees, are we not? This is where some of the slivers of my realm are, and where my most well-known powers begin. You simply gave a material point to strike at. A bold offender indeed, but even I can find your tampering.”

“Then you weren’t watching your doorstep, I see. It was not supposed to be hidden.”

He laughed loudly. “Was that meant to be a joke? I wasn’t, and thus starts our hunt for them. Such amateurs, to have us both on their tail. They must be trembling now!”

“That may be interpreted as you desire, and I haven’t agreed to it yet. Don’t be hasty, as I still don’t trust you.” Yukari’s lips curled behind her fan. She didn’t enjoy the boisterous personality of this god, and would rather be back home, plotting her next move. Still, he could mean a very influential ally indeed, despite being stuck here entertaining him.

“Yes, there is no need to rush. Even if they are watching us, any statement we make does not indicate anything. Our meeting is an act of intimidation by itself, hah. Whether separate or not, there is only one result. May I ask what that barrier is for?”

“You tell on yourself. But it is for a youkai project that many are for and against.”

“A door transmits through boundaries, after all. I know your name, not this project.” Matarajin leapt out of the door and landed on his feet, holding a drum. “Well, this is my form. Not too frightening, am I?”

She scoffed at the last sentence as she lowered her fan and returned it to a folded position. As if this bumbling god could be frightening to her… but appearances would deceive. The multitudes of powers commanded, especially that of the mental type, could make negotiations difficult. None were attempted yet, which indicated a mutual understanding. 

“Good. Then we are on an open playing field, god. I look forward to this partnership.”

He smiled, almost resembling an inquiry in itself. “Why accept so readily?”

“I sensed no use of your mental powers. While I have my defenses and misgivings, your words seem straightforward enough. And you may be of use to me yet.”

“Heh, as you are too to me.” So, he had the same purpose in mind for the future. “Should we consider this an open offer between us?”

“Your realm is suspicious. In mine, I shall be able to keep an eye on you.” Yukari opened a gap, showing off the ominous eyes within. “Open as long as we feel no deception on either part.”

“Keep your enemies close, and your friends closer, right? Thank you for the invitation.”

“I’m no friend of yours.”

Chapter Text

Seawater gently flowed onto the shore, lapping at the washed-up driftwood. Squawking seagulls, flying high above, circled the boardwalk twisting along the edge. The clouds cast a grey shroud over the area, shading the sun, as the cool air blew her hair to the side, to her annoyance. She brushed it back into place with her free hand. Ah, no godly matters and strawberry ice cream made for a good day off. Especially idly spending time here, though she would go wherever her whims would take her. Okina ate some of her ice cream, the tasty sweetness chilling her mouth. The first glimmers of the sun reached above the clouds, piercing through as they drifted away.

Footsteps approached, and a shadow fell over her.

“I didn't know you liked the beach.”

“Not really.”

“Forgive me, but perhaps you should move from here.”

“What if I don’t want to?”

“Then I must call you petulant.”

“Isn’t that describing yourself right now?”

“Isn’t that describing you?”

Okina glanced upward at her light blue parasol, and over to her matching dress in all of her glory, light and lacy. “Call or be called, can’t you stand for a bit? I can’t stand.”

Yukari pouted and flexed a leg. “It was a long walk to get here. Take pity on a tired soul.”

“Look, I’d offer my lap, but my legs are weak. Plus, that was your choice too.”

“I’ll ask why you decided to come such a long way.”

“No reason. I can come up with one. Getting away from the other beachgoers and their noise. It’s not that much either, you’re just out of shape. Not that I can say anything different for myself.”

She smiled. “All in all, I can stand. Such a neutral opinion. They say that the ocean air helps to promote health, after all. A walk should double it.”

“Mine? Nah, it can’t do anything about it.” Okina licked at what remained of the ice cream, which, by now, was only the cone and the amount contained within it. “It could be nice if the world worked on a hitpoint system.”

“Possibly. Though that would reduce probabilities and render them into certainties. I envision the humans working out the limits of such a system.” Yukari continued on about the mathematical implications and how she would figure such a change would affect their society, and dived into the esoterica, complete with its approximations.

Her understanding was limited to a small amount of the explanations, besides what was directly related to the game-related topic of hitpoints. Turning her gaze to her, she admired her passionate ideas and her beauty. “Babe, I have no idea what you’re talking about, but I enjoy hearing about it anyway. But I agree that everything related to health would be rendered into such-and-such terms.”

“Yes, yes. Look at you, calling me that. You should call me that more often.” 

That explanation was seemingly for her self-satisfaction, but she didn’t mind. Yukari didn’t have much opportunity to express herself in that way, after all, outside of her shikigami. “Only when I feel like it.”

“It’s a shiny compliment then.”

She started on the crunchy cone. “I’ve always had the impression that it was an overly simple game, outside of any self-imposed rules.”

“It is. But cute things are to be treasured. Like you.”

Okina scoffed. “Heh, I’m not cute. Would you like to go somewhere? You’ve never been a type that enjoys this kind of place either.”

“Some foresight you have. Let me enjoy the breeze here a little more.” Her parasol folded up, and she hung it on the handlebars of her wheelchair. “Would you like to go drinking today?”

“I’ll have to decline. My mental energy is weaker today too.” Even with that, she didn’t feel like it either. “I was going to go home soon. Come back with me.”

Ran stepped out of a gap and bowed before them. “Hello Lady Yukari, hello Master Okina. My apologies for the disruption. I am bringing some news that would require attention. Some new youkai outsiders have entered Gensokyo. I am keeping watch over them.”

Yukari nodded. “Do the usual protocol.”

“Very well. I will return then.”

After Ran left, she sighed. “The new spellcard system is stirring up a sensation. It’s starting to be hard to judge precisely what effect each group will have on Gensokyo’s ecosystem… And here I am, desperate to show you its latest development.”

Knowing that she could end her self-exile was tantalizing. But no. Not until she’d found what she’d been looking for. “You’ve told me about how much a spectacle it is. I can believe its effect, rippling across the youkai world. Come on, let me fantasize. Isn’t that the point?”

She grabbed her wrist and held it tightly. “Another of my achievements…”

Okina looked down at her hand, and back to her, and steeled her heart. “I know.”

“By the way, I finally showed myself to Reimu!”

It was rare to see her so excited. “How was it?”

Yukari giggled to herself, letting go of her wrist. “It was a little back and forth, but nothing too antagonistic! She roused me from my slumber!”

“Well, are you keeping a secret?” She was torn between an interest in hearing more about this Reimu, and not, given that Yukari had been speaking about her for a few years now. The new generation’s Hakurei shrine maiden…

“A sort. You see, I ripped open the barrier between the Netherworld and Gensokyo. I thought it wouldn’t do to have Yuyuko and all of the phantoms cooped up in there anymore, against the recommendation of the Yama that time. But a youkai’s mischief!”

Okina tilted her head. “Liar. You would’ve done it a long time before, and there was no recommendation. It must have been for another reason.”

“I’m glad you remember. We stole spring together. Unfortunately, I am angry at Yuyuko. Her wit was greater than mine, but fortunately, Reimu was able to resolve her incident. The Saigyou Ayakashi lies dormant once more.”

“You don’t seem angry all that much.”

“Oh, I am boiling mad inside… Merely relieved that Reimu could hold her own. She even got through the trial of my spellcards!”

Regret colored her voice. “That’s good. I imagine you put up a tough challenge, as befitting of the youkai of boundaries.” Her reply was bland… and that regret was from not understanding fully. But she was happy for her.

She pulled out a few slips of paper from a gap. “These are a few of the spellcards I made. Barrier ‘Balance of Motion and Stillness,’ Evil Spirits ‘Yukari Yakumo’s Spiriting Away,’ and Sinister Spirits ‘Double Black Death Butterfly.’ A pity that Ran could not be too creative with hers. I’ll have to see about her designs, but she insists on copying. I do enjoy her names, I must say.”

“All about the borders and your role in Gensokyo.” Wistfulness welled up from within as she pointed at the last card. “That name is clearly an inspiration from Yuyuko.”

“Yes, to our shared meeting that she no longer remembers much of. You should go see her, you know. She’s told me that you haven’t visited for a few months or so.”

“I’ll make it some time.” Okina chuckled humorlessly. “I miss her too. But don’t reference me in any spellcards. I want my anonymity… As for my spellcards, hmm…”

“You have much to pull from, after all. I could help, but it is a journey for oneself too. A prime philosophy behind it.”

“I’ll dream about it.”

“Tell me about those dreams, then. How have you fared in the Outside World? Will you think about coming back soon?”

“You’ve intrigued me.” Okina paused for a moment to think. “But I’ll always have one foot in the Outside World, and another in Gensokyo. You, you’ll always have one foot in Gensokyo, and another in the Outside World.”

“So you say… is that true?” A glimmer of sadness flashed across her face.

“I’m not sure.” The conversation was only growing more difficult.

“That's simply like you, always doing your own thing… Even if you leave Gensokyo, Gensokyo never leaves you.”

A sigh came from her. “That sounds like a warning. But I don’t believe in chasing regrets. If you feel that way in such a deep-seated manner, it’s impossible to change it. You’ll find your way, and I’ll find mine. Still, I do feel some part of that is true.”

“I see. I’ll wish for a calm night. A good night.”

“Thinking back to those years ago, I’m sorry for how I sprung it on you like that.”

“You have caused me much pain, and yet I still insist on staying by your side. Such-and-such changes. I understand that much.” She leaned forward and kissed her. “Don’t look back, darling.”

“Yes… Change… what a wildcard.” Okina had drifted into a contemplative mood. “Good, bad, one has to take it as a complete package of the zeitgeist. Nostalgia doesn’t create anything by itself, one has to make an effort to create a new feeling and memory.”

“Everyone wants it. It’s a mental trap…”

“And an opportunity.”

Yukari laughed. “I do love it when you finish my sentences for me. But it is a lesson for myself as well. Too often have I floated into a wish for the past to return, and worked toward that end.”

“That’s your problem, except I doubted you too, until they touched my senses. You’ve predicted what has come to pass. My optimism was tempered, and I’m very tired, but I’ve gained a lot of knowledge.”

“Oh no, it’s not simply that, however, you were right. Resistance and reflection have made their mark. I suppose it started when that vampire I told you about began their first incident.”

“Why is that?” Okina shifted on the couch.

“She’s from a foreign land. In fact, she reminded me a little of you, now that I think about it. Don’t laugh when you meet her, though you will be sorely tempted to. Her appearance marked a breaking point in the peace, but it was for good. The question was, what would the course of Gensokyo come to?”

“Ah, the catalyst for your spellcard system. As the world outside is beginning to constrict in its freedoms, measures have to be taken to preserve Gensokyo’s.”

“Correctamundo. The situation was deteriorating, and it had been peaceful for too long. Every youkai feared the shrine maiden to the point they were not willing to cause trouble, and some had begun to disappear. The vampire roused a rebellion among them, that I had a hand in stopping. It was easy to concoct some terms, and plant the idea for the system in some lesser youkais’ minds, which they would bring to Reimu.”

“From my perspective, you are taking the reins and shaping what you want for Gensokyo now. That’s your true vision, and I’m proud to see how far it’s come.” Okina reached forward and patted her shoulder. “It’s part of the reason why I left.”

Yukari sniffed and crossed her legs. “That isn’t the entire story, is it? Even then, your voice is not missing from Gensokyo, because it is woven into its very fabric. I made up my mind about my point of view one day, for the purpose of consoling myself. Would you like to hear it?”

Unsure what to expect, she said, “Go ahead.”

“...It would make sense that you would want to return to the world that gave a name to you. At the time, I was blinded and could not see why, because all I knew was the negativity, besides the fleeting joys, from the systems gone too far and corrupt. Too much trouble for the sake of it, while Gensokyo tries to navigate its place among the ocean of the world. Otherwise, it was another golden age of events that pertained to your domains. A pinnacle. That much should have been obvious to me. But that is history now. To create, a compromise has to be reached. That is the essence of the spellcard system.”

“It’s back and forth to Gensokyo.” Laughing, she shook her head. “Haha, you truly love it more than me. But I do see. There’s been a fair share of developments that I’ve disliked, but it might be more of taking the good with the bad. I still haven’t found what I’ve been looking for.”

“And what that might be?”

“No idea. But even if a god such as myself, or anyone, does not know what they are looking for, then there are two choices for the trial: to persist and to refuse. There is no predictable outcome, and it is impossible to know what is superior and what is inferior. In that, what would any being be if they did not have faith in themselves? They would disappear.”

Her finger reached out to touch her face. “Maybe you found an unknown gestalt. Maybe you found a philosophy. Maybe you found nothing, and maybe that is good or bad. Between us, we see the world differently, so what you see is yours. So then, only by communication, there is a chance of closure. Keep wandering in search of your completeness.”

“I’ve spent all of this time, hoping not to get caught up in that fallacy.” Okina leaned back and rubbed her face, and breathed in and let it out, feeling a sense of worry, soon replaced by a calm. “Now what? At the least, your encouragement is a relief. You’ve strengthened my resolve.”

“It may be as simple as something you have overlooked.”

She opened her mouth and closed it, thinking for a few moments. “Yes.”

“A reminder. An assumption that you have already thought such. That is all I have the ability to do, an unknowing guidance. One wish, perhaps, is that what you may discover will be large and strong in clarity, in the direction towards good.”

“That’s still helpful…” It would be worth another examination over the circumstances that led her here. “We’ll see. The spellcard system is already strong, if everyone is using it now.”

“Forgive me for this attachment… It’s not ours. Yet, this was powerful.”

“Indeed not. That’s you, Reimu, and Remilia’s accomplishment to claim. Not mine, not Kasen’s, not anyone else’s. You both forged it, and strove to do something better than the status quo, even if you're both the keepers of something close to it. Well, there’s the question of whether there is another aspect of a better one you can create, and whether there are those who seek to dismantle it, like the barrier when it was first erected. We both know that it's a precarious position, and yet you took on that responsibility.”

Yukari nodded. “I'll do whatever it takes to maintain Gensokyo. This new Gensokyo can only exist through great effort. It will be my gift to you, when you choose to come back.”

“Expect something of equal impact in return. I look forward to it.”

Chapter Text

The chill that creeps through the air, that seeps through walls, and pools in the mind. It breathes through an elephant’s trunk, and pounces with the fury of a snake. Unpleasant at the least, grips in the most. A sharpness that reverberates through several hells. At the heart of it all, beyond the fallen leaves and the barest whisper of snowflakes. Turn the page, and it resembles harshness, a mortal truth, or that of crystal essence, reflecting the other side. Mirrors burrow themselves in without will. It becomes a balance of stillness and motion without thought, or simply for one to hurry home and warm themselves up. 

Winter… Every time it came to pass, the heaviness of sleep, of hibernation came too. Gathering and conserving energy for the rest of the year. And she could feel it now, as she tapped her pen and set it down. Spell cards required a certain focus, though their nature was to be disposable. It was important to take pride in one’s work for their own satisfaction. Screwing the inkpot lid back on, Yukari left the set to dry, and at the same time, glanced over at her room, which contained her bed and her pillow. She didn’t hibernate in the way that an animal fully would, but it was a long period of staying in and doing much less, and sleeping a lot, obviously. She wasn’t the type to get out much already either, except for when the mood arose for some show-making or pranking. Certainly not in these times. But besides that, this too, was a test of the Barrier’s mechanisms, its self-maintenance.

After all, she had worked so hard up until now. Yukari pushed open the door, took a portion of the covers off, and rolled onto the softness, pulling them over herself. It would take but a few minutes for the wondrous warmth to spread. She rested there, closing her eyes for an unknown length of time before opening them and looking at the darkness casted from the comforter above. But it wouldn’t do to sleep yet. Slow breathing, the enveloping fabrics, and the quasi-heaviness of them. The silence in the room, occasionally interrupted by Chen’s shouting about something with Ran. Goodness, she should reprimand her about the noise sometime, but she wouldn’t dare discourage her excitement. She could live with it… for now. Summoning up some energy, Yukari was going to change the qualitative borders of the room to return the silence. Stillness, in a world where that was a treasure.

But the door endured some knocks, casting off her plan. It must be Ran, bearing some news or a guest. 

Annoyed at the disturbance, she sat up, opened a gap, and opened the door, finding Ran as she thought. “Yes?”

“Good afternoon, Lady Yukari. Lady Yuyuko has arrived, and is awaiting your —”

Yuyuko appeared behind her and walked in. “Ah, thank you Ran, but no need for such formality. I’m just visiting before the winter takes her, and I’ve drank enough tea for today. Say, Yukari, you look quite warm.”

“Indeed, I thought that I would have a short nap in comparison. Otherwise, a few days may pass first… Ran, return to whatever you were doing before.”

“Very well. Please call for me if I am required.” Ran bowed and left.

Yukari fought the urge to not get up, and began rolling out of bed. “Isn’t this unseemly.”

Yuyuko laid a hand on her arm. “Stay, if you are so inclined. Lie-ins aren’t so bad.”

“Oh, I’ll make room.” She moved a little, and unfortunately, her side became half-warm and half-cold. But it would be a commitment for lovely Yuyuko.

“Mmm…It smells like you.” Sitting on the bed, she soon laid down beside her, and returned her to the previous state of comfort, only made better, albeit, a little cooler, by her presence. 

Nothing that her own heat couldn’t win against. Temperature check. 24.6 degrees Celsius. “Of course it does.”

“It’s funny, you know, we were like this ten years ago, and again, many times, years ago.”

“Yes, it’s funny how you can remember that but not what you did this morning. Neither can I for myself, for that matter.”

“Important things remain, and all else goes to the wayside. Isn’t that what you would say?”

“Well, it would be a disservice to Ran if I couldn’t remember this morning’s breakfast. Or is it the opposite?”

“Things happen like that.”

“Like what?”

“Transience…”

“How could I forget? But ten years is a long time in human years, and but a blink in our years. I wonder how Reimu is getting on now with that knowledge? I can say that it’s never a waste to reminisce.”

“Reimu’s all grown up now. I remember when you showed me a glimpse of the Spell Card Rules. Ah, it’s still amusing to watch you fuss over her. Your touch hasn’t relaxed. I suppose it’s the same with Youmu, running all about Gensokyo when an incident arrives. And I was visited when I was a person of interest twice. Even I was perplexed when such a number of spirits arose, but it was only a matter of time.”

“Never mind them, they’re getting along well enough.” Yukari laced her fingers with hers. “We never imagined what a strange course it would be. If you have a nose for those, then it’s surprisingly easy to return to it.”

“There are some that prefer to live in the present, you know. Hmm, maybe I should possess you.” Yuyuko reached over and poked her cheek to no particular reaction. “Doki, doki.”

“I would return you to your own body if you tried that.”

“Oh, I’m disappointed that there’s a barrier already. Then again, vampires have the taste of the old world, don’t they?”

“They always do, in the same place that ghosts do. Except ghosts eat.”

“Stop making fun of me.”

“That certainly is your imagination.” Her thoughts flitted to the recent incident, with the oil. A nasty thick fluid coming from below onto the surface. She wondered why she would think of that… It would be better to move onto nicer pastures. Consciously ignoring that, Yukari embraced Yuyuko tightly, snuggling into her chest. “You are so cute!”

Yuyuko simply placed her hand on her back and rubbed it as they rested there. “Sweet of you to say…”

She could only giggle. “And it’s safer with you here. Very much so.”

“Oh really? Are you running from something?”

“The usual.”

“Am I to be used like that whenever you are bored?”

“You came here first and decided to lay with me, so I must ask that of you. But you are correct in the most incorrect of ways.”

“I didn’t know that there was a singular purpose to boredom.”

“The purpose is nil.”

“Zero is wonderful, isn’t it? Between your one and that which I have gleaned from what you say.”

“Let’s make it two, to see if she’s listening. But in such terms that you have used, it would be zero, and I am simply talking to myself.”

Yuyuko laughed, and they paused to listen. Nothing happened until there was a clatter and crash onto the floor from the rest of the house, combined with Chen’s frantic yelling. What were they up to? Well, she might not pay much attention to Chen’s antics, but she should remind Ran to keep a better hold on her, especially with water. She probably didn’t do anything too bad, even considering her variety of fickle and unreliable cat youkai. Yet, that was just how cats were, and she could find some adoration and amusement in that. Her valuables were locked away to begin with, with the exception of the impermeable ones. Imperishable, rather.

“How auspicious,” Yuyuko said.

“It’s quiet again.”

She didn’t reply. Making her release her grip, Yukari got up a bit, propped a few pillows up, and laid on them, with Yuyuko shifting to lay her head on her stomach. Another hour, or what seemed like it, passed. Maybe more. Perhaps her sense of time was eroded by the waves of past time. With a shiver, the idea was thrown out. Leading down that path was a dark thicket, and the present was the present. Why stray? Especially with it this close to hibernation season, and the allure of the other darkness was holding its sway over her body. If she was to choose, then she would rather the path that led to neither. There was always a lot to do over the winter… Alas, what must be, must be.

The door opened, disturbing the tranquility to a slight shock, and Okina Matara strolled in.

“Hello, hello,” she said. “Am I due to leave already?”

“Hello Okina,” Yuyuko said.

Placing a hand on her heart, Yukari smiled. “So nice of you to join. By the way, that earlier, was that you?”

“What are you talking about?” She closed the door behind her and walked up to the bed.

“It’s not important. Care to lie down with us?”

“Seems like it would be cramped, but very well.” Okina settled in next to Yuyuko, adding more warmth to the equation. Balancing it all out, like she should be.

“Oh my, now I’m in the middle,” Yuyuko said. “This feels special.”

“Ah, now I’m not the special one anymore?”

“I’ve snatched away your status.”

“And I could easily change it by moving around. Ohoho, I have all of the power.”

“Are we playing go?” Yukari asked.

Okina laid her head on Yuyuko’s shoulder, blonde hair falling over her chest. “That’s too much effort. In fact, being powerful is too much effort. I’m too much effort.”

Yes, that last part could be true, sometimes. “Have you come around to the philosophy of the lazy?”

“If I may offer a little advice, then it is that letting go of things that are out of your hands is paramount.”

“I didn’t come to complain. That would be inconsiderate, especially to Yukari.”

“It’s not as if we’re preparing a funeral,” Yuyuko said. “Speak freely.”

“Do you have my death on your mind?”

Okina laughed. “I know! Hibernating seems equivalent to dying for a few months.”

“Excuse me, I’m alive in my dreams too. I have no wish to become deceased.”

“Why not a ghost? I can tell you all of the hidden benefits and such and such. All it will take is one word.”

Yukari looked down at her, and pressed a finger to her lips. “Dead people tell no tales.”

“Haha, that was sharp. What sort of dreams do you usually have?”

With the length of time she spent sleeping, there were all sorts of scenarios. But she never remembered too many. “Let’s see… There was that time I was gracefully galvanting in the sea, swimming with all manner of sea life. And that time where I arrived in a devastated wasteland, and factions of strange men with firearms controlled it all. Or something as simple as being in a restaurant. Ah, I was about to order something tasty, but I woke up then.”

“Sounds normal,” Okina said.

“Did you expect it to be different? I have dreams about Gensokyo too. In fact, Gensokyo itself is already a dream.”

“I know.”

Yuyuko chuckled. “How fun, my dreams are mainly about food.”

A sigh came from Yukari. With how much her mind was set on it, she could see how they would turn out. What she would be interested in were the ones not about it. “Be quiet, don’t make me hungry before hibernation.”

“You didn’t have a pre-hibernation meal?”

“That was a few hours ago.”

Placing her hand on Yuyuko’s, Okina changed the topic. “Come to think of it, Yuyuko and I don’t need to sleep, so I wonder why it’s a common habit. Excepting you, Yukari.”

“A former human’s habit,” Yuyuko said, gripping hers in turn.

“It is a sensible division of day and night,” Yukari said.

“I mean, I’ve stayed up plenty of times. And I wake Satono and Mai up for practice in the mornings. But yes, it’s harder to distinguish if one week is continuous.”

“I see we’ve found the dragon dish. That said, as much as I would like to continue lying here, isn’t the time to leave? Yukari?”

She smiled, a peaceful one. In fact, she wouldn’t mind delaying her hibernation even more, but at this point… “Go if you may. Or indulge.”

Some more time had passed.

Kissing Yukari, Yuyuko held her close, and did indeed indulge, finally letting go. “It’s always so amusing when we don’t want to leave.”

“True, it’s been long enough. Don’t let me keep you from your sleep.” Okina stood up, opening a backdoor on the back of the bedroom door. “Before that…” She leaned down, her hand tilting Yukari’s chin up, and their lips met.

“It’s so lovely to be kissed by both of you,” she said once they separated, resigned to the long sleep, yet yearning for a little more already. Possibly even some regret, despite vowing to have gotten over missing out on events. “It comforts me most.”

“We’ll savor it until the next,” Yuyuko said, getting up after Okina.

“Let’s look forward to spring then, and when we can be like this again.” With a gesture towards the door, Okina asked, “Hey, Yuyuko, would you like to come over?”

She soon stood by her side, and took hold of her arm. “Of course.”

Yukari wondered what they would get up to, but soon hid under the covers again and closed her eyes.

Chapter Text

If destiny continually changes, then it is both static and dynamic. One decision may indirectly or directly lead to another, and that drives the path by which we all live, whichever form we take. Some believe that it is predetermined; others, not so much. People may live unfulfilled, and people may die unfulfilled, and vice versa. People always focus on the negatives, so that we follow them too. A blessing, curse, and function of bearing the task of the measurement of lifespans, and too, that oversees destiny. It may be asked, does such a task cause indifference?

Judgment is heavy. To empty out the contents of a life, and examine them in detail, and yet for all to only focus on the sins and merits. From birth to death, we share in the highest and lowest, the joys and despairs, the firsts of all, and the connections made, whether the most fleeting, or the most in-depth. A spotlight, drifting apart, the tension between two desires, the happy tears. 

On the other side, the cruelest moments, whether a heart breaking in unrequited love, or a murder tearing a family apart, in the pursuit to leave no stone unturned. The very stuff that stories are made out of, hidden within each microcosm. And they say one can find their destiny written in the stars. What does it mean to have destiny be predetermined? That one is a paper doll, blown forward or backward by the winds of change? Sounds like a rather powerless way to live, contradictory to judgment too. Real power is the belief to effect change by their own hand. To improve rather than to stagnate, no matter the circumstances that a person may discover themselves in. Then again, is it better to wish upon a star, to have one’s head in the clouds, or to gaze at the wall, finding nothing?

Such statements, or rather, vague philosophies, are ideals. But they are, by that very virtue, able to be adaptable. The multitude of religions stem from these, although separate in the end. What else are their teachings for, if taken one by one? They prescribe in their way as a whole. What is a should, what is a could, and what is a not. It can be a tautology or a self-fulfilling prophecy. A journey for meaning, to live well, for comfort, for belief for the sake of belief, or a search for something. If the future can be divined, then isn’t that one possible outcome?

But ideals are just that. Mundane but powerful problems, like lack of money, debt, reputation, medical problems, changing beliefs, among others, make them seem impossible to achieve. Even as a god overseeing these concepts, their depths may be unknown to me. But my past forms have suffered, and in a paradox, I watch others suffer, and rely on them as faith, despite my wish to remove their suffering from such ailments. But there will always be an “other” in this world, unfortunately.

It’s difficult to watch. That much is true. They used to gather at the back of the enshrined and the temples, and some still do. But vulnerable as it is to pour one’s feelings out, sometimes that is what is needed, and for many, they do not have even that. The world looks upon them as lame, diseased, disabled, undeserving, and eyes dart past without consideration, or with contempt. Even the ones labeled as invisible, and those truly invisible in their eyes. Some may prefer that way, to be regarded as without. To that, why shouldn’t they be able to be considered on the same level, in an abstract sense?

The world at large doesn’t know what to do with them, beyond any assistance for the tools they use. Praise for those that have compassion, but unfortunately, even then, they may find that they have no idea for they do not understand. A war with the shoulds and the coulds. But if they find a way to listen, that is something to be commended. And there are those who presume to advocate, but end up contrary to the wishes said, defeating the point.

Some are caught in between systems. Others, by fear of judgment, stay locked in by their own will. Still, those with similar disabilities to my own may be gawked at, isolated away from the rest, and given no recourse for accessibility. Yes, there are things that logically, we cannot do or should not do, and these are reasonable responsibilities. What is necessary to ensure a baseline of health is what should be done. Yet, the wheels of government lay unturning, for no true thought is given to them, occupied by greater and lesser issues and pure noise. But this is merely a generalization, as the variety of ailments number in the multitudes, and with the exception of the most common, many will not find or know of them until they experience one themselves, or someone, as a curiosity.

Slowly, it will get better. A good thing that comes about from progress, placing the voice of the self in the front and center. But the rest of it, is it a good thing? By that admission, more noise comes to the forefront, and everyone has their own opinions nowadays, amplified beyond what most humans can handle. That many voices, that many beings… sounds familiar, doesn’t it? It gets difficult to distinguish that from reality. Ah, but it’s simply a musing. One about that where most will never tread, and most would hope to never to.

But for us that are here, and this is merely one opinion, this is a feature of us. Give credence to those working to improve our position, as we are still here. We are present, as your friend, your family, your neighbor, your doctor, and as a stranger. But we need no special recognition unless required, leave it as a quiet reminder. We should have pride in ourselves, for existing as we are, even with all of the difficulties that life offers. Beyond that, we have strength, even in the ways of the mundane. The fact that we can overcome these limitations shows that. It may even be part of our identity. By what judgment should we consider a condition a disability? According to one’s ability, there are many ways to accomplish a desired result. Why not ask the one affected what they think they need and what they should do?

But it should also be acknowledged that even in these difficulties and limitations, we often need help, leaning on the support of others, and do not exist as some sort of caricature or figurehead. These are real problems, and they can be debilitating, such as on the days that I need prosthetics, or have major pain. For that pride is merely an ideal, and for the regular days on the ground, they are disregarded in favor of soothing the discomfort at hand. On occasional days, these cannot be seen, and it seems as if I have no such impediments. But, that doesn’t stop me from doing as accorded to my current condition, as far as it allows me. That is my way. It is not someone else’s way, and what works for one, may not for another.

Besides that, the negative aspects, including the fear of and that of real stigma, compels one to find possibly self-destructive ways to deal with it, for a lack of a better phrase. Addicts find their place here as well. It can leave a person feeling bitter and broken, or in denial, but that illusion may need to be shattered gently. Infringing on others—whereby one may harm or steal, in order to even poorly maintain their condition, out of necessity. A duo of difficult topics, where that may be linked within the possible nature of disability, but may not be included under it, as wavering, unclear lines. And that too, where it may be derived from said conditions.

Even a god such as myself is susceptible to these, that is why I count myself among them, rather than above them. It may be seen differently, however. Why would we want a god to continually hold a close presence over us, even if it may be comforting to think that way?

Why, we can still dream too, right?

Chapter Text

It’s not everyday that you wake up with a certain name on your mind.

Okina yawned and pondered that thought as that very name held its place, and the memories of one of her old identities emerged from the murky past to the forefront of it all. Umayado no Miko and Hata no Kawakatsu. A tinge of bitter melancholy settled over her. It often wasn’t possible to let go of such things if they had been so definitive in that aspect’s life, especially with unfinished commitments and lingering thoughts to share. To part ways like that… then again, in those days, humans had to reckon with their mortality earlier.

The temple still stood in Kyoto, as a circular curious phenomenon to herself as a source of faith. But even after a thousand and a few hundred years, its association was one that she would prefer not think about. To her, it was that aspect’s memory, and there it should belong, not to herself overall. It did not change any of the facts behind it, so rather than completely ignore them, she would acknowledge them as such.

Between the uprisings, the reforms, and all of the politics before, it really was so far away from these times, that it seemed hard to believe that they happened. But they did, and only existed as nostalgic, treasured things brought out in reflective moments. If she thought too hard about them, then those multitudes of regrets, what ifs, and other evil spirit-types would linger too long, and to dive past, one would be required to accept history as it is, immutable but appreciated for the long road traveled to the present.

Clans vying for influence, the mixtures of beliefs inside of religion, the petty arguments over those, flower-viewing under the afternoon sun with sake, whispers under the boughs of a tree, communications between lovers, a scout providing information, clandestine poems written, a silent dance upon a stage, helping to plan out political moves… The more things change, the more they stay the same. The forms are different, but the ideas remain.

There was no desire to return, though. For all of the advancements to the modern period, it was indeed superior in terms of the availability of goods and services, made possible by technology and widespread knowledge, bridging into new horizons. Could that be said for the same of spirituality? No, and as faith was caught in a redirection, those that could claim and control information would control faith. What had once been novel became banal, and whether they were more mediocre concepts or not, others took their place. Some good, some in the middle, some bad… it depended on the eye of the beholder.

Looking at places that once existed in the Outside World… where there was once a market, now an empty field, where a tranquil lake once was, filled in and now railroad tracks, a vital artery of a different kind. A glowing metropolis, a new ecosystem, yet fit only for a few species. Wolves, treading this land for thousands of years, disappeared entirely. But one could say that it’s natural, isn’t it? After all, ancient fish from a million years past can only be found in the Sanzu and other similar rivers, pine trees create acidic ground, and animals shape their own version of the land through their behavior.

Out of that thread, plenty of negatives, even more that would only lead down a rabbit-hole, and useless to ruminate on. But one cannot just lay down and die, complacency is the worst. The world has changed, but from any perspective, doing anything to solve a problem, enrich it somehow, or even just doing what you want, with no harm to anyone, no matter how small, should be commended! It has meaning and intent!

Okina sighed, turning on her side to glance at the time. Still early in the morning, not quite the time to get up and cook yet. Very well, she would just lie in… like she wanted to anyway. But… she understood the allure of the metropolis. It wasn’t like there weren’t cities in the hundreds and thousands of years before. What else could one want when that density brought ideas, an easier sense of commonality, more resources and opportunities, and more interesting things just around the corner?

Yet, for anyone with self-awareness, it’s a sobering experience. With so many people, the pace of the place speeds up, and one realizes that they aren’t special, another one to be lost in the sea of faces, or rather a faceless sea, depending on how it is thought about. It can be freeing, since it’s possible that someone would want that. A double-edged sword. But a person can find time and care for others even then, empathy through lived experience or knowledge, and to take life at their own pace. And such a difference is what makes it so captivating, a gap mōe… Her thought briefly turned to Yukari from the mention of a gap.

Yukari cared not for the cities, except for their trains. She would rather see them all torn down or to have nature reclaim it, and a harmony with nature recreated in its place. Her relationship with technology is a complex and contradictory one, and while she would want to preserve some of it, the rest might be better served as junk or repurposed for spiritual means. Well, she will never get her wish, as it’s impossible even with all of our powers combined, not to mention the scale of destruction that would require, but that’s why they created Gensokyo.

And yet, she ached to watch the sunrise over the mountains again with Yukari. The vague place where Kasen had gone to, but she dared not chase her, even before her departure. Not that they had been close prior. The warm sun, calm breeze, and in the distance, the coming clouds, lightning and thunder, the grey skies before the heavy downpour, swelling rivers and feeding lakes. The humble village near the center, the three forests, a divide between the east and the west… Okina closed her eyes, reimagining the landscapes from the past, but she wasn’t ready to return until she found what she was looking for. How hard it was to be caught in between…

Chapter Text

To step on the fallen and damp leaves, my cane stamping onto them at the same time. The area around is ablaze in an aura of red, orange, and gold, with some green peeking through. There are few undeveloped places near the foothills and the mountains where I can walk without needing faith to bolster my legs, but this is among the few that offered such mobility, even on the other side. That is among the numerous reasons why this place was chosen. Yes! The rundown shrine of the other side will be sighted soon.

In another few minutes of exercise, I look at the collapsed roof, overgrown with weeds, saplings, and trees. Disgraceful, but that reflects the necessity by which Gensokyo must exist. But as it were, cut off from the realm it originated from, new ideas only trickle in slowly, seeing how they may affect the greater society in the interest of artificial safety. But what will I be looking for? Still, this leave is only for myself to improve and prepare. Rather, that clear contrast gives me a growing curiosity, and beyond that, especially with places that Gensokyo is loosely connected to. These, like Former Hell, New Hell, the Netherworld, the Moon, for example, are somewhat familiar but also not. Danger lurks, and that’s what makes it exciting!

The shaped wood, rotting, though giving new life. New comes from old and vice versa, and to keep things from getting boring, it evolves into a big web by association. Madness may come from that, should the speed be too fast or slow. But that’s Yukari’s field for the former, and the latter, mine. What does it mean to consider these concepts, and to realize what the other side may hold as knowledge?

Well, belief drives everyone in the end.

And so to continually delve into the Outside World, where the petty dreams of billions falter or come true. The acceleration of modernization, the loosening of the norms that once bound and suffocated many a person, a shimmering transformation, drawing all that desire the spectacle to it, to be part of it. Is it to be despised? One may say yes, another may say no. Perhaps they just are as it goes. Perfectly fit for a god, no less.

It’s a reexamination of the world after the darkness of the ages before, yet, it’s more of working through it again, through the significance of lived experience. At the same time, lest the mistakes of the past are repeated, the history that came before must be remembered, every record in every format. The zeitgeist, the air across every place is ripe for a new wave of ideas to come, a realization that things could be better. Who knows how long that will last… but new becomes old, as repeated again, and progress against the previous ideologies cannot be stopped, even as those that wish to halt it, fan the flames and place obstructions, in one last attempt to rally under a dying breath. 

The long-lived are not immune to adhering hardline to the old ways, to refuse to live and let live, unless they have let go of imposing elitism. They always want things to remain as they are so they do not have to respond to them. In itself, it is a weakness, and they will be ill-equipped to know and accept the inevitable. If they say out of sight, out of mind, then I say open mind, open soul. Seek to understand, rather than judge and condemn immediately. I, the master, have become the student.

Gensokyo rides between the past and the future, a fragile ship in calm waters for now. But it must prepare for the latter, or we may find ourselves capsized. We may be of the Outside World, but we have rejected it in search of a perfect medium that accepts the rejected, and yet, that, by virtue, is the very same problem that we cannot solve perfectly. All we can do is adjust when the time comes.

Chapter Text

The coarse scratch of the pen underlined the silence in between them. Her eyes were intent on the document before her, a report to the Yamas about the administration of the Netherworld. Yuyuko could be surprisingly dedicated to her work, a solid choice for this position. Unlike when Yukari might lag on repairing a barrier or two on the vast structure of the Hakurei Barrier. That mostly fell to Ran, but Yukari could be a little more responsible with it. Still, although she already asked that of her, she wouldn’t change. But it didn’t bother her that much as long as they didn’t cause any problems. Then she would receive a proper scolding like a servant, even if they were equal in status.

Okina was familiar with these reports, as her domain encompassed part of the administration of Hell. But Yuyuko didn’t need help, because she knew what she needed to do—courtesy of a thousand years of performing the work. It was rote and by the numbers, since the Netherworld only grew in size nowadays. Nothing much ever happened, even with the daily workload, so Yuyuko often grew bored and needed company. However, this big block of work was a monthly report of the resources used and spent from the budget, the quarterly and ad-hoc support for the audit, and the census of the phantoms in the Netherworld, and another once-in-a-decade report. All in all, not a large amount of work if spread over time, but as Yuyuko liked it, she always took it upon herself to finish it in a block of continuous time with breaks, in order to lounge uninterrupted, only with the daily workload, until the next.

Bureaucratic phantoms flew constantly in and out of the room, bringing information for her reports. It made the room quite cold. Yuyuko spoke to them, in this case, acknowledging what they brought for the census. The large room itself was simply decorated. A desk containing folders upon folders of papers and two reference tomes, another table dedicated to snacks and tea, and the chair Yuyuko sat on, all stood in front of tall bookcases filled with tomes and regular books. Four scrolls hung from the wall, of a mountain forest, of a castle in the midst of spring, of flying animals reminiscent of the ones in the Netherworld, and an illustration of Saigyō Hōshi.

Okina slouched in her wheelchair. Today, her fortune contained bad luck, and so her legs were unable to function well. Yuyuko hummed a song, sounding rather familiar. She wondered where she had heard it from. With her plate on her wheelchair table being empty, she rolled over to the snack table and picked out several types of rice crackers, and poured herself some more tea. By now, the tea was cold, but that didn’t bother her. A phantom flew over her head, and she glanced up at it while eating one of the crackers. Not that it was notable, it seemed just like the others. All in all, she would have to wait before Yuyuko could chat. Or she could go bug Youmu, except Youmu had never really had much of interest to say. It must run in the family or something, or maybe she just had never seen much outside of her home or the Netherworld. She could take her out to the Outside World sometime… she would ask about that later.

A gap opened and out came Yukari, poking her head through and raising an eyebrow. “Stop sitting like that! You know it’s not good for your back…”

Okina straightened up her posture and pouted. “But it’s comfy! It’s not like I have an actual human body that can change that much anyway, so why worry?”

“What, you want to add back pain to your myth?”

She laughed at her concern. “Okay, okay. I’ll take it into consideration.”

“I’m not done yet, and it will still take quite a bit,” Yuyuko said. “Please take it outside if you both insist on having a conversation.”

“Oh, I was just checking in. I too have work to do today, concerning Chen. Perhaps I’ll return in a few hours then.” With that, she disappeared into the gap, and the seam merged back together.

Shaking her head, Okina thought about her appearance. “Did she appear just to scold me about that?”

“Quiet, please.”

“Fine, fine.”

Three hours passed, and finally Yuyuko finished the arduous portion of the assignment. In the meantime, she went to chat with Youmu anyway, and expected straightforward answers, and got straightforward answers. Then she left her to clean the massive garden. As for Yuyuko, now it was onto relatively lighter paperwork, and they could talk as she did them. Besides, she didn’t have much to do today, and made sure of that. In addition, she gave Satono and Mai a day off. As usual, if they needed anything, then they could easily call upon her doors. Those two might get into trouble from time to time, but it never was too serious.

“How many are on the census this time?” she asked.

“19,364,139 phantoms,” Yuyuko cheerfully said. “Including the ones diverted from the other Netherworlds. We’ve been getting more of those recently, and they’ve arrived confused, poor souls. It’s only temporary, though. I wouldn’t like to keep them for too long. They will get lonely, despite not having a language barrier any longer.”

“Oh, the other Netherworlds are running out of space again? There needs to be more of them, and I hope there will be. They haven’t changed in hundreds of years, and the number of humans has grown much larger.”

“I agree. But it’s been an opportunity to learn about different cultures. One, Latvian, that I recall, another, Thai, and there’s quite a few more that I have met. It’s not so bad for them to experience new things, in my view. They have a good amount of compatriots here too, but what I said earlier still stands.”

“What did you learn? I’m curious to hear about that.”

“The topic of the day was about the animals in their country. You must understand that I cannot resist a good anecdote about one they saw in life! I heard that Thailand has many elephants, and they are an incredibly important animal. I would like to meet one someday. I think it should be a fascination of mine already. In this anecdote, they related to me that as a warrior, they used to ride them into battle, and work with them.”

“I would have thought that you already knew what elephants were,” Okina said dryly.

Yuyuko chuckled. “Yes, yes, I do. But now I should want pictures, and a visit to the Outside World is in order. But I should have to ask you or Yukari for a favor.”

“Alright, we can take Youmu with us too. Let’s plan that later. What about the Latvian?”

“Their animals are more mundane, but they have a formidable animal, the brown bear. The way they described it to me was nothing short of adorable, yet I want to see one too! They were hikers on a mountain in their country, and told me a story of seeing such a bear and having to scare it off before they could proceed to summit the mountain. They were quite scared.”

“There are black bears in Japan. Brown bears too, in Hokkaido. So, we won’t need to go far to see a brown bear.”

“But the Latvian environment is unique in its own way, isn’t it?”

“Okay, we can go there too. Come to think of it, since the animals in the Netherworld are dead, how do they compare to the animal spirits in the Animal Realm?”

“I believe you should know the answer, sweetie.”

“Perhaps it’s by chance they move into either, then, as animals act on instinct. But many have the presence of mind to choose virtue… But these Netherworld spirits remain silent and as only their animal form, awaiting reincarnation, while those in the Animal Realm have already reincarnated, yet are still dead, and must serve their time.”

Yuyuko sipped from her cup and continued writing.

“I suppose the Animal Realm teaches us to be humble and appreciative of life. What a sordid fate to be sent there. Having to fight for any scrap of resources and for your own existence. It’s an instinct to save yourself first…”

“My memories of life disappeared when I became a ghost.”

“It’s more about your existence as a ghost then, right?”

“I examine myself three times a day.”

“Do you?”

“Yes, I agree.” Her finger tapped on her pen. “But to live in fear of such a fate is a waste, and it is better to focus on the present moment and do the best that one can.”

“A god such as myself doesn’t fear such a thing. Yet, some humans are ruled by severe fear, and I wonder what it is that makes them so. Even as a god watching over them, I fear that I may not understand. What a contradiction.”

“What do you fear, then? A square peg may fit in a round hole, but not fully.” Yuyuko looked up from her work.

“Normally, gods fear disappearance and returning to pure spirit, losing what is ours as a god. But I don’t have such a problem. A diminishing of power, maybe, or my relationships and friendships running into problems. But these are not fears that define me. They’re distant.”

“Say what you want.”

“Very well.” Okina took a long breath. “I imagine that some of it is by experience, where their past colors the present, and that is when the fear comes. Then it’s a matter of their personality, where they may choose to face the situation head-on, or prefer otherwise. But while the fear is straightforward, then the solution is not so simple, because there are many variables that may change over time.”

Listening intently, Yuyuko nodded. “Ah, yes. Go on.”

“Even then, there’s nothing objectively to prevent one from facing a fear. Progress can be made, and yet diminished through a negative experience. But it forces courage, and to give a blessing for that, I believe that it only enhances it. Still, I do not understand it entirely.”

“Two by two, and yet one on either side.”

“What does that mean?”

“I may not be able to understand either, nor the concern itself, but I can provide sympathy and empathy. For example, take Youmu. For some unknown reason, she is afraid of the notion of ghosts, despite being a half-phantom herself. It’s rather harmless and a good tease.” 

“That’s halfway to my point. But you no longer have regrets, so I don’t know if you can help me. Youmu might be better… thank you for reminding me.” She made a mental note to find Youmu again sometime after.

Yuyuko reached across the desk and placed her hand flat, an invitation to hold it. “No, that’s wrong. I still have lingering attachments to this world, or I wouldn’t be a ghost. Don’t worry, though. Perhaps speaking about it may have helped a little bit?”

Okina took her hand and squeezed it. “Maybe. Changing topics, how do you think Yukari will react to my presence in Gensokyo, after all these years?”

“I think she will take it well. She’ll be happy, but the scale of the incident could have cascading effects.”

“I know. I’ll deal with those. It’s my duty to clean up after myself.”

“Speaking of which, what have you been doing recently in the Outside World? Even though we have discussed this topic many times.” Yuyuko let go of her hand and started on her paperwork again.

“The same things that I’ve been doing. Answering prayers, accepting faith from worshippers, festivals, having fun, and watching human society change. I’ve met a lot of remarkable people… unfortunate that some of them have not lived long. I wonder if they have already reincarnated or are staying in the Netherworld.”

Eyeing the cubbies of administrative papers stacked on the far wall, she said, “Would you be interested in finding their phantoms, then? I can locate them for you.”

Okina waved her hand at that. “No need. I’d rather leave the memories where they are, and not interfere in the cycle for my own selfish ends. I met them posing as a human, and I’d rather not break that image. After all, I am the god of the backdoor and all the backs of things, working in the shadows.”

“I wonder what you did with those humans.”

“Oh, it’s just the music festivals I already told you about. Then there’s the sericulture events, and whatever else I get interested in. Including a particular subset of events.”

“I remember the last time you invited me to go along to a music festival. It was amusing to see the humans not realizing that there was a god and a ghost among them, speaking to them. It was unfortunate that it wasn’t for me, although I am amazed that the humans have figured out a way to make such strange sounds out of machines.”

Okina laughed and sipped some more tea. “Well, you insisted on going with me. I couldn’t resist showing you what it’s like now, but maybe rather than an outdoor festival, you’d prefer an indoor one? Besides, there’s still folk music festivals. Electronic music may be the rage nowadays, but there’s plenty of other genres that put on their own.”

“Consider the invitation accepted. Does Yukari want to join?”

“She doesn’t like these events. Too big, and not intimate like Gensokyo’s. It’s too bad, she’s missing out. But hearing that she’s at the Hakurei Shrine events so much, and Gensokyo’s other events… I’m jealous too, now that I’ve been missing out on them. We give and take what we will.”

“Yes, yes. Flower-viewings, the two shrines, Former Hell’s hot springs, Eientei’s exhibitions, it’s all quite earnest. Things have opened up these years, thanks to Reimu, Marisa, Sanae, and a few others. It seems that it’s good to cause trouble every once in a while.”

“Makes things interesting. I see that the Spellcard Rules are working well. Come to think of it, I invited myself to Reimu’s next flower-viewing. Ah, I wonder who I will meet. Certainly the komainu that I brought to life. Reimu and Marisa, a given. I wonder who this Sanae is. There may be a few youkai I recognize…”

“She’s a rival shrine maiden to Reimu. The shrine is Kanako Yasaka’s and Suwako Moriya’s, and she is their wind priestess. A nice and energetic young lady, a little headstrong, I’d say.”

Kanako Yasaka…

At that moment, a slit in space opened beside her wheelchair, and Yukari stepped out with a small bag. Rotating and lowering the gap, she sat on it, and placed the bag on the table. Okina could only marvel at how magnificent she looked, even in her work outfit.

“Yukari!” Yuyuko said, smiling.

“I have chocolates to share.”

Okina laughed. “Speak of the youkai.”

She smirked at her. “Here, we finally, truly meet again since your appearance in Gensokyo. But why in the Netherworld?”

“Don’t read into it, it was only out of convenience.”

Already, Yuyuko had taken the box out of the bag, and its packaging too. When she lifted the cover off, there was a selection of twenty four chocolates. White chocolate, milk chocolate, dark chocolate. Some included mint, raspberry, caramel, and even cinnamon. She laid the box on the table, and Okina found herself salivating at them. Yuyuko picked out one with dark chocolate with caramel. Making a decision, she took a milk chocolate with a raspberry filling. When she popped it into her mouth, it was creamy and sweet, and it broke apart to reveal the raspberry filling, giving a slight tanginess and contrast to the chocolate.

“I’m happy you’re both enjoying them.”

“I’m sorry that the tea is cold. Shall I go and make more?” Yuyuko asked.

“Yes, please. Chocolate is even more enjoyable with tea.”

“No, no,” Okina said. “I can go make it. Continue on with your work.”

“Oh, alright. Thank you.”

Taking the tray with the teapot, Okina wheeled herself to the kitchen. At the sink, she poured out the cold tea, and rinsed the inside, then placed it on the counter. She filled the kettle sitting on the stove, and set it to boil, then got out the green tea leaves from the cabinet. To think that Yuyuko had the kitchen rearranged for her. But her doors negated much for the need for that, although she appreciated it, not having to consume the faith to do so. When the kettle whistled, she placed the tea leaves in the teapot, and turned off the stove. Careful not to spill it, the water rushed into the teapot, and she placed the kettle back on the stove.

Letting it steep, Okina meditated for a few minutes, then removed the strainer from the teapot, and the tea was ready. Rather than carrying it back, she opened a backdoor and placed the teapot back on the tray, then through the door. Job done.

“Thank you,” Yukari and Yuyuko said.

“You’re welcome.” 

Okina wheeled herself back. Yukari was pouring the tea for them all, and set them aside to cool.

“I hope my tea-making ability is fine, as I haven’t done it in a while. I’d be disappointed if my tea is not up to your standards.”

“It’s enough that you made it for us,” Yuyuko gently said. “Appreciate the humbleness of life.”

“You won’t be disappointed. Now, onto the main point. What has brought you back to Gensokyo in such an ostentatious manner?” Yukari clasped her hands together and set them on the table.

“Well, this technological revolution in the Outside World has sped up so quickly that I don’t know if I can even keep up myself.

She took a chocolate and popped it into her mouth. “True, it’s interesting how the general culture is splintering. From the 2000s onward, the analog has turned to digital, and it is presented more and more in daily life. The humans can’t handle it, no matter how they believe they can. This onslaught of constant information has been spiraling out of their control.”

“It’s not just that, and yet it’s precisely why, too. It’s wanting to slow down the pace of life, and immerse myself in Gensokyo’s energy again. Since I’ve been back, there's been a noticeable shift in the atmosphere, and that felt good to be in. I have to credit it to someone, right?”

Yukari closed her eyes, imagining something. “Oh, it couldn’t be only my own efforts. It’s plenty of others’, too. You’d credit everything to yourself if you were in my place.”

“Hah, I can’t say that I wouldn’t.” Okina blew air into her tea cup to cool it further. “I’m looking forward to seeing all of the new faces and how it’s been progressing along.”

“Meanwhile, I’ve always been here in the Netherworld.”

“The reason why she chose to stay away was complicated, to say the least,” Yukari said. “To think it was painful initially, but I suppose what’s done is done. It was a matter of eventuality.”

“Oh, I know. She told me all about it and consulted me, before the glimmerings of the decision. Please don’t get mad.” A small stack of papers moved to the “completed” stack, and it was onto the next set. “Yay, these only require my signature.”

She laughed instead. “I won’t. I might have, years ago. Sometimes, you’re both closer than I think.”

“We’ve always had our ways around the three of us.”

“Here’s to us!” Okina lifted her tea cup, and they clinked theirs together before sipping from them.

Yukari smiled. “Welcome home, Okina. I’ve missed your presence in Gensokyo for far too long. Let’s administrate it together again.”

“Now you’re speaking my language!”

“You're going to be a problem, aren’t you?”

“I could ask the same of you.”

Chapter Text

Okina propped up her chin with her arm. “Errr… this question has been nagging at me for a while… but only now did I finally get the courage to ask it to you. What are we?”

Yukari tilted her head. “Could you please elaborate? I sense that you are speaking in a metaphorical manner.”

“Relationship-wise, I mean. We aren’t exclusive, obviously, we’re only occasionally together, and we’re doing things a lot differently nowadays. But, I would hate to call it friendship, that is very wrong.”

“Hmm… I would struggle to place a label as well. Is it necessary, though? It’s reasonable that after so much time, things would become unconventional and evolve into something that cannot be reliably placed into a box.”

She shrugged. “When I think about it, you’re right. It is what it is, and it’s our own. All that I know is that I enjoy being with you, and that’s good enough for me.”

A giggle escaped from her. “Same as well.” Yukari laid her head down on her shoulder. “I could never dream about life without you, even if we’ve had many difficulties along the way. Did it need to take this long for such a question?”

“No?”

Chapter Text

A quiet afternoon alone. A gloom that cannot be shaken until it has passed completely, and yet it would return again eventually. One that no one except herself knew about, a burden to bear. In the window to Gensokyo, with a blank gaze, Yukari watched the world fly by with each passing second, not bothering with any thoughts of the details. Fairies playing. Skipping stones on the lake. Cheering at the currently farthest stone. Attempting to surpass it. Having fun. She chose passiveness, with no desire to even think. It would hurt otherwise, and it was just how it was.

Stasis, until it wasn’t. Broken so easily, a fragile thing at that. Though Okina still protected the outside, they ran parallel, and only her past influence lingered. The past… What could she have done differently? Did she make a mistake, a lapse of judgment, when that very thing could have convinced her to stay? But it was most likely what she said, nothing more. Her own reasons that would upset her if known, and she wanted to let her do as she pleased, because she had her own motives and will, after all. All she could do was trust her and wait, making do with their fleeting meetings when they had the time. Meanwhile, this youkai was a clingy one. As they say that it’s good to practice self-awareness, that was recognized. How tongue-in-cheek. Sigh…

Okina really was a “grand gestures” kind of person… but she was a sticky one too. That was where her faith in her lay. Someday, she would come again… figuratively she was beyond her reach for now. The twinges of pain persisted, though visits to each other’s homes and meetings in between helped. It better be worth it, for that day left a wound, a sense of failure. Even if it appeared that she lost it in reaction to what was a parting, it was that indefiniteness and the lack of information that hurt her the most, besides what was already mentioned. She should have foreseen it, as Okina was a god of secrets, an obviousness since their first meeting at that. So, in this moment, all that could be done was to bind herself together and carry on, letting the emotions flow through her until she was too tired to continue. 

Speaking to herself in her mind, trying to rationalize another’s decisions, when she didn’t even know the deepest depth of hers, because she wasn’t her. An overdramatic event. But it was real. Nobody could deny that, because it was her perception, it was her reality. So, to turn away and heal, culminating into acceptance… How much time would it take? Her steady gaze out of the window, an old cliché. Perhaps she needed to change. Perhaps she was the one that was stuck, while the other Sages moved on as was a natural way of things. But it seemed comfortable to stay stuck, with no need to do anything. The easy path. It would be easy to want that and let it be. But… 

Yukari stood and walked over to a bookshelf, grabbing a particular thick and heavy book. She laid it upon the table and flipped it open. These pictures… technically recent, as only the earliest cameras kept the beginning of the record, and also a record itself of improvements in that technology. But the majority of these were taken when all of the Sages were present. Grainy and lacking in clarity, but holding valuable and painful memories. The days when even Kasen and Okina saw eye-to-eye, words bound to their actions, their hands, for an idealistic paradise. Before it descended into common arguments among the Sages, when they occasionally roamed the Outside World together, doing however they pleased, with many good times among them… gone now.

Their meetings emptied out, soon dwindling to three, and only two finally. She still had those bottles of fine wine aging in the cellar, but she could not bring herself to open any. Gazing out at the wide blue ocean, wind blowing; a late night storytelling circle to the distant beats of tanuki drumming, that was a strange time; gatherings at her house, then less full of quiet; the amount of pranks dreamed up by Okina and her… Yes, that last one was still ongoing… Could they have these times back again? They all had long lives, didn’t they? So, she wouldn’t give up hope for that day. Just one, to taste it once more.

All things may have an eventual end, but even wisdom gained does not matter one bit when it comes to these situations ruled purely by emotion. Emotion makes one act strange, often contrary to their regular mind, and makes fools out of those that would be sane. Even worse when touched and influenced by all that could, whether through the environment, the unconscious, the past, or anything else, and so that is how it may unravel. But wisdom helps to dull the blow and soften the aftermath, and by those, that is how oneself may regain composure before any drastic reaction happens. A contrary gain, as wisdom itself is borne of time and experience, and the hidden ingredient of pain.

So, she would say to Okina now, go, see what is out there. Gensokyo could use some full-time intelligence on the Outside World. Besides, it wasn’t that bad. It wasn’t as if she was leaving permanently, sealed away, or dead. She could handle being alone, and she had Ran and Chen and Yuyuko and some other people. Yukari pouted and sighed, closing the gap window to Gensokyo. No one was watching her reminiscence, and only Okina saw her that day, but she was still embarrassed, even here.

Okina…

Otherwise, if this overthinking again resulted in going around in circles, then it would be best to refrain from it. Ah, Gensokyo, her pride and joy, and her absolute energy drain. The extent of the effort placed therein, unmeasurable. Yet, in the future to come, what would it look like? How would Gensokyo change, with her watching over its internal affairs alone, even with Ran? A seed of doubt arose from within. Could it last? And some interactions with the Outside World…

Such it was, an unseen future… In fact, Okina would call her a pretentious pain in the ass right now.

And she was right.

A long time ago, she said that every so often, she has twinges of old pains and grudges from those older syncretized gods and portions of them. It was part of why she preferred to act alone, as it was even hard for her to trust others, even her, one of her closest partners. And she desired to handle things by her own ability, as part of her complex about independence and a little bit from the disability side.

It is her nature, or is it? Is she simply used to that? She admired her confidence in following that path then, but even that lay within a certain fear, that which herself was guilty of. Meanwhile, her own confidence lay in the way of her own coordination of intellect versus the problems to be solved, not as much in the way of the loose associations and experience by which she floated and dealt with as a solution to the problems presented to her.

And another memory…

Yukari set down her closed parasol next to a park bench. As she sat down to somewhat match Okina’s height, she reached forward to clutch at her arm. Even if it was the most secluded part, further barriers ensured that no one eavesdropping would hear their words, and an illusion would only show their peaceful rest.

“My dear, there is a difficult question that you must answer.”

Okina turned to her as she covered her hand with her own, eyes glimmering with concern. “What question? What is it about?”

Kissing her briefly on the cheek, she mentally prepared herself. “Even as long as I have known you, what does that mean?”

She chuckled. “What do you mean?”

“An untrustworthy youkai and a secretive god. It would seem that we would repel each other, but we are here. Perhaps I already know the answer.”

A smirk appeared on her face as she removed her hand. “Do you? I believe so. Well, I will say my perspective. Because of the virtue of a shared understanding. You may be on the other side from myself, but upon examination, we seem to be the opposite sides of the same coin.”

Yukari shared the smirk. “Your domain of secrets, while my source is from the unknown. Certain knowledge against unknown knowledge. Then no one else has such a thing. Ah, I have that all to myself, isn’t that special? What do you think?”

“Is this just an elaborate love confession? I love you.”

“The moon will be beautiful tonight.”

“There’s no taking that lightly.” Okina laughed. “You know, I’ve always been fascinated by you, even before I met you properly. Your legends, though few and furtive, had me intrigued, and I desired to get my hands on any more. Then, that fateful day came, and there I was, in my old form. After that, we fought and hated each other until… you know.”

“That certainly is new. Stalking me, were you?” Not a serious accusation at all.

She rubbed the back of her head. “No, no, it’s not like that! I wasn’t watching you.”

“You can admit it. I find it humorous that you took hundreds of years to say that. But, creepy, isn’t it?”

Okina gazed into her eyes. What did she see there? “I insisted already. But, it just never came up. And who tells their interest that they’ve been secretly searching for them, after they meet, unless they would like to get driven off?”

“Indeed, a secret revealed then. You’re a lucky one, but that is another of your domains.” She winked at her. “Does a god of destiny know their own path?” A rather rhetorical question.

“I divined and divined to find that answer to find you. Inconclusive, with mixed results. Well, I’ll tell you what I was doing later.”

“Fufu, a wisp of some science words. I’m rubbing off on you, aren’t I?” She rubbed at her cheek. “I have you now, and will hold you to your words. But you didn’t answer my question.”

Okina glanced downward. “Yes, but it continually changes, as the winding path goes by each action, time passing. That is what it means to have free will.”

A nothing reply in turn. “Then nothing is truly predetermined.”

“I thought I had told you that a long time ago.”

Yukari smiled. “Maybe. Isn’t the time growing long? How about returning to our stroll here?”

“Let’s keep talking on the way, then.” Okina offered her parasol to her.

Chapter Text

The heaviness of wanting someone to share their company with her. Okina sat there, not in the mood to give in and bemoan that fact. She regarded it with detachment, that tug on her heart. It hurt. What was she supposed to do with it, make it go away? Making it go away was beyond her ability, even for a god. The golden glow climbed up higher in the sky, and the birds flew and chirped among the trees. These birds were her company, though they didn’t know it.

Besides, this was her own path to go forth on, to the tune of herself and only herself. This was something that she must do. Pouring another cup of tea, Okina sipped on it. This wasn’t the first time. Those earliest years as her main identity, a lone traveler going to where no one knew her. Memories shrouded in mystery to many of her worshippers, but clear in her mind. Past that, as she found her center of influence, or when she lost it all. 

Why, as to this? She had no good answer. It was too far to turn back from this new secluded path, whose history only she knew. Satono and Mai were slightly too dim-witted, as sorry as she was to say. While they accompanied her, she occasionally wished that she could converse with them on the same level, rather than teacher and student, or master and servant. Their concerns were too different to hers, even then. 

The nature of things turned in a circular direction. Again, that pain. There had only been a few, past and present, that she could do that with. The ones that she would meet on this journey, how many would stay with her for a while, that would remain to be seen. Some, briefly, some, not long, some, a while, and others, a lifetime. Though they would not know that they would be conversing with a god, humans made their lasting impressions, and there was a comfort in that.

Not many had been able to see her true heart in the past, except for the most valuable of them all. Okina laughed to herself, for she didn’t know herself entirely either, despite her mastery over her realms. Yukari was the person that saw the deepest… Missing her… not in the physical sense as they were still together, rather, for when they held a similar sense of direction for Gensokyo. These circumstances had happened before, but not to this degree. Even then… her attachment to the concerns of the Outside World could not be discounted. Herself, as an enduring god from it. 

It wouldn’t be accurate to say they diverged. Whatever Yukari chose, she would follow, because Yukari was the main architect, the one who gathered them all. It didn’t mean that she wouldn’t disagree on some matters. Leaving was something she’d never thought she’d do, and yet, here she was. Hmm, hmm. Except… she recognized that she had been too imposing, and no doubt, she’d caused a rift with the other remaining Sages. What Kasen had said on that day made her more than pause. Was it only because of that?

Well, besides its required functions from her, it would be interesting to see Gensokyo without her influence! She would have to set aside her reservations and get to it! If she should be a fool that resorts to extreme measures, then she should at least be an earnest fool. Let Yukari fulfill her sole vision, as it were, even if they weren’t used to the idea. For all of the time they had spent poring over gathered information, she hated the notion of removing herself from it all. Still, it might be for the better.

But, a thought… it would have been an eventuality that couldn’t have been prevented, for Yukari and her were just those kinds of people.